#also lol literally i was just telling them to make a fucking decision and call the vet bc they emailed me asking if the surgery was still on

[queeranddepraved]

I got yelled at for a long time by my parents earlier today.

Where are the men old enough to be my Dad, to pretend like they care about me in my dms?

[tojilvrs]

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ FUCK MY EX! (AND HIS BOSS) ceo!toji fushiguro x fem reader (2.7k)

repost from my old blog!!!

⁂ warnings: MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DNI! toji’s not a bum, reader gets cheated on (not by toji), m receiving oral, pet names, degradation, rough sex, reader’s ex sees them at the end, unprotected sex, creampie, sex as a revenge ploy, some praise, foot on head during doggy (does this have a technical name lol?), also tagging foot fetish JUST IN CASE the last thing counts lol, toji coerces reader, use of the name ‘daddy’ ONCE, spanking, some aftercare, toji steals your panties (and your heart), reader has hair long enough to be pulled

⁂ a/n: this fic literally came out of nowhere i had no plans of writing until i saw twitter porn and a little lightbulb formed above my head. anywho this is not great i wrote and proofread it while i was sleepy so if there’s mistakes don’t tell me i will get embarrassed!!!! THE PACING MIGHT ALSO BE HORRID i was just trying to get my claws on some fictional wiener. k luv u alllll <3

You never thought you could get this low.

You also never thought you’d come home to find your now ex-boyfriend balls deep in his coworker he told you not to worry about.

Way past the stages of hurt and with no more tears left to spill, you found yourself angry. You were pissed at your ex for being unfaithful. Pissed at the woman for fucking around with a man she knew was not available. And pissed at yourself for not figuring it out sooner. Once you got over your sorrows and finally felt able to pull yourself together, you just wanted to rid your apartment of anything that reminded you of him.

That's how you found yourself across the table from that rat bastard's boss. A box full of his old shit perched in your lap and your nails tapping the side of the cardboard. Scanning the room of Mr. Fushiguro's luxurious office and finding yourself filling with rage all over again knowing that the last time you were here, you were helping him get promoted.

"Pleasure seeing you again," you watched as Mr. Fushiguro took a seat in his plush office chair, "though it appears you're here to play the part of 'scorned girlfriend' instead of ‘concerned girlfriend, hm?’ Word travels fast ‘round here.”

"Ex-girlfriend."

"Right," he clasped his hands together over his chest and kicked his feet up onto his desk, knocking over his name plate, “so what're you here for, scorned ex-girlfriend?"

"Just want to give his shit back. Passing it on to you so I won't have to see him and blondie going at it in your breakroom." You watched the man crack a smile before speaking again.

"S'all you’re gonna do?" He knew your answer by the way you tore your eyes off of him and focused them on the box in your lap instead. Slightly slumping down in your chair as if you were a child in trouble trying to evade the scrutinizing gaze of a parent “Oh, don’t tell me you’re just gonna let bygones be bygones and let him get away with it scott free.”

His tone made you feel like your entire situation was almost comical. You looked back up and narrowed your eyes at the man. Scanning his face and watching the scar on his lip twitch when the corner turned up in a smirk.

“Mr. Fushiguro-“

“Don’t have to be all formal now, call me Toji.”

“Okay, what exactly are you implying, Toji?” he sighed before standing up from his desk and fixing his name plate, smirk never falling from his lips and eyes never leaving yours.

“I know he is my employee, but i’m not really… fond of him either. And you’re too pretty of a girl to just let him get away with cheating. It’d make you feel better to hurt ‘em a little bit. Get a little revenge.”

You broke away eye contact from him again to look around his office. Taking note of how sparsely decorated the area was as you pondered and tried to avoid his eyes. It wasn’t the most mature or logical decision, but he was right. It would make you feel better to make him hurt just a little bit. “And how exactly might I go about that?”

Toji laughed a little as he walked around the desk, taking the box out of your lap and placing it on the floor before settling himself behind you. The sweet tobacco scent of his cologne invaded your nostrils as he got closer to you, making his presence feel almost suffocating.

“Y’know what would really get him?” His voice sounded as if it were laced with a honeyed sweetness. The sound surrounding you and ringing around in your ears. He shifted his feet, but you still felt the heat radiating off of him and onto your back.

“What?”You felt him grow closer. Leaning down behind you. So close that you could feel his breath fan against your skin.

“Fuckin’ his boss.”

The lewd suggestion tickled the shell of your ear. Your eyes widening and mouth going dry once you realized exactly what he was proposing to you. You opened your mouth to protest. To tell him how absolutely ridiculous that was, but your words fell short. Closing your mouth again to look down and stare at the indentions the corners of the cardboard box had left in your skin.

You couldn’t say that you hadn’t let your eyes linger a little too long at Toji Fushiguro. Always noticing how easy he was on the eyes when your ex would make you tag along to work events. How his suits would perfectly contour to his body. Showing off his bulging muscles through the fabric. How he seemed to tower over you and everyone else with his height and domineering presence. How your gazes would linger a little too long on each other and how his fingertips would “accidentally” graze your hips when passing you.

You were taken away from your thoughts by the feeling of his fingers slowly caressing up and down your jaw. His touch soft, contrasting the rough calluses that lined his fingers. You also realized he had now moved directly in front of you and you were eye-level with his crotch.

“What’ll it be, sweetness?” The tip of his thumb travelled up to your bottom lip, smearing some of your lipgloss. “Y’gonna let me help you get back at him?”

You slowly looked up at him and nodded your head, still not trusting any words to come out of your mouth. He smiled down at you, removing the hand on your chin to pet your head and using his other to unbutton his slacks.

“Gonna make you feel so good, you’ll forget allllll about your little ex-boyfriend.”

You were still looking up at him dumbly as he freed heavy cock from the confines of his pants, subconsciously parting your lips and slightly sticking out your tongue at the sight of him. Relishing in the way he looked at you and the noises he made once his cock makes contact with your awaiting tongue.

“Already so good and fuckin’ obedient. Did he teach you that?” You shake your head and he cackles. Easing his way into your throat. “So you’re just naturally a whore, huh?” He lightly slaps your cheek, not even hard enough to sting, and moves from petting your head to gripping your hair once you take him all the way into your mouth. Testing your limits and pushing his way past the tight ring of muscle in the back of your throat, loving the way you choke and sputter around him. “Takin’ me so good. Bet that motherfucker couldn’t properly stuff your throat.”

