#and all of them were like anime or video games

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Moorhuhn

Debut: Moorhuhn/The Original Crazy Chicken Hunt

This is Moorhuhn. And Moorhuhn is one crazy chicken! Don't let the fact that it looks like a very regular chicken fool you. It's CRAZY! The official descriptions of some Moorhuhn games refer to the creature as "probably the craziest and best-known chicken in the world". I don't think it's true... but they did say "probably", so I can't technically say they're incorrect? I guess?

There is a good chance you do not know Moorhuhn. If you do, it's likely from seeing "Crazy Chicken" games on the eShop or similar places, and dismissing them as shovelware. If you're German, however, you might be pogging your face off, because this thing is the most popular German video game character!

Such a popular character and franchise, and I dismissed it as shovelware upon first seeing it... what a fool I must have been! This must be a hidden gem outside of its home country, and if I were to play it, I would realize what fun there is to be had!

I've played it. I've played so much of it. The mainline games. The spinoffs. They're all mid, mid as hell! Germany, please make better games and characters!

So, the core of Moorhuhn is killing those crazy chickens with a shotgun. They run around, they fly around (with their fat-fingered Garfield hands that no longer even try to resemble wings), and they do cheeky things like block your bullets with a frying pan. This marketable cartoon animal mascot exists to be killed, and that is just so fascinating. Do we like this thing or not? My feelings are complicated.

Originally, Moorhuhn resembled more of a regular cartoon chicken, a design that I prefer, really. But the original game, made to sell whiskey and playable only in bars, was such a massive success that the franchising quickly began! Moorhuhn was redesigned, now unmistakably a scrimblo, ready to be shoved into any genre of spinoff was necessary. This chicken is like Germany's Mario, if instead of platforming, Mario made his fortune by being killed with a gun.

See? There's a kart racing subseries, because of course there is. Moorhuhn Kart 2 in particular seems to be one of the most beloved games in the entire franchise, and... well, it's as fun and functional as you might expect a Moorhuhn Kart to be. I kind of like it! The most fun, however, comes from laughing at, rather than with it. I played locally with two friends, and we had no idea what was going on, until we realized the UI was scrambled among our three screen quadrants! The placements, items, and boost meter you see on your corner of the screen are NOT yours, and you have to figure out where your UI actually is in order to know what's going on. I've never seen anything like it! It's quite an experience!

In this image you can also see some other Moorhuhn Characters! Who does this crazy chicken pal around with? Well, three of these characters- the turtle, the frog, and the mole- have received their OWN spinoff games, which is crazier than a chicken to me! They only appeared as elements of a mid shooting gallery game, and then they got their own games! You know, Meta Knight doesn't have his own game. Meta Knight! The certified coolest guy ever! He just cannot compare to Moorfrosch.

The other characters are even more interesting! My main is the one that looks like Moorhuhn, but not. This is Lesshuhn, which is a delightfully goofy name, and the design- basically a goofier, lankier Moorhuhn- is like Moorhuhn but more charming! The Lore of Lesshuhn is that it is a closely-related, but dim-witted species, so stupid that it's on the brink of extinction. In the shooting games where it appears, you will lose points for shooting it! Be nice to the poor fool!

The final two characters are where it gets really great. Snowman and Pumpkin! In their original appearances, these are not even characters. Just objects that you can shoot if you want, for some extra points. There were so few actual characters to choose from that these two had to be brought to life! As a fan of both snowmen and scarecrows, I am not complaining.

What does "Moorhuhn" mean? It means "Moorhen". This is a Moorhen! You might notice that it is not a chicken. Yeah, I don't know why they decided on this name for a domestic chicken. It's like if I made Moorhuhn, but decided to call it Woodcock, since cock means rooster, even though a woodcock is already an existing bird (an incredibly fantastic bird). I just don't get it!

I could go on and on about Moorhuhn, but I must end the post somewhere. I will end it with a question for you.

I would eat Moorhuhn. When I eat chicken fingers, I now pretend they are Moorhuhn's fingers. And if you think about it, Moorhuhn is getting killed all the time. Might as well not let them go to waste!

[fairytales-and-folklore]

Some Things Should Really Just Stay In The Vault

Teen Wolf » Sterek

Title: Some Things Should Really Just Stay In The Vault

Author: fairytalesandfolklore

Fandom: Teen Wolf (Masterlist)

Relationship: Derek Hale x Stiles Stilinski

AO3 Rating: Teen & Up (a complete collection of author's notes, inspiration credits, content warnings and tags can be found on AO3)

Summary: "Stiles, you are not breaking into the secret Disney porn vault," Derek heaves a long-suffering sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose and rolling his eyes so hard he nearly gives himself a migraine. "That's not a sentence I ever thought I'd have to say, but here we are. This is my life now."

