#although their separation was more traumatic (for them)

[outofangband]

Beleriand is wide and houseless for exiles

AKA that one Morwen and generational trauma meta I revise a couple times a year

updated post with more meta on the House of Bëor in general and has been updated to read like a real post and not just rambling!

My general tag for Bëorian cultural trauma is houseless for exiles  where I have a lot more like this

So Morwen is obviously one of my very favorite characters in Tolkien’s world, in general  and she is in my opinion one of the most interesting figures in The Children of Húrin, though as she is separated from Túrin for so long there are long periods of her life we have only summaries on. I find these fascinating to speculate on and read/write about

I wrote this post while very tired so I hope this makes sense and is ok, I just wanted to throw out some thoughts and I wanted to write more about the trauma her people went through during Dagor Bragollach

The Battle of the Sudden Flame and the aftermath is such an important part of Morwen’s life that likely plays a significant part in shaping her character though it happens before the events of the book and is mentioned only briefly, much information needing to be found through inference and connecting details

The House of Bëor lived in Ladros in Eastern Dorthonion where Aegnor and Angrod, sons of Finarfin, lived and lead a defense of the Watchful Peace, maintaining a friendship with their Edain allies. Ladros was a cool land of pine forests and steep, craggily slopes that lay South of the great green fields of Ard-Galen and then of Angband and the regions of Morgoth.

On a cold winter night in the year 455 of the First Age, rivers of flames, many choked in poisonous fumes, were sent down from the Thangorodrim. These utterly devastated Ard-Galen turning it from the fertile, green lands to a desert made uninhabitable by the lingering clouds of toxic air. Next came a legion of balrogs with Glaurung leading them and a massive army of orcs that quickly invaded Dorthonion, killing countless elves and humans including Aegnor and Angrod, taking a large number captive and occupying and/or displacing the rest of the Bëorians. Barahir, the father of Beren led a group of outlaws including the fathers of Morwen and Rían. Their group was killed in a massacre by the lake Tarn Aeulin several years later after

(It’s likely Morwen knew nothing of this until she came to Doriath, if even then)

During the chaos of the invasion of Ladros, Emeldir, the mother of Beren fought to protect the children of the Bëorians, many if not most of whom had been orphaned. She managed to lead a group of refugees Southwest to Brethil where the Halidan took them in. Later, though there is not much said in the text about this, a small group of the surviving Bëorians would come to Dor-Lómin in Hithlum where the Hadorians lived. (Note: I have two posts speculating on their route, here and here)

Morwen was elven or twelve when Dagor Bragollach broke out, depending on when in the year her birthday is*. She was likely orphaned during the invasion though we know only that she was separated from her father who was later killed. She was among the Bëorian refugees who would come to Hithlum though her age at the time is unknown. There is so much that is unknown about her life before the events of the Narn.

I also spoke about this on a few different posts, but I’ve oft wondered if Morwen’s time in Brethil as a child was not a good one. Our glimpse into how some of the Haladin treat those who are mentally ill, neurodivergent or traumatized in The Wanderings of Húrin is a very bleak one and although this is certainly not representative of all the people of Brethil, this combined with parts of Morwen’s conversation with Húrin prior to the Nírnaeth leads me to believe she does not look at her time there with good feelings

Both the text of the Narn and Morwen herself describe her as an exile; one who has not only been forced to leave their home but who is forbidden from returning.

The word diaspora obviously comes to mind as well.

There is a bitter shame that bubbles beneath her cloak of pride, an unearned shame but one that has left its mark on her nonetheless (another thing I've mde way too many posts on tbh; her grief and pride are completley inextricable from each other, almost every line in the Narn mentioning her pride or her more severe qualities comes with the addendum that as much as it is directed at others, it is also directed at herself; "for Morwen was as stern with others as with herself", "she did not seek to comfort him any more than herself, etc")

That Morwen is a refugee in Dor-lómin is an important aspect of her character as is her likely trauma from Dagor Bragollach, how flames and armies drove her and her people from their home, killed so many of them, destroying their families and way of life.

It’s not difficult to speculate on the extent of violence that she witnessed and the horrific trauma she was barely old enough to understand. Eleven or twelve is such an age, just starting to understand your own identity and place in your family and community and culture and then to have that so brutally torn apart…

(I personally headcanon that she was injured in the Bragollach and had burn scars but that’s a different post)

I think her pride is very much tied to the fact that she is one of the only remaining members of the House of Bëor, a people who Morwen herself considers all but gone as she says to her husband in the first chapter.

I’m thinking about how this impacts her choice to remain in Dor-lómin after Nirnaeth, thinking that perhaps this time nothing short of another fiery inferno will drive her from her home. How she will not flee again (even as Rían, another of the few survivors, runs again and runs until she cannot get up).

And what’s on her mind when she speaks with Húrin before he leaves for Nirnaeth, how she believes her House to be fallen and fears Húrin’s following suit. The destruction of Hithlum would mean another home taken from her.

I’m also wondering about her significantly less optimistic view of the elves. While Húrin is heartened by the knowledge that the lords of the Noldor have known Valinor and the Valar themselves, Morwen thinks quietly of the exile of the Noldor from Valinor. Which also makes her being labeled elffriend (derogatory) and accused of power akin to theirs

“Húrin Thalion, this I judge truer to say: that you look high, but I fear to fall low.”

That Morwen lives in her own home under occupation for so long adds yet another painful irony to that quote.

“Beleriand is wide and houseless for exiles” is also just one of my very favorite spoken lines by Morwen. I just always feel so strongly that Morwen is not just talking about her hypothetical future there but also her here and now. Even in the safety of her own home and room (I always pictured that conversation as in their bedroom?) she is acutely aware that she will never return to where she grew up, that the place of her and her people in the world has been irrevocably changed. She is contemplating this ordeal being repeated and likely becoming more convinced that it will be. The sheer exhaustion alone of having to reckon with that…

I don’t think the parallels between Morwen and Túrin with regard to fleeing and being hunted or trapped and the ways these and the fear of them shape their lives are discussed enough

A lot of Túrin’s story is about exile. He is forced to flee his home and spends most of the story away from it, deprived of news of his loved ones and people for years at a time. When he does return it is temporary and he finds it unrecognizable.

Even his memories of home, of any home he makes, are clouded.

But his home is not Morwen’s, at least not in the same way. What he loses in Dor-lómin, Morwen has lost more than a decade before the events of the Narn.

Morwen escapes Glaurung twice and ends up in Brethil both times afterwards. Like not to put too fine a point on it but she has always been running and trying to escape the horrors of the past and also she lives in fear, a very real fear, of being forced out, forced to run, or else trapped and imprisoned. When she fears Thingol means to keep her in Doriath against her will, she tells him this fear is part of what made her delay going and I don’t think she is exaggerating in the slightest.

I am just never not obsessed with the themes of diaspora, exile, and persecution in The Children of Húrin.

Anyways I hope this is coherent and all. Hopefully I’ll say something more meaningful on this later. I love Morwen very much.

*as the year of her birth is from The Shaping of Middle Earth it is not considered strictly canon however it does match up with other timelines and events.

[hcnnibal]

Since it’s on the brain, was the 1992 Event like a single moment, or was it more protracted over days/weeks/months?

kind of… both…

[fellator]

watched tomorrowland too and like. objectively not a very good movie but made much much worse by how iffy the political message is. by the end it's very 💗 you have to be a dreamer and never give up 💗 but in the middle of the movie they say so many things

[trainer-from-unova]

secret

Ⓢ english ao3 Ⓢ spanish ao3 Ⓢ masterlist Ⓢ

ship: the void x f!reader (x bob reynolds)

summary: where you're dating the void, and not even bob knows it. it was easy to hide the secret from him, it was the others who were the problem.

au: bob and the void are different personalities / did

c/w: post-canon, hurt/comfort (but not for poor bob), void bullying bob

a/n: english isn't my first language and a kudo on ao3 will be appreciated even if you read it here <3

word count: 2281

It had been a good few months for Bob. Although he didn't dare use his powers again, he was now living free with the New Avengers in their tower. He had gained a group of friends, a family who loved him and really cared about him. What he didn't know was that he had also gained a girlfriend, kinda. And to his surprise, she was the one he shared the least alone time with, or so he thought.

It was easy to hide the secret from Bob, it was the others who were the problem. Luckily there were few of them in the team, but they still seemed too many. It didn't help that almost all of them were trained as spies and that one in particular could turn invisible, though at least Void had the ability to see her even if she turned invisible to the others.

They saw each other at night, when everyone was asleep and when Bob was supposed to be asleep, so Bob would have no gaps in his memory and wouldn't suspect anything. But it's hard not to make noise when you meet your partner in your room at night... Although the walls, doors and windows of the attic were soundproofed, they always tried to make as little noise as possible, as some of the team members had enhanced abilities.

And even if there was plenty of room, sometimes it was inevitable that they would bump into someone.

It was three o'clock in the morning when, kissing goodbye in front of Bob's bedroom door, they accidentally bumped into Bucky, probably awake due to insomnia or just awakened by a nightmare with traumatic memories. The couple separated quickly, and luckily the darkness of the place disguised well the facial expression of Void, so different and yet so similar to Bob's.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" said the soldier in a whisper.

"Don't worry about it," she said in the same tone, looking up at him as she took her boyfriend's hand, squeezing it tightly. And he understood perfectly what she was trying to communicate: "Play along with me and pretend". "Please don't say anything to the others, we want it to be secret," and in that sense she wasn't lying. "You haven't seen us and we haven't seen you, okay? This didn't happen."

Though it was dark they noticed him nod as he resumed his silent course, and Void merely said a silent goodbye to her as well, leaning over her slightly to kiss the top of her head as he grabbed the doorknob with one hand to slowly open the door and lock himself inside the room.

If only Bucky had been the only one who had discovered them unwittingly... But as time went on they all discovered them, and they followed the same strategy they had with this one.

Also, as time went on, Bob began to feel something for her. It was more than companionship and friendship, and perhaps it didn't make sense because he didn't have as close a relationship with her as he did with Yelena, but he could tell he had a special chemistry with her. He unknowingly caught the love that Void had for her.

And he might not remember the experiences of Void, but the muscle memory remained. He couldn't help but turn his neck in the direction ______ was facing, fix his eyes on her, sharpen his hearing at the sound of her voice, and even feel the urge to take her hand and kiss her. Clearly he didn't do that, because she wasn't his. He knew that. A voice inside him reminded him of it when he stared at her too long. "She's not yours." But he wanted to make her his, and he knew he needed female advice for that.

"Can we talk?" Bob asked quietly, shyly entering his best girl friend's bedroom after he knocked on the door with a few taps and she told him from inside that he could come in. "I need advice on a matter..." he said as he closed the door behind him.

"Sure," she replied as she got up from the bed she was lying on, sitting cross-legged and locking her mobile phone to put it away. "What is it?" she asked as she watched him approach her bed. "Is something wrong?" she asked as he sat on the edge of the bed.

"No no," he said quickly, reassuring her and dispelling any doubts about his mental health. "You see..." he sighed, staring off into nothingness, mentally thinking about what he was going to say and how he was going to say it, "I like ______," he said shyly, "and, I don't know," he shrugged, "I was wondering if you could give me some advice on... I don't know- Winning her over and maybe asking her out," she looked at him completely quizzical, frowning.

"Weren't you already dating her?"

"What?" he asked now, in the same tone and with the same facial expression. "No."

"Oh so you're just having an affair...?" she asked, a little less confused.

"No, not even that," he said still just as confused, and the same level of confusion returned in her.

"I saw you together one night," she remembered, "kissing in the middle of the hallway."

"Are you sure it was me?"

"Well, yes — it was dark, but..."

And she stopped dead in her tracks, falling silent for a second. As soon as they both heard the word "dark" they looked at each other tense and nervous, but with understanding.

"Do you think she knows it's not me?" he asked.

"How could she not know? If she thought it was you she'd be throwing herself into your arms all the time."

Knowing that she was well aware that it wasn't Bob he felt a mixture of emotions: sadness, anger, surprise, confusion, envy, jealousy... He found it hard to believe, and if that wasn't enough, Yelena added more information:

"______ told me you wanted it to be a secret, asked me not to tell anyone and to pretend I hadn't seen anything even with you- with them," she corrected herself quickly.

"Good God," he said getting up from the bed, pacing back and forth hysterically, "How did- How did he- How did they- Oh my God," he was overwhelmed by all the questions on his mind, but he didn't want Void to show up to answer them, let alone lose control of the body. "What should I do?" he asked looking at Yelena at last.

"First calm down and then talk to her. There is no other option."

Unfortunately she wasn't present in the tower, she had gone out for a while and because of that he went to ask Yelena for advice at that very moment. He had to wait for her to return, and the wait became eternal and deadly.

"What is it, honey?" she asked as she set her bag on her desk, her back to him. He wasn't surprised by the nickname as she often called him and the other men in the group that. They were in her bedroom, with the door closed. She had just arrived and didn't even have time to take off her shoes.

"By that do you mean me? Or Void?" He said behind her, trying not to sound too annoyed, and it was a good thing she had her back to him, because the way her face darkened wasn't at all disguised. She tried to recompose her facial expression before turning to look at him.

"What?" She asked pretending to be confused, though she really was, but in the way she was pretending to be.

"Don't play dumb with me," he said, not completely annoyed but clearly not happy — he was nervous and tired, eager for this awkward moment to be over as soon as possible. He didn't like confrontations, even if they were only verbal and seemingly peaceful.

"What do you know?" she asked, now really serious.

"Enough," he nodded, infected by her seriousness.

"And how do you know that?" she asked as she crossed her arms.

"That doesn't matter now," he replied. "What kind of relationship do you have?"

"We're dating," she reported matter-of-factly but still folded her arms, lifting her shoulders slightly and looking at the ground for a second. The confirmation from her side felt like a stab in Bob's chest. There it was again, that mix of emotions inside his chest.

"Okay, leave him," he said.

