#although i shouldn't have some of these
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*on the floor trembling through gritted teeth* this made me grow as a person. this made me change for the better. good things have come out of this.
#all this bullshit changed me a lot in ways i'd argue were necessary#i learned i shouldn't take what i see in online leftist spaces as gospel and that i should stand by my own stances#i learned i can't rely on the internet to keep me company and that having friends and doing things irl is more fulfilling#i got in touch with my people and my culture as opposed to how passive i was about my jewishness before#i discovered my passion for sociology and psychology (and decided to major in sociology in hs because of it)#did i mature and grow a lot? yes. did this change my life for the better in some ways? yes.#but was it worth going through all this shit and losing pretty much all of my previous comfort? HELL NO#and ofc it's not worth this horrible war either. nothing is.#i feel bad but i'm trying to focus on the good things that have come out of it and telling myself it was necessary i come to these changes#(ALTHOUGH IT WOULD HAVE BEEN VERY NICE IF IT WAS UNDER DIFFERENT CIRCUMSTANCES)#because it's what keeps me sane#hila has spoken
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y'know how a lot of folks adopted dogs during covid lockdowns
and then when things started opening up again, a lot of those dogs were poorly-trained wrecks being left home alone for the first time
i feel like that, except about my D&D group
#we used to play every week#now we play maybe once a month#although we still schedule to play every week#there are just endless last-minute cancellations#and some of them like#you can't do anything about#like 'the baby was super fussy last night and we're too tired'#like i shouldn't be mad about having to cancel for something out of their control#.......... but i'm still pretty bummed and annoyed#y'know?
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@theosconfessions
Jake: I'm so glad you decided to stay the weekend
Isaac: It's New Years Eve. It's time to try new things.
Jake: Oh I know a few things for you to try.
Jake: (explaining all the 'new' things he could teach him)
Isaac: I kind of thought spending a weekend with a guy was new enough.
Jake: oh yeah...that was hot!!!
#isaac reagan#jake kline#ts4#gameplay#wondering if this needs a title#jake's adventures#or jake and his boys#although you haven't met his other boy#he seems to have a bit more theo in him then we all realized#there are some mistakes i'm finding now as I added the transcript to the post#I shouldn't have done this so early in the morning#but i don't feel like changing it so you get the errors too
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weeeeeee
#my posts#your local library probably has a decent cd collection!#i dropped by mine after work today and found some gems#and put some others on hold#there are probably audiobooks too but i didnt look through. although do audiobooks even come out on cd anymore?#or is it all apps and streaming these days#favourites i picked up: transatlanticism which you can see here#whats your pleasure by jessie ware. visions of a life by wolf alice#i also got a few i haven't listened to yet like why hasnt everything already disappeared by deerhunter#and for ones i put on hold... angles by the strokes and sloan's action pact(!)#and spiritbox's fear of fear ep which i was surprised to see. although i shouldn't be since they're a canadian band#no carly rae though :( which is fine bcs i already have most of her albums. but#also no mcr which really surprised me since most of their albums came out when CDs were big + they're well known#maybe a deliberate omission...?
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i've once again neglected my joyceposting
#it's hard when you love the character - like joyce is one of my very favorites#(at least the s1 and 2 version of her is)#but the majority of content for them is ship-related#this isn't SUCH a problem with lucas to me bc i love lumax although it's also not great there bc it usually casts lucas as support only#anyway.... joyce byers am i right?#Character of all time#when someone thought i shouldn't have put a post in her tag bc it was like “she in some ways failed jonathan”#as if that isn't the most compelling thing??#as if they couldn't have milked that for all it's worth??#as if she isn't held together with nothing but cigarettes and duct tape and that’s inevitably going to have a cost??#as if it doesn't make her an EXCELLENT character?#emspeak
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Currently putting the blorbos in their respective chaws, but the devil tempts me into making Shizuku a member of the navigation chaw
#it's actually quite fun to figure out the chaws since a group shouldn't have owls in the same chaw#the dynamics yk? like Minoshihokoha in colliering is my finest idea#prsk gog au#zondesrambles#although I have to consider that some of the blorbos aren't part of Ga'hoole yet for example Niigo has to originate from elsewhere...
