#am i even a writer anymore
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So… I have never written a Stranger Things fanfic, or even a fanfic (beyond a very vague prompt) in over seven years. But, I haven’t been able to get this idea out of my head.
Edit: I have started writing a fanfic on this premise! Part 1
Eddie, who his whole life has thought himself a coward. Who only knows to run, to hide, to lie his way out of every situation. The Munson name is not something you live up to, is something you live in spite of. Back from the dead, recovering from literal hell.
An Eddie who doesn’t know how to explain to Hellfire how or why he became friends with no other than Steve Harrington.
Eddie who hasn’t realized that what he has been doing so far wasn’t running away, it was surviving. Hide the drugs. Hide the weirdness. Hide his sexuality. Hide himself. So when one day, Garrett asks him why the hell are they holding Hellfire for the second time in a month in the Harrington residence, he doesn't think for a second before lying through his teeth.
"Look, man, I know Harrington is an asshole, but I am taking one for the team here. Do we or do we not have a big enough space for campaigns now? And the King even comes with amenities!" All sarcastic, holding the juice box Steve had laid out with the rest of the snacks.
And he meant it as he did most things, a way to hide who Eddie Munson is and protect himself. Except he knew he had fucked up big time the moment Dustin looked furious, but he wasn't looking at him; he was looking behind him. And there was only one force strong enough in this side of the world that could keep Dustin Henderson quiet.
And sure enough, as soon as Eddie turned around he could see Steve Harrington standing behind him, a tray full of nachos in his hands. He looked as calm and collected as ever, even a smile on his face. But Eddie knew that look and that face. It was his Family Video pose. It was his retail worker face. He had never looked at him like that before.
And Steve Harrington, who had learned to trust in the last three years those who he never thought he would. The Steve Harrington who had become the forever babysitter, and now felt more comfortable with a bat full of nails than with a basketball. A Steve Harrington, former swim captain, who now only got in the water if it meant saving someone else. A Steve Harrington who had worked so hard to leave The King behind and become Steve.
The same one who, once he find out Eddie Munson was one of them now, had received him like one of their own. A brother in arms, of sort. A friend, for sure.
Just smiled his customer smile, set the nachos down and said, “That comes free of charge, Munson. No need to pretend to be friends. Please lock the door on your way out.” And just turned to leave.
Steve had never joined a single session of Hellfire, but had started sitting in and listening to the stories, at the children’s insistence. Now, he turned around and left.
Both Dustin and Eddie made to stand up and go after him, but Mike’s voice stopped them. “Let him leave, he doesn’t like the game either way. Let’s just finish this”. And to Eddie’s surprise, the boy’s voice is full of venom directed solely at him.
Dustin turns to Mike and after a short silent conversation just sits back down, not turning back to Eddie.
Steve doesn’t come back. Eddie and the other teens are thrown out almost as soon as the game is over, only the Party staying behind.
….
I am not really sure what comes next. But my guess is Steve plays his part, a gracious Host who is doing Okay. No, he’s not hurt and the kids can stop worrying. And Eddie believes him. Wants to ask for forgiveness still, explain the situation. But Steve was the King of Hawkins, and not for nothing. He will play his part to perfection, while giving Eddie 0 chance to talk to him alone. They are Not Friends, and he needs to come to terms with that (Steve or Eddie or both). So yeah. Maybe I writes maybe I don’t. If someone knows of a ff similar please let me know.
If you read this far thank you. Also, I am sorry.
