#also the comedy just doesn’t flow very well

[fantasticgothicpeachsludge]

Me the entire episode: Girl don’t trust him!! He killed your bestie and your masters padawan!!

[cerise-on-top]

EEEE BACK AGAIN CUZ YOUR WRITING IS YUMMYYY

Valeria, Graves, König, and Soap (separately) who has a s/o who's into poetry?

like maybe they're a poet or a librarian or something.

bonus points for a silly little cozy aesthetic dressed s/o :33

MANY HUGSSSS

-☁️

(CLOUD ANON)

Hello again! Welcome back! I'm glad my silly writings are enjoyable to people! I wrote it so Reader is a librarian and writes poetry both, in most of these! I think I forgot for Soap! I hope these are good enough! Thank you very much for the request! ^^

Soap, Valeria, Graves, König with an S/O who likes Poetry

Soap: While he may have read some poetry throughout his life, but only because he was forced to at school, he doesn’t care for literature like that in the slightest. Sure, he can understand some metaphors and some messages a piece of writing might try to convey, but he won’t go out of his way to buy himself an anthology of William Blake. He doesn’t have the time to read, and he doesn’t really want to either, he’d much rather go outside and take a hike. However, once you come up to him with one of your poems in hand, he’s more than happy to sit down and read through it. The way the language flows, the way the words intertwine with each other and form something unmistakably beautiful, it has him in a chokehold after a while. He’ll always cheer you on, quietly, while writing and read everything that you put on paper. While he might not be the best at giving criticism, he can use his words to reassure you that your writing is, indeed, the bomb. If you ever release your works then you can be certain he’ll be the first to buy a copy of the book, maybe even several because he loves and supports you that much. He loves the cozy aesthetic you have. Beige cardigans with either matching trousers or skirts. If you’re roughly the same size then let him borrow one of your cardigans, he wants to feel for himself how warm and cozy they are. It’s not usually his style, but trying them on won’t kill him. He actually also kind of likes it when you send him pictures of you drinking tea or coffee with a book on the table. It’s, as mentioned, very cozy, very comforting. You’re living your best life, you’re happy and thriving, and that’s all that matters to him.

Valeria: Unlike Soap, she has picked up books after school. The only poem she has read after school was the Divine Comedy by Alighieri since it sounded interesting to her at the time. She never finished it, though, having become far too busy with the military and, afterwards, the cartel. She doesn’t particularly miss reading either, though. Maybe sometimes, when she just wants to have a nice and quiet day, she might pick up a book she found just lying around, but that book could contain just about anything. While she might not always have the time to read your poetry, it will likely be sitting on her desk for a few days before she can read it, she will visit you at your library. It’s calm there, it’s quiet, and likely not a place anyone would suspect someone of her caliber to be. While she might not particularly be there for the books, you could read her some poetry every once in a while. Doesn’t have to be at the library either, you could just check out a book and read to her at home. She can appreciate something like that, you spending time with her, reading your favorite poem in a soft, almost mellow, voice. She gets to see you happy, after all, and that’s what she’s usually striving for. Even if that library isn’t doing too well, she’ll always make sure that it’s up and running because you love your job as much as you do. She, too, likes your aesthetic. It’s fairly neutral, it doesn’t stand out too much. While it might be a bit boring to her occasionally, since you likely would look just as lovely in something a bit more flashy, she won’t tell you to dress you any differently. In fact, she might instigate you a bit and egg you on by buying you expensive coffee beans or expensive hand made tea. The most aesthetically pleasing tea pots and cups will be yours, in this case you won’t even need to ask her.

Graves: Graves has not picked up many books after school either. The occasional book on business and history, yes, but nothing that was written lyrically. It never interested him, he had to analyze poems at school and that was the start of his disdain for poetry. He never did well with writing down what a specific metaphor might mean, so he never got any good grades on that. At first, he won’t be very happy to see you’ve brought him a poem, even if it was written by you, but he won’t complain, he’ll read it and give you honest criticism. He’s better with constructive criticism than Soap because he can still see the poem’s flaws while being nice and uplifting about it so you can do better next time. It likely won’t ignite a spark for poetry in him, but he has a soft spot for you, so he’ll read anything you want him to see. On the off-chance he has time to visit you, he will. While he might not be as quiet as Valeria, he tries, but he just really wants to converse with you. He doesn’t get to see you often, so it wouldn’t be too unlikely for him to waltz up to your library in his gear either. He tries not to scare the people, but it doesn’t always work. Tries to convince you to go home early with him so you can pay attention to him instead of burying your nose in some books. It doesn’t work, but hey, an attempt has been made. He really digs that entire cozy aesthetic. You look warm, you look soft, you look like you want and need a good hug from him. He’s a very touchy person in general, but that goes up by 100% since he likes the feeling of your cardigan, it’s made of wonderful fabric. If you’re more of a coffee drinker, like he is, then you can drink some coffee at a lovely cafe together, he knows plenty of nice and calm places. Tea, too, but you’ll be alone in that endeavor since he’s a coffee drinker first and a human second. Send him some cute pics of you, though, he’ll appreciate them after a mission and tell you how good you look.

König: He sort of likes poetry, actually. While he hasn’t read enough to actually have a favorite, he likes the way it sounds when read, either out loud or in your head. While he, by no means, could ever write a poem himself, English or German, he does like to read some every once in a while. He has an anthology at home he never got around to finishing. It’s a calming hobby. However, he finds himself with a favorite poet once you show him your writing. He’s very supportive of you, asking you fairly often about your progress and how you’re doing, answering any and all questions you might have that might bring you some inspiration. Whenever he writes it’s somewhat dry, mostly because he’s used to writing reports these days and nothing else, so seeing your flowery, beautiful language makes him smile a bit. It makes him imagine the scenery very vividly, even if you don’t specify too much of your setting. He, too, will come visit you at work when he can, but he won’t make a ruckus. If he can talk to you, that’s fine, if he can help you sort some books, he’d love to, but if you just want to do your work in quiet, then he’ll grab himself a nice book and sit down quietly until you have time for him again. Might ask you some questions regarding some books, might ask you for some recommendations as well, but he respects your want for quiet. He also really likes your aesthetic, it’s such a contrast to what he’s used to. You don’t look like you’re fighting wars, you look as though you sit down at a park bench during late spring or early autumn to read some books, and he thinks that’s very nice. If you want to, then the two of you can sit together in silence while you’re reading some poetry and he’s reading the Schachnovelle. He’s more than happy to tell you about what he read or listen to you reading some of the poetry out loud as well. It’s nice, it’s calming. It’s so far away from what he normally does at his job, he could fall asleep to the comfort of it all. If you’re reading at home, he might put his head in your lap and just take a nap.

[pixelephant]

ok long ass paragraphs of nuance time

so i totally get why watcher has made this decision, running a creative business on youtube is difficult because algorithms are fickle and views are SO obviously geared towards just when shane and ryan specifically are in content. they can’t branch out into new ventures and cast members and ideas without taking a huge monetary risk of if people will actually watch the damn thing. so streaming gives them that opportunity because no matter the viewership, they still get that income.

but on the other hand, the lack of diversified content is exactly why im hesitant to pay money for the service. there’s just not much there outside of shane and ryan led shows. don’t get me wrong, love their stuff! but if i’m paying for a service, i’d prefer it to be something i can go to for a variety of things.

it’s a catch 22 imo, can’t diversify without the money, can’t get the money without the content they know gets them the views, and so it goes back and forth ad nauseam. personally, i can’t see myself immediately paying for it, but maybe in a few months time when they have that freedom to actually change up their roster i’d be more interested

okay shifting gears, not to be the guy that compares this to rooster teeth and dropout but im gonna be because people are picking one or the other to support their own argument and its bothering me. "rooster teeth proved this method doesn't work!" not true, they shut down because they were owned by warner brothers, a big media conglomerate that doesn’t care about restructuring something to make it work, only dollar signs (while also not exactly being well known for being the best at handling their money). i still think rt could’ve continued to exist in a different capacity if they had never sold to wb (and didn’t have so many scandals) but i guess we’ll never know.

“dropout proves that this system works!” also not true they offer VERY different kinds of content (game shows, story based stuff like d20, pure improve comedy, etc.) from what watcher is doing, they are not a one to one. also as good as they’re doing now, they’re still kind of recovering from the verge of bankruptcy, trying things out, seeing what works. the system itself is not a guarantee for success.

all this to say i get why some people hate this decision. it’s yet another subscription based service to pay for in a media landscape that is frankly too rife with them. it makes things once free now costly. it puts exciting content behind a paywall that some people genuinely cannot afford.

but the people making the exciting content need stable jobs. the company needs a consistent cash flow to be able to pay their employees and continue making cool and interesting things. they can’t rely on the fickleness of youtube views, algorithm changes, and third party sponsorships at the pace they’re going (which is also part of the problem, they grew to fast and honestly set too high a standard of content from the jump for how early into the company they are but hey let’s not go on yet another tangent).

i think the announcement as a whole could’ve been more successful if it wasn’t hyped up ahead of time and/or if it was a more gradual shift to paid shows than a ripping of the bandaid. i also think essentially saying anyone can afford it for $5/month is a bit insensitive so now people are just grasping onto that instead of discussing the reasons for the change. but saying, “a majority of your audience is broke college students this isn’t the move!” isn’t gonna help or change their decision. i’m sorry but they don’t care. companies are not your friends.

