#those holidays went too fast and I want at least one more week like that

[murobrown]

.

[shysuccubusstuff]

husband! Zayne:

Content: SFW + NSFW hc, non proof-reading; established relationship + husband! zayne + consensual + praise kink; soft! dom into mean! dom Zayne (then back to soft! dom) : brat taming + degradation kink + praise kink + overstimulation + aftercare.

Note: So, I entered the game today and Zayne blew up my phone, one of the texts was about kaomojis and he said something about it being childish, even if he did it afterwards... I NEED TO MAKE HIM A DADDDD so freaking bad!! I'm pretty sure I already did something like this, but I just can't help it when I see such husband material... BTW Tomorrow is my birthday!! Time goes so fast :00 I hope everyone is able to rest during the holidays!!

♡ thinking about husband! zayne...

Hubby! Zayne. who proposed during one of your many outings, the sun was setting and you were sharing those old fashion snacks, laughing about how he had gotten the smaller side of the ice cream. You were still making fun of him when he suddenly got on one knee, his face completely red as he tried his best to get his severely prepared and rehearsed speech ready.

Hubby! Zayne, who makes sure to celebrate each single month , all the people in the hospital are completely aware of when that time comes, as they are able to see Zayne's uncontrolable smile during the whole week before the date. He makes sure to buy a beautiful bouquet for you, only using your favourite flowers and colours, that's the least he would do for you though. When your aniversary comes, better get ready for Zayne's constant pampering, always reserving some special place where the two of you can go together and spend some time alone, just him and you.

Hubby! Zayne, who makes sure to pay close attention to every single word you say, always answering to your rantings: "Oh, really? How could she do that to his long time fwb? Keep telling me, love."

Hubby! Zayne who prepares dinner the days that he gets home sooner than you, the table set and ready by the time you arrive home, sometimes even lighting up a few candles to give it a more romantic ambience.

Hubby! Zayne who sometimes appear without warning, he is resting his back against his car. As soon as he sees you getting out of your work, he quickly gets up, his right hand holding a plasting bag. "Just remembered you wante to go to that new restaurant, since I had time, I went and bought some take-out, do you want to go home and eat it?"

Hubby! Zayne who gets flusthered as soon as you start to think about having kids with him. He had been thinking about it for a long time, trying his best not to say it in case you felt unsure about it.

Hubby! Zayne who goes crazy just from the thought of filling your precious cunt with his essence, forcing himself not to get carried away as he keeps hitting the tip of his cock against your cervix, your insides clamping against his length making his mind foggy. What if he simply shoved you into the bed as he took away that damn condom, filling you to the brim as he whispered sweet nothings into your ear.

Hubby! Zayne who loves cuddling with you every single night, his sligthly cooler body quickly warming him up, maybe a bit too much, as you suddenly start to feel something poking you from behind.

Hubby! Zayne, who tries to act as if nothing is happening, slowly moving away as soon as he believes you are asleep, his hand tracing down his own body as he tries to reduce his erection as fast as possible just so he can keep embracing your body... Or so he thought.

"Zayne?" Zayne stops himself, quickly hiding it under his pants.

"...Yes, love?" You turn around, soon noticing how he had gotten away from you.

"Sure you don't need some help down there?" Zayne's face flushes, his eyes widening as he looked at you.

"...You noticed?"

"I mean, it's not exactly easy to ignore something stiff poking against my ass while trying to fall asleep, you know?" Zayne stopped your words, his hand covering your mouth as he tried to stop you from saying more embarrasing things.

"I, I just didn't want to bother you, I know you work so hard everyday so you must rest, this can wait until we have more time, there's no need to--" Zayne's words were stopped as you got on top of him with your hands massaging his chest while you started a deep kiss. "Love... we shouldn't, we have to wake up early tomorrow." Once again, you ignored poor Zayne's words, your hands quickly getting rid of his shirt, throwing it to the ground, your lips starting to make a small trail of kisses all over his neck to his chest. "You're always so..." Zayne's words were cut off, a deep breath leaving his lips before he was able to end his sentence. "...naughty." You smiled, almost a bit too happy to see him struggling under you, sadly, this soon reached its end, with Zayne swiftly changing positions, having you under his bigger frame. "Not so fun now, am I right, love? It seems I have been pampering a bit too much, now you even think that you can do whatever you want and have no consequences since I love you so much... But even brats like you should know when to behave." Zayne started to kiss you, his soft lips leaving small kisses all over you as his hands started to run under your clothes, his cold touch making your whole body shiver. "Not so funny now, uh?" With your whole body now completely exposed to Zayne it was almost impossible to stop him from finding your sweet spots. Zayne started to massage your breasts, his fingertips playing with your nipples while he sometimes gave them small licks. "Oh, they are perking up, seems I am not the only one who is weak to... someone's touch."

"You're talking too much, just-- Fuck..." Once again, Zayne's touch stopped you mid-sentence, his hands suddenly lifting your lower half and putting your legs over his shoulders, Zayne now kissing and leaving small licks all over that place, still not going for it, just teasing it. "Zayne, just, uh... please."

"Please what, love? I can't read your mind, I need you to say it to me." You clenched your fists as Zayne kept teasing you by kissing your inner thighs.

"...Please. Just... just make me feel good, I need you." That was everything Zayne needed, his mouth already moving towards your cunt, his lips kissing it and giving it a few licks before he actually started to play with your poor clit, his tongue making your whole body quiver as he started to use one of his fingers to play with your clit as he used his tongue to slowly enter you. After a few minutes, he finally introduced one of his digits, entering another as he considered you were finally ready for it. "Zayne... I need you now-- Give it to me."

"Don't rush, my love. We have all the night left." With that set in mind, Zayne ignored your pleas, having you lay with your legs wide open as he kept teasing you, stopping just before you were finally able to cum, making your mind start to feel fuzzy as he kept playing with your clit, his fingers still prepping your poor cunt.

By the time Zayne finally let your legs go, your whole body was trembling, your eyes tearing up as the overstimulation had gotten far too much, your hands fisting the sheets as you tried to avoid being heard by your neighbours. "Zayne, Zayne, please!... Just, can't think, I need you." Zayne chuckled at your pouty face, kissing your lips before he lifted you from the bed, sitting on the bed and finally letting his cock make his way inside your overwhelmed cunt, bottoming out with a deep groan.

"...You feel so nice, love." You rested your hands on his chest, trying your best to use your legs to try and lift your lower half, barely being able to take out a bit of his lenght. "Wait dear, let me help my sweet girl." As soon as he said that, Zayne's hands were already on your hips, carefully lifting you up before entering your cunt once more, kissing you as he tried to avoid your slutty moans to be heard by someone that wasn't him. Annoyed by his teasing, you tried to get Zayne to move faster, trying your best to release his grip on you, suddenly forcing you to slam yourself against him, a high-pitched whimper resonating in the bedroom you both shared. " It seems I haven't been able to put you in your place still, I suppose you really want to be treated like a brat, get fucked against the mattress while you cream all over my dick, so be it. It was foolish of me to think you would want to get pregnant while making love, you just love getting your brains fucked out by me, right?" Zayne quickly pushed you again, forcing you to face the bed as he started to slam his hips against your ass, the lewd sound reverberating in the room while your eyes rolled to the back of your head. "Speak, you always love running your mouth, why not answer me now?" Your nails digged on the sheets, Zayne pulling you by your hair without much force, just letting you breath so you could answer him.

" Sowwy--- I'm sorry! Sorry for being a brat, I love you, I love you Zayne... I love getting my brain scattered by your cock! Pleasee~... Just cum inside, don't pull out, please please Zayne!" Zayne once again teased you, turning you around just to see the face he loved so much, ashamed, you hid your face with your hands, trying your best to keep quiet as Zayne kept punishing you with his thrusts, your cunt gushing out each time he hit that special spot inside of you.

"That's my good girl, keep taking me so good, dear. You're doing such a good job, let me get you all nice and round, you will make such a good mommy... Keep cumming for me love, no need to think about anything else." So you did, your cunt pulsating as your mind was finally able to begin to clear up, Zayne's hands caressing your soft face while he kissed your wet cheeks. "You did so well, love. Promise I will pamper you the whole week, how about having breakfast in bed? We can then have dinner together in that new restaurant you keep seeing, yeah? Let me take care of everything." Nodding, you dooze off, Zayne's words resonating in your ears while he kept kissing your face.

[keelt9]

BIGNONIA

Masterlist

That’s why I always like to have a plan B ready to be executed, most of the time. 

“Y/N.” I still heard my name in the distance. “Y/N!” All I had to do was speak, I know that. “SISTER!”

But I ran away.

“WHAT?” Collin raises his hands like he surrenders. 

“Jesus! I've been calling you for 3 minutes. Breakfast is ready.” He closed the door of my room, not before sticking his tongue out. 

I bluff, closing my eyes and scratching my forehead, looking at the calendar next to my bed; a week already.

In the kitchen mom is serving juice as dad is taking his coat, the cold wind of the morning is increasing. 

“Y/N, darling, do you mind…” I nod, Collin and I are in charge of the purchase for the game of this night.

“I got it.” She smiles, kissing my cheek, as Collin lifts his cheek for a kiss, but mom just smiles at him, patting his hand, laughing as she keeps walking.

“I hope when I come back on my first holiday I receive at least one kiss.” He screams giggling, taking the plates to the dining room. “You left two months, not a year.”

He left the plates and went to hug me tight, shaking me side to side. “But we missed you like hell.”

I giggle as I see the drops of jam now on the floor. “Ok, ok, you’re messing up my pancakes, move.”

Collin laughs as he kisses my cheek too. “You better text me like always, I’m a big guy now, but you're kind of special.”

My days passed like usual, just like I've been working all those years; from a distance, keeping updated Lilian, but in a few days we made so many changes.

Gael was in charge of the florist’s for a couple of days until Lilian contacted the woman she already had been talking to before I offered to go, and she agreed right away after all it only will be three weeks, until she goes back.

“Grandpa likes these ones, right?” I point the glass donut through the cristal.

“Yeah. I'll take two of them.” He pointed to the chocolate one. “Do you ever tell me?”

I lift my eyes from the counter. “Tell you what?”

Collin saved his phone in his pockets. “One week ago you were happily in the middle of a big game, then on Wednesday night, you arrived home with your bags.”

He remembered something before I spoke. ‘Ah! And with a squidward pumpkin in your hand, that is still in your room!”

The girl who is attend us gave me a box of donuts, I sigh and softly kicked him with my feet. 

“I arrived a couple of weeks earlier, GOD! Why must there be a reason behind that?” Collin takes the boxes of my hands, bluffing.

“Ok, you have that but, Y/N, you are terrified of seeing your phone.” He points to my back pocket. “It's been 10 minutes with the lighter on.”

I turn it off, just barely seeing in case I missed texts or calls from mom or Lilian.

“I'm not terrified, it's a detox.” Inside of the car Collin opens his eyes.

“Someone did something to you?! I'll ki…”I chuckled, grabbing his hand and calming down.

“NO! Collin your imagination, it's working too much.” I engine the car, if I want him to be calm I must give him something. “I need to be at home, and keep work kind of far away.”

Collin rolls his eyes. “Hey, take charge of something you didn’t even dream of and you'll be drained.”

“Are you sure?” I nod, stopping in the red light.

“I'm fine, give me a couple of days and I'll be me, one more time.”

After all, I didn't lie to him, just keep the truth short and concrete.

When we arrived home, dad and mom were laughing as they got inside of the house with dirtier clothes and bags of charcoal.

“You're fast.” Dad said getting inside.

Mom stops for a second at the door. “Honey, you have a package.” Collin points to himself. “No, my other honey.” 

I cleared my throat, winking at him, as he got inside with things we bought.

“It's in your room!” She screams as I get inside walking upstairs.

On my bed there is a small box; Lilian already told me she planned to send a small present, it could be useful for Collin in college.

“Where are the beers?” Collin asks on the frame door as I open the box without putting so much attention. We forgot the beer.

He reads my face like a book and giggles. “Let's go.” I put aside the package but he shakes his head 

“Don't worry I'll go with dad.” He said before going downstairs.

Where is the little kid who refuses to leave my room if there is a package on my bed? 

I look inside the box where there are a lot of yellow papers that cover another small box, inside of that a crystal ball, like the christmas one, just this one has a small bignonia inside of it.

A nice detail of Lilian.

I called her right away. “Hey, it’s beautiful, thank you so much, he will love it.”

“What?” I heard her excuse herself before the noise disappeared. 

“The crystal ball.” I giggle, repeating one more time.

“I don’t send anything.” I narrow my eyes, and see the andress on the box, yeah, the address is from the floristi’s. 

I tilt my head smiling. “Come on Lilian, the address is from the florist’s.”

Lilian stayed in silence for a couple of seconds. “Oh, it must be Gael, he asked me your address a couple days ago, he said a package arrived for you in the florist’s so he would send it to you.”

“Ok, am, I’ll call you back thanks.” I hang out quickly, but if my suspicions are correct that kid will be in trouble.

I move side to side from my bedroom waiting for Gael to pick up but it’s the second time he didn’t.

I sit on bed one more time watching the crystal ball and my phone at the same time, that brings me flashbacks of that day, one more time.

After Joe whispers, all fade away in a blink, I technically take my eyes off him and all the people surrounding me are already gone.

He tried to talk to me, but I feel so overwhelmed and observed that I panicked, I raise my hands every time he tried to approaches to me or speaks to me; when I recover the enough energy to make a movement I turn around as he keeps calling me, it only make it worse because as I tried to leave the stadium with a nothing more than Joe Burrow calling my name a lot of eyes were on us. 

Thankfully as we stepped outside of the stadium people who were there or passing by when they saw him, ran to him asking for a photo or autograph.

Inside of the cab, I realized that I didn’t know where I was supposed to go.

I found myself in front of Mr. McNeill house, in panic and a constant buzz of phone due to Joe calls and text, after acting in the worst way I could do it.

After a long talk and an endless cup of tea, Mr. McNeill words were enough for me to definitely run away.

<I told you my little girl, sometimes comes into our door.>

I called Lilian the next morning trying to explain something I didn't fully understand but as I told her I realized about my own feelings. 

I fell in love without doubt. The talks on the florist’s, the nights when even he looked tired he waited for me to close, the encouraging words and support when I was about to give up, the laughs, the details, it’s him being him.

I took the first flight to Carolina where Lilina was waiting for me, we explained to Gael something urgent came up and the instructions he must follow.

Like we expected, he called Lilian that Monday morning, Joe was at the florist’s and he said he needed to talk to me. Lilian took charge of that.

Just as Colline said, I arrived at my house on Wednesday night, defeated and embarrassed about my behavior. 

“Darling?” I didn’t even notice my mom. It's at the door looking at me with suspicious eyes. “Do you mind giving me a hand?” 

Shit, I shake my head trying to get rid of these toughs, as I stand at the door, mom stops me and caresses my hair.

“Everything is alright?” If I speak, she will know something is in my mind, I just assent. “Is that what are you waiting for?”

She sees the box over my bed. 

“Yeah, it could be.” Both of us smile going downstairs where in a couple of minutes my grandparents will come.

Gael answered me until Monday night, he said in his defense, <The poor boy looks so frustrated and overwhelmed.> How he can not do a few favors, besides Joe paid everything, he called it, a spare to a five star customer.

“Will you use your boxes?” Collin asked, looking at his phone with his test in his hands, he’s a genius in chemistry, and his A+ in his exam on his lap is just a small way of teasing me about how bad I was in that grade.

I just picked up Collin from school. “What boxes?” He's helping in a collection for Thanksgiving, I must say, he’s helping the girl he likes in her collection.

Collin bluffs. “Come on Y/N! You have a pile of small boxes in your room. It's a recycling collection, help you little brother a little bit.”

That’s the favors Gael refers to, every two days a same little box came from the florist’s, by the third box I refused to open it, in all of them a small crystal ball with that bignonia of different color.

“I thought mom gave you like 20 empty jars, two days ago.” I parked in front of our house.

I went back to my routine from work at home and helped mom with her small business of candles. 

“She did, and I already took them, but… it’s all for a good cause.” I laughed seeing my brother so nervous. 

I stop outside of the car, seeing him to the other side. “Why is it so hard to invite her on a date?” 

He fakes a big laugh. “You think I don’t think about it?”

“Well…” He lends his head on the top of the car.

“I tried, believe me, but it’s like when I see her all fade away. I can play cool, yes, but I’m literally fighting for not melting on the ground.” His words leave me thinking more than I would like. 

“I’ll empty it for you, can I give it to you tomorrow night?” Collin faces lights on and nods. 

That night after all were in their rooms, I put my 9 boxes on my bed. I take my time to open them one by one, like I suspect, each one has bignonia of different color all in a small crystal ball. 

“It will last at least two years, they are under a special process that makes them last.” That’s what Lilian told me, when I asked her how I was supposed to take care of them.

I grab one putting over my forehead, unintentionally shaking trying to put my thoughts in order, as I open my eyes, a soft light comes inside of it, I shake it one more time and turn it off.

He remembered, being alone in the dark makes me feel quite uneasy. 

“I’m crazy.” I whisper, opening my phone and his chat, which was archive.

And endless photographs of the most random things, like his morning milkshake disaster until a photo of the score of the game of last game, they won.

>I’m sorry, let’s talk about this face to face, ok? I’ll be in Cincinnati in a couple of weeks.

That’s all I could send that night, observing the crystal balls on my bed and the soft warm light that comes from them.

“She’s cute right?” Collin said with his eyes stuck to the window, a blonde girl who’s taking note of all the things they’re collecting is waving her hand to my brother.

I gave him the empty boxes the next morning and offered to take him to deliver it, and without saying give him a little push.

Or at least that’s what I tried because the girl took a step ahead, inviting him for a coffee. 

I didn’t even know since a month ago, he’s the main contributor of this collection.

I smile at the girl and my brother, what a scene. “Where do you collect that much?” 

Collin's face turns red. “Mom, dad, you, grandma and my friends.”

I laughed when the engine started; we must be home by dinner, with a happy Collin in the passenger seat.

“All I’m saying is he could find another way, that was so predictable.” It’s the third time Collin complained about the missing touchdown of the 49ers in the third quarter. 

“Collin, Purdy had like 5 big guys over him, how could he do that?”

As we enter the house, my dad finds us in the hallway with a smile that practically covers all his face. 

“You’re in trouble!” He grabs Collin by the shoulders as he points to the backyard.

I look at Collin who raised his shoulders. “Go!” Dad pushed me. 

I barely reached to avoid a crash with my mom who has a red face. 

“Do you kn…” She shook her head and pushed me to the backyard, didn’t even let me finish my question.

“You’re crazy people.” I shout as I practically sway in the door of the backyard. “There’s nothing here.” 

But I swallow my words when I see in our small “living room”, stand rubbing his hand on his tights to the guy I have treated awfully, Joe Burrow.

He only whispers, hi and it was enough for me to take a step back, one more time.

“Sorry, sorry, it's not you, believe me, it's not you.” I cover my eyes and take a deep breath.

“I'm sorry, I don't tell you anything, it's just… I thought in a thousand ways to tell you but… I simply couldn't do it.” I feel my heart squeeze and remember Collin's words.

“No please, no.” I look him into the eyes. “It's not you. I got through a lot of things in a couple of months that I never paid attention to my feelings, don't take me wrong, I'm so happy for Lilian but I was overwhelmed and well, an abrupt confession no confession took me out of balance.”

Joe closes his eyes and presses his lips together like he's preparing for the worst.

“So, all these weeks after treating you in the worst way I treat someone who's only nice with me, I take my time to realize my own feelings.”

By the time Joe opened his eyes I'm standing in front of him, making him blink.

“I like you too. I already told you, I'm not good with this but give time and who knows I could be pr…”

Joe kiss me.

He leaned on giving me a kiss that left me blank. A calming kiss.

Joe smirks and his rich boy laughs are slowly becoming my favorite sound.

“Whoa.” I nod slowly, pressing my hand against my lips.

I turn around, the living room is empty and knowing mom as I do, she probably has locked down Collin and dad in their room.

“I'm sorry, but I have to use my last 3 seconds of bravery.” Joe chuckled as he put his hands on his waist. “Y/N, I like you very much. Could you go on a date with me?” He gives me a towel. “I'd like to take things slowly but with you all can happen in a blink.”

I grab the towel and cover my face. “Is this one of the last time?” 

Joe nods. “You have to see it to understand.” I see a classic towel from a game, the logo of the NFL and the team. “To the other side.”

I turn it around and I see it, a small red heart. “I planned to speak with you and give you this but the guys understood I already talked with you; the talks in the locker room could be kind of messy.”

“Thank you, I feel worse now.” I joke, scrunching my nose, covering my face with the towel. 

“I mean, yeah, it would be nice if you wait but this is so much better.” I roll my eyes before seeing him one more time. “I was able to add some extra details.”

I choke my head. “Do you like flowers?” I giggle as I nod.

“Suits you one more time.” A bignonia represents tenacity and perseverance, things that scream Joe Burrow.

Lilian on multiple occasions told me about the feelings she had being with Jason, always resume in… <We create our own world just being next to each other.> I don’t know if this is what she means but right now it feels like that. 

With Joe eyes on me, I feel I could lose in the moment.

“My mom went crazy when she saw you right?” Joe giggles and bites his lips.

“A little bit.” He makes a funny gesture with his eyes, a sign that my mom probably freaks out.

“So, it’s my bye week, I'm hoping to relax and spend time with my girl.” 

I grip the towel tighter. “Your what? I’m sorry but I haven’t said yes.” 

Joe kissed me one more time. “Jesus and your three seconds of bravery.” It’s amusing.

One more kiss. “Ok, ok, ok.” And one more. “I’ll go!”

His idea of a date turns out in 4 days of dates; every time he comes to my house I bet Collin screamed deep inside as me the first time I met him.

Mom and dad act more comfortable by day two, at the end of the week they look more calm and cool around him.

And Sunday after watching the game where the 49ers will bring back the win against the Cardinals, my family is relaxed around him.

“Thanks for receiving me these days Mrs and Mr. Ivory.” Joe said to my mom. “I had wonderful days.”

“Please Joe, feel free to come anytime you want.” Mom smiled at him.

“Like he isn't in the middle of season.” Collin claimed, winning a small pinch of my mom. 

“Bring the container of the table Collin.” Dad giggles pushing him softly to the kitchen. 

“Thanks for coming Joe. I guess we'll see you next week; from far away, but see you.” Dad looks so excited.

I tilt my head. “What?”

“It's Thanksgiving. Joe…well, Bengals will come to play.” Collin said, giving the container to my mom. “Duh!”

“Right! I forgot.” Collin was about to keep mocking me but mom caught that tricky eye, taking a step ahead of him.

She gives the container to Joe. “I don’t know if you can eat more of this but I notice you like them very much.”

The container has her mini tarts, Joe ate a lot of them last night. “Have a good flight Joe.” Dad added shaking his hand too.

“Thanks Joe for the talk, it’s really helpful.” Collin has something to say for the way he sees me. “I bet that my sis…” 

Mom pulls Collin inside of the house with an apologetic smile rolling her eyes. “Take care Joe.”

I shake my head giggling. “I guess that means, I won’t have any chance to see you, right?” He said looking down the hill, my house is set in a classic hill with a lot of curves on the way.

“On the other hand, you probably will see me.” Joe opened his eyes. “Dad bought tickets for that game, a way of recreating old moments. He used to take Collin and me to Thanksgiving games, until we became older enough that our schedules didn't fit.”

“At least I see you there.” Joe clicks his tongue. “On the opposite team.”

I laughed, seeing his tricky eyes. “It’s a familiar lineage, sorry.”

“I know, I know.” He rolls his eyes, that gives me an idea.

I walk searching one of the small benches on the porch. “Wait a second.” I go up on it. 

“Do you mind giving me a hand? I feel like I'm going to fall.” I extend my hands.

Joe walked until I was standing with narrow eyes. “You’re strong, right?” He nodded with a curious smile on his face as I laid my hands on his shoulder. 

Even standing here, I’m 2 or 3 cm shorter than him.

I’m crazy, that’s what I am.

“Extend your arms.” This time he tilted his head with the same curious eyes. “Just do it.” 

Joe extends his arms, at that moment I jump right to his arms taking him by surprise but with a quick reaction he holds me as my legs surrender his torso grabbing me by my thighs.

“Unexpected.” Joe smiles as I feel my face heat. 

“It's a big hug for the trip and for the one I won’t give you next week.” I untangle my legs to get down but he easily puts it on around his torso, one more time. 

“Are you that sure that I won’t get a hug, huh?” Joe giggles. 

