#and I can't get past it 🙃
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Taking pictures for a monthly challenge going on over on the bird hellsite. Hence the armour set I don't usually wear...
Assassin's Creed Valhalla
#assassin's creed#assassin's creed valhalla#ac valhalla#valhalla#eivor#eivor varinsdóttir#eivor wolfkissed#eivor wolf kissed#virtual photography#photomode#video game#playstation#ps5#*whispers* I don't usually wear this armour because I think Ubisoft somehow managed to make the fabric look like cheap printed polyester 😬#don't know HOW they managed that#it doesn't look like a natural woven patterned fabric at all#and I can't get past it 🙃
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OKAY time to share my two cents that nobody asked for on this scenario. yeah, I'm disappointed. ngl this is casting a pall over my replay of the series and general enthusiasm (which sucks but I know I'll bounce back very quickly, it'll take FARRR more than something like this to kill it). regardless of the impact of our choices or lack thereof, I have faith that veilguard will be a great game because I haven't been let down by a dragon age game yet. the concept of worldstates is a HUGE reason why this series is special to me, but it's not the only reason.
that being said, yeah, it's pretty fucking weird to have so... few... choices represented in the CC. especially if you think about how impactful everything that is NOT being represented is. so many things stop making sense.
we saw our choices mattering less as we moved from DA2 -> DA:I, but nothing of this caliber. its.... idk. idk what else to call it beyond weird and disappointing
we still can't say anything is for certain until we play through the entirety of veilguard itself but I'm definitely much more wary than I was before
#sadddddddddd#it's gonna be a great game. I know that in my heart. but this truly just doesn't make any sense to me#when I tell you I'd be happy with crumbs. but I don't think we're even getting crumbs (in regards to past choices events etc.)#I love my rook(s) already!! I LOVE our new companions!! Im sure I'll have so much fun and be filled with so much inspiration#while/after playing veilguard#but is the concept of worldstates effectively dead now? (except for in *our* DA 🙃)#it wouldn't be AS disappointing if there weren't so many loose ends regarding our protags#what is going on with the warden? who is in the fade and what's happening with them? how could nothing about our inquisitor matter if#they are showing up in this game?#and I can't comfort myself with the hope that these things might be represented in the NEXT next game because when is that gonna happen?#10 years from now? 20? if at all?#it's one thing to not represent something because it will have no relevance. it's another thing entirely to invalidate or misrepresent or#contradict our choices or our characters. and I simply don't see how that's NOT going to happen given what we know now#anyway welcome to me processing my emotions in realtime. sorry you had to see it lmaooo#da4#da4 spoilers#dragon age#bioware critical#I guess
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Welp... only a month left till my birthday.
...
I'm not prepared whatsoever 😬
#ever since I turned 30 I can't seem to feel excited about my birthday anymore...#guess it's not only because I'm getting old (VERY old OMG)#but also because... it's just not the same it used to be#every birthday reminds me of the people I used to celebrate it with in the past and who are not in my life anymore#and just... assuming that those people were not meant to be a permanent part of my life is hard#and even though it somehow gets easier as time goes by#there are certain times when it actually gets harder#I don't know I'm just getting too introspective lol#guess this is why I needed some time alone today...#it wasn't just a “meh” mood due to my period#there was more lying beneath the surface 🙃#anyways lol I'm getting older in one month and I'm not prepared how does the time fly so damn FAST 😭#I swear I was just turning 32 yesterday what the h—#zahra's ramblings#don't mind me
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So turns out that I can't start any crochet small business because I live in hell and it takes too much money to be allowed to sell and even if my father did offer to try somehow to make it happen I just prefer to wait until I move from this shit place
#back to programming and not only programming back to what's probably the most boring programming thing ever#my depression back when i was learning how to work on WordPress was so fucking bad 🙃#but i have lots of bases on this and I'd work with my father so it should get me money quickly#logically this is better because it allows me to make money in multiple ways but emotional#emotionally* it fucking sucks and I've cried most of the past 24 hours#life really is shit uh I don't even want to try to do the fun programming because becoming a game dev looks like a sure failure with the#current state of the industry and I can't make money with crafts until i have money to start#just pain for me 😭
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one more post while i am insane but i do think maybe Wanting to live should be ... enough to live. like can it just be all that is needed maybe. instead of [gestures vaguely at capitalistic society] all of that. a person should just Want to be alive and be allowed to live and given what they need to live. i dont want to have to beg and grovel for the ability to keep myself alive, i already did that (and continue to do that!) with my parents and now apparently i have to do that with the govmt and just... Everything.
#pippen needs 2nd breakfast#this is mainly just. why do i need to work when i Cannot work.#i wanted to work ! i really did ! but then things did not line up properly and now i am fucked !!!#and i cannot get onto disability bc that would involve so much sneaking around getting shit done and i Cannot risk it#i have simultaneously nothign to lose and everything#like. if i get caught by parents applying for disability then i will be in so much fucking trouble#my already nearly intolerable living situation will get Truly Intolerable. and then i'll be dead basically#and i dont even really qualify for disability bc i can Do stuff still. i just... can't do it often enough to make a living.#regular ass ppl can barely make a living. i'd never even come close#me when my disability is disabling enough to Need disability payments but not disabling enough to Qualify for disability payments 🙃🙃🙃#straight up i am tired. i am so tired. i cannot see a way of living past whenever my bank account runs out.#like no i dont want to kms but yeah im gonna kind of have to ... ?????#because what do i do fhsdfjkl there is not a way to live !!!! idk man its fine its just fucked up#i'll go eat some food and not think about this. i feel like a rat stuck in a death maze#no matter which exit you take u know ur going to be euthanized at the end. ARGH !!#suicide tw
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^ live footage of me rn
#friday chats#tw vent#not like a super terrible vent or anything i'm just. tired. and mad at myself.#so like a couple weeks ago i was given an assignment for my british lit class right?#to write a research essay based on one of the texts we've studied this unit. two weeks to do it. easy peasy. sure.#i figure that's plenty of time and leave it to work on my other homework (bc there's always other homework i'm an honors student)#oh wow lookie there it's due this weekend! great! so i start work on it#and then i can't find any research to bolster the question i'd formulated. it would have just been my own analysis#and we're required to have four sources. so that's that out the window.#the weekend passes and i'm officially in ''late assignment'' territory#and it's the last week before spring break so i'm swamped w/other work and midterm tests and everything#so yesterday my friend and i call to work on ours together (we always proofread each other's stuff/give each other pointers and whatnot)#and i'm just lost on what my essay should be about. any sort of question i could explore.#she has something of an idea for hers but not much. so neither of us get ours done#the assignment fully closes tonight#so we try again. i manage a half-hearted intro paragraph with zero direction and one source#and then i just hit a wall. the sources i'm looking at don't give me any new insights or ideas and i've got nothing#with two hours to the deadline. so i'm thoroughly fucked#i keep trying and just. yeah no not a thing. and if you notice the timestamp on this post it's past 12am#guess who didn't finish his essay 🙃#this is the fucking SECOND TIME THIS HAS HAPPENED. what the FUCK#fanTASTIC start to my spring break y'all. and the only way i can communicate the specific feeling i'm feeling is through a homestuck gif.#can i just sink into the earth. that'd be great#at least now that it's over i don't have to worry about it anymore. i mean there's the guilt obviously but i don't have to *worry*#God. my mom's gonna be pissed#if i follow this train of thought any further it's gonna fall down a spiral of responsibility and college and career stuff#and i don't want to deal with that right now#so i'm just gonna stop talking. and either go read an angsty fic and cry for catharsis or just go to sleep. we'll see#i hate getting all personal on the internet but i'd rather yell to the void than bottle it up so. here we are
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This whole experience of being nonstop hounded by bots has made the idea of people paying for fake followers even more bizarre to me. Like. Literally what value do you get from that. None of those accounts are real. What is the appeal.