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I'm not really a fan of Hawks losing his Quirk to AfO. If it serves any purpose it will probably be used to help Izuku fight AfO in the vestige realm which is a fight I was never looking forward to in the first place. Otherwise I don't think it really serves much purpose for Hawks as a character because we're at the end of the story and we just won't get a big focus on how it effects him going forward.
I mean, I see people saying that him losing his Quirk has set him free from the HPSC but he was essentially free from them after the first War. They have been non-existent in the story since than besides passing mentions. From what the reports said last chapter it seems that all the Heroes fighting are doing so of their own pure desire to help, not because the HPSC is paying them or anything. Keigo isn't working for them and given the world ending stakes if he wanted to do anything but beat AfO it'd be a negative trait, not him finding his freedom.
I know people want Keigo to find himself outside of being a Hero and his Quirk but that doesn't really seem to be a theme in the story. If Hori wanted to tell that story he could have done so with Mirio or All Might but he didn't. Instead Mirio was given his Quirk back with little fan fair and All Might's inspiration and Hero heart was reinforced. The story is about people being Heroes not about themselves as just people.
Which is honestly how I see things going with Hawks. His Quirk will be a force for good that helps Izuku beat AfO from the inside proving that despite his saying his Quirk was dirty, he really did/does have the heart of a Hero.
Also, I do think it takes real Hawks out of the story most likely, which is a bit disappointing, though understandable. I never really understood where people got the idea he was going to have a full mental break down anyway and besides him flipping out because he can't help anymore I still don't really see it happening. I mean, Hori is going at light speed here, why would he take the time to focus on Hawks having a mental break when he hasn't even managed to do that for his main three villains yet, who actually need that for the story to end.
I could easily be proven wrong given that Hori's writing is unpredictable, but for the moment my guess is that Hori did this so he could take Hawks out of the fight so he wouldn't get involved with the Todoroki or Ochako/Toga stuff, while also leaving open the possibility to give Izuku a strong ally in Hawks Quirk if needed.
I know people wanted him in those fights, but Hori has a hard time juggling characters in fight scenes, something we've seen a lot in this arc and the one prior. And to be honest he doesn't serve much purpose in them either. I've seen theories of wanting him try and kill Dabi and being devastated because Enji saves his son, essentially picking Touya over him, but Hawks has been nothing but positive about Enji trying to change and help his family. He didn't try and attack Touya or even mention him when he came through the portal, so don't know why he'd suddenly decide to attack him Quirk or not.
When it comes to Toga/Ochako thing he only complicates it. Yes, he killed Twice, but as we've seen Toga's main problem isn't that Twice was killed, it's that Izuku and Ochako, kids around her age don't like her. She feels like no one cares about her because she has a bad Quirk. If getting revenge for Twice was her main objective than she wouldn't have been crying. She doesn't even think about Hawks or name dropped him to my knowledge. If anything she treats all Heroes as guilty. To add Hawks into this fight draws attention away from Ochako, Toga and her main issue of identity. Plus, again I don't see Hawks being upset if Ochako saves Toga in the way he couldn't save Twice. He liked Twice and did try to save him. At most I think we'd see him watching with a happy smile and some tears, not having a full existential crisis.
