#and Gort is here 2

[daemon-in-my-head]

Guess who worked 50h last week but still decided to start another horribly detailed whatever-the-fuck?

This masochist.

[doomingthenarrative]

im curious about something bg3 fandom

also if you want to put your favorite in the tags!

[venushorned-a]

"If I were to kiss you, would you turn me away or pull me closer?"

Her dressing room was modest, but it was private and plush, with a chaise and armchair tucked into one corner and a small table overflowing with roses between them. Against the opposite wall, a delicate brass rack held the scraps of silk, tulle, and strings of pearls that made up her costumes, and the central feature was, of course, the vanity: grand, pale wood with an ornate triptych mirror, currently covered with the skirt she had peeled off sometime before. The dressing gown she slipped into was longer, ruffles at the neckline curling back to expose the corset beneath, and flowing white sleeves trailed in her wake. 

Gossamer had been invited to spend the season as a guest feature at a theatre in the Upper City, and Baldur’s Gate had given her—was still giving her—a warm welcome. It was no Waterdeep, but things were more complicated in Waterdeep. There were real things there, responsibilities and expectations, but in the City of Blood, she was just an ingénue in a state of dreaming. She would waste time hiding from… something she had not quite named yet in Baldur’s Gate, and when whatever it was caught up to her there, she would return home with her tail between her legs. In the meantime, she would enjoy the champagne and roses waiting for her each night, and she would revel in the view of the sky from her dressing room windows. It wasn’t an especially good one, and Waterdeep should have spoiled her for good views—but the sky was the sky. She didn’t care.

What surprised her was the increasing frequency with which happenstance appeared to have been placing her in the pathway of Lord Enver Gortash, who, for whatever reason, was becoming a persistent itch under her skin. It was an irritation that demanded fresh attention with every smirk caught across a room, every polite greeting shared among mixed company. She smiled at him like they shared some secret; he smiled back, and she liked it more than she was strictly comfortable with.

He was just a man—that much was true. Even up here on the surface, where they were allowed to wield great power, she found them easy enough to master. With him, there was just… something. He was formidable, she supposed. Intelligent eyes. And he had started paying visits.

There beneath the dim flicker of violet faerie fire—a lingering preference from the City of Spiders—they talked. Laughed. Teased. He met her wit for wit and then some as cool ocean air cut through open windows and candles dripped fragrant wax, and the second time he came, she asked for a closer look at the gauntlet. Gortash was on the chaise while she pulled pins and pearls from her hair before the vanity mirror, letting it fall curl-by-curl as her nimble fingers worked, but he stood at the request and appeared behind her. She listened only distantly to the midnight-rich drawl of his explanation in her ear as he stood over her with his gauntleted hand on the vanity, allowing her to observe while she continued the tedious work of unpinning her hair. 

“If I were to kiss you, would you turn me away or pull me closer?”

That got her attention. Gossamer looked up suddenly, finding the reflection of Gortash’s eyes in the mirror, and lowered her hands from her hair as she glanced down to his scarred mouth. An irritating, impatient little voice in her head was annoyed that he would ask at all instead of just getting on with it; she expertly ignored that.

“I don’t know.” She shook her hair out, letting loose curls bounce and settle with the tinkle of the bells on her horns. And then she stood and turned to face him, leaning against the edge of the vanity and looking up from beneath pale lashes. She wanted it the other way around: him looking up at her. “I haven’t decided yet.”

@lordgortrash | from: x

[shadowoftheuncrowned]

Durgetash facts and my delulu headcanons pt.2

There is a head in Balthazar's laboratory in act 2. If you insert various 'dark mind' brains you have collected so far, the head speaks of Gortash's experiments:

I found it odd that this head happened to have the same face as my Durge lol

This brain probably belonged to some bard he randomly found,

That other brain tells us more about Gortash visiting all of his experiments in Balthazar's laboratory regularly to check on them.

My delulu analysis : I am not quite sure when he visited the laboratory but given the brains call him 'lord' and given that he is still here behind the door at this moment, makes me think he actually found and read that letter on Balthazar's bench. You know which letter I am talking about.

The line we get from Gortash- "Is that what you..?" -when attacking him as a Durge is unfinished and interrupted by the sudden earthquake. I believe he meant to say, "Is that what you meant with that letter???"

Hehehe. This is all. Have Gort tiddies as tax for reading this far lol

[k3yboi]

Hi Gort! I've been following you for a while and I LOVE your art style. I was chatting with Tree just now and he encouraged me to ask you to draw platonic Mo^2 (Morella and Monty). So [gestures vaguely] here I am! No pressure though, even just a 5 minute doodle will be fine. Thank you for all of your hard work <3

eeeee i’m eating you thankyou so much 😞

ive actually never really given those two much thought, but while thinking i got this doodle idea. i gave up a tad with the bandages but i actually like how it turned out

they’re having girls night…

[thedorkurge]

Ohh wait I just remembered gort literally enslaved the Emperor. It’s gonna be real mad about extending Orpheus’ protection to him

Okay i actually do have a lot of thoughts about this, and I don't really intend to touch on it much in Schism, so I'll just dump them all here real quick.

