#always love fanfic reviews

[lost-technology]

Ah, having fun checking my email after work. Spam, ugh. An email confirming that my sausage casings have been officially ordered and are ready for the U.S. Postal Service to pick them up from Buffalo, NY!!! Fresh conversational review on Survivor's Guilt! Living my best life.

[legendary-guest]

what r ur favorite drakgo fics?

A very good question! I have a lot of favourites! List with blurbs and commentary incoming, giant. Reviewed Mad Angry, Mad Crazy by bcbdrums Hell hath no fury like a mad scientist scorned! Borderline psychological thriller, equal parts character deconstruction and tragedy, a twisted telling of the aftermath of So the Drama and Mad Dogs and Aliens. Love having your brain scrambled, heart torn apart? This one's for you! I've reviewed this one in particular for anyone who may feel lost when following the story; also, because I adore it.

Mint by OhBoyOhBoy A moment of deep sentiment and romance amongst chaos and debris. Tension is built upon excellently, the sweetness is the peak and the end, a (literal) gasp. This author has great work, but this is my absolute favourite. Contains my favourite Shego name ever.

Drakgo Drabbles by gofordrakgo Some of the best drabble work I have ever seen. No word is wasted. Moments in time, bits of unique characterisation, huge events condensed into 100 words; a wide variety of topics and themes. You will find something you love here, don't let the word count put you off. Less is more, and how! I recommend revisiting a piece that catches your interest to appreciate it better, don't fly through. Dwelling by gofordrakgo A unique origin story for our favourite villains, where a young Shego, Shea (my second favourite Shego name), worms her way into dorky Drew Lipsky's derelict apartment and the domino effect that comes of it. Reverse-engineered Drakgo; unrefined, naive, and...innocent? Lots of sweetness and humour with an underlying, creeping darkness. Developing story, I recommend sticking around - I know I am! and now i'm covered in you by soulffles (NSFW 18+) A fantastic post-Graduation get-together fic with wonderful prose. Deeply romantic, intimate and funny! The internal monologues for this piece are spot on, the way the author weaves in humour amongst these vulnerable moments and thoughts just endears me to Drakken and Shego's plight of...realising that they love each other. A Precise Hand by eclipsing-dreams Fantastic subject of hands being the focus, revolving around all the wonderful things they can do (and can elicit!). Two chapters, one for each of them. Excellently constructed, fantastic characterisation, and just a touch (har har) naughty. A slightly unique edge of characterisation is given to Shego's part that I find intriguing. Happy, sweet ending; you aren't left hanging! Highly recommend the author's other pieces, this is simply my favourite. Here by gofordrakgo Drakken and Shego show-up for each other when they need someone most. The Shego section in this story is my favourite; the best depiction of, to avoid spoilers, a 'vulnerable' Shego I have ever seen. This convinced me, this was her. Dr. D showing up for her in that part, my goodness. I love it. The wounded pride, the shame, the quashing of feeling she presents is just great. Fantastic balance. So lovely. Happy ending. Friends by gofordrakgo Shego realises she may not have been the greatest friend to Drakken, and questions the nature of their relationship post-Graduation in her emotional exhaustion. Fantastic character breakdown, very tightly written. If you love slow-on-the-uptake Drakgo, an emotionally exhausted Shego who suddenly lets her thoughts (and feelings) run wild and awkward domesticity, I recommend. Forfeit by bcbdrums The only winning move is not to play! Somewhat non-linear story-telling, smashing together the bits of Dr. Drakken's shattered life post-Graduation, and post-Shego. O, we love a good Greek tragedy! Parting is such sweet sorrow. Jealous by TheyCanHaveTheSex (NSFW 18+) How can I say no to angry, angst fuelled sex, anguish and repressed feeling? How can I say no to jealousy? I can't, is the answer. Love the tension and how bizarre Shego is in particular in this piece, at least to a certain point. The way the story gives way to genuine hurt, too, I really love it a lot. It's not very heavy, in my opinion, but it does get a bit sad. Sweet, happy ending, I really love this one.

Unreviewed A New Beginning by Windcage (NSFW 18+) Yet another fantastic post-Graduation get-together fic! Mature, sort of refined atmosphere that I love, featuring a particularly distracted Dr. Drakken and an unusually patient Shego - until she isn't. Very, very sweet, romantic and funny. Doc's plant mutation is characterised in a fun way here as well. Highly recommend. come back when you can by obijuankenobi (NSFW 18+) A Drakgo exclusive Graduation Part 1, basically! Excellently written exploration of Drakken and Shego's new careers post-Graduation, and insight into how Dr. D really sees himself, after all the fanfare. Well-written, fun plot that does not overstay its welcome, fun action scenes, Drakken and Shego protecting each other, and, most of all, extremely sweet and tender romance. A++, five gold stars, Honour Roll, you name it. And, Motor Ed gives Shego a sexy motorcycle! Why didn't she ever have one in the show? This author gets it. Bad is Good and Good is Bad by split-n-splice Realistic, gritty and somewhat surreal depiction of how Drakken and Shego met, before they became Drakken and Shego. Strong, tense atmosphere. Visceral, ugly, the lowest they have ever been in their young lives, and, when they meet, consequences are inevitable and paths are determined, set in stone. The author makes clever narrative choices, such as omitting names entirely, which builds upon the emerging, almost 'blank slate' aspects of the Doc's and Shego's identities as youths at this point in time. The setting is fantastic, probably my favourite aspect of this piece. So many strong bits of imagery that involve the environment, especially in the second and third chapters. A great scar origin story, too. I highly recommend for anyone who likes something meatier, more grounded. O yeah, and there's great art inside! How considerate of the author to help the reader out! Durable by tabbyclaw Love this one, especially the bluntness of Shego's inner monologue/prose. Possessive, cheeky, somewhat domineering, almost feigning playing second-fiddle to Dr. Drakken. The setting for this is great, there's a great sense of Shego-flavoured risk and recklessness involved without sacrificing her glamour. This might all sound like nonsense, but, I assure you, it is all there in the text! Fans of kissy-face, this one is for you! (Meaning, every Drakgo fan ever, but I digress).

Untitled by tabbyclaw I always appreciate this author's maturity when dealing with Drakgo, I adore it, and it's present here, too. No skimping on the romance at all, it's just wonderful. A take on a love confession that's just so...nice. After the whirlwind and fervour, realisation rolls in. Comforting. Ocean Views by Aleego ; Tumblr fanfic link inspired by art by midnightcaptions (NSFW 18+) An excellent fic inspired by a great piece of art! Truly a merger of great minds! Phone sex might be nothing new, but it works excellently here to establish tension. It's actually a fantastic headspace for Drakken and Shego to be in as characters, not having to face each other, but to speak as if they were alone. It's a strange bit of intimacy between them that, potentially, serves as a lynch pin to how their dynamic changes. Tastefully written. Truth or Dare by those-other-ones (NSFW 18+) Love this one. Love how unique it is, how casual it is, how unglamorous it is. It's also incredibly sweet, vulnerable. Romantic drunkenness, if you will. Captures their competitive and stubborn personalities very well, sabotaging themselves without even knowing by throwing alcohol into the mix. Happy ending, very tender, intimate, sweet. Full-on sex not something you can handle? Try this one. Untitled by those-other-ones (NSFW 18+) An alternative take on an existing fic where Shego is still a hero in Go City and Dr. Drakken makes his villainous debut! I enjoy how weird this is as a first meeting. The setting allows for a great sexual tension and atmosphere that's very unusual, and, when villain and hero are alone together, fervour, desperation and tenderness are unleashed. Very different, highly recommend. Love this one. Routine by Nikki-wr (NSFW 18+) Drakken and Shego's relationship suddenly becomes physical, but it's not all roses. This is a really excellent, weighty, angsty fic. I love how their misunderstandings, miscommunication and insecurities are depicted, their fears of honesty and taking risks when it comes to each other, juxtaposed with irony of perpetuating a self-destructive path. My words might be strong, but this fic ends very, very sweetly. In truth, all of this author's pieces are strong, and angst-tinged, which I adore, but I've chosen this one to highlight. Love the passion. Oldies: Fics from Years Gone By! Vietnam by Dr. Agent My absolute favourite Drakken-centric Drakgo fic ever, bar none! Drakken's developing feelings for Shego are documented in unguarded moments, woven with masterful, restrained prose. The language in this blows me away, it's just. Wow. There is one line in this, a single line, that I obsess over. Powerful imagery and metaphor that ties together the wilderness, war and jungle-theming of the piece - just brilliant, multi-faceted. The author also has a Shego-centric one to mirror this, but Vietnam is my absolute favourite. Beautiful Dynamite by Crystal Allen My favourite Shego character-study fic, ever! Set during Two to Tutor, the author utilises Señor Senior Sr.'s wisened voice as our guide into the ferocious, yet unattractive, side of Shego. Brilliant, I cannot think of a more polarising pair to make commentary on each other, despite their shared hedonism, passion for wealth and villainy. SSS makes slight Drakgo commentary at the end, which I love. Makes me want to read more from his perspective on the two of them, since in this fic, their relationship sort of parallels and contradicts ones he has had in the past. I highly recommend for any big Shego fans. Jealous by NAster Another great Shego-centric fic with jealousy as a core theme that makes the list? Say it isn't so! Wonderful take on Shego's flighty, ornery nature and how it's influenced her behaviour with Drakken, and, with everyone else. Understated, sweet Drakgo, possessive Shego. What's not to love?

Out of Control by Blackfire 18 The Supreme One's treatment of her last line of defence has warped him, not just in body, but in mind. Some of my favourite nasty lines from Supreme Shego and Drakken live here. Rage, angst and tragedy, all in one. The Supreme One's future is miserable for all, even herself. Downer ending. Seeking Shelter from the Rain by Blackfire 18 A classic. Adore this author's Gothic atmosphere, it's very nostalgic, and very prominent in this dreary piece. Amidst a recent failure, Shego is vulnerable and Drakken is there with her. Comforting, sweet ending. Fatal Mistake in the Dark by Blackfire 18 In my opinion, not as strong as the other two pieces. However, it is the ending to this that I really like. The author's sense of building dread is fantastic and present in all her dark fics, but the pay-off for this one is intriguing. Tragedy...? Everything by Hematitebadger A measured, mature, sweet, outcome of a scenario where Dr. Drakken wins. The sheer gentleness, the duality of Lipsky, what he is capable of and who he is. Just lovely. Minutes and Years by Hematitebadger 50 sentences, a real relic from the past! One of the very best that Drakgo has to offer. You only need one sentence to grab you! Symbiosis by Ninnik Nishukan from The Ones That Never Happened Liked Out of Control? Watch a similar dynamic play out and end in a completely different way! Understand the reasons behind Shego and Drakken's transformation and relationship in this timeline, and the brief humanity they end up sharing. Optimistic, relieving ending compared to its sibling-fic. The author's best work, in my sincere opinion. More? Interesting ideas/cute moments/unique settings that I like Stay by Eienvine - Oldie Any Road Will Get You There by Crystal Allen - Oldie Definitely Exactly What It Looks Like by souljelly - Reviewed Sick Day by split-n-splice - Reviewed Practice Makes Perfect by split-n-splice - Reviewed The Devil Wears a Suit and Tie by split-n-splice - Unreviewed Not Sentimental by sweet_tangerine_dreams - Reviewed New and Not New by Malvolia - Reviewed A Knotty Situation by bcbdrums - Unreviewed In All the Gin Joints in the World, He Asks for Coco Moo by UnapologeticallyMeatwad - Unreviewed The Aftermath by dragannahEireann - Unreviewed / Incomplete Fic Expected by gofordrakgo - Reviewed Just a Pair of Cold Dwellers by OhBoyOhBoy - Unreviewed

Thanks razzledazzledrakgo, for breaking in my ask box, and for breaking the dam! I don't know how to add a Keep Reading cut.

[praetorqueenreyna]

2023 AO3 Year-End Fic Review

I found the AO3 review I had made last year and decided to fill it out for 2023! Answer all the questions yourself, then tag some friends!

What is your AO3 account?

I'm at LittleQueenTrashMouth on AO3!

2. How many words did you write total in 2023?

I wrote 69, 299 words in 2023 for 4 different fandoms! Well 3-4, since one fic was a crossover fic. Most of that was for ACOTAR, which is HILARIOUS considering last year I was so convinced that I was done with ACOTAR. I played myself. It's also way more words than I wrote the past few years, which is cool!

3. How many fics did you publish in 2023? How many multichapters vs oneshots?

I published 17 fics in 2023, 15 of which were for ACOTAR. 3 of those are multichapter, and the other 14 were oneshots.

4. What was your longest fic? Your shortest fic?

The longest fic CONTINUES to be my multichapter Tamlin/Lucien fic, lovely and lonely, which is now at 27,528 words and is ALMOST DONE. My longest oneshot is the Nesta/Eris fic, counterintelligence, which is at 4,446 words. The shortest fic I wrote last year was you up?, which is a modern AU Tamlin/Rhysand fic.

5. What was your most popular fic? Your least popular fic?

My most popular fic was lovely and lonely, which is now at 2,044 hits and 107 kudos!! My least popular fic was the Tamlin/Briar fic Come, my drifting flower, which is at 29 hits and 5 kudos. But TO BE FAIR all the fics I wrote for my gift exchanges are at the bottom of the list for hits/kudos, because they were only published like a week ago!! So the least popular fic that has been online for over a month is my Eris Week fic Concession Strategy, which is at 168 hits and 11 kudos. BUT ACTUALLY I'm realizing now that somebody put the fic in a secret collection so nobody has been able to read it in months lmao. So my REAL ACTUAL least popular fic is the Tamlin/Amarantha fic obsessed with you, at 226 hits and 17 kudos.

6. What fic didn't perform as well as you thought it would?

I feel like I've answered this before lmao but ANYWAY I thought a knife for every heart would perform a little better. It's been up since March and has 143 hits. I guess people don't want to read about Lestat and the Corinthian fucking nasty.

7. What fic performed way better than you thought it would?

ALREADY my Nesta/Eris ACOTAR secret santa fic soare cu dinți is performing way better than expected! It was posted just a couple weeks ago and already has 262 hits, which is PRETTY GOOD for an ACOTAR rarepair! In general I've found that Neris fandom fucking SHOWS UP when you write them fic, which is awesome!!!

8. What was your favorite fic you wrote in 2023?

LMAO my favorite fic this year continues to be my Yellowjackets fic, Lagomorpha. idk I just love writing body horror and psychosexual tension and learning about how fucked up rabbits are. I also just LOVE Shauna, I'd really like to write more from her POV in the future!!!

9. What was your favorite fic that somebody else wrote in 2023?

OKAY LISTEN!!!! yall are very talented but really stood no chance against @goforth-ladymidnight's Tamcien fic A Second Chance. Seriously, if you haven't read this fic, GO READ IT RIGHT NOW!!! IT'S AMAZING!!! LIFE CHANGING!!!! EARTH SHATTERING!!!

10. Tag your friends to have them do this year-end fic review as well!!

OKIE I TAG PEOPLE!!! if you see this and I don't tag you, please fill it out!!

@queercontrarian @northern-star-polaris @riote @thevanserrras @foxcort @goforth-ladymidnight @andrigyn @looseleaflettuce @isterofimias @drowning-in-cacophony

[alvfr]

can i ask how long have you been writing? it blows my mind how good it is. you are very gifted and we’re all so lucky to get to read your works for free and i really hope you publish something big one day

also do you have any tips for new writers? i’ve been writing intermittently for some time but i still find it so hard not to compare myself and get bummed out or discouraged when there’s writing like yours out there 💔

Ps: I’m loving all the snippets of everything you’ve posted. keep up!

Oh, probably forever? I mean, I was making up stories before I could write and made small books by hand before I could type and I remember using my grandfather's clunky old laptop to painstakingly write my first "real" stories after I started school.

I started writing in English when I was probably 12-13 years old though and I'm 30 now so it's been a while. I posted some stuff on Quizilla back in the day (which oddly wasn't fanfic, but original stories), and I posted my first story on FFN when I was around 20 years old I think?

