#and finding the source isn't helpful to treatment

[kerosene-saint]

I wish I wasn't chronically ill :[

[thethingything]

I need to get ready for bed but I remembered the dentist appointment that's coming up in less than 2 weeks and ended up dissociating for over 2 hours (I'm honestly not sure how long it's been) and I do not feel good in the slightest after that

[night-raven-tattler]

What's your ideal type?

Summary: What would be the best traits for their potential partner to have?

A/N: I didn't want to leave Lilia out of the series even though I only write platonic relationships with him, so I wrote about his ideal friend instead. Enjoy!

Characters: Diasomnia dorm (Malleus, Sebek, Silver) x GN!Reader (separate, romantic), Lilia and GN!Reader (platonic)

Other parts of the series: Heartslabyul, Savanaclaw, Octavinelle, Scarabia, Pomefiore, Ignihyde

Warnings: none

By opening the document, you agree to Mx Tattly's terms of source confidentiality.

-ˋˏ’✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Malleus' ideal type would be...

Someone who playfully teases him. Malleus can be quite a tease himself, and enjoys seeing people squirm under his playful eyes. While he knows how it feels to be at the receiving end of that treatment thanks to Lilia, he'd still get surprised if you reciprocate.

Someone who can see beauty in the desolate. Being the goth king-to-be that he is, Malleus' tastes tend to gravitate towards darker aesthetics: abandoned buldings, antiques, vintage paintings and furniture, gargoyles... He can't help but be slightly upset when people mistake a grotesque for a gargoyle, but he's amazed when you correct them before he gets to.

Someone who can enjoy grand gestures. It's possible it is a byproduct of him being a prince, but Malleus and words such as "subtle" or "small" are from different worlds. He just wants to shower you with the best offerings to show his attention. Maybe his desire to put valuables with you is because dragons tend to hoard treasure?

Someone who isn't afraid to call him out on things. Malleus is many things: powerful, wise, capable and kind. But he's also stubborn, prideful and has a tendency to do things first and ask later. When he unintentionally crosses your boundaries, tell him. When he plans to do something before asking, tell him. Don't be his yes man. He'll respect you immensely for calling him out. After all, you ability to treat him like any other student is what drew him to you in the first place.

『••✎••』

Lilia's ideal friend would be...

Someone who appreciates cooking. Lilia is a creative person, and it really shows in his cooking (for better or for worse). While eating his food is... a bit of a challenge, your interest would not go unnoticed. Who knows, maybe enough interest would have him allow you join him for a cooking session! A perfect opportunity to stop him from being too creative.

Someone who can take his jokes and pranks. What can I say, Lilia loves having a good laugh, even if sometimes comes at the expense of pulling a prank or two. While harmless, his pranks can be annoying. Take them on as a challenge, and you'll never find your slippers again, or you will have all of your mugs laid on your kitchen floor face down once every 17 mornings. Depends on you if you find that fun or not.

Someone who gets along with Silver and Malleus. His sons are his pride and joy, no matter what. While Lilia knows that sometimes people just don't fit well together, he can recognise effort when he sees it. If you want that spot at the dinner table, you have to get along with his family first.

Someone who can still love the world, despite any hardships. Lilia has lived on this earth for long and faced heartbreak after heartbreak, uncertainty and grief. His healing is not over, and that's okay. He'll appreciate you talking to him about how the would doesn't suck that badly after all.

『••✎••』

Sebek's ideal type would be...

Someone who respects Malleus and Lilia. If you want any chance of even getting along with Sebek, you have to pay your respects to two of the people he respects the most. While you don't have to kiss the ground they walk on, a few nods of approval during Sebek's endless speeches about their glory and superiority would not go unnoticed.

Someone who likes praising him. I'm not saying Sebek is easily swayed by praise, but he'd be joyous to hear how well he's doing. He's a dedicated guard with perfect scores at school and a will strong enough to move mountains. While the praise directed at him would be something he's not really accustomed to, he'd stop trying to redirect the praise towards Malleus soon enough.

Someone who challenges him. Sebek is not the most agreeable person, but he's always open to learning and improving himself. He's just very, very stubborn. You don't have to dismantle his whole ideology about humans or anything like that. Instead, just give him the puzzle pieces: he'll enjoy the challenge to figure out your thought process while trying to prove you wrong. Whatever the outcome is, Sebek will always come out of the other side with a newfound respect for you.

Someone who can teach him how to be gentle. Yes, Sebek is loud, extra and arrogant. But, above all, he wants to do right by his loved ones. If you can teach him how to come from a place of compassion and genuine goodwill instead of having him default on his aggresive demeanor, he'd be quite amazed with you. His job was never to be kind and gentle, but he can still be those things while protecting the people around him. He'll treasure everything you'll teach him, and he'll hold you in his heart close to his idols.

『••✎••』

Silver's ideal type would be...

Someone who respects Malleus and Lilia. While Silver is not the type to sing their praises during every moment of the day, he respects his liege and his father more than anything. He can't have someone disrespect two of the most important people in his life. It's the bare minimum for him if you want him to pay you any mind.

Someone who is earnest. Silver is a kind and sweet boy. His help and advice are always genuine. His dedication to protect the people he loves come from a desire to pay back the goodwill of the people in his life. He might not notice when people don't have the most genuine intentions, but he can tell when you are a nice person, especially to the people around him. His wariness will quickly dwindle, and he will warm up to you in no time.

Someone who knows when to nudge him awake and when to let him sleep. Silver dislikes how often he falls asleep during the day, and has a lot of guilt from not being to stay awake. He really takes note of how people react when he falls asleep near them or when they wake him up. Even though he still feels very helpless against his curse, if you still treat him just the same then he'd feel the littlest bit less guilty about it.

Someone who shows him he's enough. Above all else, Silver believes in paying back the kindness he has received from the world. He works very hard, harder than needed. Sometimes he needs to be sat down and told that he is doing enough. He is enough. It will not change his hard working nature overnight, but acknowledging his efforts sure makes him feel like he's going in the right direction.

[keferon]

Why’d monster hunter brainstorm timetravel to the specific era the story takes place?

Will the others ever see his alt mode?

The reason is the same as in canon - he wanted to save Quark.

Okay, I'll try and keep this short and sweet.

Brainstorm lives in the far future and is happy with Quark, until one day it turns out that Quark has a fatal spark disease that will kill him if nothing is done about it. They of course go to the hospital, but it turns out that only certain types of the disease are treatable and modern science still can't do anything about it.

Long story short, no one knows how to cure Quark's spark.

Brainstorm, as a true scientist and a good conjunx, naturally begins to research the subject himself and stumbles upon some strange information. All the sources, studies and records on the study of this disease go back a long fucking way. All that modern scientists have been doing for the last million years is just improving and refining the method of treatment, which was invented in absolute antiquity.

Brainstorm investigates further.

He discovers, all the original research records belonged to a mech named Perseptor, who amongst many other things was studying sparks. And it's when Brainstorm manages to get his hands on copies of these very original records that he finally realises why no one has been able to take this research any further. The records are very well structured, detailed and accurate, but half of the information is taken out of nowhere. The Perseptor specifies the types of sparks that certain substances affect in certain ways, but nowhere does he mention where he got this information from. He might, for example, write that certain types of sparks tend to develop internal micro-cracks when exposed to certain factors for long periods of time. And Brainstorm, having read that, can only stare blankly into space, because yes, micro-cracks in sparks is something that exists. But even in his time, there's no equipment that can detect them if they're INSIDE. So how the hell did an ancient mech with his primitive tools figure all this out???

His curiosity isn't satisfied. The research just cuts off in the middle, as if the mech that did it just abandoned it or died suddenly.

Brainstorm, like many scientists before him, tries to start his own research based on the information pointed out by Perseptor, but finds himself at the same dead end as all the medicine of his time. He just doesn't have the same mysterious way of collecting data that this...Perseptor had.

And Quark isn't getting any better

Eventually, Brainstorm comes up with a brilliant idea. What if, instead of trying to find a cure, he just (ha! Just.) went back in time and saved the dude who was definitely going to invent the cure but didn't have time? He decides it's genius and creates a time machine.

He goes back in time to find Perseptor and well, he gets a surprise. Turns out the dude who researched spark disease was a spark eater. And also on the verge of starvation, but Brainstorm finds a way to help him, it's all good:) It turns out that all this time, Perseptor didn't have any mysterious equipment to analyse the sparks, he was the equipment himself. In fact, he didn't specify the sources of his findings for the research, because the phrase ‘I figured it out because it tasted different’ sounds incredibly compromising and would have signed Percy's death warrant if his notes had fallen into the wrong hands.

Next, I'm not sure how it would have developed. I think as the story progresses, Perseptor and Brainstorm work together to invent a cure for Quark. And then, if you like to cry, Brainstorm goes back to the future and cures him, and Perseptor stays in the past.

If you want adventure, Brainstorm could take Percy back to the future with him. Quark would be really fucking scared and confused at first, but they'd figure it out quickly and conjunx Percy into their futuristic fluffy pairing. (Also, I have a lot of fun thinking about Brainstorm and Quark showing Percy the advances of future science, and the future world in general.

Also, I think Brainstorm would do a good job of hiding his alt mode while he was in the past, but a couple of times would use it to escape from someone. One time he'd also give Percy a ride, and I know Percy would be incredibly freaked out by the breakneck speed that jets can achieve ahahaha

——

That…wasn’t as short as I wanted…..my inner fic writer took control

[copperbadge]

Hi Sam, could you please recommend any resources/websites to learn about ADHD medication? Until reading your post about second-line meds I thought Adderal was the only one

I can definitely talk about it a little! Always bearing in mind that I am not a doctor and this is not medical advice, etc. etc.

So, I've had many friends with ADHD in my life before I got my diagnosis and I picked up some stuff from them even before getting diagnosed; I also spoke with my prescribing psychiatrist about options when we met. If you think your psychiatrist might be resistant to discussing options, or you don't have one, doing your own research is good, but it's not really a substitute for a specialist in medication management. So it's also important to know what your needs are -- ie, "I want help with my executive function but I need something that's nonaddictive" or "I want something nonsedative" or "I don't think the treatment I'm on is working, what is available outside of this kind of medication?"

The problems you run into with researching medication for ADHD are threefold:

Most well-informed sources aren't actually geared towards non-doctor adults who just want to know what their options are -- they're usually either doctors who don't know how to talk about medication to non-doctors, or doctors (and parents) talking to parents about pediatric options.

A huge number of sites when you google are either AI-generated, covert ads for stimulant addiction rehab, or both.

Reliable sites with easy-to-understand information are not updated super often.

So you just kind of have to be really alert and read the "page" itself for context clues -- is it a science journal, is it an organization that helps people with ADHD, is it a doctor, is it a rehab clinic, is it a drug advertiser, is it a random site with a weird URL that's probably AI generated, etc.

So for example, ADDitude Magazine, which is kind of the pre-eminent clearinghouse for non-scholarly information on ADHD, is a great place to start, but when the research is clearly outlined it sometimes isn't up-to-date, and when it's up-to-date it's often a little impenetrable. They have an extensive library of podcast/webinars, and I started this particular research with this one, but his slides aren't super well-organized, he flips back and forth between chemical and brand name, and he doesn't always designate which is which. However, he does have a couple of slides that list off a bunch of medications, so I just put those into a spreadsheet, gleaned what I could from him, and then searched each medication. I did find a pretty good chart at WebMD that at least gives you the types and brand names fairly visibly. (Fwiw with the webinar, I definitely spent more time skimming the transcript than listening to him, auto transcription isn't GOOD but it is helpful in speeding through stuff like that.)

I think, functionally, there are four types of meds for ADHD, and the more popular ones often have several variations. Sometimes this is just for dosage purposes -- like, if you have trouble swallowing pills there are some meds that come in liquids or patches, so it's useful to learn the chemical name rather than the brand name, because then you can identify several "brands" that all use the same chemical and start to differentiate between them.

