#i want what they have aughhhh
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in all timelines, in all possibilities, only you...
#fellas is it gay to gently caress your partner's skin and put your foreheads tgt while you both disintegrating into nothingness š„²#i want what they have aughhhh#jayvik#arcane#arcane season 2#jayce talis#viktor arcane#arcane fanart#arcane season 2 spoilers
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in all timelines, in all possibilities, only youā¦(Read More)
#fellas is it gay to gently caress your partner's skin and put your foreheads tgt while you both disintegrating into nothingness š„²#i want what they have aughhhh#jayvik#arcane#arcane season 2#jayce talis#viktor arcane#arcane fanart#arcane season 2 spoilers
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What's the best Tokyo Revengers ship and why is it DoraMitsu
Maybe it's because they're my second and third favorite characters in the series. Maybe it's because I'm an absolute sucker for best friends to lovers relationships. But maybe it's also just an amazing ship in the first place
Like we don't get nearly enough interactions between them in the manga that aren't flashbacks or just short one-off things, but MAN. Their dynamic just has me in TEARS.
I would actually die for them I love them so much
#doramitsu#dramitsu#draken x mitsuya#tokyo revengers#I WANT WHAT THEY HAVE AUGHHHH#draken#mitsuya#ken ryuguji#ryuguji ken#takashi mitsuya#mitsuya takashi
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looking and staring at the fact bloodmoons jealous of lunar being brought back but not him but also disregarding the entirety LUNAR was the one to promise him a body.
#Monty may have made it but they were hesitant of it#like legit Lunar was like 'YEAH MONTY WILL GET U THESE!' monty being roped into this unwillingly 'yeah... yeah okay buddy'#monty favors lunar a lot thats his best friend and WOULD spoil him so like#interesting this current bloodmoons more mad at lunar for being so favored and brought back#literally mad at him cause lunar was a replacement. despite never feeling that before until AFTER resurection#(for both mind you)#i bet ruin sure reminded them of how much he was discarded by Eclipse and everyone else but NOT ruin :))#(lunar i feel wouldnt have if not for the everyone LITERALLY NEVER BRINGING IT UP AGAIN GDI)#but ooooh we gonna get some brotherly bonding over death and eclipse and replacements#ah yessss i can feel it#if the show will ever give me this#knowing them theyll want to keep them seperated esp after bloodmoon attacked lunar#now its a monty thing#and it wouldnt be a bad thing but also Monty legit didnt like the guyv bnjsk#lunar at least has some idea WHO bloodmoon really is what eclipse did and#AUGHHHH#THEYLL NEVER GIVE ME THIS ITS NOT THE CURRENT TOPIC ON THE SHOW I KNOW#a girl can hope cause of the new lore drop and implications#sun and moon show#sun and moon show spoilers#I GUES#man much rambling in the tags its so easy to ramble here
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me who doesn't want to be in college for five years: we gotta lock in dude we gotta get it over with and finish this film
the evil voice in my head that's also in charge of the part of my brain that likes handicrafts: 20CM EMA SKYE PLUSHIE
#.docx#AUGHHHH CURSE THE SECOND EVIL VOICE IN MY HEAD THAT'S IN CHARGE OF IMPULSIVE PURCHASES#BC NOW I HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED TO MAKE HER#god what's next after her. we're going to finish prototyping the susato plush? is that what you want?#they need to let me out of the torment nexus (thesis)
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Can there be news about anything pleaseā¦
#wisdom sagaā¦#trial 3ā¦#it feels so barren here š#and I have to go back to classes aughhhh#I really donāt want to commute again but I guess I have to#I thought about too much today and now Iām just :/#existential moment#I wish it was easier to gauge what my feelings are on certain things#I wish I didn't need to feel so much and feel so strongly over stuff either#I simply just want to love and to be but if only it was that simple#I feel empty now#might delete this later idk#my posts
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"oh sakura is the rin of team 7 cuz they're both gealers" "naruto is the rin of team 7 cuz they're both optimistic" WRONG sasuke is the rin of team 7 on account of they both equate "having goals" with "being a person."
