#and has learned to keep up an optimistic demeanor even when he's having doubts and worries | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

vaultureculture · 4 years ago

Text

Meet my Guardians :) [part 1?]

I have been playing Eldarya ever since I was 14. For the past few years, I had been reading the story religiously, mixing in headcanons to fill plot-holes, and fleshing out Erika until she became something entirely different.

Her character soon split into my three mains, all of whom I will introduce to you all in this post! In my Eldarya AU, they all exist in the same universe, and the three of them play crucial roles in the Oracle’s prophecy. I will develop them more as time goes by hmhm

1-Monnika

Name: Monnika Defreine (she/her)

Birth date: 14th November [ ♏︎ ]

Age: 22

Species: Faelienne (Aengel+Human)

MBTI: INFP

Guard: Absynthe Guard

Familiar: Lillith (Bâkhrâhell)

LI: Leiftan (both in TO and in ANE)

Occupation in the Guard of Eel: She has taken on the role of a teacher for many children inside the H.Q’s walls. She specializes in lyrical poetry and composition. Whenever she is free from her teaching job, she adventures out into the forest to collect ingredients for ointments and potion spells.

Sub-occupation: Trained alchemist, Oracle visualizer. Monnika has frequent premonitory dreams and visions featuring the Oracle, but she cannot understand them nor speak in their tongue. Her visual communication with the Oracle is important regardless, and she’s the most attached to it.

Weapon of choice: Sword

Pros: Forgiving, educated, compassionate, patient, reliable.

Cons: A push-over, easily biased, indecisive, self-victimizing, very edgy.

Monnika follows the more “canon Erika” path. She is the only one of the main three to have come from Earth through the portal we see at the beginning of the game. She is also the only one to retain an element of Aengel blood, albeit stronger than Erika’s. The option was ruled out for canon Erika, but Monnika is indeed adopted and a faelienne. She’s aware of her adoption but does not know anything else about her background, nor has she cared to know.

In her childhood, she was often reported to affect nearby light and energy sources. Her parents believed her to simply be sensitive to electromagnetic fields. This explanation is usually given to spiritual mediums: The energy they accumulate is said to be what causes paranormal phenomena around them.

Once she crossed the portal into Eldarya, she began regulating her Maana, and her powers started manifesting more. The eventual blood transfusion and ‘soul-tethering’ with Leiftan jumpstarted a physical transformation, leaving her stuck out of her human disguise. Now, do not let her edgy appearance fool you: she is an Aengel.

Monnika's form is inspired by traditional Seraphims— that is, ominous balls of eyes and feathers. Her blood is ancient, and her outside reflects it: Upon transforming, all of her grows in size monstrously. She prostrates, back heavy with wings, as blazing white light fills her sockets. Her spindly fingers dig into the soil, like the feeble limbs of a black widow spider. She is one with the earth her mother bore her from; in her presence, one feels as though judgment is neigh.

There are no reasons to fear her, though, for she is kind and reserved. Monnika finds joy in tranquility and avoids company most of the time. After her initial transformation, she grew more distant, ashamed of her new condition. Her human blood keeps her from smoothly regulating her powers, so she is stuck in her angel form from the first time it occurs to the end of the War for Eldarya, before the 7-year coma. With training, she is finally able to change back to a more human disguise.

Leiftan and Monnika are, indeed, soulmates. She always felt herself gravitate towards him and followed this attraction without remorse. Her alliance stands with Leiftan and with Leiftan only, which made her position in TO quite complicated. Her lover's crimes were heinous, but her eagerness to build bridges between them again kept her from understanding the seriousness of it all. After their coma, her spirit and trust are broken by Leiftan's distance. She's then left to pine from afar, desperately trying to comprehend how she's supposed to live with half a heart.

2-Astraea

Name: Astraea Varma (she/her)

Birth date: 5th March [ ♓︎ ]

Age: 24

Species: Euryhalin nomadic mermaid

MBTI: ISFJ

Guard: Obsidian Guard

Familiar: Thetis (Blobbiathan)

LI: Valkyon (TO) & Mathieu (ANE)

Occupation in the Guard of Eel: Unwilling to find herself (or her peers) wounded and helpless in the midst of battle, she started working as a nurse under the protection of Ewelein. Her eagerness to learn and help others soon turned her into a sponge for medical knowledge.

Sub-occupation: Obsidian infantry soldier, Crystal fragment detector. Astraea can easily sense the presence of crystal fragments, corrupted or not. She can easily follow them to where they are, as if they left a visible trail.

Weapon of choice: Hammer or enchanted fists.

Pros: law-abiding, empathetic, just, optimistic, fun to be around.

Cons: Inflexible, holds grudges, bad loser, stubborn, quick to judge.

Astraea washed up on a small stream that crosses the forest of Eel. She was found by Ykhar and Alajéa on the noon of the same day that Monnika appeared in the Crystal Room. Astraea had no recollection of her journey upon waking up beside the fact that she was looking for something significant. She made allusions to it being noted down in her journals, all of which she lost in the last half of her trip.

She comes from a clan of Euryhalin nomadic mermaids, aquatic creatures who can travel both through rivers and oceans according to migratory seasons. These migration patterns are marked by the moon and the stars, so these mermaids are essentially nocturnal. This is similar (if not the same, even) to the structure and tradition of Alajéa and her sister Colaïa’s clan. The likeness between Alajéa and Astraea’s experiences will eventually strengthen the bond between them, and make them grow closer than ever— despite the initial moments of sourness. The only thing that could throw a spanner in the works is Astraea's distaste for Karenn, Alajéa's best friend. The breach between them is no different in ANE, as Karenn's overall demeanor is quick to make Astraea's blood boil.

Despite being an Obsidian, Astraea fears conflict and very much dislikes harming others. She is not one to await battle with a smile, nor is she an outstanding warrior by herself. Nevertheless, it is her wit, perseverance, and fairness that landed her on that guard. Moments of doubt, like passing mists, may have clouded her self-perception; She may have broken down many times but always stood up again to dedicate more effort to her cause. She fights when necessary, using her knowledge in enchantments to gather up fists of rocks as her weapons.

Incredibly passionate about justice and discipline, Astraea held the Obsidian chief Valkyon in high regard. He became one of her confidants in the tortuous search for her memories; then, a partner to stand by as the world caved in. After the War and the 7-year coma, Astraea withdrew into isolation, grieving over the loss of her lover and mentor. The cherry tree that once was Valkyon’s shelter is now Astraea’s place of reflection— a deep, melancholic pondering only Mathieu, a new friend, and Sonzaishinai, an old friend, can get her out of.

3)Sonzaishinai

Name: Hélène “Sonzaishinai” Müller(she/her)

Birth date: 20th May [ ♊︎ ]

Age: 25

Species: Nocturnal fae (moth variant)

MBTI: ENTP

Guard: Shadow Guard

Familiar: Skade (Owlett)

LI: Nevra (TO) & Lance (ANE)

Occupation in the Guard of Eel: Hélène had always shown a questionable interest in the archives of the H.Q. When Ykhar offered her to work as an adjoined archive librarian, she could not pass it up. She knows the catalogue by heart and has gathered a bunch of...information that may be of use to her.

Sub-occupation: Master archer, Oracle interpreter. Sonzaishinai has auditory hallucinations featuring the Oracle. She is able to understand her tongue and speak in the Ancient tongue of Eel, thus being able to interpret many crucial pieces of information.

Weapon of choice: Bow and arrow.

Pros: Diplomatic, humorous, witty, loyal, affectionate.

Cons: Hides information, violent under stress, impulsive, patronizing.

Sonzaishinai was brought to the H.Q disheveled and delirious by a group of local Purreko merchants. They had accused her of theft (bread? a dragon tear? so they said), and she was thrown into a cell pre-emptively. Nevertheless, her worn-down state and the lack of evidence ended the trial period rather quickly. For lack of planning and information about her, she was kept in jail for an extra day. Sonzaishinai was in prison at the same time as Monnika. The 'masked man' freed both, and the girls parted ways at the Hall of Doors.

As a disoriented newcomer, Sonzaishinai was granted shelter. She was allowed three days to recover and decide on her fate. She would either hit the road and return to her homeland or commit to becoming a productive citizen of Eel— by settling and supporting local markets, or joining the staff. Her affairs were thoroughly searched, and nothing was found but a couple notebooks filled with inscriptions in an alphabet unknown. Under questioning, Sonzaishinai soon proved to be, somehow, proficient in languages galore, many of them forgotten and unused.

She soon joined the same recruit program as Monnika and Astraea...not without the Guard's persuasion, of course. There, Sonzaishinai and Astraea grew close beyond belief. They learned to lean on each other, bound by laughter and blind trust. Sonzaishinai considers Astraea a sister and does not hesitate to call her so— while Astraea always goes to Sonzaishinai for guidance. In ANE's weapon giving ceremony, Hélène chooses to call her new bow (it is Monnika who gets the sword) "Astraea", for she believes the younger mermaid to be her protection and good luck charm.

The nickname "Sonzai Shinai" was given to her by a guard colleague from the Jade Coast. It is a verbal expression of Japanese origin, meaning "there is not", "it does not exist". The culprit behind Hélène's telling nickname is no other than her silence: One can barely hear her arrive, and she always seems to appear as suddenly as she fades away. With time, she fully adopted the nickname, and nobody really calls her Hélène anymore—with rare exceptions.

Nocturnal faes are beings as mysterious and charming as they are dangerous. Most of them present themselves as delicate young women, who seem far too attractive or even stuck in time, never aging. Behind their lips, however, hide sharp teeth. They are carnivorous and oftentimes conniving, some even venomous, just like the habitats or plants they frequent. It depends on the individual, of course, but they do not have the best reputation around. Whatever they really are, it is not advisable to seal deals with them. They always have a trick up their sleeve.

Although Hélène can be 100% trusted if you are her ally, she does tend to keep many things a secret. It was her that contacted Lance in TO, never telling Miiko and even asking him to take her along. She built a sense of trust between them that allowed Lance to feel comfortable enough to kidnap her in particular, hoping she'd be the one to understand his goals the most. He'd never thought that she'd know as much as him and that she'd been using him to get new leads the entire time. Despite it all, they were always capable of dialogue, which threatens to come back in an incredibly mentally stimulating way upon their new meeting.

Regarding Nevra, Sonzaishinai had always felt a strong, nurturing love towards him. He'd proven to be an ambitious brat with too big of an ego one too many times, but his light-heartedness and genuine attachment got to her rather quickly. Upon waking up after the 7-year coma, she did not recognize the moody and regretful man before her. He'd promised to love her forever, but now she stood alone spiteful, facing empty words. Despite their falling out, she will always have a soft spot for him and won't doubt to put herself in harm's way for him.

#eldarya #eldarya a new era #gardienne #erika #beemov #eldarya oc #oc #eldarya guardian #original character #eldarya ane #eldarya to #eldarya spoilers #eldarya karenn #eldarya alajea #eldarya leiftan #eldarya nevra #eldarya valkyon #eldarya lance

29 notes · View notes

charlieweasleyxmc · 4 years ago

Text

Gryffindor’s

Best

Captain

Charlie’s boots made footprints in the mud as he made his way down to the quidditch pitch. Truthfully, he would have rather have been flying, but Professor McGonagall had strict rules about flying to practice from a Gryffindor tower open window, he had found that out the hard way in his third year.

Still the walk wasn’t too bad, despite the leftover wetness from the rain earlier that day, for he was able to quietly observe the Gryffindor team as he entered the pitch.

It was unheard of, three members of the same family taking up three of the seven spots on a quidditch team, but no one could doubt either Charlie’s seeker skills or Fred and George’s ingenuity when it came to their beater abilities. Even as the captain, no one had argued with Charlie about keeping his twin brothers on the team for the last couple years. Out of his peripheral vision, Charlie caught sight of Ben and Jae, the two Gryffindor boys out of the corner of his eye.

Jae was no doubt observing the team so that he could hedge his bets before the next quidditch game. Fred and George had been talking to the older Gryffindor boy often lately, making Charlie a little suspicious and more than a little worried if their mum ever found out what the three trouble makers were hatching.

A traitorous voice in Charlie’s head whispered that it wasn’t his problem anymore.

But he didn’t listen to it.

“Team!” he yelled above the wind, quite strong that day. “We need to have a chat in the changing tent before we warm up. I’ve got to tell you all something.”

They came quietly, only slightly confused, but not overtly concerned as Charlie led them, as a captain should, to the changing room tent, pulling aside the flap so they could all enter and get settled.

Six pairs of invested eyes gazed at him, their captain.

He locked eyes onto Fred and George, the only two who already knew what this would be about.

And so he told them, letting the story of the Romania opportunity flood out of his system and into the air as four faces gazed on in shock, two in understanding.

The biggest pair, the eyes that got brighter and more worried all the time were the hazel eyes of Oliver Wood.

“But Charlie,” he said, “we still have one more quidditch match against Ravenclaw and we’ll be sure to win the cup this year. We need you.”

Charlie smiled.

“Don’t worry, Oliver. I’ll be here for the match next weekend. I’ll be leaving the day after. So, I’ll be sure to catch that snitch one last time for us before I’m out of here.”

Angelina, her mouth having opened to protest, seemed calmed by the knowledge that he would be there for the last match. Katie still seemed surprised, but Alicia of all of them, was settled in her demeanor.

She looked as though she understood.

“You’d have had to get a new seeker next year anyway,” Charlie smiled a comforting smile, though he knew it came off as a little sad as he looked at each of them. “I’m in my seventh year. I wouldn’t have been here next year anyway.”

“Nothing and no one could follow you up,” said Oliver, his eyes betraying the sorrow.

“Maybe someone can,” Charlie smiled his kind smile. “Maybe they’ll be even better than me. Maybe their seeking skills will be legendary and they’ll be the best flyer Hogwarts as ever seen.”

“You’re an optimist, Weasley,” Angelina said, a slight smirk to her lips.

Charlie smiled. “Maybe. But there is still the matter of the new Captain.” His eyes locked onto Oliver Wood.

Charlie was the first to leave the tent, allowing them all to chat and talk game theory and Oliver to already begin strategizing how they would pick out a new seeker, how they would work with the team. So, Charlie went out to the field to be the first one in the air. He wanted to let the team start learning to get along without him. They would have had to next year either way.

But a familiar face, her pointed green hat in a velvet forest green, stopped him from where she stood just a few feet outside the tent.

“You made Wood the new captain, didn’t you?”

“He’s the most passionate quidditch player I’ve ever met. He’ll make a good captain.”

McGonagall smiled. “He’ll make a great captain, though I can’t say I’m not afraid to have him be in charge of the Gryffindor quidditch team for the next three years he’s here. I expect he’ll be able to win us the cup.”

“I expect he will,” Charlie smiled slightly.

And Professor McGonagall returned his smile, humor in his eyes.

“I’ll look forward to hearing your name, Mr. Weasley.”

“I’ll look forward to making my name one that you might hear, Proffessor.”

Professor McGonagall nodded her head, picking up her robes to keep them from dragging in the mud as she moved to go back towards the castle. Then she stopped, turning back to look at him as though she had something left to say that she had almost chosen to not say, but had changed her mind anyway.

“You were one of the best, Charlie Weasley. I hope there are some who have a chance to hear your story.”

Charlie smiled softly.

“I just hope that whatever they hear, it will lift them up.”

“It already has to at least one of us, I know,” Professor McGonagall gave him a knowing look before turning back, walking back towards the castle, her pointed hat bobbing in the wind.

#charlie weasley #charlie weasley fanfiction #charlie weasley x jacob's sibling #charlie weasley x mc #charlie weasley x reader #charlie weasley x you #harry potter fanfic rec #harry potter fanfiction #hogwarts mystery #hogwarts mystery charlie #charlie weasley fanart

94 notes · View notes

sevfanfic · 4 years ago

Text

A Touch in the Dark - Chapter 13: A Different Perspective

Word count: 1,964

(This first part is Irma’s POV)

A gurgling croak sounded overhead from a raven that soared high in the sky. The bird circled above a cluster of buildings before nose diving into a dark alley. The passage was narrow and cluttered with garbage. A cluster of dark feathers formed a swirling cloud as the shape of a woman emerged. Irma straightened her neatly tucked shirt and stepped out of the alleyway and into a bustling crowd of people. She approached the cold white edifice across the street. Her thin frame weaved between the pedestrians with ease, her face a mask of indifference. Her path led her through a heavy revolving door. The sound of her footsteps echoed sharply against the white walls of the entrance hall. She approached a closet at the end of the hall, inside stood tall shelves lined with assorted office supplies.

“Revelio.” She waved her wand in a small arch in front of her, the shelf began to tremble. A door revealed itself as if a mist was being blown away. Irma entered through the opening and proceeded into a dark corridor lit by dim blue hues emanating from large sconces.

“Mrs. King, you’re early. The Minister isn’t expecting you for another hour.” A short man with a stout frame seemed to emerge from the air.

“I will see him now,” Irma swiftly passed the man and continued speaking as he struggled to keep up with her pace, “where is he?”

“I must insist that you wait, he is in an important meeting and is not to be interrupted.” The man spoke rapidly, attempting, unsuccessfully, to stop the tall woman. Irma continued to make her way through the winding corridors of the Ministry of Magic. She mulled over the Minister's possible whereabouts and concluded he’d most likely be in his favorite conference room. Her determined footsteps could be heard from inside the room she was approaching.

“Ah, Mrs. King,” Kingsley Shacklebolt turned from his spot at the head of a grand table, “I will be done shortly. Please wait in my office.” He turned back to the circle of confused faces.

“It’s. Important.” The severe look in Irmas eyes sent a shiver of realization down the spine of the minister as he glanced at her again. He promptly stood and neared the silver haired woman.

“We shall resume this meeting when I return.”

The Minister’s office was furnished with cushioned chairs with large pillows and tall framed paintings. No windows meant the only light came from small lamps and candles. It was cozy and Irma’s frigid statuesque demeanor cut into the warmth. She reported her findings and spoke adamantly about further interrogating the newest professor of Hogwarts.

“She has the support of Severus Snape. We cannot trust either of them.” Irma spoke firmly.

“She has given us no reason to mistrust her,” Kingsley shook his head, “I agree we must keep an eye on her but there is no need to turn to extremes at this time.” He paused and then stood from his chair, “And as for Severus, he was given immunity and has proven his true loyalties.”

“We are to wait for the inevitable then?” Irma raised a brow, “you know what she’s capable of, Severus is also highly skilled.”

“I understand your concern, but we have no evidence to justify taking any action. We will watch them and the others.”

“Very well.” Irma gave a nod of defeat as she watched the man leave the room. She knew she couldn't go against orders but had a pang of uneasiness in the pit of her stomach. The Minister had put together a task force to track down any potential threats, such as witches or wizards with unexplainable powers. Irma King was named head of the force, a general of sorts. She was pitiless and calculating with a taste for authority.

Irma instructed two of her best practitioners to keep watch at Hogwarts. They were to report back with any new developments or interesting findings. The two, a witch and a wizard, were both animaguses so staying hidden was not an issue.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

“What if I were to substitute boom berry with powdered bone?” You picked up a few glass vials from the shelves against the back of Severus’ classroom. As you walked back to your table you noticed him standing over your bubbling cauldron.

“It’s possible that could work.” Severus turned to you as you approached him. You set the supplies down and began to measure out a gray powder. Severus watched you with a fond look in his eyes.

“You’re so pessimistic, Severus.” You grumbled sarcastically. It was late in the evening and the moonlight trickled in through a small window. The chilled air lingered with the faint smell of the potion you were working on. Severus placed a hand on the small of your back.

“Maybe you’re just too optimistic,” he whispered, “however, I do enjoy watching you experiment.” Severus spoke close to your ear in a husky voice that sent a shiver down your spine. You smirked and nudged him away playfully.

“Don’t patronize me.” The teasing lilt in your brought a smile to Severus’ face. He kissed your cheek softly and made his way back to his desk. He began to work on some grading. Occasionally he would look up at you and watch you concentrate. A small smile remained on his face as he worked.

The evening went on in silence, you focused on your potion and when you began to clean your area Severus got up to help. When you finished he walked with you back to your quarters.

“Would you like to see this new crimson asphodel I’ve been growing?” You asked Severus with a smile. He looked at you suspiciously and you pushed open your door.

“Does such a thing exist?” Severus watched you carefully.

“It might,” you giggled and took his hand, “but I definitely haven’t seen one.” You then pulled him through the doorway. He let you do this but then he took you into his arms and kissed you. When he pulled away from you he brought his hands to your cheeks. His thumb grazed against your bottom lip.

“If you want me to stay, all you have to do is ask.” He murmured. The warmth of voice brushed against your skin.

“It’s that easy, hm?” You pursed your lips.

“Yes.” Severus smiled and kissed you again intensely.

Severus woke before you. He ran his fingers lazily over the bare skin of your back, tracing small scars and worshiping the curves and dimples of your body. It was early in the morning, the sun had barely risen above the horizon. He watched the slow rise and fall of your breaths. He admired the mess your hair had become, having become fond of the unkempt look that you always woke up with. These moments gave him the most peace, he felt his heart swell with love. The softness of your skin reminded him of satin sheets. He moved closer and kissed your shoulder.