I go through periods of time where I write a lot and then I don't write at all for a while, mostly because real life gets in the way or something drains my creative energy. Like I couldn't write more than one sentence at a time the first year after I had my baby. Not because I didn't have time, but because the baby took all my focus and I did not have anything leftover to be creative.

Anyway, I think my best tip for new writers is just to write a lot. Like allow yourself to practice, to be bad, to experiment, to learn - just like you would any other hobby, you know? I have posted more than 1 million words on AO3, but I probably have more than twice that much that I'm never going to post that's just collecting dust in my dropbox. And that's fine! It's just practice!

Right now, I'm trying to re-learn how to write in my own language again (Norwegian) because it sounds awkward and weird to my ears and that is probably because I haven't written in Norwegian since I left high school - I need to practice.

Also, be careful comparing your first draft with someone else's finished product. I don't spend too much time editing my fanfics (because it takes the fun out of it and I never make progress), but even I re-read my writing a few times and change phrasings here and there to make it flow better. I personally like to read everything out loud (making funny voices during dialogue) to catch if it flows how I want it to flow.

Another tip is to read a lot. Preferably published books, but fanfiction too. I'm a bit weird here because I can't read fanfiction for the fandom I'm writing for and that is just because I know I will start to compare myself to others and be discouraged, just like you mentioned. Both when it comes to writing style and level of engagement. I mean, some fics have 1000s of notes or kudos/comments and I start wondering how bad my writing is because it doesn't get the same response. At one point, I almost wished someone would post a bad review of my story because it would have felt better than the complete radio silence I received. Truth is, I think engagement is mostly related to coincidence. Summaries, tags and format matters, of course, but after that it's just down to luck. If you're lucky, your story will find its readers and if you're especially lucky, those readers will let you know that they liked it :)

I'm wary of reading nothing but fanfiction though because we fanfic writers tend to get influenced by each other and use a lot of the same expressions, I think. There's a reason I never have characters smirk, chuckle or hum anymore because I'm still traumatized by how much I used that when I started writing. It's bad enough with how much eyebrow quirking and raising I manage to add in a single story. Also when it comes to characterizations, I try to stay true to the source material, but it's easy to mistake fanon for canon when you read too much of the same stuff.

Sorry, this got super long. I'm just sorry to hear that you're discouraged, especially because I am the exact same way when it comes to comparing myself to others. We are our own worst critics, but I highly encourage you to keep writing! I cringe when I look back at my first stories, but I would never have improved if I hadn't written those stories in the first place :)

[sixohsixoheightfourtwo]

re: what fandom 'a little life' came from, my immediate knee-jerk thought was "backstreet boys." i have absolutely no basis for this other than Terminally Online Brain Worms esp bc..........there are 5 of those boyband fellas and as far as i remember only 4 main characters in that book lmfao. what can i say. the boyband angle feel right

yeah i'll incorporate that into my belief system

[tojifile]

Kibutsuji Muzan: Reincarnation

You're back..

Genre: Romance // Muzan x oiran!reader

⚠️: prostitute!reader, suggestive, kidnapping, not fully consensual

A/N: My first non-bsd fanfic !! I'm super happy about it, I read about an oiran and the differences in social classes at 12AM, it was like reviewing for my history class again. It was a lot of late-night reading so if there's misinformation please inform me immediately !!

INSPO: pinejayy

It was a well-lit and busy night, as it always was in the entertainment district. Little did everybody know the demon king—Kibutsuji Muzan was in their midst, walking along the streets, blending in with the loud crowd.

A procession was about to start, all eyes would be on the oiran—dragging her geta on the ground as she walked. The oiran on this particular night was none other than, you. Your scent was immediately picked up by Muzan. It was the same scent he had grown to love, from the person he had lost to time.

His interest was piqued the moment he picked up your scent. His gaze traveled far, trying to find the source of the scent. His gaze then landed on you, he watched you as you walked with such grace, you were as beautiful as the day he lost you.

Muzan lost you through the inevitable disease called time. You weren't willing to become a demon—instead, you promised him that you would find eachother in each lifetime and it will all end the same, with you in his arms.

You were given the name 'Minori' by the oiran who took you in as a child, starving in the unforgiving world of class and power. As an oiran you were known to be quite finicky. Although an oiran did have the right to choose who they would lay with, you were known for having not slept with anyone ever since you rose to your rank. Many men tried wooing you with their "looks" and "charm" but in the end you deem none of the worthy.

You were intelligent, beautiful, and skilled in various languages and arts. You were also a dear friend of Koinatsu, one of the most revered oiran in the Yoshiwara District. Muzan had heard about Minori before, from mundane gossip to papers of advertisement. He just didn't expect it to actually be you.

After seeing you walk, he spoke to Daki. He had released an order to his demons that you weren't allowed to be killed—instead, you had to be protected. Anyone who had protested against Muzan's order was immediately killed, without another word from their lifeless lips.

You had just gone back from the procession, you were quietly fixing up in your room, filling it with your presence. It was neither sweet nor destructive, it was just you. You were sitting in front of the mirror, fixing your hair until you saw a man appear behind you—you immediately stood up and looked back in fear.

Suddenly the room went dark, you couldn't see a thing. You then felt an eerie presence behind you—it was Muzan. He gently grabbed you from behind, by the waist and pulled you closer to him. "You're back.." he whispered in your ear.

It was strange, the man's touch was cold and his breath wasn't even slightly warm. Your body tensed up, "b- back..?." you nervously asked "Y/N.. I thought I'd never see you again.." he mumbled softly while one hand was secured on your waist, preventing further problems and the other hand lifting your chin to one side, granting him access to your neck.

'Y/N? Who was he talking about? I don't even know anyone named Y/N, maybe this was a new thing with men, maybe roleplay is quite popular nowadays, is this just a drunkard that wandered in my room?!' were the thoughts that ran into your head. You were too afraid to move, you didn't know what wrath would be brought down on you if you disobey.

Chomp he bit your neck, his fangs sunk into your neck, blood trickled down your skin, staining your carefully crafted kimono. You felt a sharp pain in your neck, you felt the blood trickling down your skin as well. He removed his teeth from your skin, letting the blood flow down.

Tears rolled down your cheeks as he stopped biting you, he turned you to him and wiped your tears away with his thumbs, a soft smile could be seen on his face. "Oh Y/N.. you used to love my bites.." he spoke with a sweet tone. You reached up for his hands "Who are you.. please stop.." You muttered, your fear was clear, you were trembling slightly as you held the back of his hands tightly. This made him angry, his grasp on you tightened and the soft smile on his face was replaced by an angry scowl.

He wasn't letting you go this time. You were going to live with him forever, he couldn't abide by your wishes. He needed you by his side, he wasn't going to play by the rules set by time and destiny.

You whimpered softly as he tightened his grip. His hands travelled back to your waist, pulling you in. You haven't fully grasped the events of the night. It was all too much.. how could he bite you like that? Who was Y/N? You looked at him through your tear-filled eyes and held onto his chest. "P- please.." you mumbled.

Muzan wasn't going to listen to reason, he let you have some of his blood to ensure that you'd stay with him forever. You were now a demon at his mercy. Although you didn't suffer the same curse the other demons did. Muzan wanted to hear you say his name, after not hearing it for centuries, he needed to hear it now.

You grasped his arms tightly as you felt yourself transform from a human to a demon. You felt your fangs and your desire for blood growing. You were still clearly competent but your body grew weaker due to the high concentration of his blood. Muzan picked you up, making sure you wouldn't be able to escape. "It doesn't matter if you don't remember me, in time you'll learn to love me again." He spoke with a cold tone. He then disappeared into the night sky with you in his arms.

Spontaneous post: 07/03/23 02:25AM GMT+8 Philippine Standard Time

[bad268]

Heyy I love your Kimi fics so I decided to send you in a request. I wanted something simples of their life’s as teenagers with very different livings yk. Maybe compilation of different moments of them together such as: she is on school brake so goes to a race with him, he keeps her secret of course but as just an excuse to pass more time together. Or maybe a glimpse of their nightly routine when they get to be together, like ordering food because any of them trusts the other with the stove and then getting ready to bed and just cuddle. Or also like they want to pass time together but she has a test (they probably study in the same school but Kimi just doesn’t care anymore) and he is simply laid in her bed reviewing his data from racing while she is in her desk studying. I think you understood the idea, just some cute fluff of two teens in love. Use your amazing creativity as much as you want, I’ve read a lot of your fanfics and I trust you I’ll make justice to a cute fluff. I hope you enjoy my idea.

Just A Glimpse (Andrea Kimi Antonelli X Reader)

Fandom: RPF/F2/F3

Requested: Clearly (hehe this was fun to do)

Warnings: ADHD mentioned, talks about smacking pasta if that makes you uncomfortable (i guess)

POV: Second Person (You/your)

W.C. 1109

Summary: Just a glimpse into the life of Kimi and you.

As always, my requests are OPEN

MASTERLIST // HITLIST

~~(^Pinterest)

Your relationship started back when neither of you knew what love was. Back when you were naive 16-year-olds, you and Kimi connected because you were from the same area. Back then, Bologna, Italy was not the biggest area, and you two clung together like magnets. It became a running joke when he came back to racing after a midseason break, glued to his phone, that he found someone. 

That someone was you.

As your relationship progressed, you tried to be at as many races as possible, but when he first made the jump from FRECA to Formula 2, then Formula 1 at age 18, it wasn’t that easy. You were just starting in university, and it was already difficult to attend the 14 race weekends. Never mind the 25 they were making F1 drivers do. Still, you tried your best, and Kimi was always supportive of your ambitions.

He also tried his best to keep you hidden, Sure, he talked about you here and there, but he never named you and never posted you. He wanted you to have the privacy to do your school work in peace without being bombarded by fans. You two decided you would probably announce your relationship when you finished your degree. If you decided to continue higher after that, you’d either do it online or suffer with the newfound attention. Granted, your accounts were private, but you still knew the fans would spam you somehow.

One of your favorite things to do is hide away in Kimi’s driver’s room. It was a common occurrence that you would be studying while Kimi was preparing for a race. More often than not, you would be sat on the couch studying or working on assignments while Kimi is either reviewing data or stretching and getting ready for a session. On the rare chance Kimi had nothing to do, he would ask you a million and one questions about your work.

“What’s this essay about?” “That looks difficult.” “Didn’t you just finish a project for that class?” “That seems a bit much for a basic class.” Those were some of the things he would say whenever he looked over your shoulder as you skimmed anything on your computer. His interest always gave you new motivation to keep going.

Another favorite for you was the nights between races. The nights when neither of you had anything to do other than be with each other. Sometimes you would force Kimi to do face masks with you (skin care is essential!), sometimes you two would try to cook, sometimes you would just cuddle, and in the event you do all three, all hell breaks loose. 

“Stop moving so much,” You hissed annoyed that this boy could not sit still for the life of him and let you put the mask on. You had already struggled enough trying to get all of his curly hair back, but now he was flinching away every time you tried to put the product on his skin. “I swear, you have ADHD.”

“It’s cold, and I don’t like it. This one feels weird,” He groaned but stopped moving and let you do your thing. “Why do we need to do the slimy one? Can we just use the clay one again?”

“Your skin needs hydration, not help with the texture,” You explained as you laid the mask across his features. “Your face is inflamed and the clay mask will just make it worse. This one would actually benefit you.”

“I better get cuddles after this,” He mumbled as you finished up by washing your hands. Your mask had already been applied.

“After we make dinner, you can get all the cuddles you want,” You compromised, thinking dinner would not take too long to make. It was a new pasta recipe you got from Kimi’s nutritionist, and Kimi is Italian. What could go wrong? Those were your famous last words.

“Stop smacking the dough! The flour isn’t mixed right!” You shouted, but it was no use. Kimi walked straight up behind you and smacked the dough pile again just after you added more flour. This caused a cloud of flour to hit the two of you directly in the face. “ANDREA!”

“Oh no,” He muttered after he blew out the flour and went to wipe his face, but his hands got covered in the face mask he still had on. “Oh no.”

“‘Oh no’,” You mocked as you gaped at him. “What did I just say?”

“Stop smacking it,” He tried to sound serious and apologetic, but the smile on his face told that he was amused by the situation. 

“And what did you do?”

“Smacked it.”

“What did you learn?”

“Stop smacking pasta when you’re mixing it.”

That was it. You both couldn't help it as you both started laughing.

You made Kimi clean up the kitchen after you both washed off the floury face masks. You told him that since he got you into that mess, he could clean it up. While he did that, you called and ordered your favorite takeaway. You did not trust Kimi in the kitchen anymore. You went to pick it up, and when you came back, Kimi had cleaned the kitchen and set up a blanket fort in the common room. You chuckled to yourself as you walked up to the opening of the fort, but Kimi blocked you from entering. 

“What’s the password?” Kimi smirked as he only exposed his head and would not let you see inside.

“Is it Italian or English?” You countered.

“To make it easy, I’ll accept English,” Kimi teased as he watched you think.

“Hmm, the password has to be, ‘I bought dinner, and if you want to eat tonight, you better let me in.’ Is that right?”

“Actually, it was ‘I love you’ but I’ll take it.”

The inside of the fort was more than you expected. Kimi had moved the TV down, so it fit inside. There were pillows and blankets everywhere, and your favorite drinks were in an ice bucket to the side. You were impressed he was able to get this all done while you were picking up the food.

“How did you get this done? I wasn’t gone that long,” You asked skeptically as you sat down and looked around.

“You walk slow,” Kimi joked, but immediately after, the door slammed closed and someone texted Kimi.

“I better get credit for helping,” It read from Ollie. You looked over at Kimi who was smiling sheepishly at you.

“Want to comment on that?”

“No, not really.”

