#and boy is my con modifier high

[reitziluz]

what do you mean writing a post takes actual real time. feels like it should b illegal. i meant to do some chores before having my afternoon snack!!

[gallusrostromegalus]

If you ever want to do a "Top 10 home gardening tomato cultivars" segment, I'm here for it. (My folks mostly plant Early Girls, but they have a ridiculously short growing season up there. I grow Sweet 100s, because they taste good enough and I gave up on growing anything other than cherries due to bastard squirrels who like to take exactly one bite out of larger tomatoes.)

OH

IT IS NOW TIME TO INFO DUMP

CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED

Ok so the actual thing with tomatoes is there are- checks google- about 10,000 tomato cultivars out there and every single one of them is different, so you should tailor your tomato breeds to what you actually want to do with them.  10K is a lot a breeds to break down, but fortunately, there are ways to Do That:

1. Determinate vs. Indeterminate 

Determinate tomatoes grow to a genetically predetermined size and start fruiting.  Pros: Tends to have a short time between planting and fruiting, don’t get bigger than a certain size if you only have so much space. Cons: Once they’re done fruiting, that’s it. you really only get the one crop out of them.  Also tend to have sad, watered-down flavor.

Indeterminate tomatoes grow as big as the space will let them, and start fruting when they get around to it. Pros: Maximum Plant for minimum investment, which can be like 10x as big as a determinate plant. Will KEEP fruiting until it gets too cold, so if you can get it in a pot you can move inside you could potentially still be harvesting tomatoes after thanksgiving like my MIL was this year.  If you live somewhere warm like SoCal or AZ, you could keep it alive all year. Cons: MUCH longer time between planting and fruiting.  Indeterminate tomates Get there when they get there. Also may be more prone to disease and pests than the more-modified determinate plants.

There are determinate and indeterminate tomatoes in all 5 of the Greater Tomato Archetypes.  Speaking of:

2. The 5 Tomato Archetypes

I’m so good at segues! 

So tomatoes come in 5 basic types, each which is generally better for something culinary than the others.  You CAN substitute different types of tomato but your food generally doesn’t come out as good.

1. Cherry: Cherry tomatoes produce fruits that are about the size of cherries.  Some people put Grape and Saladette tomatoes in here but they are WRONG, both of those belong in the “Round/All-Purpose” group because Cherry tomatoes specifically have thinner skins, more soluable pectin, and more dissolved glutemates, which means they cook VERY differently.  Cherry tomatoes also produce a shitload of fruits at a time and might be some of the heaviest producers.  Tend to be more heat-tolerant. Good For:  Fresh tomato sauces (i.e. takes less than 20 minutes to make), salads, snacking on directly off the vine like you are a small tarsier discovering a hidden bounty of fruit.

Top reccomendations are: -Indigo Cherry or Dwarf Black Krim if you can find it. I always reccomend dark-pigmented tomatoes as I find they have better flavor, pest resistence and UV tolerance. Taste fruity but not over-sweet and Very Tomato-y.  -Sweet 100/Super-Sweet 100/Sweet Millions: All varietals of the same mass-producing Cherry Tomato. Makes absolute buckets of Tomatoes, sweeter and more fruity than the Indigo cherry, good disease resistence and long growing season.

2. Paste: Paste tomatoes are thin-skinned, meaty and soft tomatoes that... well, they make good tomato paste, the basis for all long-cooking tomato sauces and recipies. They tend to be kind of Oblong and sometimes grow in fun extras like lil tomato “dicks” or weird cthulian shapes, but this doesn’t effect the flavor or nutrition There’s a shitload of great varietals in this category, I’ve yet to hear of a Bad Paste Tomato, just Less Excellent ones.   Good For: Long-cooking Tomato-based dishes like: Bolognese, chili, ketchup, BBQ etc.  Also can and freeze well.

Top Reccomendations are: -Amish Paste: MEATY, and well-suited for growing in a variety of conditions.  Paste is smooth and velvety.  Good for Chili, BBQ and Bolognese. -Opalka tomato: Russian Tomato, little more on the acidic side, grows well in places prone to surprise late frosts.  Paste isn’t as smooth but very thick. makes great ketchup. -San Marzano: THE tomato for making Marinara Sauce (also does good bolognese). Sweeter and lighter, with a slightly runnier paste that clings well to pasta. cans and freezes excellently, does well in places with HOT summers.

3. Beef: Beef tomatoes are BIG motherfuckers that kind of take a long time to grow but are very rewarding.  Beef tomatoes are firm, have a very solid meat and are best eaten raw, typically sliced onto a sandwich or seared under a broiler for a NZ Mousetrap. Not only are the fruits big but so are the Plants, so they take a long time to reach maturity and the fruit takes FOREVER to ripen but if you like a sandwich, they can’t be beat.  Also they look hella impressive on instagram. They also tend to be more prone to Blossom End Rot (which is just a calcium deficiency- just make sure to fertilize with some eggshells and don’t over-water them), and despite the size, don’t tolerate cold well. Good for: Slicing on sandwiches, eating raw like you’re biting into the still-beating heart of your nemesis and enjoying that sweet, sweet revenge, searing quickly under a broiler or putting on a Kabob.

Top Reccomendations Are: -Brandywine: Hefty, great fresh tomato flavor, and PINK.  -Big Zac: Goddamn Massive Tomato. A Real Heckin’ Chonker. meatier flavor and lots of firm flesh with few seeds. -Beefmaster: One problem with Beef tomatoes is that a lot of them are heirloom varietals that aren’t as widely available. Of the ones that are easy to get your hands on, Beefmaster is the best, but it lacks the flavor punch of Brandywine or Big Zac, but it’s not a BAD tomato.

4. Round/Early/All-Purpose: The Workhorse of Tomatoes, the Round Tomato does it all- sauces, salsa, sandwiches, salads, and snacks.  But it doesn’t do them quite as well as the other, more specialized tomatoes.  Also, some of these tomatoes have been Over-Worked and bred to fruit early and transport well, at the expense of it’s Flavor.  I’M TALKING ABOUT YOU, EARLY GIRL AND BETTER BOY, YOU FLAVORLESS TENNIS BALLS, YOU INSULTS TO THE MIGHTY HOUSE OF NIGHTSHADES. Love yourself, don’t get Early Girl or Better Boy. If your season is too short for anything but the earliest of tomatoes, it may be better to grow Something Else than put all that effort in for Disappointment. That said, there are many types of Round/All-Purpose tomatoes that haven’t been overbred into corporate blandness, and I can reccomend them in good concisence if you’re not totally sure what you want to do with your tomatoes: Good For: Indecisive people, people just learning how to grow plants, using one plant for a variety of purposes, people who are not yet prepared to enter the world of Tomato Opinions. Top reccomendations are: -If you really must have an early-fruiting tomato, the Wayahead is an heirloom that people swear comes in early with good size, flavor and firm structure.  I have not personally tied this varietal but people I trust like it. -Black Krim: GOD-TIER TOMATO. It’s got it all- flavor, high yields, firm structure, pest and disease resistence, fucking purple stripes. Cans Well, Freezes well, seeds well and breeds true. Fuck yes. Other tomatoes fucking WISH they had what this Hot Bitch has. -Invincible is a damn-hard-to-kill tomato that isn’t very large but fruits reliably and preforms well all around.  it also ripens 3 fruits at a time so you’re not constantly overburdened with Tomato.  Probably my top pick for beginners that need an Emotional Support Crop.

5. Fun: This is not, strictly speaking, a traditional type of tomato, but I feel like it’s an important category for people who want to do something different or really enjoy all Tomatoes have to offer. Good For: Trying new things, taunting the garden gods with my hubris, showing off at the garden FB group, discovering new flavors of plant.

Top Reccomendations: -Mr. Stripey:  it has a goofy name, it’s yellow-and-pink striped, and it smells and tastes almost exactly like pineapple, but it doesn’t try to digest you back.  I love it. -Japanese Truffle: Dark Brown tomato that looks like someone tried to make ferro rochers at home and bungled it, and has a LONG maturation time, BUT it’s got a chocolately flavor and even at maturity has green insides which give it this. Lightness?  it’s hard to describe but it’s a fascinating flavor. The plant also is more branched and elegant than most tomatoes. Very different, very cool. -I have not personally tried Cherokee Purple but I have heard good things about it. We’ll see how it does in the garden this year. -Tomatillos and Ground Cherries:  Not actually tomatoes, but closely related. Neat herbaceous sort of flavor, like thyme but to the left.  Also comes in a fun Organic wrapping paper. -Ketchup ‘n’ Fries: a Sweet 100 tomato top grafted onto Kennebec Potato rootstock, so it grows both tomato AND potato!  Grafting was invented prbably about a week after the concept of agriculture was, and consists of taking two or more closely related plants and taping a cutting of oone into a hole in the other until the plants heal together.  Like that one gorilla-dude from Umbrella academy, but without the angst.  You can get them pre-made or attempt to make them at home if you’re feeling adventurous and are OK with potentially killing a bunch of starts while you learn.

Good Luck and Happy Gardening!

[eijishimas]

Denki thirsts are on the way!! But like I totally see him being a super pervert. Like he's the type to accidentally walk in on you changing and apologize while not so sneakily taking a pic of you. Or him joining you in the shower just so he can "innocently" wash your hair, but turns into him groping you because he can't help himself

anon!! thank you for indulging in my current denki brainrot that has continued on this morning, i honestly love this thirst ugh

he’s so cute please help me

currently, thirsts are open but only for denki <3

dating denki kaminari certainly came with pros and cons (the pros definitely outweighing the cons but hey! no one’s perfect). as you two got older, it seemed that his pervy tendencies lessened, but they were still very much there. take for instance when you got new shorts to wear around the house. they were boy short, and they rode up a bit on your ass if you bent down to grab something from the floor. denki complimented you, saying it suited your figure very well, earning him a slightly flustered expression from you. though, you caught him shamelessly staring at your ass as you did the chores around the apartment, occasionally giving a tap or two to your behind as he passed casually. he even grabbed a handful, kissing your head before moving on to play video games with the boys™.

when he does laundry, he has to fight the urge to stuff one of your panties into his pocket for later use. he traces the thin fabric, fingers curiously exploring the hem of it as his mind runs with the idea of what you would look like sprawled out on the bed, sobbing from his cock filling you up in this particular set. babe’s already got a semi-hard on just thinking about it. when you catch him, he lets out a shout of surprise, face instantly reddening at the notion of being caught. why was he turned on even more at that fact. he just has a very active imagination, was that so much of a crime? you were his gorgeous partner, he was allowed to be a little h word sometimes.

then came the “sneaky” pictures he took of you while you were changing in your shared bedroom. it wasn’t anything he hadn’t seen before, it was more the fact he was saving them for later when he went on long missions so he could jerk a quick one in the back alley before a stealth mission because his nerves were acting up. it doesn’t take much for him to work himself up, needing some sort of release for the building stress.

and the last one, oh god, whenever denki joins you in the shower it starts off romantic. washing your hair, giving you sweet and sappy compliments of how stunning your body was, how he loved every single part of you inside and out. he was a lucky guy. he couldn’t help the way his lips attached to your neck, sucking dark marks on your skin as a way to claim what was his. his hands were sliding down your waist under hot water, your breathing hitching. his fingers are already prodding at your entrance, gathering your natural slickness. his excited giggles are apparent as he pushes a finger into you just up to his first knuckle. i’m now realizing this is too long to be a thirst but idc we’re continuing on—

your legs struggle to hold your body up as he adds a second digit, the way he’s nipping at your collar is intoxicating and it only makes you try to grind on his fingers. denki knows he’s good with his hands, his other free one groping at your breast, pinching at your nipples harshly as his mind is melting with the realization that it was his hands all over you. his dick is getting hard, you can feel it against your ass, but he doesn’t tear his touch from you for a second. he’s eager, far too eager, and it shows in the way he thrusts a third finger in and you whine at the stretch. he’s got this grin on his face, watching you so intensely as your resolve crumbles. it strokes his ego to watch your eyes roll back, your hips stuttering and bucking against his hand as you moan his name again, and again, and again. it’s all over for you the moment he sets his thumb on your clit, rubbing harsh up and down motions as his fingers delve deep, curving to stroke the spot you want him most.

you cum hard on his fingers and he’s practically salivating at how you clench around him. as soon as he finishes helping you ride out your high, he’s pulling out his fingers and licking them clean himself, drunk on the taste of your essence. it doesn’t surprise you that he’s already getting on his knees, tongue licking a stripe up your slit with a certain giddiness to him. he was eating good today.

ah well, you could always take another shower later anyways.

all works © eijishimas 2021. do not reuse, modify, or repost.

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@cynthus-no @stoopidnekobish @loveeijii @brialoveskbtbb

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[nival-kenival]

~~ Endlessly searching for His Highness ~~

My Hua Cheng cosplay but only back shots, the other pictu4es will be available shortly on my Instagram! But like oh boy, I did an 8km hike in this cosplay in 5C weather and it started snowing at the end of it, so it is Con approved, only 3 bits fell off (not including 2 fake nails) so im excited to bring him to a convention once it's safer. As per usual, I made the robe myself, and heavily modified everything else! But im just so happy with how he turned out!

[camelliagwerm]

Is Sosiel really that poorly statted out in WOTR or is it a meme? I never really used him in hard combats.

I don't think it's terrible, but just poorly optimized, honestly. Depending on where you heard that (I’m going to assume Reddit, because they have the absolute worst takes) - that’s basically saying they’re trash when like....he could be Harrim. He at least has better domains than Harrim. Disclaimer: I don’t play on anything above normal, so I can’t say how effective this is on higher difficulties like core etc.

His stats are: STR 16 / DEX 10 / CON 14 / INT 10 / WIS 19  / CHA 14

Honestly the only stat that isn’t amazing there is his dexterity, considering Dexterity is used for AC bonus. I do think he should’ve started with 18 Wisdom and 13 Charisma to bump it up to 12 Dexterity just so he has a little of something - and in that case I would consider that a very solid starting stat array for when you get him. Remember you can find plenty of magical items that can boots your ability scores, so really, a 10 in Dex isn’t the end of the world. You don’t need to invest anymore in his STR really (unless you want him to be more melee foused) because of this. What I usually do is boost his DEX up to 12 and then put the rest of the ASI into WIS for those spell slots.

He’s also generally not as bad as people make him out to be: while he’s never going to compete with Daeran ‘Healbot’ Arendae in the raw healing output department, I never found myself struggling with healing with my party set-up. I made a couple of changes: firstly, I gave him the Boundless Healing mythic feat and the Impossible Domain mythic feat: specifically, Community. Excellent level 8 ability that’s great for longer fights and an instant heal at level 1 that you get to use 3+Wis Mod a day that does 1d6 + level in class. So for my Sosiel, that level 1 ability was available 8 times a day for 1d6 + 20 healing and it also removes fatigued, shaken and sickened. It’s like a mini Paladin’s Lay on Hands or Warpriest’s Fervor. Combine that with being to turn any prepared spell into the cure wounds spell of that level, his extra and selective channel, and he can make a very solid healer with the Good & Luck doamin buffs, cleric summoning spells and the typical buff options. 

He worked for my party at least because I ran a very high AC/high HP/high self-sustain party with Valerius being a Judge/Armiger/Hellknight Legend (52AC, 700hp, can heal himself as a dhampir/Danse Macabre mythic hero), Camellia as a Cult Leader Warpriest (52AC, around 270hp) - both of them are selfish healers which suits their personalities quite well - Camellia would use positive fervor on herself as its a free action, while she used warpriest spells as self-buffs or to occasionally top up Vali on the off-chance he gets hit. I also ran Wenduag as a Divine Hound who could heal herself, and she was rarely taking damage anyway as an archer. Hard to do when you have a strong frontline. That meant I only had Sosiel to really worry about Regill and Nenio, and Nenio’s low hp isn’t a worry -- in theory, if Nenio is getting injured, then my tankline is doing something wrong or they’re getting through her Illusion buffs. Meanwhile, Regill is Regill - he’s a similar build to Vali (essentially has a modified version of the Armiger/Hellknight), can tank a lot and deal a lot of damage.

