#and dare i fucking say that the hate the original movies get is so crazy!!
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solar-halos · 9 months ago
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major hater moment alert
it’s like 4am rn and i’m so sleepy bht csnf fall asleep so maybe this won’t make a lot of sense but i’ve finally finished watching the pjo show and i think some of u need to grow the fuck up 😭😭 like i’m sorry but comparing and contrasting the shows to the books soo fucking closely is so crazy to me like i know some of yall are working 9-5 office jobs so there’s no way u should be this pressed about the symbolism in a kids show. it’s nostalgic obviously but at the same time it will never be that serious. i’m guilty of that too tho don’t get me wrong bc i had made such a long rant abt Book Gabe vs Show Gabe before i realized i truly do not give a fuck. like. me resonating more with Book Percy’s relationship with his Book Family has absolutely no fucking effect on Current Me watching the show. who cares. i know i can get lowkey insecure at times about having “childish” interests but i want to make it very clear that im not dunking on ppl who dislike the show. like, i think there were plenty of things to dislike. i just don’t think that they’re worth getting worked up over, especially if you’re an adult person with adult responsibilities, because isn’t enjoying the whimsy of this show more important than writing a whole deep dive of why you hate this show with a passion? which i know is hypocritical coming from me but if im complaining about a show you better believe its bc i love it and am obsessed with it, not because im hate-watching it and actively looking for things to get mad about. i really don’t get it like if the show really bothers you that much just turn it off. like girl..
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olderthannetfic · 11 months ago
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People going to you to say they didn't like a book instead of just posting that in their own blog and blocking the rabid fans is so fucking sad to me. Is this where we're at? Instead of blocking the sea of lost teens and 20-somethings in the dark academia tag who try to use "dark academia" as a substitute for having to develop their own interests and hobbies, we're now going to whisper on anon, "I don't like this one book"? That's how scared of negative interaction people are? It's the dark academia fandom. They're morons. They don't even argue with you that The Secret History is good, they reply with your post quoted and emojis inserted inbetween every sentence and think they're big smarty smart-smarts who showed you, or they say you didn't get it. "The fandom is absolutely insane" by what metric? Speaking as someone who's been sent suicide bait, death threats, rape threats, pictures of dead animals, Holocaust pics and actual CSEM by other fandoms, if you're too afraid of someone replying, "wow lmao ur not smart like us u no get it" or spamming your original post's text with emojis, maybe you're not old enough to be on tumblr or be reading a book aimed at adults.
The fact that people are now so afraid of pushback that they won't even say they dislike something off anon is honestly really pathetic. This is like people on Reddit who say, "I wouldn't say this if I weren't deleting my account later today, but I don't like MCU movies." It's the same vibe and I have the same question: you know you can just block people if they cry about shit you say, right? I got sent a dead rat once by a Yandere Simulator fan and the police + a restraining order is basically blocking but for RL, but most people in the fandom for The Secret History aren't going to actually interact with another person. They don't even usually bother to write fic or make art for it, they just repost quotes from it with some pics they swiped off of Pinterest for it.
Those are the people who you're so afraid of that you can't even say, "I don't like a book" lest they hurt you. You're afraid of Pinterest moodboard makers who ask things like, "what religion is the most dark academia? I want to convert to that" with a straight face who think wearing a white button-down shirt and brown pants makes them the embodiment of wealth and class and quiet luxury.
As someone who's actually had interactions with crazy fans IRL - especially Star Wars fans, as they're almost all frothing at the mouth to rant about how much they hate Star Wars - I am happy to report that this is a survivable thing and not one you need to be so afraid of that you don't dare mention it for fear of backlash.
Speak freely. Block people. Move on. Their tears are embarrassing for them, not you.
--
I spent some time in anon spaces, and it felt like a nice break at the time... but I have to say, I really notice the difference now that I'm findable again. For all the shit that comes my way, a hell of a lot of people have tried to befriend me over the last few years. I wouldn't have met any of them if I hadn't been visible.
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shelfthe-reader · 6 months ago
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Greetings mutual of mine, tis I, completing my duties as a mutual to randomly send you questions :D
I dare you… to rant about a character who deserved better GO
(lets pretend this hasn’t been sitting for two weeks)
So my instinct was to start yapping about my #emotionalsupportwhiteboy Jason Grace but I doubt I can say anything new about him. Or be able to be coherent since all of his lore just flew through the window. Then I thought Will Solace or Nico di Angelo but they are too obvious (since they were literally Rick’s punching bags). But instead I give you Darrel Curtis from The Outsiders and LET ME TELL YOU WHY (SPOILERS FOR THE OUTSIDERS IF ANY OF THE MUTUALS ARE WANTING TO READ THIS INCREDIBLE PHENOMENAL BOOK)
A/N: To make this as fair as possible, I’m ONLY focusing on characterization from the book. Reason being I’ve never seen the movie so I’m not able to average out the three major lores (book, movie, musical.) It’s only fair if I do either the original or all. Not partial lore.
I’m not quite sure if this counts as “deserved better” but it’s still tragic
I first read this book tthan our protagonist Ponyboy Curtis.
At that age, I HATED Darry. I didn’t sympathize with him, I thought he was a terrible person, etc. All of my energy went into crying for Johnny, and deciding that Pony and I were the same person. I didn’t give a shit about Darry’s actions. I thought he deserved what came to him.
But then, in my senior year of highschool (this year, 2024 for those in the future if this post gets resurrected), I picked up the book again, read it three times in four months, annotated it, and watched the musical. As I’m writing this, I’m rereading my annotations from last month.
Now enough with this exposition, let’s get into my rant about Darrel Shaynne Curtis Jr.
***
Darry's gone through a lot in his twenty years, grown up too fast. Sodapop'll never grow up at all. I don't know which way's the best. I'll find out one of these days. (The Outsiders, pg 10)
Darry was one step away from being set for life- he was a Greaser who could get out. He was smart, he had non-Greaser friends; he had a football scholarship and was set for college.
He was either 19 or freshly 20 when BOTH of his parents get killed in an accident leaving two kids under 18. Naturally, being the soul he was, he immediately gave up his dream to keep his hooligan family together. They all knew that if he went to college it would be over for the family. There’s only so much you can do in Poor-ass, bum-fuck Nowhere, Oklahoma. And Darry does it all.
On top of working stupid hours in stupid conditions hauling stupid amounts of roofing, he has to parent a teenager who knows too much for his own good. This book is written in first person, and while Ponyboy defends his every decision, you can tell he doesn’t have the street smarts his brothers grew up with. And you can tell that stresses Darry out even more, even with the amount of times Pony insults/shit talks his brother.
Does Darry deal with this well? Hell no. I’d be surprised if he did. So much stupid in one week can drive a person crazy (believe me, I know.) Now, I don’t condone smacking children for ANY reason, but I think here, Darry was in that brother/father limbo and crossed into brother territory. Like have y’all NOT smacked your siblings? But went royally wrong here is that because he acts so much like a “father-overlord” to Ponyboy so often, Pony couldn’t even compute the fact that Darry could ACTUALLY act like a brother sometimes. In the park with Johnny, he even compares it to Johnny being hit by his father. Apparently being a brother doesn’t describe Darry anymore
The REALLY heartbreaking part is the reunion after ✨The Fire✨. When his “Alpha male, if I don’t feel anything it would be better for all of us” facade shatters and he just KNOWS that he inadvertently causes everything after page 58. That’s another burden that no man should EVER carry.
It took a murder, a fire, a rumble, a death, a suicide, a three-day fever dream, and Soda running away for Ponyboy to finally understand what Darry does to keep him safe and I think that’s the most tragic thing of all.
Am I just talking in circles? Probably. I’m never coherent when talking about my traumatized characters.
As a treat for staying the entire length of this essay/incoherent rant, here are the bones of an Outsiders playlist I’m making.
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rosetyler42 · 3 months ago
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@the-rolls-on-black Alot of people have a thing against 2nd love stories it seems. There was a similar backlash to "Carl's first date" where everyone was saying "How dare he betray Ellie that way" just from the ANNOUNCEMENT. And with HT, there's the whole "But you only zing once" thing (which they DEAL with in the MOVIE) and there seems to be this impulse of either the first love being the real important love or the 2nd love somehow cheapening the first or meaning they're forgotten or betrayed somehow? Also it being this jealous thing? Like, I see it being complicated maybe, not wanting to be compared, but...often there's this jealousy between #2 and #1 instead of understanding BOTH can be important in a person's life. At least the amatonormativity response and finding romance overdone or forced angle I understand as an aroace myself. I get the frustration of everyone having to be paired up and there ALWAYS being a love interest even though I do love those films. However, you're watching a film series with essentially a soulmate premise. Half the films have been about romance at this point. AND, personally, it solves a rather amatonormative problem of "A person can only have one true love" that the original zing concept had. It not only gives (in my opinion) good and important rep for 2nd love and step families which ARE needed, BUT it also shows that someone can unlearn hate and get out of a bad situation.
Others have claimed she's weird, ugly, looks like a sex doll (ok, she DOES kinda have Betty Boop's face on Olive Oyl's body wrapped in a Debbie Jelinsky wrapper, but that's the POINT. She's SUPPOSED to be a goof.) A genderbent Popeye (Personally I think she's more like Olive Oyl, but...fair.) "Why would Drac fall for someone who tried to kill him" Drac being a bad parent (The dude freaked and built a fake town to scare Mavis from leaving out of anxiety of her getting hurt, then spent most of the movie covering up his mistake before owning up to it and nearly getting himself BURNED to DEATH fixing it. He's an anxious dork, but he genuinely tries his best. He even DID almost tell Mavis before he got distracted. Give the man some slack. Dude's not the best under pressure. All of which fits GREAT with the morally grey Stan, BTW.) Alot of comparing Ericka unfavorably to Martha, too. ("She's weird, Martha was prettier") and the "Well she still tried to kill monsters, so..." ON THE "BLORBO WAR CRIMES ENEMIES TO LOVERS WE SUPPORT WOMEN'S WRONGS" WEBSITE!!! Hell, on the same site we're seeing people ship an old man with a crazy dream dorito demon who not only used and manipulated the guy to his own ends for power, but tried to kill a good chunk of his family WITHOUT REMORSE!!! No hate to the toxic old man yaoi Billford, just...someone make it make sense, please. XD How in the world is THAT ok and THIS is not? Is it just because they're het? (Passing? I got my own headcanons there.)
So like...yeah. It's unfair. I think alot of it is the 2nd love thing and all the Drac simps going crazy along with the amatonormative thing on both sides of the coin. Personally, I think they're adorable middle-aged dorks who are both somewhat fucked up in a fun family friendly Addamsy way. It's like if Debbie actually fell for Fester and joined the Addams family instead of trying to kill them. (And yes, it IS enemies to lovers, in a way! Mostly one-sided, though Drac did used to have his own issues on humans back in the first film.)
Sorry for the rant, I got ALOT of feelings about this. XD But it does work well! Especially Stanley. The old loveable goofball dork who's kinda fucked up/morally grey but loves his family works BEAUTIFULLY with Drac. And the S/I looks GOOD in Ericka's uniform! I also love the posing, too!
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about to do something crazy btw
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marauder-exe · 5 years ago
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Prompt List #2
Welcome to my biggest prompt list ever
if you wanna request something from this list, just use the character and ‘ prompt 34 from prompt list #2′ thank u!
Theres like 200 so be wary
Angst
“I love you ! Is that what you wanted to hear ?”
“I love him/her, and I know that I shouldn’t.”
“Can you just shut your mouth ?”
“wHY DO YOU KEEP LYING TO ME ?”
“We both know that I should walk away, but I can’t.”
“Wait, he/she has a girlfriend/boyfriend ?"
“I lo—-” “No, please… Don’t say that. You love her/him, not me.”
"Could you just take this pain away ? It hurts, so much… Help me.”
“You’re safe here, I got you.”
“Don’t ask her out again, please… You’re killing me, every single time you ask that.”
“Look, he/she wants you, just make him/her happy.”
“If you go, I’ll know that you never loved me.”
“We never were just friends, and you know it.” “I know it, but you deserve someone better than me.”
“SHE WAS CRYING BECAUSE OF YOU!!!”
“You love me like I’m the person who actually deserves your love.” “But you are the only one who deserves it.”
“I know for a fact that you’re not “fine”.”
“You’re looking at me like.. you’re disgusted. What did I do? Just tell me what I did, please!”
“What happened between us?”
“Nothing has changed!” “Yes it has, and you know it.”
“Love isn’t supposed to hurt this badly.”
“You said you needed space. You were 5,000 miles away for a year, and you’re still unsure. I’m starting to think that an entire universe apart wouldn’t be enough space for you.”
“I remember when he/she/they used to look at me that way”
“I want you to list every lie you ever told me. Then I’ll forgive you.”
“I don’t hate you. I hate that after all of this, you’re still trying to lie to me”
“I can’t keep this secret for you anymore.”
“I’m sorry I’m not what you signed up for.”
“Why she/her/them? It could have been anybody, and you chose to betray me with her/him/them.”
“This will be the last time you lie to me.”
“You never loved me, did you?”
“You made me miserable and I still loved you.”
“Everytime something goes well, I momentarily forget how much I despise you.”
“We’re never going to have a happy ending, just remember that.”
“Don’t pretend like you’re not happy to see me like this.”
“Your mind must be a horrible place.”
“Hand me the gun and I’ll kill him myself.”
“And I thought you loved me."
" And I thought I loved you."
" Aren't you even going to cry?"
“I didn’t expect you to wait forever. I just hoped…”
“Did you always know that you were going to leave?”
“If you cry, I’ll stay, and if I stay that will just give you another reason to hate me.”
“I’m addicted and at this point I don’t think anything could make me stop.”
”If you wanna know, then ask.”
“You never asked because you knew I wouldn’t tell you what you wanted to hear.”
“We grew apart, and at this point I’m glad.”
“Find somebody else to kiss your ass.”
“When are you going to stop clawing for something that’s never going to happen?”
“What you’re doing is going to kill you one day.”
“It was easier to believe that the you I knew was dead than deal with the fact that I still have to see you every day.”
“What you’re doing is going to kill you one day.”
Fluff
51. “You’re hair is really soft after you wash it.”
52. “Ssh. Stop fussing. I’m just braiding your hair.”
53. “You smell really nice.”
54. “Would it be all right if I borrowed your sweater? It smells like you.”
55. “I might have slept with your robe when you were gone.”
56. “If you steal the blankets, I am going to put my cold feet on you.”
57. “Here, let’s share the blanket.”
58. “You’re comfy.”
59.“You are very endearing when you are half-asleep.”
60.“But I want to hear you sing.”
61.“Don’t get up - I’ll do it.”
62.“Care to give me a back scratch?”
63.“I think I love you.”
64.“Your bed head is really cute.”
65.“How about a kiss?”
66.“You made this for me?”
67.Aw, you’re blushing.”
68. Uh oh, I know that look. What do you want?”
69. “Let me help you with that.”
70. “I don’t want to forget this moment.”
71.“Are you really flirting with me right now?”
72.“I like the way your hand fits in mine.”
73.“You have something in your hair, umm… Do you want me to get it out?”
74.“It’s nice that your voice was the first thing I heard today.”
75.“This movie is really scary, but you’re into it so I’m trying not to cover my face the whole time, but- WHAT IS THAT?”
76.“Wait, don’t pull away… Not yet.”
77.“Half the time I get too embarrassed to say anything”
78.“No, it’s fine.  I can wait until you’re done talking to them.”
79.“No, like…. It’s just, I can’t believe you’re actually wearing my clothes.”
80.“You’re a big piece of inspiration for this, honestly.”
81.“I’ve been trying to get ready for like an hour and a half, because I know you’re going to look so good and I need to try and match up.”
82.“I wanted to say “I love you” for the first time without stuttering, but that failed.”
83.“My friends get so annoyed by how much I talk about how sometimes.”
84.“No, mom, don’t tell him/her I said that about him/her!”
85.“I can’t get over how a few months ago I wanted to learn your name and now you’re having breakfast with me in my sweater.”
86.“ You are so beautiful — So fucking beautiful. “
87.“And just WHERE do you think you’re putting your hands?”
88.“Wow, you look even better in the daylight.”
89.“I don’t remember ever having this many hickeys. But I don’t mind.”
90.“We could order pizza and just stay like this all day.”
91.“It was always you.”
92.I love you in every possible way.”
93.“I didn’t mean to love you so much.”
94.“Don’t you hurt a single hair on his/her/their head.”
95.“Duck, you idiot!”
96.“Hey. Pal. I’ve got a wand and I’m not afraid to use it.”
97.“Shh, you’re safe. I won’t let you go.”
98.“It’s not a double date. We’re just third and fourth wheeling.”
99.“Look, I know we don’t know each other that well, but I’m still worried about you. No one deserves to be alone.”
100.“I remember practicing how to ask you out in the mirror..”
Sarcasm
101.“Define normal.” 
102.“Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?” 
103.“Just remember if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English.” 
104.“Don’t look for any redeeming qualities. I don’t have any.” 
105.“It’s amazing how fast the world can go from bad to total shit storm.”
106.“I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.” 
107.“And you wonder why you’re still single.”
108.“Remind me to kill you. Please.” 
109.“That’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think?”
110.“She’s crazy. And just when you think you’ve reached the bottom of her craziness, there’s a crazy underground garage.” 
111.“She may seem like lollipops and rainbows but I bet behind close doors she’s latex and whips.”
112.“If my day gets any worse, I’m asking hell if they’re having an exchange program.” 
113.“Sorry. I don’t speak skank.” 
114.“My middle finger salutes you.” 
115.“I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel.” 
116.Somebody’s cranky.” “Somebody needs to shut up.” 
117.“Oh darling. Go buy a brain.” 
118.“Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” 
119.“All due respect, but that’s a bunch of crap.” 
120.“I am one of the few people in the world who can murder you and leave no forensic evidence behind.”
121.“Excuse me. I have to go make a scene.” 
122.“What did I tell you about calling her/him the devil?” “That it’s offensive to the devil?” 
123.“I heard that!” “You were supposed to!” 
124.“I need therapy after this.” 
125.“You didn’t get in trouble for lying. You got in trouble for lying badly.” 
126.“I turned out liking you a lot more that I originally planned.” 
127.“I think you’re weird.” “I think you’re boring.” 
128.“I’m afraid I’ve been thinking…” “A dangerous pastime.”
129.“Wow, there’s a big surprise. I think I’m going to have a heart attack and die from surprise.” 
130.“I’m gonna hit you so hard, it’ll make you ancestors dizzy.” 
131.“Sarcasm is the body’s natural reaction to stupidity.” 
132.“Well, excuse me, psychic wonder!” 
133.“Don’t look in her eyes, she might steal your soul.” 
134.“She’s hot, but she’s evil.” 
135.“Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.” 
136.“I already know that I’m going to hell. At this point it’s really go big or go home.” 
137.“I’m not a damsel in distress. I’m a damsel doing damage.” 
138.“So stick that in your juice box and suck it.” 
139.“Never take life seriously. No one ever comes out alive anyway.” 
140.“Sometimes I question my sanity. Occasionally it replies.”
141.“Why should we date?” “Because we are attracted to each other.” “I am attracted to pie, but I do not feel the need to date pie.” 
142.“Neither one us is drunk enough for this conversation.” 
143.“You’re questioning my methods.” “I’m not questioning it, I’m saying it’s stupid.” 
144.“Wow, somebody needs a Happy Meal.” 
145.“I didn’t do it!” “Then why are you laughing?” “Because whoever did it is a freaking genius.” 
146.“Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots.” 
147.“You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.
148.“Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit.” 
149.“Rule number one: don’t bother sucking up. I already hate you, that’s not going to change.” 
150.“You make no sense to me.” “Welcome to my life.” 
Drama
151.“Can you stop thinking about yourself for once?”
152.“Can you stop thinking about yourself for once?” 
153.“Don’t think I forgot about what you did last time.”
154.“I know you lied to me.”
155.“I’m not even sorry.”
156.“You backstabber!” 157.“I never want to see you again.” 158.“You never mattered to me.”
159.“I knew this was a bad idea.”
160.“Rot in hell.”
161.“It was supposed to be a secret!”
162.“No one loves me.” 163.“He/she/they is/are so petty…” 164.“You made me cry.” 165.“I don’t know who you are anymore.” 166.“How DARE you?!” 167.“I know you’re not talking to me…” 168.“I SAW you with him/her/them!”
169.“Just leave me alone.”
170.“What did you do?!” 171.“I told everyone that I didn’t want to talk but I’m actually dying for attention.”
