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favefandomimagines · 3 days ago

Text

Peter (a.b)

Summary: the past has a funny way of ruining the greatest things

AN: I really hope this made sense 😂 I was all over the place

Request: @talkativecarnation hi! omg i looove ur Anthony Bridgerton fics SO MUCH! can i request 10, 9, 13, 12 from your angst prompt list. preferably in that sequence in an arranged courtship/marriage scenario but it's all up to you if you have a better vision for it 🤍 can't wait for this!! TYSM!!!

The estate of Aubrey Hall shimmered in the soft light of dawn, the golden hues of sunrise spilling across the sprawling grounds. The chirping of birds and the faint rustle of leaves in the breeze brought a sense of serenity to the outside world, but within the grand manor, an air of tension lingered.

Anthony Bridgerton sat at the edge of his massive mahogany desk, his head bowed and his hands gripping the edges as though they might anchor him. His study, a room that had always served as his sanctuary, now felt oppressive.

The neatly organized stacks of correspondence and ledgers stood as a testament to the responsibilities he carried as Viscount, yet today, those duties paled in comparison to the turmoil in his heart.

His gaze lingered on the letter before him, the ink slightly smudged from the number of times his fingers had traced its words. Y/N had written it weeks ago, with no intention of it seeing the light of day. A heartfelt plea for understanding, for connection, for something more than the strained coexistence they had settled into since their wedding.

Anthony found the letter in between two large books he had never opened until that day.

Her words were full of vulnerability, and that was what made them so unbearable. She deserved better than the coldness he had offered her.

A marriage born of duty was nothing unusual among the ton. Anthony had entered the arrangement with the pragmatic mindset he applied to all aspects of his life—an advantageous match, one that would bolster both families and secure his legacy.

Y/N was everything he could have hoped for in a wife: poised, intelligent, and well-matched to the demands of her new station. Yet for all her perfection, he felt the weight of failure pressing down on him, a failure to be the husband she deserved.

The truth gnawed at him, an ache he couldn’t ignore. His heart, traitorous and stubborn, remained tethered to a past he could not undo. A past named Siena Russo.

He had loved Siena with a passion he had not known he was capable of. The fiery opera singer had consumed his every thought, her voice and presence filling every corner of his being.

But their love, as wild and all-encompassing as it had been, was doomed from the start. Siena could never fit into his world, and Anthony’s duty to his family had forced him to end it.

Or so he told himself.

The reality was far less simple. The end of his relationship with Siena had not been entirely his decision, and the bitterness of that unresolved goodbye haunted him.

He told himself he had done the right thing, the only thing he could do, but the weight of her absence still lingered, like a ghost he could not exorcise. And now, it threatened to destroy the fragile bond he might have had with Y/N.

He ran a hand through his hair, his frustration mounting. How could he move forward with Y/N when Siena’s shadow still loomed so large? How could he pretend to be the devoted husband she longed for when his heart was so fractured?

Every time he thought he had steeled himself to let the past go, a memory of Siena would creep in—a laugh, a touch, the sound of her voice. It was as if she were etched into his soul, an indelible mark he could not erase.

The creak of the study door startled him, and he quickly folded the letter, tucking it into the drawer as though hiding it could also conceal his guilt. Turning, he saw Benedict standing in the doorway, a cup of tea in hand and a knowing look in his eyes.

“You look as though you’ve seen a ghost, brother,” Benedict said, stepping into the room and setting the cup down on the desk.

Anthony forced a tight smile. “Just tired. The estate requires more attention than usual this time of year.”

Benedict snorted, crossing his arms. “You might fool the rest of the family with that excuse, but not me. What’s troubling you?”

Anthony hesitated. He and Benedict had always shared an unspoken bond, a willingness to confide in one another when the burdens of their respective roles became too much. But this—this was a vulnerability he wasn’t sure he could voice.

“Nothing of importance,” Anthony said finally, turning away.

Benedict studied him for a moment before shaking his head. “You know, Anthony, ignoring a problem doesn’t make it disappear. Whatever it is, you should deal with it before it festers. For your sake. And hers.”

Anthony stiffened at the mention of Y/N, but he said nothing. Benedict left without another word, his parting advice hanging in the air like a challenge Anthony wasn’t ready to face.

Alone again, Anthony let out a long sigh. His brother was right, of course. Avoidance would solve nothing. But how could he face Y/N when he couldn’t even face himself? How could he explain the tangled mess of emotions inside him when he barely understood them?

Anthony leaned back in his chair, staring up at the high ceiling of his study as if searching for answers in its ornate design. He had married Y/N with the intention of fulfilling his duty, of honoring his family’s expectations.

But somewhere along the way, he had begun to see her as more than just his wife in name. She was kind, perceptive, and endlessly patient with him—a patience he knew he had done nothing to deserve.

And that only made it worse.

Because the more he came to admire her, the more he realized how much he was failing her. And every time he looked at her, he couldn’t help but wonder if she already knew. If she could sense the part of him that still belonged to someone else.

