#and I can go back and find it easy please
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some mildly spicy Ewan 'The Iceberg' Mitchell headcanons for your imaginative indulgence
I want 'em all to see you look good on top of me At this time at night, I need not one, not three Just your two hands on me like my life needs savin' Let 'em all know
a/n: inspired by the release of the song 2 hands. purely self-indulgent, purely fictional, and nothing more. no explicit bits, because I steer clear of those for rpfs. so on your marks, get set...
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✨️ He would be the most gentle partner during your first time together. Not rushing in the slightest as he prepares you, making sure you feel good and comfortable every step of the way, going down on you like it's his last meal on earth. He'd want to maintain eye contact, even as you fall apart underneath him. He would clean you up afterwards, and whisper sweet nothings in your ear as you fall asleep in his arms.
✨️ He is, of course, sweet and attentive and tender in bed. But the more you get to know him, the more he reveals his rougher, dominant side. You would find out that they were all right about him—while he does keep to himself a lot, Ewan is indeed secretly naughty >:)
✨️ There will be moments when he would be unsure, his eyes would flit all over the room then back to you, and you would know that he's biting back a question.
✨️ What is it, baby? — Hmm, nothing. — C'mon, Ewan. — I was wondering if... if I can take... pictures of you? — Of course, I mean... you already take a lot of pictures of me. — No, I mean... pictures. — Okay. Pictures. What...? — (he'd bury his face in your neck, as if ashamed) I want one where I can see my baby. Every single bit of my baby. — Oh.
✨️ And so that'll be the start of Ewan's most prized album in his phone. Suddenly, the lad will have a knack for photography. He'd capture all the right angles.
✨️ The boy is needy as hell. He'd actually whine in protest when he wants to do it, when he craves you, and you'd brush him off because you're busy working or you're in a rush to go to a meeting.
✨️ Baby, c'mon, just stay. — Ewan, I have to go to work. — I'm a successful actor, I can provide for you, baby. You don't ever have to work again. — Ewan, you're so ridiculous. — Okay, fine, fiiiiiine. But... just give me 10 minutes please. — I really gotta go, babe. — Alright, 5 minutes. Promise to make you scream.
✨️ He's a sucker for neck kisses. It tickles him a little when you nibble on the underside of his jaw, the crook of his neck. He could just lie there forever with his head tilted back and his fingers threaded in your hair.
✨️ But as much as he likes receving neck kisses, he likes doling them out even more. Hickeys stir a primal instinct in him, he likes seeing you covered—branded—in them. As if they prove that you're his and only his.
✨️ His favourite sight is watching you in the throes of climax. His second favourite is when you look up at him as you're on your knees, holding his gaze as you bring him closer to the edge.
✨️ Your bits and bobs would not be in places where you left them. The childhood photo of yours that you tacked onto the board above your desk — in Ewan's wallet. Your favourite piece of lace underwear — for some reason, in the hidden inner pocket of his trusty travel backpack. Your old hairtie — snug around his wrist, because he'd want to keep something of yours on him at all times (and! also useful in case you'd be in a new city together, for example, and you need 10 minutes and your hair neatly kept away from your face).
✨️ Ewan (the true blue cinephile) likes a cheeky fumble in the screen-lit darkness of the cinema. This means that you know to wear a skirt during your movie dates, to give him easy access as his hand wanders under your folded-up coat on your lap. He'd keep his head forward, watching the film as he buries his digits, but his darkened eyes give him away.
✨️ As much as he loves seeing you in nothing but your underwear and one of his metal t-shirts, wearing his clothes for long would be a challenge — the moment he catches sight of you like that, he's instantly turned on. That Metallica shirt would meet the floor. But... there would be times when he would want to have you with nothing but that on.
✨️ He wouldn't mind if you accidentally call him Aemond in the middle of it. It even spurs him on. He would also beg you to please call him my Prince or Prince Regent.
✨️ You would help him practice his lines. One thing in particular—he would want to fully act out the steamy scenes between Aemond and Alys with you, so he could carry that memory of you in his performance.
✨️ He would drive you both around in the old Ford he got from his dad as a gift for his 22nd. You like that he still uses the same car, even as his success continues to grow. And you would become quite familiar with every inch of that newly upholstered backseat.
✨️ If you ask him, he'll tell you he's keeping that car until it's nothing but rust on wheels. Every faint stain and tiny scratch on the leather a reminder of heated moments (fogged up windows, tangled limbs, sharp commands, gear shifts, riding) too precious to part with.
✨️ Not to mention, that backseat is his favourite location to do it in. And it's yours too ;)
#ewan mitchell#ewan mitchell x reader#ewan mitchell headcanons#ewan mitchell imagine#house of the dragon#hotd#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond targaryen
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Just to add on to this. Someone might've mentioned it in the tags, but I wanted to put my take on this thought.
[TLDR: me agreeing with OP and then explaining something vaguely Marxist lmao]
Do note that the power imbalance is also there. Yes, the two of them have their own views regarding the situation [Vi being accustomed to the reality of things, Caitlyn having to be shocked into experiencing it firsthand (and even then not the whole scope of this systemic issue)]—but their subjective experiences don't change the fact that, from a complete bird's eye view, the conflict of power exists.
We see this multiple times in the show. We see this already laid out for us, in several instances, in Season 1.
In what mad world will I trust someone like you? // Someone like me? You enforcers are all the same: just asshole criminals in fancy uniforms. We're here because I'm hungry. Do you know what prison food is like? No. Of course, you don't. Well, that place does look like it has bodies buried in the basement. // You don't know anything. You know what your problem is? // Please, tell me. // You expect everyone to give you what you want. What is this place? // It's where the kind of people you Topsiders don't wanna think about wind up. I know you have your reservations about me. This only works if we can learn to trust each other. // It doesn't work. It never has. You Topsiders always find a way to screw us. // I suppose Topside is to blame for all your misfortunes. // ...not all of them. // We aren't monsters, you know. We're people. Just like you. // You don't know anything about me. She makes...potions. Helps people here with...with...this. // ...shimmer. Why would you take something that does that to you? // I just...wanted to feel what it was like...to be somebody. To make other people afraid. Let's go. I think Vi would be happy to see a friendly face. // No! You...you go on ahead. She...she knew me when I was still...anyway, I don't want her to see me like this. Just tell her I'm sorry...about everything, okay? You used to live here...who's Powder? // My sister. I thought she died, but, now...I have to try and find her. // How do you know if your sister is alive or dead? // It's hard to check up on people from inside a concrete cell. // What, you don't have parents? // No! They were killed by enforcers. I knew it was a mistake trusting you! // You've been a real picnic yourself. Vi tells me I can trust you. You get a pass back Topside—that's it. ...it's beautiful. // If your people had your way, it'd be rubble and ash. // It's a misunderstanding. They think you work for Silco. // Your people hunt us! Like animals! Silco pays them to do it! // That's not possible. You're wrong. // Say that one more time. Ekko! She believes what she's saying, okay? We could beat Silco with this. // That won't solve things. // Easy for you to say! Your people aren't dying all around you! // Ekko...it's wrong what's been done to you. You'd be well within your rights to keep it. I couldn't blame you. But, if you do, the cycle of violence will never stop. This is our best shot at setting the record straight. This city needs healing—more than I ever realised.
[Whew. I actually had to rewatch several episodes just to get the dialogue IFBJKFBF]
Now, back to the topic at hand.
Let's start with the obvious. Whether explicit or implicit, all of these lines trace back to the systemic oppression being done by Piltover against the Undercity.
Vi was wary of Caitlyn in the beginning because she's an enforcer, and enforcers were the people who'd killed her parents. And it's not just that, either. Vi knew about Grayson and Vander's deal. She has witnessed both Piltie and Trencher working together to keep peace between the two cities. Yes, she'd been angry about it (reasonably so), but even then, she realised why such a thing needed to be done. She was even ready to sacrifice herself just to spare her siblings the inevitability of being the scapegoat. This implies that Vi knew there was at least a good soul out there, a sympathiser—who might yet grant her some kindness on the upside.
But then that sympathy got that very same person killed. And here, we finally know for true that good people don't survive the games of life. You don't get as far as you do in your existence without committing violence. The same also holds true for Vander: her father, who'd shifted his morals and priorities to protect his children; her father, who'd also sacrificed himself in the name of their family.
What does that show her? Being good gets you killed. Being good isn't enough.
Huck demonstrates this incredibly well. I just wanted to feel what it was like to be somebody. To make other people afraid. Prior to his reappearance in Ep6, we don't know anything about him save for the fact that he'd made deals of his own in the Undercity—but this is enough to tell us that he, like almost everyone else, is involved in some kind of illegal business. What does that say? Being good doesn't support your life. You have to tamp down the purest parts of you to be able to survive and thrive. If you're not somebody, if you're nobody, then you're worthless. You die. You're nothing. And everything you do is forgotten.
Even those in Piltover knew this. Caitlyn is a glaring example, what with the drastic shift in morals in Season 2; Cassandra is another good model (see this post of mine); Jayce had to adapt to the demands of high society, seeing and acknowledging the points made in Mel's little lessons on politics; Viktor once had to lie low in the Academy, and use subterfuge to achieve even just a fraction of his own potentials and ambitions; the list goes on.
Being good just doesn't cut it. Ekko implies this best: Vi tells me I can trust you. He's mistrustful of Caitlyn not just because she's a Topsider, not just because she's (still and admittedly) largely ignorant of the harsher realities of their cities—but because she'd've been raised on the very same ideals others she knew have also exhibited. What else does Caitlyn know but the life she lived in Piltover? What she knows as 'right' or 'wrong' is vastly different from what someone like an Undercity child would perceive as 'right' or 'wrong'—and being 'good' isn't enough, because the scales of measuring such a thing were already horridly skewed to start.
So, how does this support the idea that there's a pattern of abuse in Vi and Caitlyn's relationship?
The abuse itself starts on the political level. And this is so, because this was the basis of their relationship in the beginning. No strings attached. Get me out of this cell, and I'll give you the clues to your investigation. Lead me to this criminal, and I'll help you find your sister. I'll forget you're an enforcer for a while. I'll pretend you're not a convict yourself. We can work together. Somehow. The nature of their births had already dictated how they were to behold one another in this relationship. It will always hold a shadow over their heads. Even with the deterrent of romance mixed in, this dichotomy will persist.
OP mentions this:
Cait is Vi's only access to safety and food, she's isolated, she has to constantly prove her loyalty to Cait and renounce any ounce of lingering feelings she has towards the only family she has left, she's left in constant state of anxiety because of it.
There will always be a side to Caitlyn that would never understand how life was like for Vi, or for Ekko, or for Huck, or for Jinx, or for everyone else in the Undercity. That's not an accusation. It's just a statement of truth. Even despite the fact that Caitlyn had tried to set things right (evidenced by her efforts to convince Ekko to return the hexcrystal, and later on her talk with Cassandra to speak in favour of their case at the Council meeting), none of that matters because she herself undoes all that she worked for. All that Vi had tried making her see was for nothing.
That's where it becomes abusive. That's where their relationship, past the political layer, gets cruel on a personal level. Caitlyn, even if she didn't mean to do so and even if she doesn't realise it, had taken advantage of Vi.
You Topsiders always find a way to screw us.
Many others have said this in recent posts: it's Us versus Them.
Over the course of the first act of Season 2, we constantly see Vi in Piltover or surrounded by Piltovian individuals; which makes sense narrative-wise, but on a symbolic level also represents her isolation from all that she knew and had been built by (as a person) in her past. There's also an element of grooming present—in the same way Silco had groomed Powder into becoming Jinx. Caitlyn had slowly worn away at Vi (you can argue this as their relationship being developed, but still) and, for better or for worse (worse), trapped her into a situation where her choices leaned only in one direction and one direction only (Piltover or Zaun?).
Caitlyn abuses her power in this relationship. Whether Caitlyn herself realises this or not, whether Vi realises this or not, is irrelevant—what matters is that such a thing had happened at all. Being good fails. You can't have your cake and eat it. Caitlyn has to make the choice: her mother (Piltover), or her lover (Zaun)? Similarly, Vi does the same: her people (Zaun), or her lover (Piltover)?
You can't be good, one way or the other. It's just not enough, anymore. You have to breach something here, you have to commit an evil somewhere there—because being good gets you nowhere. Not when you're at this point of your life. Being good won't help you catch Jinx, being good won't stop the terrorist attacks from happening, being good won't bring your mother back. But being good would just make your people hate you, being good would make you a conspirator to the crimes against them, being good wouldn't sate your lover's need for vengeance.
That's where Vi and Caitlyn's relationship becomes toxic.
That's where the abuse sets in.
not to be the friend who's too woke but I genuinely feel that the only reason the fandom has such a visceral reaction to people calling Vi and Cait's situation domestic violence is because Vi is butch. yes, DV is more than just physical harm, it involves repeating patterns of abuse, all of which can be found in their relationship. Cait is Vi's only access to safety and food, she's isolated, she has to constantly prove her loyalty to Cait and renounce any ounce of lingering feelings she has towards the only family she has left, she's left in constant state of anxiety because of it.
#arcane#arcane s2#arcane league of legends#arcane analysis#caitlyn arcane#caitlyn kiramman#vi arcane
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Hiii :)
Please can i request Boothill with a Reader who is insecure about their personality so they always act emotionless/stoic around others.
true personalities
synopsis - what happens when boothill meets someone who is insecure of their personality
includes - boothill
warnings - gn!reader, fluff, slight angst, wc - 479
a/n: hi hi ^^
↪at first, boothill thought you were just the type of person who wasn't expressive and preferred to keep to yourself. something he could understand, some folks could definitely get too much and sometimes solidarity was much cozier.
↪it definitely made you an easy person to be around. in boothill's opinion, he had spent many a day traveling on his own and so he found that certain eccentrics or more expressive people could be harder to be around on some days - not that it was a bad thing or anything.
↪it would only be until he was closer with you that he'd start noticing. he could note how occasionally your facade started cracking, how small bursts of personality or emotion in general seeped through. and that made him curious.
