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vettelsvee · 11 days ago

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COME WHAT MAY | Sebastian Vettel ✩₊˚.⋆ ACT I: LOSS OF MY LIFE [PREVIOUS PART] [NEXT PART]

come what may masterlist | formula 1 masterlist

Red Bull Sebastian Vettel x Red Bull intern & Webber girlfriend!Reader

SUMMARY: During 2010 RB6 presentation and preseason testing, Mark starts acting quite weird with you. To your surprise, Webber gives some opinions on your work that start making you overthink, even when Seb tries his best to calm you down. You know 2010 season is going to be a hell when Webber asks to have a private conversation with Christian Horner and Helmut Marko.

WORD COUNT: 3695

WARNINGS: Angst, curse words and bad language, toxic relationships involving mental abuse and manipulation, such a toxic Mark Webber, mentions of death and suicide

TAGLIST: @hc-dutch @raavadakedavra @coffeedestroyingperson @evey-kuznetskova @bowielovesyou @chaoswithus @isotopemylove @iceman-kazansky @residentdemonhunter @astronomyandfrogs @herdetectivetheorist @prttylight @i-love-sirius-black7 @dreamauri @03071987 [feel free to join the taglist!]

VEE'S NOTES: I didn't post this earlier because I wasn't in a good mood after the prologue wasn't pretty liked to be honest, but here I am! Sorry for the delay, and if you read this hope you like it <3 ↳ TALK TO ME / REQUESTS! | FORMULA 1 MASTERLIST

Jerez, Spain 10th February, 2010

You hadn’t received a single call from Mark since the day you last spoke to him. In fact, you hadn’t expected him to call, but that didn’t stop you from feeling disappointed.

The only thing you got from your boyfriend was an endless string of missed calls, followed by the sound of his voicemail, his pre-recorded voice telling you to leave a message and that he would call you back later. And you did leave messages, knowing full well you wouldn’t get a response.

Instead, it was Seb who spoke to you every day.

The German hadn’t said anything else during that fateful dinner that should have been a refuge for both of you; nor did he bring it up for the rest of his stay in Linz or even when he was back in Heppenheim. Even though you had agreed not to see each other again until it was time to fly to Spain for the presentation of Red Bull’s new car, the RB6, Sebastian never stopped worrying about you. He called you daily; he was the first to hear about your grades from the penultimate semester of university, and sometimes, you even fell asleep while still on the phone with him. You both stayed up late talking, no matter how many times you promised to sleep early, only to curse yourselves the next morning for breaking that promise, despite knowing you would do it again.

You tried, with difficulty, to get some sort of call, message, or even a breakup and an explanation from Mark about why he no longer wanted to continue your strange relationship. You did everything you could to let him know that the team had contacted you, requiring you to be in southern Europe in February, but it was impossible.

The blue-eyed man who made your days easier, especially as your father’s health worsened and you were already grieving before the inevitable, not only showed interest and happiness that Red Bull Racing’s intern would be at the event, but he also offered to travel to Austria and stay with you for two or three days before the flight. He knew how terrified you were of flying and didn’t want you to go through it alone.

You didn’t see Mark or anyone from the team, except for the obvious Sebastian and his PR manager, Britta Roeske, during the two days leading up to the big event. That Wednesday, however, anxiety took over as you got ready in your hotel room. The feeling only intensified as you headed to the circuit with your best friend, realizing that you would have to face Mark.

It was barely ten in the morning, and the air was already thick with the persistent scent of burnt rubber, oil, and fuel, not to mention the noise caused by photographers, journalists, team members, and the occasional fan roaming around.

The RB6 had just been unveiled, and now, everyone was behind the cameras, hidden in the garages after dealing with the press. All that was left was to wait for the mechanics to finish the final adjustments before the first day of pre-season testing began, with both Webber and Vettel taking part.

Sebastian stood beside you, tucked away in a corner of the garage. His arms were crossed, and his eyes constantly moved, not out of nervousness, but out of an effort to stay in control of everything. He knew you would run into your teammate at any moment, and more than wanting to prevent an altercation, he didn’t want the Australian to create a scene big enough for others to notice.

More than anything, he didn’t want all of that to be another burden for you.

You, on the other hand, were nervous. Your hands fidgeted, grasping each other, playing with your hair, or clutching your jacket. Your eyes darted around, and each time a door opened or someone entered, your body tensed, only to relax upon realizing it wasn’t the person you dreaded seeing most.

It hadn’t even been a month since your last conversation with Mark, but enough time had passed for you to try to push it from your mind, or at least, to not give it so much importance. But you couldn’t. It still hurt to comprehend that he only called to demand explanations about your life and judge you, fully aware of how important Seb was to you, rather than to apologize for forgetting about you for weeks despite your insistence on staying in touch.

You gave up, but that didn’t make you feel any better. The only thing that comforted you was knowing that you had been there for Sebastian when he needed a friend the most. But what made you question whether it was all worth it was the fact that Mark had already made up his mind, and nothing you could say would convince him otherwise.

When you turned to look at the man beside you, and he gazed at you with a light in his eyes that you had never seen in your boyfriend’s, you knew you would endure a thousand more fights with Mark just to see Sebastian happy.

Finally, Mark appeared, his race suit half-unzipped. He started chatting with some team members, who seemed more than happy to see him after so many months.

As he cheerfully greeted each one of them, playing the part of the charming prince, Sebastian rolled his eyes. He couldn’t see his teammate the same way anymore—not after hearing him yell at you over the phone and, worse, manipulate you in ways you didn’t seem to notice.

“Y/N, you don’t have to talk to him right now,” Sebastian murmured, stepping closer to you.

You felt a shiver run through you but tried to stay in control. You saw Webber approaching, and by instinct, you moved closer to Seb, almost knocking him over. He wrapped his arms around you to keep you from falling.

“Sorry…” was all you managed to say, unaware of what he had just told you.

“Talk to him when you feel strong enough,” Vettel continued, his voice just as calm. “Take a deep breath, and think carefully about what you want to say.”

“No, Seb, I need to talk to Mark as soon as possible…”

“Y/N—”

“If he’s going to act the way he did on the phone or make passive-aggressive comments through veiled insults, I’d rather he say it to my face,” you declared. Then, sighing, you forced yourself to relax before walking toward your boyfriend. “I’m sorry…”

Sebastian sighed this time, and despite knowing Webber was watching, he hugged you. Then, glaring at the Australian, he gently cupped your face in his hands.

And oh, how he wished he could not only kiss you but also make you see that you deserved far more than the love Webber had made you believe you were worth.

“Be careful, okay? Mark… He knows how to hurt you.”

You nodded timidly before kissing his cheek, promising him that everything would be fine, even though you had no idea what would happen or how things between you and Mark would end.

Without saying much more, you started crossing the garage, trying to follow Mark’s steps. After seeing how you and Sebastian had been acting, the two of you, who claimed to be nothing more than best friends, Mark had decided to leave, holding back the urge to cause a scene that would land both you and him on the front pages of every Formula 1 gossip magazine… if that was even what he wanted, of course.

"Can we talk?"

You quickened your pace slightly and carefully grabbed Mark’s fireproof suit. He turned around, coming face to face with you, frustrated, maybe even disappointed. You knew he was angry, even though your voice sounded firm. At least, that’s what your body language was screaming.

"Oh, now you want to talk?" Webber laughed bitterly.

"Don’t start," you warned, raising your voice a little more than you should have. "I just want to clear things up because, since you didn’t give me the chance to do it on the phone, maybe now that I have you in front of me, you will."

"Let me remind you that you were the one who hung up the call after I… I don’t know… maybe started pissing you off by calling you out for hiding things from me?"

You tried to argue back, but you knew it wasn’t worth it. Instead, you stayed quiet, though you rolled your eyes just enough to let Mark know how impossible he was—and to irritate him in the process.

He wanted you to torment yourself, to let the guilt eat you alive until you admitted the truth—the way he saw it. And deep down, that was exactly what he wanted.

"Fine. Go ahead," the Australian finally conceded.

You took a deep breath, trying to stay calm before speaking.

"You accused me of things that aren’t true, Mark, and you know it. Seb was in Linz because he needed a break, okay? He needed to clear his head, disconnect from everything… He and Hanna had just broken up, and I offered to let him stay at my place for him, not for me. He needed support, and that’s what friends do."

"And out of all the people who could have been there for him, he had to choose you?" Mark scoffed, tilting his head slightly at your explanation. "That’s a bit strange, don’t you think?"

"It’s not what you’re thinking, Mark."

"Yeah, I know. But let me tell you, it’s pretty damn strange. And forgive me for doubting you, but isn’t it interesting how you’re always there when Seb needs someone? It’s almost like… like you want him to need you."

Your hands clenched into fists on instinct. You were quickly reaching your breaking point.

"I was just being a friend, you know? Not like you, who couldn’t even bother to pick up the damn phone once or even send me a single message since the season ended."

"Oh, so now this is my fault?" Mark pointed to himself, a smirk creeping onto his face.

"I just want you to know that I didn’t do anything wrong."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever you say. Do you know what your problem is, Y/N?" He stepped closer, forcing you to take a few steps back, not that it mattered, because he grabbed your wrists before you could escape. His grip was tighter than you would have liked. Even when you tried to pull away, he didn’t let go. "You always think you can fix everything. You think you can save everyone from whatever pain they’re going through. But I don’t blame you. Maybe it’s just your way of coping… making yourself feel better after your mother killed herself."

His words hit you like a punch to the gut.

You were speechless. Breathing became harder, and seeing became nearly impossible with the tears welling up in your eyes. Everything around you seemed to disappear, leaving only the man in front of you and the words he had just spoken.

Maybe it’s just your way of coping… making yourself feel better after your mother killed herself.

For years, you had convinced yourself that your mother had been sick, that you weren’t at fault for not being able to save her. That you weren’t to blame for not getting home earlier that day, only to find her lifeless on the bed. You had told yourself, over and over, that you were just another victim of that suicide.

"Mark, I… I didn’t…" The lump in your throat made it impossible to speak, and neither did the tears that spilled from your eyes. "I’m not seeing Sebastian… I only love you…"

The words slipped from your lips automatically, but you weren’t sure if you were trying to convince Mark… or yourself.

He only shook his head, trying not to laugh at how pathetic and ridiculous you must have looked to him.

"If that’s what helps you sleep at night, keep lying to me. But if you really aren’t cheating on me with Vettel, I suppose I’ll have to see it for myself."

"Hey, Webber! Quit messing around with your girl and get over here! Didn’t you say you had something really important to discuss with us?"

Both of you turned toward Christian Horner, who was standing at the door of one of the makeshift offices. Through the window, you could see Helmut Marko buried in paperwork while marking something on his phone.

"Yeah, of course! I’m coming!"

You felt a wave of relief as Mark turned his back to you and walked away, without another word, without even saying goodbye, heading toward that room. You wanted to argue, to keep insisting that you had nothing going on with Seb, but you knew it was useless. Nothing you said would change Mark’s mind.

All you could do was stand there, staring at the door he had just walked through. You tried to peek through the window to see what that sudden meeting was about, one you had heard nothing about, but you gave up when your boyfriend suddenly glanced in your direction. He shot you a knowing smile before pulling the blinds closed.

"Shit…"

Your stomach twisted into knots as you turned around, aimlessly walking through the garage.

"You’re scrunching your nose. A lot, I’d say," a voice, too familiar, spoke in front of you.

If it hadn’t been for the German standing in your way, you would have walked right into him.

Why did Seb always show up when you needed him most?

Maybe because he knows how much you’re being hurt… and he was listening to the conversation as well.

No, that was impossible. He had probably just been waiting around in the garage until they told him he could do another test lap.

"You know I always scrunch my nose when I’m mad." Seb raised an eyebrow, and you rolled your eyes. "He was talking shit about you, Seb."

"Talking shit about me? Or talking shit about you and blaming you for doing things with me that, by the way, we haven’t done?"

You hesitated. You didn’t know how to answer because, once again, he was right.

Mark knew exactly how to get into your head, how to manipulate you until you started doubting yourself. Meanwhile, Sebastian had somehow become your voice of reason when you felt like you were losing your mind.

"I feel like he thinks I feel too much, you know?" you admitted, dodging his question, dodging the conversation entirely. You didn’t want to talk about Mark. You just needed to get this off your chest. "Like I have some kind of savior complex…"

"Because you couldn’t save your mother," Vettel finished for you. You cursed yourself for letting him hear that part. "Jesus, Y/N, that’s complete bullshit. Not about your mom," he quickly corrected himself, stumbling over his words, "but him saying that. You just want to help people… maybe the way you wish someone had helped you."

"But you help me… My dad, my aunt, my uncle and, well, my sisters," you muttered. "But whatever. The point is, you try explaining to him that everything he says is complete bullshit."

"Honestly? I would if I thought it would do any good," he said. "But since I know he won’t change his mind, I’d rather not waste my time. I’d rather spend it with you."

You gave him a tired smile. Seb could tell you were trying to put on a brave face, just like you always did when things weren’t going well. At that moment, something deep inside him burned with the need to protect you from everything that hurt you.

That was how he had felt for the past few months, but he did his best not to show it, to try to ignore it… yet all he managed to do was make it grow larger and larger.

And that was exactly what scared him the most about yourself in that moment.

"Come on, let's go," was all he could say as, unlike Mark, Seb took your hand as if it were a delicate, breakable piece of porcelain.

"Where? The pretesting session is about to—"

"Fuck the pretesting session," he cut you off, not giving you a chance to say anything else.

Seb’s fingers intertwined with yours, and even though he wasn't entirely sure where to go or what to do, one thing was clear, he just wanted to get them out of there, far away from where Mark had once again treated you so badly.

As you crossed the paddock under the watchful eyes of some journalists, you ran into Britta Roeske, Seb’s PR manager and, in many ways, his savior… or even a second mother, depending on how someone looked at it.

The woman, perfectly dressed in her Red Bull uniform, wasn’t surprised to see you together, but she was surprised to see you that together. She couldn’t help but glance down at your still-intertwined hands and then back up at both of you, incredulous.

"Don’t you dare be late. Thirty minutes, Sebastian," was all she said.

"Seems like you don’t trust me," he answered with an innocent smile that, rather than a trick, seemed completely sincere.

"With her?" Roeske pointed at you, who merely shrugged and curled your lips into a small smile. "Not really, to be honest. Be careful and don’t do anything you’ll regret later."

Neither of you answered that, but you both knew exactly what she meant.

You continued walking in a comfortable silence around the circuit, getting further away from the paddock. Seb went along with what you jokingly called a "track walk rehearsal" until you reached a grandstand area. Once seated, you had a perfect view of the entire track.

"Thanks for everything," you murmured, pulling your knees to your chest and wrapping your arms around them. Seb, on the other hand, draped an arm around your shoulders and, noticing how cold you were, took off his jacket and placed it over you.

"You don’t have to thank me. I hate seeing you like this. Out of all the people in the world who don’t deserve to feel this way, you’re at the top of the list."

Neither of you said anything else. You simply smiled and, for the first time all day, without fear, leaned against Seb’s chest. Without hesitation, he wrapped his arms around you, pressed a kiss to your forehead and started playing with your hair as he always did.

"I don’t understand why he’s talking to Helmut and Horner," you broke the silence, sitting up slightly to look at Seb. "What could possibly be so important that they had to have a meeting today?"

"Yeah, I was wondering the same thing," he frowned. "To be honest, I don’t like it…"

"Do you think it’s about me?"

Vettel bit his lip at your question. He wanted to be honest with you, but at the same time, he didn’t want to make you worry more or overthink something that might end up being trivial.

"I don’t want to assume, but… Webber is the kind of guy who likes to control everything and, with that, do whatever it takes to stay in the spotlight," he commented, carefully choosing his words. "If he feels like he’s going to be the second driver again, like last season…" Seb hesitated before continuing, trying to find the right way to say it. "I don’t know, Y/N, maybe he just wants to twist the narrative to fit his paranoia."

He couldn’t lie to you. You didn’t deserve that.

You swallowed hard.

"Do you think he’s going to turn them against me?"

"I don’t know, but what I do know is that whatever he’s saying won’t change the fact that you belong to this team, that you belong to…"

My life, he thought without a shred of regret, but with too much fear to say it out loud.

"You’re smart, Y/N," he continued. "This is your second year with the team; your third with me. You know everyone here, and most of all, you know me perfectly. And if that wasn’t enough, you work harder than anyone, Rocky’s words, not mine, while also juggling university and taking care of your father and sisters."

"It’s just what I have to do…"

"If they don’t realize what an incredible person they have right in front of them, that’s their problem, not mine."

You lowered your gaze, unable to stop yourself from blushing.

"Why do you always know exactly what to say to make someone’s day better?"

"It’s not about making someone’s day better, Y/N. It’s just telling the truth about what an incredible person you are."

For the first time, you found the strength to look at Seb without feeling embarrassed. It felt… strange. You didn’t know what exactly, but you were sure that the way he spoke to you, the things he said, the way he looked at you…

It was as if Sebastian truly saw you as more than just a friend.

Once again, neither of you dared to speak.

Seb wanted to say a thousand things, but he knew it wasn’t the right moment. And when it came to you, you wanted to take things slowly, savoring every moment, and, most importantly, putting your well-being first.

You, on the other hand, had always seen him as your safe haven since you arrived at Toro Rosso in 2008. But now… it felt different. Maybe it was what you had been denying to yourself finally coming to the surface, the thing that had been there for about two years, back when Seb were still dating Hanna.

Maybe, the silence you were now sharing would, one day, turn into the confession neither of you had been brave enough to admit, to yourselves or to each other.

"Seb…"

"Come what may, okay?" Seb interrupted you gently, taking your hand and tracing small hearts on your skin. "Never forget it: I’ll be there, here, wherever… but with you. Come what may."

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heartfullofleeches · 1 year ago

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New y/n idea! How about a darling streamer.... but make it galaxy? Like, their either human or alien, and their a known streamer all across the galaxy! Maybe good picks for their yandere being mono or titus since (from what I remember) their the only known yanderes in space.