Top of the list you have your methylphenidate and your amphetamine, those are the two types of stimulant medications; the most well known brand names for these are Ritalin (methylphenidate) and Adderall (amphetamine).

Then there's the nonstimulant medications, SNRIs (Strattera, for example) and Alpha-2 Agonists (guanfacine and clonidine, brand names Kapvay and Intuniv; I'm looking at these for a second-line medication). There's some crossover between these and the next category:

Antidepressants are sometimes helpful with ADHD symptoms as well as being helpful for depression; I haven't looked at these much because for me they feel like the nuclear option, but it's Dopamine reuptake inhibitors like Wellbutrin and tricyclics like Tofranil. If you're researching these you don't need to look at like, every antidepressant ever, just look for ones that are specifically mentioned in context with ADHD.

Lastly there are what I call the Offlabels -- medications that we understand to have an impact on ADHD for some people, but which aren't generally prescribed very often, and sometimes aren't approved for use. I don't know much about these, either, because they tend to be for complex cases that don't respond to the usual scrips and are particularly difficult to research. The one I have in my notes is memantine (brand name Namenda) which is primarily a dementia medication that has shown to be particularly helpful for social cognition in people with combined Autism/ADHD.

So yeah -- hopefully that's a start for you, but as with everything online, don't take my word for it -- I'm also a lay person and may get stuff wrong, so this is just what I've found and kept in my notes. Your best bet truly is to find a psychiatrist specializing in ADHD medication management and discuss your options with them. Good luck!

[pietrosbulletsstuff]

Waking up pietro to ask him to help you fall asleep 

As you tossed and turned for what seemed like hours and hours until you finally decided to check the time.. 2:49 am read back. You turned over and looked at Pietro for a few minutes debating if you wanted to wake him. You've been debating about this for a while as you started up at the ceiling. You didn't want to bother him but you've tried almost everything to fall asleep. You tap pietro lightly a couple of times. You slowly started to become impatient. 

“Pietro” you say while tapping him lighting on his shoulder. 

‘What's the matter” his accent more proficient since he just woke up 

“I can't fall asleep" you say as you look at him with a slight pout. 

You make eye contact in the dark the only light source being from the small plug from the wall

he asks “well in what way do you want me to help? baby..” Touching the side of your face. 

“Pietro, you know how you can help me.. Please?” 

Pietro pretends to think for a moment– after what seemed hours you turned your back towards him- embarrassed nevermind 

Without saying anything you turned over pulling some of the cover with you, rolling your eyes.

    Pietro laughs as he jokingly asks you to turn over. you ignore him feeling embarrassed that this happened. He moves closer to you in the bed and says “Baby I'm sorry.. I know what you want.” while kissing your neck. “I just wanted to mess with you a little. That's all, I promise I'm sorry.”

You decided to give pietro the silent treatment. You can feel pietro sitting up in the bed moving towards the end of the bed but don't pay it any attention. As he gently lifts up your knee to and kind of moves you so you can lay on your back. He moves in between the middle of your legs; picking up your ankle and kissing it as he makes his way up. 

you take a slow deep breath in as Pietro asks, “is this what you wanted me to help you with? Hm? I wanna hear your voice, princess.” “Pietro…” you breathe out; he leaves purple bruises on your thighs. He starts kissing that area around the bruises briefly. 

 he stops and asks “do you forgive me?” while hovering over you; kissing your neck once again. “No.” You say. He takes that as a challenge as he says a smug “okay” with a smirk starting to grow on his face. “That's fine with me when we are done you're gonna forget why you were even mad at me.”

Before you can think of what to say back he attaches his mouth and you gasp. automatically your hands go to his hair which pushes him deeper into you. You knew he liked the feeling of your hands getting somewhat tangled in his hair. to be honest you liked it too because it gave you some sense of control.

 As your hand tangled in his hair you lifted your left leg up and put it on his shoulder. His tongue circled your clit before he fully took it in his mouth. Your back arched off the bed as you removed your hands from his hair and moved your right hand to the pillow under you and your left hand balled the cover where pietro once lied. Your eyes fell closed but they opened as soon as you felt pietro pulling away. You sit up on your elbows to see why he stopped. He reached up and pulled your hands back down to his hair. 

 When you finally reached your peak he put 2 fingers inside of you so you can ride out your high. You moved your hands from his hair to put them on his face as you gently brought him up to lean over you as you kissed him.

You reached down to pull his pajama pants down to return the favor but then he reached over y/n to check the time then looked back to you. This time leaning over you on his forearms so that all of his weight isn't crushing you- He said “you don't have to” “but i want to help” you said. He laid next to you and reached his arm around you to pull you closer. 

You can help at another time; now go to sleep he said as he kissed the side of your forehead. A few minutes later he turned his head towards you to find you asleep. He smiled to himself as he closed his eyes to fall asleep himself.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

word count: 781 words

(I'm open to criticism as long as you're nice about it since this is the first thing I've ever written, also feel free to request i'll probably be putting up the list of people ill write for later)

[erzsebetrosztoczy]

For your wounded heart

Pt.1

Pairing: Mizu x reader

Word count: ~2k

Notes: If there will be interest for it, I'll continue the story, because so far there isn't really a Mizu x reader going on lmfaoo but we'll seeeee

Ps.: Mizu's pronounce is he/him in this part

Here's Part 2

The molten gold disc of the sun slowly crept up the horizon, pouring gray onto the world from the darkness. It rose drowsily, languidly among the tall canopies, leaves lighting up as it projected onto them as thousands of thalers appeared next to the shining disk.

The songbirds ruffled their feathers — ready for the challenges of another day, and sang happily to their companions.

A strong draft escaped from under the wooden door, making the embers of the flickering fire dance before running through your covers.

The sudden cold bit into your skin; grabbing you from the realm of dreams, dragging you back to the world of the living with its icy fingers. You opened your eyes with a terrified sigh; waking up from the warm and caressing dream you pulled yourself under the covers.

Another day, another task ahead of you.

Wearly, you dressed up before trying to gather your belongings, which you would need shortly.

A scalpel, a knife, gloves and a deep basket soon graced your side as you set off into the awakening forest.

Three days ago, you were approached by one of the most influential merchants in town. His wife caught the chills-fever, which her priests had not been able to cure with any of their treatments. Realizing that needles, prayers and incense would not help here, the nobleman visited you the day before, when the noises of the market in the main square seemed to dull down, when you started packing your goods to go home.

It had been a long time since you were last offered such a sum - too long for your liking. Short of money - and because you would have faced the wrath of a powerful man if you refused - you accepted his offer to heal his spouse.

Early in the morning, when the rooster hadn't even crowed, you were already ready to go collect the ingredients for the potion.

The sharp autumn air crawled over your skin, penetrated your bones and breathed newfound strength into your heart. Listening to the soothing soft melody of the forest, you set off towards its thickets, hoping that you would find enough ingredients for your tonics today. Everything was ready to take care of the sick wife- all you had to do was get the hojicha flower, of which you had run out of stock a while ago.

Pulling your cloak tight around your shoulders, you stepped on the wet moss carpet, careful not to slip on the rutted ground. Soon the ground would start to freeze- you thought as you tried to remember which tree trunk you marked, where you should turn right or left to reach your usual harvesting location.

"If I want to have everything in the winter, I have to collect them in time..." You sighed, stepping over a taller ditch. "Maybe I should look at the market to buy seeds and-"

"To the best of my knowledge, you have to go the other way to the nearest market." A harsh, sharp voice spoke from your left.

You immediately screamed and if the cold didn't do it until now — the stranger who suddenly stumbled here had certainly frozen your blood. The pounding of your heart only made it worse as you spun backwards, trying to face the source of the sound. Your foot slipped and you fell to your knees, hitting a wet log while you turned your head trying to find the source of the sound.

After a while, three men appeared in front of you; one from the nearby bushes, while two crept out from behind the cover of the trees; like wild dogs lurking in wait for their prey.

"The lady must be lost, people can disappear quickly in the forest..." The other man nodded with a vile grin, rubbing his palms together while approaching you.

"Certainly, it is not recommended to walk alone in such remote places at the crack of dawn." The third man took over, turning his attention to the basket lying on the floor next to you. “It's better if we accompany you… so no one attacks you.”

"I didn't, I just-" You stammered, but your voice got stuck in your throat as the three strangers walked closer and closer. Their ragged and dirty clothes, their darkly glistening dreadful eyes ruled out that they were simple wanderers.

You ran into bandits on the road, alone, in the middle of the forest. Your heart was pounding in your throat and kept yelling for you to move, escape, run — otherwise you will take your last breath here forever.

Your eyes darted to your overturned basket – deep inside your knife was glinting in a cold light. If you could be fast enough to get it out of there...Fight for your life. You fight or you die.

But instincts were stronger than reason; the Gods opened a third way for you at that moment.

You pushed yourself away with your hands, your heels digging into the ground hard, almost scraping it up as you jumped up to run away like a chased deer. You could barely feel your legs, could barely breathe as you ran through the trees with all your might, jumping over bushes, rocks, and pits. With your heart in your throat, with the sound of the bandits' steps and shouts in your ears, you kept going forward, not even daring to look back.

Your ability to navigate had left you, you didn't even know if you were running towards or away from them, there was just the feeling that you still had to go, still run, still fight. If you stopped you were dead, if you fell you were dead, if they caught up you were dead.

A huge thorn bush appeared in front of you, too high and wide it would have been almost impossible to jump over it, to get around it; so for lack of a better option you tensed your muscles, pulled your neck in, closed your eyes and ran into the branches, shielding your face with your arms.

The pain that ignited in the darkness flashed through you as a hundred and a thousand spikes dug into your exposed skin; then you felt the ground open under your feet, suddenly you began to fall.

You didn't even have time to cry out when you hit the hard ground with your side.

Lying there injured and exhausted, with a bursting heart, you realized that it was all over.

You just sealed your faith.

Panting and choking from crying, you heard the rustling of the bushes behind you, then the trampling of feet.

"Here's the little slut" One of the men chuckled, but the cheering stopped almost immediately.

You did not dare to look up from the ground, did not dare to move; you were left lying on the ground trembling, awaiting death...

But nothing happened.

Another second, but there was only silence, no more footsteps, no giggles, no shouts.

Blinking away the dirt and blood, you looked from behind your lashes and then realized why you were still breathing.

The attention of the three thugs no longer plagued you. They turned almost motionless, to the left, watching ahead of them.

You followed their gaze and saw that you had fallen on a road. On a road where a fourth stranger was now standing in front of you.

A tall, lanky stranger in blue traveling clothes, the bamboo hat he wore pulled low over his face, obscuring his features.

A stranger with a sword in his hand.

Suddenly everything around you seemed to be silent; the chirping of the birds died away, the trees and twigs no longer creaked and cracked, as if the wind itself had stopped to watch the unfolding scene.

Not wanting to break the silence, you stared at the fourth stranger, holding your breath, wondering what would happen now.

Was that your savior ahead of you? Or was he just a wanderer who didn’t care what troubled others, who would only solve his own problems, regardless of if he made others ill-fated? Maybe you got out of the frying pan into the fire?

"There's nothing to see here." The nimblest bandit growled, a rusty knife in hand. "Everybody's minding their own business, right?"

"This matter belongs only to us and this woman, there is no need to cause difficulties for anyone." The largest one with a long mustache spoke slyly, the one closest to you clutched a heavy cudgel in his fist, his knuckles white from the force with which he gripped it.

The blue-clad stranger didn't answer immediately, instead tilting his head to the side, he peeked out from behind the brim of his hat, flashing his yellow-tinted glasses in the light.

"Looking at you, I suspect you are road thugs." The sword bearer spoke, his voice softer than you would have expected. "You rob those who come here." His words didn't seem like a question.