172. “Just admit that was extra…”
173.“I forgive, but I don’t forget.” 174.“Did you see what he/she/they was/were wearing?” 175.“So what if I had sex with your ex?” 176.“There’s something I have to tell you…” 177.“I can’t do this anymore.” 178.“You weren’t there for me when I needed you the most.” 179.“I never loved you.” 180.“It’s too late.”
181.“Quit ignoring me.”
182. “Don’t you get it? It’s because I love you!”
183.“I love you. I’m sorry.”
184.“I don’t want to be friends.”
185.“Can we please pretend I never said that?”
186.“Friendzoned again.”
187.“You should’ve loved me when you had the chance.”
188.“Fuck you for toying with my emotions like that.”
189.“I was there for you when no one else was!”
190.“Alright – I can tell a ‘no’ when I hear it.”
191.“I’m sorry I acted so creepy.”
192.“Fuck. It’s like what they say – nice guys finish last…”
193.“I’m tired of keeping this secret. Even if you don’t love me back.”
194. “I knew that’d be your answer. That’s why I never told you before.”
195.“When I said I loved you, I meant it.”
196.“Is there any part of you, deep down, that might love me back?”
197.“You were the one that left all those notes for me?”
198.“You’re in a relationship with another person – you know this can’t end well.”
199.“We agreed this was just physical!”
200.“I love you. I know you don’t love me, so don’t say it back.”
Ahhh im sorry that was so long, but if you read all the way to here, your a real one.
Again i write for all Hp characters! Feel free to use these prompts as ur own
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Okokok here this: april, reader and casey try to prank the boys. How does it go. With who does it fails/success, what was the prank, do they get caught? Do the boys get revenge, and if so, how?
Also, splinter sees it all unfolds, does he just gets himself a snack and watch, or does he tries to subtly join in without getting caught? (We all know hes got a playful side cmon)
Bonus: they try to prank vern too, maybe the boys join in to prank him? What do they do? Does he retaliate?
Okay so I admit I let my brain go nuts on this one, so it's a little long but I was cackling the entire time I was writing it.
TMNT Headcanons
Prank Wars
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Leonardo
In your complete and utter defence, Leo had 100% started this
And also in your defence, you did tell him not to
Twice
But he tricked you into watching a horror movie and ended up dying your hair green
This meant war
You'd even wrapped up April and Casey into it
Their problems were your problems
Which meant that April was the one who convinced Splinter not to say anything to his sons
He was perfectly happy to oblige
Casey was just there to help set things up
And you liked the way his mind worked
The objective wasn't to go unnoticed, there would be no point in doing it and having no proof
You were doing this to prove that you could
Leo had emphasized that he couldn't be distracted
That you were to obvious and clumsy to prank him without him noticing
Challenge fucking accepted
And that's how you ended up at the kitchen table eating lunch with April and Casey when the boys were coming back from meditating with Splinter
April kept having to shove food in her mouth to hide her laughter
Casey just decided to wear sunglasses
And you kept overpowering the urge to smirk
"Hey guys, good to see you. Y/n have you seen my katanas?"
With the obstruction of water in your mouth you just nodded at him, pointing to the other room
He sauntered off, none the wiser to your victorious grin
When he came back in only a moment later his expression had done a complete 180
Leo made direct eye contact with you and you held that stare like a wolf cornered in its den
"does someone want to explain why my katanas are encased in blueberry jello?"
You raised your hand like a child in class
"hate to break it to you, but it's actually berry blue you uncultured bitch"
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Raphael
Ohhhh you were so undeniably dead
A whole other level of six feet under
It wasn't a surprise that April and Casey had backed out on this one
It also wasn't a surprise that Splinter had offered to stand up for you if things went sideways
Donnie even gave you a sheet of paper with a list of hiding spots before hand
All of this went completely unnoticed by Raph, the target of your latest scheme.
And that was fine, you had only one objective here-
Make it out alive
But it was amazing what 1 person could do with some extra cash and internet access
So that's what led you to your current position.
Cross legged on the bench, watching the large red terrapin get ready for his first set, that in itself wasn't unusual, you always watched him lift just in case you needed to run and grab someone if something went wrong
Raph was none the wiser to your plan
At least that's what you thought
Your book was in your lap and you were calmly scanning your pages, somewhat comprehending the words but keeping a very close eye on the turtle across from you
"Hey y/n?"
You peeked over the edge of your book to meet his eyes
And your heart sank to your stomach
"Yeah Raph?"
He smirked at you, taking a lumbering step forward
"You ever seen that episode of the Office where Jim fills Dwight's phone with nickels so when he takes 'em out Dwight punches himself in the face?"
Shit shit shit shit shit shit-
"Uh... No, can't say that I have, why do you ask?"
That damn smile got even wider and all of your muscles tensed, you were ready to bolt
"I'm giving you a fifteen second headstart. Starting right now."
You flew to your feet and sprinted out of the weight room
"DONNIE WE GOTTA CODE RED!"
Your lungs were ready to burst by the time you made it to your decided hiding spot. Heavy footsteps went right underneath you and you held your breath, you wouldn't dare move.
You didn't come down until hours later when Splinter came and coaxed to you out of hiding
But deep down you knew you'd started something you couldn't finish.
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Vern Fenwick
You didn't even have to convince the guys to partake in this
You didn't even get the chance to tell them what you were planning
They were already brainstorming
None of you let a word of it slip to April, she would've shut you down faster than you could blink
A complete buzz kill
But fake blood was relatively cheap and all of Vern's flooring was tile (meaning extremely easy to clean and bleach)
Donnie had really been the mastermind behind the execution, none of you had any idea how he'd rigged the apartment plumbing
But he'd assured you it would only affect Vern's suite and no one else's so you didn't concern yourself with it further
And after the fact you had to wonder what exactly the former cameraman was planning on the date he'd been in the middle of
All you knew was that you got a very frantic call from the falcon himself yelling about blood coming out of his tap and the sink wouldn't shut off and it was everywhere and what the fuck was happening?
You all knew that Splinter thought it was hilarious, he'd never been particularly fond of Vern
But he did make his sons assist in the clean up and bleaching of the victims apartment floor
You went too and offered moral support
Vern had hit on you one too many times, so there was no way you'd feel bad about this
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Michaelangelo
As far as pranking went, you and Mikey were partners in crime
He always had great ideas and you always came up with the best ways to execute those ideas without getting caught
But when you separated those two chaos was guaranteed
You weren't entirely sure how you had been pitted against each other but you weren't entirely mad about it
You couldn't say the same for anyone else though, the others had been on edge all week.
Pranking Mikey was a challenge, he knew how you worked and vice versa
You'd been brainstorming with April for weeks now, maybe a new perspective would help
That's what the two of you told yourselves anyways
Much to your dismay, Mikey and Casey had been plotting against you as well, the traitor.
And perhaps even more unfortunate was the fact that both of your pranks somehow overlapped and backfired on the rest of the family
Because Mikey and Casey may have replaced the family tea set with a edible sugar replica that looked identical to the original
So that when you were asked to make tea for Splinter and Leo it would dissolve the second you poured the hot tea
But they didn't tell anyone else so Leo was left with an impromptu anxiety attack when he made his own tea before sitting down to meditate and it melted into sugary leaf water
And you and April had planned the 'cutting off your finger in the kitchen' with the knife, fake finger, and fake blood
Which in theory should've worked because Mikey was in the kitchen the most, that was his territory
However once you'd started your plan you couldn't stop it
so when you 'cut your finger off' and screamed for Mikey you didn't have time to yell "wait it's a prank!" before Donnie caught a glimpse of the scene and fainted
In your defence you didn't know the purple turtle could move that fast
And to Mikey's relief he was going to throw that cutting board out anyways
Splinter explicitly banned the two of you from pranking each other after that incident
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Donatello
Per your own common sense you had come to the conclusion that pranking the families resident genius was a horribly stupid idea
So for once, you'd practiced some self control and refrained from any pranks involving Donnie
Now that's not to say that the turtle vowed from aiming any pranks towards you
He had morals but messing with you walked the line separating adorable from batshit crazy
And he was all for it
April advised against it severely and even Splinter seemed to think it wasn't the best idea, but that was a lesson his son had to learn on his own
On the flip side, the second Casey heard about Donnie's plan he was all for it
So when you came over for dinner they both had to hide their excited smiles as Casey passed you your spaghetti
He knew it was your favorite
Everyone else was oblivious, which looking back on it was a very bad thing
April had her suspicions that Donnie was pulling something this evening, but she couldn't put her finger on it
That wasn't until you swirled a mouthful of noodles around your fork and shoved it into your mouth, you were starving
Here lies your predicament-
You swallowed thickly and blinked like you were in pain, your hand went to your throat and you reached for your water, ending up chugging almost the entire bottle.
Your eyes met Donnie's in a serious type of concern
"Is there hot sauce in this?"
April choked on her breadstick and quickly covered her mouth
Casey hadn't picked up on it yet
"Awh yeah- how'd you figure it out so quickly?"
You erupted in a coughing fit that sent April rushing to your side before you could tumble to the floor
"You fucking assholes! Y/N has a capsaicin allergy! Casey go start the car we need to get them to the hospital!"
On the bright side you were fine after you were rushed to the ER
But you didn't speak to Donnie or Casey for two weeks following the accident
You eventually forgave them for it and they haven't targeted you since
Sorry if it got a little dark at the end, but I felt like it was more realistic. Also that has actually happened to me but it was a nut allergy (and that's how I found out I was allergic to cashews) But I feel like the ending was a good example of how pranking someone can go horribly wrong, you should always consider the possibilities before doing something that could cause harm to a person. (Unless they really really deserve it)
I really enjoyed writing this one and I hope you guys like it as much as I do! 😁🧡👍
-Mars 🌠
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herstarburststories · 4 years ago
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He didn’t make it to 42
Pairing: Dean Winchester x reader
Summary: it’s Dean’s birthday, you go to visit him with some news and things that need to be said.
A/N: Happy bday, De.
Warnings: so much angst, mentions of sex, hopeful/happy ending (?)
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Dean’s dead. It’s Dean’s birthday and he’s dead. You can’t argue much.
Sam denied the demon blood inside him, and that didn’t stop its evil nature from growing and gasping for his fresh air to the point he was almost shocked alive. Dean denied his dad’s destructive methods’ results for the longest time, and that didn’t stop the cicatrixes in every emotion he had ever shown. You denied the absence of Dean and that didn’t stop the bricks cracking in your soul. There’s only so far you can go with your eyes closed.
So here you are. Standing in front of an empty grave. You are bigger than the dull tombstone, yet you can’t help but not to feel tall, at all. How can you even start to talk? Talking to Dean used to be easy even when it got hard and now you’re feeling like a lost kid in a supermarket. Your snide thinking spells out his name with venom, saying it isn’t easy for you to open your barmy mouth and spill out contrarian shit because this isn’t Dean, just another meaningless symbolism that Sam promises that will help. The real Dean died almost a year ago, he was burned in a hunter’s funeral, the flames dancing over his body as the smell of burnt meat invaded your nostrils. Whenever you try to remember his fragrance, that manly aroma which you loved to scent each morning, all your brain can come up with is the odor of his skin and guts burning. The smell lingers like bad perfume, it doesn’t matter how many times you wash yourself with his soap-- that only broke your heart worse.
But today is Dean’s birthday. He deserves a visit, even if it’s not him. Then you go and attempt to deal with the desolation, push it away just a little, and pick up something from the enormous pile of things you wish to tell Dean. You glance at the cold tombstone: Dean Winchester. 1979 - 2020. Beloved son, big brother, and husband. Hunter. A hero. Simple definitions that can never make it up for who he was and what he meant. You purse your lips and cough a little, a gentle wind touches your cheek so tenderly. If you were still a believer, you’d think this is some sort of sign, Dean’s presence or some other pious hoax. All you do now is to remain in quietude, a deep breath. Ultimately, your voice comes:
‘’You didn’t make it to forty two, huh?’’ You scoff humorless, reminiscing to the multiple days that Dean said he wouldn’t go past 35. He did live each year like it was the last--- you aren’t sure if it's such a good thing. If you carry on like your days are outnumbered, you are silently entertaining yourself until death's knock on your door. ‘’I always hated when you were right. Let’s be honest, you had the words of a pessimist and the wants of an optimist. Still, if you were to be right about something, it would be about a bad situation. A nest with too many vampires, how crappy the motel’s bedroom would be, or how that third glass of wine would make me tipsy. So yeah, I always hated when you were right. And look at you now! You aren’t right, you aren’t wrong. You are dead! And I’m the crazy girl screaming at an empty tombstone.’’
You let out a laugh empty of joy. That’s how a hunter’s life is: you die and people stop talking about you because it’s too sad or too long gone to hold any pity, meanwhile the ones who recall about you go loud with all the spirits in their heads. You put your hand in the pockets of the heavy leather jacket that once belonged to a green eyed man who would be turning 42 today, some strange force causing you to speak again.
‘’Wow.’’ You shake your head to the blue way you paint the scene until you notice that you never greeted him. ‘’Hey.’’ The simple word adds a comical insult to injury. ‘’Guess the dead don’t care about manners, huh?’’ You arch your eyebrows with a grin that demonstrates anything but happiness. ‘’Miracle died. Sam digged a hole next to the bunker and buried him there. He isn’t the same since you died, you know? Not the deceased dog-- Well, he wasn’t the same either. Always whining and scratching your door like a fucking cat, and sniffing your old boots. He made me company in your bed and I whined as much as he did when you didn’t come back home that day. He stood by the door most days, waiting for you to appear. I can’t judge him, I did the same.’’ You shrug, not caring about how risible that confession may look. It's true. You became as irrational as a loyal dog at some point in this sorrow. ‘’And Sam, your baby brother… I think he died with you right there, Dean. He didn’t try to bring you back as he promised, but I shouted and screamed so much. I said I would burn the bunker and throw Baby over a cliff if he didn’t-- if he didn’t let me try. I lived up to the mad woman title.’’
You are crestfallen, pacing on top of where the eldest Winchester - Sam’s brand new nomination -  supposedly was buried. You know your boots barely touch an infected land, there's no deceased man under your steps. The dead thing is in you.
‘’I spent days dragging your body everywhere and nowhere, anywhere I could catch a crumb of relief in hope to bring you back. But I couldn’t. Jack could, but that ungrateful idiot doesn’t wanna follow his grandpa steps and get too attached to mere humans, the creation or whatever. As if we are just some skin and bone to him, as if you are just another human.’’
You sit down on the tombstone, some tender solace in being close to a thing that's supposed to represent him, like sleeping hugged to a pillow or waking up to a photograph of his. Your nails sink against the gelid concrete at the thought of screaming into the sky for the new God that seemed as deaf as the last one. His calm answer to your burning pain. How he dared to tell you he knew what he was doing— as if he was the original lord and not a three years old. You can't make him do it, so you hold on the fury of some overthrown nation.
‘’Anyway, I couldn’t bring you back. Your body, well, you know how human anatomy works. Your body started to smell like death. We tried to stop with human and magic ways, and it wouldn’t work because you were dead. You should’ve seen the doctor’s face when we got you in that fancy hospital tha night. I think we traumatized the doctor with so much violence and trauma. She didn’t even give us a false hope or anything, you know? She just asked about organ donation of what was left. She just wanted to take every little thing out of you, as if you were just another accident on a Tuesday night.’’ Your shake your head as the memories and your points start to mix, it's hard to discern things and keep a straight line when you have an open wound in your insides. ‘’Well, they couldn’t bring you back to life, and neither could Rowena or whatever I looked for. Don’t be mad because I tried, Winchester. You know I’m too stubborn for my own good. I had to try.’’ you refuse to apologize, yet adds the playful words in his eulogy. ‘’But then your body started to stink and God, how could I continue to be so violent to your corpse? That was when I decided to listen to you for the first time and to Sam, so I let you go. I hate you for asking that.’’ What an ambiguous, contradictory truth to bare. You are glimpses of a person for months because of Dean Winchester, still have the energy to argue his selfless logic, just to love him even more. He's got your devotion, but man you can hate him sometimes. ‘’I hate you for going on that stupid hunt. I hate you for being dead, you giant idiot that I love so much.’’ You can't bring your mouth to say loved. "I was always telling you to let the past go and now I’m in love with a dead thing. What a comic way to end our history. I told you that Miracle died, right? I don’t know if dogs go to heaven, but I hope he’s in there with you. I wonder what your heaven is like. I bet it has Whiskey.''
Your dry chuckle makes your notice the tears in your eyes, glistening your orbs as they go like a waterfall to be absorbed by the thirsty land after leaving your cheeks.
"Sam and I-- We tried to make some sense out of this cruelty, but we can’t. You are dead and I can’t seem to put it past me. I still sleep in your bed, and I can still taste your body burning on the roof of my mouth in the quiet nights. I cried this morning because someone asked for a burger, can you believe that? It was so stupid since I used to shake my head and argue with you about cholesterol. Suddenly I was crying at lunch in a restaurant because some stupid kid asked for a burger with extra bacon. They sang Happy birthday to this dumbass child, and I interrupted with my awful crying, and wished that you were celebrating your birthday and not that kid. I guess you could say I wish death upon an innocent child with a problematic eating routine.’’ That was a whole new level of low, as if you are the one wrapped with the sentiment of laying six feet under.
‘’Everyone tells you about how grief is singular and particular with similar emotions that bring people who went through this together. They even have that crap stages thing and all that. You know what they don’t tell you?’’ Your mouth shuts for a moment, like you are waiting some response. You nod as if whatever you were expecting is handed to you. ‘’Grief can be fucking ridiculous. Who cries because of a burger full of oil and cardiac diseases? Who cries because they found a grocery store recipe under her dead boyfriend’s bed? Who falls on the ground screaming in the middle of the mall because they saw a flannel? Who? Those things are so stupid.’’ You smile like there's no tomorrow and the laugh leaving your lips is a treacherous tone. Perhaps you just aren't build up to express joy anymore. ‘’You see it in the movies and in the books and you think, you know, you think to yourself that grieving is being sad on special dates and randomly remembering the loved ones because of some screaming memory, like a flannel or their perfume. Thing is, it’s not just that. All your body seems so small, so tight for all the ache and agony inside it. Your senses go wild, you are not just one person in one place. You’re just the pain everywhere, like being pulled apart and you beg to jump in the fucking grave with them. At least you would be together, at least you would feel like one person and not suffering edges of a broken earthy thing. And--And you start remembering things you didn’t even know you had mesmerized. I look at the ceiling and remember you saying you’d paint it someday. I look at the kitchen and remember me screaming at you for giving Miracle the rest of the food. I smell Sam’s clothes and started crying because hey, they don’t smell like alcohol. You don’t iron them while drinking anymore, so of course they don’t smell like cheap beer.’’ You are chuckling through the tears and it only makes it more monstrous. ‘’Everything is you now that you are gone. Every man has something similar to you, every garden is green as your eyes, and each step sounds like you are coming home. They didn’t prepare me, not for this.’’ You said breathless. A soft single follows. The knife cuts both ways; the empty breeze and the words hurt. Where's the middle term? Where's the limbo? Where's the only safe place for you to rest your weary head?
Out of nowhere, you blurt out, ‘’I can’t masturbate,’’ I know it’s something stupid and even selfish to say, but I think you’d like to know. I can’t masturbate. That’s a part of the whole losing someone process that people are too ashamed to discuss, or maybe they don’t have the urge to be touched anymore because after someone you love dies, after someone-- the hands who touched are dead and cold, you become a haunted object. That’s how I feel most days, like I’m a haunted house because you touched me and now you’re dead and some days I believe I am too.’’ You look around the places. It's beautiful. It's lonely. It has trees and flowers and green. Not as green as Dean's eyes, but it doesn't matter anymore. He doesn't even have eyes at this point. ‘’Well, I can’t masturbate. I can’t touch myself. And I can’t ask someone else either. I tried and ended up punching the guy, Dean. I swear. I panicked when he was between my legs and just punched his nose. You’d have liked it, you were always the jealous kind. I won’t admit that, but I thought it was kinda hot. Especially when you got possessive in sex.’’ A dirty grin appeared on your lips, the echoes of luxury lasting in your eyes for a brief moment. ‘’I don’t think I can be cared for anymore, honestly. Sam tried to hug me when Miracle died and I… It was like I wasn't there. I got frozen in time, and I live in my sleep. In my nightmares you are alive. I  dream about the day you died every week and I used to wake up screaming, but now those nightmares are the only proof you were alive now that you’re as dead as the police report says this time. It was the most painful, calamitous moment for you and I swear it was a nightmare for me, but then I realized that at least I had you there, egoistical or not, I made my nightmare into a dream.’’ You aren't sure which opinion Dean would have on that. Would he understand? Would he shake his head? You wish you can ask him just this one more thing, just beg him to write it down for you on how to be without him here.