That’s just a little glimpse into the life of you and Kimi.

~~~~~

© BAD268 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

[itsgrimeytime]

@imaginemyfavoritefics

Magnolia in May (Part Eight) || Rick Grimes (TWD) x Greene!f!reader Regency AU

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7...

Taglist: @loliakeoghan23 @belaballs @curlycarley

AVAILABLE ON AO3

Inspiration (in honor of Speak Now Taylor's Version): Enchanted by Taylor Swift

Summary: Your town was small, not the smallest you knew, but anyone of high fortune was the gossip of the week. Predictably, Richard Grimes was a thing of whispers -rumors of a search for marriage among the grassy hills. You weren't one to buy into town gossip, but something about him... just seemed a little too intriguing.

TWS: secrets, hidden information, and miscommunication.

[[ A/N: hey girlies <333. Time for some confrontation !!! This gif exudes gentleman Rick with like CONFLICT. The epitome of the current vibes of this series. This is gonna be a long one, babes, stay in it for the long haul. Thanks for reading :))) ]]

You couldn't breathe, holding the ivory paper to your chest -like the words wouldn't be there anymore. It felt like your heart was bleeding out onto the page, his matter of speak so open that you found something deep within you wishing to share that vulnerability. Despite all the pain, you wished to be somewhat closer to him.

'I ask, from the depths of my heart, don't leave Alexandria.'

Words swirling around your head, you wondered distantly if you could even make any sense out of it all. Certainly not now, with the sort of touched sorrow that twisted into your stomach -guilty and ever-so-slightly hopeful.

You'd never been so confused in your own feelings, it was so easy to villainize Lori before you knew her. And now that you had, it was hard to detach the empathy, the guilt-

It was so exhausting, and you truly wished to sleep it all away. Think later, digest later, but something had been unfinished -pushed to the side.

The invitations.

Without so much as an extra moment, you held the letter to your chest and rushed down the stairs -despite everything, you were desperate for whatever you could get from him. Initially, you'd started by the door -figuring they were maybe placed with some of the mail, but after scouring that stack, you ended up empty-handed.

They were smarter than that, you noted to yourself -turning off toward Father's desk.

His desk wasn't organized, papers and files everywhere -it was a miracle he knew where everything even was. Your fingers brushed over the tops of some stacks, waiting for the rather thick texture, or at the very least the pure ivory tone. Even as you organized stacks and siphoned through drawers, you were still left disappointed.

"God," you sighed, looking in a few telling places -bookshelves, under pillows, and even in the fireplace embers.

Someplace, somehow, you'd ended right back at the entry -cleaning the dust off a shelf with some of Father's trinkets from his travels, and your eyes caught on a stack. Hidden behind one of the statues (crafted out of some sort of heavy stone) were a number of envelopes that had yet to be mailed.

Your first instinct was that these were the ones Beth had meant to send off, and maybe, that's why you'd gathered them of your own accord. Your letters, though, if how they were delivered to you was any indication, were not in envelopes -only folded. You supposed that since they hadn't gone through the official post, there was no need.

It had to be about 5 envelopes there, just based on the feel, as you placed them down on the table -shuffling through the paper for any sort of reason for them to be stashed. Your eyes caught on the handwriting -Headmistress's, all curly letters and eloquent print, it read: Mrs. Ettington.

That name had rung a bell, a sort of old friend that she'd only been reconnecting with the past few weeks. She'd said they'd gone to school together long ago, and she was delighted to catch up. It was rather pointed, her mentioning of it to you -all details and sure you remembered the name. At the time, you'd brushed it off as her wishing to cheer you up, but now-

Your fingers were quick to break the envelope seal.

It was dated the day of the dinner, in swirled lettering across the top right -not proper for postage. It was clear this envelope was just for show.

With two fingers, you fished out the thick paper -carefully pulling the texture out onto the table. To your surprise, it was two. Handwritten notes from the mere few hours before the dinner, and you knew that handwriting by now.

'Dr. Greene and Family,' it read, in far more formal writing than what your note had been consistent of, '-It is with great sorrow that I must cancel our planned dinner scheduled for later this evening. I'm sure you're well aware of my current situation from the papers, I've even heard some of my staff gossiping, so the concept is not far-fetched. And my hope of this matter being dealt with quickly has come with its fair share of hiccups, so at this current point in time, rescheduling will be put on pause. I apologize for any inconvenience and will take it upon myself to explain this matter to Ms. Greene. If you shall wish to let me, I would request she comes to my estate on the 'morrow so as to get rid of any misunderstandings. Awaiting your response, Richard Grimes.'

"'-will take it upon myself to explain this matter to Ms. Greene,'" you read out to yourself, tone rather solid and dull. That had not happened, had the Headmistress stopped it? Or had she not noticed the note until after your return?

It wouldn't have been something to bring up then -shed tears and shivering from the rain, you were sure the thought hadn't even crossed her mind.

With a quick motion, you'd picked up the second note in the pile -the formal invitation. It resembled the same as the ball's, all perfectly cut edges and balanced, elegant printing -but not as embellished.

The words were brief but said much of the same as his letter -at least pertaining to you. It was, as Mr. Dixon had explained, a summoning. A rather direct one with an explicit purpose.

Your heart had nearly cracked out of your chest, and yet your hands reached for the next envelope -detailed a mere few days later. You were going to read them all, no matter if it hurt. You'd already been hurt, all you had wanted to do was know.

'Dr. Greene,' a more direct address, seeming to note the lack of success for the last one -still formal but not as distant as the last, '-I think you know what I'm contacting you for, either from the previous letter or mayhaps from your own daughter returning late last evening. Is she well? I tried to get her a carriage but she refused and the rain hasn't even let up well into the next day. If you would be so kind as to let me know if she's ill, it would soothe me greatly. And do not hesitate to ask for any sort of monetary assistance if the care is needed, I understand she's in great hands, your own, but I wish to offer my services in case of necessity. Any other matter is of less importance than her health, so despite the complicated situation -I am at your beck and call. Anxiously awaiting your response, Richard Grimes.'

It was difficult to swallow, reading through the note -you'd supposed this one had went into his hands, however. Remembering that your Father had his hands on a medicine rather quickly, one he'd had a hard time keeping stock of in the clinic. Had Mr. Grimes sent it?

The other note was a response, thin writing was easily your father's -you recognized along the paperwork scattered everywhere in the house. You could hardly read it, though, written so hastily, only a few words sticking out but you'd gathered it was, in fact, about the shortage.

Even further supported by Mr. Grimes's response detailed at the bottom, 'I will set out as soon as possible for Atlanta for such medicine. There is nothing to repay, I would do anything for her, you must know that by now.'

It was rather rushed, words all crooked and ink bleeding -you'd imagined he'd left as soon as the quill was lifted. For you.

You felt tears burn behind your eyes, sinking into the chair you had been roaming towards -imagining the hesitance of himself at the door. Father accepting the medicine, and the pull of concern he would have had. But he couldn't come inside -you imagined it might've broken his heart to leave. No, it had to.

You'd taken the next one in your hands, it was the next day after the last and upon looking at it, seemed written faster, quicker. Like it was merely his thoughts as he scribbled them out.

'Dr. Greene,' it read -still composed but something about the letters blurred together more, '-I must make it clear that every and any intention I have with Ms. Greene is honorable. I can only imagine the turmoil she may be going through at this very moment, and it truly crushes me that it is my fault. I intended to explain it myself, but she seems to have garnered a meaning herself without my input. If you have any respect for me, I would ask sincerely that you let me explain myself. She is far more important to me than I think anyone has realized, and while I understand your hesitance, the situation does not look favorable. I fear if I cannot explain it now then, she may never know. And I truly don't wish for it to end this way, or for it to end at all. Richard Grimes.'

He didn't wish for it to end, thrummed against your skull, as you pulled out another formal invitation, same details different date. The print had no tells.

You couldn't think on it too long, or you'd never get through them. And you were determined to do so. This time three pieces tumbled out of envelope, two of which were rather familiar.

'Dr. Greene,' the fourth one started, words closer -rushed, and the ink bled, '-I'm not sure if you're even reading these at this point. But I'm at a rather, regretfully, desperate moment. I considered delivering this one myself just so I could be sure you'd at least read it. I'm not sure I could quite handle it if you refused to let me speak to her, however, so I am to send this by courier again. All I've found I can do is hope you believe me in my urgency, and at this current time, I'm not sure you even respect me enough to do so. But I cannot help but try. I will not stop trying. I can't. Please, just let me explain myself. Allow her to choose if she believes my intentions, or if she wants to accept to meeting me. I will respect that decision if it comes to pass, but truly dread if it ever comes. Respectfully, Richard Grimes.'

You recognized the invitation, all formal in it's presentation with the date changed. But it did not come alone. There was a second note to be brandished to a different face -you wondered if it had ever gotten there.

'Ms. Maggie Greene,' it detailed, '-I know it's rather unusual, writing through a sister to get to someone. And I considered addressing this directly to the eldest Ms. Greene, but I'm sure you understand my hesitancy. I'm not sure anything I send her will be seen by her own eyes, by choice, or by the ignorance of not knowing it ever existed. All I ask is simply for you to tell her I wish to speak to her. In any capacity. Or that I'm reaching out at all, I fear that she doesn't know I'm fighting for it. That my plans are set in stone, and that her assumptions, or perhaps the world's, are without a doubt the truth. You know my intentions, you always have, ever since that day near the seamstress shop. And I ask that you honor that and tell your sister I am still fighting, that I have not run away. Please. Sincerely, Richard Grimes.'

You'd reread it, over and over again like it would change a single thing. Like the words would be any different. 'I am still fighting... I have not run away-' bouncing around your skull like the words could change, like they could mean anything but what they meant-

You'd never thought about the idea that maybe he wouldn't decide to reconcile his marriage. That he'd choose you. It didn't seem possible, even now, you still hesitated to believe such a thing.

But it was here, maybe not said directly, but it was there. Underneath each written word, everything he said framed it to be seen. Maybe he hadn't meant to, but the delicate care you felt in each word -it was unmistakable. With every swirl of concern, urgency, anything, you could tell that he'd found himself caring for you. Even just a little.

It hardly felt little but you didn't wish to be too hopeful.

The last envelope felt as if it had its own set of eyes, staring you down -rooting you to your spot. Smoothed into a chair, hair surely a mess and cheeks an aggravated red from the wiping of tears, you felt quite inadequate to win the stare. And a part of you truly wondered if you'd already gone too far.

Perhaps this last letter was a recanting, and detailed that despite all of these, he had given up and wished to pursue life as a married man. For his children, for the betterment of his estate, whatever reason he chose was the most accurate. There was quite a list in favor of it, you'd done it yourself. Tried to rationalize your heartbreak, like maybe it would change how you feel. Make it seem more impossible, so your mind would be tricked into understanding that it was never yours to have.

Your hands moved before you could stop them, as you opened the final envelope -it was thinner than the others. Just a single slip of paper hidden there, not an invitation, you'd guessed. As you pulled it between your fingers, your eyes squeezed shut, instinctually, almost as if you'd said a quick prayer rather than gathered yourself for what it said.

Deep breath in and a slow breath out, you patted at your cheeks with a bit of cloth and began.

'Ms. Greene,' it started, words wonderfully composed and written but still somehow vulnerable, '-I'm not sure you shall ever receive this note. Or any at all. Not because I didn't wish it, but merely because I doubt you'll ever be made aware of its existence. I've been going back to Mr. Elliotts, asking him how you are. He says he hasn't seen you in days. I haven't seen you in days either. My head is a mess as it is, but I find something clears it all when I think about you. I've never been more certain about you. I suppose I'm just afraid I don't know if you are as certain as you once were. I want you to be. I need you to be. I can't properly voice this here, it's much larger than I'm able to quite capture in the written word. Or maybe any words at all. Ms. Greene, I wish to speak to you. It's all I want. I just want a word, and if you slam the door, I will respect it. But even with an idea that they're might be a bad outcome, I have to try. I would hate myself if I didn't try. Please. Yours, Richard Grimes.'

Please, was the word that stuck that time, please.

As you neatly stacked the bits of paper -mindlessly, you found it was all that had played on repeat. All that you could see was desperation, flitted through the stroke of the quill, the bleeding if the ink. It felt as though his heart was there, in that note -extended on an opened palm.

Like it was a simple offering, one you could refuse. Or one you could take, one you could listen to and care for.

It was there under all the notes under all the words, under every dip of ink Richard Grimes had offered his heart up -vulnerable and open and desperate.

And you hadn't known.

You thought back to your final words with the man, before you disappeared off into the rain, heartbroken and unfixable -'you're not mine'.

Stretched across your lips, holding back a sob, it was true. From what you understood then, it was true. You hadn't asked him, sure, but it seemed like the obvious choice. That you were not the one he was fighting for.

But if felt here, in these tiny little letters that you hadn't seen, that he was trying to show you: 'I am yours, all yours.'

Like there was never a doubt to him, and he only sought to prove it. To show you, because you hadn't listened-

But you were late, not of your own accord but you were still far too late. And a part of you wondered if maybe it was too late. Or if there were more, or if he was still trying, still fighting-

You could only hope so.

[writingquestionsanswered]

Hi. I'm the person who asked for help with the enemy of the week type thing. I was wondering if you could explain the different types of writting? (fanfic, novella, all that stuff)

Different Types of Writing and Stories

By Word Count: *

Drabble: 100 word story Micro Fiction: 50 to 500 words Flash Fiction: 2000 words or fewer Short Story: 1000 to 10,000 words Novelette: 7,500 to 20,000 words Novella: 20,000 to 50,000 words Novel: 50,000 to 120,000 words Epic Novel: 120,000 words or more * (estimates vary)

By Type:

Poetry: literature using figurative language and crafted verse Fan-Fiction: fiction written by fans of existing canon material *** Diary/Journal: personal account of life experiences Travelogue: personal account of one's travel experiences Fiction: prose literature describing imaginary events and people Non-Fiction: prose literature about factual events/subjects/people Creative Non-Fiction: creative writing used in non-fiction narrative Play: a script for a story to be performed on stage Screenplay: TV/movie script including acting and scene directions Technical Writing: professionally written technical information Critical Writing: personal reviews of a product like film/food/book Expository Writing: provides facts and research about a given topic

By Fiction Genre: Fantasy Sci-Fi Adventure Thriller Romance Historical Fiction Contemporary Children's Fiction Dystopian Mystery Horror Paranormal

*** fan-fiction can be any word count/genre

By Non-Fiction Genre: Memoir Humor Travel Self-Help History How-To Motivational Humor Personal Development Cookbook Art Family & Relationships

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

LEARN MORE about WQA

SEE MY ask policies

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[liketheinferno2]

These aren't full ref sheets but I was trying to take some clear pictures of Hephaistos for later art reasons and then got side tracked doing all of the Pandaemonium bosses so here they are in order. Also for anyone following who doesn't play FFXIV and knows it as the catgirl game, enjoy this instead? VISUAL SPOILERS obviously.

Asphodelos

Warder of the Condemned: Erichthonios

Mythic Creation: The Hippokampos

Mythic Creation: The Phoinix

(+ familiars)

Hemitheos: Hesperos

(+ sexy fanfic redesign by Nemjiji)

To be brutally honest I never really liked either of these designs compared to every other Hemitheos we get, I think the really brutal black and red of the Phoinix is weakened by gold accents, but I still am always down for gay vampire surf rock. The Savage version kind of looks like Ultimalius as well if you've played XVI.

Abyssos

Mythic Creation: Proto-Carbuncle

Hrgrhhgrhrgrh

Hemitheos: Hegemone

^ My favourite detail on this is you can see the parasite's outlines in her robes and in her legs, then right through the eye holes on the mask to wrap around the torso. I'm convinced this version of Hegemone is functionally an ant being piloted by a cordyceps infection.

Hemitheos: Agdistis

She's very big

Perfect Imperfection: Hephaistos

I'm probably biased by Abyssos being the first raid I was there for day of release but these really are all fantastic. It's also when the story abandons all pretense of not being (at least partly) about family abuse and is loudly using the body horror and shackle motifs to talk about that. It's great. Hephaistos specifically is constantly bulging and twisting in and out of different forms like a highly unstable chimera and the more I look at these the more I notice parts that just should not be there. He's giving everything.

As for the Savage design It's a hard thing to rate as such but my favourite part is the veins that grow down from the eyeholes in his mask like bloody tears.

Thanks Abyssos I love you

Anabaseios

Mythic Creation: Kokytos

Dæmoniac Dungeon: Pandæmonium

It's really hard to communicate how huge this nasty tumor crab I zoomed out as far as physically possible in the game engine and subsequently ended up at a goofy angle staring up his nose.

Ephemeral Justice: Themis

Best boy. The double ended lance and second pair of arms are fantastic for this character.

Theos: Athena