Sosiel might struggle with a lot of people being low - as I said, he can’t pump out the raw healing numbers like Daeran can - especially if they’re all squishy, but I use him as a “focus on buffs, protect the squishy wizard, top up everyone when they’re low” type and that worked quite effectively with both that Vavakia Vanguard and Areshkagal. And honestly, even if he wasn’t the best healer (again, he’s still better than Harrim), I’d still take him along anyway. That’s my best boy.

[kekoma]

— kageyama as your boyfriend.

milk boy🥛is typing... hope you enjoy.

milk boy only knows how to do 2 things.

find good yogurt/milk and play volleyball.

relationships? he doesn’t know what that it is.

ahh just kidding~

anyways, dating tobio? 

it’s definitely possible but you gotta have patients.

promise his mind isn’t always focused on volleyball and becoming the best— OR about milk based products.

tobio here developed a crush on you just like any other normal boy and of course he somehow made his way into a relationship with you.

but he did go over if his emotions for you are true or if it’s one of those moments where he simply finds you attractive and you’re starting to take effect on him beforehand. (different meanings here. iykyk)

has spent countless nights with you running through his mind and days where he finds himself daydreaming about you along with the cute things he wants to do with you as well.

after countless days that turned into a few months (just 2), tobio finally found himself acknowledging that his crush for you is real and he actually wants a relationship with you.

now the confessing part could go two ways;

a) he’s bold enough to tell you straight up “i like you and i want you to be mine.” 

or.

b) there’s no second option... he knows what he wants and that’s YOU so why sugarcoat it.

jokes again~

b) he’ll come to you with a blush and confess his feelings with something along the lines like; “please go out with me. if you’re free this weekend then i would like to take you out.” (if you look at his ears, bet they’re redder than his cheeks)

bonus choice c) you confess first and he can’t help but become super flustered. most definitely accepted your confession in a heartbeat.

boom! new couple alert. (that we stan and love)

although... in the beginning, the relationship was quite odd.

nothing too extreme that you’re like “damn... sir i’m five seconds away from ascending from how awkward things are.” 

but just know it’s... weird.

he never attempted any kind of skinship or did much of anything that was consider couple like.

it’s not because he wasn’t interested or anything, he just had to go over the pros and cons of showing it with you since nothing was discussed about it.

tobio’s constant thoughts were; “would it be okay to just go for it...? what if i end up getting slapped or punched. but if i don’t go for it then would i be a bad boyfriend? what if she wants to already and i just haven’t picked up the signs...”

literally spent some days just analyzing you just in case he really did miss any hints you gave and when he’s unable to find any (if you haven’t made the first move already) the first few weeks, you two showed no true notions of dating.

although he did make up for the lack of skinship by bringing a second yogurt drink and giving it to you.

“here.”

“hm? what’s this?”

“a drink. i may have brought a second one.”

“on accident or on purpose~?”

“do you want it or not..? b-because i can easily drink it without your teasing.”

“i’ll take it. thank you for being so sweet~”

“whatever.”

proceeeds to give his cute little pout while looking away.

although after a while he brings it up and you two discuss what’s allowed and what’s not allowed.

even then, he’s still bizarre about it because he’ll randomly grab your hand and hold it strangely or say out of no where “please... hold my hand.”

could really go on and on about the awkward stage but you didn’t come here for that.

so let’s discuss the relationship currently. probably been dating for a few years now.

100% more stable with no miscommunications about anything.

all the doubt and worrying about what’s okay is no longer evident on him and he’s actually more relaxed in a way.

but do expect him to be honest with you straight up now and he would like if you do the same from as well.

since you two have been together for so long, it’s only right to be completely honest anyways, yeah?

anyways kags is extremely— let me say it again... EXTREMELY caring towards you.

it’s not noticeable off the rip since he’s still going to be a bit closed off and sometimes pretend he isn’t huge softie for you, but the way he shows that he cares is through subtle things.

like picking up what you like, dislike, what kind of people you tend to avoid and/or tolerate temporarily, funny habits you’ve developed when you were younger and etc.

occasionally he’ll go out of his way to buy you something if you mentioned it and gifts it to you one day. 

you don’t even have to say ‘i wish i could buy this’. tobio either saw the item from your screen one day or you just so happened to have asked his opinion about it (with no true intentions of buying it) and he’ll remember.

there’s never a dull moment where he isn’t being attentive you.

yet something to point out is that his true personality is there still.

it’s just more water down and only makes a true appearance when someone decides to flirt with you.

vv protective and a bit possessive too.

tobio won’t right away put whoever is hitting on you in their place if it looks like you’re confident enough to handle it on your own.

but it’s quite easy to tell when he’s a little irritated by someone trying their luck with you due to the atmosphere around him (so dark).

however, if it looks like you’re extremely uncomfortable and can’t handle the situation then he’s already making his way towards you.

he’ll wrap his arm around you before telling the person off. sometimes you gotta stop him because he won’t hesitate to make them cry.

besides that; another part of his personality that occasionally makes an appearance in the relationship would be his short-temp.

which brings us to the topic of arguments because of that temp ties in with it.

not gonna say they happen often since they don’t and he constantly works on that part of himself for you (and himself).

but when arguments do happen, then tobio will end walking away from you to chill off if he feels that things are getting pretty heated since he’s capable of saying something extremely hurtful.

honestly he can’t stay mad at you long so when he’s back to normal then best believe he’s coming back to you and saying sorry.

even if it’s not his fault, he’s still going to apologize.

might take you out to eat/buy you snacks in hopes you’ll forgive him faster.

really tries his best to not let fights occur and may even try talking them out if he’s able to.

moving along~ 

if you expected this man to be an grade A flirt... it’s not happening.

no matter how long you’ve two been together, he hasn’t gotten the flirting aspect down to a pack completely.

but does he still try? of course he does. will he ever stop? probably not even if it’s embarrassing.

the only thing you can do is just accept it and like it. A for effort.

bonus: he probably asks his teammates about advice on flirting... just don’t be surprised when he uses one of the pick up lines he learned from noya and tanaka. 

def the loyal type.

if girls finally decided to notice him and shot their shot at him then he’s quick to shut them down.

could literally offer this man all the money in the world just to stop being loyal to you and he would decline.

we stan and love loyal boyfriend tobio <3

because of you, he does better in school. although he hated the thought of studying, he actually starts to love it since you’re the one teaching him and if you incorporate rewards (like a kiss or milk candy) then he’s completely down to work harder.

plus kageyama loves it when you praise him for making high test scores.

also want to add that he’s also the kind of boyfriend who’s interested in anything you like.

since you’re apart of what he likes, volleyball (if you decide to ask him about teaching you about the spot or just showing up to his games), then he’s always down to show interest and support for the things you like.

quickly let’s get into nicknames. top ones for you are 🥁🥁🥁  dummy/my dummy, babe, my love/love and chipmunk (don’t question the last one.)

pda. pda. pda. 

everything is the same in both the public and private department. he’s down with holding hands, kissing you, cuddling and something he LOVES doing the most with you is headpats.

don’t know why but he loves doing that and he also during lunch (and at home), he loves when you two are alone so he can finally rest his head on your lap and take a short nap or just generally lay there.

could go on about public affection too but let’s briefly move to dates.

dates with tobio consist of you bike riding, going out to eat, walks in the park, picnics and just generally anything cute but also simple.

literally treats you like a goddess and as much as i would like to make a whole essay about dating him— i’ll cut it short here.

tobio = best boy & best boyfriend.

© all content belongs to kekoma 2020. do not repost, modify or translate.

[raeynbowboi]

How to Play as Starfire in DnD 5e

After finishing my build for Raven, I figured it was time I go through the entire team and do their builds. I’ve done Starfire before, but I wanted to give her another look before moving on to the boys. And if there’s interest, I’ll also consider doing Terra as well. But before I can build the alien princess, I must first decide how best to incorporate all of Starfire’s powers into one build.

Star Bolts

First we must answer what exactly are star bolts? And the best that I can answer is that they are orbs of condensed energy, which causes them to radiate heat and produce light. When it comes to how to implement them we need to keep a few things in mind: 1. Star bolts are quick and easy, and she hurls them in succession. 2. They most likely deal Fire or Radiant Damage 3. They are primarily a means of long-range combat, though she can use them in close quarters. 4. They can be condensed into a beam, shot out of her eyes, gathered into a large star bolt for a massive bomb, or to enclose herself in a massive star bolt that expands in every direction from her to hit all nearby enemies.

RACE Scourge Aasimar. Your body radiates light energy that harms everyone, including you.

BARBARIAN Wild Soul. When the Wild Soul Barbarian enters their rage, one of the things that can happen is firing a beam of radiant damage, but this is on a table of rolls, so it’s only a good choice if your DM would allow you to only ever use that effect. But it still only activates when you enter a rage, and can’t be used otherwise.

Zealot. While it doesn’t specify shooting beams of light, the Zealot Barbarian can deal extra radiant damage when they attack. Make her an unarmed fighter and she’s punching people with radiant hands.

MONK Sun Soul Monk. This subclass can shoot blasts and beams of radiant damage while also being good at melee combat. The downside is that Monks use Wisdom, and realistically, Wisdom should be Starfire’s lowest stat. She’s gullible, trusting, and easily misinformed. It’s sort of the same reason, I’m not even considering Light Cleric. Plus, Raven is the healer. If Starfire has healing, it takes away from Raven’s role as the support caster. Fortunately the damage is calculated with Dexterity and not Wisdom, so if crossed with a Barbarian for instance, she can still get the unarmored defense, just picking the Barbarian’s DEX+CON over the Monk’s Dex+WIS. But even then, Starfire is really more of a Stronk than a Monk.

Four Elements Monk. Fangs of the Fire Snake can add Fire to your punch which can travel 15 feet, and it’s treated as a punch, meaning that multi-classing this with a Barbarian or a Fighter can really put your muscle and Strength score to use, which is better than the Sun Soul that works by Dexterity.

Spells Light Firebolt Sacred Flame Burning Hands Guiding Bolt Aganazzar’s Scorcher Scorching Ray Fireball Flame Strike Sunbeam Sunburst

Features Magic Initiate: The only requirement necessary for this feat is to know a spell. If you’re a race like Aasimar that comes prepackaged with spells, you can absolutely use this to get cantrips like Firebolt and cast it even as a purely melee build.

Super strength

Goliath Stone’s Endurance can help reduce damage taken.

BARBARIAN By building a pure Barbarian to level 20, she can have a STR score of 24, which is definitely above mortal STR caps.

BRUTE FIGHTER The brute puts even more muscle behind everything they do, and deals extra damage.

Manual of Gainful Exercise While it is an item, it’s one that can raise Stafire’s strength above superhuman levels

Odysseys of Theros: Supernatural Gifts (Variant Rule) Unscarred. Basically the same thing as Goliath’s Stone Endurance.

Odysseys of Theros: Piety Boon (Variant Rule) Piety 50 to Magis, God of Slaughter Piety 50 to Iraos, God of Victory Piety 50 to Hesiod, God of the Sun Piety 50 to Purphoros, God of the Forge Piety 50 to Klothys, God of Destiny All of these have the potential to raise your Strength score by +2 to a maximum of 22, though of them, Iraos is probably the most appropriate.

Flight

Races Aasimar (Protector) - limited Aarakocra Dragonborn (with feat) Winged Bloodline Tiefling

Subclasses Draconic Bloodline Sorcerer Divine Soul Sorcerer Phoenix Sorcerer - limited Storm Sorcerer - limited Vengeance Paladin - limited Eagle Totem Warrior Barbarian - limited

Spells Fly Otherworldly Form (grow wings)

Items Winged Boots Wings of Flying

For race, I did consider Goliath as a valid candidate, as it allows Starfire to lift, carry and push heavy objects, reduce damage from hits she takes, and allows Starfire to easily tolerate cold climates, which don’t bother her. However, Starfire’s primary role is as the party’s blaster, dealing damage is her bread and butter. It’s hard to overlook the fact that the Aasimar adds radiant damage to its spell and melee attacks for 1 minute (10 turns) meaning that from level 3 on, once per long rest, she can deal up to 30-200 extra radiant damage if combat lasts the full 10 rounds. That extra damage is hard to ignore, especially with how much it adds up in the end. The Protector Aasimar gets to deal all that extra damage, and fly as well to boot, so we’ll pick it for Starfire’s race.

As a warrior princess, we’ll take the soldier background for Athletics, and swap out Intimidation for Acrobatics. Then we’ll pick Intimidation back up and pair it with Persuasion from our Sorcerer skills list.

We do good for the sake of goodness, not for law or personal interest. We’re Neutral Good.

SORCERER Phoenix 

Channeling more of Starfire’s comic book origins, we’ll make our powers stronger through our emotions and personality, like a Tamaranean. As a Phoenix Sorcerer, we’ll add our Charisma mod to fire spells when we use our Mantle of Flames feature. You could consider the Phoenix Spark which brings her back into the fight to be her warrior fighting spirit giving her a second wind in combat. Nourishing Flame could likewise be a flavor of her supernatural toughness, giving her the strength to carry on. Finally, her Form of the Phoenix lets her fly when she activates her Mantle of Flames.

The most important stats for Starfire are going to be Charisma, which controls the power of her star bolts, her Strength which should defy mortal expectations, and her Constitution, to let her shrug off blows. However, the only way to make everything maxed is with manuals to raise her physical stats.

STR 20 DEX 10 CON 16 INT 8 WIS 9 CHA 20

Starfire’s Spells

CANTRIPS Control Flames Create Bonfire Dancing Lights Firebolt Friends Green-Flame Blade Light

1ST LEVEL Burning Hands

2ND LEVEL Aganazzar’s Scorcher Dragon’s Breath (reflavor as eye-lasers) Scorching Ray

3RD LEVEL Fireball Fly (self only) Melf’s Minute Meteors

5TH LEVEL Immolation

6TH LEVEL Investiture of Flame Otherworldly Form Sunbeam

7TH LEVEL Delayed Blast Fireball Fire Storm

8TH LEVEL Sunburst

9TH LEVEL Meteor Swarm

Variant Rule: Mythic Odysseys of Theros

Unscarred. When you take damage, use a reaction to reduce the damage by 1d12 + your Constitution modifier. You can use this feature once per rest.

Piety. Iroas, God of Victory

+3 Cast Compelled Duel equal to your Charisma mod per long rest +10 Cast Crusader’s Mantle once per long rest, and have advantage against being frightened +25 As a bonus action, no creature can get advantage against you for 1 minute per long rest. +50 Increase your Strength or Charisma by 2 to a maximum of 22.

Looking back on our build, we’ve done pretty well. We have 4 methods of flight avilable to us: Radiant Soul, Fly spell, Otherworldly Form spell, and Form of the Phoenix. Her power is also very commendable, as she’s able to deal a lot of damage. Unfortunately, she is held back by a need to have maxed out STR which admittedly gets in the way of improving her Constitution, or taking a feat. Speaking of which, Elemental Adept would be nice for such a one-trick pony, but her Alien strength warrants such a high score. If you know your DM will be a bit more liberal with the manuals of gainful exercise or the manuals of bodily health, you can afford to spend an ASI gaining Elemental Adept, or if you don’t care about her STR score and only want to focus on her role as a magical blaster, then max out her Constitution instead and/or pick up Elemental Adept so nothing can resist your fire. But Starfire  does what she’s meant to do, hit like a truck, shrug off injuries, and rain down righteous fury from the sky.