You raise on your feet, glaring at the name craved in the concrete. The tears go by still, although they're as usual as the blood in glir veins at this point. ‘’Death is so silly. What it takes, anyway?" Each word conquers more inches of pure wrath. ''People die because they stumbled on their own feet and hit their head somewhere, or they drove their car too close and too fast to the cliff, or because they were giving birth, or because they dated the wrong person, or because they were hunting a fucking vampire and got impaled. What are the chances? How stupid, and idiotic is death? Always creeping and waiting to bite and chew a piece of you-- Taking every scrap of you from me like that’s its right.’’ You are screaming, starting to kick and punch the tombstone with any piece of straight you have. Your limbs hurt and the blood is visible, but you keep going. ‘’YOUR STUPID DOG DIED, DEAN! AND YOU DIED! AND I DIED! SAMMY DIED! YEAH, IS SAID SAMMY! GO AHEAD, TELL ME ONLY YOU CAN CALL HIM THAT.’’ Another punch, your knuckles are ripped. Another kick, your boot as a hole. ‘’DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.’’ Kick. ‘’SAMMY, SAMMY, SAMMY!’’ A punch to each name. Anything to get a reaction, to get comfort. Anything. ‘’YOU CAN’T BECAUSE YOU ARE DEAD.’’ Gasping for something you don't need anymore, sweet oxygen, your eyes are on the tombstone again. And the definitions. And the trees. Your body is sore and aching. It is the kind and coercion no person wants which you needed; the freedom of feeling outside the exact pain that was inside. ‘’You can’t because you are dead. I’ve been playing some sick games in my mind, you know? Sam stopped hunting and had his closure. He was always better at letting go than you and I, but he’s still hurting. I never saw him hurting so much. I think he knows you won’t come back this time, how could you make us promise something like that?  Well, my twisted game is a bunch of misleading what ifs. What if you hadn’t gone after John? What if you hadn’t gone on that last hunt? What if you had stayed with Lisa? At first I didn’t like her much. Jealous, I admit that. But she grew on me. She gave you something I couldn’t back then and I’ll always be thankful for that. And even though it would rip me apart, I’d rather you to die at sixth after living your suburban dream with her. Have another kid besides Ben, maybe a girl this time, and just have that apple pie life. You and Sam would live close and your kids would always play. They’d be as close as brothers. Maybe I’d get a guy and bring my own kids and we could’ve a barbecue and everyone would be happy. But we don’t get soft epilogues here. It ends how it starts, right? Bloody and desperate. I thought maybe, maybe Lisa could understand what’s going through my head now. I drove to her new address and parked close to her house. I must have spent hours there, thinking if I should come in or not, If she somehow remembered after Castiel died or if I could make her brain work again if I told her the truth. But then I just drove back home and fell asleep wrapped in that stupid lumberjack flannel of yours. The one I always mocked, yeah? She may understand me, but I know you wouldn’t want that. You want her, you want me and Sam to be happy. I don’t know if I can do that, Dean. It’s like myt brittle soul shrewd and my body is just waiting to collapse.’’ You signed, overwhelmed by the battle without an anthem. The victory with no triumph. Is it still a win when you don't have someone to come home too? ‘’Your dog died, it’s the first birthday you didn’t live to see, and I bought all the things you told Mrs Butters you wanted for your birthday because it’s your birthday. I just don’t know how to celebrate it with you dead. People stop counting after they die, right? They just say he’d have been 42 or he died at 41. They give melancholy smiles when they wake up and check the day on their phones and a woe atmosphere swallows them for the rest of the day. Then they get better the next day. I think everyday is your birthday.’’ You attempt to wipe away your tears, which only causes your pulsating hand to stain your face red. ‘’Dean, for the first time, what died stayed dead! Congrats.’’ Once again, a hysterical laugh. ‘’I wish but no. What died didn’t stay dead, you are alive, so alive in my head. I swear you are there some days. I wake and watch the door, so sure you’ll come back. Sam says I’m living in delusion and I have to wake up and keep going since that's what you would want. That's enough to make him keep going, but it only makes me angry. Everyone we know and some strangers looks at me like I'm a house on fire and no longer a warm home, like I'm a car accident. They think I don't notice but I do.’’ You look at your boots, the whole is rolling out blood like your hands. You feel closer to Dean. How sick.
‘’Help, I’m still right where you left me." You plea, his love lingering like a bruise. ''I think gravity is overwhelming and it keeps me here. Sometimes it’s like I’m one of those dusted books Sam used to read. Or those Bukowski ones that you hid, so we wouldn’t see how smart you’re. You tried so hard to hide your intelligence because you didn’t think you were entitled to it. You saw yourself as the protector and never the valuable one for protection. You, the man who made an EMF out of an old radio, who rebuilt the Impala from the ground multiple times, and who knew patterns better than any detective. The man who showed me I could rely on someone other than myself. The dude with a lopsided grin, tough hands and a heart of gold. I miss you so much. If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were singing all those classic rock songs and Taylor Swift pop hits, while I drove here. I would think you were home, smelling like guts because you wanted to eat before taking a shower after a hunt. I would think that you are in the Deancave, waiting for me to curl up on your lap to watch Scooby Doo or Doctor Sexy MD until we aren’t watching anymore. If I didn’t know better I would think no death could take you from me. There would be no tear us apart in our vows.’’ The only thing that keeps your organism working is that Dean died knowing how much you loved him. You never let this talk for later or never. No tomorrow is promised. That's a nice comfort, maybe that's what will help you to let go in the future. ‘’But yesterday your stupid, skink dog died and I lost the last living thing that I had from you. You know what’s more angerting? I cried and Sam cried and I noticed we were the living things you left behind and all we have is each other. All your closets of backlogged dreams were left for us-- so yeah. Sam is done hunting and he’s met a lovely girl, and they are moving in like in your domestic dreams. I’m taking care of the family business like your other contradictory dream and making sure Sam is safe enough to be normal. Because I have to, we have too. Stupidly enough, I still wait for the day you’ll burst out the door and tell us to hit the road again. I still watch every episode of your dumb tv shows to make sure I’ll know everything that happened when you ask. I still drive around in your car and close my eyes when the street is calm, only picturing you driving as Baby’s engineers go wild but those are my hands on the steering wheel. If I didn't know better, I’d think you are still around. But I know better. I still feel you all around. I love you.’’
Your monologuing ends as astutely as it stated. You get up, press a kiss to your ruined for the next weeks hands and place it on the rock with writings. You turn around and walk back to the car that you parked near, only in case of Dean wanting to see Baby. How knows? You and your clandestine faith. You lick your lip and get in the car.
You swear you the AC/DC cassette wasn't there before, but when you turn on the car and the radio it starts playing. It's the first true smile that comes to your mouth, it's bloodstained and you look like a shameless woman. With that you can deal.
It hurts a bearable hurt for now. You didn't think it was possible. Maybe someday.
The end.
(she takes a little longer to arive in heaven than sammy. his baby brother says that women are most likely to live around six years more than men. it doesn't ease him up, though. dean waited sam for too long, his platonic soulmate. and now he has to wait his romantic one too? the eldest Winchester considers it the best earthly present when the he sense you around, that smell of orange and apples. it's you, he knows before even turning around. he can't wait to love you again. your name rolls off your tongue so naturally, as if you had seen each other just yesterday: ‘’hey, y/n.’’)
But then again, nothing ever really ends, does it?
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REBLOG AND COMMENT. Feedback is magic and helps me!
Starburst's footnote: It just didn't feel right to make an author's note on the top. I wanted it all only to be an arrow to the story. So, this is my side note: it's six am and I'm up writing this after inspiration kissed me with a bruise in the middle of the night. Or more like grabbed my throat. Anyway, I had to write and finish this one to post today, even pushing sleep aside. Hey, we are writers, that's what we do! I've been watching the show since I was eleven and I cried like a baby with the finale. This series was just so important and crucial to molde aspects of relationships for me. The song marjorie by Taylor Swift was used here, and so was the line "you got my devotion/ but man, I can hate you sometimes" by Harry Styles. I told you guys I would use it somewhere! A special thanks to @msmarvelouswinchester​ who helped me with her encouraging and opinon. You are the best! And with all of this I wanna say: Happy bday, Dean Winchester!
REBLOG AND COMMENT! Feedback is magic! Especially about this fic, I’d like to know your opinion. Tags in the reblog! Send an ask or dm to get in the taglist.
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nobodylivesson · 4 years ago
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Bad Boy(Pt.1)
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Fandom : Marvel
Pairing : Peter Parker x Top! Male Reader
Requested? No
  »»————>❃<————«« 
Peter looked outside the window of his classroom cause he was very tired.There has been a lot of cases all over the city and Flash has been more of a dick these days.He didn’t wanted to do anything more than going back to Mr.Stark’s lab to work on stuff
“You alright Peter?” Ned asked to which Peter smiled and was about to say something when he was hit in the head by a big paper ball
Peter sighed and looked behind him to see Flash snickering as he asked “What’s the matter Penis?Got something to say?” making Peter scoff but he looked towards the front just in time to see his teacher enter the class along with someone else
Peter widened his eyes to see an Asian origin boy who was tall(definitely taller than him),his jet black hair was short which were parted in the middle,he looked very sleepy as a small yawn came out of his mouth and was that tattoo poking out of his left hand?
Peter wasn’t sure about that but what he was sure of that this guy looked very “Bad Boy” type
“Okay everyone,settle down.From today onward we would have a new student joining us.He just moved here to New York along with his father.Why don’t you introduce yourself?” Mr.Larson was looking towards the curios students before turning towards the boy who nodded
“Hey,name’s [Y/N] [L/N],moved here from South Korea cause my old man thought it was fucking fun to move in middle of new session.I would make friends with people I like on my own so don’t any of you come running to me to make friends and yeah I’m gay” [Y/N] said with such ease while his eyes were closed as if out of tiredness
Everyone were to shocked after [Y/N]’s introduction and a very awkward silence fell upon the room but Peter looked at [Y/N] with awed eyes as he thought the Asian guy was very brave(and very handsome now after looking closely)
Mr.Larson coughed to break the awkwardness before saying “We-well than Mr.[L/N] why don’t you sit behind Mr.Parker and Mr.Leeds?”
[Y/N] looked around the room before his eyes landed at a two guys with raised hands and walked towards them without saying anything to the teacher
[Y/N] sat down and looked at the boys front of him who were looking at him and he realized they both were deciding if they can greet him or not
“Hey” [Y/N] said and that caused both the boys to jolt in surprised before the one with a darker skin said with a smile “Hey mate, I’m Ned Leeds and welcome to Midtown High School” making [Y/N] nod and look towards Peter
Peter realized he was looking at him for a introduction so with an embarrassed face he says “I’m Peter,Peter Parker” making [Y/N] smirk a little at it causing Peter to go more red
The rest of the class went quite but Peter did tried to take some peeks at the Asian boy behind him who seemed very bored throughout the class
As soon as the class bell rang,[Y/N] just grabbed his stuff and walked out of the class as nobody tried to stop him due to finding him weird.But Peter made a beeline for the Asian boy in impulse as if the boy was a magnet Ned following Peter worriedly
“Hey [Y/N]!!” Peter shouts out of desperation when he saw the said boy almost disappear in the school’s crowd making many heads turn towards him along with [Y/N]’s
Peter with a very red face due to the all the stares directed towards him as he walked towards the now leaning figure of [Y/n] on the lockers while Ned looked at all this as if it was crazy
“How can I help you Parker?” [Y/N] for some reason said it in his accent making a shiver pass through his spine making him totally sure that this guy made him feel something
“I-uh-I know you are new to the uh-city along with the school so I wondering you know needed any help uh-to be shown around?” Peter said while perfectly stammering in the process and he cringing at what he said inside
[Y/N] seemed very blank for a few seconds before a smirk broke into his face as amusement clearly danced in his eyes making Peter’s spider senses intensely scream that this guy is danger but Peter stood rooted at his place
[Y/N] leaned forward and whispered at Peter’s now red ears with his accent again “I will see about that,Peter but thank you for the offer” before walking away from there without sparing a second glance
“Dude what the hell was that?!Didn’t you saw how [Y/N] acted at class-Are you alright?” Ned stopped his talk when he saw the unresponsive Peter looking at the direction [Y/N] went
“You are serious Peter??You’re a lost case now dude” Ned says making Peter whip his head towards his friend
“Don’t say nonsense Ned,I was just.................surprised by what he did” Peter tried his best to make a excuse but Ned looked unimpressed
“MJ would like to hear about this at lunch”
“Don’t you dare Ned!!”
»»————>❃<————««   
MJ did really liked hearing about the little interaction between Peter and the new student and soon enough Peter was just trying to ignore his friends teasing about his new fascination with the Asian boy so he can eat
Suddenly the sound of a tray hitting the table brought their attention to the side to see the one and only [Y/N] [L/N] standing there with a smirk
MJ was very surprised along with being curious at the new arrival,Ned was horrified cause he was a little scared of the new boy and Peter? He was very happy that [Y/N] was joining them
“Can I join you guys?” [Y/N] asks and the two boys looked at each other before nodding while MJ looked at him with kind of suspicious
“What is it?” [Y/N] asks with a frown while looking towards MJ who was surprised that the other boy didn’t hide his dislike of her staring at him
Nonetheless she replied back with a serious face “Why do you want to sit with us?I meant I thought you would be more of a loner type after what I heard of your speech?”
[Y/N] liked this girl who was straight forward like him so he with a smirk replies “It seems this school have some pretty stupid and annoying people who don’t understand words,so even after knowing what I said in the class and then again repeating it to other people later,many pests flocked to me.So I thought if I sat with other people they would give me some peace which seems to be working very well.Also these two seemed decent to me when we talked so I wanted to get along with them and Parker did gave a good offer to me?”
“So I can take you around??” Peter suddenly says when he realized what [Y/N] was talking about making [Y/N] answer back with a chuckle “Do entertain me a lot Peter” adding his accent to other boy’s name causing Peter to blush
“Anyway does this make you less suspicious,Miss?” [Y/N] ask with a smile to which MJ smirks while saying “Mary Jane Watson but you can call me MJ and I like ya”
“Same here” [Y/N] says with a smirk as the other two boys looked at each other before Ned slowly says “So,[Y/N] what kind of hobbies do you have?”
“I like playing drums and had played with some bands at clubs back at South Korea.Then I like going out with my bike at weekends to different towns before returning by Sunday night and other weekends having movie marathons,specially on Star Wars and Star Trek when I want to relax” [Y/N] said with a shrug
The other two boys looked at [Y/N] before they both enthusiastically asked “You like Star Wars?!” making [Y/N] chuckled before the boys got in a good talk about the series while MJ rolled her eyes at them but still read the book she was holding with a smile
»»————>❃<————««  
“You two are the biggest nerds I ever saw” [Y/N] said while snorting as MJ chuckled as well to it
“Oh shut up,you are a movie geek just like us” Peter snapped back at him
“Touche aren’t we now?But I didn’t know someone could have such fascination with Lego at High school.Don’t mind me I’m not judging just surprised” [Y/N] says with a chuckle to which MJ adds “Well then you haven’t see the worst of these two”
Ned just rolled his eyes as if he was used to all this and Peter just pouted making [Y/N] smile at this a little.[Y/N] is definitely a loner and barely made friends but this group of 3 friends were very fun and relaxing to be around
When he came to New York,he was sure he had to keep a lot of stuff secret and act like someone else(one thing he hates the most) to have a comfortable life but his new friends made him already feel a little comfortable and he feels if he spends more time with them he would be a part of them.Well he still does have some secrets but those are for some other time
MJ was a straightforward just like him,Ned even though very nerdy was a good guy and Peter.......very cute.The smaller boy with his soft curl was making his first day very good
“Hey guys,let me just keep me stuff in the locker and we are good to go.Can’t wait to see some good stuff along with Peter” [Y/N] says to his friend before giving a smile towards Peter who blush at this
[Y/N] slowly walked to his locker and entered the code as he heard whispers all around him of students who were surprised to see [Y/N] the new “Bad Boy” of the school being friends with the supposed loser group
[Y/N] just rolls his eyes and thinks “These blabber mouths only like to gossip and do nothing else” before turning to go back to the group
But when he returned he raised his eyes to see some guys surrounding his new friends and more specifically Peter as the other students ignored this thing like it wasn’t anything new making a frown of annoyance come to his face
“Yo Penis,what the hell is happening between your loser group and [Y/N],huh?!Don’t tell me you infected him with your nerdiness.He should be with our interesting group instead of you losers” Flash said with a smirk while his lackeys laughed behind him but MJ said to this with an annoyed look “But well then he didn’t even talked or sat with you guys till now once”
“He didn’t earlier cause he didn’t knew how cool I’m compared to you all,he would eagerly come to me” Flash said with a knowing smirk as if he was [Y/N] mother making the said boy even more annoyed
But then Peter whispers “The only thing he would notice on you is your is your empty brain” but unluckily Flash hears it and grabs Peter from his collar before saying “WHAT did you say Penis?!”
Peter thought he was gonna be hit but something happened in a very fast moment.One second Flash was holding Peter and the next second Flash was slammed into the lockers by [Y/N]
A heavy silence fell in the hallway as everyone started to understand what happened while Flash himself was finally coming in terms with his situation
“You are Flash or Eugene Thompson,right?Let me get some stuff very straight alright?” [Y/N] said a very dangerously low voice while his eyes became very cold to which Peter shivered a little as he looked at this exchange awestruck along with MJ and Ned
Flash nodded as he tried his best to not shake at [Y/N] coldness so [Y/N] continued “As I said before I make my friends myself so don’t go around blabbering whatever shit you want okay?I don’t like when people start spreading any kind of lies about me around.Second,I willing went to their table cause I didn’t wanted to deal anymore overly fucking friendly people which includes as well,so stop saying shit about these guys”
“H-how can y-you defend these lo-losers?!” Flash finally said after getting some courage but immediately shut up when [Y/N] gave him a deadly glare
“I like them specially Peter cause he or them are not a bratty scaredy cat shitty mouth with no brains who only like to flaunt his family power to do stupid stuff or bride the school to keep yourself out of trouble due to your trashy antics” [Y/N] spatted as Flash’s face just felt open while everyone else were very shocked how openly you said that,Ned was like he was seeing some unreal stuff,MJ was smirking like crazy and Peter just saw you becoming more cool with every word you said
“And if you come near my friends or Peter to bully,be prepared” [Y/N] said and immediately Flash jolted as he saw the Asian boy punch the locker just inches beside his face leaving a big dent on it making the almost shaking Flash shake very violently out of fear
The moment [Y/N] pulled away from Flash a voice shouted “WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!” and low behold it’s the principal walking towards the two boys through the crowd of students
“You said about my family,right?Just watch and see how I make you get in trouble now after all that” Flash whispers to [Y/N] but before Flash could say anything he was dumbfounded to see the principal widen his eyes in the sight of [Y/N] and immediately speak to the Asian boy in the most polite voice “O-oh hello,Mr.[L/N].I thought it was some kind of trouble but it seems just you and your friends”
“Oh no sir actually it seemed Thompson here had a lot of thing to say to my friend so I just talked him down to his place but I hope you can have a talk with him about it as well as my father wouldn’t be happy after listening to the fact that such a boy was left without being anything by any of the teacher of the school.And please don’t mind about that locker,I kind of hit it in impulse but my father would pay for it back soon” [Y/N] says with smile while tilting his head to the side
“O-Oh of course!!I would make sure Mr.Thompson doesn’t repeat this again.MR.THOMPSON OF TO MY OFFICE RIGHT NOW” the principal said with a polite smile towards [Y/N] before shouting towards Flash who was still dumbfounded about the situation
“Wait sir,I have to say something to him” the principal stops with Flash and looks at [Y/N] who moves closer to Flash before whispering to his ears “I forgot to tell you that my father is a billionaire just like Tony Stark but the only difference is that we keep quite about it and since you were gonna include your father here I decided to add mine as well.Let’s have some great years in the school,shitty brat” making Flash look at [Y/N] who was smirking with a pale face
[Y/N] turned around and sling a arm around Peter’s shoulder before he started walking towards the entrance along with MJ and Ned who were following him quietly while students made way for the group
“OMG mate,THAT WAS SO SICK!!” Ned said with a shout and MJ chuckled before saying “Damn and pretty savage,I just recorded that whole thing in my phone”
“Thanks Ned and you have to gonna send me that video MJ” [Y/N] says and looks at Peter who was blushing for some reason.might be for the hand around his shoulder or the thing which the Asian boy just did for him,[Y/N] didn’t knew
But then Peter said “Thanks for back there,[Y/N]” making a smile come to the Asian boy’s face before got close to Peter’s ears and whispered to them “No problem,I don’t mind showing a jerk his place if it’s for someone as cute as you”
And oh boy,it seemed like Peter was gonna burst in fire
»»————>❃<————««   
Hello everyone!!This is my first thing I’m gonna post in Tumblr and also the first series I’m gonna do here.I would later on take request as well but not now as I’m very busy to study for an important exam.But I would take request from next year so in the mean time I would be doing this series which I’m very excited to do.I hope you all enjoyed it
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danielxricciardo · 4 years ago
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Original prompt list
1. "Hi, my ex just walked in. Would you hold my hand please?"