#like what possible value do you get from that as a person#why would anyone want this#had to turn my notifications off because the nonstop new follower notice was stressing me tf out#also contacted support about it and they were like 'sowwy we can't do anything 🤷' like girl it's YOUR website#i dont know the exact count since im reporting and blocking as they come but based on how many i get overnight and how often they come in#its getting close to 1k over the past 5 days 🙃
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Y'all this is so funny. I actually can't make an Instagram account.
#indi's night talk#trying to do it on mobile I can't even get past entering a password#like literally nothing happens when I tap next#and on pc I enter the email confirmation code and it's immediately like#'your account has been suspended!'#????? literally what#and then I try to appeal get the email code and then go to get the text message code and I'm not getting the message#I've clicked request new code about a thousand times now 🙃#and like. fuck that platform but I wanted access to some specific content and I'm kinda fuckin mad about it
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it's wild because over the years i've gone from shipping nive with some degree or other of fluff/happy endings (or at least hopeful ones; or if it does end badly, it's due to external factors) to just unabashedly wanting them to make each other Worse
#lorien legacies#nive#LL nive#LL number nine#LL number five#five's shifting blame for his behavior onto other people/factors versus nine's gleefully seeking out targets to hurt#in situations where the power dynamic is in his favor; or he plans for it to be#and escalating every single time they make any move to set boundaries or push back; or otherwise not take it lying down#because he KNOWS there will not be consequences for his actions; other than a finger wag from someone who does#have the power to do something; because he's the group's ~lovable impulsive jerk~ and everyone will tell victims to ~get used to it~ 🙃#and he keeps doing this and acting like he has that same power in the situation past the point where he doesn't#and is shit at actually evaluating that point; and then goes surprisedpikachu.png when there are ACTUALLY consequences#and then immediately starts trying to gloss it over and act like everything's fine when he KNOWS he fcked up past what was worth it#and then he does it again later!!! his entire relationship to a victim past the point where he can't establish /control/ to hurt them#is a) punishing them for it relentlessly; b) trying to turn other people against them/get said people on his side about targeting them#and c) is constantly CONSTANTLY pushing and pushing and pushing to trap them again where he can hurt them and get away with it#all while their only options are to be punished for standing up for themselves; or finally snapping and lashing out#and getting punished for THAT#they both have yikes beliefs re: potential abuse rhetoric that they need to address to grow past and get better#but i am significantly less sympathetic to nine's bc he fully gets away with it by the narrative's standards#and then DOESN'T address it even when he has years of breathing room; support; and Basic Fckin Maslowe Needs to do so#whereas five's circumstances from the end of UaO onward are... holy shit Not That at All; and extremely do not give him that chance#and EVEN THEN he's still grown beyond the initial steps of unraveling that logic; and continues to improve#whereas nine just gets worse and worse and becomes a MAGA ass piece of shit who has an entire persecuted; genocided race to do this to#anyway. need to write fic about them#lorien legacies tag#LL crit tag#shipping#abuse cw#dyn: lost boys
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finally got our adhd meds refilled and i dont think our brain is handling being on the full dosage again well
#we are vibrating and hearing shrimp colours#i actually CAN'T focus. i dont think that's normal?#pk;m electrochemistry🔴#we've been taking halves the past week bc our meds run out a week before we can get them refilled 🙃 fhdjdjdjdj
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we have an appointment later and that means I have to get up in 5 hours and if you're wondering why I'm going to bed late enough to only get 5 hours of sleep (probably less actually) it's because our sleep schedule got pushed forwards and we've been unable to sleep until 10am lately and I have to get up at 11am.
but also I have a migraine which is actually kind of my own fault for watching a movie that made me cry because that's what triggered it, but I kind of didn't expect to end up with a migraine, let alone the kind where there are huge blind spots in my peripheral vision and I can't stop shaking. so that's not exactly ideal 💀.
anyway, this appointment could have been a phone call. it's an appointment to get meds and for the last 3 years they've let us just do a telephone appointment and then sent us the meds, but nope. we have to actually go there in person again now and I have to deal with using way more energy than necessary, going to a clinic that's especially triggering for us, and potentially fucking up our sleep schedule even more
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#I get why they want us to go in but it fucking sucks when we've seen that there's an alternative option that we've had access to for 3 year#and I also am just very aware that 1. I will freak the fuck out if a medical professional touches me#(which they will because the main reason they gave for us going in was wanting to check our blood pressure)#and 2. we've had bad experiences at this clinic in the past and I can't see that mixing well with our medical trauma from earlier this year#oh and we once told them we were trans. they literally gave us a form to put our details on and it had a section to mention that#and they still misgendered us and one nurse looked at us weirdly when we were like ''oh actually I'm a trans guy''#but unfortunately this clinic is our only option as far as we're aware so 🙃 guess I'll just suffer 👍#I'm definitely more worked up about this than I would probably otherwise be#just because it's the first appointment we've had since all the shit that happened in late April/early May
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#fucking daddy issues strike again 🙃🙃🙃#i hate that I'm weak like this#why can't i ever get strong enough to get past it#why do i have to care so much about what he thinks???????
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I just wanna say that I am SO excited for the part 2 to your Paul Destiny fic. I have so many questions and Im excited to see if they get answered. Like if Paul is pledging his love to the reader then is the romance plot with Chani still relevant? Is the reader still the princess here? Very interesting
Imagine if Paul Atreides claimed you as his destiny: PART Ⅱ of Ⅱ
|| Word Count: 1.7K || Fluff ||
A/N: Honestly, I didn't think this would blow up so much- 1k+ likes??! Thank you all, it's sick 🙃 in answer to your questions, I didn't really specify if the reader (you) are part of a Great House or the Emperor's daughter, or maybe someone else, that's kind of up to your imagination. And yeah, sorry Chani fans, I kind of kicked her to the curb lmao; This is all about you, and so enjoy the second and final part of this destiny trope before I work on some relationship headcanons for Paul and Feyd-Rautha... Requests are open for Dune 2, so don't be shy 📩
You can't escape fate.
It's as real as the Spice that threads through the grains of sand blanketing Arrakis in heavy, warm golden waves. It twists and turns in the air, in the tides of change, something beyond understanding roping together reality and its lives to bond, whether in love or hate.
At least, with the newly ascended young Emperor, you know which side you're on. Since the day of his declaration and claiming of you as his Empress, you've never once left his sight, unknowingly or not. The boy is almost ridiculously close and observant, as if testing the depths of the events unfolding around him, testing to see whether you'll try to run from them, from him. But you can't run from fate, either.
"You aren't resting."
Paul's soft, low voice slices through the silence of the dusk, the only words you hear before you feel his warm, firm arms slipping under your arms and around your middle, pulling you into his front in a smooth, protective motion. His chocolate brown locks tickle your neck and cheek as he gazes up at you from your shoulder; wandering, curious eyes study yours knowingly, his natural hues tainted blue with the Spice.
"What troubles you?"
You hesitate in your response, unsure of the right thing to say. There's no point in lying, not to him, to a boy who could easily use the power of his Voice to make you tell him everything and anything with just a few words. He's done it to the Bene Gesserit, to those who speak out of turn and challenge him cluelessly, but never to you. And something tells you that he never will.
"I'm sorry," is how you answer instead, in a small whisper, trying to read his expression before his reaction.
But all Paul does is give you one of his soft, amused smirks, a brow raising slightly, unconvinced.
"Don't apologise to anyone for anything," he murmurs, his fingers drifting to lock with yours, his hand hot and strong in yours. "We are to be wed, you and I, soon. So what troubles you?"
"It's not you," you tell him as earnestly as you can, his eyes capturing yours and holding them as you blink up at him. "I'm just... nervous."
"Nervous?" Paul repeats gently, his hands squeezing yours for a moment, his face an inch away from yours. "What have you to be nervous about?" He grins slightly, not attempting to hide his teasing amusement. "A wedding?"
You can't help but smile at his tone, savouring the unguarded moments of the new, young Emperor, his boyish traits lingering beneath the newfound power and promises passed down to him.
