#am i a fucking joke to you Dan and Phil?

[mybraindumpsterfire]

Us: Please do a ‘Week in the Life’ video, please pretty please 🙏

Dan and Phil: Mmmm… Funko Pop Game? 😋

[danandfuckingjonlmao]

joking about suicide: bad for your mental health, boring, predictable, overdone, harmful, triggering, encourages self hatred

joking about phanicide: gets to the heart of the issue, empowering, homophobic but in a fun way, warranted, justified, ethically permissible

[everybody-hit-the-pyro-cue]

im going to cry this is actually healing me

[emotoangel]

okay I’m going on a little ineffable phannie rant read at your own gut wrenching discretion bc I can’t lie this shit’s about to get parasocial

because it’s not just Dan and Phil dressed as Crowley and Aziraphale, is it?

it’s Dan and Phil, who have struggled with their sexualities for years. closeted, faced every speculation under the sun when it comes to their own sexualities, the other’s sexuality, their relationship, their legitimacy, if they’re queerbaiting or not, being OUT. OUT and dressed as two canonically gay men in love with each other, two men who would see the world burn to know the other was safe. two men who helped stop the end of the world so they could be together.

a man who is bitter and cold and a little bit bad (but not evil I would say, though he might try to make you believe he is) and a man who is love and light and exclusively good (or so he’d like you to believe). and am I talking about Dan and Phil there, or am I talking about Crowley and Aziraphale?

it’s about these two men who, even 5 years ago, feared the word ‘gay’. it’s about how Dan, Mr Commitmentphobe, Mr I Can’t Even Commit To A Pet, Mr Soulmates Are Not A Thing That Exist, bought a costume, and sprayed (or, fucking hell god help me DYED) his hair red, and posted a cute picture of him and his ranch partner/4000 year old tortoise/companion through life/actual soulmate and TAGGED IT INEFFABLE HUSBANDS.

it’s a couples costume!!! it’s impossible for it not to be, considering they are two of the most well known canonically in love gay men on the internet right now!! it’s a thank you to their little phannies online who make them feel safe and comfortable enough to do what they do every day. and it’s a shoutout to the progress they have made in 15 years. a ‘hey, we’re here, we’re happy and gay and (in love) together’. and that’s SOO SPECIAL. ITS SO SPECIAL. and it means everything!!!!

AND ITS NOT EVEN JUST THE ONE PHOTO.

it’s the selfie on the story of them cute and couply and drinking the aziracrow drinks and looking happy and in love 😭

AND DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON CAT AND BEAR SAVE THE WORLD VS HOWLEY AND AZIRAPHIL ARE HERE TO SAVE THE WORLD

anyway basically I’m so insanely proud of them, feeling very parasocial about the progress they’ve made in 15 years to get to a point where they’re comfortable enough to make phwedding jokes and gay jokes and jokes about both being switches and furries and in love. feeling so proud of them being out and proud and gay and in love and also I have a good omens tattoo so I’m choosing to believe they did this for me personally thank you x

[jonsaremembers]

SOME SALT LAKE TITTY OBSERVATIONS UNDER THE CUT IF YOU ARE SPOILERS AVERSE

they had a food truck there called Taco Daddy and I am convinced dipnpip did that on fucking purpose

so long london was playing when we came in, the second to last song was HOT TO GO! and doing the dance was the happiest I have ever been UNTIL TOXIC CAME ON AND WE ALL SCREAMED

Dan uttered the phrase "recalibrated the bond between us" and gestured to phil

In their little speech at the top of the show they mentioned Phil had never been to Utah before, said they'd tried fry sauce and learned what soaking was

this unfortunately led to A LOT OF FUCKING SOAKING JOKES including with sister daniel's bathwater

including that linguist dr phil helped old ladies soak and cum, which seemed to genuinely catch them off guard to the point that phil ran to cover it with his card

lawyer dan banned lesbians

"If you're in this room right now you're gonna be banished to the outer darkness"

Conspiracies were vegas, clothes, tourbus and pumpkin man

Dan said "you're true, that is right" to phil at one point by accident (carried it off like a champ of course but I did notice it hehe)

No real mention of yesterday except that it was the anniversary of their meeting

Kath mention in the boxing insults

When they took a selfie with us at the end Dan said "three two one soaking!"