[sincerely-sofie]

Honestly you meantioning them makes me want to see- do you have any canon designs for any of Twig's exes?

(Referencing this post)

Two of Twig’s exes have been seen here— they’re both dittos, and the only exes Twig dumped herself instead of being dumped by them. The meinfoo-ditto was uncomfortably sycophantic towards Twig and the maractus-ditto was honestly just a jerk in general who liked to psychoanalyze people in really condescending ways. However, Twig says she has six exes in this comic. While I don’t have unique canonical designs for any of them yet, I have a handful of notes on Twig’s other four exes!

Blake the Meowstic

Kind, but also extremely lukewarm. Wasn’t really enthusiastic about their relationship and just went with the flow, which wasn’t a good match for Twig.

Knows how to yodel, pick locks, and breakdance, amongst many other assorted skills. Gets bored frequently and learns the basics of a new hobby whenever this happens.

Was incredibly uncomfortable hearing about Twig’s past and felt out of his depth with uncertainty on how to respond to it. Ultimately, he broke up with her because he was so unsettled by her backstory.

Ends up in a loving relationship soon after he broke up with Twig— he’s with a very peppy Drilbur who doesn’t mind taking charge and getting low-energy responses, which he really appreciates.

Clay the Scrafty

A farm hand who enjoys gardening. Taught Twig a lot of wildflower’s regional names when she expressed a love for them and also described what areas they’re considered weeds in.

He gave Twig the wrong address to send letters to when he moved out of Verdant Village later on in their relationship. This was an accident. Twig thinks he ghosted her after she sent a letter explaining her backstory, but he thinks she just never wrote to him because she lost interest. Some poor Machoke out there got a letter from a complete stranger explaining her trauma to what she assumed was a loved one and had to awkwardly write back “I think you have the wrong house number.”

Moved on from Twig and became a well-known local comedian loved for his physical comedy acts.

Litany the (Mega) Ampharos

Goes by a name he chose himself.

Very vain. Constantly talking about himself. Refuses to de-mega-evolve despite it clearly impacting his health to be constantly in that state because he feels it enhances his looks so much.

Twig liked his enthusiasm for literature and intensified her efforts to improve at reading so she’d be able to bring up books she read personally for them to discuss. This ultimately soured her motivation to read much at all after their break up.

Was surprisingly self-aware and mature about how he dumped Twig when she shared her story with him— he said that he was startled by how much she was willing to open up to him when he barely opened up to himself, that she deserved someone with more sensitivity to their emotions than he had so that she’d get the sympathy she deserved, and then wished her well before telling her he didn’t want to see her anymore.

After he broke up with Twig, he was really rattled and started attending counseling sessions. He’s now a lot more sensitive to his emotions and has started weaning himself off his mega stone to focus on improving his health. He’s still single and doesn’t want to date again until he can totally uproot his fear of being seen as ugly.

Picket the Charmander

Twig got along great with him, and he matched her energy very well. They were two peas in a pod.

He was secretly very insecure about being unevolved and in a relationship with Twig. Her being the physically stronger one between them made him feel inadequate. Twig kind of knew something was up, but he denied it whenever she asked.

He ended up using her backstory being “too much” as an excuse to break up with her when the true reason was because she was an evolutionary stage above him. That really stuck with Twig, and she gave up on dating after he dumped her. Thankfully, Ark wasn’t someone she had to go to a singles’ meet-and-greet to find.

[worldsareall]

Be Cool! Scooby Doo

I’m not seeing enough love for this series in the wake of Velma. While it doesn’t present the same character growth and insight into the characters dynamics that Mystery Incorporated does, it is a comedic and sometimes cynical evolution of the gang that is a few curse words away from being an edgy adult cartoon. It has the syntax and flow of Seth Macfarlane comedies without the offensive shit. The characters ring true with their cannon past, but are also evolved in some really engaging ways.

We have Fred: he has the confidence and knowledge his character has had since its origin, but with some of his “well-meaning but oblivious” ways that defines his character in Mystery Inc, without it being as over-the-top. He remains the leader, but the gang and audience are more inclined to question it.

Velma: now voiced by Linda Cardellini Kate Micucci (“Marcy” Hotdog Water in Mystery Inc), we lose some of the bite the Mindy Cohn put into the character, but see a more awkward and vulnerable side of her. Still badass, just in a new way.

Shaggy: He is a little less oblivious, still food-obsessed and scared but a little more present. Same goes for Scooby.

Then we have Daphne: This is my absolute favorite evolution of Daphne. She’s annoying. Like, just sort of obnoxious because she keeps on picking up these hobbies and unabashedly engages with them in front of the group who are a little sick of her shit but also can’t hate her for making socks puppets of them, or having a falcon, or acting like it’s a middle-school sleepover when they’re forced to spend the night in a haunted house. She’s such a weird person, and turns a character that has mostly been framed as “cheerleader popular girl” into a very ADHD theater kid and I love it.

I can see why fandom has not clutched onto this show, it’s not very plot heavy, but it rings true to Scooby Doo’s origins as an amusing light hearted comedy with funky mysteries, but replaces a lot of the slap-stick with wit and gags.

[yaraaltrospace]

Top 10 Annoying Orange Videos

Some people don’t like Annoying Orange, but for those that do, I wanna make a top 10 of episodes. As far as I researched, besides the channel itself posting a top 10 of episodes based on views, I don’t think anyone actually posted a Top 10 of Orange episodes, and I honestly think it deserves it.

The show created by Dane Boedigheimer, which was intended to be a one episodes thing, grew up to become something beyong he or any of us could imagine. This show revolves, obviously, around the main character, its ways of annoying directly or indirectly other foods, objects and guest stars in the kitchen. Though sometimes a joke CAN be carried for far too long, there ARE some good episodes that show the potential of this webseries and I’d like to show you some of my favorites.

Now, there are various holiday themed episodes, like the Christmas and Halloween themed ones, and certain episodes from Shocktober and Ask Orange series, and of course MANY movie spoofs. These are not entering the list, sorry. I’ll be focusing on episodes that are not part of a series, are not technically spoofs, challenges, or asks to any character. Mostly pattern adventures in the kitchen, other locations and those I perosnally think that used the comedy better. 

NOPE, not using the first ever episode, it’s cheating!

10 - Close Encounters of the Annoying Kind

Yeah, despite the title it isn’t a spoof episode, but it does involve the main idea: Pear and Orange get abducted. By what? Greys? Xenomorphs? Predators? Nope, BROCCOLI! Alien Broccoli! And I’m really sure the short-lived Cartoon Netwrok show took notice of this episode and saw an opportunity there. Really, I do like most of the episodes in the show, so don’t you dare judging me.

Back to the episode, that’s basically it: Orange and Pear are in a spaceship, with alien broccoli planning to dissect them. I just question why Orange seems to LIKE Justin Bieber, but this episode IS from 2010, so it was before we knew who he really is. I also really like the Broccoli Leader voiced by Evan Ferrante aka NotTomCruise. This early episode has a simple premise, the jokes flow properly, it’s good. I really like it.

9 - The Amnesiac Orange

I was torn among this one and The Exploding Orange, but honestly, I think this one has a lot more funny potential. Basically Orange gets hit in the head by a canteloupe and forgets who he is. Then, an apple comes by and trick him into believing he’s an apple. That is brilliant, and a little mean. But then again, he IS an apple.

The casting is excellent, the memory loss scenario is used very well here, and for such a short story, we have quite a lot of laughs. I at least laughed very much at this one.

8 - ZOOM!!!

Another basic plot: Orange takes an energy drink. Just that has plenty of potential, like in the Family Guy episode New Kidney in Town’s beginning. The energy drink that gives the episode its name is voiced by Bobjenz, well known for the voice of Grapefruit. And it might be the pitch, which is actually something well handled by the webseries’ characters, but hearing Zoom’s voice and excitement at his first appearance brings a big smile to my face. 

Also, adding a bit of venting here, in early episodes, Pear’s a lot more patient with Orange. He’s annoyed like everyone, but he still handles it with patience Orange’s hyper boost. Later episodes show Pear as intelligent and often hysterical, and always trying to hard to be something he isn’t. Like, in his extreme challenge videos, he seems to care too much about what others think of him. This early episodes Pear has a good will, patience and doesn’t deny being Orange’s friend, even though he’s annoying. I miss this.

7 - The Fruitbowl!

Orange and Pear narrate to us a Superbowl game and Little Apple literally becomes a part of that game. In Brazil we have the World Cup transmissions, but boy, the Superbowl events sound and look awesome, from the games to the crowd and performances. Heck, Michael Jackson started this trend.

There are funny moments, great slapstick and everyone gets a moment to shine. Marshmallow’s cute show is short but any moment with them is so cute. Please don’t bring up the gender discussion, It was settled recently that they're non-binary. This is a very good episode in my book.