#bnha spoilers#bnha 385#bnha Hawks#keigo tamaki#i admit I'm bias in this because the idea that Hawks having to lose his wings to find himself feels a bit gross#like Quirks are shown to be a big part of a person#and he is essentially losing body parts#why can't he just get to enjoy his Quirk outside of being in the HPSC?#it's like if you let a bird out of it's cage but them ripped off it's wings#that's not really any better#and I also don't really want him to have some crisis either#the one caused by Enji makes no sense given he praises Enji for trying to fix things with his family#so idk why he'd suddenly be shocked that Enji wouldn't want his son dead#and although it'd make more sense with the Toga/Twice stuff#I still don't see why it'd end up with him having a mind break#crying tears of joy sure#admitting to Toga he shouldn't have killed Twice maybe#getting a full on mental break down where he screams and cries because he's realized he was the biggest bad#I don't really see#again part of that is bias because Hori made the stakes to high and his villains to eager to murder all of Japan#that it's hard to see Hawks as fully wrong for killing Twice#but also i don't see Hori spending the pages when he already has so much to wrap up#and a lot of those are way more pressing than Hawks having a midlife crisis
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I like how the first thing u see on my blog is big bold letters telling minors not to follow me but in the last 2 days I've has 2 minors follow me and one of them was a t//erf
#LIKE CMON NOW.....#although on second thought maybe I shouldn't have blocked the t//erf bc maybe being exposed to some trans ppl would do her good lmao
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<<DNI if you shame people for having "cringe" interests>> *proceeds to shame or disrespect someone for having interest in fictional stuff they don't like instead of using the block button even though that person has done anything to anyone*
#vent??? I guess??? idk#some people is mind-blowing to me. not in the good sense#idc much about fandom discourse or whatever but the level of blindness or hypocrisy some reach is??#like you see them telling everyone they are supportive and reality ≠ fiction but then make gymnastic levels of stretching to explain why--#--what they like is good 👍 and everything they dislike or they're neutral of shouldn't exist and who enjoy it should kill themselves#and it doesn't even need to be something gross like this time I have seen it is because others like Kuromi more than My Melody dude wtf? 😭#guys is it homophobic to be cishet? Because apparently according to some who support everyone of the collective being cishet is enough to--#get blocked. If it was reversed they would get called out for their weird behaviour but ig I'm the weird one#like. One thing is blocking or putting boundaries because that's what social media is for. Curating your space is normal and it should--#always be#but another thing is opinating [insert sexuality/gender] is 'on thin ice' for just...being on the internet???#Idk what I was expecting from Twitter tbh. Although I see people like that in every social media#so sad and tiring#just say you don't want others to have different takes in whatever fandom you are and go. You don't need to give explanations or aact-#--like you are always objective and therefore correct#Anyway in this house we stan Kuromi and cishet people as long as they don't discriminate anyone for their gender identity or sexuality 👍#If you have read this far I'm sorry. Seems long. Have a nice day 🫶#and if you are wondering no that person didn't do anything to me they were talking about Kuromi/straights in general#but I felt the need to share#tw vent#edit: Seems like they did reach somebody over their interest in fandom stuff. Not surprises there#God forbid people to make their internet experience about their hobbies and interests#instead of curating THEIR OWN BLOG and thinking of what others want them to like instead#just a warning for those who like my shit. Unfortunately for you I like fictional characters being evil or morally grey as much as#fictional characters being good people#sorry guys block me if you want Imma keep using critical thinking 🤷♂️#OH AND WHAT UPSETS ME THE MOST: When somebody breaks their own dni to go to somebody to tell them they suck or whatever#like????? Why would you do that if you despise x trope or thing sm???? So you want everyone to respect your boundaries except yourself????#you just waste your own time and those you interact with by trying to create a raging conversation for all parts#fandom discourse
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K.enzo T.enma my absolute beloved-
I promise this will be the one and only time I talk about N.aoki U.rusawa's M.onster!! I just need to talk about T.enma real quick because I have brainrot! Man, he really is just such a kind man and the way his kindness leaves an impact to those around him is just so good-
#Pan rambles#I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD CLARIFY I DON'T SHIP WITH HIM OR ANYTHING#He's just a character that's very special to me#Kinda like how S.ora from K.ingdom H.earts is very dear and important to me#T.enma is like that character I saw when I was younger and always inspired me-#(although I will say that I probably shouldn't have watched the anime when I did. I was pretty young and some things went over my head-)#I didn't want to be in his shoes because I definitely don't wanna deal with all the stuff he goes through in the series-#But I did want to be kind like he was and leave a positive impact to those around me-#A close friend of mine whom I introduced to Monster mentioned that she can see the influence and I was all gksnfkdnfkdkf#but yeah#ahem#My apologies! back to my regular self ship content now!
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he's going to be fighting a bunch of these things on his own, huh?
