#also tara. it would be so much fun to see how her being black and specifically darkskin plays into her perfectionism

[indi-glo-archive]

this is a good time for all of us to remember when I said I would be ready to sing the show's praises if it got better at the things i disliked it for

[holdmytesseract]

Ella being fascinated with the idea that baby Narfi is in her mom’s tummy because she doesn’t quite understand but she loves it nonetheless & talks to the tummy all the time

Tummy Talkin'

☆ The Baby Fever AU ☆

Ella feat. Loki x Y/N

Summary: Ella discovers how much fun it is, to talk to her little sibling in your tummy.

Warnings: fluuuff! pregnancy things, short talks of nightmares, Loki being the best dad ever

Word Count: 1,5k

a/n: @aagn360 thank you so much for requesting this! 🥰 It was so much fun to write! 🥰 Also, I loved bringing the lullaby back! 😁

Baby Fever Crew: Tagging y'all in the comments!

Baby Fever Masterlist °☆• Masterlist

"So, uh... My little sibling is in there, mommy?" Ella asked you, pointing at the small bump which was yours and Loki's second baby. It was sleeping time for the little girl, and you had just tucked her in - well... Halfway. She was rather sitting in her bed than laying.

Today was your turn with reading a story to her, and Ella seemingly jumped at the chance, since you had just started to show properly now.

You nodded; ran a hand through her wild black curls. "Yes, princess. Your little sibling is inside there." She literally stared at your belly; utterly fascinated. "How did she get inside your tummy?" Ella asked then; convinced that her baby sibling was going to be a girl. You smiled at the question, shaking your head. "This is just how it is. Human nature, sweetie. Just like with animals. Remember, when Tara's cat became a mommy of super sweet kittens? They were in her tummy as well." That didn't answer your daughter's question. Well, at least not precisely, but... She was still a child, and probably a bit too young for the whole truth.

Ella nodded, but frowned. "But... Mommy... What about birds? Their babies are in eggs." Welp... Good point, you thought. "That's right, Ella. It's because they aren't mammals - but you are going to learn that in school someday." To your luck, the little girl was satisfied with that answer. "Okay... I can't wait to learn it!" You smiled and leaned down to press a lingering kiss on her forehead.

"Sweetheart, it's time for your bedtime story now. It's getting late... Go, get comfy." Ella just smiled and nodded, before she laid down and got comfortable. You smiled again, pulled the covers tightly over her body; tucking her properly in. You reached for the book on her nightstand - a fairytale book, and opened it. "Now... Where were we?" You flipped through the pages, until you found the bookmark on the page where Loki had stopped yesterday. "Ah! I see..." You cleared your throat and began to read.

Ella slept in quite quickly. Only about fifteen minutes later, you tiptoed out of her room and down the hallway, to join Loki on the sofa in the living room.

"She asleep?" You nodded and plopped down on the sofa - straight into your husband's arms. "Mhm. Out like a light." Loki smiled softly - as you could see from the corner of your eyes, and pressed a kiss against your temple. "Good."

He pulled you tighter against him; cuddling you closer. "What would you wish to do with the rest of this beautiful evening, my queen?" He whispered close to your ear, causing a pleasant shiver to run down your spine. "Not much, actually. Can... Can you just cuddle me, please?"

Loki's expression went soft - which you were unable to see. "Of course, my love. Come here." The god pulled you once again closer - if that was even possible. While one arm held you securely pinned against his chest, the other arm sneaked around your hips; palm landing on your tiny baby bump. His thumb traced soft circles into the clothed skin. "Everything alright in there?" Loki asked in a low voice, with his face buried in your hair and neck. He always asked. At least once a day. Even though he knew, that you actually couldn't quite tell. One thing was certain, though... Loki couldn't wait to be able to really feel the child, which was growing in the safety of your womb.

"I'd say yes, babe." He took a deep breath, "Good. That's reassuring to know." and inhaled your scent. "I'm going to fully trust your motherly instincts in this one." You turned your head, in order to smile at him. "Me too." Your lips found his then; kissing him softly. It was a bit of an awkward angle, but that didn't stop neither you, nor Loki.

About two hours later - it was already close to midnight; the two of you were laying in bed. Loki was reading a book and you were on your phone, playing Candy Crush. It was a cosy, quiet atmosphere you and also Loki visibly enjoyed. Not for long, though... You didn't even make it to finish five levels, when you heard small footsteps outside the door of the bedroom, trying to be as quiet as possible. Ella? Why was she awake? You hadn't the time to think of it further, when a gentle knock sounded against the wooden door.

"Mommy? Daddy?" Her quiet, but audibly quivering voice caught both, you and Loki's attention. "Come in, sweetheart!" You immediately called, after sharing a slightly concerned gaze with your husband. The door opened slowly; only to reveal your shaking, little girl, clutching her blankie in her hands. Her eyes were a bit red and puffy and a tear was rolling down the apple of her cheek.

"What happened, princess?" Loki asked alarmed, putting aside his book. "Why are you crying?" Ella wiped the tear away. "Had a nightmare... Can I... Can I, uh, sleep with you?" Your expression softened. "Aw oh no, I'm sorry, sweetie. Of course, you can sleep with us." Loki nodded, "Absolutely." and already scooted over to create more space for your daughter. A small smile spread on the girl's face. She closed the door and quickly hurried over to join you and her father. But instead of laying in between the two of you, she immediately cuddled against Loki; letting herself engulfed by his strong arms. Daddy's girl, you thought with a smile. It is how it is.

Loki peppered her head with soft kisses, all the while just holding her; giving her the feeling of safety and protection. "Can you remember what it was about, princess?" Ella shook her head. "Nu.Uh." "That's good. It can't bother you further then."

A few more shed tears later, Ella had calmed down again and was way more relaxed - although couldn't sleep. Loki had an idea, though. "Shall I sing you the lullaby you always loved as a baby?" "Oh, I think that's a great idea, what do you think, sweetheart?" You agreed, smiling at your family. You had placed your phone aside by now as well. "Uh.Huh. You can try, daddy." Loki nodded. "Alright then. Let's see, if it is still able to lull you to sleep." The god cleared his throat and began to sing...

"Men trærne de danser og fossene stanser. Når hun synger, hun synger 'kom hjem'. Men trærne de danser og fossene stanser. Når hun synger, hun synger 'kom hjem'. I stormsvarte fjell, jeg vandrer alene, over isbreer tar jeg meg frem." Ella pulled the blanket she shared with her dad closer, while Loki continued the lullaby he knew so well.

"I eplehagen står møyen den vene og synger, 'Når kommer du hjem?'. Men trærne de danser og fossene stanser. Når hun synger, hun synger 'kom hjem'. Men trærne de danser og fossene stanser. Når hun synger, hun synger 'kom hjem'." He ended the song with a soft hum. With a smile, he ascertained that he was indeed successful. His lullaby had lulled someone to sleep - but not his daughter. Ella was still wide awake; was way too fascinated by the song. You had fallen asleep.

"Daddy, that was-" Loki interrupted the little with a finger on his lips, signalling her to be quiet. Ella didn't understand first, but then Loki nodded towards you. The girl turned and saw. "Ohh, mommy's asleep," she whispered, then giggled. "Your lullaby helped!" A low, quiet chuckle rumbled through the god's chest. "Indeed, princess... But unfortunately, not you. You should've been the one to drift off to dreamland, but well... I'm not complaining. Mommy needs the rest." Ella shuffled closer to you. "Because of the baby?" Loki nodded. "Mhm, exactly."

The girl's eyes were settled on your sleeping frame. You were still laying on your side, facing your husband and daughter. Your breathing deep and even. The blanket ended around your hips; leaving your upper body to the pleasantly cool air of the bedroom. Your sleep t-shirt had somehow, someway slipped up on the way; exposing your stomach. Therefore, that you laid on your side, with your hands tucked underneath your head; the small baby bump was clearly visible.

"Do you think my sibling can hear us, daddy?" Loki smiled. "Oh, I am sure of it. Try it. Go say hi." Ella squeaked up quietly, but excitedly and scooted even closer to you. She then turned, laid on her tummy. Her face now mere inches away from your stomach. Loki couldn't help but giggle, before he turned as well; joining his daughter; feet dangling over the edge of the bed.

"Hi baby," Ella whispered to your bump, "I'm your big sister. Can you hear me?" and pressed her ear against the swell of your stomach. "And?" Asked Loki curiously. The little girl's eyes widened. "Mhm! The baby says hello!" Loki smiled as well, playing of course along. "Really? Hello, baby!" Ella giggled. "Baby says hi daddy!"

Ella and Loki kept on talking to the baby, until the little girl fell asleep. Loki then maneuvered her in between you and him, and went to sleep as well.

From that day on, Ella talked to your baby bump almost on a daily basis. She loved to do it - and you thought it was just the sweetest thing ever.

[mostofthingsmostofthetime]

I finished the second episode of Heartstopper last night (wanted to post about it yesterday, but I was too tired from work), so here are some of my thoughts in no particular order for you now.

Good on Nick for checking up on Charlie after what happened. I found it odd, though, that he seemed more emotional about it than Charlie, but I guess they're in two very different places, mentally. One being 'why do I seem to like this guy way more than my other friends?' & the other being 'omg stop being so nice to me, your straight!' lol. Plus, I get that everyone deals with stuff in their own way & poor Charlie is probably so used to being mistreated that he might just be repressing the full weight of how his feeling as a copeing mechanism. It was also probably very cathartic to finally tell someone everything that happened between him & Ben (as I'm guessing he kept most if not all of it a secret from his friends & sister).

WE FINALLY MEET NELLIE!!!! And she is as cute as I'd hoped (though for some reason I expected her to be a different colour).

Sorry, Charlie, but Tori's right. Your hair looks exactly the same. Also, love that they kept the gag from the novel about her scaring him with her, always showing up suddenly without warning.

Nice to see that the outfits are on point for our boys so far with the plaid/black jeans (trying to impress someone, I see Charlie) & T-shirt/joggers (also what product is Miss Nelson using coz Nick's tops look soft as hell).

Wait, what season is it supposed to be because it looked really sunny when Charlie was walking to Nick's house (I know he was wearing a coat & hat but Charlie is always cold) but then suddenly it's snowing? Idk when Alice first came up with this story, but as a Brit, I haven't seen proper full on Snow since I was probably around eight years old. But hey, maybe in the Heartstopper universe, global warming doesn't exist.

I don’t care what anyone says, I will never get the fun of a snowball fight. If I go somewhere with a friend & they start throwing stuff at me, I'm leaving! Also, picking it up with your bare hands? One, it's been on the ground 🤢, and two, where are your gloves? Do you not feel the cold? Snow angles do look fun until I think about how my entire behind would be frozen/damp. Sorry if that makes me a "stick in the mud", I don't care 😝.

Damn, that is one photogenic dog & and aww, they already look like a couple. Also, give it up for Nick's freckles, the real star of the show 👏.

Omg, being in the same group as someone you hate must be so hard, but I get why Nick can't really say anything about what Ben did, at least not right now. Also, what is up with that Imogen girl? Mind your damn business.

I think it's good we get to see Elle longing for a bond with other girls that she just can't get from her male friend group. Makes her transition feel more fleshed out (for lack of a better word), you know?

Yay, we finally meet Tara & Darcy & they're exactly how I thought they'd be (except I imagined Darcy with brown hair for some reason). Ooh I didn't know Elle was artistic. I wanna decorate pencil cases now. Tara's pink puffa coat is so cute. What is up with adults dictating how long kids' hair can be? Like who gives a fuck! Also "gal pals" had me 😆.

Oh, thank god, it's just misinformation. For a second, I thought Tao was making shit up just to make Charlie get over his crush. Are kids really like that, though? I can't imagine kissing someone once & having people insist, I'm madly in love with them to this day, like move on already.

Ok, I officially really like the gay teacher, lol.

Love Charlie's sweater & Nick's coats are also very nice. Where are these kids getting their clothes? Coz I'm embarrassed by most of the stuff I wore as a teenager.

The big hoodie moment should be cute, but I just can't help thinking about how skinny Charlie is, which makes me ☹️.

Ok, so I didn't care much for the leaf animation in the first episode, but omg, the little fire crackles when Nick was trying to hold Charlie's hand? Screaming, crying, throwing up!!!!!!! & the hug before he left? Fucking crops watered for life, bitch!

Was digging Elle's outfit, very 70's vibes.

Ah, so their "secret" is out. Also obligatory: 🗣 LET'S GO LESBIANS LET'S GO 🗣

Can't wait for the next episode, but I practically passed out after watching episode 2 (manual labour is hard, kids 😭), so maybe I hallucinated, but did that Imogen girl ask Nick out? I thought she was daiting Ben? Or is that a different girl?

PS. I found out Aled won't be in the show, which I accept & the only reason I haven't talked about Isaac is because he hasn't really done much yet

[luwritesomething]

Billy Loomis: Headcanons.

Warnings: swearing, and maybe typos, and mentions of manipulation and (untreated) mental illnessess.

Author's note: i love billy, what can i see. i literally have no excuse. might think about doing a part two to this if someone requests it. also, did you know that the first time we see billy on screen, a cover of this song is in the background? since then, i can't stop thinking about him whenever it plays.

comments and reblogs are always appreciated! requests are open, especially for scream! hit that anon button and tell me your ideas. in the scream fandom, i write for billy loomis, stu macher, mickey altieri, chad martin-meeks, mindy martin-meeks, tara carpenter, anika kayoko, laura crane

i think i project a lot into billy because of the daddy issues and the anger.

BUT ANYWAYS,,,

i feel like billy started feeling emotions so much after his mother left. 

like,,, he still feels things, and he laughs, and he has a good time, and he feels sad…. but all those feelings have been weakened since his mother left.

but whenever he does feel strongly, it’s like a explosion. he gets really mad, he gets really sad, and if he likes something, he gets kind of obsessed.

i think that’s some kind of disorder but i’m not here to give him a diagnosis. 

also i feel like he dissociates a lot

but that’s already from a young age

i think his childhood was happy, but now when he thinks about it he remembers a lot of fights between his parents and a sense of emptiness that he’s never really gotten rid of

it’s weird, and he hates it.

his mother is such an important person for him, and her leaving just like that and not taking him with her hurt him way more than he’s ready to admit

he doesn’t like his dad (canon)

like, he really really dislikes the dude. probably hates him.

being angry is his fuel. it’s a constant in his life

i feel like he would relate to jd from heathers. like, a worryingly lot.

he dressed up as jd for halloween, too

it just fits him a lot

he’s a weird kind of popular boy. he’s very selective with his friends, he’s mysterious, doesn’t really like big parties and he can be really rude. but he’s also really charming and he has pretty privilege, so he’s used to getting away with everything

looks like the kind who wouldn’t take notes or pay attention during class but then aces his tests and all

he observes a lot, and in silence. he knows everyone’s names, even if he plays dumb, and probably has a lot of data about everyone around him stored in his brain. very analytic, our billy boy

he’s not a big fan of physical touch. he touches who he wants (his friends, mainly) when he wants (they are all big on physical touch and rarely ever don’t want him to touch them) and only when he wants. 

billy flirts for fun, and mostly because he’s bored. he learned by observing, if not he would have no idea how to do that.

he’s bisexual.

he truly did love sidney in the beginning. his misogyny ruined everything (canon)

he went to a therapist a few times when he was a kid, because nancy (mrs loomis) was worried about him being slightly different and more quiet than other kids. the therapist didn’t pay him much attention and said he was fine.

he canonical has psychosis. the psychotic breakdown came with his mother leaving and him finding out his father had cheated with his grilfriend’s mother.

billy learned to manipulate people from his father.

spoiler, and going back to a previous headcanon, his childhood wasn’t really happy. it takes him a while to accept that, and realize he’s been under his father’s manipulation for a long time.

billy has this black notebook he carries everywhere he goes. he uses it for everything — inside, he has the plans for the murder spree, the people he hates and why, important things he has seen and will use to get what he wants, his anger spurts… it’s all there.

he plans on burning the pages with the murder spree once it’s finished, to leave to clues.

i’ve seen it so much that i can’t remember if it’s canon or if we just made it up, but billy��s father has this cabin they used to go to during the summer and winter holidays. that cabin is his happy place, he loves it and talks about it a lot.

he likes all horror movies, but the fancy ones are his favorites. he thinks he’s better than anyone else, for that, and that’s why randy annoys him so much — randy has a really good taste with movies, so they collide.

probably knows how to cook, even if it’s just a few dishes. it’s not like his father is around too much, so he’s managed to figure it all out.

he’s probably alone in his house a lot, too. even if he enjoys being alone anywhere else, he hates being alone there. 

bitter flavors are his favorite. 

he genuinely enjoys drinking beer. i hate him for that.

he celebrates the fuck out of halloween. it’s always been bigger than christmas, anyways.

his color palette is very simple: white, blue and black. maybe even brown if you push him. and that’s it, the boy’s simple and stylish.

hates being called william.

plays in the football team to release anger. he expects to get a shitty scholarship that will pay some of his college studies and never come back to woodsboro. billy doesn’t care about what he’ll study. ideally, it would be film like randy did in scream 2.

also he’s probably very good at most of the subjects except for one of those a lot of people hate — biology or physics. something like that. 

i want him to be good at english and literature and to read a lot.

and i actually headcanon him as a voracious reader, especially horror novels.

his old time favorite is dracula, but he loves stephen king’s writer. 

will defend carrie with his life.

he’s supposed to have a car? or does he share it with his dad? whatever. he walks to school most of the times, he doesn’t like driving. he gets a lot of road rage and he doesn’t want to disconnect — that’s the word he uses for his dissociative episodes — whenever he’s on the wheel.

if you’re his friend and you don’t like horror movies, no you’re not.

he’d be so good with writing essays, no, i will not elaborate.

probably can’t see shit from very afar. he used to have very good sight but not anymore — that means, he’s slightly myopic. it’s not too bad, though, so he’s refused to get glasses.

he’s very obsessive with his special interests (aren’t we all?)

really likes knifes, but are we surprised? his father probably gifted him one after a few hunting trips together, and the boy’s a goner now.

most parents like him, again, because of his charisma. even with the bad boy vibes going on, he can put on the most perfect sweet boy act and that makes everyone fall for him. he just needs to feel motivated for it to work

he’s a good actor, therefore. i think he’s proven that already, though, even if he acts hella sus all the time he fools people into trusting him

LOVES the feeling of power. billy needs to be a few steps before you to feel in control and be able to relax about anyone. knowledge is power, and he will do whatever to have that power.

mastermind™

has no favorite color — he couldn’t care less about choosing a favorite color.

[lacontroller1991]

Hello! I'm not sure if you're doing ships/matchups, so disregard this message if you aren't!

𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒐𝒎𝒔: The Walking Dead & Marvel

I'm pansexual, she/her pronouns. I don't mind being shipped with either gender!

𝑭𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒆𝒔: I'm about 5'5, pale skin, blue/grey eyes, blonde around my face and brown then black at the ends of my hair. I have many many piercings, and I'm covered in tattoos. I'm curvy/plus size and am body positive.

𝑯𝒐𝒃𝒃𝒊𝒆𝒔: Reading, writing, collecting rings, journaling, tarot. I'm also collecting as many books as I can because I want to have my own library where people can take whichever book they wish.

𝑷𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚: INFJ, Chaotic Good, Gryffindor, Aquarius Sun, Capricorn Moon, Aries Rising, Pisces Venus (this last one might help with the match especially). I'm a passionate person and have strong opinions. I will always stand up for what I believe in, no matter how scared I feel. I think I'm quite witty and intelligent, although I do get overwhelmed quite easily. I'm incredibly open-minded and progressive. I love to laugh and make others laugh too. I'm sensitive, and intuitive and can pick up on other people very easily. I have strong gut-feelings and kinda ... understand a person's vibe? Like I can sense someone's aura but not see their colour.

𝑨𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒕𝒊𝒄: I love cottagecore, I'm very witchy but also a little grunge and gothic at the same time.

𝑳𝒊𝒌𝒆𝒔: Learning - especially witchcraft, watching tv, day-dreaming, listening and discovering new music, I love being at home, writing and then taking a reading break. I adore baths and constantly buy items from Lush.

𝑫𝒊𝒔𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆𝒔: (other than the usual injustices of sexism, racism, and homophobia), I strongly dislike spiders and will scream whenever I see one. I don't like close-minded people, or those who make fun of others. I hate passive-aggressiveness, large crowds and loud sudden noises.

