#and I had to rethink the analysis

[deeism]

frank waterboarding dee.... scenes to sink your teeth into and shake around frantically

[nicxxx5]

some of you guys have really extreme takes and need to like...chill the fuck out

[sugar-grigri]

CSM 182 : snow or the power of forgetting

the snow, eaten by CSM recently, forgotten

the snow, the illusion that lulled Aki in his last moments

the snow, chapter 182, where you finally put the pieces together

what does snow mean ?

What if I told you that Denji's reaction to Yoru's ambivalence was the wrong one ?

I'm not talking from a moral point of view, but purely from a narrative one.

What does Yoru actually do by threatening and kissing him ?

It leads to ambivalence, to a striking contrast that is unbearable.

But life is nothing other than this same diluted contrast, this mixture of negative and positive constantly associated.

When Denji says he can't master these two facets, these dirty tricks and all the problems he has to face, that's precisely what has become his worry.

splitting himself, splitting his surroundings, seeing obstacles as ultimatums.

All this may seem off-the-wall and crazy, or like an analysis to justify Yoru's behaviour.

It isn't.

Don't see his kiss as a kiss, but as a narrative perch for Denji to finally face up to himself

Why ?

Dirty things are what he's always hoped for, they seemed in essence extremely positive, they were the way out of his misfortunes

For Denji, doing dirty things inevitably led to happiness.

Denji gradually realises, thanks to several female characters, that these dirty things are not all positive.

You might think that Denji really took his time to realise this...

But it's far from easy for him; for him, life was a deep unhappiness, always, with no prospect of happiness

Or rather, he couldn't see happiness

Because his conception of happiness was restricted to those dirty things

Pochita, Aki, Power, Nayuta, Denji realised his own unhappiness after their disappearance, he only realised the presence of happiness through his loss

Because he hadn't done anything dirty until now!

Until the end of part 1, Denji is trying to rethink his vision of happiness and is trying to break away from normality, to raise his standards higher: eating steak, 10 girlfriends.

Even though he has come close to happiness, Denji doesn't realise it, because since that happiness wasn't eternal, it wasn't happiness.

Happiness remains a way out for him.

Tasting his definition of happiness, being kissed by Yoru, makes him realise that happiness has lost its meaning.

With each kiss, Denji realises that it won't bring him happiness, because it doesn't make him happy.

Little by little, Denji tries to get closer to something for the long term, not the moment.

That's why, he asks if "Asa" loves him.

Can he finally taste that unchanging happiness? Never taste unhappiness again ?

Asa is his downside, her intrusive thoughts, her internal panics, her reflections are preventing her from living in the moment.

And she doesn't want to live in the moment, because she doesn't trust her instincts (when for Denji they are a way out).

Her instincts led her to save a cat, causing the sacrifice of her mother.

But it was Chainsaw Man who made her realise that life can be excruciatingly bitter and sometimes sweet.

Inhabited by Denji, who is as lost.

How could Denji say something as right as that crap burger if he's lost too ? Life is disgusting, it's tiring and yet we keep eating this burger, thinking of dogs, cats and ice cream.

Because Denji didn't do it.

It's Denji perfectly fused with Pochita.

CHAINSAW MAN.

A double being, symbolically realising the ambivalence of life.

Denji was Pochita's happiness, hence her sacrifice.

Pochita was Denji's happiness, hence his unhappiness.

The constant association of happiness with unhappiness - after all, that's all Denji and Pochita's meeting is about.

Except that at that moment, Denji had come to the wrong conclusion, talking about sex, hence the feeling of unease, and a sense of rupture in his speech. The hope of supreme happiness makes us eat this crap burger, it's true. But it won't make us happy.

What Yoru shows, even though he's part of Asa, is that the concept of happiness and unhappiness make no sense to a devil ; they instrumentalizes them, doesn't understand them.

So she gets hit by Asa because, damn it, this concept of happiness and unhappiness belongs to men.

So Asa takes over and says she hasn't recovered from her mother's death because this event will always seem so unacceptable and horrible to her. Bad things don't disappear.

What changes is the memories we want to bring to the fore.

Snow.

Symbolising Denji's supreme misfortune of having killed his brother to the point of vomiting with guilt.

Symbolically, it is this same vomiting that spits out the snow.

The snow is not just a trauma.

Aki was obsessed by the memory of the tragedy of his family, who were also killed in snowy weather.

And when Aki decides to visit his family's graves, to pay his respects tragically at his family's graves

He can't do it

Because two idiots divert his attention.

Forcing Aki to look away from the unhappiness of the past

To face the happiness right in front of him.

What Aki realised just before his death was that he had never seen happiness, or rather he had chosen not to.

Because happiness isn't there to be found, it's there, it's just there to be looked at, plunged in a pile of shit but it's sometimes there, but we refuse to consider that this thing is happiness, we can hope for more, can't we?

You have to eat this crappy hamburger, even if it means throwing up.

This is the taste of happiness.

Back to the snow

Which you associate with Denji's sadness and Aki's death

Yet this snow fight is Aki's last happiness

Seeing that snow again, associated with that fateful day when he lost his family

Holding that snow in his hands, and playing with his little brother, a little brother he has found again

What if this scene wasn't something he had to endure, but a choice? Aki's choice not to see, the gun held to his eyes, the choice to lull himself into one last sweet illusion, one last bandage, one last cigarette, to escape from this reality that he had always stubbornly tried to face, to escape from it.

But Denji is crying at this point.

Happiness cannot be total happiness, it melts, like snow.

Unhappiness will always be diametrically opposed.

The fact remains that snow is this temporary oblivion, this misfortune that we take in our hands to make snowballs, this moment of fun condemned to melt, snow determines what we do with our misfortune and our happiness.

Snow represents what we decide to see.

It is the forgetting, or rather the silencing of painful memories.

To realize that the snow is cold is to realize the end of happiness, because you're not playing anymore.

I don't like playing snowball: I don't like pretending to be happy anyway.

These memories will not disappear, but we can choose not to see them too much

The snow will remain cold, it will be condemned to melt, it is this moment, what we do with this moment.

Because if it didn't melt, no life would develop

If happiness and unhappiness were not this constant ambivalence, this intermingling of happy and painful moments, if this ephemeral aspect did not exist

Then no life would exist.

When Denji vomits snow, it's because he realises once again the association between happiness and unhappiness that snow represents.

Disgusted by this sad reality too, of not seeing unchanging happiness, of seeing life not as a burger, but as a shit burger.

But the snow is beautiful and it won't stay.

Like these two.

[aromacaque]

Quick S5 Analysis and Theory

I AM GOING TO RAMBLE ANALYSIS BECAUSE THEY ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY

I cannot stop thinking about the way Wukong reacts to Macaque when he goes "oh no 'gee thanks for saving me macaque!...'" cause if this were before the S5E2, he would have snapped back at him, like he always does.

We know Macaque does this solely to rile Wukong up. It's how we're introduced to his character in S1E9 and he does it throughout the series. This is why he did it here too (or at least partially), BUT WUKONG DOESN'T TAKE THE BAIT THIS TIME.

While he's obviously still reeling from seeing the memory of their fight he was forced to watch,

you can still see that, for a split second, Wukong almost does snap back, but he instantly rethinks that and decides to be passive

Macaque, again, pokes at him trying to get a reaction, but this time Wukong doesn't even think about snapping back. He simply responds casually/lightly (before then realizing that MK is in danger)

This tells us possibly two really important things

Macaque sacrificing himself in S5E2 was a turning point for Wukong's perception of him. An increase in personal trust/faith/etc.

2. Seeing the memory of their fight made him rethink his behavior toward Macaque

For the rest of the season, they don't get a lot of moments because of, well, Everything, but we see Wukong is not only more willing to show concern for his wellbeing, but also seems to be more open/emotionally vulnerable in front of him than before (in little moments, anyway).

Granted that has been building up since S4E11, arguably before that but I'm not going to deep dive analyze season 3. He's being more communicative with Macaque in S5E1 about MK too. In other words, not completely shutting him out or pushing him away, which seems like their natural progression from S4E11 as well.

All of that being said, this brings me to The Scene. Which I am completely normal about because there's so much to unpack about it and I am so normal about that. Evidently.