6 - Clam’s Casino

This particular one is among those I hit replay for. A clam and his associates bring up a Vegas-style casino to the kitchen and we watch the Kitchen Crew, as we expect, bet and lose all their money. It’s a cliché, but clichés work when they’re properly used. 

Brock Baker gave a great performance as Johnny Clam, and the jokes are well-written and portrayed. Certainly we’ll think twice before we gamble.

5 - Pickleback

I’m really confused about why people hate Nickelback. What happened? What did I miss? Anyway, this episode shows obviously a pickle version of the band brainwashing food to get pickled despite their song apparently being awful.

And Orange’s annoyance actually manage to save the day for once. This is quite refreshing and enjoyable to see: Orange helping his friends with what he can do. Another video on the replaying book.

4 - Fan Boy

At a certain point, we were and maybe still are all fanboys and fangirls, and when we get to meet our idols in person it’s like a dream come true. Imagine being a fan that’s a fan of the Annoying Orange? 

Fan Boy’s behavior sort of remind us all of how we feel in this sort of environment. He even quotes the fan joke from an episode and how vintage things are. This episode works with what it has very nicely.

3 - Limes

Brad freakin’ Paisley! Really, Brad Paisley comes to the kitchen as a lime to cheer Orange up with a song. Musical episodes are always good, and Brad is really talented. This one reminds me a bit of Excess Cabbage, de in facto first episode of Annoying Orange I watched. So I hold it really dearly to my heart and added it to the replay book.

The song, the environment, the optimistic message, it’s a gem. I so reccomend this episode and this song.

2 - Cookie-DOH!

Everyone in the kitchen hides for Dane’s cooking something and when the oven gets open, a piece of cookie dough voice by Alexa Losey can’t wait to get in, and explains how she wants people to eat her, and the scenarios she often thought about. 

I relate to her with having big expectations and feeling very upset when none of them come true, and reality is a b-word with us. It’s a feeling we all got to deal with and maybe still have to. I call this one a relatable character and this episode a great one on my list.

Before taking a stab at our number one here are some Honorable Mentions:

Best Fiends Forever

Grapefruit moves into the kitchen and Orange and everyone else can’t even. And also a different side of one of our favorite foods.

The Leprechaun Trap

A clever parody of advertising, as you probably seen in SNL multiple times, and on many Youtube viral videos.

Bacon Invaders

Just having Harley from Epic Meal Time means we’re off to a great episode!

Annoying Marshmallow

Unlike Annoying Pear, I really like Marshmallow doing Orange’s job, and actually making everything great and enjoyable for everyone. Really, Marshie, you are the best!

The Land Beyond the Kitchen

A train ride to the title’s world and the promise of the best adventures ever.

1 - Magnet Madness

This is another on my replay book. Orange and his friends are witnesses of a situation between the fridge’s magnets, two of them voiced by Ross Everett and Eric Scwartz, later the voice of the Gaming Grape. I love bullying-dealing episodes of any media, and this one has great comedy, born from the simplest parts.

Yeah, Orange and the others are mostly aside, but they still are a part of that whole thing. This is a very funny, very good written, very interesting Annoying Orange episode. It might not be for some people, but any episode that shows a great way to deal with a bully is a fine one for me.

Do you agree with the list? What is your favorite Annoying Orange video?

[notsosilentsister]

Thoughts on the ending of Succession

I think Shiv's choice is fairly rational actually. It saves Roman, and if Kendall doesn’t kill himself, it might save Kendall too. But that was probably not on the top of her mind; I think she did it for naked self-interest.  At the start of the episode she might still think she could work with the boys, but over the course of the episode she finally acknowledges that's just not going to happen. Kendall will never accept her as boss or co-boss. Because sexism. Because he's Kendall. He won't share the power. He's staked his whole life on the crown going to the eldest boy, and there's only one crown for only one head. Kendall would never crown her, and it turns out, neither would anyone else. No one believes in her like that. Because sexism. And also because she's Shiv. I think Shiv finally realizes that she can't be on the throne, no matter what. And if being the power behind the throne is the best she can do, there's an argument to be made for picking Tom's throne instead of Kendall's. It's worse for her pride, it makes her look weaker, and it might even be a sentimental miscalculation that the baby could give her more leverage than a continued stake in the ownership. But from a purely financial perspective, thinking about it in terms of future discounted cash-flows, it's definitely what I would do.

So the baby might not give her all that much leverage, fine. But let's face it, neither did her stake in the ownership. It gives her a vote, it might even give her title as COO or even Co-CEO, but it won't automatically make Kendall listen to her. She doesn't trust him to make good choices, to not go off the rails, and when he does, she'll have to plot again to depose him, or the value of her share goes down the drain. It would be a constant struggle. She's just done with that. Investment comes with risks, and she won't take a risk on Kendall. So she takes the pay-out. Makes perfect sense. Giving it to Tom, eh, it's of course a humiliation. But he'll earn more than he could ever spend as CEO (even if he might not stay in that position for long, all those potential scandals just waiting to be exposed) and a lot of that will be eventually left to Shiv’s baby. She'll still be the richer one in the marriage though, because of the pay out, and he’s still just Matsson’s puppet, a position she disqualified herself for by showing too much pride - so while he can probably make her eat a certain amount of crow now, there's very much a limit to the amount of crow he can make her eat. He might have the upper-hand temporarily, but that might just mean they’re more evenly matched taking the long view. And now that they’ve killed all sentiment between them, their business alliance might well be the most robust thing Shiv ever built.  Shiv realizes that she can't have respect, so she chooses the money. Of course these people are all so fantastically rich that we can't imagine money still being a concern for them, but money is power just as much as a crown, and often the more useful part of it. Shiv choosing money over pride is the most rational thing anyone has ever done in this story. 

But emotionally, it’s still devastating.     Of course her final vote is not a power move, but a sign of giving up. Just like Roman, she has finally accepted her limitations. Unlike Roman, she’s does not feel liberated by that acceptance. Her limitations are not just limitations of personal ability, but also limitations forced upon her due to her gender. Clearly Shiv has always known that sexism is still a thing, but she thought she was an exception; she's never shown much solidarity with other women, she clearly didn't really think she would share their fate. And that recent ordeal with Matsson has robbed her of those illusions. There's a phrase from a restoration comedy I had to read for college, that will always stick with me, a scene in the third act: The couple is already negotiating the terms and condition of their impending marriage, the woman keenly aware that this is the last time she's got any leverage, hellbent on getting as many concessions as possible before she's ready "to dwindle into a wife". That's what's happening to Shiv - she's dwindling into a wife. She's realizing she's in the same position as the lady in the restoration comedy. This is the last time she's got any leverage. These guys need a yes from her now, and they will promise her all sorts of stuff to get it, and these promises will be worthless, because once they get that yes, she won't have anything to hold them to it. So Shiv trades her yes to Matsson not for a promise, but for a pay-out, and for shot at dwindling into Tom's wife. Since she gave up the hope of anyone casting her in another role, she takes the one that's left.

[nikofortuna]

JTTW Chapter 9 Thoughts

Chapter Nine for the @journeythroughjourneytothewest Reading Group! TW: mention of suicide under the cut, so the same as the actual chapter.

There is a lot of openly crying in this one! By men too, which is very refreshing to read compared to a bunch of modern stuff.

First up I do quite like how government officials aren’t necessarily chosen through nepotism or the like, but instead everyone genuinely has to study so when they become an official they have already proven smart and also have a good amount of knowledge to do their work well. Additionally theoretically everyone has a chance to get a government position as they aren’t barred by status from studying and taking the exam. It’s not a perfect system by all means, but it’s pretty decent all things considered!

Chen Guangrui had the fastest meet-cute to marriage ever, huh. He’s really chill with it too and I suppose this was somewhat common back then. Though for the comedy of it I can imagine him with a bunch of question marks around his head when he gets hit with the ball and led inside the residence. Was he considering that he got knocked out by that ball and dreaming this at any point? Probably not, but it’s still amusing to consider.

Scientific accuracies abound! A fish or snake blinking would indeed be a sign of them being extraordinary, because neither should be able to blink! They don’t have movable eyelids.

A few interesting notes from the German translation. The Hong River or Hongjiang [洪江] literally translates to ‘flooding river’ and the relation to water may implicate the flow of live and destiny. Also Liu Hong has the same character for Hong in his name as the river! Symbolically he ‘floods’ the family’s life with misfortune.

The J.F. Jenner translation calls the incense ring a sandalwood bracelet and so does the German translation, which is rather neat. While the original Chinese doesn’t specify sandalwood from what I could gather, this kind of wood can indeed be used for incense so it does make sense in that regard. Plus it ties back into Xuanzang later! I assume that is why they chose to translate it that way.

Though I find it a little bit suspicious, perhaps a little shellfish, that the Dragon King just keeps Chen Guangrui to work for him without even checking in with his family at all let alone making sure that they are fine, but essentially just leaving them to suffer. He knows they are in trouble because of the bandits too! So he really has no excuse there.

Poor Yin Wenjiao had to have some serious mental health problems after the whole ordeal that happened to her, otherwise her taking the out after all makes no sense. Nobody blames her for anything, which they openly and clearly communicated to her, and she technically gets back everything that had been taken from her down to her husband which is a legit miracle.

