#and I mean that literally actually I was losing memory and saying weird shit

[sermna]

Thank you to my parents for taking my son for a night so I could get a full night of sleep for the first time in weeks 😭🙌

[tyoffee]

ACROSS THE SPIDERVERSE SPOILER DUMP BELOW 💥💥💥💥💥💥

starting with the cameos oh ymgod

BEN. BEN REILLY MY LITTLE EDGELORD. he is like fail girlfriend to me. I need to see more of the clone squad in part two (spiderboycough)

DONLAD GLOVER PROWLER HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII LOSING it over his suit

AND THE OTHER LIVE ACTIONS UEOEOOGUH I DIDNT KNOW THEY COULD DO THAT!! EVERYONE THOUGHT THAT GWENS PETER WAS ANDREW (nope he's blonde) BUT NO ACTUAL ANDREW GARFIELD WAS IN THE 'SPIDERVERSE' VISUALISER ALONG W RAIMI UNCLE BEN GOTD DAMN!!!!!!!!!!

speaking of what everyone thought I love the changes from the trailer. Everyone saying oohhhh they're showing too much they're giving away the whole movie WRONG. YOU COULD NOT COOOMMPRREEHEEENDDD THE SHIT THAT WENT ON IN THERE.

miles' expression changes especially. he is Not as cringefail as initially believed put some respect on his name. he can be cringefail Later.

oh my godddd oh hyhg PAVITR.... PAVITR MY BEAUTIFUL BOY we need more of him we need more of him in part two do you hear me Sony.

'coconut oil, prayers and genetics' INCREDIBLE SHOWSTOPPING HILARIOUS

HIS UNIVERSE W A S OKAY FUCK YOU GUYS. HE DID JINX IT A COUPLE TIMES THOUGH BUT THATS NOT HIS FAULT

THE WAY HE HAS A GWEN.. AOUUUUUUUUUHH. CAPTAIN SINGH LIVES BABY

the way that the main tension in this movie is literally CAPTAIN STACY MUST DIE. so real

the thing is he usually doesn't too it's great

SPEAKING OF COMIC CONVENTIONS.

ULTIMATUM / THE PROWLER MILES MORALES

I TOLD YOU I SAID I SAID THERES GOING TO BE THE ORIGINAL MILES.

The movie is So good at letting you forget that the spider was glitching too. That's not his spider. Miles is the original anomaly OUUGGHGH (miguel was a Bitch for saying it like that tho)

ULTIMATE AARON DAVIS HIS FUCKING EYES HIS EEEYES MAN OUUUHHHHHHH

THE WAY ULTIMATE MILES' SPANISH IS BETTER. HIS BRAIDS. HES ON THE STREETS MORE. HES THE FUCKING PROWLER. AUG god they're gonna tell us who the spider was for ik and I do hope it's miles. yeah there's a spiderman miles who can exist but it's not you. You weren't supposed to be here. AUG

Since we have the Jefferson memorial maybe ultimatum has a great expectations piece too. maybe that's how he's reasoned with who knows I'd love to think that the collider is the split off point between both of them

Though that'd mean there'd need to be an og spiderman to make wilson fisk lose his family which there isn't- hey wait how was the spider created without fisk doing his dimensional shit. I thought we weren't allowed to acknowledge Norman Osborn.

also also also speaking of alchemex Spot being bagel guy. Of course he is. Holes

Do you think that was the inspiration. Bagel hole.

Anyways I need a full turnaround sheet of Ultimatum/Prowler I need to see him I love the glow and the spray on symbol aaaugghh

BETER AND GWEN FAKE AS HELL 🖕

I get the struggle tho. Beter and Captain Stacy made my dad cry.

ALSO GWENS BAND AT THE END

SORRY I ALMOST FORGOT HHOBBBIEEEE HOBIE 'if you want a watch just make one. we're spiderman we can just do it 🤨🤨🤨🤨' BROWN I LOVE HIS STYLE I LIVE FOR HIS STYLE PORTALS I LOVE HIS PROWLER THEME OH MY GOD

THE SOUNDTRACK RELEASES TOMORROW AND I NEED HIS PROWLER THEME YOU DONT GET IT

i get my 2 hours of gatekeeping this movie b4 it drops in america and I'm losing it I need to talk abt it with other ppl but I'm also is it mean to want to hold it away from ppl who don't care abt spiderman and idk what they do draw weird porn of every new movie and ppl who will misinterpret it completely that feels selfish of me Anyways

THIS MOVIE IS A MASTERPIECE. literally it's art it's animation oh hhhhhgh it's so gorgeous I'm not kidding it's bresthestking (PAVITRS SWINGING!!!!!) but it's also just SO FUCKING GOOD. THE SCENES THE SHOTS THEY WENT CRAZY ON ENVIRONMENTS OH MY GLORD

ITS SO GOOD. ITS SO GOOODODDDDDDDDDDDD AUG

I'm seeing it again in like 2 days . I will not be satiated until 2024.

[emilinqa]

what do you think about the search for spock

LOLL thank you for asking. i wasnt expecting someone to actually send me an ask when i said that but youve opened pandoras box. so.

i think the thing about the search for spock that makes it stick in my head so bad is that in reality its like. a mid movie. its okay. it falls short in almost everything it tries to do but it hits the emotional highs and lows and looks good which means it gets by just fine. it's one of those 80s movies where you get about an hour in and realize oh okay the plot is happening. like this is it. TMP suffers a little bit in this way too but its also why i find myself thinking about it much more than the "good" movies.

the curse of tmp and tsfs that particularly riddles me is that i think they have some really interesting things going on conceptually that never come to fruition-- not necessarily at fault of the movie because they're ultimately minor and i dont really know how they would explore them in greater ways-- but that i find personally very compelling. i've said this before but i yearn for a star trek space horror movie so deeply and im not gonna punish either tmp nor tsfs for not being something they're not trying to be but i think the horror elements of both movies are really untapped in terms of fan exploration/meta/content. the spock/mccoy stuck in the same body mind meld thing is played mostly for laughs (because it is a good bit. and very funny) but honestly i find the fact it like. physically makes mccoy sick and absolutely freaks everyone the fuck out like good for haunting reasons.

THIS SCENE in particular i think hits the mark on the weird creepy aspect of mccoy being partially posessed by spocks katra

it also helps its shot and lit clearly with some horror influences in mind; the way bones is sitting creepily in the chair while spocks voice speaks through him, enshrouded in shadow, etc.. of course the movie has to split itself between the ship and what's happening on the genesis planet but i really would have loved some more of these moments where spock is Haunting the enterprise and its freaking everyone the fuck out. there is that bit later on where bones actually speaks in spocks voice on the bridge and kirk turns around like wow bones that was really cool never do that shit again that was freaky as fuck and its mostly just funny but the implication that spocks actual voice can be spoken through mccoys body is something im thinking about. really bad.

i really enjoy the ways the movie shows kirk is so deeply haunted by the death of spock (i mean, the movie opens with him saying "the death of spock is like an open wound" so.) and obviously by extension, mccoy, who is stuck with spocks literal soul in his brain the whole movie. the mind meld scene with sarek is also a really good moment which is also just shot and lit well. are you sensing a theme here. im easily swayed by pretty colors.

this in combination with the weird gross regenerative process spock's body is going through on the genesis planet is very compelling to me. i was talking to a friend about this recently and he brought up that he was imagining that spock and the genisis planet had kind of a symbiosis; that he could feel the terror and disaster of the planet even outside of the biological regeneration process his own body was going through which i thought was fascinating. especially because of all the moments during the series where spock would mind meld with a being everyone else was unable to comprehend as a life form. theres something there.

its not really explored in the movie, and really not in depth in any of the further movies, but i also think spock losing his memory after being rejoined with his body is an interesting addition to the themes of rebirth and memory. the rift created between everyone who remembers spock before and wants to allow the New Spock to be the man he wants to be, but they're ultimately haunted by the lives they all had with him before. kirk having spent a whole life with him, only to lose him, gain him back, and then have spock not really remember what they had before. kirk trying not to resent him for it, spock knowing it doesn't make sense to be hurt that kirk wants him to be something he can't, etc etc. its good stuff.

tldr they should send me back in time so i can make the 80s star trek horror movie ive always wanted.

[skaruresonic]

The double standard gets more annoying when you realize fandom don't ACTUALLY care for canon...if it means abitrarily bringing back chars or reffing stuff

Like, fans are mad Iizuka didn't know what Choco Island from Tails Advejtures was regarding Forces dev. Ignoring that it's NOT a game made by Sonic Team, and very blatantly contradicts Tails having low self esteem and being bullied before he met Sonic (then you have other Aspect Games do dumb shit that contradicts Sonic Team stuff, along with weird rehash of Green Hill). I'm aware Sonic Channel recently reffed it last year, but notably don't mention events of the game. Same for Fang being canonized, Triple Trouble isn't mentioned

People hype up Emerl being in the Shadow short ignoring that the literal diary entries note that Shadow wasn't even awakened yet. At least one can argue that Doom was mem hacking, but people genuinely believe that the memory is legit and don't care cuz "OMG, SHADOW VS EMERL FIGHT"

Same for people treating Neo Metal as a basic Super Form that can kick Sonic's ass, when no, it's just a recepticle to gaining DNA needed to tutn inyo a Perfect Chaos based form

A lot of this really just boils down to "canon be damned, I want char fights, or any game is canon cuz Aaron Webber said so"

It's a mess

People hype up Emerl being in the Shadow short ignoring that the literal diary entries note that Shadow wasn't even awakened yet.

Admittedly I couldn't remember the content of Gerald's Battle diary entries, so I had to look them up. Reading through them, I realized that Shadow fighting Emerl renders Gerald's problems nonsensical in hindsight due to the way establishing Links works, as stated by Battle.