#steddie#eddie munson#steve harrington#stranger things#steve x eddie#i might write this#who knows#am i even a writer anymore#jwritessometimes
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Scholarly peak is catching up on recent literature
#bingqiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#svsss#sqq#lbh#my art#which is honestly just to say that i've finished the other two print books i was reading#and am now prepared to leap feet first into svsss bk4#i succeeded in holding off for an entire two weeks. i have the conviction of a wet paper towel.#lets see bk4 was described as - what? - an ''angst and smut pile''??#i am very much looking forward to this#i was promised a story with my snake boy#because i am very much not over zhuzhi-lang's fate so this had better be A REALLY NICE HAPPY ONE FOLKS#anyway have sqq and lbh cuddling and reading as i project on them#i like to assume that as time goes on sqq is able to relax his persona a bit more around lbh#i think he should get to cuddle and bitch about shitty novels#but man sqh is really the ONLY source of any books that have an even slightly modern cadence/style i have a feeling sqq would be very keen#though if i'm being honest i really wonder if sqh could ever bring himself to write fiction again#if you're A Writer it tends to be hard to RESIST you just get an itch to tell a story#but also like... the fear that all of this could happen again... or that the characters you're creating might be REAL and SUFFERING...#yeah... i honestly suspect he can't write anymore and that it honestly probably sucks a lot... but for the sake of this joke he is :P
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My favourite interaction from last night.
Guys....am I Shang Qinghua?????
(I'm ashamed to say that these were just my natural reactions, it was not, as they say, for the bit. I do just have four emotions ((that one doesn't make much sense if you weren't there)))
#four being a dumbass#guys#what even am I anymore#guys am I SQH#I'm a good writer#but in all other ways#I'm him aren't I???#Sorry I've been having an existential crisis over this#scum villian self saving system#ren zha fanpai zijiu xitong#scum villain#svsss#shang qinghua#airplane shooting towards the sky
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WHAT.
#...#GGGHHHHH NO#Holy MISLEADING batman#That BETTER BE A LIE#IT BETTER BE A LIE#otherwise I am a 1000 times better writer#and can think of 1000 better things#and have thought of this timeline more already than you have doofus#You CAN'T BAIT ME WITH A GOOD TIME LIKE THAT#yeah it BETTER BE A LIE#otherwise ALL of the possible scenarios and theories in my brain were better#I don't even know if I care anymore lol#If this is so badly thought out that this is true I'm done man lol (slight exaggeration)#What THE FUCK does Rain have to do with Neo Sweden then?? That at least better be interesting. Oh and HOW is 12 “the same age”???#Ggghhhhhhhj#Yeah THATS RIGHT I'm fandom vagueposting in the tags bc I'm that mad#I've never done that before#SIR I AM TAKING AWAY CUSTODY of your intellectual property#It is mine now I will treat it better :3#And be MORE FUCKING CREATIVE#g gundam thoughts#Okay I might be overreacting because it's 5 am and they FUCKING blorbo baited me#and also this is the most damn predictable thing so if it were this predictable then why be coy???#Why make it sound like it might be convoluted and interesting???#my rants
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wishing that the hype for sonic 3 would just die already because im tired of hearing about it vs knowing that the suffering wouldnt truly be over because theyre talking about making a fourth movie . hell on earth
#sorry i was keeping my haterisms to myself for a while there but im still a hater regardless#well i havent actually watched it so maybe its not That bad but what im hearing about it certainly doesnt make it seem good either ........#i liked the first two movies but i simply do not trust these writers to adapt the characters and stories i love anymore#anyway i would say i wish we could just move on to the next sonic thing and forget about the movies#but i also know that no new sonic media release could ever overshadow a new movie#which is also annoying the fact that the movies get so much more attention than other sonic media frustrates me for many reasons#and like. i try to curate my online experience or whatever people call it i blakclisted most tags related to the movie#but it still feels like its everywhere even then both online and offline#help i just remembered that i got a big spike in followers immediately after the movie came out#and i havent really siad anything negative about the movie since then . um. looks around all scared#not that i think i shouldnt be allowed to have a different opinion or am scared of offending anyone#i just know a lot of sonic movie fans get weird about criticism from game fans and i dont feel like dealing with that
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talking about SteveNat is always a bizarre experience because I probably cannot be clearer about the fact that I ship them and want them to kiss on the mouth and yet whenever a post moves out of my orbit it immediately morphs into "yeah they're such good friends, I love a brotp."