“You can put me down, it was a small thing I wanted to do.” But he didn't move, instead he kissed me, longer than usual.

“Yeah, this way you’ll probably need to lean down a little bit from the stands?” I look at him with open eyes. “What? Is a small thing I want to corroborate; the way I’ll kiss you after winning that game.”

I mumble a few words as he smiles at me. “Now you’re confident?”

Joe threw his head backwards laughing so hard. “I’ll be so damn near to perfection.”

“I hear a bet?” I said, faking an offended expression. 

“Let's bet.” Joe smirks. 

“You can put me down.” I untangle my legs but he refused to let me go. 

“It works for my curls, keep talking.” I laugh, putting my hands on his shoulders 

I look into his eyes. “Ok, let’s do it.”

[gt-daboss]

GT April Fools (1/2)

Warnings: Heavy Angst and Fearplay, Vore mention, Giants dehumanizing people

Next chapter

2300 words

“Are you sure she would like it?”

Melody asked, eyes locked onto her friend, yet not meeting her eyes, pointed ears shot straight up in anticipation. Well, she wouldn’t really consider Alex her friend, Melody struggled to make those, but she was the only person she could think to turn to for a situation like this. Alex, for her part, glared at her classmate.

“Hey, come on! I’m the expert with humans here, remember?” Alex scoffed, turning her nose up to Melody and purposely avoiding eye contact. Melody backed away, she DID want her help, so challenging her knowledge on a subject like this and making her angry was probably not the best idea. No, if she wanted her… the human to like her, then she would have to learn from Alex.

“No, no sorry I- I shouldn’t have questioned you, you're the expert after all, it- I mean I guess I just don’t understand how April Fools jokes work,”

Melody stated, messing with her hair subconsciously and averting her gaze to her hands. At this, Alex turned back to face Melody, smirking as if a new great idea just came to mind and she just couldn’t wait to share it.

“But if-”

“Listen if you want her to be your friend, then you gotta treat her equally.” Alex cut in, “Everyone messes with their friends, you can’t just leave her out of it, imagine if I left you out of my pranks?”

“Yeah, right” Melody responded, her frown widening. In truth, she hated Alex’s ‘pranks,’ which could be expected to be anything from ‘borrowing’ her food at lunch to more recent events like making fun of her short ears, an especially delicate topic for Taurs. Shaking her head to avoid another spiral, she focused once more on her friend. “I suppose I’ll give it a shot.”

“Alright! That's what I like to hear. Let me know how it goes, I might try it with my own humans as well, its their holiday after all.” she proclaimed, before quickly getting up and heading towards the door. “As much as it's a pleasure to talk humans with you, I’m hungry since somebody didn't share lunches today.” she teased with a wave before shutting the door leaving Melody alone with her thoughts.

With a sigh, Melody turned to her inner thoughts. Normally, she wouldn’t come to Alex for advice, but she was the only person Melody trusted for human expertise. Alex may have been kinda a jerk to her, but she was the only person outside of herself who had any experience with humans. Just thinking back to the time Alex brought one of her humans to school and showed them to her, she smiled softly just thinking about it. They were so cute!

Thinking back to her own situation, her human had barely talked to her yet, she wasn’t oblivious, she knew that she scared the human. Whenever she opened her mouth to speak and showed her teeth, or she moved just a little too fast, Evelyn would get the most horrid look in her eyes, like she was looking at a monster. Even just thinking about it made her sick to her stomach. She had to think of the positives, all the times when the human willingly went out to her, when she laughed at one of her jokes, when she let her touch her the first time. Just focus on the positives, and eventually, you will gain her trust, and maybe even… her friendship

***

Evelyn peeked out of the hole in the wall, her only safe space in the whole house. Seeing that the coast was clear, she stepped out into the open, out of safety. Today was a special day, at least, according to her Taur familiar, Melody. Over the past 3 weeks since the giant had first discovered that there was a human family living in the walls of her apartment, the two had grown closer and closer. Just a couple of days ago, the Taur revealed she had a surprise for the human, and while her parents had made it clear that they didn’t like her going out to meet with the Taur, they didn’t want to make her angry. She's already being generous not calling animal control on us... She would probably make a lot of money off it too…

No, she wasn't like that, she wouldn't sell her out to human control, or worse the farms… Melody had plenty of chances at this point, and while it wasn’t always clear what her intentions were, she had proven that at the very least she was the most trustworthy Taur she’d ever heard of this side of the border. Maybe instead of something mean, she had maybe gotten more human medicine for Mom. Yeah, that seems more like the Mel I know… Wait, Mel? Where did that come from…

*****

Slowly opening the door to not startle her human companion, Melody inched her way into the house and set her supplies down quietly. Peeking her head through the kitchen doorway, she spotted the small 5-inch Taur-like form briskly walking back and forth awaiting her arrival. She hadn’t even heard Melody come in, Taur being natural predators, and Melody was no exception. If a Taur did not want to be known by a human, there was almost nothing that one could do about it, usually resulting in the worst for the human.

Melody, for her credit, did her best to try and appear as small and non-threatening as possible, usually making sure to walk slowly but deliberately whenever she sensed the human in her presence. Though this is hardly a normal circumstance, what I’m about to do will definitely put me out of my comfort zone, I just hope Alex is right and she likes it,” she thought hopefully, subconsciously she was already imagining all the things that could go wrong. Just act like Alex, she has tons of friends and has been talking to humans for way longer than she had. Just don’t mess up, just don’t be weird, just don’t… 

She shook her head, all she was doing was just delaying the inevitable, taking a quiet but deep breath, she adjusted her hair and walked into view of her tiny friend.

*****

Being surprised when a Taur seemingly came out of nowhere always caused her stomach to drop to her feet. Regardless of if Melody meant to do it or not, any human that lived this side of the border knew that being caught without cover in front of a Taur was never good. It was hard to unlearn those feelings, these survival instincts, even if Melody had never done anything particularly scary besides being huge and kind of a clutz.

That's why when Evelyn suddenly appeared walking briskly toward her, she couldn’t help herself from taking a step back, much to the dismay of her large roommate.

“H-hey, hello! You came! I mean, you remembered! You remembered about today! I’m so glad you could make it.” Melody exclaimed in her softest voice, making sure that she remembered to keep her body in control. Making sure her hands were kept securely in sight and low, a small smile hiding her sharp canines dutifully behind her lips, and the hardest part: avoiding staring at Evelyn with her “hunter eyes” as she had called them.

Just stick with the plan, Just stick to the-

“Y-yeah, of course, I wouldn’t miss it no matter what. S-so… what kind of surprise do you have in store for me? All good things I assume?” Evelyn joked though she almost didn’t want to know the answer. Getting ready to bolt at the shortest notice, 

“I- I hope so. I mean I hope you will like it. If you don’t please tell me right away, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” Melody assured, I don’t want to scare off the closest person to a friend I have, just don’t. Mess. This. Up.

Listening to Melody’s cluttered speech from the kitchen counter, Evelyn sat. Even with the enormous size difference, there was just something so disarming about the giant. It almost seemed like she was more nervous of the human than vice versa. Standing there, shifting from one foot to another, fingers fidgeting with her mouth taut in a hopeful smile, Eve had begun to wonder if some of the stories of Taur cruelty had been overexaggerated. Meeting the kind Giant’s eyes she saw nothing in them that conveyed the brutality spoken of in legend, only a girl who wanted nervous about making a new friend. Is… is that what Melody thinks of me? A friend? 

Slowly she felt herself relax, this was Melody she was talking about. The same girl who left out small bits of food, the same girl who went out of her way to buy human medicine when her mother got sick. The same girl who kept her a secret from her roommate. The warm feeling of renewed confidence flew through her as she steeled her nerves and stepped forward towards the giant, to the openness of her kitchen counter.

“Of course, I mean, yes, I’ve been waiting all week for this surprise, It’d be pretty silly of me to not accept my host's gracious gift.” Evelyn joked, for the first time feeling something close to comfort in the presence of the Taur.

Unfortunately, the feeling was not to last. First, it started with Melody cracking her smile open just a little too wide, showing her canines. Then, within the same moment Eve had truly begun to trust Melody, the giant’s hand shot out in a sweeping motion across the kitchen table, with her in its trajectory. Evelyn's heart turned to ice and her muscles refused to move. The only thing she could do was stare, all the memories that the two had shared together flashing before her eyes. She barely even registered the giant, clammy hand scooping her up and restricting her, Melody’s claws mere inches away from her face. Had it all been a joke? Had this entire time just been the giant’s sick game? 

Melody please! Please put me down, I'm scared, I don't like this, please, PLEASE! She tried to voice, but her mouth wouldn’t respond.

Before she could even get a hold of her new surroundings, they were once again flipped on her head, literally. Now dangled upside down by her leg, Eve had a perfect view of her friend’s- no her captor's face, smiling wide lips parted slightly. Once again she tried to speak, but once again her voice failed her.

“You ready to become my meal.”

At this, she lost it.

Any hope of the Taur letting her go vanished, the sparks of friendship built within the last weeks were instantly erased. Tears began gushing down her cheeks blurring her vision, and with her body finally allowing her to take a breath, her senses returned and she screamed as loud as she possibly could.

“PLEASE please please don’t eat me! MOM, DAD! ANYONE! Please don’t let her eat me please. I don’t want to die! Melody I’m sorry Ple-”

Just as quickly as she was shoved into this situation, she was thrown out of it, literally. She felt a burst of movement as the hand that once restricted her flung towards the table dropping her there abruptly and scratching her leg in the process. She rolled a couple of times across the table before being able to orientate herself.

When she finally caught herself, she wasted no time looking back at the giant, bolting towards the uncovered electrical outlet as fast as her limp could carry her. Not caring about the trail of blood her trek created, she wildly scrambled through the outlet into the safety of the walls. Heart beating a mile a minute, the only thought that coursed through her mind was that she needed to run. She needed to get away from here. Get away from the predator just beyond the safety of the walls. 

****

When the words left Melody’s mouth she immediately knew she fucked up. Meeting the human's gaze and feeling her body go rigidly solid before tears started flowing from those beautiful crystal green eyes nearly broke her. But the scream that followed completely shattered her. 

The voice of complete fear and helplessness. That she felt like this was truly the end and that Melody was going to actually kill her and she needed to scream to her friend to-

Friend? I’m no friend to her. Not after that. She urgently needed to make this up, but the frog in her throat wouldn’t let her. 

And the begging that followed, how she pleaded for someone, anyone to help her. Her mom, her dad, anyone and anything that would protect her from Melody. She felt bile rise in her throat at the notion of anybody hurting Evelyn, and the fact that the theat was coming from herself…

Melody couldn’t take it anymore. She needed this to stop, her heart began to spiral and without thinking she got the human as far away from her as fast as she could. Even in this she failed as her quick movements caused her claws to cut the leg of the human girl.

As she watched the human hobble away, the stickly sweet smell of human blood wafted into her nose. She hated it. But seeing the human stumble and crawl into the outlet, she now lacked anything real to focus on besides the miniscule blood on her finger.

“Wait…” 

She tried to call out, but her voice came out like a whisper, never reaching the human limping through the walls. Even if it did, why would they stop? She lowered her hand, her face now turning blank. She felt like a zombie, completely zapped of energy, she had just lost the closest thing to a friend she ever had. 

Robotically, she made her way over to her room and shut herself in. Collapsing near immediately face first onto her bed, her outer emotions finally returned to her full force. She silently wept in solitude.

Unknown to her, however, was Evelyn, listening in through the walls.

Authors Note: Hey yall, this is my first GT story, so I hope you like it, sorry not sorry for the angst :P if you have any comments or questions feel free to go off as much as you want.

Next Chapter

[whentherewerebicycles]

processing some weight gain stuff under the cut

okay. in 18 weeks of pregnancy I have gained 15 pounds, which according to the guidelines I was given is a LOT more than I’m supposed to have gained at this stage. based on my starting weight I am only supposed to gain 15-25 lbs total across the entire pregnancy, which idk people seem to be mixed on whether that’s actually realistic but that is what the doctor says. in the last two weeks I went up 4 lbs, and that was with a terrible cold that totally killed my appetite and made it very easy to not indulge in holiday food (I couldn’t taste anything). I am exercising a little less (30-45 min daily walks instead of 45-75) but not like, SO much less yknow? and I have also been tracking my caloric intake on an app to make sure I’m not going over (although I think my real motivation there is if a doctor gives me a hard time about weight gain I’m going to be like yeah well here’s 15+ weeks of data on my eating habits so you tell ME what’s going on).

the point is that based on a calories in calories out model I shouldn’t be gaining this much weight this fast but I am. that’s just what seems to be happening! so I think I just have to LET GO and accept that my body is going to do whatever it thinks is best to support the pregnancy. I can still make good choices but I need to decouple the choices from the outcomes. or like, I need to accept that my good choices will produce good outcomes (I’ll be eating nourishing food and moving my body regularly!) but those outcomes will probably not include weight loss or a slowing of weight gain. here is what I will continue doing:

meal plan every week—I might want to start thinking about meal planning snacks too esp as I am feeling hungrier during the day

eat lots of fruits and vegetables every day

eat very limited amounts of processed foods and watch out for added sugars

walk briskly for 30-45 min a day

go to this hourlong weights class at least 2x a week (ideally 3x) and tack on 20-25 min of cardio on the bike after

I could also try going to the gym more often to do low-impact cardio—like trying to work in a couple days a week where I do 45 min on the elliptical while watching an episode of TV. I do find that in the past doing a lot of that mindless low effort activity seems to help with weight maintenance and is pretty easy to sustain because I’m just like, as long as I’m moving it counts! I don’t have to be pushing myself super hard! this is probably most doable for me on the weekends (and if I’m at the gym already it increases the chances that I might decide to run too).

ok so here’s a rough plan:

sat & sun: walk dogs (30-45 min x 2) + try to do 30 min x 2 of extra cardio while watching TV at the gym (or when liz is feeling better I can see if she wants to go together or do pregnancy workout videos)

mon & tues: weights class one of those days depending on work schedule + 20 min extra cardio one day + 30-45 min walk both days

wed: 30-45 min walk

thurs: this is my busy/long day with work stuff and rehearsal, but I can usually squeeze in a 20 min dog walk and could try parking far away and walking into work on days when it isn’t raining to get another 20+ min in

fri: weights class + 30-45 min walk

and I gotta remember I can make the walks less boring by 1) driving to a random neighborhood and walking from there and 2) talking to friends on the phone instead of just listening to stuff.

OKAY. the takeaway is: I DO NOT NEED TO FEEL GUILT OR SHAME ABOUT THE FACT THAT I AM PUTTING ON A LOT OF WEIGHT. I AM FOUR AND A HALF MONTHS PREGNANT! THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT MY BODY IS SUPPOSED TO BE DOING! I ALSO REFUSE TO LET DOCTORS OR THE INTERNET MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY ABOUT MY WEIGHT, BECAUSE I KNOW I AM MAKING HEALTHY CHOICES THAT ARE GOOD FOR MY BODY, MY BABY, AND MY MENTAL HEALTH. I ALSO WANT TO GENTLY DECOUPLE GOOD/HEALTHY CHOICES FROM SPECIFIC OUTCOMES. EATING WELL AND STAYING ACTIVE THROUGH MY PREGNANCY MAY NOT KEEP ME FROM GAINING “EXCESS” WEIGHT. BUT IT WILL MAKE ME FEEL BETTER IN MY BODY/SELF. IT WILL ENSURE THAT MY BABY IS GETTING LOTS OF GOOD NUTRIENTS. IT WILL HELP ME SLEEP BETTER AND FOCUS MORE AT WORK. IT WILL HOPEFULLY MAKE LABOR AND RECOVERY A LITTLE BIT EASIER TOO! I AM DOING ALL THE RIGHT THINGS AND IT IS OKAY THAT MY BODY IS NOT CONFORMING TO THE PRESCRIBED NORM. I TRUST MY BODY AND ASSUME IT HAS ITS REASONS!!!!!!!!!!!

[olddirtybadfic]

Holiday Half Arse: Nyarth Nativity (part two of two)

Twelve!me should not be trusted to plan a Christmas dinner or name mpreg kittens.

Part one is here.

Content Warning: First-person mixed points-of-view; Pokémon/Human romantic relationship; mpreg; absolute character assassination of Jessie (she’s super violent towards Meowth and pregnant James); very shaky understanding of psychological issues and mental institutions; James, Meowth, and their kitten eat the placenta

-O-o-O-o-O-

(Meowth's point of view)

Before we knew it, it was the middle of December. James had gotten pregnant in October, so the ninth week was getting closer.

One day we were sitting in the living room, watching TV. Actually, I was sitting, bored at all the corny Christmas commercials and James was lying down, half-asleep. The couch wasn't the most comfortable place to fall asleep, but I couldn't blame James for not being fully awake. All those commercials were so cheesy and boring.

A commercial came on. I thought James would be falling asleep, but it was a telephone commercial. It was about a couple who couldn't be together for Christmas. They decided if they couldn't be together, they should at least call collect so they save money.

To my surprise, James burst into tears.

"That commercial was so sad. We're lucky we can be together for the holidays," he said.

"We can be together every day," I said. I hugged James. He hugged me too. He winced.

"Did my claws come out?" I asked.

"No. The kitten just kicked," James said.

James was a little round. The kitten would come any day. I wasn't sure if I could call James's Team Rocket uniform a maternity outfit.

I did learn that the kitten moved more whenever James ate anything sweet.

It seemed like the kitten could come out in the eighth week.

-O-o-O-

On Christmas Eve, James seemed to be really enthusiastic about having the kitten near Christmas.

He went into the bedroom to take a nap. A few minutes later, I heard James call me. He was breathing hard.

"I….I think it's time," he panted.

James pushed while I caught the kitten as it came out. One final push popped out the kitten.

The kitten was okay, of course. James was also okay. He still hurt a little, but he was okay.

"It's beautiful," James breathed.

"Just like you," I said. Then I bit off the kitten's umbilical cord.

The kitten opened its eyes. It had emerald green eyes like James.

James smiled at me. "It's a girl," he said.

"What's her name?" I asked. James was sure to come up with a meaningful name.

"Her name is Jessowth," James said. He started to breastfeed the kitten.

"Jessowth. Interesting name," I said.

The next day, on Christmas, James and I were happy to cuddle up in front of the TV with our daughter. We decided to have the placenta for our Christmas dinner that night.

"I guess we can't have sex tonight," James said.

"Oh, don't worry. The kitten and your love makes up for it," I said.

James began to cry.

"I'm sorry. That was just so sweet. You….You know I really love you, don't you?" James said.

"Yes. And I love you too," I said. "And anyway, you have to wait four or five weeks. You don't want to strain yourself."

James smiled. "You're the doctor."

(James's point of view)

Our little kitten seemed to grow so fast in just five weeks.

Jessie wasn't yet out of the mental institution. I was a little glad. A violent person shouldn't be around a newborn kitten.

After about ten weeks, I began getting sick again: eating a lot and vomiting. And I was craving foods I didn't normally eat.

After three hours of that, I just got out the Pokémon pregnancy test. A few minutes later, Meowth came into the bathroom.

"Are you okay, James? You look flushed," he said.

"Meowth, I'm pregnant again," I said.

"Another kitten?! Wow, you're producing a lot of kittens," Meowth said.

"It's just one," I said.

"Well, we're raising one kitten. We can raise another one," Meowth said.

Meowth was actually little more than a kitten himself. He was an adult (if he was human, he would be only slightly older than my eighteen years), but he hadn't evolved into a Persian (and he didn't plan to). One could say I was having kittens for a kitten.

Both Meowth and Jessowth are my kittens to watch over, care for, and protect.

Epilogue (Meowth's point of view)

Jessie eventually came home from the mental institution. She and James are friends again.

Jessowth is talking. She sounds like a female version of me.

Jessowth seems to be kind of wary of Jessie. Maybe she knew Jessie abused James when he was still pregnant with her.

James is delighted to be having another kitten. He's pretty far along.

We're all one big happy Team Rocket.

-O-o-O-o-O-

Moral of the story: Maybe don't name your newborn kitten after your formerly abusive friend, no matter how much she's improved. Also: tired of that boring bird for Christmas dinner? Try placenta!

[anthonysstupiddailyblog]

Anthony's Stupid Daily Blog (721): Fri 8th Mar 2024

I remembered being cast as one of the ugly sisters in the school pantomime of Cinderella when I was at school and I wondered if you could still have ugly sisters in Cinderella based productions today or if the PC brigade would intervene and insist that you rename them the "Not Conventionally Attractive Sisters". Quite worryingly the PE teacher in charge of the costumes during that production went to the head teacher and told he he was struggling to come up with ideas for out costumes that would make us look ugly. The headteacher asked him what he found repulsive in children and he replied "pubes" and sure enough the lightning fast intense background check the headteacher performed revealed that this PE teacher shouldn't have been allowed within one hundred feet of a school much less employed by one. I used my emergency holiday to finish early so that I could go to the town for my next laser removal session. I've been coming here every six weeks for almost a year now in order to get this hideous black star removed so I can replace it with a portrait of Jim Morrison and it's still barely faded. I think it will still be at least another year until it's completely gone, unless I fall off my motorbike with my shirt off and happen to land on my upper right arm and the friction peels the image off completely. It'll be even more convenient if the scar that it leaves when it heals looks exactly like Jim Morrison because then I won't need to get the tattoo. The laser still hurt like a bitch even with the machine that blows cool air onto the area while the artist is working but at least it only lasts a minute or so. While I was there I decided to book in another tattoo session as I’ve long wanted an image of my dog Lucy dressed up as The Green Lantern etched onto me. There was a slot available next Tuesday so I booked in a session and I can not wait. Even though I was keen for 2024 to be the year that I got absolutely smothered in tattoos I think this Lucy ink will probably be my last tattoo for a while since I have a holiday to Greece with the family to pay for so It'll probably be wise to knock these on the head to start saving up the spending money. Having said that the last I heard the Greeks are pretty much flat broke so maybe if I take all my tattoo designs with me then I might be able to get them all inked on me for pennies. There was a news story about an AI robot built in Saudi Arabia that "groped" a reporter on live TV. In the footage the robot puts it's hand out and pats the reporter on the arse. Looking at this news story made me think maybe that teacher at my primary school might have been a robot. If this had happened to me I would have done an interview with the press afterwards claiming that reporter has claimed that this experience has left her unable to work, dealing with post traumatic stress disorder and unable to enjoy Robocop anymore. I imagine the robot's lawyer has claimed that the cable to charge the robot is actually in the palm of it's hand and the robot thought that the reporter's arse crease was the plug socket. Imagine if all the robots suddenly got a lust for sex with humans and started hunting us down for an orgy of robotic rape. The only way out would be for all the humans to dress up like robots and then just wait it out until the actual robots ran out of charge. This would be problematic too as the real robots would see us in our robot costumes wandering around acting normal and would wonder "why are those robots not looking for humans to bugger?" so to combat this we'd have to accompany all our movements with chants of "must…rape…humans".

[burninlovebutler]

20 - I Know You're Lying // Forever Winter // a.b x oc

warnings: mentions of drugs, sad/high!austin, cursing, mainly dialogue, kinda short, 18+ always, minors dni

20/?: Elsie shows up unannounced and suspects Austin of lying, then asks him to compromise for the sake of the coming holiday.

see masterlist/summary for background info + chapter log

Now I need your help with everything that I do I don't want to lie, I've been relying on you

I hope I don't murder me I hope I don't burden you

-AUSTIN-

I laid on my couch, every limb glued to the dark blue suede. It felt like heaven, a soft velvety heaven. The concrete hues and patterns of my ceiling blended into something so consuming. Plaster swirls spun around each other in a fluid dance, eyes following every twirl. Nothing else on my mind besides that beautiful cement performance.

An abrupt buzz rattled against the glass coffee table, yanking me from my riveting entertainment. It took a full ring and midway through another for me to finally reach my phone, turning it over to see Elsie’s name on my screen. A lazy smile tugged at my lips.

“Hello,” Answering, though it sounded significantly more excited in my head.

“Austin, what the fuck are you doing?” She asked sounding urgent, annoyed?

“What do you mean?” Just speaking felt like the most exhausting endeavor. “I’m, talking to you.”

“Austin, I’ve been knocking at your door for the past 20 minutes.”

“What? I think you’re mistaken Els. I’ve been home all day.”

“I know.” I never knew a knock could sound so annoyed until her fist met my door again.

“Oh, sorry I um, hold on.” Every muscle worked overtime to stand me upright.

The line went dead.

