#and I miss my cat so fucking bad
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#i just got back to my place after holidays and I'm feeling so homesick#i want my family closer to me#i want to see them more often and for longer time#and I hate that whenever I come home i have to split my time between mom and dad#and now my dad os going through something and it's breaking my heart#because he's always the funny and silly one...always happy and now he reminds me of himself when he was divorcing my mom#i am so grateful that I spent new year's with him and that he wasn't alone#i even miss his cigarette smoke infused apartment#and my mom's weird cooking and her her candles and essential oils#and I wish my brother would appreciate all this more and not see us as a burden#i love him but I want him to grow up finally#and today before I left everyone hugged me a little tighter and a little longer#and now it's making me cry because I won't feel a human touch like that until next time I get home and that will be easter#those holidays went too fast and I want at least one more week like that#and it's all about those mundane things that make my heart beat faster#like when I went grocery shopping with my dad on new year's#or when I was just sitting and watching my mom cook#and I miss my cat so fucking bad#I'm so happy he spent another year with us#i don't even want to think about it but each year I get worried that it's his last Christmas with us because he's getting so old#and now I'm here alone and I love it that I can do my own thing and I don't share my apartment with anyone#but I just want them a little closer#i don't like how limited is my time with my own family#I'm super emotional tonight#I know it will pass in few days but today the feelings are super raw#because for more than a week I was never alone and always surrounded by love and my favourite people on Earth#and I went to being totally alone right now#i should go to sleep because I'm exhausted and I'm waking up at five tomorrow#guys...i hope you all had wonderful holidays and i wish each of you all the absolute best in 2024!
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searching for a star that's still unknown to anyone!
#for finncakes.arts dtiys on instagram... i missed you wxs#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#emu otori#tsukasa tenma#nene kusanagi#rui kamishiro#wonderlands x showtime#wxs#polysho#my ipad did not survive this one its at 3% after like 5 procreate crashes#and sending me visions of it being put down like a dog. Not happening#kirapipi album release im FREE#wxs getting 1 another wanopo comm and 2 a traditional japanese style song. ive been saying they need it. emu deep voice can save the world#I drew emus recent card the untrained but i dont KNOW HOW TO RENDER SNYMORE IDK HOW TO DO IT. SO SHES TRAPPED#in my wip art timeloop for eternity.#tsukasa is pissing me off so bad in this no matter how many times i drew and redrew his head imhe just completely breaks the illusion of#depth i think i actually did alright on rui and emu. i love how theynlook. Went hard rendering tsukasas outfit i guess which.#pisses me off MORE. its NOT THE FOCAL POINT. TSUKASA INHOPE YOUR NEXT LIM HAIRCUT IS EVEN MORE STUPID. YOURE RUINING MY LIFE.#whats supposed to be his hand is so fucked up with the perspective too helppp me just pretend its nenes.#the tonal difference from my ladt post is so funny. fuck you siffrin you stupud cat
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GET FRAGGLE-IFIED‼️‼️‼️
So recently I’ve been more than a little obsessed with the 1983 Jim Henson company project called “Fraggle Rock,” about all these silly little muppet creatures having crazy adventures in the cave system in which they live, called, appropriately, Fraggle rock. After watching 3/4 of the seasons, I started doodling some of my fav cats OCs as fraggles, and it just sort of spiraled from there. So if I’ve sent you 🫵 an ask about the kind of clothing your oc would wear, this is why :D. Without further ado:
THE FIRST WAVE‼️‼️‼️
These are the tallest of the bunch, and they are, reading left-right left-right:
@gotham-native’s Calypso, @ernestelm’s Vega, @toki-toro’s Chaumet, and last but certainly not least, @cillyscribbles’s Tin Tin!!!!
