#and also like. upgrade it as folks get older.

[inflagrante-delicatessen]

it's always "pull the pin, squeeze, and spray in a sweeping motion" but never "grab a mask" or "how to clean"

[nanenna]

Let's Wrap this Up, Folks

Sleepy King Masterpost

No editing, we die like Vlad (slowly, painfully, and unmourned). I'm so happy to say this is done!

---

Danny held Cujo close as he scritched him behind the ears, nothing like stinky puppy kisses to help him feel better. And right now he felt pretty awful! Dark Dan had been Ghost King too, it’s just that no one ever told him so he didn’t know. Well, judging from how Johnny and Kitty reacted no one else knew either, and he guesses that was a good thing. Except now everyone does know, between Johnny and Kitty, and the whole of the Far Frozen he’s pretty sure gossip is already getting around.

“Alright, everyone ready to sit down and explain some shit?” Stinky trenchcoat man said. Danny had been introduced, he just didn’t care to remember Blondie’s name.

“Language!” Mom scolded.

“Yeah, yeah.” Stinky plopped himself onto one of the chairs. Wonder Woman sat elegantly in another while Batman loomed over her chair’s back. The not-a-ghost guy, Deadman, was hovering near Stinky.

Danny decided the safest thing to do was to squeeze himself between Mom and Jazz on the couch. Cujo laid himself out across their laps on his back, begging for belly rubs. Vlad seemed to take the Batman approach, standing off to the side and looking rather annoyed.

Stinky pointed at Danny, “Let’s start with the obvious, you somehow, and I’ve yet to figure it out but I will, are Phantom.”

Danny looked over at his parents. Mom smiled brightly as she patted his arm, “Why don’t you show them what you can do?”

“Yeah, Danno! Show them the Fenton gumption!”

Danny sighed as he transferred Cujo over to Jazz’s lap. Thankfully so long as he was getting attention he’d probably be okay. He stood up and moved into the middle of the room. “It’s kinda bright,” he warned before letting his transformation wash over him. “Tada,” he said lamely, arms held out as he stood in the middle of the room.

“Christ on a cracker!” Stinky yelled as he flopped back dramatically.

“You should see what Vlad looks like,” Danny said wryly.

“Daniel!” Vlad yelled angrily.

“Constantine already told us you two are the same form of being,” Batman said gravely.

“I would also point out that young Danny here has already accused you of some very suspicious activities,” Wonder Woman added.

“Vladdie was going through some things!” Jack stood and shook a fist at the Justice League.

“He’s working on reforming,” Maddie added with a smile.

“The biggest thing he was holding over my head was my secret identity,” Danny gestured as he spoke, then stopped and stared down at his hand. “Am I wearing armor? What? Where did…?” He looked down. He was covered in black armor with a white like loincloth, or whatever those are called, and some kind of white fur cape at his shoulders. He found the cape behind him and held it up: yup. White fluffy fur, kinda reminded him of the yeties. “Wait, I don’t have horns, do I?” He felt over his head, thankfully just finding his regular hair.

“No, Danny, you don’t have horns,” Jazz said with a giggle.

“Well excuse me, Pariah has horns! And so does Frostbite, this cape reminds me of him.” He patted himself, getting a feel for his new armor, it felt weird. “Where did this even come from?”

“Congrats, it comes with the title,” Stinky said with a hand wave.

“I don’t get it, the other ghosts said it wasn’t like a magical title or something, that Pariah just declared himself king and did everything himself. Why am I getting the magical girl outfit upgrade?”

“Pariah stole the crown, much like your weird uncle here tried to do.”

Danny snorted at Constantine calling Vlad his weird uncle.

“But the crown is much older than Pariah Dark, it decides who it belongs to.”

Well that was just great, he’s pretty sure Clockwork had something to do with this. “Ugh, this sucks! How do I get rid of it?” Danny asked.

“You don’t.”

Everyone just stared at Constantine.

“What?”

“Congrats, you’re the new Ghost King. Comes with a castle, an army of thralls, and a pretty significant power boost. Probably doubled since apparently you’re the king twice over.”

“No, I have school on Monday! I can’t go to school looking like this!” Danny waved at himself.

“Danny,” Jazz said while trying to hide a grin, “the armor wasn’t on your human form.”

“Oh… right.” Danny de-transformed and looked down at his hands, the rings were still there. “Um!”

“Sorry, kid, no such thing as a part time king, the crowns and rings are permanent now.”

“Noooooooo!” Danny wailed! His normal life! That he was finally getting back since his parents put better protections on the portal after finally telling them the truth! “I just wanted to graduate high school, was that too much to ask?”

Batman grunted, apparently in agreement.

Danny pointed at Stinky, “This is all your fault! If it weren’t for that spell you hit me with they wouldn’t be stuck.”

“Yeah, sorry about that.”

“Danny! Here you guys are!” Ellie came flying into the room, her backpack dragging on the ground. She stopped when she spotted the Justice League members all staring at her. “Uh….”

Cujo barked and scrambled out of Jazz’s lap, leaping for Ellie.

“Cujo! Who’s a good boy?!” The two began happily and loudly rolling around on the ground.

Sam and Tucker followed shortly after, both pausing in the doorway. “Uh… Danny?” Tucker asked slowly, “Why are Batman and Wonder Woman in Vlad’s living room?”

“More importantly,” Sam cut in, “why do you have the Crown of Fire over your head? Twice?”

“Turns out I’m the Ghost King, and so was you-know-who.”

“Which you-know-who?” Tucker asked.

“Nasty Burger explosion.”

Tucker still looked a little confused.

“Since Constantine said the second crown was from an alternate timeline, I’m guessing it belonged to an alternate version of yourself, one you also had to beat in combat.”

Danny sighed and deflated, “You really are the world’s greatest detective.”

Batman’s only response was a twitch of his lips. Danny never wanted to play poker with him.

“Danny, why haven’t you told us about this?” Mom asked in that very special tone of voice that meant she was Not Mad Just Disappointed.

“Well… he was evil,” Danny blurted out as his shoulders hiked up to his ears. “I don’t wanna be evil.”

Jazz came over and pulled him into a hug, “And we’re taking steps to make sure that doesn’t happen, part of that is getting you a proper support network. And look! Now we can ask the Justice League for help.”

“If you don’t mind, why hasn’t anyone called us before now?” Wonder Woman asked.

“What? So an overshadowed Superman can run amok and then there’s a photo of me punching Superman in the face on the front of the newspaper? No thanks.” That was the last thing Danny needed.

“What do you think the magic user branch of the Justice League is bloody for?” Stinky asked loudly.

“I didn’t know there was a magic user branch!” Danny defended.

“None of us did,” Tucker added. He moved to go sit on the floor and lean against the couch, Sam joined him.

“In all fairness, we do not advertise Justice League Dark,” Wonder Woman said with a gentle smile. “But now that we know our assistance is needed we are happy to help.”

“I’m not sure what you can do at this point, we’ve locked down the main way ghosts have been getting into Amity. Mostly it’s the natural portals now, and there’s not much anyone can do about those.”

“Can you get the GIW to back off?” Sam asked.

“Oh! I hadn’t thought about that,” Danny said eagerly.

Batman frowned, “What’s the GIW?”

“Hey!” Ellie came up to the side of Wonder Woman’s chair, “Can you teach me how to sword fight? That sounds so cool!”

“Why ask her?” Danny wandered over, leaving his friends to explain the Gits in White to Batman. “You can just ask Pandora.”

“I don’t have four arms like Pandora,” Ellie whined.

“So just duplicate, it’s easy!” Danny stuck his tongue out and furrowed his brow in concentration, sweat beading on his forehead before his arms split into a second pair. Then, just like Frostbite taught him, he made four ice swords, one in each hand. “See?”

Ellie rolled her eyes, “Oh, it’s so easy! Says the guy who can’t even make one whole duplicate.”

“It’s hard!” Danny defended. “And I can, I could do it with the exo-skeleton, just… not since.” He’d been trying, but duplication was hard, he didn’t seem to have quite enough power. “Wait a minute, I have a power boost with the crowns.” Danny took a step to the left, Danny also took a step to the right. Now there were two Dannies with a perfectly normal number of arms, each holding an ice sword. Each also had a pair of crowns over their head. “Huh, so that’s what it looks like,” both Dannies said in unison.

“Ew, stop it, that’s so weird,” Ellie said in disgust.

“Hey guys! Look what I can do!” Dannies both said with a grin as he popped out several more duplicates. This was going to be fun!

---

Omake:

Danny trudged into school on Monday, chatting with Sam and Tucker, still wearing the crowns and rings along with his normal clothes. He went straight to his locker, getting ready for the day. On time for once!

“Hey Fenturd!” Dash jeered from down the hall, “Why’d you miss school on… uh… what’s that?”

Danny closed his locker and looked up at Dash, “What’s what?”

“What do you mean what’s what? What’s that above your head?”

Danny looked up, then back at Dash, “What’re you talking about?”

“Don’t play coy, there’s a crown above your head! It’s on fire?????”

“Dash, I think I would notice a floating, flaming crown above my head.”

Dash looked completely confused, he looked over at Kwan, who was also frowning. “Kwan!”

“I can see it too, it’s there.”

“Right! Hear that, Fentina?”

Danny just looked at Dash like he’d lost his mind, “This is a really weird prank.”

“I’ll prove it!” Dash whipped out his phone and took a picture, then held the screen out. “There, see?”

Danny looked at the phone, “I just see me and Sam and Tucker.” His friends also leaned in and looked at the screen.

Dash pulled his phone back and looked at it, sure enough the crown wasn’t in the photo. But it was also still floating above Danny’s head, and Kwan had also seen it. What was going on?

“Anyway, I’m gonna go turn in my homework, I don’t want to get stuck in summer school.” Danny turned and wandered off to first period, his friends in tow.

Dash was… very confused. He knows what he saw, he knows the other students saw it too!

“Isn’t that the crown the Ghost King had?” Paulina asked as Danny left.

“I… think so?” Dash said uncertainly.

“I think there were two of them,” Kwan added.

They all followed Danny to first period, they had it together after all. They arrived just after Danny, just in time to hear Mr. Lancer shout, “Sword in the Stone! Mr. Fenton, what is that over your head?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Danny answered calmly while Sam and Tucker, standing just a step behind him, were wildly shaking their heads and making various “Do not” gestures.

“I… You… that is…” Mr. Lancer glanced back and forth, clearly conflicted.

“I managed to finish that essay,” Danny said cheerfully handing it over. “Sorry about Friday, but it should be excused.”

“Yes, I was told about that… something about the Justice League?” Mr. Lancer stared at the crown.

“Yeah, I got to meet them! It was wild.” Danny smiled charmingly.

“Alright, yes, well… please take your seats, class will be starting soon.” Mr. Lancer looked at the crown one last time, then seemed to decide it wasn’t his business and to carry on like usual.

“Oh my god,” Danny whispered to Tucker and Sam as they went to their seats, “I can’t believe that worked!”

“Just your usual day in Amity Park,” Tucker said with a snicker.

Val came walking over once they were seated. She stared at the crowns over Danny’s head, then down to the rings on his fingers no one had noticed yet. Her eyes turned to narrow slits. Danny put a finger to his lips and winked.

[mionemymind]

Can you plsss do an imagine with Wanda (or whoever u feel is right) where reader is a formula 1 driver? It'd be so cool. But you don't hv to ofc. I'm a new follower and i absolutely adore ur works <3

Getaway Driver (Rewritten)

Summary: Based off my incorrect quote, Y/n is the getaway driver for Wanda's mission.

Warnings: Shooting, Cursing, Slight Blood, Fluff

A/n: Before y'all comment, I really suck ass at action sequences lmaoo. Please try to imagine something better. But this is for the folks that love F1 and Wanda (@thatdudeusimpfor @canyonyodeler @pikachooo3 @rayisaknight) also gif credits go to Redbull

I had rewritten this the very next day because I was so unhappy with how I did the action scene. Hopefully this is better :)

Word Count: 4.3k

Masterlist

“Lights out and away we go!” The rumble of engines passed by as cars zoomed past the start. The roaring cheers coming from the fans grew louder with each second. 

Starting in pole position, Y/n gets away unscathed from the mess in the back as well as her current teammate, Max Verstappen. They stay side by side through the chicane, protecting the front positions as many drivers behind them try to slip past. 

In between turns two through five, multiple close calls occur as the the Stake F1 team showcase breaking issues this early on in the race. Y/n hardly got out of the chicane without hearing mishaps from the back. 

“Fucking cunt,” George Russel stated to his race engineer, Marcus Dudley. The fans screamed and laughed as the message was played out loud for the whole broadcast to hear. 