In addition, Gerald says it was the researchers who managed to subdue Emerl and seal him away. For some reason, the researchers kept giving Emerl more and more weapons to absorb:

---

Journal 5

The higher ups are threatening to shut down this research facility. I had no choice but to hand them the Gizoid to buy more time for my research. I tried to be careful and commanded it to never absorb any dangerous technologies. However, I have heard that other researchers have been making the Gizoid absorb weapons. Apparently, the way to cause the Gizoid to form a new "Link" is to show it power that surpasses that of its former master. While this poses immense danger, I cannot risk losing Maria.

---

Journal 6

My worst fears have come true. The Gizoid has absorbed enough weaponry and technology that it has started to go out of control. The resulting rampage resulted in the destruction of most of the "Ark." ... I have deciphered the rest of the stone tablet. It says, "When the Gizoid had learned all that it could, it became a god of wrath, and all was destroyed." The researchers somehow managed to subdue the Gizoid and sealed it away. Luckily, it only had one "Chaos Emerald" installed. If it were to have all 7 Emeralds installed, it might destroy the whole planet. The Gizoid is too much of a liability. I tried destroying its core, but nothing I did worked. I understand too little of the technology that built him. My best hope is to try and reprogram its AI into a free-willed, emotions-based AI...

---

Assuming this fight is indeed real, and that Shadow wins, that raises an entire slew of problems.

If Shadow fights Emerl, and inadvertently establishes a Link with the Gizoid by defeating him, Gerald's dilemma vanishes instantly.

All Gerald would have to do then is order Emerl to follow Shadow the way Sonic did:

Therefore, Gerald would have no reason to "try and reprogram its AI into a free-willed, emotions-based AI" in a last-ditch effort to bring the Gizoid to heel. He would have had no reason to install the final program or a soul identical to Maria's into Emerl. The events of Sonic Battle would never happen in the first place. Shadow's interference would have rendered his efforts moot.

tfw the fight is so peak that it threatens to break canon

Now, again, granted, this scenario is predicated on the assumptions that

A.) the fight is real; if it isn't, I just have to question why our time is being wasted on a fake scenario,

and B.) Shadow wins the fight. If he loses and Emerl goes on to destroy the ARK, that'd be another issue - how do the researchers manage to subdue him where Shadow cannot? And wouldn't that kind of feed into Shadow's complex about being unable to protect Maria?

Idk, the implications become weird and untenable the more you think about them. Maybe Black Doom really is sticking Shadow in a scenario where he makes him feel as WEEEEEAK as a certain masked villain, but I must ask once again what the point of that is. I ain't playing SxS Gens just to watch this motherfucker get woobified, you know what I mean?

---

I'm aware Sonic Channel recently reffed it last year, but notably don't mention events of the game.

Just because ST references things doesn't necessarily make them canon.

(coughs)

---

Same for people treating Neo Metal as a basic Super Form that can kick Sonic's ass, when no, it's just a recepticle to gaining DNA needed to tutn inyo a Perfect Chaos based form

A Super form? Why?

Metal couldn't complete his transformation without everyone's data and Chaos' ability to metamorphize. In Charmy's words: "Incomplete freak!"

---

A lot of this really just boils down to "canon be damned, I want char fights, or any game is canon cuz Aaron Webber said so"

It's a mess

Peak fiction often hinges on the aesthetics of a scene rather than the logistics. Who cares if Shadow fighting Emerl is so acanonical that it has the potential to retcon Sonic Battle as an entire game? It feels right, therefore it must be right.

Personally, I feel like it detracts from both Shadow's backstory and the ARK's unique identity as a research facility somewhat to have all of these disparate elements link (pun not intended) back to Shadow in some way. The ARK needs to be able to stand as a bastion of scientific progress on its own merits, with all the implications that brings to the table, and not just be regarded solely as Shadow's birthplace.

It should be stressed that the ARK developed tools of destruction alongside projects of medicine and healing. That is worth taking into consideration when examining the colony's purpose as a whole.

When people speak about the colony's darker underbelly, they tend to portray its horrors as those of unethical medical experimentation. In actuality, the real horrors reside more in the general territory of the politics of WMD development. "What the fuck did they have to create a planet-destroying cannon for? Who commissioned it? Why? What was its intended use?"

SA2 and Battle both touched upon the dangers of weapons of mass destruction. In particular, the ethical considerations and mindset of those who created them. These themes reflected the cultural anxiety of the early aughts concerning their development and use.

SA2 is more subtle in that it leaves Gerald's motivations in developing such a weapon ambiguous - Eggman raising questions of whether it was Gerald's legacy and intent to destroy mankind. Battle, on the other hand, is so blatantly anti-war that you're practically hearing War Pigs by Sabbath in the background.

The Gizoid counts as a WMD. Nothing can prevent it from going on a rampage and destroying everything, and flexing your power in order to retain control only escalates risk the more you do it. The only real effective countermeasure Gerald could think of was to give it a soul to dissuade it from ever pressing the nuke launch button. Or, in more allegorical terms, temper one's destructive impulses via conscience.

It takes Eggman forcibly overpowering and dehumanizing Emerl in order to reduce him to a WMD again. Except he loses control of Emerl immediately thereafter and winds up having his Final Egg Blaster getting aimed at the Earth without his consent, much like how nuclear bombs cause indiscriminate destruction.

It's such a brilliant and multi-tiered message, artfully delivered by Battle. Which is why it becomes undercut if we can have Shadow solve Gerald's problem in an instant.

[kosmic-arts]

Roxas, Namine, & the Reality That Carl Jung is Real

OK SO. this video is great and is an even more detailed, succinct version of what i was talking about in my roxas/kh2 plot analysis post. please watch, this is such good food for thought. for a while ive really been thinking about the meaning of nobodies in kh, and how i feel the concept has been gradually bastardized over the course of the story- but disregarding that lmao! i have been making the connection myself about how similar nobodies are to the concept of the shadow in carl jung's psychology theories, and boy howdyyyy was it great to see i wasn't the only one, because violet howler mentions the same in this video. as ive mentioned before, i feel like roxas and namine should have never been pushed as being their own separate people, rather as reflections of sora's and additionally, kairi's worst aspects. or at least the parts of themselves they repress. roxas and namine should have always been vehicles to help strengthen the main characters, rather than growing into people of their own- that way the ending of kh2 would've actually been the happy ending that they were clearly trying to push that it was for roxas and namine. but only to backpedal in ddd.... in the video, violet howler tries to argue the contrary- that the further developments in the series for roxas and namine to separate as whole people from sora and kairi are logical extensions of their representation as shadows- but i just disagree. i already mention this in my post linked above, but sora and kairi should've grown as people and actually gained the memories and experiences of their nobodies when they merged; the whole plotpoint of confronting the side of themselves they wouldn't rather acknowledge should've been wrapped up ages ago in kh2 instead of being stretched out for so long. roxas and namine's stories and connection to one another should've been more tightly written to more properly lead into their ending of returning to their counterparts. i am still miffed about how roxas spends so much of days chasing after xion who gets to have all the character development and hard choices, instead of the guy you're literally playing as- ok.... although ill say namine is written a lot better, as she gradually grows into having her own initiative- and its nice that kairi in kh2 also starts to express the same urge as she decides to stop waiting for sora and riku and just go find them herself. anyway. i will say though, i am very so-so hmmm lukewarm about the whole "nobodies can grow hearts" shtick. in a lot of ways, i like the idea. BUT ONLY when you think about it through this context: through forming connections with others, and holding on to their humanity so to speak- nobodies can grow a heart of their own and regain their humanity. thats cool! kingdom hearts is about the importance of friendship and connections, and all that- so having such a thing have real physical results in the nobodies is a powerful concept. that, and it really does fit with the whole nobody/shadow carl jung representation going on. BUT THATS NOT HOW ITS IMPLEMENTED IN GAME. xemnas in ddd says the body will replace its missing heart at the first chance it gets- not when the nobody makes connections with others. which is why i hate the growing hearts bit, because its very clearly a poorly thought-out escape for the nobodies' major dilemma. same thing with how a person can be recompleted by killing the heartless and nobody. thats fucking insane because it makes it so that the answer to all the organization's problems was to commit seppuku all along!!! nothing of value is lost, everyone is technically immortal if they lose their heart to darkness and split- just shoot their two counterparts and you get to live again. its so bad help alright. i'm starting to lose the point so i will end this here lmfao. long story short, i agree with everything in the video except most of his reasoning that the weird shit at the end of kh2 and postgames made any sense and is justified by the carl jung shadow theory comparison. kthx, watch the video its cool :)

[cyberdragoninfinity]

Sorry if I cant send more then one but Id love your thoughts on the three-in-one bundle andriod family fuckshow

FIRST OF ALL, OBSESSED WITH THE PHASE "THREE-IN-ONE BUNDLE ANDROID FAMILY FUCKSHOW." THEY SURE FUCKIN ARE!!!!!! my fucked up Italians!!! second of all, cannot believe i am saying this but I actually already did one for Jakob/Jose, you can find my thoughts on him over here!!

So for now I will do just tweedle dee and tweedle dipshit over here

LESTERLUCCIANO:

First impression: "ok so this Primo guy is associated with two other guys and one of them is like??? really short??? ok. wait what the fuck do you mean theyre all the same guy hello--"

Impression now: LITTLE FUCKER OF ALL TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! god i love lester so much I love when a yugioh character is just some tiny bastard he's a PERMANENT 12 YEAR OLD he wears ROLLER SKATES FULL TIME he SKATEBOARDS he's RUDE AND MEAN TO EVERYONE his little cackle in his sub voice is DELIGHTFUL. top favorites forever. He is also agonizingly sad and if I think too hard about him I feel unwell.

