#and also you can’t have an important plot point happen in another show

[bootswithdafur]

my biggest fear for Gen V is that it’s going to suffer from extended universe syndrome in that nothing actually important can happen because it would effect the story of the boys

[fake-bleach]

HOTEL ROOM | SOLDIER BOY x READER

"babysitting" a nearing hundred year old supe wasn't your ideal day, nor was it ever on your bucket list. but, maybe it'll be worthwhile.

word count: 7k

WARNINGS/DISCLAIMERS: (18+ only!) fem!reader, slight slow burn but very much worth it, porn w/ somewhat much plot & angst/fluff, praise/degrading, use of pet names (honey, baby, sweetheart, etc), drugs i.e. snorting shit (oops, but what else did u expect w/ him..), handjob, piv, unprotected gradual rough sex, tiny bit of hair pulling, coming inside, i thinkk that might be it? happy ending :p another disclaimer: soldier boy's def much softer/vulnerable here cus i feel like reader can change him :) (i'm delusional) :) hope u enjoy! <33

ao3 link! | my masterlist

it’s not like you wanted to babysit. 

and by babysit, i mean watching a 100 year old supe that was still very much alive and well. did i also mention that he was an asshole?

probably not, but you should know that too.

“butcher! no fucking way, there's no fucking way i’m doing this shit!”

you whispered loudly in the british man’s face, trying to make sure that supe couldn’t hear you. but, god, what could that man not do?

butcher rolled his eyes at you, that constant, smug smirk plastered on his face as he shook his head. “oh, c’mon love. you’ll be fine. all he’ll do is watch the telly, snort some shit, and talk ya’ ear off,” he laughed as he stared at your annoyed expression, “i need you here, anyway. can’t have anything happen to you, you got that?”

you turned away from him for a moment, crossing your arms and glancing at the infamous man sat on the hotel bed. you bit the inside of your cheek, sighing out as your head hung low, staring at the floor. for once, you just wanted butcher to take you seriously. to bring you along for the important shit, not this.

but, what else could you do?

you moved to face him again, letting out a noise of disapproval, but your words showing otherwise. “fine, fine, okay. just this one fucking time, okay? you owe me.” you spoke loudly now, your irritation extremely evident.

“oh, come on, doll. am i really that bad?”

soldier boy’s ben’s voice made you flinch; his booming voice sending a rush throughout your body. one part of you was afraid, and the other annoyed. you whipped your head to look at him, his large frame stood in front of you now. he was more than just large; he was powerful.. intimidating. and you’d be lying to yourself if he wasn’t at least a.. little attractive to you. but, you couldn’t let that affect you.

he also had an unbearable ego that practically everyone around him could sense, his arrogant smile directed towards you nearly making your blood boil. 

“considering how much of a conceited asshole you are, i’d say yes,” you bit back at him, returning a condescending grin in response.

ben whistled then, his smile never faltering as he took in your powerful presence and words. “phew! she’s a feisty one, yeah? she yours or is she for the taking?” he teased butcher as a low laugh erupted from him, making you groan. to your surprise, though, his question sounded genuine.

“oh, fuck you! i’m not anyone’s!” you let out, tightening your crossed arms as your eyes moved to butcher. he all but laughed, pursing his lips as he shook his head at ben, pausing for a moment. “oi, play nice you two. can’t be coming back to this room in shambles..” his eyes flickered between you and ben, licking his lips, “but, to answer your question; no, she ain’t, but good luck tryin’, mate. i tried it myself.”

you punched butcher’s shoulder at that, scoffing. “don’t encourage him, you asshole.”

butcher laughed, raising his hands in surrender and giving you an almost apologetic look as he backed up, starting to walk towards the hotel room door. “alright, bye now, love. and you–” he pointed towards ben, his face hardening for a second, “behave, will ya?”

you watched him open the door, shutting it behind him as dread filled your every being. you turned to ben again, his eyes already fixed on you with that same smirk.

“oh yeah, i’ll definitely behave.”

only a few hours in, and you already feel like you’re going insane.

a ton of snarky remarks and about a million snorts of cocaine later, you’re just fighting the throbbing headache that’s building up. hell, anyone would feel the same in your position.

ben was sitting at the small table, you at the end of the bed right next to it, surrounded by fast food and pills. using the end of his knife, he was crushing the small tablets on the table, turning them into fine, white powder. it made you cringe, to say the least.

you watched him as he lined it up, sliding his nose through it eagerly as he sniffed, snorting the line completely. he let out a groan of satisfaction, the white powder stuck on his skin as the high he so desperately craved filled his body.

you let out a quiet chuckle to yourself, shaking your head. for one of the greatest supes in the history of mankind, he was certainly a treasure.

not.

“what are you laughin’ at, huh?” ben looks at you, his face firm as he poses the question. your lips flip, pursing, then frowning slightly as you shake your head. “oh, nothing, nothing. you just.. love that shit, don’t you?” you accuse, a small chuckle escaping your lips again.

his face shifts, a faint smile presented. “what? you want some, is that it?”

“oh no, god no. don’t want any coke of yours, no thank you.” you turn him down instantly, almost as if you couldn’t dream of it.

he laughs now, the deep gravel in it making you shudder slightly. “s’not cocaine, sweetheart. something like it, yeah, but not coke,” he informs you, watching intently as you return your attention to him, interest piquing. you didn’t know much about these kinds of drugs, surprisingly enough considering the people you surrounded yourself with, but you weren’t completely innocent.

he takes notice of your sudden curiosity; your eyes widening just a tad bit more than usual. the way your body language shifts. he notices it all.

cocking his head slightly, he lets out a small chuckle again. “you ever done drugs before, sweetheart?” he asks sincerely, wanting to know. you deny, shaking your head, “no, i mean– i’ve smoked weed maybe once, but i don’t know– never had a reason to do it again, i guess.”

he raises an eyebrow at that, leaning back against the chair he was sat in and crosses his arms. “that so? i’m shocked,” he hums, biting the inside of his cheek at he stares at you, “powerhouse like you, i woulda’ expected you to do allll that crazy shit.”

you snort, looking at him in disbelief. “you got the wrong idea of me then, soldier boy.” you tell him, emphasizing his name. boost his ego a bit more for the fun of it, y’know?

he snickers, staring at you as if you were some puzzle he needed to solve. “do i?” he pushes, leaning a bit forward, “i don’t think i do.”

you roll your eyes at him. “and why’s that?” 

he breathes out, grinning even wider. “sweetheart, you’ve got it written all over you.”

your eyebrows furrow at him, confused. the fuck did he mean by that?

before you could question him, he beats you to it, laying it on you.

“i mean, your attitude with butcher earlier? i don’t know about you, but that don’t sound like someone who takes shit.” he scoffs, his eyes locked on you as he pauses.

“...and you’re not taking any of mine, are you?”

you breathe out through your nose, licking your drying lips and taking in his words. “no, no i guess i’m not,” you admit, appreciating the slight bit of generosity from him, “but, what’s that gotta do with me and your drugs?” you laugh, unable to connect the two.

ben shakes his head, uncrossing his arms and moving his forearm on top of the table, leaning on it. “you’re a curious one, aren’t you? that’s why you didn’t wanna stay with me, right? y’wanted to go out there, save the fuckin’ world, huh?” he inquires, giving you the perfect opportunity to tease him instead of taking him seriously.

“well, no. i actually didn’t wanna stay with you because you’re an–”

“stop being a fuckin’ nag and answer the question.”

his voice booms in your ears, the direct intimidation from him working on you like a charm. you swallow, eyes shifting to look at the table for a moment before returning to him. 

“fine, whatever, i guess you’re right, yeah, i’m.. curious. but, fuck..” you lick your bottom lip, shaking your head as you stare out in front of you, “you try being part of this shit for years, and not being given any opportunity to..” you trail off, huffing.

“to be a hero?” ben questions.

you turn to him now, sad eyes staring into his own. “to be a hero.”

he shakes his head, wiping his mouth and nose as he inhales sharply. “you don’t want that life, kid. trust me.”

your jaw falls open a bit at him, your voice rising, “what the hell do you know about what i want? you don’t know me.”

he huffs, his hand pressing into his knee as leverage as his body leans in towards you, scoffing.

“the fuck did i go through? huh? i was asleep for decades, sweetheart. much before that, i was tortured and experimented on and treated like a piece of fucking meat. an animal.” you stare at him sadly, your demeanor falling as he looks at you with hardened eyes.

“being a fuckin’ hero..” he shakes his head, laughing as his head lowers to look down at his lap, “look where the fuck that got me.” he mutters out, his upper lip twitching as he breathes heavily.

silence fills the room between you two as the faint background noise from the television whirs. you didn’t know what to say. you just knew that maybe.. you were wrong about soldier boy– ben.

he was avoiding your gaze, his chest rising and falling in an attempt to calm himself down. you swallow, pursing your lips. “ben.. i’m sorry you went through that, i really am,” you began, causing him to lift his head at you, “but.. that doesn’t change the fact that you’ve helped people. you’ve saved people. and, yeah, maybe sometimes you weren’t the good guy, but.. you’ve done more than what a lot of people would.”

he looks at you with doe eyes, taking in your little speech. he nods, and it’s almost as if he can’t possibly believe you, but he does. he decides to trust you as your words give him the slightest bit of hope in his heart. an emotion he hasn’t felt all these years.

he sniffs suddenly, clearing his throat and shaking his head as if he were shaking himself out of it. “yeah, well, maybe you’re right. still wouldn’t want yo–” he pauses, cutting himself off, “uh, y’know, going through that.”

you give him a small smile, understanding him completely. it was hard for him to be vulnerable; you knew that now. but, you appreciated his efforts nonetheless. it made you see him.. differently. the way he spoke to you about his experiences.. you wondered if there truly was a good man underneath that harsh persona.

“well, thank you.. soldier boy.”

“oh, stop with that shit. ben.”

you smile. “ben.”

“alright, love. m’ sorry, i promise i’ll make it up to you, yeah?”

you groan into the phone held against your ear, picking up the words of the same british man on the other end of the line. god, i’m never letting him off the hook, you thought to yourself. 

“okay, yeah, whatever.”

“don’t stay mad at me–”

you cut him off, “bye, butcher.”

“bye, love.”

you hear him end the phone call, the sound making you throw your phone down on the bed irritatedly. “the fuck happened?” ben asks you as he sits up on the bed, putting the remote down from surfing through channels with you for hours now. it was nighttime before you knew it, and you spent most of the day talking to ben here and there, as well as watching random shows and movies. certain topics were definitely touchy, but you were starting to get to know him more, and him with you.

you huff, walking over to the empty side of the bed to sit down next to him, crossing your arms. “we gotta stay here for the night. butcher n’ hughie are being held up with some.. shit, and don’t want us leaving without them.”

he lets out a chuckle towards your frustration. “don’t see a problem with that.”

you roll your eyes, turning to face him. “of course you don’t, you’re like– a million years old. i’m bored!” you whine, groaning. you don’t mean to act immature or fussy, but fuck, you were younger than him and needed other kinds of entertainment to survive (dramatically put). shitty television just wasn’t doing it for you.

he scoffs, “oh, fuck you. i can be plenty of fun, doll.”

“oh, yeah? prove it.” you reply, raising an eyebrow.

he smirks at you then, leaning in a bit closer as his face grows snarky. “you want me to show you fun?” he teases.

you groan, grimacing, “ugh, grossss..” you draw out, swallowing sharply as you turn away.

what you didn’t want to do was recognize the butterflies you felt at the thought. or the way your heart skipped a beat at him growing closer towards you. fuck, no.

he snickers, eyes still fixed on you completely. “oh, c’mon, honey. y’know i’m a great fuck. n’ besides.. it’s been awhile..” he teases you further, and he makes it sound so sleazy that it feels like a joke; fuck, maybe he really was just trying to rile you up.

you shake your head though, playing along. “nice try, ben. gonna have to try harder than that, though.” you stand your ground, giving him a faux smile.

he raises his hands in surrender, shrugging his shoulders. “hey, i’ll fuckin’ work for it, baby, i’ll tell you that much.” he admits, grinning at you.

you try your hardest to keep your composure, fighting the heat growing in your face, especially with that new nickname he gives you. a weak spot.

fuck. this was gonna be much harder than you thought.

you’re finishing the leftover fries that ben requested earlier, snagging them from his side as you laid next to him on the bed; cold and soggy, and definitely not appetizing, but you’re working with what you’ve got. you feel the bed shift before looking up at ben, his eyes on you as he moves.

“so, other ideas of fun..” ben trails, standing up from the bed and walking towards the table.

“i’m listening..” you curiously give in.

he grabs his knife, pouring out the remainder of his pills, and starts to crush them, noticing the way his eyes look up at you, eyebrows raised.

“you do a line with me. just one–” he suggests, his attention focused to see how you’ll react. “and you can loosen up for fuckin’ once.”

you grimace at his suggestion, denying him immediately. “no, ben, i don’t.. i don’t know. this isn’t my kind of thing, you know that..” you speak, evidently unsure of the act. come on, snorting some random, crushed up pills? didn’t sound like much fun to you.

he puts the knife down, turning his entire body to fully face you now. “hey, you said you were curious, didn’t you?” he raises an eyebrow, “doesn’t hurt to try it once. besides.. you can trust me, can’t you?” he teases, a sly smile on his face.

you huff, “yeah, sure. sure i can.” you joke at him, sarcasm filling your voice entirely. your face drops though, seriously contemplating his inquiry. “okay, seriously, though. it won’t fuck me up.. completely, right?”

he laughs at your question, his low voice rumbling. “not unless you take more than you can handle, baby.” he tells you, starting to crush the pills again. “i’m right here, though. i’ll getcha’ through it. promise.”

you were shocked at how.. kind he was being with you. how utterly careful he was with you now. it was odd, to say the least. but, you liked this side of him. maybe that’s why you were starting to feel so comfortable with him now.

you think about it for a few seconds longer before ultimately coming to a decision. “i.. okay, okay. just once.” you agree, nervously standing up from the bed and approaching the table, pulling up another chair to sit next to him.

fuck it. what else did you have to lose?

sitting down, you watch carefully as he proceeds to crush up the pills, examining how fine the powder turned. ben uses the knife to separate it, forming some of it into a line that was a bit shorter than what you saw him repeatedly snort earlier. 

was he making sure he wasn’t giving you too much? maybe. you didn’t want to think of it too much.. his intentions. you couldn’t. 

you swallow tensely, eyes flickering from the table to his face as he finishes, his own setting themselves on you. he gives you a small smile; an almost encouraging kind, providing you with a bit of comfort.

he raises an eyebrow at you. “you ready?”

“uh,” you stammer out, biting your bottom lip, “what exactly.. is it, though? i mean, what’s it gonna do to me?” you ask warily, second thoughts arising in your head.

he sighs out as he attempts to think of what to say. “these here are bennies, as we call em’. or, well– what i call em’,” he lets out a small laugh, cocking his head, “they’re amphetamines. they’ll just.. give ya’ a bit more energy.. that euphoria people talk about,” he explains to you as thoroughly as he can, “shouldn’t last too long, n’ if anything, you can try to sleep it off, sweetheart. no harm, no foul.”

he watches your face as you absorb his answer, noticing your features relax with each second that passes. he grins even more, listening to you.

“okay.. okay, doesn’t sound.. too bad. let’s do it,” you quickly spur out, shaking yourself out of it. “fuck it.”

“atta girl.” he gleames, his hand lifting to rub your upper back gently for just a moment; a moment long enough to send chills down your spine. the first time he’s really made any physical contact with you, and you’re already a mess. 

fuck, why did that feel good? why did that sound good? it was a harmless gesture.

you need that high, and you need it now. maybe that was the only way you could get through this long ass night with him.

“okay. do i just.. sniff it, uh?” you ask him, letting out an embarrassed laugh as your lips turn upwards. he nods, his own lips curling. “don’t overthink it. you’ve seen me do it a hundred times now,” he tells you confidently, muttering out the last words, “y’know what to do, honey.”

you just nod, leaning your head forward and slowly putting your nose against the right side of the line. before you can allow yourself to back out, you slide your nose towards the left, snorting it completely. you lift your head up, an abrupt cough escaping your throat as your nose burns, your eyes rolling back before shutting tightly.

“oh, there you fucking go. there you go, baby, there you go..” ben softly praises you, his words almost echoing in your ears as your head thumps. his hand returns back to your skin as he rubs your back in circular motions, your breathing growing heavy as you feel the drug enter your system.

“oh, fuck, ben, what the fuck!” you let out, a laugh escaping your throat as your head grows hazy. you turn to him, his hand still rubbing your back, which was definitely helping, and you grin widely. “that was fucking crazy!” you all but yell, excitement getting the best of you. what a way to show your experience, huh?

he chuckles, shaking his head as he stares at you. “alright, don’t get ahead of yourself, peaches. barely gave you half of what i’d normally do,” ben tells you, teeth bare as his smile widens, “that’s enough shit for you, little lady. can’t be too much of a bad influence on ya’, can i? butcher would rip me a new one.. or he’d try, at least.”

you giggle at that, your composure slowly, but surely, fading. “oh ben, aren’t you supposed to be a big n’ bad supe?” you breathe out, “he’s just a man.. and you’re a.. superhero.. y’wouldn’t let him..” you murmur out, eyes dazed out as you look at the man in front of you. his scruffy beard.. his messy hair.. the details in his skin.. fuck.

was he always this pretty?

you giggle again, his hand slowly lowering to the midst of your back to rest there. he chuckles lowly; an action that makes your breath hitch. “oh, sweetheart.. you’re feeling it already, aren’t you? quicker than i thought..” he trails off, cocking his head, “you think i’m some big, bad supe? s’that it?” he teases, lips curling up as he breathes you in, inching just a tad bit closer. “think i wouldn’t let him get one in?” he whispers.

you shake your head, smile dropping as your face hardens. “no, no, i wouldn’t, nuh uh,” you deny, biting your lip as energy suddenly surges through you, your filter entirely out the window. “i’ve seen you, you know? i mean, who hasn’t? videos of.. the way you fight.. you’re strong..” you mutter, swallowing as you giggle again, “so strong.”

he laughs, his index and middle finger connecting to rub subtle circles on your skin, “have you now?” he asks almost matter-of-factly, “you did research on me, baby?”

your stomach drops a bit, butterflies storming your stomach at the nickname again. you stammer out, “no, no, not research– i mean– yeah, i.. searched you up, but i jus’ wanted to see who you were before i.. came here, but.. s’not like i.. put that much thought into it, i–” you spit out, an involuntary laugh erupting from you as your cheeks heat up from your confession. a lie that escapes straight through your teeth.

oh god. why the fuck were you saying all of this shit outloud? stop!

he shrugs, a sly frown swift on his lips. “don’t gotta make a fuss about it, honey. s’cute. real sweet of you..” he grins, the hand so glued onto your back sliding down sleekly, fingers gripping onto your hip now. you gasp softly at the sudden touch, his grasp on you pulling you just a bit closer to him. your chairs are right next to each other, hips nearly joined together now. he whispers out, his mouth close enough to catch your ear, “sweet girl like you.. i’m honored you think of me that way. wouldn’t have suspected it from how feisty you were earlier.”

you roll your eyes at him, avoiding the flutter in your core as the drug builds up inside of you, fighting it. “oh, come on. you probably used to get this shit all of the time.”

he breathes out, shaking his head. “not from people i want it from..” his jaw falls open as his eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips, murmuring, “..not from you.”

your breath hitches in your throat, turning your head to look at him as your cheeks flush. you gulp, heartbeat quickening as you notice his gaze entirely locked on you. he was being serious. this wasn’t some kind of sick game of his.

you remain quiet, unsure how to respond. too nervous, too dazed to come up with some snarky remark you usually would; that you should bite back with. but, you don’t.

instead, ben’s fingers dance on your hip subtly, his other hand lifting up to caress your face; his thumb gliding against your cheek, trailing down to your bottom lip as his gaze that was once on your eyes fixes onto your mouth.. gorgeous as ever.

his thumb catches itself on your lip, pulling it down gently as he hums, satisfied. you gulp, shaking your head gently as you process what this was leading up to.

“ben.. we shouldn’t..” you whisper out, shutting your eyes for a moment as you pull away from him; just enough to have his hold off of your face. he was a fucking supe, for christ sake. you were human. and sooner or later, he’d be gone again; just like that. you couldn’t. no matter how much you so desperately craved it.

he lets out a disappointed noise, breathing out through his mouth, “why not, sweetheart?” he closes in on you again, lips near your ear as he hums, “don’t you like me, baby? don’t you want me? i like you.. n’ i sure as hell.. need you..” he sighs out, his hot breath hitting the sensitive skin on your neck, your body trembling at the feeling.

you groan softly at his words and the touch of his breath against your skin, shutting your eyes tightly. he huffs, pushing his nose softly against your neck, inhaling your scent and rapidly muttering out, “c’mon, baby, c’mon.. gonna take care of you, yeah? make you feel good, don’t y’want that?” he presses kisses on your neck, slowly trailing up to your cheek as his hands move to cup your face, quiet gasps escaping your lips. your eyes open up hazily, rolling to the back of your head as you lift your neck just enough to give him more room.

you don’t even think before you’re pressing a sloppy kiss to his lips, quietly moaning into it as your eyes flutter shut again; your disoriented mind taking over your body completely. he groans against your mouth, his soft lips becoming so harsh against yours, needy and having been deprived of this pleasure for so long.

he pulls away from the kiss for a moment, allowing the two of you to catch your breath as his large hand grips your face, the hold on it tight and rugged. he turns your head to the side, moving in to attack your neck once more with his lips, teeth grazing the skin as he grunts, his body closing in entirely.

it’s primal; instinctive and downright dirty the more he grows impatient. no longer gentle; not him, not now. he all but stands as he leans into you, his free hand moving from your back to your hips, wrapping his arm around you as he uses his super strength to lift you up effortlessly. you yelp as he picks you up, placing you directly on his lap as he settles himself back in his chair, your legs hung around his sides to the best of your ability.

“pretty fucking girl.. you stay right here..” he murmurs out, returning his kisses on you as if his seamless actions were nothing. his hands move to grip your hips tightly now, pushing you further into his lap as you involuntarily grind into him; his cock through those grey sweatpants of his beginning to harden.

“b-ben,” you stammer out, pants heavy as you let him touch you, feel you just how he wants, and you, taking him as you please. your hips and their movements quicken slowly, gradually building up and up the more your cunt throbs against his clothed skin; the way his strong hands keep you moving for him without a second to waste.

your cloudy mind from the drug intervenes with your control, unable to fully grasp your feelings or words that slip from your mind, keeping you completely vulnerable to the man below you. 

god, did that annoy you. 

but, fuck, did it feel so good.

“need you to fuck me, please, ben, please..” you whine out, grinding your core against his hardened cock faster, harder, your impatience getting the best of you. he laughs against your skin, a small moan seeping out of it as he gently bites your neck. “so needy, aren’t you, baby? gonna give you what you want, don’t you worry..”

the hands on your hips find themselves lowering, landing on your ass instantly as ben squeezes, groaning out at the feeling of your flush skin beneath his fingertips. he takes control of you easily, moving your body along his thighs and digging your cunt where he needs it the most. 

the constant friction makes you wetter with each push of his hands, his cock imprinting against his sweatpants with a perfect outline, your panties growing soaked at the sensation of it. an incoherent string of noises falls out of your lips, the gasps and moans sounding like porn to ben’s ears. a satisfied laugh from him shakes you to your core, that deep rumble multiplying your arousal.

you take matters into your own hands, fingers pushing down against his wrists to get him to loosen his grip on you, which he does. you scoot yourself back to disconnect your body from his abdomen, hips stilling on his thighs now, giving you an enticing view of the strain in his pants.

“i said..” you breathe out, mouth falling open as you look into his eyes, lust pouring out of them, “i need you to fuck me,” you emphasize, your fingers moving to palm his bulging cock through his sweats, “so, fuck me.”

you can’t be bothered anymore. you’re past waiting.

your hands slowly find a rhythm as you maintain eye contact with him, ben immediately reacting with a low moan as his hips thrust needily, “fuck, baby..” he hisses out as your fingers slip to the waistband of his sweats, your hand reaching beneath the layer. to your surprise, and delight; no underwear.

god, he was a fucking whore. you loved it. 

“jesus christ, ben,” you let out a laugh as you wrap your fingers around his cock, putting just enough pressure on it, and it makes him twitch against your touch. it elicits a throaty whine from his lips that has you clenching around nothing, squeezing him tighter, tighter. “jus’ take what you want, sweetheart, need you ‘round me, c’mon, ” ben spurs out rapidly, his words the least coherent they’ve been; his usual, old hollywood-esque diction in his voice gone. 

soldier boy, begging you with your hands on his cock and your ass in his lap? 

you couldn’t have possibly dreamt of this moment till now.

you try to hold yourself back, but the little amount of sobriety inside of you’s hardly strong enough to help you achieve that. no more waiting. not now.

“you’re lucky i’m impatient,” you breathe out, and before ben can react, you’re slipping his cock out of his sweats, the heavy weight of him on your hand sending you into a damn near spiral as he twitches against your fingers again, pre-cum practically leaking out of the tip.

you let go of him though, fingers desperately moving to the waistband of your loose sweats to slip them off. ben’s helping you immediately, lifting your hip for you with one hand, and the other hurriedly pushing them down, nearly ripping them off from the pace and force; off, off, off, he all but mutters out with eager noises.

“stupid fuckin’.. fuck, g’off–” ben grumbles until they’re successfully on the floor, and he sighs out in satisfaction, “no more fuckin’ waiting, n’more teasing.”

you nod hurriedly at him, bare legs exposed for him now as his fingers dig into your thighs, taking no second to waste to slide to the hem of your panties, fingers hooking onto them. “useless fuckin’ things,” ben murmurs, and before you can protest, he rips them off seamlessly, throwing them to the floor.

your jaw falls open, gasping out at him, “ben! fuck, i needed those! i didn’t pack any–” 

he shuts you up instantly, his thick index and middle fingers finding your slit, swiping through your soaked folds, and you whine loudly, the sensation making your core tighten. he hushes you softly, looking up at you eagerly, “shh, shh, honey, y’don’t need that shit with me, not now. gonna fuck you right here. now. you’re soaked already.” 

your heavy eyes stare into his own, nodding eagerly as the tip of his fingers bump against your clit, sending a jolt throughout your body. he moans with a short laugh, leaning in to press a messy kiss to your mouth, his other hand just above your ass. he taps your lower back, muttering, “come up here.. gonna have you sit on my cock.. get in as deep as i fucking can.”

you grunt at his words, whining, “fuck, please, ben..” as the sole thought of it sends pulses to your pussy. you nod frantically, immediately scooting closer on his lap to reach his member, kneeling on the sides of his body to lift yourself up. ben’s hand grips the base of his cock to lift it up, and he’s hard, the girth making you drool. you gulp, wondering how the fuck you’ll fit it in, but you’re too high to fucking care.

you position yourself above him, the fat head of it lined up to your cunt perfectly. his hand on your back helps you move closer, the tip nudging against your hole as both hands grip your hips now, fingers digging into your skin. you bite your lip as you look down at his cock, core tensing in preparation. staring into his eyes now, you move, lowering yourself slowly as your walls engulf him bit by bit, inch by inch.

both of you moan as you take him, clenching around him so much that you nearly see stars. you’re so tight around him, and he’s in heaven.

ben groans loudly as his eyes fix on your pussy, and it’s porn right in front of him. he sputters out mindless noises, gritting his teeth as you finally take him to the hilt, feeling his cock fill you up, nudging the deepest parts inside of you.

you hiss out as you sink, your thighs colliding with his own as you adjust to him. “you’re so fuckin’.. tight, oh fuck, sweetheart..” he whines out, and you’re relishing in this; in him. you start moving, hips involuntarily rocking against him as you move up and down. it’s messy; out of rhythm and desperate, but so fucking good.

“haven’t..” he grunts, gripping your hips harder for leverage, “fucked a pussy like this in a long fucking time.” his breaths grow louder the more you move, your throbbing hole just above the tip and slamming back down repeatedly. your core tightens as he starts to thrust up into you, meeting your synchronized movements immediately, and you cry out as you take it. 

you blabber out mindlessly at the sensation, incoherent whines and what seems to sound like ben’s name over and over again filling his ears, and he just laughs, lifting himself from the back of the chair to sit up, adjusting you with him. his chest meets your body, chin resting on your shoulder as his hand finds your hair, gripping it tightly and pushing your body into him. he’s flush against your skin as he huffs into your ear, the hot breath engulfing your brain. your fucked out head and blown, wide eyes.

he moves against you as you bounce on his cock, words spurring out with his harsh pants on your skin, fingers tightening into your hair, “no thoughts in this pretty head, huh? nothin’ but my fucking cock in this cunt. s’how it should be. pretty girls like you.. s’what you’re made for.. made for me.”

your head scrambles at his words; the way they’re so filthy, but most of all? 

because of how right he is.

he fits inside of you like a glove; a perfect hole that’s meant for him to fuck. it has your eyes lolling back over and over again, unable to truly focus on the task at hand. and when your movements begin to slow because of this, ben’s grip on you handles it for you, hips thrusting up into you aggressively. your stomach tightens repeatedly as the tip of his cock hits the deepest parts inside of you, practically bulging out with each hit into you, and it makes your pussy convulse around him, rambled noises escaping your lips.

“am i right, honey? are you made for me?” ben growls in your ear, his harsh grunts echoing, “fuckin’,” he huffs, “answer me..”

his words hardly register in your brain as you grow closer and closer to your release, short moans being the only thing you can muster out, along with a few noises that almost sound like ben’s name. “mmphf– b-be– ah–”

he shushes you, arms wrapped around your body, “don’t gotta think baby, just feel.. let me take you like this, just feel me..” ben whispers desperately into your ear, moving one of his hands to reach between you, the large palm pressing into your lower abdomen, “right fucking here. you’re gonna feel me for fucking days, baby.”

it has your stomach doing flips, body quivering against ben’s hold. your eyes shoot open as he begins to slow his thrusts, relying on pure power rather than speed now. his hips snap into you repeatedly, slow and deliberate as if he needs to make sure your body memorizes the shape of his cock.

and, knowing him? you probably will.

you know that you’ll never get fucked like this again. you know that you’re already completely ruined for any other man now. and a part of you’s okay with that.

his fingers gripping your hair. his hands digging into your skin. the strike of his hips, holding you captive for him as he takes you. how could you think of anything else?

ben’s power over you doesn’t relent at all, his super strength enough leverage to keep himself completely occupied. the hips slamming inside of you have you seeing stars now, your eyes threatening to twitch open in bliss as he buries himself in your throbbing cunt. you involuntarily flutter around him, walls pulsing as your core constricts.

you feel ben’s cock twitch inside of you, his moans growing heavier as he lets out a breathless laugh, “you’re so.. close, i can feel you, sweetheart..” he grunts and snarls, his thrusts quickening rapidly, “and you’re gonna come on my cock like the good girl you are.. while i fill you up.. make sure i stay in this sweet pussy forever.”

you cry out as that familiar heat in your stomach arises, blurting out nonsense, along with a, “p-please, ben, please–”, that leaves you panting.

“yeah, baby? want me to come inside of you, s’that it?”

you nod furiously, whining out as your face heats up at the thought, flush and its sensation overwhelming you. you’re hot all over, and you just need a release.

“that’s my girl.. my sweet girl. gonna come inside of you, give you what you need..” he breathes out against your ear, and before you realize it, you’re convulsing around his cock, yelping out as you come. your hands grip onto his back, his arms, anything you can hold onto as you ride through it.