[kjissexy1994]

WORDS OF SHAKESPEARE: The Return of a very Supa Occasion! (Special guest: Richard)

On the 19th of June 2021, my old friend, Maiwel alumni and acting veteran Richard and I went to the Supanova Comic and Gaming Convention at Sydney Olympic Park in Homebush Bay. The 2021 edition of Supanova was the first time in two years that it was held in Sydney as last year’s edition was called off due to “You Know What” alongside Adelaide, Brisbane and Perth.

To implement with the health and safety protocols, the layout of the convention was more smaller and laid out to comply with physical distancing measures as well as entering via a QR Code.

When I first entered the Dome Exhibition centre seeing all of the convention goers and Cosplayers of superheroes, sci-fi and anime. I kneeled down and proclaimed “HALLELUJAH!” as many of the convention fans from NSW were starved of a taste of a full-on convention since the world went upside down early last year (Outside of the smaller edition of Oz Comic Con titled OCC POP UP which was held earlier in March of this year).

Supanova contained a teeming amount of Cosplayers from DC Comics and Marvel Superheroes, Rick and Morty, Steven Universe, Star Wars, Ghostbusters, Doctor Who and Power Rangers, Cosplayers from anime such as My Hero Academia, JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure, Naruto and Disney films including Mary Poppins, Mulan and The Little Mermaid, Cosplayers from Video games including Overwatch, Pokémon, Super Mario, Sonic the Hedgehog, Street Fighter, Resident Evil, Mortal Kombat, Cyberpunk 2077, Final Fantasy, Sonic the Hedgehog and Undertale, Cosplayers from Web animations for instance including RWBY, Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss as well as various furry Cosplayers and cosplays of my childhood such as Pingu. There was also a very innovative cosplay such as an attendee dressed up as a giant functional Nintendo Game Boy System! The costumes looked absolutely well designed and spot on as I asked kindly for photos!

A number of RWBY fans and Cosplayers noticed me wearing Jaune’s Pumpkin Pete Hoodie. I must admit, I’d make a pretty good Jaune cosplayer if I could get his armour, his “Crocea Mors” sword and shield and dye my hair blonde!

There was also the Cosplay stage across from The Dome where there was a competition for the very best and innovative costume, as well as seminars of the bigger name Australian celebrities.

Speaking of the celebrities, Due to the international borders being closed until either the middle of next year or when the majority of the population of Australia is vaccinated, Supanova relied heavily on home grown talent from our country for example (but not limited to) Manu Bennett, David Wenham, Josh Lawson, Kodi Smit-McPhee, Georgia Haigh, Nicholas Hamilton and frequent Supanova Attendee, John Jarratt who is famous for portraying the infamously ominous and frightening Mick Taylor from the horror movie franchise “Wolf Creek.” I still remember being scared straight to high heaven watching the movie when I was very young due to Jarratt’s portrayal of the heinous horror character next to Bill Skarsgard’s portrayal of Pennywise the clown in Stephen King’s IT Chapters one and two, but alas Jarratt was a very generous and friendly larrikin!

There was a lot of great activities to do including the “Black Widow Obstacle Course” where you had to complete a number of tasks within the time limit in order to win a prize, Star Wars Lightsaber demonstrations and tutorials and the “Battlecry” LARP (live action role playing) battle displays and demonstrations where you could fight your friend or one of the friendly Battlecry veterans such as Sammy Owen from the recent Medibank Commercial with a rubber sword or axe. This was a very great debut for my LARPING alter ego, “Boar-Head: The Sworded Brawler” and I am very interested in joining a Battlecry LARP group in the future!

There was a very colourful display of artwork, comics and prints at the Artists Alley, with various comic book artists from across Australia such as (but not limited to) Queenie Chan of Fabled Kingdom, Anthony Christou of Luminous Ages and Camillo Di Pietrantonio famous for illustrating the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IDW comics.

The Fabulous Wonder Mama also made a guest appearance as she is a superhero representing the LGBT Community.

The Artists Alley also had tables of independent artists selling comics, prints, bookmarks and badges available. Looking at the artwork made me feel like I was at an Art Museum for the fans of pop culture!

For those who want to spend some dough, there were also stalls selling new and vintage comics and trading cards, Pop Vinyl Figures, Animation cells from cartoons and movies of yesteryear, Action figures and gaming consoles from the eighties and nineties, LGBT pride flags, rock and metal band t shirts and apparel and Plushies from Japanese anime and video game franchises such as Pokémon and Digimon. There were also games to play such as Super Smash Bros Ultimate for the Nintendo Switch so fellow gamers can smash their friends out of the arena! For the con-loving geeks who were hungry, Dominos had a stall selling various flavours of pizzas and garlic bread and the canteens in the Sydney Olympic Park Dome sold fish and chips, bagels, sushi and coffee. Byron Beef Jerky also had a traditional stall selling all kinds of flavours such as Teriyaki, Chilli and the infamous “Devil’s Doo-Doo!” (Not for the faint hearted!)

Whilst Supanova Comic and Gaming Con in Sydney was a fun event for the inner nerds, parts of the con had to be completely modified and or removed in order to be healthy and safe for example, the discontinuation of handing out free goodie bags containing the guidebook and map of the layout of the con and other cool things making both the map and guide digital exclusive via the Supanova Website.

Another notable absence was the Australian Wrestling Federation wrestling ring where the pro wrestlers of the aforementioned promotion would host a series of three wrestling matches per day and the wrestlers would hand out free autographs, this really kind of hurt me as a fan of pro wrestling for sixteen years but it’s better to be safe than sick. At least the Battlecry LARP displays and demos filled in its place!

For the seminars, gone are the days of staff handing the microphone to the audience for the Q&A’s as they have to lineup behind the microphone in order to ask an interesting question to the guests.

I also didn’t like how some parts of the convention was a bit squashy when you first entered, in the artist’s alley and in some of the stalls. Like I said, we are in a receding health crisis and we need to wear masks, be physically distant, wash our hands and get the much needed vaccine shot against the you know what!

All in all, Supanova had a amazing return to full flight in Sydney despite the scare earlier in the week and the lack of International guests. I was starved of a full on convention throughout the year of misery last year and as a person on the autism spectrum, cons are such an amazing way to make new friends and to show out your inner geek, nerd,fanboy or whatever via cosplaying, gaming, greeting guests, purchasing artwork and so on and so forth all in a very safe measure!

I give this year’s Supanova in Sydney a 7 out of 10. This edition was absolutely different compared to last year’s and I have strong confidence that next year’s edition in Sydney and abroad will have well known and beloved international guests back to the much loved Comic and Gaming convention next year, just in time for Supanova’s 20th birthday!

Next time I am in Sydney, I will be going to the Vivid Festival which will be in August so stay tuned for that!

Happy trails!

K.J (Kane)

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms Far Side #2: Tohno Shiki

We have another guest build today from u/Magical-Biche on Reddit! While I’ve been tackling Fate Grand Order characters, they’ve been hard at work making builds for other parts of the Nasuverse. Today, they’ve built Shiki! No, not that one. Not that one either. No, Tohno Shiki. No, the other- you know what? Forget it, I’ll let Magical-Biche take over from here. (I’ll put the level-by-level breakdown below the cut, or you can check out the spreadsheet here.)

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Now that my personal favorite is done, today we’re attacking the main protagonist of that really good *anime* that is Tsukihime, Tohno Shiki. As with the previous build, this one will contain heavy spoilers for many routes of the visual novel. Read at your own risk! Also, this build works for Nanaya Shiki, just make sure you change the alignment from neutral good to like, chaotic or neutral evil. This build is based on Tsukihime, Kagetsu Tohya and Melty Blood. 

Tohno Shiki is a skilled demon slayer who fights with a knife. He’s merciless against his targets, as he falls into a trance while fighting them to tap into his latent potential. He can also use the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception.

For this build, we’re looking for 3 main things, which are : 

Shiki’s bread and butter, the mystic eyes of death perception. While there is no simple way of having the MEoDP, we’ll try to maximize our damage on a single hit, on a single enemy. 

Shiki might not look like it, but he’s extremely agile. While we have low health, we’re pretty hard to hit, and good at simply avoiding damage. 

Shiki has a weird fighting style where he’ll fall into a trance when he’s fighting certain enemies, such as demons and undeads. We might not be able to get that as a feature, but we can easily get bonuses against our favored enemies. 

Race and Background 

Shiki is a plain old human, fighting with only his own limbs. And his OP Mystic Eyes, but we’ll come to that later. We’re playing the variant human, as we have little use for more than 2 stats on this build, and we’ll be using that extra feat. Shiki fits the Urchin background… okay-ish-ly. He’s an orphan, but he grew up playing outside in a gigantic mansion. However, he did know Arihiko the delinquent for a long time, which means he certainly did some illegal things once or twice. Anyway, the proficiencies are great for the build, and the bonus feature fits our role very well. We’ll be taking the alert feat so we’re better at not being surprised and pretty much always hit first. We also get a skill proficiency, and we’re going for Survival.

Stats

Going with the standard array, we are going to need a few stats for our multiclassing. However, all three classes we’ll be getting levels in are Dex based, and 2 uses wisdom heavily, so we won’t spread too much. We’ll start by getting as high Dex and Wis as possible, as those will be our main offensive stat, and main spellcasting stat. Shiki is nimble and agile, and when he’s not obsessed over a target, he makes wise decisions. As is needed for a harem protagonist, he has a decent charisma, so we should get that stat to at least 13. Next, we have our little quirk: Shiki has bad health because of “Anemia”. In truth, he’s only alive because his sister gives him half her life force, which explains why he tends to pass out. He’s actually resilient, but for the sake of fluff, we’re going to let our Con sit at 12, not bad, but not great either. Next, we’re not particularly intelligent nor are we stupid, so we’re leaving our Int at 10. Finally, we can dump our Str. Who needs strength when you can cut anything easily?

Class levels : 

1. Ranger 1: We’re starting by getting our first favored enemy with a few levels of ranger. At level 1, we get our favored enemy. We are taking the Fiends. That gives us an advantage on survival checks to find them, and on intelligence checks to recall information about them. It’s not really strong, but it can always prove handy. Additionally, we can take the Abyssal language, which is common among demons, and fiends in general, to communicate with them. We also get natural explorer, which helps us move in certain environments. For the sake of flavoring, try to convince your DM to let you choose the “city“ terrain, which doesn’t exist in the rules, but simply makes a lot of sense. If they refuse, we can take Mountains, as we grew on a forest on a mountain. 

You also get Str and Dex saving throws proficiency. The Dex is awesome, but we dumped Str, so that one won’t be too useful. We will keep our leather armor for now, since we might die if we are too underprotected, but we’ll get rid of it later. Also, you could play with a single knife, to stay true to the character, but let’s say that a shortsword is basically just a very long knife, or else our damage will really be pathetic. We won’t use the bow, but it doesn’t hurt to have it as an option on the side. 

2. Ranger 2: We get our fighting style and our spellcasting. We’re taking the Duelist style, which makes us hit harder when we wield a single weapon. We will have plenty of use for our bonus action later, but for now, we can stick with dual wielding when the party needs more DPS. For our spells, we’re taking Hunter’s mark, which is the closest thing we have from the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception: it boosts damage and it helps us tracking our target, as if we could see its lines of death. We’re also getting Fog Cloud, which is an amazing tool for our hit and run tactics we’ll only get better at with levels. 

3. Ranger 3: We finally chose our archetype, and we’re going one on one master with Monster Slayer. This archetype gives us a new spell, protection from evil and good, a great defensive spell that even works on allies. We’re also getting Hunter’s sense, which is another part of our Mystic Eyes. It lets us see a creature’s weaknesses a few times per long rest. We’re also gaining Slayer’s prey, which boosts our damage just a bit further beyond. Next, we’re getting our primeval awareness, which helps us track our arch nemesis, the fiends, and other creatures too. 

The last gift level 3 gives us is a new spell to learn, so we’re getting Jump, to further boost our movement.

4. Ranger 4: Our first ASI, and we’re getting our Dex as high as possible to boost our AC and damage. 

5. Ranger 5: This is why we haven’t multiclassed yet: we finally get our multiattack feature! Now, we can really start doing some big damage despite our weak weapon. 

Also, we get a new spell from our archetype, Zone of truth. It’s a… niche spell, if anything. It can help with interrogations, but that’s about it. We’re also taking darkvision, which helps our poor human eyes with a LOT of encounters, because demons hunt at night, usually. 

6. Monk 1: We’re taking a very short detour into the monk class. We’re here for the unarmored defense, which can give us a very high AC later on, which is great for our survivability. We should sell our leather armor at that point, as it’s no longer needed. Also, we get martial arts, which let us do an attack as a bonus action with our fists, as long as our other hand is wielding a monk weapon. Our fists now deal 1d4 damage, plus our Dex bonus, which is actually weaker than our other shortsword. However, it makes it so that we can still do three attacks, with our multiattack feature, and keep the bonus damage from dueling. In the end, the lower base damage of the fist is mitigated by the +2 of our fighting style. The multiclassing into monk only gives us proficiencies we already have, which is unfortunate.

7. Ranger 6: We get a new favored enemy, the undead. It gives us the same bonuses as before against undead, which includes vampires. Since undead don’t have a dedicated language, we’re taking undercommon as a new language, since it’s a common language enough that Undead might speak or understand it. Undercommon, undead, maybe they’re related?

 We also get a new terrain for our natural explorer, so we’re getting forest or mountain (if you could deal with your DM to have the city terrain for your first level). It honestly doesn’t matter much, as we’re a city-dweller, so we should go with what our party needs there, really. 

8. Rogue 1: We’re getting our final new class this level, the rogue. A level 1 rogue gets Expertise, which makes us experts at 2 skill checks. We’re taking Perception and Stealth, so we’re less likely to be surprised and more likely to surprise. That puts us, if we did take the Standard array, a whopping +10 on Stealth checks and +9 on perception checks. We also get our big boi damage with Sneak attack, which let us deal an additional 1d6 damage if we have advantage on our attack, or when we have an ally in melee range of our target. We also get the Thieves’ Cant, which we won’t use much because of our lore. We get a new skill proficiency, acrobatics, as well as a proficiency with thieves’ tools. 

9. Rogue 2: We get our cunning action, our main hit-and-run tool, which lets us dodge or disengage with our bonus action. It does not sound that great, but it can really save us in some situations, we can’t forget we have that!

10. Rogue 3: We get our roguish archetype: we’re a Swashbuckler, to further our ability to challenge a single opponent. This subclass gives us Fancy footwork, which lets us play around our enemies freely, as long as we hit them. Great when combined with our multitude of extra attacks. We also get something else that’s great: Rakish audacity. This feature allows us to duel pretty much anything and still deal our absurd sneak damage. This makes it that we can always sneak attack creatures if no other enemy is near our target. We also get our charisma modifier added to our initiative, which is cool, but we already have our starting feat which gives us plus 5, so it’s nothing more than icing on the cake. Also, our sneak attack goes to 2d6.

11. Ranger 7: We do a last detour, now that we have somewhat stable damage and nice utility, to complete our Ranger build. We get our second archetype feature, Supernatural Defense, which makes us extremely resilient to our prey’s grappling and skill-check-triggering spells. We also get our last spell, which will be Silence, to help us sneak around.. You know, it’s almost like we’re a Rogue or something. 