“Venus in her shell was never so lovely, and Diana in the forest never so graceful as my Lady when she strides through Paris.” Severus whispered in a low breathy voice, his lips hovered close to your skin. The verse resonated with him and he imagined holding you in his arms like this for an eternity. Your sleep was deep but the warmth against your shoulder pulled you closer to a wakeful state. You shifted towards Severus. His arm found its way around your waist.

“That was beautiful.” You groaned sleepily.

“I thought you were sleeping,” he moved a lock of hair from your face, “I said it because you’re beautiful.” The tenderness in his voice lulled you back to sleep with a small smile on your lips. He kissed your forehead and pulled you against his chest. With your cheek against his skin you listened to his heart beating rhythmically.

The winter swallowed the countryside and the students were preparing to leave for holiday. You cleaned your classroom and helped some of the younger Slytherins get their belongings together. You began spending most of your free time with Severus. One evening after most of the students left, you invited him to have dinner. You asked the elves for permission to use the large Hogwarts kitchen and set up to cook.

“Do you like Italian?” You asked while chopping a small onion.

“I suppose,” he replied, “I didn’t know you could cook.”

“It is one of my many talents, Professor.” You twirled the knife in your hand before dumping the onion in a hot saucepan. He followed your movements with a raised brow. When you finished cooking you handed Severus a plate and he smiled gratefully.

“Thank you.” He watched you fondly as you ate. Over dinner you two spoke about the visit from the Ministry. Severus expressed his distaste for their obvious lack of discretion and self-restraint.

“Maybe she just wanted to be thorough,” you spoke carefully.

“Doubtful,” Severus scoffed, “they’re watching us, that is how thorough they like to be.” He pushed his empty plate aside and took your hand in his. With an earnest look in his eyes, he brought your hand close and kissed your wrist. “Nonetheless, I will protect you. I promise.” He kissed your wrist again then pressed it against his chest just above his heart.

“And you call me a hopeless romantic.” The redness in your cheeks made your face warm and you smiled brightly. Afterwards, Severus helped you clean up the mess you had made. He walked beside you down one of the many shadowy corridors that you learned to memorize. You came upon his door first and he stopped.

“Would you like to join me for tea?”

You agreed and he invited you in. You sat at the small coffee table where you first had dinner together. It was lit by three small candles that rested upon a stack of books. Soon he brought two cups of hot tea and handed you one. He sat across from you, his index finger tapping relentlessly against the cup. You noticed this habit of tapping his finger occurred when he was nervous about something.

“Are you okay?” You asked between sips.

“Yes, I’m fine,” he looked down at his hands then slid them into his lap. He gazed down at the cup and then sighed softly.

“I need to tell you something.” Severus spoke up and you nodded for him to continue. You heard him tapping against his leg, then he went on, “You have shown me that happiness is attainable even with the darkest of pasts,” he looked into your eyes, wanting you to see that he was opening his heart to you, “It would make me even happier if you would grant me the privilege of being your partner, in this life and the next.”

You felt your heart flutter in your chest as you looked into Severus’ dark eyes. At that moment nothing else mattered, only how much you wanted to kiss him and tell him that you'd love nothing more than to be with him. Your movements were brisk as you stood and closed the distance between you two. He was quick to notice your movements and pushed away from the table creating a space for you which you gladly filled by straddling his lap. You then took his cheeks in your hands and pressed your lips against his. He grasped your waist and kissed you back passionately. You pulled away and admired the man who had stolen your heart.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yes.” you smiled and pressed your forehead to his. The smile on Severus’ face beamed and for the first time in his dreary life, he was genuinely happy.

TAGS: @ayamenimthiriel @marvelschriss @debiraquel @mitsuhkai @the-not-so-iconic @darkthought15 @rubym13 @4everflowercore @otherxstories @thottywithoutthebody @setsuna-meiou31

#severus #severus x you #severus snape #snape #snape fanfiction #snape x you #fanfic #snape love #severus x reader #snape x reader #severus fanfic #severus lives

67 notes · View notes

rigelmejo · 4 years ago

Text

Extensive Reading Updates - Zhenhun

I have been extensively reading zhenhun, my print novel version so I am not looking up any words. (Whereas with the hanshe pingxie fanfiction I am still occasionally clicking a word). I have read the first 20 chapters of the webnovel version of zhenhun in Pleco in the past few months, so most unknown words I have looked up before at some point. So right now I'm re-reading a lot of the same content and will be until I get past chapter 20.

I can tell that my comprehension of zhenhun probably is at about 95%. As in, its enough that I can follow the main plot and most key info details, but there's enough unknown words that I cannot guess some of them from context if its a totally new part of the novel I'm reading. And I run into a number of words in the in-depth scenery and character backstory descriptions that I just do not know and there's enough I don't always have enough context to guess relatively closely to their meaning.

Since these first 20 chapters are a re-read more or less, I have the extra context of 'knowing the overall plot that happens here' already. So I'm reading slower than I probably could, trying to figure out any unknown words from all the surrounding word context and the prior-plot-knowledge I have. For these re-reading sections this is working well, a majority of the words I can re-remember or figure out. I am hoping I will pick up enough of THESE kinds of unknown-words during this re-reading portion, so that hopefully my comprehension when I get to the new parts of the book will be a bit higher than 95%. Then hopefully once I get into totally new parts of the book: my reading speed will be a bit better (less unknown words I hope lol), and I will know a bit more words to guess more totally-new unknown words (that I've never looked up before) vague overall meanings.

Examples of what things I can read clearly versus parts I can't figure out all of the words enough to be relatively sure of the details. In chapter 1, I can read the parts about "Guo Changcheng having a phobia of phone calls" clearly, but then the details about him being afraid of people and having social anxiety I can follow certain parts, but other parts of the descriptions (like him when he sees a teacher or principal) I just sort of vaguely guessed meant he was terrified of them. When chapter 1 described Zhao Yunlan's entrance, I could clearly follow the parts about him looking serious/having a bad attitude and walking fast with the attitude of "if you're in my way roll the fuck away" and then the part about how instantly his mood changed to warm, he smiled friendly, he talked kindly and helped Guo Changcheng out by patting at his shoulder when Guo Changcheng got all sweaty trying to shake hands. But then the part about how Guo Changcheng sensed a seriousness/almost-scariness about Zhao Yunlan? All those details read vague to me and I am just summarizing that my interpretation of it was "even acting friendly, Guo Changcheng felt he was serious underneath/powerful/had an intimidating vibe." And since that detail read SO vague to me, I can't tell if that was an early hint Zhao Yunlan might be a god/used to have been Kunlun, if its just another implication Guo Changcheng is afraid of people/authority figures, or if it was trying to imply something else I just did not pick up on. So even WITH the re-reading prior context of these scenes, in-depth descriptions of character's intepretations still are more vague to me even if I can guess some of the words. I imagine this will get worse when I get to the totally new chapters - unless I learn a LOT of helpful words from context by the time I get through the first 20 chapters.

When I re-read the Kunlun intro I realized I may have translated some details wrong when I translated it to english several months ago. Now, this time I didn't use a dictionary to read at all, so it's possible I also did not interpret the details I read correctly THIS time around. But yeah, a couple days ago when I re-read that part I interpreted the 'qing yi' as possibly green/blue cloth Kunlun is wearing as the blizzard is blowing (whereas when I first translated that line months ago I thought it meant 'clear white fabric' blowing in the wind like some ripped piece of cloth - its also possible this time it still means 'bright cloth' but I do think it sounds more like its Kunlun's clothes than a random cloth blowing in the wind). And this time, when I read about Shennong it seemed more like he was either a god who'd lost his powers, or a god who'd lost his godhood fully, and its just he still retained his kind unselfish demeanor. Whereas when I first translated, I figured he was just a god 'who'd suffered' because of the great calamity that had just happened, but not particularly doing any worse than that. In this re-read though it feels to me more like its implying something more severe has happened to him/is happening. Also during this re-read, the line about 'the hole in the ground being so deep the rain did not even reach this far down' was much clearer for me whereas when I initially translated I had to look up a Ton of words in that section and still didn't quite get what it meant.

Also for the chapter 1 re-read, certain details were much easier for me to clearly understand. The part about McDonalds I FINALLY recognized that word in the sentence, the part about Guo Changcheng parking then going into the courtyard area and seeing the lobby office building, the part about human resources department, all of those sections I followed the details much easier than last time I read with a dictionary. So yeah, I'm curious which parts will be 'clearer' to me this time reading.

I am still reading at a slow 5 minutes a page (speed I was reading print novel of zhenhun last time). But to be fair? I am slowing down to try and figure out every unknown right now on the re-reading sections. And I read english fiction at like 3-4 minutes a page (why???? Do I just... picture and savor a lot???). I know when I'm reading nonfiction or back when I'd read class-assigned things I could read way faster, but I think its just because I scanned for important info and details and then moved on. Idk but...I really do read english fiction too slow too lol (I'm reading a friend's book and I've read like 110 pages despite like 10 hours on this book so far T-T just because I keep savoring it and pausing and rereading). I'm rereading a fic I wrote, so I know everything that happens, and I was reading like 1 page every 3-4 minutes ;-;. I know I can read super fast I think when I like something I just... slow down. Now, my chinese is reading slow just because reading slow is ALL I can do lol. But I may need... to be more realistic that any novel may take me 20-30 hours optimistically when I read like an english novel that's only 300 pages over 3 weeks now and I'm only 1/3 through it.

I can read chinese a touch faster if its actually in my 98% comprehended range I think. For hanshe, while when I'm slowing down looking up all unknown words its probably around the same speed as zhenhun? While I'm just reading to follow the story, I can finish a whole chapter in a handful of minutes. Now, like zhenhun, I am currently reading chapters I have already read before - so the familiarity is likely speeding me up. So that fact does mean it probably won't be as easy/fast once I get to the new chapters. At the moment though, unknown words pretty much all I have a good guess of understanding roughly in context (a lot like me reading fanfic in middle to high school as far as the amount of new vocabulary beyond my range that is not affecting my understanding). I just do not necessarily have a good chance of guessing completely new hanzi pronunciations (which is the main reason I keep occassionally looking up words). The hanzi I've vaguely seen before, I can sometimes guess their reading based on radical or the other word I know them from. But the completely new hanzi I do not remember seeing at all (although I did apparently at some point during the first read through) - I cannot make a decent pronunciation guess sometimes. And of course, the hanzi I always cannot guess correctly for the life of me (looking at you 'suspicious' 'hesitate' 'doubt' because I am STILL getting those 3 words/hanzi in them confused even though I've probably looked up each word like 40 times at least).

For me, print text is slightly easier to read (and in extensive reading its somewhat easier for me to guess new word meanings/hanzi). By this I mean the font they usually use for print novels (it looks a bit more like handwriting with more slanted lines and less 'blocky' of a look). I sort of think its because the print text usually used in books has more obvious radicals to me. So my eyes parse out the radicals I'm looking at easier and can make a guess at meaning/pronunciation. An obvious example is any time a 'sound noise' is written with hanzi with the mouth radical on them. When I'm reading in print text, I recognize 'mumbled, shouted, humph'ed, sighed, breathed in etc quite quickly. Along with sounds like 'xililala' and 'deng deng deng' and there was a sound phrase used I think in Guo Changcheng's section about school in chapter one that was like he sort of 'tumbled/fumbled his way through school' and while i know tumbled/fumbled is probably not Exactly the word? It looked like a sound-noise word to me because of the mouth radical, so I figured it might be something like that? Whereas I know when I read the webnovel if I saw a 4 hanzi phrase like that I would've just gotten confused by those hanzi cause I wouldn't have recognized the meaning of the other radicals in the hanzi. Also a few weeks ago I changed a fic I was reading's text to the print-usual text in Pleco, and had a much easier time reading less slow/recognizing hanzi I'd seen before. That said, recently reading a ton of hanshe has helped computer-text reading ability a bit I think. I'm getting much more used to recognizing radicals in computer-text website usual font, which I notice most obviously in that I'm hitting more 'sound hanzi' that are getting less confusing to me to recognize.

So I guess in summary, reading extensively is going fine. I'll find out in a few weeks if its causing any improvements. I do think its helping with my ability to recall words/pronunciations of words I've seen before though. Just because the quicker I can do that the less I pause, and I don't have a dictionary to help me out so I seem to remember some pronunciations quicker (maybe because I 'have' to). I also think its helping me with general sentence parsing a bit - which I thought I was fine at, but on re-reading the beginning of zhenhun I am realizing there's a decent amount of sentences I did NOT interpret quite right the first time around even with a dictionary.

#september #september progress #reading progress #i am happy my reading skill is improving but as usual its definitely a slow progress #i would not be surprised if i read zhenhun AGAIn in a year #and found out yet Again how many details i'd misunderstood prior lol #i think thats. just how it is sometimes maybe

2 notes · View notes

renee-writer · 4 years ago

Text

Learning to Love Chapter 160 Slow Recovery

A week later, Willy has recovered enough to start physical therapy. He pushes through working hard, at first just to be able to sit up. Trying not to get frustrated, he reminds himself that he is blessed to be alive. Daniel, the last Team member there, as all those with children had went home, is a great source of comfort and encouragement. Grace provides the same for Amy.

They are invaluable for watching John Mark, holding Amy when she cries, pushing Willy to sit up a bit longer, stand for a few more minutes, to take five more steps.

"Come on Tex, you can do it. You got this." Willy moans but forces himself to keep moving. "Good job."

"Chief, you have no idea how hard this is." He rests against the rails holding him up. He is covered in sweat like he has just ran ten miles instead of taken ten steps.

"Don't I? I have been here remember?"

"Oh right."

"I know this is hard but you have made an amazing recovery." He knows he is right but comparing where he had been to where he is now makes it hard to stay optimistic.

"Look Chief Christmas is next week. You should go home."

"No way man. We aren't deserting you."

"You should be with family."

"I am. My wife, unborn child, my brother, sister-in-law, and nephew are all here."

"Thanks but I meant the rest of your family."

"We will get together later. Grace and I have discussed it. This is where we want to be. Now how about it a few more steps."

Christmas at Ramstead isn't quite like Christmas in Georgia or Virginia but the staff tries their best to make it special. There are Christmas trees up and weaths and poinsettias. There is even mistletoes over several of the doors.

They spend Christmas Eve all together in Willy's room. They sing carols and, the couple's exchange gifts. Grace and Daniel gift Amy and Willy with a certificate for baby sitting John Mark when Willy gets out of the hospital. "We know you will want some private time." Daniel explains with a grin.

"Thanks guys. This is seriously great." Willy replies as Amy blushes against his side.

Willy and Amy give them "world's greatest Aunt and Uncle sweatshirts" in honor of all they have done to help with John Mark.

The next morning, Grace is quite nervous to see Daniel's reaction to his gift. She has been keeping a big secret. Having gone to see the OB on base while Daniel was working with Willy, she would have insisted he had came with her, had she known.

The midwife she had seen did all the standard pre-natal exam things. When she went to listen to the baby's heartbeat, her demeanor had changed, scaring Grace.

"Is something wrong?"

"No, sorry dear. Didn't mean to scare you. Has anyone told you that you may be having twins?"

"Twins? No."

"I believe I hear two distinct heartbeats. I can check with an ultrasound."

"Oh wow! Yes, please do."

She had and, without a doubt, the ultrasound shows two healthy babies.

"Do you want to know their genders?" She had came back a bit, from her shock, at this question.

"I, ah, have to discuss that with my husband."

"Okay, here is what we will do. I will write them down and seal it in an envelope. When you two decide, you can open it or not." She hands her the envelope as well as several ultrasound pictures.

Grace recovers enough to thank her. She goes and has the ultrasound pictures framed and this is what she presents to Daniel Christmas morning.

He opens the box and she watches his face as he stares at the ultrasound pictures. "Two?" His face and voice reflect the same shock Grace had been feeling.

"Yes, it was so hard to keep the secret." She explains how she had found out.

"Wow! Do you know what they are?"

"No. But the midwife gave me their genders in a sealed envelope. I wanted to discuss it with you and have you be here when we found out."

"I think we must know. If it is two boys or two girls, we need two more names."

"Agree. So do we want to open this?" She holds up the envelope. She then hands it to him. He nods and opens it. She waits with held breath. He smiles as he hands it to her. "A boy and a girl!" She squeals. "Judah and Judith! What perfect twin names." She is laughing and crying. Daniel pulls her into his lap and laughs and cries with her. "We need to send their ultrasound picture and names to our families."

"Perfect idea. Oh, I do have something for you." He reaches beside them and hands her a small jewelry box. She opens it to reveal a ring. It has a emerald and a ruby. "It is a mother's ring. Those are Judah and Judith and Patrick's birthstones."

"Oh Daniel! I love it." She is crying again. It is the best Christmas either of them can remember.

A month later, Willy is strong enough to go home. He is still in daily physical therapy but can do it in Virginia.

"We are going home, John Mark." Amy tells him the morning of their departure. The baby claps his hands in response to his momma's excitement. She knows that Willy still has a long way to go but to be home, to have him back in their own home, surrounded by his Team, will help.

She is also happy that Grace and Daniel get to go home, with the twins she is carrying. Amy is over the moon about her coming niece and nephew and is planning a baby shower as soon as they get back and settled.

She is also anxious to turn in the certificate that Grace and Daniel had given them for a weekend of baby sitting. She adores her son but two months in the hospital and a motel with him leave her needing a break. She really also needs uninterrupted time with her husband without nurses and doctors coming in.

#my oc's #learning to love #my writing #the military one #chapter 160 #slow recovery

4 notes · View notes

violetnotez · 5 years ago

Text

One Dance |2|

Kaminari x Dancer! Reader

Anon: Hello! ^v^ I just found your blog and I really like your writing! Would you mind doing a part two to the One Dance one-shot with Kaminari? I thought that one was really cute. >v< Thank you!

Omg anon I’m so sorry this took so long to write but I hope you enjoy! You may need to read Part 1 to understand the intial plot, but it may be readable without viewing it (????)

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 2000+

Warnings: maybe some mild cussing?

Summary: After you finally finish your video for a dance scholarship, Kaminari takes you out to ask you to be his-but he gets sidetracked when a group of friends want to butt in

(RULES | MASTERLIST| REQUESTS CLOSED)

Part 1

You and Kaminari had been practicing tirelessly for weeks now, teaching him each step, each turn, each musical note needed to make your vision come to life.

Kami was surprisingly a very good dance partner-he learned decently quick, had good musically, and was always optimistic. He had you laughing the whole time, whether it be him taking a ridiculous tumble or him just tickling your side when you two became closer during the dance. He always knew how to make you smile.

Denki was your best friend, and as much as you told yourself your feelings for him were only that of a love for a friend, you knew it was more.

And Kaminari felt the same way.

“You think it’s good enough to send in?” You asked nervously, you teeth mindlessly gnawing on your bottom lip.

“Of course it is y/n, we look sick!” He said excitedly, a blush creeping on his cheeks. He couldn’t help but feel a rush of heat whenever you bite your lips-it was something he loved and he couldn’t help but stare at you whenever you did it.

You huffed, your slightly damp locks clinging to the back of your neck.

“I don’t know...I just feel like I look kinda dumb...like look at that spin I didn’t even point my toes all the way-“

Kaminari jumped up, interjecting you. He could never understand why you doubted yourself so much-in his eyes, you were simply amazing and absolutely perfectly imperfect to him. From the way you smiled, to your laugh, to even when you rolled your eyes at him when he was being annoying-he couldn’t get enough of you.

“Y/n-you look great. Seriously-you look freaking stunning! Don’t be worried about it, just post it!”

You looked down, your head spinning from Denki calling you “stunning”- it made your insides feel warm and ticklish, but did he really mean it? Maybe he was just being nice…..

“I don’t know….one more run-I just don’t feel good about it-“

Kaminari has heard enough of your insecurities, deciding to reach across your lap and yank your laptop away from you.

“Hey what are you-“ you cried, your stomach doing somersaults as Kaminari laid across your lap. his fingers working quickly to send in the video, his stomach lying on top of your criss-crossed legs.

“Got it-Ta-da!” He beamed at the screen, the white confirmation page making his honey yellow eyes strikingly bright.

Fear filled your stomach as you realized you couldn’t take back what Kaminari just didn-you knew you had to send in the video-it was due at 12am, and it was already inching towards 11 pm. But your anxiety stilled caused you to want to wait, to take a few more takes, to practice a little more….. you knew if it weren’t for Denki, you probably ever send in the video.

“Kami!” You yelled in mock anger, “Why'd you have to go and do that!”

Kaminari rolled off your stomach, crouching next to you. He was confused-were you really mad at him? He didn’t mean to make you upset-he just saw how amazingly talented you were. He wanted you to win this scholarship, so you could pursue your dreams: he just wanted you to be happy.

He crouched, searching your face with so much intent you were having trouble keeping your angry facade.

“What’s the matter? We had to send it at some point.”

“I know, it’s just-I wanted it to be perfect. I really need this money, Kami.”