At this, the third man - the fox with a smile, who had a katana, spat down his side stepping forward in front of his companions.

"If you want good for yourself, you turn back or walk past us without another word." He snapped in his raspy voice, grabbing the hilt of his sword as the other two tensed with their weapons as well.

Barely able to handle the shaking and the hitching of your breath, you lifted your torso off the ground with challenge, turning to the blue-cloaked stranger desperately.

"Please…" Your voice trailed off as sobs broke from you. "Don't let me die, please!" Your voice cracked; hot tears washing away the mud and blood from your face. "Help me, please!"

The lanky stranger moved his arm back, revealing the hilt of his sword as he reached towards it with his right hand.

You inhaled through your teeth when you heard the deep clang of metal and clattering footsteps as the bandits charged towards him.

You dropped back down, pulling your knees to your chest as the battle began. Only daring to watch the scene from the cover of your arm.

The swordsman reached first the blue-clad savior, swinging an upward blow from the left, but his sword met another steel.

The man in the hat drew his sword from the sheath with the speed of a viper, breaking the first attack with almost no effort. Before the thug could react to it, the man was already flying to the ground, his legs entangled as the blue clothed one pushed him away to answer the next blow.

The rusty knife reached him second, and while his companion seized the stranger with his blade, he thrusted his knife towards your helper's neck. The cloaked man shoved the katana wielder away with his foot as he turned his torso to the side, the knife still flying towards him mid air.

Taking advantage of the movement, he turned to the right, placing one raised foot in front of the other, cutting across with his blade in front of him.

In a blink of an eye, red rain shot from the arm of the knife-wielding bandit - the sword almost cut his arm off. He staggered with a sharp wail, then fell to the ground, where he continued to shriek.

The one with a cudgel on the other hand did not attack yet, instead he stopped from a decent distance so the sword of the man in blue could not reach him, seemingly considering his next moves.

But this proved to be only a distraction when the first attacker reappeared, this time springing into action behind your savior's back.

The one in blue could hear this, as he turned to the side keeping an eye on both of his attackers, but then the largest started to move suddenly in order to attack at the same time with his other partner.

Seeing the impossible situation, you already had the mental image of the swordsman slashing your savior while the other beat him to death with the heavy club — you whimpered in terror, burying your face in your arms to shield yourself from the sight.

You heard a shout and the clang of steel meeting again, something heavy falling to the ground. A dull, more watery pounding - the cudgel! Bubbling, frothy snoring- a moan of agony and then silence.

You were next, you were sure of that.

Sharp cuts, bone-crushing blows and then slow, lingering death awaits you.

But there was no movement, not even a single grunt from the fight.

Panting, you raised your head to shorten your wait, but you did not find yourself facing the person you were waiting for.

You caught the gaze of the blue-cloaked stranger. You watched with a dry throat and roaring head as he stood over the three bloodied, dying bandits, his sword still clutched in his right hand.

The bamboo hat was no longer on his head, it probably fell off sometime during the fight when you weren't looking, and now was lying at his feet, waiting to be dusted off and put on again.

But instead, the stranger staggered, his knees buckling as he took two steps forward, finally slumping forward onto the ground, leaving you alone in the field of vigilance.

[renthony]

Just curious. How bad has Biden been at controlling COVID-19 in your view?

First: I already responded to a similar question you left on this post.

Second: Biden has been atrocious for COVID-19 safety and management. COVID-19 is still killing people, and our president has done a horribly insufficient job in mitigating that. "Better than the Republicans" is not the same thing as "good" or "effective." Biden's abysmal reaction to COVID-19 is part of why I'm so thrilled that the Uncommitted campaign for the Democratic primary has achieved some success. That particular campaign is focused on ceasefire in Palestine, but the People's CDC explained in a statement how Palestine is also very much a public health issue. We need to scare the bastard and actually do some of that "pushing him left" that people claimed they'd do after getting him elected. Though it seems to me like a lot of people just settled for, "okay, we got rid of Trump, we don't have to worry anymore."

Third: While I'm at it, people have to do more than vote. You have got to get involved. You have got to do more than participate in the presidential election once every four years. Join a union (may I recommend the IWW?), follow the guidance of The People's CDC, volunteer for your local Food Not Bombs, get involved in a tenants union like the Autonomous Tenants Union Network, read Riot Medicine, get trained in first aid and get involved in a street medic group, read up on your local politics and get involved on the small-scale, do something in addition to voting in the presidential election. Even if you're limited in how much you can personally participate, find the people who are talking about these issues and signal boost them, and share the information with others who may be more able to participate more. If you can tell people to go vote in the presidential election, you can also tell them to go do other things, too.

Now, with all of that out of the way, here are some links related to Biden's abysmal COVID-19 response:

During his 2020 campaign, Biden promised immediate $2K stimulus checks. Instead, he delivered $1,400. Sources: [x] [x] [x] [x] [x]

Velena Jones for NBC Bay Area: "‘Too expensive': Bay Area residents shocked over new COVID vaccine prices"

Reuters: "COVID vaccine manufacturers set list price between $120-$130 per dose"

Joseph Choi for The Hill: "Free COVID-19 test program to be suspended for now"

Disability activist Alice Wong writing for TeenVogue: "Covid Isn't Going Anywhere. Masking Up Could Save My Life," and the follow-up article, "COVID and the 2024 Election: What Biden and Democrats Owe High-Risk People."

Laura Weiss writing for The New Republic: "Democrats Can't Keep Ignoring Covid in 2024."

David Cohen and Adam Cancryn for Politico: "Biden on '60 Minutes': 'The Pandemic is Over.'"

Alex Skopic for Current Affairs: "COVID-19 is Still a Threat. So is Biden’s CDC."

Adam Cancryn for Politico: "Biden Appears to be Over Covid Protocols."

Paul Thornton for the Los Angeles Times: "Covid Still Rages, and the Biden Administration Isn't Helping."

Eric J. Topol for the Los Angeles Times: "The U.S. is facing the biggest COVID wave since Omicron. Why are we still playing make-believe?"

We should have free, universal testing. We should have free, universal vaccination. We should have free, universal treatment. We should have financial assistance for those of us who can't work outside the home. We should have mandated work-from-home for any job that can be done remotely. We should be emptying prisons and paying attention to the way disease and abuse proliferate inside their walls. We should have COVID-19 safety PSAs and government support for universal masking. We should have free distribution of N95s. We should have mandated masking in medical settings and public spaces. We should have a higher minimum wage. We should have healthcare reforms. We should have strong worker protections. We should have improved infrastructure. We should have a president who gives a single flying fuck about how many of us are dying.

And we have none of it.

But we sure seem to have money to keep dropping bombs, arming cops, terrorizing the vulnerable, and imprisoning innocent people to use for slave labor.

[marukrawler]

Bakugan it's one of the few franchises we're they didn't hesitate to show hate towards it's first main female lead (Runo)

The show never gives her the recognition she deserves minimizing her achivements and the same anime jokes about her body using Julie as a better example

And it's worse on season 2 were the joke still prevails and I think the anime treats her like if she isn't pretty like the other girls I think the anime never gives an indirect comment about her beauty like the other girls received.

Add to this, season 2 treated the og girls like jokes who can't defend themselves or even flandarized their true personalities (Runo and Alice) so they won't interfiere with the "real team"

And the cheery at the top, fandom treats her like a homewrecker in regards of dan/Shun or like the worst person on earth for being a teenage girl who tried to defend herself with what she knew and called out the bs of dan

The character deserved more respecto from the source...

Localization truly affected the perception the audience has on her...

Quite normal for any female lead...

Oh, Runo, Runo. My precious little summer child.

Runo is certainly one of the most underappreciated, misunderstood, and demonized characters in the show. Even I, a passionate Runo defender, had a preconceived notion that Runo was loud and abrasive before I had even watched the show properly (all thanks to my vague childhood memories.)

In universe, her brawling skills are looked down upon, her appearance is ridiculed, and she’s often made to feel as if she does more harm than good. In fandom spaces, she’s mischaracterized as being an unreasonable, stubborn, and argumentative loudmouth who’s always mean to Dan. Despite being one of the nicest and most considerate characters in the show, everyone, including the writers, seems to have it out for Runo in some way.

When it comes to Runo’s appearance, it’s hard not to feel as if the writers find some sort of twisted pleasure in constantly pointing out how Runo’s appeal as a girl falls short in comparison to her peers. The Misaki Café was all but deserted until Alice showed up and the customers (grown men, mind you) don’t hide how disappointed they are whenever Runo is left as the only waitress. This, of course, makes Runo feel inadequate since she’s the daughter of the owner and yet, she hasn’t contributed to the popularity of their restaurant.

Julie’s comments about Runo’s body can also be viewed as the writers further cementing that Runo is unappealing because of her physique and lack of traditional femininity. This is something that is proven repeatedly with every new waitress that’s more popular than Runo. Alice, Julie and Mira are all more physically developed and are shown to be desired by many boys, unlike Runo who constantly gets the short end of the stick and is made fun of.  

Hell, Runo can barely get a decent compliment from Dan on their first date! He’s made inappropriate comments about her weight on at least two occasions, and was checking out cute girls right in front of Runo, two episodes after she risked her life to see him. The show will never give her a fucking break.      

Also, the “Runo is a tomboy” thing just doesn’t make any sense. She wears skirt and dresses, her room is full of pink furniture, she owns a dollhouse, and she seems very interested in jewelry. And yet, the show (and the English dub more so) attempts to portray Runo as if she’s ‘not like the other girls’ when that’s the furthest from the truth.  

Now, on to the treatment of Runo, Alice, and Julie. It’s no secret that season 2 was horrendous when it came to those three, for the specific reason of convincing the audience that keeping the girls away from the plot was for the best. They were either not strong enough, not confident enough and/or they constantly screwed up somehow. Let’s see:

Alice was:

Tricked by Lync and inadvertently helped him get back to New Vestroia, thus enabling him to spy for and help out Spectra with his plans.

Scared of brawling even though her whole character arc in the previous season was about accepting that part of herself.

Made to feel weak for losing to Shadow and for allowing him to destroy her grandfather’s lab.

Julie was:

Written as overly flirty towards a boy that wasn’t her boyfriend, all to fuel a pointless one-episode love triangle. (Though, the repercussions of this episode’s writing on her character were immense.)

Made to feel guilty about how Billy inadvertently exposed the Brawlers’ location to the Vexos by visiting her.

Runo was:

Written as a lovesick fool who almost got herself trapped between dimensions trying to see Dan again. This had a ripple effect on the Resistance’s otherwise promising momentum, allowing the Vexos to go to Earth, the Resistance to get split up and captured and as mentioned previously, almost got Runo killed.

Willing to endanger herself again by leaving Marucho’s house so she could oblige Dan’s request of eating homemade curry, causing Mira to go after her and subsequently lose her Subterra energy to Mylene.

Runo lost all sense of reason whenever Dan was involved, Alice’s character development had seemingly regressed, and Julie immediately dropped the boyfriend that she had real feelings for. It’s frustrating to see this when they all had such great personal growth and meaningful storylines in the first season. Remember when Runo learned that she shouldn’t let the fear of losing her loved ones take control of her life? When Julie learned that she shouldn’t compare herself to others and that she doesn’t have to be great in order to matter? When Alice realized that she liked to battle and that it wasn’t something to feel ashamed of?

I understand that the narrative focus couldn't always be on Runo, Julie, and Alice. There are new characters introduced every season who deserve a chance to shine as individuals. But that doesn’t mean that our existing characters should get worse. Runo was more worried about not being near Dan 24/7 than she was about Tigress being captured! Masquerade was somehow still present inside Alice’s mind and telling her to fight despite previously disappearing to let Alice stand on her own two feet as a Darkus Battler! Julie is still used as a tool for instigating useless love triangle plots that accomplish nothing except for making it seem as if she jumps from guy to guy! This isn’t just limited to those three (Chan Lee, Elfin, Mira) and it’s just. infuriating as hell to see.