#I DONT KNOW WHAT TO TAG THIS ‼️‼️‼️#I’ve been working on nothing but this for weeks#cilly thank you genuinely for keeping me going 😭😭😭#I’m so fucking obsessed with this show#I wanted to do this so so so bad I like cried thinking about it genuinely don’t know what’s wrong with me#ANYHOW!!!!#THESE WERE SO FUCKING FUN‼️#I missed drawing peoples OCs so badly#I don’t know why I stopped doing that#this was in fact the au I was working on btw#Fraggle rock au!!#calypso looks so cool and slay she was the last one I did and she’s so gorgeous#bc she’s a lil punk rock and fraggle-ified foxglove dresses the same#I kinda imagine he looks up to her a bit#thank you to pintrest for sponsoring this post/j#no but that’s where I got half the outfits done#got this project done literally the day before I go back to school ✌️#cats the musical#cats musical#cats oc#jellicle oc#fraggle rock#fraggle oc#I think those tags work? idk#sorah’s silly scribbles#fragglecats#this is so incredibly self indulgent maybe the first project I’ve done in a while that was specifically for my enjoyment lol
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I've started playing Potion Permit, and so far it's one of my favorite games I've messed around with, but the most big brained move the devs made was giving you a dog on day 1, and then making that dog able to track NPCs and lead you directly to them no matter where they are in the town.
#im still early game but i like the play and the writing is passable#like#Theres a flatness#the characters Are distinct but theyre mostly just their jobs#with only a few who stand out and have like. something to really grab onto#Like rue? rues entire deal is little girl you can date. Nothing else behind those eyes. She has nothing better to talk to you about#than the fact her favorite color is red#Sorcelia? Sorcelia is a goth nun who loves singing and teaches one of the village children#Reynerd? sure is a guy#got nothing else to say about him. hes just a Guy™. Victor? Has ghost friends and loves bugs and cares deeply about the cemetery#he tends to. At the moment it feels like they're trying to imply there aren't actually ghosts. and hes just talking to himself/#insisting his imaginary friends are real people#and so far? The games been cool about it. Victor's a member of his community and his eccentricities are accepted and not ridiculed#all four characters ive mentioned are romance candidates. but its just as hit or miss with the regular towns folk#Opalheart is an older woman and a world renowned blacksmith who only takes jobs if they will do Good. regardless of whether or not they#pay well. She declines to make a dagger for a rich man but makes a helmet for a childs father bc the girl asked#and olive is here#anyways you can be best friends with a cat (shes just a regular cat) and i appreciate that#idk im putting it above sun haven in my ranking of life sim games#purely because there are older romance candidates.#no fat romance candidates. but sun haven doesn't have thise either.#and sdv has neither fat or old candidates Nor can you fuck a cat boy. it goes at the bottom.#gameplay wise sunhaven is at the bottom then sdv then potion permit at the top. sunhaven has the Most™ but having#a lot of crap doesn't mean its fun and it ends up making half the game feel really incomplete#idk. Sdv is a game you should've started playing a year ago. sun haven is a game that perpetually needs another year worth of updates#before id say its worth it bc the devs keep pushing content ™ updates instead of quality of life or polish so what is there is uh#Bad. plentiful. and a large portion is good#but a Lot is just bad.#its insincere and cant take itself seriously it gives you (the right dialogue option) an (the shit joke option) which is worse than just#i ram out of space. tldr. potion permit is good Now. sdv Was good. sun haven Might be great Eventually
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My cat died over the weekend whilst I was away from home. Before I knew, I had a dream where we were sitting outside in the garden and he was fat again and happy.