"Just because you say so?" she said sarcastically as she laughed, snorting through her nose. She didn't mean to be rude, but she wasn't liking the conversation and wanted to make her position clear. "I'm not leaving him," she said shaking her head subtly, "and he's not leaving me. Our love life is none of your business."

"A monster like him can't fall in love," he informed her, trying to talk some sense into her.

"He's not a monster, and he can," she said annoyed and hurt.

"It's impossible," he replied.

"No," she shook her head again, growing more and more annoyed and hurt.

"I mean- You're wonderful, but-" he hastened to correct himself, blushing slightly, closing his eyes tightly and holding up his hands.

"I know him better than you do Bob," she said.

"Better than me!?" He couldn't help laughing in the same way she laughed before, but the laughter didn't last long. "I just want to protect you," he said desperately now.

"I don't need your protection," she said annoyed.

"You're not safe with him!" he said, also annoyed.

"He's changed!" She opened her mouth to say something else, but was interrupted.

"Oh, you fixed him?" he said annoyed but with a smirk, laughing as he looked at her raising eyebrows.

Now she was the one stabbed in the chest. Her face softened, but not in amusement or joy, but in utter hurt. She looked at him as if he had betrayed her. Her eyes widened like discs as she listened in surprise at such audacity, but they also trembled, as did her narrowed lips. He quickly realised the mistake he had made, and in sorrow he approached her to try to take her hands and apologise, but she took a step back.

"...He talks to me better than you do," she said again, wrinkling her forehead as she subtly shook her head.

"𝖄𝖔𝖚'𝖗��� 𝖗𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙 𝕽𝖔𝖇𝖊𝖗𝖙, 𝖞𝖔𝖚 𝖆𝖑𝖜𝖆𝖞𝖘 𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖊 𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖘𝖊."

"Nonono," he said in despair at hearing that, overwhelmed by the situation and feeling himself losing control. His facial expression and body language changed in an instant, as did his tone. "Robert, the hero," he said sarcastically as he moved closer to her to calm her in his arms. "I swear I'd kill him if I could," he said as he kissed her head furiously, looking furiously at the nothingness behind her back.

"He means no harm..." she said softly as she hugged him tightly.

"But bad execution," he said as he pulled away from her to put his hands on her cheeks, making her stare at him. "Don't listen to him. I love you," he said seriously.

"I know..." she said, looking him in the eyes. "But..." She looked down, sorrowful.

"He's jealous, he thinks he's a better choice for you," he said as he released her cheeks to take her hands.

"What?" she asked confused.

"Yeah, he's been in love with you for a while. I've tried to contain it as much as I can."

"Oh..." she said crestfallen and thoughtful. "Don't torture him too much," she looked back into his eyes, "he's got enough, the poor guy," and he rolled his eyes as she let go of his hands, but he had no choice. "I'm sure he knows it from the others," she said annoyed as she leaned her buttocks on the edge of the desk, arms folded. "Maybe it's time to come forward..." She sighed deeply, thoughtfully and worriedly as he raised his arms and rested his head in his hands.

She didn't like having a secret relationship, but she was aware of the opinion others had of her partner. It made her sick to remember it now, but in the beginning she thought badly of him too. How things had changed... She fell completely at his feet, but she had no regrets — he gave her no reason to do so, surprisingly.

"I don't give a fuck about what they think of me," he said nonchalantly, "but I know that unfortunately you don't," he huffed in annoyance, lowering his arms. "Are you sure about that? You know their first impression of me wasn't a good one."

"Why is that?" She said sarcastically, to which he couldn't help but laugh, moving closer to her, dangerously close, and placing one of his hands on the side of her hips, dropping the weight of his body on his arm and ducking his head and gaze.

"I can behave, you know that," he said smirking, and also leering.

"You can when you shut your mouth because you want them to think you're Bob," she reminded him without returning his gaze, still slightly annoyed, but he knew it wasn't personal but with the situation.

"I'll try," he laughed quietly, "just for you," he said softer now, sweeter, "mm?" He asked as he lifted and moved her chin in his direction with the index finger of his free hand, causing her to look back at him. She couldn't help but smile, albeit tiredly, and nodded her head silently. But then he leaned closer to kiss her on the cheek, now provoking a genuine smile and a slight blush on her.

© trainer-from-unova / alicent burton | don’t plagiarise or translate any of my work

[zerosbubble]

hii i absolutely love your rookie series!! would you be open to writing something with tim and his boot slowly moving in with each other?? they leave things around his house during their father-kid bonding sessions (although he definitely denies it to the others) and just slowly starts to stay over at his place more often than their own. it gets to the point where they just permanently move in for comfort sake, maybe after something traumatic happens??

sorry if this is too specific or long T^T. love the series!!! tysm for writing for us ♡

Let’s go home, kid.

Tim Bradford x Rookie!reader [PLATONIC] — Masterlist

A/N: Hi, sweetheart! Don’t apologise, I love when you guys are specific about what you guys would like to read! 💞 Especially because this idea is super cute! (P.S, this is a separate storyline from my series, Like father, Like rookie, but you guys can imagine that it is if that’s why you guys like!)

Summary: What started as casual hangouts turned into something unspoken. Your things ended up in his house, and he never asked you to take them back. Then, after that night, he didn’t take you to your apartment—he took you home. His home. Maybe it had been yours all along.

It started with a rainstorm.

A bad one.

The kind that turned the streets into slick, flooded hazards and made every shift feel like a fight against nature itself.

By the time you and Tim wrapped up your last call for the night, you were both drenched—cold, exhausted, and in no mood to deal with LA’s nightmare traffic.

Tim had fully intended to just drop you off at your place. But when you slumped in the passenger seat, shivering, eyes heavy with fatigue, he sighed and made a split-second decision.

“Alright, Kid,” he muttered, flicking the blinker on. “You’re coming to mine.”

You barely stirred, half-asleep against the window. “Huh?”

“You’re soaked, I’m not leaving you to get sick and have a snotty rookie in my shop tomorrow,” he said gruffly. “You’ll crash at mine for the night.”

You didn’t argue. Didn’t even question it. Didn’t even roll your eyes at the ‘snotty rookie’ comment. Just let out a quiet, “M’kay,” and dozed off to the soft platters of the rain against the windows again.

Tim tried not to think about how much trust that meant you had in him.

By the time he pulled into his driveway, you were awake again—barely. He tossed you a hoodie and a towel, pointed you toward the bathroom, and made sure you had something warm to eat before you inevitably crashed on the couch.

He hadn’t expected it to happen again.

But then the next time a shift ran late, it was “Might as well stay, kid. Saves you the drive and I’d rather not have you asking for gas money again like an overgrown 16 year old who just got their first car.”

Then it was “I already got takeout, no point in you getting your own.” Matched with a classic Tim remark—“I’m not surprised you didn’t listen to the lessons about saving money in high school.”

It wasn’t intentional.

At least, that’s what Tim told himself the first time he spotted something of yours in his apartment.

It was small—a phone charger, coiled neatly on his kitchen counter. He hadn’t thought much of it at first. Just a forgotten item from one of those late night shifts that had you too exhausted to go home, totally not one of your your so-called “father-kid bonding sessions” (which he definitely did not call or acknowledge them).

Then it was a sweatshirt draped over the back of his couch. A spare uniform shirt folded in the corner of his laundry room. A six-pack of your favorite energy drinks shoved into his fridge.

Tim frowned at that one.

He distinctly remembered watching you put it in the cart last time you’d gone grocery shopping—not together, obviously—but somehow, it had ended up in his apartment. He hadn’t even noticed you stashing it away.

Then, something else.

A toothbrush.

Tim stared at the new addition to his bathroom counter, arms crossed, mouth pulled into a tight line.

This was getting out of hand.

He’d meant to bring it up. Ask when exactly you’d decided his place was an extension of yours.

Somewhere along the way, the father-kid bonding sessions had stopped being something he tolerated and turned into something he… looked forward to.

Not that he’d ever admit that.

Not even to himself.

Maybe it was because, despite how much he grumbled about it at work, the house felt less empty with your things scattered around. Maybe it was because your presence had stopped feeling like an intrusion and more like something inevitable.

Then came the real kicker—the night you crashed without a reason.

No rainstorm, no late shift, no excuse. Just you, wandering into his house after work with a bag of takeout and a casual, “Hey, figured I’d stop by.”

Tim had stared at you for a good five seconds.

You blinked back, unbothered, before holding up the bag. “I got your usual.”

He sighed, rubbing a hand down his face. “You do realize you have your own place, right?”

You shrugged, toeing off your shoes. “Yeah, but your WiFi’s better.”

Tim rolled his eyes. “Unbelievable.”

But he still took the takeout from your hands, setting it on the counter. And when you flopped onto his couch like you’d done it a hundred times before, flipping through his TV channels, he didn’t argue.

As much as Tim would’ve liked to keep it under wraps that you and him have somehow slipped into the routine of you being at his—Mid-Wilshire wasn’t as gullible as he’d like.

The teasing started slow.

At first, it was just Lopez giving Tim a pointed look when you and him walked into roll call together, both holding coffee cups that looked suspiciously like they came from the same place.

Then Nyla got in on it. “So,” she mused one morning, eyes flicking between the two of you, “you two just happened to arrive at the exact same time? Again?”

Tim didn’t even look up from his clipboard. “Traffic.”

Jackson, always the instigator that knew just how to add the right amount of fuel to the fire, smirked. “Yeah, traffic. Right, Boot?”

You just took a sip of your coffee, completely unfazed. “If I say yes, do I still get a good eval this month?”

Tim shot you a flat look.

Lucy was the one who finally pushed him over the edge. “You know,” she started, an innocent lilt in her voice, “it’s funny. I lived with you for a while, and I still got called ‘Boot.’ But them?” She nodded toward you. “Kid.”

The room hummed with interest.

Tim set his clipboard down with a sigh. “We’ve been over this before. They act like a kid, they get called one.”

Lucy snorted. “Sure, Dad.”

Tim’s jaw twitched like he wanted to just quit right then and there, God forbid. “I’m not their dad.”

Lopez grinned. “Oh? Then why do you two carpool?”

“Because I—” Tim clenched his jaw. “We don’t carpool.”

Jackson laughed. “Oh, yeah? Then why’d I see you waiting outside your truck for them the other morning?”

“I wasn’t waiting for them.”

Lucy crossed her arms. “Mhm. And why’d I hear them say, ‘I left my charger at home’ the other day, and then magically a charger appeared at their desk five minutes later?”

“Coincidence.”

Lopez tapped her chin. “And why did I hear them say they didn’t have food at home last week, and then, the next morning, hear them say, ‘Tim, your fridge is looking kinda empty’?”

Tim scowled. “We don’t live together.”

The whole room went quiet.

Then Grey’s voice cut through the silence. “Yet.”

Tim’s head snapped toward him. “Sir.”

Grey just raised an eyebrow, unimpressed.

You, meanwhile, were quietly enjoying your coffee like this had nothing to do with you.

And then, a few weeks later, the teasing stopped.

Not because it became routine to those back at Mid-Wilshire for you and Tim to live together.

Not because Tim snapped and told them to shut up about it. Not that they’d ever listen to him anyways.

Because something happened.

Something bad.

And suddenly, it wasn’t just you leaving things behind.

It wasn’t just staying over for convenience.

It was necessity.

Because after what happened, you couldn’t go back.

It was supposed to be a routine call.

Simple, in and out.

But those were always the ones that went sideways.

It happened so fast. One second, you were clearing a room, and the next—

Gunfire.

Searing pain in your side.

The world tilting as your legs gave out beneath you. You barely registered hitting the ground, too busy trying to force air into your lungs as panic clawed at your chest.

Then Tim was there. Dropping to his knees beside you, pressing his hands hard against the wound.

“Stay with me, kid.” His voice was sharp, but his eyes—his eyes were afraid.

You tried to stay calm, tried to keep your face blank like he’d taught you. But the pain was overwhelming, and your breath hitched, and suddenly, tears were pricking at your eyes, hot and unwelcome.

Tim’s expression barely shifted, but his grip on you tightened. “Hey, hey. You’re okay. We’ve got you—I’ve got you.”

His hand shook.

The sirens in the distance blurred into white noise.

You tried to speak, but all that came out was a ragged breath.

Tim swallowed hard. “I need you to breathe, kid. You hear me?”

You nodded weakly, trying to focus on his voice.

Trying not to focus on the blood pooling around you.

And then, darkness.

The hospital was quiet.

Tim sat at your bedside, staring at the IV in your arm, jaw clenched so tight it ached.

He hadn’t moved in hours.

Hadn’t let himself breathe properly since the second you hit the ground.

And now, as he sat there, watching the steady rise and fall of your chest, all he could think was:

This is my fault.

He should’ve checked the room himself. Should’ve had you cover the door instead. Should’ve done something different.

He ran a hand down his face, exhaling sharply. “I shouldn’t have let this happen.”

Silence.

Then—

A weak, hoarse voice.

“…wasn’t your fault, sir.”

Tim’s head snapped up.

Your eyes were barely open, heavy with exhaustion and pain meds. But there was no mistaking the way you looked at him—so sure, even now.

His throat tightened. “You got shot.”

You huffed a small, breathless laugh. “Yeah, I noticed.”

Tim’s jaw worked. “You almost—” He cut himself off, shaking his head. “You should’ve never been in that position.”

You blinked at him, tired but steady. “And if it were you? If you got shot, would you be sitting here blaming yourself?”

His silence was answer enough.

You gave him a small, knowing smile. “Didn’t think so.”

Tim exhaled slowly, rubbing his hands together. “You scared the hell out of me, Kid.”

“Sorry,” you murmured, voice barely above a whisper.

He shook his head. “Don’t apologize. Just—” He swallowed hard. “Just don’t do it again.”

You let out a weak chuckle. “I’ll try.”

And for the first time in hours, Tim let himself breathe.

You didn’t go home after you were discharged.

Because when it came time to leave the hospital, your legs still felt unsteady. Your apartment felt too empty.

And the nightmares—

Well. You weren’t ready to face them alone.

Tim didn’t ask questions. Didn’t make a big deal out of it. He just grabbed your bag and said—

“Let’s go home, kid.”