#wednesday spoilers#I don't think anyone really likes the im2-ish plot regarding h*ward but then duggan did warn us that he wanted to expand on whatever#happened in hickman's shield run so that's a thing that's happening now I guess.... I just hope he wraps it up quickly#emma was pretty annoying in this issue imo like idk if she's genuinely underestimating feilong or just not letting some things on due to#her being on the council etc. but it's probably going to backfire badly. I liked that tony & sunfire interacted though it's been a while I#think. I don't really know what to say about the h*ward stuff except that I liked that tony didn't become emotional or lose his head when#he was mentioned & he also didn't say anything nice about him so that's fine I guess...#I like that while he won pretty easily in the last issue the sentinel is clearly extremely powerful & tony was outgunned & retreated and I#like that there was no mention of his ego or whatever even though having to run would mess with anyone's ego a bit. I'm sure he would've#fought it anyway if it endangered anyone else but since it didn't he didn't fight a losing battle for whatever reason which shouldn't be#surprising but considering the quality of a lot of his previous runs it's nice#this issue wasn't as strong as the last one imo & I wish the stark employees resigned in protest the way they always did in the past#although it hasn't been his company for a while & usually when they resigned it was about tony and that one dude was clearly unhappy about#what was happening so maybe we'll see something in later issues? idk#I could've used a lot less h*ward but then I was expecting him to come up plus I'm glad it's happening now & not during cantwell's run#I'm pretty excited for the next issue since it's a flashback to the wca/silver centurion era... overall I think the characterisation is#still pretty good so I'll just hold on to that#iron man#marvel 616#tony stark
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Why the hell is Al Pacino paying child support at EIGHTY-THREE years old???? His old a$$ should be playing bingo, drinking syrup and dancing to old tunes. What his baby mama did to him is really f*cked up. She deliberately got involved with a man who is on a very delicate age and probably manipulated him in some way so the moment she would get pregnant, she could benefit from his wealth. Al Pacino won't probably live long enough to complete his child support payment because by the time his child turns 18, he will either be 6 ft underground or his ashes will be inside an urn. Let this be a lesson to the men who are fooling around with these chicks at older age and who refuse to get married young because "I still got time as a man". I'm sorry, but age still has an effect on you no matter what, and there is no way a mofo in his damn 80's should be paying CHILD SUPPORT. This whole situation is messy and shady.
#al pacino#child support#baby mama problems#txt#his baby mama is not innocent she knew what she was doing. she is honestly trashy#one of his family members will have to finish that sh*t cuz al pacino will probably “leave” before he can complete it#this is why y'all shouldn't be having children this damn late#and it's not just the life expectancy you just don't have the same energy anymore#his child will be 10 years when he is f*cking 90#like wtf#nah man. both parties f*cked up#although his baby mama is still a pos to me imo. idc what anybody else says#like c'mon there is no way she fell in love with him because of his attractiveness or personality or anything else#he is old as hell. he could be her grandpa lmao#she saw that pocket#like i know it's normal to joke about women extorting old men out of their money but honestly it's messed up#these mofos are at age where they are more vulnerable and all of that even if they take care of themselves and have good genes. old age is#still old age. then these women come by and the old men enjoy having some female company or whatever but these chicks are waiting for these#old men to die so they can get money out of them. you really think these old mofos are gonna have immense power of these younger women? lol.#they are manipulating them. it's foul behavior
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the worst bit about being Super Excited about a new original project is, like. the knowledge that. at best. people aren't going to see it for a year and a half to two years. and that it's really hard to go "hey trust me I'm going to have something so cool in like two years so please stick around now"
#my life#writing#and honestly that would be if I had time to legit work on it every day or at least on a solid weekly basis#which I. am not really sure that I will.#given that (a) I have a bunch of open projects including open original projects that I also need to be working on#but more importantly (b) right now my financial situation is such that if given the choice between working overtime and writing#I *NEED* to choose overtime#and will continue to need to choose overtime for the forseeable future#quite possibly years of the forseeable future#really REALLY wish I was making enough money off of writing right now for it to be a regular thing in my life#the hilarious catch 22 of it all is that I don't really have a chance of making maybe some actual money off of writing#until I'm actually publishing original works#and I don't have time to work on original works bc everyone who is currently following me for writing cares about my fanfiction#hence what little time I have is going to that#leaving me unable to finish my original works and maybe turn this into enough of a career that I can do it as much as I want to#(although also who am I kidding my game plan is still publish all my original works for free / 'choose your own price')#(just kind of. mildly hoping. that enough people might like the thing to choose an average ebook price)#(and the money all works out)#just like. hnnng. I know I shouldn't complain bc I do have a solid job that pays well#I just have a household with a bunch of people relying on me for income and a bunch of moving expenses to pay off#and Actual Human Babies on the horizon#and a bunch of responsibilities to people who aren't me and I don't Regret it but every once in a while I stare#at the things I could be doing and wish that I didn't have to choose Responsibilities over Writing#(this is brought to you by The Heart And The Heartless being so fucking cool)
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who gave sharp the audacity to be so kind, loving, sweetest person. D:< no amount of words i can put up will ever be able to contain the vibe he has; i desperately need a drink with him and i dont even drink and he doesn't even exist!