As for the fandom, Runo's character seems to garner mixed responses. Some hate her and some don't. She seems to be well liked on Tumblr but not as much on Reddit (go figure.) When it comes to Shundan fics, I skimmed through the majority listed on AO3 to see how they portrayed Runo. Here's what I found:

(I recommend clicking on the images for an easier reading experience)

Out of the 28 English-written Shundan fics listed on AO3, there were 5 fics that depicted Runo in a negative way, 10 fics where Runo was mentioned but her characterization didn't stand out in any particular way and the rest didn't mention Runo at all. There are Shundan fic writers who unfortunately portray Runo in a bad light to prop up Shun as "the better option" but it looks like they're in the minority.

I genuinely wouldn't be surprised if much of the hatred towards Runo stemmed from Dan fans being upset over how she constantly calls their golden boy out lol. Either that or because of the English dub, as you mentioned. I have previously talked about this and shown some examples here where Runo has completely different reactions to certain situations depending on the dub. It’s no wonder why we’re given the impression that Runo is unreasonable or mean or argumentative when this is how the English dub presents her to its western audience.

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Hello.

I'm not sure if this is related to autism at all, but I wanted to ask in case you had any advice or resources to offer. I struggle with having a really limited diet / being super picky. Especially when I'm in a crisis I seem to only have a couple foods I can eat. I take supplements but I still feel quite sick and not eating enough in a day has a bad effect on my mental health as well.

I don't intentionally skip meals but I feel entirely unable to eat anything that isn't the 2-3 foods I can handle at the moment. I feel like I'd rather skip the meal than force myself into eating something I feel almost ''afraid'' of.

The foods I can eat aren't really nutritious ( protein is something I find myself lacking in my diet, as well as fiber ), and can be a little bit pricey. I feel like I should be able to just ''get over'' my pickiness but i can't.

Hi there,

It sounds like you’re dealing with AFRID (avoidant food restrictive intake disorder). I have this too, and it makes trying/eating new foods very difficult and uncomfortable, especially foods that have changed. (Like a company starts/changes to using a certain ingredient instead of the original one). I found some sources about ARFID if you’re interested. One article states:

Avoidant/restrictive food intake disorder (ARFID) is a condition that causes you to limit the amount and type of food you eat. It isn’t the result of a distorted self-image or an attempt to lose body weight, which is common among other eating disorders.

ARFID can cause you to:

• Lose interest in eating.

• Feel anxious about the consequences of eating, like choking on food or vomiting.

• Avoid foods that have an unwanted color, taste, texture or smell.

Here are some more articles if you’re interested:

I hope this helps answer your question. Thank you for the inbox. I hope you have a wonderful day/night. ♥️

[animeyanderelover]

Can I have yandere sakamaki and mukami cast with older brother that are always gentle and treat them so nicely. But one day when they try to find him. one day, they saw their brother fighting somebody and that person saw them and tried to attack them. Reader decide to shield them using his body. In the end reader get badly injured but survive nonetheless.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, obsession, possessive behavior, clinginess, paranoia, blood, violence, torture, death

As long as you're safe...

Shu Sakamaki

🎵 Shu just wants to hang out with his brother, the person he's closest with but strangely enough he can't find you in the mansion. Now, Shu doesn't worry his head too much, it isn't unlikely for his brother to be outside though so he simply ventures the exterior of the Sakamaki property. His keen senses pick up surely enough some noises, under them the clearly recognizable voice of his brother and that's when he suspects that something is going on and he starts running to the source of the voice, slight panic dwelling up inside his chest. When he spots you, his heart drops as he realizes that you're fighting someone, a silver knife shining in their hand as they try to stab you. Your younger brother stops for a moment in his steps, tries to work out quickly how to help you but unfortunately he's spotted by the hunter who kicks you away and switches his target, storming to him. Knife about to plunge into his chest only for you to protectively hug him, the sharp metal embedding itself in your back over and over again. The taste of your blood pungent in the air as silent yet potent shock pulses through Shu's entire body, hands flying to your back only to pull back as if he's burnt himself, palms stained in dark red.

🎵 A piercing scream fills the air when Shu grabs the arm of them when they try to stab you again, breaking it in one swift motion and kicking the knife away as soon as they let it drop. Blue eyes dark with the desire to kill as he carefully lies you down on your stomach, gaze fixed on the vampire hunter. He wants to hurt them so badly but knows that he can't waist time since you need medical treatment. One hand is wrapped around their throat as he squeezes down, a sickening crack before they go limp in his hand and he drops them carelessly before quickly turning to you, half-conscious. You give him a half-hearted grin as you compliment him on his nice murder yet Shu has other worries, doing his best to maintain his fear as he helps you to stand up, hurrying back into the mansion with you so that your injuries can be treated. He's so disappointed and frustrated with himself as he blames himself. He could have done more. If he would have acted quicker, none of this would have happened. Why is he still so incapable after all those years? He isn't a child anymore. He finds himself hovering near you after that incident a lot more, especially during the healing process of your injuries.

Reiji Sakamaki

☕ You're late for an appointment with him, a study session which Reiji likes to do with you together as a way to boast his own intelligence and gain your compliments. You're always punctual so this is definitely odd, he doesn't believe that you'd just dismiss him so there must be a reason. That's how Reiji finds himself searching for you around the mansion, passive-aggressive when none of the other brothers can answer his question of where you are at the moment. That is the point where he starts to worry as he enters the surroundings of their estate. Catching you in the middle of a fight throws him off-guard as he eyes the dagger shimmering in the moonlight and the few scratches you already have. It's the fact that you're slightly injured that disturbs him, you've always been this untouchable individual in his eyes. How can you be hurt? It's in this frozen state that the hunter attacks him only for you to shield him, knife driving itself in your chest before you kick them away with brutal strength, surely rupturing a number of organs. When you turn around to ask Reiji if he's alright, his eyes can't remove themselves from the rapidly growing blood spot on your shirt.

☕ He's in total shock as essentially his belief of this strong and untouchable brother in his head is shattered seeing him wounded like this, holding himself together despite the lethal injury. When Reiji eventually snaps out of it, he has troubles holding back his dwelling panic as he pushes you back into the mansion into his own chambers, ordering you to lay down on his bed, unbotton your shirt and let him bandage and stitch your injury. You try to overplay it, tell him it's fine which only seems to make him snap more as he nearly yells at you to do as he says, hands slightly trembling as he collects everything he needs. If even one of the other brothers tries to peek inside his room, he shouts at them to leave, composure crumbling a he spends the next hour stitching the wound together. It's a shattering experience, seeing that you aren't indestructable, soon after the insecurities come as he realises that he's the one who is responsible for your injury, for the long scar that'll be a reminder of it for eternity. It throws him into a fit of despair. He searches outside for the hunter, half-alive at this point and staring with blury eyes up at Reiji. Oh, he will make sure that this human will pay dearly for this.

Ayato Sakamaki

🥇He's rushing through the mansion, a basketball in his hands as he wants to challenge you to yet another game in hopes of beating you but can't seem to find you. It's frustrating, where are you? It's so boring without you around after all, only you can provide him with a good challenge. He gets visibly more agitated the longer he can't find you, plans to brattily yell at you as soon as he has found you because you weren't where he wanted you to be. That all is wiped off his mind when he finally does find you, in the middle of a serious fight with a vampire hunter who has sneaked inside the compound of your property. Ayato acts unfortunately without thinking as he aggressively launches at the person who dares to try to take his brother away from him, underestimating their reflexes. A knife that was intended to pierce through his stomach is instead stuck in your abdomen as you spit moments later some blood out, some of it dropping on Ayato's face. A few seconds just pass by where he sits on the ground, staring at the soaked fabric of your clothes before he sees literally red, head pounding with wrath. How dare they? How dare they?!

🥇He isn't fully himself, lost in searing anger as he grabs the hunter by their throat and pushes them to the ground, kicking and throwing them angrily around as he keeps shouting at them, his whole body shaking with rage and sadistic blood lust. You stop him after a while, point out how the human is barely alive anymore and decide to end things quickly as you break their neck, knife still stuck in your stomach. He's confused and angry, not sure what to do now as he watches his older brother picking up the basketball, tossing it to him and jokingly telling him that he fears that he can't play with his younger brother now before staggering on his feet, causing Ayato to rush over and quickly support him. Fear is pumping through his veins as he yells at his brother what he is supposed to do now before being told what to do, dragging Reiji as a result out of his own room to assist the oldest sibling in removing the knife and stopping the blood loss quickly. A part of Ayato blames himself for what happened, the other one rejects those feelings of guilt as he decides to blame anyone else besides himself. His stupid brothers, that dead hunter and even his own brother who is supposed to be the strongest.

Kanato Sakamaki

🧸 Kanato is a walking time bomb without his brother around since he is co-dependent and relies on his brother a lot. You missed a tea party with him and Teddy so he's beyond livid, clutching the plushie tightly in his arms as he storms around the mansion in search of you. How could you just ditch him?! You're a terrible older brother, you're supposed to take care of him! No matter how had he searches, he can't find you though so that only worsens his mood and soon he starts screeching your name, anger and anxiety piling up inside of him as he can't find you. It's only when he goes into the garden that he spots you and shouts your name, noticing a moment later the stranger next to you who you're fighting against. His loud and obnoxious voice draws both yours and their attention to him and as you call Kanato's name out shocked, the vampire hunter instantly switches his targets, planning to attack him and leaving Kanato clutching his Teddy even tighter. You stop them before they can reach your younger brother, although only moments later their knife is driven into your abdomen, the attacker twisting it around and eliciting a painful hiss from you.

🧸 The scent of your blood tears Kanato out of his state of shock and suddenly he's grabbing the assaulter from behind by the neck, crying and yelling at them that they should never hurt his brother and that they should die. His older brother uses the distraction to pull the knife out and ram it into their own heart, killing them. Kanato is in a frenzy though, blood lust still there as he grabs the knife and continues to stab them, tears in his eyes as he screams for them to die and it isn't until his brother pulls him back that he stops, only to cling onto his blood-stained shirt and start crying hysterically as he tries to stop the bleeding by himself, coating himself in his brother's blood as a result. You're forced to walk back with him clinging to you like a little koala, hissing and crying the moment you try to pull him off you. He isn't of good help but you luckily you can cater to your wound all by yourself, leaving Kanato with you to avoid the boy entering a frenzy mental breakdown. Needless to say, your younger brother is half-distraught and half-angry with you, his presence suffocating from that day on as he demands you to stay from now on with him, threatens to hurt himself otherwise.

Laito Sakamaki

🎹 Laito may not be as permanently clingy as some other brothers are but he still likes hanging around with you. Usually he always has a good idea of where you are so it's a bit of a surprise for him to not know where you are as of now. Well, let's find his older brother then~ Initially it's a bit like a game of hide and seek for him as he wanders through the Sakamaki property in order to find you but the fun ends when his ears pick up the noises coming from the garden, sounding like a fight is going on as he recognizes your low growls you only use when you're serious. His expression falters as he now rushes to the location the sounds are coming from only to stumble into the middle of a fight between you and a vampire hunter who somehow has gotten inside their property. He isn't as hot-blooded as Ayato would be though, green eyes observing as he hides himself to find a good opening to join you in your fight and get rid of the pest. The hunter is experienced though and spots Laito, instantly storms towards him as he recognizes that he's weaker than the other vampire he's fighting against right now. Your calmness falters for a moment as you see them attacking Laito, letting your guard down for a moment.