Favorite moment: Thinking about when Primo loses in the WRGP and Lester starts shrieking at him about how he fucked up the plan and Primo just tells him to stop complaining/stop being petulant and Lester starts LITERALLY SHAKING WITH ABSOLUTE RAGE. THEY WERE HAVING A SHOVING MATCH IMMEDIATELY OFF SCREEN I JUST KNOW IT.

Idea for a story: something about Lester when he was first brought online. What that could have felt like. What would have happened if the implied Mental Blocks That Seal Off the Emperor's Memories weren't active when he first got turned on. Many potential for let's Be Kind of Emo About Lester moments.

Favorite relationship: Lester and Primo's dynamic is genuinely one of my favorite platonic yugioh character relationships, I need to talk more on it sometime. They really brotherpilled those two androids as hard as they possibly could and it makes me explode. Primo stole his card so Lester really just rips his whole deck out of his beat to shit torso. Unhinged Middle Schooler vs. Unhinged 19 Year Old.

Favorite headcanon: bird autism, can do So Many Skateboard Tricks, would pick up bugs and garbage and other shit off the ground and throw them at Primo. Very protective of his hair and knows a bunch of braids and styles. Is absolutely Fucking Terrified of Jakob but will not admit this. Bites. Hard.

PRIMOPLACIDO:

First impression: during his DL event back in 2021 I really was just like "idrk what's going on here with this like. weird 5Ds villain overlord guy. He's got a robot army I guess??? ok. is he like... 30? what is this shit about bees what the hell."

Impression now: that is my BOY my SON my FAILBOT9000 he is PERMANENTLY UNDER 20 he is a gijinka of just how much it sucks to be 19 and angry at everything and I LOVE HIM SO. SO MUCH. DID NOT EXPECT HIM TO BECOME ONE OF MY TOP FAVORITE YGO CHARACTERS BUT HERE WE ARE. he just sucks so bad and nobody likes him and if i also think too hard about him and how agonizingly lonely and fucked up he is I start getting BIG SAD. HE TURNED INTO A FUCKING MOTORCYCLE. SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH HIM. HE DIED BADLY AND CAME BACK BADLY. LOVE THIS ANIMAL. THE PEEM.

Favorite moment: they really gave this poor bastard one of the most 'gruesome' ygo duel loss moments huh. Like he's a robot so it's fine to show it but he did still get RIPPED IN HALF. AND HIS STUPID SWORD SKIDDED ACROSS THE PAVEMENT SOUNDING LIKE A SILVERWARE DRAWER. it makes me bananas. I also rly love the bit when he's working on his secret Ghost Army and Jakob videocalls to yell at him and Primo just looks away like a dog that got caught eating out of the trash.

Idea for a story: oooouughhhh none of yall are ready for the AU simmering in the back of my brain where Leo tries to save a chunk of Aporia's inner robotic hardware to try and bring him back to life, but it's corrupted and incomplete and only brings back Primo. So now you have this miserable postcanon Primo with no deck no sword no NOTHING being shown kindness from Yusei & co and having to live with all of Aporia's memories and knowledge of What He Did. it's so special to me. i need to brew some more on it.

Unpopular opinion: every day. i see this weird idea that Primo is like.... uwu so suave and dainty and delicate??? and it's like....HUH???? this 6 foot tall WEIRD GUY is PART MOTORCYCLE and MEAN AS HELL and UNPLEASANT TO BE AROUND and FUMBLES EVERY SINGLE ONE OF HIS PLANS. let him suck ass!! he's at his best when he sucks!! ALSO THE LIKE. FANDOM IDEA THAT HE LOVES BEES??!? literally every time he talks about insects it's in a derogatory manner for the love of god i am begging for media literacy. im on my hands and knees here.

Favorite relationship: I do love his stupid one-sided rivalry with Yusei it's so fucking funny. But also, again, he and Lester....god. Love them so fucking much. If Primo hated Lester as much as he acts and claims he would not have gone along with his little rich kid's butler bit I just know it (without complaining either!!). You can argue he just tolerates Lester's company but I genuinely think he does like it. even if it's just a little. Based and Big Brother'd. Wahhhh

Favorite headcanon: god where do I start. Autism Beast. Constantly on the verge of an being overstimulated meltdown. Zero volume control. If someone had introduced him to wolves that would have been it, he would have been a complete wolfaboo. Avid watcher of Cool Sword Videos. Built like a pit bull.

[empty-blog-for-lurking]

hi! feel free to ignore this ask, but if you were searching for an excuse to talk about kuron(or anyone else) in your post s8 au ........👀👀👀

*Deep breathe* Do i ever!!!!!!

I actually have an unneccessarily long post in my drafts i am typing out talking about Kuron, (Kuron babygirl please get help😭😭), but the entire thing can boiled down to this- Kuron is someone who desperately wants even needs a semblence of control in his life. Like the entire possession by Haggar and than merging with Shiro? Finding out you are a clone created to replace this guy to destroy the team inside out and be a weapon? Everything you used to think about yourself was a straight up lie? That a recipe of a whole bunch of issues baby!

This man has lost any and every form of agency since the moment he was created. He isnt even sure that he can trust himself or his memories anymore because how can you when you are literally created to be someone else? He doubts every thought he has, every first instinct, every want, because he is never sure if that is him being himself or him being Shiro/controlled by Haggar.

What he is sure about is how angry, hurt, and betrayed he feels by his friends. He is especially hates Keith (who effectively killed him and is the one putting the most emphasis on him being Shiro), Allura (who put Shiro in his body), and Shiro (literally face of like so much of his trauma, the entire "evil clone who replaced me" shit he talks about while in HIS body, and just being merged and locked in his mind was just not a great experience, 0/10 will not recommend) (he also hates Haggar so much, he will throw hands). And this anger is pretty much a crutch to him, because it is the one thing that kept him from fully merging, and is pretty much an assertion of his identity.

He has this weird complicated feeling about Lance, cause well Lance is the one who saved him and he is very grateful for that, but also he has been nursing that hurt for a really long time and just has a really hard time letting it go and he just doesnt trust Lance, he wants to but he really cant. The problems between these two can be solved with few honest conversations because both parties are more willing to listen to each other, but problem is Lance is kinda in a coma and Losing it which is a major L.

He is also trying to find what to do and who he is. He did not expect to survive or get out or get his own body but now that he is out he just doesnt know what to do with this second chance. He's going through motions, trying out new things, anything and everything that just gives him a purpose or something, anything

He wants nothing to do with Shiro, so anything resembling Shiro has to go. He is getting tattoos, piercings, changing his whole aesthetic. Space? Cosmos? The fuck is that? He is Not Interested, no matter how cool as fuck it is, no sir, absolutely Not/sarc. He is doing things Shiro would hate which consequently he also lowkey hates but says he likes it through gritted teeth. These things range from reading classic Lit to getting into bar fights at 3am and it is just "Really! It Is So Fun!!! Shiro is a Massive Wuss and a Little Bitch for Missing Out while i am cool as fuck 😎😎😎😎😎😰- i mean 😎😎😎😎😎😎. Love having individuality and making my own choices under my own violation that have nothing to do with Takashi Shirogane, a guy whom i absolutely Do Not Care about and has Nothing to Do with This or Me" (dont tell him that by doing things against what Shiro would have done he is still letting him influence his decisions, he has to figure that out himself)

So to summerize- Kuron my guy is having a midlife crisis, an identity crisis, a what to do with your life crisis, a teenage rebellion phase all at the same time, which is a real Bruh moment of him.

[sailor-kaiju]

@razorblade-skies asked me to explain my examples from the comments, and I didn’t wanna lose it in the little reply box on my phone

This will be HELLA spoilery, obvs.

And yes I’d loie to babble more about them |D

This is my list for people wanting more examples:

Momento-

Momento is a movie about a man who has no ability to make new memories who is trying to hunt down his wife’s killer through hints he has left himself. Throughout the movie we are shown and told realities he doesn’t know, but we don’t have the context for them, especially with unreliable narrators. When you realize that he accidentally killed his wife by giving her too much medication because of his memory issues, many earlier scenes are VERY different.

Perfect Blue-

Perfect Blue is about a Japanese Pop Idol who quits her singing job to become an actress.

there are a few possible, VERY different meanings to the same set of events. Depending on which one is real, you may be seeing one very different thing unfolding than what you think.

Steven Universe-

It has been a minute since I made this post and some of SU is not as fresh in my mind as when I made the OG comment BUT I believe I was talking about the identity of Pink Diamond. There are a lot of massive spoiler level hints before you have the context (especially about Gem culture” to understand.

6th sense-

“I see dead people.” Told to the dead person he is looking directly at.

There’s more but honestly…that’s pretty dang on the nose.

Devilman etc-

A guys weird ass bestie makes him a not-evil monster to fight evil monsters. His bestie is secretly Satan. This is shown a lot before you’re told but also nobody assumed that shit was on the table.

Even tho it’s called Devilman and maybe we should have.

A lot of the anime influenced by it I mentioned also plays with “The big, true enemy is in plain site and usually bragging about it.” vibe. Special mention to half of Clamp’s work.

Shout out to Evangelion, the classic fucked up robot Kaiju anime which may be like 50% “none of this makes sense until it all makes terrible sense” tbh

The Others-

The Others is about an Edwardian mother and her children, who both have a severe sensitivity to light, living alone (besides a three house workers) in a giant house the mom keeps locked tight in these intense layers to keep the light away. The father is away at war, and mom is clearly already at whits end when they start being haunted, the doors left open, etc

The whole movie has the vibe but particularly a scene where the father comes home and has a strange conversation with the mother before just…wandering away.

Turns out they are the ghosts. The father died in the war. He was coming to say good bye but couldn’t communicate with her because she was no where near accepting being dead.

Westworld (The TV show, I have not seen the old movie)-

A company opens a theme park where perfectly human robots act out western fantasies for rich guests.