She mentioned before that she wanted to atone for things to her husband by ending her life, but I doubt her husband now alive again would have ever signed off on that, so this had to have been at least partially an excuse in her mind from the start.

This ending was actually omitted from the German translation! In there it basically just says she lived happily ever after, which I might actually prefer simply due to how little the book delves into Yin Wenjiao’s psyche and kind of just waves her away in that regard.

Lastly Sun Wukong continues to feel like the main character in comparison to the scripture pilgrim. This chapter was more a backstory of Xuanzang’s family, but not as much of himself. Meanwhile Sun Wukong was at the centre of his multi-chapter backstory at every turn.

[transformersimagines]

Poetry Night

This is another part of this post. I would go there first for more context.

I also want to note I’m writing this from your perspective (obviously), so you’re operating on whatever information they’ve given you beforehand. No meta-shit. I'm not going to be using terms we know as a fandom.

Now I want to note that their real names are not… 'conventional' human names. In the real world if someone told you their name is 'Megatron' it would definitely have you questioning things.  In this instance, Megatron almost told you his real name when y'all first met.

You both ended up at the same high-top table in a local bar when it was packed on stand-up comedy night. You ended up chatting throughout the night and enjoying each other company. Right at the end you exchanged names. Megatron almost said his real name but caught himself partway through. This left you thinking his name is Meg, which you don’t want to judge so you just accepted it and moved on.

So there is some context, back to the one-shot. Hope you enjoy it.

“Hey Megs!” You wave from your hightop once you spot him walking through the front door. His eyes instantly lock on you, a small smile on his face as he pushes past the people at the bar.

“Good evening (Y/n).” Meg greets taking a seat across from you.

“I know I sound like a broken record by now, but are you sure you don’t want a drink? My treat.” You tap your own drink. He shakes his head, another 'no.' Exactly what you expected. You haven’t seen him get a drink here for as long as you’ve known him. Actually… you don’t think you’ve ever seen him eat or drink anything at all this entire time, even on your lunch/dinner dates.

You are pulled from your thoughts as a member of the bar staff steps onto the stage, greeting everyone and explaining how everything will work tonight.

“It is poetry night, think you’ll finally read something of yours?” You question, turning your full attention to Meg.

“I think I’ll keep those to myself still. They don’t feel done yet.” Meg surveys the crowd as the first person steps on stage, notebook in hand.

“I read somewhere online that- God how did it go again?” You try to unscramble your thoughts, desperately looking for this quote. You could hear Meg chuckling across from you. You smacked his arm, a stern look on your face. It doesn’t last long before you're laughing with him at your own actions.  

“I just know if I stumble through it, it won't sound as inspiring.” You mumble. Applause starts up in the bar as the first person exits the stage. You and Meg start clapping along with everyone.

“I’m sure you would inspire me either way.” Meg offers. You sigh, have you stopped smiling since he arrived? I don’t think so.

“Well, it was something about how art will always be unfinished until it is seen or experienced by someone.” You looked mindlessly into the crowd as you pulled the quote together the best you could. It definitely didn't flow as well as you remember it. When you looked back at Meg he was completely focused on you, a soft smile that undoubtedly caused your cheeks to warm.

“Very elegantly put.” You roll your eyes, waving off the compliment. You turn to the stage to hide your obvious blush.  

“If I find the actual quote I’ll text it to you.”

You both chat back and forth about anything and everything you could think of. Occasionally discussing a poem after it was read, but mostly hopping from topic to topic. One moment it was about your work, then hobby updates, and you even ended up somewhat planning the next get-together. What breaks you out of everything is the young man who introduces himself on the stage. You don’t remember the title of his work, only that it caught your attention. He doesn't say anything more and simply starts reading.  

“The whole body is a heart, The whole heart supplies the body, Never secure the truth with a lie, For lies corrupt the whole, Foundation should be solid and pure, Every truth from a liar is void, Here now lays ruins, the body aches, The heart is sore with its echoes. Never built what is true with lies, lies will rot the beauty”

Applause followed as the man did a short bow as he exited the stage. Once he steps off you pull yourself back to the present turning to your drink and giving it a quick spin.

“Now that one seemed to stick with you.” You look up at Meg, he didn’t look curious with a touch of concern.

“Anyone could relate to that. I’m sure everyone has a vendetta against lies. Broken trust and everything that comes with lying.” You smile at Meg, reaching forward and placing a hand on his arm leaning against the table. “I’m just glad to have people in my life I trust.”

Meg looked momentarily uncomfortable at your comment. It was definitely not what you expected as a reaction.

The rest of the night continued as normal, the night got louder and louder as the sun slowly dipped behind the surrounding buildings and the stars started sparkling in the sky. You step outside and are hit with a gust of cold air.

“That was a great night, I know we talked about doing a movie night next. I can text you a date once I figure out my schedule. I was thinking we could just do it at my apartment. I’ve got nearly every streaming service so I’m sure we can find something to watch.” You turn to Meg and he doesn't seem completely in the conversation. He seemed to be lost in thought.

“That sounds great. I’ll be looking forward to your message.” He stops short. It sounds like he was about to say more so you wait. That is until another gust of wind blows past you chilling you to the bone.

‘Well, I’ll talk to you later…” You shiver, turning toward the parking lot. A hand grabs your arm before you're able to take a step.

“I actually wanted to show you… something important.” He seemed hesitant, definitely nervous. Where did all his confidence go? “Unless you have somewhere you need to be, I completely understand that.” He adds quickly.

“No.” You respond. The only thing you really had going on was a hot shower and some warm blankets. Meg looks startled at your answer and a little disappointed.

“I meant ‘no’ as in I don’t have anything else going on tonight!” You add quickly.  “What do you want to show me?”

“It'll be easier to just explain it all in person.” He answers, taking a step in the other direction, holding out a hand to you. You grab his hand and move to walk closely next to him. Eventually, you end up clinging to his arm trying to hide from the wind.

You walk in silence for a bit, moving away from the social district. The buildings around you were getting bigger and there were fewer lights around. How long had we been walking in this direction?

“(Y/n)?”

“Hmmm?” You answer, continuing to look around the two of you. When was the last time you saw someone drive by?

“I know we’ve known each other for a short amount of time-” Meg starts.

“We are almost at a year, that's a pretty long time in my book!” You cut in, slightly offended. Meg freezes for a moment before bursting into laughter.

“Y-you’re right! I always seem to forget that time passes differently here.”

“I’m pretty sure time passes the same everywhere. Or are you referring to time zones?”

“What I was trying to get to, was that the time we’ve spent together has been… easy.” Meg looks down at you hugging his arm, still hiding from the wind as best you can. “You are an incredible individual.”

“I can’t take all that credit,” You hide your face with your hand, feeling the heat creep back into your cheeks, “being with you has been, freeing. I’m just able to be myself with you. You are insanely insightful, guess that's why you're a writer”

“I’m not just a writer, (Y/n). There are some parts of me I haven’t shared with you. I… never planned to share it with you. Until now”

“Wha-” Your cut off when Meg stops, causing you to stumble forward. You look around and don’t see anything. It was just a warehouse of some sort.

“(Y/n), I want to show you who I am. I don’t want our foundation to be built on a lie. Cause I have lied to you about a fundamental part of myself.” Meg slips his arm from you and steps back towards the metal garage door we stopped in front of. You don’t move, looking around your surroundings. There was no one anywhere, the street lights were the only real light and they were sparse on this street. 

“Meg, I’m not going to lie, I’m a little… scared right now.” You wanted to be honest. He was trying to be honest, but this was confusing you.

“You don’t have to be scared, (Y/n). Believe me, nothing can hurt you when I’m here. I want to deserve the trust you have in me.” He sounded desperate, pleading with you. He had opened the garage, holding it open above him. It was dark inside the building.

“Okay.” You didn’t know how else to respond. He sounded genuine, and you’ve never felt in danger around him. If anything you felt untouchable, completely safe. 

Meg led you inside the building shutting the gate behind you. It was completely dark one second then the next it was incredibly bright. You shield your eyes until they can adjust fully.  What you saw wasn’t anything you could have expected.

It looked incredibly futuristic. Insanely huge screens are set up on a catwalk Meg is leading you towards. A lot was going on in the room you didn’t understand, but what really caught your attention was what was in the center of the room. 

“Is that a fucking tank?!” You point, leaning against the rail of the catwalk. “Are you a spy or something? Why do you need screens that big? What's that-?”

“(Y/n), I will explain everything. Why don’t you take a seat.” You're at the top of the catwalk now, there's a small metal table with a single chair next to it. You take a seat, jittering slightly as you look around the room still.  This was a bit overwhelming. 

“(Y/n), this may be a bit hard to understand right away, but just let me finish and then you can ask me whatever you want.” He looked extremely nervous, especially when you turned your focus completely on him. 

“I promise Megs, you have the floor. I will not say anything until you're done.” 

“Thank you.” He stands there and just looks around the room. He must be figuring out what to explain first. You hope he starts with the tank. That is what you had the most questions about. 