𝑳𝒊𝒍 𝒇𝒖𝒏 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒔 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒎𝒆:

・Have shaved my head. Asked my stepdad for his clippers and went into the bathroom and ...hacked at my hair. It was very liberating, I think every woman should do it at least once in her lifetime

・I adore animals - I have a cat and dog! I want more but my cat is too much of a princess and won't allow any other animal in the house

・Bought a tattoo gun from the internet and I tattoo myself. I do the majority of my own piercings as well. I like to learn how to do things like that. I've kinda learned how to do hair and do mine, my mum's and my nunna's.

Sorry if this was too much, it's hard to describe oneself in a post. Thank you very much, I hope you have a wonderful day x

Hey love!!! Thank you for sending this in!!!

For The Walking Dead I can honestly see you with Tara

(I'm going to preface this by saying I don't know how old you are, but assuming you're over at least 18, then I think Tara would be a good match).

Once you and Tara meet, I think the two of you would become fast friends, easily making jokes with each other and thus your relationship will bloom. I also think you and Tara probably share the same set of beliefs in which you both are very opinionated and out spoken, a trait that maybe not everyone will appreciate, but fuck them.

With your reading, I can see her and you sneaking off camp to find a library and sitting for hours on end just reading various things off the shelf and trying to remember the old days where libraries weren't full of dead, rotting corpses.

I also think she would be super open to let you practice tattoos on her (if she's not then just ask Daryl, he 1000000000% has done his own tattoos and grows his own tobacco (we love to see it)) and she's also SUPER protective of you, if anyone or anything tries to hurt you, you best believe that she will put her life on the line for you.

For Marvel I can see you with Ned (hear me out)

You'd probably meet Ned in class and be automatically enraptured by his sense of humor, however you probably wouldn't feel comfortable talking to him while MJ and Peter are there (I mean I wouldn't feel comfortable living in the presence of our queen Zendaya), however I think you would seek him out and talk to him, which would definitely catch his attention.

I think the reason the two of you would work well together is how sharp witted and humorous the two of you are. I think the banter between the two of you would go on and on for Hours, but I also think just sitting in silence with him would be great as well.

As for your hobbies, I think he would definitely take an interest in the witchcraft (given he can open a portal with Strange's sling ring) and would be open to learning about the craft more and maybe even practice some basic spells with you!

Now for your fear..... even though Ned's best friend is SPIDER man, I don't think you would know that fact unless they told you, but even then, it's not like Peter is an actual spider so you should be good!!!

Thank you for requesting a match up and I hope you enjoyed reading!!!!

[0junemeatcleaver0]

(Re)Introduction

Clothing choices are so important in The Chronicles that Anne sometimes sounded a lot like Tara Gilesbie when describing her characters. And while cut and fabric remain fairly uniform over the series and cross-character, where the real intrigue lies is in color choice.

In this series, I will be examining the choices in wardrobe color for three of Anne's characters; Lestat, Marius, and Armand.

You may also have noticed that I did this already. The original version of this post was my return to writing meta after a very long break. I was clearly rusty, but too excited at having 'completed' a post to keep myself from posting it. This is the much improved version of this meta.

For this post, we will be moving through the books chronologically.

Lestat (Redux)

But you see, if a vampire leaves out details like clothes, the story doesn't make sense. Even the most grandiose mythic characters--if they are flesh and blood--do have to worry about the latchets on sandals. -Lestat in Memnoch the Devil (398)

Just as every cop is a criminal And all the sinners saints As heads is tails Just call me Lucifer 'Cause I'm in need of some restraint -The Rolling Stones || Sympathy for the Devil

While it is impossible to skip over Interview due to it being our introduction to many of our central characters, the book is so different from the rest of the series as to feel foreign to who Lestat would eventually become--or at least, who Anne later wanted us to believe he was.

Anne herself said in a Facebook post:

Characters do come to life on the page, the cliche is absolutely the truth. Lestat was born for me in that way, a character in Interview with the Vampire whom I did not think was all that important. He was born as the bad guy, the bully, the bad vampire who didn't appreciate the hero's sensitivity. Louis was the hero. Louis was me. Louis was the novel. And somehow or other, as one of my friends put it: Louis was drawn vividly in black ink, but Lestat came to life in blazing color. [x]

And so for the sake of both the literal and figurative blazing color of Lestat, we shall begin here in our quest to figure out how Anne tried to convince us that Lestat is the ultimate hero of the Chronicles.

Throughout all of Interview, we see Lestat in black.

From a newly turned Louis staring at the buttons on Lestat's coat (p. 21), to the white blanket Claudia was wrapped in contrasting starkly with his coat and cape (p. 90), to a haggard Lestat turning up to Claudia's "trial" in all black (p. 295), whenever we see him, he's in black.

This is not much of a revelation when we stop to consider this was a story poured forth out of grief which ended up accidentally reviving the vampire craze in popular culture. This is what makes the text stand out from its sequels--Interview was an emotional purge. TVL and QotD was Anne fleshing out her inner world. Every subsequent book was her having fun playing in that space.

The point is, from Nosferatu to the actual Count Dracula, vampires in popular culture up to that point wore black. It made sense to put Lestat (and Louis, and Armand) in black. It was a foregone conclusion.

Lestat in black does not start to feel interesting or in fact even important to me until later in the series.

What is interesting to me is how the color red came to be so closely tied to him. Many works of fan art feature him in red. Reading a fic? Better bet a hefty percentage of those authors are going to put him in red velvet. I know I cannot be the only person whose mind conjures up Lestat-in-red when picturing him. Even Marius gets salty about him wearing red when speaking to Thorne (Blood and Gold, p. 31) despite the fact that as far as canon goes, Lestat hasn't actually worn red that much.

As a matter of fact, save for the cloak he is gifted after killing the wolfs, Lestat doesn't wear much red in his own novel, either.

But another character does.

When we first meet Nicolas de Lenfent, he is wearing a shade of rose:

Dressed in a splendid brocade coat of rose and gold, he wore slippers with gold heels, and layers of Italian lace at his collar. [...] Parisian fashion, all this [...]. (TVL, p. 41-42)

Yes, I know that's a shade of pink and not a shade of red. But this first meeting of theirs is important to the topic at hand for the following reasons:

1). From a symbolism point of view, Nicki showing up in rose signals how Lestat's feelings for him will develop (rose signifying of romantic love).

2) Homeboy looks so good it makes Lestat feel self conscious:

And here I was to meet him in threadbare wool and scuffed leather boots and yellowed lace that had been seventeen times mended. -TVL (p. 42)

3) And he's here to gift Lestat his spiffy new identity cloak.

We bowed to each other, as he was apparently the spokesman for the town, and then he unwrapped from its modest covering of black serge a great red velvet cloak lined in fur. Gorgeous thing. His eyes were positively shining when he looked at me. You would have thought he was looking at a sovereign. -TVL (p. 42)

Let's put a pin in the cloak for now.

Instead, let's discuss the next time red shows up in The Vampire Lestat in an important way.

When we reached the stable, I saw the boy had been hideously murdered. His broken body lay twisted on the hay-strewn floor as if it had been flung there by a Titan. The back of his head was shattered. And to mock him, it seemed, or to mock me, they had dressed him in a gentleman's fancy velvet frock coat. Red velvet. (TVL p. 189)

This moment--or this coat, rather--vexes Lestat for the rest of the night.

I kept thinking over and over of the stable boy, mangled and thrown there in that fancy red velvet frock coat. I had seen that coat before and I couldn't remember where I had seen it. Had it been one of my own? Had they gotten into the tower? No, that was not possible, they couldn't have gotten in. -TVL (p. 190)

So perplexed, in fact, that Gabrielle had to be the one to clue him in:

"Lestat," she said soberly. "They put your stable boy in a gentleman's frock coat after they killed him. Did you see the coat? Hadn't you seen it before?" That damned red velvet coat... "I have seen it," she said. "I had looked at it for hours at my bedside in Paris. It was Nicolas de Lenfent's coat." -TVL (p. 195)

We'll put yet another pin in the matter of Nicolas's red coat for the moment.

For now, let's visit Lestat, the failed rock star.

At the beginning of TVL, he tells us he was roused from one of his long dirt naps by the murmurs of a culture changing around him and the music of a local garage band.

When he finally unearths himself and rejoins the world, this is the picture he paints for us:

But after the third night up, I was roaring around New Orleans on a big black Harley-Davidson motorcycles making plenty of noise myself. I was looking for more killers to feed on. I wore gorgeous black leather clothes that I’d taken from my victims, and I had a little Sony Walkman stereo in my pocket that fed Bach’s Art of the Fugue through tiny earphones right into my head as I blazed along. […] I was the vampire Lestat again. -TVL (p. 6-7)

The other two instances of Lestat relaying his outfits to us in Queen of the Damned (where the rock star story line continues), they read as costumes. The first is Lestat in his God-of-the-modern-world costume (all gray silk suit in a modern cut and silver jewelry, QotD p. 358) and his Normal-guy-nothing-to-see-here costume (denim jacket, white tee, QotD p. 473)

And while the costume-y nature of these outfits doesn't beg much attention from me, this won't be the only time the color gray shows up on Lestat when he's feeling conflicted or noncommittal towards a situation. (Note: The gray silk suit is worn when it becomes apparent Akasha is truly unhinged but Lestat's love of her holds him back from trying to make a decision on what to do about her plans for world domination, if anything.)

What we see here is that Lestat's color is at this point still black.

It's easy enough for the color black to make a quick change of sorts in the narrative. Black is a great color to dress your villain in, due to it being symbolically tied with evil and obfuscation. Flip side of that coin is the fact that black is also the color of sophistication and seduction. Of mystery. The exact attributes I would want my vampire anti-hero to have.

Tale of the Body Thief

Lestat is at a weird point in his existence when we meet him in TofBT. We again see him in a gray suit (p. 11). We watch him stalk a serial killer he plans on eating. Which he does, saving the life of an old lady in the process. An old lady he also drains of blood.

There's also the whole business of him going into the sun in a moment of emotional weakness.

Gray is the most neutral of colors. It is also a deeply pessimistic color, [x] signalling the state of mind Lestat is in--IE desperate enough to fall for Raglan James's bullshit.

Speaking of, Lestat goes to meet James for the body swap wearing a black velvet suit with antique buttons. A very Lestat 'fit. This signals to me Lestat's need to feel confident and in control of this exchange (for all the good that did him in the end).

Of course, once the swap is made, we don't get much intel on what Lestat is wearing--the mortal body itself being the uncomfortable costume this time. Once he is returned to his body, he dresses in a white turtle neck and khaki. (p. 360) According to designs.ai, khaki denotes trust and--more importantly--safety. An understandable emotion to experience after being put back into your body.

Memnoch

An interesting thing to note about Memnoch the Devil is that Lestat spends most of the story in dark blue. (p.4 and p. 399)

We'll revisit that in a moment. First, I want to make note that this novel is the first instance of Lestat wearing his sunglasses with violet lenses.

While fans of the Chronicles started voicing their complaints about the change in Lestat's character with TotBT, Memnoch is where those changes really lock into place. And I feel as though the glasses reflect this.

According to nixsensor.com, shades of purple are "often associated with royalty, nobility, luxury, power, and ambition. Purple also represents meanings of wealth, extravagance, creativity, wisdom, dignity, grandeur, devotion, peace, pride, mystery, independence, and magic."

This is indicative of the Lestat we get moving forward (when he's not in his comatose state). The sign that he's gone from the damnedest creature to The Brat Prince.

Now back to Lestat's stupid Brooks Brothers suits.

He begins this tale in a double breasted, dark blue BB suit (p. 4) and ends it in a double breasted blue BB suit (p. 399).

According to color-meanings.com, dark blue is associated with knowledge, power, and integrity.

Let's think about how Lestat chose to reintroduce himself to us in this book:

I know exactly who I am. I am rich. I am beautiful. I can see my reflection in mirrors. And in shop windows. I love to sing and dance. (MtD, p.2)

Sounds like a pretty hollow understanding of the self to me. Alexa, play Pretty Hurts by Beyonce.

Lestat begins the story a pretty but empty shell. Through his time with Dora and David and the weirdness with ghost!Rodger, God and the devil and the afterlife is on his mind. When he tells his loved ones that a spirit claiming to want to take him on a tour of hell keeps harassing him, they all tell him it would be a terrible idea to take him up on that off, Lestat obviously acquiesces because the quickest way to get a brat to do something is to tell them not to do it.

In summation, Lestat begins this tale knowing nothing and he ends it knowing even less. As uncertain of his place in the world he was before, he's now grappling with his place within the spirit realm as well. And the terror of that and the confusion of that puts his ass unresponsive on the floor for the span of two more books.

Merrick (& Blackwood Farm & Blood Canticle)

That is until Louis ends up in peril after changing Merrick. We don't know what exactly he was wearing when he laid down for his long slumber, only that he was coated in dust when he rose (p. 341).

In the scene following the revivification of Louis, we see that Lestat has chosen for himself dark brown velvet to wear (p. 345). According to verywellmind.com, "Brown is often seen as solid, much like the earth, and it's a color often associated with resilience, dependability, security, and safety". This color choice is indicative of one of the few times Lestat stepped up and took true responsibility for his fledgling.

A few pages later, having been conscious for a while and being as certain as he could be that Louis was safe and stable, we see Lestat back in black velvet (p. 357). As David states it:

With every passing hour, Lestat became more the old creature of action and impulse which I had loved for so long. (p. 357)

Lestat is once more himself, wearing the same black velvet coat with the cameo buttons he would wear during the beginning of Blackwood Farm (p. 22).

The motif of Lestat in black continues into the beginning of Blood Canticle as well (p. 17).

Red is the Color of Revisionism

The metatextualism of the Chronicles is a slippery thing. The books exist within the narrative of the books. Anne Rice exists only as a pseudonym chosen by Daniel in the novels. One book in the series will mention events that happened in an earlier installment. Characters contradict each other. Narrators will omits certain things while others will make it a point to retroactively mention something that happened 'off screen', so to speak.

And sometimes Anne just misremembered shit herself.

Which is how despite Lestat wearing mostly black throughout all of the first ten books of the Chronicles we still end up getting quotes like this:

Clad in red velvet it came, the very covering my old Master had so loved, the dream king, Marius. It came swaggering and camping through the lighted streets of Paris as though God had made it. -The Vampire Armand, p. 309

"It's my common way to wear red," Marius said to Thorne's unspoken interest. "You do as you like. Lestat, my sometime pupil, also loves it which annoys me mightily but I endure it. I think we appear to be Master and Apprentice when his shade of clear red comes so close to mine." -Blood and Gold, p. 31

It's also how we get Antoine remembering Lestat as a "shining Titan in his red velvet frock coat and lace" in Prince Lestat.

The motif of Lestat in red continues all throughout the final three books in the Chronicles.

In Prince Lestat, he wears a red velvet jacket and black boots to go to Avignon (p. 193). He obtains and wears a new red velvet coat to make his first speech as Prince (p. 387). His violet sunglasses even make an appearance on page 207.

In Realms of Atlantis, we see him in his "usual" red velvet and lace (p. 258) and again in his violet glasses (p. 114)

In Blood Communion, after killing Rhosh he exchanges his velvet coat (of a non-disclosed color) for a crimson-red velvet coat (p. 165) and again we see him in a red velvet frock coat and copious lace (p. 241) in the final ball scene.

In her final years, this was the version of Lestat that was crystalized in Anne's mind.

So how did we get here? How did Lestat’s color end up being red throughout the final books?

Anne runs us through a series of flash back scenes through Lestat’s POV in Prince Lestat. Through these scenes, she remembers—or perhaps recontextualizes—a more directionless Lestat, embittered by all he has been through.

He wanders, looking for meaning and finding some in care taking a young Rose from a distance.

But mostly, he’s just sad and angry. This is a deeply pessimistic Lestat she paints for us in PL. It is also the start of the most consistent use of the red motif for his character.

The most rational reading is that Lestat had by this point become Anne’s favorite character (her second favorite arguably being Marius). Anne was a fan of Renaissance art, paintings especially. The Great Masters of the Renaissance would have taught her that if you wish to draw the eye to the most important figure in any composition, you paint them in red—the color of power and authority.

But I’m a fic writer, a fangirl. I am not satisfied by readings that are merely rational. Let’s go a bit off the deep end, shall we? Let us take the pins out of the Nicki situation.

Lestat in his youth (pre-vampirism) wanted nothing more than a better life for himself. Renown and a comfortable life. Independence. He wanted, ultimately, to be taken seriously—his needs, his desires, his art.

He had failed to leave his dreary life behind him twice by the time he met Nicki—once at the monastery, and again with the actors. And he’d been punished cruelly both times—being locked in his rooms and being beaten, respectably.

He’s emotionally/spiritually beaten by these defeats as well. There is no sign of the Lestat we would come to later know—the swaggering, devil-may-care rogue, the Brat Prince who would have laughed in the face of anyone who dared try to stop him. Instead we have a sensitive hunter who must provide for his family as he secretly nurtures a spiteful desire for More Than This.

The real independent young man with talent and a comfortable life (and the love of his father no matter how much he disappointed him—another thing Lestat was lacking) was Nicki. The young man who while studying law said ‘fuck it’ and went to learn violin from fucking Mozart himself. The young man who sold all of his books to do this. The young man who even after having his father smash his violin and threaten to break his hands ran off to Clermont and sold his watch to buy another. Who plays his violin all over the goddamned village in spite of what his father or anyone else may think of him for it.

Lestat is ‘impossible’ in the way a toddler having a tantrum is impossible. Nicki, though, is quite literally impossible to control.

Nicki, the favorite son, the unstoppable force in his red velvet frock coat.

And as previously stated, Lestat did wear red in TVL. In the form of his cloak, gifted to him by Nicki and worn so frequently in the time of their Conversation.

We bowed to each other, as he was apparently the spokesman for the town, and then he unwrapped from its modest covering of black serge a great red velvet cloak lined in fur. Gorgeous thing. His eyes were positively shining when he looked at me. You would have thought he was looking at a sovereign. -TVL, p. 42

If you want to take this excerpt from TVL above Super Seriously, we see a red cloak emerging from black, wool fabric. An emblem of a more refined, flashy and lux version of Lestat rising out of a duller, more utilitarian version of himself. A thought that becomes more fun to play with when you begin to view the cloak as the first sign post on the Devil’s Road–becoming the Wolf Killer is what made Magnus believe Lestat would be strong enough to endure becoming his heir, after all.

The start of Lestat's new life and eventual hero's journey (of sorts) all begins with that red cloak.

Nicolas gets brought up quite a bit in the final books—seems to weigh pretty heavily on Lestat’s mind even while the Court is established, aliens visit, Amel plagues him.

It’s a funny accident, that (accident because I don’t think Anne was doing this on purpose).

It is difficult to be objective about those we love. Nicki’s exuberance for cruelty and taste for the destruction of himself and those around him are no secret to us the reader. But Lestat seems to keep the reality of who Nicki was—or at least, who he became in the Blood—at arm’s length from himself, as though blinded still by the love he feels/felt for his second fledgling.

And so, when needing to become the strongest version of himself for all of vampire kind, he dons red velvet—like impossible, indomitably stubborn Nicki, and his sometimes mentor Marius.

Cue donning a red velvet frock coat throughout most of the latter books.

That damned red velvet coat indeed.

[booksarelife-stuff]

our secret moments in a crowded room

Jily (James Potter/Lily Evans), minor Wolfstar (Remus Lupin/Sirius Black)

My entry for the September Jily Challenge! @jilychallenge

Prompt: I tripped on the red carpet and you caught me

Partner was the amazing @kates836! Thank you for being an amazing partner!

In a fake PR relationship with Severus Snape, Lily can’t help be distracted by the real person who has her heart. 

Word Count: 4,077

Read of Ao3     Masterlist

The car took a sharp left and Lily tried to stabilize herself so she didn’t touch Severus, who was sitting beside her. She made eye contact with Mary, who was sitting in the passenger seat. Mary shot her the millionth apologetic look.

Lily glanced back down at her phone, just in time to see a reply to the picture that she had sent of her in her dress.

Ahdjsfhkjdsf I can’t breathe. How dare you send this to me right before I walk out on the red carpet.

She smiled widely down at her phone.

I don’t know how I’m going to function with you that close and can’t do anything about it.

She smiled faltered for a second, because yeah, that was truly going to be torture for her too.

I’m about to go out. I can’t wait to see you.

Lily bit her lip before typing a reply.