“I know...and you are gonna get that money! Just you wait, you’ll be getting that ‘Congratulations’ email before you know it,” he gave you a playful wink,your breath hitching from it.

His face broke from his playful demeanor, worry crawling through.

“You're not mad at me though, right?”

You sighed, wracking a hand through your hair before you flashed him a small smile.

“I could never stay mad at you Kami.”

“Good!” He grinned, your smile making his heart pace. “Cause I wanted to take you somewhere.”

You cocked your head, confusion riddled in your brows. “Somewhere? Where did you have in mind?”

Kaminari shrugged nonchalantly, trying to hide the massive amount of panic flooding his body.

“Just to grab a bite-how about some ice cream?”

You smiled, nerves flooding your body. You knew you shouldn’t be nervous around him, he was your best friend after all. But every time you two hanged out, it made you feel as if you were on a first date-except you weren’t, and it made you slightly saddened that it wasn’t. But he was your best friend, and you didn’t want to ruin that-you couldn’t lose him.

“Sure! Why not?” You grinned, Denki handing you his hand to help you get up. He pulled you up with that surprising amount of strength he had-all that hero training had given him a lot of control and power in his body, something you admired as well as secretly fawned over.

His hand was warm and calloused against yours, Denki praying to god you weren’t feeling how sweaty he was. He was extremely nervous-because you had no idea what he was planning.

After spending every day after school working on this scholarship with you, he had realized he couldn’t hide his feelings for you anymore-every time you touched him, even if it was just a light brush on his skin, made him feel like he was short circuiting. Everytime you smiled at him it made his head race, and everytime he got to hold you made his heart soar. He couldn’t bear the idea of you being with anyone but him-it would crush him if you were someone else and he didn’t even at least try to win you over. He knew the consequences of him revealing his true feelings-he could lose you as his best friend-but he was ready to risk that. He was ready to risk it all just for the chance to call you his.

“You ready for the best night of your life??” He chuckled cheerfully, trying to be as cheery as possible.

You laughed, loving the infectious way Kaminari could be so happy and bright, your cheeks warm as he still held firmly onto your hand.

“Let me get my stuff-and we’ll get this ‘Best Night’ going,” you smiled, sadly letting go of his hand so you could grab your wallet and quickly freshen up from dancing.

Kaminari sighed, missing your smaller hand in his-but if this night went how he hoped it would, it would be more common. He had been planning this night for weeks-he had wanted to take you out somewhere nice sooner, to ask you if you’d be his, but you were so worried over your dance routine that he didn’t want to bombard you with his emotions. It was never in Kaminari’s nature to be patient, but for you, he made an exception and did his best to keep in his emotions. He was practically exploding at this point, annoying all of Baku Squad now with all his questions-like where to take you, what to do, how to drop the question. Mina has been the most supportive, helping to plan the whole stunt while Sero and Kirishima added in their own ideas. But now Mina would exasperatedly tell him to just “trust his instincts”, Bakugo grumbling how much of an idiot he was.

But how was supposed to “trust his instincts”- half the time his “instincts” got him in trouble or hurt. He shoved his hands into his joggers, willing his racing heart to go at a steadier best.. He had to calm down-if he didn’t this night would never go well.

“ice cream?” You asked, looking at the outside of the vintage red building. “Isn’t this a little fancy for late night food?”

“Where’s you expect us to go,” he laughed nervously, “Taco Bell?”

You shrugged, a little confused-Kaminari was the biggest foodie for fast food-anything with a sodium content that could inflate you like a balloon was all he ever ate. So him actually wanting to go eat somewhere relatively nice was a shock to you.

“Well, kinda yeah…”

You stepped inside, a cool blast of chilly air freezing your still hot skin. The inside was just like an old school ice cream parlor-dainty 50s music played, the fluorescent lights making the black and white tiles of the floor gleam like bright stars. The walls were adorned with memorabilia from many years ago, making it feel like you stepped back in time.

“Oh my god Kaminari,” you gasped, “where did you even find this place?? It’s adorable!”

He beamed like a happy puppy who did his first trick correctly-he had a hunch you would like the place after scrounging the web for hours for an interesting place to take you, but was so worried you wouldn’t like it at all.

“Cmon babe, I knew you well enough!” He joked, his cheeks red-he always called you babe, it was a simple and innocent pet name he had for you, but now with his intentions to make your relationship more intimate it was almost crossing a line.

Your cheeks were red too, that bittersweet word making your spine tingle. You loved it when he called you ‘babe’, but you didn’t expect him to like you back like you did-it reminded you that someday he’d be calling someone else that, and it stung. You brushed it off, trying not to pay attention to the resounding thumping in your chest.

You walked in, your face in awe by the adorable beauty of the parlor, Kaminari staring at you dreamily. You looked so cute when you were completely in shock-oh crap, you just smiled at him-he felt his head spin from that small gesture-Geez you’d be the end of him.

“What do you think you’re gonna get Kami?” You asked, his face in a daze.

“Huh?” He shook his head, his long locks shimmering in the lights. “Oh-uh-I don’t know! Everything looks really good…”

He stuffed his hand in his pockets, looking around the store. He could care less what he ate-he just needed to find the perfect place to sit...somewhere secluded but not so far away that you got creeped out being that alone with him..:he didn’t want you thinking he was taking you on a date prematurely. He continued to look around, until his eyes fell upon a group of very strangely dressed teens.

He cranes his head to get a better look at them.

They looked kinda familiar…

His heart jumped painfully-all of them were wearing black hoodies, the girl with painfully noticeable pink skin wearing sunglasses, two of the boys wearing fake mustaches, and the other one was pouting like a certain hothead he knew-

“You gotta be kidding me.”

He anxiously looked around, hoping against hope his group of friends didn’t bring anybody else-to his relief everyone else he saw were complete strangers. Then he turned to you, and to his relief, you were still looking at the menu and debating what to buy.

“Hey,um , I gotta go use the bathroom-“ he said hastily, “Ill be back before you know it!”

“Hm?” You hummed, “Okay Kami-“

You turned around, and were met with an empty space next to you-he had seemingly disappeared.

As you were trying to figure out how the living hell Kaminari had left so quickly, he was dodging other customers in the building, making a beeline to his friends, who were enjoying little bowls of slightly melted ice cream.

“What the hell are all doing here?!” He asked accusingly, placing both his hands on the wooden table.

“Omg hey Kami!” Mina greeted, ignoring the look of annoyance on his face. “You’re kinda late-you said you were gonna take y/n here at 10:30, it’s already been like an hour!”

“Wait- you’ve been waiting here?! Why?!”

Sero grinned at his friend.

“You looked pretty nervous when you were talking about asking y/n out earlier, so we decided to come to support you-“

“And make sure you don’t screw it up!” Mina interjected loudly, popping a red cherry off of Bakugo’s sundae into her mouth.

Kaminari shook his head, his mind racing-this was not good, not good at all. They were going to make this so much worse-you were going to see them, they would accidentally let it slip that he was trying to ask you out on a date-the possibilities were endless of how this could end disasterdly.

“Dude, Kami-chill our alittle, you're gonna scare y/n if you're sweating so much,” Kirishima said softly, noting the terror glossing Kaminaris eyes.

“Well, if a certain group of friends weren’t sabotaging a certain very special night for me, I would t be sweating so much in the first place!” He yelled accusingly, gaining a shocked look from his friends.

Kaminari sighed, wracking a hand through his golden locks, willing himself to calm down.

“Look guys, I appreciate the gesture, but I can handle this, just-“

Mina slammed her hand down gently, standing up at eye level with Kaminari.

“No! I am one of y/n’s closest friend and one of your only gal friends,” she stated, “you two are meant for each other and I know it! So I am not going to sit here knowing there is a slight chance your chaotic ass is going to screw this up!”

Mina gave a stern look to Kami, his eyes going wide.

“I think what Mina is trying to say is she just wants to look out for you-we all do!” Kirishima grinned nervously, taking Mina shoulder gently, setting her back in her seat.

“Just Don’t fucking mess this up,” Bakugo grunted in a sulk. “I could care less if you get with her-I just don’t want to hear your whining after she says no because you screwed up.”

“Aww look Bakugo actually cares!” Sero laughed, gaining a death glare from Bakugo himself.

Kirishima turned to Kaminari, flashing him a toothy grin.

“You're gonna do great man-just be kind to her, respect her boundaries, and you should be good to go!”

Mina smiles devilishly, lowering her red heart shaped glasses slightly.

“I have been shipping you two since day one, so I am going to sit my pretty pink self and make sure I get a front row seat to give you emotional support-as well as take some cute pics!”

Kaminari grinned weakly-his friends could be a pain but he knew deep down they meant well.

“Go get her tiger!” She squealed, earning a hush from Sero as Kaminari went back to you, 10 times more nervous than before.

The rest of the night surprisingly went smoother than he thought-he had paid for you guys food (something you had tried to stop him to do, but he had stuffed his credit card into the chip reader before you could). You then found a place to sit, Kaminari breathing a sigh of relief when you didn’t even notice the group of embarrassingly annoying teens that were eyeing your every move. Kirishima threw him a thumbs up, the mustache still glued to his face as Kaminari gave him a tiny grin. He had made sure you sat on the side of the booth where your back would face away from his friends, his eyes focusing between your smiling face and the smug looks Bakusquad was throwing him.

You two talked about everything and anything- from school to your own futures to hobbies to really anything that came to your minds. Kaminari started to relax slightly, acting silly and laughing constantly as he usually was around you. He loved seeing your face light up when you got excited, or how your sweet laugh just burst out of you with ease. If dating you would feel this good, he would never want anyone else. Everything was still normal, and you didn’t suspect a thing-or at least he didn’t think you suspected anything. You two had just finished your ice creams, still in the middle of a conversation but ready to leave. Kaminari’s heart quickened, his nerves resurfacing as his phone suddenly buzzed.

Bakugo: Hey dunce face hurry it up I should be sleeping by now

Sero: Ahhahah Bakugo past his bedtime?

Bakugo: shut up Soy Sauce before I burn that look off ur face!

Kirishima: Alright lets calm down a little

Sero: Yeah once he gets his bottle before bedtime

Bakugo: I WILL RIP YOU FACE OFF

Mina: Stop it! So when are you asking the question?

Kaminari: I dont know just give me a sec

Mina: well hurry it up it’s getting late and I think it’s getting to Bakugo’s head

That’s when he heard Bakugo begin to start yelling, his eyes wide with fear as the ash blonde’s hood feel off as he aggressively yelled at his friends. All of Baku Squad immediately piled on top of him, forcing him to sit down, which only made him angrier.

To Kaminaris horror, you had heard the ruckus too, turning around to see what was going on.

Before you could fully look, he grabbed your hand, desperate to keep you from seeing his chaotic friends.

“Y/n wait-“

Your heart raced instantly, feeling his hand in yours. It was warm, calloused yet soft at the same time-it felt perfect against your own, and you relished the slight buzz of electricity coming from it.

Kaminari noticrd the shock on your face, wondering why until he realized he was holding your hand, heat rising to his cheeks.

It was now or never at this point.

He sighed, realizing now was the best time to tell you.

“Y/n-I-Ive liked you for a long time. Like-a lot-more than just a friend. I tried to ignore it, but-it just seems impossible. Your the only girl I can think about, and-I-Just-I was hoping, if it was alright with you, if I could make you mine...and ask you out on a date?”

You stared at him in complete disbelief, your eyes wide. How was this even happening? He had feelings for you-was this a dream?

Kaminari took your silence the wrong way, beginning to ramble.

“You don’t have to If you don’t want to-I get it we can just continue to be friends and you can forget all about me saying anything about-“

“Kami, I would love to go on a date with you...I’ve actually felt the same for a really long time,” you blushed, your fingers brushing his skin.

“You have?!” Now it was his to be in shock, his skin turning a tomato red as he yelled in surprise.

You giggled at his outburst, reaching for his hand again as you jumped out of the booth.

“Wanna start heading out?”

“Uh-uh sure!” He stammered, nervous again to grab your hand but loving how it felt in his own.

As you two began to leave, you were stopped by none other than Bakusquad themselves.

“Oh hey guys!” You waved, your hands still interlocked with Denki’s.

“Hey girlie!” Mina ran over giving you a quick hug, taking note of your rosy cheeks and intertwined hands.

“Whoa-so you two are a thing now-would have never guessed that!'' She said over enthusiastically, sending a wink to Kaminari.

“I’m so happy for you guys!” Kirishima yelled happily. “And I’m really glad it all worked out!”

You looked at Kaminari, his cheeks growing redder-did they know something about all this?

“Uh-what that’s supposed to-“

“Welp it was great talking to you guys!” Kamianri yelled out quickly , “but I think it’s time for us to head out, so-we’ll see you tomorrow!”

Kaminari rushes you out, the snickers of Baku Squad getting quieter as he took you out the door.

Even if he was embarrassed by his friends, he couldn’t get over the fact that you had said “yes”, and he just couldn’t stop smiling by that.

--------------------------

#bnha #bnha x reader #Kaminari Denki #kaminari denki x reader #kaminari x reader #mha kaminari #bnha kaminari x reader #bnha kaminari fluff #bnha kaminari x you #bnha kaminari #denki x reader #bnha denki x reader #bnha denki x y/n #mha kaminari x reader #mha kaminari fluff #mha denki

87 notes · View notes

evalinkatrineberg · 5 years ago

Text

Leana

A/N: A little interlude, including an RP with @leanarg , who is so sweet and lovely and amazing!! We love to see it.

I read the email over again, just to be sure that I really hadn’t missed anything. Maybe there had been some phrasing that I had misinterpreted the previous four times I had read it, or maybe something had gotten mixed up when I had been carbon copied on the email - either way, there had to be a mistake somewhere. This couldn’t be it. This couldn’t be my only option.

Dr. Hammond,

I’d be more than happy to allow Miss Evalin Berg to use the lab work she has done for me over the course of her time at this university to count for her biochemistry lab credits. In fact, I’ll CC her on this email, to make sure she sees this as well. My only stipulation is that if she does decide to use the lab work she did for me as her biochemistry lab credits, I will have to have her name redacted in the publications she contributed to. It’s simply department policy; you know how it goes.

This stipulation would not apply, of course, should she return and complete her biochemistry lab in person. The decision is ultimately hers to make.

Yours truly,

Dr. Janine Proctor

Evalin,

Please notify me of your decision on this matter at your earliest convenience.

Dr. Fiona Hammond

No. Nothing had changed, no words had miraculously rearranged themselves to shed new light on the meaning of this email. Neither of my options were good. Either risk taking an incomplete for my first of two semesters of biochemistry, and possibly delay my graduation because of it, or lose the shred of credit given to my name for helping Proctor with her experiments, and for conducting an experiment of my own creation under her careful guidance. Both options left me with a bleak vision of the future.

With a sigh, I closed out my email, clicking my phone locked and placing it on my desk. I leaned back in my chair, my head facing towards the ceiling as I rubbed at my temples with the heels of my hands. Which of these options was the lesser of two evils? I had never felt so unsure of something in my life, and that was saying a lot, considering the last conversation I had had with Idalia, after Arin and I had kissed in the library. How had it come to this? I had gone from kissing Arin and feeling flustered, yet on top of the world, to showing him the work I had accomplished and promptly making a fool of myself in front of him, only to likely have the work I had shown him ripped out from under me. To say that these past few weeks had been a roller coaster would be inaccurate. These past few weeks had been a race down a double black diamond, and I was an inexperienced skier who should probably still be on the bunny hill.

Maybe these weren’t my only options, though. Idalia had somehow pulled some strings to attend fencing practices outside of the palace - perhaps I could similarly find a way to complete my biochemistry lab at Angeles University.

I immediately shook the idea out of my head. There simply wasn’t enough time in the day for me to do that, and besides, I’d probably already missed the deadline to get into such a class there. Even if they made an exception, given my situation, it likely wouldn’t last. Once Proctor caught wind of what I was doing - and I had no doubt that she would - she’d put in a bad word against me, and I’d likely be kicked to the curb again.

It can’t hurt to at least ask, can it?

Yes, it could hurt. That was a lesson I definitely should have learned by now, given my last conversation with Arin. I couldn’t afford to get my hopes up, only to be let down once again. There was only so much I could take.

Besides, there was so much else to do. Wylan’s birthday party was fast approaching, and I hadn’t even begun to work on my costume. I quite enjoyed the theme, if I was being honest. Star Wars had been one of the movie series that all of my siblings and I could agree upon as being fun to watch. My father used to gather all of us up on rainy days during the late spring, when the Tennessee River had flooded the main roads and we couldn’t get anywhere that wasn’t in our own neighborhood. He would make a large bowl of popcorn and let us marathon one of the trilogies. It was likely just a ploy to keep us kids out of our mother’s hair, but we all looked forward to it regardless. Something about Star Wars had encaptured all of our young minds, and brought us all a little closer together.

Now, the question remained - who was I going to go as? On top of that, what was I going to get Wylan for his birthday? I had only met him once, and those circumstances had been rather unfortunate, in terms of making a first impression. Safiya had said that we didn’t have to get him anything, but it went against the manners I had been taught growing up to arrive empty-handed. Besides, I should at least thank him for not ratting me and Idalia out. Maybe I’d simply get him a card, to do just that.

My first question, however, was something I could actively work on, and something that took far less emotional energy to figure out. I pushed myself to my feet, grabbing my phone and striding across the floor to my door in a matter of seconds, not waiting to hear it close behind me as I made my way down to the room I had heard a lot of the other girls mention when talking about costumes for the party. Perhaps I could find some inspiration there.

It took me a while to find it, but I couldn’t keep my eyes from going wide once I did. The entire room was just filled to the brim with different fabrics - on mannequins, in baskets, on tables. It was like nothing I’d ever seen before! I bet Missy would really enjoy this. The corners of my lips twitched upwards briefly as I recalled my encounter with the sweet girl from Midston in the kitchens a week or so ago. I was willing to bet she was rather familiar with this kind of environment, given her line of work.

A flurry of motion caught my eye, dragging my attention away from the sheer, salmon-colored fabric I had been studying up until that moment. At one of the big tables in the center of the room sat Leana, who was now smiling and waving at me. I had only really spoken to Leana once, and that had been more in passing than anything else. It also hadn’t been one of my shining moments, to say the least.

I offered her a small smile in return, walking over towards the table she was seated at with another woman, who I assumed was one of her maids. There was a chance that Leana wouldn’t even remember our brief encounter, after all. I might as well be polite. “Hello! Leana, right?”

She immediately nodded. “Hello! I know you are Evalin, the one with the basket gifts,” she replied with a chuckle. So she did remember the one time we had conversed prior to this, then. Already, this conversation was going worse than I had hoped it would be. That had to be a new record, even for me.

I felt the blood rushing to my cheeks as I responded, “Right, that.” I dropped my eye contact with her, looking first to the side, and then back to the table I now stood in front of. There had to be something else to talk about, a different topic of conversation that didn’t make me want to crawl back to my room as I remembered all the mistakes I had made over the past few months. “What are you working on?”

Leana looked down, biting her lip. “Oh, I’m not really doing anything. She’s the talented one here” - her eyes darted to the side, towards where her maid sat - “It’s about the costume for the party.” At the mention of the upcoming function, her voice dropped to little more than a whisper. It was smart, I realized. You never knew who might be listening, after all. We wouldn’t want to ruin the surprise for Wylan, especially not after Safiya had put so much effort into planning it.

“Don’t worry,” I reassured her with a small smile. “I’m here for the same reason, though I’ll admit I haven’t given a ton of thought to who I’m going to go as yet.” That much was the whole truth. I had already been running through an exhaustive list of female characters from Star Wars movies, but every time I settled on one, I’d think up a reason as to why it wouldn’t work. It was getting more frustrating than it was worth, if I was being honest with myself. Perhaps I just wouldn’t dress up. That’d certainly be easier.

Leana hummed thoughtfully, tilting her head towards the left. “Which are your options?”

“I was thinking about going as Jyn Erso, but dressing as her would feel so different from what we normally wear here,” was the response I finally settled on, laughing ever so slightly, though the sound was hollow and tinny to my ears. I really liked the character of Jyn Erso - found her rather relatable in some aspects, in fact - but I just knew that some of the other girls would be showing up in beautifully designed dresses, having given this facet of the party a good deal of thought. If I showed up as Jyn Erso, how out of place was I going to feel? Plus, there was the fact that I looked nothing like Jyn to begin with.

“Well, I think that’s pretty much the point,” Leana replied with a laugh. “Space warriors in a palace - it will be fun!” Her tone was unfailingly positive and upbeat. She was likely an optimist, then. Interesting, considering the dark sides of reality than many people in her field of study tended to uncover. Her demeanor reminded me a bit of my younger brother Randall’s personality, namely the manner in which she held onto the hope that the world was innately good.

You’re analyzing this with way too much depth.

“True.” I inclined my head to the right, biting the inside of my cheek before looking at Leana again. With a small laugh, I attempted to explain myself. “Something about wearing cargo pants in the palace just feels so odd, though.”