Toji’s right- he couldn’t. He also isn’t quite as big as Toji is either, in both length and girth. It also seems that the man in front of you didn’t learn to fuck from porn like your ex did. Only pushing your limits a little bit at a time and not throatfucking you from the get-go. Also making sure you’re not suffocating on him for too long.

You began to move your tongue over the vein that ran on the underside of his cock, watching in satisfaction as he throws his head back and groans. Doing it again and again and watching his face contort in pleasure.

“Shit, baby, got the sweetest fuckin’ mouth.” His voice is huskier now, almost breathy. You watch as sweat begins to lightly bead across his forehead and his hands come off of you to loosen his tie around his collar. The air becoming too thick and hot for him. You suck him off with much more passion as you get used to his size. Bobbing your head up and down his length and occasionally pulling yourself off to lick on the sensitive skin around his balls. Not paying much mind to the spit that has run from your mouth and covered the bottom half of your face.

“That’s it- hah- fuck yeah… that’s it. Gonna cum down that pretty fuckin’ throat” You kept up your ministrations, using your hand to lightly squeeze his balls as you took his full length down your throat once more. Listening as Toji’s pants became progressively more and more uneven. Only taking a few more short moments before his abs tighten and he takes in a deep inhale as he shoots his load down your throat. His leg twitching as the coil in his belly snaps. Pulling off of him to stick out your tongue and show him that you swallowed it all.

“Such a good fuckin’ girl, aren’t you?” He gripped your chin tightly and you nodded your head dumbly, fiddling with the hem of your skirt. He smiled and gestured for you to walk over to the plush, black couch he kept in his office. A guiding hand resting on your lower back as he layed you down on your stomach. He took his time running his hands from your calves all the way up to your ass, like he was trying to memorize every dip in your skin. Once he reached the hem of your skirt, he flipped it up. Gently running the palms of his hands over the smooth skin and giving the right cheek a harsh slap and soothing the sting with the very same hand that inflicted it.

“Suckin’ dick make you this wet?” Your slick had soiled your panties, smearing onto your thighs. His fingers lightly ran across the soaked fabric. You felt the couch dip under his weight as he settled behind you, feeling the fabric of his haphazardly pulled down pants and the heat of whatever skin that was exposed press into you.

“Sucking yours does.” you gasp as he pushes your panties to the side to make contact with your swollen clit. The cool air of his office hitting your soaked center makes you shiver. “You’re gentler than I thought you’d be.”

“Oh baby,” He pauses, taking his hands off of you to maneuver himself around, “you haven’t had the worst yet.”

You’re comfused until you feel the tip of his cock prodding your entrance and begin to push in. Your walls greedily sucking him in even though it felt as if he was splitting you in two.

“Tight as a fuckin’ virgin, y’gotta open up for me, girl.” His fingers rub tight circles on your clit. Using that to his advantage to thrust his cock deeper and deeper into you until he’s bottomed out. Your hips arching into him as any remnants of pain begin to wash away and are overtaken with white-hot pleasure. His hands find purchase on your hips as his thrusts begin to speed up. Going harder into you and somehow hitting you deeper each time, causing tears to spring in corners of your eyes.

“Already cryin’ on my cock and we’ve barely even started? Slut can’t handle it?” He slaps your ass again, not caring if it stings. You furiously shake your head as moans and whimpers spill from your lips. Trying your hardest to match his brutal pace with your own hips. “Oh, you think you can take control now, huh? I’d watch it, little girl.”

At first you think he pushes your face into the couch with his hand. That’s until you realize that both his hands are still on your hips and it’s actually his foot that’s found its place on the back of your head as he continues to fuck the memory of your ex out of you. Your pussy clenching down on him at the mere thought of the position.

“Like being treated like a whore don’t you? Shitty man couldn’t do it like I can.” You couldn’t respond back even if you tried. Too caught up in the feeling of being stuffed full by the most skilled man you’ve ever fucked and biggest cock you’ve ever taken. Writhing under him as the pleasure of his tip repeatedly hitting your spot over and over again was becoming almost too much.

Toji must’ve felt the way your pussy began to tighten around him or how your moans were so loud the couch wasn’t muffling them well anymore. His hand snaked around your hip and back down to your clit to rub shapes on it, bringing your closer to your peak.

“That’s right, cum on this cock baby. Hah- cum all over my fuckin’ cock.” He spoke to you through gritted teeth and the sound went straight to your core. It wasn’t long after that your back slipped into a deeper arch and your cunt clenched down on him even harder. A white ring of cream forming around the base of his dick as he worked you through your orgasm and worked himself closer to his.

“Such a good girl. You’re gonna take my cum, yeah? Gonna let me fill you up?” You nodded a quick yes, pussy still quaking from your orgasm. the only thing keeping your hips from collapsing into the couch being the vice grip of his strong hands.

The foot pressed into your head was removed and replaced by his right hand gripping your hair and pulling you up to meet his face. Looking him in the eyes for the first time since he started fucking you and seeing the beast of a man he’s become. Pupils blown, hair messy, and face sweaty as his grunts get louder, more aggressive.

“So pretty baby. You’re my good, pretty girl, right? C’mon, daddy a kiss when he cums. You’ve been so. fucking. good.” The last of his words were punctuated by rough thrusts into your heat. His heavy balls slapping against your clit so hard it was making you jump. You craned your head back even more for your lips to meet his in a sloppy, lust-filled kiss as he lets out a final rough grunt into your mouth. The familiar warmth flooding your pussy as his thrusts begin to let up.

He’s gentle with you for the first time in a while, gently resting your head back down to the couch before slowly pulling his softening dick out, tucking it back into his underwear, and smoothing your skirt back down. Rubbing a hand over the arch of your back and letting you rest on his couch as he pulls off your soiled panties and pockets them for himself. Also noticing a patch of your slick that has soiled the front of his pants and smiling as a mix of both of your releases begin to trickle out of your spent hole. Using two of his fingers to push it back in. The room is quiet for the first time in a long while. Only sound being the oscillating box fan in the corner of the room. It says quiet for a while, until you break the silence.