(Also thank you for giving me a chance to infodump about my fic ily)

In the Schism timeline, The Emperor specifically chose Enver as his main point of contact with the group/prism bearer BECAUSE of their past. It really boils down to three key things:

1: Enver is the best choice.

He's ruthlessly ambitious, clearly very capable, and a natural leader. He's simply the best choice out of the group to actually carry out The Emperor's plans. Not to mention, if the Emperor chose someone else, Enver was likely to just... Get in the way.

2: Enver is basically a mirror of The Emperor and Illithids as a whole

The Emperor understands Enver, because he understands ambition and the desire to rule. Enver chose to use the Grand Design, because it so closely mirrored his own desires as a banite- to dominate the entire world and rule everyone. In the end, The Emperor wants that too. It's hardwired into Illithids. That understanding can make it easier to manipulate him into seeing the Emperor's side in all of this. After all, if you think you're the best and smartest creature in the room at all times, you're going to pick a "champion" that you deem worthy. And you're gonna be arrogant enough to think that you can manipulate said champion regardless.

I honestly don't think The Emperor would dwell much what was done to it. It's forward thinking, looking for the best outcome for the future. And someone who once beat it is the perfect ally, because they were a worthy enemy.

3: Revenge

Even though I don't think The Emperor specifically seeks out revenge, we know it's capable of feeling satisfaction when its enemies fall. So you can't tell me that a part of it wouldn't absolutely relish in the opportunity to place Enver under its thumb. Enver got it trapped, but now the Emperor is in control- not only can it control the narrative, but Enver is also completely dependent on it for protection. It holds true for both Illithids and banites that control is the best form of revenge. And by having control over Enver, The Emperor has flipped the narrative, showing that it's greater than Enver in spite of Enver getting the upper hand in the past.

Basically they're two arrogant assholes who both see control over the other as a way to prove themselves. Outsmarting an Illithid. Controlling a banite. What could go wrong.

[loderlied]

He lies upon her, and his will becomes hers. No, she thinks, it is not a becoming if it always was. His will is her, and she and he move the scissors to her head.

~~

Louise Bernard gives all of herself to Enver Gortash. How could she not, when it was always rightfully his?

here you go my contribution to gort week day 2. content warnings for severe emotional manipulation, implied sex and also gortash is the one being worshipped if that’s not ur jam.

[daemon-in-my-head]

Haven't done one of these in ages but ask game kinda ish except I'm including an obnoxious twist?

Songs that describe ur Durge or Durgetash in situations - but without lyrics, were going with vibes lads

Here are the rules: it must be an instrumental piece. No lyrics. For further details nd exaples see the end of the post. Also, explain why you chose it. What's the vibe you're going for? How does it relate to the character? Are there particular sections in the music you have specific visions or smth for? A rather quiet passage that resembles their emotional state? Is it messy because they are messy? That kind of stuff.

Their overall vibe, what's the song that makes you go 'yeah that's them in a nutshell'?

If Durge had an intro; what's the bg music and if ya feel like it, what's happening at which parts of the track?

Act 1; what plays on the rock behind their tent if they had one?

Act 2; if their inner monologue plays, what track accompanies it?

Act 3 - before the temple; how we doing? What's our vibe? What little tune accompanies them? Are we a lil tense, relaxed, what's going on?

Act 3 - after the temple; what music speaks for their choices and mindset? How fucked is the sword coast?

Faerûn is a magic medival setting, the esteemed upper city gatherings didn't have a rock star to create the ambiance, so what would the little ensemble play to describe whatever a tyrant and a Bhaalspawn got going on to the listening patriars pre tadpole?

Obv, what's the vibe like after that slight amnesia and forgetting all about the sad little racoon man like between em? What updated version does the ensemble play for the nosy patriars?

Also generally if it differe; what's the vibe of pre tadpole Durge like?

The vibe some time after the epilogue when the dust settled - what describes this 'new' durge?

Bonus cuz why not; the one piece of music that describes Gort or his side best?

I should specify what I mean with instrumental: grand orchestras, classical pieces, a single guitar, reimaginations of classic pieces or pop songs, movie or game soundtracks, any kind of instrumental track rly, the only retirement is that there's no distinguishable lyrics. Vocals are fine if it's atmospheric like for example, the vocals in DOS2 main theme or the nightsong track. Let the music and vibes speak for themselves. Think about what ur listening and what aspects of your characters it matches. How is it of relevance to them?

[kitthenameless]

I finished my BG3 evil durge run!

Evil runs were clearly not the intended vision, judging from how spotty the content is. But I did see some new stuff, and the new ending cinematic goes hard. (I did the evil Tav ending.) Overall, I had a lot of fun really leaning into the evil, and getting a whole little movie in the end was a nice finale.

