#and he basically just told me I don't even need a direction to head yet

[girlscience]

the adrenaline rush after talking to someone who gives you severe anxiety but the conversation went super well and was super helpful: unparalleled

[dadsbongos]

cycle & jerk

5k words / warnings - pinv sex (unprotected, creampies), breeding kink, light choking, hair pulling, chilchuck's a mean dirty old man, heat cycle, i haven't written in awhile so like. idk don't execute me if this isn't a slay

summary - you are a rat-half foot-hybrid mix, king of the junjile but still social and fierce, and you go into heat and chilchuck can smell it (ew) and he's the only one that can help

~~~

Huffy panting causes Chilchuck to stir in his bedroll. A whine muffled into thin fluff, then the gentle drag of scratchy blankets catching on clothes as a lump grows more apparent beside him. Shyly, a hand wanders from clutching his arm to petting down his chest -- pausing at his belt and scrunching his shirt with a hearty groan. He watches quietly, heart thumping into his chest because he’s just not sure how to breach this.

Stupidly he’d assumed he still had more time. Looking back, he’s genuinely unsure as to why he ever thought that. The signs were there that tonight was his culling, weren’t they? He should’ve been more prepared.

four days prior.

Despite only servicing a single party in your entire adventuring career (and only wanting the one), you have a very strict set of dates in which you’re unavailable for work. Yet this month, regardless of his numerous efforts, your party leader has kept you in the dungeon past expiration.

“I told you I needed out of here before today, didn’t I?”

“You did…”

“And where am I?”

“Still here…”

To his credit, Laios appears earnestly ashamed -- hands folded in his lap and head bent to avoid looking you in the eye. He murmurs soft apologies, even as your attention is called across the room by Marcille.

“Take it easy,” she coos, which only infuriates you further, “What’s so important that you have to be so mad, anyway?”

“It’s basic decency,” you throw an arm out at your side, gesturing to your fellow half-foot on the right, “Chilchuck, back me up!”

“She’s right,” Chilchuck shrugs, “Although it sounds unfair to put all the blame on Laios.”

“I can’t leave before we’re done here,” you grumble, swiveling to face him fully (Laios sighs in gratitude that your wrath has been directed elsewhere), “I don’t get paid upfront, you know?”

“Huh, wonder if there was some way you could’ve fixed that.”

“I only work with Laios, why would I need to join a union?”

“Scab,” he coughs, far more teasing than of genuine frustration.

“Maybe we could help get you back to the surface if you told us what the problem was!” Marcille rolls around onto her hands, eyes wide in curiosity, “C’mon, share! Light a fire under us!”

“It’s embarrassing,” you scooch closer to Chilchuck before sagging against the wall, joining him on the ground. You fail to notice when he flinches at your proximity, “My business is my own.”

“Best leave it alone,” Senshi agrees, “We’ll just have to stay outta your way ‘til we’re done here.”

“Well, don’t avoid me,” you continue to scoff, watching as Izutsumi rustles along Chilchuck’s lap just to bat at your rounded ears with both paws, “Izutsumi, don’t touch those.”

She hisses quietly, only diverting her attention so far as your tail sandwiched between yours and Chilchuck’s thighs. You allow her to malleate the flesh, only because she makes no off-hand comments about how strangely cool the skin is (just the memory makes you glare over at Laios again, who cowardly shrinks back).

“You’re irritable today,” Chilchuck glances at you warily, tone equally cautious.

“And?”

His back slides down the wall until he’s nestled fully into his bedroll and turned away from you onto his side, “Nothing.”

Izutsumi hums quietly, head plopping into your lap, you two exchange confused glances before collectively deciding to let his sudden retirement go.

Since that night, Chilchuck has been avoiding you. You’re certain.

Initially, you’d attempted to rationalize it as a sense of hysteria, that you were simply hyper aware of his presence after the incident shared with Izutsumi. Until more incidents began compiling atop each other, and you were unable to pass them as individual misunderstandings.

Such as that next morning.

“Oh, you getting water?” Chilchuck rose from his slump against the far wall, gaze honed on Laios.

Your leader nods before thumbing towards you, “Yep. Found a small fountain across the hall. Wanna come?”

Chilchuck looks at you, blinking stupidly, before shaking his head, “I’ll probably wait until we set camp again.”

Then there was lunchtime.

“You’re so far away…” Marcille whines, stretching her arm out as if to manhandle Chilchuck back towards the rest of your party.

“There’s no room over there.”

Everyone stares at him for that, Izutsumi curling into your side protectively while Laios points down at the gaping space between you and Senshi with his plate. He grins, full of heart and goodwill, “There’s room right there, Chil’.”

“Oh,” Chilchuck’s shoulders slack, body unenthusiastically scooting across the floor until he’s awkwardly inserted beside you. Noticeably closer to Senshi than you, chuckling distantly and gazing solely into his food, “Duh. Didn’t notice that.”

Izutsumi smacks her lips in a rush to swallow her bite before contradicting, “You were staring at that spot for five minutes.”

“Thought you were gonna take it,” he recovers quickly, then promptly shutting his mouth the rest of lunch.

And the next day.

Anytime you spoke, he’d find an exit from the conversation. He’d conveniently need to speak with Laios, or Marcille, or Izutsumi, or Senshi whenever you approached. Not to mention how glaringly obvious the physical space between you was, whereas he usually traveled towards the middle of the pack with you he’s now suddenly braving the front alongside Laios.

Each effort on your part to shut down tension was swiftly dodged, only managing to thicken the strain between you.

Until that night:

“I’m heading for the bathroom,” Chilchuck rises from his bedroll with a yawn.

“Want me to go with?” Laios offers.

“No,” but his kindness is wasted on Chilchuck, who grimaces at the thought of pissing with a silently listening Laios.

Laios frowns over at you, “But it’s dark out there, I would’ve kept him safe.”

“He’ll live,” you retort, frustration with the lockpick boiling over into an eye roll.

You feel a lithe finger dig into your thigh, finding Marcille turned onto her tummy in her blanket, “You could go confront him now. He’ll have no excuses with nobody else around.”

Figures someone as invasive as Marcille is so invested in yours and Chilchuck’s recent friction.

“Yeah, I’ll just go up behind him while he’s peeing. Great idea.”

“Scare him into submission,” Izutsumi adds, though betraying you by selfishly occupying Chilchuck’s mat across the room. She snuggles into the warmth he’s left behind, yawning loudly -- looking about three seconds from drifting into slumber.

“There’s ale stocks along the way,” Senshi now joins the conversation, and is arguably the most helpful, “Some of ‘em bound to be full. He won’t turn down a drink.”

“Huh,” you tease the idea further. Even if by some uncharacteristic possession, Chilchuck does refuse the offer of alcohol, you can always beat him with the bottle. Knock him out to tie down and force out answers once he’s awake, “That could work…”

You replay that very thought process in your head as you await for Chilchuck to wander back down the hall. You passed as far as the corridor after the ale shelves before realizing how strange lingering outside the bathroom is, then deciding to sit with your back to the wall. Not long now, Chilchuck will be right in front of you.

He won’t jump back in shock, either. He’s heard you walking, you know he did because you heard him pause, sigh, and continue at a much, much slower pace. You’d almost be swooning over how he could discern it was you by your walk, if only there wasn’t such a vexing reason for you to be out here.

At least you have the advantage, your superior rodent vision can make him out in the pitch dark, meanwhile he’s relying on estimation as to where you are. If you wanted, you could probably just throw the ale at his head and get the knocking-him-unconscious bit over with.

“Okay,” he sighs again, louder, arms folded across his chest, “What?”

“Me what? How about you what?”

Chilchuck leans his head away from you, as if he can’t so much as stand to look at you, “What’re you talking about?”

“Just sit,” when he makes no such move, you lift one bottle in your hand, swirling the dark liquid inside, “I brought a bribe just to be nice, don’t let it go to waste.”

“Where’d you get that?” his curiosity blocks out his better instinct, sitting at your side to snatch up the bottle. You can see the instant he regrets it -- his nose wrinkles up and he swallows harshly, “Okay, what do you want?”

You ‘hpmh’ at his testy tone, letting him stew in the unpleasant silence before he’s uncorking the bottle and taking his first gulp. His nonchalance is more irritating than his avoidance; now he wants to insist you’re the weird one when he was dodging you as some toxic, erratic creature. Rage spurs you to your feet, swinging around to stand directly in front of him.

“You’re avoiding me, I know you are!” in retrospect, you will be glad you’re so far from the party so you two can yell without disturbing them.

“I am not!”

“Stop being defensive, just tell me what’s wrong so I can fix it!”

“I can’t,” Chilchuck grinds the heels of his palms into his eyes, face blooming red. That tangy aroma usually hidden until it was right under his nose, flooding his mouth. It was now overpowering your usual scent, and he assumes the only reason you’re so oblivious is because your own advanced smelling has grown blind to it, “It’s nothing you can fix. I’m just cursed with heightened senses.”

“Huh?”

“Huh?!” you stumble back, arms curling around your stomach, “No way! You can…”

.

.

.

Oh, God.

“Yep.”

Oh, God, no.

“Gross!”

Chilchuck shrugs, tilting the ale against his lips and murmuring into tinted glass, “Usually it's only the bloody part we can pick up on, but uh,” he sips the bitter liquid, clearly hesitant to finish his thought until your curious hum encourages him, “I guess beastkin are more… potent…”

“Ew!”

“I didn’t want to finish saying it!”

“But you did,” you gag, “You’re a pervert, phrasing it all nasty like that.”

“What? Would you rather me say it how Laios would?”

“Don’t even joke about that,” you go rigid suddenly, heart seizing at the mention of Laios, “He can’t find out about this.”

“Agreed, it’d be disgusting to hear him ask all those personal questions.”

“So,” you emphasize, clasping your hands nervously, “I need to get it taken care of before I become a problem.”

Chilchuck freezes. Eyes drifting slowly from his bottle to your pinched face, “No.”

“What?”

“No. Ask Senshi or Marcille -- hell! Knock out two problems in one swoop and have Laios help! He’ll leave you alone for the rest of your life if he can get all his questions out now.”

“I wasn’t saying that,” you totally were, and you should’ve known better due to his aversion to interpersonal party-relationships, “Just, I dunno, keep me away from the others.”

“Why me?” he groans.

“You’re the only one who knows…”

“What about Izutsumi? Can’t she be your guard?”

“No! I wanna preserve my positive image in her mind as long as I can.”

Chilchuck scowls, polishing off the bottle with a loud gulp and rolling the neck between his hands, “Guess this is why we never saw you around this time.”

“Uh-huh…”

“And you’re gonna be miserable down here until it's over.”

“Uh-huh.”

“And it’ll only be worse once you actually go into heat.”

“I know, Chilchuck, I’m thirty -- I know how my own heats work.”

You watch confirmed and suspected information sink in for him: Chilchuck was surprised to meet you upon joining the party, as far as he’d heard from whispered tales beastmen looked human most of their lives. Yet you’ve got large, circular ears with a light layer of fur, a pudgy button nose that twitches, and a fleshy tail unfurling to your ankles. You store fat easier than any other half-foot he’s ever met, your legs are stronger and faster than any other half-foot, too.

As terrible as it sounds out of context, your body fascinates him. Not to liken himself to Laios, but well… Ideally this could be his perfect excuse to fully explore, he could have so many questions answered.

Are there humanoid ears hidden behind your hair? Does the peach fuzz on your tail match what courses over your thighs and arms? Has the strength of a rat’s jaw proportionally stretched to your own, like with your legs? Is your whole body warm like a humanoid or cool like your tail? Do you only leave every other month because your rat heat is worse than your human ovulation?

Would having sex with you be like with any other half-foot, or would you be a completely new experience?

Have your strange circumstances forced you into a romantic stasis, making you vulnerable and sensitive to his experienced hands?

If he refuses you now, would you take the bait and ask Laios for help instead?

“Laios seriously doesn’t know about this? At all?”

“I’m sure he knows menstruation exists,” and by proxy ovulation, “but no, I haven’t mentioned my heat.”

“I would’ve thought he’d constantly ask about your… anatomy…”

“Honestly, I think it’s why he approached me to join his party, but I told him off after the first weird question,” you laugh quietly at the memory, “Funny enough, he didn’t seem weird. Most men that approached me were dogs, so meeting him was a relief. Never wanted to work for someone else after our first dive together.”

Chilchuck nods slowly, smoothing the pad of his thumb across the emptied bottle and staring into his dark, murky reflection, “You’ve been in the party longest. You gotta be fond of the guy by now.”

No, he corrects, judging by how you phrased it -- you’ve always been fond of him.

“I guess…” you shrug, “but I’m not fond fond,” you cross your arms defensively, humiliated chills racing up your arms at his unspoken rejection, “I could be, if you’re so adverse. It doesn’t have to be you, Chilchuck. Sorry for asking something so intimate.”

Chilchuck lays the bottle down, shaking his head as he stands, “Don’t ask that dolt. I’ll help.”

“Really?”

More questions infiltrate his mind, unwelcomed as they are interesting.

Do you squeal or huff when you cum? Are you the type to leave scratches? Do you bite (and thus, back to the jaw strength thing)? Would you let him yank your hair? Your tail? Both?

“Thanks, Chilchuck,” you feel the inexplicable need to whisper your appreciation, as if raising your voice could somehow rouse his testy attitude and result in backtracking.

“You should call me Chil.”

“Huh?”

“It’d be awkward to hear my whole name during sex. That’s about as close as people can get, right?”

“Oh!” you’re taken aback. You thought he was against that, though clearly…

His face is flushed (however his decisive speech and sturdy stance negate any intoxication allegations), and you can almost make out the thump of his heartbeat in the filling silence. Or maybe that part is your imagination. Maybe you’re hoping his heart is racing as fast as yours.

“When would be best?” he clears his throat, pulling at the collar of his shirt as though it's choking him, “Now?”

“No!” you cry, mostly out of shock he’s that willing, “No, it wouldn’t do anything now since I’m not… you know. Yet. We’ll have to wait.”

“How long?”

“Not sure. This is why I like to be at home during.”

“I get it,” he runs a hand down the length of his face, hissing quietly in exasperation, “I hate playing these things by ear.”

“‘These things’?” you chuckle as Chilchuck’s face goes red at the implication, he storms past you praying you drop his slip-up, “You do this kind of thing often?”

“Shut up.”

“So, you’re just the guy to go to, then! I should come to you every other month!”

“Shut up!”

…

“Glad to see you two made up,” Marcille’s cheery tone is the first to rake through the room next morning, “Though…”

You’re practically draped over Chilchuck’s back, already feeling your body temperature climbing unnaturally. He’s patting your sweltering cheek sympathetically, allowing you to burrow your face into the bend of his neck. And you’re pressing your chest obnoxiously into his back.

“You’re a bit close,” she teases in a quiet giggle.

Chilchuck rolls his eyes, biting back any replies to avoid unintentionally spilling your secret.

He turns, lips brushing your temple as he whispers to you, “How’re you doing? I could probably lie to Laios and- “

“No,” you whine, embarrassment evident in how you curl your arms tighter around his waist and shuffle closer, “I can’t right now, that’s so… weird.”

“Sure, that would be weird.”

That night, both you and Chilchuck jammed into an off-room from the rest of your party. You two having made the escape after everyone else fell asleep to avoid questions about why you were separating yourselves.

He chooses not to comment on how you strip down to only your panties before falling asleep.

…

Huffy panting causes Chilchuck to stir in his bedroll. A whine muffled into thin fluff, then the gentle drag of scratchy blankets catching on clothes as a lump grows more apparent beside him. Shyly, a hand wanders from clutching his arm to petting down his chest -- pausing at his belt and scrunching his shirt with a hearty groan. He watches quietly, heart thumping into his chest because he’s just not sure how to breach this.

Stupidly he’d assumed he still had more time. Looking back, he’s genuinely unsure as to why he ever thought that. The signs were there that tonight was his culling, weren’t they? He should’ve been more prepared.

While he’s internally debating the ethics of chickening out on his promise to you, you’re suffering. Bad.

Sweat clings along the back of your neck and all down your molten face. Worse than that heat, is the one between your thighs. You’ve been duly rubbing at yourself through your panties for the better half of eternity, earnestly hoping to deal with this yourself rather than following through with using Chilchuck. That in itself is proof you’re barely in your right mind, masturbating has never worked before -- obviously it won’t now.

All it succeeds in is making you wetter and messier.

A little physical stimulation, you reason, can’t be bad. So you faintly trail a hand over Chilchuck’s soft stomach, pausing before his crotch and feeling your chest pound at the thought:

Below his navel is his penis.

Then there’s the next thought:

His penis should be inside you.

You moan quietly, eyes clenched shut and cheek smushing into your bedroll. Were you not preoccupied with the broiling in your stomach, you’d probably be feeling the ache in your knees holding up your weight. Your back arched and rear presented for mounting.

Just as you’re delirious enough with desperation to shake Chilchuck awake, he’s turning onto his side and carding stray hairs from your damp face. Fire licks up his fingertips and he frowns, “You’re warm.”

“Chil,” relief fills you at his voice, something else filling the seat of your underwear. The hand on his tummy winds up to the collar of his shirt, you fumble with the top button, “Chil, can you- ? Please, I feel so fucking hot, Chil. I need you.”

Chilchuck casts the others a brief glance through the door before pushing up onto his elbows, one hand joining yours between your legs. He swallows harshly at the warmth, slithering beneath the waistband of your panties to skim his fingertips directly along your pussy. You push back into his hand with a mewl, near the point of gasping for breath at the new sensation of a man’s fingers pressing inside you.

“Slipped right in,” he muses, tilting his head to be level with yours, “So wet and ready, you should’ve woken me up before. Could’ve saved you the embarrassment.”

Anything impactful like words and vowels is slurred as you rock into Chilchuck’s hand, bottom lip tugged between your teeth. The pads of his fingers dive towards the pouch of your stomach, curling in search of one specific spot.

You gasp sharply and buck back, unabashedly and with no care if it catches bleary eyes from the other room, making him sure he’s found it. His other hand juts out to press up on your tummy, only aiding the pressure of his fingers inside you.

“Not- uh! - not gonna finish like this, Chil,” you whine pathetically, batting your lashes at him wetly.

“Who said anything about that?” he slips his fingers out of you, then swishing the soaked digits around your clit just to hear you try, and fail, to muffle a squeal into your pillow, “Finish: like it's a job. I’m trying to watch you squirm like the bitch in heat you are.”

You hadn’t assumed he was the type, given his opposition to being personal. His consistent, almost annoyingly thorough, separation of business and pleasure. This (apparently incorrect) observation stems from how you also hadn’t assumed he was the type to be curious about you.

Chilchuck teases your slit to watch if you'll try smothering more moans by biting your mat. He inches his face to yours, listening for pinched curses and wails. Eyes trail down your face to your chest, studying the way it pillows against the bedroll. He feels every part the creep he accused Laios of being.

“You're so sensitive,” he notes, shuffling onto his knees behind you, shoving his pants midway down his thighs, “What? Not used to this?”

You swat at him in protest, though still humping pathetically. Every twitch and moan is based on pure instinct, you’ve got no clue how to intentionally be sexy -- you’re just praying Chilchuck is too hypnotized by your cunt for your inexperience to be glaringly obvious. Between work and the fetishizing of both your race and curse, a partner has been hard to find: making you a rare half-foot approaching your golden years as a virgin.

Chilchuck lubes the head of his cock with your syrupy wetness before sliding inside, hands playing the fat of your hips. He lets out a low groan, one hand groping from your side up the curve of your ass and along your spine before winding in your hair. His fingers slot around the roots, taking the base of your skull to use as leverage while he fucks you.

He can make out the choked sound of you tempering a moan by sinking your teeth into cushion. You reach back, nails snagging his exposed thigh to anchor him deep inside your wetly clicking cunt. Chilchuck wrangles your back against his chest by your hair, placing his hand over your mouth as a muzzle. Hot breaths fan the soft skin of his palm, skin slapping skin slowly growing louder in a way that should make Chilchuck more careful than it does.

Rather, he speeds up, hand on your hip rounding to circle your sloshed, swollen clit.

“Just shut up and take it,” he grunts, releasing your mouth to seize your throat, until ribbed tissue presses into his palm.

Gagged whimpers and gasps die as sputters in the pit of your chest, Chilchuck biting and sucking your neck to silence his own wanton crowing.

Every glide out of you is met with your violent heat and need sucking him back in. Your head swivels, putty nose rolling against his cheek as you press sloppy kisses along his cheek.

Heeding your frantic, whispered pleas, Chilchuck shifts to return your kisses. Tongue against tongue, hands pulling your bodies into one sticky tangle.

“Gonna let me breed you?” he growls, using his weight over you to suddenly pin you against your bedroll. Your wetness dripping toward the mat, down his wrist, and along his pelvis, “Gonna give me a baby? Make me a daddy?” your ass perks up, tail coiling around his thigh to tether him, he chuckles cruelly down at you, “Yeah, such a good mousy cunt for me. Open and wet, taking my cock.”

“Yes, yes, yes,” you chant, gasping aloud now only for Chilchuck’s hand around your neck to return to your face -- two of his fingers depressing your tongue. Even with the obvious attempt to hush you, you call to him. Garbled, braindead slews of pleas for his cum and begging for (somehow) more attention.

“Is this really all your heat, or are you just such a secret slut?” your whine and clenching stir him up, gooey and compliant and bursting at the seams just for you, “Trying to be all cute, asking for help,” his thrusts quicken when you arch back, hand snatching around his at your clit, “If you wanted to be my cumslut, you could’ve fucking said so.”

You bury your face into your makeshift bed, muffling something in the mat, and Chilchuck yanks your head up by your hair,

“What was that, slut?”

Your thighs are quivering, cunt gushing around him, chest pounding erratically with the need for air, “Just want your cum, Chil!”

Chilchuck stills against you, shuddering and cock heavy in your gut as he cums inside you--

Not that you’re finished yet.

“So good!” you sing, welcoming the reprieve and stubbornly tucking Chilchuck deeper inside you despite him being spent. He throws his head back, eyes rolling in his skull as you continue, “Just a bit more, Chil, please, please, please!”

“Desperate whore,” he slumps forward, biting your shoulder before whirring onto his back, “You do the work now, if you’re so fuckin’ greedy.”

“So mean,” you pout, though the complaint doesn’t deter you from sinking onto his cock like this.

“You’re gonna fuck me asleep,” Chilchuck is courteous enough to languidly snap his hips up into yours, “Needy, desperate bitch.”

For as much as he teases you -- he’s on the brink of tears from overstimulation, voice clipped and throat raw with the need to cry.

“Just one more,” you whine, hands scratching back against his chest, “Gimme one more, please?”

“Fuck,” Chilchuck sucks in a sharp breath, icy tears pricking at the corner of his eyes, “Fine.”

An airy giggle flows through your lips, ditzy and hot and eager.

A few aggravated plaps is enough for Chilchuck to be puffing and shaking, your bounces deteriorate into heedy grinding. Chilchuck winds both arms around your midsection to pull your back against his chest, frustrated tears caking his lashes the longer his abused cock cooks inside you.

“C’mon, babe, you can cum for me. You gotta feel good, too, right?” he’s murmuring in your fluffy ear, flicking your clit with his thumb, “No point in this if you don’t feel good, too.”

His words are not what flips you into euphoria, but rather the sensation of his cum trickling from your swollen cunt -- fucked loose from your incessant jerking on him.

You toss your head back, Chilchuck narrowly avoiding a broken nose by swerving to the side. Loudly thunking together, your clamped knees trap his hand between your thighs -- gurgled cries for breath and his name croak from your hanging mouth.

“Good slut,” he lays sloppy, open-mouthed kisses against your neck, fingers slowing to a pause on your clit, “Best cunt for me.”

“Thank you,” you sigh into the open air, voice all soft and sweet.

Chilchuck laughs at the sound, lulling to the side to spoon you, “You’re way nicer like this. Could get used to it.”

“Don’t ruin this,” you yawn, pinching his wrist.

“Whatever, this better be enough to satisfy you,” he pulls the blanket over your conjoined limbs, too drained to pull up his pants and redress you.

“Hey,” you call, met with a soft groan of acknowledgement, “You know I’m not a mouse, right? I’m a rat.”

“Mhm,” he lazily confirms, “Sounds better than ratty cunt, though. So pick your battles.”

The next morning, a hand is shaking you awake. A soft and polite gesture immediately ruined when you realize the hand is much larger than Chilchuck’s. In a panic, your eyes shoot open to see your cheerful party leader.

“Thanks for going in the other room,” is the first thing out of his mouth, and you want to punch him, “I figure you two would want to get sorted out before everyone else wakes up.”

“Laios…”

“Hm?” his hand is still burning a hole through the sheet on your shoulder.

“Stop touching me.”

“Sorry!” he clutches the offending mitt to his chest, then rising to a stand and waving goodbye, “See you in a bit! Try not to take too long, okay? I have a lot of questions.”

“Get out.”

Unbothered by your mortification, Laios gives a thumbs up and creeps out into the room with the rest of your party.

“We should kill him,” Chilchuck husks into your ear.

“We should.”

“So,” Chilchuck cups the pouch of your tummy, squeezing in a way simultaneously strange and affectionate, “‘s this gonna become a problem?”

“Hm? Oh, no, I think I’m infertile.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. Rat eggs and human eggs don’t actually mix well.”

“Well, it’s a relief I won’t have to raise another kid, I guess. How terrible would that be? I’d be on my deathbed when it gets married.”

…?

???

“Hey, wait,” you roll over in bed, brows furrowed at the man, “Another?”

He nods sluggishly, judgment clouded by both drowsiness and libido, “Three daughters already, so that’d be my fourth,” he cackles at your shocked face, “What? Sex with a coworker you don’t know isn’t panning how you thought?”

“Oh, shut up. I know you, just not your family. Totally different.”

“Definitely. Opposites.”

“So,” Laios swings his head towards Chilchuck, smiling politely, “How many nipples?”

