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#and honest to god insults
froggybowtie · 8 months
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Okay, now having seen the hazbin hotel episodes i just cannot fathom why so many people talk about it like it's the worst thing ever or that it is unfathomable people would like it.
There's valid criticism I've seen, and I agree with some (like the pacing and dialogue is a bit whatever sometimes.) but like cmon. I think it's a good show with a lot of promise.
P.s. it's hard not to feel like this is just another case of everyone being harder on queer creators than if they weren't, and if they don't make something perfect it's torn to shreds.
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shannonsketches · 4 months
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like why did they change where Vegeta was when Cell announced the cell games in the anime
why did they make this vegeta starting shit with yamcha instead of chillin in the lab with his family? why did they take Bulma out of the lab? Why'd they say she was Out while Dr Brief was repairing 16? Why did they change Bulma working on advanced robotics to running in late with her baby?
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it's the same scene except: - Bulma's actively at work being a scientist - Vegeta's not being rude to her (or anyone else!) - Vegeta waits for Trunks instead of leaving the room - Cell interrupted the airwaves, which means Trunks and Vegeta were just hanging out with Bulma and Dr B while they were working
Those are all Great Character Details!! That the anime rails against!!
#these cowards afraid of showing Vegeta actively choosing to be around his wife and child even when he's Bad#Because Goku who is Good never ever even once makes that choice onscreen outside of filler#and then they justify that choice by making Chi-Chi seem horrid and unreasonable for (checks notes) Not Wanting Her Child to Die#anyway I am once again being bitter about anime vs manga klasjdklasd#I can't believe I let the anime convince me I hated Goku man Goku's SUCH a good and ridiculous character in the manga#the anime just SUCKS at letting him be who he's always been#and has to reframe and recontextualize and reword everything he does so that it seems like he's Actually Quite Mature and Thoughtful nO#THAT's VEGETA YOU COWARDS#also the fact that bulma said she wouldn't live with him at the beginning of this arc to him casually hanging out with her and trunks#after cell beat his ass and humbled him is REALLY GOOD SUBTEXT for their shared relationship having improved without showing it#it's great subtext for all three of them and toei just went 'nah' and decided to make it a whole group shot so ...? Master Roshi could sit#and explain how ??? Tournaments Work??? Just so Cell could log on and also explain how tournaments work?? God it's been so long#since I've watched the anime and now when I do it just makes me mad aklsdjskja the manga is SOOOOO much better#there are some spots where the pacing is more ideal in the anime like goku turning ssj for the first time but like man. everything else is.#like why are you making Goku snarky with Vegeta dude his clapbacks are SO much funnier when they're just Tactless Honesty#like Vegeta's not insulted by Snark bitch he grew up in the Freeza force that man was raised by THE bitchiest drag queens#Vegeta's insulted by someone saying something deeply and insultingly True to his face as if it's the fucking weather#Goku in the anime is like 'a battle of wits hoho' but Goku's purity is part of the joke he's not snippy he's just got no social etiquette#He's just honest! He's not trying to be insulting. That's what MAKES it insulting! That's the WHOLE GAG of why Vegeta can't stand him#Goku is always just telling the truth and it's always the rudest shit Vegeta's ever heard in his life#'it's a sunny day! i'm way stronger than you! see you out there bud!' 10000% Genuinely Friendly. Golden Retriever-Ass Pure.#Infuriating. Hilarious.#anyway I looked at anime clips to make sure I remembered things right and that was a mistake#as someone who has a soft spot for it and grew up on it -- compared to the manga it's bad and it's always been bad#and toriyama was right to be disinterested in watching it jesus christ they BUTCHERED his work#anyway this has been another shot of haterade with sketches thank you for scrolling my rambletags askljdask#dbtag#i just truly can't get over how they make Vegeta call her 'woman' in the anime and he literally only ever calls her Bulma in the manga#except for on namek when he refers to her as 'the/that woman' because she is a complete stranger#why is he calling her woman like he's a 1940s american husband and not an extraterrestrial from a deeply advanced society toei
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shizunitis · 10 days
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I think half of this fandom got wife-beamed by Shen Yuan, any comments on this tumblr user Shizunitis?
i acknowledge no such events, myself. i don’t need some narrative device or convenient trope or genre convention or whatever to fall in love with shizun. i’m sure there are people out there whose affections needed some prompting or a helping had to get going, but. like. couldn’t be me.
it’s not about the wife beam. it’s not even about what i want from shizun, or in what light i see him, or what he’s done for me, or any of that. it’s the very core of him, the tangle of contradictions and avoidant, endearing paths he takes in his navigation of the world around him, how he clings to it and the people around while adamantly claiming he isn’t.
he fucks up, and he’s snarky, and he’s a bit out of pocket at times, and that’s the most endearing part of him. the acting and the self-reprobations and his own wisdom, which he always overlooks or bats away, and the fumbling and the way every one of his action betrays just how easily his mask can crumble the more he’s made to fight for what he cares for, and how at the end of the day between his own pride and the love guiding his every action, it’s always the pride that he discards first.
also, he’s got a case of rejection sensitivity that would, and does, put both binghe’s and mine to shame.
a wife beam is, in itself, a… filter? i’m not sure how to put it, but a wife beam is too… inauthentic. as the reader hitching a ride in shizun’s brain (which thinking about makes me feel faint and like i’m about to burst with joy and entirely not normal about the whole thing) it’s kind of… impossible, i wanna say, to be fooled by its effects in any meaningful way.
it’s like putting on glasses just a bit different from your own prescription (guess who’s sleep deprived and doesn’t know how to put words together again. you get no prize and you have to feel sorry for me)—the shapes are there, but the exact definition of what you see is not right. the “wife beam” is not doing justice to shizun’s true self.
shizun is shizun. shen yuan or shen yuan as shen qingqiu, whichever, it’s the core of him that matters, and the wife beam makes him seem too… ideal. too untouchable. it’s like cling film. bothersome and unhelpful outside very specific circumstances and we all know shizun doesn’t belong in the kitchen. where he belongs is for me to think about while laying on the floor at 10am on a friday.
or, put in another, more obnoxious way:
this here is a naturally occuring phenomenon; every binghe loves every shizun, and i’m not about to betray the cause or turn away from my nature.
rate this for coherence i give it a solid 6.5 right now. i did a great job, considering.
