#and don’t want to be seen as weak or dumb so they change themselves or hide what they actually like just so they aren’t perceived as such

[miss-controversial]

Men (and at times even women) will go on and on about how being feminine, or just being a woman in general, sucks because they're weak and stupid, then have the audacity to actually be surprised when women don’t want to be feminine or be seen as feminine and begin to act tomboyish to “not be like other girls.” 

[lady-ashfade]

Hey mate! It didn’t say anything about Cobra Kai male requests so not sure if you’ll do this.

Can I request Yandere Hawk & Miguel x male reader? Plot can be anything. Just want to read some no mercy era Hawk and Miguel. Thanks!

Little thing

Yandere!Hawk&miguel x reader. (HC’s)

Notes: Even though my requests for cobra Kai are closed- Honestly I was in a cobra Kai mood actually, which is kinda scary. I was going to write something and I have been reading cobra kai fics for the best two days- Anyway. This is short because I didn’t know what to put down, I hope you like it.

(Opening up my cobra Kai requests man)

Yandere type: Medium (idk)

Warning: Stalking, Yandere tendencies, violence, obsession, dark themes.

The boys would notice you when they get into a class with you, they have never really seen you around before.

You sat in front of the two boys, and they caught glimpse of you one day and couldn’t get enough.

You’d always smile at the people who walked by but you never seemed to talk much. They always notice you always tapping your foot to the music in your ear pud, that you secretly put in.

Hawk pointed you out in class. Saying along the lines of how you were kinda cute but how you always seemed shy, Miguel agreed.

So the two started to follow you around school without you noticing, they learned where you were at all times. What subjects you liked and didn’t, who you talked to and didn’t.

“They need protection, just look at them.” Miguel pointed out as you stood at your locker, hawk smirked and leaned on Miguel shoulder, “I’m in, little thing doesn’t seem to notice anything.”

No matter if you are taller, bigger, shorter, anything. They see you as a small, weak, fragile thing. And you know how people have this thing to protect the person they love, the two go over border.

Ever drop a pencil in class and don’t notice? It’s theirs now. They have a whole bag of things they have of you.

Now, when someone gave you a bad look even just once, or talk bad to you. The two of them teach that person a lesson. They did it at night where no one can see, beat the living shit out of them.

You started to find it weird how everyone around you stared to get hurt, it made you think you were cursed.

In the locker rooms they always come behind you while you change and pretend like they are focused on themselves but make sure no one looks at you, or gets near you. Or if you change in a stall they stand outside it just to make sure but have a conversation loudly to make sure you don’t really notice.

They have snuck a few glances.

Then one day their prayers were answered when you three got paired up in a class project. Oh, the boys couldn’t stop their heart beats when they heard your name.

The two almost didn’t know how to actually talk to you at first, but when they started they couldn’t stop. How they could be so close to you, to touch you, smell you- Hold you. It drives them crazy.

They asked things about you one right after the other and overwhelmed you. You answered as best as you could and thought it was just them being friendly. But you knew them both because of the whole karate-war going down.

You invited them over to your house to start working on projects and they couldn’t wait.

While they were in your room they stole things, small things but still. I see them stealing a shirt of yours, or objects they found.

The two “befriended” you that night and decided to calm themselves down to drawl you in. They acted really nice and kind, which they were. But hide there other side.

Here’s some things they do, romance or in the friendship area.

Following your around to make you untouchable. Glares at anyone who looks close to your way.

They call you “Little thing” constantly. Or tiny, or anything that’s belittling, but not that mean. Hawk tho will call you stupid but he just want to make you feel dumb so you ask him for help.

(Hawks the meaner one of the two)

They start to control you, like saying what you should wear but make you think you chose it yourself. Or by getting you things to eat. Where you go, when you go. They only make you hang out with them.

Miguel is the one who babies you the most in a sense. He treats you like a prince. Always being the joking guy who makes you smile and laugh. He’ll hold onto you by the waist. He’s “softer” with you. Because come on, he’s so fluffy when he doesn’t want to murder anyone.

Hawk treats you like you can’t do anything alone. Like walking, you could wonder off. Or maybe you’ll walk out into traffic, hold his hand. Hawk is so overbearing. Like you have to tell him to chill at moments.

But the thing they both have in common is being feral over you.

I’m talking about they don’t care where they fight, but it’s away from you, but school fights happens all the time.

Broken a guys wrist, treated some guy with deadly threats, have put so many people in the hospital.

They will stop at nothing, I mean never killing anyone…But if someone hurts you then it’s not there problem if their body gives up on their own.

Don’t allow you to join a dojo. The only way you are going near a dojo is watching them practicing.

Man, I just seen them ass overbearing.

[guiltycorp]

this might be a controversial opinion, but I think Shoko’s ‘I was there too’ was another expression of the author’s slide into sexism in the latter half of JJK

because the thing is, at the time of reading the backstory arc, I thought it was an exceptionally good decision not to involve Shoko in the main plot too much despite being the typical 1 girl 2 boys as per shonen standards, she refused to engage with them on a narrative level from her words about ‘never becoming trash like those two’ to her consistent avoidance of getting involved in their conflicts, Shoko also never presented her own stance on strong vs weak or non-sorcerers vs sorcerers, she just wanted to do her own thing and let the boys sort out themselves

and when letting Gojo know the whereabouts of the newly snapped Geto, she says ‘no way, i don’t want to be killed’, which is obviously another valid reason why she didn’t want to participate in their break-up thing

...for a ‘girl character in a trio’ this complete avoidance is an admirably fresh character trait!! if she tried to act like a true supportive friend, she would inevitably have to take on the emotional burden of her two male classmates no matter how empathetic Geto was as a person, with his slide into complete breakdown it would still fall on Shoko to try and handle it emotionally, leading to an unsatisfactory sexist trope similarly to Nobara who never acted as the ‘safe-rational-emotional core of the group’, Shoko never fell into the trap of being a prop for male characters’ feelings and decisions   

moreover, it worked well in that arc specifically because there were other female characters who actually did serve as exactly that, changing both Gojo and Geto for good despite this being another ‘female character dies for male character progression’ i think it still worked pretty well due to Riko representing the established cycle of innocent youth dying because of their messed up society 

(...and also because this was far from the only factor influencing both Gojo and Geto) 

one could argue that still, with Shoko and Yaga being the only survivors who knew Gojo and Geto that well (the extent of Nanami’s closeness to them seems unclear to me) Gojo never remained alone ...but Yaga was another cog in the system, consecutively failing his students time and time again and Shoko... well, in the fanbook, it was said that she’s neutral and doesn’t have a preference between Gojo and the higher-ups, and yeah, she didn’t comment on any of his rants about changing the status-quo

of course, she still did what he asked her to do (writing off Yuji as ‘deceased’ on the report) and she is not completely heartless as seen in the JJK0 movie where she immediately left the room as soon as Yaga called for Geto’s immediate execution  there’s also the ambiguous way Kenjaku phrased this where it could mean either that Gojo himself didn’t want to fully destroy Geto’s body or that he didn’t want Shoko to do it to spare her feelings (personally i’m leaning more towards the first option tho tbh) ‘You are only considerate during such awkward moments’.

BUT THE POINT IS, no matter how valid for her own character, she did absolutely leave both Gojo and Geto alone! purposefully so, too so for the author to suddenly bring up her own feelings making it seem as if it’s Gojo who ignored her steadfast support and presence in his life is... just a return to the more basic tenets of ‘woman longs to be appreciated by a man but the man is busy doing other more important things’

like, Gojo is a dumb bitch with extremely low emotional intelligence who relies a little too much on his personal understanding of strength when it comes to forging connections but to pretend that Shoko was there for him or Geto is a disservice to all of their characters also, while it’s canon that Gojo doesn’t let himself open up to anyone other than Geto, it’s not like there are people by his side who’d be willing to listen to him anyway?... it’s not a coincidence that both Utahime and Nanami have a lot of Geto’s more admirable traits and yet dislike Gojo instead of enjoying his company and to me it’s a shame that fandom jumped so readily on this perceived dynamic of poor left-out Shoko...

she was never left out, she left on her own time and time again!

[save-the-villainous-cat]

Hey! i hope youre having a great day🌷🌷

Could you pretty please do some angst?? I'm craving for something that'll make me hold my breath and make me so nervous that I'll forget my name. Just pure and raw angst. Maybe something involving betrayal and torture?? That's up to you!!

luv u <3, your writings just *chef kiss*

(sorry for any grammatical mistakes, english is not my first language😅)

“I believe that of this moment, you’re the only person that could possibly understand me,” the hero whispered, quite too aware of all their weaknesses right now. It was dark in the villain’s lair and the whole ambience started with spooky and ended with mysterious. The hero knew what they asked for was impossible to impose on a human. 

That’s why they had turned to the villain.

For half a year they had waited to bring this up. It had simmered in their mind and consumed their sleep. They felt sick for coming to the villain with this. They felt sick just thinking about this.

Their enemy toyed with a pointy and slim knife, skilled fingers doing lazy tricks carelessly. The hero knew exactly how painful those blades were.

“Okay,” they said, leaning forward, “let me get this straight. You want me to kill your boss? The superhero? The big shot? The person who raised you?”

The hero swallowed, feeling the dreadful pain punching in their stomach. 

“Yes.”

“Because they may have taken international prisoners illegally and tortured them?” The villain didn’t sound convinced. They didn’t even sound interested which was, quite frankly, a problem. The hero had hoped to bait them with the promise of revenge and power. “Is there any proof of that?” 

“I’ve seen them, yes. The prisoners, I mean.”

“Ever thought of talking it out?” The villain chuckled at their own question, quite aware that the hero was ranked too low to even exchange glances with the superhero.

It was true that the superhero had raised the hero but that didn’t mean that they had any advantages within the agency. Not to mention the public argument a few years ago. Ever since, the hero had found themselves at daggers drawn with their mentor.

They didn’t talk.

“Look, I don’t wanna get into this family business.”

“They’re not my family anymore.”

“Do you think I’m dumb? This is a trap,” the villain said. Their eyes were as cold as ice, studying every move the hero made, ready for a kill. Ready for anything. “You want me to get close to them so they can kill me.” 

The hero swallowed the doubts, pushed back down the tears. If this didn’t work, then a lot of people would get killed. Chaos would rule.

“Listen, I don’t care how you kill them. Hire someone else or take care of them as a sharpshooter — it doesn’t matter,” they said. “We need them dead. For the sake of everyone living in this country. They’ve done questionable things in the past and I was dumb enough to believe that they would change. Actions speak louder than words. They pretend to be a hero but they’re anything but. While I was waiting, everything turned to shit. I can’t let anyone else get hurt because of them. A hero is supposed to help.”

They took in a long breath and sipped on the scotch the villain had brought them. The back of their throat hurt.

“I know how crude this is. And I know it is a lot to ask for. But at the end of the day, I’m afraid we don’t have a chance. Hell, I cried my eyes out when I realised this was the only solution. They’re too dangerous to be captured and sedatives don’t work on them. We have no choice. They will come for you, too.” 

At that, the villain raised their eyebrows. They blinked.

“Oh, really?” 

“Haven’t you noticed how crimes are dropping? That villains are disappearing?” The statistic was scary. Even for a hero. People with superpowers were vanishing everywhere. “They’ve become a rotting criminal. No offence.”

The villain hummed, a smirk on their face. They seemed much too amused for a topic that was causing the hero’s innards to turn.

“You’re the only one who can defeat them,” the hero said when the villain didn’t speak further. The tears were swelling up again. It hadn’t always been bad. The superhero hadn’t always been bad. 

“You really think that?” the villain asked. They leaned forward in their chair, their hands still fidgeting with the weapon. “Do you think I’m scary, little hero?”

The hero was too short on vocable creativity to describe the sound of their voice. The closest word was probably flirty. 

“A bit, yes.” 

“Hmm.” The villain seemed to be satisfied with that answer. Swiftly, they stood up and reached for the hero’s cheek, wiping away a single tear with their thumb. “That’s quite a mess you’re in, huh?”

The hero leaned against the villain’s hand, savouring the touch.

“Yeah,” they rasped. The villain came even closer, their nose almost touching the hero’s cheek.

“You’re so pretty…” they said, completely entranced. “I’ll help you but after that, I want you to be mine.”

The hero didn’t hesitate. “Deal.”

The superhero died two weeks later. The press said it was a quick and painless death but there was no denying that that didn’t really calm the public. The funeral was short and simple with little room for nosy reporters.

No one knew the killer and being aware of someone who was capable of destroying the strongest superhero on earth was a little more than upsetting. Somehow, the agency managed to keep everything under control, staying reassuring and hopeful in a time of need. 

What the villain didn’t know at the time of the killing was that their action made the hero the head of the agency. 

“Enjoying your promotion?” they asked the hero sourly the night after everything got released to the public. The hero took in a deep breath.

“I don’t have time for you right now, I’m sorry.” They searched through endless documents, signing them, rearranging them. It was robotic how they went through each paper.

“I’m not here for that,” the villain said. If it was possible, they looked even scarier than usual. “You fucking used me.”

“I didn’t know they had changed the election rules,” the hero responded. “Do you think I wanted this? Do you think I wanted this responsibility and all the work—”

Tears formed in the hero’s eyes again.

“God, why did they make me the leader?” The hero swallowed a sob. “It doesn’t make sense…I didn’t want this—”

“You used me,” the villain said again, their expression getting darker. All they could see was the betrayal and the backstabbing. They’d been so clever, so sure of this. They’d hoped the hero would join them but no, they’d become a more powerful hero. The most powerful.

“I didn’t use you,” the hero said. Tears ran down their cheeks, desperate for some security. “Please.” 

They walked around the table, reaching out and grasping the villain’s clothes, holding onto them as if they were their rock in an unforgiving sea. Sobbing into their shoulder, they searched for every possible contact. 

“I don’t want this,” they whispered, their voice only cut off by broken gasps and the rising guilt in their throat. “Please. I don’t want this. This can’t be happening. It’s too much. Please, I need you.” 

The hero almost slipped but the villain caught them clumsily, holding them to their chest in a comforting manner.

“Shh,” they said, rubbing the hero’s back. “It’s a lot, I know.”

And suddenly, the murderous thoughts got replaced by a memory. The villain was reminded of the time when they’d lost their parents.

“Please help me,” the hero said, rubbing their face into the villain’s suit. “I can bring you into the agency, I can give you power, just please help me.” 

The villain contemplated. The hero was so desperate and alone…Guilt was eating them up and everything inside the villain tossed and turned. Every natural instinct rebelled and fought but it didn’tmatter. The Villain had made their decision already.

Compassion overwhelmed them. They’d never felt something like this before. Something — the hero made them weak. Seeing them cry, seeing them desperate and upset…there was no use fighting this. Feelings were always dangerous but now with the superhero out of the way, things could be easier.

All the villain had ever wanted was to protect their family. That had spiralled into this great mess that their life was. And maybe, the hero could fix that. Maybe the hero could help them and give them a fresh start.

They kissed the top of the hero’s head. 

“I’ll join you,” they said, smiling warmly. 

“You would do that for me?”

“Yes, darling. Besides, being a hero is probably not that bad.”

It was worse. 

The villain cried out when the hero stabbed their thigh. It was sharp and painful and probably had cut deep enough into their flesh to touch bone.

