#and i am so valid for this

[mofsblog]

If there's one shot that's stuck with me during the whole jayce and viktor sequence, it's this one short flashback from season 1. We see almost see Viktor through Jayce's eyes and he looks so? Soft? And the way Viktor looks at him with such tenderness and love in this eyes (his eyes literally soften when he looks at him). This shot just feels so intimate. I feel like I'm walking in on something that I shouldn't

[idolomantises]

I think one of the more unfortunate consequences to creators being more interactive with fans is that a lot of fans/fandoms normalized this idea that creators have to explain/validate every headcanon they have.

[egophiliac]

he did it! 🐍 and it only took...uhhh...well, there probably could've been less punches, but why hold back!

PUNCHES FOR EVERYONE

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

Plain-text version:

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[lotus-pear]

free will is drawing ur two favorite characters together and making them gay

[vodid]

little animation <3

[keferon]

Chapters 46 and 47 were…….oh my god

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

The Charcuterie Board, as designed by your votes! Thank you to everyone who participated; this was a fun challenge!

[natasha-in-space]

This new cg has me in a chokehold, so have some cute profile pics I made for me and my friends! I love them your honor 😭💕

Edit since I've gotten a few questions on this: these are free to use wherever you like!! Credit would be nice, but not mandatory <3

[sunnyxjarrus]

headcannon that Stan is actually naturally smart and stuff but he gave up on applying himself to studies because no matter how well he did ford did better and he decided that if it wasn’t good enough why should he try to be good enough

[tea-cat-arts]

Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will

[moeblob]

I enjoyed the Heroes request thank you anon o7

And also I have decided not only will Haley take pics of the cosplay, she makes it because if she doesn't, who will. Gotta be the change you wanna see in the world. (Alex just there for moral support)

[nashdoesstuff]

i’d like to say, on days like these, that i’m scared.

the majority of my followers, i think, are as well.

please stay safe— we have four years of this. we can do this. they can’t erase us. we’ll always be here, out and open or in the dark, we’re here.

[cometblaster2070]

do you think ariana grande has zero fear of saying and doing whatever the fuck she wants during the wicked press tour like about glinda being gay and in love with elphaba and all because she knows that literally nothing will come close to the bad press she gets by simply being with ethan slater so she just goes fuck it, GELPHIE IS CANON EVERYONE GLINDA IS A FUCKING LESBIAN AND SHE'S GAY FOR THE WITCH.

[heymacy]

IAN GALLAGHER + his journey with bipolar disorder

╰┈➤ “At times, being bipolar can be an all-consuming challenge, requiring a lot of stamina and even more courage, so if you’re living with this illness and functioning at all, it’s something to be proud of, not ashamed of." - Carrie Fisher

[writingjourney]

why is it "Tobias hates poor fans who can't attend shows and now they're not even getting tiktok edits" and not "people have been SO excessive with their phone usage that it's ruining shows for artists and many fans alike and the only way to combat it at this point is to have no-phone shows, which is not ideal for artist nor fans but could hopefully lead to a change in attitude towards live music in the long term"