Also this was my first Tactician run, though I had 5-6 people for most fights, and my durge could fly. Still, was a higher difficulty than I've done before, so *pats self on back*

Anyway, here's the summary of my Act 2 and Act 3. Warning for general spoilers and evil ending screenshots at the end!

Not much happened in Act 2. Killed Isobel but spared Aylin and managed to get her and Jaheira to join camp. Poor Gale tried to save the gnomes by opening their cell once the guards were all dead, but they just died outside. Astarion broke up with Durge (Remiel), but there were never feelings involved anyway. I made a whole post about my mess of a Myrkul fight in which I decided to loose a spectator instead of reloading lol. Other than that, they did what they had to do and moved on, leaving the lands cursed.

Then it was onto Act 3. Memories rushing back after the coronation, Remiel decided to go give the Archduke a little private visit. Gortash warned him not to come back without the netherstones, but he doesn't take orders from Gortash. And he needed to remind him of that ;-)

In the city, I couldn't figure out how to kill the people on the list without initiating combat with everyone nearby, so the group started kidnapping people and taking them to the sewers to kill them there. The fact that you can technically do that (by exploiting fast travel) is a lot funnier to me than it should be. Also met this mysterious man!

Continued doing evil things. (Skip this paragraph if you don't care about the list of evil choices.) Got into the Murder Tribunal, sacrificed Jaheira, and killed Valeria to become an Unholy Assassin. Killed Thrumbo. Went to the Society of Brilliance where they found a massacre and met the gith egg baby all grown up. Made a deal with the hag. Broke into House of Hope just to steal Raphael's valuables and kill his boy toy. Handed Aylin over to Lorroakan, because Remiel figured it'd be easier to bring Lorroakan under his thumb than Aylin. Handed Shadowheart over to the Sharrans. Did not help Astarion ascend because he didn't want him to have that much power. Still killed Cazador and the spawns though. Regretted killing the spawns when all the Gur kept calling it a kindness and praised him for doing the "right" thing.

And of course he killed Orin. But he rejected daddy because he decided he wants to do evil for himself.

The only person Remiel has a soft spot for is Gortash. He doesn't want to mind control him, he wants to rule with him sorta, but he still wanted the power for himself and couldn't have Gort getting in the way. So when they met at the Morphic Pool, he (in my headcanon) knocked him out or used poisons to put him to sleep. He even left his crossbow and a healing potion. (But of course they acted like immature children before that.)

Skipped the entire courtyard with invisibility. Got to the final bit of brain quickly, but I failed all attempts to hit it at the Morphic Pool, so it had full HP, and it got dicey at the end. The few characters still alive just barely managed to win before their platform was obliterated.

And then Remiel betrayed everyone and took control of the brain... and the world. *muahahahaha*

The end 🙂 Gosh I love his evil faces lol.

Mods: Kylin's Heads. Silver's Hair Pack. Slutty Closet. Glitzy Horns. Heroes never die - Angel Wings. One of Astralities's skintone mods, I think. Y-Shaped Autopsy Scars. Lokelani's Lavish Livery.

[eye-of-yelough]

anyway here’s the aeryn/gortash dynamic explanation.

nsfw shit under the cut. CW for. i mean so much. but specifically CNC

because it is all consensual, despite the atrocities. although it’s worth mentioning that that does not make it healthy and there’s definitely a lot of manipulation going on so like. is it. its dubious that’s for fucking sure.

So. their dynamic is really just me taking “psychosexual warfare” and seeing how far i can possibly take it. That’s it in a nutshell. also exploration of how a sexual “relationship” between a hypersexual (aeryn) and aroace (gortash. to me) would work.

Aeryn’s hypersexuality is a real point of interest to Gortash, and is his main angle when trying to pick apart his psyche, the way his behaviour changes depending on how long he’s gone without, how it seems intrinsically linked to his Urges, “whoever decided to call it bloodlust was a fucking genius” - Aeryn, probably.

That fascination really hits its pique when, somewhere a between 2 and 3 years into their unsteady partnership, gort wakes up in the middle of the night to aeryn just straight up jerkin it. staring at him. (wether he was already there because aeryn stayed over after them being awake for 50 hours plotting and doing medical malpractice or he just walked all the way there from the undercity to break in and wack it to gort’s sleeping body, i don’t know. but it’s important to me that you know that with aeryn, while the former is more likely, the latter is entirely plausible. he’s a creep.) obviously this brings up a lot of question in gortash’s head. “did he want to be caught?” (most definitely.) “has he done this before without me noticing?” (you can bet on it, mate.)