The tears were quick to follow; a waterfall of salt as suffering surrounded the villain. It was so bad, they were ready to give up here on the spot. A week ago the hero had started to prepare for war. Allies had turned into enemies which had led to several attacks across the whole country. 

City after city had turned into ashes and the hero had been willing to sacrifice every life for their great plan. We need to help. Our neighbours need us.

The words echoed in the villain’s mind, making them cry even more. You and I. We were born to be leaders.

No matter how much the villain had begged them rethink their plan, to come back to bed and relax, to take the day off with them, no matter how hard they’d tried, the hero hadn’t given up.

“Darling, it doesn’t have to be like this,” the hero said gently, tilting their head. They seemed to be unbothered by the flames around them. By the screams and the burning buildings. “Stop resisting me, my love.”

The villain tried to stand up but their ankle had been shattered throughout the fight. 

“You knew it, didn’t you?” they wheezed. Tasting blood, they spat on the ground. “You knew that if the superhero died, you would get the position.” 

“I did,” the hero confessed. They looked at the scene around them and had the audacity to look hopeful, proud even. “But I didn’t ask you to kill them because of that. Don’t you see? It’s our responsibility to help people. They were torturing people.”

“And what are you doing? Look around you,” the villain screamed. “You’re mad if you think this will bring peace.”

The pain was overwhelming. The villain didn’t know how much blood they had lost but judging by the ground, it was a lot.  

“Have you seen the statistics?” the hero asked. “The poverty and the amount of crime in other countries— have you seen the misery?”

“Do you see the misery?!” the villain shouted again. “Fucking look around you.”

“I’ve made the calculations. Sacrificing our country is worth it when we can save our neighbouring countries. You and I. We have brought wealth and happiness to everyone here. We can do it again,” they lowered their weapon, offering a hand and the villain just stared. Stared at the hand. Stared at the horrible decisions.

They should’ve seen it coming. They should’ve killed the hero when they’d had the chance.

And yet, the villain looked into the same eyes. The eyes of someone who had wanted to help prisoners, someone who had overcome themselves for the greater good. Someone who had thrown their morals away with good intentions.

Someone who had never found their morals ever again.

“You’re a monster,” the villain said. A sob escaped their mouth. “I thought I loved you. Fuck, I really thought if someone could help me change, it would be you.”

“We’re heroes,” the hero mumbled.

“Actions speak louder than words,” the villain reminded them. “You taught me that.”

With their last strength, they managed to get a grip on the hero and tackle them to the ground. The hero made a pathetic sound when their head smashed into the ground.

“Fuck,” the villain said, breathing heavily. It felt like there was blood in their lungs. “I really did. I really loved you.”

And before the hero managed a response, the villain took their knife and pushed it far enough into the hero’s chest to make the breaking of their ribs a sound. The hero tried to grab them, tried to hold them, push the knife away but they just ended up cutting their hands, losing even more blood.

By now, the villain was sobbing, the shock infiltrating their mind and the feeling of the hero’s crumbling life running through their fingers dawning on them. When the hero’s movements stilled and their breathing stopped, the villain intertwined their fingers.

For the last time, they kissed the top of the hero’s head. They knew they wouldn’t survive this either.

And they were glad they didn’t.

[justanisabelakinnie]

I was pretty bored yesterday and in a bitter mood and so I ended up spam-reblogging a shitload of anti-Madoka Magica posts(and no I’m not sorry, because no matter fucking what I will never stop hating on that trashfest of an anime), and obviously there’s nothing much really that I can say about it that hasn’t already been said by both me and other people in the past but lemme just say how FUCKED up it is…that grown men can look at a genre full of light and hope and female solidarity and empowerment for girls that teaches them that they can be whatever they want to be and that they should never stop believing in themselves and striving for greatness and go “nope, fuck that, instead of all of that happy fun girl power shit let’s write an edgy grimdark dystopia where being a girl with dreams and a desire to strive for greatness is a bad thing that can only end in suffering and punishment, where the survival of the universe and progress of humanity literally hinges on girls being tortured and killed en masse for wishing for something that would make them happy, where girls are universally portrayed as overemotional and impressionable and susceptible and weak and must slay each other in order to survive because they’ll go berserk and monstrous once their power inevitably gets the better of them, and where the only way to escape this ending is by dying and being erased from existence, because that’s the best girls can hope for, and as the icing on the sour cake, let’s aim it at an adult male audience so that they can watch girls suffer and perish and be psychologically broken for their own entertainment, all because they wanted something for themselves and had the gall and the selfishness to go after it.”

And instead of people seeing it for the sexist torture porn that it is it gets glowing reviews on every platform, people eat this shit up and say that this sleazy adult male-aimed show about barely adolescent girls suffering because they wanted something more for themselves is feminist actually, that actually all of the turmoil that the girls go through is a totally girl power metaphor for how girls suffer at the hands of patriarchy in the real world, and how the torture porn got subverted at the end when really all the end did was show the girls continuing to suffer because of their wishes but hey at least they’ll get the sweet release of death in the end, and how the all-male writing staff definitely meant for this to be the next feminist coming of Jesus despite the fact that they say they weren’t inspired by any Magical Girl works that came before them and were instead inspired by porn games…Madoka is the most progressive and revolutionary anime ever really, even more so than those insightful shows about Magical Girls that are actually aimed at girls and actually feature female empowerment and angst done well and not just for the sole purpose of letting men watch female characters suffer, those other shows are just stupid and shallow and bland and don’t know what they’re talking about, Madoka is where it’s at. Take it from me, a 35-year-old man who has never seen a single Magical Girl anime in my life except for Madoka Magica. If you don’t agree with me or if you dare to critique my soulless male gaze moebait, then you’re obviously just dumb and ignorant and don’t understand the deep philosophical nuances of this shoddy anime, I mean just look at Madoka’s mom! She’s the breadwinner of her family! Sure she’s not important to the plot on a whole and it’s not like Heartcatch Precure has done this character archetype better or anything but she’s proof that the writers are feminist icons who set out to empower women! Now watch as me and the rest of my Madoka-loving friends proceed to bully and harass the shit out of you for not sharing our vapid opinions until you either delete your account, change your tune and say you like Madoka now and were so wrong and stupid before, or stop talking about how much you hate Madoka entirely. And anyway teenage girls really ARE irrational, hysterical, and constantly on their cycles. Of course they’ll get taken advantage of for it! That’s not misogynistic to point out, that’s just the biotruth!

[erodasfishtacos]

I wanna see gang yn tell Harry she’s pregnant- or see little moments between them while she’s pregnant, like finding out they’re having twins. 🥺

okay but I imagine this.

tw: violence, blood, weapons, smut

-

There is currently three dead men in their warehouse.

Harry has another one tied to a creaky old wooden chair, interrogating him with a sharp knife on his cheek, “Where the fuck is Richie? I know you killed one of my men.”

The man spits at Harry, leaning away from the blade, “Fuck you. I’m not talkin’.”

YN is watching casually from where she’s sitting on a countertop, a iced coffee in her hand, and she’s just admiring how hot her husband is.

His long hair is pulled up in a bun, his sharp jaw clenched, blood on his white shirt that’s clung a bit to his body with sweat and other fluids.

He’s so lean, muscular with bulging biceps, abs taut under his clothes. Her name tattooed proudly on his neck, little beads of sweat.

Harry slices down his cheek, tearing the skin open, “Tell me right now or I’m goin’ t’kill you. This is your last warning. I am about to show you why they call me Diablo,” Harry seethes, the knife dragging down to his neck.

He refuses to speak, Harry gets impatient and pulls out his weapon of choice - his desert eagle and delivers one resounding shot.

Harry looks unsympathetically at the rival gang members, his own men sitting back and letting the leader work.

The associates began to scuttle around to begin the clean up process.

Her husband tugs off his shirt and then shimmies out of his tight black jeans - tossing them carelessly by the bodies so his men can dispose of them.

Just in his tight briefs, his intricate morale of the depth of hell and the devil decorating his whole chest and stomach.

Then he’s trailing over to his wife, grabbing her jaw and searing their lips together for a long kiss as she runs a hand over his tensed abs.

It’s not the right moment, well it wouldn’t be for a normal couple but they weren’t any normal couple to start off with.

“I want to have a baby,” YN blurts out as her husband’s hands grip onto her thighs to pull her center against his.

Harry doesn’t look surprised often.

His mossy green eyes widen, puffy lips parting, as he searches her relax, open face, “You want me t’put a baby in you?”

She nods, feeling a nervous fluttering, they’d been married for three years - it had been on her mind a lot.

“If you aren’t - I know we’ve been talking about it. But if it’s not some-“ She stutters out as she observes Harry’s stoic face.

He leans forward, cupping her face, and telling her firmly, “I will give you whatever y’want, sweetheart. If y’want me to make y’a mommy - I’ll do it right now.”

By this point the men had dragged the bodies out to a nondescript van and were pouring industrial grade bleach on the tiled floor.

Harry turns around and booms, “Get the fuck out, right now.”

The associates pause, confused, Greg speaks, “But we just start-“

In true Harry form, he grabs his gun next to his wife, and fires at warning shot at their feet, “Fuck off or next time it’s going to be y’leg.”

They run out like there’s fire under their arses.

YN shouldn’t get wetter at that but she does.

He turns around after the leave, wastes no time to in yanking her shirt over her head, bra, and then roughly stripping off her legging, and panties

“Fuckin’ look at you, made you my wife, now m’make y’the mother of my babies,” Harry hisses when YN sneaks her hand in his briefs to tug his thick length out.

“Remember when we first met. You told me you never wanted to even have a girlfriend, let alone a wife. You told me you didn’t want kids,” YN murmurs as she pumps him with a firm grip.

Harry groans into her mouth, “Baby, jus’ like tha’. All that changed when I fell f’you.”

YN swipes her thumb over the tip before tugging the fabric down his narrow hips and guiding him right into where she’s so warm and ready for him.

“You told me love was made up by pathetic stupid people who were too dumb to realize it was a scam,” She reminds him, breath hitching when he stretches her perfectly.

-

As they’re waiting for drinks, Harry scoffs at a young couple kiss and cooing at each other on the other side of the way.

It was a really shady bar.

They were there to do business together - Harry and YN - nothing more than that.

“Fuckin’ idiots,” He shakes his head, swigging down his whiskey dry as soon as it’s placed in front of him - he doesn’t even flinch.

“They’re in love,” YN defends with a small smiles as she watches the man make the girl giggle with glee - just happiness.

“So y’a fucking idiot too?” Harry asks meanly, giving her a glance over with a pursed lip, “Guess y’beauty and no fuckin’ brains.”

“You have a real way with women, charmer,” She replies sarcastically, sipping her whiskey sour.

Harry laughs with a tinge of arrogance, “I don’t need charm. Any women and most men in this bar would fuck if they had the chance.”

“Well I’ll be one who won’t,” YN says haughtily.

His jaw clenches subtly, “Don’t be bitter, darling. Love is made up. It doesn’t exists. It’s for weak-minded little sheeps like you.”

—-

Harry takes a deep inhale, eyes dark as night, teeth bared as he tells her, “Our love isn’t what other average people have. I still believe all of that. My love f’you is s’strong I’d fuckin’ die for you this second.”

YN moans when he fucks in hard enough to make her skid back on the counter - he grips her harder and anchors her back down.

“D’you think any other man would do tha’ f’their wife? I mean truly do that? No. I’ve seen men let their wives die to save themselves,” Harry grits out, tugging her legs around his waist.

She is panting, not able to get a word out between breathes, he’s giving it to her so fucking well. Her nipples brushing against his sweaty chest, making it feel so much better.

Her grips her jaw hard, “Answer me.”

“Baby, I know, I know. I love you, please,” She begs loudly, whining when he wraps his hand around her neck.

“Open,” Harry orders, hand forcing her mouth open before spitting and then chasing it with his tongue into her mouth.

“H, m’coming.” YN warns him, pushing her hips into his until their skin is slapping and making noise in the room.

“Y’get so sweet when I’m fuckin’ you,” Harry praises, tweaking her nipple as she wets his cock even more than before.

He speeds up, sweat beading down his temple, he curses and grunts, “Gonna give y’a baby, give you anythin’.”

And when they finally slow to a halt, catching their breath, he whispers in a syrupy soft voice, “You’re my everything.”

[rachetmath]

Me vs Jaune and RWBY Fandom

Longest skit. Read at your own time. As usual it’s in my opinion. Roasting is included.  Commit if  you want to. Don’t care. 

Me burying a RWBY Fan.

Jaune Fan: Hey man why are you burying a Rwby fan?

Me: Oh because I don't want high expectations. So, I making sure they don't give me positive vibes.

Jaune Fan: What?! Be excited man! I mean Jaune-

Me: Jaune isn't going to do shit.

Jaune Fan: But he killed Penny. I mean he's got play an important role in volume 9.

Me: Maybe in a fight with Neo or helping the main characters but screen time wise.... yeah, not a chance. In all honesty I got to admit Unicorn of War and Judgmental Critter have a point. Jaune should not have killed Penny nor be on island with team RWBY. He should be in Vacuo. With his team.

Jaune Fan: Come on man how could that be better?

Me: Okay hear me out. Jaune should've went to Vacuo because;

1.       It's filled with warriors. Warriors who carry guns, swords, shields or a variety of weaponry. Not much technology. Where the only thing that matters is strength. Something Jaune does not have.

2.       Tyrian has gone to Vacuo. He will be there with Mercury. So finally, after teasing us, they can finally give us an answer on why Tyrian was interested in Jaune in the first place. Could it be Tyrian is the reason Jaune couldn't enter a school? Could Jaune's father be the reason Tyrian got those injuries and Tyrian wants payback? Or Jaune and Tyrian are one of the same except Tyrian was betrayed by his friends and it made him insane. And he's trying to drag Jaune to his level. Why? I don't know.

3.       Jaune finally uses the Wind scar or Air slash whatever it was we saw in volume four. You know one thing we seen him train to use. The one thing that can grant him a long distant attack. The one we were hype to see. Or at least a better way to use his semblance.

Jaune Fan: ... Okay that’s... kind of fair. But Jaune will-

Me: Jaune will be on the island;

1.       Getting yelled at by Rwby. Even though Penny asked him to kill her. But they don't know. Maybe Weiss does but will that stop them?

2.       Healing team RWBY when they're hurt.

3.       Defeating or Redeeming Neo; even though Neo has no redeeming qualities and Jaune stands 0 to whatever chance against her.

Jaune Fan: Well, Jaune's team will have to function without him. They could-

Me: Team NERO;

·         Nora is a lightning rod who gets stronger when electricity courses through her vanes.

·         Emerald is a master of illusions who can change herself and everyone around her.

·         Ren is a ninja. Not a very good ninja but still.

·         And Oscar well you know why he's special.

Tell me does that sound like a good and affective team.

Jaune Fan: It is. It is a very good team.

Me: And guess what, Nora could be the leader. She'll have plenty of time to figurer herself out. Hell, I'll bet she could do better job than Jaune.

Jaune Fan: True.