To mediate the tensions, a commentator stated, “For this British Grand Prix, we have a total of 52 laps with a forecast of dry conditions.” 

Coming from the paddock, Will Button announces his guesses for the race today, “It will honestly be a close call for first between the young driver of Redbull, Y/n, and her older teammate, Max. I know a Redbull 1 / 2 position will happen but my money is on Y/n as they’ve been on a winning streak for the past three races. As for third position, Lando Norris in the McClaren would be my final guess.”

Will moved closer to the McClaren garage as multiple shots show off the engineers, mechanics, and leaders. “They’ve recently redesigned their floor as well as the front wing. This big upgrade in the middle of the season might be the break that McClaren has been hoping for since the start of the season.” 

Coming up on their first lap, Y/n still leads the race. “51 more to go,” she thinks to herself. Although her head should be in the race, her heart couldn’t help but wish for this race to be already over. A certain red head was all she could think of. 

Two hours away from Silverstone, Wanda listens closely for enemies. She could sense two of them guarding the very door she needed to be in. “On my signal,” Steve mouthed. 

Just as Steve gave the go ahead, the sound of F1 commentary started to play in Wanda’s ear. “Lights out and away we go!” Wanda walked through the hallway, incapacitating the guards, allowing Natasha and Steve to drag them to an empty room. 

Natasha gave Wanda an ‘are you serious’ look as the commentary also played in her comms. “Why am I hearing about a race right now?” They all stood outside the entrance to the headquarters room. Around five guys and one guard were currently there from the looks of it. 

“Sorry, I had meant to only set it to my comms.” Wanda brought out the hologram and changed the settings before looking at Steve for the next set of instructions. 

“Since when did you care about racing?” Wanda shrugged in response as Steve signaled with his hands on which people to take care of. 

“I’ll tell you later.” 

“Are you fucking blind?” Y/n yelled to her race engineer. Lance Stroll had almost hit her side at turn seven, almost costing her the race had they actually made contact. “If he keeps racing like that, he’s bound to hurt somebody.”

“Copy that. We’re already in contact with the FIA about that.” Y/n’s grip on the steering wheel hardened. It was only lap 19 of 52 and her nerves were getting the best of her. She knew the race was going to be easy but her excitement to see Wanda again was causing her to lose focus. 

“I hope she’s watching me somehow,” Y/n thought. It was stupid to hope though as the driver knew Wanda was currently on a mission. It would be highly unlikely that she would watch her race, there were more important things than watching cars go round and round. 

Regardless though, winning this race was important to Y/n. This was the first race as an official couple. While the media hasn’t found out yet, she certainly didn’t want to give Wanda a bad impression. After all, if your girlfriend was continuously saving lives, the least she could do was win a race. 

“This ones for you Wanda.” 

“That should be the last of them.” Steve tied up the last enemy on base and sent the coordinates to backup for retrieval. “Let’s get to the rendezvous point. It’s around 30 minutes west from here on foot.” 

Wanda pulled out her secured phone as they walked out the secured building. She opened up the F1 app and immediately tuned in for the last couple minutes of the race. 

“We have a battle between the two Red Bulls, Max Verstappen and Y/n Y/l/n, for P1.” Steve gave a disapproving nod as they walked through London, trying their best to blend in with the crowd. Wanda could care less of Steve’s approval for her antics. The mission was nearly over and she wanted to at least support her girlfriend from far away. 

“Oh God! There’s a crash at Luffield! It’s a Mercedes!” Wanda watched in horror as the car flipped through the gravel multiple times before hitting the fence, landing in an awkward position. Had the gravel not been there, the car would have surely gone through the fence. A safety car was brought out, allowing people to pit. 

“I believe that was George Russel’s car that had just crashed.” Wanda flipped through the drivers until she found Y/n. Although she knew that wasn’t her car, seeing her safe and sound brought Wanda relief. 

“Jesus, is George okay?” Y/n asked. Wanda smiled at her girlfriend’s natural concern. Although it was one lap away from finishing, it was nice to know that the safety of others was the first thing that Y/n thought of. 

“Wanda.” Looking up, Natasha gave a silent command to put her phone away. “We have people tailing us. When I say go, run as fast as you can. Make sure to stay close.” 

Slyly looking back, Wanda could point out the people that looked out of place. “Fuck me.” 

“Thank you all for the wonderful race! The car was practically a bullet and everyone did so amazing today.” Y/n slid into first place and did a mini celebration on her car. 

As the camera crew came closer, she jumped in front of them and grabbed the camera. Taking off her helmet and balaclava, Y/n yelled, “This win is for my beautiful girlfriend! Can’t wait to see you babe!” 

Looking at the time on the screen, Y/n rushed past the cameras and went straight into the paddock. She ignored all the weird glances and congratulations she got on the way, the race win still fueling her adrenaline.

“Y/n? What are you doing?” Christian yelled but Y/n ignored it. It wasn’t like Red Bull had the balls to fire her for not celebrating.

Her assistant, Niya, had followed suit as Y/n took off her helmet into her dressing room. “Is my car ready Niya?” She nodded as she typed up a statement on her iPad. The team was going to be unhappy at the lack of answers but she knew they were ultimately happy with the points she scored for the team.

In no time, Y/n was out of her race suit and in an all black attire. She ran out of her room, yelling a thank you to Niya. Up on the screens, it showed Max at P2 while Lando was at P3 just like Will guessed. Several news outlets tried to catch up to Y/n, but she was not having it. 

“For the first time in F1 history, we don’t have the P1 spot filled. It seems our winner of the race had an emergency situation to attend to. Regardless, congratulations to Red Bull for the 1 / 2 positions.” 

Y/n smiled at Will’s comment as she passed the gates. This was going to be all over the news ‘Y/n runs off after P1 victory’. Yet Y/n could care less for all the speculations. She had to see her girl and nothing was stopping her. 

Hopping into her jet black Ferrari, Y/n sped out Silverstone. It was around an hour drive to the rendezvous point, but knowing the country like the back of her hand, she was guaranteed to make it on time.

“Does anyone know who the getaway driver is today? Fury stated that we’ll know the day of the mission, but I was never briefed about it,” Steve inquired as the team finally got away from the enemies. 

Wanda glanced up from her phone, “It’s my new girlfriend.” Not a lot of things shocked the assassin and the super soldier, but that comment did. 

“Is she qualified?” Natasha quipped. She found it strange that Wanda hadn’t mentioned her new partner. In addition, the lack of information on Wanda’s girlfriend was also alarming. What if she was the enemy? What if she was an assassin? So many questions ran through her head, but kept her anxiety at bay. 

“More than qualified,” Wanda stated with a proud smile, “She’s a driver at her day job. Plus Fury gave the approval for it just for this mission only.” 

Natasha and Steve digested Wanda’s words and continued to walk. However, Natasha wanted to know more, even if Fury did approve of it. “How did you two meet?” 

“Funny story, I was actually running away…” 

Wanda was surrounded. At every single avenue and exit was a marked enemy and with no back up, she only had herself to rely on. “Shit.” 

Wanda hurried herself out of the hotel, still noticing all the eyes around her. Thank goodness that it was still broad daylight. The enemies weren’t that careless to attract a crowd. 

As if sending a silent prayer, all attention diverted to the red ferrari that pulled up to the hotel. Before the valet could go up, Wanda rushed to and opened the passenger seat. She hopped in and closed the door.

Turning to the driver’s side, Wanda fully expected some old man to occupy the seat, but when her eyes met comforting brown eyes, a pretty smile, and furrowed eyebrows, she was hooked. The red head was distracted for a couple of seconds, before asking, “Do you know how to drive?”

Wanda knew she looked ridiculous. Any sane person would immediately kick her out, heck even call the police. Furthermore, the chances of a rich stranger even offering help was little to none, but when Wanda reached for Y/n’s emotions, she was even more surprised to see that this stranger didn’t feel any of that. 

“I do.” The accent almost made Wanda forget everything, but the sight of enemies getting closer made her focus. 

“Then drive.” 

“So you hijacked your girlfriend’s car, asked her to get you out of a sticky situation, and then survived?” Steve chuckled at Natasha’s question. The story felt like something out of an action movie, but then again, they were superheroes, so anything could happen. 

“I don’t know how, but she managed to get me out of Spain safely. I even asked her to drop me off at our pickup location. Her car wasn’t bulletproof, but she was so fast, they could hardly get a scratch on her.” Wanda smiled at the memory of their first encounter. 

“At the end, she didn’t even ask why I needed to run away. I think she recognized me from the news and just wanted to help. But before I left, she asked for a date.” How crazy does one need to be to ask the very person that put you in danger on a date? 

“I said yes because why not? I liked her and it was the least I could do after she spent a whole hour driving.” It was Natasha’s turn to laugh at how made up the whole story sounded. But when the assassin could not pick up on a single lie, it made her chuckle more. 

“Well I can’t wait to meet her,” Steve remarked. They were 10 minutes away from the pick up point. 

“And she better knows how to drive,” Natasha added. Wanda nodded quickly, the nerves finally making its way to her head. 

“I promise. She’s good.” 

“Where is she?” Natasha didn’t mean to sound aggressive, but they were still on a mission, something she ran a tight ship on. The crew were a minute early to the pick up point and Wanda had forgotten to ask Y/n to share her location. Right now, the witch paced back and forth with her phone in hand. 

The assassin didn’t want to add to Wanda’s already nervous state but they needed to leave. Before Wanda could send another message, a loud car screeched to a halt in front of them. Once the smoke settled, Wanda smiled at the sight of the getaway car. 

Opening the car door, Y/n got out, wearing a suit similar to her driver attire but in all black. “Am I late?” The wide cocky smile on Y/n’s face was hard to hide. The driver knew she was on time but didn’t dare to comment. 

Immediately noticing her girlfriend, Y/n closed the door and picked Wanda up by the thighs, spinning her around. The giggle that escaped Wanda’s lips almost made Natasha barf at how love sick the two were. 

As Y/n placed Wanda back down, she pulled her in by the waist and gave her a long kiss. The two almost forgot that they were in front of a crowd as Wanda ran her hands through Y/n’s hair. 

Natasha wanted to grumble at the unprofessionality but Steve’s look stopped her. Wanda was in love. This was something Steve had never seen before, and he was not going to dare to ruin it. This wasn’t to say that the assassin wasn’t happy for Wanda. She really was, but the mission was still the priority. 

Breaking the kiss, Y/n mumbled, “I’m not too late am I babe?” Wanda shook her head no as a large smile was plastered on her face. 

While holding Wanda’s hand, Y/n looked at Steve and Natasha, “Hi. I’m Y/n Y/l/n. It’s nice to meet you.” Letting go of Wanda’s hand, Y/n reached out to shake their hands. 

Steve was the first to shake Y/n’s hand and said, “Nice to meet you. My name is Steve.” 

Natasha bumped Steve out the way and shook Y/n’s hand, immediately liking the firm grip Y/n had. “I’m Natasha. It’s nice to meet you, but I think we should get out of here.” 

Stepping back to Wanda’s side, “You’re right, let’s get y’all out of here.” Y/n stepped around to open Wanda’s door, something both Steve and Natasha mentally noted.

Once everyone was buckled in, it was like a switch flipped inside Y/n’s brain as she zoomed from the meetup location. 

“Someone is following us.” The rest of the group turned around at Y/n’s comment and noticed the entourage that was heavy on their tail. Y/n had barely driven for 10 minutes before enemies found them.

“I thought we got rid of them,” Wanda grumbled. She wanted her first mission with her girlfriend to have gone a bit smoother, but nothing is ever how she planned. 

The red head looked over her girlfriend’s suit, hoping that Fury had given Y/n a bulletproof suit. Last thing Wanda needed was for Y/n to bleed out. 

Blocking her anxiety away, Wanda focused on the mission at hand. 

“Do you think you can lose them?” Steve asked, ready to fight. Remembering the map she carefully studied, in 10 miles was a mountain with lots of turns. Right before it was a small village. 

“Get rid of the bigger caravans and I’ll take care of the two smaller cars. Do it quickly. There’s a village up ahead.” Y/n steadied the car as Steve nodded in understandment. Slowing the car down, Steve predicted his route as Natasha did the same. 

Once the enemies were close enough, the two hopped out of the car, each on a different caravan. Immediately, Steve used his shield to pierce the front left tire, causing the caravan to veer right into the woods. 

Steve hopped to the next caravan before it crashed. By now, multiple shots were being aimed at Steve, Natasha, and the car. 

“Keep us close. I need to help them,” Wanda stated. Y/n nodded as she tried her best to slow down at a safer speed for Wanda. Crawling to the back of the car, Wanda used her magic to fling a couple of enemies out of the cars. 