Sad thing is, I can’t for the life of me figure out what gort would actually do in the moment here, but it’s when he realises that if he wants to manipulate Bhaal’s favourite child, to claim, to conquer, he’s going to have to speak his language. so the next morning he very nonchalantly brings up the incident that Aeryn is eagerly pretending didn’t happen, and offers his help him with his little sex addiction. puts himself in this caring, almost therapeutic role. bullshit, of course. he has no intention of fixing just yet. only after he’s been broken can he be fixed, remade in his perfect image. and aeryn, to his credit, does know that it’s bullshit. he just underestimates the depth of it. See, he knows that Gortash wants to break him. he knows that gortash is a manipulative, domineering control freak. but he kind of just. thinks it’s a weird sex thing. his reaction to gort’s proposal is basically “you’re even weirder than i thought. okay fine. i’ll play your game. i’ll win in the end.”

That’s another key part of their dynamic: mutual misunderstanding. Aeryn thinks it’s a game, Gortash thinks it’s war. Gortash thinks he’s breaking Aeryn, but Aeryn’s loving it.

Gortash’s “therapy” is anything but, of course. Aeryn doesn’t become less of a sex pest, he just finds it increasingly difficult to enjoy himself with anyone but Gortash, who knows him, what he likes and doesn’t like, inside and out. (all part of the plan, the possessive cunt) which pisses Aeryn off to no end because the man Just Won’t Fuck Him in the way he wants. oh, they’re doing weird “stabbing as a metaphor for penetration”, sexually charged medical malpractice, voyeurism, full on bdsm shit all the time, but there’s very little… touching. Gortash just gets off way more on denying Aeryn what he wants while slowly driving him insane with desperation than he ever would if they just. had sex. This isn’t to say they never do, but we’re talking 10 years down the line here, and only under very specific conditions. (more on that in a bit.) If aeryn was right about one thing, it’s Gortash being a weird sexual control freak.

anyway here’s some things their warfare includes:

Gortash bringing some noble up to his chambers to seduce them, notices the window he left closed is open, a chair in the corner’s cushion being smushed down by an invisible weight, and thinking “ah, i’m performing for two tonight.”

one of Gortash’s main weird psychosexual fantasies about Aeryn being turning him into an Actual Doll and keeping him on his shelf for all eternity. he makes many different types of dolls after Aeryn’s likeness, including plushies that he holds at night for a few months before giving them to Aeryn just to savour the look of confusion and disgust on his face.

Gortash stealing some of Aeryn’s Bhaal-sculpted skin and turning it into gloves.

Aeryn waking up after Gortash spikes him in increasingly awkward positions over the years (this happens a lot. like, a lot.) the first time he wakes up bound, gagged and blindfolded in gort’s basement. “i just wanted to see how long it would take you unti you freed yourself. 2 minutes and 31 seconds if you were wondering. i’m impressed :)” eventually he gets used to that routine and he just ends up laying under gort’s desk for a few hours, listening to him work, Gortash occasionally talking to him like you do to a pet. this is probably the closest they get to domesticity. A few years down the line, Aeryn wakes up naked, covered in bruises and black handprints, aching between his thighs.

Knowing it finally happened, but having no memory? If I had to pinpoint the closest Gortash ever got to winning the war, it was there. something in his brain genuinely breaks that night.

Oh. And they only kiss once. Right before Aeryn’s lobotomy, as well, it’s a whole thing. I might make that into a separate post. or you can send an ask. that’d be nice :)

edit: here it is

[sybaritick]

best of!

I was tagged by @say-lene (who is absolutely one of the best writers in this fandom) to discuss a few pieces of fic that best exemplify my writing/style/personality. So here are my thoughts! :D

4 - At Knifepoint [Astarion/Gale, 2.4k, E]

Astarion's face was cruel and angular in the half-light of the darkened library, stark shadows cast across his features, lips curled into a teasing smile. The Dispel Magic spell rushed over him faster than he could answer it, dark and sour like a sickening wave, and the invisibility curled away from his body like the burnt edge of a newspaper.

I love to play with the contrast between what the rational brain wants and what the stupid horny subby brain wants and this fic absolutely goes in on that. We like a little fearplay and horror and Gale's guilty lust for being eaten. It was for an exchange to go with this incredible artwork!

3 - that urge often miscalled 'free will' [Gortash/Gale, 4.3k, E]

Gale thinks, for an odd second, that he can feel the flow of data pour into his throat and spread through his limbs, an anesthetic tingling in his veins, drowsy and even. He knows it’s nothing of the sort. That was the sort of foolish thing one might have pictured as a child, but data is weightless and instant and empty, and no zeroes and ones fill his veins. Enver watches from his chair, glancing between Gale and the computer while he makes his cryptic little adjustments. He has a leg tucked under him, a thick-soled work boot wedged under the opposite thigh.  Gale feels the fingers of his right hand flex and pull involuntarily, and the hand balls up into a fist that makes his nails bite into his palm for a good second before releasing. “Sorry, I’m not sure–” Gale starts, before looking over at Gortash, who has the hint of a smile curling onto his lips. Enver responds wordlessly, typing something blunt and fast and watching as the fingers of Gale’s other hand flex in turn, one by one. “A bit of manual testing for that faster transmission of reflexes I suggested,” Enver says. “Pardon me for the lack of warning.” Gale feels the swell of fear like an ignoble tightness in his throat that makes it irresponsible to swallow.