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hero-dualies-pog · 3 months
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i think i finally get all those “maybe we could do with a little less shipping in fandom. this is not a complaint but a cry for help” aromantic posts
#>be me#>aro#>find a piece of work that speaks to me deeply#>the character dynamics are fascinating and i want to see more of it#>check out the fandom#>half of it is shipping#>not only that but there is also a fuck ton of absolutely rancid ship discourse#>so shippers act like they are absolutely persecuted for shipping x ship#>see the absolutely batshit take of “seeing the characters as siblings is bad because they act toxic to each other-#obviously the better interpretation is toxic yaoi”#>also see the equally as bad take “these characters are BASICALLY BROTHERS and if you ship them IT’S BASICALLY INCEST”#>they are not canonically lovers nor siblings#>they just exist in the same space#>… why#>it’s like wanting to study bugs in a place with no bugs. so you import the bugs. like yeah it’s harmless but why did you go to the trouble#of bringing the bugs here when there aren’t any bugs and people aren’t here for bugs. instead of idk. going to a place with bugs??#>the shippers are complaining about how people hate their ship and there’s not enough of it (at least half of the fandom ships them)#>not a whole lot of people but a few hate on the ship and like 6x the amount of haters immediately start screaming at the haters#>the homestuck fandom handled this better. please guys#>people may not like your ship. block. move on#>people may ship something that you see as an absolute insult to the themes of the work. block. move on#>and like yeah i get that this is the singular ship in the entire fandom so there’s gonna be more of it#>but i am starving for purely platonic content. please.#>i do not want to continue having to willfully misinterpret romantic/familial content as platonic#>i’m going back to the “homestuck fandom handled this better” point actually#>like there is an honest to god blog called “this ship is better than davekat”#>and i can guarantee that if i tried to make an equivalent blog in this fandom i would be killed instantly#>generally it’s not a great place to be as a platonic relationships enjoyer which sucks because the canon material is cool as shit#>the only thing i can think of to do is wait like a year to see if this situation resolves itself#>and hope to god that there’s more platonic content by then
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some-pers0n · 1 year
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"All of the mercs would be homophobic and racist" NO THEY WOULDN'T!! You mean to tell me that nine mentally ill hired killers, all of which coming from a game that's hellbent on taking old and tired tropes and cliches and subverting them in new and funny ways, would just be generic bigoted people because of the time period??? My guy WHAT!?
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mutedeclipse · 4 months
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Btw If you cant handle them when theyre short you do not deserve them tall
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makedamnsvre · 9 months
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looking at some of these people online are making me think it should be legal and even encouraged for me to kill these people with hammers.
#i dont even know how to insult these people like at this point i just straight up think they dont deserve life LAWL#like. look in the comments on most instagram videos and tell me there is no such thing as a worthless human#someone has an exotic cat breed and in the video says that they would not recommend this cat breed to Anyone because#this cat is very high maintenance and constantly begs to be left outside and shows some clips on this guy walking the cat on a leash#in an obviously urban area and the comments are like 'i live on a farm and i always let my cats outside youre cruel for locking her up'#and this person is having to explain a trillion times that if they let her off leash outside that She Will Be Stolen.#justoh my god. did you not see where this guy lives ?? she will either get hit by a car drink antifreeze or get stolen. what even#and thats just a milder example of someone whos just kinda willfully ignorant and stupid. there is sososo much worse stuff#i cant even begin to explain just how much i want these people to get dropped in the middle of the pacific ocean and left to die#i just genuinely dont think there is hope for these people to be honest like. theres just no way to describe them other than stupid#but its worse than stupid its worse than willful ignorance it has to be at this point just some kind of purposeful pure malice#towards the concept of humanity . there is just no way to get that stupid and deeply genuinely maliciously ignorant on accident#i feel like there is just. genuine unintended ignorance and then theres just pure malice. honestly even if it isnt the effect is the same#i think they should get killed with hammers
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potatobugz · 11 months
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would you guys forgive me if i said that inosuke's english va sounds like muscle man
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twdgs · 2 months
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i’m lucky that all my art teachers are nice but at the same time i would like harsher criticism sometimes lol 😭
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unnamed-proxy · 3 months
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People that post art and in the comments are like “Art isn’t mine” “credit to the artist” or “idk who made it” make me sooo mad because like. If you didn’t make it, and you don’t know who made it, then just don’t post it??? You aren’t being forced, there are no spirits in your house threatening your bloodline and the only way to stop them is posting uncredited artwork. If you can’t or won’t respect an artist by crediting them; not posting the thing takes way less effort than posting it! Wow! Shocking!
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Haha, what are you talking about? Are you on drugs? Loser!
You know you have been a toxic and loser your whole life!
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Uhhh i have got you all figured out uh? Lmaoooooo you pressed lmaoooooo
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ghostfacd · 10 months
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SASSY MEN DO IT BETTER! | TOM BLYTH
PAIRING. tom blyth x fem!actress!reader
SUMMARY. in which yours and tom’s behind the scenes gossip session goes viral and everyone’s dying to know who’s it about
AUTHOR’S NOTE. thank you to whomever requested this, nonnie i love you! this was so much fun to write and instead of Instagram posts, I decided to do tweets this time! enjoy as always and thank you for the overwhelming support on my au, it means so so much
installment of this au (recommend reading for context)
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It started off innocent.
Just you and Tom in the background of a Behind The Scenes video where Rachel was currently talking about her character, Lucy Gray Baird.
You and Tom were fairly close in proximity—as you always were anyway—and you two were scrolling through your phones, showing each other funny videos or pictures of beautiful places that showed up on your feed.
That was until a message popped up from your ex, some jerk who had somehow gained a role in a movie and thought he was now some hotshot in the film industry.
“Oh seriously,” Tom mutters, watching as you tapped on the messages your ex had sent you. “He’s got to be kidding.”
Your ex had apparently “missed you greatly” and wanted to hang out so you two could catch up. He said he watched The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes and was in awe of how well you acted. If he wasn’t such a toxic asshole when you two were dating, you would take it as a compliment.
