#also what the heck happened to this place
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Hey everyone!
I'm still (somewhat) alive!! 🥳
I did this way back in 2020 actually, but it was meant for a zine (which, to my knowledge, never saw the light of day) and since I've been going through my computer and saw this, I figured I might as well post it now. At least it might fit the summer vibe (not where I'm at though, here it's only rain all day long...)
Hope you guys are all doing well x
#yes this is like a personal blog post okay#I'm done playing the cutesie clean and sorted social media profile thing. That died with the start of my unending hiatus back in 2020.#also what the heck happened to this place#this is not the tumblr I remember#I'm too goddamn old for this#insert old-man yelling at cloud meme please#anyways#reylo#reylo art#ben solo#rey#star wars#summer#digital art
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Something super valuable about studying history, especially back into ancient times is having an appreciation for how enduring humanity is. Like yeah yeah in the cosmic or geologic or evolutionary schemes we're insignificant, but we have also been through a lot, of our own making and of nature just throwing shit at us. When you think of history as extending back to before modern conceptions of a state or people or culture, and extend your definition of society to more than what resembles nation-states and continental empires, you realize we have been everywhere for very long time, and its hard to really imagine an earth without us.
Even if everything gets fucked to shit by late-stage capitalism or like some random disaster people will live on. Maybe not in super-consumerist mega societies, but there will still be idiots gathering around a fire somewhere to laugh at each others jokes, someone playing with their pet. People will still want to sing and make images on the wall and imagine things. People have lived under wraps of lovingly made cloths in deserts, peoples have lived proudly on horseback on rolling steps, people have found peace and community living in flooding rainforests, people have just been making it even in what may seem to be extreme conditions. So many cultures tell of surviving a world-ending flood, so many cultures declared themself the endstate of history only to become chapters in our textbooks - we fucking endure!
And realizing that even these extremes of societal and ecological collapse have been endured, I can be kinda chill about the fact that nothing will ever be over so we should never actually stop trying to hold together. Holding together doesn't have to mean keeping up an incredibly wasteful and/or inefficient society, it just means doing our best to survive and help those around us. This is not to dismiss the massive amounts of human suffering that come with societal upheaval, but as I am trying to say, focus on helping your neighbor instead of woeing over that which was always destined to fall beginning to fall.
People are more valuable than concepts. Be kind to yourself and others. And uh. If America or something collapses press F to pay respects and think about the cool mythology we'll get to invent about it.
#been thinking too about how ive heard the much of western european thought focuses on history as progress#while elsewhere you get the idea of history as cycle which is so much more accurate#not that society does not build on itself but “progress” implies an end point which will never happen#you can just make each cycle a bit more bearable a bit more humane#the us especially is such a young country in the grand scheme of things built on both some awesome ideals and some massive sins#nothing was ever meant to be forever but maybe it uh was really not meant to bes for so longs#idk maybe im just paranoid but im just thinking about how cooooked my generation is for this culture#but not for this world! very important there will always be a place for people#just not always the concepts we come up with like capitalism lol#shut the heck up#midnight rambles#sometimes i realize its a midnight ramble at the end like i look at the clock and im like --#-- “yeah i wouldnt have typed this at 3pm this afternoon”#history#i love my history books literally everyone ever is in it#its also very long#what do you mean this is a fandom blog?#not fandom
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there are two wolves inside of you. One of them is fretting that you went through all the effort of making a new art account just to pigeonhole yourself once more into a specific fandom, which holds you back from exploring original art concepts that you care about. The other one came up with three separate ace attorney comic ideas in the last hour alone and isn't stopping anytime soon
#laurellala talks#am i unwell? perhaps#i also drew like 5 more sketchy comics i haven't posted#and a full colored drawing i haven't posted bc i'm overthinking if i need to attach comics to it also or post on its own#i want to draw more muppets interactions and come up with an actual theoretical muppets ace attorney case!#they would get to explore the muppet studio as a location aaa it would be so cuteee#and i'm in the middle of drawing a comic of miles and nick video calling and teasing a young trucy (i love trucy)#and i NEED to draw nick and maya interactions from trials and tribulations case 3 it's so sibling coded agh my heart#also i want to draw lisa basil in general the roboty software company lady#i want to design an ace attorney self insert called Laurel Lyre (you're a liar) and draw sprite expressions and character interactions#she would be an art student that Nick knew from college and she was painting a still life of the scene of the crime#and her painting has something different than how the crime scene looked which is used as proof in court#ALSOOO i had an idea for a silly comic of nick visiting miles in germany (platonic coded)#and of either a comic or short story idea of them going out to dinner together. This one is hard to explain but it would be good#I WANT TO DRAW FRANZISKA TOO i have an angst comic idea for her! And i want to draw her as a kid in dance class#i feel like she has so much scrutiny of herself which is very “i was in dance as a kid” coded. Ballet probably#I ALSO have a comic idea of a holiday party that took place before miles' murder trial but after steel samurai case#where miles begrudgingly talks to phoenix to avoid small talk with strangers and they talk about college#specifically like. it is canon to me that phoenix was in an improv group in college. That's where he learned to bluff. he's so silly#i also want to make a comic of the parents at trucy's school trying to sus out how old nick is#since he's only like what 17 years older than her?#I also want to make a gilmore girls joke but i can't tell if this is too dated to be funny. Do people know this show still#i had never watched it before so i just watched like half a season of it just to make a joke. It's cute.#What Else. I have like 5 animatic ideas but i need to ask my friend what she uses to make hers bc in the past I've used imovie on my phone#do not recommend#and if i don't draw everything RIGHT NOW i'm going to lose interest and nothing will get made!!!!!!#andandand I STILL NEED TO FINISH TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONSSSSS#i got sooo far i'm doing so well in the waitress case#i need to finish it so i can finally understand apollo justice and know what the HECK happened in that time skip#ace attorney
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God, Erikson is right with that one - not everyone feels the same about being diplomatic, trying to talk through an issue rather than throw fists. Heck, that might be why they end up working for Khunshu almost every night; The travelers of the night oftentimes get into trouble because of some idiots out there doing illegal, harmful things - not wanting to talk about anything but preferring to let weapons handle whatever they need to deal with. The thought causes Steven to sigh, a somewhat somber smile to appear for a moment there, accompanied by a nod.
"---I guess the world would be a better place if people were to allow conversation to happen." But that's just part of the problem, and not the entirety of it; Steven knows that conversations alone will never be enough to bring world peace, but... it could be a first step to becoming a more understanding nation. They will never end up there, he's aware of that.
---Anyways. Hearing the other opening up about his own experiences when it comes to... well, this, Steven's curiosity is latching onto the whole thing immediately - eyes wide, intrigued, focused. It's fascinating, the fact that Erikson used to have a coworker diagnosed with DID; And, well, the thought that follows after is what Steven can also give as an answer to the question that follows...
"---We... we haven't, actually. Not that I'm aware of." That's the thing: Steven's never met anyone who's going through the same thing, who's made of... what they are. Many personalities existing inside one body, sharing a mind, a brain, all of that. What he is aware of, however, is that their system is kind of unique because of the fact that they've gotten so utterly close - from reading a few books about mental disorders, googling about DID as a whole, Steven's found out that it does happen, the relationship-thing between alters, but... it's not common, far from it. Some might even only go through it because of therapy-purposes; Because, in the end, the goal for most is to mend back together into one person, to have the split parts reconnect and turn whole once more.
Marc, however, does not want it to happen. They do not want it to happen. Yeah, truly unique they are, and definitely not a system that should be looked at too closely - or taken into consideration when educating oneself about the whole thing.
Steven blinks, then shrugs, smile turning a bit sheepish. "I... I did read about DID and educated myself a little. But I have never really met anyone who's diagnosed with it as well. ---It's a rare condition to have, I think - and I also suppose that many who have it do not open up about it just like that. I mean, we usually don't - this..." He points a finger at his new friend, then at himself, "...Is an exeption. Only one other person really knows about us existing the way we do, and... well..."
Another shrug, and Steven clears his throat.
"May I ask... what your previous coworker is like?" Are they similar to what Marc, Steven and Jake are? Different, perhaps? Yeah, Steven's definitely curious about that one.
"That's a good thing." Sterling confirmed with a nod and an amused grin. He had to admit he rather liked Steven's happy, fidgety personality. It was still strange seeing it with Lockley's face but he was already separating them in his head as two complete individuals, as they were.
How exhausting it must be. Sterling barely felt like he had enough time in the day to live his own life. To share it with others, to share brain space with several other individuals full and complete memories. Well, he had some idea what it was like to have another entity in your mind, but that was a different beast entirely.

"I couldn't agree more. Sometimes diplomacy is the best solution. It doesn't always work out, unfortunately. Not everyone feels the same way. I like to at least try it first and see where it goes." He'd gotten his nose broken a few times over it. Thank goodness SHIELD had excellent medical.
Sterling tilted his head when Steven ventured to ask a question to show he had his full attention and to continue. He found himself quietly nodding along as Steven spoke, confirming his suspicions before he even had a chance to speak.