~~~

stupid bonus

“What?” Chilchuck’s eye twitches.

“Sadly, I think it's only two because there’s only two visible mammaries…” the blonde has the gall to sigh at such a thought before suddenly blooming excitement, “Unless there’s more hiding in some kind of wrap! Are there?”

[a-killer-obsession]

Hey you know im gonna need AFAB she/her reader with a respectful number 9 with some accidental P and desperate T >:3c and if you can work in some F and W elements too well that would be an added bonus

That's a extra large number 9 McHorny Meal with a boytoy, please enjoy your meal!

Touch of Pollen, Touch of Pearl

Prompt: Sex Pollen + Thighjob + First Time + Body Worship

Additional Tags: afab reader, she/her pronouns, shark anatomy (claspers aka two dicks), masturbation, this came out a little omegaversy lmao, biting, size difference, this is basically a monsterfucker fic, oral (recieving), fingering, forced orgasms, pervert fish?, p n v sex, creampie, cumshot, aftercare, friends to lovers

WC: 7.6k dear god

Event Masterlist

🔞 Minors DNI 🔞

You were a little anxious to say the least, pacing the lawn deck of the Sunny nervously as you waited for the scouting party to return. You'd only been on the crew a few months, but you cared about them greatly, and though the island was uninhabited you still held concerns. As the new botanist for the Straw Hats, born and raised in the New World, you knew how deceptively dangerous even just the plant life on these sorts of islands could be, and you cursed yourself for not insisting you joined the scouting party when you didn't draw a coloured straw to be chosen. Grass was flattened and getting damaged in the straight path you walked back and forth, other members idly sitting around on the lawn or stairs but nonchalantly keeping an eye out as well.

Usopp stood on the stern castle deck near the entrance to the aquarium, a telescope in hand that quickly shifted as he caught movement at the treeline. “They're coming back!” He announced, mouth turning downwards to a pout, “I think something is wrong, Robin's fleur is carrying Boss Jinbei”

You rushed up the stairs and grabbed the telescope to look, pointing it to where he'd been looking. Sure enough Nami and Robin were running towards the ship, Robin's arm's crossed and pink petals swirling in the air as giant hands appeared and disappeared in turns, carefully passing along Jinbei between them to move alongside them. He looked unconscious but you couldn't see any blood from this distance, so it was impossible to tell what was wrong. You could see Robin through the telescope as she spotted you, concern on her face as her mouth began to move. You almost yelped as the voice appeared right beside you, her pretty mouth tickling your shoulder where it had appeared as she spoke.

“[Y/n]! Can you hear me? Nod if you can,” the mouth said in Robin's sweet voice, a little panicked sounding which filled you with worry given her usually calm demeanour during times of crisis. You nodded in her direction, still too small to see her properly without the telescope but you assumed she had an eye somewhere you couldn't see. “Good, listen to me carefully. The three of us got hit with some sort of pollen spores, but it only seemed to affect Boss Jinbei. I'm worried about contamination so tell the others to put Boss Jinbei's mattress in the aquarium, then keep everyone clear of us, I mean it. Even Chopper, we don't know yet how this will affect the others if we still have pollen on us”

You gave a stern nod and turned to the others, who were slowly gathering behind you. “Franky, grab the Boss's mattress and take it to the aquarium then come back here. Nobody approach them when they arrive, I have a theory but right now it's not safe, we don't know how contagious they are”

“But I have to treat Boss!” Chopper cried.

“I know Chopper, but we can't have our brilliant doctor getting sick, Jinbei wouldn't want that,” you told him, making Chopper do his blushy little wiggle dance, “they said they all got hit by pollen so they could still all be covered in it, we need to keep our head about us”

“Okay…” Chopper said sadly, kicking at nothing. Franky returned from moving the mattress and joined the others as they gathered in front of the door to the boy's cabin, leaving plenty of space for the scouting party to ascend the gangplank and head to the aquarium. A giant hand appeared on the deck in a flurry of pink petals as they got close, receiving Jinbei from the previous hand and taking him to the aquarium as a trail of smaller hands received him and passed him through the door and out of sight.

“Robin-cwan! Nami-swan!” Sanji cooed as he ran towards the two women ascending the gangplank with open arms. You caught him by his collar, momentarily choking him as you yanked him backwards, throwing him at Zoro who rolled his eyes and hooked his arms under the cook's armpits to trap him.

“Sanji are you stupid?” You chided, “I told you we have to stay clear!”

“Sorry, my darling! I was caught in a spell of love!” Sanji replied, immediately starting to fight Zoro and setting off a fistfight that quickly ended for both of them with a hard knock to their heads from your closed fists, leaving them to sit on the grass and rub their scalps. Robin was saying something to Nami as they came on deck, and Nami quickly disappeared up the stairs and through the aquarium door.

“Robin! What happened!?” Chopper cried, rearing to go to her.

“It was some sort of mushroom,” she panted heavily from the run and straining use of her devil fruit, who knew how long they'd been running. “Nami stepped on it and it let some sort of cloud of spores out, and then Boss Jinbei started getting sweaty and feverish and collapsed”

“Did you see the mushroom?” You asked, a theory in mind but you needed to check your books and confirm the plant first.

“I did, and I'm guessing you have the same theory as I do about its effectiveness,” she suggested.

“Aye,” You replied confidently. “Sanji, Chopper, go to the kitchen once Robin and I are behind closed doors, use the pulley to communicate with Nami. I don't know the exact nature of what he's being affected by right now, but there are many plants and fungi on the Grandline that only affect males, so I believe us women are safe, as well as Brook I believe, since he doesn't have the capacity to be affected by drugs. Brook, go take Nami's place so she can shower, tell her to rinse her clothes and make sure she scrubs her hair well, Robin and I will go to the library to confirm the mushroom”

“What about the rest of us?” Luffy asked, pinky up his nose casually. You were glad to have such a laid back captain who had no problem giving up power at a time like this.

“The rest of you stay in the boy's cabin till someone comes to get you,” you ordered, already starting to leave, Brook long since run off to relieve Nami. “You have to all stay here till there's no chance of contamination. It shouldn't take long, just until Nami and Robin are clean, but under no circumstances is anyone other than myself, Robin, Nami or Brook, permitted to enter the aquarium. Even if Jinbei is cleaned we won't know if what he has is contagious to the rest of the men on board anyway”

“Right!” Usopp declared, hands on hips, pretending that he wasn't terrified and unbelievably relieved that he could just go hide in his bed.

You hurried off to join Robin, the two of you rushing up the stairs, the sound of footsteps and little hooves a safe distance behind you as Sanji and Chopper headed to the galley. You rushed to your shelf and pulled out a few books while Robin described the mushroom in great detail. Small, fat head, vibrant purple, blue spots, bulbous, she described it as being the relative shape and size of a dog's penis, which seemed oddly specific but you didn't question it. Robin searched through one book while you searched another, until she, with her undeniably impressive research skills, found a diagram of the mushroom she'd seen and slid the book across the table for you to decipher the technical jargon that she only particularly understood, being that this wasn't her field of knowledge.

“This isn't good,” you bit you lip as you recognized the page and remembered what you knew of it, “he's been hit by a powerful aphrodisiac, and just as we thought it only affects the males of species that procreate through sexual reproduction”

“It probably bolsters species numbers so it has more corpses to feed off,” Robin said nonchalantly. You shuddered at the incredibly morbid observation but she was probably right. “How will it affect Boss Jinbei?”

“His body is telling him right now that he needs to breed,” you sighed, scanning the page and reading the lists of side effects and potential treatments. “He's essentially going into the mammal equivalent of a rut. It says here the effects can last up to four days until-” you re-read the passage over and over hoping you were reading it wrong but disparingly it remained the same.

“Until what?” Robin asked with great concern as she noted your hesitation.

“Until his body gives out from the strain and he dies,” you replied, voice shakey. Robin was cold and silent as she processed the statement, logical mind in overdrive as she looked for a solution, separating herself from her feelings to keep her wits about her as she often did in situations like this. “What happens when animals are exposed?” She finally asked. “If it wants them to reproduce, surely it doesn't just kill them?”

“It says they mate several times and the effects wear off, if they don't find a mate the mortality time frame is two to seven days depending on the size of the animal,” you reported, slumping into a chair in defeat, already mourning the loss of the helmsman you'd come to really care for. Really, really cared for. Now that you were losing him, your heart was going into overdrive and you regretted never telling him how you really felt. Would he even be coherent enough to understand if you told him now?

“So he just needs to mate then,” Robin said matter-of-factly, like it was no big deal, shaking you from your self-immolating spiral. You brows shot up in surprise, like she wasn't suggesting the fishman just needed to get laid to save his life. “Do you want to do it or shall I? Nami is only interested in women, I don't believe she'll be of help here.”

“Robin!” You exclaimed, vibrant blush spreading on your cheeks as you considered what it might be like to lay with Jinbei. So strong… so… big… it wasn't like it was the first time you'd thought about it either. Robin quirked a brow, she could practically see the cogs turning in your head.

“You like him, don't you?” She smiled knowingly. You gave a frustrated huff and crossed your arms but didn't correct her, making her giggle. “I'll leave him in your care then. I should go shower, but I'll update Chopper on the situation afterwards and say what he says”

“Robinnnn, I can't-” you complained, “I mean… he's not in his right mind, what if he hates me after?”

“I can assure you that Boss Jinbei will probably be the one apologising profusely afterwards,” she smiled, “he'll probably blame himself and claim he took advantage of you. It'll be fine, [y/n], I think he'll be thankful you did it instead of letting him suffer and die. It's not the worst thing to happen, he is quite fond of you after all”

“He is?” You blushed, picking at your cuticles under the table.

“He told me himself he thinks you're quite beautiful,” she assured you, no hint of untruthfulness or malice in her voice. “I should warn you though, I've discussed fishman anatomy with him in great detail for my research and you may find he is quite unlike any human you've been with”

“Ah, yes.. because I have definitely slept with other humans,” you mumbled sarcastically. Robin took a seat next to you and rubbed your hand reassuringly.

“[Y/n] my dear, are you a virgin?” She asked softly, no hint of mockery in her voice, only quiet concern.

“... yes,” you replied in a small voice. She made a little sigh and rubbed the back of your hand with her other, your palm sandwiched between her soft warm ones.

“Are you sure you want to do this then?” She asked, “I don't want you to be uncomfortable. It's a lot to ask of someone even if they had experience”

“It's okay, I think, if it's him,” you replied with a heavy blush, “it's not that I never wanted to, I just never had the opportunity, given my… coloured… history. I've done… some things… just never the whole way. What do you mean thought by ‘he's unlike a human’?”

“Ah,” Robin smiled softly at you, “you see, Boss Jinbei is a whale shark fishman. His genitals are quite like that of a whale shark.”

“Meaning?” You pressed.

“Meaning, he has claspers instead of a penis,” she explained. You cocked a brow, not missing the plural.

“Claspers, multiple?” You asked.

“Yes, two of them,” she answered causally with that usual sweet smile of hers like she hadn't just dropped a bombshell. You must have been cherry red at this point, your face hot with flush. “There is also something else,” she continued, and you wondered how she could possibly have anything more shocking to say than dropping than Jinbei has two dicks. “You are aware of how some mammals lock together during mating, yes?” You nodded anxiously, already seeing where this was going, “Claspers have a similar process, so you may find a little discomfort as he finishes”

“Oh, okay,” you blinked, trying to recall every moment in your life that led to this bizarre scenario. That's what you get for staying on the Grandline you guessed. “What do I… um… what do I do? I mean how do I… how do I please him?”

“Just follow his lead,” Robin assured you, “I'm sure despite the pollen he will be a gentleman. Boss Jinbei has a strong will, a little horniness isn't going to be enough to make him hurt you”

“Okay,” you replied anxiously.

“I'll keep the other's from the aquarium, make sure you shut the pulley hatch though, or the sound will travel,” she winked as she stood, bringing on a whole new round of fluster. “If you change your mind just tell me, I won't judge you if you don't feel comfortable with the situation, I'll take care of him if you find yourself unable to”

“Thank you Robin,” you sighed as you stood, following her out the door. You made your way down the stairs as she headed the other way to head to the bathroom, and you took a deep breath before entering the aquarium. Jinbei was laying on the mattress in the middle of the floor, pushed up against the bar seating that surrounded the mizzenmast running through the center of the room. His kimono was open to the waist, his red sun tattoo on full display, smooth skin dripping with sweat as his chest heaved with heavy breaths. He was unconscious still, Brook carefully dabbing at his forehead with a cold damp cloth.

“Ah! [Y/n]-san! Do you have news?” Brook asked hurriedly, resting the cloth over Jinbei's forehead as he turned his attention to you. You sat on one of the bench seats that lined the half moon room, blue aquarium lights colouring the room in soft lighting that would be romantic under other circumstances.

“We know the mushroom that he was affected by, and we were correct in thinking it only affects males,” you looked at Brook, “sorry, males within their fertile age range.” Brook nodded for you to continue, not taking offense to your attempt at not immasculating him, he understood what you meant. “I can help him, he'll be okay, but I'll need some privacy for the rest of the day and evening. The treatment is quite delicate, I don't think he'd like others seeing him in that position”

“It sounds like you're going to torture him,” Brook half laughed, and you struggled to force a smile for him to keep it lighthearted. In reality, Jinbei's current position, laid out and panting, half clothed and covered in sweat, was having an effect of its own on you, and you felt a little ashamed that you were beginning to look forward to the… treatment… despite the fact that Jinbei was clearly suffering right now. “Shall I leave then?” Brook asked, standing and reminding you how incredibly tall he was.