I heaved open the heavy metal door and propped myself against it, stumbling a bit when it swung back. “Sorry, I um- I must’ve fell asleep.”

She stepped forward cautiously, her eyes inspected me. Like she was a scientist, and I was the petri dish. “Right.” Stepping past me and into my apartment. “Is this why you haven’t answered any of my calls for the past week?”

“Els, I’ve been busy okay.” I precariously closed the heavy door behind me as if I moved too fast it would fall apart. “Listen, I can’t have you here right now. I’m doing a lot of work.” My immediate excitement of her visit quickly disappeared.

Her brows knit together as she stepped towards once again. I tried to divert my eyes from her this time. “Okay, you’re kinda freaking me out and I don’t appreciate you just showing up and– “ Lifting herself to her tippy toes, her index and thumb prying my eye open.

I immediately jerked back, “The fuck are you doing?”

“Are you fucking high?”

“What the fuck are you talking about, of course I’m not high.” Though, my snail slow speech begged to differ.

“You’re lying to me.”

“I’m not.”

“Your eyes are fucking red, you’re high.”

“I’m not fucking high, Elsie.”

“Yes, you are, I know you like the back of my fucking hand Austin. You’re high.”

I hated seeing her like that, seeing her look at me like that. I knew she was concerned, angry even, but mostly it was sadness hidden in her voice. That one was the dagger. It was part of package deal though, wasn’t it? Addiction and disappointment, one and the same. You can’t really have one without the other. An unfortunate byproduct but it was one I, at least, attempted to limit from her.

I’ve tried being honest about relapses before, but it only made things worse, complicated. It was the biggest fucking mistake because now under any slight suspicion she’d be up my ass, watching me like a hawk. The Nox sighting shit from last week was a mistake too, yet another thing I had to hide. Anything slightly strange I saw or heard, I had to assume it was just my head, even if it looked or felt real. The problem though was that those lines were beginning to blur.

“Fine, fine. Yeah.” I admitted. “I just smoked, it’s not a big deal.”

What I hated even more than seeing her look at me like that, was lying to her.

“It doesn’t smell like weed in here.”

“I blew it out the window.”

“Show me the bowl.” She crossed her arms and popped out a hip.

“You know, I don’t really appreciate you coming in here and accusing me of shit.” I snapped back.

“Show me the bowl.” Her eyes narrowed in on me.

“I don’t have to answer to you Elsie. I’m not a child.”

“Show me the bowl.” Her voice stern and filtered through grinded teeth.

“Fine. You wanna see the bowl? I’ll show you the fucking bowl.”

I rashly made a b-line to my bedroom. Luckily, I had been smoking, so this shouldn’t be a hard sell. I did however take the pill bottles scattered on my nightstand and shoved them back into my drawer.

I carried the once clear blue pipe out to her. It had been packed and half smoked. “See, weed.” And dropped the piece in her hands. “Are you fucking happy now?”

Misty green eyes studied me intently, still like I was a science experiment. I was too high to decipher if she was buying it or not. Knowing Elsie, she wasn’t convinced. But right now, she had no proof of anything else. The exact proof she was looking for was in her hands.

“If it was just weed then why did you lie to me about it?” Her tone softer now, delicate.

I anchored myself once again to the same spot on the couch. Taming my high for this interaction was taking every last bit of effort in me. The cloud-like sofa enveloped me in the softest hug. Xanax made everything feel light, fluffy, happy – until someone tries to rip you out of it. I was either a giddy fool or a raging asshole. And right now, I was really wishing she’d fucking leave so I could get back to the dancing plaster on my ceiling. It had become my top priority.

I wouldn’t be so fucking annoyed if I could just have her sit next to me and watch the show above us. That was the most fucked up part, I wanted her to join me. I wanted company as corrupt as me. I wanted someone who understood the concrete ceiling performance, someone just as fucked up. But she’d never do that, she was too good. And in my heart, I knew it wasn’t right, I’d never want anyone to deal with this fucked up burden of mine. Especially not her.

“I don’t know, you just get so fucking worried about everything.” Dropping my hands in defeat then bringing one to my temple.

“Yes, because you fucking worry me. Because you were just at my house-”

“Elsie. It’s just fucking pot calm the fuck down.”

“You know it doesn’t work like that for you.”

I rolled my eyes at her words. But she was right. Since my ‘break’ (at least that’s what everyone simmered it down to), in college, me and marijuana didn’t mix well anymore. At least not most strains, for it to be helpful I needed very specific types. Which kinda took the fun out of it since it was a lot of trial and error.

“It’s a good strain. It helps me.” Although I could act, lying in real life was difficult. You know how people say that if you can lie well, you’re a good actor? Not always true.

At least not with me, not with her.

Or maybe I just was a shitty actor after all.

“Mhm.” She hummed, then sat next to me, twisting to face me.

“How’ve you been since-“

“I’m fine, I don’t wanna talk about it.” Filling in the blanks for her before she could even prompt them.

“You can tell me if something is going on, you know that right?” She spoke in the sweetest tone, one that could rot your teeth right out of your skull. I couldn’t go to her, not this time. She went to reach for my hand, but I drew away.

“Els, there’s nothing fucking going on. I’m fine. Can we just drop it?”

I just wanna get back to my stupid fucking ceiling show.

Her pink lips pressed together staying quiet and focusing her fumbling thumbs. “Anyway um… I um,” She tucked a chestnut wave behind her ear, then twirled a freshly manicured finger around the lock. “Don’t be mad.”

I knitted eyebrows together looking over at her, my dazed mind trying to think of what she could possibly have to tell me that would make me mad. Madder than her accusing me of shit.

“Do you think um… Do you think you’d be open to spending Christmas with me and Nox?” Her expression held an air of telling your parents you did something bad, like she was bracing herself for impact. No doubt a result of whatever Nox puts her through.

Suddenly I was coming down from my high and I was coming down quick. “Why the fuck would I want to have Christmas with him?”

“Well… I want to spend Christmas with you, but also with him so…” She trailed off.

“So, you’re forcing us to interact for you?” Propping up an accusatory eyebrow.

“Well, uh,” She pressed her lips together again, “He wants to apologize.”

“Apologize?” I snorted, “Elsie he fucking held me against a fridge and then punched me.”

“Only after you punched him first.” She countered.

“Yeah, he fucking had you by the fucking throat. You’ve got to be shitting me right now.”

“Well, I just think… you could apologize too you know?”

I scoffed, “Oh that’s fuckin rich.”

“Aust please, I just want you guys to get along.” Pleading once more.

“I’m not fucking apologizing to him, he’s a fucking prick. He deserved it.”

She drew her fidgeting hands into her lap.

“Listen, I don’t know what kind of twisted manipulation bullshit he has you brainwashed with but I'm not doing it.” The words left my mouth before I got a chance to filter them. It was hard to control my moods or my words when I’m strung out, none the less when I was coming down.

The light in her sage eyes faltered when she heard my reply. Pausing before speaking again and dropped her focus back down to her hands. “He’s better now. I promise. He hasn’t been drinking as much. He only gets like that when he’s drunk.”

I knew that was a lie. She didn’t need to be a bad liar for me to know that. Any person with two fucking eyes would know that was a lie.

“Aus, please?”

She leaned heavy on the nicknames when she wanted something. Truthfully, I used to hate any shortened versions of my name. But she made them sound like the best titles you could ever be called. She had to know that they tugged at me because I’d give in to her every time.

As much as I didn’t wanna fucking have a group Christmas with the Grinch himself, if I did give in to her this time - It would distract her from the microscope she had me under and buy me some time while I got back on track. I could handle it myself and she never had to know. She wouldn’t bother me, and I wouldn’t burden her.

“Please Austie? It would mean a lot to me. If it doesn’t go well then… then you never have to come over when he’s there ever again. I promise.”

Plus, who the fuck am I going to spend Christmas with besides her?

I sighed, “Fine.”

“Yay!” She clapped excitedly, bouncing on the couch before tackling me in a hug, “Thank you!”

“No problem.” I grumbled under my breath.

She retracted carefully, “Hey what you got goin’ on today? I’m taking a break from work so, we could go do something?”

“Well I-“ My mind felt like it was buffering, no words seemed to come out no matter how hard I tried.

“It’s a warmer day today, we could take the ferry to Coney?” She suggested.

“Coney Island? In the middle of winter?”

“It didn’t snow today, well at least not a lot.”

“You’re insane.”

“C’mooon it’ll be so fun, we can lay on the beach. Just wear a heavier jacket or something.” She pressed further. 

“The beach! You’ve really lost it. Plus the tourists I-”

“It’s winter! You know Coney is dead out of season.” Practically singing the persuasion.

“Augh, fine.” I gave in, like I always fucking do.

Next Chapter: 21 - Blue M&Ms

As always thank you for any like, comment or reblog. It truly means the world to me - I love seeing others enjoying my lil story & I hearing your thoughts <3

p.s. this chp & the next are the calm before the storm :) lmao

[scarlettriot]

Along for the Ride PT 1

Pairing: KirishimaxF!Reader

Summary: A drunken mistake had you marking the little Plus One box to your snobby cousin's wedding. Kirishima told you not to worry, if you couldn't find a date, he'd go with you. When the wedding gets moved up, there's absolutely no time to find a date and you're now about to be traveling to America with Kirishima on a private jet no less, dreading having him meet your rude and impossibly arrogant family.

Contains: Kirishima and Reader both come from very well-off families. Plus-Sized Reader. Fluff. Hurt/Comfort.

Warnings: Kinda smutty for a minute. Minors DNI. Drunken Sex. TW: Manipulative Family Relationships. TW: Body Image Issues

A/N: This story has been rolling around in my head for a while now. I might rewrite this and repost. Or I might just post the whole thing soon. I dunno yet. It does get smuttier.

Word Count: 4,974

"What's up with Y/N?"

Eijiro stepped out of the locker room with a towel slung over his shoulder and made his way into the kitchenette where Mina was chugging a bottle of water before getting back to her patrol. His eyes were trained on their mutual friend out on the patio, pacing.

You had your phone pressed to your ear, the high neck of your hero costume unzipped to your collarbone and he noticed your gloves discarded on a chair.

"No clue." Mina shrugged. "She got back from patrol and she noticed a bunch of missed calls from her mom. She's been out there, flailing on the phone for the last fifteen minutes now."

The three of you had met in your second year at UA when you transferred into their class and were quickly accepted by their little squad of friends. You were a bit quiet at first but quickly found comfort in the group. Eijiro had grown especially close to you when you both interned with Fat Gum.

Late nights traveling on the train back to school, a few close calls while helping patrol, and days spent playing cards while you both healed up in the hospital left plenty of time for Eijiro to get to know you better than most. It was how he knew you had a pretty bad relationship with your family, why you hated returning home for the holidays almost as much as you hated any and all forms of tomatoes.

He considered going out there just to see if there was anything he could do but before he had the chance, you were sliding the glass door open. "Oh, good, you're back." He offered you a bottle of water for your throat that he assumed was sore after that argument. "I- um- can I borrow you for a second? Alone?"

Mina snorted a laugh. "If you guys wanna bang it out on the counter you can just say so. I gotta go to work anyways."

Eijiro threw the towel at her as she left the room leaving you two alone. "What's goin' on?"

You hoisted yourself up on the countertop while he leaned against the fridge. "You remember my cousin's wedding that's happening this winter?"

He nodded. He vividly remembered the both of you getting waste a few weeks ago when you were filling out the RSVP and accidentally marking 'plus one'. Then you ran around trying to find White Out but he'd told you if you didn't find a date or have a significant other by the time of the wedding, he'd just go with you.

You argued that your family was bat shit crazy, had more money than they could spend in their lifetime and because of that, they were among some of the rudest people you knew, and you didn't want Eijiro or anyone else around that.

The thing was, Eijiro already knew that and was still okay with going. He came from money too. A lot of it. His family was just more welcoming than yours, the wealth never really going to their heads. But, he reminded you that he'd ran into enough people like those in your family that he knew how to handle them. You finally agreed to let him accompany you, leaving the plus one box checked but the name line blank.

"Well, my cousin just found out that surprise, she's pregnant! And, obviously, she can't have a wedding while seven months along so they've decided to move the wedding up to this weekend."

He nearly choked on his own spit. "This weekend? As in four days from now?"

"Yup! Saturday at 4 in the evening. Oh! No one's supposed to know she's pregnant either. So, I'm just supposed to compliment her on how flattering her dress looks, how thin she is," Your hands strangled the water bottle between them, "And I have to find something flattering to my figure because my mother has seen me in my hero outfit and she's so glad I wear a mask because if anyone knew her daughter ran around looking like I do, well, it'd ruin her!"

You massaged your temples circling back to the actual point, "Anyways, I just wanted to bitch for a sec and let you know you're off the hook since four days is just a little short notice and I told her my plus one wouldn't be able to get the time off that fast."

He pushed off the fridge. "Well, wait, hang on! I'm not letting you go in alone to deal with them! Hell no! You need backup!" You looked almost taken aback by his abruptness, "Yeah. I can work this out. Is the wedding at the same place it was supposed to be or has it moved?"

"No, it's still that fancy lodge in California. I was planning on leaving Friday morning and then coming back either Sunday night or Monday morning since my mother insists I go to their brunch the following day. But, Eijiro, I already have this weekend off..."

"Denki owes me a favor or twelve. He's supposed to be off this weekend too, I'll just see if he can cover me."

"And if he can't?"

"Then..." He pressed the back of his hand to his forehead, "Y/N, am I feeling warm to you? I think I might be starting a fever!"

You folded your arms, shaking your head, "Thought you said lying isn't manly."

"Technically, correct. But, what would be real unmanly is for me to let you deal with your family's bullshit all alone." You watched him closely, "To be honest, I'm sure we could just explain you had a family thing come up and asked me to come along for moral support. I don't really think anyone would think twice about it. Hell, you took a few days off to console me when my turtle died suddenly!"

"Eiji, you refused to eat."

"And you brought me my favorite dumplings! Same thing!"

You might have shaken your head at him but your arms opened wide. The telltale sign you wanted affection. He walked forward, consuming you in a tight hug. Your arms latched around his neck, face buried in the hollow of his throat. "You're the best."

"I just do what I can."

>>><<<

You should have canceled. Instead of Eijiro faking sick to get out of work, you should have faked it with your mother so you didn't have to go in the first place. You crumpled to the floor of your bedroom in pure frustration amidst the twenty or so outfits and dozen pairs of shoes you'd thrown out of your closet trying to find something that your mother would deem appropriate.

It wasn't your fault you had a fuller figure. You worked out, ate right, not to mention your job kept you very active, and yet your, hips, ass, and breasts were by no means subtle.

Your mother had also insisted on the dress being floor-length and modern, "Do try not wearing all black. It's a wedding, not a funeral. And, get your hair looking natural, please." And, just like that, 70% of your wardrobe was out the window!

"It's open!" You called from the floor when the doorbell rang.

"You really should lock this." Mina tutted, walking through the door with a bag full of takeout.

"I do. At night."

"Honey, it's 9 PM."

"Night like bedtime."

Mina just rolled her eyes and walked into your tiny kitchen. "I see the dress hunt is going well."

"I actually figured it out!" You got off the floor, careful not to step on a heel as you made your way to the pink haired woman, "I'm just gonna go in my birthday suit. I figured, my mother made my body technically therefore she can't disapprove of it. Because, you know, she's never done anything wrong in her life!"

Your best friend snorted out a laugh and passed you the take-out container stuffed full of stir fry. "you're a wonderful person, you know that?" You loved the fact Mina didn't even have to ask what you wanted.

"If you'd just move closer to work then you could pick it up yourself and I wouldn't have to bring it to you."

"Too expensive." You declared after a mouthful. "You pay almost twice as much as I do per month and I just don't see the point. I have damn near the same amount of space you do for half the cost!"

You adored your small one-bedroom apartment. It was perfect. Right above a bakery that you visited each morning after your run and a little balcony that provided you with the most stunning view of the sunset.

"You and Kiri, I swear." Mina just shook her head and curled up with her food on the loveseat. "I thought he'd end up with the biggest house out of us all the moment we started making that real Pro money. You've seen his parent's house. It's massive! You could get lost in that place!"

Eijiro's place was barely bigger than your own. He lived in the same condo he had since you'd graduated UA, claiming it was perfect for him in each and every way. But, you knew that he donated a sizable amount of his paycheck every month to charities, the same as you. With savings to spare, neither of you saw the point in hoarding it and therefore the small condo was all he could afford with what he actually kept.

"Just don't understand how a guy that big can live in such a tiny little space. At least with you, it's you know, physically feasible."

Eijiro's bedroom was barely large enough to fit the king-sized bed the man needed to sleep comfortably and even then, his feet were dangerously close to dangling off the bed. And, as if the man's ears were burning, your cell phone went off under a pile of discarded shoes.

Shark-E: Figured out your dress situation? If not, I'm just gonna pack like ten different ties and hope for the best.

You: Yeah! I totally did! I'm just gonna wear this birthday suit I got and call it a night.

You chuckled at your own joke all over again. Watching the grey ellipses appear and then vanish, appear and vanish again. After a third time, you took pity on the man.

You: Joking, Ei. I still don't have it figured out but Mina's over so, hopefully, she can help.

Shark-E: Gonna give me a damn heart attack! Seriously, I wouldn't put it past you just to see the look on your mom's face. Tell Mina hi and good luck to you. I vote the dress from the Hero Gala two years ago.

You: Hi from Mina. Can't. Too much boobs.

Shark-E: You take that back right now! There is NEVER such a thing as too much boobs!

You chuckled to yourself, putting your phone down, and then finished off the last of your delicious dinner, thinking about the dress Eijiro mentioned.

You wondered if maybe there was a way you could make the thing work but it was so very low cut. So much tape had been used to make sure no slips happened but damn was it worth it! The beaded bodice with the sparkling long sleeves, gods, how you loved that dress.

"I'm inclined to agree with our shark boy. You're busty, who gives a damn. You looked hot as hell in that dress."

"My mother, that's who. As much as I'd like to not give a flying fuck what she thinks, for some dumb reason, I do. On top of her telling me that the amount of cleavage I would show would be vastly inappropriate for a wedding, she'd also say the way it hugs my hips makes them look too fat."

Mina rolled her eyes. "She's such a piece of work." Pushing herself up, she held her arms out to you, wiggling little pink fingers for you to take. "Come on then. Let's get you sorted."

"What about that one you wore to the charity art thingy with Kyoka last winter? The one with the silver top."

"Silver is too close to white." You called out from within your closet.

"What! Not true!"

"You know that. I know that. Every person with two brain cells knows that, which is why most of my family does not know that."

"Fine..." She whined and started sifting through the opposite end of your closet. "Oh, what about this?" Mina waved about the blue and green plaid skirt that made up your uniform from your middle school days when you lived in America. "Please try this on. I'm begging!"

You were pretty sure it wouldn't even go over your thighs anymore.

"It's got a better chance of fitting you!"

Mina threw it at you anyway. Slipping off the sweats you wore, somehow, someway, you were able to tug it on AND get it zipped, barely. It no longer covered your ass but you still enjoyed the way it swished around when you wiggled your hips.

"You could be fulfilling so many people's fantasies right now." Mina mused.

You pulled the skirt off and sweats back on, throwing the former back at her. "Yeah, you can take it and go fulfill Hanta's fantasies if you like. Not like I've got anyone to impress." You pulled down a dress you bought on sale a year ago but Mina was quick to dismiss it.

Too puffy, she said and then held up one that was from Momo. "I needed to get it shortened and I don't have time for that now."

"Wait..." She hummed and dropped the Momo dress. "I know what it should be!"

Mina hurried through the closet, grumbling about not finding it. "Just tell me which dress and I can tell you where it's at."

"It's that one you got for grad night and then you got sick and couldn't go!"

"Mina, Mina I can't wear that! That's actual vintage, not like, made-to-look-vintage!"

"But it's so elegant and has that off-the-shoulder sleeve thing. The wedding is at a damn sky lodge! It'll look so pretty in the snow! Ah! Found it!"

She yanked up the long, elegant gown from the garment bag you'd never removed it from. There wasn't a single wrinkle in the burgundy fabric. It looked just as beautiful as the day you found it in that second-hand store, on a mannequin with gaudy stage jewels that you just had to buy so the look was complete.

You ran the back of your hand over the velvety fabric, soft to the touch. "It'll be too tight now. If I was the same size I was at graduation-"

"Bullshit!" Mina cut you off with a dismissive hand, "You've got hips now. We aren't 18 anymore! It's not like it's some clubbing dress. And I bet no one would say a damn thing about your figure if they knew how easily you could crush them with those thighs!"

A smirk tugged at the corner of your lips. Without quirks, you gave every single one of your classmates a run for their money in hand to hand. Most were fairly easy to beat. You could usually take down Eijiro in about five or six minutes and Katsuki in half the time. Funny enough, it was Ochaco that gave you the hardest time.

"I'll consider it. But help me find something else just in case."

>>><<<

It was another two hours before you finally agreed on an a-line, empire waist green and gold number that had been the bridesmaid's dresses for Tetsutetsu's wedding. Mina thought they were a crime the first time they had to wear them, she had no idea what you were thinking.

That's why the moment you were preoccupied with trying to find yet another dress for the Sunday brunch, Mina pulled out her phone.

You: DO NOT, under any circumstances, allow Y/N to wear the green dress. She's bringing two because she can't decide. Red is the winner!

Jaws: Aw, come on. If she likes it, let her wear whatever she's comfortable in. She'll be under enough stress already.

You: Kirishima, it's the dress from Tetsu's wedding. The one that looks sparkly baby food.

It took him a second to respond.

Jaws: Alright. Understood. I thought you guys looked good but damn, she hated that dress.

You: We all did.

Mina looked at the message chain again and couldn't help but asked, "Are we just gonna ignore the fact that you and Eiji are flying all the way to America, last minute, to attend a wedding together, even though you're not together?"

"We've flown to the states before."

"For work!" She sat up eagerly. "This is different, Y/N! This is a date and not just a, like, casual date but a wedding date!"

You poked your head out of the closet. "No, it isn't. This is a friend helping another friend who stupidly mismarked an RSVP." You corrected very plainly but Mina wasn't one to give up so easily.

She whined, dragging out your name, "You guys have been doing this thing for ages. Why do you have to be so stubborn about it all!"

"What's that supposed to mean!"

Mina started ticking off points on her fingers. "He was the first person you opened up to at UA. You saved his life when he was busy saving Katsuki's life second year. You spent all that time interning together, became sidekicks together. Went to America together for three whole months, ALONE, and you honestly expect me to think there's nothing between the two of you!"

The truth of it all was simple really; 17 year old you had a massive crush on Eijiro Kirishima. He was sweet, always listening to you, providing comfort when you needed it, and always encouraging you to push your limits. He was bright and honest, a little slow in the head from time to time but that made him all the more endearing.

He was also head over heels in love with Katsuki Bakugo.

It was why you never made a move. Never spoke a word of the feelings you harbored. You didn't dare to cross that line with him because you couldn't ever hold a candle to the explosive man.

In the three years Eijiro and Katsuki spent together, your brain finally started registering Eijiro as just a friend, nothing more, and certainly nothing less. You thought your heart had followed suit but it was becoming more and more apparent that wasn't the case. Because the night he showed up at your door, tears in his ruby eyes, every lock you put on your heart broke open.

The same way you couldn't hold a candle to Katsuki, Eijiro couldn't hold one to Izuku. You knew exactly what he was feeling even if you never intended to tell him. Too overcome with fear. If Katsuki came back... that'd be it. Eijiro would go back and you wouldn't even blame him!

Still, the redhead consumed a decent chunk of your heart though, you couldn't deny that after the three months you spent together in America, gathering intel on a smuggling ring, living in the same apartment. The groggy, 'good mornings' when his voice was still scratchy with sleep, hair falling in his eyes. The late nights bandaging wounds and killing cheap bottles of wine while watching terrible American reality shows.

It was those bottles of wine that did you in on your second to last night in America. Supplying you with courage and draining your sense of reason, allowing you to crawl onto his lap, into his arms. You could still remember the pressure of his lips on yours, those sharp teeth gently dragging along your lower lip.

Scared hands tracing the curve of your ass before taking handfuls to squeeze. The laugh that came from you was unlike anything you heard before, something so genuine that you couldn't reproduce.

How it felt when he lifted you up and took you to his bed, laying you down taking his time removing your clothes, and watching with awe as you pulled away his own. The way he looked over top of you, his hair a curtain of red around you just before you closed your eyes, gasping while he filled you.

You also remembered the guilt that crept into your head during the wee hours of the morning, the doubt that was louder than the snores coming from behind you.