“there we go, baby, just like that, my fuckin’ girl..” he encourages you, overstimulating you with his unrelenting hips as he buries himself inside of you over and over again, making you clench around him uncontrollably. you’re spewing out mindless moans as your walls spasm, and it makes ben whine. 

he grunts out rapidly, unable to control the noises he makes as his hands on your hips feel tight enough to leave bruises, “gonna.. gonna fuckin’, oh– fuck!–” he moans loudly, cutting himself off as he pushes you down to the hilt, cock twitching rapidly with his come spilling inside of you. you feel the streams of hot white bury inside of you, and you’re lightheaded at the feeling, the aftershocks of your orgasm forming tears in your eyes.

you whine against him as you hold on tight, his hips rocking into you as you both ride it out. it’s almost intimate at how breathless the two of you are, taking in each other completely.

he huffs against your skin, pressing a small kiss to your shoulder. it’s wordless, but it goes without saying. 

this was a moment you’d never forget. and you hoped that he wouldn’t either.

eventually, ben lifts your hips up, his cock sliding out of you as the mess you both made slips out of your cunt, making you whine at the feeling of his come falling out of you. the slick catches itself on his cock, spilling onto his grey sweats sloppily, and you can’t deny the twinge of arousal the sight brings you. leave that for another time.

you take a deep breath as you let out a small laugh, preparing to say something about getting up and cleaning yourself up, but to your surprise, ben’s arm holds onto your body tightly, lifting you up as his other hand shoves his sweats down, feet stepping out of them. he’ll deal with it later.

you yelp as he stands up fully with you in his arms, carrying you as he walks over to the shitty hotel bathroom, lowering you to stand in the bathtub. ben hums softly as he grabs a small rag, running warm water underneath it and squeezing out the excess water.

you’re in too much.. shock to bring yourself to say anything, but when he brings the rag to wipe your inner thighs and core, you let out a noise of surprise, cheeks warming up. who the fuck knew soldier boy could be so.. gentle?

he doesn’t look up at you as he continues. instead, he asks, “what? too hot?”

you let out a laugh, shaking your head. “no, just right.”

he lets out a satisfied noise as he finishes cleaning you up thoroughly, throwing the rag to the side as he grabs another one for himself, repeating the process. you watch him in awe as he does so, and you try your hardest to make sure you don’t fall in love with him.

but, when he carries you to the hotel bed and lays you down like you’re glass that might break, it seems a bit too late for that. and when he gets in that bed with you and holds you like his life depends on it? 

you know you’re done for, and you’re in for a ride.

[conflictofthemind]

Lucas knows about Mike and Will

First off, of course the context is needed that Lucas has known the two of them the longest out of any of the kids. He is Mike’s neighbour and joined their party even before Dustin. He also played wingman for Mike previously in S3, trying to help get Mike and Eleven back together. It’s not a stretch of the imagination that Lucas would end up in a role like that again.

So, the hospital scene at the end of Season 4.

There’s a few things within this scene that are a little suspicious, and then one big thing that basically has no explanation other than Lucas suspecting something is going on with Mike. I brightened the scene here- first let’s just acknowledge they held hands on Lucas’ back. This is the only kind of direct hand touch we get this season.

Lucas can’t see that.. but it’s on his back. Of course he would be able to feel it. It’s also another moment that separates Mike and Will as a pair, versus Eleven on her own. Here’s the full clip below. And then just LOOK at the expression Lucas gives Mike after he sees El lingering behind. Your friend just visited as soon as he possibly could to give you support. Why would you look at them like this after he hugs you? Because he knows there’s something weird going on in the relationship between Mike and El. No other explanation.

Lucas is clearly giving Mike a “what the fuck is going on” kind of expression, eye squinted, eyebrows furrowed. There’s also a blink and you’ll miss it moment where Mike’s breath catches after the contact with Will’s hand, and he makes a split second glance to look at their hands (which I captured in the first image).

Then after Lucas hugs El, he clearly parts and steps back to give room for Mike to join beside his girlfriend. But Mike crosses the room to put himself in between El and Will instead. Another thing Lucas would have found weird. Lucas isn’t dumb.

Then we have the shotlisting post from Ross’ instagram. Shot listing is where they plan out what happens within an episode and what kinds of shots they want. This image is obviously an Easter Egg for fans about who’s interacting with who in the first 2 episodes (ie Stonathan shenanigans of which we already know about). I didn’t see it at first but Lucas is clearly placed in the centre of a triangle between El, Mike, and Will. He’s the centre of the triangle.

This makes sense with what we know about S5 thus far as well. There’s a confirmed plot line that has Dustin trying to isolate himself from the rest of the group (if he hasn’t already been isolated enough from the party in recent seasons). It shows up in the shot list image too of course, with Dustin on the opposite side. For the kids, due to Max being out of commission, the only interactions we are going to get in the first two episodes before the time jump seem to be between El, Will, Mike, and Lucas. We also have confirmation from Millie that El and Lucas will be spending a lot more time together than they had in previous seasons.

Moving onto a bit of cornplating for the last points which just serve as some cherries on top of this theory - we already have imagery of Lucas acting as a bridge between Mike and Will in the party image Ross gave us. This is post time jump most likely because of the new outfits, so it’s interesting that this role could continue throughout the season.

We also have the imagery of Lucas holding a suspiciously coloured blue and yellow shield in Will’s painting of the party. A bit of a stretch, sure. But complied with everything else it is definitely interesting to consider.

Now for the character reasoning, which is always important to consider: why would Lucas end up in this position?

Lucas is going through his girlfriend being in a coma after they had a major distance in their relationship. A coma that Lucas in universe has no clue if she’ll ever wake up from, and realistically (in-universe) hopes are slim that she will recover. And if she does, she may not have all the memories of times spent together still with her. There’s probably so many regrets swirling around his mind of things he could have done or said in the time that they had together. Lucas doesn’t have this luxury - but his friends still do.

Lucas is Mike’s oldest friend outside of Will, and Will/Mike are Lucas’ first friends. They existed as a party even before Dustin.

Out of his pain of ‘losing’ Max and the wisdom he learned from it, I really do think Lucas is going to encourage Mike to seize the day and take control of his life once again. Will and Mike still have the luxury of time and still have chance. If anyone could convince Mike his feelings are reciprocal, it would also be Lucas.

Furthermore, Lucas understands that as a black man in fairly rural 80s Indiana, his relationship with Max is also one that is singled out due to prejudice against interracial couples. Interracial marriage would only have been legalized less than twenty years ago. It’s not quite the same, but again if anyone understood the position Mike would be in (other than say Robin) - it would be Lucas.

[pastelpinkkadan]

My most blunt, controversial ACOTAR opinions. Nothing is safe, nothing is sacred. Mind the tags for your own peace of mind please.

P.S.: Absolutely not directed at any other blog/person specifically. Just general fandom/shippers.

Elriel/Gw*nriel:

Gwyn is not that important of a character. She is a secondary character whose main purpose in the story was to be Nesta’s friend. She has no connection to any overarching plot. She could literally never be seen again in the books and all the main plot points would still work.

People have inflated Gwyn’s character and importance solely because they ship her with Azriel. And they ship her with Azriel because 1. She is the only other single female character (besides Elain) that he has interacted with. 2. Gwyn is enough of a blank slate for people to project/self insert themselves into and thereby romance themselves with Azriel 3. Gwyn has only been shown in a positive light, with only positive personality traits (good friend and can wield a sword) so there’s no REAL controversy on her character/personality. Because there’s not enough to actually have any controversy.

If Gwyn was actually that important, Emerie would also be as important, if not more so. But 90% of time Emerie is forgotten by the fandom. Even to the point that the theory of an Illyrian plot is somehow given to Az and Gwyn, rather than Emerie. The two people that, arguably, have the least skin in the game concerning that theory. And the reason Emerie is this pushed out of her own potential story line is because she isn’t shipped with Azriel or another Fae male.

If there was no Bonus Chapter Gw*nriel would not exist. Or at the VERY least, it would be acknowledged as the crackship that it is. Because outside of the BC, there is nothing in the main ACOSF to accurately ship them to the degree that the fandom does. Elriel, however, still has several books where canon scenes have taken place. The BC is absolutely not needed to show that Elriel have feelings for each other, we already knew.

“Well Elain gave by TruthTeller, so Elriel isn’t end game!” Is one of the stupidest reaches I’ve seen. TruthTeller was always, OBVIOUSLY, meant to be something lent to Elain for the war. It wasn’t a permanent gift, and Az didn’t say it was. He said he wouldn’t use it TODAY, implying he would expect to use it again in the future. Imagine -

“Well Gwyn gave back the books Nesta recommended to her, so they obviously aren’t friends.”

Thats what y’all sound like. It’s just purposely misinterpreting things in a scene that obviously aren’t there for the sake of your ship. It’s disingenuous and not at all the win you think it is.

You cannot call Azriel an incel/fuck boy for Elain and then ship him with Gwyn in the same breath. If he’s all those things with Elain, he’ll be the same for Gwyn. She is not magically going to make him “better” or a gentleman. Actually, he’s already a gentleman. He just didn’t have sexual thoughts about Gwyn and y’all can’t stand it.

Same vein, but if Azriel had had those sexual thoughts in the BC about anyone else besides Elain there would have been no issue/debate.

If a Gw*nriel book did somehow happen, it would 1000% be for fan service/peer pressure. No previous books have set it up, even the main story in ACOSF. Elriel has been setting up since book 2. It makes sense. Anyone who says it doesn’t just doesn’t want it to happen, mostly because they don’t like Elain. And that’s also mostly because they can’t see themselves in Elain, so they lash out.

Saying Elriels are delusional is the wildest thing, because Elriels have the most canon scenes spread throughout the books, Elain and Azriel have interacted with each other positively the most and the longest, and they are the only potential couple that actually bluntly like each other. They exist outside of misinterpreted bonus chapters and “what if” theories with no real backing.

Elain:

Whether anyone wants to admit it or not, part of the Elain hate IS misogyny. The amount of hate this character receives, compared to what she has actually done in the series, is entirely undeserving. She has received the same level of hate, if not more, than Tamlin, any of the ACOTAR villains, and Nesta, who is still a very controversial character. And for what? Liking Azriel, and not wielding a sword while doing it, apparently.

Elain liking flowers does not determine who she’ll end up with. For fucks sake we didn’t know Nesta liked to read smut or was great dancer until her book. And neither of those things determined her partner. It’s just what she likes. Same with Elain.

Nessian/ACOSF

The idea that Nesta will leave Cassian and make her own court is stupid.

Being anti-ACOSF but Pro-Nesta is a streeeeeetch, because all of Nesta’s actual good character development came from ACOSF. Like, did you like that she was angry and unhealed before? Because that’s where she would still be without all that happened in ACOSF.

People don’t understand the intervention that HAD to happen with Nesta in ACOSF. And I would even venture to say that most people against it have never HAD to have a real intervention with someone to that level. The level of, go to rehab/therapy or you are not allowed to be in my house/take up my resources. Because you will not get better on your own, you will only hurt yourself or others and I won’t enable you anymore. It’s a difficult decision that but often it is NECESSARY. Speaking as someone with several addict family members.

El*cien/Lucien:

All the theories about an El*cien plot line are completely focused on Lucien, and ignore everything built up with Elain. It’s always about Lucien figuring out his heritage, becoming some High Lord of one of the courts, or something with the Band of Exiles. Elain doesn’t have to be involved for any of that to happen. She’s pushed to the side in her own romantic story line. Nothing about her Seer powers, or the fact that she’s apparently been gaining spy abilities, or her place at the Night Court.

Lucien fans make me hate Lucien more than Lucien ever could.

The poor Lulu mindset can die.

While we’re at it, the theory that Elain likes Lucien so much that she avoids him is also stupid. That makes no sense. She loses her boldness around. She got better WHEN HE LEFT. All of Elain’s most powerful moments are when Lucien isn’t around. And that says something.

People cling to 1st book Lucien so much, but he has not been that way SINCE book 1.

Tamlin:

Tamlin already got a redemption arc when he brought Rhys back to life. He doesn’t need another one, and he certainly doesn’t need a full book.

The Tamlin/Elain ship is stupid and only benefits Tamlin, not Elain. Once again placing Elain to the side of her own romance, much like El*cien.

ACOTAR:

If you hate everyone in the IC, you don’t actually like ACOTAR. They’re the majority of the books, including half of ACOSF. And it’s actually really stupid to hate the IC and still pretend you’re an ACOTAR fan. Because, again, the IC is the MAJORITY of ACOTAR. Please read something you actually like.

If you hate the entire main story and main characters of ACOTAR, but like one or two characters, you don’t like ACOTAR. You see yourself in a character, and want the story to reflect what YOU want to happen to that character (ie, yourself), and can’t handle that it didn’t. You don’t actually like the ACOTAR series. Again, maybe it’s time to read something else.

3 Acherons x 3 Bat Boys isn’t cliche. It’s a pattern. It’s a literary motif. It’s a theme. It is a pattern that SJM has naturally set up, the fact that you can see and assume that Elriel would be apart of that just means you can recognize basic literary devices in a fantasy novel. Which is the POINT.

I have no intention of debating anything. I’m just stating my opinions on my blog, like everyone else gets to do. So take that as you will.

Anyways, thanks for coming to my TedTalk.

[anewstartrekfan]

Reading an old Star Trek book and to my surprise Jim Kirk has always had Daddy issues

So the only Star Trek book I’ve read was the one explaining how the tribbles episode was made and the aftermath, so trying to read Enterprise (1986) with some basic knowledge of trek post 2009 is fascinating. Cuz you see where the breadcrumbs of some of the characterization and even backstory come from.

In chapter 2, Sam Kirk and Kirk’s mom show up to Kirk’s ceremony where he takes command of the enterprise. They talk about George Kirk Sr. being in Starfleet, (he’s dead here too) something that I don’t think was in any of the episodes or movies. And how he was always distant and away. And they’re clearly going for some parallels/dramatic irony with the Wrath of Khan when it comes to Kirk not believing he could’ve developed a relationship with his father as an adult. And it plays into the tragic aspect I love about Kirk.

Upon reflection he’s happy that Carol rejected him (he proposed to her in chapter 1) because he doesn’t want to leave anyone behind while on the job, only returning for sparse visits the way his father did. But at the same time, Jim craves companionship. And he can’t get it in his current job because as captain, it is not ethical for him to date anyone else on the Enterprise.

Anyway the long and short is if we take this book into account, Kirk has always had daddy issues. It’s just in TOS EU it was abandonment issues whereas in 2009 it was dad sacrificed himself so high expectations issues.

The little details like the mom’s name getting carried over into the aos movies are a good touch, but then seeing George Kirk being a Starfleet officer actually get incorporated into the 2009 movie as an important plot point, and then also using his absence in Kirk’s life but just in a different way as part of Kirk’s backstory is so cool to me.

A difference though is unlike fanfic tropes, Winona is actually a good mom and wants Jim to succeed in his career where his father failed in his Starfleet career. Unfortunately though Jim appears to be falling into the same pitfalls. As in lack of communication and unwillingness to play workplace politics.

That last burn from Winona tho… like damn girl I felt that.

Another thing I want to backtrack to, Sam Kirk. Sam being the alleged chosen child, the one that was supposed to follow in George Kirk’s footsteps but didn’t, and then Jim strolled in and did even more than what Sam was supposed to do, and Sam and George never reconciled. Like dudes this book is almost 40 years old and this stuff was in strange new worlds last year. Tho xenobiology appears to have morphed into xenoanthropology (tho according to the fan wiki he’s still a biologist so idk what the deal is)

For the record Sam’s characterization isn’t remotely the same here. Likely the choice to keep him out of Starfleet all together removed any sort of resentment of Jim potential like he has in SNW. There’s still tension though, as Sam tries to force Jim to confront why he’s reacting like this to his first mission for the enterprise being an escort job for a flying horse.

Shifting gears back to Jim needing to learn how to play workplace politics. The assumed reason for Pike leaving the enterprise. While SNW is doing the whole, Pike knows he won’t fly the enterprise forever and about the disfigurement and is cool with it, I find if fascinating that he’s more, sad about it here and that he got promoted out of the way for pushing too many buttons. It would be a sad ending but I wonder if SNW would incorporate that into its eventual ending. Hell I wonder if that’s what happened to Kirk between TOS and TMP.

Anyway big picture is this book is a fascinating time capsule and it’s fun seeing just how much has stuck around over the years both in fandom and in the franchise itself. Whether or not that’s the book’s doing is questionable but still. Fun to think about.

[comedicjustice]

It’s Kinger’s Fault.

…

Twenty five. Twenty five percent of all marriages end in a divorce due to domestic abuse.

Thirty four of people in domestic abuse relationships end up dying because of it.

Now, don’t take this as me saying Kinger is physically abusive. All of the episodes thus far show that he isn’t a very physical person. Besides that one part when he had a gun- but that’s unimportant right now. Kinger never laid a hand on Queenie unless it was to embrace her in her final moments. He was a good man… but I have reason to believe he was a horrible husband.

‼️SPOILERS FOR TADC EPISODE THREE‼️

‼️YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED‼️

Episode three gave us a lot in terms of character growth for both Zooble and Kinger. While I love a good B plot that’s bound to play in edits with Will Wood songs, I want to focus on the star of this episode.. Kinger.

Kinger is a sweet guy. A little confused due to him slowly loosing his memory, but he plays an important role. He’s a good guy and always has the best intentions for others. Often comforting them when they’re feeling down. As seen with Ragatha in episode two! When Kinger had the bucket over his head and was able to revert back to himself, he found the words needed to comfort Ragatha. Then it’s shown he does the same again in episode three, where he holds and reassures Pomni. Opening up his own troubles to her.

What a sweet guy!! Telling her all this things like-

“You’re very strong, Pomni.”

“Things will be okay.”

“The worst thing you can do is make someone feel like they’re not loved or wanted-”

I’m sorry.. WHAT?! That usually isn’t something you say to someone while retelling your own story and comforting the one they’re currently living. Not unless it’s something you have direct experience with. Let’s go over the facts.

As explained by Ragatha in the pilot: “when you reach your breaking point, something really terrible can happen.” That terrible thing being abstraction.

Kinger and Queenie fell in love and married in the circus.

Kinger can’t remember the string of events leading up to Queenie’s abstraction.

Now how do any of these points tie into one another? I am so happy you didn’t ask! Most may be wondering how exactly Kinger and Queenie fell in love and “married” in the circus. Well, we know that those in the circus remember next to nothing about their personal lives including their names (Besides slight references to things outside their world every once in a while for a good laugh). So it’s unlikely that they entered the circus together as a couple, but rather fell in love and used each other as a rock to combat the insanity. Queenie went into the circus remembering her love for bugs like how Gange remembered her love for body pillows. Both Kinger and Ragatha remember their disliking/fear of bugs. Despite this, Queenie was able to help Kinger overcome his distaste.

Plus, it just made sense for them to get together. They were both apart of the same set.

Now as for Kinger not remembering the events that lead to her abstraction? That part is especially important. Now it’s common for those who harm others to claim they don’t remember anything. I don’t think that’s the case with Kinger. I believe it was more of a disassociation, which is also incredibly common in these kinds of situations. People tend to disassociate as a coping mechanism to the own harm they’re causing. Their brain is unable to handle the stress they’re releasing which leads them to completely placing the memory somewhere out of reach. Thus allowing the person to continue living their daily life.

Symptoms of disassociation actually overlap with amnesia. In which case a person is left with gaps in their memory and cannot recall certain events unless coping mechanisms or creative therapies take place. Kind of like how Kinger surrounds himself in darkness. Don’t you think?

Of course, this all only leads up to my biggest fact.. which is what Ragatha said to Pomni: “when you reach your breaking point, something really terrible can happen.”

And what Kinger said to Pomni: “The worst thing you can do is make someone feel like they’re not loved or wanted.”

As I said before, it is highly likely- might even be a fact that Kinger and Queenie fell in love and married in the circus. Used each other as a rock. From how Kinger described Queenie, she was quite the woman to experience love with. Kinger, however, was her everything. (I’m sure she was everything to Kinger as well, but you don’t realize that sort of thing until it’s too late).

When your everything makes you feel so unwanted.. so unloved.. you begin to spiral. Your purpose of making sure they’re safe and happy has ultimately failed and you become nothing. Kinger obviously did or said something that made someone as brilliant as Queenie feel worthless. Something that made her spiral and become abstracted. We will never know what exactly was done because he can’t remember.

We know he’s trying to make up for it though. His current relationship with the other members proves he’s trying to do better and make them feel wanted. Give them the warmth he couldn’t provide to his own wife. But you cannot undo your mistakes like a messed up code- which he has a collage degree in! Kinger is becoming a better person and is slowly on a path of redemption. Improving himself from a version of him we never got to see and very likely never will.

Kinger and Queenie were doomed from the start. They may have been apart of the same set, but being on opposing teams meant that one had to take the other.

And someone lost their queen…

BUT HEY!! This is basically all speculation and technically a theory. Or the ramblings of a crazy person who once got their hand stuck in the door handle of a fridge. You can decide whether to cry or roll your eyes and scroll. Hope you all had fun reading- BYEEEEEEEE!!!

[possumdrawsstuff]

THAT SCAR REF SHEET I WAS TALKING ABT FOR JIM!

all of these r based off stuff that happened in canon, if you think I’ve missed any cool opportunities then feel free to point them out! I add them because I believe that while they probably couldn’t have been included in the show for the pg rating and some of the ways he would’ve gained them being somewhat violent (even for trollhunters). I feel they add to his character and in how they would grow over time show how he would gain more and more experience as a trollhunter, yet also gaining more and more pressure and experiences that are probably not the best on jim mentally.

(Ps. I have no lightning scars In my design because lichtenberg scars, while cool looking, don’t usually last)

(Ps ps, the model I used to plan them out is from sketch fab somewhere but as I had originally not made this to post I didn’t save it, if anybody knows the creator, or is the creator, feel free to hit me up and I’ll credit you in the post.

ANYWAY MOVING ON TO THE SCARS AND MY SILLY LITTLE REASONS FOR THEM BEING THEREEE!

This is prolly gonna be angsty but I have an angsty ao3 background (to whoever read my Peter Parker nwh fic yall know ,and I am sorry I haven’t updated lol)

face/ eyebrow scar: I love that they gave him a scar in the movie, however, I didn’t like how it looked very much, especially with how he got it. I mean ARRRGHHH! Literally punched him so hard (love him Frfr but bro was not messing around even w Jim) that stone on stone had enough force to scratch some off of his face, this is why I usually make it look messier and more like scratchy scars rather than the clean cut from wizards/the unspeakable movie

2. GOBLIN/GENERAL SCARS: ok y’all I haven’t seen many other people do these but they are ver important to me 😌. Just scars from sparring could be all of these, the heroes forge has literal flying axes like ?? and in earlier seasons he didn’t always have his armor on or have a helmet at his disposal so I think he would to have had to have been nicked pretty good at least once or twice. Then there’s the goblin scars, In my version they told Barbara that it was racoons that got him , but the idea is that for Jim to have landed in the hospital he must have been hurt pretty badly that night, so, I would imagine that even while facing nomura Jim was fighting against the effects of blood loss also.

3.Angor rot: if you couldn’t tell by the photo it doesn’t show up in this! HOWEVER in my silly little side project (I’m sure some of you can probably guess what it is and if you can’t, idk look at some of my reblogs and you’ll probably find it, BUT! because it takes place after canon (yes including the movie) but also has some crunchy plot twisting In the background, the angry rot man face thing (I cant remember the name of it right now for the life of me please) will show up whenever he comes near to Jim, even if time is messed up, angor rot is back and technically hasn’t died yet so yes Jim gets the spoopy glowy thing.

4.amulet scar: idk if anybody remembers but when the arcane order took Jim’s amulet, he got scars from it right? It can be seen on his beast design is all of the tendrils leeching out from the indent of the amulet, my thinking is if his human form also got scarred by ARRGHHH! Why didn’t this scar translate too? Then again it could’ve but Jim is obviously a big fan of blue jacket*tm* so we will never know, I think he did but idk 🤷‍♀️

5.Bellroc- HEY SO ANYBODY REMEMBER WHEN BELLROC LITERALLY IMPALES JIM ON HER FLAMING STAFF!?! AND HE JUST KEPT GOING AFTER GETTING THE ARMOR!?! LIKE HE DIDNT JUST GET IMPALED? (This is partly why I think he gets like an adrenaline rush magic thingy as seen in some fic i read at some point PLEASE TELL ME IF ITS YOUR FIC I LOST IT PLEASE) YA that’s gonna leave a mark! the wound I’m guessing instantly cauterized so while yes it would hurt really bad I take that as why he was just running around after the armor.

6.burnt hand, another thing that happened in the movie but didn’t really get wrapped up in the end, Jim burnt his left hand on the gaggletac (idk how to spell it) and it just stayed bandaged for the rest of the movie, so it is also included on this list

7.back scars from bular: this one is probably the stretchiest one in this list but I think that it would have been an AMAZING addition to the plot character development wise. In one scene we see bular literally crushing and sliding Jim up the bridges interior wall and Jim is literally like silently screaming in this scene (thank you Guillermo /im sad for my son) and I like to think that after rushing over and doing Romeo and Juliet, Jim got off stage, practically ran over some people trying to get home because he can feel it, the whole play. This gives him some insight on the dangers of troll hunting. Yes I know this was a lesson beforehand but this is in the arc along with the goblins where Jim is learning he’s going to have to make personal sacrifices to keep up this troll hunting thing, including his mental health probably , it will serve as a very physical reminder of the constant danger he is now and will probably forever be in (in case y’all couldn’t tell that I’ve watched Spider-Man nwh like 8 times I’m out for blood on this one)

8.face scar from morgana: slinging the mood back around and also calling back to the “scars gained while Jim is a troll also get applied to his human form”, in like one of the last episodes maybe 2nd to last or the very last one in the final battle with morgana, she scratches Jim’s cheek with a throwing dagger and from what I can remember I thought it actually stayed on his face throughout the end of the series, I could be deluxe but I still like to add it for some reminder of the OG final battle.

not mentioned here- little pit in the amulet indention from the dark shard, and various scars from the dark lands.

if you read that entire rant I’m sorry , enjoy!

[confirmeddead]

Going into season two, I was basically fifty-fifty if DM had happened in the past, I was also already okay with a reinterpretation of DM - in which past DM didn’t happen. Especially after the season premier, because I thought the tension between Daniel and Armand was great. I’m a little sad though that Daniel is already a vampire, because so much of what makes the DM relationship interesting and compelling is kinda related to it. I just don’t want it to be a cookie-cutter enemies-to-lovers - I can’t help but feel that would be a bit shallow. I want the relationship to have some depth and be actually romantic - you know? I see some speculation about a reverse chase, which could be cool - but Daniel doesn’t have a reason to chase Armand if he was turned out of spite. Unless he wants revenge, which given San Francisco is fair enough I guess. Also Rolin stating that the turning won’t be shown at any point and the decision not to show it made me lose some faith in the investment of the writers in the relationship tbh. I understand not showing it in s2 but never? I just feel like it’s even more of an important event if pastDM isn’t a thing. I’m happy to be proven wrong here, but I don’t know if I dare believe in what they have planned… but I’ll try to be more optimistic!

The three somewhat possible ”clues”/”hints” which might foreshadow a past DM are for me 1) Daniel’s comments about his memories of the 70s being ”all a blur” and waking up without any memory in a parking lot in Milwaukee 2) JA’s comments in the TV insider interview:  “But I will say, I think that Louis and Daniel, maybe there was more there. I’m going to get in so much trouble,” he giggles. “I’m going to start talking about it all.” 3) The comment about Daniel feeling freer to hold Alice’s hand in Paris.

To go into more detail:

1. Could be nothing, just a way for the writers to add some context to Daniel believing at some point that he did black out, as it becomes more believable for Daniel to believe that if his memories of that time are somewhat muddled in general. However, that line of dialogue does feel a bit like a foreshadowing line - as if there is something more about this very specific mention of an instance of memory loss. And if there is, it raises the possibility of a book similarity, in which Armand after imprisoning Daniel decides to stalk and follow him. In the show it would ostensibly be to find out what makes him ’fascinating’

2. JA’s comments are wild! What is he referring to? One way to interpret them could be that he is implying that there might be some sexual tension between Louis and Daniel, which might be revisited next season. “I’m going to start talking about it all.” does sound like someone talking about future plot lines. Another reading could be that there has been some sort of relationship between them in the past, which is to be revealed. This is especially interesting given that scene in s2e2 where Daniel asks about, and Louis and Armand tell him, about all the ’young men’ they would date/drain. Th framing of that scene, with Daniel at one point in-between Louis and Armand, could be read as foreshadowing a revelation that Daniel was at one point of of these young men. Of course, again this could be nothing. Just simple foreshadowing of s2e5, about specifically Louis draining the young gay men of San Francisco. I would not say it foreshadows Daniel’s encounter with the two of them, since that had already been revealed in earlier episodes (even Armand being asked to ’join’).

3. This one I’m the most doubtful about. I don’t believe in general that Armand is being kind to Daniel in this scene. I believe that he is actually going full ”manipulative gremlin” and trying to divide and conquer Louis and Daniel, to ensure the truth of the trial and San Francisco doesn’t come out. He is the one who in the previous episode told Louis that they together could bring the more manageable ’boy’ back (and starts off the whole thing of digging into Daniel’s past with Alice) and in the next episode he tries to apologize to Daniel on Louis’ behalf. Armand telling Daniel about Alice’s reasoning behind her refusal, can also be read as a form of intimidation - similar to how Louis asks if they should look into what Alice thinks of Daniel now. He does arguably try to hold back Louis a bit at one point, which could be an acknowledgement of them going too far and being hurtful (or being him as speculated being caring of Daniel since they have a past) but could also be Armand starting to try to play the ’diplomat’ or ’nice vampire’ to Daniel. The reason Daniel gets a PTSD-flashback is also in my mind not because there’s a connection between Armand and Alice, a take I still see here and there, but because Louis diving into his memories and bringing them up is so similar to Armand doing it that it triggers a flashback. However, with all of that said - what does Louis mean when he states that Daniel felt freer to hold Alice’s hand in Paris? It could be a reference to Daniel walking around in Paris with a guy (who would be Armand), finding it easier to deal with his internalized homophobia in a country where no one knows him, but could also be as others have speculated, that Alice is not white. The thing that does invite speculation about this is that they don’t reveal what the reason is, but this could be because at some point the idea was to actually show scenes of Daniel and Alice in Paris as they were brought up. So perhaps, that was cut because it wasn’t deemed necessary, leaving us with a bit of an unresolved comment.

Overall I find JA’s comments to be the most compelling possible clue. Also because I feel that the scene of Louis and Armand telling Daniel about their ’young men’ hasn’t really been resolved? But that could be nothing. However, if Louis dated Daniel together with Armand in the 70’s I can’t believe that Louis wouldn’t’ tell Daniel, especially after their connection at the end of s2e5. An easy reason could be that Armand erased Louis’ memories and that he did this simultaneously as he erased Louis’ true memories of the San Fransisco incident. This would also explain why Armand used the language of ”abandoning him” when referring to leaving Daniel. But, that would mean that Louis and Armand at some point decided to reconnect with Daniel after they left him at the drug den, which doesn’t seem very likely to me. Possibly Daniel sought them out again - similar to seeking out Lestat in the book, as he does not remember Armand torturing him. However in such case, Daniel’s last memory of Louis is the latter attacking him, which would be sufficient reason for Daniel to not seek him out. So while I’m intrigued by JA’s comments and would find a past DM-plot line compelling I don’t know if I believe that where the show is going.

What do you think? Any clues you find more or less compelling? I would very much like to hear about where you think the DM relationship is going/how it will play out - and what you would like to see? Especially if, as I agree is likely, pastDM won’t be a thing. Thank you! Sorry for long post!

So I actually have an idea as to why Daniel would reverse chase Armand!

Daniel’s background in investigative journalism and “nailing” the subject (no matter how difficult) is one of the main reasons he pursued Louis.

Let’s take Louis’ words as fact and agree it was out of spite (and Armand is gone)- do we really think DANIEL would just sit back and shrug it off? He’s independent and wouldn’t need as much guidance as book Daniel, sure, but if there’s one thing Daniel doesn’t do is drop the freaking subject. He keeps at it, even at a detriment to himself (continuing to poke at Louis even after Louis messed with his Parkinson’s in s1).

I get the whole enemies to lovers comment you make, but I think it’s little more nuanced than that given the SF event and Armand’s overall history. I made a post a week ago saying it’s SO fucked that even after everything that happened in SF, Paris, with Louis, and what Daniel will learn Armand did in Lestat’s past, Daniel will STILL go to Armand.