“Yes, thank you Brook, I can look after him from here,” you hummed, “please ask Sanji to send our dinner up in the pulley as well as plenty of water. I'll also need some clean towels, and probably some more cloths with a bucket of water to wet them”

“Aye aye, [y/n]-san!” Brook gave a mock salute, “please take care of Boss-san!”

“He's gonna be okay, Brook,” you smiled, running a thumb over the back of the skeleton's cold boney hand. You weren't sure if he could feel it but you hoped the motion was comforting anyway. You could tell that Brook was concerned, he was doing his best to come off as nonchalant but you knew he cared a great deal about Jinbei, and could hear the underlying concern in his voice. He gave your hand a squeeze, letting you know he understood the gesture and appreciated it, before leaving to pass on your message and gather things for you.

You pulled your knees up to your chin as you watched over Jinbei. From what the book explained, right now he was going through a process that would usually take several days, his body being pumped full of hormones that would put him into a frenzy when he eventually woke up. For now he would likely be asleep a little longer, so you had a little time to prepare. First you took the towels and bucket of water that were sent up the pulley, setting them aside on a bench with the bucket on the floor. You set the large jug of water Sanji sent up on the bar counter along with the two glasses, and set beside them the lovingly made snacks that were sent up with them. You took the opportunity to eat and drink a little while you could, then, satisfied there was nothing more to be done, you locked the aquarium door, shut the pulley hatch, and removed most of your clothes. They were going to come off anyway, you may as well make it less awkward for Jinbei by doing some of the work now, leaving yourself in only your loose comfortable shirt and panties. You curled up on the mattress beside him, Jinbei making little groans as you pressed against his side. His usually cool skin was almost blistering to the touch, yet it erupted in goosebumps wherever you made contact. You hoped your physical presence could offer him some comfort during his fever dreams, at the very least he would know he wasn't alone when he woke up.

⋆★⋆★⋆★⋆★⋆

The mattress shifting underneath you woke you from your unintentional nap, heavy breathing and groans next to you indicating that Jinbei was awake. You realised his kimono was draped over you like a blanket, still warm from being against his feverish skin, but notably that meant he was likely naked. You turned your body to face him, his bare back to you, hand at his front moving frantically, you didn't need two guesses to know why. You could hear his teeth occasionally click together like he was biting air as he made frustrated growls and fisted himself. He nearly jumped out of his skin as you reached over and placed a hand on his shoulder, his smooth skin coated in sweat.

“[Y/n]!” He exclaimed, curling in on himself to hide his shame, “please excuse me! I didn't mean to- I mean I had to- ah, I'm usually more controlled than this!”

“It's okay Boss, you're not in your right mind,” you cooed, rubbing his back soothingly, “you've been dosed with an aphrodisiac, how much do you remember?”

“Ah, we were scouting and then,” his brows furrowed as he tried to fight the horny haze in his brain to concentrate, “Nami stood on something, and there was some sort of cloud, and I felt warm and dizzy. I don't remember anything after that. Ah, are the other's okay?”

“She stood on a mushroom,” you explained, “Robin and Nami are okay, as is everyone else. The mushroom only affects breeding age males, the others are all being kept clear of this room. Right now, you're experiencing the mammal equivalent of a rut. Do you understand?”

“Ah, that does explain my… condition,” he hummed, cheeks flush with embarrassment. Jinbei was strong and brave, even against emperors he showed no fear, but when it came to matters of sexual needs, his confidence was practically stripped from him. He was raised in a generation that instilled a great amount of taboo about all things of a sexual nature, he knew it was just a natural process many experienced and the foundation of how most species continued, but he couldn't bring himself to work past the feeling of shame that sat deep within him for having such desires.

“I know this is… awkward… but you have to let it run its course,” you said softly, “you have to give in, or it'll wear you down till your body gives out. That's why I'm here. I imagine you are… unable to find satisfaction on your own right now, because of the pollen”

“You would be correct,” Jinbei cleared his throat awkwardly, “but I can not ask you to do that. I will die with my honour intact instead, I will not force myself on you because of this”

“Jinbei…” he shivered a little at your use of his name, you only ever called him Boss as many of the crew did, and his name sounded like honey dripping from your tongue. “You won't be forcing me to do anything, I'm offering. I… like you…” your voice cracked a little as you forced out the confession, no time like the present you guessed, especially if this was your only chance to say it. “Robin has offered as well, if you would prefer her…”

“No!” He spooked you a little with the speed he turned over, taking your wrist firmly but not painfully in his large smooth hand, “I, I want you. I woke up thinking about you. Even before I realised you were here, I could smell you, that delicious sweet scent you have,” your breath hitched as he pressed his nose against the crook of your neck, forcing your head to move and unintentionally baring it for him. He took a deep inhale, making a small groan as he caught your scent. “You've always smelt so good to me, and you're so beautiful. So sweet and strong and kind, I care a great deal about you. Which is why I can't take what you're offering, my pearl”

“I can't let you die,” you whispered, pressing your forehead against his as he retracted his face from your shoulder. You shuffled forward so your bodies were pressed together, feeling the long hard forms of his two cocks against your abdomen. It made you ache with need, unconsciously pressing harder against him. “I want you, Boss,” you whispered, “and I want you to be okay. So use me, use my body to fight the pollen, so you can live. You care about me, don't you? Don't hurt me by letting yourself die because of a stupid outdated concept like honour. It's not honourable to let yourself die needlessly, let me help you”

Jinbei made a little whimper as your words soaked in, letting you guide his hand to rest against your ass. You reached down between your bodies, taking his claspers in your small, shaky hand and doing what you could to hold them together, unable to wrap your hand around them properly. He was big, proportional to his large body, each one being about the length and width of your arm from fingertip to elbow, thicker even perhaps, smooth and tapered at the end, witg none of the prominent veins or defined head that a human cock had. He made a stuttered groan as you touched him, his hand flexing on instinct and unintentionally squeezing the flesh of your ass, his hand large enough to cover the whole of your rump. It was just as well he was big, with your face up near his you could barely reach, the base of his cock closer to your knees than your own center, but his cocks were long enough that you could reach the top third of them anyway.

His eyes were shut as you touched him, making restrained groans as you ran your other hand up his chest, till it cupped his cheek, running your thumb curiously over the edge of a tusk. His eyes opened in surprise as you pressed your lips against his, small mouth slotting nicely between his tusks which were smooth against your cheeks. His eyes closed again as he returned the kiss, his lips parting as his tongue pressed against yours, so wide it barely fit in your mouth, sparking arousal at your core at just how big everything about him was. His sharp teeth were no issue as he kept dominance over the kiss, pollen driving his need as he began to buck into your hand, the tips of his claspers finding their way under your shirt till he was sliding against your warm bare skin. Something in him snapped as you let out a needy whine, pollen taking his mind completely as he broke from the kiss and flipped you over so your back was against his front, your core aligned with his. He pressed against your ass, his cocks driving against you as he rutted desperately till he found what he needed, the pair sliding between your thighs and making him growl as he found the pressure he was looking for. He immediately set a fast pace, fucking your thighs hard, hands holding your hips tight as his cocks rubbed firmly against your center, grinding against your clothed clit and making you moan. Your moans only spurred him on more, entirely driven by lust and need, and he could feel the way your panties grew damper with every long pull, the scent of your arousal thicker by the moment and slowly driving him insane.

He made a possessive growl as he tore your panties from your body, making you yelp in surprise, his hands pushing your shirt up roughly and groping your soft breasts as he felt the first drops of your slick against his cocks and made a deep satisfied rubble that reverberated through your chest as he pinned you against him. His claspers were pressed hard against your pussy, slicker with every pull, rolling your clit back and forth between them as they moved, making you whine and squeeze your thighs harder to force more pressure. You couldn't have fought him off even if you wanted to, his hold so tight on you as he moved one hand back to your hip, the other still kneading your breasts and playing with your nipples, that clicking sound of his teeth slamming together returning behind you. A thought occurred to you, knowing he was being driven by instincts right now, and knowing many predator species used their teeth to hold the female during mating.

“Boss, you can bite me if you need to,” you whined, pulling your shirt aside to expose your skin. His nose breezed against your neck again, making you shiver, the clicking sound now right against your ear. Your shirt was suddenly torn open, the remnants hanging weakly from your torso as you felt his teeth nip at your skin. He didn't sink them in like you thought he might, instead just pricking the skin like little needles, barely noticeable past the pleasure he was giving you, making small love bites that only occasionally drew a tiny amount of blood, which he would tenderly soothe with his wide tongue before making a new mark. The deep rumble in his chest continued, almost akin to a purr, making your whole body vibrate pleasantly. He shifted slightly and it had the effect of making one cock zero in on your clit. Previously it'd been sort of ground between them, but now he was making direct contact against it and your coil quickly pulled taught. You fought his hold instinctively against the overstimulation, but unable to escape you had no choice but to let go, gushing over his cocks and shaking hard against him. He groaned as he felt your release and bit your shoulder again, this time holding his teeth almost threateningly against your delicate skin as the ends of his claspers opened like umbrellas and great swathes of cum shot from them, pooling against your thighs and on the mattress in front of you as you made overstimulated whimpers.

His hold only slightly loosened on you, his thick tongue running over your shoulder and neck before shifting so you fell back against the mattress, cum pooling underneath you as the weight on the mattress made it run in your direction. You felt utterly lewd sitting in a pool of his cum, some of it still dripping over your front as you panted, the thick fluid slowly seeping into the bedding below as it cooled. His tongue never stopped moving as he loomed over you, running it over your torso, wide enough that he could envelop an entire breast with one swipe of the wet appendage before sucking it into his mouth, careful of his teeth as he flicked your pert nipples with the tip of his tongue. You were a squirming, panting mess underneath him, the scraps of your shirt pulled from your body leaving you entirely nude underneath him, his tongue travelling further and further down as he licked and touched every part of you. He pushed your legs apart and knelt between them, grabbing your ankles and pulling them up so he could run his tongue over your legs, leaving you with only the upper half of your torso against the mattress as he dangled you practically upside-down. The way he manhandled you made you ache, he could snap you like a twig if he wanted to but his hands were firm and gentle, prying your legs apart as you grew suddenly shy. He gave you a hungry look as he held you open by your thighs, his large hands able to wrap right around them like he was holding no more than a couple of training weights, admiring the vibrant blush on your face as you failed to hide behind your hands, and the way his cum was now coating your hair with the way he was holding you. He kept eye contact with you as he ran his tongue between your folds, making you buck and squirm as he held you tight, lapping at you like you were a frozen treat before zeroing in on your sensitive clit and giving it a harsh suck. The sounds you were making made him rut against nothing, though occasionally you could feel the tips of his hardened lengths against your back whenever his hips jolted forward. The end of his tongue teased against your entrance and you held your breath, overly anxious from having never been penetrated before. He could see your hesitation and despite the cloud of lust, he stopped himself, concerned for your wellbeing.

“Do you want me to stop, my pearl?” He asked, voice husky and deep, making your eyes momentarily flutter shut as you shivered.

“No, don't stop,” you whined, “I just haven't… I've never had anyone there”

“I can avoid that, if you'd like,” he said softly, “there are plenty of other things I can do,” he continued playfully, running his tongue flat over your pussy to emphasize his point.

“No, I want it,” you moaned, reaching up to touch him but unable to reach, arms falling uselessly back to the blankets, “I want you inside me, please Jinbei”

Your hips rolled on their own accord, searching unconsciously for fullness, and his cocks twitched at your neediness. “I'll be so gentle with you, my pearl,” he cooed, the tip of his tongue back at your entrance where you ached for him. He pushed it in slowly, watching your face carefully for any sign of unease or pain, knowing full well his tongue was thicker than any normal human man's cock. He probably should have used his fingers first, but they were impossibly thick as well, so it probably made little difference. At least your previous orgasm had relaxed you a little, allowing him to get about a third of his wide tongue inside you without much resistance, slowly sinking more in as you stretched around it. You were already moaning and writhing at the fill and he hadn't even done anything yet, making a grin spread over his face as he watched you drape an arm over your eyes and grope at your own breast with the other hand.

Finally he hit the thickest part of his tongue, sliding the rest in with relative ease, making you let out a long, deep moan as his tongue began to thrust in and out of you, causing you a type of pleasure that was entirely unfamiliar to you. He barely had to move, making agonizingly slow, shallow pulls and thrusts with his tongue that had your pussy fluttering around him, crying out in pleasure while your honey pooled on his tastebuds. He curled it inside you, pressing against your spongey g-spot and making you see white as you suddenly came again without warning, gushing on his tongue, making him groan as he made lewd slurping noses and drank your release.

“You're doing so well, my pearl,” he praised as he removed his tongue, giving you one more wide stripe of it before lowering your pelvis to his lap as he licked his lips. You could feel his claspers, hard and twitching against your back. Your legs were either side of Jinbei, soaked pussy pressed against his front by design, arousal catching on his curly black tuft of pubic hair as your chest continued to heave with every heavy pant. Your ass was pressed against the base of his cocks, and from this position you could feel how they reached all the way to your upper back, to the bottom of your shoulder blades. There was no way you could take him, it was physically impossible, but you couldn't help your curiosity as you wondered what it might feel like for him to fill you with what he could, especially given the nirvana you'd found with his tongue alone. One of your hands stayed drapped over your face, unable to bring yourself to look at him, embarrassed by how debauched you must look. The other you slid under your back, making Jinbei grunt as you found a clasper and stroked it experimentally.

“Jinbei,” you whined, “want you~”

“Are you sure, my pearl?” He asked hesitantly, bringing a thumb to your wet cunt and pressing it gently against your swollen clit, making you squeak. You could feel how hard he still was underneath you despite how much he'd cum earlier, the pollen needed more from him, he needed another release, and you wanted it too.

“Want you inside me, please,” you moaned, rolling your hips to grind yourself against his thumb. Jinbei's teeth clicked together again, and he shook his head as he fought the suffocating cloud of lust the pollen was causing. Everything in his brain was telling him to grab you hard and use your body till you were fat with his babies, but he couldn't do that to you, so small and fragile and trusting under his strong hands. You finally pulled your arm away from your face enough to look at him, peeking out from beneath your forearm, eyes blown out with lust, your lip millimeters from bleeding as you bit down on it.

“Fuck,” he huffed, knowing full well he couldn't deny you when you were looking at him like that. You shivered with anticipation, you were sure you'd never even heard him swear before, and it made your pussy drip knowing it was your expression alone that made the usually polite, well mannered gentleman curse. He wasn't even sure at this point if it was the pollen or just your body squirming under him that made him feel so aggressively horny and possessive of you, seeing the perfect half moons of small red dashes that littered your skin from his teeth, marking you as his. He wanted all of you, and the way you gripped his cock told him how much you wanted all of him too.

He slid his hand under your rump for just a moment, freeing the clasper you weren't holding, pulling it to the front and letting it fall heavy against you with a wet slap. The base of it gave you something to grind against, which you did eagerly, lubricating him with your arousal while his tip laid between your breasts, precum dripping from it and dribbling down towards your neck. You looked at him as you teasingly craned your neck, swiping your tongue over the end and gathering some of the salty fluid that leaked from it, feeling it pulse against your abdomen as more fluid leaked onto your tongue. You let yourself lay back again, ass still raised in his lap as you grinded against him, licking your lips as you held eye contact. He made a little growl, undeniably turned on by what you'd done, then he grabbed you with a hand under your back and the other under your ass, scooping you up and moving you easily as though you weighed nothing, seating you on the long bench that bordered the aquarium. Your body was almost as blue as his under the soft lighting, and his hands pressed against the underside of your thighs, pushing them up and out so your cunt was on full display for him, pussy slightly gaped from his thick tongue and glistening with honey. He had you practically folded in half, chest and head pressed against the back of the padded bench, ass at the edge of the seating, legs in the air. You would have been embarrassed by how exposed your cunt was but the hungry way he was looking at you overrid any inclination of shyness. He lowered his face to your pussy and ran a wide stripe up it again, letting his tongue continue upwards, running over your stomach and between you breasts, lapping up his own precum until his tongue reached your mouth and he captured your lips in a hungry kiss.

He used the kiss to distract you as he slid two thick fingers inside your pussy, pumping you slowly and scissoring them to stretch you out, the webbing between fingers catching against your edges and assisting with the stretch. He added a third, swallowing the whine you made at the slightly painful stretch, which faded back to pleasure as you adjusted to him. He brought his cocks up to rest against your stomach and you reached between your bodies to take one in each hand, stroking them the pace he was setting with his fingers even if you couldn't fit your hands right around them.

Satisfied you were open enough to take him, he sat back on the balls of his feet, fisting his claspers together in one hand, his hands big enough to reach around both at once with no issue. You bit your lip as you looked at them, so impossibly big, and it was like he could read your mind as he ran a soothing thumb over your inner thigh.

“I don't expect you to take all of me, my pearl,” he assured you, “just some of one will feel devine I am certain. Are you ready my love? You can say no, I won't be upset with you.”

You nodded and bit your finger nervously, letting your knees fall outwards to spread yourself as wide as you could, feet resting on the curved bench either side of you. He took a clasper in each hand, guiding one to rest against you while he positioned the other at your entrance. “It may hurt a little at first, but only for a moment. You'll tell me if it gets too much, right?”

You nodded again and he gave you a soft smile, running a hand up your chest till it cupped your face, holding you so very gently and rubbing his thumb over your cheek and lips as he began to slide his cock inside you. He'd prepared you well, but there was still some amount of stretch, a slight stinging pain as your entrance widened to its limits. He saw the pained expression on your face and cooed soft praises, moving as slowly as he could until he felt his tip press against your cervix, pulling back a little so he wouldn't hurt you by pressing against it. He stayed deadly still until the pain written on your face melted, your expression falling back to pleasure as you appreciated just how full you were with his body connected to yours. When your eyes opened, not even realising you'd closed them in concentration, you found him looking at you with such pride and devotion that you couldn't help but offer him a half-lidded smile, which he returned with his usual toothy grin, making your heart soar.

“Are you ready now, my love?” He asked softly, his smile making you feel significantly less nervous, remembering that this was Jinbei, and you were safe with him.

“Y-yes,” you replied, biting your lip as he began to drag himself back out of you, and gripping the fabric of the bench below you hard as he sunk back in. His pace was agonizingly slow for both of you, barely half of his cock shealthed, the other clasper resting heavily against your abdomen and grinding against your clit with every thrust, meeting with the buldge in your abdomen that made Jinbei's eyes roll back every time he saw it, aroused by seeing himself so deep inside you.

Bit by bit he increased his pace as you grew more comfortable, whines turning to strings of loud moans and cries of his name, making tears in the fabric of the seating below you as your nails sank into it while you held on for dear life. Your entire body was being rocked back and forth as he fucked you, pollen slowly winning out over his better judgement as he lifted one of your legs and nipped at the calf. He had to put all his will power into keeping himself from sinking any deeper into you, but your hot wet walls felt so tight and devine around his cock, the soft skin of your belly giving pleasant friction to the other. The hand not holding your leg was resting at the top of the bench over your head for support, wood creaking under the strain as it threatened to break. He couldn't help but blush when he looked up and saw the fish in the aquarium watching him, a small audience as he fucked you senseless.

“Jinbeiiii,” you whined, pulling his attention from the voyeuristic fish, “I'm- I'm gonna-”

“Let go for me, my pearl,” he groaned, “I'll be right there with you, you're doing so very well”

You went practically silent as you saw white, body arching off the bench and seizing, hands reaching out and grabbing at forearms, sinking your nails into them as you came hard. You felt a swelling inside you as his clasper opened, vaguely registering through your haze as the other opened against your belly, liquid spraying out over your breasts and neck, some even splashing against your face, while more still filled you and dripped from your overstuffed cunt as Jinbei groaned and stilled. Both of you went slack, Jinbei's cocks slipping from on and in you and slapping against his thighs wetly as he pulled away, hands either side of you to keep him from crushing you. He kissed you softly, both of you unable to do any more than exhausted soft pecks in the intense afterglow of your orgasms, cum dripping down your center and leaking from your cunt, pooling on the floor beneath you as he helped you sit up a little better. He looked at the fish above you and gave them a little growl, the school quickly dissipating at threat of being eaten.