[pseudophan]

ok so i don’t even go here but i have know OF dan and phil forever and i need to make it clear, i have never actually watched their videos but i do know that they came out a few years back. so today on a whim i decided to watch that birthday stream and holy shit i always thought y’all were just delusional freaks (no offense) but like they’re like actually in love. ive been making fun of y’all for YEARSSSSSS for being delusional i am so sorry 😭 i am also sorry that i had to sit through that weird ass homo erotic catholic role play….is that a normal occurrence from them orrrr??????

LMFAOOOOOOO see this is exactly the thing, i am fully aware that from the outside we do look fucking insane like that's honestly fair cause we sure do act like it but if you look into it it's... they're a lot... i will admit today was over the top even for them, like the catholic roleplay is new (except for this masterpiece) and i'm not quite sure what to do about it

but as for the in love part they're just like that always. it's actually exhausting. the third wheeling i experience during every video is intense, especially since they came out cause while they're still pretending to pretend like they're Just Besties (kind of an in-joke at this point) they generally don't give a fuck and so we get to see just the sweetest interactions imaginable and it's great and horrible at the same time

don't get me wrong we're still freaks, just not delusional ones

[simplydnp]

Hii as a passive fan looking in from sidelines, I read something along the lines that Dan and Phil did come out like few weeks apart but they haven’t confirmed or denied that they are in a relationship? I am confused as what is the official narrative from their side, can you clear this for me please.

I have no doubt of them being together just confused about official timeline, xx

dan and phil are embracing the ambiguity that is brought to them under the 'we know you know' mindset

you're correct in that they came out a few weeks apart (though, phil kind of did in his tweet supporting dan on the day dan came out)

it's funny you ask this, as we do have a recent answer to a reporter about their relationship:

this is the first time they've really been asked this since coming out, but it's important to note the context here: they're talking to a new zealand reporter, about their tour. to me, it reads as an aggressive fuck off signal to the media. ie, this topic is off-limits. so 'officially' their stance is that their lives are private.

unofficially? there's a year's worth of dapg videos that carry heavy implications. it's a lot of reading between the lines, it's a lot of interpreting jokes, it's a lot of paying attention to things both Said and not said. from explicit sex jokes to earnest moments to even specific games they've played, it's easy for an audience to pick up the clues because we're looking for them--cause dan and phil tend to put them there for us. it is important to note that there has been a significant change in tone of the gaming videos from the past vs the gaming videos now. while the language and the types of jokes have changed, so has the dynamic--in the best way possible. they're much more free and relaxed on camera now, both an intentional choice and the result of being out for 5 years.

they've got a mortgage together, alright?

in terms of them not directly commenting on it--at least at this point, it just makes things easier. they aren't usually on tour so reporters aren't usually asking them these questions, but even beyond that, they're incredibly internet famous. even they themselves were surprised about quote "how many people were horny for dan and phil in 2024". and sure, it isn't the same numbers as pre-hiatus, but there's definitely still a lot of people here. so while we champion for a hard-launch (since they keep moving closer) we also know that it's bigger than just saying it. it would be everywhere. everyone would have something to say. and then it's not about the content anymore, it's the relationship (though, one would argue their chemistry makes the content, but i would say their connection adds to it, but isn't the commodity they specifically sell)