It made you slip from under his massive arm, gather up your clothes from his floor, you tucked the blanket around him, and pressed a kiss to his temple before padding out of the room.

You told yourself you'd talk to him about it if he brought it up, but he never did. Not the next morning, or night, not on the plane ride back home, nor anytime since. It was a memory you'd hold close to your heart, one you wouldn't let slip away or share.

"There's nothing there, Mina. We're just good friends is all." You lied with a smile on your face, something that had become surprisingly easy to do.

If only you knew that Mina saw right through it. That Mina already knew the truth of it all.

>>><<<

It was nearly one in the morning when your phone rang. The goofy picture of Eijiro with face half painted at a festival a few years back never failed to make you grin.

"It's a little late." You answered by way of greeting.

"Don't pretend like you were anywhere close to sleeping, you little night owl."

Chuckling at the nickname that had followed you since high school, "What's up, Eiji?"

"I was going over flights. You said in the office that you wanted to leave on Friday?"

"Yeah. I have patrol tomorrow and I didn't find any flights after 6 PM so, Friday is the earliest."

He was quiet on the other line for a moment. "Yeah, you don't have patrol tomorrow, or work at all for that matter."

You sat up a bit straighter in bed. "Um, yes I do."

"No, you don't. I called Mina, asked her if you'd mind taking that shift for you and, since she knows what's happening, she agreed the extra day for travel would do you some good. So, she's covering you tomorrow then you're off work until next Wednesday. As for me, thanks to all that overtime I put in when Denki, Kyoka, and Hitoshi got married, the three of them are splitting up my days so I have until Wednesday too."

Eijiro sounded impossibly proud on the other line, you could almost see the smirk on his face. "You've got this all planned out, don't you?"

"And a bag nearly packed. Just need you to tell me what ties to bring."

"Gold, burgundy, and black."

"Thought your mom said no black for you?"

"She said no black for the wedding. She said nothing about black at the brunch!"

You couldn't wait to put on the tea-length dress that had been a favorite for years. Satin with a lacy top and, best of all, pockets.

He let out a rumbling laugh that fell off into comfortable silence as you laid back in your bed, lights still on, the room still a mess. You tapped the speaker icon and laid the phone on the pillow right beside your head, listing to the various sounds of Eijiro moving around.

A door creaking open, a hanger clattering against another, and a zipper. "And just like that, I'm all set."

"Don't forget your passport or hero license."

"I have one in my wallet and the other in my backpack."

You swiped up on your iPad, off Netflix, and going to google, lazily searching through flights. "So, did you find any good flights since you've clearly been looking?"

Another chuckle, "Eijiro, why are you laughing?" More stifled giggles had you sitting up in bed again. "Just tell me a site you were on. They're just flights, what's so funny?"

"There isn't a site."

"You said you were checking flights."

"And I was... on my family's jet."

"Eiji! No! No, no, no! That is supposed to be for their business or hero things! My stupid cousin's wedding is neither of those things!"

"Relax, Y/N. My family has multiple and they don't have any business trips planned right now anyways. I already cleared it with my mom. Seriously, I just mention your name and she's likely to let me have it for a whole year at least. Plus Todoroki's is back up in working order so the agency is covered too."

Damn, why'd he have to be so good at planning from time to time! You'd completely forgotten about the second jet his family had. Always opting for the larger one since the few missions they needed it for required them to bring fifty or so heroes along.

"Besides, if we fly private, we can land at an airstrip closer to the venue and won't need to drive four hours on top of a ten-hour flight."

"Alright, okay, thank you but, let me take care of the rental car, please. It's the least you can let me do."

"Deal. I just have one more question for ya."

"What's that?"

"Wanna leave tonight?"

You nearly dropped your damn iPad in shock. "Eijiro! What the fuck has gotten into you! It's the middle of the night!"

"I'm excited!" He boomed, "I haven't had a vacation in months!"

"I hate to break this to you, buddy, but this isn't going to be a vacation. You really shouldn't get your hopes up. This isn't going to be a good time with laughs and fun memories... my family, they just, they aren't those kinds of people."

"But we are." He stated matter-of-factly. "If they want to have sticks up their asses then let them! We'll have a good time on our own, laugh and make fun memories! So, what do you say, Y/N? I can be at your place in fifteen. I just gotta put shoes on and grab my keys..."

"Wait, hang on. Are you forgetting that we need someone to, oh, I dunno, FLY THE PLANE! Actually, we need two someone's, can't forget about a co-pilot!"

He hummed happily and you rubbed your temples. "You, you have a pilot and a co, don't you, Eiji?"

"Mhm! There is a company we use. Two can be at the hanger in an hour and every hour after that. I just have to make the call and get the flight plan approved which will be done before I even get to your house."

There was literally no reason to say no. You had mostly everything packed, nothing you needed to get from the store, all you had to do was put on pants and pack up your hygiene bag and you were ready too. Maybe getting there quicker and getting the whole thing over with would be better than staying home dwelling on everything.

"Better put your shoes on."

The glee in his voice, that was enough to make this whole thing worth it, "I'll see you soon."

>>><<<

Eijiro reached into the backseat and plopped a bag down on your lap the very moment you were buckled in. "Had to make a pit stop." He explained.

"It's after two in the morning, where'd you have to..."

"Just open the bag and don't complain."

You found it filled to the brim with all your favorite snacks.

"I'm sure the plane will have a bunch of snacks we can raid but I know for a fact they don't have these." He held up a pack of cookies and creme flavored pocky that had been his favorite for as long as you'd known him, quickly followed by your favorite flavor too. You also found a massive bag of gummy worms and jolly ranchers.

"So, what you're telling me is our teeth are going to rot by the time we land? Not that I'm complaining."

You ripped open the bag of ranchers knowing that was what he'd go for first and sure enough his hand dove inside just as he pulled away from the curb. You could hear his dangerously sharp teeth biting through the rock candy like it was nothing while you still rolled one around your mouth.

Eijiro asked you about the resort you'd be going to, wondering if you'd been there before or what other stuff you guys could do when you weren't dealing with your family. "I figured we could fly back Monday night or Tuesday morning, you know, just play it by ear in case there was anything else we wanted to do."

More than anything, you wished you could just leech a little bit of that excitement from him. The glimpses of his smile you caught as you drove under the street lights made your heart ache.

"What?" He asked with that wide smile of his. You'd been caught staring, red-handed.

"I, uh, I just don't know what to tell you."

You could see the subtle change of his grin, watch as it softened and his hand came to rest on your thigh. "Hey, it's gonna be fine! And if we run into them while out doing stuff, you can just avoid them or hide behind me!" At least hiding behind Eijiro is an easy thing to do, damn mountain of a man.

His thumb slowly brushed back and forth. "'S gonna be okay. I'll beat 'em up if they're assholes!"

You snickered at his Katsuki impression and let the drone of the radio fill the air around you both. Enjoying the silence the rest of the way to the hanger with Eijiro's hand atop your leg.

[oro-e-diamanti]

The one with Ethan’s suggestion

Description | Ethan suggests something that you had never seen coming - but for how long will you be able to resist him?

Content | smut with a bit of fluff

Pairing | Ethan x fem!Reader

Word Count | 3138

Tagging | @ginny-lily @mywritingonlyfans

***

"You did not just ask me that."

Ethan didn't even seem bothered by your shocked reaction. Instead, he simply kept looking at you, waiting, as if he had posed a completely normal question. You were certain it wasn’t though - who the hell just came out and asked one of their best friends to start hooking up? Surely this wasn’t just you thinking this was more than odd. You couldn’t stop looking at him, relaxing on a lounger in the sun, book still open in his hand, and how he didn’t seem to care.

“Oh, come one, Y/n,” Vic interjected from where she was relaxing on a pool float. “Poor Ethan hasn’t been with anyone since the pandemic started. The least you can do is help him get laid.”

“Get laid by me?!”

“Who else?” Victoria laughed. “It’s not like he can go out and pick up someone when we go on a promo tour in a week. We’re barely allowed to meet anyone as a safety measure.”

You shot her a pointed look and Victoria being your friend for the longest got it immediately.

“And no, I’m not gonna hook up with him. So it’s gotta be you.”

You couldn’t believe the conversation you were having. Had everyone simply gone crazy? Surely, Thomas wouldn’t be on their side in this, right? You watched as he lazily strolled towards your loungers, cigarette in hand.

“Thomas!” You shouted over at him. “Ethan wants me to hook up with him!”

“Fucking finally,” Thomas laughed as you stared back in horror. Was everyone in on this madness? “He’s been moping around for ages. About time he gets laid and relaxes.”

“See?” Ethan interjected. “Everyone thinks it’s a good idea.”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea!”

“Fine,” Ethan shrugged. You hated how much he didn’t seem to care - how he had posed a question like that without an ounce of awkwardness and how your rejection didn’t seem to faze him in the least. You knew he was open about sex and sexuality, you’d been part of countless conversations among the band and had seen him pick up people at parties more than once, but this unnerved you. "If you change your mind, I'm available."

And with that Ethan went back to his book, Victoria went back to floating around the pool and Thomas went back to smoking his cigarette. But you weren't going to go back to anything, because whether you liked it or not, Ethan's suggestion would continue playing in your head for the unforeseeable future.

***

Three days. It had been three days since that fateful day at the pool and you could barely stand to look at Ethan. It wasn't because you were embarrassed - you all spoke about such things quite openly - nor were you angry at him having asked in the first place - if anything, it was flattering, a man such as Ethan considering you attractive in that way. It was more of a constant thought in your head whenever you were in the same room with him or he talked to you or you looked at him or he so much as popped into your mind. You kept lying awake at night, intrusive thoughts of Ethan towering over you clouding your brain. You didn't know what it was but you knew you didn't like it.

You were pulled out of your thoughts as Victoria approached you, taking a couple of tomatoes you had spread in front of you and started cutting them up. You had been in charge of making dinner most days, with one or the other coming to join you in your cooking endeavors sooner or later. Today it seemed to be Vic, who was giggling away beside you, quite obviously dying to tell you something.

"And what is up with you?" You asked, a smirk on your face. You were happy your friend seemed so giddy and it had you itching to know why.

"I have a date!" Victoria was never one to keep things like these to herself for long - whenever she was positively excited about something, the world simply had to know. "Her name's Paula, she's on holiday here and we're going to go out for wine."

"Just wine?"

"Well, I'm gonna say, don't expect me back here tonight." She couldn't stop herself from smirking and then breaking out in another round of laughter and you joined freely. Good for her.

"I miss dates," you mused. "Or maybe - I don't know. Maybe I just miss at least staying the night with someone."

"You really need to get laid, babe."

"Who needs to get laid?" Damiano had appeared without warning, sneaking up on the two of you and pinching both of your waists teasingly before hopping on the counter next to where you were working. A slice of tomato was stolen and ended up in his mouth before you could react, only hitting him in the arm when it was much too late.

"Y/n," Victoria answered nonchalantly. You stared at her in annoyance but she didn't even catch your eye.

"So does Ethan! You guys should fuck."

"Not you too," you groaned. All of this seemed like a bad joke. In fact, you were starting to wonder if this was all some weird plot your friends had to get you to sleep with Ethan. But why would they?

"Huh?" Damiano sounded surprised but you didn't put it past him to simply put on a good act.

"Ethan asked her to hook up the other day."

"No way!" Damiano exclaimed. "He actually, fina- I mean, he actually asked you that?"

"Yup, and she shot him down," Victoria explained. You were getting more annoyed by the second. Especially because it felt like your love life (or lack thereof?) was being discussed without you. Plus, you couldn't shake the feeling they knew something you didn't.

"Aw, poor Ethan. You know, you should really give him the chance. Make the most of the fact that you've both got the house to yourselves tonight." Damiano's eyebrow wiggle earned him a tomato slice to the face due to pure irritation on your side. He wasn't bothered, quickly shoving it into his mouth and happily munching away on it.

"Wait, what do you mean? Where are you going?"

You sounded much more panicked than necessary. So what if you were alone in the house with Ethan? You'd survive. Easily. You'd read a bit of your book, maybe watch a movie, go to bed. You didn't even have to spend time with him. Right?

"Going out with my girlfriend, she's in town for work. Not sure where Thomas is off to but he's already left" Damiano shrugged, finally hopping off the counter to hopefully stop being in the way. "So, if there's anything you want to do, do it tonight."

***

So this was it. You were alone with Ethan. No, this was nothing. So what if you were alone with him? Not like it was going to change anything at all.

You had said your goodbyes for the night to the two lovebirds, wishing Victoria the most possible fun on her little date, before pouring yourself a glass of wine and retreating to the patio. You had no idea where Ethan was and you didn't mind.

The sun was setting, the temperature was more than bearable and you had your book lying next to you. Eyes closed trying to enjoy the last rays of sunshine, your hand grasped the stem of the wine glass, and fuck that moth scared the living daylights out of you. And caused you to spill your wine all over your blouse. Red wine. Crap. One was supposed to wash those out immediately, right? Right? You realised you had no idea, as you sprinted towards the upstairs bathroom, already unbuttoning for fast removal.

You threw the door open, feet set to move towards the basin, when you realised you weren't alone in the room. It happened in slow motion, as much as you hated the cliché of it all.

Ethan's back was towards you, strong, hard muscles visible under an array of water droplets that were slowly, slowly making their way downwards, hypnotising you and keeping your gaze locked on them. Your eyes were still travelling lower and lower when he noticed your presence, turning around out of reflex, and you could not help but notice he was not wrapped in a towel, nowhere close, when your eyes fell on-

Oh.

Oh.

In a rare moment of clarity, you tore your gaze away, looking up at his face instead, just to find him eyeing up your cleavage. Your blouse was halfway undone, putting your white lace bra on full display. Then his eyes snapped away and looked into yours instead. For a second, it felt like the world was standing still. Your brain only worked for another moment before it decided to let your body - or potentially your heart? - take over.

You told yourself 'fuck it' - or maybe you said it out loud, judging by the sudden smirk appearing on Ethan's face - and reached for the man in front of you. He reciprocated without hesitation, pulling you in and meeting your mouth with his, as he walked you backward until you hit the wall. His body felt hot against yours, providing a stark contrast to the cold tiles pressing into you. His hands cradled your face softly, fingers stroking along your cheeks, while he kissed you, open-mouthed, in a way that left you breathless.

If you had ever had doubts that sex with Ethan would not be worth it, they had evaporated into thin air altogether.

His hands had started roaming your body, finally landing on the last buttons of your blouse. You had expected him to slowly open them up, but instead, he tore the fabric apart in one swift movement, buttons flying and hitting the ground with little clacking noises. You wrecked your mouth from him for a moment, staring at him in both surprise and awe.

"Spiacente," he murmured, although he didn't look all that sorry. "I couldn't help myself. I can get them sewn back-"

"Ethan, stop talking and start fucking me."

Your bold words took both of you by surprise but none of you minded, simply relieved that you were on the same page. His hands were now grasping tightly onto your thighs and, and without giving you a warning, he lifted you up, still pressed against the wall. Your legs wrapped around him instinctively and he took a step back, finding his strength and balance, and slowly carrying you into his bedroom.

You couldn't stop staring at him. Ethan's beauty was a sight to behold on any given day, but the way his lips looked kissed after just a short while and his eyes had that kind of shine to them that had never previously been directed at you, it felt like you were looking at something ethereal. Never mind the fact that you knew he was completely naked, not just the toned chest that was pressing into your torse, but everything else. Hell, you were sure you felt a certain something press into the back of your thigh quite shamelessly.

He dropped you on his bed, leaving you to bounce slightly on the mattress as you lied on your back. He looked like he was about to devour you and you just knew you'd bend to his every wish.

Without any further hesitation, Ethan moved onto the bed, immediately grabbing onto the shorts you were wearing and slowly pulling them down your legs. He held eye contact with you the whole time and you were convinced you had never seen anything sexier in your life. Your panties were the next piece to leave your body. Normally, this would be the point you got nervous about, crossing your legs, hiding behind hands, anything to protect what little of your modesty you had left, but this was different. Ethan took all shame away from you.

"Is this okay?" He asked, as he slowly crawled upwards, spreading your legs and leaving hot, wet kisses along your calves. As much as you appreciated him asking for consent, you almost had to laugh - at this point in time, you had lost all willpower to deny him anything. So, with a blissful smile on your face, you eagerly nodded at him, your hand reaching down and tangling itself into his hair. He groaned as you gave a little tug and the sound was more than enough to get you even wetter than you already were.

At least that was what you thought up until Ethan put his mouth on you. You had been expecting a bit more foreplay, maybe his fingers, but instead you felt his tongue lick along the length of you. Your moan loudly echoed through the room and you had never been so glad that Vic, Thomas and Damiano had deserted the two of you in the house.

Your grasp on his hair tightened as he started flicking your clit with the tip of his tongue. The fact that you could feel his hair tickling the inside of your thighs only seemed to make you more sensitive. Suddenly, one of his fingers entered you, quickly to be joined by a second. Your back arched off the bed in an involuntary reaction as your breathing became more and more laboured. You could hear- hell, you could feel him chuckle against you.

With a sharp tug, you pulled his head away from you.

"I'm not going to be able to take much more, Ethan," you confessed. He looked up at you with wide eyes, chin wet from going down on you and fingers still slowly moving in and out, and you momentarily forgot what you meant to say. "So if you wanna fuck me, I suggest you get a move on."

He didn't need to be told twice. You still sighed in disappointment when he actually removed his fingers from you but you were quickly distracted by him moving them to your mouth and slipping them in. You eagerly sucked on them, twirling your tongue around them, tasting your own arousal, and his composure was slipping with every second he looked at you. He quickly pulled his fingers from your mouth to crawl further up your body, his cock moving against your leg. He was so well endowed it would have almost been frightening if you hadn't been so turned on.

Ethan kissed you with a force that was unparalleled. There wasn't even a question about who was in control. As his fingers trailed from your neck down past your collarbones you both suddenly seemed to remember you were still wearing a bra. You made short work of the piece of fabric, carelessly throwing it across the room, and he thanked you by squeezing your soft flesh in the most delicious way. You repaid the favour by letting your hand wander to his cock and giving him a few strokes. He immediately let out the most sinful moan you had ever heard, head collapsing onto your cleavage.

"I don't think you need any more help from me down there," you giggled.

"With you lying under me like this, I sure don't."

Moving your legs around his waist once more, you slowly guided him into you, your walls swallowing him bit by bit, careful not to stretch you out too fast with his size. It felt like heaven on earth. You both moaned in pleasure as Ethan slowly started moving, making sure you were comfortable as he looked into your eyes, while you broke the eye contact time and time again, too overwhelmed to leave your eyes open every time he thrust into you. You kept grabbing onto what you could, the back of his head, his shoulders, his butt, as he increased his speed, hitting you in all the right places every single time.

You knew you weren't going to last long, not with him on and in and all around you, not with his fingers playing with your nipple, not with his lips clumsily attaching themselves to various places around your neck and shoulders, and as you felt his hand between your legs, softly circling your clit once again, you were gone. You came in waves of euphoria, unashamed of the volume of your moans and the strength with which you pulled on his hair. Your actions, combined with you clenching around him and a few more thrust, had him follow you moments later.

He carefully slipped out of you, never once letting go of you, and turning you onto your side with him so you were facing each other. Both of you were still breathing heavily, vision cloudy, but intertwined. You were convinced he had ruined you - there was no way anyone was ever going to live up to how he made you feel.

"So, did it live up to your expectation?" You couldn't help but giggle as you posed the question. "Getting laid again after such a long time?"

Ethan pushed a damp strand of hair from your face. You hadn't expected such softness.

"It wasn't actually about getting laid, you know."

"Huh?"

"It was about you."

"Okay, you've lost me now," you said, brows knitting as your hand searched for his, finger entangling the same way your legs were doing. "What are you talking about?"

"I... I've liked you for a while. And I tried so much, but you never even noticed."

Your mind replayed the last few weeks you had spent with the band in their summer house. Instances of Ethan bringing you food, cocktails, adjusting the shade to make sure you were in it, offering to put sunscreen on your back. Moments of him searching for your company, moving much closer than necessary in the heat, arms constantly touching when you were sitting next to each other. Jokes and teasing from the others, drunken remarks. You hadn't paid attention to any of it. You wondered how you could have been so blind to a man so wonderful.

"Wait, so instead of asking me out like a normal person, you suggested we hook up?" You couldn't keep the laughter in now. The situation was simply too ridiculous and you had not yet stopped riding on your high from the endorphins he had caused.

"It was Vic's idea." He buried his head into the sheets, but you could still see his cheeks turn an adorable shade of pink. "She knew I missed sex and she said you mentioned something similar so she thought this was the way into your..."

"Pants?"

"Heart, actually."

You snuggled closer, arms wrapping around him so that your noses were touching.

"Well, as embarrassing as it is, it somehow worked, didn't it?" You stroked over his head lovingly. "And I'm sure not letting you go any time soon."

[talkfantasytome]

A holiday Nessian prompt for you if you please: 'I work at the local library and I’m trying to put up all the decorations myself, but I fell off the ladder trying to hang up the garland and you caught me.' 🎄⛄💕💕

So sweet. 🥺🥺

I wasn't planning on doing this one today, but I started it while waiting at the vet and in between when he'd be in and out. Trying to be one of the cool kids that can bust out dribbles super fast...I am not one of those cool kids. 👀 But, when I got home I just had to finish it. XD At least now it gets a graphic, too.

Nesta's in the midst of decorating the library when one of the library's newest members comes in.

Warnings: None | Word Count: 1,007 | Nessian Masterlist

"He's here again."

"Who?" Nesta asked, not even bothering to look at Gwyn.

Gwyn huffed out a sigh. "That guy! You know, superhero tall and strong, gorgeous, totally in love with you."

She felt herself pause, a pit expanding in her gut as butterflies flapped around it. Cassian.

She was all too aware of Cassian. He came to the library a few weeks before to get out some specific book. Nesta checked him out that night, which took longer than normal because he had to sign up for the membership first so they could keep the record. At the end of the conversation she'd suggested he try and find a reason to use it. He told her he already had.

Sure enough, he was back every few days after that.

"He's not in love with me," Nesta argued, rolling her eyes and raising her chin to hide the nerves. "Hand me that garland?"

Nesta held out her hand, clasping it around the fine, prickly, fake pine needles once she felt them.

"You're so in denial. Half the time he doesn't even check out a book. He just pretends to browse and then chats you up for fifteen minutes."

She tried not to smile at the comment. Not that it was new information. Nesta hadn't missed that little fact, she just didn't want Gwyn to know she might like it.

"Maybe he doesn't know how to read." She draped some of the garland over the nail that was already set into the shelf. Years of librarians hanging garlands meant Nesta luckily didn't have to bother with any actual tools.

"You're hopeless. I swear, one da- shit, he's coming!"

Nesta looked down to see Gwyn bolting away. She shook her head and went back to her task, finding the next nail to drape more garland on.

"Getting the books into the holiday spirit?" a low voice mused.

Nesta didn't have to turn to know who was standing there. Not as her heart skipped a beat at the gruff timbre. She took in a deep breath, trying to calm the buzzing she felt beneath her skin.

After a moment, she faced him, putting on a soft, indifferent smile. "Don't they deserve to celebrate as much as we do?"

"I'm sure you'd say they deserve it more," he chuckled, the sound cascading across Nesta's body like a gentle wave.

"I wouldn't be wrong."

She finally let herself look, her eyes meeting his hazel stare instantly, like murky brown waters that draw you in with their mystery, only to trap you in them.

He smiled up at her, his face lightening with it. "Can I help you with the decorating?"

Nesta pursed her lips for a moment. "I could use a push to the left to get the last of this garland strung." His smile widened and he did as requested, pushing the rolling ladder over a bit until she was at an uncovered section of the book shelf.

"So, do you have any plans tonight?" he asked as Nesta worked to hang the string of pine and lights over the one of the last nails.

Her mind on the decorations, she mindlessly replied, "I don't think so."

"Great!" he exclaimed, as loudly as he could while still whispering. She was just reaching with her left hand to get to the last nail, pushing herself onto her toes when he added, "Would you like to have dinner with me?"

Her entire body froze and twitched in shock all at once, her balance lost on the slick ladder. Before she knew what was happening she was falling backwards, too far gone to grab on to the ladder and hold herself steady. Yet her feet were still touching the rung when she halted, a heat radiating off of whatever she was suddenly curled against.

Nesta looked up into those same eyes, gold flecks sparkling in the fairy lights from the garland. He held her gently, but with enough strength that Nesta knew she was safe in his arms.