In.. almost every final fantasy adventure you're fighting the real villain not at the very end but a little beforehand, the big iconic end boss is often more a metaphorical figure representing everything wrong with that first person's ideals. Athena cut out the middle man and became her own JENOVA.

I do like the moth angel, especially the hollow body full of dubious orbs, but with her eyes closed all the time it gives off the impression of this not even being the true body but some kind of anglerfish lure in the shape of a fairy... which might be true because this exists:

I really really love her twitchy anemone feelers and how the moth body ends up grafted to the rest of it waist down.

Anyway there's the gang I did not specifically intend for this to be design reviews I just wanted to have clear photos because when you actually see them in game there's other things to focus on. In hindsight I can appreciate more the theming of each tier and then the series as a whole, but my only (extremely obvious) observation for now is that every character Athena had a personal hold over is decorated in chains somehow and so I should have seen the Hegemone thing coming lmao. Heph and Aggy are still my favourites I don't think that's changing any time soon. I'm also noticing that Anabaseios is now just old enough for random DF parties to fuck up severely and I find that fun so I'm going to go fight the crab mansion now.

[incorrectbatfam]

The batfam as teacher comment section in report card.

Dick: Mr. Grayson brings a contagious energy to the class and his enthusiasm is well-appreciated. However, he tends to channel that energy very physically and while that may benefit his learning, it's a disruption to other students. This is a frequently recurring issue that I would like to discuss with a parent or guardian.

Translation – Is this kid ADHD because he won't sit the FUCK down

Jason: Mr. Todd has displayed remarkable attention to detail and a love of literature that I can only attribute to positive reinforcement at home, and he's always a pleasure to have in class. As much as I appreciate seeing him apply his lessons outside of school hours, I believe there are more productive avenues of discussing Shakespearean playwriting with his peers than what he has been reportedly doing. 

Translation – Stop biting your thumb at people

Tim: Mr. Drake continues to exceed expectations in his schoolwork, but his attendance and participation may become a detriment to his overall grades if unaddressed. I have caught him sleeping in class on multiple occasions but he has yet to provide me a reason why he is so tired. Additionally, last month one of our monitors caught him loitering in the bathroom with a note that I did not recall writing. 

Translation – Get some sleep and also you can't make your own hall passes

Damian: I have had the privilege of teaching the Wayne family through my decades at this institution and I believe that Damian takes after his father the most in more ways than expected. His grades are stellar and he is well-organized, but I'm noticing familiar and concerning traits in his attitude and social interactions. I am requesting a meeting with his parent to understand the full context so I can devise a plan for out how to best support him. 

Translation – Forget falling, the apple is still on the damn tree

Duke: Mr. Thomas has been a pleasure to have in my chemistry lab and is always willing to help classmates who are struggling. However, after last week's minor combustion reaction mishap, I think it would be worthwhile to review the lab safety packet that all students received at the beginning of the year. 

Translation – How did you set water on fire

Cullen: Mr. Row displays a passion for transformative literature and demonstrates a clear understanding of modern media culture that has helped him synthesize a lot of our complex readings. However, I'm concerned about his laptop being a distraction, especially with numerous incidences of him looking at non-academic material.  

Translation – Quit reading fanfics in class

Stephanie: You should be pleased to know that Miss Brown consistently keeps the well-being of her peers in mind. This semester, she launched a meal initiative for students whose needs could not be met by the school cafeteria. While we value her good intentions, she has been causing hallway obstructions and there are some regulatory concerns that we need to discuss. 

Translation – She sold pancakes in the halls without a permit

Cassandra: Although Miss Cain is relatively quiet in class, she continues to blow me away with her breadth of knowledge not just on class materials, but also interpersonal details. While this is a good skill to cultivate, we ask that she dial it back especially with our faculty. Additionally, please remember that the teacher's lounge is a staff-only space and students should remain in the common areas. 

Translation – She knows too much

Barbara: Miss Gordon is easily one of the best AP Computer Science students I've seen in my twenty years of teaching. She even went above and beyond the scope of our class to apply what we've learned to a greater school context. While that is deserving of credit, I'd also like to remind her that, in the future, certain ideas should be subjected to careful consideration before actions are taken. 

Translation – She hacked the lunch menu to make every day French Fry Friday 

Harper: Miss Row has a remarkable aptitude for the engineering process that exceeds beyond what students her age can typically grasp, and she is very inventive in her own right. That being said, I would appreciate it if she followed our lesson plans more closely and reviewed our guidelines for woodshop safety so everyone can continue to have a positive experience.

Translation – She made a working crossbow out of popsicle sticks

Carrie: Miss Kelley is a bright student who brings positive energy that is very much needed, especially in morning classes. However, she's been falling behind with several missing assignments at this point, and her explanations for why she cannot finish her work don't seem to be sufficient. 

Translation – "Killer Croc ate my homework" Yeah and I'm Batman

Kate: Miss Kane seems to be very eager to move forward to the next stage of her life, as evidenced by her Career Day presentation. While I believe young people should be free to explore their passions, I also think that Kate would benefit from some workshops outlining more feasible options. 

Translation – "Get bitches" isn't a career goal

Alfred: Mr. Pennyworth is easily one of the best students this institution has seen, both in his academic record and extracurricular activities. He recently expressed interest in the sharpshooting team, which I will not discourage him from, seeing how highly accurate he is. As of this year, I will be retiring as the coach for the team, but I wish him all the best.

Translation – I'm not about to get on his bad side

Selina: Miss Kyle's resourcefulness continues to astound me. Earlier in the semester, she forgot her locker combination and quickly improvised a mechanism to safely unlock it using only the materials around her. The speed and accuracy with which she did that will surely benefit her in the future. 

Translation – Did... did she just pick a lock with another lock?

Bruce: No further comments. 

Translation – whatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuck—

[zepskies]

Podcast Interview With Idling in the Impala: "Y/N and Let Y/N…"

Here we go! Sandra and Kasey, the lovely hosts of @idlingintheimpalapodcast — the podcast for all things SPN and fanfiction — invited me on the pod for an interview…

We chatted about Dean Winchester and Jensen Ackles’ early roles, the best and worst seasons of SPN, the joys and pains of writing Soldier Boy, and much, much more.

That’s right, there be some hot takes coming in this convo, and I had an absolute blast with these two! (And like I said in Sunday's announcement, I’m also putting my name and my voice out there for the first time! 😆)

So if any of that sounds interesting, feel free to dive in!

(**Important Note: Just to preface, we recorded this back in June, so it was before I posted certain stories or even started developing Lost on You. It was also when Tumblr activity/engagement was going through a spring/summer slowdown lol.

Links to all the fics and podfics we mentioned are at the end of this post.)

Have a listen: ⤵️

Interview Timestamps –

(Plus fic recs, SPN writer shoutouts, and more!)

1:44 – Who’s your guy: Sam or Dean?

3:35 – Getting into Supernatural for the first time (and seeing “Deanisms” in Jensen’s early roles).

10:15 – We debate the best and worst seasons of SPN: talking Mary Winchester, the British MOL, MOC Dean vs. Demon Dean, Chuck/God villainy, “jump the shark” moments, and that ending.

30:29 – Favorite SPN characters besides Sam and Dean.

32:34 – Writing fanfiction, joining Tumblr, and writing reader inserts vs. OCs.

38:05 – To “Y/N” or not “Y/N,” and the power of 2nd person. (**Disclaimer: Despite my hot take on this, I’ve loved a lot of stories by authors who use Y/N in reader insert stories.

Also, if I’m remembering the book You and its characters incorrectly forgive me, it’s been like 5 years since I read it lol.) 

51:00 – Favorite fanfic tropes in romance, the joys and challenges of writing Soldier Boy (AKA: the Original Asshole), and attempting to humanize Ben in Break Me Down.

Shoutout to @deans-spinster-witch always for giving me the inspiration to write BMD. 💚

Why We Love The Boys – A review of Supes Ain’t Always Heroes

1:07:57 – Engaging with readers, tips on increasing engagement, optimizing your Tumblr blog, writing schedules and processes, and incorporating reader feedback into stories.

1:26:38 – Sandra graciously narrated Midnight Espresso (Dean Winchester x Plus-sized Latina!Reader). We chat about what sparked the idea for the ME-verse, self-representation in fanfic, feeding Dean, loving Dean, and writing about culture and ethnicity in the fandom space.

1:38:26 – Chatting about the inspirations behind Smoke Eater, a firefighter!Dean AU; law enforcement procedurals, House MD, and researching for stories.

1:44:30 – Which Jackles character is the easiest or most fun to write?

1:47:39 – The challenges of writing Sam vs. Dean.

1:53:15 – Shoutouts! To some of my favorite SPN authors. I could only remember a few people off the top of my head (stupid me), but I love all of you!!

@waynes-multiverse @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior @luci-in-trenchcoats @rizlowwritessortof @waywardxwords

@deanwinchesterswitch @deanbrainrotwritings @deanwritings @spnbabe67 @thatonewriter15

@justagirlinafandomworld @kaleldobrev @artyandink @princessmisery666 @wayward-dreamer (– and many more.)

2:00:40 – How I came up with my username.

2:05:04 – Kasey’s Secret Question…

2:07:38 – Advice to fanfic writers and creatives for inspiration and/or wisdom.

2:16:35 – Sandra and Kasey’s lovely outro: self-representation in fandom, escapism, diverse voices, and more. (“Reach out a hand. Touch somebody. …Not like that.”)

📖 Fics Mentioned:

Sandra: @talltalesandbedtimestories -

Some Sunny Day Series – Dean Winchester x OFC - (I'm in the process of reading this entire series and it's been a joy to read! 💜)

Past Due – Dean Winchester x Reader

The Iceman Cometh – Dean Winchester x Reader

Cowboy Canter (Original Fiction) – Inspired by cowboyish Dean/Jensen.

Kasey: @sam-is-my-safe-word -

English Cottage-verse – Sam Winchester x Reader (I've read it and it's fantastic! 💜)

(K)not for sale – Soldier Boy x Dean Winchester

Alex (Zep/Me) -

Break Me Down – Soldier Boy/Ben x F. Reader

Midnight Espresso (& the Series Masterlist) – Dean Winchester x Plus-sized Latina!Reader

Dream With Me – Dean Winchester x Plus-sized Latina!Reader

Smoke Eater – Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. Reader

Every Second Counts – Russell Shaw x F. Reader

🎙️ Stories/Podfics Sandra has narrated for me:

Podfic Playlist

And please remember to check out all the other awesome interviews, narrated podfics, and fun topics covered by Sandra and Kasey on the Idling in the Impala Podcast!

[bbina]

between the lines ★ between the lines

⤷ from what started as a simple arrangement to hide your feelings for a certain someone by getting into in a fake relationship soon turns into a tangled mess. in which some things are hard to tell when you can’t read between the lines

 ˗ˏˋ prev | main masterlist | between the lines masterlist ˎˊ˗

★ notes .ᐟ and they lived happily ever after. words cannot express how thankful and happy i am for you all to read the journey of this little fanfic i call between the lines. it's been one hell of a long ass ride (no pun intended!) who knew this would actually take off two months ago. we've made it so far guys and we built a little community throughout it all. again, thank you sosososos fucking much for reading it this far. i've read every single comment and all of it just brings a smile to my face. as this story ends, another starts. this isn't the end for ynbin since they'll be popping up here and there with the bonus chapters and all but yeah.. i love you all so much and i'll definitely miss ynbin and the backstreet boys now that it's over IM CRY. see you guys in my next alternate universe! love, bbina <3

p.s lmk what you guys think of the whole story and other shit you always wanted to ask or tell me! now that its over i think its time for some final reviews of the whole story and how it wrapped up!

★ taglist .ᐟ @callanton @annswwa @renjuneoo @pinkraindropsfell @lecheugo @ilovejungwonandhaechan @ahnneyong @haechansbbg @snowyseungs @sseastar-main @odxrilove @leeknowarchives @onlywonb @wonychu @leehanascent @au-ghosttype @revehosh @keilovr @kyusqult @dreamyyyz @ether-yeol @yangasm @qwonbani @starwonb1n @ffixtionista @daegale @scrumptiousloser @seunghancore @koryutte @ohmykwonsoonyoung @reenfluffmarshmallow @bunni @artstaeh @yizhoutv @sie17136 @koeuh @07yujin @poollabug @vernonburger @dutifullyannoyingfox @000rpheus @wccycc @sunus-sun @highhjime @chweverni @heartlvrrss @s9nwoo @yoursyuno @rosesfortaro @lampcults

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for leaving constructive criticism on a FanFic?

I know this is such a lame problem, but Ive been reading and writing fanfic for like 15+ years so I’ve left and received my fair share of comments, some of them containing very mild constructive criticism. I personally always appreciated receiving them greatly, because to me it’s a sign that a reader is genuinely invested in what you’re writing. I’m also just very used to (much, much harsher lol) frequent artistic critique, so It’s kind of second nature to me and I’m probably not as sensitive as others are to it .

Anyways, I was reading a long ongoing fic and was absolutely loving it but noticed the author frequently switched between present and past tense , which was kind of annoying because the fic contained flashbacks so sometimes it became a little muddled and difficult to follow. I left a review that I thought was pretty unremarkable, praising the aspects of the fic I did like such as the unique plot, characterization and dialogue etc but mentioned that keeping an eye on which tense they were writing in might help the fics readability. I didn’t think anything of it but they replied a few days later basically saying ‘fuck you why you think you have the right to criticize something that I write for free in my spare time etc etc.’ Which was for sure an overreaction on their part but I’m starting to wonder if there isn’t truth to that? after all, not all fic writers are trying to improve on their writing, and maybe it’s just a “happy place” for them where they don’t want to receive criticism.

I haven’t replied yet, I’m probably just going to apologize and leave it at that. But I do want to know, do you guys think leaving mild concrit -specifically the way I did- on fanfiction is a dick move?

What are these acronyms?

[bg3ficreviews]

Thunder reforged: Rolan x Dammon - #BG3 FanFic Review

Review by Aivu (@aivuthedragon)

Happy timezone, dear readers! Today I'm happy to bring you this incredible series of works by velocitross on AO3. What's hotter than a tiefling wizard with a knack for a well-timed thunderwave? Said tiefling wizard having a rendezvous with his tiefling blacksmith paramour, of course.

A note from the BG3FicReviews team: The entire BG3 community was been rocked by the recent controversy surrounding Dammon's VA, including the various fanwork creators who've fallen in love with Dammon, included him in their work, and are part of the LGBTQAI+ community themselves. We want to express our support and love to Dammon fans, Dammon fan work creators, the LGBTQAI+ community generally and all those adversely affected by what's happened. As such, we have decided to feature such works in our reviews this week. Make your love louder than the hate. 💜

As always, mind the tags! Our review is continued below the fold due to the NSFW nature of the content in these works.

This incredible artwork by @arczism was inspired by velocitross's Rolan x Dammon fic Working Steel, which is included in today's review.

Working Steel, the first of velocitross’ three works that include this rare pair, is a masterwork in character portrayal. The author adeptly captures the at-a-glance somewhat incompatible personalities of the two tiefling refugees who fled Elturel together and now reside in Baldur’s Gate. In this work, the relationship between Rolan, the ever-surly wizard and the newly ‘appointed’ master of Ramazith Tower, and Dammon, the gentle yet infernally talented blacksmith of the Forge of the Nine, has grown far beyond mere friendship.

Rolan, frustrated by his attempts to catalogue the mindless chaos remaining after the untimely death of the tower’s former owner, approaches Dammon to ask for his help and visits him at his forge. But what could a blacksmith possibly offer a wizard? Well, a good fuck, for one thing. Rolan is pent-up, impatient, and needs a good lay. And, it turns out, so does Dammon. The smut that ensues is not only blazingly hot but also beautifully captures the tender affection between the two tieflings through not only their words, but small, unique gestures of love and care. (Mind the tails. I mean, tags. No, tails.)

In Up in the Tower, it’s Dammon’s turn to visit the wizard’s domain. But the blacksmith receives a less-than-warm welcome, as the ever-grumpy Rolan becomes highly annoyed at having his work interrupted. But considering Rolan is dressed in little more than his underwear and an open robe, I’m more than willing to forgive him for his surliness. Dammon, however, being the sweet, gentle soul that he is, insists on taking care of Rolan beyond his carnal needs alone. In this work, the relationship between the pair deepens, and the author has wonderfully captured the intimacy of the pair. Lastly, we have Within the Storm. This work takes us back to the Shadow-Cursed Lands as the tiefling refugees attempt to cross its desolate lands on their way to Baldur’s Gate. When the Absolute’s forces ambush the group, Rolan expertly wields his magic to stave them off. But when something happens to Zevlor, the battle takes a turn for the worse. In the chaos, Rolan’s siblings, Cal and Lia, are kidnapped and several of his friends and co-travellers are brutally murdered.

Once at Last Light Inn, Rolan is a fucking mess, devastated by his siblings’ capture. Lost in the depths of his despair and way too much drink, the tiefling wizard finds comfort in the arms of a fellow refugee he’d known since childhood - Dammon. And thus the gentlest embers of affection between the pair begin to spark to life. This lovely one-shot serves as a prelude to the author’s much-anticipated long fic about the pair, their growing affection for one another and what looks to be a truly beautiful love story. If you would like to follow velocitross’ incredible work about the love between a tiefling wizard and blacksmith, please be sure to subscribe to the author on AO3 and follow their work and the pending long fic. We have included a snippet of Working Steel below for your enjoyment. As always, please support the writers of our incredible fandom by leaving kudos and comments on their work. 🫶

------------------

Working Steel

By velocitross on AO3