🎹 His brother shields him in time but the price is a knife rammed in his ribcage, taking him off-guard as his older brother stumbles back, gritting his teeth as he clutches the fresh wound, blood seeping through his clothes. Eery silence befalls the surroundings for a few moments before Laito launches at the hunter, pushing him down and giving his older brother time to grab them and restrict their movements as they drop their knife for Laito to snatch it away, glaring at it with gleaming eyes as it's covered in his brother's blood. He hears how you break the bones in their limbs and swiftly decides to join in the fun for some revenge, grinning down at the human before waving his hand, wishing them farewell before he plunges the knife into their throat, watching the life slowly leaving them. He would have loved to prolong their suffering but has little time as he helps you quickly to rush back into the mansion. He may appear fine upon first glance but is still brimming with blood lust so you have to keep him calm enough or otherwise he might actually go on a murder spread. Let's just say that after this unpleasant encounter, he's sticking a lot more to you.

Subaru Sakamaki

⬜️Subaru is very aggressive but at the same time he's very obedient as he listens to whatever his brother tells him to do if it doesn't involve hurting him or leaving him. The oldest Sakamaki boy is like the lid containing Subaru's anger so he often searches for him when he's upset or mad about something and needs to calm down. So it's quite bad that the youngest one can't find you as he starts trashing around in the mansion, destroys vases and walls the longer he looks for you without success and his brothers avoid him on sight as they know better. Now, when he finds you outside the house as you dodge and attack a vampire hunter, he instantly wants to help and protect you and resorts to violence as he storms in to assault them, triggered by the silver dagger that they try to hurt you with. They're initially caught off-guard as he pushes them away with sheer strength alone, manage to come quickly back to their senses and come back for him, using quick attacks to make him lose balance shortly before striking down with the dagger. You cover him in the last moment as the hunter slashes down your back, the heavy scent of blood filling the air and making Subaru nauseous.

⬜️There are too much emotions at once mercilessly overwhelming him. Anger, shock, panic, guilt, shame and many more he can't even decipher. His body starts shaking as he temporarily stops thinking clearly but when he snaps out of this searing haze of rage, he's smashed the head of the person with his brutal strength. He pays no mind to them afterwards though, quickly rushes to help you up and half-carries you back inside the estate, shaking with fear and panic as he doesn't know what to do now. Instead he just does what he's used too, listening to you and following your instructions. He considers dragging Reiji to your room to help you but you insist that you can handle it all on your own with his hands. His stomach is turning and twisting when he helps you cleaning the wound, hot guilt flodding his veins since he blames himself for those injuries. He knows that he's the youngest and that you're the oldest but he thought that now that he's older that he'd be able to protect you at least a little bit. Why is he still acting like the small boy from back then? The feeling of helplessness haunts him, the invasive thought that he couldn't protect his mother back then nor you now.

Ruki Mukami

📘 Ruki is protective of his family, he's lost his family by blood already once and he won't let it happen again. His older brother is his idol and aspires Ruki til this day. He initially just wants to talk with his brother about something but when he can't find him in their house, he starts panicking a bit. He's just a tad bit controlling so the fact that he doesn't know where his brother is at the moment bothers him more than it should. Afte he couldn't find you in the mansion, he heads out into the garden surrounding the place and surely enough finds you there. It brings him no relief though when he realises that a vampire hunter is also there, fighting against you as you try to win the upper hand. Ruki stops in his tracks, trying to collect himself and help you but they notice him and dash to him, the silver knight glowing under the moonlight. Ruki is sure that he could have defended himself yet you throw yourself against the hunter to keep him away from your younger brother, earning a couple of stabs in your abdomen yet still managing to strip them off all their weapons and the rest is easy play as you twist their head and snap their neck, watch how they go limp under you.

📘 Ruki is tense, trembling slightly as his eyes take in the injuries you've endured for him. You try to be as nonchalant as possible as you ask him if he's fine, earning a throaty choke from him. How can you ask him this question in your condition?! Suddenly he's rushing to you, tries to stop the numerous bleeding spots, hands shaky. When his older brother attempts to calm him down, he nearly yells at him. How can he expect him to calm down?! You're quickly brought back and all of his other brothers start making a fuss when they see your injuries, somehow pressuring Ruki even more as he escorts you to his room to give you medical treatment. He's very close to hyperventilating in that moment, his chest heaving with each troubled breath he takes as he spends the next few hours cleaning the wounds and stitching the skin back together. As soon as he has made sure that his older brother will be alright, he collapses onto the ground as his legs shortly lose all strength. This event leaves a mark on him as Ruki grows paranoid all over again. He monitors his brother closely as his body heals from all the wounds, prays that there will be no scars left since it's entirely his fault. He's such a failure.

Kou Mukami

🎤 Kou has grown significantly clingy after he's been turned alongside with all of his brothers into a vampire and he's specifically often to find around the oldest Mukami brother. There's just such a feeling of security and safety there when he's around him and Kou is low-key addicted to this warm feeling, especially when he's having one of his nightmares. Somehow he can't find you currently though and he's pouting initially a bit because of it as he doesn't instantly assume the worst. At least until he has figured out that you are nowhere inside the mansion which does make him anxious. Why would you leave without telling him or any of his other brothers? He goes outside in order to continue searching for you, his attention drawn to the noise coming from somewhere deep inside the garden. When Kou finally finds you, he realises with growing fear why he couldn't find you as you're currently going head to head with a vampire hunter who has somehow found this place. When they suddenly come for him, you act without thinking as you throw yourself between him and them, sacrifice yourself as the knife is plunged in your chest.

🎤 Kou quickly thinks and reacts, grabs them and throws them down, hands engulfing their neck before swiftly twisting it, the adrenaline pumping through his veins as much as this sickening feeling does when he turns around to you as you pull the knife out of your chest. This looks really bad, he knows that despite you trying your best to downplay it to spare him from worrying yet that only makes it worse. Kou knows that he has to get you to Ruki as quickly as possible as he assists you to get up, careful to not worsen your pain nor the bleeding. There are tears in his eyes when he brings you back into the mansion, screams for Ruki to come as quickly as possible and refuses to leave your side the entire time, choking when he sees from close the wound you received in order to protect him. He doesn't want to stray away from his brother's side after that day at all as he feels paranoid if he's gone for more than five minutes. This accident is just sheer nightmare fuel and they're very frequent the next few weeks as he dreams that his older brother really died. He's a sobbing mess every time he awakes from such dreams, shouting for you in and outside his sleep.

Yuma Mukami

🌱Yuma is arguably the chillest younger brother from the Mukami boys even if he also is the one who took the longest to accept you as his older brother. He's quite excited that day since the vegetables he planted together with you are finally ripse so he wants harvest them together with you which is why he starts searching for you, furrowing his brows when he can't find you anywhere in the house. Honestly, where are you? You may be the oldest but sometimes you're really troublesome. A thought that bites him back when he finds you outside the mansion, struggling against a vampire hunter who wanted to sneak on the property of the Mukami brothers. There are a few cuts on your skin whenever they manage to scratch your skin slightly with their weapon made out of silver. Yuma quickly comes to your help and catches them off-guard by ripping them off you and throwing you away, helping you up and barking at you how you got yourself in this problem all of a sudden. You don't get much time to answer as the hunter launches at you two again, although they're now at a disadvantage with two Impure Vampires against one human. You two nearly overwhelm them.

🌱In their last moments they get desperate, charging at Yuma with newfound ferocity which shortly throws him off-guard. You realise what they plan to do and throw yourself in the last moment in front of him, shielding him as the knife insted pierces through your ribcage. With their weapon now stuck inside of you, they're defenseless as Yuma lifts them up by their head and mercilessly crushes their skull before throwing the corpse carelessly away, grabbing his older brother as he stumbles back, knife still stuck in his skin. Even if he tries to assure his younger brother that he can walk, his false claims fall on deaf ears as he's picked up and piggybacked by Yuma who worries back to inform Ruki of what has happened. He still knows that Ruki needs space to treat the injury so he just waits outside the room, trying to keep a straight face despite the nagging fear of the injury you received. He's back to scolding you for always getting in troubles even if you're the oldest one as soon as he knows that you'll make it, warns you that you'll get nothing from the vegetables he harvested all by himself. He's joking though, tells Ruki to prepare you a bigger plate to enjoy.

Azusa Mukami

🔪 Azusa is the clingiest from the brothers as he's heavily co-dependent to the point where he struggles to make decisions for himself when his older brother isn't with him. He just doesn't know how to properly function without his cherished brother and it's something that worries you as the oldest just as much as all other Mukamis. So when Azusa can't find you, he always starts searching for you. It's one of those days again as he walks around the property, the grip on his knife tightening the longer he can't find you as anxiety eats him away from the inside. Where are you? Please come soon, he's so anxious and lonely without you. He didn't anticipate stumbling upon the middle of a battle and when he sees you, he stills out of shock. Your eyes fall upon him and widen in shock as you shout at him to quickly get away and inform your other brothers what is going on. That's when the attacker decides to go for him though, underestimating him for looking weaker than you. You don't let him though, use your enhanced speed to get between Azusa and him, hissing when you feel how they drive their knife close into your stomach, although you manage to break their leg as a result.

🔪 You struggle with your wound but so do they with their broken leg. You do your best to push them away as they try to stab you again only for Azusa to appear behind them in a flash, a dangerous glint in his normally tired eyes as he uses his own knife to stab them over and over again in the back as you secure your hold on them to allow Azusa to do as he does. With a final stab in the back of their neck, they finally go limp in your hold and you quickly push them away from you, beathing through the pain as you clutch your wound. Azusa goes down on his knees, crawls to you and clutches the bloody fabric of your clothes as he tries to somehow stop the bleeding, tremors going visibly through his body. He doesn't separate from his brother even once when both of them come back into the mansion, not even when Ruki instantly takes their oldest brother to treat the wounds on his stomach. He falls down the hole of self-harming tendencies again as he always grabs his knife as soon as he isn't with his brother which leaves the rest of his brothers little choice but let him stay with you all the time, unable to take any distance. Especially when he wants to punish himself for being at fault for your wounds.

[hmshermitcraft]

The last memory the Hermits have got of Grian was him walking out of one their party after a yelling match with them, before they thought he was upset at them for something they didn't do, but after a couple of weeks of no contact and rethinking they started realising they were ignoring Grians needs for everyone else's needs. Remembering all the time, Grian tried to reach out to them but brushed him off for the others. They tried reaching out to Grian only to realise he blocked them all. They knew he had siblings but never got their phone numbers, so all their forms of communication have been severed.

Doc and Ren went grocery shopping one day to find Martyn there with Pearl and Jimmy, deciding to give it a try they walked over to talk with them, Pearl shot them death glares, while Jimmy and Martyn talked with the two about Grian and how he's been, and how he's been listening to sad breakup songs (I've been into the song You're Losing Me by taylor) as they were talking Grian comes around wearing one of the Hermits jacket and this sad look in his eyes.

Seeing Grian like this broke the two hearts, Ren rushes over to hug him and apologise for ignoring his needs while also asking him to come back.

Communication in such a big group isn't always easy. Grian made attempts to reach out, but he was never clear about them. The hermits couldn't tell anything was wrong - they responded to his cues but didn't realise he needed more. But they still should have been making time for him. Grian was always there when somebody needed a pick-me-up or help. Just because he doesn't ask for it obviously himself, doesn't mean he won't appreciate the help. It doesn't mean he doesn't need it, even.

And Grian knows his own behaviour wasn't perfect. To cut them all out like that was just making the communication issues he was having worse. But he was hurting, and he didn't want to deal with the source of that right now. He just wanted to stew on everything. Like a detox, giving himself time to process and sort through all of this emotions. He can't heal if he keeps re-opening the wound.

It's this that makes their reunion all the sweeter. Both Grian and the hermits have ideas for how they can stop this happening again. Grian deserves better treatment than that, and they hope it will be the same for any hermit in that position.

[j0kers-light]

Hi chaos! I hope you’re having a good day!

I saw your headcanons post for joker x reader who struggles with anemia & loved it so, so much! It’s always lovely when we get to see our favorite characters caring for us in little ways like that, especially when it comes to our daily struggles that often go largely ignored by society. I was wondering if you’d be willing to do a joker x f!reader with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome sometime? And as always, no pressure at all <3

— 🌹

Welcome my sweet 🌹anon!!