First of all, they wanted to hold hands during their final moments. MK and Macaque are the two most important people in Wukong's life, I feel like that speaks for itself.

BUT it's Wukong who reaches out here.

This is Wukong's first major attempt to bridge the gap between them, at least in such a direct way. In my opinion, it's almost a wordless forgiveness on top of acknowledging how Macaque has changed and improved himself, as well as his reciprocation of that behavior. He wants to fix their relationship too, just as he has seen Macaque willing to do the same.

This moment being interrupted was actually a good thing. It's a good visual reminder that, despite them both wanting to reconcile, they aren't Quite there yet. There's still a lot left unsaid between these two, most importantly Macaque's death. (I'LL GET TO THAT. HOLD THAT IN YOUR BRAIN)

For macaque, this moment has another important meaning.

AND NOW I GET TO TALK ABOUT ONE OF MY FAVORITE WRITING TOOLS HELLO PARALLELS!!!!

In S2E7 we are introduced to this shot of Wukong on a pedestal over Macaque, turning his back on him and abandoning him. This is firmly established in that episode as one of the main reasons Macaque resents Wukong.

He is also portrayed as above him, subsequently nodding at Macaque feeling inferior to him.

In S4E11, we actually watch how this dynamic destroys their friendship. It is a MAJOR reason for their falling out. Macaque feels neglected, overlooked, ignored. Promises are broken and trust is lost. To him, Wukong is selfish, self-righteous, egotistical, uncaring, etc.

Obviously we as the audience are aware Macaque has a rather skewed perception of Wukong that seems to be influenced by his projection of his own insecurities, but that is a whole other analysis for a different time.

In S5E10, this shot is paralleled. Visually demonstrating that Wukong isn't forgetting about him this time. He looks for him. Macaque is being considered in a way he had previously believed was lacking in their friendship.

Not only that, but they are on level ground. Balanced and equal.

Macaque is reluctant to reach back out. His trust in Wukong is practically non-existent, has been for a while (understandably), so it's a little hard for him, but he reciprocates because, like Wukong, he's acknowledging that he has changed. He wants to try to fix this too.

TO RECAP!

They know they both want to fix things

They can see and have acknowledged changes in their behavior on both sides

Wukong seems to be less prone to arguing back, which will most likely make Macaque less likely to try and provoke him. All in all, they will be more civil with each other and most likely argue much less.

They are being held back by things left unsaid.

WHICH LEADS ME TOO...

WHERE DOES THIS LEAD THEM IN S6?

The obvious is they need to address Macaque's death. If they don't do it in this season it's bad writing and they are dragging it out for too long. It's the obvious natural progression here.

This is where they will have an actual, long overdue constructive conversation. It is literally singlehandedly the only thing preventing them from reconciling at this point.

Now, the problem, is how this would happen. Because we all know neither of them are going to randomly apologize out of nowhere. It's gonna take something to push them into that direction. And that should be how it happens otherwise it'd most likely feel forced in the script.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO A THEORY. A GAME THEO-

I'm not going to get into the nitty-gritty details of this particular theory, but just know that I am a firm believer in the "Macaque was consumed by his own powers and that's what killed him" theory. I do think Wukong played a substantial role in his death, enough for Macaque to reasonably believe Wukong killed him, but ultimately it was less Wukong directly killing him and more indirectly causing it and not saving him.

That being said, Wukong and Macaque's relationship is a major subplot in this show with a considerable amount of focus. They have been slowly building to their inevitable mending relationship since Macaque's first episode, which means that they're going to want to reach that climax in a pivotal emotional moment. Not a random conversation smacked into an episode.

And what is going to be plot-relevant next season??

MACAQUE'S CHAOS POWERS.

S5 built up to Macaque being an established member of the group

(Also the VO here being "change can be terrifying" is absolutely foreshadowing to some degree)

Now, there's also something else I need to address. Macaque has gone out of his way 3 separate times, 4 if you count the LBD fight, to save Wukong. On the other hand, Wukong obviously cares about Macaque, but ultimately hasn't had many opportunities or reasons to try to save him specifically.

With all of those details in mind, I think Wukong will need to take direct action by either saving him/protecting him/etc. because I think it would be a high-stakes moment that inevitably kickstarts an apology/conversation between them. Maybe it's something that reminds Wukong of their fight or that macaque can die (hence the chaos powers potentially harming Macaque in some manner or maybe a potential difficulty controlling them reminds Wukong of their fight, something along these lines).

Why this route?

Macaque has regained Wukong's trust. He basically says as much in S5E2. And while it's fairly obvious with Macaque's behavior and choices that he has learned from his past mistakes and is working on his faults, he definitely needs to acknowledge his wrongdoings. However, I think that would naturally happen during any conversation they may have (or the aftermath) regarding his death and their feelings.

That leaves Wukong because he made a promise to Macaque that they’d spend eternity together and that he would protect him and their home. A promise he broke multiple times and has not made up for yet. He needs to mend that and make it right to solidly regain Macaque's trust in order to reconcile.

[dejabooooo]

Alex hirsch interviews always leave me blown away. I could listen to this man talk for hours, he is so inspiring. Definitely the kind of writer I strive to be like.

One of the main things i took away from this interview is how strongly his every word reiterates that his number one priority is the emotions and arcs of the characters. Here’s a couple tangents about that cuz I gotta get them outta my brain:

It became really clear to me on the Fiddleford question about the memory gun and the timeline. He couldn’t even remember how the events lined up but what he DID remember once reminded was the incredibly complex feelings McGucket was having and the specifics of how his friendship with ford was affecting him at that point in time.

It was fascinating to hear because this information was so much more complicated than the initial timeline rearrangement question. Almost all of his answers were like this. So, so deep and thoughtful and it really highlighted the fact that he is a storyteller whose focus is on the important things.

Canon dates and hidden codes and funny jokes are secondary to heart because heart is the big picture. Ppl say it’s the codes and secrets are the “deeper” part of gf. But the complexities of the characters in and of themselves are INSANELY deep. It becomes especially clear when Alex himself is talking about them. He knows their minds and motivations so well, and it tends to get overshadowed by lore questions but to me the details of the inner working of the characters minds and the psychology of their actions is the MOST interesting information that comes out of these interviews.

I feel like ppl might not agree with me when I say this. But for me the answer about ford looking at romance the same way Tesla does is a way more fascinating idea than concluding definitively that he’s gay (and this is coming from someone who’s written an entire fic about the latter). Because that’s so unique! That’s so different! I’ve never seen that before! It gives him such a distinct and fresh identity and it makes so much sense for him

I myself wasn’t particularly a fan of don’t dimension it before I watched this. Because I had thought that it was humoring the fandoms bad faith gripes about Mabel’s character, but luckily I was wrong! Online media analysis has unfortunately forced a moral priority on most story explorations and I’ll admit I bought into it a bit with this. I thought Mabel was being punished for her personality. But Alex’s incites quelled this worry. The narrative wasn’t blaming Mabel for weirdmageddon, Mabel was blaming Mabel for weirdmageddon. As he explained, she was just experiencing a bit of self awareness for the first time just like dipper did in double dipper.

This interview has made me rethink things a bit. I feel like the very first question a gf fan should ask themselves before building a theory is ‘does this idea compromise the arcs or narrative purpose of the characters?’ If the answer is an immediate yes then it’s not canon full stop, because then it becomes the antithesis of what gravity falls is really about

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

I don't know if you can do it but if you can (want to), can you do child Atsushi and child Akutagawa in teyvat with teen reader.

Or they could be with normal Ages too!

If you were not alone

Part IX

Characters: Self-Aware! (Child!) Atsushi Nakajima, Self-Aware! (Child!) Akutagawa Ryunosuke

Reader: Teen! GN! Reader

Warning: OOC. English is my second language. Physical age regression (Atsushi and Akutagawa remain their memories, mental age and abilities, but physically were turned into children). Platonic hug.