"Oh come on, sourwolf," Stiles snickers. "You can't tell me you aren't at least a little bit curious." "There isn't enough brain bleach in the world to scour the mental image of Mickey and Goofy doing the horizontal tango," Derek quips, a self-satisfied smirk twitching at the corners of his lips as Stiles barks out a laugh and settles back into the passenger seat. A few minutes tick by in companionable silence, and then Stiles is bolting upright, glancing over at Derek with a look of feigned innocence betrayed by the mischievous glint in his eye. "So…" he ventures with an air of casual nonchalance that fools absolutely no one. "You think they keep this vault on the premises, or—"

Read On AO3 | Read On Tumblr:

"—and we have to ride Millennium Falcon: Smugglers Run because, I mean, obviously. If I have the chance to pretend to be Han Solo for even a couple of minutes, I'm gonna take it. Except — oh shit — I might not actually get to be the pilot first time around, since the roles are assigned based on your position in line in a group of six, so we might have to ride it a couple of times, just to be safe," Stiles chatters away from the passenger seat, eyes glued to a never-ending scroll of article after review after shoddy instagram video as he regales a begrudgingly fond Derek with details about every single game, ride, and food court in the newly-minted Star Wars theme park.

Derek had been planning this surprise birthday trip for months now, ever since Disney had announced the date of the grand opening. He'd managed to keep it a secret from Stiles all of five minutes, until the snarky little shit had snuck up behind him for a tackle hug, saw him ordering the tickets, and screeched at a decibel only dogs should be able to hear. And though Derek isn't nearly as big of a fan as Stiles is, he has to admit that some of the attractions sound pretty cool (though he'll be pointedly avoiding the blue milk, thanks.)

Stiles is off on another tangent about how blue milk apparently tastes like a cross between coconut rice milk and a fruity hi-chew (and Derek thought butterbeer was too sweet) when he lets out a burst of laughter so sharp and sudden that Derek nearly swerves into oncoming traffic.

"I'm sorry," Stiles gasps in between peals of laughter. "I'm so sorry, dude, it's just— I just found out some absolutely golden dirty Disney secrets."

"Oh?" Derek prompts with a raised eyebrow, leaning over to glance at the post pulled up on Stiles's phone.

"Okay, so," Stiles starts, straightening up in his seat and launching into researcher mode. "According to the accounts of some of their former employees, Disney's got this weird rule in their artists' contracts — essentially, everything they create while under their employ, even in their off-time, belongs to Disney."

"That's shitty," Derek scoffs, lips twisting into a sour expression.

"It is," Stiles agrees with a quick nod. "But joke's on them, because apparently, a lot of the artists ended up drawing some pretty NSFW stuff in their time — all of it done in the classic animation style of the movies and tv shows they were actively working on at the time."

"Everything?" Derek asks with a scandalized quirk of his eyebrows. "Even—"

"Snow White? Aladdin? Treasure Planet? Little Mermaid? Beauty and the Beast? Mickey? Goofy? Yup, I'm afraid so. You name it, there's a high likelihood there's porn of it," Stiles confirms, ticking each one off on his fingers and casting Derek a sympathetic frown as his face pulls into an expression like he's just sucked a lemon.

"But get this," Stiles barrels on, unable to contain his glee. "Per their policies, they've got to keep every piece of art ever crafted by their animators. Which means that Disney owns an entire collection of erotic artwork inspired by all the family-friendly content they've ever created, locked away in a secret vault. A vault, Derek. Think about that. Think about how much porn would have to be created to fill an entire vault."

"I'd really rather not," Derek grimaces.

"Oh come on, sourwolf, that's fucking hilarious," Stiles snickers. "You can't tell me you aren't at least a little bit curious."

"There isn't enough brain bleach in the world to scour the mental image of Mickey and Goofy doing the horizontal tango," Derek quips with a sardonic sigh, a self-satisfied little smirk twitching at the corners of his lips as Stiles barks out a laugh and flashes him a dazzling smile.

With a contented hum, Stiles settles back into the passenger seat and leans his head against the window to marvel at the rolling landscape, sunlight and city skylines mirrored in his eyes.

But of course, the nice peaceful moment doesn't last long. A few minutes tick by in companionable silence, and then Stiles is bolting upright, glancing over at Derek with a look of feigned innocence betrayed by the mischievous glint in his eye.

"So…" he ventures with an air of casual nonchalance that fools absolutely no one. "You think they keep this vault on the premises, or—"

"Stiles, no."

"Stiles, yes."

"Stiles, you are not breaking into the secret Disney porn vault," Derek heaves a long-suffering sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose and rolling his eyes so hard he nearly gives himself a migraine. "That's not a sentence I ever thought I'd have to say, but here we are. This is my life now."

"Oh come on, Derek," Stiles whines, tugging at his shirtsleeve. "I'm not saying you'd have to break in with me. Just, you know…be the lookout."

"No."

"You'd go down in history as the best boyfriend ever," he coaxes in a lilting, sing-song voice.

Derek raises one very unamused eyebrow in Stiles's direction.

"Okay, yes, obviously you already are," Stiles amends, flailing his arms in a dismissive motion. "But come on. A smutty Disney heist? Best. Birthday. Present. Ever."

"I am literally already taking you to Disneyland."

"Yes, but—"

"No porn vault," Derek asserts with a ringing finality.

"Fine," Stiles concedes with a theatrical groan, slumping down in his seat and admitting defeat. But then a wicked smile curls across his face as he recalls one wild, wolfsbane-infused round of Fuck, Marry, Kill where Erica had gotten Derek to admit to a long-time crush on a certain smoldering Disney prince, and breaks out his wildcard.