in terms of the timeline in particular, we're days away from 15 years of dan and phil, in that they filmed and posted pinof 1 in 2009 at the end of this week. they've never intentionally specified any other anniversary, so we don't know (though we have suspicions), but it's unlikely it took That long to get there. coming out was the next Biggest step, one could argue, and you're right about the timeline of weeks between videos. what i reckon that's important to note is that dan 'appeared' in a phil video surprisingly soon after june, despite not having made any other videos since christmas of the year before. even though it was just his voice, it was enough. there were 4 ish years of limited joint content between them, but it did happen (mostly stories and podcast style things), up until the return of dapg last october. since then, there's been regular dapg uploads (crazy phrase) and dan's either been directly in or mentioned in every single amazingphil video since the return. it depends how much you think implications and indirect phrasing are evidence/signifiers, but there's been a Lot that's come out of gaming videos in particular that Mean Things to the fans, but aren't something able to be captured by the media and ran with (though, one article did see the 'dan and phil are getting divorced' title and reported on it as if it were true, despite it just being an 'it takes two' video)

[fryday]

I know there were so much going on in the new mukbang video, but I feel like we need a deep dive into the whole "I don't want to not do this, but I also just want you to be happy...I didn't want you to do something that didn't feel right for you. You should always follow your dreams and heart" speech. Sacrificing the thing you love and bring you the most monetary income for the person you LOVE.. This right here is the hard launch. In this day and age (especially in the whole "influencer" world), people prioritize money, fame, recognition, views over anything. We literally see how many relationships were destroyed because of money. YET, Phil said this line to Dan in the first mukbang video so lovingly and wholeheartedly and still a 5-years hiatus later. Like...YOU are above everything else in my life. UGH. My heart literally combusted and my forever dried eyes literally shed real tears as I heard him say this. So many people are saying Phil is winning the idgaf war, when bro clearly has been giving way too many fucks about his little giant "buddy" in the past 15 years (and still counting).

I sent you an ask before and said that I feel like Dan spoils Phil so much in this new era. After watching this mukbang video, I would say Phil DESERVES to be treated like a tudor princess. If I were Dan, I would be like him too... like...you don't have to catch me when I faint or go to the hospital with me when I am literally half blind if you prioritize ME and my feelings in your life and willing to support and love me no matter what. :')

this is so true anon. so so true. the joke about phil being the king of winning the idgaf war is really really funny because he DOES handle dan's more "serious" issues in such a hilarious, matter-of-fact way, and it just makes for incredible memes.

but jokes aside, it's really just different ways of showing love. i feel like phil's love is an accepting love. it's the kind of love that you can fall on, the kind of love that takes you in as your whole self (flaws and oddities and all) and says "you belong here" anyway, "i'll support every part of you". and we know this was exactly where dan found his sanctuary at 18 years old when they first met. in the same vein, it's phil so many years later saying i want you to be happy, first of all. YOU, the human in my life, before the "you" that involves your job/career/public perception/etc.

so when people laugh about phil winning the idgaf war it's because phil won't fuss over dan or wax poetic about how the fated creation of ranch parallels the fated creation of dan and phil (not over it), and that's simply because phil doesn't seem to express his love by *putting it out*. he expresses his love by *taking in*. his love is in his acceptance.

on the flipside, i feel like dan is someone who puts his love out (ironic considering he's the "love isn't real" guy, but). he shows his love in the million and one little gestures (see: him basically making half of phil's drink in the phantasy cocktails video) and proclamations of love (see again: ranch parallels). so, as you said, it comes across in a more doting sort of manner - which is just. well it's adorable.

tl;dr - they love each other more than anyone could ever encapsulate in a tumblr ask + response, but in different equally valid ways.

[ashleyeveerson]

✨ THE DAN AND PHIL LORE pt. 3✨

CHECK OUT PART 2: https://www.tumblr.com/ashleyeveerson/760707933651746816?source=share

Phil ALSO comes out! (yeah no i'm not crying what? not them feeling comfortable enough to be themselves yeah). 2019 also brings us the adoption of a fish named Norman (a cutie) AND they also post pictures about their recent trip to Japan [the photo of Phil looking up to Dan behind the camera? yeah i am so normal about it, i swear]. There is hope in the horizon still for a Dan and Phil comeback...