If you think this dress looks good on me now, wait until you take it off.

The message bubbles appeared instantly and Lily’s smile turned smug.

You shouldn’t have said that. I’m going to think about it all night now. Love you

Love you too

She locked her phone and handed it to Mary, who would be holding all of her personal items for the rest of the night. Severus sighed deeply beside her and Lily tried not to roll her eyes.

If Lily had it her way, she’d be arriving with a very different date. But Lily didn’t have a choice. What the studio wanted, the studio got. Including a semi-fake relationship with her co-star, Severus Snape.

They had just finished filming the final season of their wildly popular show, The Hollow Hour. The show definitely didn’t need this kind of press to be successful, but Lily still didn’t have a choice in the matter, considering she had already booked a leading role in another one of their shows.

On-screen, Lily and Snape played Tara and Gideon, characters who had been in love since they were children and fighting in a war where they possibly wouldn’t make it out. Off-screen, Lily could hardly stand the presence of Snape.

It didn’t start out that way. When they’d first met, Lily had thought he was pretty cool. The show had been her first big break, as she had only done television guest appearances before then. Snape had a few movies under his belt, one of which was super popular. Their friendship had started out as his kind of giving her direction when it came to the whole fame thing.

Then, it got a little invasive. He would just be in her trailer, coming in without knocking. He started asking for more date-like hangouts. His disgusting political beliefs started coming out through their conversations and his apparent hatred for their co-star, Remus Lupin because he was openly gay. And he started acting as she owed him something, especially since the show took off.

The rumors had started before Lily realized that Snape was the creep that he was. People saw them pining on screen and going out for the occasional drink after a long day when Lily could still stand him and suddenly, people thought they were in love.

It had been a real nuisance in Lily’s life. Every interview, she tried to squash the rumors, whereas Snape would encourage them. It didn’t help that the show got popular, like really insane amounts of popularity. The character shipping took a sharp left turn into people shipping them.

Snily, they called them. From fanfiction to edits and art to covers of glossy magazines. It was everywhere. No matter if Lily was doing interviews from one of her movies, they would ask about Snape.

And since Lily was some sort of a masochist, she knew exactly what the fans thought of their relationship. They thought Lily denied the relationship because she was very private about her life, and Snape would never say it outright because he wanted to respect her but also wanted the world to know that she is his.

It didn’t help that Snape had accumulated a very dedicated fanbase. Like worship-the-ground-he-walked-on kind of dedication. To the point where Lily would get occasional death threats because she was “hurting him by denying their relationship.”

They never seemed to believe Lily when she said no, much like Snape and their studio. Lily couldn’t flat out deny the relationship in interviews anymore until after the final episode. It made her want to dry heave.

The car was slowing, and Lily could hear the buzz of fans and reporters. They were in the queue now for the red carpet. Mary unbuckled and twisted around in the seat, doing a final check of Lily’s hair and make-up.

Lily smoothed down her green satin dress, her legs bent awkwardly to not crease the dress and also not puncture the fabric with her stiletto pumps. Lily’s after-party dress was hanging up in the back, but Lily didn’t know if she was actually going to attend.

It had taken her a long time to feel beautiful at these types of events. Being considered plus size in this industry felt like a death sentence, especially since Lily refused to play the “funny fat friend” or anything like that. But she felt good tonight, especially with the way it hugged her curves and the bit of cleavage showed.

Severus looked like himself, just in a suit. His greasy hair was covered in dry shampoo and tucked behind his ears. He turned towards Lily and smiled like a cat who got the cream.

“We could make this real, you know?” he said, for probably the millionth time. “You and I would work.”

Lily tried not to crinkle her nose in disgust. “Severus,” she said. “You know I have no interest in that.”

There had been many times where Lily wished she could speak her mind and rip him a new one, but she could not get branded as a diva. So, she played off these uncomfortable moments with a laugh and polite words, even when she was telling him no for the millionth time.

She saw the corner of his lips turn down in a slight frown and averted her eyes to stare straight ahead.

The voices outside got louder and suddenly the car was stopping. Mary jumped out of the car quickly as Lily unbuckled. Moody, Lily’s driver, and bodyguard, also got out quickly to open Lily’s door.

She had to take Moody’s hand to step out. She wobbled when she shifted her weight to her high heels but quickly corrected herself. She was going to have blisters for weeks after tonight. Mary appeared from the other side of the car, hands already straightening Lily’s dress.

They were covered from the cameras here, so no one saw Mary make sure Lily’s breasts were firmly taped into the dress. The low cut of the dress required her boobs to be placed perfectly and one slip would probably cost Lily her career. That’s why Lily had Mary, her best friend since they were children and who now worked as her PA. The back of the dress was practically nonexistent and her long auburn waves tickled her with every movement.

Mary quickly batted away one of her dark coily curls that snuck out of its bun before giving Lily a once over.

“You look gorgeous,” she said, smiling. “He’s not going to want to take his eyes off of you.”

Lily gave her a real smile and a quick hug before stepping away to get around the car where Severus was surely waiting. She already had her red carpet smile on and tried not to pay attention to the up and down look Severus was giving her.

Severus reached out his arm to escort Lily, but Lily walked past it. They said they had to arrive together, not actually walk together. Mary let out a snort of laughter as she followed Lily out to the carpet—to walk with Lily but hidden away.

The lights were blinding as Lily walked out on the carpet. Cameras flashing every second, people yelling questions at her. Lily was now a pro at this, after so many years of practice. The screams intensified, signaling Snape was now making his appearance.

Lily moved slowly down the carpet, making sure her smile stayed in place. Towards the end of her walk, Snape did sneak up on her, wrapping an arm around her waist taking extra care to let his fingers drag against her bare skin. She fought to not recoil away from him.

She smiled and laughed though she wanted to push him away.

The entrance to Royal Albert Hall was full of reporters and cameras. Lily never really minded this part of the red carpet because most of the time it was just questions like “who are you wearing?” or the occasional fun game with whatever fledgling media company had weaseled reporters in.

Lily was heading towards the first available reporter, a young woman who was smiling widely as Lily approached. But a familiar head of dark curls caught her eye, and she couldn’t help the way her attention turned immediately that way.

It had been six weeks since her boyfriend of three years had touched her. Six weeks since she had felt the indentation of him next to her in bed, felt his warmth, had him within her fingertips.

And James looked so good, it made Lily want to pull him away and find the nearest secluded spot. The way his tailored suit hugged the angles of his body, the body that she knew like it her own.

She could feel her heart start pounding in her chest, and she hoped the cameras weren’t picking up the way her hands were shaking.

“Lily Evans!” the young reporter cheered. “How are you on this fine evening?”

“I’m doing great,” Lily said, smiling and resisting the urge to look at James.

“So, you arrived with rumored beau and co-star, Severus Snape,” the reporter cheered. “Care to confirm anything?”

Lily fake laughed. “We just carpooled. Better for the environment.”

The girl’s face tightened a bit, but the reporter knew better than to press.

Lily answered her questions with ease. Who was she wearing? Did she feel good about her role as a presenter? What was she going to do after the final season of The Hollow Hour?

Once the interview concluded, she turned to go to the next reporter.

But there was James, looking at her with a slight smile on his lips. His dark brown eyes did a quick once over of her, appraising her every curve quickly. And goddamn, he wore his glasses instead of his contacts, reminding Lily of the quiet moments in her flat where they were tangled together, his glasses pushing into her face. His normal frizzy curls were more defined thanks to whatever hair product his stylist made him use. His brown skin was as flawless as ever, glowing in the camera flashes in the fading day.

It couldn’t have been more than a moment where their eyes met, but it was enough to thoroughly distract Lily to the point of missing the small bump in the carpet. Her shoe caught and the sensation of falling happened before she felt strong arms catch her.

“Are you okay?” James asked as Lily’s world steadied in his arms, the concern in his eyes.

Lily felt her cheeks redden, both from the embarrassment of tripping on the red carpet and the fact that she was in James’s arms. She nodded but when she stepped back, her right shoe gave out.

She moved away from James’s arms, but took his hand, their fingers clasping each other, to keep her balance as she lifted her dress up to see the heel completely snapped off.

“Well, that’s great,” she said with a laugh. James laughed with her. She wobbled for a second and James’s hand grabbed her side to steady her, his fingers making her burn.

Lily couldn’t help but smile softly at him as Mary appeared, getting on her knees in front of Lily, urging her to turn slightly. She let go of James’s hand and used his shoulder to keep her balance as Mary undid the straps on Lily’s shoes. Mary, who was definitely getting a raise after this, took off her own black kitten heels and gave them to Lily.

She was now several inches shorter and her dress dragged a bit on the ground, but it was better than no shoes at all.

“I owe you my life,” Lily told Mary, who smiled in response. Lily didn’t miss the way she gave James a glance and then a teasing smile back to her. She turned back to James. “Thank you so much.”

“No problem,” he replied. “I’ll see you around?”

She wanted to say that she would see him tonight, preferably with no clothes, but she just smiled and nodded in response.

As she let go and James stepped away, the last thing on her mind was the cameras catching every moment.

~~~

To Lily’s detriment, her manager had called Mary to tell Lily that she had to be seen at the after-party with Snape.

Lily tried not to recoil at Severus’s hand on her lower back as he led her to the after-party. The cameras were blinding against the darkness of the night, but Lily let herself be led into the venue, Moody doing his best to push back against the raging crowd.

The venue only had a few selective members of the press inside, but it was little enough that it put all the celebrities at ease. There was no real food, just snacks because seeing your favorite movie star get sloshed would sell magazines and get them trending on Twitter.

Lily’s stomach growled. She couldn’t remember the last full meal she had.

Severus kept a firm hand on her back. She smiled and laughed at the right times as they talked with winners from the night. A live band started and Lily’s ears rang with the loud music. She kept knocking back glasses of champagne because at least the buzz would take the edge off the hungry looks in Severus’s eyes and make her not recoil when he tried to whisper in her ear.

Her saving grace came in the form of Remus Lupin somewhere south of midnight.

She came back from the loo and purposefully walked away from where she knew Severus was waiting. The alcohol was thrumming through her veins, and she felt light. Her shoes—or Mary’s shoes—had been kicked off long ago, and she was stumbling through the crowds of famous people.

Remus stood at the picked-over snack table, probably looking for any scraps of leftover chocolate. He had been Lily’s co-star since day one and her favorite to boot. Severus hated him, mostly because Lily liked him more, but also because he was openly gay and in a long-term relationship with the model, Sirius Black, who Snape also hated.

Remus had been the reason she and James met. She also knew that where Remus was, Sirius wasn’t far, and if Sirius wasn’t far, neither was James.

And she wanted to see James more than anything.

“Boo,” she said, poking Remus’s side. The man jumped, almost dropping his chocolate-covered strawberry.

“Bloody hell, Evans,” he said. Lily laughed, already feeling better. She clumsily picked up a biscuit and took a bite.

“How’s your night been going?” she asked. Remus let out an amused huff.

“Same old, same old,” he said. “You?”

Lily didn’t respond and Remus laughed, knowing exactly how her night had been going. They grabbed a few more snacks and Lily proceeded to follow him, hoping that he would lead her to the person she needed to see.

James was sitting at a table across from Sirius, and Lily’s heart immediately started beating rapidly. His suit jacket and tie were gone, just leaving him in his tight white button-up. The top buttons were undone, hinting at his chest that Lily knew better than the back of her own hand.

The sluggish haze of the alcohol in her system reminded her of when they first met. It had been at The Hollow Hour season one wrap party, and Remus had invited James and Sirius. He had caught her eye from across the room, the curly black hair and glasses were a dangerous combination for Lily, especially with the dark jeans that had hugged his very nice arse. She was so nervous that she had had to take a shot before she walked over to have Remus introduce her.

She had taken him home and when she woke up in the morning, recovering from the best sex she had ever had in her life, she found him making breakfast for her.

He stayed the whole weekend.

Then they texted non-stop and started having dates, sitting in Lily’s apartment with take-away and cheesy movies.

And here they were, three years later, hopelessly in love, and pretending that they weren’t because her stupid television show needed promoting.

It hadn’t been meant to be a secret for so long. In the beginning, they just wanted to figure each other out without all the press breathing down their necks. It’s just how it all happened.

It wasn’t like the important people in their lives didn’t know. Their parents and most trusted friends did. And they already decided that once the whole thing with Snape stopped, they were going to go public because they wanted to move in together and finally go on real dates.

Lily saw the way he perked up when he saw her. A small smile on his lips, his shoulders moving back. There was a moment when Lily could have sworn that there were no other people in the room until someone bumped into her.

She slid into the booth beside him, not caring about how dangerous that was, especially when their legs touched.

“Hey,” he said, his deep voice tugging at her in a way she missed while he was gone.

“Hey,” she replied. She could tear her eyes away from him and she didn’t know if she wanted to, either.

“Bloody hell,” Sirius said, not even jarring the couple. “Get out of here before you start shagging on the table.”

James raised his eyebrows in question, which Lily answered with a smile. He reached down for his pockets.

“I’m texting Moody,” he said.

Anticipation pooled in her stomach and as she grabbed another biscuit to eat because it was something to do, her hands shook. James placed his hands on Lily’s thigh and she couldn’t think of anything else until he leaned over and told her that Moody said it was all clear.

Even in her drunk state, she located her shoes and practically sprinted to the back door where Moody was waiting.

There were a few paparazzi pictures taken as Lily quickly hopped into the back of the SUV and Moody got into the driver’s seat. He handed her her small bag that had her phone in it that Mary had been carrying. She was too excited to even get her phone out as Moody did two laps around the block before pulling right back into the same spot.

The second James jumped in and the door was closed, Lily was on him. She grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him to her, meeting their lips in a deep, but sloppy kiss. Lily kicked her legs up onto his lap and pulled him down as laid down the best she could in the back seat. James laughed a little against her lips, causing Lily to pull away and laugh too.

“Next year, we’re going to this together,” she said, opening her eyes to see him in whatever light that shone in from the windows. She got flashes of his eyes and his wide smile as she sat up, still keeping her legs on her.

“Absolutely,” he replied, pressing a light kiss to her lips. “And we’re going to still traumatize Moody on the way home.”

Said man let out a snort. “No, I’m getting a divider.”

Lily barely remembers the rest of the car ride and getting to her flat. All she remembers is the taste of James’s lips and the feeling of his hands on her.

~~~

The blaring noise of a phone call is what made Lily wake up. She jumped violently, kicking James in the process, who let out a pained groan as Lily disentangled herself from him to be able to reach her nightstand to turn off the god-forsaken ear-splitting sound.

Her hand smacked into the nightstand, but her phone wasn’t there. She realized it must be James’s.

She nudged him and he groaned, but she could feel him move around in the bed. Finally, it stopped and James spoke.

“Hello?” he fell silent. “What are you talking about?”

Lily, who was already falling asleep again, opened her eyes at his tone and suddenly, he was shaking her.

“I’ll call you back Sirius,” James said as Lily sat up.

He hung up the call and threw his phone down on the bed. He tugged at his hair as Lily watched him with wide eyes.

“They know about us,” he said.

“What?” Lily exclaimed, reaching for his phone.

She typed in the passcode and saw the million phone calls from his manager and publicist. She opened Twitter, and right there, trending number one, was a still of James’s arm around her when she broke her shoe.

"Lily Evans, caught in a love triangle."

"Actress Lily Evans and actor James Potter are rumored to have left the BAFTA after-party together despite Evans arriving with Severus Snape."

She clicked on the first article while her stomach soured.

"Lily Evans and Severus Snape have long been rumored to have been dating, but last night’s events have seemingly squashed the rumors for good."

The article went into detail about the rumors between Lily and Severus, before finally getting to last night.

"James Potter, actor, best known in his role on the popular historical drama "Mountainside Valley', was able to catch Evans on the red carpet when her shoe broke. The footage from the cameras that were rolling by the pair has been released.

According to sources, the two are familiar with each other. Lily’s co-star, Remus Lupin is both friends with Potter and is even dating his adoptive brother Sirius Black, so we can speculate that they have met before. Based on the videos, they do seem to be familiar with each other.

What really solidified the relationship between the two actors comes from an unknown source who attended the after-party. 'She sat next to him and then a few minutes later, they left.'

Fans seem to be having a lot of mixed reactions to Evan’s alleged actions.

@snapewife45346 wrote: 'ALL LILY HAS EVER DONE IS HURT HIM. HE NEEDS TO LEAVE HER ASS FOR GOOD!!'

@snnnily394 on Twitter wrote: 'i don’t think it’s true. She would never do that to him.'

@taraisgod wrote: 'They have never said they’re in a relationship, you all are just projecting. Let her be happy!!'

@mountainbaddie wrote: 'Evans UPGRADED'

Lily set down James’s phone, unable to do anything else. She met his eyes and took a deep breath.

Her gut reaction was that it sucked. It sucked that they didn't come out on their own terms. The studio was probably pissed, or maybe they thought the bad press was good press.

But as she looked at James, sitting beside her on his side of the bed, the bed he only rarely got to occupy these days, she realized that maybe it was a blessing.

“We could deny it,” James said, a frown tugging at his lips. “Say that we’re best friends if you think that’s what the studio would want.”

Lily shook her head. “I don’t want you like a best friend. I don’t want to deny myself of you anymore.”

He smiled, soft and sweet. Lily yanked the bedsheets off of herself and crawled over to him, straddling his legs. She was only wearing a pair of knickers and one of his t-shirts. His hands immediately snuck up the shirt and caressed her hips, his thumbs teasing her panties.

“Joint statement?” he asked, as Lily leaned in. She kissed him soundly.

“In a minute,” she said, kissing him again.

[demigodreading]

If I Asked You To Stay Would You

Summary:  Alright, let me start with this. This fic is completely self-indulgent and based on some of the experiences I had been in the pride parade this year. It talks about pride protestors, asshole conservatives, homophobia, panic attack, and disassociation. I try to not be super explicit but give it the details that it deserves. Also this is my first time writing a polyamorous relationship... I’m still learning.

So here we go. Reader is in a Polyamorous relationship with Emily Prentiss and Tara Lewis. Tara Lewis is depicted as non-binary in this fic because that is what they live rent-free in my mind as. (If I ever mess up the pronouns please let me know. I briefly read through it but I am not going to claim I fixed all my mistakes.) Reader's partners take her to pride with them and while they are distracted she is confronted by protestors. Both Emily and Tara do their best to help their partner navigate through the subsequent panic attack.

Bingo Prompt: If I Asked You To Stay Would You?  For @sweetprentiss​‘ Emily Prentiss Bingo

Warnings: Protests, Homophobia, Panic Attacks, Disassociation, Asshole Conservatives, General Crowd Anxiety

Characters: Emily Prentiss, Tara Lewis, Reader. Mentions of: Penelope Garica, Spencer Reid

Relationship: Temily x Reader

Word Count: 2413 (I gave you a shortie for my last fic. This one be long for all my own self-indulgent purposes).

---------------------------------------

You were decked out in as much pride gear as you could stand as you stood in the street waiting for the parade to start. Your best friend Penelope had wanted to make sure that you were part of the crowd for your first time. You had been reluctant to go knowing that it meant large crowds and lots of people staring. It would mean your sexuality and your relationship were coming to the forefront of people’s minds. Not that you weren’t proud you were gay and in a loving polyamorous relationship. It was just nerve-wracking knowing that so many strange people would be able to see the most private part of your life and be able to do whatever they wanted with that information.

You had seen all of the protests that had gone on in years past as you laid curled up on your couch and the thought of one of those happening now terrified you. But after a year of spending time with your amazing partner and girlfriend, you wanted to be able to experience what the hype was about. However, as you stood pacing from foot to foot waiting for the parade to start you began to wonder how long this day would last. Emily grabbed your hand as you looked around you for the tenth time and placed a gentle kiss on your lips.

“You are looking around more than Tara and I do at a crime scene. You sure that you are okay being here?” Emily asked trying to read your face underneath your sunglasses, “We can leave and just celebrate pride cuddled in our bed.”

You shook your head not wanting to spoil any of the fun, “I want to be here Em. This is Tara’s first time walking with their theater group. Pen has been bugging them to do it for years. I want to be a part of this.”

“Good because I got you a flag!” Tara said bonding over to you.