You weren't sure how long the two of you sat there in silence, panting heavily and exchanging soft kisses. At some point he redressed, using the cloths and towels you'd prepared earlier to clean you both up as best he could. He frowned at your clothes, torn in his lust-addled haze, making note to himself to replace them, before taking the cape from his kimono and wrapping it around you. He sat on the bench next to you and pulled you into his lap, and you giggled as he hand fed you snacks and water, smiling to himself at how cute you were, a light dusting of pink on his cheeks that you still seemed so trusting of him after the relatively hard fuck he'd given you. His mind felt a lot clearer, the pollen now worked out of his system, but he couldn't find any ounce of regret at what had happened, and neither could you.

[chigirizzz]

they comfort you after you had a bad day

characters: sae, kunigami, shidou, isagi

warnings/tags: angst, fluff, boyfriend material, gn! reader (gets called princess on shidou's because i feel like he would call that to anyone regardless of their gender), shidou being shidou, they're pro players, mentions of violence (shidou and kunigami's parts), swear words, pet names such as "handsome", "baby", "beautiful", "princess" and "shrimp" (you will see why lol), fake friends (shidou), burn out and violence at work (kunigami), reader's insecurities get attacked on isagi's part (it wasn't isagi tho) but no insecurities are specified

notes: sorry for any mistakes :>

»»——⍟——««

itoshi sae

"come to bed," your boyfriend, itoshi sae, called for you at the door of your study room (where you studied and did your college assignments).

"just give me one or two hours more, handsome," you answered, not even looking at his direction. your eyes were focused on your laptop screen and on your notes in front of you, getting dryer and more sensitive each minute from the amount of hours you spent in front of the screen. Your posture was... not the best.

a "tch" escaped sae's lips at your response. he knew you were lying and planing to spent the whole night studying. you always did that. sometimes he would wake up at around 3am to get some water only to notice the faint light coming out of your study room.

"what are you exactly doing anyway?" he asked when he approached you to inspect what you were typing on the laptop and reading on your notebook. he yawned and rested his hand on top of your head gently, which you didn't seem to mind. sae would occasionally do random and unusual gestures to show his love for you.

"a group project that one of my professors decided to give us today and is due in two days. but surprise surprise, my group is terrible and refuses to do anything, and when they decide to do something, it reminds you of the skills of a fifth grader." you let out everything, almost without taking a break to breathe. you inhaled anddd… exhaled. "so basically, i have to do almost everything, and it's stressing me out."

sae listened carefully to your words. he knew what you felt, sometimes he feels like he has to do all the work on a game while his teammates either seem to not give a shit or just don't know how to think rationally ("they're a bunch of assholes," he'd tell you often). he knows how annoying and stressful it is, even if he is a professional football player and you a normal university student.

"come to bed. you need rest."

a groan escaped your lips. "sae, i can't. it's a very complex project to do in a very short time, i have to do as much as i can today still so i don't get delayed." your hands grabbed a few hair strands and pulled them with some force. "and as i just told you, it's me doing most of the work. i can't rest, not yet."

he sighed. he grabbed your chin gently and made you look at him. "y/n, you and your pathetic classmates are university students, you must be mature and responsible. if they don't pursue those characteristics, then they don't deserve your time, your patience and your nice words. they can go fuck themselves." his thumb caressed your lower lip. "i would advise you to do this: you send the project's plan to your rat looking buddies and professor's email, making it clear who does what. that way, if they don't do their shit—or if they fuck up their shit—, your professor will know who actually worked hard. "he pressed a kiss on your lips and walked towards the door so he could go to your shared room. "but you do you, i guess. i'll go to bed. and fix your posture, you look like a shrimp."

about half an hour later, itoshi felt a weight on the opposite side of the bed. you thought he was already asleep, but you were surprised when his arm wrapped around your waist protectively.

"i did what you told me. we'll see how tomorrow will go..." a few seconds of silence. "thank you, sae. i love you."

he kissed you on the cheek. "hm. love you too." his words made you smile a bit and you cuddled closer to him. but of course, sae decided to ruin the moment. "shrimp."

"are you seriously gonna start calling me that?!"

no point in acting like you're offended, your boyfriend is just chuckling at your reaction.

shidou ryusei

"angry" was not enough to describe what Shidou Ryusei was feeling at that moment; Shidou felt pissed off and full of contempt, and the way you were crying on the couch in a curled up position only made him clench his fists, his blood boiling inside his dilated veins.

"i'm going to beat the shit out of them." the pink-eyed demon was never the best at comforting others, in fact, he never cared about the emotions of others, choosing instead to ignore or mock anyone who would be in a vulnerable state around him. however, you were a different case, you were his partner, and he genuinely cared about you even though he had promised himself that he didn't want "distractions" in his life. but even though you were the protagonist in his life, shidou ryusei still didn't know how to comfort a human being, so when he saw you sad after you found out that your friends had betrayed you, he decided to choose violence as a solution. "I will beat them, torture them, and then spit in their eyes."

You wiped your eyes with the back of your hand and looked at him, at his evil smirk. your hand landed on his fist in an attempt to calm him down. "ryu... no, you'll only make it worse. i'll just forget about them and move on. it's better this way." you knew he only wanted revenge for the way your fake friends made you feel, and you knew perfectly well that your boyfriend could handle a fight alone against a big group of people, but an angry shidou was an out-of-control shidou, and you didn't want any more problems (but deep down, you'd like to see them hurt).

"huh?" he arched an eyebrow, his pink eyes growing darker. "baby... didn't you get tired of crying every time your oh so dear friends ignored you and humiliated you?"

more tears were falling down your cheeks, but now you weren't sobbing or anything, you just were in silence and listening to him. your eyes and nose were red, your head hurts like a bitch, your throat was burning and you felt dizzy and dehydrated. you just wanted to sleep on the bed you shared with your boyfriend, to hold him and not let him go not even for a second.

yesterday you asked your friends on the group chat if they wanted to go to the movies with you the next day, which is today. some said they would be busy, others didn't even bother to answer. you were already used to their distant behavior. wanting to see the movie anyway and to enjoy your free time, you decided to go alone, only to find that your entire group of friends was in the same mall as you, strolling through the stores without any concern or remorse.

you confronted them but they got defensive and started saying that they didn't do anything wrong.

for months they excluded you, humiliated you, made fun of you, and even badmouthed each other—what a group of loyal friends.

shidou wiped your tears and hugged you, your face on his muscular chest, searching for warmth and comfort.

"what if they do something...like spread rumors or something...they would be capable of that."

"they won't. i won't let that happen, princess. i promise.~" he awkwardly ran a hand through your hair. a few minutes passed like that until you fell asleep. he took you to bed and tucked you under the sheets. he stared at you for a while, observing your red eyes and how you slept, hugging one of the many pillows that were on top of the bed. yeah he's definitely going to hit someone. "goodnight beautiful~." the blond pressed a kiss to your cheek and left the house silently. your friends have to pay, no matter if you were in favor of the situation or not. fortunately he knew where some of them lived.

shidou ryusei was not the best person to seek comfort from, but he was the best to make sure you felt protected.

kunigami rensuke

kunigami's attention was drawn to the front door of the house that the two of you shared. a smile formed on his lips; he knew it was you who had just come home from a long day at the office.

lately you had started coming home extremely late from work, completely tired and desperate to get to bed. however, kunigami thought that you were getting... sick—paler, dark circles under your eyes, distancing yourself from him as you didn't have any energy to spend time with him and you had a more... depressed aura. kunigami knew that you weren't well, he knew that your work was slowly consuming you, both physically and mentally.

no matter how many times he told you that it would be better to quit, you denied it, wanting to contribute to the financial state of both of you—even though your boyfriend's salary as a professional football player was more than enough—and wanting to have a life and career of your own. the ginger respected your opinion and your independence, but the way you were killing yourself—no, the way your boss was taking advantage of you made him angry.

the ginger was never the type of guy who likes violence or any kind of conflict, he always preferred to "play fair", but the idea of giving your boss a hard time was getting more and more appealing.

"hi baby," he said with a soft voice and approached you to rest his hands on your shoulders. "how are you feeling? tired? want me to cook something for you?" he looked at you, and the man's face expression went from a warm smile to worry and panic when you made eye contact with him. your eyes were red from crying, your hair was a mess.

kunigami was silent, not knowing what to do or what to say, so he just pulled you into a hug, his hand on the back of your head.

"what happened? y/n… are you ok?" he asked you in a low voice. you could feel his hot breath and his warmth—it was comforting.

"rensuke, i…" you sniffed your nose and hot tears were forming on your eyes.

he interrupted you, his hand now on top of your head, giving you a little massage on your scalp with his fingers. "shh. it's ok if you don't want to tell me. you're safe now."

but you wanted to tell him.

"i… my boss screamed at me and-and'' your sobs were interrupting your words. kunigami kept embracing you—tight enough to make you feel safe, but still careful to not hurt you or to make you uncomfortable. he knew you were a strong person, and always made sure to not be the overprotective type since you hated it and it made you feel powerless and like you lacked freedom, however, at that moment, you were clearly psychologically and physically hurt—he could see a bruise here and there on your body—; you obviously were in need of him taking care of you.

in fact, that was one thing that rensuke loved about you, you always wanted to do things your way and without much help, but if you actually were in a situation where you needed someone to help you, you wouldn't deny it or hesitate. he loves how you were so strong and independent, but still humble enough to know what you wanted and what you needed, without being afraid of telling anyone.

"and started pushing me and throwing things at me. he... he has been getting more violently each day."

the ginger spent two hours listening to you, his big arms never leaving you (unless you needed a tissue or a cup of water), whispering things like "i love you", "it's ok", "i'll protect you". you were so grateful to have him in your life.

"i'll take care of the situation." he told you. you were now cuddling on your shared bed.

"how?..."

"don't know exactly, but maybe i'll ask reo for help so he can fire your boss and make him bankrupt and lonely. you know, since reo has a lot of connections."

you chuckled at his words. "seems like a good idea to me." you kissed the tip of his nose and smiled when you saw his cheeks getting pink. "thank you, my love."

isagi yoichi

"it's ok, y/n, someone will accept you eventually." your dark haired boyfriend handed you a cup of tea to make you feel better and sat next to you on the sofa of the living room. "the most beautiful diamonds take a lot of time to form, you know?"

you chuckled at his silly attempt to cheer you up. "i don't know, yoichi… i have tried so many agencies and so far nothing."

isagi sighed. "come here." he called out to you, and when you looked at him confused, he grabbed your arms gently and made you lie on top of him, your head resting on his muscular chest, listening to his heartbeat. his arms embraced you and one of his hands gave you a small massage on your omoplates. "your muscles are so tense. relax, no need to worry, baby. someone will eventually realize how beautiful and talented you are."

for months you've been trying to join a model agency—only to be rejected every time. it made you feel hopeless and embarrassed, but you were still fighting for your dream.

today you received an email of the most recent agency you candidated to, however, this one rejecting email was a bit different… they proceeded to be unprofessional and insult everything about you, managing to hit on your insecurities and give you new insecurities.

isagi was actually the one who got a reaction—his eyes darkened, his jaw tightened, his knuckles turning white due to the amount of strength he used when clenching his fists—insisting to make them pay for their cruel words. you, on the other hand, just stared at your laptop screen—not a single movement, not even a single word.

isagi was passing around the living room insulting the model agency out loud. he then noticed how quiet you were. he calmed down and approached you, his fingers caressing your cheeks after closing the laptop.

and now you're here cuddling on the sofa. your eyes were closed, feeling his chest slowly moving up and down due to him breathing.

"you'll see, baby, you will make it. i'll be by your side the entire time."

you were so thankful for having him besides you.

[tiedyeflannels]

BTS Headcanon || The Members Playing Loteria

OT7 x reader

Word count: 1k

Masterlist

A/N: Hey! I just wanted to write a little blurb while I'm working on the next installment of Blind Date(s)! @maple-leaves-in-the-wind and I came up with this and it was super fun to think about how they would be if they played loteria.

For those who don't know loteria, here's a quick run-down: It's basically bingo, but with betting. You have a set amount (usually a few cents) that you pay per "bingo" card (you can have multiple cards) and you pile the money in the middle. You, then, have someone calling the cards (numbers in bingo) and you win by filling a row either vertically, horizontally, or diagonally and get the money from the middle. Basic bingo rules. At the very end of the game, there is one last round where you pay a good amount of money for each card. The higher the amount, the bigger the pot, the higher the stakes. You win the final pot by filling out the ENTIRE card (think blackout bingo).

Playing loteria with the members would best be described in one word…

CHAOTIC

If RUN BTS has taught us anything, it’s that they are competitive

I’m talking shouting

Blaming

Demanding recounts (looking through each card that was called)

Demanding their money back if they think that the person who’s always winning every round (most likely you) is cheating

The WHOLE nine yards

And speaking of money…

Broke millionaires

When you said that everyone would be buying a card at 25 cents a pop, they immediately start running around whoever’s house (or the shared dorm) that you’re playing at and digging in between the couch cushions for change

Though you had told them about this game DAYS in advance

“Spare change? Spare change, ma’am?”

And don’t even get me started on how much is going into the final pot

Someone Tae suggests that they should pay 5 bucks a card and everyone becomes DEFENSIVE

Get ready for some arguments to break out

"Alright, should we do one final round before we call it a night,” I asked, looking around the table, slightly chuckling at some of the members' hair.

It was mainly the maknae line that had their hair sticking in every direction from the amount of times they had run their hands through it. I collected the cards from near the middle of the table so I could shuffle them as Namjoon pushed the pot money over to me.

Everyone nodded at the question.

“Alright! How much should we pay per card,” I asked as I shuffled the deck.

Taehyung was quick to answer, “5 bucks!”

Everyone’s head shot up at the suggestion while Jungkook, Jimin and Hobi abruptly stood up, almost knocking over their chairs.

"Absolutely not!” “That is too much money!”

I giggled as Jimin and Tae started to bicker and the others sat back down.

“5 bucks? Do you know how many ramen packs I can get with that,” Jungkook argued.

“I’m gonna have to side with Jungkook on this one. I don’t want to pull from my retirement fund yet,” Yoongi said, leaning back and crossing his arms.

“Yeah we don’t want to do that, he’s gonna need it soon,” Jin chimed in.

Yoongi threw a glare at him, “You’re older than me, you know that?”

I bursted out laughing at the disgusted face Jin made before Namjoon started telling us to calm down.

We looked over to him as he stated a proposal, “How about we do 2 dollars a card?”

“I’m down,” I said, taking out 2 dollars from my wallet.

Everyone followed my lead and started to dig around for their wallets before pulling out the amount they were going to pay. I put my two dollars in the middle of the table and got rid of my other two cards, leaving me with the one. I looked around as everyone was sorting their things and stopped at Jungkook.

“I only have a 5 dollar bill,” he said with a pout.

“Do you want 3 cards because I can give you a dollar or if you don’t, just take the change from the pile,”I offered.

He nodded, placing the five in the middle, “I’ll take three cards!” I nodded and pulled out another dollar from my wallet, throwing it in the middle.

Looking around, Hobi, Jimin and Tae had two cards, Jungkook had three, and Namjoon, Yoongi, Jin and I had one which made the grand total: 26 dollars.

“Alright, are we ready,” I asked as everyone nodded. I was about to call a card, but Hobi stopped me.

“Wait, can someone else call the cards?”

I looked at him, confused, “Why?”

“Because you’re the only one that’s been calling cards and you’ve won almost every round.”

“That’s because no one wants to call the cards, but if it makes you feel better… I’ll let you shuffle,” I said, moving to hand him the cards, “And Namjoon can call out the cards, okay?”

I looked over to Namjoon for confirmation as Hobi started to shuffle the deck, he nodded. Once Hobi was done shuffling he handed them over to Namjoon, who started to call out the cards.

It had been a while and no one had cleared their entire card yet, so I looked over and saw that Namjoon had already gone through half of the deck.

“How has no one won yet,” I asked, looking down at my car, that only needed a few more spots to be filled and then looked around.

“I don’t know, but I only need a couple more to win,” Jimin spoke up and the other nodded in agreement.

A few more cards were laid down and the tension was building. Everyone was on the edge of their seats as Namjoon started to near the end of the deck until…

“Buenas!” I cheered as I covered the last spot I needed to completely fill out my card. The guys groaned and fell back into their chairs as I happily collected the money.

“That’s not fair,” Tae groaned.

I laughed, “That’s how it goes.”

I grabbed my wallet and got up, “Well I’m hungry, so I’m gonna go to the convenience store.”

Jungkook and Tae shot up, following me immediately.

“Can you get us something,” Jungkook asked as they both looked at me with puppy dog eyes.

I squinted before sighing, “Fine.”

I was about to step through the door, but stopped and looked at the others, “Are you guys gonna come too?”

They all got up and followed me to the door. I sighed again as we started to walk to the convenience store.

“I’m only getting you ramen, okay?”

“Yay," they all cheered.

[pannman]

Could I request something where Valentino says he'll pay for ftm readers' testosterone and surgeries (top and bottom) if he signs a contract saying he'll work for him after everything heals.

I haven't done a Valentino fic in a while

The Offer

Tw: brief mentions of gender dysphoria and body dysphoria, swearing, Valentino being Valentino

Willing to do a part 2 later with more yandere themes if you guys like this one

Hell wasn't exactly a place filled with great health care insurance. There weren't many decent jobs. You were desperate for a job that would help pay for your transition. You knew you weren't the most qualified to work as in IT support at Voxtech. The most experience you had was some customer service experience working in fast food. And you were sure the competition would be stiff. But you knew a good first impression can do wonders

So with your best business casual clothes (that you could afford), a polished up resume, and a dozen practice sessions behind you, you arrived early for your interview

Just as you thought, you were NOT the only one interested in this position. You sat and waited, carefully thinking about your answers to potential questions

You were the last one interviewed. You were expecting Vox to be at the interview. You weren’t sure why. You just thought he'd be present. Instead it was two people in upper management who worked for him instead

"Hello, there Mr. Y/N, you are our last interview for tonight." The man who's sinner form looked similar to an eel of some kind shook your hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you" you replied trying to hold back yourself from talking too much. You were nervous and desperate and it made you want to ramble or try too hard. But you needed to remain appearing calm and professional

The older woman who had a frog like appearance looked rather bored and tired as she didn't say anything yet. The man decided to begin with the first question. "So what made you interested in this position?" He asked. You told him that you liked Voxtech and the innovations associated with it and that you were excited at the opportunity to be a part of it. This was true but it wasn't the real reason which you chose to keep private for now

The woman finally spoke. "You and everyone other applicant here" she spoke in an unamused tone. You knew it was a basic answer but you didn't feel comfortable exposing your identity at that time and it was the only other answer that had some truth to it

The man continued "do you have any technological experience?" You were dreading this question but still you answered as best you could. "No, I worked in customer service before though IT is a new field for me, but I'm very eager to learn" you said with a smile. You kept your posture straight and tried to keep your body relaxed. You wanted to project confidence

"Apparently not eager enough to learn before coming here" the woman commented rolling her eyes. You were beginning to worry. She clearly didn't like you or was in a bad mood from interviewing all day. Hopefully you could get her on your side and it wouldn't hurt your chances

The man gave the woman an uncomfortable glance. Before returning to his questions. "So, what could say would set you apart from our other applicants?" He asked. You thought about what you would say to this question. "Well, I'm really good at making connections, I work well with people and I am good at teamwork. I'm willing work hard to earn my place here" you said hoping it would be enough

The woman gave an annoyed chuckle. The man gathered his papers. "Thank you for coming in. We'll give you a call if we are interested." He said as he led you out. "Don't quit your day job just yet" you heard the woman say just you exited

You were pretty sure you did not get the job even before you had left the building. You headed down the hall and realized you had to use the restroom. You stopped to talk to the secretary and asked where the bathroom was

She pointed in the general direction without glancing up from her phone. Great! Another cheerful, delightful person...