This ultimately assisted Natasha as she finally pierced her caravan’s tire. Instantaneously, the car crashed off the road, straight into a large pile of rocks. The assassin hopped off the caravan, aiming for the getaway car. 

Noticing the large gap, Y/n whipped closer to Natasha. Landing harshly on her side, Natasha groaned as Wanda held on to her arm, making sure she doesn’t fall off. “Are you trying to hit me with the car?” 

“It was the car or the ground, you choose,” Y/n quipped back. Had they been in a different situation, Natasha would have laughed but considering that the enemies were still shooting, she simply hustled back into the car. 

“Can Steve jump far?” The last caravan was close enough to continuously hit their back bumper. And with all the debris coming from the crashes, the sides were damaged. 

Before Wanda could answer, Steve jumped on top of the car as the caravan stopped into a halt, crashing into everything along with one of the smaller cars. Only one car remained. 

While Steve crawled back into the car and Wanda back in her spot, the village came passing by just on time. The mountain was right before them. 

Pushing the car into different gears, Y/n kept her eye on the rearview mirror as the car drifted through tight turns. The enemy car screeched behind them as it struggled to keep up through the turns. However, the straights were its friend. 

Up ahead was another set of turns, something Y/n already memorized in the back of her head. “Natasha, keep trying to shoot at them. I need something to distract their driver.” 

Pushing the getaway car to its limits, the turns proved hard for Natasha to hold on to, thankfully, Steve was holding on to her. “Aim for the driver’s view. It may be bulletproof but anything is better than nothing.” 

Natasha did as told, managing to aim perfectly even with all the wind rushing past her and the aimless turns up the hill. 

“We have a quarter mile left! Keep going at it!” Natasha emptied clip after clip as Wanda tended to her slight wound. Bullets came back towards their car, none created a single scratch on the car. 

Rounding the last turn, Y/n drifted perfectly to stall the car in place for a couple more seconds, allowing the enemy to catch up even closer. Keeping a couple seconds between them, Y/n pushed the car into gear, sending it through the last straight. 

“Get back in!” Y/n hardly gave Natahsa time as she pulled the car into the hard right. Before they knew it, Y/n had been driving backwards. In the next second, a grapple launched from the car, landing right on the enemy’s bumper. 

”Hold on!” Everything turned to a blur with how fast Y/n was reacting. Steve almost got whiplash and motion sickness from all the drifting and wild turns. Within the same second, Y/n used the momentum from the car to fling the enemy off towards the cliff. 

As the enemy hit the guard rail, it started to tumble through the air, pressing another button, the grapple released. Pulling up the handbrake, Y/n straighten the car back out onto the road. Driving away with a satisfied smile, Y/n was happy to see an explosion from the mirror. 

With a hand on Wanda’s thigh, the rest was smooth sailing for Y/n as she drove them to safety. 

The car arrived, smoke trailed from it’s path as Y/n continuously pushed it past its limit. While Steve was thankful to have arrived earlier than expected, the nauseous feeling in his stomach held his compliments back. 

The pair from the back quickly got out of the car, throwing a thankful smile to Y/n as they headed inside, ready to debrief about the meeting. 

Once they were out of sight, Wanda was quick to giggle. Nothing was particularly funny, but the redhead couldn’t help but laugh. Not really understanding what Wanda was laughing about, Y/n merely chuckled a little at how adorable Wanda looked. 

“Do you think your boss will be pissed about the state of the car?” Y/n joked. The driver could probably afford whatever car Fury provided, nonetheless, she wanted a good first impression. 

“I think,” Wanda placed a hand on Y/n’s cheek, a smile still evident on her face, “you did amazing today. I knew you were a great driver but I didn’t expect you to handle all the gunshots like it was nothing.” 

Y/n kissed Wanda’s palm, leaning in closer to her touch. “I think with all the superhero stuff happening, I’ve become immune to things like that.” Y/n shrugged as the pair got closer, faces nearly touching. “Plus it helps that I know my girlfriend would do anything to protect me.” 

Leaning in for a kiss, Y/n nearly groaned at how soft Wanda’s lips were. While this wasn’t their first kiss, the feeling of Wanda’s lips was something Y/n was never going to get used to. All the races, fast speeds, and fame was nothing compared to the feeling of kissing Wanda. Just the privilege alone made Y/n light headed with love. 

As Wanda slowly continued to kiss Y/n, her stomach grew with tightness, her mind numbing with stupid thoughts such as ‘what if I climbed over the console and I made out with her?’. While there would be absolutely no complaints from Y/n, Wanda knew they still had an audience. 

But god, Wanda couldn’t think when it came to kissing Y/n and they were hardly even making out. What was going to happen once they actually did have a heated make out session? Was she going to pass out? 

Regardless, the two pushed their limits on how long they could go without air. Soon, Wanda broke the kiss but she craved to kiss Y/n again. Not wanting to push her luck, Wanda pressed a couple pecks on Y/n’s lips, sealing the deal with one more long kiss. 

Leaning back in her seat, Wanda covered her mouth, enjoying the feeling of how plumped it was. Ultimately, she couldn’t hide the smile on her face as Y/n looked at her with adoration. “I’ve been wanting to kiss you this whole day.” 

Y/n grinned as she leaned over the center console, “We can still kiss all you want babe. Name the time and place and I’ll be there in minutes.” 

Wanda laughed as Y/n puckered her lips, ready to kiss again. Giving in to her girlfriend’s antics, Wanda cupped Y/n’s face and kissed her once more. 

Before it could go any deeper, Wanda broke it, causing Y/n to pout. “You can’t just hold your lips hostage like that.” 

“Well dekta, we’re still on a mission.” Y/n rolled her eyes at Wanda’s response. It was not a good enough reason to stop kissing. 

“Well babe, what if I told you I won my race today?” Y/n licked her lips, hoping it was enough to entice Wanda to kiss her again. 

“You won?! I’m sorry I couldn’t come and I tried watching the end but-”

“-just kiss me babe.” Y/n pulled Wanda for another kiss, not even caring that Wanda was unable to make it to her race. There were still multiple races to come and multiple opportunities for her to watch. But kissing Wanda was enough for Y/n. Everything else was just a bonus. 

By now, Wanda couldn’t hold back her moan as the kisses got deeper. Too busy in their own world, the pair didn’t notice Natasha approaching the car. 

The assassin rolled her eyes at the scene. Regardless, she knocked on the window. The two jumped from the unexpected sound. Their dilated eyes focused back at Natasha as Y/n rolled the window down. 

“Meeting starts in a minute. Say your goodbyes.” Without a response, Natasha walked back into the base. 

“Am I going to see you soon?” Wanda asked, feeling like a teenager asking when she was going to see her girlfriend again. 

“You will. I’ll make sure of it.” The blush on Wanda’s face deepened. She kissed Y/n one last time before exiting the car, knowing that if she stayed any longer, she would have been unable to leave.

Walking backwards to the base, Wanda waved goodbye. In normal Y/n fashion, she made donuts at the front of the base, before leaving. 

Once the dust settled, Natahsa came back out. “She was good.” 

Wanda turned around, giving Natasha a small smile. “Thank you.” 

“It’s gonna be nice working with her again.” The smile on Wanda’s face grew wider at the approval. 

As the two walked to the meeting, all Wanda could think about was her getaway driver.

Taglist: @halobaby  @arelyitsherec8 @blackxwidowsxwife @cristin-rjd @madamevirgo @trikruismybitch @paradiselost916 @mmmmokdok @morbid-gaymer @dailyavengering @itsnottilly @helloalycia @randomshyperson @tomy5girls @daenerys713 @ensorcellme @lezzzbehonesthere @imagine-reblog

@sighsam @olsensnpm @tquick99 @feolok @emilyprentisslittlewhore @mvddison99 @iamapotato @yuhloversxx @mjaudrey @upsidedowndanvers @somewhatgreatexpectations @wandavixen @magicallymaximoff @username23345 @coollemonsaresour @littlewinchester15 @aimezvousbrahms @afuckingshituniverse @am-just-a-cosmic-joke-to-me 

@ohmygooddamnbisexualmood @diaryoflife @s7uts @newyork1432 @the-anxious-stargazer @hello-mtf @marvelousbelladonna @ima-gi–na-tion @obsessed-with-wandamaximoff @the-camilucha 

@itsnottilly @171611 @kaitlynroseb @daisybri7 @drpepperobsessed @bemyvitamin @musicinourlips @marvelousbelladonna @gingerbreadcookieforlife @xastrydx @chasethemoon @naixia00 @lostandsearching @stupidsapphicsstuff @haechanana @the-camilucha @severepeanutartisanhands @owloftheshadows @somewhatgreatexpectations @ywuen @mixed-fandom-mess @loomontoia @ilovemarvelwomen @coxmicbabygirl  @cyanide-mustard @mrs-avenger3000 @prentisshoe @andrea-stark @simpforwandanat @abimess @randomshyperson @yourtaletotell @magically-queer-stuff 

@imapotatao @iliketozoneout @maximoffbrossupremacy​@olsensnpm​ @psychadelichues​ @whitelotus00 @taliiiaasteria @tynix @autorasexy @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @hiiraya @reginassweetheart @milkeeteaa @alyciaddict @justgotlizzied

@msmothermaximoff @ielliesitchyeyereposts

[teenwolf-theoriginals]

dad!tommy

pairing: tommy shelby x reader + dad!tommy

warning: as usual, tommy swearing

summary: a collection of short fics inspired by this fic of florence having tommy wrapped around her finger

the school bake sale

The kitchen, a mess. Flo, even more so. The school's yearly cookie stall market had arrived. Students, or rather parents, were asked to bake goods to sell. The profits would be split between upgrades and supplies for the school and the local community garden. Clapping her hands together, Florence giggled when a cloud of flour exploded. Waving it away, you wiped the excess flour from her cheek and pulled the gingerbread cookies from the oven - Flo’s favourite.

“Shall we have a little taste?”. You asked.

Eager little hands reached for the warm cookie, Florence giving a thumbs up. “I hope I sell some”. She nervously commented after finishing the other half.

“I’m sure you will, sweetheart. I’ll pack the cookies away while you go get cleaned up, and then we can go”.

Hopping off the stall, Florence ran to wash up. When she returned, each cookie had been packed away, ready for the bake sale.

Whatever nerves Flo held had tripled. Her usual bouncy demeanour barely noticeable as she made her way down the stairs. Tommy ventured from his office, briefly catching his daughter’s flat mood.

“What’s wrong with Flo?”. He whispered to you.

“Today is the school bake sale, she’s nervous. Thinks she won’t sell any cookies”.

“When’s the bake sale?”.

“1 pm”. You replied, kissing Tommy on the cheek and escorting Florence to school.

As one of the volunteers, you kept a close eye on Flo while helping set up the stalls. By early afternoon, the street was buzzing with parents, children and older folks looking to indulge their sweet tooth and help aid the education of young imaginations and their community. A few had wandered towards Florence’s stall, but only three had brought her cookies.

“Only three people brought my gingerbread cookies”. Flo said, lowering her head, and wiping the corner of her eye.

“More will too. The bake sale has only started, sweetheart”.

She sighed, her confidence draining rapidly. Your heart dropped. Flo usually enjoyed a challenge, inheriting such a trait from Tommy. But she also loved to succeed, also a trait handed down by her ambitious father. Speaking of Tommy, you noticed his car pull up further down the street. He kissed you hello, checked in on Florence and then made his way back to you.

“You did something, didn’t you?”.

Before Tommy responded, Johnny Dogs loudly declared for all the market to hear. “I have quite the appetite for some dessert. And I hear this is the place to get the most delicious gingerbread cookies!”.

Arthur and John joined him, making it known whose stall they were here for. “Buy a fucking cookie. Help the kids, eh”. They pressured, clapping several people on the back and displaying their “or else” Shelby stare at those who were hesitant to line up at Florence’s stall. Beside you Tommy continued to smoke, his other hand resting in his pocket, keeping a watchful eye on Flo whose mood had greatly improved when half her cookies had been sold.

“Tommy, I don’t think this is what the school meant when they said parents were welcome to help”.

He shrugged, squashing the cigarette underneath his shoe. “Our daughter sells her cookies and is happy, and the school gets their money. It’s a win-win”.

With John taking care of the stall, Florence ran up to Tommy, smiling wide. “Daddy! I’ve nearly sold all my cookies”.

“Good job, sweetheart”. He knelt at her level, pulling out some money. “How about you go buy a cookie for Mama?”.