And somehow, that was enough.

The ride was quiet.

Not uncomfortable—just quiet.

Tim’s truck rumbled beneath you, headlights cutting through the dim evening, but neither of you said much because there was nothing to say.

Something unspoken had already been agreed upon.

When Tim said, Let’s go home, kid, you knew.

Knew that the home he was referring to wasn’t your apartment. It was his. And neither of you needed to say otherwise.

And so, the stop at your apartment was quick.

You moved through the space with a detached sort of efficiency, grabbing only what you needed. Clothes, a toothbrush, a few things you’d be annoyed not to have later.

Tim stayed quiet, standing near the door, arms crossed. Not pushing, not rushing—just there.

Watching.

Making sure you didn’t hesitate on whether or not you wanted to stay here, or go to his.

You didn’t. You never were one to when it came to staying over.

But when you went to grab your bag, slinging it over your shoulder, the sharp pull of your wound made you wince.

It was subtle. Barely even a flinch. But Tim caught it.

And without a word, he stepped forward, plucked the bag out of your hands, and slung it over his own shoulder instead.

Like it was the most natural thing in the world.

His free hand ruffled your hair as he passed. “C’mon, kid.”

You huffed but didn’t protest, following him out the door, and never once did you look back.

Tim’s place felt…

Safe.

Not in the way a fortress felt safe. Not in the way an apartment with deadbolts and security cameras felt safe.

It was different.

The kind of safe that was quiet. Steady. Unquestioned. Like you could close your eyes here and not feel on edge.

Tim dropped your bag in the spare room without ceremony, moving through the house like it was just another night. He tossed his keys on the counter, opened the fridge, pulled out a couple of bottles of water.

“You hungry?” he asked, like you hadn’t just gotten out of the hospital. Like you hadn’t just been shot. Like you were just here because—

Because you were here.

Like it was normal.

And maybe, in some way, it was.

You shook your head, taking the water he offered. “Not really.”

Tim just nodded, popping open his own bottle. “Let me know if that changes.”

It wasn’t a command. Just a quiet acknowledgment.

An unspoken you’re allowed to need things here. And for the first time in days, your chest felt a little lighter.

Moments blurred as the two of you settled in. The weight of the contrast between the last time you were at his and now was heavier than the two of you expected.

The TV flickered, casting dim light across the living room. Some random movie played in the background—not that either of you were really watching it.

You were curled into the corner of the couch, a blanket draped over your legs, eyes half-lidded with exhaustion but stubbornly refusing to sleep.

Tim sat on the other end, one arm resting along the back of the couch, water bottle still in his grip.

The room was quiet, but it wasn’t empty.

Not like his house usually was, not with you here.

He glanced over at you, taking in the way your shoulders had finally started to relax, the way you looked comfortable for the first time in days ever since the days you spent in the hospital before being discharged.

And something settled in his chest.

At first, he’d thought he was letting you stay because you needed it. Because you needed space, needed to feel safe. Because, after everything, you deserved that.

But sitting here now, watching the way your breathing had evened out, the way the tension had finally bled from your frame—

He realized the truth.

He needed you here.

More than you needed him.

Tim sighed, shaking his head to himself, a bittersweet revelation that hit him like a truck rooted from you quite literally bleeding out in his arms.

He reached over, ruffled your hair just enough to be annoying.

Your tired grumble made him huff a quiet laugh.

“Go to sleep, kid.”

And this time?

You did.

Taglist: @its-ares @nevereclipse @chezze-its @mcckunty

[starcurtain]

Female Guidance in Aventurine's Life

One thing I haven't seen discussed in much depth yet, but which I think is especially interesting, is the consistency of female guidance in Aventurine's life: Every single person who we have seen on screen offering Aventurine assistance or making a positive difference in his life is female (with one exception, yes, I'll get there).

Under the read more cause it's longggg:

Before even diving into his family, let's just get the obvious out of the way: Aventurine is, at least supposedly, blessed by a goddess. The very origin of his good fortune--be it actual blessing or curse--comes from the literal "mother goddess" who watches over him. This is one of the only instances in Star Rail where a god character is specifically given a gender, and Gaiathra is not ever ambiguous. She is the classic female fertility goddess with all the trappings of other famous triple goddess figures of the real world. Aventurine's personal belief in the goddess may be shaky, but he nevertheless continues to treasure his people's faith. Thus, at the core, we can say Aventurine is a character who is guarded by the most quintessential mother figure possible.

Now, with the most obvious out of the way:

We know that Aventurine's father died before Aventurine was even born, and therefore he would not have any memories of his father, leaving him to be raised by his mother and sister.

Both women clearly made an enormous and lasting impression on Aventurine; they haunt every single one of his memories of Sigonia and are the key elements of the family Aventurine longs to return to. While he flirts with the concept of death as a way to see his family members again, it was also his mother and sister who instilled in him any sense of self-worth and meaning to his existence, the only things keeping him from giving up on living. His mother believed him to be blessed; his sister insisted to his face that not even the only remaining remnant of their mother had any value in comparison to his life.

It is for his sister that Aventurine first begins expressing a self-sacrificial nature, and from his sister that this self-sacrifice is reinforced when she uses herself as a shield to help him escape massacre at the hands of the Katicans.

It is also from his sister that Aventurine learns many of the deeply meaningful actions he holds onto to the present day, despite having been so far removed from his own culture.

Conversely, every one of Aventurine's early negative experiences on screen appear to have been driven (at least primarily) by men.

Although the Katican tribe of course would have both men and women, the tribal societies on Sigonia appear to be on the fairly traditional side, with Aventurine's mother staying at the camp with her child while his father was the one to go out and hunt for offerings for Gaiathra. This is also supported by Aventurine asking Jade to take him to her "chief" later on. Therefore, it is likely (although of course not guaranteed) that a majority of the Katicans' army was male, and that Aventurine's early experiences with outsiders consisted almost entirely of indiscriminate pillaging and massacre at the hands of what the Avgin viewed as savage, invading warriors. In separate instances, Aventurine was traumatized by these warrior figures three times--first with the loss of his father, then his mother, and then finally his sister.

And even their hope, supposed to come in the form of the "men in black" from the IPC, completely abandoned them, leaving Aventurine once again betrayed by masculine figures that were supposed to be there to protect him. Led by Oswaldo Schneider, another cruel male authority figure, the Marketing Department of the IPC permitted the wholesale slaughter of Aventurine's people--something which we know Aventurine is now aware of.

Then, of course, the next piece of Aventurine's backstory we're given is his male slave master. I don't really need to say anything about this, do I? This man violated Aventurine's human dignity and bodily autonomy, and forced Aventurine's hand in a life or death battle for which Aventurine still punishes himself mentally, even years in the future.

In part to escape the difficulty of his situation and rise to a position where he would have enough resources to--he thought--help his people, Aventurine joins up with the IPC. But when he attempts to make contact with a powerful man in the organization, Diamond, he is instead met by a woman, Jade, who against Aventurine's own expectations determines that she will raise Aventurine up (or use him as a tool, depending on how you currently choose to interpret Jade's motivations), granting him wealth and status beyond his imagination.

(And this line in particular is interesting, because you can take it one of two ways: 1) Aventurine comes from a patriarchal planet that traditionally put men into positions of power [thereby making his own slavery an emasculating act, aligning him further with disenfranchised women]; thus, he is making the assumption that to get anywhere in this organization, he will need to work with a man; or 2) He actually was counting on Jade taking his bet and helping him right from the beginning, because Aventurine perceives women as inherently more likely to protect and aid him than men would be.)

In the end, Jade does exactly as she claims she will, launching Aventurine into a position of power while also closing golden handcuffs around his wrists. She positions herself not only as his supervisor, but as his advocate and ally. She entrusts him with her Cornerstone, a sign of significant faith in his abilities. She even seems to be keenly aware of his bias towards the mother figure, referring to him as "child" in their conversations.

Whether this is genuine or a manipulation tactic can certainly be debated (and I'm not inclined to think at this point that Jade is a genuinely good role model or selflessly supportive person in Aventurine's life), but whatever the case, women are the only people Aventurine even remotely considers to be "in his corner."

We see this even earlier, in Aventurine's call to Topaz. Like with the example of his mother and sister, Aventurine trusts in Topaz's ability implicitly, and considers her above anyone else when it comes to completing the mission in Penacony.

Although of course we don't know if Aventurine has any other friends or allies among the Strategic Investment Department, it seems very likely that Topaz, yet another woman, is the one he is closest with. At the very least, she is the only IPC character (so far) that Aventurine has a complimentary voice line for, one that shows his respect for her talent:

Over and over again, the story aligns Aventurine with female figures in positions of authority, and demonstrates that he is comfortable (although maybe not too comfortable, in the case of Jade) with relying on them and trusting their judgment, just as he did with his mother and sister.

And this pretty much goes off the charts in Penacony, where Aventurine has more involvement with the female cast than virtually any other non-female character (even the Trailblazer!). We set the pattern off right away, with Aventurine immediately being placed into a negotiation situation with Himeko, respecting her role as the Express's leader and working to get himself aligned with the Express by acquiescing to her request for support.

Then there's the fact that Aventurine is the one who finds Robin's body, an event which, although he didn't let it show too much, was almost certainly traumatic for him, given the violent death of his own sister.

Next, twice in Penacony's story, we see Aventurine seek out Sparkle for information. He may not personally like her and her comments may be both racist and dehumanizing, but Aventurine does rely on her--being the only character explicitly seeking her aid, which no one else in Penacony seems to want.

In 2.0...

And in 2.1.

Now, say it with me, guys: Aventurine built an entire portion of his grand plan around the idea that if he looked pathetic enough, a female character would absolutely come and help him. And sure enough, the women come through for him, always! Sparkle gives him the exact last clue he needs to confirm his belief that he could use "Death" to reach the true Penacony, sealing the deal for the rest of his plan.

His plan which also hinged significantly on Black Swan's involvement too, another woman that he views as, if not trustworthy, then at least intelligent and hyper-competent.

Contrast all this, of course, with the treatment Aventurine receives at the hands of Sunday, the lone opposing male character he faces in Penacony.

Sparkle implies that Sunday would humiliate Aventurine in an unmistakably sexual and degrading way, and Sunday himself professes this same desire to see Aventurine humiliated.

Then we're "treated" to the moment in which Sunday uses the Harmony's (or perhaps actually the Order's?) power against Aventurine, in a scene which is supposed to reflect an interrogation but is also, very clearly, another nonconsensual violation of Aventurine's bodily autonomy and dignity by a man. While ostensibly seeking confirmation of the Cornerstone ruse, Sunday instead subjects Aventurine to unnecessary questions about his past on Sigonia, which recall and force Aventurine to re-endure memories of his trauma.

Even if this is what Aventurine prepared himself for and planned to have happen, the pain he experiences is very real, and he suffers both the physical and emotional consequences of Sunday's assault all the way up to his "Death" and possibly even beyond.

(Also, Sunday fans please don't get too up in arms with me for this; I also like Sunday! It's okay for characters to be morally grey!)

I think there's one other interesting example I would bring up here too, and that's Aventurine's conscious decision to weaponize his own masculinity against the Trailblazer. Through the 2.0 and 2.1 Trailblaze missions, Aventurine deliberately acts in an off-putting manner to the Astral Express crew, particularly the Trailblazer, in order to build up to the 2.1 climax where the Trailblazer is supposed to view him as an unrepentant villain and attack him without hesitation.

In order to achieve this uncomfortable, villainous effect, what does Aventurine do? Exactly what other men have done to him.

This is especially apparent if you're playing Stelle because of the ingrained societal taboo of a man entering a woman's personal space without consent, but even as Caelus, it is very clear that Aventurine is leveraging behaviors typically used to show dominance: In a complete 180 to all Aventurine's other body language in the game (normally quite withdrawn, frequently in defensive postures with his arms crossed or hand behind his back, almost always standing several feet away from other people), Aventurine violates the Trailblazer's personal bubble, looming over them (Caelus was sitting in this cutscene, lol), forcing eye contact, and commanding the space while informing them that they will have no choice.

For someone who was hunted, enslaved, had his movements restricted with chains, and due to his own slight stature has very likely been towered over by others who were intentionally asserting their power over him all his life, it is clear that Aventurine associates dominant, typically more masculine-coded physically-imposing behaviors with discomfort and even villainy.

Any girl who has ever had a man loom over her like this will realize very quickly: Aventurine wanted to make himself scary so he made himself act more like a bad man.

(Yes of course I know "not all men." I'm not saying every man behaves in this domineering way or that women cannot be domineering too, obviously, just that Aventurine had a very specific image in mind when constructing a "villainous persona," and the physically controlling tactics most typically used by aggressive men toward women was his immediate go-to.)

But where does that leave Dr. Ratio, the one male character actually on Aventurine's side?

Frankly, I don't want to derail my post about how intensely Hoyo chose to hammer on the message of "Women will protect you" in Aventurine's story with a discussion about a mlm ship, but the take-away here is going to lead in that direction anyway--so yes, Dr. Ratio is the exception.

What is interesting is that he does not come across as an exception at first, and in fact initially appears as another male character being rude and dismissive to Aventurine. Like, there are still people out there calling Ratio an unrepentant racist for this one.

Of course, it's later clarified that this is an act--likely even these insults were scripted specifically to give Sunday's spying ears the "insight" he needed to exploit Aventurine during the interrogation.

But even though it is an act, Aventurine still has noticeable trouble putting his faith in Ratio. He does genuinely doubt him a few times, despite knowing that they are working together to fool the Family.

Even his voice line about Ratio confirms that he doesn't think Ratio particularly cares for him; rather, he thinks Ratio simply tolerates him because he's slightly less unintelligent than those around them.

Ultimately, the entire act with Ratio ends up being a mirror of the real scenarios Aventurine has been experiencing with men his whole life (at least as far as we are shown his life). Men abandon him to fend for himself (unwillingly, like his father, or willingly, like Diamond leaving Aventurine to deal with Penacony alone on the inside). Ratio keeps leaving Aventurine completely alone. Men attempt to humiliate him and violate his boundaries (like Sunday and his slave master). Ratio insults Aventurine's appearance and intelligence repeatedly. Men betray him (like Oswaldo Schneider and his men leaving the Avgin to die). Ratio "betrays" him.