You ask, and I deliver! I had to do some extensive research with my mom to make sure I was accurate with this request! I learned so much via articles and short documentaries! Shoutout to my chronic pain sufferers! Chaos acknowledges you and I loves you!!

If anything doesn't sound right let me know 🌹 anon so I can correct it! I hope you enjoy! There are several sub-types of the disease but we'll focus on hEDS for this head canon 🖤✨

Since your disorder is rare and hereditary, there isn't any known treatment or any medical studies/research done to cure the illness. There isn't even a test done to diagnose its so vastly ignored! 😡😡

Society turns a blind eye to _EDS, simply chalking it up to hypermobility and being non-life threatening. WRONG.

hEDS is life threatening and sources fail to address the lifelong chronic pain and other debilitating issues that the rare disease causes. There are 13 sub types with their own crippling ailments.

Joker would hardly notice anything wrong until you go and hurt yourself, which is rather easy due to your fragile skin and joints.

Your body doesn't heal well after injury so bruises linger, scars are permanent, and dislocations are a common occurrence. Yay to pain. 🙃✨

Growing up, it was cool to show off your double joints and overly flexible body but as your age hit the double digits, you noticed the complications of your parlor tricks pretty quickly.

Muscle weakness was the first indicator followed by scarier issues like weak blood vessels and potential organ ruptures. Chronic pain is a reality that you have to endure since your body fails to function properly.

Life grinds to a halt when you have a flare up and Joker arches an eyebrow when you stay in bed for days at a time and work remotely.

Just moving is an impossible feat and your body punishes you for defying its demands for rest. You still have to live your life! Somehow.

Joker tries to crack jokes but you roll your eyes and ignore him. You’re just not in the mood.

He doesn't understand how you can go from practicing yoga in the sunroom to being bedridden in the same hour so he assumes you're faking being sick and that thought makes you cry.

Knowing that your lover believes that you are acting, hurts more than your aching joints and Joker immediately notices when your mental health begins to decline.

Now he's worried. When you can, you do as much as you're able, never knowing when your body will betray you and confine you to bed. Every moment is precious and Joker will never understand that.

Life returns back to "normal" but Joker demands answers. He's still in shock.

Weren't you on death's door just yesterday? Now you're returning to work, laughing and smiling, as if nothing is wrong. He doesn’t know what to think.

So he disappears to search the internet and after hours of clicking away, he's just as confused as when he started. (I feel you J..)

Joker refuses to believe there is nothing he can do to help his Bunny. This hEDS can't keep you down forever. Right? 👀

Why aren't there any studies, or any institutions pledging to find a cure for this?! Does he have to kidnap a doctor or two to get the ball rolling?

Joker remembers he does have a doctor on his payroll. He calls up Sarai and bombards her with the same questions he typed into Google.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY BUNNY?🧑‍💻

Sarai doesn't give him much else to go on except keeping you comfortable, well medicated if you take any, and to continue your physical therapy but not too much exercise as to aggravate your joints.

Great... so he's back to square one!

Joker hears you groan from the next room and goes to check on his poor Bunny. He would find a way to make you feel better himself.

You had dozed off for a long quick nap and woke up to the sound of something falling over in the bathroom.

It still hurt to move but at least it wasn’t agonizing anymore. This current pain level you could tolerate.

You were willing yourself to toss the covers back when Joker appeared in the doorway looking rather sheepish.

“Hey doll. Uhh are ya feeling up to move?” He scanned you over as if he could gauge your pain tolerance by sight. Your small smile gave him some hope.

“Mmm. I gotta get up and fix something to eat.” You were weak and probably dehydrated from lying in bed all day, but that was to be expected.

Joker watched you swing a leg over and rushed to your side. “I uh.. ran a bath. If ya want. A Reddit post mentioned ah.. hoT water being helpful.”

It didn’t dawn on you just what Joker was saying. All you heard was the latter part of his sentence. “You have a Reddit account?”

He smacked his lips while helping you slowly walk towards the en-suite bath. To your surprise, the bath was waiting for you with a rolling cart next to it, hopefully with something to snack on.

You were speechless. “J… you did all this for me?”

He looked away and you got the impression that he was blushing. He still had his clown makeup on so you couldn’t tell for sure.

“Thank you J. I mean it.” He helped you sit on the nearby wooden bench after you kissed his cheek. “Um. I can undress myself.. if you need to—ah! Okay! You’re seriously doing this.”

Joker started with your socks and worked his way up until not a single thread of fabric was left on your body. You felt so exposed sitting there nude while Joker dipped his hand into the bath water.

It was hot enough to be medicinal but not scalding. He snapped his fingers and dashed over to the storage area to grab your bag of epsom salt before dumping a few cups in.

You got to see a rare softer side of Joker hard at work. No one would believe you if you reported this. The Joker, Gotham City’s worst nightmare, was preparing you a bath with the greatest care.

“All-right-yyy ya ready pretty girl?” Joker’s voice snapped you out of your daydream. He playfully flicked some water at you to get your attention.

You couldn’t flinch away and huffed your displeasure.

“I couldn’t resist, Bunny. Now in ya go! Hold onto my shoulders, yeah?” He picked you up as if you were made of glass and gently lowered you into the bath. “Easy doll, I know it’s hot. Just relax.”

Joker shushed any whimpers you made and held you steady underneath the water. For the next few unbearable moments, Joker was right there whispering sweet nothings to calm you down.

Finally you relaxed with a deep sigh, “This is perfect.”

“Good. If ya want, you can rest a bit. I’ll keep you.. well you know.. from drowning. But ya do need to eat something first. Here.” He dried his hand off and fed you a [insert favorite snack].

You felt like royalty and Joker had no issue helping you adjust to the role. He fed you piece by piece, offering you sips of water in between while holding your hand and rubbing soothing circles on your skin with his thumb.

The contact warmed your heart. Joker may not know much about your medical condition, but he would always be there to support you.

You couldn’t ask for a better partner.

[sl-ut]

what's happening in gaza?

i know first hand that it's very difficult to fully understand what's going on in the world right now, especially coming from somewhere that is so different culturally, geographically, and historically as palestine. being online recently and seeing that people are being called zionists for simply asking questions about what's going on or not fully understanding bc, for the most part, it isn't your fault that you are so ignorant to the issue at hand. news sources based around the world and misinterpreting the situation in order to put palestine in bad lighting, so it's important that you all take some time and do your own individual research to look into what's going on, what your stance is, and what you can do to help. no one is asking you to donate your last $100 if you cannot afford to do so, but the acts of declaring your side and participating in boycotts are enough support to at least show the people of gaza that THEY ARE NOT ALONE.

below i've put together a few articles from different sources with different backgrounds, if you're interested, please read a few of these sources and educate yourselves on the situation. i've included sources to explain what's going on now, what's happened between israel and palestine in the past, the kinds of things that are happening in gaza, and why this is being treated as a genocide instead of a war. this is what i've been able to find, but if you discover some more pls feel free to reach out and i'll add them to my list!! everyone be safe and be kind to one another <3

What is Hamas and why is it fighting with Israel in Gaza (BBC)

Israel and Palestine: a complete guide to the crisis (The Guardian)

Timeline: A look into the long history of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict (ABC)

The history of conflict between Israel and Palestinian militants in Gaza (CBC)

A 'cultural genocide': Which of Gaza's heritage sites have been destroyed? (Al Jazeera)

Key takeaways from UN court's ruling on Israel's war in Gaza (AP News)

Israel-Palestine conflict: what is the two-state solution and what are the obstacles? (Reuters)

'Chilling effect': People expressing pro-Palestinian views censured, suspended from work and school (CBC) (this one is not directly about gaza, but shows the way that people are being punished just for supporting the people of palestine against this genocide)

ALSO PLS KEEP IN MIND THAT any acts of violence being committed by the hamas group is NOT a representation of the people of palestine, and the inhumane and monstrous treatment of these people absolutely is not deserved in return for the things being done by the hamas. regardless of your political stance, if you believe that the way that israel has treated palestinians in the past and continue to treat them in the present in deserved or justified in ANY WAY, pls unfollow and block me bc i want nothing to do with you.

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

what would megumi’s life have been if he was actually raised by the zenin from day one? like either gojo lost the custody battle or they were able to scoop him up before gojo ever reached them. i doubt they would want to keep tsumiki with them so she’s not there for little baby megs.

i think it would be really cool to see a zenin raised megumi interacting with his fellow classmates when he attends the school, not to mention the contrast between him and gojo. like on paper they both should have gotten the same treatment-being pampered and spoiled rotten but we also know that the zenin think that hurting little kids makes them stronger so it would be super interesting to see megumi realise that the stuff that happened to him wasn’t normal and for gojo to have a guilt trip bc he wasn’t able to help megumi when he needed someone to help him the most.

So I have a fanfic that I’ve half written (no idea if I’ll ever finish it—I’d love to, it’s just hard to find the time) about EXACTLY THAT that I talked about in this post for an ask game.

That being said, that entire thing happens from Tsumiki’s perspective, and I agree with you—I don’t think the Zenin would have ever actually taken her too. They don’t want her. She’s not Zenin. She’s not a sorcerer. They only bought Megumi. For the most part, Megumi is absent from that post, and you asked about Megumi. So this is what I think would happen on Megumi's side of that post I linked.

It comes down to two things:

1. He is never, ever happy with the Zenin.

2. He never lets go of his sister.

Megumi’s old enough to remember Tsumiki when the Zenin take him away. He's old enough to love her. And I think that Megumi loves very quietly, but he also loves very violently. He wouldn't let his sister hold his hand on the walk to school, but he would sacrifice himself for her future.

I think the Zenin took him from his sister, and I think he kicked and screamed and wasn't strong enough. I think they thought he would forget her eventually.

And then I think he bit most of the Zenin Clan.

At the end of the day, what Megumi wanted was the one thing the Zenin were not willing to give him. They were never like the Gojo clan, they were never going to pamper him, but there are a great many things in this world that they would give the Ten Shadows finally returned to them. But they would not give him a non-sorcerer, non-Zenin sister who would only be a weakness to him. They refused to let him have any contact with his sister, and that was the source of a lot of what soured.

Any Megumi that was taken in by the Zenin would have been taken in to Naobito's household directly. He would be announced as the one who finally inherited their most cherished technique, and he would be declared heir, and the Zenin would call him beloved for it.

They would keep him in a room that was large and empty and almost always dark, and he wouldn't be allowed to decide when he slept or woke, and the door would always be locked from the outside. They would give him a wardrobe of expensive clothes that he hated, and he would never get to pick which of them he wore.

Megumi would hate them. He would hate all of them.

He's just not the type to be comfortable with or enjoy the adoration of others--especially when it's not backed up by genuine love. Megumi is someone who very much values sincerity and depth to emotion--it's one of the reasons why he seems to respect Yuuji so much. Yuuji is a good person who follows through with what he says. He's not just going to talk about wanting to save people--he's there making the sacrifices as he does it.

The Zenin do not actually love him. And he knows it. He's experienced love before, and this isn't it.

They love the idea of him. The fantasy of him that lives in their heads. He has no interest in being their little god prince to contend with the Gojo's own. He knows who he is, and it's not this. He wants to go home. He wants to find his sister again. He doesn't want to do this anymore.

And I think that's a feeling Megumi never escape: he just didn't want to do this anymore.

Megumi would feel like a bug pinned beneath glass in the Zenin compound. He would constantly have people managing him--when he ate, what he ate, what he wore, when he slept, when he woke, when he trained, what he did. Having to become a jujutsu sorcerer signified an inherent loss of control, but it's nothing compared to the sheer objectification that he goes through when the Zenin have exclusive control over him.