Ah! Cutie Alien Darling that travels across the galaxy for new adventures, settling down on earth and starting a new life exploring the wonders the world has to offer - streaming their daily activities as a sort of video journal for themselves and anyone who's interested in their journey. Human Yan's just think they're selling a bit for the most part and it's the most adorable thing-

Mono comes across their blog and see a kindred soul as they left home for the same reasons as darling, and crushes on them hard for how their lights light up at every little thing. Speedruns their human body so they can attend conventions Darling ventures to as well and meet their idol in person. Darling would be so happy to meet another wandering soul and take them out to try their favorite foods, and show them their nick-nack collection. It takes all of Mono not to either propose on the spot or scoop them up and carry them back to their ship to explore the galaxy as the universe's power couple.

Alien would believe they're an alien 100% and sprints to any meet ups they have fully decked out in merch official or not if they haven't made any. Appoints themselves Alien Darling's guide to earth and takes them around the places they adore. Piggyback rides everywhere. Treats Alien Darling like absolute royalty and gushes like the dork he is about it's so great to finally have someone else like him on this hunk of dirt - but still keeps up the totally human act. It's also human custom to kiss your new guide and bodyguard with tongue so uh pucker up, please.

Titus watches their streams to find contestants for the arena, but falls for their bizarre, yet effective charms. Sends guards to monitor them from below while he spends weeks putting together the perfect outfit for his grand appearance. Gifts them the finest minerals from around the galaxy and offers to take them on a tour of the universe for their hand in marriage. Alien Darling gives him their favorite roll of holographic stickers and Titus moves the wedding to right then and there.

Alien Darling: Hey, guys! Welcome to day four of cataloging my rock collection from favorite to least favorite, and showing you my absolute favorites. There is no least favorite category because I love them all so I will be presenting them from A to Z by name. This one is Aaron-

Mono: [I thought I had full grasp of the concept of love before now..... It seems I was wrong.]

Alien: Hey! Did you know it's customary for humans to hold hands with new friends for a minimum of three hours?

Alien Darling: Oh! No, I didn't. [takes their hand] Thank you for telling me, friend :)

Alien, blushing feverishly: Never washing this hand again - Did you know we also touch lips and if anyone asks I am your boyfriend because I am a boy sometimes and we are friends.

Titus: For you, my dear. A necklace containing a vial of my blood - the most sought after prize in all the known universe. You are welcome.

Alien Darling: Thanks! Here's a candy necklace I bought earlier. I ate a few of them already, but it's still good-

Titus, internally: Heavens- I can't not fuck them.

#yandere oc #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere headcanons #yandere insert #yandere scenarios #yandere imagines #yandere blurb #yandere alien #yandere text #yandere drabble #alien my oc #Mono my oc #Titus my oc

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lonewolflupe · 8 months ago

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Echo Of Your Mind (One-Shot)

Help, I'm officially an Echo girlie now. Thanks to @nahoney22 for helping me cross that line with her one-shot That Floral Dress. I got inspired to write my own one-shot after reading hers, and finished it in two days (I may have neglected my sleeping scedule again). I should have focused on other things (like my job), but this gorgeous man doesn't leave my mind alone.

Besides this story being some appreciation for Echo, I dedicate this to all the anxious/introverted/super shy people out there. I feel you, I've been there (I still am), but I found my place in this galaxy. You'll find your place as well!

Summary: Your daily life in Ord Mantell City holds little purpose, and you try keeping away from the unsavoury types that roam the City's streets. But one day, a group of strangers piques your interest. You find yourself falling head over heels for one of them, despite your anxious and shy nature. Rating: Mature (or 16+ at least) Tags: anxiety, hurt/comfort, fluff, mutual pining, (eventual) romance, strangers to lovers, intimacy, sexual content (when becomes a story (mild) smut? help I'm new to this) Words: 7.829k (consisting of four parts) Pairing: Echo x Fem!Reader Read this one-shot here on AO3!

PART I | MORNING

19 BBY, Ord Mantell | Ord Mantell City

Ord Mantell City is a miserable place. To you, at least. You were born here, and are still residing here as an adult. You don't know anyone or any place else in the galaxy, for you've never been away from this forsaken planet.

Of course you have read about the war on the HoloNews, heard stories from seedy strangers roaming the city. But nothing of significance had happened on this planet, nothing that had affected your life. Now that Ord Mantell was under Imperial command, you find nothing much has changed. The place is still awful, and you prefer to remain near your home.

Sudden shouting from the upstairs neighbours disturb your thoughts. You sigh as you get up from the uncomfortable, worn out sofa in your living room, walking towards your front door. You grab a broom on the way and walk outside, taking in the sultry air that holds a grasp on the City.

Your porch is probably the cleanest of Ord Mantell City, since every time you need to clear your head, you find yourself sweeping it. Out of habit, you keep a lookout for any sinister individuals, ready to jolt back inside if you feel something is off.

Which has happened a lot, since Cid’s Parlor is located right across the alley. The bar isn't a crowded one, but most visitors provoke an unpleasant feeling inside you. There was a time during the war it got visited by elegant individuals in static robes occasionally, but times have changed.

The only usuals now are an Ithorian and a Weequay, lurking around the place on a daily basis. You had wondered if they didn't have anything better to do, places to be, only to realise this was Ord Mantell City; there wasn't anything better to do.

A shiver down your spine makes you look up. It is morning and the sun is up, but the narrow, dark alley is mostly lit by the neon signboards hanging from the adjacent buildings. They shed a light on a group of strangers as they come walking around the corner, into the alleyway.

Clumsily, you fidget with your residence’s keycard, nervous feelings taking over as you try to get back inside as quickly as possible. The front door whooshes open and you enter your home, making sure the door closes right behind you.

You take a moment to steady your breathing before walking towards the small, dirty window beside the front door. You clean it quite often, but the city's filth keeps finding its way back to it.

As you wipe some condensation from the inside of the window, you see the strangers halt right in front of Cid’s. You know you shouldn't keep lingering at the window like this; what if they spot you? But something about the strangers piques your interest, and you find it hard to pull away.

“This is the place,” you hear one of them remark in a determined way, before another responds cynically with: “Charming.”

The group consists of four adults, wearing mostly dark, battle-worn armour, their faces hidden behind intimidating helmets. In between them, there is a young, energetic girl with short, blonde hair. You raise a brow as you watch them descend the stairs into the bar, not averting your gaze until they disappear from your view.

With your mind racing, you find yourself strolling back to the sofa, sitting down when you reach it. You have never seen anything like these strangers at Cid's before, and you wonder what the Trandoshan is up to now.

Although obviously customised, their armour did remind you of the attire worn by clones, the former Republic's soldiers. You have never seen any with your own eyes before, but you remember seeing pictures and holovids on the HoloNet.

As your thoughts wander, you finally find something to do, distracting you from what you just witnessed. You continue your daily activities and leave the strangers to Cid.

---

During the following days and weeks, you get occasional glimpses of the strangers. They seem to have some business going on with Cid, because you can't imagine them revisiting the bar for its atmosphere. You even get some glimpses of the adults without their helmets, which only confuses you more. You thought they were clones, but they look nothing alike?

Since you have a lot of time alone with your thoughts, you find them on your mind more often. Who are they, where did they come from, did they fight in the war? Are they really clones, were they soldiers, and what are they now, perhaps bounty hunters? But what is the young girl doing with them? She looked happy and enthusiastic. What is a kid like her doing with such companions?

---

One of those days, you find yourself walking through the alley with some groceries in your arms. You hold everything together clumsily, admitting you're probably carrying too much in one go. When you finally make it to your front door, you reach for your keycard in your right pocket - only to find out it isn't there.

You scold yourself softly as you fidget through your pockets, hoping you just put it in a different one. Your groceries start sliding away, a piece of fruit falling on your porch and rolling away into the alleyway.

“Let me help you with that,” you suddenly hear a voice behind you. Eyes wide open, you look up in shock, previously unaware of the fact you weren't alone. You look right into the face of one of Cid's newest associates. Your breath gets caught in the back of your throat as you stand frozen to the ground.

The male walks up to you, the fallen piece of fruit in his hand. He puts it back with the other groceries, before taking the load out of your arms. When you don't move or reply, he takes a step back. “I'm sorry if I startled you,” he says whilst averting his gaze from you for a brief moment.

You look up at his face. It somewhat reminds you of what you've seen from clones on the HoloNet, but it isn't an exact copy. Pale skin, sunken cheeks, dark rims below his eyes. On the top of his head, you see numerous cybernetic implants, and bend around the back of his head is a metal headpiece. He definitely doesn't look like a typical clone.

When you look back into his eyes, you can see them filled with kindness, concern even. You regain yourself, as you don't want to come over as rude. “I-I’m sorry,” you stammer, your eyes darting back and forth as you don't know where to focus them, “I'm not really used to..”

“Clones?” he finishes your sentence, as you clearly didn't know what term to use. A comforting smile appears on his face, and you feel a bit more at ease instantly. “Well, social interaction in general,” you blurt out, immediately followed by a blush on your cheeks. He chuckles amused, as you shuffle on your feet awkwardly.

You suddenly realise you were in the middle of a keycard crisis, and you continue your search. It proves way more effective without any groceries blocking your arms, and it doesn't take you long before you find it - in a different pocket than usual, of course. You put the card in the slot and the front door whooshes open.

With a cautious smile on your face, you gesture to the clone to enter your very humble abode. He enters, and once inside, you pass him to show him a spot in your kitchen to put down the groceries. He manages without any more falling food, which you find rather impressive, given the fact how you had struggled with them earlier.

When he retracts his arms once the groceries are on the kitchen's counter, you notice one of them is partly machine. You freeze again, and the clone catches you staring at his mechanical limb. “Comes in handy sometimes,” he says jokingly, as he reaches out the scomp at the end of his socket-arm to show it to you.

You cannot help but laugh at his remark, lifting some of the tension. He smiles at you genuinely, pleased he was able to put you at ease. “Name's Echo, by the way,” he finally says. You give him your name in return. “Nice to meet you. I already thought I'd seen you before,” he says, as he looks at the window beside the front door.

You swallow as the blush on your cheeks reappears. You could slap yourself in the face; how did you think none of these trained men would notice you observing them, day in, day out?

“I, er- This isn't exactly the most safe neighbourhood around, you know, so I tend to keep an eye out,” you stammer, turning around to aimlessly rearrange your groceries. Echo chuckles, turning towards you again. “You don't have to defend your actions. It's your window, use it however you like,” he says, tilting his head slightly whilst observing you.

He thinks your shyness and awkwardness are endearing. In this vast, wild galaxy, sliding from the war into the Empire's cruelties, he rarely encounters innocence anymore. He notices you still hold yours, and he finds it soothing.

“Since you caught me.. ‘Using my window’,” you finally start saying, slowly as you consider your words carefully, “How can Ord Mantell City possibly be of any interest to you and your friends?” You regret asking immediately after your words are out, but Echo doesn't seem to mind.

“We just need to work some jobs to pay the bills, so to speak,” he replies casually, shrugging as if it isn't anything out of the ordinary for them. Of course you wonder what jobs and what bills he's talking about, but you would never dare to ask; your previous question was already quite bold for your standards.

So you don't inquire any further, but you gather all your courage to heed a warning. “Just.. Be careful around Cid. She's not the most.. Reliable individual around,” you say softly, afraid someone outside your home will hear it if you speak out louder.

Echo's lips curl into a smile, as he puts his hand on your arm for a brief moment. “Thanks for the heads-up, I'll keep it in mind,” he says, grateful for your concern. You finally find the heart to look up into his eyes, and you find yourself losing in them instantly. They are soft and kind, with a glister of confidence and certainty. But you cannot help noticing the pain, the hurt and the fatigue behind those eyes.

You don't know anything about this man except for his name, but the mixture of emotions in his eyes, the invisible scars you feel he is hiding, the unspoken reason why he's clearly on the run, it gives you the urge to comfort this man. A feeling deep down inside you, which you haven't felt before.

Of course you don't, because it would make you even more uncomfortable than before. You abruptly break your eye contact and turn around again, scolding yourself for your very own behaviour, but you can't help it; this is who you are.

Since you turned around, you cannot notice, but Echo's smile widens. You actually told him quite a lot by the words you didn't speak, by the way you did behave and how you just looked into his eyes.

Although he wouldn't mind staying for a bit longer, because he appreciates some quiet time away from the Batch and he finds it pleasantly soothing being around you, he realises you need some space, and he doesn't want to intrude on you any further. “Sorry for bothering you in your home, I'll be on my way,” he finally says, nodding at you in a respectful way once you've turned towards him again.

He walks over to the front door and pushes the entry button, and the door whooshes open. You rush after him, afraid he'll just disappear out of your life like that, but as always, you are lost for words. He walks across the alley, and just before he makes it to the stairs to descend into Cid's, you find your words.

“You- You aren't a bother,” you say shyly, as you hope he doesn't notice the blush on your cheeks from across the alley. He turns around, with a warming smile on his face, which makes you melt. You had no idea who these men, these clones were, but you definitely didn't think them to be the gentle kind.

“See you around then,” he says to you at last, making a very small salute with his scomp, before turning around again and disappearing down the stairs. You get back inside your home, and when the door closes behind you, you lean your back against it and let out a heavy sigh.

Who would have guessed any of Cid's visitors would awake such feelings inside you?

…

PART II | AFTERNOON

19 BBY, Ord Mantell | Ord Mantell City

It's been a while since you've seen Cid's latest associates, so you start to assume they moved on to find a new job, somewhere across the galaxy. An aching feeling inside you yearns for something you seem to have missed out on, something that could have been.

You sigh out loud as you lean back on your sofa. Your days were already long and lonely, but now it seems like they are even more meaningless. You wish you had the courage to get out into the galaxy, to be someone.

You suddenly hear sounds coming from the alleyway out front, and something tells you it's not your upstairs neighbours. With optimism you feel is misplaced, you dart over to the small window beside your door. You've been cleaning it on a daily basis since that one day, making sure you can get any glimpse possible whenever you peer outside.

Your heart skips a beat when you realise what - or who - made the sounds outside; it's Cid's associates. And Echo is still one of them. You pull away from your window to catch your breath, as a warm feeling starts emerging inside you again. He is safe, and he is in town again. You couldn't hope for anything more at this moment.

If only you had the courage to go outside. If he had been on his own, you might have dared to step outside, to walk up to him, but not with his friends around. So you stay put, awaiting a better moment patiently. You've become quite good at that.

---

It is only the next day when you catch him on his own. As you walk casually past your window (you weren't lurking around to catch any glimpse of him at all), you spot him as he comes walking out of Cid's and into the alleyway.

When he reaches the top of the stairs, he halts and starts rubbing his closed eyelids, his head slightly hanging. It looks like he is having a hard time, and your urge to comfort him reappears. You swallow as you gather all your courage.

This is your moment. If you loiter now, you might never get another chance again - let alone the courage. As you put aside all your thoughts and try listening to your heart for once, you push the entry button and your front door whooshes open.

Echo looks up at you, and a smile appears on his tired face as he is pleasantly surprised to see you. He utters your name softly, and a blush appears on your face; he had remembered your name.

“Would you- Would you like to come in for a caf?” you stammer, shifting on your feet as you await his answer. You don't have to wait long. “I would love a caf,” he replies, before crossing the alley, walking up your porch and entering your home. You can't help noticing he was taking big steps, almost running to your door, as if he couldn't wait to reach you.

Inside, you move aside a chair at your small table, inviting him to sit down. He does so gladly, and you walk towards the kitchen's counter to make a fresh pot of caf. Your mind races as you wait for it to finish, but Echo waits for you patiently, not in a hurry at all.

When the pot is finally ready, you pour two mugs and join him at the table. “I, er- I was afraid you weren't coming back to Ord Mantell,” you admit softly, whilst handing him one of the mugs. His fingertips touch yours for a very brief moment when he takes the mug from you; was that intentional? A warm feeling emerges in your head, and you're sure you're blushing - again.

“I appreciate your concern,” he starts, as he holds up the mug of fresh caf under his nose, inhaling deeply. He closes his eyes for a moment as he is appreciating the scent; he was clearly in need of it. He opens his eyes again, as they focus on you. “But you, er- You shouldn't worry about us,” he says with a wry smile on his face.

Seeing the expression on his face makes you do the exact opposite of his words; you start worrying. And now that you look at him, you notice he looks overworked and exhausted; he looks worn. You put down your mug, hitting the table harder than you anticipated, as you were putting all your emotions in that small movement. It startles you, and he chuckles in amusement.

“Really, there's nothing to worry about. We've been around and we know our way through the galaxy,” he reassures you, both his eyebrows raised as he slightly leans forward, towards you. Your heart skips another beat when you look at his gentle face.

Suddenly, his expression shifts to a confused one. “Why do you care so much?” he asks, shaking his head in his confusion, not sure why a stranger would worry about his well-being. But if he was being honest with himself, you didn't feel like a stranger anymore.

You swallow, your eyes darting back and forth again, searching for the right words. Your fingers fidget around the rim of your mug nervously. “You seem like a.. Like a good person. I don't see those around here often,” you finally falter, before looking him straight in the eyes.

The planet around you seems to die down when you lose yourself into his golden-brown eyes. They are the prettiest eyes you've ever seen, but then again, you've never stared into someone's eyes like this before. But you can't imagine eyes being prettier than his.

He puts his hand on yours, stopping the fidgeting, as your nerves make place for something else. Your heartbeat rises and your breathing becomes heavy. “Echo, I..” you stammer, but you don't finish your sentence. You have a hard time handling your feelings, not used to this kind of intimacy.

You jump out of your seat, accidentally knocking the chair over in the process. The noise of it hitting the floor startles you, and you do not notice Echo getting up as well. He gently touches your shoulder with his hand, and when you turn to him in surprise, he is standing right in front of you.