They extended a black, red, and blue flag with a large golden Pi symbol out towards you. It was the polyamorous flag that you had been wanting for months now. You smiled taking the gift from your partner in your hands. You had never thought in your entire life that you would be in this loving relationship. Let alone one with two beautiful, handsome, badass FBI agents. So as Emily offered to place it around you like a cape you couldn’t help but smile and lean in to kiss each of the amazing humans for a moment. When the flag was finally secured Tara insisted on a photo. Penelope immediately accepted the offer to be camera woman and snapped a photo of Em and Tara placing a kiss on either one of your cheeks.

When the mini photo soot was done Tara, Em, and Pen all got called away by Spencer who was in a different lane of the parade. Emily promised they would be right back and the three rushed off to see their friend. As they stepped away you were immediately confronted by a man shoving a bible in your face.

“You are a sinner you know that! Kissing one woman is a crime. But two?? You are going to rot for your sins,” He spewed causing his spit to hit your arm.

“One of my partners is non-binary,” You tried to explain taking a step away from the man, “So I believe you are already mistaken in your logic.”

“Can’t make up her mind I see? Just like she can’t make her mind about you. Keeping you around like a piece of meat to have when her other sinner gets boring. You are nothing you little girl. Nothing to them.”

You couldn’t even respond any more as you slunk further into the alley behind you. You knew that he was merely a horrible bitter person but all those words he said were things you had thought before. As his friends began to swarm around him they attempted to corner you in. Just as your back hit the wall of a building two drag queens stepped in front of you holding up their flag headpieces to shield you from the men. They tried to drown out the hateful words by talking to you but you merely nodded and pressed yourself further into the wall.

A couple of moments later you could hear Em’s voice ring throughout the alleyway and the street. She was screaming you weren’t sure exactly what but you could tell she was pissed. As the loud noises continued Tara slipped past the drag queens taking you into their arms. You wrapped yourself closely to them trying your best not to let the flood of tears hidden behind your sunglasses find their escape. 

“Your partner is sure showing those protestors who is the boss here,” One of the drag queens joked.

Tara smiled and nodded, “She knows how to defend us well. Thank you for taking care of my sweet girl.”

“Anything for you darling,” The other one nodded, “We protect our own here.”

-----------------------------------------

The rest of the parade went off without a hitch as Emily and Tara stayed by your side. They held your hands the entire time and for a moment you forgot all about what that awful man had said to you. You were loved by two of the most important people in your world and that is all that mattered. But as you got behind the secured gates of the event you could still see his sign glaring at you. The more you saw it the further you slunk into your shell. Laughing when appropriate and smiling when looked at yet the feeling inside your stomach was empty. This went on for hours until the group decided it was time to leave.

“If I asked you to stay would you?” Emily said gently holding your hand, “Tara can drive Penelope home, and then you can just stay here with me till they get back.”

You shook your head no placing a gentle kiss on her cheek, “I need to go Em. It will help clear my head.”

Emily wanted to protest but she knew there was no way she was going to change your mind. She simply gave your hand another squeeze before she watched you walk towards Penelope. Pen could tell that you were a little off today but she chucked it up to your hatred of large crowds. However, Em knew that it was more than just the people that were clouding up your mind. She was worried for you. 

“You have to let them go babe. You know when she gets this way pushing her to do what we want only makes it worse,” Tara said wrapping her arms around her wife.

“But what we want her to do always helps her out in the long run!” 

Tara laughed kissing Em’s temple, “But we have to let her find that out in her own time and own way. So let’s head home and when she needs us she will call us.”

Emily groaned but still took Tara’s outstretched hand. She didn’t like waiting for you to figure things out on your own. She wanted to be the one to lead you along the way and make sure no one ever laid a hand on her precious girlfriend. Emily guessed in that sense she had failed you today. Sure the protestors didn’t get close enough to touch you physically. But they had shattered your hopeful outlook and their words had closed you off within your shell. She should have picked up on the warning signs sooner. Stayed with you no matter what. She should have just known better. 

------------------------------------------

You had successfully dropped Penelope off at her home without much of an incident. She had talked most of the way trying to get your mind of everything that was going on. It had helped for a while and you could almost feel the sadness start to peel away from you. However, on your drive home to your shared apartment, a song came on your playlist that sent you back to square one. This song always made you cry when it came on and you had promised yourself you would take it off but you never remembered. Every time you went to do it something distracted you and the thought slipped away. 

Now as the sad melody spilled through the speaker every thread you had been trying to hold together completely unraveled. You hunched over your steering wheel waiting for the light to turn green tears cascading down your face. Your breath came in short gasps threatening to stop altogether. As you turned the car your fingers began to rapidly tap the steering wheel. You tried desperately for a couple of moments to keep going determined that you could make it home. Yet the tears kept coming and you could almost feel your throat beginning to close sealing the opportunity to talk yourself through it. You knew what would come next your tapping would come to a stop and then you wouldn’t be able to move anymore. You would be frozen in fear and stuck there until someone drew you back into the real world.

So you pulled into an office building complex finding the nearest parking spot. You were working against a ticking clock and you had to reach out to your partners before it expired. In a group chat Emily had affectionately titled My Loves you typed the only text that you could get out: SOS. Not okay. Parked. 

You watched as the blue line inched across the screen and then sent. The moment it did your fingers gave out and the phone clattered to the floor. You pulled your knees to your chest and buried your head inside them. Waiting for the next step in your anxiety attack; the shaking.

---------------------------------

Emily’s phone had been set on full volume ever since you had climbed in your car. She was constantly checking your location to make sure nothing had happened. Tara would never admit it but they had checked themselves once or twice when Emily wasn’t looking. Emily and Tara had just completely undressed from pride and into their comfy around-the-house clothes when the text pinged on their phones. Without a second thought, Tara grabbed their car keys and rushed for the door. Emily followed closely behind shoving the spare key to your car in her pocket and then hopped into the passenger seat.

As they drove Tara’s guilt began to rise and they gripped their hands around the steering wheel. Emily gently placed her hand on their thigh, “Y/N is going to be fine babe.”

“No! She isn’t. She is probably halfway through a panic attack and you know how bad it gets. We should have gone with her. I shouldn’t have tried to stop you. This whole thing has gone horribly wrong.”

“Tara, my love,” Em soothed, “You were right when you told me earlier that we couldn’t stop her. Y/N is strong-willed and stubborn. That is why we both love her so much. She did the best she could and now she needs our help. We can do this.”

Tara nodded and then pointed towards your parked car. As they pulled up next to it they peered inside the window looking at your ball-shaped form. Tara suppressed their tears as they turned off the car, “We are past the shaking but we still might be able to coax them out of it. Did you bring the spare key?”

Emily nodded unlocking the door and then slipping into the passenger seat. Tara opened the driver’s side door slowly and posted themselves into the open space. Emily began calling out to you repeating your name, nicknames, who was in the car, anything to try and get you to hear what was going on. It took about five minutes but finally, you heard her voice and you gently lifted your head up. 

“There is our beautiful sweetheart. Remember Tara is in the doorway behind you so don’t get alarmed. It’s just us,” Emily consoled, “Can I touch you?”

You went to speak but no words came out. You so desperately wanted to speak but there was nothing you could do. You couldn’t even move your head to shake yes or no. Your eyes grew with fear as you continued to look at your girlfriend.

“It’s okay Y/N, don’t try to force it. Just do one long blink for no and two for yes.”

You responded with two long blinks and Em gently placed her hand against your back Tara doing the same. It took a couple of minutes but you finally warmed up to their touch and your limbs began to unravel. When you finally could move Tara leaned down and gently took you into their arms. Em opened the back door of their car and letting Tara slide both of you inside. Once you both were settled Tara placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. You laid your head on their chest and fluttered your eyes closed. 

When you got home Tara lifted you into the bedroom and laid you gently down onto the covers. You watched as Em and Tara moved to grab anything and everything that you may need. All of your pride gear was taken off, your comfort show turned on the TV, and a weighted blanket placed on top of you. Once you were more adjusted Emily and Tara curled against you placing kisses on your forehead and cheeks.

Finally, you were able to speak again but your voice came out barely above a whisper, “Are you mad at me?”

“Oh baby,” Emily said hugging you close, “Why would we be mad at you?”

“Because I had a panic attack and should have just let you take care of me,” You said twiddling your fingers together.

Tara placed their hand in yours stopping the anxious movements, “Darling, of course not. You did your best and when you needed our help you did the appropriate thing and got us to help. That is what matters.”

“I promise Y/N, Tara and I love you more than anything in this entire world. Nothing will ever change that.”

Your partners placed a gentle kiss on the top of your head at the same time as you nodded. A couple of moments passed before you were able to drift off to sleep your head placed on Emily’s chest and your hand entangled in Tara’s.

[hamliet]

The Girl Who Gets to Have It All: Buffy Summers

So with @linkspooky​‘s encouragement, I have binged Buffy the Vampire Slayer and relived my childhood culture. And, it's a 10/10 for me. Not that it doesn't have flaws, but it's genuinely one of the best stories I've seen, with consistent character arcs, powerful themes, and a beautiful message. It's also like... purportedly about vampires and demons and superpowered chosen ones, but it's actually all about humanity.

Buffy was able to be a teenage girl, allowed to like the things teen girls are scorned for (boys, shopping, etc), to be insecure about the thing teenage girls are insecure about (future careers, dating, school, parents), and to be a superhero with its good and its bad aspects. The story wasn’t afraid to call Buffy on her flaws (sometimes she got in a very ‘I am the righteous chosen one’ mode) and to respect and honor each of her desires (to be a good person, to be loved, and more). The story listened to what she wanted and respected her desires, giving her the challenges needed to overcome her flaws while also never teaching her a lesson about wanting bad boys or romance is silly or any manner of dark warnings stories like to throw at teenage girls. 

It respected teenage girls--nerdy girls like Willow, jocks like Buffy, lonely wallflowers with trauma like Dawn, and popular/snobby ones like Cordelia, girls gone wild like Faith. It never once reduced them to the stereotypes that were lurking right there: each character was fully rounded, human, flawed and yet with respected interests and goals. This is so rare for a story that I’m still in awe. 

The story as a whole follows Buffy from 15 to 21, of her as she grows from teenager to adult. She acts like a teenager and grows to act like a young adult, wrestling with loneliness and duty. The adults, like Giles, Joyce, and Jenny, are not perfect either, but neither are they “bad parents” or “bad mentors” necessarily. Joyce in particular says something terrible to Buffy, but she tries to do better, and it’s rare to see a parent in YA stories shown with such nuance. Basically, it wrote the long-lasting adult characters as human beings, too. 

Speaking of growing up, I appreciated how Buffy’s love interests mirrored this. Angel was someone Buffy loved and admired, wanted to be like, but who was always either extreme good or extreme bad, and combined with Buffy’s own tendencies towards black-white thinking, made for a beautiful relationship to help her grow, but didn’t necessarily form a foundation for a long-term partner. Spike, on the other hand... they both saw each other at their worst and were drawn to each other even then, and were inspired to become better because they couldn’t bear to be a person who treated the other person so wrongly. They pushed each other to become the best them they could be, and believed in each other. Also, Spuffy is an enemies to lovers ship for the ages. 

(Also, most of the other ships were well-done or at least can be understood. Riley was very obviously wrong for Buffy which paralleled Harmony and Spike in being 100% wrong for each other. Cordelia and Xander were a fun ship even if we all knew it would never last, and Willow and Oz were beautiful and cute. But Xander and Anya and Willow and Tara? OTPs. As were Giles and Jenny, the librarian and the computer teacher.) 

That said, it’s not a perfect series. No story is. All of the characters and ships had problematic aspects to them worthy of critique, and the writing is very 90s in a lot of ways. It’s a product of its time, and in many ways it’s good society has progressed beyond some of the tropes/metaphors used in the show. In other way, though, the show was ahead of its time, and in a good way it wasn’t bound by the fear of purity policing with its takes on redemption (many characters would never fly today). 

So, in order of seasons ranked from my very favorite to my “still enjoyed it very much” (no season was actually bad, imo), here’s my review. I’ll also review my top 10 villains in the show, because Buffy does villains very well in terms of the redeemable and irredeemable.  

Season 7:  Yep, the final season was my favorite. 

Overall Opinion: Buffy's finale is literally "f*ck them men, our power is ours" and while it seems cheesy it actually works (also, f*ck in both a literal and figurative sense). The series strongly hit all the themes: love as strength, and redemption. Buffy consistently shows love as her strength--*all* kinds of love. Friendship w Willow/Xander, familial with Joyce/Dawn, romantic with Spike/Angel. These types of love are also never pitted against each other as is so often the case in current-day media. It's beautiful. Also, Spike’s confrontation with Wood was so powerful in terms of exploring forgiveness, redemption, and reconciliation: where they overlap and where they don't, and what it means to move forward. 

Unpopular Opinion: I have seen a lot didn’t like the inclusion of Potential Slayers, and while I agree they could have been better incorporated/characterized, it was a great way to show Buffy’s final stage of growing up to be ending her chosen one status and projecting/multiplying her powers over the world. 

Biggest Critique: Kennedy was female Riley--the anti-Tara to Riley’s anti-Angel (by ‘anti’ I mean opposite in every way). Kennedy was annoying and immature. Her role, like Riley’s, was less about exploring her as a character and more about her just being stamped as “love interest: lesbian.” 

Favorite Episodes: Beneath You, Lies My Parents Told Me, Touched, Chosen

Season 6: 

Overall Opinion: I said this on Twitter, but I felt like this was Buffy’s The Last Jedi or Empire Strikes Back moment. It is polarizing and dark, deconstructing the tropes it stands on--but by digging to the core of these tropes, it actually makes what’s good about them shine brighter. Everyone’s enemy was the worst versions of themselves. Giles left Buffy, Willow's struggle to relate to the world led to her trying to destroy it, Buffy hurt everyone through her anger, Xander abandoned Anya at the altar, Spike... yeah. It ages well as an integral part of the story, and the Trio were eerily prophetic. 

Unpopular Opinion: Dawn is a great character with a good arc. A traumatized teen acting out and struggling to come to terms with loss and identity? She wasn’t whiny; she was realistic. 

Biggest Critique: Willow’s addiction coding (I’ll discuss this below) and Seeing Red as an episode. I see the argument for both of its controversial scenes from a narrative perspective: Willow starts the season not grieving Buffy but instead being determined to fix it with magic and needs to learn to grieve, but. Still. Bury your gays is not a good look. For the Spike scene... he conflates sex/passion and violence (”love is blood, children” is something he said way back in season 3), but like Tara’s death, it had more to do with Spike (as Tara’s death did for Willow) than with Buffy’s arc, and as for the actual execution... they really botched that. Did it like... have to go on that long or go that far? No. Also, the framing was good, but inconsistent with the rest of the series (Xander to Buffy in the hyena episode, Faith to Xander and to Riley, etc.) 

Favorite Episodes: Once More With Feeling, Smashed, Grave

Season 3 (tied with Season 5):

Overall Opinion: The opening continuity of Buffy meeting Lily/Anne after saving her life in Season 2 was sweet. The Witchhunt episode had really powerful subtext: stories of deaths that aren’t even true are actually demons that possess the town and convince them to turn against their children in the name of protecting the children. It’s a good commentary on, oh, everything in society. Faith’s character arc was fantastic, and her chemistry with Buffy was off the charts (look, I may be Spuffy all the way, but Fuffy has rights). The finale was satisfying in so many ways, seeing the entire graduating class unite to destroy the Mayor and the school with it, symbolizing Buffy et al’s readiness to move on to college. Oz's relationship with Willow was very sweet and meaningful for a first romance for Willow. 

Unpopular Opinion: I actually don’t really have one. Maybe that the miracle in Amends was earned? I think you can make a decent case that Season 3 is the best written of the seasons, but can only truly be thematically appreciated to its full potential in the light of subsequent seasons (which finish Faith’s arc and deconstruct Buffy’s).  

Biggest Critique: It forgot Buffy killed the hyena guy in Season 1, making her continual insistence that she can’t kill people very ????? 

Favorite Episodes: Lovers Walk, Amends, Graduation Day Part 2 

Season 5, which ties with Season 3:

Overall Opinion: The entire season is about family and what it means, from Tara’s to Buffy’s to the Scoobies. I loved Glory aka Enoshima Junko as the Big Bad, I loved Dawn’s interesting meta commentary on retconning (like, the fact that she’s retconned in matters), and most of my ships are still alive. Joyce’s relationship with Spike is one of the most heartwarming aspects, and Spike’s arc’s desire is clearly highlighted: he wants to be seen as a person. The episodes after Joyce’s death are the most honest portrayals of grief I’ve ever seen, and absolutely brutal to watch. 

Unpopular Opinion: Buffy’s choice at the end seems a deliberate inversion of her choice at the end of Season 2 (sacrifice a loved one to save the world), but it actually isn’t: much like at the end of Season 2 where Buffy skips town because she’s devastated after killing Angel and doesn’t want to sort out being expelled, her mom knowing she’s the slayer, and her own trauma, Buffy’s sacrifice here was as much about her wanting the easy way out of relationships, family, college, etc. as it was about saving Dawn. Buffy’s death is coded as a suicide, which Season 6 emphasizes as well. 

Biggest Critique: Like Season 3, I don’t have a lot to critique here. I wish the suicidal coding had been a little more obvious in Season 5 itself, but also I’m not sure it could have been more obvious; it’s pretty apparent if you pay attention. Maybe also that Buffy and Riley’s relationship failing should have been more squarely blamed on Riley, you know, being insecure and cheating. 

Favorite Episodes: Family, Fool for Love, Intervention. 

Season 2:

Overall Opinion: Heartbreakingly tragic but exciting and revealing at the same time. It asked the viewer interesting questions about redemption and forgiveness and atonement through Angel being honest about his past, and then decided to show us his past now reenacted, challenging us. And still, we saw them save him in a parallel to saving Willow in Season 6 (but Season 2 was tragic because it wasn’t enough, while Season 6 was not). Jenny’s death was agonizing, and the scene were Angel watches Buffy, Willow, and Joyce get the news through the window was powerful. We didn’t have to hear them to get the grief. 

Unpopular Opinion: Jenny’s death isn’t a fridging; it works for her arc too when you consider her history. She worked to save the person whose life she was tasked to ruin, and it cost her her own--yet she still succeeded, because Jenny brought joy and wisdom to the show. Kendra’s death, on the other hand... was because they needed the stakes to be high--but we already knew that before she died. So, her death was useless. 

Biggest Critique: The subtext was Not It. It was essentially “do not have sex. Your older boyfriend will lose his soul, kill your friends, you’ll lose your family, your school, your home, and have to kill your true love or else hell will literally swallow earth.” 

Favorite Episodes: School Hard, Passion, Becoming Part 2.

Season 1:

Overall Opinion: I really liked it; it’s just lower on this list because the others are just better. It’s a great introduction to the series and to its characters, from Giles to Buffy to Willow to Jenny to Cordelia. It has great subtext a lot of the time (for example, Natalie French as She-Mantis is a literal predatory bug who engages in predatory behavior with students). Additionally, it subverts the typical YA trope of two guys and a girl, in which the girl is usually the least interesting character. Buffy and Willow were both fully fledged characters from the beginning with distinct strengths (even before Willow became a witch, as she wasn’t one in season 1 yet), while Xander was the more ordinary of the group. 

Unpopular Opinion/Biggest Critique: Xander’s arc showed its first flaws that unfortunately continued throughout the series: his writing was either very good or very indulgent in ways it never was for other characters.  (cough, the hyena episode, cough, in which he gets to skirt responsibility--and acknowledges that he is skirting it--for something the show will later hold others to account for). Xander’s just kind of inconsistent, which weakened his character over all. (Which is why both his love interests--Cordelia and then ultimately Anya--were good for him: they did not indulge him.) 

Favorite Episode: Witch, Nightmares. 

Season 4:

Overall Opinion: it’s still a good season. It’s a good portrayal of college and the growing pains of branching out, the strains of college growth on relationships (romantic and platonic). It shows us the first hints of Spuffy, giving us some serious Jungian symbolism between Spike and Buffy early on, and does well in establishing Xander/Anya and Willow/Tara as beautiful OTPs. Faith and Buffy’s foiling is fantastic. The Halloween episode was very fun as well. However, it suffers because its Big Bad, Adam, is not all that compelling thematically--yet, he could have been. See, the final battle pulls off the Power of Friendship in a really strong way but notably the season does not end there. Instead, it ends on dreams of each character’s worst fears, continuing what we saw in Nightmares in Season 1. Why? Because it shows us that the characters’ wars aren’t against monsters, but monsters of their own making: their flaws. Adam, as a literal Frankenstein, exemplifies this, but it wasn’t capitalized on as well as it could have been. 

