#and i do not have the option anymore

[piknim]

I kinda regret not doing the whole college experience and like living in a dorm n stuff. I think if i was able to get over my anxiety i would have really enjoyed it

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

Being someone who read Under The Red Hood and came out with the firm belief that, for Jason, it's not about killing Joker, it's about Jason wanting proof Batman would choose him over the Joker (bc shelia chose the joker). Makes seeing any other media where it's all about just wanting the Joker dead is a teeny bit frustrating. to be honest

Jason could've killed the Joker himself, really, really easily. Jason kidnaps the Joker before the confrontation. I can't open my comic for a reference right now, but it felt like he had the Joker for quite a bit before the confrontation. He had him. He beat him up with a crowbar. He had every single opportunity to kill the Joker himself, but he didn't because that wasn't his goal. Make no mistake, he did plan for the Joker to be dead by the end of it, but do you see what im trying to say here

Edit: If I knew this post was gonna get 1000+ notes I would've tried to word it better or something, this was a rant I made on the way to the grocery store 😭

It's not about making Batman kill either. When Batman says he won't kill, Jason adjusts and goes, 'Let ME kill the Joker or kill me to stop me' instead. The test is all about Batman choosing him. The whole final confrontation is Jason's first death again. The parent, The Joker, and the explosives. It even ends with Jason unable to move as a bomb goes off right next to him again because the parent didn't choose Jason. And instead tried finding an option that'd benefit them and (consequencely) letting the Joker walk, again, lol, lmao <-in agony

[lgbtlunaverse]

So I've said multipe times now (here and here) that thinking nmj is just so blinded by privilege he doesn't undertand that acting out of line gets people killed is, in my opinion, a misunderstanding of his character that ignores the part where he's, you know, actively dying the whole time and thinks that's a good thing. But that doesn't mean I don't think privilege plays no role at all in how he views the world.

Specifically, his view that death (at least premature or violent death) means something.

Death isn't always a tragedy to NMJ, but it is always meaningful. If you kill an evil dangerous person for your righteous cause, that death had meaning. There was evil in the world and now there is less of it. Similarly, if you die in the pursuit of your righteous cause, that death has meaning, because the sheer dedication you gave to it that you were willing to die for it will further that cause, and your bretheren will be invigorated by your sacrifice to fight even harder.

If a death isn't meaningful, that's an injustice and it is up to the living to give it meaning. That's what cuts so deep about his father's murder. There were no consequences, no changes, no meaning. Wen Ruohan was just going to get away with it! He fights and wins an entire war to make it mean something, to make it so that the unjust murder of Nie Mingjue's father is part of Wen Ruohan's downfall.

But this is a view he can only hold because he's the kind of person who's death will be meaningful. Most ordinary people's deaths are meaningless. Not ontologically, not inherently, but they are made meaningless because no one cares. For death to be meaningful you either have to be so powerful that anything you risk your life for will be impacted in some way. (Like, say, if you sacrifice a long life for immense martial power in a faustian bargain with a blade) Or if people with that kind of power care enough about you to do so for you. For most people, this isn't true. A starving street kid has no power to change the unfair world that put them there, even if they risk their life trying, and no one will do it for them once they die.

Nie Mingjue knows this in abstract, and of course rightfully believes it's wrong. But all that does is make it yet another righteous cause people should be willing to die for. Everyone's deaths should mean something, we'll make it so or die trying!

This is what the conflict between nieyao is about at its core. Because Jin Guangyao, fundamentally, cannot conceive of his own death as meaningful. Nie Mingjue grew up around powerful men who could change the world but refuse to do so because god forbid they risk a single hair on their perfect heads. Meng Yao, on the other hand, grew up in an environment where no one of importance would blink twice if you died. He was surrounded by meaningless death. Indeed his entire early life is defined by that lack of care.

Meng Shi dies and no one cares. Meng Yao gets thrown off a flight off stairs and no one cares. He has to be the one to do the caring, and once he's gone no one else will do it for him.

So he has to live.

Jin Guangyao eventually gets far enough that he actually does aquire the power to change some things... as long as he's alive. If he changes too much, holds on too tightly to his ideals, he'll die and it'll all be for nothing. He can't sacrifice himself for his goals because doing so would immediately render those goals unobtainable. No one will care about what he tried to do. He won't be a heroic sacrifice, he'll just be trash that finally cleaned itself up.

And well... Nie Mingjue dies, and someone makes it mean something. Makes it mean so much that the entire story of mdzs would not exist without it. Jin Guangyao dies and it doesn't mean anything. Most people are glad to be rid of him, and the few that are not don't do anything to change that.

[puppyeared]

learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way

[pigeonclaw]

I haven't felt very motivated to draw lately (what chronic fatigue does to a guy 😔) but I have cracked open my sketchbook a few times. Mostly to doodle TBC.

[buddyhollyscurls]

I am I WAS a watcher patreon and I just got the email saying they're changing their teirs??? And now all the incentives are for their podcast????

Bro bye

[urfavisananimegirl]

walter white from breaking bad

Walter Hartwell White (Breaking Bad) is an Anime Girl!