"You did. And I am. Was. An old coworker of mine. I only met a few of the personalities but it is probably why I was more quick to figure your situation out than most." He smiled fondly to himself at the memory of Agent Takatsukasa. Eve was so small and quiet. Nervous. Solomon was a bit more brash. Mouthy. A protector. He liked that kid. Eden... Eden he'd only known briefly but she had described herself as the keeper. He covered for her at work when Solomon came out since he didn't exactly know how to do Eve's job and didn't have clearance to see any of her files. He usually had him work at his desk, sorting files and making copies until Eve felt well enough to resurface.
"Have you ever met anyone else with D.I.D.?"
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"I don't usually mind getting mistaken for staff in stores from time to time, but today... I didn't really count on someone coming up and going on some tangent about the terrible service when I was just trying to sit and read in peace with my drink. It was so... embarrassing."
He's just going to hide his face in his hands.
("I forgot how scary customer service can be. Sorry to the manager of the store...")
#isola mini#ic;#ambrose having to deal with irate NPCs: what did i do to deserve this#i don't think i've posted a mini about this before so for the heck of it#i imagine it's probably a bookshop/cafe type place and that's part of why this happened. but also left it kinda vague
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via @swatercolour here on Tumblr and also on [insta]
EDIT: I do not interpret "just managing" as "just suffering, just enduring, curling into a fetal position and waiting for it to be over." Managing is an active process.
So I'm using this post as a platform to make the reminder that "the power of the people is greater than the people in power," and we all are cordially invited to:
Take good care of ourselves. Mental, physical, emotional health. Hydrate. Move if we can, get outside if we can.
Keep up a routine. Remember quarantine and we all had to find a routine? This is the same.
Be intentional in our news consumption. Let's not stick our heads in the sand but let's not doomscroll either. Get an RSS aggregator. Subscribe to WTF Just Happened Today, Yoour Local Epidemiologist, Fix The News (for some inspiring hopeful news!). We'll check our feeds a few times a week, but no more than once a day.
Connect with friends and loved ones. Remind ourselves that while SOME people are horrible, for the most part people are awesome... if complicated. Share our fears but also our hopes. Eat together.
Now that we're keeping healthy, safe, sane, and hopeful... now we also fight. Quietly if we prefer, loudly if we prefer. But sustainably. I hate that I had to live through three rounds of this nonsense where a few people use half of us as tools to fuck over ALL of us, but here we are again. So let us take just one moment every week or so to...
Use 5calls to keep blowing up our reps phones. Tell them to either break ranks with the Orange Administration, or to stand up louder than just matching outfits and signs. Or to THANK them for standing up.
Use Vote411 to find elections before the midterms. A lot of villages, cities, townships etc have local elections that will affect where we live... and more importantly, the people in office there will affect things upwards too.
Use Ballotpedia to know exactly what's on our ballots ahead of time.
Protest, because it actually works.
Use Vote.org to make a plan to vote in the midterms. Make a plan that is immune to voter suppression tactics. Get our documents in order. Reach out to our friends to go to the polls as a group. Plan to livestream our visit, up until the point we have to turn our cameras off.
Make and share memes that promote hope, organizing, solidarity, and/or resistance.
Get involved with an action network like Indivisible, MoveOn, or Working Families Party.
Go to a local town hall meeting. Speak up.
Heck, start our own local activism networks, letter campaigns, call campaigns, or fundraisers with Action Network.
And we will remember our self-care. We will remind ourselves and each other that they want us scattered, focus is how we resist.
It IS coming back. Things ARE going to get worse. The world has become a place where a very few people are pulling levers and pushing buttons that are actively destroying much of what is good about living in a society where people care for each other.
Many others are in shock, sputtering "but can they do that?" MANY many others are waiting for someone to come save us.
But there are those who are actively, loudly, opposing.
And there are more people speaking up, acting up, every day. More people saying it's time to get scrappy. It's time to get into some good trouble. The shock is wearing off.
Yes, it's gonna get worse before it gets better (the long-term damage of the acts of the past momentum of all the damage that has been done will take that long to be felt -- but it WILL get better.
If WE will it.
#hope#resist#I have this image on my screensaver#I could NOT find the art on Tumblr or I would have RB'd it#I could find it on Xitter I could find it on Insta but not here#Tumblr I beg you - search please#and yeah I'm updating this with text from my Take Action post
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How do you take a photo of time?
I've been watching the track events at the Olympics since I was a wee lad. It was a tradition in our family. We'd gather around our ancient low-definition 19 inch CRT television and watch tiny blobs compete against other tiny blobs and root for our country.
It was a bit like watching YouTube on your phone in 144p.
Several heroes emerged.
Jackie Joyner-Kersee was amazing.

You can't forget about Flo-Jo.

And then the Olympics decided NBA players were allowed in the competition.
Which formed... The Dream Team.

Was this fair?
Well... they won each game by an average of 44 points.
So... no. It was not fair.
Though it became more fair as time went on.
But, umm... yeah. The other teams looked like the Washington Generals and the US looked like the Harlem Globetrotters if they stopped screwing around half of the game.
But my absolute favorite Olympian was a runner named Michael Johnson.

He was cool as heck.
For one thing... gold shoes.
But he also had this crazy, upright, Tom Cruise-ish sprinting style that just made him look like a running robot on the track.
And in the 1996 Atlanta games he just trounced EVERYONE. I mean, it wasn't even close.
Yikes. Those losing blobs are probably really embarrassed.
Last night I decided to invigorate my nostalgia and watch the track events again. And I got to see one of the wildest races in history.
It didn't even last 10 seconds but it was one of the most exciting sporting events I've ever witnessed. Almost every runner won the race.
After I saw that initially, I was like... who the heck won???
Even in slow motion I wasn't sure.
This was one of the closest finishes in history. There has never been a race where all 8 runners were within this margin.
The arena was silent as the winner was being confirmed. The runners just kind of paced around waiting for official word. My best guess was the Jamaican runner, Kishane Thompson. But then the loudspeaker announced Noah Lyles.

The last tiny morsel of American pride burst out of me with a big "Wooooo!"
I forgot what it was like to be proud of my country. I wish it happened more often. But this young man, despite being last place in the first 3rd of the race, turned on the afterburners and won in a photo finish.
And that's when my inner nerd took over.
Because when they showed the photo finish image, it looked super weird.
Why is the track white?
Why do all of the runners look all warpy like that QWOP game?

So I went down a research rabbit hole to figure this out.
Photo finishes are actually fascinating. The first photo finish captured the end of a horse race in 1890. But that was mostly luck and timing. The actual photo finish mechanisms weren't used until 1937.
Originally they would film the finish line through a physical slit.
And the first horsie head that appeared in that slit would be the winner. This technology ended a huge aspect of corruption in horse race fixing almost overnight.
But we have come a long way since then. And I'd like to introduce you to the Omega Scan 'O' Vision Ultimate.
This slow motion camera sits fixed on the finish line of every race. The concept of the photo finish has remained remarkably similar to the 1930s approach. The camera sensor is specially designed to only record a vertical slit.
Only the finish line itself is actually captured.
And because it limits what it records to only that slit, it can capture 40,000 frames per second to get amazing temporal resolution.
So why don't the photo finishes just look like, well... this?

That is because the camera takes a picture of time more-so than dimensional space. I guess it would be more accurate to say it *assembles* a picture of time.
As the runners cross the finish line, the camera combines all of the little strips of pictures into a single image.






It's almost like if you tried to reassemble a piece of paper after it had been shredded.

Imagine each strip of paper is a picture of ONLY the finish line, just at a slightly different point in time.
What if someone stopped on the finish line and didn't move... what would that look like?
Once they got there, the same part of their body would just be repeated.
So the right side of the photo finish picture represents earlier in time and it just assembles the image strip by strip as time passes and you literally get a picture of time itself.
NEAT!
Okay, but how do they determine the winner from the photo finish?
I mean, that shoe looks like it is ahead of Noah Lyles!
Clavicles!
The IAFF rules state the foremost part of the torso must cross the finish line first. And the endpoint of the torso is the outer end of the clavicle.
So if you get this bone across the finish line first, you win the race.

Two more fun facts!
The start of the race is actually just as carefully timed as the end of the race. There are sensors in the starting blocks of each runner.
The starting gun also has an electronic sensor.
They have determined the fastest a human can react to the sound of a gun is roughly 100 milliseconds. So if you start running before 100 milliseconds they know you didn't actually hear the gun, you just got antsy and started running too early.
And the final fun fact...
Did you notice the Omega logo at the top of the photo finish?
That isn't superimposed or added after the fact. That is captured by the camera.
But if this image is composed only of tiny little slivers, how did they get the Omega logo to show up?

That is a little display. And it is synchronized with the Scan 'O' Vision Ultimate to show a little sliver of the Omega logo for each frame captured.
So when the final image is stitched together, it looks like a cohesive logo at the top of the photo.
Pretty clever, Omega!