You went down the hallway to the right. You didn't see a bathroom. You turned left hoping it was the right direction and soon you could hear someone yelling. You turned left still not seeing a bathroom so you continued further. You headed to turn right at the end of the hall when you collided with someone. Someone quite tall.

"Who the fuck isn't watching where they are-" the tall moth sinner paused when saw you. You recognized him immediately as the one the vees. Valentino.

"Well... my apologies, I shouldn't been storming out in a blind rage." His demeanor changed and a razor sharp smile spread across his face. He lowered an arm to help you up. You took it. Not exactly wanting to piss him off after he was about to bite your head off. Or something worse. "Tell me, what brings a such muy gaupo man to my part of the building?"

How lost were you? You stammered a bit. He made you nervous. You weren't sure if it was his angry outburst earlier or the fact that he towered over you but something about him seemed.... dangerous. I mean he was an overlord. He was dangerous

"I-i... I had an interview for a position at Voxtech." You finally managed to say. You felt his hand on your back guiding you (almost straight up pushing you) along with him as he walked and talked. He asked you how the interview went

"Good..." Your fake confidence was failing you now as you were incredibly nervous and uncomfortable in his presence. "Oh, poor bambino, was it that bad?" He asked in a tone of worry that was if he'd known you longer than 5 minutes

You decided that lying to him wasn't working. "I don't really have any experience for the job. And don't think one of the interviewers liked me much" you admitted. You felt a hand on your shoulder and you looked up to see him grinning down at you. He had barely touched you yet it felt like he was being touchy. You shrunk in his gaze. "Why do you want a job cooped up in some office anyway?" He asked. You thought about your answer to his question. You sighed. "I liked the benefits. The pay is good, so is the health insurance...." You trailed off

He seemed to read you like a book. "Money and health insurance. You got an illness or something?" He didn't seem to actually think you had an illness. He was probing you. And you didn't know how to think properly right now. "Its... for testosterone... and surgery..." You weren't sure if he was going to know what you were talking about. "So, you trying to get the right parts hmm?" Oh, he did know

"Well, you know..." he continued "my porn stars get superior health coverage. If you work for me you could get the same package. And one day have your own... package" he said the last part in a tone that sounded lustful and you didn't really think this was a good idea. But, you had tried everything. This was your first job offer that actually had good benefits. Interview after interview. Let down after let down. Maybe this was all you could get. Maybe this was the best you'll ever be...

"Ok... it-it sounds like a good option I guess" you stuttered. His eyes lit up like something predatory had awakened inside them. "Great! I'll draw up the paperwork. Follow me" he didn't trudge ahead instead once again guiding you along with him this time with a firm grip on your side as if he was worried you'd take off. And you definitely had considered it

He led you to his studio. People were on set everywhere. You were no stranger to sex but even this was getting you quite flustered. He led you into his office and pulled out a contract from the drawer under his desk

You don't know why you did it. You didn't see any other way. You wanted to finally feel right in your body. To like who you see in the mirror. And even though every instinct was telling you not to, you signed it...

Valentino watched you and flashed a dangerous grin "good boy. I just can't wait to get started..."

[thegratefulsouth]

I've been thinking about this moment in Bonds a lot.

Because it's the moment, I think, that is the purest of intention, from Daryl's part, during this whole sequence. I know you beautiful Carylers have already been over this with a fine tooth comb, but I gotta play all the broken records. Daryl's not trying to look into her bag, to find the gun (not yet), he's not trying to find out what she's really doing. He's not worried about her, as a friend (who is in love with her), or whatever. He's just told her that it's not like that with Connie and he is very clear about this. He needs Carol to know exactly how clear he is about this. His eye contact could not be more deliberate. And he's not disappointed about it, he's not longing for someone else, he's not trying to change the subject, embarassed, he's not trying to brush her off.

He looks at her with the same stillness (as per MM's recount) and intensity that he does when he tells her that he loves her.

And that long sigh. Good lord that says, Carol you don't understand. He gazes hopefully in her direction when she tells him he doesn't have to be alone. But then she's talking about someone else again, and her dog, and Daryl looks back at Carol, considering this, before knocking the can over, properly this time. He tried.

Also, he has just checked in with Ezekiel in the previous episode, "You gonna ask about Carol?" To which Ezekiel responded, "Nah," and shook his head, and walked away.

Daryl will always ask about Carol.

So he knows the timing is so close to being right for them. It is for Daryl. But he also knows Carol's not at peace, and that holds him back. And so he's just basically begging her to see him. He wants so badly to be enough for her. Through that whole season.

After this, he whacks Carol on the leg. Exuberantly. Even though she's sitting right next to him. He says "Hey." I could obsess over his need to touch her like that.

The force of his gesture reminds me of this:

And Carol's hand immediately goes out to touch herself, where he bumped her leg.

Thanks beautiful people for the gifs.

[blackstarchanx3new]

FSR rambles 24

Back into Blue and Dark's meeting.

Dark Link is speechless at Blue's emotional state.

The face of "What the hell is wrong with you" if I've ever seen one, while also coming to the realization HE'S a part of what's wrong with Blue rn.

Just shyly mumbling he wasn't even TRYING to upset Blue, he was just venting his own feelings about the situation, realizing they hurt Blue a LOT no matter how much Blue needed to hear that shit.

Dark has a moment of clarity realizing they're both "Only good for hurting people huh?"

He realizes without even TRYING he did exactly what he promised Green he WOULDN'T DO.

He lied to him.

And it just makes him feel like crap mindlessly muttering "What do I do now?"

He's aimless and Blue feels much the same way.

He doesn't know how to grapple with the reality he was just smacked in the face with.

Dark's forgetting not everyone lives in his head mumbling to himself.

"...No you don't really like that huh?"

Earning a "huh?" from Blue because...what's this dude talking about now lmfao.

Dark clarifies, that he knows Blue doesn't like hugs.

Which BLUE clarifies he doesn't HATE them.

Both feeling pretty awkward and unsure after the exchange they just shared.

Blue's still feeling kind of defensive clearly.

Also Blue's eye shifted to Link's. It goes in and out for a few pages before staying as Link's eye.

Learning that Blue in fact doesn't HATE hugs, he offers one, saying it'd make him feel better.

The reason Dark assumed Blue DOESN'T like hugs is due to Red often forcing affection onto Blue and Blue responding negatively. (Especially in the OG FS) he doesn't hate physical affection, just when it's forced upon him.

...Reasonable question yet again Blue...

When Dark doubles down on the hug offer Blue realizes he's dealing with a weirdo and leans in.

He takes a few steps forward and is willing to hear Dark out on what he meant about Green now that Blue's feeling calmer.

Dark FINALLY introduces himself properly to Blue, just flopping his head into Blue's chest in exhaustion.

He follows this up by wrapping his arms around Blue and asks him if he can just go home now.

Dark at this point is very emotionally exhausted and it shows. Blue doesn't resist the hug but starts to retrospect the fight they just had.

Coming to the realization he and Dark were basically making a feedback loop of anger in the moment.

Dark breaks the tension in Blue's mind by clarifying he's not mad anymore and shows a bit of sympathy with "Bad stuff is always happening to you too" In reference to Blue...basically being hurt every 5 seconds in the OG FS (If you take a shot every time Blue is harmed in the OG four swords manga ya just might die)

Blue's touchstarved ass can't handle being hugged and tries to divert the conversation by tough guy saying "OH i can handle anything!" which Dark Link just shuts down X'D

Blue's trying really hard to push this guy away, at least emotionally.

While Dark is just, not meeting him with his anger at this point.

Him thinking Blue would be worried about the other's opinions, and trying to relate with "I wish people told me I was good too"

it's kind of vague what he means there but the implication is that he wishes people appreciated his work too, that people recognized what he did and Blue feels much the same. Somebody would just say "hey, you're doing great"

The want for praise and mutual admiration.

And he just bluntly tells Blue he thinks he's great.

Dark really does have a good opinion of the colors removed from the anxieties he basically plays tennis with XD

Blue obviously responds with anger at the blatant confession, cause Blue can't handle direct compliments. (he can't handle a lot of things XDDD)

He denies he cares at all about what Dark Link thinks about him. Who's this random guy to tell him shit anyway?

But being told this stuff DOES affect him.

And we get more of Dark Link's blatant jealousy.

It's a character trait that's often looped back to but Dark is EXTREAMLY jealous of the other Links.

He wants to be like them and have what they have but is far less explosive than Shadow about it.

He's more honest about what he wants vs the more brash "I'm just gonna take it" approach.

He's bitter at what he doesn't have, but instead of taking it out on the colors he often just stews in a growing self hatred.

His injury from Blue will come up again after his meeting with Vio.

The injury to his shoulder is a reflection of how his body reacts to the Four Sword on a smaller scale.

The four Sword damages him IMENSLY because he's a curse. He's a demon, an entity the four sword tries to seal and destroy.

It's something further to note that Green and Shadow are mentioned by Dark to BE his family, but Dark makes the mention he has no family that LOVES HIM here. At least, Dark rejects the idea Green or Shadow love him.

Dark's want to be a part of a family and BE LOVED loops back to his main goals being "I wanna kiss someone", physical contact and emotional vulnerability.

I usually hinge on the silly side of Dark's inherit desire for "kisses" and all the characters have dismissed this as a silly thing Dark wants, but that's kinda IGNORANT on their ends.

Dark doesn't JUST want to shallowly kiss someone he considers "hot" or attractive, he wants to be close enough with someone that they'd wanna do something that you'd associate with it. He wants someone to love him.

It's less about the action itself and more the idea behind it he's interested in.

Dark Link's desires inherently completely contradict his existence as a curse that destroys someone's mind, because Vaati's wish was extremely confused.

He's VAATI's vision of the IDEA of "Link" mixed with his hatred, his fears and desires for freedom.

And being a living contradiction really ends up messing with Dark's mind and mentality down the road.

because coaxing doesn't work...Dark Link diverts to his usual tactics.

Emotional manipulation.

He knows what will push Blue's buttons and acts accordingly to get Blue to act the way he wants and from his grin he's extremely pleased with himself.

Blue realizes too late Dark is playing him completely.

This guy can read him and get him to respond the way HE wants. And Blue just doesn't know how to react to that.

Blue's extremely defensive, feeling foolish as hell rn due to falling into Dark's trap.

Dark only pushes him further because this is amusing to him. XD

Blue comes to a real stand still with Dark because unlike the other colors, Dark matches his energy.

Despite his power, Dark Link doesn't take his threats seriously.

None of Blue's usual tactics work against Dark.

Getting mad, physical violence, in general being unpleasant just doesn't deter Dark Link at all.

Vaati's his master this should be a given XDDD

So Blue met his match and he doesn't know what to do because now he feels a twisted form of respect for this freak.

The line about Dark giving Green that flower so he could EAT IT will always be pretty funny to me because like...Dark wtf is wrong with you XD

Blue's face just about sums up the normal person's reaction to that.

Blue reached his limit for nonsense and accidentally pushed Dark's off button.

If you aren't in the know about Dark's weird reaction to head pats:

It's the ONLY real kind physical encouragement Vaati has given him through the series.

So it's something Dark Link seeks out.

Which is why when Blue goes to stop, Dark Link hesitates to let him but does leave flustered.

I'd be confused too buddy.

There was a lot of mixed messages given during their time together XD

[theamityelf]

the survivors watching despair disease makoto in the simulation fuck everything up. His entire behavior reminded me that byakuya played with the crime scene in ch 2 of thh. Please can we have the real world reaction to despair disease makoto of the survivors (+maybe komaru...in my heart she's home by the time the neo world takes place.)

That's amazing. You've painted a picture for me where all of the other survivors, and also Komaru, are in the pod room watching the screens, and I like that a lot.

Makoto wakes up early, the morning he first comes down with despair disease, and he walks straight out the door, visibly clammy and in his pajamas.

"Something's wrong," Komaru says.

"W-What is it?" Toko asks, immediately covering her eyes. "Did someone die?"

"No, it's Makoto. He just...woke up and left his cabin. He didn't spend forever in the bathroom, he didn't even put shoes on, and he hates walking outside barefoot ever since the thumbtack incident. Hey, what's he doing?"

"It looks like he's ringing Nanami's doorbell," Kyoko observes. "A lot."

"Maybe he had one of those memory-dreams and he knows why he's in there, now?" Aoi suggests.

"That's...not the impression I get from his expression. He almost looks like he's doing it for no reason."

Indeed, he's walked away from the door by the time she opens it to see what's going on. When she eventually returns to bed, he goes and rings the doorbell again.

"Why's he ding-dong-ditching Chiaki?" Hiro wonders.

"Um..." Alter Ego looks nervous. "It looks like something's...wrong with him."

"Well, yeah. That's what we just-"

"Quiet, Hiro," Kyoko interrupts tersely. "What do you mean by that?"

"Well," Alter Ego continues, "Junko's virus seems like it's messing with his personality somehow. It's not just him; there are two others. It seems like it all comes down to that mysterious variable I told you about yesterday. That boolean, named 'dd', set to false for everyone. Well, an hour ago it was set to true for Makoto and two others. I've been going through all references to 'dd' in the code-"

"I thought you said it wasn't referenced anywhere," Byakuya protests.

"It wasn't. In the past two hours, she added conditionals that check for whether dd is set to true at any given time, and if it is-"

"He's throwing lawn chairs into the pool," Komaru observes.

"He looks sick," Aoi says. "Like he's going to pass out."

And after another minute of increasingly short-winded problem-causing, Makoto indeed collapses next to the hotel pool, basically just laying there in direct sunlight and feeling terrible.

The first few people on their way to breakfast ask him what he's up to, and he just says that he doesn't feel like getting up yet. Eventually, someone carries him into the hotel because he is drenched in sweat and so breathless he can barely talk.

When Monokuma explains the despair disease to everyone, those outside the simulation are all furious.

"Despair disease?" Kyoko protests. "Even for her, that-"

"That's not fair!" Komaru exclaims.

Inside the simulation, everyone is figuring out who has the disease.

"...and, Makoto," Hajime says. "You must have it, too."

Makoto, with his face resting on the breakfast table, says, "Have what?"

"D-Do you f-feel sick?" Mikan asks, tilting her head (and lowkey excited at the prospect that her friend needs her).

"I don't know, do I?" Makoto says.

"He's definitely not acting like himself," Hajime says.

"To be fair, that could just be a symptom of laying out in the sun for so long," Nagito points out.

"That's a good point," Makoto says. "You should all listen to Nagito more."

"Oh, he is sick," Nagito says, with a slightly disturbed look.

Outside the simulation:

"Can it be undone?" Byakuya demands.

"Once the variable is set to true, it can't be reverted until a murder happens," Alter Ego says helplessly.

"Can you keep it from being set to true for anyone else, in the future?" Kyoko asks.

"I can stop her from manually setting them to true, but the disease is coded to be contagious. I can't change that without giving up the bandwidth I'm using to maintain the rule system."

"Meaning, until another murder happens, despair disease is going to keep existing and spreading." Kyoko rubs her forehead in frustration, watching the onscreen Makoto flail around to make it harder for the others to carry him to the hospital.

[anatee]

INSUFFERABLE | General Hux x Reader | pt. 6

INSUFFERABLE | General Hux x Reader Smut. 18+. MINORS DNI. This is a direct continuation. I’m back, girlies and I wrote this somewhere in between the preparations for my real book to be published very soon. There will be more parts, of course, I'm still deciding if I want to destroy the Starkiller or not break his heart this time.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Word count: 6.48K

Content warning: fem!reader x Hux; Force Awakens plot but everything happens much slower; soft Hux with feelings appears but he is also a bastard; a few curse words; smut: fingering, oral (f receiving), face sitting, this part is sponsored by Hux being the giver basically

"Come with me. I have something you'd like in my bedroom."

Bloody Hux. He knew exactly what to say to keep her going and all riled up, even after absolutely ravishing her just minutes earlier.

"A surprise? Another one? You sure know how to keep me on my toes."

Hux smiled smugly, then beckoned her to follow him to his bedroom. There, she immediately noticed a new piece of black and red furniture standing opposite the bed.

"A holotable?" she asked in surprise. It was one of the largest types she knew the First Order used, new and polished.

"Precisely." Hux entered, and the door closed behind him. "I had it installed today. Now we can... Watch things, should you wish."

A warm smile spread on Y/N's face at the mere thought. "It would be lovely to watch something with you and just relax..."

"Then we'll do just that."

She held his gaze for a moment, allowing warmth to fill her up completely. She walked up to him and cupped his face, then left a soft, affectionate kiss on his lips.

"You've been really spoiling me lately... But I can't say that I complain."

He let out a sigh, then offered her a soft smile, again experiencing some feelings he had never felt before. "Maybe I like doing it."

"I'll go take a shower before this then... Unless you want to join me?"

As much as he enjoyed the offer, he already had a plan.

"Go, I'll order dinner for us in the meantime."

"Always efficient planning." She nodded in admiration, then smirked. "I can see why they made you a general."

He shook his head, but allowed himself a smile. "You like walking on thin ice, don't you?"

She grinned at him. "Because we're on an ice planet, General."

Before he could reply, she grabbed something from the wardrobe and disappeared behind the bathroom's door. He couldn't stop smiling; she was a little bastard at times, and he had punished people for much less before. Yet, when she teased him like this, it was so enjoyable, it made his heart light, it made the stress from his body evaporate... He couldn't get enough of it.

Twenty minutes later Y/N came back to the bedroom in an outfit that made Hux raise an eyebrow.

"Is that my shirt?" he asked, adjusting his position on the bed, where he was sitting with the remote in hand.

She just smiled, adjusting the large, black shirt that covered her butt just barely, acting as a very comfortable nightgown.

"Maybe."

"You have your own wardrobe here and you're still stealing my clothes?" he asked as if he did not enjoy the view. Her legs were exposed completely, and it would be a lie to say she didn't look attractive in the unusual attire.

"But this is large, comfy, it smells like you and... Oh, tell me you don't like how I look," she argued, then settled herself on the bed, right next to him, her warm legs enjoying the cool feeling of his luxurious sheets.

"If you need new clothes, I can order them for you," he said to tease her, but at the same time, his offer was serious.

"Very funny."

"I was serious, though." He looked at her. "Is there anything you need?"

She cocked an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know. Clothes, cosmetics, anything else of that sort? I told you I can order these for you."

"You... Would do that?"

"Y/N. You had probably noticed by now how much I'd do for you."

Her mouth fell agape. Of course, he had given her gifts before, but hearing such words was a completely different experience. She swallowed hard, trying to calm her heart.

"I don't want you to think I'm with you for all these perks."

"I never thought that," he replied immediately. "And I am offering. Who else am I going to give gifts to? Ren, maybe?"

Y/N couldn't help but let out a short chuckle. "Oh, I think he'd appreciate a gift just from you."

"Don't even make me imagine that." Hux visibly shuddered at the thought. "Y/N... Love," he began, making her feel even more excited, "I do not know much about all of this, but I know I want to care for you. And you know I have the resources to do so. And don't worry, I told you I have a trusted vendor."

Her heart melted as she gazed into his eyes, taking in the words that made her fall for him even more.

"You're wonderful, you know that?"

He chuckled quietly. "Say that to your dear friend Kylo."

Having said that, he passed her his datapad, smiling softly all the time. Hux took great pride in knowing that he made her this happy; it made him almost as satisfied as using the Starkiller weapon, and he was fascinated to discover these new feelings he had never had for anyone before.