You were nervous, because you weren't so familiar with destiny and its quirks, and yet, Paul Atreides seemed to be its master. Nervous, because although there was a strange pull between you and him, a deeper part of you somehow knowing him, at an instinctive ease with him, you had never met him before these past few days, and now, you were going to be joined together for time indefinite by marriage. Nervous, because he didn't just want you to rule with him, but alongside him, as a partner, a second part of him. His second half who's with him in soul, not just spirit, physically, not just mentally. And he's relishing in it.
"I've never had one before," you shake your head with a light smile, "I don't know what to expect. Or what's expected of me."
Paul hums to himself at your reply, pausing for a while as he thinks over his words.
"It isn't just a wedding," he tells you quietly, "it's so much more. This... this a beginning. A new dawn."
"Beginning?" You echo in bemusement, looking up at him in wonder. "Of what?"
"Of a new era," Paul says thoughtfully, his hands moving from yours to run over and down your sides, tracing over your figure absentmindedly, a gesture that makes you hold your breath for a beat as you watch him, "the first of many. You are more than a mere future. You're the future. My future. And the future of my people."
The sincerity and conviction in his voice makes you stare back at him in slight awe, taken by his certainty of what he's seen in the deepest stretches of his mind, the flickering images of you, adorned in all your natural beauty and grace that he could find nothing short of perfect. You were a fantasy and a hope materialised. Someone he'd wished and dreamed for so much, that you came true, just as you should have.
"Anything that happens to you," Paul continues, looking you straight in the eye as he speaks, "happens to me. You have always been mine, and I was yours before then. Absolutely and completely."
And his words make a home in your head, everything he says so poetic and beautifully surreal, but so honest and unwaveringly confident. He didn't need to practise what he said before he whispered the sweet words in your ear, in a voice only you could catch, in the long, warm nights on Arrakis. There was no need for practice. He had been made for this, and he wouldn't have it any other way.
You let yourself relax slightly in his grips, giving him an earnest smile. "That sounds nice."
Paul smiles back at you, a bright, sweet smile that makes him seem so soft and normal, almost forgetting for a moment of his utter strength and glory over the planets, his dangerous darkness that he occasionally allowed to rule over his actions at the tensest of times, until those who stood up against him retreated in bewilderment and fascination and fear.
"It does," he agrees, his gaze dropping to look out at the dunes beyond you, "you can't imagine..."
You couldn't. But every part of you wanted to. And those parts won.
"Won't you tell me?"
Paul's attention shifts back to you after you speak, before you can stop yourself.
"Would it be kind to tell you?" He asks aloud, speaking half to himself as his eyes go to search yours again, studying every inch of you, almost unsettlingly intently.
"Do you dream?" Paul questions you softly, and you dither before shaking your head.
"Not like you do," you answer steadily.
"Like I do. Seeing your face amidst the streaks of sunbeams and every kind of ethereal power that could create wonders, planets, worlds. Waking up, and you're not here, though it felt so real," he goes on, his voice laced with longing, as if it pained him to remember the feeling. "Realer than I've ever felt anything before. Every sense in me was awakened, because with destiny, I saw hope. And I did not know that hope could be so.... beautifully... angelic."
Paul draws closer and closer with each word, pulled by invisible strings to rest his forehead against yours, closing his eyes for a long moment to breathe, breathe you in. The sight of it is almost dizzyingly hypnotic, staring at the little scattered freckles over his fair, lightly tanned skin, cheeks flushed golden. He moves his face to rub his cheek against yours, seeking out affection in an irresistible rare, vulnerable move. Your hand reaches up to brush your fingers against it, and he takes it in his immediately, pressing his lips against your fingertips as he speaks.
"I need you," Paul insists, his voice firm and pressing again as he stares at you with a spark of desperation. "I need only you. More than you can comprehend. By my side, always, where you belong."
"I'm right here," you reply a little giddily, looking away from his eyes slightly bashfully from the intensity and unbridled longing of his gaze. "I suppose I'm just not used to this."
"To what?" Paul questions, his fingers tilting your chin up softly to force your eyes back up to his, his face a little closer than before. "To being an Empress?"
Before you can respond, he's pushed himself closer over you, his warm, damp lips sliding and pressing against yours and parting to encourage you to deepen his affections. It sends hot shockwaves rushing straight through your blood, as Paul crouches over you, all patience and purpose forgotten in the moment where it's just the two of you in the calm, lingering desert night.
You fit together perfectly, too perfectly for his words to be untrue, and his head tilts keenly where your fingers skim his neck, his lips parting from yours as they tangle in his hair with a short gasp. He loses none of his confidence and persistence, his azure blue eyes a shade darker as he watches you with an open trace of adoration.
"A queen?"
"Paul," you start shakily, as he smirks at you fondly, his head ducking to trace his tongue briefly up the skin of your neck, with a faint chuckle.
"To being desired?"
You glare at him weakly, hanging onto his hands tight to find some sense of grounding. "You're just playing with me."
"I intend to do so much more than that," Paul grins at you, kissing your cheek before burying his face against your shoulder. "And so should you. Test the depths of our connection. Push it to its limits. Push me. Please."
You find yourself speechless again at his way with words, simple and truthful, but full of passion and unthought romance, a sensation he's been craving since the first shadows of your being in his hazy dreams and visions.
"Give into your destiny, sweet girl," he croons to you in a whisper, his lips brushing against yours and pressing down against your skin needily, hungrily. It takes almost inhumane strength not to crumble and shiver under his touch and desire radiating off him and his dark glare, the wanting over years of dreams and prophecies building up to its peak. "Give into me."
"I think I will," you whisper back in awe and giddiness, your arms having to hold tightly around his neck to stay upright. "I think I want to."
"That's good," he praises you with a soft smile, as his voice lowers. "And besides," Paul mutters in your ear, nuzzling against your cheek breathlessly, with that subtle, teasing look in his eyes, "I plan on taking you as mine well before the wedding."
══════════════⊹⊱≼ fin ≽⊰⊹══════════════
Taglist (lmk if you want to be added to this for my future Dune fanfics): @minaxcarter @milaeth @ennycutie @weird0o0 @aoi-targaryen @jindongdongie
#paul atredies x reader#paul atreides imagine#paul atreides x reader#paul atreides x you#paul atreides#dune x reader#dune x you#timothee chalamet x you#paul atredies smut#paul atreides oneshot#dune spoilers#dune imagine#dune 2024#timothee fanfic#timothee x reader#timothee imagine#timothee chalamet#timothee chamalet#chalamet#dune fandom#dune fanfiction#paul atreides fanfic
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loml
pairing: max verstappen x reader
summary: a journey through your relationship with max
a/n: so for a little background... my ex (he wasn't an F1 fan, it was never gonna work, let's be real) broke up with me the night before this album was released, so writing this series has been very healing; however, this one was extremely difficult to write bc it's the only song i can't analytically listen to and find the deeper meanings yet, especially after losing your first love. sorry for the rant and making this short🙃
tw: emotional abuse, manipulation
masterlist ttpd masterlist part two
________
You and Max were fan favorites, it was evident to anyone with eyes who had eyes. But they say you never know what happens behind closed doors.
“She’s the love of my life,” Max would always say about you, looking at you like you held the universe in the palm of your hand. His fans could recite your love story by heart from how much he loved to talk about you. It only made sense that he could shatter that public opinion.
“Y/n and I have divorced, I would like to ask for privacy as we navigate the changes,” Max posted one day, his socials wiped of everything. Your accounts remained the same, your last post being from the fateful race months ago. You haven’t posted since. The fans should’ve realized when the WAGs and George unfollowed Max.
Your apartment was full of things that reminded you of Max, every time you walked in it reminded you of every memory. He was embroidered in everything. You look at a printed photo of when you first met him. Despite it being six months later, you couldn’t get rid of him.
~~~
All it took was locking eyes with him across the pier for you to fall in love on that breezy summer day. He walked up to you and asked you to join him, and you did. You kissed him at the top of the ferris wheel later that night, and you didn’t even know he was famous all you knew was that he made you feel safe. The breeze reminded you of the warm ocean breeze from that day, one you called the winds of fate.
Despite being young, you married him after a year of being together. Things weren’t perfect even then, he could be incredibly mean, but he was also a standup guy when it mattered. That erased any wrongdoing of his.