While there are interesting mind games with the “who is robot who is human” angle, this happens a lot more with time shenanigans. About half way through the show you suddenly realize what you thought was all one time line (assumed naturally by viewers relying on the fact that a good chunk of the characters aren’t aging)

In fact it is several time lines over MANY years, and multiple “different” characters are actually the same guests coming different years and playing out different fantasies. the robots (the majority of the character’s) don’t age and have their memories regularly reset.

Including the love interest (coming his first time in his 20s and playing out a romance story) ALSO being the awful villian (visiting in his 60s, bored with the normal plots and now playing an evil run)

Bonus point: the Robots are literally programmed to this trope. If they see something that would break their illusion (a picture of a McDonald’s for example) they can’t process it. “It doesn’t look like anything to me.”

Arrival is also a good example. Alien ls come to Earth, and create a story line where time is fluid in ways we don’t realize at first.

oh i never know how to explain this properly but i looooooooooooooooove when a story just absolutely TELLS you something and it’s so obvious it goes right by you. like the equivalent of hiding in plain sight. i’m thinking in the original cut(?) of alien where they showed the full xenomorph, crouched and ready to pounce, but because we’ve never seen it before, we can’t tell what it is and interpret it as part of the spaceship. or it’s a detail that seems so out of place or wildly insane that you automatically ignore it and assume you misinterpreted until that exact detail comes back in a big way? (like when noah the raven boy flat out tells everyone he’s a ghost and they take it as a joke, so the reader does too) is there a tvtropes name for this i’m obsessed with it

[lou-blooms-bitch]

ramble/rant/vent ??

whatever that’s absurd

anyways i don’t like how shallow everything is now. like you’ll see how like smooth brained people are and just how little common sense they have and you’ll think you’re going crazy cuz ur just like there’s no way people are actually this dumb but jesus christ they are

soz ramble but you’ll see that and then you’ll see how like media and shit just doesn’t feel as like THERE iykwim… like in 2016 there used to be youtube for yk youtube videos and then instagram for yk posting pictures and then vine for short funny videos

but now like everything’s moved to tiktok and then that’s just a whole other thing cuz then from that you get youtube shorts, then reels, then that fuckass one on snapchat like it’s all just short quick things and even fucking music is too like songs are so short now and even i will admit i can’t stay for long songs (although jesus of suburbia is fantastic and i will listen to it all the way through) but you get my point.. everything is just so short now and because of that it feels shallow too. it doesn’t feel like there’s really any substance to what’s being shown anymore and it honestly sucks

and then another thing i feel like covid and quarantine and shit just slowed everyone down more. i feel like covid made EVERYONE lose a few braincells… but especially since covid people have been getting more and more fucking moronic by the week and it’s just embarrassing at this point

like wdym some 7 year olds can’t fucking read lol. like i mean yeah i get if they don’t want to like fuck i ever wanted to but at least i was able to ?? lmao whatever kids are fucking idiots

but still that could def tie in with covid cuz yk developmental years and stuff and then some parents are lazy which fair fucks i am too so ugh whatevs

but people are just so slow now. people just consume what’s put in front of them as long as it’s a screen they’ll engage with it. and i don’t even know why im saying they’re.. im literally one of them.

but either way i feel like every single person out there just lost everything that made them substantial. content creators, musicians (not really but def a few), lowkey kinda directors too but that’s comparing movies now to movies from like fuckin 30 years ago so do with that what you will but whatever you do don’t deny me when i say covid and the rise of tiktok and short form media that stemmed from within that 1000000% made people more fucktarded and now just push out and consume whatever the fucks given to them

and i could go into a whole other page on the same chapter about the internet itself and how memes only seem to last 3 fucking weeks now instead of older brainrot like big chungus that lasted for definitely over a month at least idk my memories shit but you get my point… but yeah i could go into that just really not bothered to at the moment. it’s a very broad thing in my head.. lots of things stemming from one another. weird.

well

[cr0ftisprocrastinating]

Hello, me again being just perfectly normal as per usual.

I just finished listening to your INCREDIBLE playlist for HDG, and it's... did I already say incredible? It is very incredible. Wildly eclectic in all the best possible ways. I was SO PLEASED to see Babylon Zoo and Kula Shaker in particular! (no Tattva though?? how dare you it was the first guitar solo I ever learned) Anyway it brought back many many memories, so please find them all enclosed lol

I'm on holiday and have LOTS of time to kill, so I have constructed a sectioned, annotated list ❤️

The Best Song

Reef - Place your hands

I think this might be the best song ever made in the 90s? It's lived in my head forever. APPARENTLY the lyrics are "place your hands on my hope" but I have been singing "on my hole" for so fucking long and I will not change now. Those are the real lyrics as far as I’m concerned. Anyway it’s so joyful!

Songs that people don't remember until they hear them

Suede - Beautiful Ones - The chorus definitely rings through Hermione’s head whenever a Slytherin walks into the room lmao

Supergrass - Alright - I feel like I heard this song every single day for a decade

Stone Roses - She Bangs the Drums - Their most pop song and holy shit its good

Ocean Colour Scene - Riverboat song - Not only amazing, but also the intro riff was the soundtrack to TFI Friday with that bastard Chris Evans (the other one)

Corner Shop - Brimful of Asha - Oh god this song hahah. Another one that was played so much it just became the general background noise of life

The Seahorses - Love is the law - I dunno if anyone even remembers John Squire had another band after the Stone Roses, but he did and this track was the only song of theirs I ever heard but it was enough that I remember them

Catatonia - Mulder and Scully - Is there anything more 90s than the X-Files?

The Divine Comedy - Something For the Weekend - Inextricably linked with the above in my head for reasons I can't remember. Maybe just because they're both spooky??

The Mavericks - Dance the Night Away - The happiest break up song ever made?

Juggernauts of the era

I mean these need no explanation so I mostly haven't bothered, but Bittersweet Symphony was literally the sound of an entire generation (and the music video? Just walking down a shitty street, disconnected from everyone around him, singing about hopelessness while dressed all in black, barging uncaringly past people??? IT MEEEE lol). Also a reminder that Things Can Only Get Better was the Labour Party song when everyone thought Tony Blair would save us from the conservatives 🙄

Verve - Bittersweet Symphony

Oasis - Cigarettes & Alcohol

Blur - Girls and Boys

Pulp - Common People - 🎵 Rent a flat above a shop, cut your hair and get a job 🎵

Prince - 1999

DReam - Things Can Only Get Better

Songs I don't think necessarily fit your playlist vibe but I remember fondly anyway

Radiohead - Fake Plastic Trees - One of my faves, it’s so fucking depressing lol. “She lives with a broken man, a cracked polystyrene man” 🥹

Ace of Base - All That She Wants - My dad loved Ace of Base for some reason? Which was weird because he mostly just listened to Pavarotti

4 Non Blondes - What's up - Still find myself regularly singing Heeeeeeeeayyy yeaaaah yeaaah yeahhh constantly 

The Shamen - Ebeneezer Goode - E’s are good, gettit??? It’s such a blatant, smirking middle-finger to The Establishment that you’ve got to kinda love it, even if it’s fucking irritating to actually listen to hahah

Shaggy - Oh Carolina

Wet Wet Wet - Goodnight Girl - I did NOT listen to Wet Wet Wet. But my mum did, and this song was in heavy rotation, so I still know all the lyrics

And as this is an ask, I've prepared an actual question! Do you listen to music while you're writing? I can't, I get too distracted by the lyrics and I lose the ability to write words!

OK that's it I'm done have fun! <3 xx

Stars…your name is fitting because you are what?? HEAVENLY.

I will be adding all of these to the playlist tomorrow. Even if they don’t ‘fit the vibe’. The vibe of the playlist is - there is no vibe! It’s like what if Hermione and Theo bought every single weird mashup CD to occupy them in their little copy room, and therefore ANY and ALL bangers are welcomed hehe.

Re: writing to music - it depends on my mood! When I am struggling to get words down I definitely think it helps to focus me in the right ‘tone’. For NETG I used that miserable playlist a LOT lmao. Sometimes I get overexcited though and have to ‘dance around my room’ - a thing I have done my entire life and is not dancing at all, rather me hurtling from one end of my room to another, grinning madly as the made up people in my head do things I want them to.

I always try and convince myself I can listen to music while I study. This is always a lie. One day I’ll grow out of it, but not today

[genshrineimpact]

universe abound

| ◆ ch.5 ⑊ high tea.

⬙⤠ masterlist ⤝⬙

◇ a/n ◇ how do writers build such intricate worlds i am literally pulling my hair rn trying to connect the dots and covering the plot holes sldkfjlsdkf no one look

"your grace-"

"[name]."

"how could i dare to speak the sacred name with this lowly tongue of mi-"

"beel."

the joy that spreads across her expression just from a single mutter of her name makes you feel a little awkward. you weren't even saying it in a pleasant tone, more of a ‘parent scolding a child’ type of tone… you used to find the cultish and worshipping tendencies of sagau romantic, but to actually receive the treatment like this… it feels a little daunting.

"that is my name, yes!"

"hey! how come she gets called by name and not me! i, for one, will gladly call you by name as much as you want!" barbatos puffs out his chest proudly, throwing you his signature wide smile. you’re still not used to this version of him - you have definitely seen this particular skin before, but you never really owned it, seeing as by that time you had other higher priorities to use your money for instead of using them to buy clothes for a fictional character.

that's so weird to think of.

"[name]? ehe, you're staring… does this appearance please you~?"

".... eh?"