“Better than a hairy chewy costume,” she shot back without hesitation, snickering. “I will be going as Rey, so it’s an easy, comfortable one.” At least I wasn’t going to be the only one not in a super fancy gown, then. The thought was reassuring. The way Leana’s smile faltered once she finished speaking, however, was not comforting in the slightest.

I felt my own smile soften as I looked at her. She must have a memory tied to the character of Rey, then. Did it make her homesick, or was there something more to her reaction? I didn’t want to pry, but out of anybody here, I was sure she would be the most likely to understand my own curiosity. “Have you dressed up for themed parties like this before?”

“Yes, college parties could be wild.” With a smile and a sideways glance in my direction, she continued, “What about you? You are still in college too, right?”

“Yes,” I replied instantly, weekends spent with June and Lukas flashing before my eyes like a PowerPoint slideshow on double speed, “and the parties can indeed be pretty crazy.”

I had never been a big party person in high school. I knew that they were happening, but I didn’t know where, or any of the specifics, for that matter. Parties were June’s thing. I was never invited. It hadn’t been until college that I had finally let June drag me out a few times, and I had definitely allowed myself to loosen up a bit in those scenarios. Many games of spin the bottle, stack cup, and chicken in the pool littered my memory, tinged with a slight alcohol induced haze. The one event June would never let me live down, though, had occurred at the beginning of the fall semester my sophomore year, when I had gotten into a shot contest with a couple of fraternity boys at a darty. I remembered taking eight shots, but I had blacked out immediately after that. According to June, though, that hadn’t stopped me from continuing, and ultimately winning the competition, only to promptly ask her to drive me back to her house, where I had for all intents and purposes passed out in her bed.

That experience had definitely been a mistake, and I was still unsure how I hadn’t died of alcohol poisoning that night, but I found myself grinning nonetheless. Yet, there was one common trend that set these college parties apart from the ones Leana had apparently been to. My grin quickly turned to a frown. “Though I didn’t go to many, and the ones I did go to weren’t really themed like this is.”

“Yeah, I was practically dragged by my friend to them.” She shrugged as I marveled at how similar our experiences could have been, if that was true. As my frown turned back into a smile, her smile turned into a frown. “You’re still in college, right? Biology?”

What about my major had her frowning? Had she heard something about my situation with Proctor through the grapevine? I was sure she had an exhaustive list of sources who would somehow be privy to such information. The thought didn’t sit well with me, but I did my best to push it aside. I’d deal with it another time.

“My best friend was the same way. She was the only reason I really ever got out of the lab.” The thought of June brought a smile to my face, but the expression didn’t linger long as my thoughts turned back to my work under Proctor - or rather, just Proctor’s work, now, I supposed. “I’m a biology major, though, yes. You study journalism, right?”

Leana nodded along, interjecting with a chuckle every now and then until I finished speaking. At that point, she pressed her lips together, almost apprehensive as she began to answer my own question to her. “Yes, I do. I’m also working for a newspaper.” A smile briefly flitted across her face, but it sputtered out as quickly as it had been lit into existence.

“That’s awesome!” She was working, doing something she enjoyed, and making a name for herself. It was quite respectable, in my opinion. “What kind of articles do you write, if you don’t mind my asking?”

She blinked, but then answered, “I’m currently writing for the digital blog covering events, concerts and interviewing famous people.” Her smile didn’t reach her eyes, as if she wasn't exactly enthusiastic about any of the work she was doing. Why would she be doing it then? Surely it was time consuming. If it wasn’t what she wanted to do, why didn’t she focus on another pursuit that made her happier? She was younger than me, if I remembered correctly, so it shouldn’t be too late for her to change her major, or her career, if she wanted to.

Leana took a trick out of my book then, and quickly changed the topic of conversation. “What about you? What are you working on in the lab?”

Currently, nothing. “My professor and I were working on cancer research using genetics, but,” I paused, pondering whether or not it was worth it to attempt to explain the whole situation to Leana. If anybody already knew about it, or was going to find out about it at some point, it would be her. She might as well hear it from the horse’s mouth, I supposed. “I’m sure she’s continued it without me there, even though it was my idea. It’s not like I would’ve gotten any of the credit anyway, though.” I finished with a sigh, shrugging. There was simply nothing I could do about it, at this point. I had made my bed. Now, I had to lie in it.

She raised her eyebrows, and then frowned. “What do you mean? If it was your idea there must be a way to take the credit you deserve.”

If only she knew. I simply shook my head, giving Leana a small close lipped smile. “She’s in charge, and she’s in the lab right now, and I’m not, nor do I think I’ll ever be in her lab again, no matter how this ends.” I waved my hand through the air dismissively, hoping that the gesture in and of itself would bring an end to the conversation

I should’ve known better than that. Leana blinked a few times, pursing her lips for a while before speaking. “Okay, wait, I just have to ask,” she paused, her voice softer when she continued, “why did you leave her with the project in the first place?”

As if I had a choice! What was I going to do, fly a whole lab with me from Carolina to Angeles? I frowned. “Well, it was done in her lab, which she’s in charge of, so I didn’t have much of a say in the matter.”

“But why can’t you come back to it?” She bobbed her head, at the same time that I came to the realization that I really hadn’t explained that portion of it well. “Well if things turn out that way.”

I winced, knowing I would have to try to explain further, while still being as vague as possible, so as not to incriminate myself in any way. “We had a falling out of sorts before I left to come here, and I don’t think there’s any coming back from it,” I began, shaking my head, “but there’s other jobs out there, right?”

Leana opened her mouth, but then closed it again, pursing her lips slightly. “Um, yes I guess there are.”

Change the subject, now! “So, you’re still writing, even with being here, and all?”

She sighed, shaking her head dismissively. “I have been writing things about all the work that’s done here. Learning a little bit about everything, but I don’t have a purpose for it yet.” Despite the end of her last sentence, she was grinning. She definitely liked writing the. So why had she seemed so unhappy with her job earlier?

I decided to focus on her project instead, narrowing my eyes as I attempted to conceptualize what she was describing. “Like a little memoir, of sorts?”

She nodded. “Yeah, or a little behind the scenes.” She shrugged, pausing to smile before adding, “I like to write about the things no one really sees, but now I have been considering including some good life stories I have learned as well.” Her eyes darted to and from the various people working around us. The palace staff did indeed have interesting life stories, from what I had heard from the ones I had interacted with. I was certain whatever Leana was writing would do them justice, and make an good read.

I had to smile. “I like it. I think there’s a lot to be learned from the lives of others.”

“You think?” One of her eyebrows shot up her forehead. Is it really so surprising to hear me say something like that? I supposed it must be, which didn’t leave me with a great taste in my mouth. “Would you read something like it?”

I nodded enthusiastically, intent on making sure Leana understood the truth of the matter. “For sure! I think it’d be really interesting to learn more about the lives of the people here.”

For a moment, we sat in silence, me attempting to smile, and Leana biting her lip. You could’ve heard a pin drop, which was odd for the palace, to say the least. I had grown so accustomed to the flurry of activity and words casually being tossed around that the absence of that energy almost had me on edge.

Thankfully, Leana spoke up, her voice quiet as she offered me a small smile. “I would like to write a story where the nice biologist comes back to the lab and fights for some rights.”

Her intentions were good, I was sure, and yet the statement had me reeling. The thought of facing Proctor again seemed so improbable, so unlikely, that it was hard to even imagine. Even if I was eliminated, which I was sure was likely, given the odds, I couldn’t picture myself simply returning to life as it had used to be. I wanted to continue my studies, of course, but maybe it was time to branch out a bit, and consider other universities. Proctor might have a big reach nationally, but what about abroad? That might be an option I’d have to look into.

Another daydream tantalized me from the periphery of my mind, flitting in and out of focus. The image of me, returning to Knoxville as the winner of the Selection, and taking back what Proctor was attempting to take from me was undeniably desirable. I radiated a certain level of power in that scenario, like I knew I was successful and wasn’t about to let anybody give me grief about it. It was the impression I had always wanted to have on others, I realized. Did I really need to win this to become that, though? I’d already gained so much from being here for this long. Maybe Leana had a point.

I flashed her a smile, though it was forced and tense. “Believe me, if I had my professor’s reputation and respect in the field, I would argue my case. Thank you, though.”

“Yes, I get that, it’s just scary to think about a plan B after you put all the effort in the plan A.” A look of worry flashed across her face as she sighed, dropping her gaze back down towards the table.

I couldn’t stop myself, exhaling through my nose as I nodded in agreement. “I can understand you on that one. Do you have a plan B?” The words flew out of my mouth before I even had the chance to consider that her worry was likely about just that. “You don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to!”

Leana just let out a sad chuckle, her eyes flicking back up to mine. “I’m at the point where I don’t know which is which. What about you?”

I had to consider that for a moment. Plan A had always been the same for me - go to college, get my degree, get a research job, move out, get a dog, get married, maybe have a child or two - “the American dream,” I believed my grandfather had referred to it as. Being Selected had thrown a bit of a wrench in that, though. There had been moments of clarity, for sure - like after that first date with Arin, when I had been sure he was about to send me home. My old plan A had stood out in my mind then. After the kiss, though, I wasn’t so sure. Maybe I was simply a naive fool, sure, but I couldn’t deny that I felt something for Arin. Yet, I wasn’t entirely certain that that set a new plan A, in which I won Arin’s heart and in turn this Selection, and figured the rest out from there, in stone. Once again, the odds weren’t in my favor.

“I’m pretty much in the same boat, I’m afraid,” I answered with a sigh. “I never pictured it’d come to this.” I really hadn’t thought I’d make it this far.

“I’m sorry.”

I almost laughed as the words left Leana’s mouth. That was my line! On top of that, she had no reason to be sorry. It wasn’t her fault that I had gotten myself into this mess.

Was this what I sounded like to everybody else?

“I hope you figure things out,” she continued. “Maybe Prince Arin could help.” Her voice went up a few notes at the end of her sentence, making it sound more like a question than a piece of advice.

Could he? The concept of Arin doing anything for me felt so foreign that I couldn’t even picture him in the same room as Proctor. The more I had thought about it after my conversation with Idalia, the more I had realized how little of a give-and-take there was between Arin and I. I was left with a lot of questions that he wouldn’t answer, and even if he had questions for me, he wouldn’t ask them, and depending on what they were, I also probably wouldn’t answer. Maybe we were really just that bad for each other.

You know he doesn’t love you, right?

Lukas’s voice echoed through my head, rattling against the walls of my mind like an angry bee caught under a plastic cup. I didn’t know whether or not Arin even liked me, and despite Idalia’s advice, I was much too afraid to ever ask him as much outright. There was a kind side to Arin, I was still sure of that. He had helped me with my nosebleed, and he had been willing to recommend me books, and possibly even read my own research, but thinking that over, it all seemed so lackluster. Noncommittal. Not that I could blame him for not committing to any of us, at this point. Not when the entire nation was watching him attempt to date thirty-five girls with the goal of making one of them his wife. After all, I myself had even told him that ending the Selection now would make him look hasty and rash.

I had really played myself in saying that, hadn’t I?

I let out a breathy laugh, dragging myself out of the recesses of my own mind. “Maybe, but I’m not counting on it.” I couldn’t count on it, truly.

“We never know,” Leana replied with a chuckle, shrugging ever so slightly.

I shook my head, relating to that statement more than she could possibly know, I was sure. “Does anyone ever know what to expect from him?”

“I know.” She frowned for a moment, but it quickly turned into a small smile, laced with something akin to sympathy. “He's a bit complicated.”

“Yeah.” I nodded, making a mental note to nominate that sentence for Understatement of the Year. I remembered a previous conversation with Arin, spoken over two cups of bourbon in an alcove. With a wry laugh, I finished, “He’s working on it, though.”

“True, I noticed that too.” As she spoke, Leana began fidgeting with the ends of her hair, twisting and rubbing them this way and that between her fingertips. Did her hair not knot when she did that? I had never thought I would be so jealous of the protein structure of somebody else’s hair, and yet here I was.

Leana continued, unfazed by my staring. “Just the mixed messages have me confused at times.”

I could get behind that statement - I had had multiple conversations about as much, recently. With an enthusiastic nod, I replied, “Agreed. Some days, I feel like we might genuinely have a connection, and others, I can’t figure out why he hasn’t sent me home yet.”

She snickered, the sound almost out of place in the otherwise silent room. “Sorry,” she said again, “it's just that I have that last thought a lot.”

Well, I was glad it wasn’t just me, then, but I still couldn’t help but feel bad that he was putting all of us through this. I could understand him leaving me baffled - I was book smart, but not people smart in the slightest. I got confused by almost anyone who I hadn’t known for a good while. For someone like Leana, though, who was in a line of work where interpersonal communication must be one of her strong suits, to be so confused by Arin, spoke volumes.

Leana forged on yet again. “But a connection huh? That sounds good!”

“No worries!” I laughed along, though I was beginning to wonder if I should have phrased my words differently. My smile began to fall before I could stop myself, and reign in my emotions. “Yeah, sometimes we get along very well. I’m sorry he has you feeling so confused, though. It’s frustrating.” And relatable.

She waved her hand through the air, the dismissive gesture one that I often caught myself making. “No, it's not really! I just think too much.” She must have noticed how surprised her words have left me this time, because after a moment, she decided to ask, “Something bad happened?”

“Oh, no!” I shook my head, forcing a smile to return to my face. I didn’t need Leana worrying about me, on top of Clemence and Idalia already having that job more than covered, apparently. Besides, Leana was beginning to remind me a lot of myself, which meant she probably had enough on her mind as it was. “I was asking more about you. Sorry for the confusion!”

“You are sweet,” she responded with a laugh. “Don't worry, I will be fine.”

I smiled, feeling something start to buzz in my pocket. My phone. That was odd. Normally my family called on the weekends, unless it was an emergency.

I needed to leave, and quickly.

“Noted,” I said to Leana, taking a few slow steps backwards towards the door. “If you ever do need anything though, you know where to find me!”

I could only hope she knew that I meant it.

Her responding smile did much to assuage that concern. “Thank you, Evalin. I hope to see you at the party!”

“Likewise,” I replied, smiling as I turned on my heel and made my way towards the door.

As soon as I knew I was out of sight of the door, I fished around in my pocket for my phone, squinting as the light of the screen hit my eyes. The number was familiar, but not one of my family members. I practically sighed with relief before more questions began churning in my mind.

The number belonged to the corded phone in Proctor’s lab. That machine was so old that half of the time the other college students and I ripped into her for even keeping it in the lab after her lab had been renovated the year before I began my freshman year at university. Was she calling to gloat, then? It wouldn’t be entirely out of character for her to do so, and yet, it was late back in Carolina. She shouldn’t even be awake around this time.

With a sigh, and one last glance at the number, I picked up the call. “Hello?”

My blood turned to ice at the voice on the other end of the line. “Oh, Evalin! Thank God!”

Not Proctor. Not my father. My mouth was almost too dry to form words. “Lukas.”

“It’s good to hear your voice.” How he sounded so cheerful, like nothing had ever happened between the two of us, like we had never even fought, was beyond me. He had to be wilfully ignoring it. There was no other explanation.

“I can’t say the same,” I replied, swallowing. I had been spending more of my mental energy thinking about Lukas than I would have liked to after the kiss with Arin. It wasn’t that I felt the same for Lukas that I felt for Arin - quite the opposite, in fact. Something about kissing Arin, however, had brought back the memory of the last time I had been kissed.

Lukas. Under the mistletoe. In the lab.

Ever since then, I had been reevaluating my friendship with him. Or rather, what I had thought had been a friendship. I had never assumed it was anything more. I had never felt that way for him, and I definitely didn’t now. However, it was beginning to seem more and more likely that he had felt that way for me. Maybe he had even thought we were something more.

I wasn’t going to be the one to suck up my pride and ask him.

“Why are you calling?” I kept walking as I talked, letting my feet lead me down hallways and around corners, no destination in mind. I barely even knew where I was, if I was being honest. Every now and then, I’d pass someone from the palace staff, inevitably carrying half a million things in their arms, who’d shoot me a perplexed look, but move on without questioning me further.

On the other end of the line, Lukas sighed. “Well, you wouldn’t pick up my calls.”

“I know,” I replied, turning another corner. “I blocked you.”

He was silent, save for his breathing. Then, “Things are getting bad here.”

My eyebrows rose, unamused. “How so?”

“Your father had an argument with Proctor the other day. I don’t know if he even realized that I was there.”

“Well,” I began, attempting to suppress the laugh I had almost barked out, “Can you blame him? Or has she not told you any of the shit she’s done to mess up my life?”

“You could have prevented this.” His voice was softer, which somehow grated my nerves. Did he expect me to feel sorry for him? He and I had been put in the same position by Proctor, we had just chosen different answers. Yes, I was suffering for it now, but I would survive. The world was more than just Proctor’s lab. I knew that now.

“Could I have?”

His voice cracked. “You could have come home.”

Just like that, I was thrown back into the memory of when I had first met Lukas. It had been our physics lab, freshman year. Paired together because our last names were close together alphabetically, I hadn’t thought much of him at first. He hadn’t smiled the entire fifty minutes we had been in class that day - not that I had cared much, seeing as someone who took the class seriously was more likely to get a good grade. It wasn’t until I had thrust my phone in his direction and prompted him to enter his number that I had seen any flicker of emotion on his face. A flash of surprise. Then he had entered his number.

After that, our friendship had started to take form. First, it had been a common major, and a shared interest in biology at the cellular level. Then he had offered to run with me and June, framing it as an added layer of safety for the two of us. Later, we had realized that we both had Swendish grandparents. His still lived in Swendway, in fact. He had said he wasn’t very close with them, but he had still learned bits and pieces of the language when his father had lived with him and his mother.

From what I could gather, his father had been in and out of Lukas’s life for quite a few years, and he had been raised mostly by his mother, on her own. I didn’t know the full story, nor did I want to press him for details. He could tell me when he was ready, or at this point, he could tell me never. As selfish as I felt about thinking it, it really wasn’t my problem. We all faced challenges in our lives, and we all handled them differently. I was of the opinion that he hadn’t handled them well. Perhaps that made me the asshole. I really couldn’t bring myself to care.

“Arin hasn’t seen fit to send me home yet,” I responded, my face neutral as I continued walking, staring straight down an empty hallway.

“Arin.” He practically spat out the name, his tone harder now. “You’re on a first-name basis now?”

I blinked. “Yes. I would hope to be on a first name basis with the man I might end up marrying one day, if that's the decision we come to at the end of this.”

“Oh,” he laughed. “So, you haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, then?”

You know he doesn’t love you, right?

I had heard him loud and clear.

“Why are you calling?” I hated how tight my voice sounded. Water. I needed water. Water would help. There would be water in the kitchen. How did I get there from here, wherever here was?

“I heard Proctor tell your father that she looked forward to seeing his ghost wandering the halls of the biology building, at the end of their argument.” He cleared his throat, the sound so familiar it almost hurt. “I just thought you should know.”

I felt the color drain from my face, even as I replied, “Oh, good, so if he shows up dead somewhere, you can testify against Proctor in court.” Or do you not have the balls to do that, either?

I shouldn’t be this mad at him. A few months ago, I wouldn’t have been able to stand up to her either. I still wasn’t entirely sure what had compelled me to stand my ground the day before I had left for Angeles.

“I wouldn’t have to if you’d just come home, and forget this stupid fairytale fantasy of yours. You’ve done it! You’ve proven that you’re invaluable to us, easily likeable, and a face the world will be watching for the rest of the century.” His breathing was heavy on the other end of the line.

The door to the kitchen came into view. How had I even ended up here? I had been looking for this room, yes, but I hadn’t known where I was before. Maybe some higher power was looking out for me after all.

“That’s besides the point,” I argued, rolling my eyes as I walked into the kitchen. “Look -”

“Shit.” Silence. Then, “I’ve got to go.”

I opened my mouth to say something more, but the line had already gone dead. Just like that, he was gone, a phantom left in my memory only once more.

You know he doesn’t love you, right?

I had no idea.

#selectionoc

8 notes · View notes

tiaragqueen · 6 years ago

Text

Pin Down

✂ Pairing: Yandere! Gon Freecs x Reader

✂ Word Count: 1,8k

✂ Trigger Warning: Killing, blood, yandere theme

[Edited]

***

This boy is too precious to be a yandere, so he’s aged up in this one-shot.

If you like my writing, please support me on ko-fi!

“Jealousy is the jaundice of the soul.” - John Dryden

Sometimes, you wondered if it was your fault that this happened to you. You wondered what would happen if you weren’t so nice to him. You wondered what had gone wrong with him. You wondered what would happen if you didn’t accept his invitation. You wondered what would happen if he didn’t befriend you. You wondered what would happen if you didn’t fall for that bright smile of his.

And, most of all, you wondered how long has he been developing this sick feeling called ‘love’.

It couldn't even be called love as much as an infatuation, but Gon didn’t know that. He was a simple-minded guy. What he felt in the moment, he experienced it wholeheartedly. No half-assed displays, no poor attempts of hiding, and no lying. His emotions laid bare for everyone to see, and while it was a good – even admirable – quality, you’d learned soon enough that it could be a bad thing too.