He has no power of what clothes he wears. How his hair is styled. His schedule, his diet, the people he speaks too--he's suffocating and the Zenin are just increasing pressure on him.

I don't think Gojo ever thought that would be Megumi's life.

We’re gonna just have this imagining exist in the same world as the Tsumiki centric fic described in the linked post, and in that, the reason why Gojo never took him in was because he didn’t know Megumi had a sister. He showed up, saw the divine dogs, realized Megumi had the Ten Shadows, and decided he couldn’t do this. He was a mess. He was grieving Suguru and Haibara. Megumi looked just like the man who killed Riko, and apparently inherited the fucking Ten Shadows of all the goddamn things. The Zenin would lose their shit, and Gojo didn’t have the energy to fight and told himself he didn’t need to, because if Megumi was the Ten Shadows he’d be cared for like a prince with the Zenin. He turned around and left and spent the rest of his life with Megumi in the back of his mind, always nagging him with whether he made the right decision. It wasn’t until Maki got there and made a few worrisome references to Megumi's standard of living that he started to really worry that he had made the wrong one, and it wasn't until he found out about Tsumiki that he knew it was the wrong decision.

It's like this: The Zenin hurt Megumi in every world.

It would be bad no matter what, but it really gets bad because Megumi refuses to stop trying to get back to Tsumiki. She's his sister. They didn't have anyone or anything in this world, but they had each other, and he couldn't let these people just take her away. He’s feral about it. He refuses to fit the mold they keep trying to cram him in. He’s trying to scale the walls to escape. He’s increasingly desperate and angry and the Zenin are getting more and more frustrated the longer he fights them. He’s the heir to the clan, and he can’t stop trying to leave it to get back to some random girl who isn’t his real sister and isn’t someone they’ll ever allow him to have.

It gets bad.

They put him under increasingly strict levels of control. He’s constantly being trained, which means he's constantly being hurt. He’s not allowed to speak to anyone without the clan head’s approval. He is under absolutely constant guard after he manages to get over the wall and halfway to his old neighborhood before they catch him again. Tsumiki’s name is not allowed to be said aloud, or his old name. He forgets his name used to be Fushiguro, but he doesn’t forget Tsumiki. He doesn’t let himself.

I think it escalates until it hits a breaking point. Megumi becomes increasingly self-destructive and non-responsive to everything they try. They push him to extremes that start risking permanent damage.

I think Megumi would try to hurt himself, eventually.

He wouldn't be in his right mind. He's in the most shit situation possible. He's undergoing pretty severe abuse. He'd be at the end of his rope from the lack of control over his own life, and he'd be spiteful as hell towards the Zenin. And the only thing he has to hurt them with is himself.

As a character, Megumi has always considered his own sacrifice as an acceptable means to the end of getting back at someone. Mahoraga, intrinsically, requires him killing himself as a way of killing someone else. He'd hurt himself if it was the only way he had of hurting them.

Naobito would cover it up. He'd never, ever want the rest of the clan to find out that it happened. It was already bad enough that Megumi openly hated them--he couldn't have the Zenin seeing any vulnerability in what was meant to be their most powerful member. He'd put Megumi in total lockdown until he could make it all go away.

Then they'd make a deal.

A binding vow. Megumi could never purposefully hurt himself again. He could never again try to leverage his own safety against the clan.

And in exchange, Tsumiki would be taken care of.

The last time Megumi saw his sister, she was on a sinking ship. They were running out of food, money, options--he doesn't know if she even has food anymore. He doesn't know if she lost the apartment or if there's still running water.

They're not letting him see her. But they are letting him take care of her. He can sacrifice another piece of control over himself, and she'll never have to worry about money again. They'll pay for her housing, her food, her education, for her every desire for as long as she lives. The trust the Zenin set up for her will be a generous one, and it will be managed meticulously by a trustee who can make sure she'll be provided for until she's old and grey. And Naobito will vow to never hurt her or send someone else to hurt her. She'll be safe. She'll be taken care of.

Megumi makes the deal.

In the end, the deal's what sort of breaks him.

Because he doesn't promise to stop looking for her, but the Zenin manage to make it a part of the terms anyway. When they approach Tsumiki's mother with the offer to be her family's beneficiary, they include a requirement that Tsumiki be moved to another city entirely with no forwarding address given. She needs to be somewhere that Megumi can never find her again.

The Zenin keep the old apartment. They pay the rent every month. And the next time Megumi manages to make it off compound, they let him make it all the way there before dragging him home. They let him see the empty apartment with all its empty rooms.

Naobito wants him to know that Tsumiki's gone. He wants him to know that he'll never find her again.

He tries to run a few more times after that, but he never makes it very far. He doesn't have anywhere to go.

In the linked post, Megumi finds Tsumiki, just once. She's on a class trip. He's on one of his very few and far between allowed excursions off the compound grounds, and he sees her in the crowd and recognizes her, and he ducks away from his escort before anyone can stop him.

She remembers him. He didn't think she would do that.

She tries to save him. He didn't think she would do that either.

She still loves him. And he was always too afraid to hope she would do that.

It goes the same way it did the first time. There's a car, and the Zenin shove him in it. She's on the outside, and he's trapped within, and he wishes she didn't scream so loudly when it happens. The sound never seems to leave his dreams.

His sister still loves him. Naoya hits him in the back of the head. He wakes up, and it was like she was never there at all.

But they hit him harder, after. Like they're trying to beat the memory of her out of him. He has even less freedom, when he already had next to none at all.

But he still has a sister. He has a place to go that isn't here. He just has to figure out where that is.

He wouldn't really have anyone in the Zenin clan. Most people are just... weird about him. Naoya's violently abusive. Naobito's weird and violently abusive. Everyone wants him to be someone he's not.

Maki would be his favorite.

He doesn't care about whether she's got cursed energy--his sister didn't have any. And she's obviously strong. She doesn't treat him like a divine blessing or try to force him to act a certain way. I think they would have genuinely liked each other, but kept each other at a distance. They're both trapped in an abusive situation and keep themselves safe by keeping everyone else at arm's length.

He would have been happy to see her get out, though. He would have told her that she could have his spot as heir or head or whatever when she came back if she wanted it. She would have told him that if he ever got out... well, fuck it. They could be something then. Family. Whatever the fuck they weren't allowed to be here.

She would have told him she's sorry, and she would have meant it. The only one she she regretted more than Megumi was Maki. He would have told her not to be, that if she dared to be sorry for getting out that he would never forgive her, and he would have meant that too.

I think his relationship with his own techinque would be very different in a world where the Zenin raised him. In canon, his issue is that he doesn't view himself as someone who could be powerful or win in the long run, but in this world, all he ever hears is how powerful he is. Pride of the fucking Zenin. The most powerful of them in centuries. Meant to rival Gojo fucking Satoru himself.

I think his real issue would be controlling it.

His technique would be a source of negative associations for him. It's the reason why the Zenin took him away. Most of his interactions with it have involved getting beaten and hurt by either his family or a high-level curse they shoved him in front of. I think he'd have a lot more firepower under his belt than at the start of canon, but he'd have less of a fine tuned control over it.

He lost control over his own life because of his shadows. It think that would manifest in struggling to control his own shikigami at times. he's not as in-sync with them as he is in canon.

Eventually, he'd go to Jujutsu High. He would be the only one in the first year class at the beginning, just like in canon. And he'd finally meet Gojo Satoru, the man he's supposed to topple.

He looks at Megumi really goddamn weird.

He's... enthusiastic. About. Teaching. He guesses. And constantly asking prying questions about the Zenin, but not in the sort of way he'd expect from a rival. In the sort of way he'd expect from someone concerned about him. Which is stupid. And annoying. And weird. He keeps a distance from everyone. They've all heard about the Zenin clan heir, and he has no interest in having to fit or break whatever mold they've already cast him in. He's better off on his own.

Maki's there. She's cordial where other people can see it, and in private, she takes care of him in a way that's terrifyingly close to familial. He's not sure if he likes it. He's not Mai, and she's not Tsumiki, and they both want someone they can't have.

She isn't sorry she left. She is sorry she left him. He can hate her for it all he goddamn pleases.

Of course, if this is in the same world as the linked post, Megumi finds Tsumiki again. He finds her in Sendai.

He gets to keep her, this time.

Gojo Satoru, of all the goddamn people, intervenes and becomes his sister's benefactor. It's super fucking weird. He won't stop looking at Megumi strangely. He won't stop insisting that he didn't know he had a sister, like that matters.

That would sort of be the first time in a long time that life actually gets better for Megumi.

I think he would ask to go by Fushiguro again, once he asks Tsumiki what his name used to be. He'd ask her if she minded it, him taking the name again, and he'd ask the rest of the school to call him Fushiguro instead of Zenin.

Predictably enough, Naobito loses his shit when he finds out, but it's not nearly as big of a pain in the ass as he thinks it is? Because Gojo intervenes.

Gojo keeps intervening.

It drives Megumi nuts, because if anyone was supposed to hate him, it was this guy. If anyone was supposed to be against him, it was this guy. This is the guy he was supposed to rival. This is the guy who killed his shitheel bio dad.

Gojo's just... good to him. He keeps him safe. He keeps him safe from his own goddamn family, and that's--no one's ever done that. No one's ever protected him from the Zenin.

The Zenin try to remove him from the Tokyo campus and move him to Kyoto the second they find out Tsumiki's there, and Gojo just... says no. It causes an uproar, and he doesn't fucking budge. It's treading dangerously close to him kidnapping the Zenin clan heir, his refusal to let them remove him from the Tokyo campus, and he doesn't care about whatever problems it causes him.

Megumi's his student. He doesn't want to leave. So Gojo won't let them take him.

He personally goes to Kyoto and collects him, the one time the Zenin force him into a car and move him when Gojo's off on a mission. He tells the higher ups to get fucked. He changes Megumi's student I.D. to read Fushiguro, and he causes problems for Yaga and the assistants until they start calling him Fushiguro as well.

Megumi's different with the other students once his sister is there.

He's more connected with them. He becomes best friends with Kugisaki and Itadori. He gets closer with the second years. He's visibly happier, and it sort of casts in sharp contrast how unhappy he was before this.

And Gojo? Gojo's so goddamn sorry. He didn't know megumi had a sister.

The thing is that now that both Tsumiki and Megumi are on campus, it sort of haunts Gojo with what could have been. They're both fantastic kids--funny, smart, resourceful. And it's painful watching them try to rebuild what was taken from them. And it could have just. never happened. Because he could have saved them both. He could have been their family.

It's sort of painfully obvious the Zenin abused Megumi, and it fucking haunts him. He doesn't even have to read into Megumi's behavior--he sees it happen, right in front of him, with how they try to control him and push him around. He wants to kill them for it. He wants to hate himself for it. He could have saved Megumi and he just. He didn't.

He wishes he did.

[otherkinnews]

The effects of psilocybin on phantom limbs: an upcoming large study, and what otherkin have noticed

Orion Scribner posted on September 15, 2023:

Content warnings: This article talks about the use of psychoactive substances only as used in either medical treatment under the guidance of physicians, or in spiritual visionary experiences as entheogens. This article also talks about injuries and chronic pain, but it doesn't describe these in graphic detail. Be forewarned that some of the academic sources cited do go into graphic detail, if you choose to go read those next.

Summary: In California, a large study is looking for participants. Researchers want to see if psilocybin helps treat the participants' phantom limb pain. The study isn't about therians or otherkin. Many therians and otherkin experience phantom limbs, and some of them have made observations about how psilocybin and other psychoactive substances influence their phantom limbs. This article is an eight minute read, plus a bibliography.