She skipped away, returning with a cookie. Happily accepting, Florence disappeared again to help John. You smiled, grabbing Tommy’s hand, taking a stroll around the market. By end of the day, Florence sold all her cookies and returned home clinging onto Tommy, exhausted but happy.

like father, like daughter

Clutching Mr Giraffe, Flo carefully descended the mountainous staircase. Tommy’s office light helping guide her. Florence had turned five, six weeks ago, and with a new age came new discoveries. Her favourite discovery was finding out that Tommy was too a night owl. Flo would often let the troubles of sleep get the better of a good night's rest, opting to spend her time with Tommy in his office. Tonight was no different.

“Daddy, I can’t sleep”. She quietly spoke, altering Tommy.

He peered over the typewriter, beckoning Flo over. She smiled and climbed into his lap. They worked in unison, Tommy writing the necessary letters and signing the most important documents while Flo entertained Mr Giraffe with the various decor on the desk. Halfway through the fourth document Tommy was reading, Flo became restless, yearning for his attention.

“Daddy?”.

“Yes, sweetheart”.

Flo titled her head to get a better view of Tommy. “Why can’t you sleep?”.

“Because I have a lot of business that needs to get done”.

Fixing Mr Giraffe's blue tie, Flo frowned. “But Mama says sleep is good for us”.

He smiled at the mention of you, nodding in agreement. “She’s right”.

“Then why aren’t you asleep?”.

Tommy chuckled, his daughter ever the curious spirit. “Sometimes Daddy has trouble sleeping”.

She gasped, hugging Mr Giraffe. “Just like me!”

Bopping Flo on the nose, she giggled, averting her attention back to Mr Giraffe. For the next 20 minutes Tommy worked in silence until he noticed Flo failing to suppress a yawn.

“It’s time for bed, Flo”. Tommy instructed, delicately rubbing her back.

She shook her head, burying it in the crook of Tommy’s neck, mumbling. “No. I want to stay with you”.

“You need rest, sweetheart. Your mother won’t be too happy with me if you wake up tired tomorrow”.

“Can you tuck me in, please?”.

He smiled, kissing her forehead. “Always”.

Grabbing Mr Giraffe, Tommy climbed up the stairs and put Flo to bed. Leaving only when her blue eyes closed and finding you waiting in the hall.

“So when is it my turn to be put to bed?”. You teased.

Tommy smirked, kissing you with a passion that made your stomach flutter. “Right now, Mrs Shelby”.

You giggled when his lips showered your skin with attention. Guiding you back to the bedroom, Tommy kicked the door shut with his foot, ready for bed.

mum says no, dad says yes

Mothering four children came with its unique challenges. Ava heading into an age that craved independence. Charlie and Theo creating mischief with their pranks and cheeky attitudes. And Flo being a Daddy’s girl, which meant every time you said no, she ran to Tommy who couldn’t resist saying yes. Most times, there wasn’t any issue; an extra cookie, more time to play before bed or a trip to her favourite candy store. But today, like Flo, you became frustrated with her lack of listening.

She stomped her foot, crossing her arms to inform you of her displeasure. “I want it!”

“And I said no”.

“But why!”.

You sighed, setting down the last plate for lunch and then turning your attention to Flo. “Because you already have a dollhouse, and you’ve only played with it twice”.

“I’ll play with this one more, promise!” She pleaded, eyes watering.

On cue, Tommy walked in, handing his briefcase and coat to Frances. Upon seeing her father, Flo ran into his arms, smiling with delight that Tommy was home.

“Daddy, can I get a new dollhouse?”.

“Of course, sweetheart. After lunch, alright”.

She kissed Tommy on the cheek, running up the stairs with a revived excitement. He met your disapproved gaze, following you into the kitchen.

“I know that look. What did I do?”.

Throwing down the tea towel, you turned to face your oblivious husband. “Every time Flo doesn’t get what she wants, she runs to you. And then I end up being the unfair parent because I’m trying to set boundaries and rules for her. She has you wrapped around her little finger, Tommy".

“Just like her mother”. He smirked. You glared at him, prompting him to pull you closer. “I will talk to Florence and tell her when Mama says no, she must listen, alright?”.

Opting to get you to smile, Tommy playfully kissed you. First on the lips, then on the cheek, moving down your neck and chest, until you broke out into a smile. 

“Frances can handle lunch. Why don’t you and I go to bed, eh?”.

Running a finger down Tommy’s tie, you stopped inches away from his lips, whispering. “I’m afraid, Mama says no”.

Amused, Tommy licked his bottom lip. “In ten minutes I can have Mama screaming yes”.

“Daddy, let's go!” Florence called from the dining hall.

“Your daughter is calling you, Tommy. Wouldn’t want to break that promise you made”.

Previewing his intentions for later via a heated kiss, Tommy proudly ran his thumb over your red lips. “When I return, I intend on keeping my other promise”.

“You best go before Flo gets impatient”.

“And you best go to bed and wait for me there. I won’t be long, love”. He huskily demanded, kissing you once more.

Taking Flo’s hand, Tommy looked to you, then pointed to the bedroom. You waved him goodbye, smiling. And when Tommy returned to an empty bed, he also learned that when Mama said no, she meant it.

the one where flo runs out of paper

“Flo! Did you do this, eh?”. Tommy sternly asked, spreading out his business documents on the desk. Avoiding eye contact, she slowly shook her head. “You ruined important documents that I need for business”.

“It wasn’t me”.

"It couldn’t have been Charlie or Theo because they were outside with Mama. And Ava is upstairs in her room. So, that just leaves you”.

Through glossy blue eyes, Flo innocently glanced up. “I’m sorry, daddy! I ran out of paper and now your mad at me, and-”.

He sighed, crouching to her eye level. “Sweetheart, I’m not mad”. Tommy whispered, wiping the tears from her pale cheeks. “Don’t take any papers from my office, alright?. If you ran out, wait for Frances or Mama to get you more”.

“I will”. She quietly replied.

Tommy opened his arms for a hug and Florence immediately clutched to his embrace, leaving an apologetic kiss on his cheek. On her way to the living room, she passed you and the boys. Walking into Tommy’s office, you saw the crayon scribbled over the pages and a frustrated husband by the whiskey tray.

“Someone’s been getting creativity”.

“It was Flo. She ran out of paper”. Pouring himself a whiskey, he took a sip. “Next time, make sure she has fucking paper to draw on”.

“I’m going to give you ten seconds to adjust that attitude, Tommy”.

Exhaling, he sat at his desk, placing the whiskey beside the framed photo of you and the children. “I’m sorry, love. It’s just more work. More things I have to fucking fix”.

Rubbing his shoulders, you kissed him, settling onto his lap. Wrapping his arms around your waist, Tommy exhaled once more. “Shall I call Lizzie to bring over new documents?”. You asked, running your fingers through his hair.

“No. I’ll deal with it tomorrow”.

“Is there anything I can do to help?”.

He shook his head. “You already are, love”.

Lifting his chin, you kissed him, lingering until Tommy decided to pull away. “Florence didn’t mean to ruin your documents. You know she hates upsetting you”.

“I know. I’ll check in on her later”.

Leaning into his embrace, Tommy wrapped his arms around your waist. The calm flowed like an autumn breeze, lasting only a few minutes until voices from the hall disrupted much needed peace.

“It’s my turn!” Charlie cried out.

“No, it’s mine!” Theo shouted back.

Both you and Tommy sighed.

“I got the boys, you go make sure Flo is okay”. You instructed, hopping off Tommy’s lap.

If one thing was certain, there was never a dull moment in the Shelby household.

[purity-town]

No update today because I’m still working on scripting + kicking off the next chapter. Lots of fun NPC interactions in this next one, so I’m excited, but I'm still playing around with different cover designs. But in the meantime, ask responses under the cut!

(Disclaimer: My art style is pretty cutesy/cartoony and I don't show characters ages very accurately. Below is still their intended ages at the end of the day.)

Of the main group of mortal characters we’ve seen so far:

Chris is around 26-27 -- while he still lived with his family and worked at their shop up until just before the start of the comic, it wasn’t a case of “having no ambitions and never growing up.” He had a lot of family obligations keeping him there, and put in a hefty bit of effort to make sure they would be fine without him after he finally left to pursue his own things.

The Arms Dealer and Nurse are both in their mid-30s or so; they’re close to the same age, Malik just started going gray earlier. Both have lived in the region for a good while and are pretty comfortably cemented in the community/established in their respective jobs.

The Zoologist is in her early-mid 20s; she’s had time to get some solid experience with animals and start putting together her Bestiary but is still a bit younger than many of the other folks. There’s also a good bit of an age gap between her and the Golfer, who’s her older brother.

Not entirely sure about the Clothier, haha. He’s called the Old Man for a reason.

(Not mortal, but Andrew claims to be in his late 20s. Looks wise, he seems a bit younger. The Dryad similarly appears as a young adult woman.)

(I haven't thought much on other NPCs ages outside of general "kid, adult, older adult," hence why I only have ideas for a few characters.)

Everyone’s ages are pretty rough outlines as I’m not 100% committed to specifics. I also didn’t include the immortal characters' actual ages in that list as they have a much weaker sense of time passing and are much slower to grow/change as people; their exact age is fairly meaningless at the end of the day compared to the mortal folks (think like the band The Mechanisms if anyone's familiar with them).

That being said, for timeline purposes, Andrew is roughly 460 and Alalia 540. Alalia was one of the youngest Dryads at the time of the war, while Andrew wasn’t born until several decades after the war -- while it seems like a large gap, Terraria was in a bad shape after the war and 40 years passes in the blink of the eye on a planetary timescale.

Thanks!! I'm slowly branching out to using new tools/techniques, so I'm glad it came across well.

This is something of a two-sided problem: why I didn't want Chris to have the Shield of Cthulhu and why I did want him to have the Worm Scarf.

Reasons against the shield:

Difficult to include in his outfit/design in a visually coherent way

Difficult to hide even by my standards of "he can pull out and put away his gem hook whenever he wants lol," so I have to commit to drawing it

Difficult to draw -- complicated design and looks different at different angles

Difficult to show it being used -- I have to show him dashing "through" enemies, and getting close to monsters, which just introduces various challenges

Reasons for the scarf:

Easy to work into his design visually -- can be worn more as an "accessory" than a scarf, or can be hidden under his cloak collar

Immediate reward from the Eater of Worlds -- outside of using shadow scales to create a Nightmare Pickaxe Chris doesn't benefit much directly from the EoW fight, though he'll pick up the void bag/vault post-dungeon. He hasn't gotten much in the way of stronger weapons/armor/accessories to-date, so he'll be picking up a lot of upgrades before Skeletron, and this was an easy one to work in so that he didn't get them all at once.

Building up the concept of "Chris can manipulate magic // Chris can create tangible drops from vague energy" and showing growth as Chris gets more used to his abilities

I'll admit that I went back and forth a lot over whether or not he should get the worm scarf, but I eventually figured it was worth it to include. I really only bother showing drops that matter -- hence why I also didn't include things like healing potions or unholy arrows from the Eye of Cthulhu. I won't be 100% consistent with him getting expert drops; like, I don't intend to include the Bone Glove from Skeletron (the Book of Skulls is more important story-wise).

Though I do have to consider how I'll make Chris eating the demon heart make sense in context without coming too out of left field...

[cybertron-after-dark]

Folks, do we consider cheetor an adult?

On the one hand he's older than Tigatron, blackarachnia, airazor and anyone else who was only just made from the protoforms in beast wars, but nobody really has a problem with treating them as adults. He's also with the other maximals bc it's his job, implying he's fully independent, not to mention it's a job that trusts him with potentially deadly weapons, probably not something theyre trusting minors with.

On the other hand, hes pretty clearly a lot less mature than the others on his team, to the point where he gets called a kid pretty regularly, they refer to his transmetal II upgrade as "cyber-puberty" and blackarachnia rejects his advances primarily for that immaturity.

Like. Is he just programmed to be a ditz? Is it just his personality? Is he the equivalent of an 18ish year old young adult, still irresponsible and desperate to prove himself as capable to the others? Or was he created by a different method than the protoform way we see in the show that requires more time to mature because he didn't have all the same pre-loaded personality and information right off the bat? Do we treat him as an adult by technicality or is it irresponsible to ignore the show treating him as genuinely young?

These are the questions that haunt me

[the-fandom-crossroads]

Unity News Round Up!

So at the very end of last week sep 23 Unity backed off of SOME of the new policy. So my original post about what games will be affected is no longer accurate. Link I am making this post to summarize how things are now and kill a few rumors that are still floating around. So Please reblog this one instead of the older post!

What Unity changed back

Legacy downloads will no longer be counted towards the 200,000 downloads! So older games will not have their downloads counted towards the bill. The 200,001 download to happen after jan 1st 2024 is when the fee will activate.

Cult of the Lamb is NOT being removed from store fronts jan 1st. That was a joke tweet and now it is extremely untrue. But the studio is switching engines for cult of the lamb 2.

