#also my shakespeare nerd is showing lol

[totallyboatless]

It is time, friends, for another Pip's Weed Essay game. The rules: I'm about to take an edible and start writing a mini-essay in one sitting. I edit a tiny bit as I go, but for the most part this is on the fly. I've thought about this topic a lot, but haven't outlined it. I'll let you know when the edible hits, but there's a chance you'll realize it before I do. (PIRATE FRIENDS STICK AROUND - this is Pip from the future, I get pretty high in this, but anyway I'm here to tell you that this goes in a very unintended OFMD direction that i'm still reeling from. Anyway back to Past Pip)

Edible ingestion commencing, time: 7:37pm Mountain Time

I polled my followers for the topic, so today we're going to talk about:

Fixing the Puck Problem

I've read and seen A Midsummer Night's Dream more than any other Shakespeare play. At this point I don't know if I've seen it so much because it's my favorite, or enough opportunities for me to see it have lined up that it's become my favorite by default. It's easily the Shakespeare play I know best. I haven't seen a staging that I fully disliked, but there are two elements of this show that I feel like are rarely handled the way I want them to be.

Problem one:

Puck will never be as funny as Bottom

It's common to consider Puck to be the main character of A Midsummer Night's Dream. He's at the very least the most famous character in the play. Puck is a dream role, and obviously with his being a fairy, he's usually directed to be weird and whimsical--and a lot of the time, playing for laughs. It makes sense, he's a trickster, it's built into his nature.

But in modern day, his lines and actions don't translate as well as Bottom's. In all of the times that I've seen A Midsummer Night's Dream, I've *never* seen a production where Bottom fails to steal the entire show away from Puck. I've had multiple experiences where I could feel the director wanting me to laugh at Puck; I could see the reasons for the direction, but it just wouldn't hit. In those same productions, I've laughed so hard at the Bottom scenes that I cried.

I'm thinking particularly of the 2010 production with Judy Dench reprising Titania (honestly still in shock over seeing that lolol) and the 2019 Bridge Theatre production (which you can find streaming, it's *incredible*).

In the 2010 show, the Puck actor kept doing what honestly felt like a Woody the Woodpecker impression lol. He would pause for laughs and they just...wouldn't happen. Meanwhile, Bottom was set up with the kind of success that let him steal at least one scene from fucking Judy Dench.

In the 2019 Bridge Theatre production, I genuinely like the direction they gave Puck--he's a weird little twitchy Irish punk doing fucking aerial silk shit. But even with a unique vibe and a fun performance, it's still not enough to outshine Bottom.

Basically my thing is that I want to get to the end of A Midsummer Night's Dream and feel more connected to Puck. I *want* him to be my favorite. And there's just absolutely no way to make him my favorite if his core purpose is to be funny. Puck is supposed to be a larger-than-life being--the audience is never going to buy that when he's not even the largest character on the stage.

The second problem is smaller, and in fixing it there's also a fun chance to fix the Puck problem:

Problem two:

The audience usually doesn't understand why Titania and Oberon are fighting.

If you've gotten this far you're probably already a nerd who knows this, but gonna pose the question like I've done for other people I've seen the show with: Why are Titania and Oberon fighting? What's the core reason?

Bc you're a fucking nerd you probably yelled CHANGELING! Which yes, good for you, if I had become the Shakespeare professor I wanted to be but didn't have the money to become, you would be in my class and I would throw a snickers at you for a reward.

But the thing is, a *lot* of people who only know the play casually don't know. And most productions don't assist them in knowing.

Elaboration for non-nerds: Titania had a "and they were roommates" totally not at all lesbian relationship with a human women who was pregnant. The women dies in childbirth and Titania takes the child to raise, and she cherishes him more than anything, which is an extremely straight thing to do. In the play, the character is only referred to as the changeling. Oberon gets super jealous of this kid and wants to steal him away and make him join the Wild Hunt so that he can have Titania's full attention back, because he's got that issue creepy men get when they have kids and then are like "I'm jealous of my son because he's making it less likely for me to fuck my wife" and it's like "dude calm down with this projection of an Oedipal complex."

If you're not a coward and read Titania as in love with the changeling's mom, then Oberon's issues are maybe slightly less creepy, but like not really

So that's it really. Titania loves this kid of her sapphic lover that died. Oberon is jealous about it. He decides to play a trick on Titania both as a way to get revenge, and also as a distraction so he can steal the kid.

But the issue is that 1.) all of this is communicated in a long and kind of boring speech, and 2.) the changeling literally never has a line and also no stage directions

The 2010 production had a hot dude chained up and writhing on stage in a kind of hot dance snake movement thing when Titania talks about him, but most productions never even have an actor cast as the changeling. I was really shocked they didn't have anyone for the 2019 production, given how much I love most of the rest of their choices.

OKAY SO. We now have the two problems: Puck isn't the fan favorite even though he should be; and most people in the audience have no fucking idea about the changeling.

(THIS IS HIGH PIP FROM THE FUTURE I FORGOT SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT TO THIS PROBLEM: If you do know about the changeling/follow along with that plot, it's *very* hard to root for Titania and Oberon when they reconcile. Which can be fun and cool and a little hot even maybe if you're going all dark, but thIS IS A PLAY ABOUT HORNY FAERIES HAVING A GOOD TIME so I won't be having that. I want this play to make me like that Titania forgives Oberon so easily. Okay Past Pip, take it away)

lol okay yeah weed friend has landed, I just wandered away for a minute with a desperate need to put taquitos in the air fryer. Time stamp: 8:16.

OKAY FOR REAL NOW LET'S GET INTO:

Pip's Most Ideal Staging of A Midsummer Night's Dream Which Fixes the Problems in Theory

The Staging:

First off I want the production to be in the middle of the literal woods where there's pretty lights in all the trees and people are sitting on blankets and have snacks and drinks and drugs and whatever they want, and the whole staging has the actors weaving through the audience. Not just theatre in the round, full immersion

I also want people to not fully know where the production is, just that it's on the outskirts of the forest, and then the actors emerge from the woods at a designated time and bring the audience to the secret stage section. And ideally this would be like a park on the outskirts of woods so that there would also be people there who wouldn't know what the fuck was going on. And ideally some of the fairy actors convince them to come along and the people go having no idea what they're about to get into. That's how A Midsummer Night's Dream is meant to be experienced in its purest form: with actors dressed as fairies trying to seduce unsuspecting strangers to follow them into the woods to an unknown location where they'll probably be offered drugs.

TAQUITO TIME

Taquitos acquired.

Puck's direction and motivation:

When Puck is first introduced, it's by a fairy called Peasblossom who's otherwise not a big part. Peasblossom lets the audience know who Puck/Robin Goodfellow is by basically going stan-mode and being like "holy shit you're famous." PB literally starts listing his greatest hits.

So picture with me: instead of an extremely fairy-like whimsical Puck, I want a Puck that wanders on-stage like a burnt-out rockstar. Cigarette in one hand, beer in another. Probably on a cocktail for faerie super magic mushrooms. Just fully numbed out. In this moment, Puck feels way more human than faerie--and I want the performance to be in a way where that feels off. To have it be communicated in manner and clothing, and the juxtaposition of PB recounting Puck's glory days, that Puck hasn't always been like this. This isn't a faerie trickster in his prime. This is a man who's lost all sense of fun and is going through the motions.

That's what happens, right, when you become just a little too famous?

Puck is the only one of the main characters who gets to the end of the show and is entirely alone.

(my favorite thing about being high is how *good* it makes food taste, these taquitos are not fancy but with the power of the devil's lettuce it's so good--oh my god I have Dr. Pepper)

(I'm back with the Dr. Pepper. I'm having fun, are you guys having fun? If you've made it this far i kiss u)

So Puck is alone at the end of the play while everyone else of import is either with their lover or with their theatre-kid-found-family. And it's largely because Puck lives between worlds. He's not powerful enough to be fey royalty; he's Oberon's right-hand man, but he's not Oberon's peer. But the lower fey court are also not his peers -- they treat him like a celebrity, he can't actually connect with them. He's not allowed to frolic and play with them anymore, not really.

With this interpretation and direction, we now have a Puck whose action in the plot can lead to a happy ending (keep with me), and whose existence isn't just to be quirky and whimsical for the audience. Instead it's a Puck with a motivation: he's lost all joy in his job, he's disconnected from him community, and Oberon only treats him like a fuckbuddy so he's sexually frustrated. (Oh right yeah I was supposed to write about how Puck is in love with Oberon. He is.) That's all fucking sad, bro! And you know from the Pip that traveled into the past that this play is fun and should be fun!

Now for the final part, where we put in the special ingredient to tie this particular Puck direction into the happy ending:

LET'S 👏 GET 👏 GAY 👏

Do you guys (gn) remember the changeling? It was like possibly an hour ago, the time-warp this particular edible always sets me on has fully set in. It's possible this essay is like 5k words long. It's also possible it's only 500 words long. I wish I was lying when I told you I don't know.

Anyway, the changeling. Let's make him a fuller character and let's give him to Puck wrapped up in a sexy, charming bow.

Picture this: The Changeling, from now on capitalized as a character, shown on stage in Titania's court. Locked up like a princess in a tower because Titania is desperate to protect him. And the Changeling is all *sigh and flutter big beautiful princess man eyes* because he wants to explore what's out there. Because he's a man who's grown up and been forced to live between two worlds. He's not fey royalty, he's not Titania's actual kid and she kind of honestly treats him more like a momento of her lesbian lover than an actual adopted kid. He can't be one of the fey court, because he's not fey, and also he's not allowed to frolic and play with them.

That should sound familiar to you if I did it right.

Puck and the Changeling, both feeling the same sort of empty spot. So let's smush them together.

