#and all my doctors have agreed I've been on them long enough going off would hurt more than help)

[thelastspeecher]

Oh also btw anyone who saw my posts last week about my heart doing the two-step and I wound up at the ER don't worry I'm not like. Actively dying.

But I WILL be having a follow-up with my cardiologist and probably some more testing done yaaaaaay 🎉

[anachronismstellar]

What about Wei Qingwei? 👀

hehehHEHEHE WHO IS READY FOR SWORD PUNS-

-----

"Thrity percent."

"Ten percent."

"Twenty five percent."

"Five, and if you keep pushing, I will give you nothing at all." Shang Qinghua slammed his book closed, the threat like a sharp knife being held over Wei Qingwei's dreams of a new forge.

"The Immortal Allience Conference is coming soon, I need a new forge to make new weapons," Wei Qingwei said as if his argument couldn't be refuted. Better start sooner than later, right? Even stubborn Shang Qinghua couldn't find fault in a point like that!

"Wei-shixiong," The An Ding Peak Lord rubbed his hands all over his face, smearing ink on his cheek as he gave the biggest sigh Wei Qingwei ever seen someone give. "I understand your frustration and your anxiety to start things now, believe me, I know," Shang Qinghua gestured at his entire desk, a chaos of papers and parchments, some of them covered in numbers so tiny it hurt Wei Qingwei's eyes to look at them for too long. "But as you can see, everyone wants a head start, and as we have discussed, many times I may add, the Immortal Allience Conference budget will be given next year. And is no one's fault-" Then he paused, mumbling something suspiciously like "but your own", only to continue with a smile. "That your disciples blew up a forge. Again."

Wei Qingwei crossed his arms, tapping his fingers. It annoyed him to no end that his lie had been caught before he could use it, but something nagged on his mind that the money wasn't actually the problem here.

He had heard... Stories. You see, blacksmithing could be really boring. When you're waiting for a new ore shipment, or when one had nothing to do besides polishing metal (hehe) again and again, what one could do besides gossiping? And the last big whisper among his older disciples had been too good for him to ignore.

Long night meetings with Zhangmen-Shixiong, visits at odd hours to a certain bamboo house, doctor's appointments in the middle of the night while being perfectly healthy... One had to be stupid to not connect the dots.

The quiet as a mouse, shadow of twelve peaks, Lord Shang Qinghua fucked. And he must be pretty good at it if the types like Yue Qingyuan and Shen Qingqiu came back for more.

Another thing that wasn't hard to see was how stressed the man looked. To be honest, Wei Qingwei doesn't remember any time Shang-shidi was not stressed. Maybe it was because they met only during meetings. Or when he went to ask for money. Hm.

What Qi Qingqi said? Something something vinegar and bees and honey? Maybe he should try another strategy.

"This one would like to apologize to his Shidi for the insistence. But maybe I could bid on a final offer?" And Wei Qingwei didn't curl his finger on his hair because he wasn't that shameless, but he wasn't ashamed to pull his sleeves up to show off some muscle, leaning forward to let his outer robes slide just enough to show his clavicle.

Shang Qinghua stared.

"Very well, a final offer," he agreed and then proceeded to pretend to organize his desk, taking a glance or two at Wei Qingwei's neck.

"Shidi goes back to his first ten percent advance deal," Now Wei Qingwei knew he was laying on too thick by Shang Qinghua's snort. Still, he didn't back off, winking as he said: "and I can craft something special for you."

"Hmm..." Shang Qinghua moved more papers around, pulled his collar as he took another peek at Wei Qingwei's chest. "I do have some projects in mind that would require Wei-shixiong's expertise..." He hesitated for another moment, slowly laying back until his back hit the panel behind him, one of his hands going to his sword, playing with the tassel like a cat about to catch a mouse. "Also, it's been a while since I've polished my sword. Would Wei-shixiong consider putting that in his offer as well?"

The next day...

"I swear to Heavens, your hair is possessed by something. What did you do to make it so knotted?" Qi Qingqi was being delicate, mind you, she would never be less than gentle, but she also couldn't resist pulling the curls a little bit stronger than she would. Served Wei Qingwei right for making her spend an entire morning taking care of his curly creature.

Also, Wei Qingwei's dreamy sighs were starting to annoy her. He was acting worse than her teenage girls!

"I went to talk to Shang-shidi yesterday," he said as if he wasn't almost vibrating to share how did it go.

"And?" she rolled her eyes, pulling her comb just enough to make him hiss. "By the look on your face he agreed on giving you more money."

He started laying back on her, but before he could ruin all her hard work on the lower part of his hair, she hit him with the comb. And it was a testimony of how smug he was that his only reaction was to laugh, eyes creasing into two half moons, smiling like a sly fox.

"He gave me something alright."

She stopped mid movement blinking once then twice, mouth opening in a surprised gasp.

"You didn't."

"Oh I did."

"I can't believe you did it."

"I can't believe how huge is his-"

"Stop!" She hit him again with the comb, and then a second time. She didn't need that image in her head the next meeting, thank you very much!! "Shut up! I don't wanna hear it!"

"Ow, ow, alright I'm sorry!" He apologized but kept laughing, no, not laughing, giggling like he were about to kick his feet and start making plans for a wedding.

She loved him, but. Ew.

"How is he that good?" She wondered out loud when they finally calmed down and went back to controlling Wei Qingwei's hair. "He looks like he's about to faint half of the time, and the other half, he's crying about us being mean to him."

"I have no idea, but he's growing quite the reputation. But it does make sense after you think about it. And!" This time she couldn't hold him in place, Wei Qingwei turning around so she could see him wiggling his eyebrows. "Explains a lot why a lot of lords were blushing last meeting. You know the voice he does? The bossy one?"

She dropped everything to cover her ears, closing her eyes as well so she couldn't even read his lips. "I don't wanna hear it!!"

That send Wei Qingwei into another fit of giggles, throwing his head back while covering his face with both hands.

Qi Qingqi didn't understand, honestly she didn't want to understand. But her best friend was having fun, so if she sent a blessing on Shang Qinghua's way, that was between her and the Heavens.

------

Aaaaaand Wei Qingwei had his turn! :D I wanted to make it more naughty but I'm at work and djahskfjskdks Everyone here knows English so- LETS JUST SAY I WORKED ON MY POKERFACE TODAY

Bonus points for Qi Qingqi!! :D

There you go anon <3 I hope you enjoyed!! Also, the demon curly hair Wei Qingwei hc is from @artsarasp comic here!!!

[fuzzythoughtsblog]

I've been craving some Alpha/Omega play which has caused me to be thinking about how much I want to be coerced into letting an Alpha "help" with my heat after I've pushed everyone who's tried away. Which lead to this fantasy :

Like always in this fantasy I'm in a program for disobedient wayward omegas. However this time Im having a persistent heat, one that I can't shake by myself. And despite the programs efforts, they can't manage to find a Alpha that can subdue me long enough to take me in my feral and fearful state. To add to the mess none of the tranquilizers they've been feeding me has calmed me down.

Due to the failed efforts the people of the program are starting to lose hope in taming me. That is until a college graduate and prodigy who majored in Omega psychology and physiology volunteers to help. The female Alpha read a paper on my case and had been intrigued.

She goes to the program and asked the doctors how I've managed to fight off all the other Alphas.

"She's cunning for Omega pretending to submit with a kiss only to bite their tongues, busting a light bulb above a Alpha suitors heads and scratching through the cuffs of the breeding bench. "

"Hmm I like her. How long has she been in heat?"

"She's been in heat on and off for about 4 months but it's usually only for 3 days at a time. This is the first time she's been in this state for a more than a week, 2 weeks in fact. "

"Aww poor baby! Her body knows what she needs. *sigh* Poor stupid omega trying to think with her brain. Turn on the air condition, get me soft blankets, pillows, plushies, and t-shirts, her favorite snacks and drinks, lots of water bottles and condoms. Despite how satisfy it would be to breed her body needs to balance out after we get her off her heat. "

The doctor agrees and with in minutes she's outside my door with a wagon load of stuff. I imagine I can smell her through the door causing me to already be on high alert before she walks in. As the door creeks open and she rolles the stuff in I sink further back into the corner. She then closes the door before turning to me.

"Hi Angel."

At her words I begin to take a defensive stance.

"Uh uh none of that Omega, now I've brought you some things."

I slightly peer over at this statement.

"Things for your nest. "

Slowly I scoot a little from the corner and look at her confused.

"I know sweetheart, the program has a misconception of you. They say only good girls get to make their nest. But you my angel are a good girl. "

I shutter at the praise that washes over me. Still I don't move from the spot I've settled myself in.

"*sigh* it's ok Omega here. " she says as she begins to throw the blankets, pillows and plushies cautiously over to me. "See you don't have to move yet. "

Slowly while keeping my eyes on her I gather the blankets pillows and plushies.

"Go ahead baby, I'm not going to touch you while you make your nest."

I continue to look at her before slowly switching working on my nest and looking at her. However soon I'm consumed by the process. This blanket is the based, these the walls, the plushies go here and the pillows lines the blank walls and... I stop as I pick up a T-shirt smothered in her scent. Slowly while checking to make sure she's not paying attention as she scrolls through her phone I take the shirt. And put it up to my nose letting out a quiet moan as I take in her scent. I look back at her to check again. She's still scrolling. I quietly begin to look for more t-shirts finding 2 no 3 and then the holy grail a T-shirt stained with her cum. I whine at the sight before looking over to her only to find her eyes starring back at mine. Her eye's making the heat in my stomach burn hotter.

"Aww did you like your present Angel. It's all for you, in fact I have more presents, you must be so hungry Omega after all the doctors said you've been laying there curled in a ball for hours just touching yourself. " she says while pulling out some snacks and drinks.

Setting them in the middle of the room, still closer to her than before.

I try to convince my self I'm not interested, that it's all a trap but she's right I am hungry. With such precautions I step closer to her and the food closer and closer. Before grabbing a bag of gummies and a bottle of lemonade and bolting back to the safety of my nest.

"Good Omega, eat. "

I look away as I tear into the bag and take the occasional chug of lemonade.

"Good Omega, such a good girl. Look at my pretty Omega in her pretty nest the best one by far. "

I begin to feel a twinge of pride at her words. The praise getting to me starts to go lower. As I feel a little slick run down my leg the scent meeting the air causing the alpha to take a deep breath in. To my dismay I begin to glare at her once more.

"Now Omega stop that. We both know what you need and it's not more food it's this " she says as she pulls her leggings down letting her cock flop out.

Again I start to back up.

"Now now angel I'm not going to force it. "

I look at her eyes full of doubt.

"Truly I'm not, but then again I don't have too. You know how good of a mate I am. Deep down you know, I can take care of you. " she says taking steady steps toward my nest

"I can give you everything thing you need, food, shelter what ever you need... Pups. "

I let out a long whine at the statement. As she approaches me closer.

"That was a good response Omega, is that what you want? My pups inside of you. Oh you'd look even more beautiful. "

I begin to close my eyes and hold my hand over my leaking pussy as she kneels down to my level.

"I know it's hard to say it baby. But I already know. " she says before gentle grabbing my chin making me look up at her "I know what your body needs. "

I begin to shake my head no as she leans in a kisses me letting out a deep moan as she does. As the kiss continues she deepens it sticking her tongue in my mouth before moving her hands down to my nipples. Only breaking the kiss when she's fully on top of me.

"Delicious, sweet but sour like Kiwis and lemons. "

I can even begin to push her off as I'm left panting from the kiss.

"I wonder if your whole body tastes like that. " she says as she leans down and leaves dark hickeys on my chest moving further down to my nipples her mouth only adding to the heat in my stomach as I double over with pain. Looking up at her for help.

"Ssh I know baby I can help you. " she says slightly pulling away from me allow her room for her hands to trail down to my unclothed cunt.

I gasp and bite my lip as her fingers lightly ghost over my already sensitive clit.

"Aww look at my girl, her clit is swollen all ready. Did you play with it that much?" She teases still moving her fingers.

"The doctors told me you didn't use any of the penetration toys they left for you, are you scared of it? The stretch? "

After a minute of her waiting patiently i slowly nod.

"It's okay angel your body can take it it's what it's for." She says rubbing her fingers up and down my slit as I try to squirm away to no use.

How did I let this happen I think to myself. Especially as she starts to sink a finger inside of me.

"See it went in with ease. " she proves by fucking her finger in and out.

Watching intently as she moves her finger in and out. After a while she puts her mouth to my clit make me squirm. Distracting me as she sinks two more fingers in.

"See sweetheart, you take it like a champ. Such a good Omega"

She begins to set a fast pace fucking her fingers into me with earnest. Stretching and kissing my cunt in the process

"Such a good fucking girl! " she says as she herself becomes more and more undone. "So fucking wet for my knot. Practically begging for it! "

She says before pulling her fingers out and lining up. As tears of fear run down my face.

"It's ok, shhhh, your good." She whispers in my ear as she sinks inside me.

I let out I whine as she just keeps going, when am I going to hit the base?

She groans "So fucking tight, warm and tight! "

Then finally our hips met. As tears continue to drip down my cheeks.

"See dumb little Omega, you took it so well."

I continue to sob as she runs her fingers through my hair before pulling out and slamming back in to my dismay.

"Ssh it's okay I'm gonna mold this pretty cunt to the shape of my cock and your going to lay there and take it like a good girl. "She whispers as she sets a brutal pace for my already heat wrecked little body.

Causing me to whine and gasp with each thrust. However, despite my original dismay the original pain from my heat starts to evaporate with every pound. I breathe a sigh of relief until my Alpha - no the Alpha reaches down and plays with my clit causing me to scream more.

"That's it baby make so noises for me. Fuck you get even. Fucking. Tighter. I have to keep you! " she announces as she leans down towards my neck.

Causing me to flinch away and whine.

"No baby, this is happening! I'm going to claim you and your sweet body and your going to lay there and milk my knot! " she states grabbing my hair to give her better access to my neck.

All while continuing to pound and rub as she attempts to make me ready for her knot.

"Good stubborn girls like you need structures, an Alpha. And I'll be that little Omega. I'll give you everything that you need discipline, pleasure, punishment, protection, pups and most importantly I'll love you! " she says so sweetly before sinking her teeth in and shoving her knot in as I moan.

Pleasure and satisfaction begins to wash through me as I feel her cock leak into me - no a condom. I let out a displeased sound at the realization.

She laughs "I know baby, don't worry I'm going to breed that cunt nice and full when the doctors clear you. "

I groan but accept her words as she our bond knot still locking us together. I purr as she runs her hands through my hair. Hearing the door open but paying no mind as this Spacey pleasure continues to flood my mind.

"Ah doctors, nice timing. Did you enjoy the show? Anyway my mate needs actual food before I take her home with me. " I vaguely hear the Alpha state before the door closes.

I continue to live in the pleasure that is till the knot goes down and my Alpha tries to pull out. I whine and grab at her.

"So needy, good Omega let go allow me to give you everything." She says before getting me in position to be taken again.

[illsuiteddowner]

@unclejackworthing

It was Arthur's fault for getting too comfortable. Jack was in the kitchen trying to figure something out while Arthur waited in the living room. Jack was only a room away. He got too comfortable.

When the knock on the door came, he nearly jumped out of his skin. He was in no state to entertain company. He was wearing someone else's pajamas and covered in bruises after his last encounter. But when he he hesitated too long, he heard a voice through the door:

"You'll want to cooperate, of course. It's a matter of your health." Arthur looked through the window and made direct eye contact with a doctor. Another one was behind him, difficult to mistake when they were dressed almost identically in the same odd fashion sense common among Wellington Wells' medical community.

Arthur's heart sunk, but he put on the best smile he could and opened the door. He tried to keep his body mostly behind it. "Gentlemen! Lovely day for it! Now what's all this about a medical emergency?"

"Yes, well, you'll forgive the intrusion, but my colleague and I happened to be wandering along when caught your scent through the window. It's ajar."

Arthur looked at it again. Indeed it was. Why did every little thing have to go wrong? The doctor pushed past Arthur into the living room, then turned to face him, so Arthur had a doctor on both sides.

"And, when we'd sniffed you out, then we couldn't help but notice that peculiar pungency telltale of one off their Joy." The doctor smiled, his creepy little mustache curving up at the edges. "So of course we both agreed it was our medical duty to come remedy the situation."

"Oh, dear!" It wasn't difficult to look horrified. It was harder to to look like he had nothing to hide. "Silly me! Has it been that long since I've popped a Joy? I'll take one straight away. I'm so thankful to you for warning me, Doctor." Arthur kept turning between the doctors, unsure which one to face. "And, uh, Doctor. Jolly decent of you."