________

🐯🧥 After you, Atsushi and Akutagawa woke up in Teyvat, you tried to find both good and bad in your situation. Bad № 1 - you were transported into Teyvat, without your phone and without any idea of how to go back. Good № 1 - Akutagawa and Atsushi were with you. Bad № 2 - They, somehow, become children. If the situation was better, you would tease them for being an older sibling now. Good № 2 - Their memories were intact. Bad № 3 - You were on Dragonspine in your normal clothes, that wasn't suitable for this mountain. Good № 3 - You ended up in Durin's cave, so, for now, you were warm.

After the analysis you came a to a conclusion - situation was a bad one, not a good one or neutral one. How are you supposed to get down from Dragonspine? The closest people to the cave were Fatui solders, and you don't want to go near them. And you weren't sure, if Albedo visited this place at all. Atsushi and Akutagawa offered to use their abilities to get down from the mountain. However, there were two problems. First - it was almost nighttime, and you don't want to wander around Dragonspine at night. Second - none of you were sure, that Beast beneath the moonlight and Rashomon still have the same power level.

You three decided to sleep in a cave and rethink the situation in the morning.

You fall asleep, listening to a Durin's heart beating.

🐯🧥 The dream you have was strange. Like... You could see everything, that was happening around the Dragonspine. Hilichurls, boars, Fatui, members of Adventure guild... You even saw Albedo in his lab. Yet, you couldn't move. You saw, feel all of them at the same time... Strange dream indeed.

'Durin could not move, but he has remains of his will. It was hard, but he left the message in Scarlet Quartz's pieces near the lab. He knew, who was sleeping near his heart. Creator...'

🐯🧥 You woke up because of Atsushi's and Akutagawa's angry shouts, the smell of burning firewood, toasts, fried onions and tomatoes. The moment you opened your eyes, you saw Albedo, together with Klee, were trying to calm Akutagawa and Atsushi, while trying to keep an eye on the fire. Albedo calmly tried to reason with your older(?) brothers.

"Please, we don't mean any harm. We just want to help."

Well, it seems, you got some luck on your plate.

🐯🧥 You jinxed it. Yes, you had breakfast, and Albedo brought warm clothes. But, the biggest threat was soaring above you three. Because, if Albedo wasn't lying, soon you will have a bounty on your head and an angry mob chasing after you. On your meek "But... what if I told the person on the throne, that I don't want to be in charge and only want to return home" Albedo responded with "The Cursed Brat won't listen. They won't change their mind."

You three were in danger. And you need to move fast. Chase after Alice. To get home.

Albedo couldn't help Atsushi and Akutagawa became adults again. But, he said, that they would either get to their original age soon enough, or Alice could help with that.

And, according to Albedo, she was on her way to Fontaine.

Albedo gave you supplies and helped you find a boat.

Your journey has begun.

🐯🧥 Almost near Fontaine borders, you three were captured by Fatui. You were brought to the House of Hearth. You three were separated. Atsushi and Akutagawa were with other kids. And you were kept in the basement. In a hidden dungeon.

🐯🧥Atsushi hated the House of Hearth. While it wasn't as bad as his previous orphanage, this place still felt rotten. Especially because of the other residents.

"Poor brothers, the Sinner had corrupted you. Don't worry anymore. Father will protect you." Lynette, as Atsushi learned her name later, couldn't finish the line. Akutagawa still can't use Rashomon, but, the knowledge about self-defense was still with him. And Atsushi knew, how to throw a punch without white tiger's help.

Two ten-year-old boys were throwing punch after punch, hitting Lynette.

"Don't you dare talk about [Y/N] like that! They are our sibling!" yelled Atsushi. Akutagawa growled, trying to bite Lynette's ear.

Both of them were restrained and locked in a storage room.

They could hear, how Lyney and Freminet, who locked them, were whispering about "poor kids. I hope, it's not too late."

When the voices disappeared, New Double Black tried to make up a plan.

Akutagawa whispered.

"Did you learn, where [Y/N] are, Man-tiger?"

Atsushi shook his head.

"No. You?"

Akutagawa shook his head in return.

"No. This damn place is too big."

And, Atsushi could bet on it, other kids were keeping an eye on him and Akutagawa. They can't search the orphanage freely. But they knew, that you were still here. Something tells them, that your... "Punishment for being an Imposter" won't be quiet and hidden.

🐯 They were talking the rest of the day. And no good effective ideas were proposed. Atsushi hated it. He hated to be small and powerless. He hated, that you were in danger. If only his ability was here...

Atsushi's eyes slowly focused on the small window. At the full moon.

The transformation was painful. But, the white tiger has returned.

🧥 Akutagawa didn't pay attention to Atsushi or moon. He was thinking about you. You were his little sibling. And he was your protector. And he can't fail his job. He just needs… Just need his power. Akutagawa almost shouted.

"Rashoumon: Tenma Tengai"

And black tendrils finally came to life.

And the black hellhound has returned.

🐯🧥 Huge feline were shuffling the air, like it was trying to find something... Or someone. Yes... His family were missing. Tiger cub were missing. Tiger saw, that dragon knight was here. He will help find tiger cub.

Akutagawa, in his Rashomon's armor, climbed on tiger's back. Rashoumon's tendrils ripped off the door.

Their search has begun.

🐯🧥 You were half glaring at Arlecchino. The Forth Harbinger has been visiting your cell every day. Trying to convince you to be reasonable. She won't let you and Shin Soukoku go. She saw a chance of having her own loyal Creator. And she won't lose her chance.

Her voice was calm.

"Be reasonable. I can protect you and two kids you were traveling with. All I need from you is to be an obedient godling, child."

You breathe in, but stayed quiet. You already begged Arlecchino to let you three go. She didn't. Maybe, if you tried again...

🐯 He could smell it. Faint scent of his tiger cub. He snarled, following it. His tiger cub was in danger. Dragon knight on his back destroyed doors, that were on their way.

They reached the basement. And white tiger finally found his tiger cub.

🐯🧥 The door behind Arlecchino fell apart. Before Harbinger could react, familiar black maw sank its fangs in her shoulder and threw her away. The door of your cage have no chance against white tiger and Rashomon.

Immediately, you were hugged by Akutagawa, and the huge feline rubbed his head against your torso, chuffing happily.

Happy tars flow down your eyes.

"Guys! You are here!"

Akutagawa, before answering, put you on tiger's back, sitting behind you.

"We would never abandon you."

White tiger waited, before you two sat on his back, and started to ran off.

You three left the House of Hearth behind.

🐯🧥 Tiger were running all night, until sunset. Then Atsushi transformed back. Then the tears and hugs came again. You three were finally safe, Atsushi and Akutagawa were adults again. Now you can focus on finding Alice.

🐯🧥 It took two more weeks, but you managed to do it. You found Alice. And you finally went home.

____________

🐾 Reunion was tearful. Your fathers, mothers, uncles, aunts and siblings were happy to see you. They were happy to see Atsushi and Akutagawa.

🐾 Your stay in Teyvat were scary. But, one thing you knew for sure. Doesn't matter, what age they were, your brothers Atsushi and Akutagawa will protect you.

_______

Tag list: @withered-blossoms , @myluckymoon @cocodrilofeliz @c4xcocoa @vvyeislazzy @whisperingwinters @nervousinfluencertidalwave @ayameshu

[evellynssocbrainrot]

This is mostly to speak in defense of this post made by @starsandscars81

First of all, my intention isn’t to gatekeep anyone else’s take or opinion on this subject matter. If you think differently that’s completely fine. It’s none of my business. 

Anyway, on to the analysis.

Kaz and the Darkling are, without a doubt, two of the most flawed characters in the Grishaverse. They’ve both done bad things and certainly aren’t good people. Even so, I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: comparing Kaz to the Darkling is still… extreme. And just not it. By comparison, no matter how much awful stuff Kaz has done, it’s no joke that he is over a million times better than the Darkling. 

The Darkling definitely didn’t start off as an evil character, and all his intentions aren’t horrible either. His main motivation is to help the Grisha, his people who have faced years worth of discrimination. He worked hard and built the second army and the Little Palace, which became a kind of haven for Grisha to come together and exercise their gifts. And coming from someone who dislikes the Darkling, I can tell you now that that is wonderful. I’m glad that he’s doing his best and defending his people. That is great. But even then, you can’t deny that some of the things that the Darkling has done on that path are borderline disgusting. The first being massacring hundreds, if not thousands of innocent people. Even if he’s doing it for the sake of his people, killing so many people who are not at fault is not an act of a selfless hero, but pure villainy and cruelty. And what’s worse is that he did this several times. Not just once, and without second thought. Reminders that these innocent people included harmless children.