The ring of his hammer fills Dammon’s ears and his attention as he works. A soft frown of focus curves his lips. It’s a simple enough repair—restoring a blade for the halfling woman standing outside the forge watching him work. Still, there’s a satisfaction to it: the rhythm of his strikes, the heat of the day in Baldur’s Gate warming him beneath his layers of apron and clothing. The ordinary busy noise of the city goes on just outside his focus, a subtle, stabilizing comfort even months after the Netherbrain’s defeat.

When he glances up from his work, a distinct figure catches his eye amongst the passersby. Rolan, with his proud bearing and his regal blue and red robes, coming toward the smithy with a tense, bothered scowl and his tail lashing behind him. A smile touches Dammon’s lips. He knows that look.

“I’ll be with you in a moment,” he says as Rolan comes to a stop an awkward few feet from the halfling waiting on her sword.

“Well, don’t take too long,” Rolan snaps, and then reddens further when Dammon raises an eyebrow at him. “Sorry. I’ll just—I’ll wait.”

Dammon lifts the blade off his anvil to study it. He smiles at the halfling as he passes her the sword.

“Give that a try. Come back if you need anything else.”

She moves off to the side to examine the blade, allowing Rolan to step up to the forge. He stands, arms crossed, his face flushed as he fixes Dammon with his bright yellow stare.

“Anything I can help you with, Rolan?” the blacksmith prompts.

Rolan sighs. He places his hands carefully on the edge of the anvil, glances again toward the halfling woman, and leans in toward Dammon.

“I need . . . Steel.”

Dammon breathes a good-natured chuckle.

“Come on,” he says, nodding over his shoulder toward the building. “I could use a break, anyway.”

[seriiousgiirl]

Sweet Juice

Severus Snape x Alumni!reader.

NFSW! Basically (fluffy) smut with a massive plot. //! Incorrect use of Potions.

Severus is 30 years old in this fic, you are 23, minor age gap. 

Summary: Ever since your youth, you were passionate about the art of Potions. Luckily, during your time at Hogwarts, you found a mentor in the strict and cold Professor Snape. Having made a habit of spending hours after class talking to him, all of this came to an abrupt end during your final year. Leaving you in a total mystery, with no answers.  It was only years later that you took your revenge, in the hope of moving on. Not suspecting that it would bring you face to face with your deepest desires. 

A/N: I admit I could have turned this into a multi-chapter fanfic, but I figured that would break the rhythm, so enjoy this long read! This fic is inspired by ‘Sweet Juice’ by Purple Kiss, go stream it for a better life! Trust me (;

Word count: 14k. (hehe)

"Ah- Miss Y/f/n, please accept this price. It is an honour to be able to reward young talents like yourself." The little cup was hurriedly placed in your hands.

"It is an honour to be awarded with this prestigious prize," You politely thanked the crowd.

Your eyes lingered on the name of the prize, ‘Research & Development, winner of the best potion of the year'. And without even realising it, your lips drew a somewhat smug smile. Standing upright, ready to have your photo done, to appear in the next edition of the Daily Prophet, with pride, you held the cup in your hands. In that busy room, you were the youngest. And yet, you are the one who has been praised for your achievements. Earning jealous glares from the potion makers, who coveted it as much as you did.

"Miss, can you tell us more about your potion, how did you get the idea?" You were asked, for what you guessed was now an actual interview.

"I wanted to be able to help the Wizards and Witches to unwind more easily, it is sometimes difficult to let go of work pressure and its boredom. That is why I decided to study Amortentia, and its derivations, in order to create a potion capable of releasing in us the hormones necessary to enjoy ourselves... Without the negative effects of the ancient Potions." You explained, in the simplest way possible to the journalists.

"So it's a potion that gets you aroused?" One adds.

You frowned, a little offended by this shortcut, "Yes, in theory, but it goes deeper than that. Otherwise, I wouldn't be rewarded today. But if you want to know, you have to taste it... All the reviews have been very positive." You commented, with a wink. 

To summarise months, almost a whole year of research, is almost an insult to your work. Amortentia is one of the most dangerous potions. Studying it to the point of understanding its mechanism and removing the obsession it causes, was the greatest achievement of the process. The rest was just a series of experiments, an understanding of the human body and its hormones, and it was done. 

The result was prodigious, it brought a sense of relaxation, without the risk of an eternal sleep like the Draught of Peace. Comfort and love, without the risk of being manipulated by an evil liquid. And then, depending on the quantity used, the effects could be more or less intense, but never dangerous. Quite remarkable, considering all the side effects that most Potions could provide. 

You deserve your reward tonight for many reasons, no one else has been able to do it in the past.

“Have you always held an interest in the subject?" The interview proceeded, to have some content for the beloved magazine.

"Yes, since my school days at Hogwarts. I quickly found a vocation in the subject, expressing my talents at an early age.” You paused, before continuing, "But it would never have been possible without the support of my teacher and mentor, Severus Snape, who taught me everything. His talent is second to none, and next to it, I am nobody, even after tonight." You humbly added, with another smile.

At the end of this sentence, your eyes searched for a certain dark silhouette. 

Unlike earlier, that smile was particularly forced on your lips. To say that he had supported you was a fine lie. While at first he was indeed ‘supporting’ you (more like a tolerating you), graciously accepting you to attend his prestigious private Potion club, the entirety of your last year was a failure. 

In your first years, you never had to face his wrath and nasty comments, simply because he couldn't blame you for anything. Your work was perfect, from theory to application. But to him, you were nothing.

With time, and your growing skills, things changed. There was a time when you even assumed that an understanding had developed between the two of you, you were not friends, it was impossible with such a man, but it wasn’t nothing either. Eventually, the discussions after class or the club, sharing theories and experiences, became quite regular. Sometimes up to dinner hour, and even after curfew, the time went by so quickly in these periods, as neither of you paid attention, caught up in the interaction. After all, the discussions were very entertaining, between two Potions enthusiasts, and you gained a lot of knowledge from them.

Perhaps because you had succeeded to raise his esteem for you, Professor Snape, during class, would give you one of his infrequent compliments on your methods, or provide you with advice while experiencing in the club. Over time, you came to really treasure this exclusive ‘bond’, with such a cold and distant person. It would be a lie to say that in every class, your shared private discussions weren't the moment you were most looking forward to. You felt special.

You couldn't remember exactly when or how this routine started, it had developed naturally during the end of your fifth year and lasted all the way through to the sixth. However, you could remember bitterly how it had ended. 

By the start of your final year at Hogwarts, a cold shoulder from Professor Snape had begun to creep between the two of you. He no longer commented on your work, or even dared to give you one of his rare compliments. It was simply as if you didn't even exist. This drastic change was particularly noticeable when you tried to revive another discussion after class, only to be rejected. 'I don't have time Miss Y/f/n', 'I've got too much work', 'Go, and revise', these were, obviously, bland excuses. 

You had spent time thinking about it, trying to understand this radical change, but nothing could be found. The discussions had never overflowed on personal information, at least on his side, you - You had been more talkative. And again, nothing major, just simple information like your preferences in terms of flowers, cake flavours, and favourite literature. It never looked like it bothered him to listen to you, and yet strangely enough it seemed to interest him. But, in the end, most of the talk was about Potions, nothing odd that should have ended it all brutally.

In the course of your discussions, you had always expressed an interest in a career in the field, and Professor Snape had consequently supported you (in his own way) in this idea. In all honesty, having his approval really encouraged you. Until, once again, your senior year. While you had been able to get decent, if not perfect, results up to this point, the downfall continued when you saw your grades drop for unfair reasons. You had never witnessed his unfair grading, but when you became one of his victims, he was unforgiving towards your harmless mistakes. It was as if he was trying to ruin your future career as a potion maker.

All this unjustified hatred, discouraged you, but not to the point of giving up your aspiration, otherwise you wouldn't be standing there with the precious prize in your hands. 

Was it some kind of revenge? Definitely. 

Mentioning Severus in your ‘thank you speech’ was perfectly legitimate, he had given you more than anyone else in your life. But, even though you kept telling yourself that it was already 3 years ago and it belonged to the past, your heart was still broken, disappointed. And by his presence tonight, you were hoping to finally put an end to it all. Snape had witnessed your happiness, you had won, the revenge was completed. Time to move on. 

However, it was easier to convince yourself than to apply it. It would be wrong to claim that you hadn't worked hard to impress him. Ever since that cold war between you two, no matter how strange it may seem, you couldn't get over it. 

Sometimes, in your most private moments, you would close your eyes in the hope of being able to remember. The damp smell of the dungeons invading your nostrils, your teacher's deep voice echoing within the cold walls to your ears, praising you how well you had worked. His dark eyes focused on you, and only you. In fact, the intensity of his dark gaze could suffocate you, and yet you would not care. You desperately wanted to reclaim that relationship, as someone to whom he would give his precious time, where he would share his passions anew, a time when in his mind you existed and were important. And no matter how embarrassing it was, the idea of finding pleasure in these memories was enough to make your knickers wet.

At the time, you had convinced yourself that you were not holding any affection regarding your Professor… Another fine lie from you, obviously. It had taken a few years to come to this conclusion, to get out of the denial of this forbidden love. But now it was clear and explained a lot concerning your addiction and pain. The feeling of anticipation at the end of each lesson, the way you would pour your soul into the subject in the hope of receiving a ‘compliment’... Or simply the way you kept seeking for his attention, even after years. Nothing about this behaviour was appropriate, regardless how hard you tried to maintain the classic student-teacher relationship, on your own. 

Perhaps Snape had even realised this, explaining the sudden cessation of your individual time together. 

And even though, with hindsight, you should have felt guilty, you couldn't throw away that attachment. It was as if he had put a spell on you, that the lack of contact with him since you graduated from Hogwarts had reinforced that love. 

But today was different, it was your revenge, your mourning over this period of your life. 

The sound of the camera flashes snapped you out of your thoughts. The lights blinded your eyes for a moment, and you blinked frantically to regain your sight. Hoping that the pictures would look nice on the magazine...

"Well, congratulations Miss Y/f/n, we hope to see your Potion soon on the market amongst our merchants. I can’t wait to taste it, as you have suggested." The interview ended on this note, and the journalists dismissed themselves to make room for those who wished to thank you or congratulate you in person. 

Thus, you were greeted with a new wave of questions, of praises, mostly it was older wizards and witches who were attending the event, and thus more 'experienced' than you in Potions. Their words tasted like hypocrisy, but you accepted everything with a polite smile. You actually enjoyed the attention, although deep down it was a particular Potions Master you were looking for, so it all went over your head. After a few moments you managed to escape from the conversation that had been built around the right to use the Felix Felixis at the Ministry's work, to get yourself a glass of alcohol from the buffet. 

The taste of alcohol eased your nerves, rejoicing in the moment of calm you just gave yourself after all the attention you received. But the moment was short.

“Miss Y/f/n. How fortuitous to find you here." A voice commented sarcastically on your presence at the bar. 

There was no need to look up at the person speaking to you because you already knew who he was. His deep voice was like a melody, a music composed by the finest musicians of this world. How, Merlin, you truly missed it…

“Professor Snape- Hum, or should I say Severus now that we are colleagues?” You answered him a little too smoothly for your taste, One drink and my anger is already forgotten? I need to get my act together!

“Snape will do, we are not direct colleagues. Let's keep some formality.” He replied somewhat distantly. Ouch- Years did not seem to have quieted the hatred he had against you.

You had not yet looked up to him, postponing the moment when you would be blessed with his physical presence. But you could see from the corner of your eye that he was pouring himself a shot glass of what seemed to be a fire whiskey.

"I must say that I am surprised that the award was given to you tonight... However, it would be wrong not to congratulate you." Severus began slowly, as if preventing himself from saying too much. “But…”

“But?” Your voice cut him off, a mixture of excitement and sheer joy at the thought of receiving praise from your dear Professor. This special praise you had been longing for. 

"But-” He sighed as if you had annoyed him, “I object to the fact that my teachings have led you to produce such a grotesque Potion." 

If your eyes had been glued to your glass since the beginning of the conversation fearing to feel butterflies in your stomach at the sight of Severus, you suddenly raised them, eyes wide with surprise. And in your stomach, anger. How dare he humiliate my work like that?

However, you were at a loss for words. He hadn't changed at all, he hadn't even made the effort to wear another suit for the event. He remained the same man as when you left him. Your eyes fell on his face, he had a neutral expression, as if his hurtful words were the most well-deserved ones. His eyes were on you, but because of the dim light and his dark pupils it was impossible for you to discern any judgement within. Otherwise, his hair was still the same length, falling gently over his shoulders, soft… His hooked nose made him look sterner than ever, and the crease between his over-frowned eyebrows did not seem to have increased.

He was still the same man, the one you were so fond of, and that made it more difficult. 

But it was as if you two had evolved in two different time spaces. It had only been two years since you left Hogwarts, and it was certain that the occasional times you ran into a former classmate, they all had trouble recognising you. Obviously, you have grown in maturity through your work. You were no longer a young girl, you were a woman, a lady, with stature and respect. You were even certain that if your name wasn't mentioned at your prize-giving, Severus wouldn't have known who you are. 

"A grotesque potion?” You took back his words, insulted, “You know perfectly well all the work that lies behind it. I explained it in a briefing for the association. You must have read it, right?" You tried to hide the irritation in your voice.

"I read it, of course. And although I must admit that it was all a tremendous amount of hard work... All these efforts, for such a clownish result, is disappointing."

You couldn't help but stare at him in disbelief. You were supposed to be the one to get your revenge tonight. And here you are, in the shoes of the student you used to be in your last year, being jeered for your hard work. His words were harsh, and perhaps because they came from your professor, they hurt you badly. 

"The mere fact that I am the one who taught you everything is even more terrible." He added nonchalantly, bringing his glass to his lips. 

You remained quiet, thinking of all the things you could say to him. After all, he was no longer your instructor, Severus no longer had superiority over you. What can he do now, if I snapped at him? Expel me from Hogwarts? Perhaps, it was the moment for you to confess everything that was weighing on your heart. How his coldness and distance had made you miserable. 

"I thought it was only fair to thank you in my speech." You retorted, "But as far as I can see, you don't even want to be associated with me anymore, even as a mere tutor. Your hatred of me, I don't know where it comes from, but it's all unfair. This was supposed to be my special night. But now you've ruined it.” You hesitated before speaking again, “Like you’ve ruined my seventh year at Hogwarts."

Severus’ face remained as neutral as ever, but in his posture you felt a kind of irritation, he was caught off guard by your curt reply. Well, he must understand that I won't take his nastiness easily anymore. 

However, you took no pleasure in giving him this answer. You had imagined many scenarios about your reunion... You had hoped that he would apologise, show that he felt sorry for having been cold to you, and in the more realistic scenario simply shake your hand, congratulate you and that was it. In no way, had you expected that he would remain so hostile. 

A heavy silence fell between the two of you. His lack of response bothered you further, so you grabbed your glass and finished it straight down. "I'm going to get some air, if anyone is looking for me." Your voice was less angry, as your throat tightened dangerously, poised to burst into tears and it was slightly audible. It was a disaster.

You took your trophy with great care, the only thing that gave you comfort, and left without even bowing to Severus. You were never going to see him again in your life anyway. 

The evening of the association for Potions makers of Great Britain (or simply those with an interest for the discipline), was held in the large manor house of the current Chairman. After escaping from the hall where the main event was taking place, you looked for a way out to the garden. Your heels clicked on the marble floor, echoing in the various empty corridors. The laughter and voices of the party began to fade with each step you took. 

You were getting away from these jealous and condescending people and above all, from Severus. Good, you didn't feel like crying miserably in front of everyone. Your hopes were already destroyed, your ego wasn't going to be the next crime. After a moment, you spotted a windowed door leading to the backyard and quickly rushed to open it, taking a deep breath of air in desperation. 

Stepping out completely, you were pleasantly surprised to discover the lovely atmosphere. The garden was well tended with bushes of various flowers and the grass was green and healthy, while lanterns lightened the path leading to the depths of the garden. You were caught up in the sense of peace and quiet that it gave you, feeling much more comfortable on your own. 