#do you see my vision#guys who hinge their entire identity on what they set out to accomplish lmao lmao#i mean everyone's a little guilty of that but they're by far the worst offenders#nohara āif i want to throw the earth into the sun surely i will get a good grade in being a personā rin#and uchiha āi am an avenger i will kill my brother i wll fulfil my purpose and then like. die i guessā sasuke#its the trauma <3 and the masks <3 and the assumptions that somewhere deep down they have a āreal selfā#(they dont cuz thats not how personing works. but they think they do. and they're very put out because they cant find it)#i just think they're neat :3333#oh kakashi is sakura of course of course (aughhhh self flagulation aufg augh)#and naruto is obito. i guess cannon can have that one.#mann naruto makes me sad. golden retrivor of a guy who wanted to change things#but got beat down by the system he wanted to challenge until he was complicit in it. sad!#anyways someday i will compile my thoughts on how rin and sasuke disengage witg the shinobi system#by just. having different values. and Not Caring about that junk#i mean dont get me wrong theres smth wrong with both of them still. its just like. a different#weird problem#ok cool. walks off into the ocean
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Having to accept that this mod thing isn't going to get done cause i just can't figure it out why the end result keeps being a mess. Goodbye you problematic bitch, you'll be in my dreams...
#dragon age#da2#there'll always be fanart but i really wanted to play with her >:'/#probably delete later i just want to air my frustration#tbd#Why does the mmh not have the right names!!!1#why does the mesh look messed up when its done!!!!!!!!!#i don't know! i did what the tuts said! aughhhh
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Personally I cant do really early days STARS/RPD era Chreon for a lot of reasons, one being I'm just not interested in it because theyre cops at the time, but the other reason is that like. Part of what Compels me about these two as a pairing is seeing them years down the line when theyve already been in the fight for awhile against bioweapons and all that and theyre on equal footing in their own right. Chris is a BSAA captain, Leon is a capable agent, it puts them on equal ground but it also means that they've already seen so much shit that they Know what each other has been through this whole time.
I think both of them struggle with the notion of wanting a relationship, and even just with friends at times, because they don't to involve anyone on the outside of the fight who doesn't understand the depths of things. People who don't understand that this will probably end in death or heartbreak, or even just watching someone you love get hurt a lot and having to deal with that pain. And its That unique situation that makes Leon and Chris compelling to me personally, because here's two guys in the thick of it who Know the risks and the threats inside and out and they chose to say "No, I'm going to care about you reguardless because its better to go thru this together than alone, even if it hurts" and I dunno man, something about that kind of defiance, especially with how headstrong they are just as separate individuals, it gets me.
#this could also apply to valenfield for what its worth but im talking about chreon because thats where my interest personally lies#but its also why everytime i think about vendetta specifically my heart starts aching because that fuckin bar scene gets to me#chris can see in leon the same struggle he was having in edonia and he doesnt want that for him. hed rather support him thru it#than see him lose to the drinking like he did#it fucking gets to mee#and then theres leons bit in 6 after he and chris fight#where he says 'Chris has been in this fight as long as I have. I Trust Him.ā#and we barely Ever hear leon say that about anyone so you Know it means something that he trusts chris#just. fuckin god man they fuck me up#aughhhh#chreon#kief rambles about resident evil
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Okay, so not fanfic/writing stuff but do you ever think of how close Calla and Kody used to be? How sweet and bright and encouraging she was towards him when they were younger? How friendly and warm she was? How they smiled at each other? It makes me want to eat rocks.
#Lumine#Lumine webcomic#Lumine (webcomic)#Lumine (webtoon)#Lumine webtoon#And then ableism starts dragging Kody down.#Dozens of things that are either pinpricks or full-on bricks getting slammed into him (figuratively. I do not mean. Kody got beaten with#bricks.)#''It's not like he could have played anyway--he can't use magic''#Kody's disappointment and heartbreak at not being able to use magic like the other witch kids#Him finding other ways of being a witch (potion making) to accommodate to his limitations#But still not being seen as a proper witch according to some (i.e. Calla's family; ''they could forbid me from seeing you/us being friends#if they found out'')#Anyways I don't really know where I was going with this but it just makes my heart Ache#I can't remember how canon it is (I'll find out soon) but I always imagined that Camille had a heavy focus on potions;#I feel like she really appreciates potionmaking and the uses/applications of it; how versatile it is and while it isn't as convenient as#general magic--having a potion prepped in-advance would be pretty useful and convenient. Especially if you got too tired to actually do#general magic or something was blocking it off.#It's why I think she would be a good parental figure or aunt figure or mentor or SOMETHING to Kody#Kody finding a way to accommodate to his illness and disabilities by trying potion making has always been something that's stuck out to me#That doesn't take away the grief or pain of Not being able to do it ''the normal way'' but it gives you SOMETHING. Any connection to what#you love dearly and want to do.#This was Not meant to be a rant on disability stuff whoopsie. And yet here I am. I'm gonna cut it off there.#If this didn't make sense sorry the migraine-hangover brainfog is eating my words alive#My heart just hurts over their old friendship and how sweet they were#Also forgot that Kody wanted to open a bakery when he's older... Aughhhh. Implodes into 500 tiny shrapnel forever.