He clenched his fists, the guilt and frustration bubbling to the surface. He couldn’t keep living like this, caught between the woman he had lost and the woman he was supposed to love. But no matter how much he tried to convince himself to move forward, Siena’s voice echoed in his mind, whispering reminders of what they had shared and what he had given up.

Anthony closed his eyes, a single thought running through his mind.

How can I give Y/N my heart when it still belongs to someone else?

And in that moment, he realized the answer was one he wasn’t ready to face.

The glow of twilight bathed the grounds of Aubrey Hall in hues of amber and rose, casting long, soft shadows across the manicured gardens. Inside the grand estate, Y/N stood by the window of the bedroom she and Anthony now shared, her hands loosely clasped before her.

Her gaze wandered over the sprawling fields and dense woods beyond, but her thoughts were far from the picturesque view.

She had spent much of the afternoon in quiet solitude, walking the gardens to clear her mind and steady her heart. The beauty of the estate, though breathtaking, did little to soothe the ache that had grown within her since her marriage to Anthony Bridgerton.

Theirs had been a union forged not by love, but by expectation. Duty. Obligation. At the time, she had told herself it would be enough. She would fulfill her role as Viscountess, and in time, affection would blossom between them, as it often did in such arrangements.

But now, months into their marriage, Y/N found herself yearning for more��more than the polite exchanges and careful civility that defined their interactions. She had entered this union willing to give her heart, yet Anthony seemed unwilling—or perhaps unable—to meet her halfway.

The truth of it cut deeply. Anthony was a good man, of that she had no doubt. He was protective, devoted to his family, and carried the weight of his responsibilities with a strength that few could rival. But there was a distance in him, a wall he had built around himself that she couldn’t seem to breach. And worse still, she knew why.

Siena Russo.

The name was never spoken between them, but it lingered in the spaces where silence stretched too long. Y/N had heard whispers of Anthony’s past with the opera singer before their engagement, though she had dismissed them at the time. After all, many men of Anthony’s station had dalliances before settling into respectable marriages. It was a truth of their world, one she had prepared herself to accept.

But this was different. Siena wasn’t merely a part of Anthony’s past—she was still a part of his heart. Y/N could feel it in the way his gaze sometimes drifted when he thought she wasn’t watching, the way his smile never quite reached his eyes when they were alone. She could see it in the way his body tensed whenever a mention of the opera or a familiar tune from the stage drifted through a drawing room.

It wasn’t the existence of Siena that hurt Y/N; it was the hold the other woman still had over Anthony. A hold that no amount of duty or propriety could seem to sever.

Y/N’s thoughts were interrupted by the soft creak of the door opening behind her. She didn’t need to turn to know it was Anthony—she had memorized the rhythm of his footsteps, the sound of his breath when he was near. He hesitated in the doorway for a moment before stepping fully inside, the tension in his posture palpable.

“Y/N,” he said softly, his voice tentative.

She turned to face him, her expression carefully composed, though the effort of keeping her emotions at bay felt exhausting. “Anthony.”

He lingered by the door, as if debating whether to stay or retreat. Finally, he crossed the room, stopping a few paces away from her. His dark eyes met hers, and for a fleeting moment, she thought she saw something vulnerable in his gaze. But it was gone as quickly as it appeared.

“I owe you an apology,” he began, his voice low. “For how I’ve been—how I’ve treated you.”

Y/N’s heart ached at his words, at the sincerity she could hear beneath the surface. But apologies, however genuine, wouldn’t erase the months of loneliness and doubt. “You’ve been distant,” she said quietly, her tone steady despite the emotions swirling inside her. “I’ve tried to understand, to give you time, but it feels as though no matter what I do, you keep me at arm’s length.”

Anthony’s jaw tightened, and he looked away, unable to hold her gaze. “I’m sorry,” he said again, his voice breaking slightly. “I wish I could be the person you want me to be. But I’m not. And I don’t think I ever will be.”

The words hit her like a physical blow, stealing the breath from her lungs. She had suspected as much, had felt it in the coldness of his touch and the distance in his eyes, but hearing him admit it was a pain she hadn’t prepared for.

“Why?” she asked, her voice trembling. “Why won’t you let me in?”

He hesitated, the battle within him playing out across his features. When he finally spoke, his words came in a rush, raw and unfiltered. “You think I don’t notice? You think I don’t see how much I’m hurting you by staying? But I don’t know how to let go.”

“Let go of what?” Y/N pressed, her frustration bubbling to the surface. “Your past? Siena?”

Her words hung in the air like a challenge, and the way Anthony flinched told her all she needed to know. She had tried to avoid speaking Siena’s name, tried to be patient and understanding, but she could no longer ignore the truth.

“You loved her,” Y/N said, her voice soft but steady. “I know you did. And I know that love doesn’t simply vanish. But Anthony, you’re married now. To me. I cannot be a shadow in my own marriage.”

Anthony’s shoulders slumped, and he raked a hand through his hair, his composure unraveling before her eyes. “Every time I think I’ve moved on, you pull me back in,” he admitted, his voice thick with emotion. “But every time, you leave again. I can’t keep doing this.”

Y/N felt tears pricking at her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. She had cried enough in the solitude of her room, in the quiet hours of the night when Anthony lay beside her but felt a thousand miles away. Now, she needed answers.