“Don’t even think I can remember the fucker’s name anymore.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” You turn over onto your back to face him, watching closely as he fixes his suit to the best of his ability. “Wouldn’t mind seeing you again, if you’d like.”

He turns to face you, smirking again, “Can’t say I’d hate that.”

It’s your turn to smirk at him before letting your head roll over and rest again. Consumed with the thoughts of how that was definitely the best revenge plan you ever participated in.

You’re almost drifting off until that same thought wakes you up again. Sitting up to look at Toji.

“Wait, how was any of that a revenge ploy if he didn’t even see it?” Toji smirks, fixing his tie. Not even a second later you hear a knock on his door before Toji gives the visitor permission to enter.

“You wanted to see m-“ Your ex stops mid-sentence once he sees you lounging on his employer’s couch with his cum leaking out of you. “Wait, what is she doing here?”

“Baby brought your shit by.” Toji kicks the box towards him as he pulls your panties out of his back pocket and swinging them around his index finger. “Anything else you need? Or do you just wanna watch me fuck your ex-girl again?”

[wingedshadowfan]

tw: the scene where caitlyn and maddie are in bed together

a friend is rewatching arcane s2 rn and pointed out that even though it's very dark and kind of hard to tell, the room caitlyn and maddie are in in that scene doesn't look like caitlyn's room!!

now this might be a false alarm but if it isn't, here's what that implies:

caitlyn didn't let maddie into her actual bed (we all cheered!). now i very seriously doubt they're in maddie's house for reasons of wealth and convenience, which means there are like three possible ways things could've gone down w/ caitlyn and maddie sleeping together.

1) most likely caitlyn (and maddie, individually) took a guest bedroom somewhere in the council building, which means she's been so busy with the zaun invasion in pursuit of jinx, she literally hasn't been home and sleeping in her own bed (which is just sad because it implies overworking herself and disconnecting with her home and family, even the memory of the mother she's trying to avenge)

2) if this is just another room in caitlyn's house (which would be crazy, just imagine caitlyn's dad meeting maddie), has caitlyn been sleeping in her own bed when she's by herself and only going to this guest bedroom when maddie is with her?? that must've been so inconvenient and awkward to establish between them lol

3) if this is just another room in caitlyn's house and she hasn't been using it only when she's with maddie, that would imply she had the opportunity to sleep in her own bed (even without maddie) and she chose not to. could it be that after her fight with vi, caitlyn hasn't been sleeping in her own room in general because of the memories they shared there together?

i think 1) is the most likely, followed by 3) and then 2).

and lastly, let's remember that after the explosion that injures vi, caitlyn is sick with worry for her. jinx just surrenders and caitlyn can't even decide what to do with her - she's too worried abt vi recovering and likely wants it to be her decision too, having seen their family bond and truly understood now.

caitlyn most likely takes vi to a hospital/doctor and then takes her to her house, so she can ensure her safety. caitlyn who's been so busy she hasn't been sleeping in her own bed, is calling the enforcers out of zaun, and is preparing for war lets an injured vi sleep in her bed immediately, even before they've talked things out between them (which means a lot, esp if she never let maddie into her bed, or if she had right until now).

moreover, in the scene where vi wakes up and we see loris has been taking care of her too, we also see a bunch of throw pillows on the other side of the bed next to vi. they're obviously not for him. caitlyn has been sitting (not sleeping) there, taking care of vi even with everything else going on. waiting for her to wake up so she can make the call for what happens to jinx. true fucking love or whatever.

symbolically, caitlyn either returns to her house, to herself and her family (after seeing the love in vi's), to what matters, in order to take care of vi and because she's not commander anymore, at least not in the original intended way once jinx is captured and she calls off the zaun invasion, or she's still in a council bedroom because there's yet much work to do but has been finding time to come home and take care of vi despite that.

i also want to point out another thing. when vi wakes up and comes to confront caitlyn abt imprisoning jinx (which, honestly, is better than letting a random enforcer kill her or have her cause more damage which is what could've happened if she'd let her go, which caitlyn eludes to), maddie is already there in the room with caitlyn but we only see one chair. maddie isn't meant to be there in caitlyn's house. she isn't meant to sit down and make herself comfortable. (and yes, we see two chairs when ambessa comes to talk to caitlyn but it's also intentional what gets shown when). when caitlyn tells her, "check on my father?" and dismisses her before she has the chance to interact with vi, she means this is all her relationship w/ maddie is to her. and in the very end of the show when we see vi humming her mother's song to herself, she's in the same room. there are two chairs there now.

i'm so fucked but this is all speculation.

[thebibliosphere]

Anyway, @brynwrites also reblogged a very good point on a post which I cannot reblog because I assume OP blocked me, presumably because I am the person they're bitching about because, uh, yeah, I literally can't think of any other book other than mine that has that exact rep, lol.

Not to mention someone specifically calling me out in the notes (:

But I'm feeling petty, so I'm just going to post my response here anyway. Specifically in response to the person in the notes who said they have no idea what my book is about despite seeing it posted everywhere, which tells me one certain thing.

They are not clicking my links.

Like friends, I cannot tell you the lengths I go to so that people can make an informed decision about buying my book and still ask me basic questions which tell me THEY'RE NOT CLICKING THE LINKS.

I provide a synopsis, themes, content tags, heat ratings, reps-- I even explain WHY there are two editions of the book and also how Hunger Pangs came to be. I link them in all my promo posts so people can click them, read more, and decide if Phangs is for them.

The fact that people are complaining they have no idea what my book is about is on them. I cannot spoon-feed you every detail in brief promo posts that I'm trying to design to be as non-annoying as possible because, haha, fun glimpse into what my life looks like; when I DO reblog the longer posts with all that info, I get people telling me to KMS for posting walls of text onto their dash, or people just straight up telling me, "I'm not reading all of that" or "is it gay, though?"

So like, what the fuck am I supposed to do?

Anyway, read Danny's take. And also, click on the link authors provide. I promise you, they are there for a reason.

[us-the-voices-and-more-voices-2]

random Conner being a good bullshitter moment

Teacher: today class we are doing a genealogy thing, basically we are going to track your family tree. It’s an assessment of your research skills, go ham just make sure your information is correct if it isn’t you will be docked accordingly.