A vice, you could say. It seemed to be the only flaw in his otherwise near-perfect appearance. You didn’t mean that he was pretending to be not, either. Again, Gon wasn’t fake. There was absolutely no reason for him to do it because his real personality was much more attractive.

Well, you just didn’t know any better. You just weren’t aware of his true personality. Because humans are complex creatures, and you’d only seen one facet – one layer – from him. One side that he showed to you only, unbeknownst to you. Because he was smart like that. Because you’d unknowingly underestimated his intelligence. Because you took his cheerful demeanor at face value.

But you couldn’t change him, could you? You weren’t some kind of skilled manipulator. You weren’t a liar that could easily twist him with sweet words. You were a good girl. You were a kind girl. You were a gullible girl. No amount of tears, prayers, and screams would ease the regret of being so stupid, so naïve as to believe that Gon was the same as you. That he was a good man. That he was a kind man. That he was a normal man. And no amount of tears, prayers, and screams would change your predicament for the better.

You were stuck here, in this small room bearing nothing but a bed and a chain around the bed pole to keep you attached. To prevent you from running away. To keep you with him always.

Had you done something to attract him? Had you done something that had set him off the wrong way? Had you done something to warrant such... attention from him? Was this the punishment for being too nice, too compliant, too innocent? You wondered and wondered, but you never came to a single answer. A single conclusion. A single explanation to give your muddled mind a rest. Some much-needed break you deserved. Some respite to prepare you to face the consequences of your actions. Of your responses.

You didn’t know, and you hated this. This ignorance, this optimistic mind that had only thought the best from people, this childish brain that refused to believe that there were people who could – and would – take advantage of you.

Sure, Gon had never taken advantage of you. He was such a good friend, such a cheerful guy that you couldn’t help but adore. However, he had also abused your trust in him by luring you into his trap disguised as a pure invitation of two friends hanging out.

And it was pure, indeed. At least, at first. You both watched your favorite movie and chatted about everything and anything that came to his mind until the topic of a crush was mentioned. You were curious about whether or not he had someone to like. That, and because you had a bit of a crush on him too. He was friendly, resourceful, determined, and adventurous. You didn't doubt that he could effortlessly convince an enemy to be his ally. Not to mention, he was a skilled Hunter. Anyone would be lucky to have him as either partner or lover.

Gon had blushed when you asked that bold question and answered in a shaky voice that you rarely heard from him. “I-I have, actually,” he said.

“Oh, who are they?”

“You.”

It was a straightforward reply in contrast to the lingering blush on his tan cheeks; one that left you flushing as well. You looked down shyly when he took your hands from your lap and stared at you with an earnest yet tender gaze.

“If it’s possible, I want to go out with you.”

You opened your mouth to accept him when reality crashed in. Gon was a skilled Hunter, and quite a popular one at that. That meant he wouldn’t be able to hang around for long. It didn’t count the other times when he’d disappeared to God knows where, too. You liked him, sure, but you didn’t think you could handle a long-distance relationship. And you feared that you would be a liability to him, because who knows how many enemies did he have? They could use you against him, and the last thing you wanted was to be a burden.

“I’m sorry, Gon. I don’t think I can,” you whispered, smiling ruefully. Like rejecting him was the same as rejecting yourself from having an opportunity to accompany him. And that was true, in some way. You rejected your best friend, and you couldn’t bear to see the pain in his eyes. Those brown, wide eyes that you often got lost into. Those brown, wide eyes that let you see the purity of his soul.

“What? Why not? I thought... I thought you liked me too.” He frowned and glanced down the floor. You got a feeling that his expression leaned more into confusion than surprise. As if he’d thrown off guard that you didn’t reciprocate his love like he’d expected to. As if he couldn’t wrap his brain to the fact that you didn’t accept his heartfelt confession. As if he somehow knew that you’d long liked him romantically despite his obliviousness.

“I do. I do like you, Gon. It’s just... complicated, okay? You can’t stay here for too long, and I’m not prepared for a long-distance relationship.” You squeezed his hands in an attempt to comfort him through the heartbreak that you’d created by yourself. “I’m sorry, Gon. I hope you understand that a long-distance relationship isn’t as easy as in movies.”

Gon slowly released his grasp on you and dropped his head. You bit your bottom lip, already missing the warmth. But you didn’t deserve it, did you? Because you rejected him, and you didn’t have a right to do lovey-dovey things with him. Things that you’d love to do to him.

Was it the right choice? Perhaps, you should think it over again. Perhaps, you should take it back and let him show you just how amazing of a boyfriend he could – would – be. But it was too late for that, and there was no saving you from your looming doom that left from his lips.

“Is it because of him?” he inquired, shadow concealing his eyes. You looked up, confused about who was the person in question. “That guy... Your ex.”

You furrowed your brows, wondering how he could come to that conclusion. After all, you’d explicitly stated that you weren’t ready to date him. “Um, Gon, you know that I’ve broken up with him.” you tittered.

“But you still harbor feelings for him, aren’t you? I knew that much; I could see it from your eyes. The way you always shot him a lingering glance, the way you always sighing when you thought I didn’t hear. I heard it, you know? You still love him, and I hate it.” He clenched his fists so tightly the knuckles turned whitish. For a split second, you pondered what would happen if you keep holding them. What could've happened to your hands had he didn't release them? “I hate that I still can’t make you look at me. Just for once, I want you to look at me the way you look at him. But it’s still not enough, is it? It will never be enough. Not unless I have you, not unless I ask you to. Because you’re nice like that.”

“Gon, w-what are you talking about?” you stuttered as you slowly backed away from his darkening aura. “I... I don’t understand.”

“Be mine.”

A bead of sweat fell from your temple as you blinked in confusion and fear. “Huh...?”

Gon snapped his head towards you, frowning in such a way to let you know that he would take none of your bullshit. It was so intense; he might as well be glowering at this moment. “Be mine, or else he’ll die.”

Your jaw dropped almost comically, unable to process the meaning of his words. Of his threat. Because there was just no way that he had just threatened you, right? No, you refused to believe it. Your sweet best friend didn’t threaten you. He couldn’t possibly find it in himself to speak such... such malicious thing. To you, out of all people.

“I... Gon, you can’t do that. That’s... that’s just wrong.” you explained slowly like a mother teaching her son that killing is bad. Killing is a crime and you didn’t want to see him behind the bars. Or worse. You shuddered at the thought.

“I can and I will. You know that, [Name].”

Yes, you did know. You knew more than anyone that Gon would stop at nothing to achieve something; to prove something. You just... didn’t expect him to stoop this low.

Well, it wasn’t as though you knew everything about him, anyway. Because if you did, then you would surely notice his constant glare towards your ex and how overly sweet he was being to you. It was sincere, though, as painful to admit it.

He grabbed your hands and force you to look at him in the eye. To look at the warmth that slowly disappeared from his eyes, revealing a pair of hardened pupils underneath. To feel the dogged determination from his grasp to never let you go. To make you realize the depth of his feelings and the severity of his threat.

“If you reject me again, then I won’t hesitate to kill him.”

This was all my fault, you thought to yourself as you listened to the sound of the front door opening and closing. To the rushed footfalls that approached your locked room. To the clicking of keys unlocking the door. To the strokes of his bloody hands – figuratively and literally – brushing against your cheeks. To the light, feathery kiss on your forehead.

“You have nothing to worry about,” he reassured you, ignoring how you pretended to be asleep in his presence and the silent tears that leaked through your fluttering eyelids. If he did notice, then he made no effort to call you out on it. He probably took it as a sign of you submitting to him. “We’re finally together now, and nobody will be able to separate us.”

However, he failed to realize that your main worry was and would always be him.

#Yandere gon #Yandere gon freecs #Yandere hxh #Yandere hunter x hunter #Yandere gon x reader #Yandere anime #Yandere imagine #Yandere scenario #Yandere one-shot #Gon x reader #Gon freecs x reader #Yandere gon freecs x reader

337 notes · View notes

capri-ramblings · 5 years ago

Text

Midnight Beasts, CNCO Imagines +Special Insert

This is a mess,but okay ♥️.

•Richard

He's been your best friend since childhood,and the two of you were inseparable. Wherever little red hood went,her wolf was close to follow.

He was no Big Bad Wolf though. Far from it,really.

He was always afraid of revealing his true self, especially with the person he vowed his loyalty to. In his eyes you were too good for him,too human. Whereas he saw himself as a monster, something to be put down.

"You'll hurt her" This keeps him on edge. Keeps him believing that maybe one day,he will hurt you. And then what? The thought had him baring his teeth and clenching his fists.

You've always wondered why he kept to himself sometimes,how in one minute he's hugging and laughing with you and in another he's built this wall between the two of you. He didn't seem as free as he was when you were both younger. There was a restraint you saw in him but could never manage to figure out. It was like trying to find him in a sea of people but constantly losing him instead. Each passing day,you felt him drift further away from you. You're conflicted; A part of you wants to confront him about it. "What's wrong with you?", "What's happening with us?", "Are you okay?",and then there's the other part, the softer, much less angrier part that's too afraid to force him out of a shell he isn't ready to leave yet.

"I don't want to hurt him" This thought has you staying up late at night,wrapped in a blanket that you wished were his arms instead.

•Erick

You've been in this old town too long to not have known what really ruled over it,or who rules over it. The local Werewolves here didn't even bother to hide it, but you hid the fact that you knew. Mostly because you weren't really interested in getting tangled up in all that drama, and because to be honest,you weren't really interested in them whatsoever. They were all too... Wolfy? If you had to describe it. They seemed to have no control over their Impulses or instincts, always needing to mark what they own and go around howling at night to warn people of their prowess.

They looked like humans but acted more like beasts than ever.

You weren't into the whole vibe of it, of course until the young pack of wolves showed up and butchered literally any prejudices you had for their species in one single clap. Unlike the ones you grew up with, these males knew what being in control was and they did it without being animals about it. There were five of them,all well-built and dominating in their own way, yet they worked perfectly well together. Almost like actual blood brothers. You remember meeting one of them at the grocers once, and how different it was to talk to him. How human and casual it felt.

The other packs hated them with some exceptions of smaller packs joining alliances with them.

If that wasn't enough, you couldn't keep your eyes off the youngest one.

"He's a lil too young for me" You tell your friend at the bar, and yet had your gaze fixated on him like a magnet. He sat at the table right across the room, surrounded by the other wolves. They were laughing and although he was too, he seemed as if he was in an entirely different zone than theirs. Gaze still and hooded, the dark themed club illuminated his forest green eyes like a temple, and when he glanced your way, lingering, you lost your breath and then your heart.

•Christopher

You could train a monkey and it would be more successful than trying to train your overly enthusiastic, optimistic and jokester nextdoor neighbor.

It wasn't that you disliked him, Chris was someone very easy and pleasant to be around. Almost everyone wanted to be his friend and have him cracking jokes at their parties,but you never had parties (never wanted to), you weren't always in the mood for jokes and sometimes having someone who always seemed ready to jump just at the mention of your name was a bit stressful. Still, you didn't hate him.

Unlike all those TV dramas and teen books that portrayed his kind as unstable and constantly on edge, Chris rarely ever lashed out on you or turned to his Werewolf nature. There were days you even doubted that he was one until you almost got mugged once and he lunged in to help you; The happy-go-lucky demeanor he carried gone as he stood in front of you and bared his teeth,eyes bright and gleaming with the intent to kill. You could never get that Image out of your head, but you trusted him, so the fear vanished quickly.

If only the annoyance did as well. *sigh*

He doesn't leave you to your space at all, you don't even think he understands the meaning of personal space. The books and series got one thing right at least; He was protective.

"Jesus Christ,I can walk home perfectly well alone."

"But mi amor, what if someone jumps out from a bush and hurts you?"

"I think someone else is going to get hurt if they don't leave me alone"

•Zabdiel

When you first see him, he has his lips on another woman's. Hands gripping a waist that would break so easily in his grasp as she leans in against him.

His eyes peaking through dark lashes as heavy as the focus dwelling in those deep set of brooding brown gaze.

You watch him and notice how he looks at you as if the woman he held didn't exist.

A voice. A name. Your friend is calling out to you, you turns around,head slightly dizzy as if you've already started drinking.

That night, nothing was as loud as the sound of your pulse beating in your ears each time your mind went back to him.

He's aloof, or seems to be at first, when you meet again it's because your friend was a friend of his and decided to drag you along to hangout. A part of you flinched at the sight of him,this odd sense of intimidation holding your head down, while the other part had you feeling giddy, too excited to say you weren't at least attracted to him. You kept your distance however,never letting your friend leave you alone whether or not he was near. The thought of being around him for too long and without any kind of support seemed all too dangerous.

But,you couldn't keep yourself from stealing glances his way, couldn't help but wonder if he remembers you.

His friends were so friendly, attentively listening and making you feel at ease, all the while he sat on the sofa with his legs parted, and arms stretched across the sofa's headrest. He smiled once in a while, let out a little laugh out of courtesy, but you didn't feel like he was really letting you in. It was more like he placed a mirror in front of it all and leaned against it for the illusion of being friendly.

Now you saw him as an overly powering male with no actual interest in anything other than his ego and image, and you were pissed.

"I think I'm gonna head home first" You tell your friend as you stood up and grabbed your things.

"It's still early tho—"

"I've got somewhere else to go"

You didn't let her say anything else as you bristled pass her, head held high and temper fuming. You weren't entirely sure why but you know he could've at least acted like he was interested just a little bit more, and not as if he was doing it because his friends told him to. As if you didn't exist in his radar at all.

Caught up in your frustration, you barely noticed the male tailing behind you and only realized it a bit too late when you went to open the door but it closed right in front of you instead.

"What?" You swirl around ready to lash out, yet unprepared for the intense gaze that immediately froze you in place.

Zabdiel loomed over you like the sky, expression unreadable.

Your breath hitched, words lost.

He looks you over,eyes deliberately drinking in your form before it shifts to your lips and then straight to your eyes.

He leans in,your eyes shut close.

Then a voice; "There's pizza in the fridge, we're gonna heat it up later. You should stay."

•Joel

"You don't get it" Joel throws his hands in the air, frustration glistening in the brown of his eyes,and you watch as he paces from the sofa to the kitchen counter like an upset child.

"Joelito, you're a werewolf not a three headed donkey,stop stressing"

"How does that make me stop stressing?" He glares at you, eyes narrowed "You're bad at this,I should've went to Ricky instead."

You thought Christopher was a handful but being in charge with a werewolf like Joel was like Hell's kitchen. Anything could be set on fire, and all because he makes it sound like everything was flammable.

Out of all the five, Joel was the one most worried about being what he was. Or at least he acted like the world was constantly ending because of it.

He needed to keep up his image,had to make sure it wasn't obvious he wasn't entirely human. He fussed over every tiny detail. It was overbearing, but you knew he meant well by it. He cared,not only about himself but about the other guys too. He knew how risky it was if people found out,knew what each guy was putting on the line. He couldn't afford to let it slip.

He was grateful you're constantly by his side,he's not going to admit it (even when everyone else already knows) but he's had a crush on you for a long time,and despite it all, he found confiding in you the most comforting thing ever. He could tell you all his secrets and doubts,and not worry about being put down. You understood him, and even when you didn't you always try to understand. You kept him grounded, and he'd risk his life to keep you safe.

•Yashua

He's the one in the gang that doesn't seem to fit like a puzzle piece but brings a whole new charm to it regardless. The loner and at the same time the one who has his Pack's back anytime.

People gather around him, laughing, enjoying themselves, and he always finds a way to loosen up anyone who isn't having fun.

And yet, as you learn to take time and really observe him, you've come to realize how there's this impenetrable wall around him. You notice the little things he does,how he stays quiet and watches any newcomers before really going out there and interact. As if every move he makes has already been calculated.

It took you a whole day to have him actually say something to you, and that was after everything had died down and people were getting ready to head home, he was friendly though. When he told you to take care and stay safe on your way back, you heard the genuineness in his voice and warmth in the way his lips curved into a small smile.

It was funny,but after seeing that you couldn't help but to smile yourself all the way home.

He was charming, and it showed in the way people's eyes lit up when he made jokes and fooled around. He dresses and sometimes acts like he's one of the young pups but you got the feeling it was a cover up. He wasn't as reckless as the younger wolves you knew, and he wasn't dumb either. It showed in the way his gaze would sharpen and dim just a bit whenever a situation happens,as if he's studying it all with a keen eye and an ever keener mind.

The way his body asserts his dominance is loud but the way he keeps to the back of the group during outings and chills around with the older members makes him seem quiet, intense even.

But then again,there's days when he's the loudest of them all, not bothering to hide the fact that he could out alpha anyone present.

He was something hard to decipher, someone not so one layered. Maybe that's why you find yourself falling.

@whymyeyeslikethat @cnco-hq

#cnco #cnco headcanon #cncowners #cnco imagine #cnco richard #cnco erick #cnco joel #cnco zabdiel #cnco christopher #yashua #yashua camacho #Werewolf Au #cnco au #romance

56 notes · View notes

astudyinchocolate · 6 years ago

Text

A new Spear of Selene theory: interns and Bulb Tech

There are 2 big questions left unanswered about the Spear of Selene: why Della took it, and why no one on Earth was able to receive her communication or find her once she’d crashed.

This is a 2-part theory about the second question.

Della clearly has a pre-existing, antagonistic relationship with Gyro. They know each other well enough that he throws jabs at her in the rocket’s manual, specifically that building it is “so easy even SHE could do it,” implying Della to be on a particularly low level of intelligence in Gyro’s eyes. It’s an insult that makes Della so furious that she tears the manual to pieces.

@gordon-quid has a theory about this: Della was Gyro’s intern. We know that Gyro has an ongoing rotation of lab interns. What if that were the case 11 years ago as well? Read on to learn how this affects Della’s communication to Earth too...

Della’s smart and likes science. Maybe she works with Gyro to help build cool, useful gadgets for adventures. She can even figure out rocket science with enough focus, determination, and time. Maybe she helps with bigger projects too. But if Della had access to Gyro’s lab, it would make it a hell of a lot easier for her to discover the secret Spear of Selene project. (not that she couldn’t discover it anyway, but this would make it even easier and provide a logical explanation for her discovery).

Even if she weren’t his official intern, maybe she just stops by to help with projects sometimes. Gyro’s not great at lying, so she might have figured out what was going on. Also, the Spear has a key for the ignition. Where would Della have found the key if not through Gyro’s lab? Plus, if the Spear was meant to be a surprise, it’s doubtful Scrooge or Gyro would have space suits lying around, easily visible. That would tip Della off to it immediately.

If Della were Gyro’s intern and he felt he was too lenient on her, perhaps that could explain why Gyro is so hard on Fenton and Manny, and generally why he adopts a very harsh and snarky demeanor with most people. Frank even hinted at Gyro having been nicer in the past, but for some reason his behavior changed. Could the Spear be the reason for the change? Donald dealt with it by leaving and diving headfirst into raising the boys; Scrooge dealt with it by emotionally walling himself off from the world; Gyro may have dealt with it by becoming a sarcastic jerk.

Gyro, while his opinions of Della are still unknown, seems to hold her to no higher level of esteem than he does Fenton, or anyone else for that matter. Della in S2E7 remarks that the gum “mocks her with every chew” and that seems especially telling. It’s an interesting word choice that may show how Gyro typically spoke to Della.

You know who would pick up on Gyro’s antagonism toward Della?

Lil’ Bulb.

And that’s where my part of the theory comes in.

Lil’ Bulb is presented as new in the Great Dime Chase, but Bulb Tech seems to be ongoing tech. And Gyro has a history of his tech turning sentient and evil. It’s very possible that early Bulb Tech was involved in the Spear incident. Or, really, any other tech of Gyro’s. Because it all turns sentient and evil. I’m going to keep calling it Bulb for simplicity’s sake, but any new, as-yet-unknown tech could also display the same characteristics and act the way I describe.

We’ve seen that Lil’ Bulb is fiercely loyal to Gyro and does not take insults well. Della is the kind of person who would joke around and insult someone without even realizing the impact of her words. If she’s insulting Gyro or even Bulb, she could make Bulb pretty angry.

Perhaps even angry enough to sabotage rescue efforts.

So far, the fandom’s focus has been on the buzzards in this scene. But lightbulbs are on the Spear’s communication panel with Scrooge. We don’t even see Gyro in Scrooge’s flashback, but we do see bulbs. Whether these are connected to Bulb Tech or not, we don’t know. They’re attached to the panel. The Spear is definitely Gold Tech, comms panel is possibly Bulb Tech. But again, remember that Gyro designed everything, so any part of this tech could turn sentient and evil. Bulb Tech or not.

The bulbs in the wide shot look like quick, sketchy, simple bulbs. But for the close-up shot, the artists chose to use ones that are specifically Gyro’s design. Even when Gyro uses “regular” light bulbs and not Bulb Tech, the bulbs are the same design.

Lil’ Bulb in counting machine:

Normal, non-Gyro bulb that Lil’ Bulb replaced in the counting machine. So we KNOW that “normal” bulbs exist in the Duck universe! The design for the Spear’s communication system is an intentional choice:

To stop the wild counting machine, Gyro takes out Lil’ Bulb and replaces it with another light bulb he pulls out of his pocket. All goes back to normal, and the bulb/machine is no longer taking orders or apparently sentient. That said, this is clearly the design Gyro uses for his bulbs specifically. So the Spear’s comms system was clearly built by him, and the bulbs are perhaps an intentional choice. A reminder that his tech often turns evil.