“Do you think it’s fair to punish me for what you lost with her?” she asked, her voice rising slightly. “Do you think I don’t feel it every day, the way your heart isn’t truly here? The way it belongs to someone else?”

Anthony didn’t respond, his silence speaking volumes. And as Y/N stared at him, her heart breaking anew, she realized she was at a crossroads. She could continue to fight for a man who seemed determined to hold onto his past, or she could let him go and preserve what little of herself remained.

But deep down, she knew she wasn’t ready to give up. Not yet..

The Bridgerton family was known for its lively breakfasts, a time when the entire household gathered to share stories, tease one another, and strategize for the day ahead. But this morning, Y/N had no desire to face the endless chatter of the Bridgerton siblings, nor the weight of Anthony’s brooding presence. She lingered in the garden instead, letting the cool morning air soothe her frayed nerves.

She hadn’t slept. The argument with Anthony had replayed in her mind endlessly, his words like daggers carving into her chest. The rawness of it left her feeling unsteady, as though the ground beneath her feet might crumble at any moment.

She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t hear the soft footsteps approaching until Eloise’s voice broke through the stillness.

“There you are. I was starting to think you’d run away.”

Y/N turned to find Eloise standing a few feet away, her arms crossed and an eyebrow quirked in that familiar, no-nonsense way of hers. Dressed in a casual morning frock with her hair only half-pinned, Eloise looked as though she’d just rolled out of bed—but her sharp eyes and quick tongue betrayed that she was, as always, entirely alert.

“Good morning, Eloise,” Y/N said, her voice betraying none of the turmoil she felt inside.

Eloise tilted her head, studying Y/N with a perceptiveness that was both comforting and unsettling. “Don’t ‘good morning’ me. You look as though you’ve been crying, which is entirely out of character for you. What’s he done this time?”

Y/N’s lips parted in surprise, and Eloise smirked. “Oh, don’t look so shocked. I may not spend my days gossiping like the rest of the ton, but I have eyes. And I’ve known Anthony far too long to be fooled by his brooding act.”

Y/N hesitated, unsure how to respond. She and Eloise had grown close in the months since the wedding, their shared disdain for the more superficial aspects of high society fostering an easy camaraderie. But there were certain things Y/N had never discussed with her sister-in-law, and the state of her marriage was at the top of that list.

“It’s nothing,” Y/N said finally, attempting a weak smile. “Really.”

Eloise scoffed, stepping closer and plopping unceremoniously onto the stone bench beside her. “That’s the worst lie I’ve ever heard, and I’ve heard plenty. Come on, then. Out with it. I promise not to repeat a word, unless it’s to berate my dear brother for being an insufferable idiot.”

Despite herself, Y/N let out a soft laugh, the sound surprising her as much as it seemed to please Eloise.

“That’s better,” Eloise said, giving her a small smile. “You don’t have to tell me everything, but you do realize you’re allowed to be angry with him, don’t you? Anthony has a way of making everyone believe he knows best, but trust me—he’s as clueless as the rest of us, especially when it comes to feelings.”

Y/N sighed, running a hand over the folds of her skirt. “It’s not just that. I… I knew what I was getting into when I married him. Or at least I thought I did. But he’s so—he’s so closed off, Eloise. It’s like he’s locked himself away, and no matter how hard I try, I can’t reach him.”

Eloise frowned, her expression softening. “And let me guess—he’s too busy wallowing in his own guilt to notice how much it’s hurting you.”

Y/N looked at her, startled by the accuracy of the statement. “How do you know?”

“Because I’ve seen him do it before,” Eloise said simply. “With our family, with himself, with anyone who gets too close. Anthony carries the weight of the world on his shoulders, but he refuses to ask for help because he thinks it’s his job to handle everything alone. It’s infuriating, really.”

Y/N’s throat tightened, and she looked down at her lap. “I don’t know how much longer I can keep trying, Eloise. I want to love him, but I don’t know if he’ll ever let me.”

Eloise was quiet for a moment, her gaze thoughtful. Then she reached over and placed a hand over Y/N’s. “You don’t have to do it alone, you know. Loving someone like Anthony is exhausting—believe me, I’ve tried for years as his sister. But you’re not the only one who can knock some sense into him. If you need help, I’m more than happy to remind him that he’s being a complete fool.”

Y/N let out another laugh, this one tinged with relief. “Thank you, Eloise. Truly.”

“Of course,” Eloise said with a grin. “Now, let’s go inside before breakfast is over. If we’re lucky, we might catch Anthony before he disappears into his study to brood. And if he looks even slightly smug, I’ll spill tea on him.”

Y/N smiled, the tension in her chest easing slightly. For the first time in days, she felt a glimmer of hope. Eloise was right—she didn’t have to face this alone. And perhaps, with a little help, she could find a way to reach Anthony after all.

The parlor was dimly lit, the fire in the hearth reduced to glowing embers. The air felt thick, heavy with the weight of unspoken words and lingering tension. Anthony sat on the edge of a high-backed chair, elbows resting on his knees, his head in his hands. Across the room, Y/N stood by the fireplace, her arms wrapped tightly around herself as if warding off a chill that wasn’t there.