“I’m… not human.” Your mouth hangs open, that was not what you expected to hear. You desperately wanted to say something, demand he explain himself, but you snap your jaw shut. You promised you would wait, and that's just what you would do. You watch as Meg relaxes instantly, he was definitely still nervous, but at least he didn’t look like he was bordering on a panic attack now. 

“I hail from the planet Cybertron. I was the leader of the Decepticons involved in an intergalactic war against the Autobots. The war is over now, for some bots anyway. I'm a member of the Autobots now too. I've been traveling on the ship the LostLight with-” He was starting to ramble, and the more he was saying the less you understood. You could feel your heart start to race and your head was starting to hurt as you desperately tried to keep up with what he was saying.  

“Megs…” You whisper. You didn’t want to cut him off, but you were completely lost. Meg stopped mid-rant. Your confusion and distress must be clear on your face cause he seemed to recollect his thoughts. 

“That’s not important right now. I need to start with the basics like my name. It's not Meg, my full name is Megatron.”

Megatron. I guess you weren’t wrong about his name being “foreign,” you just didn’t expect it to be alien-foreign. 

“And… this is not what I look like.” He gestures to himself. “This is not me.” At that moment he completely disappears. You shoot up from your seat and look around. 

“Megatron?” You tested the name. It suited him way more than ‘Meg.’ 

The sound of metal moving catches your attention and you watch as the tank changes and shifts into a giant robot. You stumble back until you hit the table staring up into his red eyes. 

“This is what I actually look like, (Y/n).” It was definitely his voice, but now it was everywhere around you. You never look away and reach blindly for the chair. Once you found it you sat back down. Did I drink more than I thought? Was I already home and this was some trippy dream? 

“(Y/n)-” You hold up your hand to stop him. 

“I’m just… processing… Megatron.” You look anywhere else but at him, “I’m just a bit overwhelmed right now.” 

“Understandable.”  There’s a long silence where no one moves or speaks. What finally breaks the silence is your heavy sigh. 

"So aliens are real?"

"Yes"

"And your and alien?"

"Yes"

"From Cyba..."

"Cybertron"

"Yes, there. And you're just, hanging out on Earth?"

"That's a bit of a long story." Megatron trails off.

"Good thing I don't have work tomorrow."

If you can image it, this was even longer than Ratchet’s one-shot. Let me know what you think, I am always down to interact. And my Asks are open.

Also here is the link to the Poem in this one-shot (cause you wont catch me NOT citing my sources). I just grabbed the first one that fit what I needed, nothing too deep lol. I read fanfiction and smut, nothing as sophisticated as poetry.  

[bdzonthareel]

Barbie

When I first heard about a Barbie movie, I like many people rolled their eyes at the very thought of it. Barbie media has often (at times unfairly) lambasted for being a cash grab and that was my initial reaction, however we I heard that Margot Robbie was involved and her production company was fitting the bill, my interest was piqued. So without further ado, (and I never thought I would ever say these words) let’s talk about Barbie!

We’re introduced to the fictional world of Barbieland, where every concept of Barbie exists and lives in perfect harmony with a respective Ken, and Allan (there’s only one of him.) But the harmony is disrupted when Robbie’s Stereotypical Barbie begins to suffer from an existential crisis and in order for her to fix what’s wrong she must go to the real world and meet the girl who is playing with her and figure out what’s wrong.

In all genres of entertainment, comedy is one of those that I am insanely harsh on, as comedian myself I feel like there should be a flow to long form story, especially in comedy. But I can say that Director and co-screenwriter Greta Gerwig created a work that was heartfelt and hilarious in this film.

The cinematography is nothing short of brilliant, lots and lots of pink paint was used to bring Barbieland to life and it felt like one massive play set. And the various Real World shots were not to be out done giving off a stark contrast to each other.

The soundtrack was a delightful mix of classic top 40s, newer hits and self-aware comedic songs. The score was equally light poppy and fun, composers (pop music legend) Mark Ronson and Andrew Wyatt brought an amazing upbeat energy to this film.

Co-writer Noah Baumbach, helped with some very well-timed jokes, and you know they worked because they triggered a metric ton of incels, and that alone was worth the price of admission. Together with Gerwig, I was throughly impressed with the amount of meta commentary on display, and despite what some might lead you to believe, the film doesn’t demonize men; the film’s message is far more complex than that. I also appreciate the fact that they made the movie about the titular character, with seems to be something that franchises like Transformers can’t seem to get right.

And the performances were hilariously well done, Margot Robbie and Ryan Gossling have great chemistry as they lampoon the ideas of these characters’ roles. Simu Liu, is amazing versatile and brings the same amazing timing that he brought to Kim’s Convenience and it was delightful. Although my favorite Barbies were Issa Rei as President Barbie and Sharon Rooney as Lawyer Barbie. And I would be remised to ignore Hari Nef whose Doctor Barbie was whimsical and charming, Also since I’m madly in love with Alexandra Shipp I can say that she another of my favorite parts. America Ferreira and Ariana Greenblat served as great moral support for the various inhabitants of Barbieland and then there Will Ferrell I was almost convinced was Ken at one point given his goofball behavior. I also enjoyed seeing Rhea Pearlman as one (spoilers), she just gets better with age. Kate McKinnon really went all in as Weird Barbie as did Michael Cera as Allan (easily my favorite character in the film.) And last but certainly NOT least, Dame Hellen Mirren as the narrator brought a nice touch of her

Barbie was more than what I and many others initially expected, it was packaged as a goofball fish-out-of-water comedy which is a tired cliché in its own right, I sat down on this for a good while before writing this and I feel like its one of the best comedies I have seen in a very long time. It was very funny, but it also had a lot to say about growing up, holding on to thing that we love, and letting go of them. The biggest message that we all have to find our own way, because we are all more than just an idea and life doesn’t exist in just a straight line and at the end of the day isn’t that what it means to be human?

I give Barbie a well-deserved, 5 out of 5.

[tgammsideblog]

Tgamm S1 Ep 12-A ¨Game Night¨ episode analysis

The Mcgees are up for house chores and it’s Scratch turn to clean the downstairs bathroom. While cleaning, Molly finds a game the family used to play together and Scratch decides to use this as a way to avoid doing his chores...

Episode writer: Peter Limm ¨Game Night¨ is one of those episodes that is centered in the daily life of the Mcgee family. In premise, this would seem like normal episode that there isn’t much going on, but thanks to the characterization and comedy, it success at being a great.

One aspect that this episode explores is Scratch not knowing how a normal family works. He is very surprised when he is given to do house chores. He assumes that being part of a family is ¨unconditional love¨ and there aren’t certain responsibilities one has to carry. Worth of noting that this is the first time he refers to himself as a ¨Mcgee¨ without struggling and having to hide it from others, where as he struggled admitting it in ¨The Greatest Concert Ever¨.I appreciate watching the series continuing this development of his by exploring the concept he has of a family and learning what it means to be part of one.

Because he doesn’t want to do his house chores, Scratch tries finding multiple ways to avoid his responsibility. After Molly finds out a game the Mcgees used to play, he uses that as an excuse to not do his chores. Later he challenges Molly, Darry and Pete, cheats in the game using his ghost powers and makes them do his cleaning duties. Just like ¨Not So Honest Abe¨ i like ¨Game Night¨ because it explores these darker side of Scratch’s personality. He acts very selfishly in this ocassion, even not winning fairly. He acts more as an antagonist, which honestly it is something i wouldn’t mind the show doing a bit more often. He is a genuine character when he is allowed to be rude and inconsiderate, in part thanks to Dana’s performance.

Another character that is great in here is Sharon. Most of the episode she is potrayed and refered to as someone who doesn’t know how to play the board game. She ¨always loses¨. She is the only one who tries doing the chores while everyone else is playing the game. When she finds out that Scratch cheated, she challenges him to another game, she against him. The moment they start playing it is revealed that she is really good at it and manages to beat Scratch even with him using his ghost powers. She later clarifies that she used to be a very dedicated player and won some tournaments but she always went easy on her family because of that. Just like ¨Ice Princess¨ revealed Pete used to be an ice skater, it was a nice twist this episode showing another side of Sharon’s character and a very competitive one too.

Seeing the Mcgees playing the game together and getting competitive is fun as well. I enjoy these episodes about them going through their daily routine and how they have to deal with their problems. ¨Game Night¨ works well as an introduction for someone who has never watched the series before because it doesn’t need much context to understand the plot. I also like how the concept of the game is introduced first and after seeing all that, Scratch uses it to trick the Mcgees into doing his chore. The events all correctly paced and they flow naturally without any rush.

The song sequence is... good. The song itself isn’t that memorable but it’s satisfactory to watch Sharon win the game and teaching Scratch a lesson the hard way during the process. While it isn’t one of my favourites, it’s fun to see.

On last point, Scratch and Pete share a small interaction near the end of the episode that involves Pete thanking Scratch for understanding that he has to do his part in the family and Scratch admits that it isn’t that bad. It’s a short moment that makes want to see more of this between these two characters.

In conclusion, Game Night is a great episode with good interactions, some good development for Scratch and a bit for Sharon. It’s simple yet very entertaining to watch. Solid memorable episode.