Gyro built the Spear and presumably helped design and build the subsequent fleet of ships. He had to be involved in rescue efforts. And probably Bulb was as well. We’ve seen Bulb in action. Bulb is smart. And so maybe Bulb changed radio signals, cut cords, and did whatever was necessary to please Gyro. It’s fanon (and probably canon) that Gyro was happier and more optimistic before the Spear. And he’s good at his core; as much as Della annoys him, he wouldn’t want her to die. So he’s probably distraught at this whole situation, and maybe he isn’t picking up on all the details of the rescue effort he normally would. And they need all hands on deck for their rescue work, including Bulb hands. Gyro is trusting Bulb to get work done and to do it honestly. Maybe this is even all before Gyro’s first Bulb Tech went evil, and this was the first instance of an invention turning sentient and evil.

Think about it: Gyro has access to communications, the ship, and the entire system. Bulb could very easily delete video recordings, cut off certain radio signals, etc. Bulb could prevent anyone from knowing Della was alive. All to presumably please Gyro. If Della was Gyro’s intern, perhaps Bulb felt competitive with Della and wanted to beat her. Gyro seems to like pitting interns against each other, and sending her into space forever does mean Bulb wins.

But again, even if Della weren’t Gyro’s intern and was just a random visitor, Bulb might still want to make Gyro happy by getting rid of the person he despises. It’s all about pleasing its master, Gyro.

I also wouldn’t rule out Bulb secretly working with the buzzards. The buzzards are shady af and might definitely enlist/hire someone or something to interfere with the search efforts. But right now.... I’m looking at you, Bulb. And I’m wondering just why you are on that communication panel.

also I have no idea what to make of Scrooge’s Spear photo being on the Spear itself… this crew doesn’t make mistakes and I can’t think of a logical explanation for it.

#spear of selene #dt theories #ducktales theories #ducktales #gyro gearloose #my posts

63 notes · View notes

ohmytheon · 7 years ago

Text

transluscent -

summary: (Psycho Pass AU) Despite being an Inspector in the CID, Uraraka's psycho pass score has always remained low and consistent, but when a bank robbery goes terribly wrong, she must decide if one of her most volatile Enforcers, Bakugou, is worth saving.

notes: This was originally supposed to be for a zine, but, as you can tell by the word count, it got a little too big. I've got a few more ideas for this AU that I couldn't fit in this one-shot. Not sure if I'll write them or not, but it's a possibility. It's been a while since I've watched Psycho Pass, but it's one of my favorite animes of all time. (That includes the second season.) I wrote this entirely doing sprints, which is wild, but it did help me finish this in like two or three days. At least one of the roles in here will be surprising, but I've got a lot of headcanons already for this AU. I hope you enjoy the ride!

Uraraka had never been one to believe that she was a better person simply because her Psycho Pass score was better than others. She’d always had a remarkably clear hue, even at a young age. Despite every day stressors that couldn’t be avoided and the harsh realities that life dealt her sometimes, her hue remained a beautiful light pink. As her friends struggled and their scores slowly ticked up as time went on, she stayed so neutral that even her teachers noted how unusual it was. Even if she did show outward signs of stress, her hue rarely ever changed.

She credited this success to her parents, who had taught her to remain optimistic in the face of difficulties. Despite her father’s business floundering from time-to-time and struggling financially throughout her childhood, their scores stayed safely below the latent criminal level to keep them out of trouble. She wanted to be just like them, a model citizen, but also something more. Watching her friends and family struggle to keep in line even over the simplest things made her realize that she was meant for something greater than following in her father’s steps.

If she had a talent in keeping her score low, then she should use that ability for the greater good.

Before she’d even graduated, Uraraka had known that she wanted to join the CID. She wanted to save people. Growing up, she had spent a lot of time watching movies about heroes that saved the day. Yes, it was romanticized, but she couldn’t get over the idea. Many people weren’t as lucky as her. She had watched as classmates were taken away in the middle of exams, marked as latent criminals, never to be seen again. No one questioned it, but she couldn’t help but feel that there was something else that she could do.

Even worse, there were victims of crimes that ended up with hues too clouded to be fixed. If there was a chance that she could save people from not only criminals but themselves, then it was her responsibility to do that. She’d learned early on that her crime coefficient rarely wavered. After being bullied relentlessly for her thrift shop clothes, the school’s counselor had been concerned about her. She’d kept the situation a secret for a year so that no one would get in trouble. Allowing that kind of stress to fester was dangerous. However, when she was scanned by the Sybil System, they had found that her score had only gone up a single point. The counselor had been shocked.

Less than a year later, her bully was pulled out of the school, marked as a latent criminal at a mere eleven years of age. Uraraka wondered to this day if she could’ve helped him. Maybe, if she’d said something earlier about the bullying, he would’ve been able to get the therapy that he’d needed to keep his score down. By keeping quiet, she’d inadvertently hurt him as well. The school counselor had told her that it wasn’t her fault, but for the first time she had felt the sense that she could’ve done something.

Joining the CID had shocked her friends and scared her parents. Uraraka knew what she looked like. She was a short young woman with brown hair that framed her round face and rosy cheeks and a soft body that looked like it was meant more for cuddling than chasing down criminals. She smiled a lot, laughed at bad jokes, and had a cheery disposition that was not common in the CID. Her top grades allowed her to apply, but she had no doubt that it was her exceptional Psycho Pass score that had got her the job as an Inspector. That relatively flat line would impress anyone, even the Enforcers positioned beneath her on Division 2.

It didn’t impress everyone though.

Uraraka kicked the door to their office open, a large case file in one hand, a tray with four coffees in the other, and a bag filled with breakfast pastries caught between her teeth. Her brow was furrowed in a concentrated expression as she nudged her way inside and then carefully made her way over to her desk. First, she set down the precarious hot coffees, then took the bag out of her mouth, before finally setting the file down and sighing in relief. When she turned around, however, she was met with the barrel of a Dominator pointed at her and she nearly jumped out of her socks.

“Bakugou!” Inspector Iida reproached as he stepped into the room. “You do not point your Dominator at an Inspector!”

The Enforcer in question raised an eyebrow, but didn’t lower the gun, his eyes glowing a bright blue as the Sybil System assessed whether she was a criminal or not. With the initial shock over, Uraraka relaxed and leaned back against her desk. Iida opened his mouth to further reprimand him, but she held up a hand to stop him. The Dominator posed no threat to her. Not only was her score well below the latent criminal level, but Enforcers couldn’t use the guns against Inspectors. It was little more than a scanner in Bakugou’s hands when put against her. When the Dominator finally finished its judgment, he lowered the gun and his eyebrow.

“Satisfied?” Uraraka asked with perhaps a touch of sass.

Katsuki Bakugou certainly didn’t look it, judging from the light scowl on his face. “Just checking.”

“You say that every time you assess me,” Uraraka pointed out, folding her arms across her chest.

Iida stormed over and snatched the weapon out of Bakugou’s hands. “You shouldn’t even have this outside of storage. I should check your crime coefficient. You know that if it gets too high–”

“I know, Four Eyes, I know,” Bakugou interrupted. “You’ll be forced to shoot me and I’ll explode on everyone.”

Unlike most people when faced with that thought, he didn’t look bothered in the slightest. Uraraka honestly didn’t know much about him. Despite being the loudest (and admittedly most dangerous) one on the team, Bakugou wasn’t an open book. He didn’t talk about his past or how he had come to be an Enforcer. Most of the others on the team and in other divisions assumed that he’d been labeled a latent criminal when he was a kid, considering his crass and careless behavior. It was like he’d never bothered trying to conform to society or he’d simply turned his back on it.

Iida had once told her that Bakugou had one of the highest crime coefficients in the CID. Considering that his mere presence had a habit of raising the Area Stress Level,h he was a constant threat to be watched, not to mention his ability to raise the scores of the Inspectors that were entrusted with keeping him in line. Iida was one of the few who was capable of handling him without his hue becoming too clouded. Other Inspectors had not been so lucky, including one that was now an Enforcer alongside him on Division 2.

Izuku Midoriya had reassured her that it was not Bakugou’s fault that he had fallen from Inspector to Enforcer. His own Psycho Pass score was just above the 100 mark that labeled him as a latent criminal. She couldn’t see how with his baby face, freckles, and bright demeanor, but sure enough, when he’d suggested she check him, she had been shocked to find his score at 105. Once past that mark, even if it went back under the safe level, he could never go back to being an Inspector.

“Try and at least act like you care about how your actions affect those around you,” Iida said as he put the Dominator back in its storage case.

“I dunno,” Enforcer Kaminari quipped as he spun around in his seat in front of his computer. “I think it’d be kinda funny. Then he really would be King Explodo.”

Bakugou reared on him. “How about next time I aim it at your face?”

Midoriya frantically waved his hands in the air, a nervous smile on his face. “Hey, let’s all calm down! It’s early and it’s been a good week. Let’s keep up the solid work!”

“Don’t tell me what to do, Deku!” Bakugou snapped.

Uraraka rolled her eyes, but a fond smile slipped onto her face as she unfolded her arms and turned back around to her desk. Most people wouldn’t think that a job in the CID was something that could be enjoyed – and she would be the first to admit that it was incredibly hard – but after six months of working on this team with no losses, she could honestly say that it felt a lot like home. These people were her family. Besides Iida, they would never be allowed the same freedom that she experienced, but they risked their lives daily to ensure that other people could.

How could she not respect them for that? Although they had already been marked as defunct members of society, they still served and protected it. Even Bakugou with his crude remarks, volatile nature, and general dismissiveness threw himself in the line of fire. They didn’t just risk getting injured or killed on the job. There was always that looming threat of their crime coefficient getting too high or their hue too dark. If that were to happen, it was up to Iida and Uraraka to put them down.

This job was known for ruining people’s psycho passes. She attended regular therapy sessions to ensure that it didn’t happen to her, although her therapist was always surprised to find her score still low. The Enforcers did this job under the threat of death to protect a society that no longer wanted anything to do with them. They had all defended and protected her, be it against other criminals or other division members that didn’t believe she was capable of her job. She believed that there was goodness in them.

“No one in the CID should be capable of having a score that low or hue so clear,” Bakugou grumbled under his breath as he dropped into his seat. “It’s unnatural.”

Uraraka stepped past him to hand Kaminari a coffee and snack. “It’s always been like that. I couldn’t tell you why.”

“It’s because you’re the sweetest person ever,” Kaminari said before chugging half the coffee in one go and taking a massive bite out of the doughnut. He wasn’t necessarily the brightest bulb on their team, but he was a whiz with technology and had a go-getter attitude that made people laugh. His voice was muffled and barely understandable, but she thought he added something like, “You are a gift.”

Bakugou snapped, “Don’t act like an animal,” and reached out to smack him, but Kaminari rolled out of the way, cackling with a mouthful of food.

“Oh, you remembered my favorite flavor!” Mina gushed as she took her treat from Uraraka.

Of course she had. She also knew all of their birthdays. Most Inspectors didn’t get familiar with their Enforcers, choosing to treat them more like attack dogs that they owned. Honestly, it disgusted her. These were people. Just because they were labeled as criminals didn’t mean that they were animals. If any one of them were to die on the job, it would devastate her. She’d joked with them, worked with them, risked her life with them, had dinner with them… It was important to know that they deserved to live just as much as her. Otherwise, what were they doing?

Midoriya quietly thanked her, retreating back to the safety of his desk, and then she handed the last coffee and treat to Iida. They took turns getting breakfast twice a week for everyone. It was an easy way to get to know everyone. He had appreciated her initiative when she came up with the idea. Apparently his partner in between Midoriya and her had not been so friendly or warm. He’d escaped with his score still intact, but had requested a transfer after nearly coming to blows with Bakugou.

“Hey, where the hell is mine?” Bakugou demanded.

“You’ll get one when you start being nice,” Uraraka chirped teasingly before she sat down.

Kaminari and Mina laughed. Midoriya wisely stayed quiet behind his computer, although he was smiling. Meanwhile, Bakugou seethed and mumbled some choice words under his breath loud enough for her to hear. It only made her snort. He had such a colorful language. She wondered if he’d talked like this before his score had gone up or if he’d given himself the leeway to do so only after. Foul language did affect some people’s hue.

A ringing sound interrupted the light-hearted air in the room, the tension immediately thickening. Iida pulled up the message on his screen and quickly read it over. The frown on his suddenly pale face told her that it was bad. Even the others noticed. Kaminari sunk in his seat while Bakugou wiped his face clean.

“A bank robbery in process,” Iida notified them, not looking away from the screen. “Five confirmed dead, at least sixteen hostages, four known criminals. There’s threat of a bomb as well.”

Bakugou jumped to his feet. “Finally, some fucking action.”

“This isn’t a good thing,” Midoriya pointed out.

Everyone prepared to head out as Iida gave them further instructions and details. Uraraka watched the Enforcers carefully as they walked out of the office. It had been a quiet week, as Midoriya had said earlier, but it appeared as if their peace had finally been disrupted. She waited for her team to file into the back of the transport vehicle before slipping into the passenger side of Iida’s car. She hated the way they had to move Enforcers, but that was how it had always been done.

“Uraraka.”

She turned to Iida, who looked more tense than normal. It had concerned her at first, thinking of how uptight Iida always seemed to be, until she’d realized that was just his nature. This time felt different. His knuckles were white on the steering wheel and his jaw was clenched, the muscles in his face and neck looking tight. Although his eyes were focused on the road ahead, they were distant as well, like his mind was elsewhere.

“Keep a close eye on Bakugou,” Iida told her, startling her out of her thoughts.

“I always watch my Enforcers carefully,” Uraraka replied, not liking the direction of this conversation.

For his part, Iida didn’t seem to either. “His crime coefficient levels have taken a sharp turn in the past month. If you have to turn your Dominator on him at any point, I’m afraid the outcome of Sybil’s judgment might not be so kind.”

A shadow fell over Uraraka’s face. As an Inspector, she had been forced to turn her weapon a twice on her subordinates. She’d done it once on Bakugou so that he wouldn’t eliminate a victim that had been deemed beyond saving. The other time had been surprisingly on Midoriya, who had gotten into it viciously with a criminal. Both times she had been lucky in that they had only been paralyzed, but it could’ve been much worse. Midoriya had apologized, deeply embarrassed by his behavior. Bakugou had not, even though she had apologized to him.

“You did what you judged you had to do,” Bakugou had scoffed. “It’s your job, not mine, to decide what to do with me.”

Uraraka hadn’t known what to do with that. She still didn’t. Here they were now, months later, and Iida was telling her to watch him – or maybe watch her own back. Bakugou couldn’t hurt her with a Dominator, but he was taller than her, broader and more muscular. She knew how to fight, but she’d seen firsthand how brutal he could be. Enforcers were criminals. The worst of the bunch deemed good enough to be put to work so that Inspectors didn’t cloud their hue. They were, essentially, sacrificial pawns at the end of the day.

Not to her. Each and every one of them meant something to her, even Bakugou.

“He’ll be fine,” Uraraka reassured her partner, turning her eyes to the road.

Iida took a deep breath and relaxed his shoulders. “His score had started to level itself. I don’t know what changed. I went back through our cases, but didn’t find any outliers. Maybe it’s just the stress of the job.”

It wasn’t a funny situation, but Uraraka still chuckled, albeit somewhat mirthlessly. “I don’t think this job stresses him out. If anything, it’s a way for him to blow off steam. Without it, I don’t know what he’d do.”

“I’d rather not find out,” Iida mumbled. He shook his head, getting rid of any lingering nasty thoughts. “Either way, I want you to be vigilant. If anything goes wrong, I don’t want the others getting dragged into it.” He peered at her out of the corner of his eyes right as she glanced back at him. “Bakugou is focused on you. I’d watch that as well. You wouldn’t be the first Inspector he’s brought down and not the last.”

“If he’s such a threat to Inspectors, then why is he still an Enforcer?” Uraraka asked curiously. Good Inspectors were hard enough to come by. This was not a job that many people sought out. It was dangerous for multiple reasons, death and getting rejected by society only two of them.

Iida didn’t hesitate for a moment when he answered very seriously, “Because he’s too good at his job. He’s the best Enforcer the CID has.”

The conversation ended after that. The blockade surrounding the bank could be seen in the distance, returning the tension in the car. Behind them was the police vehicle that contained their Enforcers. She couldn’t help but think of Bakugou’s narrowed, distrusting eyes as he’d lowered the Dominator from her. Had he been like this with the other Inspectors that had either left or fallen to the wayside? Was it just her that he was so aggressive with? Iida had told her to keep an eye on him, but he hadn’t needed to say anything. She already did.

Once in front of the bank, she stepped out of the car and they got ready to work. While their team picked out their Dominators, Iida explained the situation in further detail with the hologram information that the Sybil System had been able to give him and they created a plan. As usual, the Enforcers took the brunt of the work and put themselves on the line the most. It was their job to hunt and take down the bad guys. The Inspectors made sure that they did that job and didn’t go overboard in the process. A person’s crime coefficient was more likely to raise the higher it was.

“Hey,” Uraraka said right before Bakugou followed Midoriya around the back of the bank. He paused and glanced back at her, his Dominator held loosely in his hands before him. The look in his eyes was unreadable, but she got the sense that he was the one trying to read and pick her apart. She gave him a determined look. “Be careful.”

“Worried about me, Inspector?” Bakugou drawled.

Uraraka smiled, trying to put more strength in it than she suddenly felt she had. “Should I be?”

Bakugou didn’t answer her. His expression changed, if only for a moment, to something tangible that made her want to reach out to him and touch his face. She didn’t. It would’ve been highly inappropriate. There was something about that look that made her feel like something was missing. If he had been any other person, she would have given him physical comfort, but she couldn’t. He was an Enforcer; she was an Inspector. There was a carefully drawn line between them for a reason and it was to protect her. He knew that, which was perhaps why he turned away from her without responding and disappeared into the dark alley.

All Uraraka could do was stare after he’d gone and hope that things would be okay. She had to believe that they would. It was part of why her hue remained so clear. She believed in so many good things. Even when they were dashed away, she kept on believing. Nothing could shatter her.

How could she have been so foolish?

Maybe she should’ve taken Iida’s words more to heart. Maybe trusting her Enforcers or treating them like humans was a mistake. Maybe she wasn’t meant for this job. She was too compassionate, too bright, too hopeful. People like that weren’t meant to be Inspectors. Why should she have risked clouding her hue for people that had ignored their own? Maybe she really was stupid for believing that she could do something – that she could save people from themselves – that she could save those that had already gone to the dark.

She really was an idiot for believing that she could save someone as far gone as Bakugou.

It took less than twenty minutes for reality to come crashing down on her, ripping her hopes to shreds and leaving her standing in the wake of a horror she had never imagined. The bloodshed in the bank had been worse than they had realized, the criminals further gone than they’d thought. It hadn’t just been a bank robbery and a hostage situation. It had been a full-on meltdown. It happened sometimes when people were flagged by bots and told to get therapy or face being detained in a facility. Some people got help and some… Well, some tipped over completely and went on a rampage, feeling like they had nothing left to lose.

Uraraka found herself standing in the middle of the bank, her Dominator trembling in her hands as she stared at the scene before her. Half of the hostages had been killed. Kaminari sat in the corner with his back to the wall and a hand on his shoulder to keep his gunshot wound from bleeding all over the place, the goofy smile on his face replaced by a clammy complexion and grit teeth. Two of the bank robbers were dead, Bakugou’s and Midoriya’s Dominators having decided that they were too far gone to be kept alive. It broke Uraraka’s heart whenever that happened, even if they had done terrible things.

Movement in the corner of her peripheral vision caught Uraraka’s eye and she turned just in time to see a gun pointed at her. She dived to the side as a gunshot exploded and Kaminari screamed her name. It hit the wall behind her and she scrambled to take cover behind a large marble pillar. More gunshots pierced the air and she winced. Glancing around, she spotted Kaminari’s dropped Dominator in the middle of the floor and then caught eyes with him where he had hid underneath a table. Both of them were pinned in their positions.

“Hey, shitface!”

Uraraka’s heart skipped a beat upon recognizing Bakugou’s voice. She would’ve known it was him just by his choice of words. The sound of a Dominator letting loose a paralyzing shot resounded in the air, but there was only a grunt of pain that followed instead of a body collapsing. She moved around the pillar, trying to find a vantage point to take out the shooter when a hand grabbed her hair from behind and she was dragged from her hiding place. Before she could move to aim her weapon at her attacker, he ripped it from her hand and used the butt of it to whack her in the head. Stars and black spots burst into her vision and she tripped over her own feet as her mind struggled to stay aware.

When she came to her senses again, she found herself behind held hostage, the muzzle of an old school handgun pressed against her temple and one of her arms twisted painfully behind her back. Her attacker was much larger than her and reeked of sweat, likely either due to adrenaline or narcotics. A lot of people boosted before commiting a crime so that the Dominator paralyzers had less of a chance working on them.