“I don’t know where he has the nerve.” Tom says, giving you a disgusted look. “Like girl, please.”
“Girl please?” You say, giggling as your head fell back into his chest. “Baby, I didn’t know you said things like that.”
“There’s plenty of more where that came from,” he says, “Okay, I need to stop. What if someone on set thinks I’m crazy?”
“They already think you’re crazy.”
Tom rolls his eyes, shoving your shoulder back slightly. “You’re lucky you’re my girlfriend.”
“I think you’re more of the girlfriend in the relationship Tom,” you say, shrugging. You fail to hold in your laugh as you watch Tom’s expression turn into shock. “I’m kidding, thank you for being the best boyfriend I can ask for.”
He grumbles a sure whatever under his breath when you engulf him in a tight hug.
“You’re practically crushing my lungs.” He says a minute in, only to be responded with a roll of your eye. “But hey, I’m much better than that newbie actor ex of yours, right?”
“Is that even a question?” You say, pulling away. “He was just nonchalant and mean to me half of the time. Don’t know why I even dated him.”
Your phone goes off, another message coming from your ex. “Oh, he called you knock off Draco Malfoy, which by the way, isn’t even an insult because he doesn’t even come close to you or Draco Malfoy in terms of looks.”
Tom lets out an honest to God laugh at your commentary, shaking his head in amusement. “Yeah, but didn’t you have a huge crush on Malfoy as a kid?”
You pretend to think for a minute before nodding your head teasingly, “yeah, I guess things never change huh?”
“Okay stop, you know I’m a fake blonde.”
And the entire moment between you and Tom is captured on camera, sending your fans into a frenzy as they watched how cute you two were with each other.
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stormte · 1 year
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I just accidentally sent my cousin the most ominous god damn message I’ve ever written 💀
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yanderenightmare · 14 days
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♡ TW: enemies to lovers, past bullying, reformed bully x victim
♡ fem reader
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“No way.” You shake your head—face warped in something akin to disgust. Judging him for even asking, glaring in disbelief at him and what dangles from the clothing hanger in his hand. He couldn't be serious.
“Come on, please, for me?” he pleads, downright pleads. But there’s no way.
“No.” You say more firmly, planting both hands on your tilted hips. “I don’t get what you’re thinking, but it’s not exactly a time in our lives I want to relive.”
He pouts and sags a little where he stands, clasping his hands together in prayer, making the ill-taste outfit swing. “Oh, come on, it won’t be the same as then,” he promises with zero believability backing him. He even dares smile as he spouts the bullshit in his next words, “It’ll be like therapy. Let’s reframe your trauma together.”
You scoff. He’s unbelievable. “You’re stupid.”
He feigns feeling insulted. “I’m serious!”
“You always said I looked like trash in that—no way I’m not putting it on,” you dismiss.
But then he gets down on his knees. Hands still together as if in worship. Looking up at you with puppy dog eyes. “I was lying through my teeth back then—you know that! I’ll be honest this time around. Tell you exactly how often I had to change my pants because of you—”
“Ew, stop.” You can’t believe the spectacle he’s creating—such a drama queen—and all for getting you to put on a make-shift copy of your old high-school uniform.
“Come one, pretty, pretty, pretty please?” He shuffles forward on his knees until he’s right by your feet—bottom lip jutting out in his pout. “The prettiest please?”
You look down at him—you mouth a prim pursed line, gritting your teeth to try and steal yourself. Grimacing at the outfit sprawled on his lap. There’s no way. Absolutely no way.
“Pretty please?” he continues, making you roll your eyes with a sigh.
“Fine,” you bite out but quickly add, “But you have to wear one, too.”
You think you’re being smart. But he only grins—a wicked little twinkle in his eye.
“Way ahead of you.”
From behind the outfit meant for you, he pulls forth a black gakuran to match.
Okay, so you hadn’t really thought he would have bought one for himself—you realize now the mistake in your speculation. Of course, he’d bought one for himself. But hold on… You raise your brow, folding your arms atop your chest. “And where’s the pants?”
“They didn’t have my size, but my sweats are already a good lookalike,” he explains away. “This doesn’t really fit either, but it won’t stay on for long, so’ doesn’t matter.”
He gets up and hastily pulls his shirt off of his head, then, with just as much enthusiasm, pulls the black school jacket on. And he’s right—his black sweatpants could pass for the old Tobi trousers he used to wear. All in all, it’s a sight for sore eyes. Looking at him feels just short of seeing his old high-school self.
“Come on. You said.” He holds out the rendition of your old uniform. “Get dressed.”
You regret conceding. But it’s too late to go back on your word now. Rolling your eyes, you receive the hanger with a sigh, “Oh, fine. Just this once, you freak.”
You get dressed without making much of a show. Leaving your current comfy outfit in an unceremonious pile, you pull the tacky articles on hastily. Black pleated skirt and sailor blouse with a little red bow sash—there’s even a pair of knee-high socks to go with it. As a grown-up, it’s utterly humiliating having to wear it now.
But he doesn’t seem to share your discomfort. Only groaning, “Damn. There she is—my prettiest little junior~”
You ball your skirt in your fists. Glancing up at him only to look down again, fixing your gaze to the floor. Heat in your face. Mumbling, “This is weird—you look dumb.”
“Oh yeah?” his voice curls with newfound enjoyment. “Well, you don’t look a day older.”
He comes closer, and oh god—you don’t know why you’re so nervous. But fuck—you feel like your back in time—back in time when you were a sorry loser getting picked on, and he was… he was a—
“Perv,” you manage to say. Though, that’s not really the word you’d been thinking.
He chuckles, so close now that he also starts to play with the hem of your skirt. “That’s for damn sure.” Agreeing, he hums, “Only for you though. So’s fine.”
He bends down and finds your neck with his tongue and teeth—his hand traveling up under your skirt without further ado.
“Hey,” you protest, wringing his ill-fitting jacket in both fists, hauling him off. And even though it makes him look back at you like a kicked puppy, you don’t let it get to you as you scold him, “Thought we were reframing my trauma. At this rate, you’re just itching to make me relive it.”
He tries giving you one of his innocent smiles. “Oh?” His arms curl around your waist, pulling you close—chest to chest—simpering while leering down at you, voice in a purr, “It won’t be any fun if I can’t bully you a little bit like I used to.”