It was summer, late August, school was beginning soon, work was about to restart and the merchants would soon be back in business. But it was already late, the moon was already high in the sky, almost full, and the stars shone brightly in the country sky away from London's city lights. The air was a bit fresh, but cold enough to get your mind back in order without freezing in your evening gown, which was quite revealing… But still elegant and pretty.

Venturing into the garden you finally found a bench to settle down on and think about what just happened, alone. Your eyes lifted to the magnificent starry sky before you, and its darkness made you think of Severus... The way his pupils were fixed on you, the image replayed in your mind... Over and over. You wanted to despise him for his behaviour, he had broken your heart! Not to feed your already distracted mind with lusty thoughts. Did he, at least, appreciate the sight of me in this dress? Your mind began to wander in a dangerous area, and you needed to stop right now.  

Severus had been nothing but spiteful, he hadn't changed for sure, whether it was physically or mentally. And yet... You couldn't hate him in the slightest. It all seemed wrong on his part, as if he was forcing himself. Pushing you away. 

You sighed, it was truly a disaster, you were frustrated with Severus, with yourself. Tonight was about revenge, moving on was the main mission and now you were fantasising all over again, like the flame of your love had been rekindled. 

A tear rolled down your cheek from sheer frustration, disappointment in yourself. Then one tear broke into a silent cry. Were you doomed to love a man you will never see again, who is out of reach and seems to be loathing you? Put like this, it was as if you enjoyed suffering. 

Now, you had no desire to return to the house with the other members, the possibility of running into Snape again and worsening your mental state, made you dread the prospect. Great, he had won and definitely broken your heart. 

It was decided, you were going to stay there, with your trophy in your arms and with a bit of luck you will be able to leave unnoticed by floo powder. The plan seemed reasonable. 

But fate seemed to have decided otherwise. 

You jumped when you heard someone cough to get your attention. You were so deep in thought, your eyes fixed on the sky, that you didn't hear anyone approaching you. Your little moment of peace had been ruined, and you frowned as your eyes fell on the culprit. Severus’ brooding silhouette in the darkness of the garden lived up to his Hogwarts reputation as a bat. 

You sniffed, "What are you doing here? Go away. You've already hurt me enough, there's no need to make it worse, I heard your nasty comments once already." In your pathetic state you asked Severus rather rudely to leave. 

There was a small silence before it was broken by his voice, "Are you crying?"

You couldn't make out his face, so you concluded that he couldn't see yours either. You hesitated between telling the truth or lying before answering, “Why do you care…?” Your voice was weak, in no way hiding the truth. 

“I asked you a question, Y/n” He persisted.

Hearing his voice pronounce your first name, as he used to do when you were in private conversation, made you weak in the knees, much more than you would have liked to acknowledge. 

"I, hum... Yes." You replied, sobbing quietly. Resistance will only make things worse. 

"It's a wonder you've managed to make a respectable place for yourself in the business, with such a weak mind." But unlike earlier his voice was gentler, firm, but gentle. "I've talked a bit with some of your fellow peers, people who have been around you for the past few years. Supporting you in carrying out your work… Believing in this project of yours.” He paused for another moment. 

You didn't know what he was getting at, confusion all over your face. The people you had surrounded yourself with for work were not in attendance tonight. They were mostly former students just like yourself, who had attended the advanced Potions class. If they were absent tonight it is because in their research of Potions, unlike you, they had not managed to produce a viable solution. 

In the darkness, you discerned him taking his place beside you on the bench. The warmth of his body spreading over your arm, allows you to evaluate how close you were to each other. And the answer was easy, very close. You could smell the light scent of his fragrance, a bit musky, the bare skin of your arm was grazing against the thick fabric of his frock coat, and it was a miracle that he was still able to breathe under all those layers in this warm weather. You noticed that it was the first time he was so close to you, usually he would keep his distance. His desk or the potions station had always been a well-respected barrier between the two of you. And thus, it made you a bit timid.

"Well, talking…” He spoke sarcastically to rectify himself, “I’ve exchanged letters with them. Checking on my former students, those you are working with now. Ensuring that everything was going well for you." He emphasised the last part of his sentence. 

And Severus doesn't need to amplify his words, for you to understand what he was implying secretly. 

Severus had checked on you, taking news through his letters over the past two years. 

Each of his words hit you straight in the heart, making it pound faster each time. You thanked Merlin for the obscurity, because between your tears that must have drenched your makeup and the crimson spreading over your cheeks, the sight must be pretty dramatic. 

"Why didn't you send an owl directly to me?" Your voice was still weak, but your tears had ceased. You ran your delicate hand over your cheeks to remove the remaining tears. 

You heard Severus sigh quietly at your question. It took him a while to answer, as if he was tortured to answer honestly or lying, hesitating in the same way you did a few moments ago with his question. “It’s complicated.” Severus opted to be vague, "In any case, I've got nothing but praise for your work or even your person... They like you just the same as they did back at Hogwarts."

You didn't know if your mind was playing tricks on you by wanting to romanticise everything, but in his voice there was a faint hint of nostalgia. Severus' note brought a smile to your lips, "I'm glad to hear that, I appreciate them as well. At least they're not hypocrites like everyone else tonight..." Your honesty seemed to catch what sounded like a quiet chuckle from your former Professor. 

"I must grant you, Y/n... That my words were harsh against you." Severus' voice regained its usual firm tone, "But I must confess, that such a potion, with such utility, surprises me coming from you."

That was what you guessed, his form of apology, and you accepted the way it was. "It is true that in my youth I never showed any interest in Healing Potions. What interested me the most were Poisons... But Amortentia is a poison like any other, in its own way, and research can lead us to expand our minds, can't they?” The fact that Severus knew perfectly your preferences in the area, made it easier to explain. "And then, with hindsight, I'm proud that my invention helps people, rather than killing them."

Severus nodded quietly, indicating that he fully understood the meaning of your words, as you had hoped he would. He seemed to remember all the information you had told him about yourself three years ago. That made you more than happy.  

“‘Sweet juice’, that's how you named it?” He spoke with sarcasm, gently mocking. 

It was your turn to sweetly chuckle, “No! I had originally named it 'Aquae dulcis', from the Latin ‘peaceful liquid’... But for the promotion, I was advised to change the name to a more sales-oriented one, which would fit better with my image as a lady.”

"I was wondering why the name doesn't match you… I've got my answer." He sounded somewhat relieved, "Many people have mentioned the taste." Severus sounded less reticent over your Potion, it was even if he was aware of the feedbacks that were provided in order to boost the pre-sales. 

"Ah- yes, the taste... That's what gives the potion its reputation for being arousing." You sighed a little embarrassed to talk about this with him, “Unlike many Potions, with a disgusting taste… Mine is sweet. The liquid drips slowly down the throat, the taste hooked up everyone wishing to take it. The feeling is strange to describe, and actually I can’t… Like a flame, it all burns, it all gets on, the throat-burning sensation is taboo.” You added the last part of your sentence in a whisper due to the embarrassing nature of your language. It sounded sexual, you must admit. 

Again there was silence and you wished you hadn't said what you revealed about this special taste, fearing that you had gone too far and brought your former teacher into equal discomfort. 

But he answered with an unexpected thought, “I’m curious about the experience.” You caught your breath surprised, not even realising that you had stopped for a moment out of fear,  "No potions so far have managed to ease my nerves. The Draught of Peace made me feel like I was too tired to continue working properly, so I stopped years ago. And if there's one time when I'm extremely irritable, it's at work, or when I'm grading papers… Especially when I grade the papers.” It was as if Severus was 'justifying' himself for wishing to try it. But deep down, some peace would only do him good. 

"Only a few drops then, otherwise you'll regret the tiredness you got from the Draught of Peace when you'll feel aroused during your teaching." Even yourself was surprised by the bold words you used.

Thankfully Severus took less time to answer than last time, "Of course. I'll be careful. I'll give you a personal feedback on my impressions over the next few days following the start of term."

"Send the owl directly to me this time, it would be unfortunate if anyone found out you had an 'uncomfortable issue' because of my Potion." You laughed softly, clearly more comfortable around him. You were both adults now, fellow colleagues in the Potions discipline, you have the right to tease him about the unwanted side effects.

Well, unwanted for Severus’ case. You knew that many were looking forward to taking bigger doses... Precisely to get horny. 

“I will Y/n,” He answered in a tone that seemed to be almost as amused. 

“So… You want it, you want some Sweet Juice?” You ask him, hardly believing that you were asking Severus Snape, your cold former professor, if he wanted a stash of your own (arousing) Potion. 

"If you don't mind, as it will only be sold on the mid-September market, if I understand correctly. I will, of course, pay for anything you may want to send me." He firmly says, 

You shook your head sharply, "Absolutely not, I'll send you these for free as a thank-you. And before school starts, so everything will be ready for you to face those annoying and incompetent first years." 

Severus sighs, a mixture of exasperation and relief. Exasperation because you were strict about him not paying you for anything, relief at the idea of finally having a solution to calm his tense nerves. “Stubborn as ever, I see. You may have changed physically, mentally you’re still the same.”

His little statement had the power to make your cheeks even more flushed. So he noticed that I had changed… That I’m now a lady. “Thank you, I guess?” You had no idea how to reply to that. 

"That's a compliment.” He clarified for you, “You are, indeed, now… Excuse my choice of words- a pretty woman. But besides your appearance, you are blossoming in what you always dreamed of, with a remarkable career start. It's a good thing you've kept parts of yourself intact, fame must not go to your head. But you are a reasonable lady, I know everything will be fine." It was Severus' turn to be a bit awkward with his words.

His compliment went straight to your heart and seemed to soothe all the pain you had felt over the last few years. However, in his tone, Severus sounded as if he wanted to keep his words strictly formal, as he had always done even in your deepest discussions in the past. 

"Thank you Severu- Hm, Snape.” You hated how easy it was for you to say his first name, when he had just corrected you a few moments before. However, he didn't correct you this time, letting that minor error slide. 

You indulged in the peaceful silence that settled between the two of you. The way the conversation had progressed was comparable to the ones you had in the past, if not more comfortable. Two enthusiasts discussing about their favourite subject, trying to understand each other's opinion with respect and interest. Obviously, a formal one, Severus always maintains his distance from you, as if he was always your Professor and couldn't afford to be more. Your hopes were not high on a potential romance with Severus, he was older, your former teacher, mysterious… In the end you know nothing about the man and his job was keeping him busy all year long. However, a friend would be a good start… A rather affordable hope.

In the end, when Severus opted not to act cold, it was as if there hadn't been a rupture in your relationship. The chemistry had returned back in a flash. It made you bitterly regret those three lost years... Besides, you still had no idea of the exact nature of his past harsh attitude. Maybe even tonight was just an exception and the question will never be answered.

However, if Severus ever decided, as he had suggested with his impressions, to exchange letters, perhaps with time you would find the courage to ask him. Now, it would be a bad idea and would ruin the calm atmosphere. 

"Maybe it's time to get back to the party..." Severus offered, his voice not exactly enthusiastic about joining the festivities again as well, "The others will wonder when they notice our absence."

“Right, It would be unfortunate if they started to wonder about our connection..." You laughed lightly, mocking his constant worry about being paired with you. Severus huffed, outraged. 

He stood up, and in the half-light you saw him offering his arm to you, like a gentleman. You took it without hesitation, linking yours to his.

"It's been pleasing tonight…” You spoke quietly, as Severus escorted you back into the manor.

He inhaled shakily before answering, "Yes, I agree. And hearing from you, - personally - is always preferable. I hope this will last in your future letters." 

You smiled at his words, "Obviously, Severus." There was a deep fondness evident in your voice. This time you couldn't help it, saying his first name felt right, and he didn't correct you either. 

-

The October leaves had just fallen, the soft light with its morning rays of sunshine was reaching into your office. The scenery was quiet, peaceful even. And even though you had no reason to be in your office this early, you were waiting for a special occurrence. 

Sweet Juice' had been on the market for almost a month, at various shops in Hogsmeade and Diagon Alley, and sales were more than encouraging. In fact, it was a real success. Some minor stock-outs caused even a panic among the sellers when they couldn't satisfy their demanding customers. Everyone was talking about the benefits of your Potion, and how it changed their life.

The money you received was considerable, allowing you to take a break. After two years of hard work, you deserved it. And a new solution cannot be invented that easily anyway. So your days were pretty uneventful, sometimes you were occupied with checking in with the producer, the one you had trusted enough to share the secrets of your mixture, and the sales. Otherwise, most of your days were spent taking care of yourself, enjoying life and, above all, waiting for Severus' letters. 

Currently in your hands, the last letter you received, already dated from the previous week. The other letters, which numbered five, were neatly folded and kept in the first drawer of your desk. Severus' handwriting was as elegant and delicate as ever, and you took great comfort in receiving them. The content was kept formal, but somewhat ‘casual’ or ‘friendly’. Which was a good development. 

The letters were quite brief and mostly structured the same way. Severus would write about his thoughts on Potions, then about his days at Hogwarts, and finally he would reply directly to the contents of the letter he had just received, making his comments on your daily life. 

In each of his answers, you could tell that he was making the effort to maintain the relationship despite the distance. When the first correspondence started, you were quite surprised to see his owl on your windowsill within less than a week. You were pleasantly surprised, expecting to receive a response within a relatively long delay. To be honest, you weren't expecting this much from him, because you know how occupied he is.

Your eyes lingered on the contents of the one you held in your hands. 

Dear Y/n, 

Thank you for the new batch of Potions you have sent me.

I would like to use it sparingly, addiction would be regrettable. So I take precautions, even though the peaceful effect it brings me is always efficient. Being able to sleep properly is, I must confess, a luxury I had not enjoyed until recently. And it's all thanks to you. 

I would say my days at Hogwarts are bearable. Work is draining, as always. 

I hadn’t found a moment to read the book you recommended. I will try to make up for it before my next answer. 

However, I am glad to hear that you are taking the time to have a break. Don't worry if the days can be boring, and you miss work, you need it. Do not become like me, please.

Yours faithfully, 

Severus Snape,

You had lost count, you must have read the contents of the letter ten times already. In fact, every letter you received from Severus was read more than once. It was a forbidden pleasure, but seeing his words specifically directed at you, gives you butterflies in your insides. 

But, you put your mind at rest with the fact that they were just letters and nothing more. It was less severe than when you were seeing him daily, in your student days. It was impossible for Severus to even guess the depth of your feelings towards him, when the only contact the two of you had was a piece of paper and a few words. You weren't likely to offend him or make him feel uneasy with your feelings towards him. So you were living your affection for this man to the fullest in the privacy of your own home. 

Leaning back in your desk chair, while your mind wandered over Hogwarts’ dungeon bat, you heard a tiny clatter against your window. Looking up, a sweet smile came to your lips. Your hands folded the current letter you were reading, folding it carefully and storing it away before standing up to retrieve the new one you had been expecting. 

Severus' owl was just like him, black plumage, piercing eyes. The only thing they did not have in common was their sweetness. When you opened your window, you were immediately greeted by a warm hooting.

“Hey, I hope the journey wasn't too long.” Your voice was almost too mellow for just an owl, and your hand gently stroked the top of its head as you greeted back. With a smile, you carefully untied the letter from its grasp. Once done, you put the envelope on your desk and collected grains to feed the owl. The owl pecked into the palm of your hand, now used to this small ritual. A hoot of gratitude indicated that the mission was accomplished. 

"Return safely to Hogwarts." With a last small pat, you gazed at the black owl as it flew off into the distance, back to its owner. 

Returning to your desk, you opened the envelope carefully and unfolded it. You were surprised to see that the content was longer than usual, twice as long. You didn't remember that your previous answer was that interesting to deserve such a detailed reply... Thus, you hurried to read it. 

Dear Y/n, 

I fear I haven't kept my promise.

I think I underestimated the side effects of your Potion, and this past week I've ‘suffered’ the consequences. A few drops was the dose I set myself to respect every night before going to bed, following your advice and the instructions for its use. Alas, after a particularly difficult day, I wanted to experiment with a higher dosage. I don't need to tell you in detail what it did to me, I think you've already guessed…

But I must, at least, keep our initial agreement, so if you don't object I will give you a report on this new experience. For the sake of the profession. 