"Are you always such an overachiever?" he teased, laughing at the joke in his head. "I wasn't going to ask you to fall for me until at least our second date."

Her breathing heavy, Nesta could barely find the words, her voice. "I didn't even say yes, yet."

His lips curved upward again, dimples appearing by the right corner. "That doesn't mean I'm not already hoping for a second."

He finally let her down, setting her feet on the ground but keeping and arm around her waist for support until she found her footing.

"And planning for one, it seems," Nesta shot back, her gaze never leaving his.

"And a third, and a fourth, and a fifth," he agreed, stepping her back until she was flush against the shelf.

Nesta inhaled sharply at the impact, at how his scent of embers and a winter's breeze enveloped her entirely as he braced a hand by her head. "My, you seem to have me booked for quite a few weeks."

He twitched his head to the left slightly, as if to say 'sort of'. "If you'll let me."

"I think we should just start with the one, and not get ahead of ourselves."

His stare twinkled with something Nesta couldn't quite read. "Way too late for that."

He leaned in slowly and Nesta felt her breath completely leave her body. She braced herself, something throbbing within her, ready for the kiss to come, even as she tried to look like she hadn't imagined it every night since that first time he came into the library. But his lips never found hers.

Instead, they rested by her ear, hot air blowing lightly against the ridge of it.

"I'll pick you up from here at seven," he whispered, his voice rough in a way that had Nesta quivering.

He left a single kiss on Nesta's neck, just beneath her ear, and then strode away. Leaving Nesta against the shelf, attempting to pick up whatever pieces of herself had been scattered about.

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[myveryownfanfiction]

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE DNI

HAVE AGE IN BIO

OTHERWISE YOU WILL BE BLOCKED

warnings: verbal/written abuse, swearing, snape, possible unhealthy coping mechanisms, friends not being able to count on friends

AN: this is going to be long. I’ll have something different and more cheerful up for tomorrow. Promise.

my hand trembled as I signed the letter. It wouldn’t be received well anyway, having an owl delivering anything never was, but it was for my sanity this year. Having one holiday where I felt at ease and at home. If it went well, if I liked how it felt, I’d keep staying. Or at least for as long as I could. five years had gone by so fast and I knew the next two would as well but by then I could join the wizarding world for good and I never had to look back. It would hurt to leave the only place I could call home but hogwarts would always be there. I was good at charms and maybe I could try to get a teaching position when I graduated. But I had two years to figure that out.

It took two days for a response. I was glad to have been a muggle born in that moment. I distinctly remember the howler that sirius black got. The way his mothers voice filled the hall. The way he couldn’t do anything to stop it. All because he had done the same thing I was doing now. And the fact my muggle parents wanted nothing to do with magic meant that if the letter got too bad I could simply stop reading and that would be that. I swallowed as sirius sat down next to me before gently putting a hand on my leg.

“that their response?” I nodded. “Want me to read it first?” I shook my head. “Want me to stay here just in case?” I nodded again. Sirius squeezed my leg and reached across the table for a cinnamon roll. “I’ll be right here then.” He started eating as I unfolded the letter. ‘Dear (Y/N),

Who the fuck do you think you are? Spending Christmas at that school instead of at home where you belong? What the hell do you think you are trying to prove? They send students home for a reason but I guess you failed at even that. Stay if you want but don’t expect there to be any gifts if you do. And don’t expect them to be here when you come back at the end of the year. If we let you back. Why we didn’t kick you out when you got that damn letter is still a mystery. If you stay the holidays, let that headmaster know you will require a new place to stay and money but you know what he’ll suggest in order to earn it. if you don’t you’re dumber than we thought and that’s saying something. And if you even think about using your magic to continue to attend that school, we will be taking it up with the proper authorities.

Remind your teachers that we need to talk to them about your poor work ethics and that they are supposed to let us know when your grades are slipping. We can only assume that being the lying bitch you are you never told them. I guess you’re magic isn’t worth anything if you can’t do something as simple as remember to ask for help. Do so or we will be paying a visit to the school to inform them ourselves. The same with the headmaster. Write back to us right away, the correct way, telling us you have done as you are told and include the information we have asked for. If not, well let’s just say you aren’t going to like the consequences. You’re lucky we haven’t pull you out of that damn school. Yet. We’ll be waiting for you at kings cross in a week. mom and dad’

It felt like my throat was closing up as I folded the letter back up. Sirius glanced at me before going back to what he deemed his breakfast.

“everything ok?“ his hand was back on my leg.

“no.” I choked out. Sirius removed his hand and waited for me to put the letter in it. He flicked it open and read it.

“oh shit.” He forgot about his breakfast As his eyes scanned over the contents of the letter. “(Y/N), I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” My shoulder shook with the effort to keep my emotions in check. Sirius slipped his arm over them as I made to get up. I looked at his Face in fear before submitting to his care. “I’m staying this year. So is remus And Peter. We’ll keep an eye on you.” I shook my head.

“and potter?” I scoffed. Sirius bit his lip. Remus had joined us as we stared each other down. I glanced at his face before shaking my head again. “Right. What protection can you offer me from your own friend Sirius? face it the only reason we get along is because magic or not some families are shit. If James had his way we wouldn’t have anything else in common. So thanks but no thanks. I’ll figure it out on my own.” I took my letter back, angry tears burning my eyes as I stood up and fled the great hall. In my mind there was only one place to go. the potions classroom. James potter wouldnt dare set foot down there unless he had to and the slytherins wouldn’t bother me if they thought that I was just trying to better myself in a class everyone had trouble with. I brushed past students heading to breakfast as I repeated the contents of the letter in my head. Tears started to spill just as I reached the dungeons. Slytherins looked at me curiously as I pushed past them before I finally found the door I was looking for. Without looking up, I reached for the handle. I jumped back when my hand brushed another.

“sorry.” We both breathed out. My eyes met with the dark brown eyes of Severus snape.

“Severus. Sorry. I… sorry.” I shook my head as I quickly wiped at some of the tears.

“(Y/N)? Are you ok?” He reached towards me gently as I kept wiping tears away. My laugh was shaky as I realized I didn’t even think of the one slytherin that wouldn’t even question why a gryffindor was practicing potions let alone why I was. Severus looked at me with a worried expression before he gently grabbed my wrist. “No you’re not. Come on. I know somewhere we can go. You have a free period right?” I nodded as he gently tugged Me along. “So do I. We can stay there until the next.“ I followed him blindly as he led me past the throngs of students, up to the third floor and down an abandoned corridor. We passed and empty wall once. Twice. Three times before a door appeared. Despite all I had just been through, my eyes widened in shock and my head whipped over to look at Severus. “Cool right?” I nodded as he pushed through the door and we entered a room that could only be described as a combination of the gruff indie and slytherin common rooms. I put my bag down by the door and Severus set his down on the other side.

“what is this place?” I asked as I looked around. The fireplace roared to life and Severus led the way over to it. Just like in the gryffindor common room, there was a cubby where we could sit and that seemed to be the plan. “It’s incredible. Does it always look like this?” I wiped my eyes again and Severus smiled at the sudden inquisitiveness that I was displaying.

“It’s called the room of requirement. It changes to whatever the person needs. Right now we need something comforting. So it created this room.“ Severus raised a brow at the red and gold decorations in the room but waved a hand at them. “You feel most comfortable in the gryffindor common room and I feel most comfortable in the slytherin common room so they combined.“ I nodded as Severus sat down next to the fire. I joined him and turned So I was staring at the fire.

“comfortable.“ I nodded. ”definitely something I need right now.“ I sighed as Severus put his hand on my shoulder, a stark contrast to Sirius with his hand on my leg. Less territorial. more careful. Less confident. More….friendly.

“do you want to talk about why you were running crying to the potions room?” My shoulders fell in despair. I half heartedly held up the folded letter that was still clasped in my hand. “This?” I nodded as I returned my focus to the fire, not wanting to see one of the few people I could call a friend finally finding out what my family was like. I mentally scoffed. As if I could actually call the marauders my friends. Severus on the other hand. Maybe I could call him my friend. Which did admittedly cause a few issues with our houses but talent recognized talent and stuck together. “What are you going to do?” His voice snapped me out of my trance. I tore my eyes away from the fire to look at him. There was genuine concern and worry in his eyes. And he was normally so good at hiding his emotions.

“I don’t know.” I shrugged before shifting in my seat. “I don’t think they really mean it. But then again sometimes,” I trailed off. Severus reached for my hand. “Sometimes they are. And i can’t tell.“ I held onto his hand like it was a lifeline. “If I stay, I have no where to go. Or I might have never come back here.” Severus squeezed my hand again. “If I go home, I might not come back. or I might not have a place to go.” Severus nodded before looking at the letter in his other hand.

“i have an idea.” He said after a pause. “What if you told them you were going to use the holidays to work on your skills? Get extra help from the professors? They couldn’t say no to that.“ I blinked at him in surprise. “And I’m sure you could get mcgonagall to fake a letter. Slughorn too. Maybe even flickwit. If not I can forge his. Then send them home say once a week or every two weeks. I’m sure we could even get dumbledore in on it if they so wished.” There was a beat of silence. I threw myself at Severus and hugged him tight, much to his surprise. His arms wrapped around to keep us upright and quickly tightened.

“Severus! That’s brilliant!” My voice was muffled by his shoulder. “I don’t know how you came up with that but it’s perfect!” Severus tightened his grip before rubbing my back. “The best part is I get to stay here and do whatever I want with them none the wiser! thank you!”

“you’re welcome.” Severus‘s quiet baritone seemed to vibrate through me. I pulled back enough to look him in the eye.

”I mean it Severus. I’m really thankful.“ he nodded before we separated and continued to enjoy the comfort of the fire.

“what are you going to do about potter?” His question cut through the comfortable silence. I made a face. “Oh come on. I know he’s as much a problem for you as he is me. Even with you hanging around with the other three.“ I rolled my eyes and nodded.

“you’re right. Even if I don’t want to admit it.“ I gently pushed his shoulder with mine. Severus smiled as I kept leaning against him. “I don’t know yet. I guess I’ll just deal with him when it comes time to.” There was a beat of silence. “you’re staying too right?” Severus nodded as he leaned his head against mine.

“yeah. Which puts me in the same spot as you.” I nodded in agreement. “Except I don’t have the other three to come pick up the pieces afterwards.”

“don’t say that. Cuz they don’t.“ I bit out harshly. “All they do is ignore what he had just done and try to make me forget that he does it.“ there was a silence that settled over us then. I took a deep breath before turning to look at him, making Severus lift his head up. “what I was going to suggest was we spend more time in here. We can work on whatever we need to and practice or just come here to read. Enjoy each other’s company as it were.“ Severus nodded. “It has the added perk of avoiding James potter as well.“

“that actually sounds lovely.” Severus agreed before looking into the fire. “Probably will be the best holidays I’ve ever had.” I nodded in agreement.

“so it’s settled. I’ll send you an owl at breakfast if we’re going to meet up and it’ll have a list of things I need to work on and any supplies we’ll need. Then we meet up in the corridor and find the room for the day.“ Severus nodded and we shook on it. I saw his watch peeking out from his shirtsleeve. “Oh shit. We have to go. Ten minutes before first period is over. We can just beat the masses back down to the dungeons in time for potions.” Severus checked his watch himself as i tossed the letter into the fire. We collected our belongings. Just before we left, I leaned over and kissed his cheek. “seriously Severus. Thank you.” I got a glimpse of his pale pink cheeks before the door appeared and we exited the room. Trying to lighten the mood, I hitched my bag up my shoulder. “Race ya to the dungeons.” I tagged his shoulder and took off down the hall. I just missed the eye roll Severus sent my way as he started down the hall, calling after me.

[hansolmates]

one more time (m)

pairing; (former) popular!jk x (former) normie!reader summary; it’s been two years since you’ve seen your former tryst jeon jungkook. you didn’t expect him to be applying for the internship you’re currently running, along with the rate your heart is running at the sight of him in a black suit. genre/warnings; self-deprecating language, your typical (future) co-workers!au, jungkook is a piner and so is oc, a lil bit of sneaking around, adulting, a mutual understanding of feelings (finally!!) smut in the form of—soft n’ dirty baybee, unprotected, cockwarming, overstimulation, minor praise and possession kink, cumplay, &you know that they gon have heart eyes the entire time w.c; 7.3k a/n; darn why am i so... emotional over this??? it started out as a meaningless drabble series but with all my lovely readers and moots it’s grown into such a fun, introspective series. thank u for loving this and joining me on this journey. for those of u who are new to this series feel free to read popular-ish first or as a standalone! [popular-ish masterlist]

if you’ve enjoyed this (whether as a standalone or as a series) please consider giving it a like and a share✨✨✨✨✨

“A mess, I’m a mess,” you sing-song to yourself, organizing the manuals on the clear glass by subject and size. The applications of all your new interns are alphabetized, not a form out of place. Everything’s perfect. “Alright Jessica, all twenty of the interns are accounted for.” 

“Actually, there’s twenty-three,” Jessica quips, and you let your shoulders slump. Being part of the recruiting team of your company has been simultaneously exciting and stressful. Stressful because of the constant travel, but otherwise exciting because you loved your internship at your current company. You remember how nervous you were two years ago, and how much support and help you got from your recruiters. Applying to this team was a natural turn of events. 

“A-are you sure, Jess?” you look through all the applications, count the amount of nametags, triple check the chairs. You’re sweating through your blazer, wondering where you went wrong. 

The head of your recruiting team glues one hand to her hip, while the other hand is holding her iPad, scrolling with her thumb. You swallow, intimidated by Jessica’s golden wavy locks and her black-trimmed white Chanel pantsuit. 

“Yep, but don’t be too hard on yourself. I just added three more recruits last night. I’ll get the chairs and the apps are being printed. No worries,” Jessica assures, gesturing for you to hurry up and get outside, “Call the babies in!” your team leader waves her finger around like a magic wand, commanding you to the front lines. 

Krystal puts a hand on her shoulder, as always looking impeccable. She has virtually nothing to worry about. She’s a woman who has connections, courtesy of her team leader. “Let’s go, newbie,” she teases, pulling you through the door. 

The recruits in the lobby are wide-eyed and vibrant, and you feel a little nostalgic as you watch them line up in front of you and Krystal as you sign them in. You would dwell on the feeling more if it wasn’t for your exhaustion, so you decide you’ll get a chance to take a road down memory lane when you get to the hotel. 

“Name?” 

“Xu Minghao.” 

“Congrats Minghao, here’s your nametag and I’ll see you inside,” with a firm handshake, one recruiter is free to go. 

“Name?” 

“Chou Tzuyu.” 

“Congrats Tzuyu, here’s your name tag and I’ll see you inside,” she doesn’t go in straight away, and moves to the side of the door. “Actually,” you pause mid-handshake with another recruit, staring at the woman in curiosity, “my boyfriend just got a call last night that he was accepted in this year’s batch. Do you have his name?” 

“Yes, three more recruits were added,” you chirp, as if you totally did not hear that bit of information five minutes ago, “What’s his name—Jungkook?” 

The both of you blink at each other. One hand on Tzuyu’s shoulder, eyes wide and mirroring yours. Your heart falls straight to your stomach, wanting to be eaten by acids and bacteria so you can stop any possibility of feeling any lingering affection for the boy you fooled around with in undergrad. Everything about him screams professional. He’s clean cut, a pinstripe black suit you never thought he’d own, and his hair is neatly trimmed and pulled behind his ears. His shoulders look tall and broad under the slight padding, his biceps comfortably stretching against the dark fabric. The golden complexion remains the same however, from the honest brown eyes to the coral pink lips that would always smile at you. 

“Oh, so you do have his name!” Tzuyu clasps her hands together, delighted. He has a girlfriend, too. It’s then you realize you’ll be stuck with not just him, but her for the week. “You guys are so efficient. C’mon Kookie, let’s find some seats!” 

“I still gotta get my nametag,” he replies goodnaturedly, gesturing to you, “save us some seats in the front?” 

Tzuyu thinks nothing of it, squeezing his bicep before skipping off to the front row. Your eyes linger on her form, and it’s only then you realize how tall and intimidatingly pretty she looks in that plaid teddy bear brown skirt suit. You did not look that good when you were a budding undergrad. 

By this time, Krystal has taken all your other recruits from your line, regarding you with a raised brow. She’s fast with her attendance, so you know you don’t have much time. 

“I applied last minute,” Jungkook says, scratching his head, “was running out of options before graduation. I didn’t know you’d be one of my recruiters, though. Lucky me.” 

Jungkook and you never ended up keeping in contact, at least as of recent. A check-in message a few months in, a happy birthday or holiday greeting late at night. But two years later and those messages are automatic, with no feeling or personality. You never thought you’d see him again, no less in the city. 

“You just graduated with your masters, congrats,” you smile at Jungkook, although you’re sure the feigned emotion fails to reach your eyes, “IT Management, right?” 

“You remembered,” Jungkook brightens, reaching over to squeeze your shoulder, “you look good.” 

“Oh please—”  you laugh to yourself, shaking your head, “I just got off a flight and I ran over in a two-day old suit, I don’t even have makeup on,” you didn’t feel this way in the morning, you just rushed to do the bare minimum to be enough and ran over to the convention hall. But now in the presence of Jungkook who looks so handsome and clean-cut, you can’t help but feel a little slighted at the sudden reunion. 

“You’re always beautiful,” Jungkook exhales, and you clutch your clipboard closer to your chest. 

You cough, an excuse for him to stop touching your shoulder, “You should go inside, it’s gonna start soon. We can catch up later.”

“Wait—” you make a scrunched up face that Jungkook can’t catch, but right in Krystal’s view. You can tell she’s laughing at you internally with her devious grin. “I just wanted to say, Tzuyu isn’t my girlfriend. We’re just…” 

“Fooling around?” you didn’t mean for it to sound so sharp, but you wanted this conversation over. You have a job to do and Jungkook is your emotional barrier. 

You and Jungkook used to fool around. 

Jungkook winces, looking younger in his monkey suit. “I mean if you give me a chance to explain later—”  

“Nametag, let’s go newbie.” Krystal slaps on the sticker herself, a little too hard if she asked. She doesn’t even bother to write his full name, just a bright green Jeon JK, IT Management tacked on his breast pocket, clashing with the gold pocket square. 

“Sorry,” Jungkook tucks his tail in for now, bowing at you and Krystal as he scurries inside. 

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding in. Krystal doesn’t bother to comfort you or ask what’s up—not that you want her to, even though you do want a breather before you have to go up on that stage and explain the itinerary for a week. The only thing you can do is smooth out your skirt, brush away the flyaways on your hairstyle and plaster a company-paid smile on your face.

The autopilot switch is on throughout the rest of the morning. Not just because Jungkook’s around, but the new position has got you on livewire. You’re glad that you’re not wearing base makeup because you are absolutely melting with all the high beam lights all up in your face as you talk through the week’s activities. 

You could swear Jungkook clapped a little harder than most once you stopped talking, but maybe it’s because you’re not used to seeing Jungkook in the very front of a lecture. In fact, he was a very hard middle person, preferring not to show off his intelligence and let other people lead the discussion. Then again, it’s been two years, you don’t know how much he’s changed. 

Jessica caps off the seminar with a great kick-off, the happy hour. The recruitment team picks a four star restaurant under their hotel so the recruits can enjoy themselves before going off to the training facility for a week. 

And by training facility, you also mean yet another four-star hotel. You knew you made the right decision by joining this company because the benefits are impeccable, and value personal enjoyment just as much as they value work ethic. In the morning you and the recruits will be driving uptown to a private resort where there would be classes in the morning, and recoup in the evening. You’re very much looking forward to the infinity pool on the roof. 

The recruits are ushered out as soon as you’re done, and that’s when you step out of the shadows to clean up the chairs and the brochures left behind. Thankfully Jungkook is probably following the norm and going back to the hotel to freshen up before dinner. Once the room is completely empty, you rip off your blazer and let yourself relax. 

It’s going to be a long week. 

Jeon: where u @?

You: hotel room

Jeon: why? Thought we were all gonna have dinner together

You: nahhh, this night is for the recruits! You’ll be tired of our faces by the end of the week, enjoy it while you can 😉  have a good night

You sigh in contentment, relaxing further into the silk sheets. You just finished your skincare routine, letting some mindless drama play as the essences and serums sink into your skin. All you want is one Jungkook-free night. Tomorrow you’ll be stuck training him and Tzuyu for the week and you want to take tonight to emotionally prepare yourself. 

Your phone rings once more. 

Big Baddie Jessica Jung: krystal and i ordered takeout in the restaurant downstairs. Can u bring it to our  room? Plsssssss 

Little Baddie Krystal Jung: it’ll be faster if you do it, we even got u a lil somethin🍰🍰🍰

Taking in your outfit, you grimace. You’re dressed for bed, a large nightie with your hair pulled back and a little pink bunny tie headband on top. Can’t they get room service to send it up? You admire your boss but you don’t understand why she needs to display her power over and over, she already knows you’ll follow her to the ends of the earth. 

Quickly slipping into a pair of sneakers you run down the expanse of the hotel. It’s easy to spot where the recruits are, livin’ it up in the large restaurant that takes up half the space of the ground floor. Most of them are pretty drunk, hoping to sleep off the hangover on the four-hour bus ride. You have absolutely no judgement, two years ago you were in the same position. 

Thankfully you don’t have to go far into the restaurant, as the hostess immediately knows Jessica’s order. While you wait for her to go into the kitchen and get it you drum your fingers against the counter, hoping no one notices you. It’s akin to when you’re a teacher in a mall, hoping none of your students gawk at you in the middle of Victoria’s Secret. 

“Ah, well Jungkook and I aren’t official yet—but very soon.” 

Your ears perk up at the sweet voice. Tzuyu is leaning across the open bar next to the counter, sipping on a mango mojito. She’s dumped the blazer for the night, showing off her soft skin and slender arms with a sleeveless cream blouse. 

“Then where is he?” another recruiter asks, gesturing to the expanse of the lobby. 

“He’s not much of a party person,” Tzuyu shrugs, tipping back her drink. 

You scoff, plastering on a smile to the hostess as you grab your bags and walk as fast as you can out of the lobby. You’ve never felt more like an old hag until now. Sure, most of the recruits are younger than you, but seeing Tzuyu talk so freely about her relationship with Jungkook has you in a bit of a spiral. The day of graduation, you told Jungkook not to wait for you. Heck, you’re only interested in the idea of what you could’ve had with Jungkook. 

These thoughts only cloud you further as you jab the elevator buttons all the way up to the suites where you and the Jungs reside. You relax a little when you see a strawberry cheesecake sitting prettily on the top of their order, your name written on the label with a little heart. Hanging their bag on the door handle of their room, you make your way back to your suite. 

You freeze when you see a floppy-haired Jungkook roaming the hallway, looking like a clueless child hobbling around in slippers and wide eyes at any sparkly item that decorates the area. It doesn’t even look like he tried attending the happy hour tonight, dressed in an impossibly big heather grey sweatsuit that swallows his form. 

“Are you lost?” you ask tentatively, as if you’re talking to a toddler lost at the mall. 

Jungkook relaxes considerably at the sound of your voice, and he replies, “Was tryna find your room since you didn’t reply to my texts.”

“So… you decided to check all the rooms?” 

“Yep,” he pops the p with a smack of his lips, “I figured the recruiters would be far away from the party so I started at the top. Thankfully I got to Jessica’s room first. Didn’t have to knock on too many doors. Only one old man got annoyed at me.” 

“You’re crazy,” you chuckle, slipping in your keycard to let Jungkook in. 

“Fuck, this room all to yourself?” 

Jungkook doesn’t hesitate to kick his slides to a corner of the wall, flopping atop your bed and clutching your baby blue koala plush in his arms. The king sized bed is enough for his legs to stretch comfortably without falling off the edge, and he eagerly pads his feet against the soft fabric. 

It warms you to think that Jungkook is comfy enough to lay on your bed and hug your stuffed animals, a semblance of friends that you’ve missed for such a long time. Last year the team you worked for was great, you loved the people and even now you consider some of them friends. This year the team is a little smaller, and since your two other co-workers are sisters, it’s a little harder to nudge yourself in the direction of friendship. 

As soon as you sit down against the headboard, Jungkook’s eyes soften. Everything feels so different and the same. The threadbare pajamas that either of you haven’t had the heart to throw away since they’re so damn comfy, yet  your bodies are a little more worn and your eyes a little more droopier than usual. 