You've never been this close to him before. You see his eyes glisten comfortingly, his nostrils moving as he breathes, his Adam’s apple going up and down as he swallows.

Without thinking, you slowly shift your hand towards his cheek. Before you reach his skin though, he moves his head towards your hand, pushing his cheek against it, as he longs for your touch. Letting out a content sigh, he closes his eyes for a moment, and you see his eyebrows twitch in delight.

Now he finally feels your touch. You notice his chest heaving faster than before, and you realise that - maybe - he longs for you as much as you for him. You lick your lips and leave some space between them, making your heavy breathing more audible. It makes Echo open his eyes, as he yearns to touch those lips.

This time, he reaches his hand towards your face, and he gently caresses your cheekbone. His fingertips slide softly through your hair to the back of your head, and when he reaches it, he gently pulls you closer.

It feels like an eternity to reach each other, and your mind is racing. But all your thoughts are quieted down when your lips finally touch. You gasp as your breathing stops for a moment, your eyelids closing instantly as your eyes roll back.

Echo puts his mechanical arm around your waist, and with the utmost care, as not to hurt you with it, he pulls you closer. Your lips are pressed together, moving passionately against each other as you both finally give in to your longing.

You feel his breath on your skin and you let out a deep sigh, brushing his tender lips. He thinks yours are the softest, and he can't get enough of tasting them. As he indulges in you, you cannot help yourself by letting out a soft moan of pleasure.

He tightens his grasp around your waist when he hears your expression of content. He thought being apart from you was driving him insane these last few weeks, but now that he is finally close to you, he feels like he is losing it. Your innocence, your genuine and comforting soul, your beautiful appearance, your soft skin and your perfect lips..

Abruptly, he pulls away from you. He is afraid he will lose himself in you, going too far, ruining this perfect afternoon. He knows you'll need a little space after this, and he doesn't want to push you - although you might have complied if he'd asked for more.

Your eyes shoot open as you look at him confused; did you do something wrong? But his expression is all soft and loving, and you instantly melt by his sight. He leans forward to you again, but instead of kissing you, he gently puts his forehead against yours.

Not aware of the meaning - or even the existence - of a Keldabe kiss, you return the gesture anyway, as you think it's sweet. But to Echo, it means the galaxy.

After a long moment, the two of you pull away slowly. You wish it could have lasted forever, and Echo would have liked to hold you for a bit longer, but it had to end at one point. You look up at him, a loving smile on your face. He gently strokes your cheek with his thumb.

“Thank you, cyar'ika*,” he whispers, as he gently places a kiss on your forehead. You haven't heard that word before, and don't know what it means, but you're too caught up in the moment to spoil it by asking.

*cyar’ika = darling/sweetheart

At that moment, Echo's comm device starts beeping. He answers it without hesitation. “Echo, where are you? We need you to break a tie. Wrecker and I think Cid's next job sounds exciting, but Hunter and Tech.. Not so much.”

You see Echo's eyes soften as he responds to the girl. You'd like to hear more about his companions, but it seems like you have to wait until next time. You really hope there will be a next time.

Echo puts his comm device away before turning towards you, ready to apologise for his departure. But you beat him to it. “It's okay, go to them. Just- Just don't forget to come by whenever you're back in the City,” you tell him, as you put your flat hands on his chest armour. He puts his hand and scomp on top of your hands, as you swallow away the lump in your throat; you're well aware his coming back isn't a certainty at all.

He feels your worries, and although he knows he shouldn't be making any promises he can't keep, he wants to ease your mind. “I'll come find you,” he says determined, as he gently nods towards you. You smile back in return, gently placing a kiss on his cheek before you walk him to the front door.

Just before he reaches the door, you grab his hand. “Please, Echo.. Be careful out there,” you whisper, as he steps over your doorstep. He stretches his arm, keeping hold of your hand for as long as possible. “I'll do my best,” he replies, before letting go of your grasp.

You stand in your doorway, watching him cross the alley again, disappearing into Cid's. And after that, you keep standing in your doorway a little longer, hoping to catch another glimpse of him.

…

PART III | EVENING

c. 19/18 BBY, Ord Mantell | Ord Mantell City

As the sun slides away, looming shadows fill the alleyway. The neon signboards on the adjacent buildings cast their flashing lights about. The alley is empty, abandoned, apart from an occasional straying stranger.

You're lying on your sofa, your back aching from the uncomfortable hardness of it, but you don't have the will to move. Your thoughts wander as you gaze up towards the ceiling, thinking, hoping you will see him again.

As always, it's been a while. Echo has visited you a few times after that perfect afternoon, but his visits had been short; barely enough time to check on each other. You yearn to spend some more time together, maybe pick up where the two of you have left off.

But you know he is working a job with his squad, as you haven't seen them in a while. You put away your desires and hope he is doing alright. He told you not to worry, but you do worry a lot; you cannot help it.

---

You have almost dozed off when you hear excited voices coming from outside, immediately shaking you fully awake. Your body stiff, you manage to get up, and you stumble towards the window. Echo. A hopeful smile appears on your face as you finally see him and his squad again.

You still haven't mustered the courage to run outside to meet him as long as his friends are around, but you've grown a tad bolder; you push the entry button and your front door whooshes open.

As your heart races in your chest, a feverish feeling washing over you, you wait against the wall between the door and the window, out of sight. You're hoping he notices the open door and sees it as an invitation.

“Go, we'll manage Cid,” you hear a low voice from across the alley, a slight tone of amusement in the voice. Your heart skips a beat when you hear the sound of someone stepping closer and closer to your front door..

When Echo finally makes it to your doorstep, you spin in front of him and land in his arms, wrapping your arms around his neck. He is caught off guard for a moment, not used to you being this kind of initiative. But he doesn't mind; he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you closer, before kissing you tenderly.

When you finally pull apart, you look up to him, your eyes full of concern. “I-I was afraid something had happened,” you confess softly, almost in a whisper. He gently strokes your cheek before wiping a strand of your hair behind your ear. “I told you not to worry,” he replies, a bit stern, but his eyes soft.

You cannot help but scoff as you cross your arms, raising one eyebrow. “And you never worry about anyone?” you shoot at him teasingly. His expression softens. “All the time,” he says softly, before pulling you close again, continuing the kissing.

---

After your warm welcoming, you manage to get him some well deserved caf. As always, he doesn't give you any details about their latest job, because he knows your worries will multiply if you know what he's up to. And he doesn't want to drag you into the ugliness of the current state of the galaxy, as you're still as innocent as the first day he met you. And he loves you for it.

“So, er- how long will you stay this time?” you finally stammer, afraid he'll walk out again and he'll be off for another few weeks. Of course you meant to ask how long he and his squad would be staying on Ord Mantell in general, but he takes the leap.

“We're not gonna make new plans until the morning, so I'll have all night, if you'd like,” he replies, his soft smile sliding into a faint smirk as you see a sparkle in his eyes. You swallow; you really like his answer, but your nerves are playing up again, not sure what the evening will bring. And as always, you're lost for words.

Is it you, or is it getting hot in here? You're sure your head has turned red by now, and you need to cool down. You excuse yourself to him as you stand up, making sure to not knock over your chair this time, and walk towards your bedroom.

You open the door to the adjacent room, but something inside you decides to leave it open. You take off your thick shirt and slide into something more breathable.

When you turn around, Echo is leaning against the doorpost, his arms crossed and his foot bend around the other. You didn't turn on any lights when you entered your bedroom, so you cannot see the expression on his face. The only light comes from the room behind him, shedding a highlight around the contours of his body.

You freeze to the floor as you stare at each other in silence. Echo finally straightens himself, getting clear of the doorpost, and starts walking over to you slowly. Your heart skips a beat; you feel slightly vulnerable in your own bedroom, not sure how long he'd been standing there, watching you. But although you don't know how to go on from here, you definitely want it to continue.

When he reaches you, he starts caressing your cheek. You look up to his face, your eyes wide as they glisten, your lips apart in full anticipation. Before he reaches for them, you find your words. “I.. I’d like you to stay for the night,” you whisper shyly, yet honestly. There's nothing you want more at this moment.

“Then I'll stay,” he replies tenderly, a gentle smile on his face before he leans towards you, pressing his lips on yours. You close your eyes as you indulge into his kiss, forgetting everything around you.

After some passionate kissing, Echo slowly shifts his lips to your cheek, sliding down to your neck. You feel his warm breath on your skin, making something awaken inside you. His lips reach the spot between your neck and shoulder, starting with soft, tender kisses, but slowly evolving into something more confident, something more eager and desirous.

He is still very tender with you. Although he doesn't bite, you feel his teeth against your skin, the tip of his tongue dancing on you as he tastes you. A moan of pleasure escapes your throat, and you feel a shiver going through Echo's body.

He gently leads you backwards, towards your bed. You comply willingly, and when you reach it, you sit down whilst you guide him down as well, your hand grasped around the rim of his chest plate, below his neck. He kneels down before you, and you gaze into each other’s eyes for a moment before continuing.

“Are you.. Are you alright with this?” he asks softly, concern in his voice. But there is nothing he should be worrying about right now. You nod determined, a smile appearing on your face. “Yes, very much,” you finally muster, before you land another kiss on his lips. You feel his lips curl into a smile below yours.

You start fidgeting with his armour, but taking it off proves quite difficult, since you haven't interacted with anything like it before. He chuckles softly before aiding you in your conquest. When the pieces start coming off, and you start taking off his black jumpsuit, you pull away in shock and disbelief when you notice what you revealed.

“What did they do to you?” you blurt out, as your eyes wander his body, where you find mechanical ‘adjustment’ after adjustment. He swallows, slightly pulling away from you. He was so caught up in the moment, caught up in you, that he didn't think about this. Didn't think you would be taken aback by him.

“It's.. It's in the past,” he mumbles, averting his gaze from yours. A moment of silence, before he softly adds: “You can leave those on, if it disturbs you.” He reaches back for his blacks, but you stop him by grasping his hand. You cup your other hand below his chin, and gently guide his gaze back towards yours. “No, I'd like to have you like you are,” you say in a sweet way, and your words make him melt.

Taking your clothes off happens in a heartbeat, compared to Echo’s attire. Both your chests are heaving and your breathing is heavy with anticipation. As Echo slowly reaches up to you, you let yourself fall backwards onto the sheets, your arms stretched above your head. He slowly crawls on top of you, admiring your beauty, wondering how you’re able to still retain your innocence as you lay naked below him.

When you're finally face to face, you wrap one arm around his neck, careful not to hit his mechanical spine too hard. Your other hand starts caressing his metal sternum, as you take in every detail of his body. Your hand slides towards his face, where you touch the metal headpiece around the back of his head.

“Is this.. Is this detachable?” you ask softly, cautiously, as you don't want Echo thinking you like him any less with him wearing it. He smiles, and takes it off. It reveals his ears, and you can't help smiling in the most affectionate way; he has the cutest ears.

This time, it's Echo who's blushing. You let your fingertips wander the rim of his ear, and you find out he's a tad ticklish around there. He twitches his brows as he tries to regain himself. You chuckle, before you let your hand slide behind the back of his head and pull him close.

Your lips touch again, and you start kissing tenderly. The tips of your tongues touch, as they shyly meet halfway. Echo groans as you softly start biting his lower lip. You cannot help it, but the sound arouses you. You gasp and slowly part your legs, and finally wrap them around his pelvis.

He gladly accepts the invitation, looking at your face when he slowly enters you at last. Your eyes are closed, your head slightly tilted backwards. You bite your lower lip, your eyebrows wrinkled as it hurts, but he continues as gently as possible. Once he's fully inside, you let out a sigh as the tension from your face disappears.

The hurt turns into pleasure as he slowly moves his pelvis against yours. He is still looking at your face, making sure you're alright, that he's not hurting you anymore. When he finds a pleasing rhythm, you let out a moan, which would have startled yourself if you hadn't been this caught up in the moment. A shiver runs down Echo's body, which you feel inside.

You open your eyes with a gasp, and you look up at his face. His golden-brown eyes are admiring you, and his lips are curled into a smile. You feel the blush reappear on your cheeks, but you don't worry about it too much; Echo is used to it by now.

Without thinking too much about it, you sit upright as much as your intertwined bodies allow. A bit awkwardly, you try to swap positions. Echo helps you out once he realises what your intentions are. He is slightly surprised, since this is clearly your first time, but you want to take the lead now. But he isn't complaining.

Echo lays down on his back as you position yourself on top of him. You taste his lips again, before straightening your back. You guide him back inside you and start moving your pelvis up and down, starting slow but increasing the pace as you gain a bit of confidence in what you're doing. You close your eyes as you focus on the moment.

Echo looks up at you in both admiration and adoration. He positions his hand and scomp on either side of your moving hips. He is careful with the metal part of his right arm, because he doesn't want to distract you. Slowly, his hand and scomp slide upwards, reaching higher, until they reach your breasts.

He keeps his hand and scomp at the sides of your breasts, caressing your warm skin with his thumb. He doesn't feel the need to go further, as he doesn't want to objectify you, he doesn't want to take your innocence away. But he is touching sensitive skin and you let out another moan, your eyebrows wrinkling again, this time out of pleasure.

He's never seen your face this expressive before, and it feeds his excitement. He wants to get closer to you, and in a sudden, abrupt movement, he sits up straight, supporting his body with his socket-arm. You open your eyes in surprise and find his face just centimetres from yours. Your noses brush, your lips almost touching.

You continue your movements, and you notice the angle you find yourselves in is even more pleasing than before. Echo wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you close, your breasts against his chest. You put your hands on his back as you continue, your fingers sinking into his pale skin.

Your gazes keep locked as you quicken your pace, feeling your pleasure is reaching its climax. And Echo's too; he groans through clenched teeth, tightening his grip around your waist. You feel the muscles in his lower abdomen tighten. You moan from the tingling sensation you experience down below, and as you softly whisper his name in ecstasy, he releases all his tensions.

Still holding you, Echo falls backwards on your bed, taking you with him. When he lands on his back, you roll off him, to his right side. Your chests are heaving and you both are panting from your fusion, your intimacy. Your heads turn towards each other, and you both smile when your gazes meet again.

You start caressing his metal arm beside you. You would have liked to hold his hand, but it doesn't matter; this is Echo, and you love all of him.

…

PART IV | NIGHT

c. 19/18 BBY, Ord Mantell | Ord Mantell City

The evening has elapsed into the night, but your sense of time is gone. After your intimate get-together, Echo is still laying on his back on your bed, and you wish he could stay forever. You are curled around him, your leg arched around his pelvis, your head on his shoulder, your arm on his chest as you softly caress his skin and his cyborg parts you encounter on the way.

Eyes closed, he has his cheek pressed against the top of your head, his socket-arm wrapped around your upper body as he only focuses on your gentle touching and gentle breathing. He groans softly in content as you trace your fingertips over his skin.

“Why, er- why are you guys on the run?” you ask suddenly, in a soft and cautious way. The question has been on your mind for what seems like forever, and now that you've been this intimate with Echo, you finally have the courage to ask him.

He swallows as he slightly turns his head away from yours, his eyes opening and his gaze on the ceiling. “I really don't want to drag you into it,” he finally answers with a sigh. You heave yourself up slightly, your body still against his, but being able to look at his face.

“Echo, I'm worrying about you anyway. So I think it's only fair to me to know what I'm worrying about,” you shoot at him, and you're surprised by your own boldness. Echo looks at you, a smile appearing on his face as he thinks the same. “You're right, cyar’ika*.”

*cyar’ika = darling/sweetheart

“We're on the run from the Empire. We were soldiers of the Republic, but when the Imperials took control, well.. Let's just say we didn't part on good terms,” he finally tells you, a wry smile on his face. You're silent for a moment. As the war and the political takeover have had no impact on your personal life, you try to imagine how it must be for Echo, for his squad.

“What was the war like?” you ask in a whisper, so soft he almost missed it. Your head is still turned towards his face, but your gaze slides away. He looks back at you, and with his hand, he cups your chin, caressing your skin with his thumb.

“It was- it was both dreadful and.. And familiar, I guess,” he starts slowly, searching for the right explanation, being mindful to spare you from any details about the suffering and the losses. He wets his lips before continuing.

“We clones were created as soldiers for war, so there wasn't anything else for us. We were all brothers, fighting side by side, under the command of the Jedi. There was.. A lot of death and devastation, but we knew what our purpose was. We had each other.”

He pauses for a moment, his eyes blank as his gaze is unfocused. You want to comfort him, as it's clear to you he hasn't processed all the events during and after the war very well. But you lay still, as you feel there's more for him to tell. You don't want to interrupt him, distract him from finally speaking out his feelings, pouring his heart out.

His gaze returns to yours, as his hand shifts away from under your chin, and he wipes a lock of your hair behind your ear. He smiles for a very brief moment before continuing. “When the war ended, we lost our purpose, I guess. The war was awful, but at least we knew who we were, what we had to do. But when it ended and the Empire emerged, none of us really knew what was happening.”

You notice he's lost in thoughts again. He is thinking about Crosshair, now doing the bidding of the Empire. How they had to leave him, their brother, behind back on Kamino. How the squad had saved himself prior to those events, from the torture of his mind back at Skako Minor. How the Skakoans had experimented on him after the explosion at the Citadel. How he hadn't been around when Fives had needed him the most, how he had held 99 in his arms after his death. How he hadn't been able to save Hevy, Cutup and Droidbait, which seems an eternity ago now.

When you see tears forming in his eyes, you finally decide it's the right time to comfort him. You lean towards him, put your right hand on his jaw, and place the most tender, loving kiss on his forehead. You feel his grip around you tighten as he pulls you close. You wrap your arms around his neck and start cradling him, as silent tears run down his cheeks.

---

The night progresses with a lot more talking and comforting. Tonight, you have learned more about Echo and his squad than all the previous times you two met up combined. As Echo continues his experiences and confessions, you notice he's opening up to you, finally sharing details.