I'm not saying when Aventurine devised the plan for their act, he consciously drew up a list of all the ways men had hurt him in the past and had Ratio re-enact them one by one, but like... that's what happened, whether or not Aventurine intended it.

And okay, the shrinking scene in Dewlight Pavilion was just for fun and probably only slightly fetishy, the devs promise; yes, it was supposed to be a joke! ...But it's also not a mistake that this is yet another instance of a male character in a glaringly metaphorical position of power over Aventurine. Aventurine's tiny in this scene! He's completely vulnerable! He's in a dangerous position and the male character could very much hurt him in this moment.

But Ratio doesn't. (In fact, his line here is supposed to be sarcastic, very ha ha--but also, what is Ratio really saying? "I won't do anything to you without your express consent." What a good guy.)

Virtually everything negative that we see in 2.1 is Ratio doing these things as an act at Aventurine's own request. He doesn't actually disdain Aventurine; his own voiceline about Aventurine reinforces that he sees Aventurine as talented and intelligent.

Whatever you think he was apologizing for in their early scene, he's the only person we're ever shown in-game apologizing to Aventurine at all.

He worked hard to "betray" Aventurine but only as he was instructed to do, and immediately checks in on Aventurine's well-being afterward, even urging him to give up the plan if it becomes too much to handle.

And then, of course, there's the note: "Do stay alive. I wish you the best of luck."

After this point, it cannot be denied that Ratio is unequivocally on Aventurine's side, wants to help him, and is not doing so out of any sense of self-gain but largely because he is a good person who simply cares about Aventurine's fate. By the end of 2.1, it can no longer be doubted that Ratio is the exception to the "gender rule" of Aventurine's life, which--the story shows us again and again--was that guidance, protection, and care for Aventurine come from women, while men repeatedly represent dismissal, betrayal, or pain.

Ratio is, at least as far as Aventurine's story shows us, the proof that men can be good, that things are not as black and white in Aventurine's life as they might appear, and that--if you do choose to ship him with or see Aventurine as attracted to men--his attraction could be validated (and potentially reciprocated) by a male figure who would not bring additional harm to Aventurine's life. Aventurine makes the final decision to live after seeing Ratio's note--the exception to the rule ultimately proves to be the last piece needed to keep him alive.

But I promised I wasn't going to derail my own post about w o m e n, so let me get to the final point, and the one I really wanted to talk about: Although Ratio gets virtually all the credit for "saving" Aventurine in the fandom, Aventurine was actually saved by, you guessed it, another woman.

Not going to lie, the reason I started this post was specifically because I wanted to talk about how Acheron and Aventurine's dynamic was completely unexpected but actually fits flawlessly with the theme of feminine guidance in Aventurine's story.

Despite the fact that Aventurine made Acheron's life much harder and actively used her as a chip in his grand gamble, she doesn't blame or chastise him for those actions. Although she expresses some incredulity that Aventurine is actually that lucky, she then turns around and congratulations him for his ingenuity, immediately supporting him despite the fact that they don't even truly know each other.

Then it gets even more interesting. Acheron, who frequently hits her companions with deep and sometimes very emotionally fraught questions, asks Aventurine: "Have you never wavered?"

We as players know for a fact that Aventurine is constantly wavering, constantly doubting himself, his luck, and whether he'll even live--or even wants to live--to see tomorrow. But we also know that Aventurine is not forthcoming about those truths, refusing to express them to anyone, even himself. The only way we hear those dark truths is through his "future" self (who by the way, is once again another male figure cutting Aventurine down--of course it's himself but it's also, from the player's perspective, once again reinforcing the message that he isn't going to find safety or kindness in an adult male presence). Aventurine almost constantly deflects and diverts when his emotions or struggles are brought to the fore (unless he's divulging them for the specific purpose of allowing someone else to weaponize them). "I'm fine," he says, like a lying liar who lies.

But he doesn't lie to Acheron.

He chooses to be completely candid with her, to lance open the deepest wound of his life--that he can win and win and win and still have lost everything. The glitz and the glamour has all been stripped away here, at the end of everything, and Aventurine finally feels safe enough to admit that he fears he has absolutely nothing in his life worth living for.

And then, we get this direct parallel: Aventurine looks to Acheron, the woman now before him, for guidance, for explanation, exactly as he looked to his sister in the past.

He needs help, he needs answers, and he is continually seeking that help from the female figures in his life, whose support and kindness echo the lost care of his mother and sister.

"Go where you should be," Acheron tells Aventurine, guiding him across the river of death just as his sister insisted that he flee through the rain toward life.

Look guys, Acheron's even the one who reminds Aventurine to look at Ratio's note in the first place because apparently being an emanator of Nihility gives you x-ray vision, but my girl just gets no credit at all for being Aventurine's real savior, come on now!! Yes, Ratio's note was the final reminder Aventurine needed that someone would be waiting for him on the other side, but Aventurine would never have even gotten to the point of being willing to read that note if Acheron hadn't stepped in and provided him an answer to his question.

She feeds him back his own answer: "Why does life slumber? To rehearse the death for which we are not currently prepared." It is Acheron who reminds Aventurine that giving into the Nihility is pointless, and that rather than simply embracing a meaningless death, it is up to humanity itself to find and make meaning by living. It's this, not Ratio's note, that Aventurine gives as his reason for choosing to go on when asked by his own younger self. It's Acheron's words that finally give Aventurine an answer--why do we live just to die? Because there are people we can still make proud. Because when we go into death, we should do so with our heads held high, having achieved our own sense of purpose in this life.

Ratio gave Aventurine a promise: Someone is waiting for you to come back.

But Acheron gave Aventurine a reason: If life is inherently meaningless, doesn't that just mean you are free to give it meaning yourself?

She saved him, as women have been saving him all his life.

Anyway, this has already been horrendously long, but really what I wanted to say is that I think it is absolutely fascinating how consistent Aventurine's writing is when it comes to portraying where his support comes from and who he seeks guidance from. (Psst, just in case you still haven't figured it out, it's women!) In virtually every instance we are shown, we see the message reinforced that women are Aventurine's greatest allies and role models, while male figures are continually positioned to intentionally or unintentionally let him down and cause him distress.

"But women playing the supporting role to a male character is nothing new, Star, why are you so excited by this?"

Because the role women are playing in Aventurine's life is not the subservient supporter and emotional crutch role that female characters all too often play to male counterparts. None of the women in Penacony or Aventurine's past were there to do the emotional labor for him, to be a trophy or prize, or to cater to his needs. They don't exist solely to help him fulfill his character motivations; they aren't following him around waiting for his next request as their only role in the plot.

Instead, with Aventurine's story, we almost have an inversion of gender roles, where the male character eschews the stereotypical "men are leaders, fighters, and stoic heroes" archetype. Instead, no matter how hard he tries to hide it and keep a stiff upper lip, it is clear from 2.0-2.1's story that Aventurine is a deeply insecure, lonely, and explicitly traumatized survivor of genocide, slavery, and exploitation. Unlike most male characters, who are very rarely portrayed as genuine victims--because come on, shouldn't men be strong enough to fight back? Shouldn't men be able to shrug it off when they are hurt, emotionally or physically? (Of course I'm rolling my eyes here!)--Aventurine is belittled, humiliated, emasculated, and victimized on-screen, roles almost exclusively reserved for women, for whom surviving victimization in fiction is seen as noble.

Meanwhile, the women in Aventurine's life take on the roles traditionally given to male characters. They're both emotionally and physically his protectors. Aventurine's sister gave her life to guard his safety; Acheron ensured he could safely pass beyond the river of Nihility into the Primordial Dreamscape. They give him the tools necessary to succeed where he could not succeed on his own. His plan could never have gotten off the ground without Topaz and Jade entrusting their Cornerstones to him. The knowledge and capabilities of the women around him--not their "feminine charms"--are what allow them to help keep Aventurine on the right path even though he does waver. Even women who disrespect him, like Sparkle, still play a positive role in his life, able to provide him insight gained with their own intellect and talents.

When he has no one to rely on and doesn't know what to do, Aventurine is able to continually turn to the women around him, asking for and receiving not servitude or fawning, but their genuine wisdom and guidance.

tl;dr: If nobody else has him, Aventurine knows this random woman he met two minutes ago on the street will have him, because the women in his life literally never let him down.

(It's just so, so good, and ultimately, it should be very clear why Aventurine's story is as popular with women as it is! A+, Hoyo!)

[spacelattae]

Uh Jazzop Angst Teaser

One day I will make my baby Jazz happy. Today is not that day.

Jazz was a good friend. 

Jazz was a good friend. 

That’s what he told himself, at least, every time he walked through the enormous golden palace that had once belonged to Sentinel Prime and was now being rebuilt for the autobot cause— in a more utilitarian, less obnoxiously opulent manner, of course. It now hosted a war room, a surveillance room, the armory had grown exponentially, it was ringed with tough walls, and Optimus was even trying to get the giant tower to expand upward and breach the surface so they could reclaim the land that was once lost to them. 

But he hardly paid that any mind now, not when he was on a very secret and special mission that involved him sneaking through the shadows like a wraith and keeping his chatty nature on hold for just a moment. He prided himself on being decidedly stealthy when he needed to be, something Prowl had always hated him for because it made it so easy to play practical jokes on him whenever he wanted. Poor mech was probably traumatized, to be very honest. 

But, well, there were no practical jokes to be played now, because Jazz was currently tailing Optimus Prime, the now-glorious leader of the Autobots, whose very presence sent a reverent silence sweeping over the halls he walked through. 

And whose constantly frustratingly sad face was starting to actually piss Jazz off. 

He kept his battlemask up more often than not now, Jazz noticed. But it wasn’t enough to hide the way his optics somehow seemed duller with every passing day, even with a t-cog and the Matrix of Leadership imbuing him with power beyond reckoning every waking moment. You would think the presence of these things would make a mech more alive, but no— Optimus Prime seemed more dead inside than Orion Pax ever had, even covered in soot and grime and weary and drained from hard work in the mines. Orion Pax had always had a smile on his face. Orion Pax’s optics were always full of laughter and life. Orion Pax had always retained a mischievous streak to rival Jazz’s own, and Jazz could not count the number of times they’d rolled together, breathless with laughter, over a silly series of shenanigans they’d gotten up to on one of their rare shifts off together. 

Optimus Prime, although he was now larger and stronger and wiser, had not laughed since the moment D-16— no, Megatron— had left. 

And, see, it was up to Jazz to change that! Always had been. Optimus had named him Second In Command, and Jazz would be damned if he didn’t live up to that important title. And look, one of his jobs— literally, in the job description— was keeping troop morale high, right? And… Optimus was one of the troops? 

Jazz was just being a good friend here. His spark definitely did not skip a beat when he met Optimus Prime’s vivid blue optics, his plating did not shudder with heat and charge when Optimus placed a comforting servo on his shoulder, his cabling didn’t thrum to life when Optimus shot him one of his rare smiles. No. That wasn’t real. 

…

It definitely wasn’t what Optimus needed right now, in any case! He didn’t need that whole burden on his already-burdened shoulders, that Jazz had been hopelessly in love with him for cycles even though he knew it could never happen because Orion Pax and D-16 were a pair that could never be separated. They were a match forged by Primus. They were Thing 1 and Thing 2. Hammer and nail. Gold and blue. What D-16 had that Jazz didn’t, he would never know; and he certainly would never forgive that idiot, dumbaft, stupid mech for having the entire world in the palm of his servos and then throwing it away like it was nothing. He had Orion, he’d always fragging had Orion, and he took it for granted. He. Left. When he could have had everything he ever could have wanted.

And now Optimus, dragging his pedes more and more the closer he got to his chambers as if he was running out of the willpower to keep himself going, was suffering for it. The thing was, maybe so was Jazz, because he didn’t know how much longer he could keep playing this twisted game of pretend anymore. 

Jazz was a good friend.

Yeah, sure, but friends didn’t sneak through the halls in the middle of night to quietly knock on the heavy metal door to one’s berthroom, now did they? Friends didn’t lean in the doorway casually, sacrificing sleep to crack jokes that didn’t reflect the pain in their spark just to see a shadow of a smile on a face that was once always lit with laughter. 

Friends didn’t know, intimately, how the other’s dermas always, without fail, tasted distinctly of salt and bitter tears. 

“Jazz,” Optimus murmured against his dermas as he was swiftly dragged in through the doorway and promptly lunged in for a hungry kiss— because Jazz would take any part of Optimus he could get, even when it meant nothing at all. “Jazz, I thought we said not tonight.”

“You can’t fool me, Bossbot,” Jazz smirked with a bravado he didn’t feel as he looked up and traced the haggard lines of Optimus’s faceplates with optics he was grateful were hidden by his visor. Else perhaps Optimus would have seen the worry there, the concern, the pain, the sparkbreak. “I saw you in the War Room today. You were completely out of it.”

Optimus sighed, long and heavy, and let Jazz push him onto his berth so he sat on its edge, his large servos coming to rest at their usual comforting position at Jazz’s hips as he stood between the Prime’s powerful thighs. Slowly, Optimus let his helm dip forward and hit Jazz’s right shoulder with a heavy clunk, his entire frame sagging with it. Instinctively, Jazz reached up to cradle the back of Optimus’s helm, tracing the intricate grooves there. 

“That obvious?” the Prime mumbled, his deep voice reverberating through Jazz’s frame, and Jazz let out a quiet laugh. 

“A little,” he chuckled, to which Optimus turned his helm so he was frowning at Jazz with a disapproving look. “Well. Obvious to me. Your optic color was a hex-code too off for it to be normal.”

And then Jazz immediately wanted to shoot himself in the mouth, because seriously what kind of just-friend notices that kind of stuff and okay now I’m busted and he’s going to be so suspicious and—

But Optimus just looked at him with optics that were too-soft, his face without his battlemask looking so much like the old Orion Pax with the constantly-upturned dermas Jazz’s spark ached. “Only you would notice that,” he smiled, amused, and yes, score, that was GREAT. “You’re far too perceptive to let me get away with things. It’s why you are a wonderful Second.”