12. Ranger 8: Our last Ranger level gives us an ASI, which will go to Dex, maxing our base damage and pushing our AC to 18. We also get our last Ranger feature, Land’s stride, which is niche but helps us not to be grappled by plant monsters and plant based attacks, as well as crossing even difficult terrain really fast. 

13 Rogue 4: The only thing we get this level is another ASI, which we pump into Wis, which boosts our AC and that’s it, as we have no spell which requires or triggers checks. It also helps tracking our prey, and boosts our passive perception through the roof. 

14. Rogue 5: UNCANNY DODGE! Finally, we’re starting to get our survivability to the next level. Just react to halve damage, once per turn. Yes, it’s limited to enemies we can see, but just look at our perception. We just know where everybody is. We can face tank the big boss’ big hit, if it manages to even hit us, or just survive one more turn a dumb arrow who managed to hit a 20 on the dice. What’s more, we get a shiny new sneak attack dice, pushing it to 3d6. 

15. Rogue 6: A new layer of expertise. We can grab expertise in Insight, which will help us find out if Arcueid really is Arcueid, or some weird theatre obsessed 500 years old vampire, and Survival, so we just won’t lose track of our prey. 

16. Rogue 7: We gain another extremely useful defensive feature with Evasion. It simply allows us to completely negate incoming fireballs, most traps and a lot of other stuff by changing how we take damage from those effects. Whenever we need to make a dexterity saving throw to halve damage, we take 0 damage on success now, and half on a failure. Nothing much to say, it just is as strong as it sounds. Our sneak attack goes up to 4d6.

17. Rogue 8: Fourth ASI, we’re getting our damage even slightly higher with the martial adept feat. We gain a superiority dice we can use to trigger either the Disarming attack, to have an even greater advantage on our poor opponent, or the Precision attack, in case we’re 1 or 2 away on the dice to hit our opponent in a critical moment. 

18. Rogue 9: next is our final subclass feature, Panache. It’s… not the greatest. We’re taking this level mostly because of the last feature we can grab, but using this feature can quickly become dangerous, no matter how evasive we are. It can fail, as we have low Cha, and Wis saving throws are quite frequent. We should only use it as a last resort. It can help us get our harem outside of battle though, so there’s that. Our sneak attack now deals 5d6 damage. 

19. Rogue 10: ASI time! This time, we’re finishing our Wis, that goes up to 19. Our AC is high, our perception checks are even higher, and we have huge bonuses to even skill checks we aren’t proficient with, like medicine. We have a +15 bonus to our perception, so no one really can hide from us anymore, no matter how sneaky. 

20. Rogue 11: Our final upgrade before going to beat the hell out of Tarasque. We’re reliably talented, which means we can’t realistically fail skill checks we’re proficient with anymore. In other words, we will always have a minimal result of 27 in Insight, perception, Stealth and survival skill checks, and a minimum of 21 in sleight of hand checks. Finally, our sneak attack dice caps at 6d6. 

Pros : We’re a big damage dealer, without even using precious class resources. As long as there’s one creature at the edge of the pack, we can use our Sneak Attack as much as we want, once per turn. We have pretty good stats, excluding our Constitution, which makes us weirdly tanky. Bad dice RNG can fuck us up, but we have a way to mitigate most damage. We’re also great at escaping thanks to being a rogue with access to jump, even though a few more Monk levels would have made us an escapist expert. 

Cons : We have pretty low HP thanks to only a +1 modifier on our constitution, so we’re not great at long fights. We pretty much have exactly one way of attacking, which is slashing, slashing and slashing. Investing in special enchanted weapons might be a must past a certain level. Also, our fist attacks are a bit useless outside of using them for Fancy Footwork. Finally, our damage can fall off quickly if the enemy attacks in large numbers. 

[noblecrumpet-dorkvision]

Orks (I mean, Scro) in D&D 5e

The party didn’t end up facing these guys in the paths they chose during our Tropos Quest Spelljammer one-shot, but I still wanted to share them. Now, I could have just used stats for regular D&D orcs and called them Scro (the spelljamming versions of orcs that, *ahem* “stand proud and erect, and their high foreheads resemble humanity's” ). However... that’s boring. And Scro don’t have any notable mechanics associated with them other than being “smarter orcs in space.” At that point, just use hobgoblin stats to imply training or give them pack tactics.

Instead, I made my Scro as tributes to the Orks of Warhammer 40k, with immense psychic powers but none of the brains to utilize them other than making their weapons work and causally manipulating fate. Here are the stats. Meanwhile, all these scro have the following trait:

Psionic Equipment. Scro choppers, firearms, and vehicles only work because they believe they do. In other creatures' hands, they fail to function. The only exception is when a scro weapon is used against a scro, but the wielder must make a DC 15 Charisma check for the weapon to have any effect. 

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Scro

Medium humanoid (orc), chaotic-neutral

Armor Class 17 (half plate) Hit Points 15 (2d8+6) Speed 30 ft.

STR 16 (+3) || DEX 15 (+2) || CON 16 (+3) INT 7 (-2) || WIS 11 (+0) || CHA 16 (+3)

Skills Intimidation +5 Senses darkvision 60 ft., passive Perception 10 Languages Common, Orc Challenge 2 (450 XP)

Aggressive. As a bonus action, the scro can move up to its speed toward a hostile creature it can see.

Wild Attacks. The scro makes attack rolls with disadvantage. However, any result of a 19 or 20 (before modifiers are applied) on either die counts as a critical hit, whether the attack hit or missed.

Actions

Chopper. Melee Weapon Attack: +5 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: 10 (2d6+3) slashing damage.

Shooter. Ranged Weapon Attack: +4 to hit, Range 80/240 ft., one target. Hit: 11 (2d8+2) piercing damage.

Stick Bomb (1/Day). The scro throws a bomb at a point up to 60 feet away. Each creature in a 20-foot radius must make a DC 12 Dexterity saving throw, taking 21 (5d6) thunder damage on a failed save or half as much on a success.

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Scro Boss

Large humanoid (orc), chaotic-neutral

Armor Class 17 (half plate) Hit Points 76 (9d10+27) Speed 30 ft.

STR 18 (+4) || DEX 15 (+2) || CON 17 (+3) INT 7 (-2) || WIS 11 (+0) || CHA 16 (+3)

Saves Str +6, Con +6, Wis +2 Skills Athletics +6, Intimidation +5 Senses darkvision 60 ft., passive Perception 10 Languages Common, Orc Challenge 6 (2,300 XP)

Aggressive. As a bonus action, the scro can move up to its speed toward a hostile creature it can see.

Wild Attacks. The scro makes attack rolls with disadvantage. However, any result of a 19 or 20 (before modifiers are applied) on either die counts as a critical hit, whether the attack hit or missed.

Actions

Multiattack. The scro makes two attacks, one with its Huge Chopper and one with its Big Shooter.

Huge Chopper. Melee Weapon Attack: +7 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit 18 (4d6+4) slashing damage.

Big Shooter. Ranged Weapon Attack: +5 to hit, Range 80/240 ft., one target. Hit 20 (3d8+2) piercing damage.

Burner (Recharge 5-6). The scro looses a 30-foot cone of fire from its weapon. Each creature in this area must make a DC 15 Dexterity saving throw, taking 21 (6d6) fire damage on a failed save or half as much damage on a success.

War Cry (1/Day). Each creature of the scro's choice that is within 30 feet of it and can hear it can use its reaction to make one weapon attack against a creature within its range. Then the scro can use its bonus action to make one weapon attack.

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Scro Psi-Boy

Medium humanoid (orc), chaotic-neutral

Armor Class 15 (breastplate) Hit Points 51 (7d8+21) Speed 30 ft.

STR 16 (+3) || DEX 13 (+1) || CON 16 (+3) INT 7 (-2) || WIS 11 (+0) || CHA 18 (+4)

Skills Intimidation +5 Senses darkvision 60 ft., passive Perception 10 Languages Common, Orc Challenge 3 (700 XP)

Aggressive. As a bonus action, the scro can move up to its speed toward a hostile creature it can see.

Wild Attacks. The scro makes attack rolls with disadvantage. However, any result of a 19 or 20 (before modifiers are applied) on either die counts as a critical hit, whether the attack hit or missed.

Actions

Multiattack. The scro makes two weapon attacks, then uses its psionics action.

Warhammer. Melee Weapon Attack: +5 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit 6 (1d8+3) bludgeoning damage if using one hand, or 8 (1d10+3) if using two hands, plus 7 (2d6) psychic damage.

Slugger. Ranged Weapon Attack: +3 to hit, Range 40/120 ft., one target. Hit 10 (2d8+1) piercing damage.

Psionics. The scro can cause one of the following effects, chosen at random (d6). The effects are magical. All saving throws have a DC of 14.

1 - Headbang: The scro casts dissonant whispers. 2 - Warpath: The scro casts bless. 3 - Jump: The scro casts dimension door. 4 - Fists: The scro casts enlarge on another scro within the spell's range. 5 - Crunch: The scro casts shatter. 6 - Roar: The scro casts fear.

------------------------------ 

Scro Warlord

Huge humanoid (orc), chaotic-neutral

Armor Class 17 (half plate) Hit Points 218 (19d12+95) Speed 40 ft.

STR 20 (+5) || DEX 14 (+2) || CON 20 (+5) INT 7 (-2) || WIS 11 (+0) || CHA 17 (+3)

Saves Str +6, Con +6, Wis +2 Skills Athletics +6, Intimidation +5 Senses darkvision 60 ft., passive Perception 10 Languages Common, Orc Challenge 11 (7,200 XP)

Aggressive. As a bonus action, the scro can move up to its speed toward a hostile creature it can see.

Wild Attacks. The scro makes attack rolls with disadvantage. However, any result of a 19 or 20 (before modifiers are applied) on either die counts as a critical hit, whether the attack hit or missed.

Actions

Multiattack. The scro makes two attacks, one with its Huge Chopper and one with its Special Shooter.

Huge Chopper. Melee Weapon Attack: +9 to hit, reach 10 ft., one target. Hit 26 (6d6+5) slashing damage.

Special Shooter. Ranged Weapon Attack: +6 to hit, Range 15 ft., any number of targets in a 15-foot cone emanating from the scro's weapon. Hit 15 (3d8+2) piercing damage.

Rocket Launcher (Recharge 5-6). The scro launches two rockets at points it can see within 120 feet. Each creature in a 15-foot radius of any of those points must make a DC 15 Dexterity saving throw, taking 28 (8d6) thunder damage on a failed save or half as much on a success. Creatures in the radius of two rockets' blasts have disadvantage on this saving throw.

Legendary Actions

The scro can take 3 legendary actions, choosing from the options below. Only one legendary action option can be used at a time and only at the end of another creature's turn. The scro regains spent legendary actions at the start of its turn.

Attack. The scro makes one weapon attack. Bark Order. The scro commands one creature that can hear it within 60 feet to attack. That creature can use its reaction to make a weapon attack. Rocket Jump (Costs 2 Actions). Each creature within 10 feet of the scro becomes affected by its Rocket Launcher action. Then the scro jumps up to 40 feet in any direction without provoking attacks of opportunity.

[n3rdybird]

Pilots and Penance

Star Wars

Poe Dameron x Reader

Prompt: I need a hug

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Depression and Angst

Written for @fictionalabyss​ 3K Celebration! Congrats!

The heat and humidity of D’Qar did little to warm your numb limbs.  You squinted as the light filtered into the hangar.  It had been a while since you had seen proper sunlight, your mission had kept you confined to nights on Coruscant.  Although known as a bright spot in the systems, the underbelly of the Galactic City was still rife with black market shops and smugglers.  Without the full support of the New Republic, the Resistance needed your contacts and knowledge of the less savory parts of the galaxy.  It was dangerous work, sometimes too dangerous.  If only you had-

You were brought out of your thoughts when a hand touched your shoulder.  You looked up to see the familiar face of the resident flyboy, Poe Dameron.

“(Y/N), the General is ready for debriefing.”

You felt the eyes of other Resistance members staring at you, you could feel their questions, their shock, their anger.  You straightened and nodded mutely.

------------------------------------------------------

In the middle of the night cycle, you found yourself in the showers.  It was quiet, most of the staff asleep, only a skeleton crew up and running essential functions. You weren’t sure that the numbness in your limbs was from the cold water blasting from the showerhead or the crippling guilt in your heart.

Was it your fault?

You heard the whispers ever since you arrived, semi-conned into joining the Resistance when the bounty you were chasing saved your life.  Even if you were vetted by the poster boy of the rebel group, Poe Dameron, who you were seriously regretting listening to.

“What’s a bounty hunter doing here?”

“She can’t be trusted.”

“Bounty hunters have no honor. She’ll sell us out to the highest bidder.”

And now the new ones.

“Bounty hunters only care for themselves.”

“She probably let him die.”

“She’s so cold, I bet she doesn’t care.”

“She just left his body there.”

You didn’t blame them.  You followed the mission.  When one of the Resistance members on your command messed up, it was on your head.  It had been an impossible choice.  Let one die to save the rest of your mission.  This was why you preferred to work alone.  You weren’t used to being responsible for others.  You weren’t used to having to make a call for someone else’s life.  You were a solo bounty hunter; rarely worked with anyone more than a contact, not wanting to share the reward.  And bounty crews were more trouble than they were worth.  Arguments about how the money should be divided, crews getting too large, having to go after bigger and better scores just to keep everyone paid well.  It was too much.  It was simpler on your own.  If you made a mistake, it was only your ass on the line.

The General didn’t seem to blame you, though you knew she took every loss to heart.  During the briefing, you went over the mission over and over again.  High Command went through your reports, trying to figure if there was a leak or traitor. If you were a traitor.  While it was to be expected, you tensed with every question.  You tried to keep your eyes from straying to the dark-haired commander of Black Squadron, waiting for him to step in, maybe even come to your defense.  But he was all “Commander Dameron”, not the friendly pilot who had wormed his way under your skin and bypassed your icy exterior.

You had been cleared of any misconduct officially, Jannak Kirhen died in the line of duty, but you did not feel any relief.  You slipped away from the main part of the Resistance base, keeping to yourself until it was well into the night cycle before you chanced a shower in the barracks.  You could have used the sonic shower on your ship, but that would mean going through the hangar.

You turned off the water and toweled yourself off, wincing as you accidentally pulled at the bacta patch on your side.  You peeled the corner, checking on the angry wound.  It was too deep for the patch alone, but it would hold until you got back to your ship.  You had a micro suture kit stashed somewhere, and you didn’t want to visit the medical unit.

After dressing, you made your way back to the hanger.  It was blissfully silent, even the mechanics who seemed to have a never-ending to-do list had retired for the night.  You crossed the bay to your ship, a modified stealth gunship.  You ran your hands against the cool metal and lowered the ramp.

“Don’t tell me you are sneaking out of here?” a voice asked.

You spun to see Poe Dameron behind you, BB-8 at his heels.  At Poe’s question, BB-8 beeped angrily at the thought, crossing in front of you, keeping you from stepping onto the ramp.

“Not leaving, though the thought did cross my mind,” you said curtly, stepping over BB-8 and up the ramp.  He followed at your heels to Poe’s amusement.

You dug through storage bins, ignoring the throbbing pain in your side and the burning gaze of the Resistance pilot.

“Are you going to talk to me?” he asked.

You scoffed.

“Now you want to talk? I was under the impression you were mute, especially during the briefing,” you snapped.

Poe sighed and rubbed his neck.

“I knew you didn’t do anything wrong.  I was afraid if I said anything, they’d think I was just trying to cover for you.”

His logic was sound.  Poe did spend an inordinate amount of time talking his way out of trouble.  But you still felt betrayed by his silence today.  This is why you didn’t do feelings.  It made things difficult and unreasonable.  You pulled the old kit from a box and tossed it to Poe.