Neither of them spoke for what felt like an eternity. The silence was oppressive, broken only by the faint crackle of the fire and the distant ticking of the clock. Y/N’s mind raced with fragments of their earlier argument, the pain of Anthony’s words still fresh and raw.

"I wish I could be the person you want me to be."

"But I’m not. And I don’t think I ever will be."

How was she supposed to move forward after hearing that? How was she supposed to reconcile the man she had vowed to love and honor with the man who now admitted he might never be able to give her his heart?

“I can’t do this anymore,” Y/N said finally, her voice trembling but firm. “I can’t keep pretending everything is fine when it’s not.”

Anthony’s head snapped up at her words, his dark eyes locking onto hers. For a moment, he looked almost startled, as though her declaration had caught him off guard. But then his expression softened, and he let out a long, weary sigh.

“I know,” he said quietly. “I’ve been selfish, Y/N. I’ve been holding onto something I shouldn’t, and in doing so, I’ve hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you.”

Y/N’s lips pressed into a thin line as she fought to keep her composure. “You say that, Anthony, but do you realize what it feels like? To share a life with someone who won’t share themselves in return? I’ve tried to be patient. I’ve tried to understand. But every time I think we’re moving forward, you pull away again.”

Anthony rose from his chair, crossing the room in a few long strides. He stopped a few paces away from her, his hands hanging limply at his sides as if unsure whether he had the right to reach out. “It’s not because of you,” he said, his voice rough with emotion. “It’s because of me. I don’t know how to let go of the past, Y/N. I don’t know how to let go of her.”

There it was. The truth they had danced around for months, laid bare in the dim light of the fire. Her name wasn’t spoken, but it didn’t need to be. Y/N had always known she was competing with a ghost, but hearing Anthony admit it aloud was a different kind of pain—a sharp, searing ache that stole her breath.

“Then why did you marry me?” she asked, her voice breaking. “If you’re still in love with her, why didn’t you fight to be with her?”

Anthony’s jaw tightened, and he looked away, his gaze fixed on the flickering flames. “Because I couldn’t,” he said after a long pause. “She made her choice, and I made mine. I thought… I thought I could move on. That I could be the man my family needed me to be. The man you deserved.”

“But you can’t,” Y/N said bitterly. “Can you?”

His silence was answer enough.

Y/N turned away, tears stinging her eyes as she stared into the fire. “Do you think I don’t see how much this is hurting me? How much it’s breaking me to stay in a marriage where I’ll never be enough for you?”

Anthony’s head snapped up at her words, and he took a step closer, desperation etched into every line of his face. “You are enough,” he said fiercely. “You’re more than enough, Y/N. This isn’t about you.”

“Isn’t it?” she demanded, turning to face him. “I’ve given you everything I have, Anthony. My love, my trust, my patience. And what have you given me in return? A shadow of a husband who’s still in love with someone else.”

His shoulders slumped, and he raked a hand through his hair, his composure unraveling before her eyes. “I don’t know how to fix this,” he said, his voice breaking. “I need to fix this.”

Y/N stared at him, her heart aching at the vulnerability in his voice. She wanted to believe him, wanted to believe that he truly wanted to make things work. But how could she, when he hadn’t yet let go of the woman who still held his heart?

“I don’t know if you can,” she said softly, her voice trembling. “Not until you decide what you really want. Do you want to stay in the past, clinging to something that’s already gone? Or do you want to build a future with me?”

Anthony opened his mouth to speak, but no words came. For the first time in his life, he was truly lost, torn between the ghost of what once was and the promise of what could be. And as Y/N turned and walked away, leaving him alone in the flickering light of the fire, he realized he might not have much time to decide

The door closed softly behind her, but to Anthony, the sound was deafening. It echoed in the empty room, a final punctuation to her words that left him rooted in place. His chest felt tight, constricted, as though the air had been sucked out of the room. For the first time in years, Anthony Bridgerton—the Viscount, the eldest son, the steadfast leader—felt utterly powerless.

He sank back into the chair by the fireplace, his head falling into his hands. The warmth of the embers did little to thaw the chill settling deep in his bones. Y/N’s words replayed in his mind, each one sharp and piercing, cutting deeper than any wound he had ever endured.

"Do you want to stay in the past, clinging to something that’s already gone? Or do you want to build a future with me?"

It was a question he didn’t know how to answer. He had spent so long building walls around himself, convincing everyone—including himself—that he was fine, that he had moved on from Siena, that his marriage to Y/N was enough. But tonight, those walls had come crashing down, and he was left exposed, vulnerable, and unmoored.

The truth was, Anthony didn’t know how to let go of Siena. He had loved her once with a reckless passion that consumed him entirely. But it wasn’t just the loss of Siena that haunted him—it was the idea of love itself. He had seen what it could do, how it could destroy a person. He had watched his mother fall apart after his father’s death, her grief so overwhelming it had nearly crushed her. Anthony had sworn he would never allow himself to feel that kind of pain.

And yet, here he was, on the brink of losing the one person who had dared to love him despite all his flaws, his scars, his mistakes. Y/N had given him her heart, and he had squandered it, too afraid to truly let her in.