2. "I didn't expect to see you here."
3. "Have you seen this dog?"
4. “That mouth of yours, does it ever stop making noise”
5. “Seven minutes in heaven is for virgin teenagers”
6. “Slam that door one more time and I’ll shove my foot straight up your cute ass”
7. “Jesus! Knock next time would you”
8. “You have money go and get yourself a hoodie that’s not mine”
9. "I hate roses, I thought you knew"
10. "Do you think I am an angel? Ha"
11. "I wanted to sleep but someone decided to die"
12. "I can kill you right now, what are you talking about?"
13. "Hi, I am lost, can you come after me?"
14. "When I first saw you I wanted to date your best friend"
15. "I am so funny and you are just jealous"
16. "If I have to choose... no"
17. "Stop breathing like that!"
18. "I just did my nails"
19. "I'm the best driver în the world"
20. "Will you marry me?" "No"
21. "I think I broke my arm" "So?"
22. "I think I love you" "Thanks"
23. "My arms are lonely, don't you think?"
24. "Apparently we are dating"
25. “Well it’s kind of hard to move when you’re sitting on my lap”
26. "Those things you said yesterday, did you mean them?"
27. "If we elope, you think they'll kill us?"
28. "This is yours"
29. "You can’t just kiss me, laugh and then walk away."
30. "Are you using ass as a pillow?"
31." I find your lack of faith disturbing."
32. "And I took it personally"
33. "In here I am the boss"
34. "Oh, bite me!" "Where?"
35. "What will you do if we break up?"
36. "Where is my T-shit?"
37. "This is no time for sarcastic comments." "There is always time for sarcastic comments."
38. "I’ll keep quiet, you won’t even know I’m here."
39. "The way you flirt is just awful"
40. "Don’t be fooled. I’m the epitome of mess."
41. " If you are on TV should I congratulate you?"
42. "And this, is why we can’t have nice things."
43. "That's what he said"
44. "I am scared of your boss"
45. "You should know, a lot of girls have a crush on me"
46. "Everyone is afraid of you"
47. "If I'm watching that movie one more time I'll lose my fucking mind!"
48. "I thought being on vacation will be stress free"
49. "My parents don't trust you"
50. "I don't think I should give my last name so easily"
51. “I really wish I could unsee that.”
52. “Who would’ve guessed we’d be sharing a room.”
53. “I feel like you have an unhealthy obsession with me.”
54. “Nah he’s fine, it’s the other one you really got to watch out for.”
55. “I have a suggestion.” “I’m not taking my clothes off so forget it.”
56. “You’re the genius, why don’t you tell me?”
57. “Have I ever told you your accent makes me swoon?” “Really?” “No.” He/she smiles. “ that’s why I’ve never told you.”
58. “I’m alive? How am I still alive?”
59. “You’re crazy! I love it!”
60. “Never have I ever is about to get a lot more interesting.”
61. “What did they do?” “Dude. They did the do.”
62. "You can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, cause guess what? It did!"
63. "Well this is awkward."
64. "Im too sober for this."
65. "Im pregnant." "Wall done, Virgin Mary!"
66. " I want to protect you."
67. "Kill that spider and maybe I'll forgive you"
68. "I have no one to go to the wedding"
69. "Don’t you dare touch _______!"
70. "I thought you were dead!"
71. "This is, without a doubt, the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in."
72. "Take care of you, please"
73. "If your best friend single?"
74. "Just remember, if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English."
75. "Why does everyone assume we're a couple?"
76. "Im craving something sweet" "Are you pregnant or something?"
77. " What is the magic word?" "I'll kill you în your sleep"
78. "When I see you my knees get weak"
79. "Finally you're single. Can I take you on a date?"
80. " So, I guess you don’t do after hours?"
81. "I know what I'm doing, I've watched two whole seasons of Grey's Anatomy."
82. "I can't believe I'm stuck here with you right now."
83. "Okay, this did not go as I planned it in the shower."
84. "I'm not going to sit around and watch you destroy yourself."
85. "You were my best friend"
86. "You did what?"
87. "Can you just pretend to love me for a second!"
88. "You are enough"
89. "Take the shirt off"
90. "Your nickname is bitch"
91. "What do you want to watch?" "You"
92. "How could you ask me that?"
93. "Your mouth does this thing and I can't resist it"
94. "Are you allowed to drink?"
95. "I said Im done, leave me alone!"
96. "Don’t raise your fucking voice at me”
97. “Yeah, I remember the drill”
98. “Tell me again, slowly this time, why that dog is in my bed.”
99. “Gave you so much, but it wasn’t enough.”
100. “You and me, we were destined to fall apart.”
101. “No, you don’t know who you are until somebody breaks your heart.”
102. “I want to tell you everything. The words I never got to say the first time around.”
103. “It’s better to feel pain, than nothing at all.”
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onthecrosslook · 3 years ago
Text
Three Acts
Note: @call-me-moo Here goes nothing…
Epilogue
(From this point onward, the chapters will not be illustrated. I attempted to illustrate them, but it diverges from canon so much that I couldn’t find a single scene that worked. I’m really sorry about it. But still, I hope you enjoy the epilogue…and whatever that entails.)
I’m in a wheelchair at Mary’s funeral. The doctors told John I was too weak to leave the hospital, but I insisted on going. Their concerns were warranted, after all- the last time I left, I nearly bled out in an abandoned building. But having my best friend…
Perhaps maybe more…?
I shake the thought away.
I can’t ruin this.
Being with John is the least I can do, and the most I could ever ask for.
I don’t deserve him.
Everyone that was there to pay their respects have already left- not that many people came to begin with. Most washed their hands of the whole situation when they found out who Mary truly was, and what she had done to us. Only John and I stayed afterwards.
Together. Once again, together.
We remain at the grave, respectively sitting and standing in companionable silence. Neither of us are sure what to say- to each other, or to Mary, I’m not sure. It’s fairly overcast, and I can see the beginnings of storm clouds rolling in above us.
How appropriate.
I exhale and tentatively steal a glance at John. He looks calm, but I can see a range of emotions flashing in his blue eyes as he stares at Mary’s gravestone. One of his hands is balled into a shaking fist, and the other loosely holds a bouquet of white lilies.
“Sherlock,” he murmurs, his voice cracking with emotion and painful, unsaid words. “Sherlock, what…what am I supposed to say…?”
He killed his wife.
I swallow hard. I’m not sure what to say, either, but anything I could do…“Do…would you like me to speak first?”
He killed his wife for me.
John nods stiffly and stands back, before hesitating and pushing my chair a bit closer. He looks as though he wants to say something to me, but he bites back the words and keeps them to himself.
I take a deep, shaky breath. “…Mary. I…I…want you to know that…Even if- if you shot me. Even if you…with Rosie…Even after all that, I- I think…I forgive you. You were selfish. And you- you lied, and you hurt everyone. But…you were also kind. And you were selfless, sometimes. And I saw some of the love you had f-for everyone, even if you don’t want to admit it.”
Where is this coming from? I hated Mary, I hated her, I really did, I hated her smile and her words and her subtle manipulation throughout the entirety of our fabricated friendship-
“Sherlock…” John says softly, urging me to stop getting lost in my mind. It’s funny how he can do that with a single look…
I can’t stop. Not now.
“-And…and I know I should be…the last person who tells you about love, because…because I’ve only truly…truly known what it meant after meeting John.” I don’t look at John. I’m too afraid of how he’ll react. “And…and you. I don’t…believe in the afterlife, you’re aware. But…I- I hope…” I feel hot tears burning my eyes. “I hope you’re at peace, Mary.”
John rests a hand on my shoulder as I choke back tears. I flinch at the sudden contact. He doesn’t say anything further as I take deep breaths to regain my composure.
I shouldn’t be this emotional. I shouldn’t care.
“Sherlock,” he repeats again, the barest trace of a smile on his face. “How- how do I compete with that?”
I laugh and lean into his touch. It feels warm, comforting, loving.
It feels right.
I smile weakly back at him. “Just say what's on your mind. You’ll be all right.” And I mean it. He will be all right.
He sighs and walks forward. A moment passes before he finally builds up the courage to begin speaking- and once he starts, it all rushes out of him like an unblockaded river. “Mary. You were my wife. Once. And…and yes, I shot you. But you shot Sherlock, so I think we’re even. You were a liar. And a killer. But I suppose that’s my type, yeah? I can’t help going for the crazy ones. It’s…it’s my addiction.” He glances towards me, pain in his eyes, before looking back. “I just…I don’t think I could forgive you, normally. But…if…if Sherlock could- if my favourite bloody sociopath could find it in his heart to…I…I think I can, too. Goodbye, Mary. I think I’ll be happier now.”
He deserves it. John Watson has been through far too much heartache, he deserves to have a bit of happiness.
“John, are you all right?”
His expression lightens a bit, as though he’s gotten a lot off of his chest.
I suppose, in a way, he has. Catharsis can be a wonderful thing.
“Yeah, Sherlock. I’m all right. For the first time…in…in a while. Come on. I’ve got to finish moving my stuff back to Baker Street, and I’ll be damned if you use being shot as an excuse not to help.”
I smile softly. “No excuses?”
“None,” he agrees, before leaning down and pressing a chaste kiss against my lips. “I think we’ve been making excuses for far too long.”
I know we have. Things will be different, at first. It’ll take a bit of getting used to. But I think we can do it.
Sherlock Holmes…and John Watson.
¿?MThIeSS?MEnd¿???
“R, sweetheart, do you have eyes on Sherlock Holmes?” A smooth voice- just like honey- creeps into R’s ear like a particularly cunning virus.
R swallows bitterly as her lips curl into a snarl. “Yes, sir. He’s at the grave,” she growls, her American accent feeling much more natural than the British one she had been faking for so many years.
“Excellent,” the voice says, which isn’t the most original comment, considering how many criminal masterminds have said ‘excellent’ in regards to evil plans before. “Ugh, isn’t he boring?”
“Who?” R asks reluctantly.
“John. So plain, so obviously in love- oh, I think he finally kissed his little boytoy! Bravo, John, it only took you five years!” The voice is taunting, emanating energy as though it would never again have a chance to play. “I’m sorry, that’s a bit of a sore spot, isn’t it?”
“Of course not, sir,” R says curtly, ignoring the previous musings. “Would you like me to eliminate them?”
“No, no, no!” the voice shouts viciously, making R flinch. “Don’t you dare touch a single curl on that pretty thing’s head! I want Sherlock to recover and be healthy for our next round.” He says ‘round’ as though it’s such an intimate thing- it’s altogether rather surreal.
As much as R would like to put a bullet in each of their heads, she controls her impulses. God knows what he would do to her if she did. “Yes, sir.”
The voice groans. “Stop with the formalities, Mary. It’s so dull, and you of all people should know how much I despise dull people.” He lowers his tone to something dark and deathly soft. “Refer to me as ‘sir’ one more time, and I will string your bloody corpse up in Regent’s Park for the birds to have at you.”
Mary swallows, her gun shaking violently from her sniper’s post. “With all due respect, Mr. Moriarty, Mary is no longer my name,” she whispers.
“Ah, well, it suits you!” Moriarty exclaims over the comms, his voice back to its regular gusto. “Head back to the car, Mary. We need to discuss your punishment.”
Mary pales. “Punishment, Mr. Moriarty? But- I haven’t-“
He laughs. It sends shivers up her spine. “Mary, Mary, quite the contrary,” he quips. “You nearly killed my favourite pet. Shooting him near the heart- tsk, tsk, I expected better of you. The little joke about saying ‘hi’ to me was clever, too, but I can’t have this go unnoticed. We’re both professionals, I’m sure you understand!”
“But-“
Moriarty interrupts her with a shout. “BUT I suppose I’ll be lenient, just this once.” He seems to be barely holding back deranged giggles. “Instead of taking your hand, I’ll settle for a finger. Off you pop!”
The line cuts off abruptly as Mary feels a needle plunge into her neck, and she suddenly wishes she hadn’t worn a bulletproof vest when confronting Sherlock…
~
(To Be Continued!)
Act One linked below:
https://benaddicted-linfanuel.tumblr.com/post/656892650818011136/three-acts
Act Two linked below:
https://benaddicted-linfanuel.tumblr.com/post/656968775195934720/three-acts
Act Three linked below:
https://benaddicted-linfanuel.tumblr.com/post/656990419321864192/three-acts
Act Four linked below:
https://benaddicted-linfanuel.tumblr.com/post/657145687996301312/three-acts
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kawaiijellymonster · 3 years ago
Text
I have thoughts that everyone is gonna hate but this is my blog so I can say whatever I want and you have to deal with it.
Basically I watched the 2016 suicide squad movie the other day bc the new one came out and I realized I had never watched it, it was then i realized that's where the Jared Leto joker came from. Ive been thinking about the movie a lot because it seems like a lot of people really didn't like that movie, probably bc it's a bit of a mess but I think it's okay.
These thoughts are a mess too but thats fine, basically I'm trying to get at two things, the first is that I find the first movie more dramatic and compelling. Part of this is just that the atmosphere of the first movie is a lot darker whereas the second one relied a lot on heavy dramatic cgi gore for its darker moments. The other part is the relationship between Harley and the joker. We all know it's bad and psychotic and wrong, but it's also interesting. for every bold daring shitty thing joker did Harley followed it up with her own crazy shit, it's basically the ao3 tag "consensual but not safe or sane". Someone said that there's a difference between romance in a literary sense and romance in reality, that in literature, "romance" is about writing the id in its simplest most grandiose form, it means "this is beautiful, this is tragic, this is grotesque, this stirs emotion". That literary romance isn't something you would feel comfortable seeing in your everyday life. The Oscar Wilde quote "I didn't say I liked it, I said it fascinated me, and there is a great difference" really embodies this idea. No, their relationship wasn't good, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, but it was evocative and dramatic so I appreciated it.
Secondly, everyone hates the Jared Leto Joker. And I kind of get it, he isn't a psychotic clown, which isn't true to the "joker" character. 's tracker. But at the same time, batman didn't show up a single time except because of Deadshot which is also very out of character. This movie wasn't about joker, it wasn't about him being himself, it was about his relationship with harley.
Yes, he acted more like a mob boss, looking for power and money instead of just being batshit and dosing everyone on joker gas or fucking around with batman. But in this movie, Harley was center stage. He needed money and influence and power in order to do the majority of the things he did later on; pay off debts to get the guard to pass Harley the phone, break into the lab, have enough cronies to break into the lab, and then get to the city to disable Harley. The original joker didn't play well with others, often it was just him and Harley and maybe a couple of goons, but that joker wouldn't have been able to pull off this kind of prison break. This movie needed a joker with infectious psychotic charisma, absolutely batshit but willing to work with others, play by the rules a little to get what he, and more importantly, Harley, wanted. And even though none of those came into play until later if they only had him build power and influence after she was captured he would be building from the ground up, it made for a much more cohesive character to be more mob-bossy from the start than to 180 halfway through, and if he did who's to say Harley would still be in love with a much different joker? No, he isn't the original joker, but he is the one that Harley needed.
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letoscrawls · 4 years ago
Note
What are your Extremely Italian Opinions? Anything from politics to pasta, drop some hot takes
mmmmm good question! even though i'm not a proud italian as i'm very critical of this country and i'd love to live abroad in the future, i do have typical italian opinions that i'm ready to die for. I’m sure these will be mainly about food, but let’s see:
-say whatever you want, but italian food is the best food in the entire world, not only it’s healthy but it’s also delicious and no nation can compare :) no you can’t change my mind :) every time i watch Ratatouille i cringe so bad at the beginning when they say that French cuisine is known to be the best in the world??? that’s so false and i don’t even find it funny, we italians take food so seriously and if you dare criticize something about our food we take it very personal, yes, IT IS THAT DEEP.
-idk if it's a take but i find it funny that we don't use ice that much?? like i was so shocked to learn that smoothies are made WITH ICE?? we almost never use it, we definitely don't put it in coffee and we have this strange belief that ice gives you stomachache, especially if you want to take a bath, we usually wait two or three hours before taking a bath after a meal, especially if there's ice in it somewhere lol i think it's a typical Italian Grandma Advice but we all follow it religiously. Even though i know it's bizarre i can't help but wait at least two hours after my meal before having any kind of contact with water
-No one dubs movies and cartoons like italians. Our voice actors are superior (but the italian Rebels dub is terrible, don’t watch Rebels in italian, everyone sounds very bad except for Thrawn, surprisingly his voice better than the original and i've already talked about this in my ig stories some time ago haha) and i often watch shows and movies in italian even tho it's "trendy" nowadays to watch everything in english. Tbh i think that  a country with a strong tradition of voice acting shouldn't neglect it in favor of the original language, just because something was made in english it doesn't make it better. For example, the prequel trilogy is insanely better in italian, while i love Hayden's performance as Anakin i think that sometimes...it lacks emotion? the italian dub makes up for those parts, i couldn't understand why international fans used to despise the PT so much at first, especially the acting. There isn't one single character in the prequels that sounds bad, really. Same thing goes for Disney classics, i find them 100% funnier in italian (the most memorable example is Emperor's New Groove, the main characters are voiced by some of the funniest comedians we have, they all did an amazing job), even tho some characters are voiced by celebrities who don't do voice acting on a regular basis the result is always phenomenal. Honorable mention to the Genie in Aladdin who is voiced by Gigi Proietti, an actor and comedian of immesurable talent who passed away a few days ago, his performance is on the same level of Robin Williams' imo. So yeah, i'm a huge fan of italian voice acting in case you didn't notice
-regarding politics, lots of people here say that we have the "best democracy in the world" or something like that.........eh, i highly doubt it. I hate this country because there is no meritocracy, you're most likely to succeed if you have good connections or a powerful family. The worst part is that this applies to EVERYTHING and it's terrible. Also there's a big imbalance between North Italy and South Italy, so it's hard to succeed and have access to a good education if you're born in the South and you're poor. And it's a shame. I was lucky enough to live near a very good university so i pay for taxes and nothing else, but only those who are born in wealthy families in the south can afford university in the north as universities in the south are not that good in general. it's really a shame bc south italy is freaking beautiful but the government doesn't spend the same amount of time, energy and money and that's also one of the reasons crime rates are so high there. truly every single issue in Italy could be resolved by funding our education system but most politicians don't give a flying fuck about it and it shows :/
-University in italy is considered a privilege, something that people do because they are too lazy to go to work and get "a real job". we have one of the lowest rates of student getting a degree in europe and yet a lot of people are expected to be jobless for years after graduating uni. it's crazy. there is no respect or consideration for university students since you're not obliged by law to attend one but it's your choice. university professors are terrible, they act like we don't have a personal life and in most cases will make everything so hard that you'll need to take an exam even 15 times before passing it. a friend of mine who is a prodigy in Math attended a really good university in Switzerland and he told me that you can take exams a max of 3 times there but you usually don't need to because they are much easier to pass?? also exams are so hard to pass, my degree is a living hell, you have to take multiple tests, do projects and assignments to pass one freaking exam, while the entire world has the paper system, so you basically write a paper and then the teacher grades it and guess what??? YOU LEARN STUFF ANYWAY. i hate that university in italy takes so much years, tears and mental energy to finish and this leads me to my next point
-healthcare. Italy has one of the best healthcare systems in the world because, well, it's free! You have some kind of bills to pay, but they are not as expensive as in the US, the country got a huge debt at some point in the 60s/70s (i guess??) to afford free healthcare but it was really worth it!! HOWEVER, i think it's pointless to have free healthcare for literally anything besides mental health. sadly, mental health is a tough topic here, if you suffer from a mental illness you're considered crazy, an attention seeker, incapable of being a normal citizen and stuff like that. therapists are super expensive and only wealthy people can afford them. personally, i can't afford one and i would love to since i suffer from anxiety and maybe other things (but i guess i'll never know since my country doesn't give a fuck lmao). and university students are most likely to have mental health issues due to the terrible conditions we live in, yet society ignores us, this results in very high suicide rates among students in their twenties. i honestly hate it so fucking much, especially because studying psychology is considered "easy" and you'll probably be jobless after your degree. psychologists are doctors, they deserve to be paid like any other doctor because they save lives, for real.
