#and don't get me wrong I'm happy for everyone else. sincerely.

[imwritesometimes]

I wish having self respect and liking my own personality was enough unfortunately I am continuously afflicted with 'you don't have a romantic partner because you're hideous and therefore unworthy of life' disorder

[luveline]

I LOVE YOUR WRITING IT'S SO ASDFJKFTICDHBDIGDGXSJOHCBCFG

so I wanted to request Sirius x reader where the reader is on veritaserum and has a banter/ tongue in cheek sorta relationship with Sirius. And then when she's on the truth serum she has to hold back witty comebacks because when she opens her mouth all she keeps saying is how disgustingly cute Sirius looks when he smiles, and how she just wants to snog his face off PLEASE IF YOU CAN 👉👈 🥺

REMINDER: YOU'RE AMAZING AND I'M HAPPY AND PROUD OF YOUR SERVICE TO THE FANFIC COMMUNITY

thank you ♡ —you can't hide the truth from sirius, and he doesn't want to try. 1.3k

cw spiked drink

"Why would someone put veritaserum in the pimms?" you ask James meekly. 

"Shortcake, I'm really not sure. Don't get upset about it, alright? Remus is going to tear them all a new one." He squeezes you by the shoulders. "Don't worry, Jamie's here." 

"You're very handsome, but I don't fancy you. Much." 

James smiles. "Good to know, lovely. I don't fancy you much either. I'll assume you're saving yourself for our mutual dark-haired friend and I shan't be offended." 

You slap a hand over your mouth and shake your head, but the truth comes out muffled into your palm anyways. "I really like him," you say, eyes wide with terror, "I don't want anyone else. Oh, James! You're such a dick!" 

"Do you mean that, or are you just angry with me?" James asks, helping you out into the garden away from the party and your peers, who can't be trusted to leave you alone when you're set to tell them any secret they want. 

"Both!" 

"What's wrong?" Sirius asks. 

Your neck almost snaps as you look up. James swears, trying to save it as your body instinctively answers. "Someone's spiked our girl," James says extremely loudly to mask your more honest confession, "I'm worried I'm going to tell you I like you," you say. 

Sirius, sitting on a low garden wall with a packet of cigarettes in his hand, is puzzled. "What?" 

"Someone's put veritaserum in her drink. Maybe in the pitcher. I've brought her outside so she doesn't accidentally tell everyone she's in love with me."

Sirius grins. "Don't be daft, Prongs, she's clearly team Black. Aren't you, sweetheart?" 

"You're the prettiest of your trio," you say, sincerity like a blade at the back of your throat, aching, "I'm definitely on your team." 

James squeezes your shoulder and helps you into a garden chair, the metal cool against your back. "I'll forgive you because I know you can't help it, and because I know you're dying of embarrassment," he murmurs. 

"Thank you. I love you." 

"I love you too, shortcake," James says easily, kicking out a chair for Sirius and flopping into his beside you. "Aren't feeling ill, are you?" 

"Just terrified I'll say something too honest," you say, holding your breath between words. 

Sirius sits in the chair that's been kicked out for him with a cigarette held between his lips, unlit. He lift a his hips to pull a lighter from his back pocket and you flush with heat at the motion, wondering if you're a pervert for looking, for thinking, but lately your flirty banter has your heart doing front flips, and every time you see him you're zoning in on his hands, his arms, the slip of skin at his navel when he stretches, the low sound he makes when something pops. 

"Stop ogling me," he says without looking from his cigarette, the end glowing orange in the flame of his clipper. 

"I don't mean to," you say. 

James shifts uncomfortably. Everyone knows you like Sirius, maybe even Sirius, but he hasn't said a thing about it and you've stopped yourself (so far) from telling him. Any truth has been said under the guise of a joke. 

Sirius takes a short drag and holds the cigarette out and away from you, smoke curling in the cold autumnal night. "Shall I go help defend your honour? I assume that's where Remus is. Being spiked isn't funny." 

"I'd like it if you stayed here," you say. 

James laughs. Sirius leans forward a touch. "Then I'll stay here. Do you need something to drink?"

"My mouth is really dry," you say. 

Sirius sends a saccharine smile James' way. It's the look of an older brother used to getting his way, to which James sighs and grumbles, standing from his chair, "Don't ask her anything cruel," he says severely, kissing the top of your head quickly. "I'm serious." 

"I won't. I quite like her, in case you forgot. I've no interest in torturing her." 

You believe him. James departs with a pat, leaving you and Sirius alone at the garden table, still but for the little motion he does every now and then to fleck ash onto the floor. 

"You sure you're okay?" Sirius asks.

"I feel fine. Warm, but that's probably because you're smiling at me." 

He raises his eyebrows. "Maybe we should talk about something else. I really don't want to ask you anything too personal while you can't keep a secret. James gave me veritaserum once, when we were kids." 

"He did?" you ask. 

"Too much of it. I was sick, and I couldn't stop telling him how much I wished we were real brothers. Which he knows now, but at the time it was, you know, very sincere." 

"You and James are real brothers," you say. 

"I'm glad you can say that. It must be true," he says. "I'm lucky, even if he has tried to poison me." 

"James is lucky too. We all are." 

"Yeah?" he asks. He's about to continue, but your mouth does the choosing for you, and you cut him off. 

"I love knowing you, Sirius, I feel lucky to be your friend, and I–" You bite your tongue hard enough for tears to catch in your eyes immediately. 

Sirius' blasé fades, falls away slowly, like a moving cloud unveiling a slice of light, "Don't hurt yourself," he says, alarmed at your wincing. He drops his cigarette and smashes it with his heel, shuffling his chair closer to yours. 

"I just don't want to tell you something," you say, shaking your head. 

Sirius touches your hand. "Okay, I won't ask you any more questions. I'm sorry. Everyone's allowed their secrets, lovely, I didn't mean to make you answer me. I thought it would be easier to skirt around the issue." 

But it's a big feeling, and it's in everything you do. You really, really like him. If you can't be honest about that, maybe you can be honest about something else..

There's no shame in finding a handsome man handsome. And maybe you can convince him that that's all it is. "I just want to kiss you stupid, Black," you say, "like, kiss you until I can't feel my mouth anymore. You look like you know how to really kiss someone." 

Sirius laughs suddenly, startled. "I want to kiss you stupid, doll. You're a fucking dime piece," he says through laughter, "and that's the truth."

"You look really nice when you laugh," you further, wondering if this is the wrong thing to do. 

"You look beautiful when you laugh," he says. 

"Joking with you about stuff is the best part of my week." 

"It's the best part of mine. I wish we saw each other more often," he says. 

"Did you drink the pimms, too?" you ask. 

"No. I'm stone cold sober, sweetheart." Sirius looks behind you and you follow his gaze to the patio doors, where James and Remus are arguing good-naturedly, a tall pint glass filled literally to the rim with water in James' hand.

"Has he left you alone?" Remus asks, quick down the short step to defend you. "I love you, Sirius, but I don't trust you to not ask her embarrassing questions." 

"I'm starting to get offended. No, she hasn't told me anything embarrassing. Only that she wants to snog my lips off, but I knew that already." Sirius smiles at you dopily while his friends seize up. "And that's hardly embarrassing, because I want to do it to her first." 

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

I am so happy you're back and seem to be doing even a little bit better! We missed you!

I wanted to send a little message, so you can ignore it if it sours your mood or you don't feel like dealing with it, feel no pressure at all! It's just this blog has been a safe space and the community has been so welcoming that I figured I could vent really quick

You know when sometimes the brain just has a really shitty day, like when you draw something and it screams at you that it's trash even though there's nothing wrong with it? I've been having a rough time with it deciding to scream that comfort characters would cheat, probably as an 'You are so unlovable not even fictional characters would be loyal' bullshit. Now, logically, I know this makes -67 sense. But, I was wondering if you could just reassure that like, Sanji, Mihawk, Buggy, Shanks, Crocodile, Blablablablabla long list of One Piece characters you write for, would not cheat? I'm sorry, this sounds lame to even write out but I'm trying to get my brain to stop thinking that asking for help is 'pathetic' because it is not and it only applies that logic to me, never to anyone else.

I dunno man. Brains and bring human ate both though af.

I missed all of you as well. Really and sincerely. I have a tendency to go radio silent when I'm going through a difficult time and I hate it immensely, but hearing that I was missed to makes me all

And yes, oh gods, I know. My brain is frequently my worst enemy. Especially when I'm not writing. My anxiety starts working overtime and my creative drive becomes dedicated to coming up with problems that could potentially happen for me to worry about even more and it's an absolute bitch; or even when I am actively creating and a little voice insists that everything I make is stupid garbage.

This is still very much and always will be a safe space. It definitely is awful to feel that unworthy of love. Full disclosure, I've mentioned in passing before that I've been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder depressive type. My main issue is auditory hallucinations that like to insist that everyone I love and care about only tolerate me out of pity and secretly would rather I not be around, which leads to me isolating myself from people. Huge part of the reason I go silent when life decides to be a bitch. I know it's just as bad feeling that way about comfort characters, if not even worse, when we're supposed to have them to help us get through that kind of bullshit.

So let me provide a little drabble for the one comfort character I’m certain wouldn’t ever allow us to continue being so silly about our worthiness of love and affection, because we’re all worthy of such a basic human need. I may do more later, but one in particular jumped at the opportunity to provide this comfort, and I fear he may counter me with his dreaded puppy-dog-eyes should I even dare attempt to wait.

Good Enough

OPLA!Sanji x AFAB!Reader

Lil drabble thingy

SFW, Hurt/Comfort

Possible TRIGGER WARNINGS for depression, insecurity, self-worth

♫♬ Moonshine ♬♫ — The Fratellis (yes I’m STILL on my Fratellis BS leave me be)

"Never knowing is the most evil feeling, when every answer here is none too appealing"

Sanji had always been a flirt. You knew that from the moment you started working on the wait staff at Baratie. Your trust issues had made it a little difficult for you to open up around the young sous chef (and occasional waiter on the frequent occasion that Zeff kicked him out of the kitchen for insubordination), but it was his outgoing nature and perseverance that had ultimately won you over. He had a way of making you feel like you were the only girl in the world when you were together, doting upon you, all but worshipping the ground you walked on.

But when he was sent out to work the dining area, it always made you nervous. His innate charm, his handsome features—he was nearly always a hit with female customers. No matter how much you told yourself that he was only doing his job, there was always a nagging feeling that maybe there was more to it than that. Watching him interact with a table of pretty young women, who by their clothing and demeanor were obviously far more affluent and sophisticated than you, left you distracted in your own work.

Seeing how they giggled at everything he said, how they fluttered their eyelashes when he brought them their drinks.

How the pretty blonde at the table leaned so close to him while he pointed to something on the menu, close enough to brush her hand across his.

You managed to spill a tray of drinks all over yourself while you were watching, leading to a scolding from the front of house manager. You saw the table of girls from the corner of your eye, giggling at your clumsiness before you were sent off to clean yourself up and change your uniform.

No matter how much you told yourself you were being silly, there was nothing you could do to shake it. The doubts, the thoughts of how easily he could find someone better than you. You had your jaw clenched the entire time you were changing your shirt in the staff restroom, tossing the soiled one aside as you leaned against the sink in front of the mirror and forced yourself to take slow, level breaths.

You were still on the clock. You couldn’t break down. You had to get changed, had to get back to work, had to pretend everything was fine, if he found out you were being so stupid about this then he would definitely drop you like a bad habit, you had to compose yourself or—

Knock knock.

Your eyes darted to the bathroom door, your breath catching in your throat at the sound of the light knock.

“J—just a minute,” you forced out, flinching at the sound of your own voice breaking a little.

Stupid, you’re being stupid, stop it stop it stop it—

A brief silence followed your answer, a silence that seemed to stretch on for miles despite lasting only a few seconds. The familiar, gentle voice that answered after a moment made your hands clench around the porcelain of the sink.

“You alright, love?” You drew in a sharp breath, swallowing, clenching your eyes shut. Of course it was Sanji. You had almost hoped that the manager had come scold you for taking too long. That would have been easier to deal with right now. Your eyes darted to the locked doorknob as it rattled a little. “I heard—”

“I’m fine,” you said immediately, the strained quality of your own words as they met your ears making your hands tighten a little more on the edge of the sink. “I—I just tripped and spilled a few drinks, I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Are you sure you’re alright?” You gritted your teeth, laying your head back to stare up at the ceiling. Of course he wouldn’t let it go that easily. The doorknob rattled a little again, and you glanced at it as if it were a viper poised to strike out at you at any second.