Also this fee is not being added to the 2023 version of unity or older nor the Personal plan version. (because a lawyer finally informed the execs that's illegal) It will ONLY affect the 2024 version of Unity. So as long as your game is coded on the 2023 ver and you don't update to 2024 when it comes out your game can be published in 2024 and still not have the fee!

HOLLOW KNIGHT SILKSONG IS SAFE! Seeing as 80 to 90% of it has been coded in the 23 version there's no reason they can't finish it in that version.

But if your game will take longer than a year to finish I still recommend switching engines now. It would not surprise me if in a few years they end service for 2023 or older versions to force people to update to the newer versions with the fee.

Here's a link to the open letter announcing the changes.

Mihoyo/Genshin's connection to all of this.

Mihoyo has not yet made a public statement about all of this. But any change to the international unity tos would not affect them. They are partnered with Unity China which is it's own separate company. Unity China would have to adopt the change for it to affect Mihoyo. Which they have not made any statement implying they would.

The reason Unity China is a separate company is because of China's strict foreign company laws. But convincing the Chinese government to allow even an off shoot of a foreign company to set up shop is hard. Nintendo is still fighting to get their foot in the door. The only reason Unity C got in was because Mihoyo backed them. Unity C owes Mihoyo it's very existence. They are in no position to make demands by changing the current contracts without warning.

There were a few rumors about Mihoyo hiring people to develop their own game engine and that is false. Mihoyo did post 5 or so job listings for folks specialized in game engine coding. But it was clearly for code optimization of their current engine Unity. If Mihoyo decided to start building their own engine from scratch it would require the hiring of at least 100 coders focusing solely on the new engine.

Genshin and Honkai will stay on the Unity Engine. When the 2024 engine comes out Mihoyo might upgrade to it. But they would have a customized contract with Unity China and it would not include the current fee plan.

What about all the other Live Service Mobile Games?

In theory their creators could keep using 2023 and not have to worry about the fees. But as I mentioned I can't see Unity keeping the 2023 version usable past 2025. All of these games will easily pass the download threshold as they are free to download and they will pass the profit cap too.

Pokemon Go, Pokemon Unite, Duel Links, Master Duel, Hearthstone, Fates, League of Legends Wild Rift, and Marvel Snap are all still getting updates and won't be closing anytime soon. I don't know how important updating to the newest version of Unity is for these development teams. But in theory all their parent companies can afford the increased fees, they just won't like it.

With Mihoyo off the table Pokemon GO is the big fish Unity execs are aiming for. It gets a couple million new downloads every year and goes well past the profits cap and definitely isn't made using Unity Personal nor is Nintendo/GameFreak allowing Unity ads to play on their mobile game (those are all ways to lower the bill). Pokemon Go can't be moved to a new engine and has too many current users for Nintendo to risk dropping the app entirely to start over with pokemon go 2 on a new engine.

Nintendo has not yet made a comment, but if they do cave and pay the fees. Then there's no way the middle tier games devs can argue against it. even if the couple 1,000s in fees hurts the indie dev more. Unity can point to the couple million Nintendo is forking over for all their mobile games and say "if they can do it why can't you?"

So keep an eye out for what Nintendo does because of all this.

What about Demos, Charity bundles, or game subscription downloads?

The Updated version described in the open letter mentions the game devs being responsible for recording the number of downloads. Most likely because there isn't a legal way for Unity to truly monitor it and so their numbers would never have been trustworthy. If devs are reporting the numbers it's very easy to say downloads before a certain date are only the demos or keep track of how many charity bundles are sold and not count those downloads towards their total.

For Subscription Services, Unity has started to intentionally keep the answer vague. The first time they said developers would pay it like the legacy downloads. In an interview before the correction letter above the Unity President said the subscription hosts would pay the fee. After the correction letter he clarified that he "misspoke". AKA Microsoft and Playstation said "hell no!" that's super illegal to charge us in a contract we never signed we'll sue you to oblivion if you do that. But Unity is being unclear on if that means developers are back to footing the bill for Game Pass downloads. X

To understand exactly how vague they are being. A Reddit FAQ says developers will not be responsible for the fee of game downloads from subscription services. While the site FAQ section answers the question "Are Downloads from Subscription Services required to pay the download fee?" with "Yes" and Nothing more.

TOS Changes and How bad it really is

So the reason we don't know who is paying in some of these situations is because the final version of the 2024 licensing contract is not yet finalized. All Unity did was announce this new fee would be in the 2024 contract. That is why they were able to so quickly go back on what they said. It's just back spacing on a google doc it's not redacting and adjusting an actual legal document yet.

That means this might not be the only change they put in the new contract. This is just the only one they bothered to mention. most likely to convince shareholders they were going to be boosting profits in 2024 even if 23's Q4 is really low.

There being more unmentioned changes is a bad thing because they removed the github extension that updated you on changes made to the TOS. They argue it was because "traffic" was too low. There reasoning for removing an archive of Legal documents was click through rate being too low. They also argued that the TOS was available the entire time on their website. But please understand that is only their current TOS. So being able to compare changes from past TOS's wouldn't be possible on that page. X

The Possibility of this all being a Stunt

One of the theories going around is that they knew this would go over badly to some extent. Not this bad, but still drop the stock value a bit. Enough that the company would look cheap enough for a buy out from another company. The possible buyer being Apple's Mobile Gaming division. So far Apple has not shown interest in buying them and no solid evidence of this happening on the back end has shown up.

But it is pretty well known that the CEO sold stocks the week before this news came out. Which is called insider trading and super illegal. Unfortunately it looks like he might get away with it, with the argument that the sale of those stocks was scheduled months before this announcement was planned.

But that doesn't change the fact that he's sold over 50,000 shares this year alone. Two other officials have sold 37,000 and 68,000 of their shares this year. It's very clear they see the writing on the wall and are trying to offload stocks before the final numbers for the year reach the shareholders and the value of shares plummets. X

If they truly believed in the chance of a buy out they wouldn't be offloading so much of their stock. Because when they are bought Apple would have to pay them based on the number of shares they have at the time of the buy out. So they don't believe they'll be bought any time soon but they do believe the value of Unity stocks are only going to continue to go down.

Even without this stunt the end of Q4 report would have shown losses and caused the stock value to drop. This was most likely their last ditch attempt to show their shareholders something that implied the possibility of future profits.

That's the important thing to remember. They didn't care about how the devs reacted. They knew there were going to be complaints but they didn't care because they saw how much money they could milk if they charged every game to ever use unity for every download of that game. And they knew that would show profitability and increase the value of the company. They only back peddled when it became clear the news was affecting the stock more than anticipated.

Even then the .20 per download was never removed they just pushed back the cap and the downloads counted in hopes that would shut protests down enough for the stock value to go back up. as of Sep 29 their stock value has still not recovered.

Conclusion

Don't trust Unity. Anything they say now is just PR to try in get the stock value to go back up. They did pull back on some of the worst parts of the original agreement and older and most indie games are now safe. But Mobile F2P games and Game subscription games are still at risk of getting hit with the bill. They have also kept things vague enough to allow them to change things in the future once the dust has settled.

So I would heavily encourage those in the early stages of their games development to look for a new engine. If you have any Unity Stocks and haven't already sold them for whatever reason I'd find the time to start selling them. Unity might recover for a bit but they are not going to last long with business decisions like this and even the board members know that.

Oh wow this got so long I am so sorry. But It's all important information and I tried to link to actual articles as much as I could. As of the end of September this information is as accurate as it can be. Nothing major should come up until Unity announces the finalized TOS rewrite or Nintendo comments on the Pokemon Go fees.

PLEASE reblog this one if you reblogged my initial post about Unity Games that were at risk. It's important for people to know those games are no longer at risk of being removed from store fronts. Oh and feel free to reblog with a summarized version.

[pixiemage]

I'll preface this by saying that I love Monty Gator. He's a HELLA cool character whose presence as an angry puppy dog in Ruin gave me way too much joy, and his boss battle in SB proper was SUPER fun! (I do wish Steel Wool had stuck with the stealing-Monty's-legs plotline rather than his claws, mostly for the sake of consistency but also so the excuse for his leg upgrade could've been so he could do some sick dance moves during shows - but I digress.)

I say this because I'm about to say something some folks might disagree with, but every time I see someone argue that Monty couldn't possibly have decommissioned Bonnie, the arguments they use sometimes make me want to just - throttle people for their lack of logic and their willingness to cling to anything that might help prove their point. There are some really well-thought-out arguments in there too sometimes (Bonnie being decommissioned pre-Monty's-claw-upgrade comes to mind, though I always wonder if the reason that was fucked up was due to the switchover from Monty's legs to his claws, and people assuming his lack of upgraded claws means he couldn't hurt a fellow animatronic without them, even though Moon seems more than capable of ripping apart Staffbots and the Staffbots are capable of wrecking Freddy in the Vanny endings - anyway) and I'm always down to see what alternate concepts folks have come up with! But sometimes - sometimes, not always - when I do watch those Monty-Was-Innocent videos, the folks making them are pulling in proof that feels more like they're grasping at straws, which unfortunately weakens the argument they're trying to make.

The popular one as of late is "the green paint around the claw marks on Bonnie's chest are definitely not from Monty's hands, and it's obviously an older coat of paint that we see because the blue layer was scratched away" which...I mean...good concept in theory, but. No?

Bonnie has never been associated with green. In the Pizzaplex, the Glamrock characters have set color palettes that are associated with their respective brands and merchandise. Bonnie's color set is blue, purple, and red, both in his Glamrock form and his Bonnie Bowl design. In all past games, he's been blue or purple. Even factoring in Springtrap, no version of Bonnie has ever been green, not even as an accent color. So why in the world would Glamrock Bonnie have an undercoat of green paint?

And even if he WAS green at one point, then wouldn't it have shown through in - I don't know - any of the other horribly cracked pieces of his chassis, rather than only being centralized around the claw marks cutting into his chest cavity? Every other crack or bit of damage outside of that chest wound is lined in either black or a darker shade of the surface color, not green. It's an extremely specific design choice on Steel Wool's part and I'm more inclined to believe they designed Bonnie's coloring that way on purpose.

Now don't get me wrong, when someone gives me an actual theory detail where something else left green residue behind, I'll give 'em kudos for thinking outside the box (especially when they're on to something solid). I love when people are able to put together clear puzzle pieces with enough proof to back 'em up. But the "old paint" bit feels so much more like Monty fans grasping for straws and I really wanna see people think harder than that. I want to see something concrete, because I get excited when someone finds something I haven't seen before!

In the Ruin DLC, Steel Wool dumped details in our laps to expand on the breadcrumbs they'd already left behind. They had a neon Bonnie sign be the thing that electrocuted Monty, the carpet Bonnie's body is on matches the carpeting in Monty Golf, and they went out of their way to line the claw marks with green. (And that's not even counting stuff that was hinted at in the base game). I'm all for theorizing alternate possibilities, but if someone wants to form a legitimate argument against Monty being the killer, then at least come up with something strong enough to counter what's in the games.

In truth, a few people have put out some really well-thought-out videos rallying for Monty's innocence, and I respect them for the work they've put into it. They've managed to really make me think! I just want to see more folks like that, people who think about what they're saying before positing their thoughts in a twenty-minute YT video trying to save their favorite boy.

Because let's be real, Monty is a fantastic character. I love seeing people who are passionate enough to fight for him. For me, I still lean heavily into the "Vanny made him do it" camp because people aren't wrong, Monty wouldn't have done something like that to Bonnie of his own free will...but the evidence Steel Wool set out for us to find is a bit too damning for me to think Monty was completely uninvolved. I'm just hoping we get some damn clarity from Steel Wool soon because I think, between Who Killed Bonnie and the disagreements over which ending Ruin takes place after, some minor wars and disputes are starting to break out across the fanbase that I reeaaally want to avoid lmao. Give us a hand here, SW! If you're gonna keep us guessing with everything else, then at least give us the answers to something!

[harrison-abbott]

I

The winds had quietened and they gambolled down the hill that

Had seen so many stories in atmospheres of hushed ivy and the

Night had an inky zone now on all that mattered most in the

Changing age. ………………………………………………….

In the old house that overlooked the hill the lights were still

Yellow from the strange isolated man that lived there with the

Shocked grey hair and the countless tales, too, that few were

Known about … only glimmer and glamour, secrets kept hard.

The foxes dallied across the roads by the nights and they

Were never going to be caught and they knew it and that’s

Why they even ventured out before midnight, why they muzzled

At the food bins outside the houses or the gardens in search

Of the cats or the mice, or whatever it is that these animals

Do – for you only ever see them within seconds and then nought.