Me: Let's face it man, Jaune should've have gone to Vacuo considering it's big on warriors and power is everything. And power is something Jaune doesn't have. Imagen, they put in hospital when he wants to fight, and they say no because he's weak. And Tyrian, we can finally understand why Tyrian is so invested in Jaune and maybe motivate him to get stronger. Instead, Jaune is with team RWBY because RWBY is so dumb, they'll get hurt easily and they need a doctor to help them. Team RWBY are incapable of taking care of themselves. Also, they used Penny to make up for Pyrrha's death even though Jaune just got over it two volumes ago. They didn't do a good job on it either and it ended up being a waste of time. And Jaune barely knew and never talked to Penny once. Basically, Eruption fang statement was proven fact, the show royally screwed Jaune over.

Jaune Fan: But volume 7 and 8? Surely you liked his character then.

Me: Yes. I did. I enjoyed seeing Jaune being serious. I loved the fact that he was doing something other than being depressed but human. However, they were shut down by the other characters actions.

Jaune Fan: Like what?

Me: Jaune cheated Beacon. We only seen him tell Pyrrha. How the fuck did Ren get that information?

Jaune Fan: Yeah, that was random as hell. Plus, the hunters death rate is insane.

Me: Jaune wanted to save Oscar over thousands of people. He got captured by the Ace-ops along with his team and had to be decoys at risk of being blown to pieces. Only for Oscar to save himself with help from Hazel and Emerald. When really, he could have just return to Mantle. Help as many people as he can. May returns with a ship and he takes it. Goes to battlefield, makes a deal with Winter, fights Hazel and saves Oscar himself. Hell he should’ve recruited Emerald considering she’s done more damage to him than anyone.

Jaune Fan: But Hazel-  

Me: Okay. Listen did Oscar or Ozpin give Hazel a solid reason to switch sides.

Jaune Fan: Well no. Other than his sister. Plus, they couldn't prove it.

Me: Yeah, so let me say this. What does Jaune and Hazel have in common?

Jaune Fan: Um. Oh. Oh...

Me: Yeah. Weather Ozpin intended to or not, Pyrrha and Gretchin both died due to his imprudence. But here's where their differences come together. Jaune still fights against Salem even knowing she's a immortal. Does he like Ozpin? No. Does he care about Oscar? Yes. I mean volume six he swallowed his pride and searched for the damn kid! Volume seven, he went and searched for Oscar, hell he protected him from Neo better than Yang protecting her own sister!

Jaune Fan: She push her out the way.

Me: She. Has. A. Gun.

Jaune Fan: Okay chill. Go on.

Me: Unlike Jaune, Hazel killed people. He doesn't protect anybody besides Emerald. Who was also on Salem’s team. Hell, I don't think he sees a difference between Oscar and Ozpin. Hell, after all the people he's killed, what made Oscar the exception? All because he said Jinn's name?

Jaune Fan: Because he told the truth.

Me: What truth? The information Hazel already knew. Also, truth doesn't always set you free. In fact it normally makes your situations worse. Hazel still had no legit reason to let Oscar go. Plus, he could have tested that out himself and Hazel already found Oscar to be a coward. Why not have Jaune fight Hazel? Especially if it's about "Who handles loss better? The knight who has both will and strength to take the pain. And still willing to fight the good fight. Or the giant, who may have an incredible will power and strength, but can't feel pain at all. Yet one who fights for evil.” Especially if it is deciding Oscar's fate. Life or death.

RWBY fan: Hey asshole.

Me: Oh my god.

RWBY fan: First off, he isn't a main character.

Me: How come? He's been in the show for years along with Ren and Nora. In fact, hasn’t he suffered more than the main character.

RWBY fan: But Yang's a main protagonist. And Hazel one of the main antagonists. As such they must fight.

Me: Why?

RWBY fan: Because Yang has a sister.

Me: Who is still alive.

RWBY fan: Her mom-

Me: One is dead and the other left her the moment she gave birth to that hypocritical monster. As far as I am concern both mothers abandoned her both literally and figuratively.

RWBY fan: Um well...

Me: Matter of fact Yang's a main character but what has she done exactly? What did she contribute other than her big mouth? One that she could be using to finally make Bumblebee canon.

Rwby fan: ... ... ...

Jaune Fan: Come on man, chill.

Me: She doesn't even spend time with Oscar. In fact, Jaune has more screen shots with Oscar than Yang does. Plus isn't it Jaune's fault Oscar was brought to the battlefield in first place. The reason he got shot and went missing again. And kidnapped! Especially when Ren started doubting his judgement. Having Jaune make up for all that but instead he takes no responsibility whatsoever! Hell, Hazel isn’t even main antagonist. He is replaceable. Just like Salem and Watts.

RWBY fan: ... ...

Jaune fan: So Jaune could've had a character... but better.

Me: I mean he still can have a character, but he needs screen time and better writing. Just like everyone else. Instead, the writers shaft him and forget about him until he's placed in a situation, he didn't even need to be in. Or probably could've fixed. But they however set him up to fail or waste time with him. I've accepted Penny's death because either way she was going to die. But the fact that healing her was still on the table, makes it sound like Penny just gave up and wanted death after seeing her girlfriend fall into abyss.

RWBY fan: Well damn man.

Jaune fan: Okay what would’ve you changed?

Me: Have Weiss fall with Blake. Let Ruby, Jaune and Penny fight Cinder. Cinder still fatally wounds Penny and Ruby tries to help her, giving Cinder a chance to kill them both. She fires a blast, Jaune blocks it, but it caused his aura to break. With amplification out the picture, Jaune can’t help Penny so he tells Ruby to go so she can get Penny to safety. Cinder not willing to let her enemies and the winter maiden's power get away, tries to stop them, but Jaune holds her off.

Jaune and RWBY fan: So Jaune take the ass whipping instead of Weiss.

Me: Yes, because unlike Weiss, Jaune has beef with Cinder and fought her once.

Rwby fan: But Cinder hurt Winter.

Me: Fuck Winter. For how dirty Weiss did her, she was lucky her sister was even breathing. Let only work with her.

Jaune fan: He’s not wrong. She was doing a lot of bull shit.

Me: Penny stops and tells Ruby to kill her. Ruby refuses but Penny explains to her that she won't make it. Ruby tries as she might to reassure Penny she will make it. But Penny stated, “it's time.” Penny, knowing Ruby doesn't want the maiden's power, explains that she can still transfer the power to someone else. But she needs Ruby to kill her. Ruby, with tears falling down her eyes, tries to reason with Penny but she wasn't having it. Basically, Penny gives Ruby two options her or Jaune. Who do think Ruby will have to choose?

RWBY fan: Simple Penny.

Me: ... ... ... ...

Jaune Fan: ... ... ...

RWBY fan: ... What?

Me: She grabs her Cresent Rose and shoots Penny in the head. Both Jaune and Cinder heard the shot and were in complete shock. Mainly Jaune, as he saw Ruby on her knees with tears of horror and sorrow as she killed her friend. Cinder, furious at what Ruby did, attempts to kill her only to now have Winter to deal with. Winter, after seeing Penny's lifeless body and Ruby stained with her blood, knows what went down. She then orders Jaune to get Ruby and himself out of the domain. Jaune goes to Ruby and snaps her out of her phase for now as they both ran for the portal. Cinder, now tired of them both, attempts to get rid them. Jaune even after getting his sword broken and beat beyond measure still protects Ruby. Ruby having enough of her friends getting hurt decides to protect Jaune by pushing him out the way while giving him her Cresent Rose. Ruby then was tossed and fell into abyss leaving Jaune paralyzed as he tried and failed to save her.

Jaune Fan: Oh my gosh wasn't that Winter's scene.

RWBY fan: Don't steal from the queen!

Me: Fuck Winter. Bitch hasn’t done shit in volume seven or eight that even matters. She’s lucky she even got maiden powers.

RWBY fan: Damn.

Me: Cinder then taunts Jaune saying, "Once again the fool who doesn't know when he's out of his league." Jaune becomes enrage was about to fight Cinder and she was willing to oblige. However, Salem was coming as they both heard her screams from the other side. Jaune didn't care but Winter stops him. Winter, being the adult, states they need to go and Jaune mentions "I swear- I swear I will you make pay for this. For everything you done! On my life as an Arc, I promise, I will kill you!" Cinder smiles and flew away as Jaune and Winter raced towards the portal. Winter gets through with no problem however Jaune after seeing how Ruby uses her weapon, many times, fires a round and launches himself through, making it to Vacuo.

Jaune Fan: Damn.

RWBY fan: That makes a little bit of sense. Ruby goes to the island but unarmed, increasing the stakes with Neo. She gets development because her action caused more harm than good. Jaune gets his own development and to his character no less. Wow.

Me: Keep your hype to a minimum and just see what happens.

Jaune Fan: I understand. Good luck.

Me: You too bro-bro. And you?

Rwby fan: No- no I'm leaving.

[zodiacrant]

🍩My experiences with each Moon sign🍩

(Cause yall are messy)

I have done this a few times before but for Sun signs and did rank placements but never shared my thoughts and experiences with the Moon signs.

Now I know how this goes, so if you get mad or sad then go off I guess. Aint the first time I get cursed out or attacked in this bitch. Plus, I am a Cap moon so naturally I won’t do well with some Moons and I will be nitpicking everything about everyone.

🍩Aries Moon🍩

My dad’s moon. Yup, that tells you alot without me even starting. Having our Moons in Square shit was hard to say the least. It took a long time for us to be on middle grounds and because I don’t feel comfortable talking about my problems here I will continue on. The Aries Moon that I really like and can think of is Rihanna, so I would say it’s unfair to make a whole judgment but from what I saw and heard they’re not exactly the best to be around. So I give them a 3/10 for being bold and having nerve.

🍩Taurus Moon🍩

Now this Moon right here I know people from ( a close friend and my sister, plus some others) and I don’t have many strong opinions about it. As a Taurus Sun, it can be a challenge to work with a Taurus Moon. I am stubborn at my core and they’re stubborn with their heart, so everytime we disagree it’s like a rope pulling contest. Way too stagnant for me but I think that’s because of my other placements and they don’t take any advice or open up no matter what. On to the good, I never disliked someone with this placement. No matter how much of an asshole they can be, to me it is difficult to hate them or stay mad at them. They’re warm, kind, and sweet but a bit aloof and naive, also they don’t like to touch and hug as some people might think. I will give them a 8/10

🍩Gemini Moon🍩

(⚠️TW⚠️ mention of rape and erratic behavior)

I only had one best friend with this placement and I don’t I want to meet any more, and I am at peace with that if they resemble her in any way. She was a maniac. She loved to lie, create drama, blow shit up, act crazy and basically be shocking. I do find similarities with Gemini Sun where they do shit for reactions but with her, she will take it to the next level. Lie about being raped, act possessed, or pretend that she is being followed. It’s not fair to associate her with people who share the same Moon as her but that was y’all’s representation in my life. She was erratic so it’s difficult to see where her Moon was in effect and where she was just off. I’ll give them a 1/10, would not recommend until proven otherwise.

🍩Cancer Moon🍩

The first that comes to my mind is Taylor Swift and to me she is the ultimate Cancer Moon. It juat makes sense how fast she takes it to the next level with people. Whether getting serious quickly with someone or throwing down and feuding. She just always at a 100. Personally, I never got close with someone who has this placement, maybe it’s because I am a Capricorn Moon myself, but I would say the ones that I have met were nice. I’ll give them a 5/10

🍩Leo Moon🍩

I only had one best friend with this placement but the people I have met with this Moon I still remember. They all had one thing in common and that was being emotionally traumatized and have lost one parent. My best friend was super loyal, very confident in what they believed in and represented, were always there for me and had an amazing ability in motivating others. But they were also super prideful and there’s no coming back with them. Fight once and it’s over. (Yes I am looking at you Jonnie). One of the other people was with me in uni and always had the to urge won up me and my friend. He had scars all over and he doesn’t remember how he got them. But he was super proud of himself and his home country, which I respect and admire. I’ll give them a 6/10

🍩Virgo Moon🍩

I know two people with this placement, my mom and a professor at uni, and oh boy it makes sense that they’re a Virgo Moon. Me and my mom are too alike that we clash strongly at times. She thinks she can do it better and I think I can do it better and we just have like a competition on who done it better basically. From cooking, to how you light the stove, to how you put on clothes, to how you lay down on bed. Both my mom and my professor are super critical and precise, althogh my professor is a double Virgo (Sun and Moon) so she will go even further. They have to do everything as it arises and act like there’s no time and everything is about to go wrong. Like damn sis chill the fuck out for a sec and this is coming from a Cap moon so you know it’s bad. But I really like Virgo Moon, even though people might hate such a personality but I can relate to them in some ways. I’ll give them 7/10

🍩Libra Moon🍩

My only online friend that I talk to all the time got this Moon. Other than her I met only two people and they were something. Okay so for my friend, because I never actually have seen her physically with my own eyes I can’t say how she acts all the time, but she is one of the best listeners I had in my life. She likes to hear me ramble for an hour about a dumb encounter that lasted a second, talking about astrology and some nerdy things and then not so nerdy things. I believe that it’s a Libra Moon quality to be emotionally versatile and attentive. I think because she is a Leo dominant she acts much fiery and fiercely than a Libra would. As for the other people I just thought they were fake. One acted as a friend but then would just disappear so I was over it quickly and the other was super passive and pretentious that I think she shits out plastic. All in all I think it’s a great Moon. I’ll give them a 7/10

🍩Scorpio Moon🍩

One of the hardest Moons I ever delt with but I find that I love them too. My oldest sister had this Moon and she is such a mystery. Because I am a Taurus Sun, it is only natural for me to have a hard time with a Scorpio Moon. Even though she is an extrovert, she rarely talks about herself and her feelings, you will never catch her slipping or show vulnerability. I can see how difficult it may be for her being a Cancer with a Scorpio Moon and have Gemini dominance. But she’s a bitch at heart and I am cool with it. I’ll give them 5/10 cause I am not a big fan of paradoxical people

🍩Sagittarius Moon🍩

A moon that I always babysat. I had two best friends with this Moon and if I was born a second earlier, it would mine too. I don’t know if it’s because of my Gemini Venus or my 0 degree Capricorn Moon but I love Sagittarius Moons. I was fortunate to see some of their weaknesses and for them to trust me enough to be vulnerable. But boy do they get themselves into the dumbest situation because they wanted to see what would happen. I had to babysit them and help them do everything like shopping, cooking, cleaning, assembling furniture, be their body guard when buying weed. (Shhhh it’s a secret). They’re in many ways immature cause they run from things and everytime you try to be real with them, they say “stop being negative”. I’ll give them a 9/10

🍩Capricorn Moon🍩

The grande dame of the Moon signs, sitting at it’s opposite planet. I have met many Cap Moons and honestly we are bitches 😂. The energy of sitting next to a Capricorn Moon is too fucking much like I never knew it’s like that. I noticed the way they stare, talk, walk and sit can be so aggressive and intimidating. I see why people might label us as bullies, cause the energy is definitely there and I myself was such a cunt (still a little but I am more aware of myself now) that I get where both are coming from. Life as a Capricorn Moon is emotionally flat. If wasn’t for my other placements you will never see me even flinch. I think we just take everything and let it process in our head before we let it into our hearts. So to me, we’re not mean, we just don’t see how something might be hurtful. But also that tone and that blank face, goddam! That’s why I try to smile cause bitch no, I didn’t know I was walking with a death stare this whole time. Anyways, I will give us 10/10 cause I am self appreciative like that 😂✌️