The rest of the horrible deeds he’s done all come down to his treatment of Alina Starkov (and a bit of Genya Safin, as well). Whether you like Darklina or not, never forget or sugarcoat the idea that he ABUSED her. He may have loved her, he may have understood her, but he hurt her. Over and over again. He lied to her and hid his true intentions. He placed a collar on her and touched her without consent. He stole her power and claimed her as if she was nothing but an object. He was possessive of her and emotionally tormented her even after she ran away. He killed the only mother figure she had and completely destroyed her childhood home. He was absolutely disgusting. There is nothing at all to forgive and redeem. He was already beyond redemption when he created the Fold. And once again, IT DOESN’T MATTER if he loved her. It doesn’t matter at all when he did nothing but hurt her to such extreme amounts and would have continued to if he ever won, or if Darklina actually became canon. 

And what makes the Darkling even worse is that he doesn’t regret any of it. This is where he truly can be labeled as a heartless and cruel monster. He doesn’t express so much as even a sliver of remorse over his inhuman behavior. He doesn’t feel bad. He doesn’t reflect on it or think about it. In fact, he still believes himself to be in the right. He doesn’t even realize how awful he is. Doesn’t show any sign of improving himself. I mourn the person he could have been. I mourn Aleksander Morozova. But I will never defend the person he is today. I will always believe that the death he was given was far too light and SHOULD have been worse. It’s what he deserves. 

He didn’t start evil, but he became evil. He had hundreds of years to rethink his actions but never did. He wanted to defend his people, but you don’t do that by expanding the Fold and causing further destruction. You don’t do that with pointless mass murder. He loved Alina, but you don’t express that by ruining her life. Once upon a time, he was a young hurt boy, but now he’s nothing but a revolting, monstrous and horrible psychopath.

With that said, now I’ll move on to Kaz.

He is not a good person. I’ll tell you that now. I’m not at all defending the bad things that he’s done. Neither am I ignoring his bad qualities. He is manipulative, cruel, and violent. When he freed Inej from the Menagerie, his intentions weren’t to save her, but to temporarily make use of her skills. I know this, and I’m not dismissing it.

But here are some things that set him apart from the Darkling.

The first being that almost everything Kaz does has reason. There is ALWAYS a reason. His rage is targeted at hyper-specific people. People who deserve it. He killed Oomen, but because he hurt Inej to the point that she nearly died. He dropped a man from a tower, but because that man blackmailed a Zemeni sex worker. He destroyed Van Eck and his empire, but because Van Eck was a bitch. He spent all his life trying to crush Pekka Rollins, and he did, but because Pekka ruined his life. “Kaz Brekker always had his reasons.” The Darkling had no reason to commit mass murder and hurt Alina. 

The second thing is boundaries. The Darkling didn’t have fucking boundaries. Kaz, on the other hand, no matter the amount of violence and destruction he commits, never crosses some lines. He never ever raped or sexually assaulted anyone, he never hurts innocent people, he never hurts children, and never actually spread firepox around the city of Ketterdam. 

The third being awareness. This is a big one. The Darkling, in his path of vengeance, hardly considers his environment, the people around him, who he should get mad at and who he shouldn’t. And even after the horrible deed is done, as I said before, there’s no remorse and regret. For Kaz it’s the opposite. He is hyper aware of where he is. Who he’s with. He’s careful and considerate. And for some of the horrible things he’s done, despite how understandable and trauma-inflicted they are, he regrets them. He feels bad. He knows he’s not a good person. He knows he is awful. He knows he isn’t worthy of Inej. When he was drowning in the waters of Fjerda, it wasn’t himself he was thinking of. It was his crew, Inej. He was worried for them. He blamed himself for the positions they were in and vowed that no matter what, he would save them. He would fix this mess. The same applies in the next book, when they were all trapped in the Geldrenner hotel. It’s himself Kaz blamed, nobody else. 

We don’t even need to tell Kaz that he’s awful. Because he already knows it and wholeheartedly believes it. And unlike so many other similar male characters in YA fiction, Kaz desperately wished that he could change. Perhaps he doesn’t say this openly, but you know deep down that he doesn’t want to be this way. He doesn’t want this life or the trauma. 

Speaking of the trauma, so much of what Kaz does is because of it. Does it excuse his behavior? Certainly not. But it does help with understanding why. And even now, the consequences he suffers from the trauma are bad, but still don’t excuse what he does. Kaz himself thinks so. 

Kaz was a boy who was hurt, like the Darkling was. He lost someone important, like the Darkling did. But the way he responded to that was immensely different. Even the desire for money is understandable when you realize that the lack of it was what made him and his brother end up on the streets. And the money he got, he literally spent a large portion of it to buy Inej a ship and remake the Emerald Palace into the Silver Six. And before that, he gave up the last of it he had left to pay off Inej’s contract.

AND, speaking of Inej. Only someone extremely stupid would say that the way he treats her is the same as the way the Darkling treats Alina. The dynamic is messy and flawed, but they are young. It’s understandable if they fail from time to time. But overall, Kaz respects Inej. He adores Inej. He’s devoted to Inej. He’s loyal to Inej. He wouldn’t betray or abandon her for all the gold in the world. He’s protective of her, but not possessive. When he sees other people get close to her, he’s jealous. But not because he wants to keep Inej to himself, but because he wants to be able to get close to her like that as well. He realizes the wrong ways he treats her, and then proceeds to claim that he isn’t so bad that he can’t pull himself together for her. He spends a good portion of Crooked Kingdom going out of his way to make up for his behavior and it shows. It doesn’t make him any better a person, but it does make him a far better lover. A worthy book boyfriend <333.

Outside of Inej, you can see how much he cares about his crew. He protects them, he the Parem from Nina, he refuses to give it to Jesper, he gives Wylan advice like a big brother, he gave them all time to rest and recharge in the Geldrenner hotel while dragging his aching body all the way to the Slat to gather more people for his plan. He gave his crew every single resource he had left and even then, contributed alongside them when putting his plan to action. The Slat and the Dregs themselves have become a safe space for young people who don’t have a family or a place to go. He may be selfish with the world, but with them he’s nothing but the most selfless person to ever exist. 

The list is endless, honestly, but this is why it doesn't make any sense to compare Kaz to the Darkling. If I were in a life and death situation, and I was forced to put my trust in one person, Kaz or the Darkling, I would choose Kaz in a heartbeat.

Damn, this took way too long.

[gabrielleyueerrrrr]

What led to Showdown—a character analysis

Summary:

Chosen was the one who initiated the rampages after he and Dark escaped the PC.

Dark created the Virabot in an attempt to please Chosen.

I firmly believe that the names of the hollowheads shaped their personality to some extent. The name "The Chosen One" not only bestowed god- like powers upon the black hollowhead but also a instilled a sense of responsibility, strong self-esteem, and a drive to fight for what is right.

Upon his creation, he immediately rebelled against Alan, seeing the animator as "evil" for creating and torturing stick figures just for fun. Five years of enslavement didn’t wear down his spirit, the moment the slightest opportunity arose, he broke free from his shackles and unleashed his fury upon the PC.

But even when victory was within his grasp, with his tormentor's pawn, The Dark Lord, trembling powerlessly before him, he still chose mercy.

I believe his sense of responsibility and justice wouldn’t allow him to harm someone who was already defenseless, even if that person was his enemy.

I couldn't imagine someone with such a strong moral compass initiating or even agreeing to participate in rampages on the internet purely for the sake of destruction and vengeance. A more reasonable explanation is that Chosen initiated these attacks due to a warped sense of justice. The mistreatment by his creator, the only human he ever knew, might have led him to believe that all humans are tyrants who abuse and exploit stick figures. As "The Chosen One," he felt a responsibility to fight on behalf of his own kind, believing it was his duty to deliver well-deserved punishment upon humans.