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 03/02/2024 (Megan Thee Stallion, Skepta, Justin Timberlake)

Noah Kahan’s at #1 with “Stick Season” for a fifth week, but lower down the chart, there’s a lot of nonsense going on, most of it involving female rappers. Welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

Rundown

As always, we start with the notable dropouts, songs exiting the UK Top 75, which is what I cover, after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40. This week, we bid adieu to “n.h.i.e.” by 21 Savage and Doja Cat, “Kool-Aid” by Bring Me the Horizon, “Strangers” AND “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi, “FTCU” by Nicki Minaj and “Disconnect” by Becky Hill and Chase & Status. Other than the last one, not really complaining much about these.

As for notable gains and returns, well, much of what’s of interest will come down to the new arrivals, and a lot of our gains are confined to within the top 40. Outside of that, we do see “When We Were Young (The Logical Song)” by David Guetta and Kim Petras back at #71 because that song refuses to have a coherent run. Then in the top 40, we see a lot of interesting pick-ups, some a bit surprising and most I’m also really not complaining about either, with “Scared to Start” by Michael Marcagi at #38, “Whatever” by Kygo and Ava Max at #27, “Nothing Matters” by The Last Dinner Party surging at #22 and I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s higher given the album this week, “Praise Jah in the Moonlight” by YG Marley up big at #20 and again, there’s a movie coming out that could boost this even higher in the coming weeks. Other than that, we see “Beautiful Things” by Benson Boone actually gaining off of the high debut last week at #11 and finally, Madonna gets her first top 10 since 2009 and Playboi Carti his first since, well, ever, as “Popular” with The Weeknd crawls its way to #10. I’m still surprised those two even have a song together.

Our top five should seem pretty standard: “yes, and?” by Ariana Grande loses steam at #5, “Lovin’ on Me” by Jack Harlow is steady at #4, “Lose Control” by Teddy Swims is on a surprising run at #3, then we have “Murder on the Dancefloor” by Sophie Ellis-Bextor at #2 and of course Mr. Kahan at the very top. Like I said, it’s much more interesting down below, and that’s naturally what we’ll focus on today. Now… stay with me.

New Entries

#75 - “Think U the Shit (Fart)” - Ice Spice

Produced by RIOTUSA, Synthetic and venny

This song makes me feel so old. I’ve missed out on the Ice Spice craze entirely in the first place, but I’d also never seen this meme she was referencing, hadn’t heard the viral snippet of the song, this is just entirely beyond me. There’s a quirky, you could argue jazzy set of 80s-sounding keys but it’s quickly drowned out by a thrusting 808 and the reverb-drowned vocal take from Ice Spice that really shows the limitations of her and RIOTUSA, given how she goes for such a basic flow all the time, and this is actually the most energy she’s ever given a performance… which is depressing! She has to fill in blank space with constant, unbothered ad-libs and punching in, and RIOT has made such a minimal rhythm section for much of the song that he seems to actively switch into a more recognisable trap beat just so Ice Spice doesn’t sound painfully out of place. As for content, you’re joking, what is there to it? I’d complain about she rhymed “fighting” with “Saiyan” but pronounced both words as expected so it straight up doesn’t rhyme at all, but that’s definitely just an element of her troll persona or whatever. I don’t know, any detail I can pick apart just feels so nulled by the fact that, well, it’s an Ice Spice song called “Think U the Shit (Fart)”. It’s basically novelty, comedy rap. Why should I try?

#61 - “Not My Fault” - Reneé Rapp and Megan Thee Stallion

Produced by Ryan Tedder, Alexander 23, Jasper Harris and Jeff Richmond

Ah, Megan Thee Stallion, I’m sure this is the last time this week I will have to talk about them. Sigh, this is embarrassingly the one time where I can say I have actually seen the contemporary film attached to the soundtrack single, and this was tacked onto the credits sequence, with Megan making two pointless cameos within a fun Pixarification of the original Mean Girls that I don’t think I’d ever watch again, but was still a fun, harmless time in the cinema. Now because I’m lame, there are songs from the film proper I much prefer but I don’t expect them to chart because 1.) they’re much further embedded into the musical tradition and 2.) they’re not produced by Ryan Tedder. Believe me, I checked. As much as I’m convinced by Ms. Rapp as an actor, as a singer, she has a lot to prove, not really showing how capable she could be in translating those acting skills to developing a true character in songwriting and performance a lá Olivia Rodrigo. This is a bratty disco-pop song that acts as a bit of a mean girl anthem so to speak, but is completely toothless, including the kind of embarrassing Megan verse that will date the song even further than its dated-on-arrival concept, although I at least like the consistency of the references - she has been calling herself the “black Regina George” since 2017. The song overall is just a reflection of a semi-failed conglomerate project, it’s ephemeral and serves no purpose other than to end up being a time capsule one looks upon 20 years from now questioning what the zeitgeist was in 2024, much like how we now look at the original Mean Girls for 2004 which, by the way, is directly sampled in this song, instead of the same line from the new film… which makes me think they hadn’t even shot the film by the time this song was made. Keeping it professional, Paramount.

#56 - “Big Foot” - Nicki Minaj

Produced by Tate Kobang and ZellTooTrill

The worst thing about rap beef, to me, is that the newer diss, if released the same week, will probably debut lower than the catalyst diss - the cata-diss, if you will - so I have to review the songs in reverse chronological order. It just doesn’t make sense, does it? With that said, it seems like a stretch to describe this as a song, not because it’s so terribly awful or anything, though I do notice that the song’s quality - or lack thereof - and pure antagonism has made some Barbs jumped ship. It’s more so because this is just a verse that starts off in a bizarre, unhinged Roman flow and ends with ASMR. I do think I have a pretty “no-holds-barred” attitude when it comes to feuds in hip hop as long as it doesn’t escalate to violence, so it’s not like I’m offended by anything Nicki said here, even if it gets ruthless and almost needlessly so, but it does just appear a bit desperate, attention-baiting using the villain persona. That’s not new for Nicki though, and all rap beef is villainised attention-baiting, often with flow and song structure as mostly if not entirely irrelevant factors. Therefore, I really can’t review this one, and no, I’m not ducking from Barbs because Pink Friday 2 is one of the worst albums I have ever heard, and I have long criticised Nicki for having bad music on this series, this just can’t really be treated as such. Sure, there’s a Detroit trap beat behind it, but only for half of the song’s runtime, and given how rushed-together it sounds, it’s clearly not a priority. I don’t review Instagram Live videos from gossip merchants, and I fail to see how this, given that it rarely ever criticises Megan’s standing as a rapper or public figure, more just using the same accusations Remy Ma threw at Nicki on “ShETHER” with a new coat of paint, is worth analysing as a piece of popular music and not just a social media rant… which Nicki has given plenty of in the past week, it’s been bizarroworld on Twitter. I will indeed hold that same standard for Megan coming up as well.

#49 - “Grey” - Yung Filly

Produced by JuwonMix

Well, the vast majority of our debuts are from or involving rappers so it’s only fair that we have some UK representation this week, and… I’m not familiar with Yung Filly but I didn’t really expect an Afrobeats / dancehall track about how meaningless fame and success can be. To be honest, that seems like it’s mostly the subtext rather than the text, coming mostly in prominence in that melancholy chorus but the song definitely sounds like the colour of its title given the bouncy percussion not doing a great job at hiding the stray reggae chords or blasts of trumpet that seem to put a noir downer on the whole parade, especially considering his longing, monotone delivery that fits into a tight pocket but never actively, almost like he just slides into it and happens to be on the beat rather than any conscious effort to ride it. That’s not to say the vocals are smooth, or not good, they’re surprisingly emotive for an Auto-Tune crooner yet also somewhat staccato in places, it’s a nuanced performance. I don’t really have much left to say, it’s not exactly a complex song, but it’s honestly surprisingly good, would absolutely not mind if this stuck around.

#37 - “Selfish” - Justin Timberlake

Produced by Justin Timberlake, Louis Bell and Cirkut

No, you can’t get back from this. We all heard “Filthy” back in 2018. Whenever I think of Justin Timberlake, I don’t just think of the classics, “SexyBack”, “Cry Me a River”, “Suit and Tie”, *NSYNC, I think of “Filthy” and this will poison the well of Justin Timberlake discourse for as long as he continues to release music because no man should be able to release “Filthy” and stand untested. In fact, I don’t give a shit about this new song, let’s talk about “Filthy” because what is that?! Who starts off the rollout for their woodsy, back-to-basics country-pop album with a dramatic glam-rock curtain call diminishing itself into a squelchy “funk” (stretching the use of the word) coated with female moaning and wonky-influenced production that allows for Justin to just bring all his effortless swagger, right? Right? Oh, he’s just going to list off a bunch of 90s hip-hop references for some reason, as if that in his view emulates actually being cool and sexy. The lyrics are rife for analysis in their failure to succeed in just about anything other than make a fool out of the lead artist, and it is fascinating. The song ends with his wife delivering spoken word over ambient, for God’s sake. I respect it, though. I respect taking a risk - or 10 - in a lead single. I don’t respect calling up Post Malone’s production crew to get an easy white-boy pop hit, rejecting pretty much every element of your sound that people were drawn into, AKA Timbaland, Pharrell and Danja, just for the safety of your own flailing career. Justin, you’ve still got Mickey Mouse money left over, let alone the incredibly storied and successful career from then on, and that’s not including the Trolls cheques, which I can only imagine are insane. You do not need to do this, you really don’t. Have some dignity, Justin. You’re not The Kid LAROI. You’re a grown man. Do what you want to do, not what you feel you need to.