Daniel has gone through two divorces, has two kids, two Pulitzers, etc. like this guy has so much history with relationships and is an overall incredibly intelligent man (albeit a little self-destructive) and will still go to the evil, evil Gremlin that is the vampire Armand. It’s kind of hilarious.

Okay, Rolin’s comments regarding the turning were very odd to me and still kind of irk me tbh. Like it was such a pivotal moment for Armand and he shrugged it off. I gotta remember Hannah’s comments regarding this and her trying to calm the fans down about Armand’s character arc. They 100% know it pissed fans off (and annoyed Eric and Assad), so maybe they have something on the back burner regarding that? Just a thought!

Regarding your theories-

1. I 100% believe Armand followed Daniel throughout the years because we can all agree he can never let anything go EVER. Also, if this were true I’d be interested to know why he still didn’t want Louis to do the interview (besides the SF erasure)… maybe seeing him again would spark his fascination.

2. Jacob is a Devil’s Minion fan so I do think his little comments come from something. I’m actually making a big post on this and why I believe it’s literally in the script. I don’t know how much Jacob would know outside his own character arc but the scripts might have been very telling…

3. They may have been doing a good cop, bad cop thing but I do think Armand felt some sort of pity for Daniel, especially if we believe he was there the day of the proposal (doing his stalker stuff). I think the constant Alice comments are going to be important in season 3, especially with Daniel facing his immortality and likely having to contact his family. We’ll see more about this, I’m sure, especially with Lestat bringing up his own family dynamic (Gabrielle having to watch her own family die, Lestat’s estrangement with her, etc). Maybe getting to see Daniel’s thoughts about his family and his own maker in contrast with Lestat’s?

Overall I’m excited to see where they’ll go. My biggest concern isn’t the will they/won’t they (because we know they will) but moreso how much present-day Armand we’ll even get. Really biased look at things because I know it’s TVL time (and Louis is still a main character!), but it genuinely spooks me that we might not see him til Lestat meets him in 1700s Paris.

I want more Luke, I want conflicted feelings about his (Daniel’s) maker, and I would very much like at least one present day Armand and Daniel interaction to kickoff a 🤞season 4 🤞Devil’s Minion storyline (literally NO excuses, Rolin! It’s QotD!)

Thanks again for your ask and sorry for the delayed reply!

[kiirotoao]

Can we talk about Mileven for a minute. Another reason I don't buy their romantic relationship is the fact that most of their one on ones as a romantic couple (S3) are comedic and not very serious. Where are the deep conversations and when are we ever shown how much they understand each other... post (S2). It's almost like once they started dating they became a joke? Yes they have a few sweet moments but it's also scripted to be laughable. (S4) never showed them having a honest deep convo resolving issues and growing romantically. It could happen in (S5) but at this point I don't see the emotional romantic draw.

And then there is Byler to compare it to, where most of their one on ones are much much more serious, deep, heartfelt, with actual evidence of understanding and talks involving their feelings (which Mike seems to not have an issue with unlike his plot in S4 with El). This, mind you, happens to some degree in every season with Will. If Mike just sees Will as his best friend, why is he so serious about Will especially alone together. Even best friends are more casual then this.

Also a side note. The (S3) Mileven straight stereotype of the 'lazy, lying, clueless boy' dating the 'girl who is playing hard to get to teach her boyfriend a lesson' troupe is icky and makes me want El to find her power solo and Mike to remember that the old Mike (who has a special will voice) is a much better person and boyfriend. Thoughts?

Damn! Well said, dear anon!! I couldn’t agree more.

To anyone who says anything along the lines of ‘oh, Mleven can’t be broken up, they’ve been building up this whole time!’ Or ‘here’s the slow burn everyone wanted,’ or ‘Mike and El have grown so much even after fighting,’ I really don’t understand how any of that is founded. I totally agree and I feel like their relationship has been rather unserious. Even in the most serious love-centered topics of support (s1), connection (s2), breakups (s3), and expression (s4), it’s really interesting to me how their relationship has consistently lacked depth.

Despite dealing with some of the most important aspects of strong relationships, they aren’t close enough to showing, providing, or proving to have one. Mike supports El in season 1 as she does him, protecting and aiding each other with their strengths. But… so does everyone in that season to each other? The only difference is that Mike sheltered El which is very sweet, but not inherently romantic.

Then there’s season 2, which I must confess - I think that their reunion scene at the end of the season remains one of the sweetest moments on the show. Ever. It’s raw and emotional, and this was the closest thing we got to something romantic. But what shoots it down is the fact that their emotion was due to forced separation and Mike’s very real complex grief which gets completely glossed over in the show. So, I don’t know. It’s tricky. So are they romantic yet? They get virtually no time together. It’s a no for me.

And oh yeah, season 3 was the peak of unserious-ness. I also don’t enjoy that trope of ‘the boy chasing the girl who just doesn’t get it yet and she snubs him until the very end’ kind of energy. I swear that that stuff is littered in family-friendly movies usually as comedic relief, and Mike and El just barely made that trope more serious at the very least. Their breakup is dramatized and humorous, and the way that it’s mended still makes me chuckle. Mike offers her M&Ms, compliments her looks, they smile at each other, and suddenly they’re all good again? Yeah, that’s not very clear romance to me. All season long, they keep resisting each other. Mike lashes out to everyone and declares that he loves El but can’t say it to her face, and El has Max’s words tattooed on her heart that she keeps asserting that she deserves trust. The two just don’t quite reach each other that season. The second that I heard Hopper say that they’ve only been kissing all Summer long without complaining about them talking, I knew that I was not going to be invested in their relationship this season.

And so season 4 was truly the nail in the coffin, the final turning point. They’re not only shallow in making up, they’re shallow in being together. El isn’t honest with Mike about her time in Lenora, how she’s spent it, the people she’s met, the fun she’s truly having. Mike snaps about Will being disinterested, so it’s pretty clear that he was dishonest about his true feelings that day, too. And the most telling part is that he’s not mad at El. He’s mad at Will.

I think that what the writers have done is craft something so deeply intricate and hidden with Mike and Will to the point of confusion in much of the audience today. Will has always been a buffer of affection for Mike. In season 1 he’s the one they’re searching for. In season 2, he’s the one that Mike protects. In season 3, he’s the true breakup that Mike fights for. In season 4, he’s the listening ear and bleeding heart that Mike relies on. Their love only gets stronger and stronger whereas Mike and El are simply loving under the guise of physical closeness. I seriously think that that’s all that they have for each other.

That hug sequence at the end of season 4 really shocked me, because when I saw Mike and El hugging (not to mention that shot with Will right between them) I thought that it was sweet, but then suddenly Will and El are hugging, the siblings who are absolutely platonic, and it felt more emotional than Mike and El’s embrace. So not only are Mike and El visually equated to a platonic relationship, but their bond doesn’t even hold the same weight as the sibling-hood of Will and El.

It’s just wild to me that people don’t see it. I think that Byler is made abundantly clear for us to root for. The crazy together scene did it for me the first time I saw it. It was and still is one of my favorite scenes ever because it’s the total package. Closeness? Check. Honesty? Check. Hurt/comfort? Check. Matching, nerdy Halloween outfits? Check. The lack of anyone or anything else to distract them? Check. The crazy together scene is a marker of their relationship, and it never, ever dies.

Even though they fight, where are they years later? They’ve gone through supernatural and personal troubles together, and they’re still by each other’s side. “Friends. Best friends.” The same at heart. They promise to support each other, they reconnect, they come back from every breakup, and they readily express things on their minds and hearts. They’re there for each other and tell each other things that no other boys in the party have told each other.

Mike and El try to understand each other, they do, and sometimes it’s just trying that’s enough, but on a truly intimate level, that’s bullshit. Mike and Will have everything that they need and want for each other, and there’s no going through hoops to get it besides internalized homophobia. Which I very well think can be reasonably addressed next season.

So yep. Byler is endgame.

[historicallyaccuratecheese]

I’ve now gotten halfway through Season 2 of The Magnus Archives, so as per usual, here is my fifth post detailing my thoughts, analysis and theories on every episode, this time with a focus on Episodes 51-60!

Sorry that this one’s taken longer than usual to write, unfortunately I’ve had a few things clashing with the time I spend to listen to tma and write these recently, but hopefully I’ll be able to get back on track soon enough! Also…I’m gonna be real with you, these are just getting longer and longer as I descend down the rabbit hole, so I once again urge you to take your time reading this if you’re at all interested.

As always, please don’t spoil any future episodes for me, and if you haven’t gotten this far in tma then…here’s your spoiler warning for everything up until Episode 60! And finally, I recommend you read my previous posts of this nature, as I will be referencing my thoughts and theories from those in here. There’s a link to the masterpost containing all of them right above the cut!

Anyways, hope you enjoy! :)

- Episode 51, High Pressure 🤿

Statement of Antonia Hayley, regarding a deep dive that took place near Sable Island, Nova Scotia in August 2006.

On tonight’s episode of ✨the connections✨, we bring you back to a jolly old rich dude who throws people into the void! So um…yeah, this one definitely brought back some interesting plot points. In all honesty, I have very little to say about my thoughts on the statement outside of some theories, as while the episode was really good, it’s also a pretty simple one to understand. So, I’ll just run through a few rapid-fire thoughts on the episode, and then get into a few of the meatier topics. Firstly, it’s always nice to have a statement outside of The UK, that definitely does a good job when it comes to the world building, and shows that ✨the horrors✨ really are all around us, so I like that. This statement also gets bonus points for doing another great job at scaring me. I’m not especially thalassophobic, but the descriptions of the empty water devoid of life, and the way the darker waters creeped up into the surface levels…I don’t know, it just got to me. I also found it interesting how we never learn what company Ms. Haley worked for, and how Captain Kemp seemed to have some greater awareness of what happened here, although I can’t really speculate on what all of this means outside of that I think it’s important. And…yeah, those are my thoughts on the standalone elements of this episode! It was really good, don’t get me wrong…I just don’t have a whole lot to say about it. But thankfully, this episode does bring up a good few interesting connections, and managed to further develop the story in some really interesting ways, and I have much more to say about that. The first thing I have to talk about is, of course, The Fairchild Family.

Admittedly, if it wasn’t for Episode 46 reminding me of Episode 21, I might have just forgotten about this plot point, so it’s honestly very nice to see it getting some further development. Looking back at Episode 21, we see that Simon Fairchild was an old man who went skydiving with Robert Kelly, due to a charity raised for his deceased wife, and he was also accompanied by a relative of his named Harriet Fairchild, who was his instructor. Before he dived, he yelled “enjoy sky blue” at Robert, seemingly explaining why he fell into that endless sky, and later got “eaten” by it. Here, we learn that The Fairchilds are a wealthy family located in Cornwall, who invest in aerospace technology, shipping logistics, and underwater drilling and construction. It’s also implied that Simon Fairchild was a con artist in the 1930s who owned many pieces of jewelry, and that he was thrown out of a fourth floor window, yet no one noticed. The cases that would later contain this jewelry would start to mysteriously crack, as if something had been dropped on them. Jon states that Simon Fairchild was an alias of the con artist, meaning that if the con artist is the same person, the entire Fairchild family might be under a fake surname. And finally, Simon is most likely responsible for what happened in this episode. And…that’s about all we know on The Fairchilds for now, although I must say that I have quite a few things to say about them, particularly Simon. So, I said in my last post that I think there’s a connection between The Fairchilds and Mike Crew, as they both seem to connect to and/or directly serve something known as “Vertigo” or (more fittingly in my opinion) “The Vast”. I still stand by this, and I think Simon, and potentially other Fairchilds, can throw people into wide open voids, taking the form of endless skies and dark waters. However, here lies something interesting. Initially, I thought that The Vast only encompassed the sky, given everything that had been seen up until this point, but now I think it just encompasses all horror relating to wide open spaces that just have…a whole lot of nothing in them. Because here, we see that Simon’s abilities manifest in the ocean rather than the sky, and The Fairchilds seem to invest in all sorts of…wide space-like business ventures. I personally think that he shouted something like “Enjoy ocean blue” after Antonia, and that’s what caused her to experience the dark waters. As for where he got these powers, I don’t really know, but because Mike’s weird sky related experiences seem to be responsible for…whatever weird shit has happened to him, I have to wonder if Simon’s defenestration back in the 30s did something to him as well, maybe whoever pushed him out the window was also kind of a weirdo. But mentioning him being alive in the 30s…this guy’s age is a little weird. Like, my grandpa was born in the 30s, and while still pretty healthy, is nowhere near as mobile and adventurous as this guy who was at the very least a late teen in the 30s, presuming that the con artist is the same person as this Simon (which does make me wonder what his REAL name could be…). All I’m saying is that this guy must have some INSANE stamina going on, especially if he really is coming up on a century here. So yeah, I think the powers Simon had are pretty interesting, and that the information I think it seems to provide on “The Vast” is also pretty cool. There are a couple of other things about The Fairchilds I find interesting. Firstly, I will say that it’s strange this is now the third instance of an extensive family with paranormal ties, alongside The Keays and The Lukases. I don’t know if they’re directly linked, but it makes me think that if one person in the family has a paranormal experience…it’s effects might carry over to the rest. Like, maybe Albrecht von Closen’s encounter in The Schwartzwald still haunts The Keays to this day (even though the two we know of are at least…somewhat dead.) I just wonder where exactly the weird stuff with these families starts, and where it ends.

The Fairchilds also have this weird association with riches, which like yeah, it makes sense because they’re rich, but I find it kind of peculiar as a recurring motif. Like, Simon was skydiving for a charity that directly funded the family, he wanted to uncover the riches of his great-grandfather’s shipwreck, and he was at one point a jewelry con-artist. I don’t know if this actually means anything but I just found it kind of interesting. Finally, I kind of want to talk about the dark water. The way it was described, especially with the “hand” reaching out…it really reminded me of Lost Johns’ Cave. Like, a lot. It’s interesting, because I associate that episode with ✨the horrors✨ that connect to compression and/or darkness, the former of which is…pretty much the opposite of The Vast, so these potential similarities are kind of weird to me, but still definitely interesting. Kind of makes me wonder if the events here were like…maybe a collaborative effort between The Fairchilds and The People’s Church of The Divine Host, although that might be a bit of a stretch for the time being. So uh…yeah! There’s my thoughts on The Fairchilds I guess! I really hope to learn more about this weird-ass rich family as time goes on, as I think the whole vibe that surrounds them is great, I’m a sucker for when relatively unassuming old people turn out to be pretty cunning and fucked up in reality, so I’d love to see Simon and other Fairchilds pop up again in the future. And while I do wish I had more to say about the core plot of the statement, I must reiterate that I thought it was good. Like I said, it did a good job at scaring me, so I’d consider that a win. But honestly, as fun as all of this is…I don’t think it quite competes with the supplemental, because WOW. This one is easily my favorite so far.

Let me start by saying what I’ve been saying the entire season. Jon. You need to get your shit together. Like OH MY GOD. I KNOW that he’s technically suspicious of…”Sasha”, but even then! Why is it that he stalks Tim outside of his house, sees Martin’s crush on him as threatening, and moves Elias to the top of his suspect list simply because he said “dude, stop stalking your coworkers”, but then SASHA, the lady who stares at the table you acknowledge is creepy, goes to a wax museum for prolonged periods of time every day, and who despite the abilities of the impersonator is still CLEARLY acting differently than how she did before the funky worm lady showed up, and she *somehow* lost a few tapes, is apparently still the least suspicious? What the hell are you on? Are you stealing from Elias’ secret drawer of the good shit or something? Honestly it kind of feels like Not!Sasha isn’t even trying to hide her identity, but that’s just because she has no reason to since Jon is just THAT. FREAKING. DENSE. Ffs you are an ARCHIVIST. You work at an INSTITUTE. You are INSUFFERABLE. But like, on that note, can I just compliment Jonny Sims for making a protagonist that is such an insufferable loser…and yet I still love him dearly? Like, not just ironically, I’m genuinely invested in him and still really like his character despite how insane and stupid he can be. That takes some serious writing talent. But anyways…back to the supplemental. Firstly, Jon mentions that a few new artifacts have been admitted to the storage room, namely a wardrobe that light can not penetrate, an eye carved out of rock that interferes with video cameras, and a scalpel permanently covered in disease. I get the feeling that all of these are likely to show up in future statements, with the eye being the most curious to me personally. I feel like there’s probably a connection to Gerard Keay there, but the way it makes this video cameras malfunction is very reminiscent of how the computers can’t upload any real statements. But while that’s all pretty interesting, the real highlight to me is the recording of him and Not!Sasha.

Firstly, I just need to give some serious props to Eve Hewitt for her voice acting. You can tell that Not!Sasha has become more accustomed to her new identity over time, but it’s still just so…perfectly off, and I still love the faint audio distortion in the back of her scenes. Secondly…FUCK YEAH THE FRACTALS! I FEEL SO VALIDATED. For a while now I’ve held the belief that Micheal connects to fractals, which I still think is very likely, but I also found it interesting how the patterns on the table were described in a way very similar to the fractals, so I felt like there might be some connection. …I still don’t quite know what that connection might be but PROGRESS. Now, Not!Sasha suggests it’s more like a web that has caught them, but firstly, Not!Sasha is a lying little asshole, and secondly, I think she only says that due to her personal relationship with the table. You see, ever since the end of Season 1, I figured that the table was used to transport the impersonators, but Not!Sasha’s dialogue here makes it seem like more of a prison, one that the impersonator does not want to be tethered to. Now, I’ve always assumed that impersonators are a species, and I still do given the existence of the anatomy students (which aren’t exactly the same but they’re still just too similar to ignore), but now I think that one specific impersonator was tethered to the table, and it must go wherever the table goes. This probably means that Not!Graham and Not!Sasha are actually the exact same being, and “Graham Folger” is likely to have just…vanished. Alternatively there could be still be multiple impersonators here, who get released from the table after they successfully impersonate someone, but no matter what the truth is, I just find it so interesting, as it’s really our first true look at Not!Sasha’s thoughts that come from the real entity, not the person it’s pretending to be. But like, this just makes me think about the table itself even more. Like, whether the pattern is a web or a fractal, I think the fact that it’s imprisoning another paranormal being is very interesting. If it’s a fractal, then it connects back to Micheal, someone who recognizes Not!Sasha’s true identity, and while still undeniably a messed up being given what he did to Helen Richardson, has ultimately been pretty helpful to The Institute, outside of when he stabbed Jon of course. But if it’s a web, then a web makes me think of spiders, which not only ties back to the spiders in the box that I strongly believe to be the missing piece of the table (which also had an APPLE inside! Anatomy Class!), but also ties back to the spiders killing worms in the tunnels, showing at least some level of disdain for other aspects of ✨the horrors✨. I personally lean towards the pattern being a fractal, but either option is very interesting, and I’m really starting to wonder what this table even is. Lastly, we have the interesting reveal of Not!Sasha spending time at…Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum…of all places. Ok….I mean you do not actually you I guess. I’m sure there will be some genuine relevance to the plot from this information at some point, but for now, I think I can only extrapolate small things from it. Personally, I think that..at least one of the reasons she’s going here is in order to study how to become human, which is once again very reminiscent of Anatomy Class. Which like…I get the motivation, but if you want to learn how to become more human, go take an anthropology class or something. Madame Tussaud’s is definitely good in terms of wax museums but like…wax figures are still inherently uncanny and not all that natural so…you should really find better ways of educating yourself Not!Sasha. (Honestly though, as much as I drag her for killing my beloved OG Sasha, I have developed quite a fondness for Not!Sasha. Like, she’s still very unnerving, but it’s just kind of funny to have her be that new weird coworker in the office. Like, she is living someone else’s best life.) …I got off topic. Anyways, all in all a good episode with a really interesting supplemental.

Supplemental: Micheal…come back…I miss yoooouuuuuuu…

- Episode 52, Exceptional Risk 🚰

Statement of Phillip Brown, regarding a time working at HMP Wakefield between 1990 and 2002.

Yes. YES. YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES FUCK YEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS. I’M SO GENUINELY HAPPY THAT THIS IS AN EPISODE THAT EXISTS! I haven’t really mentioned this before, since my thoughts on the first 20 episodes were extremely brief (looking back at that post now is an experience btw), but I absolutely ADORE A Father’s Love. It’s such a tragic and interesting episode that I have not stopped thinking about ever since I first listened to it, not my all time favorite, but it is up there. So the fact it basically got a sequel makes me extremely happy, and while I don’t like this episode quite as much as A Father’s Love, I still think it’s really, REALLT good in its own right. Truth be told, this episode doesn’t reveal a ton of new information in summary, as we already knew that Robert Montauk died in prison, and it was likely due to The People’s Church of The Divine Host, but just being able to get a more vivid look at what happened really does add a lot in my opinion. So uh…yeah, let’s start this off by talking about the episode’s protagonist, Philip Brown. And let me just say, this guy is absolutely the gold medalist for most dickheaded statement giver in the entire series so far. Congratulations, I guess. Once again, I actually like when we get morally questionable statement givers, but maaaaannn. I just wanted to see this man suffer. Not only because I had sympathy for Robert given my prior knowledge of his past, but also because they REALLY portrayed the cruelty of many prison guards extremely well. Honestly kind of a shame that he didn’t suffer more. And you know, while his experience was certainly paranormal, I got the vibe that he was only submitting a statement out of pettiness rather than genuine fear, but that’s just another example of great storytelling. Overall glad his wife left him, but he was certainly an interesting protagonist. Anyways, I also wanted to talk more about Robert because..uuuuuaaaagghhh…his story makes me so sad :(. I actually really liked the way they portrayed him here, because it’s so real. Philip talks about his hulking size, how he broke the arm of another prisoner and was put in the exceptional risk unit due to his insane danger, as you’d expect from a prison guard who only knows him as one of the country’s most notorious and threatening serial killers. But when you look back at A Father’s Love, and how his daughter Julia talked about him…she just described him as her dad, because that’s who she knew him as. She obviously understood that he was a serial killer who did terrible things, but she still focused on the more tragic aspects of his story, and it provides such a nice contrast to that episode and this one, really showing how complicated everyone’s world views are. It’s just another great example of how good the storytelling here really is. But back to Robert…wow, it really is just so unfortunate what happened. To have this man do everything to attempt to save the lives of both his daughter and himself (presumably after his wife abandoned him, which admittedly I do wish was touched upon a bit more here), only to find that it was all for naught is just absolutely gut-wrenching. We already knew The People’s Church of The Divine Host were involved in his death but…just hearing about it from someone who (kind of, because it was dark) witnessed it directly makes it all the more depressing. Really, the only small bit of relief I got here was the part about him and Julia reuniting, but even then that was still really sad given how he felt he had to lie. But now I think I ought to discuss the most interesting elements of this episode. Truth be told, while this episode is very overtly connected to others in obvious ways, it didn’t reveal all that much new stuff. But, that being said, I still think there was a couple of interesting things here, those being Maxwell Rayner’s first true appearance, and the return of the darkness.

Truth be told, at this point in time there’s like…no information on Maxwell Rayner. All we know is that he was a defrocked Pentecostal minister, who according to Julia Montauk, might possibly be German. This would line up pretty well, as he is presumably a descendant of the World War 1 solider Joseph Rayner, whose body was found next to Wilfred Owen’s in Episode 7. Obviously he was the “detective” on the phone in Episode 9, and he founded The People’s Church of The Divine Host. Also, I completely forgot about this, but Rayner apparently disappeared in 1994, and the church disbanded around the same time. This is really strange though, because all of the episodes that definitely focus on the church have taken place after 1994, so I think it’s safe to assume that the disbandment was just a cover-up of sorts. Anyways, with all that in mind, what does this episode tell us about him? Well, not much really. All we know now is that he definitely still held resentment for Robert, and that he seemingly orchestrated his death, and really…everything weird in Episode 9 firsthand. However, I still think his presence here is important, simply due to his one line of dialogue. That being “You didn’t think you could kill it for long, did you?” This is…honestly pretty interesting. I assume that the “it” Rayner refers to is meant to be the darkness that The People’s Church of The Divine Host serves, all because of the context. You see, I initially assumed Robert was sacrificing people to appease the darkness; the more people he killed, the less the darkness would come for him and Julia. But based on this line of dialogue, I now think that he was trying to actively fight back against the darkness. I think this adds up quite nicely, because looking back, at least one of the people Robert Montauk killed was a member of the church, so it doesn’t seem too far fetched to assume that EVERYONE he killed was a part of the church as well. I think he was killing them, not to appease the darkness, but to drive it away. And that’s why Rayner looked at him with such hatred, why the darkness killed him so brutally. Robert Montauk wasn’t just a failure to the church, he was a traitor. But…mentioning his death, I actually want to discuss the darkness itself, as this episode gave a very new and interesting look into how it works. Now, the gross water and malfunctioning lights is all stuff we’ve seen before, as is the mention of things that are just kind of…wet and gross, but this episode provides a new aspect of the darkness, that being something really…animalistic. Like, we have tearing coming from the cell, Robert being dead from an excessive amount of stab wounds of all things, and then most notably, the darkness growling. I don’t know what exactly to make of this yet, but I just find it really interesting. I initially viewed the darkness as some sort of weird, mysterious force, but now I’m starting to see it more like a traditional monster, and…I don’t know, it’s causing gears to turn in my head. In conclusion, while this statement didn’t offer as much new things as some others…I’m - I’m just way to invested in this family drama to even care, and I’m so happy it wasn’t just a one-off thing. So…yeah. Great episode.

But of course, there’s the supplemental….s to discuss. Yeah, there was kind of two supplementals in this episode, I mean not really, but I don’t know where else to put the interaction with Basira so…uh…here you go! Now, the actual supplemental doesn’t grant much new information. I think it’s safe to assume that Not!Sasha is lying about her boyfriend, but it’s at the very least nice to see Jon genuinely just…not trusting her right now. (Also the phrase “produce said boyfriend” now lives rent free in my head.) But thankfully, even though the supplemental is short, we have a mid-statement interaction with Basira! Super happy to see that she’s a recurring character, and that she’s brought a new tape with her! I’m interested by the prospect about a statement on The Library of Alexandria of all things, that’s always been a very interesting historical conundrum to me so I’d love to see how tma tackles it. But as nice of a reveal as that is, it pales, nay, it SQUEALS in comparison to the reveal that TIM. IS CANONICALLY. THE HOT ONE. FUCK. YES. I mean, it was already pretty obvious, the man has managed to seduce at least two cops of different genders, but I’m so happy that we know he’s just like…objectively hot. Whatever you’re most attracted to, that’s what Tim looks like. (Unless you’re not attracted to men, or anyone, but you get the point. Also the fact that Basira says he pulls off the worm scars while Jon doesn’t like C’MON YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO HIM LIKE THAT.) I also need to appreciate the fact that the first assistant Jon thinks of is Martin. …We’ve come so far from the days of Episode 1 where he straight up didn’t consider him one…and this is the first tangible sign of Jon maybe reciprocating his feelings so I’m very happy about this. And of course, how can I neglect to mention that Jon and Basira are just going to keep Tim’s assumptions afloat to avoid suspicion. Like, considering that this is one of the most horrific pieces of media I’ve every engaged with, I must say it’s kind of insane how funny it can be at times. (Also, they might have been implying “I’m not interested” in their interaction, but I’m just going to assume that Jon and Basira were saying “I’m not straight” because shut up I can dream.) So yeah…you guys weren’t entirely kidding when you said The Magnus Archives is a workplace comedy.

Supplemental: I’m thinking about the tunnels…we haven’t heard about them for a while. Also, is Jon just not going to tell anyone about Micheal? Like, I know you value discretion, but that seems kind of important, no? I mean, he did kidnap a woman twice and then stab you so….uh….what’s going on man?

- Episode 53, Crusader 📜

Sergeant Walter Heller recording, regarding a discovery made near Alexandria during Operation Crusader in November of 1941.

Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god. Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes YES! THE BRAINWORMS ARE GOING WILD!!! Look, I already expected this episode to give some very interesting information just because of the fact it’s another Gertrude tape, but WOW. This one did a LOT. It seems fairly isolated from others on the surface, but there’s so many little connections to other episodes that make my brain go absolutely wild. There’s…quite a bit to unpack here, but I’ll do my best to cover everything that shows up in this episode, and also my theories about what it might all mean. So, I’ll start by discussing….let’s say, the core plot of the statement.

So, not only is this another recording done by Gertrude, but it doubles as a statement recorded live from subject. And I’ve got to say, Walter Heller was a great protagonist, particularly due to his VA. I will admit that I initially found him hard to hear, but that’s ultimately kind of a me problem, and it doesn’t matter because by the time I finished the episode, I thought that Harvey Kesselman did a FANTASTIC job as him. The voice acting in tma has always been of fantastic quality, but this one might just be the most real and visceral yet. He really portrayed the role of a war veteran with implied PTSD fantastic, and made it so easy to sympathize with a character in just one episode, which given Walter’s fate, is unfortunately probably the only episode he’ll ever be in. But honestly, his story was just really sad, even if the WW2 aspect of the statement isn’t the main focus, the description of that battle in the desert, him getting shot in the leg and watching his comrade die in a fiery blaze…it’s just really heartbreaking and shockingly real. I honestly kind of like how the first part of the episode wasn’t really paranormal, just a sad look at the horrors of war. It reminded me of Episode 7 in a way, although I don’t really get the feeling they’re connected. (Also between this and Episode 48 I really have to wonder what Italy did to Rusty Quill.) But of course, after the battle, we move on to the plot about The Serapeum of Alexandria. As I mentioned earlier, this is a part of history that I really like, and I think it fits perfectly in tma. But…regarding this plot line, this is where I have to get a little bit speculative. Because truth be told, there’s so many odd similarities to previous statements here, and so many weird new reveals as well that really do befuddle me. So uh..let’s get into that!

So this whole part starts with Walter falling through a wooden door. Already it’s evoking feelings of a previous episode, said episode obviously being The New Door. And not only do the tunnels that Walter ends up in kind of remind me of Micheal’s backrooms, but also give of feelings of many other previous episodes. These episodes include Lost Johns’ Cave, Old Passages, Too Deep and Schwartzwald, the last of which I feel is…particularly relevant for reasons I’ll get into soon. But as Walter goes through the tunnels, he find himself in multiple rooms, filled with scrolls. And as we learn later…these scrolls are here because The Serapeum, or at least what lies beneath it, were a previous iteration of the archives. Specifically the ones in The Magnus Institute. ….WHAT THE FUCK?! WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?! This just raises…so many questions. I mean, the tunnels kind of reminded me of the old library in Schwartzwald, but THE Magnus Archives?! What?! This just raises…so many questions. Like, what was on the scrolls? Were they also statements regarding the paranormal, or something greater. How does Jonah Magnus tie into all of this. Why and how did he replicate these ancient hidden caves when making his institute. If the archives have existed this long, is Jonah even the real founder of The Magnus Institute, or has it just existed for a long time, going under different names? And what exactly makes this specific breed of archive so special? Just…why…how…what…when…where…who…HUH?! I know that my thoughts on this are super incoherent and scrambled but like…I CAN’T HELP IT! THIS IS JUST WAY TOO MUCH! But…regarding what might make this archive and that of The Magnus Institute so special…well, I think it’s safe to say that they are both connected to the same member of ✨the horrors✨. That being the one associated with eyes. …oh dear.