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People are so mean about SRS. What did they ever do to you </3
#Sorry sorry I do get that SRS didn't give Spearmaster a name out of lack of thought but cmon.#They're not some evil cruel mastermind they are just. Desperate to help their friend. They make questionable decisions but.#It's never with cruel intentions. They just. Care about Five Pebbles and emphasises with his situation and wants to help#Headcanons and AU's and character trait expansions are FINE but cmon. Cmonnn#Idk. I don't. Buy that SRS never cared about spearmers. Like. If they didn't care at least a little bit#Why would they go through the effort of communicating through it with means more understandable to spearmers than just.#Giving it the mark of communication. I can't pull up Rain World rn to check what they said but like. Cmonnn. :(((#I have always thought people where a bit mean about SRS and actually getting the broadcasts confirmed that feeling for me. Yeagh#SRS comes across as blunt and makes some questionable decisions but it's only because they care so hard. Aughhhh#;~; wahhhhh#android.txt
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thinking more thoughts!!
Kiley time-
I uh- kind of poured all my chaotic energy into her, and separated her from the rest of the npc cast? Otherwise the dialogue would get totally fucked, and my āI need to hit this story with a drama nukeā desire would cause trouble.
So sheās uhhh off on her adventure of a different genre. (But stuff she does Will affect things... dun dun dunnnn) but dude Wow she would be so irritated by Jun. Good thing weāre going to Sanctuary to leave them and take Preston.... OR THAT IS WHAT I WOULD SAY if she didnāt want to be anywhere near the vault!! Weāre going somewhere else, babeyyyyy! Maybe talking with him and Murphy would bring some understanding (is what I would say if I were doing big character development in the beginning but weāre not!!) Shoving my desire for conflict into this.
#also Iāve gotten into rain world! so we may see some influence#...thinking of. the rot. and throwing it into jerās world#what huh who said that#we already had the idea of giant salamanders so that might inspire me to draw them more!#I wonder since towns are more developed in this au thereās also more education? and people are a bit more mindful of the environment? maybe#oh but kiley would definitely agree with that guy who said baseball was a blood sport. COMMIT TO THE BIT#also I broke a nail :( not touching skin but just fucking up the edge. aughhhh#WAIT unrelated I was wondering. sandpaper. does that exist?? sanding belts?? could you sand sharp edges on your armor??#also I was thinking... well alread though of but still. fabrics. we have sheep (and also impostor sheep. huh who said that) so we have WOOL#so people must be making cool new clothes and fashions. maybe going back to that idea of- if you have more/colourful fabric youāre cooler?#jer has a little patterned poncho and I think kiley would want a cloak with jagged edges! colour? .... I will think on it.#cool points vs camouflage vs character desires#hrhhh also good thing preston is. desperate. well good for my desire for horrible character conflict anyway HAHA-#and you know what maybe preston should talk to people more and buy something cool at a shop- variety is the spice of life#hmmm I need to look at the workshop benches again#hmmmmhhhhhh maybe we could get preston into adventuring and killing raiders. as a way to get money for food n shelter for the crew#prestonās traveling group is pretty big. ...what have they been eating?#oh and then that would spread good rumors about the minutemen!#little wastrels#ALSO itās autumn so they better find a place to stay before winter. thinking on... animal seasons also- I imagine deathclaws hibernate#and wake up in the spring like frogs. donāt @ me about it ok#do mole rats hibernate?#do people need to store food for the winter? is there such thing as charity donations in fallout?#... do I have a winter exclusive animal I canāt remember#hm. Anyways Kileyās thinkin strength in numbers yāknow (but thennnn jun and murphy canāt fight really)#STURGES#you know what I said letās make him take the power armor. mr mechanic would know how to use it best no?#hmm Iām sure preston has useful info on the wastes and settlement locations#sheāll stick around till thereās nothing useful left/they get into a very very bad argument#but again WHAT WERE THEY EATING.