#also hi i had a bad mental breakdown and deleted all social media and thinking about being online makes me want to kill myself#anyway my cat died + i miss him already + i cant believe i'll never get yelled at again or get claws stuck in my leg or hold him like a bab#he used to make biscuits constantly even if he was just sitting on the floor like he was so full of love#he used to lay on the path in the hope that strangers would pet him#he got so fucking thin and confused and couldnt meow anymore#anyway i'm off to delete tumblr again
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getting him next week <3
#excited but in a suicidal way#still miss my baby boy like a phantom limb. im fine when i dont think about him but i think about him always#still couldn't bring myself to put any of his things away. i just miss him so bad#still cant look at pictures of him without dry heaving and a full emotional breakdown#god i just want him the fuck back thats my baby i need him#anways#kitkat#cats of tumblr#cats#he really said EARS
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crying at the airport whos with me
#im back in sf and i missed my shuttle so im gonna be home an hour later than expected and i just want to see my cat so fucking bad#i’m actually crying abt it. and everything else
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My mom getting a new place is kinda making me anxious I think she thinks I’m gonna move in w her instead of my dad 😭 and I’m not sure why I don’t want to. Cuz she’s way better. But I don’t. And I feel responsible I think and plus my sisters will never favor my mom over my dad… so we’d live apart. but I’m 20 years old I can live whatever I want. But. But but but
#idk I really like our house too. it’s great. it’s exactly my style. I would miss it LMAO#but again my mom is just.. she’s so much more organized and she and my stepdad actually get stuff done#and take care of themselves. living w her would be more like we’re roommates and not how it is w my dad#who needs to be taken care of and doted on like a child. my sisters too but I don’t think they’d survive living without me at my dads 💀#or they’d be really pissed at me. at the least#my dads house is constantly horrible so messy so so so bad no free counterspace anywhere can barely walk thru the house and cat vomit#everywhere. unless I take care of all of it. I can’t have company over unless I know a week in advance so I can make it look like a normal#house. and at my moms it’s never like that. it’s messier than average sure but it’s never disgusting like that#people are always telling me not to do anything and let my family learn to clean up after themselves but if I don’t it will just get worse#and worse. they’ll wait weeks before doing anything. it’s embarrassing. and depressing. if I let it go long enough I am miserable every day#after being homeless or on the verge of homelessness for 10 years my dad can’t even appreciate the fantastic house we have 😭#he has to fuck it all up. it’s not 100% his fault bc my sisters do fuck all but he DID teach them to be this way. the only reason I do#anything is because I snapped out of planning to kill myself and realized that I needed to be there for my sisters. so I started being like#their parent more and more. but they still never learned to unload the dishwasher or take out the trash without screaming about it.#I’m just very overwhelmed and nervous about this move. I also feel horrible as if I’m disappointing my mom if I don’t move in. I don’t want#to disappoint her any more than I already have..#she is soooo excited about giving me a room the basement so I can have my bunnies there..
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i want nothing more than for Ezra & Thrawn to be not enemies, not friends, but a secret third thing - roommates
#sorry to be star wars posting on main but im star wars posting on main#i just think it would be so fucking funny#if they all get to thrawn and he & ezra are just chillin with space martinis#sabine: where's ezra 🔫>:(🔫#thrawn: literally just turn your head to the left#but fr though has anyone... Asked if thrawn wants to be Involved???#maybe hes done. maybe hes retired.#same with ezra#theyre busy stealing each others leftovers and fighting over the thermostat#whatever goes on in the galaxy is none of their business. they have Removed Themselves from the situation#i hope they Genuinely Dislike each other but theyre like... bonded like stray cats now#thats what trans-galactic purrgil travel does to a mf#ultimate roadtrip arc....#i hope it made them both simultaneously worse and better <3#i hope ezra does literally anything and thrawn is like 'this fucking kid... (derogatory. annoyed. tired. somehow emotionally attached)'#ahsoka and sabine turn up and thrawn is shoving ezra at them like Please Take Him Back Let Me Have Peace#while ezra is like 'awwww youd miss me too much (malicious. snarky. tired. somehow emotionally attached)'#of course its not gonna go like this. theyre gonna have thrawn be all like 'muahaha finally i have been rescued so that i may be eeeevilll'#not my thrawn but Whatever....#hes a bad bitch but let him be. let him slay in retirement#and ezra's gonna be this wise jedi sage who's unlocked the secrets of the force blah blah blah#not MY blueberry boy but Whatever....#i hope he's cloud-surfing with purrgil. living his best life#absolutely unprompted#ahsoka series#WAIT NO I WANT ONE OTHER THING#i need zeb & kallus to be gay married on lira san thankyew <3#(also for ahsoka's lekku/montrals to be longer but we all know thats not gonna happen....)#(every day i look at live-action shaak ti and sigh)#(at least we get a stellar loth cat animatronic instead of weird cgi <3)
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hi so. i might be not around for a bit; or like, posting inconsistently. idk
my partner and i broke up. i had to move back to my familys place. fuckin worst of all is that i had to leave behind my cats because my family has allergies. the stress of it all started a health flare.