Jazz’s spark swelled and sputtered out in the same few klicks. 

“So,” Jazz coughed, trying to hide the way he was flushing brighter with every passing moment, “what was it this time, glorious leader?”

And although Jazz was sure he knew what Optimus was going to say, and although he knew that the smile would fade and his face would fall, that didn’t make it sting any less when Optimus turned his face away, his optics dulling again sadly. 

“We saw him today,” he murmured, seemingly oblivious to how every word was a stab to Jazz’s very spark. “D— I mean. Megatron. On patrol. He shot at Bluestreak, even when we told him we meant no aggression.”

“Hm,” Jazz made a small noise in the back of his throat, wondering why he’d never put two and two together that this was probably why Bluestreak had been in the infirmary for the past couple of hours. But Optimus hadn’t reported it, or anything— so no one had any reason to assume. He was sure the Prime read the question flashing in his visitor before Jazz had the chance to ask it, however. 

“It was an interaction of little consequence,” he murmured hurriedly. “I just… I didn’t know what to make of it. He shot Bluestreak, and when I cried out, he— I don’t know. He seemed to let it go. He let us go.”

Jazz didn’t know what to say to this, but he could feel the pain lashing out from Optimus’s usually-tight EM field, he could see the absolute sadness in his optics, he could feel the pain emanating from every cable in his entire being. And so Jazz said nothing, just cradled Optimus’s face in both his servos and looked right into his optics, tilting his helm. 

“Do you want to forget it?” Jazz asked quietly, his voice rasping an octave deeper as he watched the Prime’s optics dilate, just the slightest bit. 

Optimus had never said no— not after the first time Jazz had assured his shaking and crying form it was alright with him. He didn’t mind. 

Jazz was a good friend. 

And so when Optimus whispered a soft: “yes,” Jazz did not hesitate before dipping his helm down and capturing those soft dermas again with a gentle, brushing kiss, this one just a feather-light touch in the beginning before Optimus’s servo snaked to the back of Jazz’s helm and pulled him in deeper. Unbidden, Jazz flicked his visor back, something he reserved for only those he trusted the very most, with every corner of his spark— and who better than Optimus, who had laughed with him and looked out for him since the very beginning? Whose spark was so pure Primus himself saw it fit to bless him as one of his chosen? Who was as kind and gentle as he was strong, who never lost his temper and who handled the bots around him with a sound processor? 

And, moreover— he knew Optimus liked it this way. 

After all, D-16 never had a visor, did he?

Even after countless nights of this same routine, Optimus was still as gentle with him as he’d always been, asking softly before hooking a strong servo around Jazz’s waist to pull him into his lap, their frames sparking with charge. 

Salt. Jazz tasted salt again, and before he knew it, his lips were traveling down to Optimus’s neck cabling, drawing precious gasps and ragged vents from his powerful frame. To say Optimus Prime throwing his helm back and moaning from Jazz’s skilled tongue was an understatement— nipping at his neck cabling and feeling him writhe was close to Jazz’s favorite thing in all of Cybertron. 

“Focus on me,” he murmured as Optimus shuddered with optics shut in pleasure, holding Jazz gently, close, as if afraid he would break. Or as if pretending his frame was a little broader, a little bulkier, a little more silver. “Focus on me, Optimus Prime.”

“I can make you forget.”

Now if only there was a way for Jazz to forget the steady, painful pulsing of his own spark reminding him that, as always, this was just a little game of pretend, and the morning would come as it always did.

With Jazz in Second, as he always was.

[seresinhangmanjake]

The One I Want: Part 8

Jake "Hangman" Seresin x plus size!reader

Summary: You’re new in town and some guy named Jake is about to be your roommate. Being skeptical of new people keeps you lonely and uninterested in any entanglements, but Jake is desperate to change that.

Notes/Warnings: traumatic past, trust issues, cursing, very likely typos

Words: 1951

The One I Want Masterlist

You don't remember how you got to the couch. You don’t remember whose idea it was, or who guided who, or who first fell onto the cushions and pulled the other with them. Jake’s lips have kept you from retaining that information, not that it is of much importance, anyway. It doesn’t change that you are where you are, your legs draped over Jake’s thighs, your fingers woven through the ends of his hair, with his hand latched onto your hip. Your lips have barely had a moment apart since you relieved his concern with your smile and he went back in for a second kiss. Bodies have requested a few decent breaths here and there, but nothing keeps you separated for long. 

His kiss is demanding, but not controlling. It’s a kiss unwanting to break, but willing to do so if that is what you need. And his touch follows a similar pattern. Jake is not shy when his hand ventures past your hip, but he’s still cautious. The warmth of his palm sliding over your ass and pulling you closer is gently done, and when he travels up to your flannel sleep shirt and fingers dip under the fabric, he stops just after two knuckles are hidden past the hem. Fingertips grazing your skin are enough to cause shivers of pleasure, but they are still careful not to cross a line. 

You’re not actually sure if a line is there for him to cross, yet somehow you both know the possibility exists that it is hiding in plain sight. It might be that his touch an inch or two closer to your breast could ignite a panic response. His fingers playing with the buttons that hold your shirt closed or the tie that keeps your shorts around your hips could have you jumping out of his hold. And with such unpredictability, you appreciate that Jake doesn’t take that risk because you don’t want to stop this. You want to stay as you are, connected as much as you can safely be connected.

Jake has stolen minutes, maybe hours, from your morning—although, you suppose it can’t be considered stealing if you’re freely giving them to him and intentionally surrendering to the way he's making you feel. Any grasp on time disappeared long ago, but you couldn’t possibly be more content. In Jake’s arms, you have chosen to loosen your connection to the space around you and he has led you to a place where nothing else, especially not your past, matters. 

And you like it here, in this place. Every available reality suspends. Here, you are not damaged. You are not imperfect. A man like Jake wants you. You believe you’ll never have to leave this town because no one is going to say anything to you that will make it unbearable. Here, there’s the suggestion of a future. Here, you can feel your feet start to plant into the ground.

—

“You’re beautiful, you know,” he says. 

You stopped kissing some time ago and he’s taken to staring at you, scanning your features, touching your kiss-swollen lips with a proud smile on his face that says “This was my doing”. 

“I’ve thought so since I came through the front door and saw you standing right about…” he shifts on the couch to get the entrance of the apartment in clear view. With eyes squinting as if to find an exact measurement, his finger points to the spot where you stood the night you first met him. “Right about there.”

Your eyes briefly follow his finger. “I thought you were disappointed.”

“Oh no,” Jake chuckles with a light shake of his head. He looks down, almost as if embarrassed, and watches his hand run back and forth over your bare knee. “No, that certainly wasn’t the case. And Nat teased me for it immediately,” he says. 

Your brows shoot up. “Teased you?”

“Yeah,” is a long-drawn word. His lips curve into a smile and his eyes find yours again. “She knew I was gonna be a goner.”

When you try to conceal your blush by looking down at your fiddling hands, Jake’s grin widens. “Don’t hide,” he says, leaning over to tilt your chin back up with his thumb and index finger. “I like it.”

“You like what?”

From your cheekbone to your jaw, his knuckle draws a soft line over the pink shade of your cheek. “This.”

You would feel more self-conscious about the blush spreading to your ears and chest if not for the light rosy tint making its way onto his cheeks at the same moment. It’s a lovely shade that blends so well with his complexion and instantly confirms that what you saw at the bonfire was not a trick of the flame's glow. Your abdomen clenches with the sensation of velvety wings fluttering throughout your stomach, but the feeling disperses when a pang of something else hits deep in your chest. 

Jake is already so comfortable with his kissing and touching of you. Though he is thoughtful, he doesn’t hesitate or question what he’s doing. He holds on to you like he’s done it a thousand times before. Your bodies mold to this couch as if the position you are sitting in was imprinted into the cushions long ago. He somehow knows what you like; he knows how to kiss you like a man who has been studying you for years. It all comes so naturally—to you and him—that it teeters on the cusp of unreal, and is, therefore, slightly unsettling. 

Typically, you’re careful; more calculated in your interactions with people. You aim to avoid putting yourself in positions where you lose your sense of control, and yet, for Jake you let it all go. With Jake, you’re allowing the revival of parts of yourself that were slowly fading from lack of use, but it forces you to wonder if you’re capable of maintaining that freedom without him there to help you. You don’t want to clam up if he’s out of reach. You owe it to Jake to try to apply everything he’s given you so you can do right by him. If you hurt him from an inability to let yourself remain open, you expect you won’t find of self-forgiveness. 

You don’t realize you’re staring off into space, your eyes on an out-of-focus plant in the corner of the room, until Jake’s hand cups your face and his thumb begins to stroke your cheekbone. When you look up at him, the smile that at some point fell from his face returns and he leans into you. His fingers slide into your hair to guide your head closer to his. 

“Jake, this isn’t trouble, is it?” you whisper before his lips can meet yours. 

He pauses. Then with his brow scrunched in confusion, he pulls back. “What do you mean?”

“This.”

A palm returns to your cheek and that thumb restarts its back-and-forth motion. “You and me?” he asks, but his head shakes before you can answer. “No, we are not trouble.”

Your chuckle lacks full commitment. A twinge of doubt in your capabilities weaseled itself into your thoughts, and though Jake is rather effective at shaking it, you can feel remnants lingering in a place he might not be able to reach. “You’re so sure,” you mutter.

 “Yes,” he says in the limited space between you. “I’m sure.”

“How?”

When Jake sighs and shifts to rest his back against the couch, you know it is not from exasperation. If you could so easily irritate him, he would have given up on anything to do with you after twenty-four hours of you living in his space. Instead, it’s a sigh of contemplation. By the look on his face, your question is one he already has an answer to for himself. His extended thought is for your sake; an extra minute taken to piece together the most encouraging explanation that will help you understand why he’s so confident.

Your hand is encased in his and he squeezes. His stare matches yours. Intense. Unwavering. “Because,” he starts, “I more than thought you were beautiful when I first saw you. I wanted you, and I have wanted you every day since—you and me, just like this, right here. But I wasn’t going to do anything unless you felt like you could trust me,” he says. “And you said you do now, right? You trust me?”

You nod. Then he nods.

“We’ve lived together for months, and I’ve been deep in it, beautiful. Nothing you can do or say will make me think anything other than what I think of you now. So you’re not trouble for me,” he says, bringing the back of your hand to his lips. “And I swear I won’t be trouble for you. If you trust me, trust that.”

Your eyes sting and your nose fills with familiar pressure. There’s something in the ease with which Jake soothes your worries that is sickeningly overwhelming. Your method of relieving pain is, as it has always been, to flee, and after spending so many years doing so, you refused to entertain any other option. But this is Jake, and Jake is different. He doesn’t do the fleeing thing. He does the “I want what I want so I will figure out how to get it” thing. And what he has wanted is your trust, which he obtained by becoming exactly what you didn’t know you needed. 

Not wanting to fall into a mess in front of him for the second time in one day, you move your legs off of Jake’s thighs despite his noise of protest and scoot your body next to his to regain some of that control. 

“What are you–” he begins with a hint of worry in his voice, but you instantly silence him with the soft “hush” that leaves your lips as you throw your leg over his hips and find your balance atop his lap. Jake’s hands settle on your waist. They snake around your back and he tugs you to his chest. The awe that swirls in his eyes as he gazes up at you fills you with confidence, and you tuck a few loose strands of hair behind your ear before gripping his shoulders. 

“I’m going to kiss you,” you say. Jake blinks, gulps, and nods, both of you knowing that each kiss between you prior to this moment was initiated by him. “I’m going to kiss you, and after that, we’re going to stop focusing on me. We’re going to stop talking about me.”

“I like talking about you,” he says. One hand slowly runs down your clothed spine, over your ass, and along your outer thigh, then makes its way back up. “Can’t we do both?”

“No.” As you lessen the distance between your lips, Jake’s neck stretches up to connect the kiss, but you maintain just enough space to keep him from succeeding. “I tell you something, you tell me something, remember?” 

With his eyes glued to your mouth, Jake nods again.

Good, you think, because step one in your determination to remain open to him is being for him who he is for you—someone to trust. “It’s your turn to tell me why you don’t like to be alone.”

The heat of a hand finds the back of your neck. Fingers weave into your hair. “I’ll tell you anything you want.”

“What I want is to know you, too.”

Jake’s inhale expels as a soft sigh. His eyes pierce yours. “It’s heavy stuff, beautiful.”

“I can handle it,” you say. Then you lean in close so your lips can ghost over his. “Trust me.”

---

tags: @wkndwlff @kmc1989 @sagittarius-flowerchild @dempy @oliviah-25 @rosiahills22 @xoxabs88xox @matisse556 @hardballoonlove @ssa-sadboi @lynnevanss @pono-pura-vida @tgmreader @amgluvsbooks @ravenhood2792 @djs8891 @shakespeareanwannabe @sailor-aviator @penguin876 @rogersbarnesxx @nani-kenobi @tgmavericklover @athenabarnes @emilyoflanternhill @wretchedmo @shanimallina87 @crowsreadsarahjmaas @mamachasesmayhem @sky2nd @eloquentdreamer @jessicab1991 @rosedurin @averyhotchner @elite4cekalyma @buckysteveloki-me @shelbycillian @kissmethric3 @fox-bee926 @hangmandruigandmav @waltermis @fandom-life-12 @a-serene-place-to-be @bruher @cehenyne @tngrace @mamaskillerqueen @emma8895eb @benedictsvestcollection @blackwidownat2814 @himbos-on-ice @entertainmentgal8 @hookslove1592 @whoeverineedtobe @alwaysclassyeagle @chaytea06 @cherrycolas-things

[impactedfates]

hello! platonic astral express (mostly welt and dan heng) + jing yuan with a teen reader like collei?

they were used as an experiment from a very young young thankfully the crew/jing yuan found and rescued them, they also took them in but they were still traumatized from their time as an experiment,they are chronically ill which makes them weak and are scared of being touched due to their time as an experiment subject

★ A/N: Colleis backstory makes me so sad :(( I love her sm. Characters here are just Dan Heng, Welt and Jing Yuan

☆ Genre/Trope: Platonic + Hurt/Comfort (kinda?)