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when you're mad and use their full name
how the blue lock boyfriends react when you're mad and use their full name
pairings: isagi yoichi, nagi seishiro and itoshi sae x gn!reader (separate) | warnings: little arguments, angst if u squint, reader is kinda hot headed? lol, mostly fluff and the boys wanting to be in your good graces.
notes: did i kick depression in the ass to finish this? not really. but it worked, and here i am! this is my nagi seishiro debut omgggg hopefully i did him justice and he's not too ooc. also new design for the scenarios to match my theme. enjoy, lovelies! let me know if you'd like especific scenarios and send me an ask :)
masterlist
ISAGI YOICHI
yoichi hoped he would die.
really.
it’s the least he deserved for making you angry — even more so because he didn’t know what made you angry in the first place. he spent the last fifteen minutes excavating his mind to try and remember what could have ticked you off so much that you don’t even wanna look at him.
he hates it. isagi needs your eyes on him, needs to hear your voice and touch your skin. and with the way you’re so silent and distant, he might be just like a man in the desert without water.
“baby,” he looked at you on the other end of the couch, intently watching the tv show in front of you. just a glimpse would make him breathe again. just a nod would ease his nerves. hell, he would even take a glare, as long as you were looking at him.
but he got nothing. zero. nada.
“baby, please,” he tried again. “i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to make you mad.”
you furrowed your eyebrows, but still didn’t spare him a glance. he sighed.
“i’ll never do it agai—”
“do you even know why you’re apologizing, isagi yoichi?!” you asked, exasperated. your boyfriend froze on the spot when hearing his full name, because of course he didn’t.
as far as he knew, you were having a great day together. he bought you breakfast from your favorite bakery, you made a delicious lunch and then you two went out shopping. he even gifted you with a beautiful necklace after an enthusiastic shop employee offered to show him some pieces—
oh.
“you got jealous of the saleswoman?”
“blah blah you got jealous of the saleswoman? heck yeah I did!” you impersonated him with a high pitched, sarcastic voice that showed just how mad you were. “she was all over you, yoichi, and you didn’t do anything!”
he swallowed thickly, daring to approach you on the couch. he hugged your frame, despite the crossed arms in front of your chest making it a little hard.
“i’m sorry, darling. i didn’t even notice she was being inappropriate because you’re the only one i pay attention to. and i always figured people would never dare be so bold if you’re by my side and we’re clearly together.”
his sweet words coated you, making you glance away, knowing that looking at his puppy eyes would end you for good.
“you should have done something anyway.”
“i know. i totally should, and i’m sorry i didn’t. i never meant to make you feel bad or let people disrespect you.” he rested his chin on your shoulder, breath shuddering right on your ear.
the sincerity in his voice was enough to chip away your anger, and you visibly relaxed in his embrace. yoichi held a breath of relief, knowing he still had to be careful.
“i’m sorry, baby. it won’t happen again. forgive me, please?” he placed a sweet kiss on your cheek, and god, how could you keep being mad like that?
damn isagi yoichi and his genuine blue eyes.
you uncrossed your arms, embracing his instead, and finally looked at him with love again.
“fine. but just because you’re so charming, ‘ichi.”
he chuckled. “you’re the charming one. i’m totally under your spell, darling.”
and when your lips met, yoichi hoped to keep living just to have more of you.
NAGI SEISHIRO
people would often ask him if his detached, nonchalant persona ever got in his way through his life. seishiro would always say no, because everything and everyone he did care about understood his lazy way and inability to do… pretty much everything.
that didn’t mean he never made the effort, though. as much as nagi liked to live like a sloth and just go on with his life playing video games, there were still things in his life that were worth it. like football. his friends. and you, of course.
ever since you met, seishiro discovered that being with you wasn’t a bother. and after he fell in love and you became a couple, he found himself eager to indulge you, even if it meant going out of his way. his friends congratulated him and expressed genuine happiness to see how much he improved, and that, along with your beautiful smile, filled his heart with joy.
however, no matter how much he tried, he was still…
“nagi seishiro.”
a shiver ran down his spine with the sound of your voice, and not the good kind. he had never heard you sound so stern, so angry, so… disappointed, even. enough to leave a sour taste in his mouth. so much so he immediately lifted his eyes from his console, only to find your harsh gaze.
“ehh? wha’ did i do, angel? don’t say my name like that,” he pouted, crawling towards your body splayed on the bed.
even when you tried to fight his embrace, nagi took advantage of his large frame to engulf you and lay his head on your chest, so you wouldn’t walk away in case you got any angrier.
“babeeeee,” he whined, hugging you tighter.
“let go of me,” you said, and he just shook his head. “you deserve it. you weren’t even listening to what i was saying, were you?”
what a hassle. he really wasn’t listening, but… well, he got way too focused on beating the last boss. could you really blame him?
he heard you scoff. “oh, my bad, i should have known it was the last boss. it’s more important than me anyway, right, nagi?”
fuck. fuck. fuck. did he say that out loud? he sounded like a dick. you had every right to be mad and call him by his full or last name.
nagi lifted his head from your chest to look at you, feeling his throat tighten with the sight of your teary eyes. guilt gnawed at his chest when seeing how upset and frustrated you were.
“eh, ’m sorry, pretty thing. i got too caught up ‘n didn’t notice you were talking t’me.”
“am i that invisible to you?” a tear almost rolled down your cheek. seishiro shook his head, a little more exasperated than usual.
“huh? ’f course not, angel. y’re never invisible. all i see is you. y’re the most important to me,” he held eye contact, and even though you wanted to tear your gaze away, seishiro’s eyes were more magnetizing than ever, even if your view was a little blurry.
you knew your boyfriend wasn’t the type to lie, since he always claimed it was a hassle. you knew you were important to him, but his lack of consideration still hurt.
“i’ll apologize as many times as you wish. ‘m sorry for not listening and making you feel bad. i never wan’ you to feel bad, pretty thing.”
nagi used his strength to roll around and switch your positions, in a way you were on top of him instead. he started caressing your hair in a soothing motion, making your eyelashes flutter. “y’can talk as much as you want. i promise i’ll listen t’you.”
your eyes welled with tears for a different reason, and you hugged the striker as hard as you could. even if he faltered, seishiro never failed to make up to you and make you feel loved.
“promise, sei?”
“promise.”
ITOSHI SAE
although sae wasn’t exactly smart in the emotions field, he always knew when you weren’t happy with something. you scowled, huffed and rolled your eyes, keeping an eerie silence that was only broken when absolutely necessary.
at that moment, he was sure you weren’t happy with him.
you both kept to yourselves while still at the event, masquerading any problems for the cameras. sae had a hand at the small of your back and he could feel how stiff you were. the midfielder wouldn't admit that seeing you so uncomfortable around him made his heart pang.
at the limo, the path to your shared penthouse was quiet, and you brushed him off when he tried to hold your hand. sae could only stare at his window with furrowed brows, itching to dissipate this awkward atmosphere. he never liked when you were mad, especially at him.
he expected some sort of explosion when you got to your apartment, but you kept your glaze off him, trying to walk to the bedroom for your night routine without even sparing him a word.
nuh-uh. that wouldn’t do.
he held your wrist before you could go, and lightly pulled you so that you were facing him. your eyes widened with the sudden movement, but narrowed as soon as landed on his face.
“why are you mad?”
you scoffed. the audacity of this man.
“you know exactly why i’m mad, itoshi sae.”
shit, the government name? you were really fucking angry.
“i wouldn’t be asking if i knew,” he answered, immediately regretting it when you glared at him, as if saying that wasn’t the right answer. “i-i mean… i didn’t realize what was wrong, amor.”
you walked closer to your boyfriend, making him release your wrist. despite his typical stoic face, sae was clinging to your every word.
“itoshi sae, you can not talk to your little brother like that!” you nearly growled on his face, surprising him. “you were very rude and condescending, and that’s no way to speak to rin!”
he frowned. you were mad because of rin? the little green monster inside of him threatened to grow, but he forced him to stay put. sae didn’t want to anger you further, so he simply let his hands slither to your hips, pulling you closer to him.
“i don’t think i was rud—” you lifted one eyebrow, and he rolled his eyes. “fine. i might have been kinda harsh.”
“and?” you crossed your arms.
he sighed. “i will apologize.”
“i’m serious about this, itoshi sae. i will ask rin—”
“i’ll tell him i’m sorry, okay? no need to keep talking about rin.” he interrupted, palms traveling to your ass while he nosed your neck. he planted a small kiss under your ear, huffing a minty breath that made you shudder. sae smirked. “and no need to keep calling me by full name, either. what happened to ‘cariño’?”
you held onto his biceps for some grounding, but still didn’t budge.
“you weren’t very sweet today, so it’s not fitting.”
he pouted while hiding in your neck, taking full advantage that you couldn’t see him, but was quick to withdraw to face you once again, touching your noses. one of his hands cradled your jaw, and you sighed with the pathetic effect your boyfriend had on you.
“perdóname, amor?” he whispered against your lips, eyes sincere like you knew he could be. your poor little heart could never resist him when he was like this, rarely vulnerable and eager for you.
you gave a long exhale, arms moving to tangle around his neck. and folded.