“You have made me a better man, you reformed me, the love of my life,” Max had said that fall evening, repeating the one line that brought you back to him every time.
You believed his words, his lies spun to make you believe the hell you were living in was actually heaven. When he takes his anger out at you, doesn’t defend you against his father, you start to second guess him but he calls you those four words.
“I’ll never leave you, Schatje,” Max holds you in his arms, your back against his chest as you both look at a tv in the Paddock. The fans loved that photo, calling your love legendary. They didn’t know about the growing hole in your heart.
Your marriage was looking like one of those black and white movies you and Max watch on snowy winter afternoons. You and Max had been talking about starting a family, but you couldn’t get pregnant and you were watching everything you loved slip away.
“God, Max, you are like a con-man. I feel like I’ve been sold a get-love-quick scheme. What happened to you?” you ask, voice laced with hurt, during an argument about it. Max just ignored you, pushing past to stream with some friend. He ignored the sobs coming from your bedroom. He told the chat that you are the love of his life when asked about you.
“Y/n, we need to talk,” some of the WAGs pulled you aside during a race. They told you how Max was shit talking you to other drivers, saying you were a waste of a wife for your inability to get pregnant, saying he should’ve never married you, pointing out every flaw he told you was beautiful when he was lying to your face. You stand up and leave, not saying a word even when the girls try to stop you. Max is confused but simply responds to your text saying you were sick with an okay.
You are laying in your bed sobbing when Max gets back from the race. You face the terrace, where you and Max would dance under the stars. You can see the ghosts of it through your tears, and you wished you could un-recall when you thought you had everything.
“Please get out of bed,” Max says, his concerned tone laced with venom. Maybe the ghosts of your relationship are embarrassed by the scene on the other side of the glass.
“No,” you cry, mourning the loss of your counterfeit relationship.
“I’ll be back in a few hours,” Max sighs leaving the room. You sent a text to the WAG group chat who helped you remove all your belongings from Max’s apartment into George’s apartment that he wasn’t using at the moment.
Your phone is flooded with messages from Max, so you turn it off unless you are talking to your lawyer. Max finds a divorce petition and your apartment key on the dining room table when he comes home from training a few days later. The relationship that had such a valiant roar ended with the blandest goodbye.
You sit in George’s apartment with Carmen and Lily drinking wine. You took over George’s lease after they insisted that you did.
“For someone who claims to be a lion, he sure is a manipulative coward,” Carmen says as the three of you comb through the years of lies he spun.
You took the dreams that you thought you and Max wanted and lit the match to destroy them with your divorce papers. Despite your somber eyes, you seem more at peace, even with the sadness you will carry with you until you die.
“He’s the loss of my life.”
part two
#f1 imagines#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 grid#max verstappen#max verstappen imagines#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen x reader#george russell
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No problem ma dear. I'm sure you're going to make the absolute freaking best our of my request. Happy to hear that you are going to make a story out of it 🥹♥️
Restoring faith
Tim Bradford x reader
Warnings/Tag: fluff, language, comfort, angst, hurt, readers ex was abusive, grumpy Tim (yes, he's a warning), not entirely proof read yet Word count: 5.933 Authors note: Hello love, thank you so much for the request! I had so much fun writing it, and again, I'm sorry for losing the original request (but, tell you what, I managed to get the request at least copied and pasted, because I hadn't closed tumblr on my laptop yesterday and it was still there (even though it was just a bug, but hey, i managed to copy the text)) Fun fact: My daughters name is gonna be Hailee one day (If I ever get a daughter). Also, I might have messed a little with the timeline (in terms of Celina appearing a little earlier) Here's the original request:
"I currently can't stop thinking about Tim Bradford so I came up with this grumpy Tim request, cause I need grumpy Tim becoming the protective sweet guy he is. Tim has a new neighbor, a single mom. Afraid that now his peace and quiet in his home will be over, he's convinced of the contrary when reader's little girl wrapped the grumpy neighbor around her little fingers.
Reader wants to start a new life away from her abusive ex and so she moved states with her daughter. Tim instantly melts when the cute little girl gets bubbly when she sees Tim.
In the meantime Tim has a suspicion why reader is a single mom, she flinches when there're loud noises or when he gets too close to her. One night she wanted to do something in her apartment and fell from the ladder hitting her head hard. Her daughter runs to Tim telling him her mommy is hurt. Reader has a bad concussion and at first doesn't recognize Tim thinking it's her ex hurting her. From that moment her secret is revealed and Tim swears to himself he's going to protect these two at all costs. Perhaps we can also see Tim nursing her back to health with her concussion 😱🙃🥹 "
Now, without further ado, enjoy!
"Hailee?"
Rolling your eyes you sat the box in your hands down. Where did she go now? "Hailee?" you repeated louder, leaving the kitchen to go look for your daughter.
Leaving the house you saw her at your car, with a stranger.
"Hailee!" you called, as you suddenly panicked, running towards her. The stranger took a step back, holding up his hands.
Stopping in front of your daughter, shielding her as you softly pushed her behind you, you looked up at the stranger.
"Can I help you?" you asked, heart racing.
Did he find you? But he was in jail - he shouldn't even know you moved states.
"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to intrude." the man returned, smiling slightly. "My name's Tim Bradford, I'm your neighbor. I saw that your daughter was alone and I just wanted to make sure she's okay."
Eyes widening, you sighed in relief.
"Sorry, I just-" you started, but cut yourself off. "I'm Y/N Y/L/N. We just moved here. Nice to meet you." He nodded, eyes wandering over the many boxes in and around your car.
"Do you need help?" he asked, motioning at the boxes. "Oh..." you made, swallowing. "Yeah, some help would be nice, thank you." He smiled, a smile that caused you to return it.
"Okay..." he mumbled, randomly picking one of the boxes and starting to walk towards the house. Picking up a box as well, you let Hailee walk in front of you, following Tim.
He stood in the entryway, looking around. "Where do these boxes go?" he wanted to know. Reading what was written on the side of the box you motioned for the living room.
He nodded, putting the box down.
His eyes wandered over the numerous kids toys already scattered on the floor, cocking a brow.
Clearing your throat awkwardly, you put your box down beside his.
"She loves these toys, she's five." you explained, licking your bottom lip. He didn't seem too convinced of a five-year-old in his neighborhood, but you wouldn't let him judge early.
Motioning outside, he walked out, picking up another box.
"Hailee, honey, would you please stay here and wait for mommy and Tim to get the boxes inside?" you asked of her, motioning at the toys. She nodded, sitting down on a blanket and grabbing a few of her barbies.
Nodding to yourself you walked outside, as Tim met you halfway, box in hand.
It took an hour for you to bring all of the boxes inside, but when you were done you sighed in relief.
"Thank you so much." you thanked Tim, handing him a beer. "I wish I could invite you for a dinner as a thanks, but my kitchen isn't ready for cooking yet, so more than takeout isn't possible for tonight."
"Oh, don't worry, me and my girlfriend are going out for dinner tonight." he responded, smiling as he sipped his beer.
His girlfriend.
Damn, you should have known that a man this handsome would be in a relationship.
Keeping a straight face, you nodded. "Well then, even better." you told him, smiling.
When he was gone you and your daughter decided what to eat. "What about chicken nuggets?" you asked, watching her, as she drew flowers.
"And fries?" Her eyes lit up, as she looked at you, hopefully. "Fries and nuggets for the lady it is, then." you told her, smiling. She cheered, eating a blueberry, before she continued drawing.
_____
It had been a month, since you and Hailee moved into the house.
The boxes had been unpacked and the house looked finished. You had seen Tim a few times, had talked to him and met his girlfriend Ashley.
She seemed nice.
Your new job had already begun, and Hailee was at the kindergarden. It seemed all good, letting you breathe more freely, since you moved states.
Tim seemed hesitant whenever Hailee was near, like he was afraid she could disturb his peace, the quietness that convinced you to move to this street.
You had just been grocery shopping, Hailee was playing with a stuffed animal you had bought for her, whilst you were unloading the car, when Tims truck parked in his driveway.