Bakugou stood in front of her, pointing the Dominator in her direction as he had done an hour ago. There was a cold expression on his face, one that said he would get the job done no matter what, and a fire in his red eyes that made him look like the devil himself. Blood stained his jacket, the red liquid shining in the light of the sun peeking through the broken windows. He stood straight and tall, no hint of any injuries, insecurities, or fears. This was the job he was meant to do. He’d been born to be an Enforcer.

At least that was the air he gave off. She could tell by her captor’s shuffling feet and the way he tightened his grip on her and began to breathe heavily that he could feel the dangerous aura that Bakugou exuded.

“You can’t shoot me!” her captor shouted in a panic. “Not while I’ve got your Inspector!”

Bakugou eyes narrowed into slits. “I can’t believe you let yourself get captured.”

Was he actually directing his anger towards her in a moment like this? She would’ve told him off if not for the fact that she was concerned that any odd or sudden movement from her would trip the guy into pulling the trigger. However, her jaw dropped when she noticed Bakugou aim the Dominator a little lower and the telltale blue glow in his eyes. He was assessing her. She was being held captive and could potentially die and he was making sure her score was at an appropriate level.

Is he mad? Uraraka couldn’t help but wonder, even as her heart pounded in her chest. She cringed as the man lifted her arm up higher, forcing her to step on her tiptoes to relieve some of the pressure.

To be honest, when Bakugou frowned, Uraraka couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad thing. Had her score gone too high? Her mind flashed to all the victims of crimes whose hues had become too clouded, whose crime coefficients had become too high, whose Psycho Pass scores turned them from innocent civilian to a latent criminal in need of being exterminated. The one time she shot Bakugou came to mind. She couldn’t let him kill that woman, no matter what the Sybil System had said. She’d done nothing wrong. It wasn’t right.

Would he hesitate if it labeled her in such a way?

The Dominator didn’t activate. It had judged her innocent. Uraraka couldn’t sigh in relief when that meant that she was blocking his shot. He wouldn’t be able to get a decent read on the criminal holding her captive and slowly inching his way to the door that lead to the back. Where were Iida, Midoriya, and Mina? Had they found the bomb? Midoriya was probably the only one that had the knowledge to defuse it.

“I’m leaving!” the criminal declared, sounding more panicky than confident. “If anyone tries to follow me, I’ll kill her and blow this place sky high!”

Knowing that he couldn’t get a shot, Bakugou let the Dominator fall harmlessly to his side in one hand and it went into inactive mode. Then, he tilted his head in a curious manner. “You don’t have the detonator.” His tone was strange, off, but Uraraka had no time to process it before he pulled a handgun out of his pocket and fired off a shot.

Humiliating as it was, Uraraka screamed as the criminal’s blood splattered over her. She dropped to her knees when his grip on her loosened and he dropped to the floor. Her left ear was ringing and she pressed a palm against it in an attempt to stop the pain. When she pulled her hand away though, she found it covered in blood. It was sticky and warm and made her want to vomit. Slowly she turned her head in the direction of the criminal, soaking in the sight of his prone body as blood pooled around his head. There was a bullet hole right between his eyes.

Bakugou had shot and killed him with an actual gun, not a Dominator. He must have taken it from one of the downed bank robbers. Horror filled her to the brim until she felt like she was choking on it. He shouldn’t be anywhere near that. If anyone were to point a Dominator at him with that in his hand, it would determine to exterminate him on the spot. It would judge him too guilty to live. He would die. And for what? Because he’d decided to go outside the lines and pushed himself past the limit to save her?

He would be killed because he’d chosen to protect her over keeping his score low enough to protect himself.

“What’s going on?”

Uraraka whipped her head around as Iida came rushing back into the room with Midoriya and Mina at his heels. She saw Kaminari pushing himself back to his feet, using the wall as leverage. Bakugou glanced at her before he turned to face Iida and released the gun, letting it drop to the ground at his feet. Iida stared at him in disbelief, but it was the painful realization dawning on Midoriya’s face that tugged at her heart the most.

“Kacchan, what did you do?” Midoriya questioned in a hoarse whisper.

“I did what I had to do in order to protect my Inspector,” Bakugou answered without any guilt in his voice. He didn’t regret what he had done for a second. “That’s my job, isn’t it?”

Despite the obvious conflict raging in his mind, Iida lifted his Dominator and pointed it at Bakugou. No one could hear what the Sybil System told him through the weapon except for him, but they didn’t need to in order to know what was going on. She watched as it changed from non-lethal to lethal mode, growing in size and glowing bright blue as it readied the chamber with a bullet that would destroy Bakugou from the inside out.

As an Inspector and a law-abiding citizen, Uraraka should have stood by and watched as judgment was passed down. It was not up to them to decide who lived and died. That was what made their society so good. They dealt with the worst of the worst, but for the most part, even petty crimes barely existed anymore. Most people lived in peace because people like Bakugou died.

But she couldn’t do it. Uraraka knew that her score couldn’t be as low as it was if she wasn’t the type of person that truly believed she could save people and that good would triumph.

Jumping to her feet, she ran without thinking and jumped in front of Bakugou, throwing her arms out and shielding him with her body as best as she could. “Stop! Don’t shoot!” She was smaller than him, not someone built to give another person cover, but she tried to make herself bigger as she protected him.

Bakugou grunted in shock behind her and grabbed her by the waist. “Uraraka, move!”

“Get out of the way!” Iida demanded, the gun not wavering.

“Iida, don’t shoot,” Uraraka repeated, panting heavily and digging her feet into the ground to push back on Bakugou’s grip. She couldn’t move. She wouldn’t.

“The Dominator–” And damnit if Bakugou didn’t choke on the words. For the first time, she heard something different in his voice. It wasn’t arrogance, contempt, dismissal, or rage. It was fear. He was staring down the barrel of a gun that would deem him worth less than trash and he was afraid, but not for himself. He was afraid for her.

He’d checked her before and found her score to be sufficient, but that was before he had shot and killed a man just inches away from her. They had both seen people go from innocent to latent criminal after witnessing something like that, even worse when they were in the thick of it. People’s hues could get clouded simply by being around crime. It was why they had to evacuate buildings when the Stress Area Level became too high. She was covered in that man’s blood. It dripped from her jaw onto the floor, her hair sticky with it. She must have looked awful.

If the Sybil System judged her score to be too high – if it decided that her arguing against Iida’s orders and doing something out of the ordinary by protecting Bakugou warranted a rise in her crime coefficient – then Iida would be forced to put her down like the rest of them. Maybe it would only be a paralyzer, but then she would be in the same position as Midoriya, a once-promising Inspector turned into a disgraced Enforcer. She had to risk it. She had to do something more with what she’d been given.

A shocked and relieved expression flooded Iida’s face as the Dominator backed down, returning to its inactive state. Only then did Uraraka drop her arms. She was safe. She was fine. She had been judged and she was innocent. It was the first time she had ever worried about herself. Closing her eyes, she gulped down a deep, shuddering breath and then let all the tension bleed out of her body. They weren’t out of the woods yet. Her score was clean, but behind her, Bakugou’s was not.

“The system passed its judgment,” Iida told her quietly.

“I don’t care,” Uraraka ground out. “Let me… Just give me a moment, please. I can fix this.”

“You can’t,” Iida said.

Bakugou still hadn’t let go of her. If anything, his grip on her waist tightened. “It’s done.”

“No!” Uraraka spun around to face him, his hand sliding over her stomach but not moving from its place. She took a step closer, invading his space, and she watched him suck in a gasp of air. There was fire in his eyes, but it was different from before. It was alive. It was wanting. He shouldn’t be touching her. He knew that. Keeping his hand on her now was overstepping every boundary written in the guidelines. She should’ve pushed him away, but instead she pulled him in closer.

“The judgment is final for us, Uraraka,” Bakugou said, his voice raspy and low. “You can’t change it. I’m not good like you.”

Taking a deep breath, she did what she had wanted to do earlier and lifted a hand to lay it on his cheek. At first, he tensed up and she thought he might pull away, but then he leaned into it and closed his eyes, practically reveling in her touch. If this didn’t work – if she couldn’t save him – then this would very likely be the last time he could enjoy any sort of human contact. It was unsupervised, unscripted, un-everything that made him an Enforcer. For a moment, he could be just a man and her a woman.

“What happened?” Uraraka asked. “What changed?”

“I don’t know.”

Uraraka narrowed her eyes. “Bullshit.”

A cold smile crossed Bakugou’s face and he opened his eyes. “Should’ve expected that. You’re perceptive as fuck.”

“Iida told me that your crime coefficient started rising a few months ago,” Uraraka continued, not giving him the time to skip over this or the ability to deflect. He could try all he wanted, but she would always pull him back to this. “That was around the time I shot you. Was it that? Was it something I did?”

“No, it wasn’t–” Bakugou cut himself off and stared down at her, a thousand unspoken words resting between them. He was all sharp edges and hard muscles, but there was something undeniably soft about the way he gazed at her now, despite his absurdly high score. She should step away from him. Let him be taken care of. Maybe it would be doing him a favor. How tired was he of being the CID’s favorite attack dog? “It was you, but not like you think.”

Uraraka pulled her hand away from his face and put both of them on her hips. “Explain it to me then.”

“Your Psycho Pass score rose,” Bakugou said, sounding terribly hurt. She tilted her head in confusion. “I’ve checked the score of every Inspector I’ve had during my time as an Enforcer, but not a single one has ever stayed level like yours. I didn’t understand it. Even when you were being held hostage and threatened, it stayed steady.”

She didn’t understand why it bothered him so much. Her score was bound to rise every once in a while, considering what she saw and went through with the job. “That’s not a bad thing, is it? I took this job because of that.”

“After you shot me,” Bakugou emphasized, “your score rose.” He shook his head. “I checked the records. It didn’t rise after you shot Deku. It didn’t rise during any of the investigations we did.” He waved a hand around the area. Her eyes skirted over the dark shapes that were unmistakably bodies. “Your score didn’t rise when you walked in and saw this! But it did when you shot me ?”

“I don’t know what you want me to tell you,” Uraraka replied quietly.

Bakugou put a hand to the side of his head and huffed an irritated breath. He apparently didn’t know either. “You can’t do that. Surely the others explained it to you.”

Uraraka blinked in confusion. “Do what?”

“Care about me!” Bakugou exploded, throwing his hand out. “About us!” He waved a hand to Midoriya and Mina, who were wearing a knowing expression and looking away respectively, and then to Kaminari, who dropped his gaze to the ground, one hand still on his shoulder. “We’re not like everyone else. We’re not good, Uraraka. We can smile, laugh, make jokes, cry, and get into arguments like every other asshole on this planet – but we live in a different world. You can’t just treat us like we’re equals.”

“Why not?” Uraraka put her hands on her hips. “You’re not animals. You’re still human. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been labeled as a latent criminals; that won’t stop you from having the same hopes, dreams, fears, and wants that every other human does. I’m not going to treat you like a dog. You’re more important to me than that.”

Bakugou practically seethed as he glared down at her and then licked his lips. “You don’t know what you’re saying. You should never have taken a job with the CID.”

It felt as if Bakugou had slapped her in the face. Her eyes widened in shock and she took a step back, the wall between them suddenly too palpable. “Why? Do you think I’m too weak?”

“You’re anything but weak,” Bakugou said, turning away from her slightly. A shadow fell over his face, one that he seemed to perpetually live in. “You’re just too good. You’ll only get corrupted down here. It’s not right. You deserve better than that. Some nice, cheery life with pleasant, good people. A nice house in the suburbs, a cute dog, the perfect boyfriend who cooks you breakfast and kisses you when you get home from your easy job. That’s what you deserve, not this nightmare of a shithole.”

That was it? All that fighting, scowling, and judgmental glares – and it was because he was being protective? She knew that he didn’t look at it that way, but that was what he was doing. He’d risked dying to save her, after all. He had known that her score would likely rise if she was taken by the criminal. Someone that desperate would’ve likely hurt her further or killed her altogether. He had known full well that the Sybil System would judge him as too much of a threat and he had done it anyways.

Uraraka poked him in the chest. “Did you ever stop to think that’s exactly why I chose this job? So that other people could have those lives that they deserve? So they don’t end up in your position or, even worse, his?”

She waved a hand in the direction of the man that Bakugou had killed. Behind her, she knew that Iida was avoiding it. Being in here too long could possibly cloud his hue. She heard Midoriya mumbling just that to him. It didn’t raise hers and Bakugou knew it, which seemed to irritate him further.

“If you stay in the CID…” Bakugou’s voice faded and he clenched his jaw.

“My score has been consistent my entire life. I don’t know why, but I came to the conclusion early on that I wanted to use that ability to help others, even those deemed too far gone, even you.” Uraraka allowed herself to soften. Most Inspectors would’ve called her a fool, maybe even Iida, but she stood before him completely vulnerable. She didn’t need her Dominator to know that he deserved to live. “You’re right. This job isn’t easy. It’s crushing and devastating. I spend some nights crying in bed. Silly, I know. I don’t want an easy job or some nice, pleasant, cheery life in the suburbs. I want other people to have that. That’s my dream.”

“Gods, you’re such a sap,” Bakugou grumbled.

A smile touched Uraraka. “You could’ve just said that you were worried about me instead of checking my score every day, you know.”

His eyes flickered to hers, but he didn’t say anything. He didn’t want her to know that he worried about her in any way. That would imply that he cared about her and he certainly couldn’t do that. He was an Enforcer. Yes it was his job to protect her, but care suggested that he might even be fond of her and that was too much. He wasn’t allowed that.

Iida cleared his throat. “Uraraka?”

“Midoriya, could you hand me my Dominator?” Uraraka asked calmly, holding out a hand but not looking away from Bakugou’s eyes. She could see a hint of fear in them now. For as flippant as he was about the whole thing every time Iida reprimanded him, he didn’t want to die, especially not after she had given him a taste of what he dreamed about. It could never happen. He could never give her what he thought she deserved, but right now – being on this team, doing her job, working with him at her side – she had what she wanted.

After a moment’s hesitation, Midoriya stepped through the carnage to retrieve her Dominator. The bots wouldn’t come in to clean up this disaster until the CID gave them the all-clear. One more thing had to be done before they could do that and get Kaminari to the hospital. She knew that Iida wouldn’t let Bakugou just walk out of here because she had shielded him. The judgment had still been made and it had to be passed. After carefully placing the gun in her hand, Midoriya stepped back out of the way. He wasn’t pleased with the decision either.

Uraraka stared into his eyes. “Do you trust me now?”

“You should let Iida do it,” Bakugou said instead, trying to erase all the emotions from his voice and failing entirely. He felt things too deeply. Perhaps that was why his score had risen to dangerous levels and he’d become an Enforcer. He let go of his Dominator and it clattered uselessly to the floor, the sound echoing in the quiet bank as everyone held their breaths. It wasn’t easy losing a colleague, even if they were a latent criminal, because it reminded the rest of them that they were ticking time bombs.

“Do you trust me?” Uraraka repeated, firmer this time.

Bakugou’s lips twitched into a frown. “You know I do. Assessing you daily was never about distrust or thinking that you were too fragile for the job.”

“Then trust me when I say that you aren’t going to die,” Uraraka told him.

“My score–”

“Is not who you are,” she cut in, even though she knew that he hated being interrupted. “You have a good heart, Bakugou. You’re not as far gone as you think. Let me help you.”

Even though he was hesitant to believe in himself, Uraraka had to hope that he would believe in her. She had to hope that he could be saved. It was why her score stayed down. When she had been forced to paralyze him with the Dominator, maybe that belief had wavered, hence why it had raised. Then again, why hadn’t it raised when she had shot Deku? Was it because of the circumstances?

Slowly, Uraraka raised the Dominator and pointed it at him. Her eyes glowed blue as the Sybil System began to analyze him. She wouldn’t kill him. She didn’t care what it decided. She’d throw the gun to the side and throw herself over him again if she had to in order to keep him alive. It wasn’t that he was the best at his job. He mattered to her. Latent criminal, subordinate, Enforcer – she wanted him to remain in her life. He’d become too important of a piece for her to simply let him go.

“The target’s threat judgment has been reappraised. Enforcement mode: not lethal – paralyzer.”

Tears sprang to her eyes as Bakugou laughed, tilting his head back and wearing what almost looked like a smile. “Ah, not this shit again. It hurts like a bitch.”

“Better than getting blown to bits,” Kaminari joked half-heartedly.

“Sorry,” Uraraka told him, but she only sort of meant him. He kind of deserved this after the stress that he’d put them all through and he knew it too. He dropped his chin and looked at her one last time, total acceptance openly shining in his eyes and on his face.

And then she pulled the trigger.

It didn’t matter if it was at point blank range. The paralyzer struck Bakugou in the chest, his body shaking as it worked on shutting his muscles down. When it finally ended, he fell to his knees, but she reached down and caught him at the last second before he fell on his face. He was heavy in her arms, his body more solid than it looked underneath his black and red suit. She gently laid him on the ground and then stood up to wipe the sweat off her brow. As calm as she had looked, her heart had been pounding the entire time.

Finally, Uraraka turned to face the others. Iida wore an expression that looked torn between relief and disapproval. Obviously he was happy that he hadn’t been forced to execute Bakugou, but he wasn’t pleased that Uraraka had gotten in the way and disobeyed a direct order. She wouldn’t have been surprised if he decided to assess her level again, but he didn’t. Ignoring an order wasn’t the same as committing a crime. In her heart, she knew that her score was fine, if not lowered now. She gazed down at Bakugou, who looked so peaceful that he might as well simply be taking a nap. He never let himself be this relaxed.

In a way, he almost looked happy, which was strange, seeing as how she’d just shot him. He’d definitely be feeling that later. She did not want to be around him when he woke up.

Midoriya had a hand on Mina’s shoulder, reassuring her that everything was alright. Despite the fact that he had embraced the role of Enforcer, Uraraka got the feeling that he would never be able to shake the Inspector out of him. He must have been like her, the type that cared for his subordinates, but unlike her, it had gotten to him. She felt a stab of shame, not knowing where it came from. Why didn’t it affect her so much? She knew that she wasn’t heartless since it was her concern for them that bothered Bakugo. Yet while Midoriya had fallen from grace, here she was, surrounded by corpses, almost kidnapped, and had someone’s blood all over her and she was fine. Why was she so much better off than Kaminari, who had been deemed a latent criminal as a child, or Mina, who had simply gotten mixed up in the wrong crowd and determined to be one by association?

Those were questions for another day. Uraraka was honestly too exhausted to sort through them now. All she wanted to do was take a hot shower to get this blood off and work on the report so she could sleep. Likely everyone would need to go to a therapy session to ensure that their scores didn’t get too high. Iida was constantly on them to make sure that they remained vigilant in taking care of themselves unlike a lot of Inspectors that treated their Enforcers as disposable. She supposed that part of it came from the fact that he and Midoriya had worked together. Maybe seeing him go from Inspector to Enforcer had made him realize that they needed to be taken care of as well.

A hand on her shoulder jerked Uraraka out of her thoughts. She’d expected it to be Iida, but when she looked back, she saw that it was Midoriya. “You did well. Thank you.”

That caught Uraraka off guard. She twisted her lips into a frown. “Thank you? What for?”

��For believing in him,” Midoriya said, “for saving him.” He pulled his hand away and dropped his gaze down to Bakugou. The two of them were often at odds with each other – to the point where the rumors about Bakugou forcing his score to go up didn’t seem like rumors – but it was obvious in moments like these that Midoriya admired him. “Not many people would, if any, especially Inspectors.”

“Would you?” Uraraka asked.

Midoriya’s lips twitched into a half smile. “I’m here, aren’t I?”

It wasn’t Bakugou’s fault that Midoriya was an Enforcer, but he’d had something to do with it. One day, she would ask him about it. For now, she let him keep the secret. It was theirs and she had no right to it. Enforcers had so little that was actually theirs to keep. They couldn’t own much of anything and had little more freedom than the latent criminals locked away under therapy. She’d let them decide to tell her on their own time.

When Midoriya walked away to help Kaminari, Uraraka crouched down next to Bakugou. She picked up his fallen Dominator and set it aside next to hers. In anyone else’s hands but theirs, the weapons were harmless. With her hands freed, she brushed his ash-blond hair out of his face. It was softer than she’d expected from how spikey it looked. She imagined that he rolled out of bed like this and tousled it to look just right. He had an image to keep up, after all. The thought made her smile.

You’re more than this, Uraraka thought. You can be more.

This wasn’t where his story ended. He still had a job to do and a life to live.

85 notes · View notes

justslowdown · 7 years ago

Note

i was so excited when i saw you’d be breeding your dogs and i’d love to know more about your plans for other breeds you’re bringing in! will you be focusing more on making them less prey drivey? i would be interested in a puppy from you in a year or two, how do you think the puppies you’re breeding will change between now and then? and thank you! i’ve been thinking the only way to get a good health tested dog was purebred, and i’m sooo glad it’s not the only route!