↪quite naturally, he started assuming that you were the kind of person who only showed proper emotion to those who you trusted - something boothill would've taken in honor. but something was clearly different. it wasn't as simple as that.
↪because if that was the case, then surely by now he would've seen more of your “true” side per say. that clearly wasn't the case. and boothill wasn't particularly one to pry, but there was something about you that made him want to, as if he knew it was because of a less “pleasant” reason.
↪whether or not he found out on his own or if you ended up telling him, he'd find out eventually. upon learning that your stoicism around pretty much everyone you knew was attributed down to an insecurity of your own personality, boothill felt two things.
↪one, confusion. how could somebody hate their own personality? now he was very far from being any kind of philosopher, but your personality was what made you, you. hating your own self seemed dumb to him.
↪two, empathy. now he couldn't exactly see it from your perspective so it wasn't really empathy but boothill couldn't even begin to fathom how you ended up hating your own personality, but it was a sad thought for him.
↪in a way, when boothill adapted his new life, that could be seen as some form of hatred towards his past self. going to the very lengths of destroying his body to have it rebuilt anew.
↪but now, boothill was determined to draw that side of you back out. subtly but consistently he would try and break out small parts of your actual personality. encouraging you to actually be yourself.
↪boothill wanted to know the real you. the one that didn't wish to become robotic in a way by hiding their own personality. hiding away one of the main points that made you, you.
↪and he was determined to break you out of that shell.
taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn
#—stellaronhvnters.#x reader#x gender neutral reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x gender neutral reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr x gender neutral reader#hsr x you#hsr boothill#boothill x reader
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bloodsports
[ PART ONE ] [ PART TWO ]
18+ DARK CONTENT BELOW, MINORS AND BLANK BLOGS DNI
pairing: modern au!reiner x fem!reader word count: 13.6k warnings + tags: general yandere and obsessive themes, explicit sexual content, unhealthy relationships, misogyny, public humiliation mentions, sorta an unbalanced power dynamic, a/b/o dynamics and themes, modern & college/university au, alpha & hockey player jock reiner (will be sorta ooc but ig you can count it as his s1-3 soldier persona), omega reader, enemies to sorta friends to enemies again to lovers (but both reiner and reader are stubborn dumdums and it's sorta one-sided), bertolt x reader implications, heavy jealousy/possessive themes, heavy self-sabotage, alcohol consumption, violence & blood warning, "fated" mates, usage of suppressants, unwarranted scenting, kinda scenting kink?, pheromone-bombing, size difference, size kink, noncon kissing, all characters are 18+ synopsis: trying to get through uni should've been easy, but presenting as an omega made you become a seemingly easy target for the many disgusting alphas that roamed the campus. no matter how much suppressants you took, you unfortunately just had to grab the attention of the most notorious one out there. the university's famed center in ice hockey, reiner braun. to you, he was nothing but a godforsaken, meatheaded annoyance. a/n: i am not one of god's strongest when comes to a/b/o or the omegaverse LMFAOO LIKE I CAN'T DENY IT, SUMN ABOUT IT MAKES ME GO ABSOLUTELY FERAL AND IDC WHAT OTHERS THINK 👺👺 anywaysss, yea it's another hatefuck reiner fic that i decided recently to make a two parter LOL i made reiner a hockey player because i kinda like hockey more (i watched one game irl with my sibling and it was hella cool even tho the team we were cheering for lost 💀 the state pride was crazy, i had no idea how irritating it was hearing the other team fans cheer 😭) but i'm really really new to the sport so forgive me if i make some mistakes about it lol (i did modify it a little so it can be more dramatic and violent lol) happy valentine's day (ik this late AFFFFF LMFAO) and hope you guys enjoy this! the second part will hopefully come not too far behind, maybe in december once i'm freed from school haha note: please keep in mind of the tags above and do not proceed if triggering or uncomfortable, especially if you are a minor!! do not read my or any other writers' dark content if you are underaged. this is a fictional work and does not reflect irl morals, do not believe this is how a real romance works or functions.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚.───
"You're coming to my game, right?"
The sudden weight on the table of someone leaning upon it on the other side caused it to creak, but you didn't have to look up to know who it was. The wafting smell of warm, spiced vanilla with vague, yet noticeable earthy tones wrapped around you like a familiar heated blanket. No matter how nice it smelled, it only bubbled irritation within you. You continued writing your notes, ignoring the looming presence.
"Omega, answer and look at me." A chill ran down your spine and your head felt heavy once he spoke, the demand stern and clear. You didn't want to answer him, but your secondary gender was scratching at your brain like a persistent fly. Answer him, answer your alpha.
You stubbornly pinched your leg once to get yourself out of it before finally looking up at the man himself, narrowing your eyes at him.
"Can't. Have finals tomorrow. Also, don't ever do that shit to me or call me that."
He scoffed and rolled his eyes, already knowing he wasn't going to take that as an answer. "You weren't answering me and c'mon, it's only for a few hours babe. Who wouldn't come to their alpha's big game today?"
"Me because you're not my alpha and I'm not your babe. Go find some other omega that drools over you because this one isn't going." You grumbled as you stood up, beginning to collect your stuff to get back to your dorm. He grabbed your wrist before you got your notebook, pulling you towards him, eyes were gleaming with determination.
"Come to my game and I won't bother you anymore. I promise."
You pulled your arm out of his grasp with a frown, quickly debating in your mind. Could you trust him?
On one hand, it would be nice to not get disturbed by him anymore. But on the other, that means you have to be packed in a stadium with sweaty alphas and a handful of excitable betas and omegas for an hour or two. The smell would be awful and overwhelming, false ruts and heats would get triggered easily from the adrenaline. You didn't even like ice hockey or any sport in general, too many alphas dominated the industry.
You bit back a heavy sigh, finally deciding on your answer.
"Ugh. I'm holding you to that promise then Reiner. No randomly showing up at my dorm, no waiting for me at the end of my classes, don't have your friends try and check up on me for your behalf either. Got it?" His hazel eyes lit up immediately and he nodded, his smile wide.
"You got it babe, I'll pick you up at 6."
You were about to tell him off about the pet name but he ran off, whooping in the quiet library while slamming the doors open. A few of the students' and staffs' glares went over to you, causing you to grimace before finally picking up your notebook. What the fuck have you gotten yourself into?
Life wasn't like this before. For a year and half, you've had an alpha cling onto your every move as if you've claimed one another. It may seem like that to him but you definitely didn't want anything to do with him. All Reiner did was bring a mix of trouble to you, a burden that you never wanted. Your secondary gender was supposed to be a hidden secret for only yourself to know — the prescribed supplements made sure of that — and you were supposed to present as a beta in order to live a peaceful university life. How painfully frustrating it was to be found out from a simple error in your day-to-day routine.
You were in a rush, you're human after all, and forgot to take them before you left your dorm. It wasn't until you entered your class when a brick of strong smells bitterly hit your nose, something that never happened before. One day and that's all it took for everyone's eyes to latch onto your frame, the horrifying hunger glimmering in the darks of their pupils.
You froze, unable to move from the doorway. The vileness of their stench rang alarms in your head, they were all sour and distasteful with every short whiff you took. It was overwhelming, heavy, and nauseating. You knew what they were all thinking, internally debating whether you should run back to your dorm or transfer.
A large arm had made its way around your shoulders, pulling you closer to their body. You panicked at first until a whiff of something sweet in the air stopped you. A spiced vanilla enveloped your senses with every breath you took and like a switch, your body immediately calmed down, unintentionally leaning closer to them to continue feeling this sweet relief.
"Hey." You tilted your head up at the person who was currently holding you by the neck and felt dread quickly fill up your stomach once more.
Reiner Braun, one of the most notorious womanizers on campus and the university's proclaimed players in ice hockey.
Reiner Braun, smelling like a freshly baked pastry, slinging his arm around you while unintentionally managing to bring you back to your senses.
Reiner Braun, whose face is suddenly way too close and you could just barely feel the brush of his lips against yours.
Your face burned up at the realization and you shoved him off you, eyes wide and mouth parted open in shock as you watched him stumble back to reality. What the fuck just happened and why the fuck did he smell so good out of everyone here? He looked like he was appalled by what he did as well but recovered faster than you did, a sly smirk growing on his face.
"Hey omega, just a head's up. The next time you come to class, don't smell like a sweet treat for us alphas alright?"
You thought you couldn't burn up even more than before, your body beginning to tremble in complete rage and mortification as the students began to howl in amusement. All of your emotions were pumping through your system all at once way too quickly and you finally ran out of the class, tears brimming on the edges of your eyes. There was no way you could handle being in there for another second. The boisterous laughter faded away in your eardrums and once you got far enough from prying eyes and ears, you collapsed to the ground and nearly sobbed your heart out.
You knew attending this university would be difficult but never in your life did you think you'd be humiliated in this way, just for one stupid little mistake. To alphas, any mistake that wasn't from their pretentious clique meant your life, your downfall, everything. It becomes a weakness to exploit and use, like a deer with a broken leg completely surrounded by a pack of starving wolves.
All you could think about over and over as you finally made it to your dorm was:
Fuck Reiner Braun.
‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’
After that day, you made sure to take your supplements on time with an alarm. Regardless of that, you still felt skittish once you stepped foot in that damn class again. Not because of the possibility that the knowing glances of your classmates would come your way, but the fact that Reiner would not leave you alone ever since he embarrassed you.
When you finally went back to that class in the next lecture, you placed yourself all the way in the back corner than your usual spot, trying to hide yourself away until everyone forgot about the incident. It seemed that your humiliating moment had faded away quickly like a passing breeze since no one looked your way as the seats began to fill up one by one. It was not until you heard the familiar laugh of him, only then you started getting nervous.
You stared down in your notebook, trying to look as busy as possible but the shuffle of a heavy bag and a body sitting down next to you in the loudest way possible confirmed your worst suspicions.
"Good thing you saved a seat for me, that’s so nice of you omega." Reiner congratulated you in a false manner and you grimaced, turning your head towards him. He wasn't looking at you but he was smiling as he looked to the front of the room. You had to force yourself not to stare at his body, which was a mental battle in itself when his pheromones were as strong as ever.
He most likely exercised before coming here, a faint sweat stain on the chest of his white cut-off tank top confirming your thoughts. The tank top was hiding little to the imagination, loose enough to where you can see his sculpted muscles from the side but tight enough to where it accentuated his chest. He was manspreading — a common occurrence in those who were considered to be extremely prideful alphas — and wearing dark gray sweatpants.
You didn't mean to but your gaze slightly wandered a little more down, heart nearly stopped in your chest when you just barely spotted the faint outline of his half-hard cock against the fabric. He was... big and if that was him barely aroused, wow. You'd pray for those that let this son-of-a-bitch hit another time.
The usually dormant annoyance in your brain wanted to get down on her knees and suck him off till he got hard in her mouth, but you had to viciously fight her back into the deep crevices of your mind. You don't know why the urge was so strong, the meds you took usually gave you no sexual desires towards anyone. Maybe you need to up the dosage? You'd have to make a doctor's appointment soon because you don't know if you could stand this new disgusting pervert inside you.
It would be the coldest day in Hell if you ever let Reiner fuck you.
"I have a name, use it or fuck off." You turned back to your notebook and he chuckled in amusement.
"You got a bite now omega? Where was she the last time we spoke?"
"Maybe she would've been there if she wasn't on the verge of a breakdown. Fucking asshole." You muttered the last bit, starting to ignore him once the professor finally entered the class. Cracking your knuckles and opening your laptop to the latest powerpoint, you began writing down the important points of what was in the week's module. It took you nearly half of the three hour long lecture to notice that he didn't make any sound, no writing or keyboard clacking or any tapping from his phone. Your peripherals just barely caught the sight of him and your skin ran cold.
Reiner wasn't paying attention to the lecture. You started to practically feel the absolute intensity of his stare, burning two deep holes into the side of your face. The chair lightly squeaked as he suddenly moved closer to you, the audible sound of him sniffing at you came after.
What the fuck was his problem? You quickly inched yourself away from him, backing into the wall but he followed suit almost immediately. His large frame nearly engulfed yours, the sheer heat of his body radiating off as he neared you.
He sniffed once above your head, then again and again as if he was searching for something. Thank God you decided to shower this morning. The tense atmosphere between the two of you grew thicker with each passing second until his hazel eyes narrowed, the corner of his mouth twitched in faint irritation.
"...You don't smell like anything." Reiner sourly muttered before pulling away, giving back the needed space.
"Uh... yeah? I got back on track with my meds." What was up with him? Reiner had never once spoken to you before the incident, in the class and out of it. In this class in particular, you've usually seen him on his phone, napping, or quietly chatting with the nearest poor soul.
He's known to not fool around with your kind, back when you were still portraying yourself as a beta. Why would he? To them, betas were boring and basic. They weren't alpha enough to be considered to be one of them and not omega enough to fuck. His preferences were pretty out there in whispers and giggles too, so it's not like he would need a reason to talk to you unless it was to get his dick wet for the night. That seemed to be the plan in mind since he was continuously interacting with you.
"Why would you?" Reiner nonchalantly questioned, as if he wasn't the one of the reasons why you take such heavy supplements. Your eye twitched, your fingers tightening around your pen.
"Are you seriously asking me that?" You scowled, watching him shrug and lean back onto the chair.
"Yeah, why not? You're the first omega I've met with a scent that's not doused in cheaply made perfume, it's..." He stopped, thinking of the right words before finally settling on one. "Original."
You scrunched your nose, conflicted with what he just described. He is the talk of the campus, most if not all omegas would've loved to be marked by him; no wonder they try to court him with different concoctions. Then again, he could just be saying that to get into your pants. Original, ha! If he liked this so-called originality, he should find it in someone else.
"I'm not interested y'know, not after what you did last time."
After you said that, all the words seemed to die in his mouth. He became quiet for the rest of the lecture and you didn't have the courage to look back up to see his expression. The silence was a simmering awkwardness, and you could only try and listen to the professor as much as you could. His smell was now twisted with a dullness to it, almost bland and distasteful like the rest of the room. When the lesson finally ended, you started to zip your bag close and pull it through your arms, until his hand grabbed the strap and lifted it up onto his own shoulder.