He got out, slinging his backpack over his shoulder, as he saw you. Coming over, he greeted you. "Hey." you gave back, heart pumping a little faster.
Even though he was in a relationship, that didn't mean that he wasn't handsome.
His eyes briefly wandered to Hailee, who was playing with the stuffed animal, making sounds to emphasize it. He bit his cheek, not seeming convinced that she wouldn't start shouting any second.
Clearing your throat you averted his attention back to you. "How is Ashley?" you asked, smiling. He stiffened, biting his cheek, but he tried to cover it up. "Oh, she's doing great." he lied, wearing a tight lipped smile.
Biting your lip, you nodded. You weren't bad at profiling people, but you could've still been wrong about it.
"How was work?" he wanted to know, adjusting his backpack. "Oh, it was great." you told him, nodding with a smile. "The coworkers are very nice, I think I'll stay."
He nodded, and you made a little more smalltalk, before you realized that you had groceries that needed to be cooled.
Apologizing, you said goodbye, before you and Hailee went inside. You looked back over your shoulder, seeing as he did the same. He waved goodbye, and you did the same, before closing the door.
"Mommy?" Hailee asked, sitting down on the couch as you began to unpack the paperbags. You hummed, signalling for her to continue. "Why did Tim lie to you?"
Eyes widening, you halted for a second, before you continued to pack the grocieries into the fridge.
"What makes you think that he lied?" you wanted to know, surprised about her even noticing. "He..." she paused, searching for the right words. "He seemed like he didn't like your question."
Huffing to yourself, you smiled. She clearly came after you.
"You know, honey, sometimes people don't like to talk about their private life." you told her, continuing to unpack some fruits. "If he doesn't want to talk about breaking up with his girlfriend, than that's okay."
"But mommy, you told me not to lie." she gave back, brows furrowing. "Lying is bad."
You nodded, walking over to her with a small juice box with a tiger on it. Handing her the box, you sat down beside her. "That's right." you agreed, as she took the box and opened it. "But some things are private. And maybe he's just too hurt right now, to talk about it."
Drinking the juice, she nodded. "Okay." she spoke, after putting the juice down on the coffee table. "Can I have some cookies?" Laughing, you shook your head. "No, honey, we'll cook now - cookies later."
_____
The next day was your day off. Hailee stayed at home as well, so you could spend some time with her.
You were baking, Hailee helping with the batter. Going through the list of things you needed for the batter, you noticed, that you didn't buy milk.
"Damn it." you mumbled, biting your lip. "Dam-" Hailee wanted to mimick you, but you shut her up, your hand over her mouth as you sent her a pointed look.
She grinned, causing you to shake your head, a smile on your lips, as you let go of her.
You had real luck with her. She was a calm kid, one that wasn't stubborn or petulant - only in the right ways.
Not like her father.
Contemplating where to get milk from without driving to the next store, you bit your lip.
You could go to Tim and ask him.
"Hailee, what do you say if we ask Tim for some milk?" you asked your daughter, whose eyes lit up at the mention of him. She seemed to have grown a liking to him.
"Okay." you mumbled, helping her down from the kitchen aisle. She ran forward and to the front door, before you stopped her. "Do you really want to go to Tim with your Frozen slippers?" you asked, cocking a brow.
She blushed, giggling. "Do you think he likes Elsa, too?" she wanted to know, eyes sparkling. Chuckling, you kneeled down to help her into her boots.
"I bet he loves her, just as much as you do." you told her, smiling. Giggling again, she slipped into the boots, the little lights on them flashing in multiple colors.
Opening the door, she ran foward. Luckily Tims house was next to yours, so you didn't have to worry about her running out on the street.
Picking her up, you helped her to ring the doorbell. It took a few seconds, in which you sat her down again, for Tim to open the door.
His eyes widened slightly, as he saw you. "Hi." you greeted, blushing a little. "Hey." he returned, eyes narrowing. "We're sorry to interrupt, but we wanted to bake and I forgot to buy milk." you explained, sending him a crooked smile, as you wrung your hands nervously.
"Do you happen to have some spare, that we can borrow?" His brows rose, one corner of his mouth turning upwards. "Borrow?"
Biting your lip, you chuckled. "Yeah, with the intention to buy a new one." you explained. He huffed in amusement, before he nodded. "Sure, just give me a second." he told you, before he disappeared back into the house.
A few seconds later, he returned, handing you the milk. You shrinked back, flinching, before you reminded yourself that he didn't want to cause you any harm.
His mouth slightly opened, as his arm sank down a little, brows furrowing. Taking the milk from him, you breathed in deeply, trying to cover your reaction up. "Thank you." you nodded, forcing yourself to smile. "I'm gonna go grocery shopping tomorrow, then I'll get you a new one."
He nodded as well, still a little confused from your reaction.
When he was about to say goodbye, Hailee spoke up, holding up the new stuffed animal. "This is mr. Bubbles." she told him. You hadn't noticed her bringing it along.
It was an elefant in the shape of a teacup. She had instantly loved it, after discovering it at the kids section.
Tim looked at you, like he was looking for help. Motioning at your daughter with your head, you smiled a little. He looked down at her, inspecting the toy.
"Cool." he told her, forcing himself to smile. "Looks... interesting." She giggled, not noticing his discomfort. But you did. Swallowing, your hand found her back. "Say bye to Tim." you told her. "Bye Tim!" she shouted, already running towards your front door.
Clearing your throat, you nodded at him. "See you." He nodded in return. "Yeah, see you."
Sighing on your way back, you swallowed.
He clearly wasn't fond of the idea of a child next door.
_____
When the pie and muffins were done, you sighed.
Your kitchen looked like shit.
Starting to clean up, your daughter came up to you, chewing on a muffin. "Do you think Tim would like some muffins?" she wanted to know, batting her lashes.
Licking your lip, you knew exactly what she tried to do.
But the amount of muffins you had baked, convinced you to say yes - right after her hopeful eyes.
Nodding, you started to pack some muffins into a box. "I bet he'll like a few muffins." you agreed, smiling encouragingly down at her. She jumped in excitement, waiting for you to put the muffins into the box.
"Do you want to give him the muffins?" you asked your daughter. She nodded, smiling brightly, as you handed her the box.
Humming to herself she walked to the front door, slipping into her boots, as she patiently waited for you to follow.
When you were both ready, you left the house, walking over to Tims. Ringing the doorbell, you waited for him. When he opened the door, Hailee was the first to speak.
"Hi Tim, I have muffins for you!"
His brows rose, mouth agape. Swallowing, he licked his lips, crouching down to get a better look at the box in Hailee's hands.
You were surprised that he did so, after he was so hesitant towards her before.
"We want to cheer you up!" Hailee told him, smiling brightly. Tims gaze wandered towards you, brow cocked in a silent question, but Hailee was faster than you.
"Mommy said that you broke up with your girlfriend." she explained, causing his eyes to harden. Your mouth opened, but you kept silent. "When I'm said, I ask my mommy to have some sweets. So I thought, you could use some as well, so you wouldn't be sad anymore."
He nodded slowly, biting on the inside of his lip.
God damn it. Kids and their fast mouths.
"Thank you, Hailee." he told her, smiling at her, as he took the box from her hands. Then he stood back up, gaze fixed on you. "Listen-" you started, but he cut you off. "Thanks for the muffins." he told you, before he went back inside his house, closing the door.
"Mommy?" Hailee tried to gather your attention, tugging at your sleeve as your gaze was glued to the door. "Did I do something wrong?"
Looking at your daughter, you knelt in front of her. "No, honey, you did nothing wrong." you told her, stroking her arms lovingly. "He just didn't know, that we know about him breaking up with Ashley."
Her eyes went wide. "I'm so sorry!" she apologized, eyes watering. Hugging her, you stroked her back. "Don't be, precious. It's all fine." "Is he angry with me now?" she cried, causing your heart to ache.
The last time she said these words, her father had yelled at her for letting a cup of water drop to the floor.
It was the last time she had seen him.