#32 - “Gas Me Up (Diligent)” - Skepta

Produced by Cardo and ThatGuyNamedJalen

You’re really under-selling yourself there, Jalen. Anyway, Skepta’s back and much like “Big Foot”, this is one long-form verse over a pretty standard, unmixed-sounding beat, making threats towards others, but there a few key differences that mean I’m a lot kinder to this: firstly, the cloud rap beat is thoroughly aquatic in its lead melody and even if I’d prefer the song keeps some of that underwater energy once the beat drops, the loud, cowbell-accentuated rhythm is still sick and Skepta rides it perfectly. He’s always been one of the smoothest rappers out of the UK, mostly because of how much he has become a student of American hip hop despite his grime origins, and here he shows those Stateside connections off with some of his best, least tacked-on singing performances yet but also a faster-paced blunt delivery for much of the verse that feels much more embedded into British flows and cadences. The content isn’t particularly intriguing for me at least, but the rhyme schemes are clean and his word choice seems very deliberate in order to present a very prestigious sounding set of bars. It’s not exactly Skepta’s best, and definitely not his most interesting, but it’s worth checking out regardless and I feel like he’s been laying low for a while so this seems like a promising comeback.

#31 - “HISS” - Megan Thee Stallion

Produced by LilJuMadeDaBeat, Bankroll Got It and Shawn “Source” Jarrett

Megan Thee Stallion is an independe nt artist nowadays, and her lead single with a switch in sound and massive video, “Cobra”, despite all the reach and pull that Megan has, the promo, the rock remix… it failed to chart in the top 75, a real shame because I think it’s excellent, and just unfortunate that drama and feuding is what lands Megan a top 40 debut. That’s not to say she wouldn’t have charted without Nicki’s free promo of the otherwise not really substantial song by causing such a fuss, but definitely not at #31. Now, there are elements of this song that make it much clearer that it was intended as a piece of music rather than a worthless gossip piece. Firstly, it came with a big video, it’s actually mixed with double-tracked vocals and a decent amount of care put into a still minimal Dirty South beat, as well as a consistent, catchy flow and aggressive delivery that I can appreciate. Even the spoken word elements are left to interludes instead of grand amounts of the song, and sometimes rhyme… but regardless, this is still not exactly introspective in any way, it’s not inward-looking, or even forward-looking really. It’s a hit-out at a lot of the unwarranted hatred that surrounds Megan or is directed towards her, but it’s still just her going through a hit-list of complaints and haters, keeping it relatively subliminal - as much as I don’t like “Big Foot”, at least she’s being upfront. This often feels like it could be about anyone, so the unloading of dirty laundry feels much more detached and therefore easy to stop caring about, and this isn’t just me avoiding making comments on the beef, I apply this same standard to, say, Doja Cat, whose song “Attention” and album Scarlet I complained about being too focused on her own drama, and I’ve held many similar grievances with male rappers like Jack Harlow and ESPECIALLY Kanye in the past. When you let out your problems with people on wax, hook me in first, don’t just assume I’m already listening.

Conclusion

What a week, huh? Yeah, Skepta gets Best of the Week, of course he does. “Gas Me Up (Diligent)” is probably the most realised song this week, even if generally, a lack of realisation and finishing touch seems to be a vague theme in this episode. It’s not the only good song though, Yung Filly takes the Honourable Mention for “Grey”, whilst Worst of the Week should be just as obvious as Skepta’s shoe-in was… no pun intended there. The Dishonourable Mention, of course, goes to Justin Timberlake for “Selfish” because, man, no one wants to hear this from you, JT. As for what’s on the horizon… who knows? That’s for future me to figure out. For now, thank you for reading and I know I keep saying this, but I may see you earlier than next week.

[tumblingxelian]

E6 - Confessions Within Cumulonimbus Clouds

CRWBY that title has implications.

Also oh snap flashing lights warning.  

Oh snap a first person Jaune flashback. 

He also landed in the beach. 

So he found a tree that grows clocks, took one and time starting flowing backwards, holy shit that was horrifying. 

Well snap there go any of my “He ascended” theories, he really did just stay there and build a house, that boy got lotsa new trauma. 

Also it seems Alyx didn’t arrive alone, there goes another theory. 

OK Little is there and so is Ruby. 

Not a fan of the shipping bait and the tone shift doesn’t really work in this instance. 

I like the discussion, Ruby & Weiss are clearly spiraling while Blake & Yang are more optimistic. Also I was a bit leery of older Jaune meaning he would get to take command so :/ 

Oh shit, Jaune doesn’t like CC. 

Ooooh no, (OO) 

Yikes this is getting very grim. 

Alyx had a brother, he was absorbed, it seems CC is not on our side, sad :( 

THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED!? 

Ponder storm, clever! 

See now that bit of comedy worked, poor Weiss XD 

aswdqwxqw3qwx Jaune don’t you try and drag the Bumbleby’s, youhave not the right XD 

How do we take the next step? 

Summer is in Ruby’s reflection, SUmmer is in Ruby’s reflection!!!! 

Penny is on Jaune’s mind, Atlas on Weiss, SUmmer on Ruby’s. 

Love the stylized story telling. 

Oof, sad Alyx is so different from what we expected, though it seems to maybe be partially the Harbalists fault? 

OK, but this is odd, cos CC didn’t want to go to the tree at first and needed to be bribed, so is Jaune slightly off base or was CC being coy? 

When we’re together on that platform, oh Blake you are so in love Also literalizing the barriers they were scared to cross, that’s one way to force development XD 

 Pfft, Yang you are terrible at flirting, its cute XD 

Expressive ears for the win. Cute ears, cute pose. 

WHAT IS THIS SONG, I NEED IT! 

Yang was not ready for this level of sincerity. 

The wind dying down as they share more and more, love it. 

THEY WERE SO CLOSE AAAAAAHHHH

Yang is afraid!!!!!!!! 

YEYEYYYYYEEEEEES!!!!!!!!!!!!

CINEMATRI, BEAUTDUL WORDS!!! 

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES YEEEEEEEEEEEEES! 

People were right! 

its so beautiful!

OK so I think Jaune was wrong about CC, cos it seems like it was CC’s uncertainty drawing them into the story. 

Also CC wants to go to Remnant, maybe Little can go to Remnant (OO) 

Was hoping Yang would be the one to lift her leg, but honestly I am so overjoyed right now I don’t care, this is so cute and casual and sweet I love it. 

Jaune has waited almost as long as us XD 

Jaune has Crescent Rose! 

THE FUCK IS IT DOING TO HER!? 

Well that’s ominous! 

[themovieblogonline]