Later

classmate: so Conner? How are you going?

Conner: oh I realise my family history is a bit confusing but when the day comes I’ll explain it, how are you going?

classmate: oh fine, my family already had a family tree book made so I just have to present it.

Conner: cool, I have to make mine from scratch but it’s alright.

a week later after a few battles with random space pirates

teacher: well class I hope you’re ready to present your assignments, who wants to go first?

Conner: *raises his hand*

teacher: oh well, Conner go ahead.

Conner: *clears throat* okay, so my dad clark is actually my half brother *conner starts to singsong* my mother is actually some rich lady named Lex, my dad is actually this guy Elliot, my half brother is also my older brother, I know it makes no sense but keep on listening. My cousin is Kara, my family is Jonathan and Martha Kent, my stepmom is Lois lane and my nephew is Jon Kent. Yup that’s it.

the class applauds after Conner’s PowerPoint presentation

teacher: wait how is clark your half brother?

Conner: just is, my dad Elliot knocked up Lex and he left shortly afterwards. He was one of Jonathan’s distant relatives, he ended up leaving clark with the Kent’s because well easier than leaving him alone, since his mother died when he was a kid. He did die only a short while later it was only supposed to be temporary until he did die. So they ended up adopting clark, he’s still a full blooded Kent but yeah his dad is dead. And I’m his half brother because our dad had a kid with this rich lady Lex. As you can see on the chart. And Kara is our cousin who I don’t know who’s parents are.

teacher: well that’s something, I honestly was expecting something else.

Conner: I’m still in touch with rich lady Lex, since she’s a doctor and did raise me for the first years of my life, and I have family health issues. But I am the Jonathan and Martha’s kid though, Lex is just reluctant about me being with the other side of the family because she didn’t really know them well. Since dad died long after she knew she was pregnant, i was a ivf baby lol because she froze his sperm. I call clark dad because well he’s been my dad. But we are half brothers, it’s more of a “I didn’t know we were half brothers so I’m going to call you dad” thing I was 14 when I came to live with them, I had a falling out with my mother.

the class listens eagerly because this is so much Kent lore, and explains literally everything about why the fuck they look a bit different and where clark came from! the decades long mystery is solved!

Conner: so now I just alternate between the two houses, it’s not a split custody agreement or something it’s just I like living with the Kent’s. And I’m old enough to make my own decisions, so it’s just mostly living at the Kent’s and visiting mother.

teacher: well that’s something. Thank you for sharing this, you receive a B+ because I don’t have access to any of your records or know who the heck you’re talking about so B+. Whoever’s next get ready.

later

Conner sitting at the dinner table eating some roast, and slightly kicking his feet under the table asks

Conner: I did my family history thing today

Jonathan: you didn’t screw up and tell everyone something that could trace us back to superman right? *chuckles*

Conner: nope, did finally explain that clark is my half brother.

Jonathan: *fork drops* what

connner: well obviously no one believed he’s my dad, because that’d make him a teen father or something and honestly it was genuinely getting pretty weird. So I explained that Elliot, Jor el. Was my father, and that he had a kid with a rich woman named Lex because technically it’s true who can actually confirm or deny that, through ivf after Elliot died. He also had a kid with unnamed woman who is Clark’s mother, he left clark with you as he couldn’t leave him alone and he died shortly after. Isn’t that a better back story?

Jonathan super surprised by conner’s web weaving skills just nods

Conner: so now I can talk about Lex, no one thinks I’m a teen father’s child anymore, and you have some one to blame if someone does actually accidentally test Clark’s blood. I am amazing!

Jonathan: well, I guess I’ll inform everyone of the situation you just made, but I commend you for your hard work. You did a good job kid.

Prev | current | next

(yes this is a series please read the first one it's hilarious)

[meteor752]

Not much of a compliment but HEY ILL TAKE IT!!

How each Greek god would be like in bed except not all of them because that would literally be insane okay I’m not putting myself through that

Also just fyi this is based purely on vibes and not any particular myths. If a specific myth goes against what I am saying here, then like I do not care.

Let’s start with the big boy, Zeus.

Very selfish lover. Like, obviously, it’s Zeus, what’dya expect? Thing is tho, he is fully capable of being an incredible bed partner. If he’s trying to impress whoever he is laying with, or possibly a third party member, then he can be sweet and caring and attentive and make the experience nothing short of divine. Most of the time he just doesn’t do that. Fucking bitch.

Hera is honestly just as bad. Since she stays faithful (for some reason), she’s only ever having sex with Zeus, and he for sure isn’t doing anything to give her pleasure, so she gotta take it for herself. If you managed to take Hera to bed, well then first of all congratulations, and second you are getting absolutely nothing. Just don’t sleep with these two, it’s not worth it

Apollo is the opposite, an incredibly generous and doting lover, you’re guaranteed a wonderful time. The problem with him though is that the concept of a one night stand is not a thing in his book. You’ll have sex with him one time, and he’ll be convinced that you two are madly in love and trust me he will tell you that. Historically being a mortal lover of Apollo will just end horribly, so don’t take the risk.

Hermes is meanwhile the king of one night stands. You’ll not even have come down from you’re orgasm and he’ll already be out the door, sending you a text that just says “Thanks for the good time :P” and you will never see him again.

Side note, I totally headcanon Hermes and Apollo to have fucked once, and Apollo has been infatuated ever since (and is sure Hermes is too) while Hermes does not remember that this has happened.

Aphrodite and Dionysus are in similar boats, but like also not. They’re on the opposite sides of the same scale but idk what that scale is. But both of them are truly freaky as fuck. They can and will try anything and everything, which can occasionally result in the death of their bed partner if they are mortal. I really wanna see the two of them have sex, but like not for any pornographic reason, but because I think if the two of them got together they’d invent kinks and positions the human mind would never be able to comprehend. Your brain might explode.

Ares is so funny to me, because he’s whatever the opposite of a power bottom is called. A Weak Top. Whenever he fucks someone who’s not Aphrodite, they usually want him to be this mean aggressive dom because you know, god of war and bloodshed, but like Ares thinks doing anything other than missionary is too intense and kinky. He’ll rip a man’s throat out with his teeth in the battlefield, but he once started crying because someone asked if he could choke them in bed. You start describing a scene to him and he will just safeword immediately.