So, as Walter goes through the tunnels, he finds a corpse of a knight, which Gertrude later suspects to be of The Order of St. John, which I will touch in in a bit. All I have to say for now is that this guy was…probably killed by the thing inside here. That thing is likely the long robed figure with spindly fingers and one eye. I will say that the fingers, alongside the door and the passages in general are all very Micheal-core, but I don’t know how connected all of this actually is to him just yet so…I’ll make a small note of that for the time being and just leave it as an odd similarity for now. Anyways, this figure, Micheal-related or not, gives Walter the ability to see perfectly in the dark, but also makes him feel as if he’s being watched. So overall there’s a lot of eye and sight imagery here, which is already an interesting connection to Schwartzwald and The Keay Family, but things get really, REALLY interesting when Walter comes back to this encounter post-statement. Because apparently, he experienced the exact same feeling of being watched when he came to the institute. So, combine that with the fact that the archives in Alexandria are supposedly a previous iteration of those in the institute, and something becomes very clear. Every iteration of of the archives has been fucking haunted. Not just by worms, spiders, Micheal, Not!Sasha and etc, but by one of ✨the horrors✨ in the flesh. (I know three of the things I listed I consider horrors but shut up I’m trying to be dramatic.) And I think that horror is the one associated with eyes. The very same one that is connected to The Keay Family. I already mentioned how this episode reminded me of Schwartzwald with the ancient library thing going on, and the eyes, but think about what Walter said. How he felt like he was being watched back then and felt the same thing when giving his statement. I think that Jonah Magnus might have sought to replicate the archive beneath The Serapeum, and in doing so, made it the new home of the being that once resided there. Maybe that’s the thing that’s inside the tunnels, the thing that Jon feels like is watching him. And when you think about how this thing might connect to The Keay Family, how Gerard can wield its power, not only does it make me think about how The Keays could potentially connect to The Institute (outside of the obvious yet very interesting fact of Jonah being close to Albrecht von Closen), but it also gets me thinking about Pinhole Books, Mary Keay’s bookstore. While not technically an archive, it…still could’ve been something pretty close, right. Maybe she sought to create a home for the eye horror as well. Maybe Jurgen Leitner had a similar goal with his library! (Although granted, a lot of Leitners seem to connect to other horrors so I’m not entirely sure about that one.) It’s just…it’s just a lot to take in. Obviously the institute has had to deal with things like The Flesh Hive and Micheal, but…to think that it might have been home to a horror this entire time is concerning. It gets me thinking about so much. From Jonah Magnus, to the tunnels, to Elias, to just…whatever true purpose this place might hold! There’s so many other things as well though, like how the eye horror has a clear theme of knowledge since it hangs around in ancient archives and libraries, and yet Gerard, who clearly has a connection to it, is going out of his way to BURN. BOOKS. What’s up with that? And like, what if the eye horror ends up being specific to just the archives? Does that mean that other places in the institute like Artifact Storage are more tied to another one of ✨the horrors✨? I just…UUUUUGGGHHH this is so much to take in oh my god. And you want to know what the funny thing is? We’re STILL. NOT. DONE. Because both Gertrude and Jon have follow-ups to give us, and….oh boy.

So, let’s start with Gertrude. I think one of the most peculiar things about her follow-up is that it’s very different from the one she did in Tightrope. There, she was entirely certain of what she was dealing with, seemingly having extensive prior knowledge on The Other Circus. Here though, I mean…she’s still a hell of a lot more sure of things than Jon, but it seems like this was part of an ongoing investigation she was doing, rather than being just another statement for her. Either way, she was clearly taking proactive measures to investigate this case and deal with what it implied…but maybe she was just a little bit TOO proactive. …I’ll get to that in a bit. The second thing of note here is that we learn the entire statement was done off the record, meaning that, on a sentiment shared by Jon, Gertrude did not trust the institute. And honestly, who can really blame her? I’ve already explained why I think the archives are home to some eldritch eye monster, and I get the feeling she knew that as well. Still though, considering she had a lack of faith in the institute for at least 17 years given the time between this recording and her death, I really have to wonder what she did with this mistrust? On top of that, it might add even more to the idea Elias killed her. After all, it would be in character for the head of the institute to do so if she threatened its foundation…although if he did kill her, I still think there might have been a bit more reason to do so. Anyways, it’s just really interesting to know she figured out something was wrong with this place, and I am…very concerned by what that something might be. Anyways, after bringing up some real world history, Gertrude says something…very interesting. And I’m not talking about the accounts that describe people being tortured or sacrificed in worship of pagan deities, even though that’s interesting for admittedly obvious reasons. I’m talking about the part where she says that an unnamed historian claimed that the ones who destroyed The Serapeum were not Christians…but a group known as “Those Who Sing The Night.” And if that doesn’t evoke The People’s Church of The Divine Host, I don’t know what does. Obviously night makes sense as a motif, as does singing, since Natalie did a lot of creepy singing in Episode 25. But on top of that, Walter’s torch went out for mysterious reasons while he was in the caverns, and you know how the church’s symbol is a closed eye? Well, that seems to signify a potential rivalry between the darkness and the eye horrors, which would explain why “Those Who Sing The Night” would destroy The Serapeum, and why Walter was able to see in the supposedly paranormal darkness. The eyes were combating the power of the darkness, since they are the only things that can “see in the dark.” Still though, their potential presence here is interesting for another reason. Maxwell Rayner is old, but not THAT old, so there’s a very real possibility that the church has been reforged time and time again. Rayner isn’t the true founder, just the founder of the church’s modern iteration. Hell, maybe he isn’t actually in charge anymore, since the church supposedly disbanded in 1994, although I still think there’s a possibility that was a cover-up. Gertrude also makes a strange sound after mentioning this group, which signifies familiarity to me. I feel this makes sense, due to the screams coming from Hither Green Chapel on the day she died. Finally, Gertrude suggests that The Order of St. John might have been hunting down ✨the horrors✨, and that maybe the robed figure was a previous archivist. ….If it really is Micheal I’m going to cut out my tongue.

And finally, we have Jon’s supplemental. I’m just going to start out by saying that OH MY GOD MARTIN IS THE SWEETEST MAN ALIVE. He’s so genuinely attentive and caring to Jon it’s just so…UGH! I think everyone just needs someone like him around he’s way too nice. And as always, Jon SERIOUSLY needs to get his shit together. Not only should he take better care of himself, but…come on man, do you seriously think people will believe you stabbed yourself with the bread knife when there are ELDRITCH HORRORS around? (Although I have seen people suggest Martin thought he was self harming, and if that is the case then consider my heart broken.) But anyways, Jon’s existential crisis continues. Look, I’m concerned about Gertrude’s fate as well, I’m concerned about how the archivists might date back to at least…let’s see…One Thousand, Six Hundred and Thirty-Two years ago?! Damn. But…you seriously need a nap Jon. But outside of Jon’s ordeal…we have one last reveal (hey that kind of rhymed). So…apparently, six months after the recording of the statement, an explosion happened near the caves in Alexandria that destroyed several buildings and killed seventeen people. And from the looks of things…that explosion happened because of Gertrude Robinson. …wait what. what. I-I’m sorry. WHAT?! Damn, I guess she really WAS proactive. Look, I’ll be honest and say that I already got the feeling Gertrude wasn’t my just a sweet old grandma. Firstly, her name is the most mean old lady name I’ve ever heard, and secondly, she’s appeared in multiple statements, seemingly having pissed off at least two different cults. But like…did she really have to go that far?! I know that there’s some horrific shit going on in there, but like, a guy find the remains of THE LIBRARY OF FREAKING ALEXANDRIA, and she just BLOWS IT UP? Like, as time goes on, it’s become much more clear that Gertrude wasn’t a bad archivist, she clearly took her job…maybe a bit TOO seriously, and I definitely think her poor organization of statements was done on purpose, either to get her successor to read the ones that were important, or to fuck with the institute she so clearly mistrusted. But…can I really call her a good academic when she decided to destroy knowledge THAT valuable. Shame on you, you beautiful anarchist of a senior citizen. Also, I cannot get over the fact that she was SO eager to get rid of something that, for all we know, might also have a home in the institute, that she travelled all the way from London to Alexandria, and KILLED 17 PEOPLE. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. I…desperately need to know more about her, if I don’t know everything she’s capable of I will start fearing for my safety. Jon WISHES he could be her. And you know what, if Elias did kill her…I can totally see why! He might have not just been protecting himself, the institute and those close to him, he could’ve very well been protecting THE ENTIRE WORLD. Hell, it doesn’t matter who killed her (ok I mean it still does but like you get what I mean), because that sentiment remains true for EVERYONE. Is…is she the true threat of the series? Should I somehow be more concerned. …I don’t even know at this point. Anyways…great episode, loved the protagonist, the implications are amazing, Martin is the purest man to ever grace god’s green abominable earth…but I really need to take a second and contemplate. I’m afraid there might be a Gertrude under my bed…

- Episode 54, Still Life 🐅

Statement of Alexander Scaplehorn, regarding his evaluation of The Trophy Room taxidermists in Barnet.

ANGLERFIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISH!!!! THE PLOT THICKENS YET AGAIN! So, after having to recoil from last episode, you know, what with the eye horrors and the old archives and Gertrude killing people, etc etc, it was nice to have a shorter episode here. That being said, WOW did this one give me some things to think about. Just…the amount of connections that are showing up…this podcast, especially this season, has never ceased to surprise me with what it’s capable of. The protagonist, atmosphere and pacing already made this a great episode on its own, and the callbacks to the earliest season 1 episodes made it even better. So, let’s just get into it! (Oh and, this isn’t really relevant but I might as well put it here. …TAX collector. TAXidermy. Ha ha ha. Ha ha. Ha ha. Ha. Comedy.)

So, I’ll start off with some of the basic things. Firstly, I have to mention that I really, REALLY enjoyed Alexander Scaplehorn as a protagonist. Like, we STAN a king who simply does his job and otherwise minds his own business. Literally went through the horrors and then just went back to living as normal, what a champion. Honestly, this is probably the most sympathetic portrayal of a tax collector I’ve ever witnessed in a piece of media, and I’m surprisingly not upset about that. Also, some other people have pointed this out, but I think it needs to be said just in case. This man is excited to infodump on some guy he just met about taxes, is fine doing so as long as he’s attentive, immediately notices how uncomfortable the atmosphere is, struggles making conversation, is simply trying to get through his day without trouble…and then goes on to say he has a cousin with autism. I think someone needs to tell him something about himself…and that’s all I’m going to say. (Also jsyk this is coming from an autistic person who experiences all of this, so I’m not trying to make stereotypical assumptions or anything.) …Anyways, outside of the second most legendary protagonist after Joshua Gillespie, I’ve gotta say that I really liked the whole atmosphere of this episode. Taxidermy, while admittedly kind of freaky, is something that I’ve always been a little bit drawn to ever since I learned about it just due to the vibes alone (unless it’s of a cat, if it’s of a cat I cry), so I really liked the whole vibe of an old taxidermy shop. And like…I get why some might be freaked out by it, but I’d be lying if I said the idea of someone owning some of the world’s oldest skin didn’t kind of entice me, that’s just a pretty cool thing to own. One other small note I have, although it’s not from the statement, was Jon’s line here. “I may not entirely trust my assistants, but…I won’t lose them.” …. :(. Anyways…moving on to ✨the connections✨…(who’s going to tell him…)

Ok, so, the first obvious connection to a previous episode comes from when Alexander first enters The Trophy Room. (which by the way, is apparently the name of a real world taxidermy shop, but only in the US.) Here, Alex sees a stuffed tiger in the window with glassy eyes. As soon as I heard this, I immediately thought back to Tightrope, where this same tiger made an appearance. Not only does this connect the episode’s plot to The Other Circus, which I’ll get more into later, but from both episodes, we can tell that this tiger isn’t exactly….real (although the skin might still be), but it’s definitely capable of “coming to life.” Definitely seems like this applies to the other taxidermies as well, and based on Tightrope, as well as other parts of this episode, I really do think that The Other Circus is Daniel’s supplier for the taxidermy, or at least part of the circus. And speaking of which, we have Daniel Rawlings. Now, much like Sarah Baldwin from Skintight, Daniel Rawlings was mentioned in Episode 1 as one of the people taken by The Anglerfish, and he too seems to now be an avid smoker with a connection to the monster. Along with this, both of them have a very apparent connection to skin which is…interesting. And obviously, The Anglerfish itself is here as well, hooray!(?) Not too much to say about its appearance here, other than that Alex was probably smart to have not went down to the basement in the end, and that I found it interesting how it was repeating a different phrase than what it did in the first episode. I think it’s fair to assume that The Anglerfish changes the phrase it uses to lure people depending on its location. It asks for a cigarette while in the alleyway, and acts as a shop clerk while in The Trophy Room. I think that’s why Alex says it was almost mechanical in its speech, because the things it says are like auto-generated phrases made for specific circumstances. And the final overt connection to previous episodes was the return of everyone’s favorite delivery…somethings, Breekon and Hope. I’m honestly kind of surprised by how frequently they show up, but I’m not complaining. I was also reminded by the last episode with how all of the taxidermies looked at Alex, but I’m not sure if that genuinely means anything or not, especially since the eyes were all glassy, signifying a lack of pupils to properly look at someone with. So, that’s a basic assortment of recurring characters and concepts, but with all of that in mind, how does everything connect?

Let’s start off with Breekon and Hope, as well as The Other Circus. These two already have a very apparent connection, as Breekon and Hope were seen as members of the circus in Tightrope. Now, when I gave my thoughts on that episode, I suggested that these two left The Other Circus and started their own business, and while I still think that’s the case, I think that they might have less of an antagonistic relationship than I initially thought. Granted, it’s possible they stole The Other Circus’ taxidermies, and they’re giving them to Daniel in order to keep them hidden, but I kind of think that, while now separate, their delivery company is still on good terms with The Circus, or maybe a straight up offshoot of The Circus, and that’s because of…motivations. You see, the more I think about it, I realize that Sarah and Daniel seem to spread fear in a very similar way to that of the circus. You see, Sarah and Daniel never hurt the protagonists of the story, they just…unnerved them. Sarah pulled her skin off in front of Melanie King, and Daniel made the taxidermy move in front of Alex, but they never really tried to kill them. Daniel…might have been trying to, but given how neither he nor Breekon and Hope bothered to give chase, I don’t really think he was that dead-set on murder. And then take a look at The Other Circus. Now yes, Leanne Denikin’s ex-boyfriend died because of the calliope, but granted, no actual member of the circus played it themselves in that scenario, and when Nikolai Denikin, an actual member, did, no one was seen dead. And yes, Yuri Utkin’s brother Ivan did die at one point, but there’s no real evidence that his death was caused by The Other Circus. When we look at what the circus actually did…they just scared people, nothing more. So you have these two groups with very similar methods of scaring people, and…I don’t know, it makes me think that The Other Circus and servants of The Anglerfish might be chill with each other, and that might in turn mean that Breekon and Hope maintain some form of a positive relationship with the circus, even if they aren’t direct members anymore. But…that all gets me thinking even more. You see, on my list of ✨the horrors✨ I cited two of them as “The Anglerfish” and “Whatever The Other Circus serves”. But now I’m wondering…what if The Other Circus serves The Anglerfish? They have this apparent connection now so…maybe. I still need quite a bit more time to wrap my head around this idea, but like think about it for a second. The Anglerfish HAS servants, and The Other Circus acts in a similar way to how they do, functioning with things like fake audiences, dolls and taxidermies…it just feels like it connects in some sort of way. But then again, as time goes on, it kind of feels like The Anglerfish is struggling to live up to levels of eldritch that the other members of ✨the horrrors✨ are, so what if it isn’t a horror at all, and something a bit lesser? WHAT IF- Ok. Ok I’m getting a little bit incoherent with my thought process now. Look, the cut and dry is that I definitely think The Other Circus, Breekon and Hope, and The Anglerfish and it’s servants have some sort of connection, due to them all playing into this episode, and the fact that they all have similar themes, and that they’ll all end up coming together at some point or another. This statement is really good and a lot of fun on its own, but…it certainly has given me a lot to think about, even if it’s not in the most coherent way. But of course, I can’t just stop here. Because we have a follow-up and a supplemental to get through and…well, it’s…certainly pretty interesting…

So, I already mentioned that…absolutely gut-wrenching line from Jon, but that’s obviously not everything there is to talk about here. Firstly, Jon mentions that The Trophy Room is still in operation. There isn’t all that much to say about this, other than that it’s…concerning to know that whatever weird operation this trifecta of factions seems to be a part of is still continuing. But that aside, what really gets me here is the involvement of our beloved little freak, Not!Sasha. Now, I think it’s safe to say that she’s obviously lying about how there wasn’t anything all that strange there (which Jon should REALLY catch onto soon), but as unnerving as that is, it’s also pretty in character and expected of her. What’s a bit more intriguing here though is how…eager she was to investigate. The most simple reason I can think of as to why she wanted to go check the place out was that she clearly likes wax museums, and…taxidermy stores certainly have a similar vibe. But I think there’s a bit more of a reason as to why she went to The Trophy Room…and that lies in what Jon tells us about Daniel Rawlings. You see, outside of the identical hair, the Daniel who owns The Trophy Room looks nothing like the one who went missing in 2006. Couple that with the fact that Daniel is strongly implied to be a taxidermy himself, so you know, not a real person, and I start to get thinking. What if The Anglerfish skins it’s victims, and puts them on top of non-human beings that then start pretending to be those people? What if the real Daniel Rawlings, and the real Sarah Baldwin are dead? What if “Sarah” peeling off her skin was a way of showing Melanie King her true form? What if they are somehow aligned with the anatomy students? What if these non-humans are extremely similar to the impersonator, but need a higher being to give them identies, rather than just taking one themselves? What if Not!Sasha is a direct servant of The Anglerfish, who seeks to bring harm to the institute? …I know I’m making some big claims here, but…I just feel like I might have uncovered a big mystery. I’ve thrown out the possibility of The Anglerfish maybe not being one of ✨the horrors✨, but in all honesty…I still think it is. I’m starting to wonder if maybe just maybe, all of these characters, Sarah Baldwin, Daniel Rawlings, Breekon and Hope, Not!Graham/Not!Sasha, the anatomy students, The Other Circus, and maybe even more, are all servants of The Anglerfish. All of them faceless monsters who are given new identities by their god, and seek to do its bidding by unnerving as many people as possible? At this point, I’ve basically just devolved into crack fan fiction, but I have to be honest when I say that, while I’m certain I’m far off from the truth in some aspects…I feel like I might be on to something here. In short, I think that Episode 1 is much more important than I initially thought, and that a lot, and I mean A LOT of things are going to connect back to the very first spook. …As scared as I am by Episode 53 introducing the prospect of one of ✨the horrors✨having been in the archives this entire time…I’ve gotta say…Not!Sasha is giving it some close competition. But with all of that out of the way…um, what about the supplemental?

“Supplemental: I broke into Gertrude’s flat.” OH MY GOD. That has…no right being as funny as it is. I would say “I’m afraid Jon’s hit rock bottom”, but there’s still 26 episodes left of the season, and 146 left of the entire series, so I get the feeling that his downward mental spiral is only just beginning! Yay…I-I think? Well, outside of Jon’s 16th felony of the month, what did he actually find in here. Well, not much, as from the looks of things Gertrude was a minimalist, but there were a few things worth noting. Firstly, we now know that she owned a laptop charger, meaning she…well, she obviously was in possession of a laptop at one point of another. This is intriguing if only for the fact that I feel like the series might be heading in a direction where Jon’s going to have to break into her laptop, kind of like that one part of Gravity Falls if…anyone who’s reading that has watched it. (And if you haven’t, go do that it’s really good.) Secondly, Gertrude threw away books after reading them. Since most of her books were apparently on history, I wonder if she was secretly studying ways to get rid of ✨the horrors✨, and decided to get rid of the books in an attempt to cover her tracks. And finally…the few books she did own had eyes cut out of the faces on the covers. Given what might be lurking in the archives I can’t entirely blame her…but it does make me wonder if much like Jon…she was suffering from her own paranoia. Hm. Well, that about wraps it up. Overall this episode was thoroughly enjoyable but…man, my brain has been absolutely frazzled. I’ll probably take a break tomorrow just to process everything, as there’s so many other rabbit holes I could go down if I wanted to but…I just don’t have the energy. Gertrude, the eyes, The Keay Family, Micheal, Not!Sasha, The Anglerfish, The Other Circus, Breekon and Hope, Jon, Elias….it’s all running through my head, and I need a break.

Supplemental: Ok, there are a couple of other things I should mention briefly. Firstly, I cited Breekon and Hope as servants of The Anglerfish who unnerve people…even though they don’t do it nearly as much as others. There is an explanation for this though, that being that while I think they’re still on good terms with The Other Circus, they’re still somewhat disconnected nowadays, and if the circus does honor The Anglerfish, they might not be AS devout to it as others. Even so, they DID deliver the table to the institute, so I think they still serve it in one way or another. Another thing I wanted to mention was Martin, specifically that note about him lying. I haven’t brought much attention to it since the initial reveal, but someone in the YouTube comments mentioned that Martin has a fondness for spiders…and spiders do seem to be a prominent member of ✨the horrors✨. However, that fondness for them could still be nothing, and even if it is something, it’s worth noting that the spiders are currently one of the more mysterious aspects of the story so…I’m not too sure just yet, but I thought it was interesting. Anyways, onwards to Episode 55!

- Episode 55, Pest Control 🐜

Statement of Jordan Kennedy, regarding several encounters while working in Pest Control. Statement taken direct from subject.

AND IIIIIIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOOOOOOOUUUUUUU!!!! So…it’s confirmed. Jane Prentiss is officially, indisputably dead. Her ashes are indeed with Jon…:(. Well, suffice to say, it was very nice to get an episode that kind of felt like a memorial for her, just a nice little sendoff. But despite me mourning her forever and always, WOW this episode made me giddy. It had another statement live from subject, which is always a pleasure, presented a great look at Jon’s mental state and trauma from the infestation, and also set up some extremely interesting and EXTREMELY exciting plot points for the future. Man…this season just keeps on dropping amazing episode after amazing episode. Much like Section 31, this one had a structure where is was sort of…multiple statements in one, so I think I’ll go one after another. So, that means I’m starting off with the ants! …gross.

So, before I get into the statement, I should start with the few things that come before. As mentioned earlier, the statement comes live from one Jordan Kennedy, an exterminator who helped burn Jane’s body. Now I admittedly don’t have all that much to say about Jordan as a character (and NO, it’s not just because he killed the best character), there’s just not a ton to say about him that isn’t obviously seen in the episode. However, apparently Jonny was in a band at some point, and both Jordan and Basira are voiced by other members. I just think that’s really cool, and I might have to listen to that band at some point… Anyways, the other think that stuck out to me was Jon’s mental state because…wow and yikes. Yikes as in…I don’t think he’s doing that well, but wow in the sense that I’m very happy with how they portrayed his trauma here. It’s just nice to know that despite things like Gertrude and Micheal, the podcast is still very aware that the infestation hurt him badly. I mean, it hurts to see…but it is very good writing. Well, with all of that out of the way, what do we learn from Jordan’s first statement? Well firstly, it’s nice to know that tma is still persistent in its efforts to prove that I find large amounts of insects disgusting, even when in my heart I wish I didn’t. Just….ugh, the image of all of those ants in the house makes me squirm. I will also say that the whole scenario here really did remind me of Blood Bag, so while I initially found connections between that episode and The Flesh Hive ones pretty speculative, I’m a LOT a more sure of it now. …I feel like the institute could’ve made use of that syringe in retrospect. I mean Salesa DOES give artifacts to them so…like, what the hell dude? You couldn’t have spared ONE syringe? So yeah, the ants are absolutely terrifying, I don’t like the fact that they didn’t immediately die, and…oh god, what the hell was in that fridge? (Well, you know, outside of ants.) Anyways, this could’ve just been written off as another gross as shit statement…until we’re met with the return of John Amherst, the creepy guy from Taken Ill. (Side Note: I already thought he was involved due to the description of his suit and the yellow oily residue, so getting those suspicions validated post-statement was VERY satisfying.) Anyways, Amherst’s presence here is…strange. Jon had already made comparisons between Jane’s statement and that of Nicole Baxter in MAG 36, but that was more of a reference to how the statement givers both talked about fear in similar ways. Outside of the general theme of…gross, as well as a fly landing in Amherst’s face, any other connections were interesting, yet tenuous. But now…yeah, there’s a very clear connection! Obviously both of them gave off a very similar smell, but they also care deeply for the insects that reside with them, Amherst with his ants, and Jane with her…well, they call them worms, but in retrospect I actual think they’re supposed to be Wasp Larvae, especially with the new information in this episode. I’ll still call them worms though. The major difference here though is that Jane was basically a walking corpse being piloted by her worms, while Amherst is a lot more human and in control of himself, although he is still clearly unstable given how quickly he was willing to kill Jordan…and also the fact that he seems to be making an effort to make his (former) home as disgusting as possible. Jane was also very destructive all of the time, while Amherst is clearly capable of holding back when he needs to, such as in MAG 36. So while I think these two are definitely connected, and both have probably forged connections with The Flesh Hive, said connections clearly work differently, and I’m interested to see where they go with this in the future! It’s very cool to see them delve more into the concept of regular humans who just happened to be marked by one or more of ✨the horrors✨, and as someone who loves Jane dearly, I’m very excited by the prospect of more like her, even if Amherst doesn’t quite live up to her yet, in my opinion.

There is…one other thing here in this story about Amherst that is pretty interesting though. The last major similarity between him and Jane is that they are both very weak to fire. Granted we already knew this, since C02 was used against Jane, and Trevor the Tramp and his companion seemingly set fire to Ivy Meadows, but this similarity becomes a lot more interesting when we look at the second story Jordan tells us. Oh uh…yeah, my thoughts on this story individually. Uh…yeah it was really good, super gross and I’m interested in Amherst. But anyways, the second story. Now, since Hive is still my favorite episode, I obviously REALLY liked this part. Not only because it’s a cool callback, but also because as much as I love the abstract, slam poetry-like storytelling in Hive, it does make the episode a little bit hard to follow at times, which I overall think adds to the horror, but getting a look at those events from someone who isn’t…basically dying was nice. So, the first thing here I find intriguing is the wasp’s nest in Jane’s attic. Firstly, I already thought it was responsible for what happened to her, but this just confirms it, because…ew, I don’t like this thing. It might have produced one of if not the rawest line in the entire story so far but…ew. (Also, this doesn’t connect to the wasp’s nest but I don’t know where else to put it; Jordan mentions a smashed TV in Jane’s attic, which reminds me of the episode Arachnophobia, and the spiders clearly have some sort of antagonistic relationship with The Flesh Hive so…hm…) But, here’s the more intriguing part. The wasp’s nest is described as being unnaturally spongey, and both it, Amherst and Jane are all easily flammable. (also did Amherst die there? Or do we just not know? And like, I know we like to joke about all of the Micheals, but there’s a lot of Johns as well. Ok I’m getting sidetracked.) Now, a couple of people in the YouTube comments pointed out that both of those are cited as features of vampires. And now that I think about it, isn’t it weird that Trevor Herbert, a vampire hunter, somehow knew how to deal with some sort of weird sickness that was seemingly entirely outside of his deal? Unless…the two of them are directly connected. Tma already has a pretty unique depiction of vampires, so to make them Flesh Hive people would honestly just be icing on the cake. Granted what little we’ve seen of vampires doesn’t really have many themes of disease or bugs but…I don’t know, it could work! God…I am still really befuddled by Trevor. Like, how did he survive? Was the person with him Basira’s cop friend? Ugh god I’m getting sidetracked again. Anyways, this story from Jordan is all fine and good, it’s nice to get some more context on Episode 32…but things get really interesting when we see more of Jane’s landlord, Arthur Nolan.

So, this guy was mentioned all the way back in Hive, and if I’m being honest, I…did not think much of him initially. His death in a fire seemed a little suspicious, but all things considered..I had more pressing matters on the mind after that episode. But…wow. Turns out this guy is a lot more important than I initially assumed. (Side note: As I’m writing this, I just realized I finally understand why The Flesh Hive hates the institute. It’s probably because it’s home to another one of ✨the horrors✨! Sorry, it’s just that I’m really realizing a lot of new things about my favorite episode lmao.) Obviously, Arthur Nolan has clear knowledge of the threat that The Flesh Hive poses, so much so that even though he’s a landlord (which is probably the scariest thing in the entire episode), he was willing to burn the entire building and even sacrifice himself if it meant getting rid of that wasp’s nest. Now, not only is that a testament to how fucking scary The Flesh Hive is, but…there’s some other really weird things about Arthur. He didn’t just burn down the building on a whim, because according to Jordan, his flat was extremely warm, and he had an intricate scar on his chest that looked both like a flame and a face in pain. …And all of these connections to heat and fire are just a little bit too suspicious for me to ignore. I’ve had some time to think about it, and I think Arthur Nolan was likely connected to the Sumerian demon Asag, maybe even a part of the same cult that Diego Molina was a part of, and that also seemed to be responsible for the events of Burnt Offering. The general connection to heat is one thing, but just…once again, the fact that he knew how to deal with The Flesh Hive shows a great enough understanding of ✨the horrors✨ from him. And if my classification of ✨the horrors✨ is somewhere along the lines of being correct, then that means The Flesh Hive is opposed to, and likely weak to at least three of them. Those are the eyes associated with The Keays and The Institute, the spiders, and Asag. So…yeah. That about wraps it up on the statement of Jordan Kennedy. In conclusion, Amherst and Jane are clearly connected, The Flesh Hive is weak to fire, it has some strange similarities with vampires, Arthur Nolan has…some sort of relevance, and even though Jane is dead…this story is far from over.

So, what about post-statement and the supplemental? Well, truth be told, there isn’t much here that I haven’t already gone over, outside of two things. Firstly, I found it really weird that Jon said The Flesh Hive “doesn’t seem like the sort of being that would work well with others.” In my opinion…I feel like this kind of goes against the point. Sure, Jane was a walking corpse, but the whole point of The Flesh Hive was that it was…well, a hive, a hivemind. It functioned best when together, it gave Jane a twisted sort of love and affection, its whole goal was to infect more people. (Speaking of which, I think it would’ve been cool if we had gotten to see some more worm zombies than just Jane and Timothy Hodge. Eh, maybe we still will, who knows?) So…yeah, this just comes off as a weird thing for Jon to say in my opinion. But more interestingly, as short as the supplemental was, it does reveal that JON FINALLY GOT A GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP FUCK YEAH!!! Super happy for you king, now let’s PLEASE start making that a routine :). Also I do find it funny that the institute gets a fuck-ton of fake statements in Halloween season, that’s just perfect. Well…since I don’t have much more to say, I might as well just mention a largely unrelated theory I’ve been having while I’m here. That kind of seems to be a running theme with this part of the post. Like, this episode is great on its own, but it really does just get me thinking about other stuff. So, something in the YouTube comments I found interesting was theory about how maybe there’s a “four horsemen of the apocalypse” thing going on here. The theory suggested that The Flesh Hive is pestilence, The Piper is war, The Reapers are death, and some unknown thing is famine, and the entire series is building up to some sort of apocalypse. Now, do I believe this theory. Honestly…no. The apocalypse idea just doesn’t have a lot of evidence right now, and there are many other beings like Micheal, The Anglerfish, the spiders, etc, that are just as, if not more weird and eldritch as the ones listed here. However…it did get me thinking. I pretty much entirely forgot about The Reapers for a hot second, and the more I thought about it…they really don’t connect to any of ✨the horrors✨ I’ve listed so far. The only possible connection is one of them showed up during a war like The Piper, but that honestly seems like a MASSIVE stretch that not even I’m willing to take. And I mean, Nathaniel Thorp did kind of imply The Reapers were at the whims of a higher power… So..I’d like to add a new being to ✨the horrors✨, one I’m dubbing “The Master of The Reapers” until further notice. While shrouded in mystery, I could absolutely see this thing being one of ✨the horrors✨. Now, I’m not going to update my list, because I’m still wavering on whether or not The Anglerfish and “Whatever The Other Circus worships” are the same being. If they are the same being, then I still probably have one more horror to uncover, assuming that my number of 14 is correct. But if they’re separate…well, consider the list complete until further notice! I know this might seem out of nowhere, but honestly…I’m pretty confident about this one. I’ll just have to wait and see how close to truth I end up getting. So…yeah! That’s Pest Control. Overall it was another great episode, and I’m very satisfied with how it followed up on my favorite, and with how it sets up a potential return of The Flesh Hive in the future.

Supplemental: Doing school from home while also having terrible ADD can make things very hard when trying to pay attention during online lectures. So, I have come up with a solution:

- Episode 56, Children of the Night 🛏️

Continued statement of Trevor Herbert, regarding the latter years of his career as a vampire hunter.