Unpopular Opinion: Beer Bad isn’t a bad episode, at the very least because Buffy gets to punch Parker. It’s not one of the series’ best, obviously, but it does give Buffy an arc in that she gets her daydream of Parker begging her to come back, but she has overcome that desire and her desire for revenge. If we wanna talk about bad subtext in Season 4, Season 2′s Not It sex subtext continues in the Where the Wild Things Are episode in this season; it’s a powerful callout of abusive purity-culture churches, until the fact that the shame creates a literal curse undermines the progressive message it’s supposed to send. Also, the Thanksgiving episode (Pangs) is a nightmare of white guilt and Oh God Shut Up White People. 

Biggest Critique: Riley is awful. Like Kennedy, he had “love interest:normal” stamped on him and that was it. The thing is, he could have worked as an Angel foil, representative of the normal-life aspect of Buffy to Angel’s vampire/supernatural aspect, but the writers never explore this and seemed to even try to back away from that later on. They threw all the romantic cliches at the wall to see what sticks, from klutzy “I dropped my schoolbooks, that’s how we met” to cliché lines that had me rolling my eyes. Do you know how bad a romance has to be to make me dislike romantic tropes? 

Favorite Episodes: Fear Itself, Hush, Restless

Villain rankings: 

Dark Willow, the only villain to be truly sympathetic. While the addiction coding was insensitive and, while unsurprising for its time, aged extremely poorly. That said, Willow’s turn to the dark side after Tara’s death worked well for her character and the story: it was believable and paid off what had been building since Season 1's “Nightmares” episode (Willow’s inferiority complex). 

Glory managed to be genuinely terrifying, and humorous/enjoyable too. Her minions and their numerous nicknames for Glorificus were hilarious, as was her intense vanity. Her merging with Ben--a human being who genuinely wanted to be kind and good--added complexity and tragedy to her role. 

The First. A really good take on Satan. The seventh season as well as the First’s first appearance in season 3′s “Amends” had kind of blatant Christian symbolism, and so the First being essentially Satan works. Their disguising themselves as dead loved ones and the subtle manipulation they used to alienate people was really disturbing and well done. 

The Mayor, who was a terrible person but a truly good father. He provided an interesting contrast to the normal ‘bad dad’ bad guy character, in that he provided Faith exactly what the other characters refused to: he saw the best in her and offered her parental support, while the heroes didn’t and wound up pushing her away. 

The Trio, who were villains ahead of their time: whiny fanboy reddit dudebros, basically. The stakes seemed so much lower than fighting Glory, a literal god, the previous season. But that’s why they worked so well for Season 6′s human themes, and were especially disturbing because we all know people like them. I also appreciated the surprisingly sensitive takes on Jonathan and Andrew, who got to redeem themselves, but Warren did not, and I don’t think he should have either. 

Angelus + Drusilla. I’m ranking them below the Trio because Angelus was just sooooo different from Angel that it was difficult for me to feel the same way for him. He was still Angel, so it wasn’t possible to enjoy his villainy, but he also wasn’t nearly as sympathetic as Dark Willow, had no redeeming qualities like the Mayor, and wasn’t as disturbingly realistic as the Trio. However, the emotional stakes were excellently executed with him as the Big Bad, in that you were never quite sure how to feel and it just plain hurt. Also, Drusilla was a favorite recurring character. She was sympathetic and yet batsh*t enough to be enjoyable as a villain at the same time. 

The Master, who was just completely camp and really worked as an introductory villain. He was scary enough to believe he was a threat, and was funny enough to introduce the series’ humor as well. He was, like Glory, an enjoyable Big Bad. 

The Gentlemen, the one-off villains of Season 4′s Hush who were genuinely terrifying. It’s not as if they got a lot of explanation or any backstory, but they didn’t need it. 

Caleb, the misogynist priest. Fitting with the First’s Christian symbolism, Caleb serving as a spokesperson of all bad religious beliefs felt appropriate. He was also a good foil to Warren--being actually supernaturally powered instead of a wannabe--and to Tara’s family in being full-out evil. I despised him. 

Snyder. Okay Snyder is not a Big Bad like Adam is, but let’s face it: Adam is lame compared to the other villains. But Snyder as a principal? He was so irritating and yet really well used in the series to critique overly strict, hypocritical teachers. Like, we all know teachers like him. I loved to hate him, and his ending was so satisfying. 

[twh-news]

‘Loki’: Behind the Scenes of the Crumbling Time Variance Authority

Find out what Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Wunmi Mosaku, Owen Wilson, and Tara Strong all have to say about the TVA.

by Rachel Paige

[spoilers to Loki S01E04]

The Time Variance Authority sure seems like a cool and fun place to work! That is...until you start peeling back the layers of the previously unseen and unheard-of organization, and realize that they’ve been lying to everyone this entire time. Welcome to the TVA, y’all!

In Episode 4 of Marvel Studios’ Loki, “The Nexus Event," the truth starts to come out, and when it rains at the TVA, it pours. Where to even begin?

For starters, the Time Keepers did not create everyone working at the TVA, and it turns out the employees walking the halls and filing paperwork are all variants — with their memories scrubbed, of course. And if that’s not enough to swallow, the Time Keepers are actually robots and completely useless figureheads. Oh, and Mobius and Loki find themselves pruned at the hands of Judge Renslayer. That’s still just scratching the tip of the TVA iceberg!

So what’s it like when everything you thought you knew about your job turns out to be a lie? Marvel.com chatted with Gugu Mbatha-Raw (Judge Ravonna Renslayer), Wunmi Mosaku (Hunter B-15), Owen Wilson (Agent Mobius), and Tara Strong (the voice of Miss Minutes) about bringing the TVA to life, and what happens next in the series.

JUDGE RAVONNA RENSLAYER

Renslayer wasn’t always sitting behind a big desk in a big office at the TVA. “She has worked her way up to the top. She wasn't born into power. She started as a Hunter,” Mbatha-Raw tells Marvel.com. As viewers see at the start of Episode 4, Renslayer was the Hunter tasked with grabbing the Loki variant — aka Sylvie — from her timeline to stand trial.

Now that she’s in a higher position, she’s not going to veer off her straight and narrow path.

"She's really worked hard to get where she is, so she's not going to be reckless with the power that has been hard-earned for her,” Mbatha-Raw continues. “She, in some ways, is deeply indoctrinated with the ways of the TVA. She's completely conditioned by their thinking and the idea of the Sacred Timeline, and the concept of free will is quite alien to her. She's a believer. She believes in law and order, and it's done quite well for her so far in terms of getting her to where she is. She's not going to abandon her philosophy lightly.”

We see this in action when Renslayer realizes that Mobius has gone behind her back trying to get to the bottom of what happened to Hunter C-20. After a meeting with Renslayer, Mobius swipes her TemPad and discovers that the young Hunter was questioned, and in the process confessed that she knew they were all variants. And the person interviewing her? None other than Renslayer herself, who ends the interview abruptly. This is the sort of information Renslayer does not want to get out.

“It was fun to start off with everything being sort of very orderly and black-and-white for Renslayer. As her reality begins to crumble, we discover that alongside her. She has put everything into this. This is her whole world. Her career is her life.”

Renslayer isn’t going to let anything and anyone stand in the way of what she’s worked hard to accomplish, and that includes Mobius. Mobius tries to confront his superior about Hunter C-20, the variants, and the TVA, and in a shocking twist, Renslayer orders the agent pruned for being compromised!

“Her only friend, really, is Mobius, and she kind of betrays him,” Mbatha-Raw says. “Or she sees it as he betrayed her, and they have this massive schism. And you sort of think, gosh, where is she going to go now? Who's going to be in her corner? Who's she going to have a drink with at the end of the day. It's a lot of stress!”

HUNTER B-15

Someone else who has led their entire life believing in the TVA and what it stands for is Hunter B-15. The part of no-nonsense Hunter, originally written as a male character, ultimately went to Mosaku after her audition.

While reading the dummy sides (fake scenes for the audition), Mosaku and director Kate Herron determined the gender didn’t alter who Hunter B-15 is at the root of the character. “Despite being written a man, Hunter B-15 is a Hunter and works for the TVA. It didn’t change the scripts. I have free reign because she's new. B-15 doesn't exist in the MCU, so I really got to start from scratch and explore different ideas and themes, and take her wherever Kate and I wanted to.”

But, one thing the character couldn’t do? Be swayed by Loki’s charms. Mosaku was excited to step into this role, and not take any nonsense from Loki.

“It's very rare to have a [character], especially as a woman, [who doesn’t want to be] sweeter, nicer, or make people like you. She's not interested in that at all. And therefore, she's not interested in [Loki] — and Loki is very interested in that. He's charming and all that stuff, and it's all about luring you in. She just doesn't take any of it. It's not attractive to her. It's not intriguing to her. She's just, ‘Let's get the job done, please.’”

While Hunter B-15 starts off all commanding and tough, slowly she, too, begins to realize that not everything is what it seems at the TVA. After she’s enchanted by Sylvie at Roxxcart, Hunter B-15 has memories come rushing back to her — but what are they, and what did she see? That’s still a mystery for Mosaku, too, who explains, “I'm as intrigued as you are to find out what that backstory is.”

Whatever she saw, it propels her to take a stand against the TVA. This meant Mosaku went through training — in more ways than one, “They drilled us on the physical vocabulary of the TVA and the fight sequences that we had.”

At the end of Episode 4, Hunter B-15 comes to Loki and Sylvie’s aid when they come face to face with the Time Keepers, throwing the latter her machete (which she’s clearly stolen from Renslayer’s office). What follows next is a battle for power in front of the Time Keepers, one in which not everyone survives.

“We did have a trainer to make sure that we were physically capable of doing it all and not injuring ourselves,” states Mosaku. “I really loved that, because I love to box. I felt really strong and able to use my physical power in a way that I hadn't been able to before.”

MOBIUS

Agent Mobius is having a day. Not only is he watching his whole life and career crumble around him, but he then winds up on the wrong end of a pruning stick by the end of the episode. While he might have started off as a through and through company man when we first meet him, after Loki tells him they’re all variants, Mobius starts to think about where his true allegiance lies. (And if he ever had a jet ski??)

The biggest revelation in the episode for Mobius is not necessarily that he’s a variant, but rather that his closest friend, Renslayer, has been concealing the truth from him this whole time.

“The relationship between Mobius and Renslayer, it's the way you might have with your boss. Or when you're back in school with the principal or someone in a position of authority and having to sort of try to charm them so you're able to pursue your projects,” Wilson tells Marvel.com. “That's the dynamic between Mobius and Renslayer. She sort of loses patience with Mobius and with another one of his schemes. But, I think, she also sort of enjoys that he's a little bit of a rascal.”

That certainly might have been true at one point in time, but after Mobius swipes Renslayer’s TemPad, as Wilson continues, “by the end of that relationship, it has become something very different”

Mobius might have caught Renslayer in a lie, but it’s Renslayer who orders him pruned — and Loki witnesses the whole thing.

"The betrayal of Mobius by Renslayer is pretty shocking. And it's a little bit of a hall of mirrors within the whole series, that people aren't quite who they seem to be. In the same way that Loki, when he lands in this bizarre place called the TVA, Mobius will have sort of the same struggles. What is this organization? And is it something that is worthy of his devotion?”

MISS MINUTES

There’s one other very important person at the TVA: Miss Minutes! She’s not really a recording, and she’s not really alive, she’s sorta both! So what’s going to happen to the organization’s spokesperson as the TVA starts to fall apart?

Coy with her response, Tara Strong, who voices the perky clock, explains, “It's safe to say that Miss Minutes knows absolutely everything, and it's also safe to say I wouldn't mess with her too much.”

Recording for the character, Strong actually watched episodes (over video chat), and synched up her dialogue with the action in each scene.

“The show was already done before I stepped in, which was such a great gift,” she explains. “Had I gone first and watched a placeholder, it wouldn't have been as magical. But getting to sit there and witness the animation, and how cute it is and how stylized it was, and of course, to play off Tom Hiddleston, who's so brilliant, it was really a gift to have it all come together in front of me.”

For every scene, Strong recorded dozens of different versions of dialogue “to play with for the production crew to see what would fit in the best and what would make the most sense.” As the show was coming together, Strong knew she had the difficult task of giving Miss Minutes life and unloading “exposition while still making it fun and playful.”

“Everything she says is important and funny and interesting. I also love that even in the very beginning, when she's like, [Miss Minutes’ voice] ‘Don't hesitate to let us know how we're doing. We could explode you in a minute, but drop a line to let us know how you feel about it!’ It's like the perfect mix of who she is that she can be giving you such dire information with a smile on her face, and you still want to sit down and have a cupcake with her.”

Considering what she knows, and how many times she’s now dumped information, how else might she be able to step in and help Loki?

“She knows so much about the TVA, and it’s her job to relay this information to Loki,” says Strong. “[She needs] him to get past some of the things he's done [in order] to improve himself as a member of this universe, and how to grow and help. I [navigate] these moments with him, careful to not give away how much I actually know in the world.”

[comradesummers]

Top 5 buffy characters and top 5 angel characters?

Hi, thanks for asking!

Pretty sure that I’ve answered some version of this before but I’m not going to pretend I’m even remotely consistent about these things, so here we are.

Buffy Characters:

5. Rupert Giles

Giles is one of those characters that frustrates me a lot. He’s part of an inherently exploitative system and I’m not sure that, until the final episode, he ever truly extricates himself from that system. The best parts of Giles are his rebellion against the council and the worst parts of him are his ideological ties to them. But that’s what makes him so interesting. Because the man who defies what he’s been taught and loves this group of misfit children like a father is always at odds with the ruthless utilitarian he thinks he has to be. It’s a fascinating series long conflict, and though it’s not always handled as well as I would like, it does always make for a wonderfully flawed but thoroughly lovable character.

4. Willow Rosenberg

Willow is a character I struggle with because she’s the one that reminds me the most of myself. Some of these similarities are rather superficial: we’re both Jewish lesbians that pride ouselves on our academic merits. But on a deeper level, I find Willow’s insecurity and her desperate need to appear strong and important and worthy at all costs to be so painfully relatable that I have a hard time engaging with her at all. I don’t need to explain how incredible her storyline is over seven seasons, how much she grows and changes and evolves, because you know all that already. There’s no denying she’s an incredible character. And the fact that she resonates so deeply with me to the point that she makes me uncomfortable is maybe the best demonstration of what a good character she is.

3. Faith Lehane

Faith was initially introduced as the dark mirror to Buffy (which is why I believe her to be fundamentally tied to BtVS in a way that she isn’t to AtS). But her great accomplishment throughout Buffy and Angel was her evolution into her own character, separate from Buffy. And that’s also Faith’s character arc. At first, she is only able to compare herself with Buffy. She’s angry and jealous of Buffy because she believes that Buffy has everything that she never had and rightfully deserves. And, in many ways, she’s right to be angry. Yet her choice to direct her anger and resentment towards Buffy, as opposed to the real culprits (the council for one, along with all of the adults in her life) is what leads her to destroy herself. It’s only after she’s able to recognize her own self-worth outside of Buffy that she can truly do good and be good and be with Buffy. It’s a remarkable journey to behold and I love her so much.

2. Tara Maclay

I liked Tara well enough before season 6, but season 6 was when I fell completely in love with her. She becomes the show’s anchor that season as the only responsible adult who’s making good decisions, even when those decisions are extremely painful for her, like breaking up with Willow. And in a season dedicated to every other character fucking up, she’s truly a breath of fresh air. But more than just her function as a contrast to the other characters, season 6 really emphasized for me how beautifully and subtly she had developed throughout the show. Her ability to stand up to Willow is such a stark contrast to the Tara who was unable to stand up to her father (not that I’m blaming her for not being able to confront her abuser, I’m just pointing out how the contrast between these scenes demonstrates amazing growth on Tara’s part). Tara initially has no sense of self-worth, but as she develops, she comes to understand her own value and refuses to allow anyone to diminish it. It’s a beautiful, lovely story, and I will forever be bitter that she didn’t get the happy ending she so richly deserved.

1. Buffy Summers

Buffy Summers is my favorite fictional character of all time, as is evident by pretty much every single post on this blog.

Angel Characters:

5. Winfred Burkle

I have some issues with Fred. This is mainly because Joss Whedon’s obsession with this particular type of nerdy and adorable female characters makes me uncomfortable. But Amy Acker is a great actress and I can’t help but find her charming regardless. I think the episode that really sold me on Fred was Fredless. Like, the idea that she can’t face her parents because she doesn’t want to admit to them or to herself what she’s gone through is really heartbreaking. It’s the first time I was able to see Fred as more of a character than a caricature and I realized that I really liked that character. Also, fuck the writers for killing off their only remaining female character just so that Wesley could manpain about it.

4. Lilah Morgan

Lilah is by far the best villain on the show. She was, with very few exceptions, one of the only bad guys who was actually fun to watch. I particularly love that the writers never felt the need to redeem her in order to make her sympathetic. And she is sympathetic. You feel for her a whole lot, probably because Stephanie Romanov is such a pro. But she’s still a terrible, evil person through and through and I love that for her. Why the writers thought it would be a good idea to kill her off is truly beyond me.

3. Lorne

Another character who deserved better (sensing a theme here). Lorne is such an interesting, layered character with a wonderfully bizarre backstory and an interesting way of seeing the world. Yet, despite how wonderful he is, he was always pushed to the background to further another character’s story. And that’s not even mentioning whatever the writers thought they were doing with him in season 5. Also, why couldn’t he have been openly queer? Anyway, RIP Andy Hallet, who was an absurdly talented man who managed to create this incredible character in spite of all the writers’ bullshit. 

2. Charles Gunn

Gunn was never just the muscle. The man ran a neighborhood watch/vampire hunting ring while he was still in his early 20′s (I assume? Do we actually know how old he is?). He’s a strategist and a leader in his community. He’s funny and charming and a good man and he deserved so much more love and care and development because he’s truly a fascinating character. But all the writers saw was a black guy who made quips and I am still so angry about it. Anyway, I love Gunn, he is, by far, the best man on the show and possibly in the entirety of the Buffyverse.

1. Cordelia Chase

Cordelia was pretty much the only reason I decided to watch Angel. She’s the best part of the whole show, her character growth is absolutely phenomenal, and I love how she grows as a person while still remaining wholly herself. I love her so much and I’ll forever be bitter about what the writers did to her and how terribly Whedon treated Charisma Carpenter.

[unitchiefs-blackbirdphoenix]

Maybe In Another Life...

Summary: JJ is jealous of Andrew Mendoza because he has Emily and she doesn’t. Loosely from 15x07 "Rusty". Major spoilers if you haven’t seen it yet.

Jemily fic, but it’s a little bit of a sad one. I apologize in advance for breaking any hearts :(

Also big thanks to @bridget19 for beta-reading this!!

Read on AO3

Emily walked into her office and saw a bouquet of flowers on her desk. She saw a little red card in the bouquet and looked at the writing on it.

Thinking of you. - Andrew

Reaching for her phone in her bag, she saw her boyfriend’s name on the screen. Of course. She contemplated answering after four rings and sighed before tapping on the red circle to reject his call.

Emily didn’t know exactly where her relationship with Andrew Mendoza stood. This was a whole new experience for her because, sure, he’s a good guy, but is he really the one for her? She never did well in long-term relationships because of her trust and commitment issues. Emily always felt like someone could never love her enough to stay with her in the long run.

She sat down in her chair and heard a light knock at her office door. It was JJ giving her a bright smile and walking towards her desk.

“Morning,” the blonde greeted. “Another day, another dollar,” she sat on the armrest of the chair in front of it.

“Yep. Good old fashioned government dollar,” Emily joked.

“I can see Garcia hit up her favorite coffee truck on her way to work.”

“I had to cut her off,” Emily said. Garcia was more energetic than usual talking about the show they both watched, something about a blonde agent getting injured and professing her undying love to her female boss.

JJ smiled and nodded. “Wait, don’t you have a budget meeting this morning?”

Emily checked her watch. “Uh, yes, I do.”

JJ nodded again and drawled out, “Emily…”

The unit chief looked up and raised her eyebrows, “Yeah?”

“You buried the lead. Flowers?”

Emily hesitantly nodded.

“That Andrew Mendoza’s a keeper…” JJ teased.

“Mhmm,” Emily forced out a response as she stood from her chair, grabbing her black binder and phone for the FBI budget meeting.

“Can’t be late for that meeting,” she told the blonde as she made her way out of her office, tapping her shoulder with the binder.