#it's my bizarre superpower to LOSE readers whenever I write shipfic but applied to posts#I am probably one of the only writers in fandom who would be way more popular if I wrote gen#and I know this because my numbers on gen (like wake morning and yonder) are significantly higher than my numbers on shipfic#I don't get them frequently anymore -- home doesn't tend to pick up this kind of reader and it's my one REALLY shippy fic --#but you would be SHOCKED at the number of comments I got on gambit and even backbone wishing the ship wasn't there#or saying that they skipped all the ship scenes#gambit whatever people hate the ot3 this is the least of gambit's problems#I do not on the other hand understand how people read backbone and came to the conclusion that the kanan/hera was incidental#as a result I always feel really really guilty when I write shipfic#and part of me will always wonder if things like home and horizon wouldn't be better fics#if I hadn't been so self-indulgent as to put in the ships#not just better received but better fics period#:/#adventures in accountability#bedlam watches the mcu#talking about feedback in public
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i'm sorry. i have kept quiet about this for so so so long. but i can't any longer. i'm just sorry.
if you call buck "evan" you don't understand him as a character. if you call buck "evan" you don't understand the show.
the minute someone refers to buck as "evan" they are immediately telling on themselves.
#and i don't necessarily mean like once in a blue moon. i mean like calling buck#“evan” in text posts or writing from his pov in fics and writing “evan”#god even writing from someone else's pov and constantly referring to him as “evan”#and yeah this counts for writing from tommy's pov too and only using evan as a name for him.#remember when we all understood that buddie fic writers/shippers that had eddie calling buck evan all the time were just so wrong?#and now so many people are just out here being like “evan this” “evan that”#who is that? who are you talking about?#I AM GONNA NEED EVERYONE TO TAKE A STEP BACK WATCH THE SHOW AND REEVALUATE THEIR LIFE#anyways yeah i have just been biting my tongue and i couldn't do it anymore#.text
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"We need not look anywhere but to the eyes of our Savior for our true identity, an identity which is profoundly complex, unfathomable, deep as the sea, and yet can be boiled down to one little word: beloved. That's it. And that's why it's so silly (and perilous) to use your gifting to clothe yourself with meaning. Those clothes will never quite fit.
I once heard someone suggest that in the new creation, the work of our hands will at last be equal to what we were able to imagine. But in the meantime, living as we do in dying bodies in a dying world, our best work always falls short of the initiating vision. Toil and trouble, thistle and thorn, we push through the brush and come out bloody on the other side, only to realize we've ascended a false peak. It's difficult, yes. But it doesn't change a thing about who we are."
-Andrew Peterson, Adorning the Dark
#i stole this book from my dad (who has been an andrew peterson fan practically since i've been alive) and I'm having SUCH a time#i think it's especially difficult for people whose livelihoods are artistic in nature not to find their identity in the work of their hands#you pour so much of yourself into your work that it's difficult not to#(especially with the modern world's fixation on identity)#case in point: i'm a writer but when i fall into writing slumps i start to panic a bit because AM i a writer anymore? if i'm not a writer#what even am i? which isn't a healthy place to be#anyway just rambling a bit this book has me thinking in all the best ways#quotes#andrew peterson
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actually kills me every time i start losing my mind over a ship only to find out they have no fans and i can’t binge read incredible fan fictions or metas on them for days on end.
#nikolina#my first OTP 😢#alinej#omgggg they never leave my brain#percy x reyna#percy x jason#dont even get me started on themmmmm#like perachel is everything to me but they actually havr a following#i can never find anything on the other two#princess mechanic#when they were close they were CLOSE#clarke x echo#the writers knew theyd be too powerful together so they made them “enemies” over a man ☹️#inej x linnea#SO. MANY. HEADCANONS.#like stop shipping her with dunyasha !!! nina is also right there !!!!!#kendra x buffy#i am UNWELL#i need everything to be about them !!!!!#thominho#like yea newtmas is good but COME ONNNN#they said i love you 😭😭😭#also#brenda x thomas#13 year old me almost died over them#serena x nate#only skimmed the latest season cos i couldnt be bothered anymore why does chuck get to be happy 😭😭#if u have any recommendations pls lmk im STARVING 🙏🙏#quakerider#OMG the writers legit gave daisy the best love interest and then WROTE HIM OF
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touya dying and endeavor living with basically zero consequences IS wild tho
#dabi#touya todoroki#like all the league dying presumably because hori couldn't figure out how to redeem them but makes us watch a full redemption#for a dude that practiced eugenics on his kids and beat and raped his wife was certainly a narrative choice#and not once but TWICE did a child abuser get redemption#writer to writer I really am so curious why chisaki was saved but not touya shiggy or toga#who are arguably more popular and narratively important overall#so many extremely strange decisions going on in this ending I can't even be depressed anymore I'm just confused
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Season 4 and 5 made it just so difficult to truly believe that Marinette really loves her Kitty. The Fandom and show can scream about vague soft eyes and "she loves her kitty so muuuuuuch! <3" however they want, but it says alot about Marinette's character that this vague "I love my kitty" never really gets any more specific.