The times that Hades takes someone other than his wife to bed, he is…fine. He’s a good lover and he’ll take care of your needs, but it is very clear that his heart is not fully in it. He’d just rather be with his wife lol.

To me Hephaestus has the vibe of like, he knows what sex is theoretically, like he’s read about it and stuff, but he doesn’t fully get it. The flesh is willing but the spirit is kinda confused. It’s more of a mundane task to him, not something you hate doing but also not something to be fully enjoyed. Def some flavour of ace.

Poseidon will get sea creatures involved, whether you like it or not. He’ll turn into a fish, or he’ll turn you into a fish, or there will just also be fish there, there’s just fish. I don’t know what life decisions I made that lead to me having a threesome with Poseidon the god of the sea and an orca, but here we are I guess.

Artemis and Athena are both service tops. They’re ace, but they will take care of you.

Hestia is also ace but she doesn’t enjoy sex in the slightest. She’ll gladly have you over for tea though!

Demeter has the vibe of like, like she enjoys sex the same way a hyper Christian woman does. She’s not sexually active and turns her nose up at the other gods’ constant love making, but she’s just really repressed and secretly loves getting down and dirty.

That’s it lol

[raya-rhaenyra-ahsoka]

My thoughts on Ep.5 - A God Buys Us Cheeseburgers, A rant (Spoilers Ahead!)

First of all, the chaos with what happened in the Arch was expected, but Annabeth seeing the Fates was not expected.

Annabeth insisting that Percy is alive, and went to find him near the water.

Percy casually greeting them hi. Like he wasn’t stung by the Chimera and fell off the St. Louis Arch. This will never be not funny.

Annabeth rushing to hug Percy and didn’t even care that he was soaked.

Me, internally: PERCABETH! PERCABETH! PERCABETH! 😍🎉

Percy just now realizing that a god could not have stolen the master bolt and might have been helped by someone. Grover and Annabeth looking at him like, seriously?

This convo:

Percy: Why are you being weird with me again? I thought we’re not doing that anymore.

Annabeth: I’m not being weird.

Percy: Yes, you are. You’ve been weird since we left the Arch.

Again, that’s their relationship.

Percy assuming it’s because of the hug. And Annabeth being like, No idiot I saw the Fates! Percy, honey, you’re the one being weird about it.

At this point, Imma give Grover some popcorn while he watches them argue.

Biker Ares casually asking 3 kids if they need help. Definitely not sus.

Percy, Annabeth, and Grover hiding behind the road barrier like, uh, no, we’re good. Idk, but that’s funny to me.

Ares snorting and saying they’re behind schedule and offering to help his little cousin.

Ares immediately recognizing Annabeth as Athena’s kid. Ares being like, Omfg she sounds just like my sister. That’s definitely her kid.

So a biker offering to help 3 minors in the middle of nowhere and offering them food. In other people’s perspective, that’s definitely sus.

Ares being a Twitter Troll is something I never knew I need.

Percy and Annabeth being so unimpressed with Ares was so funny. Like, so this is the god of war? Really?

Gabe painting Percy as a fugitive, and Percy being pissed about it. Not surprised.

Ares being pumped that there’s a war coming.

Percy and Annabeth fucking ready to fight Ares, and Grover’s just there like, let’s all calm down.

You left your sheild? Like, forgot it on a merry-go-round? Girl, you’re talking to a god.

Negotiating with Ares 101:

Ares: Okay, the satyr stays here while you two get my shield.

Percy and Annabeth: No!

Grover: Okay, sure.

Percy and Annabeth: wtf

The Waterland giving off steampunk/horror movie vibes is something I’m here for.

Percy making plans to take Annabeth to see a movie in the middle of their death quest just because she admitted to never having seen one is just so sweet. PERCABETH!😍

Annabeth being fascinated by Hephaestus’ engineering.

Grover’s therapy session with Ares to get more info is also something I never knew I needed.

The f*cking Thrill Ride O’ Love! IT’S HAPPENING!

Book fans rn:

Annabeth: Don’t you even try to tell me not to be weird about this.

Percy: I didn’t say anything.

Annabeth: I can feel you thinking it.

Oh, my babies. PERCABETH! 😍

Percy calling the Thrill Ride O’ Love a ghost ride is something I agree on.

The awkward silence while they ride the rowboat though, and then suddenly you hear, WHAT IS LOVE? BABY DON’T HURT ME... That shit cracked me up.

The light projections in the tunnel telling Hephaestus’ story.

The ride turning into a horror boat ride to a whitewater rafting ride was so unexpected. I’d pay to see that kind of boat ride rather than an actual tunnel-of-love ride.

Them having to jump and Percy unknowingly pulling Annabeth to safety with his water superpowers. He’s a waterbender and he doesn’t know it. LOL

Ares, the literal god of war, just ranting off to a random satyr he found in the middle of nowhere about his overachiever sister and her feathered pet will never be not funny.

Annabeth not hesitating to sit on the chair, and Percy stopping her.

SEAWEED BRAIN! SEAWEED BRAIN! SEAWEED BRAIN! SHE SAID THE THING! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!

Book fans:

[Spoiler] To non-book-readers, that's her nickname for him.

Percabeth arguing about a life/death decision. This is their relationship.

Percy giving Annabeth Riptide. He trusts her. Aww. 😍

Percy having to sit on the chair, while Annabeth gets the shield.

Annabeth nearly backing out at the last second, while Percy assures her that he’s okay while trying not to cry.

Annabeth ignoring the shield then immediately and desperately tries to free Percy.

Annabeth bargaining with Hephaestus. Maybe, I was that way once, but I don’t wanna be that way anymore. I won’t be like all of you.

Hephaestus releasing Percy was definitely his way of saying, Girl, same. You’re a good kid. Imma make sure you’re Mom knows that.

THIS PIC! THIS IS HISTORICAL RIGHT HERE! GO BACK TO THIS POST AFTER THIS SHOW HAS SEVERAL SEASONS AND MOUNT ST. HELENS ERUPTS. *wink-wink

Percy and Annabeth going back to the diner with the shield casually, and then like, we got your shield, now where tf is our ride?

Ares’ ride: The Kindness Internation truck a.k.a. illegal animals smuggling van.