His jaw clenched as he stared into the dying fire, frustration and guilt warring within him. He had married Y/N because it was the logical choice, the responsible choice. She was everything a viscountess should be—graceful, intelligent, kind. But somewhere along the way, she had become more than just his wife. She had become his anchor, his light in the darkness he had long resigned himself to. And he was losing her.

The sound of the clock striking midnight jolted him from his thoughts. He couldn’t sit here any longer, wallowing in self-pity and indecision. He had to do something, to find a way to fix the mess he had made. Rising to his feet, he left the parlor and made his way to Y/N’s room, his footsteps echoing in the quiet halls.

When he reached her door, he hesitated, his hand hovering over the doorknob. What could he possibly say to her? How could he make her believe that she was enough, that she was everything, when he hadn’t even been able to admit it to himself until now?

Steeling himself, Anthony knocked softly. “Y/N,” he called, his voice low but steady. “It’s me.”

There was no response. For a moment, he considered walking away, giving her the space she clearly needed. But then the door creaked open, and Y/N stood before him, her expression guarded. She was still in the same dress she had worn earlier, though her hair was loose now, cascading over her shoulders in soft waves. Her eyes, red-rimmed from crying, met his, and the sight of her broke something inside him.

“What do you want, Anthony?” she asked, her voice tired.

He swallowed hard, struggling to find the right words. “I don’t know how to fix this,” he admitted, his voice raw. “But I can’t lose you. Please… tell me how to make it right.”

Her lips parted in surprise, but she quickly schooled her expression, crossing her arms over her chest. “It’s not that simple,” she said. “You can’t just say you don’t want to lose me and expect everything to change. You have to mean it, Anthony. You have to show me.”

“I do mean it,” he said, taking a step closer. “I’ve been a coward, Y/N. I’ve been so afraid of opening myself up, of losing someone I care about, that I didn’t realize I was pushing you away. But I see it now. I see how much I’ve hurt you, and I hate myself for it. I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I’m begging you—give me a chance to prove that I can be the man you deserve.”

Her eyes searched his, as though trying to determine if his words were genuine. “And what about her?” she asked quietly. “What about Siena?”

Anthony’s heart clenched at the mention of her name. He had spent so long holding onto the memory of Siena, convincing himself that he could never feel that kind of love again. But standing here, looking at Y/N, he realized how wrong he had been. His feelings for Siena had been fleeting, intense but ultimately unsustainable. What he felt for Y/N was different—it was steady, grounding, and terrifying in its depth.

“Siena was my past,” he said, his voice steady. “You’re my future, Y/N. If you’ll let me, I want to build that future with you.”

Tears welled in her eyes, and for a moment, Anthony feared he had said too little, too late. But then she stepped aside, opening the door wider, and he knew she was giving him a chance—a chance to prove that he could be the husband she needed, the man she deserved.

And Anthony vowed to himself that he would not squander it.

#imagine #imagines #anthony bridgerton x reader #anthony bridgerton imagine #anthony bridgerton #bridgerton imagine #benedict bridgerton #eloise bridgerton #bridgerton

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frownyalfred · 14 hours ago

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Some questions and thoughts for the Coral Room

I noticed that there are often mentions of beta mothers. Alfred is jokingly compared or called one, beta mothers are all swarming Bruce in your last post, etc. etc.

But I also remember that Betas do not really have a childbearing role in your world. They're there so they can care for the pack as a whole and jump in if either Alpha or Omega (or both, poor Alfred) are indisposed for whatever reason (mentioned childbearing, childcare, drops, death (poor Alfred²))

So are there just Betas that do the majority of child care and are thus assigned the extra role of parent, additionally to already being in a pack that communally raises the pups?

How do Betas generally cope with the nuclear family constellation that's become the norm? They can adopt children, but not sire or carry their "own". Alphas and Omegas would also seek out each other for ruts or heats, since that's what's expected. So building romantic relationships would be pretty limited in the way modern society is structured.

What are their struggles? What are their norms? How do the maneuver a world that's pressures Alphas, objectives Omegas and forgets Betas?

Excellent question. You'll probably have noticed that the references to beta mothers in the fic are purposefully toward older beta women, or those who are from a few generations back. They're the last holdover of the pack mentality before the nuclear family shift. And you're absolutely right, they serve as parents and/or communal carers in the pack hierarchy, despite not being childbearers.

But, now that packs are dying out and shifting to a more nuclear family model, beta mothers are feeling that shift the most. They don't have 'children' in the sense of alphas and omegas, in that they are children they sired. But back in the old ways, any child they parented was theirs, just as much as it was the alpha or omega's.

This new mindset definitely pressures betas to fall into relationships with other betas, and yes I'd imagine some would adopt. Others fall into nanny/caregiving roles for alpha/omega pairs but fall short of being allowed to use the 'beta mother' title, since it's essentially defunct. And those alpha/omega pairs rarely induct those folks into their pack, largely because they don't have one anymore outside of their mating bond.