The schools were back on in January nothingness; the mundane

Dreary walk up the motorway to the high school that

Looked like a building out of a true crime documentary …

The kids were angry that none of the storms had cancelled

The school days, yet; and thus they had to do the jaunts

In the lashing rain and blistering wind that had stopped the

Trains across the nation, had overlorded the news.

Christmas and Hogmany seemed like aeons ago even

Though it was only last month and there was little to go

On with 2024, as a year, save the casual mayhem that happened

On the radio or on one’s phone, with the occasional wowing

Event being one related to a soccer manager announcing his

Decision to vacate at the end of the season or some other

Thing that wasn’t nearly as important as war, except, was:

Only in a civilian way. …………………………………………….

Several of the trees had cracked and were destroyed by the

Storms and many of the folks would miss them because

There was nothing they could do about these giant shards of timber

Lying now on the fields of the park with their clear innards

Outside the gnarly bark and each of them wondered with ease

How easily such a brute branch could kill you if you stood under

It … if you’d been there during that moment in the carnage

When it quit the trunk and thundered down.

II

The cafes have slow businesses and there are various reports from

Week to week about restaurants shutting down, some of them joints

That have been alive for forty years in the city. And there’s not much

To rescue with such incidents, either. Oh, and even some of the

Watering holes, in this nation renowned for alcohol, have had to

Shut the doors also; and on social media these snapshots are met

With sad faces and what not, and it makes one wonder about

The fifty or so people that work in and around that particular

Venue and what on earth they will do for money now that their

Lives have changed. ………………………………………………

But the vans still hurtle buy delivering their parcels and folks

Still go to the supermarket in the busy times all the same.

Some of them even still stop to give the charity magazine seller

A coin or two outside of the revolving doors and when you go

Through said doors the heating in the building is ramped up full

And you sweat or your skin prickles because you’ve just come

Out of the cold and it’s fifteen degrees upgrade in here …

And there are young folks working in the market and there

Are older workers too who have been here, you know, for over

Twelve years. And they play pretty good tunes on the tannoids

High above and you can sing along in a civilian way as you

Go to get your stuff. And there’s this older chap who hasn’t

Worked in the place so long and he is always always always

Cheery and you wonder what gives him the zeal to be friendly

With other folks all the time. ………………………………………

Outside the supermarket the gulls are a bit twitchy and desperate.

And they have grown to picking on the gardens instead, up

In the suburbs, where the humans feed the seeds and bread to

The pigeons and blackbirds (the likable birds). But really it’s free

For any squirrel or rat, whomever, to come and rage at the output.

Following the latest storm, the wind has blown off the fencing

From several of the neighbourhood gardens as well and since

The residents are a bit older now they have hired other workers

To come fix it rather than try and hail up the fences themselves.

Which must be a sad fact to them, that they haven’t the physical

Verve anymore (although some of them are in their 70s, so no shame.)

Brave daffodils and bluebells poke from the fields and woods

In little miraculous pockets of colour, the way they always do;

And they are a cheerful sight indeed alongside the muddled streets.

III

The city is over half a million folks now which is quite a hefty

Number of people if you think about it and I remember when I

Was a kid it was about a hundred thousand less than that, and that

Makes me feel old and I suppose I am getting pretty old … and even

Though I’ve lived most of my life in a leafy suburb which is quite

Detached from Edinburgh, there even seethes this sense of quick-turning

Change, even here, in a place that never quite belonged to urbanity

From what I recall in youth. With the stark differences in the weather

And the way people act differently with technology, most things are

Moving far too fast and it didn’t move that way when you were a boy.

Or perhaps I’ve just come into the thirties with a shock, knowing I

Won’t live forever. Edinburgh is still alive, though, and I am too,

For now at least. Even though it’s night and black outside and lost

And changing, it still has an erratic pulse. ……………………………..

[twistedstoryteller]

I have a question i wanna ask :3

Sunny and mari, what are you Opinions regarding the RSA Students?

Both as "Idia" and "Ortho", and as yourselves.

Another question, sunny, were you always that good in gaming or was that a natural talent you got as "Idia"?

Royal Sword Academy?

I believe that’s technically the school that rivals Night Raven College or NRC that we both go to as “Idia” and “Ortho” respectively which also just happens on the same island as well

Oh. The one school that looks to have a bunch of shinning happy peppy hero boys in them?…………I mean Kel and Hero would have obviously fit with them I guess. Not me………I don’t exactly do “bright and peppy” despite my name

Yes that one Sunny, and I don’t think it’s that bad. I believe that school had their students resemble a lot of heroes and good guys from that one series of movies. In fact I believe two of them remind me of Snow White and the Cheshire Cat. Though I believe the one that reminds of the Cheshire Cat quite funny and enjoyable, while the one that reminds of Snow White well, very beautiful and graceful(Well of course no RSA student any more handsome than Hero!)

Yeah………I think you’re talking about Neige and Chenya big sis(also sis please don’t say stuff like that. It’s……oh it’s too embarrassing to even explain that). I mean Chenya alright but then again this is coming from me as “Sunny”. But Neige………

I think Kel, or was it Basil said that he kinda looked like me, but how do I even resemble that guy? I mean that guy smiles and is way more peppy than I am………plus I’m pretty sure I don’t come close to holding a candle to him

Sunny, don’t say that. Maybe Neige is technically a world famous celebrity but I still think you’re better than him. I know a certain someone would agree with that

Right, thanks Mari

Of course Sunny, your my younger brother!

Now before me and Sunny switch over to our forms as “Ortho” and “Idia” respectively. I should quickly mention when Sunny’s Idia, well………

You don’t have to sugarcoat it Mari. Unlike Mari when she is “Ortho”, I don’t exactly remember being “Sunny” when I’m “Idia” cause of some……stuff that happened(I’m sure you all can figure out which event was responsible for that) I can only find things familiar or deja-vu. But I’m sure I’ll remember more properly later, also before I forget that second question and or get confused by it as “Idia” well, Yes I always been good as gaming. I just got a lot better at it as “Idia”

Right……well, no use stalling now

>eventually both Sunny and Mari focused on their forms to resemble “Idia” and “Ortho” once more. Idia also completely forgets his talk as “Sunny” just now too

Uhh, Ortho. When and how did we get here? In fact in all of great seven’s name what are we doing here again?

>tries not to sigh but also tries to remind calm as to not make his older brother panic

Well Nii-san, we’re here to answer the question of “what our opinions are regarding the Royal Sword Academy or RSA students”

Oh, those guys……I don’t think I even need to start a full ramble on this one. Aside the obvious “RSA always wins against NRC in their 100 years win streak”. They are just so “bright” and “peppy”. Very much a group of sparkly and always eye catching to lots of people everywhere in the sparky white uniforms that are an eyesore for me. Like I wouldn’t be caught dead hanging out with them, no, no thanks. They’re like extroverts but more uhhh “cheery” and “happy like” but in the most cringe way possible, I mean who do they think they are? A bunch of high school idols or “cute” magical girls that preach the power of friendships and all that barf(besides you Ortho are way better than those cheery smily folk, they don’t have the awesome upgrades you have)?

I don’t think that might be it Nii-san(Besides thanks for the compliment Nii-san. But that aside) Besides, I don’t believe RSA students are that bad, sure it sucks that NRC hadn’t managed to secure a win against their rival in the last hundred years, they just see things differently compared to Night Raven College students. Like Artemiy Artemiyevvich Pinker or Che’nya for short. He’s a RSA student but he seems to be good friends with Riddle Rosehearts and Trey Clover. I even sometimes spot him sneaking into the Heartslabyul dorm around the time have their Unbirthday parties

I bet Che’nya-san came to see his two friends and have fun doing all sorts of fun unbirthday activities together

More like obviously steal and take some of the sweet treats at those unbirthday parties………

Oh and there’s Neige LeBlanche who’s a popular celebrity that’s both an actor and influencer just like Vil Schoenheit-san. Sure he part of Royal Sword Academy but he’s actually very nice and friendly that most likely make almost anyone smile

More like make me barf. I swear am I the only one who thinks on what happened in the VDC is purely rigged. Not only that it’s obviously NRC is way better at the thing, especially Vil. Vil much better than Neige 100%. Yeah I said it, Vil’s better than Neige. At least he doesn’t make me think that the other secretly some kind of undercover antagonist that’s steals the heroine from under her nose before she even aware of it! The heroine deserves someone obviously not so plain aka someone more amazing and worthy to sweep her off her feet, someone obviously dating matter like Vil, he’s obviously more attractive and beautiful than Neige. He’s in fact more my type. Point is Vil obviously the better choice of boyfriend/lover than Neige, plus I still think that whole personality fake and oh, did I mention again that song Neige somehow won with is garbage. Pure garbage and-

Uhhh, Nii-san. Let’s stop your rambling right there before you attract any angry Neige Leblanche fans to our location(Besides while Neige is alright. I’m with you on Vil being the better one between those two)

Fine……I’ll stop my obvious bashing/complaining about Neige LeBlanche(For now)

Better. Now I think we both talked about our opinions clear(Though I won’t hesitate to blast the RSA students if they are obviously mean to Nii-san). I believe we can-

Wait Nii-san. Did you mention that Vil somehow the better choice of being a boyfriend/lover earlier in your rambling?

W-W-W-What, N-No! I-I didn’t say that. I said Vil’s the better actor and-

Nii-san. Don’t lie to me.

I thought you had a celebrity crush on Vil Schoenheit-san. But hearing this now, your in love with him

N-No, it’s not like that. I swear it’s not like that! I mean yeah Vil’s pretty and all but uhh, oh great seven……

Don’t worry Nii-san. I’ll do my best to make sure you get together with Vil-san. It might take awhile but I’m sure we’ll get there! For now, I should go see when you and Vil can both hang out together!

>he soon immediately flies off to find Vil for Idia

No, wait come back! ORTHO NO! >he immediately runs after his little brother in a desperate attempt to stop him before said little brother accidentally embarrasses Idia in front of Vil

>the camera also turns off at this point

[blueeyedrat]

Games I played in 2022.

If I were to sum up my year in a word, it would be stable. Game dev work has been steady, not particularly stressful. I got a new laptop, and have been gradually upgrading in other ways. A lot of good and bad things happened to the people I care about, but as a whole I entered the year in a pretty good place, and left it more or less the same way. I suppose I'm grateful for that.

As usual, one of the big constants was gaming. There's the usual time sinks – Animal Crossing, Sky, a bit of Grindstone here and there, and a couple new ones as well. I also returned to some older favorites, like Mario Kart 8. And I put some time into a couple dozen new games, and added even more to my ever-growing backlog. These were the highlights, with a few honorable mentions here and there:

(2021 ⇐ 2022 ⇒ 2023)

Monster Hunter Rise

The game I put the most time into in 2022. I'm new to Monhun, but it's piqued my interest for a few years – a bunch of folks in my orbit got into Monster Hunter World when it came out and that game seemed neat, and Rise seemed like a good excuse to dip into the series myself. It's a good entry point, bringing some accessibility for new players and new tools for old pros, but even then it's still pretty daunting if it's your first exposure to Monster Hunter. With so many different (and often unorthodox) weapons and builds and playstyles to choose from, it might be hard to figure out what clicks for you.

But when it did finally click for me? There was no turning back. Between the base game, the Sunbreak expansion, and all of the extra challenges, there's no shortage of quests to tackle, maps to climb and explore, and creative monsters to hunt, all the while building up ever-more-powerful armor and weaponry. The movement feels good and the combat feels great, and it's fun to drop in on other hunters and play in co-op. And with the two four five weapons in my arsenal, I've got a good variety to keep me going for a while yet.

Beast Breaker

For a different take on monster slaying: a turn-based action game where your primary means of attack is ricocheting around the arena like a pinball or billiard ball, lining up just the right shot to take down giant foes. This was the first game I played from start to finish this year, and I liked it a lot. The combat's pretty unique with a lot of interesting strategy and puzzle elements, and plenty of tools to mix and match. There's a good narrative, a memorable cast of characters, and a good visual style and soundtrack to tie it all together. It's a damn shame this was Vodeo Games' only title before the studio shut down. I would've loved to see what else they could do, and I hope they can find success elsewhere. But if you only get one, you might as well make it a good one.

Dicey Dungeons

Now, if we're talking strategy, style, and soundtrack, this one's hard to beat. Like plenty of other games, it's been in my orbit for a while. Seemed like a nice time all around, but I didn't have a pressing need to play it myself. Eventually it came up on a Steam sale and I heard about some extra content coming later in the year, so I figured I'd pick it up and play a few rounds once in a while... and suddenly it's two weeks later and I've blitzed through the entire game and completed every challenge available. Turns out this game is addicting as hell. Who would've guessed.