But as for Dark, he had no interest in justice whatsoever, he went along with Chosen purely for the thrill of it. Contrary to "The Chosen One", the name "The Dark Lord" weakened his sense of morality and empathy(a sociopath, in a sense). This doesn’t mean he was incapable of learning to be good or sympathetic, though. Chosen simply didn’t realize Dark's moral deficiency until it was too late.

(Or perhaps Chosen was in denial? Dark was his best friend after all)

As time passed, Chosen became more aware of the complexity of mankind. He realized that not all humans were evil, some even formed positive connections with stick figures, like building websites where they could live and work. By attacking the internet and destroying these sites, he was inadvertently harming those he wanted to protect. This made him hesitant and forced him to rethink his actions.

But Dark, he didn't care. Humans, stick figures, animations, it's all the same to him. He enjoyed causing harm and destruction, because it was fun, because he couldn't see that it was wrong.

Imagine Dark laughing joyously as he hurled fireballs at the screaming, retreating crowd of stick figures and animations,

but when he turn around he saw Chosen's shocked, horrified expression, it was as if Chosen was looking at a monster, not his best friend.

Chosen could no longer ignore the fact that Dark was betraying the very ideals he had lived by in his whole life. It became painfully clear that the noble qualities embedded in his code which he so deeply valued were absent in his best friend.

They argued, definitely, fought, maybe. Their once impregnable friendship was cracking, threatening to collapse.

And it scared Dark. Dark didn't understand why Chosen was so angry at him, but he cared about their friendship, he cared about Chosen.

And he wanted to salvage their friendship, he wanted to make Chosen happy again.

So he came up with a plan. He would create a virus so powerful the world has never seen—a virus that would paralyse the internet once and for all. After all, mankind was evil, wasn't that what Chosen always told him? Dark would give humans what they deserve, just as Chosen had always wanted. And then, surely, they could be friends again.

That’s why he eagerly presented his virabots to Chosen, like a child showing off a prized drawing to their parents.

He was certain that Chosen would be impressed, that Chosen would share in the excitement for this grand scheme of destruction.

But instead, the black hollowhead was terrified. Having already lost his trust on Dark, he immediately jumped to the worst conclusion, that Dark was going to terrorise the world including the stick figure civilisation with his virus.

(But Dark's plan never involved harming stick figures. He knew Chosen was adamantly against the idea, so why would he risk their friendship by going against Chosen?)

Dark was understandably hurt and furious at Chosen's betrayal.

It was Chosen who had fuelled his love for destruction, who inspired him to create the virus in the first place. And now, Chosen had the audacity to demand him to stop? Even going so far as to attack him to protect the very humans Chosen had once hated so much?

Was their friendship truly worth less than the properties of evil humans?

As for Chosen, the destructive power of Dark's virabot was the final proof that Dark was an irredeemable villain down to his code. Consumed by a sense of justice, Chosen attacked without mercy.

And Dark, wounded and enraged, retaliated with everything he had.

[shady-swan-jones]

Rings of Power Podcast Recs

If you're looking for podcasts that dive deep into Middle-earth and all its messy bitches, here are a few that go beyond simple recaps. These podcasts really dig into the themes of the show and explore what makes the world and its inhabitants so damn compelling.

Rings Reforged (@ringsreforged)

Nat and Pau combine sharp analysis of themes with delightful unhingedness. They dive into topics like redemption, why we’re drawn to dark ships (and whether we should be), who’s on the chopping block, and the little details that drive us bananas — all with a level of media literacy that decodes every scene.

House of R

Jo and Mal do their best Fëanor and dive deep into the latest episodes, beginning with their opening snapshot, before a deep dive into each scene and a special spoiler speculation section. Together they have an impressive amount of Tolkien lore knowledge, as well as literature takes. Bonus episodes for music, promos and interviews with the cast!

Girls Nerd Out (@southernmotherofdragons )

No two people complete each other's thoughts like these two. Amanda and Andrea remind me of me and my best friend, if I could shake some sense into her and convince her to watch RoP. They ask the right questions and together they figure it out. Bonus, costumes!

Where The Shadows Lie (@wtslpod )

Kat and Wren always find I haven't noticed in a scene that gives me pause and makes me rethink the plot. Their nuanced take on Earien, for example had me rethinking the whole Numenor arc. Excellent.

Cast of the Rings

Very deep (3h) dives. Take an oxygen mask.

Ancient History Fangirl ep. Hot Sauron Summer

Mythology obsessed friends watch RoP and chaos ensues.

These are the ones I listen to and favour, if you know more and they're positive, add them. In a sea of unearned hate, let's celebrate what's made by fans for fans.

[impyssadobsessions]

Prompt/Relationship Analysis/Headcanon DPxDC

Okay This can be taken as a prompt~ As I love to dive into possibilities of WHAT IF- Basically after becoming friends/adopted by the bats and entering the hero circle he starts to become insecure in his place as a hero. Not feeling good enough.

So I can imagine after Danny befriends/gets in touch with the batfamily in some way. Like they've pretty much adopted him and now he's surrounded by heroes- (Both from Gotham and outside of it) That he starts to get insecure about his heroics as phantom. He starts to get to know other vigilantes, some with similar struggles and then it just dawns on him that they're better at it then him.. in every way. There is always someone who has one of his powers and does it better. Who can do the only thing he has been dedicating himself to- way better. And it hurts. Danny who grew up with a "perfect" older sister and being known as the failure of the two-I can see his insecurity eat at him. The feeling of not being good enough. Which is bad if mixing his trauma and guilt of a future that never happened or fear of losing everyone. ESPECIALLY because he's close to the bats.. The batfamily are perfectionist- because they have to be but Danny can't see that. Even rougher if the bats don't even realize they're doing it. Yeah they're better at sneaking, duh. They're highly skilled, because they've trained on it to be that way. Even if they don't hold the standard on Danny's head- it kills him to know he with all his powers is struggling to be as good as them. Can see only ones really about to notice are like Duke and Steph, or like Kon and other YJ members. Those that know how it feels to be next to them. Kon or Steph having to basically spell it out for Tim- which Tim like what? Then realizes and feels dumb because its so obvious. (plus having felt that way before just feels like a double whammy) (Can see all the bat members having felt that pressure too so its like an OOF how did I not notice moment) Or Step and Duke spelling it out for the rest of the family.. like DUH =w= Babs probably figures it out too. Imagine a cute heart to heart with Duke and Steph, and Alfred. Those picking up on the reason WHY Danny's acting strange. Danny pushing himself harder- feeling guilty about making it a competition but also not wanting to fail- ends up breaking down a little. Because he feels not enough. Even if he had reconciled with his parents and everything- still lingers that he was failing school.. struggling as a hero, struggling with relationships. Now he with other heroes and the doubts are so heavy. But he has no choice to pull through. So he does as he always does and keeps going even if he's crashing. Danny just not realizing his worth, despite everyone seeing it. Idk just seem like a perfect bonding moment for after Danny enters the dc world, for the bats to be like OH fucking right. Because they just accepted him as their own- Like setup for each bat to have their own one on one with DAnny. Each relating in different ways. Learning each has their own motivation and they all worry about not being enough- but how they cope. Danny rethinking reasons why he saves ppl- and in the end its just because he CANT let things happen when he has the power to stop it.. And even if he's not enough- he's there. And that can make such a difference. ......IDK if any of this made sense btw- couldn't focus properly at work because many scenarios of this was popping in my head. Still can't focus enough to keep a consistent thought- BUT I wanted to get this out <3 Because the scenarios in my head are so cute.

[yannaryartside]

THE LIE THAT CLAIRE BELIVES

THE CARETAKER WOUND

So, I keep coming back and forth with my opinions on Claire. Yeah, she did many things that will be a no-go for me as a person, sometimes cringe or childless, and could be taken as manipulative as well. I have been rethinking about it after reading this amazing post:

But there was something constantly ominous about how she was presented, not only as a manic pixie dream girl coded woman but also as a helper, described as an "incredibly good person" who sometimes managed to become an enabler. I will use some books about childhood wounds I have been re-reading, trying to do for her what I did for Carmen in this post. A deep character analysis speculating on the character's childhood wounds based on behaviors they display.

Let's go brick by brick. Long post underneath.