Give the Changeling all of Peasblossom's lines. It makes more sense for a detail I left out before, too--Peasblossom doesn't recognize Puck they see him for the first few lines. Once they do they're all like "omg you're the dude that makes people horny for each other and also some other trickster things." They know all of Puck's stunts, but they don't know what he looks like? It's clearly an exposition device, but it's a weak one (sorry, Shakesy). He's the rockstar of the fey world. You'd have to be living under a rock or, I dunno, locked away like a beautiful man-princess --

(Okay you know where I'm going and I have to stop there because I'm cry laughing, I swear to you -- I swear to fucking god, guys, I wish I was joking -- I thought I was being cute and clever saying "man-princess". Not because of irony. IT'S BECAUSE I FORGOT THERE IS A WORD FOR A PRINCESS WHO IS A MAN AND THAT IS A PRINCE. Okay i should clearly wrap this up lol)

In this staging, the Changeling clearly doesn't want to be locked up. So...he finally finds a way to sneak out. He goes on a romp through the forest and that's when he runs into Puck (this is the scene where we first meet Puck). The Changeling wouldn't recognize Puck, though he's have heard of him. He probably loves stories because what the fuck else does he have to do, so he's asked the fairies to tell him about Puck's adventures over and over. Meanwhile, Puck wouldn't recognize the Changeling because Titania has been keeping him so under lock and key. It allows an opportunity for them to connect on more of a peer basis as they--

Holy fuck. Wait. Hold on. Is the Changeling Stede. Is Puck Ed. What the fuck. Did I write an AU on accident. I don't even like AUs very much (sorry AU writers it's not personal it's just not my thing).n ANYWAY sorry for the pirate aside. God this is properly off the rails now.

They like each other, you get it. And now Puck has someone he wants to impress. There's not a lot of opportunities to give the Changeling more lines, but that doesn't mean he can't appear on stage. He can stay with Puck (hiding from Oberon whenever he's there, leading to some good chances for physical comedy) and go on the nighttime adventure of his dreams.

This leads to a fun, unique choice: having Puck fuck up the love flower juice plan on purpose. So that he can show this hot dude following him around with wide enthusiastic eyes the kind of things he's capable of OH MY GOD THIS IS ED AND STEDE I SWEAR THIS IS NOT ON PURPOSE I AM JUST NOW SEEING THE PARALLEL

Okay we're nearly at the end I promise. We just have one more problem to solve: How are we supposed to root for Titania and Oberon to get together when Oberon literally publicly humiliates her and then steals her adopted son and forces him to join the Wild Hunt even tho Titania REALLY doesn't want him to? Well, the first one is easy, Titania and Oberon are so fucking kinky, and Oberon likes getting cucked (remember he's only jealous of the Changeling, never the lesbian).

The second one is also easy. Make it the Changeling's choice. Leaving Titania and joining Oberon's court means two things: He gets to be with Puck, and joining the Wild Hunt allows him to go on exciting adventures. If Titania saw that the Changeling wanted this with the staging that both Titania and Oberon look over and see Puck and the Changeling making out right after Titania's spell is broken. Then Oberon can jokingly delivers the line about having stolen the Changeling, realizing that the plan worked but in the most ridiculous way possible. And how could Titania not find joy in all of that?

It makes me so much more glad to see them get back together.

Puck's closing soliloquy is his most famous, but I like his last big monologue right before it better. There's a very important line he says that communicates an important shift within the context of his particular staging:

And we fairies, that do run

We.

Puck isn't a lonely, washed-up rockstar anymore. He's part of a "we." Not just the Changeling, but the other fairies, too. Puck and the Changeling act as bridges for each other, to be part of each other's worlds in a way that feels like a whole -- OH MY GOD IT IS ED AND STEDE

Puck being alone on stage isn't so sad anymore, after all that. Because Puck, who starts off the play with so little sense of belonging, now has so much to go back to.

And that's it, that's my ideal staging of this play. Honestly, I really, really want to direct it. I have no experience directing but I have the audacity to think I could do it lol. No resources, tho

OH ONE LAST THING HELENA NEEDS TO BE INTO PUP PLAY

also the lovers are all in a polycule, that's just a given, any other staging is cowardly

alright bbye

[exit]

final time stamp: 9:25 PM, not rereading, just hitting post. We die like Mercutio.

[viola-ophelia]

some john andre propaganda because he's the sexyman of my heart:

i feel like people sometimes forget how genuinely kind andre is since there's more focus on his hoeing activities lolll, but he really does have a strong moral compass & try to do right by everyone. think about how hard he tried to make abigail feel comfortable and valued in his home, knowing she'd been sent there against her will and had been separated from her son. while he's far from perfect by modern standards, he's one of the few characters in the show who consistently makes an effort to treat enslaved people with humanity.

i've touched on this before, but i really do think andre drinks respect women juice. while ben (and to a lesser degree, abe and caleb) spend 4 seasons not believing that women have a place in the war, and unsuccessfully trying to keep their female friends/wives out of spying despite the fact that mary/anna/abigail are far more competent than they are lol, andre was working with philomena (and later, peggy) from day one. he doesn't treat women like delicate flowers who need to be sheltered, and he recognizes their power, which is why when peggy expressed willingness to help him, he took her up on it. i think it's doing peggy a real disservice to argue that andre somehow tricked/manipulated her into getting trapped in his spy scheme... she's one of the smartest people in the show, and she definitely knew what she was getting into. she fell for andre, and wanted to help him, because she recognized that he viewed her as an EQUAL, not as a pawn or a prize to be won.

i know we all love hewlett's nerdiness, but you know who is also a nerd? john andre! he can recite shakespeare! he can play love songs on the flute AND the violin! he geeked out so hard over ben franklin's inventions! he draws and paints! he makes music and dancing metaphors constantly! i'm convinced that he would be such a good person to infodump to. i just know that when peggy talks to him for 5 hours straight about fashion, he's taking notes AND active listening.

there is no doubt in my mind that john andre is the best turn character in bed. i mean, he wasn't "hung" for no reason! ;)

it is true that andre is not the most skilled fighter in the show lol. in fact, we never even see him fire a gun or engage in active combat, since he's usually pulling strings behind the scenes, and he doesn't seem to ever use torture as an espionage method. plus, those henchmen of roberts' took him down pretty fast when they captured him lol. but in my humble opinion, while it CAN be hot when men are getting all muddy and bloody on the battlefield, it's actually endearing to me that andre doesn't seem to enjoy violence. i don't want a man who might murder me at any second! i want a man who will treat me right! i want a man who would "quaker marry" me and cut off his little braid and give it to me as a token of his love!!

in conclusion, here are some gifs of him because JUST LOOK AT HIM. HE IS SO HOT

[kiwiana-writes]

WITH SO MUCH OF MY HEART (THAT NONE IS LEFT TO PROTEST) by @kiwiana-writes

Fandom: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor Characters: Alex Claremont-Diaz, Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, Rafael Luna, June Claremont-Diaz, Nora Holleran, Percy "Pez" Okonjo, Beatrice Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, David the Beagle (Red White & Royal Blue), Zahra Bankston, Liam (Red White & Royal Blue), Catherine Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Actors, Enemies to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Bisexual Disaster Alex Claremont-Diaz, Canon Dialogue, like an embarrassing amount of it actually but whatever, and I am including Much Ado dialogue in that as well as RWRB, Much Ado About Nothing, Much Ado About Nothing References, Inspired by Shakespeare, References to Shakespeare, in which the author nerds out about Shakespeare and queerness and also drops a James Bond deep cut, Slow Burn, not the relationship so much but the writing definitely, once they actually get together it’s kind of a relationship speedrun if we’re being honest, but we take a while to work up to the rating sorry, let Rafael Luna be the queer mentor Alex deserves, Epistolary, so much epistolary nonsense scattered throughout, Smut, Grief/Mourning, not at the same time lol, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, First Time Blow Jobs, First Time Bottoming, Semi-Public Sex, Homophobia, Racism, Communication Failure, Panic Attacks, Canon-Typical Angat, Angst With a Happy Ending, POV Alternating Summary: Alex is a former child star struggling to make the transition into being seen as a serious actor. He jumps at an opportunity to perform on stage in the UK, seeing it as a way to break free from the typecasting and show what he can really do. But he wasn’t prepared to star alongside someone he hates. // Henry is a recent theatre graduate who accepts an amazing role in a queer reimagining of Much Ado About Nothing. And then it turns out his co-star is none other than the man he’s been hopelessly pining after for years—even though Henry made a terrible first impression when they met. // It’s… well, it’s practically Shakespearean.

Complete fic

Act I: I, II, III Act II: I, II, III Act III: I, II, III, IV, V Act IV: I, II Act V: I, II, III, IV

***

Part Two: The star to every wandering bark

Fandom: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor Characters: Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, Alex Claremont-Diaz, June Claremont-Diaz, Ellen Claremont, Oscar Diaz (Red White & Royal Blue), Leo (Red White & Royal Blue), Liam (Red White & Royal Blue), Catherine Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Actors, 5 Things, 5 Times, 5+1 Things, Fluff, tagging too extensively will spoil part 1 of this series, but trust that it's fluff and joy all the way down, spoilery summary is in the notes!, Implied/Referenced Sex, POV Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor Summary: A 5+1 coda-ish thing set through the back half of the With so much of my heart (that none is left to protest) epilogue!

***

Part Three: Thus may poor fools believe false teachers

Fandom: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Oscar Diaz & Rafael Luna Characters: Rafael Luna, Oscar Diaz, Jeffrey Richards, Alex Claremont-Diaz (mentioned) Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Actors, Homophobia, Bittersweet ending, but part one of the series makes it all better, POV Rafael Luna Summary: Rafael's POV of the Dad's Way cancellation; a prequel to With so much of my heart (that none is left to protest)

***

Part Four: Nature's infinite book of secrecy

Fandom: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, Oscar Diaz & Rafael Luna, Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor & Rafael Luna Characters: Rafael Luna, Oscar Diaz, Alex Claremont-Diaz, Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, Ellen Claremont, Leo, Oliver Westbrook Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Actors, 5 Things, 5 Times, 5+1 Things, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Bets & Wagers, POV Rafael Luna, and then as a bonus, POV Oscar Diaz Summary: Five times Rafael tried to figure out when Henry might propose and one time Oscar did something with that information; a sequel to With so much of my heart (that none is left to protest)

[legs-art]

ELEMENTAL REALM / ECLECTIC CHAMBER OCS!

Hiiiiiii first art post I'm sharing publicly! This has been a month in the making but it's so worth it. These are a handful of characters in my OC universe, the Elemental Realm! AKA the Eclectic Chamber, I'm currently going through a name change from elemental realm to eclectic chamber. Don't worry about that.

Italicized names mean those are placeholders while I still try to come up with a better name. For some, those placeholders have been there for years :P whoops

These comprise pretty much all the significant characters I have (with a guideline of appearing in at least 2 stories although there's some exceptions). There are roughly another 100 or so characters that I opted not to include because they're either not as significant, I don't have an interesting design for them, or I just didn't feel like it. Full namedrop behind the read more in case you're interested! Maybe I'll do a part 2 of this in a year or so, who knows.