"What do you think you're doing?" Panic bubbled in your chest as you tried to grab it back but he kept maneuvering out of your reach, a playful smile growing on his lips.
"Think of this as an apology to you omega. I'll walk you to your next class." Your heart dropped to your stomach, the last thing you needed was even more people staring at you, especially with the campus fuckboy in tow.
"You really don't have to and don't call me that." Reiner snorted as he walked down the stairs, you having no choice but to follow him.
"What else can I call you if you haven't told me your name yet?" He held the door open for you, readjusting the bags he was holding. You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms.
"Why offer to walk me to my next class when I don't even know your name?" It was a lie, of course everyone knew him just by the simple utter of his name, but he laughed at your simple comeback, genuinely laughed. It didn't sound like it did when he poked fun of you that one day, your face starting to lightly flush warm.
"Fair enough. Name's Reiner, Reiner Braun. One of the University of Marley Warriors centers." You slightly cringed at the title, he just had to add that fact in. Oh well, might as well play along just a little.
"Y/N L/N, one of the many second year students in the University of Marley."
He laughed once more and nudged you on the back with his elbow, letting you take the lead.
"You're a funny girl Y/N."
You had to ignore the way your stomach fluttered from the way he said it, picking up your pace. Remember, you had to remember that he caused you a turmoil of anguish for a near week. All you were going to give him was this moment and that's it.
"Thanks."
Now that you think back on it, how silly it was for you to think that this was the last time he was ever going to talk to you.
‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’
There wasn't a minute in your day where Reiner wasn't in your presence.
Nearly every day for roughly five or six months since you've started talking to one another, he'd manage to find you and socialize. He'd give you a small snack or drink too, ruffling your hair once you took it from his hand and sitting down in the seat next to you. Every day was a different topic that he asked, ranging from simple questions to a little more personal ones. You knew he was trying to pry whenever you didn’t say much about yourself so you've revealed only a few tidbits, nothing big. Sometimes he needed studying help and you didn't mind tutoring him about the subjects you were sorta knowledgeable in. He always seemed so interested and focused in whatever you say, so hey, at least he was a decent listener.
He started rejecting hang-outs with his friends and teammates, all to simply talk to you. It's crazy how often he did it, a few times occurring in front of you through phone calls. He'd only mentioned his teammates when he tried to invite you to numerous practices, implying that he wanted them to meet you. You turned him down about it for the first few times, creating excuses to not go, until you got tired of him asking and finally begrudgingly agreed.
Watching him practice made you realize one thing about him: Reiner loved to play dirty.
Of course since you were merely a new bystander of the sport, it might've been one of the core strategies of how to win in hockey. Yet the more you observed, the more you noticed how he treated everyone on the ice, friend or foe. He told you before that centers did a lot for their team and were known to be more on the offense, even when defending. You thought the role was perfect for him, considering how he started this whole "friendship" thing with you. However, the way he treated you was nothing compared to how he treated the sport.
It was like watching an illegal cage fight from the way he quickly sped towards the puck, viciously slamming into others to make way. A frightening sight indeed, maybe even more for the ones on the ice as they were the ones he barreled his shoulders into their chests and sides. You can't remember how many times you flinched watching an unfortunate player get rammed into the plastic barrier by Reiner, the heavy sound echoing throughout the stadium. Everyone on the opposing team was merely his punching bag and though they can get a few hits in, you could tell that they couldn't handle the constant confrontations. He didn't care that they were still his teammates and that this was merely a practice game. To lose is to lose and for an alpha, that could never be an option.
You never told him this, but you never liked the look in his eyes that he gets whenever he played, the darks of his pupils blowing out the once-warm hazel color with a carnal and exhilarated intensity within them.
Regardless of his violent attitude, Reiner genuinely worked well with his team, whomever was on his side at least. He especially got along with whoever jersey number 60 is — the only hint being that his last name is Hoover — and who was noticeably taller than anyone else on the team. The two were extremely compatible, making the smoothest passes that whenever you blinked, it would seem that the other had the puck in the first place.
The strangest part of it all was that he'd make you wear his jersey afterwards, that's also somewhat the reason why you stopped coming over to his practices besides the extreme harshness of the sport. It was way too intimate for him to be sharing a highly scented object to a friend but you've tried refusing, saying that you hated the stink and it was still wet with sweat. Reiner never really cared about what you said about it and pulled it over your head, the fabric hanging loosely mid-thigh. You hated how calm it made you feel and how every time he asked for it back, you'd hesitate.
Even if he did like you, you don't know why he was being overly friendly. Was it because you were an omega that he had to be nice to you? You tried not to think about it like that since you were slowly getting used to his presence, as if he became a part of your routine.
He never pushed anything sexual onto you either like you originally thought he was going to. Sure, he'd make a weird comment or joke here or there but it never really made you uncomfortable or escalated into something else. Your feelings towards him simmered down to a level of neutrality, not quite at peace from what he did but not as angry as before. Did he feel bad for his actions? He never really said an actual apology to you, but is that really why you still find him aggravating to be around with?
"You're such a study bug, don't you know how to have a little fun?" Reiner skimmed his fingers against the already-read pages, your bodies squished side-by-side, one of his arms wrapped loosely around your waist as the two of you read your textbook together. You don't know why or when but you started to not mind the physical contact with him anymore; you chalked it up to it being the winter months and you were cold as hell, he was basically the closest thing to a portable heater. Your physician upped the dosage of your meds as well and there was a noticeable difference, but it didn't seem to deter the thoughts you were having about Reiner. They probably would’ve faded away if not for his constant presence.
"I don't have time for fun, unlike you with your full-ride and sports." You muttered as you flipped the page, eyes skimming over the new paragraphs. He groaned and rested his head on top of yours, taking in a deep breath. You’ve noticed that he was more touchier with you compared to his other friends that you once watched from afar before, but you’ve gotten used to it for the past few months.
He was silent for a few pages until you could feel his fingers trail up against your scent gland, your body immediately freezing up. He shouldn’t be touching you there, a shiver going up your spine as you felt his fingertips rub light circles around it. You couldn’t stop him, not when your brain was currently being scrambled with the feeling.
"Your smell is still not there." He off-handily murmured, finally removing his hand from your neck and letting you collect your thoughts again.
You swallowed thickly, trying to clear your throat. "I think you forget that I take heavy suppressants."
"Why do you? Do you really not want to fuck anyone any time soon?" You cringed at his wording, meeting his eyes.
"Well yeah, pretty much. I want to focus on school, not constantly wonder if I'm going to suddenly go into heat around an alpha. And it's a guaranteed protection, I don't want to get accidentally marked this early in my life." You could feel his hand squeeze and knead at the meat of your hip, knowing that he was in thought.
"I don't know if our class remembers what sub-gender I am but you certainly do, you were literally in trance when you met me," You pointed out, feeling your skin prickle warm as you thought back on the memory. "And it was my mistake, I didn't mean to get off of them and do that to you. I'm pretty much protecting myself and others from doing something... irrational."
What he didn't know is that having no heat at all for months at a time had made you indescribably horny, but you've been managing it so well that you really didn't need any outside assistance at all. Him being the only alpha that hangs around you on a day-to-day basis and consistently touching you has not made the thoughts any better than they were before, but you forced those damn heinous ideas in the back of your mind every time. Bothersome they were and you tried to not let it get to you as much as possible.
Reiner nodded slowly, closing his eyes. "Well if you do get into a heat, I'm available for use."
You gasped, quickly jabbing your elbow into his side, causing him to flinch from the feeling and laugh almost aloud in the quiet library. "God, don't say that here!"
"It's true! There's a line-up of omegas that need help through their heats, I'm not the only one that's getting something out of it. They need a knot and I give it to them." You don't know why but hearing him admit that made you almost freeze and feel your stomach drop. Every time you're reminded of his reputation, something in you twists in an unpleasant way. It's strange. You have no reason to feel this way when you don't even like him in any romantic sense.
"I'd rather not hear about your many conquests, thank you very much." His eyes connected to yours and you tried not to pull away, trying not to feign anything that would give you up.
"Don't tell me... You're jealous, aren't you?" He teased as his grin grew wider and you scoffed, closing the textbook almost a little too hard.
"Please, as if! I'm not the one here insinuating into starting something." You huffed and tried to disconnect your body from his to put the book away but he didn't let you, his arm holding you around the crook of your back firmly.
"I never mark them, if that makes you feel better. No matter how much they beg me to, I don't. I'm pretty good at controlling myself."
You paused, the heavy stone in your stomach still dragging you down. He sounded honest about it and any omega that he marked would've bragged about it for years to come. Hell, you wouldn't even be as close as you were with him right now if that was the case. Yet, the admission didn't make you feel any better and you'd rather not praise him for something so bare minimum.
"...I really, really don't care Reiner. You can fuck anyone you want silly and it's none of my business. I'm not your mate and you're not mine." His eyes softened, looking at you so fondly that you almost wanted to take back every word you had just said.
"We could be."
Time stopped. The way he said it so nonchalantly made you feel absolutely breathless, like you were punched so deeply in the gut. You so desperately wanted to kiss him in that moment — say fuck it, why not be his mate for the rest of your lives — but that was nothing but the godforsaken omega in you talking. This wasn't some cheesy romcom movie, this was real life. Why in the world would he think there was a possibility that he’d be your mate? The two of you barely knew each other besides the light-hearted chats you’ve had together, he only liked your presence because like every other omega, you were easy.
No matter how long you stayed up at night thinking about him or how much you desired pressing your body against his at all times, you would not sacrifice your future for him. You were trying to be more than just your sub-gender and more than solely becoming an alpha’s eventual trophy wife. Being with him would only complicate things. There was nothing he could do or say would change your perspective.
As you stood up with your stuff, you told him as firmly as you were able to make it without your voice wavering.
"No, we couldn't."
It felt like it was you trying to convince yourself otherwise.
You’d do anything to not be the one watching his heart break right in front of your eyes, his mood changing almost immediately. He tried to look away from you but you saw the deep disappointment reflecting in his irises. The softness they once held hardened up once he realized what he was feeling, trying hard to swallow back the pain. The change of his smell washed over you in waves, a cold melancholy hitting the back of your throat while a burning anger bit at the pit of your stomach at the same time. It wasn't like him to be so distraught with a simple rejection, maybe you were the first one that didn't immediately fall for his charms.
Maybe, just maybe... it should've been you that had gotten rejected instead. Perhaps it would've made you feel less awful about it.
"Yeah, sorry. I… I don’t even know why I said that. Why would I even choose yo— No. Wait. Fuck, I—" Reiner cleared his throat quickly and stood up himself, ready to get out of the situation he put himself in. He was backpedaling, you knew he was, but it didn’t make you or him feel any better about the situation. He really was not used to rejection, huh?
"Let's... let's forget all that. There’s a party going on in Delta Kappa Theta tonight. If you want to come, come. I don’t want you to keep preventing yourself from having fun." The way he still cared about you first made you feel like you were the complete piece of shit here. No matter what though, you didn’t owe him a relationship or situationship or whatever you two have.
You partially nodded anyways, a squeak of an ‘okay’ barely escaping you as you watched him walk away. Every step that he took made you feel even less sure about what you just did, but it was for the best… right?
‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’
It was the first frat party you’ve ever been to and as you approached the house, you knew that it was going to be way out of your comfort zone. You wanted to go back to your safe and warm dorm, make up an excuse to go to bed early, but Reiner was right, you shouldn't be cooping yourself up for so long without any other interaction besides him. You slowly took in a deep breath, tugging at the seams of your jacket before entering the house, music blaring in your ears and bright lights hitting your eyes as soon as you opened the door.
Find Reiner, find him. Your omega begged you as you shuffled through drunk and dancing bodies, but you ignored it. Would he even want to see you after you rejected him?
Someone tapped you on the shoulder and you turned towards the person, eyes wide with shock.
"Sorry! Didn't mean to scare you," Another alpha, his clean rain-like scent faint from the amount of alcohol in the air. He was extremely tall but folded his body within himself while holding a red solo cup, and his black hair was in desperate need of a new haircut, nearly covering the tops of his eyes. The man didn't seem to present himself like an alpha, his demeanor certainly different to the ones you've met and seen before. "You smelled like my friend and the lights are way too bright so I thought you were him, so sorry again."
He looked vaguely familiar but it seemed that he recognized you first, his mouth suddenly agape. "Wait. Aren't you the girl that Reiner keeps talking about? Uh... sorry. What was your name again?"
"Y/N, nice to meet you. Reiner... mentioned me?"
He kindly smiled and nodded, holding out his hand for you to shake. "Bertolt and you have no idea. You're basically all he wants to talk about recently."
It felt like your heart skipped a beat, butterflies fluttering around in your stomach. You really had that much of an effect on him? You felt partially proud that you, a complete nobody, managed to get him head over heels for you. The other part felt horrible, you didn't mean to lead him on like that to the point where he started bringing you up to his friends. It seemed that Bertolt realized what he said was causing you to get upset, pulling you towards the kitchen.
He quickly scooped up some liquid from a punchbowl and poured it into a new cup, handing it over to you. "Here. A drink might make you feel better."
You weren't new to drinking, only having it a few times casually here and there so you took a quick sip, a smooth burn going down your throat. You coughed lightly and shook your head, hearing him chuckle. He leaned against the countertop beside you, swirling around the cup in his hand.
"Bertolt?" You hated how small you sounded, trailing your fingertips against the ridges of the plastic cup.
"Hm?" He started to take another sip out of his drink, raising it up above his head.
"I don't know if he told you this already but I rejected him this afternoon." The sound of him choking and hacking followed suit immediately after you confessed, a spew of apologies running out of your mouth as you patted his back to get it all out. He definitely didn't tell him yet.
Once he managed to finally stop clearing his throat, he wiped his mouth and turned towards you, eyes wide. "Why did you?"