As far as deck-builders go, Dicey Dungeons is pretty quick to pick up, and it's fun to come up with a good, versatile strategy and adapt to the dice rolls you're given. Different episodes give you specific characters and gimmicks to work around while still making every individual attempt feel unique. And did I mention the music? Because the music is fantastic. Two weeks (plus a few days for the extra content) well spent.

Hollow Knight

I keep an informal list of "I'll get around to this eventually" media. Games, cartoons, movies, the kind that I'd like to experience on my own so I won't go out of my way to spoil myself on it beforehand. I... didn't make a lot of progress on that list this year. Just haven't been in the mood, I guess.

But I did get around to this one! As well as OneShot, and a couple more recent games further down the list. I quite enjoyed Hollow Knight. The combat could be frustrating at times and not in a fun way, but it was nice to explore and the platforming was great, especially as you unlock more abilities. I'll admit, in my blind playthrough I missed out on a lot of side content simply by just... never actually stumbling across it on the map. It's not a flawless game, and not one I'll ever feel an urge to complete a 100% file, but I enjoyed the time I spent on it.

Just in time for Silksong, right?

Sid Meier's Civilization 6

On the other end of the spectrum: a game I've immersed myself in thoroughly for years, but still never actually found the time to play until recently. I sunk many an hour into Civ 5 back in the day, and the ways 6 iterates on its predecessor are all pretty interesting, especially the emphasis on city-building with districts and wonders. There's no shortage of different civilizations to pilot and strategies to try out.

The issue now is, even though I have hardware that can run the game without immediately melting, a single round of Civilization is still a big commitment in terms of time and focus. I have time, but not that much time. Perhaps I'll make more room for it in the coming year.

(Another honorable mention, and another game I should make time for: Airborne Kingdom. A neat concept and aesthetic, and a pretty chill city-builder. I need to check out the extra content at some point. Same goes for the other builder games on my backlog, like The Wandering Village.)

Prime Mover

I continue to enjoy puzzle games whenever the mood strikes me. Sokoban-esque puzzles like Kine and Move 'n' Bloom, chill sandboxes like Cloud Gardens and Luna, and other curios like SOLAS 128.

It's been a while since I've been in the mood for a good programming puzzle, though, and Prime Mover delivered a challenge. The tools it provides are intentionally kinda restricted on their own, but the game is pretty open-ended and gives you a lot of room to maneuver around those restrictions. And while some of the best games in the genre encourage you to iterate and experiment and make exponentially more complex machines using the simple pieces you're given, Prime Mover openly requires it. The later challenges get pretty intricate, and the final one is the most complicated puzzle I've ever solved in a programming game, by a mile.

Seriously it took me weeks of planning and a dang flowchart before I even started building a full solution. It's an interesting game, if you know what you're getting yourself into.

The Zachtronics Solitaire Collection

While I was in the middle of that programming fugue, one of the big pioneers of the genre announced that they were closing up shop. I'll always have a fondness for the works of Zachtronics – SpaceChem is one of my all-time favorite games, and I put a lot of hours into Infinifactory, Opus Magnum, and MOLEK-SYNTEZ. I respect their choice to end the studio on their own terms and move on to new projects, but I'll miss 'em all the same.

They've also been an influence on me in another, smaller way: solitaire games. I played my share of Klondike and Freecell and other games back in the day, and as a game dev they interest me from a design perspective: by nature they're very small in scope, and it's easy to sketch out ideas and iterate on them and come up with something new. Much like its track record with programming games, Zachtronics has also approached solitaire with a particular design ethos that always feels well-balanced and puts a fresh spin on these familiar concepts, often with new rules and new decks. These are the games that inspired Temple Solitaire, and I'd like to keep drawing inspiration from them in the future. The tarot deck's a coincidence though.

Splatoon 3

I suppose I don't actually play a lot of online multiplayer games nowadays. Casually I've never had a lot of people to play with and have never been social enough to seek it out, and the more competitive side I often find frustrating. I'll play them occasionally, but a lot of the time I either keep to myself and play against the computer (see: Super Smash Bros, Civilization), or play games that are explicitly cooperative instead of competitive (see: Sky, Monster Hunter).

But then there's Splatoon, which has the whole package: a well-crafted single-player campaign, a variety of versus modes, and an excellent co-op mode, all with a distinct style that few games can match. I don't play a lot of shooters, but I loved the first Splatoon when it came out on Wii U, I loved the second game when we upgraded to our Switch, and the third game in the trilogy is just more and better. My brother and I got in on the ground floor this time around, and I look forward to seeing what this game (and this series as a whole) brings to the table going forward.

Chicory: A Colorful Tale

I've been sitting on this one ever since it came out. Not really sure why I waited for so long to play through it – just saving it for a special occasion, maybe. But I can tell you, Chicory is one of the best games I played this year. Its gameplay, well-paced with an interesting core mechanic that's iterated on over and over for a good variety of puzzles and challenges. Its visual style, charming in black and white and satisfying to add your own colors into. Its music, a unique and memorable score from one of my favorite composers. And like its predecessor Wandersong, its strongest aspect is its narrative, well-written and compelling with a neat world to explore and a fun cast of characters. Everything about Chicory is just good, and it was well worth the wait.

Sable

This isn't the last game I played in 2022 – I played LEGO Builder's Journey over the holidays, and managed to squeeze in Kirby and the Forgotten Land just under the wire (boy, does that game go places). But this is the one I wanted to close out the year with.

Sable is a game about discovery. There's no conflict, only exploration. You're presented with a simple narrative, a girl embarking on a coming-of-age journey to find her place in the world, and left to fill in all the blanks yourself through gameplay: You could climb to high plateaus and take in the sights. You could visit every settlement and station, lending a helping hand or an observant eye to travelers in need. You could delve into strange stone ruins to find treasure, or into derelict atomic ships to learn the secrets of Sable's ancestors (and also find treasure). You could hunt down a bunch of weird bugs and fish. You could just hop on your cool hoverbike and vibe across the vast desert.

Or you could take your time. Try everything, be everything, and return home a little older and a little wiser for the experience. And I think the game's interesting setting and atmosphere, its gorgeous cel-shaded vistas, and some surprisingly charming writing made it an experience worth having.

—

I think I need some time to figure out what I want out of 2023: from my work, from my personal life, and from my online presence and all the projects I have kicking around, game-related and otherwise.

I'm sure I'll find some way to pass the time.

But who can say, really.

[manchineel-mistress]

Ok so I've been reading a lot of Yugioh Harry Potter crossovers lately. Mainly because they are the whole reason why I even started rewatching Yugioh dm (like I was not about to accept that this damn Harry Potter crossover fic had actually in canon characterization for the Yugioh characters because It Did Not Match Up with my memories from 13 years ago).

Anyway, I think Yugioh and Harry Potter has this great crossover potential because a) everything has good Harry Potter crossover potential and b) their timelines match up. Yuugi is like.... a month and some change older than harry, and that's something you can’t just leave there lying. They can bond!! Over not having normal high school experiences!! And almost dying constantly!! And Destiny!!

But also like would it not be hilarious for Umbridge to get shadow gamed seasson 0 Yami style. I think it would be hilarious, just, she starts seeing everything as pink or seeing the words she writes and/or hears being carved into her skin as her penalty game. I think it would be silly and funny teehee.

Back to the fics, usually they give the gang magic (either going shadow magic route or millennium items gets an upgrade again), but consider. What if. They don't. Yuugi finds himself in Hogwarts and Dumbledore or someone is convinced he can do magic, but he can’t. Poor baby just sits in charms class and tries to levitate a feather, only to be waving a stick and saying nonsense words. No, the person who can actually do magic is Yami, and that's why they got in this situations in the first place, so every time Yuugi needs to preform magic, Yami has to step in and figure out someway to make his half remembered-mostly-instinct-and-completely-different magic do the thing that the teacher wants him to do. Or it could be the route that shadow magic and HP magic are the same, just different branches, and the folks out in ancient Egypt only learned the shadow magic branch. Wouldn’t really help Yami as he tries his damnest to bluff his way through class, but it would be interesting world building wise. Yuugi does all the writing work though, because they’re partners who share th work.

“But Manch,” I can hear the nonexistent voice in my head that might also be you say, “why the hell would the gang be anywhere near the UK?” Well the Fics (tm) usually end up with shadow court or Bakura goes on summer holiday or Dumbledore and Voldemort are eyeing the millennium items. But like, what if Kaiba or someone just hosts a duel monsters contest in London and the gang just get invited for the summer. Then cue deatheaters and then cue the gang getting kidnapped into the wizarding world. Or at least Yuugi. Why did they invite muggle(s) into the wizarding world? Well damn that pendant sure looks useful in this war- wait what do you mean it’s now tied permanently to that boy- goddamnit I wanted to avoid possible kidnapping charge.

Also, I think that the millennium items could definitely just one shot Voldemort. Drag him into the shadow game, he has enough pride to fudge up and end with him yoinked into hell or something. It would be funny.

So yeah, I’ve been thinking too much about YGO HP crossovers, it's been a couple of weeks and I needed to get the Thoughts out. HP crossovers are my guilty pleasure, especially when they are just tearing the HP world apart or are just incredibly silly. Silly crossovers are my favorite.

[riddlegecko]

here's some hcs abt older jasper (in non-yellow jacket timelines), yippee

their powers fade once they turn 16. he has the misfortune to find this out in the middle of a match at the rollerama. the effects of the mind milk only let them start a transformation, but not finish it, and the fox hat straight up stops working altogether. this kinda sends him into a panic bc no powers means no more matches, and no more matches means no more rollerama money, and no more rollerama money means "oh god, are we still gonna be able to afford our house?". thankfully, the rollerama folks settle on sending the mckenzie family checks once a month (not quite as much money as jasper was making from the matches, but still enough to let them keep their home in pinebrook), if only to keep the family on their good side so they don't rat them out. the family does still eventually decide to downsize to a still nice but not pinebrook nice house, mainly bc jasper's older bro larry has already moved out and started college when this goes down.

as they get further into their teenage years, jasper ends up getting their ears pierced and growing their hair out to a little past shoulder length. he lets his little sister millie style his hair, and he very frequently goes to school with whatever style she gave him that day. she's surprisingly good at it honestly, and even if she wasn't, jasper doesn't give a fuck. what're the kids at school gonna do? pick on the kid who's weirdly good at self-defense maneuvers bc their hair looks kinda silly? nuh-uh.

he still gets crushes all the time, but he's at least better at recognizing his feelings and not. freaking out about them. somewhat. they still get very very nervous about asking people out. jasper's actually considered pretty attractive by his peers, a lot of folks think he aged into his looks quite well despite (or to some, partially because of) his crooked nose and one missing tooth (both gotten courtesy of the rollerama). they have a handful of romantic relationships throughout high school, some definitely lasting longer than others. mostly with girls bc he has a slight preference, but he's gone out with a few guys as well.

they still rollerblade a lot, even after leaving the rollerama! as i've said, he really took to rollerskating after matches, and was one of the few kids to upgrade to rollerblades during his tenure there. they've been trying to teach millie how to skate, and they've taken more than one of their romantic partners on skate dates in oakley park.

he's mostly a jock throughout high school, he's been on hatchetfield high's swim team and baseball team at different points. and while they never fully joined the football team (they've fought kids who can manipulate time and control fire, and they still find football too intimidating for them, which is valid), they did spend a year in the zeke the fightin' nighthawk mascot costume out on the field (they did not enjoy that, the costume smelled really bad). but also, he's participated in the school musical once or twice. they're not a great singer, and they're only kind of okay at dancing (they're a fast learner, at least), but they've got good comedic timing and they're quick to improv a funny line if something goes wrong up onstage. this kid still wants to host game shows when he gets older, so that's prolly the most important skill he could have.

their relationship with their parents gets a little... strained as they age into adulthood. like, they still love each other to death, but jasper gets some conflicted feelings about how the whole rollerama situation was handled. he doesn't regret fighting in the rollerama, not at all, the family prolly would've ended up on the streets if he hadn't. but they question how... responsible it was for their folks to essentially let jasper be the family's main breadwinner, especially with how dangerous the rollerama could be. no one in the family quit their jobs once they got rich, no, but jasper was still raking in like 90-95% of the family's income. again, he has no regrets over participating in the rollerama, but it still gets kinda tense and uncomfortable between him and his parents when the subject comes up.

[angelfoodcake222]

Contains: 2nd person POV, harm to a beloved character, country/mechanic/medic GN reader in their mid/late-20s, platonic relationship.

Art by @smushles here on Tumblr

Today was hard enough as is; your boss was on your case throughout your shift, your romantic partner dumping you for your phony 'best friend' since early teenhood, & now, your car has been towed after your brakes had given out on you. So, to bring all of that to a tally, pesky boss, bad choice in people, & the universe has it out for you. Great. At least you still have your Yamaha parked at home to get to work once the weekend is over, for now.