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going to the dentist tomorrow to pay money so a dude tells me my teeth are shit and I need to get hit by a car š
#txt#no seriously there's like one dentist who doesnt make me want to kms when i visit her#this guy i have an appointment with tomorrow is a good surgeon and thats what i need#but i also remember him being slightly rude...#aughhhh the agony of having shitty teeth
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i would make. so much more art. if i didnt get that a.utism or adh.d Rage bubbling up inside me so often when i'm unable draw smth the way i want to fdshgjkl, there have been many a night where i try to draw smth and end up closing out of the program in a huff after 30 minutes bc i get legitimately worried that im going to break the pen out of sheer frustration fdsjfkl
#i wish i did not get so frustrated bc its like. man chill. its not that serious dsjkl art is supposed to be fun my guy. settle down.#but i cannot control the frustration š i try to keep reminding myself it doesnt have to be perfect but i can't even get it halfway decent!#anyways fuck side profiles all the homies hate side profiles dsfjkl i cannot figure them out to save my life i swear to fucking god#esp the mouth and chin. why are those are so goddamn impossible šššš#and the eye placement is the devil.... im gonna cry for real fdsjkl i just wanted to draw a quick loose sketch and i CAN'T !!!!!!#im never gonna be able to take comms dsfjkl my art capabilities each night seem to be a complete tossup and out of my control AUGHHHH#doesnt matter what sort of warmups i do.... i can do the same shit every night or completely different stuff and it'll always be a tossup#its so weird and frustrating fdsjkl idk why that happens. would love a bit of consistency !!! or some kind of half-reliable formula!!#dandy.cmd#vent //
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working here is making me a little bit nuts abt antibullying again <3
#i mean ive always been a little nuts abt it. but its worse rn :)#i have been saying For Years that the reason antibullying campaigns have been so toothless is bc theyve ignored root causes#you cannot fight bullying while ignoring discrimination in our larger society#its not a fucking 80s movie people dont (frequently) get bullied Just for being nerds irl. the go to examples are so outdated#i could get into specifics but i think i dont need to! its ableism its racism its classism etc etc etc#we need to be actively teaching kids from a young age that at the bare minimum? acting on discriminatory beliefs is wrong#there needs to be actual consequences and understanding of why its wrong#we need to talk abt these issues WITH specifics. talk abt exactly whats wrong and why#call out specific common jokes explain slurs talk abt current events related to these issues#and fucking get rid of the 0 tolerance bullshit ive never heard of it doing anything but punishing the victim for fighting back#and i know some people will still be missed by this programming bc of their home life or influences. you really cant win them all#but you at least need to fucking try and attack this problem from the root instead of snipping vaguely at leaves#levi.txt#and i dont want to hear SHIT abt how your precious baby is too young to learn abt discrimination bc itll make them sad#as long as there are kids their age facing it? theyre not too young to try and understand#i just. aughhhh#like. ive been there dude i got bullied for a long ass time#didnt know why at the time but looking back it was absolutely bc i was nd#and that was so long ago and its still not better. it fuckin kills me man we should be getting over this#delete later#im very tired and this is a Big Rant but idfk man!! im mad#this shit ends lives youd think wed take it more seriously
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donāt know how 2 say āif I unfollow u as a mutual I promise itās nothing personalā without just saying it but like. If u primarily rb unrelated stuff frum art I might unfollow from time 2 time (esp if itās a lot of discourse related stuff) bc Iām becoming increasingly aware of how bad I am at monitoring and filtering my own racing thoughts when it comes to viewing an excessive amount of discourse posts. I will still check in and rb and probably even refollow once I get my brain set back on track but yah. If this means anything
#I was on a rly good streak for a while where I had my online vibe curated rly well and now itās all strange again and Iām aughhhh aughh!#itās nothing personal to anyone I follow mutual or otherwise I genuinely have really poor control over racing thoughts and stuff.#this obviously excludes the important current events going on Iām talking abt just. More general stuff.#that rly only applies to me specifically.#I just wish that there were easier ways to go about interacting w my online friends bc auuu auuuu I donāt wanna ābreak the mutualā#I donāt want ppl to think I donāt like interacting or seeing their stuff all the time#but when itās like a 9:1 media criticism / queer discourse to art ratio#even when itās like! stuff I agree about! Eventually it just makes my brain spin like a top .#AUGH.#text posts :0]#ramgling sorry I just got a sudden Very fucking bad stint of anxiety and am realizing I gotta remember what made being online Enjoyable#If Iām going to Keep being here
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