Thank you for the emotional abuse and the cheeseburgers and the ride! ~ Grover Underwood. Iconic!

Grover telling Percy and Annabeth about his therapy session with Ares: I know who stole the master bolt!

Of course, it’s a cliffhanger. But nothing will beat the HoO:MoA one.

Bruh, the amount of Percabeth content in this episode is just *chef’s kiss*. It’s all coming together. I can’t even fathom how much of an emotional rollercoaster I was watching this episode. It just keeps getting better and better! 😍

[knight-princess]

Appreciation post for:

• Wererats. Fucked up little beasties. Do they turn into people on the full moon or did they used to be people, I can’t remember and Boorman certainly never explained. Look like roadkill and sincerely want to fuck you up. Two heads for some reason. Only appear once and are dope and real animatronics and everything I’m pretty sure

• “Chloe Allagash’s brave little man”, otherwise known just as Allagash. Insults extraordinaire. Spent like. ten years in a box pretending to be his best mate and was so committed to that bit he tried to sell it to his best mate’s other best mate and daughter. Gave up his life to fight trolls and save the gang. Hates olives. Iconic

• Madmartigan, who I spent far too long convinced was actually called Martigan and nicknamed “Mad” Martigan by all his mates. Also in a box when we meet him. Tries to feed roots to a newborn. Slays in pink. Souped up on the love potion, gains himself an enemies to lovers arc with the hot badass warrior queen

• Sorsha Tanthalos, said hot badass warrior, redemption arc speedrun, kiss in the middle of battle pro, stop listening to your evil mom and make your own choices queen. Pissed off that the dorky hot rogue confessed his undying love to her and it was just love potion. “‘I dwell in darkness without you’ and it went away???” Go off queen. You can fix that never fear. Dopest sword ever but also that would be so so sucky to get stabbed with because fuck that is a lot of serrations. Is it all that functional? Don’t know but it looks awesome. 10/10. Goes straight from being henchman to her evil mom to trying to run a whole kingdom, raise three kids and keep one of them from dying to fulfil the prophesy. Makes some dodgy decisions. Complains about it all to her (literal) captive audience. Saves her daughters life. Complicated queen

• Sorsha x Madmartigan. Enemies to lovers classic with all the fun twists. “Love her?!? I don’t love her! She kicked me in the face!” Oh you just wait buddy. Couple affirming kiss mid battle??? Oh fuck yeah, sign me the fuck up. “I dwell in darkness without you.” Wait. Was that foreshadowing

• Jade and Elora being besties. Unexpected and delightful. Elora calling her “J” nearly made me hit the cieling. You’re telling me they’ve got nicknames already??? Sign me the fuck up. I love it. Need more of it pls and thank you

• Lili of Cashmere. On the wyrms milk. Dresses like a Greek goddess. Known by the alias “the Crone” which she hates even tho she really is secretly a skeleton held together with goo and a love of drama (I’m reusing that description ok I enjoyed it too much the first time). Evil makeover specialist. A+ Lili I love you

• And last but not least, smart and sassy trolls. @lowkeyed1 is a lifesaver and provided me with the transcript for the episode bc I remembered they had some truly iconic lines but couldn’t for the life of me remember what they were. So we’ve got: “He’s not appealing, but he speaks his mind, and I suppose that’s something” of Sarris’s own brother. Of the Crone: “Is she the eldritch nightmare people make her out to be? Yes. But she has her positive qualities too.” Lol fair. The forever iconic “I deplore those who rouse rabble” and my personal favourite “yeah, cos when I said ‘I do’, what I really meant was ‘explain it to me like I’m an imbecile’.”

[malwaredykes]

ok. finished honest hearts. most of my inventory is plants and mushroom and Soups And Potions And Elixirs made from said plants and mushrooms. which is excellent.

the salt-upon-wounds confrontation was Tchruly garbo like. first of all they lit up ole josh before anyone even had the chance to say anything LOL that wasnt like Bad necessarily just rly funny. like yeah we can negotiate before anything breaks out *the camera pans to Jotchua Grams lifeless body on the pavement* but um second of all what the hell was that dialogue. "grrrr im gonna kill you" "[speech 75] no thats stupid. dont" "umm okei :) but i'll be back >:(" *runs away* Like. man. listen. throughout the entire dlc i Did Not want to be fighting all those white legs lol. i didnt know those people. you know i generally hate the Hostile By Default Irredeemable Canon Fodder Raiders crap and in this case its just especially egregious to me, with them being a Tribe and with me being some random ass normie strolling into the area getting instructed by the local white saviors. like, okay, since i Was getting involved, then if anyone deserved to Feel The Judgment Of Mine fall upon them it was in fact salt-upon-wounds with his track record of being a horrible fucking person. so i had to fight my way through all those white legs only for the Problem Guy to be like "Hm Okay. Deal. You Leave Forever And I Get To Live. Sounds Good. Sucker" like. fuck no. youre dead. this is for waking clouds husband how DARE you make my bald queen SAD

which btw i did encourage cloud to get mad at daniel for hiding that from her. like yeah girl dont take this shit from him. youre allowed to feel angry. who does he think he is. making decisions for the sorrows like youre all children. be mad at him. chase him out. tell him to never show his stinky mug around these parts. If You Want. ahh but then the ending slides said she forgave him.... well i suppose i have to respect her choice... but... cloud honey if you ever wanna team up and chase daniels stinky mug far away just give me a call

i also encouraged follows-chalk to go out there and experience the world outside... i really hated how he felt obligated to ask joshua permission, and how joshua was like Well 🥺 I wont tell him what to do but 🥺 Is it wise... I just worry about my foolish little lamb 🥺... like. Shut Uuuupppp.... chalk is an adult. i think. either way what do You know. jotchua. last time you ventured into The Civilized Lands (lol) you were a fucked up genocide army general so forgive me for thinking you might not have the most objective and up to date outlook here. Anyway. chalk come hang out sometime. come to the lucky 38. youll meet my epic swag friends and family. LOL bit of an aside but (mostly so i dont become insane because of the dlcs writing) i like to imagine that most of the time chalk expresses incredulity about some Civilized World Concept like gambling (-_-) or big dams or big weapons, hes literally fucking with you. like hes joking around. he used to mess with daniel and jotchua like that and now hes doing it with you. like Wow... How Strange... You Say It Is Called A... "Window".... 😂😂😂...