🍩Aquarius Moon🍩

I have always tried to understand Aquarius Moon and it was only a month ago that I have realized they themselves are not sure of who they’re. I had one best friend with this placement and three cousins (all siblings). First, my cousins are super competitive with each other on who gets to do what and if it happens that they’re similar in something they will get pissed. The person that was my best friend was like that as well. Only he would drop a an entire hobby, interest, something close to his heart, shit even a personality trait. I find them to be constantly changing and trying, so they shift between one end of extreme to the other until they center themselves. I’ll give them a 4/10

🍩Pisces Moon🍩

Now let’s talk about a depressing placement, in my opinion of course 😅. I don’t know if it’s the influence of Neptune on the Moon or is it the just the demeanor of Pisces, but good god girl get a grip (they call this the five G’s). My youngest sister is a Pisces Moon, and as creative as she is, she is pessimistic and overly cynical. I mean I am all for being critical and real but looking at everything with jacked up black sprayed glasses is just too much for me. Other than my sister I don’t know any Pisces Moon very well but I had a few acquaintances. I noticed that they talked about a specific thing and that’s it. I have found them to be amazing at drawing, painting and have an incredible artistic sense. At times twisted and dark, but I love the art that comes with it. I’ll give them a 5/10

Here’s the tea. It’s Pisces season so remember I am sensitive right now, and also it’s my life and I wish I met someone as amazing as you might think you’re. (Maybe that was a little too aggressive)

Okay love you ❤️

[yan-twst]

hi! could i please request yan azul, kalim, leona and malleus with their darling figuring out abt them,, yknow being yanderes and trys to flat out look and act unappealing and/or just basically be the opposite of what theyd want in a s/o, as an attempt to try and get them off their back?? 

warnings: general yandere themes, mentions of physical violence

azul ashengrotto

the problem with azul’s attraction is that it comes from his own insecurities rather than him attaching to some aspect of his darling

perhaps they somehow reassured him when he was feeling low, perhaps they accidentally said something that soothed his insecurities- maybe it was something as simple as them always being nice to him without him ever having done anything for them; once he first gets an inkling of interest, it snowballs into an obsession and a desire to have them reassure him and keep him company

his darling starts to notice something is off when azul suddenly seems to be almost always pestering them to form a contract with him, when they can feel the tweel’s eyes on them throughout the day. it- it feels wrong to say he’s stalking them, but fuck, it sure feels like it

every day it seems to increase a little- the stalking, the pressuring, the way he’s trying to force himself closer to them, and it feels like a ticking time bomb. it’s as if every day they put off a contract or avoid him, the pressure’s building up, but they don’t know to what. but they can tell that if this goes on for longer, something is going to happen

azul notices when they stop taking as much care of themselves. they’re disheveled, hair messy and uniform wrinkled; not something bad enough that they’d get in trouble, but just so enough that it seems they’re actively trying to appear “unappealing”. too bad for them, though; in his love-addled mind, he dreams of them holding him, caressing him and telling him he’s loved, he’s good- the fact they’re not put together doesn’t affect him that much

of course, if they realize that what azul is fixated on is how they treated him and try to do the opposite of that- being rude to him, then that’s just making things go worse. azul was obsessed with them before, yes, but once they start acting rudely to him it just makes him snap

no more waiting. he was trying to get them tied up in a contract, lure them in until they were too far in and couldn’t leave him; but once they burst his little bubble by being rude to him, once they snap the fantasy version of them in his head (the fantasy version of them that’s always at his beck and call, always reassuring them and telling him how great he is, that adores all he does with no questions)- he’s suddenly craving their kindness again, and he doesn’t care how he has to get it

that really might be a fast route to getting dragged by floyd into a dorm room- azul’s room- and be confronted with a desperate azul

suddenly bombarded with questions- why did they do this? is he not enough? did they find someone else? it’s that bastard who sits next to them, isn’t it? what does he have that azul doesn’t? he can take it from him- he can be better than that guy, he promises! why isn’t he enough? why don’t they love him? why why why why-

it’s dizzying, and they realize just a bit too late the door is locked- and it’s going to stay that way. azul might regain his composure, but going back to his usual self from his little crybaby side doesn’t mean he’s suddenly letting them go; no matter in what state he’s in, making them his is all he has on his mind

kalim al-asim

the problem with kalim is that it’s so hard to tell his love is something far worse, far more dangerous, bordering into obsession until it’s too late

he’s just so naturally loving and affectionate; it’s not weird for him to always invite the same person over, not weird for him to be hugging them, it just doesn’t raise any alarms for him to shower them in expensive gifts that they didn’t ask for, it’s just not unusual for him to compliment them so sweetly every time he sees them

after all, he’s just known for being adorable and sweet and nice. if anything, onlookers might think he has a puppy crush and find the whole thing adorable

hell, outside of the discomfort of receiving so many expensive gifts, the target of his obsession probably also thinks it’s just some passing fancy, just another demonstration of his big heart and his boundless kindness

but it’s just a little too much. the hugs last a second too long, it’s just too many gifts- where the hell do they safely put all this gold? it’s too much time spent in scarabia’s common room being hugged and pet and coddled by kalim

perhaps the kindest way to make him back off is to just not appeal to him, right? to be just a little bit cold, to look a bit worse for wear than the average student- surely that’ll be enough to dissuade him, to make him lose interest and maybe focus his attention on something else

but it doesn’t really work. trying to even give a cold shoulder to his affections makes kalim so visibly sad it hurts them (even though they’re the ones trying to make distance between him and them), their disheveled appearance makes him fuss and worry and pay even more attention to them

if the plan was to get kalim off their back, then it backfires completely. he’s suddenly just that much more attached to them; he doesn’t seem to take their cold treatment as a dissuasion, and he gifts care products and clothes and jewelry saying that perhaps they need a little pick-me-up

it just culminates in him “worrying too much” and “taking the decision to care for them, since they’re clearly unwell!”- which translates to being put in a private room in the scarabia dorm for kalim to pamper

he seems to chalk up their distress and their absolute anger at his actions as them “being unwell”. is it the school stress, or something else...? well, it’s ok! he’s taking care of them now; they’re not gonna have to work a day in their life or stress over anything at all, because he’s going to stay with them forever. that’s what love is, after all!

leona kingscholar

what a ridiculous little herbivore

do they truly think he can’t tell what they’re doing? leona knows he isn’t subtle about his little crush, as ruggie calls it- he isn’t stupid enough to deny the obsession that swirls in his heart and raises all his animalistic instincts when he’s in the presence of his darling. he knows they’re worried about how he’s monopolizing their time, that they’re keenly aware he’s trying to keep them for himself

but do they really think that they can somehow drive him away by switching up the way they act? that if they try to put on a brave stance, try to act as if though they aren’t a little weak herbivore for the big mean lion to hunt down for dinner, that he’s just going to shrug and move on?

if his obsession was something so minor, he wouldn’t be putting in the effort to secure his prey. really, how dumb do they have to be to think it’d be that easy? they know him- they know he wouldn’t be putting energy into this whole thing if he didn’t truly want to

leona isn’t stupid. he can see right through them; he’s had his eye on them for a while now, and all of a sudden they’re trying to change up the way they are? he can easily figure out what they’re trying to do

in fact, he might bring it up to their face- looking down at them with a smirk arms crossed

just because the prey tries to act brave doesn’t make it any less of a prey animal. he can sniff them out without trying.

really, it’s about then leona just says ‘fuck it’ and pounces. it’s as easy as saying that if they don’t nicely follow him back to savanaclaw he’ll gladly turn them to sand, with his hand pressed against their back- and that’s all it takes for the brave act to crumble and for the lion to force the rabbit into his den

even if once held captive they keep trying to act unappealing, leona sees it as amusing and perhaps as a bother he can quickly get rid of with a bit of force or punishment. cats like to play with their food, after all: he might let them try to keep up the act for a while, just for his amusement, but once he says they’re done and to drop it, they better drop it, because he isn’t above letting them learn through pain that they aren’t in charge of themselves here

malleus draconia

catching on that malleus draconia might be a bit too interested in them is a bit of an unnerving discovery- because what does one do when the most powerful student in nrc and the heir to the throne of the valley of thorns is a bit too into one? 

it doesn’t help that malleus is just not very socially adept, and it feels... cruel to tell him off. maybe it’s just the way he makes friends- perhaps showing up to their dorm unannounced is just him being friendly, perhaps him just staring at them is how he thinks friendship goes, maybe the extended physical contact is just him being touch starved

it’s just tricky, because what can they do? malleus is powerful and he’s very, very much attached to them. perhaps it’s their fault for letting it get to this level, but they just thought the guy needed a friend; they were trying to be nice, to offer him companionship, and now they’ve got a fae watching them sleep, talking about how they’d be a perfect co-ruler for the valley of thorns, glaring at their friends when they spend time together; it’s a problem

and yet what to do? trying to make malleus “not attracted to them” is easier said than done. after all, what seems to have gotten him so attached is the fact they treat him nicely, that they weren’t scared of him- and they’ve seen malleus spit fire and use magic so powerful they can only dream of it. they don’t want to just go ahead and upset him by suddenly being mean.

and trying to put him off with their appearance just doesn’t seem to work either. if anything, it just makes him that more overbearing; as if he’s worried about their behaviour

there’s no way to win, really. they can try to keep going this way, as his obsession grows more and more each day and he starts to take more and more from them, eventually declaring his “love”, eventually placing them in a tower, trapped with him- no amount of messy hair and poorly ironed clothes can make the lovesick obsession leave malleus; and the alternative is to potentially anger him, to make the move from their dorm to a cold, stone room somewhere in the dorm for malleus to unleash his anger and the worse parts of his obsession onto them

[life-rewritten]

Fish Upon the Sky Episode 1-7 (The Problems with Walls; An analysis on Duen and Pi)

I swear, if I could just settle down, stop running away and actually analyse FUTS the way I usually do. I would have so many essays by now on how authentic and deep this show can get with some of its characterisations. As I  write this FUTS essay that has constantly been plaguing me and making me frustrated that no one else is seeing these themes, I realise again sadly how this director has sadly failed to show the vision of what he wanted for the series.  An essay on how DuenMeen and MorkPi mirror each other so much with their themes, it sounds crazy to think that they do because their storylines on the surface seem different at times. Still, also their love interests act differently towards them, and they have different dynamics with them. But that's what's so great about meta and mirroring in TV, especially in shows that aren't meant to be seen as deep or purposely filled with hints and clues to break down. Fish upon the Sky is one of those shows. It struggles to find a balance between wanting to be more profound and showing exciting themes vs pleasing and appealing to the audience, using humour and other exaggerated performances/narratives to do so. However, the writer of Fish upon the sky novel has always had her works struggle with these issues and themes. Jittirain always writes emotional stories about unrequited love, with different lessons, ideas, or characterisations that people fail to understand or truly value because the meta/depth of their personalities is hidden or misunderstood by their own directors. This is what happened in  2gether; this is what also happened in Theory of Love.

A Misunderstood Duo

In order to really understand how grand the narrative the show is failing to truly flesh out is, you need to understand that Pi and Duen (the two main characters of the show) are the narrators of both their own stories. Pi's is Fish upon the sky whilst Duen is Leech upon the sky (😂😂) but what's great is that you can already see the mirroring/similarities just by their titles. Even though their insecurities and worries seem different, it's the same theme for them;  both struggle with love because they secretly have a lot of self-deprecation and hesitancy from how people have treated them. It's not as noticeable when you see Duen's characterisation/storyline, but if you truly focus on the themes of his narrative without being distracted by the loud comedic routine he has, you'd see that his biggest insecurity, that he tries to be defensive and act like he doesn't care about is his dumbness. He genuinely feels weaker/inferior because he's known as being dumb to everyone around him. He struggles to process anything that is complex and requires more depth or thought.  It's played for laughs because he relishes in the idea that people feel exasperated by his actions. He acts like he doesn't get bothered by how people perceive him because he's still seen as socially acceptable, unlike Pi, who's actually bullied and alienated from society because of his own 'flaws'.

But you can see that it's all a façade when it comes to Duen, just like with how Pi handles his own insecurities and trauma to do with his perceived flaws. It's why Duen chooses to lie to Meen that he's a dentist. He didn't want him to see him the same way others do. This already should show that he doesn't actually enjoy being seen as dumb, but he has walls up to make it seem like he doesn't care. He knows he's constantly being compared to others, but he can't change who he is (just like Pi didn't also want to change how he looked or acted to please people at first). So he jokes and tries to see a positive in being that way; he starts to want to slack off and cheat off others when it comes to work. He stops taking University seriously and repeats classes constantly because he always fails. That is until Meen shows up, and then he starts to want Meen to believe he's something more. Why?

But in case I haven't repeated it enough, Duen is like Pi, whose insecurity is easier to see since we watched him get attacked and bullied for it immediately in the first episode. It's Pi's true thoughts and opinions we see in the show as the audience, whilst Duen's story is hidden with comic relief and unseriousness. They both try to act like they're okay with what they are being judged by in society. Thus, they act confident, they're both loud, they're selfish, acting like they don't care how people see them. Preventing others from getting to hurt them by making it look like they are in control of what they have and use that to their own advantage with others.

They both stay heavily in denial about their true feelings in general, but primarily with the critical focus; the people who make them question everything about their flaws that come into their life and frighten them the most. The ones that break down those facades; make them automatically want to run away whilst being unable to stop showing and escaping their true feelings whenever they're in their presence.

The Use of Humour and Sarcasm 

So what we end up with is a narrative with two incredibly annoying and flawed characters who are seen in the audience as exaggerated caricatures for comic relief and shallow storytelling. And it's brilliant because both their unlikable/loud, selfish personalities are just fake walls built, so they don't crumble and get affected by how society views them or wants them to act. So you see, there's the issue that people keep misunderstanding about these two stories, especially about these two brothers. They're realistic; they're flawed because they've been affected by society and the environment around them. They're acting like how anyone who's been hurt before would act, they have built up walls, and they've decided to just stay by themselves and let that guide them in everything. They deal with their issues with sarcasm and humour to reduce the seriousness of the situation, so they don't appear weak or let anything hurt them.  

That's why I love this narrative of FUTS, it's meta and more profound than people think, but because the director doesn't do the best to show it, it can get lost in all the exaggerated humour. For example, with Pi, because he's socially anxious and always overthinks how people think of him (due to his past experiences of being abused and hurt by being ignorant of how people thought of him), his world is wildly exaggerated in his head. The way he narrates the story is played for laughs and is a very telling and realistic representation of how overthinking is expressed in his mind; it's overdone, loud and nonsensical at times. That's what social anxiety does; it makes you cry about one stare, one laugh, one action someone does, it makes you panic over the most minor things, and Pi does that with panic and boisterous, sarcastic humour from the start of the show.