Stupid, you’re being stupid, don’t—

“You sound—”

You reached out and turned the lock on the doorknob, and turned away from the door, crossing your arms over your half-buttoned shirt and stared down at your feet. After a long moment, you heard the door open behind you.

Evidently you didn’t look any less distressed than you felt. His quiet sigh met your ear as the door shut lightly and the lock turned. “Oh, love, it’s fine,” he said gently, his footfalls echoing quietly in the small bathroom, closing the short distance across the tile floor between the two of you. Your whole body tensed as he wrapped his arms around your waist from behind, resting his forehead over the crown of your hair with a quiet chuckle. “It’s only a few drinks, it could happen to anyone.”

You shook your head, your shoulders shaking a little. Stupid, it was so stupid, but the words were already leaving your mouth before you could stop them. “Oh, yeah, anyone.” You couldn’t stop. You couldn’t. He had a way of pulling all your insecurities to the surface that no one else did. You pulled your crossed arms tighter, staring down at the white floor tiles for a moment before shutting your eyes tightly, your voice shaking a little. “Especially a dumb screw-up like me—”

“Don’t do that.” His tone came out a little sharper with this, and your breath hitched audibly in your throat this time, your shoulders hunching as you clenched your eyes shut tighter, swallowing back the lump in your throat. As if to counter your stiff posture, he pulled his arms tighter around your waist, pulling you closer, his thumb rubbing lightly against your waist in a comforting manner. “Don’t, sweetheart. Please.”

The warmth of his embrace already had you relaxing a little. Your shoulders slumped, your body leaning back against him, but your eyes were still burning when you opened them to stare down at the toes of your shoes.

“Was it the manager?” he asked gently, shifting behind you to rest his chin on your shoulder. “If he was being an ass I’ll gladly kick his ass off the docks.” Your breath left your lungs in a slow, trembling sigh as you shook your head no, your gaze drifting down to his hand at your hip, still rubbing lightly against you, your lips curling into a fleeting smile at his offer. You knew you were being stupid, but… “Then what’s wrong, love?” he asked, his voice a soft, comforting murmur in your ear.

“I…” You drew in a deep breath, closing your eyes as he tilted his head so his cheek lay against your shoulder. “Y—you—“

You swallowed against the lump forming in your throat, drawing in a deep breath, trying and failing to steady the whirlwind of thoughts swirling through your mind, thoughts of how maybe this was all a lie, of how you weren’t anything more than a silly little fling to him, how you weren’t good enough, how easily you could be replaced.

You bit your lip, glancing down as his hand found yours, watching his fingers lace between your own…and the breath left you in a slow, resigned sigh.

“It’s stupid,” you said quietly.

“If it’s got you this upset, then it’s anything but stupid,” he countered, and you had to purse your lips tightly to keep them from curving into a small smile as you felt his press briefly against your cheek in a soft kiss. “And if it’s something I’ve done—”

“N—no, you haven’t—” But how quickly you shook your head, how your shoulders tensed, betrayed your worries. “I…I just…” You slowly relaxed once more as he squeezed you against him, his cheek nuzzling against your shoulder, his soft blonde hair tickling against your neck. Still unable to turn your head to meet his eyes, you bit the bullet and forced yourself to voice your worries. “You have beautiful women making goo-goo eyes at you all day,” you said, keeping your voice low in an attempt to keep it steady. “I—I don’t—I’m not—” You bit your lip, your heart racing as you clenched your eyes shut, cursing yourself internally as you felt the tickle of a tear leaving your eye to trail down one of your cheeks. “Y-you could have any girl you wanted. L—like that blonde that was hanging all over you while you were showing her the menu, or—or—”

“Oh, sweetheart…” You weren’t quite able to mask the small sob that hitched in your chest as Sanji loosened his embrace—only to gently place a hand on your hip, guiding you to turn around and face him, to pull you against his chest as you tried and failed to fight back tears. He gently shushed your quiet sobs and stammered apologies as he wrapped his arms around you fully, combing his fingers through your hair as he laid his head over yours. Your eyes remained clenched shut as you fought to control your breathing , as he pressed a tender, lingering kiss to your forehead.

Sanji lowered his head and nuzzled into your hair, holding you flush against him.

“I already have the girl I want. The perfect girl.” He pressed another tender kiss to your temple, murmuring against your skin, “I have her right here in my arms. And I hope,” he said, his tone turning a little playful as he shifted to rest his forehead against yours, “that I’ll still have her tonight after dinner shift is over.” He brushed your hair behind your ear, smiling as he tilted his head to meet your gaze, puling a small smile to your lips as your cheeks grew a little warmer. “So we can cuddle up together on the balcony…watch the stars…laugh at all the drunk idiots stumbling back to their boats…”

You could practically hear him smiling as a few soft giggles escaped you, as you finally leaned fully against him and returned his embrace, your arms wrapping around his torso as you buried your face against his chest.

“I’m sorry,” you sighed, relaxing against him. “I…I’m just…”

“I know, love.” The way he called you ‘love’ all but melted your heart now that you were calmed down, pulling a faint smile to your lips. “I know. You don’t have anything to be sorry for. And if it’s any consolation, I was in the middle of telling that self-righteous blonde bimbo how my sweet, adorable, beautiful girlfriend would wring her neck if she kept putting her hands on me—“ He chuckled as you whined in protest of his praise, tugging you closer and grinning, meeting your eyes without hesitation.

He lifted his hand to your face, his thumb brushing across your cheek, the warmth of his gaze holding yours.

“I—“

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK.

You both jolted in alarm, your heads turning in unison toward the sound of the pounding on the bathroom door. Before you could so much as glance at each other, a gruff voice spoke up from behind the door.

“We’re in the weeds, Eggplant!” Zeff called . “Get your scrawny ass to the kitchen! And bring your damned girlfriend, we need all the help we can get.”

A long moment of silence stretched between the two of you as you both stared at the closed bathroom door, before your gazes drifted slowly toward each other.

Before you were both giggling under your breath, as you buried your forehead against his chest, a broad smile spreading across your lips as you clung to him.

“I suppose we’ve been summoned,” said Sanji, pulling back from you only enough to gaze down at you, still smiling. “Shall we, then?”

[jongbross]

get you alone (sub!byun baekhyun x f!reader)

pairing: sub!byun baekhyun x f!reader word count: 3.5k genre: smuuut warnings: description of sexual activities, oral sex (female receiving), semi public sex, cum eating, handjob, teasing, swearing, sub!baekhyun, dom!reader, brat!baekhyun, baekhyun is a good boy, mentions of alcohol, mentions of superm (i miss my boys) a/n: i didn't beta read this, i hate this ending, i'm sad because i don't have a baekhyun for myself, but i'm also happy because i've been trying to write this idea for a long time now! this is an extra for kinktober, so i hope you all like it <3

the party was truly enjoyable. you had a smile on your face, a sincere one, while listening to the group chatting around you. jongin laughed hard at something mark said, hitting the youngest’s arm repeatedly. baekhyun caught on to the joke, not letting it die and making everyone laugh even more.

“it’s just like that! for real!”, taeyong said between laughs. 

you smiled to yourself at the sight of the six of them. superm was obviously a way sm found to put all of them to work even more than they already did, but the way they clicked was undeniable. the way baekhyun, taemin and jongin looked at the youngest ones made your heart warm, as you knew they saw themselves in those young eyes.

baekhyun took a moment to look at his members, like he was sharing the same thoughts as you. he grinned to himself, quickly looking down when he felt his cheeks burning. you remembered how excited - but also worried - he was when he became their leader, not sure if his experience in the field and being the oldest was enough to lead them. to say he wanted only the best for his personal friends and for the new kids was an underestimation, and anxiety ate him alive at that time.

every doubt he had faded away as time went by, as they recorded their album, their music videos, and even their own reality show. all the five of them, even taemin who despite being younger had more time in the industry, looked up at baekhyun and trusted him fully to take them on that journey. and for that, baekhyun was grateful.

“baby?”, you called him, catching his attention immediately and also receiving a few looks from his members. “can you get me another beer?”

you stretched your arm towards the cold metal bucket sitting on the tiny table in front of you. bottles were spread around it, all empty, but somehow the bucket was still full - probably someone from the bar reloaded it when you went to the bathroom.

“hm… don’t you think you drank too much already, bambi?”

“of course not, i only had three of them.”

“that’s more than enough to get you tipsy”, baekhyun smirked, pinching your cheek before turning his attention to his friends.

“that’s more than enough to get you in brat mode at me too, apparently”, you fired back, making ten choke on his drink.

if baekhyun thought he could pull that off just because he was with his friends, he was deadly wrong. silently, baekhyun licked his lips, reaching for a bottle of beer and giving it to you. jongin suddenly started laughing, finger pointed at his oldest friend.

“his ears are getting red!”, he said. “hyung, are you embarrassed?”

“why should i?”, your boyfriend shrugged like it was no big deal. “i’m just a gentleman. learn how to treat your girl right, guys: do what they ask you, they know better.”

“or else you’re called a brat”, taemin completed, laughing too.

baekhyun’s attempt to brush it off didn’t work, and you could see on his face that he was trying to come up with a joke to get himself out of it.

“you should see who’s the brat when we’re alone…”, he said with a smirk on his face, and you just couldn’t believe it.

really? he would try to sound like he had any type of upper hand on you now? five pairs of eyes fell on you, closely watching as you looked at baekhyun in disbelief.

“are you sure you wanna play this way?”, you asked him.

baekhyun slowly looked at you, lips pressed into a line. you shot up an eyebrow, smirking at him like a challenge. he blinked a few times, mouthing a “i’m sorry” before turning to his friends again. 

the disbelief was now on jongin’s face, who stared at you with wide eyes. mark, just like a mirror, did the same a few seconds afterwards (when he understood what had just happened).

“i can’t believe it… you made him shut up!”, jongin exclaimed, the guys around him trying their best not to laugh. “i’ve been trying to do that for years now!”

“you better quit, jongin ah. you are not her”, baekhyun said, also reaching for another beer.

“what’s the secret?”, taemin asked, much to baekhyun’s annoyance.

“oh…”, you smiled. “he just knows that only good boys end up in my bed.”

again, baekhyun licked his lips. the laughing and screaming from his members weren’t enough to make him not look at you, desperately trying not to smile. 

you winked at him, before looking at the boys and seeing both taeyong and mark blushing. 

because, truth was: baekhyun was all loud and energetic around people, making everyone laugh and being the life of the party anywhere he stepped his foot in. he could easily give off dom vibes - or maybe not even dom, just the one who had the final word on your relationship. but you knew better than that.

oh, you knew so much better than that.

baekhyun’s laugh echoed through the pleace, getting mixed to the other ones.

“she’s funny just like me”, he said, trying his best to not ruin his reputation as the loud, funny guy, the one that always had a witty reply on the tip of his tongue and didn’t know how to shut up; his reputation as their leader.

but both of you knew, deep down, that it was a lost cause now.

“yeah, yeah… right”, jongin rolled his eyes at his hyung.

conversation naturally started again, thanks to ten who could almost literally sense how tense baekhyun was beside him. the group went back to talk and joke and tell stories about their lives.

baekhyun did his best to keep his normal self, teasing his members and being loud, but although his lips carried the conversation, his mind was far away from that party. he could feel your hand on his thigh as you scrolled through your phone, which reminded him of your presence and the control you undeniably had over him; he could feel your soft breathes on his neck, head loosely rested on his shoulder.

not so long after, baekhyun gasped when he felt your nails caressing the inside of his thigh - such a mindless, innocent act, but that made him catch your attention by putting his hand on top of yours, eyes fixed on your lips.

“you wanna go home?”, he asked you.

you turned your attention to him, locking your phone with a click. resting your chin on baekhyun's shoulder, you pouted a little.

"actually i do, but i don't wanna make you leave", you confessed. "you should be with your members right now."

"what if i wanted to be with you instead?", he whispered. "only you."

at that, you smiled. you left your phone resting on top of your thighs so you could reach for baekhyun's cheek, caressing his soft skin and feeling your heart warm at how he leaned into your touch.