He tries leaning down to catch your lips, but you push him away. Breaking free, then scoffing, “Tch, if that’s how you’re gonna play this, then have fun beating off on your own.”
“But—” He starts, but you’re already on your way to leave the room. Hooking two fingers into the band of your skirt, he stops you and spins you back, now all mopey and sorry, “I’m sorry, don’t go, princess—how about we one-eighty it, and I tell you all the reasons I love you? Will that make you humor me?”
He’s back to pleading.
And you can’t help the small smile it gives you. Muttering, “Maybe.”
He smiles giddily, too, “I love how pouty you can be sometimes.”
Your brows furrow, “Hey!” That’s not a compliment.
But he only laughs and continues, “And I love your snippy little tsundere attitude.”
“Those are both insults, you tit—” you argue, but he doesn’t care, hugging you close, lifting you off your feet before falling with you down on the bed. Hanging over you, he admires every inch of your perfect body tucked into that cute little uniform he used to make fun of because he was scared of how silly you made him feel.
“I love how you tell me off.”
Deciding to face his fears was the best decision he’d ever made.
“I love how you look at me.”
It’s crazy to think you’re here with him still, after all these years.
“I love how you put up with me, how you make all my wishes come true—how, even though I don’t deserve you, you stay with me anyway—how you’re mine even though I’m a scumbag.”
You’re eyes soften under his speech. For all his tactlessness, he can also be really quite sweet. You raise both hands, reaching out to cup his face—beholding the softness in his eyes—that way he looks at you. It makes your chest stir.
“You’re not that bad,” you confess, pulling him down to tease his lips with yours.
Kissing you once, he accredits you, “That’s ‘cause you make me a better man.”
You smile and kiss him again, then resume your teasing, “Don't get ahead of yourself. You’re still a boy.”
He lifts and raises a brow down at you in retaliation, “Is that so?” And oh no, you recognize that look.
“Well, this boy is feeling hormonal and horny and just raring to go—” he overplays. Gasping, “And what do you know? How lucky!” He lowers himself again, then starts peppering kisses all over your face in between words, “I’ve got this perfect little high-school sweetheart lying here all up for the taking—”
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♡ BNHA – Hawks, Dabi, Bakugou, ♡ JJK – Gojo, really silly in-love Sukuna ♡ HQ – Kuro, Atsumu ♡ AOT – Eren ♡ DS – Sanemi ♡ WB – Suo, Togame
♡ FEM x M INSERT masterlist ♡ GN x M INSERT masterlist
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prinzessinpluto · 2 years
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the one movie franchise that's even worse than marvel (specifically the avengers) it transformers btw. I want to hunt down michael bay and release a bunch of Film Bros upon him.
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envy-of-the-apple · 6 months
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Center of Attention
Dark! Geto Suguru x reader x Dark! Gojo Satoru
5.6k wc
Synopsis: Your boyfriend cheats on you with his best friend
(Warnings: rape/noncon, cheating, infidelity, forced relationships, piv sex, oral sex, afab reader)
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In the beginning, things with Suguru were great. 
He was nice, considerate, sweet. Down to earth, honest. You'd only been official for a few months, but it felt real. Like it could last forever. 
And then, he introduced you to Satoru. 
It started from there. You hated everything about that man. He came from money and drove in loud, fancy cars. He was vapid and insulting. The way he behaved with you was just as disgusting. Calling you pet names like 'princess' and 'baby'. Touching your waist, your arm, your ass. Suguru once said they shared everything together. You were starting to wonder if Satoru thought you were on the table as well. 
It started a lot of arguments between you and Suguru. He'd always defend his childhood friend, barely even listening to your protests. It's just his nature, he doesn't do it on purpose, he does it with everyone. With how defensive he was about his best friend, you should have known. You should have seen the signs. 
Maybe then you would have been less surprised when you walked in on the two making out. 
You'd left Suguru's house after the last fight you had with him, once again about Satoru. You were halfway home when something like guilt spread across your body. Doubt. Maybe you were being too harsh on them. They were childhood friends. They'd always have a connection you just wouldn't be able to understand. 
You had come back with a bag of take out-an apology- on your wrists. You didn't think anything of it when the front door was unlocked, Suguru's clothes on the ground. 
They were on the couch, half-naked. Satoru was pressing his precious best friend further into the cushion. Suguru's hand was in his white hair, aggressively pulling. You could feel your heart breaking with every second. Every breath you took. 
"Suguru...?" They froze. 
It was your fault. You should have been faster. 
The food you'd brought drops to the floor as you turn, ready to bolt out the door, run to your car, drive far far away and just forget this shitty night. Satoru is faster. His slender hand wraps around your waist, pulling you back. 
"Wait. Just wait," he begs, his voice uncharacteristically desperate. Given any other situation, you would have laughed, but the tears were already streaming down your face. You can only stare at the empty couch, where those two had just been. Where you can see your cotton pink panties. 
God, this is all one sick joke, isn't it?
Suguru calls your name, but you don't bother to look. Satoru's grip is strong, and you're forced to wither just a foot away from the two of them. You feel everything. Humiliation. Heartbreak. Anger. 
You slap away the hand that tries to cup your cheek. It's all it takes to snap you back.
"Don't touch me." Through your tears, you try to wrestle your way out of Satoru's grip. 
"Let me go," you demand, your throat threatening to close, "Satoru let-let me fucking go—" 
"Not until you let us explain," Suguru begs. By now, Satoru had cornered you against the wall, and you feel yourself crying even harder because you don't want an explanation, you know what you fucking saw. 
"Jesus Christ-what could you possibly say that can-that can explain anything!" Your voice is too shrill, too high, too emotional, you need to bring yourself down but you just can't. It's so much. You need to leave.
"Satoru and I love each other." 
Your voice halts in your chest as you look up. Suguru's eyes are somber as he gazes at you. You want to stop yourself from examining him. The unruffled clothes, the dark hickeys on his neck. For some reason, the evidence breaks you more than the action. 
"We always have," he continues like he's talking about the weather. He was always the logical one, "Ever since we were teenagers." 