"Yes, we'll administer a dose presently." The doctor leaned close, peering at Arthur with one fish eye. The one behind Arthur--he was getting them mixed up now--took a noisy sniff of Arthur's neck. "Are you certain you don't need more extreme medical intervention, sir? You do seem to be rather beat up."

"Oh, not at all! That's why I'm at home in my pajamas, you see. Silly me, I tripped down the stairs and the doctor put me on strict bed rest until I've healed up."

If only smiling hard enough would make them believe him. His cheeks were starting to hurt. "I've been going crazy here at home instead of at work. I'm sure the Joy will help with that." Arthur tried to step out from between the duo. "I'll just step away and go take care of that right now. I shouldn't waste another minute."

The doctor behind Arthur grabbed his upper arm and wrenched him back in place. "You'll forgive us for wanting to take you back to the office just to be sure. It is a matter of your health, after all. You can't be too careful."

"Oh, pish-posh!" said Arthur desperately. "I'm as healthy as a horse. Just some light bruising."

"I think that's for a qualified medical professional to to decide, don't you think?" The doctor in front of Arthur produced a rather large syringe as the one behind him held Arthur's arms. "But first there is the matter of your Joy. I think you'll be much more agreeable once the proper dosage is applied.

The doctor came in close and tilted Arthur's head up to expose his neck. He ran a finger along the vein he chose and then stabbed the needle into Arthur's skin, fully compressing the plunger and emptying the pink liquid into Arthur's bloodstream.

"Shit," said Arthur. His legs had suddenly stopped working correctly. He collapsed into the doctor's arms. Too much Joy.

[marvelsdc22]

Home For The Summer

Intro: Hey guys! Its been a hot minute since I've posted an actual story on here, I've been having severe writers block and have been going through a lot recently, but I managed to make some time and write something, I hope y'all enjoy! And thank you to @wokeupinawalnut for the assistance in creating this :) love you <3

Summary: Melissa is your mom's best friend, she's become someone you looked up to and could come to for anything, what happens when feelings start to change and your mother turns ruthless?

Warnings: Potential trigger for alcoholism, verbally abusive behavior, reader is 23/24 by the end(let me know if I missed any)

Word Count: 3k

You had known Melissa since you were thirteen, your mother had brought her over after a long day at the school, the two of them having become friends earlier that year when you and your mother had moved here after your mother divorced your dad, who was no longer in the picture, getting the second grade teaching position at Abbott. Melissa had then become someone you looked up to and could confide in when your mother wasn’t around to listen, which happened more and more the older you got.

When you turned seventeen, you started seeing Melissa in a different light, you started to feel things for the other woman that you knew wasn’t right to feel when it came to your mother’s best friend, but you couldn’t help yourself, you found your gaze on her everytime she was around, quickly averting your gaze when you saw her turn your way, you figured this was just one of those stupid crushes, hell you hadn’t even been on a date yourself, no one interested you enough to get that far.

You had hoped that going away for college would change your feelings for the fiery redhead, getting a decent scholarship to Stanford for their medical school, ever since you were given the opportunity to volunteer at the local hospital, you had your heart set on becoming a doctor so when the opportunity appeared, you took it with no hesitation and immediately accepted the offer you had received.

The day you left, your mother was supposed to drop you off at the airport and see you off, but instead you had to call Melissa last minute when your mother told you she was unable to, grateful that she agreed with no hesitation, loading your bags into the bed of her truck before climbing into the passengers seat, you a bundle of nerves and not just from flying away for school.

The ride was silent aside from the quiet music playing through the trucks speakers “You doing alright over there, kid?” Melissa asked, lightly nudging you with her elbow and causing you to jump slightly, having been lost in your thoughts and looking at her after a moment, furrowing your brows before sighing “Nervous and a little upset that my mom isn’t willing to take the time to see her only child off” you admitted, wringing your hands out in your lap, freezing when she rested a hand on one of yours “It’s her loss, you’re gonna do amazing, I know it might not mean much coming from me, but I’m very proud of the person you’ve become and who you’re going to be, kid” she said, squeezing your hand and you felt tears building in your eyes as your stomach flipped and your heart pounded, the praise making you feel lighter “Thank you”.

When you got to the airport, you expected Melissa to just drop you off at your terminal but she took the turn for the parking garage instead, her taking you the whole way through until she couldn’t follow you anymore “C’mere” she said, pulling you into a tight hug and rubbing your back as you buried your face in her neck “Let me know when you land, I’m gonna miss you so much” she said, giving you one last squeeze before pulling away “I will, I’ll miss you more… Thank you” you smiled, squeezing her hands which you were still holding before turning and heading through security, heading for the next phase of your life.

xxxxx

Little did you know that Covid would hit and hinder any and all travel plans you had, keeping you trapped in California to the point you just never visited, not like your mother cared, you were lucky to get a message from her a day, let alone a phone call, you finally found time during your fifth year, you finally had a small break in classes that you were able to come home for the summer, you still kept in touch with everyone, especially Melissa whose been with you through it all, the nights you were stressed out from all the studying? She was a phone call or facetime away, when you were excited about something that just happened? She was there, as the years went by though, you felt something change between the two of you, she seemed to be more flirty when it came to talking to you, but maybe you were overthinking it all and your brain was twisting what was really happening.

I just landed - You

Just found a parking spot, I’ll see you shortly ;) - Mel

You stumbled slightly when you saw the emoji she chose to use, why would she use that one? Was she trying to hint at something? Here you go again, overthinking, she didn’t mean anything by it, you heading for the baggage claim and waiting for your bag to come on the conveyor, fixing your mask as you scrolled through your phone, you didn’t trust planes when it came to this virus, so you’d rather be safe than sorry, you glanced up when you caught a glimpse of what seemed to be your bag, barely able to set it on the ground before you felt arms wrap around you, causing you to tense before you saw the red hair and smelled her usual perfume, turning in her grasp to return the hug just as tightly.

“I can’t believe you’re home” Melissa said softly, pulling back and cupping your face as to get a better look at you, your heart stuttering before you rested your hand on one of hers, lightly leaning into her touch and missing the flash of adoration in her gaze as you closed your eyes “I’ve missed you” you said softly, looking at her once more before you took a step back and grabbed your suitcase, her still holding your hand as she led you through the airport “I missed you more, your mother has been getting on my nerves without you there for buffer” she laughed, glancing back at you and smiling when you let out a giggle “Not surprising, she doesn’t have me to annoy”.

The drive to your mothers house was quiet, the familiarity of the ride calming as she drove you guys through the busy city “You hungry? That sandwich shop is on the way” Melissa said, breaking the silence as she glanced over at you, catching the smile that appeared on your face at the suggestion “When do I ever say no to that place?” You laughed, throwing her a grin before you relaxed back in the passengers seat, feeling more at home than you have in a while.

When you finally got into your mothers house, it felt different, everything was moved around, it didn’t look like the house you had finished growing up in “About a year after you left, she did a whole renovation of the place” Melissa told you as she followed behind you with your suitcase that she insisted on bringing inside, watching as you took in the new layout, a little lost but it was your mothers house and she could do what she wanted with it.

Heading back to your room, you stopped in front of the closed door; would it be changed too? Your mother wouldn’t do that… right? You so lost in your mind you didn’t notice Melissa looking at you worriedly, opening her mouth to say something when you pushed the door open, the two of you freezing when it was a basic room, not at all how you left it “I didn’t know she did this” Melissa admitted, knowing that she would’ve warned you if she had known, anger evident in her tone and looking at you when you released a shaky breath, setting your suitcase down and tugging your arm so you’d face her “Oh hun, c’mere” seeing the tears building and pulling you into her without another word.

Later that night, you were waiting for your mom to come back, having asked Melissa to give you some time to yourself after she helped you calm down, needing time to figure out what you were going to say to your mom about changing your room without notifying you first, startling when you heard the front door open, your mom staring at you in slight shock, she must’ve forgot or wasn’t paying attention when you had told her that you were coming home for the summer “What are you doing here?” She asked, irritation evident in her tone, it feeling like a knife was dug into your chest at the harsh question “I only told you three times that I was coming home for the summer” you said, watching as she set her things down and kicked her shoes off, basically brushing you off as she headed for the kitchen.

Getting up and following her into the kitchen, you watched as she dug around in the fridge, completely disregarding the food that was on the stove that you had made and was keeping warm until she got home “There’s food on the stove-” getting cut off when she slammed the fridge door closed “What do you really want, Y/N?” She asked, crossing her arms and watching as you started wringing your hands out, a habit you had developed over the years when you got nervous or stressed out, both happening right at that moment.

“I saw you changed things… it looks nice” you started, gesturing to the living room behind you which was decked out in new furniture “Why didn’t you tell me that you were changing my room too?” You asked, feeling yourself start to shrink back under her sharp gaze that seemed to analyze everything about you “I don’t need your approval to change things in my house” she stated, raising a brow when you let out a frustrated sigh “I know you don’t, but that was my space, it would’ve been nice to know-” “You don’t live here anymore, you are no longer my responsibility nor do I want or need you, so do us both a favor and get back on that plane and leave me alone!” She shouted, pushing past you and heading upstairs, you noticing this time just how much she reeked of alcohol, a door slamming jarring you out of your shock.

With tears in your eyes, you ran out of the house, ignoring the fact it was raining as your legs carried you to a familiar destination, ending up at Melissa’s front door, tears running down our cheeks and soaked to the bone, the minutes between knocking and her finally opening the door feeling like an eternity, feeling a rush of relief when she finally opened the door in a comfy looking shirt and sweatpants, her hair a little everywhere indicating she had been asleep and a bat in hand, making you idly wonder what time it really was “Mel…” you choked out, more tears slipping out.

“Y/N? What the hell? Get in here-” setting the bat to the side before pulling you into the house and shutting the door behind you “-you’re soaked, let me grab you a towel” she said, turning and rushing down the hallway, returning quickly and wrapping the towel around you before pulling you into her arms “Shhhh… tell me what happened, hun” she whispered, holding you tighter when you let out a choked sob into her chest, letting you take the time you needed to explain what all went down, her heart breaking at the fact your own mother treated you the way she had.

After you explained everything to Melissa, she led you to her room so she could give you some fresh, warm clothes to change into “I’m sorry I woke you up” you apologized, watching as she pulled one of her eagles shirts out and a pair of sweats, her setting them on the bed before going over to you and cupping your cheeks, wiping a stray tear away with her thumb “Don’t apologize, I would rather you wake me than go wandering around in this weather… go change, I’ll be in the living room” she said, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead before leaving the room, closing the door behind her to give you privacy.

When you came back into the living room, you felt your face start to burn when you caught her smiling at the fact you were in her clothes, watching as she set her phone down and patted the spot next to her, tugging you closer when you sat on the other end rather than next to her “You are free to stay with me as long as you need, do you need anything before I head back to sleep?” She asked, wanting to make sure you were taken care of before returning to her room, smiling and patting your leg when you assured her you were okay, pressing a kiss to your head before she headed back to her room.

About an hour later, you got up to head to the spare room for the night when you saw something light up on the coffee table, looking over and seeing Melissa’s phone still sitting there, catching a glimpse of a message from your mother on it.

If you care so much about them then you keep them… - Y/M/N

That small bit that you could see without unlocking the phone was enough to twist the knife that was already buried in your chest, taking a deep breath to steady yourself before returning Melissa’s phone to her room, moving carefully as to not wake her, plugging her phone into the charger and setting it on the nightstand before turning to sneak out, making it to the end of her bed when your pinky toe caught the end of the bed “Shit!” You muttered, collapsing to the floor and holding your foot in pain.

Melissa jumped up when she heard the thud and quickly turned the lamp on before she turned and saw you on the floor “Are you okay, sweetheart?” She asked, helping you up and having you sit on the edge of her bed “Yeah, I was heading to bed and noticed your phone was still on the coffee table so I wanted to put it where it belonged and my toe caught your bed” you admitted sheepishly, watching as Melissa fought hard to not laugh but a small chuckle slipped out “Well, thank you for returning it-” picking her phone up and seeing the message “-what did you see?”

Dropping your gaze to the floor, you messed with the strings on the sweatpants “Enough” you shrugged, taking a shaky breath “She’s not wrong, I’m not important and I don’t deserve anything-” trailing off when her hand firmly gripped your chin and turned your head to face her “Stop that, you deserve everything and your mother is stupid for not realizing that” she said, lightly running her thumb along your bottom lip “Anyone who gets the chance to love you will be the luckiest person alive” she said, her eyes drifting to your lips before meeting your gaze once again “Mel…” You whispered, feeling an imaginary pull between the two of you.

“Can I kiss you?” You asked, locking eyes with her for a moment before realizing what you had just said “I’m sorry, I don’t-” you stuttered before her lips cut you off, stealing the remaining words you had before you melted into the kiss, the two of you pulling back when breathing became necessary, resting your foreheads against one another “I’ve wanted to do that since that night you went to that party and sent me that selfie” Melissa admitted, that having been the night you went to a party last summer, it having been a small one with some classmates, you having sent her a selfie to make sure you looked good, you had wondered why it had taken her so long to respond.

You smiled as you looked at her “Really? I’ve had a crush on you since I was seventeen, I thought it would go away when I left for school… Obviously not” you admitted, reaching over and tucking some loose red strands behind her ear, smiling into the small peck she gave you “We should get to bed… we can talk about this more over dinner?” Melissa suggested, tugging you a little closer by your hips “Dinner sounds wonderful… I’ll see you in the morning?” You asked as you stood, stopping when she grabbed your hand “Or you could sleep in here? If you’re comfortable with that of course” smiling when you nodded and let her tug you onto the bed next to her.

The next morning, you woke up to the spot beside you cold but the smell of breakfast being made and the sound of soft jazz playing from the kitchen, groaning, you forced yourself up and out of Melissa’s bed, making your way to the kitchen and smiling when you saw Melissa standing at the stove, humming along to the music, already dressed for work, this being the last week of school before summer break “Smells good” you smiled, heading over to her and cautiously wrapping your arms around her from behind, unsure what you could and couldn’t do with her, smiling and resting your chin on her shoulder when you felt her lean back against you, the tension releasing from your body.

“I figured you deserved something homecooked” Melissa smiled, pressing a kiss to the side of your head, enjoying this downtime with you “So, I have to work, but when I get back we can go get your stuff from your moms, get you settled here then dinner at this new restaurant that just opened up” she suggested, looking at you when you extracted yourself from her and stole a piece of bacon off the plate, to which she smacked your hand away with a laugh “That works for me, I’ll be here” you said, munching on the bacon.

After Melissa left(after many many kisses), you busied yourself with doing dishes(which was a pain to convince her to let you do) and cleaning up until Melissa got back, taking you to your mothers house who was thankfully nowhere in sight(Melissa had ripped her a new one when she saw her at school) before heading back to Melissa’s, the two of you splitting off to get ready, you wearing your nicest top you had in your suitcase and the nicest pair of pants you had, sadly you didn’t think to pack nice shoes so you were stuck in your vans, checking yourself in the bathroom mirror one last time before heading into the living room to wait for Melissa.

When she entered the room, your jaw dropped, her red curls were down and hanging over her shoulders, her black dress showing off her curves just right and her heels completing the look “Close your mouth, you’ll catch flies” she teased, pushing your chin to close your mouth “Are you sure we need to go out for dinner? I got a whole meal right here” you said, shocking yourself as she smirked “C’mon, I promised my baby dinner, you can have dessert later” she winked before leading you out, the promise being fulfilled as soon as you guys got home, you knew this summer and the next several were going to be the best summers of your life.

[lucy90712]

Road to recovery- part 8

Masterlist

Part of me was hoping that the hate would slow down a bit but of course it didn't. Every time I checked any form of social media all I saw was people posting about how much they didn't like me and assuming that I'm only friends with Pablo to gain something. I thought I'd be able to handle the comments but I just can't there has been so many more than I thought there would be and people have said such hurtful things about my appearance and my character. Pablo keeps apologising and asking if I'm ok and I just keep telling him I'm fine which is a bit of a lie but I can tell he already feels bad enough I don't want to make him feel worse by telling him how I really feel. The worst part about it is that everyone seems to be drawing attention to the things I was already insecure about which hasn't helped my mental state at all.

Today though I have a chance to cheer myself up a bit as I have a big check up with my doctor to see how my recovery is progressing. I think it's going pretty good so hopefully he agrees and says something positive as that would really lift my spirits. I've been nervous about the appointment today as well which has really made the last few days even more challenging on my mental health but I'm trying to stay positive as I know wallowing in sadness and anxiety won't do me any good. 