You bit the inside of your cheek and took another quick sip. "I told him that I wasn't looking for a romantic relationship or sex, all I want to do is focus on is passing my classes and graduating. That's the complete and honest truth."
His friend stayed quiet for a bit until he nodded once, as if he understood your reasoning.
"That's fair, you should be able to pursue what you want to do for your life instead of tending to his needs. It's hard out there for omegas and it's great that you're doing more for yourself. I know Reiner really does actually like you, but you don't have to pursue anything with him if you don't want to. You control what you get to do."
You felt flushed from both the alcohol and his words, you've never met an alpha that shared such a considerably controversial opinion before. You quietly thanked him, watching him tilt his head up towards the ceiling, sighing softly.
"Reiner... I've known Reiner since middle school and fuck, he has his moments where he tends to be a shitty guy, even long before he presented as an alpha. He's stubborn as hell and rarely listens to us and he's occasionally a great guy to be teamed up with, but inside, I know he's just trying to figure himself out."
"What do you mean?" He flinched, beginning to sweat bullets as he nervously fidgeted next to you.
"A-ah, sorry. I don't know if I should be telling you this since you're also his friend but," His pale eyes darted side-to-side, as if he was making sure that no one was listening. "Every omega he's been with, he calls all of them 'practice' for his fated mate. Everyone knows that having a fated mate is super, super rare but since he met you, well..."
He nervously tugged at the hem of his shirt but you immediately knew what he was saying.
"No." You awkwardly started laughing, shaking your head quickly. The house immediately felt even more stuffy and overbearing, a nauseating feeling overcoming you all of a sudden. Omegas being used as practice? Were you just another practice target if the relationship didn't work out?
"N-no, he doesn't seriously think that I'm his fated mate?"
Bertolt sharply inhaled through his teeth, eyes locked to the ground. "Reiner was always hopeful he'd find his second half and you've been the only omega he speaks so positively and constantly about. He mentioned the day you guys met, how your pheromones enticed him so much that he nearly kissed you and he wanted nothing more but to have you as his mate after that. Ugh, sorry. Even saying it out loud makes me feel gross."
You felt sick, numb. Were you even friends from the start or was all of his actions just some kind of courting method? You could barely hear yourself tell Bertolt that you had to go, fumbling a goodbye and an apology to him before pushing yourself into the crowd. The sea of people felt like it was getting more impossible to navigate the more you moved in it, a tight feeling building in your chest from being overwhelmed by every little smell and sound all around you.
Get out.
Get out.
GET OUT.
When you finally managed to push through and find the front door, your blood ran cold immediately. Like a deer frozen in front of oncoming headlights, you couldn't believe what you were staring at. Every part of your body screamed in complete anguish and devastation but you couldn't move. You had no right to, but you couldn't stop your tears from rapidly falling down your cheeks.
Reiner Braun, sitting down on the couch with some stranger on his lap, tracing his hands down their back, and pulling them closer to his body.
Reiner Braun, kissing down their neck, the peaks of his canines just barely scraping against their scent gland.
Reiner Braun, basically publicly grinding himself against this willing participant of his.
His eyes opened half-lidded and in some cruel form of fate, locked onto yours. Out of everyone in the room, he managed to find yours. He pulled away from the omega, a strand of drool still connecting between them. His hand still rested comfortably on the curve of their back, his mouth uttering only one name with wide eyes.
"Y/N...?"
All you could think as you finally snapped out of it — running out of the fraternity until your lungs felt like they were being ripped to shreds — was how bad you felt for that omega. How they were only going to be reduced into something so demeaning, a dummy-run to find his perfect mate. They didn't deserve that, being wide-eyed and hopeful that because he decided to choose them for his lustful pursuits, they're finally worthy of being a candidate of his.
You sobbed aloud as you washed and scrubbed your body red once you reached your dorm, trying to erase every scent and touch he made for the past couple of months. He was nothing more but absolute filth and you fell for it like a fool, a stupid brainless omega. You thought you were better than that but no, you were just like the rest of them. Even if you were his so-called fated mate, why did he continue to seek out others? Wouldn't he have tried to abstain? Sure, you shouldn't have expected that much out of him considering that you didn't even accept his confession but for some reason, it still hurt.
Fuck Reiner Braun. You should've never forgotten that in the first place.
‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’
Now you were here, leaving the messy history of the second year behind and now moving onto your third. Always look to the future, as they say. You took a lot of preventatives in avoiding seeing Reiner, the plan nearly as extensive as your studying.
You blocked his number once he started to keep calling over and over again ever since the party, blocking the new ones that came every so often and changing your number once you couldn't take it anymore. There was no reason for you to hear his explanation, it's his business on who he decides to fuck and you shouldn't be mad about it anymore. Part of you was afraid that if you hear him explain himself, you'd run right back to him just like every other omega he had a finger wrapped around.
You stopped frequenting areas you used to hang around in, which was unfortunate since some of those places were your favorites. You moved dorms, avoided places he frequented, and made sure he wasn't in any of your classes. Your majors were luckily too different to be in the same buildings or rooms, and with the help of Bertolt, you were always one step ahead of him.
He was the one that approached you first in one of your classes together at the start of the new semester and taught you the ways in how to avoid meeting up with him. You didn't know why his best friend wanted to help you and once asked him, getting the answer that Reiner hasn't been himself recently and he was afraid that he might do something rash if he managed to find you.
"You have so much ahead of you, I’d hate to see Reiner make you throw it away."
Bertolt made sure that he wasn't seen with you whenever the two of you hung out, and when he was with him, he made sure to steer clear of your direction with a simple text. He had to bathe immediately after just in case your scent got on him, which should be nonexistent but he was afraid that if there was just the vaguest trace on him, Reiner would hound him about it. He basically became your bodyguard whenever it was possible for him to do so, and you didn't even ask. You've never felt so grateful meeting someone like him before.
He also brought up that Reiner's been playing more rougher than usual, and snapping at others even when they're on his side of the team exercises. Even the coach was too afraid to say anything about his behavior, relying on him and a few others that were friends with him to talk to him about it.
"It sounds like he's in a pre-rut." You mentioned, handing over the pickles from your sandwich over to him. He took them with an open palm and threw them into his mouth like chips.
"I hope not, his scent smells the same so far but he rarely gets into ruts for me to really know what he smells like. Plus, he never knows how to handle them well."
"Reiner doesn't choose any of the omegas he messes around with for his ruts?" Bertolt shook his head, swallowing.
"Not at all. It's weird, he may mess around with them during their heats but he never, ever lets them in when he's going through a rut. Think it has something to do with the fated mate mentality he has, but sometimes we don't even know he was ever in one until they're over, he basically disappears for a week or so."
It’s funny in a weird way. The two of you were hiding each other from behind Reiner’s back as if the two of you were dating. Even though the two of you became close, your relationship with him was nothing romantic. Some kind of bro-code would've been broken between Reiner and Bertolt if you started dating him, and you'd be eating your own words from what you've said to Reiner. Then again, you never wanted to date him and tolerated his looming, clingy presence on most days.
Bertolt told you that he liked someone but was too afraid to make any move. She was another alpha and one of his friends, so the pairing itself had its controversies. He kept saying that his confession might ruin what they had for years and he was satisfied being in her shadow. It was sad to hear him put himself in second place for her happiness. So you tried doing a little nudge for him to go for it — 'the worst she can say is no' kind of talk — because it was better for him to say something than nothing at all and still quietly pine for her. Bertolt got too excited and rushed in with the confession after one of his practices without your knowledge, a messy bouquet of roses tightly gripped in his hand.
There was a few word texts that he sent to you after the whole ordeal:
Didn't get accepted.
Heartbroken.
Bar.
You found him standing in front of your dormitory building waiting for you, awkward looks of both omegas and betas glancing at him. As you approached him, he took a few steps towards you and almost collapsed in your arms as you held them outstretched. His tears and snot quickly dampened your jacket, his body wracking out heaves of anguish. There wasn't an alpha in the world that you've seen so vulnerable before, his fists gripping your clothes tightly as he shook in sadness.
He started telling you what had happened once he somewhat composed himself, his voice weak and crackly as the two of you walked to his chosen bar. Unfortunately, she turned him down and told him that she was actually interested in some beta from Paradis Tech named Armin. You could only imagine the bouquet dropping to the floor in dramatic fashion, tears welling up in poor Bertolt's eyes. She apologized and somewhat comforted him by saying that his confession won't change anything between their friendship. That was good, at least on her side.
You started consoling him, rubbing his back in circles as he drunkenly wept on the polished wood after downing one too many tequila shots. The speed in which he drank each one was shocking to say the least, you don't think his glass touched the table since he picked it up.
"We've known each 'ther shince we were kitss." He hiccupped, head resting in-between his arms as he tearfully stared in the distance and dangled the shot cup in his fingers.
"If I shaid sumnthin 'ears ago, would she hab 'ccepted me — or or or — shill reject me because of awer shub-genda?" You pitifully stared at his crumpled form, not knowing what to really say to make him feel better about the situation. The bartender then took his glass from Bertolt and told you to take the poor guy home, shaking his head slowly as he quietly whined about getting cut off.
"C'mon big guy, let's get you back."
The walk was quiet besides the occasional sniffle and you could tell he was trying not to fall on top of you, his feet slowly dragging on the concrete. As the designated sober friend, you were carefully observing him, a hand firmly holding the sleeve of his sweatshirt. He stopped suddenly, the sounds of his sneakers squeaking.
"Y/N."
"Hm?"
You turned your attention towards him, tilting your head to the side.
"If I wazzn'tin love wif Annie, I'd be sooooo in love 'ith—"
Bertolt then jolted to the side of an alleyway before he could finish what he was saying and started throwing up. It prompted you to quickly go by his side and hold him up, patting hard on his back to get it all out. You knew what he was going to say and you hated it. He's drunk and sad, nothing that came out of him was going to be honest.
"Don't say that Bertolt." You mumbled, lifting him back up once he finished and slinging his arm over your shoulders.
"I'm not going to be a replacement for you."
He reached over with his other hand, skin cold around the nape of your neck as he pulled your face towards his. You could smell the alcohol lingering in his breath, face cringing when you saw a bit of spittle still hanging off of his lips. He started saying something even more incoherent, his eyes beginning to close in hints of slumber.
"No, no, no. I... I swer'lve ewtoo."
You laughed softly as you shook your head in amusement, pulling him forwards. He really won't remember this at all. Bertolt finally fell silent, the occasional drunken groans slipping through if you tugged him too roughly.
Maybe in another world, if you had met Bertolt before Reiner...
You made the decision to take him to your dorm. The dormitory building was way closer than the frat house he lived in, and you'd rather not lug around his heavy body another ten blocks to get there. Never in your life you had thought you'd be sneaking in a giant of an alpha into the shared beta-omega dorms, but you wouldn't be the first to do so. It's a good thing his scent was currently dulled with alcohol or you'd be in more trouble trying to hide him. Quickly unlocking your door and taking him over to your loveseat, you watched as his body slowly relaxed into the cushions.
He was simply way too tall for the seating, his legs dangled off of the side of the couch as you adjusted him to a positioning that would prevent any risk of asphyxiation if he started throwing up again. You highly doubted that he had anything left in him, but it was good to be on the safe side. You lightly pinched his cheek, getting a change of clothes and headed towards the bathroom.
You checked on him once more before going to bed, a light snore coming out of him. Seems like he's all tuckered out and okay for now, the hangover is definitely not going to be pretty in the morning. You settled yourself into your sheets and turned the lights off, soon falling asleep.
The sound of your alarm on your phone blared in your ears, arms trying to pull out from underneath the blanket to turn it off but you didn't move an inch. Groggily opening your eyes, you saw an arm wrapped around your body, your mind not registering what was going on until you heard the soft sounds of breathing on top of your head. You turned your head slowly to the couch, the connection finally being put together when you saw his body wasn't lying there.
He started to rouse from his sleep when the alarm kept sounding off, an annoyed hiss slipping through his lip as his head lifted up from yours, reaching over himself to shut it off.
"Good morning big guy." You whispered as he settled back next to you, lightly squeezing you closer to him as if you were his pillow.
Bertolt grumbled quietly. "What time is it?"
"According to my alarm, maybe 8:05 in the morning." You tried to get up to get him water and something for his headache, but he didn't budge an inch. The two of you laid with each other, basking in the morning warmth quietly.
"Sorry for getting in bed with you, I tried finding a blanket but didn't want to wake you up."
"It's fine," You hummed quietly, turning your body towards him. "You okay though?"
He opened his mouth but closed it, falling silent as he slowly began to think. He turned on his back, staring at the white ceiling.
"Not really. Everything still hurts and I'm tempted to cry even more but... I don't know. Some part of me feels... relieved? If I never told her, I'd still be stuck in a loop worrying whether I'd ruin something between us and keep having this twist in my stomach whenever I see her with someone else. I'm glad that she found someone that she's happy with but..."
Bertolt put his forearm over his eyes, letting out a soft laugh.
"But why do I still want her?" His voice cracked, a tremble following the end of his words and once more, you wrapped your arms around his torso. You could smell his sadness, a heavy and misty petrichor filling the room in waves.
"Sometimes there's things that we desperately want to have but can't have. Irrational as it is, it's in our nature." You mumbled, your hands balling up in his sweatshirt.
"Like you with Reiner?" Your blood ran cold as he said that but you merely pushed your face into his body.
"I don't know."
In the end, Reiner managed to find you and ask you to his game. You texted Bertolt, asking how was he able to get your location after being almost MIA for months. Apparently when you and him finally snuck him out of the dormitory, it completely slipped his mind that he had to wash off like usual. When he entered the frat house, Reiner greeted him but stopped midway, quickly approaching him and grabbing his shirt collar roughly.
He demanded me to tell him where you were. I'm so sorry Y/N, I couldn't stop him and our team needs the both of us playing.
You stared at the text, almost throwing your phone in frustration. You should've said no, had firmly stood behind your decision. Yet, the second his pheromones reached your nostrils, you couldn't stop yourself from agreeing, even if you were trying to look angry at him. You've noticed it had gotten stronger than before, was it because you haven't seen him in a while? You couldn't even be mad at Bertolt, you'd be terrified out of your mind too if an alpha was demanding an answer from you like that.