So uhm this was supposed to be funny but ended being very critical hahahaha
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thedramaclubs · 4 years ago
Text
Zazz
Summery: shits going down after prom and if you’ve seen the musical/movie be prepared for a gay panic from Patton
Warning: does get a little heated with one of the ships, and of course homophobia in the beginning
Ships: Logicality, Prinxiety, demus/dukeceit
When singing
Janus-orange (tumblr doesn’t have yellow)
Patton-blue
Both- purple
A few days after prom and things are going crazy. On Monday after school the news went to James Madison high to interview the school and Mrs Greene about what happened. Mrs Greene was now being interviewed.
“I’ve been told to say something. The courts said that Patton would not be safe if we allows him to attend prom with the other students because the uncomfortable truth is there are some people in our community that are offended by his life choices. We thought this arrangement was the only course of action.”
Suddenly news reports ask so many questions
“Mrs Greene are you homophobic?” “Are you saying sexuality is a life choice?” Then she exclaimed “ This is uncomfortable for me! To be infront of a camera like this. To read horrible things about my town. And I am just a mother. I am not any kind of a spokes person and I love all the students at James Madison high as much as my own son.” She walks up to Logan who was watching his mom being interviewed. “We are in this situation because of a group of people, privilege people from New York!”
She sighed
“They are the villains. You should be writing about them not us.”
Back at Patton’s house he and Janus we’re watching the interview on his computer. Patton had been in his room for days hiding from it all. He wore his cat onesie that Logan got for him on their 1 year anniversary of being together. He wore it because he wanted to feel like Logan was giving him a hug and he wanted to feel like Logan was their with him.
“Ugh that women totally doesn’t make my skin crawl!”
“I can’t wrap my head around all this. This is a nightmare. I’ve never been so alone in my life.” Patton started to cry a little. Janus pulled him into a hug.
“Your not alone you have friends.”
“Yeah, well where are they?” At that moment, Remus, Thomas, Joan, and Roman came in.
“Hey, we brought Haagen dazs.”
“It’s fancy ice cream.” Thomas Said as he had the bag
“I know what Hagen dazs is hand it over.” Patton grabbed the bag out of Thomas’s hands and Remus sat on the bed next to Pat.
“Are you Okay?”
“I’m amazing, the whole world is talking, making it sound like I’m the one responsible for it but no one is talking the hate there’s just so much hate. There’s so much hate.........I’m gonna need more of this shit.” Patton got the ice cream open and started eating his cookies and cream. Remus then started talking.
“Listen I know you said you don’t want our help anymore but we can’t let them get away with this. That pta women who the hell does she think she is?! I want her to get run over by a bus!!!”
“She’s a monster that’s what!”
Remus inhaled to calm down “Joan what can we do?”
“I don’t know. She’s spun this whole thing herself to make her look like the victim she’s good if she didn’t shop at dress barn she could work in P.R.”
Roman was just standing in the corner but felt like he should say something and so he did.
“I know everybody’s angry but we have to face the facts. We made matters worse. So the best thing we can do is disinfect our things and go home.”
Everyone said at the same time “NO WE ARE NOT LEAVING!!”
“We are always not leaving!! Please I want to leave this horrible place”
“No we are staying here we gotta turn this thing around. We gotta take back the press!”
“But how darling?” Said Janus as he was still on the bed.
“Patton you gotta be the face of this story you gotta go on tv and show the real asshole is!”
“And that will give him a prom?”
“This isn’t about prom anymore. This is about right and wrong you know what you have to do this right.
“I don’t know what I know.” Patton continue eating the ice cream.
“We need a national audience....what about Jimmy Fallon?”
“I can’t just pop Jimmy Fallon out of my ass!!” Exclaimed Joan. “If we want an audience we gotta go big and to to go big we have to use that one call to Eddie Sharp!” Everyone was in agreement except for Roman “No I am not calling that basterd!!”
“Just ask for a favor!”
“If I ask him for something he will want something in return and what he will want is the hamptons house. He trying to get it for years. DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY DISNEY AND BROADWAY CRUISES I HAD TO PAY FOR THAT HOUSE!!!!! I would rather pluck my eyes out and put them in a vacuum and call that even!”
“If that will work just pluck your eyes out then!! *sigh* Joan just get the boy on tv. I don’t care if it’s a cut on family guy just do your magic.”
“Aye aye.” Joan left to try and get Patton on TV
“This is great.” Patton then decide to say something
“No not great. I’m sorry but their is no way I’m getting in front of a camera and telling my story. I cannot do that just no. Just accept it we lost deal with it.” Patton went to a corner and stood with his arms cross. Then Thomas came up with and idea.
“Ya know there might be a better way to rid of this community by extension of nation of this cancer of intolerance!” Everyone was dead silent
Eventually Remus asked “Why are you still here? I thought you had a tour?”
“Indianapolis was canceled and so was everywhere else. But I’m thinking feature forth and seek out the younger people and rap in a non musical sense. And soon understanding could lead to, dare I say it......love.” Thomas left and now there was Roman, Remus, Janus and Patton.
Patton turned around to see their faces and Remus broke the silence again “Listen kitty cat, I know this is hard but if you don’t do something, they will.”
At that moment Janus got an idea. “Don’t worry he’s got stage fright. I’ll talk to the kid.” Roman had already walked out leaving Remus and Janus outside the door.
“Are you sure about this Jannie?” Janus put his hand on Remus’s check and kissed him.
“Of course darling.” Said Janus very seductively. Remus couldn’t help himself he had been touch starved so and picked up Janus and pinned him against the wall.
“Damn why are you so hot?!” Remus passionately kiss the smaller man as Janus put his hands on Remus’s face pulling him in closer. Sadly, it came to an end because their was a another short man waiting for Remus.
“REMUS CMON!!” Remus put his husband down and gave him one last kiss “See you tonight Jan.” Remus left leaving him and Patton alone.
“You two really love each other huh?”
“Yeah I love him so much. He may be an idiot sometimes but, he’s my idiot.” Patton laughed a little then got back on track.
“Now before you lecture me or....kick me to death with those crazy Anatlope legs.....or whatever it is your gonna do, I know I should do something. I just can’t.” Janus walked back to the bed.
“Look kid, not everyone gets a chance to step out of the chorus. You gotta do this for all the those people who used to be gypsies.”
“I’m too scared.” He hid in the cat hoodie and Janus got an idea.
“Let me tell you a story. 1975 and the original company of “Chicago” was in previews. Suddenly the worst outbreak in history hit the cast and their down to the third cover for Roxie Heart and he’s scared just like you.” Patton took the hood off of his head to listen to the rest of the story.
“So, fosse was a real ball buster puttin him through a pain an he’s petrified. Even worse he’s performing the routine like a robot. So the boss pulls him aside and says “hey kid, snap out of it. You got the steps, you got the notes, but where’s the Zazz baby.”And although he had never heard that word before he knew exactly what it meant and he crushed that performance. The audience screaming bloody murdur.”
“And that boy was you?” Janus gave him a blank stare
“Yes it was me how fucking old fo you think I am!? It was 1975. But the point is every fosse boy knows that story. All about finding your inner strength.”
When a challenge lies ahead and you are filled with dread and worry
Give it some zazz
If your courage dissapers what’ll get you fears to scurry
Give it some zazz
Zazz is style plus confidence, it may seem corny or kitsch
But when scared or on the fence you’ll find that zazz will soon make fear become your bitch
And if folks say you can’t win what’ll will stop them in a hurry
Janus layed on the bed and kicked his leg up high that gave Patton a gay panic
Give it some zazz
There’s no contest for a boy who has some razzmatazz
So call their bluff
And strut your stuff
Like no chick in this hick town has
Instead of giving up
Give it some zazz
“I just don’t think I can do it. The thought of getting in front of all those people look at my hands their shaking”
“If your hands are shaking....”
Just turn’m into jazz hands
“Doesn’t that feel better?”
“No”
“Try this. Close your eyes.” Patton stood up and closed his eyes
“Zazz doesn’t just come out, it comes from within. Now think about Mrs Greene.” Patton put his hand across his face.
“Think about that fake prom!” He took his other hand and did jazz hands.
“Now think of finally doing something about it!” Patton started doing moves and it filled him and Janus with joy.
“Oh I’m seeing it! I’m seeing your Zazz! Now follow me!”
Do like the brave and bossy do
And if they tear you apart
Ask what would Bob Fosse do?
He’d make the people have a step ball change of heart
Ball change!!!
And if folks say you can’t win what’ll stop them in a hurry
Give it some zazz!!
There’s no contest for a boys who has some razzmatazz
So call their bluff BAM!
And strut my stuff BAM!
Like no chick in this hick town has
Instead of giving up
Give it some zazz
Now that you’ve found your zazz it’s time to show it to the world. You think you know how?
YEAH!!
People to tag @artissi-jam @patt-off @frogsandcookies @icantthinkofacreativeurl @actingonimpulse @purplestarrystars
I’m back!!!!
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Dannymay Day 01 - Comforting Eyes
I haven’t posted any of my writing, fanfiction or original, in weeks, and yet here we are with a Savant Par drabble for the event of Dannymay on May 1st (Pacific Time). 
You’re welcome.
                                                           ⁂
If Tucker Foley were ever asked to describe his best friend in a few words, he had little to no doubt that he would say the baffling sentence of, “His eyes are blue.” Granted the words did nothing to describe Danny, his character, his struggles, his abilities, or anything at all beyond a small part of his physical looks, but, well. It was always the first thought Tucker had when Danny Fenton was mentioned. His eyes were blue. 
When they had met on the first day of preschool Tucker had been used to brown eyes, hazel eyes, and had even seen red eyes in a movie (which had been the last time his Uncle had  been allowed to babysit him). Tucker had never seen blue eyes before that day, and he had especially never seen eyes that reminded him of the one time he had seen the ocean through the television. 
He also had never seen eyes that were so stubbornly determined to help a kid he had never met because he didn’t like bullies. It wasn’t hard to lie that the two had been friends since preschool since they really had been, straight from the first conversation. 
“Why did you do that?” Tucker had been on the ground, glasses askew, and bruise forming from where he had been shoved to the ground. “Now he’s just gonna hurt you!”
Danny, who had been so small and, in Tucker’s opinion, too stupid to know that other people didn’t just help for no reason, had smiled at him. “That’s okay as long as you won’t be hurt.”
“You’re so weird.” Three words that could also be used to describe Danny if Tucker didn’t have the eye description first. “Wanna play?”
“Uh, do rockets fly to the moon? Of course!” Danny’s eyes had shined like the promise of the ocean that had captivated Tucker. He really didn’t try hard to fight it, though. 
“You know what, Danny? I think we’re gonna be good friends.”
(And they really, really had been. If Danny’s rambles about humans having once been stars were right, then Tucker was pretty sure they were from the same star.)
They were the best of friends. 
Then Danny’s eyes turned green. 
When they were fourteen Tucker’s best friend had died. He still couldn’t - wouldn’t - forget the feeling of his stomach dropping, his heart clenching, and his mind going terrifyingly blank. Considering his ADHD and need to always be thinking and doing something, Tucker had felt like he had died with his best friend. 
Then his friend had stumbled out of the portal with a different colored jumpsuit, snow white hair, and glowing green eyes that had made Tucker afraid. Even when Danny’s form seemed to flicker before he was human again and hitting the floor, Tucker hadn’t been able to move, only vaguely aware of Sam’s screaming and Danny’s unmoving body. 
(If there was one thing he would forever hate himself for, it was standing still instead of rushing to his best friend who could have been dead or dying. He’ll never forgive himself for that one.)
Soon they had learned what had happened and Danny’s eyes started to become green a lot more often. Tucker still remembered when they had first talked about it. 
“My eyes are green? Really?” Danny had sounded so startled and Tucker could hear the fear at the edges of his voice. “I mean, I get the white hair, I guess, but… how green?”
Tucker had managed to force a laugh and a joke. “They’re green, man. I’m talking enchanted frog prince green.” It had made Danny laugh, even if it was just for a moment.
“Alright, alright. How bad do they look?” Danny hadn’t asked if his eyes looked bad. He had asked how bad. “You can be honest with me and I promise if you say anything mean I’ll only cry a little.”
After looking into Danny’s eyes - his new eyes full of swirling green - Tucker didn’t see toxic suffering or hear dying screams like he had the first few times. No. He saw a green shimmer that reminded him of the one time he enjoyed the outdoors - when he had seen sunlight flashing through the leaves of trees that towered over him. “Tucker? I mean- If you’re scared of them you can say that too-”
“They look great.” For the first time since they had met in preschool, Tucker found that green, for just a moment, was a better color than blue. “You look great, Danny.”
Tucker had never forgotten the way his eyes shined as Danny laughed. 
(He had also never forgotten the shy smile and the way his cheeks had flushed for minutes after.)
Although, he was relieved when they went back to blue. 
Blue eyes looked best on him. 
Until his eyes had turned red. 
They all had known that Danny’s emotions affected his powers, especially as they had gotten older and realized just how dangerous that could be. He got angry, his powers reacted. He got sad, his powers reacted. (Although, when he got happy, sometimes his cheeks flushed an icy blue and his hair would start to float.) 
The point was that they had seen Danny’s powers change depending on his emotion, and Tucker had thought he had seen Danny angry. He really had. He knew Danny better than he knew himself, it felt like, so he had known what Danny looked like when he was angry - except he didn’t. (Or, maybe, it was better to say he had never seen Danny in a rage.)
It had been during their third year of high school. A ghost fight had gotten too dangerous and Tucker, powerless Tucker who tried to be good, had gotten in the way. He had heard Danny’s scream before he felt the pain. “Tucker!” 
When the pain did hit Tucker had thought he had been hit in his heart or had his chest disintegrated because that was what the pain felt like. It turned out the attack had just seared his side and some of his chest. He had gotten some pretty nasty burns, but he had been alright. He had said as much, too. “I’m fine- I’m fine, totally fine, just- It’s okay, Danny. I’m okay.” 
Tucker hadn’t even been sure if Danny had been able to hear him, but he remembered how Danny’s powers reacted when his emotions got too crazy. Seeing his best friend hurt (suffering) was probably not a good emotion to have. Tucker remembered trying to reassure him, but he also remembered what Danny had said to the ghost. “You just made a big mistake.”
The words had been deadly. Sharp, cold, and dripping with anger (rage? wrath? hate?) Danny’s words had made Tucker’s world stop. He almost thought he was full out dying before sound returned as he heard Danny scream. His Ghostly Wail had always been impressive, but Tucker forgot just how powerful it could be. He had tried to calm him down even then, though. “Danny- Hey, Danny, I’m okay, man, I’m-”
“Shut up.” Danny’s words had been frantic and fast, his hands putting pressure on where Tucker had probably been bleeding. He had never really asked. “You’re not fucking fine when half your skin smells like it’s melted what the fuck Tucker I told you to-” 
“Your eyes are red.” Four words and it was the clearest Tucker’s memories were of that moment in time. He had seen Danny’s eyes blue, and green, but he had never seen them red. They reminded Tucker of blood. 
“Sorry- I’m sorry, I know- Don’t be scared, okay? I’m- It’s fine. You’re gonna be okay. You can be scared, just- Be okay. You-” 
“I’m not scared.” The red didn’t remind Tucker of blood when he saw the fear and worry that far outweighed the color. “They look good.” They reminded Tucker of fire, bright and burning but so helpful when you knew just what to do and where to step. They reminded Tucker that Danny would always protect him. He could still see Danny’s fear, though, so he had said what he had the first time. “You look great, Danny.” 
Tucker would never forget the clear gratitude and relief shining out of those red eyes, or the tired, relieved laugh that followed. 
(He also never forgot the way those red eyes had caught his attention like Ember’s mind control songs had - utterly, completely, and fully.)
So, sometimes, Danny’s eyes turned red.
It was usually good for them, but bad for whoever Danny was fighting. 
Red meant Danny was serious. 
Gold eyes, though… 
“You’re okay.” Tucker whispered the words into the soft white hair he was pressed again, uncaring of the way his hot breath bounced back into his face. “It’s okay, Danny.” Danny, curled up tightly and pressed between Tucker’s arms and chest, said nothing. For a moment, the only reply was the sharp, bitter cold of his breath that washed over Tucker’s neck and shoulder and made him shiver.
Then Danny choked on a broken laugh and finally mumbled a weak, “No offense, Tuck, but you’re shit at lying.”
“Yeah, you know me. Lying’s too much work for me to ever bother,” Tucker joked, hearing how tight his voice was. He didn’t bother to try and hide it, only holding Danny close. His skin was as cold as his ice powers could be. In the dark night, with his bedroom windows open, it was almost too cold to handle. Tucker didn’t dare to let go.
“I guess that’s one thing I can count on.” Danny’s form seemed to go limp. He hadn’t relaxed, but instead it felt like he had given up. It tore at Tucker worse than his screams years ago. “You never lie to me when it counts, so…”
Danny pushed at Tucker’s chest, pushing himself up. Tucker didn’t let him break out of his grip, holding on stubbornly until Danny gave in with a voiceless laugh. “Okay… Okay.” It was progress of some kind. “So, then…” Danny finally looked up since the first time he had flown through Tucker’s window whispering about Clockwork and Observants and destiny with fear thick enough to make Tucker want to stop breathing. “How do I look?”
There were plenty of changes, of course. His ears were more pointed, his skin was paler, his hair seemed to shine in a way it never had before, and so many other little changes that Tucker felt like his head was spinning. The main one, though, the one that Tucker didn’t dare look away from, was the golden eyes meeting his own. 
Danny kept his gaze, scared as he was, before finally giving a smile that held no joy to it. “Do I look that bad, then?”
And the thing was that Tucker didn’t lie to Danny - not when it mattered, not where it counted, not when it was so important. He had never lied to Danny in circumstances like the ones they were in and he didn’t dare start when it was this moment - a moment that felt like it had been coming for a long time. 
And Tucker knew what Danny would be expecting. He would be looking for the usual, “You look great, Danny.” But Tucker wouldn’t lie. 
So, instead, Tucker cupped Danny’s cheeks with both of his hands, watching as Danny’s eyes widened to show more of that golden color- No. Gold was too weak of a word. 
The color of Danny’s eyes reminded Tucker of waves upon waves of glistening sand, constantly swirling and tumbling over itself. It reminded him of the shimmering desert heat of the sun as it pounded down upon all unprotected skin. It reminded him of the burning winds that he felt pound through his blood - even when he poured water as cold as ice over him. 
They were a color that screamed danger at him the same time it screamed of home and belonging. So Tucker didn’t lie when his hands pressed against Danny’s cheeks softly, his words a quiet secret between the two of them when he finally spoke. 
“You look beautiful, Danny.” And it was true. No matter the eye color, from ocean blue and sun forest green to icy blue and fire red, Danny’s eyes had always been beautiful. 
As far as Tucker was concerned, as far as he would always be concerned, Danny had the same comforting eyes as he always had. 
They just came in different colors. 
(And if Tucker’s whispered secret had led to a few more whispered secrets and the knowledge that Danny kissed with as much force and eagerness as he did everything else, well, there were already plenty of secrets and knowledge shared between them.)
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alirhi · 3 years ago
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jfc FINALLY
Ugh. I have been fighting with my muse to get this done for two months. And I was actually going to stretch it to line up more or less with the movie's timeline, but honestly... I'm just so burnt 😂 So this is what you get.
Title: Monday Chapter: Oneshot Fandom: Monday Rating: R/NC17 (I mean, have you seenthe movie?) Pairing: Mickey/OC Summary: What if, instead of Chloe, Mickey met a woman that night who was actually good for him and whom he was compatible with? WARNINGS: swearing, sex (not explicit; I rarely if ever write smut, but still) Notes: I hate Chloe. Omfg I hate her so much. So I fixed it XD Yes, I literally rewrote the entire movie with a different love interest. Well... most of it lol. I get bored, okay? Lol. Oh, and the girl is actually a character I yanked from one of my original stories lol. I didn't make her up on the spot for this (I'm too lazy for that XD). Tweaking her to fit the setting was kind of a bitch, as she's from a fantasy series, so if she seems kind of Mary Sue-ish...sorry.