★ Format: Mini Scenarios (Separate)

☆ Warnings: Implied torture + human experiments on reader // Scar/injuries mentions

★ Extra: Reader is shorter then characters // Reader is with the Express

Dan Heng is very careful around you, whether or not he sees himself as threatening he doesn't know if YOU'D see him as threatening. He could quickly tell how untrustworthy you were when the Express found you. And based on the scars scattered around your body, some clearly new as it seems they were inflicted on you recently and how you held up a make shift dagger towards them, you seem to have a very good reason not to trust them.

It takes some time but eventually Himeko and Welt do manage to gain your trust and let you on board so they can give you a better life then what you had experienced.

Dan Heng makes sure to always be gentle with you and helps you when you need help, he himself isn't much of a touchy person himself but he still ensures to steer clear from any touches, even the lighter ones.

He allows you in the databanks, especially when you have nightmares. He has them himself, although he isn't completely sure about what the nightmare is about, he'll never pry. Only comfort you.

He's also a bit more hesitant to show his dragon form, he doesn't want to potentially scare you but if there comes a time where he for any reason NEEDS to get into that form, he'll inform you and if you want he'll ask March or the Trailblazer to bring you away.

Overall: Dan Heng is careful around you, making sure that whatever he does doesn't trigger you in anyway - he makes sure he doesn't touch you, even slightly and comforts you if you ever have nightmares. He thinks a lot of his actions through just encase it may affect you negatively.

Welt was the first to attempt to gain your trust, his fatherly instincts kicked in as soon as he saw you, he could tell despite the face you put up to try and scare the others behind that was a scared child.

So he was patient with you, took the time to gain your trust, carefully tended to your injuries when you allowed him and as soon as you were comfortable to be on the express. He became your father, whether or not there was any paperwork done or not, you have eventually seen him as your father.

Due to his age (*cough cough* grandpa *cough cough*) he's very smart, so he takes the time to teach you, if you don't understand he'll go over it again and make sure he does it in a way that you'll understand.

He can tell that most of your childhood seems to be lost. So he attempts to make you smile, experience a good childhood you seemed to have missed.

He can also tell that your chronically ill, you're more weaker then others so he offers to get you a cane, something that can provide aid for you so it's hopefully more bearable for you, and if you ever get to weak for even that? He's more then happy to carry you, he'll always ask first as he does know you're a bit more hesitant on being held or touched in general.

If you ever have nightmares he'll make you some tea and listen to you about what it was, even if you decided to not tell him he'll keep you company.

Overall: Welt is a very patient man, who became your unofficial father, knowing that your childhood was seemingly mostly lost he tries to make up for it and he also teaches you the basics of everything. He offers a cane to hopefully help you with your more weak body.

When Jing Yuan first met you, he knew something was wrong. Whether or not you looked better then how you looked before meeting the Express, he's still a General and can catch a lot of things. He won't pry at all but when you're not around will ask about it. He's worried, a child so young and it seems like you've been hurt more then you've smiled?

He doesn't wish to pry, he knows it's none of his business but the fact he knows something bad happened to you and likely at a young age doesn't please him one bit.

Just like Welt, he's patient with you. He's also very careful around you. One time when he was supervising you he happened to summon Lightning Lord as some enemies tried to ambush you and this seemed to send you into a panic, Jing Yuan quickly made sure the enemies were gone before checking on you, being careful not to touch you but still finding a way to comfort you.

Whether or not he manages to calm you down is up to you, however you'll end up with a blanket wrapped around you in the comforts of his office. He'll give you various of games you can play, books or whatever. If you want to try a new hobby he'll get someone to get anything needed for it.

Overall: I think he's similar to Welt however he does sometimes scare you unintentionally. Whether it be due to having to summon Lighting Lord or even hearing him talk in his more "General" voice, he does feel bad though. He doesn't mean to scare you and if you're around he does try not to do either.

Sorry if this take a while to do wrjggdvg. This was slightly difficult to write as I wasn't too sure what direction to take but hopefully this is okay!

[sassy-cass-16]

Oh god I promised myself no bell’s hells meta until c3 ends but my brain is turning the “can she be trusted?” line over and over like chicken at the shawarma shop. because there are layers to that.

more under the cut because i let this run away from me:

so first off, there's the obvious: dorian initially seems to start to address the whole group, everyone who's left in the inn room, but turns and just locks eyes with orym when he asks. orym, who of everyone has the most reason to be biased against laudna right now. orym, who just got into a fight with laudna over the sword that killed both of them and orym's husband and father-in-law. that's who dorian thinks to ask, because he trusts orym not to let his judgment be clouded.

dorian first saw orym again after months of being separated, like, three days ago, and despite how much orym has visibly changed in those months, dorian doesn't hesitate to believe that orym will still be objective. he trusts that orym will be the one to look at this situation and tell him the truth.

because dorian has experience with orym telling him the truth. dorian knows firsthand how willing orym is to shuck his personal feelings in favour of what's true. dorian just saw what he could have become, had orym not stepped in to stop him taking the circlet of barbed vision. he owes the fact that he's alive and beholden to no gods to orym's willingness to be rational and objective in a situation involving a powerful magical item. by his own admission, "i wouldn't be here without you."

so of course dorian trusts him right now.

and there's something to the exclusion of the others, with that. dorian doesn't look to fearne and orym, although that would make sense because he's known the two of them the longest. he doesn't look to chetney, who's proven to be able to get a handle on this with the scream needle compromise. he doesn't look to ashton, who's been extremely levelheaded through this whole mess. he looks at orym, exclusively. he is asking orym, exclusively. not the group, although everyone decides to jump in to answer and then imogen comes through the window to complicate the matter. just orym.

dorian is the kind of person with a lot of potential for darkness in him. he hides it well because he's also deeply kind and friendly, but it's always been there. he's just been through something massively traumatic, and that was after the original circlet conflict back in exu prime. he had his alignment forcibly changed from good to neutral. but even after all he's gone though, orym's alignment is still good.

as much as orym doesn't want to be a leader and prefers to be a protector and follower, he does very well in situations where he takes on an amount of responsibility. when he's in some level of control over a situation, he takes to it naturally. he's a very good babysitter to his gaggle of weirdos. the "can she be trusted?" might have been an attempt on dorian's part to give orym a bit more control here. to reassure him that regardless of anyone else's feelings—regardless of how laudna's reaction might have affected him—orym deserves to be trusted, and he can make a decision that dorian will trust.

back in exu and all the way into early c3, dorian and orym slotted into a sort of parental position in their groups. watching over the crownkeepers' clothes when they went skinny dipping in exu. orym repeatedly steering everybody away from bad ideas. matt even described dorian leaving dariax in zephrah in 4sd as "dad just going out to get cigarettes." there's always been that underlying sense of "we are two of a pair" with dorian and orym. not to say that either of them don't see the others as adults, but they do have that rapport of being the babysitters in the gaggle of weirdos.

that kind of bond is just part of their dynamic. but especially in light of what's been happening while they were separated, and then what happened between them earlier that evening, "can she be trusted?" is a reminder of that bond. orym's been lonely, by his own admission, and one of the secrets he divulged at nana morri's was "i really miss dorian." he broke down crying during his last message through the sending stone, and then again on the bench not a few hours before this whole incident went down.

dorian came to comfort him. he flat-out said to orym's face "i'm here now." he reminded orym that he needs to rely on other people, that he can't always be the one saving everybody else. he gave orym the room to not be the strong one, and told him he has that room because dorian's there to support him. they can be two of a pair again.

he knows orym's been feeling like he can't do anything, like he had to resort to what he stopped dorian from doing with the circlet. and so dorian both gives him a choice to make, something to do, and shows him that he still trusts him unconditionally. "can she be trusted?" also means "i trust you" and "i'm here with you" and "this is how we've always been."

we know from liam in 4sd that orym has feelings for dorian that he's not sure are reciprocated. but even regardless of the romantic element here, dorian and orym have always had a partnership. they have always been two of a pair. the sequence of events leading to "can she be trusted?" is a perfect microcosm of he relationship between the two of them. it's just incredible.

[silverscence]

On Public Perceptions of the Oracle...

*Inspired by this post by @devilmancalling

I think naturally there would be people who disliked the Oracle.

It'd be less so a matter of believing — because the fact that Luna was the only one who could and did heal people from the Starscourge and did so relentlessly was undeniable — but more of a "So what?" i.e, her practical impact on people's lives, which varied significantly depending on the location.

For Insomnians, Luna’s powers might seem abstract or distant. These people had experienced the traumatic fall of their supposedly impenetrable city — losing homes, family members, and their entire way of life virtually overnight. To them, Luna was a political figure first and foremost. A Princess before an Oracle. Her marriage to their Prince represented their only hope for peace and a diplomatic solution to end the war.

When that fell through, naturally many Insomnians would feel betrayed not only by both Lucis and Niflheim, but also potentially by the entire "diplomacy" and "hope" that Luna represented. Regardless that it wasn't her fault, she would become associated with their losses. Some would inevitably view Luna as having failed in the one concrete duty she could have fulfilled to help them.

For those in occupied territories who had suffered under Imperial rule for decades, Luna’s healing might seem painfully inadequate against the daily oppression they faced. The Oracle traveled to heal victims of the Scourge, yes, but was otherwise powerless to stop the MTs patrolling their towns or the restrictions on their freedom. Her powers, while miraculous, did not address their most immediate concerns.

What makes this particularly tragic is the fact that Luna was a prisoner in her own homeland. The public image of a serene, dutiful, travelling-across-the-lands Oracle masked the reality of a woman whose every journey probably required Imperial approval and every healing was performed under the watchful eyes of her captors. This irony reached its peak when we also considered her brother's, Ravus', role. Was it also public knowledge that he was the High Commander of Niflheim? How would that knowledge contributed to the perception of Luna herself? Did it ever come to light that the beloved brother of the Oracle helped orchestrate the attack on Insomnia? Safe to assume the Chocobros certainly separate Ravus' actions from Luna, but would the public be so understanding?

On the other hand, in areas most affected by the Starscourge, Luna would be revered as we'd been shown. The dramatic, visible healing of those infected would create loyal followers who had personally witnessed or experienced her divine gifts. They would have seen her working while bearing obvious signs of exhaustion and the physical toll it took on her body. Although it is probably safe to assume that majority of people think of the Oracle favourably regardless of whether they'd seen her personally or not, as evident by the way NPCs spoke of her and the reactions towards her supposed "death" in Insomnia.

I do also think that some people would be perceptive enough to notice her "freedom" of travelling was merely an illusion crafted by the Empire. That it was all, for the Empire, a big political performance that served their propaganda, even if the Oracle's wishes to help were honest. That was perhaps the only comfort — that some would recognise her impossible situation: a divine healer held captive by an empire, forced to maintain appearances of autonomy while navigating a political labyrinth to fulfill her calling. Some would empathise, and be inspired by her determination to maintain dignity and purpose even under chains and shackles.

Luna herself was probably fully aware of these conflicting perceptions. She knew some blamed her for failures beyond her control. She knew others placed impossible expectations on her shoulders. Yet she continued her path without questions, healing those she could reach, awakening the Astrals despite the agony it caused her, and supporting Noctis from afar when she couldn’t stand beside him.

In this light, Luna’s unwavering dedication becomes even more remarkable. The Oracle continued her sacred duties not because everyone appreciated them, not because they were enough to solve all of Eos’ problems, but because they were the only things she could offer in a world where so much had been taken from her — including, perhaps, the public's full understanding of her sacrifice.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

—

Okay so, this strayed a bit from OP's post, but I started thinking about Luna's role in the movie and how the devs wanted to focus on her title as a Princess (granted they wanted to do so to keep the mysteries of the Oracle for the game) and I couldn't help but think of what Luna really, really had to go through all those 12 years. Everyone who hated her didn't understand her, but neither did everyone who revered her and put her on a pedestal. The movie, as much as I adored it to bits, could've benefited from exploring the devastating aftermath of the city's fall from the public's point of view. Or the Glaives (considering they were primarily refugees) and the Insomnian public's favour towards the Princess of former Tenebrae.

Prompto and Luna's friendship is forever my Roman Empire though, and its potential is definitely worth exploring in perhaps its own post. 🤭

[violetdisasterzone]

yet another svsss hill I'm dying on despite the apparent popular opinion — bingqiu would be great parents! give them a decade of peace and quiet to start healing from the trauma of.. everything and to get comfortable in the fact that their love and commitment to the other is reciprocated equally, and I can 100% see them wanting some little ones.

Shen Qingqiu overcame both his age AND gender to become Cang Qiong's resident milf in a matter of days after his transmigration. He's great with kids - as Shen Yuan he had a younger sister who he likely helped raise or was at least somewhat close with, he obviously loves teaching and doting on his disciples, he's immediately protective of random-abandoned-toddler!Binghe in the dream realm after escaping from the Water Prison, and obviously in the Return to Childhood extra he's (the only one) having a great time. you're telling me he WOULDN'T want a baby version of Binghe for real??

and as for Luo Binghe himself, the joke/argument I see most often is that he'd be jealous of the baby for taking his shizun's time and attention away from him. first of all, by the end of the novel, do you know how many times that man has died in his arms, pushed him away, or been separated from him in some other very traumatic ways, mostly while he was being influenced by an evil sword that amplified his worst intrusive thoughts? do you know how many people WOULD take Shen Qingqiu away, given the chance?! I think he deserves to be a bit paranoid!! but again, with a bit more distance and healing from his traumas, time, and reassurance that Shen Qingqiu really is staying, I fully believe he will mellow out in that regard. with that aside, Luo Binghe is a total mama's boy, he's a part-time emperor full-time housewife, and his greatest dream has always been to be a family with Shen Qingqiu. I don't think it's a stretch at all to imagine that someday in the future, he would want to grow that family with him too. and although we don't see him interacting with children in canon the way we do Shen Qingqiu, I cannot imagine him not loving his kids, a tangible result of their love, to pieces too.