"Choose something for yourself," he said, having opened the app through which she could make orders. While she started browsing, he turned on his new holo table, searching for something for them to watch.

"Oh, I know!" she said after a moment of scrolling through everything. "I'll order sheet masks."

Hux raised an eyebrow, taking a glance at the datapad's screen. "Sheet... What?"

"It's a skincare product. We'll use them together. They'll help you relax, promise. How about one with a porg on?"

He gave her a look of disbelief. "The General of the First Order with a porg mask on?"

She grinned mischievously, his response only making her want it more. "I can't wait to see that."

He shook his head, yet did nothing to stop her when she started choosing the masks. As long as he could have them delivered as something classified, there was nothing to be worried about.

Classified porg sheet masks.

"Oh, there came some message for you," she said, seeing a notification pop up on the screen. Hux didn't even glance at it, his eyes focused on the holo. He trusted her completely, hence allowed her to read the message, not very concerned about whether it was something classified or not.

"What is it?"

"It's Mitaka," she replied, having opened the message. "It's a severe snowstorm again... Should I send them an order?"

Hux rolled his eyes. "They can handle that themselves, idiots."

"So I will just tell him to fuck off..." She smiled, ready to type the message. "Officially, of course," she added quickly, having received a stern look from Armitage.

"Feisty, aren't you?"

"Learning from you."

"I do not swear on duty."

"And am I on duty now, General?"

He let out a sigh, but a smile was dancing at the corners of his mouth as he looked at her with genuine affection. "What would I do without you and these snarky comments of yours?"

She shrugged. "Bore yourself to death."

After that, she moved even closer to him, then placed a long, passionate kiss on his lips, one that left them both feeling a bit intoxicated. It was an unspoken confirmation that all this banter was there because of how much they cared for one another.

"It felt like you needed that," she whispered, barely parting from his lips, and he nodded.

"I did," he replied before repaying her with a kiss full of even more emotions than before.

She turned back to the datapad, sent the message to Mitaka and then finished choosing the products she wanted.

"That would be all." She passed him the datapad again. "If it's too many, I can remove them..."

"Too many?" He raised an eyebrow, looking at the screen. "You chose less than ten products."

"Because I don't want to take it all for granted..."

He sighed, shaking his head. "Seems like I need to add some myself."

He clicked a few buttons swiftly, then left the datapad on the night stand. "Ordered. Everything should be here tomorrow."

"Thank you, Armitage," she whispered, kissing him on the cheek. Then she leaned her head against his shoulder to watch whatever he had chosen.

For a while, they watched the holo in silence, until Armitage's hand began to wander. At first, he just rested it on her thigh, then began massaging it, glancing at her just barely as if to ask for permission. She only smiled in response, doing nothing to stop him, so he allowed himself to keep going.

She had a feeling just touching her thigh may not be enough for him. He had been teasing her all day, and it seemed like he was nowhere near the end.

Hux's hand soon wandered underneath the shirt she was wearing, and he very quickly noticed it was... Just the shirt.

He shot her a stern look. "No underwear again."

She smiled at him, trying to look innocent, but he could see it all in her eyes. "It's healthy to sleep that way..."

"Surely," he replied before quickly placing his hand in between her legs, making her let out a small gasp.

And there he was, using his hands just like she wanted him to. His fingers were putting pressure in all the right places, circling her clit and folds carefully, pulling out the quietest whimpers from her. With every precise move of his finger, she became more and more excited, and he could feel the wetness growing rapidly.

"Quick today, hm?" He chuckled, finding his fingers already glistening with her arousal.

"You had me sensitive all day..."

"Oh, I'm not saying it's a bad thing. Means I get to do this..."

He easily slipped his finger inside her, earning a moan that satisfied him greatly. It somehow turned him on, him pumping his finger in and out of her while they were both pretending to still watch whatever he put on. But did he even care for the show? The sighs, the moans and the slightly wet sounds of his finger moving against her soaked folds was all he needed to keep himself entertained.

"The food is taking long today, isn't it?" he asked, knowing very well she wouldn't be able to give 

him a coherent answered as her moans grew louder, her chest raising and falling faster and faster as she quivered with arousal.

"Right there," she breathed out, throwing her head back against the headboard. "Please, keep rubbing right there..."

"There?" he asked with a mischievous smile on his face as he glanced over at her. Two of his fingers were going in and out of her at a rapid pace as his other hand kept on rubbing against her clit, just in the right places, as if he had a scanner to check which spots would bring her most pleasure. When he noticed even more wetness, he ignored her pleading him not to stop and took his hands away. She let out a shaky breath.

"No, no, Armitage, I beg you, let me..."

"I will, Y/N," he smirked, seeing the desparation in her eyes. "But I want to clean you up this time."

Before she could ask what he meant exactly, he adjusted his position on the bed to lay flat and indicated the spot above his face.

"Get over here."

Her mouth dropped as she realised what he wanted to do, but she had absolutely nothing against it.

"Gladly..." She slowly crawled towards him. "But you might just drive me crazy from everything that happened today."

"Maybe that's what I want," he replied without an ounce of hesitation, making her smirk as she put her knees on both sides of his head, then held onto the headboard to keep her pussy right above his mouth.

She could feel his hot breath against her sensitive skin as he chuckled, seemingly content with her position.

"Now that is quite the view."

Even just these words were enough to give her goosebumps. She could feel each of his breaths against her, and it made it harder to keep herself steady in that position. Before she could recover, his breaths were replaced by his tongue, making her whimper.

He was licking her all over, tasting, savouring both her and the moment, making sure not to miss a spot. The helpless moves of her hips, a clear indication of begging for more between the moans and the whispers, made him want to give her even greater pleasure. He knew how sensitive she was after everything that happened earlier in the day, and oh well, he wanted to exhaust her with pleasure.

He slid his tongue inside her, grabbing her hips at the same time and allowing her to ride it. She had never tried something like that before, but stars, this was one of the most pleasurable experiences her body was blessed to have. She kept on rocking her hips against his mouth, her nails digging into the headboard as she felt the inevitable building up, faster than ever before.

A loud, electronical buzz seared through the air, muting their heavy breathing just for a moment.

"It must be the food..." she uttered between the gasps as Hux's licks send a shiver after shiver through her body.

"I don't fucking care," he rasped against her, his hot breath making the sensations almost unbearably pleasurable.

"Hux!" she cried out without thinking, overwhelmed by the feeling of his tongue coming into contact with her overstimulated clit again.

And then it all stopped. She felt him back down as his grip on her hips tightened to the white of his knuckles.

"What did you just call me?"

His tone was almost sinister, sending a shiver down her spine. There was no Armitage that she knew anymore, it was General Hux of the First Order, speaking as if her life depended on his mercy. And at first, she got scared, her mind still clouded by pleasure... But then she remembered she had nothing to be afraid of, and smirked.

"Hux," she repeated proudly, holding onto the headboard and feeling his breathing against her wetness. "Is it high treason?"

"Yes."

"What is the punishment?"

He didn't reply—instead, he gripped her as tightly as he could and forgot about licking. He was devouring her at this point, sucking and grazing her folds and clit with his teeth, pulling a moan after moan of both pleasure and pain out of her throat. Her hair was sticking to her forehead, sweat dripping down as it took more and more of her power to keep herself above him and not just smash his face with her thighs. At this point, it only took a few more licks, a few more rubs of his fingers and she let go, crying out his name again. It shook her body to the core, emptying her mind of any thoughts; there was nothing but that incredible pleasure running through her veins.

She could not see it, but she could almost sense the smirk Hux had on his face after all of this. She fell onto the mattress next to him, helpless, exhausted and wet all over, her thighs burning along with her overstimulated pussy, her mind not allowing her any coherent thought.

Hux wiped his mouth, then watched her chest raise and fall quickly with satisfaction. Then, as if nothing happened, he left the room to finally receive their food.

When he came back, he stopped in the door to adore the sight he had created. Y/N was still on the bed trying to catch her breath, both her hair and the sheets a complete mess. Her skin was glistening with sweat, just like her folds which were still soaked.

"Look at you." He smirked triumphantly. "A little mess, aren't you?"

She raised her head slightly and looked at him in disbelief. "It's your fault."

"I'm not particularly sorry for what I did." He looked clearly amused as he set the tray with food on his night stand. "You enjoyed every second."

She just rolled her eyes, knowing he was right. Although exhausted, she sat up slowly and watched him walk to the bathroom. He came out of it quickly with a black towel. He then began wiping her skin, gently and tenderly, as if he didn't almost bruise her hips mere minutes earlier.

"Thank you," she said quietly when he finished, giving him a peck on the cheek. He smiled softly and walked back to the bathroom to get rid of the towel and wash his own face.

Soon they were eating on the bed, again, finally actually watching what Hux had put on. Both of them were happy, intoxicated with each other, exchanging pointed looks every few seconds. That day was a hell of a rollercoaster, full of pleasure, but also some pure feelings... Of something strong swirling between them.

They were just about to finish their food when Armitage's datapad buzzed. He looked at it, and Y/N watched a smirk form on his face.

"Oh, look at them. Seems like they managed to tackle the snowstorm without me." He rolled his eyes and put the datapad away as she giggled.

She loved that man.

For the next week, Y/N was not allowed the luxury of seeing or talking to Hux at all. He was busier than ever, with Starkiller preparing for a next attack and Kylo walking around, huffing and puffing because the scavenger girl he apparently needed so much was nowhere to be found, just like the droid.

Never before had she missed him this much. She could do with anything, just a look, a smile, she didn't even dare wish for a touch. He yearned for her just as much if not more, but was overwhelmed with duties, briefings, reports, and everything else. She got to speak to Kylo more than to her lover, and Ren was not in a particularly good mood, as his search was still failing.

It was a standard, cold evening on Starkiller when Y/N threw herself onto her bed still in her uniform, exhausted after her shift. Changing clothes seemed like too much of a task then, so she just stayed there and picked up her datapad. Oh, laying in Armitage's bed, especially in his arms, would be the perfect cure for this day...

She didn't normally approach him, usually he initiated their meetings because of safety reasons. However... She could send him a message, right? Even if he were busy, he could respond whenever he had the time...

Y/N didn't think about it much. She opened the private channel and sent him one simple message that conveyed everything she was feeling.

I miss you.

She sighed as she saw the message got marked as delivered. What now? He could not respond for hours, if at all. She was already trying to gather some will to go to the bathroom, when suddenly, her datapad buzzed. 

He replied.

Then why don't you come and show me how much you miss me?

Her heart began racing immediately as she sat up on the bed. Energy began flowing through her at once, the tiredness long gone. She typed a reply as quickly as possible.

Where are you?

His reply came just as quickly.

In the briefing room.

She bit her lip. They have never met there before.

Alone?

Again, an immediate reply to her hopeful message.

Alone.

That was all Y/N needed to spring up and start fixing her uniform quickly.

I'll be there.

Since she wasn't on duty anymore, she untied her hair, put on some perfume and generally freshened herself up before leaving her quarters. She kept her uniform on so as not to be too suspicious, very aware of the security cameras that were in the briefing room.

Hux was standing by the long, shiny table of the room with three datapads before him. It seemed like he was watching all of them at the same time, focused, but the moment he heard the door open, he looked up immediately. A smirk formed on his barely lit face as he watched her approach him with a smile of her own.

"What is this non-statutory hairstyle, Lieutenant?" he asked, earning just a chuckle for her. He enjoyed it and she knew that.

"Long day?" she asked, keeping her hands to herself, even though she would love to just throw herself onto him as soon as possible.

He sighed, the dark circles under his eyes clear even in the dimly lit room.

"Too long." He closed his eyes for a moment. "Too long of a week."

"And you're still busy tonight?"

He sighed again, pointing to the datapads. "As you can see. I wasn't avoiding you, just so you know. All the things you ordered came to my quarters as well. It is just I barely had time to..."

"You know you don't have to explain that to me," she cut him off, smiling at him sweetly which he did not expect. "I don't blame you. I know how much you work... Can I help you in any way?"

His heart began beating faster. Even though it's been a while since their relationship started, it was still difficult for him to understand 

He lifted just a corner of his mouth, leaning in slowly. "A kiss would be a good start."

"But the cameras?" she leaned back before he could touch her, and he raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, Y/N." He gave her a smouldering look, wrapping his arm around her waist to pull her towards himself. "Are you forgetting who I am? Maybe I need to give you a little reminder."

"What?"

Hux smiled triumphantly, seemingly satisfied with her reaction, then pressed a button underneath the table that locked the door.

"The cameras are long off. I do know how to prepare for you, love."

Shivers went down her spine as he said that. Oh, how she missed that feeling of his hands on her, and when he caressed her lower back with his gloved hands, it quickly gave her that pleasurable sensation she had been missing.

He placed a kiss on her lips, a sweet one, one that made them both crave for more the moment they parted. Who knew one kiss could work such wonders?

"I missed you," he whispered, leaning his forehead against hers. "You and your insufferableness. If it weren't for Ren's tantrums, I would have more time."

Y/N chuckled, putting her hands on his shoulders. "Aw, my poor little thing... You're like a parent with a rebellious teenager, hm?"

"What did you just call me?" he replied huskily, and she could see something switch in his eyes. "Oh, you're really asking for a reminder, Lieutenant."

Something about the way he said it made her knees weaker. She felt him slowly push onto her until her back hit the table, and then he kissed her passionately. His large hand began roaming 

over her chest almost as if he wanted to rip her uniform apart.

"Is my uniform non-statutory, General?" she asked while she watched him look her up and down hungrily. She was happy to know his desire for her never died down, and he could read all of his intentions just from these moves.

He looked into her eyes, allowing all the yearning he had during the week to turn into lust. 

"I will check. Thoroughly," he replied in such a tone that her skin got covered in goosebumps. "And punish you accordingly."

He unbuckled the belt on her waist, put it aside, then unbuttoned her shirt as quickly as possible and proceeded to put the material parts aside as if opening a curtain in a theatre. He revealed a black bra, one that lifted itself a little, uncovering a bit of her underboob, and it drove him crazy.

He lowered his head to place a kiss on the delicate skin between her breasts.

"For an insufferable lieutenant... You're exceptionally beautiful," he whispered, causing warmth to spread through her entire body. He knew just the right words to say.

"Thank you..."

"Thank you, General," he corrected her. "You need a good reminder of who I am."

He sent her one last short look before taking a step back to grab her hips and pull her pants down. Then, he kneeled down on the floor as his hand landed between her legs, pulling a loud sigh out of her. He began rubbing her through the thin material of her panties, kissing her inner thigh in the meantime.

She almost wasn't able to think at that moment; she missed that so much she almost forgot how strong were the emotions he could make her experience with the slightest touch. With every move and kiss, she felt like the yearning, the exhaustion, the stress of her duties disappear.

"Now, we can't be making any mess here... So you'd better hold still."

She swallowed, then let out a gasp as his movements became more rapid along with her breathing. Her body was reacting more and more intensely to his actions, and the fact that they were in the briefing room only added to the thrill. She knew the door was locked and no one would dare interrupt the General, yet had the unexplainable fear that someone may barge in and see her spread out on the table at any moment.

Hux noticed the wetness on his glove, and a smirk found its way to his face.

"Let's see... How long you can last without making a mess?" he whispered, then used one of his fingers to pull the material of her panties aside.

She saw his face for a split second before his mouth met with her hot skin. Her moan echoed against the walls so loudly that for a moment she worried someone might have heard her. However, the table and chairs of the briefing room were the only witnesses of Hux's mouth and tongue made her unable to think about anything else.

She saw him throw one of his gloves to the floor, then grabbed the rim of the table as he slid one finger inside her. He didn't give her much time before adding a second one, his mouth not leaving her clit for a second.

Her breathing got shallow. Her hand found his hair and tugged on it, pulling his face even closer as she buckled her hips to help herself. Seeing how much she enjoyed it, Hux added a third finger, sending her over the edge immediately. At that moment, she was not sure whether she was about to experience an orgasm or a heart attack.

But it was the former that washed over her, so intense she needed a moment to catch her breath again. Hux picked up his glove, then stood up quickly, rubbing his lip as he watched the picture before him with satisfaction.

"Now," he put his hand under her chin and made her look at him, "who made you feel this good?"

"You," she panted in response, but he was not happy with it.

"My rank."

"General."

He raised his eyebrows, as if prompting her to continue.

"General Armitage Hux of the First Order."

"Good girl." He smiled, then glanced at the table. "And look at you, you didn't even stain the tabletop."

"And here I thought," she said between pants, jumping off the table to put her pants back on, "you were tired."

"I'm never too tired for this," he replied quickly, putting his glove back on swiftly.

"I'm guessing you're expecting me to pay you back?" She began buttoning up her shirt again, as he looked back at his datapads like nothing out of the ordinary just happened.

"I will gladly be paid back, but not now. Not today, even. I still have much to do," he explained, indicating the datapads. That was not the answer she expected, and she felt a knot form in her stomach. When he was back in the light of the screens, his dark circles became evident again.

"Did you even eat anything today?" she asked worriedly, although a small smile sneaked onto her face for a second. "Except for me, that is."

"Today? No."

She gave him a stern stare, putting her hands on her hips like a disappointed mother. "Armitage."

He looked up to see her stance and let out a sigh. "Y/N, I don't have time for this."

"You had a good amount of time to eat me out just now, you have time for food, too."

"That's different."

"Stars, you're unbelievable." She put her hand on her forehead. "I'm starting to understand Kylo, you know?"

Hux gave her a glare, but didn't say anything. He knew she was partially right, and her care for him was still something that surprised him greatly. 

Never before had anyone cared for his well-being.

"Listen," she said sternly, "you can be the damn emperor, Armitage, I don't care. I will stuff that food into you if I have to."

He sighed. Arguing with her was pointless, because he knew she would not give up, but he didn't want to let her win, either—even if his stomach had been rumbling for a few hours now.

"Listen, I am going to your quarters and ordering food. You'd better get your ass there in an hour."

He found it hard to hide the smile that her words caused and tried his best to remain cold. "Bold words to your superior."

She crossed her arms, unbothered. "Oh, and what are you going to do? Discharge me?" 

"For disrespecting my rank, breaking into my quarters... Yes, I could do that."

"Breaking?" she laughed loudly. "I know the password, General." She put his hand on his forehead, fixing his ever-so-perfect hair affectionately.

Even Hux couldn't help a chuckle this time. He brought her closer and held her just for a moment, taking deep breaths. Having her this close, with her nuzzling his neck, was better of a cure to his stress and troubles than any food or sleep might have provided. That warmth, her witty comebacks and just the fact she really cared... He had never felt like this, and stars, he didn't want that feeling to disappear.

"Thank you," he whispered eventually, placing an affectionate kiss on her head. "I've told you that a lot, but remember, you really are my cure."

She just kept her head on his shoulder, moving to him as close as possible with a sincere smile on her face. She knew she would never grow tired of hearing this.

He kissed her forehead. "I'll try to join you soon... But do be careful when you enter my quarters. Your packages are in your wardrobe."

"Understood, sir," she said quickly and gave him a little salute.

He shook his head, but the corner of his mouth twitched a little as he tried to hide yet another smile. "Hand salutes are not performed if a soldier is not wearing a headdress."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, I believe eating a soldier out on a table doesn't fit the rules, either, yet here we are, General."

He did smile this time.

"Go before I change my mind," he said quietly, clicking a button to unlock the door.

She decided to give him one last quick—and risky—kiss, then walked towards the door as if treading on clouds.

"Love you," she said with a soft smile, turning to him one last time before the door slid open and she quickly disappeared behind a turn of the corridor.

Hux stared at the spot where she disappeared for a long moment, unable to ignore that warm, pleasant feeling in his heart she had caused with just these two words.

"So do I," he whispered, for the first time admitting it out loud even to himself.