Alonso came to pick me up a bit before my appointment; when I got in the car I expected him to tease me about everything that happened with the game this weekend but he didn't instead he asked if I was ok. I was going to lie to him too but because he's my brother he knows exactly when I'm lying so I had to tell him the truth. It was kind of nice to get all of my feelings off my chest and Alonso was really supportive and gave me some good advice. He's been through things like this before with getting hate for his performances out on track so he told me to just delete the apps off my phone for a bit that way I'm not tempted to look at what people are saying. In fact he stole my phone and did it for me as I think he knew I probably wouldn't do it myself. 

Once I had my phone back I went into the hospital on my own leaving Alonso to wait in the car for me. The wait for my appointment wasn't long at all and then I went in and was immediately taken for some new scans to see how everything was healing. After scans I was subjected to a load of tests on my range of movement, how much weight I could put on my leg and how much pain I was in. The testing was rigorous and honestly quite exhausting as it's been a long time since I've done this much movement with my knee but for the most part it felt good. After I had done everything the doctor left for a while to review it all and look at my scans which left me just staring at the wall hoping to hear good news. Just as I was daydreaming the door opened again and the doctor came back in, his expression was impossible to read which for some reason filled me with a few more nerves.

"Ok Lola things aren't progressing as we would like them too internally you aren't healing as quick as we thought you would and your movement isn't at the range we would expect it to be" he said 

"What does that mean?" I asked holding back tears 

"For now it doesn't mean too much this can happen as we can't always accurately predict how quickly people will recover but we will set another one of these appointments in a few weeks and if we aren't seeing improvement you may need a second surgery so that we can see what's going on" the doctor explained 

"Ok" was all I could manage to say 

"I know this isn't what you wanted to hear but don't let it discourage you if you keep working hard you won't need the surgery" he said 

We scheduled my next appointment and that was as long as I could hold it together. All of my emotions that I'd been holding onto for the last few days came out all at once, as soon as I left the hospital doors I burst into tears and I couldn't do anything to stop them. I made my way back to where Alonso parked but before I could get into the car Alonso had got out and wrapped me in his arms. He tried to get me to stop crying and tell him what was wrong but I just couldn't he tried everything to help me all of which had worked before but today nothing could stop me. Eventually he gave up and let me get in the car so we could go home because right now all I want is to just go home and get to grips with my emotions as I clearly have a lot to process. 

As much as my eyes were filled with tears I could tell that Alonso didn't take the turn to take me back to my place which meant he was going to take me somewhere in hopes of cheering me up. I really didn't want to go wherever it was he was planning to go but I was sobbing too much to tell him to take me home. We went a bit further before the car stopped and I looked round a bit as at first I didn't recognise where we were but then I saw Pablo's house and realised we were just down the street. I should've known Alonso was going to bring me here but this is the last place I want to be I don't want Pablo to see me like this. I knew we said we would help each other out but I know for a fact Pablo is doing better and I know he's in a better place mentally and I don't want to ruin that by projecting my problems onto him that wouldn't be fair. 

Alonso had to practically drag me out of the car and down the road which was rather easy for him as I'm not strong enough to put up too much of a fight. We walked down the street to Pablo's house where Alonso left me to ring the doorbell, part of me was hoping that he wouldn't be in even though he said he had no plans today. Of course after just a few seconds the door opened and I locked eyes with Pablo who straight away rushed over as quick as he could and wrapped me up in his arms. I wanted to stop crying but for some reason I only cried more once I was in Pablo's arms it was like he made me feel safe enough to truly let all of my feelings out. Pablo said a few words to my brother before taking me inside and allowing him to leave. 

Pablo took me to the sofa and allowed me to settle into his embrace with my head buried in his chest so he couldn't see my tear stained and probably red and puffy face. His hand was gently stroking my back trying to calm me down while he whispered comforting words in my ears. It wasn't anything special what he was doing but hearing his words and feeling his hands on me did wonders in helping calm my emotions which I didn't have any control over. As my tears began to slow down Pablo kept rubbing my back and he even wiped some of the tears from my face that he could reach as I was still hiding most of my face. I never would've thought he would be so good at comforting me I mean he's always so hyper and full of energy I never imagined that he'd be any good at keeping calm and radiating that onto others but clearly he is. Once I had completely stopped crying and my breathing was getting back to normal Pablo put a hand under my chin and got me to look at him.

"Can you tell me what's wrong I hate seeing you so upset and I want to help" he said 

"The doctor said my knee isn't healing properly and I might need another surgery if things don't get better" I said still sniffling slightly 

"I'm sorry that sounds awful but that's not the only thing on your mind is it" he probed further 

"No that's it" I lied 

"Don't lie to me please just tell me what's wrong I'll do whatever I can to help and I won't judge you you know that" he said 

Damn why doesn't he have to be able to read me like a book.

"Ok I've been getting a lot of hate since we were seen together at the game and it's been getting to me a bit I thought I could handle it as I'm used to criticism but I can't some people are just so mean" I admitted letting a few more tears fall 

"I knew it was getting to you people on social media are assholes because they don't feel the consequences of what they say but none of what they say is true" he said 

"But they keep talking about how I must be using you or how I don't deserve to even be friends with you which that part is kind of true" I rambled 

"No it's not true I can't even imagine what my life would be like without you I love spending time with you just because you aren't famous doesn't mean you don't deserve to be friends with me and despite what they say I know you aren't using me I know you would never do that" he said 

"And before you say anything all of the things they say about your appearance aren't true either you are beautiful inside and out and they are just jealous" he added 

Hearing him say that put a smile on my face. Pablo has never really complimented me before he's told me my outfit was cool a few times but he's never called me beautiful so hearing it made me feel a lot better about myself. He must've noticed that I was finally smiling again as he told me I looked pretty when I smiled which only made my cheeks heat up but luckily my face was already red from crying so Pablo probably wouldn't have noticed. Although I kind of wish he knew how he made me feel because as time goes on it's getting harder and harder to hide my true feelings from him. 

Pablo's POV

The pain in her eyes just shattered my heart. She's been my rock throughout every step of the way so far so to see her breakdown right in front of me really hurt. This whole time she's been the strong one never letting anything get to her but finally it's caught up with her and part of it's my fault because we got seen together at the game and now people are tearing her apart and one person can only handle so much. I feel so awful that I'm part of the reason she's so upset but knowing that I can be there for her and calm her down makes me feel a bit better. When she arrived she was hysterical and her brother told me he couldn't get a word out of her so he wanted me to try so that's what I did. I'm not very good at keeping myself calm at times let alone other people but I tried my best and after a while of just rubbing her back and whispering to her she calmed down. It felt good to be the one to help her because she's done so much for me that anything I can do to even remotely repay that I'll do in a heartbeat.

Hearing the way she criticised herself as well it pained me. She's the most beautiful and kind person I've ever met so to hear her say that she thought she didn't deserve to be friends with me hurt but what hurt more was to see that those horrible people got to her and made her feel insecure in herself. Throughout the time we've known each other I've always wanted to tell her just how beautiful she is but I've refrained as I know once I open the flood gates there's no going back. Once I start complimenting her I'm scared that I'll let my feelings show but today she needed it so I knew I had to take the risk. Seeing the smile that my compliments gave her made the risk feel worth it though as I'd do anything to keep her smiling 24/7.

Looking into her eyes as she smiled and blushed at my words made me feel some type of way. I've felt something for her since we first met and I've kept those feelings repressed until now but I don't know if I can do it any longer. She's just the most perfect girl I've ever met and I don't want to lose her whether that be to another guy or to the fear of what us being friends might mean for her. I have to tell her how I feel in hopes that as long as she feels the same way it gives her a reason to stick around even when things are tough like they are right now. As scary as it is I have to take the risk. 

[analogwriting]

Star-Crossed

Chapter 17: Sydän

Donquixote Rosinante x gn!reader word count: 2.7k a/n: i tried my best to make it kind of actiony ;a; there should be a lil bit more in the next one lmao first|next

The plan was straightforward and simple enough to remember. Sneak in to the underside through your secret entrance, slowly take them all out one by one and replace them with your own, and then take the front side of the hospital.

You knew you couldn't make a detailed plan. There were too many unknown factors. One thing that made everything easier was the fact that your underground staff were willing to come back. You had been worried that they hated you for disappearing on them, but each one of them had been more than overjoyed to hear from you. 

Each one of them had shared the same vision as you; to help people regardless of where they came from. You had expressed that things would change from here on out, that you wouldn't be helping anymore members from any families unless they were looking to get out of there or if children were involved. None of them had an issue with this change, in fact, a lot of them agreed. Seems the events had changed a lot of people’s views, not just yours.

It probably helped that most of these staff had been the same as you - former members of families that renounced all that long ago. You hadn’t realized until now just how well you had chosen for your elite staff.

Now that all that had been settled, you were still dealing with an overly worried Corazon - not that his feelings were invalid, this was a dangerous heist you were carrying out. At any point you could die, not that you would. If you were sure of anything, it was at least that.

You had persuaded him to temporarily move into Pops and Marco’s place. He had let it slip that Doflamingo had his other place on surveillance, so he had taken the boys and moved to his hideout that he had way back when. He mentioned that it was near the spot where you had first met him.

You talked him into bringing the boys and staying at Pops’ house until things blew over. Pops’ place was one of the safest places in the city. He had fantastic defenses, even if he couldn't fight much anymore, people would have quite the struggle breaking into the place. Marco said that it was awful trying to sneak out when he was a teenager because of it too. He was fully convinced on the few times he actually succeeded, Pops had just let him pass.

Pops had said he knew every time he snuck out. He let Marco get away with a few, but most of the time he would catch him and then let him go anyway. As long as he wasn’t getting involved with any of the families, Pops didn’t really care what he did.

“Are you ready?”

You were leaning on the railing of the back porch, looking out to the garden. You looked up, seeing Corazon stepping out and lighting a cigarette. You walked over as you noticed his shoulder started to catch on fire. You patted it away without even flinching. He hadn’t even noticed it until you had put it out and there was soot on his shoulder. “You really should stop smoking.” You frowned, almost pouting. 

Corazon sighed. “I know, I know. It's unhealthy.” He was grumbling, having heard from just about everyone in the house at least once. You were honestly surprised he hadn’t stopped smoking yet. He was surrounded by doctors and nurses now, you’d think he’d quit. Though, plenty of people in the medical field smoked fully knowing the risks.

“No, so it's easier for me to do this.” You snatched the cigarette out of his mouth, took him by the collar, and kissed him hard. You crushed the cigarette in your hand. You didn’t really care whether or not the man smoked, it wasn’t your job to baby him. You were his partner, not his parent.

Corazon only chuckled, wrapping his arms around you. “I think that's the most compelling case I've ever been faced with.” You smiled up at him, tossing the broken cigarette in the trash not far from the two of you before idly dusting the soot off his shoulder from the fire.

“To answer your question, yes. I'm ready for this to be over.” You sighed, wrapping your arms around the man before you. “I'm ready for all this to be over. For things to go back to normal.” You paused, a sly smile crossing your face. 

“And I'm ready to absolutely make that ass mine,” you teased, one hand moving to squeeze his ass. He yelped a little, his face turning a bright shade of red and you cackled. He buried his face in your shoulder, grumbling something you couldn't hear. 

“Hm?” You moved him, cupping his face so he'd look at you. “What was that?”

His face was still red and he pouted slightly. “I said, I'm more than ready. You keep riling me up but all these people are making it impossible for us to remedy anything.” 

You looked at him before laughing and kissing him again. “You're too cute. Don’t worry - you’ll get your reward soon enough.” 

After that, you headed inside with him. It was about time to go. 

--

You met up with your staff members at your secret entrance in the tunnel. After a small mini reunion of exchanging sentiments of how much you all missed one another, you went over the plan one more time. 

Man, you owe them so much right now. You were going to treat them to a fancy meal and plenty of vacation days - gift baskets for everyone. You couldn’t even begin to express how much you appreciated them at this moment. 

Infiltrating was easy for the most part. When there was only one secret entrance that broke off into several exits across the underground part of your hospital, it made things easier - made being stealthy easier.

Since your office had all the cameras, you decided to start there. You peeked inside, noticing two guards watching the screens. You pulled your gun out of your waistband, only it wasn't exactly a gun but a tranquilizer. You had also made sure to put the silencer on it. Couldn't have any unnecessary attention drawn to you. You also didn’t want to actually kill anyone. You switched professions for a reason and you were going to make a point to not kill anyone during this heist.

Within moments, you knocked the two of them out. One shot to the neck for each was enough to make them pass out on the ground. You sent in two of your own, your staff quickly swapping clothes with the guards and standing in position while you dragged the two unconscious bodies back into the tunnels to another staff member who was to tie them up and keep an eye on them. 

When you were working with your staff, it was like a well oiled machine. You started by sneaking in through every exit and taking out the closest people, replacing them with your own, and tying them up. The plan was to start on the outskirts of this side of the hospital, work your way in, then take over the other side. 

It was tedious, but necessary. 

Eventually, you had replaced every guard that was near the entrances, now you were going to have to do a bit more sneaking around. They didn't have a ton of people on this side of the hospital, just as you didn't. Which, you assumed they would considering this was the side they were the most excited to have. That was the selling point of your hospital and why so many people had wanted it.

Someone was approaching you from the back. You could tell by the path they were taking, they were probably going to grab you by the shoulder and try to spin you around to punch you.

As you predicted, you felt a hand on your shoulder as you advanced down the hallway, grabbing the person behind you and pulling them forward and slamming them on the ground before shooting them with your tranquilizer. 

One of your staff moved quickly, dragging her off to one of the many exits to the tunnel. You took a deep breath, closing your eyes. Damn, this was irritating. You just wanted all this to be over and be asleep in Corazon’s arms right now.

“Sneaking around, are we?” You froze, your entire body tensing.  However, since he hesitated and you weren’t one to, you spun around, taking out your silenced gun and firing off two shots.

Doflamingo was on his knees, holding his arm, his gun scattered across the floor. “You bastard,” he ground out. You kept your gun trained on him. You had shot his hand again and his arm, rendering it pretty useless right now.

“If you wouldn't have said anything, you would've been able to get me.” You shook your head, clicking your tongue. “Your ego must've gotten in the way.” Though, you were somewhat surprised to see him here right now. “What are you doing here anyway?”

“Well, this is our hospital now, so why wouldn’t I be here?”

You stared at him with a deadpan expression. Riveting stuff. “Crazy considering the hospital is still technically mine.”

“The hell you mean by that?”

“Eh, unimportant - doesn’t pertain to you. Anyway.” You trained your gun on him again.

“I could make a call right now and have people filing in here and take care of you. I’d be careful with your next movements.” Was he really trying to intimidate you right now? If he made a single noise, you could shoot him with no problem.

“Except that your staff is currently tied up and have been replaced with my own.” You watched in amusement as his face fell, realizing the situation he was in. It didn’t last long, the man’s pride too great to show weakness.

He glared at you over his glasses. “Well, do it already. Kill me.” 

You began to walk over to him, going around him so you were behind him. “I think that's the easy way out.” As much as you would love nothing more than to take him out right here and now, he needed to pay for shooting Corazon point blank. He had been fully ready to kill his own brother. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.

So, you were going to make him wish for death. 

You knelt down, gripping the back of his neck with your free hand while pressing the gun into his lower spine. “I could snap your neck to a degree where you'd be a complete vegetable for the rest of your life.” You heard his breathing stop for a moment, was he experiencing true fear? Good.

“Or if you promise that you will never come near my hospital or Corazon ever again, I will only take your legs.”

“How is that fair at all?” He turned to look at you and you squeezed his neck slightly, making him stop in his movements.

“Well, it's either live with no movement or live with some movement. Take your pick.”

He just stared at you in horror. He could tell you weren't playing around. In this moment, he could see exactly why people had been so terrified of you. You showed no mercy, you didn’t play games. You could be cold, calculated, and heartless. You weren’t proud of this fact. You hated it, actually. You were just lucky it came in handy in moments like this.

“Make the choice before I make it for you.” Your eyes narrowed. You were aching to strangle him to death and watch the life slowly leave his eyes, but you also couldn't let yourself go that far. As much as you wanted to, you couldn’t. You wanted him to suffer, not for him to have a cop out.

Doflamingo watched you for a long moment as if testing to see if you'd actually do it. When you tightened your grip on his neck, his eyes widened. “Fine, fine! My legs. Take the legs,” he grumbled. You had already known the choice he made, it was clear which he should, after all. 

A slow, sinister smile spread across your face. “Thank you for your cooperation Mr. Donquixote. Don't worry, you're in excellent care.” You used the best customer service voice you could muster up before placing your gun towards the lumbar region of his spine. 

“Pleasure doing business with you.” You lowered down to his ear. “This is for shooting my boyfriend.” Then you fired your gun, covering his mouth with your other hand in the process to keep him quiet.