If there's any characters here that tickle your fancy, shoot an ask or a comment for me to infodump about them! Quality of infodumping may vary, especially considering I still have to step around spoilers and whatnot, but I'm very interested to show you how these characters have been sculpted in my head over these past several years. (Also, I will be revealing some info about the story ideas I already have in mind for the Elemental Realm soon, so stay tuned for that!)

Uhhhhhh yeah. Hopefully I'm not forgetting to say anything important. I really love what I made lol I hope I can finally start moving this universe outside of my head and into the world ^_^

Anyway, yeah, sorry to the following for not making the cut:

The Pawn

OBJECT

Pirate Cat

Frost Wyvern

The Other Plant Species

Ishmael

Olive Hills Grandmother

Disco Restituo Grandmother

TVHead Salesperson

The Hidden Prime Minister

AtmOS

Operatic Nobeard

KUR-180 (Ferret Form)

Hyperlink Trace II

Squirrel

Wibblewobble Vortex

Cuttlefish "Danger" Aromantic

Sporror

Teodoro Locksmith

Galleria Monies

Vapo Sea Devil

Sternum Crease

Base Sorceress

Nom Diamonds

Zareen Hangus

Mark Genuine

Blundered Impersonator

Alice

Senderman

Jasper

Cow Cowboy

Blood Knight

Ice Prince

Ice Squid

Ice Cephalopod

Stratos

Kozmo

Old Guy With Badger Stand

Overseer

Loomynutty

Blobular Shapeshifter

Santa

Krampus

Chad Shakespeare

Angelsbane

Elephant Friend

The Tourist Trap

Fluffy Boy Rabbit

Fluffy Boy Bear

TTRPG Komodo Dragon

Windmill Gnome

Robot Police Dog

Little Mouse Guy

Perfect Soup Nerd Bird

Sentient Tiny Hot Air Balloon

Lugnarts

Verde Mermaid

Clownimatronic / The Machine

The Crescents

Suntronic

Mongoose Man

Blizzard Wizard

Kulfi Wala

The Beast

Still Chaos Penguin

Caged Water Beast

Metakellos

Monsterfucker Snake Robot

Rodrigo

Crystal Aurora King

Star Matter Ursa

Glorp

ANN-13

Crysple

X-02

Pyramid Of Mayhem

Fishbowl

Top Hat

Alien Traffic Control Tower

Fridgey

Dice

Easel

The Stalker

Majesty Of Colors

Andromeda V5

[saturnplaza]

Alright, you said to ask you stuff so uh. Hmmm. Do you have a fav mcr album? Or a current fav mcr song? My current fav song is our lady of sorrows :D

Uhh. I’m really into theater, do you like theater at all? Do you have a favorite play/ musical? Mine is Chicago, simply because it was the most recent show I performed in (I was Billy Flynn! It was awesome :D) and I’m rather emotionally attached to it. I’m also very partial to Shakespeare.

What brand of hair dye do you use? I like splat just cuz the color stays in a long time

What’s your favorite subject in school? Why?

Uhhh. I can’t think of that many more questions lol 😭 I tried my best, enjoy the questions, get back to me if you feel like it lol

EEEEEEEEE THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!!

My favorite MCR album has to be either Danger Days or The Black Parade -- The Black Parade means a lot to me emotionally and Danger Days I just really love concept albums.

For songs I don't even know, it's so hard to choose. But probably Destroya, Ghost of You, and/or House of Wolves OH, AND DESERT SONG (actually Desert Song is the winner)

I can't believe I forgot abt Desert Song it's literally one of my favorite songs of all time 😭😭

I am into musical theater, and I always have been --- I've been in a few plays myself --- I haven't seen Chicago though, I will be checking it out though!! As for a favorite play of mine, I really don't know. I don't think I could decide. Most of the plays I've played in were like Disney movies.

I use L'oreal Paris for literally everything all my colors and bleach as well // which is not the best for my hair but whatever 😭😭

I'm a huge English nerd, it's always been my favorite subject

THANK YOU AGAIN FOR THE ASKS -- THEY WHERE VERY FUN TO ANSWER!! <333

[ralphlanyon]

For the TC ask game: 2, 6, 10, 15, 17, 22, and 24!

2. Scene that lives in your head rent free.

So many! But I'll go with "Come and say goodbye to me," which speaks for itself.

6. Wackiest (but hilarious) Laurie opinion™.

Laurie trying to convince himself that Ralph and Bunny are happily in love despite all evidence to the contrary and that he isn't incredibly jealous and resentful of Bunny!

10. Laurie/Andrew and Laurie/Ralph: discuss.

Obviously I'm a Ralph Lanyon and Ralph/Laurie girlie through and through! I think they are just extremely similar and compatible, in terms of their personalities, their idealism, their values, their sense of humor, their beliefs and attitudes towards queerness and towards the war, their past trauma, their need to be needed, their intense loneliness and desire for intimacy and affection (and of course Renault makes it clear that they are very sexually compatible). They also both understand what it's like to be abandoned by a parent, to become permanently and visibly disabled by war injury, and to not feel a sense of belonging or attachment to anywhere. So many themes and parallels with their relationship - it makes the literature nerd in me happy. 🤩

Laurie/Andrew doesn't have nearly the same emotional pull for me, although intellectually I get its place in the novel and Laurie's development. Part of it is that for most of the book Laurie seems to be unconsciously projecting his fantasy of school-age Ralph onto Andrew (as well as various moral ideals), so I never felt like I got to truly know Andrew as a person (or that Laurie did, for that matter), just what Laurie thinks he is, or ought to be. It's not an accident I think that Andrew is the same age as Ralph when we first meet him (and when Laurie last sees him at school) and that he often feels less a fully fleshed out character than an ideal Laurie carries in his head.

15. At which point did you know TC was going to be One Of Those Books for you?

Haha, I will have you know that the first time I read the book, I was being perfectly normal about it up until the party chapter, and then Ralph showed up again and ruined my life and now I'm here eight years later still totally obsessed! If it had ended unhappily with Ralph dying or Laurie and Ralph not getting back together (which would have been the conventional Queer Novel ending back then), I probably would have just moved on, but it had the temerity to actually end on a hopeful/happy note so I guess I'm just going to be invested forever.

17. Most ??? passage (ambiguous/unclear/etc)

"As Laurie got up he found he was levering himself on a pile of hymn books; some almost submerged tactile memory remarked, Ancient and Modern, not Songs of Praise." I was not Raised In A Christian Home and still do not get why that distinction is at all relevant, lol.

22. What was the soldier at the party about to reveal about Alec/Ralph?

Hmm, I actually didn't interpret it as being about Alec/Ralph specifically, just about Ralph! I thought he was going to drop some salacious gossip about Ralph's sex life or kinks - like "The man acts all uptight and strait-laced, disapproving of everything going on here, but I hear this is how he really behaves when he's in bed..." And then Laurie cuts him off with, "I've known him for years," which the soldier interprets as, "I've slept with him," prompting him to ask Laurie for confirmation if the sex gossip about Ralph is true.

24. Most surprisingly modern aspect of TC.

I guess actually acknowledging that bisexuality exists, even briefly? Ralph rattling off the historical figures he considers bisexuals and Ralph and Laurie talking about Shakespeare being "normal plus, not minus" amusingly remind me of how queer people nowadays discuss their favorite queer historical icons.

[oh-cawsh]

9 people to get to know better

thanks for tagging me @ghostradiodylan !!

1. Three ships: Rylan my beloved they do no wrong. theyre the epitome of awkward bashful and honest gay summer teen romance with the perfect contrasting note of horrific life threatening monsters which is unsurpassable genre peak. and yeah ngl its pretty rare that i get behind a ship but two others i can think of are amity/luz from the owl house (but mostly in season 1 because they do cute anxious crushing stuff and after that they just kind of turn into supportive gf A and supportive gf B), and legosi/louis from beastars because how do you just gloss over neurotic homophobe slut ptsd theatre twink x weird brooding puritan loser freudian pervert and the fact that it does WORK too like hello

2. First ever ship: i wanna say gregg and angus from night in the woods?? i remember i was in that weird sexual orientation puberty where you literally know you're gay but it's not like a consciously meaningful part of your identity so i remember seeing them and thinking wow that's cool that they're boyfriends i guess idk. also i'm inexorably drawn to their existence for some reason and my lockscreen is them cuddling with the lazy morning light peeking through the curtains

3. Last song: My Kink is Karma - Chappell Roan, im a sucker for moody electronic pop and that album DELIVERS

4. Last film: i watched the first three movies in a pirates of the caribbean marathon with some friends which ngl after the first one feels like trying to suck sugar water out of a sock 😶 the last film i personally chose to watch was the 1976 Carrie! it was nice being able to watch it and appreciate it as an adult with an education and not a teen recluse going "yeah carrie you show those villain highschoolers what's what"

5. Currently (re)reading: Shakespeare's Twelfth Night! i have my old copy from highschool open next to me and the 2012 shakespeare's globe production up and i just sit and sift between watching and reading and analysing it, just like when i first learned it in class. i'm not really sure why i wanted to reread it again in the first place, but i find it kind of soothing to read older texts where the language and culture's a little ways off from its modern successors. i find it calming to kind of pull those stories back in a way we can understand with its old contexts and writing, and see more and more of that timeless human experience shine through. sudoku for english nerds i guess LOL

6. Currently watching: my watcher's stamina has actually gotten so shit im ngl like i actually haven't watched a show in months 😭😭😭 the last show i watched was bluey (which was pretty good! (and pretty indicative of the kind of attention span ive got these days 😂👌))

7. Currently consuming: this horrible like nutraloaf nightmare bowl i made because my appetite was really poor today and at 5 pm or so i was like ugh well id better eat something quick and dense if im not gonna have a proper meal so i insulted God and put together reheated smashed potato (in the microwave so they lost all their crunch and flavour) + dried roasted edamame beans + peanut butter + regular butter + cheddar + yoghurt + whole salted almonds in a bowl and had a slice of walnut fig cake as a side. that thing needed a censor bar like i was in the trenches trying to get that down im ngl. eating that meal took more energy out of me than what it gave back like i knew i made something unholy and then immediately paid for it like it was so frankenstein and his monster right there on that kitchen counter