BAM! A certain virus runs wild and forces everyone to stay at home. Phil continues to upload solo videos which distracted so many of us during these dark times. Dan, however is AWOL and the only pic we have of him is a shitty screenshot of him in glasses and a mask helping Phil rescue an injured pigeon (lockdown was WILD).

Also, my boy Dan post a cryptic tweet that leads to the announcement of a self-help book named YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS NIGHT (because you will <3). Nah but I can't count how many times I've sobbed reading it, just him trying to help out others who have also struggled with mental health... istg i love this man

Hey so THEY BUY THEIR FOREVER PHOUSE TOGETHER they're gonna kill me one day istg. "Dan and Phil just decided to pay a mortgage together", top 10 sentences that would kill a 2016 phan. They are slaying, they are glowing... also rip Norman the fish you will not be forgotten

So during 2014 the fates (aka a random youtuber) foretold that Dan and Phil would be married in 2022. Since that clearly didn't happen the meme PHIVORCE united the phandom once more. ALSO Dan is out there shitting on youtube (as he should) and going on his solo tour WE'RE ALL DOOMED! Which i love with all my heart and also Phil being there for him every step of the way... AHHHHHHHH

Anyways a certain video called Dan and Phil finally tell the truth hits the internet and let's just say GOD DAMN. This also starts a wonderful trend amongst Dan and Phil in which they make fun of their audience (we deserve it ngl) and absolutley SHOCK US with new information about bonkers shit from their past [apparently they were offered a threesome MULTIPLE TIMES???]

It's the end. They've decided to give up their channel "Dan and Phil Games" forever... let's take a moment and silent and mourn with a compilation of Heart eyes Howell

...

SIKE! We're back baby and we're better than ever!!! The goodbye video turned out the be an ANNOUNCEMENT of their comeback. They are back, Dil Howlter is here and Phil confesses to having dyed everything green in the house when Dan went on tour bc he missed him (OH GOD). Also, the Halloween baking video introduced us to the icon that is.... *drumroll please*

SISTER DANIEL, the queen of making everyone reconsider their sexuality... she is the moment, she is an icon and she is serving astronomical levels of cunt at all time [jokes aside, Dan being comfortable enough to do drag in public, fuck they've come so far i'm so proud of them <3].

And here we are in the future, it's present day and they are queerer and happier than ever. THE PICTURES I CAN'T ISTG. Also Dan's Birthday stream is beyond iconic. First of all my unproblematic kings make it a charity stream to donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund (using their public influence for good hell yeah)... And how did they raise the money you ask? WELL BY HITTING IS WHERE WE'RE WEAKEST. Sister Daniel makes a spectacular comeback, FATHER PHIL is introduced and Dan even dyes his hair red to be more Good Omens coded... which timeline are we living in again? like how is any of this real?

Also them drawing the PINOF whiskers on their faces again... they're literally growing old together I'm gonna go sob in a corner. Also the fake apology video bc they have no fashion sense in the Sims 4 is hilarious as fuck. HOW CAN THEY POSSIBLY BE SO MUCH HOTTER ON THEIR THIRTIES EXPLAIN??

anyways the phandom is still speculating wether they're erasing "i love you's" at the end of their text when they show them on videos... guess some things never change. Nah but the vibes are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT NOW, they are more open than they've ever been and participate on the phan culture FULLY to the point that they're the ones terrorizing us now.

QUICK DETOUR TO TALK ABOUT PHIL'S FAMOUS BAD LUCK (and then they wonder why he's always dying in the fanfics). Nah but my poor man has had his fair share of medical problems, the most recent being...

OH GOD WHY WOULD YOU ANNOUNCE SOMETHING LIKE THAT THIS WAY?? nah like using humor as a coping mechanism and all but do they wanna gives a heart attack?! iconic i fear however

So yeah the video where they talk about it is WILD (funniest shit about the whole ordeal is that a nurse mistook Dan as Phil's son). Also I saw a tweet speculating about Phil having a hickey like... first of all what is it? 2009? Second of all IT'S MOST LIKELY A POPPED VESSEL FROM LOSING ALL THAT BLOOD YOU KNOW

They still were able to go on their vacation (aka the rodent boy summer) which gifted us with this iconic pics... ALSO they dropped a new Dan and Phil beats for summer go check out the names of the tracks istg they wanna kill their fans.