“You have a nose for American cheese!”
Mickey rolled his eyes. “Come on, that girl looks insane!”
“What?” Looking surprised, Argyris turned and looked where his friend was pointing, and then laughed. “Not her, you idiot! The ginger-snap over there!”
The girl in question, a lithe, pretty thing with a wild mass of red hair that she constantly shoved impatiently out of her face was dancing alone a few feet away from the angry-looking blonde Mickey had thought he'd been talking about. She was gorgeous, he had to admit.
“Go and talk to her, man!”
He pointed to the turntables in front of him, impatiently reminding Argyris, “No, I'm working!”
“Come on,” the other man taunted, “I know your playlist inside-out! It's the same R&B shit, and then a little bit of disco!”
“It's not R&B, and it's not disco!”
“This song is twenty fuckin' minutes long! Come on!”
“Hey!” Mickey grimaced, hastily yanking his headphones off and setting them down as he was dragged off toward the redhead. “Fuck!”
All puffed up with pride – and way too much to drink – Argyris pushed Mickey when they drew close to the girl, so that he slammed right into her. Laughing, he patted her shoulder, but his mirth was short-lived. She grabbed his hand and twisted his arm up behind his back.
“Put your hands on a girl you don't know again. I dare you.”
Mickey covered his mouth with one hand to hide his laughter as his friend writhed in the deceptively delicate-looking girl's grip.
“Alright, alright! I'm sorry!” Laughing as he was released, Argyris went to put a hand on each of their shoulders, took one look at the girl, and just hung off of Mickey's shoulder, instead. “You're an American... You're an American! You're a man, you're a woman! There you go!”
“Yeah, crazy kismet,” she snapped, rolling her eyes. “Two Americans out of their natural deep-fried, flag-waving habitat at the same time! Imagine!”
Undaunted, the drunk Greek simply shrugged and flounced off with a flippant, “Whatever. Have fun!”
“Sorry about him,” Mickey said immediately, smiling when she turned and smiled at him. At least she didn't seem to be judging him by the company he kept.
“Friend of yours?”
“Argyris? Yeah.” He grinned. “He's kind of an idiot, but he's a good guy.”
She laughed. “I'll take your word for it. Aren't you the DJ? Should you be over here?”
“No,” he admitted with a laugh, “but I'm fine for a few minutes. You wanna dance?”
“I'd love to.”
She was tall, he realized as he spun her around; in the little barely-there heels she was wearing, they stood eye to eye. Clearly drunk, though, she lost her balance every few seconds and crashed into him with a laugh, occasionally giving up on righting herself and just resting her head on his shoulder.
Mickey grimaced as he heard the song beginning to wind down, but the girl hanging off of him only smiled and patted his chest. “Go on! Get back to work. I'll be here when you're done.”
“Any chance I could convince you to come around the other side?” He gave her his most charming grin, and felt a little warm inside when she laughed.
“Why, so you can stare down my top the whole time?”
With a shrug, he admitted, “I've been doing that anyway, so why not?”
“Honesty!” She grinned and kissed his cheek. “I like it. Alright, you gorgeous lech! Get back up there. We'll see what I can do about your view.”
He only made it another hour or so, with the girl coming up to him every few minutes with another drink, and occasionally flashing him from the spot she'd found in front of him. Queuing up enough songs to play through the end of the party, he hopped down off the podium and ran over to her, tugging her close for the kiss he'd been dying for since Argyris had first pulled him over to her. “You wanna get out of here?”
“You sure? What about-”
Mickey shook his head, smiling. “It'll run til they all pass out. No one'll touch my stuff, not here. Come on!”
“Okay, yeah.” She shrugged and laughed, allowing him to pull her through the throng of dancing people and away from the party. “Fuck it. Let's go!”
The next morning, naked, hungover, and covered in sand, they were nudged awake by a police officer while an angry lady yelled about their indecency. The officer waited for them to scramble back into their clothes and then cuffed them both, ushering them into the back of a cruiser.
Despite the situation, Mickey couldn't keep the silly smile off of his face. At least the cops had been kind enough to cuff their hands in front of them, allowing him to hold his out to the girl beside him. “Hi. I'm Mickey.”
She laughed, the realization that they'd never introduced themselves clearly dawning in her bright green eyes. “Beck.”
“Nice to meet you.” He shook her hand, but couldn't hide his slight confusion. “That a first name or a last name?”
“It's short for my first name.” She was still smiling, but there was a dangerous glint in her eyes as she added, “Call me 'Becky' once and I'll be facing real prison time at the end of this ride, and you'll be missing body parts.”
With a slightly nervous laugh, he nodded. “Alright, noted. Beck it is!”
“And, nice to meet you, too.”
There was the briefest of conversations at the police station, the sandy couple signed themselves out, and then Mickey persuaded one of the officers to give them a lift back to the beach.
“You want a ride?”
Beck grinned, one ruddy eyebrow arching up. “I still need to clean up from the 'ride' last night.”
Laughing, Mickey shook his head. “I'll never say 'no' to more of that, but that's not what I meant.”
“I know.” She shrugged, snarky grin turning into an almost bashful smile. “And yeah, I'd love a ride. Thanks.”
He loaned her his helmet and, after getting directions from her, drove her to her hotel. It seemed like that would be the end of it... and he hated that thought. “So, what're you doing tonight?”
“Packing and sleeping,” she told him with a laugh, leaning against the building. “I gotta be on a plane Monday morning, and I hate leaving things to the last minute.”
“You're leaving?”
With a grin and a snarky air kiss, she teased, “Missing me already, lover boy?”
Mickey shrugged, grinning. “Maybe I am. I like you, is that so bad?” He beckoned, and was somewhat surprised when she walked right over to him. Still smiling like a fool, he grabbed her by the waistband of her shorts and pulled her close for a kiss. “Come with me tonight, for a proper sendoff.”
“Come with you where?”
“I'm DJing on an island.” Thumb sliding under her clothes to slide over her hip, he wheedled, “Come on. Come with me.”
“I need to shower. I'm all sandy and sticky from last night.” Beck gave him just long enough to deflate, and then she smirked and nipped his jaw. “Care to join me?”
“Fuck yes!” He was off his moped in a flash, following the laughing redhead as she took his hand and tugged him into the hotel. Giggling like hyenas, the pair made their way up to Beck's room, stopping every few steps for one to yank the other close for another kiss. Mickey was on cloud nine. This girl was fun, she was sassy and wild, and he couldn't get enough.
It seemed she couldn't get enough, either. They'd barely stepped into the shower before Beck was on her knees in front of him, her hand on his ass and his hand tangled in her hair as she sucked him off. He leaned back against the wall, tugging lightly on her hair and shuddering as he felt her moan around him.
“Fuck... oh, fuck, you're good at that! Holy shit... Stop. Stopstopstop!” With a little half-smile at her look of confusion, he tugged her back to her feet and kissed her. “You're fucking amazing. God damn, you are good with that mouth! But that's not what I want.”
Beck grinned, a playful glint in her bright green eyes that made him weak in the knees. “That's not a good idea.”
“Oh, no?” He backed her up against the wall, nuzzling her neck as his hand drifted down between her legs. “Funny... You don't seem to really believe that.”
“I definitely want you to fuck me til I can't move,” she assured him, shaking as she tried desperately not to laugh. “But it's not a good idea-” Her words turned into a startled whimper as Mickey hoisted her up by her thighs and slid into her to the hilt.
“I think it's a great idea,” he purred, biting her shoulder. Then he almost dropped her, and they both cracked up.
“The wall's slippery! This isn't smart.”
“No, it's definitely not smart,” he agreed, turning so that he was holding her up in mid-air instead of bracing her against the wall. “But that doesn't make it not a good idea.”
Beck laughed, clinging to him for dear life. “You're just gonna hold me up?”
“Yep.”
“The whole time?”
“You don't think I can do it?” Mickey grinned, bouncing her a few times just to prove her wrong. “You weight nothing, baby girl. I got this.” She was surprisingly light... but she was also a grown woman almost the same height as him. His pride would never let him admit it aloud, but there was no way he was going to be able to fuck her like this for long.
Just as he was wracking his somewhat foggy brain for a solution, he saw light dawning in Beck's eyes and waited. “Counter!” She nodded toward the sink, and only then did he realize they hadn't even closed the shower curtain, and the bathroom floor was getting soaked. “Put me on the counter.”
“I thought we were supposed to be getting cleaned up.” Even as he teased her, he was carefully stepping out of the tub, blessing her foresight when she grabbed a towel and threw it down just before he set his foot down, and carrying her across the bathroom.
Beck snickered and kissed him. “No point getting clean until we're done getting dirty. Shut up and fuck me.”
“Yes, ma'am!”
A little while later, they stumbled across another logistical issue Mickey hadn't considered.
“You are not putting dirty clothes on a clean body!” Beck insisted, prying his – pretty nasty at this point, he had to admit – clothes from his hands. “That's disgusting!”
“Well, what the fuck else am I supposed to wear? Clearly, I can't just run around naked. We got arrested for that this morning!”
“Pity,” she teased, eyeing him in a way that made him wonder if they were ever actually going to leave her hotel room. “You're the best view in Athens.”
“Maybe they arrested us out of jealousy, then.” Mickey shook his head, though he couldn't help chuckling a little, despite his frustration. “Either way, I'm kinda stuck. It's either be gross, or don't go anywhere.”
“As much as the thought of keeping you trapped here as my sex slave appeals to me...” With another mocking grin, Beck turned and started going through her dresser drawers. “I think I can help you out.”
“I'm not wearing your clothes.”
“They're less flamboyant than what you do wear.”
“They won't fit!”
She tossed him a tee shirt and a pair of cargo shorts that proved him very wrong. They were huge. At his questioning stare, she shrugged.
“I always pack a couple of cute outfits when I travel, and the rest is super baggy; at least three sizes too big. I like to be comfortable.”
“Convenient.” He stared at the shorts in his hands, and then at the belt she handed him a few seconds later. “Am I supposed to wear your underwear, too?”
Beck snorted and walked away, patting his shoulder as she passed him. “I don't wear underwear.”
“Then I guess I kind of am wearing yours.” Even as the joke was tumbling out of his mouth, he knew it was lame, but they still both laughed. Then he glanced at his watch and winced. “Shit, we gotta go.”
“What?”
He waited for the dress she was pulling on to settle into place and then wrapped his arms around her, tugging her back against his chest. “We gotta go. If we don't catch the next ferry, we're gonna be late.”
She flinched. “Okay, two seconds.” The girl moved like lightning. Mystified, Mickey watched as she yanked on a pair of canvas sneakers, grabbed her wallet and cell phone – which she then stuffed in the pockets of the shorts he was wearing – grabbed a hair tie, and ran for the door. In no time, she'd strangled her wild red curls into submission in a low ponytail. They hadn't even reached the elevator yet.
“How did you do that?”
“Do what?”
Handing her his helmet, Mickey shook his head. “I think you got dressed faster than I did! I thought girls always take forever to get ready.”
Laughing, Beck rolled her eyes. As she settled on the back of the moped and tucked her skirt around her legs for decency, she told him, “I spent two years in the jungle with nothing but what I could fit in a backpack. Low maintenance is kinda my thing. The fewer steps to getting ready, the less time it takes.”
“That explains so much.” He stared at her for a moment, and then shook his head and grumbled as he slid into place in front of her and started the moped, “And raises so many more questions!”
“Full disclosure: I will probably answer none of them, as I'm very likely never going to see you again after tonight.”
Well, that was a depressing dose of reality he wasn't ready for. Not one to dwell on things, though, Mickey simply decided to have as much fun as he could with this girl while she was around, and treasure the steamy memories.
They made it to the ferry just in time. Making sure there was no one else around, Mickey smirked and tugged Beck into his lap, one hand sliding up her thigh. He moved slowly, giving her plenty of time to push him away if she wanted; she simply arched an eyebrow at his questioning look and grabbed his wrist, tugging his hand closer.
“Why do you think I'm wearing a dress?”
Fuck, he loved this girl!
They were pretty much attached at the hip the whole day – literally, when they could steal a few minutes alone. While he was DJing, she was dancing like a lunatic, front and center. Those piercing green eyes never strayed from him; he knew, because he couldn't look away from her, either. Once he was free, they danced together for a little while, but it didn't take long for Beck to grow bored and yank him down the beach, away from the party. They found a dark, hidden nook to be alone, spent the night hopelessly wrapped up in each other, and then cuddled as they watched the sun come up.
“Gods, this place is so beautiful!”
Mickey chuckled at the plural, but didn't ask about it. He had a more important question for her: “You really gonna leave all this behind?”
“I have to.” She didn't sound any happier about leaving than he was about letting her leave. “I gotta get home.”
“Where's home?”
“Boston. You?”
He grinned and nudged her. “Athens, baby. Been here seven years!”
“Okay, but where before here?” she prodded with a laugh. “You're obviously not Greek; you don't even speak it!”
“Do you?”
Beck sat up a little straighter, grinning like the Cheshire Cat. “Nai.”
“Showoff.”
“One word is being a showoff?” Beck laughed, shaking her head. “You've been here seven years, and you don't know a single word of the language?”
Mickey scowled, feeling defensive. “Everybody speaks English!”
“Wow.” She wasn't smiling anymore. She actually looked and sounded pretty pissed off. “That is astoundingly arrogant. And completely American, so clearly your obnoxious friend with no boundaries was right; it's not just a funny accent, you actually are American.”
“You're an American, too!”
“By birth,” she snapped, “not by choice. And I fucking hope not by attitude. I don't go stomping around foreign countries with absolutely no respect for their language or customs, expecting everyone around me to cater to my laziness.”
He rolled his eyes, scooting away from her. “Give me a break! Learning another language is hard!”
“Impossible, if you don't even try.”
“Yeah? How many languages do you speak?”
“Fluently?” She held up her hands, ticking each one off on her fingers as she listed them. “English, obviously. Korean, Irish Gaelic, Italian, and German. Passably? Japanese – I can speak it fluently, but I have trouble reading it; the kanji is a nightmare – Greek, Spanish, Portuguese, and Swedish. I can read Latin and Old Norse, and I'm learning Mandarin, but I admit I'm struggling with that one. Mostly for the same reason I can't read Japanese; the writing system.”
Gaping at her, Mickey couldn't formulate a response for a long moment. When his brain finally started working again, all he could think to say was, “Jesus, what the fuck are you, a robot?!”
“I'm an archaeologist,” she told him flatly, still looking irritated. “And I've been traveling since I was seventeen. Been studying at least one language other than English since I was ten. I definitely had an advantage, starting when I still had a little kid's spongy brain, but it's not impossible to learn at any age, if you actually care enough to try.”
“You sound like my ex.” Hoping to distract her from that comment he hadn't meant to make, he hastily asked, “If you love to travel so much, why're you in such a rush to get home?”
Beck sighed, turning to stare out over the water. “I promised my daughter I'd be home in time for her birthday.”
Huh. They had more in common that he'd thought. “You have a kid?”
She nodded. “Two. Two girls.”
“How old?”
“Alice is five,” she murmured, pulling her knees up to her chest and crossing her arms over them. Head pillowed on her arms, she added, “And Madeline's about to turn fourteen.”
“How the hell old are you?!” He hadn't meant to ask so bluntly, but he was so stunned by her daughters' ages that the question just kind of blurted itself out.
Mercifully, Beck laughed a little. “I'm thirty-three. I'll spare you some math – I was nineteen when I had Maddie.”
Mickey shook his head, not sure how to react. In all honesty, she didn't look much older than that now. There was a shadow behind her eyes that he was dying to ask about, but even as thoughtless as he could be, he knew when to just not go there. Instead, he told her softly, “My son is six.”
“What's his name?”
He smiled. As much as the situation with his ex sucked, he loved his son, and thinking about him always brought a little smile to Mickey's face. “Hector.”
The look on Beck's pretty face as she watched him like a hawk made him blush, though he wasn't sure why. There was just something about that direct green gaze that made him feel like she could read his mind. “He's the real reason you don't want to leave Greece, isn't he?” A spot-on guess like that certainly did nothing to dispel the notion.
He nodded. “Yeah. Yep. His mom hates my guts, but I don't care. There's nothing I wouldn't do to stay in his life. I actually, um... I have a room for him, at my place. If she'll ever let me take him, you know, just for a weekend or whatever... His room is ready and waiting for him.”
“All you can do is keep trying. Put in the work, be the best dad you can be, and hope for the best.”
Unsure what to say to that, Mickey changed the subject with an awkward smile. “So... Alice? She blonde, like Alice in Wonderland?”
Beck snorted, shaking her head. “No, she has black hair, like her dad.” She paused and then shook her head again with a bemused smirk on her face. “Actually, both of my girls look like their dads – dark hair, big blue eyes.” Smirk turning into a grin, she nudged him. “Guess I've got a type.”
“'Dads,' huh?” He grinned, too, and nudged her right back. “Plural?”
“You gonna get all judgy on me, now?” Her tone was light and teasing, but her eyes promised a whole lot of pain if he answered wrong.
Mickey just laughed. “Nope, no judgment. I think you've seen enough of what I'm like this weekend to know I wouldn't have the right.”
“Good answer.”
“I don't want you to leave.” He watched her go rigid and sighed, shaking his head. “I'm not gonna try to stop you. If you were leaving for literally any other reason, I might, but I'd never dream of trying to keep a mom away from her kid. I just... I really like you, and I wish you didn't have to go.”
She shrugged a little, staring out over the water again. “To be honest, I don't wanna go, either. I mean, I'm dying to see my girls again, being away from them is always painful, but... This place is so beautiful. I would love to stay a little longer.”
Not a single word about whether or not she liked him. That stung, but he did his best to ignore it. “Why don't you bring them with you when you travel?”
“I used to,” she admitted. “When it was just Maddie, I brought her everywhere with me and tutored her myself. I tried to keep it going after Alice was born, but it was rough. They got tired of always being on the road and not having kids their age to play with, so now I leave them with my sister when I'm away.”
“Wait, you taught her yourself?” He laughed, shaking his head in dismay. “Are you sure you're not a robot?”
Beck laughed, too, rolling her eyes. “I'm sure. There's more down time than you think in archaeology; plenty of time to keep an already smart girl from falling behind in her schooling.”
“They must take after their mom. I mean, you speak a zillion languages, so you gotta be pretty damn smart.” She was so reckless and carefree, it was hard to picture this woman digging in the dirt for broken clay pots, or wrangling two children to teach them math. From what he'd seen, it felt like Beck was describing a completely different person. He didn't want to offend her, so he refrained from pointing out that she came across less brilliant, multilingual career woman in her thirties and more Girls Gone Wild: Athens.
“Cheapann tú gur leathcheann mé.” He had no idea what the hell she'd just said, but he could tell from the look on her face that he hadn't been as good at keeping his thoughts to himself as he'd hoped. She looked both offended and darkly amused. “Pensi che una ragazza non possa essere intelligente e libera? Eísai vlákas, Mickey.”
He didn't bother asking for a translation; her tone told him he didn't want to know. “How many languages was that?”
Beck grinned. “Three. Gaelic, Italian, and Greek. I sometimes mix a few in the same sentence – I constantly mix Japanese and Korean at home; it makes my girls laugh – but I figured I'd be nice.”
Mickey opened his mouth to say he wouldn't have noticed the difference, and then stopped. He had noticed the difference; the lilt of her voice changed dramatically with each language. That was how he'd realized that she'd been speaking more than one in the first place. “I kinda wanna hear that mix, now. Are the languages that similar?”
“No.” She laughed. “Not at all. They share some slang thanks to pop culture, and both borrowed a lot from China, but they're structured differently, and the way they're spoken is different.”
“Then how do you mix them?”
“I speak them both,” she said with a shrug and another laugh. “If you speak more than one language well enough, they don't have to be similar to still flow. Like...” She smirked, leaning against him and batting her eyes. “Kimi wa baboya, demo... mada jowayo.”
“Showoff.”
“Yes.” Cracking up, she pulled him back to lie on the warm sand with her and cuddled close. “That time, absolutely.”
“Do you think you'll ever come back?” He'd been trying so hard to avoid the subject, but he just couldn't get his mind to budge from the fact that he didn't want her to leave.
With a fond smile, she kissed him before teasing lightly, “You gonna miss me, honey?”
Mickey grinned, hoping she couldn't see that he was feeling more melancholy than amused. “I think mostly I'll miss the sex. It's hard to find a woman who can keep up with me.”