Am I bold enough to put a fic I just posted last night in my "best of"? Yes. It was this or Incentives for Compliance and this one exemplifies my issues even more. :) i love writing about the horror of losing control of your own mind and body and this fic is Very Clearly About That. oh and it also has that relentlessly horny pussy description that's important:

He slots in the vulva, running a thumb over the plump hairy outer lips, just ghosting over the inner folds peeking through in soft ripples, across the mons fat and rounded above; a beautiful match to Gale’s form.

2 - oh, rotten little thing [Astarion/Gale, 1.9k, M]

“So you admit it,” Astarion said, pulling his hand back. “Naughty thing. I bet so little power wouldn't be nearly enough to sate it. Perhaps I’m just an appetizer, then. Something to whet its appetite before you hunt down a wizard for your main course." "If you’re so certain it’s developed its own sort of vampirism, I would think you’d be more careful," Gale warned. "And I'm certainly not willing to consume the Weave of a person the way I would an object– if such a thing is even possible." "Oh, I think you would," Astarion answered gleefully. “If it’s you or another? If the alternative is the bomb in your chest leveling the entirety of Baldur’s Gate?”

This is probably my favorite bloodweave fic I've written because it gets to something I enjoy a lot about their personalities-- the way an unhealthy Astarion might take pleasure in luring Gale to be "worse", to dragging Gale down to his own level, and the way Gale has his pride but also a certain practicality and is more willing than he'd like to admit to bend his ethical principles a bit. There's also some great banter in this one which I really enjoy.

1 - Tephra Year [Gortash/Gale, 25k+, E]

and Highharvestide [Gortash/Gale, 3.9k, M]!

In the heat of the moment all he could imagine was that Gortash found this all the more desirable. A nice, fat, pliable mage to bury his cock in and rule the city with. What would they become, if Gortash's plans came to fruition? Gale was not naïve enough to believe his ambitions stopped at becoming Archduke of Baldur's Gate.  He'd be kept neck-deep in vile projects while Enver’s influence swallowed up each little town along the Chionthar. He had no doubt the Black Hand had designs on the rest of the Sword Coast. He'd set his sights on Waterdeep, and perhaps Gale was just another piece of his claim, another spoil of war, a pretty souvenir from the City of Splendors.

this fic is essentially designed to contain most of my favorite topics, tropes, and kinks, from the relatively ordinary (power imbalance, transmasc dom, manipulation, the tension between what you want and what you wish you wanted) to the weirder and more specific (feeding + weight gain as domestication, guilty masturbation over things you are morally opposed to, classism, politics, questions of guilt and responsibility/Whose Fault Is This Really?, transhumanism and evil biotech).

as for throwing in Highharvestide... I would be remiss not to include at least one overtly feedist fic when it's definitely the kink I'm most "known" for (and the one I know some of you are following me for. 😉) I was truly torn between featuring this and catalyst, but I think this one better exemplifies what I am really here for... feeding as a power game, fattening as domestication, how appealing Gale's new softness might be to a partner...

for that reason i have taken a lot of joy in writing Tephra Year + its side story/ies. I think my enthusiasm comes through and makes the piece even better than my usual work :)

---

and I will tag, if they're interested: @tuffgreg, @chronurgy, @archduke-enver-gortash, and @spellmage! :D (hopefully I managed to pick people who haven't been tagged yet, I tried to!)

[kawareo]

2 and 6 for the durgetash creator asks? :)

(was waiting for you to rb this one djgkdh)

(I was three hours late, im sorry! T-T)

2. Romance, queerplatonic, eldritch horror? How would you describe the relationship these two have? This time without limitation.

Romance, eldrich horror, queer and ready to tear (up the world), partners in crime, equals, ect ect They've been engaged for a few years before the bg3 events even though Gortash wasn't aware of it, Durge proposed by asking him if Gort can be the last person he kills, and Gort agreed without knowing what a Bhaalist wedding is.

6. What's the most wholesome hc you have for them? Something they did, a particular approach at bonding, just them being disgustingly soft once? Some good old hand in hand vivisection?

I write surprisingly a lot of wholesome stuff for them! Like this, or this, or this entire longfic! They essentially are very cute, as long as you look through red colored glasses and see the mauling and gore and manipulation for affection which it is lol. Durge is especially very affectionate, but his Urges do make him maul Gortash far too often; Gort meanwhile needs a few years before it hits him that Durge genuinely likes him for all of his quirks and that's when he commits to the 'equals' thing, before that he was just trying to get himself a Bhaalspawn attack dog.