“Mhmm,” JJ responded with a closed-mouth smile, watching Emily leave. She looked back at the flowers Andrew sent to Emily and her smile quickly faded away. JJ observed them with narrowed eyes, gripping the back of the chair a little tighter and harder than normal.

For a group of profilers, rarely anyone noticed JJ’s jealousy towards Andrew. When it came to the team’s love lives, she’d always smirked because it was just too fun to tease them about.

She reminded herself on many occasions that she had Will and her boys. Don’t get her wrong, she loves her family and has always made them one of her biggest priorities in life. But JJ also knew she would be a lot happier, if she shared her life with Emily Prentiss.

God, to be married to Emily Prentiss.

JJ smiled wistfully at the thought of being married to her. She would be so good with her sons. JJ knew Emily wanted to provide the maternal care she never had growing up, and imagined her giving that to Henry and Michael. Emily was also very loving and always listened to JJ’s problems, every rant and issue she had.

JJ knew Mendoza was a good guy. He’s good for Emily. The blonde bit her lip and stood from the armrest she was sitting on. She looked at the flowers again when she neared the door and took a slow deep breath, sighing. After a few more seconds, JJ left Emily’s office in sadness.

----------------------

The next day, the team was on the jet, going over the case with Garcia on video chat. The BAU had been called on another case and they had an unsub decapitating male victims and collecting their heads. They looked through their file folders for more details on their unsub’s victims, and all of a sudden, the tech analyst chimed in with a comment.

“Shut the front door. Andrew Mendoza signed this report.” Everyone’s heads shot up at her remark. “Andrew Mendoza is Prentiss’s boyfriend. He’s the head of the Denver field office?”

“Uh, yes,” Emily reluctantly replied. “He has been for the past, uh, two months. Um, his daughter and ex-wife moved to Colorado a year ago, and he'd been waiting for a transfer so he could be closer to Keely. She starts high school soon, so…”

Emily felt like she had just divulged a little too much to the team, and kept her mouth shut after receiving the awkward silence from them. She knew the case was in Denver, which was where Andrew was, but she wanted to keep her personal and work lives separate.

“But you guys are, um, you’re good?” Luke’s voice broke through.

“Yeah, yeah. It’s all good,” Emily nodded. Well, it was a half-lie because she didn't know.

Spencer looked at JJ, then Emily, then back to JJ. He studied her facial expression go from surprise, jealousy, amusement, to heartbreak. He didn’t know if the others noticed, but he trained his eyes on her when Penelope had mentioned Andrew.

JJ had been shot by Everett Lynch’s daughter, Grace, about a month ago. While in the hospital, she had told Spencer the truth about her confession she made to the unsub who made her play truth or dare the week before: that she was really in love with Emily. JJ thought if she was about to die in that situation, she had already trusted Spencer enough to keep that secret. The younger co-worker figured it wasn’t meant for him once he saw how she kept glancing over at Emily at Rossi's wedding, especially when JJ paid extra attention to her during the twin flames speech.

JJ had her head down as she quietly scanned through the file again the entire time. She frowned and her eyes were filled with sadness and a hint of regret, Spencer noted. Practically rolling her eyes, JJ didn't bother listening to the team talking about Mendoza.

“JJ, Reid, check out the latest crime scene. Tara, Luke, go to the M.E.’s office,” Emily ordered.

JJ nodded her head towards Spencer, who nodded back. He noticed she masked her pain behind her eyes with a smile when she did. Maybe they’ll talk about it later.

----------------------

JJ and Spencer had just investigated the unsub’s latest victim’s house before concluding that they needed more evidence from eyewitnesses for information on his behavior. After asking a few people, the two drove their way back to the field office.

JJ was focused on the road in front of her and Spencer examined her body language. His friend was gripping the steering wheel so tight that her knuckles had turned white. She bit the inside of her cheek, and her eyes narrowed while her brows furrowed.

“JJ,” Spencer broke the silence.

She turned her head to glance at him, “What?”

“Your grip on the steering wheel is tighter than normal and the tone of your voice sounded controlled when you answered me, like you were holding back on something.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Does this have to do with Emily and Mendoza?”

JJ rolled her eyes, still focused on the road. “If Emily’s with him, then good for her.”

“What about when Garcia brought him up when we were on the jet?”

The blonde agent had enough. She took a turn to the nearest vacant spot and parked the SUV near the curb. She turned the engine off and faced the younger man. JJ quickly clasped her hands together, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath.

“Stop it, j- just stop. Please just… stop talking about Andrew, ok? I don’t want to talk about his relationship with Emily. I have to keep telling myself she’s happy with him and I have a life of my own now. So, I am begging you to stop,” JJ vented out to him. She felt tears pricking at her eyes towards the end of her rant.

“I was worried about you, JJ. I don’t like seeing my best friend hurt like this,” Spencer frowned as his eyes softened.

JJ shook her head to stop her tears from falling, but felt one single tear trail down. She bit her bottom lip, so she would not start sobbing.

“I- look, I’m sorry for snapping at you, Spence,” JJ sincerely apologized, rubbing her fingers in an attempt to soothe her worries. She knew he meant well and that he hates seeing her in pain, especially if it’s over the woman she loves. “It’s just that-”

JJ exhaled out another deep breath to compose herself. “There were flowers Andrew sent Emily, and I had to bring them over to her desk before she came in her office.”

The delivery man had arrived at the FBI building, holding a bouquet of flowers. He looked around to see if there was anyone expecting them. He saw a blonde woman pass by and quickly caught her attention.

“Excuse me. Are you Emily Prentiss?” He read his clipboard to check the name.

“Oh, no. I’m sorry, I’m not her,” JJ shook her head and smiled.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he frowned. “I got flowers for her from someone named Andrew Mendoza,” he gestured to the bouquet.

JJ froze for a second and she heard her heart shatter before responding with a polite smile, the one she used in her past liaison days. “I can leave them in her office, if that’s ok.”

“Thank you. Can you sign this for her?”

“Of course.”

After signing the clipboard and thanking the delivery man for Emily’s flowers, JJ took them and walked up to the brunette’s office. She held the flowers in her hands and frowned deeply. 'Things must be getting serious, then?' JJ wished she was the one bringing her flowers and not… him. She set the bouquet down on Emily's desk before leaving her office.

“What am I going to do?” JJ rested her forehead on the steering wheel, still gripping it. “Things seem to be going well with him and I don't think I'll ever make her that happy, not the way Andrew does. I really lost my chance with her 12 years ago,” she sighed in defeat.

“13 years, 1 day, 17 hours, 34 minutes, and 6 seconds, to be exact,” Spencer corrected her.

“Was I really that obvious?” JJ chuckled.

The doctor shrugged, “I’ve noticed you subconsciously having similar habits to Emily, like playing with your fingers and biting your lip when you’re nervous, or even dressing up similarly to her. You stare at her whenever she's not looking, for approximately 4.78 seconds. Your body seems less tense when you hear her voice, almost as if that’s the only thing that calms you down. Your pupils dilate and your cheeks turn red every time she gives you a compliment and-”

JJ cut him off with a laugh, "Ok, I think I get it."

"Oh," he quickly shut his mouth, not realizing he was rambling again.

“Spence?”

He looked at her.

“Thank you. For keeping this secret between us,” JJ said.

“It’s no problem. You are my best friend,” Spencer gave a small awkward nod.

JJ gratefully smiled at him and patted his shoulder before turning the engine on again to drive back to the field office.

----------------------

“Coffee?” JJ announced her and Spencer’s presence, holding cups for Luke and Tara. They gathered evidence that the unsub was dealing with alternate realities, and found themselves getting a little closer to finding him and what his motives are.

“Look, guys, we are banging our heads against a wall here,” Tara said. “I mean, Denver is littered with colleges, and we’ve already worked our way through most of the academics and scientists.”

“Well, you know what? We just need to take a step back and look at things differently,” JJ said. “The Mandela effect is a unique psychological construct, right? I mean, there’s got to be a good reason why he latched onto it in particular.”

“Well, creation of dissociative realities can often be a crutch for people who’ve suffered extreme trauma,” Spencer started with a fact that may be a clue to the unsub’s motive.

After a beat, Tara nodded and considered his statement, “Ok, let’s run with that. We’re looking for a loss triggered by an event likely caused by the unsub himself, and then this inability to accept this reality would be a defense mechanism for a mind racked with guilt.”

“So, unable to face reality, our unsub has created his own,” Luke connected.

“Still doesn’t explain why he’s killing fathers, though,” Spencer said after taking a sip of his coffee.

Luke shook his head and elaborated on the theory, “Unless it does. Say his own guilt is a major factor in a break like this. That would mean that he's picking out dads out of some kind of self-loathing.”

“This isn’t hatred towards his own dad,” JJ realized. “These men are surrogates for him. He’s angry at himself. Our unsub’s the father here.”

JJ recalled her colleagues’ words. She thought about the idea of parallel universes in that moment. Was she relating to the unsub? Had she subconsciously made an alternate reality where she and Emily were together because of her own guilt? It wasn’t the appropriate time to dwell on that thought, then again, when has she ever found the right time?

----------------------

The team had just finished solving the case, and were heading back to the hotel they were staying at. It was almost midnight and most of them were already in their hotel rooms. Emily had come back from visiting Mendoza and his daughter, Keely. JJ was in the hallway grabbing a small pack of Cheetos from a vending machine near her room.

Emily shook her head and smirked, Some things never change.

JJ was walking back to her room and smiled when she saw Emily, waving a hand at her. The younger woman decided it was the perfect time to talk to her since she wasn’t with Andrew.

She jogged up to the unit chief, “Hey.”

“Hey.”

“Uh, listen. I know it’s late right now, but… do you maybe wanna hang out for a bit? Just you and me,” the blonde quietly offered, placing her free hand into her pocket.

Emily nodded, “I’d like that.”

JJ gave a soft nervous chuckle before the two women walked to the younger agent’s room. JJ opened the door and held it open for Emily to step inside.

She lightly scratched her head and pointed at a plastic bag on the table near the TV, “Um… the team went out for dinner and I might’ve saved you some food, since you weren’t there.”

“Heh, thanks,” Emily said, acknowledging JJ’s considerate action and sitting on her bed..

The younger woman sat next to her. It was an openly awkward silence between the two agents, which was rare because they usually found ways to entertain one another. After a little while, JJ broke the silence.

“So, parallel universes, huh?”

“Yep,” Emily chuckled.

“Do you believe in all that?”

“Hmm?”

JJ grew quiet, “That there are multiple universes that have several possibilities we don’t really think about often?”

The unit chief looked at her hands for a moment before responding, “Sometimes, yeah. Do you?”

JJ slowly nodded in agreement, “Sometimes.” She was wringing her hands, something she did when she was nervous and didn’t know how to put things into words. “You know when my mom came to town, she told me about imagined futures and projecting yourself in them. Like a movie about how your life would play out, if you had things your way and it got me thinking.”

“About?”

She contemplated on her next words and squinted her eyes at the floor, recalling a memory a little while back. “Emily, do you remember when you said something about twin flames at Krystall and Dave’s wedding? That sometimes, it takes a parallel universe for them to be together again?”

“Yeah. I’m surprised you even remembered that,” Emily said.

JJ silently nodded and gently took Emily’s hand in hers, rubbing small circles with her thumb. The unit chief looked down at their hands and furrowed her brows in confusion.

JJ slowly licked her lips before making eye contact with her. It’s now or never. “Do you think maybe in another lifetime… you’d ever give us a shot? You know… together?”

Emily’s eyes widened, registering what she just heard, “JJ-“

“No, you’re right. I’m sorry I told you this, Emily,” JJ regretted and tried to stand up, but was stopped by a hand gently pulling her wrist.

“No, it’s not that. It’s-“ Emily gestured for her to sit down. “I just didn’t know you felt that way about me."

JJ shook her head, “I’m sorry. I- I didn’t know how to tell you this and I know it’s already too late.” She couldn’t stop the tears that were falling and she felt soft hands cup her face to wipe them away.

“Hey, hey. It’s ok,” the brunette soothed her nerves. “It’s ok, I got you.”

JJ leaned into Emily’s gentle caring touch. She raised her hands up to where Emily’s rested, and held onto them. “I- I talked to Spence the time I was shot and told him I was in love with you. I told him if things were different, I would have a chance with you. I sometimes think about how life would be if… we were together. I would’ve shared the boys with you, Emily. They love you and you love them. I would’ve loved being called your wife.”

JJ took a sharp intake of breath before letting out a bitter laugh and shaking her head, “You helped me through so much and came every time I needed you. You know, there were so many moments I kept wishing for something more, and it confused me because I didn’t realize how much happier I felt with you around.” She felt a salty tear trickle down her lips and sniffled, “I love you, Emily. And I’m sorry it took me years to say it out loud because I’m a coward.”

Emily listened to her and processed everything she just said. JJ really was in love with her all these years. It wasn’t just in her head. She was still silent and it made JJ want to run away in shame and guilt.

JJ’s eyes widened in fear as she rapidly blinked. She shook her head, mouth opening and closing as she tried to explain herself, “Emily, I- I-”

“Hey, breathe. Just breathe, ok, JJ?” Emily softened. She pressed their foreheads together to calm JJ’s nerves. “Just listen to my voice and look at me, ok? I’m here.”

JJ took deep breaths and listened to Emily while making eye contact with her through her eyelashes. The older woman wrapped an arm around JJ’s shoulders and pulled her close. “How about we lay down? Is that ok?” Emily suggested and JJ nodded.

The two scooted up to the pillows and Emily still held the younger woman close to her body. JJ felt herself relax in her warm and comforting embrace, eyes fluttering closed to take all of this in. Emily slowly rubbed big circles on JJ’s back and kissed her soft blonde hair.

After about two minutes, JJ lifted her head and blue eyes scanned Emily’s features. She raised her left hand to brush brown bangs away from her forehead. JJ silently asked Emily if it’s ok, and the unit chief nodded, knowing what her question was. The two always were best at silent communication with each other.

So, the blonde leaned closer and they both closed her eyes, listening to their nervous yet steady breaths. JJ closed the gap between them and their lips connected perfectly, like they were each other’s missing puzzle pieces the entire time. Emily tucked in a piece of hair behind JJ’s ear and brushed a thumb against her cheek.

Holding the back of her neck, JJ adjusted her body to straddle the brunette’s hips. Emily carefully sat up and cupped each side of her face. Both women thought the amount of passion in their kiss would make up for the time they’ve lost together. Tonight was the only time they really had the chance to be together, with no worry in the world. There was no Andrew, no Will, none of the members of the team or their troubled pasts. It was just JJ and Emily as lovers for tonight.

Emily reluctantly pulled away to rest their foreheads together, while JJ’s eyes were still closed and blindly chasing after her lips. The younger woman’s hand was still buried in dark hair as she slowly opened her eyes, licking her lips. She saw Emily’s pupils dilated from the almost heated kiss and chest heaving to regulate her breathing back to normal. Emily gave JJ a short and sweet kiss before JJ laid back down beside her.

“You know, I was kinda wishing we’d done more than just that,” Emily admitted quietly.

JJ nodded against her shoulder, “Me too. But we can’t.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry for everything,” JJ said, her head now in the crook of Emily’s neck and sighing. “I wish I’d said something before.”

Emily bit her bottom lip and looked at the ceiling, “I wish I’d said something, too.”

“Maybe in another life…”

“Yeah," Emily softly said. She didn't need to hear the rest because she thought the same thing. Her hand made its way down to connect with JJ’s, squeezing it lightly to know that everything is going to be ok.

JJ glanced down at their joined hands and raised them up to her lips to kiss the older woman’s knuckles. “You know, I remember joking around with Spence one time that it was his and Penelope’s job to get Henry into Yale. I didn’t even realize you went to Yale. I guess I really was thinking about you the entire time, huh? I think I wanted Henry to follow in your footsteps.”

Emily raised her eyebrows in amusement, “Wow.” She blushed and looked down at their hands, hiding a small grin, “You really wanted Henry to be like me?”

“In a way, yeah,” the blonde agent nodded, running her thumb over Emily’s. “Well, maybe without the goth phase in high school…”

Emily playfully shoved her and JJ laughed. She cringed at that goddamn awful photo Garcia had pulled up once and teased her about, “I’m never going to live that down, am I?”

JJ shook her head, smiling, and Emily groaned.

“To be honest, I’ve always imagined us living in Charlottesville, for some reason,” JJ stared at the ceiling, getting lost in her thoughts. “Maybe when we retire, we’d find a nice, stable home for us and the kids, you know? I think I want a place to finally settle down and not worry so much about what we deal with on a daily basis. Maybe we’d actually see our kids grow up and not miss out on that. There’s some wineries and vineyards we could go to… and this really good restaurant I could show you sometime, if we ever have a day off. Some places we could hike, you know if you’re up for it…” she winked at her.

Emily nodded, “That sounds nice. As for the hiking, that’s a definite no.”

JJ softly laughed and kissed her cheek, sighing contentedly, “What about you? What’s your alternate reality?”

Emily smiled, “Remember that story I told you about my grandfather’s home in the French Alps? I always thought that once we retire from the BAU, we’d go up there after our kids graduate high school. I kinda thought about taking his place up there after he died. You know, just to get away from things. Maybe you could ski with the kids and I’d be inside making us some tea and hot chocolate. We’d gather around a little fire and, I don’t know, make some crafty things.”

JJ nodded and lifted her head to look at her, “You still haven’t answered my question earlier. Would you have considered it?”

Emily let out a chuckle and pressed a gentle kiss on her forehead, “I wouldn’t even hesitate.”

“I love you, Emily. I want you to know that,” JJ whispered, leaning back up to kiss her again.

Emily smiled sadly as she responded with, “Always, blackbird. I will always love you, too.”

Tonight was just them, JJ and Emily, no one else. They can worry about the rest tomorrow. For now, this was their chance to be together. A thought crossed Emily’s mind as she remembered her own speech about twin flames:

Twin flames. Two souls that are always meant to be together. Sometimes it takes time, sometimes it takes a parallel universe or something. But the thing about twin flames is that nothing can keep them apart. They are a magic unto themselves, and together, they light the way for all of us.

Now looking back at it, she remembered how her eyes kept darting back to JJ’s at the wedding. The way the ghost of a frown was on JJ’s face as she squeezed Will’s hand in reassurance, or how JJ snuck a little smile at Emily when she stood in between her husband and her long-lost lover. The following events when JJ was shot, Emily remembered how her heart rate increased on the monitor once she entered the hospital room to check up on her.

Was Emily so blind to realize that JJ loved her back? She had missed all those signs JJ had displayed over the years. They could have been together, if only both of them said something sooner.

This was their time, their time alone. This universe gave them this night together. Only in another life, would they be together for certain.

[oathofoaksart]

YOUNG JUSTICE/DC OC: JO “LOVETAP” SHINODA

bio under the cut!

BASICS

Name: Josephine Shinoda 

A.K.A: Lovetap; Jo, Jojo, Jo-Hoe, Tap

Age: 29 [S3]

Gender: Cisgender Female 

Orientation: Bisexual

Occupation: Music Store Owner, Star Sapphire Corps Member 

 Race: Human 

Ethnicity: Japanese-Caucasian 

Location: Santa Monica, California 

Hometown: Hana, Maui; Hawaii

 Skin: Fairly suntanned with visible bikini tanlines, lightly freckled around the nose and cheekbone area

Hair: Naturally black with a blonde ombre gradient, gradient turns dark magenta when powered up. 

Eyes: Red-Brown [civvies], Glowing magenta sclera with white-pink irises [powered up]

Height: 5'4

Build: Well-toned, with strong arms and legs; ample curved. 

Distinctions: Inscription of the One Ring tattooed on her right shoulder blade, fond of yoga pants and loose band muscle shirts combo

 RELATIONS

Parents: Haruto and Tara Shinoda

Siblings: Jack "Daiichi" Shinoda (twin brother; deceased) 

Friends: Emi Homura (deceased), Ghia'ta, Carol "Star Sapphire" Ferris, Guy "Green Lantern" Gardner, Leiko “Inari” Ara [OC], Tora "Ice" Olafsdotter, Shayera “Hawkgirl” Hal, Hank “Hawk” Hall, Don “Dove” Hall, Charlie “Scribe” Jenson [OC] 

Partner/s: Several noncommittal relationships and one-nighters; Bryce "Red Lantern" Richards [OC] (ev.)