“as long as you make it right, mi cariño.”
© 2024 itoshiexx. do not plagarise, translate, or repost any of my work on here or other sites.
if you like my writing and would like to support me, you can 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐚 𝐭𝐢𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐤𝐨-𝐟𝐢 ! any amount is welcomed and very appreciated! ♥
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Your Weekly TV Guide
On Monday you can expect:
2:30 PM: Handplates/The Sims 2
And Tuesday:
2:30 PM: Handplates
Wednesday:
2:30 PM: Dream doodles
Thursday:
2:30 PM: The Mouse and the Mermaid
Friday:
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2:30 PM: The Mouse and the Mermaid/Just Desserts
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2:30 PM: Bunnies and piggies
Thanks for tuning in! (Patreon)
#Weekly TV Guide#The beginning of the Sims 2 sets >:3c#The one from this week broke actually lol hopefully it posts correctly#I also happened across a new tumblr glitch while trying to put it together! How not fun! :D#For some reason body texts have been deleting <3s - I assume because of the < - as well as anything after the <3#Which is very difficult for someone like me who deeply enjoys <3 <3 <3 <3-ing lol#I can <3 all I want here in the tags tho! So I will!#I do have other emojis and alt-codes but it's not the same#Hopefully it'll be fixed soon#Anyway#More original stuff this week as well :D I have some new faces to follow up the old faces!#Oh yeah and I managed to pick up AnOthEr background project which was not the first one!! What the heck me!#I'm thinking I'm gonna have to put that one fully on the backburner if I keep passing over it :/#Hopefully it'll come back around at some point but hey - if the system in place lets me work on other stuff too that works :)#Though maybe it's avoiding this one that makes me inclined to work on other stuff lol#Anyhow ♪ Continuing on ♫
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"Are you new here? I’m new too." What if the one she met wasn't Frank at all?
If somebody is interested in the madness “theory”, I'll put it right under here.
Keep in mind before continuing: this is straight up just a theory/headcanon, I'm gonna share it without any other purpose than having fun theorizing. I put some points you can follow, I am sorry this is gonna be long and crazy.
So, I believe the puppet Julie met could be...Wally.
This whole madness was caused by Julie's story in the video "regard forgetfulness silence"...
The memory The way Julie is speaking seems off to me, as well as the way she recounts her first meeting with Frank.
She "think" that's how she met him, isn't it strange she can't recall precisely how she met the dearest puppet to her?
We know Julie have difficulties with her memory, but she seems to remember stuff that happened when hanging out with Frank, why the most important moment is so unclear to her?
This could mean that she can't remember the interaction correctly and that her memories are being heavily corrupted by something or that the whole thing is made up by someone.
The encounter
Even the encounter is iffy, the puppet she met doesn't seems to speak like Frank Does.
"Are you new here? I'm new too. My name is Frank"
This speech pattern sound more similar to Wally to me.
And after that, she says that he made a corny joke and she laughed at it, we know that Frank is not really the one who tells jokes. Heck, he is not even good at telling them.
You could argue about Wally and jokes too, he's not very skilled at telling them after all, but I can imagine two scenarios: -Him speaking normally and not realizing he is saying something funny to her. (this could apply to Frank too)
-His best friend love to tell jokes and we know that Barnaby encourage Wally to chat and tell jokes to the Neighbors, it could be that noticing she was scared he tried to tell a joke to her.
The fruit basket
Okay now I am really looking into stuff, I know, but why would Frank bring a big fruit basket around? Julie says it's because he was going to say hi to her but we know the friendliest neighbor in the whole place is Wally itself. Wouldn't it make more sense for him to be the one going to say hi?
The fruit basket could also just be related to Wally going out into the woods to paint a still life since he is a painter.
“Was he mad?”
She was worried that "Frank" was mad at her when they met.
Strange, because Frank emotions are very easy to read, he's a very expressive puppet. We also know that when he feel a very strong emotion (like being mad) his head spins. Why she would question it? If it was Wally, his emotions are more difficult to read and it could be that she didn't understood his intentions immediately.
Wally itself
The fact she bring up Wally while recalling Frank's meeting is strange too. She says she met Wally the same day, why not meeting the whole neighborhood then? Maybe it was just them at the beginning and it would make sense in that case.
But Wally comes up at the end of the audio asking "Did all that really happen, Julie?" like he is asking her like all of that was made up or straight up incorrect.
Aaand I'm done! I'm not even sure any of this makes sense to anyone else, but it was stuck with me since the update and I wanted to draw it and share it.
Maybe it was Frank, maybe it was really Wally, maybe it never happened in the first place but... Everything sound too strange to be as the story says.
And don't get me wrong with all of this! I love Frank and Julie relationship a lot, I am not going against them in any way. I like to go deep inside the stories I am following and I speculate a lot about stuff! (Also I wanna apologize if my english is not the best, it's not my first language)
#welcome home#welcome home fanart#welcome home puppet show#appleblossom#wally x julie#julie x wally#wally darling#julie joyful#welcome home art#this is my madness taking over help
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BIG thing i get teased about over the years (in playful ways, it is fine buckaroos, but a light tease none the less) is the DIRECTNESS of my titles. many who stumble upon my books will immediately comment 'the title is so long it just says what happens'. here are some of my thoughts on that...
as with a lot of things in the tingleverse, my unusual artistic choices end up being a sort of TROJAN HORSE, called unserious and mocked by many, but hopefully over the years revealing something to buckaroos who are not tied to the separation of ‘low brow’ or ‘high brow’ art
i feel understood by most, but for some who JUST NOW encounter the tingleverse there is an automatic apprehension, from outright to subliminal. things like scoffing ’im not going to try and find meaning in a chuck tingle book’ (real quote) or 'skeptical of the horror, ive seen his OTHER books'
i have written a LOT about how much of this, whether buds know it or not, is not just about the dinosaurs and the living objects. it is about a culture that is built to see queerness and neurodivergence and (drumroll) SEXUALITY as fundamentally unworthy of ‘real’ artistic merit. this trot runs deep
theres SOMETHING ELSE i dont talk on much however, which is directness of my writing style, both in titles and on page. why i do it is this: AS AN ARTIST it is never my intention to impress you. my books are not the 'ME show' theyre the 'US show’ so i simply want my sentences to express what happens
i wont dance circles around you, leading you through the story saying LOOK AT ME LOOK HOW GOOD I AM IM SO COOL. i want to walk BESIDE you. of course, writing to impress is also great and valid art too, just not MY preference. this is ARTISTIC choice, but i want to talk for a moment on politics of it
i tend to see buckaroos holding a sort of STRICT interpretation of what makes ‘good’ art. it is a training that has been pounded into their heads declaring ‘real art cannot just come out and say what it means.' a good example would be if someone was being critical by just saying 'its heavy handed'
the thing is, there is a huge difference between saying ‘it was blunt.’ and ‘it was TOO BLUNT for what it was trying to accomplish.’ TIME AND TIME AGAIN however, you will see folks simply deciding ‘this art just said what it meant on the surface’ and leaving it there, as if that is INHERENTLY WRONG.
and the question i am forced to ask myself is ‘WHY is this wrong?’ in the vast, infinite pantheon of WHAT ART CAN BE why are we so obsessed with hiding ourselves? obscuring our thoughts? removing our politics? there is certainly a time for subtly, but it seems there is NEVER a time for being blunt
some say this is because arts more DIFFICULT to craft when it is subliminal, but folks do not REACT that way. art that is both direct AND subliminal and layered will STILL get torn down for leaving things on the surface, even when technically speaking it is probably most impressive to juggle both
there is plenty for you to research on this regarding the CIA secretly funding abstract expressionist art during the cold war. it is still HOTLY DEBATED, but i will mention it here for anyone reading my thread who is interested in a deep dive. HERE, however, i will talk about it on a personal level
i think that culturally we are CONSTANTLY told to not take up space, especially in marginalized groups. there is decades and decades of programming telling us ‘you can express yourself, but in a CIVILIZED WAY, not too loud, not too direct. CERTAINLY not too political.' i flatly reject this
of all the places to do what you want and say what you want to say, ART IS THE PERFECT ARENA. your writing, your songs, your music can absolutely be as subtle as you want, but especially during times like this, dont let anyone tell you that youre too dang loud. lets trot buckaroos.
and since i spent all morning writing this is am going to leave a link for my new book LUCK DAY, which is LOUD AS HECK. now is a time to make art, and it is also a time to support the artists you love. give a preorder if you can. LOVE IS REAL
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CookieSized!Beast Cookies x HumanSized!Reader
Cuddling Head-cannons!
Shadow Milk Cookie:
He’s super into cuddling, but only when he wants too. Like, man is clingy in the same way a cat is.
He would totally want to crawl up the inside of your sleeve like a gremlin and curl up on your chest.
Speaking of chest, that’s his favorite place to snuggle up too, either that or your face. Specifically your cheek since he’s tiny. (He likes to be a presence you can’t ignore.)