But if you want actual wholesome stuff, here; Gortash keeps making new fancy weapons for Durge and also likes to force him to get some sleep, meanwhile Durge cares a lot about Gort's physical health (he got him wrist braces for his carpal tunnel and forces him to wear it) and even while he doesn't understand technology not even close to as well as Gort does, he could listen to him rambling about it for hours

[pixie-in-a-moonlantern]

WIP Wednesday

Apparently, writers post their WIPs on this glorious day. Why not, I'll bite - I'm in the middle of something right now ;)

As some of you know, I have this fun little thrupple of f!Durge, Gort and Halsin. I've written 2 smutty Durgetash fics, so now it's time for a Halsin-only interlude fic before I mix them up more.

So I share with you this smutty and fluffy snippet 💛

Explicit NSFW 18+, f!Durge, loving smut (inexperienced blowjob), angst, fluff. (No aggressive abs and dehydrated muscles 😘)

His breath catches when my teeth gently nip at his earlobe. The tips of my fingers run along the swirly lines of his tattoo, then down to his chest to tangle in the bushy body hair. I press my palms into his flesh, enjoying the perfect ratio of firmness and softness of his impressive muscles.

I toss all restraint aside and bite into his scrumptious breast. He chuckles, but I sense the tremble of his hand as it comes up to rake my hair. Encouraged by this, I gently bite into his skin lower and lower, over the mild hill of his plush tummy, right down to the hem of his trousers.

I hear him gulp above me and I grin to myself, my mouth already watering at the sight of the bulge of his cock straining against the fabric.

I look up and he knows what I’m asking. One corner of his mouth curls upwards and he nods, his hazel eyes wild.

I’ve only done this to him twice and I was bad at it—I couldn’t fit much of him in my mouth and I gagged way too soon—but I loved tasting him and he seemed to enjoy letting me. So I free the thick shaft from his trousers and lie on my stomach with my head in his lap, so I can use both my hands to play.

It’s long and thick and dreamy. A delicate pattern of veins stretches across the delicious purplish velvet. The head is like a bell hat on top, already softly glistening, sporting the clear bead of his excitement as a fancy accessory.

“Has anyone ever told you your cock is gorgeous?” I can't help but ask.

He’s watching me with hooded eyes and seems taken by surprise by my question. So I wait for nothing and wrap my lips around him. I hum in approval, tasting the musky goodness. Then begin unhurriedly licking and sucking, taking in as much as I safely can.

The sounds I’m drawing from him are music to my ears. The vulnerability of a man with his manhood at the mercy of a lover’s mouth… there’s something divine about it. I’m almost positive a chunk of my enjoyment lies in the desire to have power over people in an entirely different situation: torture and murder. But the majority of me loves it for these sounds.

And for the chaotic, unfocused way his hand is softly grasping for my hair; not to control, but to caress.

“Nara,” he manages to grunt as I’m mindlessly swirling my tongue around the head, tasting his musk. “I need to be inside you.”

My eyes widen in a silent question. Oh well, I shrug to myself. I can give it a good try. I angle him into my mouth, try to relax my throat as much as I can, and slowly slide more and more of him in.

I feel his fingers touch my chin as he chuckles. I let go of his cock and look up.

“I had something else in mind,” he smiles and gently guides me up to his mouth. “Your turn,” he whispers and kisses me, his hands already pulling my clothes off.

“Oh,” I snicker. “Not getting better at it, am I?”

“You still need practice,” he rumbles, amusement in his tone. “But it’s not that I didn’t enjoy it. I just want to repay you.”

“You’ve kept me alive through the worst case of my murderous urges, I think there’s nothing to repay,” I shake my head.

“I would have done that regardless of the shape of our bond, Nara,” he looks me in the eyes, mien serious. “I want to repay your love. You could have been with your old flame right now, getting treated like the deity you are. Instead, you’re here with me, worried about my feelings. I fail to put into words what that means to me.”

“Halsin,” I breathe out, hugging him. “That just makes me want to shower you with love even harder. I want you to feel loved. Do you feel loved when you’re with me?”

He gulps and softly sighs, “Yes.”

I can tell he’s scared. Perhaps expecting me to disappear. I can’t even imagine what would make me do that if I was free—but Bhaal can still make the choice for me. There’s really nothing I can promise as long as I’m puppeteered by his hand.

So I hug Halsin tighter, running my fingers through his hair, inhaling their scent. He slowly finishes undressing me, his fingers electrifying every inch of my skin they touch. The air is getting cool as the sun is slowly setting, but his enormous form is like a furnace, keeping me warm against the breeze.

[roro-the-sleepy-monster]

Rambling abt my Durge here because I don't want to clutter my writing blog.

For context, Aelune is my agender Drow Fighter Durge, with dual blades because I'm Edgy Like That. They're also the first playthrough I reached act 3 on, met Gortash, and went "fuck, they're still desperately in love with this asshole, hunh?"

I had romanced Astarion on the playthrough out of curiosity, and I still flip-flop on whether Aelune actually ended up romancing him or walked the path alone.

Regardless, they're my cold, reserved OC who hides a modicum of sweetness very far down in their heart. I've enjoyed playing someone who is true neutral (probably chaotic neutral before they lost their memory), and honestly truly morally grey.