They Cloned Tyrone - A Blaxploitation Delight with Stellar Chemistry

Juel Taylor's directorial debut in They Cloned Tyrone is an incredibly fun film. The movie highlights a perspective of America that is often either ignored or misunderstood. This genre-blending movie pays homage to the iconic Blaxploitation films of the 1970s while infusing a fresh and contemporary twist. With an all-star cast led by John Boyega, Teyonah Parris, and Jamie Foxx, the chemistry between these three is electrifying. As the intriguing plot reveals itself, we get pulled deeper into a world where identity, responsibility, and deception collide, leading to an unforgettable experience. The Good: In 'They Cloned Tyrone,' the acting chemistry between John Boyega, Teyonah Parris, and Jamie Foxx is tastier than macaroni and candy yams at Thanksgiving dinner - and believe me, I'm hungry for more! One of the film's undeniable highlights is the incredible acting chemistry between the stars of this movie. Boyega's portrayal of Fontaine is a little mind-blowing. The actor immerses himself in this role, disappearing into an abyss of talent and reemerges as the hypnotic character. Jamie Foxx delivers a character that's as funny and witty as any and gives us a hint of the kind of sketch comedy characters the actor was known for in the 90s with his character Slick Charles. Teyonah is sultry and witty making Yo-Yo not only hold her own but also a scene-stealing character. Kudos to first-time director Juel Taylor, who impressively serves up a delicious blend of blaxploitation elements with a fresh and easy-to-digest presentation. Walking away from the film, I found myself craving for more of its flavorful goodness, wishing it didn't end. The movie feels effortless and just seems very natural in its tone, structure, pacing, and delivery. I really can't say enough good things about how well this movie came together.   The story flows smoother than a fresh set of jheri curls, and that's a fact! What elevates the experience to another level is the seamless on-screen chemistry of our talented leads. It's remarkable how well they mesh together, especially considering they didn't even do rehearsals before filming. Their chemistry is a testament to their talent, making every scene crackle with energy and authenticity. This camaraderie adds an extra layer of enjoyment to this already delightful cinematic treat. As viewers, we get to witness the trio's journey uncovering a government conspiracy. This whole story is just s one big rollercoaster ride you're glad to be on. The Bad: While 'They Cloned Tyrone' nails many aspects, the film's ending leaves a bit to be desired. The last act of the film, while ultimately satisfying, isn't without issues. The idea of Isaac, Fontaine's drug dealing gang rival, suddenly switching sides to lend a helping hand feels somewhat forced. Like, what is the motivation for his sudden change of heart? A more natural transition would have given the story a stronger impact, but it doesn't ruin the film. There is a lot to enjoy for audiences who love to see an Avengers Endgame moment where the heroes all band together to take down the big bad of the movie. Kiefer Sutherland's character is both entertaining and perplexing. His mood swings between merciful and ruthless, all while desperately seeking power and attention. left me questioning his true intentions. It's like he's a rollercoaster of personality traits, which can be a bit disorienting for the audience. This erratic nature makes it challenging to fully grasp his motivations, and at times, it pulls me out of the experience. Regardless, Sutherland's performance is still enjoyable, adding an interesting layer to the narrative.   Overall: 'They Cloned Tyrone' stands as a delightful tribute to the blaxploitation genre while introducing a fresh perspective that leaves audiences eagerly anticipating what the future holds for this unique universe. Whether you're a fan of blaxploitation films or simply seeking an entertaining and immersive cinematic experience, this film delivers on all fronts. Get ready to be swept away by the charisma of John Boyega, Teyonah Parris, and Jamie Foxx as they navigate a world of cloning and government conspiracies. Despite the minor hiccups, 'They Cloned Tyrone' is a must-watch until the very end. Stick around to learn the meaning of the title and discover how the movie sets up potential sequels. Whether you're a fan of the genre or just looking for an entertaining time at home, 'They Cloned Tyrone' delivers a fun experience that's worth a full watch. Its innovative blend of blaxploitation charm, satirical humor, and outstanding chemistry among the leads is a recipe for success. The movie leaves you hungry for more adventures in this intriguing world, prompting you to stay until the credits roll to unveil the significance of the title and the potential for sequels. Read the full article

[514ko]

YNaM Retrospectives - Chap. I

         Welcome, welcome~  To inaugurate my own little corner of the internet, I thought I’d do a series of retrospectives—just me leisurely rereading each chapter of my ongoing KoiFlan longfic, You’re Not a Monster, and giving some extra thoughts or background to things!

         Here’s a link to the first chapter in question, if you want the context:

          So first off, it’s very strange coming back to the first few scenes of YNaM, about two-and-a-half years after I first wrote them (I originally drafted them in Jan. 2021).  I don’t remember everything, but I do remember enough to write this post.

          I also remember being incredibly preoccupied with that first scene, for better or for worse.  In a bunch of ways, it was the scene that informed what would become YNaM—from writing style, to headcanons, to tone.  It’s got a lot of weight to bear too—it has to be interesting enough to serve as a hook, but also be emotionally flat enough to get across poor Flan’s starting emotional state.  Even the emotion that’s there was meant to feel kind of muted, coming from a place of hollowness or depression, something only broken by Flan’s own little daydream (just before Sakuya enters).  I don’t think I got it quite right, since the pacing’s super wonky and the flow reads weird to me now, but that’s what I was going for.

          Obviously, Flandre leads a lonely existence—we’ve known that for 20 years.  But the idea that she isn’t actually trapped down there is a super intriguing one to me—how does she deal with it?

          In my headcanon, Flandre deals with it by simply living in her head.  She’s alone, feels alone, has always felt alone (even though it’s not technicallytrue).  But she doesn’t necessarily feel lonely, just…empty.  She doesn’t leave the basement, doesn’t seek companionship or actual friendship.  Her time in utter isolation has permanently warped the way she thinks and acts into a sort of childish egocentrism—a learned helplessness, if you will—despite otherwise being basically a teenager/young adult.  That’s the sort of feeling I had in my head when editing that first scene (and indeed, the whole chapter), and I tried my best to convey it, but I probably failed at it…!  But that’s okay, all a learning experience~

          The second scene was one of my early attempts at physical comedy, as well as the first appearance of one of my favorite headcanons—Flandre’s long scarlet nails!!  I like long nails, both on characters and myself, so it’s more of a personal headcanon (that a lot of people agree with, judging by Flanart).  And it really does make wearing gloves a pain though~  But that’s okay, Flan’s got sharp magic nails so she’s immune to them hurting lol

          And the third is scene is just me setting up the Remi conflict that drives the first few chapters (I still really like the banter between the Scarlets tho).  Here’s a fun fact for you—in the original drafts, Remi didn’t even really appear in the first few chapters!  Those original drafts (written in Jan/Feb 2021), called You’re Not Her, were fully complete at 33k words—we’re already past that on YNaM, and we've still got a lot to go~  Basically, the plot in YNH was paced so lightning fast that it just had so many holes, and so I fixed one of those holes with the Remi subplot.  One of those big early problems was character agency, and not for nothing, it’s super difficult giving agency to a character who wants to do nothing but lay in her bed and daydream all the time… 

          From a purely mechanical point of view, it’s why the structure of Touhou is the way it is—the whole “resolving incidents” structure of each Touhou game gives the protagonists that agency organically, so there’s always forward momentum in the story.  The way ZUN’s set it up, if something weird goes down in Gensokyo, Reimu and Marisa are gonna get to the bottom of it, without fail (okay, almost without fail).

          Rereading my little Remi-fix, though, I do still suspect that Flandre’s reaction to Remi’s party comes off as melodramatic.  Especially for a first chapter.  I tried to cloak it in a “straw that broke the camel’s back”-type feeling, as well as playing up the deceptive part of Remi’s actions, yet the melodramatic tinge still remains.

          At the same time, I’m not quite sure what I’d do to remedy the feeling?  I mean, I dunno—I’d hope that Flan’s outburst feels in character for her to do?  Flan’s kind of anxiety-ridden and edgy, and she’s at rock-bottom as a person, and Remi did try to force her into it…  So Flan got pissed.

          Basically, I’m sure a more elegant solution exists, but alas—it’s one I can’t see.

          So yeah!  That’s everything I have on Chap. I, I think.  I had fun doing this; hope you got a kick out of it too! Still not too sure what to do with this space yet, but I'll figure something out eventually~

[deadmandairyland]

Considering starting The Fog Cutters over from the beginning but I’m not sure what the etiquette is for starting a fic over on AO3. Currently thinking that I should add a new chapter telling people that I’m going to start the fic over and why, but I don’t know how people feel about that kind of thing. Though I think it’s better than saying nothing.

For the record, here are my current thoughts on why I want to start the fic over:

I’m not a fan of how it’s going so far. I want to at least revise it and make it more well-rounded. (I feel like I’m focusing too much on comedy right now and I want it to just have some comedy, some serious, etc.)

I want to focus on world-building a bit more, which is something I feel the fic is lacking. Though the story takes place in an established city in the Danganronpa universe, I’m reworking the city as a “Japanamerica” type setting, so it’s not 1-to-1 with the official depiction of the city and should be treated as such.

Longer fic projects like this, in my personal opinion, benefit from the story being written in a way where you write the characters as if the reader has never heard of the character before. This is especially important in my fic because it’s a massive crossover fic, so there’s a good chance that there may actually be some characters the reader doesn’t know anything about.

I’m still not confident in my ability to write mysteries, so I want to look more into that.

I feel like I’m just hitting bullet points rather than telling a properly flowing story, which is something I need to work on in my writing in general.

Ironically I also feel like I haven’t planned the bullet points out very well either. I had a much more concrete outline with Despair Imitator and I’m mostly okay with how that turned out, and I think I need to plan this fic out a lot better too if I want it to work.

Fukawa deserved better than how I’ve written her tbh

I am also considering maybe splitting it up into separate fics that follow an overall story arc and combining them in a series. This would resolve a few problems that I’m worried about:

The new tag limit. By splitting up the arcs into separate fics I won’t have to worry as much about having too many tags per fic.

Longer fics in general can be pretty overwhelming to get into if it’s not broken up, I think. I know I sometimes see 100 chapter fics on AO3 and I get overwhelmed just looking at that, and I feel like doing it this way will make the series feel more accessible.

The arcs I have in mind are mostly episodic, so if you don’t like one arc, you probably wouldn’t miss much if you skip it (and if it’s super important to the plot as a whole I’ll probably mention that it’s an important arc in the author’s notes anyway), and it’d be easier to skip those arcs this way.

Related to the above, if I decide to add some lemon-lime to this... insert food analogy here, I feel like it’d be easier to notice and skip because you’d see a change in rating and new tags with sexy words and be like “I think I’ll go to the next one.”

So what I’m thinking of doing, if I decide to go through with this, is updating the fic with a message saying I want to start the fic over, and then when/if the new fic is ready to post I will delete the old one and start a new one. But I’d like to know if this is a good idea. Personally I would feel weird about just removing the chapters and just revising it because the hits, kudos...es, and bookmarks would reflect the old fic, not the new one. But if there’s some kind of issue like a waste of bandwidth or something that might be a problem, or if it’s just considered rude for some reason, please let me know before I make any changes.