Saying "I like you / I want you around" doesn't mean anything whne the actions themselves paint the picture of her basically taking Cat Noir for granted and not thinking a single second about his actual well being or his perspective in any of this.
It's like in Glaciator 2 where a good part of the episode Marinette spends either screaming at Cat, manhandling him however she pleases and even invalidating any of his emotions by screaming in his face that HIS emotions don't matter in any of this, this is about HER and her only when she used him not knowing Marinette is Ladybug against him by secretly forcing him to practice with her her confession for Adrien.
She's literally screaming at him that his emotions are irrelevant to her. She just wants him to do whatever she wants and however she wants it bc apparently thats the only way she can stand being around him. And that she got in season 5, how Lovely.
And then later when Cat voices that he thinks Ladybug can't stand him anymore because she screams at him and gets seriously physical Marinette is like "No, no, that doesn't mean she hates you <3"
When, like, yes Marinette. Under anything resembling to normal morality you constantly reducing him to a rag doll, screaming, insulting, replacing him, leaving him behind on the battle field for your own and your friends' benefit and brushing him off would be a perfectly reasonable thing for another person to view as a bad thing. Only YOU would demand of someone to view that as unparalleled depictions of fondness, and that hasn't changed much by Elation.
Her ignoring his discomfort in the kissing scene (closing her eyes again) and then almost turning into Cat's enemy for daring to tell her "no" one time is one unnerving sight to behold. She basically immediately went back to season 4 mode the moment she didn't get what she wanted. I don't even want to imagine what she would have done to him by impulse if that moment had happened in Ladynoir (I hate how CONSISTENT this is...)
and even by the end of the episode she's still only asking him to validate her when he brings her back.
And well, then she leaves.
It's difficult to actually believe that Marinette really values Cat Noir alot. It feels much more like she values and likes how little genuine efforts she has to make in their dynamics to reach a normal standard, and that he's just the most convenient person for her regarding any kind of ugly dirty work or her worst tendencies not coming with regular circumstances. So of course she would like that.
If I had an anger problem, I would probably like the person too who had to learn from me that that's "perfectly reasonable behavior" they should view as GOOD in a dynamic bc i like using them as rag doll, punching bag and tool.
But just because I personally would find comfort in a person accepting that I can do that to them as my way of "showing affection" doesn't it mean that that's a good thing to make soft eyes about.
But the show is not GIVING us much more to work with. Marinette only on rare occasions voices anything she even likes about him. It goes mostly unsaid so you can claim whatever you want about her feelings for him.
She likes that he's funny, only that the show isn't showing that alot. If at all. Marinette telling Alya in Hack-San to laugh at his jokes because he likes taht is kinda out of left field because Marinette herself honestly doesn't do it alot. The normal reaction is her being annoyed, shutting him up and even insulting him, down to any kind of "slapstick".
And the most I can remember her having SAID about being in love with him in season 5 was being thirsty about how hot he is. I don't wanna be mean but no wonder Alya basically disregarded Marinette's crush. It's not like she ever named anything serious, and tahts....honestly awful.
With Adrien as Cat Noir there was NEVER a question if he values her for more than her being pretty. He loves her brilliant mind, her determination, her drive to help people. Him complimenting her for being pretty was just the cherry on top.