Alfred is a good example of a pack beta / beta mother holdover from the earlier times. Thomas and Martha were old enough and from old family lines that they still thought of their possible children, their house, and their future as a pack. As we see in one of the spin off fics, Martha refuses to proceed with her pregnancy (jokingly) until Thomas names Alfred as pack beta. I truly believe their plan was to have many children, and to start a formal pack that way. Which they would be allowed to more easily by society, as they were old and "eccentric" as opposed to trying to fit into the modern working nuclear family mindset.

A big theme I was kind of putting off to the side in ASOH (but talked a lot about here) is how Bruce + Clark are bringing back some older traditions, thanks in no small part to Lex. They prioritize a pack mindset and rarely even think about the more modern family setup others follow. This puts them in conflict with folks like the huffy alpha junior (I forget what i named him -- Graham?) at the gala who is rude to Lex, only for his father (Senior) to treat Lex with older omega customs and respect.

So yes, in a long winded answer to your question: betas probably suffer the most in this new world, because they are forced to curb their instincts that would normally be flourishing in a pack hierarchy. Alfred did this for a while when Bruce was going through his own issues with being an omega -- but it's clearly not ideal for him, and certainly hurt him long term after operating as a pack beta for his parents.

This is also a bit of a joke for myself, but the beta mother joke Lex makes precedes him going over and introducing himself to them in order to win favor. He immediately asks them if any of their sons are single -- this is a subtle way (ish) to indicate that while he's younger, he respects the beta mother role and sees them as valid parents. Of course this wins them over right away, as we see briefly. Clark also wins them over by politely chatting with them in their beta capacity, though he's not as aware of the high society lines as Lex or Bruce are.

#a room full of coral #a/b/o mention #a/b/o tw #mpreg mention #mpreg tw #jason todd #bruce wayne #lex luthor #clark kent #a sky of honey #asks #myfic #anon #theresurrectionist

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zshiftsrealities · 2 days ago

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PERCIEVENCE AND EXPECTATIONS

your expectations are directly linked to your manifestations and them becoming a reality. and how you percieve things around you is a reflection of what your expectations are. just like how they say every misunderstanding is a confession of your view on something, your reaction to the 3d and your percievence of it is a confession of what you actually believe in. because if you believe what you want will show up, you won't be getting angry about “not seeing it” because you know that it will show up.

what you focus on, you see more of it. if today I start focusing on seeing red cars around me, i'm gonna start seeing red cars around me, and then i'll have a thought like “woah, didn't know there were so many red cars”, because there weren't until I decided to start seeing them. so instead of focusing on how your desire “isn't showing up”, focus on the knowing of “it will show up, sooner or later”.

I often have this thought of “yeah I guess it's somewhat true that our mind controls the reality we see. but there are so many instances where stuff happened and I didn't even think of it, or what I thought of didn't happen. so did the law not work then?”, and then i'm annoyed because I seriously can't be pissing myself off right now 😭 like be fr, which side are you on?

but on a serious note, I realized why that would be the case, and it has everything to do with your self concept and your percievence of things around you. because yeah, I did want something to happen and the the opposite of it did. why? because I was so deep in this mindset of “everything was happening for the worst” and “I don't deserve good things” blah blah blah. so obviously (🙄), that's exactly what happened. what I believed in was what showed up.

I just today read one of Neville's books online and as I was getting ready to take a nap, I was dissecting everything I read and this thought appeared.

“see what you want to see, to see what you want to see.”

— zshiftsrealities, 2025 (lol)

you have to see it in imagination to see it in reality. and if you continue seeing the opposite of it, then don't be upset if that shows up because — as much as it sucks to hear it — that's your own doing. because what you expect is what will be. you will never see something show up for you unless you expect it to do so first, whether consciously or subconsciously. and the irony of it all is, you don't even have to be too specific with this expectation. you can just today start expecting only good things happening to you, and whatever you consider as “good” will start happening. same with the bad, and same with the “unimaginable”.

everything that happens to you, happens for your own good, never against you— unless you think it does. and then it will. because nothing has any meaning attached to it other than the meaning you give it. you choose to perceive something the way you percieve it, so percieve it in a way you want it to appear and show up for you.

it's not a matter of it being possible or not, nor of whether it can be manifested or not— it's the matter of if you think you deserve it or not. because if you think you don't deserve something, you simply cannot have it. similarly, if you think you deserve it, then it doesn't matter how impossible it seems— you will have it.

so just be “crazy” and believe everything is working in your favor 24/7, because it is. believe that what you see as a bad circumstance is actually just all in your head, and is actually somehow in your very favor, because it is. believe that nothing can ever work against you, because it simply can't. the point of existence of everything is to be working in your favor, and if it was to not do that, then it simply wouldn't exist anymore.

your enemy isn't your thoughts or your mind, it's that little voice in your head that disguises itself as you and fills your mind with bullshit thoughts. and it's only there because you think it's you. it's not! anything that is affirming something that's against what you want is not you. because you know, you wouldn't do something like that. so identify this little monster and pick it apart until nothing's left of it. until it doesn't have a voice anymore, or any place in your mind.

also, read these two points, and had a huge “eureka!” moment.