8. Currently craving: literally anything after that like god damn 😭😭😭😭😭 otherwise ive been hankering for a good chana masala and naan combo cus there's literally never a day where i'll turn south asian cuisine down like aw man i shouldve just gone out and got some of that to eat today ugh god damn it

also im ngl i don't really know who to tag cus i only started having a presence on tumblr like barely a month ago and ive only meaningfully interacted with like 3 people since then so um!! whoever's out there lurking around on my blog if ya wanna participate feel free! and either way, thanks for readin my ramblings regardless :)

[autistic-sidestep]

uno_reverse_card.gif im cheating and using a few ideas from the meme bc i have No braincells but i DO crave that suranga lore SO--

favorite color to wear AND favorite color in general, if they're different things; favorite genre of any media AND what his favorite type of media is (music, movies, shows, etc), favorite person, AND what he thinks abt the rat king :3

k lets finally fuckign answer this

favourite colour: phthalo green! namely why it's a very core part of the argos suit. they like wearing blacks/greys/dark greens and blues, those tend to lean into the more professional/conservative look they're angling for as a mob step, but i'm sure if they weren't having to worry abt staying lowkey in civilian cover they'd love to dress up in more bright colours, jewel tones n such. as for now, most of that's reserved for when they're juno (pre-debut) and argos.

their cuckoo training's given them an aversion to opera and ballet, given those featured heavily in the functions they were meant to infiltrate as a cuckoo, sometimes as a dancer themselves. but! musicals and plays, for sure. The COSTUMES. THE EMOTIONS. tia elena probably invites sura to come with her one time and they're hooked (i want to believe wicked's in the fh verse, they'd be all over that. misunderstood outcast tarred as a villain? YEAH. post-hb it'd have even more resonance; no good deed is SO fitting cos of past-self rivalry. defying gravity, too.) then there's 70s-80s rock, esp queen (ofc the lead singer is the purrcury's namesake), sharing the same taste in music as pelayo and joes lol.

they're a classics/shakespeare nerd too, (hence why sura's puppet was named juno), and they'd especially enjoy viola's genderfuckery in twelfth night (and honestly, the mental image of argos going "it's SHAKESPEARE you HEATHEN" after quoting something from one of the tragedies at a clueless hero is too funny to pass up. they're just bringing some class to the villain scene.)

they like movies, though they do find it a little less engaging w/o the minds to read. a good few hollywood golden age, but animated ones are probably their favourite thanks to themmy. they binged a bunch of cartoon movies together, and lilo and stitch is their favourite cos of the BIG relate to lilo being a weird autistic girl and stitch being an escaped experiment that was made to be evil, but learned to love,,,,,

favorite person: pre-hb, it was a tie between ortega, tia elena (she nicknamed sura pollito, and she's the Only person sura will allow to call them that) and, as expected, themmy, in no small part due to the fact they all kept feeding sura. and he kept coming back like a stray cat lol. they made sura feel safe and loved and valued, and not just a little kid. themmy (in my hc) being openly autistic especially helped sura be less insecure about how young he came off, especially when the farmhands infantilised the regenes so much (and by extension, learning to mask and suppress his autistic traits). part of hiding his face (and lowering his voice) was so people would take him seriously, cos he was well aware how babyish he looked. it was a huge relief not to do that anymore, or at least do it less.

themmy: so what did you think?

t:

t: are you crying?

sura, sniffling and very obviously holding back tears: no

throughout rebirth, it was just mortum, largely cos they felt like the friendships they had as sidestep, being able to relax in someone else's company, this time, in juno's body. they love nerding out with her on tech stuff, critiquing peoples' suits, and just generally having someone that Gets It about just sitting in silence hanging out (mortum reads as neurodivergent to me).

it's a tie between her and chen now, to the surprise of both sura and chen, given how much friction they used to have lol. turns out that they have a lot in common (better at bonding with animals instead of people), more so than before hb, of course. (i am also pushing my autistic chen agenda, and that was part of the friction between the two was that step was trained to understand allistic inclined people. chen operates on different rules. but also given chens scepticism about the suspiciously well-trained young vigilante thing, i'll give him a pass for that too.)

rat king opinions: SURA ADORES THE GIRLS. sorta filling the void fred did, but not quite. i like to think of them as like… a telepathic equivalent of a service dog. if sura wasn't a mob step, they'd be a lot more dependent on them for interaction, but as is, they're a reliable supportive presence that sura knows will always have its back. it's nice to have another telepath to communicate with! routinely gives them mental scritches and treats for being the best telepathic rat brains in the whole world. they deserve it!!(and an added bonus, that also involves some self-care for herself. can't disappoint/let them down. it's a win/win.)

[nnnneeev]

Honest to god, same. Solomon is in my head 24/7, it's a problem that I'm not willing or wanting to fix 😂

I just wanted to share some of my favorite thoughts of him, if that's alright...

-Him making and bringing you coffee/tea while you're still up and working on something at 3 am while he sits with you doing his own thing.

-Outrageously long movie/tv show marathons with him and quoting iconic lines and scenes, specifically Lord of the Rings (cause i'm a nerd and i feel like he would like it too) but other long series work too.

-Going to watch plays with him - there was this play that I went to a few years ago and it was a Shakespeare mashup of a few of his plays and it was sooo funny! It was a very non-serious play, and I like to think Solomon would've enjoyed it. (sorry for rambling on this one)

-It doesn't matter the occasion, there doesn't even need to be an occasion, but finding and giving each other stupid/funny cards with something silly written on the inside.

-When shopping, the two of you heading straight to the candle section and spending an absurd amount of time there rating the different smells and such.

-Doing tarot readings for each other, also guessing each other's astrology placements (if you're into that lol).

Anyways, that's just a few that I can think of, I'm literally so in love with him 😩 Maybe I'll expand on these one day, once my writer's block leaves me alone haha... (sorry for rambling again)

*slams table* YES TO ALL OF THESE

I think i read somewhere before that working alongside mc is a dream come true for him. There's just the comfortable silence between you and both keeping each other company while doing your own business.

I do see him liking plays and long movie marathons!! Imagine the confusion of the people around you when you quote references from those movies, or trying to re-enact scenes from the play at the most random moments (like getting a glass of water but he's giving it to you in the most dramatic way). Both of you find amusement in the puzzled face they're making as you get absorbed in your own personal little world where no one else but you understand each other.

I remember giving wedding or birthday cards to my bestfriend even tho it's not her birthday (we were like 13 at that time) lol anyways there's like an unofficial competition between you where whoever has the silliest card wins (he has the leading score)

As a scented candle enthusiast this is a hard yes. He'll light one whenever you have reading sessions or just when the mood strikes him. I don't know much about tarot but i really wanna learn how to read it.

Rambles, thoughts, brainrots, etc. are always welcome in my blog! No need to feel sorry, i'm always happy to hear them!! 😊

[firstprince-ao3feed]

With so much of my heart (that none is left to protest)

With so much of my heart (that none is left to protest) https://ift.tt/yfUpZIT by kiwiana Alex is a former child star struggling to make the transition into being seen as a serious actor. He jumps at an opportunity to perform on stage in the UK, seeing it as a way to break free from the typecasting and show what he can really do. But he wasn’t prepared to star alongside someone he hates. // Henry is a recent theatre graduate who accepts an amazing role in a queer reimagining of Much Ado About Nothing. And then it turns out his co-star is none other than the man he’s been hopelessly pining after for years—even though Henry made a terrible first impression when they met. // It’s… well, it’s practically Shakespearean. Words: 4645, Chapters: 1/17, Language: English Fandoms: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Alex Claremont-Diaz, Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, Rafael Luna, June Claremont-Diaz, Nora Holleran, Percy "Pez" Okonjo, Beatrice Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, David the Beagle (Red White & Royal Blue), Zahra Bankston Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor, Minor or Background Relationship(s) Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Actors, Enemies to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Bisexual Disaster Alex Claremont-Diaz, Canon Dialogue, like an embarrassing amount of it actually but whatever, and I am including Much Ado dialogue in that as well as RWRB, Much Ado About Nothing, Much Ado About Nothing References, Inspired by Shakespeare, References to Shakespeare, in which the author nerds out about Shakespeare and queerness and also drops a James Bond deep cut, Slow Burn, not the relationship so much but the writing definitely, once they actually get together it’s kind of a relationship speedrun if we’re being honest, but we take a while to work up to the rating sorry, let Rafael Luna be the queer mentor Alex deserves, Epistolary, so much epistolary nonsense scattered throughout, Smut, Grief/Mourning, not at the same time lol, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, First Time Blow Jobs, First Time Bottoming, Semi-Public Sex, Homophobia, Racism, Communication Failure, POV Alternating via AO3 works tagged 'Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor' https://ift.tt/CgU4Tno August 07, 2023 at 04:00AM

[turnupswritessometimes]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Thanks....

I've taken my time with this one, beause it's quite a big question, lol

I'm someone who moves on pretty quickly when it comes to interests, and nowadays I don't even watch/read stuff more than once. But here's the list (not in any specific order):

1.) Stitch from Lilo and Stitch

Lilo and Stitch was one of the first films I ever saw in cinemas as a kid, and it still makes me sob to this day. Just! Stitch! In the woods! With the Ugly Duckling book! And he repeats it and looks around because he's got no family!

There's so much love and thought put into how he moves (see gif - the head tilt - the eyes! He's baby!) that shows his thought process and emotions. His arc is complimentary to Lilo's and it's my favourite film. Plus, he's cute and fluffy!

2.) Myka Bering from Warehouse 13

This space was a toss up between Claudia and Myka from this show. As an 11-13 year old watching this show for the first time, I had the biggest crush on Claudia, but I loved Myka too. And rewatching it now, I love her more.

Warehouse 13 revolves around a bunch of agents tracking down 'artefacts': objects that usually kill people in horrific ways, but sometimes have benefits. (A great episode is Shakespeare's lost folio: touching a page with doom you to die the death of the character depicted, unless you can say that character's final lines.) Myka's come from the secret service and is the more pragmatic one compared to partner Pete's comic relief and pop culture references. (I love Pete too, though!) Myka's also a nerd! A classics nerd! (Middle name Ophelia!) She loves H.G Wells (me too!) - and H.G Wells is in this show (see gif) as a very cool woman who Myka's more than a little in love with. (Me too! Sadly it's all subtext because this shows 10 years old now.) She's capable and cool but has a softer, human side that's allowed to come to light as much as her partner's. They take turns being vulnerable with each other and it's what makes these characters feel real.