Although his stories are devastating and you had never imagined all this could happen to one person in only a couple of years, you love listening to his voice, as your naked bodies lay pressed against each other in a loving embrace. Your head is positioned on his chest, as it slowly rises and falls with every breath he takes.

You wish he could stay forever, just the two of you in your humble abode, but you know he can't leave his squad behind. The Empire will keep looking for them, for Omega. And you know what that means; they can't stay on Ord Mantell forever. You knew this beforehand, before you got yourselves close with one another, but the thought is still devastating to you.

But after all of Echo's stories and explanations, you understand. You finally have a better view of the galaxy beyond Ord Mantell, the advantages and the flaws of the Clone Wars, and how the Empire currently reigns with terror and oppression. Something is rotting in this galaxy, but there are still people out there trying to fight it, to fight for the good, for the well-being of the galaxy's citizens.

---

When the morning breaks, you know by the gut-wrenching feeling inside you it's time for Echo to go. He has to meet up with his squad to discuss their next step, to prepare their next mission, and you know he can't let them down. He won't let them down.

You slide into something comfortable and watch him get back into his blacks and armour. The easiness of his movements tells you he's done it a hundred times. A smile appears on your face, but there is sadness in it as well; you hate to see him leave.

At your front door, you both take the time to prolong the moment, to delay his inevitable departure. Your lips melt together in a passionate kiss one last time. You hug each other tightly, before moving apart reluctantly. You look each other in the eyes, taking everything in one last time, to never forget the moments you shared together.

“Thank you, cyar’ika*,” Echo whispers, before he presses his forehead to yours. You swallow, and after you both pull away, you finally ask: “What does that mean?” An affectionate smile appears on his face, his eyes somewhat sad but incredibly thankful for what you've given him. “That you mean the galaxy to me.”

*cyar’ika = darling/sweetheart

…

Epilogue

You don't know if you will see him again after this, but he has given you something. He ignited a spark inside you, as you now are fully aware there is more in this galaxy, more than just Ord Mantell City. He has given you the courage to free yourself from this place, even if that means diving into the unknown. But you are ready now.

Echo taglist: @covert1ntrovert

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wanderlust-in-my-soul · 11 months ago

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Currently Watching - April

aka The Masterlist

Because I love a good little list - in alphabetical order! 😊

Regularly updated during the month, latest update 30.04.2024

A little link to my favorite bl-tropes-collection 💙

I am happy about gif-requests 🌼

Here you can find all of my gifs.

Tracking: #josistag

At the end you can have a look at what we can expect in April with a MDL link and a link for a trailer (if avaible).

This is guaranteed to contain spoilers!

1. 25 Ju, Akasaka de 🇯🇵 (2/10)

They were fellow students and now they have to play in a BL together. One of them is two years older and popular. For the other one, this is his first big role and he needs it, so he is determined to to anything he needs to do, to be a good actor. Even when this means to find a partner and fall in love to be able to play the role perfectly. Why not try to be lovers with your co-star. All for the sake of the series of course.

2. Blue Boys 🇰🇷 (2/4)

This short series is quite good. I saw the first episode by chance and I was hooked, but lost it again, because I couldn't track it on MDL. Now it is up there. I hope these two can resolve their missunderstanding, with talking! But they are too hungry for each other...

3. Boys Be Brave! 🇰🇷 (2/8)

Enemies to lovers, but different. Jinwoo likes Kisub and Kisub knows this. But while Kisub gives his heart away to every person who hits on him and can't really say No to anyone, Jinwoo loves to build up his wall and hide behind a strong No. Their worlds collide, when Kisub moves in with Jinwoo, if he likes it or not. Great first episodes!

4. Cityboy_Log 🇰🇷 (12/?)

They are back and unhinged like before! Jihan and Jaejun met after a while because they were busy and it seems they had some catching up to do the night before. We get some daily vlogging, some cuteness and some jealousy, which wasn't that cute. But they are finally back and I am happy. The acting is still very good. There is no deeper story behind, just some idols, models and actors falling in love with each other and theit daily lifes.

5. Deep Night 🇹🇭 (3/8)

his is everything I was expecting, so it didn't disappoint, I guess. To be honest, I watch this for First. I guess he would have chemistry with a stick, soooo this is nice. And I hope the story, at least stays like this and won't get worse... Update: This show is a mess 😂 there is so much going on all at once and at the same time nothing really happens? It is so confusing, yet very entertaining. But Wela, my dear, it is totally okay to be pissed if one fucks with you, while you are so drunk you can't remember shit the next day... Just a thought.

6. Kare no Iru Seikatsu 🇯🇵 (3/8)

Kazuhito has no girlfriend and the ones he had, broke up with him, because they felt he likes someone else... Who might that be?... The story is simple, I guess? (But perhaps not that simple... The preview for ep 3 looks interesting.) Childhood friends are forced to move in together after spending time apart. One is a little bit naive and is trying to find out why girls breaking up with the most charming and handsome guy he knows and the latter is in love with the naive one and in the end they have their happy ending. I like it. I want to see their growth.

7. Love Is Like A Cat 🇰🇷 (10/12)

Who thought this was a good idea? Who wrote this? Who said cut at the end of scenes? Who thought this is be the way Mew should act? I cringe so hard and not in a funny way. This series is just bad. I keep watching because of this little bean. But I had to skip so many scenes in today's episodes, because it was just so bad! And I can't figure out if Mew just didn't want to be there and act or if that is the way the director wanted him to act... But the acting is bad. Bad choices everywhere. And the dialogues? Cringe... Why would a bean like Dae Byeol fall for Uno? Nope...

8. My Stand-In 🇹🇭 (1/12)

Okay, hear me out. I watch this for Poom and for Poom only. But the story lookes interesting, it was quite intriguing. I don't know why, but I cringed a bit too much at some scenes. But Poom is beautiful and that is all I care about. Yes, I can be this shallow!

9. Only Boo 🇹🇭 (4/12)

The cringe was so strong with this one this week! I had to pause multiple times, but at the same time I enjoyed it so much! Moo is so unhinged and I love him! But please! Don't let Moo's cousin become a possible love interest for Kang. I know we got this dream sequence this week, but there is something in the air between Shone and him... and I don't like it. The second couple... I felt really sad for them this week. Beeing in love with your best friend is never easy...

10. Unknown 🇹🇼 (12/12)

The story about found family, childhood trauma and struggling topped with a lovestory between "brothers". They aren't really brothers so I really don't care and just enjoy this forbidden and hurtful lovestory to the fullest. This is exactly what I hoped for! The longing, tension and hurting is so good! It is the aftermath of the shooting and Qian is still dealing with his emotions and his feelings for Yuan. The love between them is real and strong, but Qian is afraid and can't just let his heart decide over the head, yet. He loves Yuan, but is afraid what that means for them and especially for Yuan's future. And yet he held him back. He was the one reaching out in the end! I have said enough about them and this first part of ep 11 in my post. I love them. My heart belongs to them. I wish we had more developement between these two as a couple, but I still love them and I forgive this show the rush in the end, because I love it so much.

11. Word of Honor 🇨🇳 (20/36)

Those two flirt a lot and are a married couple. Everyone knows that. And I love and enjoy that! Overall this is such a fun watch and the different sects and intrigues are sometimes a little bit confusing, but interesting. I love this world of martial arts and I love how protective Wen Kexing is over Zhou Zishu.

Finished in April

Series

My Strawberry Film 🇯🇵

This is what I call a love triangle. And the fact that the screenwriters worked for Eien No Kinou or Jack o'Frost promised some heartbreak and teenage angst. And they delivered. I really like this series. And I felt so many emotions, especially for Ryo. And I really loved the ending. No fake relationship and no unrealistic confessions, just some teenagers in love and being friends. And I think Hiraku was such a sweet friend in this last episode. He apologized and he finally recognized Ryo's feelings for him. And I believe they stay friends in the future. It might be difficult, but a good friendship is worth fighting for. It has so much to do with respect and love for each other. It is a solid 8 out of 10 for me.

Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto 🇯🇵

The story about highschool sweethearts, who didn't have the chance to enjoy their young love, because of horrible family backgrounds. Their story is devastating and I am happy they found their way back to each other. The story was good, the acting was good, I am in love with Furuya Robin, which is nice, and the side characters were special (shoutout to Yuto!). I wish there was more "passion" from Miyata, but I guess it is due to his character. Overall it was a good watch and I enjoyed it! A good 8 out of 10 for me.

Jazz For Two 🇰🇷

I love bls about music and about traumatic pasts. The second couple has my heart. I just love them coming together. Usually I hate this bully-trope, but with them, I kinda enjoyed it. Perhaps because Jooha always looked like a hurting puppy. Overall the homophobia in this one is strong and I think it is interesting to see them deal with their own feelings. Internal and external homophobia is such a big thing in all their stories and I wish they had more time to show the developement from hating themselves to loving the other person and themselves. But in my opinion they made a good story and a good show. I like it very much. And what was that kiss in the end? Wow! A good 9 out of 10 for.

To Be Continued 🇹🇭

I really like this one! I read some comments that the reason they never got together was just stupid, but from their perspective I can understand why they reacted how they reacted. They were young and unsure what to do and what all of this meant for them and their friendship. What I liked about the show was the present and past scenes. We learned so much about their past and the scenes fitted perfectly. It was a really good series and I am glad I waited to binge it. Guess I come back to this one from time to time. Rewatch value is there. And those two have really good chemistry! A good 9 out of 10 for me.

Movie

Short Film

Dropped in April

We are 🇹🇭

I dropped this after the first half of the first episode. There are a few reasons for that. First, I need some shows to binge on lonely sundays. And second, I just don't feel like watching this one. It was so quirky for me. Not my kinf od humor right now.

Looking forward to in April

Love is like a cat - Trailer (Apr 1st)

We are - Trailer (Apr 3rd)

Memory in a letter - Trailer (Apr 6th)

Grey Shelter (Apr 11th)

Kare no Iru Seikatsu - Trailer (Apr 12th)

The Spirealm (Apr 15th)

Boys be brave! (Apr 25th)

25 Ji, Akasaka de (Apr 19th)

Kimi to Yukite Saku: Shinsengumi Seishunroku (Apr 25th)

My Stand-In - Trailer (Apr 26th)

Zettai BL ni Naru Sekai VS Zettai BL ni Naritakunai Otoko 2024

Knock Knock, Boys - Trailer

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frodo-with-glasses · 5 months ago

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Where have you been?

Uhhh, France?

(That’s a Hamilton reference, btw. I have never been to France.)

So! Another Hobbit Day is upon us. On this day last year, I’d promised you all that we would take another trek through LotR, with all new drawings and poems and fanfics. I fully expected to be finished with Book One by now, at least halfway through FotR. What actually happened is that the blog struggled through the first five and a half chapters of the book before suddenly going radio silent.

So what happened?

Well, as you might expect, real life happened. I won't go into the details here—since it has nothing to do with LotR—but I can explain in DMs if anyone is interested.

Basically, a change in my family led to a reexamination of what I thought I knew about my family, which led to a reexamination of what I thought I knew about myself, which kicked off an intense period of self-improvement.

Over the course of this past year, I began to unpack my family's abuse; I learned about boundaries; I started to unlearn my old people-pleasing tendencies; I reconnected relationships that were broken, reevaluated ones that were in the wrong place, and cut off ones that weren't good for me. I discovered there was a little kid in my head who's been waiting years and years for an adult to love her, and to take her needs seriously, and I finally have the chance to be that adult. And I'm happy to say that I've come to a place where I feel safer in my own head than I have ever been.

Probably very little of that is going to show through on this blog. It's all inward stuff; foundational stuff. But one thing that might affect you guys is that I left my (dreadfully overstimulating and stressful) part-time job, and I'm now working full time somewhere else. As much as I love what I do for a living now, working 40 hours a week does mean that I am become Boring Adult who does not have as much time for interneting. With my current schedule, there is no way I'd be able to sustain the intense schedule of "must post one drawing a day" that I had in the early days of this blog; and I don't expect myself to.

But! I would like to—slowly—get this train rolling again.

I find it hilariously apropos that the last piece of art I posted on this blog was of Frodo suddenly disappearing. From Merry's perspective, he completely vanished without explanation or warning. From your perspective, so did I.

But I find myself here again, on another September 22nd, and once again I'm beginning to feel that pull; that pull to read, and draw, and create, and share, and laugh with all of you. Life has calmed down enough for me that I once again have the mental space to think about pursuing my hobbies. There are so many things I want to do—so much to do with the time that is given to me. And I want this blog to be on that list.

My current goal is to post some new book art every other day. If that's too much, I'll adjust it. But if I find my groove and really get into it, who knows? We might return to your regularly scheduled Daily Dose of Frodo-With-Glasses. We shall have to see.

Anyway. If you've read this far, thank you! If you've stuck with this blog since the early days, thank you. And if you are one of that lovely core Fellowship that has had my back and prayed for me all along, I cannot thank you enough.

This past year has been an absolute ride. Not as difficult as a trek to Mordor, maybe, but not easy either. But no matter where I walked, I knew I didn't have to take the journey alone.

Anyway! Enough sappiness. Happy Hobbit Day! I'm excited to see what the next year has in store for us. 💚

#lady glasses speaks #long post #my writing #featuring:#frodo baggins #lord of the rings #lotr #my art #fig tree au

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yetanotherhiddlestoner · 6 months ago

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(MDNI 18+, smut will be eventually happening in this story line but still please respect the MDNI)

(Plus size reader x Negan. In the world of the dead rising, you just happen to fall for the one fucked up person who has no interest in you. And I am aware the timeline doesn't add up but for the story I had to make the timeline longer than a couple months.)

*Trigger Warning - There will be a few hurtful words. Negan is going to be an asshole for the first part of this so if you want the fluff and smut just skip past this chapter. Fatphobia. Eating Disorders. Fat shaming.*

CHAPTER ONE - I FELL HARD, YOU'LL FALL HARDER.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You remember the day that you were found and bought to the Sanctuary by Negan himself. You had been abandoned by your own people and left to die in the woods, Negan and his crew were on their way back home when he spotted you sitting at the base of the tree.

"Well Shit looky here" he said, and you looked up at him as he flung the bat over his shoulder. "You lost little lamb?", you were too scared to reply so you just nodded. "You alone?" again you nodded. "Do you speak?". You took a deep breathe and shallowed the ball of fear that had made it way to your throat "Yes, ummm" you didn't know this man, but holy hell was he hot. "I'm Negan, you may have heard of me?" He questions again. "No sorry I haven't." You tell him truthfully. "Well fuck me girly you have no fucking idea who I am" He looks shock as he lowers himself to your level, your eyes lock on to his. "Where did you come from; I own all the survivors in this area?" "My group never settled down, we were constantly wandering in search of supplies and would bunk down wherever we felt safe." Negan nodded understanding now how she wouldn't have known him if they were always on the move. "So where is your group now?" "They left me here, so I don't know."

"Excuse my fucking language but they fucking left one of their own out in this shithole world, what are you gonna do be walker bait? you don't seem to have any weapons on you, you're as helpless as a baby." You shrug, "I really don't know what I am going to do." He gets up quickly, but not before grabbing your hand and making you stand up to. "You are going to come to the Sanctuary with me. It is safe there, plenty of supplies and you can work for you food and other things," "Ok" is all you said as you follow Negan back. The first night there they didn't have a spare room for you so Negan let you crash in his room while he went and have fun with his wives. You had wanted to object to staying in his room, no doubt you could bunk on the floor anywhere else but he insisted that you had a goodnight sleep and that was that. For the first time in years, you slept peacefully.

You had lived with Negan as your leader for a few months now. You were thankful for the first time in your life to be a fat person, it meant Negan didn't want you as his wife, you could fly under the radar when it came to that way of living. You had been told many times by the other women there how they all had been asked to be his, but they had decided not to, they were allowed to live and work here.

He had a type as you could tell by the wives that he paraded around the compound daily and the ones he checked out when new people were bought in. His type was the tall skinny type, the ones that would go out nightly and party, who now obeyed him and gave themselves over to him whenever he wanted.

Yes, he was nicer to you than he was to most, he spoke to you with a kind voice, but he never asked you to be his, he never asked you to go hunt the dead down or even fight the ones who threaten to take over. Whenever you had interactions, he would never yell, and would often be smiling at you, of you took it as he was being a friendly leader. He disliked it when his men would interrupt your conversations. You did see his dark side, you saw what he did to people, the punishments, the torture.

After a while you started developing feelings, you tried to deny them, try to tell yourself it was pointless but it never worked, the more he spoke and showed you affection the more harder you fell and it made your heart break every time he had his body wrapped with his wives, it hurt to hear him talk about how they pleased him, how hard he was for them almost every day.

That changes in a blink of an eye.

"Hey Y/N Negan wants you in his office now" Simon says, leading the way to him.

You panic, have you done something wrong, have you not been pulling your weight? Had you missed an order he had given you?

"Come in" Negan says as soon as Simon knocks. "Sit" He orders you and Simon leaves you two alone. The room ran cold suddenly, this was not the Negan you knew. "It has been bought towards me by some of my men that maybe you should have less portions than the others considering how fat you are" Negan smirks, a laugh in voice. The words cut you like a knife. You look away from the man in front of you. "It really wouldn't hurt to lose a few now, would it?"

All you can do is nod. "Answer me dammit" he screams his hands hitting the desk. "Yes Negan" you muster up in a quiet voice. "I agree"

"Well alrighty then you can go finish your job then." he says dismissing you. You walk quickly to the bathroom, rushing past people trying to hide the tears.

"You, ok?" A female's voice says from one of the stalls.

You know her, she is one of his wives. "Yeah, I'm fine"

She puffs on a cigarette, "Let me guess you're Y/N?"

"How....did you know that?" You ask wiping your face.

"He talks openly around us, without realizing we hear and remember all, and from the tears he said some hurtful things, right? He has been boasting that shit all week. I am so sorry he said those things."

You shake your head, afraid of saying anything in case she would report it back to Negan.

"It is the truth, I am fat, I could use less food. I am not going to deny it. Less portions for me means more for others."