[avonne-writes]

HS AU - If Broken Things ended differently

TW: suicide attempt and aftermath

Long post of my ramblings to @hogans-heroes below 🖤

If Gale had jumped off the bridge - and survived - he’d have been taken to a hospital first to be stabilized physically.

It would be so painful and traumatizing for Bucky to wake up like it’s a normal day, text Gale good morning and add some silly thoughts as the morning goes on but get no reply. He thinks it's strange, but figures perhaps Gale's not getting the notifications.

Bucky goes to school, waits for Gale at the place where they usually meet when they go to school separately, but Gale doesn’t show and still doesn’t answer any messages.

Bucky calls him, no reply. He asks some of his friends if they heard from Gale, all say no. Gale's last text to Bucky was a new movie trailer or something, nothing that indicates something wrong. In panic now, Bucky goes to a secluded place, doesn’t give a fuck about the class he’s skipping, and calls his mom.

Georgia can tell that something is very wrong. Bucky is hyperventilating, confused, anxious. She tries to calm him down and tells him she'll call Gale's mom.

Gale’s mom actually picks up and tells her that Gale was found by the river by someone walking their dog, that he nearly drowned and that they don’t know how he fell. They're at the hospital and waiting for him to wake up in the ICU. They don’t know if there's brain damage from hypoxia and how badly his spine is hurt.

Georgia tells Gale's mom that she and John are going to go there immediately. She takes a few calming breaths and tries to consider very carefully what she should tell Bucky.

She calls him back, he picks up instantly. Then she tells him that Gale has been in an accident and he’s in the hospital now, but his condition is stable, and that she's going to come pick Bucky up and take him there. Bucky starts crying and tries to ask her more questions but she says she doesn’t know more and that she'll be there soon, "everything will be okay, honey."

In the ICU, Gale's getting non-invasive mechanical ventilation because of the lung injury he sustained while nearly drowning. He has a neck brace and various scrapes on his body from debris carried by the river. He had hypotermia, but they have brought his temperature back to normal at this point. He wakes up by the time Bucky and Georgia get to the hospital.

Bucky struggles to stop crying all the way to the hospital. This is his worst nightmare come true, and he’s in complete shock, but there’s also a terrible dread inside him that says this wasn’t an accident.

Both of Gale's parents are at the hospital. Bucky and Georgia don't know how to act around them. Gale's dad is severely hungover and reeks, but he also seems to be in shock, and his mom is crying. The two are not comforting each other. Bucky clings to his mom's hand.

Georgia also called Neil on her way to collect Bucky, and he wanted to join them immediately but she told him it's not a good idea. He will be waiting at home.

Finally, a doctor calls them into his office to tell them what's going on. He says Gale's awake but very tired and confused, but they hope it's only temporary and that there's no brain damage. First priority is to get him to breathe on his own again. He also talks about the spinal injury, and that, again, tests are needed to see if there's any paralysis, although early signs are positive and Gale's moving his hands.

He says it's clear that Gale fell into the water from an elevated place, probably a bridge, suggesting possible suicide attempt. However... they found bruising on his face that's inconsistent with his other injuries and looks rather like a handprint from a hard slap. So, the police will be notified.

Gale's parents try to protest this actually, which confirms to Bucky that they hurt Gale, so he starts going off at them, but the doctor intervenes before it could escalate and tells everyone to calm down. He understands that this is a tense situation, but they should all focus on Gale.

Only two people at once are allowed to visit Gale in the ICU at first. He’s able to talk while on ventilation but it's difficult, and he actually doesn’t want to talk. He’s miserable and filled with shame, regret, and the wish to just disappear.

First, Gale's parents go in for a limited time - 15 min maybe - then Bucky and Georgia. Gale tries to move when Bucky comes in, but due to everything going on, he can’t do much. Bucky holds his hand, kisses it and cries, and Georgia strokes Gale's hair. Gale mumbles that he’s sorry.

Naturally, Bucky wants to stay with him overnight. There’s no way he’s letting Gale out of his sight again or leaving him with only his parents. But it's not a good idea, it’s better if he gets some rest, it helps Gale rest too. Gale's mom stays with Gale, everyone else goes home (Bucky has to be dragged away basically).

Once home, Bucky can’t sleep. His mind can’t stop spinning, going over everything that happened, how it's all his fault. Georgia holds him on the couch and she and Neil try to comfort him. For the first time since Bucky's dad left, Bucky ends up sleeping in his mom's bed because he’s so distressed. Neil sleeps in the guest room.

Gale's moved to a normal hospital unit the next day - and he’s on suicide watch. As soon as he’s physically healthy enough, he’s moved to a mental health ward.

Meanwhile, child protection services knock on the Clevens' door. Gale is very close to being 18, so by the time the legal process gets anywhere, he’s already an adult.

I think he’s discharged from the psych ward not long before Christmas. He’s still wearing a spine brace, but he’s getting better. I think an agreement is reached with Gale's parents, so he moves in with Bucky and Georgia instead of going home.

I think Gale's near-drowning and the investigation might actually prompt Gale's mom to divorce Gale's dad in this version of the AU. She's never going to be mother of the year, but maybe he and Gale can build a better relationship in the future.

There's a long recovery ahead of Gale, especially mentally, but Bucky is there to support him all along, even though his own issues are triggered too.

This is how I imagine the story would go if Gale had decided to jump that night on the bridge.

[gatitties]

Hi can you do yandere bonten (separately where their s/o (who knows they’re a yandere and gose a long with.) is being targeted by another gang. ( Trying to kill them and shit) and on day they see a red dot on their s/o forehead. (Coming from a laser on a gun) and then there’s gunshots everywhere. Do they manage to tackle their s/o on those and save them? ( you can pick) and what do they do to rival gang when they find them?

─Yandere!Bonten x reader (separately)

─Summary: a moment in which your life is threatened, a moment of despair for these boys

─Warnings: death, blood, mention of drugs, toxic behaivors, yandere stuff

─ It was very strange to go from not being noticed socially to having a psychopath holding your waist every second of your existence.

─ You knew that his behaviors went beyond a toxic and controlling partner, perhaps because you were aware that you knew how to cope with it in a certain way, in any case accepting his madness made many things easier, it was better to be on Mikey's good side.

─ That you were docile could only improve Mikey's condition, although sometimes it was like dealing with a capricious child, you had to at least pretend not to be uncomfortable twenty-four hours a day stuck to him in any way.

─ Although there are situations in which due to certain circumstances he needs to move away from you, it will bother him even if it is a few seconds in which he has to greet someone important, but he will always have a part of his body attached to you, whether it's his hand on your shoulder or his knee touching yours, he needs to make sure that you won't vanish out of nowhere even though it's physically impossible.

─ In the event that your life was threatened for just a measly second, it was like starting a war.

─ You didn't even know what happened before his body locked you against the floor and dragged you under one of the tables.

─ You were at a dinner with some executives and out of nowhere you found yourself being suffocated by Mikey on the floor listening to a lot of guns and screams.

─ He knew that he had enemies around every corner, but he didn't know that they were stupid enough to point a gun directly at you, at his most precious being.

─ You were lucky that he was able to react in time due to his constant fixation on always having you by his side, if it weren't for his mania perhaps your destiny would have been different.

─ Although unfortunately this event reduced your time outdoors, at least until Mikey wiped out each and every one of those involved in your near-death.

─ It wasn't a good start because it started with your kidnapping.

─ But perhaps the effect of narcotics on your body was what made you stop fighting against someone who had more power than you in society, you were condemned and you accepted it.

─ Sanzu doesn't care enough not to traumatize you and you have to get used to the fact that every time he takes you somewhere someone ends up dead because of him.

─ He doesn't require so much continuous physical contact, however whenever he wants it you will have to be on his lap without any complaints, you learned the hard way that it was better to listen the first time he wants something.

─ You're his little toy and everyone knows it, maybe, too many people know who you 'belong' to and that caught the attention of a certain gang that Sanzu had previously had problems with.

─ That's why the moment when you find yourself in a brothel having a drink with Sanzu and the Haitani brothers and a red dot forms on your forehead is not surprising to him.

─ It was the lack of reaction, the mental block and the speed with which the murder happened, it was a clean shot, your blood splashed on his stupefied face and he couldn't even catch your body before you collapsed against the elegant sofa.

─ It broke him, not the fact of your death, but the fact that another person had played with the life of his obsession, his new toy, and maybe he didn't accept so easily that you were dead, maybe he kept your inert body in his bed, your pajamas on as if it were just another ordinary night.

─ To say he was a disaster (even more) was an understatement, he was going to find those bastards and going to torture them while 'you' watched, hoping that it would entertain you, at least this time you would look and not look away like all those other times.

─ He's probably one of the most normal, if it's normal to be harassed for months and have 'unintentional' encounters with Kakucho all the time.

─ Kakucho was more of an observer and stayed in the background, he knew that his obsession was not a good thing, but at least he accepted that he was aware of it and that you would have to accept him.

─ No matter how much you ran away, what you did, you always had his eyes on your figure, you were a kind of divinity for him and he didn't even want to do anything perverse, he wanted to love you. Was he asking for much? Well, he could always resort to other methods anyway, if he wanted something, he had the power to get it.

─ He didn't ask for much, he just wanted you, and he became so sincere as to confess to you everything he had been doing, everything he would do if you agreed to be with him by hook and by crook.

─ He's not very good with romantic relationships if his last option is a threat, but you decided to take the easy way out and accept all his madness towards you.

─ He was too paranoid to let you go out on your own, to do anything without his supervision, he had lost Izana a long time ago and it was too painful and traumatic for him to happen to you.

─ It's quite rare that your life is threatened because you practically don't leave your safe place, but like any good gentleman, he always has some romantic plan for two and that means going out from time to time.

─ Don't worry, the second that red dot is on your forehead you were probably protected by a mass of muscles from several bodyguards and immediately guided out along with Kakucho.

─ He will not personally be in charge of finding and killing the gang that was behind the attempt on your life, but he will know when they are all three meters underground, which will be sooner rather than later.

─ Oh poor thing, did you really think you could escape his clutches once he met you and became infatuated with you? That's sweet of you, but Takeomi already has you under the palm of his hand without you knowing it.

─ You noticed each of his manipulation tricks and his strange fixation on you, he laughed knowing how perceptive you were and admitted to you that he had not been able to get you out of his mind since the first time he saw you and that it would be better if you accompanied him for the good ones.

─ He was good enough that you could face him and move forward despite all his toxic behaviors, and even though you missed your old life and freedom, you bitterly accepted that it wasn't that easy to get rid of a mafia executive.

─ He showered you with luxuries and praise whenever you behaved as he wanted, and he tried to make everything as least uncomfortable as possible since he was hungry for love, but he knew that forcing some things on you would make him feel as if everything was a lie (despite that it was in a certain way, he wouldn't admit it).

─ He thought that no one would be stupid enough to even think about hurting you, you were always well protected and a few threats would be enough to stop anyone from wanting to look at you.

─ Poor little gang that tried to annoy him by threatening you at gunpoint, Takeomi is not stupid and expected your life to be threatened sooner or later, he is not a saint and has enemies left and right, this devil knows more because he is old than by devil

─ The whole band died that night while he was enjoying his dinner with you without any altercation, you didn't even know and you didn't need to know, he wanted to continue in his bubble of happiness and a trauma to you would break that illusion, you were behaving so well, you didn't need to feel fear, at least not fear from other people.

─ You were smart and applied, probably what caught Kokonoi's attention, it started as a small crush that got worse when he saw how your attention was not only for him.

─ You were smart, but not smart enough to notice how he drugged you to kidnap you that night he invited you to dinner. If you didn't notice his obsessive behavior before, now you did.

─ The amount of luxuries and whims increased, you didn't even need to behave well, he would have you with money as he had always done with everything, and you had no choice but to accept that a crazy rich man had kidnapped you and that he wouldn't let you go unless you were his partner or something like that.

─ Sick, yes, but you didn't want to know what would happen if you refused, or maybe it was Stockholm syndrome, at this point you no longer knew how to differentiate it.

─ Kokonoi is not always with you, which gives you a false sense of freedom, false because you always have a bodyguard watching from afar, and although you don't know it, there are more eyes watching you.

─ Kokonoi is not stupid either, he knows that they will use you to get to him, but he anticipated the facts, he managed to bribe the murderer of the gang who had problems with him to make sure that you would be fine, he would break if he lost another important person.

─ Astute enough to foresee a possible murder but not enough to foresee a betrayal, his whole world collapsed when one night he found out that you had been murdered, that was not supposed to happen, he should have been there.

─ He faced your death with vengeance, despite not being the most bloodthirsty in Bonten, the only thing he wanted to do was torture the gang that had dared to take your life, that scum that decided to betray him, he would not be the one to apply violence, but he would enjoy the cries of those bastards.

─ You were a whim of the younger brother of the Haitani, a whim that he couldn't get out of his head.

─ It started out as a normal relationship, but his delusional obsession with you and his changes in behavior made you think that everything was much more complicated than a mere relationship.

─ Rindou watched every step you took, he started getting rid of 'unnecessary' people in your life and you couldn't do anything about that, you accepted it too easily, so much so that you even thought you weren't completely sane.

─ You didn't need anyone else, he is always there, literally always because he loves to be by your side, he loves to squeeze your waist and bring you closer to him while others see him, he loves to kiss you in front of everyone to make it clear that he is the one who has you and no one else.

─ He can be suffocating at times, but it's not like you can do anything, if necessary he will chain you to him to stay together until death.

─ Speaking of death… the threats don't take long to arrive, knowing that they could use you against him, he will not leave you alone even to go to the bathroom, anything can be a threat, even an innocent child could be a spy looking to kill you.

─ Locking you up and depriving you of going outside doesn't make it any less likely that you'll end up dead, even though he didn't leave you for even a second, he wasn't fast enough to throw you to the ground when the red dot on your temple became visible.