"i thought you'd like it, cause the last time an outsider visited, they had this look and you sounded so excited and happy to see him... so i decided to copy them! well, with a few modifications of course~" he motions towards the crystal cores on his braids, smiling as he's recalling an old memory, "you used to laugh whenever i start chasing around the crystalflies, remember? i couldn't help but take a few, i thought you'd like it!"

you want to question so many things in that sentence. like, what did he mean by an outsider visiting? when is this last time he spoke of? what did he mean by you sounding excited and happy? and when did you ever see him chase after crystalflies? was there such an event in the game? why is he speaking as if he’s met you in person before when you've never-

a pinming cup is elegantly served in front of you with a soft clink. your eyes trail up the arm sporting bright colored geo lines to meet morax’s amber-gold eyes, and he offers you a gentle smile.

wow, he’s so beautiful up close.

"oh. i… am glad you think so, [name]."

oh shit, did you just say that outloud?!

"[name], [name], what about me??"

you palm your heated cheeks and decide to abandon your shame altogether. fuck it, if you’re going to be here for a while - which it looks like you will be - then you might as well live out your younger self’s daydreams of interacting and spoiling these ‘fictional’ characters, "you're pretty too, barbatos. and you too, beel."

if only you had your phone with you now, so you can capture the beautiful sight of raiden ei herself blushing, eyes crinkling in a smile, shyly hidden behind her palm covering her lips. on your other side, venti himself has for once quietened down, opting to beam at you with both of his palms supporting his chin, elbows leaning against the table, faint pink dusting his cheeks and a lovesick grin on his lips.

morax sits at the last open seat across from you, still wearing the same smile as before, and you wish you could screenshot this picture-perfect scene, share it online and watch as people lose their minds. because it feels like you're starting to lose your mind right this moment.

"so, [name]. though we are more than joyous that you’ve decided to return, it would be nice to have some… explanation, regarding what has been going on. and perhaps plan our next course of actions."

morax’s calming voice does nothing to quell the sudden spike in your heart rate.

explanation? they want you to explain… what exactly? if anything, you were the one who should be hoping for an explanation. you came to this world because of the game, right? you didn't want to be here in the first place…

"i… can’t."

"your grace, please rest assured, you can trust us completely-"

"i’ll be completely honest. i can't give you any explanation because i have no idea why or how is it that i am here with you right now."

your confession brings a sudden silence over the group.

this time, the anemo archon is the one who reacts first. leaning closer onto your side, eyes wide, he tries to meet your eyes, "b-but- didn't you hear our prayers? received our offerings? isn't that why you came back?"

prayers and offerings.

you think back to the notifications you received. you suppose you can call them prayers, to some extent, although you’ve never seen it as such before this. so the 'person' behind those were… the inhabitants of teyvat themselves? and the free gifts were offerings from them?

… regardless of whom those pings came from, they were the reason why you tried to open the game. so technically, you can say that barbatos is correct, right?

you were about to nod when morax's question intercepted the motion, a slight frown forming between his eyebrows as he observes your expression.

"[name], are you aware of the state of teyvat right now?"

the geo archon’s question triggers a flutter of scenery that you’ve seen through the led screen of your device. they flash before your eyes and you briefly feel the hot lead of guilt filling your stomach. that was… what, months ago? a year? time usually passes faster in the game than in real life, but is that really the case here? because if so, you don't really want to know how the current situation is.

you decide there's no point in lying, so you nod, "just the… gist of it. i know that things aren't… good."

"... forgive me if this sounds intrusive, however, i must ask - where have you been prior to today, [name]? we haven't seen you in person ever since…. ever since you ascended celestia," he sounded… pained, when he says this, and you observe his neutral facade in confusion.

not ‘ascended to celestia’, but ‘ascended celestia’ itself? you might not remember all the lores anymore, but you could've sworn nothing mentioned that.

but then again, the original lore never mentioned the existence of a divine creator or anything pointing to such a being.

"i… i’m not…. i don’t……."

the words are tethering at the tip of your tongue, but something holds them back from spilling out. a dark thought crosses your mind, the possibility making you freeze in fear for a second.

so far, you only know that the game - or whoever it is - that's responsible for bringing you here, actually went through with it because it thinks that you can save this world, in one way or another. knowing this, you can certainly choose to go along with this whole charade; to just play your part and maybe if you're lucky you’ll get some kind of more concrete instructions on what exactly it is that you're supposed to do to ‘save teyvat’. but…

on the chance that it is mistaken, and you're not this all-divine being, the moment the real one arrives, what will become of you?

will you be tossed aside? burned at the stake? stoned to death? electrified into a crisp by beelzebul? stabbed through morax's spear? tossed down starsnatch cliff by barbatos?

you shudder. reading about those 'bad ends' in fiction works was one hell of an experience in itself, but having the possibility of those events actually happening to you is enough to make you rethink your whole plan of action. there's no guarantee that these three will believe you and there's also a possibility that they'll turn back on you the moment you tell them the truth. but lying to them just feels… wrong. and just as risky.

"before that… first, answer me this. how do you know that i'm…. well… me, and not just some… impostor… who's pretending to be the creator?"

the three archons look as if you've just slapped them right on their face. flabbergasted and looking borderline offended, morax - as expected - is the first to compose himself, and he scrambles to pick his words carefully.

"how? but… how could we not? we could never forget your voice, your grace. just as how crystalflies would gather around areas abundant with the energy of their respective elemental types, our very being always yearns to be in your very presence. it is simply the law of nature."

"the aforesaid. there is no question that you’re the divine creator. even i who have not met you directly before this occasion knows that you are, without a doubt, the one who has been guiding me all these times," beel explains with conviction, purple eyes crackling with electro, "please rest assured, if such a sinful being dare to appear in front of your eyes, i will strike it down at once and vaporize them to dust."

her words bring a certain scene at tenshukaku to mind, and you shudder. your silence only deepens the furrows on the two gods' foreheads, and they glance at each other in silence, wondering if they had somehow aggrieved you with their words. in an attempt to do damage control, barbatos inches his hand towards your side of the table and speaks to you in a gentle tone.

"[name]... your appearance may change and you may look like just a normal human being, but the whole teyvat will always recognize you as its master. and that includes its people - meaning, us! you are, undoubtedly, the one and only creator of this teyvat. this barbatos guarantees it! so… so, please, don't look so scared of us, okay?"

your eyes flick between the anemo archon and your steaming cup of tea as your brain tries to come up with a reply. you'd never pegged him of all people to be as observant as he is now… or perhaps your expressions aren't as controlled as you thought.

all this thinking and speculation exhausts you. already, you can feel a tightness at both sides of your head, a warning sign of an incoming stress headache. with a loud sigh, you slump backward onto your chair, hands raised in a surrendering motion.

"fine. i'll tell you what happened from my perspective… with one condition. i want you all to promise me. me, not as your 'god' or 'creator' or any 'divine being', but as… a friend. promise me that whatever happens in the future, you won't hurt me."

"hurt you?! my liege…," the dark purple-haired god shrinks on her seat when you give her a stern look following her outburst. meanwhile, the other two look just as petrified at the prospect of you asking them to swear that they won't do such sacrilegious action.

it finally dawns on them that you do not trust them.

".... very well. if it will ease your heart, as the god of contracts, i shall oversee this promise to ensure that it is held. a binding contract between us and a single individual - [name]."

you can feel some tension leave your body at morax's declaration. in your frazzled state, it seems that you have forgotten about that option. contracts - yes, that could come in handy, you'll have to remember it. you'd like to believe that based on his lore and character, morax would never break a contract, especially the ones he has set personally.

so for now, you should be safe…

"great. now… it's up to you to believe me or not. but i really hope you do and won't think that i'm being delusional, or something."

and so, you began your story. starting from the very beginning. your identity, your life back on earth (though you skipped telling them a lot of things there, because you don't have the energy nor memory capacity to narrate all the years you've lived in - how the hell does morax remember all his 6000 years of life??), how you found out about genshin and started playing it (it took a while to explain this because you can see the confusion in their faces whenever you said certain words like 'video game' or 'server'), how years passed and how it was supposed to be terminated but somehow only you could still access it, how you then started receiving the strange notifications…

you're fully aware that it isn't the wisest decision to lay all your cards on the table like this, but as you glance up at them in between words and find them looking back at you so intently, as if they're hanging on to every single one of your words… it warms your heart and pushes you to tell them the whole truth.

there's a glimmer of recognition in morax's eyes as you tell him about your visit to liyue. he says nothing and lets you continue talking, but there's a solemn smile that tugs on his expression when you stutter on your words, the sadness of seeing liyue so broken evident in your tone. 

you're actually talking to them.

they're actually able to hear you.

this used to be what your younger self wished for the most. you remember it well. the longing to be able to converse and interact with them, to experience teyvat in all its entirety. maybe if this whole thing happened then, you would have eagerly taken the mantle of the 'divine creator' without as much thought.

you're supposed to be all grown up now, but it seems like that yearning never truly left you. perhaps once you've passed a certain treshold, age is truly just that, a meaningless number that matters little, in the grand scheme of things.

by the time you finish, your throat is dry and the tea has gone cold. the four of you fall into silence, each of you with your own thoughts. you sigh and sip on the now-cold tea, silently waving your hand when morax notices the state of your drink and tries to stand, probably to brew you a fresh batch. he sits back obediently and regards you with a calm gaze.

"i understand now that this must be very confusing to you. we've burdened you without knowing. please accept our apologies."

you head shakes automatically and relief floods your veins, creating a small grin on your lips, "you didn't know. it's fine. so you… believe me? you don't think i'm crazy?"

"of course. this explains your hesitance and… aloofness."

"ahaha… sorry about that…"

"i'm sad that you don't remember the older times, but i believe you, [name]!" barbatos smiles, though it's not as bright as his previous ones.

"i... share the same sentiment," beelzebul fixes her gaze on you, "it appears there are some mysteries that need to be solved regarding this matter. but if i may be so insolent as to suggest, i think the matter of teyvat is more of a priority at this moment."

you understand what she meant by her words immediately, and a hopeless sigh left you.