If you love cuddles prepare to be absolutely smothered in them. He wants to be all you can focus on in this world, and allowing him to cling to you is an opportunity he just can’t pass up.
If you don’t like cuddles then you are fresh outta luck because he does not care. It doesn’t matter to him how large you are, or how intimidating you can be. He’s snuggled up to you and he’s comfortable. Plus… since when were you in charge?
Like, if you’re resting he’s all up in your business, IMMEDIATELY. If you try to push him away enough times, he’ll walk off in a fake huff talking about ‘diva(s)’. But once you finally fall asleep he’s right back where he wants to be.
Ironically enough if you try to cuddle up to him without his prompting, he’ll play hard to get. Might even bat your hand away too- (well, as much as a itty-bitty cookie his size can to a human).
When he’s cuddled up on your chest, sometimes he’ll worm his way up to your ear. He’ll begin to whisper things, things he couldn’t possibly know. Tidbits about your day you never told him, stuff that has yet to happen, knowledge on how to help you succeed in future endeavors. You are normally asleep by the time this advice comes, so why does he do this?
Is it the joy he feels knowing that he has all the answers you need and all the control to tell you only when you’re not listening? Or is it something else? Only he has the answer to that.
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Mystic Flour Cookie:
She’s definitely not clingy, but she doesn’t mind it when you two cuddle.
I imagine since she’s the Beast of Apathy she is quite neutral about where she lays in accordance to you in bed. You could have her in your arms, your hands, heck probably even on the top of your head and she’d be ok with it.
She won’t admit this, but her favorite way to cuddle is with your head in her lap and her hand in your hair. Yes, you are still human sized. Also yes, she is still cookie sized. (You guys make it work though.)
Love cuddles or hate cuddles, she couldn’t care either way. Calm and composed, she decides when and when not to allow you to breach her personal space.
Although, if you do catch her off guard with a pick up and cuddle attack from behind. Even if she may not show it immediately, she doesn’t like when people just take what they want from her. Expect the cold shoulder.
On rare occasions, Mystic Flour can and will ask to be held. There’s something unusual about her tone, something more..alive.
When you have long since fallen asleep, she finds her hand stroking your hair absentmindedly. She then slowly lowers her body to lay against your head, all of HER own volition. For cuddling you was her choice, not your will. Hers.
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Burning Spice Cookie:
Normally, I would never think that Burning Spice would go for cuddles. Too boring and stagnant for his tastes.
But if you did manage to get him to cuddle, you bet you had to earn that. And it wasn’t easy. So if you like fighting tooth and nail for the right to cuddle, then Burning Spice is your man!
Battle against him, he doesn’t care how large and fleshy you are. He wants a fight, he needs a fight. If you want to cuddle The Great Destroyer, then show him you can handle it! (This is an every night before bed thing too).
Finally you win—(because let’s be honest..he’s like what, 3 inches tall?) —and now you’ve earned the right to cuddle. Burning Spice’s favorite place to cuddle is right against your stomach or heart, things he can hear.
Sometimes during these sessions, you can catch a glimpse of Burning Spice’s face, it looks empty as he listens to your body work and breathe. You wonder whats going though his head.
But as soon as it’s there, it’s gone and is replaced with his usual scowl as he loudly exclaims how ‘bored’ he is with the current situation.
As I’ve already explained, if you want cuddles Burning Spice is definitely going to play hard to get. Much like Shadow Milk in that sense. But on another note, much like Mystic Flour he doesn’t care if he gets cuddles or not. (If anything he seems to project more no than yes. But if that’s really true, why does he still offer to fight you each night?)
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Eternal Sugar Cookie:
Are you a couch potato with big emotions?! Do you like to cuddle?! Then maybe you should consider getting yourself an Eternal Sugar Cookie to keep you company!
They are a MASSIVE cuddle monster, (they might even be clinger than Shadow Milk in this sense) you’re like a big warm pillow! They are perched or nestled somewhere on you from 24/7 to eternity.
Their favorite place to cuddle is curled up on your neck. Wings draped over the sides of your shoulders in a sort of possessive hug. Feeling your pulse.
If you like cuddles Eternal Sugar is definitely a provider, and is pretty good at making you feel right at ease. I could imagine them curled up, tangled in your hair and lazily strumming at their lyre with droopy eyes.
Being the Beast of Sloth, I could see them using their power to perhaps make you feel a bit more lethargic than usual.
After a while with Eternal Sugar you might start missing your morning alarm, sleeping in, missing breakfast, lunch, maybe even dinner too…a couple days go by…wait, how long have you been sleeping for again?
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Silent Salt Cookie:
Tbh, I see this cookie as very hit or miss when it comes to cuddle time. Either they’re all in on some nice quiet quality time or they want absolutely nothing to do with it.
If they are into it I could see them liking sleeping tangled up in your legs (keeps you from moving too much) or I could see them resting in your hands, especially if you sleep with them curled up to your face.
Don’t expect any kind of talk though, if you start yapping while you two are snuggled up close they’ll just end up getting up and walking away. It’s silence or nothing. (And if you talk in your sleep, just forget about it.)
If they are not in the mood for cuddles, don’t try and convince them. Begging and pleading will only serve to annoy this beast. You gotta let them come to you, like a stray cat you gotta earn the trust of before they come inside your home.
On the days you guys cuddle, if you stay really quiet and still, you can feel Silent Salt press into you almost longingly. Is it despair? Is it loneliness? Want, need? It’s impossible to tell which emotion the beast is feeling with that helmet on. All you can guess is that they are comfortable in the palms of your hands. That’s all that matters…right?
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Fin and thank you for reading!
#headcanon#cr kingdom#cookie run kingdom#beast cookies#crk headcanons#shadow milk cookie#mystic flour cookie#burning spice cookie#eternal sugar cookie#silent salt cookie#x reader#shadow milk x reader#mystic flour x reader#burning spice x reader#eternal sugar x reader#silent salt x reader
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More of Stanley's sketchbook because he makes me sick /pos
(Just imagine he was looking in a mirror at the subway to draw this anshfhwj. The london bus ticket is unrelated, it's just a random knick knack he had lying around<3)
People weren't the only ones Stan met on the streets.
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+ this is an absolute fucking batshit WILD oneshot I initially wrote for these drawings that got WAY out of hand, if you feel like reading that.

The oneshot below is a stand-alone now, and in no way is related to the drawings above, but I just wanted to show you guys because Jesus Christ
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Winter of 1981, at a subway station Stan doesn't remember the name of-
The sorry excuse of a transport system that this hellhole of a city called a functioning subway was hardly anyone's first choice of a warm place to stay the night. And yet, here Stanley was; standing like an idiot in the middle of a small bustling stairwell that led down to the full screeching chaos of a train stop on a Tuesday evening. A rowdy crowd of exhausted office workers streamed out like a tidal wave from the entrance of the station, the bustle of their footsteps all too eager to go home and relax after a long day of work.
The faint, stuffy stench of old piss and sweat followed the crowd to the surface from the deep depths of a less than sanitary and overcrowded train station. The pungent smell intermingled with the crisp stinging winter air in a cocktail of shitty city gloom often associated with this time of the year; when the holidays were too far away and the sun seemed to come and go with practically the same 9 to 5 schedule as the workers had, leaving them going to work in the pitch dark and coming back out in the inky black as well.
He might have looked like he belonged there, depending on how one would want to look at it. He stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the sea of prim, pressed suits and neart uniforms. His ratty old jacket and generally unwashed appearance certainly didn’t help his case, but he also knew that stations like these also tended to shelter quite a number of homeless wanderers like him, especially during the winter. So, it wasn't exactly uncommon to see other sore thumbs seeking reprieve from the biting cold and the dangerous likelihood of frostbite from within the enclosed walls of the subway station.
Heck, if most of these underground kingdoms didn't also happen to be a breeding ground for several illicit activities, he might even have followed their lead. But, believe it or not, Stanley's already had enough experience with illegal activities to last him a last time, and he isn't looking for a new fill. He was satisfied with what meager shelter his trusty car offered him, as little a difference it might make in terms of safety.
Stanley's obstruction of the already narrow stairs with his loitering went unappreciated, as shoulders roughly shoved past him and swinging briefcases repeatedly bumped into his sides, usually coupled with a nasty glare and a snide comment or two. He paid them no mind, however. He wasn't here to start a fight with some random bum with a dead end job, as much as he thought it would probably do them both some good to duke their stresses out on one another.
The hours ticked by with wave after wave of new crowds being dropped off by a train and left to pour out of the station into the streets. By the time the streetlights turned on and the pale pink in the sky slowly faded to make way for the stark glittery black of the night sky, the tide of people had slowed to a trickle and rush hour was long since over. He was now the stairs’ sole occupier, with a few occasional stragglers stumbling up the steps and hurrying past him without a second glance.
Stanley did not move from his spot, however. He stood resolutely in the middle of the stairway, fervently rubbing his arms and stamping his feet in a futile attempt to try and regain feeling in his extremities as he waited. Rocking on his heels, he titled his head backwards to let his eyes roam the constellations that carpeted the endless expanse of the sky stretched out above his head, almost losing himself in the scintillating canvas of stars.