Hence his story also has exaggerated humour because he deals with his issues with that fake jokes and sarcasm. So the show also exaggerated humour too when we are in his perspective.  This is actually similar to Duen's breaking the 4th wall narrative style of his storyline. As with Duen, whose narrator of his story mocks and laughs at his actions ironically. When really that is just literally himself fighting with his inner voice about his true feelings about Meen. He breaks the 4th wall because he's internalising his own emotions and dealing with them as a skit; the narrator is his true self ridiculing him for not accepting that he has feelings for Meen and that he's not as bright/cool as he thinks he is. So if we understand this and notice that the narrator makes fun of him constantly and jokes about his actions, you'll realise that Duen sees himself that way too; he sees himself as a joke. He doesn't see himself as suave and carefree; he actually mocks himself internally for being dumb and being gross.

Pi: The Need for Protection and Avoidance 

So already, just from breaking it down with this point of view, Duen and Pi mirror each other so well, and their narratives because of this focus on the same themes and ideas of self-discovery. Both are flawed characters with a lot of vulnerabilities and pain that they refuse to deal with properly. An id ego defence mechanism catalysed because of their past experiences and protection of their mental space. They both stay in denial, hurting who they love by refusing to let them get to see them without the walls down and more. Pi hates that he loses control with Mork and refuses to let Mork have his heart because he believes Mork is too good for someone like him secretly.  He knows he'll be the one damaged. Hence the choice to intentionally misinterpret his brother's metaphor on the vaccine analogy and view it as the complication with getting with Mork. Let me try and use this to break down his mindset with why he chose to still choose Nan even though he knows (he does know) that he wants to be with Mork romantically. Listen to the analogy his brother uses. He mentions the iatrogenic vaccine, a vaccine intended for a patient that starts helping the patient be well but actually causes more harm than good. The end result is because of the incompatibility of the vaccine and the time it takes for those results to show up in the patient and make their lives affected in a negative conclusion.

 A vaccine ironically is meant to be an antidote, something that saves people, that helps and makes them feel better. And that's what Mork says he wants to be for Pi, it's romantic, but once his brother announces a different version of a vaccine, Pi jumps with that analogy and believes that's the truth about Mork and him that makes sense to him, than seeing it positively. So with this analogy, we can break it down this way:

The Iatrogenic vaccine was too different and incompatible with the patient. Which is what Pi believes about Mork. Remember, Pi doesn't think  (because of what people have told him) that he deserves loyalty and love from people better looking/capable than him. He sees Mork in this light from the start; he views Mork as a rival because Mork is good looking, popular, strong and cool, basically things that are not associated with Pi to others.  So Mork and him are incompatible in Pi's mind.  This is why Pi constantly asks Mork why he wants to be close to him. He just doesn't understand it.  

Second, the Iatrogenic vaccine starts off good but causes damages in an irreparable way to the patient. It's the patient that ends up being affected by this vaccine interaction, not the vaccine that caused it. Before Wan starts this vaccine conversation, he discusses how people around his hospital are patients primarily because of heartbreak; they come in with damaged mindsets, broken hearts and self-harming injuries because of being hurt by love and letting themselves be vulnerable to that. All Pi hears is people hurt themselves over the pain of heartbreak and being abandoned. That's the complication if he does finally trust Mork. Especially after Mork and him get to be close, it'd be just like with everyone who has gotten to know him in the past, who stayed by his side as 'friends', once they learnt about him, what they said is that he wasn't worth being loyal to. So many people used and deserted him, and it almost broke him. This is why Pi grow the walls he has now. Even though Pi is chasing after Nan, he's not expecting an answer from Nan that's positive; Nan is a fantasy, something he can use as a goal to want to keep chasing and distracting himself from that singleness and loneliness he felt at the start of the show. This is why he's doing all of this; he just wants a distraction from the mess of his life. But to Pi, Mork? Mork is real. He's serious; he's someone who Pi actually truly will be damaged by if he's hurt and left by him; he's someone who Pi truly loves and is real to Pi, it's terrifying, and so he rather just avoid that because of the risk of a complication. To be that patient tricked by the vaccine and left to deal with those consequences all alone? Yeh, no, he can't do that.  Pi sees him as a friend and doesn’t want to end that because that's the first thing in a while that has made him feel actually happy being himself and accepted. Being friends with Mork makes him feel safe. So again, it's selfish, but it’s all about him preserving what he already has with Mork rather than damaging it.

Those complications are exactly that result if he lets Mork in romantically and Mork sees his true self and leaves like everyone; it’s not Mork who’d be hurt. It’s Pi who’d have nothing more to believe in if he lets himself be that vulnerable. Again Pi is thinking with his head when it comes to Mork; there’s a massive risk if someone takes the wrong vaccine, that person is damaged because of it. Pis journey with Mork is the same thought process that friends to lovers have. The fear of losing each other if they cross that line, of taking things too far and ruining the foundation they had that made them safe. The fear of the love being false as it always has been from others.  Pi thinks he likes Mork because how can he not? However, Mork is always there, making it hard for him to think. He associates Mork with niceness and protectiveness, but that doesn’t mean he has to accept him romantically, and Mork sees right through him and is fond of breaking down those walls he put so high up to ensure he doesn't get hurt again. Mork is the one pushing Pi further away from him the more he clings because Pi doesn’t like losing control. Same as Duen. And Mork doesn’t let him just figure it out without manipulating everything; the more he does that, the more Pi feels manipulated and tricked into wanting Mork as a partner, and that's too scary for Pi. This is why it’ll be massive when he finds out who Mork truly is on his phone as the guy from nearby faculty.

Duen: The Need for Nonchalance and Ignorance

Duen is the inversion with his storyline; he tries to look cool and better to Meen,  refusing Meen to see him when he's worried, anxious or insecure because he himself shuts off those emotions whenever Meen triggers them. He doesn't want to face the truth, that he hates being seen as dumb and not being seen as a hero to Meen. He lies to Meen because he's trying to keep him by his side without actually letting him see his true self. After all, if he does, he also may judge or leave him too (guess what same as Pi's worries with Mork. Mirroring!).  Duen tries to act unaffected just like Pi does with Mork because again, they both know once they break down and give in, there's no turning back, they will be exposed, and the' truth' about them (which they believe and see about themselves) will push the people they truly want by their sides away.

So instead, they grapple for control by faking lack of care and feelings for their partner; they refuse to apologise quickly and refuse to give in easily to them to further their relationships, increase their trust and let them in. They refuse to let go of their fake personas and fake masks and walls they've built and try hard to hold onto the facade, which hurts Meen and Mork in the end. They both push and pull and show signs of vulnerability and romance only when they're alone with no one else around (like the tent scene with MeenDuen and the after school night scene with MorkPi outside). They show worry, devotion, and they show that they want them by their side. And these are the moments when we actually get to truly see who they are without their walls, their fake personas unshed, and their niceness, their care and protectiveness over them exposed.

Wan: The Comparison and Norm

When we're first introduced to the show, Wan is mentioned almost immediately as we see Pi's struggles. Because of Wan's reputation, people choose to crowd around Pi, and it's sad, but I also think Duen also had this same issue, just a bit different. With Pi, it's about his outer appearance, his beauty standards vs society's. It's exposed to him he lacks those, but it's his intelligence similar to Wan that makes people stay by his side at first.  He also studies dentistry as Wan studied Medicine, viewed by societal standards as impressive and praiseworthy. Pi is used by people who want to both get to Wan and want to profit from his brain and abilities. Duen is the inverted version of this; he is seen as handsome and cool and aloof, a bit messy, but the reason why Meen first leaches onto him is his street smarts and survival skills with social interactions, he knows the right people, he is seen as cool by others including Pi, but he's also seen as dumb. He's failed repeatedly, unlike his brothers at trying to obtain a degree.  So he has the outer appearance but lacks the next valuable thing in society's opinion; brains and the ability to increase your status by your talents and skills. Duen lacks that; he doesn't have any specific things about himself that he can fully be proud of. He's not highly talented, he's not intelligent, and he's also not viewed by women as extremely attractive or awe-worthy. He nonchalantly takes on this persona; he chooses to block any worries about things being serious because he lacks the smarts to think of things deeply or ponder about life's questions.

He's insecure, however, about this, and you see it when he tries to join in with Wan and Pi when they discuss vaccines and love. As Pi transforms for Nan, his lie is that he's well of without other people in his life like Mork; he pretends he's okay being seen as loud, not friendly, selfish etc.  Duen's own lie to Meen is that he is a version of Wan, of what people think Wan is; intelligent, put together and reliable. Because what Duen wants from Meen all the time (he doesn't realise he already has this devotion from Meen for just being himself when he's not trying) is for Meen to want to rely on him since that's precisely what Meen keeps telling him he likes about him, or wants to learn from him; street smarts etc. Duen likes being seen as a protector, a hero, a helper etc., to Meen. And that's why he stays adamant with his lie and refuses to let Meen truly see him below the surface.

Like Pi, he also doesn't want to admit what he knows and has fought to accept, which is, he loves Meen and wants him by his side. It's the fear of losing what he has with Meen that makes him do what he does, which is the same reason Pi also keeps rejecting Mork; it's the fear of losing him. And that's the ironic thing about Pi and Duen, they're ironically trying to preserve what they love, but because of scars, insecurities and walls, they're hurting the ones they love by just refusing to be their authentic selves. It's ironic because they think being themselves is the worst option. Yet, on the surface, they act like they're fine with who they are, they're loud about being carefree of what others think of them, they're okay if these two leave them, but in reality, their worst fears are admitting that they agree with what people see in them as flaws, that they also hate themselves for that. That's heartbreaking because they fought so hard to keep loving themselves, to keep believing in their worth, but society made them genuinely think that they're wrong. And it's painful but realistic.

Again they're all similar and mirror each other. I just want people to understand that FUTS is a deep show; I know the director doesn't do the best job with what he's been trying to show, but it is deep; there is thought at times put to it in the profound moments. In the moments where both Pi and Duen aren't being fake and are their true selves, you'll notice that the jokes and humour slowly reduce whenever they are true; the narrator also reduces for Duen because he doesn't struggle as much with his feelings for Meen like he did at the first time. All the stuff that happens in the show is on purpose, even if done messily and poorly. People love to hate on the show. It has a lot of flaws, I know, but it's not the worst thing; it has deep characters that are incredibly flawed and hurt (even Mork, who we still hope will get to understand his story) it has people that act one way on the surface but hold deep scars and pains below whilst wearing a mask. The characters are unlikable because they are realistic to how people with self-sabotaging habits and deprecation act. That's why I like this show. And I'm sad I wasn't writing out more all about the meta and moments I've enjoyed so far. Anyway, I'm grateful this show has been shown this year; it definitely made me ponder my own ideas about how I view myself and if I have walls up around the people I love. I think many people do relate to Pi or Duen somehow, and it's unfortunate that the director doesn't help us feel the same way about the narrative when it's actually a great BL story to unravel and watch.

[sidespromptblog]

What to Do?: Chapter 6

One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten

Warnings: Angst, Remus Accurate Thoughts, and Hurt/Comfort.

Summary: Logan realizing that his first mistake was seeing the other sides as anything other than coworkers. They weren't a family. They didn't even like each other. How had he not realized sooner?

Word Count: 1,880

There was a moment where the silence felt like a ticking clock between the two of them, and then...

The moment of weakness was over in a second.

Virgil hastily jerked his shoulder away from Remus’ very touch so hard that the other side was sure that he nearly dislocated it with such a move, it didn’t stop Remus from raising an eyebrow at Virgil as the anxious side snarled at him. As if he wasn’t just weeping his eyes out moments ago, and as if Virgil hadn’t just looked at him like he was hoping that Remus held all the answers to his problems the moment he had appeared. 

“What do you want?!” The anxious side spat out, had he fur Remus was sure that it would have been bristling like a cat’s. “Why are you here? Didn’t you ruin enough?” 

Ouch.

That shouldn’t have hurt the way that it did, and yet… somehow coming from Virgil of all people, it stung in a way that dish soap could not. It was like… peroxide on a fresh scrape. Like it was bubbling and destroying each cell in its wake, not caring if it was bacteria or any normal cell trying to help. 

That’s what this pain felt like.  

For a second there was nothing to be said, not as he felt Virgil’s scorching heated glare that told him just how much the anxious side hated him in this moment. Although, for the life of him, he couldn’t tell if it was because he had seen Virgil in his moment of weakness, or… if Virgil was secretly grateful that he had come along when he did. Either way he could only blatantly stare at the other side for a moment, taking in how Virgil was holding himself, and just how he seemed to clutch at the papers Logan had given him like a lifeline so that he wouldn’t fall apart even more. 

Speaking of Logan though…

“I wanted to see this all for myself, and to see if Janus was right.” Remus didn’t know it was possible for Virgil to bristle even more at Janus’ name. “To be honest… It’s kind of weird to see that he’s right, I mean.. I didn’t think Janus was lying when he told me about it. But I was sure that he was exaggerating in how Logan treated him.” It perturbed him, which he hated, because nothing was supposed to perturb him. He wasn’t somebody who got perturbed by anything! He was Remus Sanders, he was the one who usually did the perturbing, so this.. this wasn’t at all fair. “With dearl old Logic like this it's very unsettling... even for someone like me.” 

For him it was almost impossible to not draw parallels to when it was him, Janus, and Virgil. And just like them, this felt all too similar to how Virgil was acting right before he left them, and as much as he liked to deny any sort of squishy feelings for the anxious side…

It was kind of hard for him to see it happening to Virgil in real time.

But be that as it may, “When it was you…” Virgil flinched, and even so Remus carried on. “There were plenty of warning signs that me and Janus missed and by the time that the point came around it was already too late to get you back.” 

Virgil glowered darkly at Remus, having a feeling that the creative side was trying to point him in some kind of way that he couldn’t exactly see just yet. He didn’t like the kind of game that Remus was attempting to play with him, he already didn’t have a lot of patience when it came to this side, and now with everything involving Logan he had even less of it now. A part of him just wanted to hear it straight up, without any kind of nostalgic twangs in Remus’ voice. But another part of him… Well the other part of him couldn’t help but to agree, he had given Janus and Remus plenty of signs that he was starting to grow tired and that he wanted out of what they were doing. And when they had missed them at every turn, as well as the light sides as well... 

He had simply decided to duck out, and save everyone the hassle of dealing with him in person. 

That little reminder did little to ease his ire though, “Just what are you trying to say?” He growled sharply, not liking this one little bit.

Virgil felt his stomach drop as soon as the smile curved onto Remus’ face like a knife.

“Simple,” The creative side said with a bout of fake cheer, “That you all had plenty of chances to help Logan before it got to this point. And just like me and Janus, you all failed miserably at doing anything worthwhile.” 

In an instant, Virgil rounded on Remus, his hands clenched into fists as a burning rage flooded his stomach and crawled up his throat. In that moment right then and there, he could have strangled Remus with his own stupid sash and he wouldn’t have felt bad for about it for a single second. His teeth bared themselves into a snarl, and without even thinking he took a step forward, almost talking himself into acting on the dark urge that made his hands want to move. 

Virgil was a little more than pissed, “What would you know about any of that?!” The words he had wanted to spit out, he ended up shouting instead. “What the hell would you know about helping someone?! What would you know about making things better?!” His voice shook the pictures on the wall, but he didn’t care. He didn’t care that the others could hear him, and he didn’t care about the weird look of guilt on Remus’ dumb face. The only thing he cared about was pounding his frustrations through Remus’ stupidly thick skull until he finally understood and got it for once. 