She also has the line: "some girls play with barbies, others take fencing lessons." which! come on! It's so good!

3.) Baron from The Cat Returns

He's voiced by Cary Elwes (Westley from the Princess Bride), which makes him instantly cool! And, honestly, he's basically Westley; he's suave, sneaks into places with disguises, and is a master of swordplay. (Maybe I just like characters with swords?)

The Cat Returns is my favourite Studio Ghibli movie, because it's so similar to the Nutcracker, which is a favourite of mine too. The ball scene still makes me feel like a teen with a crush; there's a romanticism to it all that comes from how suave Baron is. His minature world is charming too!

4.) Nancy Thompson from Nightmare on Elm Street

Nancy's my favourite final girl. There's a great interview were they talk about how determined she is; she will find the truth, and she won't stop hunting for it. She takes active measures to ensure she can investigate and wake up in time. I don't have many points on this one: I just think she's neat!

5.) Sora from Kingdom Hearts

Again, I'm torn between two characters from the franchise - Sora and Roxas. But I played Kingdom Hearts 2 first, and that has more of Sora!

The whole series has a lot of nostalgia for me, and Sora's the heart of that. He's the player's world into exploring all these Disney worlds. I actually love the twist that Sora's not really meant to have a keyblade at all; Riku's the one who was meant to be. It's a cool reverse chosen one. Recently, it's more interesting to see how Sora's relentless optimism is being chipped away at. He feels like a very generic protagonist who's being subverted in a very clever way.

6.) Peter Pan, in like, a vague sense

No particular version of Peter, because I'll devour any Peter Pan retelling. A straight, fun disney version is heart-warming and escapist; Syfy's Neverland was like a magical Oliver Twist, with all the emotional beats; darker ones explore the strange, darker (unintentional) subtext of the novel. (Which I do love; it's just so memorable.) All of the Peters, please!

(I vividly remember seeing a Peter Pan panto and Peter was played by a young woman and oh boy! Finding out girls can play boys was a big moment for me!)

7.) Cinderella...from Cinderella

I could easily do top 10 Disney characters, but this is the last one for this list. And again, it's more about what Cindie represents. She keeps her kindness and her empathy throughout her story; she works hard and makes sacrifices and that earns her happily ever after. I think that manta of 'Have Courage and be Kind' in the live action one is a great phrase to live by, and easily applied to real life. I've worked two jobs throughout my masters, so the idea of hard work being rewarded someday is comforting. I hope it's true, lol.

8.) Tails from Sonic

He's just real neat! A good little guy! He can fly and he's super smart! I always mained him on Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Games, and I've liked him since I was a kid. (I really struggled to fill this space, so runners up were Zuko, Nico Di Angelo, Vanitas and Link.)

9/10.) Ash Lynx and Eiji Okumura from Banana Fish

I can't separate the boys! They go together!

Honestly, this shouldn't be a surprise, lol. Oddly, though, it's hard to answer a question of why they're so dear to me. Ash is a very interesting character to unpack; and unpacking those darker elements of his story is? Intriguing? I think is the best word for it. That depth comes across in the manga and is probably what made it endure.

Eiji has a similar depth that I feel like gets washed away a bit, by the fandom. He's 'normal,' but he's not, really. He's exceptionally compassionate, and just as impulsive as Ash. (He is all in within meeting this boy for ten minutes.)

And it's their implied relationship in the series that is just! So! Much! The trust and care and the fact that they do act like two teenage boys messing around with each other. (Which is something I don't think either of them got to have.)

Honestly, I've been writing the both of them for so long that they do feel like a part of me, now, even though they're not my characters.

And that's ten! Thanks so so much for the ask! I love getting to waffle nonsense to a captive audience! Sorry it took so long to answer! <3 xxx

[misc-magic]

Quick! Top three favorite characters of all time!

Of all time?!?!

I was like oh well if we're talking Obey Me, the answer is easy, but of all time??

I haven't thought about that before lol. I suspect my opinion changes depending on what I'm into in the moment. I've been into a LOT of stuff and I've read a TON of books and trying to narrow it all down to three is gonna be really hard!

If I say okay, here are the characters who are my faves right now, they'd all be OM characters lol. Barbatos, Solomon, and Mammon are my top three and that's easy.

But I kinda think Barbatos would have to make it onto the top three of all time list. Because I don't think I've ever been quite as obsessed with a character as I have been with him. Er, well, at least a character that wasn't my own creation lol. And I prefer the version of Barb that exists in my head because the game always fails to truly explore the characters the way they deserve.

But if Barbatos doesn't count because he's like... the current hyperfixation, then I think these would be the first three I'd list.

The next character that comes to mind right away is Legolas from Lord of the Rings because I also had an unhealthy obsession with him. Though people might be like, oh that's only because he was pretty, I'm like excuse you have you read the books? Legolas was delightful, he was always singing and just... being an elf, you know? And he built a freakin' boat. And fell in love with a dwarf. I loved book Legolas first. But I won't pretend movie Legolas being pretty didn't help the obsession.

Sailor Uranus is next. I watched Sailor Moon first as an adult rather than as a kid. I don't know how I missed it back in the 90s when it was airing, but somehow that happened. But I kept seeing the characters and being like, I need to experience this. So I watched the whole 90s anime and then the remake because it was all on Hulu at the time. And as soon as Haruka showed up, it was love at first sight. I love all the characters, of course, but Sailor Uranus really left an impression on me.

I kinda think I have to list Puck from A Midsummer Night's Dream as the last one. Wow that makes me sound like such a nerd, huh? At least it wasn't Hamlet. But lil middle schooler me was super into Shakespeare and I read A Midsummer Night's Dream many times because I wanted to be Puck lol.

However, I feel like this is subject to change at any time and I love A LOT of characters, so it is REALLY HARD to narrow it down to only three lol. It's a lot easier to say my top three of like... a specific thing. Like I was obsessed with Supernatural, too, but none of those characters even made the list. I also went through a Harry Potter phase and none of those characters made the list either.

Anyway, sorry if this is a whole book, but that's kinda how I do everything lol!

[nicolasnelson]

Hosie & Sizzie fic - Tabula Rasa

Title: Tabula Rasa Relationships: Hope/Josie, Sebastian/Lizzie, MG/Kaleb Additional Tags: Memory Magic, Inspired by Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Humor, Misunderstandings, Kissing, First Kiss, Getting Together, Monster Hunters Chapters: 1/3 Words: 3,631

Summary: Hope does a memory spell to make everyone forget her again. Problem is, they forget who they are and that magic exists. Meanwhile monsters from Malivore are closing in. Chaos ensues.

[AO3 LINK]

Read Chapter 1 below the cut:

Hope felt more alone than ever. All her friends remembered her now, but they were angry she’d kept her return a secret. No one bothered to ask her why she’d done it. Landon hadn’t even said a word to her, and Rafael had said they couldn’t talk anymore.

Everyone was leaving her. At least she’d be going back to Malivore soon. She could finally end this, and with luck, everyone would forget her again. But Hope wasn’t sure she could wait that long. The past few days had been unbearable. She felt nothing but pain and a loneliness that rendered her useless.

A knock sounded at her door. Hope didn’t have the energy to get up and answer it. She wrapped her blanket tightly around herself and returned her attention back to the show she was mindlessly watching. Anything to fill the void.

“Hope, please open up.” Josie’s voice.

That was the last person she wanted to see right now. She hadn’t spoken to her since she’d cast the spell to return everyone’s Malivore memories. Hope was too angry to see her. This was all Josie’s fault. If she’d just let sleeping dogs lie, Hope could have told everyone in her own time. They could have found another way to destroy the Croatoan.

“Please, Hope. This is an emergency. There’s a hoard of Malivore monsters heading for the school. We need you to help fight them off, to help protect Landon.”

Hope’s heart stuttered at the sound of his name. “Landon doesn’t want to see me.”

A blast sounded behind her. Hope whirled around to see the door had burst off its hinges. She glared at Josie. “What the hell was that for?”

“I wanted to make sure you were definitely in here before I forced my way in.”

“How did you find me?”

Josie held up a map with a splotch of blood on it. A simple location spell.

Hope sighed. She should have done more to mask her location. She was just so sure no one wanted to see her right now that she hadn’t bothered. Hope swiped at her tears, letting her messy hair fall across her face. She didn’t want Josie of all people to see her like this.

“Are you going to come and fight or what?”

“No one wants me there,” Hope said, hugging her legs and resting her chin on her knees.

“My dad does. And Lizzie too. I haven’t spoken to the others, but they all know you’re the best chance we have at fighting Malivore’s monsters. We’re all gathering in the library right now to prepare to defend the school. We voted and we want you to lead the fight. Come on, Hope, people do want you there.”

“Who voted against me?” Hope asked, raising her chin. Though she already knew the answer.

“Landon and Raf. Oh, and that new vampire. Or old vampire. Sebastian.”

Hope raised an eyebrow. “Ah, the one who saved us from the Croatoan. I’ve yet to meet him, but he sounds terrible already.”

“Come on, Hope. You know you’ll never forgive yourself if the monsters get Landon and you weren’t there to save him.”

Hope let out a long sigh. As much as she didn’t want to care anymore, she knew she still cared far too much. “Okay, fine. Let me just get my stuff together.”

She went into her room and gathered her weapons into a duffel bag. She glanced over her shoulder and listened carefully to make sure Josie wasn’t right outside the door. The creak of the couch sounded as the voices on the TV droned on.

Hope pulled out the spell book she’d been poring over last night and gathered the ingredients to a particularly useful spell. She struck a match and lit the bundle of sticks.

“For those who remember what Malivore obscured, this I char,” she chanted. “Let Lethe’s Bramble do its chore. Purge their minds of memories grim of pains from recent slights and sins. When the fire goes out, when the crystal turns black, the spell will be cast. Tabula rasa. Tabula rasa. Tabula rasa.”

— 

When they arrived at the Salvatore School library, Hope set down her weapon bag on an armchair and surveyed the group. Alaric was poring over books at a table in the middle of the room. Landon and Rafael stood nearby discussing different tactics superheroes in comics used to fight large groups of monsters.

A broody fellow was standing in a corner tracing his finger along the book titles. Lizzie walked over to him and handed him an old-fashioned outfit on a hanger.

“Seriously, Sebastian, you haven’t washed that outfit in six hundred years. People have been complaining.”