"but you don't wanna leave, do you?", you whispered back. baekhyun hesitantly shaked his head, humming a tiny 'no'. "how about i take you somewhere so i can give you some attention, and then you come back to hang out with the guys a little bit more before we head home?"

baekhyun immediately nodded, like an obedient puppy. you smiled again, pinching his cheek while telling him to come up with an excuse to his members. you got up and walked away, making sure baekhyun was paying attention to where you were going.

"guys, i…", he turned to his members. "um… i gotta go help (y/n) really quick with something. i'm gonna be right back."

he knew it wasn't the smartest excuse, he knew at least half of them would know what he meant - but the thing was, he didn't really care if they understood what he was about to do.

"yeah, sure, hyung", taeyong said like a good younger brother. "we'll be here waiting for you."

baekhyun got up as well, bowing to them as a way to say thank you. but as he turned around to leave, he heard taemin saying "just remember to use protection, hyung" and suddenly his ears were burning again.

(...)

knocking twice on the door, baekhyun heard your voice telling him to come in - so he did.

the office room was well lit with a long desk in the center of it and big, darkened windows all around it. it wasn't your first time sneaking around sm's building with baekhyun to find some time alone, so both of you knew that bit very well already. 

so baekhyun knew that, when big events were happening like that night, nobody used to go to that corridor; still, he took his time to lock the door and pull down the curtains that were hanging on top of it.

he turned around to you then, smiling as he looked at you. "look, they changed that vase", he commented, pointing at something behind you. 

"i noticed. the other one was prettier", you said, eyes never leaving him.

baekhyun got closer to you, hands already reaching for your waist, embracing your body once it was at his reach.

"but you didn’t call me here just to talk about vases, did you?"

you smiled. "what if i did?"

you wrapped your arms around baekhyun's neck, fingers caressing the back of it. he closed his eyes, humming in delight - just like a puppy.

"i'll gladly do anything you want."

"i know you will."

all of a sudden, resting your hands on his shoulders now, you pushed him back.

"take off your pants."

baekhyun raised his eyebrows. of course, it wouldn't be the first time you would have your way with baekhyun somewhere in public (even though you were alone), but still - it was always a surprise for him.

it's not like he didn't like it either. baekhyun came to like the idea of taking a little bit more of risk, having a little bit less of shame. it started one time, when he was really needy and didn't stop touching you, so you took him to the bathroom of the restaurant where you were having dinner with friends, having him on his knees so he could eat you out. he did everything you said, and as a reward, he came twice that night.

what you said to his members was real. baekhyun knew how to be a good boy - because he knew what the rewards were.

"here? again?"

"you wanted to be with me, right? only me?"

baekhyun nodded, fingers already resting on his belt.

"and you don't wanna go home?"

he denied, undoing both his belt and his zippers.

"so take it off. you can have both of it, baby."

baekhyun hated the shiver that ran down his spine at your words.

like the obedient boyfriend he was, he did what you said. he pushed his pants down to the middle of his thighs, hesitating just for a tiny second before doing the same with his boxers.

his dick wasn't fully hard yet, but it still was an amazing view, the way you could turn him on just by light touches and the right words.

you called him over, and with two small steps baekhyun was back in front of you, eyes desperately trying to read your expression, trying to see what your next move was. he gasped and jumped in surprise when you wrapped your hand around his member.

"shit…", he groaned when you started to pump him off.

"you like that, don't you?"

baekhyun nodded, resting his hands on the desk behind you, caging you between his arms.

"i don't know if you deserve to feel good, though."

at that, baekhyun looked at you, eyes shining like he was ready to beg you for something.

"i've been a good boy", he said with pouty lips. "i did what you asked me to".

"but i didn't like how you acted in front of your members. why did you have to be so bratty?"

baekhyun moaned, feeling you squeeze his dick. "i'm sorry, bambi".

"are you?", you tilted your head. "or did you do all that just to get me alone somewhere? because you knew i was gonna punish you?"

again, he moaned - and it was the perfect answer for your question. 

you started to pump him faster, delighted with the way he was leaking already, growing harder and harder inside your hand. baekhyun tried to thrust his hips to match your pace, but was quickly stopped by you circling his waist with your other arm, holding him still.

"don't."

he groaned. "babe, i-"

"i shouldn't even let you cum tonight, you know? i should send you back to your team with a hard cock and frustrated eyes", you chuckled to yourself. "what would they say, um?"

"please don't do that, bambi", he pleaded, hands resting on your hips now. "i was a good boy last night, wasn't i?"

you laughed, letting your thumb work on his tip now. "last night isn't tonight, baek."

he shut his eyes, biting his bottom lip when your thumb started to tease his slit.

"t-then let me make it up for you", he gasped. "please…"

"and how would you do that?"

baekhyun opened his eyes, moaning just at the sight of you smirking at him.

"i can make you cum too, you know i can", he said. "just use my tongue, it's yours anyway. let me taste you."

you licked your lips, looking at his own. the way you leaned in, it was supposed to be only a small peck, but baekhyun held your face in between his hands, trapping you and deepening the kiss as he put his tongue into your mouth.

for a second, you felt lightheaded. baekhyun was such a good kisser, he had such a way with his lips - in every way possible. he squeezed your hips, pulling you close to him and making you feel his member against your stomach.

"please", baekhyun whispered against your lips. "don't do me like that."

"on your knees", was the only thing you replied, letting go of his dick.

baekhyun didn’t even think about it, he just immediately got on his knees, fingers eager to curl your dress up and pull your underwear down. you stepped out of it, smiling to yourself when he just put it in his pocket to keep it - god only knows how many of your panties baekhyun had as part of his private collection now.

wasting no time, he pulled one of your legs to rest on his shoulder as he drank from you, tongue savoring your taste with a long lick. one of his hands curled around your thigh, while the other one quickly found his dick, pumping himself way faster than you were doing.

again, baekhyun was amazing with his lips. he knew how to use them, where to kiss, where to lick. plus, his cute but not so little button nose was just perfect to tease your clit as he devoured you, tongues exploring all of his favorite places and circling your entrance over and over again.

it was almost second nature to you already the way you grabbed him by his hair, holding him still and you grinded on his face. any other guy wouldn’t moan as loud as baekhyun did, nor dig their nails deeper on your skin, probably because no other guy could love being used by you like baekhyun did.

“you’re so good with your mouth, fuck…”, you moaned, looking down at baekhyun. it was a sight to see, the way he looked up at you while sucking on you, just to watch your reaction. the pleasure was great enough for you to almost, almost not notice the way he was pumping his cock.

with a little bit of roughness, you pulled his head back and away from your core. baekhyun’s chin was covered in your fluids, some even getting down his neck - he should probably think in a good excuse to tell his members.

“stop it”, you told him, but he only groaned. “i didn’t tell you to touch yourself. stop it.”

with a whine, baekhyun did as he was told, letting go of his hard member, now pressed against his clothed stomach, red and leaking.

“bambi…”, he whined.

“make me cum and then we’ll see what we do about you, babe.”

baekhyun nodded, not a single sign of his bratty attitude on sight. funny, right?

as you leaned back a little, using the desk behind you as leverage, baekhyun leaned forward again, attaching his lips to you and now using both his hands to hold your hips. 

“grind on my face, please”, he pleaded in a whisper.

and a truth maybe no other person knew besides baekhyun was that you were a sucker for him just as much as he was for you. there was something about whiny baekhyun, asking you - sometimes begging - to do something with him that always got under your skin, always made you feel wanted, desired, loved.

so you clenched around nothing, moving your hips just the way you knew baekhyun liked too. the friction created by the circling movements of his tongue on your core plus the way you humped on his face was more than enough to make both of you moan out loud.

you could only wish that, even though you knew there was no one outside that door, no soul in that building would be able to hear you two.

“oh my gosh, baek!”, you sighed when he teased your entrance, just the tip of his tongue working on it. “s-shit, i- yes, just like that!”

instead of entering you, baekhyun started to suck on you. it felt like he was trying to drown in your waters, absolutely not caring about what the consequences were.

“babe… b-babe, i’m gonna cum”, you moaned, not missing the way he pressed his face harder against you, nails scratching your hips. “you’re so good, baek… f-fuck, i’m gonna cum all over you.”

just your words was enough to get baekhyun panting, licking and sucking your clit over and over in anticipation, until he finally felt your reward on his tongue. your grip on his head loosened, but you couldn’t say the same about his grip on your body. to be honest, baekhyun held you even closer, trying to drink down every drop of what you had to offer him, of what you had to give.

“stop…”, you had to tell him, so he could let go of you; otherwise, baekhyun would stay there, eating you out again and again until you couldn’t cum anymore, just like he did once.

exhausted but satisfied, baekhyun rested his head against your thigh, eyes closed and face covered in you. he heard you chuckling, before he felt the way you softly caressed his hair, pushing his dark, damped locks away from his face.

“you did good”, you praised him.

“thank you”, and he placed a kiss on your thigh. “thank you so much.”

you whispered for him to get up. you didn’t want to see how long you two have spent away, not what his members would be thinking by now - i mean, they’re not stupid, but you know… the less they actually know, the better.

baekhyun got back on his feet with your help, groaning from how sore his knees were. it was only when he started to put up his pants that you saw, the wet, sticky stain on his stomach…

“baek… did you cum?”

it was straight out of a cartoon the way his ears got red, with his fingers slowly zipping up his pants, eyes staring at his feet.

“maybe…?”

the way you laughed was enough to make him look up at you, glaring at you through his eyelashes. “and now you’re gonna get back to your team with that?”

you pointed at his blouse. “what will they say?”

“ugh, i don’t care about that”, he groaned, hugging you by your waist. “if they could taste you, i bet they would cum untouched too.”

“but they can’t.”

“that’s right, they can’t”, he bit his lower lip. “because i’m the only one who can play with you, right?”

“yeah, well… more like i’m the only one who can play with you, mister.”

the way baekhyun laughed - that little, loud laugh, that resembled a young boy’s laugh - made you fall in love with him all over again.

“i don’t mind being played with if it’s by you”, he confessed, hiding his face on the crook of your neck. “in fact, i think i’m not done for the night… you should play with me some more when we get home.

and it was your time to laugh.

“you’re such a goner”, you commented.

“for this pussy? always.”

baekhyun didn’t even try to react when you smacked his arm for what he said - both of you knew it was the truth.

[valeriele3]

Kalim Al-Asim x Bullied!Fem reader

Warnings: Verbal bullying and not proofread (Please lmk if I missed smth)

Words: 669

Serious ver. | Crack ver.(You're here!)

"Y/N is such a bitch." - Random Student A

"I know right!" Random student B says.

"Oh right, have you heard? Apparently Y/N seduced multiple housewardens. Must be why she's so close to them. What a slut."

Random students A and B laugh.

"Hey! Take that back!"

"Huh? And who—” - RS.A

"O-Oh Kalim! Hey there! How's it going?" - RS.B

"Don't pretend like you weren't just talking bad about Y/N! Please take back what you said; none of them were true at all."

“I—” Student B gets cut off by Student A.

"Hm? Whatever could you mean by that, Kalim?"

"You called Y/N names."

"Names? Oh, that? I'm afraid we were simply saying the truth, though. Almost everyone agrees."

"Look, I'm not sure where you heard that, but Y/N is far from what you guys think."

"She's a hard-working, earnest, and sincere person."

"She never seduced anyone."

"She managed to form the connections and friendships she has by communicating with them, helping them, and just being herself."

"And that's why I love her."

You just got done with your potionology class and were walking towards the cafeteria.

You were about to turn the corner until you heard a familiar voice.

"-nd that's why I love her."

Kalim's voice.

Thud

'Ah, it seems that I really stand no chance'

'He already loves someone else.'

"Hm? Oh! Y/N!"

Panicking, you quickly run away, leaving behind your book that you accidentally dropped. "Hey, wait up! You dropped your book!" Kalim runs after you.

After a bit of running, Kalim eventually caught up to you.

He taps your back and says, "Hey, why'd you run away?"

Sniffle

"H-hey..Are you..Crying?"

"What's wrong?"

You stay silent.

After what felt like an eternity, a different voice spoke up.

"Kalim? Y/N? What are you guys standing in the middle of the corridor? You guys are blocking people's way."

You quickly hide your face in your hands.

Awkwardly, Kalim speaks up, "A-Ah, Jamil, can you please prepare us some food?"