"Shame, though…" Stiles muses with a melodramatic sigh. "I'll bet they've got art of Flynn Rider."

Derek's knuckles whiten against the steering wheel, the tips of his ears tinged with a delicate shade of pink as he has war flashbacks, remembering all the devastatingly embarrassing details of that night. Moral of the story: never drink tequila.

The cabin of the Camaro is quiet for a few long moments, save for the gentle whoosh as cars pass them on the freeway, and then—

"…his name is Eugene, and I'm not saying I'll do it," Derek grumbles, but one look at Stiles's Cheshire Cat smile has him sighing in defeat.

And that's how they end up with a lifetime ban from the happiest place on earth, escorted off the premises by two burly security officers who merely laugh when Stiles asks if he can double back to collect their special edition Han and Leia themed Mickey ears hats, which he'd accidentally left on the floor of the not-so-secret porn vault. Derek has to physically carry Stiles back to the car, because no less than five minutes after they'd been given the boot, he's already got one foot in the fence and a half-cocked plan to break in and get them back.

[yonpote]

do you feel like dnp fit well within your other interests, or are they oddballs that your brain kinda latched onto? -snoko

hmm kinda both but leaning more on the oddball side. honestly ive always been pretty embarrassed to admit im such a big fan of some youtubers bc all my other interests are really not like. well i was gonna say my other interests arent as deeply parasocial but i also watch twitch streamers lmao but thats still true, even tho i try my best to distance myself from creators while still enjoying their work, it's kinda hard to do that with dnp specifically bc their work is. literally them. i still feel that sense of embarrassment i think, bc enjoying dnp means getting into their personal lives to some extent, when thats not rlly the case for any other creators i enjoy.

so like, they fit in terms of like, i like youtube and streamers, i like queer content, i like gaming, but oddball in intensity and maybe methodology. but also oddball in terms of like. i dont really like any other fandoms most other phannies i know are in. i like mcr and other emo bands but thats basically it. ive talked before abt how it like, is kinda weird to me that a lot of phannies have "normie" interests which is just my mean way of saying yall arent into video games enough lol cuz dnp make a lot of video game references or say things where its like, idk something that i can understand but everyones like teehee i dont get itttt but bc i grew up on this 2000s-2010s Le Epic Gameur Otaku side of the internet its like a shock to me when phannies are like... only into kinda "normie" interests LMAO.

sorry long answer this is my longwinded way of saying: more of you need to enjoy freak things. get into an obscure band. draw your fursona. play weird cheap games on itch.io. read a webcomic no one talks about and then talk about it. play final fantasy XIV free trial today and join me (when i resub im broke right now lmao)

[sagethegremlin]

why couldn’t I have been autistic about like science or something useful and not. playing cards.

[dulcebot]

the sillies 🫵 WILL BE 🫵 in the sonic 3 movie soundtrack 🫵 TRUST!

[chiropteracupola]

the doctor is in...

[flintlock fortress is a collaboration with @dxppercxdxver]

[quirkle2]

i am literally so hungry and yet i am like paralyzed in my seat. why can't i get up and go get food. why am i just sitting here while my stomach wallows in agony. i feel ill. jay be normal

[clonewarsahsoka]

OH YEAH HERES THE STUFF I GOT ON THE WEEKEND (plus a closer pic to try and deal with the glare)

[marklikely]

whatever maybe im being too hard on him specifically maybe the other execs in that article are right that he's just an easy target because he's the one passing on changes from all of them. but even so what kind of insane defense is that. "no this one guy isnt bad at his job! the employees are just mad at him because hes the point of contact for the rest of us, who are all bad at *our* jobs!"

[scarlettfevor]

There's this guy whose channel is rly popular on booktube whose rant reviews of bad books come across my feed sometimes, but I refuse to watch any of them because 1.) I like how majority of the people in book related communities are women 2.) I hate men but most importantly 3.) I honestly don't see how you can make these 3, 4 even 8-hour videos about one bad book

[goblin-enjoyer]

Man I need to get a new mousepad soon.

[koling2345]

Simon with a young and soft girlfriend. NSFW

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・

Boyfriend! Simon who: Was completely whipped for you, would do anything you asked without question, he'd kiss even the ground you walked on, just say the word and he'll do it.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Bought a new cell phone just to talk to you, his old cubicle could barely hold a video call with you, and now he could finally listen to you chatting away with him every time he had free time. And.. You also sent him some really nice pictures, and he kept them all on his new cell phone for his own personal use.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Sometimes it took him a while to catch up with you in all your youth, not physically, but in your interests, hobbies, the games you liked, series you watched. He wasn't that old, but keeping up with everything you did wasn't that easy, but he tried to get into your vibe. Give him a few days, he'll soon have everything in a notebook, the game you're so excited about, he'll soon be talking with you about it. He makes a point of knowing something or other, just to get into your world, to make you happy.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Melted in place when you showed off your new hoodie, which had his name, 'Riley, written right across the chest. You looked so beautiful wearing an outfit with his name written on it, as if it were a ownership, and he was grateful that you wore the hoodie without any shame, proudly showing who you belonged to.