You leave the bathroom, feeling more shit about yourself than before.

It took about 2 months of planning before you had snuck enough weapons and food to make your get away. Sherry had helped you plan and save up for you to escape when nightfall came, she wanted to give you a chance, something that she didn't have at this point in time.

"Promise me you will never come back here" She asked as she opened the gate for you quietly.

"I promise but you deserve this so much more than I do" You whisper back to her, tears forming in both.

"I know Y/N but if I can help you and the others than maybe one day, I can be free to" she says wiping your tears away.

"You shouldn't have fallen for such a cruel man; I hope you find your happiness out there one day." Sherry gently places her hand on you cheek and smiles then closes the gate, leaving you in the woods once again. You run to the car that she had bargained just for you about 15 minutes away.

Once you started driving away you fought back the urge to cry. You were alone again, traveling to God knows where.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

12 Months later ~ Alexandria.

You had been at Alexandria for about 6 months when those trucks came rolling into your home. You had heard the stories about what he had done with Ricks gang and Rick knew that you had been one of his people before you escaped, only he knew the truth, he kept your secrets.

He made sure that each time Negan came to collect you were out scavenging. He wanted to protect you from him, with fears that maybe he would force you to return or hold some grudge over you leaving.

But on this day Negan had decided to come two days early and you looked at Rick for answers, you couldn't run and there was no point hiding as they searched the houses. Today you would be out there, you had just hoped that he didn't recognize you.

"Go over to the garden. Keep yourself blended with them; keep you hat down. He shouldn't bother you." Rick says pushing you to go.

You run over and quickly make yourself look busy, you picked up the small rack and you grabbed a spare hat and put it on, hiding your face.

You heard the tires, the brakes of the trucks squeal and a very familiar voice.

"Well Ricky boy look at you, your so close to pissing yourself aren't you."

You couldn't hear his reply. His men started to grab the goods that you spent time getting for him, a couple of them walked past you are smiling and wolf whistling at you and the others. You could hear him and Rick walking to the pantry, Olivia greeted them.

Negan laughed when Olivia was explaining that they were running out of food and staving.

"You got a fat chick guarding the food, are you sure as hell she not sneaking it at midnight.?" Rick stayed silent and Olivia started crying, you couldn't bear it.

You storm over to Olivia and Negan and slap him hard across the face. You turn to hug Olivia tightly.

"Fuck me, who the fuck do you think you are?" He says rubbing his cheek. You look at Rick from under your hat, "I'm Sorry" you whisper to him as he stares in shock.

"I asked you a question, you are to fucking answer it" he says grabbing you from Olivia pushing you to the floor, aiming Lucille at your face.

The hat still hiding your face, "You come here and take our stuff, that we worked hard on, that I don't care about but to talk shit about someone's weight is the fucking worse thing. You have no right to judge us on appearance." You say getting up, ignoring the protests from your friends and the fact that Lucille was still aimed.

"You must have some lady balls to speak to me like that. Who are you?" He uses Lucille to push the hat off and stops smirking. For the first time in 12 months, he locks eyes with you. Negan cannot believe what he is seeing.

"Y/N." he whispers. He notices that you have changed so much, you look good, not that you didn't look good before he thinks to himself.

"Are we done here?" Rick asks, everyone not sure what is about to happen.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Leave us, I think I need a word with Y/N alone." Negan places Lucille on his shoulders and one by one they leave. The group questioning Rick about you.

"Have you been here the entire fucking time?" Negan was mad.

"What does it matter?" You respond, eyeing him off.

"You fucking left in the middle of the night. Why?" He growls.

"Not like you cared but so what. One less fat mouth to feed would be a good thing, right?" He can hear the venom in your voice.

Now Negan understands, "So that is why? You were hurt by what I said."

"I am not the only one who wanted to escape you that night." Negan raises and eyebrow., you ignore his question.

"Let me guess, Sherry helped you. I had a feeling when she acted all weird the next day, avoiding me and shit." Negan slams Lucille down onto a coffee table, smashing it.

You don't flinch, you just look at the table, all broken. Wondering if you could repair it.

"AFTER EVERYTHING I DID FOR YOU. " Negan screams. You just breathe deeply.

"I was always thankful for what you did for me, saving me, giving me a bed and a room and a job." you say ignoring the tantrum that he was having.

"THEN WHY LEAVE OVER A STUPID COMMENT?"

"WHY?" You scream back before taking a deep breath "I was already eating less portions, if you or your men even cared to have noticed I only went to 2 dinners a week, I skipped most breakfast and lunches. I was already feeling bad for being fat, the looks I got for having the EXACT amount of food then everyone else confirmed what everyone was thinking and then you go and listen to your men and ask me to cut down more without even consulting me."

You tell him the truth; you were starving yourself anyway.

"You acted like an asshole; you could have maybe noticed that I was trying to change but you didn't." You spit back at him.

"So, you come to ole Ricky boy here and he takes you under his wing?" Negan eyes blacken as his says Rick's name.

"They saved me from a horde, I was stupid enough to try something and got overrun and stuck for a couple days on the roof of a shop. Simple as that, Negan."

"YOU WOULDN'T HAVE GOT STUCK IF YOU HAD STAYED WITH ME" Negan shouts the anger is bad once again. "I never asked you to scavenge, I kept you inside for a reason. I didn't want you to get hurt. I was always nice to you; did you not notice that?"

"And that is why your men did what they did, you showed me kindness, you showed them weakness, so when they came to you, telling you lies, and shit and you felt scared and put on the Big Bad Wolf pants and did what you did." "I have nothing more to say to you Negan. So, get the shit Rick and the rest of us have collected for you and get out." You look at him straight in the eyes, he just stares at you sternly, pointing Lucille at you. "If you were anybody else, I would have killed you." With that he turns his heels and stomps out, you hear shouting and the sound of the trucks being loaded. Once the gate closes, you break down crying. You feel Rick hugging you as you cry.

The next time you run into Negan, he a prisoner in Alexandria.

#daddy negan #jdm #negan smith #negan x reader #negan smut #negan x y/n #the walking dead negan #negan fanfiction #negan smith x you #jeffery dean morgan #plus size reader x negan #negan x reader smut #twd smut #Negan x yn smut

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monsterswithimagines · 2 months ago

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The Wolf

Bigby Wolf x Red Riding Hood OC

Summary: Red Riding Hood does not want to be afraid of The Big Bad Wolf anymore. A/N: Help. I don't know why I wrote this. This is pure smut. Good luck.

Masterlist

The silence between them was a living, writhing thing as they rode the elevator up to Red’s floor. She still wasn’t sure exactly how she had come to invite the Big Bad Wolf back to her place. It was something about almost dying–and him saving her life.

Her heart was pounding in her chest. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been alone with the Sheriff. Maybe she never had been. At least, not in Fabletown.

In the Homelands, though…

That memory was one of her most frequent nightmares.

Grandmother, what big eyes you have…

She’d been so stupid and naïve. But then, maybe she still was.

Why else would she be bringing the Big Bad Wolf to her apartment?

They reached her floor, and she fumbled with her keys as they walked to her door. He was smoking one of those disgusting Huff & Puffs, and she wanted to tell him to put it out before they went inside, but it seemed unfair, given he’d just saved her.

So she didn’t ask, but she didn’t have to. He dropped the cigarette to the floor and stomped it out before they went inside.

Her place was small and cosy. She had a combined living room and kitchen, a tiny bathroom and a bedroom. The bathroom door was closed, the bedroom door open.

Bigby looked around in interest, and Red tried not to blush as she cleared her throat.

“I’ll just… get my first aid kit.”

“Don’t bother. It was just a scratch. I’m already healing.”

Red ignored this and went into her bathroom. She dug through the cabinet underneath her sink, then came out, finding Bigby sitting on the very edge of her couch.

His torn white shirt stuck to his chest in places, with blood seeping through. Red stood in front of him, swallowed thickly, and then said: “you should probably take that off.”

He stared up at her, his expression a little helpless.

“Here…” She sat down on the coffee table across from him, setting the first aid kit to the side. Her hands trembled as she reached for the first button of his shirt, and she began to undo those buttons clumsily.

He just kept looking at her.

When his shirt fell open, her eyes met his, and the intensity in them surprised her. She gasped without knowing exactly why.

“Are you alright?” Bigby asked.

“I’m… I’m fine, Sheriff.”

He huffed, as if he didn’t believe her.

“I… I am,” she insisted, and forced her eyes to trail to his chest.

The large gash that had been there had turned into a slight scratch, like a cat’s. Red sighed, leaning back a little. He’d been right. There was no use trying to treat a wound that was already mostly gone.

Why had he agreed to come with her, then? Back to her apartment?

She looked back up at him.

There was so much concern there, on his face, and it occurred to her suddenly that maybe Bigby had just wanted to be sure she’d get home safe.

The Big Bad Wolf, making sure Red Riding Hood gets home safe… It’s like the start of a poor joke.

“You’re afraid of me,” Bigby observed, his voice tense.

Of course she was. Of course she was. He’d killed her grandmother, eaten her. And then he’d tried to do the same to her.

Grandmother, what big teeth you have…

She’d trusted him. For months, she’d trusted him, and then…

His strong voice, saying "Red," broke through her thoughts. He’d spoken that way to her daily, once upon a time. It had always calmed the worst of her anxieties. “Don’t be afraid.”

“I can’t help it.”

He frowned, or at least looked even more broody than he usually did. Slowly, as if giving her a chance to object, he reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

“I won’t hurt you.”

She did believe him. He had been the Sheriff of Fabletown for two hundred years and had proven time and again that he cared about the job, especially lately.

But still. Those had been the eyes she’d looked into while waiting to die.

“I never should have,” he went on. “I was stupid.”

It didn’t exactly make her feel better.

Bigby sighed. “I should go.” He stood, and before she knew what was happening, he’d walked past her to the front door.

“Wait.”

Her heart was beating even harder than before. She was sure he could hear it. But she stood, faced him, walked to where he was hesitating near the door.

“Thank you,” she said. “For saving my life tonight.”

“Just doing my job.”

She kissed him.

It was their first kiss in over three hundred years–since before everything had gone down between them. Last time, they had been in the woods, and it had been a sunny day, like every day had seemed to be back then.

His return kiss matched hers in intensity, a practiced response. Then he placed his hands on her shoulders and pushed her gently away.

“You don’t have to do that,” he mumbled.

“I know. I don’t have to do anything,” Red said.

“You’re confused.”

She shook her head.

“You hate me.”

She shook her head again. There was not a bone in her body that could have ever hated him. Even when he’d killed her grandmother, when he’d tried to kill her… Not a bone in her body.

She feared him. But before that, she had loved him.

Shapeshifter. Monster.

Lover.

She kissed him again.

Something between them snapped.

He gripped her hips, pressing her back against the door as he kissed her back, nipping at her lower lip and pushing his tongue into her mouth.

She moaned into the kiss. Her hands roamed his shoulders, drifted down his arms, went to his hips, then pushed underneath his still open shirt to trail across his stomach. Her touch made him shiver.

She kissed him fervently, their tongues brushing and teeth clacking together. She wanted to shed her fear, to lose herself in him the way she once had. He pressed against her, trapping her between him and the door, and his mouth pulled away from hers, trailing instead along her cheek, down to her neck.

“Wolf…” she whispered. “Oh…”

It was his old name, his real name.

His mouth stayed on her neck, his hands gripping her hips again as he nipped and sucked at her skin. Then his teeth grazed over her ear.

“I want you,” he growled.

That noise went straight to her core. Her knees threatened to buckle.

With a graze of her nail against his nipple, she withdrew her hands, pushing his shirt from his shoulders.

He growled again, nipping at her pulse-point. She moaned, her hands on his arms as they moved against each other–grinding like a couple of helpless teenagers.Then, letting out a shuddering gasp, she took his face in her hands, pulling at him until he looked at her.

His eyes were yellow.

That should have petrified her. But instead of fear, she felt a burning arousal.

She drew his mouth to hers again, briefly, her hands exploring his skin. The scars there. Most of them were new, at least since last she’d been with him, though they looked old.

“Jesus… Red,” he said when they drew apart for air.

“We’re wearing far too many clothes,” she complained, ignoring how helpless his tone had become.

He let out a low hum as he pressed his lips to her earlobe, his teeth nipping at it again as he murmured against her ear.

“Patience…”

"Never been my strong suit."

He pressed her harder against the door, teeth clamping down on her neck. His hands went to her hips, holding her still as he moved against her.

She raked her nails down his chest and stomach.

The sound that came from his throat surprised her, and the way his grinding sped up did so even more.

“Yeah, just like that,” she told him.

Her skin was on fire, her lower stomach had become one giant ball of nerves. Every time he bit the place where her neck met her shoulder–never quite drawing blood–a shock went through her system.

She moaned and tilted her head back, exposing more of her neck to him.

His teeth, now sharp, raked against the skin there, and she trembled.

His tongue slid along the trail of blood he’d just left, soothing the burn of the scratch.

Suddenly, her loose V-neck sweater and jeans felt far too constricting. They were in the way.

She held on to Bigby’s shoulders desperately.

“C’mon… C’mon...”

“Hold on to me,” he told her, his voice rough.

She yelped as he picked her up, her legs wrapping around him of their own accord as he carried her to the couch. When they reached it, he gently laid her down, his body trapping hers against the cushions as his lips went back to her neck.

"Fuck..." she had always loved when The Wolf had manhandled her like that, throwing her around like a doll. Like she weighed nothing. Maybe she’d brought what had happened on herself. "Wolf… Bigby…”

He continued to trail a path of kisses and nips down her neck. His hands roamed her sides, then went to her jeans, unbuttoning them.

"Please..." she took a deep breath. "Fuck... I want you so badly..."

His hands had pulled down her tight jeans until they were around her ankles. She kicked them off, then wrapped her legs around his waist.

“Please what?” he asked, his teeth teasing the skin of her collarbone.

"Please take off your pants and fuck me."

Bigby pushed himself up, looking down at her. There was something helpless in his gaze, and Red found herself wondering if he’d spent all these centuries thinking about what had happened between them, too.

He took a deep breath, pulling his belt off and tossing it to the side.

“You’re not gonna back out of this now, are you?”

She laughed. Then she just stared at him, letting him see everything she felt.

She knew her cheeks were flushed, her hair a mess. The places where he’d bit and nipped at her bruised. But it was her eyes she wanted him to notice. The feelings within them.

“Fuck… You’re stubborn, you know that?” His hands went to his pants, and he unbuttoned them.

“How’s that?”

“I’ve done everything in my power to make you stop caring.”

She jolted.

He pushed his pants off, the article of clothing joining his shirt and belt on the floor. Then, he knelt down between her legs, his hands going to grab her hips.

"Here, let me..." She sat up, pulling off her sweater and throwing it randomly away. With it off, she was left only in her bra and panties, with him only in his boxers. At some point, though, she couldn’t remember when, they had both managed to kick off their shoes.

He looked at her with hunger in his eyes.

He laid her down again, his body trapping her between his arms and the couch, then slid down her body. He brought his head down, his mouth attaching to the skin by her navel, to which she moaned and arched into his touch.

"God... damnit, Bigby. Fuck..."

“I don’t remember you swearing this much.” He brought his mouth lower, to the edge of her panties, tongue teasing the sensitive skin just above the lacy material.

She moaned, her hands threading into his hair.

He chuckled darkly.

He brought his lips down, mouthing at her through the material of her underwear, still just teasing her. She gasped at the feeling, rolling her hips against his mouth. She wanted him, wanted him so badly, but he only continued his slow and deliberate movements, the material of her panties getting wet from his tongue.

"Bigby... if you keep that up... I'm gonna..."

“That’s the whole point, Red,” he murmured.

He worked his tongue slowly against her, and her moans became higher in pitch. With how thin the material of her panties was, he might as well have been mouthing at her bare pussy–and it felt like it.

Already, she was so close.

“You’re so goddamn perfect,” he murmured against her.

He brought his hands to her hips again, gripping them tightly, holding them in place so she could no longer move.

"Bigby.... Bigby!" Her hands gripped his hair tightly.

“Not yet, not yet…” he said, then pressed a kiss to her thigh before going back to work on her.

She panted hard, trying desperately not to tumble over the edge… But it was a losing game.

He continued his slow, deliberate movements, his tongue swirling against the material of her panties.

"Bigby, please, please, I'm gonna... I'm gonna-!"

He hummed and licked the material right over her clit. It was all the permission she needed.

She shuddered, gasped, and came entirely undone.

He let her come down from the high as gently as he could, mouthing her through it, then pulling back to simply stare up at her. He rubbed her thighs softly with his hands, and she looked down at him, wondering what he would do next.

“We can stop,” he told her.

“Don’t you dare.”

He pulled her panties off slowly, and she moaned as the cold air hit her sensitive pussy. Then, she watched him through lidded eyes as he pulled his own boxers off his hips, kicking them off the rest of the way.

Her nails dug into his shoulders as he slid into her.

He buried his face against her neck, his arms wrapping around her waist to keep her close to him, his mouth moving against her skin as his cock found home. He stilled, only briefly, then began to slowly thrust.

“Goddamit, Red…”

Every movement of his hips made her see stars. She could hear herself moaning, from very far away, and wasn’t sure if she was saying his name or just making noise.

She wrapped her legs around his waist again. The new angle brought him even deeper.

Neither of them was going to last very long like this, she was sure of it.

"Bigby, please... Harder,” she begged.

His movements became faster. She could tell he was losing himself in her completely, the way she was losing herself in him. Every move of his hips built the pleasure higher, made her moans louder.

Bigby snarled.

They came together, their ragged breaths and moans filling the air, her body trembling with the force of it.

He pressed his mouth to hers, not kissing her, just breathing her air as he rode them through it.

Everything went white.

She eventually came back to herself. His body had collapsed on top of hers, boneless. He nuzzled his head into the crook of her neck again, and her heart was still racing and her breathing was still ragged and she was sure he could feel it.