"Mm..Alright. C'mon." Jamil leads the way to the Scarabia mirror.

After Jamil finishes preparing your guys' meals, he turns to leave the room.

Kalim mouths to Jamil, "Thank you."

"Just talk whatever it is out" he mouths back.

Creak

Shut

Kalim clears his throat. "Y/N. Can you tell me what's wrong?"

"'m tired..I hate this place..The bullying, the overblots, that irresponsible headmage, and my home being taken away from me. I'm tired, Kalim."

Upon hearing this, Kalim engulfs you in a hug.

He doesn't say anything. He just listens attentively.

It felt warm. Like a comfortable blanket embracing you and protecting you from the harsh reality.

After calming down a bit, you move away from the hug.

You felt tempted to lean back into his embrace, but that would be too selfish. It would be unfair to Kalim.

But little do you know that Kalim himself had to stop himself from wrapping you in his arms once again.

"Kalim, I hope you'll be happy with her."

"Her?"

"I mean, the person you love. Obviously, I heard you talking about it earlier." You chuckle, although it sounds strained.

"Hmm, well, I'm always happy with you!"

"Eh?" You pause.

'Did I hear that wrong..?'

"Ahah..I think I heard you wrong, Kalim."

"Heard what wrong? It's true! I'm always happy when I'm together with you!" He gives his signature bright smile that could rival even the sun itself.

'Me..Her..Happy..'

'Wait!'

"Y-you mean me?! You like, no, love me!?" You blush.

"Of course! Who else would I love?"

It was then that you noticed how his eyes seemed to shine so bright; he's looking at you only, all his attention on you, as if nothing else matters right now but you.

"Oh right! Let's eat before the food gets cold!"

"Yeah..!" You turn to the already cold food. 'Oh well, Jamil's food is the best, so I'm sure it still tastes good'

A while later..

"I didn't expect you to confess so bluntly."

"Hm? Wait, what?"

'..I just basically confessed twice. This is so embarrassing!' He blushes

.ೃ࿐Reblogs are highly appreciated! ^^

[queenshelby]

An Illicit Affair

Part 16: The Talk

Pairing: Cillian Murphy (46) x Reader (23)

Warning: Age-Gap, Taboo Relationship, Infidelity

When you arrived at his room however, you saw that Danielle had returned, waiting for Cillian to be discharged. It was evident to you that they had been arguing again and it appeared to be intensifying by the second.

You stood at the doorway, silently watching the two of them engage in a heated conversation. Their voices grew louder and more aggressive, and you could sense the tension radiating between them.

"You need to stop pulling that shit and see a fucking psychiatrist," Cillian snapped, glaring at Danielle. "You're destroying our family with your behavior," he growled.

"I am destroying our family?" she spat back. "Why don't you just admit that you're having an affair? Because your infidelity is really what is breaking us up," Danielle said, and even though she had never suspected you to be the one he was cheating on her with, she knew that there was someone else for real this time. And, honestly, she was furious.

"No," Cillian denied vehemently, his anger flaring up. "It's you who is making everyone miserable," he countered harshly, pointing at her. "If you weren't so damn manipulating and controlling then maybe we wouldn't be in this situation," he yelled, causing Danielle to shake her head in disbelief. 

"You never cared for me Cillian, so don't make it out to be my fault," she spoke up suddenly, staring daggers at Cillian. "I really think that you are the one who should see a psychiatrist not me. You clearly have issues" she snarled, her tone laced with venom.

 "Maybe you're right. Maybe I should go to therapy to figure out why I stayed with you for so long," he retorted bitterly, his voice trembling with rage.

"You aren't going to leave me Cillian. We both know that you can't," Danielle mused and it was at this moment that you ought to interrupt their conversation. 

"Excuse me," you said, stepping into the room confidently, catching their attention. "I have the discharge papers ready," you announced calmly, glancing between Cillian and Danielle.

"You can head home now," you added, approaching the couple while handing the documents to Cillian.

"Thank you, Y/N," Cillian replied gratefully, accepting the papers with a nod.

"Do you need help dressing?" you offered kindly, gesturing towards his clothes.

"No, I got it," Cillian assured you, starting to dress independently despite his weakened state. You turned your attention to Danielle, who remained silent during this exchange.

She seemed lost in thought, her eyes wandering aimlessly around the room. Her hands twisted nervously in her lap, betraying the turmoil inside her. You couldn't help but wonder what was going through her mind.

"Thank you Y/N," she eventually said, her voice sounding softer and more composed. "I hope we haven't taken up too much of your time," she added apologetically.

"Not at all," you replied cheerfully, smiling politely. "I'm happy to help," you assured her while watching Cillian getting dressed, putting on his jumper and jacket.

"When will you be heading back to Dublin?" you then asked them both, addressing the topic of Cillian's departure tactfully.

"I am hoping to return tomorrow or the day after," Cillian answered, slipping on his shoes effortlessly. "I have some commitments that I can't delay any longer," he explained, casting a fleeting glance at Danielle who appeared visibly frustrated.

"And I will be heading home tonight," she piped up brusquely, her tone clipped and curt. "It's my mother's birthday, but Cillian and her don't really get along," she admitted awkwardly, averting her gaze. 

"Alright, uhm, well... all the best," you told them sincerely, waving goodbye as they left the hospital together.

You stared at the door long after they had disappeared, a knot forming in your stomach. You couldn't shake off the uneasy feeling that something was terribly wrong. But you had no idea what or how to fix it. You decided to focus on your work instead and immersed yourself in your tasks.

The end of your shift soon rolled around, and you found yourself looking forward to some downtime with Lucy.

She was still busy studying for her exams, but promised to join you later for dinner.

You headed back to the student accommodation, ready to unwind as, suddenly, your phone rang and you weren't really surprised when you saw Cillian's number pop up on the screen.

You let the call ring out, knowing that you shouldn't speak to him right now, especially after witnessing his argument with Danielle.

However, the urge to reach out to him grew stronger and, when you reached your destination, you couldn't resist dialing his number. After all, what was the harm in checking up on him?

"Hey Cills," you greeted him warmly, sitting down on your bed and resting your feet as he picked up the phone. "Sorry I missed your call," you apologized, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

"Oh, it's alright," Cillian assured you lightly, his voice sounding calmer and more relaxed. "I figured you must be busy with work," he added, his tone friendly and nonchalant.

"You sound better," you remarked, genuinely relieved to hear his improved demeanor. "Are you feeling okay?" you quizzed him, your brows lifting.

"Yeah, I'm doing much better, thanks," Cillian replied appreciatively.

"I mean, I've had some time to rest and gather my thoughts," he added, letting out a light sigh. "And I was wondering if we could talk?" Cillian proposed tentatively, his voice trailing off uncertainly.

"Of course," you replied instantly, eagerly grasping the opportunity to reconnect with him. "What's on your mind?" you encouraged, shifting onto your elbows and propping up your body, eager to listen attentively.

"I would much rather discuss this in person, Y/N. It's a delicate matter but I feel as though I owe you an explanation," Cillian started cautiously, his voice softening. 

"Do you want me to come to your place?" you asked, glancing at the clock on your wall. It was early evening, and you knew that Lucy would be returning soon.

"Yes, if that works for you," Cillian said. "I am staying at the Green Street Apartment Complex. Unit 256,"

Cillian informed you, his voice steady and confident and, despite the circumstances, your heart skipped a beat at the prospect of seeing Cillian again so soon.

"I'll be there in about thirty minutes," you assured him, reaching for the charger cable hanging loosely from your nightstand.

"See you soon," Cillian bid farewell, his voice conveying a mix of anticipation and uncertainty.

After ending the call, you paced around your room nervously, wondering how you were going to break the news to Lucy. She was such a stickler for rules and deadlines, and she hated it when you kept things from her. You knew that she would not be pleased to learn that you were meeting Cillian, especially considering the circumstances and, when you told her about it after she arrived at home, she gave you yet another lecture about not getting involved with a married man. 

"Seriously, Y/N?" she groaned with exasperation, her brown eyes widening with disbelief. "Again?" she muttered under her breath, shaking her head dismissively.

"I just wanted to check up on him," you protested weakly, feeling a pang of guilt creeping up your spine. "He had a bad argument with Danielle earlier at the hospital and I can't get it out of my head," you confessed hesitantly, averting your gaze guiltily.

"They were fighting, Lucy, and it wasn't like normal marital disputes. Something feels off," you admitted candidly, running a clammy hand through your tangled hair.

"Then you need to stay clear," Lucy advised sternly, fixing you with a meaningful look. "Don't become entangled in their mess," she cautioned, gripping your arm tightly."

"I won't," you reassured her, forcing a weak smile. "Like I said, I just want to see him and make sure he is okay," you insisted, rising from the bed and grabbing your coat.

"Is this why we pulled their files? James mentioned something about domestic abuse," Lucy interjected, raising her eyebrows skeptically. "Because that would be yet another reason not to get involved," she advised carefully after you explained the situation to her.

"Jesus, no, Cillian does not hit Danielle. That's utter nonesense," you defended him earnestly, shrugging your shoulders slightly. 

"Are you sure about that?" Lucy asked skeptically, raising a quizzical eyebrow. "Because, personally, I would be cautious," she murmured, eyeing you carefully.

"I trust my instincts, and my gut tells me that Cillian is not capable of that," you retorted defensively, shoving your hands into the pockets of your jeans.

"Well, all right, but remember what James said," Lucy reminded you gently, offering an understanding smile. "I just don't want you to put yourself in danger," she pleaded, wrapping a protective arm around your shoulders.

"Please call me if you need me," she urged, her brown eyes full of concern.

"Will do," you smiled reassuringly, pulling your coat tighter as you left the apartment.

The chilly air hit you like a cold splash of water, sending a shiver down your spine. You hurried to the nearest bus stop, trying to shake off the uneasiness that had settled deep within your bones.

The familiar chatter of people surrounding you did little to ease your nerves. All you could think about was Cillian and the less-than-ideal situation surrounding you both. 

You hopped onto the bus, scanning the seats for an empty spot. Finding one near the window, you collapsed into it, clutching your bag tightly. Your fingers fidgeted against the worn leather straps. Thoughts of Cillian consumed your mind, clouding your judgment and stealing your focus.

You attempted to distract yourself by counting passing buildings, but your thoughts inevitably wandered back to him until, finally, the bus reached Green Street, and you leaped off the vehicle, sprinting toward the apartment complex.

Inside, you buzzed the apartment number and waited patiently for Cillian to open the door. He opened the door via the intercom and, inside, you took the elevator to the top floor. 

The door slid open and you felt a wave of apprehension wash over you. You didn't want to intrude, nor interfere with their lives, but there was something unsettling about the pair of them. Your intuition was whispering warnings, telling you to turn back, but you brushed away the anxious feelings, stepping forward bravely.

The door creaked open to reveal Cillian standing there, wearing a white shirt and dark pants. He looked tired, haggard even, but he was still handsome as ever. He led you inside, asking you to sit down on the couch.

As you sat down, you noticed that the apartment was impeccably clean, almost sterile in appearance. The furniture looked expensive, yet lacked warmth and personality. Everything was ordered and neat, with no sign of clutter or misplaced items. Even the kitchen was spotless, devoid of crumbs or dishes.

"Would you like something to drink?" Cillian asked, his voice strained. You declined politely, and he sat down across from you, folding his hands in his lap. The silence stretched between you, each of you seemingly caught up in your own thoughts.

"What is this place? Are you renting it?" you questioned Cillian, peering around the immaculate living space.

"No, I actually bought it a few days ago," Cillian responded, a hint of pride coloring his voice. "It's still kind of bland, but I just need a space to get away sometime," he explained, his gaze drifting towards the cityscape outside the windows.

"A getaway house? Sounds nice," you commented, shifting uncomfortably on the couch. "I bet it's also super convenient since Max lives in the same building," you joked, attempting to alleviate the tension.

"Yeah, that was Danielle's idea. I suppose she needs someone to keeps tabs on me when I am away for work," Cillian chuckled, his expression turning sour. 

"Anyway, I apologize for earlier," Cillian said sheepishly, his voice softening. "That whole thing with Danielle was extremely upsetting," he mumbled, his voice cracking slightly. "I didn't expect it to escalate like that," he admitted, his face reddening.