It reminded him of old times; of the sparkling beach sand twinkling in the dim moonlight, and the soft sound of lilting waves hovering in the background as he lay back on the cold wooden deck of his ship and watched the stars dance.
He still remembered every name his brother had once recited to him time and time again as he pointed out each star and galaxy from the night sky.
Then, like clockwork, he was broken out of his reveries by a telltale meow coming from below. The sound was a familiar blanket that immediately melted away the tension that had begun to build in his chest as he practically sagged with relief.
His body moved almost automatically as he leaned down to detach the frail tabby cat that was attempting to literally fuse with his legs, purring up a storm and rubbing her head against his pants as though her life depended on it. The cat gave a soft chirrup of dissatisfaction at being manhandled, which Stanley absentmindedly replied with a chiding click of his tongue as he lifted her up his chest and gently tucked her into his jacket in a practiced motion.
She thankfully remained blissfully limp in his grasp as he shifted around some more so that she was nestled comfortably inside the dark pocket of warmth inside his ratty jacket. The tiny warm lump that rumbled contently against his front radiated with heat, and his fingers finally began to feel like actual fingers rather than useless stiff frigid lumps of meat and bone attached to his palms.
A pointed cough startled him from his clumsy wriggling to get the cat to settle down. An oddly familiar security guard stood at the entrance of the station at the bottom of the stairs, leveling Stanley an unimpressed look with the metal gate in his grip already halfway closed, ready to seal the subway for the night. He must have been a comical sight; caught awkwardly bent over while trying to get his newly acquired cat to stop kneading biscuits on his stomach, with said cat peeking out from the gap between his collars.
Stanley faintly recognized the guard. He was a much older man, with a shock of thinning white hair neatly tucked underneath a dark blue cap and a strange depth in his eyes that reminded Stanley of the sea; with countless unspoken truths lurking far beneath the surface, but no less grand and knowing of all that the universe had to offer, as though he had already lived a thousand lives before this one.
He had seen the man around before, at another station, doing the opposite of his job by ushering stray buskers and homeless stragglers from the streets and into the (relatively) safe walls of the subway, instead of doing what any other law-abiding security guard would do and kick them out into the elements. He wasn't sure what the older man was doing here, of all places, since all the previous stations he'd seen the man at had been several states over, practically on the other side of the country.
A brief spark of panic shot through his spine at the thought that this man could be following him, but he quickly discarded the ridiculous notion as soon as it entered his mind. He had never even seen him before, and hardly ever even interacted with him; there was no reason for there to be any sort of bad blood between them. Unless he happened to be related to one of Stanley's many, many enemies, then perhaps his fear was a little warranted.
However, the old guard made no move to attack or do anything other than stare judgmentally, almost expectantly. For the first time in a long time, Stanley felt like a child being caught doing something he wasn't supposed to do. He tried his best to keep his uncomfortable squirming to a minimum under the unrelenting gaze, stubbornly returning the man's gaze with his own wary glare. His cat’s muffled whining came from inside his jacket. The traitor, she was leaving him to deal with the old man on his own.
With an exasperated jerk of his head, the security guard gestured towards the inside of the station. For a moment, Stanley stared dumbly, uncomprehending of what the old man could possibly want from him. Rolling his eyes, this time the man gestured more insistently at the small gap that still remained between the metal gate and the entrance, his arm sweeping the air in a low arc as he dramatically urged Stanley inside. Suddenly, it clicked, and Stanley shook his head.
“I have a car,” he said plainly, his voice echoing loudly in the desolate silence of the winter night that surrounded the unlikely pair.
He wasn't sure why he was so nervous, it wasn't as though he was lying. He did have a car, his trusty Stanley-mobile was parked safely away in the corner of an unassuming alley that wasn't often frequented by anyone. There was no way he was reaching it tonight, though; it was practically on the other side of the city, much too far away for him to arrive at a reasonable time. His nightly excursions to meet his small friend unfortunately left him with no other choice than to leave his car behind, the hunk of metal far too unwieldy and noticeable to drive around openly on the streets. He never knew who could be watching, after all.
He had simply been hoping to find himself a dark corner to tuck himself into with his cat, just for the night, but it seemed as though the universe had other plans. Or rather, this strange old man had other plans.
Although, if Stanley thought about it, the subway wasn't such a bad suggestion. This was one of the safer stations in the city; and with the rich neighborhoods being so close by, no rogue criminal or dealers dared to come near this area unless they wanted to be slapped with a hefty fine or face a higher potential to be arrested. And of course, there was the obvious shelter from the unrelenting cold that now seemed to permeate his bones, even with the purring warmth that was nestled inside his jacket.
So, that was how he found himself hunkering down for the night inside a shabby old subway station, with a satisfied cat still rumbling away against his chest and a strange old security guard locking down the gates behind him. The man said nothing as he hooked his keys back onto his belt and gave a firm pat on Stanley's shoulders as he walked past him, pausing to scratch his cat behind her ears before moving away. His footsteps bounced off of the grimy tiled walls with an odd reverb as he turned a corner.
“You'll be safe in here,” the man said, voice sage and gravelly. The words had a weight to them, and seemed to hang in the air with such a presence it was as though the old man had never even left his side.
The subway was empty, quiet. It was such a stark contrast to the loud rowdiness of the rush hour crowd these halls once held. Stanley hadn't yet registered the utter silence of the station as he aimlessly made his way down the winding, deserted halls of the ancient station. He mindlessly walked past the aged and peeling advertising posters plastered on the walls, his nose becoming accustomed to the stinging stench of the subway. The quiet seemed to swallow the sound of his steps as he explored the branching paths and endless tunnels. They were almost kaleidoscopic, dizzying, nonsensical. There were doors where there shouldn't be, and deadends where it didn't make sense.
The silence only began to truly settle in his bones the more he walked. He suddenly wished that he would head the telltale footsteps of the old security guard again, just to hear another sign of life in this underground hellscape other than himself. The ghostly memories of screeching trains and bustling crowds haunted the halls; now, only nothingness reigned supreme. He glanced down at his small feline companion, who slumbered away against his chest, blissfully unaware of his jackrabbiting heartbeat threatening to burst out of his ribs. The silence seemed to permeate every inch of space and crush the air out of his lungs. He couldn't breathe.
Stanley’s steps grew faster, more frantic as the walls and ceilings seemed to close in on him. They grew smaller, tighter; squeezing, trapping. He hardly even registered his cat's complaints as she was jostled around in his grasp, breaking into a full out run. His breathing sounded loud, too loud, and the world was collapsing around him.
When he finally broke out into a large, open platform, he could finally breathe again. He had arrived at the tracks, the empty tunnel where the trains would pass an empty, gaping maw in the wall that seemed to swallow all light around it and beckon him closer. He felt his cat wriggle out from within his jacket and hop out with a displeasured yowl, scampering away and disappearing behind a corner much like the old man had. True silence pierced his ears and thrummed like a deafening pressure in his temples. He was alone.
Stanley was stuck in that subway station for years.
#i only have the Paris and Korean subways as frame reference so i have no idea what american subways look like#just imagine the paris subway system- i heavily used it as a reference to draw and write these since it's#the only subway that I know AND looks 1980-ish enough to pass#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#gravity falls fanfiction#gravity falls au#<-ig???#there are mirrors in subways right- I've seen a lot of curved wall length mirrors at subway stations#stanley pines#stan pines#grunkle stan#stanley's sketchbook#tw liminal space#tw horror#<- I mean eh- my horror writing skills is sub par at best#cats#tw scopophobia#tw staring#on the other hand- stanley being friends with street cats!! so cute <33#you can visibly SEE in the fic where I completely lost my grip on the story from 'sweet story about cats' to 'oh my god what the fuck'#my art
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Billy Forgetting His Own Strength
Billy sometimes forgets his strength while in his Marvel form. Granted, that’s a rare occurrence, but still. It can happen.
It was especially common back when he was first starting out:
Marvel: “It’s wonderful to meet you Mr. Spy Smasher Sir.” *shakes his hand*
Spy Smasher: *notices grip is a little too firm and gives it a squeeze* “You too.”
Marvel: *squeezes it in turn*
Spy Smasher: *hand hurts but doesn’t want to back down from a challenge and also squeezes*
Marvel: *confused as for why they were holding hands for so long but squeezes one last time*
Spy Smasher: *hand fucking breaks*
The crunch was so deafening.
or
Marvel: “It’s nice to meet you, Robin!” *offers hand for handshake*
Robin!Damian: “You as well.” *hand goes to shake it*
Marvel: *literally lifting Damian off the ground, up and down as he shakes the hand*
Then there’s the times he forgets to restrain himself that don’t involve hurting or embarrassing others:
Marvel: *cracking knuckles*
Villain: “You’ll never take me alive you stinkin cheese!”
Marvel: *somehow dislocates all his fingers with a couple crunches*
*silence*
Villain: “Oh my- The heck??”
Marvel: “What, what is it?” *starts popping them back into place*
Villain: *disgusted at the sound of it and vomits*
Thankfully, all these incidents became more and more uncommon. One day, both heroes and villains alike will be free from his terror.