Further rambling below!

Originally I built them out of curiosity. I wanted to explore durge, but was also interested in the context being a drow provides. Little did I know this seems to be a very popular combination.

Truthfully, Aelune's backstory, while determined with a set of dice rolls (blessed be Xanathar's Guide to Everything), eventually morphed into something that was meant to be complimentary/contrasting to Astarion. Our little Star is outwardly flamboyant and affectionate, while actually being cautious and reserved. Aelune is outwardly cold and vicious, while holding a tenderness that they carefully protect and rarely show.

This was all thrown out the fucking window when I reached Act 3. Gortash approaches Durge with a tenderness (that might be fake, he's a manipulator and a tyrant) that turned my entire writing brain on its head. Durge is not even REMOTELY a good person, regardless of how you play them post memory loss. They did a whole lot of fucked up shit. They're gonna have to deal with that eventually.

"But Loaf!" You cry, and I become bewildered as to how you know my online handle. "Durge doesn't remember anything, how does meeting Gortash change anything in Act 1 and 2?"

Well, your body remembers what your brain does not, and sometimes your brain remembers what you don't. Confusing? Follow me here.

Even after you've forgotten trauma and moved on, you still have a gut reaction to certain triggers. Now this isn't just a depressing thing, but sometimes you just "have a feeling" about one thing or another, and more often than not, it's proven right in the end.

I still think Aelune would have slept with Astarion. Because they're smart enough to clock what Astarion's trying to do, and doesn't care. Star might've still caught feelings, even. But Aelune would still feel something was weird, like a feeling they were committing a social faux pas, and probably would've very gently friendzoned Astarion after the Act 2 incident with our least favorite vampire-obsessed blood merchant.

Very much a "oh you need a friend, not a lover. And I don't think I've had friends before this either, so it works out in my favor."

Besides, if you've read any of my works, you'd know Aelune had a child with Gortash, not that he's aware of it. Probably pre Elder Brain capture, considering the "raid" is when it's approximated Orin got the jump on Durge. Aelune's smart enough to know it would be dangerous to let anyone in on that secret, even their lover, as Gortash's goals are focused on power and tyrant stuff. And while I think Gort and Aelune loved each other in their own weird intense ways, tenderness was still weakness.

And pregnancy and a baby is the greatest weakness of all, in that regard. Bhaal could steal and manipulate the baby, Orin would use it to manipulate Durge, Ketheric...I actually don't know, he's got a weird daughter complex. And of course Gortash, mentioned previously.

This is all to say realizing Gortash had some sort of thing for Durge and vice versa makes for a lot more context as to why Aelune is so careful and reserved. Even if they don't remember, they know there's something worth protecting, even from their first and only love.

Later on? After Gortash is taken care of and the Absolute is obliterated? Maybe Aelune could find comfort in someone else. Maybe a post-Cazador Astarion, once he's settled into himself and his freedom. Maybe Halsin, considering he's the only one close in age to Aelune (Aelune is around 200, which I guess so is Astarion, but there's a maturity difference there).

Besides, in the end, I love the idea of the silver-tongued tyrant meeting a cold and strangely skittish Bhaalspawn and coaxing them into some sort of alliance, only to fall in love. I think Gort enjoys the challenge of constantly wooing someone who's determined to keep their distance, and Aelune is very quietly pleased and amused by the strange courtship.

[plethomacademia]

hi bestie thoughts about maeve, how did she appear to you when you first started thinking about a bg3 oc? which details came first? her appearance? her personality? her romances?

Hello! Oh I love this question. I'm going to cut bc it's long and also I might use this as an excuse to post her original version from guild wars 2 :)

I have a few character types that I tend to recycle and reinvent for different games and Maeve is a direct descendant of one of my Guild Wars 2 characters. In that game, she was a noble woman who had been disowned by her family for her necromancy, not because of the necromancy as much as her specialty in flesh golem magic. She was a thin ghost of a woman who cared about her appearance and used her skills to work in a noble house, where she ended up marrying the lord and being an absolute villain in social scenes.

I knew I wanted to do a dark urge that was a bard because I found the idea of a charismatic cult leader to be fascinating. I knew I wanted someone who could slip into social situations and be undetectable, so a common race at an average height. From there I kind of clicked around in the character creator and ended up with an elf version of Aglaeca with some tweaks (Ag has no freckles and green eyes, Maeve is freckled to hell and has silver eyes, Ag wears plain makeup and Maeve wears a sharp eyeliner and red lips).

The things that are the same and are kind of the core to this character I keep remaking are the ideas of social situations as combat, the idea of womanhood and performance being interlinked, and the idea of a ice queen that is hiding a soft gooey interior at all costs.