"It's okay," you assured him, leaning forward, kissing him briefly on the lips. It was more like a peck, a sentiment of some sort and Cillian exhaled deeply, his posture relaxing ever so slightly. "Thanks, Y/N," he said softly, reaching for your hand. 

Your fingers intertwined with his, and a surge of electricity coursed through you. You couldn't resist the temptation; you inched closer to him, allowing your bodies to touch. Cillian reacted instantly, his grip tightening around your hand.

"Y/N," he murmured, the sound of your name echoing in the otherwise quiet room. "I don't fucking know what to do," he whispered, his voice trembling as he squeezed your hand tighter.  "I'm just a mess," he sighed heavily, his eyes filling with sadness.

"Do you want to talk about it?" you asked Cillian gently, squeezing his hand reassuringly.

"I don't know where to begin Y/N," he sighed, his voice laden with despair. "Everything seems to be falling apart," he added miserably, staring into space.

"Start anywhere," you coaxed, your heart pounding in your chest. "You can tell me anything," you promised, your gaze locked on his.

Cillian inhaled deeply, gathering his thoughts. "Danielle and I have been struggling for years, ever since my career took off in a way neither of us had expected. She always hated the exposure and fame and she had never been very confident within herself. She has always been quite jealous and controlling but, about four or five years ago, when I wanted a break from our marriage, she started accusing me of being unfaithful to her, which is also when she started to pull these stunts," he started to explain, shaking his head sadly.

"What kind of stunts?" you asked cautiously, your heart sinking with every word he uttered.

"She hurts herself," Cillian whispered, his voice barely audible. "She deliberately inflicts injuries upon herself and blames it on others," he explained, his voice cracking slightly. "It began with small accidents, but it quickly escalated into more serious injuries," he revealed, wincing in disgust.

"I know it sounds crazy, but she's doing it on purpose to get my attention and to make me stay with her," Cillian confided, his eyes pleading for understanding.  "She even threatened me that, if I leave her, she would tell Max and the press that I am abusing her," he disclosed, his voice trembling slightly. "I resigned myself to this for ages and, with me being away all the time, it's not really that bad, but then I met you and things changed Y/N," he explained reluctantly. "Now I want more than the marriage I am trapped in," he told you, his eyes shining brightly with unspoken longing.

Though you hadn't known it before, the connection between you two was undeniable. It was more than just sexual and, just as Cillian leaned back, running a hand through his thick hair, obviously wrestling with his thoughts, he appeared troubled but determined.

"I am so sorry Y/N," he whispered, his gaze locked on yours. "I should never have gotten you involved in this mess but I felt as though you had a right to know the truth," he confessed, his voice trembling slightly.

You remained silent, absorbing everything he had shared. The gravity of the situation weighed heavily on your heart, and you couldn't find the words to respond. Instead, you reached out and cupped his cheek, caressing it tenderly.

"Thank you for trusting me enough to share this," you managed to say, your voice hushed and soft. "It all makes sense now and I don't even know what to say, Cillian," you continued, your eyes filled with compassion.

"You don't need to say anything, Y/N," Cillian replied gently, brushing a stray lock of hair behind your ear. "In fact, I don't want you to," he continued softly, his blue eyes burning into yours. "Just you being here makes me feel better," he confessed, his breath hot against your skin before pulling you closer, wrapping his arms around you.

You could feel his muscles tense up as he rested his chin on your shoulder. His breathing became heavier, and you could smell traces of his cologne. You held him tight, rubbing his back soothingly. 

"I will help you figure this out," you comforted him, pressing your forehead against his. "We'll take it step by step," you whispered, holding him close just as Cillian's grip tightening around you. "You are amazing, you know that?" he murmured, kissing your neck as the intimacy between you intensified, and you both fell deeper into each other's embrace.

"I know," you whispered, nestling your head into his shoulder. "And so are you, Cillian," you murmured appreciatively, enjoying the warmth of his embrace.

He sighed, taking a deep breath before releasing it slowly. "This is insane, isn't it?" he murmured, his voice trembling slightly. "My life is a complete disaster. My wife has gone crazy and here I am, falling in love with my son's ex-girlfriend," Cillian rambled, burying his face in your hair. 

To be continued...

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[ddejavvu]

Professor Hotch for your multi verse monday? please please please pretty please I'd DIE for Professor Hotch. Also my grades would do a swan dive but who even cares about that?

today is multiverse monday! send me any au you can think of :)

--

The door of his office creaks open when you knock on it and your breath hitches as you realize it was never actually closed. You feel like you're intruding, but you hear your professor's strong voice tell you to 'come in', and you step through the door.

Professor Hotchner is sitting behind his desk, his arm in a sling. It's jarring, but not as terrible as you'd expected when he'd taken a week off due to a 'firearm-related mishap'. The email had said nothing more, in fact, you're certain it couldn't have said any less, but you suppose you're just thankful he hadn't blown a hole in his chest.

"I read your email," You start, tinfoil-covered platter in hand, "And I wasn't sure if you were alright. It was, um," You struggle for the words, chuckling sheepishly, "It was a scary email to receive."

He lets a soft smile grace his tired features, a sight you don't normally get to see. "It was a scary email to write," He admits, "I did it in the back of an ambulance with my one good hand."

"Oh my god-" You can't stop yourself from reacting, but he lets out a deep chuckle at your indignance, so you don't bother beating yourself up for it. "A-Anyways, I baked you these. I guess they won't really help, but- but I hope you enjoy them."

You peel back the layer of foil to reveal a platter of brownies. Something in his face softens, and it plants delicate seeds in your chest that bloom into overzealous joy. Your professor is notorious for being stony-faced, too serious for his own good. But with his arm in a sling, dark circles beneath his eyes, and shiny eyes at a plate of brownies, you suspect he's just like everyone else.

"Thank you," He finds words after a moment, glancing back up at you with his striking brown eyes, "Really, Y/N, I appreciate this. A lot, this is.." His eyebrows raise and he exhales through a smile, "This is very sweet of you."

"Of course," You smile sincerely at him, emboldened by his reaction. He gestures to the chair across from him, sleek black armrests shining with the reflection of the overhead light.

"Would you like to sit for a while? I didn't know it before but I'm in the mood for something sweet." He clears off a stack of papers from the spot on his desk you take a seat at. You set the brownies there, and he produces a napkin from somewhere inside of his bag.

He has to use his injured arm, so it's a slow, careful movement. Without thinking you reach out and take it from him, spreading it out over the wood. He thanks you softly, and pulls two brownies from the platter.

"Here," He tears the napkin in two, pushing one of the brownies towards you, "You're welcome to join me."

"Oh, thank you!" You eagerly accept the treat, trying not to seem obvious about watching him for a reaction. The deep, guttural groan that comes from his throat strikes you with a bolt of lightning that goes straight down your spine. It has you shifting in your seat slightly, and you use the brownie to stuff your own mouth.

"These are fantastic," He mumbles, speaking politely around a bite. His massive hand covers his mouth so that you can't see him chewing, and you try not to stare at it. You think it would look similarly fantastic wrapped around your-

"My son is going to be very happy with you," He muses, mouth finally free of fudge. Your eyes widen and flit to a photo frame on his desk, a little boy with a backpack on grinning up at you. You coo, swallowing your own brownie bite.

"He's adorable," And you mean it, the boy is all toothy grin and rosy cheeks.

Professor Hotchner hums in agreement, "Brownies are his favorite."

"I hope he likes them, too." You conclude, sinking your teeth back into the brownie, "You can't go wrong with brownies."

--

The next time you sit down at your desk in class, there's a paper there. It's folded and stuck shut with a green sticker, heart-shaped. You'd have left it alone, considered it an accident, but your name is written in yellow crayon on the page. You peel it open curiously, and your heart melts at what you find.

Y/N, the card reads, in a child's handwriting.

Thank you so much for the brownees brownies. My daddy lets me have one every night after dinner. They are Very good. We think you should start a bakery. I will come Every day after school!

Thank you very much,

Jack Hotchner

One glance up at Professor Hotchner at the front of the classroom reveals him staring up at you, something nervous in his eyes. At your grin, though, his own blossoms, genuine and warm. You hold eye contact for a moment, possibly too long, and then someone breaks your line of sight with him. A student comes up to ask him something, and he's looking away in a daze. You tuck the letter safely into your bag, making a mental note to tell Professor Hotchner that he's got the cutest kid in the world, and that you'll gladly start a bakery if it means you'll see them every day.

[laithraihan]

I really don't care about whatever someone ships or doesn't & I do believe you that it's not meant shippy & I think that's fine, because it's fiction so you can make up a bond between whoever you like however you like. But that goes for everyone else alike.

Art will be interpreted as soon as you look at it not after digging for the artist's own opinion, so I can't say I'm surprised that people look at it and think it's shippy first. Sure, some were annoying about it I grant you that, but I think it's because it simply comes of hypocritical to act like a ship interpretation is nuts when the art simply does look like that on first glance.

The average MP100 viewer will not interpret a familial bond between these two characters who canonically barely interacted, but you did. (& more power to you) Maybe your average follower will not interpret a romantic implication in your artworks, but others will. (& more power to them)

I really don't think people lack parental love to see it shippy, I think people simply expect parental love between, well, a parent and their child. Not someone you personally declared to be a "weird uncle" to a girl he barely knows. I didn't even want good night kisses from my actual "weird uncle" as a kid idk man.

Again, I don't see the slightest issue with the platonic relationship you make up for them. I just also get where the romantic interpretations are coming from.

Your uncle/niece interpretation sincerely is farther removed from canon than ship interpretations are from your artworks.

Interesting message so I'll answer this genuinely.

To start off: I Never once implied that it was crazy that other people would interpret this as romantic at first glance. I quite literally said that I understood the confusion because these two barely interacted in canon. Which is why Im always happy to explain my intentions. Experiences vary so what one considers normal may not be normal to someone else: I'm very much aware of this but y'all clearly aren't.

When it gets to the point where people say "this artist drew that AND said it wasn't shipping even though we can obviously tell theyre delusional and in denial", that's where the problem is. I provide an explanation, that explanation gets ignored, people either answer "lmao just admit it" or they treat me as if I'm the worst person alive and they refuse to accept they must've been wrong about their interpretations. They proceed to openly "discuss" this (by just mocking me repeatedly, nothing constructive) in a public space where they think I can't see it almost as if they forget I'm an actual person who can come across these messages at any time.

What others ship or don't ship is none of my concern, I stay away from circles I dislike. But when people constantly attempt to force me into "admitting" I'm into something that I have zero interest in out of malicious intent, then naturally it'll annoy me.

I'm sure you didn't really mean to imply that I was merely outraged at the thought of someone interpreting this as romantic if they didnt know every single thing about my headcanons which is why I'm answering you sincerely. So please forgive me for assuming the ones who compared a peck on the cheek to some nonsense like "platonic breastfeeding" have never experienced any sort of familial love growing up 💜

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.172 New plan

Running around after four toddlers while chatting up our guests was quite the ordeal, and me and Sophia were beat. Dirty plates and glasses lined every surface, making me wonder who raised our friends, heh. The mess was too much to tackle in our state, so we left it to tend to in the morning. Sophia crashed while I got Desiree ready for bed. My mood tanked when I thought about how happy Mama would have been tonight, surrounded by all her grandchildren for the first time. I'm not sure what triggered it, but my mind drifted to this morning when I wondered about my life's trajectory. Before now, I'd been fine working this yoga thing until I figured out what my real passion is. But now I find myself unsettled. Desi is older now, so life can be more flexible. I can start working again, but do I want to? How long do I want to teach yoga? Do I want to teach yoga? Mama was right about me being good at it, but what do I think?

That time I fixed the sink and wondered about being naturally handy came to mind. Maybe instead of forcing myself to fulfill someone else's dream, I should take advantage of my privilege and figure out what I want. The money tree has blessed Sophia and me with the gift of time. I could be by Sophia's side the entire time we were trying to get pregnant. And I was still by her side through the birth and recovery. Without the need to run to a job every day, I have time to figure myself out and what I'd rather be doing with my life. Don't get me wrong. I still love yoga. And I sincerely wish everyone would learn and live less stressful lives. I don't mind teaching, but do I want to do it forever? Maybe when Less moves, I'll go get Mama's candle equipment and give it a whirl.