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Radio Silence | Chapter Eighteen
Lando Norris x Amelia Brown (OFC)
Series Masterlist
Summary — Order is everything. Her habits aren’t quirks, they’re survival techniques. And only three people in the world have permission to touch her: Mom, Dad, Fernando.
Then Lando Norris happens.
One moment. One line crossed. No going back.
Warnings — Autistic!OFC, silverstone 2021, racing injuries, detailed description of a panic attack, angsty as heck
Notes — Uh....... welcome to the Silverstone chapter (im sorry)
Want to be added to the taglist? Let me know! — Peach x
2021 (Silverstone)
In the days leading up to Silverstone, Lando filmed a video for Quadrant. Amelia sat just out of shot, watching the gameplay unfold with a grin that said, this is ridiculous, and I’m having the best time watching you all make fools of yourselves. When Lando stacked it and landed awkwardly on his arm, she was there in an instant, fussing over him.
A small portion of the clip made it into the final edit. Her on her knees, laughing, while Lando pouted dramatically, waving his arm around like it was much a more dramatic injury than just a scratch. It was lighthearted, sweet.
Everyone went crazy for it.
—
WhatsApp — 2021 F1 Groupchat
Lando N. Quick question. does anyone have any spare gloves?
Valtteri B. Like... racing gloves?
Lando N. Nah, just regular gloves. Leather, ideally.
George R. I’ve got some driving gloves in my car.
Pierre G. Of course you do.
George R. What’s that supposed to mean?
Pierre G. Nothing, nothing.
Lando N. Can you bring them to me? Amelia’s a bit icky about touch today, thought gloves might help. We’re heading to the track now and I couldn’t find any at my parents' place.
George R. Yeah, I’ll give them to Will.
Lando N. 👍
—
It wasn’t a stim. It wasn’t a meltdown.
It was just… discomfort.
She sighed in relief as Lando slid the brown leather gloves onto her hands. She swallowed, wiggling her fingers and letting the tension bleed from her shoulders.
The leather was soft and probably expensive, considering the gloves were George’s.
Lando squeezed her hands. “Better?”
She nodded, smiling. “They match my boots.” She held her gloved hands next to her knees, where her brown riding-style boots reached.
He snorted, laughing softly. “I don’t think George planned that, but I’m glad you feel fashionable, baby.”
Amelia glanced over her shoulder. Daniel wandered over, wiggling his eyebrows. “Excited for your home races, mate?” The question was aimed at Lando.
Amelia watched Lando, noticing how his face shifted; something complicated, something soft, but also guarded.
“Yeah. Just want to do well,” he shrugged, his smile a little too tight.
She frowned, instinctively leaning in. “You will.”
His smile flickered, uncertain. “I hope so.”
—
Max didn’t ask about the gloves. He just wrapped his arm around her shoulder and dragged her into his driver’s room, ignoring her confused protests.
He slammed the door, sat on the cabin bed, and stared at her.
She hovered, uncertain, glancing at the door before looking back at him. “Um…”
“I want to tell her the truth,” he said, eventually.
She stared at him for a beat, trying to decode his words, and then, slowly, her eyes widened. “You— I thought you told her months ago! Are you serious?” She choked out.
Max winced, rubbing the back of his neck. “I know. I know I should’ve done it sooner, okay? But I— I didn’t want to spoil it…”
Her anger flared, a sick heat bubbling in her stomach. “I told you to tell her the truth. That I’d hate to be lied to like that. And you carried on?” She was trembling. “So…. What. She still has no idea? About you, about all of this?”
He lowered his gaze, shame written across his face.
Amelia took a deep breath, stepping back. “I can’t even look at you. How could you—” She choked, nauseous, thinking of the girl who had no idea she was about to be dragged into this mess. “Has she told you she loves you?”
He was silent.
She let out a pained sound, high-pitched and sharp. “I don’t want to talk to you right now. Just… pass your thoughts on the car after practice to GP, yeah?”
Then she turned and walked out, her body coiled tight, her mind a storm.
—
She stormed through the garage, ignoring the stares from the engineers, and found Lando, her dad, and Daniel standing together.
Her dad spotted her first, eyes going wide. “Hey, honey. Everything okay?”
She shook her head. “I need to hit something.”
All three pairs of eyes turned to her.
Her dad sighed, glancing around. This wasn’t new. It had mostly happened during puberty. She’d always been hard to anger, but when it did happen, she needed an outlet.
“We’ve got some old tire blankets we can pile up. Should be soft enough.”
She nodded, her gaze distant.
He instructed a mechanic to start gathering the blankets in the back of the garage, away from the cameras and spectators.
Lando cupped her face, bending to meet her eyes. “You okay? What happened?”
“Max is an asshole,” she spat.
He blinked, shocked, before stepping back and nodding. “Okay. Yeah. I’ll go help with the tire blankets.” He hurried off.
She looked at Daniel.
He shrugged, making a face. “Max is an asshole sometimes, isn’t he?”
She nodded, jaw tight.
Then, out of sight of everyone, she took her frustration out on the tire blankets.
—
Max won the sprint race, setting his brakes on fire on the grid in order to boost the temperature in his front tires and give him a better start. It was risky, but it paid off, and he won. That took precedence over the extra work he’d given the garage crew overnight.
Another haul of points in their fight against Lewis.
Amelia didn’t have it in her to celebrate. She forced a smile for GP, nodded at Christian, but stepped away from the pit wall and headed straight to the back of Max’s garage, where Jos was sitting.
“Did you know about her? His girlfriend?” Jos asked. “I assume you did.”
Amelia stared at a spot of engine oil on the wall. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
He looked like he wanted to argue, to push for more, but she stood up and walked away before he could.
Lando finished P5. He fought with her childhood hero on track and came out ahead. For that, he deserved her attention.
—
She found Mark Webber just before the F2 feature race, holding a folded white envelope. She passed it to him as discreetly as possible, careful of the cameras and prying eyes around them.
He took it, glanced at it, and raised an eyebrow.
She shrugged. “Let him open it when—if—things go wrong. It’s a good offer. The best he’ll get.” She’d made sure of that. She wasn’t about to let him slip through the cracks if Otmar did what she suspected he might do.
Mark studied her for a moment. “You made this happen?”
She nodded.
“Come on, kid,” he said, after a beat, gesturing ahead. “I’m sure Oscar would love a chat before he has to get in the car.”
She blinked, then grinned. “Do you think he’ll mind if I look at his steering set-up? I’m so curious—”
—
Lando drove them from the track to the hotel. She liked his car. All sleek, black lines and a polished interior that looked like something out of a magazine.
“Is this your dream car?” she asked, curiosity in her voice.
It was nearly ten, the sky darkening, and Lando had one hand on the steering wheel and the other casually draped over her inner thigh. She’d swapped out her team kit after the sprint for his favourite skirt, keeping it casual but elegant for the evening’s media events. Daniel had made him do a shoeey on the main stage.
“No.” He shook his head, glancing at her with a playful look in his eyes. “Don’t tease me.”
“Why?” She raised an eyebrow, genuinely curious.
“I’ve always wanted a Jolly.”
She blinked, momentarily stunned. “A— A Fiat Jolly?”
He nodded, his grin widening.
She couldn’t help but smirk. “A Jolly? That’s your dream car?”
Lando shot her a mock glare from the corner of his eye. “Baby…”
“Sorry, sorry!” she laughed, pressing a hand to her mouth to stifle her giggles. “I just— I wasn’t expecting that.”
He shook his head, exasperated but still smiling, his eyes warm with amusement. “I’ll get one, baby, and I’ll force you to let me drive it everywhere.”
She hummed thoughtfully. “I’ll be able to match all of my outfits to it,” she teased, her eyes twinkling.
Lando rolled his eyes.
—
Max and Pietra were waiting for them in the hotel lobby the next morning. Amelia squeezed Lando’s hand as they approached, giving him a fond glance before skipping over to Pietra, who greeted her with a bright smile and a glance of appreciation.
“That dress is gorgeous!” Pietra remarked, her eyes lighting up.
Amelia smiled, twirling a little. “Thanks. It’s my favourite. Oscar De La Renta. I can wear it on the pit wall as long as I throw on a team jacket.” As they walked through the lobby, Amelia leaned in, lowering her voice just enough so the guys wouldn’t overhear. “He won’t say it, but Lando thinks it’s a lucky dress. Pushed me into wearing it today.”
Pietra smiled knowingly.
“Baby!” Lando’s voice called from behind them.
Amelia turned her head, meeting his gaze. “Yeah?”
“You got your iPad?” he asked, him and Max now caught up to them.
Amelia patted her bag, feeling the familiar weight. “Got it.”
“Good. Keep a close eye on it today, yeah? Group chat’s a bit tense at the moment.”
She frowned. “What’s my iPad got to do with your group chat?”
He shrugged. She narrowed her eyes at him. He kissed her.
—
Everyone could feel the tension between her and Max.