“Oh, is that so?” She laughed and tickled him, making him squirm. Then she stopped, a warm, almost wistful smile on her face. “I'm gonna miss you, too, you know.”
Forced playful grin turning into a soft, genuine smile, he pulled her closer and kissed her. “I was beginning to worry you didn't like me.”
Beck grinned and nuzzled his neck. “The past twenty-four hours wouldn't have happened if I didn't like you.”
Feigning shock, Mickey gasped. “You mean you don't fuck strange men all over Greece indiscriminately?”
“No, that I do all the time,” she joked, hand sliding up one leg of his borrowed shorts. “But I only let the really special ones wear my clothes.”
He laughed, glancing down at himself; he'd forgotten for a second that they were hers. “Right. We should stop at my place so I can change and give these back before I take you back to your hotel.”
Beck sighed, snatching her hand back as if he'd burned her. “Right. Yeah, we should get going.”
Though he still hated that she had to leave, he kept his word and didn't try to stop her. Argyris tried to convince him to make some grand gesture at the airport, but Mickey shut him down with a grumpy, “It's her kid's birthday. I'm not that much of a selfish asshole.”
“I can't believe you're in love with this girl!” Hooting with laughter, Argyris slapped his back. “I'm a fuckin' matchmaker! Who knew?”
“Fuck off, Cupid!” Mickey grinned and shoved him away, hoping the other man couldn't see how shitty he really felt. He moped for a couple of days, barely paying attention to the world around him, just missing the crazy girl with the temper as fiery as her hair.
Then he answered an unexpected knock at his door and was baffled by the sight of a cute, petite brunette with huge blue eyes staring up at him. “Um... Can I help you?”
“Huh.” One dark eyebrow arching up, she called back over her shoulder, “You really do have a type.”
A familiar laugh made Mickey freeze in shock as Beck stepped into view behind the girl, another one in her arms. “I made the mistake of telling Maddie that I met this awesome DJ in Greece-”
“And since I have no friends anyway,” the girl, who he finally realized was Beck's older daughter, Madeline, cut in, “I figured there'd be no problem moving my 'party' somewhere more fun than my aunt's house. For the third year in a row.”
“Jesus, you might look like your dad, but you sound just like your mom!” The words slipped out before he could stop himself. While Madeline rolled her eyes, the little girl in her mother's arms – Alice, he figured – giggled.
“Yeah,” Beck agreed with a grin, moving closer and leaning past her daughters to kiss him. “She's got my snarky attitude. Gods help me. Thankfully, this one's still innocent.” She squeezed Alice tighter against her side, making her giggle again.
“Mommy! You're squishing me!”
“Her? Innocent? Did auntie tell you what she did to my stereo?!”
“It was an accident!”
“My butt it was!”
Wincing, Beck glanced at Mickey and mouthed, 'I'm sorry.' “Girls, enough. What have I told you about bickering in front of strangers?”
“I mean, you also tell us not to spread our legs for strangers, and yet...”
“Madeline Fiona O'Brien!”
“What?!” Eyes wide and looking frustrated, Madeline gestured to Mickey. “I'm kinda right!”
He couldn't hold it in anymore. Leaning on the door frame to stay upright, Mickey burst out laughing. God help this woman, he thought as he struggled to get his breath back. Her daughter's exactly like her!
Face even redder than her hair, Beck grumbled, “I did not tell her we slept together.”
“You couldn't shut up about him and your clothes smelled like dude. Doesn't take a genius.”
“Maddie, couldja stop? I kinda wanna see more of Greece than two buildings. If mom drags us home early cuz you're being a jerk, I will kick your seat the whole way back to Boston!”
“I'll let her.”
Mickey had just about gotten his laughter under control. Still chuckling, he yanked Beck into his arms and gave her a long, slow kiss. “You are dreaming if you think I'm letting you leave again.”
“That doesn't sound kidnappy at all!”
Laughing again, he released the blushing redhead only to trap Madeline in his arms and tickle her until she squeaked. “And you, little miss Queen of Sarcasm!” With a grin, he kissed the top of her head and released her, pleased to see that she was smiling. “Happy birthday.”
“Thanks.”
As he stepped aside to let them in, it finally dawned on him that he'd never actually worked a child's party before. He was used to crowds of rowdy drunk Greeks, not two innocent little girls. He didn't even know any kids, besides his own! He glanced helplessly at Beck, who snickered and kissed his jaw.
“Just do whatever; I can keep an eye on them. Maddie was more interested in the change of scenery than an actual party.”
“Does she really have no friends?”
She shrugged, turning to watch her daughters awkwardly settle on the couch and begin nudging and poking each other repeatedly. “She's never been the most social kid in the world. Around their own age groups, Liss is the bubbly extrovert and Maddie can't be bothered; she wanted to hang with kids her own age until she realized they annoy the hell out of her.”
“Argyris might know some people with kids...” He rolled his eyes. “He'll think I'm nuts, trying to hunt down teenagers, though.”
Beck laughed and shook her head. “No, really, don't worry about it. We don't even have to actually throw a party-”
Cutting her off with a kiss, Mickey insisted, “Oh, she's getting a party. When is her birthday, anyway?”
“Today, actually.”
He flinched, glancing at the clock, and then relaxed. It was still pretty early. “She's getting a party,” he repeated firmly. “She's fourteen! That... has no special significance in any culture I've heard of, but the kid still deserves some fun on her damn birthday. Especially if the last few have been disappointing.”
“The day after is pretty significant in our culture,” she murmured, so softly he almost didn't catch it.
“Is it?” Wasn't she American? He seemed to recall a whole conversation that almost turned into an argument about it. “Since when?”
Beck blushed again, looking uncomfortable. “Never mind.”
“...Girls, make yourselves at home. I need to talk to your mom for a minute.”
“You're talking now.”
He almost wrote that off as another snarky response, until he realized it had come from Alice. Looking innocently confused, she stared at him with almost comically large blue eyes, and he smiled. “In private,” he clarified as gently as he could as he grabbed Beck's wrist and tugged her down the hall toward his bedroom.
“Door open at all times!”
With a huff, Beck dug her heels in and spun around to glare at Madeline. “Who's the mom, here?”
“Sometimes I wonder.”
“Madeline.” Wrenching free of Mickey's grasp, she crossed her arms over her chest and stared her defiant offspring down. “Who's the mom?”
Glowering right back, Madeline mirrored her pose and grudgingly admitted, “You are.”
“Good. Now that we've got that cleared up, how about you show our host a little respect?”
Madeline's face was red as a tomato, but she still looked more angry and resentful than contrite, until she took a deep breath and turned to Mickey. With a surprising note of sincerity, she grumbled, “Sorry, Mickey.”
“Jet lag gets the best of all of us. Maybe you two should take a nap while your mom and I talk.” He didn't know what the hell else to say. He couldn't say 'it's okay' and undermine her mother, and 'you're forgiven' sounded kind of dickish. With an awkward smile, he waved and resumed dragging Beck down the hall.
As soon as the bedroom door was closed behind them, Beck sighed and leaned against it, looking worn out. “I'm so sorry about her. She's been so bitchy lately; my sister said she was even copping an attitude with her, which she almost never does.”
“She's probably just tired and been missing her mom.” In truth, he thought Madeline's sass was funny as hell, but he wasn't about to step into the middle of a mother-daughter war. Instead, he focused on his own curiosity. “What 'culture' celebrates the day after a birthday?”
She winced. “It's nothing, Mickey. Forget it.”
Weird. “What's the big deal? I'm just curious.”
“Alright, fine.” Looking and sounding resigned, she muttered, “If you're gonna judge or laugh, might as well get it out of the way – I'm a witch.”
Mickey stared at her. Whatever he'd been expecting her to say, it wasn't that. “...A witch?”
“I don't ride a broomstick and I can't turn you into a toad.” Oof. Defensive. Judging by her tone, she'd had this conversation before, and it hadn't gone well. “My sister's a witch, too, and so are my girls. There's an old tradition in the craft; at thirteen we find our deity, if we're meant to serve one, and a year and a day later, we pledge to their service.”
Light dawned. “Oh, that's why you always say 'Gods' instead of 'God'! That makes sense.” Who was he to judge? He wasn't particularly religious, but was any one religion really any weirder than the next? Curiosity abated, he brushed it off and tugged her into his arms. “My very own Sabrina.”
Beck snorted and dropped her head onto his shoulder. “Sometimes I feel more like Sarah Sanderson.”
“You really want me to throw a rager for your fourteen-year-old?” He didn't know what to say about her Hocus Pocus reference – 'horny and ditzy? Sounds about right' was...probably not the right thing – so he decided to just jump back to the original topic.
She shrugged. “I honestly don't know what to do for her. Coming back here was her idea, but I kinda doubt it had much to do with her birthday. She wasn't kidding about wondering which one of us is the parent; that kid's been trying to take care of me since she was little.”
“Why?”
Sighing, she stepped back out of his arms. She looked so sad and broken suddenly that he wished he'd never asked. “I would love to say that it's just who she is – and it is, to a point. Some people are just natural caregivers, and Maddie's definitely one of them. But I was a mess before Liss was born. Maddie's had to deal with a lot of bullshit, and it made her grow up too fast.”
That settled it in Mickey's mind. As he pulled his cell phone out of his pocket with one hand and opened the bedroom door with the other, he told her again, “She's getting a fucking party.”
Three hours and a lot of yelling at Agryris to get him to stop laughing later, he was setting up speakers in front of his apartment building, surrounded by what looked like every kid in Athens between twelve and sixteen, along with their parents. It definitely wasn't his usual crowd, to say the least, but they were friendly enough. Most importantly, Madeline was already smiling and laughing.
Remembering the posters he'd seen around town, he pulled his phone out again and called a number he hadn't used in quite a while. “Well, well. So you're in Athens. What do you know? I have a favor to ask you...”
“OHMYGOD! BASTIAN!”
Mickey grinned. Clearly, he'd made the right call, and it was earning him hugs galore. For the first time all day, Madeline was acting like a teenage girl, bouncing up and down and screeching with joy as Bastian made her way through the party. With a bright smile, she hugged the birthday girl and smoothed her dark curls back off of her face before approaching Mickey and hugging him. The second she moved back, Madeline launched herself at him, squeezing so tightly he thought she might crack a few ribs. And then her laughing mother replaced her, and he'd never felt so popular.
“Hell of a dad move,” Beck teased, grinning at him as she stepped aside and Maddie barreled into him again.
“Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!”
Laughing, Mickey lifted her up and kissed the top of her head. “Happy birthday.” She was too light; idly, he made a mental note to ask what the hell Beck and her sister were feeding these kids, or failing to feed them. Then he realized he sort of was acting like Maddie's dad and he blushed, setting her down.
As she ran off to dance with her little sister, he pulled Bastian up onto the platform and picked up the mic. “First of all – let's hear it for the birthday girl!” He pointed, and grinned when the revelers around him cheered, making the brunette blush. “Maddie O'Brien! You said you have no friends back in the States-” Boos echoed around them, and her color deepened. “-So I thought, what could make a better birthday present than a couple hundred Greek friends?”
The crowd cheered again, and a few “YEAH, MADDIE” shouts made the girl in question laugh, covering her face with the hand not holding tight to Alice's little wrist. Mickey noticed that she did that a lot; whenever the younger girl wasn't in her mother's arms, she was in her sister's tight, protective grip.
“What do you guys think?” He shouted into the mic. “This girl's really cool, right? You wanna be Maddie's friends, and show her how much better everything is here in Greece?”
The cheers were deafening. Mickey was grinning like a fool, and was pleased to see that so was Madeline. Big blue eyes shining, she stared up at him like he was her hero, and for a minute, life was pretty damn good. He'd die before admitting it aloud, at least so soon, but he could easily see a bright, happy future where he was stepdad to these two beautiful little girls, and they doted over their step-brother Hector, the way Maddie doted over Alice. He glanced at their mother, and couldn't help getting just a little choked up when he saw an identical look of joy and appreciation on her beautiful face. Man, it was nice to be the hero.
Before he could get too emotional and ruin the party, he pointed to Bastian. “You guys know who this is, right?” Another enthusiastic roar; he was a little jealous this time, but shoved it down and smiled. “Well, she's gonna take over for a little while, so make sure you give her some love, alright?”
Yanking her into one more tight hug, he handed the reins over to Bastian and hopped down. Beck immediately threw her arms around him and kissed him. “You are amazing, you know that? I descend on you unannounced with a grouchy teenager in tow, and you give her the best fucking night of her life!”
“All in a day's work,” he joked, squeezing her. “She seems like a great kid; they both do. I couldn't just do nothing and let her be miserable.”
“Hector is lucky.” She was grinning so wide, her face hurt; Mickey only knew because he was doing the same. “He's got a really great dad. If you'd do something like this for a kid you've never even met before, I can only imagine the lengths you'd go to for your own.”
“Think you can pass that praise on to my ex? Maybe she'll actually let me see him.”
Smile fading, she gripped his head with both hands and pulled him down to press their foreheads together. “If you want me to, I'll help you fight for him. You deserve to see your son, and he deserves to know his dad.”
“How long are you staying this time?” He didn't want to talk about Hector suddenly; not at a party surrounded by strangers and their children.
Seeming to sense his mood, Beck smiled and glanced at her giggling daughters. They were hopping around like lunatics to the music, surrounded by kids Maddie's age. She looked like she was having the time of her life. “From the looks of things now? Forever.” Mickey thought she was joking, but the look on her face stopped him from laughing it off. “I've never seen her so happy. Athens might just become home.”
“I hope so.” He shrugged, forcing a chipper smile to hide the desperately hopeful one he couldn't quite keep in. “It did for me!”
“We'll see.”
Unlike most of the parties he'd worked, this one started winding down fairly early as kids hugged Maddie, wished her a happy birthday, and were ushered home by their tired parents. Alice was asleep in Mickey's arms, her tiny body limp as a rag doll and her silky black curls tickling his nose. As the last of her party guests wished her well and left, Madeline hurried over to him and cuddled up to the side not currently occupied by the dead weight of her sister.
“Thank you, Mickey.”
“Did you have fun?” She nodded, and he smiled softly, stroking her dark hair. “Good. Let's get inside and get the little one into bed, shall we?”
She glanced around, frowning a little. “Where's mom?”
“Already upstairs.” Grinning, he watched her for a reaction and added casually, “With Bastian.”
Bright blue eyes widening, she gaped at him. “She's staying?”
Mickey laughed. “For tonight, at least, yeah. Come on.”
As they trudged through the door of his apartment a few minutes later, Mickey found himself wishing he'd stayed outside.
“No way!” Beck whipped around to gape at him while Bastian laughed. “You didn't tell me you were in a band!”
“Oh lord,” Madeline grumbled under her breath. “Get something pierced and she'll propose to you by midnight, I swear.”
Choking on a startled laugh, he lowered Alice into her sister's waiting arms. “Put her in Hector's bed. You and your mom can take mine tonight.” As she obediently wandered down the hall to tuck the younger girl in, Mickey flopped down on the couch beside Beck and tugged her into his arms. “That was a long time ago. Then she got her big break and got all famous, and she didn't need losers like me anymore.”
“Oh, that is such bullshit!” Laughing, Bastian stretched out to kick him. “We got a break. We got a deal. You were every bit a part of all that!”
“Oh, please!” Mickey rolled his eyes. “You never needed me. It was the Bastian Show, and we were just-”
“No! No, what happened was...”
They bickered for a while, going back and forth over who was to blame for Saint Claude's ultimate demise. After a few minutes, Beck excused herself and left the room, leaving the two old friends to catch up. When the argument showed no signs of ending, Mickey huffed and stood up, muttering something about getting a drink as he walked away. He loved Bastian, but damn she could be stubborn!
“What the fuck are you doing?” A glass in each hand, he stared at her as she laid out lines of cocaine on her phone's screen.
“What the fuck does it look like I'm doing?”
“Oh, god.” He grimaced, glancing toward the bedrooms. All quiet, but he didn't know if Beck and Maddie were asleep, or just hiding from the debate. “Come on, let's go in the bathroom.”
“The Brat Pack's asleep. Don't worry about it!”
“You don't know that,” he hissed. “Come on.”
Bastian rolled her eyes, but she allowed him to usher her into the bathroom. “You're paranoid. You barely even know these people! What do you care what they think?”
“I care,” he snapped, though he didn't refuse when she offered him a line. He'd just finished, was still hunched over the phone, when the door opened and he was faced with, basically, his worst nightmare: Madeline was standing in the doorway, hand on the knob.
They both froze, staring at her like deer in headlights. Face completely expressionless, Maddie looked at each of them, then at the line of cocaine still on the phone, and then straight at Mickey. "I just wanted to thank you again for today." Without another word, she calmly turned and left the room, closing the door behind her.
"Shit." Ignoring Bastian's drug-fueled giggle fit, Mickey was on his feet and chasing after the teen in a flash. "Maddie!"
Though her face was still a stony mask, there were tears in her eyes when she whirled around to face him. "I need to talk to you. Now."
"Okay." He gestured to the couch, but she shook her head.
"Outside. I don't wanna wake up mom or Alice."
Nodding, he followed her without another word. At first he'd thought she meant out in the hall, but she didn't stop until they were outside the building. "Maddie, listen-"
"Let her go." Mickey's heart broke when she turned to face him again. Tears running down her cheeks and lower lip trembling, she stared up at him with those huge blue eyes and he almost started crying with her. "You have to let her go. Mom's loyal even when she shouldn't be. She'll never break it off."
"Maddie, I don't want-"
"I only exist because my dad drugged and raped her!" Wiping furiously at her face while he shrank back in horror, she continued more calmly, "She doesn't know I know that, or that he tried to kidnap me a bunch of times when I was little. Auntie told me. She still stayed with him for almost a year. Will hit her, Owen was a toxic psycho, Alex was a racist jerk... Alice's dad was always really nice to us all when he came around, but he almost never did. And I don't know what he did, but he's in jail for life now." With a bitter grimace, she spat, "And you're a druggie."
Maddie's had to deal with a lot of bullshit, and it made her grow up too fast.
Beck's soft voice, so full of pain and regret, echoed in his head as Mickey sank down to sit on the steps and tugged Madeline into his arms. "I'm not a druggie," he assured her as she clung to him and broke down sobbing. "One time thing, kiddo, I promise."
"Like you'd say anything else!"
The little whimper that escaped her as she scooted up his leg to get closer and dropped her head onto his shoulder very nearly made him start crying with her. For all that she insisted he get the hell out of her life, he could tell that she was desperate for someone decent to stay. This poor kid was fourteen going on forty after watching her mom date a string of losers; no wonder she had no faith in men, or in her mother's ability to make sound decisions. He squeezed her a little tighter, not sure what to do or say.
"Mickey, I'm tired," she croaked, making his heart ache for her even more. He knew she didn't mean sleepy; she was tired of being the mature one, and he couldn't say he blamed her. "I'm so tired..."
"Shhh, it's okay, baby," he whispered, rubbing her back. "You can rest now. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. You're my little girl now, okay? And I won't let anything happen to you, or your sister, or your mom. You don't have to take care of her anymore, honey. I will. You just take a breath and be a kid while you can."
"How can I trust you?"
Well, that hurt, but he got where she was coming from. Pressing a soft kiss to the top of her head, he murmured, "I gotta earn that." He pried her loose and pushed her back a little, just enough to be able to look her in the eye. "Do you think you can give me a chance to?"
After a pause that felt like an eternity, Maddie sniffled and nodded. "Okay. But if you hurt her, I'll kick your nuts back up inside."
Laughing, Mickey nodded and smoothed her hair back. "Noted.” A thought occurred to him and he frowned. “Why did you aunt tell you all that? Putting that weight on a kid... That's cruel.”
“I asked,” she admitted with a shrug. “I asked why mom was such a mess, and why I didn't have a dad. So she told me.”
I'd have made some shit up, damn. Even high, he was smart enough not to say that. He chose not to say anything at all, and just held her for a while as the cool night air soothed their frayed nerves and her breathing slowly returned to normal.
“Mickey?”
“Hm?”
Voice a small, timid whisper, she asked, “Do you really wanna be my dad?”
Smiling softly, he kissed her head again and hugged her just a bit tighter. “I am your dad.” When she tensed and let out a frustrated huff, he explained, “I'm in love with your mom, kiddo. And I already love you and your sister. We're family now, and I'm not going anywhere. I promise.”
“You're weird.” He could hear her teasing smile in her voice, and he smiled, too, relieved. “You don't even know us.”