PART 1: THE HELPER OF DRUNK, SAD PEOPLE

Quoting from @brokenwinebox post: In the party.

Claire: “In college, people would come back to my house after parties. and I think I got really good at managing sad drunk people.” Carmy: “Yeah, I know that feeling.” Claire: “I know you do.”

That made me pause, because she made it seem like a common occurrence. She doesn't say these people were their friends, and maybe they were. But it becomes weirder when you think they were at that party (with Carmy) with the excuse of helping her broken-hearted friend. Claire said, "She needs me"

Girl, what? I get wanting to be there with your friend, but you are talking to your (you said later) childhood crush, dont you wanna spent time alone with him? The other girl doesn't seem like your best friend or anything, so doesn't she have other friends she could rely on during this hard time? She was throwing a party, so she was surrounded by people who could have cheered her up. Why was your presence so needed in particular?

Even if you say they were really close, when Claire said that other people would come to her house drunk after parties, my question is

Why? why was your house the place to do that? Did they insist? Some people can be dangerous while drunk, even if she described them as "sad."

Why did you feel these people were your responsibility? To be a good friend? Didn't you have to study? I had a heavy reading career in college, and I will read while eating or even in the gym, but it didn't come close to being a medical student. I assume these parties were in college, and I understand partying is a college thing, but having to stay awake and comfort a drunk person for as long as they need is another thing. It demonstrates a disregard for your time and needs; weren't you tired, busy, and probably also drunk? You are accepting people who come to you at their most vulnerable but also their most unpredictable. We all have people in need we want to care for even when they are messed up, but she didn't say "my friends" or even "my girlfriends". She said people (it could be a wording thing, but this dialog is very intentional)

She seems proud of it, giving her limited time to confort people she may not be closed with.

Here is my point about the lie I think she believes. I was reading again How to Do the Work: Recognize Your Patterns, Heal from Your Past, and Create Your Self–by Dr. Nicole LePera, and there was this passage that sounded very familiar:

In the book, Dr. LePera explains "The 7 Inner Child Arquetypes" as behavior tendencies and internal beliefs that one may develop depending on the environment one grows up in. We don't know much about her childhood (I have a theory about it, which I will discuss in another post), but I think this description can apply to her behavior.

The issue here is not to "feel good to take care of people." There are many reasons one may do that, and many of them are altruistic in nature or just love for the person. the key element is the "disregarding of one's own needs." Look at me in the face and tell me that doesn't sound like Claire. She seems proud of how much people would go for her for comfort when she was a student in a very time-demanding career. It was likely very taxing, but she doesn't want to say it was. Not to mention that comforting somebody is emotional labor on its own.

The lie that Claire believes is that she needs to sacrifice (time/energy/emotional labor) to be loved, that only that is her worth as a person, particularly in the role of a caretaker of people in need.

And it also shows in her relationship with Carmy.

PART 2: LOOKING FOR THE LOVE

A scene that always stayed with me was this:

This "I know" seemed childish on my first watch, kinda saying "I know ligfe is not as complicated as you think."

But then I realized she was happy to say the right thing for him to love her. This "I know" is she saying, "I know I am perfect for you, I am catering especially to your needs" after saying, "Nobody is keeping track of shoes," which was kind of nonsensical, to begin with, but it also sounds like something from a Hallmark movie when they try to be profound and prophetic.

I want to bring the Caretaker Archetype to her relationship with Carmy because she also completely disregards her own needs with him. To begin with, when you have a profession with little time outside work, you probably will like it to be a good, stable one. Why are you chasing a guy who gave you a fake number and that you had to "push' for them to be with you? You even joke about the Faks beating him up for giving her a fake number, like wtf. In her interview, Molly Gordon talked about how Claire was pushed in a previous relationship, which gave her the idea pushing was okay, which is an entirely different conversation, but ok.

Regardless of that context, she went for a guy with also a time-demanding job, that you have seen in ages, and that you know it has social issues and comes from a family of addicts, and that family as a very tragic story.

Here is my biggest question:

DOES CLAIRE SEE CARMY AS ANOTHER "DRUNK, SAD PERSON"?

gif from @mporium

He may not be an addict, but he is aware of the substance; they made us watch her purposely giving him the soft drink; he didn't ask for one. Like she is saying, "I know you have this issue; look how good I am at anticipating your needs." Their first date was at a party, the place where she was to rescue a "sad drunk person," as she had done so many times.

Coming back to disregarding her own needs, she didn't establish boundaries or expectations throughout the whole relationship; she said, "I love you," after 2 months of fucking, no dates, and a homemade pasta dinner.

She squished herself into whatever hole Carmy needed her in. I have read in other posts that her profession does not give you much free time. Doesn't she sometimes need time of her own to keep studying, just relaxing?

I am aware they could have just not shown any of it, but when you are writing a romance, it is important to show how each person can satisfy the needs of the other; it is not supposed to be one-sided.

She doesn't discuss her stressful work or mean patients. She does not discuss her dreams; we don't even know her last name.

I think this is why she felt so empty to me: even in her conversations, she seemed to be mirroring him the whole time, looking to say the right thing. She only seemed to address her needs by asking him about the fake number because she felt rejected, and Carmy's pathetic response seemed to be what she needed to hear. For many people, that answer would have been a warning of someone not ready to be in a relationship. But for her, it was okay.

She has to be able to at least suspect his depression and other mental issues. She doesn't know about his fire incidents yet; why does a person look for a partner she has constantly to care for while he can't take care of her besides one dinner (or at least, she doesn't ask)? Because she finds her worth in caring for others while receiving very little in comparison. That is why their dynamic is that Claire is always giving and Carmy is always taking.

That is my theory. That's why many of her actions look both good-intentioned and manipulative because she is doing both. She wants to be loved in a very specific way after providing care and sacrificing a good deal herself. She wants to be loved because she does these things; that's how she earns it.

PART 3: ALWAYS SMILING

Gif de thoughtfulchaos773

She always makes this picture of perfect faces and soft smiles; a part of me wonders if she wants to display exactly that. She is inviting, always a calm and happy person, which is also on brand for someone who may have grown up finding worth in being pleasant to others. It is not like I hate pleasant female characters; I love a cinnamon roll any day, but this could be very performative, especially the way society pressures women to present themselves this way in order to be lovable. For Claire, this is the cherry on top of her masking to be a good caretaker, always available and welcoming.

This may also have a dark side. Why doesn't she recommend that Carmy seek professional help? Nobody wants to be confronted or hear that they are broken. She knows he may react negatively to her suggestion, so she doesn't do it; love is what she is after.

PART 4: CODEPENDENCY

This topic is huge, and I am gonna brush over it.

A person who only feels worth taking care of others will try to make the other person rely on them as much as possible. The party scene becomes dark-toned in this subtext. She brought him to a place where he felt like an outsider, she supported him in using a fake persona (ew), she knew there was gonna be alcohol there, didn't she feel bad that people may pressure him to drink, or she wanted to be his aid on the scenario (giving her the soft drink), she tried to make him fit in, even told him what to say in certain scenarios, especially when she was doing the thing she says she is so good at: taking care of the drunk friend. She kept bringing up in the phone conversation how much the Faks would be angry with him for rejecting her. She kept saying things like, "You could not have done this without me." Idk. Now that I keep thinking of the caregiver archetype, I can't unsee it.

Why did she leave that voicemail? Who says I love you for the first time in a voice message? On the opening day of the fucking restaurant? A very high-stress, demanding job, that day with so many things can go wrong?

Was it because she wanted her voice to comfort him during the most stressful times? The only comfort? Was she so sure that after all she had done for her, how could he not love her back?

PART 5: THE DOCTOR CONTRADICTION

This is to lomg, but to analyze Claire, I cannot ignore this part. I said this before in this post, but when Claire said:

I had to pause. That didn't sound like something a doctor would say. There is a reblog from @ciaonicole85 that I would like to quote:

I'm a healthcare provider, and I don't know anyone in my field who would say that setting a fire is cool. We're typically very respectful when talking about someone's dead family member, especially when suicide is a factor and mental health generally.