"but i don't know what i'm supposed to do. do you really believe that i can save a whole world, when i've been living a normal life so far?" you raise your eyebrows at her, arms crossing loosely on the table as you lean forward onto it, "from my perspective at the moment, i'm powerless."

beel doesn't look at all convinced, but it was morax who speaks for her, his chin lightly resting on his other fingers which are curled underneath, as his index slowly taps onto the corner of his lips.

"if i may suggest a theory… perhaps you’ve just yet to regain back all of your powers upon setting your feet back into teyvat."

"but what if i don't have my powers anymore? or any powers whatsoever in the first place?"

"oh, but you certainly do. we're here in your abode, are we not?" he chuckles, eyes soft as his voice takes a nostalgic tone, "the sub-space creation was something you taught me a long time ago. this particular one was created by yourself. in fact, i've had the honor of visiting it quite a few times in the past, along with barbatos and a few others, to partake in various festivities hosted by yours truly…….. however, as i was saying, the sub-space needs to feed from the owner's power to continue to exist. so the fact that we're able to converse like this here…"

"aha! this realm itself is proof that you do have your powers!" barbatos exclaims, snapping his fingers in excitement and turning towards you as if waiting for your praise. across from him, beelzebul lightly pouts, and you have an inkling she's somehow upset that she's the only one who hasn't had the chance to meet you and be involved with whatever festivities morax talked about within this realm, a long time ago...

"i… i see. i didn't know that," you scratch your cheek and look down contemplatively at your crossed arms, "then… do you have any suggestions on how to… maybe regain my power? or see if it really is my power?"

"i believe getting reacquainted to teyvat itself should help. even i am not privy to the inner workings of your power, so i do not know much about it. but what i do know is that you're the one who initiates us as allogenes and you have a strong connection with teyvat, with it being your first ever creation."

you nod, knowing the implications behind his words and the pleading looks from the two sitting by your sides. they want you to visit teyvat. in the end, it all comes down to that.

"okay. i'll do it. mond, liyue, inazuma, sumeru, snezhnaya, natlan, fontaine - all seven of them, i'll go and hopefully we can figure out something."

suddenly, you blink and cast your gaze toward all three of them.

"by the way… where are the other four archons?"

a heavy silence blankets over the previously light atmosphere. another shiver travels up your spine upon seeing the solemn expressions of your beloved characters.

"[name]... though this is a regretful outcome, please understand that none of us wish for you to take the blame for it."

morax materializes a pouch sewn from some sort of intricate-looking cloth and unties the string keeping its contents from spilling, before letting them fall onto the table.

you can't help the horrified gasp that escapes your lips at the sight of four gnosis, each bearing different colors and yet all missing its luster.

green, red, and two shades of blue.

dendro, pyro, hydro and cryo.

your head spins.

"but," you barely manage to whisper; it feels like cotton is rapidly stuffing your lungs as you speak, "wh-what of the… their nations, their people-"

"i’m afraid…"

".... they’ve all been destroyed."

© genshrineimpact | 2022 ◆ no repost. reblogs much appreciated. feel free to reach out to submit suggestions, feedback, comments, or if you just want to talk!

◇ taglist ◇ @paintingsofdragonspine | @genshinparty | @abyssmal-skies

ps. if you want to be removed/added from the taglist, just send an ask or dm me!

[postsforposting]

Maggie acts like she walked out of a fanfiction meetcute, "I'm desperately in love with this person I literally just saw". Nina introduces herself to Maggie, which confirms that they have not officially/personally met--Maggie cannot know anything about her, Nina wouldn't feel the need to say "this is my name".

I think it's been confirmed that the record shop did not exist in s1? There is some kind of store there, it looks like the name is VINYL FET* something, but it's not Maggie's.

Here is one of the very few flashes we get of it in s1, e4 41:47:

I am not sure if it's the same name after the reboot in s1, e6 27:16:

Even if it is only there after the reboot, that still means she wasn't originally there. Blowing up the picture, I am pretty sure that's still the same VINYL name based on how big the lettering is, and the lack of obvious swirly stuff.

In s2, the name gets an obvious change, though the facade is the same, e1 29:35:

and 29:47:

That's not the same shop as in S1.

Maggie is full of shit, or something happened to reset reality again, or people got miracled to think Maggie has always been there when she has not. When Azi first goes to her shop, he does seem to be looking around like it's brand new to him as if he's never been there.

So either she's been stalking Nina like a celestial would, or like a human would, or there's something fucky going on with memory and Maggie is retaining the echoes of strong love just like Jim does.

I actually do think that this whole season is a series of mind wiping of everyone, and what we're watching is either sequential retakes of the same series of events until someone (Metatron) gets the outcome they want, or a little more wacky, it's memories being wiped, replayed, and rearranged like you would rearrange scenes in movie during editing:

we also know that losing your memories doesn't erase time or reset anything that happens in reality, it merely makes it so that you forget it happened, creating APPARENT time loops without real time loops. time does not get reset if you get memory wiped. it's a budget time loop, if you will. i think that's what's actually happening: not true sci fi time loops, but referee's replays. director's loops, retakes. action!, take one, take two, etc. this would explain why there's evidence of "previous time loops" but nobody remembers them. heaven's fucking with everyone, including hell. which implies you can erase memories on earth. which ought to have been obvious, we've seen crowley and aziraphale make people forget things: the nun who is now nina in s1 forgot seeing crowley and aziraphale during the paintball scene. this is why hell is understaffed: combine retakes with repeated permanent discorporation, you get lack of staff. shax originally asked for a legion after being assigned to take specifically an army of the damned to attack, and it dropped to 70. how many times did an eric die in the shop? metatron only knows. this also explains why nina and maggie couldn't be miracled to forget the demon attack during the ball: if heaven is already screwing with people treating this as a movie, they could have done a miracle to prevent anyone else from messing with memories, so that they ensure they get what they want. it's not a miracle block, so miracles don't bounce like they do in blocks, it's more like adam's being hidden protection in s1. ... if you can wipe memory, can you selectively wipe it? is heaven recutting memory to create a "reality" that suits them--because if people remember it one way, then what's the difference if it actually happened in reality or not?--you know, just like how movies are shot out of order and what we see in the end is what we're given, not what actually happened. are we possibly watching a mosaic of memories, rather than reality, rather than real time? it would explain the weird time, because memories stretch and compress time according to how you feel about the memory and why no one notices the repeating outfits, because that's not a detail you're going to remember, and what you do remember is people in perhaps their favorite outfit. it would explain why we don't hear god's narration, because your own voice is the narration in your own memory. the new sound effect when crowley takes his glasses off could be because that's his memory, and he inserts a cool soundtrack to his life. could even be azi's memory, because we know azi thinks of him as more suave than he is. perhaps the sad clock or the weird details is whoever's memory trying to send a subconscious message that something isn't right here.

There are so many posts about the weirdness around Nina and Maggie, but the thing that has always bothered me the most is that both of them know Aziraphale but neither one of them seems to know Crowley. Like, at ALL. Not even by sight. Which doesn’t make any sense. For the last four years, Crowley has basically been unemployed and homeless (this sentence made me so sad to type). He has had literally NOTHING to do except hang out at Aziraphale’s bookshop. And the vibe at the beginning of s2 is that he’s there a LOT. Like, multiple times per week (“we both get plenty of use out of it, don’t we”). When Aziraphale calls him in the first episode, he says “2 minutes” the way you tell your spouse how long until you’re home from the grocery store, especially if you were on your way home already.

The dialogue goes to great lengths to highlight that Nina and Maggie SHOULD know Crowley, which just heightens the weirdness of it. When they're at the pub, Crowley asks Aziraphale, “What’s wrong with the cafe?” (implying they usually go to the cafe), but Aziraphale made a point of introducing Crowley to Nina in the first episode. And Nina makes a point of saying to Maggie that she always remembers “the regulars," but she doesn't seem to remember Crowley. Of course, she immediately notices both Jim and Muriel outside the bookshop, so she's clearly paying attention to what's happening in the neighborhood and it seems like she couldn't have failed to spot him coming and going all the time.

And Maggie's situation is even weirder. Her whole back story is that she basically grew up IN the bookshop because her grandmother’s record store was essentially in a corner of the bookshop. And yet, when Maggie and Nina see Crowley on the street right before the lightning strike, Nina says, “Do you see that bloke? Six shots of espresso and he's smoking,” and Maggie responds, “I think that man was just struck by lightning.” Which is something you say about someone you’ve never laid eyes on before. She didn’t say, “Oh, that’s Mr. Fell’s friend,” or “I’ve seen him around. He stops by Mr. Fell’s shop a lot.” And then when he comes back, "It's him. The one who was just struck by lightning. The six shots of espresso." Again, no flash of recognition of anything before the current day. This happens immediately after she's just told Nina about knowing Aziraphale since she was little. It’s just weird. Why build a back story that would put her in extremely close proximity to Crowley LITERALLY her entire life and then write dialogue that makes it clear she's never laid eyes on him before?

You could maybe think, well they're just so used to having to hide...but then I asked myself: Does it make sense that the day that you find out there is an extremely dangerous, existence-threatening problem hiding out in your ineffable husband's bookshop is also the day that you would decide to STOP keeping a low profile and start wandering the streets with abandon, introducing yourself to all the local shopkeepers, and ferrying large plants into and out of said bookshop? No. No, it does not.

In any other show, you could assume that the writers just didn’t think about it very carefully. But, given the layers and layers of meaning and symbolism baked into every detail of this show, from the dialogue, to the costuming, the set design, lighting, blocking, etc., and the way that the story folds back on itself again and again, it just feels significant.

[klitzcore]

Character: Eli Brooks

Prompt: Eli Brooks relationship HC'S + First kiss!