“you do not command things to appear by your words or loud affirmations. such vain repetition is more often than not confirmation of the opposite.”

— Neville Goddard, At Your Command

because I get the point, repeat affirmations to make your mind believe them. works wonders, I know. but some minds are just so awfully stubborn that the more you affirm, the more they clap back and try to shut you out instead.

the more you focus on your “desire” by repeated affirming, or by affirming every single detail about it, the more it starts to create doubts about it actually coming to pass.

“commands, to be effective, must be short and to the point.”

— Neville Goddard, At Your Command

so, make it short, just like I said before— just expect good to happen. be specific and be general about it at the same time. that's it. how hard is it? try saying it to yourself, “from now on, only good will happen to me”. do you hear your mind going “nuh uh”? no, because why would it? (if you do, your mind needs some serious beating, i'm not even kidding).

but the point is, when you start expecting something, you start thinking of it actually appearing, and the feeling of it already being here naturally comes with it. like, say you post something (on any platform), and now you're expecting for other people to see it and like it. your mind would “naturally” be visualizing this happening without you even wanting it to (or atleast is the case with me). try it even. it's actually that easy. that's what they mean when they say it's easy. because it's easy. don't try to reason with this and make it difficult. accept it is easy and move on and actually get what you want.

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true-blue-sonic · 1 day ago

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Hey uh, I read your fics a lot and I really enjoy your writing style, I get emotionally invested in characters I usually don't, and our ships align too ^^,

I was wondering for either Sonilver or Espilver (its your choice!), how would they react to one of them getting kidnapped? I feel like you'd be the best to ask on a topic like this, your viewpoints are usually pretty spot on in my opinion!

Its alright to ignore this I'm pretty shy-

Thank you for the compliments, that makes me happy to hear!❤️ And no need to be shy, I love answering questions ^-^

I can do all three characters, that is no problem! For Sonic, we kind of know how he would react, based on Lost World: where he's his quippy self for a large part of the start of the game, the moment Tails is kidnapped, that is gone. Just compare how Sonic talks to Zor compared to, say, Zazz! With Zazz, there's a constant smile on Sonic's face, and he's standing all relaxed and easy-going (e.g. with one hand on his side; it conveys something rather callous to me). But then with Zor, Sonic's obviously pissed off: he's talking loudly, getting right into Zor's face with ticked-off body language, and all jokes and japes have disappeared entirely. Of course, Tails and Sonic are the Unbreakable Bond, so it makes sense Sonic reacts so strongly to his brother getting kidnapped. But should that happen to Silver when he and Sonic are in a relationship, I think Sonic would be equally angry. He strikes me as a character with a "I don't care what you do to me, but don't you dare lay a finger on anybody I cherish" kind of mindset. So if Silver got abducted, all the jokes would be thrown out the window, and leave a rather angry hedgehog who is going to make things right immediately in their wake.

As for Espio, I think he'd also be pissed off, but for him it'd be more of a... quiet shimmering underneath the surface? Like, you can tell that he's mad, but he's also very calmly keeping up his activities while planning to rescue Silver. I figure it's more in his tone of voice and the fact his motions seem just a bit more sharp and locked-up compared to normal. And whoever dared lay a finger on Silver is utterly fucked: Espio won't rest until they've been removed off the face of the earth. But Espio is skilled in keeping his focus, so even if he's raging on the inside at what happened, I don't think he'd let it impact his actions much. If anything, he might become even more careful to ensure a greater chance of success.

Now, as for Silver: I think compared to both Sonic and Espio, his anger would be a lot louder. He's already quite the passionate dude who doesn't tend to make quips and jokes like Sonic and who isn't calm and collected like Espio, so that passion shoots through the roof should either Sonic or Espio be abducted. He's definitely going to be the most reckless of the three, racing in without thinking to get his beloved back (which might be something a villain is counting on, actually). Especially with Espio that forms a problem: in Rivals 2 we see Espio take the role of the more calm and collected right-hand-man who comes up with plans should Silver be unable to. So, if he's not around to aid Silver and keep him calm, Silver is gonna take incredibly reckless actions that he just powers through with the might of his PK alone, I feel like. I have no doubt that he'll succeed in rescuing either Sonic or Espio, but he's definitely the one with the least of a plan and the highest levels of fuming anger between the three of them. To sketch the difference: if we were to put him in the Lost World situation with Zor, I think Silver wouldn't even have angrily demanded the Deadly Six return Sonic/Espio; he'd just have rushed right in and beat the hell out of Zor instead.

So that's how I think the three of them would react! ^-^

#glad to hear you like my writing so much🍀 I love Espilver and Sonilver so it makes me happy that people enjoy what I write about them ^-^#silver the hedgehog #espio the chameleon #sonic the hedgehog #espilver #sonilver

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my-rose-tinted-glasses · 3 days ago

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Hi! It's a new year, and I've decided to make a small change to my space. I might gif less than I did last year cause at the end of the year I felt a bit of a burnout with the whole process, so I'll gif when I feel like it, and might not keep it as consistent. Also, I sorta got over myself and my insecurities and have started just posting more random thoughts, because who cares? This is my house and I shall inflict my opinions and silly thoughts on my followers. It's been great. I will update this post through the month mostly with links to the stuff I write in the meantime.