Since when had Remus ever cared about helping other people? Since when did he ever extend a thought that just wasn’t about himself, or making someone else’s day even worse? Since when did he care about anything that went beyond tormenting others with his weird thoughts, and the nightmares that he regularly gave to Thomas? Since when did Remus actually have single solitary thought that wasn’t going to hurt them in some kind of way?

As if reading his mind Remus extended his hand in an uncharacteristically placating manner, “Plenty.” He merely says, “Plenty…” Remus says, with a surprising amount of calmness. “I have regretted it every day of my life,” Here Virgil went still, the momentous amount of seriousness in Remus’ voice deserved that much at least. “I have always regretted that I didn’t do a single thing to stop you from leaving and even more that I didn’t help when you needed me to.” For a second he hesitated, delaying and deliberating on what he knew he was going to have to say next to Virgil. “And… I feel that this is also somewhat my doing too…” 

It wasn’t that he was scared, far from it. 

It was that… if he told Virgil what he knew and what he had done, that would be owning up to all of this. And that in some way all of the others could pin this on him, and not the fact that they too could have helped Logan not make the choices that he had made. 

“How?” Virgil tiredly asked, “How could it possibly be your fault? You just said that we didn’t pay enough attention to his warning signs. I know that you were a dick to him recently, but I don’t understand how this is your fault…” 

Remus’ fleshy insides softened at Virgil’s words, and at how much the anxious side seemed to want to absolve him of any kind of guilt. It was sickeningly sweet in his eyes, like Virgil knew he couldn’t absolve himself, so he could in the very least do it to Remus. 

But it needed to come out.  

He had to tell someone. 

So, taking in a steadying breath he went on. 

“I gave him the nudge,” He finally blurted out, he had never been one to keep secrets. So the truth had been pressing inside of him, like a stuffed animal full of too much stuffing. And upon seeing equally Virgil’s bewildered and shocked stare, and clearly not understanding what he was talking about. He went on before neither he or Virgil could stop himself from elaborating. “He was in the imagination after the fiasco of my plans had fucked everything up, he was angry, and sad, and just upset. I could tell that he was feeling a lot of things because clearly no one was listening to him, I.. I had ensured it when I ruined his schedule. And I had thought that he would just shrug the thought I gave him off, or he’d know that it was me…” Remus floundered for a moment, the taste of guilt strange on his tongue, “ I had only suggested that things couldn’t continue like they were, nothing else. But he…” 

But Logan had gone with it, and hadn’t stopped for a single second.

Then everything else had happened. 

He had not meant for the idea he had given Logan to get so out of hand, he was impressed, sure, that Logan was actually taken to it and was making the changes he wanted to see happen. And he was definitely impressed that he had broken under the weight of Virgil’s and the others’ woes certainly… but seeing Janus go numb on him, and seeing Virgil absolutely bawling his eyes out…

Seeing how Logan had reacted to Virgil of all people had made him so obviously apparent to the major flaw in what he had wanted to happen, he had thought, and hoped, that the others would apologize, change, and that Logan would go back to normal. 

He had thought that just once he had helped, but… 

“I don’t think that he’s going to stop anytime soon…” 

It was a lot harder than he had thought that it would be, and it was even harder to see it happening to people that he knew and cared about. 

Looking down at the anxious side he feared for just a moment that Virgil was going to explode on him again. That this time he’d actually lunge forward and wrap his hands around Remus’ throat, and choke the daylights out of him for causing all of this. He knew that Virgil had thought about it, hell every time he talked and caused trouble he could tell that it was something Virgil wanted to do to him.   

But Virgil had gone dead silent, the look on his face unreadable by Remus.  

“Help me fix this,” Virgil finally whispered, his body finally loosening as his fists unclenched, no longer full of murderous rage. “If you want so badly to help… then help me fix this.” After a second finally adding, “Please.”

That was something at least, no even more than that…

It was a start. 

A better start than he deserved.  

[div-divington]

big ol’ invicncible spoilers, watch the show first trust me you’re not missing anything if you don’t read this post

I’ve never talked about a cartoon or tv show before but I’ve gotta say that people who say there’s ‘no complexity’ to Omni-Man’s character just tick me off.

I mean, listen, he’s totally a villain at least in the cartoon adaptation (I’ve not read the comics, going to consider them separate entities for the sake of argument), but he’s far from a two dimensional sussus amogus imposter blindly readying the planet for invasion.

I whole-heartedly believe that Omni-Man enjoyed being a superhero, saving lives. I believe his friendship with the tailor guy was real, I believe he respected, admired even, the Guardians of the Globe, cherished his relationship with Debbie, and enjoyed living among humans. The brief interaction with Darkwing and The Immortal when the Mauler Twins attack the White House is so sincere right? Like, it seems to me he respects them, the jokey “you’re welcome” when he saved Darkwing, the “I had him” when he saved the guard Immortal was going for, that wasn’t necessary of him. He had no real reason to be playful and cordial with them, he could have been distant and still gained their trust easily (I mean, Darkwing was a jerk and they loved him). The brief moment of shock and unresponsiveness when Mark revealed that he’d finally gotten his powers? I honestly believe that was a moment of disbelief. I think he hoped Mark’s powers wouldn’t manifest, hoped he wouldn’t have to continue his mission. That pause was him coming to terms with the end of things. The realization that he would have to hurt people he respected, finish his mission, and end his time as a father, author, and superhero.

When he collapses after murdering the Guardians of the Globe, the look on his face isn’t just exhaustion from the fight, it looks to me like shock. Disbelief. I don’t think he wanted to kill the Guardians, I think he hated doing it, but it’s what he was bred for. He was born and trained from childhood for thousands of years to weaken a planet from within, prepare it for invasion. Earth had superheroes, naturally a pretty noteworthy obstacle for an invasion, so he, in his mind, had no choice but to kill them. And notice that most of his kills are pretty... clean? He goes right for Immortal’s head, ditto with Aquaris and Green Ghost, snaps War Woman’s neck, kills Darkwing in one clean move, tears off Martian Man’s heart(? is that a heart?), crushes Red Rush’s head (which seems slow because of Red Rush’s perception of time being RIDICULOUS compared to our own, that horrific scene only lasted like a second for the rest of the characters). He goes for quick, clean kills, minimizing pain. Maybe its just brutal, soldier-like efficiency, since the greatest superheroes on Earth cannot be allowed to get any good hits in (they nearly killed him as it was), but what if it was a desire to not prolong the suffering of people he genuinely liked? 

We see in the flashback towards the end (during the THINK, MARK, THINK! scene lmao) that he initially didn’t give two shits about humanity on a deep level. He loved and respected Debbie and his then-very-young son, but thought humans were, on a whole, primitive and dumb. But as he spends time observing them, watching their culture, interacting with them, living with them, he warms up to them. The smile on his face when Mark hits his first homerun in little league, remembering Debbie’s favourite foods, the way he laughs when he mentions how a superhero had to meet the president in a plaid supersuit, the fishing photograph with the tailor. Even after he finally reveals himself as an infiltrator, the way he talks, to me, shows respect for his adversaries even as he demeans and belittles humanity. The discussion with Cecil, the warning to ‘stay out of this’. Nolan seems reluctant to kill anybody he doesn’t have to, and seemingly acknowledges that the Global Defense Agency at the very least is a minor threat.

So, you say, why does he act so AWFUL at times?

Well, his seeming lack of emotion after the funerals for the Guardians of the Globe can proooooooooooooobably be chalked up to his alien psychology. He finished grieving, he didn’t see the harm in cracking jokes about them. Calling Debora a ‘pet’? I think that honestly would be him trying to rationalise his feelings for her. There’s a fraction of a second where he hesitates to say it, and I honestly think he’s just trying to explain to himself how he could ever love a ‘lesser lifeform’. Killing all those innocent people? In his mind that was justified to get through to Mark. He doesn’t enjoy it -- though he also doesn’t dislike it -- he just sees it as a flat necessity, no less insignificant than killing a bug (i said the man is a complex character, I didn’t say he wasn’t evil). 

Don’t forget, Nolan’s genuine reasoning for bringing Earth into the Viltrum Empire is to help it. He argues that Viltrum technology can end hunger and poverty, end crime, revolutionize medicine. In his eyes, his indoctrinated eyes, he’s doing the right thing to help the people of Earth.

He still thinks he’s the hero.

‘it’s right to pity them’.

He sees humans as lesser creatures, he thinks they need protection from themselves, need to be brought up by the Viltrumites to be better. They can’t survive on their own, they’re weak and soft, they need us to reach their full potential, to find true glory in serving the might of Viltrum. Omni-Man does not see his actions as evil, he thinks he’s the good guy. He reluctantly kills the Guardians of the Globe, slaughters thousands of people, and destroys a city in order to, in his extremely twisted sense of morality, help people.

And, in the end, it is not the Viltrumite parts of Omni-Man and Invincible that end the conflict. It is Mark’s very human belief that he will, one day, get through to his dad. His refusal to give in, his undying love and determination to save people, save Nolan. It’s this that reaches Omni-Man. It doesn’t reach the tough soldier he had been for thousands of years, it reaches the small part of Omni-Man that wasn’t pretending to be human. The part that is Nolan Grayson. The part that, despite still seeing them as primitive and inferior, likes humanity. It’s a human tear that leaves his eye as Nolan flies away from Earth, finally giving up and refusing to facilitate the invasion if it means killing his son, something a full Viltrumite wouldn’t hesitate to do for a second if their family got in the way of their conquest. He was changed by his time with humans.

I’m not defending Omni-Man, he’s obviously a bad guy, an antagonist, serving a genuinely evil empire, but i AM saying he isn’t some flat, boring two dimensional villain who just PRETENDED to like humanity for the twenty odd years he spent living there. I’ve seen people in youtube comments replying with “I think you misunderstand Omni-Man as a character, you see, he was simply pretending to not hate humanity, it was all an elaborate ruse, there’s no real depth and inner terminal in him at all uwu” but i think THEY misunderstand Omni-Man.

He’s not morally grey, he’s arguably not even redeemable, but he IS a complex and well written character and boiling him down to ONLY being an evil alien who tricked people into liking him just rubs me the wrong way.

but idk maybe I misunderstood him and he really IS flat and boring. Maybe his time with humanity didn’t change him at all, he isn’t emotionally conflicted, and he’s just less cool than I thought.

And despite my seeming passive aggressive language, it’s totally chill if you disagree with my personal interpretation of Omni-Man as a character, art is meant to be a unique experience for everyone, so if you see him completely differently to me that’s great! I just dislike the insistence from some people online that anybody who sees him as a deeper, more complicated character is just wrong.

also sorry for this post coming out of left field entirely lmao 

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Hiiii!!! 💫💕🌸🥳

Can I bother with a question... I was (re)watching that zhang qiling edit (not today) - 'cause it's so cool, btw- and I wondered if Reboot Xiaoge’s your favourite one...? And if you're up to answering, what do you think about the other adaptations? Especially (our small bean) xiao yuliang's interpretation of xiaoge?

🤗🌺💐🐰💕

Hey, my precious patootie hehe ILY it always makes me very happy knowing that you rewatch my vids <3

lol dang it, I was kinda hoping to avoid this question, just because I feel like I'd find it hella hard to explain some things, but I'll try my best and hopefully it'll make some sense xD

I'll start from afar bc I wanna try to explain my reasonings, since I don't want to go without arguments into such highly debated question lolz. I talked about this a bit in my previous asks somewhere, but not broadly as to why that one guy hit all the right spots.

So throughout the books Wu Xie always does this wonderful thing, where he very tangibly describes the feeling he gets when Xiaoge is near, I mean like the aura around him. And he always somehow does it so colorful, that this mix of safety, assurance, calmness, composure and some things I can't quite put into one noun, that he brings to him, I think everyone who've read the books can recognize as this almost magical "Xiaoge feeling". It's not just the way he acts in some dangerous situations or smth like that. It's just everything. You either have it or you don't. And here goes my first argument... to me none of them, except for Huang Junjie and Yuliang have it.

I mean it's not even the obvious stuff, it's like the way they move during the action scenes, the way they even stand and hold themselves, the way they touch Wu Xie, the tone of their voices (both of which are like soothing as fuck), little things you'd think wouldn't matter, but when you watch it and all the puzzle pieces are together, you're like... fuck yeah, thats him.

Also not really that weighty of a point, but to me there's always a joy to see that the actor who plays the character not only gets what's he's playing, but also loves it, bc it's always seen on screen. Usually when some asked about the character they play and what they have in common for example they answer with obvious things like if some character is introverted they're like "well I also don't talk very much" or smth like that, you know what I mean. When I was watching interviews of Yuliang and Huang Junjie I was just smiling so much, bc they've said such things that made me go "yeah, Qiling is safe in their hands".

In Reboot case working in such close proximity with the author definitely also played a huge role here. Bc it kinda gets complicated in some aspects since the books are written from Wu Xie's point of view and you can't only base your picture on his perspective, just bc it's coming from a person who after being basically told "you're my whole world" goes "I'm just a person he randomly passes by in his long life" in his thoughts. Not only he's utterly clueless and dumb when it comes to all this, that he wouldn't notice the way Qiling looks at him and other things, its also not that kind of book, that would go "I suddenly caught poker face looking at me like I'm his whole existence" (and I honestly don't want it to be that book lmao). So you have to take into the account here stuff like what author says to get the whole picture, bc if you look at that from the point of Qiling's view for example, this shit takes a whole wild turn. So I really loved that in UN and Reboot ways of showing Qiling's feelings were well thought out and fit the timeline.

Bc it also works both ways, when it comes to other adaptations. Like Qiling is very and I mean ETREMELY hard to win over. We all know that it was a very long process of gaining his trust and even longer for him to fall for Wu Xie to the point of him being his everything. So what I want in those interpretations is for them to get at which point of their relationships what Xiaoge's behavior makes sense. I do not need any fanservice if it ruins the character, I'll just hate it. The thing that their feelings didn't come out of nowhere is what I LOVE about this ship, bc I'm not the kind of person who believes in "we love for nothing" thing and love at first sight thing (only "got hots for each other" at first sight), bc thats bull. Wu Xie became his everything after a long LONG process of getting to know each other. At the beginning tho he was the same stranger to him as everyone else. So what Reboot Qiling feels for Wu Xie is not what UN's Qiling feels for Wu Xie yet and what UN's Qiling feels for Wu Xie is not what Lost Tomb's Qiling feels for Wu Xie (which at that point was nothing). And I feel like not everyone gets the fact that you can totally wreck the character if you make him behave not the way he behaved in that particular time. Like for example, if someone would make a MDZS adaptation where at the very beginning of their relationships LZ treats WWX the way he treated him after the reincarnation just because "who cares, it's still LZ", that would be dumb af, see what I mean. So Xiaoge having a weakness for Wu Xie in part one is automatically not a Xiaoge to me, bc a huge part of his character and the thing NPSS speaks a lot about is just how IMPOSSIBLE it is for someone to catch his attention and how long it took Wu Xie to get there. So let's just say to me UN and Reboot Qilings for the first time didn't feel like some mashup or character summary/parody, they were Qilings the way they are supposed to be in that part of the story, bc it was the only times someone actually bothered to coordinate it.