She laughed breathlessly, stroking her hands lightly over where her nails had at some point drawn blood from his shoulders.

“You… good?” he asked, drawing back to look down at her.

She nodded.

“I was too rough,” he insisted.

She was sure she looked like it, covered in marks and bruises and a little blood from when he’d used his teeth. But she didn’t care. She hadn’t felt this good in over three hundred years.

“I’ll just buy a turtleneck.”

“That’s not-”

“Bigby,” she told him, pushing herself up on her elbows so their faces were closer together. “Stop it.”

He looked down at her, then dropped his head.

She wouldn't make him say what she was sure he felt–wouldn't scare him by voicing it herself. Instead, she ran her fingers through his hair, letting him rest against her as she leaned back against the couch cushions.

They slept there, curled up on the couch, pressed together. Their legs tangled, his arm draped across her and his lips pressed to her pulse.

For the first time in a long time, Little Red Riding Hood did not have nightmares about the Big Bad Wolf.

#bigby wolf #fables: the wolf among us #the wolf among us #twau #telltale the wolf among us #bigby wolf x oc #fanfiction #tw: smut

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malenjoyer · 9 months ago

Note

Hi!

I know right now may not be the best time to say this, but I'm kind of still processing how fast this all happened. As someone who likes to look over artists' past work esp my fav works daily and just suddenly noticed that they're almost all gone: twitter, instagram, and tumblr. It frustrates me that not only has this situation affected you, but how it really takes one selfish and inconsiderate person to ruin everything for others. I truly hope that you can heal from this and maybe we might see those pictures again, but this is just soo much to process. Just love and support for you <33333 🥹🫶😭🫶🫶🫶🫶

Hi. I’ve privated a lot of my work on tumblr and Instagram, so they’re not gone forever. I still have a lot of positive memories with them so I didn’t want to delete them. I wanted to keep all the nice comments and support I’ve gotten over these past few years.. I might unarchive them sometime in the future when I’m more okay with it being looked at. Twitter, I had no choice but to delete it, especially ones with dick, jason, and Peter Parker. My brain freaked out a little bit from seeing evidence of the person saving my art and making fake clip files with them. Logically, I am aware deleting my old art in response is stupid.

But it wasn’t limited to just comic art, it was other interests I had too which was really uncomfortable that someone would go to the extent of pretending they like other stuff I liked. They would also paraphrase tweets I’ve made about my personal life onto their own twitter. That just isn’t okay.

Every interest I’ve ever fallen in love with meant a lot to me. This is probably not publicly known information since I’m relatively private, as a depressed autistic person, a lot of who I am is what I end up liking. My friends and relatives describe me as dressing up like a cartoon character, because everything I like is so visibly obvious. I become utterly consumed in my favorite things. Suddenly, it feels like all of my control was taken away from me. My interests collected over the years were no longer just mine, it was someone else’s because they decided to lie and it was easier to continue lying. I don’t know how much was saved. There was a screenshot of a message with over 8+ of my art works sent excluding the fake files.

I don’t have control over it. The impersonation of my identity and my life experiences.

But I do have control over who gets to see what I put out in the future. I could probably write this better but I’ve rewritten a lot of things within these two days. Rewritten posts over and over so it sounds less aggressive, less hurt, less like I am trying to call for a witch hunt and more just taking extra precautions. I don’t think I have the energy to rewrite this to seem less vulnerable/pathetic.

I want to apologize to everyone who hoped I’d keep my past art public. I know how it feels. I’ve been fans of artists who just blew up their account one day and never came back. I only privated them on tumblr and Instagram. That’s all I can do. Honestly, I’m hoping a part of my brain just forgets some of this happened since depression does come with memory loss.. This post is now too long.. but I hope it gives some insight for what’s happening on my side of the brain. I appreciate all the support so far.

If you see me acting a little weird on twitter, I’m just trying to regain a sense of control over my identity.

#long post #very long post

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woneuntonzz · 9 months ago

Text

greatest comedian ≈ s.es, o.str

popularguy!eunseok x afab!reader x bestfriend!shotaro

“god must be the greatest comedian I know.”

contains: angst, fluff, comfort, cursing, pining (ig), mentions of alcohol, slightly suggestive jokes, humor (lmao)

wordcount: 10.8k

a/n: i'm back :0 (kinda) i'm gonna try and get to my asks soon pls wait for me :<

songfic inspired by:

“You’re funny!”

He’s heard it countless times. And he truly was. Truly, he was a delight to be around. He reveled in the laughter and amusement of others. Your image of him was no different from everyone else’s. You’ve always thought he was funny. But somehow he’s never made you laugh. Well, all he’s ever done is bring your self-doubts to afloat, and served a great part in creating this big barricade in your academic life that you’ve been trying to get through for over a year now.

“You still like that guy? For real?” you breathe out a chuckle to your friend’s query, in harmony with the sounds of the keyboard’s clicks as you make yourself busy.

“Yes, Natty.” your voice was soft as you replied and as you did you felt Natty’s hand landing calmly on your shoulder.

“Ever thought of confessing?” —I have, I do all the time— you say to yourself. “I mean, who knows, he might like you too.”

You almost guffawed, but Natty would only lay her head on your shoulder and she’d snap her head up at you when you answered, “On another universe, maybe. I don’t exist in his little theater show.”

“What a way to refer to someone’s blooming social life.” you darted your eyes at Natty’s poking, turning the both of you into a bundle of laughter.

If only he could hear the melody that sounded from your lips. “Why’d you say it like I don’t have a social life?”

“Miss Y/n, I did not say that at all. You’re delusional!” your friend gave you a light push, your arms crossing on top of one another on your chest.

“I am not delusional!” you kept the kid in your tone whilst appearing offended.

In fact, you truly weren’t. While as a youngin you’d hope every coincidence bore meanings, you grew up to face reality, though not accepting it entirely. A part of you hoped there was a small spark that went off every time you met his gaze, that he was just as withdrawn with you as you were with him because he was shy, that he only pretended to not care about you because he liked you too. But a view of him from afar —how his life was a movie in itself— told you you’d be nothing more but a mere extra in the extravagance of his daily proceedings.

So when prom came around, while everyone else scurried around to find their dates, you just stood still —more accurately, sat and waited for anything interesting to happen in your life— and watched the pretty girls being picked out by men of all kinds like flowers on a nice green field. You just hated that by the end of prom night, this nice field of tamed green grass will turn into a rowdy, muddy mess stepped on by those men —if you could even call them that. The view wasn’t as sweet to you like how everyone else saw it, but perhaps it was because you were bitter.

“Aren’t you excited for prom night? I heard Jacob will DJ this year, I bet it’s gonna be awesome.” you shrugged at your friend, unsure if you were even gonna go to prom.

“I bet you’ll have loads of fun.” your friend was quick to pick up on your masked expression, much to your surprise.

“Hmm, is this about…” he looks you right in the eyes,“Bingo! code Eun—”

“Shh!” you bit your lip after shushing him, containing the laugh that threatened to escape from you. “Keep it down!”

“Oh, sorry.” a jesting evil chuckle was evoked from him making your face scrunch up. He laughs at you and motions like he’s about to pinch your face. “But, hear me out. Why don’t you ask him out?”

You sighed as an array of reasons popped up in your head. “Even if I had the courage to do that did you really think he’d say yes? To me?” your friend snorted at your tone, and again, looks you right in the eyes.

“Why not?” you raised your brows as a way of asking him if he was being serious, “Look, just being for real here, you’re pretty enough to overthrow those ‘popular girls’, your cute, your talented, your actually interesting —I mean what’s there not to like?”

You gave yourself a second to think and your eyes followed the lines separating each tile on the floor, and from the distance you saw him. You were in the cafeteria, and for some reason not with Natty. Some guy named Eric had asked her to meet him in some classroom, you’ve heard from some of his friends that he was asking Natty out to prom and planned a surprise. Meanwhile your dream date was sat five tables away from where you were. Laughter filled the table he and his friends occupied. He must be so funny then.

“Y/n?” Your friend’s voice was all it took for you to avert your eyes from Eunseok. “It’s kinda rude to just stare at your crush and daydream mid conversation, just so you know.”

You can’t help but laugh, at your friend’s jovial banter and at yourself for being so pathetic. “Sorry, Sho.”

“I was kidding, it’s totally fine Miss scared-of-confrontations.” you playfully rolled your eyes at him.

“I’m not scared of confrontations.” but his words took you a step back and you thought maybe you truly were scared of confrontations.

“Yeah? prove it! prove it! prove it!” and he kept repeating it like a kid and you had to shush him again. “Ask him out!”

“Shotaro, I've never wanted to punch someone this bad in my life before, just stop.” and he just laughs at you again. You look to your side, and coincidentally right into his eyes. It would’ve been the highlight for your day, the best day of your week —your life even— if not for the flowers he held in his hand. And no, they weren’t for you. You thought they could never be for you. He held them in his hands whilst he wore that grin that drew everybody in his presence. You looked away, not wanting to see the events waiting to unfold before you.

“Let’s go, Sho.” you took hold of Shotaro’s wrist, dragging him out of the cafeteria with you. Once you were out of the bustling atmosphere, you started sprinting, still not letting go of your friend.

“Where are we going?” and then suddenly you stopped.

You could see Natty holding hands with Eric from the other end of the hallway, and some of Eric’s friends tagging along from behind.

“Oh, so that’s where Natty’s been. No wonder.” you hear Shotaro utter quietly from behind you.

“Yeah. No wonder.” your lips spread to a small smile, seeing how happy Natty actually is. You just hope Eric isn’t just another guy.

“Hey, Y/n, why’d you pull me out of the cafeteria? I was trying to skin the fried tofu with my tee—”

“Sorry, I just didn’t want to see it —them, I mean.” your friend just stared at you, confused, and it showed on his face. A soft, but bitter laugh came out of your mouth. You figured Shotaro might’ve not seen what you saw, or maybe he didn’t care. “‘You-know-who’ was gonna ask some lucky girl to prom.”

“Really? Lucky?” he promptly shakes his head, and now you’re confused. “I don’t even know why I asked —anyways, I saw Mr.’Funny-Guy’ holding a bouquet. You know, for a second I thought you became Flash and just gave him those and asked him out to prom at ten times speed.” you laugh, and in all honesty just wanting to look past everything you saw, and everything that might’ve or did happen after the two of you ran off.

“Yeah. Very lucky.” Shotaro shook his head again, keeping his eyes on the smile that he could recognize from all the times you have found yourself on a disappointing stand.

“I’m sorry to say this, but, Eunseok isn’t all that. You can have fun without him. You have Natty —or maybe not her because she’s probably gonna spend time with that guy— me! you have me! and Minji, though I’ve heard someone had asked her out, that's probably why she’s not around right now…”

With pursed lips and crossed arms, you searched for the sense in his words, and when you had found it he was already looking back at you. Tilting your head to the side, you hum, a nod following shortly after. Shotaro was once again confused.

“Shotaro, how do you feel about going to prom with me?” you almost guffawed when he shrugged.

“Well, my plan was to just stick by you the whole night so we could have fun, so, technically…” he was suddenly stuck. “We’re best friends and all…”

“Yeah, but like, I’m actually asking you to be my date. Since we’re best friends and all.” you mimicked the tone that displaced his playful one when he spoke earlier. He scrunches his nose at you as some sort of counter-attack.

“Okay. That’s great.” he mirrors your pose and crosses his arms as well, and you both tilt your head at the same time —and it was soon followed by laughter.

Osaki Shotaro is probably the third funniest person I know, or, should he be second? —you jot down on your notes app. You now lay on your bed, just a few nights away from prom. Your notes app became a little get away for you as it was easier to type than to write things down. You swear that the world will burn once someone has seen the things you’ve very diligently typed in the app. It was your safe space, locked away from everyone. Even from Natty. Even from Shotaro. I wonder what I should wear. I wonder what he’s gonna wear, what his date would wear. She for sure said yes. Who wouldn’t? I would, a hundred percent. I’m gonna have to make sure we don’t wear the same dress, not even the same color. What’s a rare color? —your thoughts were a river with no end. It just flowed, especially when you lay alone in your room paying mind to nothing with being in such a secluded and quiet place. You were there, the cold air against your exposed skin, but you would feel nothing of it. You were deep within the depths of your perception. You itched to know. Who was the girl? —and if you were being honest, you missed any signs of him being infatuated with someone else. Who am I kidding? It couldn’t be me.

For the days that followed, you kept your mind on what to wear. Of course, not without crossing paths with Song Eunseok. He seemed his usual self —if not happier. You refuse to see it that way, to accept that whoever she might be, she’s making him twice the smiley guy he is. You’d reunite with Natty and Minji eventually. They asked if you were attending prom night because they’ve heard of the news. It had seemed as if everyone saw it coming. Maybe they are a match. Maybe they just look that good together. Maybe they’re made for each other.

“Maybe he just asked out a friend, you know, for a friendly date of sorts. Like you and Taro!” as sweet as Natty could be, you just truly wanted to avoid conversations regarding you-know-who. You’d just smile, not sparing her a look.

It was your way of telling people to stop talking about something that upset you, and Shotaro noticed right away even though you were late to catch up on your sides pressed against each other when he scoots closer. “Natty’s right.” he was regretful of that reply, so he’d quickly avert from the topic of you-know-who. “By the way Y/n, what are you gonna wear? the color and stuff, we can match.” your head snaps up, being reminded you should’ve been getting ideas for your outfit instead of being dazed over a boy that has never even bothered to acknowledge your presence.

“I don’t know yet. I don’t have ideas right now. Do you?” you finally look over to Shotaro, and for a second you’d jolt seeing the tip of your nose and his only a little over an inch from touching.

He backed away almost instantly with a swift reply of, “I don’t have any either. I mean, it’d be fine by me to take charge if we didn’t have to follow an attire.”

Smack. Timely, you both gasped hearing such a loud sound coming from one of your friend —Minji, who was looking a little more enthusiastic than usual. “I have an idea. Let’s all shop together. Natty and I can work on both of you.”

Natty’s beam infected you when you looked over at her because you knew they got your backs. And that was one thing off your checklist of worries. Only a few hundred more to tick.

“My mom said she wanted to help you get ready for prom night.” —and with a few flips of a textbook you were already off and walking back home with Shotaro, like usual.

“Really? I mean, I suppose it’d be easier if I was there, then you wouldn’t have to pick me up.” you reply with a slight pout, giving his offer —or rather his mother’s— serious consideration.

“I mean, it could be that or you join us for dinner tonight. I kind of figured Auntie would prefer it if she was the one who helped you, you’re her daughter after all, aren’t you?” your hand came to catch the laughter from your lips as he spoke. A laugh, and a sneeze, to which Shotaro responds with, “Ew.”

��Don’t ‘ew’ me!” his giggles slid through your ears, filling it up with his sweet melody. “Ew.” and of course you had to bite back.

“What? 'ew' what?” and he kept giggling.

You could only chuckle to yourself, biting down on your bottom lip. “Nothing” you breathe out.

It couldn’t be just nothing. Or at least he hoped. And so like every rational and mature man, he snatched the hairpin that held your poorly cut bangs from your face and ran. He was lucky it sled off easily. You chased him whilst calling out for his name, threatening him with actions you would never do. You could never. All while he giggled to himself like a little boy.

♪ ♪ ♪

[A week ago…]

Everyone tends to only consider what’s on the surface of the water, unknowing of the storm that lies underneath the seas.

“What about Shotaro?” “Forget him.”

No apparent aggression, but betrayal could be sensed with the constant fall of his intonation as he continued to speak, “He chose her over us.” and his breath falls along with his hands that got done with smoothing out the wrinkles on his uniform.

“I mean, you would too. Isn’t that why you two got into a fight?” he shrugged at his friend.

And then laughed.

“What’s so funny?” The friend had furrowed eyebrows as he inspected the demeanor of the man before him.

“He’s talking to her everyday now. Me on the other hand?” he looks to his left, the body-length mirror of his room. “I’m so close, yet so far. I don’t even think I amuse her.”

“Why not? you’re Song Eunseok, the funny —and insanely hot guy, come on now.”

“Yeah. That’s the problem. Funny, insanely… hot?”

The two laughed in chorus.

“What’s the point of being so admired by so many people if the one I’ve been admiring doesn’t even give a flying fuck?” Eunseok shook his head as he spoke, facing his mirror and checking his reflection. “If anything she probably hates —no, not hate, but she doesn’t like me. For sure.” he straightens the collar of his shirt.

“The popular guy stigma.” he laughs at his friend’s sigh, and he replies,

“It’s true for some people. I could see why she might think I’m like them.” he smiled but his movements would be a complete contrast to it as he kept fixing nothing and dusting off nothing on his uniform. “Say we weren’t friends, and you’re a transferee, how would you see me?” he turns around to face his friend who was flummoxed with his sudden question.

“Well, I’m an extrovert myself, so I’d probably ask you to hang out first and foremost. You’re fine as hell, you’re quite the character.” Eunseok’s eyes traveled to the ground after hearing his friend’s response. He couldn’t quite tell if it was genuine or was just a guise to amuse him. This friend was not like the ones he once had in his life. Not like Shotaro. Not like you.

“Character?” Eunseok chuckled to himself. “I wonder if this… character was why we grew apart.”

“You and Shotaro?”

“Yes, and no.” Eunseok’s heavy sigh almost startled the other boy. “I’m talking about the girl.” a silent ‘oh’ was exuded from the boy’s mouth as he watched the other who moved to take a seat next to him. “I don’t get how moving schools cut our ties. Shotaro and I were still friends after I moved. I mean, we were neighbors. But still. Did she really not care about me?”

“Probably. Girls do that, don’t they?” Eunseok laughed again, with knitted brows this time.

“No. We’ll never know.” he says, running his tongue over his top lip before he continued, “We’re a bunch of dicks. How would we know?”

And they guffawed.

“Just ask her out to prom. Before Shotaro does.” Eunseok nods at his friend. “I bet you fifty bucks you can get her to say yes empty handed.”