“Make it up to me,” you said pulling off your shirt, leaving you in a breast band.  BB-8 whistled and spun around, giving you privacy.

Poe looked at the micro-suture gun in his hands before focusing on the scarlet-tinged bacta patch on your side.  He fished a pair of skin-gloves out of the kit and put them on.  He kneeled in front of you, prodding your skin.  You bit your lip as he peeled the patch away.

“Why didn’t you say anything? This should have been taken care of hours ago.”  He wiped away the weeping blood and cursed under his breath.

“Micro sutures might not be enough, especially with an older model like this,” he said as he tried to pinch the wound closed.  “We should go to the medical-”

“No.  We’ll do it here.  I can do it myself if I have to,” you said firmly, reaching for the gun if he wasn’t going to use it.

Poe looked up at you before nodding in agreement.  He scooted closer, his palm warm even with the sterile gloves.

“You don’t have any numb-spray, so this is going to hurt,” he warned you.

The suture gun let out a hiss for every stitch placed, and you gripped Poe’s jacket as each one went in.  It took 12 sutures for your wound to be closed.  Poe wiped the stitched skin and put another bacta patch on top.

“It’ll probably scar a bit, but it’s closed,” he said, pulling off the gloves and tossing them aside.

“Appreciate it,” you thanked him, and eased your tunic back over your head.  You felt Poe’s fingertips against the hem of the shirt as he gently pulled it back into place.

“So why did you have me mangle your skin, instead of having one of the medics take care of this?”

“Jannak, his husband is a med-tech.  And I came out of this mission with only a scar,” you said simply.

“So you’re punishing yourself?” he asked.

“I’m alive, and he isn’t.  I should never have agreed to take on a partner,” you confessed.  “I didn’t think he was ready.  He wasn’t ready for this.”

You blinked rapidly, swiping at your face with your hand.  Poe caught it and held your cheek.

“It wasn’t your fault, it wasn’t,” he said earnestly.  He leaned down, pressing his forehead to yours.

“I don’t think I can handle this,” you admitted, turning your head away.

“You can.  I know you can,” Poe said, taking a step back, moving his hands to your shoulders.

“I’m not made for this.  No one trusts me. They think I don’t care.”  BB-8 rolled over to your feet, nudging your legs affectionately.

“If you’d let them see you, the real you, they would never believe that.  You can let down your guard around others.”

You sniffled a bit, nodding.

“This is going to ruin my mystique a bit.  The tough bounty hunter has a heart,” you joked.

“Hanging around me, it’s bound to happen,” Poe said with a laugh.

“I should have never tried to collect your bounty.  I would be far away from here, not dealing with cocky flyboys and pushy astromechs.”

“Ah, but where is the fun in that?”

BB-8 whistled and bumped Poe’s legs.

“BB is right, this moment deserves a hug.  I need a hug, don’t you need one?”  He held out his arms welcomingly.

“Well, if BB-8 says so,” you agreed.  You kneeled next to the chatty astromech droid and wrapped your arms around his round body.  He beeped happily and spun around in a circle.

Poe pouted and crossed his arms.

“Aw, come on?  BB gets a hug and not me?  After I stitched up your side?”

“You’ve seen me without my shirt today.  A hug deserves a drink first.”

Poe’s eyes glittered in amusement.

“I can do that.”

[recurring-polynya]

I know I missed Renji's birthday but if you ever have time, I would absolutely love to see anything about Renji and Orihime's friendship. I always headcanon him as her no.1 weird bakery experiment supporter, but really anything would be great! They just seem like they would be each other's go-to supports and I would love to see your take on them!

Anon, I have no excuse for why this took so long! RenHime BroTP is one of my very favorite things, but I managed to draw a huge blank on this and then I went through two concepts that didn’t work before I managed to hit on one that did. (Also, I did write two other Renji & Orihime stories in the Time of Many Drabbles, one where they make a cake and one where they act out Orihime’s fanfic)

Anyway, I love the Advance Team Arc, please enjoy this Advance Team Arc story about Renji and Orihime trying to cheer Rukia up by going thrifting, ft. the all-time greatest Renji clothing item.

👖   🧥   💀

Orihime was headed outside for lunch, thinking longingly about her curry tuna fish sandwich, when a low, gravelly voice stopped her in her tracks.

“Oi, Inoue. You gotta moment?”

Abarai was leaning up against the wall of the school, his eyes scanning the school yard like he was waiting for a brawl to break out. Abarai reminded Orihime a lot of a guy in a prison movie. Not the guy that masterminded the prison break, but the guy who had the whole prison figured out and knew how to get illicit goods and would help the main guy escape even though they were sort of frenemies. Orihime found him a little bit scary, but in a cool way. They probably didn’t have motorcycles in Soul Society, but if they did, Orihime would bet money that Abarai would ride one.

“Sure!” she announced eagerly, and followed in his shadow as he silently rounded the corner of the building. He moved very quietly for such a big person, unlike Ichigo and Chad, who crashed and thumped wherever they went, especially when they went somewhere together.

“I gotta problem and I’m hopin’ you’ll be able to help me out a little.” Abarai shifted his shoulders a little, obviously uncomfortable in his school uniform.

Orihime knew all about the stresses of the undercover lifestyle. Clearly, he needed someone for an inside job, someone who knew all the subtleties of living a normal human existence. Fortunately for him, Orihime had been a normal human almost her entire life. “How can I be of assistance, Lieutenant Abarai?” she barked.

Abarai blinked at her. “Er. It’s not really mission-related. I need, um, some advice, I guess.”

Orihime set her jaw and tightened her fists. “I am short on life experience, but I have read many magazines. Ask me anything.”

Abarai waved his hands. “No! No! Look, you’re friends with Rukia, right?”

“Yes!” Orihime agreed. That was an easy one.

Abarai nodded quickly, happy to have found some firm footing at last. “The thing is, she’s been taking Ichigo’s vanishing act kinda hard.”

Orihime gave a tiny nod, her fingernails digging into her palms. The truth was, there was a dull, Ichigo-sized ache in her own heart, as well. She couldn’t stop wondering where he was and what he was up to and if he was getting good hearty lunches. She imagined it must be a thousand times worse for Rukia who had come all the way from Soul Society to just to see him.

“She gets real crabby when she’s worried,” Abarai continued on, continuing to scan the grounds, presumably for lurking Rukias. “She’s been getting on me for not having enough spare clothes for my gigai. I wouldn’t usually let her boss me around like this, but I thought it would make her feel better so I told her we could go, ah, shopping.”

“Oh, that’s so nice!” cried Orihime.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m a prince. But here’s the thing: Even though Captain Hitsugaya outranks me, I am technically the mission manager, which means I’m in charge of the budget, and I’d really, really like to come out in the black. Matsumoto already conned me out of a significant portion of the petty cash. I don’t think Rukia has a real good handle on human money and I sure as hell don’t. I told Rukia that we should ask one of her friends to come along and she said she’d ask you, and I just was hoping you could help me keep things, y’know, frugal, without making a big deal about it.”

Abarai looked a little sheepish even asking. Orihime remembered the size of Rukia’s house back in Soul Society, the beautiful kimono she had worn once she was no longer a criminal. Orihime knew all about having friends who had more money than you. Her resolve hardened and slammed her fist into her open palm. “A strict budget is no reason not to look your best!” she announced. “You have come to the right person, Lieutenant Abarai! I, Inoue Orihime, Thrifting Champion of Karakura, will help you out!”

Abarai’s face washed over with relief, followed very quickly by confusion. “The what champion?” he echoed.

👖   🧥   💀

“You are a saint, Orihime!” Rukia declared as they marched down the street, arm in arm, Renji trailing grumpily a few paces behind, his hands stuffed in his pockets. “A gem! I offered to borrow something from Ichigo’s father for him, but this ingrate was having none of it.”

There was some low-pitched muttering from behind them.

Orihime was trying to picture Renji in the pink, ruffled tuxedo shirt Dr. Kurosaki had worn under his lab coat the last time he set Tatsuki’s sprained ankle. “I don’t think Dr. Kurosaki’s style would be quite right for him,” she suggested diplomatically. “I… guess… he’s supposed to be a teenager?”

Rukia heaved a sigh. “I suppose you’re correct, as usual.” She craned her head back over her shoulder for a moment. “You owe Orihime an ice cream for this, Lieutenant Hopeless!” She swung her head forward again with a huff. Renji shot Orihime a wink.

Orihime couldn’t quite figure out Rukia and Renji’s exact relationship. Rukia has described Renji as “her friend.” On one hand, she hadn’t said about the shinigami from Ten or Eleven. On the other, she called Renji a lot of rude names and harangued him a lot. Renji had seemed pretty concerned about Rukia when he had pulled Orihime aside that afternoon, but now he was all slouches and scrunchy eyebrows. He reminded Orihime of Ichigo.

Oh! Maybe there was something to that! Maybe Renji was being a grouch on purpose so that Rukia could yell at him and feel like she was yelling at Ichigo. Wow! That was some master-level friendship. Orihime wondered if she should be taking notes.

“Ah, here we are!” she exclaimed, pointing at a little, tucked away shop front.

“What sort of shop is this?” Rukia frowned, examining the cluttered store window.

“It’s a thrift store,” Orihime explained. “People sell old, but well-made clothes to the shop, and they resell them for much cheaper than new clothes. Sometimes you can find really neat vintage, designer things that a rich person only wore a few times and decided they didn’t want. Uryuu likes to look for really ugly things made from nice fabrics and then re-tailor them. I have to modify a lot of my clothes, too, because of-- well, you know.” She gestured vaguely at her chest.

“What a brilliant idea!” Rukia proclaimed. “That’s so practical! Renji, isn’t Orihime a genius?”

“I didn’t come up with the idea,” Orihime mumbled self-consciously.

“Maybe you should open a shop to sell off your brother’s spare kimono,” Renji suggested airily. He was definitely baiting Rukia now, Orihime could see it when she watched for it.

“I should!” Rukia declared, closing her eyes haughtily. “People would probably pay twice just because he wore them!”

Renji just snorted.

👖   🧥   💀

“How about these?” Rukia asked, holding up a pair of jeans. “They look like the kind Ichigo wears.”

Orihime pulled her head out of the rack of pants she was sorting through, and Renji’s head popped up from the next aisle. “Hmm,” she said, tapping her finger on her lips. She knew what she wanted to say, but she didn’t want to make Renji feel self-conscious by talking about his body and also, she didn’t want to make it obvious how much time she’d spent looking at Kurosaki’s butt. “Those are skinny jeans. Abarai is a lot, um, more muscular? than Kurosaki-kun? He would do better with a straight leg cut, I think.” She wished Uryuu were here. She didn’t know that much about men’s clothes, but she had heard him say that once while lamenting Chad’s tragic commitment to bootleg cuts.

Apparently, Rukia had no such qualms about Renji’s positive body image. “Hear that, Thunder Thighs? This is where all those squats get you.”

If this bothered Renji, he didn’t let it show. “My thighs are majestic, Rukia. Some people enjoy a guy with a little meat on his bones, for your information.”

Rukia laughed then, a sharp, amused guffaw, almost a cackle. Orihime looked up suddenly. She was sure she’d heard Rukia laugh before, but it had been a high-pitched giggle, a girlish titter. There was a gleam in the shorter woman’s eyes, and at first, Orihime thought she was being mean to Abarai, but when she glanced at him, his eyes were twinkling and he had a slight smile on his face.

Orihime got the sudden sense that she was interrupting something, although she wasn’t sure how you could interrupt someone making fun of someone else. She ducked her head and focused on rifling through the rack of pants in front of her. “How about these?” she asked, holding up a likely candidate.

“Those look pretty worn out,” Renji frowned.

“They’re distressed, Renji,” Rukia explained pompously. “It’s human fashion. They come that way. It presents the illusion of leading a rough and tough, adventurous lifestyle, even for fancy boys like you.”

“Rukia,” Renji scolded her. “Members of the Sixth Company do not walk around with their knees on display, for anyone to see.”

Rukia snorted, and Orihime suspected they were making yet another inside joke. “How’s he gonna find out? And if he does, you can just tell him you fell down the stairs, he would definitely believe that.”

“Er, here’s another pair without any holes,” Orihime offered. “They’re black.” Uryuu also had a lot of opinions on black jeans, but she was pretty sure Renji could pull them off.

“Thank you, Inoue,” Renji said, extra-graciously, reaching over the rack to accept them.

“You better try them both on!” Rukia yelled in her bossy voice. “I demand to see the forbidden knees!”

“Whatever, you’ve seen ‘em, before,” Renji muttered, but he was still smiling.

👖   🧥   💀

“Hey, Inoue!”

Orihime ducked past a rack of sweatervests, to where Renji was contemplating a leather jacket.

“Do humans still wear stuff like this? I know they were pretty popular a few decades ago.”

“Oh, yes,” Orihime agreed. “It’s a timeless look.”

Renji looked mildly shocked, but happy.

“That’s a really nice one,” Orihime added. “You should try it on.”

Renji didn’t seem like he needed a lot of encouragement to slip it over his shoulders. “I had a roommate who had one of these,” he admitted. “They look pretty dumb over a shihakushou, but Iba has never once let looking like a moron slow him down.” He grinned. “I was jealous as hell of it.”

Orihime clapped her hands. “Oh, Abarai, it looks so good on you!” It wasn’t even an exaggeration. It was black, a classic motorcycle cut, and it fit him perfectly. Orihime amended her mental movie casting of Renji: in a jacket like that, he could definitely be the protagonist of an American motorcycle movie, flicking cigarettes into the gutter and leaving a broken-hearted girl pining after him after he got run out of town for Raising Too Much Hell.

“Is it expensive?” Renji asked, holding out the sleeve with the price tag. “I don’t know what a jacket is supposed to cost.”

“It’s a very practical wardrobe staple,” Orihime advised. “Especially this time of year. It’s just starting to be jacket weather, and this will carry you through until winter, unless we have an especially cold one.” She checked the tag. “Leather jackets aren’t cheap, but this is a very good value. If you can afford it, I think it’s worth it.”

“I think I can make it work,” Renji murmured, obviously doing a bit of mental math.

“Hey, Abarai,” Orihime said, leaning forward, and keeping her voice low.

“Eh?”

“Is it going the way you planned? Do you think we’re cheering Rukia up?”

Renji opened his mouth and then closed it again. “I think we at least took her mind off him for a bit. What do you think?”

Orihime contemplated. “She seems like she’s having a good time. I think she liked looking at your butt when you were trying on pants.” Renji raised a skeptical eyebrow. To be fair, Abarai had a very nice butt. Orihime was pretty sure she still preferred Kurosaki’s butt, but it hadn’t exactly been a trial. “On the other hand, she does yell at you a lot,” Orihime said quickly. “She’s very difficult to read.”

“Yeah, I know. It takes some practice,” Renji replied. “And she hasn’t been yelling at me. You haven’t begun to see Rukia yelling at me.” He rubbed his chin. “I think we’re doing a good job. Thanks, Inoue! I couldn’t have pulled this off on my own.”

Orihime blushed. “Oh, I haven’t really done anything!”

“I think you und--”

Orihime never found out what Renji was going to say, because Rukia came skidding into the coat aisle. She was wearing a denim vest, a feather boa, and a cowboy hat, and clutching something in her hands. “Hey! Hey, Renji! Renji, I just fou...nd…” She trailed off as her eyes scanned Abarai up and down, lingering on the leather jacket. Her mouth dropped open a little.

Orihime’s eyes darted to Renji, who looked paralyzed by this development. His hand went to his hair self-consciously, his fingers getting caught in his bandana awkwardly.