“Is it really so important that I smell nice going into battle?” Sebastian asked, his voice lofty and lilting. She couldn’t place his accent, but it sounded vaguely British. Not what Hope would have expected.

“It is if I’m fighting with you.” Lizzie pushed the clothes into his arms and held her nose.

Sebastian flitted out of there at vamp speed and returned a moment later dressed in the new clothes. He even looked like he had showered.

Hope turned her head to the side, sniffing herself cautiously. She’d put on deodorant, but she hadn’t taken the time for a shower. Hopefully she didn’t smell too bad.

“Much better,” Lizzie declared, practically fawning over him.

MG and Kaleb were standing by one of the display cases. They’d lifted the glass, and Kaleb was showing off a ring Hope recognized.

“Hey, that’s my father’s,” Hope said. “Be careful.”

“Chill, girl. I’m just trying it on. Gosh, this is so dope.” He admired the thick golden band.

“Oh, look, there’s another,” MG said. He snatched a gold ring from the case and slid it onto his finger. Hope was about to tell him that was her step-father’s but decided it wasn’t worth the trouble. She just needed to make sure they put them back before they headed in battle.

“What do you think, Lizzie?” MG asked, holding up his hand.

She rolled her eyes. “It looks stupid. Now can we get on with the monster fighting? What’s the plan, Hope?”

All eyes turned to Hope. She glanced at the crystal in her pocket. It was almost completely black. Good. She just needed to stall a little longer. “What do we know so far?” she asked Alaric, who was sitting at a table with a book in front of him, clearly in the middle of some research.

“We don’t know much about the monsters. Only that Malivore can now send more than one at once. The zombie from last time is among them, but I expect there might be vampires as well. All with the mark of Malivore carved into their foreheads.”

“Do we have any idea of their numbers?” Hope asked. “I was thinking we could scout—” The world swayed as lights danced before Hope’s eyes. She was vaguely aware of Rafael running towards her as she passed out.

A moment later the rest of them passed out too.

—

A group of nine strangers awoke in a room filled with bookshelves. They all looked around at each other, confused.

One girl awoke in the muscled arms of a handsome black guy. She tucked a strand of long brown hair behind her ear and backed away from him. She didn’t know who he was, or who anyone was, or even who she herself was.

“Hey, there.” The guy smiled at her, giving her an appreciative look. Did he know her? Was this some strange case of amnesia? Oh, God. She needed to get to a hospital right away.

“What is this place?” came a surly British accent.

She looked across the room at a guy dressed in a ruffled shirt, dark blue coat, and black trousers tucked into boots. He looked like he’d been transported through time. Or maybe she had been transported back through time. But no, most of the others were wearing clothes like hers.

“Does anyone remember anything?” the blond girl next to the British guy asked.

“No,” everyone said at once.

“Maybe we’re all just really drunk,” said a black guy with braids.

“I don’t see any drinks, and my breath doesn’t smell like alcohol. Also I don’t think drinking would make us forget who we are,” the blonde said.

A boy with curly dark hair dug a card out of his pocket and held it up triumphantly. “I found my student ID. It seems my name is Landon. I go to Salvatore Boarding School for the Young and Gifted. Oh, wow. I’m gifted. I must be really smart.”

“Oh, I go there too,” said the black guy with braids. “Maybe we’re friends. I’m Kaleb.” He gave Landon a fist bump.

“What’s your name?” Kaleb asked the guy standing next to him.

“Milton,” he said, making a face. “Gosh, why couldn’t I have a cool name like Kaleb or Landon?”

“I’m Hope Marshall.” Hope stood up and brushed off the dust from her pants. She was relieved to have a name now, even though she still had no idea about anything else.

“Oh, hey, you got a last name. No fair,” Landon said. He rushed over to look at her ID card. “You go to a different school.”

“Mystic Falls High School,” she said, nodding. Guess she wasn’t as smart as the others...

“I’m Rafael,” said the guy she’d woken up on top of. “I go to Salvatore too.” He looked at Hope. “Hey, do you think we’re dating? We woke up all huddled together like that.”

“I guess we must be,” Hope said. There was something incredibly familiar about him, and her heart was doing little somersaults in her chest.

“Looks like we’re in the library of Salvatore Boarding School.” Landon pointed to a picture on the wall. “Most of us are students, I’d guess, but who are you?” Landon asked the older guy sitting at the table.

The guy dug through his wallet and pulled out a driver’s license. “Alaric Saltzman.” He looked at the books in front of him on the table. “I’m quite a bit older than you all. I must be a teacher, or maybe I’m the librarian. I do seem to know my way around the books.”

“I know this sounds kind of crazy, but we look kind of alike, and I feel like I need to get your approval. Do you think you’re my father?” Landon asked.

Alaric studied him. “You know. I do feel very disappointed in you and like I need to protect you. You probably are my son.”

“So I’m Landon Saltzman,” Landon said proudly. “That’s right, Hope Marshall. Last name buddies!” He gave her a high five.

“Not that anyone cares but I’m Elizabeth,” said the blonde.

“That is a beautiful name,” said the broody British guy. “Unfortunately, I have not been able to locate any identification on my person.”

Elizabeth reached over to check the tag of his coat. “Oh, look, your name is Lysander.”

Lysander scoffed, running a hand through his dark hair. “My mother must have hated me. I cannot believe she had the audacity to label my clothes and name me Lysander. What kind of name is that? Lysander. It sounds like a plague.”

“At least it’s better than Josette,” said a girl with wavy brown hair.

“That’s not so bad,” said Elizabeth. “We can call you Jojo for short.”

She made a face. “God, that’s even worse.”

“What about Josie?” Hope said.

“Ugh.” Elizabeth made a puking face.

“No, I like that. Josie it is.” Josie gave Hope a shy smile.

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “Whatever. We need to get to a hospital and figure out what’s going on.”

“Wait,” Landon said, jumping in front of her. “What if we’re just being punked? You guys could all be pretending, and I’m the only one who doesn’t remember.”

“None of us are pretending, you turnip,” Lysander grumbled.

“Maybe we’ve all been drugged,” Milton suggested. “That could explain why we don’t remember anything, right? Or we got hit on the head.”

“My head feels fine,” Kaleb said.

Josie walked over to them. “Oh, hey, you guys have matching rings. Are you two together?”

Milton and Kaleb looked at each other. “Maybe,” Milton said. “I feel like he would be my type. Strong-willed, handsome, clever.”

Kaleb grinned. “Aw, you’re making me blush. I don’t think I’d go for such a nerd, but there’s something really endearing about you.”

“Your ring,” Josie said, picking up Kaleb’s hand. “It has an M on it. M for Milton. And yours has a K for Kaleb. Guys, these look like wedding rings. I think you’re married.”

“Oh, nice.” Kaleb put his arm around Milton, smiling.

It was Milton’s turn to blush.

“Aw, you guys are so cute.” Josie looked around, wishing she had her own partner. A number of these people were good-looking, but the only one that really captivated her was the girl who was already dating someone. Hope, was it?

“Okay, everyone, let’s get out of here,” Elizabeth said, marching to the door.

“Who made you the boss?” Hope demanded.

“You guys are just sitting around, so I’m taking charge.” Elizabeth opened up the door.

Three men in horribly gruesome Halloween costumes growled at her. They had some weird symbol on their forehead, along with a ton of fake blood. They smelled horrible. Elizabeth slammed the door in their faces and backed up.

“It’s Halloween, isn’t it?” Elizabeth said, trying her best not to freak out. “Those were just costumes, right?”

“No, that smelled like real blood,” Lysander said, somehow certain of it, though he couldn’t explain why.

“How would you know?” Elizabeth asked, suspicious. “Are you a doctor, or something? Maybe you’re the one who trapped us here.” She crossed her arms.

“I assure you I did nothing of the sort.”

A crash sounded and the door flew open. They all screamed and backed away. Elizabeth picked up a sword from one of the glass cases and swung it at the approaching zombie. She kicked it backwards into the other one.

Lysander joined her, swinging a heavy book onto the monsters’ heads with surprising accuracy.

“I’m really good at this,” Elizabeth said, relishing the fact. “I must be a monster hunter. We make a good team, Lysander.”

“There’s a secret door in the wall over here,” Hope called. “It looks like it leads down somewhere.”

“I’ll check,” Rafael said. He ran down the stairs. A moment later he came back. “It looks like some sewers or tunnels. Definitely a way out.”

“Good. You guys use that to escape,” Elizabeth said, swinging at the zombie. “Lysander and I will hold off the monsters.”

“Oh, hold up. You’re not fighting them alone,” Kaleb said. “I’m going to help too.”

“Me too,” said MG.

“Look, here’s a whole bag of weapons,” Landon said. He passed them out to everyone.

“Okay, we split up,” Elizabeth said. “The rest of you go down the stairs and find a way out. We’ll hold them off as long as we can.”

The others hurried to obey, eager to be out of that room.

Elizabeth grabbed Lysander’s arm to get him out of the way of an attacking monster. She pushed the monster back with her other hand and the monster went flying backwards in a shower of sparks.

“Whoa,” she said. “Did you see that, guys? I have powers. I’m like a superhero or something.”

“No wonder you’re the boss,” Lysander said, laughing. He was looking at her in awe, clearly impressed.

“Hey, when you guys are done flirting, we could use some help over here,” Kaleb said. He was struggling to put an arrow in a crossbow.

Elizabeth marched over there and snatched it from him. As if by instinct, she placed the arrow in it and shot the zombie approaching them. “Why don’t you guys catch up with the others in the tunnels? Lysander and I have got this.”

“We can still help,” Kaleb insisted. “You can do magic, right? I found this book of magic on the table. Maybe I can find a spell you can use to stop the monsters.”

Milton grabbed Kaleb’s hand. “Come on, babe. They’ve got this.”

Kaleb looked disappointed. “There’s got to be something in the book. Come on, it’s worth a shot.”

Elizabeth huffed. “Fine, you two work on that. Lysander and I will draw them outside.”

It was easy enough to herd the monsters outside. There were twelve of them in total. This was going to be a long fight. Elizabeth glanced over at Lysander. He was strong, but he hadn’t displayed any magic skills.

One of the monsters opened its jaws displaying sharp, pointy teeth. “Oh, God, a vampire.” Elizabeth ran it through with a sword, but it didn’t slow it down even a little. She tried to knock it back with magic, but nothing happened when she thrust her hands forward.