“Dude, it’s not in me to not give her anything.”

[Present Day]

If I can make you laugh, you’re going to prom with me.

It would’ve been raining diamonds if he was able to carry out his plan. He would make her laugh then she’s all his for prom night, and hopefully for the days that follow.

But now he stood —oddly quiet— with his friends in a corner shop near school buying whatever shit they had to buy. “Hey nice guy! What's up? Is your mouth glued shut? stapled?”

One of his friends had laid their arm over his shoulders, tightening his hold when Eunseok didn’t answer immediately. “I’m fine. I think the store ran out of condoms.” the other snorts at his answer, a poor attempt at a joke.

“Do virgins eat condoms?” a loud ‘tsk’ would follow after, “If you’re getting fucked it’s by something up there in your cranium. Tell me.”

Eunseok sighed as he mustered up the guts to tell. “I didn’t get the girl.”

Surprised, and quite perplexed, his friend removed his arm from him to look him in the eyes saying, “What do you mean? I thought Gaeul said yes?”

“It was never Gaeul.”

“Then who?”

“You.” Eunseok grabs his friend's face, pretending to pull him in for a kiss. His friend —like every straight man— would counteract his actions.

“Ew dude, I’m not fucking gay, for the last time!”

“It’s always been you.”

Eunseok would let go of his friend hearing another one of their friends approaching as she laughed. “Hi nice guy!”

“And hi to you too, Miss Korea.” the girl giggles at Eunseok’s reply.

“Is it true? You and Heeseung have been sleeping together?” Eunseok smirked, hearing the girl’s jesting.

“What?” Before Heeseung could speak again, Eunseok butts in with a quip.

“Oh, yes! But he hides it, he must be ashamed of me —ashamed of loving me!” dramatic, and exaggerated, still it was one for the titters.

“I hate you, Yuna. Have a nice fucking day.” and Heeseung walks out whilst the two continue laughing amongst themselves.

The cackles died down once the two were left alone as their friends continued to roam the shop.

“Hey, not to be nosy or anything, but did you seriously not mean to ask Gaeul? sorry I just heard —I promise I wasn’t actively listening in.” Yuna even waved her hands in front of her face to dismiss any misinterpretations.

And with a small smile, Eunseok breathes in to reply to her. “It’s okay. We weren’t exactly being discreet about it at all.” his eyes shifted along the shelves that sandwiched the two of them. “But yeah. I asked Gaeul because, I don’t know, why not?”

Yuna nods at a broken pace for a couple of seconds as she tries to understand, getting caught up in some holes as she went through what he told her one more time before asking, “So, then, who were you meant to ask?”

“Doesn’t matter. She’s got a date already anyways. I got a date, she got a date, you got a date, everyone gets a date. It’s gonna be fun.” he displays a wide smile, but it was almost robotic in a way that made Yuna huff trying to get over how ridiculous he looked at the moment. “Do you mind me asking about your date Miss Korea?”

“Well, I was hoping this guy would ask me. But I don’t think he had me in mind at all. But yeah, I’m going with Sungchan, you're going with Gaeul, we all have dates. Let’s be happy.” Eunseok chuckled at the way her voice imitated his in some way.

“Yeah. Let’s be happy.”

♪ ♪ ♪

It’s been an hour or two of Natty and Minji flitting around the boutique to find you and Shotaro some nice outfits for prom night. The theme? “Retro romance.”

“It’s fun but I feel like there could be better themes. There’d be dozens of polkadot skirts, I can already see it.” Natty mumbles in between picking out a few dresses for you to try on. She holds out a shirt dress, yellow with hints of white in a gingham pattern. “This is pretty retro, right? we could pair it with a belt and a skimmer hat with a purple ribbon.” Natty scans the piece of clothing, moving closer to you and holding it out next to your figure.

Your head snaps instantly when you hear an utterance next to you, “It looks cute.” Shotaro was a bit taken aback with how all three of you stopped just to look at him just because of his short little comment.

Minji approached, coming from a section of the boutique just a little farther from where the three of you were. She came walking with a few items at hand. It was a plain long sleeve shirt, white, a plaid suit vest —in the same color as the dress Natty held—, and some flared trousers in a darker shade of yellow, just a little muted.

“Oh my god, oh my god, you guys need to get into the fitting rooms right now!” you giggled at the way Natty gushed and rushed to get you and Shotaro on your feet.

Her giggles were all it took for you and Shotaro to speed to the fitting rooms. Once the dress went over your head and the skirt settled against your bare legs, your hands traced the shape of your waist seeing how perfectly the dress fits and hugs your body. You loved how the color complemented your skin. Like a perfect painting, freshly polished. You walked out of the fitting room, eyes glued to the flow of the skirt. Once your feet have crossed the line that separated the fitting room from the rest of the boutique, your eyes land on the floor. Your lone feet were now joined by another pair dressed in white Nike air force 1s.

Looking up to your right, smiling eyes greet your own. “Sho, you look dapper!” your exclaim lifted the corners of his mouth to their highest point.

“Wait till I get my hair done.” he says with his chest up and then playfully biting his lower lip.

You laugh at his face, slightly shoving him from where he stood with a light push. He —very gently— bumps his shoulder onto yours, causing you to tilt a tad. With a little chortle, you tell him, “You don’t really need to get it done. It looks good the way it is.” as you ruffle his hair.

He lets out a giggle, so soft and gleeful. “Whatever you say, pretty.”

Walking back to your friends, from a distance, their eyes welcomed the two of you. Their compliments almost fell from the end of their tongues. A gasp leaped over Natty’s words, her hand rushing to catch her breath. “You look cute together!” and you almost gagged from all the cooing. As opposed to you, Shotaro just smiled, his eyes were smiling too. Smiling at you. It wasn’t anything out of the ordinary —you’d convince yourself. But your cognition went offbeat when you met his eyes, and yours would hastily look around for something, anything to subside the feeling that was simmering from within you.

You were thankful that Minji made her comment before anyone noticed. “You look like twin bananas.” your face would scrunch up, and she’d slightly repel, speaking again, “I was trying to say the colors looked cute!” you hear Shotaro’s giggle again. Instinctively, you peered at him. Your best friend.

He used to be your best friend too.

“Y/n?”

You shook your head, your lips forming the best smile you could pull out of your blues. You raised your brows at your best friend who had called you out of your thoughts. “I like these outfits. Let’s get them, yeah?”

“Yeah. I like them too.” he nods along with his words. “Told you you’d look great in anything!” he gently nudges at you when he spews the acclaim.

Just days before he assured you that finding a decent outfit would be no problem, emphasizing that “you already look good with just our school uniform on.” —you’d dispense a hearty cackle, though, you knew he must’ve been sincere with it all, you only intended to humor the situation. All for the sake of not having to foster thoughts about everything he’s said to and done for you for the past two weeks after the ‘you-know-who incident’.

All the while ‘you-know-who’ feigned folly. It was the only way he could ever allow himself to overlook the facts that unfolded from across the street in front of him. The fact that her happiness radiated in high magnitudes. The fact that she laughed with someone else, wore stupid banana-colored matching outfits with someone else —that she laughed with that guy as if he was the greatest comedian she knew. It was the fact that she was happier without him, and that he could never make her laugh like whilst she held on her tummy as her face formed creases of joy. She was only on her way out when he saw her. It’s the happiest he’s ever seen her. No matter how much he loathed the cause of your glee, seeing her smile, grin and giggle made him float to the skies. He daydreamed about what it could sound like, her laughter. Must be delightful with how tightly the other guy had clutched onto her hand. Eunseok looked away before he could fall any deeper. He crossed the road, and her too. He caught a whiff of her almond saffron perfume, and he fished for her gaze only to be met with the eyes he despised the most. “Osaki Shotaro pisses me off.”

Eunseok was now in a cafe to meet up with Gaeul for the first time ever since asking her out to prom —impulsively. She was yet to arrive, so he got on the phone with his dear friend Yeonjun. “We know, we know. But if you’re that competitive why don’t you make moves huh?” Eunseok breathes out a scoff after hearing Yeonjun’s taunting.

“If you knew me at all, you know i’m all but competitive.” Eunseok kept his gaze on the bell above the door, any moment from then it could sound Gaeul’s arrival, not that it was enough for him to pay mind to.

“Yeah, you’re all that, aren’t you?” Yeonjun tittered from the other line. He calmed himself down at an instant when he realized that Eunseok was shut quiet. “You know, Sungchan told me something about his sister, Y/n.” Eunseok had parted his lips, but was unable to utter his next words —those which he had trouble finding— so Yeonjun spoke again, “He said she liked one of her best friends back then. It could be you or Shotaro, but what if it’s been you all along?”

Foot tapping at a pained tempo, Eunseok almost choked holding back a guffaw. “Me? Was I the one she’s been hanging out with? was I the one by her side when her dog died? or when she received such a shitty exchange gift when she had spent loads of time and money for her gift?” Eunseok swore he could see Yeonjun with pursed lips.

The bell sounded just as Yeonjun replied, “It’s not entirely impossible—” *phone beeps* Eunseok ends the phone when Gaeul greets him with heart eyes. Like every girl would.

It didn’t make sense to Eunseok. Every other girl liked him, stared at him for too long sometimes. You were —in his world— every girl. You were the girl that laughed at him when he skinned his knee while he raced against the wind with his bicycle. You were the girl that gave him your frosted animal crackers when he left his lunch box at home. You were the girl that hid her face when she cried after he had told her that he was moving away with his family. You were the girl that pretended not to recognize him at the themepark when he came around to visit again. You were the girl who continued to shun him everyday now that you were in the same highschool. You were all that —and more— to him. You were every girl in his life, in his story, in the little sit-com he lived in.

“So, what do you plan on taking for college?” he stared at the girl who queried him, though it was not clear to her —nor to himself what exactly he was staring for, or at rather.

Eunseok clears his throat, digging around in his mind for the answer, “I plan to take a b-a —uh, public relations.” he chuckled seeing how she fought the grimace from spreading throughout her face. “Sorry if i’m not the computer science or architecture typa guy.”

Gaeul quickly wards off any misunderstandings by hastily shaking her head as she utters, “Sorry, I just haven’t heard that from anyone before. In fact, I'm quite unfamiliar with it.” he leisurely nods, his teeth subtly digging into his bottom lip at the last rise of his head. “Would you mind explaining it to me? your career path and all.”

He raised his brows, a low chuckle, barely audible, was trapped behind his pressed lips. “No, not at all.” maybe, just maybe, he could get his head out of the past, the memories of you. You. Maybe after he’s gotten to know this girl that actually acknowledged his presence and seemed to be genuinely curious to seek for what’s beyond his social persona. The talk was definitely long enough for their lava-hot coffee cups to run cold. And surprisingly for him, there was more gained than said.

♪ ♪ ♪

Prom night came around, but before it did you made sure to avoid crossing paths with him, or taking turns at the wrong corners and run into him and Gaeul —again. You were never able to be verbal with how grateful you were that Shotaro had been sticking to you ever since you’ve gone to the boutique. His puns and your exchanged banters drew your attention away from Eunseok.

At prom night, Shotaro picked you up with his dad’s car. You scrambled around looking for your purse when you saw him from outside your living room window. He leaned his back against the driver’s seat door, waiting and anxiously fiddling with his fingers. You released a deep exhale once you were faced with your front door. Shotaro stared at the door mat, and when he saw that bright yellow skirt flowing with the cold wind of the night, he gazed up. His eyes lit up as if they had sparklers in them. He had seen you in this dress before —at the boutique, but somehow the atmosphere and the anticipation of taking your hand in his and dancing with you on the dance floor all night made him feel like it was his first time ever trying to catch your eyes behind that beige skimmer hat you wore.

With only a few five steps distancing the two of you, you greet him. “Hi.”

“Hello.” after a minute of —unnecessary— loud silence, you both burst out laughing. “I’m Shotaro, and this pretty girl’s name would be?...”

Your hands settled on your waist, tilting your head —and finally locking your eyes with his. Your lips would curve into a small smile, giving into his little roleplay. “The name's Y/n.” you hold your hand out for a handshake, and you receive it in no time.

“Well, good eve Miss Y/n. It’s my first time seeing you around here, perhaps you’re from out of town?” you suppress your giggle, lips pursed as you composed yourself.

“I could say the same about you.” he chuckles at you, eyes all smiley, like always.

“It doesn’t have to matter pretty, would you dance with me tonight?” he asks with raised brows, and a voice silk like whiskey.

Though his voice caused a short stagnation with your breathing, you cleared your throat, hoping that would ease the one-sided tension. Then suddenly, you gasped, “And for you to expect me to go out with a stranger? how bold!” and very dramatically too.

His eyes dilated, again, laughing against his lips. He gradually pulled his occupied hands from behind his back at the same pace at which he spoke. “Maybe, a little gift would change your mind?” and by then, a bouquet of chocolates —your favorite kind— was being waved, just slightly, right in front of you.

“What? I thought you were saving up? those are expensive!” a hefty load of air went through your nose, taking in the sweet scents of cocoa and sugar.

“Not really expensive, just pricey—”

“Same thing!” Shotaro’s chest was struck by your gentle hand, and he’d hold it there. Your palm was pressed against his heartbeat. You kept your eyes on your hand as you felt for the thumps on his chest. It was paced and certainly not calm. “Sho… you okay?”

With your gaze up at him and a flick of your lashes, his hand found its way on top of yours. And for a while, he’d clasp onto your hand, his grip growing tighter with every count of a second. He gently guides your hand off his chest, lowering it on level with your waist. “I’m taking that as a yes, pretty.” he utters softly as he guides you to the passenger seat of the car.

Once you were seated, you stared straight ahead, not minding Shotaro who went around again to get into the driver’s seat. You anxiously fiddled with the fabric of your skirt, and once you heard the driver’s seat door close, you patted down the cloth and smoothened it with your hands.

“Are you okay Y/n?” the boy beside you asks, and you —obviously— had thoughts running in your head by the looks of your eyes alone.

“Yeah, it’s just…” you were quite embarrassed to admit, “I don’t get why I’m like this either, but…” but it’s nothing Shotaro hadn’t heard from you, right? “I don’t know if I’ll enjoy it if I saw him there with another girl. I’m sorry, Sho.”

You watched as Shotaro’s hands took grasp of the wheel, his thumb grazing against the leather ever so slightly. “Prom is not about Song Eunseok. We can very much enjoy it without seeing him at all. How about we just pretend he doesn’t exist for the night? how’s that sound?” He was calm, and so sweet sounding. He held out his hand with his palm facing the sky, offering to ease your worries.

You took this offer, just for the sake of feeling better and getting your mind off of who wasn’t there for you, and who hasn’t been for eight years. “Thank you, Sho.”

Now his thumb grazed over the skin of your hand. “Anytime. You know I love you, right?”

“I know, you’ve been telling me that since we were kids.” you giggled at each other, before the engine started and you were both off to prom night.

♪ ♪ ♪

For most of the night, you stuck by Shotaro —as promised— and you two danced, even though you were quite the dancer yourself, he urged you to join him. It was fun, even more so for him. He was so kind to you tonight, so gentle. Well, he’s Shotaro, and he’s made you smile, giggle, titter with his little jokes, his compliments, his smile.

“Thank you for tonight.” you were sitting at an empty table. You had laid your head on your date’s shoulder as your eyes wandered around the scattered bunch of attendees dancing the night away.

Prom king and queen were to be announced after the current song, you heard from one of the other attendees. “Thanks to you too. I had loads of fun.” the back of his hand gently bumps against yours. You caught the signal, placing your hand on top of his palm. He closes in on your hand, and opens it again, then closes, and opens again, “Look, it’s an alligator.” he giggles right into your ear, continuing the closing and opening motion as he brings your entwined hands to your face.

“Sho!” you breathe out as a laugh follows shortly. “Hate to break it to you, but that’s not what an alligator looks like.”

“Oh, okay then.” he removed his hand from underneath yours, and soon your palms touched each other. You very carefully lift your head from his shoulder, and your eyes land on his face, observing the way his nose scrunched up when he started playing with your hands. “How about this?” he lifts your hands to your face again, showing the little alligator he had created with your joint hands.

And then your eyes meet. Your smile was so soft, as well as your eyes. He thought he was going to melt into a puddle. He just hoped nothing would ruin this serene view. You’re so delicate and beautiful. The night went exactly like how he planned —for the most part. You two were all smiles and laughs when your sides were pressed against each other or when your hands were connected. But one instance of you separating to get drinks for both you and him, he wasn’t expecting you to come back with tears brimming at the corners of your eyes. It was his instinct to always be there for you, and so he rushed to take you in his arms. It hurt him that you weakly tried to fight off his embrace, but then you broke into a sob and meekly laid your weight onto him. His hand encloses yours as he takes you back to the car. He thought about driving you home, so you can rest and feel better. But he took a turn away from where you lived.

“Where are we going, Sho?” your dainty voice pricked his heart.

“Just, somewhere.”

He didn't let go of your hand till he took you home, but until then, you both sat by the riverside with juice boxes and convenience store sandwiches.

“What’s wrong with me? he doesn’t even care about me, or you —at least not anymore.” you munched on the cold sandwich salted with your own tears as you spoke.

“Well, at least he doesn’t hate us, right? and look, I’m pretty sure if you asked him for help, or a favor or something, he won’t refuse.” Shotaro had his eyes on you only, even if he had asked you to take a breather and watch the river flow. He sighs softly, seeing your gloomy eyes blinked continuously to fight off the tears. “Friends grow apart, it really isn’t his fault he found friends he enjoyed being around with more than—”

“More than us. Yeah, I get it.” a bitter laugh escaped your lips, and you gulped as a single tear trickled down to the side of your face.

Shotaro was quick to not let it run down to your neck, wiping it off with a gentle touch to your face. You took a hold of his wrist, calmy removing his hand from your face and moving it to let it settle on his lap, but before you could let go of him, he brought your hand back in his with one swift motion. Your eyes grew wider than before, blinking a few more times as you held eye contact.