As much as Hux wanted to find himself back in his quarters, his duties were still haunting him. He went there much later than he expected, still not having finished everything he wanted.

Y/N must have been waiting for him for too long. He did feel bad about it, but at the same time hoped she understood some things just couldn't be changed, no matter how much he cared for her.

The door to his bedroom slid open, and his heart broke just a little at the view.

The room was dark, just barely lit by the blueish glow coming from the holotable. Something was playing on it, but the remote was all forgotten next to the bed. The packages he ordered for Y/N had been taken out of the wardrobe, but remained unopened. On his bedside table, there was a tray with food—and Tarine tea.

Finally, Y/N herself was fast asleep in his bed. The sheets next to her were moved aside, as if waiting for him to slide in. She prepared all of this. She waited.

And he didn't come.

Hux let out a sigh. It was new to him, the fear of disappointing someone. Most of his life, he was his own most strict judge. But now he had Y/N—someone he didn't want to disappoint, someone whose opinion really mattered to him, and he was still learning how to tackle all of this.

He grabbed the remote and turned the holotable off, then went straight to the bathroom. He didn't plan on waking her up; he was exhausted, and she deserved sleep, too.

Hux was too tired to even try eating. He took a sip of the already cold tea, then slowly settled himself in the bed so as not to wake her. Once he covered himself with the sheets, he let out a long sigh, as if trying to breathe out all of his stress and exhaustion. He placed a small, innocent kiss on Y/N's head to tell her the 'good night' she didn't get, and before he knew it, fell asleep with one of his arms around her.

Hux was not expecting to be woken up by a kiss on his forehead, but that was exactly what made him open his eyes. For a moment, he wasn't sure whether Y/N's smiling face before him was real or still a dream.

"Good morning, very scary general..." she whispered, running her hand through his hair affectionately and giggling. At that moment, he was harmless, with his sleepy eyes, messy hair and a soft smile he didn't even try to hide this time. Still half asleep, for a moment he forgot the load of work awaiting him that day...

"A good morning indeed," he replied huskily, then brought her closer in a tight embrace and placed a kiss on her head. "Judging by your smile, you're not mad at me."

She backed away from the hug a little to see his face, then watched him in confusion. "Why would I be?"

"Because you prepared everything last night and I came la..."

"Armitage, it's not my first day here," she cut him off and cupped his face to make him look at her. "I know how busy you are. It's all fine, I promise. I'm glad you got any sleep at all, but I was 

worried you may oversleep."

He sighed as he turned his head towards his bedside table. He was grateful she woke him up; even if his body was desperately calling for more rest, it was just the time for him to get up. Then he turned back towards her and his expression softened, still feeling an ounce of guilt because of the last evening.

"Do you want to be off duty today?"

"Only if you are."

He shook his head. "I can't. I have so much to take care of I don't even know where to start."

"Then I don't want to. At least time will pass quickly while I'll be working. But speaking of working, you," "are overworking yourself, Armitage."

"I'm the General, it's my duty and..."

"Oh, come on," she rolled her eyes, "you can sell the military bullshit to Kylo or Snoke, not me. You know what I mean. I worry about you. I wish you took more breaks, or at least remembered to eat... You being exhausted won't make you any more efficient and you know that."

Hux watched her all this time with sincere shock on his face. The fact that she was so understanding and so caring, doing something no one in his life had ever been able to show him, was making him feel like he didn't deserve even an ounce of her kindness.

"I still find it hard to believe you care for me this much," he said quietly, and she just sighed in response before hugging him tightly once more. That embrace expressed more than words could ever tell him. They stayed like this for a moment, bathing in pure bliss, before Hux moved to look at her face again.

"Why didn't you open your packages?"

"I wanted to open them with you."

"I am sorry," he replied with yet another sigh. "See, that's why I didn't invite you this week. I wouldn't have found the time to..."

"Hey, I told you it's fine. Just sleeping with you is enough for me," she cut him off again.

These words made him smirk immediately.

"Sleeping with me, hm?"

She groaned in response.

"Sleeping. As in closing one's eyes and snoring, you rascal." She smacked his arm lightly, making him chuckle.

"And here I thought you liked more than that."

Hux earned himself another smack on the arm for that response. He chuckled again, and soon, Y/N was not even pretending to be mad anymore. 

She snuggled into his chest, knowing the last calm moments of that morning were about to pass by.

"I'll come tonight too, okay?"

He looked at her apologetically. "I don't know when I'll finish."

"It's okay. We'll open the packages together and..."

A loud buzz from Hux's datapad pierced the air, making both of them sigh in frustration.

"There we go," he said with evident irritation, but still reached for his datapad quickly and answered the call. "What is it?"

"General, an informator of ours had just spotted the droid we had been looking for on Takodana."

"Send our squads there immediately and inform Ren. We can't allow a failure this time. And keep on updating me."

"Understood, sir."

He finished the call, and Y/N let out a giggle she had been stifling.

"Inform Ren? It's almost like you're developing a soft spot for him." She poked him in the chest playfully, getting a glare in response.

Finally, Hux got up from the bed and stretched his arms, as if physically preparing himself for the task ahead.

"Well, then. Do any insufferable lieutenants happen to want to assist me during this very important operation?"

Y/N grinned.

[mimisempai]

At their own pace

Summary

The words had been said and Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship had taken a new turn. An unknown turn. Unknown to both of them.

Both uncertain, they seek advice from their new friends, Maggie and Nina.

Notes

Happens just after my fix-it for episode 6. Can be read separately even if there is mention of it.

On Ao3

Rating G -  1702 words

Crowley parked the Bentley in front of Aziraphale's shop. He didn't get out right away. 

Today was different.

He was even a little nervous, if he was honest with himself. 

Aziraphale and him.

Since yesterday.

Everything had changed.

That was huge.

He leaned his forehead against the steering wheel.

“I want to do all the things that I don't know yet that people do when they're together and I want it to be the most natural thing in the world.” 

Aziraphale had told him. But he hadn't realized that Crowley knew little more than he did about what people did when they were together. 

Okay, there was no point in stalling.

He got out of the car and entered the shop, calling, "Angel, I'm here!"

No answer. 

He walked over to where he always left his glasses, and his eyes fell on a small piece of paper lying next to the horse sculpture. He picked it up and recognized Aziraphale's handwriting.

I went to see Maggie. I'll be right back. 

Aziraphale. 

Crowley sighed and was about to settle into the chair when his eyes fell on Nina's coffee shop across the street. Coffee wasn't going to calm the kind of nervousness he was feeling, but at least her coffee was good.

Moments later, he walked through the door of the coffee shop and up to the counter. 

"Oh, hello, Mr. Grumpy."

Crowley raised an eyebrow and looked at Nina, "Excuse me?"

Nina started to pour an espresso and replied, "Muriel gave you that nickname.  I think I'll keep calling you that."

Crowley muttered, "That little..."

Nina chuckled and replied, "How many shots of espresso today?"

"Just one and..." he looked around and, avoiding Nina's gaze, asked airily, "Do you have Eccles cake today?"

Nina replied, "How many will Mr. Fell have?"

"Four." Then, realizing he'd been so easily tricked, he decided not to react.

Nina wrapped the four cakes and placed them next to the espresso on the counter in front of Crowley.

Crowley was about to pay her, but she shook her head, "It's on the house. Even though you're basically a little responsible, you both still fought for all of us, so it's a little thank you."

Crowley nodded and was about to grab the cup and cakes when Nina's hand came to rest on his arm and stopped him.

She said quietly, "I guess you talked to him," she nodded in the direction of Maggie's shop across the street. Crowley turned to see his angel chatting animatedly with the blonde woman.

Without turning, he replied, "You could say that. We're not very good at it, but we got there. Except I have no idea what I'm doing."

Nina replied gently, "As far as I know, you're not pressed for time, are you? Give yourself some time."

He turned to the woman pushing the wrapped cakes toward him, "And that's a good start. Trust me."

Crowley nodded and this time grabbed the cakes and coffee. 

Nina asked him again before letting him go, "And how is he?"

Crowley replied, "I don't really know. Yesterday was intense, we both needed some time to think."

He started for the door and Nina said, "Keep talking and you'll be fine."

Crowley stepped through the door and prepared to cross the street.

**********

"Mr. Fell, what can I do for you? What mysterious song are you going to ask me about?"

Aziraphale approached the counter and said gently, "I think after yesterday's events you can call me Aziraphale. And..."

He paused a little awkwardly before continuing, "I don't need a record, I need some advice."

Maggie leaned against her counter and said softly, "I'm listening."

Aziraphale replied, "Here... uh, you, last time you mentioned that you were well, you know, in love. And today I know what that's like and..."

Maggie exclaimed, "Oh! Mr. Grumpy has finally decided to speak to you?!"

Aziraphale chuckled, "Mr. Grumpy, he's not going to like that," then the angel realized what Maggie had said and exclaimed, "Wait! Why do you say he's finally decided to speak to me?"

Maggie replied softly, "Nina and I wanted to see you both yesterday, but it was just Crowley at the bookshop. We were going to give you a hard time at first for messing with our love life, but it turned into something positive, so we kind of wanted you to have the same chance we had. For you and Crowley to finally talk for real. We told Mr. Grumpy that you needed to talk. That he needed to talk to you. Because it was clear from the outside that..."

Aziraphale muttered, "It was clear, but I didn't see it."

Maggie said gently, "Mr. F- Aziraphale, we rarely see what is right in front of us."

Aziraphale nodded and continued, "Yes. Good. So, actually, I... I don't know what to do after that."

Maggie raised an eyebrow, "After... what?"

Aziraphale blushed slightly and replied, "After... talking?"

Maggie looked confused, then surprised, and finally asked in a low voice, "Is this your first time? He is your first... love?"

Aziraphale, unable to speak, nodded several times.

The blonde woman smiled and said sheepishly, "I'm not necessarily the best person to ask, but..."

She turned her head toward the window before continuing, "I think you should ask him." 

Aziraphale turned to see Crowley with a bundle in his hands and a cup of coffee.

Maggie whispered in the angel's ear again, "Do as we suggested. Talk to him. And take your time. There's no rush. Look, I love Nina and I'm willing to wait until she's ready, and I think Crowley's that kind of person, too."

Crowley leaned against the door and greeted Maggie, "Any news on Freddy's side?" Maggie shook her head, and Crowley continued, "Velvet?"

Maggie replied, "I asked my contact, but he hasn't called me back yet."

Then he turned his head to Aziraphale and said, pointing to the bundle, "May I tempt you to a little snack at the shop, angel?"

He was rewarded with a broad smile from the angel, who waved to Maggie before moving toward him.

Then Aziraphale asked him, "What did you buy with your coffee?"

Crowley replied, "Some Eccles cakes."

"Oh, that's so nice!"

Crowley grumbled, "I'm not..."

Aziraphale cut him off with a nudge on the shoulder, "We both know you are. So let it go."

Crowley grumbled as Aziraphale opened the shop door for him before closing it behind them.

Crowley had already walked over to the sofa and placed the cakes and his coffee on the desk next to it before throwing over his shoulder, "Tea, angel?"

Aziraphale joined him and replied, "With pleasure, my dear."

Crowley went into the back room and started making tea, and Aziraphale watched him for a few moments in silence before sitting down on the sofa. He felt a little strange and didn't know how to act. So when he heard Crowley rummaging around in the back room, he decided to join him. The demon had his back to him, waiting for the water to finish boiling, when he entered.

Aziraphale raised his hand and held it out, pulling it back just as Crowley turned, probably aware of his presence. 

"Angel?"

He looked at the angel's hand, which seemed to hang in the air.

Perceptively, he said softly, "Not so easy, is it?"

Aziraphale, hand still in the air, asked, "What do you mean?"

Crowley raised his hand and replied softly, "You said yesterday that you wanted to do all the things you don't know that people do when they're together and that you wanted it to be the most natural thing in the world."

Aziraphale gave a sheepish little smile and nodded, "Not that easy, no."

Crowley had brought his hand up to his, and they were only a few millimeters apart.

Aziraphale closed the distance and pressed his palm against the demon's, who slid his fingers between his own as Aziraphale's instinctively closed on Crowley's. 

"Easy..." Crowley said softly, a small smile on his lips, and that was enough for Aziraphale to make the feeling of inadequacy disappear. He felt the angel's tension melt away. Crowley pulled him closer before wrapping his arms around him. Aziraphale immediately closed his arms around Crowley, regaining the feeling of comfort from the previous evening, and sighed slowly.

The demon whispered into the angel's hair, "Angel, I don't know much more than you do, you know. I'm going in blind, too. But someone told me that we had time and that we needed to talk."

He felt Aziraphale chuckle against his chest.

"What did I say that was so funny?"

The angel lifted his head and replied with an amused twinkle in his eye, "I think this someone is related to the person who gave me the same advice." He laughed this time, "To think it was us who had to work to bring them together."

Crowley chuckled as well, pleased to see the Angel loosening in his arms.

Suddenly, the kettle whistled, indicating that the water was warm enough. 

Crowley started to move away from the angel, but to his surprise, Aziraphale whispered, "Crowley, wait."

Crowley stopped and waited.

Aziraphale raised his hands and placed them on the demon's cheeks before pulling Crowley's face to his own. 

Crowley murmured, "Angel, are you s--"

Aziraphale nodded slowly before closing the distance and gently pressing his lips to Crowley's.

It was a gentle touch. Just lips and breaths connecting. A soft kiss that lasted a few seconds before they parted. Crowley immediately took the Angel's hands in his own, afraid to lose the connection.

Then he said softly, "Yeah, just like that, Angel. At your own pace."

Holding one of Aziraphale's hands in his, he used the other to turn off the hot plate under the kettle before preparing Aziraphale's tea. He grabbed the cup and, still holding the angel's hand, pulled it behind him toward the sofa.

He didn't see that Aziraphale brought his other hand to his lips, touching them delicately with his fingertips...

This time, the angel's expression was not sad, there were no tears in his eyes as his lips curved into a gentle smile.

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  🥰

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Ineffable Growing Love series : here (After season 2)

Ineffable Husbands masterlist : here (Before season 2)

[for-parker]

Familiar feelings and faces

summary Peter attempts to really talk to you many times after the spell wiped your memory of him. He didn't think he was being suspicious, until Ned went up to him and told him to just ask you out instead of staring all the time.

word count 2047 or so

tags MJ!reader, Peter being cute and shy, f!reader, kinda open/happy ending

a/n since @idrinkteedarling said MJ instead of x reader, I clarified and: we're doing x reader! Since it wasn't the original request though, I wanna write 2 versions! I haven't done it yet but I hope I will soon. Thanks for the request 💓

original request:

Smiling at the familiar sight of you talking to Ned while still manning the register, Peter shook the snow off his shoes and managed a decent but shy smile in your direction.

It's been nearly two months and he's been coming here everyday for a coffee and one of the stale donuts, just to see his two ex best friends.

"Good afternoon, Peter Parker," you greeted with a grin. After the first time he came here and embarrassed himself by saying his full name to order a coffee, it became some kind of a joke between you (and Ned, but he usually just watched Peter being a nervous wreck in front of you).

"Hi," he smiled back. "The usual?" He nodded and put a five dollar bill down (he made sure to tip you whenever he was here, he knew what a measly pay you received) before moving to sit two seats away from Ned, who was leaning over some math assignment.

Peter looked it over - it was one of the only subjects Ned struggled with - always has. "Uh, you need help with that?" Peter asked timidly, scared of stepping over the line. Ned looked up in surprise but also relief, "Gosh, yes, dude. You're a lifesaver!" He thanked and moved to sit next to Peter.

While he looked over it once, you leaned on the counter as well, setting the steaming cup and donut down. "Thanks," Peter mumbles with red cheeks. You nod and wink, walking back to the cash register when a new customer comes inside.

Peter starts explaining the subject to Ned in the way he knew the boy would understand. Fifteen minutes later and Ned is happily finishing the task, slapping the folder closed with a huff.

"You gotta be, like, a genius to understand this, I swear."

You watch their interaction and can't help but feel as if it was something familiar - they seemed like they'd known each other their whole lives. Peter blushes at the praise and shakes his head with a nervous chuckle, denying it.

Your best friend turns around at your staring and smirks before turning back to Peter. Oh, well. He knew all about your not so tiny crush on the brown haired regular - you just hoped he wasn't going to do anything stupid like tell him before you got to do it yourself.

"When are you asking her out? I know you're not coming for this," with a disgusted look on his face Ned slightly touches the donut which basically crumbles fully, "because that'd be gross." He makes sure to speak at a volume you can't hear, which Peter is glad for.

Peter stumbles over his words - was he that obvious? What if you had moved on? You had promised to find him again but it seemed without knowing you'd ever planned on doing that, you weren't going to.

"I just- she reminds me of someone," he settles on saying. Ned nods, "Alright. Don't see her as a replacement, though. That would be so not cool, dude," Peter quickly assures him that's not what he meant, being glad that you had someone that looked out for you like Ned seemingly did.

"Ask her out now. No one's here and she's been looking at you for ages. It's getting almost as annoying as her crush on Spider-Man," Ned rolls his eyes and takes the donut still on Peter's plate, eating it with furrowed brows. Peter couldn't grasp why someone would do that to themselves - even with his neverending hunger he never dared eating this donut expect once (you had watched him after serving him the order for the first time and he felt like he'd disappoint you if he didn't eat it. After almost throwing back up and turning embarrassingly greenish you made him some kind of calming tea free of charge).

But Peter's world stops spinning for a second - you had a crush on his alter ego? If you ever got to that point, it'd make it so much easier to reveal his secret to you! And it meant you hadn't changed when it came to your taste in partners. He had to admit it was a relief you were attracted to him even if you didn't know it was him under the mask.

"She has a crush on Spider-Man?"

"She has a name that both of you know and she has crushes on people that do the right thing without wanting something in return. Ned, put that donut down. I have no idea how long that's been laying out here."

With a gulp Ned puts it down and you throw it away, while Peter gulps for a different reason. He could smell your perfume - it was the one he'd gotten you for your birthday a few months ago. "Uh, you smell nice."

Smiling, you thank him, "I got it from someone, I don't remember who, but he must've known me well to get me this. It's the perfect smell, really." Peter smiles and looks down at his hands. Before being able to answer something else, Ned gasps.

"Wait, you were gonna let me eat a stale donut! I could've literally died!"

-

After that, conversation flowed easier. Him and Ned became closer again and you started giving him fresh pastries you had baked yourself, just for him (he'd almost cried in happiness when you gave him the first one with the Spider-Man emblem on it, saying Peter reminded you of him - always happy to help without wanting anything in return).

It has now been close to six months, when Peter gets over himself and asks you out.

He had waited for your shift to end, pushing a cup of Starbucks coffee to you with a small smile. "You're a lifesaver. The coffee here is horrible, I don't know why people come back here." He laughs and shrugs - he certainly knew why he kept coming back.

"So? You waited all this time, there's gotta be something you wanna tell me?" Your eyes are locked on his, your head cocked to the side. His cheeks redden and he fidgets with his hands. "You see, uh…"

How did he do this the first time?? Just get over with it? But he should explain a little and ask you out on a date after. What if he messed this up and lost both of his new (old?) friends?

"I like you." He blurted out and paled when you chuckle. "I know, you're not very good at keeping secrets."

His heart halts - that's exactly what you had said after finding out about his secret identity a year ago.

"Oh," he laughs sheepishly, "Would you… want to go on a date with me?" He makes eye contact and this time it's your heart stuttering. "I'd love to. Don't make it boring," he grins widely as you take out paper to write your address and phone number down. He takes it with a smile, as if he didn't know these things by heart.

"I don't know what it is with you, but you feel so familiar. Like I've known you my whole life." You look at him earnestly, something raw in your expression that you usually hide behind sarcasm and dry jokes.

He doesn't really know what to answer but he was just incredibly happy that you felt the same way and didn't feel like he was a total stranger that had a huge crush on you.