Lysander suddenly appeared behind the vampire and snapped its neck. When he looked up at Elizabeth, dark veins spread under his eyes and long fangs protruded from his mouth.

Elizabeth yelped and stepped away, holding the sword between them. “Don’t come any closer.”

“What’s the matter, Elizabeth?”

She turned and ran.

“Elizabeth, would you slow down?”

—

Hope led the way through the underground tunnels. It was poorly lit with electric bulbs along the walls at intervals. Rats skittered across the damp floor, and a rank smell filled the place. Like old blood.

“Everyone okay?” Hope asked, glancing back at the others.

“So far,” Landon said, rubbing something sticky off his jacket. “I think I stepped into a spider web.”

Alaric placed a hand on his shoulder. “You should be more careful.”

“Sorry, Dad. It’s just really hard to see down here.”

“Post tenebras spero lucem,” Hope muttered. An orb of light burst forth in her hand. Everyone jumped, startled. “Okay, I have no idea where that came from.”

“You have magic,” Josie said, looking fascinated. “That is so cool.” She reached over to link arms with Hope. “I’m sticking with you from now on.”

Hope laughed. “Oh, it’s not that cool. Okay, it’s pretty cool. I wonder what else I can do.”

Landon was muttering the words Hope had spoken over and over again. “Dang it. I don’t have any magic.”

“Me neither,” Alaric said. “Looks like we’re both regular humans, son.”

“Yeah, I can’t do anything either,” Rafael said, shrugging. “Looks like Hope’s the only one.”

Josie said the spell, not expecting anything to happen. Light burst forth in her hand. “Oh, I can do it too,” she said excitedly.

“That’s great,” Hope said, smiling. “Maybe we were in like a coven together or something.”

“Yeah, we’re probably magic buddies.”

“Do you think we knew magic existed?” Landon asked. “Or are we not supposed to know? If it’s some big secret, then we should be pretty excited about this, right? I mean, it’s okay for me to be geeking out a little right now.”

“The book I was reading when I woke up was a magic book,” Alaric said. “I think I must have known about it, or at least suspected.”

Rafael wrapped an arm around Hope, pulling her away from Josie. “Well, I’m pretty sure I knew since I’m dating this goddess.”

Hope felt a little weird. She was pretty sure she liked him. Her heart was racing and her skin felt electric at his touch, but she couldn’t help glancing at Josie…

—

“Elizabeth, would you stop running for one moment?” Lysander grabbed her arm. He felt a pinch of pain and then he was flying backwards. He rubbed his head. “What was that for?”

“You’re a vampire!” Elizabeth yelled. She didn’t know why her magic only seemed to work when she was touching him, but that was hardly her concern at the moment.

“What? I am not a vampire,” he said, offended. “I am one of the good guys. I have been fighting by your side all this time, haven’t I?”

“Check your teeth.”

Lysander felt his canines. They were long and sharp. He sniffed the air and found he could smell blood. Goodness gracious, the girl was right. This did not make any sense to him.

“I hunt monsters like you,” Elizabeth said.

“And I feed on people like you.” He stepped closer to her, but she didn’t back away this time. Her chin was held high, and damn was that attractive. “So why don’t I feel the slightest urge to bite you? Instead I find myself drawn to you in a way I cannot explain. And why am I fighting against other monsters?”

“Maybe you’re not as powerful, and they pick on you for that.”

“No, that isn’t it,” he said with certainty. He knew he could hold his own in a fight. “I must be a noble vampire, far more intelligent than any of the monsters that give in to their thirst. I doubt I have had a drop of human blood in my life. I only feed on animals and hunt the villains who prey on humans.”

Elizabeth rolled her eyes, scoffing. “A good vampire? That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Yeah, well, maybe you have forgotten that along with everything else. Maybe I should remind you.” Lysander was taking a risk here, but it felt right in his bones. He wrapped a hand around Elizabeth’s waist and pulled her into a deep kiss.

Elizabeth felt like her skin was on fire. She wanted to get closer to the vampire. She dug her fingers through his hair and kissed his mouth, careful not to brush against his fangs. He tilted his head so his lips brushed her neck, and she melted into his arms.

[ggukkiereads]

Fic Recs | Fake Dating AUs

This is based on asks for fake dating fics. Most of these favorites are reblogged with reviews. Others are still ongoing series I am reading whenever there is an update.

Members are organized per number of fake dating participation 😂

Jungkook

Mutual Help @personasintro​ - [39/?] | literally the only reason I visit Wattpad. | semi fake dating AU, Bestfriend AU, FWB AU, Slow Burn | F, S, A  

Aphrodite in War @jungblue​ - [2/?] | Exes AU, Fake Dating, Fratboy/Greek Life, Roommate AU, Enemies to Lovers  | F, S, A    (one of my favorite authors too! Like read all her fics)

Bitchin @kinktae​ - series [10/10 + 10 Years After] | fake dating, college au, jock!jk, smart!reader, E2L #holygrailfic (⭐)  

Blush @jhsbrat​ - JJK | one shot | friends to lovers, feat Jin (I remember looking everywhere for this because I thought the author deactivated 😭 so I was glad it got reposted)

The Proposal @hansolmates​ - JJK one shot | editor!jungkook x assistant, like the movie The Proposal

My Euphoria @moyochu​ - JJK | one shot | CEO!JK, Florist!OC, bought chocolate cosmos from her shop for his Mom and a plan ensues when OC needed a fake boyfriend (I reco’d this during one network’s JK’s week last year because I just adore how fluffy this fic is I binged on their fluffy catalog one time and I recommend their other works!)  

Proposals @pjxmin - JJK | one shot | pretend proposals to get free food from restaurants 🤭

Dating Plan @/jjkthclub - JJK | one shot | enemies to lovers, childhood friends, actually it’s more of a “Dating Trial” just so the moms will leave them alone (🥰)  

Piss Off Your Parents @littlemisskookie​ - JJK | one shot | Rich Kids who hate the pressure from their parents but JK is a rebel and OC roomed with him (and fake dated him) to piss off the parents (⭐)  

Love to Hate You @latetaektalk​ - JJK | series [4/?]  | fratboy! AU, fake dating! AU, college! AU, enemies to lovers! AU, rich kid! AU, angst, fluff 

Anpanman @honeymoonjin​ - JJK | one shot | fake date to get therapy (this is also hilarious?!?! like ridiculous premise but the author made it work. Anyway the link leads to my reblog and you can read my comments if you need convincing 🤭)  

Moonlight Melody + Part 2 @/gukyi  - JJK | two shot | 50k |  fake dating, orchestra AU (part of this fic rec list)

Coffee Shop Contract @/gukyi - JJK | one shot | 18k |  fake dating, college AU  

Better Late Than Never @rosaetae​ - JJK drabble, exes AU, fake dating (I love this scenario, there’s one funny moment here with Jungkook saying his feelings through a door) 

End Game @minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong - JJK | one shot | 12.1k | soccer player x cheerleader, fake dating AU, ex-Namjoon  

One Thing Right by hobios (now on AO3) - JJK | series [8/8] | more on fake marriage than fake dating but I’m throwing this in because this is my #holygrailfic  

Play Pretend @seokoloqy - JJK | one shot | 8.6k |  Athlete AU, Jock AU, Soccer Player!JK, Fake Dating AU, Friends to Lovers AU | S, A

The B.S.T. Mission @singguks - JJK | 11.2k | Secret Agents AU, Fake Dating AU | A, F, S ~ ongoing [3/?]

ILYSB @rkiverse - JJK | one shot | 11.1k | idol au, broken-hearted jungkook, love clinic staff reader, fake dating but not really (more of part of therapy) | F, A

It’s All Fun and Games @/cupofteaguk - JJK | one shot | slow burn, set up on blind date so they pretended to be dating to shut others up 🥰  

Collar Full @minloop​ - JJK | fluff, smut, friends to lovers, college au, ‘fake dating’ au for Jungkook's love project  

True Care @joonsgalaxy​ - JJK | series [7.5/?] | bodyguard!jungkook fake dating   

Baby I’m a Fool @suhdays​ - JJK | one shot | enemies to lovers, coworker  

Blank Check @pantaemonium​ and @sugaxjpg​ - JJK |  series [5/?] | fake dating AU, college AU, fratboy AU, fuckboy AU, jock!jk (been following this fic for years 🥰)

Beautiful Confession @btsracket​ - JJK | one shot | Friends to Lovers, OC just lost her job + boyfriend and only childhood friend to turn to

It Takes Two @junghelioseok​ - JJK | one shot | Christmas AU, fake dating, roommate au

From Home @gyukult​ - JJK | series [12/12] | rich kid!jk (but he was cut off and has to learn how to earn on his own), baker!reader, enemies to lovers, fake dating   

I Wished I missed My Ex @angelguk​ - JJK | one shot | College AU, Fake Dating

The Wedding Date @jjungkookislife​ - JJK | one shot | fake date for wedding  

💜 Jungkook is Over Party (#JungkookisOverParty) @extravaguk​ - series [4/?] | 11k+ | Fake Dating, College AU, Himbo!JK, Smart!Reader | F (so far)

→ Fics with parts/chapters of fake dating:

Cream and Sugar @gukslut -  series [6/6] | Smut, Humor, Escort AU, Barista AU, Enemies to Lovers, Asshole!Jungkook (this is also a gem! must read)  🥕

Midas @/gukyi - one shot | enemies to lovers, magical realism, CEO AU, OC has invisibility and JK turns stuff into gold . (okay just a segment where they pretended in front of the parents  

Fuckboy Jungkook Who Quotes Gatsby Part 5  Part 6   @btsinspirationtakesme - drabble series [6/6] | Fuckboy AU, Nerd!Reader, Enemies to Lovers, using literary quotes to win OC (Shakespeare, FS Fitzgerald, Neruda, etc) (so this is actually surprisingly cute?!?! I don’t even remember how I discovered this fic. Anyway there is one chapter where they fake date) 

Taehyung

Kismesis @jjkthclub​ - KTH | it’s pretend to be a couple during a wedding expo (for free food! like I would do the same lol)

The Holi-date @kpopfanfictrash​ - KTH | This neighbor!Taehyung is just...memorable you know? It’s a great romcom piece 🥰 

Love at First Oink @glodenclosetau - KTH | the only SMAU I’m putting here because this is a MUST READ. It has written parts and this is just the fluffiest cutest SMAU (also the first I’ve read in full because I have the tendency to read and miss on smau episodes before)  