You thanked the kind stranger for giving you a lift to your home far from the city before hopping out, dragging your feet to the main portion of your house for a quick change of lounge-worthy apparel. Your house wasn't unduly grandiloquent, but it wasn't a hovel either. Well, in your opinion.

Yours is a simple home, holding a whole bath, a half bath, three bedrooms (one guest room, one converted to an office area/boudoir, & the master bedroom), a kitchen/dining room, & a living room where much of your reading materials reside with a padded bay window bench. The storage part of said bench was filled with pens you'd use to fill your books with intimate marginalia, a habit you had formed in your preadolescence.

The mismatched bookshelves lining half of the room's walls, the same walls where a recently sold TV & its stand once stood & your dearly departed folks' (also sold) taxidermied 'trophies' hung creepily, held your numerous treasured tomes of precious comfort characters & scenarios. The hand-me-down couch never looked so welcoming in the time you've owned it, the cushions enveloping you with a loud creak of its aged springs settling after your weary body fully sunk into it. The take-out leftovers you were undoubtedly going to reheat & enjoy later. The garage's sounds never- Wait. What's making all that noise in your garage?

Clangs & clashes sounded from your side garage attached to your home via the pavilion-shielded walkway that practically hauled you towards them after you snatched up the lead pipe you had sitting beside the side doors in case of intruders or large animals. Another habit you formed over your time living alone aside from chronic lock checks & trail cams; inside & out. Your fluffy animal slippers squeak under you with each step but the metallic sounds overpowered them effortlessly. Whatever is in your garage making that commotion must be big. Upset, even.

Now, for context, you do not own just one garage, you just have an average-sized one that can hold two large 4x4 trucks & a normal car that is attached to your house while the rest is well hidden under many shielding. An unconventional, insistent want of your folks was a massive underground base-like bunker that was nearly forty feet high & a floor area of six or more professional football fields (give or take). You had stumbled in there once in your youth while your older kinfolk were working on some sort of immense project that they 'lost' a few days later after telling you it was a secret gift for a very secret friend that you'd never know of. Your memory is hazy, but you still like to go down there via the room-sized lift from time to time for a full disconnection.

The heavy, full metal door groaned in refusal to being moved from its closed position, though you needed to see what or who was causing such a racket; they might be robbing you or something! Most of your stuff was collected scrap parts to 'upgrade' your vehicles occasionally as a pass time & you knew you could replace most of what's in there, but you weren't as expendable as scrap. The noises stopped as bright yellow lights blazed over your half-shown self. Familiar feelings waved over you.

The blood within your body ran cold in milliseconds, goosebumps rose & hairs stood on their ends.

The dual lights flickered, no, blinked at your partially hidden form cowering behind the hinged barrier. You could only make out a hulking mass with the lights sitting where one would expect those of the optical variety to be located & a faint blue liquid around & on the being.

Whatever this thing was, it was a sturdy creature possibly clad in armor of some kind. A warrior, maybe? Your eyes adjusted to see a large gash on what looked like its 'waist' or 'abdominal' region, seemingly lethal. You didn't know much about the anatomy of your own species let alone an alien species.

When the visual hints halted momentarily, auditory ones took the wheel of thought. 'They're hurt!' you thought to yourself. Would this large entity let you aid it somehow, much less near its person? Is the liquid dangerous to you? All decent questions a person with a rational mind would think of in moments like this would have been thought of if your innately bleeding heart wasn't throbbing those reflections to pieces.

Those wide yellow lights seemed to widen as you slowly set the pipe onto the ground, holding your hands up to show that you were unarmed. Seem less intimidating. Try to be friendly in appearance. You smile faintly in hopes of seeming disarming to the hulking shape, speaking kindly to them before gathering metal of your own to introduce yourself.

"It's okay. My name is [Y/N]. What's yours?"

You knelt, holding an open palm out to the figure. Why? You weren't sure, but it felt like the right thing to do here. After a moment of tense silence, the silhouette spoke in a deep, though distressed voice.

"Optimus. My name is Optimus Prime."

I DID IT!

[A/N]: I cannot believe that it took me so long to write a >1000-word piece! Good to have it up though. I hope you all enjoyed reading this! 🤗

[infinitefluffderg]

Jesse’s 2022 Game Review

PHowdy folks! With another year on the verge of collapse and the circus tent to be propped up a-new with a new coat of paint, it’s time to talk briefly about videos game. In the past, I made a list of my top 10 favorite games, diluted into my infamous prose heavy stylings. Not this year. Though you cannot force me away with many bars of corvid ownership from the act of getting flowery with dialogue, I’ll at least attempt terseness. Key word: attempt. Also, 5. 5′s a nice number and it’s less painful to write for.

As a quick reminder to all unfamiliar with my reviewing style: these are games that I’ve played this year that have left the largest impact on me. They aren’t games that came out this year (usually) and they aren’t games I played a lot of this year (though if they were, then DRG would be number 1). Usually I favor uniqueness and innovation over most other factors. Every game on this list is a banger and a half and gets my highest recommendation. With that squared away, let us begin.

Runners Up:

There were a LOT of great games that I played and honestly it becomes very difficult to rank games when all of them are just so damn good. So here’s a list of games in no particular order that really blew me away this year, but not enough to make the top 5.

Tropico 6

Satisfactory

Potionomics

Fight Knight

Disco Elysium

Dead Cells

The Forgotten City

5. Grounded

I play games with my boyfriend a lot. Usually, every day, if possible, we’ll sink a couple hours into our favorite multiplayer experiences. So I usually try to find us new experiences to enjoy to go alongside favorite staples. Grounded as a “Honey, I Shrunk the Kids” survival sim oozing with style and at high recommendation from others, was one I knew would be a hit even before we played it. And then we played it. Well, he played it a lot more than I did, but, I still helped out a lot.

Truthfully, Grounded is as much an RPG as a Survival Sim as you gradually update and upgrade your gear to deal with increasing challenge in this tiny world. The combat system is robust, there’s always a new unique challenge ahead of you, and the bugs are as adorable as they are horrifying. I could sleep with the little noises Ladybugs make in this game. If someone has exported all the bug sounds from this game, hit me up.

4. Super Animal Royale

Like I said in the last game choice, my boyfriend and I play together a lot, so we look for fun multiplayer experiences. SAR was his choice, and one he picked up because free is always welcome. And yeah, SAR knocks it out of the park. Not only is the gameplay well balanced and a thrill to fight online in, but it also manages to create one of the rare Free To Play experiences where you really want to pay the devs money just to support their game.

Nothing gameplay-wise is locked behind a fee, everything you would spend real money on is cosmetic. Plus, if you did like cosmetics, it’s super easy to get enough premium currency by playing the game to afford one of their battlepasses. These passes don’t expire too! You can always go back and level older passes if cosmetics in one season stood out more than other ones. If you’re interested in a cute animal top down and haven’t given SAR a try yet, there’s really no better time than now.

3. Ultrakill

I listen to Ultrakill’s OST on and off when I need something higher energy while I work on complicated projects. Similarly, Ultrakill is the most stylish FPS with Quake graphics I’ve played/witnessed. It runs off rule of cool similarly to its direct inspiration - Devil May Cry. And it all plays so damn smooooooooth.

My boyfriend (don’t tire of me talking about him, we do games together A LOT) is considerably better at this game than I am and I feel like I judge some of my opinions over how much he plays a game. At writing, he has P ranked the entire game on all difficulties, and Cyber Grinds (endless mode) for the fun of it. He’s gotten to Wave 25 I think? I’ll need to check with him again sometime. Anyways, he’ll show me how P-2 looks since his ability is on a whole other level.

2. Yakuza 0

I finally dipped my toes into Yakuza this year and HOOOOOOLY SHIT I was unprepared for what would be a hell of an experience. As someone who has played through Kiwami and about a third of Kiami 2 (remakes of the first and second games), 0 is the absolute best way to hook someone on the series. As the title suggests, it’s a prologue introducing the back stories for the two main runners of Kiryu’s ongoing quest to be a positive influence in the lives of orphans and others. And live. An amazing soap opera thriller crime drama that hits incredible heights constantly throughout its running, silly grade-A side stories, a solid difficulty curve, and much much more.

And by starting with 0, you get the amazing build up to go with it. 0′s incredible story helps temper the lows of the Kiwami remake (which is still a good game, don’t get me wrong) so that you can bounce back into the amazing engine update utilized for Kiwami 2. It’s just a good-ass game people.

1. Super Mario Odyssey

If you told me last year that this was going to be my number one game, I’d call you crazy. As someone who doesn’t easily fall in love with AAA games, preferring indie titles, the idea that Super Mario Odyssey would be such a must-play would have been completely dismissed. But no, over so many many other games I played this year, Super Mario Odyssey is the clear superior. SMO runs on high moments, everything has been so well planned out and the world is big without being overwhelming. This. This felt like the natural evolution of what Mario 64 was. And if you’ve been noting how much I’ve gushed over this year for the last month, then it should come to no surprise that it’s here at the top of my list. Everything was planned and perfected with such clear purpose it’s perplexing.

When this game came out alongside A Hat in Time, I felt that Hat would be superior because it controlled in a way that I wished Mario did. With mid-air dive cancels, a really really fun world to explore, a funny story with great characters. It was only this year, three years later, that I found that Odyssey not only did all that, it did it better. (Well, the writing of Hat is better, but...)

Anyways, if you are interested in a Switch, Odyssey is worth getting a Switch for. Though, admittedly, more if you’re the kind of person who adores adventurous open worlds in a collect-a-thon platform setting.

This is what AAA gaming should be. Anything else pales.

[nickgerlich]

Car And Driver

My father always loved telling stories of his first car. I never understood then why it was such a big deal, but it was very important to him. That 1955 Chevy Bel Air took him and two buddies on a Route 66 road trip from Chicago to LA that year, and by virtue of that, became etched in his memories as much as the trip itself.

Because the two were one.Now that I am older, I have similar feelings toward my first car, although I doubt that car enthusiasts will ever hold it in such high esteem as that Bel Air. It was the summer of 1979. I was home from university and working a summer job at a GM factory in Chicago. My father decided to help subsidize a car, perhaps because he was tiring of sharing the family sedan with me. So off we went to a Toyota dealership in the south suburbs, where one of his former cronies in the car industry sold the tiny Japanese imports.

We settled on a brand new, bare bones Corolla. It didn’t have many features…well, if an FM radio, heater, and rear defogger are features. It had a four-on-the-floor, which now makes me among a dying breed of people who know how to drive a manual transmission. We split the $4000 cost.

The little blue car—just like the one in the picture—became my path to adventure, and boy howdy did I ever. I didn’t sell it until 1984, with the odometer pushing 175K. Routinely getting 35mpg made it affordable and cheap to keep. It’s the stuff of memories now.

Toyota still makes the Corolla, but it has had a slew of style and feature upgrades. Base price today for the Corolla Hybrid Nightshade Edition is just under $27,000, and Toyota just launched a new ad campaign aimed squarely at Gen-Zers and Millennials…people not a whole lot unlike me when I bought my Corolla.

The campaign, dubbed Getaway Driver, features social media influencer King Bach in a 30-second spot just released on YouTube. You’d never know this was the same model I bought 45 years ago. It’s pretty cool looking.

This time around the focus is not just affordability, but also the environment. Toyota has doubled down on hybrids, and thanks to the Prius, has two decades of experience with them. These are both things that are sought after by the target demo, especially given that the average price of a new car in the US today is more than $47,000.

And then there’s the issue that Gen-Zers are not attracted to car culture as much as previous generations. Persons 19 and under represent only one in 25 licensed drivers, while the under-25 crowd comprises just 11%. Toyota may be able to address the cost problem, but getting more folks to drive is going to be more challenging.

I am pretty sure that few saw this coming, that any cohort would begin to shun one of the most defining artifacts of modern culture. Starting more than a century ago, when Henry Ford was churning out Model Ts and Model As, car ownership was a symbol of our freedom, and by virtue of that, we need not rely on mass transit or anyone else to get us around.

But King Bach—who just turned 36—is a huge hit among young adults, with an audience of more than 25 million each on his Insta and TikTok accounts. If anyone can speak to a generation of people reluctant to drive, it could very well be him.

Who knows? Maybe there will be thousands of people who, just like me, forge their first car memories with a Corolla. It is clearly priced to be an entry-level vehicle, even if it is nearly 7X what mine cost. And they would be styling far better than I did, because I’m pretty sure the ladies were embarrassed to be seen in my econo-box ride.

The memories, though, make it worth it all.

Dr “Waxing Nostalgic” Gerlich

Audio Blog