If Orihime had felt like a third wheel up until this point, she realized that sometimes bicycles can be very hard to ride if you aren’t used to them, and third wheels are helpful when you’re in danger of tipping over and crashing. “Rukia, look at the jacket Renji found! He’s being waffley! Help me convince him to get it!”

Rukia came back to herself suddenly. “It fits you perfectly, you fool! Listen to Orihime.”

“I dunno,” Renji drawled, having pulled his act together as well. “It’s kinda expensive.” He started to grab another coat off the rack. It was tweed and had elbow patches. “Might keep looking for a bit.”

“No!” Rukia commanded, and Renji’s hand reflexively dropped the hanger like he’d just touched something hot. Rukia cleared her throat self-consciously. “Speaking of things that are non-negotiable, look what I found for you!!” With a flourish, she unfurled the bundle in her hands, which happened to be a t-shirt.

At first, Orihime had no idea what she was looking at. Obviously, it was a t-shirt. If she had to guess, it had been printed by a garage band full of teens that played a lot of covers and had to bum rides to their gigs. There was a drippy looking skull and some words in English. It was objectively terrible. But in a charming way.

“I love it!” Renji shouted, with far too much enthusiasm. “I don’t read English very well, though, what does it say?”

“I don’t either,” Rukia admitted. “I think this says ‘red’, though.”

“It says ‘red pineapple,’” Orihime supplied. They had just finished the unit on fruits and vegetables in English class. She had gotten a 100 on the test.

Renji and Rukia both burst into gales of laughter.

“How much is it?” Renji wheezed. “I’ll pay a million kan for it.”

“They use yen here, you buffoon,” Rukia gasped. “It’s got an orange sticker, what does that mean?”

“That means it’s on special clearance,” Orihime explained, scanning the chart hung on the wall. “100 yen.”

“Ha, ha, that’s cheap! It’s mine!”

“You were skeptical,” Rukia lectured, wagging a finger, “But I told you, didn’t I, Renji? Orihime knows what she’s doing.”

Renji wiped a tear away from his eye. “Double ice cream for Orihime,” he agreed. “What would we do without her?”

Orihime’s face felt very hot. She waved her hands frantically. “Really, I didn’t--!”

“Also, remind me what ice cream is again.”

“You dummy!”

Orihime stopped protesting. Anyone who didn’t know what ice cream was definitely needed her help.

[susiequaz12]

Carrot Top- 13: Punished

I guess these chapters are getting progressively longer and longer. I think I’m okay with that. As always, my inbox is always open with any questions about the story/characters/world/tag list/etc, or if you just want to talk! So anyways, here’s part 13! (Side note: I didn’t expect to actually continue so far with this and have it have so many parts, but I’ve already got 18 chapters written and a whole storyline, so I guess there’s no turning back now.)

CW: (Finally a bit of fluff/comfort) not for long though, restraints, muzzled, dehumanization, captivity, non con touching (nonsexual), possessive whumper, blood.

Tag list: @imagination1reality0, @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi, @thehopelessopus 

The next 24 hours while Andrew continued to rest from Howe’s procedure were arguably worse than some of the previous times he’d been alone with Splice.

He was constantly bothered. 

After Splice had placed the muzzle on and left, Howe came in looking exasperated. He cut open the leg of his pants, and stitched up Andrew’s leg as best as he could before putting the boy back to sleep. When he finally woke up a while later, Splice came in just to torment him. He gave him another grammar lesson- removing the muzzle for a few minutes just to hear Andrew plead and beg out of fear. He would wait for the boy to give him the answers that he wanted before placing it back on his face again.

That happened several times. And by the third or fourth lesson, Andrew began to believe it. The words that he was forced to repeat echoed over and over in his mind.

He belonged to Splice.

He was an object to be used whenever, and wherever that he saw fit.

Because he deserved it.

- - -

When his chest had healed enough for Howe to remove the bands holding him down, the boy found that he still couldn’t move. 

It was as if his limbs didn’t work. They were stiff and achy from being stuck in the same position for so long, his body weakened and deprived. He let out a weak cry as he attempted to bring a hand up to his face. He barely got his wrist off of the table before the muscles in his arm gave out, crashing back down. 

The doctor placed a gentle hand on his back and lifted him up to sitting. Andrew whined through the muzzle as his muscles flared up, and his head lolled to his chest. Howe began to rub the feeling back into the boy’s arms, stimulating his muscles, making sure they still worked.

With the Doctor’s help, he guided the boy to the other side of the room. No doubt he would have carried him if he could, but the boy was at least a head taller than Howe. As Andrew’s toes met the floor, his legs immediately buckled under his weight. If it were not for the Doctor’s steady arm around his back, Andrew would have crashed to the floor. 

It took a few moments for the boy to regain some balance before they were able to move away from the table. Andrew limped drastically, putting most of his weight on one leg, and the doctor, as he shuffled and dragged his feet trying to keep himself upright. 

Howe helped him change into some cleaner cotton pants- the same grey capris from earlier- and pulled a thin, white t-shirt over his head. He sat the boy down on the edge of the soft bed he had initially been placed in when he first met Howe. 

Andrew immediately sank into the softer material. It was much nicer than the examination table- far more comfortable. It had soft sheets, and a thin blanket with an old pillow, but it was comfortable. 

To Andrew it felt like a cloud. Like he was floating. 

He let his body fall into the soft bed as his muscles collapsed underneath him, letting the material of the mattress contour to his aching body- cradling him in the comfort. He didn’t put up a fight or a struggle when Howe restrained his ankles to the bottom of the bed. 

The boy curled over on his side, tucking his hands to his chest as the blanket was pulled over top of him. 

He huffed a small sigh of relief and comfort as he nuzzled his head up against the pillow.

He’d cherish this while he had it, because he knew it wouldn’t last long.

- - -

When Andrew was healed enough to no longer need the constant watchful eye of Howe, he was moved to a cell. 

Well, they called it his room, but it was essentially a cell. 

It was kept inside of the nicer part of the building, the part that connected to the lavish mansion that Splice lived in. Andrew could tell that it was originally meant to be an office, a storage room or something. But all the walls were bare- there were no windows, no outlets, or a lightswitch or anything. The only thing inside the room was a small closet in the corner furnished with a toilet, a cot with a single blanket, and a bench on the opposite side of the room. 

Everything was bolted into the tiled floor.

The door was always heavily bolted from the outside, and guarded with at least two people. Andrew was monitored whenever he left the room, and whenever he came back. It wouldn’t surprise him if there were cameras hidden in the small room as well. 

It had been three days since he’d been moved from that medical room. 

And once he’d realized he’d been here over a week, he knew no one was coming anytime soon. 

His friends were mad at him, surely. 

He’d gotten into a fight with Justin before he left, and it was all his fault. Ali would surely take his side.

All he could think was that if he hadn’t gotten mad at them, hadn’t wandered off on his own, he wouldn’t be here now. 

So Splice was right. 

He deserved it.

Andrew laid on his back on the cot. He had his feet wrapped up in the blanket, the rest of him exposed. His feet were always cold. He wouldn’t dare to ask for something as small as a pair of socks. 

Maybe he could ask for a book or something. Or even a pad of paper- he’d been thinking of taking up drawing again. It was something he was really into during high school, but he’d lost it over the years. 

He just wanted something simple to fight the boredom. 

Something to fight against the monotony. 

Wake up, eat, endure through whatever the heck Splice felt like doing that day, eat again, sleep. And repeat. 

Most days were filled with examinations. He sat in a room filled with “doctors” (the fake ones that Howe had talked about), and was poked and prodded and violated and examined and tested on. 

After all, that’s what Splice did here. He captured their kind, people with their abilities, to examine and experiment on them and see how they worked. 

And then he used those experiments to genetically modify their abilities. 

Some days when Splice got upset, he would take it out on Andrew. There was never a moment the boy went without pain, or discomfort. Constant fear, anxiety, and trauma, invaded his new day-to-day.  

A knock sounded on the door.

Here we go again.

Splice sauntered into the room, carrying a small plate and a glass of water. 

“Good morning carrot top!”

The boy immediately scrambled back into the corner of the wall upon seeing the man but quickly stopped himself.

Splice chuckled. “One of these days you’ll stop acting so scared when you see me. Do I really frighten you that much?”

Andrew paused. Should he answer? The man had taught him many things while he had been there. The consequences that came from talking out of turn had been one of them.

“N- no sir. Sorry sir.” He lowered his head towards the bed and tried to steady the shaking in his limbs as the man stepped closer. He sat on the edge of the bed and held out the plate.

“Eat up. Come on now.” 

Andrew tentatively took the plate. A single piece of toast with a protein spread on it. He gingerly took a bite and kept his eyes down as he chewed.

When he finally managed to choke down his breakfast, the man handed him a glass of water, which he gratefully drank.

Splice removed the blanket from his feet and unattached the chains that kept him tied down to the cot. On shaky legs he managed to rise and move to the closet in the corner to use the bathroom. When he was done, he limped back to the bed and sat down on the cot.

Splice reached into the inside pocket of his suit coat and pulled out Andrew’s least favorite part of the day. 

The muzzle.

The foul thing was taken off while he slept and while he ate. Other than for those few times, he was constantly forced to wear it.

He saw the thick leather coming towards his face and imagined the bit in his mouth. All he could feel was it suffocating him, trapping in his breath and his words. Making it hard to swallow, forcing him to choke on his own blood, and vomit. He was sick of wearing it constantly. He wanted to be able to speak he wanted to breathe freely, he wanted to-

“--no.”

The word came out before he realized what he had said. He clamped his hands over his mouth and shook his head. The tears already poured down his face as Splice recoiled in shock.

“What. Did. You. Just. Say?” 

The boy kept his hands over his mouth as he mumbled. “I- I’m sorry, msorry- I shouldn’t hve, I- I didn’t please- please, sir, I-”

Splice threw the plate and cup down to the floor where it clattered. The boy flinched. 

“Did you tell me no?”

“I’m - I’msorry I’m sorry, please don’t- I- I”

Splice grabbed the boy’s wrists in one hand and pulled him off of the bed to his feet. He stood on shaky legs, most of his weight leaning to one side.

“Kneel.” 

The boy surprised himself with how quickly his knees hit the ground. He winced as pain flared up his leg- the one that had been stabbed through a few days ago.

“Who do you belong to?” 

Andrew sobbed. Wrists shaking as they were held up in front of him like a forced plea. He leaned forward and put his head in his own hands. 

“You- I- I belong to you.”

“Good.” Splice stated. His other hand went to the back of Andrew’s hair. He pushed the boy’s head into his own chest as he knelt on the floor in front of him. He kept a grip firmly on the boy’s wrists as he stroked the pale hair. The hair that had once been colored with fire, just like the boy’s attitude only a few days ago.

“Now, what did you do wrong?”

Andrew’s chest shook with a sob. 

“I- I said no.”

“Good, and?” Splice prompted.

“And I- I spoke out of turn. I didn- didn’t do what I- what I was s’posed to.”

“Good.” Splice shuffled forward on his knees. The boy leaned backwards to accommodate and Spliced inched further as he did so. 

“You didn’t do what you’re supposed to, exactly.”

He kept a grip on the boy’s wrists and on the back of his hair as he moved forward, pushing the boy down until his back was forced to the ground. 

Andrew’s eyes got wide out of confusion and he let out a small whimper as he untangled his legs out from underneath him to lie flat on his back.

“Can you tell me what happens when you don’t do what you’re supposed to?” Splice moved his hand from the back of Andrew’s hair to the collar around his neck. Once again marking his ownership with a simple piece of fabric.

Andrew choked on his words. Knowing the answer but not wanting to say it. “I- I get- I get punished.”

“Very good.” 

Andrew barely noticed as Splice pulled the small knife out of his suit coat. 

He only noticed when it began to dig into his arm.

He flinched out of instinct to try and move away and Splice tsked under his breath,

“Oh no, hold still now. You can be good, right?”

Splice let go of the boy’s hands and rearranged himself so he was no longer kneeling besides Andrew, but on top of him. One knee pinned his left shoulder down, while the other straddled his opposite side, forcing his arm to the ground.

“You can be good- right?”

Oh no- Splice had to repeat himself, the boy thought. That was bad, he was going to get angry, and when he got angry he would be punished again, and being punished hurt- and he couldn’t, he didn’t want-

The boy nodded, shaking his head eagerly, tears filling his eyes. He wanted to be good. He needed to be good because if he wasn’t- then-

Andrew winced and clenched his eyes shut as he felt the same cold hands on him.

Splice used one hand to push up the sleeve of his thin t-shirt, and pressed the boy’s shoulder into the floor. The other gripped the knife, and began to start where he had left off.

The knife dug into the top of his arm, near his shoulder. 

Andrew whimpered through his teeth. He kept his eyes tight and his breaths shallow, but he did not scream. 

The blade traveled down, down through his bicep, stopping halfway between his shoulder and his elbow. The blood seeped out, warm and sticky as it dripped onto the floor around him. 

The knife left the cut and Andrew breathed out a sigh of relief. His neck arched back, chest rising in pain as it entered his skin again, only an inch away from the first cut. He clenched his teeth and tried to breathe, but with the weight on top of him, and the pain rushing through him, it seemed nearly impossible. 

Finally the knife left and he opened his eyes to see the knife in front of his face.

“Think of these as tally marks.” Splice stated. Andrew’s eyes remained deadly focused on the knife in front of his eyes. “One, for saying no. And another one, as a reminder.” 

The flat side of the blade pressed into Andrew’s cheek and wiped across his face. Andrew closed his eyes, heart pounding at the anticipation of pain when he felt the cold metal across his other cheek. The rest of his own blood from the knife was wiped off onto his face. 

He winced and his eyes shot open as a hand wrapped around the top of his arm. He struggled to stay quiet, struggled to breathe as the pain shot through his arm. But as Splice squeezed the muscles in his arm, he couldn’t help it.

A strangled cry erupted from his mouth followed by a bottled up scream. 

“A reminder to do as you are told. A reminder that you no longer make your own choices. Understand?” 

Andrew nodded through his scream. 

“Do you understand?” 

A nod wasn’t good enough.

Andrew breathed through the pain. Hissing in air through his teeth. Splice gripped his arm tighter.

“I- I arrgh! I- ah- I uh-understand.”

“Good.” 

Splice released his grip and patted the side of the boy’s face, leaving a bloody handprint on his cheek. He reached and ruffled through his hair, leaving it sticky and matted with his own blood.

The knife wavered tauntingly in front of Andrew’s eyes. “You know, I quite like the look of blood on your face. It suits you.”

Andrew shut his eyes as the tip of the knife poked into his forehead, and then trailed around his temple, down to his jawline. It left a faint trail of blood through the skin that mingled with the rest that had been smeared on his face.

 Splice stood up, leaving the boy lying on the floor. He picked up the plate and cup that he had thrown earlier and put the bloody knife back in his pocket.

Placing a hand in the middle of Andrew’s back, he helped him sit up and put the muzzle on his face. Andrew sobbed through pain and embarrassment, but he did not struggle or fight back. He allowed the man to buckle the leather behind his head, a little tighter than usual, and his sobs and cries were cut off as the bit sat tightly in his mouth once more. 

“Come on now, don’t cry. You want to be good for later tonight. The doctors have a new drug they want to try, and you better be the perfect patient.”

[tigerkirby215]

I’m a particular fan of wasting my time so I decided to rate all the Half-Feats for no real reason

(Artwork from the Acquisitions Incorporated 5th Edition sourcebook, because I can’t just use artwork from Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything.)

If you have been around my blog for any lengthy period of time you will know two things about me.

I often fall into flights of fancy mostly under the guise of attempting to branch out with this blog, even though the real reason is that I wish to publicize any and all work I do for this hobby.

I really like half-feats.