--

After your little encounter with Doflamingo, you turned him over to the care of your staff. He had passed out from the pain, having three bullet wounds by the end of your encounter. You made sure to have your staff keep an eye on him and keep him sedated. You didn’t need him making a ruckus. 

You’d let him go once things were over, but for now you’d keep him under surveillance. Though, not like he could do much. What’s he gonna do? Crawl outta here?

The rest of the first half of the heist went off without a hitch. The entire underside of the hospital was now back under your control. All of Doflamingo’s men were currently knocked out and tied up in the tunnels, your staff slowly working on taking care of them - not killing them, but definitely making sure that they’d never mess with your hospital again. You somewhat left devices in the hands of your staff, after all, some of them had their own personal vendettas against them. You weren’t the only life they’d fucked with.

You walked into your office, trying to debate on how to handle the next half. You looked at the cameras, taking note of all the people who didn't belong. You knew your staff on both sides of the hospital. You knew who didn't belong. 

It also seemed like most of your father's people on the front side of the hospital. Did Crocodile pull out of the alliance? What was up with that? You weren’t entirely sure, but you didn’t have time to dwell on it. 

As you looked at the cameras, your heart slowly sank. You knew most of the people that you were going to have to deal with. They had been your own family at one point too. It’d taken a village to raise you and most of them had a part in it. You still couldn’t believe they had all been in on it.

Was nothing real? Was anything genuine? At least in some families, connections were there, but there seemed to be nothing in yours. Loyalty was supposed to be important to families, but it seemed that it wasn’t in your father’s.

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath. Now wasn’t the time to spiral.

“What's the plan, doc?” You looked over to one of your staff. “We wait until shift change tonight. There won't be as many staff members or patients, so we'll be able to operate more stealthily.” You looked back at the screens, thinking. 

“Considering this took up most of the day, we should only have to wait a couple hours max.” It was evening time by now. You had already told Corazon and everyone that you probably wouldn't be back until tomorrow. This was going to take up a lot of time - and it has thus far. You knew they would all be worrying about you, but with how things were going, you'd make it back in time for breakfast. 

At the same time, it all felt too easy. Sure, you ran into Doflamingo, but that didn't even hold you up hardly at all. 

You decided to not think about it for now. “We should keep our guards up. It felt a little too easy.” Your staff nodded. “By the way, Stacy brought lasagna and we’re all eating in the conference room if you want some.”

You blinked, processing his words. You couldn’t help but laugh, only your staff. You stood up, deciding that you should probably eat to keep your strength up. You also had two hours to kill, so might as well spend time doing something. next

[kaesaaurelia]

In which a daring space pilot divebombs the Great Red Spot of Jupiter against the advice of his doctor

Not sure how I'm going to be posting this fic or writing it because it's coming to me in disconnected chunks, but here's the first(ish) scene of my 3rd Life space colonists/terraformers AU.

character designs & concepts

main AU tag

The fact that Grian comes to him first is absolutely lost on Scar. What isn't lost on Scar is that he's about halfway to lightspeed when he gets the ping, and he doesn't see any reason to slow down to talk to Grian. He can say pretty much anything to Grian, because whatever he says, all he's gonna get back is --

"Scar, what are you doing?"

Grian's voice is shrill and terrified, and his transparent hands grip some invisible desk or railing or something in front of him. It's very funny how frightened he is, especially since he's not even really here in person. He'd probably be loving this if he was here in person. "I was just thinking about how I missed Europa, so --"

"Pull up, pull up!" Grian shouts.

Scar does, and watches the white-blue moonscape fade into the distance. "Did you want to call back later?" he asks Grian's hologram. "Is this a bad time?"

"You almost didn't miss Europa," Grian tells him, looking slightly green.

"But I did!" says Scar. "Anyway, I would've landed in the water, it would've been fine."

"Is… I… it's been a while since I took physics, but I don't think that's how it works, Scar," says Grian.

"So! What brings you to my lovely, um. Short vacation to the Jovian system? That's definitely not on the clock? I definitely put this on the calendar as a day off," says Scar, trying to do that now, but the nearest company servers are too far away to ping him back before he starts to get a headache.

Grian sighs. "Did you read that thing I sent you? About the expedition they're considering sending me on? They haven't chosen pilots yet." He's… "skimmed" would be putting it generously. Parts of the Table of Contents look neat, though. And Grian wouldn't have thought of him if it wasn't a good fit. "Oh yeah," he says, "it looks great."

"Okay, good," said Grian, sounding surprisingly relieved. "I thought you might be put off by the -- well. Anyway. I'll tell them you're interested."

Scar is about to thank Grian, and go on about his day, when that last little bit of conversation echoes in his brain. "Put off by the what?" Scar asks.

"You said you'd read it!" Grian says.

"Oh, well, I lied," Scar explains cheerfully.

"Scar, please read the thing before you agree to it. It's not -- it's farther than we'd usually be --"

"Do you think it'd be dangerous? Are you advising me to do something dangerous, Grian?"

Grian makes an indeterminate noise that builds into a "…nnn-maybe?"

"Is it going to be fun?" Scar asks, diving towards the Great Red Spot, to see how close he can get to the thing without hitting it.

"Scar!"

"Still waiting on an answer to my question!" he says, continuing to fall planetwards. It's safe enough to skim the atmosphere, as long as he doesn't get too close to the Spot, but they've started to set drifting automated helium farms loose all over the rest of the planet, and those are way more annoyingly jangly to crash into. Also, they blow out a lot of hydrogen, so sometimes they explode.

"Scar, just. Just read the thing before blindly signing your entire life away, it's all I'm asking. It's not much."

"Fine, fine," says Scar. He would roll his eyes if he could. Instead, he accesses the file and feeds it right into his brain. It's not the same as reading it, but now all that information is bouncing around in his noggin like a confused bat. But probably smaller. Scar is unclear how big bats are, now that he's thinking about this. "How many bats do you think would fit in a skull?" he asks Grian, who has been his go-to expert on skulls for a very long time.

"What?" Grian asks. Scar assumes he has heard the question right, and just doesn't think much of it.

"Anyway, as you can see I've accessed your silly little packet and it looks great." He likes the shape of it, anyway -- it's an extrasolar terraforming mission, full of promise, and exploration, and... promise... again.... Specifically, very generous promises the company has made about money and land and so forth.

And, if this all goes well, they'll be able to go to the planet, establish a base there, and establish a cheaper, easier, and more permanent way of traveling between the the Sol system and this new place. Then they can either return to the lives they had or go right back through the portal to their new home where they will live happily ever after, frolicking among its green fields and forests. That part is probably what Grian's worried about -- not the frolicking, the part where if everything doesn't line up perfectly, it'll be a one-way trip to a strange planet.

But that doesn't bother Scar. He likes his job plenty, but there's something to be said for sunrises and wind in your hair, and he hasn't been on a planet in so long. Not like that, anyway. Besides which, there's a good chance it'll be a one-way trip for Scar however well everything else lines up.

Also, Scar could probably milk a few more promises out of the company. He's given so much of himself to them, after all. "So who do I talk to about --"

"No, Scar," says Grian. "You're getting a whole new ship out of this!"

"Oh!" He's overlooked that. "Well then I definitely need to talk to them about that. I have some exterior redesign ideas --"

"Please tell me you're not gonna tell them to put abs on it."

"-- and after all I've done for them I don't think it's that much to ask if I --"

"There are no abs in space," Grian says, despairingly. "In space, no one can see your abs."

Scar tsks. "I don't think you understand my vision."

"I understand it all too well," he says. "It's just that your vision is terrible, and it's abs."

"My vision is perfect! I can see everything for millions of miles," says Scar, but he can sense it's time to try a different tack. "What do you want that they weren't giving you?"

"Oh. Oh! Actually," says Grian. "Actually I've got -- oh, but you're not gonna be able to explain it to them. Anyway, I already tried, and they wouldn't listen."

"Try me!" says Scar.

"All right," says Grian, "but don't say I didn't warn you." He sends Scar another document -- this one is long, and dense, and sciencey, and has lots of anatomical diagrams. He catches a doozy of a sentence on its way into his head -- All subjects who had undergone this procedure were able to be fully reconstituted at least twice after full molecular disintegration, with no loss in learning and only moderate disruption to social groups. It takes Scar a few moments to comprehend what that means and translate it, to understand that this process could bring a person back to life -- not just their body, but the whole person, memories and all -- no matter how they died. Or. Rats, at least, he realizes, maybe not people. But that's a pretty big deal, even if it's just in rats. Scar definitely won't understand all the nuts and bolts of it, but he's sure he can sell it. "Just. Just don't put them off it any more than they already are, I still want to be able to try again with it after this expedition," Grian says.

"Wonderful," says Scar. He notes the feedback that's attached to the document, that they won't entertain Grian's proposal due to ethical concerns and liability issues. That should be easy enough to get around -- it's hard to hold anyone liable for anything if you're trapped hundreds of light years away from any court or law enforcement body, and if Farlands Planetary Systems actually has ethical concerns Scar's never heard of them. "I'll just remind them you're not going anywhere without me," he says.

"Um," says Grian, sounding very uncomfortable.

Scar can take a hint, although where he goes with it isn't always where it was supposed to go, apparently. "I mean, how would you get to another planet without a spaceship? Can't take the bus!" He settles into a planet-blurring orbit around Jupiter. "Look at this, I love doing this," he says, lining up with one of Jupiter's rings. "It's like being on a space train!"

"That's not -- Scar, please take this seriously. The proposal for the company, I mean. It could save all our lives out there," says Grian. "You have no idea how hard I worked on that."

"Oh, I will," Scar promises. "I can tell you right now, you won't regret this."

"Yeah, well. We'll see about that," says Grian, sounding almost like he already does. He can fool himself, but he can't fool Scar, and a moment or two after Grian disconnects, Scar receives information on all the people he's going to have to talk into his design changes for the new jumpship. Oh, and Grian's thing too, probably.

[mint-fixates]

Visiting Hours

In which Stanford visits Bill in the Theraprism.

Stanford Pines could not, for the life of him, think of any logical reason he should be here right now.

He'd dedicated 30 long years of his life to destroying Bill. He (and his brother, of course) had been successful in that endeavor. He told everyone, including himself, that all he wanted now was to wash his hands of the entire ordeal and move past it.

Yet here he was, sitting patiently in the Theraprism. Waiting to once again be face to face with the being he'd once called his muse, the being he'd once held dearer than anything or anyone.

He was harshly jolted out of his thoughts by the distinct sound of Bill's laughter.

“Awww, Sixer! I knew you'd miss me!” Bill slid into the chair on the other side of the glass, “Sure took ya long enough to come see me, though!”

“Miss you? Hardly,” Ford crossed his arms and rolled his eyes, “They said that my presence would be ‘productive to your healing’. The entire staff practically begged me.”

“Fordsy, if you hated me half as much as you pretend to, they couldn't have convinced you with a gun to your head.”

Stanford's face burned. “I did not miss you! It was a simple matter of curiosity. Don't-”

“Oh, come onnnnn,” Bill interrupted, “Is it really that hard to admit it? I missed you! There, easy peasy. Your turn.”

Ford screwed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I don't know why I bothered. This was a terrible idea.”

As Ford rose from his chair, Bill's eye shot wide open.

“Woah, hey, wait! I won't tease you anymore if you're gonna be all sensitive about it, alright? Just… sit down, will ya? I'm bored out of my mind in here.”

“You're out of your mind no matter where you are,” Ford snarked as he sat back down.

“Fair point,” Bill shrugged, “So, how’s life treating ya these days? It's been a while!”

Ford found the casual question extremely unsettling. He couldn't think of a time that Bill had asked him about himself, how he was doing.

“... I've been well, thank you,” Ford replied hesitantly, “And yourself?”

“Oh, fantastic. Really living the dream here, Sixer,” Bill said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

“I have to say, I’m very curious about the methods they use here,” Ford said earnestly, “They must have some advanced tactics, given the nature of their patients.”

“Oh-ho, they absolutely do not,” Bill groaned, “It's all the same useless shit they use on your planet. ‘Talking about your feelings’, ‘processing your trauma’, all that nonsense.”

Ford raised an eyebrow. “Well, those things can be effective, but you have to be willing to actually attempt them.”

Bill scoffed. “C’mon, you know me, Sixer! That mushy stuff isn't really my M.O.”

“Yes, that's precisely why they called me,” Ford rolled his eyes, “They seem to think I'll have better luck than they've had in that regard.”

Despite the doctors' insistence, Ford found the notion ridiculous. Frankly, all of it was ridiculous. The idea that Bill was even capable of making progress, the suggestion that Ford was important enough to Bill to be a catalyst for it- and the most ridiculous was the fact that he'd agreed to help.

He could sympathize with the doctors who had to deal with Bill regularly, he told himself. If he could make their jobs any easier, he had some kind of moral obligation to do so, as the person most intimately familiar with how vexing the demon could be. Surely that must be the reason he'd agreed to come, right?

“They think you're going to get more out of me than they can? That's cute!” Bill laughed, “What a plan, dangle some eye candy in front of me and hope I spill my tragic backstory. Clearly working with some grade-A staff here.”

Ford blinked in surprise. “I'm sorry, what did you call me?”

Bill squinted at him. “What, is that offensive somehow? Or is it just that everything I say seems to piss you off lately?”

Ford shook his head. “No, I'm not offended, I'm just… did I hear you right? ‘Eye candy'?”

Bill looked just as confused as Ford felt. “Yeah, you're hot, what about it?”

Stanford could feel the blush creeping across his face, which he attempted to hide behind his hand. “I… didn't realize you thought of me that way.”

“You're kidding, right?” Bill asked dryly, “Why would we have done, y’know, any of the stuff we did together if I didn't think you were hot?”

Ford instinctively looked around in a panic, though he quickly realized that everyone else around was from a completely different dimension and likely had no idea who he was outside of being “Bill Cipher's ex”. That certainly lessened the embarrassment of anyone overhearing their conversation, at least.

“I assumed it was a manipulation tactic,” Stanford mumbled, clearing his throat awkwardly.

“Pfft, Sixer, you worshiped me, remember? I didn't need to do anything extra to get you to build the portal. I did the extra stuff because I wanted to.”

That detail was insignificant and irrelevant in the grand scheme of their horrific relationship. There was also a significant chance it was a complete lie. None of that was helping Ford feel less flustered.

“I don't- I-” Ford struggled to come up with anything to say in response, his mind forgoing complete thoughts in favor of floundering gracelessly.

“Awww, I missed seeing you get all flustered over me, Fordsy,” Bill said cheekily.

“I am not!” Ford protested.

“Suuuure, brainiac. You're the picture of calm and composed right now,” Bill teased, “Y’know, I think they offer conjugal visits if you're-”

“No!” Ford snapped, not even willing to entertain the idea, “This is insanity. You're really trying to convince me that our entire ‘relationship’ was anything more than some twisted form of emotional manipulation?”

“Sixer, you're the one that called things off. I wanted you to join me, you ruined the plan by going all ‘noble hero on a quest for vengeance’ on me,” Bill folded his arms and rolled his eye, “Which I thought was cute at first, but then you ruined Weirdmageddon and got me stuck in here, so. This little roleplay thing you started has gotten a lot less fun since then.”

For just a moment, Ford felt... relieved. He had to remind himself quite harshly that damn near everything Bill said was a lie. Clearly, Bill wanted something from him, and he wasn't going to stand for it.

“You are unbelievably infuriating, do you know that? Like an absolute idiot, I thought maybe, just maybe, we could have one honest conversation. That maybe your therapy has actually accomplished something,” Ford snapped, glaring at Bill through the glass, “I don't know why I'm surprised, because lying is all you ever do, but-”

“Ugh, again with this,” Bill groaned, “Come on, you're smarter than this! Think, genius- why did the staff ask you to come here? I have a pretty good guess.”

Ford huffed. “What would that be?”

“They think you can get answers out of me that they can't because I told you about what happened to- about my home dimension, right?” Bill asked, “Because you're the only one I told, right? Soooo maybe you can put these puzzle pieces together and get it through your head.”

“You tortured me for months!”

“Because you ended up like EVERYONE ELSE!” Bill shouted, turning red, “I thought you understood! I thought we were going to liberate the multiverse together! But noooo, you found out about my plan and you wanted nothing to do with it. You thought I was crazy and evil and-”

“And you are!” Ford hissed, “What exactly did you expect, Bill? You destroyed your dimension, and it drove you insane with guilt. What did you think it would do to me, to suffer the same fate? To accidentally destroy my home, live with my family's blood on my hands? Oh, I'm sorry, how silly of me. You didn't think about what it would do to me, because you never cared about me. You had your little ‘plan’, and it never once mattered to you what I wanted or how I would feel.”