“So,” Jungkook bites his lip, not in the sexy way, but the nervous way, “about Tzuyu—”

“Jungkook, you don’t have to explain yourself,” you slump on your corner of the bed, regarding Jungkook with guilty eyes. “I really shouldn’t be feeling the way I’m feeling. It isn’t fair and I don’t want to jeopardize your internship.”

“And… what are you feeling?” 

“Dumb things.” 

“Your feelings aren’t dumb.”

“This time they are.”

“I’ve always shared my feelings, it’s unfair that you never want to share yours,” Jungkook sits up, criss-cross applesauce, pensive. “Maybe it’s my fault for not making you feel comfortable enough to share, but I feel like the reason why we never worked out was because we never tried hard enough to have a proper conversation.” 

How could you have missed all the indicators, all the good words, all the kindness Jungkook has given you that last semester? “You’re absolutely right,” you let your insecurities, your apprehensiveness, get in the way. You think in two years you’d do better to eradicate this kind of behavior, but lately you haven’t had many friends to express your feelings to. “Tell you what, I’ll work harder to express how I feel. No exchanges, no nothings. I owe you this.” 

“You owe me nothing,” Jungkook smiles, “I just think it would be nice to y’know, talk. As friends.” 

“Right, friends.”

“So, will you hear me out about Tzuyu?” 

“Let me open my cake,” you pull out your bag with the cheesecake, which thankfully has two spoons, “it seems like we’ll be having that kind of conversation.” 

Everyone is more amicable because of food. According to Jungkook, Tzuyu has a hardcore, ten-year plan for her twenties. After a couple of dates with Jungkook, Tzuyu whips him into the plan. Mentions that she’s well-bred and has a family reputation to uphold. Says IT Management is something completely desirable in a partner, that he’s sensible and wonderful and would like to be committed full-time. 

“And she talked to her parents about me and said that I’m a good prospect for marriage. Like I’m another pillar in her plan!” Jungkook cries, taking a monstrously sized bite of your cheesecake, wallowing away.

This is akin to sleepovers you’ve always wanted to have in high school, down to the food gorging. You can’t help but be fascinated, “So are you wrapped up in an engagement? Is this a scary rendition of Crazy Rich Asians?” 

“You just can’t turn a one-eighty like that on a fifth date,” Jungkook shakes his head, reeling at the emotional whiplash, “she’s really nice. Really organized, really perfect. It really intimidates me.”

“Is she what you reaaaally want?” you can’t help but ask, rolling your eyes at the excessive use of the word, and tamp down the pain in your stomach by eating a forkful of creamy cheesecake. 

“I don’t know!” Jungkook replies exasperatedly, “Obviously I’m worried since she wants to put a ring on it. I told her she needs to back off. Right after the seminar I said she had no right telling other people we’re boyfriend and girlfriend. She didn’t say much, just frowned and walked away.” 

You roll your eyes, scraping the leftover graham cracker crust from the edge of the plastic plate. “According to her, I heard you two are planning to make it official very soon.” 

His eyes widen, “I really bring girl trouble wherever I go, don’t I?” 

“Since I’ve known you,” you half-joke, putting away the plastic cutlery on the nightstand. 

You two sit in silence for a few moments, letting the television fill the room with mindless static about some sappy Hallmark movie. Tentatively, you land a hand on Jungkook’s knee. He looks down at your tiny fingers, giving his skin an experimental squeeze of comfort. 

“I don’t want her,” he finally says. 

“Okay,” you reply, “you won’t even have to talk to her if you don’t want to. I can arrange the groups this week so you don’t have to be around—”

“Give me one week,” his eyes flash to yours, dark and sharp.

“Jungkook. You have your determined face on,” it makes you sweat.  

“Because I’m determined to win you over, once and for all,” you eyes widen, and Jungkook visibly freezes, “was that too much? I’m kind of on an emotional high today. I didn’t expect to see you today and it kind of threw me into a loop. I thought I might be running into you once I started my internship but I didn’t think you’d be my recruiter. And then you went on that stage all bad-ass talking about work and you looked so gorgeous in your suit and I was so proud knowing you made it and IrealizedhowmuchImissedyou—” 

“Jungkook, slower,” you’re feeling a little woozy as well, equally overwhelmed. “You’re just saying this because you didn’t expect to see me—” 

“You’re deflecting, again.” 

“I’m scared, okay?” you blurt, throwing your hands in the air. “You’re right, this is all so sudden. So can’t we just start being friends and see if it takes us somewhere? You don’t have to win me over, just support me like I’ll support you.” 

“I’m sorry,” Jungkook moves up the bed, so he’s leaning against the headboard as well. His long legs stretch farther than yours, and it feels oddly domestic as you talk it out and stare at the television screen. “I’m just, worried I’m running out of time.” 

“I'm not going anywhere this time.” 

“I know,” Jungkook shakes his head, ridding himself of his torrid thoughts. Conceding, he gestures to the television, pulling out the remote under your pillow, “wanna watch television, or catch up?” 

You last about an hour until you knock out. However, Jungkook keeps you entertained up until that moment, as you exchange your lives and stresses. Everything meshes together, you’re not sure if it’s the charm that comes with late night talks, but you feel like you can talk to Jungkook about anything if given the time. You melt when he strokes your hair till the last minute, wishing you a goodnight and a promise of more. 

“Okay, I’ve gone over most of the work ethics in the manual,” you smile nervously when you see your glazed over recruits, nearly falling off their chairs. Even Krystal is bored out of her mind, discreetly playing with her phone in the back under her manual. Of course you’d get stuck with teaching the boring classes. “Any last minute questions before we head off for dinner?” 

Tzuyu shoots her hand up, “Are romantic relationships allowed in the workplace?” 

Jungkook promptly chokes on his water bottle. He looks up at you, panicked. Ignoring his terror, you paint on a thin smile towards the young woman, “Like I mentioned earlier, romantic relationships between employees are not frowned upon, so long as you’re not working under or over someone in the same department.” 

“Right, just wanted to make sure,” Tzuyu is all chipper smiles as she thanks you.  

If you were still twenty-one, you’d gag at the pointed look she sends Jungkook. They’re sitting diagonal from each other, and Jungkook makes a point to pretend to be interested in your lecture until the very end. 

You’re halfway done with recruitment week, and while you’re not shocked at how fast the week has gone by, you’re fairly disappointed that Jungkook and you haven’t had time to meet up in private. So far it’s been easy enough to keep your friendship (and past sexual relationship) a secret, but something dark and eager tells you how much you want more. The recruiters are eager to leave, all twenty-three of them grouping off and talking about what they want to eat for dinner. Everyone except a certain dark-haired fellow, who’s hair is currently bouncing off it’s styled coiff, wanting to return to it’s normal non-gelled self. 

“Kookie,” you raise a brow at the interaction, Tzuyu leaning over her chair to Jungkook’s, “wanna get dinner tonight?” 

Jungkook’s taking an excruciatingly long time to pack his things, raising a brow at her, “I’ve told you already, I don’t want to be involved in whatever plans you have.” 

“Oh-kay,” Tzuyu rocks back and forth on her oxford heels, pursing her magenta pink lips, “then why don’t we at least walk back to the hotel together? I really want to talk about some things that might change your mind.”

“Nothing will change my mind,” Jungkook’s determined face has been staying strong for the week, from the way he makes sure he’s first in your class to the simple “good morning” and “good night” texts you exchange. “Besides, I have a date tonight. And I really want to talk to the recruiters about a personal work matter, so can you please leave?”  

You try not to snort at how blatant Jungkook was being. You pretend to organize your folders, throwing whatever random notes you have in your bag for later. 

“A date,” she twitches,  “with who?” 

“Someone that doesn’t treat me like a stepping stone in her career path,” Jungkook deadpans, and that’s all it takes for Tzuyu to huff and walk away from the hall. 

You think Tzuyu is like a bug, relatively harmless, but someone who gets on your nerves. 

“A date, huh?” Krystal quotes, finally looking up from her phone. Her sharp, cat-eyes linger at the door, wondering if Tzuyu is going to pop out and try to drag Jungkook by the reins. Finally, she plants her stare between you and Jungkook. “So, you two fucking?” 

“Former fucking,” Jungkook supplies helpfully, and you jump off your podium to elbow him in the ribs, “ow—what?” 

“You just don’t tell Krystal we’re fucking!” 

“Former fucking,” he chastises, but the eyes he sends you are a little sultry, and you wonder if he’s thinking of fucking in the future. You reel yourself back, focusing on the third party.

But you anticipate that Krystal couldn’t care less, and you’re grateful for that. While a smaller work team means a smaller possibility of close work relationships, you do like the drama-free environment. “Like you said,” Krystal shrugs, slinging her briefcase over her shoulder, “romantic relationships in the workplace are not frowned upon.” 

You wring your hands between your bag when Krystal finally makes her getaway, and you look up at Jungkook. “So,” you smile wryly, “you have a date tonight, huh?” 

“With a pretty working woman,” he sighs dramatically, putting a hand over his chest, “that is, if she’ll have me.” 

“Consider yourself taken.”  

Jungkook and you sneak away to your suite once again. To your surprise, the suite is decorated in rose petals and a bottle of champagne sits in an ice bath on your bedside. A large pizza pie sits beautifully on your coffee table, and the television is playing lo-fi hip-hop. 

You feed Jungkook champagne-dipped strawberries as you gorge on the joy that is baked bread and cheese. 

And when he kisses you, it’s slow and sweet, like you have all the time in the world. 

It’s the last day of recruitment week, and all classes ended at noon so the interns can use all the resort’s amenities to the fullest. Many of the interns, including yourself, Jessica and Krystal, are on the rooftop celebrating a successful workweek. Staff and interns alike are buzzing around, eager to top off their weekend with some relaxation and sun. 

Jungkook is with his new team, conversing with other IT employees. You try not to stare too hard at your reignited flame, tipping back a cutely decorated glass of fruit. His arms ripple as he tips back the liquid. He’s wearing a tank top and you could swear his biceps have gotten meatier. Unfortunately you hold yourself back, after all the internship isn’t quite over and you still are a professional. 

At the end of the weekend you really have nothing to worry about, you know that. 

But Tzuyu? She irritating. 

“I just don’t understand,” Tzuyu suspects nothing of your budding relationship with Jungkook. You’re thankful for that because towards the end of the week, it was getting harder and harder to be subtle when you two send each other heart eyes from three meters away. 

Tzuyu sounds like she’s talking to herself, the way she stares into the infinity pool, despite the fact that her friends are surrounding her with rapt attention. You’re a cabana away from her, sipping languidly at your drink while Jessica and Krystal nap next to you. Even though you can’t see Tzuyu, you can practically feel her pout emanating through the fabric that separates you two. Despite the fact that she’s been offered a great intern position given her degree and experience, she’s still upset. For her, is that not the most important part of this whole week? 

“Jungkook’s really not that great if he’s going to turn me down like that,” Tzuyu seethes. You should write up her nonsense in a book and publish it, really. “Why waste time when he has the whole package right in front of him?” 

It’s then you realize why you’ve been so torn, so strung up and wound tight all these years. Just like college, all shy and hesitant to take a step forward while Jungkook was ten steps ahead, you were worried. You let other people’s thoughts stop you from making the leap, girls like Tzuyu that never meant to intimidate you, but you let their presence get up in your head and control the nonexistent hierarchy. 

But two years later, and that doesn’t matter. It never mattered. Jungkook is no longer the all-star lacrosse player, but what remains is his heart, full and willing. 

Everything Tzuyu just said was… wrong. Irrevocably, inexplicably messed up. But the idea of “wasting time” does strike a chord within you. Are you wasting time? At this point, your feelings of each other are pretty clear. What are you two waiting for, again? 

You thought Krystal was sleeping, considering her sunhat sitting atop her face, but once she hears you packing away your bag she whistles, “Go get ‘em, tiger.” 

Sending a quick text to Jungkook, you make a beeline for your destination. You don’t even bother looking for him in the crowd. 

You: meet me by the elevator at the very end of the lobby. 

Not a minute passes by when Jungkook joins you at said elevator. He has two glasses of champagne in his hands, and offers one to you, “tired of the party?” he asks.  

You clink drinks, easily tipping yours back. “It’s not our thing,” you declare with a small smile. Jungkook's eyes soften, glancing back and forth between your face and the soft pleats of your marigold sundress. His hair is pushed back, sticky from sweat and chlorine, dark bangs hanging over the shaved sides of his head. You turn your head slightly as you wait for the elevator, biting your lip as you're sorely reminded of how sexy Jungkook looked at the dive pool half an hour ago. 

The elevator dings, and it’s wide enough for you to slip in at the same time. You put your champagne glass in the corner of the elevator for now, hoping you don’t accidentally step on it. In closed quarters, you can smell the slight tang of chlorine coming from Jungkook, combined with his own brand of musk. 

Jungkook looks younger tonight, happier. Having just finished graduate school and working towards a full-time gig, another chapter in his life has started. His hair is no longer in that tight-whipped coiff he struggled all week to maintain, loosened in its natural wave due to the pool water and heat. His cheeks are a little ruddied and plump, a sign he’s been enjoying the food this week. 

The door barely closes when you get it out, pulling at his hand to face you.

“Jungkook, I like you,” you blurt, and his eyes bug out considerably. Out of reflex, his hand sharply squeezes yours. “You don’t have to say anything, because you’ve been saying everything for the majority of our relationship. I really like you, I really liked you back then too. You’re still so sweet, and loving, and smart and I’ve just been too dumb and insecure to—” 

Jungkook seals your confession away with a desperate kiss, and you turn into a pile of mush at the contact. Relief seeps into your bones, sings into your system. When he pulls away, he looks serious. He doesn’t let you get far, and clutches your face between his two hands so you can’t turn your head. Your soft cheeks fill between his fingers, warm and cradled. 

“Never call yourself that,” Jungkook exhales, regarding you with firm eyes, “you’re beautiful, and intelligent, and the person I want.” 

“I don’t wanna take it slow anymore,” you mumble against his lips, leaning in so that you can barely nip at the pink skin. “Want you now, need you now.” 

“You have me now,” Jungkook agrees, and as soon as the elevator dings open to your floor, he scoops you up into his arms. 

By all means it’s not graceful, he’s clutching you like a baby with his hands over your butt as he jiggles you all the way to your front door. Clinging onto him like a koala, you press kisses to his cheeks as he leads you to your room. You laugh and giggle like teenagers, as he fumbles between your breast to grab the card key that’s nestled between your bra. It’s warm in his hand as he swipes it through the reader, pushing you inside. 

“Is it bad that I’m kinda turned on by the fact you got my key out of my boob?” you joke, although the contact of his rough fingers against your breast is a feeling well missed. 

“Is it bad that I’m always turned on when you lecture in seminars?” Jungkook retorts, kicking the door closed with his slipper-clad foot as he walks you to the bed. “Fuck, I can hear you talk about insurance benefits all day.” 

“Didn’t know my sex appeal extended that way—oh fuck—” 

Your vibrant marigold sundresses provides easy access to Jungkook as he throws you onto the mattress, your skirt billowing over your waist as he makes quick work to expose more of your skin. 

“No more talking, more loving,” he’s crazed, doesn’t hesitate to move your bikini bottoms to the side as he rubs lovingly at your long-lost bud, “need to fuck you, now. It’s been so fucking long.” 

“Kook,” his breath is warm against your already sopping cunt, and you lift your hand to run through the strands of his messy hair. It only takes one firm tug and you’re able to pull him up by the root of his hair, cranberry juice tinted lips with a faint sheen because he couldn’t help himself to have a little taste of you. “Baby, let me touch you. Let me show you how much I want you," you coo with a pout, hands trailing over the drawstrings of his trunks.

You can see how much Jungkook wants to say yes. His eyes glow with the possibility, bright and wanting in the afternoon sunlight. The image of him shoving his cock deep into your throat, so far that you can taste it in every crevice of your mouth. Your nails gripping into his ass as you go deeper, tears pricking your eyes as cum seeps out of your pretty lips. 

But he firmly shakes his head, fingers doing the devil’s work as he eases a digit in you. A little noise of protest bubbles in your throat, but it soon dies out as soon as he finds the right spot to reduce you to mush. 

“Next time,” he exhales against the juncture between your thigh and pelvis, picking up the pace and adding another finger, “if you touch me, I’ll cum right then n’there. This is enough for me, you’re enough.” 

So you let him have what he wants. You’ll make it up to him in the morning, and the day after, and the day after. You shed your clothes, the sundress extra forgiving as it slides off your body, revealing a swimsuit that hasn’t even touched the pool. You feel a little self-conscious as he drinks you in after so long, but he quickly shucks off his clothes to match your state of nakedness. 

You remember how you tiptoed around your first night with Jungkook, taking great care to make sure it was fleeting, how dark the room was as you let your pleasure take over your senses. Two years later and the sun is setting, gold bleeding through your sheets and illuminating the room. There's no need to hide.

“I must say, we’ve both kept it tight,” Jungkook teases with a wink, squeezing your hips so he can change positions. 

You silently agree, your fingers slipping across the washboard of his waist. 

“Mm, and still so fuckin’ cute,” Jungkook marvels as he pulls you up on his lap. Your whole body is flushed with want, one hand squeezing your breasts while the other plays with the curls of hair that lead to your sopping wetness. You glide your core over Jungkook’s stomach, sighing as you take note of the abs that clench under your heat and his hot member that rubs between your ass. 

It’s a tight fit when you finally sink down on him, but the burn only fuels your desire as he stretches you wide. His grip is helpful as he guides you through the motions. It’s been awhile since you’ve been this physical with someone, and it’s almost comical when you both sigh in contentment at the contact. 

“I’ve missed this,” you mumble, biting into his shoulder as he thrusts up. 

“Mm, it feels different, right?” Jungkook hums, keeping a slow pace. The drag is wonderful, and you know that he’s trying to prolong the moment. He reaches for your head, presses his forehead to yours as he speaks, “you’re mine now, right? For real.” 

“I’m all yours, Jungkook,” you press kisses everywhere. No need to hide anymore. You bleed love into every kiss, to his jawline, the little freckles across his chin, his lips. “This is romantic and all, but I really want you to dick me down. Which is why you need to go a little faster, you sap.” 

Jungkook scoffs, “A pillow princess is what you are.” 

He stops moving, and you two sink further into the mattress without its springs bringing you back up. The both of you are acutely aware of how wet you both are, your combined arousals seeping between your seams and dripping onto Jungkook’s thighs. But the young man simply relaxes against the headboard, baiting you. 

“Kook,” you whine, clenching against his member. Your hot walls have a mind of their own, unable to stifle their desire. Sweat lines Jungkook’s brow as he tries his hardest not to move, just simply be. 

“Tell me how much you want me, princess,” the pet name has you clenching harder, and you pout. 

“Baby,” you whine, leaning forward to whisper in his ear. There’s no one in the room, and you’re sure no one is on this floor because everyone’s on the rooftop, but the words you’re about to say are for Jungkook and Jungkook only, “please, I want you to pound me into this mattress until I can’t walk anymore. I want to cry out your name so everyone can hear I’m yours. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” you nip at his lobe, and let your thumb nick at the simple silver rings that adorn his ear. You hear a click of his teeth, indicating the clench of his jaw as his muscles flex around your body, "I want you to fill me with your cum until I’m eating it, and—and—oh Kook!” 

Your words aren’t enough to distract you from his large dick sitting prettily between your folds, and you’re suddenly cumming, all by the mere thought of what’s to happen. You’re shuddering in his arms, and Jungkook soothes you by running his fingers over the spine of your back, distracting you from the utter mess you’re making on the sheets. 

“Such a good girl,” Jungkook coddles you, stroking your hair, “can my good girl take it?” 

“Y-yes, Kook,” you nod eagerly, fighting the overstimulation as he nudges you off his lap. You’re pliable, as Jungkook sets up the pillows for you to rest comfortably as you get on your elbows and knees, “your good girl.” 

You shudder as your bare pussy starts to feel cold, immediately missing the warmth Jungkook can provide. You can practically feel his hot gaze burning in your back, his large palm squeezing your ass as he marvels at how ready and eager you are for him. 

“It’s so easy to slip inside,” Jungkook rubs your nectar across the head of his cock, swirling around your engorged skin as he slips right inside. You both moan at the stretch, “Finally, my adorable baby, you like this? You like getting pounded like the dirty girl you really are?” 

“Mm, yes!” you squeal, clutching onto the feather down pillows for dear life as Jungkook displays his strength, one hand gripping your hips as the other weaves itself into your hair. It’s a delicious mix of pleasure and pain, and the lewd sounds of each other’s juices and his balls against your ass echoing in the room. 

“Y-yeah,” despite his power, his thrusts are sloppy, and you know he’s almost at the edge, “and I like you, so so much. I want to make you cum everyday, make you happy and—mph—” he gives up on talking, focusing entirely on his destination. 

“Cum, baby,” you urge, melting when his one hand comes to thread with your own, “fill me up with you.” 

He flips you on your back, and you finally see how desperate Jungkook is to cum. His eyes are glassy, filled with emotion as he strokes himself to completion. Your hand reaches up to cup his damp face, and that’s when you feel him loosen. Hot, pearly strings cling to your pussy, decorating your skin in his essence. Your fingers immediately reach down to swirl the cum between your folds, and Jungkook groans at the picture, immediately throwing your hands to the side to kiss you senseless. 

There’s so much pouring between the two of you, affection, the feeling of being cherished, so much that you can feel the whole world reducing to the two of you. 

“All mine,” he whispers to himself, as if he still can’t believe it. And then, he puts up a poker face as he leans into you, resting his head gently on your breasts, “I knew I only needed a week.”

You narrow your eyes, flicking lightly at his forehead. You’re sticky, sweaty, and covered in cum and while you’re exhausted, the built in jacuzzi in your washroom looks very enticing right now. “Jungkook, this happened naturally. I said we would try as friends first and we did. We just so happened to escalate pretty fast.” 

“I don’t think it was that fast,” Jungkook nuzzles his face into your skin, “it’s been two years since college. Being popular did do a number on our relationship, but we caught up." 

“You were popular-ish,” you roll your eyes, teasing him. His face falls, and you can’t help yourself. Your hands reach over to cup his cheeks, and you happily squish the supple, pouty flesh. He’s adorable. “Kim Taehyung though? Park Jimin? Absolute heartthrobs I couldn’t stand to be near them—ah!” 

Jungkook seems to read your mind, lifting you bridal style to drag you over to the bathroom where the marble jacuzzi sits tauntingly. The stone is ice cold as he brings you both inside, immediately turning on the nozzles to fill it with steaming hot water. You find the tiny bottle of lavender suds, spilling the soap in an arc. His legs slip over yours, cradling you so that your back is pressed against Jungkook’s chest. 

“Being popular never mattered,” Jungkook shakes his head, pressing a kiss to your jaw, “I realized the only person who I really needed to notice me was you.” 

bonus. 

You wake Jungkook up the next morning with your lips wrapped around his cock, fresh cherry balm rubbing down the thick veins until he's cumming down your throat. 

"Wow," Jungkook whistles, licking his lips at the sight of you sucking the arousal from your thumb. He huffs against the pillow, eyes darting to the open organza window, letting in the early morning light. The rooftop of a multi-star hotel, white Egyptian cotton seats, a full time job on the way and waking up in the most blissful way possible. 

"I have a proposal," you crawl on top of him like a koala, hooking your thighs between his blanket clad body. 

"I do," he replies instantly, looking straight at you with droopy puppy eyes.

"Not that kind," you slap his chest, "where are you living once orientation is over?" 

"Mm, there's a boarding house near a local translation. It's probably an hour commute? Not too bad." 

"So, I just leased a townhouse last month," you bite your lip, tucking your head between his neck to hide your embarrassment, "I was gonna rent out the spare room and put an advert in the paper but…"

"I do."

"I said it isn't a marriage proposal."

"Asking you to live with me is basically a marriage proposal."

"There will be no benefits," you sit up, wagging a finger in his face, "you'll be paying rent and half the utilities. And you will be doing all the laundry." 

"Sure," Jungkook replies loftily, squeezing your ass, "you're benefit enough." 

[beyondspaceandstars]

Alone For The Holidays

Part 2: Christmas

Relationship: Bucky Barnes x Reader Warnings: N/A Summary: Neighbors!AU - After you and Bucky spent Thanksgiving together, your relationship began to blossom and Bucky brings up the idea of spending Christmas Day together. A/N: as promised here is the bonus christmas part of Alone For the Holidays! read part one here if you’re interested :)

Part 1 | Masterlist

Following your Thanksgiving dinner, you and Bucky went on a number of official dates. They were unlike anything you ever could’ve fantasized. He was so kind, gentle, always attentive, and a wonderful listener. Your dates had been simple — trips to coffee shops or aimlessly walking around the mall — but with Bucky by your side, every moment felt like you had hit the jackpot.