Misc.: Queen Aga'po, Gi "Riot/Geode" Flores [OC]

Affiliations: The Star Sapphire Corps, The Justice League  

 PERSONALITY

Personality Type: ENFJ-A [Assertive Protagonist] 

Temperament: Sanguine-Choleric 

Alignment: Neutral Good 

Relaxed | Positive | Idealistic | Sensitive | Stubborn 

 Jo is the poster girl for the coastal surfer babe; laid-back, fun-loving, and friendly. She’s an honest woman, though not scathing, which makes her a go-to for advice and well-placed encouragement. Because of her many interests, she meets and makes friends in all walks of life, often making her the social link between vastly different groups. Her passion rears its head in concern of humanitarian subjects, from LGBTQ+ issues to food crises, and will jump at the chance to lend aid. 

This is especially true as Lovetap, where she feels she has a more hands-on approach in doing good. Her personality doesn’t change in costume as it does amplify, she stays playful and lighthearted in tense situations, but her morals are steadfast. Tap is a loyal and dedicated ally to her fellow Sapphires and friends in the Justice League circle, and a personable hero to civilians she encounters. 

She’s very well-meaning, but she also tends to bite more than she can chew. This becomes a problem when she’s too headstrong to admit she needs a breather and will continue shouldering the weight until someone steps in. It also applies to her emotions, Jo is quick to lend a shoulder to cry on, but struggles to admit when something is amiss in her personal life in fear of bogging down others. Her way of coping with her problems is usually done by busying herself with projects, but sooner or later it becomes too much and she’ll spiral. 

ABILITIES AND WEAKNESSES

Powers and Abilities

Violet Energy Conduit: As part of the Star Sapphire Corps, Jo wields a Violet Power Ring. Like most power rings on the emotional spectrum, it allows Jo the ability of flight, survival in vacuums, manipulation of energy, creation of force fields, creation of light constructs at will, and tap into a xenolinguistic database. Because the Violet ring is powered by love, it also has attributes found only in the Sapphire Corps. 

Love Empathy: Love is the center of the Sapphire Corps and much of the Sapphire’s abilities tie to it. Jo can detect feelings and connections of love from which she can draw power from outside her actual power battery. She can also form connection tethers to people she feels close with, she can use these tethers to know if the other person may be in possible danger and quickly teleport to their side. Being around other Sapphires greatly increases her power as they feed off each other’s love like an echo chamber. 

Crystallization:  Special to the Star Sapphire Corps is the creation of Star Sapphire crystals, often in conjunction to their energy constructs. These crystals can also be used to encase a victim and place them in suspended animation, in some cases able to use the victim as an extra power source by influencing them with love. Jo personally doesn't like to take it up to this point, as she finds it too intrusive. 

Violet Energy Constructs: Jo is able to conjure light constructs at will, her ring being able to create any object. Jo is fond of using mecha-like weapons, classic horror and kaiju characters, and figures from her favorite Kurasawa movies.  

Healing Capabilities: Jo’s ring not only lets her heal at an accelerated rate, but also heal injuries of, or even revive, others provided she has a strong enough connection to share the life energy for such a feat. 

Avarice Immunity: Because Jo’s love is of the selfless sort, Jo is immune to the attacks of an Orange Lantern as long as her love stays that way. 

 Limitations and Weaknesses:

Emotional Instability: The Sapphire ring is a double-edged sword in that while it's formidable in raw power, it can easily turn against Jo with an overload of emotion. If she’s not careful, the ring can influence her day-to-day life from being overly jealous and protective of those she cares for, to being too sensitive of her own feelings. In a worst case scenario, the ring can completely overcome Jo’s mind and force her into a frenzy.

Ring Dependency: Without her ring, Jo reverts to an average human woman, so she is entirely dependent on her ring for protection and offence.  It’s necessary for her to have her ring on at all times or at least on her person should the need arise. 

 HISTORY

Born second of fraternal twins, Josephine Shinoda lived an idyllic lifestyle with her parents and brother in her hometown of Hana, in Maui, Hawaii. Jo and her brother Jack were an especially close pair of siblings, sharing interests from surfing with their father to classic pop culture. Jo was the much more extroverted sibling and had no trouble making friends where she went, whereas Jack had difficulty asserting himself socially; Jo often made strides to make her friends friends of Jack’s. This continued all through their young school life, even as Jack’s social anxiety gave way to depression. Jo and her parents were supportive of him throughout, and continued to be so when the twins finally separated when college came around. 

Jo chose to study in Los Angeles whereas Jack left for Metropolis. Admittedly the distance worried Jo for a while, but college proved to be an overall good experience for Jack, especially once after the introduction of his later girlfriend, Emi. 

Jo spent her college years partying and submercing herself into the music scene, eventually sparking the idea of opening a music store after college. Jack jumped at the idea with Emi right behind, she also being involved in music via playing guitar for an alternative band. Jo and Emi became solid friends in their own right, meeting and sharing even more when Jo would visit on the occasion. 

Not long after college, Jo learned Jack had proposed to Emi and was elated by the news. The three went into making wedding plans, but things were cut short two months into the engagement. Jack and Emi were caught in a fatal car crash, leaving Jo inconsolable. After their respective funerals and some time reflecting, Jo followed through with opening a music shop in their honor, “JJ’s Music and Records.” 

Jo operated in LA for a handful of years before deciding to expand out of her comfort zone and opening another store somewhere else. With an intern in tow, they settled on Bludhaven, where Jo spent another few years. Despite how well her business was doing and that her life was going in a good direction, Jo hadn’t been able to shake off the loss of her two closest friends. She was restless and tried to bury her feelings by distracting herself with anything she could involve herself in, as she didn’t want to set this worry on anyone, especially her parents. Jo was steadily wrapping herself into a depression and refused to admit it. She returned to LA in hopes that the move and reconnecting with old friends would clear her mind. 

With no such luck, Jo proceeded to shell within herself. Her days dulled and she became stuck in routine, spending most of her time in the shop and locking herself at home. While in a particular bad spell, Jo decided to go to the beach to surf and Jo was caught in a minor car crash herself. She wasn’t injured, but the experience was jarring and Jo’s previous experience with car accidents sent her into an emotional break. 

At the same time, Ghia’ta, niece of Queen Aga’po of the Star Sapphires, arrived on Earth with an agenda. The Star Sapphires had experienced a bit of a moral shift, currently spearheaded by Ghia’ta, after she’d met a human by the name Carol Ferris. Carol had been inducted into the Star Sapphires in order to gain the upper hand on the Green Lantern, Hal Jordan, while he found himself on the Sapphire’s homeplanet of Zamarron. But Carol had resisted the Sapphires’ urging and instead gave Ghia’ta an alternate view of what love was, selfless and kind. Moved by Carol’s insight, Ghia’ta began to try to teach the other Sapphires this new view. She was met by rebuttal and while she continued to fight for reform, she knew doing so alone wasn’t going to get her far. 

She’d come to Earth in search for a new Sapphire that could better follow Ghia’ta’s new outlook, as Carol chose not to join the Corps and Ghia’ta had gotten word of Earth’s Lanterns being of a special crop. What she came across was Jo, stranded and crying on the side of the road. Initially Ghia’ta approached her to see if she could be of any help, but to her surprise, her ring detected Jo’s broken heart. Jo’s loss of her brother and friend left a deep hole in her heart and Ghia’ta discovered that this was caused by the love stripped away from her. Sapphires, Ghia’ta included, believed true love to be inherently romantic, but while looking into Jo’s heart she found her love for her brother and friend to be just as true as any. Overjoyed at this realization, she decided to choose Jo as her new champion. 

Jo was thrown for a loop. First by the appearance of this stranger who showed herself to be an alien who’d somehow read into why she felt the way she did, then by her request to join her galactic love brigade. Still Ghia’ta’s ring called out to her and the more she explained the situation of the Sapphires, the more Jo felt a sense of duty. Jo had never been the kind to turn down an opportunity to help, even if the road sounded steep, and so she accepted. 

Jo became the newest member of the Star Sapphire Corps. Her induction was met with heavy scrutiny by the Zamarrons, the leaders of the Sapphire Corps, as she didn’t fit the perimeters in which they chose their new members. In a slight twist, Queen Aga’po allowed Jo to join as a “experiment” partially to show Ghia’ta her claims were being taken seriously and that Aga’po herself was becoming open to her niece’s words. 

Jo still isn’t completely sure what she’s gotten herself into, but plans to make the most with what she was given. And she hopes, if there is an afterlife, that Jack and Emi could be at peace with what they helped aspire. 

 NOTES

For no reason other than personal preference, Lovetap is set on using a surfboard construct as her mode of flight, even during battle. 

Jo is very athletic and a bit of a gym rat, enjoying activities from various sports to yoga. She is also an avid reader and lover of pop culture, reflecting in JJ’s as it doubles as a bookstore as well. She found a fellow Justice League ally with a pop culture store named Charlie Jenson and the two quickly made their store affiliates. 

Jo’s birthday falls on Valentine’s Day and she finds the irony of it funny 

Jo had a hardcore, but thankfully, short-lived, crush on Guy Gardner. It’s a secret she’ll take to the grave. 

Jo learned how to play the acoustic guitar because of Emi and plays outside her LA store on nice days, something she eventually teaches her young friend and eventual mentee, Gi Flores. 

Her father was a gourmet chef and much of what he knew he taught his children, Jo is a wicked cook, but is often too lazy to get creative with her dishes. 

[ravensmind]

Happy RobRae week 2021! Here's my day 1 prompt fic. There will be an extended smuttier version coming soon. Might only do this prompt this year just due to things I have going on, but I'm still writing! Hope you enjoy this 😃.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13863436/1/Finals-and-a-First

~RavensMind~

RobRae week 2021 

Day 1: Gotham Academy AU

Finals and a First

Finals week. Two simple words that had the power to make anyone quake with anxiety and while he may do a good job of hiding it, Dick Grayson was no exception. Luckily for him, he had a solid group of friends who had each other’s backs. They mostly studied as a group when they were free, unless their class schedule or extracurricular activity demanded they improvise. Gotham Academy was not known for caring about its students' friendships or whether they had free time to study together or not. Dick was on the football team and they did not have practice that day, so he was free, but Victor, Kori, Garfield, and Tara were all at meets or practices or matches or just in class, only Rachel was able to study with him, and that presented a challenge. Dick was enamored with Rachel, infatuated with Rachel, could not stop thinking about Rachel, and she had no idea because he just could. Not. Tell. Her. 

Even though Rachel Roth, the quiet, reserved, sarcastic, smart, violet-haired girl was sitting only inches away from him at the same table in the library, he could not look at her, as he had some paranoid feeling that she knew exactly how he felt when he looked at her. Normally, he would play off of his other friends, but now they were alone. He hid in his textbook, pretending to be very interested in some words located near the spine of the book in some rose colored block of text. Out of frustration with his own inner turmoil, he picked up the noble they’d been assigned to read and chucked it into a nearby bookcase.

“Are you okay?” Rachel asked in a frustrated tone.

“Yeah, I’m fine, why?” Dick returned.

"You’re just not usually this quiet, is all,” she replied.

“Guess I’m just nervous,” he said.

“About our finals?” 

“Yeah,” he said, thanking the universe for that excuse.

“I didn’t think you got nervous over stuff like this, at least I don’t think I’ve seen it. Wait ‘till this gets out, the chill, cool captain of the football team is freaking over his final,” she teased.

“But you wouldn’t tell anyone, right?”

“No. Lucky you, I don’t think anyone would believe me.”

“That the only reason you wouldn’t say anything?”

“No, because I don’t know that I believe you either,” she replied, toying with a strand of her hair with one of her slim, almost pale fingers.

Dick chanced a look at her and was surprised to see a playful smirk on her face and a strange look in her violet eyes that he was not sure he had seen before. He tensed a little when he realized he had slipped up and looked at her. Did she know? Was he screwed? The last thing he wanted was to make her uncomfortable and get on her bad side. She had enough trouble dealing with the gossip and judgmental teachers for her goth vibe and overall lack of shits to give attitude.

At one point, he heard Rachel had been summoned to the dean’s office for violating the dress code by wearing black knee highs over fishnets and foregoing the standard blue skirt for a black one. Her response was that technically she was in compliance, as there was no rule about a specific color skirt, or that she could not wear anything in addition to the socks on her legs, and she was a model student. Aside from snapping at a teacher or two, she was rarely in trouble, and he knew she had good grades. She still kept that style, even though more teachers voiced their disapproval, but they ultimately could not do anything without changing the dress code and it was not worth it. After he heard about what happened, Dick helped her out by changing the color tie and slacks he wore from blue to black, as his popularity would make her style choice far less controversial. He had mostly done it to help her, but he also liked being seen as more of a rebel. He stuck up for her when she was being picked on and she was always quick to shut down anyone who was bad-mouthing him.They had grown a bit closer as a result, though neither really acknowledged it to the other. 

He swallowed and considered what his options would be if she dug deeper. He hoped that he could talk his way out of whatever accusation she was about to make. He shifted in his chair and cleared his throat.

“What makes you say that?” he asked.

“Hmm. Well, you’ve never really stressed about tests before. When Gar complains, you calm him down and put together a plan to study, so I’m pretty sure you’re more level-headed,” she replied.

“Doesn’t mean I’m not nervous.”

“No, but I think it’s less likely that it’s about the exams. Now that I think about it… you kind of acted like this last time we hung out. Maybe it’s about one of us,” she thought aloud.

“Like I said, I’m nervous about finals. It’s, uhh, just been a lot for me this time. It’s our last year and I don’t want Bruce to be harder on me if I don’t measure up,” he said, injecting a little truth, desperately hoping it would help sell his lie.

“I suppose that’s fair, but I still don’t think it’s that.”

“Why’s it matter? It’s not like I’m hiding anything that would hurt people. I’m just stressed!”

“You’re hiding plenty, but that’s not the point. It matters,” she hesitated before continuing, “because I don’t like seeing you stressed. It’s like I can feel it and I want to help you. Something’s clearly eating at you and I hate seeing you try and bury it like it’s not there.”

He sighed and looked  down at his book. He stared down at the page as he felt the swelling of emotions that rose from his heart. He wanted to spill everything, but knew that it would not be fair to her, to dump everything at once and give her a massive choice to make about them. He cared about her and she clearly cared about him, so he thought he might be able to at least give her a hint or two. She was dealing with more than enough, she didn’t need his problems too.

“Okay...don’t laugh. It’s about a girl,” he said.

Rachel perked up and tilted her head. Dick swore her eyes lit up, but that may have just been a trick of the light as someone passed by the window near them, book in hand. 

“I’m not going to laugh! What’s making you so nervous? I seriously doubt you’d ever need to be stressing over a girl, plenty throw themselves at you, though I guess that could be tough too.”

“She’s different. I like her, but she’s never really said if she likes me or not. I hang out with her quite a bit and we have fun, or I think we do. I'm just not sure if I want to take a chance and mess up a good thing.”

“You’re being ridiculous.. Clearly she likes you enough to spend time with you, you should have had some kinda obvious sign by now. Some girls tease you or act a certain way around you, others might be more blunt, but you have to know at this point. Though, it would help if you said who she is,” she teased knowingly.

“Hah, yeah, it is a little silly,” he chuckled, “You wouldn’t tell her though?”

“Yeah, that’s why I’m interested, I need to get ready for the big reveal, lots of pyro and speakers to set up,” she replied sarcastically, rolling her eyes, “No, of course not, idiot. You know you can trust me. Why the secrecy, though? Is it... Kori?”

She leaned forward with interest, almost teetering on the edge of her seat.

“No, uh, but you’re kinda close,” he said, anxiously shifting in his chair.

He watched as she went quiet and crossed her legs in her chair, sitting up a bit straighter as she considered the possible remaining options. He hoped she had thought of herself first.

“I admit, I could see why you’d like Tara, she’s pretty easy to talk to and knows what she likes, which isn’t common,” she said, tracing her bottom lip with her finger, “I think she can be a little insecure though, so you may want to keep that in mind.”

He wondered to himself if she was toying with him.

“It’s uhh, it’s not Tara, either,” he admitted, his cheeks turning red.

Rachel’s cheeks also reddened as her mouth formed a coy smile, and she went quiet. Her fingers played with the edge of a page in her textbook as she looked away from Dick toward the door before snapping back so her eyes met his.

“Oh. So, I think if you like her, you really should say something. I’m not sure if I know *exactly* how she feels, but I’d want to hear you say how much you like me. I’d like to know how I made you feel… if I was her,” she teased.

“Are you sure? I uhh, I’d hate if I came on to her too strongly, she’d shut me down and it would mess with the friendship she and I had,” he asked, undoing his tie and opening his school blazer a little. He was feeling very warm all of a sudden.

“I don’t think she would let that happen, Dick,” she replied, leaning closer to him, “You should probably tell me who she is...so I have a better idea.”

He took a deep breath and smiled at her, letting the moment last, enjoying the hopeful, expectant look on her face.

“Her name is Rachel,” he said, edging closer to her.

Dick felt his heart pounding in his chest and he swore his face was burning as they both got closer to each other, until his lips were inches from Rachel’s. Neither looked around to see who else in the library might be watching, and the idea that anyone else even existed was as distant as another planet. Her eyes closed as she pressed her lips to his and he eagerly kissed her back, hardly believing this was happening. Their heated kiss was interrupted by the sound of the librarian reprimanding a classmate of theirs at another table on the other side of a bookcase. Rachel smiled at him, biting her lip while she studied his face for a moment.

“That. Is what you get when you tell the truth,” she said.

[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Thought About Loki (Season One)

(Sorry this is later than it should have been. I may or may not be experiencing burnout from reviewing every episode of the gayest show Disney has ever produced)

Salutations, random people on the internet. I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.

Do you want to know what's fun about the Marvel Cinematic Universe? It is now officially at the point where the writers can do whatever the hell they want.

A TV series about two Avengers getting stuck in a series of sitcoms as one of them explores their personal grief? Sure.

Another series as a guy with metal bird wings fights the inner racism of his nation to take the mantel of representing the idea of what that nation should be? Why not?

A forgettable movie about a superspy and her much more mildly entertaining pretend family working together to kill the Godfather? F**king go for it (Let that be a taste for my Black Widow review in October)!

There is no limit to what you can get with these movies and shows anymore, and I personally consider that a good thing. It allows this franchise to lean further into creative insanity, thus embracing its comic roots in the process. Take Loki, for example. It is a series about an alternate version of one of Marvel's best villains bouncing around the timeline with Owen Wilson to prevent the end of the universe. It sounds like just the right amount of wackiness that it should be too good to fail.

But that's today's question: Did it fail? To find out my own answer to that, we're gonna have to dive deep into spoilers. So be wary as you continue reading.

With that said, let's review, shall we?

WHAT I LIKED

Loki Himself: Let's get this out of the way: This isn't the same Loki we've seen grow within five movies. The Loki in this series, while similar in many ways, is still his very own character. He goes through his own redemption and developments that fleshes out Loki, all through ways that, if I'm being honest with you, is done much better in six-hour-long episodes than in past films. Loki's story was already entertaining, but he didn't really grow that much aside from being this chaotic neutral character instead of this wickedly evil supervillain. Through his series, we get to see a gradual change in his personality, witnessing him understand his true nature and "glorious purpose," to the point where he's already this completely different person after one season. Large in part because of the position he's forced into.

Some fans might say that the series is less about Loki and more about the TVA. And while I can unquestionably see their point, I still believe that the TVA is the perfect way for Loki to grow. He's a character all about causing chaos and controlling others, so forcing him to work for an organization that takes that away allows Loki time to really do some introspection. Because if his tricks don't work, and his deceptions can't fool others, then who is he? Well, through this series, we see who he truly is: A character who is alone and is intended to be nothing more than a villain whose only truly selfless act got him killed in the end. Even if he wants to better himself, he can't because that "goes against the sacred timeline." Loki is a person who is destined to fail, and he gets to see it all with his own eyes by looking at what his life was meant to be and by observing what it could have been. It's all tragic and yet another example of these shows proving how they allow underdeveloped characters in the MCU a better chance to shine. Because if Loki can give even more depth to a character who's already compelling as is, then that is a feat worth admiration.