OH MY GOD. LITERALLY RIGHT AFTER I TALK ABOUT HIM AT LENGTH. TREVOR. THE FUCKING. TRAMP. APOLLO HAS GRANTED ME THE GIFT OF PROPHECY. So, needless to say, I was very excited when this episode began. I mean, I’ve been wondering about Trevor’s relevance in the story for quite a while now, so obviously I’d be very interested. So with that in mind…this episode is…kind of a weird one for me? Not bad, I still have a lot of good to say about it, it’s just…I don’t know. It might be due to the fact that it’s directly continuing off of a much earlier statement, and also the fact that parts of it are intentionally emitted, but…I have scrambled thoughts about this one. I’ll get into it as I go along, but for now…just know that this is a bit of a strange one, and it’s kind of hard for me to discuss. But regardless, was the episode good? Of course! All of them have been enjoyable and this one isn’t any different! I’m always up for a direct continuation of an older statement, which this season in particular has done a great job with, it’s nice to get confirmation of Trevor’s relevance, and it adds some interesting new elements to a plot point set up in an episode that in all honesty, if it wasn’t for the reveal that all the statements are real at the end of Season 1, I could’ve interpreted as complete bullshit if I wanted to. But with all of the preamble out of the way, let’s get into it!

Firstly, I’d like to talk a little bit about Trevor’s characterization here, and how it contrasts his previous statement, because I think it’s one of my favorite parts of the episode. In Episode 10, Trevor was…a bit more of a comedic character, or at the very least a notable standout. Compared to every other statement giver before him, and maybe even everyone after him so far, all of whom were unsure about what really happened to them with varying degrees of knowledge, Trevor seemed…entirely aware of what he was up against, which made him very memorable in my eyes. But while a little bit of that homeless tramp charm is gone here, I’ve got to say, I REALLY like the contrast in this episode. Here, Trevor isn’t fighting against vampires, he’s fighting against a seemingly completely different horror, and grappling with his murder of another human, both of which make him just as lost and scared as any other statement giver, and help to insert him into the modern story. While I do miss his earlier portrayal..I have to admit, seeing a man that was once much more sure of himself now be shaken like everyone else really puts into perspective how mysterious and terrifying everything is right now, and it’s a very interesting direction that for his character that I like a whole lot, and it makes me excited to see what happens with him next. I guess I also should mention the..odd lack of vampires here as well, considering he is THE vampire guy. Admittedly, while it is a little strange for them to not really be there, I did just write out a theory on how the previous episode connects to vampires so…I don’t know, I’m fine with it. But uh..anyways, what about the things that actually happen in the statement? Well, I feel like I should start off with the structure. Now, this is obviously a direct follow up to Vampire Killer, but not in the way that, let’s say…Tightrope follows up on Strange Music, more in the way that Desecrated Host follows up on Confession. The difference here is that Desecrated Host came right after Confession, while this episode is 46 after the one that contained the first part of the same statement. At the end of the day, I was still able to get a grasp of what was going on, since I still remembered Trevor’s initial story well enough, but…it was just a bit of a shock structurally. Combined with the fact that there are still more missing parts of this statement (which can obviously be resolved in the future, but as of now it’s still a bit of an annoyance), and this episode…just kind of throws you back in after a massive break from the storyline. Usually, episodes take their time getting into things a bit better, and even when they don’t, like in Infestation for example, you still expect those episodes to be chaotic based on what’s going on at the time. Here though…I don’t know, it’s nothing beyond redemption but…it just threw me off my course when I started listening. Honestly, I think a better way to handle it would’ve been to have Trevor submit a second statement entirely separate from Episode 10, since we already know that he didn’t pass away right after giving it like we thought, and it would’ve just allowed for some better flow. I know that was quite a lot of criticism, but ultimately, it’s nothing that can’t be fixed. It kind of reminds me of Episode 4. I initially found that one to be confusing as all heck, and while I still think it might just introduce a little bit too much for one episode, I’ve only grown to appreciate it more and more as I learn more about The Keays, The Leitners and Mike, and I think the same could go for this one. I plan to re-listen to tma one day, since there’s probably a lot that I’ve missed or that’ll be recontextualized, so who knows? Maybe I’ll look at this episode more fondly one day, but for now…the pacing was just a little too odd for me. Still though, if the institute can find those missing pieces and finish the statement, I think It’ll all be fine :). Ok, ENOUGH NEGATIVITY. Here’s some things that I actually liked.

Wow I got sidetracked. Ok, NOW I’m actually going to talk about what happened in the statement for real. So, while the stories here are pretty short, I think they’re actually very effective. I still kind of wish that we got to learn more about some of Trevor’s other huntings that are alluded to here, especially since the statement opens with one of those stories finishing, but I like what we got here as well, especially with the newfound unawareness in Trevor we see here. The first statement directly follows up on a minor plot point from Vampire Killer, and…wow. This was genuinely…very bleak. This is probably the only part of a statement that genuinely isn’t paranormal (at least as far as I’m concerned), and yet…it’s one of the scariest things I think this podcast has produced. Not in a shit-your-pants kind of way, it’s just…really depressing. There’s no strange explanation, no interference from ✨the horrors✨…just a sad scenario where a guy, who while not innocent did not deserve death, is murdered by a tortured soul out of said soul’s own trauma, convictions, addictions and mental state. Just…a really bleak and depressing scenario, and Trevor’s writing here really seals the deal. If you couldn’t tell, my favorite part of this episode is just Trevor in general, I already liked him a lot, but this episode really made him grow on me. Honestly…he might be one of the most terrifying statement givers so far. Not Jane levels, but…he’s just so morbidly conflicting. Because like, you UNDERSTAND him, you realize why he thought Alard was a vampire, you understand how deeply distraught he was after commuting the murder, and really do sympathize with him, and yet he still terrifies me. The way that he talks about the hunt being an addiction harder to remove than heroin, the way it becomes so clear that he’s become so traumatized and used to a life of stalking and killing monsters, that he can easily make a slip-up as grave as this…it’s just really depressing, and one of the best things about this episode by far. Ultimately, I don’t have much to theorize about here, since like I said, this doesn’t seem to be remotely paranormal, although I will say that the scars on Not!Stanley Kubrick (I know he’s not one of those things, I just think it’s funny wordplay) we’re pretty interesting. I doubt they were actually from Alard but…maybe Stanley had a chance encounter with some actual vampires. Hm.

The second story that Trevor tells us is..almost the inverse of the first one. It doesn’t have quite as much in terms of interesting character writing for him, but it does have some very interesting lore implications. Even then, I still think there’s some interesting character writing here. This was definitely the moment where Trevor’s life stopped becoming just about vampires, when he got involved with other parts of ✨the horrors✨, and it shows. Like, Jonny Sims REALLY did a great job with the delivery, even if it’s slightly less comedic than Trevor’s last appearance. It was also interesting how he talked about “things lurking in the dark”. That does feel very Divine Host core to me. (Oh btw, I’m just going to calm it The Divine Host now, because the full name is way too long lmao.) Honestly, given the name of the episode, I fully expected The Divine Host to play at least..a partial role in the story here, and yet…nothing. I mean, I know they played a role in at least one, most likely two very recent episodes but.. “Children of the Night?!” I mean, what does that rule even signify outside of “spooky monster?” Ok, I’m getting ahead of myself…what about what actually happened here? Well, I can’t really say much about Craig for the time being, due to the pitiful amount of information, but I can talk about the spider lady. This is the first time spiders have been prominent in a statement since..Hive I think, and given how I speculate spiders connect to one of ✨the horrors✨, I’m more than happy to see more of these little things, even though I did not expect it at all. But anyways, the thing that really caught my attention with this spider lady was just…how similar to Jane she was. I mean, she pulls Trevor in like the wasp’s nest tried to do with Jordan in the last episode, she’s described as being kind of greasy, gross and later hollow, and is crawling with insects! That’s literally just Diet Jane! …But that’s so weird to me. I talked at length about how I think Jane and Amherst are at the very least vampire-adjacent, but Trevor looks at this thing that is so similar to Jane, and goes out of his way to separate it from vampires as much as possible, so there’s already a hole in that theory made right after I proposed it. And secondly, the spiders are implied to have an antagonistic relationship with The Flesh Hive, what with them eating the worms and potentially forcing it to attack the institute early, so WHY DO THEY FUNCTION SO SIMILARLY?! Someone in the YouTube comments proposed that maybe the worms, spiders and ants are all against each other, and while that could explain Jon’s weird comment about how Jane and Amherst don’t seem like beings that would want to work together, it also..it just makes things so much more complicated at the moment. Because either I have to make ants their own thing (which forces me to make The Anglerfish the figure of worship for The Other Circus before I’ve even decided if that’s the route I want to go down), or I have to make all three bugs the same thing, and quite frankly, I CAN’T HANDLE THAT RIGHT NOW. …This whole podcast is one big mindfuck and I love it so much. So…yeah, this one spider lady is driving me insane, and I have no idea how Trevor is dealing with it now. And you know, on that note…I do have one more grievance.

I’m just going to add a quick disclaimer; I’m about to be so fucking petty. Look, like I’ve said a million times, I do still like this episode. In fact, as I’ve been writing this, and as I’ve been thinking more about what the episode does well, I’ve come to like it a lot more than I thought I did initially. The moral of the story is that first impressions are bullshit. But, I am basically tasking myself with documenting all of those first impressions, so here’s the thing. While I’m sure all of the strange mysteries surrounding Trevor will be solved eventually, and that all of these dumb complaints will mean nothing in the end…I was expecting a few more answers. The reveal of the reason for Trevor not dying just being that…Martin got the wrong idea was, while a completely acceptable answer in the long run, a little bit anticlimactic for me. I think I need to accept that as time goes on, there’s a very real possibility that the answers might not be as crazy as I thought (which in some cases is a good thing, holy shit I will get to that when I talk about the supplemental), and that’s ok. I just…I guess after wildly speculating about how he survived in my head for 20 episodes, I was a little disappointed. But on top of that, there was some other things I was really hoping to get answered. I was hoping for more information on how vampires function, more on that person who seemingly helped burn down Ivy Meadows, and just more on…what Trevor is doing right now. Like, what’s his goal? How far has he moved away from vampires, and onto something greater? And all of this wouldn’t be that big of a deal if Jon had bothered to question some of it himself. Like, I know I worry for him constantly digging down rabbit holes, but like, I’m doing it too, AND INSANE CONSPIRACY THEORISTS STICK TOGETHER GOD DAMNIT. But in all seriousness, I would’ve just liked him to speculate a bit more here, especially considering that it was him who revealed the identity of the old guy in Episode 36, not the actual statement giver. But like I said, please just understand that all of this is very nitpicky , and going on the assumption that most of these plot points get answers down the line, these complaints will likely be irrelevant one day. Also understand that I would not be bitching this much about something I don’t absolutely love, I do NOT have the mental stamina or the time to be a genuine hater. Even if I was initially a little bit disappointed by the lack of answers, and even if this isn’t my favorite episode in the season, it was still very good, which I’ve determined is the usual minimum quality for this podcast. While I hope to see some more answers in the future, this was still a worthwhile episode, and it gets me excited for what’s to come. Still a great time :).

But you know what, the statement could’ve been utter garbage and I’d still hold the episode in high regards due to the supplemental. Holy shit. Holy shit you guys. I’m not even breathing I’m hyperventilating at this point. So..Jon…man….I think it’s time for your sedation 💉💉💉💉💉💉💉💉💉💉💉💉💉💉💉 I…I don’t think this twink is doing too well everyone. Ugh, and this happens right after the episode where we get confirmation of a good night’s sleep for this “man”. This is by far the most unhinged he has ever been, and while I kind of love that..I am also terrified by it. Once again, I have to give serious props to Jonathan Sims (real life) for his deliveries, because HOLY FUCK HIS POOR VOCAL CORDS. The fact that a simple misunderstanding, one that occurred MONTHS before…not even this, but the fucking Prentiss attack, can drive him so far over the edge is NOT. A GOOD. SIGN. I’m coming to love unhinged Jon, and the sheer furious energy of this scene only makes me love him more, but POOR MARTIN. Like, this guy is the only person in this show I can look at and be fully confident he has done nothing wrong, and yet HE has to suffer being yelled at by his loser crush. And he handles it so well too it’s just UGH I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HE’S THE SWEETEST GUY AND I WANT ALL THE GOOD THINGS FOR HIM. He’s willing to expose his greatest secret to calm down Jon in a moment of emotional distress and, you know, if it wasn’t for all of the other shit that needs to be sorted, I would have Jon and Martin kiss right now. If there are plushies of them out there, please let me know, I would like to mash their faces together, and then tuck Martin into bed while I defenestrate Jon. Oh, and mentioning his secret…oh my god. 14 episodes of buildup, wondering what big secret Martin had…and this is the answer. I never expected him to be evil or anything, but I did expect the reveal to be pretty big and shocking…but no. He just…he just lied on his résumé. That. Is. ….peak comedy. Absolutely hilarious, ten out of ten. I am never going to forget this until the day I die. What an absolute icon of academia. He drops out of High School (Bri’ish) to support his mom, lies about PARAPSYCHOLOGY of all things on his résumé, and then some random stoner guy just recruits him, and the next thing he knows he is being hunted down by worms. He is the silliest guy known to man oh my god. This might just be the best example of a purposefully anticlimactic reveal I’ve ever seen, and that is saying something. And OH MY GOD IT MADE JON HAPPY! FUCKING YES! Now, I would say that I think this will help repair Jon and Martin’s relationship, and that Jon will finally calm down. The only problem is that I don’t actually think that, but…it’s progress. So, yeah, amazing supplemental, probably my favorite. Goodnight Tumblr, I hope you have dreams of squeezing Jon like a squeaky toy. :)

Supplemental: call me micheal the way i lure people into liminal spaces with my charm

- Episode 57, Personal Space 🔒

Statement of Carter Chilcott, regarding his time spent in isolation aboard the Space Station Daedalus in September 2007.

Everyone seems to say that you will eventually find an episode of tma that targets you specifically. I don’t really want to give a definitive answer as to what that episode is until I’m finished, but for now…this is absolutely that episode. Holy. Shit. What sins have I committed that warrant experiencing those 21 minutes of raw, unbridled fear? What does Rusty Quill have against me? And why is it that despite how fucking shaken I am, this is absolutely one of my favorite episodes in the entire series? Like, IT HAS NO RIGHT BEING THIS GOOD AFTER WHAT IT JUST DID TO ME. Wow…I’m still processing what I just witnessed. From the moment this episode started, I knew I was in for an experience, and while the plot is fairly simple without a whole lot of moving parts…that just makes it all the more terrifying and brilliant. I…have thoughts on this episode. Boy oh boy, do I have some thoughts. So…let’s just get into it as I try not to scream. Actually, I shouldn’t have to worry about that now that I think about it. After all, no one can hear you scream in space :,).

So the episode starts, and I’m already scared shitless. Usually there’s a bit more of a slow build towards the horror, but NOT HERE. They just threw me right in, and it was horrifying all throughout, yippee! Granted though, I haven’t really felt that since…Burnt Offering, I guess, but the feeling hasn’t been this strong since Hive so…yeah you can probably see why I love this episode so much. Carter’s speech at the beginning…haunted me. Thinking about how tiny and insignificant we are in the grand scheme of the universe is already pretty terrifying to me, but I at least find a little bit of comfort in the idea that we aren’t the only living things out there, that there’s more than just black void out in space. So to have Carter, this man who has seen the horrors of space firsthand immediately refute this idea with such conviction, while still standing by the idea that we are so finite…damn. So already, the episode is off to a great start, but what about the rest of it? Well, a lot of my more in depth thoughts only really come out when you consider what’s revealed to post-statement, so for now I’ll just talk about some neat and terrifying aspects of the episode that I found notable. Firstly, there’s some pretty clever imagery here with the names of certain things. Most people probably know the name of the space station, “Daedalus” as the name the father of Icarus from Greek myth. You know, that guy who knew jack shit about how heat works? Well, Daedalus was also the guy who built the labyrinth, which was notably used to imprison and isolate certain people and monsters. These references to isolation continue with Carter watching “28 Days Later”, a film that deals with such a topic. Just thought those were some cool references. But, on the note of the name Daedalus, I did find it a little bit interesting that one of Carter’s hallucinations was that of the door opening. It’s probably a stretch, but…given how Micheal’s backrooms were kind of reminiscent of the labyrinth, I do wonder if there’s a connection there…hm. But anyways! What about all of the terrifying stuff? Well, I don’t have that much to say about the spacesuit, as I honestly have…no idea what that was supposed to mean, outside of providing false hope of seeing another person, but…everything else was freaky as shit. The earth being gone, the cameras being cut…and the message on the lock. Holy fuck. That will haunt me in my nightmares. “NO ONE IS COMING” is the new “Take her not me”. …I don’t know if the code in the safe has any significance though. And like…can I just talk about how tragic and traumatized of a character Carter is? Like it still amazes me that this show can make episodes about people nailing meat to their walls, and then make THIS, AND BOTH OF THEM STILL WORK REGARDLESS. Just…the fact that this guy was putting in all that effort to get prepared for the experiment, STILL experienced all of that psychological torture, and tried to kill himself in order to get out of what he genuinely considered to be hell (that part also haunted me)…what a poor soul. Honestly my only complaint with this episode was that we never got to learn if Carter was ok or not. I NEED him to be ok. So…yeah, that’s just an assortment of notable observations and things that scared me. But with all of that out of the way, it’s time I talk about the bigger implications. At the end of the episode, we learn that the Daedalus operation was being run by The Fairchilds and The Lukas Family, and at the very least had some involvement from The Divine Host. And..I certainly have some thoughts about this.

I’ll start off by covering The Fairchilds, as they’re probably the least I have to say about in this scenario. Firstly, I do love that the two big rich eldritch horror families are working together, I think that’s pretty funny, but secondly…yeah, their involvement here just makes sense. I don’t have much more to say about it. I mean, it seems like the family definitely serves the being called The Vast, and given that we are in the VAST void of space, it makes perfect sense for them to be involved here, since such an experiment allows them to throw people into an endless void without even having to use cosmic powers, and we already knew that they worked in aerospace so…yeah, it’s not a surprise to know that they were involved. If I had to guess, I’d assume they were responsible for the empty space suit and the earth, sun and moon disappearing, since both of those deal with some sort of emptiness. Outside of that, all we really learn is that they have a collaboration with The Lukas Family, which is pretty interesting. (Side Note, this episode is currently battling with Literary Heights when it comes to what my current favorite episode of the season is, so…yeah, The Vast does good work.) But mentioning The Lukas Family, what about them? Well, to my understanding, they have the biggest involvement in the experiment. I mean, I think The Fairchilds probably did the most when it came to developing Daedalus itself, but the experiment itself was probably manned by The Lukas Family. We already know they have a habit of isolating people, as show in the other two episodes they’ve been involved in, and obviously the experiment was being manned by Conrad Lukas. (Side note: Considering his mention here, as well as the fact he owns the company that the crew of The Tundra works for, I assume that Nathaniel Lukas is likely the “ruler” of The Lukas Family, and if it’s a Manson-esque cult like I think it might be based on vibes, then he would be the cult leader.) So yeah, I definitely think this episode’s threats are mostly provided by The Lukas Family, which includes things like the lock, the clock stopping, Carter’s weird dreams (which are of graveyards and an open sea, both of which relate to one of the previous Lukas episodes each), and…potentially the cutting of the camera, although that could go multiple ways. So yeah, this episode doesn’t give us that much new information on The Lukas Family, but it does still show us a new member, provides a connection to The Fairchilds, and also shows another strange action of theirs, which is more than enough. But before I get on to the final group, I have a couple of other things I want to briefly discuss. Those things are the food, and the other crew members.

Now, I don’t exactly know what group or power was responsible for infinitely restocking the food, but I think I might have a hunch as to what the food was doing. It’s implied that when Carter nearly starved himself to death, his colleagues took him back to Earth before he died, but I have to wonder if that’s not the case. You see, so much of what happened to Carter…shouldn’t be possible. Obviously The Fairchilds and The Lukas Family set some things up, and can make paranormal things happen, but as far as we’re concerned, none of them were actually onboard so…how would you get all of this weird stuff to happen when there’s no one who can make it happen. Well…there might be an answer to this. Some other people also pointed out something similar in the YouTube comments but…I have to wonder if Daedalus was just a simulation. I know that is a bold claim, but think about it. In a simulation, anything as illogical as what happened on the station could happen perfectly fine, without needing a Fairchild or Lukas on board. So maybe…the food was keeping Carter inside the simulation, and when he stopped eating he simply woke up. It’s still entirely possible that he did starve himself, and that he really was in space, and that his colleagues did bring him back down…but I really like the simulation idea. It makes the whole thing even more tragic and terrifying, because it would mean that Carter never even got to go to space in the first place…which admittedly might be a blessing for him nowadays, but still. And then we have the matter of the the other two astronauts. There’s two possibilities when it comes to what role they play here. The simplest answer is to assume that they were just there in case of emergency, maybe also there to make Carter’s despair greater, since he KNEW there were others outside his confinement. But the thing is, they apparently were also there to do their own experiments, and while that could be a lie…I have to wonder. You see, there’s likely three factions, each serving one of ✨the horrors✨, in charge of the Daedalus operation, yet Carter’s experiment has a clear bias towards The Lukas Family and their desire to isolate. So, what if the other two astronauts were being put through their own torture experiments by The Fairchilds and The Divine Host respectively? And if Daedalus is actually just a simulation…what if they’re still in there? I mean, Carter never ACTUALLY saw them, so…I genuinely do not know. This idea can go either ways, and both of them make me squirm with fear. But with all of those theories out of the way, we have but one more thing to talk about, that being The Divine Host.

So, The Divine Host isn’t actually mentioned by name here, but they absolutely have some level of involvement with what’s going on. This is because Optic Solutions Ltd., the company that provided the cameras, are stationed in Ny-Ålesund. Ny-Ålesund was mentioned in Growing Dark, an episode that VERY clearly featured The Divine Host (or whatever it’s called nowadays), and was listed as the coldest place in the world where the nights are longest. Natalie Ennis kind of implied that the church was going somewhere, so I suspect that Ny-Ålesund is where they’re stationed nowadays…likely to do something very bad. Now, it’s entirely possible that The Divine Host’s involvement here is the same as that of The Fairchilds and The Lukas Family. They’ve launched people into space or a simulation, and want to do some freaky experiments. That makes perfect sense, and I’d assume they’re responsible for…well, obviously the cameras, but probably the 20 minute blackout as well. However…I have to wonder if their involvement was a little bit more antagonistic. Obviously they were involved in the experiment but…maybe not in the same way as the other two groups. You see, I just find it weird that The Divine Host would go out of its way to set up a camera, and then secretly cut the wires to make Carter feel more isolated, not only because that’s kind of elaborate and unnecessary, but also because the isolation is more of a Lukas Family thing. Sure, it could pray on the fear of being alone in the dark but…I don’t know, it’s weird. And mentioning that, outside of the darkness of space, The Divine Host seems to have the least reason to be involved this experiment. Hell, even when the earth, sun and moon disappeared, there were still shining stars visible. So I’m just think that while the idea that they’re working alongside the other two groups makes sense, it’s also possible that maybe…maybe they were trying to sabotage the experiment. Maybe they set up the camera in an attempt to lessen Carter’s isolation, but it was later cut by The Lukas Family. Maybe the blackout was a result of them trying to cut the experiment short. And this makes more sense when you consider the fact that even though The Magnus Institute isn’t really involved with this experiment, The Lukas Family, who is, is a strong ally of the institute. And assuming that the institute connects to the eye monster in Alexandria, and that the Divine Host opposes that monster due to their closed eye symbol…then they’d have every reason to go after a faction that allies itself with their enemy. And OH MY GOD, I just remembered that someone in the YouTube comments pointed out that maybe The Divine Host killed Gertrude, since screams were heard coming from Hither Green Chapel on the day of her death, and as archivist for the institute she’s probably be their enemy, and…ajdjfhejhfjdjsjdjjfjdjjd. ….Ok, I’m absolutely spiraling out of control here. Simply put, I find The Divine Host’s involvement here the most interesting overall, and I think it could easily go in multiple different directions. It’s connections to The Fairchilds, The Lukas Family and likely The Magnus Institute are all very interesting, and I’m just very excited to see everything start coming together.

Wow. What an episode. This is at the very least my second favorite episode of Season 2 after Literary Heights, and it might even top that. The main character and themes of isolation and mental trauma were both relatable and absolutely terrifying for me, the connections between different factions it provides are all extremely interesting, and I really hope to see more of Daedalus in the future. As for the supplemental…well, there’s definitely quite a few things worth mentioning here. Firstly, I’ve noticed that Jon is getting a lot sloppier when it comes to hiding his activity. His meeting with Elias, as well as him admitting he doesn’t trust his assistants on a main recording once was already something, but this is just reckless and…I’m very concerned by that. Secondly, his dialogue here implies a future statement regarding Hill Top Road and the children who lived in that house, which is super exciting! Hill Top Road hasn’t shown up since Episode 19/20, and the children haven’t been mentioned since Episode 8. It’s a very interesting part of the lore to me, and hopefully I’ll learn more about what happened to all the kids living there soon enough. But while that’s all intriguing…we then have Not!Sasha. Firstly…it is CERTAINLY interesting that she asked Jon not to record their conversations. Why is that? Hm? Is it because the audio is weird? CARE TO ELABORATE?! As for the items in her desk, well, the ripped paper could be anything, from scrap to actual torn apart documents (I’m implied to believe the latter, unfortunately), and as for her boyfriend…well there’s a few possible explanations for that. Tom, if that is his “real” name, is described as looking like a stock photo. I hope he too is some sort of monster, but it’s also possible he’s like…a wax figure or something, or maybe Not!Sasha is just editing herself into stock photos, idk. Either way…her behavior is as concerning as ever. So yeah…that sure was an episode. …I’m going to go curl up into a hall now, I think I’ve been a bit too scared today…

Supplemental: Regarding the idea of The Divine Host killing Gertrude, it does seem a little bit obvious, and I’m still most suspicious of Elias, but I will admit that it’s a pretty compelling argument and it makes me suspicious.

- Episode 58, Trail Rations🍴

Unsigned statement regarding potential cannibalism while attempting to travel the Oregon Trail.

…That was nothing like the Starkid musical :(. No lobsters whatsoever. Ok, self indulgent jokes aside, this was a pretty decent one. I don’t have TOO much to say about it, (which is fine given how much I’ve been saying about recent episodes), but I still thought it was a pretty good…if pretty disgusting episode. It definitely has one of the best and most unique framing devices so far, an interesting protagonist and plot line, and a couple of potential connections to other episodes as well. Unfortunately though…my thoughts are just kind of simple, so my commentary will be noticeably more brief than usual. But, with all of that out of the way, let’s talk about yet another episode that displays a normal life in America!

Starting off, I have to say that one of my favorite aspects of this episode is by far the general premise. If you’ve had a U.S. education, then you’ve inevitably read at least a couple of excerpts from Oregon Trail journals, (and also probably played the game based on them, which is a certified classic), so you would therefore know that they are historically freaky as shit. Like. GOD. The things that happen there are…yikes. So I’m very happy that they decided to make an episode based on it, since it feels like a great thing to take inspiration from. And honestly, it really does read like an actual Oregon Trail journal…just if the circumstances were even more dire. Oh god, and speaking of that writing style, what about that opening. I always love it when tma displays the psychological state of its protagonists, and the opening did a really great job doing so. Anyways, what about the statement itself? Well, another thing I really liked about it was the protagonist, Mrs. Carlisle. It’s always a pleasure to have a genuinely intelligent protagonist in any horror story (hence why we stan Joshua Gillespie) and I really liked how she was portrayed as the smartest person in the story, as I feel that’s an unfortunate rarity among women in old-timey stories. It’s just a shame that she was too late to save her husband, I honestly felt really bad for her. As for the rest…well, I thought Eustace Wick was a pretty intimidating, if kind of fun antagonist, and the part where Benjamin tells his wife to eat him after death…yikes. That was…certainly morbid. Lastly, I did really like the ambiguity on Mrs. Carlisle’s fate, while it seems unlikely it does give me hope she survived, and I do have other reasons to believe that which I’ll get into in a second. And…yeah! That’s about it for my general thoughts on the episode. It’s just a very brutal and sad tale about one of the most brutal and sad journeys in U.S. history, with a great framing device and protagonist. I like it! But, there are definitely some notable connections to previous episodes, so I’ll make sure to go over that.

So, starting off, I definitely think that this episode connects to the member of ✨the horrors✨ with a relation to bones and meat, and that Eustace Wick is a servant of it. Granted, he doesn’t display supernatural abilities like The Boneturner, but his prayer towards meat instead of Jesus makes me think he definitely serves this being, and that cannibalism is a part of the process. But that prayer actually adds a new element to this body horror thing, that being an…oddly religious one. This whole religious aesthetic is very present throughout the entire episode, and I find it pretty interesting. Granted, there are multiple cults that seemingly serve different powers, but none of them really take much from real-world religions as far as I’m concerned, outside of Asag being a Sumerian demon. This however…is very overtly Christian in its aesthetic, and I just find that kind of interesting. It also REALLY reminds me of Confession and Desecrated Host. These episodes are among the few that prominently feature Christianity so far, and if you recall, Edwin Burroughs ends up committing cannibalism after having his mind plagued by ✨the horrors✨. It does make me wonder if maybe the college students he ate also compelled him to, at least through his point of view, but unlike Mrs. Carlisle he actually gave in. The only problem is that I think he was being plagued by Asag, due to the amount of heat in Hill Top Road, and I’d be surprised in Asag and the body horror thing are the same. Then again, it’s possible Edwin was subjected to multiple members of ✨the horrors✨, since there was an eye in the window of the church he saw, he walked through a twisted version of his home like Antonio Blake, and the whole thing was seemingly influenced by Breekon and Hope, who are seemingly most allied with The Other Circus, not Asag, so…I don’t know, I could definitely see there being a connection here with religious cannibalism. Another connection that everyone and their mother has pointed out is the last name of our protagonist and her husband, that being “Carlisle”. This is notable as we have already heard that name via Toby Carlisle, who conveniently also showed up in the 18th episode of a season, and had connections to meat. So, I am definitely of the impression that Toby Carlisle is a descendant of our protagonist, which is why I suspect she might have actually survived and made her way to Oregon in the end, but I guess only time will tell if that’s the case. But if that’s the case, then it makes me believe that whatever Eustace was working with…followed her even after she let the cave, and might have continued to haunt her family centuries down the line. The main question posed by Jon in The Man Upstairs was where Toby got the meat…and nowadays, I definitely think that the meat…got him. And lastly, we have what is probably the biggest point of interest here, that being…why in the hell is this journal even here. Mrs. Carlisle never submitted a statement to The Magnus Institute, and yet it is still here within the archives. So…what the fuck. This means that Jonah Magnus, or maybe someone working for him, went out of their way to go to some random cave in Idaho or whatever, and retrieve this journal that, by all means, might not even be paranormal at a first glance. Obviously what happened was terrifying, but Eustace could’ve just been some random psychopath, and Benjamin telling his wife to eat him could’ve easily been written off as hallucinations derived from starvation, fatigue or trauma. We only know it’s paranormal because Jon has to record it on tape, meaning it is very real and important. But like…what the fuck was going on with Jonah? Why and how did he find this single journal inside of some guy’s corpse? Why was it so important? WHAT DID HE KNOW AND WHAT WAS HIS PROBLEM?! God…I’ve got nothing against overworked Victorian men that possess potentially homosexual relationships with their correspondences, but you are all so annoying god bless.

