#and i am low key living for it

[bitchslapblastoids]

having a hard time seeing how it’s invasive to ask about their relationship status esp when I feel like it was asked pretty tactfully and their whole brand is now one another/their whole joint Thing and these days they basically turn on the camera and film 15 mins of horseshit to send to an editor but we eat it up bc they’re so busy hearteyesing one another the whole video that we don’t even notice/care that it’s mostly horseshit content plus they’re now doing a tour about the whole joint Thing and their whole horned up history which is the reason they’re even doing this press and there’s rly no more smoke and mirrors around discussing #phan bc how open will the door be so there’s only one remaining question so it seems goofy to not ask tbh

[thou-babbling-brook]

Bro I can’t believe I’m in Ezioland rn 😤🇮🇹🗡️

[borealwrites]

Whenever there was a storm, Iruka remembers his parents hiding him away. The barrier seals that cover his windows dull the thunder into a low rumble, like how he remembers the sea, and all he can see through the glass is an inky darkness. Those seals are the first ones they teach him, and they tell him to always have them on hand.

When he’s a little older, he asks why he can’t watch the storm like his friends. They tell him that around when he was born, there was a terrible storm that lasted for weeks. In desperation, his grandfather prayed to the storm gods, offering up his newly born grandson as a sacrifice if they would make them stop. And the storms stopped. Unwilling to let such a fate befall their child, his parents took him and fled to Konoha.

Iruka isn’t sure he believes in storm gods, but he loves his parents. Then the kyuubi comes, and suddenly gods don’t seem so fake anymore. So he covers his room at the orphanage and then his apartment with wards, and bites back the defensiveness when Mizuki makes fun of him. It isn’t the thunder and lightning he’s afraid of, it’s what they could bring.

When storms are coming, he can feel his skin crawl, like someone is watching him. Iruka strengthens the wards on his apartment and doesn’t take missions, instead hiding away in the Hokage Tower, where nobody can touch him. Some storms make it feel like someone if pounding at his barriers. On those nights he tucks himself into the corner of his apartment, as far from his windows as he can, and huddles under a blanket, wishing he weren’t so alone.

But Iruka cannot outrun and avoid storms forever. There’s a stillness in the air when he’s assigned a mission with Hatake Kakashi that he cannot refuse. Overhead the clouds are full and heavy with rain, and there’s a tinge of ozone that sets Iruka’s nerves on edge. Thunder rumbles in the distant sky when they find the enemy’s trail, and the clouds burst upon first clash.

It takes every bit of Iruka’s skill to keep from being overwhelmed. The enemy is too strong, and his heart too soft. All the warnings his parents repeated tug at him, and he’s too distracted.

Lightning strikes the tree that Iruka’s opponent is crouched in, close enough he can feel the heat. The air is saturated with enough chakra that Iruka feels drunk off it, even as it makes his hair stand on end. Blinking to clear the searing light from his eyes, Iruka chokes on a gasp.

Before him stands Kakashi, his arm buried in the chest of the now very crispy enemy ninja, sparks of electricity arcing almost lazily across his body. With a flick of his wrist Kakashi’s arm is free, and he glares down at the corpse. Something feels wrong, and while Iruka’s common sense screams at him to move, he feels rooted to the spot. Two eyes, one storm cloud grey and the other heat lightning red, lock onto his.

Kakashi’s hand, the one that had just killed a man, cups Iruka’s cheek. Once, while experimenting with seals, Iruka had shocked himself with a raiton based seal. It had hurt, and left his arm numb for two days. The merest brush of Kakashi’s fingers brings the same feelings for half a second before subsiding into a strange tingling sensation.

“I can finally touch you, my Iruka, my bride,” Kakashi’s voice was a low growl, an almost predatory sound that made Iruka jerk back. As soon as he broke contact with Kakashi, it seemed like all of Iruka’s strength left him. Like a puppet with cut strings he collapsed, and was only saved by Kakashi gathering him into his arms.

“Rest, Iruka. I’ll take care of everything else,” Kakashi cooed, and Iruka found himself helpless to resist. His last thought before he sank into unconsciousness was if his parents would be disappointed he didn’t fight harder.

This can now be found, in an expanded version, on Ao3

[incorrectlasthours]

So we all agree Jesse is going to be the next one to run the London Institute right

[downtherabbitholewithlucy]

[Me, everyday I'm not at a Limp Bizkit concert]

Hey there Delilah, what's it like in Loserville?

[future-crab]

Every time I listen to True Trans Soul Rebel, I want to do that thing where I post my favorite lyrics to tumblr and get between zero and two notes (everyone loves it and thinks it’s charming it’s not annoying at all), but unfortunately out of context “You should have been a mother, you should have been a wife, you should have been gone from here years ago you should be living a different life,” sounds like some weird tradcath shit about how women need to stay in the kitchen.

[pageofheartdj]

I fucking hate this world /hj

[itspileofgoodthings]

I hate that so much of life is interpretation of moral rules and contextualizing them in the reality in which you live so that they apply but that there’s no way to know 100% for sure if you’re right?????? On some level you just have to TRUST?? And I just????????

[ask-the-sexyman-squad]

Did everything go well, is DT alright?

"Shit...shit shit shit...ow..."

Truth be told, they never expected to be in a situation like this. Yet here they were, in the hospital, on a bed, about to have twins. Yes it had been hours later, but nothing extreme has happened yet.

And this only terrified Alastor. He didn't know what would happen, nor did it know if they were going to be okay.

"...dad? Dad they're okay...plus we can be in the room with them, the doctors said it was okay..."

"..."

"Dad?"

"....."

"Alastor. They're okay...they're gonna be okay...I promise you. They're in safe hands...alright?"

"...alright."

[itmeblog]

Biden stepped down.

[iamthepulta]

There's the little evil voice in the back of my mind that's saying "five hours is enough :) U will write in the morning before 10am :)" because I could keep rereading the Liztlie AU because it's a lot of fun and chapter 21 fucks. But this is the evil voice talking. :(

[izayoichan]

A little walk. 🎶

[blindbisexualgoose]

Re-reading the Grishaverse books. Where tf are all the Nikolai fics?

[isostatic-uplift]

.

[lettuce-gremlin]

Hrm... one bedroom apartment in the city that's $1,250 per month... which is still a bit out of my price range but definitely better than literally everything else I've seen so far

[livefinn]

he didn't sign up for this