Then there is also the mention of discussing her classmate getting a broken arm in kindergarten. Quoting, again, from @brokenwinebox amazing post:

Claire: "When we were like six, she fell off a fence and broke her arm, and it scared the shit out of everybody. Except me, i just like sat there and stared at her arm." Carmy: "Cause you wanted to fix it?" Claire: "I wanted to understand it."

First of all, why is one thing exclusive to the other?  She said she wanted to understand it, almost as a priority to fix it. That is weird as fuck. She tried to make that distinction, that point. As @brokenwinebox mentioned, is this supposed to be a clue that she wants to understand more than fix? I think it is.

A little side note here, this line gave me a "I am not like other girls (or people for that matter)" vibe, because she made a point to say that everyone else freaked out but her, as if that made her extra brave or something, destined for what she does now, an emergency doctor, but no, a kid freaking out would be the most normal thing. The brave thing would have been asking for help, like wtf. But coming back to the point.

I am not saying Claire doesn't care about his patients or that she doesn't want to fix them. However, her dialogue displayed carelessness and ominous comments about other people getting hurt/sensible topics.

I don't think it's because she doesn't care but because she is attracted to risk. She mentioned she used to shoplift as a teen (I am not judging, but wtf). That surely will give her an adrenaline rush. She mentioned she likes driving because of the risk of it.

This also makes me think: Does she like Carmy because she thinks dating him can also be risky? Not in a dangerous context or anything, but because of how emotionally unreliable he is. There is a thing as always looking for emotionally unavailable people, and there is a psychological explanation for it, too.  

So yeah, those are my thoughts. Maybe s3 will prove me wrong.

Thank you so much for reading.

[nanthegirl]

🪻04.04.2024🪻 the date is so cute

• I studied Biomechanics for about 3 hours. Mainly just the intro to Clinical Gait Analysis. I made really rough notes in my ugly notebook cause I still haven’t decided how to divide the cute one. I didn’t even try to write pretty, I promise I can do better than that😭. I don’t mind rewriting them though cause I took them English cause the textbook is in English, so I’ll take the chance to translate them.

• We had an information seminar about writing a thesis and doing a practice project. I don’t have to think about those for a bit but I felt very motivated afterwards.

• I wrote a very short card for my friend’s birthday tomorrow and crocheted a headband. It’s a bit wonky at the edges and I just realized I could’ve gotten her a puzzle instead cause she loves those. I’m really rethinking gifting it to her but I’ll ultimately decide tomorrow.

All in all, I feel really good about today. I took a walk and had at least one nutritious meal and loads of water. I sat down and studied without doing my stupid ritual of scrolling on my phone and feeling guilty about not studying. My flatmate has people over so I couldn’t keep going but I’m proud of my progress. And I really enjoyed it.

[alicent-vi-britannia]

Why does Shirley have to die?

One of the most frequent comments I found while browsing when I entered this fandom and it bothered me greatly was that Shirley's death was useless, which reflected a lack of understanding of the series and the character of Shirley and her relationship with Lelouch and Suzaku. So today I'll explain what the effects of Shirley's murder were.

Broadly speaking, Shirley's murder serves as a catalyst between the first and second half of the second season. Likewise, Shirley's sad murder resonates with the main theme of the series and influences the narrative arcs of Lelouch and Suzaku.

1. Shirley's death was what pushed Lelouch to change his plans for the Geass Cult. Instead of controlling the orphans who had been turned into Geass users, Lelouch decided to destroy the Geass Cult by decimating the children and scientists who participated in the project by organizing a clandestine operation with the Black Knights.

1.1. This operation will later become one of the reasons why the Black Knights will betray Lelouch. It's information that is leaked to Asahina, a member of the Four Holy Swords, and reaches through him Tohdoh, who, together with Ohgi, were the ones who convinced the rest of the Black Knights that they were angry with Zero for abandoning them in the middle of the takeove of the Tokyo Settlement. So the massacre of the Geass Cult influenced the betrayal of Tohdoh, one of the pillars in the Order of the Black Knights and most loyal to their leader.

1.2. Additionally, the Black Knights' attack on the Geass Cult resulted in the death of V.V. and attracted the Emperor who took the code from V.V. and then attempted to initiate the Ragnarök Connection in episode 15, but C.C. prevented this by sealing her code and suppressing her memories. Something that will influence Lelouch's isolation. Also, in the massacre of the Geass Cult, Lelouch captured Cornelia, which will be important in the future.

2. Shirley's death was what pushed Suzaku over the edge and motivated him to coerce Kallen through refrain to get confirmation that Zero was behind her murder. About to do so, Suzaku realized that he was about to become completely corrupted and begins to rethink his beliefs and methods for the first time. It's because of this incident with Kallen that Suzaku is willing to reunite with Lelouch and team up with him, even if it means abandoning Britannia. But, well, Schneizel ambushes the two former friends and makes Lelouch believe that Suzaku betrayed him once again. Consequently, Lelouch is determined to kill Suzaku in revenge, but it turns out badly due to the cursed order he gave him long ago and which causes the total annihilation of the Tokyo Settlement, something that will mark a turning point in Suzaku's narrative arc and It will also affect Lelouch...

3. Shirley's death was a turning point in Lelouch and Rolo's relationship. It was a relationship in which love and hate were quite balanced, but, after this event, Lelouch leaned towards hate. I'll talk more about this point in my analysis of Rolo's motivations for killing Shirley, so that's all I'll say for now. I'll add that, if Mao made him realize that Geass can corrupt the user and Euphemia's death made Lelouch realize that Geass is an evil power, Shirley's death made Lelouch realize that Geass will condemn him to isolation (damn, Lelouch saw a lot of red flags and kept going; I don't know whether to call it idiocy or determination). At the same time, he realized how terrible the power of Geass is in the hands of a child and became terrified that all Geass users were like Rolo, which is why he thinks it is better to eradicate the Geass Cult and not control them.

4. Shirley's death is linked to the main theme of the series (will) and, in a certain way, influenced the epiphany that Lelouch will have in the final stretch of the series. Rolo didn't get into a vehicle, he drove to Shirley's house and got out to shoot her. No. Shirley was murdered, following her will. She abandoned the security force that was guarding her because she wanted to offer her help to Lelouch. To paraphrase Lelouch's words to Schneizel in the series' penultimate episode, people are actively seeking happiness, and for Shirley, her happiness was with Lelouch. Even though Lelouch erases her memory over and over again to protect her, Shirley will always do what her will dictates, and that includes falling in love with him again. Shirley's firm resolve, added to that of other characters, is what teaches Lelouch to value human beings' will and constant pursuit of happiness.

In short, Shirley's death is what leads to most of the events that occur in the second part of R2. Without that, the Zero Requiem doesn't even take place. For all this, it is ridiculous that the alternate universe continues with the same events as the canonical universe, but, well, nothing makes sense in the alternate universe (hence it is complete garbage and I'll maintain this statement until the last day of my existence.)

Having said that. If anyone still wants to be angry about Shirley's death, they have to change their focus on her. The point isn't that Shirley's murder adds nothing to the plot (we already saw that it isn't true); but this seems to show that Shirley is a "woman in refrigerator." This is a term coined by Gail Simone to refer to female characters who face disproportionate harm, which will serve as a plot device to motivate male characters. The term was used to talk about situations in Western comics, but can be extrapolated to other media. Is Shirley a "woman in refrigerator"? I would say yes, but I think that term should be applied when there are female characters who have great potential and the authors don't exploit it, but rather prefer to reduce them to a motivation for the current male hero. And Shirley is not Kallen (an action heroine and Knightmare pilot, whose talent and skill can change the flow of a battle), she is not C.C. (an Immortal Witch who knows all the secrets of Geass and is clandestinely working with our protagonist's worst enemy for her own interests), she is not Euphemia (a princess in the Holy Empire of Britannia who can challenge the status quo and change the system from the inside), she is not Nina (a prodigy in science, capable of creating a weapon of mass destruction). She's only Shirley. An innocent civilian trapped in a bloody war. She cannot contribute more than she can, so let's not ask for pears from the elm.

I really wanted to write this analysis! I just removed a thorn that was stuck. I feel better.

[sugar-grigri]

Fujimoto : + = -

I don't really have time to do a really interesting analysis, but here are a few thoughts

I'm doing what I've been doing for several chapters now: interpreting in reverse.