The usual few drops prevented me from being able to experience in its fullest, the unique taste of the potion's effects. And I must say congratulations, never in my life have I tasted anything so sweet. The description you gave me a few months ago has stayed in my mind since, and I must say that you were right, nothing can describe how it feels. Heaven? Maybe. On that night, I reached heaven.

I was starving, I was out of control (or so I thought). I was almost unable to bear it, and then, it was time to awaken the sleeping madness in me... 

The hardest part is, I can't blame the Potion. It's almost cruel, but as you said, unlike with Amortentia, I had full power over my body, I wasn't intoxicated or bewitched. I succumbed to my impulses on my own. And… It feels good. 

This followed, of my own accord, a kind of addiction. The nights prior to this uneventful ‘accident’ I made a habit of taking these larger doses, for my own pleasure… Thus, I would conclude the entire experience to be more than enjoyable. 

In the future, I will try to find a balance to avoid abusing what is more than good. For the time being, I'm still enjoying myself. 

However, even if your potion is a miracle, it does not take away all the work I need to complete. 

And I must say, a thought came to my mind. In fact, Dumbledore was the one who suggested it to me years ago. And even if I was reluctant to the idea at first... The prospect feels less unpleasant if you are the one taking on this duty. 

Not wishing to interfere with your precious break, would you like to be my occasional assistant? 

You have the right to refuse, I wouldn't blame you. 

If the answer is positive, the first period I would wish to ask for your help would be mid-November, before the first exams. And that's for a few weeks, maybe for two, more or less. 

Naturally, you'll be welcomed at Hogwarts with all the necessities, a private chamber and a paycheck. But I'll give you the details in due time.

In any case, I will respect your decision and will look forward to receiving your answer, as I always do. 

Yours faithfully, 

Severus Snape,

PS: I trust you to keep this information confidential. 

Your eyes frantically scan the contents of the letter, there is a lot to take in. Your cheeks were flushed, your heart was pounding, the first major piece of information was that Severus was using your potion for his own sexual needs. And while you detected some reserve in his wording, he had admitted it without shame in that letter. You would never have thought Severus capable of speaking in such a way (at least, towards you), even if his words were formal, they were nonetheless heavy with meaning and bold.

You couldn't help it, your mind perfectly pictured Severus. At night, alone, under the pleasurable effect of the Potion. In your fantasy, his face was focused, his eyebrows a bit furrowed, some sweat rolling down his forehead because of the heat. A few strands of his hair would fall into his eyes, but his attention was so focused on the intense pleasure he was experiencing that he couldn't care less. Was he the type to moan? Or to remain silent? Or… Maybe the cravings were so powerful that he would bite his lip to keep quiet. 

At first, his hands would temptingly wander down his body, slowly, carefully, intoxicated by the rising pleasure. Touching himself was a pleasant torture, and as he said himself in the letter, he was unable to stop. Knowing how the potion would affect his senses, his skin must feel sensitive, leaving burning trails with every brush of his fingers over every inch of his skin, over all erogenous parts of his body, making him lose his mind. 

The way Severus’ hands would desperately clutched his already erected manhood, dripping precum with impatience, hoping to reach an orgasm, maybe even one or several. Seeking frantically for friction to satiate his craving, his hips bucked, his hand tightening to increase the contact pressure. The sight must be sumptuous. 

You wondered, for a moment, about the thoughts Severus might have to stimulate his mind. Was the Potion working enough to turn him on? Or was he seeking greater satisfaction with some dirty images? This left you with a real question. And you realised that even after all this time, you knew many things about him, but not at all in such an intimate setting. Which made sense, since most of the time you were his student... The first glimpse you had of this point was the letter.   

And, you're the only one who knows his nightly routine. He trusted you, beyond the fact that you were the creator of the Potion who helped him satisfy his lusts. The mere idea to be in the confidence of this secret, made your knickers wet. 

And even though it was already a lot to process, this was not the only exciting news. Severus asked you, himself, to be his assistant. He even suggested it, because the idea of working with you sounded appealing. You. Of all people, he thought about you. 

You didn't question it, it was decided the moment the information reached your brain. You were going to accept. And how could you turn down the offer when the mysterious and reserved Severus Snape admitted on his own, that he was eagerly expecting your letters…

After years of longing to feel that special feeling again, in one letter Severus had given you a lot. 

-

Returning to Hogwarts was a hope you never thought imaginable. However, a week ago you arrived with a suitcase packed, ready to work. The stone corridors, the moving stairs and even the staff had remained the same. The only change was that instead of sitting at your house table for dinner, you were now placed between Flitwick and Snape. And of course, that most of your time was spent in the dark, damp dungeons of the School brewing Potions, or grading papers. 

Unlike what many might think, working alongside Severus was much more manageable than they might have thought. In any case, with you, he trusted your work enough not to question it. In fact, when you arrived, you were quite worried when you saw the dark circles under his eyes, which were more prominent than you used to remember. And when you became his assistant, you understood why. Severus was a perfectionist, and his teaching methods were all tailored to ensure the success of his students. So your tasks were simple, like preparing the exams, the basics for the Potions that were going to be taught, correcting papers, arranging the ingredients... And while you were just assisting him, within a few days he had managed to find more rest. Something that made you feel better.

Apart from that, the working conditions were quiet and calm. Severus was conversing with you during the simplest of tasks, he didn't seem as tight as usual (in private, at least), what you guessed were the effects of your Potion. At times, it was simply work performed in a comfortable silence. But between you, there was no longer any sign of discomfort or coldness. It was as if it had never happened, actually. 

Well, until today. 

"I wonder..." Severus began his sentence thoughtfully, his eyes focused on the cauldron in front of him, his hands busy chopping up ingredients, "How I used to find time to work and talk to you, back then."

You had a similar task, but unlike him you looked up in surprise. Severus rarely mentioned the past between you, or even the letters you had exchanged the past month. "I don't know either... That's why you stopped in my seventh grade, right?"

You didn't particularly want to mention the subject that had become nearly forbidden with time, namely your cold war. But you felt that under the current circumstances, you were old and mature enough to take it on yourself. Even though you might never get any solid answers about his past behaviour. 

“Y/n, we both know that’s not the truth.” 

Your eyes were still fixed on him, and you didn't know if Severus was too focused on his Potion to realise the implication of his words, or if he really wanted to discuss the issue once and for all. But you weren't going to miss your chance, trying to summon all your courage. "Oh- Really? Those are the excuses you gave me, would you like to tell me the truth then?" You answered casually, trying to play it cool despite your racing heart. Years of seeking the answer, it was as if what haunted you most was finally going to be removed. 

However, the answer did not come as easily as the conversation had started, Severus stopped in his tracks and raised his head to you. His expression was hesitant, or perplexed, you didn't really know. "It was best for us to stop there, that's the real reason." He replies vaguely, his eyes fixed on your face where you stand across the Potion station. 

You frowned, you were an adult now, you could handle and accept the truth. Severus, on the other hand, was being vague, as if putting a finger on what had happened was forbidden. "Are you implying that in our professional discussions, we were going down the wrong path?" You didn't want to tempt him, but getting the truth out of Severus' mouth was more complicated than you expected. 

"Our discussions were nothing professional." He sounded a bit irritated with himself, indeed, the subject was sensitive on both sides. He put a lid on his Potion and dried his hands with a cloth, "We're done for the day, you can leave me." He waved you off, putting an end to the conversation. 

But you stayed in your place, it was as if your feet were frozen to the ground, you couldn't leave. "You are the one who started the conversation. Don't be angry with me." Your voice was quite composed, you weren't afraid to face him. And just like at the event, he seemed stunned by your tone of voice. 

You put the tools down and placed a lid on the Potion in the same way he had just done. "You cannot cut off the discussion and asked me to leave, Severus. You don't know how I've suffered my entire last year because of this, because of you. You can at least look me in the eye and give me a proper answer.” You sighed, as he tried to keep his eyes from looking at you. Perhaps because of guilt. 

"Severus, we can sort this out, and go back to the way things were. But I need an answer, to move on. To be free of this guilt. Did I do something wrong? Was I bothering you so much? Tell me…" You hated how your voice was almost begging. But with every word you said, you could feel it, it was like he was re-building that distance between you. You didn't want to lose him, not that quickly. 

"Severus... Please." You finally decided to move, taking a step towards him, the atmosphere in the classroom had totally changed. But even if the tension was heavy, you weren't going to abandon him, not this time. He did not move as you approached him, however, his face was tense. You hadn't seen him this cold in a while. 

"I can't answer you. Things wouldn't be the same after that.” His voice was harsh, but not offensive. He sounded frustrated with himself, “But… If you want an answer, I must admit I'm not sufficiently secure to reveal my past intentions." 

His words were odd, leaving you confused. The enigma that was Severus Snape was impossible to understand no matter how much time you were spending by his side. Can he give me an answer or not?

Several times your mouth opened in an attempt to answer, but nothing came to your mind. The problem seemed to be stuck. It left you upset. "I... I want an answer." Your words were both hesitant and confident, the statement was, frankly, a bit silly. 

This seemed to amuse Severus, who laughed silently in mockery, warming the atmosphere. “Why are you so…” He paused for a moment as if hesitating, then at last he gave in, "Endearing?” 

His words slammed into your heart, leaving you baffled. But you didn't have time to answer, Severus resumed speaking just as soon, "But, if I can manage to calm myself, maybe I'll be able to talk to you. Does that please you, Y/n?"

You hesitated, understanding what Severus was implying behind those words, 'relaxing' meant taking a few drops of Sweet Juice. And as much as you wanted to keep a respectful image of Severus, the last words written  in his letter about its use stayed in the back of your mind. But, how can I refuse?

"Fine.” You agreed, nodding slowly.

Severus seemed somewhat reassured by your agreement, the walls he was starting to build around himself to push you away, were falling down again. It was his turn to approach you, offering his arm. A habit he'd adopted with every walk you shared at Hogwarts. You took his arm, the gesture had become natural, Severus added, "Follow me."

With that, you walked after him. Severus led you, in the utmost silence. Your heart was pounding, you didn't know exactly what to expect. The path he was taking, staying in the dungeons of the school, made you realise that he was inviting you into his personal quarters, which did not help your state of mind. Every step you made, was a step towards the possible truth. 

Your recent exchange had been unclear, Severus was just as confused by his attitude as you were, you could tell with the look on his face. Torture between two separate decisions: to hate you back or accept what was happening between you two. 

Still in silence, Severus finally arrived, unlocked the door to his quarters and let you in first. It was the first time you had entered, and the surroundings seemed oddly familiar. Everything reflected Severus, with its dark tones and simple, yet elegant furnishings. Your eyes rest on the many books, all meticulously arranged, and then, a little farther away, on the bed. It was impossible to miss the three vials filled with the purple liquid that you had conceived yourself, one of them was nearly empty. The sight of Sweet Juice beside his bed only made your heart flutter, as if it was confirmation that everything he had described to you was, indeed, true.  

"Well, sit on the sofa. I'm coming up with what's needed." Severus breaks the silence as he removes his cloak, stopping your dirty thoughts dead in their tracks.

"Yes, of course." You nodded, quite flustered, and you did what you were asked as you sat down on the couch, next to the fireplace and the bookcases. Your eyes followed Severus' actions as he made his way to his bed, lighting the fireplace with his wand as he passed. 

He came back with a new bottle of Sweet Juice in his hands, and sat without discomfort at your side. "Do you use it daily as well?" He asked you, an undeniable curiosity in his voice. 

"Um... No, I just tested it on myself a while ago before I submitted the notice. I have no use for it." You looked at him blankly, you didn't know what Severus was trying to find out with his question, "So, it was only for professional purposes." You added rather quickly, in case he wondered if you too were finding sexual satisfaction through its use. 

"Well, this will be the occasion to taste it again then." His hands opened the bottle carefully, and with some skill showing how familiar he was with its use. 

You looked at him, confused by his words, "I don't intend to take it, you said you were the one who needed it to speak honestly." 

"I think it's wiser for you to take it, to learn the truth. I don't want you to get mad at me." He replied with his calm voice, "Don't you trust me?" He raised an eyebrow with his usual expertise in the motion. 

Of course you trusted him, the question didn't have to be asked. And right now, with all the tension in your body from the pressure of the whole situation, you had to agree. He was right, it was wiser if the both of you were in the same state to discuss. "Fine, but only a few drops..."

Severus nodded, "A few drops will be more than enough."

You reached for the vial, but Severus placed his hand on your chin before you could get your hands on it, and directed your face in his direction. “Open your mouth, please Y/n.” 

His eyes were fixed on you, you felt like melting under his gaze, so intense was it. You couldn't ignore the intimate intensity of the situation, your cheeks were starting to burn. The scenario was far more pleasant than anything you could have imagined in your dirtiest dreams. 

Without even adding anything, you parted your lips for him. Severus seemed satisfied with your willingness, and put the eyedropper to let a few drops fall from it. A promise he kept. And even though it was only a few drops, the taste burned in your throat, taking effect as soon as it was swallowed. It was addictive, sweet… Divine. A tickling sensation settled in your body, you felt perfectly fine, as if your body had never felt any tension. 

Severus watched your every reaction, his hand still on your chin, you felt like your skin was burning under his fingers, "Well. You seem to be reacting well."

He withdrew his hand and this gesture left you with a feeling of need. Your eyes never left him for a second as you watched him perform the same operation with himself. His previously tense face, softened in an instant. To have Severus so effortlessly relaxed was quite an exclusive sight. He trusted you enough to be so vulnerable without shame, in front of you. It made you smile.

"Y/n, I've been intending to talk to you about this for a while, it weighs on me just as much. I'm sorry for the way I acted," Severus began quietly. 

Hearing him apologise was strange, he was such a proud man. It made you happy, because while he was under the effect of the potion, he was still aware of what he was doing or saying. He was not controlled by the Potion, in front of you there was a sincere and apologetic Severus. One of the many facets you were starting to find out about this very mysterious man. 

"I apologise as well, I wasn't always straightforward." You matched his gentle tone, 

Severus shook his head, "You were not the problem, I handled the situation very poorly. It's all my fault, I hurt you." He put his hand over his face, ashamed, "When, in fact, that's all I wanted to avoid... It haunted me, until I saw you again a few months ago. I wanted redemption, to make sure you were fine without me... But, I’m selfish as I am taking a role in your life again,” He sighed hopelessly, “There's still this guilt in me.”

Hearing Severus speak with such regret, made your heart grow fonder for the man, you couldn't fault him. He had suffered the same pain from his choices, he acted in order not to lose his teaching position, in order to not deprive you of a possible 'happy' life. And even if the Potion worked miracles, guilt and pain couldn't be erased. You wanted to reassure him, to remove this pain from him, to leave it in the past. "Severus, I only wish to understand what I did wrong..." You whispered, your eyes focused on the buttons that fastened his cutaway coat.

The more minutes passed, the more the Potion worked through your body. The sensation was odd, like a kind of ache, but it was unmistakably delightful. This only served to reinforce your self-consciousness about the situation, your body tickled everywhere, straining, trembling, longing to be close to him. 

"You have done nothing wrong... As the days went by, my regard for you changed. Your radiant smile, the way your eyes brighten at my every word, the way your perfume intoxicates me when it stays in the classroom, your delicate hands working with agility... All of this, I should never have noticed, and yet, I couldn't help but feel captivated. Charmed because of what you were, and still are, in fact." 

He slowly pulled his hand away from his face. But, you didn't want to leave him in his demise, so you laid your hand on his as he lowered it, encouraging him to continue. "I wasn't blind, I knew the feeling you held for me. I believed it was for the benefit of the both of us. But after rejecting you, I was terribly missing you. Inside me, it built up a terrible guilt…” He paused for a moment before concluding, “And without realising it, I was feeling the same way about you."

Severus gently takes your hand in his, as if you were a delicate flower, or would disappear at any moment. His gaze is now focussed on both your joined hands, "Since, I haven't stopped thinking about you, night and day. Seeing you again... Was a breath of hope, I thought impossible. And even though you sounded different, like you were angry with me, I couldn't help but appreciate you. I soon realised that despite all my efforts, pushing you away a second time was beyond me... Beyond my strength."

He intertwined his fingers with yours, "You can hate me, yell at me. I hurt you and yet, selfishly you're here with me, instead of enjoying what life has to give you. I’m older, grim, and stern. I don't deserve you."