But only towards Joan of Arc did she mention that she likes his loyalty, but that got ruined by her straight up AGREEING with her whne she insulted Cat and the "loyal" part was only to save her own face. She literally agreed with someone insulting Cat right in front of him and only said "yeah, but he's LOYAL" which of course made him insecure. He couldn't see Joan of Arc, how many people are there and what the insult was Ladybug just agreed with. He can't defend himself and saw that Ladybug literally WON'T.
So which one is it, Marinette? Is he hot or a runt who's lucky he's loyal? Why was Joan's opinion of you the whole episode the only thing you actually cared about to the point where you were fine with throwing the person you love oh so much to the dogs again? And Cat looking bad and humiliated again was barely an afterthought to you, as long as it wasn't YOU?
If she actually loves and value him then why is she still treating him as if he merely spawns into existence for akumas or her entertainment and benefit as her care taker? Why isn't Marinette trying to make up for how she used her civilian side to make him do whatever she wants several times by now, as if she never even conciders how this will look like once they reveal (I would loose sleep if I did that to a person!)?
Why was she still perfectly fine with him being completely isolated and having no one in a case of emergency, meaning she always continued letting him run the risk of ending up the way he did in the season 5 finale? Cat being found as a civilian by Hawkmoth was from day 1 one of the most obvious things that could happen and even after 2 what if episodes this fate of his was never actually avoided, because Marinette always just prioritized getting HERSELF out of the equation more than him truly being safe.
That's a risk she was apparently from start til the end perfectly willing to take.
5 entire seasons and the only safety thing she cared about in their dynamic is that if he gets caught and is at the villain's mercy, he does so as quietly as possible so she isn't bothered by it and can close her eyes, cover her ears and go "Lalala".
If Marinette in any of these 5 seasons thought Cat deserved help too than she sure never acted like it, and in fact demanded the complete opposite for her own comfort.
How am I supposed to believe that Marinette loves and values Cat Noir as a person when non of that or his entire personhood goes beyond what little she wants for her own comfort? If you love a person you would actually want them save and not remain in harms way but accept that you shouldn't be asked to care about that? Or remain completely isolated in the dangerous lives you lead without being allowed to ask muvb of anything from you support wise?
Or constantly ditched on the battle field, being done who knows what to so YOU and your friends are fine while you execute the actual plan with the others.
You would ask questions if they're okay and if they need help too, and not just take any half an indicator your being given to write off any concern because you apparently don't actually wanna think about any of that.
You would actually think about them in any decision you make because this is not just about you and their well being should mean something to you. You would tell them things so you don't risk them getting hurt by having to find out themselves the worst way (and here leading to akumatizations).
You would let them made their own choices, have agency and not just when you're forced to. You wouldn't casually execute a plan to trick them into revealing their important secret identitiy to two people without their consent or knowledge, and ESPECIALLY not when the god damn angry authority figure, who already doesn't lie your partner, would fucking use it to get rid of them behind YOUR BACK TOO.
You wouldn't want physical harm being done to them instead of even being a main source of it, and never taking accountability for that while demanding to never get touched and spoken to in a single wrong way. You wouldn't want that they accept that you don't owe them anything as their LEADER but they owe you EVERYTHING because you said so and can't handle anything else in a "partnership".
(Only to feel sorry about it for 2 minutes when you loose everyone else but, well, not really I guess? Or else she would have tried making up for it in season 5 more than just surface level stuff that was once again mostly for HER benefit anyway. But more than that never happened)
You wouldn't want to think they're stupid for not thinking like you and draw the line at any "back talking" you're being given bc you apparently concider anything else but absolut obedience and blind faith as your little puppet as you being "disrespected". So they must walk around you like on eggshells and only talk in soft compliments and supportive words cause who knows how you would react otherwise?
Dude, no wonder Ladynoir is fucking dead. Good for Adrien, and I hate that we've come THIS far. Such a thing is one of the last things I ever wanted to say when I started watching the show. Now I can't be angry taht Ladynoir is fucking dead and Cat Noir didn't made it out of the partnership for the finale, because wtf else was this supposed to result in??