Nothing is sacred anymore, they've infiltrated twtphan, they're actively reposting memes and writing fanfiction about themselves. It's the wild west, everytime you get a notification is like playing Russian Rulet. Cringe is dead and Dan and Phil ARE COMING NEAR YOUR CITY on a tour named "Terrible Influence" where Phil's spent 300€ on silicone. It's a wonderful time to be a phan.

OKAY SO here's some stuff that didn't make the cut but that i find too hilarious to not mention. In no apparent order: DAN DRESSING UP AS A CATBOY, Dan and Phil playing technicians 1 and 2 on Big Hero 6 and two brothers on the Lion King (wtf was that also they gave the gorilas matching fringes), Dan dressing up as a golden pig (my boy has RANGE) and finally Dan being too embarassed to admit he stalked Phil and telling a reporter he was only asking for "editing tips" if you know what i mean

Also a short compilation of Dan and Phil losing the idgaf war against eachother THEY ARE SO THOUGHTFUL ABOUT EVERYTHING. Special mention to Daniel's 🧡 when Phil praised "We're all doomed!" and Dan's ranch metaphor to describe their relationship (just go watch the mukkbang video OH LORD)

SO, in conclusion... Dan and Phil's refusal to belittle their past and instead embrace it as part of their story while actively moving into the future alongside the phandom YEAH THAT SHIT MEANS SOMETHING. They're simultaneously healing our inner child while embracing us as the adults we've become i have many feelings about them

So what are they?

They're just Dan and Phil.

[tommyssupercoolblog]

THE SHOW WAS AMAZING OMGGGGGG RAAAUGHGJFHFHFH GOES FERAL AND GNAWS ON MY COMPUTER

ALSO I MADE NEW MUTIALS HI NEW MUTUALS!!!! HEWWO!!!! BAPS YOU WITH MY PAWS

Spoilers under the cut

H-o-t-t-o-g-o, you can take me HOT to goooo

TWINKS ON ICE and "camera flash can be distracting, Phil will fall of the stage and die" absolutely SLAYED me

Dan accidentally said "Dan and pheal" instead of Dan and Phil and they both stopped to pretend to hold the pheal. Dan said that would be a better show than this.

SISTER DANIEL SLAYED

I don't know if this happens at EVERY show but in ours, the audience chose to kill the original Dan and Phil every time

Dan has illegalized ted Cruz but then got arrested for being British. Dr Phil loves helping old ladies cum and his favorite word is skibidi. I don't remember the third facts for either

Even though it wasn't picked, a whole bunch of people around us (and us) started chanting "FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK" when they asked what Dr. Phil's favorite word would be. Later we chanted "TOUR BUS" but that one worked!!!!

One of the audience confessions was that someone likes to "mark their territory" (yes. In the gross way) to know what it's like so sister Daniel called them a bad kitty and they sprayed the audience with water. Also Phil called out that some people had their MOUTHS OPEN while they were being sprayed.

The other audience confessions were that someone wrote "Phantrash(insert some numbers I can't remember)" on a wall in invisible ink and then MOVED OUT OF THW HOUSE AND LEFT IT THERE??? And then a confession that just said "someone in the audience thinks you sound like owls" which they both were confused by at first, but then Dan's face like. LIT UP in recognition and he repeated the question to Phil and Phil said "Who?" And Dan LOST IT and made fun of him. LMAO

They explained their first experience at a bucces. And THEN later phil said that his new favorite nuts are bucces nuts (as revealed later when they were asked by the audience to discuss nuts). Also they hate peanuts and think no one likes them unless they're paid to by "big peanut". And they both like "hot nuts" and Dan likes them salted and Phil likes them sweetened/candied. And yes they made sex jokes about it and also Dan said that Phil's favorite nuts were actually HIS NUTS