I put Desi down, and she seemed very hesitant about her new bed at first. Even though we only made minor changes, her room was different, and she noticed. We took out the changing table and put it in the other room. And, of course, the bed replaced the crib. It took her a minute to decide if she liked being so low to the ground, but eventually, she figured it was okay.

I tuck her in, tell her I love her, and watch her drift to sleep much quicker than I'd ever seen. All the activity must have wiped her out too. I turn out the lights and watch her for a moment. There's something calming about knowing your little ones are safe at rest. It's a beautiful thing. And so is she.

[heretherebedork]

Hi!

I think I upset you with my reblog and commentary, and I want to apologize. 

My commentary wasn't meant to be "you are WRONG and I am RIGHT". I just wanted to play in the same sandbox with the idea you presented, and I think the way I wrote came across as more absolute declarations instead of wanting to talk more about how Ming still has a long way to go to show that he's changed inside vs his actions and how we the audience interpret it so radically different based on our own ideas/experiences. I don't want to silence opinions or takes. The opinions are the fun part! It really was meant for fun fandom discussion! 

I sincerely apologize. I will not hijack another of your posts. 

"And then Tong gets kicked off a cliff." - Please let me say how much this is the most unifying statement we all agree on. 

I understand that and I do strongly believe that the fandom has conversations to be had and I know it wasn't meant to be how I read it but... yeah.

Thank you.

I'm not... I mean, man, how does a person phrase 'I'm not seriously upset but it bothered me in a way that I know it shouldn't have".

Ming does have a long way to go.

But, and I say this because I don't know how else to say it, your phrasing left no space for that growth. And that was what bothered me. Because you tags definitely implied something very different than the rest of the writing did. The post itself, to me, implied that Ming was entirely wrong and needed to leave Joe alone and that there was no growth or chance of growth. That Ming couldn't bring Joe joy or warmth.

I think the problem is that it's not that I want to shut down the idea of hijacking, that can be fun! But when the hijacking is entirely the opposite point of the post... it's a struggle for me.

And that's why I almost didn't respond. Like... I don't want to say 'don't ever do this!' I just want to say 'don't shut down what you're hijacking'.

Sorry.

But also thank you. Like, I get it. When you put it like you did here, I obviously have no arguments! Like, dear lord, Ming has so much growth to do and he's just started! But he has started. And taking all of his started growth and turning it into a negative is just... making his growth impossible and I've seen enough takes like that.

So anyway.

I'm not saying never hijack or don't talk or don't interact with me. I'm saying... if your entire point disagrees with my point entirely... that's time to make a new post! Because your point is better on it's own without mine.

(Honestly, it feels weird to say this, but your tags talking about your excitement about everyone's response and your post just being a declarative shut down of my happy post really did push me to respond. Because your tags and this both feel so positive and enjoyable and the post itself felt like it was just a refutation to my post.)

[sucantslay]

HONEYCOMB SUMMER // analysis

Ok, before getting into this, I'm warning y'all, I'm not good at analysis ( I did like 4-5 of them before, that it )

If anything wrong or you don't feel like that what it actually is, feel free to think differently.

This is some...most of my thoughts I pull out of my head then put it on here so... yeah, don't expect a "unable to communicate with other easily" to do much.

My English is a bit bad.

This analysis is long, like...HELL LONG. So pls do make some free time before reading.

Thank you for reading that! Now let's get into the real stuff, shall we?

Pls accept my sincere apologies, but before getting into the song, can we talk about the...the event story first?

The event that Honeycomb Summer came from is: Heat Haze ◆ Lingering Summer & Hot Limit

And after spending my dia like a rich ass kid just to unlock all the story ( I missed out the event ) and spend some time reading.

The story's mainly focus on Niki and Niki's past from when he first meets Rinne. But aside from that, it also highlights Rinne and Niki relationship.

LIKE, RINNE LITERALLY ASKS HIM FOR MARRIAGE. STOP- I CAN'T

And you maybe think, yeh, he was just joking around. No, no he's not. He did not joke that stuff around.

And I'm not telling you to believe that Rinne wants to marry Niki in a "marriage" way. I like you to know that Rinne's living a different life than other character and the one who is likely to understand it like him is Hiiro.

Who didn't get annoyed when Rinne called Aira his little "girlfriend".

The meaning of marriage is being viewed different here. It not the couple's rings, not the beautiful clothes nor was it about the wedding ceremony.

It's about the two getting to stay together legally, that their home is officially below to both and got admitted by everyone else, and that Rinne loves Niki in a way that he wishes to share the hardship with him.

Clue? IT'S EVERYWHERE in the event story and *talk with a shaky voice* Epilogue 4... Epilogue 4 shines the best out of it.

He, HE LITERALLY SAID: "I tried to tell him that if we got married, we would become family, so there was no need to worry about causing me any trouble. I also tried boosting his self-esteem by making him a popular idol."

"I'm just a hick, but I've done my best..."

Like, Rinne was trying so much to make Niki happy. But Niki's Niki...He's scared that he might cause Rinne trouble so he mostly stays out of it.

From what had happened to Niki dad ( His dad who often gets featured in TV programs got banned from TV stations and was forced to never appear on TV again / from Main story Episode 139 / )

So when trouble comes, Niki always hides it from others until it eventually solves itself or until Niki finds some solution to solve it.

It the same as in Hot Limit story, where Niki stayed: "I'm was afraid that if I became a criminal, I would cause trouble for my dad, who was finally getting back on his feet, and my mom, who supported him all the time."

And yet again in Epilogue 4: "Nahaha, But I don't want to cause trouble for people around me like my dad did before..."

And surprisingly, our song for today~ Honeycomb Summer is not just about Crazy:B, it's about NIKI! And what came into Niki life when he was young? Rinne! So Rinne had a big impact on his life, made this song also talks about Rinne in some way.

Ok, ok, first line, first line:

I think that Niki making fun of Rinne's shirt style, but then the next line went:

"I'm going to make another joke like that"(Rinne line)

And I was like, nah, that didn't click, it gonna be something else.

So, if we return to the story event, I was thinking, ok, so maybe this is about the old time more than the present.

The foolish-looking T-shirt is actually from Niki and he gave it to Rinne and after Rinne wears it on, Niki laughs at how it doesn't fit Rinne at all.

If you don't know, Rinne who ran away from his home at that time got nowhere to go, when he was lying dead on the side of the road, Niki accidentally walked by then decided to adopt him.

So maybe Niki gave him some of his T-shirts then felt how weird those T-shirt were.

"I'm going to make another joke like that"

So, consider the fact that Niki doesn't make that much of a joke in the story, he was trying to get close or wanted to make Rinne feel more comfortable by cracking up some weird joke that no one could laugh at. Since he don't usually do that, he's not that good at it, but still trying his best for the little confusing Rinne.

"I'm sorry I let my true feelings get in the way" (Niki line)

"I was just regretting it" (Rinne line)

Niki don't want to cause trouble for others, so "Sorry I let my true feelings get in the way" shows how much Niki wishes to hide himself in, hide what he desires the most because he is scared that "following his heart" may cause other people around him to stuck into his stuff and that might trouble them.

With that came the story event, the same day when Niki brought Rinne back to his home, Niki later on collapsed because he didn't eat properly, Rinne panicked, and ran out of the house, begging the neighbor for some food.

When Niki woke up, he found food, a lot of them. But when Rinne said that he "rod" them, Niki was dumbfounded, thought he really did such things until Niki asked the other and found out that Rinne was actually insincere about it.

Thinking that Rinne was a bad person until Niki got to know the whole story did he finally go soft on him. Realize that Rinne is a good person and feel the want to keep him around.

"I'm sorry for picking you up just because I hope that I'm not a bad person and left you there on the street, and now I'm regretting it. You deserve a place to live in. And maybe mine isn't the best, but this is all I have."

"With a shy look on your face. You're just trying to fool me" "Isn't that just pulling us apart? The distance between us" (Kohaku & HIMERU)

"(WHAT GOING ON?)"(All)

Remind you about the fact that Niki is quite aloof.

Don't really get along with other friends (did he even have any friend at that time?)

So having some stranger staying in his house is not a good thing for him. Both are having communication problems so who will be the first to open up now?

And with Rinne ruthless way of talking, it was hard for the inexperienced Niki to understand him without misunderstanding it.

But Niki still hold onto the kindness in Rinne heart, knowing that Rinne wasn't actually THAT MEAN. Though the way he talks is like he wants to push Niki away.

(Note: The translation in-game was like this: "In an attempt to get away with it, but that will only push us apart. And widen the distance between you and me." )

Niki was panicked: "What should I do? What should I say? How do I treat him in his needs? Food! Maybe Food! He liked my food so-!"

He didn't know what do to, and neither did Rinne.

Niki sometimes regretted letting him in, but at the same time, he felt relief for giving him a home and didn't let his body rot on the side of the street.

"I don't want to make a bad play"

(Rinne line)

"And don't want to be a bad actor"

(Rinne&HIMERU)

From these 2 lines, it not about Niki, this captures more of Rinne characteristics as we all know, he acts like a mean, harsh person but at heart, he just wants the best for everyone.

And he was trying to "play it cool" here, just like the time he asked for food from the neighbor for Niki. He displays himself as a flawless, perfect being but inside he's just as pathetic as everyone else.

He didn't want anyone to find out about this, not even Niki, who was the only person he could rely on.

What happen if Niki found out that he was faking it? He may be a monarch but he's nothing but a helpless human in the big city.

He's smart and is the best human being around, yet is all but the way he wants people to look at him. He can't help it, he was being raised to become a monarch, to be brave yet alone.

The king who stands alone, sees nothing but the darkness. Then got confused when a stranger that he couldn't push away came into his life.

Niki gave him food, gave him a place, he's not the king! He's a small little human being who loves idol and the new world that shine bright like the sun.

With what Niki gave him, Rinne want nothing more but happiness for Niki. ( This had been showed in the story event, like, dam...I'm in tear)

"NO MORE, SO HOT" (All)

(Note: This is the first line that brought up the heat. The summer heat, yes, is also an element in their story as Niki meets Rinne in the summer.)

"So why don't you just..." (Kohaku & Niki) "Take it off."(All)

There are 2 meanings in these lines:

Firstly, the real meaning. It is hot, and they want to take off their close. Like, literally. Because the word "nugi" in the second line "Nugi sutereba ii ya" is this "脱ぎ" and it alone means: "Take off your clothes".

Secondly, "take it off" also mean "become naked". And no, I'm not saying naked the other way, is the mental way. Being naked is being all out, no more hiding, be yourself, and telling the truth, never the lies. It may be embarrassing as much as you're naked in a physical way because us human don't always speak what we thinks.

And who hide their real self a lot? Rinne.

Niki may not always do as he likes, but he never acts highly to hide his true self. BUT Ya know who is? Rinne, Rinne, Rinne~!

"And reveal everything" (HIMERU line)

Now, I want you to imagine the summer heat. Like, you are lying in your room, trying to find every way to defeat this heat that burns you from top to bottom.

How do you feel? Madness drive, frustration hit. You just get all tired without even getting your body to do any hard work.

You're just a little mad burning meat, and at that moment you just F*CK IT! Then take it all out, and say: "Because it hot out here!"

So, this and the "nugi" line put together is about Rinne just admitting it all to Niki. Like, they be lying somewhere on the flood in the summer, can't get the fan to work then Rinne just starts blasting out all his frustration because he can't take it anymore.

It is not just the heat, is the timing, is the moment. When Rinne finally got to talk about it, before that, there was no one that actually listen to him in the way that he wanted to.

Hiiro is still young, he was raised to protect Rinne, so it is still hard for him to understand Rinne's words.

The people there can't really understand it either, they only care for his bravery, king-like version.

The only person that he can rely on is this stranger that had now shown strong impact on his life, as he feels comfortable enough to be with.

But at the end, Rinne just stops: "Oh sh^t, maybe I should stop, I'm talking too much about such things that may revealed my truth self, I should stop now before too late." Then laughed it off as if it was just all a joke: "Nah, that's just because I'm hot! It getting hotter in here, enough to drive me crazy!"

At every vents he ever tells Niki, he just ends it up with a: "Just joking." To the point that Niki thought when Rinne actually told the truth, he was joking all along.