loving how the ending slides barely mentioned joshua also. like wtf happened to him. who knows. damn maybe he did die and i didnt even notice. im sorry jotchua. may your soul quickly find its way to NOWHERE lol #owned

final verdict: waking-cloud and follows-chalk are great, joshua graham is an extremely funny character, daniel is nothing to me, the area is cool, the plot is dumb as hell, the whole thing is racist, the quests are boring. 3/10

[saphig-iawn]

Day 7 of Turning me into Me

I've done it. My dear sweet girlies, my shes, gays, theys, and whatever-the-hays, I've done it. I have gone 7 whole days sticking to my plan. On November 12th I saw my face without a beard for the first time in 11 years and while my mask of masculinity was gone I still didn't like what I saw. I chose that day to be the worst I would ever feel about myself and made a decision to put the future me into production, rather than wait for HRT to do it all for me. I was inspired by a trans friend of mine who went through a similar journey to get surgery and she just told me so bluntly how easy it'd be. So I did.

And here I am, a whole week of walking every day, a whole week of not eating when I'm bored, a whole week of no sugar drinks (sorry monster). I am the happiest I have ever been. My head is so full of the things I'd wear, the makeup I'd try, the ways I can enjoy my body (also tbh I am really excited about the clothes holy FUCK). It was as easy as my friend said, "just don't do it, lol" were literally the words out of her mouth. I even took my first selfie that I liked.

But these aren't the only reasons why I'm still going. It is everyone who has come by and seen me talking about my journey and have shown me support. I've had DMs, Asks, RBs all telling me how they found my writing at the right time, and also at the wrong time and giving them something to think about. The fact that little old me could be a single part of someone's journey into their true self is just.. it.. it makes this so much better and so much more worthwhile.

You see, I used to be in a big discord server that belonged to a streamer. Over time it became harder to remain there. I wasn't out at the time but had so many girlies who were and they fought so well when laddish bigotry and cishet male-ry would bubble up and ruin people's day. But then one particularly bad night would result in blatant transphobia being slung in the chat and despite so many girlies calling it out, it was normalised by the server owner. I was DMing the girlies about how it just fucking sucked and that I wanted to do something but I was so scared and so tired and they sympathised with me. But I had had enough and thus turned my coming out into a weapon. I wanted them to know that their words hurt so many more people than they think; the silent queers that sit and see bigotry become commonplace in a space that has been advertised as safe, the questioning girls-to-be and boys-to-be seeing people write off their feelings under Devil's Advocacy. I told them they weren't allies, there was no support, and I was coming out and they better fucking pack it in. But when the culture is entrenched, even something like that doesn't change much. But my coming out caused a ripple, and I did see the names of people I had never interacted with before show love, and I knew that it was enough for them. I hope that me, setting myself ablaze in that server and leaving from the ashes, was enough for those names I saw.

A big thank you to everyone who has said hello, got in touch, or even just liked. I have such a deep and unshakeable love for you.

[kanmom51]

JK live 5 August 1:41 am KST

Part 2

*cr./To the creators of the media used in this post.

For those who missed out on part 1:

Before I start with part 2, brace yourselves. This one is packed with clips that are a MUST to see. Seriously. This was such a long live but it was so enjoyable because of JK's hyper mood at start and his adorable quirkiness throughout the whole live. It was a pleasure to watch and this post has a few lovely moments from the second half of the live. My suggestion is do take your time and watch the clips. I can assure you, you will not regret it.

Did we call part 2 Makguksu blues?

We sure did.

And this, my friends, is why.

JK, right through the second half of this live, is dreaming of eating his dish. Stopping from some music at times, or singing, or pondering, but mainly dreaming of eating. Man is hungry. Stomach growling hungry.

So, at the point we left him he's telling us again that he wants to eat.

And he's really struggling. So much so he's imagining himself making the dish.

First hour obsessing over messing up at the concert.

Next hour (well overlapping too) contemplating and obsessing over making himself something to eat.

Tries to move on with music, going to the bathroom and to refill his drink.

Talking/singing in the background. - a JK usual.

When he comes back he seems a little pensive again.  Nodding head once in a while.

Opens up one of his Spotify gifts – the mic he got, trying to figure out how to connect it.  He puts it away to charge a little.

WE have a few relatively quiet minutes. He’s thinking, not talking.  Music playing, he’s on his laptop, mood kind of feels like it’s a little heavier than before, even if before he was hard on himself most of it was vocal and done with a smile.  Now he becomes more pensive.

Singing to Malibu nights by Lany.  He knows the lyrics off by heart!!

So, remember this?

And this?

And quite the coincidence... song playing at 1:18 hr. of the live. Now that WAS a coincidence. But funny how the universe seems to always align for them, eh?

He asks us if we know a playlist called Life sucks. 

Malibu nights is on that playlist as well.

Definitely in a mood.

It could also be the adrenaline rush just winding down as well... Probably the combination of both.

Convinced himself to eat later in the day (says tomorrow, but it is already tomorrow, lol).

After a few minutes he’s back to reading comments, reads a comment asking for him to play Winter bear, he’s looking for it and then plays it.

And he starts to interact with the comments again.  Someone tells him their grandmother said he’s so beautiful and he smiles and says thank you, bowing as well.

Asks if he should watch some covers of Seven – good decision to lighten his mood.

So now he’s vibing to Seven. 

And he starts adlibbing – his fave thing to do and something he’s great at (mostly) – and it's about the concert again, lol.

So yeah, still not over it.  Lol.

Ok, and he does this:

Ahhhha, literally.🤣🤣

Doing the Seven cover is good for him. It does lift his mood slightly.

JK again looking at comments around 10 minutes in to listening to seven, and of course,

What in the actual fuck? Again bloody Ian in the comments. And again JK, not amused saying:

JK is literally like :

And with these fans you know:

Goes back to the music. 

Back to the adlibbing for food. Man is damn hungry.

And he's back to the comments.  Asked if he likes cupcakes, says he doesn’t really eat them much, but he tries to say it in English. 

You can see he is really trying with the English. Making the effort!

Comment: Would you like to collaborate with latino artist?