Now as to why I prefer one to another. Xiaoge has this thing... the way he holds himself with other people, that is sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally suppressing.

Like everyone knows that if you're a passerby, Qiling genuinely doesn't fucking care and would in fact be pretty harsh about it in terms of treating people like they do not deserve their attention. He won't be like "please, don't bother me", he simply ignored them like an empty space. He is also like that with acquaintances who in his opinion do not deserve his respect like that girl who went hysterical, bc she was upset that he was the only one who wasn't drooling on her like all other men on the crew, Chen Wenjin, Wu Xie's uncles and etc. He's not openly disrespectful unless they trigger him in some way (usually by trying to act superior or later on for not treating Wu Xie right), but if they do, he will in fact remind them their place in sometimes a very rude way, at times humiliating them in front of ppl bc he looks younger than them and talking starts.

He's always doing things on his own terms and hates being told what to do. Like he legit scared Chen Wenjin just with a look and the tone of his voice when he said "let go", when she tried to command him on the mission and grabbed him trying to lecture him about what he should or shouldn't do. That's why Wu Erbai didn't even try anything like this and let him do whatever he needed to do and equally lead the mission in Reboot. And why the scene where Wu Xie 'commands' "Xiaoge, come back" and he immediately listens holds another special place in my heart. Bc he NEVER and I mean NEVER allows such things to ANYONE.

So here I came to a point of why despite loving them both dearly, my favorite Xiaoge is Huang Junjie.

I have this dissonance with Yuliang's version when to me in many scenes it felt like he and Wu Xie are the same age. Like if he was Xiaoge, but in his 20s. In his interactions with Chen Wenjin the dynamics was turned upside down, with him being okay with her telling him what to do and just in general the way she behaved with him. Same as like I didn't always quite believe him to be on par with older generation or even Pangzi, it just felt like he was truly younger than them. Some scenes that I do find extremely cute just don't fit book Xiaoge at all, I'm talking about some moments like his face when Wu Xie gave him food, or him pouting and many things he's done, when you were going "uwu he's a baby". He just never gives me this feeling in the books ever, not just bc he's 100 years old, but sad fact here.. bc he's simply unable to behave that way. Like in the books you'll desperately want to shower him with love, but he's just... I can't quite explain, it's very sad.

I guess it's just you know these characters, who are like hundreds years old, but look like they're 18? I think you have to be very careful with how you write those, so you could deliver that. And in UN because of some changed dynamics and scenes I straight up forgot about it, until Wu Xie threw some joke like "he's an old man" in front of a restaurant.

In Reboot Xiaoge could make Wu Erbai stutter with one move, put Yuliang's version in the same scene, I just don't think it would've worked. Like I'm trying to imagine him telling UN's Wu Erbai what to do and having troubles already haha. Same as I don't think he's capable to be genuinely mad at Wu Xie, and HJJ nailed it esp in one of my fav when Wu Xie was laughing at Pangzi's joke about him catching cold. The look he gave him and how ZYL just retreated was priceless xD. And boy could Qiling get angry with him in the books!

Otherwise I didn't have any drastic fall outs there, like with Joseph's Wu Xie and Ah Ning's death, because that was just too much of a difference, but there were still moments where it was once again this the same scene completely different emotion thing. He was more tolerable to ppl in general here, more pliable. And 50% of the time he gave me the cute lost kitten type, which I just cannot connect with the feeling he gave me in the books. His personality is a cat type 100%, but like seriously "cute baby" is the last word combination I would ever apply to book Xiaoge, but with Yuliang's version it's easily applied. So small bean he is indeed. With Joseph and in UN it works incredibly perfect to me, but the way he is in UN is at times too gentle. And there are lots of scenes where Joseph himself looked at him in a way "you're too cute, let me pinch your cheeks" kind of way, or the way he like sat down next to him on the coast, he was a bit babying him at times. I can't imagine book pingxie doing that. It's just a whole different vibe, the way he takes care of him, the way he lets him take care of him... it's...uuuuuuuuu another vibe (see, I'm so good at explaining lmao).

It's also kinda funny to me, bc HJJ who's the smallest and who irl truly a kitten never once gave me that feeling on screen for some reason. The one babied and loved by every crew and old ppl, who was cutely hiding behind ZYL's back on set, who won't sue an ex who almost ruined his career bc of how stupid she is, bc he "didn't want to hurt her", who according to staff can't even step on a fly, whom CMH was petting for several minutes after he had to hit him with a prop brick bc he didn't wanna do it lmao. I was just like.. ok, this is hilarious, bc I in fact didn't expect him to be a small bean, so watching all the bts made me go LOOOOL. Probably ZYL acting like a 3 year old helped him transform and the age difference problem got lost lmao

As for other adaptations. You know I can't watch seriously "Lost Tomb", I think some ppl probably have some nostalgic feeling about it, but I'm sorry, to me it's fucking hilarious. Like I've already said it looks like some type of twilight parody thing or smth. Soft damselle Wu Xie esp killed me, bc 1st when he ever was that, 2nd in the first book he's salty af, I don't even know this dude in this interpretation, I was like who's this. YangYang I know him from other things, I really don't think it's his role. I know the script and everything is bad. I know the costume and hair are horrendously funny, but it's just I was watching him in those action scenes and was like no... just I'm sorry but I'm not feeling it. I simply just don't know what to say about the whole thing seriously, bc I don't even know where to start. 10 episodes of some salad finished with one mutilated scene from book 6 for no reason the fact that characters are weird themselves also I can't quite tell, did they really just meet or they imply smth else lmao.. I'm sorry, but I do not get it.

I've given LT2 another try after finishing all the books and I've dropped it half way through, Cheng Yi wasn't even close to how I pictured Xiaoge in any aspect. He in fact didn't do anything OOC or off the book or anything, I just was like "not my Qiling". Happens sometimes.

Explore with the note you already know how I feel about this lol let's just forget.

P.S. To be fair here also maybe we should take into account the fact that some got luckier than other with "at which point" Xiaoge they're playing. Like for example, "Wrath of the Sea" and "Qingling Tree" books which is LT2 is not exactly you can say much about Qiling there, he trolls them there in the beginning (in a brilliant way that was totally lost in the adaptation) and he is there in "Wrath of Sea", but it's not the part that can make his character shine in any way, there's not much things happening there that would make you fall for him or get to know him; Yuliang grabbed the fattest piece bc it's middle several books, when they're always together and his character shines the most in terms of clues about past, opening up to Wu Xie and Pangzi, and there are many many events where you can get the picture of what kind of man he is; Huang Junjie grabbed my fav piece of utter devotion, where he's already fully and wholeheartedly belongs to Wu Xie, that I'm just weak for. So like... there's also that I guess xD.

[levis-little-nuggie]

What the Ever-loving FUCK Happened in Chapter 16??!?!!

A synopsis/transcript of the events that transpired between the end of Lesson 15 and 16.

15-17: Time Loop 1

Barb shows us to his room and goes over the mission, telling us how to return back to the “present” after finding out about the door

15-20: no title

Open to Mammon’s room, all the brothers are in there bc they’re trying to get Lucifer and MC together, like a horror/scary thing to set the mood; the purpose to get Lucifer and MC alone together to open up; MC’s portal opens up and plops them in Mammon’s room with all the brothers; Lucifer and MC are in Levi’s room to play the game. We leave Mammon's room and immediately have to hide

16-1: Time Loop 2

Lucifer and MC are coming out of Levi's room and we're forced to hide in Lilith’s hidden room.

16-6: Time Loop 3

MC finds themselves standing face-to-face with Belphie, the attic door is open, and he starts hugging MC.

16-10: no title

Belphie kills us, then we’re speaking to a voice (Lilith's soul had been trapped, “I knew I picked the right person, I’ve been waiting for so long, you see. I’ve been waiting for you to come find me...after my death I remembered who I was, ever since becoming a soul, I’ve been watching over them, and in that time, I’ve forgotten how to get to the Celestial Realm.”) 

16-12: The Reunion

Brothers are standing over MC’s corpse and Belphie is out of the attic. There's a flashback of Barb telling us to find out how/who opened the attic door and not to be seen by anyone; however the brothers see us and the body Mammon is holding disappears; MC talks about Lilith having lived happily as a human.

16-15: no title

“I tell everyone the story as I heard it from Lucifer;” Diavolo comes in and informs MC they’re Lilith’s descendent. All the brothers start hugging MC and Diavolo asks: “Do you want to hug MC too, Belphegor?”

16-17: The Truth Revealed

Belphie tells us it’s his fault he couldn’t protect Lilith but Lucifer says it was his fault. The screen goes black and we're left with the assumption Lucifer lays out everything we already know based on what he revealed earlier in lesson 11 and in MC's flashbacks of Lucifer swearing loyalty to Diavolo.

16-19: no title

Barb is making and serving tea to the brothers, everyone’s in a good mood.

Lesson 17 starts with everyone acting awkward now with Belphie out of the attic and MC is now tasked with mending his relationships with all the brothers.

But wait, aren't we missing something?

You're right. We are.

16-A: Stuck Waiting

Levi: *sigh*

Asmo: Ugh, Levi, how many times have you sighed now?

Levi: I dunno, maybe 10 or so?

Satan: No it’s been 30 times at least

Asmo: Yes but what about you, Satan? How many cups of tea have you had, hmm? You know, if that stomach of yours gets all bloated from tea, i’m going to find you much less appealing

Satan: I couldn’t care less whether you find me appealing or not, Asmo. Also, instead of criticizing me, how about you say something to mammon here

Mammon: *mumble* … man this sucks so much … *grumble*

Asmo: Mammon, do you think maybe you could stop pacing around the room grumbling to yourself?

Levi: yeah, it’s super annoying

Mammon: Shaddup! How can I sit still at a time like this, huh? I mean MC went to the PAST!... Alone! Lke, MC may seem like someone who’s really got it together and stuff, but there’s a real boneheaded streak there that pops up at the weirdest times! Boneheaded, weak, and super reckless. Oh, and too damn gutsy! You never know when Marcie’s gonna take some sorta crazy risk! And like, that makes me wanna be there just in case. Like I GOTTA be there, or who knows what’ll happen?

Levi: Mmhm, sure, MC is SOOO special to you… What, are we supposed to be impressed or something?

Asmo: ooh I know exactly what you mean! It’s like you can’t help but what to lie down together on a bed or a sofa and do all sorts of naughty things- 

Satan: You’d better not do that Asmo

Asmo: excuse me? Could that be jealousy I hear, Satan? Relax. I won’t deny that MC is cute, but still, I think you’re pretty cute too Satan, so no need to worry

Levi: Yeah, MC really IS totally cute, don’t you think? And sort of … hard not to like… *grumbles*

Asmo: wait a minute… Levi, am I hearing what I think i’m hearing

Satan: You’ve only ever been interested in yout anime characters. Levi, has something changed?

Mammon: Whoa, is it just me or does that totally sound like a sign that Armageddon’s about to hit?

Levi: hey come on! Stop looking at me like that! Um...um...Asmo! You should go to the past and check to see how things are going!

Asmo: excuse me/ I know you’re just trying to change the subject, but don’t be ridiculous! I mean, you know that’s impossible. The doors into the past are inside Barbatos’s room, you realize?

Levi: Sure, but can’t you use your powers to charm Barbatos or something?

Asmo: ugh… no thank you! I mean, we’re really talking about Barbatos. If my powers did work on him, who knows what he might do to me once he ends up charmed? He might kill me, and i’m too young for that.

Mammon: pff, what’re ya, chicken?

Asmo: okay them why don’t you go seduce him, Mammon?

Mammon: Me? Um...really? … … Oh no no no no! No way that’s happening!

Asmo: but you really considered it for a second there, didn’t you? You considered seducing Barbatos!

Mammon: N-no, I didn’t! I mean, if it were MC, that’d be another story…!

Levi: You don’t need to remind us that you’ve got it bad for MC, Mammon. Keep it to yourself.

Satan: Well, powers of seduction don’t work on MVC to begin with, so you couldn’t do it even if you wanted to. Come to think of it...why are we all so hung up on MC anyways? It’s hard to believe that a simple human could have this kind of effect on us.

Asmo: hmm…I guess MC is just special, you know?

Mammon: ...yeah right. Special, that’s it!

Asmo: Still, let’s be honest. When it comes down to it, out of all of us, I’m the only one Marcie has eyes for!

Mammon: ...huh? What’re you talkin’ about?

Asmo: well it’s only natural, right? I mean, show me a human who doesn’t find me absolutely irresistible

Levi: ...well i’ll have you know that MC said that i was a true friend

Mammon: You’re all dumb as stumps! Have you all forgotten? I was MC’s first, after all, so clearly I’M the one deservin’ of all the love!

Satan: *blushing profusely*...

Asmo; mammon, don’t be intentionally misleading! You ‘ve got satan here thinking that you actually WERE MC’s first. Satan, what Mammon really means is that he was the first one to make a pact, okay?

Satan:...pff, like i care

Levi: if you don’t care, then why do you look so relieved? We can all see it on your face, Satan

Mammon: oh MC…! MC! Come back to us dammit! And soon!

Levi: Wait a minute! Where’d Beel go?

Asmo: Beel? Um, he was right there a second ago. 

Satan: Maybe he went to find Belphie?

16-C: no title

Beel: ...Belphie? Are you in there?

Lucifer: Shh, quiet

Beel: …! Lucifer!

Lucifer: he seems to be asleep

Beel: …

Lucifer: Beel, there’s something I need to talk to you about

Beel: What?

Lucifer: When belphie disappeared, you were the one who it hurt the most

Beel:…

Lucifer: I shouldnt’ have lied and told you he was up in the human world. It was wrong of me. Also, i knew how hard it was for you, but i couldn’t bring myself to talk to you about it… i’m sorry

Beel: Forget it. It’s fine. Belphie’s back now, so it’s fine.

Lucifer: Beel…

B: but to make up for it, Lucifer… from now on, i want you to trust the rest of us more. Look to us for help and support when you need it. Not just me. I mean all of us - including Belphie

Lucifer: But what if that still isn’t enough, even with all of us working together? What then?

Beel: that’s easy. At times like that...you can call on MC to help, of course. Isn’t that right?

L: Yeah. That’s right. 

Beel: I sure hope MC comes back soon. 

Lucifer: Yeah. And by the time that happens, Belphie will probably have woken up, too.

That's right. There exists a dimension where they don't get their MC back. The MC from that dimension has replaced the MC that Belphie killed.

Diavolo and Barb sent MC back in time to figure out who or how the attic door opened. MC had been acting under the notion that they needed the power equivalent of having pacts with all 7 brothers to open the door yet, even in the time loop it's still not clear. One moment we're hiding in Lilith's secret room and the next, we're standing in front of Belphie and the door is open.