❤️ ❤️ ❤️

Thank you so much for sending this (and your other ask ❤️). I promise I tried to answer this concisely but… at this point I’m sure you know I can’t do that, haha.

You (or anyone!) can feel free to pm me if you want to chat about getting a pup down the road, or for help finding another crossbreeder who health tests and has what you’re looking for :) We don’t have breed clubs to network through, or support from the wider community, so it can be tough to find us.

EDIT: Disclaimer that this is my first litter, I’m always learning, and plans will absolutely change as time goes on!

Yeah, part of the goal is harnessing the husky prey drive into something both controllable and useful. Kai is a good example of this.

Part of his job is vermin control (unfortunately necessary where I live and with what I use the land for), as well as going into all-out destroy mode when there’s a raccoon or opossum trying to get into my chicken coop or rabbit cages. But he’s gentle, eager to please, very trainable, cares if I tell him no… Callie’s a true husky and she gets her own ideas. There’s no coming between her and a running animal. Kai’s just as intense with things he’s been taught are prey, but has that “stop and think” response with my stock.

This first litter probably will be pet material, not (light) working like Kai. I’ll be keeping a bitch and hopefully placing another in a breeding home. The next gen will be crossed with lower-key, multipurpose working farmdogs. Kai has a collie girlfriend lined up now too, for a litter after I move next year! at Widdershins Farmcollies

So, this litter is laying the groundwork, next few will be closer to my goal. Biddable, human-oriented, trainable without being high drive and intense, spitzy farmdogs. Sturdy, athletic, and moderate build.

The loyal, calm, confident, bombproof, low-anxiety demeanor I love about Kai is something I really want to keep in my lines. Callie’s sunny, optimistic, good-natured personality too. Part of my goal is to breed great, easygoing pets for a moderately active people, even ones that don’t have a ton of dog experience.

Future breed options:

Farm collies, scotch collies–not purebred, bred for function as a small farm/homestead dog. So, good stock sense, good pest and predator control instincts, some herding potential, but not an over-the-top or obsessive herding drive (which actually can be thought of as a prey drive without the last couple steps in the sequence). Intuitive, sensitive, devoted to their humans, hardworking.And that indescribable Lassie quality.

English shepherds are something I’ve considered but have heard some lines are more “hard” or intense than I’m looking for. I like that they learn rules and routine around a farm and work to uphold them.

Working line shelties would be great! Sadly, not many are bred for actual work, just trial herding, which is definitely not what I need in a dog. Upright, loose-eyed herding would be handy but there’s so much more a homestead farmdog than just herding. So different from ranch-style hyperspecialist border collies, for example.

If I can find Siberians that aren’t high prey drive (doubtful), I’d love to cross more of those in. I adore the husky independence/self-direction, freethinking problem solving, functional weatherproof coat, stamina, square sturdy practical build, pull drive (carting/sledding/joring!!). I enjoy that they’re loving and sweet without being up your ass all the time. The howling and talking. The EARS. No handler or stranger aggression, very low in fear/anxiety (if well bred). Just… good, solid dogs.

Some spitz breeds that are more trainable, like the Siberian laika breeds, could be an option. Prey drive is useful. Out of control prey drive is… not.

Then there’s the rare herding spitz breeds, like Nenets herding laika, Finnish lapphund, Lapponian herder, Icelandic sheepdog. If I can find people in the US breeding them for work, not show, I’d be all over that. Considering importing down the road.

I’m going back and forth on Chinook. I’ve talked with an amazing breeder, super crossbreeding-friendly (did an outcross litter recently!), and love the sound of their temperament. Generic working dog. Not intense, not too challenging to own, but just a seriously solid, useful, multipurpose dog. Sled dog and herding foundation dogs with a dash of mastiff. I just… don’t… like how they look :/ That’s such a petty thing but if I’m going to look at a dog for 12+ yrs, I want to enjoy looking at it, y’know? I think I’d need to breed from a Chinook cross, not a purebred, to get the aesthetic I’m going for.

Real herding GSDs are even harder to find than farm-bred multipurpose ones but I’d consider either if they had solid temperaments and were health tested.

Mixes of any of the above, of course!

And in the end, it all comes down to the individual dogs, not the breed or type.

So! Yeah, as you can imagine, I’m planning for this project to be decades and decades long, and it will take a lot of help, co-owns, and cooperation with other breeders.

Every litter will be unique. I don’t want to create a breed, even one with an open studbook. I want to continuously work on a general type that does what I want, looks how I want, and has the temperament I want. The pups that go to pet or hobby sport homes should thrive in that lifestyle too, but down the road (definitely not in this upcoming litter, sadly) I hope to produce a few working prospects in every litter.

10 notes · View notes

loquaciousquark · 7 years ago

Text

30th Wintermarch. Sunlight peeked through the cloud cover for almost a full two minutes this afternoon and I nearly took flight from joy

I’ve been reading Art and Shame: Forbidden Wonders of Faith by Foisine De Petitforet, and aside from the forbidden wonder of Foisine’s name, I am vastly intrigued by the asides she keeps adding in the margins of the more controversial pieces. One of them talks about how she believes the absence of clear power always leads to the worst person possible seizing it, and I couldn’t help but think about Kirkwall.

The viscount’s seat has been empty almost three years now. There are more templars than city guard in the streets these days, and Aveline says Meredith’s officers keep coming to her demanding she account for herself whenever she makes a decision that doesn’t involve them. She’s refused them so far--she says she won’t ever turn over the city’s authority to what ought to be a Gallows-restricted arm of the Chantry, no matter how much they press, but Donnic looks uneasy when she says so.

Well, it’s not

Hm. I was going to say it’s not any of my business, but somehow it feels like everyone will be caught up in it whether they like it or not. (Elthina would prefer not, according to Sebastian, but I think she thinks Meredith and Orsino are more reasonable than history has shown me.)

Well! I shall remain optimistic. Until the city starts coming down around us, anyway, and then I shall take my dog and my favorite blanket and flee into the hinterlands to live as a hermit for the rest of my days, eating rabbits and the moss that grows on trees and shaking my staff at passersby.

13th Guardian. Shocking cold front came through last night--all the world’s icy glass. Very pretty and violently annoying, especially when one’s great hall holds heat as well as a linen dropcloth

Was at Elegant’s today for tea, and Tomwise came! It was the first time she and he and Worthy and I had all been in the same place since before I moved to Hightown. Had a marvelous time reminiscing about simpler (poorer) years, and then Elegant’s husband came in to say hello and we all went prim as roses. He knows, I think, but he’s awfully dour about questionable legality, so she’s asked us to avoid the more overtly murderous stories when he’s around.

Reminds me of Stinton, to be quite honest, with the difference that Elegant seems to genuinely like her husband. Curious!

Tomwise did say business has been worryingly good lately. He said the Coterie’s been ordering poisons in bulk, that everyone seems to be feeling the tension lately. Not much any of us can do for it from Elegant’s tea-room.

Oh! And Elegant told me Aveline’s not the only one with Chantry bells ringing--Jule and Pelarie are getting married in the summer! I’m to be invited over Lady Ashbridge’s objections as I’m the one who introduced them. I’m so glad for them--and if nothing else, they’ll be able to get away from their mothers now. Oh, good for them both. Maker keep them in health and happiness, at least until they’ve managed their own place.

19th Guardian. Not quite as cold, but "brisk” is the most generous of interpretations

Rarely does a trip to the market leave me quite so wrung. Then again, rarely do I eavesdrop quite as blatantly as I did (I’m normally much more surreptitious), so perhaps it’s what I deserved.

I just wanted some sweets. There’s a chocolatier beside Jean-Luc’s who makes the most amazing honeyed almonds and nut brittle, and I thought it might be a nice surprise tomorrow at cards. Merrill’s been bringing this sweet dessert-y liqueur along lately, and it seemed like it would match well. (I also managed to find the owner of that little carved figurine with “Bright Heart” engraved on the bottom--turns out it belongs to a little girl who lives just down the road from Jean-Luc, a gift from her father for her seventh birthday. It had fallen out of her bag and he’d taken her all over the city without luck. Glad I could find that one’s home again.)

Anyway, after I finished off the first little bag of almonds myself and had to go back for a second to actually bring to WG, I was walking back through the Hightown Market and happened to glimpse Orana standing at a stall I didn’t recognize, one of the new ones that came in with that Orlesian caravan last month. It was covered in fancy silks and the trader wore a silk half-mask lined in jewels. (I wish I were joking. And considering I strongly doubt an Orlesian would be caught dead in paste rubies, that mask was almost certainly worth more than my entire wardrobe.)

She was asking about a pipe. I knew why the moment I saw it--it’s perfect for Bodahn--he’s been looking for something like it for years, as long as I’ve known him. It was made of meerschaum and had a lovely intricate geometric pattern carved into it. Very beautiful and very dwarvish. And very expensive, which is why the merchant wore a sneer so enormous it knocked his mask askew.

I tell you, journal, I was ready to storm him like the Black City. I was halfway across the square when I saw Orana draw herself up in that way that usually means I’m about to be crushed like a beetle, so I--well, I stopped, and ducked in the most awkward fashion behind Hubert’s stand so she wouldn’t notice.

Orana’s trade is very good. I forget how good, sometimes, aside from the occasional odd sentence structure, because she has hardly any accent. That changed for this merchant. She went full Tevinter on him--cold as ice, her accent thickening with all those heavy vowels that could make anyone sound noble, even a slight elf of barely twenty, and even though she didn’t raise her voice in the slightest she made it perfectly clear that her patronage was an honor to him instead of the other way around, that everyone in this city knew who she was and in whose household she served, and that if he didn’t improve his demeanor immediately he would find his tariffs of import abruptly so high he’d have to forgo the feed for his mule and pull his silken cart himself.

Flames, but he went white. Gave her a mighty discount, too, and flinched when she scattered the coins on his stand instead of handing them to him directly, as if she couldn’t bear to touch him. I didn’t even know her face was capable of haughty. Haught?

I didn’t know what to make of it. I’d half a mind to go after her and make sure she was all right, if nothing else, but then who should come around the corner but Fenris, and when Orana saw him she went straight up and said something in Tevene I couldn’t follow. He looked concerned, but not unduly so, and said something back in the same language, and then he turned and went with her back up the stairs towards the Amell estate and out of sight.

I’ve been thinking about it all day.

Did she learn that behavior from Hadriana? She must have--I can’t imagine someone as gentle as she says her father was teaching her such things. It was certainly effective in putting that snide little man in his place, but...surely it must rankle to have to pull on lessons learned during slavery when you thought you were free, learned from someone infinitely cruel, who taught only by example on you and on the ones you loved.

Or is it worth it? If the payoff is forcing someone to respect you at last, when no one ever has before. When no one ever thought they should.

I wondered if Danarius

I think Merrill would say everyone ought to respect everyone else just because they’re people. I wish someone had taught the Orlesian merchant that lesson.

I asked Varric to help temporarily misplace some of his paperwork on the way out, though, just out of spite.

25th Guardian. Drizzly, chilly

Fenris said Orana was a little shaken but otherwise all right. She hadn’t meant to make a scene but his mask had reminded her of a man who used to attend Hadriana’s parties who made the slaves’ lives miserable, and she grew so angry she had to stand up for herself, and by proxy for them. She hadn’t thought it would work quite so well and was a little afraid he’d come after her, which is why she’d asked Fenris to help her get home.

He didn’t elaborate further, and I didn’t ask. Even I can tell when there are parts of a story I’m not meant to hear.

I will say Bodahn adores the pipe, and Orana looked so proud as she gave it to him that it all seemed worth it. Though I suppose that’s for her to decide, not me.

(I’d still very much like to give that fellow a knock right over the Hightown wall. Hmph.)

9th Drakonis. I hate Drakonis. What a miserable month

Letter from Carver today I’ll tuck in for safekeeping later. He reminded me of how he and Bethany used to talk in their own language and make me so angry at being left out. For whatever reason they’d slowly stopped using it as they grew up, and I’d forgotten all about it... Apparently there’s a set of twin sisters in one of the Warden units and they can read each other so well they don’t even have to speak.

I wonder if they have a sister at home waiting for their letters too. I’m wondering all sorts of things these days, it seems.

14th Drakonis. Toby took two steps out the back door this morning and immediately came back in soaking wet and exceedingly indignant

Spent most of the morning’s trip out to the Coast wondering why Fenris’s scarf looked so familiar. I’d forgotten it’s the one I’d given him two Satinalias ago, oops. At least it looks very warm.

Came home in time to hear Orana reading off a shopping list to Bodahn, and had the realization three damned years late that for all the time I spent teaching Fenris to read, it never one flaming time occurred to me to ask if Orana could.

Bodahn said her father had taught her a handful of letters in secret, and Bodahn himself had taught her the rest, a few months after she’d arrived. He didn’t mention it because it was right after Mother had died and he’d thought I’d had enough on my plate.

Not too much for that, though. I wish he’d told me. I wish it had occurred to me any moment before today.

He said she had been a very quick study but hadn’t wanted me to know, in case I’d been angry she’d learned. Then she’d grown to understand us all better, but by that time it hardly seemed worth bringing up because everyone around her was reading, anyway.

Damn.

Damn!

25th Drakonis. Almost comfortable outside, which is saying a great deal

Got Orana a little journal. I haven’t the faintest idea if she’ll use it, but burn me at the pyre if she doesn’t at least have the chance.

Had such vivid dreams of Fenris last night I was quietly panicking about desire demons all morning, but Merrill says she’s not noticed anything lately. (That could be because she’s been so deep in the mirror issue she hasn’t seen daylight in weeks, but who am I to break mirrors, no matter how much I might wish to?)

In other news, Aveline marries in just under six weeks! Had Sebastian and me over yesterday to help her with a few details, since Sebastian has an in with the Chantry and I have exquisitely fine taste. And the willingness to carry things from room to room, which I suspect is more the purpose Aveline wished. She said Donnic intends to ask Fenris to stand up with him and she wanted to be sure I was all right, since I’m standing up with Aveline. Of course, said I, almost entirely meaning it, but it was at least enough to convince her to drop the subject.

I made her show me her gown at the end. White and gold, and Merrill’s going to make her a crown of marigolds for her hair. She will be beautiful. Is, too, but when they open those doors Donnic will see the light of the Maker coming to meet him.

Aveline told me (very gruffly) that she’d sent an invitation to Isabela’s last known location, but hadn’t heard anything in return. She knows as well as I do not to expect anything from that quarter. If three years without my scintillating company hasn’t brought the pirate wench home again, Aveline’s wedding hardly will either.

Ugh.

I know very well that the only reason I’m so bitter is that I miss her dreadfully. How tedious, to be so aware of one’s faults and too stubborn to do a single thing to rectify them.

19th Cloudreach. The sun shone today so brightly the sea nearly looked warm

Drowning in wedding preparations. Should I ever marry, I will stand before a Chantry mother with no one else present and not an ounce of cake. I’m not even sure I’ll allow my spouse-to-be to attend.

25th Cloudreach. Went out without coat or scarf today and skipped across Hightown at how light it felt

Anders has been rather withdrawn lately, so I went to Darktown this morning to help him out at the clinic. I’d made up some potions and poultices from the cache of elfroot we found rooting out those slavers last month, and I thought that’d be enough to please him. Instead he looked hollow-eyed and thin as paper, and barely said “thank you” before asking me to help him dig through sewer waste.

He looked as bitter as he did during that whole mess with Alrik a few years ago, down in the tunnels beneath the city. There weren’t even any innocent girls to nearly kill this time, so I haven’t any idea why he’s so faint.

He did say there had been unfortunate circumstances regarding certain underground factions. He wouldn’t tell me anything else.

That man used to trust me, once.

30th Cloudreach. Promise of clear warmth on the horizon--it better follow through, too, or I’m taking it straight to Andraste

Night before Summerday, and the night before Aveline’s wedding! She’s staying here at the estate tonight so we can all help her get ready tomorrow. It’d have been a shorter walk to the Chantry from the barracks, but she’d have also had to walk through the barracks in her wedding dress, and even now I think there are some things she’d like to keep private. Even if she does look splendid in this gown.

We hosted a small dinner for her and Donnic tonight--the big wedding feast will be tomorrow, but this was just for us and two of Donnic’s brothers. Anders came--I doubted, but he did--and Merrill, and Sebastian and Fenris and Varric, and everyone was so civil to each other I nearly fainted from shock.

One of Donnic’s brothers also asked to take me to dinner some time, which was very funny. Not at the time--I know my eyes flickered a bit helplessly between all involved and utterly oblivious parties scattered across the room--and then I shrugged and said I was complicatedly in love with someone who either complicatedly returned the sentiment or just deeply enjoyed stringing me along, but I’d look him up should it ever fall through. He laughed and thanked me for my honesty, and brought me another glass of wine to drown my sorrows.

I asked Aveline, later, how she was feeling. Bittersweet, she said... she had been thinking of Wesley a great deal, and wondering about Donnic’s parents, and daydreaming about how their lives might change over the next few years. She said she’d worried about falling in love again, once upon a time, until my mother had sat her down and talked the sense right into her again. She’d told her hearts always found a little room to grow, no matter the scars, and that happiness could sometimes be all the sweeter for the grief that came before.

I will say only it had better not show the slightest peep of a cloud tomorrow. After everything else, she deserves to have decent weather on her wedding day.

1st Bloomingtide, Summerday, clear as a glass and warm and beautiful in every way, thank you Andraste for your kindness, I’m blowing you dozens of kisses

They are married. Beautiful weather, and a beautiful ceremony--as I’d thought, Donnic nearly toppled over as he and Aveline came out the doors towards each other and he tripped twice walking her down the aisle to the Chantry mother. Merrill’s marigolds shone in the sun like little suns of their own. She’d done a circlet of sorts that trailed down in the back and wove through Aveline’s hair, which was loose for the first time in my memory and softened her so much I should hardly have recognized her if I hadn’t been the one helping her do it.

Donnic looked marvelous, too. He wore a simple brown suit and a white vest with just a trim of gold around the buttons--a sound decision, given he’s so steadfast and calm, and leagues better than the flashy embroidered nonsense all over the last society wedding I attended with Mother. Not that I think he could see a thing aside from Aveline’s face the whole hour the mother spoke, anyway.

Fenris and I were right behind them, and I’m delighted to report, journal, that I was so preoccupied with my overweening gladness for Aveline that I handled myself with more aplomb than I’ve ever managed in my life. He wore the same coat he did the night he came to the Champion’s ball for me, and I must say it looked sharp as a knife next to my own dark yellow gown (less fine than Aveline’s, naturally, but it was kinder to me than some shades she nearly chose).

I will also say I was very, very pleased at the attendance. More of the guard came than I expected, and all our friends, of course, and Donnic’s enormous family, but so too came quite a few friends of both Aveline and Donnic I hardly knew aside from the faces. We didn’t quite fill the Chantry, but it was awfully close, and anyway they all looked glad enough for the two of them I was satisfied.

The feast after was enormous and had excellent wine. Varric found some artisan pâtissier straight from the Winter Palace who is the direct cause of my pants not fitting tonight, and between the glorious Fereldan-style flat cake and the three-tiered champagne glass tower, it’s a wonder anyone will be able to roll out of bed tomorrow.

Aveline and Donnic are away tomorrow morning for a honeymoon in Orlais. No one will say precisely where, though I’m certain Varric knows, and for once I’m glad she’ll be away so long. We’ve all promised to keep an eye on the guard in her absence, just in case the templars begin edging somewhere they shouldn’t. (Not, in retrospect, that I’ll likely be able to do much, but a promise is a promise.)

They played Fereldan fiddle songs once everyone was deep enough in their cups to dance without worrying about what their neighbors might thing. I haven’t danced the River Dane’s Line since Lothering, though more people knew it than I’d thought, and then they played Those Sweet Brown Eyes, Oh, and before I could help it I looked over and saw Fenris across the room looking back at me. It was the same tune we danced to a hundred years ago at the Hanged Man for Satinalia, when Mother was still alive and I was wondering if we’d ever be friends again.

He smiled when he saw me looking. Neither of us danced--the whole room was between us, and by the time I’d have reached him the squares would have been set, but I could see the memory was as plain for him as it was for me, and as pleasant.

He did come over after and compliment both my dress and the decorations (part of my wedding present). This time I had the presence of mind to admire his coat in candlelight, instead of the shadows behind shrubbery, and it looks as good on him as I’d thought. It has just the barest lining of gold thread at the sleeve cuffs and the trim of the wide belt, and he wears it so very well.

One final note, and then I must sleep: towards the end of our conversation, Donnic’s brother (the middle one, who asked me to dinner the other week) came up and joined us in the conversation. He said nothing overt and was as pleasant throughout as any family of Donnic’s ought to be, but at the end he bowed over my hand and told Fenris that should he ever cede the war, he’d be happy to take up the colors in his place.

Fenris looked confused long enough for me to stumble over some nonsense explanation as Donnic’s brother left, but I’m certain he put it together soon enough. One day I should like to meet someone who declines to heckle me to my face.

It was a beautiful wedding, though.

#fenris #hawke #fenris/hawke #dragon age #quark writes #hawke's journal tag #and some #aveline/donnic

82 notes · View notes