I just cannot fathom the type of "Love" and fondness Marinette supposedly has for Cat Noir. Whatever fondness she feels for him gets drowned out by other 20 red flags about her not actual treating him like a real person.
And man, I HATE that...
Yeah, literally. This is probably harsher than what I think, but it's more or less my thoughts on the matter.
Thank you for your ask!
#ML Salt#ML Critical#ML Writing Salt#ML Writers Salt#Marinette Salt#Asks#Meta#Ladynoir conflict#Ladynoir Salt#Also anon I am so so so sorry for being so late#This is like 2 months late#Anon you're probably not even here anymore but I didn't forget you I promise
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There's something that always bothers me about people saying "Barbara going back to being disabled" doesn't matter if it's positive, negative, or neutral. It's the "going back" part because it's just not true. She wouldn't be going back, she would just be without assistive medical technology.
In the closest real-life example, not everyone who uses similar technology is considered "cured" as the removal of the device would mean they are no longer enabled. In only a few cases have I ever seen "cured" but that's potentially dependent on injury/cause of disability where it was possible the device just made recovery easier and there are many different causes to SCIs/paralysis/similar conditions. Others have no chance of recovery but have a chance of being enabled. But still not fully becoming an able-bodied person. Even some of the ones who recovered their ability to walk were still limited in what they were capable of (and therefore still disabled)
So honestly now, it's just coming to me how bad representation the chip is of similar realistic treatment and disabled people who use that treatment. Before anyone is like "But Barbara's isn't real" I know that, but now I'm literally seeing people say the same shit about REAL PEOPLE who have had nearly THE SAME TREATMENT because they're letting poor representation in a comic book determine how they view this course of medical treatment.
TLDR: No Barbara Gordon wouldn't "go back" to being disabled without the chip. Writers and fans aren't good at writing disability and it shows
#I'm pretty sure the only one that has 'guaranteed' by it's own claim to be a cure is Neuralink which is Elon Musk so.....#take of that what you will#barbara gordon#oracle#batfamily#batfam#batman#dc comics#Like I'm reading legitimate research articles about this and in only a few cases has 'cure' been used to describe the process#also why am I reading research articles? well if comic writers aren't going to be nerds anymore someone has to be lol#but really who's surprised a bunch of people don't give an actual shit about disability even when they pretend to#not my disabled ass that's for sure#disability#actually disabled#actually I should say the only other things calling similar tech 100% cures even if the chip were to be removed are also clickbait#I feel like I shouldn't have to mention that but really I do
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#cat creech#cat creech is my vent tag i think. block it if you don’t want my venting#venting in these tags pls ignore this post if you don’t want to read vent#I feel like I don’t care about stories enough. I don’t read books watch movies or shows#the games I play I’ve already played before or have no story at all. I feel childish and trapped in familiarity#if I could slightly different versions of the same story over and over again I’d be happy. I don’t need stories at all it seems.#I even avoid it often. would opt for comedy or something baseless over a story.#and I wouldn’t be upset over this if I didn’t major in animation#I don’t want to be a director I don’t want to be a writer I don’t want to be in charge of story#but this stupid fucking school makes you do every part of the pipeline. I don’t read or watch anything so unsurprisingly my story is boring#my story for my thesis I mean. it’s uninspiring I’m not proud of it. and it’s changed so much from where it was in the beginning#it doesn’t even feel like mine anymore. I don’t like it and it’s not mine. I don’t want anything to do with it#and I think I realized that being a storyteller means having lessons to tell people or experiences to share#I don’t have either of those things. my life is uninteresting and I don’t learn from my mistakes. my mistakes themselves are boring#all my issues are boring and privileged. no one needs a story