She sat in the strategy meeting, arms crossed, her focus locked on the data sheets in front of her. The only time she spoke was to correct a mistake or suggest a differential, her tone cool and efficient. Max, however, couldn’t seem to take his eyes off her, the weight of whatever was unspoken between them hanging heavy in the air.
When the meeting ended, she walked with GP to the garage, discussing overcorrection and heat cycles.
She managed to avoid Max entirely.
But just before the cars were due to leave the garages to line up on the grid, Jos found her. He was calm, but there was something demanding in his expression. “I don’t know what’s going on between the two of you,” he said quietly, eyes hard. “But I need you to put it aside and focus. This is an important race. He needs to win.”
Her response was a sharp nod, her jaw set. Without a word, she walked over to Max’s car. She leaned into the cockpit, eyes meeting his through the visor. The surprise in his eyes at the sight of her was fleeting; she knew he hadn’t expected it. She didn’t give him a chance to speak.
“If you don’t tell her by next weekend,” she said, voice low but firm, “I’ll find her and tell her myself.” Then, before he could react, she kissed the cheek of his helmet. Her voice softened, almost a whisper. “Win it, broer.”
Straightening up, she glanced at the mechanics; her unspoken signal to let him go. She turned back to Jos, who watched her with quiet approval. He gave a small nod, and she walked away.
—
She rarely walked the grid while the cars were setting up, but something about this year pulled her there. She found Lando under his umbrella, shielded from the sun, sipping from his bottle.
His eyes lit up when he saw her. She kissed his cheek, adjusting his fireproofs. “Be safe, do well. Love you.”
He pulled her in for one last kiss before she moved on. She glanced at the cars, each a blur of metal and energy; smiled at the mechanics, and shared a quick squeeze with Fernando. Finally, she caught Max’s eye. He stared at her for a long moment, before offering a small smile.
“Ah, Amelia Brown!”
She spun around, coming face-to-face with Martin Brundle.
Well aware of the camera, she forced a smile through the nerves. “Hi! How are you?” she asked, deliberately avoiding the lens.
“Good, good! So, we saw you give Lando a good luck kiss. Think McLaren’s got a good shot at scoring double points again today?”
“I hope everyone does well today,” she replied, only a slight tremble in her voice, “but of course, I hope Max comes out on top.”
He laughed, somewhat distractedly, giving her a quick nod before leading the cameraman away.
She glanced back at Lando. He was watching her with a proud, warm smile.
Her cheeks flushed, and she turned, head down, walking off the grid toward the pit wall.
—
GP settled beside her a few minutes later, handing her a comms clip. She gave it a cursive glance before she slid it into her ear and tugged her defenders on over the top.
“Makes it easier, huh?” he said through the comms, voice quiet and crackly, no need to shout through the defenders like usual.
She smiled. “You’re smart.”
“Coming from you?” He let out a long breath. “That’s the highest of compliments.”
She giggled softly, turning her focus to the screens in front of them.
Her stomach was already in knots, but that was nothing new; it always was during the formation lap. The calm before the storm. Her gaze bounced between Lando and Max, just as it always did, and not for the first time, she wished she had two sets of eyes.
They lined up on the grid. She chewed on her bottom lip, head tilted as she kept an eye on the tyre temps on Max’s car.
He hadn’t set them alight this time. Improvement.
Five lights. Four, three, two.
Lights out.
Max led from Lewis through the first corner. Her fingers fisted into the hem of her dress.
And then—
And then.
It happened in the blink of an eye.
Max ahead. Lewis closing. A slipstream through Copse.
Contact.
Suddenly Amelia was on her feet, hand clamped over her mouth.
She sucked in a shaky breath, barely hearing the roar of shouting from the garage, the pit wall, the radios. Yelling. Chaos. Outrage.
GP spoke into his earpiece — calm, measured. “Max? Max, come on. Talk to me.”
Her stomach dropped. He kept repeating his name, firm but steady, and she heard every word. The comm was still in her ear.
Someone’s hands landed on her arms; steadying her, holding her upright. She didn’t look, didn’t need to. Everything else faded.
She begged silently. Prayed. She didn’t know who she was praying to… she didn’t care.
“Red flag!” someone shouted. Or maybe whispered. Everything was warped and sharp all at once.
She blinked. Jos appeared in front of her, speaking, his lips moved but she couldn’t hear him. Just the ringing.
And then—
“He’s moving! Max is getting out of the car!”
The breath punched out of her. Her lip wobbled. Her knees gave a little.
“Fuck,” she whispered, broken and small.
He pulled her into him, arms wrapped tight. Unshakable. Steady.
She sucked in a sharp breath against his shoulder.
—
They showed her on the main feed.
A cutaway from Max’s crash, the Red Bull pit wall — GP calm and collected, Christian furious, and Amelia… utterly devastated.
She tore her eyes away from the monitor and stared at the floor. She was in the medical wing now, waiting.
51G’s.
A brutal shunt. Career-ending, for some.
Not for Max.
Him climbing out of the car unassisted had been a statement. A declaration. He was still in control. Still standing.
She looked up when Jos stepped out of the examination room. He gave her a nod, then gestured for her to go in.
She entered, and stopped cold.
Max sat on the bed, bruised but upright. Alive.
Her breath hitched. Tears welled instantly.
“Zusje,” he sighed.
She crossed the room in three strides and wrapped her arms around him. Not too tight, she didn’t want to hurt him, but close enough to feel his heart beating, his lungs working, the warmth of him. Real.
He stroked her head, let her cry it out.
When she finally pulled away, lip trembling, eyes darting, he asked, “What did you do?”
So she told him.
Panic in her voice, regret tangled in every word. She’d thought about it, imagined how she’d feel if it were Lando in that crash and no one had reached out. How small and useless and broken she’d feel.
Max’s eyes darkened.
“You called her?” he demanded, already reaching for her phone. “How did you even—”
“It’s too late,” she said quietly. “She’s already on her way.”
Max froze.
“I’m not sorry,” Amelia added, steady now. “If I were her, I’d want to know.”
—
She barely made it to Lando before he climbed back into the car for the restart.
“I love you,” she whispered against his neck. His arms wrapped tight around her, lifting her off the ground with the force of his hold. “I love you so much. Please be safe. Please, Lando.”
He pulled back just enough to make her meet his eyes, steady and sure. The eye-contact made her squirm, but it was important. “I’ll always come back to you, baby. Always.”
She let out a shaky breath, a small, high-pitched sound caught between panic and relief, and hugged him once more before his engineers pulled him away.
Pietra hesitated beside her, hands hovering, then dove forward, wrapping Amelia in a hug despite the warnings both Max and Lando had given her.
“You looked so scared,” she said gently, in Portuguese.
Amelia nodded. Didn’t pull away. Let herself be held. Over Pietra’s shoulder, she locked eyes with Max. He looked concerned, like he was ready to intervene, to pry them apart, but Amelia just sniffled and pressed her face into Pietra’s shoulder.
It was nice to have a friend.
—
“Amelia—”
She ducked her head, jaw tight, eyes hard, and turned on her heel without hesitation.
Her heart stuttered, but she couldn’t stop herself. She was angry… furious, really. He’d carried on, celebrated the win like he hadn’t just sent his rival spinning into a tyre wall. Accident or not, it didn’t sit right in her gut.
And maybe it wasn’t fair.
But Lewis had ignored her before, in Austria.
Now, it was her turn.
—
@/verstappie11 seeing amelia so scared after the crash was scarier than the actual crash. like can somebody hold her please!!!!!!! i never thought i’d be so happy to see jos verstappen lmao
@/pitwallprincess no bc the way the broadcast CUT to Amelia literally holding back tears while GP is stone-faced and Christian is raging… a genuine greek tragedy
@/helmetcamwhore wait why did Amelia look like she was about to sprint to max’s car herself 😭 give her a hug pls omg
@/softlandon4ever it’s the way Lando dropped everything to hug her before the restart… like. weeping. actual soulmates.
@/mercmafia She said “I hope Max comes out on top” on the GRID and then he COLLIDES with Lewis in lap 1??? nah idc what y’all say she’s the problem.
@/tifosislut69 Amelia Brown crying on live TV was not on my bingo card today. she looked DEVASTATED. get this woman a therapist now!
@/chequedflagged I get that she's emotional but Amelia being all cold to lewis post-race in the paddock was giving bad vibes…
@/gp2engine not everyone’s fave stem girlie Amelia Brown walking past Lewis like he doesn’t exist post-race. SHE’S MAD MAD
@/papayapixels watching Amelia literally fold into Pietra’s arms while Lando’s pulled away by engineers… god this garage has SEEN things today
NEXT CHAPTER
#radio silence#f1 fic#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 x ofc#formula one x reader#f1 imagine#f1 x female reader#lando x you#lando norris#lando fanfic#lando imagine#lando x reader#lando norris x y/n#lando norris fanfic#lando norris fluff#lando norris x reader#op81#mclaren#oscar piastri#papaya team#ln4#ln4 mcl#ln4 imagine#ln4 fic#ln4 x reader#lando x y/n#lando x ofc#lando x oc#max verstappen
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