I’m on my 827382937292th rewatch of the carriage scene so here’s some things that are still driving me insane:
1. Penelope first of all, running her hand through his hair and then continuing to grip onto his scalp like her life depended on it
2. The way he lifts her up. That’s it, that’s the comment.
3. The way their kisses are soft and tender but also hungry and truly porny tbh
4. Colin being a boob guy. Slay
5. ✨ CONSENT KING ✨
6. His thumb tracing round her leg… oooft 😮💨 (also hands…)
7. The way he looks kinda concerned initially but she draws him in closer
8. Colin’s hair looking totally disheveled
9. Just the fact that she was sat and he was on his knees the entire time
10. The giggling and the sweet ‘we finally got here’ kiss after all the steaminess
11. Aftercare 🥹
12. The way he says “are you coming with me”… I can’t explain why but good god it makes me feel things
Anyways…
The 13th needs to get here quick or else I’m gonna start ripping clumps out my carpet with my bare hands
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The agonising feel when a character tag is full of shipping that you Simply Do Not Vibe With. The solution is, naturally, to keep scrolling. But the wince, the WINCE.
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The world exists in such a baffling state of simultaneous sex-aversion and sex-hegemony. Every social platform on the internet is trying to banish sex workers to the shadow realm but I can't post a tweet without at least two bots replying P U S S Y I N B I O. People are self-censoring sex to seggs and $3× but every other ad you see is still filled with half-naked women. Rightwingers want queer people arrested for so much as existing in the same postal code as a child and are also drumming up a moral panic about how teenage boys aren't getting laid enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind.
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I think a lot of people haven't actually read Flatland so you may not realize A. What Bill's eye mutation means and B. What precisely Bill did to destroy his homeworld.
Bill's home isn't completely the same as Edwin Abbott's Flatland: A Romance of Many Dimensions (notably, women and men can be both polygons #feminism) but we can assume most of the mechanics are the same. The basic premise is that the world is 2D. Everyone perceives the world in a 1D way, along the plane. There's a part of Journal 3 that describes this pretty well.
Bill can see up to the stars because his eye is on the flat surface instead of on the side like everyone else, like this:
(He's also slightly 3D, as we can see in the show.)
But there's one more important Flatland detail. The denizens of Flatland (and therefore likely Euclydia) do still have organs "inside" their bodies. Since there is no depth, they're just on the inner radius of their bodies. The 2007 Ehlinger movie adaptation shows that:
If Bill wanted to "give his world a new perspective" and "show everyone what they were missing," he wanted to get everyone to look upward.
Meaning he probably tilted the entire world.
Meaning everyone not only slid off of the plane, but all of their organs spilled out and everyone died.
...Hence "so much blood."
(The only issue with this is that it doesn't account for the number of times Euclydia is referred to have been burned ("saw his own dimension burn / misses home and can't return", he only has ashes leftover), but I'm sure the act of turning an entire dimension upwards expends a lot of energy.)
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Also increasingly aware that a LOT of people "manage" getting through the 40+ hour work week by sleeping less than is healthy and relying on stimulants like coffee and energy drinks to keep them going.
For people who are unwilling or unable to do this...work really does just dominate your life. Like we really should not have to rely on unhealthy practices just to have a social life or keep on top of housework or whatever.
I know I post about this a lot but I'm so TIRED all the time and it's just so depressing that this is how we're expected to spend the one life we have.
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Y’know… I was content with the fact that I’ve always been single and I’m probably gonna die alone and get eaten by my cats… but this god damn show is driving me to INSANITY because it’s given me fucking HOPE that the wallflowers and awkward gals CAN FIND THE LOVE OF THEIR LIFE and be HAPPY and I’m totally FINE about it, totally not YEARNING and WISHING and DREAMING of what they have every single night since MAY 16TH I am so SO so SO NORMAL ABOUT THEM
Polin has ruined me
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I think so many people are so deeply alienated from themselves that they have no clue how to exercise their free will and autonomy. For some, this alienation runs so deep that they are afraid of their own autonomy and humanity. It is completely understandable why one would have those feelings, but it can be worrisome.
I want to help others who feel this way, so here are small things I have done to exercise my free will:
Add "guilty pleasure" songs to playlists and actually listen to them (I have a ton of late 1990s-early 2000s music I listen to now proudly that I never listened to in the past out of shame)
Getting the décor item, bath set, bed spread, ect. in the patterns you like, even if it's "childish" (I got a dinosaur-themed wastebasket from the kids' décor section and I adore it)
Taking a new route to get to a place you go to often
Eat dessert first
Celebrate well, and often
Collect things that are "odd" or don't seem like an "acceptable" thing to collect (somebody on my "for you" page collects dandelion crayola crayons and it was so cool!!!!!!)
Incorporate one new piece in an outfit you wear frequently (e.g., a new chain, a necklace, ribbons, bracelets, ect.). Challenge yourself to add onto the outfits if you feel up for it.
Sing along to songs without worrying that you sound "good" or your intonation is completely accurate
Read a book from a genre you weren't allowed to read as a kid (comics, thrillers, mysteries, anything!)
Walk without having a specific destination or goal
Pick up a new craft without expecting yourself to master it or to ever be "good" enough. Get your hands messy.
I don't want to shame anybody for not feeling as though they have free will or that they are exempt from exercising it. However, I wanted to give ideas so that you might read this list and find your own ways to express your intrinsic autonomy and will. You deserve to be a person, to feel alive, not just living. That is what our lives are for.
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