Because although the chapter is fascinating when interpreted in the right way, the opposite way makes things even more exciting.

It's simple: Denji isn't reconstituted; humanity and demons are reconstituted.

It's the "kids" who are rebuilding Denji, just as humanity has rebuilt itself, rebuilding an image of its savior Chainsaw Man.

The demons have no interest in this image, because they don't idolize Chainsaw Man. Mankind has to reconstitute its savior first, so that the demons can take him down later - that's the order of things, and it's up to the kids to do it, certainly not the demons.

Why does Fami help? Because she used this image precisely because she knew what CSM meant to humanity.

And Katana is a subtle case: the use of "kids" forces us to see him as a demon, but also as an adult. Katana claims to still belong to humanity with his human heart, but that doesn't change anything. Humanity certainly projects itself in Chainsaw Man, but there are dissidences. And the fact remains that it's youth that's subjected to this image.

In this image, humanity finds meaning in creation, while demons find meaning in their very existence.

Fighting, taking revenge, devouring Chainsaw Man - that's how the demons intend to make sense of themselves: in direct combat, not in salvation.

Above all, the nail fiend refers to interesting things: stupidity itself, or better said, living more lightly is fun.

What's even more amusing in this line is that the nail fiend says that Yoru/Asa doesn't understand this as a high-school girl.

School is the most powerful socializing experience, the most grueling confrontation with others, and the one that will have the greatest impact on our personality and our approach to happiness. Happiness we achieve by unlearning, by taking life less seriously.

Unlearning, i.e. removing knowledge from the brain, brings something positive, happiness. To put it another way: moving backwards allows you to move forwards.

Although Yoru is a devil herself, she's already decomposed, but above all, this maxim of seeing life with less seriousness is one that Asa experienced with Denji: having fun allows you to escape misfortune.

Asa and Yoru are not yet familiar with these different ways of looking at life, which is why it's a good idea to rethink the puzzle of their existence.

And in this scene, another puzzle comes together. Denji has seen Asa, he has also unknowingly seen Yoru, as he repeatedly insists on their kiss. But Asa has never seen has never seen the whole of Denji's being, adding to his person CSM. And so that the pieces fit together properly, she's allowed to see Denji without him being able to see her, with that (almost martyred) upward gaze.

Fujimoto takes his time to complete the puzzle, first Yoru sees him... then Asa.

And then Quanxi intervenes, the one who had requested her beheading to spare her girlfriends...

A sacrifice can complete other pieces, other mosaics of life

And it's a theme I love, but in CSM, subtraction is as good as addition.

In other words, even broken down, Denji completes the others, and even in this state, he is precisely Chainsaw Man, that entity into which we project ourselves, from which we draw to complete ourselves.

So, to sum up in even simpler terms: Pochita marks the beginning and the end of the devils' lives.

He is the precise reason for their existence and death

Saving is indeed fighting Chainsaw Man

[nostalgicmiscellaneous]

Finally tomorrow i have time to rewatch S3 again. I love to discover something i haven't noticed yet everytime i watch. Even some interpretations i had, it makes me rethink. I think this season, with how much the characters internalize things, allows us to truly go further with our analysis. Specially Colin, we have so much to talk about him and his every scenes, mirroring his part 1 behavior with his revelations in part 2. I could write pages about all he confessed about himself, about Pen and his family, in the Cressida scene. That's why i encourage a careful rewatch of S3. Pay attention, the acting choices and the body language, the words and behaviors that are later on addressed, directly or with a change. So interesting.

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Gale’s Analysis: Felix Fathom (The Shadow of Perfection)

I am a Felix enjoyer. I was fine with his introduction, and I was fine with his role in the story. And I never really looked too much into his stake in the story until we actually learn who and What he is.

(Spoilers if you haven’t seen it)

Felix is a Sentibeing, just like Adrien is. But he was created by his Father, Colt Fathom. Out of jealousy over Gabriel and Emilie’s child. Giving up his bodyguard in the exchange.

Colt felt his health decline and feeling as if he basically sold his soul blamed Felix’s existence for this instead of himself. It’s heavily implied there was abuse and that he may have even killed Felix by destroying his Amok once.

After learning the truth, Felix made it his goal to take the power that created him, so that no one would have to suffer like him.

Not knowing the details of how he was created, he first set his sights on the Graham de Vanily Rings. Believing they had the power he was looking for. He was dismissive of Adrien and looked to stir chaos, (in the episode, Felix) upon rewatch we see that Felix never meant to cause actual harm to Adrien, he only wanted a deal that would help him get the rings he wanted. Not caring about the people involved.

The next time we see him (In Gabriel) he has done more research and learned what the True item was that created him. The Peacock miraculous. And he had suspicion that Gabriel was the one who had it. So his goal, steal the Peacock. Of course, Felix failed to get it, BUT he did confirm Gabriel had it. Leading to his next plan.

In Risk and Strikeback. He saw his cousins vulnerability, and decided to use it to infiltrate the manor, while giving Adrien a break from his life. Perfect chance to get what he wanted. Of course Felix confirmed a LOT after that. Including that His Aunt was in a glass coffin. And thinking he got what he wanted, he left. Getting the information how to work the peacock and the peacock itself… unfortunately, that wasn’t the case. It was a fake peacock miraculous.

But as luck would have it, Ladybug showed up asking for Adrien’s help. (And Felix happened to be pretending to be Adrien) so Felix jumped at the chance. Getting ironically the Perfect power to get what he wanted.

And we see some hesitation before going forward with his plan… until he witnesses the death of the sentimonster strikeback. Being a Sentimonster himself, he knew he needed to go through with his plan.

And sure enough Felix trades the other miraculous AND the Ring he stole for the Peacock. The one thing he wanted to ensure HIS freedom.

But now that no one could Poof him with a snap of the fingers, his true plan could unfold.

The world of people that thought so little of sentimonsters… time for his people to rise up. Thus we get Emotion.

Felix in an ironic action Snaps away the people who threatened him. And actually does win… only to see the misery he inflicted on his cousin and the other sentimonster, Kagami.

After this Felix has to rethink his actions, as not all normal people are bad, and even with his power he can’t stand against Monarch/Gabriel now. As he revealed his hand. His chance was gone.

The only thing he could do. Try to help that Girl he met. Cue the Feligami. Because without a means to fight Gabriel and no way that ladybug or chat noir would trust him. He was SOL.

Until learning from Kagami that Marinette was Ladybug. Making her able to understand the situation. Someone that loved Adrien and understood Gabriel as a threat. She could hear his plea. He was convinced to trust her.

Thus, he explains the backstory to her resulting in the events of the finale.

___________________________________________

Now you notice how I called Felix the Shadow of perfection, in the title. It’s actually quite simple.

Felix is basically the shadow while Adrien is the light.

Adrien doesn’t know about the dark history. He doesn’t know Gabriel is Monarch, doesn’t know he’s a sentimonster, he doesn’t know about anything regarding his family’s past. Adrien only saw the good, the pleasant memories. All of that dark business is hidden, it’s in the shadows. That’s where Felix is. Felix is the Adrien of the Dark. He’s the one that learns the secrets, does the digging, handles all the grief and strain so Adrien can be the bright sun princess. Felix is the thief of the night. Even his creation was made with envy as the base emotion. Adrien was made of love, a bright emotion. While Felix of envy, a dark emotion.

Even Felix ending up with Kagami is fascinating because Kagami (her name being mirror) and Felix being a mirror of Adrien. It fits that Felix would relate to Kagami.

It’s also fascinating when we think of the promotional video. Felix was the original Chat noir, but before the show aired, he was replaced with Adrien. Only to then be rewritten into the show. He has become the shadow of his former self.

In the end, Felix couldn’t help in the final confrontation (ignoring writing choices) because he wasn’t one of the heroes. And Adrien couldn’t because he was left in the dark on all of the things he would need to know to be a part of the finale. Felix was the piece needed for the writers to write the finale as a final confrontation between Marinette and Gabriel. Because Adrien never knew and Felix wasn’t the hero of the story.

Ironic how both the light and dark were not complete and thus could not be present in the finale