Bill was silent, staring at Stanford with an unreadable expression. Ford was breathing heavily, trying to calm his frayed nerves. Bill wasn't supposed to know that he’d been told the full story of the Euclydian Massacre- he was supposed to get Bill to admit what he'd done on his own. That was what the doctors had requested of him, and now it was completely out of the window.

“You want me to be honest so bad? Alright. Strap in, Sixer,” Bill finally spoke, looking more exhausted than Ford had ever seen him, “You and I are the same. Underneath all your self-righteous bullshit, we always have been. I was trying to make you stronger, get rid of those pesky moral hang-ups of yours. Because you could've been something great. We could've been something great! I know it. I saw it.”

“What you did to your dimension didn't make you ‘stronger’, Bill. The longer you deny that, the longer you'll be trapped here,” Ford sneered, rising from his chair, “If you’d tried to be more like me, rather than trying to make me more like you, you wouldn't be in this mess.”

“Sure, Fordsy. Sooo, same time next week?” Bill asked casually, his care-free facade slipping easily back into place.

Ford said nothing as he walked away. As much as he hated to admit it, he knew he would be visiting again. However, Bill didn't need to know that quite yet.

[cosmiclion]

I've been working on my Familiar AU more and finished another old sketch. Meet another of my OCs, her name's Maggie.

She’s like a wet cat and I love her. Also she’s Grell’s biological mother (I wouldn’t have bothered to make parents for Grell but I felt like they were needed to explain her personality and behavior lol).

-Margaret Katherine Müller (née O’Sullivan) -Irish -Born in May 20th, 1838 -Widow

Full backstory under the cut, be warned that it's very long lmao.

The following character bio deals with topics like violent death of a significant other, major injury and trauma, reproductive coercion, unwanted parenthood, child emotional neglect and eventual abandonment, and misogyny. Also I’ll be using he/him for Grell for most of it as she figured herself out years after these events and she views her past self as a different person (I won't be revealing her deadname tho).

Maggie emigrated to England with her elderly aunt and uncle and an older cousin, the latter of whom set off to work in a farm in the other side of the country.

She befriended a boy called Gustav, son of a German couple who owned a shop that Maggie’s aunt visited often. By their teenage years they were sweethearts.

When Maggie’s aunt and uncle passed away, Gustav's parents were delighted to take her in.

They got married as soon as they legally could. They did talk about children, but agreed that it wasn’t something they really wanted. They didn’t change their minds even after six years of marriage.

Their neighbourhood was peaceful, the only time they heard about anything unusual was when the neighbours started warning each other about a werebeast that had been seen roaming nearby.

One night they were taking a stroll through the park and that’s where they saw it. It looked like a starving stray cat, only as big as a horse. As soon as they made a move, the beast charged at them. It mauled Gustav beyond recognition and would’ve mauled Maggie too if it wasn’t for a group of armed neighbors that were patrolling nearby and shot it dead just in time as it was biting her leg.

The woman was rushed to the hospital. The doctors managed to save her leg, but said she’d probably need a cane to walk.

After some rehabilitation she was finally ready to go home and the doctor came in to give his final report. He said they wanted to run a few tests first but now could safely say it: she was pregnant.

They got home and she heard her in-laws talking excitedly. She finally snapped out of it. She didn’t want a child, she could never be a good mother. All she wanted was to mourn in peace, to be left alone. She didn’t want this baby and didn’t want this pregnancy.

You can’t just say that. Your husband has left you the most precious gift a woman could ever receive. We know you can be a wonderful mother. This child will bring us so much joy, please don’t deny that to us.

And so she complied. She kept telling herself that maybe this child would really be a beautiful reminder of her husband. And when she finally had the baby in her arms, she looked down at him and felt nothing but regret.

She still hoped that she’d bond with the baby over time but that never happened. Her in-laws had her come live with them and they didn’t leave her side for the first months. After a while they went back to their usual routine and the new mother was left alone with the infant for long periods, thinking What now?

The kid was spoiled rotten by his grandparents. Maggie did her best to hide her unhappiness behind a polite smile, but at the same time she just did the bare minimum to keep the kid alive and wasn’t really there emotionally.

Maggie thought that maybe she could endure this until the kid was old enough to not want to be around her as often, but BY GOD was it hard. One day he was being particularly fussy and, in the middle of a tantrum, she finally snapped and grabbed him by his arm a little too roughly. He broke into tears, shrieking dramatically. Maggie had had enough.

And so one day she finally bailed out. She had previously written to her cousin, who agreed to take her in to live and work at the farm without questioning her.

Her in-laws were LIVID. What kind of woman abandons her own child without looking back? They continued to raise their grandkid as best as they could, which meant spoiling him even more and turning him into an entitled brat in the process.

The kid started hating his mother. All his life all he’d ever wanted was to be hugged by her, to hear some words of affection. But he never got anything beyond some headpats and faint smiles and now she was gone, that whore.

It wasn’t easy for Maggie to begin her new life, but she didn’t regret it for one second. With enough time she got used to the demanding farm life and became happier than she had been in a long time. She never remarried and lived a long, fullfiling life.

A couple of years later, when Grell was rummaging through her grandparents' belongings to see what she could take before running away in search of adventure, she found a letter addressed to them. It was from her mother, apparently answering to another letter they had sent to her in which they begged her to come visit Grell. The last lines read Do not contact me about this child again, he is not my responsibility, I do not have anything to do with him anymore. In fact, do not contact me again at all, we are not family anymore.

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

If you've made it this far then thank you, I might have gotten a bit carried away lmao 🙏🏻

[ryndicate]

How bad do you want it? ⨳ Ichida Ryuken

"Then you know what to do."

notes: for @semisgroupie 's what's done in the dark collab! I've finally written something for bleach and I couldn't be happier to be writing about daddy Ishida >:3

warnings: uneven power dynamic, abuse of position, reader is given multiple outs aka consent, unprotected sex, public/risky sex

By expanding you are agreeing to viewing adult content and all warnings listed above. 18+ Minors DNI

Rules & Main Links

Whispers have been echoing around you since you arrived at work this morning, early but not so bright at a severe three in the morning. 

"Have you seen next week's schedule?"

"I haven't had a day off in three weeks."

"At least you don't have four back to back doubles. I've done nothing but work and sleep for god knows how—"

"Ma'am!" The youngest nurse in the lineup, Sachi you think, pops up from her seat after catching sight of you frowning at your boards. You turn to see her pacing towards you and grimace. 

You had seen the schedules too and were feeling the drain the same as everyone else. A few staff members from your department had been transferred last month with no replacements in sight.

"Can you please talk to Dr. Ishida," she all but begs you, her voice carrying enough to draw some of the other nurses towards you, their expressions taking on a hopeful outlook. "If anyone can convince him to hire more nurses it would be you."

Too late to escape, you try to ready a smile as the other nurses chorus at you, anxiety climbing.

"He always listens to you! It's probably because you're so good at your job."

"Yeah, I couldn't even get him to order new pens."

"He's so curt with everyone else."

"It wouldn't hurt to try, right?" Sachi throws on her best puppy eyes for good measure and you feel your willpower splinter. "Worst he could say is no?"

"Fine," you sigh, the pulsing of a new headache sounding like the last nails in your coffin. "I'll ask him after my shift today; he's got surgeries for most of the afternoon and a consultation in the evening."

Everyone relaxes measurably, breaking off one by one to get back to their duties and thanking you in hushed tones as the man in question appears around the corner.

Dr. Ishida Ryuuken barely gives you a cursory glance before breezing right past and you stiffen, making a show of studying the papers in your hand until he's gone. 

It's right to feel intimidated; tall and fit with vibrant snowy hair and a sharp jawline, he's incredibly handsome, barely looking a day over thirty despite having a teenage son. Quiet and icily strict, he’s a talented and sought after doctor despite losing his wife all those years ago. You could hardly imagine a man as cutting as him to even have had a wife, but you've never married so you guess you don't understand what it's like to lose a partner.

"Wouldn't hurt him to be nicer though." You rub your eyes, mumbling the words under your breath before glancing over your shoulder to make sure no one heard you. 

It’s a long day, like always. The work is hard, but in the end it’s good work. Infected stitches, bed sores, endless looping conversations with worried patients… someone has to do it, right?

You’re standing in the nurses bathroom exhausted, starving, and making a small attempt to wash some of the day’s grime away while you work up the nerve to go back upstairs to your department head’s office. This is honestly the last thing you wanted to do today, but you’ve been here longer than the rookies who swarmed you this morning, and honestly? They’re right. If they tried to talk to Dr. Ishida, he would have sent them running with their tails between their legs. You, on the other hand, have a little more backbone than that.

Feet still sore from the day you take the elevator up, thankful to find it empty and silent, and make your way down the familiar path to his office. You pause outside the door at the sound of muffled voices coming through the door. You check your watch. It’s nearly eight; you thought he’d be done with his consultation by now. There’s no way it would have run this long. Listening intently you try to make out the words.

“Sir, it’s the board of directors again. They’re trying to schedule—”

“Tell them I’m not here.”

“They’re not going to believe that.”

There’s a beat of silence and you can almost feel the undoubtedly stormy glare roiling behind his glasses.

“Then tell them to contact me during my operating hours. I’m off duty. They can leave a message like everyone else.”

“Sir, it’s the board.”

There’s more silence, and you step back from the door quickly when you realize their conversation is over, trying to appear unassuming. 

Ishida’s haggard looking aid doesn’t spare you a glance as they leave, and suddenly you feel less pessimistic about your own job.

The door is ajar so you tap your knuckles on the door, peeking in.

Dr. Ishida looks up from his desk, eyes still sharp, but some of the severity dissipates as he realizes it’s you.

“What is it this time?” He goes back to the papers on his desk. He’s aloof, bored, but with no direct dismissal you gather your nerves to do what you came for. You leave the door open to make the point that this won't take long.

“The nurses are still having a hard time since the transfers finalized,” you start, haltingly.

There’s several long moments of silence and for a moment you think he’s going to ignore you indefinitely before he looks up, raising an eyebrow at you.

“And?” 

The dry expectancy of his tone has heat rising beneath your collar, but you grit your teeth and work up your customer service smile from the days you worked retail to put yourself through nursing school. You never thought that experience would actually be useful, but here you are.

“Well, I understand how important your time is, sir, but we were hoping you might take some time out of your busy schedule to hire some additional staff to help balance the workload.”

As much as you try, there’s no curbing the biting undercurrent to your words. You’ve been in this position too many times to not be tired of it, and today you really just want to go home.

The good doctor turns his chair to face you, and his now piercing stare is enough to whittle away at your faltering confidence shakily propped up by indignance. You find your feet shifting as you try to ease your discomfort as he looks you over.

When he doesn’t say anything you’re getting ready to turn and stalk out of his office, but he finally speaks.

His voice is smooth now, nonchalant. “How important is this?”

“It would really help, sir,” you sigh, meek and defeated as he moves his chair a few feet back from his desk, the wheels giving a light squeak as they catch on the carpet. He leans back in it, crossing his arms. There’s an intensity in his eyes now that's different, an unspoken dare.

“Then you know what to do.”

There's that moment of resistance, there always is, where you simply maintain his stare with the blankest expression you can manage. But you inevitably crumble.

With a silent sigh, you reach for the hem of your scrubs and pull the colored pattern over your head. You're reaching for your bra when you pause, remembering the door is still open. 

Your hands drop and you're turning when Dr. Ishida's voice quietly rumbles across the room.

"Leave it." You glare at him and he stares back, immovable. "Unless you're done here?"

There it is, your best chance at walking out. Ignoring his bait you swallow your biting retort and unhook your bra, heat rising beneath your skin as he eyes your exposed tits, already hard from the scrutiny. You don't give him much more time than that, kicking out of your shoes and shoving your scrub bottoms off before coming around the edge of his desk.

You're left in nothing but a simple pair of gray cotton panties. Trying to hide your nerves, you lay yourself over his desk, nipples tightening painfully against the cold wood, hips raised and jutted out, displaying your ass for him.

You inhale slowly as he trails his hand up your outer thigh, skimming over the curve of your ass with such a gentle touch that it’s almost too sensitive. It makes you want to shy away, but you know that would only displease him, so you bite your inner cheek and steel yourself.

“Laundry day?” Ryuuken hums idly, sliding a finger in the band curving your left cheek and letting it go with a soft snap.

“With respect, fuck you, sir,” you sigh wearily, not in the mood for his brand of teasing today.

There’s a single note chuckle behind you, and you hate the way it sears against your skin like a brand, goosebumps rising down your spine in anticipation as you feel him move closer behind you. Instinctively you raise yourself to the balls of your feet as you feel his erection against your ass.

“Good girl.”

He’s amused now and you want nothing more than to hiss at him like a disgruntled cat, but your anxious eyes keep flickering to the open door, the risk of someone walking past keeping you silent.

Ryuuken rolls his hips into your ass a few times and smoothes a palm up your back, apparently content with taking his time.

“Will you hurry up?” you finally hiss, shuddering as his fingers make a third pass up and down your spine. You can feel the uncomfortable wetness growing between your thighs, the damp patch against your entrance sticking to your pussy. 

His hand immediately wraps around the back of your neck, effectively scruffing you, and you can’t help but let out a little squeak of surprise. He presses more tightly against you, leaning down to put his lips by your ear.

“Be quiet or get out,” Ryuuken murmurs, soft and dangerous, but the apparent lust roughening his tone is like little sparks bursting in your gut. You go limp, resigning yourself to his petting, arousal building like bubbling pressure in a coffee machine. 

You’re a hot flustered mess by the time you hear the clink of his belt, and you can’t help the tiny moan of approval as he finally tugs down your panties. The ache between your thighs has you biting every ounce of self restraint to keep your hips from arching towards him, letting him press on the small of your back and bump your feet into his preferred position like you wouldn’t have done it yourself given the chance.

A mewl is on the tip of your tongue, half choked as you chew your lower lip, at the feel of his fingers swiping through the slick you’ve accumulated. It receives a low hum of approval before his fingers are replaced with the blunt tip of his cock.

There’s a fog swirling over your mind. You can’t remember hearing the sound of a condom, but the heat and warmth of him slowly sinking into you is enough to send any worries of that flying from your mind. Your knuckles are white on the edge of the desk as you chew on a whine; his girth is something you’ve always reluctantly referred to as perfect, just enough to leave you full without making you grit at any pain, but his length always has you holding your breath because it never seems to end. He gives a little sigh behind you that has your mind fill with fluff, crackles of electricity sparking like exposed wires through your nerves.

“Breathe,” Ryuuken instructs calmly, and you hiccup, drawing in air like you just remembered how. “Again.”

There’s tears threatening your lashline as he stills, and you want to growl and posture at this stupid, sexy, rude as hell doctor being kind enough to give you time to adjust, but the alternative isn’t worth it. Knowing him, he’d rub it rather smugly in your face just how much you’re dripping all over him. So you sniffle instead, and tip your hips up just a little more, moaning in your throat as it has him pressing tighter against the front wall of your pussy.

One of his hands is stroking over the fat of your ass almost absentmindedly, as your pussy ripples around him at random, finally growing impatient for more stimulation. As if sensing your frustration, his grip moves to your waist and you curl a forearm under your cheek, ready to muffle any sounds if you need to.

His thrusts are quick and dirty right from the start, and your teeth are making divots in your arm before you know it. You get the sense that you’re not the only one stressed from today’s workload; it’s as if he’s trying to slam every ounce of pent up frustration out through your cunt. The unbreaking pace is mind-numbing and your eyes glaze over as he strikes deep in your core. 

Ryuuken’s grunts are quiet but they bathe over your ears, causing your pussy to squeeze down on him, and the hand supporting the brunt of his force flashes back to grab his wrist as you feel pleasure curl so close to the surface that you’re sure you’d crumble if it didn’t peak. He shakes his hand out of your grip and you almost sob, but he’s tugging your hips back further off the desk and reaching under you, the tips of his fingers brushing over your clit and your whole body locks up as your orgasm rips through you. 

His breathed curse falls on deaf ears as you ride out the blissful storm, extended by the way he savagely pulls you back on his cock, jerking into you unevenly, frantically, and you taste iron and salt as he sinks deep and grinds.

He’s still for a moment, breathing hard before his cock slips out of your cunt, and you feel warmth spilling down your thighs. One of these days you’ll have half a mind left to pay attention when Dr. Ishida Ryuuken loses his composure, but you’re too preoccupied with riding out the final aftershocks as he straightens his clothes behind you and smoothes his hair down.

Only then does he slide your panties back up your legs, making sure they’re firmly in place. There’s the soft sound of rustling fabric and finally your awareness rouses. You raise your head to see the office door closed, and your discarded scrubs sitting on the corner of his desk. 