Can’t Fake a Feeling @bubmyg​ - KTH, F2L, Fake Dating, College AU, Fuckboy  

Schemes and Tricks to Win Her Heart @crystaljins​ - KTH feat KSJ | series [5/5] | Fake Dating Chaebol/Rich Seokjin, Taehyung is Jin’s Little Brother, and OC is Tae’s bestfriend  (⭐) 

X and O @army-author​ KTH | fake dating, single parent, teacher AU 

False Pretense @v-hope​ - KTH | one shot | Fake Dating AU | F, slight A

La La Land by hoseokiehope (used to be on tumblr) - KTH | one shot | throwing this in because this is also a classic  

Crush Culture @chaangbin - KTH | fluff, angst, fake dating au, childhood friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, smut  

The Platinum Rule @taecalicook - KTH | two shot | you can read the JJK since this is a spin-off (but nor required), fuckboy!taehyung, fratboy  

Yoongi

Playing with Fire @houseofdemi-blog - MYG | series [8/8] |  Fake Dating AU, Rich Girl AU, Producer Yoongi, Bad Boy AU (this is a classic. a really great fic)  

First and Last Love @floralseokjin​ - MYG | Christmas AU, Exes who needed to pretend they’re still together because they haven’t told the family yet about the break up (this is 👌)  

When The Stars Align @itskimtaehyung​ - MYG | one shot | College AU, Roommates, cuffing season

The Heart Holiday @vanaera - MYG | series [3/5] | 92.3k | Office AU, Enemies to Lovers, Fake Dating AU  

Switching My Positions @cupofteaguk - MYG | solo artist!yoongi, manager!y/n, fake dating au, friends to lovers au 

Maybe So @joonary​ - MYG | two shot? [1/?] | fake date someone you already have feelings for (you have to read this - just so fluffy) 

Everglow @dreamyjoons - MYG | series [4/4] vague fake dating au, friends to lovers

Veil feat PJM @ddaenghoney​  - series [20/20] | slow burn, unrequited love, love triangle, fwb (pjm), producer!yoongi

Ink Nemesis @scriptaed​ - series [7/7] | fake dating, paparazzi!oc, idol

Seokjin

Better With You @ve1vetyoongi​​ - KSH | series [2/3] | help him inherit his trust-fund-baby-fortune  

Courtship Chronicles @/gukyi  - KSJ | one shot | friends to lovers, fake dating to show how fun dating could be  

Raspberry Truffles @gukyi​ - KSJ | one shot | F2L, fake dating

The Money Project @namjoonchronicles​ - KSJ | series [2/?] | fake marriage actually, they don’t like each other but Seokjin’s parents like her and he needs her to get on parents’ good graces  

Too Good To Be True @hueseok​ - KSJ | series [7/?] | college au, idiots to lovers, 10 things I Hate About You  

Taming of Bridezilla @cinnaminsvga​ - KSJ | one shot | fake date to least favorite cousin’s wedding

Jimin

Fake It Till It Works @glassbangtan​ - PJM | one shot | panicked and told Hoseok he has a GF and he’s looking for one who could pretend, Best Friend AU

Remedy for Mondays @dovechim​ - PJM | series [4/4] | Co-worker AU, Fake Pregnancy AU (lol), Fake Dating AU, fake baby daddy 😅 🥕

Happily Glazed @/bubmyg​ - PJM | one shot | fake date to cousin’s wedding, slice of life  

Call Me Baby @hueseok​ - PJM | one shot | friends to lovers, roommate au, college au

Namjoon

My Blood, Your Tears @nottojay​ - KNJ | series [5/?] | fake dated Namjoon who is the rival of her brother’s gang, Mafia AU (it’s incomplete though but good for bookmarking)

Until You Make It @versigny​ - KNJ | one shot | Christmas setting, co-workers   

My Only Wish @ppersonna - KNJ | one shot | Christmas AU, E2L, idiots to lovers  

Hoseok

Fakeation @theunknowncryptid​ - JHS | SMAU |  Inspired by the movie Just Go With It

Fake Love @aquaminwrites​ - JHS | Fake dating AU, enemies to lovers, fluff, smut, minor angst (you have to read all of the writer’s fics. her fics are just amazing. promoting her Taehyung fic Paper Cranes which is a favorite of mine too)  

*there is one Hoseok fic I really like but it was last updated in 2019 😥 so I didn’t include anymore but that’s such a great fic

There are new fake dating fics I’ve seen recently but I haven’t read them yet. Once I get to read them, I’ll update this with ones I’d like to recommend

🌷 posted: 2021 May 07 | updated: 2021 June 12 (indicated with a 💜)

🌷 other lists

🌷 I love to read so feel free to recommend a fic =)

[cupiiid]

neil and ginny hcs (ft todd and chris)

because i'm writing a chris x ginny fic at the moment, i've decided to write some neil and ginny friendship headcanons because i feel like they'd be cute friends (this might be a little bit too niche lol)

also!! these hcs take place after the play which mr perry never finds out about and neil is alive and well (he's still getting abused by his father but y'know, you can't win them all)

-they are THE chaotic theatre nerd friends

-they always take todd and chris on double dates

-they're always quoting shakespeare at each other

-sometimes ginny will sneak into welton on weekends to hang out with neil (sometimes chris will come with her and neil, todd, ginny and chris will just chill in the woods doing literally nothing but still have a great time)

-everyone thinks they're a couple and they usually play into it because it's the 50s and homophobia is a bitch

-they are the best fucking dancers. they tear up the dance floor from complex choreographed routines to the best damn waltz you've ever seen (chris and todd sometimes dance together as well but their eyes are always on their partners)

-the danburrys adore neil, whenever he comes over they always ask him how he's doing

-theyre probably the type of people to have shakespeare themed nicknames for everyone else to gossip about them is secret

-they fake date and when neil introduces ginny to his father, she almost punched him in the face

-when ginny brought neil over, he almost punched chet who was giving her shit

-in the future, neil and ginny go to award shows together while todd and chris chill at home with ice cream and watch it on tv cheering them on constantly while on the phone with at least one of the other poets

-they have one of those houses that connect at the basement so neil and todd live in one and chris and ginny in the other, when someone comes over, one person switches houses so it looks like two straight couples living next door

-they try to work together as much as they can, often taking plays as a duo and are infamous for it

-neil (+todd) has two cats called will and walt, ginny (+chris) has a golden retriever called michael

-ginny and neil conspired the name of their dog, chris hated the name but then todd (her partner in crime) started using michael for the dog too and she gave up, accepting her fate (ginny was very happy)

-✨chaotic baking ✨

-they has to kiss once for a play and they would always try to make each other break during rehearsal and it became a challenge of who could make who laugh first

-ginny won

(this has been in my drafts for so long lol)

[humanlighthouse]

I did not know you were specializing in Poe?!!?!

🌫💀🕯🫀🗡🧱🚪🍷🏰🪦🌫

*very irritated rn that my phone has no appropriate corvid emoji*

As an american i'm familiar with like, The Raven (i am a sucker for a rhyme scheme ok?) and his most well-known short stories, etc. so i am super-curious: pray tell, what is your favorite Poe fact and/or work?

it's coming up on the spooky season, so i for one would love some Poe stuffs to reblog in October

*thinking really hard about a liu sang/tell tale heart fusion* ... *also thinking about how dmbj has so many horror elements you could easily situate a poe story into the dmbj universe*

Hi honey 🥰 I sure am! I'm gonna try to keep my nerd rant to an acceptable length, but just know that you brought this upon yourself 🤭

So first: rhyme scheme: have you read The Bells? When you read the poem, you can literally hear the different types of bells ringing! My dude was very good at sounds. He wrote essays on rhythm in poetry, it wasn't my favorite part so I'm not as well versed in that but it sure shows in the rest of his writing!

> I should have prefaced this by saying that everything he wrote can be found online! Either on wikisource or on the amazing, the wonderful website eapoe.org that has ANYTHING you might look for about him!

Okay back to writing. My favorite is a toss-up between William Wilson (guy haunted by a physical manifestation of his conscience) and The Masque of the Red Death (also about a guy haunted by a physical manifestation of his failures hm i have a type yes 🤔) Both stories are short yet pack an impressive emotional gut punch, they're very visual, full of symbolism, and just so damn well written?? I am currently writing an article about Masque and the fact that it uses the symptoms of Ebola 130 years before the disease was found 😗 and how that choice of disease (instead of say, the black plague or cholera that he also uses elsewhere) has to do with said failure of the prince, Color Theory Red, etc etc with some Shakespeare refs thrown in for good measure. It's fun!

My general area of knowledge is about religion and spirituality in Poe, which I am.... basically the only one to study? (yay for lack of competition, big fish tiny puddle!!) At the end of his life (at...39, but that's another can of worms), he wrote a long long loooooong essay (for Poe, so like, 100 pages, but it's so DENSE and dull at times it feels like twice that at least - the ending is really good though!) about cosmogony, that is, the creation of the universe, how and more important WHY it came to be, called Eureka. I did my masters on it, and my doctoral thesis was about how it's kind of a ... crystallization of ideas he wrote about previously?

Fun fact, did you know that Poe wrote the first (Western) Sherlock Holmes? Murders in the Rue Morgue, The Mystery of Marie Roget and The Purloined Letter all have Auguste C. Dupin (his Sherlock) solve crime by sitting down and thinking lol and he was the first! He also makes a few asides about, well, life in general, and a few of these are copied verbatim in Eureka, for example. Poe has very unique ideas about cosmogony, and it's lucky he wasn't more successful in spreading them around or he would probably have ended up on a stake somewhere :) but there are So Good! I can rant more about those at a later date lol

So while Eureka itself isn't my favorite work, its impact (retroactive impact? can that be a thing? I once wrote about "the inverted echo" of it and my thesis advisor was like What lmao) on the rest of Poe's work IS my main area of nerdiness. But Poe is amazing!! Almost everything he wrote is amazing!! He was also bitchy and petty and so goddamn nerdy. Also probably ace!! and definitely bi lol I HAVE ARGUMENTS FOR THIS

Lastly, I have a Poe side-blog, which hasn't been updated in AGES but still exists! And where I put up a list of Poe recs :) here

But don't.... don't get me started about Poe/DMBJ crossovers? I have work to do! articles to write! I HAVE A FAMILY PLEASE-

That's it for now, shutting up :p Thanks for the ask!!!