The Score: Let's give our gratitude toward Natalie Holt, who f**king killed it with this series score. Every piece she made is nothing short of glorious. Sylvie's and the TVA's themes particularly stand out, as they perfectly capture who/what they're representing. Such as how Sylvie's is big and boisterous where the TVA's sound eerie and almost unnatural. Holt also finds genius ways to implement other scores into the series, from using familiar tracks from the Thor movies to even rescoring "Ride of the Valkyries" in a way that makes a scene even more epic than it already could have been. The MCU isn't best known for its musical scores, partly because they aim to be suitable rather than memorable. But every now and again, something as spectacular as the Loki soundtrack sprinkles through the cracks of mediocrity. Making fans all the more grateful because of it.

There’s a lot of Talking: To some, this will be considered a complaint. Most fans of the MCU come for the action, comedy, and insanely lovable characters. Not so much for the dialogue and exposition. That being said, I consider all of the talking to be one of Loki's best features. All the background information about the TVA added with the character's backstories fascinates me, making me enthusiastic about learning more. Not everyone else will be as interested in lore and world-building as others, but just because something doesn't grab you, in particular, doesn't mean it isn't appealing at all. Case in point: There's a reason why the Five Nights at Freddy's franchise has lasted as long as it has, and it's not entirely because of how "scary" it is.

There's also the fact that most of the dialogue in Loki is highly engaging. I'll admit, some scenes do drag a bit. However, every line is delivered so well that I'm more likely to hang on to every word when characters simply have honest conversations with each other. And if I can be entertained by Loki talking with Morbius about jetskis, then I know a show is doing at least something right.

It’s Funny: This shouldn't be a surprise. The MCU is well-known for its quippy humor in the direct acknowledgment that it doesn't take itself too seriously. With that said, it is clear which movies and shows are intended to be taken seriously, while others are meant to be comedies. Loki tries to be a bit of both. There are some heavy scenes that impact the characters, and probably even some fans, due to how well-acted and professionally written they can be. However, this is also a series about a Norse god traveling through time to deal with alternate versions of himself, with one of them being an alligator. I'd personally consider it a crime against storytelling to not make it funny. Thankfully, the writers aren't idiots and know to make the series fun with a few flawlessly timed and delivered jokes that never really take away from the few good grim moments that actually work.

It Kept Me Surprised: About everything I appreciate about Loki, the fact that I could never really tell what direction it was going is what I consider its absolute best feature. Every time I think I knew what was going to happen, there was always this one big twist that heavily subverted any and every one of my expectations. Such as how each time I thought I knew who the big bad was in this series, it turns out that there was an even worse threat built up in the background. The best part is that these twists aren't meant for shock value. It's always supposed to drive the story forward, and on a rewatch, you can always tell how the seeds have been planted for making each surprise work. It's good that it kept fans guessing, as being predictable and expected would probably be the worst path to take when making a series about Loki, a character who's all about trickery and deception. So bonus points for being in line with the character.

The TVA: You can complain all you want about how the show is more about the TVA than it is Loki, but you can't deny how the organization in question is a solid addition to the MCU. Initially, it was entertaining to see Loki of all characters be taken aback by how the whole process works. And it was worth a chuckle seeing Infinity Stones, the most powerful objects in the universe, get treated as paperweights. However, as the season continues and we learn about the TVA, the writers show that their intention is to try and write a message about freedom vs. control. We've seen this before in movies like Captain America: The Winter Soldier or Captain America: Civil War, but with those films, it always felt like the writers were leaning more towards one answer instead of making it obscure over which decision is correct. This is why I enjoy the fact that Loki went on saying that there really is no right answer for this scenario. If the TVA doesn't prune variants, it could result in utter chaos and destruction that no one from any timeline can prepare themselves for. But when they do prune variants along with their timelines, it takes away all free will, forcing people to be someone they probably don't even want to be. It's a situation where there really is no middle ground. Even if you bring up how people could erase timelines more destructive than others, that still takes away free will on top of how there's no unbiased way of deciding which timelines are better or worse. And the series found a brilliant way to explain this moral: The season starts by showing how the TVA is necessary, to later point out how there are flaws and evil secrets within it, and ends things with the revelation that there are consequences without the TVA keeping the timeline in check. It's an epic showcase of fantastic ideas met with exquisite execution that I can't help but give my seal of approval to.

Miss Minutes: Not much to say. This was just a cute character, and I love that Tara Strong, one of the most popular voice actors, basically plays a role in the MCU now.

Justifying Avengers: Endgame: Smartest. Decision. This series. Made. Bar none.

Because when you establish that the main plot is about a character getting arrested for f**king over the timeline, you're immediately going to get people questioning, "Why do the Avengers get off scot-free?" So by quickly explaining how their time-traveling antics were supposed to happen, it negates every one of those complaints...or most of them. There are probably still a-holes who are poking holes in that logic, but they're not the ones writing this review, so f**k them.

Mobius: I didn't really expect Owen Wilson to do that good of a job in Loki. Primarily due to how the Cars franchise discredits him as a professional actor for...forever. With that said, Owen Wilson's Mobius might just be one of the most entertaining characters in the series. Yes, even more so than Loki himself. Mobius acts as the perfect straight man to Loki's antics, what with being so familiar with the supposed god of mischief through past variations of him. Because of that, it's always a blast seeing these two bounce off one another through Loki trying to trick a Loki expert, and said expert even deceiving Loki at times. Also, on his own, Mobius is still pretty fun. He has this sort of witty energy that's often present in Phil Coulson (Love that character too, BTW), but thanks to Owen Wilson's quirks in his acting, there's a lot more energy to Mobius than one would find in Coulson. As well as a tad bit of tragedy because of Mobius being a variant and having no clue what his life used to be. It's a lot to unpack and is impressively written, added to how it's Owen Wilson who helps make the character work as well as he did. Cars may not have done much for his career, but Loki sure as hell showed his strengths.

Ravonna Renslayer: Probably the least entertaining character, but definitely one of the most intriguing. At least to me.

Ravonna is a character who is so steadfast in her believes that she refuses to accept that she may be wrong. Without the proper writing, someone like Ravonna could tick off (ha) certain people. Personally, I believe that Ravonna is written well enough where even though I disagree with her belief, I can understand where she's coming from. She's done so much for the TVA, bringing an end to so many variants and timelines that she can't accept that it was all for nothing. In short, Ravonna represents the control side of the freedom vs. control theme that the writers are pushing. Her presence is necessary while still being an appealing character instead of a plot device. Again, at least to me.

Hunter B-15: I have no strong feelings one way or another towards B-15's personality, but I will admit that I love the expectation-subversion done with her. She has this air of someone who's like, "I'm this by-the-books badass cop, and I will only warm up to this cocky rookie after several instances of them proving themselves." That's...technically not B-15. She's the first to see Loki isn't that bad, but only because B-15 is the first in the main cast to learn the hidden vile present in the TVA. It makes her change in point of view more believable than how writers usually work a character like hers, on top of adding a new type of engaging motivation for why she fights. I may not particularly enjoy her personality, but I do love her contributions.

Loki Watching What His Life Could Have Been: This was a brilliant decision by the writers. It's basically having Loki speedrun his own character development through witnessing what he could have gone through and seeing the person he's meant to be, providing a decent explanation for why he decides to work for the TVA. And on the plus side, Tom Hiddleston did a fantastic job at portraying the right emotions the character would have through a moment like this. Such as grief, tearful mirth, and borderline shock and horror. It's a scene that no other character could go through, as no one but Loki needed a wake-up call for who he truly is. This series might heavily focus on the TVA, but scenes like this prove just who's the star of the show.

Loki Causing Mischief in Pompeii: I just really love this scene. It's so chaotic and hilarious, all heavily carried by the fact that you can tell that Tom Hiddleston is having the time of his damn life being this character. What more can I say about it.

Sylvie: The first of many surprises this season offered, and boy was she a great one.

Despite being an alternate version of Loki, I do appreciate that Sylvie's her own character and not just "Loki, but with boobs." She still has the charm and charisma, but she also comes across as more hardened and intelligent when compared to the mischievous prick we've grown to love. A large part of that is due to her backstory, which might just be the most tragic one these movies and shows have ever made. Sylvie got taken away when she was a little girl, losing everything she knew and loved, and it was all for something that the people who arrested her don't even remember. How sad is that? The fact that her life got permanently screwed over, leaving zero impact on the people responsible for it. As badass as it is to hear her say she grew up at the ends of a thousand worlds (that's an album title if I ever heard one), it really is depressing to know what she went through. It also makes her the perfect candidate to represent the freedom side of the freedom vs. control argument. Because she's absolutely going to want to fight to put an end to the people who decide how the lives of trillions should be. Those same people took everything from Sylvie, and if I were in her position, I'd probably do the same thing. Of course, we all know the consequences that come from this, and people might criticize Sylvie the same way they complain about Thor and Star Lord for screwing over the universe in Avengers: Infinity War. But here's the thing: Sylvie's goals are driven by vengeance, which can blind people from any other alternatives. Meaning her killing He Who Remains is less of a story flaw and more of a character flaw. It may be a bad decision, but that's for Season Two Sylvie to figure out. For now, I'll just appreciate the well-written and highly compelling character we got this season and eagerly wait as we see what happens next with her.

The Oneshot in Episode Three: Not as epic as the hallway scene in Daredevil, but I do find it impressive that it tries to combine real effects, fighting, and CGI in a way where it's all convincing enough.

Lady Sif Kicking Loki in the D**k: This is a scene that makes me realize why I love this series. At first, I laugh at Loki being stuck in a time loop where Lady Sif kicks him in the d**k over and over again. But a few scenes later, this setup actually works as a character moment that explains why Loki does the things he does.

This series crafted phenomenal character development through Loki getting kicked in the d**k by the most underrated badass of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. It's a perfect balance of comedy and drama that not every story can nail, yet Loki seemed like it did with very little effort.

Classic Loki: This variant shows the true tragedy of being Loki. The only way to survive is to live in isolation, far away from everything and everyone he loves, only to end up having his one good deed result in his death anyways. Classic Loki is definitive proof that no matter what face they have, Lokis never gets happy endings. They're destined to lose, but at least this version knows that if you're going out, you're going out big. And at least he got to go out with a mischievous laugh.

(Plus, the fact that he's wearing Loki's first costume from the comics is a pretty cute callback).

Alligator Loki: Alligator Loki is surprisingly adorable, and if you know me, you know that I can't resist cute s**t. It's not in my nature.

Loki on Loki Violence: If you thought Loki going ham in Pompeii was chaotic, that was nothing to this scene. Because watching these Lokis backstab one another, to full-on murdering each other, is a moment that is best described as pure, unadulterated chaos. And I. Loved. Every. Second of it.

The Opening Logo for the Season Finale: I'm still not that big of a fan of the opening fanfare playing for each episode, but I will admit that it was a cool feature to play vocal clips of famous quotes when the corresponding character appears. It's a great way of showing the chaos of how the "sacred timeline" works without having it to be explained further.

The Citadel: I adore the set design of the Citadel. So much history and backstory shine through the state of every room the characters walk into. You get a perfect picture of what exactly happened, but seeing how ninety percent of the place is in shambles, it's pretty evident that not everything turned out peachy keen. And as a personal note, my favorite aspect of the Citadel is the yellow cracks in the walls. It looks as though reality itself is cracking apart, which is pretty fitting when considering where the Citadel actually is.

He Who Remains: This man. I. Love. This man.

I love this man for two reasons.

A. He's a ton of fun. Credit to that goes to the performance delivered by Jonathon Majors. Not only is it apparent that Majors is having a blast, but he does a great job at conveying how He Who Remains is a strategic individual but is still very much off his rocker. These villains are always my favorite due to how much of a blast it is seeing someone with high intelligence just embracing their own insanity. If you ask me, personalities are always essential for villains. Because even when they have the generic plot to rule everything around them, you're at least going to remember who they are for how entertaining they were. Thankfully He Who Remains has that entertainment value, as it makes me really excited for his eventual return, whether it'd be strictly through Loki Season Two or perhaps future movies.

And B. He Who Remains is a fantastic foil for Loki. He Who Remains is everything Loki wishes he could have been, causing so much death, destruction, and chaos to the multiverse. The important factor is that he does it all through order and control. The one thing Loki despises, and He Who Remains uses it to his advantage. I feel like that's what makes him the perfect antagonist to Loki, thanks to him winning the game by not playing it. I would love it if He Who Remains makes further appearances in future movies and shows, especially given how he's hinted to be Kane the Conqueror, but if he's only the main antagonist in Loki, I'm still all for it. He was a great character in his short time on screen, and I can't wait to see what happens next with him.

WHAT I DISLIKED

Revealing that Loki was D.B. Cooper: A cute scene, but it's really unnecessary. It adds nothing to the plot, and I feel like if it was cut out entirely, it wouldn't have been the end of the world...Yeah. That's it.

That's my one and only complaint about this season.

Maybe some scenes drag a bit, and I guess Episode Three is kind of the weakest, but there's not really anything that this series does poorly that warrants an in-depth complaint.

Nope.

Nothing at all...

…

...

...I'm not touching that "controversy" of Loki falling for Sylvie instead of Mobius. That's a situation where there are no winners.

Only losers.

Exclusively losers.

Other than that, this season was amazing!

IN CONCLUSION

I'd give the first season of Loki a well-earned A, with a 9.5 through my usual MCU ranking system. It turns out, it really is the best type of wackiness that was just too good to fail. The characters are fun and likable, the comedy and drama worked excellently, and the expansive world-building made me really intrigued with the more we learned. It's hard to say if Season Two will keep this momentum, but that's for the future to figure out. For now, let's just sit back and enjoy the chaos.

(Now, if you don't excuse me, I have to figure out how to review Marvel's What If...)

[prose-for-hire]

Gone datin’

Pairing: Spike x fem!reader

Request(s): 

Can I request a spike x female reader where they’re dating but can’t usually go on dates but then he finds the gem of amara and surprises her with a cute picnic date and he is really sweet with her?

spike and his gf on a date.

A/N: Hope you don’t mind but I’ve combined these together, you both wanted female reader and a date. Also, I wrote it where he’d had the gem before, but gets it back.

You were resting in the lower level of Spike’s most recent resting place. You lay on your side, resting against his naked chest. Drawing small patterns on his chest as you thought about how happy you were with this man. He let you trace along his body, enjoying it when you did it. You press a small kiss to some exposed skin, propping yourself up to look at him. His arm was behind his head, lying flat, he loved moments alone with you like this.

“Spike, why do you never take me on dates? We are dating after all���” You say softly as he stroked along your arm, leaving goose bumps in his wake.

“What do you want one of them for?” he asked, scanning your face, “And more to the point, why have you never taken me on one?” He mused, questioning you back with a raise of his eyebrow. This was fair enough, you had never suggested a real human date before, you were both usually content with being together like this. Or having a drink at a bar. You were comfortable together, you just wished sometimes that you could go on a normal date. Your words made him think – he wanted you to have a proper date. Something he hadn’t been able to give you, but now he desperately longed to.

In the week after this conversation, you felt a little excited. Spike wasn’t very good with sunlight. Or pointy wooden objects through the chest. Or pretending to care about trivial matters. So, when he started to talk about going out on a date more often since you mentioned it, you got excited. But then it stopped. He stopped talking about it, he shut down any mention of a date that wasn’t at his favourite demon bar and he suddenly had to take a trip to LA where you were definitely not invited. You tried not to worry, you tried to convince yourself he didn’t have a secret vampire lover that he was leaving you for. What he hadn’t informed you of, was that he had been trying to plan the perfect date. But one tiny detail was getting in his way every time: he couldn’t take you anywhere in the day and he decided that you should have everything perfect. Like in the books he would read.

It had been another week, he didn’t talk on the phone so you hadn’t heard from him while he was in LA. You were worried. When he finally returned, his face was oddly tanned and you frowned. Maybe he had discovered fake tan in LA. You thought he looked cute with a little colour in his face and you told him this. His eyes widened, he hadn’t noticed. He gruffly thanked you and left to speak to someone about something you didn’t quite catch.

It was a few more days of weird behaviour from Spike and you were starting to get ready to confront him. It was out of character. But then you got a call from Willow telling you to meet her in the park, it left your mind. You could vent to your friend, maybe ask for some advice. It did cross your mind that this was unusual, your friend was now spending a lot of her spare time with her new friend Tara and had forgotten you existed. You understood but you couldn’t help feeling a little friend envy. However, you were pleasantly surprised when she asked to meet you.

You got there and there was a picnic set up: a tartan blanket laid on the grassy bank, a large wicker basket in the centre. There was wine glasses out and even a little flower that had been plucked, roots and all from the ground only moments before. You frowned at Willow, wondering what was going on. It appeared to be a date, you joked to yourself that Willow might have become a lesbian overnight. However, the redhead was getting ready to leave as soon as she saw you.

“Uh, um, I’m gonna make with the leaving now – I was part of a cunning ruse. Have fun!” She shouted over her shoulder, no doubt about to find Tara. You sat, frowning around the sunny spot. Then you saw him. Your mouth agape, eyes on stalks as he sauntered over to you as if this was normal. He soaked up the sun, closing his eyes briefly at the warmth before his gaze landing back on you.

His still pale skin almost unnatural under the sunlight, black t-shirt clinging to his well-toned physique. He made his way across the grass, looking up slightly at the blue sky a smug little smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. This turned into a full-on grin as he threw himself down opposite you on the blanket.

“All right, love? This enough of a date for you or did you want to be going on one of those long walks on the beach?” He smiled, opening the wicker basket. He was acting as if this was the most normal thing in the world. You were speechless. You looked up at the sun, then back at him what must have been about fifty times before your voice managed to actually work, “How…?”

“Love finds a way” he said cryptically, “I can’t wait to see if I freckle” he added with a wink as he chucked you some of the prepared food and took out a jar of blood for himself. He had taken care of finding your favourites. His smug smile lit up, almost brighter than the sun, as you just stared at him all not on fire and pleased with himself.

After the third time you asked, between bites of the best sandwich you had ever eaten, he sighed animatedly using his shoulders to exaggerate his unneeded expel of breath, “Went to see a man about a ring. Don’t get too excited, love, it was for me - got myself a new little trinket” he showed you the ring on his finger. You grabbed his hand to check it.

“The gem of amara!? I thought that was gone!” You squealed in excitement for him and then for yourself as this meant he could come out in the day too. This wasn’t a one-off. You were still holding his hands, squeezing so tight before letting go to get back to the picnic.

“Well, couldn’t let my favourite girl living her life without a proper date now could I? I’m evil, but not that bloody evil” He shrugged, downplaying what he had to do to get the ring back. There was a lot of fighting and he even had to do a little bit of begging to his least favourite grandsire (Which, turned out to be useless and he had to trade punches with him to get the ring back anyway). He hadn’t been so bothered about the loss of the gem until recently.

“You- you got it back for me? For us to have a date?” You gasped, in awe at the way he loved so deeply. So selflessly with you. He had done this for you first, himself second.

“’Course, love. I want you happy. Besides, you’re bloody gorgeous with decent lighting” he complimented you, with a wink. You couldn’t help smiling, he was a charmer and you could tell he was pleased with your excitement over the date. Seeing you happy makes him happy and he caught your infectious smile as you started to root in the wicker basket to find pretty much all of your favourite snacks piled in there, “Listen, pet, I love you and love’s a funny thing. It makes you want to do things just to make others happy. Makes you want to sacrifice everything just to see that smile. That flutter in your chest when you see me, when you feel the care I have for you” he said quickly, looking into the contents of the jar as he spoke before looking up to meet your eye, “I can’t stop thinking about you… thinking about ways to show my affection”

“I love you, spike, this is- this is the best date ever” You gushed, crawling across the blanket to envelop him in a hug. You pressed your lips against his, an excitable kiss to confirm your love.

“Well, I plan on next week’s being even better, so hold that thought pet” He smiled as you grinned so wide your cheeks started to ache, moving back to look at him. He had already started planning a date for next week, somewhere sunny and fun for you. Perhaps the beach, he remembered you said you liked that time you went for a daytrip with the Scoobies, wishing he could have been with you.

You offered to rub some sunscreen into his skin. Luckily you kept a high spf on you so he wouldn’t burn. He wasn’t used to it, so he had forgotten about potentially burning. He complained for a while, finding it lame, but softened at the care and stubbornness you displayed until he relented and allowed you to rub the sunscreen into his skin.

You both lay back, sunbathing on the tartan blanket. Spike squinted up into the perfect blue sky, amazed that it hadn’t changed since he remembered it. The sun continued beating down on you pleasantly, it was bliss. Warm rays of afternoon sun licking at your faces. You held hands, laying side-by-side as you relaxed lazily under the heat. This was the first of many enjoyable dates under the cheery supervision of the sun.