Sighing to yourself, you picked her up. One of the curtains moved, as you walked past them and back to your house.
Did he see Hailee cry?
Shaking your head, you stepped inside, closing the door, before setting Hailee down to remove her shoes.
"Are you angry at me?"
Your brows furrowed at her question, as you shook your head. "No!" you told her, brushing some hair out of her face. "I'm not angry at you, honey. You did nothing wrong. But, next time, I would be grateful if something like this stays between us, okay? I'm not angry, Hailee."
She looked up at you with big, round eyes, sticking out her pinky towards you. "Pinky promise?" she asked and you nodded, as your pinky curled around hers. "Pinky promise."
_____
A few days later, the box you had brought Tim sat on your porch, cleaned and emptied.
Hailee was at the kindergarden, as you came home. Your work ended earliy, so you had some spare time until you had to pick her up.
Taking the box, you wanted to open the door, as someone cleared their throat behind you. You flinched, instantly trying to shield yourself, as you turned around.
It was Tim.
Letting go of the breath you had held in, your heart hammered in your chest.
"Hi." you said out of breath, as his brows furrowed in worry. "Are you okay?" he asked, licking his bottom lip. Nodding, you adjusted your bag, as it slid down your shoulder.
"Everythings fine." you assured him, swallowing. "Just easy to startle, thats all." He nodded, before he cleared his throat. "Listen, I appreciate the muffins - I really do -, but my love life is something I'd like to keep private." he explained. "Yes, Ashley and I broke up, but thats my business, not yours."
Your cheeks reddened, growing hot.
"I'm sorry." you apologized, fumbling with the strap of your bag. "My daughter - she was just curious, she thought that you might have not been honest when I asked about Ashley. I know that its not my business, really. I just told her that you might not want to talk about it, and that she shouldn't worry about it. I didn't think much of it."
He took a deep breath and you flinched again - you just couldn't help it.
"Is really everything okay?" he asked. You knew it wasn't what he initially wanted to say. "Mhm." you made, biting your lip. He didn't seem convinced, but he didn't press further.
"Its okay, I just wanted to make clear that its my business." he spoke instead, sending you a crooked smile that was surely meant to lighten the mood a little.
Nodding, you agreed. "Yeah, I totally get that. Won't happen again." He nodded as well, a light smile gracing his lips. "Okay, thanks for the muffins again." he said, taking a few steps backwards. "They were great." With that he turned, walking to his truck.
Only then did you notice the backpack resting on his back, indicating that he was off to work. You didn't know what he worked as, but it seemed to be in shifts.
Getting inside, you breathed in deeply.
He seemed reserved, but he was nice enough.
_____
A week later, you and Hailee were at a BBQ hosted by one of your neighbors. You couldn't help but look out for Tim, waiting for him to appear.
The atmosphere was nice, the people were all friendly and open. Hailee was playing with a few kids around her age, as you were sipping some coke.
The food was almost ready and you slowly lost hope that he'd still come.
The fire crackled, heating up, as it suddenly banged, something inside it most likely having caused a reaction.
You flinched, shrinking together almost unnoticably, as you frantically looked for Hailee. Finding her, still playing chase with the other kids, you breathed a sigh of relief, slowly calming down.
But, as one of your neighbors - Jeff - pushed another - Henry -, they started to fight. Walking over to Hailee, taking her by the hand, you made sure to be out of harms way, as the men punched at each other.
When no one was able to stop them, Monica, the wife of Henry, called the police.
It took them only a few minutes, in which Henry knocked Jeff out, to arrive. When they entered the garden, you couldn't believe, who it was.
Tim.
"Mommy!" Hailee whisper-yelled. "Its Tim!" You nodded, somehow flooded with relief. He was a cop. He was one of the safest neighbors you could have.
Tim and the other officer, a young woman, took a few statements, as you others waited. When they were done, Hailee let go of your hand and before you could have stopped her, she was on her way towards Tim.
You followed her, sighing.
"Hi Tim!" she greeted him, smiling up at him. He blinked a few times in confusion, before he smiled, kneeling down in front of her. "Hey Hailee." he greeted her, before his eyes landed on you.
"Hi, sorry for that." you apologized, blushing. "I couldn't stop her. I think she's excited that you're a cop." He smiled, huffing quietly. "Don't worry." he told you, as you greeted the other officer - officer Chen.
"It was all fine, until that douchebag-" you cut yourself off, as you squinted your eyes. "Until Jeff pushed Henry." you corrected yourself, sending Hailee a warning look not to repeat what you accidentally said.
"Don't worry, we have them under control now." officer Chen told you, smiling slightly at Hailee, who seemed far more excited to see a cop, than some others would have been.
You nodded, thanking her, as Hailee started to ask Tim questions about the various things clipped to his belt. He chuckled at her curiosity, explaining what the things were.
You huffed to yourself, a little confused.
She seemed to have him wrapped around her little fingers, after all.
That would surely get interesting.
_____
A few days had passed since the BBQ, leaving you to think more and more about Seargent Bradford.
You had learned that he was a Sergeant, working for the LAPD. That explained the shifts.
You were currently trying to fix a light that bothered you for quite some time now. Sometimes, it would work, sometimes not.
Even though you were afraid of heights, you had climbed up the old ladder that you found in your basement, having your fingers crossed that it wouldn't shatter under your weight.
Hailee was sat in the living room, playing with her dolls, as you tried to reach the lightbulb. Taking a shaky breath, you stretched a little further, as you suddenly slipped.
Losing your balance you fell, your head hitting the ground rather hard. Your sight blurred, as you heard your daughter call out for you.
She seemed to panic and you wanted to tell her that you would be alright, but you couldn't, as suddenly, the lights went out.
"Tim!" Hailee called, crying as she frantically kocked on his door. "Tim!"
The door opened, revealing Tim who looked down at the little girl with worry in his eyes, it only intensifying at her tear stained face.
"Whats wrong?" he wanted to know, crouching down. "M-My mommy!" she called out, sobbing. "Its my mommy!"
As fast as he could he picked her up, running towards the open front door of her house. Cursing at himself for not bringing his weapon, he slowly inched forward and into the living room, where her mother lay unconcious.
"Fuck!" he breathed out, setting Hailee down and calling an ambulance, before he approached her mother.
"Y/N?" you heard someone call out your name, luring you back into conciousness. "Y/N!"
Your eyes slowly opened, trying to make sense of the blur you saw. "Hey, what happened?" the person who called out your name wanted to know. Its silhouette came into view and your eyes widened, as you sat up and inched backwards.
"No, no, no, no!" you breathed out, as the person followed you, before your back hit the wall. "No!" you shouted, as he wanted to grab you, shielding your face with your hands.
"Why are you here?" you wanted to know, as tears made their way out of your eyes. "You should be in jail, Robert!"
He halted, you could sense it. "What?" he said, sounding confused. "Who's Robert?" He must have been messing with you, after all you were sure it was him you were seeing.
"Go away!" you yelled, crying as your thoughts were with your daughter. "Where is Hailee?" "She's here, sitting on the couch." he told you, crouching down in front of you, as he carefully grabbed your hands, removing them from your face.
"It's me, Tim." he explained, as your view slowly got clearer. "What?" you breathed, searching his face for any indication that it wasn't Tim. But you found none.
"What happened?" you wanted to know, as you heard sirens. "Hailee came over, calling out for me." he explained, swallowing, as his gaze never left yours. "She said it's her mommy, so I grabbed her and went looking. You were unconscious. I assume you fell down the ladder?"
Looking over at the ladder, you flinched. Your head exploded.
"Don't move your head too much." he advised, as paramedics entered the room. "You might have a concussion."
The paramedics asked what happened and Tim explained, saying that you were unconscious when he found you, that you had fallen off the ladder.
They put you on a stretcher, securing your head and neck.
"Wait," you told them, eyes widening. "What about my daughter?" The paramedics looked at each other, as Tim spoke up. "We'll drive after you to the hospital." he assured you. "Okay, thank you."
He nodded, before you were brought to the ambulance.
_____
Once you were checked, the doctor, Dr. Sierra, told you the results.