its been. a very intense couple of days dkdhdkdjf
#im gonna live. ill be okay#im just. starting from absolute 0 it feels like#and my god i miss my cats so fucking bad
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SHUT THE FUCK UP MUSIC PLEASE. I DO NOT NEED TO THINK ABOUT THAT. PLEASE. NOT RIGHT NOW
#cat's rambles#neptune is complaining again#hey chat did she use me. she said she was planning to. but im not sure if she did#and we were equally bad for each other anyway so i shouldnt be too affected by this right.#i knew she was planning on using me i knew she would because i knew she was that type of person#well not at the start i dont think . i loved her at the start and maybe that was fucked of me idk#i do tend to like people who are bad for me (which i havent done in a while hip hip hooray)#but augh . was i using her. i mightve been i dont remember that time well#sighh i hate her i miss her i hate her i miss her i hate her i miss her i hate her i miss her#every time she texts me my heart shatters btw.#every time she texts me i respond as fast as i can because im still letting myself be at her every beck n call#chat i miss her so much i miss what we had. chat i hate her though i hate what we were#chat i miss her chat i dnt even care if she got worse. chat i dont care#id prefer her being worse than her being better because i want her to be bad for me so i can be bad for her#wow thats . a lil fucked up anyways#if you read all of this have a cookie ig
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Hanging out at the park with friends on a breezy summer day could fix me
#my joints hurt so so bad and my family isnt going to be home until tomorrow afternoon#and I miss my dog and my cat and the summer and doing sports and having close freinds#I miss playing minecraft on an xbox 360 and walking my brother home from school and having my mom brush my hair#I am filled with devastating amounts of grief over what has come to pass and what will never be#but alas. Its 1:30 am and I have school in the morning#no fr tho my joints and ribs hurt so fucking bad im gonna explode#save me minecraft ost. save me#rambles
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I’m always so fascinated by people’s bad roommate stories. I’m not sure I’ll ever live with someone I haven’t vetted extensively beforehand ever again
#every living situation where i’ve been assigned roommates randomly; i always seem to get one person who is an absolute angel#and 1-2 people who are honestly fucked up#i lived in halls 1 year of undergrad and everyone was kind of equally insane. honestly no one stood out as particularly bad#because everyone was just constantly screaming. i dealt with it by going home most weekends and getting noise cancelling headphones#3rd year of undergrad i lived in a suite which.. honestly was basically an apartment. had a living room/kitchenette; a toilet; a shower room#and 4 bedrooms#one of my roommates i’m still friends with to this day but honestly they were and are kind of a ridiculous person#like they were actively dealing drugs most of the year and their boyfriend was around most of the time and they would bone LOUDLY#and that’s the good roommate. so you can imagine the other two#one of the others.. honestly wasn’t a bad roommate; she was helpful and clean and civil#she was loud as hell though. she used to have attacks of insomnia and decide to rearrange her furniture at 3 in the morning#and we shared a wall. she also had an illegal pet rabbit.#our personalities just didn’t mesh well; like it became clear pretty fast that we were going to spend as little time together as possible#third roommate was loud; rude; annoying and gross. she’d be calling people at 7am just to yell down the phone to them about her problems#i was like who is picking up the phone to this bitch. she also picked up on my homosexual vibes in that way that homophobic straight girls#always seem to have; and was convinced i had a crush on her. and she bought a betta fish (allowed according to dorm rules) and then it died#because she didn’t want to take care of it properly. and she refused to do anything for herself#like she was always breaking shit and leaving it because she didn’t want to email or call maintenance. so then i’d have to do it#because it was always something we specifically shared. like a set of shelves she put a fucking 5lb shampoo bottle on. twice.