Phil having the phitties to the wind was not what I expected

I. Could have SWORN that there was an ...."uninvited guest" in the 🍑 part of the wresting match but no one's posted about it even though the whole theatre was like "AUGH!!" And they cut away and I turned to everyone next to us and was like "!!!! Uh oh was that REAL?? Um-" so. Maybe we were wrong. But I was about to be like "DANIEL HOWELL I AM SO SORRY I HOPE YOUR THERAPIST IS SO GOOD BECAUSE I PERSONALLY WOULD DIE"

Dan wore a cowboy hat during the musical number

I NEED THAT SONG IN MY PLAYLIST AND THAT DANCE MEMORIZED

I MISSED THE FUCKING PHOTO OPP BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T GIVE ME ENOUGH WARNINF TO UNLOCK MY PHONEEEE evil. Evil of them. Dan and Phil you betrayed me personally. Evil. I DID however get them walking aways

I bought the Dan and Phil made me gay shirt

Unrelated to the show itself but someone was handing out worms, and there were SO many sister Daniel cosplayers, and I happened to sit literally right in front of two other systems so it was like. Halfway through the show we realized that's what was happening and it was like HEWWO???? WOAH. Also this was my first time in Austin and guys... guys some sections of these roads are fucking perpendicular. I saw multiple people with mobility aids and like I HAVE ZERO AIDS AND IT HURT TO WALK ARE Y'ALL GOATS??? ARE YOU JUST NOT ABLE TO WALK OUTSIDE AT ALL AND HAVE TO TAKE CARS??? The whole fucking city is a series of V shapes with buildings on it. Girl why do your streets go straight up into the sky are you trying to drive up to jesus. Liked the rentable scooters tho

[lesbiandanhowell]

Sam reacts to: Who Is the Real Dan Howell?

What parallel universe have we entered that we got another video so quickly?? Also the fact that only Dan was on the thumbnail briefly had me thinking this is a Dan solo video and I just, accepted that.

- "How do I please my husband" PHIL WHAT THE FUCK. Wedding hill is so real I am not even joking anymore.

- So much touching I am just thinking of @danrifics every time Dan softly puts his hands on Phils shoulder.

- OH MY GOD PHIL WHEN DID PHIL BECOME THE HORNY ONE OUT OF THESE TWO

- They are wearing so much color in this video, and lowkey matching, like the colors of Phil's sweater are the same shades as Dan's and it's doing things to me.

- I am not going to lie, the sponsors just make me giggle these days like babe they broke.

- "Full drag race challenge" please more gay jokes like this that aren't just incredibly horny, my lesbian ace self is very thankful.

- Phil clutching his pearls (aka his non existent boobs) why has this become a thing?

- "Can we take a moment... who is googling how to chew gum" He sounded so genuinely soft and confused when he said that it made me laugh.

- Dan calling boobs lumps and Phil trying to save it and Dan just breaking out into the full song, all lyrics memorized.

- Dan stop looking at Phil (they kissed after this, I am just going full demon, but come on)

- THEY EDITED THIS THEMSELVES. First video in a hot minute that where no editor is credited which is CURIOUS.

- Dan I do not want to know how to suck dick THANK YOU VERY MUCH I AM FINE ACTUALLY

- "I would wave my trunk around" PHIL ARE YOU LISTENING TO YOURSELF I AM SOBBING and the fact Dan didn't even point it out and just looked at Phil all wtf.

- "How to be cunty" YES DAN BE CUNTY

- "Twitter just shut up"ohhh Dan talking like the tumblr phannies

- HOW DO THEY KEEP MOVING CLOSER like they are basically sitting in each others lap at this rate. They always start out with a reasonable distance and then just lean into each other the entire video.

- "Get a cat" YES GET A CAT

- SHOULDER TOUCHING FUCK OOOOOOOFF

I am severely unwell actually bye.