#smiletalks#ipeak#that man...............#that man instantly turns any of my ideas into a therapy session; hang on i wrote a fic in tags again#im working on a fic and it has 4.4k words chap where it's just him and mc talking through some ministry related topics#she s been down lately because interrogations took a toll on her despite not leaving a slightest shadow on her marks#sharp isnt pleased she used studying as a method for coping with everything#and it didnt escape him mc didnt want to think farther than her owls or rather the day she will leave the school for the summer break#WHICH HAD CAULDRON OF THE PROBLEMS POTION OF ITS OWN#tldr; mc is an incredibility tough for her age but crucially inexperienced to hold up the pressure put on her#and the amount of decision making#gurl is tired#let her sleep bring back the happy-go-lucky kid she used to be#WRITING FICS IN THE TAGS AGAIN.#idc ill keep on so sharp is wlling to save the day#“She might have grown up faster than her peers -- which shouldn't at all matter for her inner child still enjoys pumpkin fizz and snidgets”#“Although her penchant for brandy worries me. Why would a 16 years old young witch need so much?.. DOES SHE SMUGGLE UNDER MY WATCH. PEEVES?#“nvm turned out she has a granian somewhere; evidently it was stolen by poachers and kept in misery until taken into her care.”#“Also the reason her shoulder was dislocated a couple of weeks ago; *dares not mention he needed its hair; gets it for birthday as a gift*”#*doesnt know what to do absolutely flustered and loosing it but thanking mc she sent a package rather than handed it after class*#*or hed refused it or talked a way out of such a convenience*#*FAVORS MUST REPAY*#*his turn of not accepting refusals now*#“Always a pleasure to have students with high standards for discipline. Although. In her case -- someone needs to keep an eye on her.”#“We had a talk. Talks. We needed to be sure we'd pestered each other enough with 'silly questions for obvious answers' as she had put it.”#“I am up for the responsibility; her inverted sense of danger makes her jump at your presence Matilda I am so sorry I couldn't fix it in --#“-- in a few months. I truly mean an apology but neither of us should worry atm as her summer has been delegated to Mrs Sweeting.”#“I won 30 btw. Oh. Ask Dinah. Or Mirabel. I'm not disclosing until you know full details but I do wonder what were your suggestions.”#“........Thinking on it now how miserable I'd become should she chosen your nephew. Seeing is believing; she put up quite a play.”#“Until she blew everything up like an erumpent but I wouldn't say more. So.”
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#wondering if i should go back on dating apps#it never gave anything to me#i'm just a sad combination of unwanted things put together#and i attract people i am not attracted to (no one's fault i guess)#racial profiling is tough as people think 'looking like me' makes me interested in them#while having nothing in common and even things i don't want to deal with#but now that i'm older maybe things could be different#although men in their late 50s with nothing in common with me is also a thing#and with my gender identity and being demi while unfortunately looking very much like a woman...#it shouldn't be so hard#but it is#and i feel extremely alone#and it's really weighing on my mental health#friends and family are so far from me#i could use some nice companionship...#anyway i'll delete that later i just needed to put it somewhere
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Nuh uh I'm not here to be fighting someone else's fight, y'all need to sit down and talk. CALMLY.
#i care and want to help all mentally ill ppl but this is ridiculous#like imagine being so chronically online to think this debate is even actually important.#the book for PSYCHOLOGISTS is maybe MAYBE for people who understand it#“its in the science” BRO PSYCHOLOGY IS PSEUDOSCIENCE#EVERYTHING IS MADE UP OR NOTED DOWN FROM EXISTING PPL#AND THE LAW ITSELF DISAGREES WITH YOU#again this is not my fight#so idk who is calling who what now#although i did see a CERTAIN side being meaner.#also if you have a personality disorder with DID... shut up#like be more aware of your own symptoms ffs#its easy to hate a group you dont like dont WASTE YOUR TIME ON IT BRO#cccat vent#be for fucking real dude im not following cluster bs to hear about syscource#maybe some opinions shouldn't be said.#syscource
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