“Can I ask for a favor?” you blinked one more time at his question.

“Yes Sho.”

“I know you like Eunseok —still, and I know you don’t have it in you to just forget him, especially when we used to be the best of friends.”

You took a stuttered breath, eyeing Shotaro’s fingers as he drew shapes on your hand.

“But please, forget him.” and another stuttered breath. “It doesn’t have to be now —what I’m trying to say is, if he managed to stop looking out for you, I won’t. No matter what happens.” your eyes soften, keeping it locked with his. “Even if you say no to my favor.”

You raised your brows, visibly confused. “Isn’t the favor to forget about him?”

You felt his grip on your hand tighten, and you could see the movement in his throat as he gulped.

“Y/n, can I court you?”

♪ ♪ ♪

[Earlier that night…]

“And now, for prom king…”

It was undoubtedly,

“Song Eunseok!”

Great. Just great. Eunseok badly wanted to just drown in the crowds of people, but instead he allowed himself to be pushed onstage by his friends. And there he stood, next to the prom queen —thankfully, it was Yuna, and not just some other girl. The girl seemed to be ecstatic, giving Eunseok a high-five. Still, after being crowned and a brief photoshoot session, he hurried back to his date who wore rosey cheeks and a shy smile.

“Hi prom king.” She greets him as he gets closer.

Once he was right in front of her, she wrapped her arms around her neck. He wasn’t surprised, not until she got on her tiptoes to place her lips on his. Just for a short while.

“I like you, Eunseok.” he blinked once, biting onto his bottom lip.

He couldn’t quite figure out what it was, but suddenly his head was brought up —just above Gaeul’s head— where from a distance, he spotted you. Looking so sweet, so flawless in that yellow shirt dress. He loved how you just walked around with that smile he’d always daydream about. In those five seconds of him marveling in the sight of you, he never realized you were looking right at him, then at the shorter girl in front of him. And with a blink of an eye, you were gone.

“Eunseok?” he cleared his throat, finally looking back at Gaeul.

He ponders for a while, and he looks up again. Then he meets another pair of eyes. It belonged to the arms that held you that night as you sobbed.

“I like you too.”

It was all too late, wasn’t it? There was no way Shotaro hadn’t already planned to ask you out after tonight. Right?

[Two weeks later…]

“How’s it with Gaeul?” Eunseok shook his head at his friend’s query, almost laughing at the tone of his question.

“We’re fine, Chenle.” he replies with a slight sigh, which only drove his friend to question him more.

“Yeah, yeah. But, are you really over… you know.” Chenle brought his eyes to the side.

Eunseok knew better than to look at where his friend’s eyes laid on, instead he’d just answer him, “I’m not. But it wouldn’t hurt to try. Besides, doesn’t she look happier?”

“She does.” he almost broke into a pit of laughter with how fast Chenle responded to his words.

“She really does.” Eunseok would repeat to himself, only very subtly looking over at your direction.

So close, yet so far. And now, completely out of reach. He watched from the other end of the hallway as you unload your locker, and right next to you was Shotaro who held everything you took out of it, filling his hands. After closing your locker, you’d take half of what he held. Then you laughed. To this day Eunseok was still curious. Did your laugh sound any different after eight years?

“Bro, don’t you think you’ve been looking for too long?”

Eunseok finally parts his eyes from your sight, looking back at his friend with the smile he always wore around school, the one that no one could ever really tell whether it’s superficial or genuine.

“What do you mean? It’s only been eight minutes.”

And eight years.

♪ ♪ ♪

Highschool went by like a fly, so irritating that it lingered for a while. But you were happy that even though you’ve taken a dozen bites, you were still able to be the luckiest of the lucky. Especially with him by your side. Maybe it was too early to speak on things, but you are in your second year of college now, and he’s never stopped looking out for you. So you did the same for him.

“Hey Sho?” you spoke into your phone after the ringing stopped.

“Hi Y/n! sorry I can’t join you for lunch, but for dinner we’ll definitely—” he was cut off by your soft chuckle, finding himself freezing up for a second.

“I know Sho, you told me last night. So that’s why—” you took the steps up to his department’s building, stopping by the glass doors. “I’m here to drop off your lunch.”

“Lunch? Wait, I’m running down right now!”

“Entrance two.”

“Entrance two, got it —what did you get?”

“I cooked!”

“You cooked? holy shit, okay.”

You purse your lips as you suppress your laughter, and within under a minute, you see him running from the inside towards the transparent doors. He rushed out of the doors, greeting you with a hug. You were both giggling against each other.

“Sho!” you almost dropped the lunch bag when he spun you once.

His eyes smiled at you —like always— once he’s let go of you. You wore a wide smile, biting your lip as you extended your arm to give him the lunch bag. “This is way better than take out.”

You chortle and shake your head. “How would you know? you haven’t even tasted it yet!”

“I’ve tasted your ramen!”

“Instant ramen doesn’t count!”

You wished you could just bask in each other’s little banters and laughs, but eventually he had to go back to finish what he was working on.

“Natty will join us for dinner, she and Eric had another fight.” you tell him as you fixed his collar a bit.

“Again? What's going on with Eric?” you shrugged at him, finally smoothing out his shirt.

“Nobody knows.”

You understood why people fought, that sometimes, even the smallest things on the surface could indeed be plunged deeper than the depths of the oceans. Now all you could hope is for the couple to reconcile. You knew them both well enough by now to tell that both of them mean well at the end of the day and in some way are just trying to protect each other.

That’s why at dinner, you were all eyes and ears for Natty as she went on with the details of how everything went down, and you held her hand seeing that it was difficult for her to let it all out. By the end of the day, she’d thank you and Shotaro, and the two of you would be left in the confines of your apartment complex. The talk lasted for longer than what you’d expect —not that you mind— and when you looked out the window, the sky was black and blank. The street lamps were all lit, coloring the streets amidst the darkness. You breathe in once, turning around, only to be met with Shotaro who was getting ready to go home. From what you can recall, he wasn’t gonna be busy for a while.

“Sho?” his head snaps up from his shoelaces that he was only getting started to tie back up. He hummed you a reply, smiling so dearly and letting his eyebrows rise a tad. “Can I ask you a favor?”

He was a bit taken aback at your question, but he could never say no. “Yeah, of course! "What is it, pretty?”

That feeling you felt back at that old boutique was coming back to you, and in its fullest form. No longer something you would ward off and ignore, but something you wanted to accept and embrace. You thought maybe you were somewhat a bit standoffish, not being able to see through your best friend’s compliments and cute little nicknames —not to mention everything he’s done for you. You thought it was kind of funny. Then, it only took you eight seconds to spot Eunseok within a crowd, but it took you eight years to realize that your bestest friend of all saw you more than a best friend. Funny how you’ve kept Eunseok name at the top of your ‘funniest people I know’ list when no one had ever made you laugh as much as Shotaro did. You made a mental note to yourself to edit that later on, but for now,

“Stay for tonight. It’s quite late.” you glanced over to your wall clock. “A quarter till twelve.”

His eyes shifted around for a while, like he was looking for his answer around the space of your home. “If it’s fine with you, I would —but really, I can go home just fine. I can call you while I walk home.”

You chuckled, taking in his wide open eyes and slightly parted lips. You subtly chew on your bottom lip for a second before telling him, “I want you to stay, Sho.”

He was a frozen stick of butter by the time those words left your mouth. And he’d let himself melt when you came close to remove his scarf off of him. He removes his shoes, then his coat. And for a while you both stood in front of your door, just staring at each other before laughing at each other's faces —with no particular reason. He takes both of your hands, keeping them warm with his own.

“Now, about the favor…” your eyes shy away from him as he tilts his head.

He fishes for your eyes, asking, “Wasn’t this the favor?” a soft giggle escapes his mouth just as he finishes speaking.

You can’t help but giggle too. This time you look him right in the eyes. “Sho, we’ve been best friends for fourteen years.” he gulped at your words, feeling a little nervous with the way you spoke. “And you’ve been courting me for two years.”

“And a half.” he sheepishly adds.

You breathe out a laugh, “And a half.” you mumble as you intertwine your fingers with his. “I think we should stop being best friends.”

You can’t help but laugh at the way his face contorts at what you said. “Wait, what?” “Wait, what I’m trying to say is…” you both utter at the same time, still being mindful of your volume —you had neighbors after all.

“Can I be your girlfriend already?”

You were smothered with a hug, tiny pecks and his sweet giggles. The next thing you know, you were laying on your bed, all cuddled up against each other. He caresses your hair, something he’s always wanted to do.

“You know we can be together and be best friends at the same time, right?” he whispered to your ear, holding you closer to him.

You only hummed a reply to him, feeling too tired to open your eyes or speak up. You’d hear one last giggle and feel strands of your hair being moved out from your face before you drifted to sleep.

♪ ♪ ♪

[Eight months later…]

It was a busy day. You were lined up to seize an opportunity of a lifetime, and you haven’t even graduated college. You were hopeful that they might consider your talents. A wise man by the name of Shotaro once said, “Fashion design is your thing, you can do it! I bet twenty.” you really hope you’d lose that twenty bucks.

“Y/n?” you were spooked for a second, it’s a familiar voice. “Hi!” and a very familiar face.

“Gaeul?” your eyes dilated at the sight of her.

She’s just as pretty as the last time you saw her. “Long time no see!” she opened her arms, inviting you in for a small hug, which you accepted gleefully. “How have you been?”

That single question brought you to lunch with her, and of course you had to bring Shotaro along.

“I’ve always thought you two looked cute together, I’m glad to see the both of you happy.” she gives both of you a soft smile.

“Thanks, well, how about you? still with Eunseok?” you quietly gasp, stilling yourself in your seat but still knitting your brows at your boyfriend.

You felt that neither of you were really in the place to ask about her love life. “No, it’s okay!” Gaeul’s assurance helped calm your nerves. “I’m single.”

The two of you just nod, and you found that it was best to not pay much mind to it anymore. You engaged in constant conversation throughout your whole time eating, it was all very wholesome, and you were happy that Gaeul was making steps to achieving her dreams just like you were. The talk about relationships seemed to have sinked, well, not until Shotaro had to excuse himself in the bathroom.

“We were never together —at least it didn’t feel like it.” Gaeul’s utterance caught you off guard. You fell silent all of a sudden, and she noticed. “It never felt real. I cut ties with him after three weeks. And then he told me that—” she flicked her tongue over her top lip for a short while, “He liked you.”

You took a second to take a sip of water, gulping like you were drinking thick sand.

Despite parting with smiley farewells, her words dropped a heavy load on you. You carried it till you got back to your apartment and got settled on your bed. It was so heavy that you dropped it all on him, at a seemingly random moment.

“She said he had a picture of me from our 8th grade yearbook in his pocket.”

What you had shared with Shotaro struck him like livid thunder. He didn’t expect that Eunseok’s feelings for you would persist. He just wondered if it’s still there. But he could only hope for the best. Even after the whole conflict of two best friends liking the same girl —who also happened to be their best friend too— Shotaro still cared for Eunseok, even if he seemed entirely indifferent to him.

But it didn’t have to matter anymore. You chose him. He’s the one in your home, on your bed, always by your side, never to leave you.

♪ ♪ ♪

[Eight years later…]

What was once a small, dull colored room with faulty curtains and ugly flooring became a shared bedroom, in your shared house with the love of your life. Where the sunshine seeps at dawn, and the moon peeks at your dreaming bodies at night. It felt wonderful. Love felt so wonderful. Shortly after moving in together, you adopted a dog. You didn’t get that opportunity with that one clothing line back then, but now, you owned a line of your own. Your life couldn’t be anymore complete.

Even if it wasn’t perfect. The flaws only proved your happiness to be real. After a night of too much alcohol at your highschool reunion, Shotaro would tell you exactly why he stopped talking to Eunseok. He cried about it all, saying that he knew all along that you two liked each other. But you were all over it now, and it was Shotaro who’s been by your side. Not everyone was able to attend that reunion —because apparently they were too successful to be there.

Yuna, you knew she was a friend of Eunseok. She approached the two of you at your table, greeting the both of you with a warm smile. “My boyfriend’s having a stand-up show this saturday, I was hoping the two of you could come. In fact, he wanted me to invite you guys.” then you were given two tickets for the venue.

There weren’t any other details, the ticket was white, with not much but the title of the show.

The next morning, you’d discuss it with Shotaro on the dinner table. You were sitting next to each other, his arm wrapped around your waist and his head resting on top of yours. “The time is pretty tricky, I have work scheduled at that time.” he plants a kiss on your temple before continuing to speak, “You should definitely go though! I’ll pick you up after, then —remember that dog cafe I told you about? we have to visit it after.”

You giggled, looking up at him. He couldn’t resist by then, and would lower himself a bit to kiss you. And it wasn't a short one, more like a twenty-minute film. Nonetheless, it was beautiful, and you’ve never felt so loved.

That Saturday, you went to the venue alone, but not without having the sweetest breakfast of your life with your lover. Pancakes with chocolate syrup, whipped cream and a few berries, and of course, a cup of coffee before proceeding to your own schedules for the day.

You took the bus on the way there since Shotaro had to leave earlier. The show was a little later in the afternoon.

When you got there, you looked for any familiar faces, but it was only when you got seated that Yuna came and sat down next to you. You two greet each other with inviting smiles, and a few minutes before the show starts, you’d converse and catch up a bit, after all, it’s been eight years.

“Gentlemen.” a voice echoed throughout the room.

When you looked up at the stadium, “Gentlemen, may I have your attention —and ladies, I know I already got you.”

What a surprise. And it was a pleasant one at that. He fits this line of profession. He seemed to enjoy being up there, talking and joking about whatever. It was just like meeting him all over again. He’s just being himself up there. Your best friend from childhood, that sadly didn’t even make it till middle school. Now, you were finally able to laugh at his jests, sometimes stopping for a while to process what he was saying. Still, the atmosphere was light and fun. The audience was truly alive, and so were you.

At one point, he started talking about his girlfriend. Not quite hard for you to figure out since you remember Yuna mentioning at your reunion party that you were being invited to this show by her boyfriend, Song Eunseok.

“So, I finally decided to do something about it. I bought one of those electric blankets. Problem solved, right? Wrong. Now, our bed is divided like the Korean Demilitarized Zone. She’s over there toasty warm, and I’m on my side sweating like a marathon runner in a sauna. But you know what? I wouldn't trade her for anything. Because at the end of the day, it just gives me another reason to hold her close and keep her warm. And that, my friends, is how you win brownie points with your girlfriend.”

You can’t help but share a laugh with Yuna, letting her hold on to your shoulder as she titters.

Eunseok saw you, how could he not when you were sitting next to his girlfriend. He was only a bit curious about Shotaro’s absence.

You’d explain it to him at the end of the show, “Sho’s got work, but he’s coming to pick me up.” you both stood just outside the venue, at the side of the building with a little less people going around.

“Sho? What happened to Taro?” Eunseok raised a single brow, and you’d chuckle.

“Because you used to call him Taro.” you reply with a slight smile.

“Right.” he nods, his pace decreasing gradually as he tries to reach for something at the back of his tongue, “I’m just curious, did you actually hate me back then? like, when I moved and stuff.”

You chuckle a little louder, leaving him puzzled. “I liked you. I just avoided you. I just thought you didn’t care anymore.” you answer so simply, shrugging towards the end of your sentence.

“I thought you hated me, that’s why I wasn’t talking to you.” you took a sharp breath through your nose when he finished speaking.

Then suddenly you both snort at the whole thing.

“It’s funny.”

“It really is.”

As your laughter died down, he’d clear his throat to ask you, “So, are you and Taro married?” you could see his eyes locked on the ring on your finger.

“Engaged.” you nod, and he imitates your action.

“Wow. I should propose to Yuna right now.” your eyes widened an inch, he could be joking, but you wouldn’t be surprised if he actually did. Besides, you could tell how much he loved his girlfriend just by that one ment he did earlier at the show.

“So suddenly?”

“Yeah, so then we’d be even!”

It reminded you of a time in your childhood where you’d share your food with him because he forgot his lunchbox. You usually gave him more food, just cause you could, but then he’d give some back to you and he’d say, “Now we’re even.” it pulled on your heartstrings, but now you kinda wish you gave him just a piece or two of your animal crackers —and maybe two sips of your apple juice when the weather’s nice.

“I’m afraid I'd scare her off and she’d say no.”

“Really?” —you truly were a bit shocked that he was worried about being rejected. “Well, I believe she’ll say yes.”

“Really?” he imitates you again —the tone of your voice, “What makes you think that?”

You gave yourself a few seconds to think about what you were gonna answer to him. Suddenly you remember what you’ve written in your notes app. The funniest people I know. 1. Osaki Shotaro, 2. My dad, 3. Natty… he was off the list, but now, maybe it was for good reason. He was always known for being funny, now he has built a career out of it. Maybe, he was the greatest comedian of all.

“You might just be the greatest comedian I know.”

He laughs at your declaration of his greatness with his hands in his pocket, “I’m probably the only comedian you know.” —and more laughter.

He appreciated that you thought he was the greatest comedian. But as he looked back on the past, a past that was once painful, full of regret and missed opportunities, where you missed each other and realized only later in life. That period of your life would still prove to be pivotal. Right person, wrong time? maybe, but what else could it be other than silly memories when you find yourselves laughing about it. You’ve already settled for a love that you both deserve, a love that mended your hearts. It was all for the better, no matter how downcast all of it may seem. Worth a laugh, and a good story.

The story started with oblivion, and a bouquet of flowers you never received, but it ends with two pairs of engagement rings, and two pairs of smiling hearts. That’s four people —in case you missed it.

God did a great job writing their fate. And to Eunseok, God is the greatest comedian of all.

End.

cheers to a hundred peeps!! :3

#riize #briize #riize fanfic #riize au #riize x reader #riize fluff #riize angst #riize shotaro #shotaro #osaki shotaro #riize eunseok #song eunseok #eunseok

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