[kyramidoriya]

My Perspective on BakuDeku as an Adult

I’ve been seeing lots of BakuDeku hate lately, and I have found a lot of things in common with a lot of it. So I decided to try to think positively and post this in hopes that the BakuDeku Anti’s might understand BakuDeku shippers a little better. Important note: Although I do ship BakuDeku, I am first and foremost a multishipper, and my OTP is TodoDeku. First, Katsuki is a child. I know a lot of people who are teenagers will tell me otherwise, but you are a child. You have years to grow and change. I would never deny that to anyone that they could become a better person. Was he a bully? Of course he was. Did he do terrible things to Zuzu that should not be excused? Of course he did. But that doesn’t mean he’s not capable of change? Of course it’s not. Izuku deserves an apology AT THE LEAST. But I’m not going to sit here and hate on a child either.  Next, I think as an adult it’s much easier for me to see the growth a teenager is capable of. I know that many people just don’t want to forgive him flat out. Maybe you’ve been bullied, and you hate your bully. Maybe your bully will never change and will never deserve forgiveness, but don’t force those expectations on others. There is tons of evidence in the anime/manga that Zuzu is steadily growing more confident in their relationship and it’s ability to heal. It’s not up to you whether Zuzu wants to acknowledge that. Zuzu also clearly does not consider Katsuki to be his abuser. He freely returns to Katsuki’s side and is dead set on repairing their relationship. That is not the typical behavior of someone who has been abused. If you actually take a moment to speak with a BakuDeku shipper, I can guarantee you that none of them support bullying and abuse. But most of them, like the redemption arcs. Or they like the stories where the boys have already grown into adulthood. Because people can change. Maybe not all will, but all are capable of it. And it’s clear to me that Katsuki is changing. Because it’s easy to see the potential in a person or a relationship as an adult who has been in and seen complicated relationships. Don’t let your thinking be stuck in the present. It’s important to acknowledge change and potential. Now, do I think if they started dating the way they are right now in canon would be healthy? Of course not, BOTH boys need some therapy (honestly, everyone in the show needs therapy). But do I think it’s ok to invalidate a relationship because of the lives they lead as children? Absolutely not. And it’s definitely not ok to tell BakuDeku shippers that they’re romanticizing abuse, or that they support bullying. That shit is dangerous and harmful.  Laslty, I think it’s important to acknowledge the society they live in, the behaviors it breeds, and hero societies reactions to trauma.  The first time we see Kats push Zuzu away, is when Kats falls off the log. Your first reaction is logically, “that’s dumb, Zuzu just wanted to make sure he’s alright.” But think of it this way. Imagine you’re a four year old child who has grown up in a society that has told you that if you’re weak, you’re useless. Imagine growing up being told that if you’re not strong enough to endure, than why bother being around. Imagine that’s something even your parents told you. Then imagine that someone who was important to you, implied you were weak. Of course we know logically that Izuku would never ever mean it that way. But Katsuki wasn’t logical. He was four fucking years old and his best friend did something that could practically be seen as betrayal. Then imagine he keeps doing it. Everyone is telling you that you’re strong and valuable, and there’s still that one kid who used to be your best friend, who is now trying to imply you’re something that this society sees as nothing. Obviously, that’s going to awful.  Now, imagine you’re 14 and this kid does it again. And not only that but you’ve almost been MURDERED by a villain. And what do the people around you say? That you’ll be a great hero. They don’t get you checked out by a medic. They don’t make sure you’re ok. They don’t help with your trauma. They only praise your strength.  Then imagine you’re 16, and you’ve been fucking kidnapped. For several days. By villains who have every intention of murdering people. Then imagine when you’re rescued the heroes say the same shit they did last time. Imagine all that trauma being ignored by the adults around you. Then imagine going home, to a parent who blames you for it.  If you can read all that, and tell me you don’t understand Katsuki a little more, then maybe you need to work on being more empathetic. You don’t need to like him. But if you’re going to make valid arguments for or against a character or ship, then I beg that you educate yourself. TLDR; Katsuki has been through a lot in a society that treats most everyone like shit unless they’re strong, and even then they’re held to ridiculous standards and their trauma is ignored. Did Katsuki bully him? Yes. Did Katsuki do shitty things? Absolutely he did. But he is capable of growth, and so is Zuzu. They’ll grow and mature and become totally different people. Think before you call shippers horrible names like abuse sympathizers or bully lovers. The people who ship BakuDeku ship it because they believe that people can redeem themselves. They ship BakuDeku because they recognize these are fucking kids who have so much potential as individuals, as friends and/or as romantic partners.  Think before you call anyone names. Trying to understand people can go a long way in making everyone’s lives better. Don’t be part of the problem, be part of the solution.  Also, it’s like midnight and I’m barely coherent. I am happy to talk about literally any of this with anyone, as long as they’re open to having a friendly conversation on the subject. I am a tolerant individual but I won’t put up with people being dicks. Even you kiddos out in TumblrLand. 

[dirtydancingdean]

something about how dean so completely parallels buffy summers from btvs like they are two iterations of the same character. i mean, buffy the vampire slayer is an undeniably a big influence on supernatural, even if the show itself wouldn’t exactly advertise that fact. you have sam’s sacrifice in swan song paralleling buffy’s sacrifice in the gift, the borrowing of a lot of demons and (god help me) lore, the weird amount of buffy actors in the show (sometimes playing vampires, which is hysterical), the campiness and horror. hell, even cas’s moment of pure happiness seems like a nod to angel’s moment of pure happiness. (dean and cas did it better though). but the biggest similarity is the way dean parallels buffy. he’s obviously not meant to. he’s supposed to be a gun-slinging, wise-cracking ladies man, but that’s not what he becomes. honestly that’s not even what he comes across as in the beginning. buffy and dean are both meant to be heroes, but buffy is the main character of her show, while that’s supposed to be sam in dean’s. and buffy and sam do share their similarities, particularly in their desire for normality which backfires on them because of their equally weighed desire to help people. but dean is so much more like buffy in so many ways?? like buffy, dean always feels everything is his responsibility (like he says in 7.05, “There’s always something eating at me. That’s who I am. something happens, I feel responsible, all right?”). this is largely in part thanks to j*hn winchester, while buffy’s sense of responsibility comes from the fact that a whole group of old white men have told her she’s the one girl in all the world who can fight evil. both of them kind of know on some level that this is kind of fucked up and even try attempting to fight back against their imposed duties occasionally. dean says it in 2.20: “Your happiness for all those people's lives, no contest. Right? But why? Why is it my job to save these people? Why do I have to be some kind of hero?” which is buffy to a t! that's what buffy is all about! the loneliness and unfairness of having this burden on your shoulders! buffy says this in prophecy girl: “I don't care! I don't care. Giles, I'm sixteen years old. I don't wanna die.” but they both always, always go back to do their job. they both always sacrifice their own happiness for others. none of the writers would have intended to have dean make a speech that is entirely parallel to buffy summers’s prophecy girl speech, right down to both sarah michelle gellar and jackles’s tears. because ha ha, buffy is a girl hero, while dean is the embodiment of every male fantasy about what an action hero is.

the thing is, though, when you make dean every male fantasy in the world - attractive, good with women, tough, strong, likes rock music, hates chick flick moments, knows how to shoot a gun, looks good doing it, etc - you make him every male fantasy about women too. which is how we get those slow, full-body shots of dean that you normally only get with women, how we get dean being a caretaker, dean being a pacifier between sam and john, dean watching dirty dancing and liking taylor swift, dean always being the bait, dean’s interactions with villains being framed sexually, dean getting called pretty twice a season. we joke about dean being a hot action girl but he is often objectified in the particular way only women in media are. the way buffy is - in the show i think they actually did a pretty good job of not objectifying buffy. but there are times where they do, and it’s uncomfortable, and it’s subtle, the way it is on spn. and buffy and dean are both used to this kind of treatment; they often weaponize their sexuality, using it when they feel threatened. in the first episode of s2, buffy’s just suffered the enormous trauma of being resurrected after having been bitten by a vampire whose violence has sexual undertones. when she comes back to her friends, they talk about how closed off and mean she’s being, culminating in the scene where she goes to the bronze. if you haven't seen that scene then i dont know how to explain the way she absolutely uses her sexuality against xander and angel, just like dean uses his as a front to protect himself against everyone. when buffy’s traumatized she pushes herself away from those closest to her, represses her emotions, and uses fighting demons as a distraction. sound familiar? buffy and dean both make witty pop culture references that monsters don’t understand and self-deprecating jokes about themselves to deal with when they feel threatened and their low opinions of themselves. buffy has a lot of lines that sound just like dean’s! @lazarusr1sing mentioned buffy saying, “I may be dead, but I’m still pretty, which is more than I can say for you,” as a line that dean literally could have said and it’s true! they’re both a fan of quirky banter during fights but they’re both so messed up when it comes to their opinions of themselves. buffy in 7x07: “I have all this power. I didn't ask for it. I don't deserve it. It's like... I wanted to be punished. I wanted to hurt like I thought I deserved. [...] I feel like I'm worse than anyone. Honestly, I'm beneath them. My friends, my boyfriends. I feel like I'm not worthy of their love. 'Cause even though they love me, it doesn't mean anything cause their opinions don't matter. They don't know. They haven't been through what I've been through. [...] Sometimes I feel...this is awful. I feel like I'm better than them. Superior.” yeah, that’s...dean.

and they absolutely dive into self guilt and hatred if something goes wrong, even if it’s not necessarily their fault. faith in 3x15 says to buffy, “In the balance, nobody's gonna cry over some random bystander who got caught in the crossfire,” and buffy says, “I am.” the amount of trauma buffy and dean both go through kind of desensitizes them to this idea - dean especially, i think, though that’s mainly the fault of the sheer amount of writers and episodes supernatural has - but if they get someone killed, they will do absolutely anything to make up for it.

the idea of sympathetic monsters in buffy and supernatural is met with scorn a lot of the time by buffy and dean. for buffy this is a matter of mental self-preservation. her job is to kill demons, and if she lets herself think all demons can be good, then that means she might have been killing sentient beings that could have done good or weren’t doing harm, since she was a teenager. she can’t let herself think that way so she closes herself off to the possibility of demons being good a lot of the time. we talk about how supernatural majorly drops the ball when it comes to empathizing with the monsters (where’s that post, you know, the, “saving people, hunting things, white men with guns decide which is which,” post), but when it comes to dean, part of that is because, like buffy, he doesn’t want to face the idea that he’s been killing things that aren’t evil since he was a child. he’ll make exceptions (cas, crowley, benny, rowena), like buffy makes exceptions (angel, spike, clem, oz, anya), but it’s easier if it’s all black and white. they’re both strangely attracted to monsters too, though, because part of them feels like they are monsters themselves. like @s4castiel said they have romantic or romantically implied relationships with things they’re meant to fight - dean with benny, cas, and crowley + buffy with angel, spike, and faith. and monsters change themselves for buffy and dean’s sakes – cas, benny, crowley, angel, spike, all become better for the sake of buffy and dean! like that leviathan in 7.06 who says dean doesn’t have relationships he has applications for sainthood!

they hate the idea of being seen as just a killer (dean in 3.10, “Daddy knew what you were. Good soldier and nothing else,” and buffy in 5.22, “Guess that means a Slayer really is just a killer after all.”) dean says, “[A killer] is not who I am,” to chuck in 15.19, just like buffy says, “A slayer is not a killer,” through the later seasons. spike’s speech in 5.07 i think, really says it: “Death is on your heels, baby, and sooner or later, it's gonna catch you. And part of you wants it, not only to stop the fear and uncertainty, but because you're just a little bit in love with it. Death is your art. You make it with your hands day after day, that final gasp, that look of peace.” their worst fear is that all they can do is hurt other people. they’ve been brought up to think violence is all they can do. but they both are first and foremost protectors, especially when it comes to sam and dawn, whose roles in both shows respectively is to be a reminder of dean and buffy’s humanity.

dawn, who first shows up in season 5 as buffy’s younger sister, is, represents buffy’s most beloved parts of herself, buffy’s humanity. sam is a lot like her in the respect that their destiny was to end the world; they’re both book-smart too, while buffy and dean act a lot like dumb blondes despite being incredibly intelligent in ways that aren’t clear to everyone. (not to go on a tangent but they’re both really good battle tacticians who make a lot of references to literature and tv shows and can perceive people and monsters’ weaknesses, etc.) dawn is dangerous to the world like sam is dangerous to the world in s2-s5, but buffy will not kill her like dean will not kill sam. you know how in the end 2009 dean realizes just how much 2014 dean has changed when he talks about killing sam as lucifer? sam is dean’s humanity like dawn is buffy’s humanity. they both put their siblings over everything else in the world. they sacrifice things that sam and dawn can’t begin to understand because dean and buffy shield them from it - dean in 2.22: “I had to take care of you. It’s my job,” and buffy in 6.14: “Dawn, the most important job that I have is looking out for you.” in s5 of buffy, if dawn lives, the world ends, and buffy doesn’t care because she can’t kill dawn. in 5.22 she says, “I don't understand. I don't know how to live in this world if these are the choices. If everything just gets stripped away. I don't see the point. I just wish that...I just wish my mom was here. [..] If Dawn dies, I’m done with it. I’m quitting,” paralleling dean quitting hunting after sam dies. they’re both insanely protective over dawn and sam - dean in 2.09: “You make a move on [Sam], you'll be dead before you hit the ground,” and buffy in 5.22: “I’ll kill anyone who comes near Dawn.” when sam dies in 2.22, dean doesn’t hesitate to offer up his soul in exchange for sam’s life; when dawn is about to die to save the world in 5.22, buffy doesn’t hesitate to die to save the world in dawn’s place. this all on top of the fact that sam and dawn are the babies, the ones dean and buffy have to take care of, which means that...no one is taking care of dean and buffy. like, dean in 3.10: “Sam, [John] doted on. Sam he loved,” and buffy’s mom in 5.05 hugging dawn and calling her “little punkin belly” and in response to buffy’s question of, “Did you ever have any names for me?” says, “No, I think you were always just Buffy.” when buffy’s mom gets sick in s5, buffy has to shoulder an incredible amount of responsibility - giving her mom her medicine, taking care of her, taking care of dawn, fighting a hellgod - and can’t break down in front of anyone because she has to be strong for dawn and her mom, the way dean has to be strong for sam and john (john in 2.01: “You took care of Sammy, you took care of me. You did that, and you didn't complain, not once.) they’re both so scared of opening up and being a burden - buffy’s nightmare hallucination of her deadbeat dad in 1.10 says the same kind of stuff about her being a burden and unwanted that zachariah’s projection of mary says in 5.16. it really is about the eldest sister complex in the end!!!

but they didn’t ever really mean to have dean be like buffy! buffy was literally meant to subvert traditional male action heroes. buffy summers is the male action hero, but she gets to have feelings and traditionally feminine traits too. she likes cheese and wearing pink and dressing up and having pretty hair, but she thinks about battle tactics and kills a vampire like every episode. dean? dean is meant to be the male action hero without the part about having feelings and traditionally feminine traits...except that backfires spectacularly. i mean, they give dean traits such as liking nightgowns to be like haha, wink-wink, nudge-nudge, isn’t that HILARIOUS. except it doesn’t come off that way, we know it doesn’t come off that way. so dean’s watched dead poets society and rent and he sings along to air supply and is good with kids and nerds out over cowboys, but he drives a classic muscle car and kills death and carries a gun with him everywhere he goes. dean and buffy both become multifaceted, complicated, human heroes – but it was intentional for buffy. it was unintentional for dean, so the narrative actively punishes him for it. i mean ymmv on how you feel about the ending of buffy, but she does get a satisfying happy ending. dean, on the other hand, is silenced and killed off and gets the worst possible ending for his character, all because they couldn’t control him.