Boyfriend! Simon who: After listening to you nagging him all week to get a hoodie just like yours, with your name on it, he finally gave in and made one. Just like yours, it had your name on the chest, showing everyone what a couple you two were. As much as he thought it was corny to wear matching clothes, he didn't mind if it was with you. He even put a Kuromi print on his hoodie, since you almost cried for him to put something from Hello Kitty on it. Sometimes he hated this cat and her derivatives, but he did it for you. All for his princess.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Always bought things for you, every time he came to see you, he never came empty-handed. Were you on your period? He would bring you chocolates and flowers, along with your favorite snacks. Did you pass through a store and want to buy something? Well, it'll be at your house as soon as possible. If he couldn't bring it himself, you could be sure that the package would arrive at your house the next day. He wasn't petty, he had plenty of money to spend and he liked spending it on you.

Boyfriend! Simon who: When he went out with you, he wouldn't let you spend a penny, no matter if you wanted a simple ice-cream, he would pay for you. And if he saw your eyes glazing over at something you saw in the shop window, he'd go and pick it up with you. Every time you went out together, you always came back with several bags of shopping, along with the plushies you loved so much. Simon didn't even know how you were going to fit more stuffed animals into your room, with all the stuff you already had.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Is a complete gentleman to you, carries your bag, always takes his helmet off you, as well as before you get on his bike, he attaches the helmet in place himself. He's the type to take you on his arms, just to stop you stepping in a puddle of water and getting your feet wet. And if you're tired, he'll carry you like a princess all the way home without complaint.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Is quite jealous of you, you're young, beautiful, and you're with an old geezer like him. Although he recognized his own value, he couldn't help but feel a sense of possession over you every time someone looked at you with ulterior motives. As a result, he would always mark you on the neck, or put a hand around your waist, always putting a part of himself in you so that everyone would know who you belonged to.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Was a completely kind prince to you on the streets, but he would wreck you inside the bedroom. He loved that you were all submissive to him, always taking him so well, accommodating him as if you were made for it. Even if he opened you all up with his fat cock, your tight cunt would stretch to accommodate him, it was like heaven on earth.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Made you bend over all night, fucking you on all fours, your ass up while he admired the new panties you made such a point of showing off to him. 'Simon's' was the writing on the lace, just seeing you wearing it made his cock throb, he took several photos of you wearing the panties, as well as giving you a good spanking session while you were over his knees, just because you loved being his good little girl.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Recorded a video as soon as he had worn you out on the bed, pulling his cock out of you, to see the mess coming out of your pussy that was full, opening your folds just to see his cum running down your thighs. Your cunt full of him, leaking because he came so hard in you. It's not his fault, seeing you on your stomach, your panties written 'Simon's', you were begging to be fucked. And he'd love to watch the video he recorded himself, his time alone at the base would be lovely.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Had a photo of you on his cell phone, bent over his knee while wearing a short skirt and thigh-high stockings, ass up, pink lace panties. On top of that, a bright red mark on your ass, the mark of the slap he had given you minutes before taking the photo, he is very proud to use this picture, and he's not shy if someone caught it. In addition, the lock screen photo was of you smiling while wearing his famous balaclava, one of the few times he let you touch the mask. Not that he regrets it.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Knew he was going on a dangerous mission, he didn't know when he was coming back, or if he was coming back. So a week before going on said mission, he took a whole week to spend with you. No work, no nothing, just him and you.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Fucked you all week, on your stomach, bending over, missionary, cowgirl, on the wall, living room, bedroom, bathroom, table, floor. Any surface he could slide his thick cock into your folds was fine with him. He couldn't stand the sight of you bending down to pick something up, or when you wore his clothes inside the house. The sight automatically made his cock throb, hard as a rock to fuck you again, always making sure to fill you with his seed, to the point where it was leaking out of you. Only then is he sure that he's filled you to the brim, like a good boyfriend does.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Wasn't very good with goodbyes, so he fucked you all night, all night he had you in a missionary, that's when he wasn't burying himself between your legs. He filled you up so well that night, the bed was full of wet spots, your pussy as full as ever, he'd leave you leaking with his cum, mixing your mess with his, just to bury himself in you and start all over again. He was relentless. His job was done, since you slept like an angel that night.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Went out on his mission early in the morning, grateful that you were out like a light, covered in sucks and marks from last night, making him tempted to go back to bed and hold on to you. But he couldn't, so he settled for a kiss on your lips and forehead. His farewell was a handwritten letter, explaining the details and saying that he loved you very much and would come back to you. Even so, it wasn't enough to prevent the tears that fell down your cheeks when you found out everything.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Even though he was on the battlefield, he couldn't stop thinking about you, always trying to maintain some kind of contact, sending messages every time he had a second of time, and if it was possible, when he was resting, he would call you. Every time the mission dragged on, he felt a sense of dread in his chest. Simon couldn't have realized how important you were, and that scared him, because for the first time in a long time, he was afraid that he wouldn't be alive to finish the mission. He promised himself that if he made it out alive, he would ask for your hand in marriage.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Stayed in a very remote area, his cell phone didn't work there, and he had no way of communicating with you, and that killed him inside, not being able to know how you were. And you were worried to death, thinking the worst.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Came home after four and a half months, of those four months he spent three without being able to talk to you. So as soon as he got off the plane that brought him back, he went to your apartment, stopping first at a jewelry store to buy you a ring, and he spared no expense. You were going to be his wife.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Was all giddy about arriving at your house, preparing to give you a surprise. As well as coming back alive, he was going to ask you to marry him, get on his knees for you. Then he rang the doorbell, still dressed in his work uniform, the box with the ring in one hand, and your favorite flowers in the other.