"You have a concussion, miss Y/L/N." she said, reading through the papers she held in hand. Tim and Hailee were at your side, your daughter sitting on your bed.
"We made a scan to see if you have other injuries and requested the data from the hospital in Ohio, which you used to visit rather often, as I see." the doctor continiued, and you swallowed.
Your cheeks got warmer, as she closed the chart.
"There were multiple traumata, broken bones and other injuries." she explained what you already knew. Glancing at Tim she sent you a silent question, but you shook your head.
"No, he's in jail." you explained quietly, fumbling with the bedsheet. The doctor nodded, seemingly relieved.
"You can go in the morning, if your condition stays good." she explained, before she bid you goodbye.
The room grew silent, the only noise being the bedsheets you fisted rather aggressively.
You sensed that Tim had questions; he wanted to know what happened and more importantly, why you were so scared of him at first.
Sighing, you contemplated where your daughter was supposed to stay the night. She couldn't sleep at the hospital, they wouldn't allow it.
Swallowing, you looked at Tim.
"Can I ask you something?" you wanted to know quietly, brushing through your daughters hair absentmindedly. "Sure." he gave back, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.
"You don't have to say yes of course..." you started, looking away for a split second. "But, can Hailee stay at your place tonight?" You prayed he would say yes, otherwise you didn't know where else she could stay at.
He nodded, as he bit his cheek.
"Of course." he said. "Where else should she go, when she could cuddle with Kojo?" He smiled, one that made your heart flutter despite the headache that was killing you.
"Thank you, Tim." you returned sincerely, smiling back through the pain. He nodded, before he brushed over his chin, thinking about something. You patiently waited for him, as Hailee played a game on your phone.
It wasn't the best way to keep her occupied, but right now it had to do, especially if it meant she was distracted enough to not listen to you two.
"I don't know what happened back then, but maybe you want to talk to me about it tomorrow?" he offered, sincerity in his eyes. "Or whenever you feel ready."
He was right. He deserved to know.
You nodded, flinching at the pain that shot through your head at the movement. He nodded in return, before he stood. "Hailee, what do you think about ice cream and nuggets?" he wanted to know, looking down at her.
She looked at you, unsure, but you smiled at her.
"Go with Tim, honey." you told her, hugging her. "He'll look after you tonight, whilst mommy stays at the hospital. You can trust him."
She nodded, kissing your cheek and you did the same. "I love you, buttercup." you told her, causing her to smile. "I love you too, mommy."
Tim picked her up, deciding to carry her to the car, as you handed him your keys.
"She's gonna sleep when you're at the car." you whispered, and he nodded, grinning. "I know." he mouthed back, before he said goodbye.
Your daughter waved over his shoulder at you, and you waved back, smiling at her.
_____
The next morning, Tim came with Hailee to pick you up.
Your daughter was excited, jumping into your arms after not having seen you for a couple hours. You hugged her tightly, making her giggle as you tickled her.
Tim smiled, he seemed to be in a good mood.
Not grumpy anymore.
The doctor had dismissed you earlier, right before Tim and Hailee arrived.
When you left the room, walking into the waiting area, you were greeted by two officers. "Sergeant Bradford." one of them greeted him, a man that seemed around his forties.
"Nolan." Tim returned, nodding at him, before he looked at the woman beside him. "Juarez." She nodded in return, greeting him as well, before her gaze landed on you and Hailee, eyes widening.
"Oh, is this your girlfriend?" she asked curiously, but still a little hesitant. Your mouth opened, eyes widening as well.
Why was it so hard for you to respond, suddenly?
Clearing his throat, Tim looked at you, before he looked back at officer Juarez. "No, but she's a friend." he told her. "What are you doing here?"
Officer Nolan seemed hesitant, before he answered Tims question. "We have arrested a robber, but he fell, and we just wanted to make sure, that he's okay, before we bring him in."
Tim nodded, but you were sure there was more behind the story.
He motioned towards the exit, and you nodded. "Was nice to meet you." you told the officers, before you followed Tim out of the hospital and towards his truck.
When you arrived home, you weren't sure how to thank Tim for looking after Hailee, whilst you were at the hospital. Should you invite him for dinner?
Getting out of the truck, you helped Hailee to get out as well. Your head still hurt a little, but it was already better than hours ago, thanks to the painkillers they gave you at the hospital.
"I have a few days off from work, so I can help you with a few things." Tim spoke up, when you and your daughter rounded the truck and came to a stop beside him.
Mouth agape, you looked at him in shock.
"You don't need to do that." you told him, still grateful, but he shook his head. "I want to. Your concussion isn't gone after a day, and you need to rest or otherwise it could get even worse."
Biting your lip, you nodded carefully.
"Thank you, Tim" you gave back. "I really mean it." He smiled slightly, walking towards your front door and you followed him with Hailee by your side.
"You can thank me by getting well."
_____
A few days had gone by, in which Tim had helped you with a few things. He played with Hailee, so you could take a nap or a bath, or would help to cook, so you wouldn't overstrain yourself.
He was different than before.
His grumpiness was all gone, replaced by a person as sweet as the muffins you and Hailee had baked together.
You weren't sure how he got to take these days off from work, but you were grateful for it. One time he was called to the station, because of an emergency that had occurred, but he came straight back afterwards.
You had gotten to learn a few things about him during the days you had spent together, about his past and the things he had seen in his life.
Deciding to make pizza, you made the dough with him helping you, kneading it with his big and strong hands.
Hailee had fallen asleep on the couch, exhausted from playing with him. She only had fallen more for him during the last few days. She really liked him, and so did you, you had to admit.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Tim asked, looking up from the dough.
You knew what he meant, still you had a lump in your throat at the thought of it. Biting your lip, you nodded. He deserved to know, if not for saving you, then for his help during the last couple days.
"I married rather young." you began, licking your lip, as you wiped your hands on a towel. "I was dumb and naive, not having seen the obvious warning signs that came with Robert."
He nodded, as his suspicions about the name you had called him, after you hit your head, were proved true.
"He was abusive." you continued, eyes watering as you bit your lip to stop the tears that threatened to spill. "Even when I was pregnant with Hailee he didn't stop. He took drugs, drank a lot. He used me as his very own punching bag, letting out his anger on me."
You breathed in deeply, leaning against the kitchen counter, as he continued to knead the dough, still listening.
"Half a year ago, he got arrested. He sold drugs, but the cops caught him. When he was finally gone, I made sure to get the divorce through as fast as possible, before we moved here. He'll be in jail for twelve years."
His brows furrowed, as he paused.
"For selling drugs?" he asked, confused. Shaking your head, you swallowed. "Homicide." you breathed, clearing your throat as your eyes filled with tears again. "After he got arrested, they found out that he had killed someone only a few days prior. He was able to make a deal."
He sighed, nodding as it made sense now.
"That's why you flinch, when there's loud noise or when someone gets too close." he concluded, setting the dough aside, wiping his hands clean on a towel.
You nodded, looking away for a split second, before you reminded yourself that you could trust him, looking back up.
"It's something I adapted after all these years with him."
You covered the dough up, so it could rise. It felt good, talking about it with him. Tim cleaned the countertop, before he put the cloth in the sink, drying his hands.
"Now you're safe." he told you, his eyes finding yours. "I promise. I'm gonna protect you and Hailee, as long as you let me." You nodded, cheeks heating up. You already felt safer than you had during the last years, all because of his presence.
“You have some flour on your cheek.” he told you, motioning towards it. You tried to remove it, but he shook his head. “Let me.” he mumbled, his thumb softly brushing over your cheek, removing the flour.
For the first time in years, you didn’t flinch at the contact.
His thumb rested on your cheek, as his breath fanned over your face, causing your heart to race dangerously fast. Slowly, he leaned closer, your noses brushing as you did the same.
Your lips softly made contact, his slowly moving against yours. You leaned more in his direction, deepening the kiss. His lips felt perfect, like they had been made to be kissed by yours.
His hands found their way to your hips, tugging you closer, as yours rested on his muscular chest. You knew that it was muscular, because you could feel it through the shirt he wore.