"Great," you respond, voice too damp to signify any real sarcasm, "how touching. Then just—" 
"—But it wasn't enough," Satoru rushes in, quick to cut you off. "We—we weren't complete. Like we would never have the right time....and then we met you." 
You don't like adoration in his eyes, like he wasn't just about to fuck your now ex-boyfriend. Disgust fills your stomach as you continue to glare at him. You hate him. You hate them both. 
"The first time Suguru brought you home, I knew you were the one for us," Satoru says. "You-you're our missing puzzle piece—what we've been looking for our entire life." He's good with words. He's a little like Suguru, in that sense. Maybe they do deserve each other. 
You can only stare at him, and then your eyes shift to Suguru. He has the same expression, though a little less obvious. Despite how much your heart hurts, a disbelieved laugh chokes out of your throat. 
"...that's your excuse?" you whisper, "you wanted a fucking threesome?" 
"It's not an excuse." Suguru steps forward, now they both are fully trapping you. His voice is soaking with emotion, almost like he was about to start crying. 
"It's the truth. I love you. We love you, and we want you to be with us." 
You couldn't believe them. You couldn't fucking believe them. It was all too much. The argument, the kiss. This, them cornering you and claiming that they love you. It was the first time Suguru had told you that he loved you. You thought you would have been happy to hear those words come from his mouth, given enough time together. 
Now, it just feels like another nail in the coffin. 
You look down, looking at the spilled food. You'd brought curry. It was currently all over the bare floor, leaking into cracks. Good. You hoped when you left and cried your heart out, Suguru would be here, cleaning up your mess. You wouldn't be able to hurt him as badly as he did you, but at least you'd be able to make him miserable. 
"I want to go home," you finally say. You pull at Satoru's hand. He doesn't budge. "I want to leave. Let me leave." 
He doesn't reply. His grip gets tighter, almost crushing. You stumble when he pulls you forward, nearly crashing into his chest. When you look up, he looks....wrong. Off, in some way. 
"You can't." His sunglasses are off. You can see his eyes. They're too wide, too manic. It scares you. "We—we just told you that we loved you. I love you. You—you can't just leave me—" 
“Let go, Satoru.” 
Satoru stops rambling, looking over at the other man. Suguru steps even closer. His hand reaches up, touching your hair. You don’t slap him away again, but you flinch. His frown deepens. You hate the look of hurt in his eyes, like he’s the victim here, like he spent months with someone who was just stringing them along. 
“You need time,” Suguru says, more to himself than you, “we get that. We’ll give you time. And then, you can come back to us.” You should snap at the blistering hope in his voice, but you don't. You grit your teeth, holding everything in until you're finally away from them. 
He steps back. Satoru doesn’t. His teeth mash together, jaw clenching like he wants to argue. Fight. 
Suguru’s eyes darken. “Let go, Satoru.” 
Slowly, you can feel his grip on your wrist loosen. You react, stumbling back, hands desperately gripping on the door. You can feel their eyes on you the entire time. 
You can give yourself credit, however. You don’t break into sobs until you get into your car. 
Two months later, and you still refuse to see them. 
It's not like they haven't tried to get in touch, much to your disdain. They called and texted and spammed until you blocked them. Then, you blocked them on social media. At work, you ask the secretary to start dumping the bouquets instead of sending them up to you. And you have to tell your mutual friends to stop trying to act like the middle-man. 
You can't do anything about the letters or the gifts left at your door every other day. Ignoring the full mailbox becomes customary, and you start passing off the chocolates to your neighbors and friends. 
"Can't you get them to stop?" You ask Shoko as she rummages through another gift basket they had sent, "seriously, I'm close to snapping here." 
"Oh, this looks expensive." She eyes the wine bottle. When you give her a look, she sighs. 
"You know I can't do that. Whenever they get obsessed, they don't take no for an answer. Maybe that's why they have such a great relationship." You wilt at that. 
"Did you know?" 
Her fingers twitch in a way that makes you know she's craving a cigarette. 
"I mean, I knew they had a thing for each other back in high school, but I thought it faded." You sink your face further into your hands. "Trust me, I wasn't in on whatever bullshit they did to you." 
Her fingers reach over to squeeze your thigh, a way of apologizing. You give her a timid smile, before ultimately sighing again. Her hands move to your back. You feel the urge to cry in her chest again, but you've been doing that for days now.
"Just keep doing what you're doing. Ignore them, and hopefully, those assholes will focus on something else." Shoko suggests. She shifts closer. You can smell her perfume. 
You nod. "Yeah, hopefully." 
Eventually, the gifts start to dwindle. The flowers stop coming, the gift baskets get more and more sporadic. Two months later, everything stops, and you're nearly crying in relief. By now, you're mostly over whatever you had with Suguru. You two hadn't been together for very long. Now that you think about it, the whole situation was more embarrassing than anything else. And the fact they both had the audacity to lovebomb you too? Humiliating. All you want to do is never see him again. Him or Satoru. In your eyes, they can both just fall off the face of the Earth and you'd be all the more happier for it. 
The date was nice. Cute, was the word you'd use. A nice dinner and peaceful conversation. And he wasn't that bad to look at. A nice smile. Dimples, you noted when he laughed at something you'd said. 
"I'd like to see you again." He said, right before you let yourself out of the car. 
You glanced back at him. And you stay there when he leans closer. The kiss was nice, too. 
You're giddy the entire short walk to your apartment. It fades just when you reach the door. 
Their arms are crossed, and it strangely feels like you're coming home to two disapproving parents. Satoru is leaning against a wall, sunglasses tucked underneath his collar. Suguru holds something in his hands—another bouquet. 
Your excitement fades, but secretly, you're relieved. You don't feel the remnants of your heart shattering the more you look at them. You feel....nothing. 
Nothing but the slight irritation that they were blocking your door. 
"Welcome back." Suguru starts, but Satoru is much less tactful. 
"Who was that?" He demands, but the car has already left. Thank god you would want to bring a man you'd barely met into your drama. 
None of your business, you want to snap, but it's too late for either of their bullshit. 
"No one," you say and their glowers only grow that more intense. 
"Can this wait until tomorrow?" you finally ask, "I'm exhausted." Satoru seems to get even more pissed at your comment, but Suguru steps in. 