Ryuuken watches you silently as you redress, offering no words, and you don't need them. You've been here before; you did what you came for, and he got what he wanted. Words weren’t necessary. Words complicate things.

He opens the door for you as you slip on your shoes. “Until next time.”

Something indescribable brightens inside you at Ryuuken’s words, and you give him a searing glare. In return you receive a small smirk, and he closes the door behind you with a light click.

As you walk down the hall, you tell yourself it’s only to gain favor with your employees, to help everyone out. That it’s altruism in its finest for you to pimp yourself out to the head of the department. That it has absolutely nothing to do with how well he fucks you and sends you on your way with shaking legs and a dripping cunt. Absolutely nothing at all.

Sachi is sitting at the nurse's station when you get down there, and you belatedly realize she was one of the nurses working double today.

“Oh, your arm!” She gasps, peeling out of her seat and dashing for the first aid cart. “I hate it when patients bite.”

You look down to see the mark on your arm; it’s bleeding, barely, but the crescent shape is like a ghostly reminder of his smile right before he closed the door in your face, and your heart jumps against your wishes.

Your glare returns in earnest.

Damn him.

© All rights reserved to @ryndicate. Do not modify, translate, or repost.

[somber-sapphic]

Hi!!! I rarely request but your writing is so good I could not resist the urge. I love the Carina x Maya x Reader fics you posted, theres not enough writing for the Station 19 universe. I was hoping you could write another one, or even just a Carina x Maya. I feel like because Maya has such a dangerous job, Carina definitely slips into doctor mode every time she gets hurt or sick. Could you write where Maya gets sick with strep throat or something but Carina is unable to get her to Grey Sloan or the E.R (maybe they went on a vacation or there is bad weather) so she decides to examine Maya herself. (P.S. I hope you’re having a good day and if not tomorrow will be better💕💕)

17, 17A,🌸

Sickness At Sea

〖Notes: Alrighty my basement flooded and I think I've got carpal tunnel so lets write some sickfics! (PS, I love this request, I'm so sorry it took me so long to get to it, please feel free to send in another when my asks are open <;3〗

〖Summary: Maya and Carina finally get to go on a vacation. Of course that's the perfect time for Maya's immune system to give out.〗

〖Word Count: 〗

〖Pairing: Carina DeLuca x Sick Maya Bishop〗

☾Masterlists☽

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Maya groaned and stared out the window at the crashing waves caused by the torrential downpour that was ravaging the east coast. She was inwardly cursing Carina for convincing her to come to Maine, especially when they lived so close to the beach in Seattle, but she had decided that they should leave Washington for a bit.

The two didn’t get time off together often so two weeks paid vacation at the same time was huge. So huge that her Italian girlfriend insisted that she and Maya had to see the East Coast. The blonde had argued that they could go somewhere a few hours’ drive rather than a seven-hour plane ride, but Carina had made it seem too good to refuse.

And it had been. The first week was wonderful. They’d spent time walking along the beach in the cool October weather and explored the nearby town, doing the regular touristy things. They’d found the restaurant with the best reviews and had the first proper date night in a long time, complete with fancy wine and even a violinist to serenade them.

Then the storm started. It was nice for the first day, it was relaxing. Then one day turned into two. And two into three. And how they were sitting in their beautiful house on the beach with the sea raging in front of them. There would be no walking on the sand, there would be no exploring the quiet town, there would be no anything.

The rain was coming down in sheets and Carina had been running around the house yelling in Italian about the damage and how they couldn’t stay there if the storm continued. Maya was starting to agree, it wasn’t entirely safe to be this close to the sand and she was beginning to worry that the beach would wash out.

“Car, it’ll be okay. I’ve seen beaches in Seattle handle worse than this.” The blonde croaked, wincing as the words grated against her throat. Carina, who was pacing around typing away furiously on her phone stopped and whipped around, her brow furrowing as she hyper-focused on a new target: Maya.

“What is wrong with your voice? Are you sick? Tell me your symptoms.” She had switched from panicking about the storm and settled right into her doctor persona. The firefighter rolled her eyes, trying not to wince at the action. She was finding herself wanting to let Carina do her job, but her pride was far more important than her wish for assistance.

The woman had been feeling more and more weary as the week went on, but she had chalked it up to all of the things they had been doing, refusing to admit that they hadn’t been doing anything particularly strenuous. Now, after two days of doing just about nothing, she was sort of out of excuses. She was tired, her throat was killing her, her body ached, and she couldn’t deny the presence of a fever bubbling under her skin.

“It’s nothing, I’m fine. Sit, take a breath. I made coffee, you need some.” Maya said softly, lowering her voice to try to ease the pain in her throat. It didn’t help. The level of her voice didn’t matter, it was the act of simply breathing that caused her discomfort.

Carina hmphed unhappily but went to grab herself a mug, pouring what her girlfriend considered to be way too much creamer into the dark liquid, followed by what could be considered enough sugar to feed an entire town.

“How can you drink it so sweet?” She joked, trying to put a little humor into her voice as thunder clapped loudly over the small town. The EMT jumped, frightened by the suddenness of the loud sound. A blush crept across her cheeks as she glanced over at Carina, who had a concerned expression on her face.

Her brow was furrowed, and her lips pursed, looking wholly unhappy with the situation. The rain pattered down on the roof, a nearly deafening sound. It probably would’ve been relaxing if not for the sick feeling that was growing in Maya and Carina’s nerves beginning to fray.

This was supposed to be a vacation and the OBGYN really didn’t want to beat around the bush right now. She wanted to treat the woman she loved so that they could have her feeling better as soon as possible.

She wasn’t interested in playing Maya’s “embrace the pain” game and couldn’t help but feel a little guilty for even thinking that way. It wasn’t the blonde’s fault that she was so hard on herself, but it certainly didn’t make Carina’s job of taking care of her any easier.

The moment she sat down she felt Maya curl up against her, moving so smoothly that she may not have noticed if not for the way she was shivering, her muscular body trembling like a leaf. The brunette squeezed her eyes shut and sighed, pressing her head into the woman’s hair.

“You are sick Maya. Just tell me what’s wrong.” She murmured, moving so that she could hold the woman a little bit closer. Maya nestled close, humming her unhappiness as she felt tears fill her fever-clouded eyes. She really didn’t want to be crying, it was barely 8 in the morning, it was too early to be crying. Especially over a silly little sore throat.

“Bambina, please. Don’t make me play urm…twenty questions.” Carina said gently, tilting Maya’s head up so that she could look into her beautiful green orbs. The blonde blinked quickly as she held back tears, her lower lip beginning to quiver. She hadn’t realized just how bad she felt until her girlfriend had brought it up, but now it was all that she could think about.

“It hurts.” She whimpered, her voice small and full of humiliation. She hated every part of this, admitting weakness was hard enough but it was even worse that this was happening while they were on vacation. Sure, that meant she had time to recover, but she was supposed to be spending quality time with the woman she loved, not sleeping while the brunette fed her medicine. That was no fun for anyone.

“What hurts Maya?” The doctor prodded, needing far more information than what she was being given. Maya just shrugged and pulled the throw around her shoulders as she continued to stare out the large glass windows, watching as the waves ravaged the sandy shore.

“Okay, how about we switch out that coffee for tea, yeah?” The idea of swallowing anything (even her own saliva) made the woman want to cry. At this point, she didn’t even care. She sniffled back tears and tried to hide her face, embarrassed to be crying over something so trivial. She came across people every day who were in far more dire positions handling their pain or fear with so much more grace.

“I-I can’t. My throat just hurts too much.” Maya rasped, hot tears spilling down her cheeks. Her shoulders began to heave as she cried, the action just serving to hurt her throat even more. That in turn made her cry harder, which just repeated itself in a vicious cycle.

“Hey, hey, hey. I’m here. Just tell me what’s wrong amore. Let me help.” Carina pleaded, feeling so utterly helpless. She hated when her girlfriend got sick, she hated not being able to do anything as a person she loved so much suffered in silence.

“I can’t, I don’t know! M-my throat hurts! It, it shouldn’t!” The blonde spat, her words barely comprehensible through her sobs. The Italian woman put her coffee on the small table and took Maya’s hands in hers, forcing the ill firefighter to meet her eyes.

“Maya, take a deep breath. I can help you, but you need to let me. I’m a doctor, I take care of people for a living. Let me help.” she asserted, raising her eyebrows as she tried to get through to her sweet, sick girlfriend. The blonde’s lower lip was still quivering, but she managed to quiet her sobs as she matched Carina’s slow breathing.

“Good. Now, can you let me give you an exam? I will be quick.” After a few moments, Maya nodded, her breath still hitching as she tried to calm down. Maybe she was overreacting, but she had such a hard time with the out-of-control feeling that came with being sick. She would rather be put in a blazing fire than be physically incapacitated and need to rely on others for help.

True to her word, Carina’s exam took barely five minutes. She had raced to the bedroom to get her medical bag and then began to look Maya over, starting with what she figured was wrong. She looked at the back of the blonde’s throat, sighing when she saw those familiar white splotches that she’d seen all too many times.

“And a temperature of 102 degrees Fahrenheit. Which is…too high. Stupid imperial system.” She said that last part under her breath as she mentally tried to convert the imperial temperature to the metric system that she had grown up with.

Her distaste over the different systems of measuring made Maya smile a little as she leaned back against the cushions of the couch, shivering a little.

“What’s the verdict, Doc?” She teased, getting a frown out of her girlfriend. She may have felt terrible but the cute look on Carina’s face was worth the forced humor.

“We won’t know for sure until we get a culture, but I believe you have Streptococcus. The weather is too bad to go to the Urgent Care, but we will go as soon as the rain stops, okay? For now, it's Tylenol, soup, and rest.” The brunette said, sounding fully like the doctor that she was. Maya smiled a bit from where she was laying, closing her eyes as she curled back against the comfortable sofa.

“Can rest happen first?” She mumbled; the tears having taken a lot out of her. Carina made a sound in the back of her throat as she thought it over, weighing the best option here. Technically she should have Maya take the medicine to get the fever down, but it was very hard to say ‘no’ to the woman in front of her.

“I suppose. Would you rather go back to bed?” The blonde shook her head as she lay down, taking up the ample space on the couch.

“You gotta join me. ‘s the rules.” She mumbled, her voice slurring with exhaustion. Carina chuckled quietly and climbed back onto the couch, slipping her thermometer and stethoscope back into what Maya annoyingly called her “doctor bag”. She wasn’t wrong to call it that, but it irked the brunette to no end for reasons she simply could not explain.

She pushed the bag aside and lay down against Maya, wrapping an arm around her waist. She settled in, pulling a bit of the blanket up over herself, resigning that she would probably get this illness. Strep was incredibly contagious and she refused to be away from the woman she loved.

Any time they could spend together was worth a week of antibiotics.

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[saturns-cryptid]

Never got to share some of my headcanons for the hfr characters but here we go:

Chai is a blind mf (near-sighted) and needs glasses. Like, right now.

I don’t really know what glasses to give him though. Maybe like John Johanas has. Those could probably suit him.

Korsica is sporty, without a doubt, all about that daily exercise and healthy nutritious diet. What sport would she do though? I think boxing, like with Macaron, would probably suit her, yet I’d also think of kickboxing and maybe some jogging on the side.

On that note, Chai seems extremely flexible, almost if not outright gymnast levels. It remains a mystery for how long Chai had his right arm the way it was before the implant. Maybe he had it like that since he was a baby, but I can imagine him somehow injuring it in his early years, and it was just so severe that he couldn’t get its fine motor skills back. Like, maybe Chai has a degenerative disease that either runs in the family or only affected him due to him being a gymnast.

Or he’s just that naturally flexible and jumpy idk

Another headcanon for Korsica (me fine woman) is that she actually used to play drums and it’s not just a motive that she has in the game with her batons. Maybe she was part of the school orchestra and would only play simple tunes in there, while actually being good enough to pop off any minute. I instantly remember that video “When you’re overqualified for the job” when I think about it.

If the groups were to start a band, then Macaron would def be a piano guy and Peppermint the bass girly.

OKAY i'm gonna go down the headcanon list ting bc i love your takes and i want to respond to all of them properly TEE HEE

would NEVER have thought chai to be blind or in need of glasses tbh, though i'm here for it!! i personally think he would've been more far sighted bc of his ability to snatch onto magnets and grab enemies and stuff... (the thought of him squinting the entire game and hitting any moving robot looking blobs in his field of vision is pretty funny though tbh LOL) ... also i looked up john johanas and it's been a hot minute since i've booted up the game but i SWEAR the ones with the thick black frames are an actual pair of glasses you can get in the shop for chai and i am SOOO doodling that if i have the time

korsica is absolutely sporty. proof: sporty fit in shop. also she's head of security she literally HAS to stay in shape to spin that thang around. (also idk if it's just me but it's implied her batons are pretty heavy bc there's this one specific scene during her boss fight when the game is like "okay scratch parrying everything!" where she strains JUST a little bit to get into the spinning motion so she is SOOOOO absolutely muscular). ALSO did not think about korsica and macaron sparring!! macaron doesn't seem like the type to spar at his age LOL... but maybe he'd be up for it occasionally post game :0!!

i definitely think he would've tried to stay limber growing up all things considered, he has WAYYY too much stamina if he can beat up all those robots LOL but now that you mention it, he DID practically fold in half at the very end of the first stage... BUT i personally hc he has monoplegia as a result of an accident when he was really young as opposed to something he was born with. i'm by no means a medical expert, but it sounds... medically inaccurate for a degenerative muscle disease to stay in one arm? (if you ask me tho, i think he would have a brachial plexus birth injury IF he were to be born with it, but again) take that with a fistful of salt, i'm not a doctor and i don't know shit

i don't have much to say for the last two, i agree with you for the most part BWAHGAHGW i love the idea that if someone asked korsica about why she chose the weapons she chose, she'd just say something like "hitting drums, hitting people. same difference." and shrug BWAHWBJAHGSHJF

[m0use-trapped]

“Good morning Theodore, how’s your week been?”

[The patient had been quiet in their appointments so far. They hadn't shared much, aside from the direct answers to the questions asked. Sometimes, even those were left vague.]

“It's been… fine. S- standard.”

[Miss Jennings hummed and nodded.]

“There’s never enough to do in hospitals for long term patients.”

[The patient nodded back, looking down at their hands. Avoiding eye contact.]

“Yeah. The- the nurses have… not let me do much without- uh, without supervision.”

“They’re a big stickler on that, especially with you being new. Maybe I can try talking to them about letting you do more.”

[She wrote a note down, presumably to remind herself to do that.]

“And what about your meds, have you noticed any differences? Positive or negative, could even just be a side-effect.”

“Not much… I- I still find myself with… what did we call them? L- looping thoughts?”

[They hesitated, trying to figure out if that was the right term to explain the persistent feeling of being watched. It was, but they were second guessing it.]

“I’m sure it can’t be easy having to work on looping thoughts when you are being supervised everywhere you go. If it weren’t so cold out I’d suggest trying to go outside alone for a bit, and that could still be good if you’re willing to deal with the temperature. However, I can’t promise your doctors and nurses will agree with my plan. We all want what’s best for you, but we tend to butt heads on what we think is best for you. Of course that’s also up to you and if you’d want to go outside at all.”

“I think- yes, I think I would like that. The- the doctors would… probably want su- supervision, though.”

[They paused, still not having looked up from their hands.]

“I don't mind the cold.”

“Yes, I’m sure they will, that’s the butting heads part, but that will be my issue to deal with.”

[There was a pause in the conversation. Silence hung in the air between them, almost-awkward but not quite.]

“I saw on your file that it’s your birthday today. So happy birthday.”

[The patient blinked. Surprise was clear in their expression as they finally looked up at Miss Jennings. They looked startled.]

“It- what? I- I forgot it would- uh… thank you..?”

[They were not doing a very good job keeping the uneasiness out of their tone.]

“Sorry, that came a bit out of nowhere.”

[She stood up from her seat, grabbing a box from her desk and walking back over to hand it to the patient.]

“I don’t know you that well, so I apologize if this isn’t something you’d like, but at the very least it will give you something to do in your room.”

[The box read “Super Slide: Handheld Console for Sliding Puzzle.”]

[The patient looked down at the box as they took it, face still betraying their surprise.]

“Oh- I, uh- thank- thank you.”

[They winced at the amount they managed to stutter in the simple response, though they didn't comment on it. They looked down at the colorful puzzle, eyes darting back and forth as they read the box.]

“I've never heard of these. Thank you. You, uh, you didn't have to…”

[They trailed off there.]