or lesson from me. what the fuck can I say that hasn’t been said#and even if I did have a story to tell I don’t want to? I don’t care to teach people or share my experience. that’s never been what art-#-was about for me. art is a selfish escape for me. nothing more. nothing artsy feely or intellectual. ‘why do you draw’ idk it’s fun#I remember old classes where people answered why theyre artists. everyone had interesting answers and here i was-#- I said because it’s fun. like a fucking childish moron. never should have pursued art as a job. you have to want to be an artist to make-#a living from it. I don’t want to be an artist. I just am one as a byproduct of drawing. not the same thing.#I don’t even want to fucking animate anymore. I don’t know what the fuck happened to me but I hate it I hate it so much#I miss when making art wasn’t a task or a job or homework. I really fucking do#I’m tearing up#anyway#weasel speaks#vent
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personal rant incoming bc i yap like it’s no one’s business
#OKAY SO. not to sound like a broken record on repeat but wow for some reason i can’t get myself to write#and it’s really annoying and unfortunate bc i REALLY want to i really do like i HAVE the ideas and everything#i think the issue lies in not knowing HOW i want to write it?#and i’m not scared of writing but idk what it is… like why has it taken me MONTHS to ‘write’ ???#am i afraid of writing or something??? am i nervous about it??? what is it#and i’m the type of person who has SO many ideas when it comes to suguru but when i open up that doc… BRAINFOG#and sigh like i really wanna be proud of my writing from here on out!#i like my writing it’s okay i’m pretty ambivalent towards it like i have no strong feelings#but i WANT strong feelings!!!!! i want to create something where i myself as a reader & writer are INVESTED in it#i feel like w my writing i’m REALLY lacking when it comes to atmosphere/show don’t tell/dialogue/descriptions etc…#and i always say that but i also don’t know how to create THAT type of vibe in my stories#and for cult leader geto specifically i have a vague idea of what i want like i know my ending and decently know my middle#but the beginning is whooping me and sigh. i don’t wanna keep rewriting it#and then w premonition of love i’m proud that i created an outline but like . even w that i have NO idea of how to write it#sighhhhhhhh. and i gave myself self-imposed deadlines last year that i certainly did not keep 😭#but i REALLY wanna keep these ones… methinks it’s the only way i can progress w my writing#sigh part 2 . idk i just needed to get this out here for myself NDNDNDNDNDND#anyways. last iced pumpkin chai of the season in hand i need to go HAM or whatever idgaf anymore 😭😭😭#personal
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reblog for sample size!
#poll#polls#tumblr polls#fanfiction poll#fanfiction#fic writers#i am very curious for the following reason:#i started writing a fic#and out of fucking nowhere#my brain decided it wanted it to be 1st person#even though i used to say that 1st person pov in fics is cringe as hell#so i dont know anymore i think i went through a paradigm shift
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I HATE GEGE AKUTAMI
#pack it up everyone funs over#what if we all drop jjk#and pretend it was a social experiment#or collective hallucination#idk bro i just hate this manga so much rn 😭😭😭#the way its 1 am alredy and i can't go to sleep because my mind is too busy hating#what if we just all kill ourselves idk#can sukuna kill everyone alredy so this damn series can finally be over PLEASE#like#what even is the point anymore#words could never describe how much i hate this#AND I HAVE NO ONE TO TALK TO ABOUT THIS#the way that#entré a twitter#y lo primero que vi fue a gojo con puntos#Y TODO LO QUE DIJERON SOBRE EL VIENTO SOPLANDO Y DESCUBRIENDO SU FRENTE PARA MOSTRAR LOS PUNTOS#ERA CIERTO CTM#y ni siquiera fue kenjaku#TENIA QUE SER YUTA WEON#alguien dijo q a este punto parece que gege esta sacando material de teorías de tik tok#para continuar la historia#Y ES TAN CIERTO#AT THIS POINT THE BEST ENDING WE CAN HOPE FOR IS ONE IN WHICH EVERYONE IS DEAD AND THAT'S NOT EVEN A JOKE#all of this just to save megumi#AND THEN WHAT BRO IS GOING TO WAKE UP AND EVERYONE WILL BE DEATH#anyways#rant#jjk261#jjk#when i enter a worst writer competition and my oponent is gege akutami himself or smth like that idk
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