Boyfriend! Simon who: Stopped dead in his tracks when he saw you after all this time. It wasn't just emotion, his eyes caught your form, wearing one of his shirts, which barely did the job of covering your swollen belly. Well, it seems, he wasn't the only one with a surprise.

[acepalindrome]

Alternatives to Squishmallow

So as many of you have probably already heard, Jazwares, the company that produces Squishmallows, is donating to charities that support Israeli soldiers and the IDF. They’re also supporting Canary Mission, which has been doxxing people who speak out against Israel. BDS hasn’t called for a boycott against them, but I can’t in good faith spend my money on their products, and I would strongly encourage everyone who enjoys plushies to really think long and hard about if you want to give your money to a company that’s helping support genocide!

But the holidays are coming up, and lots of us enjoy plushies and were fans of Squishmallow, and were planning to give Squishmallows to friends and family this year.

Fortunately, there are a number of great plushie companies out there, and I want to promote some of my favorites in the hopes that folks will get their plushie fix from a source that doesn’t side with Israel. So without further ado:

Fluffnest

Fluffnest got their start on Kickstarter a few years ago, and I adore the round shapes of their PuffPal plushies! My favorite is Pete the Possum, which is probably the best possum plush I’ve ever seen. I’ve also got a beautiful moth from their Kickstarter and I’ve been wanting their bats for ages. They also recently had a Kickstarter for an Animal Crossing-esque video game featuring their plushie characters and it looks fantastic.

Squishables

I can’t get over the plague doctor plushies. They’re so perfect and cute, and they’ve released other variations of them called Alter Egos, like a ghostly version, an alien, or a really sweet cottagecore one! They’ve got a ton of variety, but what I like the most are the fantasy plushies. There’s a lich! There are dragons and demons! Cryptids! Biblically accurate angels! A lot of really fun stuff!

Also they do a lot of great charity work! Right now they’re doing an auction for the Food Bank of New York City.

AfternoonFika

AfternoonFika is a very small business of only three people, but their plushies are extremely cute. They tend to sell out fast, so I recommend following them on social media to stay on top of any restocks! They recently released a line of dinosaurs that are precious, and of course I love their iconic cactus cat and cinnamon bun bunny.

Jellycat

Jellycat has been around since 1999, so they’re the oldest of these companies. They’ve got great designs, a ton of variety, and a lot of their plushies are made to be cuddled on and not just displayed. All three of my tiny nephews sleep with a different stuffed dog from Jellycat. My mom has a sun and several succulents that she uses as decorations. There’s a little something for everyone who enjoys plushies!

If you have any other favorite companies I haven’t mentioned, feel free to add on! I’ve enjoyed Squishmallows for a while now and I’m sad to see their leadership coming out on the side that’s committing war crimes on a daily basis, but this is a good time to discover new favorite plushie companies! And remember, money speaks loudly. Even if BDS hasn’t called for a boycott of Jazwares, it sends a message when sales start dropping for companies that support genocide. It’s a small thing, but the little things we do can add up!

[novy2sirius]

MOON HOUSE CORE © novy2sirius

trigger warning: suicide, violence, eating, hypochondria, trauma, mental health issues ♡

this is just a random post abt things ppl with these placements could experience ♡

these r only abt isolated placements so take it with a grain of salt bc the whole chart matters ♡

a lot of these r experiences i’ve heard from my friends and ppl who’ve purchased readings from me directly ♡

moon in 1h core

not being able to hide ur emotions bc they’re literally evident on ur face, youthful beauty, constantly changing ur outlook on life depending on how u feel at the time, getting told u look young for ur age, getting mad bc boys/girls call u cute instead of hot, mothering everyone, likes to be pampered and babied, throws child-like fits if lower vibrational, being a lot like ur mom even tho sometimes u don’t wanna admit it, even if ur a boy having emotional responses like a teenage girl, growing up with parents that had anger issues so now u have anger issues, being asked if ur sad all the time by ppl when ur not even sad it’s just ur resting face, having a comforting aura, ur mood instantly being ruined the moment anything makes u insecure at all, looking good in light blue and white outfits

moon in 2h core

having a cute voice, wanting to spend all ur money bc u had a bad day and r emotional, eating bc u’re emotional af, ur comfort place being a restaurant/fast food spot, having a wife who brings lots of stability to ur life, having a good singing voice, feeling emotionally connected to inanimate objects such as ur stuffed animal, not feeling happy around ppl who bring instability to ur life, spending all ur money on things related to music/food, love language is gift giving and physical touch, not feeling loved by ur partner when they don’t hug u every second, feeling more comfortable around ppl who share the same values as u, only having a good work ethic when ur happy, caring abt ppl more when they spoil u with gifts

