#and be okay with myself

[flame-shadow]

hey did you know??? that if you stop stretching and maintaining mobility in your body then it goes away?? things get tight and you can't move the way that you used to??? and when you decide to try getting a stretch routine going that the first week fucking sucks because you keep going 'damn i used to be able to do this no problem' and then you have to switch gears and be kind to yourself and just focus on getting better from here instead of berating yourself for dropping the good habits in the first place??? and your body never stops aging so you gotta keep taking care of it and sometimes you gotta take care of it extra in certain areas because of things that happened when you were younger and it's boring and sometimes hurts but it's so necessary???

i am yelling this at myself right now i am going through An Experience (trying to get into a routine of body maintenance again for my physical and mental health)

[whatkindofnameisella]

can you believe that we have fanfiction. that we have websites dedicated to fanfiction. that there is a place that you can go and read tens, hundreds, thousands and thousands of pieces of writing that strangers have made. people who are not "writers". people who come home at the end of the day and have feelings and say, i am going to put that into words. i am going to share those words. short, long, sweet, sad, horny, funny, wonderful words. we are all just human and we all love to make and remake and share that with others. can you believe that.

[mroddmod]

rough seas

[trekkiesagainstchastity]

It doesn't matter if that fic has been in your drafts for years and is now self-indulgent to the point of parody. If Steven Moffatt is allowed to do it professionally, you are allowed to do it for fun.

[artkaninchenbau]

A h-heartfelt reunion..?

Bonus

[sunlitsoil]

there is always tomorrow

[bioethicists]

it's very important to understand how a personality disorder diagnosis functions in the psychiatric system, even if you identify with the diagnosis or find it useful.

personality disorders on your medical record will be used to discredit anything you say or do. they indicate "don't bother listening to this person; apply treatment regardless of their wishes but also they're probably manipulating/attention-seeking so maybe don't bother treating them". needing support becomes attention-seeking. behaviors that would be treated + supported in someone without this diagnosis are ignored or treated as manipulative. providers are instructed to "withdraw warmth" (a real thing in the DBT provider's manual, btw) in response to self-injury or suicidal ideation.

if you have been dx'd with a personality disorder professionally, you likely understand this.

now, here's the important part: this is not an issue of 'stigma' against a politically neutral, pre-discursive True Disease which is being Unfairly Maligned. these diagnoses were formulated based on the idea that some patients cannot be trusted, that some patients seek care too much. they are applied to patient charts as a justification for withdrawing care or as a dismissal of someone "not getting better" fast enough. in the uk, they are often employed by the nhs to shame or problematize people who use large amounts of nhs resources, arguing that receiving a lot of care through the nhs is a negative behavior stemming from a disordered personality.

there are elements of personality disorders which resonate strongly with many people, including myself, but you need to be clear-eyed about the origins + functions of this diagnosis. as a whole, they were created + function as ways to discredit + mistreat noncompliant or "difficult" patients. 'reclaiming' them is not going to change how they function systematically- it is going to make it easier to engage in this systematic neglect by evoking 'ableism' or 'stigma!' when people question the utility or application of the diagnosis.

[cerealxperimentslain]

Hey! Hey you! Look at the original post!

Please Help Hala Daoud get to Egypt for treatment of her debilitating illness (MS)

If you laughed at the haha funny gollum clip, please give me another moment of your time.

Hala (@/halakamak) was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 2021. Multiple sclerosis is an autoimmune disease that targets the central nervous system, and if left to progress can be permanently disabling. There is no cure, but there is treatment that can mitigate the damage it does to the central nervous system. Hala needs this treatment, so she can avoid becoming permanently disabled by the disease, but after the collapse of their healthcare system it is not available in Gaza anymore. The medication is also extremely expensive, $12,000 for just one dose that lasts only 6 months, and she must now pay this all on her own. Please help her get to Egypt to purchase this medication!

in four months she has only raised €1,566 of the target €17,000

VETTED row 954 on The ButterflyEffect Project

VETTED number 307 on @/el-shab-hussein & @/nabulsi's Vetted Gaza Fundraiser List

[thatbarricade]

noo don’t cry about july ending and the time passing, just remember the july poem :)

[egophiliac]

half a warm-up doodle, half consoling myself because I have thrown so many keys at him and yet he refuses to come home. >:( please sir...your stats are so good and your elements are ones I need...please...

[lovebunnie]

“i love being aromantic” i say as i feel my chest cavity rotting from the inside at the unquenchable desire for love in a way that is truly a secret third thing but its not a secret i want to keep it is a secret nobody is willing to listen to and im trapped in a state of isolation of my own making because no matter how much love i have to give it will never be enough. it will never be enough. it will never be enough.