Well…that was a short one. Yeah…I do quite like this episode as a fun individual tale, but I just don’t have much to say about it that isn’t already blatantly obvious. Still though, I’m glad I was able to glean the information I was able to, and it definitely does bring up some interesting revelations about Jonah and the meat. As for the supplemental…oh thank god they’ve suggested therapy. I mean, it’s a shame it hasn’t exactly worked, but I’m glad I’m not alone in thinking that. Also, I now just feel really shitty for kind of forgetting about Tim. Granted, it’s hard to when you’re listening to what’s going on with Jon all the time, but…yeah, Tim also got pretty fucked up, didn’t he! AND THE FACT THAT HIM WORRYING MAKES JON MORE SUSPICIOUS GRRRRR. Either way, I’m glad that him and Martin are trying to do something to help him…I still think knocking him out with a brick would be a good idea but that might just be me. And on one final note…I-I still can’t get over the fact that revealing he lied on his résumé was what Martin needed to make Jon trust him. That is…possibly the funniest workplace scenario I’ve ever heard. Recording ends or whatever.

Supplemental: I said this one was exceptionally short, but then I looked back at my first of these posts and…yeah nevermind I’m actually pretty satisfied with the length here. Me three months ago was a little coward who couldn’t be bothered to write anything meaningful down lmao. …Or maybe I was just a lot more sane I don’t know.

- Episode 59, Recluse 🍏

Statement of Ronald Sinclair, regarding his years spent in a teenage halfway house on Hill Top Road, Oxford.

HOLY FUCK. HOOOOOOOOOLLLLLY FUCK. I. WHAT. I’M GOING ABSOLUTELY INSANE I AM AT MY FUCKING LIMIT WHAT THE FUCK. Hold on, I should stop using the devil’s tongue, lest Raymond Fielding throw me to the spiders. I…I am not ok. This episode…did so much. It gave so many answers but also SO many questions, validated one of my earliest theories, and…well it’s just making me spiral out of control. It was absolutely fantastic all things considered, but…oh my god. I’m pretty proud of myself for keeping up with things up until this point, but…am I even going to be able to do that anymore? Is this some kind of sick joke being played by god to punish me for my hubris, where he sends me into the never ending chasm of knowledge as I search for the answers at the bottom that doesn’t exist? ANSWER ME YOU SICK BASTARD. So…I’m happy we got another Hill Top Road statement! Definitely a very interesting part of the lore to me but…wow that’s a lot of lore. Unfortunately, I was being an inconclusive little coward when I wrote my “thoughts” on the other Hill Top Road statements, so before I get into the events of this episode and the truckload of implications it provides, I’m going to a brief overview of what’s currently known about this house and it’s history, as it’s very important to understanding what happens here. So…let’s start with a brief recap. May god have mercy on my mind. …How dare Jonny jumpscare me after the Oregon Trail cannibalism episode.

So, what did we know about Hill Top Road before this episode? Well, the house was bought by Walter Fielding in 1891, inherited by Alfred Fielding in 1924 and then inherited again by Raymond Fielding in 1957. Raymond was a devout churchgoer who used the house as a place where teenage runaways and young people with mental problems could stay and be rehabilitated. At some point in time, a young girl named Agnes showed up, who some presumed to be Raymond’s actual daughter. When she showed up, more and more of the kids living there disappeared, until it was just her and Raymond when she was a young adult, with the latter saying all of the other kids had simply moved on. Eventually, Raymond disappeared, followed by a few local pets and a five-year old boy. In 1974, a week after the boy disappeared, the house burnt down, with Raymond’s corpse being found within, his hand severed. Agnes was nowhere to be found. Now, the timeline gets a little bit tricky here, since Ivo Lensik and Edwin Burroughs’s statements do not line up chronologically, seemingly due to mistakes on the writer’s part. I’m just going to go with Ivo’s statement for simplicity’s sake, so let’s just say that in 2006, Ivo Lensik started re-construction on the dilapidated house, eventually tearing down the tree in the backyard and destroying the box beneath it. He also met a man who claimed to be Raymond Fielding, who observed the tree in the backyard, before leaving the house with singes on the floor. On the same day, Edwin Burroughs seemingly reached the peak of his demonic possession and insanity, which eventually led to him cannibalizing two college students and being given two life sentences at HMP Wakefield. He also lost the ability to say words like “God” or “Jesus”, and to do prayer. According to Martin, one Agnes Montague was found to have hung herself in Sheffield on the day of Ivo tearing down the tree, with a severed hand (presumably that of Raymond Fielding) tied to her waist, seemingly having died the same day she did. However, this Agnes was aged 26, which could not have been the same age as the Agnes who lived on Hill Top Road. And I’m just going to say it right now: I think Ms. Montague is a younger relative of the Agnes on Hill Top Road, and that the reason Raymond’s hand was said to have died the day she did was because Raymond only truly died either when he left the house for one last time, or when Edwin performed an exorcism, and that man who claimed to be him was indeed a ghost. So…yeah. Quite the complicated history surrounding this place. In short, there was a creepy house with two creepy people, it burned down killing one of them, the fate of the other is up in the air although someone who at the very least has connections to her died in 2006, and now the house is dilapidated and haunted as all hell. Overall a mysterious history, but while we are still missing a lot of pieces, this episode gave a lot more insight into what was going on here. So, let’s FINALLY get into it, as well as my overall thoughts on this…absolute ride of a story.

First of all, I just want to say I’m very happy that we got this statement two episodes after it was teased, because I never want to have to bear the burden of waiting 10 episodes for Hive ever again. Anyways, going over the basics first, this episode comes from the perspective of Ronald Sinclair, one of the teenagers who stayed at the house during the 60’s. Not only does this give us a look at what Hill Top Road was like before it burned down, which is just really cool, and makes the other statements even creepier now that we know what happened, but it also made me realize…man. I hate the justice system! Like, I know that Ronald was somewhat troublesome, but that is not how you treat abused children. Actually, how did they not figure out what was going on when the children disappeared? Like…did they just not care to go looking for them. Or was there a more sinister answer….oh no. Anyways, I felt really bad for Ronald, and I’m not surprised that he’s still suffering from the trauma to this day. And that is…pretty much all of the surface level thoughts I have on this episode. Yeah, this one is just so full of back to back reveals and implications that I really don’t have much more to say outside of my wild speculation so…I might as well just get into the real meat right now. The main thing this episode does for us is reveal more about the relationship between Raymond Fielding and Agnes. Initially, Burned Out kind of led me to believe that Raymond was a victim of the creepy girl named Agnes, but now we know that while there’s still quite a lot of mystery surrounding the latter, that information was meant to deceive, and the truth is quite the opposite. So let’s talk about…what the fuck is even happening.

I’m just going to cut to the chase: Raymond Fielding was a massive dick. And also a servant of ✨the horrors✨. Seemingly the one associated with spiders. So, at the end of this episode, we learn that Raymond was secretly killing the children who “left” the house, and then started using their bodies as egg sacks for spiders. First of all…ew. Second of all…WHAT?! This was…a very shocking reveal, especially with its timing in the episode, but it also just makes my brain go WILD. Like…WHY was he doing this? What is the purpose of having all of these spiders? How did the authorities never find out? How many children did he kill? What about his ancestors before him? I just…SSDHHJGGGHHH. Now, Raymond’s methods seem to mostly tie into the table…but that’s its own can of worms, so I’ll get into that later. All I’m saying is that this man was absolutely terrifying, and I am GLAD that he’s seemingly dead for real now. But while this is certainly a shocking reveal, it also reveals some interesting new information about the spiders. They’re tied to control. You see, throughout the episode Ronald and other kids…didn’t necessarily feel like they were being controlled, but just…urged to do things that they usually wouldn’t do. And while I’m glad that an eldritch god still cares about good hygiene and morals…kind of, this was still creepy as fuck, and at the end, Ronald is DEFINITELY being mind controlled as he head into Raymond’s basement. (Side note: I will never not think of Micheal whenever there’s mentions of a creepy door opening.) So this is clearly another power of Raymond’s, but it also applies to the spiders in general. For example, in Arachnophobia, Carlos Vittery was forced to kill the spider from his childhood over and over again, until eventually meeting a fate…very similar to his friends. In Children of the Night, Trevor felt a very similar compulsion when he met the anonymous lady filled with spiders, and Jonathan Archivist Sims himself was compelled to smash a spider on his wall for…no apparent reason, which then led to the worst day of his life (so far.) And while these incidents didn’t involve spiders all that much, need I remind you that Ivo Lensik destroyed the tree out of a strange compulsion, and that Edwin Burroughs said words against his will, and both of those incidents took place at Hill Top Road. So…yeah, the spiders definitely have this interesting relationship with control, and as much as I like to and still will do my best to connect Micheal to everything (please come back baby I miss you so much)…I might unfortunately have to agree with Not!Sasha describing the pattern on the table as a web. I no longer think she was just saying that due to her personal relationship with it…I think she was telling the truth. So yeah! Raymond Fielding was a shitty spider man with mind control powers, how delightful! But while this is…obviously very terrifying, we can at least find some solace in the fact that there was one person who could combat him. That person was dear old Agnes. Holy shit, where to begin with Agnes.

Like I said, I was initially unnerved by Agnes, even in this episode. I thought that Raymond was a sweet old man who ended up being one of Agnes’ numerous victims. Now, while she is still a little bit spooky, I realize that the truth was the stark opposite. Agnes showed up at Hill Top Road two months before Ronald was to “leave”, which seems to discredit the idea that Raymond was her actual father, unless his motivation for murdering children was divorce. If she’s not his actual daughter, then her appearance there is all the more strange, because…why? Well, either way, I’m glad she showed up, because before Ronald left, she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. And later on, right before he was about to become a spider nest, said cheek erupted in hot searing pain, and broke him from Raymond’s control. This shows us that Agnes was a hero, and hopefully means that no children after Ronald died…although I’d still be cautious of that assumption. But this gets me thinking about Agnes’ power. You see, I initially thought Hill Top Road was associated with Asag, due to the whole heat thing going on. Now, you’d assume that after this episode I’d come to the conclusion that the house is haunted by the spiders, but hear me out for a second…why not both? Agnes herself is anything but a servant of the spiders, and has these connections to heat, so what if there’s actually TWO beings haunting Hill Top Road. Both Asag and the spiders reside there, residual forces left behind by Agnes and Raymond, who burn and control those who come into their house. It’s interesting that someone so young could forge a connection to such a powerful and horrific force, and I have to wonder if she even connects to that mysterious cult at all, since she doesn’t seem to be a member. Either way, it’s very interesting that we now have two members of ✨the horrors✨ who are weak to heat and fire…makes me wonder more about how The Flesh Hive and the spiders are connected…also why the hell was Raymond a churchgoer if he was clearly worshiping something else? Or was he not? Was it all just a ruse to keep the neighbor’s suspicions at bay? Or was the church also full of spider worshippers? Is that why the neighbors all hated the children? WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON IN THIS HOUSE?! …did you know that Basira’s colleague Daisy mentioned spider husk people in MAG 43? Idk, where else am I going to mention that? So yeah, Agnes was definitely a much better person then I anticipated…but this relationship between her and Raymond still leaves a lot to be desired. While this episode sheds a lot of light on what was going on when Hill Top Road was still a halfway house…there’s also quite a bit that needs to be unpacked about it’s future. There’s a lot left to understand. And I am GOING to understand.

So, welcome to the ✨theoretical timeline of Raymond Fielding’s halfway house on Hill Top Road, Oxford until further notice✨, starting after Ronald Sinclair escaped from his spidery clutches. So, according to Anna Kasuma, all of the children left (or were killed) when Agnes was 18 or 19, with it just being her or Raymond in the house, so that’s roughly eight years after she first arrived and started saving people, starting off with Ronald. …And that also means that she was there past the age she was supposed to leave, making her appearance there blatantly different from that of every other child. Now, Raymond clearly knew that something was…off with Agnes, and I doubt it would’ve taken him eight whole years to realize how she was helping people. So why didn’t he just…kill her? Well, Ronald thought that Raymond was afraid of her, and I’m inclined to agree. If Agnes’ power was capable of severing the control over the kids, then I think it’s safe to say that Raymond knew not to trifle with her out of fear for his own life. I think they spent the next eight years locked in a stalemate, where Raymond kept on trying to kill his kids (that is a sentence), and Agnes kept on trying to save them. (lmao, imagine being weak in the face of an eleven year old, get fucked bozo). It’s said that around this time, Raymond went missing, followed by local pets and a five year old boy. Now, Burned Out made me suspect Agnes was behind this, and I mean…that could still be the case. I can’t say with certainty that Agnes was 100% good, I mean she does have eldritch god powers and looks like the twins from The Shining. But…I still think this was Raymond’s doing. Because, think about it for a moment. Raymond’s body was found in his house, meaning that he couldn’t have gone far. And according to Ronald, he was a recluse who never left the house outside of church, to the point where neighbors would often worry about him. If Raymond simply stopped going to church, which he very well could’ve given that there was no one to go with at this point, then people might’ve just proclaimed him missing because they never saw him anymore. So, maybe those pets and that young boy ended up becoming his new prey now that the house was almost empty. And while I can excuse child murder, I draw the line at animal cruelty. Fuck you Raymond, everyone hates you. (If you’re wondering why I hate him so much more than any other antagonist so far…I don’t know, I need someone to vehemently hate so it might as well be him.) Anyways, it was after the disappearance of the young boy that the house burned down, and I’m inclined to attribute this to Agnes due to her likely connections to Asag. I think she burned the house down, killing Raymond in the process, and fled with his severed hand for…some reason. However, due to the fact that the place was home to two servants of eldritch gods…things probably god freaky. Whatever powers Raymond and Agnes served still lay dormant in that abandoned house to this day, burning and controlling whoever walks inside, explaining what happened to Ivo and Edwin. Finally, we have the matter of Raymond and Agnes’ fates, along with…that tree. That damned tree. I…still have no idea what the fuck is up with this thing. It’s like…THE thing that this episode avoided giving answers on. Still though, I’ll try to rationalize what I can, although this is where my thoughts get a lot more muddy.

So, Raymond seemingly persisted as ghost into the future, and I personally think he was tied to the tree. It would explain why the tree was bleeding, and also why his box was underneath it, although why, when, and how he was tethered to it, as well as who tethered him to it and put the box underneath (who is most likely Agnes but that’s still subject to change), is a complete mystery. Either way, I think Ivo’s destruction of the tree and box, Edwin’s exorcism, or both is what led to Raymond truly dying, explaining why what is presumably his hand was found to have died on the day Ivo and Edwin visited. This is very very speculative, but it’s the best I can do when trying to rationalize the timeline. As for Agnes…she’s even MORE difficult to pin down! I initially said that I think Agnes Montague is not the same person as the Agnes from Hill Top Road, but is still related, likely biologically. This is because she was of an age much younger than Hill Top’s Agnes should’ve been. However, I will concede that there’s a slight possibility she is the ghost of Hill Top’s Agnes in the same way as Raymond, explaining why she looks 26, as she wouldn’t have really aged. However, I think there are a few flaws in this way of thinking. First of all, assuming that Hill Top burned down around the time Agnes was 18 or 19, the chances of her being 26 and dying in the burnt down house are ultimately hard to pin down. It’s not impossible for that to be the case, but I can’t be certain. Secondly, I’m playing by traditional ghost rules when discussing Raymond, in that I believe he was bound to the tree, and the house by extension. But Ms. Montague was found dead in a Sheffield, so she can’t really work in the same way as Raymond in this scenario. And finally, Ms. Montague had an actual tangible body after death, where as Raymond, assuming he only truly died after Ivo and Edwin arrived, did not as far as I am aware. So the idea of Agnes also truly dying due to Ivo and Edwin’s actions seems a bit far fetched to me. So, I’m still sticking with my original theory here. That theory is that Agnes Montague is a descendant of the Agnes on Hill Top Road, who was given Raymond’s hand, and died on the same day Ivo tore down the tree for mysterious reasons. And…that’s about it! In short, Raymond and Agnes were quietly beefing with each other for eight years, give or take, Agnes burnt down Hill Top Road, killing Raymond and stealing his hand, left behind two eldritch gods, a creepy tree and Raymond’s ghost, said ghost was dealt with when Ivo Lensik and Edwin Burroughs visited the dilapidated house, and Agnes Montague, a descendant of Hill Top Agnes, hung herself on that same day with Raymond’s hand on her waist. This is…extremely bold of me to make. I only do this because much like Micheal, Hill Top Road is something that is very clearly important with tons of connections to other things, but is also extremely difficult to rationalize at the moment. So…I’m just going to take whatever headcanons I have on Hill Top as fact when writing these until further notice, and then use those headcanons to craft theories that’ll probably end up being wrong. Overall, there is still a lot to learn and a lot of questions to be answered. Like, what’s Raymond’s history? What’s his motivations? What’s Agnes’ history and her motivations? What happened when Ronald left? What is up with the GOD. FORSAKEN. TREE?! All of this is very interesting and I’m very excited, but also terrified of uncovering the truth behind this creepy house and its creepy residents. …But do you want to know what the funny things is. We’re STILL. NOT. DONE. Because there is one last thing. One thing that I have neglected to mention. The thing that from now on will haunt my every waking moment until death. The fearsome, gruesome, UTTERLY TERRIFYING…

tabel :-)

Let me just start off by saying that: I WAS SO FUCKING RIGHT!!! One of if not my single oldest standing theory I’ve had while listening was that the box underneath the tree was the missing piece of the table, and finally, after FIFTY-ONE episodes of waiting for the answer, I FINALLY HAVE IT CONFIRMED. THAT IS SO FUCKING GRATIFYING YOU HAVE NO IDEA. Part of why I love this episode is because it really makes it feel like I’ve gotten to a point where so much is starting to come together, and that tiny little reveal was just the icing on the cake for me. But enough gloating…this stupid piece of wood. WHY MUST YOU HAUNT EVERY LITTLE CREVICE I TRY TO HIDE IN YOU SICK FREAK?! So…this is an interesting episode in regards to the table, in that it is the only one to have it, while also not featuring the impersonator. Now, I can think of a few reasons for this. You see, Not!Sasha described the pattern on the table as a web, which I do believe now due to Raymond’s powers, but there’s also a lot that suggests she said that because the table has trapped her, she must go wherever it goes. So, it’s possible that at this point in time she just…wasn’t bound to it. However, it’s worth noting that in all statements that feature the impersonator, the box is missing from the center. So maybe the impersonator was inside the table, but due to the presence of the box, its bindings were even stronger than usual, to the point where it couldn’t even take anyone. And as for the final potential theory, which is COMPLETE crack; I just think it would be kind of cool if maybe the impersonator was like…the souls of all of the children being used as egg sacks. Like they all got sucked into the table, and start taking over other people’s lives in order to get their own ones back. There’s like…a two percent chance that this is the case but I thought it was an interesting idea. Ultimately, all this really does is make the timeline more confusing…and also makes me think the impersonator doesn’t have a good relationship with spiders. And speaking of which, I feel like it’s worth mentioning how Raymond utilizes the table himself. I think his having everyone gather around it on Sundays was basically his way of keeping control over them, and that maybe the table was what gave him this ability in the first place. Since it’s capable of binding the impersonator on its own, maybe he learned how to harness its power and use it on the children. It’s also pretty clear that the apple in the box is what ultimately caused all of those kids to die and become egg sacks…but given how Ivo destroyed the thing I don’t know if we have to worry about that anymore. But I think the biggest takeaway from all of this is that the table is a weapon. It can be used for good purposes like binding the impersonator (which has backfired multiple times but like…it’s better than just letting it run rampant), but can also be used for sinister purposes like mind control. And given how it’s in the institute as we speak…well, I can only hope that it’ll be used for good going forward. But…UGH there’s so much that its presence here opens up! Like, how do Breekon and Hope fit into all of this? At what point did they bring the table to Graham Folger and then the institute? How many other people was it brought to, if at all. Why was the box separated from it? And why didn’t Jon mention it post-statement?! I….SSTFYGFTUUJGREEERTTYYUUIIUIKJFEWWERYUKKKLL!!!!

Well…that was certainly an episode of The Magnus Archives, a podcast distributed by Rusty Quill, and licensed under a Creative Commons attribution non-commercial share alike 4.0 international license. There is a LOT that I did not touch on in this episode, and probably a bajillion things that haven’t even occurred to me. Hopefully though, I’ll touch on those in the future when they’re appropriate to bring up. And like I said, Hill Top Road is like another Micheal to me (oh god…the table…and the fractals with Ivo’s dad OH NO) with how it just feels like it connects to EVERYTHING. The history of this house, Raymond, Agnes and just…everything that surrounds it is so mystifying to me. I feel as if I’m staring into the face of an endless void as we speak, and I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not. Hopefully I will get answers regarding this house soon, but for now…uuuuggghhhh someone save me before I have to give in and become a Jon kinnie. Oh, and speaking of Jon, what about the post-statement and supplemental? Well, we learn that for whatever reason, information regarding Hill Top Road has been largely lost or damaged, which is…concerning. I get the feeling that further information on this house must be…pretty heavy stuff if it’s all been destroyed. Jon also mentions Martin’s fondness for spiders here, which we already knew about but…it’s a bit more strange to me nowadays. I don’t want to be too suspicious of him, especially after he delivered the most legendary plot twist of all time, but I still find it to be an interesting little quirk of his. Lastly, we learn in the supplemental that everyone’s avoiding Jon. And while I do feel bad for him, truly…yeah no shit. I mean I’m sorry sweetheart but you’re not exactly being subtle in your investigations, you shouldn’t be all that surprised by this. …oh dear god. I reach the mid season finale tomorrow…please just be somewhat digestible….

Supplemental: oooooohhhh spooky

- Episode 60, The Observer Effect🪞

Statement of Rosa Meyer, concerning a persistent feeling of being watched.

Well…here it is. The mid-season finale of Season 2. Now, while this episode isn’t quite as grand and shocking to me as Desecrated Host, it is a very, VERY intriguing one. The statement is one of, if not the shortest one yet, which is fair as it needs to make room for the fairly lengthy supplemental, but it does seemingly help to further verify a few of my theories, brings up some interesting new ideas, has some VERY a interesting implications on a thematic level, and it definitely feels like it’s pushing the story into…I guess, another phase or something like that. While I think that this is a solid way to end off the first half of the season, I might not have as much to say about the plot of the statement as I do for some others, as while it is definitely very intriguing, it doesn’t have nearly as many shocking revelations as an episode like the last one for example, just adds to some things that were already implied or suspected. But that’s absolutely fine! Hell, I think I needed something to take my mind off of piecing together Hill Top Road lore, so this is more than welcome. But enough preamble, let’s get into the episode that was…oddly personal to me, but like…personal in a really weird way…yeah…

So, I kind of just want to start off by answering why this episode was so…personal to me. Because it’s really weird. It’s not personal in the same way episodes like Lost in the Crowd or Personal Space are, as while this episode did scare me quite a bit, it wasn’t on a deep, psychologically personal level. No, the reason it’s personal is just a lot more simple. It’s personal because not only do I live in Norwich, (which isn’t that big of a deal, I mean it was bound to show up in tma eventually)…but my dad edits for BBC Look East. …The same show Rosa Meyers, the protagonist of this episode, presented for. So like, this episode doesn’t affect me that deeply, but it just felt…WEIRDLY targeted by how well it lined up with a notable part of my family and I’s lives, and that’s already gained this episode a special place in my heart. Ok, that’s enough of revealing personal details that’ll hopefully not bite me in the ass during future job applications. What about the actual plot of the statement? Starting off, can I get a YIPPEE for our FOURTH cold opening in a row?! HOORAY FOR TRAUMA!!! The whole opening segment…is just so incredibly well performed on Jonny’s part. He always does a great job portraying statement givers in distress, but honestly, this single scene might just be the second best example of this after, like, all of Hive. He REALLY sold how distressed Rosa was when giving this statement, and I fully believed that she was spiraling and breaking down as she wrote it. I’m also really happy that the episode allows this whole breakdown to take up a decent amount of time, as not only does it hint at Rosa being a…somewhat unusual statement giver, but it also helps to drive home what I believe is the main point of the episode, although I’ll get into that later. Anyways, the opening is great, and honestly managed to tap into my own fears of being watched with how visceral the voice acting was. Going forward, we learn about how Rosa gained this feeling after doing inventory for her deceased brother’s estate. And based on the way she described his stroke, as well as what he was involved with…I mean yeah I doubt he died normally. The man was clearly digging very deep into things he probably shouldn’t have, so I think that “stroke” was actually something much more sinister. Oddly enough, his death reminds me of that of Ivo’s father in Episode 8, and Paul McKenzie in Episode 27, both of whom died in seemingly normal ways that had much more sinister undertones. I was also a little bit unnerved by her sibling-rivalry comments on Christopher, which I’m 99% sure doesn’t mean anything, but…Lost Johns’ Cave did things to me so….yeah. Anyways, we also learn here that Christopher Meyers was doing research into ancient religious artifacts, which is obviously…a very interesting thing to mention given the presence of cults and artifacts throughout the podcast. He even wrote about vampires at one point too… This weirdness is backed up later when we learn that he was doing research into “outer cults” and their practices, which I can only assume refers to things like The Divine Host, The Cult of Asag, The Other Circus and more. All of it seems to further suggest that the driving force behind this plot is a war between ✨the horrors✨. It’s all very peculiar, and given his mysterious death…as well as the fact we learn he was consulting with The Magnus Institute for unknown reasons, I definitely think that Christopher Meyer will hold some significance later. This statement was given in 1972, meaning that not even James Wright, Elias’ predecessor, would’ve been in charge at this point, and it’s very possible that Gertrude wasn’t either. So I assume it’ll be fairly hard to dig up information on Christopher…but it’s interesting nonetheless.

Anyways, going back to Rosa, it’s here that she opens one of Christopher’s boxes, and finds the note and mirror that lead to her being watched and gaining extreme paranoia. (By the way, I learned after listening that the title of the episode refers to a phenomenon where you alter the behavior/state of whatever you see, simply by just observing it. Just thought that was pretty cool.) Admittedly, I’m not all that concerned about the note and the mirror in terms of what they could do. The mirror’s shattered now, and either the note can’t act without the mirror or is just kind of creepy, so I’m more concerned about where exactly Christopher even got it…and what it might’ve done to him. Breekon, Hope and Mikaele Salesa obviously have a reputation of handing out creepy artifacts…but I’m more concerned by the possibility he got it from The Magnus Institute itself. And unfortunately…I think that might be the case. You see, this mirror and Rosa’s following experiences have to be tied to the eye horror, because what else it going to be? This horror has always stuck out to me because of how little it seems to show up compared to other ones…but maybe that’s by design. This thing is an observer, a spectator by nature, so it naturally doesn’t get involved all that much, unless someone directly triggers it to, or it’s being…carried around by someone like Gerard. And I think that nature is why it connects to The Magnus Institute, why it likely makes its home there, because the institute is the means through which we are told these stories. Most of the people who are working there don’t directly connect back to the statements themselves (at least as far as we know and with the exception of Not!Sasha), so they are therefore also just outsiders who observe the story, collecting knowledge but not really trying to get too involved. So if we have this spectator being that usually doesn’t get involved unless someone walks directly into its domain…well, where else would Christopher have gotten that mirror? It lines up pretty nicely with Crusader as well, since Walter Heller was haunted by what was seemingly the same being after stumbling into an older archive. So yeah…while the mirror itself doesn’t scare me much, the circumstances behind it definitely do. Following Rosa’s encounter with the mirror, she ends up dealing with extreme paranoia and loses her job, eventually bringing her to giving her statement, in hopes of learning more about what’s happening to her, and her brother’s involvement, ending the story. Now while this episode definitely provides some intrigue here and there, especially regarding the eye horror…it is still pretty short and simple. Not a bad thing at all, I still thought it was very solid and chilling, but outside of connections to the eyes, which are clearly VERY important…it doesn’t seem as grandiose as the halfway point of Season 1. However, I still think it works for one reason, that being how Rosa parallels, and potentially foreshadows Jon.

Throughout this episode, there was just…a lot of really weird similarities between Jon and Rosa that really scared me, maybe even more than anything confirmed in the statement itself. The most obvious similarity between them is their sheer amounts of paranoia, which is at the very least partially stemmed from the fact that they are both being watched, likely by the exact same thing. …This unknown observer genuinely terrifies me with how mysterious they are. They both have gotten increasingly paranoid, doing whatever they can to get answers on the things that haunt them, start mistrusting people or things in their job that were once familiar to them (which makes Elias stating they don’t want to fire him VERY upsetting), and it’s gotten to the point where both of them have caused some level of harm to others. These parallels might not mean much, outside of the obvious connections it provides between Jon and the thing that watched Rosa 24/7, but I think it’s what makes this ultimately work really well as a mid-season finale. We’ve witnessed Jon get progressively more and more unhinged as the season goes on, going as far as to stalk his coworkers, suspect them of murder, and break into Gertrude’s flat, and these parallels, combined with the supplemental which I’ll get to later, really do drive home how far the listener has come, and it feels like a nice way to end the first half. But…there is one thing about these parallels that worries me more than anything else. You see, Rosa apparently murdered a delivery van driver named Danilo Costich, who was seemingly delivering stationary to the institute, threw out the stationary, and replaced it with petrol before stealing the truck. Not only is this very reminiscent of Gertrude’s actions in Crusader (which kind of creates a parallel triangle between Rosa, her and Jon)but it’s clearly meant to tell us that Rosa had plans of blowing up The Magnus Institute, likely due to the fact she felt more watched in the institute than anywhere else, and figured her observer was in there. This is already worrying enough on its own…but when you consider how her story seems to parallel Jon….it makes me really worried that he’ll end up doing something very very stupid sooner rather than later, something that may hurt his colleagues. And there’s one last thing that bothered me. Despite how similar Rosa’s situation was to his…Jon didn’t bother to even draw any attention to that, even though his voice was a little bit shakier than usual. This has been a weird pattern of his recently, one very evident in cases like him neglecting to mention the table in Hill Top Road. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t feel like it’s unintentional, I think it’s a case where Jon, while not exactly in denial like he was in Season 1, is just trying not to draw attention to the things that affect him directly, in order to keep what little sanity he has left. …All in all I’m very scared for him. So…yeah. That’s The Observer Effect. This is a very intriguing episode, it’s short and sweet, but it’s brought me back to some ideas I’ve neglected in the past, and is absolutely one of the most thematically rich episodes for me so far. It’s really making me think about this anonymous watcher…how it feels like everyone in the institute is its puppet. Well, hopefully the second half of the season will give some big answers, but I’ll just have to wait and see in the meantime.

Look…I know it’s a unfortunate situation. I know it’s a result of Jon falling so deep into paranoia and insanity that he’s hurting both himself and the people around him. I know that it really hurts to see that he’s fallen this far, and that his relationships with people who may have once been his friends have fallen apart this much, to the point where he can’t trust them and they can’t trust him. I understand it’s a terrible result of trauma and that we hate to see everyone write off his paranoia as folly when there is at least one eldritch monster among them. But…if I’m being honest…thank GOD they finally gave him an intervention. Like HOLY SHIT this was long overdue. So yeah, as much as this supplemental did kind of hurt to listen to…it’s probably for the best that it happened in the first place. But on top of that, it comes with some pretty interesting revelations that’ll likely change the course of the season from here on out. Starting off, I’m absolutely insane about how Jon recorded the intervention that was regarding him recording things. That is…so uniquely him. I’m also insane about how despite everything that’s happened…Martin was still decently nice to him. Just…can someone please give him all of the riches in the world? Admittedly, this intervention does really show how damaged Jon’s relationships with everyone else have become, but Martin’s behavior here at least gives me hope that they’ll be able to get on amicable terms in the future. (maybe even…kiss…) I also really enjoyed the part where Jon mentioned monsters being out there, and cuts himself off before suggesting any of them might be one…oh god that hurts considering Not!Sasha but it’s so good. Oh yeah, and Not!Sasha continues to be a dirty little liar in the worst ways possible. Don’t get me wrong, I think she’s kind of a vibe, but…”we care about you Jon” and “let’s have no more of this paranoia” made me want to punch her so badly you have no idea. …I kind of hate the fact that I’m getting used to her being around. All in all it’s just a really unfortunate but extremely well written scene. Even though we don’t get to see much of the archival assistants and Elias in Season 1 overall, you can really tell how much things have worsened after Jane showed up, and…it hurts. I hope that Jon will be able to repair his relationships with everyone, but logically speaking I really don’t know if that’s going to happen anytime soon. …There is one last thing, however, that I find very intriguing. That is obviously how Elias gave Jon the CCTV footage of the week Gertrude died. This…seemingly proves that Gertrude was not murdered by anyone in the archives, and Jon starts suspecting that she was murdered by whatever is in the tunnels. Now, I could honestly see this as a red herring. After all, I’ve suspected Elias ever since the cause of death was revealed, and he was the guy who gave Jon the footage, so for all we know he could be obscuring things…but I’m honestly not all that sure. The being in the tunnels is a…complete mystery as of now, like I genuinely have no idea who or what it might be, nor do I know who’s apparently sneaking in when Jon isn’t looking. (My best guess is Not!Sasha but part of me thinks it could be Tim since he was the first person to find them.) In all honesty, I’m now open to multiple interpretations. I don’t feel like I can be fully on board with this theory of Jon’s until we learn more about the tunnels, but I am definitely a lot more open to the idea of the killer being someone outside the institute now. I also found it interesting how Gertrude was described as constantly going in and out, looking frantic. After he broke into her flat, I’ve come to the conclusion that Jon and Gertrude were more similar than he would like to admit, so I definitely think she was dealing with her own paranoia sometime before death, and this nearly confirms it for me. It’s also interesting how there aren’t any cameras in the archives…despite that being the room where all of Gertrude’s blood was found…hm…also when is Jon going to find her laptop?