moon in 3h core

being extremely charming and able to persuade others easily, having a rly soft voice and being told u sound like a child, being scared to do anything when ur sibling/a companion doesn’t come with u, feeling more emotionally connected to ppl u share similar opinions/interests with, being more talkative around ppl when ur comfortable and quiet around random ppl, posting emo stuff on social media when u were in middle school, having a lot of the same interests as ur mom, being close with ur neighbors growing up and riding bikes with them around the neighborhood and selling lemonade on the side of the road, being obsessed with romance books

moon in 4h core

playing house a lot as a kid, either being rly close with ur mom or having extreme mommy issues, being obsessed with self care related things and not being able to go to sleep without doing ur skin care routine, being emotional just by existing, coming off as emotional even when ur not emotional, feeling deep emotion for ppl and feeling attached to them and then realizing that they don’t feel the same way bc u’ve literally only talked for a week and u just have a problem with getting attached to ppl easily, feeling most comfortable with people that make u feel feminine, being a talented nurse or realtor, having a very nurturing aura

moon in 5h core

having a lot of hobbies that don’t involve leaving ur house, being hot, ppl always telling u that u have celebrity/star vibes, having a bunch of creative ideas but being afraid to share them bc ur shy, being insanely dramatic and then later regretting it heavily, being a good actor, contemplating killing urself every time u got grounded as a kid bc ur dramatic, feeling happiest when ur by the ocean or water, being a hopeless romantic, falling in love w cancer placements but wishing u didn’t, loving mango/citrus flavored foods/drinks, being scared of violent video games and wanting to play sims or minecraft instead, being rly good with kids/kids naturally loving u, growing up with egotistical parents, rewatching the same films/shows over and over bc they bring u comfort

moon in 6h core

being able to tell how someone rly feels even when they try and hide it bc u can analyze ppl rly well, loves animals and feels better when they have an emotional support pet, love language is acts of service and gift giving, having rly bad anxiety any time u leave the house (and in general) these ppl r huge homebodies, being a hypochondriac and thinking ur gonna die every time u have a single bad physical health symptom and googling ur symptoms then becoming even more worried bc google says ur abt to have a heart attack, chronic overthinker

moon in 7h core

being rly charming and having a lot of secret admirers, being scared to come outside ur comfort zone without a companion/partner with u, being fruity af, making ur friends/lovers order food for u bc ur too shy to, wanting harmony/peace and hating when someone argues with u or tries to start conflict with u but unfortunately still managing to attract lots of enemies even when u try to avoid drama, being able to negotiate with others easily, trying to be nice to ppl and killing them with kindness and u still end up getting hurt, being attractive to society but insecure abt ur looks, feeling sad if u don’t look pretty at all times, moving to live near ur bf/gf bc ur too attached to be in a long distance relationship, hates hookup culture

moon in 8h core

being sexualized a lot, ppl randomly confiding in u abt their traumas when u didn’t even bring anything abt it up, not being able to hookup bc you’ll get too attached, having a lot of family trauma that has now affected u emotionally and made u rly defensive any time someone talks to u in a slightly off tone, being a witch, doing love spells on ur crush so they’ll like u, having dark humor, feeling like u wanna die on ur period and going insane and acting like another person and then when u go off it realizing how dramatic u were, getting a boob job, being sent d*ck/p*ssy pics a lot without even asking for them, getting inheritance from ur family, getting surgery when u were young, spiritually transforming the most when ur alone

moon in 9h core

wanting to leave ur home country and never come back, trying to run away as a kid and packing a bag then coming back bc ur scared after only getting half way down ur street, adapting to ur surroundings quickly and easily being influenced by others, having a closer connection with ur grandparents than ur actual parents, having good ethics and not vibing with ppl around u who don’t, having ur first romantic relationship in college, feeling more comfortable around cultures outside of ur own or feeling more emotionally connected to cultures outside of ur own, cutting out ppl quickly when they’re negative and when they don’t support ur plans in life, having a thing for athletic boys/girls

moon in 10h core

having a star-like quality, finding comfort in being a workhorse and working all the time and using it as a way to distract urself from all ur problems in life, feeling like life is meaningless if ur not constantly going out and doing things, trying to keep things private but they end up getting out anyway, having a reputation of being a softie, feeling closer to ur dad than ur mom or having extreme daddy issues no in between, leaving behind a legacy that inspires others and touches them emotionally, being talented in careers that r an emotional outlet for u

moon in 11h core

having a very friendly aura and being able to socialize well but still sometimes having a low social battery at the same time, having a lot of influence on others and attracting a lot of ppl that r fans of u, being easily influenced and sometimes easily manipulated, having a lot of mood swings, being emotionally unpredictable, fearing being alone/dying alone and ppl abandoning u, being able to social network rly well, being closer to a step/half parent than a biological parent, throwing the best house parties, forming closer emotional connections online than in real life, being closer to ur online friends than in person friends, having a deep desire for someone to just care abt u and give u attention

moon in 12h core

having a lot of dreams that weirdly predict things almost perfectly, being obsessed with the feeling of nostalgia but also hating it at the same time, having an ethereal beauty, using astrology as a way to get an explanation for ur trauma so u can feel more validated, falling into a deep depression every time u run out of shows to watch, imagining fake scenarios in ur head abt rly bad things happening and crying over it when ur bored, looking like a mermaid/man, dwelling on the past a lot, being able to mask rly well and pretend ur someone ur not and doing it sm to fit in that u don’t even know who u r anymore, struggling with mental health issues ever since u were a child and feeling like u were sad even as a kid but not knowing why, hearing ppl talk randomly when ur abt to fall asleep but no one’s there, having a lot of hidden enemies that u may have had a close emotional connection with before that end up stabbing u in the back, feeling alone even when ur not alone

comment if u want more of these 🗣️

[foldingfittedsheets]

My best friend growing up was a matter of convenience over compatibility. The boy across the street was only a year older than me. We had some common interests but our personality types were a terrible clash. I remember fighting with him just as vividly as any peaceful activity.