As he confessed, what you were focused on, was the heavy pounding of your heart ringing in your ears. The intensity of his emotions was heartbreaking, as you listened to him. 

Your body's reaction to his was overwhelming, everything seemed like a raging fire that neither of you wanted to quench. The sensation of his own skin against yours only made it burn harder, leaving you with an insatiable urge of need and want. Your body knew what it wanted, the heat started to build up in the lower part of your stomach.

"I- Severus… I'm sorry that I was angry with you, when you were trying to do the right thing. I had no idea how you might be feeling on your own. But today, everything has changed, I’m not your student anymore.” You spoke with all the determination you could muster to prove him wrong, “And I don't care what life has to offer, if you are older. I know what I want. And it’s you.” 

“It's only been a few weeks since I've been back with you, and I've never felt so happy. I feel alive.” Your cheeks flushed hot at your blunt words, “And to be honest, the club, the award, Sweet Juice, I did it all, to get your attention. I wanted to be special to you again."

"Come," Severus uttered in a deep, rumbling voice. His hand, the one that was already holding you, pulled you towards him, and his other hand guided your hips as he gently settled you on his lap, straddling him. The way your body easily accepted his request, was a reflection of how much you wanted to be with him, to be close to him. 

"I wanted to move on, to forget you, but it was impossible. But nowadays, as I am closer to you..." Your eyes fell on his face, Severus seemed to be listening to you with such intensity, that coupled with this sudden intimacy caused you to speak in a shaky breath, "I burn and my body is feeling new things, and the intensity is only growing, nearly out of control. I can't think anymore, you're always on my mind…- I just want to be close to you, like I've always hoped." Your voice died down near the end, admitting your deepest thoughts. You were nervous, the aching sensation started to get on your nerves, overflowing with desire for the man in front of you.

His hands gripped your clothes, as if to remind you that he was indeed there, by your side. You were taken aback by the violent wave of emotions that flashed through his eyes. Severus had said nothing after your own confession, but there was no need for him to speak in order for you to understand. His eyes were speaking for him. Need, lust, desperation, want, longing- And most strikingly, love. His hands clasped your face, leaving you no choice but to lock your eyes with his. You couldn't escape the impact of his emotions, of the intense waves crashing over you nearly suffocating you. And the truth is, you had no desire to avoid him. 

It was as if time had stopped, his beautiful face, his lovely hands, the wildness in his eyes, and the way he made you feel was beyond description. 

"I love you," He exhaled as his thumb stroked your cheek. It felt like a weight was being lifted from his chest, 

Your fingers found his shoulders, pressing into the soft fabric of his coat, “I love you as well,” You answered, the same weight disappearing from your heart. 

The affirmation of your feelings towards him seemed to ignite something new in Severus. His thumb went down to your lips, running it over them, "You know, I thought about you as my assistant not only because you're the smartest, most diligent and serious person I know to handle the task perfectly," He spoke in a low grumble that made your whole body quiver, "But also because every night as I took a stronger dose of that delicious elixir you conceived, I always find myself thinking about you. I found satisfaction only when I thought of you.” 

He sighs, "I must admit that if you're here, it's also because I couldn't bear to keep all this to myself, I had to confess. I wanted to see you again, terribly."

“I’m here Severus, I’m here for you and only you.” You replied hurriedly in order to reassure him.

He took a deep breath, your words seemed to have reached his heart, "Maybe it's a bit premature, but I should ask you."

It sent a ripple of delight through your entire body, increasing the desperation you had to be against him, “What do you want to ask me, Severus?”

Your question, perhaps somewhat naive given the situation, brought a smile to his lips, “Would you like to make love with me?” The question was phrased extremely graciously, contrasting dramatically with the ferocity of his eyes. 

Your body shivered under his powerful stare. Your reply was obvious, and yet in the warmth of his body, in the puddle of intensity that Severus was bathing you in, you were at a loss for words. He looked at you like a hunter ready to chase down his prey, your consent was all he needed for him to pounce on you. It should have worried you, but behind his raging stare were years of self-restraint and pain. You felt more than special, being loved by such a cold and distant man made you feel like you were the only one in this wide world, the one and only for him. 

You couldn't make him wait any longer, it was torture for him as much as it was for you. So you nodded, silently at first, then you found the courage to finally voice your need, "Yes, Severus, I do."

He smiled again, it was a delightful sight to see Severus smiling, and you took a moment to observe him as if to commit the image to memory. It was so infrequent, that you were pleased to know that you were the only one to be blessed by it. He was perfect, you could do nothing but kiss him. Passionately, freely, desperately. There was nothing anymore to stop you from doing it. You tasted him, setting all your senses on fire. You licked the inside of his mouth, as his tongue linked with yours in an intoxicating dance that only the both of you seemed to know. The scent and taste of him captured all your senses, and you couldn't stop humming with delight as it resonated through your chest from the pleasure of kissing him. 

In that first kiss, you feel it all. 

Both of his hands clasped your face tightly to keep you close to him as your hands trailed through his long hair, down to his neck. The warmth that radiated from him made your flesh flush, your heart pounding so hard in your chest that even Severus should be able to feel it. He tasted like heaven. 

He skillfully guides you, allowing you to get lost in his adoration. One hand gently grasped your throat, while his other hand travelled from your cheek over your neck, down to your waist where his arm snaked around to press your body against his in a secure embrace. 

Severus didn't break the kiss, as he stood up, carrying you in his arms. Your eyes were closed, allowing you to get completely absorbed in the feverish kiss, but you knew he was heading for his bed. The next moment, your body found its place against the soft fabric of his sheets, enveloping you once again in his wonderful manly scent. Wrecking you, in the most pleasing ways possible. 

You moaned into his mouth as your fingers tugged his hair a bit tighter, Severus growled at your action, searing your whole being from you body to your soul. You were desperate for more, to see him, to touch him, to feel him. Your clothes were simply a suffocating barrier that separated you from Severus. Your irritation didn't seem to escape Severus as he broke off the feverish kiss you two were sharing. 

You finally opened your eyes, to be greeted by a dishevelled and flushed Severus. You were both out of breath, panting. However, he was quick to lay another kiss on the exposed skin of your throat. Sweetly, lovingly, small kisses from the tip of his lips teasing you, all dripping with desire.

"Love, you're perfect," He hummed against your neck as he gently nuzzled his nose against it to inhale your fragrance. You were like in heaven, your blood was running through your veins, your stomach transformed into butterflies out of worship for him. 

His hands ran along your body, before undoing the button on your skirt. Your thighs were released quickly from the constraint that your clothes provided you as he dropped the first piece of fabric on the floor. Your hands hesitantly passed over his upper body, your fingers delicately unfasten the buttons of his coat. Once done, your hands grabbed the lapels of his coat to let it fall over his shoulders, quickly meeting your skirt on the floor. 

Severus certainly was consumed by an insatiable urge, never getting enough of you. His lips never leave you, trailing against your jaw, nibbling your earlobe. His warm breath left your sensitive skin tingling with delight. Your hands were slightly trembling as you began to reach for his shirt, while his hands reached for the rest of your clothes with utmost care. 

The clothes that had been a painful barrier, began to strip from your bodies, slowly, teasingly. Falling one by one on the floor. Severus leaned on his arm as he took a few steps back, your breath caught with worry and missing his warmth. His eyes roamed over your body, in an intimidating powerful manner. You had never felt so vulnerable and exposed, only covered by your underwear, his intense gaze left a heavy feeling on everything you could offer him. 

However, you didn't have time to think for long when his lips captured yours. “Perfect,” He whispered as his eyes met yours. With burning cheeks, you averted your eyes. You could not hold his gaze, so much the intensity of his emotions caught your heart. His pupils were dilated, too wild, too fiery. 

Your reaction left Severus laughing in a deep breath, "You really are more lovely than anything I could have imagined. My mind didn’t do you justice, love.” The gentle title he gave you made your heart beat faster, and as your hands were pressed against his chest you sensed the intense pounding of his as well. Both your hearts were beating in perfect tune. 

Your hands began to undo the upper part of his shirt, releasing his neck from his stiff attire. You were still shaking, but proceeded nonetheless. There was only a layer left before you could see him as vulnerable. Severus waited, letting you take all the time you needed to finish. And the next thing you knew, you were pulling his shirt off his shoulders in the same way you'd done before. 

You marvelled at the sight in front of you, your breath caught in your throat at the sheer beauty of Severus, his broad shoulders, his pale pearly skin, his strong arms were now at your total disposal. You gave yourself a moment to appreciate the one you've craved for, over the years.

"Perfect," You whispered with the same adoration he had for you, your fingers spread over his bare skin, temptingly. You were amazed at the softness of his body despite his strength, he, who held himself so rigidly in his daily life. 

"Not as much as you, love," Severus left a warm kiss on your cleavage and his hands found the clasp of your bra as your hands found down his trousers. He removed the rest of his clothes at the same time as you.

Your skin was flushed, your breaths quick and uneven with anticipation. It's a good thing you had taken a few drops of Sweet Juice, otherwise you would have been a nervous wreck. This allowed you to handle the whole experience with confidence, coupled with your trust in Severus, it was pure bliss. And this must have been the case for Severus, because behind his expert strokes, he seemed a bit unsure with himself. 

Your skin burned under his every touch, letting the fire spread over your skin down to your trembling, hot, insides. You were wet, swollen and soft. Severus sat on his knees, between your legs. The action left your body screaming with desperation, arching with anticipation for more, for him. Until now, you had not dared to lower your eyes to the level of his girth, but now it was time to get acquainted with what was about to enter you. Your breath was taken away at the sight of his long, veiny and erect manhood. That’s going inside of me?

"Love, I'll be gentle with you," Severus sensed your apprehension immediately, his hands gently resting on your knees to spread your legs leaving your body on high alert. He leaned forward, and placed a first kiss on your jaw, then another one on your breast, before his mouth wrapped around your already hard nipples to sweetly suck on it. 

You didn't know if you'd taken a sufficiently large dose of the Potion for it to play on your sexual sensibilities, but you gasped. The feeling of his soft lips over your most forbidden body parts was exhilarating, your insides tensed. Your breasts were sensitive, responsive to every lick he gave. You were blown away by the way your body fit to him, catching his slightest touch. And as if he wasn't satisfied enough with himself, he moved his hand up from your hip, running teasingly along your skin to find your nipple, toying with it, pinching it. You couldn't help but moan, the sensation strains you again, leaving you longing for more. Your mind failed to follow, a wave of pleasure overtaking your whole body. Everything felt heightened, the sound of Severus' sharp breath, his tongue, his touch, his scent. Even the cotton of his sheets was seemingly intense. 

Severus let out a long, deep growl from the back of his throat, and it made your whole body shudder. Your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, ready to welcome him. He understood the sign, but continued to whisper his words of adoration, of love for you. How he had dreamed of this for years, that he didn't want to be apart from you anymore. His words that met the hollow of your ear, made you feel in a whirlwind of emotions, cherished and safe. You held on to him, your arms reaching around his shoulders. 

He wanted to slowly devour you, until your rational thoughts were consumed by pleasure.  

“Sev,” You breathed out a long, deep moan as his finger slid inside you. You were soaking wet at this point, drenched for him. His finger stroked your insides, his thumb brushed against your sensitive bundle of nerves while his lips lingered on your throat, placing numerous small kisses. 

“You are perfect,” He hummed out, right by your ear, “Perfect for me,” His nose dragged along your skin, in the hope of finding a new spot to kiss. He pressed another finger into you. Your legs tightened while your insides softened further. The stretching of his fingers was astounding. “You are the only one for me, I love you,” His words shattered everything, all the common sense you had in you. You wanted him to ruin you with his love. In a manner as violent as the emotions you had for each other, giving him everything, everything you ever had. 

Removing his fingers, your eyes fell on his hand as it darted back and forth between his legs. You gasped as his delicate hand folded around the girth of his manhood. "Love, I'm here. It's going to be fine. Tell me if you don't feel well, I'll stop," he hummed softly as he laid back against you, pressing his body over yours. You nodded, and his lips found yours anew. 

You felt his body lowering, and the next instant, he was sinking inside you. You hissed from the pleasure that suddenly caught hold of you. There was no discomfort, no pain, your body adapted, moulded itself to him. Your body was being taken by Severus, and everything at that moment, finally being one with him, felt right. 

“Look at me,” He ordered you gently, holding himself up with one arm, ready to move. When your eyes met his, you were immersed in the depth of his love. You felt calm, in heaven, as you were shaped to accommodate him. He was the only one in this world, especially when he was looking at you with such worship. 

“Good,” He smiled in satisfaction when you complied. Your eyes were hypnotised by all the love he bore you. He began to draw out, slowly. And as with your skin, your insides were just as sensitive causing electricity to run through your body, sending a shiver down your spine. His gaze intensified as he began to move a bit faster, his movements always precise and well controlled, making it more intense. 

Catching his breath, Severus kept praising you, “You, are, magnifi-cent,” He growled in a low tone, between thrust as you moaned out his name in a barely comprehensible manner. You find satisfaction in being filled and stroked, to be loved in such a carnal manner, it was intense, overwhelmingly intense. He was everywhere, he was everything to you. 

“Sev-, Severus, I love you!” Your voice was slurred, your mind was unable to form a coherent thought, and yet you felt the urgent need to confess your love all over again. At your words, he quickened his pace and buried himself inside you, over and over.

You were consumed by him, by his love, by your love for him. You were his, and he was yours. Entirely, irrevocably, ineluctably. There was no other way. Severus was breaking everything you owned, and it felt right. With every push, with every pull, with his loving hands, with his loving words, with his hungry breath, he was breaking you.

“Please,” You pleaded for him, a moan escaping through your sore lips. His movements became powerful, irregular, hasty. As if to satisfy you as much as possible, even if he was exceeding all your wishes, pushing your mind to the edge of depravity with each of his thrusts. 

“Love,” He growled in a feverish manner, as if he had been entrusted with the most valuable mission possible, to please you. He shoved in so deeply that your eyes rolled back and watered from the sensation of being nothing but completely filled. You back arched in pleasure, welcoming the emotion in its fullest. 

“Awh-” You gasped as he started to pace harder, faster. Your legs were quivering from the pleasure, your lungs burned from your moans. He held onto you tighter, in order to be able to dig into you with more vigour. Over and over. It was relentless. His need for you became beyond desperate and engulfed him into the same depravity. 

“I love-, you,” He moaned darkly under his gruff breath, “I can’t-” He growled this time, in a low rumbling. His movements became irregular, erratic. 

You kissed his neck, inhaling his sweaty scent and the taste of his skin stirred in your mouth. “Me too-” You whispered, in a rather dark tone, meeting his love and distress at the same time. 

“Y/n-!” He growled, and after a split second, you felt him growing within you, as his whole body tightened, hardened. His cock shifted faster inside you, pounding against your inner walls. He buries his face in the crook of your neck and moans his release before his movements come to a slow halt. 

Ripples of heat mingled with the throbbing of muscles and the warmth of the skin inside you. You held him close and marvelled at the sensation of your orgasm, of being filled and being enough for him to reach such a fierce release. To be enough for him to love you, to be enough for him to be so intimate with you. 

You caught your breath, you were in a state of pure bliss. The last waves of pleasure take over your body, making the pleasure last longer. Severus withdrew from you, leaving you with a longing that he satisfied by taking you in his arms enjoying your post-orgasm state.

He placed a kiss on your sweaty forehead as he affectionately snuggled you pressing your body against his. After the intense encounter you'd just experienced he still longed to feel your burning skin against his. “I love you,” He said it again, as if he needed to prove it to you, but you knew by now that his affection towards you was wrenching. 

"I love you more," you lay your head against his chest, letting the sound of his heart lull you to sleep as it only started to calm. His soft laughter vibrated through his rib cage, 

"I doubt it, love, but this is not the time to talk about it. Tomorrow is another day, a day when I can finally enjoy you without any rules or barriers," Severus sounded enthusiastic, he pulled the blanket over both of your naked bodies and took his wand to stop all sources of fire from making any light. 

His uncharacteristic lively tone brings a peaceful smile to your lips, you are now the one that makes Severus eager to wake up in the morning, to carry on with his life. He was your source of happiness, and you were his. 

After years of trying to understand everything between the two of you, you were now in his arms. 

Peaceful. 

Loved.