"It'll all be over in an instant (SO HOT!)" (All) "Like a mirage" (Kohaku line) "That's (DIVE) why (LIVE!) I want it." (All)

"Unforgettable time" (Niki line)

"WITH YOU!" (All)

To Niki, all the honest that Rinne have been was never a bad things. Even if export all his lies he had ever told Niki, Niki has nothing more then joy and love for him.

He’s happy for Rinne to be who he really is, either a mighty monarch or just some random guy who living rent free in his house, Rinne is Rinne, to Niki, already knew who he’s truthly is, so when Rinne just vent all that out, Niki don’t hate it.

Niki was happy to be the one Rinne can relied on, his first friend, first partner, someone to keep him company ever since his parent gone abroad.

All that frustrating moments under the heat of summer turn into an enjoyable time that are hard to forget.

"It's not the time to play games"(Kohaku line)

"The sun was shining so badly" (HIMERU line)

"That made my head go crazy" (Niki line)

"How it is like that?" (Rinne line)

"WHAT'S GOING ON?" (All)

Once again, the heat is taking over. As Rinne started to get confused about how much did he keep sticking on to Niki and Niki also wonder about how much Rinne impact his life more and more.

It also feel like Niki is panicking through the lines, complain that it is getting way too hot, and can't no longer be patient with Rinne brutal ways of acting.

Just slit it out you dummy! I'm having enough with ya keep hiding your real emotions like that!

Even if you're dead by the heat yet you still wanna hide it in?

"What you want to say" (HIMERU line)

"If you don't have the courage." (Niki line) "You won't be able to say it." (HIMERU & Niki)

It seems like there are confessions that Niki or Rinne want to make to each other.

Niki want to tell Rinne how much he had made his life turn brighter than it should be. Keeping Niki company through the loneliness.

While Rinne also wants to tell Niki about how much he loves to be with Niki. The silly chef who left him nothing but love and joy.

But they are scared that the other can't seem to understand how much they feel just by saying: "I love you."

Is that enough to make Niki believe that he loves him?

Will Rinne continue to stay here if he finally finds a place of his own. ?

But if I don't tell them now, when will another change come by?

None of them have the courage, but still, they're trying to show each other by action.

Rinne made Niki an idol, so he could shine like the sun, and maybe he'll start to realize how much he matters to others.

Niki follows Rinne on his journey to become an idol because Niki is the only one who truly understands him. He was scared that people only see the bad part, and with that came Rinne's action of never wanting to back down or accept his true self, Niki wanted to be there to help him out.

"Toward the sea" (Rinne line)

"With momentum" (Kohaku & Rinne) "Let's jump into it" (All)

This is the moment when all that heat is gone away, and they finally grab the freedom they want.

They no longer suffer under the heat of summer, under the pressure made by their own mind.

The moment they stay on that stage, the moment Rinne's wishes come true.

"Unless you blame the hot summer (SO HOT)" (All) "Highest temperature doesn't mean anything" (All)

Niki realizes Rinne still had his problem keeping it secret, now trying to get him to slit it out.

This is not that summer day anymore, the fan isn't broken, and there is no other time better than this moment to talk about your problem, but if you decide to stay silent, I know you'll blame it on the heat of summer.

"Let’s enjoy ourselves without hesitation (NON STOP!)" (All)

Note: There is also another version of this line that is being translated like this: "Don't be afraid to have fun (NON STOP!)" (One are from youtube: Honeycomb Summer (YB) and another is on Tumblr: Honeycomb Summer (TB) )

Niki told Rinne to stop being stressed out and just go! Enjoy! Isn't this what you always wanted? What to be afraid about?

"In intervals way that surprise me and you. If we follow each other. Let's share more ( DIVE LIVE!)" (All)

Sorry, but, once again, I have to, I'VE TO PUT THE OTHER VERSION ON!

"Oh, a moment with you (So hot!) It’s so fleeting Let’s share more (Dive live!)"

Rinne was like, yeah, maybe you're right... there's nothing to be afraid of as long as you're by my side.

"Let’s blame it on the sweltering summer (Dive, Now!)' "We don’t need to be so considerate anymore" "Show it all off! / Just let it all out (Oh yeah!)" "It’s over in an instant (So hot!) I want to be with you" "It’s like piercing through the blue (Dive live!) An unforgettable moment(WITH YOU!)" (All)

There is no word needed. Just read these lines and you already know what going on.

Let's keep it short, Niki and Rinne want to be together in the summer. Even if it's hot like hell, even if they're going crazy. Rinne might say something silly again, and the person that Rinne wants them to listen to his ramble will always be Niki.

"Cause I’m Crazy Bee, that’s just my nature"

Cuz, Niki now in a team of crazy bastards, a team that doesn't hold back, so Niki himself has to be brave, change, and adapt to the new environment.

"A sweet memory, like a honeycomb" "It’s okay to be greedy"

Niki wants to be with Rinne and the rest of Crazy:B but he scared that he might cause them trouble, Rinne was there, tells him that it ok, if any trouble, just let me and the others know, maybe we can lean you a hand.

"Let’s take it all with us" "Come here!"

Come here! Stay together, no boys got left out!

That ITTTTTTTTT, THANK YOU FOR READINGGGGG!

Also, here are some screenshots of the event that I want to share with you! Really worth my dia after all:

That it~ That all~ RinNiki~ Thank you for coming and reading this long ass post.

It's a funny coincidence that I'm writing this at noon, IT HOT AS HELL HERE! The fan just not fanning so it BURN. But since I won't have enough time if I start writing this post in the afternoon so... it's my fault to blame. ( I wasted 2 days to make this post, all in the noon. My mind has now gone crazy and bees are flying circles over my head )

But anyway, just wanna say, thank you thank you, ILY~

[vegaseatsass]

My Stand-in Ep 4 spoilers

Now for a happy post! My Stand-In doing intimate partner violence and toxicity correctly, and by correctly I mean so so sexily <3 Loving this series a lot and recommending it to all my friends lmao. Certainly did not expect it to escalate to this level. My inner Vegas bitch is purring. Just a few notes I wanted to touch on before I get to read what everyone else is saying!

This is now a Wut hate blog! Wowie! Imagine hearing your mentee friend sweetiepie nong was knocked out and chained up in a basement by his deranged (a-affectionate) ex, and reacting like whew! Thank GOD you didn't stand me up on purpose! Lol ya know, I suspected your abusive partner was maybe abusing you, it feels so good to be vindicated in this :') I knew you were a good egg! Anyyyyyyway, no I CAN'T do a thing for you, I staunchly point blank refuse to do anything to support you now that you're isolated, blacklisted, vulnerable, financially desperate and alone. FIND YOUR OWN MEANS OF FINANCIAL SECURITY BUDDY oh but if you do something risky just know I'll be very mad at you and reject you as my nong and isolate you even harder <3 hope this helps!

Don't get me wrong I love Joe's abusive partner though <3 what a man <3 LOVE that his first line of defense is negging. You? Break up with me? Loser! I'm better than you! Lmao like the reason Joe can't believe Ming loves him even when he does start trying to tell him that he loves him isn't just that their whole relationship started as a proxyfucker situation and a lie. It's because Ming spent their whole relationship telling Joe he didn't love him!! :') :') :') They literally both just want someone to be nice to them for five seconds and Joe is able to be nice for five thousand seconds but Ming can't pull it off for more than a minute at a time before trying to get control of the situation again by being a dick. Until his boyfriend is presumed dead. LOVE THAT FOR HIM <3333333

Ming and Sol pulling each other's hair and like having a full-on cat fight was honestly hilarious, 10/10 no notes every show about trained buff men should have slap fights. for ME

Lastly!! the real reason I wanted to post is just how fascinating I find Joe's swing from "we're in love and we're going to get married" the first time Ming smiles at him into "you're full of shit Ming! Don't lie and tell me you actually care about me, I KNOW I was just a sex doll to you and you always loved Tong only!" Like I said, I think Ming playing it cool their entire relationship did not do him any favors re: convincing Joe at this late and chained-up stage that he was actually cared about lmaooooo but I am also torn between thinking that if Ming HAD been able to convince Joe he loved him in that moment, Joe would have sincerely fucked him with the chains on, and let Ming keep him there indefinitely as his basement boyfriend... and between thinking Joe's all-or-nothing reaction to Ming's affections was self-protective survival instinct, getting him the fuck out of there even if a small part of him not only wanted to believe Ming but did believe Ming in that moment. Like he couldn't LET himself believe Ming BECAUSE he needed to not give into the unhinged toxicity, rather than because he actually doesn't think it's possible for Ming to have started out using him but come to love him. Or maybe it's his broken heart and hurt pride that make it impossible to allow that his honeymoon period with Ming was fake but what came after it was real on Ming's end. Does any of that sense? What do u think?

I know nothing about what happens in the novel and that's making this an incredibly incredibly wild and fun ride but also may mean my interpretations are missing very obvious-to-the-readers context. Alas! But I am truly having a ball.

[moonspirit]

I just read somewhere that Annie would never have become a mother by her own choice, because it’s super ooc and misunderstanding of character.

First of all, of course, these are fictional characters, a fictional story, and everyone has the right to their own interpretation. But if we talk about the "right" and "wrong" understanding of smth...Well, let’s perceive the absolute failure of aruani (Annie especially) in parenting as a realistic option (where both go crazy, or Annie hates idea of being mother from the start)...when it would be fair to say that a sincere desire to start a family and parenthood without any horror is ALSO realistic.

It seems to me completely normal not to want children, maybe even feel a little rejection towards them. It’s also completely normal to have such a desire. And it’s normal that opinions can change over time! On my opinion, Annie as a character is quite capable of such changes. This is life, growing up, finding your own desires and goals. Your values ​​may change, you may become more forgiving or even more defensive. Family has different meanings for different people. However, most of them still dive into it head-on. Why can't this happen to these characters? Annie will still have her own understanding of family, love, and motherhood without the cloying sweetness, without the feigned happiness, just the desire to devote a part of herself and her feelings to something new, born out of love for another person.

Also, I've heard that some people may still be irritated by most other people's children, but they are genuinely happy to be parents to their own :))

Sorry for dumping this ton of text on you😭 I'm just afraid of getting into direct "confrontations", but I wanted to share my point with someone. No negativity, i just uuuh disagree that it's somehow catastrophically at odds with Annie's character It will be interesting to read what others think about this

Hello anon. Nothing to apologize for, thank you for coming here to share your thoughts!

I too have seen similar takes, but you know, it's like you say; this is all within the realm of a fictional world with fictional characters and so the possibilities of headcanons going any which way is incredibly vast. Some of us like the pregnancy headcanons, some of us don't, and that's a normal healthy fandom mix haha xD We should filter the stuff we don't want to see and move on, it only becomes problematic when the bashing starts.

Anyway.

I think one reason why some people have a loud problem with this hc is because the picture of the "image" of Annie aligning with what is conventionally seen as a "feminine-desire" to want to get pregnant and have children may somehow be seen as "reducing" her character to just someone who, despite possessing great strength and fighting skills, becomes pregnant, a supposed "weakness". Also consider how many times in the past this whole trope has been used in media to achieve a certain narrative, at least in regards to what women are expected to do with their bodies and how they should live. It's all valid ofc, and the people who reject the very idea of any female fictional character getting pregnant and enjoying it are well within their right to hate it, given the history of the notions and portrayal of pregnancy. This is all probably very inelegant wording and phrasing on my part tho, perhaps someone else can explain it better :<

Coming to Annie specifically, I can only speak for myself when I say that, like you, I see Annie growing to embrace such a possibility with a positive outlook. I get quite a few pregnancy asks these days, and at least in some of them I've talked about how Annie isn't going to be gung-ho about it from the beginning; in fact it's going to be an event in her life that starts with a great deal of emotional uncertainty, anxiety and fear. Do I think Annie's built for having children? Well, as she is in canon - absolutely not. But post-canon, given she has time to learn how to live and experience every emotion that comes, freely and openly... yes. Yes I do think that then, she might look at the idea of starting a family in good spirit.

All this not to say that I would appreciate a scenario where she has kids and then stays at home in typical (and toxic) tradwife fashion, even given the time period post-canon AoT is set in; nope, never, I would hate that. That's not the reason I like the pregnancy headcanon for Annie, I like it because it opens up a whole new world of emotional and situational challenges, something I personally would like Annie to go through. I also believe the whole process of conceiving a child, carrying for nine months and then giving birth is honestly a miracle (and listen, irl I'm someone who shudders at the idea of pregnancy or children xD so I'm not actively advocating for it, just to be clear). And why shouldn't Aruani experience it? For all the deaths and losses in their lives, having a child would be wonderful and cathartic and monumental in changing them as people imo; it would also compound on the very themes present in AoT - that of life, of the value of life and of a person and the beauty of the world.