He softly guided your head back with his lips, deepening the kiss even more. His tongue brushed over your lip, asking for entrance.
You gladly granted it.
The kiss was soft, not demanding. His tongue brushed yours, fingers lightly digging into your hips.
Your hands went upwards, one finding his cheek, as the other stopped at his neck.
Only when you almost suffocated, did you break the kiss. It definitely was worth it.
He brushed a few strands of hair out of your face, his gaze finding yours. "What do you say," he started, hand resting on your cheek, sending a warmth through your body, that you hadn't felt in years. "if we go out for dinner?"
You smiled up at him, having a hard time to believe the luck you had. How could someone this perfect be interested in you?
"I'd love to go out for dinner with you, Tim." you told him, causing him to smile as well, before his lips connected with yours again.
It felt like he filled you with energy through his kisses. They caused something inside you to come alive again, only tearing apart as you suddenly heard your daughter behind you.
"Ew, mommy!"
#the rookie#the rookie imagine#the rookie x reader#the rookie x u#tim bradford#tim bradford x reader#tim bradford x you#tim bradford imagine#imagine#request
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Consider this a part 2 of Can't Escape the Nightmares cuz I keep getting ideas for this story 🙃
Pairing(s): Jasper Hale x Human!Reader, platonic!Rosalie Hale x Human!Reader
Warnings: mentions of past assault, mentions of past rape, noncon themes discussed, reader is jasper's mate, platonic!rosaliexreader, human!reader, nightmares, trauma, ptsd, dark content, mention of blood, brief mention of murder/death, hurt&comfort, ft the cullen fam, yes i'd like to sign up to be protected by rosalie ✋🏼, and my depressive ass could certainly use a man like jasper lol
Words: 1253
Summary: It was hard for you to be outside. Not after what happened. And with the Cullen house surrounded by a sea of towering trees. . . It was difficult for you to even step onto the wrap around porch. Everything about the outside reminded you of that day in the woods.
They'd smelled your blood from miles away, noticing that it grew closer and closer until Rosalie was upon the doorstep with you dangling in her arms. Your eyes were open, though void of expression; merely staring at these near angelic looking family with gold hued eyes.
Your injuries were nothing major, yet your blood yanked at their olfactory senses.
And Jasper was helpless when, eyes being engulfed by jet black.
The expression in Rosalie's expression though kept him at bay.
"Get him out of here. He can't handle it." Rosalie snaps, her hold on you growing tighter.
Intently watching Jasper's every move, you see the rigidity of his frame and the back and forth sawing motion of his jaw. He must have ground his teeth to oblivion, at least that's what you thought.
Never imagining the true inner turmoil that was engulfing his every sensibility. Jasper's perpetually cold skin suddenly felt like it was on fire. A monster scratched at his mental door. A monster that wanted to taste every inch of your skin before sinking his straight, razor teeth into your delicate paper-like flesh.
"Jazz, snap out of it." Edward motions for Emmett to keep him back. His hiss is low as not to scare you further. Knowing all the horrors you had just gone through
The fog that reduced his head to a warm flush lifts enough for him to finally notice the state you were in.
Large splotches of red and rich purple are smattered across the entirety of your arms and legs, with a giant one blooming on your jaw. His stomach recoils at your lack of clothes. Connecting the visual clues together to realize what had happened and why Rosalie was dyed in a mess of different blood types that didn't belong to you.
You were already broken.
Suddenly that monster was silent, it too watching with baited breath as Rosalie carries you up the staircase and to Carlisle's office. The older blonde vampire quick and on her heels.
Jasper's monster seemed to take that moment to decide something that was against its very nature: it would protect you, guard you and keep you.
There will always be that hunger in him for your blood. But no longer would he be ruled by it.
When exhaustion finally swept over you, Jasper peeks his head into Carlisle's office. Rosalie sat on the floor in front of the couch you were asleep on.
She's in front of him in a flash, barring him entrance with a fatal snarl.
He dare not mess with this gold mama bear.
It was hard for you to be outside. Not after what happened. And with the Cullen house surrounded by a sea of towering trees. . . It was difficult for you to even step onto the wrap around porch. Everything about the outside reminded you of-
"They can't hurt you again." Edward mentions behind you as you stood in the front door, hand quaking above the doorknob.
That didn't relive the nausea in your stomach. Your eyes shut tight and Edward winces when your mind immediately goes to the day that you were assaulted.
When you catch yourself you immediately apologize and take a step back. "S-sorry. I didn't mean to-"
"No, don't apologize." He's firm on this and finally you turn around. Surprisingly, the Cullens had understood the trauma you had gone through more than you would have thought. Every one of them had gone through a horrifying event much like your own. Rosalie's was almost identical to your's and possibly the very reason why she had saved you and killed those monsters who abducted you. And has protected you since then. She reminded you of a mother hen.
When Jasper first showed interest in you, Rosalie actually became aggressive toward him; telling him that you weren't ready for such a relationship. That you needed to heal more.
Jasper never stepped over any boundaries. He never came close to it. He waited. Helped you whenever you asked for it. Approached you tentatively until you told him that he didn't have to tiptoe around you. Many months were required before this. In the meantime you allowed Rosalie (and to a smaller extent, Alice and Esme) to tend to you and repair your fragmented body.
The only time he used his power on you without your permission was when you were asleep and suffering from your all too frequent nightmares.
"If you want, I can go outside with you. Maybe we can take a short walk around the house." He softly offers when you glance back at the door.
They were all so kind to you, never asking when you'd be ready to leave their house. It never came up. In fact you had the suspicion that Rosalie would insist on you living with them from now on. An unofficial part of the Cullen family.
You knew their secret. Living there, it didn't take long to discover that they were not human. From their perfect pale skin, to their golden eyes, there was something different about them. The way Edward was able to anticipate your every needs or how even being in the same room with Jasper had your anxiety simmering down. Even Alice displayed odd signs that you would have normally passed off as some kind of mental illness when she'd stare off into the distance. You now knew it was her getting a glimpse of the future.
"Thank you, but maybe today isn't the day. . ." You force your trembling lips to quirk up into a tentative smile though it could not fool Edward who could hear the inner turmoil in your mind. He never pushed.
He nods and lets you amble back upstairs to safety. The Cullens required no sleep so their bedrooms were essentially just for decoration. Rosalie and Emmett happily gave up their room so that you could seek out privacy when you were too overstimulated to be in their company. They even bought a tv just to put in the room for you. You didn't know what you did in your life to deserve them.
But before you go to your own designated room, you stop in front of Jasper's with a tentative hand raised to knock on his door. You were always nervous when asking him to hang out with you while Rosalie was gone. You'd heard Rosalie whisper to Emmett one night about you being Jasper's 'mate'. She must have thought you were fast asleep but you heard them discuss the possibility of a relationship between you and the other blonde Hale.
It made you self conscious now when you were near him. You'd known that he was. . . attracted to you.
You jump when his bedroom door opens to reveal his figure. "H-Hi."
His smile is always so sweet and even shy. "Hello."
"Um," Your fingers twist the hem of your shirt anxiously. " well, Rosalie is gone. I was wondering if you wanted to hang out for a little bit. . . Esme bought me a new dvd. We can watch it?"
Adoring the way his eyes crinkle when his smile broadens, you take a step back to allow Jasper to exit his room and close the door behind him. "Lead the way, ma'am." Your chest squeezes when that southern drawl of his comes out.
Trusting anyone again wasn't an easy journey. But being cradled by the Cullen family was bound to heal some wounds.
And perhaps water the seed of love that had been planted in your heart by Jasper.
#reader insert#reader insert fanfiction#tw dark content#tw dark themes#twilight fandom#twilight fanfiction#the twilight saga#twilight saga#twilight#jasper hale fanfiction#jasper hale fanfic#jasper whitlock fanfiction#jasper whitlock#jasper hale#rosalie hale#rosalie cullen#jasper hale x reader#jasper cullen x reader#jasper whitlock x reader#jasper cullen fanfiction#jasper hale x fanfiction
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