And who could blame me (at least for the second point.) It’s always exciting when you can get a feat, and half-feats allow you to round out a stat of your choice while still allowing you to diversify your character with unique abilities to make them your own. Feats are always strong and even the most basic half-feat still provides you with unique traits to differentiate yourself from the standard adventurer. But it can be hard to choose when they are all so diverse which is why I’m making this list for myself and anyone who may find it useful.

I would also like to thank LudicSavant from the Giant in the Playground forums for their organized list of Half-Feats. It has made the creation of this list far easier and I frequently reference it when making builds.

WHAT IS A HALF-FEAT?

For the sake of understanding (because the last time I used the term “half-feat” on Reddit a lot of people got confused) I will define a half-feat here: A half-feat is any feat that gives half of an ability score improvement (+1 to a given stat) along with its regular features. They are obviously good choices for any player with an uneven stat, as they can make that stat even (for the increase in ability modifier) while also gaining an additional bonus.

HOW IS THIS LIST ORGANIZED

This post is split into 6 sections, one for each stat. (Strength, Dexterity, Constitution, Intelligence, Wisdom, Charisma.) The feats are organized in alphabetical order. Basically I’m lifting the formatting from LudicSavant.

Each feat will be shown as follows:

FEAT NAME

Description

Summary

Rating

Feats that can be applied to varied ability scores will be mentioned multiple times, however unless the feat changes based on the ability score chosen the entry will simply be shown as a redirect to where it was summarized earlier.

And I guess it also has to be said: This list is just my opinion and is in no way an objective ranking of the half-feats that currently exist in D&D 5th Edition. Feel free to make your own decisions when designing your character: this post is merely meant to share my opinion and provide a reference resource for people making characters.

(Artwork still from the Acquisitions Incorporated 5th Edition sourcebook. Damn this book has some nice artwork.)

STRENGTH

Athlete

Grants you the ability to stand up from prone faster, climb more easily, and jump further.

You’d think with the amount of builds I’ve included this feat in I’d have more positive things to say about it. But no: this feat is trash. Climbing is rare and jumping is pretty much never used in D&D. Even if it was there are low level spells (Spider Climb / Jump) that allow you to do what this feat does.

The only really useful addition to this feat is the faster speed to get up from the prone position. Being prone sucks and it can heavily restrict your movement when it happens. Putting yourself prone is also helpful in a ranged build to give enemies disadvantage to hit you from range. (You can technically knock yourself prone after attacking to make it harder to hit you.) But this strategy loses effectiveness quickly and it isn’t worth taking a feat to combat the rare possibility of being knocked off your feet.

Ultimately if you genuinely see any of the features of the Athlete feat as being useful chances are that either your DM forces way too much jumping / climbing, really likes knocking people over, or you really like knocking yourself prone.

2/10

Crusher

Grants extra utility to bludgeoning weapons, allowing you to move foes into more favorable positions.

RIP in piss Monks am I right lads? To be fair there aren’t any Finesse Bludgeoning Weapons with the only exception being the Sling. But regardless: this feat has two features along with its Ability Score Improvement:

The pushing ability is situational at best. Displacement abilities in 5th edition rarely have a significant impact. You may push an enemy off a cliff on occasion but unless your DM makes a significant effort to present these opportunities to you it won’t come up often. There is some niche use for this feat to work as a poor man’s Mobile feat, as you can push a foe back 5 feet before running away without needing to disengage.

But perhaps the biggest problem with the displacement ability of Crusher is that Shield Master does everything it does almost objectively better, all while providing additional benefits to Dexterity saving throws. Shield Master isn’t a half-feat, granted. But one could get one of the better +1 feats to STR / CON along with Shield Master.

The effect on a crit is incredibly potent. Giving all allies advantage to hit a foe will lead to more damage being dealt and an even higher chance to crit. However relying on crits usually isn’t a smart idea, and crits are already deadly enough without a feat to boost them.

7/10

Dragon Fear

DRAGONBORN EXCLUSIVE FEAT

Allows you to roar with your Breath Weapon ability, frightening nearby enemies.

This feat singlehandedly makes Dragonborn viable. I’m not even joking: being able to replace your CON based, low damage Burning Hands-lite with essentially the Fear spell which comes back on a Short Rest and is based on Charisma is insanely useful for any Charisma character. The most obvious use is for the Charisma casters: Bards and Sorcerers can get an extreme amount of value from this feature. But other Charisma classes like Paladins, Swashbuckler Rogues, and any other class that requires Charisma can use it well. Warlocks get a little less use out of it than most since their abilities already come back on a Short Rest but it’s still nice to have in your pocket.

It’s less useful for non-Charisma classes but it can’t be flawless. But it removes the problem of choosing between a subpar AoE damage ability or just attacking with your weapons / spells, and instead gives you a utility ability to give yourself space. It doesn’t scale well late when most enemies resist fears, but neither did your breath weapon. Especially with the Dragonborn subraces from Explorer’s Guide to Wildemount this feat is extremely good.

I mean, you could just play a Leonin and get the fear without investing in a feat, especially since Tasha’s lets you move ability scores around. But Dragonborn have more fun roleplay and other abilities that the Leonin lack.

10/10

Dragon Hide

DRAGONBORN EXCLUSIVE FEAT

Your AC is equal to 13 + DEX and your unarmed strikes do a d4 + STR damage.

The Mage Armor feat / the worse Tavern Brawler feat. What confuses me about this feat is how at-odds it is with itself. On one hand your AC is still based on DEX but on the other hand your natural weapon is based on STR?

Let’s just ignore the Unarmed Strike damage because let’s be real here: you can just pick up a dagger instead of slashing people with your dragon claws. Is Mage Armor really worth losing half of a feat? If you have nothing better maybe, but this list alone shows that there are better options. There are some very specific niche scenarios where Unarmored Defense is more valuable than actual armor but those scenarios are usually campaign-specific or a choice done more for roleplay, and you could just as easily accomplish the roleplay by taking the Magic Initiate feat to get Mage Armor along with two useful cantrips.

Honestly this should’ve just been added as a base feature for the Dragonborn, and most DMs I know give this feat to Dragonborn at level 1. (Minus the half feat ASI.) Lizardfolk have innate AC, crafting skills, and a healing bite; Dragonborn should get innate AC, damage resistance, and a crappy breath weapon that can be upgraded by the Dragon Fear feat.

3/10

Heavily Armored

Gain proficiency with heavy armor.

The vast majority of classes that are expected to wear Heavy Armor have Heavy Armor Proficiency. In fact the only Martial class that doesn’t have Heavy Armor proficiency (minus Barbarians and Monks who can’t wear Heavy Armor) is the Ranger, so this feat is good if you want to play a Ranger like a Paladin. Huhn. Ironic that I am playing a Horizon Walker Ranger like a Paladin in one of the campaigns I’m in.

(Artwork by Bo “chenbowow” Chen. Made for Riot Games.)

Like, you can grab this feat for Clerics and Druids I guess, but why would you? Medium Armor is on-par with Heavy Armor, and 14 DEX is far more useful than the 15 STR required to wear Platemail.

The only other two (well technically three) subclasses I can think of which could grab this feat are the Hexblade Warlock and the two Martial Bards. (College of Swords / College of Valor.) For Hexblade... why do you need Strength? You can swing your sword with Charisma. Bard however... I guess if you want to play a Strength Bard it’s an option?

But yeah: the only time I ever used this feat was to play a Ranger like a Paladin. And saying “I used this feat to play one of the worst classes in the game like a better class” isn’t exactly an accomplishment.

1/10

Heavy Armor Master

While wearing heavy armor, bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing damage that you take from nonmagical weapons is reduced by 3.

The word that kills this feat is “nonmagical.” I can tell you as a fact having had a Fighter use this feat in a level 1 - 5 campaign that it is TORTURE for any DM. “Oh boy I finally hit the 20 AC Fighter annnnd I did 5 total damage, even though I rolled max damage.”

But this feat literally becomes useless past level 8 or so when enemies start getting magical weapons. There are a few enemies that still technically do nonmagical damage at high levels, but even then this feat isn’t going to save you from foes that are normally doing upwards of 15 damage per swing. It adds up yes, but it’ll rarely add up in my personal experience.

Take this feat on a Variant Human at level 1 if you’re doing a level 3 one shot, just to be an asshole.

2/10

Lightly Armored

Gain proficiency with light armor.

?????

Mage Armor exists. The only classes in the game that don’t get proficiency with at least Light Armor are Sorcerer and Wizard. You can afford to lose a spell slot for Mage Armor. Seriously.

1/10

Moderately Armored

Gain proficiency with medium armor.

The best of the “armored” feats because (hot take time) Medium Armor is the best armor in the game. It requires the least investment which makes it the most easily accessible armor in the game. If you have a 13 in DEX I’d highly recommend grabbing this feat. If your DEX is at a 16 (+3) or higher I’d honestly maybe just recommend Light Armor / Mage Armor instead?

8/10

Orcish Fury

HALF-ORC EXCLUSIVE FEAT

Get the ability to choose to roll an additional damage die once per short rest. Additionally, you can use your Reaction to make a weapon attack after being knocked down to 1 HP via your racial trait once per short rest.

Anyone find it amusing that this feat is only available to Half-Orcs but not full Orcs? Anyways: having the ability to essentially crit on-demand is nice. Having the reactionary attack after being knocked to 1 HP is situational, but still alright. I think if I was playing a Half-Orc and I needed to round out either my Strength or my Constitution (more likely my CON since there are far better feats for STR) I wouldn’t be upset taking this. Is it worth playing a Half-Orc just for this feat? Not by a long shot lol.

6/10

Piercer

When you deal damage with a piercing weapon you can reroll one of the damage die on one attack per turn. When you crit you can roll an additional damage die.

Savage Attacker as a half feat, proving that Savage Attacker is a bad feat lol. I’m actually going to talk more about this feat when I go into the Dexterity section which makes this the first feat where I’ll actually rank it lower for a specific Ability Score.

3/10 (if using STR)

Resilient (STR)

Gain proficiency with Strength saving throws.

Strength saves are common and pretty bad, but not as bad as Wisdom or Dexterity. What’s more is that most classes that will be forced to make Strength saves have proficiency in Strength saving throws already. If you have an uneven Strength score this isn’t the worst way to round it out, but I’d sooner get a stronger feat for another ability.

3/10

Revenant Blade

Essentially Dual-Wielder for the Double-Bladed Scimitar.

A very specific feat to the Eberron setting, and even though I use Eberron content frequently in my builds I’ll be honest: I know very little about the setting. The DBS honestly just seems worse than uh... wielding two scimitars? 3d4 damage is about on-par with 2d6. This feat is something you take more for roleplay than actual practicality with your character, though I have played with people (outside of Eberron lol) using a double-bladed scimitar and it seems like a cool weapon. Dual Wielder is also a good feat and it seems you can use the DBS without grabbing the Dual Wielding Fighting Style.

5/10

Skill Expert

Learn a skill and gain expertise in a skill.

A very good skill to round out any build. Expertise can actually shape your character quite a lot, as it allows you to be good at things even if your Ability Scores are bad. A good go-to feat to round off any uneven Ability Score if you have nothing better imo.

7/10

Slasher

Slashing weapons lower the speed of the target hit by 10. On a crit the target has disadvantage on all attack rolls until the start of your next turn.

Easily the worst of the weapon damage type feats, which is a shame because I like slashing weapons. The slowdown effect is rarely useful: the only class which I really think can use the slowdown effect well is hit-and-run Rogues, but Slashing weapons are heavily restricted from Rogues for some reason. The crit effect is nice but you shouldn’t be banking on crits, even as a Champion Fighter. This feat at least has a niche if you plan to play a Whip Rogue but that’s about it.

3/10

Squat Nimbleness

Increase your movement speed by 5, gain proficiency with Athletics or Acrobatics, and gain Advantage to escape grapples.

It is actually goddamn hilarious how good this feat is. +5 movement is already nice (especially if you’re playing one of the later-added small races [or a Homebrew race] that has 30 feet of movement) but you also get a free skill proficiency in either of the two most commonly used skills in the game, and to top it off to my knowledge this feat is the only way to gain a bonus to escaping grapples. (Outside of like, the Freedom of Movement spell.)

Take this! Good lord take this! If you have an uneven ability score and are small don’t even hesitate!

10/10

Tavern Brawler

Gain a d4 unarmed strike and proficiency with improvised weapons. After striking a creature with an unarmed strike or improvised weapon on your turn you can grapple them as a bonus action.

This feat will either be the best or worst feat you take depending on your DM. If your DM lives up to the Dead Rising promise of “anything is a weapon” and lets you pick up a stick off the ground and use it as an improvised weapon: congratulations your Wizard now has an infinite supply of short swords!

The grapple after making an improvised or unarmed strike is... interesting. I’ve expressed my distaste for grappling in the past but on its own at lower levels its not the worst option. The main problem is really just that the Grappler feat is bad, but if you want to keep an enemy from running then grabbing them isn’t the worst option!

5/10

Weapon Master

Gain proficiency with 3 weapons.

Just take a single level in Fighter. Honestly upgrading your weapon’s damage die isn’t worth losing the ASI. Even in the most extreme example of upgrading a dagger (d4) to a rapier (d8) you’re only getting +4 damage potential max.

The only application I really think is worth it for this feat is Rogues, because for some stupid reason Rogues don’t get proficiency with either Scimitars or (more importantly) Whips. So if for whatever reason you want to play a Reach Weapon Whip Rogue but still get Stroke of Luck from the 20th level of Rogue then I guess Weapon Master has some use? But you could just as easily grab the Mobile feat to reap similar benefits without being forced to use a d4 weapon.

1/10

DEXTERITY

Athlete

See above.

Elven Accuracy

ELF / HALF-ELF EXCLUSIVE FEAT.

Roll 3 d20s instead of 2 when you have advantage and are attacking with DEX or a spell.

Otherwise known as “why Elf Samurai is secretly overpowered.” If you have a reliable way to get Advantage this feat is absolutely nutty. If not well... It’s still a nice way to round out an uneven Ability Score, and it works with spell attack rolls too which gives it plenty of versatility!

Basically if there’s any semi-consistent chance that you’re going to get advantage I’d take this feat. If not? There are better half feats out there. Really a shame this doesn’t work with STR attacks but I guess they didn’t want Elf Barbarians to be the most overpowered shit in the game.

8/10

Fade Away

GNOME EXCLUSIVE FEAT

Use your reaction to become invisible after taking damage. You remain invisible until the end of your next turn unless you perform an aggressive action.

Invisibility is never a bad thing. This feat gives you what is essentially a stronger version of the Shield spell once per Short Rest since (rules as written) enemies can’t target you if they can’t see you. Now of course a lot of this depends on your DM (how many enemies with Blindsense are around, and if enemies will swing where you just were because metagaming) but this feat is almost exclusively why you should play a Gnome as opposed to something else.

This feat plus Squat Nimbleness is honestly worth losing an ASI for. Fade Away, Squat Nimbleness, and Moderately Armored combined can be three very good feats for a Gnome spellcaster who already has a high casting stat.

9/10

Gunner

Crossbow Expert for guns.

Crossbow Expert for guns. The only part of this feat that affects non-firearms is the lack of disadvantage in melee range which I mean... if you’re not planning to use crossbows it might be useful? But I’d sooner take Piercer, Elven Accuracy, or another more useful feat.

GUN/10 3/10

Lightly Armored

See above.

Piercer

When you deal damage with a piercing weapon you can reroll one of the damage die on one attack per turn. When you crit you can roll an additional damage die.