Overall…this feels like a pretty substantial change. It doesn’t reveal much new information…but it feels like it’s sort of changed the direction of the story. I suspect that in the second half of the season, we’ll get more information on the tunnels, Jon will turn away from suspecting his employees…a bit, (which is concerning given the existence of Not!Sasha but…I digress…) and he’ll probably start digging in other directions to find Gertrude’s killer. I think we’ll get more insight into the members of the archival team going forward, and hopefully, there’ll be some big answers around the time of the finale. But, only time will tell. In conclusion, I thought this was a very satisfying mid-season finale. It’s different from what I was expecting, but I think it serves as a nice way to segue from one half to another, and it definitely pushes the story in new directions. But…I’m more concerned for Jon than ever holy shit…

Supplemental: I just recently had a thought regarding Not!Sasha and the table. For a long time, I’ve assumed that the table, and by extension the spiders, are like her captor, and while I do still think that makes the most sense…I did think of a potential alternative. You see, I’ve compared her to the anatomy students quite a bit, and the anatomy students have a lot of apple symbolism…which might be relevant given the presence of the apple in Hill Top Road. I still think she has more connections to The Anglerfish than anything else, and that the table is her enemy…but it’s interesting food for thought regardless.

OH MY GOD I’M FINALLY FINISHED. Wow…that was…excruciatingly long. Like, it was fun, I’m very proud of the work I’ve put in but LORD ALMIGHTY. So yeah…I’ve somehow reached the halfway point of The Magnus Archives Season 2! It’s…genuinely kind of insane to me that not only have I made it this far…but that I’m in the mental state I am because of it. Like, I knew this was going to be my new big thing as soon as I listened to Do Not Open, but…WOW. This has absolutely taken over my life and brain, and…it’s just…HOW DID I GET FROM A CREEPY GUY ASKING FOR A CIGARETTE TO…ALL OF THIS?! AND WHY AM I TALKING THIS MUCH ABOUT IT?! Overall…I am simultaneously anticipating and dreading what comes next. This season has already been significantly more packed with insane shit than all of Season 1, so I am NOT PREPARED for whatever comes out of it in this next half. Anyways, thank you so much for making it to the end, you have no idea how much it means to me, and I hope you’ll be around for the next post, where I’ll be covering episodes 61-70! Bye! :)

Supplemental Supplemental: Ok there is actually one last thing that popped into my head just now. I’ve taken some time to dwell on it since Still Life, and I’ve come to the conclusion that if The Anglerfish isn’t directly worshipped by The Other Circus, then it’s probably just a smaller branch of whatever it does worship. I think I just needed to stop being set on the idea of The Anglerfish being one of the big bads, because as mysterious and inscrutable as it is, it is entirely possible that it’s a lesser monster more on the level of…vampires or something. So, here is my current list of ✨the horrors✨, updated for Season 2B, now with some potential servants listed as well!

- The Flesh Hive (6, 22, 26, 32, 39, 40, 45, 55)

Servants Include: Jane Prentiss, John Amherst

- The Vast (4, 21, 46, 51, 57?)

Servants Include: Mike Crew, The Fairchilds

- The Piper (7, 42?)

Servants Include: Maybe Alfred Grifter?

- Asag (8, 12, 19, 20, 37, 43, 59)

Servants Include: Diego Molina, Arthur Nolan, Agnes

- The Spiders (8, 16, 19, 20, 38, 59)

Servants Include: Raymond Fielding

- The Darkness (9, 25, 52, 57?)

Servants Include: The Divine Host…In General…

- The Observer (12, 20, 23, 53, 60)

Servants Include: Gerard Keay, Potentially all of The Keays, The Alexandrian Archivist, Potentially the entire Archival Team?

- Isolation Thing (13, 33, 57)

Servants Include: The Lukas Family…In General…

- Meat and Bones (14, 17, 18, 30, 49, 58)

Servants Include: Angela, Jared Hopworth, Tom Haan, Eustace Wick

- Compression (15, 41, 50)

Servants Include: George Gilbert Scott, The Governor, Maybe Laura Popham, Maybe whatever is in the tunnels

- The Anglerfish (or something close to it) (1, 24, 28, 44, 54)

Servants Include: The Other Circus, Breekon & Hope, Sarah Baldwin, Daniel Rawlings

- Micheal (8, 26, 47)

Servants Include: …Himself? idk (:/)

- The Master of The Reapers (29)

Servants Include: The Reapers…duh…

And then there’s probably something else I’m missing. Or maybe not idk. Ok, goodbye for real now! :)

[ceruleanwhore]

So I’ve seen a lot of posts talking about the potential for canon Ted x Trent in the finale, but there’s an angle or two I haven’t seen examined yet that I’d like to discuss here. What I am referring to is mainly why the writers chose to have Trent be the one to support Colin through his arc, coming out and everything, instead of using Keeley, who is canonically bi and was in a sapphic relationship during Colin’s arc. They didn’t need to have another character come out and everything for the sake of supporting Colin through his arc, and yet they chose to do so anyway, and I do think it’s important that they chose Trent specifically. I think it’s also important to acknowledge how limited lgbtq rep has been in media and how already, just by having Keeley and Colin be written as they are, this show has gone far beyond most others. Likewise, it should be acknowledged how having that role in Colin’s arc would have been genuinely very good for Keeley’s own character arc and how well it could have tied into some aspects of her relationship with Jack, so it’s not as though using her for that would’ve just been a cheap cop-out. The fact that they didn’t do that indicates to me that they have something specific and even better in mind.

When you keep that in mind, suddenly the signs are everywhere that this could actually, genuinely happen in canon - Trent’s red string bracelet, Ted’s comment about Sleepless in Seattle, Trent meeting Ted’s mom, etc. My whole thing with this pairing is that, when I look at it, especially in s3, there’s so much there that I genuinely believe they’d already be snogging if it was hetero and in a different show. In this context, I can only see Trent coming out and Ted “I was a straight man” Lasso making that movie reference as our indication that they bat for the other team, as it were, and yes, this can be something other than friendship.

The other thing I would add is that in the mom episode we get open acknowledgment that Ted’s biggest problem is how he runs around helping others but can’t accept help from anyone else for himself. I would then point out that the only time he’s received the same huge, self-sacrificial type of help he gave Beard with prison and everything is what he got from Trent Crimm revealing an anonymous source and then leaving his entire career to show his support and respect of Ted. Yes, a lot of the others around him have supported and helped Ted in different ways but I think it’s huge that Trent is the only one who’s done so on that level. I would also add that Trent has supported Ted multiple times while being one of the only characters to do so without ever acting against him. Beard stole his car, Nate turned on him, Rebecca was plotting against him and using Leslie to do so, etc., and yet Trent from the beginning was skeptical at most and never really acted against Ted. Beyond that, I also think that the first article Trent wrote about Ted in s1 is hugely indicative of Trent’s potential compatibility with Ted.

For one thing, Ted talked quite a bit in s1 about curiosity and went on that whole speech with Rupert in the darts game about how he values it but how so few people are genuinely curious - but Trent is. Trent shows up to write about Ted, skeptical but curious enough to pay close attention and allow his view of this other man to shift and to not be clouded by biases. I think the truth element is also huge - Ted’s ex wifey couldn’t accept his communication style and got an override from their therapist to force Ted to be outwardly truthful in a way he wasn’t comfortable with, and yet Trent clearly demonstrates his ability to accurately discern the truth from Ted without ever pushing him in such a way. Trent over and over again respects boundaries, never pushes people to share beyond what they’re comfortable with, and still gleans the truth from what he does see and hear, which is exactly what Ted needs.

Lastly, I’m not here to go off ragging on tedbecca and tbh I wouldn’t be mad if it did happen, but I want to talk about why I just don’t see it happening in canon real quick. First and foremost is that she’s the only other character than Ted’s ex (is her name Michelle? I genuinely can’t remember and that’s the only reason why I’m not using it) who uses ‘Oklahoma’ with him, and I don’t actually see that as a good thing. This is especially the case ever since it came out that Michelle(?) is now dating the therapist she and Ted saw who had them start using that in the first place, since that new relationship calls all the therapy she and Ted did into question.

Also, it’s not just that Rebecca used to be plotting against Ted, it’s that from s1 e1 on she’s been using him in one way or another to get back at or one up Rupert. Whether it’s working against him in s1 or then really trying to get him to win, especially with that one game against West Ham in s3, she’s just continually trying to use Ted as a tool against another man. What’s more damning is that when she does start to show interest in men who are not Rupert, it’s never Ted- Ted’s just there to bring her biscuits and engage in occasional attempts at girl talk, which really fits into the trope of a token gay best friend. I think they do have a good, solid relationship and, like I said, I won’t be mad if they do end up together, but I don’t see them as being set up to be in a romantic relationship.

But yeah, I think that’s all for now lol

[closedrop]

So far I am 25 hours into Crisis Core and learned many things

(Crisis Core spoilers and theories ahead)

- Genesis has a Bible (most likely related to LOVELESS and his theories) and I joined his fan club

- Sephiroth has a fan club with “images that your average Sephiroth fan could never ever dream of seeing” apparently which is a bit worrying but I am also a Sephiroth fan club member so

- Tseng knows Aerith somehow? Willing to bet this is either related to her having been in I think Shinra facilities for a while. Orrrr something love related(?)

- Cid is in space training :) (I love Cid.)

- Cissnei is a character, don’t know much about her but she’s there and I don’t THINK she’s in the original FFVII but if she is she’s hidden because I dragged Cloud around on SO MANY side quests. (Cissnei your chances of living do not look good in the future I’m not gonna lie)

- I believe Gongaga is still intact and hasn’t yet been destroyed by theeee Mako Reactor I think it was sooo that’s probably gonna be an important plot point if that happens

- At least two of the SOLDIERS are gay for Zack or at least find him attractive in some way (which if they are, good for them, good for them)

- The fact that once you’re in the science dept. you can’t leave because they deal with too much sensitive information, that’s a really nice detail and I really love it. I learned that a few days ago I think and I really appreciate that because it makes Hollander’s stuff make more sense I guess from what little I do know

- I lied about Sephiroth he’s not the comedy character it’s Genesis, my man just shows up, spouts poetry(It’s always LOVELESS) and then dips. “My friend, will you fly away now. To a world that abhors you and I 🤓” (I’m sorry Genny ily I’m in your fan club 😞)

- Apparently nobody likes Angeal because from what I saw there was one person in his fan club and it’s getting shut down because she’s too depressed to do anything about it (unless Zack intervenes, which can’t be possible anymore because I missed that chance, sorry Angie 😞)

- There’s a lot of definitely not relevant small details(lie) Like Zack’s whatever limit break that he uses when you haven’t gotten the character’s image in the DMW yet. It’s just cross slash, which is Cloud’s 2nd limit break in the original FFVII (I can’t say anything about the new one since I haven’t played it yet- but yeah) Another one being Aerith’s bow, since Zack buys it. (I’m sure there’s more I can’t think of right now but yeah)

- Zack is 6’1” and his hobby is squats apparently which makes sense but I figured he’d more of a casual baking kind of guy. (Though he’d also be the kind of guy to burn like Kraft Mac n cheese so I don’t know if I’d trust him in the kitchen ever-)

- Zack got doxed lol (and Yuffie got his address)

- Zack the puppy.

- Wutai spies are very bad at being spies

- Every child is a con artist (except for that one that one time)

- Zack, master treasure hunter (Me because I have spent most of my time doing just missions and side quests-)

[inkblackorchid]

Hi! How do you feel about the Crashtown mini-arc?

Ahhh, Crashtown. Honestly, I’m extremely in two minds about the arc. See, here’s the thing. When I watch it, it’s a great deal of fun. It’s a very self-contained little story that has all the necessary setup and payoff built into itself, and the cowboy aesthetics in Crashtown’s unique setting, while technically still being part of 5Ds’ largely futuristic canon, are absolutely hilarious. Not to speak of the excellent dramatics, what with Kiryu being in his depressed bitch era and needing the Power of Friendship to remember why it’s nice to be alive. So, in isolation, I find Crashtown very funny and its self-contained story compelling.

However, sometimes, I get a little frustrated knowing how many episodes this arc takes up, because where the larger narrative is concerned, Crashtown accomplishes… Well, nothing, unfortunately. It doesn’t interact with the main plot in any way, doesn’t develop Yusei’s character in a particular way (because we already knew he’s a special kind of loyal-as-a-dog-devoted when it comes to Kiryu; if anything, Crashtown only shows us that he’s also a little more gullible than usual when Kiryu gets brought up), and while it does give Kiryu meaningful character progression, he’s sadly never relevant again after this point in the show (literally the only two times he shows up after this point is during the flashback of everyone cheering Yusei on during his duel with Z-ONE and in the epilogue as he loses to Jack). Worse yet, the whole arc begs the question of why only Kiryu and no other dark signer got this kind of tying-up-loose-ends treatment. (The answer, I believe, is that he’s specifically the dark signer who has the strongest ties to Yusei in particular, which awards him special treatment. That does nothing to justify why Carly, who I’d go as far as saying is at least equally important to Jack as Kiryu is to Yusei, doesn’t get anything like this, though, and is instead sidelined because she has amnesia. You know. Amnesia. Everyone’s favourite trope. Which Kiryu, curiously, also doesn’t have.) And considering how often I lament about the things I wish 5Ds canon had spent more time on, I don’t think it comes as a surprise that it leaves a slight, bitter aftertaste in my mouth that an arc like Crashtown that adds nothing to the larger plot or any character other than Kiryu gets so many episodes while many things I wish the show had addressed don’t get a single one.

So, Crashtown’s kind of a mixed bag for me. I think the best way to sum it up would be this: If you handed me the reins for a full 5Ds rewrite, one of two things would happen. Either the show would gain another twenty or so episodes where I’d try to give all the other dark signers similar treatment as Kiryu in Crashtown, developing both them and the main cast members they interact with more (and also try to make them at least show up one more time before the Ark Cradle arc, even if only to cheer Team 5Ds on during the WRGP), or Crashtown would be left on the cutting room floor entirely, because if the only way to improve the main cast and plot were to find time for all the necessary adjustments within the exact same episode count we already have, Crashtown (and all of the pre-WRGP arc’s pure filler episodes) would be the first thing to go.

Don’t get me wrong, the yeehaw arc has excellent aesthetics, excellent dramatics, and is great fun every time I rewatch it, so I don’t fault anyone for loving it to bits, I absolutely get it. My inner overanalyst/canon rewriter just can’t unsee how many episodes it took up that were desperately needed for other stuff sometimes.

[cassberry]

(Some links if you want to watch 3rd Life or Last Life first! EDIT: And here is Limited Life! )

Welcome one and all to the life series soulmate AU season! I seem to have got into the habit of making a new one of these whenever the new season is literally just around the corner. And I use them as an excuse each time to re-watch the life series and to ramble about it lmao

Now thankfully the core mechanic this season of soulmates made collating this guide 1000% easier then 3rd or Last Life. With a few exceptions, soulmates tended to stay side-by-side the whole session. Now don't get me wrong although some perspectives can be interchangeable, they are all a great watch! I have just put the POV I believe to show more of whats happening on the server or an incredibly important moment.

WARNING: Once again an incredibly long read more where I expound at length why I chose these specific POV's lol enjoy!

SESSION ONE

Grian - I'm keeping with tradition and recommending Grian first because in all honesty his first episode is a fantastic watch. Between the reveal of who his soulmate is and various shenanigans, this episode was so much fun.

Cleo or Scott - Cleo and Scott probably see most of the server trying to find their soulmates so either of these POV's are fantastic.

Pearl - Pearl bounces between groups for quite a bit of this session, so she's great to get a good look at multiple dynamics. However, its the last 5 or so minutes of her episode that really set in motion some of the leading conflicts of the season that you don't want to miss.

Etho - Just a fun episode honestly! His soulmate reveal with Joel is so freaking funny and I called it my 3rd Life post that when Etho and Joel team up, they just become little gremlins lmao I think they spend half the episode giggling.

SESSION TWO

Impulse - The Real Housewives of the Mid-Century Modern Home is a totally true and totally real show that happened during Impulse and Bdubs episodes this week. They are happily married and will prove that fact by breaking up every other couple on the server.

Scar - With a combination of swindling and major arson, Scar really does do it all this session.

Scott - The interpersonal drama this season is amazing and Scott being right in the middle of it makes this POV a great watch.

Tango - Absolutely not related to another POV this session, but making the Ranch out of wood was probably not a good idea in the long run.

SESSION THREE

Big B - The drama between Big B and Ren this session is so juicy. Between secret soulmates, Scott testing their relationship and [SPOILERS] becoming the first reds on the server, I don't know how they survived as long as they did.

Jimmy - Along with his soulmate, Jimmy and Tango welcome a beautiful baby boy into the world this week and probably cause the most chaos I've ever seen in the life series.

Martyn - Man, he is really bad at maths.

Pearl - Being the lone wolf (heh) of the season, her POV is great to get an outside view on events.

SESSION FOUR

Joel - I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard at the beginning of an episode before. Also fishing rods are to OP, mojang needs to nerf them before they claim even more lives lol 

Cleo - So much happens this episode, its ridiculous. But Cleo has a good blend of chaos and calm.

Ren - The most elaborate plot to kill others never seems to be as good as just a weapon in the end. 

Martyn - As Martyn is inviting everyone to a pool party, he probably sees most of the server, so he is great perspective to see what everyone is up to.

BONUS: watch Scar’s POV around 26:10 for the ultimate badass moment.

SESSION FIVE

Scar - Scar goes through it this week. I really can’t say much more without major spoilers but oh boy, this is an exciting POV.

Etho - The boat boys have wayyyy to much fun being red this session.

Jimmy - At this point I think there is someone out there has a personal grudge against him lol also if you want to see a fandom go nuts over a Ferris Bueller quote, watch the end of Tango's video.

Big B - Just a good solid episode and the ending is actually tragic.

SESSION SIX

Pearl - The most essential POV of the season. Heartbreak! Betrayal! Just general badassery! It's all here and its all amazing!

Bdubs - Gives a good overview of the Red Alliance and the chaos that happens when a group of people have nothing left to do but hunt others down.

Cleo - Watching her and Martyn try and outrun the reds is so incredibly stressful. Watching her turn red is so incredibly satisfying.

Grian - After he kicks the bucket due to... reasons, he sticks around in ghost form for a bit. Also his credits honestly makes me a little emotional.

In Summary...

And that's it! This season was incredibly short due to the shared life mechanic, however it was no less amazing than the others. Can I just say the fan content that came out of this season has just blown me away. It's just all so damn good.

Also I had someone ask why I do it this way rather than just recommending specific POV's to watch all the way through. It's really because I believe the best way to watch a Life season is to binge all the POV's of one session at once, completely break down over the sheer amount of content and then move onto the next week lmao just like as if it was live!

But really, there is something magical about watching multiple perspectives of the same event one after another that just gives the life series its charm. You see everything there is to see and then your anticipation for the next session is super high which just makes the experience so much more exciting. Anyway I hope this helps you on your Double Life adventure!

[temporarilyunstable]

it's a monster of a ppp essay

Finally writing about this film I’ve pretty much obsessed over for months! Hopefully I can put some order into this but in case I ramble you have been warned lol. Spoilers will be discussed. 

I first saw this film in Japan on opening day— prior to that I tried to gather as much information as I could via JP tweets and impressions, especially those of the pre-golden week screening on April 29, then adding more info as soon as spoilers were lifted to increase my understanding. And now a couple of months later, I finally have full context, but really happy that most of the information I got was accurate, and the only details that I had to clear up were related to the more complex elements of the plot, plus the ever-important talk-no-jutsus (tnj) in the film. 

If I were to give this film a score, it’s a 9/10. Prior to this, my fave iteration was case 3, being the ever-economic-just-over-an-hour-but-does-everything-right entry to the series. Maybe it’s my Akane bias but PPP just knocked that one right out of the park. The animation was great (I am not well-versed in this so you won’t hear me talk about it much), even if wonky Arata took me out despite the emotion in the scene. Voice acting, no one does it better than the JP actors, I will not be convinced otherwise. It’s my preference and frankly if you’ve never watched this in sub I do think you missed out. The music was TOP-TIER. I’ve not stopped listening to this OST ever since it came out, blessdt Ennio-Morricone-esque Is this your choice, Akane Tsunemori? track #27 CD2?!!?!??! *INHALE* 

I can’t actually use technical film critic jargon here so in short, I LOVE this film so much. 

A bit of background info from the recent interviews Director Shiotani participated during the roundtables/live stages in JP - the “switching” of the timelines were at the behest of the producers (Fuji TV), including the introduction of new characters, in order to continue the story indefinitely from a TV perspective (link). It was a ballsy move, and in hindsight it paid off, but not without its pitfalls which I will touch on later. PP3/FI was developed during PPSS, and PPP was developed during PP3/FI, so you can imagine the difficulty of making sure the creative team have crossed their t’s and dotted their i’s. That being said, apart from telling the story it wishes to tell, the purpose of this film was to tie the past to the present, and I think that they did it very well. 

My thoughts are still evolving, but interestingly enough, most of my impressions haven’t changed. So I’ll talk about some elements of the plot that interest me, then I’ll go to specific characters, and ofc I’ll talk about the ship (not the Grootslang 😉).

There’s a clear three-parts to this film: up to Saiga’s death, up to Atsushi’s death, and Akane’s career death (if it is to be said, so it is lol). Each part had their pros and cons, but it’s quite a feat managing to squeeze all the information in. There was no dull moment for me.

I think the deaths here (especially of the characters we were supposed to care about)— the manner and speed in which they perished, and at a certain point in the film, all for nothing— were part of the point.

Before I watched this with subs I actually thought that it would be more difficult to understand, but I have to say that the nolan-esque expositions were well executed and nicely placed, for example the talk about possession between Kogami and Shion was a good prep for the audience for when we actually get to hear about how it works from Akira. Also a great way to show both Kogami’s detective skills that have not dulled the slightest, and his and Shion’s closeness(?/familiarity? Call it what you want). Another example is the Mika-team essentially telling the audience what’s about to happen prior to us seeing Sugo get things done in the sky (also I forgot he was just flying a drone and was out of harm’s way ehehe). I would say that the hardest parts to piece together have to do with the elements related to PP3, including the involvement of Bifrost. I’ll touch on this later.  

I’ve talked about Saiga’s death to my friends way before the first trailer ever released. Him not being present in PP3 was the biggest clue, and not that I wanted it to happen, but it was necessary to raise the stakes and make it personal. As a fic writer, admittedly I’ve never been happier to be right 😅. His scenes with Akane and Kogami at the beginning of the film were standouts. I particularly love how Saiga and Akane are so at ease with having a simple conversation— they’re talking about work but he could so easily talk about his doubts regarding Atsushi, for example. I love how he’s the same with Kogami, how he clearly states his allegiance to Akane, and ofc reminding Kogami to apologize (and something else I picked up that I will discuss later). 

I can say that despite the initial ridiculousness of the Divider/possession, the way it was explained was quite convincing to me compared to how they brushed over how Arata’s mentalist skills worked in PP3. Also, there’s kind soul from the JP fandom who attempted to explain how it could probably work irl (link). It’s creepy, if you think about it, and well-documented too. Have a read if you’re interested. 

Action scenes, definitely a strong suit of this film - you just know they can’t help themselves sometimes LOL. Kogami v Akira is definitely the best one (RIP Kogami’s balls hihi), and I’ve said this before but they definitely have perfected Kogami’s animation when it comes to fighting, and he is always the most flawlessly animated, however I think they did Gino really well here too. There’s this other really wonky one where Sugo falls down the escalator and it just looks like he’s a solid object and not a human body asdlfkjaskldfj. Honestly I finally understood the critique that the Sugo drone scenes were definitely way too long (I didn’t notice this bec it was hella entertaining when you don’t have subs plus it was super fun if you watch it in 4dx/mx4d).

Really dropped the ball on the Stronskaya Papers imo. I think, for something that was meant to be so important, the exposition regarding its use was really a lazy excuse. “SEAUn essentially proved its value” ain’t gonna cut it. If this is something so important people choose to kill/die for, then the implications of it should have been shown to the audience, not told. 

I only noticed after the third subbed rewatch, but to me, everyone is being measured against Akane in this film. I will elaborate later.

Sibyl as an AI

Finally, the little complication about using the term "AI" when describing the Sibyl System. When the first impressions of this came out, there were a LOT of dissatisfied JP fans. Until it was described as such in the film, since the system constitutes actual human brains, then the interpretation is that it is human. I’m not sure if this was a general interpretation btw, but since this is the first time the term “AI” was used to describe Sibyl, ofc it rubbed people the wrong way, especially bec it feels like the whole concept of Sibyl was retconned. 

I somewhat agreed with this interpretation— I had always considered the Sibyl System as an independent character in this series, who was meant to be impartial but somehow acts/reacts as a human would— and it's not hard to think so, when you look at the way the system has acted and evolved throughout the show. At times, the system is shown to be curious, greedy, and even cruel. I am ofc talking about them as a whole and not their androids (Kasei, Misako, Chuan Han, Hosorogi, even the dude in Case 2, etc)— individual brains act as human with a CA constitution (so still slightly different from a normal human), that’s clearly shown in the series.

When I read about this through interviews of Director Shiotani, I didn’t quite get the full context as it was used in the film. My initial interpretation was that the system was human, but the mechanisms that make it work (the claws swapping brains supposedly without human intervention, the city/country-wide whole network/surveillance system, the immediate reaction to process a Dominator’s request, etc) were powered by AI. I thought that they used the term AI to update the terminology, since this technology is quickly becoming commonplace irl. Now I've seen PPP with subs and thought a bit more about it, I still somehow think this is the case but also, all things considered, the term AI also makes sense. 

Bear with me as I try to break it down. The Sibyl System is a system that is bound by its raison d'être: the greatest happiness for the greatest number of people (very important: not all). To achieve this, it has taken over control of the lives of its citizens via the Psycho- Pass, a quantified measure of mental states/psychological tendencies and aptitudes— a supposedly objective measure. This includes law enforcement, as the system is able to predict an individual’s tendency to commit crime. We also know that the Sibyl system has auxiliary functions, like planning citizens’ lives or recommending the best option for the individual’s happiness, matchmaking, art/cultural/historical/religious control. Its role is very simple: assign the best possible job that one is most capable of (essentially eliminating non-productivity as a society), and through psycho-pass measurements, maintain/execute (criminal) law and order under the PSB. It can be implied that other non-criminal laws can’t be divorced from Sibyl, since its functions make all these possible within the confines of what Sibyl constitutes as “right” (and is implied,) based on the rule of law. Sorta like a chicken and egg situation, but the law, being at the base of it all. Sibyl came into legal force - it is, first and foremost, lawful.

Applying that to the definition of AI, we could say that at its inception, the law would be Sibyl’s code/algorithm, prior research (be it criminal/non-criminal data/aptitude/psychology/physio etc etc) and eventually its actual application is its data set, and the use of human brains as its processing mechanism. If we review how the system has "acted" so far, it's all consistent with the fulfillment of their purpose, EVEN if exceptions, limitations and anomalies exist. 

A key concept that has been repeated in the show’s run is Sibyl’s “evolution”, which coincides with the same concept of AI “developing/learning automatically”. If I still have your attention, you will probably know that the main driver of Sibyl’s evolution has always been Akane, be it directly (S1, PP movie, PPP), or indirectly (PP2, PP3). This has been introduced from the start, with Sibyl itself acknowledging its imperfection, but insisting on the need to maintain its perceived perception in the interests of a peaceful society. 

What makes it a bit contentious is the fact that the individual brains ARE very obviously still human - so I think that the “the Sibyl System is an AI” really feels off somehow, or at least conceptually feels like it should have been carefully defined rather than left up for interpretation, given what we’ve seen in the series thus far. In any case, here are some references to help you think about it and make your own interpretation.

World Affairs (OffiPro)

Genesis 1-2

Genesis 3-4

Characters - I’m just gonna put this disclaimer, basically if I quote something from the film please just understand that it’s mostly paraphrased. 

Akira

Definitely one of my favorite additions to this massive cast. Not the first one to say it but what a shame (he’s so sexy UwU). He’s probably less complex of a character than Atsushi (oh we’ll get to him), since his motivations are not “heavy” enough for me to believe such a sacrifice. He volunteered to be a double agent, burned his face to prevent identification, took on the mental (physical, actually) load of the chips in his brain and for what? For the greater good? Where did we see that anywhere? It is implied that as an immigrant he’s had his fair share of exposure to wars/conflict - we all know this was the same case with characters like Kei and Maiko, for example, but if we’re simply relying on the context of this film, I got the impression that he was merely doing it for his brother. 

Things I love:

Dropping the machine gun post shootout with Kogami, signaling that he has no intention to go that far (gonna talk about the other side of this coin in a bit)

RECITING THE GREAT ASO on top of that holo cliff *chills* 

In the JP version, his very VERY noticeable voice change when he surrendered to Kogami and Gino

His “please take care of Kei” never fails to make my heart ache T-T AKIRAAAAAAAAAAA

Atsushi (& a bit of Yabuki)

One of the best characters in this film (who no one will invite in their wedding— oh the irony lol). I think that a good baseline from watching PP3/FI really helps appreciate him, though I didn’t actually care much if not for Niki making me notice in PP3 that there are conflicting accounts about him (a malicious one c/ o Obata in her testimony, vs Arata’s POV of him as a good and loving father), plus the more I learned about the complexities of Bifrost the more I got interested in him, too. Atsushi is clearly a morally grey character, and in this film it both comes out of his mouth (as a form of admittance in his speech), and shows in his actions. His speech: "The right choice can be wrong in a different time, that’s because righteousness is relative, but the truth is absolute. What we need is the truth, the means to accept that truth and choose the path where no one gets hurt." is clearly directed at only four people in that room. The speech also served as an admission of his guilt— and once again, the theme “he did what he had to/someone had to do it”.  

There’s a line during his interview with Akane where she says “you don’t make mistakes. Everything you do puts you a step further in your career, as if you’re following a path laid out before you.” When she seems to have hit the right line of questioning, he was clearly about to confess, but alas, it was not to be. I remember reading an interview where Director Shiotani said “he doesn’t get to have it easy” and you know what, ok fine. 

Atsushi and Yabuki’s approach is, in a nutshell, big picture thinking, the end justifies the means. They make difficult decisions, get things done and can’t avoid people from getting hurt. This is also driven home by Yabuki’s words to Frede “ideals are not enough to bring about change”. (He also said something good about needing that kind of power to exact justice and being prepared for the infamy that would result - help me if you remember this was my takeaway from it). To me, they both represent the kind of people who are about to become obsolete in Sibyl society IF it is heading towards the path people like Akane and eventually, Arata, are aiming for (put a pin on that). 