QL - Currently Watching

🇯🇵 Call Me by No-Name [4/8] - The visuals are the best part of this for me. Although I'm getting increasingly curious about the name. Just like @lurkingshan wrote here, I was underwhelmed by the bloody hands reveal. I was expecting something darker, because well, the show kinda put me in that mindset. I'm having trouble connecting to Megumi on any level tbh, and it's Kotoha that holds my attention.

🇰🇷 FC Soldout [3/10] - This was by far the best episode so far. It seems there's a pining boy, second chance romance thing going on. And there was some actual football happening this episode, so things are looking up.

🇨🇳 I'll Turn Around This Time [4/6] - I'm caught up.

🇹🇼 Impression of Youth [4/9] - That was faster than I expected. The scene in the classroom was very well done. And it seems like things will progress quite quickly from here. I'm enjoying the main couple more than I thought I would. I don't know how I feel about the second couple. I'm just not feeling right now, although that might change.

🇹🇭 Ossan's Love Th [4/12] - I love them. Surprising, I know. Mix is just always a delight. Earth is doing a great job and the show is actually funny. And insane obviously. I'm having a wonderful time basically.

🇹🇭 Perfect 10 Liners [14/24] - I adore them.

🇹🇭 Sangmin Dinneaw [5/8] - This show is definitely one of the weirdest I ever saw. The whiplash from one scene to the next is unparalleled. They are kinda cute but I'm kinda over it. Also at this point, I kinda don't want the sides to end up together. Athit, please sweetie, don't settle for being the backup. But of course he's gonna.

🇹🇭 The Boy Next World [4/10] - Ok, so we all agree that Cir is just more than a little insane, like probably because of that mother, and not really from a parallel universe, and has probably been stalking watching Phu from afar since that day in the classroom, right? Great.

🇹🇭 The Heart Killers [10/12] - I'm still watching quietly.

🇹🇭 ThamePo [8/13] - A triangle well done. I continue to love the friendships being important and the group scenes are so good. ThamePo are quickly becoming a favourite thai bl couple for me. The romance is so good and I'm constantly in a very undignified state of euphoria while watching them.

🇯🇵 When It Rains, It Pours [4/7] - Just misery. All around. More here.

🇹🇭 Your Sky [11/12] - Hia and Real need to get on with it. Lee and Ghlai need their own show. Teerak and Fah continue to be the most lovable couple in all the land.

QL - Finished

🇹🇭 Caged Again - Junior was delightful but the show got a bit choppy towards the end, there was too much time spent on the bad guys and I think the pacing suffered so the show lost me a bit in the last couple of episodes. JuniorSun delivered some great moments. I continue to love Nokia and Jaonine and will tune in if they make another show.

🇹🇭 Fourever You - I can't believe it's over. This was a long, hard slog. I like most of the actors a lot and they were what kept me going until the end. Hill and Ter get all the awards for miscommunication.

🇯🇵Miseinen - I think it started off really good but eventually the show got too much into the metaphors and the visuals and the story suffered. I really recommend reading the manhwa because I think the themes in the show kinda fell apart at some point and in that way I think the source material is much more satisfying. I still like the show overall and the actors did a wonderful job, but the show raised my expectations a lot and then couldn't really deliver.

🇹🇼 See Your Love - I love them a normal amount. That scene in the closet will make any favourite scenes list in the foreseeable future. This show did a lot of things well. The dad was still an asshole by the end, Ji Xiang wasn't magically fixed by the power of love, Shaopeng wasn't perfect and his family was one of the best parts and that dad vs dad scene was epic. With that said, everything else, the family drama and the side couple, was a mess. They all kiss good tho. As we've come to expect from Taiwan the kissing was very good all around, as were the nc scenes. I think they all had good chemistry, although I wish the side couple's story was tighter.

Others - Watched

It's been mostly a month of rewatches so not a lot to report. I did watch Paradise of Thorns a couple of weeks ago and I still have a lot of hate in my heart. Also squid game S2 , which I loved but pissed me off that they split the storyline into two seasons cause now I have to wait until June for the rest. Anyway...

I think that's all for now. Oh and I'm also watching and loving Red Blue. Despite what I said at the start, I'm still open for gif requests. Hope you all have a wonderful weekend and thank the heavens January is finally over. 💜

Coming in February 05/02 - 🇹🇭 Reverse with Me (GL) 06/02 - 🇰🇷 Heart Stain 07/02 - 🇻🇳 Fight for Love 08/02 - 🇹🇭 Gelboys 14/02 - 🇹🇭 The Last Time 14/02 - 🇹🇼 Exclusive Love 18/02 - 🇹🇼 Fragrance of the First Flower S2 (GL) 27/02 - 🇰🇷 Secret Relationship

#perfect 10 liners #the boy next world #ossan's love th #thamepo #sangmin dinneaw #your sky the series #call me by no name #futtara doshaburi #fc soldout #impression of youth #japanese bl #japanese gl #thai bl #korean bl #taiwan bl #multi ql #multi bl #rosy watchlist #rose rambles

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