"You haven't been answering my calls," Suguru starts, "and you haven't accepted any of our gifts. We're just worried about you." 
That's rich, coming from him. You can't help but let your irritation control you, at least for a little while. Just because you were over him, doesn't mean you were fine with what he did. 
"Sorry, but you lost the privilege to 'worry about me' when you started sucking your boyfriend's dick," you mention to Satoru, who stiffens, "Speaking off, was he the mistress here, or was I? How long had you two been doing it behind my back, anyway? Or is it technically not considered cheating because you said 'no homo' before making out." 
"I'm sorry," Suguru says, and to his credit, he sounds remorseful, "there's not a single day that goes by where I'm not regretful at how you found out." 
"Oh my God, absolutely not. You don't get to apologize to me to clear your conscience." You're hissing. "What? Do you expect me to give you and Satoru my blessings or something? Fuck off before I start throwing my shoes at you." 
"Would that make you feel better?" Satoru cuts in. "You can hurt us if you want to, baby. What—what do you want us to do?" He steps forward. You step back. "We can get on our knees, and you can punch us. Hit us. Wanna smash beer bottles on our faces? Anything, baby. We want you to forgive us." 
His sincerity takes you off guard. His eyes were wide. He was serious about what he just said. For a moment, you felt bad for Suguru. He was stuck with that. And then you processed Satoru's words. 
"Forgiveness?" You spit out. "You have to be fucking with me because there's no way in hell I'd ever forgive you. Do you know the worst part about this entire shitshow, Suguru? It wasn't the fact that you broke my heart, it was that everyone except me knew that my boyfriend was sucking his best friend's dick. Do you know how humiliating that was? Of course you didn't because you two were so busy thinking about each other that you didn't even think how it would affect me." 
By the time you were done, you were panting. You bit your lip, forcing the hint of tears back because if you broke, it would negate everything you had just said. Despite the tremor in your voice, it felt good to yell at them finally. The look on their faces made the cake that much sweeter. 
"Now, fuck off," your voice was quieter, almost hoarse, "leave me alone." 
They don't stop you when you reach your door. You can barely stop your hands from shaking, and you know you won't be able to hold yourself together for much longer. The door unlocks with a click. 
And then you're stumbling through your home with an added weight on your back. 
You almost fall into the carpet, quick to balance yourself and whirl around. They're already inside. Suguru is shaking his head while Satoru fiddles with the door. 
"Satoru—" Suguru starts. 
"Enough." He hisses. "We've tried doing it your way, and look where it got us. My way, now." The lock clicks into place. 
Suguru looks like he wants to disagree, but he holds himself back. He frowns, glancing over to you. 
"You're right," he says, "maybe actions are better than words." 
Something like fear pushes its way into your throat, but you're waving it away. You immediately reject the sudden increased thumping in your heart. This is Satoru and Suguru. Assholes. They are selfish bastards who care about nothing but themselves. But they wouldn't hurt you. They wouldn't do that to you. 
Right? 
You're certain of it. You know it, yet your voice falters the first time you try to speak up. 
"...What are you doing?" 
You can't keep the anger. It's gone, as much as you try to pull it back inside your chest, keeping it there. Instead of hot, you just feel cold. 
You don't like the way they're slowly inching towards you, like you're a scared feral animal—like they're hunters itching for a taste. 
Despite your clear discomfort, Satoru still has the audacity to smile. Not his usual grin, filled with unabashed confidence, this one is warmer. Nicer.
You think it makes what he's doing worse.
"I'm so sorry, baby," he sounds like he's begging, voice low, simpering, "I never wanted to hurt you. I promise." 
"What are you doing?" You demand again, but your voice wavers even more. 
"I get it. I get why you're so upset with us. You just felt left out, right?" Satoru's saying, and you should be getting angry at his words, but the way he isn't stopping is getting more and more concerning and something is wrong, they aren't leaving, why aren't they leaving?
"Just let us show you how sorry we are, how much we care," Suguru says, "Everything. All for you. I promise." 
"Get out," you're whispering, and it hope it has more bite than you can possibly give, "just get out. Leave me alone—" 
Satoru grabs you. You manage to scream before his lips crush into yours. The kiss isn't anything the way Suguru used to kiss you. Gentle, soft, giving, never taking. Satoru was all strength. The strongest. He pulled, and nipped, and bit until it wasn't even a kiss. It was just you being devoured by him. 
You push away (he lets you), but before you can suck in a breath, Suguru's there, grabbing the back of your neck. The kiss is less painful, but just as searing. Especially considering you've kissed him before, back when things were innocent, much less twisted. 
"See, Suguru?" Satoru whispers when the dark-haired man pulls away. "So much quieter, now. You just wanted all our attention, right baby?" 
You can't speak, not when you can barely breathe. You're pushing again, struggling to get out of their hold, but you are nothing against Satoru. You are nothing against Suguru. 
What are you when it's both of them at once? 
You mumble about a quiet 'get the fuck out'. It's too shaky to be anything intimidating. They both have the audacity to laugh in a way that makes you feel like a tiny kitten clawing at their owner's hands, desperate not to sink into the warm, soapy water. 
It's easy to manhandle you onto the couch, Suguru keeping you nice and pliant as Satoru fiddles with your pants. Suguru hushes you, like you were just playing around. Playing hard to get. Like the sobs and the tears and the tearful begs aren't enough to prove anything coherent. 
"Stop," you say anyway because there's a chance, there's always a chance, "Suguru—Satoru stop. What—what are you doing? Please just—" 
Suguru bites your neck, making you yelp. He apologizes with a warm tongue, ignoring you and glaring down at his companion. 
"Hurry up." It sounds impatient. "You wanted a taste, right?" 
Satoru clicks his tongue and they're both ignoring you, as if your opinion, your struggles, your screams is just background noise, nothing truly important. Your pants are already down at your legs, preventing you from kicking. Satoru's large hands squeeze at the fat of your thighs, and you jump as his cold hands brush over your sensitive skin. 
Your voice is muffled by Suguru's lips once again. The man moans into your mouth, loud and lewd. 
"I'm savoring this," Satoru says while you're distracted.