We were stuck in the same boat though. There was no other kids to socialize with except our odious older brothers, and being together was slightly less wretched than being alone. Most of the time. Our parents joked that we were like an old married couple, always fighting. We’re both gay now.

His family was better off so he brought more toys and video games to the friendship table. My family had more land so we had animals to play with and secret forest clubhouses. We hung out most days but he refused to acknowledge me at school for the sin of being both a year younger and a girl.

He was a terribly sore loser though. When playing fighting games he’d win four out of five rounds but if I won the fifth he’d turn the console off before letting my character do a victory dance. I was fairly prosaic about this. He liked to play them and I went along. When I won I got to suggest other activities.

Now, I mentioned we both had older brothers. His older brother was only three years above him. They scuffled in a normal sibling manner but the older brother was cognizant that he was bigger and stronger and these fights were more what I would characterize as fencing. There was rules and treaties in place.

My older brother was five years older than me. When we fought it was a no holds barred pit fight. I went absolutely feral. Significantly younger and weaker I unleashed my greatest weapon which was absolute berserker tactics. I bit, scratched, went for the balls, I was a menace. I paid no heed to any injury done to me if it let me land another strike. Most of our fights ended in a stalemate of me pinned or him bleeding too profusely to continue harassing me.

I never considered that I was getting more fighting experience than my friend. When scuffles broke out between us without a controller in hand I won every time. He’d jokingly smack me and we’d go down in a ball of flying hair and monkey screeches, but I always ended on top.

The trouble was, I found, that afterward he was no fun at all. His fragile childhood masculinity couldn’t take these defeats from someone younger and more female than him and he’d always sulk home afterward. I didn’t care for that, especially because fighting him was much more fun than my horrible brother.

Then one day I found the secret. I’d whapped him far too hard upside the head and he began to cry immediately. Full of guilt I whimpered that he’d really hurt my knee. He stopped crying. He hurt my knee? Then we were even! He’d hurt me just as badly and therefore the fight was a draw.

I was delighted by this logic. Every fight thereafter I saw no shame in playing up some injury he’d dealt me retroactively. I had no pride to lose and shamelessly acted beaten to avoid hurting his feelings. Our fights were milder as a result, and we both went away feeling elated by the childhood violence rather than defeated.

[dcxdpdabbles]

DCxDP Fic Idea: Online Siren

Danny makes a mistake. Or maybe he struck gold. Depending on the perspective you were looking through.

It starts one night when Sam, Tucker, Danny, and Jazz get together for a private party on Tucker's birthday. Mr. and Mrs. Foley had let them have the whole house to themselves on the agreement that it would only be the four of them. They would be keeping an eye on the security camera and motion detectors around the property. At the slightest hints of Tucker having a house party, the pair would return from Mr. Foley's sister's house to shut it down.

The group of teenagers were more than happy not to invite anyone. It's not like anyone would show- at least not with good intentions. They had an entire night plan- coffee drinks based on their types, video games, boardgames ones, painting hour, karaoke, movies, and cake after presents.

They all pitched in for pizza, and Sam offered to buy everyone breakfast in the morning. The party started at four and would end at ten the following morning. The boys would sleep in Tucker's room while Sam and Jazz crashed in the guest room together.

Danny hadn't had that much fun in such a long time that he didn't even shy away from Sam's video camera while singing. The youngest Fenton has always had a fantastic singing voice, but his stage fright has stopped him from showing off his skill in front of anyone who was not close friends or family.

The following morning, while eating at Tucker's favorite breakfast restaurant, Sam checked her phone after noticing all the buzzing. Danny could catch her face turning pastly white at whatever was on her screen. She taps aggressively, nearly frantically, which gains the attention of Tucker and Jazz.

"Sam? Everything good?" Jazz asks gentely.

"I..no..I'm sorry, Danny," She whispers after staring hopelessly at her screen. "I meant to save it in our private share, not...the anonymous one."

"What?"

"I...post poetry anonymously on this voice website. It's audio recordings only." She explains, placing the phone on the table. Her voice is hesitant. "Last night....I accidentally posted the video of you singing from the Karaoke machine I saved. The one from the Realms. And some of my followers saved it and shared it. It's trending."

Danny feels his stomach drop into his legs. "What?"

"No one knows who you are!" Sam blurts as Tucker quickly pulls out his own phone. A few seconds later, Danny's voice blares out of his speaker, the melody blending well with his singing. The Karaoke has a recording option that deletes background noise, making it far more professional than four teenagers dancing around the Foley's coffee table.

"Dude, this sounds amazing," Tucker says after a moment. "I can't believe I finally have a recording of your singing. Just look at these comments!"