─ He saw how your gaze was lost until it was lifeless and he saw red, all the people who were close to the scene died in painful ways in the following week, whether they were innocent or those involved, Rindou needed someone to pay for his loss, maybe he wasn't cautious enough.

─ You fell for his sweet charms, charms that had a lot of corpses, blood and torture behind them, but it was all for you, why would you get angry? He thought he wasn't doing anything wrong and would make you think so too, Ran is very patient.

─ Whatever it was, you accepted all of his macabre behavior, the murders, the jealousy, the obsession, you had to put up with everything.

─ But it's okay, Ran will be generous, he will offer you a lot for little, he just wants you to pay attention to him, he needs to know that you will be there for him no matter what he does.

─ He doesn't always have time for you unfortunately, but he will always have an eye on you, he needs to make sure that no one, not even you, does anything stupid when he's not there.

─ He treats you as if you couldn't do anything on your own, as if you were weaker than him, he likes you to be like the typical character in trouble, it makes him look cooler, doesn't it?

─ He probably received some threat, he could only laugh at the band that thought could touch a single lock of your hair.

─ The problem is that your restrictions increased and your 'free' time decreased, typical, but in this case Ran will be much more paranoid, don't think about spending a single moment alone from now on until he investigates and kills all those cockroaches who dared to threaten your life.

─ The moment he sees that the shooting starts in one of his brothels when he is spending time with you he gets furious, he will get you to safety immediately, he locks you up and even gives you a gun in case some smartass find you.

─ He will personally take charge, with some help from his brother, of killing the gang that had started the destruction in his business right there and will return to you to calm you down with a session of kisses and hugs if you get scared.

─ Poor Mochizuki was never good at romance, he didn't have many partners and his position in one of the biggest mafias in Tokyo was not a positive incentive to find someone who loved him.

─ So he thought that his obsession was justified when you showed some interest in him, of course that was before you knew who he really was, but it was too late, he got his hopes up and he wouldn't let anyone break them, not even yourself.

─ If he needed to have you drugged for you to accept him, he would do it, but no one would take away what he had longed dreamed for so long.

─ Don't let his tough exterior fool you, he could be a total idiot just for you, although he didn't always use the most legitimate means to get something you wanted, you couldn't do much either.

─ He always keeps you in a close hug, squeezing your shoulder and holding your body close to his as if they were going to steal you from his hands.

─ It's impossible for him not to worry, he knows the world he moves in and he is the weakest link among the Bonten executives, the guy who is in charge of some of the dirty work and knows that he has many guns pointed at him.

─ That's why he couldn't help but get involved in a shootout when he was trying to enjoy a night walk with you, he was incredibly quick to get you out of the way of the bullet that was aimed at your head, but he didn't expect for another one to embed itself in your lung seconds later.

─ His whole world shattered because he thought he had been able to save you, but seeing you dying in pain while he tried to take you to the nearest hospital was something worse than death for him, especially because you didn't make it.

─ It's not a surprise that the day after mourning that entire band was brutally murdered with just his fists, the sound of bones breaking under his knuckles was music to his ears that day.

[bowsergotdunked]

ROTTMNT AU: STREET SMARTS!

so, i wanna start off by saying a HUGE thank you to the people who gave their time and effort to this au: @autumnmoon15 , @songdrop and @purplecaffeinecat ! autumnmoon helped massively with the boys designs along with designing Raph, songdrop gave me anatomy tips and purplecaffeinecat gave feedback on the story!! INCREDIBLY HUGE THANKS, I LOVE YOU PEOPLE!!! >X3 🩵🩵🩵

on with the yapping!! જ⁀➴

╰┈➤ˎˊ˗ MAIN STORY

this AU is a take on the separated au trope! in this one, the boys are mutated by draxum and raised by him up until their early teens, but unfortunately get separated when an accident happens.

now without the guidance of any parental figure and scarred, the boys have to navigate life in the hidden city as the mystic menaces!

╰┈➤ˎˊ˗ CHARACTER BIOS

(i'll add the design ref sheets when i draw them and clean this up for a masterpost eventually lol)

── .✦ Raph!

unable to fullfil his role as leader due to an injury, so he took on the role of teaching his brothers how to fight (with some help from Donnie),

only leaves the lair when absolutely necessary (usually to kick ass),

reserved, but still friendly when desired,

pseudo-leader,

basically 2k12!Splinter but harsher & more stressed,

mask inspiration: Shīsā

── .✦ Mikey!

the same as he is in-canon, although way more energetic and clingy (especially with Raph), likes to move around like a monkey,

leaves the lair basically all the time, whether it be with Donnie & Leo, or by himself

the most social out of the 4, has a lot of friends in the hidden city and a few on the surface,

powerhouse, usually the one running mystic powers training for everyone,

literally just mikey,

mask inspiration: Kitsune

── .✦ Donnie!

still the tech guy, experiments a lot with mystic energy, does research on mystic powers,

always in his lab, unless he has a reason to leave,

anti-social, prefers spending time with his brothers & April

brains + a bit of brawn, second in command,

personality of 2k12!Raph combined with rise!Donnie,

mask inspiration: Oni

── .✦ Leo!

this bad boy can fit SO much trauma in him, cockiest bastard in the hidden city,

leaves the lair often, likes to go watch the battle nexus,

likes socializing, but makes more enemies than friends,

leader, face man, professional boyfailure & team medic,

rise!Leo turned up to 11 with a villainous edge (aka the other type of edgy to not cope with trauma),

mask inspiration: Oni

── .✦ April!

same as in-canon, a bit more jaded due to her history with the guys, big sis 24/7,

visits the lair any time she can,

socializes a lot to gather intel in case the guys need it,

unofficial 5th member of the mystic menaces,

basically rise!April still,

mask inspiration: TBA

── .✦ Draxum & Splinter!

unaccounted for just yet >:3

╰┈➤ˎˊ˗ EXTRA!

originally i wanted to make this au solely because i wanted to traumatize leo the least but well here we are where he is the main character yet again oops

i will make a fanfic for this at some point along with maybe a few comics, but that'll be way in the future, so i humbly ask for your patience. if you wanna see any kinds of updates, tho, you can follow my bluesky! i post wips there sometimes :33

THANK YOU FOR READING!!! X]]

[lullabyalikpoptarot]

TXT's Tea Session

Dislaimer: No facts, all alleged, just my interpretation of the cards and messages.

Alright, time for the next tea session. Time for to get to my other favorites. I feel they got some tea, so let's see what they are willing to share. I feel this group always shares some fascinating insights.

Yeonjun

I see him very protective of his career and assets. He can be selfish in that way. He always looks to expand his career. I can see him being open to sexual favors if that gets him where he need to be and expand globally. It may have been with an older female, as the clarifier was the Empress, hopefully he didn't get a chick pregnant, but it can also mean to be able to create he had to sleep with this person. He does feel caged and very in control. He may not liked to be tamed as he is.

He is showing they are infantilized and coddled a bit too much. They can't really mature in some ways. And that the higher ups don't want them to outgrow them and prosper too much. He is showing me that there is competitive energy between the members, maybe they are out up against one another. He is showing some sort of rituals they may do, but he isn't elaborating on this. Pulled more cards, it is something that helps them gain success, so maybe doing rituals and spells to help with their success. Nothing new there, been getting that.

I wanted a clarifier for the 5 of wands. He seems to actually not like the drama or competitive energy around the group. Although, he may care about success and his money. He does want less drama and for all to get along and be more loving towards another. He rather distance himself from that and would rather separate himself from it. He might also feel it isn't good for their careers to have all this drama and fighting. He wants them to stand as a united front and be a loving family, so whatever disagreements the other members may have, and I do see that. He separates himself from that noise and isolates himself, until things get resolved. He wants no part of it. He wants them to be emotionally connected. Not going to lie, thought he was a bit cold, and about his career, but he genuinely seems to want them all to get along.

Hmm, it took a while to get something out of him. He doesn't open up so easily, but got some tea, as I would expect.

Soobin

I can see him being emotionally turbulent, maybe got offered some drink that cultivate that. He isn't very stable, and emotions can get the best of him. He seems to run on his emotions. He struggles to stay balanced. I don't see him being very grounded. I see a female energy being problematic for him. I do sense he has been traumatized. He could have dealt with some sort of abuse. It is hard for him to stand strong through it all. He seems to have his guard up and tries to protect himself.

There could be some contracts or deal he foolishly signed into, no surprised there. I don't think he was aware of what he signed into. I just think he didn't know all it takes to get to the pinnacle of success. Backstabbing, lies and deceit and a sense of imbalance. I believe it is hard for him to manage it all. He kind of struggles to balance all the responsibilities of it all. He had a naive approach to it all.

Wanted more card for this Empress and got some not-so-great cards she is a problem in his life. She causes chaos and turmoil for him, makes his life a living hell. I am not sure if this is his Mom, or a mother figure in the company. But the Hierophant card showed up, so she can be part of the company. I see her having a strong desire to see them succeed, but she can be too much and overbearing and quite problematic. She may even confuse him and could say hurtful things to him, or maybe he said something to her. She makes it hard for him to reach new levels and maybe even find peace of mind. She may be part of the reason he is messed up and emotionally all over the place.

Beomgyu

He seems determined to get what he wants. He is a passionate individual and there may be something he wants or may fight for. I can also see him not really being about the money, more so the creative pursuit. He may want things to be more creative, rather than it be about how to make money or focusing on those aspects.

He seems to go through these modes of being emotionally numb, bored with things, distant and then he can be very self-indulgent. But I can also see him not taking those drinks they may offer and decline those things. He does seem to find a way to dissociate and disconnect from time to time. Like he may not want to face reality at times. He could drink (alcoholic beverages) to numb himself. Or there is some escape mechanism he used to avoid the reality.

He seems to try to balance all aspects of himself and tries not to lean to far into one end of the spectrum. He tries to be rational, logical and smart about things, but can also be very in the clouds, imaginative and idealistic about things. I see him clashing with others, maybe a war of words, due to his desire to be more creative and wanting more creative projects. He is pretty stubborn and I see him having no problem expressing his grievances and disappointments to the higher ups. I just keep seeing that he wants more creative pursuits and there is a disagreement on that and he is at odds with others, due to that. He isn't showing me anything new here. I have seen this in his energy for a while.

I don't see Beomgyu as someone with dark secrets or anything. Although, he does show off a timid and shy appearance. He seems pretty vocal and demanding about his grievances and seems to not keep quiet about that behind the scenes.

Taehyun

Seeing some discrepancy with him and others, possibly the members. He is at odds with others. This could do with an attraction, he may have an attraction to someone, could be a member, yup saying it. This is a tea session. Not going lie, could be Kai. He ends this spread with cups, which is about emotions. This is how I see this.

He may feel betrayed and backstabbed right now. He could be depressed. He seems a bit distant now, possibly avoidant, maybe trying to avoid his own emotions. So, it does seem he is focusing his energy on work and trying to do things to keep his mind off of things. I see him doing his best to escape his feeling, but also just reflecting and spending time to himself.

This 5 of Wands keeps showing itself with this group, definitely drama surrounds them and the members. I see manipulation, backstabbing with him, is it him or others, not sure. I am also seeing, and I saw this with his reading with Soobin. He may have did some sly shit to him, to knock him down, out of jealousy and competitiveness. I needed more cards, because this is interesting, so I got the Emperor, this always gives me check mate, a need to one up someone, so he may have felt the need to do that, and then I got, 5 of Pentacles and 9 of Cups, a need to take someone out to get what he wants.

Need more card, because he is bringing the tea! I got the 7 of wands rv and the 6 of cups and got boundaries being crossed in the past, had no clue wtf that means, so pulled more cards, and got the 3 of cups, strongly feel this is himself, Soobin and Kai, there is something about work and moving forward or a difficulty to do so, I wish I can get more information, ugh, I want all the details, but can't get it. I will pull two more and that is it! He gave me the 3 of wands, 3 again! And Empress, creative energy. Okay, this is simpler than I thought, it is a struggle for them to tap into their emotions, because of that they can't nurture the bond they have and move forward. It is just stagnant, also a need for them to be more compassionate and understanding of another. Okay, I am done officially.

Wait, another thing that came up while reading this back. Just with them there is a lot of combative and aggression energy and not enough emotions and compassion with these guys, which creates this turmoil. They are just not in touch with their emotions, which causes all these problems. They are all, mainly the 3 I discussed, have not done the healing work yet to move forward in a positive direction.

Huening Kai

He is showing a disagreement, being at odds, this could be with Tae or Soobin, since this is the exact same thing that came up in Tae's reading or the people within the company. These next cards make no sense to me. Ace of Swords, sharing some information. 10 of Wands, heavy burdens, carrying a lot of the weight and 3 of cups, rituals, magic spells. But that can also be the 3 members I been mentioning. Pulled more cards and still makes no sense, the Star card is also about sending something out to the universe. There is a plan for him to make some sort of change.

He might want to leave the company, maybe he told Tae about this and that upset him, but he may want them to join him. I see him wanting to go against the company head, maybe seek Justice. He wants to utilize his talents elsewhere. He may not think it is utilized there. He may be tired of making money for this person, he seems to think he is a lazy bumb and they do all the work, which is why he wants to dip, maybe so he can make money on his own terms and for himself. I see him wanting to expand even further than he is. He may feel the company holds him back.

He seems to want to take control of his life and may have a plan. He feels trapped and limited, a bit suffocated. It seems he is starting to follow his heart and intuition and letting that lead him. He also sees things clearly and has observed things he may have not liked. I also see him wanted to make money for himself and take control of his own money and assets. He is tired off the stress and the mental games they may play with them, the back and forth. Yeah, he wants equal distribution of money, the work he puts in he should be paid for and it seem he feels he doesn't. He may talk to the other members, I feel mainly Tae and Soobin about going after the company together and demand what they want or leave together. But they may not completely side with him there. He wants to shine, but he may feel he is being stifled.

Alright, I spent way too much time with this one, but this group was the most fascinating, which I was expecting to be honest. The more I read for them. The more interesting they are to me. But I will stop here.