He pushes two fingers into your clothed cunt, shuddering at the touch. "You touched this pussy all the time. Can't say the same. Cut me some slack, man." 
Suguru reluctantly pulls away, leaving you panted and slightly breathless. He says something to Satoru, chiding. Satoru bickers back. You can only come back when you dazedly look down just in time to see Satoru push your panties to the side and attach his mouth to your pussy. 
You're not wet. How could you be? Satoru remedies that, eagerly licking until your hole is covered by his saliva. Your recent inactivity doesn't help either. You hadn't done anything, not since Suguru. Your body is starved for attention, something Satoru is readily giving. You become wet and needy in no time. 
Not one to be ignored, Suguru pulls your shirt over your head, abandoning it somewhere behind the couch. Your arms are useless, barely catching onto his wrist before he's forcing you away. Suguru's head dips down, running his tongue over the skin at your breasts, eager for a taste. He bites at one of your nipples, groaning when your hands reach up to wildly tug at his hair. Your actions seem only to excite him further as he squeezes your other breast, digging his fingers into your soft flesh. 
On the floor, Satoru is having more than enough of his fill. You aren't prepared to feel the long finger prodding your hole before easing its way inside your tight pussy. You give a faltering whimper, arching your back. Suguru pulls away from your chest with a pop. 
You're sobbing now. It doesn't prove anything, considering each sob is interrupted by a reluctant moan. Suguru leans up to kiss you. You squeeze your eyes, turning away. His lips brush your cheek. He chuckles at your act of defiance. 
"So cute," he says against your skin. Butterfly kisses across your cheek, your neck. "I missed this. I missed you." 
The words hurt, cut into your skin, enough to make you bleed. You cry harder. They are kind enough to let you. 
"Did you miss me too?" Suguru asks. When you give no answer, he laughs affectionately. 
He's unbuckling his belt as he traces more kisses across your skin. Suguru pushes away the hem of his pants, untucking his cock. You can feel its length press against your side. 
Below you, Satoru grabs you by the hips, adjusting you further down the couch until the new angle makes his fingers hit something deep inside of you. You gasp, eyes flying open. 
"Look at him," Suguru says, taking your chin, pointing your gaze down, "Isn't he so pretty?" 
Blue eyes stare back up at you, clouded with lust and need. You can't help but stare back through your tears. You've never noticed how beautiful Satoru's eyes were. They were always covered, obscured by his glasses. They're so pretty. Like oceans, merged with a starry sky. They're so beautiful. He's so beautiful. How could someone so beautiful do this to you?
"He wanted to do this for so long," Suguru murmurs into your ear, "would not shut up about eating you out, making you cum down his throat. Sit on his face until he passes out." 
Satoru says something, it sounds irritated, muffled by the slick sounds of your pussy. In response, Suguru grabs the back of his head, shoving him deeper between your thighs, keeping him there. You jolt at the sudden intimacy, another whine melting out your throat. Satoru seems to forget whatever he was saying, going back to worshipping your battered pussy.  
"If we're lucky, he'll suffocate down there," Suguru says with no real heat in his voice, "though I think he might like that idea." 
His voice is heavy, like he'd been running. Suguru grabs your hand, enveloping it in his own. The same hand that was touching his throbbing cock. When you try to jolt away, he doesn't let you, trapping your fingers underneath his own. 
"C'mon baby." He says through gritted teeth. You squeeze your eyes again, turning away into your shoulder. Suguru doesn't let you run away, not this time. He's quick to make himself known, scrapping his teeth against your neck. He moves yours and his hands up and down his leaking cock. 
"There we go." He sounds relieved. "That's it. So so good for me." 
You let him. You let them. You lie there like a doll, letting them maneuver you as they wish. Satoru's the loudest, moaning against your pussy, sucking on your clit. Suguru is more refined, shuddering into the crook of your neck as he forces you to grip his cock tighter and tighter. 
"Stop." It's nothing more than a pleading whimper. "Please please stop." 
Suguru kisses you again, sloppy and messy, just as Satoru sucks on your clit, hard enough to make you see white. You come right on his tongue and fingers, riding out your high. Against your will, your back arches, rising off the couch with a high-pitched keen. Your thighs squeeze around his head, threatening to crush his skull. He's more than happy to let you. 
Suguru follows right after, you can feel his cum coat your hand. Sticky, making you feel even more disgusted with yourself than you already were. 
You slump into the couch just as Satoru pulls away. Suguru tucks you into your chest, but you don't care enough to struggle. You can only watch as Satoru rises from his place on the floor, locking eyes with Suguru. 
"So?" Suguru asks, still panting, but there's a smile in his voice, "How was it?" 
There's something carnivorous in Satoru's eyes before he lunges. He aggressively kisses Suguru, and the latter returns the affection just as potently. Numbly, you realize that they were softer kissing you. They were holding back. Now, they go together like wild dogs, teeth clashing together. When they part, Satoru's lips are bleeding. 
Satoru turns his gaze on you. You avert your eyes, not wanting to bait the unpredictable animal. Luckily, his earlier inhibitions had been sated by the kiss. He falls on top of you two, burying his head into the crook of your neck, where Suguru has turned your skin into a patchwork of hickeys. 
"Fuck baby," he sighs into your skin, "you're an addiction, y'know that?" 
You focus on breathing. In and out, filling your lungs with much-needed oxygen. It works to keep you from processing the absolute awe in Satoru's voice. The sincerity. The adoration. So so much worse had he just been mocking. The way he usually was. 
But it was over now. It can't be anything more. You'd go insane if it were anything more-- 
"Now, I don't think it's fair anymore," Suguru's sighing into your ear, "you had a taste, right? Let me have a turn now." 
He's about to stand, but Satoru's placing a large hand on his chest, forcing him back on the couch. 
"Sit the fuck down." He spits out in irritation. "You're so greedy, y'know that? I'm fucking this pussy first, just like we agreed on." 
You can feel your breath hitch at that. The way they just stripped you down of your humanity. Like you were a toy, two toddlers were fighting over. It was horrifying. You can feel nausea build up in your throat. 
Suguru notices your distress first. He sighs, nuzzling his face into your cheek. 
"Okay okay, I yield," he relents, "don't start throwing a tantrum just because you don't get your way. Today is supposed to be about someone else, remember?" 