A/N: when I say he's an idiot, I mean it lovingly. He's great

Eli wasn't even sure how he ended up with you, nor did anyone else, considering he was a fucking idiot.

You sure did love him, no matter how.. irritating he could be some day.

He finds you so beautiful, absolutely infatuated with you. Eli likes complimenting your features.

He also loves showing you off. He'll be like "Look how beautiful they are, look! You aren't looking!"

For dates, you and Eli do dumb shit together. A highlight has to be when the two of you rode a shopping cart down a hill, or the one time you two swam in the ocean at 2am.

Why, you may ask? For shits and giggles.

Eli's all over you, all the time. He loves physical affection, it's one of his favorite things! He'll literally jump into your arms after he hasn't seen you for awhile.

He's constantly taking pictures of you. Eli likes saving the memory, he has tons of polaroids in his room of you or you two together.

You steal his hat sometimes. You also steal his jackets and button ups. You like sleeping in them, they're comfortable.

He absolutely loves it.

Eli says random things all the time. "Healthy minds make sexy bodies!"

He's so weird. You find yourself giving him back rides a lot, you wear him like a backpack.

You're in yearbook. You do a lot of the organization, god knows your boyfriend will never be organized.

You hang out with him and his friends a lot! You adore his group.

You and him always dance together in his room. Not anything good, no it's always absolutely horrible.

He always needs to be doing something, Eli is very fidgety.

Eli will defend you with his entire being. He knows that he'll get absolutely folded, but he'll still throw himself into the fray.

But when you two do lay down, he's always the little spoon. Absolutely no objections, he needs to be held.

You two often play fight. He mostly always loses.

You two had your first kiss when the tape he directed blew up. It was a massive success, you were so proud.

So when he got his copy, he showed you it. He didn't make you watch it, just handed you the tape.

"Is this it?" You ask him, eyeing him. His grin grows "Hell yeah it is, look-"

You cut him off by smashing your lips against his, throwing your arms around the back of his neck to pull him closer to you. This was a change, but a welcome one! He didn't know what to do!

When he kissed Klitz that one time, it was a joke. It didn't count. But now his first actual kiss, and he was frozen.

So when you parted, you looked at him, kinda concerned. "Wait, I'm so sorry Eli! I'll talk to you later." You say, backing up from him. You turn around, getting ready to start collecting your things, when you hear him say something.

"Wait! Sorry.. sorry, I just. I froze. I've never.. kissed anyone seriously before." He says, cringing as the words left his mouth. How was he going to be a director and never have his first kiss?

"Can we try again?" He asks, this time his voice quieter.

You turn around to face him, nodding. He approaches you, standing flush to your body. "Do I just like.." He asks, trying to find the words.

"Just follow my lead, okay?" You say, smiling at him. You once again connected your lips with his, and this time he pushed back gently. Eli closes his eyes, and he puts his hands on your shoulders. Your hands snake their way around his waist, pulling him closer to you.

Eli pulls away, looking up at you with a smile on his face.

"Can we call that the first one?" He asks. You roll your eyes and nod yes, a smile curling onto your face.

[gece-misin-nesin]

I'm imagining an au where there are ACTUAL trials in evils theatre.

But what is weird is that the dead... seem to come back to life for trials to defend themselves, defend others or even sue people?

At first the theatre crew and the dead are like "yo wtf" but they get used to it. Most of the dead are in trials once or twice but there are several of them who are there A LOT.

Also by triaI mean someone says:

(Insert Name) is guilty of this and this

And then everyone involved participates in the discussion like: were they actually guilty, their reasons, outside reasons and what the victim says etc.

So my ideas for this:

Michaela is a regular member, forming a body out of roots and shit to either participate or observe trials bc that's how she gets amusement out of life as a tree

Gammon managed to get Lilith a guily verdict over the green hunting, she didn't speak to him for a month(no one knows if it was bc she regretted it or bc she was angry at him or both)

The punishment for being found guilty is cleaning and doing the chores of the theatre for a week

Gammon constantly tries to get the theatre members convicted bc of this

Nemesis regains her memories bc i want her to once every two months and causes the BIGGEST trials bc she has dirt on everyone

She once got Irina(who isn't always the judge) to be convicted for the Lioness Burning Incident

Gumillia is sick of this bs because she gets summoned to trials all the damn time bc of her partnership w Seth

When they need to call a dead person as witness they just shout that person's name and they appear

Everyone thinks it Gumillia raising the dead but its actually Luna Hazuki bc this is the most fun she has had in a millenium

She just watches everything from her secret base

If a dead person is found guilty, the entire court has to individually insult said person

Ron Grapple once accused Hansel and Gretel of his murder and won the case bc he was ABC's son and Irina liked him

The graveyard crew were shocked

Nyoze the loop octopus version once cleared up a case about the 7th project MA and never came again

Gammon couldn't process it

Michelle Marlon got MA convicted for not paying child support on two different occasions

Rahab Barisol once emerged out of MA and shit talked Lich

Clarith was accused of not being on the side of justice bc she didn't kill Riliane, coincidentially, Michaela went apeshit in that trial

Clarith also testified that riliane repented which had some ppl surprised

Ma tried to convict gretel for the murder of Mariam, they called her spirit and she literally said "idc"

Behemo makes Ace Attorney references whenever he's there

"That autopsy report is...OUTDATED!"

Nemesis was convicted for the destruction of Levianta(the Magic Kingdom)

Germaine sues Irina for all sorts of shit

No one managed to call on Allen Avadonia

Luna and Sickle kinda argued on this but Luna respected Sickle's decision(basically torturing a 14 year old :/)

They summomed Gallerian multiple times and his response was always "lmao who cares? im evil and i embrace it"

Irina can never trash talk him when he loses trials

Adam managed to get Gammon convicted for identity fraud bc of his past life...somehow

It was total bull and everyone knew that he had bribed Irina

Adam also got Seth convicted for child abuse

Dozens of women sued Venomania and he never won

Not even once

He did win a case against his asshole father though

Muzuri Conchita sued Irina for the curse on his household and he won the case

Elluka Chirclatia sued Nemesis, Mayrana Blossom and Ma for understandable reasons

Pride arc people sued the shit out of Prim, she didn't manage to win ANYTHING

Interestingly, the most ferocious person during her stuff was Banica bc of what she had done to Ney

Lemy sued Gumillia for his murder but the court was so split that they decided to convict neither side and never brought up the case again

It just gave everyone migraines

Adam and Eve tried to sue H&G for their murders but then H&G sued them for neglect, so they called it even

Eve was nearly convicted for the Toragay incident but no one could prove it was her (Nemesis wasn't there and Irina was interested in her defense)

Loki Freezis and Gallerian Marlon had an epic stand off

Kayo Sudou apologised for murdering Mei, Rin and Miku Miroku so they gave her a less harsh sentence which involved only the 3 victims insulting her

No one cared about Kai's death

The Pere Noel members of the 1st iteration(bc most members of the second are all alive until 999) had a LOT of cases

Kaspar tried to make a case against Eve but ignoring that he couldn't prove it was her, no one in the court sympathized with him

Eve and Adam had a shouting match with Seth cheering on from the sidelines until they realized he was their common enemy and ripped him to shreds(figuratively)

Kiril Clockworker nearly got convicted for Pale Noel's stuff, but they couldn't prove anything y'know? He was blamed a little for the catastrophe tho

Catherine Derais once came and she and Rahab were brutal

Brutal for Rahab mostly

All the sinners and the demons sued each other several times

They all got different verdicts each time lol

Sickle is against Luna interfering but doesn't say anything

Eater actually got all heated up in a case against Held once

Arth defended Lich in said case

Lich was so moved

Ney defended herself by saying that Michaela looked like Eve in Michaela's murder trial

No one took it seriously except Hansel and Banica

Nemesis nearly got in trouble for Nyoze's murder but Nyoze(the octo ver) said that her innocence was non-negotiatable

Mira Marlon sued Gallerian for cheating on her and won the case

Nemesis sued Held for not doing shit as a god

Surprisingly Irina, who benefitted the most from his inaction, agreed and he was found guilty

Gumillia was attacked several times for her aiding Elluka Clockworker with crimes and once she claimed that Elluka Clockworker never existed bc she was actually levia behemo, she wasn't elluka chirclatia and ergo elluka clockworker never existed and that Gumillia couldn't have POSSIBLY helped her do crime

The court just took a minute to process this in silence

"I hold nothing BUT contempt for this court." -Germaine, absolutely sick of this bullshit

But that quote could be anyone tbh

This is really long but the ideas just kept coming to me. I find it funny when characters are confronted with their actions, even if it is comedy like this

Honestly Evils Theatre SHOULD have had more trials

it would have been so fun

[ravilson23]

Okay so new ep of helluva boss came out and... it wasnt very good. For me it was actually the worst episode of all of them and here is why.

First thing, pacing. I think with this episode i finally understood what bad pacing is because everything feels rushed. From action and plot, by sound design to animation. And one of the reasons behind this is too many topics squished in only 20 minutes. We had Stolas and his divorce with Stella, Octavia and all her drama, Blitz and Stolases relationship, M&Ms relationship, Blitzos fear of performing and losing Loona, Loonas past and her getting closer to Octavia. Its so many things and such a short time. And because of this none of the subjects is getting focus nor time to build up emotional tension.

So lets take a closer look at each of those plot points.