“I'm aware I didn't need to, but I figured it would be a nice change of pace. Also truth be told I hadn't before this week either, but then I saw a video for it, and then I saw it at Walmart and figured it'd be a good puzzle.”

[They pulled their legs up onto the chair to sit cris-cross as they studied the box.]

“I- I think this will help. Thank you.”

[The familiar feeling of tears starting to come to their eyes was starting to become noticeable, and they blinked hard, trying to get rid of them before they became visible to Miss Jennings.]

“I'm glad you like it. All I ever hope to do is to make my client's lives better. Is there anything else you'd want to talk about?”

[They shook their head, then stopped themself to speak. The tears were gone.]

“I- yes, actually, uh…”

[They hesitated. They'd meant to say this the week before, but they never did. This wasn't actually something they had told anyone.]

“You- you know me as Theo, and I, uh-“

[The words stuck in their throat, and they faltered.]

“Take your time, we aren't in a rush here.”

[She smiled gently.]

[The patient's response was mumbled quietly enough that Miss Jennings couldn't actually hear it, but they seemed to realize that before she could say anything, and repeated themself slightly louder.]

“I've… been meaning to- to bring something up. It's- it's about gender, and…”

[They trailed off there, words eluding them.]

“Uh- yeah.”

[Miss Jennings hummed.]

“Alright, do you have a different name you would like me to call you?”

“Y- yes. Um- yes.”

[Hesitation, and more hesitation. They were putting this off.]

“Would you- uh… If I give you- a different name, do you- do you have to tell it to… anyone?”

[They were still putting this off. It's too late to go back now.]

“Nope, I can continue to refer to you as Theodore around others and call you by your new name when it's us two.”

[They nodded. They breathed out through their nose. This is fine, it'll be fine. Tell her.]

"..."

“Wren.”

[Breathe. It'll be fine. Keep breathing - do a better job. Breathe better.]

“Well, it's nice to meet you Wren, do you still like he/him pronouns?”

[Oh.]

“They/them. Please.”

[They looked down at their knees again.]

“Alright, thank you for trusting me with this. I know it's sometimes difficult to be open about it, especially with someone you don't know too well. I promise you, not a word of this will leave this room until you want it to, if you ever want it to.”

"Tha- thank you."

[The patient - Wren - spoke quietly. The anxiety that had twisted their stomach into knots slowly eased away as the response sank in. They didn't know what they had expected, but it was not this. This was nice.]

[It was nice, being heard.]

[It feels nice to be known.]

[qqueenofhades]

hello, it's youngin anon once again. i need advice and i have no one to ask, so i figured i could ask you. it's a lot and long, so if you don't want to answer, feel free to ignore.

idk how familiar you are with immigrant child guilt, but it weighs on me immensely. my parents work very hard and i can see the way they struggle. i remember when i was young we didn't even have a bed! me and my siblings slept on cushions. i've seen the insane hours my dad has worked so as to afford me and my siblings a better and more comfortable life. both of my parents have put in a lot of work to give us good opportunities, starting with their immigration to the US.

in nigerian culture, education is extremely important, so as i grew up, my parents have always told me to focus on my education, telling me not to work and it did pay off bc i did end up as valedictorian. college, however is presenting a new set of problems.

my dad, who i am financially dependent on (and who is paying the tuition for the state uni where i'm enrolled) has made it abundantly clear that he thinks med school is the only valid career path. i told him that my roommate was studying comms and he said that she could become a lawyer or something, before looking me dead in the eyes and that wasn't an option for me. with him, it's med school or bust.

as long as i could remember, my parents have been telling me i was going to become a doctor. every time i asked my dad to get me something, he say, i'll do it and in the future, you'll become a doctor, right? and i would agree and that was that. i've answered to all the adults who asked me that i was was going to med school and they would all give me smiles of approval. if i mentioned any other career growing up i'd be ruthlessly shot down or gently persuaded about how much more security there was in medicine.

i was aware in high school that i didn't really want to be a doctor so i sort of set myself up, enrolling under my college's science school so as to cut off my own retreat path. i figured that if i was able to bear it during high school, i could bear it during college. but i can see my own behavior and i know that i don't really like STEM. not that it's a bad field! i just don't have any interest in it. i read the textbooks to learn enough to pass the test and that's it. i don't interact with my classmates or the professors or the material beyond what's needed to get an A. this is in sharp contrast to my history classes which i have been enthralled with. I took a world history class in the first semester enjoyed it immensely. last semester i took a war and violence in africa class and LOVED it. it made me want to become an African historian/Africanist. i talk to my professors, enjoy the readings, the assignments, all the new info i'm getting on the continent where my family originates. i go to my history classes and i want to be there. i want to learn.

i don't know if i could survive academia as a profession because i've seen you posting about the struggles from working in academia and there was a large strike at my school last semester because professors weren't earning enough. if it were a perfect world or if i had lots of money i would love to get my Ph.D focusing on West African history and be a history professor, but it's not, so. i've been thinking about law school as a happy compromise. i could go to law school with a undergrad history degree and if i went to law school i could also pursue JD/MA in History. i'm trying out some law classes next semester to see how i like them.

i'm now scared that if i were to transfer to a different school in my college my scholarship might be reduced. i'm also afraid that i would lose my parents' financial support if i chose to pursue a different career path and i have no actual work experience.

and i understand my parents' very valid concerns! both of them grew up poor in Nigeria and it was their STEM educations that afforded them better lives. they don't want me to experience that level of crushing poverty that heavily defined their youth. my mom tells me about her younger brother in Nigeria who struggles to get work with his masters. my dad tells me about co-workers' children who can't get jobs in their field of profession and have to work whatever jobs come their way. from what i've seen on the news, the future job market looks bad for the young people (around the world!). millennials are having problems and my generation isn't set to do much better.

is it fair to my parents to just disregard that and pursue work in the humanities? i want to do what i want, to just live my life, but it feels like it's not just my life. it would feel so selfish to just risk that all. whenever i talk to my parents about their journey in the US i feel like i should just suck it all up and go to med school. if my parents could suffer all of that, who i am to complain? do my struggles compare?

i feel like my sense of pragmatism and idealism are warring against each other. I don't like STEM, I'm good at it, good enough to get good grades in the classes, but it's not something i enjoy doing, but there's more job security. i love history and the humanities as a whole, but i might struggle with employment.

i'm semi-familiar with the path i would need to take to become a doctor. i would have to make it into med school (high GPA, experience in science research/labs, shadowing healthcare professionals, good recommendations, etc.), survive med school, survive residency (during which residents are worked like dogs), complete fellowships, and then i would be able to practice independently. and that would probably occupy the majority of my time. people have told me that med school is hard even for people that like medicine. for me who is just tolerating it, can i do it? and what about any future patients? is it fair to them?

my mom has always said that i could just get my second degree in whatever i wanted after i became a doctor, but i don't know if i would have the mental strength/energy/free time to go back to school after med school. i feel like if i grit my teeth and bared it for all my twenties i would lose the drive to do it my thirties. it feels like i've been putting off my living my life for my entire life. in middle school i thought about high school, in high school about college, and in college about post-graduate life. i'm tired of this constant look towards the future, but it's the only thing i know how to do. my brain is constantly asking "okay, and then what?"

if i go to med school and realize that i really can't do it, then i'll be trapped. it'll be too much debt to walk away from, too many years of my life dedicated towards that end goal of becoming a doctor. i feel like if i'm going to change my future plans, i should do it before sooner rather than later. 19 isn't too late to walk back but 26 might be.

but it's not like pursuing a career closer to what i want would be easier.

there's always this big fear in the background of, what if i fail? what if i risk it all to go to law school and i don't make it in? or i end up in a low-paying law job saddled with hundreds of thousands in student debt? or even if i make it to biglaw, i still end up burned out from all the hours that they work? wouldn't i still be miserable? i'm not super familiar with how law school works but i've done some lurking around @artielu's blog and law seems like something i should also go into in only if i'm sure.

(i'm not. i'm not sure of anything really.)

it feels like no matter what i'm going to be unhappy in the future. maybe everyone feels this way, maybe a certain level of unhappiness is normal in adult life. it just makes me feel so frustrated because i'm struggling so hard for what? idk. i'm also so desperately scared. i'm scared that one day i'll wake up in the my forties/fifties and realize that i hate my life. maybe i'll look back on this and lament how spoiled/whiny i was. idk. idk.

i'm not looking for an answer to this dilemma, i know this is a decision i'll have to make for myself, but i would appreciate any advice or even words of encouragement. thank you.

Welp. Okay, first of all, I am giving you a big virtual hug and sitting you down at your coffeeshop of choice. So imagine us talking there.

Second, thanks for pouring out your heart to me about this and your various other comments and chats over the years. I only know you as one of my favorite (shh) Tumblr anons on the internet, but I have always seen how thoughtful, smart, and hard-working you are, and I don't take it lightly that you trust me to listen to you and to give you good advice. (Or uh, let's hope, at least not bad advice? Jury's out.) Likewise, I'm absolutely sure that immigrant-child guilt is something to which a lot of my followers can very much relate, and would be happy to talk with you about. So if you are one of said followers and you'd like to encourage anon to reach out to you, please drop a note in the replies! I can't speak to this from personal experience, but I'd love to help connect you to others in your situation. Because yes, it IS absolutely a universal struggle for first- or second-gen immigrant kids: balancing cultural expectations of parents, American opportunities, feeling guilty if you do what you want, etc etc.

Third, and this is just me talking: if you absolutely feel this way, then no, I don't think you should go to medical school. I realize that this is far easier said than done, but if you continue to feel this strongly about it, then... you shouldn't be expected to do it, and that's just something that everyone in your family will have to come to terms with. After all, your parents came to America so you could be raised as an American, and there would be multiple pathways to success -- not whatever just they themselves had to do in order to get here in the first place. I'm afraid that you'll eventually have to bite the bullet and have an honest talk with your parents about this, but it may help if you present this as both your own success and THEIR success. After all, you're smart, talented, you have so many options, and you'll clearly succeed at whatever you choose to do. And that means THEY did their job right: they worked hard, they raised you right, they brought you to a place where there ISN'T just one narrow pathway to having a fulfilling and prestigious career. It doesn't mean they "failed" to make you a doctor. It means they succeeded in making YOU, and opening up so many more things for you to do.

Obviously: that's going to be hard either way, your parents are probably going to be upset, and that's very tough to deal with, especially if you're a close family unit and if you're financially dependent on them. You're the only one who can choose when to have the conversation and what might come of it, but it's still something that you do have the right to do. If you want to research other aid options or scholarship packages, or reach out to financial aid/admissions officers at other schools to see what it might take to transfer (that is, if you need to transfer), that's your right to do. You're an adult now and you have the right to take legal and personal responsibility for your own life. If you know what you want to do and how you want to do it: then again, isn't that why your parents came here? Isn't that what they were working to achieve?

Yes, academia is hard. No, there's no guarantee of getting a job. But there isn't the guarantee of getting a job in medicine either, especially if it's something you're forcing yourself to do and which (as you note) would impact negatively on you, your colleagues, and the patients you would be expected to serve. Especially post-Covid and in the American healthcare system: being a doctor/nurse/healthcare professional SUCKS! Even if you like it and feel called to do it, it still sucks, and the only people earning a lot of money from it are the senior/career/specialist types (as is the case in every field). Of course your parents have expectations and dreams for you, but they also don't get the right to control/dictate your entire adult life just by virtue of deciding to bring you into the world. After all, they did that, and that means embracing you as a person with your own choices. (And this goes for all people with controlling/bossy parents, regardless of immigrant or non-immigrant background). So again: this is what they wanted for you, and you've paid that off already.

I absolutely feel the "I spend all my time thinking/worrying about the future and being scared that I'll end up wasting my life" thing, which I think is common to a lot of high-achieving smart people (we are terminal overthinkers to a one). I can tell you now that life has a way of surprising you, and when you get a little older, you start becoming more comfortable with yourself, your accomplishments, your talents, and knowing what you're good at. So I don't think you will find that you've wasted anything. Likewise, when it comes to studying for advanced degrees in history: do you think it might help with your parents if you agreed to pursue a name-brand school? It's still not guaranteed, but trust me, going to a place like Harvard or Yale makes it tremendously easier to get a job or a future opportunity just by virtue of having that name on your CV and the people you will meet, and I have no doubt that you would be able to get in. As well, I don't really think your parents could argue with you going to an Ivy League, or think that you weren't applying yourself.

Likewise, if there is anything I can do to support you in this, please feel free to message me privately/off anon. I will write a letter of recommendation for you, I will see if I know a person who knows a person, I will help look at application materials, so forth and etc. I mean it: I WILL help you in the real world if I possibly can. I'm sure you have tons of other enthusiastic recommenders, but still. Also, I will say that despite the current (terrible) academic job market, I have seen quite a few openings for professors of African history/African studies/African-American literature and culture, and that's just in the US. There are also lots of opportunities around the world.

Anyway: I hope that's helpful to start with. I am giving you all the hugs. Please reach out to me again (especially via private message) if I can help with this in more tangible ways. And likewise, if any of my followers would like anon to reach out to them: please make a note in the replies. We can do this together.

<3

[rubberduckrobin]

Dreams of the future.

Pairing: Simeon X GN!Reader

Summary:

“ My heart beats out of my chest for them and I just can’t help it. Is it love?”

Y/N has been invited over for a sleepover at Purgatory hall, with Luke, Solomon and Simeon, but Simeon struggles concealing his newfound feelings for them….

Read Simeon’s perspective as he falls deeper in love with them…

Word Count: Around 4k

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49380574/chapters/124613413

Author's note: Heyyy, idk what to say…um….yeah. 🤷‍♂️ Enjoy reading!

TW: Nothing I can think of.

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Part 1: My heart is beating and I know why.

I didn’t get a good night's sleep last night. I guess the issue was anticipation. I have to admit it, I'm so excited. Luke has been so pumped up for this sleepover and I suppose it’s rubbed off on me…

The more I think about it, the more I can’t think at all; all of the words inside my head seem to jumble to form images of what may be the future or what may not be; and I just have to sit there an comfort myself that i’m not going to make a fool of myself in front of them.

Y/N was invited. Is that the reason that whenever I think about it, it's with not only feelings of excitement but also fear? Are they the reason that my heart pounds whenever I think of them staying over, or just the thought of them at all? 

I don’t know much about love. In the Celestial Realm, all I knew was to value kinship above everything else. Not once have I felt the sensations I felt, to quite the extent, from just standing near them. 

My heart beats out of my chest for them and I just can’t help it. Is it love? I didn't notice these feelings until the idea of the sleepover came up. It was Luke's idea to plan this, and looking back on my motives to go along with it, I now realise that I agreed with the sole purpose of getting to spend more time with Y/N. 

It’s unusual how I was so blind to the sensations I felt in my body before. How could I have not noticed my strong longing to hold them in my arms, intertwine our fingers, pepper them with soft kisses. 

It’s foolish, I know. Solomon told me the same. He’d noticed long before me, and I only just noticed this now. He’d told me that it was obvious that I held a special place in my heart for Y/N, and that I was a fool in love who didn’t know yet. He said it teasingly, but perhaps it was right. 

Perhaps I'm really falling for them. Or perhaps I already have. I’m not used to this. How can I remember what I felt like before? It's like when you're sick, the sensation prevents you from remembering what it's like to be healthy. Oh, that would make more sense of the expression “lovesick” then. I guess I'll need a doctor, hehe.

The doorbell is ringing…my heart is pounding…

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Part 2: I can no longer think without a thought of you.

Luke, Solomon and I welcome them at the door and seeing their smile makes me feel more at ease, remembering how many other days they had spent at Purgatory Hall. Not overnight, however, but it surely can’t be too much of a difference; even though they will be sleeping over, they will be sleeping in Luke’s room once we are all tired enough to declare the night’s events over. 

I realise that (in a hidden disappointment ) perhaps it's best that Solomon and I retreat to our own rooms. Luke may be an angel who has lived for more than the average human does, but he is still a child in angel standards, and being an angel alone can also put someone at ease, so I'm sure Y/N would be more comfortable sleeping with just Luke. Luke is overjoyed, of course. He’s really taken a liking to them, and I think he sees them as his best friend. This is the happiest I've seen him and I'm glad.

I wonder how Y/N charms so many people. Solomon has been stolen by their charms too, and being honest, it makes me jealous. He’s much more forward and flirtatious than I am and sometimes I just have to hope that Y/N hasn’t fallen for him before me. If I even had a chance, that is. 

If there’s even the slither of possibility that whenever Y/N sees me their heart beats at the same rapid pace as mine, and that they feel jittery at just the slight brush of our shoulders, then perhaps maybe I would indulge in a more open expression of my feelings for them. 