We know that he was a Bifrost Inspector, and interestingly enough, it seems that Yabuki is too since they’re communicating via the terminal we saw Kei use. As is on trend for anything related to Bifrost, you do not see the hands of these guys getting dirty despite all the dirty work they actually do. That said, Akira, Milcia and most likely Saiga, are probably foxes.

Things I love:

I think that he and Tonami, while they must have believed there was no other way at the time, acknowledged that there was no excuse, and as a result are inspired (or in Tonami’s case, persuaded though begrudgingly) to trust the newer generation to do it better than they could. I feel like Atsushi already knew his time was coming the moment the deaths of those he had personal ties with started piling at his door. 

His conversation with Kasei/Sibyl: “we’ve been watching you for a while”, implying Sibyl being complicit in all the dirty work he’s had to do. “Do you believe in the potential of humans?” and the response “of course. this is the reason why we exist” — really rubs the god/religious themes here, handing him the gun that will take his life as their parting gift, as if to say “this is your judgment”. I’m gonna touch on this again with Akane. 

I’m not the first person to say this but with the exception of Yabuki, who was killed, at the end, Milcia, Akira and Atsushi’s acts were extreme, and I’m just not gonna gloss over this, cowardly. Choosing to die instead of living. Choosing to be absent instead of being present (in his brother’s life, in her daughter’s life). Atsushi preached it to his son (“do not dive without a lifeline”) but not only failed to act on his teachings but continued his approach. You could say it was the only choice at the moment, but all their previous choices led them there, and it’s even worse that they got someone else involved and killed, even if that wasn’t their intention. 

HOWEVER, and this is going to be brought up again: someone has to do it, and therein lies the nuance in the other main character in PPP we’ll talk about later.

Saiga

I don’t really have much to add except they made him especially handsome in this film… 😳 And ofc I love that he picked up the lack of people in the building, he really said you can’t hide anything from my keen observation skillz. I loved that he was pretty chill about it too, maybe he was trying to cool down his favorite student 🤗

Things I love:

Akane visited him at 23:41 in the evening, I am assuming on that same day (it’s the time stamp on his laptop, also confirmed by Director Shiotani). I guess the concept of after office hours does not exist bec it looks like they left for Dejima immediately after. 

“People aspire for comfort and find themselves unable to escape it, like me” and Akane immediately saying that’s not the case 🥹

Coffee on the lips. Leaning back on the couch. The toast and the chuckle RIP

“She’s not a saint/bodhisattva”: I’ve understood this to mean that she WILL enforce Kogami if it comes down to, hence he better apologize to her while he can. 

His very meme-able criticism of Kogami before they got on the elevator 

“Well, that was crazy!”

HIM BEING PEAK HANDSOME WHEN HE HAD A KNIFE ON HIS THROAT LIKE?!?! 

The desperation and VERY obvious there is no other way here when Akane’s whole body is about to fall just trying to hang onto him

That they muted Akane’s scream when he fell

That she went straight down to him without so much as looking back at the fighting still happening

That she fixed his body 😭

I’m really gonna miss him. I always used to hc that Akane and Kogami would have a moment with him at some point in the future, calling back to their visit to his house in s1 but alas… we can’t have everything we want, huh? 

Tonami

AHHHH old man, old man. 

My favorite part about Tonami is that they clearly improved on making sure they don’t paint him as an evil guy. They tried to do this with Garcia, but frankly the novel did a better job at making him look more nuanced than the movie did— and that’s saying a lot since like I said, I love case 3. This is probably because they had the benefit of time, of course, and we’re gonna touch on this again later, they spend less time making Kogami look good (i mean, not physically) in this film. 

They were very economic with how they portrayed his character, too. With just that one scene of him and the kid, you immediately empathize and are forced to listen to what he’s actually saying. My favorite scenes of any iteration is the “reckoning”/tnj that Akane has towards the end, basically summarizing the thesis of the story, and the questions it poses to the audience. This film is probably the best at presenting the most nuanced argument of the series so far between two sides. Very simple, very straightforward, and the movie’s prior scenes have done the legwork for the viewer to connect the points each is trying to make, like neat little puzzle pieces that make you go oh.

Things I love:

“Don’t forget you were the ones who made me this way.” (mic drop).

Akio Otsuka’s voice acting, especially when Akane was crawling to grab the Dominator. THE FRUSTRATION IS REAL.

This was pretty much confirmed and I’ll touch on it again later: he was not going to kill Akane (link) . I thought this was up for debate at first, but actually after seeing the subbed version I am convinced this was actually not up for debate due to the following:

It was him talking to Kai when he killed Milcia, he asked “You killed her?” and said “You messed up, Kai” 

We do not actually see him kill unless there is a purpose. Killing the SAD guys to get to Milcia, killing the SAD guys to get to Saiga. He revived Bokamoso because he needed to get the papers (wasn’t convinced that Saiga really didn’t have it, as already established by Saiga a few scenes prior), and was biding their time when he engaged with Frede & Gino after Kai confirmed the papers were not there, probably waiting for Kai to finish with Kogami (“time is up”). Decided the ops team (Ko, Gino, Frede) needed to die after they were exposed and the safety of the General and Raphael were put in jeopardy. 

He shot Akane in the same place he shot Kogami a few scenes prior— this is also why I do not believe this is random, but rather just a means to incapacitate them while he needed to do what he needed to do: possess Kai bec he now knows where the General is and needed him out of there, (unclear whether he knew at the time that Kai had the papers but likely he did since he referred to the memory chip during his first meeting with Akane), and have Akane not bother him while he possesses the peacebreakers in battle).

Shooting Akane again, not fatally wounding her.  

Akane’s line “why don’t you just kill me?”. Like, really, why didn’t he? The link above sheds some light on the creator’s vision on this and it’s delicious, lol. IMO, if he had wanted her dead they’d not have even talked. Very simple.

This is not to justify his actions btw, in fact, Akane even called him out “the same wars you helped perpetrate”, and her lichrally saying “I promise to expose the truth about the peacebreakers, but this doesn’t excuse what you’ve done”. Madame Justice said YOU WILL BE JUDGED BY THE POWER VESTED IN ME AS AN INSPECTOR OF THE PUBLIC SAFETY BUREAU ETC ETC  

He cares about Kai/Akira (the line to Atsushi “so Kai is your pawn, too?” at the helipad, and his concern about the divider overloading and his reaction that Kai is choosing to die). He clearly cares about the peacebreakers, too. Nuance, man. Delicious. 

“You can’t stop what you started here” CHILLS. Definitely reminds me of Kamui’s tnj in S2.

Frede

I have a soft spot for her. She’s clearly more loyal to Yabuki & the MFA than to Saiga, and, judging by her character we’ve seen so far, she’s taking after Yabuki as well 😉

The reason why? #21 in Director Shiotani’s Q&A space last June 15 (link).

So pretty when she was conflicted about not telling Saiga/Kogami about le grand  ̶f̶a̶i̶l̶  plan

I like how she calls Yabuki “boss” 🥹

Fave scene when Kogami calls her out for lying to Saiga LOL, I just love that he can just do that and that she doesn’t even bat an eye, I like that about them. 

Gino

He’s not my fave, but I’ve grown a bit soft on him here I have to admit. Love that they gave his devotion to Akane more context, and that this whole system of trust between them (and the rest of Div 1) is shown. 

He is right, it’s his ego talking (the boat convo). Akane didn’t and isn’t staying/tied to the CID bec of them (Ko & Gino) jeez man. It’s not about YOU. LMFAOOoOOOOooo 

Little Ginomika moment, I loved that. Speaking of…

Mika

“This is no time to be playing politician” sis— did anyone ever tell you that you have an aptitude for it? The whole plan about selling them out if they all die so she could save their asses, then actually coming to their aid when it truly mattered? Does your fave ever?!?!?! 

While she’s probably the one who has one of the best charadevs in the show, I fear a little that she’s starting to become a gag character, ALTHOUGH i’m arguing that she’s clearly still a writer’s fave with the way they give her critical hero moments when it counts (the whole rock star raid at heaven’s leap in PP3, then this “I got it covered” in PPP). I think Mika best displays the balance required to stay (sane) in this job. She’s able to take on what she needs to, and accomplish the role she’s set out to play, and at the end of the day she probably goes home and has a boba, binges netflix and has a good night’s sleep. 

I dunno where I read this - but there are main characters, and there are main side characters. This is Gino and Mika’s fate in the grander story, with their arcs pretty much over since Case 1.  

Finally, the good stuff. If this ain’t much of an overly long essay already.

Kogami

Before I go off, my experience is as follows:

When the first trailer of PPP came out, his words “I have no regrets” were so jarring to me. I didn’t quite understand how that was supposed to add up to the Kogami in my head, the hopeful man who was ready to come home at the end of Case 3, and the guy who said sorry at the end of PPFI. This led me to find some answers by machine translating the PP3/FI novels, and the case 3 novel. 

In a nutshell, I had thought that the ending of case 3 meant that he was going to turn a new leaf and fight for the same justice Akane was (in short, no killing). Guess what? I forgot that he did kill Jackdaw in PPFI, and the novel pretty much confirmed his actions and thoughts around it (aka, he was really going to kill the guy— I mean, he came into the scene guns blazing, you know? AND I FORGOT ABOUT IT (I call this my akane-tinted glasses 😉).

Another line in Akane’s monologue that cemented my reinterpretation of Kogami, and I was immediately reminded of this passage when Akane sadly spoke to him right after he shot Tonami: 

“Believing in the meaning of the stars was something only she herself held, and it was as if she was being told that the stars were just stars by the others she believed to be her comrades. When she began to consider that perhaps it was not the incomprehensible others who were truly isolated, but rather herself, true loneliness arrived. The moment of being cast into the sea of true loneliness, without even the stars or the sound of waves.” (the stars here was implied to be either law, or justice)

It’s been confirmed by Ryo Yoshigami that Akane’s monologues in the PP3/FI novels were written with the plot of PPP in mind— so you all know, this was intentional. The novels really helped me take a step back and assess what I was really looking at as a character, and Kogami’s role in the overall story. I thought he was someone who was on his way to change, I was wrong. I thought that his values have aligned with Akane, again, wrong. Now I know what some of yall are gonna say, that you didn’t misinterpret him. Sure, this statement isn’t for you then. BUT don’t lie to me, those who DID. 🤪

As for the rest, go read and form your own opinion  (PP3 Novels)

Kogami’s sense of justice

As a main character of the series, Kogami’s journey has been up and down, but one thing that’s consistent about him, in the simplest terms: his justice is personal. Whether it’s one of revenge, which he had closed the door on post case 3, his inability to turn away from injustice, and in PPP, his acceptance and taking responsibility of what he stands for, and what he can do. 

In the beginning of Case 3, he was making an effort to avoid killing— even using it as a condition for cooperating with Kinrei on the raid in the train station. This was during a time when he was clearly at a loss of what to do, still swimming in his regrets and just letting himself go in whichever direction life takes him. Come the end of Case 3, we see his hopeful decision to return, and, in PPP, clearly stated during his convo on the boat, his reasons. He did not come back to die, but to help people. This is essentially an explanation of his choice and lack of regret that he failed to explain properly to Akane, but if it wasn’t clear yet, this is also where the lines have been drawn between the two protagonists, interestingly enough, since the beginning of the series. Akane’s sense of justice is directly tied to the law, whereas Kogami’s does not (and, I think a moot point to argue now, will never). 

He does what he does because it’s what he can do. The difference between Kogami S1 and Kogami PPP/PP3 is that he’s found a purpose/place that aligns with his sense of justice. He owns it, and takes full responsibility for it. It’s a facet of growth, though probably not in a direction that would bode well for him if he fails to look from above, as was Saiga's last words to Akane. I can take this apart in a few ways, firstly, and especially towards his “belief” in Akane, he’s a hypocrite (LOL). Says one thing, does another. Wanting to be judged after the fact is like, are you kidding me, man? Right in front of the blood of someone she just tnj’d “you will be judged according to the law”?!?!?!!

Let's take a break, I’ll throw him a bone.

He simply cannot turn away from injustice and would rather get his hands dirty than allow others to get away with their crimes

This is a great callback to his time with Garcia “you hesitated, and now someone’s dead.” See? Charadev. (I’m being sarcastic). It must suck for him that though he didn’t hesitate, Saiga is still dead. 

To me, he’s started walking forwards post case 3, and while he still regrets everything he did before that, he’s left that behind to fulfill a new purpose in his life

In this scene specifically, he would rather kill than have Akane be killed.

Very personal, very short-sighted, very impulsive, reactive sense of justice. That he agreed with what Tonami had said, for all that talk of his belief in Akane, he’s a funny  ̶l̶i̶t̶t̶l̶e̶ guy, isn’t he? 

I’ve always argued that if his aim was that good (and again, Tenzing commented on this, he CAN shoot to disarm someone), then why didn’t he? Kogami in PPP, in every scene, operates on a shoot to kill. I’m no longer here to apologize for the guy, even if he did, three years too late. I think that it helped me come to terms with their differences, and this is fundamental. Don’t get me wrong, I still like his character, maybe even more now that we’ve learned quite a few things about his… shortcomings (lol), but I’m not gonna make excuses for him in the same way he doesn’t make excuses for himself. He chose. He still chooses to. Cool motive, still murder. 

Where this will lead him, it’s been alluded to in the film. Tonami is what a misguided Kogami could become, and even Saiga clearly reminded him of it. That’s a matter for his future, but know that this movie is sowing seeds the creators may decide to reap someday.  

Things I love :

He got his balls kicked!!! Love that for him 🤣

Used to complain about how lousy his shirt looked is in pp3 and whoooaa he took the jacket off and I'm sweating

WET HAIR

TACTICAL GEAR

The PP OST and the dominator UI, before he takes his first shot *chills*

Despite all my beef about him, I still really do love the guy. Now I just dunk on him every chance I get, it's fun. And ofc, I still have a tiny bit of hope about his future, and I’ll be holding him to that standard, otherwise yeah, he can die in a ditch (or if we’re going there, he can die whilst leading an uprising to destroy Sibyl) 😉 

Akane

So when I said earlier that everyone is being measured against Akane, I really meant it. She had taken a back seat since the PPSS films, and in PP3/FI the whole mystery surrounding her imprisonment was an invisible hand driving many elements of the show. PPP is HER film, and as a character, her continued relevance to the series' thesis cannot be discounted.

“The law doesn’t protect people. People protect the law.”

If Kogami was consistent about his sense of justice, she is even more so. What makes her leagues above him is that she’s driving change, and change DOES happen in the manner that does not allow her to break her principles… that is, until the end of PPP 😉. I’m not going to elaborate on her sense of justice, it’s pretty straightforward even if the series likes to throw stones at it as if following it is the hardest thing in the world. What makes Akane stand out is that it's actually not hard. Look, ask yourself whether it’s easier to kill another human being or not— I’m not talking about exceptional circumstances, but even then, I think you know the answer— there’s a moral and ethical basis here that she shares with a great number of people. Killing is wrong, it’s against the law to take another life. To me, the point of each iteration is to keep stacking odds against her through characters, each with their own complexities and nuance that the audience is made to empathize with and contrasted to her sense of justice, resulting in making it look like her principles are ideal and impossible to achieve, when actually, they're not. 

One of my favorite lines of the film, when Tonami says to Akane, “these are the facts that lie in the shadow of the peace that you enjoy”. Let’s be real. Akane is privileged. She’s not had to fire a gun to defend herself in a war torn land— but the argument against this is the same argument for it— it’s because she doesn’t have to. Kogami is back in Japan, it stands to reason that he must adhere to its laws, because despite his experiences abroad, he is not and will never be above the law. 

I’m gonna touch on something I already discussed on twitter, because there’s a difference between the way Kogami has killed, versus the way Gino and Sugo have. 

As far as the series has shown, the following are Sibyl-sanctioned “killing”, the last one specifically relates to PPP:

As judged by the Dominator (LE/DD)

In cases of national defense/during the execution of duties as members of the NDF

In cases of self-defense in the course of an official operation

It stands to reason that just because they are sanctioned does not save the person from their hue deteriorating, because that part is directly related to a person’s view of guilt. Throughout the show, the audience is constantly reminded that the act of (indirectly) killing does not necessarily impact one's hue (e.g. the PP of the person who manufactured the gun is not the same as the person who fired it, the whole premise of the foxes in PP3, etc), hence the "guilt" associated with the act falls on the person who does it, which may result in a higher cc. A person is able to absolve themselves precisely bec they know they're doing it within the confines of the law, but this doesn’t always follow (e.g. Sugo’s hue deteriorating in Case 2). There's a good example of this in action during Akane's operation in PPP, when Tonami issues the order to kill, and the team, who had been disarming/arresting everyone a few minutes before, was left with no choice but to defend themselves, often resulting in a kill.

While the Peacebreakers were able to hand over this guilt to Tonami via the Divider, Gino and Sugo could not. At the start of the film, they only used the guns when the Dominator was not functioning. The difference with their actions in the last third of the film is they participated in an unsanctioned operation with Akane, have killed as a result and are now likely above regulation. Had no idea the words “once the hounds have thrown away their collars, public safety will never tame them again” also served as foreshadowing as this is probably why Sugo and Gino were requested for transfer to the SAD. And if you’ve been paying attention, you’ll notice that Gino actually gets the job done with fewer bullets than Kogami does. Kogami, from the start, comes into the scene, kills all his enemies on sight without hesitation. This is a huge difference, and this is what Akane is trying to keep him from defaulting to. Violence to fight violence was not the answer, but they clearly do not align on this. It’s a perspective thing. 😉 

So why did she do what she did? 

In principle, she made herself an anomaly, directly challenging the decision to repeal the law, by committing a crime in public while not having her PP deteriorate. In short, she pretty much broke the law to protect the law. So how did she objectively know that her plan would work? 

I had a few discussions on twitter surrounding this, and frankly the “she knows she’s doing the right thing, not for herself but for the greater good” doesn’t cut it for me, nor does the premise of “leap of faith”. To do this, she HAD to have known with certainty that her hue would not deteriorate because if the dominator suddenly activates for her, then it was a pointless act, and more importantly, she was fully aware (as stated in the PP3 novels) that she was committing a crime. 

There are cases to be made of course, the first being she knew that Kasei is merely an android and that Akane avoided shooting the brain (effectively keeping Kasei alive), but that still doesn’t establish the fact that Akane does not absolve herself of the act, and again, that she needed to objectively know this would work. This is theory time, but the only thing I can think about are two specific things, one in the film, one not. 

Defying Sibyl orders to enact her own operation in the Kuril Islands - this is directly disobeying Sibyl, using her Chief Inspector authority to assign temporary roles to Kogami and Frede so they could participate, loading the Stronskaya Docs to her Dominator and giving it to the General, all these, unsanctioned and should have at least raised her PP. My guess is, in the aftermath, she noticed that it had not, despite the scale and the effort and potential losses had things gone wrong, and decided that was enough to go ahead with the “answer” she found for herself.

She had to have procured a gun. This was not in the film - but procuring the gun establishes her intent/motive, and should have also raised her PP - my guess is it did not. This would have been sufficient, but you can imagine, until the point of carrying the gun to the venue (probably hidden inside her hat), the fact that she wasn’t flagged basically made it certain her plan would not fail.

In the June 25 roundtable (link) , Director Shiotani wished that if he had 3 more minutes to add, he would have added a scene right after Atsushi’s death where the men in the roundtable ultimately decided to proceed with the abolition of the law. In hindsight, I think adding this scene would have been better, because it takes away room for interpretation that Akane was actually in a desperate situation, and not just frustrated at the close of the case. In the movie, this was supplemented by Kogami’s line “what Tonami said is probably going to come true, the law will likely be abolished.” Not as desperate, if you ask me. 

Deviants

The difference between Akane and Atsushi is that, Atsushi, in his capacity as a double agent and methodology as a Bifrost inspector, is like a puppet master holding the strings, indirectly enabling change and leaving mere traces of his impact while others either take full credit (or fall) from it, whereas Akane pushes change by directly challenging Sibyl head-on. We have yet to clarify Atsushi’s motivations in rising the ranks of Bifrost (he was alluded to be on the way to being a congressman or that he had the talents for it), and the fact that he’s played double agent for so long with his methods steadily growing shady over time just goes to show that there was clearly a better way (and he ofc acknowledges it). 

In the same way a CA can only be recognized by Sibyl by committing crimes OR if a Dominator was wrongly pointed at them, Sibyl becomes aware of these deviants (I’m gonna call them that) the moment they start defying Sibyl while being able to keep their hues clear. Perhaps Atsushi would be an imperfect version of a deviant, Akane the better one, and Arata probably the ideal despite being CA, sort of like Genesis 3-4’s Makami Sou. It would be interesting if Akane becomes APA, let’s see (read the Genesis links above 🙂). 

“Do you believe in the potential of humans?”

Post-op Akane was forcibly promoted to Atsushi’s role (iirc, a Department Head of Statistics in the Ministry of Welfare c/ o Steohsama's translation). I think it can be read two ways: one, in the context of the recently closed case, to get her fully out of the way and busy with other, bigger stuff that she was already dipping her toes in prior to Atsushi’s death (referred to during their convo, about her not “making a fuss”). Two, that she really did have the aptitude to be someone like Atsushi— only that her methods would clearly be different. Now that she’s back in the CID, there’s obviously a question of Akane’s future as a statutory enforcer (fun fact, the creators pretty much confirmed that it’s just a name for someone judged according to the law but whose PP did not deteriorate / someone who was appointed as an enforcer whose PP is below regulation ( link / link ). If Hinakawa will be promoted to an Analyst, then there’s a spot open for her in Division 1, assuming she’ll be playing detective. While I think this is likely to happen, I think it’s a boring outcome for her. Like Atsushi, I want her to move up in the world, especially if the world is gearing towards Sibyl going public. It’s going to be interesting what role she’ll play in the future, especially because, as Niki had so nicely put, “she can’t do this alone”. 

Oh, Koaka. 

Objectively, I no longer think the ship is romantic in canon. I’m gonna copy-paste some thoughts I already shared at length in discord and edit parts of it, but if you’ve seen me the last few months, this isn’t new.  

This is nitpicking, because I'm a writer and facts like they don't know each other, not really (they spent not more than 100 days in s1, maybe a few days in PPP) are things that are at the back of my mind always. I have yet to see Kogami and Akane treat each other more than the pedestals they put each other on (arguable for Akane but I think this is also why she keeps getting disappointed that their sense of justice doesn't align).

This divide between their sense of justice is their biggest flaw as a potential couple, and one that is too fundamental. I do not see compromise here, especially after the events of PPP. If Kogami were to gear towards a positive change, then there’s hope, but I leave very little room for that now. I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing, either. I see it as a potential stance that the show is trying to make. “You murdered someone, you can’t go back.” If he had been heading towards change it should have been on the way for a while, not a “possibility” that he keeps failing to live up to. Getting over this hopeful assumption took me a while, but I think that it also helped me appreciate the wider story being told. 

That being said, I think that romance in stories is important and I would like to see the writing team go there, not just from a shipping perspective but from a storytelling/amping up stakes perspective. In PPP I felt how Gino was much, much closer to Akane, and I didn't see this previously. In the past he was more like a controlling dad esp in s2, undermining Akane's POV, improved a bit in the pp movie though he still felt a bit on the overprotective i know better than you side (nicely resolved in ppp where we see a piece of his mind btw)— there's a whole lot of trust there. With Kogami and Akane, while they cleared the air after the infirmary scene, once again I saw that trust shaken when he shot Tonami. 

These characters are depicted as human beings, and I think that entails grounding. While meaningful connections can be made through short moments (destiny, if you will), relationships built over time like literally and not let's have a nice moment in a film i'll see you next movie kind of thing, is something that, to me, means more. That said, Kogami was separated for a long time and it's lichrally impossible, but they're in the same place now. Where does that lead them? This is where part of my hope lies, small as it may be. Granted, this is not that kind of show and I'm fully aware of that, which is also why I'm happy to get what we get and that artists/fic writers are there to fill those gaps.

I still ship them but a lot less— I find it funny because even before PPP, I was always looking for more (I'm greedy haha!). I always saw the PPFI scene as just the beginning of their relationship— I wasn't convinced that scene was enough, despite the romantic undertones. And let me tell you the betrayal I felt when I found out the reason why they did the whole back to back thing in PP0308 was because... IT WAS AWKWARD FOR HIM TO CROUCH DOWN THE LITTLE WINDOW OF HER CELL and not the little romantic shit I had going on in my head— I just ( ╯°□°)╯ ┻━━┻

I went through the five stages of grief but at the same time it's not as bad since it's not like I didn't think that way from the start (it's just me being anal about it all, really. Because I would end up writing whatever I wanted anyway and canon didn't really matter in the grand scheme of things).

I do like their dynamic now given the recent developments, Kogami especially being particularly unskilled in the romance department just makes it all the more funny (I'm not capable of writing him that way though so I guess all my fics are ooc now 🤣). If they don't develop past the Arguably Platonic™️  way they treat each other then I won't be surprised if I stop creating for the ship, likely bec it will no longer satisfy my enjoyment of it.

Final Thoughts

I think it’s pretty much confirmed we’re getting more, it’s just a matter of when (can’t believe I’m staying here forever, huh?). Director Shiotani wishes that he will be making PP in the next 30 years, gotta love him for that. 

As the series progresses, there was a clear tonal shift and hopeful direction it seems to be heading towards. To me this is partially because in a practical sense, this benefits the prolonging of the show (which we already know is true), but in a thematic sense, destroying Sibyl means the end of the series overall. No Psycho Pass without the Psycho Pass. And to this I give credit where it’s due. This is not the kind of progress you’ll see if Urobuchi is still in the writer’s room, and frankly, the complexity and depth of the show ever since he left has pretty much taken off in great strides. I had wished they were heading towards a natural conclusion (Sibyl going public) and leave it alone for a decade before they pick it up again, but I guess the producers have other plans. After all, they don’t have any other IP that has withstood the test of time, is ahead of its time and continued to remain relevant as time went on. While not perfect, this is an amazing feat of a series, and this movie is a stellar addition to it. 

They’ve got a dilemma of course, because until now it seems they went with a serialized format (with a definite ending) versus an episodic one (criminal of the week). By choosing to expand the world and explore other facets of society, all the while connecting the threads in an overarching plot, they have to complete the “passing of the torch" before going back to an episodic format, which means they MUST give the new kids their time of day,̶ a̶n̶d̶ ̶e̶x̶c̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶a̶s̶s̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶a̶ ̶s̶e̶c̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶y̶ ̶h̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶c̶o̶m̶p̶l̶e̶t̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶l̶i̶n̶k̶s̶ ̶b̶y̶ ̶e̶x̶p̶l̶a̶i̶n̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶w̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶h̶e̶l̶l̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶d̶e̶a̶l̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶S̶h̶i̶z̶u̶k̶a̶. Shifting the timelines allowed them to usher in the new cast, but now they’re marketing the legacy cast and have to contend with their obvious popularity compared to the new, fully knowing that the legacy cast is returning to the back seat once we kick things off again. This is a problem that can be solved if a spinoff is decided for SAD, because at least a chunky (huehue) part of the cast will be cordoned off doing their business in Dejima, while the CID with its usual players can stay where they are. I think if you’ve been following Director Shiotani though, this is not happening without him in the driver’s seat, so it’s like… if they’re smart he will delegate this task to someone he trusts and we’ll get both a main and a spinoff, then a converging point somewhere in the form of a movie. 🎶Psycho-pass forever!🎶 (to the tune of Emilia Clarke "best season ever" GOT S8 interview, iykyk). 

Finally, I’m just gonna say that I love Akane so much, I’m glad she got the spotlight on her in this film. To be able to experience this film is unforgettable, I’m so grateful that it was possible for me. I’m training myself to expect she’ll take a step back next time I see her, but more than anything, I hope to see her happiness fulfilled, no matter what that entails. Once more, I just can’t thank these creators enough. They’ve made a series and a world I’m obsessed with, makes me think and makes me evaluate its implications in real life, makes me create!!!!! I’m so happy that they continue to believe in the stories they want to tell. I hope they are all healthy and resting now (until the next one, eheh!)

I’ve talked way too much and it’s really just because I want this out of my plate so I can start writing my fics now lololol. If you made it this far, thanks for reading! Always happy to discuss! 

[curufiin]

Just found Calantar and I wanna know more about the baby🥺

OMGGG i’m so happy you like him 😭😭 okay let me try to explain his deal in an actually coherent way bc apparently i am bad at doing this

SO. He’s part of my curufin au, aptly named Ringmaker Curvo (fic coming never), where Annatar instead seduces Curufin while he’s still in Nargothrond to make the rings of power.

Basically after Luthien kicks his ass, and before Curufin gets thrown out of Nargothrond, Sauron decides he can’t go back to Morgoth like this and embarrass himself because Morgoth would kill him. So he ends up flying in the direction of Nargothrond, crashlands somewhere nearby from exhaustion, and is found by hunters from Nargothrond who take him there.

Once inside he snoops around, and finds out about the general chaos inside going on including the two C’s. Annatar proceeds to pretend ro have some super important request, is granted a meeting with Curufin, and they bond over their love of smithing. They end up going out pretending to go rescue Finrod, Curufin discovers Annatar is Sauron (he doesn’t really care and is immediately planning to use him and betray him later), they run into Carcharoth and murder him, and get the Silmaril somehow. Shoutout to @maironsbigboobs for helping me with this mwa

So anyway more unspecified things happen and honestly idk the plot of the AU. Onto Calantar. Celebrimbor disowns Curufin early and leaves Nargothrond by himself. Curufin is absolutely devastated, and by this point his sanity is at some questionable level, and he’s also kinda in love with Sauron (sauron x curufin ftw yay). So he approaches him, and is like “hey. My son fucking abandoned me. Give me another son.”

Obviously they can’t just procreate since they’re both guys and Sauron doesn’t feel like getting pregnant, so they decide to actually create a baby. Like, literally craft a baby. Curufin gives up a part of his soul for this (and almost dies), but they still need the flesh to bind the soul with. Sauron uses his flesh, probably cuts off a forearm, and after a long ritual involving necromancy and grave robbing and whatever, Calantar is made! He’s born as a toddler so no need to deal with an actual infant.

Originally, he was just named Laurinquar (golden fist) Curufinwe/ion because Curufin is awful with names. However, since he was made of Maia flesh, Calantar is *very* attuned with the Song, and his light powers eventually show up, hence the name Calantar (lord of light/bringer of light). He also inherited Sauron’s shapeshifting, but he can only shapeshift into elven forms, not animals.

Eventually Curufin is kicked out of Nargothrond anyway, plot happens, and he dies. I haven’t decided if Curufin should be taken to Angband as a “prisoner” or if he should die in the second kinslaying, but either way, he’s dead, Sauron’s got a ring, and Calantar is in Angband now.

The deal with Calantar is that he’s basically a mash up of every bad thing about Sauron, and every bad thing about Curufin. He’s arrogant, snide, extremely haughty, he’s a perfectionist, he thinks he’s better than everyone, and he is extremely loyal to his parents. He truly believes that Sauron is bettering the world, and he gets very aggressive when he thinks someone is insulting his family. He was also raised partly by Morgoth (who definitely also wanted to use this demon elf child for his own purposes) sooooooo

All of that means he functions as a very efficient attack dog for Sauron once he does grow up and get his powers under control. He isn’t really involved in the War of Wrath because he was still pretty young, but in the second age he does do a lot of dirty work for Sauron, including commanding his own battalion to attack Eregion. Ofc he has either no idea or only a vague idea Celebrimbor is his brother, and Celebrimbor has no idea who he is. When Sauron gets “imprisoned” by Ar Pharazon, Calantar is in Middle Earth managing Sauron’s henchmen and property (yay property manager!) and generally laying low. He fights in the Final Alliance, almost dies, and goes into hiding for many years.

Since he’s made of Sauron’s flesh, this means he’s also sort of bound to the ring in the sense he can feel its presence and can feel it calling to him. Eventually, he’s sent out to find the ring and return it, and this is where his elven disguises become useful. While Calantar is a huge asshole, he is perfectly capable of playing the role of a wise elven guardian and get people to trust him, only to turn on them at the last second. Watch out frodo