There was just something about him that made you fall even harder, something you didn’t think was possible. Your crush on him had already burned so bright and fast but now, with your relationship with him, it was love burning between you two.

But for as excited as you were about your new relationship when the holiday of Christmas came lingering, you got a bit nervous. Would Bucky actually want to spend Christmas with you? You two were yet to discuss any plans you had. While you had nowhere to be December 25th, you couldn’t say the same for Bucky. You were just itching to know what he had planned. And even more eager to plan something for you two. Maybe it was selfish, but you had enjoyed Thanksgiving with him and didn’t see why that shouldn’t continue into Christmas.

You tried to casually bring it up one day while you two were going on your regular stroll through the mall. Being so cold in the city, you had found browsing storefronts was quite nice. Not to mention that many of the window displays were decked out for the holiday, making Christmas a natural conversation topic.

At least, you hoped.

"That’s a really cute snowman," you said as you pointed to a candle store that had stacked white candles into a (very lumpy) snowman. It was completed with black candles for the eyes and buttons along with an orange one acting as the nose.

Bucky chuckled and intertwined your hands. "It is sort of charming."

You felt your neck get warm as you moved onto the next store. So far, so good. He liked snowmen so that was nice but you hadn’t gotten the right confidence to casually bring up spending Christmas together. You had dreamed of having a nice, traditional Christmas again.

You two passed by an exceptionally cute display depicting reindeers having a snowball fight. You awed.

"Those reindeers are just adorable, don’t you think?" You asked Bucky, your eyes getting wide, expectantly. Bucky tilted his head, thinking for a second as he analyzed the store window. You could practically feel the moment the ex-assassin caught on. It came at pretty much no surprise to you. Over your past few weeks together he had proven to still be as sharp as a tack despite being free from his past.

Bucky turned towards you, suspicion was written on his face. "Everything okay, doll?"

You felt your face get unbelievably warm. "Y-Yeah, why?"

"You keep asking me if I like Christmas characters."

"Well, I’m just checking. You know some people don’t—,"

"I like Christmas and the characters that come with it," Bucky said, a small smile forming on his lips. "I’d probably love Christmas if I could spend it with you."

You stopped dead in your tracks. What? How had he figured it out? Your jaw went slack as you were now seriously blushing.

"I-I didn’t say…"

Bucky let out a chuckle. "I know, honey, but I had a feeling you were working up to something." He paused. His cheeks were now getting red, too. "And I wanted to ask if you’d like to spend Christmas together."

Your wide-eyed shock turned into a pleased smile. "Really?"

"Of course," he said. "So… Do you… Do you want to? We can… I don’t know, how do you celebrate Christmas?"

"Well, when I was younger I vaguely remember my parents used to drink eggnog while we watched Christmas movies after opening presents."

You swore you saw Bucky’s eyes twinkle at that. Suddenly, you started backpedaling, already suspecting what he was planning. "I- But that does not mean presents, Bucky, I swear—,"

"Too late," he laughed with a shrug before taking your hand in his once again. You too continued your stroll around the mall but now instead of just a casual day out, your brain was wrecked with thoughts of what to get Bucky. Because Lord knows that little shit was going to blow it all out of the waters.

*** As predicted, Bucky arrived at your apartment door the morning of Christmas Day with gifts. They didn’t appear to be anything large and extravagant, more like stocking stuffers, but that didn’t matter. The fact he went out of his way to buy you anything just made your heart sing. You only hoped your gifts to him would stack up to what he had for you.

You had had an interesting time trying to get him a present. What do you give a man who was raised decades ago but now has to navigate life in the 2020s? You were eventually pleased with what you had settled on but you secretly have been praying since the day you bought them that he’d find them as endearing as well.

"Merry Christmas," Bucky said as he entered your apartment. You smiled as you watched him carefully place your gifts under your small Christmas tree.

"Merry Christmas," you responded before heading back into the kitchen. You were preparing a little breakfast for you two. Something simple: a spread of eggs, bacon, toast, and sausage. All freshly prepared. You hadn’t served Bucky a frozen meal since that Thanksgiving afternoon where it all began.

You heard Bucky enter the kitchen behind you. Seconds later, two arms were wrapped around your waist and he was placing his head on your shoulder. It was an incredibly comfy position, mostly thanks to the fluffy holiday sweater he wore. You had on one as well, but for some reason feeling his engulfed you, making you melt.

"Smells good," Bucky commented as you flipped a piece of bacon. You smiled to yourself, bashfully.

"Thank you," you said. "It should be ready soon. I know breakfast wasn’t exactly on the plans but who can resist Christmas breakfast?"

Bucky chuckled and unwound himself from you. You just about whimpered at the loss of contact until you realized he had abandoned his post to start setting the kitchen island to eat. You could’ve cried, as silly as that sounds. How did you get so lucky? How did you get this domesticity in your life?

"I don’t think anyone can resist Christmas breakfast," Bucky said. "Especially if it’s made by you."

Your neck was getting warm. That was another thing you loved — he appreciated your cooking efforts. He found ways to appreciate almost every little thing about you.

Once the bacon was fried up, you began plating the food. "I never did ask," you began as you scooped eggs into a bowl, "how do you celebrate Christmas?"

Bucky was already situated at the kitchen island when you turned to place the food in front of your plates. He had helped himself to a cup of coffee you had just brewed. He looked a bit lost in thought as he watched the steam rise from your "But first, coffee!" novelty mug.

In fact, he seemed more than just a bit zoned out, you realized as you were able to serve him food without him really flinching. You suddenly felt bad for asking such a question. But then again, you had asked him about Thanksgiving and he responded to that just fine?

It felt like an eternity but he finally started talking once you sat beside him at the island. A familiar feeling washed over you.

"Christmas was typically a big affair in my household. Even bigger than Thanksgiving." Bucky let out a breathy laugh. "The whole family, cousins and all, would get together and we’d exchange gifts. Mom used to make the biggest spread for Christmas lunch. And she… She’d always invite Steve. For all the Christmases I can remember, Steve was there. After lunch, she’d usher us outside so she could clean up. Someone, usually me, would start a snowball fight and then that was it. The whole block got in on it."

The way he talked about back then with such wonder yet familiarity amazed you. You could practically feel like you were there. Just picturing the snowy New York sidewalks being the backdrop to some naughty teens’ snowball fight was incredible.

But your heart also got stuck on how his voice sounded when he mentioned Steve. Steve, the best friend he wasn’t seeing this Christmas. It was like it had finally dawned on him what today was and you felt a bit guilty about that.

"That’s… That sounds really nice, Buck," you said before turning to your plate of food. You took a bite of eggs. "About Steve, I-I’m sorry—,"

Bucky immediately began shaking his head before you could get the apology out. What you were apologizing for, you weren’t even sure.

"There’s nothing to be sorry for," he insisted. "I’m incredibly happy here, spending this day with you. It’s perfect."

You forced yourself not to playfully roll your eyes. "We haven’t even eaten breakfast yet. Here you go again declaring things lovely and perfect prematurely."

"When I look at you and take in everything around me in this moment, I know I’m not jumping the gun."

That declaration made your heart skip a couple of beats. You thought you were going to pass out. You directed your attention back to the food to keep yourself from just tackling him in a hug. How did he manage to get everything so right? Maybe he was your perfect Christmas gift.

You two soon fell into a comfortable silence and finished your hearty breakfast. You shared little conversation here and there. It was nice and simple. That was all you really wanted, really. A simple day in with the man you were quickly becoming to love. The crush has morphed exponentially, clearly.

One dishwashing session and a couple of coffees later, you began getting items out for eggnog. Bucky looked at the bottle of whiskey sitting on the counter, suspiciously.

“Would you like your eggnog spiked or not spiked?” You asked.

Bucky frowned. “What? It’s like ten in the morning.”

“Okay, and? It’s Christmas! Jesus birthday!" You waved your arms around dramatically. "We gotta celebrate somehow. I think it’d be incredibly rude if he saw us drinking regular eggnog.”

Bucky looked like he wanted to fight you more on it but eventually, he gave in. "Alright. Hand me some spiked eggnog."

After the drinks were made, you two moved into the living room. Bucky and you eyed the gifts, silently communicating what was coming next. You felt like a little kid all giddy from just the idea of getting a gift as Bucky handed you your boxes. Once you both had your corresponding presents, you made yourself comfortable in front of the tree.

You sipped your eggnog and motioned towards Bucky. "I insist you open one of yours first."

"Really?" Bucky chuckled uneasily. "Nothing like putting the pressure on."

You giggled, probably thanks to the nice helping of whiskey in your eggnog. "No, I’m just kind of excited for you to open it. Or maybe that’s nervousness I’m feeling. I can’t tell the difference right now."

Bucky picked a gift and gave it a little shake. It didn’t rattle but that was good — it wasn’t meant to. Slowly, Bucky peeled back the wrapped paper and you held your breath. Once it was all off, he opened the box and peeked inside. At first, he looked a little confused and you started to get nervous… But then a smile began creeping upon his lips and his eyes shined with an unreadable but happy emotion.

"An e-reader?" Bucky asked as he took the device out of its box. He ran his hand over the sleek screen and turned it over, weighing it, as if contemplating. You couldn’t help the smile that was now forming on your face. You were actually excited, you finally determined.

You had settled on an e-reader for one of his gifts after seeing the rows and rows and rows of books at his place. It had been hard to ignore all of them in his apartment one night after you two went out for dinner. There were books of all kinds but mainly fantasy and sci-fi. He had new editions, old editions. Hardcover and paperback. Used and fresh. You know he loved reading and treasured his books but maybe this would be a bit more convenient, especially when traveling.

"Is… Is it okay?" You finally asked. It was a borderline dumb question but you needed to hear the verbal affirmation. "I just saw all the books you had and thought maybe this would be useful. You can download so many books and carry it wherever you go. Your whole library could sit on there if you wanted, really. I hope I didn’t overstep or- or something—,"

Bucky cut you off by placing a hand on your knee. You tensed up at the touch, eyes wide as you watched him. He looked so…grateful.

"Honey, this is amazing," he said. "Thank you so much."

You let out a sigh of relief. "I’m so glad you like it."

Bucky gave you a quick peck on the cheek before putting his present back in the box. He motioned towards your gifts. "Your turn, doll."

You looked at the gifts in front of you. You decided to go with the one to your left first. It was a bit heavy, surprisingly. You also gave it a shake but didn’t hear much. Bucky was watching you closely. He looked a bit funny but you had no doubt you appeared a bit wild while watching him open his first gift. Just as slowly as he had, you pulled back the wrapping paper only to be greeted by a brown box. Once you got through the tape, you found… a bottle open. One of those easy, electronic bottle openers meant for more efficient wine serving.

You let out a joyous laugh at realizing what your present was. "Bucky, this is too fancy, I could never!"

Bucky shrugged. "I think it’s perfect for you and all those bottles of wines I saw at Thanksgiving."

You bit your lip. "You saw that?" When he nodded, you sighed, "I guess guilty as charge. This is wonderful, Bucky, thank you so much. It definitely will be put to good use."

"That’s all I ask for."

You placed the bottle opener back in the box then clapped your hands together. "Alright, mister, onto your next one."

Bucky opened his second gift with the same delicacy as the first. But when the gift revealed itself and Bucky started processing what it was you swore he was going to cry. Or laugh, maybe. There was a bit of a combination of both happening in front of you.

Eventually, Bucky said, "Polisher?"

"Okay, maybe it’s dumb—,"

"No, it’s clever."

"Whatever," you said as you rolled your eyes with the widest grin. "I just noticed that sometimes  you clean your arm, the, um, metal one, with just a rag and I don’t know. Maybe I stupidly thought you’d like some polisher to really clean it. Make it all nice. Is that ridiculous? It’s kind of ridiculous. I really butchered this didn’t I—,"

Bucky cut you off this time by placing a kiss on your lips. A real, passionate, lovely kiss. You moaned in surprise as his lips moved with yours. You had never anticipated a make-out in front of a Christmas tree but it was insanely perfect, to use Bucky’s term.

He broke the kiss after what felt like an eternity later. "It’s not ridiculous. It’s thoughtful and useful." He paused, another smirk was coming up on his lips. "It’s also kind of funny but that’s what makes it great, too."

You blushed. "Well, I’m glad I did okay with the gifts then."

Bucky nodded then pushed your other present to you. It was light and thin, about the size of a card. "Your turn, again."

You didn’t bother shaking it and just dove into unwrapping it. Your excitement wavered a little bit when you read what it was. A certificate for a cooking class… A cooking class? Was he trying to tell you something? You looked up at Bucky, silently asking what this was.

He must’ve seen the panic on your face because he immediately began explaining. "No, no, it’s not a cooking class as in like you’re bad at cooking — God why did I do this? — If you read on it’s a couple’s cooking class. It’s for us to do together."

You scanned over the certificate and realized he was right. "Oh—,"

"It’s so we can learn to cook together as, like, a team, or something…" Bucky admitted shyly. "I just didn’t want you to have to do all the work in the kitchen. I want us to do it together."

You sighed. "Oh, Bucky… This is too thoughtful. I love it, thank you so much." And truly you did, once the confusion was resolved. This was going to be so nice, you just knew it. You looked at the certificate again and noted the date of the class. It was on Valentine’s Day. You could’ve exploded right then and there.

"I’m glad you enjoyed all your presents," Bucky said. "I’ll admit, I scrambled with them. I just… I wanted it to be good. To be nice. Because that’s what you deserve. A nice Christmas."

Scratch that, you were going to explode. "Being here with you is also enough for me. Thank you, Bucky. You were right. Today is perfect."

You both looked like you were going to cry which made you laugh to yourself. To prevent either of you from just bawling your eyes out, you began cleaning up and told Bucky to pull up Netflix for a Christmas movie.

You had just finished shoving the wrapping paper in the garbage when Bucky called out. "Doll, I almost forgot, I have one more gift for you."

Your brows furrowed in confusion as you went back into the living room. Bucky was standing by the tree. How The Grinch Stole Christmas was queued up on the television.

"Another gift?" You asked. "But, I-I don’t have another one for you."

Bucky shook his head. "Not necessary. Besides, this one is more like a gift for both of us."

You didn’t know if that made you more confused or unreasonably hot. "Okay…"

He motioned towards your Christmas tree. "Notice anything different?"

Your eyes raked over the tree. You had decorated it yourself and while it wasn’t very show-stopping, you were still proud of it. You had bought it a bit impulsively one winter and filled it with the most generic silver ornaments. That’s how you were able to notice the one ornament that hadn’t come in the bulk box you had bought years ago. No, this one depicted two snowmen standing on a hill. Beneath it read "First Christmas together" in the loveliest font. Someone had taken it upon themselves to write your name on one snowman and Bucky’s on the other. It was hard to stop the waterworks now.

"Bucky, you didn’t…" You mumbled in between sniffles. Bucky threw his arm around you, pulling you into him.

"I know we haven’t been together long but I still this was monumental enough for its own ornament," he explained. "Even figured out how to use that Etsy site to buy it. I just thought it’d be special because while I cherish this Christmas, I want many more with you."

"Thank you," you said because, honestly, you didn’t know what else to say. You were at a complete loss of words for how lucky you had gotten. Maybe the cycle of lonely holidays was breaking. "I want all your Christmases."

Bucky let out a light laugh at your sentiment. "More than happy to give them to you, doll," he said. "More than happy."

[ptergwen]

from one kid to another

w/c: 6.0k

warnings: mentions of drinking, lots of swearing, implied smut, and angst at times

summary: it was a mistake, a beautiful one that you didn’t make on your own

a/n: this genuinely is my favorite thing i’ve ever written :,) i say that a lot but this time i mean it, it’s really special i think and i so so so hope y’all do too <3 enjoy my loves

-

there’s only one thing in life that testing positive for is actually positive.

depending on the situation, obviously. yours isn’t ideal, or planned or a blessing or whatever people say. it’s a gigantic mistake that you didn’t realize you made until a minute ago.

you’d noticed something was wrong when your time of the month came and all you experienced was the symptoms. cramps, cravings, everything except your actual period. as everyone is pretty much taught to do, you ran to the closest drug store for a pregnancy test. what the hell else could it be? you messed around a few weeks ago, so there’s a possibility.

your heart felt like it was going to explode out of your chest the whole time you waited for the results. you’d thought of calling tom over for support, but there are a couple of reasons why you couldn’t do that. you realized you made the right decision when your timer for the test went off.

two red lines. you’re pregnant. you’re pregnant, and your best fucking friend is the father.

where do you go from here?

the test falls from your hand and hits the floor with a mocking clank. you slide down until your back is against the bathtub. well, you’re fucked. what an ironic word choice.

the fact that you aren’t ready in the slightest to be a parent when you’re still growing up yourself is one thing. it’s another that this could ruin the most important relationship you’ve ever had.

no, tom won’t be mad. he’s never once fought with or even raised his voice at you. in your times of need, he’s been the one to uplift you and kiss your puffy cheeks dry. no matter how he takes this, you know it won’t be out on you. he is half responsible.

but, with how you left things the last time you spoke, you’re not sure you’ll be able to get past it.

tom is alarmingly good at hiding how he truly feels. you always tease him that it’s because he’s a gemini. he’ll come back with shut up, i’m an actor and stick his nose in the air to give you the full image. in all seriousness, it does take a toll on how well he can communicate.

you’ve seen it in small ways, like when he brings you along for press days and uses unenthusiastic smiles to cover up his yawns. how he’ll be polite in a conversation with people he’d rather not speak to, then mumble about it once you’re home. he tries to put forward the “appealing” parts of himself even though he’s more than them.

tom’s biggest communication issue is that he’s been in love with you since year nine and hasn’t said a word about it. you’ve yet to figure that one out.

you two became friends while tom was starring in billy elliot. his schedule was so scattered between shows and school, so he struggled to balance both. he often had to stay late for extra help on the lessons. you’d also been there a few times. you worked better in the classroom, and he was grateful he didn’t have to be alone with the teacher.

most kids made fun of tom for his interest in theater, to his face and behind his back. not you. you thought it was just incredible that someone in your own classes worked at the west end. you’d told him on your way home one night.

he’d heard you before he saw you. “you’re tom, right?” you asked from behind him, the two of you making your way through the hall. the question sounded friendly, and it wasn’t every day kids were nice to him. tom stopped walking so you could catch up. “yes, and you are?” you gave him a small smile, books clutched to your chest. he instantly returned it.

“y/n. i heard you’re in billy elliot?” you laughed at your understatement, then corrected yourself. “that you are billy elliot, i mean. that’s so cool.” “oh, i am. thank you,” he chuckled back, a full grin taking over his face. you were both walking again, you by tom’s side. “i was hoping to come see you soon.” your voice got quieter as you told him, like you were nervous.

tom never had much luck with girls, not at this point in his life. this was an opportunity to change that. at the very least, to make a new friend. he offered something you said yes to without a beat of hesitation. “what if i got you the tickets?”

from then on, you began talking during class and not only when it ended. tom really knew how to keep the conversation going, telling story after story that left you laughing so much your teacher would shush you. you’d eventually moved to hangouts at either of your houses. harrison came into the mix at some point, the three of you forming your own group.

the difference between tom and harrison was that while harrison linked with other girls, tom was only interested in you. he’d gotten a crush on you pretty fast, if he was being honest. it might have been your shared sense of humor or the way you said his name.

thomas, when he was being cheeky. tommy, which took the place of a pet name. even regular tom. that might have been his favorite. he loved how it rolled off your tongue. he loved, and still loves, you.

you’d gone to all of tom’s performances you possibly could, the ones for school theater included. you also gave him the push to take his talents to hollywood. tom was afraid he wasn’t cut out for the big screen, that he needed more practice and experience first. you told him that if this was what he wanted to do, he had to start somewhere. why wait?

tom then landed his first movie role in the impossible at the age of fifteen. he’d received tons of praise and almost gotten nominated for an academy award, all because you convinced him to audition. you played a huge part in keeping him grounded when he was between films, and caught him up on whatever schoolwork he’d missed.

you practically zoomed to tom’s house when he was announced as the next spider-man. you’d been constantly refreshing every social media platform marvel was on since tom became a finalist for the part. that process was probably the most difficult experience he’s ever gone through. you’d know, having heard all about it from tom.

the two of you celebrated along with the rest of tom’s family that night. you kept giving him little proud of you squeezes on his shoulder or knee. tom is eternally indebted to you for being the most supportive of everything he does.

he of course sends the support right back. although he went down the movie star path, acting wasn’t for you. you’d gone off to university and studied hard as hell and aced all your shit. tom quizzed you on material whenever you needed. he wanted to help you somehow, and this was all you’d let him do.

he’d offered to pay off your loans and any other expenses necessary because he had the money to do that now. you refused every single time, not trying to become dependent on him. he admired your drive, yet hated it at the same time. everything you’d done for him, it was his turn to be the caretaker. it should’ve been.

whenever tom wrapped filming for the holidays and came back home, you were always preparing for final exams. he kept you company, content with simply being in your presence. you typed away on your keyboard and read over notes until your eyes burned. tom occasionally brought you snacks, tea, asked how you were and what he could do.

sometimes, he would have to cut your study time short. he’d say it wasn’t healthy or you were overdoing it and to come relax with him for a bit. other times, tom let you be. he didn’t want to get in the way of your already stressful assignments. those were the nights you’d fall asleep in front of your laptop. drool on your chin, hunched over at your desk.

tom made sure to tuck you in, press a light kiss to whatever part of your face wasn’t covered in spit, then let himself out. he knew where your spare key was, so he used that. you’d wake up to a “Fell asleep studying again. Rest today x” text the next morning.

when it came time for you to graduate, tom was on the first flight there. it was during another round of reshoots for chaos walking. he respectfully told doug that he’d have to work around his schedule or replace him, which couldn’t be done so late into filming. tom didn’t care that it made him seem like a prick. he was getting to you no matter what he had to do.

he’d earned plenty of stares and whispers from people as he took his seat in the crowd. he was a proper celebrity now, so he expected it. his solution was to ignore everything and chat with your family about how proud they were of you, tom the most. he saw you go from a kid attempting algebra equations to an adult at her uni graduation. you’ve really grown up together.

it was why he teared up hearing them call your name, seeing you beam as you walked across the stage. your mom grabbed his hand and nodded at him, like she could tell exactly what was going through his head.

you ran right up to tom after the ceremony was over, leaping into his arms. he let out a couple of chuckles as he spun you around. “i didn’t think you’d make it,” you’d admitted, happy yet sad tears in your eyes. tom put you down so he could pull you in for a real hug. “i’ll always be wherever you are, y/n,” he said into your ear, rocking you while you gripped at his suit collar.

flash forward to a year later, your career is finally taking off, tom’s is flourishing like it has been for years, and you’re pregnant with his child. you’re trying to recall the series of events that led you to this moment.

you were both drunk, blackout drunk because the only reason you remember sleeping together is that you woke up naked in the same bed. harrison’s bed.

he threw a housewarming party for himself, having recently moved out of tom’s and the other boys’ place. the three of them, sam, and you were all in attendance, along with a lot of others you hadn’t met.

neither you nor tom could figure out where he knew all those people from. he’d clinged to you two for the most part, more so you now with tom usually away. they could have been from work. harrison is breaking into the business himself, small roles here and there. tom actually met him in your school’s theater program, then he introduced him to you, ten years ago already.

sam entertained himself by making concoctions with the snacks harrison set out. harry got together a playlist for the party. harrison and tuwaine struck up a conversation with some of harrison’s actor friends. that left you and tom alone, out of stuff to do, and with one way to fix it.

“drink?” tom had asked you, a smirk playing on his lips. “love one,” you hummed back and set off for the kitchen. the two of you raided harrison’s liquor cabinet, grabbing his biggest bottle of wine. he’d dumbly pointed it out during the house tour he gave you before the other guests arrived.

you were about to search for glasses, but tom’s fingers threaded through yours. he gently tugged you away and nodded behind him. “let’s bring this upstairs. seems much more fun there,” he’d murmured over the music, a grin breaking across your face.

tom is big on clubbing and socializing, however, you aren’t. he comes up with ways to get you out of these events, just in case.