Satoru huffs, but he calms down significantly. He pulls away, you can feel his hands trail again your chest, like he's eager to put his mouth on something else, before he's stopping himself. 
By now, your fight has been sucessfully withered out by these two men. As though you ever had a chance, even in the beginning. Even if Suguru's threatening grip hadn't been present, even if the crazed look in Satoru's eyes wouldn't have manifested through his touch, this result would have always happened. 
Even then, you still squeeze your eyes shut when you hear the clanking of his belt. Your eyes sting again, and you tuck your face into the comfort of the fluffy cushions. 
Your thighs are clamped shut. Satoru easily plies them apart, sliding his way between your legs. Something hot and blunt lightly brushes against your entrance before he eases his cock into your pussy with one smooth motion. 
Despite the previous orgasm, it's not enough to obscure the pain. He's too long, and you're certain you could feel him right to your stomach. He curses a stuttered moan. 
It's useless, but you're reaching up anyway. Nails close to his face. Maybe your true goal is for his two beautiful eyes, ripping them apart, eager to see blue turn into red.
You don't get the chance to find out for yourself. Suguru's stopping you, restricting your body with his own. There's a punishing bite right on your neck. You yelp. Suguru grins through the blood. 
"Be good." He chastises. "Behave. We aren't hurting you, right? We're making you feel good." 
He's wrong. They have hurt you. They are hurting you. You feel it in your neck, the aching bruises, your battered cunt. It's everywhere. 
It hurts even more when Satoru doesn't even give you time to adjust. He's blabbering something; you can't hear through the blood between your ears as he collapses into your chest. The position is awkward, considering Suguru is still sucking on your neck, but never mind. They don't care if they suffocate you. 
The rhythm is rough and deep. He pushes his cock as deep as it can go inside of you, stretching your walls before he pulls back, only to restart the terrible cycle all over again. It's horrible. Excruciating, despite how slick your pussy is. Despite it all, you can't help but compare how differently Suguru and Satoru fucked you. 
Suguru's cock was thicker but wasn't as long. He was nicer, slow, only going when he knew you could take it. But back then, you didn't know Suguru's true intentions. You weren't aware of his sadism, the eagerness to rip you apart. Perhaps he was even worse than Satoru was. 
"Doesn't this feel good?" Suguru asks suddenly. His soft lips brush your cheek when you bury your face deeper into your couch. At least this time, he wasn't forcing you to face your unwanted assault head-on. You suppose you should feel grateful. 
But he's right. You hate that he's right. You get used to Satoru's rhythm eventually. When his cock brushes against something deep inside of you, you jolt around his dick, unable to stop yourself from squeezing your walls. Satoru hisses at that, but he barely falters. 
"Fuck fuck fuck," he's hissing, "squeezin' me so tight, gorgeous." 
He gropes at your tits, trying to give himself a reprieve from the sensation. You mirror him, squeezing your hands into fists, nails threatening to break skin. As if to comfort you, Suguru murmurs sweet nothings into your ear. 
Satoru's rhythm starts to falter. His breath hitches, indicating what's to come. His hands squeeze. His pace gets even rougher. Suguru frowns when you give a wilted moan, more pained than anything. 
"Satoru," he says, almost lecturing, "be nicer." 
When Satoru doesn't respond, Suguru is quick to retaliate. You flinch when he grabs Satoru's hair, yanking him away from your chest. Satoru whimpers. 
"'Can't help it—fuck, so fucking good." His voice is high and needy, juxtapositioning the crude way he's fucking himself into you, the way he's hiking a leg over his hip, driving himself even deeper inside your cunt. He starts drawing quick messy circles around your swollen clit. 
The angle proves to be enough to push you over the edge. You seize around his cock, spamming around him. Despite the harsh grip Suguru has on him, Satoru is quick to follow. He grits his teeth before something hot and horrible fills you. 
You stay like that, heaving in deep breaths. Satoru's breathing is labored too. He laughs, it sounds exhausted. You're helpless to do anything but comply when he grabs your chin to kiss you. It's messy, but not as rough as it was earlier. You're too exhausted to hate it. 
His cock slips out of you. His cum slips out, too, running down your thighs. You should be worried about it staining the carpet, but you're too out of it to think of anything. Suguru brushes Satoru's hair, looking satisfied. When Satoru has his fill of your lips, he pulls away. You catch his eyes. There's no unsatiable lust within them. Just warmth, as well as another emotion that makes you want to hurl. 
But it's over. It's finally over. It's the only part that keeps you from breaking apart. They'll leave. Leave you to cry in a corner while you pick up the pieces that were once you. 
Satoru tucks himself back in his pants. Suguru exhales in contentedness before he, too, rises from the couch. You wait for them to leave. 
They don't leave. 
With horrible gentleness, Suguru picks you up, corralling you into his chest. You whine when he moves your body, but you don't do much else. You can't. 
They share a laugh at your expense before he's carrying your broken, naked body up to the bedroom. It parallels the times when you were too tired to walk to the bedroom yourself. When Suguru was just a man you thought you could love. When you felt safe in his arms. 
Now you feel nothing but cold, despite how warm his hands are. 
He deposits you in the bed. Satoru comes up behind him, pulling an oversized shirt over your head. Their hands are uninterested in your body, working in tandem. 
The don't leave. 
You feel dirty and sticky. You're aching all over. You want to do nothing more but curl up in the hot shower and cry. They prevent that luxury from you too. The bed isn't big enough for all three of you, but they manage regardless. Satoru curls around you, sliding a hand across your back, bringing your face into your chest. You can feel Suguru settle in behind you, draping his hand across your waist. 
Someone kisses your temple. Someone yawns. 
They don't leave. 
You don't want to sleep. You feel like if you do you might not ever wake up from this nightmare. But your eyes are getting heavy, and for even a couple hours, you want to escape from thinking and hurting. 
"Isn't this nice?" Suguru says from behind, burying his face into your hair, he inhales deeply. 
"It'll always be like this from now on." He sounded relieved. Satoru hums in agreement. 
"All for you, baby," Satoru promises again, curling his hands tighter, "We're all for you."
Your heart drops to your stomach. 
That's what you were afraid of. 
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