A large study seeks participants who suffer phantom limb pain due to having had amputations

The Psychedelic Health and Research Initiative (PHRI) at the University of California, San Diego, is looking for participants for a study. They want adults who have had an amputation and who experience chronic phantom limb pain. The proposed will use MRI brain imaging to study the effects of a therapeutic dose of psilocybin on phantom pain. Psilocybin is the active ingredient in hallucinogenic mushrooms, which may have potential for addressing some forms of chronic pain that are difficult to treat. The $1.3 million study will be placebo-controlled and double-blind, and they will compensate participants $600. Specialized monitors will oversee each session, with doctors and rescue medications available. The pitch for the study doesn't say what dates it will take place, but a recruitment ad ran for it on August 31 in Amplitude, a news and lifestyle magazine for people who have had amputations. To learn more about the study or find how to contact its team by phone or email, see its pitch here, and Amplitude Magazine's ad here.

This proposed study doesn't say anything about otherkin and therians, and the recruitment ad only mentions that it's looking for people who experience phantom limbs due to having had amputations. Something intriguing is that that otherkin and therians have noticed that psilocybin and other psychoactive substances affect their own phantom sensations. The rest of my article will go into some background about all that.

Many sorts of people experience phantom limbs, of many kinds, for many reasons

When someone has sensations as though they have a body part that they do not physically have, the medical term for this is a phantom limb. It's best known in people who have had a limb amputated, but the phenomenon happens in many other cases. For example, it also occurs for people who have sensations of missing body parts other than limbs: ears, fingers, breasts, genitals, or internal organs (Langer et al, 2023; Dorpat, 1971; Ramachandran and McGeoch, 2007). The phenomenon also includes people who have sensations of body parts that they weren't born with (McGeoch and Ramachandran, 2012; Price, 2006). Some types of people who experience this are those who have had a stroke, who were born with incomplete limbs (McGeoch and Ramachandran, 2012), who are transgender (Ramachandran and McGeoch, 2008), or who elicit such experiences through experimental conditions (Casas et al, 2016). The medical term for a sensation of an extra limb is a supernumerary phantom limb (SPL) (Amoni et al, 2005).

Phantoms are underreported due to stigma. Most people who experience phantoms only talk to their doctors about having phantoms if they are very painful and they want help with that. The medical term for this is phantom limb pain (PLP). For people who do feel phantom pain, it can be different to treat than pain in a body part that is physically there. Experts are developing creative approaches for treating this pain, for example, mirror-box therapy (Imaizumi et al, 2017), virtual reality (Ambron et al, 2021), and psychedelic medicine.

What are therianthropes and otherkin?

Therianthropes (therians) and otherkin are people who have the long-term, integral experience and identity of being something other than human. For example, of being a wolf, elf, dragon, or Pokémon (Scribner, 2023; Sonne, 2021; Shepard, 2021). The explanations they give for why they are like this usually come from spirituality, psychology, or both (Kinmunity, 2016, pp. 19). Some common spiritual explanations are reincarnation or having been born with a nonhuman spirit, but not all therians and otherkin share these beliefs or hold them in similar ways (Lupa, 2007, pp. 27, 57-66). Though these examples of explanations are tied to spiritual beliefs, being an otherkin or therian isn't a religion and does not have religious or spiritual requirements. On the secular side, some explain themselves as having something about their mind or brain that's different than that of most people, not for spiritual reasons, but simply an undeniable part of their everyday lives (Lupa, pp. 80-86). Though this is an unusual way for a person to be, mental health experts say this isn't inherently a mental illness or delusion (Lupa, 2007, pp. 86, 261-262; Baker-Whitelaw, 2015).

Many therians and otherkin experience phantom limbs

Many therians and otherkin experience phantom limbs and phantom sensations of body parts that humans don't have, such as tails. When the therian community began in the 1990s, they contextualized their experiences with werewolf folklore. They developed jargon in which they refer to times of feeling nonhuman phantoms more vividly as phantom shapeshifting (House of Chimeras, 2021; Lupa, 2007, pp. 42-43, 126-127; Proctor, 2019, pp. 203-209). When the otherkin community mingled with the therian community in the 2000s, they adopted this shifting terminology as well.

Survey data suggests phantom sensations are prevalent among therians and otherkin. A large informal survey of otherkin and therians found that 72.1% of them experience nonhuman phantom limbs or phantom sensations (Kinmunity, 2016, p. 155). A team of scientists known as the International Anthropomorphic Research Project (IARP) or FurScience surveyed attendees of furry fandom conventions. The furry fandom is about enjoyment of fictional human-like animals in art, and its participants often roleplay as animal characters, but usually don't identify as animals. The IARP tended to find that 5% to 20% of furries identified as therians (Plante et al, p. 112). At AnthroCon 2015, the IARP found that phantoms were more prevalent among therians than other attendees of that convention. Of those therians who felt phantoms (percentage not specified in the IARP's public-facing materials), 70.4% of them tended to find it distressing (Plante et al, p. 116).

Otherkin and therian phantoms can feel different while influenced by psychoactive substances

Drugs are not a key aspect of therian and otherkin subcultures. Their communities rarely discuss the effects of substances in relationship to their therianthropy and otherkinship. Some otherkin and therians who have used mind-altering substances have noticed that these influence their phantom sensations.

The first source I've seen that describes this in significant depth is "Entheogens for Otherkin," an excellent presentation by Dove and Edge for verified adult attendees at Othercon 2022. A recording of the presentation is on Youtube. Though there isn't a written transcript of it, together with other attendees, I wrote five pages of notes on the presentation when I attended, which you can read in a section near the end of this document. Entheogens are psychoactive substances employed in culturally sanctioned visionary experiences in ritual and religious contexts. Othercon is a yearly virtual convention for otherkin, therians, and other sorts of alterhumans. Dove is a formally ordained Pagan priestess, an otherkin, therian, and host of a multiple system, with ten years of experience with entheogens. Her spouse Edge is a vampire and Catholic witch with twenty years of experience with entheogens. The panelists and attendees talked about harm reduction and safety. Some entheogens the panel talked about were psilocybin, ayahuasca, datura, and cannabis. Different entheogens each affect phantom sensations in their own characteristic ways, some having little effect on phantoms, and others making phantoms feel more vivid, or shifting, or developing entirely into an out-of-body experience. Entheogens may affect otherkin and therians’ phantoms in different ways from person to person.

About the writers: This article was written by Orion Scribner (they/them), with feedback from their boyfriend Page Shepard (he/they) and partner system House of Chimeras (they/them). The three& of them are historians and archivists for the communities of therians, otherkin, and other alterhumans.

References

Ambron, E., Buxbaum, L. J., Miller, A., Stoll, H., Kuchenbecker, K. J., & Coslett, H. B. (2021). Virtual Reality Treatment Displaying the Missing Leg Improves Phantom Limb Pain: A Small Clinical Trial. Neurorehabilitation and neural repair, 35(12), 1100–1111. https://doi.org/10.1177/15459683211054164

Amplitude Magazine (August 31, 2023). "Tripping the switch on PLP." Amplitude Magazine.https://livingwithamplitude.com/article/tripping-the-switch-on-plp/

Annoni, Blanke, Dieguez, Khateb, Landis, Lazeyras, Momjian-Mayor, Pegna, and Simon (March 20, 2009). “Seeing the phantom: A functional MRI study of a supernumerary phantom limb.” Annals of Neurology.https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19557858/

Baker-Whitelaw, Gavia (February 22, 2015). “Understanding the otherkin.” The Kernel. Archived March 18, 2015. https://web.archive.org/web/20150318110839/http://kernelmag.dailydot.com/issue-sections/features-issue-sections/11866/otherkin-tumblr-definition-pronouns/

Casas, D.M., G G Gentiletti, & A A Braidot. “Somatic and Movement Inductions Phantom Limb in Non-amputees.” Journal of Physics: Conference Series, Volume 705, Issue 1, (2016): 1-11 http://iopscience.iop.org/article/10.1088/1742-6596/705/1/012062/meta (accessed June 26 2016).

Dorpat, T. L. (1971). Phantom sensation of internal organs. Comprehensive psychiatry, 12(1), 27–35. https://doi.org/10.1016/0010-440x(71)90053-8 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/0010440X71900538?via%3Dihub

Dove and Edge (2022). "Entheogens for Otherkin." OtherCon. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YEh0mVcLo0

House of Chimeras. (November 19, 2021). A Timeline of the Therianthrope Community.https://houseofchimeras.neocities.org/Nonfiction-Articles

Imaizumi, S., Asai, T., & Koyama, S. (2017). Agency over Phantom Limb Enhanced by Short-Term Mirror Therapy. Frontiers in human neuroscience, 11, 483. https://doi.org/10.3389/fnhum.2017.00483

Kinmunity. "2016 Otherkin Community Survey." Kinmunity. 2016. Private collection.

Langer, S. J., Caso, T. J., & Gleichman, L. (2023). Examining the prevalence of trans phantoms among transgender, nonbinary and gender diverse individuals: An exploratory study. International journal of transgender health, 24(2), 225–233. https://doi.org/10.1080/26895269.2022.2164101https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37114107/

Lupa (2007). A Field Guide to Otherkin. Stafford, England: Immanion Press. https://www.worldcat.org/title/137242792

McGeoch, P., and Ramachandran, V. (2012). “The appearance of new phantom fingers post-amputation in a phocomelus.” Neurocase 18, no. 2, pp. 95-97. DOI: http://dx.doi.org/10.1080/13554794.2011.556128https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21598175/

Plante, Courtney N., Stephen Reysen, Sharon E. Roberts, and Kathleen C. Gerbasi (2016). "FurScience! A Summary of Five Years of Research from the International Anthropomorphic Research Project." FurScience. https://furscience.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/Fur-Science-Final-pdf-for-Website_2017_10_18.pdf

Price, E. H. (2006). A critical review of congenital phantom limb cases and a developmental theory for the basis of body image. Consciousness and cognition, 15(2), 310–322. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.concog.2005.07.003https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1053810005000917?via%3Dihub

Proctor, Devin (May 2019). On Being Non-Human: Otherkin Identification and Virtual Space. The George Washington University. https://search.proquest.com/openview/e156c24bf65c4efb0918a8db37433cce/

Psychedelics and Health Research Initiative (2023). "Research." UC San Diego. https://phri.ucsd.edu/research/

Ramachandran, V. S., & McGeoch, P. D. (2007). Occurrence of phantom genitalia after gender reassignment surgery. Medical hypotheses, 69(5), 1001–1003. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.mehy.2007.02.024https://linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S0306-9877(07)00181-8

Ramachandran, V.S. and Paul D. McGeoch. “Phantom Penises in Transsexuals: Evidence of an Innate Gender-Specific Body Image in the Brain,” Journal of Consciousness Studies, Volume 15, Number 1, (2008): pages 5-16, http://www.ingentaconnect.com/content/imp/jcs/2008/00000015/00000001/art00001 (accessed November 5 2015).

Scribner, Orion (April 13, 2023). “A Simple Introduction to Otherkin and Therianthropes: Version 2.4.7.” The Works of Orion Scribner. https://www.frameacloud.com/nonfiction

Shepard, Page. “The 2021 Nonhumanity & Body Modification/Decoration Survey Results Breakdown.” Three Dragons and a Dog. August 28, 2021. Accessed December 4, 2022. https://invisibleotherkin.neocities.org/files/BodyModification-DecorationSurveyResults.pdf

Sonne (2021). “Terms and definitions.” Project Shift. https://projectshift.therianthropy.info/terms-definitions-by-sonne

A note for commenters on this article:

The author of this article is a layperson who isn’t involved in the study, so if you have questions about the study, please contact the researchers running the study instead, here. In your comments on my blog post, please exercise caution if you discuss psychotropic substances. If you write about illegal practices, for example, obtaining drugs that are illegal in your region, myself and other moderators of this forum may delete your comment. This is in alignment with Dreamwidth's Terms of Service, which forbids material that is illegal under United States law (section XI, subsection 8) or in your own jurisdiction (section II, subsection 2).

(This article was originally posted by Orion Scribner on September 15, 2023 on the Otherkin News blog on Dreamwidth, where you can read and write comments.)