“we can break in harrison’s bed for him,” you said as a completely harmless joke, no intentions of that becoming your reality later on. spoiler alert: it did. “and how are we gonna do that?” tom quirked a suggestive eyebrow and breathed out a laugh as you dragged him towards the stairs. despite yourself, you’d giggled at his words.

not one drink in either of you yet, and you were stumbling and cracking up as you ran upstairs. you’d pulled tom by your still attached hands into what you remembered as harrison’s room. tom shut the door, locked it, saying under his breath that would be a “convenient investment” for him to make as well.

he took out a bottle opener that he must have put in his pocket at some point and got to work on your wine, you getting comfortable on the new mattress. the two of you passed it to the other after every sip, tom licking the taste of your lip gloss off his own lips every so often.

the equivalent of three drinks in, you were making out. both of you were just tipsy at this point, tom holding you by your hips as you lied down, your legs around his waist. god, he could’ve done this sober. he’d dreamed about kissing you, really kissing you since he was fourteen. you’d always felt like you two had something more. ah, there it was.

halfway through the bottle got you past the next two bases, and you were ready for the fourth and ultimate one by the time you shook the last few drops onto the tip of your tongue. tom groaned at the sight of that, drawing your half naked body in closer to his.

you two had forgotten to use protection in each of your drunken states. without a doubt, you both would’ve agreed to a condom had your minds not been everywhere but where they should have.

you’d woken up first the morning after, panic immediately coursing through your veins thicker than blood. a fully nude and sleeping tom had you in his embrace, arms secured around your middle, facing you. you gasped when you made the connection, loudly enough to wake tom up. his long eyelashes tickled your face, a confused pout on his lips. uh... um...

“did we fucking...” you trailed off, no words to describe whatever unfolded. “fuck?” tom finished for you. a very blunt explanation, but true nevertheless. “looks like it,” he rasped, pout changing into a smile. your face fell at the vague memories of how you spent your night.

you definitely wanted to do it. just, he’s your best friend, who’s seen you at your least sexy moments over the years. when you were sick, had breakdowns from stress, you name literally anything, tom was there. it took one bottle of cheap wine for him to forget that?

the real answer was no. tom is entirely in love with you, for a decade at that. you were beginning to discover you feel the same, only you had no idea he already loves you. you’d assumed this was meant to be merely a hookup. from the frown your face held, he’d thought you were regretting it. oh, were you both so wrong.

“um... we don’t have to talk about it,” tom told you halfheartedly, under the impression that’s what you preferred. you physically felt yourself get weaker in tom’s strong arms. he’s not interested. “yeah, that’s probably for the best. i...” you were lying. his heart shrunk, shriveled up inside his chest. she doesn’t love me like that.

“you have to go. aren’t you behind on some emails?” tom hoped you didn’t hear his voice strain from the tears pushing at his eyes. “right. almost forgot, thanks.” you’d plastered on a smile, slipping out of his grasp. a tear rolled down his cheek, so he wiped it away before you noticed. you’d already gotten out of the bed and begun picking your clothes up off the floor.

“i’ll drive you home, then.” he rolled on to his other side, you thought so he could give you privacy to change. it was that, and also because he was crying. he couldn’t hold it in. tom is naturally an emotional person. imagine finding out the love you’ve had almost half your life is unreciprocated. it’s soul crushing.

you two found harrison snoring and on top of tuwaine as you left the house. no silly remarks or shared glances for the first time in ten years. tom couldn’t muster anything up, and you felt numb.

the drive was painful. you’d said your goodbyes after tom pulled up to the curb, which held an odd weight to them. once you were out of the car, a sob wracked through him, banging on the steering wheel and not giving a shit about the loud horn going off. you collapsed face first onto your bed. hours passed by while you stared at nothing and contemplated everything.

since it happened, you haven’t spoken much. small talk over text every few days or so, both of you pretending things are normal for the other’s sake. about a month later, today, is when you found out you’re pregnant.

there’s no use wallowing in any of this. you need to figure out your next move, one that should probably involve tom. first, you want to talk to someone else. you want other opinions and a voice in your head that isn’t your own. harrison gets a text from you saying to come over now, the now in all caps. he does.

you let him in after the second knock, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. however torn you are, you must look it. shirt balled in your fists, lip quivering. he keeps his eyes on yours as he steps inside, pushing the door shut behind him. this is all becoming too real. “y/n, are you okay?”

you’re about to cry in three, two...

“haz, i fucked up,” you choke out, tears unable to stay at bay. he takes you into his arms for a hug. half your face is hidden in his shoulder, hands clutching at his back. he lets you cry it out, holding you until your heavy breathing steadies. “what’s happened?” harrison asks quietly, both of you leaving the hug.

“if- if i tell you, you can’t freak out. you can’t tell anyone else, either,” you instruct, searching his eyes for certainty that he won’t under any circumstances. “i won’t, y/n/n,” he assures you and puts an encouraging hand on your arm. your heart pounding abnormally fast, you spit it out. your first time saying it aloud. “i’m pregnant.”

harrison flinches and doesn’t even try to conceal it. he takes his hand off of you, worry swimming across his features. he blinks at you, unsure of what to say. you’d react the same way, maybe worse, so you don’t blame him. a discussion you, him, and tom had a couple years back replays in his mind.

the three of you were talking about your futures, seeing as you were close to living them. when tom asked you two where you stood on having your own families, you didn’t hesitate to answer. “nope, the factory is closed for a long ass time.” until you were in your thirties, you aimed to focus on yourself. harrison distinctly remembered because of how you phrased it.

“you’re... you... wow,” is all he replies with. you head over to the couch, more tears welling up in your eyes. do the pregnancy hormones act up this early? harrison follows you over and sits down next to you with an awkward clearing of his throat. “do you want to be pregnant?” he has to ask because he’s not sure if he should congratulate you or what.

“i don’t know,” you answer honestly, voice airy. your eyes are fixed on the wall in front of you. you haven’t given yourself time to think about it. there are so many reasons you don’t, and a single one you do. “do you, um, know who the dad is?” harrison glances over at you. “yeah.” your voice cracks. you’re both afraid for him to ask what he does next.

he shifts so he’s sitting up. “can i know?” a sniffle passing through you, you finally look at him. “it’s tom,” you say it before you lose the nerve to. harrison’s face doesn’t change this time. he isn’t surprised you and tom went there. he’d seen your friendship growing into more the older you all got. what he can’t believe is where it took you.

his best friend pregnant, and his other best friend responsible for it.

“when did you...” “at your party,” you explain, bringing your legs up so they’re criss cross on the couch. “i thought you were gone a little too long.” he says that to try cheering you up. you appreciate the effort, but it doesn’t work. you’re not in a joking mood. he’ll stick to the main issue. “so, have you told him?”

“clearly not,” you scoff, not at him but at what you two have gotten yourselves into. “y/n... i think you should tell him,” harrison sighs out, then adds, “whether you keep it or not.” “why? that would ruin everything, it already has.” you’re getting angry now, which plunges you into angry crying, voice unsteady as you go on.

“the last time i saw tom was that night, and i guess it meant more to me than it did to him because we haven’t talked about it at all. he didn’t want to.” you swipe the back of your hand across your eyes, gaze stern compared to harrison’s soft one.

he drapes an arm around your shoulders, you curling into him with another sniffle. he doesn’t say anything for a minute, then he tries again. “i know you, y/n, and i know tom. you’ll kill yourselves not talking about this.” he’s right, no shit he is. avoiding telling tom how you feel, and your pregnancy on top of that, it’s eating you up inside. it’s swallowing you whole.

“what if he doesn’t want to be a dad? or- or i’m a shit mum?” you croak out, your doubts getting the best of you. “i can barely take care of myself. what am i supposed to do with a baby?” you’re leaning forward with your hands pressing into your temples. harrison’s hand moves to your upper back. “i- i don’t think i should have them. i... we can’t,” you conclude.

“tom loves kids,” he gives you a gentle reminder. “why would his own be the exception?” another good point, yet you still have rebuttles. “right, he’s a godfather and he’s really good with them and all that, but i’m not the right person, and it’s a terrible time,” you tell him all at once, in a rush to get your words out before harrison’s sway you.

“he’s never around, i’m doing my own stuff. we’re not meant for this.” you lift your head out of your hands and sit back on the couch. harrison returns his hands to his lap. he’s frowning at you, which you see from the corner of your eye. “i’m not going to force you to have the baby. just saying you have options.”

yeah, really shitty ones.

“either way, talk to tom.” harrison says this more like a demand so you’ll take his advice into actual consideration. “at least about the hookup.” your teeth sink into your lower lip, eyes watering for the nth time already.

you have no choice because he’s right again. you’ll never move on from what happened unless you and tom address it.

the next morning, you do what harrison told you to and invite tom over. he replied saying he was on his way maybe a minute later. he’s nervous to see you because yeah, but more so looking forward since it’s been so long. you’re so nauseous you barely have room for nerves. it’s morning sickness with a hint anxiety.

it feels almost normal when he first gets here, no how’ve you been and what are you up to these days? being as close as you and tom are, you’re not capable of such a dry conversation. personally, you still feel uneasy while he recounts a golfing incident him and harry got into the other day. you know something he doesn’t.

“when i tell you we flew, we flew,” tom makes a pushing forward motion with both hands. “right into the tree. i think harry, like, dented part of his face.” he lets out a breathy laugh, you forcing out one of your own. you’d be more interested without the fact that you’re expecting a child, his child, at the back of your mind.

tom exhales, shifting to face you on your couch. it’s funny how different things were when you and harrison sat in these same spots yesterday. so much has and is about to change.

“they had to send another golf cart to come get us. it was wild.” “it sounds wild,” you hollowly agree. he can tell you’re not too invested in hearing about harry’s terrible driving skills, so he changes the subject. “anyway, harrison told me he came over last night?” your stomach drops, heat coming over your whole body.

“did... did he say why?” you murmur with a look of urgency in your eyes. tom shrugs a shoulder, and casually. there’s no way he knows. “no, was he supposed to?” his tone stays playful, which you can thankfully tell. that puts you more at ease. “no. no, never mind. i would’ve asked you to come, but...” you’re searching through your catalog of excuses.

thank god tom says something else because you can’t find a good one. “it’s alright. i actually, um, had a work call.” a small smile spreads across his face, a proud one. intrigued, you raise both eyebrows. “what’d you talk about?” tom twiddles with his fingers in his lap. “i’ve been offered an audition for this really amazing film. everything works out, it’ll be huge for me.”

you’re smiling back this time, putting a hand over one of his. “woah, that’s incredible. i’m so happy for you, tom.” you lock your fingers with his from the back of his hand. he looks down at them, humbly shaking his head. “when is it?” “a few weeks from today. it films in brazil...”

oh. you can’t tell him now. it’s not worth him missing out on a milestone in his career for a baby you’re not sure you should have. that would be so unfair of you to ask. what are you going to do, not support his dreams for the first time in a literal decade? and, you’d call yourself his best friend through it all?

you guess this also means the way you feel about tom is one sided. he’s okay with leaving you after the most intimate moment you two have ever shared. you’ll dance around it the rest of your lives. better yet, act like the night never even happened. that’s not so easy to do when you’ve got a permanent reminder of it.

the thought makes you sick to your stomach. so sick, you could...

while tom is talking more about what the audition entails, you suddenly bolt up from the couch. you run for the bathroom, a hand cupped over your mouth. his face twists up in confusion from your disappearance. tom calls, “y/n/n?” out to you, but you can’t respond because your head is in the toilet. he rushes in when he hears you retching.

he gets onto the floor with you. you’re bent over, puking your guts out, back in another place where your life changed forever less than twenty four hours ago. tom pulls your hair out of your face and into a makeshift ponytail with one hand, his other on your back. that’s all you have in you. you stay over the toilet just to be sure.

saliva drips from your mouth, making you cough roughly, the sound echoing. tom moves so he’s next to you, keeping his hand in your hair and not caring one bit about the smell because he loves you and he’s utterly concerned about what he witnessed.

“love, are you sick?” he coos, searching for your eyes. they water from the intensity of everything. “morning sickness,” you answer without thinking first. shit. shit, shit, shit. it came out of you like more vomit, word vomit. there’s no going back now.

tom lets go of your hair with his eyes still on yours. his hand on your back then leaves you, fingers trailing down your body as they go. “morning sickness,” he repeats, putting it together. “you’re pregnant?” guilt taking over your features, you sit across from tom. you’re once again leaning against the bathtub, him against the counter.

“this isn’t how i wanted you to find out,” you admit and bring your knees up to your chest. “i took a test yesterday. it was positive.” your arms wrap around your legs, you now tearing up because tom figured it out. a shaky breath passes his lips. “i haven’t gone to my doctor or anything yet, but i-“

“are you keeping the baby?” tom cuts in. not to judge you for your choice, to find out what the fuck is going on before he travels across the world. you tighten your arms around yourself, grabbing your wrist. “i haven’t decided.” he gives you an understanding nod and reaches out for you. you dodge him. he might not want to do that after what you say next.

“tom, i... there’s more,” you whimper out. “yeah. i’m... i’m listening,” tom croaks, unable to hold in his infinite amount of emotions for a multitude of reasons. he’s losing you a second time. more tears spill from your eyes as you break the news, the news that will destroy what he’s been working towards his entire life.

“the baby is yours.” his face relaxes, looking almost relieved when you confess it. “when we slept together, uh,” you’re sure it’s obvious enough that you don’t have to go over the details. he’s tearing up himself. you reluctantly continue. “if you still want to audition, i get it. we don’t have to do this.”

“fuck the audition. fuck the whole movie. all of my movies, really,” tom surprises you by blurting out. he moves in until your legs are touching. “i’m staying. even if you don’t have the baby, i have to be here.” you watch in disbelief as he wipes away what are actually happy tears. “really? i was scared you’d resent me for it, or hate me even,” you mumble to him.

“y/n, what? why would i ever do that?” tom places a hand on your cheek, touch gentle and filled with love. you part your legs so he can be closer to you. he takes the space between them, thumb brushing over your skin. “i didn’t think you’d want to deal with all of this. i thought that night was only a hookup for you.” your voice wobbles under his gaze.

“no, are you kidding? i thought that’s what you thought.” he’s smiling now, eyes twinkling along with it. what he’s been meaning to tell you since you were only kids finally comes out. “i’ve loved you as long as i’ve known you, y/n. i always imagined myself doing this with you.” his words draw a quiet laugh from you, a happy one. “i know we were drunk, but i meant it all.”

the sincerity in his voice, the warmth in his eyes, they make you cry all over again. you’re getting used to it.

“i love you, tom,” you lean into him with a sniffle and a grin, his forehead now resting on yours, using his thumb to catch one of your tears. “i really do.” “i love you forever. i always have,” tom speaks lowly, breath fanning across your face. your hands grab at his shoulders. “so, you’ll stay? you’ll do this with me?” he reminds you of what he said before, this time a promise.

“forever.”

-

you ended up having the baby, and tom held your hand through the entire labor. nikki was holding his other hand, your mom holding your other hand. harrison had originally been in the room as well. when you started to push, he got freaked out and had to leave. your support system remained strong either way.

despite his repulsion of your daughter’s birth, you and tom decided to make harrison her godfather. he eventually became the godfather of your other two children also, which you had a few years later.

tom took a paternity leave from the industry so he could be with you and jamie. he’d also used his time off to propose to you, something else he fantasized about since year eleven in school. it wasn’t anything too grand because the whole world was already buzzing about you two, and a big gesture felt too impersonal with everything you’d been through together.

he did it in the form of passing a note, something you often did in class to avoid being scolded by your teacher for talking. the note came with a pencil to check off either the yes or no box, “will you marry me?” written above them. anyone else would have found it so unromantic, but you giggled as you checked off yes before your lips crashed into his smiling ones.

you were married shortly after the proposal, jamie as your flower girl and all your friends and family in attendance.

to do what he loved and stay with the people he loved, tom created his own version of hollywood in london. he took it upon himself to assemble a team and make a production company. harry behind the camera, harrison and tuwaine in the films, and tom either starring alongside them or directing. they give so many young actors tons of opportunities.

you eventually went back to work, too. it was like you’d never left, coworkers offering endless hugs and going over what you missed, not that you struggled getting into it. tom was there to celebrate every promotion, every compliment from your boss, every part of your life. jamie was also there, then liam and lucy.

all three of them are running around the house right now, putting on shoes and collecting their supplies for school. you take a sip of the orange juice liam didn’t finish with a lighthearted eye roll. tom chuckles as he passes you in the kitchen, getting the kids’ lunchboxes for them to minimize the chaos.

“you have that pitch meeting today, right?” he slips his hands through the lunchbox handles and walks over to you. “mhm,” you hum, mouth full with juice. his lips press to your temple, giving your waist a one handed squeeze. “you’ll smash it. always do.” “thanks, tommy.” putting down the cup, you reach up to button whatever parts of his shirt he didn’t have time to.

“aren’t you doing a casting? for the new script they sent?” you wonder aloud and smooth down the cotton material. “me and harry. should be interesting,” he remarks, you giving him a quick kiss back on his chin. they tend to have their artistic differences. “good luck with that. you do drop off, i’ll do pick up?” you pat one of the lunchboxes around his arms.

“deal.” tom goes in for a kiss on your lips, then a chorus of dad, we have to go led by jamie rings through the house. with a knowing smile, you push at his chest. “see you later. love you.” “love you, holland,” he bites back a grin of his own. his last name, now yours, suits you perfectly.

[ultraintrovertedgryffindor]

oh beloved writer can you please write a christmas date imagine for will poulter (even though it’s still summer) just pure fluff, where the reader and will go out to like a diner and then go buy a tree for their apartment (it’s their first christmas living together) and set it up and dance to christmas music and it’s super domestic and soft and fluffy thank you bff

Of course, my love! And hey, if Christmas in July can be a thing, so can Christmas in August. And oh boy, I made this one so sweet you might get cavities, so just, beware of that.

~~~~~~~~~~

You were excited, to put it lightly. This was the first Christmas you and you partner, Will, would be having while living together. You knew it was cheesy, but you wanted it to feel special.

You made reservations at this really fancy restaurant in the fanciest part of town. A bit over the top on your part, but you wanted to make this Christmas one to remember fondly.

You still haven't gotten a tree yet, so that was on your to-do list as well. You hoped there would be some nice trees to choose from.

Some people would've probably thought you were going mad with how much you wanted everything to be perfect, and yeah, you kind of were. But you completely ignored your logic and reasoning.

You bought a really nice outfit for yourself to wear to the restaurant, Christmassy but not too Christmassy, you weren't wearing reindeer antlers or red and green bells. It was simple, may or may not to somewhat match Will's outfit that he was going to wear.

With Will's hand in yours, you walked to your car and headed to the restaurant and got there a few minutes early, which was historical for you. You smiled along with Will as you entered the warm building, a pleasant contrast from the winter cold outside. "Hi! Reservation for L/n?" You asked bubbly, the evening already going so well that you were sure nothing could dampen your spirits.

It took a minute for the hostess to check, as the place was fairly busy due to the holidays. "Um, I'm sorry, I don't see your name here."

You immediately tensed, a half a second of anger bolting through you before you simply smiled understandingly. "Can you double check, please? I'm certain it's there, I called this in a week ago." You chuckled nervously.

"I'm sorry, but there is no reservation under L/n."

Your smiled dropped, your eye involuntarily twitching a couple times before your cleared your throat. "That...that can't be right."

Will turned to you, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. "Hey, it's okay. It happens. We can just go somewhere else." He smiled softly. You frowned in response, turning back to the hostess with pleading eyes, only to get a tight lipped smile as another apology.

You hung your head for a second, before walking out of the building at a quick pace, dead silent as you sat back in your car. Will cautiously got into the car, anxiously anticipating your eventual release of your frustration.

"What the fuck?!" You yelled into your steering wheel, causing Will to jump at the sudden outburst, even when he was expecting it. "I booked that table a week ago! Will, you were right next to me when I called the place!" You pleaded to no one, feeling defeated and pissed off. "Ugh..." You drawled out, collapsing against your seat.

Will couldn't help but chuckle at your cute pouting face, reaching over to gently massage your thigh. "It's okay, darling! This is just a minor setback. I'm sure there are other places we can go."

Yes, there were other places you could go, none of them fancy restaurants. You felt even more defeated when you had to settle for some fast food place. This is absolutely not how you wanted this evening to go.

You stared down at your burger and fries with distain. "This should be an overpriced steak at an overpriced fancy restaurant with live music, arrogant chefs and overly nice waiters who wear really fancy suits and ties." You mumbled.

Will raised an eyebrow. "That doesn't sound quite as nice as being in an almost empty fast food place with no one to bother us. And I quite like my food, I haven't found a single hair in it, so it's practically 5-star."

You rolled your eyes as you chuckled at his silliness. "At least we still get to pick out a Christmas tree, that should be fun."

"Hopefully we won't get hypothermia out in this weather. So, what type of tree are you thinking we get?"

You smiled dreamily. "I've always wanted a full, thick Frasier fir."

"Ambitious. A Frasier fir it is."

It might've been a bit too ambitious, because when you got to one of the only places in town that sold Christmas trees, there were no such trees in sight. They had all been sold out apparently. No worry, there would probably be one at another place. Nope, none there. So, you drove to the last place in town and lo and behold, no thick firs in sight.

"I think the world's against me."

Will trapped you in a hug from behind as you stood dumbfounded at the selection of trees available. Some of them could give Charlie Brown's Christmas tree a run for its money.

"What about that one?" Will pointed towards the corner of the small field you two stood in.

You laughed when you finally saw what he was looking at. The tree was a fir, but it looked so bare that you could call it a Charlie Brown tree. "You can't be serious."

"I'm deadly serious." He smirked, letting you go to jog eagerly to the pitiful looking tree. You chuckled sadly as he held onto it, the thing wasn't even as tall as Will, and even skinnier. "Ain't it a beauty?" He said in a slightly Australian accent, almost cringing at himself.

No.

"I guess."

The look of pure childlike joy on Will's face, you couldn't deny him that stupid tree. It was so small, you could probably fit it in your car, but you didn't want to clean up all the needles it would shed. It fastened to the roof of your car easily, too easily.

By the time you had set it up in your living room with Will, the tree kind of grew on you; it was like an ugly dog, so ugly it was cute, you supposed. Once it had all the decorations on, it didn't look too bad, but it still wasn't what you hoped for. It seemed this whole day you planned out to the T, nothing went the way you wanted it to, and that was a bit disheartening. What annoyed you, surprisingly, was Will's overwhelming optimism. Usually, it was endearing, but today was not one of those days where you needed optimism.

"You okay, Y/n?" Will asked intuitively.

"It's just...this day went to shit. How can you be so...perfect?"

Will blushed at your phrasing, but he knew what you meant. "I was annoyed with certain things today, the restaurant issues, for sure. But, it wasn't enough to put me in a bad mood all day. I chose to let it go so that we could have a good time, that's all."

You frowned, suddenly feeling really guilty. "I was in such a bad mood all day." You huffed, taking a seat on your couch. "I ruined this whole day..."

"No!" Will rushed over to you. "I didn't mean it like that, I-"

"I know, but you're right. I shouldn't have acted like such a child. I'm sorry."

Will smiled sadly. "Darling, you certainly did not ruin anything. None of this was your fault and you behaved how any normal person would. But even after all that happened, I still had an amazing time. We had a nice, quiet dinner. And we got our own little Charlie Brown tree." He chuckled. "Didn't you have a nice time too?"

You smiled sheepishly. "I did."

"We don't have to go to the fanciest restaurant or buy the nicest Christmas tree to have a nice time together. We could've stayed inside all day and I wouldn't have cared, just being here with you is what makes me the happiest."

You couldn't help but lean forwards to kiss him, so incredibly grateful that he was in your life. "Well, I'd say our first Christmas will be one to remember."

"Oh, it's not over yet." He added, causing you to furrow your brows in curiosity. He only winked as he walked to the other side of the room, fiddling with the record player.

"No..." You groaned playfully as Last Christmas by Wham! echoed through your apartment.

Will nodded, a cheeky smile playing on his lips. "Oh yeah, come on." He held out his hand to you, motioning for you to take it. You giggled as he started to lip sync the lyrics, shimmying his shoulders as he still waiting for you to take his hand.

"Oh my god." You blushed, finally taking his hand and him instantly pulling you up and grabbing you by the waist to pull you into a hug, violently swaying to the music. "Will!" You laughed uncontrollably.

"What? You don't like my dance moves?" He grinned.

"You're gonna break me if you keep doing that." You grinned back.

Will shook his head, toning down the fast swaying and settled into a relaxing sway, looking into your eyes fondly. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me."

You blushed, resting your head and hiding your face on his chest, the sound of his heartbeat much better music than any Christmas song you've ever listened to.

~~~~~~~~~~

bruh...this...was so fluffy I almost died. I hope me almost dying of fluffiness was worth it to you, @poulterfilms