The first and probably only feat where increasing one Ability Score is far more useful than the other! Let’s start with the obvious: Savage Attacker doesn’t work with ranged weapons, but since all ranged weapons (minus the Sling) do Piercing damage this feat affects them! For most ranged weapons this isn’t that big of a deal but if you’re using one of the ranged weapons with a bigger damage die (Longbow / Heavy Crossbow) it’s still nice to have, especially if you have multiple attacks and will henceforth have a higher chance of rolling low for damage.

The triple damage effect on a crit is also very nice for a ranged weapon, and lets you live out that sharpshooter fantasy. But again banking on crits is unreliable. Overall this feat is a very nice way to increase an uneven Dexterity score and get some benefits for your ranged weapons. It’s not something I’d go out of my way to get but it does feel very good to grab.

7/10 (if using DEX)

Moderately Armored

See above. Slightly better when increasing DEX because DEX is more universally useful than STR.

Resilient (DEX)

Gain proficiency with Dexterity saving throws.

Dexterity saving throws are some of the most common saving throws in 5e. Being able to halve the damage of a Fireball is always worth it.

9/10

Revenant Blade

See above.

Second Chance

HALFLING EXCLUSIVE FEAT

Force an enemy that’s attacking you to reroll their attack once per combat.

This feat interests me because (to my knowledge) it’s the only feat that replenishes when you “roll initiative at the start of combat.” But regardless: being able to force an enemy to reroll a hit on you is really nice, but mind you that there is the chance to turn a regular hit into a crit.

If your class already has reactions this really isn’t worth it. But if you’re playing something like a Fighter this can be a nice way to shrug off a hit or two over the course of the day. A good way to round out your stats and give yourself some safety, but not something I’d go out of the way to get.

7/10

Squat Nimbleness

See above.

Skill Expert

See above.

Slasher

See above.

Weapon Master

See above.

CONSTITUTION

Aberrant Dragonmark

Get one Sorcerer cantrip and one level 1 Sorcerer spell. Constitution is your spellcasting modifier for these spells. Additional effects when you cast your level 1 spell.

Veterans of this blog will know how much I love Aberrant Dragonmark. If you’re taking Magic Initiate to have a ranged attack then Aberrant Dragonmark is pretty much just universally better than Magic Initiate. The only real flaw with this feat is that you can only take from the Sorcerer list... oh and that it’s very Eberron specific. It’s unlikely that you’ll be allowed this feat, but I would recommend it for just about anyone who needs a ranged backup. Constitution becomes a lot more exciting when it’s used for more than just health.

8/10

Chef

Allies heal more during short rests. Prepare treats allies can use to gain Temporary hitpoints as a Bonus Action.

Song of Rest? Never heard of her! A fairly mediocre feat on its own, though admittedly fun for roleplay. The treats are actually not that bad to give allies a tiny bit of bulk. The definitely-not-Song of Rest feature is also good in its own right.

It’s a nice way to round out your Constitution or Wisdom if it’s uneven, and is very fun for roleplay. But it’s not the most impressive in terms of utility.

6/10

Crusher

See above.

Dragon Fear

See above.

Dragon Hide

See above.

Durable

Add double your Constitution modifier to rolled hit die while Short Resting.

I mean, it’s nice? But the only real use I see for this is for a Barbarian. It can definitely allow you save up on your hit die but unless you have a 13 in CON (14 with this feat) I wouldn’t recommend it. I’d much rather not take the damage in the first place: an ounce of prevention beats a cure!

5/10

Dwarven Fortitude

DWARF EXCLUSIVE FEAT

When you take the Dodge action you can heal with a hit die.

Otherwise known as “Dwarf Monks are super legit for no good reason.” It’s a very interesting feat that allows you to tank in interesting ways, and it’s particularly good if you know your DM doesn’t let you frequently short rest. It can be nice to heal in a pinch, but much like with Durable I’d rather negate the damage than heal with hit die.

And if your DM allows frequent short rests? This feat is objectively worse than Durable, since it doesn’t really matter when you heal with hit die.

5/10

Infernal Constitution

TIEFLING EXCLUSIVE FEAT

Resist Cold and Poison damage, and gain Advantage on saving throws against Poisons.

You already resist Fire damage, which is extremely common. This feat adds two more common damage types to that list, and also helps you against a common debuff. This is just a very good way to give your character more bulk! Of course if you aren’t fighting a lot of poisonous or cold enemies this feat won’t be too practical, but in a standard campaign with varied foes this will quickly carry its weight!

7/10

Orcish Fury

See above.

Resilient (CON)

Gain proficiency with Constitution saving throws.

Constitution saves are extremely common, most notably for Concentration checks. Other people have done the math that Resilient scales better than War Caster to help with Concentration checks. This feat is a must-have for spellcasters, and very good all-around.

10/10

Second Chance

See above.

Skill Expert

See above.

Tavern Brawler

See above.

INTELLIGENCE

Elven Accuracy

See above.

Fade Away

See above.

Fey Teleportation

HIGH ELF EXCLUSIVE FEAT

Learn Sylvan. Cast Misty Step once per Short Rest.

Otherwise known as LITERALLY THE ONLY REASON TO PLAY A HIGH ELF. Holy shit if you’re playing a High Elf take this feat! A free language is nice and all but Misty Step is one of the most useful utility spells in the game, and you have near-constant access to it!

10/10

Fey Touched

Learn Misty Step and one additional first level spell from the Enchantment or Divination schools. You can cast both of these spells once without using a spell slot.

Misty Step is one of the strongest spells in the game: if your class doesn’t normally get it I’d definitely recommend Fey Touched just to get Misty Step. Being able to grab strong first level Enchantment and Divination spells like Hex, Hunter’s Mark, Bless, Heroism, and Detect Magic are also very useful.

9/10

Flames of Phlegethos

Reroll 1s when dealing Fire damage. Surround yourself in Fire when casting a Fire damage spell.

Otherwise known as “Elemental Adept lite.” Only really useful if you’re planning to consistently be in close range, but very fun and flavorful if you are casting fire up close.

I honestly wish this feat wasn’t Tiefling exclusive because it’s cool as shit but so situational: I’d love to see a version of this feat that’s damage type exclusive and race exclusive. Hm maybe that’ll be a Homebrew project of mine.

7/10

Keen Mind

Know some information you should probably already know.

Otherwise known as “hey mister DM I forgot to buy a compass or a watch in town, and I’m too stupid to take notes.” This is the feat for bad players, and most DMs will ignore it even if you do take it.

1/10

Linguist

Learn 3 languages. Write cyphers.

The languages are honestly useless: Comprehend Languages is a first level spell, and Tongues is a third level spell. The cyphers are a lot more interesting, but they’re admittedly extremely situational outside of specific campaigns. It also really sucks that your feat can be undone with the Comprehend Languages spell, which can be cast as a ritual.

4/10

Observant

+5 to Passive Perception / Investigation. You can read creatures’ lips if you understand the language they’re speaking.

The ability to read creatures’ lips is honestly really interesting for espionage, but let’s be real: you picked up this feat for the increase to Passive Perception. Honestly if you don’t want to be ambushed just take the Alert feat.

7/10

Resilient (INT)

Gain proficiency with Intelligence saving throws.

Intelligence saves are rare. Devastating when they occur, yes. But I’d sooner take Observant, Linguist, or one of the Tasha’s feats over Resilient.

5/10

Shadow Touched

Learn the Invisibility spell and one additional first level spell from the Necromancy or Illusion schools. You can cast both of these spells once without using a spell slot.

Invisibility is less universally useful than Misty Step, and Necromancy / Illusion spells are weaker than Divination / Enchantment spells. (At least if we’re talking first level.) There are some nice ones like Disguise Self and Inflict Wounds but generally speaking mobility is more useful in my humble opinion.

7/10

Skill Expert

See above.

Telekinetic

Learn the Mage Hand cantrip. If you know it already, increase its range by 30 feet. You can make the Mage Hand invisible. Additionally, you may shove a creature 5 feet towards or away from you as a Bonus Action on your turn.

Mage Hand is one of the best cantrips in the game and being able to make it invisible was a subclass feature restricted to just Arcane Trickster Rogues previously. Having an invisible grabbing arm is insanely useful, and extending it to 60 feet is even better.

And that isn’t even the best part! Being able to shove people around isn’t necessarily the most overpowered thing but it still gives you a way to use your Bonus Action every turn! If you play on a tabletop you can use this feat to push enemies back into AoE damage abilities or pull allies away from danger! In Theater of the Mind however this feat isn’t as strong and I wouldn’t recommend using the shove too much as its liable to annoy your DM.

8/10

Telepathic

You can speak telepathically to a creature within 60 feet of you. They have to understand the language, and don’t gain the ability to respond telepathically. Additionally, you learn the Detect Thoughts spell, and can cast it once per Long Rest without using a spell slot.

Detect Thoughts isn’t that great of a spell, though granted this is just my personal experience. That being said having telepathy is extremely useful, and this is speaking from experience!

I will say right now: take this feat if you are a Druid. Unless your DM is a real stickler for the rules this will let you speak to people while Wildshaped! This opens up a whole world of possibilities for your Druid! I unironically consider this feat mandatory for a Druid, and fairly useful for any other character who wants to speak quietly and stealthily. And you know: doesn’t have access to Message.

8/10 - Mandatory for a Druid

WISDOM

Chef

See above.

Elven Accuracy

See above.

Fey Touched

See above.

Observant

See above.

Resilient (WIS)

Gain proficiency with Wisdom saving throws.

Wisdom saves are very common, but most Wisdom classes already get Wisdom saving throw proficiency. If you have an uneven Wisdom score it can be worth it to get the proficiency, but Wisdom saving throws are arguably the most common saving throw to be proficient with.

7/10

Shadow Touched

See above.

Skill Expert

See above.

Telekinetic

See above.

Telepathic

See above.

CHARISMA

Actor

Gain advantage when pretending to be someone else, and become capable of mimicking someone’s voice after listening to them.

A very good feat if you plan to do any infiltration or other political intrigue stuff. With the Disguise Self spell this feat can be used by just about anyone, but the real value comes for Changelings. Having Disguise Self as a racial trait means the “be better at fooling people” feat is insanely useful. Inversely this feat isn’t as useful for Kenku since you can already mimic voices more-or-less perfectly.

This feat is inherently situational but it’s beyond useful for the campaigns where it can be used. And again: it’s near-mandatory for a Changeling or a Warlock with the Mask of Many Faces invocation (or anyone who takes Eldritch Adept for Mask of Many Faces.)

7/10 - Mandatory for Changelings

Dragon Fear

See above.

Dragon Hide

See above. (How the hell this feat increases Charisma I have no idea.)

Elven Accuracy

See above.

Fey Teleportation

See above.

Fey Touched

See above.

Flames of Phlegethos

See above.

Resilient (CHA)

Gain proficiency in Charisma saving throws.

Charisma saving throws are extremely rare, and more often than not they’re more of the “don’t get to play the game” variety and less “die super bad and become a living vegetable” like Intelligence saving throws. Even if looking to round out uneven ability scores feats like Skill Expert and Telepathic are better.

3/10

Second Chance

See above.

Shadow Touched

See above.

Skill Expert

See above.

Telekinetic

See above.

Telepathic

See above.

HELPFUL CHART OR SOMETHING

[greenninjagal-blog]

Have you considers a sanders sides and leverage crossover with: Virgil as Hitter (fight or flight, am I right?), Remus as Hacker (Cha0s style hacking), Logan as Thief (thievery takes knowledge of layouts & memorization), Roman and Grifter (he’s an actor, duh), and Janus as Mastermind (super dramatic, will plot)? I’m thinking Patton as Sterling, trying to do the right thing & ready to get into moral debates with ex-insurance agent partner Janus.

Oh my god i fucking love you anon!! Leverage is actually one of the first aus i have drafts of in my notes!! Modified of course now that youve reminded me!!

In my notes i have Remus as the Mastermind, coming up with creative answers and knowing every scam that could ever be pulled, ex insurance agent who left the straight and narrow when his nephew's, Thomas's, experimental surgery wouldnt be paid for by the company he worked for. Hes brash, hes rude, hes drunk because thats easier than dealing with hurt. If he drove everyone away while he was grieving?? Fine! He didnt want them there anyway! He doesnt need anyone, not even Roman.

Then Virgil as the hacker, who does not do other people like at all, no thanks. Hell steal everything youve ever owned and you'll never see his face. Atrocious sleeping patterns means that he has a lot of free time and he likes to keep busy in that free time so tons of hobbies and skills in the arts, a billiom deep cover alias for the others on the team, and trivia knowledge on just about everything wikipedia has ever had an article about.

Logan as the hitter, who hits things. very straightforward. Why talk when you can just punch stupid people? Logans the best at what he does, and what he does is protect and defend by any means. Yes he can sing country. No he does not do it by choice. His glasses were a prop from one of his alias, Dr. Crofters, the accountant, but Logan found he liked them and well...the others said sometimes he needed to do things for himself instead of just following orders. (Not that following orders keeps him from putting Remus in his place.)

Patton is a thief. But hes a good thief okay? He steals from the rich people and gives to the kids that were like him: the orphans, the forgotten, the ignored and neglected, the not good enoughs. Hes been told all his life by all his foster families that nothing around his is his own: not the toys, not the clothes, the beds or the food. If he wanted to keep something he had to steal it, but that cant make him a bad person right?? He needed those things to survive!! And if hes not even stealing for himself than hes doubly not a bad person!! See, everythings okay!! He likes the feeling of a freefall, because in the air, up high, hes untouchable by anything. No thoughts, no wondering if hes a good person, nothing. Its just instinct and adrenaline. Oh, also he smiles all the time, because you know....the families never wanted the sad kid! They wanted the one that smiled and laughed and knew when to be quiet!! So no being sad! Or angry!! Or hurt!! Hes just happy and never anything else!!

Janus is made of lies. So many lies. At some point he thinks he forgot how many he was telling. Janus is an old name though. A favorite of his, so he keeps it. Hes been grifting since he was able to talk, pushed by a high political family to be perfect and wonderful. Hes the best actor he knows, and he knows many because he also happens to love theater a lot. (He himself is terrible on stage, but directing??? Give him a medal please and thanks) He loves fine dining and jewelry and art and wine, and he loves stealing them all more. He has run into all of the others at least once before, messing up their individual cons, but only Remus and Virgil happen to know him by face (Janus happen to have gotten Virgil caught back when they were seventeen and because of it Virgil no longer does cons in person, thanks). At some point Janus is sure his web of lies is gonna come crashing down, but until then, he's content to rob the rich and buy himself another suit.

Now i bet you're wondering where the fuck Roman is in all of this. Guess whos son died and he then threw himself into work! Roman is an insurance agent, who when teamed up with Remus, used to kill it on the catching-theives floor. Theyd been together for years and had each others backs through everything. When Roman came out as Bi?? Remus was ready to fight anyone who dared look at his brother wrong. Roman was so excited to be a dad, he loved Thomas so fucking much. When Thomas's mom dipped out Remus was the first he turned too for help, and boy did Remus deliever (best uncle ever(tm)). Everything was great, until Thomas got sick. And he didnt...he didnt... get better. Roman threw himself into work, Remus threw himself into the bottle.

And the next thing Roman knows Remus is the one robbing a client of their company???? And hes doing it Drunk!! And still somehow outsmarting Roman!! Roman cant figure out why Remus suddenly decided to become a criminal, but his choice in victims, which are all clients from their company, feels like a direct jab at Roman himself-- a personal challenge! Roman will catch him even if its the last thing he does, because he needs to know why Remus-- the man Thomas looked up to so much--would do suddenly lose his mind like this....

[So yes anon i have thought about it, deeply, intricately, embarrassingly. If i didnt have so many aus, and if more people seemed interested, i would probably make more for it....]

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