It's only for a few hours, you thought as you took in a slow breath. After that, he'll finally leave you alone.
‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’
Reiner picked you up earlier than usual. It was about 5:10 when you heard a knock at your door, causing you put down the lip gloss before you even could apply it. Shuffling over and peeking through the peephole, you saw him standing there in a suit and tie. He cleaned himself up, the stubble he once had when he found you was completely shaven away and his blond hair was slight slicked back with gel.
"You're early." You muttered as you opened the door, keeping it barely ajar. He's not even supposed to step foot in the dorm, nervousness crawling up your spine. His pheromones hit you like a train, practically everyone that was walking down the dorm hallway could smell him, heads turning in your room's direction.
"I wanted to see you." He grinned, pushing the door open even more — nearly knocking you over — and handing you a bouquet of morning glories, camellias, and forget-me-nots. As you were staring at the mostly red flowers, almost a complete eyesore with the addition of the light blue petals that peered out from within, he waltzed in your safe haven without your permission.
"Hey! Reiner, you can't just—!"
You groaned as you exasperatedly followed after him, placing the bouquet down on your desk. His form was absolutely massive compared to the entire room, his head constantly turning towards the different decor that you hung up on the walls.
"I've never seen your dorm on the inside before, it's cute. It's... you." He softly mumbled, your face turning warm. You grabbed his sleeve, trying to tug him out of your space so you can get ready, but he stopped in the middle of the room, his attention honed in towards the messed sheets of your bed.
"Reiner," You started, your eyes following to where he was looking at. Your heart nearly stopped in your chest when you smelled a burning anger occupy the space — a smoldering, cindering scent — nearly making you cover your nose from how horrible it was. You gulped, hand slipping out and down to your side in a fist. "Reiner, w-we... we didn't do anything."
He just stood there silently, still focused on your bed. He has every right to be angry, you were literally snuggling with his best friend this morning, but you didn't belong to him. Scummy as it was, you made your bed and laid on it, there was nothing he could change about it.
"I-I'm just going to get ready." You whispered, turning around to go back into the bathroom. Big mistake.
Large hands grabbed your wrist, dragging you around in a speed that you couldn't comprehend. You almost screamed as he threw you on the bed, Reiner following after you and trapping you beneath him, his leg in-between yours. Fear was pouring out of you in waves but he couldn't smell it, no one could.
It took him little time and effort for him to press his lips against yours, your eyes wide as you soon realized what he was doing. You tried moving your mouth away, a scared and little no slipping out but he caught you again, his hand gripping your chin and forcing your head to stay in place. You tried pulling at his suit, squirming and kicking your legs, anything to get this monster off of you, but he didn't budge, seemingly finding enjoyment in your weak attempts as he pressed himself deeper against your lips.
His knee nudged at your cunt, a muffled, surprised gasp coming out of you, letting him enter your mouth even more. A shiver ran up your spine as you felt his tongue run against yours, the wet muscle violating wherever he went in a meticulous fashion. You could barely breathe, the smell of him and the aftershave he had on was so intense that you could feel the tug of your omega side slipping through the cracks of your mind; not even your medication was able to stop you from feeling this way.
Reiner finally pulled away, a mix of each other's saliva connecting the two of you. Strands of his gelled back hair fell over his forehead, your once-brushed out hair tousled into a mess. Both of your breaths were uneven and heavy, his eyes low and dazed as he stared down at you. Tears were running down your face, ruining what you've already put on, your eyebrows scrunched together in absolute horror as you shared the same stare with him. He sniffed the air once, again and again as he neared your neck.
"Stop, stop, stop." You cried out as you pushed against his stubborn head, fearing that he would bite down on your scent gland.
He didn't make any move, only sniffing at you like a curious dog. He then pressed his lips against it, causing you to abruptly stiffen in horrid expectation.
There was no pain as he pulled away from you, your hand immediately shooting to your neck to feel for any welts or marks. Nothing. A simple kiss was all he did on it, and you couldn't help but feel appreciative that he didn't mark you.
"Don't you dare see Bertolt ever again, you understand?" He hissed into your ear, the threat echoing hollowly in your head. No way in hell were you going to listen to him, but the omega in you nodded slowly, his heavy body finally lifting off of you. You tried to ignore the imprint straining against his lower half, your eyes staring up at him in complete shock.
"Go get yourself ready."
Shakily getting up on your feet, you beelined towards the bathroom without a single word, nearly collapsing on the floor once you turned the lock. As you looked at your face in the mirror, dripping dark drops of mascara and eyeliner stained the apples of your cheeks. The lipstick that was once there, was now rubbed away, leaving nothing but your bare lips. Your hand trembled as you reached over for a makeup wipe, a quiver of a sigh coming out of you.
You wanted to throw up, get every bit of spit and slobber of his out of your system, but you couldn’t. He’d hear you.
Reiner brought one of his jersey's for you to wear once you came out of the bathroom with fresh casual makeup back on, and you could tell that the article was completely drenched in his scent. You sniffed at it gingerly as you held it in your hands, cringing away from the sweet vanilla smell.
"What? It's clean, I promise."
"Liar." You mumbled under your breath but pulled it over the shirt you wore, the fabric loose against your body. He took a quick minute to admire you in his clothing, placing his hand on your cheek and stroking the skin with his thumb. You could still see the red stain of your lipstick smeared on his lips, trying to fight back tears and a sneer.
"You look so fuckable right now," You bit the inside of your cheek as you watched the tip of his tongue licked across his bottom lip, the darks of his pupils reflecting an unhinged licentiousness that horrified you within every atom in your body. "Maybe tonight, when I win, I'll be getting another trophy."
"Don't forget our deal asshole," You finally spat out, ripping his hand off of your face in disgust. "I'm only going to your stupid game because of the promise you made this morning."
Reiner simply stared down at you, your nerves scrambling even worse than before. He finally scoffed, crossing his arms. "Right. Our deal."
You hated the fact that he basically was acting like he didn't just forcefully kiss you, your nails digging into the palm of your hand. "Can we go now?"
He checked his phone, huffing slightly. "Yeah. Don't worry, we're not that far to the stadium. Just a few traffic lights and we'll be there."
You felt all the color drain from your face. You thought it was close by in walking terms but now you had to be in a small space where it now completely smells like him? Might as well hold your breath the entire ride.
The short drive was quiet, some random old rock station was lowly playing on the radio, but the two of you didn't speak to each other. What would even be exchanged anymore? You didn't want to be associated with him so long as you walked on this planet. Reiner's fingers thrummed on the wheel, red spilling into the car and staining every surface within. He turned towards you as if he wanted to say something and you stared back, a chill running down your spine. No words were said, but you felt every little thing from his smell.
Ravenous, a voracious appetite for the predator in disguise. Right in front of him, a five-course meal just ripe for the picking. All he's doing now was waiting for you to back into an inescapable cliff, the perfect moment to finally strike.
"...You have to go." You whispered and he finally broke eye contact, staring at the traffic light above and accelerating.
"Yeah, right."
The silence once presumed until the two of you approached the stadium, him mentioning that he got you a seat near the rink so you could see the action up close. To be honest, you could care less about the game and who would win overall. Reiner handed you the ticket between his index and middle finger, but when you reached over to grab it, he took it back.
"Need a good luck kiss from you first. If this is the last time I'll get to see you, I want to make it last."
You didn't want to rile him up before he played or make him force his hand upon you in the car, so you planted a quick kiss on his cheek before grabbing the ticket from his hand simultaneously. "Okay. Done. Good luck or whatever."
You scrambled out of his car, making your way to the inside as soon as possible. The arena was louder than you thought once you stepped foot, the joyous chatter and screams echoing throughout the hallways. LED screens hanging from the ceiling flashed the words Marley Warriors vs Paradis Titans, showing the line-ups of each team member.
Reiner came first in the centers, his pose prideful and boasting with stats to match. The other three names that you noticed were Porco Galliard, Colt Grice, and Eren Kruger. You eventually saw Bertolt come up as one of the right wingers but no sign of his usual reserved side showed in his photo, he looked focused and tough more than anything else. One of the goalies was an older looking individual by the name of Zeke Jaeger, confident but not too boasting. Clips of their past games showed afterwards, showing their amazing teamwork and impressive previous goals, then moving on to the other team.
The main centers for the Paradis Titans were composed of four men; Eren Jaeger, Jean Kirschtein, Levi Ackerman, and Miche Zacharius. Was the Eren guy related to the other Jaeger on your university's team? They definitely didn't look alike in your opinion but it could simply be because of a crazy Punnett square. Some wingers and defensemen that you sorta paid attention to were Armin Arlelt, Hange Zoë, Floch Forster, and Connie Springer. The goalie on their team was a massive blond man named Erwin Smith, his photo exuding a powerful stance, maybe even more than your uni's goalie. You felt like Reiner's team might have some trouble facing them, their defense and attack seems pretty threatening.
You finally took a glance at your ticket, walking around trying to find the stairway for your seating. The smells of popcorn, melted cheese, and hotdogs filled your nose, but you didn't feel hungry at all, still sick to your stomach from what had happened earlier. Eventually you finally found where you were supposed to go, and if you thought it was loud in the other shell of the arena, finally stepping in the seating area and the rink was absolutely ear-breaking.
Sirens, music, screaming, loud announcers. Almost every unbearable sound was contained in the structure, you should've bought earplugs prior to this. Not to mention, every scent of maybe hundred alphas and omegas intertwined made you feel even more overwhelmed, a headache beginning to form.
It's only for a few hours, a few hours and you'll never see this place or him ever again.
Your seat was nearby Reiner's team, nearly in-between the other team as well, the other teammates chattering with each other. You've sorta recognized them, occasionally seen around campus and such. Heads and eyes of strangers from school nearby were somewhat turning towards you, even the team started to notice you walking up behind them. Your face burned up at the realization once you sat down. Shit. You had completely forgotten that you were wearing Reiner's heavily scented jersey, you might as well be showing off the mating mark that he could've made a few hours ago.
"Yo Braun's omega is here!" One of the team members called out and you almost hid your head in your hands in embarrassment. Oh God, don't say that.
"Y/N, you made it?" The most recognizable voice cleared your thoughts immediately, head perking back up with a wide smile.
"Bertolt!" You wanted to hug him but he recoiled back as if you were a stranger, his nose scrunching. Your face fell immediately, his gaze sinking down in shame when he noticed your crestfallen expression.
"Sorry, it's not you. It's... y'know. That." He nudged the bottom of the jersey with the end of his stick, a frown forming on your face.
"I know. He made me wear it." You frustratingly tugged at the fabric with one hand and he chuckled, ruffling the top of your head. You'd burn it on the spot if you could.
"I didn't make you wear anything babe, you've always liked wearing my clothes." The sound of his voice made you freeze in place, eyes wide as your head turned in the direction of where he was walking in. Bertolt followed suit, his hand retracting away from you as if you were suddenly a hot stove.
"I don't think I could follow up your end of our deal if you're not respecting my demands, omega." No. That was never part of the agreement. You just gave the okay so he'd get off your back about it. He genuinely couldn't be serious about not seeing Bertolt anymore, right?
"Don't be an asshole Reiner. She's not just an omega."
The blond scowled at his friend, shoving his helmet roughly against his chest. He pushed it off of him, staring the other down in a sneer. You've never seen Bertolt like this before, the usual rain smell he had was turning stormy and bitterly furious.
"Oh, I'm the asshole? I wasn't the one hiding my fucking mate from me for months and sleeping in her bed. Not to mention, what happened to Annie or did you get tired of another alpha that's better than you?" You internally winced for him, that was such a low blow. Bertolt looked stunned for a second, glancing over at you for a quick second, but he pushed his shoulder back roughly in return.
"Don't bring Annie into this Reiner, this is about my friend. Did you really think she'd let you — of all people in this school — mark her when you act like a conceited asshole? She's not your fated mate. You've proven that over and over again that she's going to be like the rest, you knotheaded fuck."
You gasped at the sudden insult, a vein nearly popping out of Reiner's forehead but he didn't say anything more, pushing past Bertolt and shouldering him roughly with a scowl. You didn't mean for them to start an argument with one another, the game hadn't even started and tensions were already high. The Paradis Titans team weren't hiding their amused stares, the Eren Jaeger guy whispering to the short haired, bowl-cut blond next to him; Armin, you think. The murmurs of strangers behind you made you feel sick, hearing the word knottease being tossed around, the horrid word directed towards you.
You started to apologize profusely once Bertolt turned towards you, but he simply held out a hand, patting your shoulder as you stopped.
"Don't be. Someone needed to say it to him, maybe this fight would finally clear his head."
"But the game Bertolt, I—" You started but he interrupted you once more.
"I don't give a shit about the game if you're the one being hurt. You matter more than hitting a puck around, okay?" If you weren't wearing Reiner's jersey, you'd hug him right now. He smiled and put his helmet on, leaning close to you to whisper something in your ear.
"By the way, don't listen to the jerks behind you. You're nothing like that, you're going to be something great." He backed away once the horn started, walking over to the entrance to the ice rink to join his team. Good luck, you wanted to say because if anything, he'll need it when he gets into the arena with a monster in tow.
‘•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’'•.¸♡ ♡¸.•’
If you thought Reiner was bad in practice, his violent playstyle was nothing compared to when he's in an actual game. How on Earth this sport was approved to play for anyone, you had no idea. All you could hear was men yelling at each other and slamming each other to snatch the slippery little puck, fans behind you hollering just as loudly.
Both Reiner and Bertolt had seemed to forgive each other on the court, winning being the only thing on their minds. Just like in practice, they didn't have to say anything to get the point across, making passes and attempted shots whenever they had the slightest of openings. The two Galliards seemed to be more communicative with one another, defending the goalie whenever they could with short barks of commands. They were good but Eren Jaeger seemed to be the rookie ace of the Titans, managing to push through and score in the most impossible scenarios.