[tayliii]

i am actually healing, i still sometimes cry at how i have been treated in the past but i am genuienly content with myself. the thing is i am not used to that, when you have been depressed for whole 3 years and with no social life and only one friend that you base your entire worth of them liking you, you aren't used to having more friends who actually care about you and talk to you daily and also some other friends who you arent that close with but are glad to have them in your life because they make it more positive and lively. and oh god it feels so weird and uncomfortable when some days at like 3 am when you feel down and just wish that you could sink into your own sadness and drown in it but you can't because you are not the you from one or teo years ago, the you who felt sad and numb daily, and yes you do feel numb at some days but it's a content numbness it doesnt feel isolating and lonely and it feels more like peace. it feels really uncomfortable because i was comfortable with my sadness it wrapped me up like a soft blanket and protected me from being hurt. because when you have hope and something dissapoints you, you become extremely sad but when you are constatly sad it doesnt hit you as hard as it would if you had hope so it did protect me in some form of way but it also took many many good things away from me. and now i dont have that blanket on me anymore that would protect me from the monsters named dissapointment, sadness, loneliness so i don't know how i am meant to protect myself know i know the best i could do is just pick up the pieces of me after being broken, i have no clue if one of my friendships from now broke apart i dont know how i can go about my days without sending them tiktoks,reels texting them and videocalling them because i am used to that right and i fear change so much i fear that we will grow up, they will find husbands, and have kids, and then have no time for me and our friendships are gonna go weird there will be space between us, the people that know everything about me is gonna forget all of these and i am so scared of being forgotten and forgetting things please give me the blessing that is to remember. and i don't know where to put this sadness if our friendships falls apart, before i had this hollow space in me and i put this sadness inside me over and over again until it was too much for my inside that it started to show on my body too, on my arms, on my thights, on my belly. but my inside is full right now with happiness and i dont want it to be hollow again to store my sadness inside it. i dont know what to do with this feelings i don't know where to put it, i don't know where to put the love i have for them when they are not a part of my life anymore. and i can't give it to someone else because every friend is another love because they are different and uniqe from each other i have different types of love that i have for them and since there will be no one like that again that love i have for them is gonna have to exist somewhere but i will always be either inside me or linked to me someway. but it going to be okay because i am actually healing

[scattered-under-moonlight]

[frillsand]

[hemi-demi]

I've seen it said in places that Jon and Martin's relationship (specifically Jon realizing he has feelings for Martin) feels rushed and out of nowhere, and there's a perspective here that I want to share.

I think some people see them as explicitly a gay couple and expect them both to react a certain way to each other, but I have some thoughts as to why Jon is different and their relationship might not look like a traditional MLM story.

I feel that Jon's affections for Martin are absolutely there and growing over time, but with him being acespec, possibly autistic (the "I feel...sad" moment screams alexithymia to me. He doesn't fully understand his internal feelings until they're too big to ignore), and trying very hard to not get murdered for several seasons, I think it's perfectly reasonable his feelings for Martin would take time to develop.

We do see him softening to Martin over time. We see him thinking about Martin unprompted when he's alone. We see him going from "this man is going to ruin this delicate facade I've put up to seem professional, and I want him gone immediately." to "Oh, you're actually capable. So capable you might be trying to kill me." To "I don't want him to get involved or he might get hurt. I need to keep my distance so he's safe." To "I'm going to make myself tea out of nowhere because the guy who usually made it for me all the time isn't here and now it's part of my routine and I want to keep that part of him around while I'm hiding out for murder."

But once he identifies his own feelings, he overcorrects right into hopeless romantic. He's pining hard all S4, because he finally realized himself that he's in love and it's at the worst possible time. It is abrupt. Dude only just figured it out and he's throwing his whole ass into this.

I think even without the autistic headcanon, the acespec nature of how he views relationships and his whole "I feel...sad" moment indicates clearly that he was just oblivious to his own feelings for a very long time.

I know it feels sudden, but some of us are oblivious, okay? I was friends with a girl for 2 years before my brain flipped the switch and Jon's reaction felt so familiar, and I love it. I just hardly ever get to see "me" in media, and it's a bummer when people say it feels unrealistic. It's not, it's just not the norm.

[nothorses]

after having an entire hour long conversation with my coworkers about what "degendering" is, and the importance of using trans people's pronouns when you know them- rather than always defaulting to "they/them" no matter what- and still getting "they/them"ed by people I trusted not to fucking do that to me, I have decided that the name and pronouns circle of introductions for new additions to the group will now include the very clearly stated boundary that they do not use "they/them" pronouns for me.

your move, cowards!