[roomba-mangga]

thoughts on thistle and yaad's dynamic that i vomited in the tags of another post but will now try to articulate here: they're not actually family, or at least they shouldn't be. not in a conventional sense anyway. framing them as uncle and nephew (even in a non-literal, silly fantasy world way) rides more on technicality than anything concrete.

what i mean by this is yaad calls thistle by name and says he and delgal were raised "like" brothers. he talks about thistle like he's an outsider imposing himself into the melinis' space, and it's clear that thistle was never legitimized as a member of the family. for thistle's part, though we don't know how he would treat yaad pre-demon brainrot, it's safe to assume based on the way he punishes him—turning him into a doll—and how little is shown in the way of any sort of relationship between them that thistle only cares* about yaad as an extension of delgal (otherwise i'd expect something like kabru and milsiril, because it's not like another complicated interspecies family dynamic would be out of place, yet there's next to nothing on them even in bonus content, just their scant interactions in the main story).

in essence, they're strangers to one another. thistle's desperation to preserve the illusion of a family, a model where he doesn't even fit, was the snare they were caught in for the past thousand years of stasis. yaad-as-nephew is a prop to uphold that illusion, and thistle is playing a role he's unfit to play. in the context of post-canon interactions, attempting to reconstruct that facade would only be a reenactment of trauma for them both (in a deeply compelling way i'd love to watch unfold, tbh), as that "uncle and nephew" framing places thistle in an implicit position of power over someone he's already traumatized through misuse of authority in the past, a role which also perpetuates his adultification and yaad's infantilization in turn. it'd mostly be an obstacle to any real connection.

best to burn the melini family bridge, i think, and if there's still anything salvageable left in the rubble, let something different supplant it.

[church-of-crayak]

i can't hang out with the haunted eye

though i don't know why

[dollya-robinprotector]

The Robin's Landfill Event or Banned-for-Horny mass destruct, one of the Robin's Non-con Events Screencaps series, was a turning point for the Degrees of Lewdity fandom... (qicipedia)

Featured @banned-for-horny and many of the fallen PCs

[studentbyday]

it just occurred to me that i can "casually" learn french and japanese over the winter sem since i'll have the "time." juuusst one of the many many many things i've been putting off but want to do... i wonder if that's spreading myself too thin... my novelty-seeking brain wants to hear different sounds. in different contexts. it's probably a sign i need to get out more but that's besides the point 😂 what do i dooooo there's too many thingssss

[equalperson]

people mostly talk about splitting as literally all-or-nothing--"I love you" or "I hate you"--but I personally experience an in-between point sometimes.

I don't know what I'd call it other than "thin-ice devaluation" or something along those lines.

like, yes I devalued you recently and I realize now that I was being irrational, BUT if you say something even slightly suspicious, hurtful, or incorrect, I'm going to assume that you're evil and/or useless again much faster than I would have before.

[marimbles]

i miss carpisuns sometimes </3

[funnyscienceman]

thinking on it further i wonder if singed being good with kids has like, anything to do with how much Understanding he has of the world and just exudes in every scene he's in. this like benign wisdom. as if he knows exactly why kids should be treated fairly, why you cater to their strengths and support or guide them when it comes to their weaknesses, and doesn't see much reason to stray from that so he just. Does it.

"In my experience, no one in power is innocent."

"Patience is a product of age, both of which I possess in abundance."

"It's always the same look, when one covets a weapon."

He knows how people work. He knows very well, and if his goals were in any way more ambitious or proactive or visible like everyone else's, he could be a genuine master manipulator. He could toy with people whichever way if he wanted to. Hell, he pretty much already does, navigating the interrogation with ease and then letting Ambessa do all the talking when she hires him to get her Warwick. He doesn't say or do anything more than he precisely needs to.

Was it on his mind then, I wonder, when taking Viktor in as a child? Was it the dad part or the scientist part acting when he says, "You want to assist me? Very well. We can be loners together."

Evidently, Viktor holds him in enough regard even after everything with Rio to come back and ask for his help, and then refer to him as a friend later on.

Are the dad and scientist parts of him inseperable?

Viktor anticipated Singed's visit in s2a2. In the time it takes for Singed to go from the front gate to the greenhouse, he's already clocked that 1) the commune is literally dependent on Viktor as a living battery, 2) Viktor's power is diminishing, and 3) oh yeah this shit's definitely gonna help me with my main project, i wonder if i can get viktor to agree; worst case, he'll just say no! Hold on, does he know he's the living battery for this place? Oh goddammit he doesn't, why did i expect otherwise

Is he nice to kids because he has no compelling reason not to be? Is he nice because just being on someone's good side, in general, tends to be more beneficial than not? Is he nice because he's just instinctively a Dad?

He takes Viktor's hand very much on purpose, looking straight at him as he does so, and I wonder if he just Knew doing so would essentially be showing a part of his figurative hand. Viktor's here in the greenhouse because he's trying to heal Vander, after all — restore his humanity, reverse the wolf stuff? Apex Hextech can affect the mind, therefore let's try to use it to cheat death.

He respects Viktor a whole lot, recognized from just the toy boat that the kid's a genius. "She's a rare mutation that I cultivated."

Has he formed any genuine relationships with anyone since Ori was put in the cocoon, or is everything just another step towards saving her from death?

[3416]

just need to give a shoutout to all the people who interact w me or the things i make on here for the love and good vibes. twitter's been pissing me off the past couple days and i just think it reaffirms i'll never really leave tumblr bc the fandom culture here is just so much.. more lol

[hayatheauthor]

the constant cycle of writing my book vs helping people write their books (this blog) vs beta reading vs commercial writing vs what even is writing how do i have time for any of this (i don't)