When my eyes meet theirs I see the realm of possibility that they share my feelings. But when they look away, I can see it shatter, and I can feel the thumping in my heart when they tell me that they can’t accept how I feel for them, outcasting me. Neglecting me for Solomon, perhaps. 

Yet again, my heart doesn't allow this, and desperately tries to pull me closer to them, my lips to part and for me to just…say it. Tell them that i've never felt this way about someone before. Tell them that I want to hold them in my arms, intertwine our fingers and pepper them with soft kisses. Tell them that I don’t want them to smile at Solomon, or Luke, or anyone else, only me, and that we would dance in my dreams forever.

We’ve now made it into the kitchen. Of course, all of the previous thoughts were momentary, however not once has it escaped the back of my mind. 

Luke says “Do you guys want to bake cupcakes for our first activity? I brought the ingredients!”

I catch a glance at Y/N and they seem eager, so I reflect that on myself too, hoping that they could find the similarity between us, and want to search for more. 

We start to prepare. Luke preheats the oven. I start to crack the eggs that had been left out to set while I watch in the corner of my eye Y/N and Solomon, too close for my own comfort, and they smile at each other and my heart hurts. They take out the ingredients from the fridge and their hands meet as my own clench, not in anger, but regret in knowing I haven't been working hard enough to have a closer bond with Y/N. 

I tell myself I'm getting too worked up and need to focus on just having a good time. 

So I do just that. 

When we are all mixing the ingredients in the bowl, I take the opportunity to ‘flirt’ a little with Y/N. I put my hand in the flour bag and as I took it out, I flicked it on their face. They flinch a little and I start to feel bad, but then I notice that beautiful smile of theirs again, and it gives me courage to keep going - I grab a bigger amount of flour and chuck it at them, but of course not too much to waste it, and this time it ends up all over their face, including right to the tip of their nose, and I find it absolutely adorable. So much as to stupidly comment on it:

On the tip of my tongue, the words slip out and I catch myself saying “you're so cute” mid-way from what seems to be a giggle. 

I didn’t intend to make things awkward but an inevitable solitary gap follows. In order to ease the awkward tension, I laugh and scratch at the nape of my neck. 

Solomon notices and joins along too, taking some flour and throwing it at me. I inhale the powder and sneeze a little. 

“Revenge” he says, with that classic, seductive smirk. If I hadn’t fallen for Y/N first, I'd probably be head over heels for this man. 

Luke joins in with the fun too, and takes a dainty amount of flour, presumably not to waste any more, and throws it at Solomon. Solomon turns around and pulls a fake angry face, but Luke takes it a bit too seriously and gulps. I notice this so I step out and gave him a good pat on the head to let him know we were just playing, but little did he know that I had flour all over my hand! 

Solomon points this out, we laugh and by the time the cupcake mixture is in the mould, I had forgotten my negative thoughts from earlier.

Y/N still has a bit of flour on their cheek…I lick my finger subconsciously and wipe it off…

Thank the celestial realm that no one else saw…well, except for Y/N…they turn away and their face reddens…I'm worried I may have made them uncomfortable, or even angry. 

“Oh…! I-I’m sorry.”

But before I can catch their response, everyone's attention turns to the oven as it pings, letting us know that the cupcakes are ready. 

“Guys guys! Look~! They look great don’t they!” Luke exclaims while taking them out of the oven. The cupcakes are a sort of golden-brown colour and they look absolutely delicious. 

“Shall we decorate them?” Solomon suggests. I have to agree that they do seem plain. 

I turn to Y/N who seems to have decided to ignore what happened, and me in the process, and they seem pretty enthusiastic to decorate the cupcakes.

And I now feel the same. 

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

Part 3: Setting the mood.

It’s been a long day. 

I’m not necessarily tired, but it seems as though Luke definitely is - he dozed off within the first few hours of our film marathon. So, we have decided to move to my room, so we don't disturb him. 

Once we get there, Y/N immediately makes a beeline towards my bed, and I can’t help but blush. Seeming relaxed, they leap onto it and sigh. I’m glad they don’t feel self-conscious about the fact that they are in my room for the first time. 

“Oh…sorry! I see a bed and I run to it, haha…” They go to stand up but I assure them it's fine, and it's exactly what we were doing in Luke's room in order to watch the film on Solomon’s D.D.D. 

We all sit on my bed, and lie down with Solomon in the middle, phone in front of us. Every now and then, my eyes drift towards Y/N from across us, and I see them intently watching the movie. I’m not too keen on this sort of movie, but it was their suggestion so Solomon and I thought we should try it; don’t get me wrong, it’s not too bad, but i’d rather admire Y/N…I didn’t intend for that to be creepy in any way, but i suppose it does seem like that. 

The film has ended now, and Solomon gets up and stretches. Through a yawn, he says “I’m starting to feel knackered, so I’m gonna go to bed early. Although, I do have a film recommendation for you!”

“But won’t you want to watch it too?” Y/N makes a good point. I sense an ulterior motive to what Solomon is doing…

“Nah. I’m good. I’ve seen it too many times to count. Let me know what you think in the morning. Good night!” And with a casual wave, he’s gone to his room. 

That sly sorcerer. I know what he’s doing. You can already tell by the title of the film: it’s a romance.

However, Y/N seems eager to try, and I'm not tired so I suppose I'll do it for them…

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Part 4: Romance movies set the mood. How I would like to kiss you…

We are mid-way through the film now, watching on my D.D.D now, of course, and the romantic progressions are starting to show. The main character has finally admitted their feelings for him, but he is oblivious to his own. (I’m starting to see why Solomon chose this one specifically…)

Now…she kisses him. I shuffle in my position. I’m starting to feel a bit awkward sitting next to Y/N, and my heart starts to beat faster than it was before. I wonder if they feel the same way. 

Maybe I should just tell them. In fact…I will.

As the kissing scene gets more passionate, I sneak a glance at them…

They are fast asleep. 

I don’t mean to think this in an unsettling way, but they are even beautiful when they sleep…I watch the rise and fall of their breath, only for a moment, despite it feeling like eternity. They look so peaceful. I wonder what they are dreaming of. Of me? Or of a blank canvas. 

I’m disappointed I wasn’t able to tell them how I felt. There’s always tomorrow, I guess.

I turn off my phone and we are submerged in darkness momentarily before my eyes adjust. I carefully get off the bed in order not to disturb them, and I just stand there a moment. Only for a moment, I see what could be. I see my hand in theirs, their heart for mine. 

I cover them with my duvet. 

As much as I wished I could sleep beside them, I know that it would be inappropriate. Despite the fact that they look so cosy and warm, I must fight my desperacy to stay beside them. 

I try to settle on my settee, ready to sleep. 

I eventually drift into a light slumber… 

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Part 5: I’m ready to sleep, knowing i’ll see you in my dreams.

Even in my vacancy of consciousness, my mind still wanders to the thought of them. Their smile, their laugh…

When I close my eyes I think of them, I dream of them. I see them in idle scenarios made of coffee shops and dancing in the rain. They make me feel as though I am in a dream in itself, never wanting to wake up from my lovesick acoma. 

My dreams are of what I could have said or done with them, but they are also made of what could possibly be. Dreams of the future. 

In the darkness of my shut eyelids I see their silhouette in colours; colours of beauty and gold. I find myself tracing the outer lines of their shadows that stayed with me from the day and the remnants of memories that I spent with them. 

Solomon is right…I do hold a special place in my heart for them.

I think I love them.

I love Y/N…

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Part 6: Hazy mornings, hazy dreams.

I wake up - there’s no way to tell whether it's daytime, being in the Devildom and all. 

It’s difficult to see, so I tumble off…oh. Right. I slept on my settee. That explains the sudden back ache I have. After I'd lazily slumped off, rubbing my hazed eyes, I stretched a little, and a yawn escaped me. 

I go to check the time on my D.D.D when I hear a noise…

“Simeon…” 

From under the constraint of my duvet, I can hear their faint lethargic breaths. Y/N seems to still be asleep.

I’ve only just taken in what I had just heard…my name? 

I must be mistaken.

But I heard it again. This time, louder and clearer, as though they knew I was trying to listen. Or maybe because they were calling out for me. 

Does this mean…they are dreaming of me, too? 

Tell me universe, is this a sign? I don’t believe my own heart when it tells me it is. I suppose I can’t trust anything but their own words.

If they are dreaming of me, I wonder what it’s about.

“I…”

Hm…? I listen intently to see if they add anything.

“I really love…”

Love? They love what? 

“Please…”

No no, Y/N…finish…I subconsciously make my way towards my bed, and sit on the end. I look at their face; before admiring their features as I normally do, I notice that their expression is content, in a light smile.

“Come closer…”

For a second, I almost believe that they are talking to me. 

Perhaps I should stop listening…

“Simeon…?”

Oh lord. 

“Why am I in your bed? …oh yeah. Um…thank you…wait…where did you sleep?!”

They leap up suddenly, and it makes me jump a little. I can feel my cheeks heat up at just the thought of what they were implying.

“O-oh! No, I slept on my settee. I promise.” 

I hold out my pinkie to them.

“It’s alright…”

And for a moment, I swear they say under their breath, the words I wanted to hear…“I wouldn’t have minded”, but maybe it was my imagination at work again.

They rise out of my bed and I get up to turn on my bedside lamp.

“Thanks.”

We are both wearing the same clothes as last night. Luke was the only one who had put on pyjamas, the rest of us had just remained in our lounging clothes. 

Y/N gasps, seemingly looking at their reflection on the camera app of their D.D.D (how did they even get it to face them? i’m not good with technology…).

I take a sudden fleeting moment to look at them under the warmth of the light and I notice their horrendous bed hair…not that it makes them look bad, of course, I'd never even dream it possible…but the hair itself has become so tangled it creates an almost abstract appearance that I’d deem it an entire otherworldly being…okay, that was an exaggeration, but their reaction compliments my description well.

I have a sudden thought. Whilst they are checking their D.D.D notifications, I swiftly open my drawer and retrieve my comb. I remove my own stranded hairs from it, discard them and approach Y/N. 

With sudden confidence, I catch their attention by tapping them lightly on the head with the comb. 

“Here, you can borrow this.” I say with a polite smile, and they turn to me and my confidence vanishes in an instance. And there it is, their smile…

“…oh! Thanks, Simeon. True lifesaver, I forgot mine.”

I watch them put their D.D.D down and struggle to get the knots out of their hair.

“Um…Y/N…would you like some…help?”

How I would love to brush their hair. I guess sometimes my thoughts escape my mouth before I even realise it.

After some consideration, they say “…yes.”. I’d imagined the opposite. I’m relieved.

They hand me the brush and sit on my armchair and I think to myself “Good heavens…why is my heart beating so fast? I’ve brushed Luke’s hair before and it was alright. Although I suppose the circumstance is different, seeing as I consider Luke a younger brother. 

And Y/N…well…I’m hoping I’ll someday have the ability to consider them something more than just a friend…and maybe, that day will be today, if I regain the courage I had last night.

As I stroke through their hair with my comb, we remain in a comfortable silence. 

I get the sudden feeling that perhaps now I should tell them. They would be leaving soon, and I most likely wouldn’t be seeing them until the next week…

I’m going to do it. I’m going to tell them-

“Hey…Simeon…”

“Um…yes?”

“Did I…snore last night?”

Oh my god, why did they have to do that to me - I thought my heart would burst out of my chest there and then! 

But now I notice my own disappointment and my heart sinks. 

Through strained nervous laughter I say, “Haha, no, no you didn't…,” Should I bring up the sleep talking? Too late…”,but you did talk in your sleep…”

“Oh gosh! Really!” They turn to me as I finish off the last section of their hair. I ran my fingers through it to make sure I didn’t miss anything…it’s as soft as I’d thought it would be.

I would say that their hair is one of my favourite things about them..but it’s an impossible choice out of millions of other things…Although, if you’d forced me to pick something of them all, my ultimate favourite would be their smile.

Knowing that they are happy makes me happy. Is that selfish? Or perhaps because it also helps them be their utmost self, showing off their other millions of favourable traits. 

“Mhm, yeah…”

“What did I say?! I better not have said anything embarrassing!”

I finish messing around with their hair and go to put my brush in their drawer. 

An angel must strive to be honest, so I tell the truth. However, is it okay to admit that I mainly told the truth because I greedily wanted to know what they would say upon hearing that they dreamt of me? 

“You…said my name” I nervously rub the nape of my neck again and avoid their gaze, although there wasn’t much left to avoid, as they looked at their feet shyly. 

“Wait…really? That’s so embarrassing!”

“If it helps, you didn’t say much other than that.” 

“Still!”

They look at me through the dimly lit room, their eyes sparkling and I just melt.

“…do you remember the dream?”

I add a teasing tone slightly, in order not to reveal too much of my interest.

“…no…”

That was definitely a lie; they averted eye contact again…it’s so adorable. However, I still don’t know for sure whether their dream was of the sort I would want it to be…

I won’t push them. 

“Anyway, Simeon, how did you sleep?”

I notice that they are trying to change the subject. It shouldn't bother me too much, seeing as they must be doing it because they are uncomfortable, but it irritates me slightly that I will never know what the dream was about. 

“That’s very sweet of you, I slept alright, thank you. And you?”

“Um…yes. Very well, thanks. Uhm…I'm sorry I took over your bed last night…”

“No problem. I’m alright with it.” 

Before we finish with the conversation…a smell of smoke arises from the halls, and presumably coming from the kitchen.

As though a part of the same mind, we simultaneously scramble outside to find out what's happening…

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

Part 7: Why in Celestia did I let Solomon cook?

“Solomon!”

I shout out, half in shock and the other in momentary anger. 

“Whoops.” 

He slides a cheeky grin as he backs away from the burning pan.

Luke is on the verge of tears and frantically swatting away the smoke with a cookbook. 

“It’s alright Luke. Nobody’s hurt, right?”

I observe Solomon and Luke and they don’t seem to have any burn injuries or much affect from the smoke. 

Y/N makes a very valid statement of “So, I’m guessing the Devildom don’t have fire alarms? Because of it being hell and all? …Perhaps we should ask Lord Diavolo for a special installation…”

“Good idea.” We need a better warning of Solomon cooking, than smoke. This man…he’s a renowned famous sorcerer, who can do almost anything…but he can’t even fry an egg without creating toxic, hazardous fuel!

“Solomon..step further away fromt he frying pan…that’s it…further…”

Y/N seems to be enjoying this.

It’s a hilarious dilema, I have to admit. 

“I was just trying to make breakfast for everyone, but then this happened…”

“How do you manage to do this every time…?” I sigh, knowing that sometimes the impossible is possible with sorcerers. 

“No clue. Honestly.”

Luke generously offers to make us a new breakfast, still slightly shaken. 

After we finish our luckily non-hazardous breakfast, I sense that Y/N might need to leave soon…

I’ve decided won’t let them until I've told them. Told them how I feel.

Easier said than done, most likely, but I'll try my hardest. Starting…now.

“Hey! Y/N, can we talk for a bit?”

Solomon shoots me an all-knowing glare and discreetly gives a thumbs up. Perhaps I was wrong to be suspicious of him. After all, he’s one of my best friends - he’d only want what's best for me. 

“Um…sure!” 

Noticing how forward and sudden my suggestion was, I tense a little, but I'm not going to give up just yet. 

“…can you come with me?”

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I take them to the garden. I find comfort here, amongst all of the non-judgmental flowers. It also creates a romantic setting, if I were in need of such a benefit…which would be befitting for now. 

Amongst the rows of pretty flora, my vision sets on only Y/N under the Devildom’s pale morning moonlight. 

Somehow, it makes them even more beautiful. 

“What did you want to say, Simeon?”

“I… just wanted to let you know that…”

They sit on the floor under a gazebo, conveniently placed in privacy behind a brush of roses, and I join them. 

“I need to tell you this in order to be completely honest with you…I don’t want to mislead myself any longer so I'm relying on an answer, however there is no pressure for one…

I’ve been experiencing feelings that I've never felt before, and I found them in you. I think I’ve fallen for you…”

They’re a little shocked, but under the blue light and the shadows cast by the glare, I see that smile again. The one I’ve made my new joy. 

“I feel the same, Simeon.”

My heart flutters but this time it's brought with it a new emotion…of hope.

I’d dreamed of idle scenarios, where Y/N and I would spend our time in coffee shops, dance in the rain, no mind of what others perceive. To hold them in my arms, intertwine our fingers, pepper them with soft kisses. 

It will take some time…but perhaps my dreams can come true.

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End author’s note: Thank you so much for readinggg! Feel free to send in requests & if you like, lmk if you enjoyed it. Have a great day/night :)

Oh! And a joke before you go…

How do angels greet each other…they say “halo!”

I’ll take my leave… 🏃‍♀️