You could tell he was aggravating them, putting them in a corner while constantly taunting them with a one-liner or a smug smile as he scored. An angry alpha was something not to mess with and putting a whole group of them against other alphas who were mocking them for their failures? It's obviously an immediate recipe for disaster.
Intermission came around, the score against the Warriors by two. As the teams were talking to one another to plan out their next attack, you watched the Zambonis slowly smooth out the ice again. You paid no attention to them and their chatter, you wouldn't have made sense of it anyways.
"Hey," You looked around for the source of the voice and finally down, seeing bright turquoise-blue and a mess of brown hair standing below you. He smelled sharply fresh, like the first bite to a mint leaf and drinking cold water afterwards. It wasn't necessarily bad like most in the arena, just made your nose crinkle a little from the suddenness of it. "Eren Jaeger."
"Oh- um... Y/N. Aren't you supposed to be talking to your team?"
He waved his hand dismissively towards your statement, crossing his arms with a smile. "Nah, there's nothing else that's new with the planning. You, however, are the talk of the arena."
Your cheeks flushed warm, the temptation of burying yourself alive later on growing more and more, but you grimaced instead. "So what? You wanted to see if I'm what they say I am?"
Eren shook his head, taking a few steps closer towards you. "I'm not talking about the knottease comments, I'm talking about the Reiner Braun's mate comments. Is it true?"
"No! Of course not!" You exclaimed in shock, but the subtle-not-so-subtle glance downwards towards your attire seemed to make him doubt you otherwise. You tried defending yourself about it without revealing much about the twisted relationship you actually have with Reiner.
"This is just because he thinks he's claimed me and we've made a deal. I have no other choice."
"Is it now? Well then," He pointed towards himself with a thumb, his grin growing even wider. "When I win, wanna go on a date with me after this?"
How many alphas were gunning for you right now?! You knew that you took your suppressants today after Bertolt left your dorm so how come this was happening to you? The absolute balls on this man, especially since he was thinking that his team had already won. You wearily shook your head, you've had your fill of pestering alphas for the rest of your schooling life.
He looked dejected for a second but perked up immediately, the buzzer of the timer echoing throughout the arena. You thought that was that and began to turn your attention towards your college's team, but then he called out a 'head's up', tossing something in your direction. You caught it in surprise, looking in the palm of your hands and finding a keyhole shaped earring.
"Keep it! For the next time we meet!" Eren waved you goodbye and jogged over to his side of the team, high-fiving and chattering with his friends before putting a helmet on. You let a small smile slip out, he may be a little cute but there was definitely no way you were ever going to see him ever again. You safely tucked it into your pocket, finally looking towards the Warriors.
He was watching you. Of course. There was a livid look in his eyes, his brows scrunched even more in irascibility and his teeth were bared, perhaps even grinding together in this current moment. You paled at the thought of them sinking into your neck like some kind of rabid animal. Reiner was barely human anymore, you realize. Any loving gaze that he had before for you was nothing more but a dangerous hunger.
All you could hope was for the Warriors to win so he would be in a decent mood to finalize the goodbyes, and you'd pray for the Titans for the brutality that they're about to endure because of his horrid attachment to you.
The players slid into the ice once more, the deafening cheers of everyone growing louder and louder as the second half of the game was beginning to start. The referee smoothly made his way between the two masses of men, Reiner staring down coldly into the clear mask of Eren. Like a coin flip, the puck was thrown highly into the midst of them, their eyes following it as it made its way down to the icy ground.
Click.
In a snap of a finger, the sound of sticks bashed together once the puck bounced off of the surface. Like a choreographed dance, the rivals whirled with one another, swinging and twisting their bodies around in order to get ahold of the very thing that might as well be the trophy itself. The intensity of the game was now at an all time high that even you started to pay more attention to it, the hairs on your arms raising in anticipation.
The puck swung back and forth like a pinball, but the Warriors managing to catch up to a tie. It was starting to become a standstill again however, taunting chants coming out from the people in the stands, jeering at the anyone that opposed their team. Players were being switched out on both teams during timeouts but few remained on the ice, a tense aura between the three.
Reiner, Bertolt, Eren.
Bertolt took a few glances at his friend, tapping the end of his stick with his and seemingly started to exchange words with him from what you could see. Who knows what it was about; the game, the enemy team, you. He only lifted his fist up, letting the other return it in a similar gesture and that seemed to calm the black-haired male's nerves.
Reiner's eyes were lasered in on Eren for the most part, gripping the handle of his stick tightly and swiping it around on the ice as if he was practicing a shot. He was truly unrecognizable, a shell of the man that once followed you around like the world's most clingiest puppy dog. You knew he wanted to show-off, his pride was at risk to a girl that he believed he owned for months. Disgusting and typical.
Eren seemed the most lax out of all of them, leaning against the plastic border as fans behind him fawned over him. He seemed not to care about Reiner's burning glares at him, waving across the rink to seemingly you. He seemed nice, but it was obvious that he had more intentions than just wanting to befriend you.
The whistle sounded and the game began once more, the men skating themselves back to the middle. You checked how much time was left on the clock, ten minutes. Ten more excruciating minutes and you were going to be finally free.
" 'Round it now!" You could hear Reiner call out to Grice as he suddenly slammed his complete weight into enemy Jaeger, their eyes meeting as the others chased after the puck. They went after it as well once he recovered from the blow, but it looked like they started talking and you managed to spot a furious glint glazing over his hazel eyes.
He suddenly threw his stick out onto the rink, ripping off his gloves and grabbing Jaeger's shirt by the collar in frightening speed. Reiner was undeniably experienced with his punches, uppercutting him from below the mask. It toppled off of his head, falling to the ground with a crack, and Eren was stunned for a second, just for a single second. He was unable to completely process what had happened before the bigger male tackled him to the cold ground, the deafening sounds of heavy bodies slamming into the ice made the arena stand still.
The referee was too afraid to intervene but blew the whistle immediately, and hundreds of people watched the Reiner Braun brutally dig his knuckles into his face. Fresh crimson spilt down on the ice in splatters and you were forced to witness him weakly trying to stop him, protecting his face as much as possible to no avail. Bertolt immediately tried pulling him off of him, shouting at him that he needed to stop but it was like he was in a trance, almost attacking him in the process.
He finally was pulled off of Eren by the goalie of Warriors — furiously throwing his own punch into his face — and the poor boy having to be quickly removed from the rink on a stretcher. Reiner was pinned to the ground by multiple individuals and given a tranquilizer, his body soon relaxing and slumping over. They put him on a stretcher as well, his hands and legs bounded together and his mouth wrapped with a cloth rag. He was still slightly conscious, his calm and woozy stare meeting your horrified one.
The game had to continue without them but you had already left, not knowing the result. You felt too nauseous from smelling the sheer fear and panic that was coming of Eren, pungent and potent as it filled the air. But Reiner's...
All you could smell was that sickening warmth, a burning sensation in your nares. The same scent from your dorm but that's not at all what made you leave immediately. The sick fuck was happy he was beating into the defenseless guy, exhilarated that his blood was running down his skin and staining the floor, joyful. The nose doesn't lie and you wonder if everyone else caught it too.
Bertolt texted you when he visited Reiner in the hospital, but you didn't respond, busy trying to scrub the remnants of him out of your dorm while tears ran down your cheeks.
He did it for you.
#tw: yandere#tw: violence#tw: noncon kissing#tw: dubcon#omegaverse#yandere#yandere attack on titan#yandere aot#yandere shingeki no kyojin#yandere reiner braun#yandere reiner#yandere x female reader#yandere male#yandere alpha#yandere x reader#yandere male x reader#yandere imagines#attack on titan imagines#shingeki no kyojin imagines#alpha reiner#reiner braun#reiner braun x reader#omega reader#omega fem reader#reader insert#fem reader
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Dreaming of You: Mouthwashing Anya x Reader
erm…this is like my first time posting on Tumblr in a while…hope you guys like it >.<
no warnings, if there’s a warning i should add, please let me know >.<
i also posted this on ao3:
please enjoy!
Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you.
It's a cool autumn night, the wind outside whistling through the trees, accompanied by the leaves dancing through the air. Usually, you'd be excited about fall, it's your favorite season of the year, no more heatwaves, no more swarms of bugs, and you love watching the orange leaves drifting gracefully on the ground. But how can you enjoy the fall when your girlfriend is away? You've grown so accustomed to spending your evenings cuddled up on the couch, sipping hot chocolate while watching the reality shows Anya insists on watching. So used to snuggle up to Anya, her warmth helping you bear through the chilly nights. So used to dozing off in minutes, your eyelids growing heavier with each gentle strokes of her fingers on your hair. But now, without her, you find falling asleep a lot harder, a lot lonelier, and you find yourself trapped with your own gloom.
And I wish on a star, that somewhere you are, thinking of me too.
You gaze out your window, and look up at the sky. It's not easy to see the stars with the city lights, but some manage to shine through. You wonder which one Anya is near, wonder if she's eating well, wonder if she's studying the nursing books the same way she does here. But most importantly, you wonder if the time is weighing on her as much as it is on you. Does her heart ache the same way as yours? It's not her first trip, but you can never grow accustomed to the months without her, without hearing her voice, without her kisses, without her embraces. It never gets easier, and each trips feels harder than the last. You chuckle to yourself, realizing that Anya left you like a spoiled child, leaving you accustomed to her kisses and affection, leaving you wanting more and more, but now that she's away, you're left alone feeling bitter. All that's left for you is to throw a tantrum.
You sigh, pulling the blanket closer to your chin, drawing your knees to your chest, trying to block out the emptiness that fills the room. The wind outside continues to whistle, the trees' rustling almost soothing. Your eyes flutter shut, heavy from the weight of longing, and before you know it, the familiar warmth of Anya's embrace seems to envelop you.
You're on the couch again, just like every other night, the TV softly playing in the background as you lean against her. Her fingers are stroking gently through your hair, and you sigh, your body easing with every stroke. You feel safe, warm, at peace. You're watching the same reality show, and Anya is watching intently like she always does, her eyes glued to the screen. She's here. She's not on that damn spaceship millions of miles away. She's here with you.
But then you open your eyes... and the room is empty. The cold air rushes in, and the only sound is the rustling of the leaves outside.
You blink, the world around you slipping in and out of focus, the line between dream and reality blurring as you begin to wake up. The stars outside the window seem closer now, brighter, and you wonder if Anya is looking at the same ones. You imagine her voice, soft and familiar, calling your name. It was a dream, you know it was, but it felt so real—her presence, her warmth, her touch. The ache of missing her is sharp, but in this moment, it's comforting, like a memory you don't want to let go of.
And a small, steady hope rises in your chest.
She'll be back soon.
You whisper the words to yourself, it's a quiet promise, a soft reassurance. It's not the same as holding her in your arms, but it's something to hold onto—a reminder that the distance between you is only temporary. You know that when she does come back, things will feel right again, like they always do. And though you may have to bear the loneliness for a little while longer, it won't last forever.
You close your eyes again, letting the thought of her warmth fill you, pulling the blanket tighter around you. For now, it's enough. Just knowing she'll be back soon.
And when she does, the autumn nights will feel like home again.
Cause I'm dreaming of you tonight.
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Mine friendo, one, I dunno why it reblogged three times and I do not take any of that back, and two, I need your take on a Nikto kitter cause I wanna, with permission, write a piece with your au 🙏 if it's okay
Okay so, I had to wait until I got home for this but PLEASE IT'S OKAY TO WRITE FOR THIS OH MY GOSH PLEASE DO. All I ask is a tag as credit please. I mean, it's not really my au, it's just appreciated. It's not necessary. What is necessary is tagging me so I can read it! I want to read this!!!
TW: mentions of torture, violence, recovering from grievous wounds
However, your other part of your ask might lead to a bit of a tragedy. See, when Kortac created their task force of cat hybrids, they were trying to use the parts of cats that make perfect hunters to make their soldiers. Silent, fast, agile, strong, excellent eyesight under low light conditions, enhanced smell and hearing, capable of mimicry, able to endure hot and cold environments. Above all, they were to be loyal. So, they used the domestic cat to keep their soldiers domesticated enough to keep them under their thumb.
Nikto was among the first used. He was the first successful prototype. He was perfect! He was loved for his skills as a soldier, and he was loved as being an affectionate domesticated cat. Nikto was adored.
Unfortunately, KorTac had funding cuts and all the perfect soldiers they made had two choices: be let free, or be euthanized. The head of the lab was a soft-hearted man, and he insisted that the cats were to be set free. When the order went through that the cats were to be euthanized regardless, he panicked and smuggled the cats out to a city where he let them free. He begged them to forgive him as he let them go.
The cats all gathered together to face the harshness of city life. Not all of them made it, but most managed. They were homeless cats, homeless humans. They were lost and scared, but they persevered.
Eventually, some of the cats started to get adopted. Nikto watched as his brothers and sisters in arms managed to find places to stay and hide in their cat forms. He saw how wonderfully things worked out for them. Surely, he could find a happy home too, right?
So Nikto let himself be adopted by someone. He was picked up by a teenager with his friend and brought back to a shed. There, Nikto was forced to endure the worst of human behaviour.
The teens learned of a way to make money online. A strange way, but an easy way. It made good money, so they heard. It was easy, as long as you could do it.
Nikto was tortured for hours and hours in that shed. Being a stray for so long, he was too hungry and weak to be able to shift and defend himself. Instead, he was forced to endure horrors I hate to repeat.
When the teens figured that Nikto was dead, they put him in a can and kicked it over into a puddle of some leftover household acid, remains of what they'd used on him previous. Too weak to move, Nikto accepted his fate and closed his eyes.
He was woken up later by an animal trying to nibble at him. Parts of his body fell off as he heaved himself out of the puddle. He felt himself shake, he thought this was the end. But, he needed to warn the others. He couldn't let them suffer a fate like this.
Nikto hauled himself through the streets. He pushed through back alleys to get back to the city, and back to where his squad mates lived. When he arrived back, they did their best to care for him, but they didn't think Nikto would make it through the night.
But he did.