Just as much as there's nothing wrong with not wanting children, there is also nothing wrong in wanting them. These preferences don't make someone prone to falling into an unhealthy categorization on their own.

So... okay, I think none of what I said is very comprehensible but xD TLDR: I agree with you anon, I agree.

[redlerred7]

I'm like a hundred words into the next chapter of Sincerity is Rock, Actually and I'm reminded if some comments I received and conversations I had back in April about the way I write Ryo. Specifically, about how strong my characterization of her is.

It confused me.

Don't get me wrong, I was happy everyone liked the way I wrote her, but I didn't understand why the people I talked to insisted my Ryo was different.

At the time, I wasn't familiar with the fanfic scene for Bocchi the Rock. Even now, I'd say I'm still not very familiar with it—but at least I've read a dozen or so fics since that time. I think I kinda understand the difference now?

The biggest thing I've seen is how a lot of Ryo's unleasant traits are toned down. She's less of an asshole; she's more emotive; she's more talkative; and most importantly, she thinks about how her actions affect other people and seems to adjusts her behavior accordingly.

No, stop that! She's a judgemental elitist with a permanent bitch face who borrows money from people without paying them back. Writing Ryo like she's a decent human being with a working concept of action and consequence removes the most interesting point of tension to her characterization: the fact that she can be so unpleasant while still being Ride or Die for her friends. You lose so much by sanding down those rough edges.

This sanding down of Ryo is also the reason I find myself not feeling as strongly for many of the shippy fics involving her. Ryo being such an asshole that you question why people are friends with her informs a lot of the friendships she does have.

Bocchi is a doormat who Ryo takes advantage of, but they also have An Understanding™ because of their mutual respect for the other's musicianship and a shared experience with being alone and unable/unwilling express their feelings to other people. Bocchi is willing to accept Ryo's worse qualities because… well, frankly, it's because she's desperate for friends. However! The other reason is because Ryo understands her, and will engage with her loneliness and negative feelings in a way that basically no one else in the cast is willing or able to engage.

Kita is infatuated with Ryo's coolness and uncompromising commitment to the bit—which, again, Ryo takes advantage of. From the other direction, Ryo respects Kita Go-Getter attitude and willingness to actually put in the work to get better at guitar—it's just that she's completely unable or unwilling to express that respect. Despite that, I get the sense that Kita still feels Ryo's respect on some level, and it makes her feel valued enough that her infatuation with Ryo never really goes away.

And finally, there's Nijika, who I went on a whole spiel about in chapter 2 of Sincerity is Rock, Actually, which I'll copy-paste here.

Honestly, Nijika's acceptance of Ryo's worst qualities is so fascinating for their dynamic. She's not trying to "fix" Ryo—and the fact that she isn't seems to be something Ryo is aware of. And even more fascinating is that, despite knowing that Nijika does very little to stop her, I don't really think Ryo tries to take advantage of Nijika the same way she would try with others. I'm not sure whether this is because Ryo rationalized a reason Nijika would be off limits or because Nijika gave her reasons. Regardless, it leaves them with a strange sense of equal footing that I find appealing.

All of these relationships lose a quality to them when Ryo isn't constantly trying to take advantage of people.

Though, I suppose I'm focusing too much on the Ryo-being-an-asshole part, since it's not like those tendencies would be relevant in every story. What is relevant is Ryo's lack of emotional intelligence.

I mentioned earlier that Ryo's flat affect is one of those things that are toned down often in fics. It's not nearly as toned down as the asshole aspects, but it's still different enough that I noticed it.

The difference, I've found, is that people seem to write Ryo's stoicism as either:

A. Ryo deliberately holding back her emotions,

B. Ryo simply not feeling her emotions that strongly,

or lastly, C. some combination of the above two.

C feels the most correct of the options I listed, and is also relatively common in the fics I've read, but I also feel like it's incomplete. It misses an important aspect in that I don't think Ryo actually understands emotions in general. Like, at all.

Think about it: Ryo doesn't feel most of her emotions very strongly. Whatever emotions she does feel stongly, she doesn't understand, so she pushes them out of her mind and doesn't express them—at least not outside of music. In doing so, she creates the outward appearance of stoicism, which her peers find her cool, thus reinforcing the behavior.

Sounds about right for Ryo, right? Wanna know how that reads to me?

Ryo is a teenaged boy—or at least she acts like one.

Like, it's so obvious to me! The commitment to the bit; the emotional constipation; even the general assholery! From the moment I first watched the show, Ryo always felt so "teenaged boy"-coded. She reminded me of a bunch of friends I had back when I was studying at an all-boys highschool.

Which also explains why, of all the fics I've read, the ones where Ryo is a trans girl were the ones most similar to how I would write her. Because of course they would be! Trans!Ryo writers obviously understand the teenaged boy-like aspects of Ryo. The difference seems to be that trans!Ryo writers want to distance Ryo from those aspects while I lean harder into them.

So, to conclude this post, let me answer the question that confounded me at the start: what makes the way I write Ryo different from others?

My Ryo is an asshole

My Ryo doesn't feel most emotions strongly. When she does feel them strongly, she doesn't understand them. To avoid confusion, she shoved those emotions aside and doesn't think about or express them.

My Ryo is basically a teenaged boy who is a girl.

Does that make sense?

[crownmemes]

House Sentences, Vol. 3

(Sentences from House (2004-2012). Adjust phrasing where needed)

"I want to know how you feel about me."

"You live under the delusion that you can fix everything that isn’t perfect."

"I'm not going to like you, am I?"

"It’s a basic truth of the human condition that everybody lies."

"If you can fake sincerity, you can fake pretty much anything."

"We went on one date. It didn't go very well."

"I assume you have a reason beyond wanting to make me completely miserable?"

"Do you know why people are nice to other people?"

"It’s all about speed isn’t it? One thing to another; never standing still."

"I'm not going to kiss you, no matter what you say."

"She's scarier than you are!"

"Why are you so curious about his curiosity?"

"You’re not happy unless things are just right, which means two things: you’re a good boss, and you’ll never be happy."

"By the way, why does everybody think you and I had sex?"

"You think I have a hypocritical attitude to hypocrisy?"

"Can't we just agree that you're incredibly annoying?"

"You're trying to objectively measure how much I value our friendship?"

"If love's based on lies, does that mean it's not a real feeling? Doesn't bring the same pleasure?"

"Do you really think this is going to end well for anyone?"

"I need to know - do you hate me, or do you love me?"

"You'd be surprised what you can live with."

"Everyone says you slept together."

"Such a hero; always righting wrongs. Who cares who you have to manipulate?"

"You're mad at me for letting you know what I did because you liked where things were going."

"If there's a screw up, it's your screw up."

"Work smart, not hard. That's my philosophy."

"I teach you to lie, cheat, and steal, and as soon as my back is turned, you wait in line?"

"For once in your life, will you shut up?"

"Did you iron your shirt?"

"Are you being intentionally thick?"

"If I never tell him, it'll never hurt."

"You can either have a life with me, or you can have a life with him. It can't be both."

"Do you think he's capable of having a real relationship?"

"Can you please be a human being for one minute and talk to me?"

"You're not ready for this."

"Knowing is always better than not knowing."

"At some point, you'll need something more. You'll need someone who can give you something I can't."

"You don't like yourself, but you do admire yourself. It's all you've got, so you cling to it."

"You're so afraid if you change, you'll lose what makes you special."

"Being miserable doesn't make you any better than anyone else. It just makes you miserable."

"Have you even read an ethical guideline?"

"You get distracted by pain. It leaves less room for the things you don't want to think about."

"If you've got a problem with a call I make, question the call. Don't make it personal."

"Gifts express guilt. The more expensive the expression, the deeper the guilt."

[tamelee]

What do you dislike most about naruto (manga) besides the ending?

Hi Non.e ♡

I don't know if it is a dislike as much, it did bother me though. And that is how dismissive Naruto has been about his own trauma. Don't get me wrong, it is realistic in a way- but for storytelling considering how much it has impacted further conversation, I wish this was explored more.

In the real world Naruto's behavior towards himself as he gets a mirror thrown in front of him (his 'Dark' self) is explainable (yk what I mean), yet in this story, in the world of Shinobi, it doesn't make much sense. Naruto has been extremely hurt. He says that Sasuke and his roles could've easily been reversed. Which I have no doubt about. At times we see Naruto suddenly bursting with anger. When he thought Gaara had died he showed anger too and cried, for him, but also for himself.

Sounds to me like he wasn't just talking about Gaara. And I don't think I'm the only one if you look at those faces.

Although he was happy to finally meet Minato.. his dad, he punched him in the gut. Opinions aside, this is how Naruto felt at the moment.

Naruto had been in distress for a while, yet thinking about an afterlife with Sasuke but not carrying the burden of being Uchiha or Jinchuuriki makes Naruto look somewhat relieved.

Anyway skip to the 'Waterfall of Truth' and Dark Naruto.

Gerotora the scroll toad, confirms to Naruto that Dark or Evil Naruto is connected to Kurama. The hatred within Naruto's heart or as Motoi describes it 'a reflection of Naruto's true self'. He tries to fight it to no avail.

Motoi voices that Naruto would not be able to use the Kyuubi’s powers if he can’t beat his hatred. He also tells Naruto that despite him and Bee both being Jinchuriki and having similar pasts, Bee passed the Waterfall training in a blink of an eye.

But, both characters are simply not the same, despite being Jinchuriki with similar pasts. They have different things that impacts and challenges them. As Naruto stalks off he thinks about his own past.

About the similarities between Bee and Gaara, how the villagers went from shunning the boys to treating them as heroes. And that is exactly what happened to Naruto as well- which is what ‘Dark Naruto’ hates. Uh, he who lives deep within his own heart hates. But instead of addressing that issue, Naruto starts to worry whether the villagers really trust him yet or not.. what...???

No. Trust me, I get the point. Doesn't mean I have to like it.

So with that in mind, Naruto goes back to confront his Dark self, but then I wonder, who really is the 'Dark' one anyway? I talked about this before but manipulation can be as simple as telling another you are “fine” when, in a real sense, you are depressed.

What Naruto then does is a form of manipulation.. to himself because it controls the perception of the other, “Dark-Naruto” and how they react to you. Other times, manipulation also has more insidious consequences, and most times, it is associated with emotional abuse, especially in intimate relationships. And you can’t really be more intimate if it literally is you. When the practice is prolonged, a manipulated person usually ends up with physical, emotional as well as mental health issues if they do not realize the situation sooner and save themselves from it.

“Dark-Naruto” is the part of Naruto that is honest, that sincerely tells Naruto how he feels and questions him when he doesn’t understand something “No.. I don’t know what you mean!” (Please, elaborate further, I want to understand.)

Whereas Naruto just responds with: “Don’t play dumb with me.”

And how was Dark Naruto supposed to know if you ‘just thought about it a minute ago’. Naruto completely disregards whatever his ‘hatred’ shouts at him to make him truly understand. Now that he has the chance. But instead of working through it, understanding his emotional baggage as he does with everyone else, friends and foes, (Talk No Jutsu) he uses tactics to temporarily control his environment. How he feels. Aka his heart.

Naruto literally manipulates himself.

Naruto: “I’ve only become strong, because of your help, you MIGHT even be the reason I’m here now.”

“Dark” Naruto: “Then why? What am I supposed to do now?” (Genuine confusion.)

Naruto: “What do you think?” (“You’re overreacting.”)

Naruto: “You be like me, because you are me.” (The hell does that even mean?) - (“My hatred seems to be not worthy of any emotional response, it’s dramatic and silly. I’ll make it question it’s own maturity and mental health and damage it into shock for the moment so it disappears for now.”

He didn't overcome his trauma/anger, he didn't "love" it or erase it by hugging it for a moment- nothing. Yet it worked enough for him to "believe it!"

And that was all that he needed in order for it to go into hiding.

So.. my Headcanon is that Dark Naruto actually still exist. A few words and an autograph won't sign him away- I, for one do not "believe it!" (In theory, I do know that it is true, cuz: Manga.)