[dnp-dreams]

I just woke from a fever dream that was I think supposed to be the phan theory video where it opened in their house with a shot of Phil and this small black kitten that had got inside somehow and Phil was begging Dan to keep it and Dan said no we can’t then jump cut to them putting a collar on it and implied that they have a cat now but that same shot jumpcuts to Dan putting a collar on Phil then immediately jumps back to the cat except it’s an adult tabby cat now with 2 heads and it’s implied the joke of the video will be that they will continually change random things to see if we notice/ to fuck with us. It’s slipping away from me now but I didn’t pick up my phone at 4am for nothing, jumpcut to them sitting on their kitchen bench with a little photo frame in front of them, inside of which is an image of their Wikipedia page. They turn to each other and lean in and at the last moment phil turns away and talks to camera, starts a monologue about how it’s been ten (15?) years and after all this time (during monologue camera zooms on the photo frame and the Wikipedia page starts scrolling/merges into some kind of tumblr/Wikipedia mashup of fan theory and official info ) camera zooms back out to dnp again and Phil finishes his monologue saying there’s been so much speculation and (referring to them leaning in before) they couldn’t just do THAT…. He trails off and looks at Dan and then they actually kiss for real. Video ends.

I wake up in a cold sweat thinking my god I’m going to kill them , then I realise it was a dream (nightmare? Phightmare?) but I have this gut feeling that they posted something (the video?) and I somehow absorbed it into my dream via like prophetic energy or some nonsense like that. I check my phone open YouTube. Nothing. I am calm. Open instagram. Everything looks normal FUCK ME NEVER MIND it’s the devil angel photo. I’m filled with rage. I check stories, i see it. I resist the urge to fly to London just so I can smack my head into a wall in front of them. I open tumblr. Everyone else is in a similar state. I dig up your account because I refuse to let this slip away from me.

Here we are. I hope ur day’s going well

anon this was an absolute wild ride. i'm sorry i got to it a few days late but i appreciate you coming here immediately after to tell me this. this is beautiful

[danandfuckingjonlmao]

): sad that the dannies and the anti-dans can't reach peace during the holidays.

aw it’s ok anon i’m sure we can find other things in common. like hey! covid sucks huh? i’m pretty sure i have covid right now and i just took a test so we’ll see. hope you’re well. hope you had a good day and you’re healthy. good will to all dannies, dantis, phillies, phantis, and phannies galore. this is just like the end of a christmas carole. life imitates art.

[dnpbeats]

emma i need to confess something any theory about dnp fucking other people pisses me off

anon i'm gonna put about twenty disclaimers on this bc i'm not trying to start discourse but i must say i agree 😭😭 TO BE CLEAR at the end of the day we don't know the ins and outs of d&p's relationship, and we never will. as dan said in BIG ppl want to know who he's fucking when he's fucking them and how long he's fucking them but that is not our business to know!! so i acknowledge that my thoughts on this are my thoughts and they come from a place of personal bias and projection! so if u disagree that’s okay!! okay anyway:

yeah lmao i get that i honestly don't think that they are in an open relationship for a variety of reasons. like logistically speaking it'd be difficult (espc before they were out) and we at least know phil doesn't like one night stands, so it's not like they're perusing grindr every day looking for someone to hook up with. but also like all the swinging jokes are what make me be like yeah they aren't doing that bc if they were i don't think they'd joke about it sm bc i think it would hit too close to home 💀😭 also, i think people read too much into some of dan's comments during WAD. like i get it, yes he likes making horny jokes, but i dont think it's that deep. like even if he wasn't with phil/was in an open relationship, he wasnt being serious when he said cute mutuals slide into my DMs yk 😭 he's always made jokes about being thirsty it's nothing new. also he himself said that all his thirst posting were jokes*! and other reasons too like how jealous dan gets 💀💀

but i also think people have only one interpretation of what he says sometimes, for example him saying things like this: "This is my hot boy autumn right now and I am very much enjoying, for the first time in my life, being free and out and in the world, being able to actually talk about things, being honest, being able to go out and have fun." which, if you want to interpret that as dan saying he's getting dicked down every night of tour, that's your prerogative! but i do not think that "being free and out in the world" has to be about sex, like there are so many layers to that! i just take it to mean like being able to live authentically and exist as a gay man in public yk?