Nikto lived the next day, and then the next day, then the next and then the next day. Every day he lived was a miracle. Hutch, Roze and Askel poured their heart and souls into Nikto, and too their amazement, Nikto began to recover.
His skin started to grow back, his eyes fluttered open. His breathign relaxed, he started to talk.
And talk he did! He told them all about the humans. He warned them all. He made them all swear to protect themselves, to never let themselves fall into the wrong hands again. He made them swear to be strong, to always be healthy enough to shift into human forms. They promised, and they followed his word.
To this day, Nikto feels his heart drop when he hears someone has been adopted. He's made an initiative where each time one of their kin are adopted, another will follow them home to ensure they go to a safe home. They always make sure.
Nikto is still afraid of humans. It doesn't help that nobody really wants to adopt a cat like him... He's covered in scars now, scars that transfer to his human form. Despite how horrible he looks in his cat form, he'll stay in that form to avoid showing his human face. He's never forgotten the fear he felt when he saw his own eye staring back at him from within a fleshy socket, surrounded by redness and folds of scar tissue. He won't ever let anyone see his human face again, he swears by this.
Sometimes, someone will be foolish enough to ask Nikto if he'd consider trying to get adopted again. Nikto never says anything. He never has to. The way the whole room goes silent speaks volumes.
When he leaves them to stew in their own pity and misery, he'll think about what they said. He'll consider their words. A part of him wants to be adopted. He wants a warm, happy home. One like back at KorTac. He's been told KorTac was horrible, but when he was in the cage he had a roof over his head and three meals a day. He didn't go hungry, he didn't shiver at night. He was always safe.
Nikto, despite it all, still wants a home. Is he ready yet to find a human to trust? He doesn't know. He doesn't think he'll ever be ready, but he reminds himself that nobody is ever ready for change. It just happens. One day, a human will find him and love him for who he is, he holds onto that hope dearly.
Here's a quick ref of Nikto for you guys at home. Sadly, he can't really wear a mask in cat form, but at least he has a mask in human form. Still, despite how rough he looks, he still prefers living as a scarred cat than having to face his human form in the mirror again.
Oh, and as for the video? The one those teens made to make hundreds of thousands of dollars? The one that would make them filthy rich?
It made $97 USD.
#nikto#cod nikto#call of duty nikto#nikto x reader#mwii nikto#nikto call of duty#nikto cod#nikto x you#nikto fanart#ask#ask me anything#writing#requests#reqs open#request#cod request#fanfiction#codf anfiction#cod x reader#cod fanfiction#call of duty#cod mw2#cod#cod mwii#modern warfare#gremlin speaks#horangi#horangi cod#kim horangi hong jin#kim horangi hong jin cod
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What’s something that helped you get through a tough time?
Hello!
It's a good time for me to answer this hahaha xD
Some of the things I talk about here could be a little disturbing (or not?) so I'll put it under a cut. Anyone who might feel uncomfortable, please skip this post.
I don't know if I have "something" in specific, really, when I look back on some of the worst times I've experienced... it was more like there were a bunch of disordered things that helped me pull through. Many weren't even healthy; sometimes I could get out of bed and do something nice, other times I just lay there and binged Terrace House seasons without drinking water cuz I couldn't find the energy to move. That was, without doubt one of the worst things I did (the dehydration was baaaaaaaaaad hahaha, don't recommend xD) but it also made me think "woah man... I'm just gonna stay like this?"
I mean, it wasn't everything, but it was one of the first thoughts in a series that helped me move.
See, I think belief matters. I'm 28. Assuming I'm going to live a normal lifespan, I'm not even half of my way through. Things were really bad a few years ago. Nothing was good, I was spending whole weeks in a fog, and I had very little belief that things could ever get better.
But I held on to that sliver of belief and things today are definitely much better.
I'm not any closer to seeing the aurora with my own eyes or the other things I've always wanted to do. But hey, I'm 28 today, in a few more years I'll be in my 30s - what if things are even better? I'll admit that some days even now, this thought feels stupid and sour and I get dangerously close to going back to square one. Things aren't easy still, but I know that belief is a very very strong thing, even in the smallest dose. I do have it. Once it seemed impossible.
When things get better (and please trust me, they always do), it's not really in huge ways. It can just be the tiniest difference between yesterday and today. Yesterday I couldn't get out of bed, but today I did. Tomorrow I might actually sleep at night too. These changes aren't consistent either, but they ARE there and it's important to notice them. It helps to see that they exist, they're all the small hands helping you out of the tough time.
Keep your belief in the future, no matter HOW bad things are. Keep it.
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Troublemaker!reader tries to be a good influence for them
[ PLATONIC HEADCANONS ] [ Kotoko, Monaca, Masuru, Jataro & Nagisa ]
[ Danganronpa Ultra Despair Girls ]
Its been so loooong since last time i wrote for my babies that i didn't even remembered how to do it properly! But but but I did try my best in this one and actually have fun while thinking about it
I hope you enjoy it as much as I did my dear reader <3
For all of you is more likely to be an accident or simply a coincidence, crossing paths when you were about to do something, even so it would take a while for them to warm you because of how much they dislike grown ups!
For being an ultimate the sistem of the school is way too permissive so that would lead you to have enough free time to just end up messing around the other parts of the school, including the section of the little ultimates, then again they may be a little wary at first specially if you have come simply to cause problems but the friendship would grow with some patience
Monaca is one of the first ones to warm up, she easily become the leader of the group of friends and she can easily see how of a troublemaker you are, not really caring about the school, and thats the main reason why she grows to like you so quick! Your rebelious and carefree attitude is what make her grow to like you in a second and why she decided to follow your example, she was already wishing to cause troubles and maybe even take advantage of those who she hates but now you are finally helping her take that last step so of course she would start following you around
The second to grow to not only like you a lot but also to admire you is Masuru! He is already energetic and loves playing around but getting to know someone who just wants to have fun even if that means causing troubles to others is something incredibly cool in his childish mind, so of course he would start following you around and ask to let him play with you!
Kotoko would take even longer to warm up but is thanks to Monaca that she does, she just doesn't like grown ups (and if you male it would be even more dificult) but it is until she notice how with you is just pure fun and without anything to do with her directly she would simply give a try and will end up asking for more games! She would even end up having a rivality with Masuru, both trying to show of they are the best and the one who can follow your rythm with ease
It would be too dificult Nagisa to be comfortable with you, he is too mature for his age and is too dedicated at his studies to waste his time in such childish and stupid things, but at the end is the rest who end up making him just relax and play around (probably being teased a lot by Masuru and Kotoko simply get on his nerves and thats why he end up giving up)
While for Jataro is surprisingly easy to warm up, it may take time because he just see himself as a horrendous monster and a burden but soon will find the same joy on simply going around and having fun while causing troubles, at the start he would feel like is not a good thing to do but with some reasurance and when he grows comfortable around you he will simply start doing what he wants and may even become as caotic as you can be
It could be quite the surprised when one day you look back and then notice a bunch of kids suddenly following your steps, calling you admirable and funny and wanting to follow your example, it could be then the moment you realice this new responsability because despite being considere ultimates they are still kids, and kids follow the example of whoever they admire so maybe following a total troublemaker who gets away for what they do thanks to being an ultimate isn't exactly the best example for their childish minds
Wanting to give them a good example could be understandable but quite dificult to do when you are used to do what you want to do as you please, and since they are already used to seeing you being caotic it could be a little hypocrite to tell them to behaive, so it would be quite dificult to now try to give a good example
It may end up being a learning experience for all, by you trying to change at least enough to don't raise a bunch of brats and them to have someone who cares for them. There is probably moments where you have to stop yourself for a moment to think twice before doing something, even asking them if they know how to solve a problem in a pacific way
However, when you suddenly try to stop yourself from doing something reckless and try to teach them to not be so caotic it isn't going to be well received for them, suddenly they would be accusing you to act like those boring adults they hate so much and will try to push you to go back to be the troublemaker they know and like so much
At the end it would be easier to show them important things you know without stop being you, otherwise it would just feel unatural, besides, teaching them things as the troublemaker you are would not only make them happy but also will make them actually want to grow as a person, and since they are still kids honestly they still have their whole life awaiting for them to grow and learn, so for now some fun wouldn't hurt, right?
It may not go the best way posible and end up being all a caotic fun but at least all grow a little, including you
#danganronpa ultra despair girls#danganronpa x reader#warriors of hope#warriors of hope x reader#monaca towa#monaca towa x reader#monaca x reader#masuru daimon#masuru daimon x reader#masuru x reader#kotoko utsugi#kotoko utsugui x reader#kotoko x reader#nagisa shingetsu#nagisa shingetsu x reader#nagisa x reader#jataro kemuri#jataro kemuri x reader#jataro x reader#x reader#x gn reader#video game x reader
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I love when someone asks me for a rec and I can unfurl the manuscripts lol
#I don’t read a ton of fic anymore#but I’d like to start again#and leave comments as well bc I know how awesome it is to get comments#but I used to have a google sheet with notes about the fics I read so I could find them later#like obviously. bookmark your fics#do that#because this might be weird but I also adore reading the bookmarks that people leave#but the sheet is for more specific keywords or tags the author might not have used#so I can go back and say ‘what was that one fic#where Apollo thinks Miles and Phoenix are married’#and I can go back and find it easy please
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6/14 • Day 6 • Meet the Heroes
Princess Training?
Decided to clean up this sketch! I wasn't entirely satisfied w it when I drew it, but eh... it's all I have LMFAOOO 🧍
Some additional sketches! First one I was testing out/playing w casual outfits, second one I just really wanted to draw the active wear so I went w that LMFAO
Also made slight changes to Céline's active wear palette, cause like.... they did her so dirty........
Like even the canonish one doesn't follow canon, they just picked the worst palest yellow for her 😔
@sharenaweek
#sharenaweek2024#i'm p tired still tbh! i think i'm gonna take it easy now#but i love celine w all my heart and i want her to interact w sharena sooooooooo bad.#LIKE. using hortensia's fbs as a blueprint. i think she and sharena would ABSOLUTELY have something there#not to replace hortensia about it i love her too. poor girl would be seething though if she found out 😭#but then you can just keep going. celine loves cute girls. she wants to be a 'big sister' so bad#sharena famously loves collecting cute girls. when hortensia sees shari as a threat it's too late#sharena became her friend like yesterday. record time. she can't keep getting away w this.#but most of all i desperately want to see celine be an autistic little weirdo about sharena LMFAOO#LIKE.... CELINE IS SO AUTISTIC TO ME ....... she's SO silly about it. in such a serious 'mature for her age' way#i want to see them both fumble through a friendship soooo bad. both of them trying to find the correct Script/Act#to successfully Befriend the other.#i think they would be sooooo fun. alfred. please. i'm begging you to introduce them.#sharena#fe celine#my art#'hortensia's fbs' i meant to say supports. her supports w celine LMFAOOO#well. i'm not going back to fix that LMFAOOO
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If Finrod is Legolas's other dad, explain Lorien.
Reference is to this post, and also I'm tagging @z-h-i-e because this is their ship-baby, I just popped in to sprinkle some additional inspiration because my brain went "ooh hey!" when their post crossed my dash because that's the kind of supportive community fandom is supposed to be made of fyi.
Right, so. There's no sense of tone in straight-text communication on the internet, so I know that it's entirely possible that this ask was sent in the spirit of giggling-with-popcorn delight while you eagerly await the resulting explanation. It's equally possible that you're playing at being The Ship Police and challenging me in the expectation that I won't be able to make this Just For Funsies ship sail without floundering on the rocks of canon.
Either way: buckle up. Because the boats of Lórien don't sink.
Because when Legolas gets to the woods of Lothlórien with the rest of the Fellowship, he's delighted. He's never actually been here before! He's heard all the stories, and listened avidly, but. well. Thranduil and Galadriel both blame the other a little bit for the nasty way Finrod died (they know it's not the other's fault so they don't say anything, either to each other or anyone else but, well. it feels like it ought to be the other one's fault, somehow).
And there's all that tension re: Doriath still, and why Galadriel couldn't just pick-up where Melian her teacher left off and maintain the Girdle afterwards—because I'm not a maia, Thranduil, you ass! Oh, so you couldn't even TRY?—especially because she then proceeds to do basically that for Lórien just a few thousand years later...and of course Galadriel thinks it's Oropher's fault that so many of Lothlórien's elves died in the Last Alliance, because if only he hadn't been so reckless and pig-headed then surely Amdír would never have thought up that idiotic suicidal charge on his own...and if she'd maybe tried a little harder to rein-in the son/nephew of the Kinslayers, maybe Sauron would never have even made the Rings, and Mirkwood would still be Greenwood, which you'll note she can't be arsed to extend her convenient semi-girdle to either...and if he wasn't so damn prideful maybe somebody could help his precious stupid spider-forest...etc etc.
They aren't like. enemies. but they don't really get along anymore, either. They don't talk. (There's a reason the elves of Green/Mirkwood were moving north even before Sauron took up housekeeping in Dol Guldur.) So even though Lothlórien is like maybe a week's walk away, Legolas hasn't actually been here before. And he is stoked! Because he's always wanted to visit, but he didn't want to hurt his remaining dad's feelings by being like "bye, gonna go visit my aunt whom you haven't spoken to in like three thousand years, nbd!" so he never did — but here they are now, and it's part of the Quest, so it's not like Legolas just popped in for a visit, is it? He's doing something that just happened to bring him here, so Thranduil can't take it personally, and...well, here he is! At last! This is awesome! He's so excited to see his aunt's fabled forest!
And then they want to blindfold him!? He's FINALLY in Lórien, and he's not even allowed to look at the place!? This is his aunt's forest, for fuck's sake — he is an elf and a kinsman here, dammit! No wonder he goes from zero-to-sixty re: "golly Gimli don't be so stubborn" => "hOw dARe yOu!?!?!?" when the blindfold is suggested. He's not just pissed, he's taking it personally. Because he's family.