Maeve's personality shifted a lot as I started to write her but had solidified before I began to post. The first thing I wrote about her was this chapter in the long fic where she meets Gortash. This is a very Aglaeca scene: masks on masks, polite conversation used in a combative nature, and that hint of something more. I would say though that the chapter where she leads her cult was kind of where what makes her Maeve clicked: the theatricality, the manipulation and love bombing, the use of her sexuality and desire to attract and the use of violence to keep in line. Maeve is a lot more direct than Aglaeca or any other version of this character.

I will say and this is critical to me, I did not write a single word for this character until I had finished her playthrough. If I had written my original version of Maeve, she would have been a lot colder, a lot more put together, a lot more Aglaeca. When I started her romance, I knew Astarion could turn a character into a vampire and I thought she might like that, but the romance kind of sideways swiped me and the softness of it, the echo between redeemed dark urge and spawn Astarion, it really changed what she ended up being. They are very similar and so they fell into each others orbit in a way that made her story a lot sadder, a lot more tender, a lot more full of doubt and anxiety and just trying to exist as an independent person.

And then there's Gortash.

Y'all, I didn't go in planning that one. At all. Not a bit. Maeve was my second playthrough and I was like Gortash is fine, sure. It wasn't until I started reading others' works, especially @mightymizora, that I took a moment to think about well what would it for them to have worked together? And here we are, me fully Gort pilled. Their relationship was less transformative than Astarion's but really important because he was her first attempt to break out. She can't remember it, but I do think that her almost escape is in her brain somewhere, deep in there, and the fact that she can't remember is what lets her try it again, this time more successfully. Gortash would have put her in a new cage and instead she finally freed herself.

And for those of you still here, this is Aglaeca, my first roleplay character ever, my beloved bitch noble, ice queen of my heart.

The family resemblance (aka I like goth girls)

[thegeminisage]

STAR TREK UPDATE TIME. last night we watched voy's "scorpion part i" and "the gift." I HAVE FINALLY MET SEVEN OF NINE

scorpion part ii:

ABSOLUTELY loved this one. idk why i was so surprised when seven turned out to be their borg liaison like i had no idea how they encountered her...i guess i was picturing them picking her up like a lost puppy because of hugh in tng

seven hot it must be said. we haven't gotten into the meat of it yet but i do like her. i was a little worried that after all this i wouldn't!

janeway dealing with the borg was sooo fun. literally her no-nonsense take-no-shit mode

i loved also that chakotay was the one to essentially borg meld with seven since he'd had the prior experience...mwah. give him a little borg trauma as a treat

i also really enjoyed janeway and chakotay realizing that seven was right - their fighting and going against each other is why they were losing. what if our future third reminded us that we needed to renew our wedding vows and we were both lost in space?

ESPECIALLY BECAUSE. like on what could have been her deathbed while she was slurring her words she made chakotay promise to do the thing. and immediately he decided to do the opposite even though it broke his heart. like SO TRUE they needed the reminder mom and dad were literally fighting

i have mixed feelings about janeway sort of forcing the detransition from borg onto seven. like yeah no human person wants to be borg especially not the little girl she was when she was assimilated but it's very hard to hear and ignore her wishes NOW when she's stating them so clearly, and when she's so obviously suffering. like i don't think she could have done any different or that i would have done any different but whew! rough

i also think chakotay was SICK with jealousy that tuvok got to go into the cube with janeway and he had to stay out on voyager. i bet tuvcok was so smug about it. idk why but it brings me so much joy to imagine them hating each other and as an extent maybe also fighting over janeway's affection, be it platonic or not

also, i can't remember if this was in this episode or the next one but the bit where seven was in her cell fucking SCREAMING na janeway was behind her grabbing her...sincerely hoping the dyke energy only gets better from here cuz that was gay as hell

the gift:

rip kes...i'll miss you

ik kes left bc they were having difficulties with the actress, but it still sucks that her exit was so dumb. like oh no her powers are going out of control and even though we fixed it every other time this time we can't! anyway bye!

i do appreciate the actresses crying for what felt like...you know, for real, during the goodbye. i almost welled up with them. and ten years closer to home!!! that's 13 years down, 57 to go...

kes is such a rare person in the voyager cast because she has so many connections. she's good friends with tom, she's gort tuvok and the emh as her mentors, janeway as like her fake mom, neelix as her romantic interest...she's connected to so many people. if you name anybody from the rest of the cast you'd get 2-3 connections at most. so it's sad to see her go

and like i hated neelix when he was with kes but their goodbye conversation was so lame. i still can't believe that's all we ever got about their breakup. fucking crazy

on the other hand, seven in this episode was so good, especially with like, b'elanna - her disdain and her sarcasm are useless against b'elanna who can dish it back out just as well and does not give one shit about seven's deal so long as she gets the ship working again. also? lots of women on screen during that scene. let's lez out.

and seven at the end remembering her favorite color :( i was surprised she relented in her willingness to be aboard so quickly - but it just shows that janeway genuinely did get through to her somehow. WOMEN!!!

TONIGHT: ds9's "a time to stand" and "rocks and shoals"