“I know enough. Come on.” Though all he wanted was to sit there and cuddle with her all night, he gently pushed her off his lap and stood. “It's getting late. You should get to bed.”
Sending her off down the hall to his bedroom when they got back upstairs, he collapsed on the couch and sighed. He'd known when he met her that Beck would make his life more interesting... he just had no idea how interesting.
A laugh beside him reminded him of his other guest and he reluctantly opened his eyes. Judging from the way she was twitching and snickering, Bastian had finished the rest of the coke. “That was intense!”
Mickey closed his eyes again. “If it's not already gone, get that shit out of my house.”
“Oh, come on!” She shoved him, grinning impishly. “Don't try to act all virtuous now! You were right there with me, until that kid walked in.”
“'That kid'?” Annoyed now, he sat up and glared at her. “My kid.”
“Not really, though.” Confused, she twisted to glance down the hall, and then back to stare at him. “...Right? I mean, shit, she does kinda look like you...”
He shook his head. “No. Biologically, no, but I don't care. I'm not gonna add my name to the list of guys who've hurt her.”
Bastian snorted, rolling her eyes. “Mickey, you can't just decide to play daddy to this random kid on a whim just because your ex won't let you see your own. She's not yours, and changing your whole life and personality isn't going to change that.”
“I haven't touched that shit in years. I'm not changing on a whim; you just don't know me anymore.”
“Enough,” she challenged, settling back in her seat and staring down her nose at him. “I know you well enough to know this is never gonna work.”
“What isn't?”
“This!” Bastian gestured vaguely around them. “This whole self-domestication shit. You're not some house husband and stepdad – you're a musician. You belong on the road, Mickey! Not shut up in some old lady's apartment playing House with some crazy chick and her walking, talking reminders of past mistakes.”
“Beck,” he snapped, glaring at her. “'That chick's' name is Beck, and her gorgeous daughters are Maddie and Alice. They're not mistakes. Alice is adorable and so smart, and Maddie is fucking awesome and she's been through Hell. I haven't seen you in years and you think you're gonna sit here in my house and tell me who I am and what I want? I don't fucking think so, Bastian.”
“Alright, alright!” She held up her hands in surrender, eyes wide. “Chill. I just miss you, okay? I want you to come on tour with me, like the old days, not sit here and rot away in some mediocre domestic life. You could have so much more!”
Mickey sighed, staring off into space for a moment. Some part of him was drawn to her offer, but that wasn't him anymore. He didn't actually want to tour with her, he just hated feeling settled; at some point in his wild youth, stability had begun to feel like stagnation, and now he found himself often desperate to avoid it, even if it came with everything he truly wanted.
He thought about Beck, and her bright smile and her two beautiful, lonely daughters, and he thought about Hector. Beck had been spot-on; as much as he did love Greece, Mickey had really only stayed this long because of his son. He wanted to be in Hector's life. Now he wanted to be in Maddie and Alice's lives, too. He wanted a family.
And for the first time, he was willing to fight for that family.
“You're right,” he admitted slowly. “You're right, I've been hiding here, just floating around aimlessly.” Before she could get all triumphant, he stood and growled, “But that's not what I'm doing now. Now, I'm finally seeing a life that I want, and I'll be damned if I'll let anyone take it away from me.”
That said, he walked away without giving Bastian a chance to argue. He peeked into his son's room to check on Alice, smiled when he saw the way she was sprawled, half hanging off the bed, and he quietly closed the door and headed to his own room. Hopefully Maddie wouldn't mind; he'd originally intended to crash on the couch, but he couldn't stand to be in the same room as Bastian, and couldn't quite bring himself to kick her out, either. Moving slowly, so as to avoid waking either of the bed's other two occupants, he slid in next to Beck.
She immediately rolled over and cuddled close to him. At first he thought she was just fidgeting in her sleep, but then she whispered, “Don't let anyone change you or tell you who you are. Not even me.”
“I won't.” He tried to smile, couldn't quite manage it, and kissed her, instead. “Goodnight.”
“Night.”
It wasn't quite a seamless transition. Mickey's place was too small for a family of four, and he didn't exactly love the idea of moving a bunch of heavy audio equipment down those winding stairs. Though he wanted to jump right into living together, he didn't put up much of a fight when Beck started looking for her own place.
It helped that she didn't spend a lot of time at home. Once the girls were enrolled in school, their mother started dropping them off and then going straight to Mickey's place. She helped Argyris translate for Mickey and his clients, which both men had thought was a terrible idea... until they saw her in action. The short fuse he'd become so familiar with in their first couple of days together was nowhere to be found. Around even his most difficult clients, Beck was the embodiment of charm and professional courtesy. Mickey quickly found that while Argyris was better for direct translation, he was no match for Beck when it came to diplomacy and deescalating a heated argument.
“You haven't seen 'difficult',” she teased, “until you've been a woman in a male-dominated field arguing for funding. This is nothing.”
Mickey laughed, yanking her into his arms. “Where have you been all my life?”
She flinched, closing her eyes and pressing her fingertips to her mouth for a second. It was the briefest of moments, and then she was smiling again and joking, “On my knees in the dirt, mostly,” but he refused to ignore it.
“You okay?”
With a little shrug and a nod, she admitted, “Been a little queasy and lightheaded lately, but I'm fine. It never lasts long.”
“You are so American.” She glared at him and he grinned, pleased that he knew how to get her attention. “You're not in Dystopia anymore – go to a doctor.”
“Did you not hear me? I'm fi-”
“I heard 'lately,'” he countered, poking her side and immediately regretting it when she cringed. Right; queasy. Maybe don't mess with her stomach, Mickey. “'Lately' means this is not normal. It means you're sick, so go to a doctor.”
She shook her head, winced, and dropped it onto his shoulder. “I don't need a doctor.”
“You can't even move without turning green.”
“I'm fine. I don't need a doctor.”
“Why are you being so stubborn? You're supposed to help me with stubborn people, not be the Queen of them!”
“Am I your girlfriend or your lawyer?”
“That's not what I meant and you know it. Don't change the subject.” Rubbing her back, he insisted as gently as he could, “Please just go get checked out.”
“I don't need to. I'm fine.”
“Look, even if it's minor, do you wanna suffer or find out what's wrong and get better?”
“I don't need a doctor to tell me what I already know!”
What she already knew? He frowned, more confused than ever. “Is it some kind of chronic-”
“Mickey, I'm not sick – I'm pregnant!”
He froze, gaping at her in shock. She started to pull away, but he tightened his grip on her waist before she could stand up. “You're what?”
Looking nervous and uncomfortable, she mumbled, “I was trying to find the right time to tell you; we've just been so busy with that 'make it more Greek' asshat...”
“You're really pregnant?” When she slowly and carefully nodded, Mickey grinned and hugged her as tight as he dared. “That's fantastic!” He finally let her up, only to stand with her and frame her face with both hands. Between frantic kisses all over her face, he gushed, “That's incredible! Have you told the girls yet? Oh, Alice is gonna be so excited to be a big sister! And Hector! I can't wait for Hector to meet his little brother or sister!”
“Mickey...”
He glanced around, smile dimming just a bit. “Damn, we gotta get a bigger place.”
“Mickey.”
“I wonder if Agryris' grandmother had-”
“Mickey!” Shoving his hands away, Beck got a tight grip on his hair and forced him to turn back to face her. “Do you really think we can do this?”
He blinked, taken aback by that. “Don't you?”
“Three kids, and fighting for joint custody of a fourth?” She shook her head, looking at him like he was an idiot. “The thought that we might be in over our heads crossed my mind, yeah. I was struggling with just two!”
“Well, now you have me.” His cheeky grin didn't seem to comfort her as much as he'd hoped it would. “You were struggling 'cause you were alone; now you're not.”
“A single mom with two kids really isn't all that different from two parents with four,” she pointed out, releasing his hair and crossing her arms over her chest. Seeing the hurt he tried to mask, she sighed. “Look, I'm glad you're excited, I am. And whether we're ready or not, the kid's on the way, I just... I just wish I shared your optimism. I'm not excited, Mickey; I'm scared to death.”
“Well, get excited,” he jokingly commanded, pulling her close for another hug. “We'll be fine. Besides, it's not like Aspa's ever gonna give me full custody, so it's not really two to four. Maddie's old enough that she doesn't need constant hyper-vigilance from us, so it's really just two to two-and-a-half.”
Finally, finally, Beck laughed. It was quiet and weak, but a laugh nonetheless. “Jesus, you're like sunshine in human form. Does anything ever get you down?”
He shrugged. “Sure, but I try not to let it for long. And I see a new baby as something to celebrate, not freak the hell out over.”
“See, you get to see it that way because you don't have to push it out,” she teased. “It's not so perfectly sunny from where I'm standing.”
“No one said life is perfect.” Still smiling like a fool, he kissed her. “Whatever you need, I'm here. You're not doing everything alone anymore. We got this.”
“I love you.”
It didn't seem possible, but somehow his smile got even wider. “I love you, too.”
“Speaking of Aspa, though...”
“Oh, god, what?”
With a laugh and an apologetic smile, Beck ventured, “I don't think you should come today.”
“What?”
Her smile immediately faded; apparently, he was really bad at hiding it when he was confused and offended. “Baby, you're chaos incarnate. It's one of the things I love about you, but it's not exactly conducive to a civilized conversation with a woman who probably kind of hates you.”
“Yeah, thanks.”
“I just think I might have better luck getting through to her, single mom to single mom.” She looked like she was waiting for him to hit her, which only made him feel worse. “I know how hard it is, and how, whether we mean to or not, we tend to villainize our exes-”
He snorted, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, well, with the stellar guys you've dated, it makes sense. It's not really villainizing if he's already a villain.”
“Exactly how much did Madeline tell you?”
Uh-oh. She was mad. Knowing he was in trouble no matter what and refusing to drag his stepdaughter down with him, Mickey hastily changed the subject. “Do you really think I'll fuck things up that badly if I go?” Why was he even asking? Offended or not, he knew she was right; Aspa hated his guts.
Thankfully, Beck let the dig about her exes drop and her steely expression melted back into one of gentle sympathy. “I just want you to have the best chance possible of getting to be an active part of Hector's life. I want him to know you, to sleep in that bed you bought him before he outgrows it, to meet his new sisters. And I think your feelings towards Aspa, and hers toward you, are probably too raw and volatile right now for a face-to-face meeting to be a good idea.”
“Alright.” Forcing a faint smile, he nodded. “Alright, go. You've got a point.”
“I'll tell you all about it when I get back, okay?” She promised with an equally strained smile, kissing his cheek.
“Can't wait.”
When she came back a little while later, she was laughing. Mickey's hopes that it meant things had gone better than expected were dashed, though, when she managed to gasp out, “She really hates you!”
“Yeah, thanks.” He shook his head. “I knew that much.”
“I'm sorry.” Still giggling, Beck wound her arms around his waist. “She was just such a bitch. I kinda respect the hell out of her.”
“What did she say?”
“That you're a baby,” she dutifully recited, “and you're irresponsible, unreliable...”
“Why is this funny?!”
“Because, Mickey... Mickey, honey...” Framing his face like he had to her earlier, she told him, “It's nothing I didn't already know. You're flighty and you're a big kid; this isn't news. She was floored that I love you anyway, and my god, the look on her face when I went off about how that childishness is what makes you such a good dad, and you're great with the girls... I haven't been able to stop laughing since! Pretty sure she hates me now, too.”
“Great!” Failing to see the humor, Mickey jerked free of her light grasp and moved away, beginning to pace the room. “So instead of helping, you just alienated her from us both!”
“We're going to see him on Saturday.”
“What?” He spun to stare at her; she wasn't laughing anymore. “Are you serious?”
Looking rather proud of herself, she nodded. “Supervised by Aspa, of course, but yep. You get to spend time with your son, and I finally get to meet him. It doesn't matter what she thinks of either of us, as long as she can see that you give a shit; that we're safe to be around Hector, and can be trusted to think of him first. Show her how much you love him, that even childish and flaky you can be reliable, that you want to be reliable, and a supervised visit might turn into father-son weekends, without your ex underfoot.”
“I... wha... how...?”
She shrugged, smiling faintly. “Mother to mother. We came to an understanding.”
Overwhelmed by emotions he couldn't even identify, Mickey closed the distance between them and lifted her up. “I fucking love you, you know that?”
Beaming as he set her down, Beck leaned in for a kiss. “I love you, too, baby.”
“That's not cute anymore.” Despite his protests, he was grinning as he backed her toward the bedroom. “Now I just feel like you're calling me a baby. That sucks. Don't do that.”
“I'll call you what I want,” she teased, pulling him down for another kiss. “And you can't stop me!”
With a hand on her belly, he joked, “How about you call me 'daddy'?”
“No.” She laughed and shook her head. “I physically cannot do that. I'll puke.”
“Well, morning sickness is pretty common.”
“No, this is pure disgust.”
They were both laughing now as they reached the bed; he almost playfully shoved her back, but then remembered the baby and thought better of it. Instead, he flopped across it himself and beckoned for her to join him. “We're gonna be okay, you know.”
Beck winced as she settled gingerly on the edge of the bed. “It's just such bad timing. I don't...”
“Hey.” He tugged at her arm until she stretched out beside him, and wound his arms around her. “It's all gonna be okay. No matter what life throws at us, we'll deal with it together, okay? I want this baby. I know you want this baby. The rest is just details.”
“Pretty big fucking details. I was supposed to go to Mongolia next month.”
“Then go.” God, he didn't want her to, but he was determined to show her that they could be together, be a family, without completely derailing her life. When she looked at him like he'd lost it, he gave her a bland 'are you kidding' look right back. “You're not really gonna try to convince me that you weren't still going on digs when you were pregnant with Alice, are you?”
She blushed. “My team didn't know...”
“So don't tell them this time, either.”
“Mickey...” Pushing his arms away, she sat up. “You really have no idea how physically demanding my work is, do you? I almost lost Alice.”
For a second, he floundered, wondering what the hell to do or say. Then he brightened and sat up, as well. “You speak a million languages; just work as a translator until you're safe to go back out into the field.”
“...I do love it,” she conceded, making him perk up. “And maybe I can finally teach you some Greek so you can talk to your son more easily.”
Mickey chuckled. “I'm not getting out of that, am I?”
“Nope.” She grinned and settled back against his chest as he leaned against the headboard. “Not until we're both fluent.”
“Alright, I'm in.” He smiled, kissing her jaw and lacing their fingers together. “New home for us, new job for you, learning a new language...”
“New baby on the way.”
“New baby on the way,” he parroted, pressing their linked hands to her belly. “New chapter.”
“Here's to a new life.”
Mickey nodded and leaned down for a proper kiss, murmuring against her lips, “Together.”
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myfanwymusings · 4 years ago
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MILEY CYRUS / PLASTIC HEARTS
Below is a collection of lyric starters from Miley Cyrus’ 2020 release Plastic Hearts. All lyrics are being posted in their original wording, but please feel free to change pronouns or words to fit your purposes. Please note there are references to death, toxic relationships, drug use, alcohol, and sexual relationships. Be mindful if you are sensitive to these topics. This is reposted from my former blog.
WTF Do I Know?
I'm not tryna have another conversation
I'm the type to drive a pickup through your mansion
Pourin' out a bottle full of my frustration
Here to tell you somethin' that you don't know
Am I wrong that I moved on and I and I don't even miss you?
Thought that it'd be you until I die
What the fuck do I know?
I'm alone cause I couldn't be somebody's hero
You want an apology?
I had to leave you
Think that I'm a problem? Honey, I'm the solution
Maybe all the chaos is for your amusement
Loved it, then I hate it, and I let you go
Plastic Hearts
You can be whoever you wanna be here
I should really go home  
I don't even know 'em, but they won't leave here
Pull you in, but don't you get too close
Frightened by my own reflection
Desperate for a new connection
I've been California dreamin'
Keep me up all night
I just wanna feel somethin' but I keep feeling nothin' all night long
I just wanna feel somethin'
I can be whoever you want me to be
Angels Like You
Won't call me by name, only "baby"
The more that you give, the less that I need
Everyone says I look happy
Everyone says I look happy when it feels right  
I know that you're wrong for me
It's not your fault I ruin everything
It's not your fault I can't be what you need
They say that misery loves company
Angels like you can't fly down here with me
I'm everything they said I would be
Before you let go, just one more time
Take off your clothes, pretend that it's fine
A little more hurt won't kill you
You don't look happy
Prisoner
Can't get you off my mind, lord knows I tried a million times.
Why can't you just let me go?
My hands are tied
I can't control it
I’ll never escape it
I need the high
You keep making it harder to stay but I still can't run away
You keep making it harder to stay
I still can't run away
I tasted Heaven, now I can't live without it
I can't forget you and your love is the loudest
Gimme What I Want
Careful, you might hurt yourself
Pleasure leads to pain. To me, they're both the same
Pleasure leads to pain
You might be insane but maybe we're the same
You came here cause you know what I need and no one likes to be alone
Tonight you came here cause you know what I need  
I don't need a future,
I don't need your past
I just need a lover
I don't need a future, I don't need your past, I just need a lover
You don't have to ask.
So give me what I want, or I'll give it to myself
I can tell that you're new to this
Give it to me, babe
Give it to me and nobody else, babe
Night Crawling
Sometimes I'm good for nothin'
Sometimes I need your lovin'
Cravin' attention under the disco ball
Gotta listen when the Devil's callin'
When it's yellin' out my name, I chase it
Sometimes my thoughts are violent
Sometimes I sit in silence  
I'm running for my life
Midnight Sky
It's been a long night and the mirror's telling me to go home  
it's been a long time since I felt this good on my own
it's been a long time since I felt this good
Lotta years went by with my hands tied up in your ropes
I was born to run, I don't belong to anyone
I don't need to be loved by you
See my lips on her mouth, everybody's talkin' now  
Everybody's talkin' now
It ain't so bad if I wanna make a couple mistakes
You should know right now that I never stay put in one place
I don't hide blurry eyes like you
High
Sometimes I get a little too hurt
Got my mind goin' places it ain't wanna go
Sometimes I get a little too low
And you're like a neon light shinin' through a door that I can't keep closed
In my head, I did my very best saying goodbye  
I don't miss you but I think of you and don't know why  but I still feel high
I still feel high
Sometimes I stay up all night cause you don't ever talk to me in my dreams
I think about eventually you holdin' me and dancin' to the record like a movie scene
Hate Me
You can say it's my fault if it still hurts at all
You can say it’s my fault
I thought one of these days you might call
Drownin' in my thoughts  staring at the clock
I know I’m not on your mind
I wonder what would happen if I die  
I hope all of my friends get drunk and high
Would it be too hard to say goodbye?
I hope that it's enough to make you cry
Maybe that day you won't hate me
You can say that I've changed  
Just say it to my face
One drink, and I’m back to that place
The memories won't fade  
Bad Karma
You may think I'm ghostin', but the truth is I'm a liar
I sell you what I tell you, but you ain't a fucking buyer
They say it's bad karma when you live a double life
I've always picked a giver 'cause I've always been the taker
I'd rather just do it, then I'll think about it later
It's bad karma being such a heart breaker
I don't play the nicest but it ain't a fucking crime
I never learn my lesson so I always do it twice
I don't give a fuck
I don't believe in luck
I do what I wanna do
Never Be Me
I know I do this every time
I stop myself before the crime
I don't wanna push you way too much
I don't wanna lean that way too far
I don't wanna ever learn the hard way
if you're looking for stable, that'll be never be me
If you're looking for faithful, that'll never be me
If you're looking for someone to be all that you need that'll never be me
Hard as I try that'll never be me
I play with fire
Dry your tears now, don't you cry
I know I do this every time
I'm by your side, at least for a while
Can't get too close to the sun
Baby, you're the only one
I'd never lie to you
You give me a reason to run from the fire
Golden G String
Yes, I've worn the golden g-string
I put my hand into hellfire
I did it all to make you love me and to feel alive
I was thinkin' about my life and the questions made more questions  
You dare to call me crazy, have you looked around this place?
The old boys hold all the cards and they ain't playin' gin
I should walk away but I think I'll stay  
There are layers to this body.... they told me I should cover it, so I went the other way
There are layers to this body, primal sex and primal shame
I was tryin' to own my power
I'm tryin' to work it out
At least it gives the paper somethin' they can write about  
If you can't make ends meet, honey, it must be your fault  
We all focus on the winners and get blinded by their shine
Maybe caring for each other's just too 1969
I have too much lose so I think I'll stay. I can't walk away
I have too much lose
I think I'll stay
I can't walk away  
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