Okay so far so good, but when the Fellowship comes before Celeborn and Galadriel why doesn't anyone say anything about Legolas literally being their nephew, one might ask? Ah! Well, that's because we have Hobbits for our narrators, and they simply don't know elvish family trees well enough to catch that detail. Which is why when Celeborn says "Welcome son of Thranduil! Too seldom do my kindred journey hither from the North," it's perhaps a little more pointed of a statement than the Hobbits know. Celeborn is saying long time no see nephew, how nice of you to visit FINALLY. But Legolas and Thranduil have called themselves "Wood-elves" since moving to Greenwood, so the fact that he's actually half-Noldor just never gets mentioned, because it's not like it's relevant, is it? He doesn't mention being half-Sindar either. He calls himself a Wood-elf because he is a Wood-elf...by adoption. So why would the Hobbits even think to ask?
And we know that Galadriel uses ósanwë on everybody, so why wouldn't she be using it with her own nephew? What better way to have a private family chat, after all? And she doesn't say anything aloud to anyone while Celeborn is greeting everybody else, and it's not like Galadriel really needs to listen to the "hellos" either; perhaps she and Legolas have a little mental confab just the two of them while everybody else is settling in. You could easily write that in, if you wanted to, without breaking any of the existing canon.
After that, we actually have a perfect textural opening for Legolas to go hang with his aunt and uncle some more: while the rest of the Fellowship doesn't see Galadriel and Celeborn again until the Mirror and then their departure, the book says "Legolas was away much among the Galadhrim, and after the first night he did not sleep with the other companions, though he returned to eat and talk with them." So we know that Legolas is going off to hang-out with the Lórien elves...a.k.a. Aunt Galadriel. Probably sleeping in the guest bedroom and pestering her for embarrassing stories about his dads. And maybe asking her for tips on how to talk to dwarves without putting your foot in your mouth since she's clearly got experience.
And no, none of them went in for stuff like gushing hugs when they meet...but if they haven't spoken to one another in a few thousand years, and probably didn't spend all that much time together even before that (Galadriel and Thranduil weren't much in any of the same places after Doriath fell) then they wouldn't likely be all that cuddly with one another anyway, would they? Distant-but-fond seems like the order of the day to me, and you can definitely read their fleeting interactions in the book that way. (A kickass bow potentially strung with your own hair is a great gift for a nephew you don't know well who's about to go off into danger! I bet he could even shoot-down a Ringwraith with a bow like that!) Tense-and-awkward-but-trying-to-be-polite would work too, of course; depends on what kind of drama you want.
So yeah, actually I think it's perfectly reasonable to posit that Galadriel could potentially be Legolas's aunt; I've seen several fics that present Celeborn and Thranduil as cousins or some other close relative, and nobody gets shirty about the canocity of that kinship re: the Lórien scenes, so why wouldn't the connection be just as acceptable to come via Finrod and Galadriel instead? There's nothing in the text that I know of that says it can't be canon.
Anyway, Finrod-as-Legolas's-other-dad wasn't actually meant to be a serious "look how well canon supports this idea, it's definitely a very plausible thing that people should embrace in a wholly serious and canonical manner" theory to begin with. I was just having fun. Somebody said, "hey check out their weird rare ship, it's a lot of fun!" and my brain had a lightbulb moment and went "ooh what if you took that silly fun ship and leaned-in even harder with it, though?" and here we are.
Does a marriage between Thranduil and Finrod actually fit with all the canon of the Silm? I don't know, probably not; then again it might, simply because so much of the Silm is vague, especially when it comes to the elves of Mirkwood who barely even get mentioned once or twice. Personally I prefer having Legolas be born in Mirkwood and to be relatively young for an elf when Fellowship starts (there's no canon about that either way, I just like the vibes of it). However, this ship is a lot of fun too. In fact, I think it's already my favorite idea for an older-Legolas-with-ties-to-important-people take on the character, if that's how you want to take the character, simply because it is so much fun.
Do I think it's canon? No, of course not. But who cares? We're not writing Academic Articles on Accurate Tolkien Scholarship, we're writing fanfiction. We're having fun. So if you're a giggling-with-popcorn anon: good, awesome, glad to have you here enjoying the fun too. If you're a Ship Police Anon...well, acab and farewell because I frankly just do not have the time to give a shit about what somebody else ships or doesn't. Block the tag and move on.
#anon i grew up on x-men comics#AND the original star wars EU which fyi was an absolute clusterfuck#and spent my childhood plotting the most detailed and accurate AUs with my brother and our action figures that you can imagine#it often took an hour just to get the backstory set up so we could start playing#you think i can't make something with continuity as vague as lotr work the way i want it to?#please. i've never met a plothole i couldn't either pave-over or squirm my way around#believe you me anon: i have not yet begun to contort canon#this was easy this was nothing i could have concocted this in my sleep#my only weakness in this fight is that i simply don't KNOW silm-era canon off the top of my head#but i assure you that whatever nitpick you can present i will find a way through over or around#it's a weird and generally useless skill but i have a ridiculous knack for tap-dancing around canon#so go ahead bring it on i'm invested now let's spite-ship this all the way back to valinor XD#thranduil#finrod#legolas#thranduil x finrod#bling kings#shipping#my stuff#lotr#legolas has two daddies
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#This shouldn't be a surprise but seriously no one actually cares about my survival yes I've asked for help why would I get help#I'm functionally nocturnal and I keep staying up for like 48 hours and then sleeping for a day and I never know where I am#Or what day it is or if it's morning or night#Normal humans eat three meals a day and snacks right I think I maybe eat a snack every other day#I just don't feel hunger and my body hurts and cooking is so much effort I don't have#Weed used to help me be able to eat easily but now everything is just so hard and no food in house n cant go to store bc of ptsd too scary#I keep telling people when they ask that I am doing badly and need help but they as always just tell me to go to the store and buy food#Because it should be easy for a normal person!!! That would be such helpful and kind advice if I were normal#But I am not I am severely sick and traumatized and driving hurts so bad and stores give me panic attacks#Seriously if literally nobody cares about my struggling why not just be euthanized at this point?#This problem is so inconvenient to everyone and I have done all I can to convince people that I'm worth the inconvenience but :(#If I were worth talking to or visiting or helping people would have done that and I would be fine but I am not and that's okay#I genuinely don't mind being a husk at all#I'm just weirdly sad about it right now maybe because I think I feel hungry but genuinely I can't tell thanks autism#I also haven't been able to do my t shot in like three or four weeks I keep trying but I literally can't get the needle in :((#I imagine less testosterone in my system also makes me tired and lose my appetite#I'm so fucked up and nobody cares that I start my day at 8pm and am active and reply to emails and shit at 4am#Why would anyone notice that first of all but still. I would notice.#When even strangers are struggling I notice and I will do anything for anyone but it's selfish upon selfish to expect it back I understand#I keep looking for arfid and ed affirmations to help me but I can't find anything good#Genuinely . what the fuck#Just fucking need to be someone's dog feed me walk me put me in a cage teach me how to be better and treat me like I don't know shit#Because I don't I'm so stupid I can't even feed myself I'm dying please help me
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#writing woes#i'm trying to pick up in the middle of a chapter i've left sitting forever#IT'S SO HARD#what was i doing#how did we get here#where am i#WHAT IS GOING ON#i kind of have the gist but wow finding the right tone is HARD#also please god someone GET US OUT OF NORMANDY#cosigned author and easy co men both#great news folks we've just moved to cherbourg#close to getting back to utah beach#and then england#BUT NOT QUITE#._.#someone save me from myself#can i just....timeskip#no i cannot but IJDFSIKLFJDSKL#i wish i could write chapters out of order#or scenes out of order#whoever can do that has a magic power#share it#please#ahhhh
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Companies: we need workers so bad!! Theres a worker shortage and we desperately need people please apply please work for us please please please
Me: ok sure what do i need to do to apply
Companies: ok so you need 3 years experience in this exact job so we dont have to train you!!
Me: uhhh no but i have 4 years retail experience and this job I want is literally just slightly higher paying retail
Companies: ok do you have a masters degree
Me: did i mention this is basically higher paying retail?? Why would i have a masters degree for this specific thing, all it involves is talking to customers and pointing them to places and maybe cleaning or working a register. All of which i have 4 years experience doing
Companies: well then sorry but youre not qualified, you need experience AND a masters degree
Me:
Companies: WHY WON'T ANYONE WORK FOR US WE NEED WORKERS SO BAD
Me: I'd be a great worker if you'd be willing to spend like a week training me but go off I guess
#i dont see why i would need a masters degree for like working the children and teens section of the library#correct me if theres something im missing here but like#mostly i need to be able to clean and shelve books and tell people where to find books#maybe give book recommendations#maybe help people navigate the website or get help with their own personal devices#thats mostly what librarians do right#this isnt only about my local library btw its about several other unrelated jobs mostly that involve customer service at a front desk#but literally tho ive been a library aid for like 4 years and have done retail also for 4 years#and back in high school i apparently checked out the most books of anyone in the school (3 daily)#i can give recommendations for books in the children and teens section easy#especially manga thats also in the teens section#literally i think i would be so good at this job why do i need a masters#i get it if theyre worried about me not being bilingual but come on#and the other jobs again just stick me at the desk and give me like 1 or 2 weeks training and I'll prolly be good to go#please just give me a job i just need somewhere i can work long term while working on art on the side#is that too much to ask#sorry if this is negative or sounds like a vent post i just think its annoying that everyone complains about a worker shortage#and then turns away applicants with bachelors degrees just cuz they dont have experience with their one specific job#idk i dont get it
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i do love my car it is the perfect car aside from the. imperfections and frequent problems,
#toy txt post#😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔#why is the flex pipe broken again! who is responsible.#anyway i know how this sounds but also im right. i just want a tiny little car like i have#but like for all the parts to be high quality and easy to replace. u know. but alas#after spending hours trawling past the seo listicles about 5 signs that my flex pipe is failing#looking desperately for the forums where i cannot understand anything theyre saying. it seems like#when the shop replaced the flexpipe previously they must not have used an OEM part and swapped it out for a cheaper part#and or. my engine mounts are failing? and or. exhaust hangar issue???#and the guy at the mechanic shop was like oh its like a design flaw with the cars that have flex pipes and the front wheel drive engines#that rock back and forth instead of side to side so they just wear out faster. but also it shouldnt wear out this fast. and its bc my car is#a shitty cheap little piece of shit. but also its bc something is wrong like this happens to plenty of other cars too that arent fiats#and im sure we'll look into it and shrig and get the flex pipe replaced and ill be like okay. can we replace it with a just straight pipe#that isnt flexing? no bc thatll lead to wear and tear destorying more expensive parts? ok. what about beefier mounts or more mounts to make#the engine chill out. no probably not bc it probably needs to move a little bit or else theyd find a way to make it stop moving. well okay#what if we take the engine out and fucking rotate it so that it rocks side to side instead?since all the car guys are waxing poetic about#that? no? thats not possible? i think it probably is possibly but what you mean is its not feasible or realistic and its not worth it and i#should just keep replacing this one piece or what the fuck ever.#mostly i think im just tired of how my parents treat my car now? i get it you hate it. please just accept the fact that you are going to#hate any car i have bc im not ever being the newest release of the pedestriancrusher3000 suv tank that beeps when someone is next to me#like i joke but literally it seems like all they want is for me to get a different bigger car. i dont want or need a bigger car.#we have been having this argument since i started learning to drive. no one who taught me to drive understands that bigger car=more anxious#cos im anxious about Different Things than they are. maybe i could have slightly better Visibility but at least i can see over my fucking#hood#anyway. i do wish i could get my exact car but with like higher quality materials/construction and like. as a plug in hybrid instead#electric sounds nice in theory but i dont think its for me just yet?#ive seen new electric fiats (which they arent selling here btw) (fuck you if you want a small new car lol)#car companies be like america? oh those fuckers only want the largest tanks we can legally allow on the road. and then the 3 of us american#folk that do actually want small cars are like hey uh. how do i get a small one. i know yall make them. ive seen it#and the companies are like oh we dont sell them to you. you only like big cars
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The last like 12 hours have been one disaster after another tbh and I think I am mostly to blame
#citalopram withdrawals + too much weed had me puking my guts up#woke up sober but still feeling lousy. from citalopram withdrawals#i finally managed to go get my prescription so hopefully this shit will be over soon. hopefully#i’m not having any more edibles until i’ve been on this for like a week. i swear to god i can control myself#anyway so i fixed all of that but then realised i ordered the wrong circular needle#i’ve decided to try out those really small circulars for sock knitting because i hate magic loop and dpns are so easy to lose#and knitting with dpns just feels so dramatic for no reason#but instead of the sock dpns i’ve actually just ordered 20cm of wire connected to two needles that i feel will be way too long#which is fine; just need to cancel the order#tell me why i go to my notes app to draft an email (i neverrrr draft emails directly into my email inbox. i have had this habit for years#first of all the gmail website is janky and second of all there have been too many times i’ve accidentally sent an email too soon#so either ‘please find attached’ with no attachments or a contextless ‘jeremy i need help’. i also just find using notes makes formatting#easier but anywayyyy)#so i’ve gone to my notes app and all of my notes are GONE#i can’t even express to you what a disaster that is#7 years and over 500 notes. gone#all i’m getting when i open the notes app is a heading saying ‘folders’ (with no folders listed) and a search bar#if i search i get nothing; and i can create new notes and type into them but they don’t save#LUCKILY everything except maybe this past week is backed up onto my ipad and laptop; i just checked#so that’s all the important information. i’ve really just lost a shopping list and a couple of links#but WHAT IS GOING ON. at first i was like ‘fresh start’ but i can’t even save the new notes. i just have a blank app now#hopefully updating my phone will fix it. i have like 12gb free on my phone and over 30gb in icloud.. they wouldn’t just be cleared without#my consent. they’ve gotta be SOMEWHERE. i can maybe sync them back across from my laptop if need be#but whyyyy must they be GONE. the app just feels like it’s glitched out in general. maybe the app itself needs updating#if i was one of those girlies who uses notes as a diary and is really aesthetic with it i’d be pissed#i’m mostly just missing old passwords and random links and sims challenge scoring lmao#not to mention probably 200 email drafts and some bad high poetry#personal
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