First i will talk about Blitz and Stolas, because last episodes were all about it. And they could actually not exist right now because here its totally ignored. I dont know if it was somehow resolved in ep8 of season 1, but we didnt see it so i will just ignore it. All the tension between characters is gone, Blitz is turned on by Stolas praising his sexual skills (which u know, he is still treated like there is nothing more to him than sex), Stolas doesnt seem hurt anymore by being unloved, the Asmodeus Crystals didnt appear (which didnt have to be now, but its still little weird, it seemed important) , and everything went to shit. All this drama, pain and suffering didnt get a pay off and i am so dissapointed. Their dynamic got somehow turned into just being attracted and horny, and all the complicated intresting stuff got wiped out. (I really, really hope it wont be all season 2 and its just a hiccup, please let it be). Their moments are just shallow, short, out of character, or too focused on one of their trait. By this i mean for example Stolas laughing at Bllitzos jokes. Yea, it was adorable, but why do it here? Especially with all those puppy eyes (there was soooo many of them, seriously). And others are laughing too, so its not so special anymore. And in the end even he is bored! Another scene is the one inside a van, it was abrubt, meant to show Blitzos willignes to help Stolas, but the topic got changed so quickly and unnaturally u are just too baffled to react. It also meant shit in the end, cause u know, Loona. It was meant to be important moment but got turned into comedic one. There are actually two scenes i like between them though, first is Blitz calling Stolas, and second is Stolas asking Blitz about Moxxies phone number. It was interesting cause we dont really see Stolas sassy. And Blitz somehow saying exactly the thing he didnt want to say feels like sth he would do.

Now i will use this to write about Blitz. His personal traumas and issues werent treated seriously enough. First his panic attack in the office. It was put here but nothing was done with it. (And it could be powerful to see this usually confident character breaking down in public). Then his willingness to help Stolas (in the van), could show deeper emotions and in the end didnt because he was literally useless. Then we have more important stuff, his fear of performing. It lasted less than a minute i think. Its actually quite important and should have been explored. We know he probably hates himself, so fear of getting rejected and riddiculed makes sense. It may also be connected to some particular trauma from his childhood. But it wasnt in any way hinted that it may be the case and it got resolved very quickly, so apparently the issue wasnt this serious. And lastly his memory of adopting Loona. I feel like this would work much better if it wasnt shown in this ep. I think their relationship should get their own ep, or at least half of it. It could have been explored here (la probably would have to be wiped out) , him wanting to fire Loona is actually a good conflict. She could feel like he is abandoning and rejecting her, for someone who was adopted it feels like a powerful blow. Her anger and hurt would probably lead to some sheanigans, which would end with A. Her understanding that Blitz will love her no matter what and accepting he fucks up, B. Blitz understanding Loona more and maybe becoming a better parent, C. SHOWING THIS MEMORY, D. Moxxie and Millie learning to be less racist (cause here Mox is the one who advised Blitz to speak with Loona [not like he wasnt right, but u know, i dont think they are okay towards Loona either]) .

But okay, lets get to Millie and Moxxie. The biggest problem is that they literally didnt do anything to plot. U could erase them and the only thing u would lose is comedy (which was funny at first, but got boring very quickly). I liked seeing Millie getting tired at Moxxies antics becuse it was new. But i am unsure how much is this in character. Honestly, she was created to be perfect lover, strong and murderous but caring and loving to her partner. Its not much of personality so u can do many stuf but i think she should have her character developed in her own ep so we can explore those changes. Moxxie is also kinda different, because normally he is the responsible one. Wouldnt he go insane if he found out how easy Blitz made it to steal the book from them? Though, on a positive note, him being smug about berating Loona is on point. But him getting distracted in the middle of rescue mission of GOETIA PRINCESS? I believe he would panic hard. But well, we had Blitz already doing that, so the role was filled. The one thing i actually liked were his interactions with Blitz, cause they felt more like friends.

Now Octavia. It may seem like its her episode, but it really isnt. The beginning is good, her being happy, Stolas ignoring her, stealing the book. I actually liked that, it felt like a good conflict to resolve. Suprise it wasnt resolved by Stolas, but by Loona who didnt even know Octavia before! Like, i enjoy them being friends (just friends, please dont make it offical canon ship, i would like to see some platonic relationship for once), but it wasnt her conflict to resolve. It should be Stolas, who for example took her to space to see at least one meteor. (I know we had fireworks, didnt feel good enough). Or something else, but really, this plot didnt change their relationship at all. Its worse version of Loo Loo Land. BUT to say something positive, the line "why does he hates her more than he loves me" ( or sth like that) was great. Shame it was just that.

I wont write about Stella, she is in what, 30s of this ep?

So lastly Loona. She is the best part in my opinion, because she is mostly still in character. Her being angry at Blitz, ignoring Octavia sneaking in, not looking for her in LA depsite being said to do so, calling Moxxie fat. Its all things i think she would do. The only think that doesnt fit is ironically the last scene, with her cheering Octavia up. Or rather being some kind of mentor/ older sister/ please not romantic interes kind of person. I dont think she is mature enough to open like this, nor that understanding after Blitz said he may fire her. Like what the hell? Am i missing something? I also didnt like how she was portrayed in Blitzos memory, and i mean the crying part. I think she wouldnt show her pain cause it was dangerous where she lived. Obviously this part is more my preference than actual critique.

I wish i was done but i am not. (Sorry). Now, some other thing that bothered me a lot was sound design. Did u notice how one melody changes into other without some smooth transition? U can hear this first when action starts to take place in I.M.P. Then another very unfitting change is when van scene starts. This are not all, but they got stuck in my head the most. Even the animation is somehow rushed most of the time. And i dont know exactly why, but i guess it lacks balance? Sometimes anatomy of characters gets lost, other times they move a little too much and there are moments when characters seem to float above backround (i mostly mean when they walk).

All those things makes this weak. So summing up, past episode became irrevelant, characters mostly dont act like themselves, emotional moments that were strong became shallow, there was too many scenes with horny Stolitz ( the worst is shirtless Blitz, come on!), plot wasnt constructed well ( unnecesery plot points - Millie and Moxxie, Brandon Rogers and this sitcom drama, plot focused on everything and in the end nothing) as well as pacing, bad audio design, somehow weird animation, and in generall it feels like filler that works very badly for the show. I obviously will still watch helluva, but i really really hope it wont happen to whole second season. Because if so this show will became a wasted potential and leave me very bitter.

Sorry for long post and for all mistakes i did writing it. Thank u if u read all of this, i am seriously impressed.

[criminalizegolf]

Bottom left reminded me of a long suppressed memory which can only be shared in greentext format

> be me, 11 y/o

> 2nd week at new school I transferred into partway through year

> trying to hide a stutter, haven't told any faculty

> have no friends

> 1st period teacher says a cop guy is going to give an anti-drug presentation after lunch

> we're literally in middle school why are you scaring us about cocaine

> whatever nobody gives a shit anyway

> go to lunch

> about to force down my chicken nuggets completely dry since this school doesn't know how to refill the ketchup dispensers

> suddenly teacher grabs me and pulls me out of lunch room

> didn't even get to open my milk carton

> "congratulations, criminalizegolf, you've been randomly chosen to give a short speech to introduce Officer CopGuy!"

> try to explain that I'm the worst possible candidate for this

> they won't hear it

> well the truth was gonna come out eventually

> embarrassed tell them about my stutter

> they still won't let me say no

> try to appeal to Principal DickFace

> "criminalizegolf, public speaking isn't acary just pretend the audience isn't there"

> this whole school is fucking bullshit I'm telling my dad about this when I get home and he's gonna kick your ass, DickFace

> 20 mins later im backstage practicing my little speech

> suddenly grabbed again

> sometime in the past half hour the genius factory in the staff room found a solution to my lifelong speech inpediment

> sure Jan

> can't they see I'm busy trying to memorize the cue cards they gave me

> "you won't stutter if you can't hear yourself talking"

> they shove some earplugs into my head and toss me onto the stage

> they left all the house lights on "so it feels less like a presentation and more like a discussion"

> make eye contact with random a kid in the front row

> instantly terrified

> know that if I look up from my cue cards and see the audience i'll lose my shit

> must not freak out in front of the whole school

> remember what the teacher told me and start to pretend the audience isn't there

> try to turn my brain off and just read whatever my cue cards say

> not even processing the words

> halfway through my speech everything going as well as it could be

> actually not stuttering any more than usual

> I might manage to make it out of this with a few shreds of dignity

> earplugs block out the kids' screams when the auditorium lighting malfunctions

> can't hear that the speakers aren't working either

> build up enough confidence to look up from my cue cards

> damn it's dark as hell in here

> it wasn't dark before

> huh that's weird

> shit I stopped talking and lost my place

> look at my cue cards to find where I left off

> realize I can still see my cue cards

> realize I can still see my hands

> realize the one, singular fucking functioning light in this room is the spotlight on me

> this is worse than whatever I was afraid of

> still can't hear anything

> instant terror pt 2

> spin in circles looking for a way off stage

> can't see anything outside the pillar of light I'm trapped in

> look to where the audience should be

> total-blackness.jpeg

> squint until my eyes adjust enough to see the glowing sign above the fire door

> if you jerkoffs will excuse me I'll be proceeding to have a panic attack at my nearest emergency exit

> walk straight off the stage

> fall like a sack of shit

> roll the shit out of my ankle

> it hurts so fucking bad I start crying like a bitch

> power comes back

> all the lights turn back on

> all the students who were lining up to calmly evacuate the area turn around

> Jesus fucking Christ they're looking at me

> welp I guess I'm freaking out in front of the whole school

> get carried off to nurse's office

> both mom and dad come to pick me up

> cheap ass privacy violation doors mean I overhear them talking to the principal

> "I'm so sorry Mr. and Mrs. Parents, we wanted to help shake criminalizegolf out of his shell a bit. We had no way of knowing this would happen"

> "randomly chosen" my ass I knew this was a fucking conspiracy

> get taken home early

> dad says he won't kick Principal DickFace's ass

> there's always a fucking conspiracy

we need to reclaim this little bitch ass frog. cause I love him. btw. if you even care.