The song is an open domain in the Infinite Realms, telling the tell of the first King's fall. It's rather popular for its revolutionary themes and near musical lyrics that blended with the rapid flute melody, so finding a ghost willing to share a Karaoke version took nearly no effort. People online think Danny was the songwriter.

The song on Sam's page had ninty-thousand listens, with just as many downloads- each download places ten cents in her account. So far, Danny's singing has made nine thousand dollars. It's only been twelve hours!

It got so much traction because Damian Wayne had made an edit with a popular anime and posted it on his personal account. His small usage had exploded Danny's song in only a few hours.

"Take it down!" Danny hisses, slapping a hand over Tucker's screen and glancing at nearby tables. "Sam, please take your post down."

"I did! I swear! But it's too late to stop it from spreading on the WorldClip." She tells him, and Danny's heart feels like it will explode until Jazz gently speaks up.

"Sam, can Danny have those nine grand?"

His best friend blinks momently, thrown by the question before she nods, "Of course! It's his money."

"Hmm." Jazz taps her fingers under her chin before turning Danny's face towards her. It's not until her gentle pats on his back that he realizes he is hyperventilating. "You should post more on that anonymous website. Sam can write the songs, Tucker can make the music, and you can sing."

"What!?" He choked, shocked she would even ask him. Tucker and Sam are eyeing them with wide eyes, frozen in their seats. No one knew where the fear had come from, but the two knew how badly Danny reacted to the idea of performing.

Tucker first met Danny when the boy panicked in the music room. After it was announced, the students would be singing Twinkle Little Star in the first grade. It was the first time Tucker had ever called nine-one-one, too.

He was praised as a hero, while Danny was scolded for overreacting. Tucker had held his hand until the sobbing boy's parents came to pick him up and has never left his side since.

"Danny, this fear has always left you in shambles. I think it would help you. This could be a form of exposal therapy," She says, then shrugs her shoulder. "Think about it. No one will know who you are, but your music could reach thousands without you ever having to show your face. You could pay for the college you wanted to go to in Gotham this way. All of you."

Neither Danny's nor Tucker's parents could afford to send them to Gotham University despite it being their dream school. Sam's parents refused to pay for a "useless" degree such as Botany. They had been growing uneasy with the realization dreams were not always promised as the end of the senior year approached in only a few short months.

They would never ask it of him, but Danny could see the genuine hope tucked in their eyes as they waited for his response. He licked his lips, feeling his heart still beating a mile a minute under his rib cage.

He didn't like being this paralyzed by an irrational fear. He also really wanted to help them reach their dreams.

So Danny opens his mouth and whispers, "Only until we can get to Gotham to find jobs"

Jazz's smile is bright.

________________________________________________________

A few months later, Damian practically runs Tim over in his rush to connect to the game room's surround system. Jon is hot on his heels and has the decency to shout an apology as the pre-teens rush by.

"Hey! Watch it!" He still screams at their backs, irritated. "I could've dropped my croissant!"

"Sorry again Tim!"

"You're fat anyway, Drake!"

Tim rolls his eyes, adjusting his hold on his plate as Dick rounds the corner that the children had appeared from. "What's got them rushing?"

"Online Siren just dropped a new song." Dick laughs. "Dami is a bit of a fan."

"Online Siren?"

"That's right, you were in space for five months. Online Siren is this anonymous singer that everyone is going crazy over on the internet. He's an amazing singer, but because no one knows anything about him. Not even Babs."

Tim raises a brow. "He could be using autotune."

"Maybe, but Tim, I'm telling you. Listen to his music, and you'll find you can't stop. Siren is a fitting name."

"He can't be that good," Tim mutters, following his eldest brother into the game room, where Damian and Jon have blared the speakers to the loudest setting and dancing around.

Tim draws up short at the sight of Damian Wayne actually crying as he sings along to the lyrics, acting as if the singer was right there in front of him and he was a long-time fan.

Then, the music invades his ears, and Tim feels like he is ascending on a different plane. The smooth, near silk-like voice glinds into his chest, rattling his bones, and his knees shake when the man holds a soft, seductive "Oh" for a few seconds longer then necessary.

It sends shivers down his spine.

"What is this!? It's so good!" He screams at the dancing Dick, who laughs.

"I know, right!?"

"It's too good. I think this is a real siren." Tim continues, pressing his hands over his ears. His mind flashes back to the few months he spent with his team, running for a mind-controlling alien that had nearly trapped them in the third space sector. "Dick, we're in danger! Get around from the speakers! Mind control!"

Dick stops dancing with a sigh, muttering under his breath as Tim rushes to the control panel of the speaker system. As soon as he slams it off, Damian releases a screech of an angered cat and launches at him, demanding his music back. Jon flouts nervously on the side as the two youngest Waynes brothers roll on the ground, yelling insults and taking dirty shots.

"I wish I could enjoy things with my siblings without them ruining it." He mumbles, striding forward to break up the fight, only to scream when Tim pulls out pepper spray, yowling like a madman.

"Mind control! Mind control!"

"My EYES! "

"Drake, stop!"

"You'll never get me Siren! Never!"

".I'm going to go get Mr.Wayne!"

"Make haste, Jon! Bring my father to stop this baffoon-my eyes! Drake, you bastard!"