ive said this a couple times in tags on other posts, but i think that sometimes (not all the time!!) the reason why ppl come up with open relation theories is because it's already a given that d&p are together. like in 2015 you could theorize "are they gay are they in a relationship" because it wasn't explicitly stated by them. but now that they're explicitly gay, and anyone reading between the lines can see that they're together, you can't really "speculate" on phan. so, the next progression is to speculate on the exact nature of their relationship: is it open, are they in a qpr, etc. so anyway yeah that's my two cents 😭 if someone thinks they're in an open relationship that's fine pls don't come for me 😭😭

*I CANT FIND THE SOURCE FOR THIS but i know he said it bc i've referenced it before, when i eventually find it i'll put the link 🙏🏻🙏🏻

[astradyke]

iidk if they'll hard launch on tour but it's just scary how much they're gonna joke about them fuck

NO LITERALLY

see my thing is i think that the sheer bit potential that has arisen from the FOB/MCR festival happening on October 19th has amplified the need for Dan and Phil to decide if they're going to commit to hard launching before tour or if they're going to do it after. i really can't envision them hard launching during tour because if they kiss on first night we're kind of all going to know immediately that they kissed on first night, even if we keep that air-tight that is absolutely going to get some media on it, yeah? and it'd be a gagworthy moment but since it wouldn't get every single crowd the same way i don't think they'd play it like that. i also think for that reason they won't hard launch on october 19th because that would definitely set a new tone for any shows after the 19th.

i am easily persuaded about hard launching again like depending on the hour i either think it'll happen in two weeks, in a year, or literally never like i am that susceptible to being swayed about it. but i do think it's totally possible that they keep up the energy of them not really hard launching but it being Incredibly Obvious They Are Together and like TOTALLY fuck with us on the tour. which would be catastrophic.

i'm just thinking like about the phan conspiracy bit because what's the angle on that going to be right. also what if they do something and then they laugh afterward and say "THAT was the hard launch" <- I CAN HEAR THIS IN THEIR VOICE and this kills me like. Ugh. hate these men .

very scary world we live in anon. be brave i am in solidarity with you... we'll survive this somehow

[freckliephil]

Hi welcome to the aries is hot reveal 😘💋 thanks @energeticwarrior for the time machine meetup! So cute 🥰

Top two pics are me as a freshman in high school in 2011, I used to listen to emo music and pretend i liked it because my best friend did. Id go over to his house and we would google “hot emo boys” and i would wrestle with internalized lesbophobia and compulsory heteronormativity and wonder why i only found boys attractive if they were gay or in touch with femininity in some part of their expression. He would verbally express gender envy and then deny that he was a guy. We figured it out eventually. One day we found dan and phil and spent hours watching their videos. I just assumed they were a gay couple. I didnt subscribe because i didnt have a youtube account of my own, but the two emo boys from youtube who made silly random videos stuck with me.

Over the years, they’ve popped in and out of my peripheral, sometimes occupying a ridiculously large portion of my waking thought, and sometimes fading into the background like two house parrots that you learn to tune out but still occasionally say something so strange and offputting that you have to go “what the fuck did you just say??”

They were there for me in 2016 when i was too anxious to fall asleep and would put on dan’s liveshows, when i was in my final year of college and freaking out about the future, when i was having a menty b or when i was just fucking bored out of my mind. Me and @freckliedan would have found each other in any world, but im glad we had these idiots to bond over in this one. 💕 ive made friends, traveled to new places, and learned things about myself in my time on phannie tumblr and being a proud phannie. I know its cringe and a joke but like dan and phil and this silly little fandom have legit have raised me into the hot sexy lesbian twenty something i am today. Wouldn’t trade this fucked up little community for anything tbh 💕💕