"Thank you, you too."

You smile at him and roll your eyes when your boss calls for you to clean. "We'll see each other," he smiles and nods before getting up as well, watching you walk to the kitchen again - the cup of your favorite drink clutched in your hand.

[harrisonbrainrot]

S/o that also has similar car mechanic aspirations as Modern!Han?

Possibly could be a hobby or interest of theirs but then don't specifically work in that field, yet when they're free they help out Han in his little personal car/motorcycle projects.

Like s/o teasing and being sarcastic towards han saying hes doing something wrong or using wrong item and him getting annoyed or something. Or just even being helpful by passing tools and parts, or holding things.

Thoughts?

I do have thots on this because I come from a line of mechanics, so here it goes:

At first it starts out as just wanting to spend time with Han while your relationship is new and fresh. Which meant a lot of time spent in his garage, music blasting, him smoking, and Chewie lounging on the cool floor. It slowly turned into a game of twenty questions every time you were in there. 'What does that do?', 'how do you know that's broken?', 'my car makes a clunking noise but it drives just fine.' Han is always amused by your questions, answering them like you were five given the fact that your knowledge was minimal at best. Then that turned into little lessons. How to change and rotate tires. How to change oil. How to check and change your fluids. Flush your lines. Change your brakes. Soon enough, your car is in the garage and he's teaching you how to fix your own.

'Hold the light right there. No, over a little more, over. Okay, stop. Jesus christ, girl..' is a common occurrence. It takes some adjustment, he's completely used to doing this on his own. He knows how to do this all on his own, he doesn't need help. However, he's not going to deny a pretty little thing her wish to get her hands dirty. Learning to hold the light right and pay attention to what he was doing was lesson one, without even knowing it.

'These are your spark plugs, they use electricity to spark the fuel. They basically.. make your car go. If there's somethin' wrong there, car no go. Got it?'

'Car no go, got it.'

'Atta girl.'

It didn't take long before you were handing him tools when he requested them, holding the nuts and bolts, reaching smaller hands into tight to fit spaces on the engine. He couldn't deny that he was thrilled that you were actually into this. He was proud he had taught you what you knew. It didn't take long before he could step back and watch you repair or replace something. He felt his chest tighten with admiration. Your grease stained hands and arms, the smudges on your face, wearing one of his old, tattered shirts. It made him glow with pride. He'd wrap himself around you, grinning into your neck. 'My lil mechanic, look at you. You're doin' so good, sweetheart.' Which would make you almost combust. You were so eager to learn and please him. He loved that about you, your ability to wiggle and worm your way into his heart and life and make him happy.

It didn't take long for you to be able to blindly hand him a tool while you had your nose stuck in one of his old car magazines. He'd stop and stare, watching your eyes as you read. It made him grin like a madman. He'd nudge your foot with his boot until you glanced up. 'Whatcha readin'? Any good?' And you'd flush slightly, paying attention to the pages again with a small nod.

'You know what I'm reading, you know it's good.'

'Yeah, sure.. but I wanna hear ya say it.'

That always earns an eye roll. 'It's so good, baby. Real riveting stuff.' He'd moan softly, tossing his head back as if he was fucking you.

'Don't care the context, hearin' that always gets me goin'...' you'd scoff and kick his leg. He was always trying to find a way to sprinkle his dirty thoughts in as many casual settings as he could. He loved it. He loved you. He knew it. He told you as often as he could. 'Love ya, girl.'

'Love you, too.. stinky.'

'Hey! Stinky? Who, me?' He'd point at himself, a frown and pinched brow directed at you.

'You smell like a guy who has been stuck in an engine in a hot garage all day... wait, that's what you've been doing.'

'Shut up..'

[phantomoftheorpheum]

i am someone who feels neutral about claire! i don’t like/love her and i don’t dislike/hate her. you’ve hit the nail on the head with something that made me realize why i’m so neutral on her. she’s almost doesn’t feel real?

carmy (& the show as a whole) have this very romanticized view of claire. we are told that they are perfect for each other if carmy could just get his shit together. to me, where the carmy x claire stuff fails is that we simply haven’t experienced them having a lot of chemistry and compatibility in real time. in season 2 we’re just told how sweet they’d be because carmy had a crush on her growing up and she was a family friend. meanwhile, their relationship was portrayed as a negative distraction for carmy’s development of the restaurant. on that note, i do understand people comparing sydney & claire. in season 2, it was an - albeit one-sided battle between claire and the bear/sydney for carmy’s time and attention. sydney and carmy needing to go over menu options but he got too distracted by claire for example.

in season 3, we suddenly get all of these flashbacks of carmy and claire that we never saw originally and it feels a bit like retconning. as if they realized they hadn’t done enough to make us care about their relationship as we should. that’s how it might be perceived anyway. as i’ve seen people say, s2 claire was synonymous with childhood nostalgia but also panic, distraction, and frustration. but s3 claire is supposedly synonymous with peace. it feels like mixed messaging.

i love molly gordon as an actress but claire as a character is kind of just… there. she definitely feels like a place holder. probably to be young carmy’s ideal romantic partner. whether that makes sense thematically for adult carmy? idk. that’s where the confusion comes for me. i’m not sure where the writers are going or what they are ultimately trying to say. i want to have faith but i hope they stick a landing that’s not so dissonant as the carmy x claire relationship has felt so far - whether it ends or not.

Hi, fellow "neutral on Claire" viewer! Sorry this took me a minute to get back to, my internet router went out and it was a whole mess.

I've been thinking a lot about this since I got your ask, and the more I consider it, the more I think I do kinda understand Claire's purpose, even though I remain neutral on her character.

Anyway- yes, I don't think Claire feels real either! Not yet, anyway. And I am totally fine with that in season 2. Not only are we seeing Carmy reconnect with this crush he's had for years, but also it's the got the whole "new relationship" glow about it.

I think the purpose of Claire in season 2 is to show (and honestly in 3, though it's not as in your face specifically with her, but rather with how he has done nothing about what happened between them in the season 2 finale, despite having plenty of time and opportunity) how unbalanced Carmy is, how he doesn't know how to do anything well if he doesn't make that his entire being. In season 2, his relationship with Claire begins to thrive when he mentally and emotionally commits to it, but his relationship with the restaurant (and consequentially everyone there) falls to the wayside, and his behavior skews way too far in one direction.

Then, when he gets overwhelmed, predictably, with things not going well for him at the restaurant because he's been neglecting his responsibilities, he swings ridiculously hard the other direction (avoiding his relationship issues and not even being able to apologize, and becoming incredibly obsessive, over controlling, and dismissive in his work), and I think that is Claire's role in season 3, basically just existing in an unresolved romantic state, to show how, in every way, Carmy's new focus on the restaurant isn't healthy at all. He is too "all or nothing," too single minded.

While we know a few things about Claire, and we've seen a couple of scenes of her not directly through Carmy's POV, she has been a purpose, not a person, so far. And honestly, after thinking about it for a while, I'm okay with that. For now, anyway. Carmy's relationship with Claire is unresolved because Carmy's ability to find balance is completely unresolved. And since season 3 is only half of an arc, I think we need Claire, even if the ultimate resolution of the arc is that Carmy apologizes and they agree to go their separate ways. Claire is important because she is a physical & visual representation of Carmy's ability (or lack thereof) to balance his life, and how things resolve (or don't) with her in the future is a way to measure Carmy's progress (or regression). However, the choice to write season 3 as a "part one" type of deal makes Claire's purpose and role in this season a bit hazy upon first glance. It seems we're only being reminded of her in service of Carmy's arc, and not as a character in her own right. This is another reason I'm not the biggest fan of the structure of season 3 & 4, because season 3 is stuck with 95% of the setup, and barely any payoff, but I do wonder if this will feel better in hindsight when season 3 & 4 can be watched back to back.

If Carmy and Claire get back together in season 4 (or at the end of season 4 and assuming there is a season 5), then, imo, she has to finally become a person, not just a plot device and a symbol. We've seen what the romanticized version of Claire from Carmy's POV is, she's played her role as a casualty of Carmy's dysfunction, but if they resolve that arc with her back in Carmy's life and as a regular presence on the show, then we need to finally see who she is through a realistic lens. Until they either do that, or write her out due to her role being completed, I just don't feel like I have a way to judge Claire for Claire. I can only judge her as a plot device, and for that I think she's been serviceable, if unremarkable.

However, I do see what you're saying about how Claire is set up inherently against Sydney and the restaurant, because Carmy has been unable to split his focus in a healthy way, which means she was (unintentionally) in a tug of war with everything restaurant related. But I also think shipping culture has played a part in a lot of people disliking Claire. She's in the way of a ship that's super popular in the fandom (regardless of the show's intent), and that always comes with consequences. And I can even see how I'd be annoyed about this is if I cared more about romance in The Bear, because I've certainly been there with other shows, and it's hard to like a shallow (not in behavior, but in writing) plot device of a character that is not only in the way of your ship, but actively disrupting even the friendship of those characters. So like, I get it. I just don't have those feelings. And I also think it has caused some people to just flat out be unable to consider Claire's role in the story and Carmy's arc, and judge that for what it is, separate from shipping.

Anyway, I'm pretty open to different ways the show may choose to handle Claire, but I think they do have to choose. There's only so long she can be in the show before it has to make it clear if she exists only to play a role in Carmy's character development, or if she's an actual person with layers and flaws and depth of her own.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! It really did prompt me to consider Claire's character a bit more, so I appreciate it!

[archivalofsins]

I feel like there are some who need a reminder that Milgram isn't responsible for how they respond to it.

For example, if someone is direct messaging, spam reporting, block evading, creating entire superstitions, parroting nationalistic talking points, parroting racist talking points, and over all treating fictitious characters like they matter more than real people then they should have been reflecting on themselves long before Milgram started and I hope they do some day. Honestly, I really don't want people to forget how many within this community have chosen to behave over a show. Maybe it's petty, and it's definitely due to how I've personally been directly impacted by this behavior.

Yet, I think people believe they get an "I can treat others however I want" card because that's, "How milgram is it was made to be divisive if people can't handle that don't talk about it or block lol", "I don't have to respect anyone it's not that serious", "Others just need to think about my feelings and how the way they talk about these topics make me feel. It's others' fault for making the little amount of "real fans" of the series look even worse by talking about bad things the characters may have done."

I don't know how to explain to people that's not how anything works anymore, and I actively hope the people who have behaved this way and negatively impacted others feel ashamed of their actions. Honestly, the shit I know that some of the people here have for sure done is absolutely disgusting. Either way, it's good to have a myriad of examples about how not to act in fandom. Even though the easiest way to avoid being a total piece of shit is to remember that this space is shared with other people who have feelings too and being considerate of that fact.

Because no media is responsible for how a person chooses to act in real life even if they are reacting to it. Believing that is as good as saying it's the books fault it was banned.

I react the way I do to Milgram because I like it and want to talk about it. I talk about the things I do because I care about Milgram, and I care about the things I've talked about it through it. The series isn't holding a gun to my head, forcing me to. To me, this is not a fight against anyone else's opinions. I'm not talking about things in order to defend myself when I'm discussing Milgram.

It is completely different when I talk about the real-life actions of others within this fandom that have negatively impacted me. Those people aren't Milgram, regardless of how much they act like they're in the series themselves.

Let's be serious for a moment. Individuals who act in these ways and fandoms that behave this way are not the media itself. This is why a lot of people have learned to separate a piece of media from its fandom. This isn't the medias fault. It's just a portion of the audience who are a bit too immature to handle the material in a way that is not harmful to others or themselves. It's up to the individual to reexamine how they engage with media and whether it's healthy or not.

"Well, if you really think about it, this is how this is all Milgram's fault."

No one can do that for them, but we can all recognize that treating others poorly is a rancid way to respond to fiction, and there's a sort of entitlement to believing it's not. Right out the gate, Jackalope said he and by proxy Milgram aren't responsible for anything that happens and people are still going,

Like legitimately I had to mediate a falling out in the kagepro fandom in like 2014 due to a couple breaking up and one of the people in said relationship deciding to harrass the other online. The person doing the harrassment legit told me,

It's no surprise that the people who treat others like this under the guise of anonymity or behind the scenes while going around presenting themselves publicly as safe spaces for pocs, lgbtqia, neurodivergent and other basic stuff- Acting all nice, sending people birthday wishes, and going it's all in good fun while simultaneously sending very purposeful and targeted harassment to people for talking about a piece of fiction have issues taking accountability for themselves. Everything they do and how they do it is to avoid having to take accountability ever. At least, that's what seeing others behave that way has led me to believe.

Not even here but in other fandoms as well. I recognized early on that a lot of people don't even view other individuals online as real. They can easily say things like, "I'm not your friend, family, I don't know you, and you don't know me. So, I don't have to care about your feelings."

"Well, you know how it is. It was just an online relationship it wasn't meant to be anything serious even if I said we were dating. It was just something to kill time, really. Isn't it weird that they took it so seriously lol creepy."

I at nineteen knew this was a fucked up way to treat someone else's feelings. I knew it was even worse to then consistently portray this other person as stalking them online to their hundred of followers even though that wasn't true. I also knew my friend didn't want to be involved with this any longer. That it was just getting them more harrassment and each time they would get comfortable online again like clockwork here came bozo the clown with another tumblr post about how they're so uncomfy with their crazy stalker having internet access at all actually or just continuing to use their blog instead of moving to a new one. Or making/assisting with the creations of animatics. I'm very aware of how people like this who announce themselves as safe spaces that care about everyone and never want to hurt anybody really are behind closed doors. One has to either be naive or a special sort of manipulative to feel the need to announce that they are, in fact, a special sort of decent or good human being that all marginalized groups are safe around.

The only thing seeing people behave like this has taught me is that legitimately, there's always going to be bad actors like that. It's annoying, but to an extent, I'm also very happy that I've managed to create an atmosphere where people like that will escort themselves far away from me. Because being in it is worse than being outside of it by miles.

People like this tend to forget that actions speak louder than words. Some truly believe that just putting that in a bio is help enough, and regardless of how they treat real people at the end of the day, they're still doing their part. All because they said they are. I'm aware of this sort of thinking because my first fandom experiences online was a fucking kagepro rp one. I got to see people argue over how rping ocs was lesser than rping canon characters and dogpile on one user because they mistakenly dated the most toxic person on earth at the time.

The people causing these issues at the time, just like now, were all early college age. The person they were dogpiling on for this shit and the people they were having mediate high schoolers. The only other adult there was me, which is why I was asked to mediate later because me and this person were the same age. So, this is not my first fandom bullshit show.

[final-girl96]

Firefly Chapter Forty-Eight

Jackson, Wyoming 2024

After being shown around Marie took Ellie back to the house we would be staying in. Joel and I went with Tommy to the tipay bison, it was the small town's bar. “So, you two are talking again? Does that also mean you're back together?” Tommy asked from behind the bar. He set three glasses on the bar and poured whiskey in each of them. “In a way,” Joel said, taking a sip of the amber liquid. I looked at him, raising an eyebrow. “In a way? What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I asked. “We wouldn't even be talking to each other if it wasn't for Ellie,” he shrugged.

“To answer your question, Tommy, now that I know the correct answer, it's no. No we are not together!” I threw back the whiskey in my glass and stood up. “Where are you going?” Joel asked me. “To make sure Ellie is alright. I don't see a need for me to be here. I mean you did just basically say we're only on this journey to get Ellie where she needs to go and that I was just something for you to stick your dick into now that Tess is dead.”

“Tess is dead?” Tommy asked. I looked at him and nodded, “Yup! Blew herself up after she got bit by a clicker. It was good seeing you again, Tommy.” I walked towards the door, ignoring Joel calling for me to come back. I walked in the direction Maria had told us the house was. When I got there I walked in and called out for Ellie. “Ellie!” The house was silent as I headed up the stairs and checked all the doors. When I didn't find her I went to the house next door. The door wasn't fully closed so I knew Ellie was here. I walked in, closing the door behind me.

I was about to walk into the living room but stopped when I saw the board on top of the fireplace. Sarah's name with the day she was born and the day she died beside a boy's name with that same thing; the birthday and day he passed. I was drawn out of my thoughts of that night, in the beginning, when Sarah was shot. I've always felt that it should have been me who died, not her.

I turned towards the voices to see Ellie sitting in a chair while Maria cut her hair. “Look, I'm not gonna ask you what you're doing with them,” Maria said. “Good,” Ellie told her. “But there are clearly things you don't know about Joel and yn.” So Tommy told her everything I'm guessing. That would explain the look she gave me earlier. “Oh, like how they used to kill people? I know about that,” Ellie said. “So then you understand my concern?” Maria asked. “They don't do that anymore.”

“They stopped killing people?” Maria asked her. “Innocent ones. And Tommy did it, too. Are you worried about him?” Ellie asked, getting upset about the whole conversation. I could have made my presence known but I didn't. Not just yet. “Tommy was following Joel and I believe yn was too. She's so much younger than him. She would have done anything for him. The way you are now,” Maria said. This woman is fucking delusional. Tommy never once hesitated to kill someone. He didn't even argue with Joel when it came to that topic. We did what everyone else did; what we had to do to survive.

“Well, maybe I'm smarter than Tommy. No offense,” Ellie told her. “You are definitely smart. Would've made a hell of a lawyer. There's a whole lot you're not telling me. Good. Therein lies the point. Be careful who you put your faith in. The only people who can betray us... are the ones we trust. You understand?” Maria asked. Ellie hummed and looked past her, making eye contact with me. “Now, come on. Grab your super fսckin' eggplant coat,” Maria told her. “Where are we going?” Ellie asked. “The movies.”

Maria turned around and gasped a little when she saw me. “Sorry, I didn't want to interrupt your conversation,” I said. Ellie walked over to me and wrapped her arms around my waist. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed the top of her head. “Can you wait outside? I wanna talk to Maria for a second. It won't take long.” Ellie looked back at Maria and nodded her head, walling out of the house. I looked up at Maria and took a deep breath, slowly walking closer to her.

“You have no right to judge me or Joel. We've all done things we're not proud of. We did what we had to do to survive and Tommy never argued once. He never hesitated to pull the trigger. See the thing about Tommy, is he's a follower. He always has been and always will be. Joel is a good man. He cares about Tommy. Hell, the only reason he agreed to come along was so he could find him. He was worried when he stopped contacting him.” I walked a little closer and she stepped back a couple steps. “I never want to hear you try to turn my kid against me or Joel ever again.” I stared at her for a few seconds before turning around and walking out of the house.

It was hard to believe that this place was showing a movie. They acted like the world hadn't fallen apart. I stood by a pillar where I could see Ellie and I was away from Maria. I won't lie and say I didn't want to hit her because I did. I also wouldn't mind wrapping my hands around Tommy's neck. It's like he told a totally different story to her than what really happened back then. I made eye contact with him when he walked in and I tilted my head and gave him a look to let him know I wasn't happy with him. He said something to Maria then left. Maria turned her head to look at me and when I finally looked away to look back where Ellie was sitting, she was gone.

I immediately walked out and started to look for her. When I finally saw her she ran right past me, tears running down her face. I looked back at where she came from and quickly ran after her. “Ellie! Ellie, wait!” I followed her all the way back to the house. The front door was left open for me and I saw her running up the stairs. A bedroom door upstairs slammed shut, while I closed the front door. I sighed and headed up the stairs. “Ellie?” I checked each room until I opened the door to a room that once belonged to a teenage girl. “Ellie, hey, what's wrong?” I asked.

She had an old diary in her hand and flipped through the pages. “Is this what girls cared about before Cordyceps? What skirt went with what shirt and boys?” I walked over and sat beside her on the window bench. “Some girls, yes. What's going on? Why are you crying?” I asked. She didn't say anything for a long few minutes. The door opened, and Joel walked in. “Why don't you ask him.”