#in grad school it was almost the same thing. one angel roommate who was kind of messy but otherwise fantastic#she rolled the best joints i have ever seen. and i still miss her cat cali#it was the men that were the problem. one was an international student who left after a month and bothered nobody#like to the point i didn’t notice when he moved out because he was so innocuous#the other two though….. so one of them started hooking up with my favourite roommate and immediately became SUPER annoying#the other one stole shit; left lights on all the time; left fridge and cupboard and freezer doors open; tried to guilt trip me#into giving him my weed; played mariah carey at 2am; never bought a single cleaning product or household item for the collective#unless you told him to…… he was even using my toothpaste at one point. like. sir.#oh and he was always dirtying other people’s dishes and cookware and leaving them in the sink for days. and leaving big chunks of food#in the sink. it was fucking gross#personal
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#ignore this one#this is just another vent#not one anyone should care about#........i miss her#i. ii hope i didn't fuck things up for her#....i miss her so so badly#...she might even see this. I....#...do i hope she does..?#....no because that's so very cruel#i hope she continues about things blissfully unaware of how much i miss her#how much i miss my-#...........hhhh.....#....if you do see this.... iim sorry#please don't feel bad#i. ii hope you're well. i hope the cats are lovely#i hope you're finding some kind of balance in your life#i hope i didn't screw everything up for you#....i shouldn't post this#.....i shouldn't even just for that small chance she sees it#......but i just....#......it was so sudden......left such a sharp void#.....i-i miss you#...i...i hope you're okay
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getting the kitkat in three days instead at the end of the week :)))))))
#feel like pure shit just want my baby boy back.#was not prepared for the timeline to accelerate like that#feeling wretched and guilty and upset also mostly the former three#not to act like a twelve year old unable to grasp the concept of death but i dont want some random ass cat i want my baby boy back#i miss this fucking idiot cat so bad i feel sick with it most days. i dont wanna put his things away it feel like a betrayal which obv#i know is stupid but still.#ill lovelovelovelove and miss and miss and miss u my whole life forever#sooooo not looking forward to the breakdown thats coming 🙃#ANYWAY.#kitkat
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Stupid period vent
If youre a cis man; kiss a uterous haver on the forehead today
Cus fuck this feels like a mental parasite
#:(#i hate getting my period :(#im so emotional#fuck a stupid tiktok has me hyperventalating over hpw i miss my mom and i was 4 again#my dad doesnt come home for another 3 hrs......#i need a hug so badly i wanna call him and ask him to come home but i shouldnt#.....fuck i think i might need to#i hate that i was literally fine until that stupid tiktok....#have you guys seen the cat Mao cartoons on tiktok? i always get sucked and forget theyre always emotional#this one was about a mom cat and a kitten and the mom cat died#i hate my mom and think she did horrendous things to me i shouldnt be screaming how much i miss her#fuck.#i dont wanna keep growing up and watching everyone die or leave#fuck im spiraling so bad#the safe thing might be to call my dad but i really really shouldnt make him leave work#i can never do the right thing im so fucking broken#i really need a hug and a joint#if i dont message you back im ok: i just feel very uncontrollable rn#going back n forth between anger and heartbreak#ALL OF THIS OVER A FUCKING TIKTOK#im so fucking stupid..#ill be okay i just hate being alone when im thinking about my mom/dark stuff#im not even sewerslidal im just extreamly emotional and its scaring me#if im not ok by 3pm ill call my dad#i feel nothing one minute and then i feel everything and rinse repeat#i just hate that i get triggered so easily#i already feel a lil calmer im just tired n need a hug#i know that im safe my body just physically does not feel safe#so im like trapped in my head#but if my dad was here hed be able to pull me out
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