JK: Idk. Didn’t think about it (answers in English again).

JK: Should I go to sleep, I want to go to sleep now.  But then he tells us that if he ends the live now he’ll go make himself makguksu and that’s why he isn’t turning the live off, lol.

I want to eat makguksu so much, giggling.  That’s why he isn’t ending the live.

And did he just say DAYMN?  Like with the accent and all? Lol.

And now telling this to us in English. Because this is the vital piece of information that EVERYONE needs to know. HE WANTS TO EAT MAKGUKSU!!!

Ok, so this is hilarious.  He says, in English I’m HANGRY.  I’m assuming he meant hungry, and that was the translation, but could he have actually meant hangry?  Lol. I mean, with the level of frustration being so DAYMN ravenous, perhaps he is already HANGRY. LMAO.

Ok, so as I was writing these lines, well more like half an hour after (but who's counting?), RM had his live and among other very interesting things he shared with us, he happened to drop this little tidbit:

Is Joon telling us he's the one giving JK English lessons?

I mean, it would make perfect sense.

And explain JK's use of slang words rather than a cleaner English. Words like cause and daymn and hangry.

And if we are already on the subject, do we remember who was also getting English lessons at the surprisingly and very coincidental time as JK?

Let me jog your memory.

A certain someone who happens to live in the same complex that Joon lives in. A certain someone that told us he's getting lessons in English as well. At night. Kind of when JK was getting his. Ooh, coincidences galore.

I wonder if they all sit together in JM's lounge drinking and trying to have conversations in English. Or perhaps drinking and watching Friends without the translations.

Guess it's time to move on...

Next he listens/watches to Boynextdoor cover of seven.

Thinks they are cute and then shows us the signed album he received from them. See? That shelf was his signed debut albums.

He wants to go eat makguksu, again, he needs to go, he is a real soldier hanging on not giving in.

At this point, around the 2 hour mark he’s really had enough, he wants to end the live (has been wanting to end the live for several minutes already), go wash up, but then says he’ll listen to another couple covers.

He tells us he likes the covers that also rearrange the track.

JK: I want to go eat, but I really can’t eat. 

So for the next 20 minutes it’s all about he has to go to sleep and we have to go to sleep, but then he needs to sing with the spotify mic.

Ok, so his reaction with this mic was bloody hilarious. He kept getting a fright from it, and his reactions priceless.

First when turning it on.

🤣

Now that he has the mic it’s like he gets a new wind and he starts another round of karaoke.

He wants to seeing a calm song.  Easy song.

Enjoys making gluk gluk sounds with the mic. Asmr, he loves it, lol.

Sings All of my life – a song he is already familiar with.  He sings it karaoke, quite differently than his cover 5 years ago. 

But before, he needs to go find the lyrics.

This song meant a lot to him back in 2018.  I feel like it’s still emotional, but much has happened since, water under the bridge.  He even sings the last verse, the one about the breakup. The one he made sure not to sing back then. 

He shares with us that he had issue hearing the key (in the song) and that his ears are off since catching the cold.

He then sings Sofa, brings the speaker up closer to hear it better. 

Watch the clip!! This time JK gets a fright from the speaker. His reactions. He is absolutely adorable. Precious.

We are adlibbing again.

And then it’s really time to end.

It’s just “it’s really time to sleep now.”  “bye” and he’s off.  Well, not before he once again has a jump scare from his mic.

And then good night and good morning and bye and he’s gone.

Can’t help wonder if he gave in and went to make himself to eat or went to bed, lol.

So, there we have it,

Almost 2 and a half hour live.

First half – upset about messing up at the concert.

Second half – I want to eat makguksu.

Lots of adlibbing, all about messing up at the concert and wanting to eat makguksu.

That's pretty much it.

Oh, and how could I forget?

I’m done gaming, noo more gaming, no more gaming room, I dismantled it all, and not even doing the live in that room to make sure you understand I am no longer gaming. PERIOT.

Wait, you think that's the end of it?

Hell no.

After JK turned off his Weverse live, the man, who told us he's going to bed, was suddenly curious and decided to go live on TikTok. Again.

This bellow being a link to his first live a couple days back:

And now, after disabling the gift option (and making a point of telling us so in this last live):

Yep, now I'm done!

Woohoo!!!

All up to date on JK's lives.

I'm ready for more lives JK.... Bring them on...

[softpine]

I'm still thinking about your characters and what their valentines day would look like currently where your story is so can I ask what everyone would be doing? I imagine Austin bringing flowers to Elaine and she loses it. Would Matt text Stevie? Mickaela and Dan pegging. Casper and Coco 👀????? Alisa messing with Jada. Stevie maybes annoying KD asking her what she's doing for v-day

omg i'm sorry my answer is so late 😭 if this were just a normal valentine's day and nothing life-threatening was happening to anyone, then what you said is exactly how everyone would be spending it ;-;

stevie annoying KD on valentine's day is sooooo true oh my god i can only imagine how insufferable she would be. she would bake a bunch of cookies and bring them into work like "here's a cookie for you! and here's a cookie for your...... partner? 🤨 and here's a cookie for your..... child? 👀 and here's a cookie for your..... other child? 🤔 just tell me when to stop. here's a cookie for your... dog? 🧐 here's a cookie for...."

coco is BOOKED for valentine's day. sorry to anyone who wishes they could make plans with her, she goes all out for this!! not even for monetary gain (it's actually a pretty slow day for sw), it's just always been her favorite holiday and she loves the decorations & outfits. although this would be the first time she's been 100% single since she was a teenager, so that would be tough, but that's all the more reason to throw herself into her work. casper is not part of this equation, he's going on a failed tinder date and making his mom sad because she was sure this would be the one sjkfjsd

definitely agree about austin buying elaine flowers, but really all elaine wants is a heartfelt card attached to them 🥺 she also organizes galentine's day (asa counts as an honorary gal) every year 💖

matt would fumble his way into some awkward misunderstanding with stevie, probably involving another goddamn stuffed animal fjskjfsd

jada would literally call off work on valentine's day. she is NOT emotionally prepared for whatever hell alisa would bestow upon her 😭 and since her dad is dating again she'd probably be alone but that's perfectly fine with her. a moment of peace is better than a valentine

finn would do something so sappy for valentine's day if here were here ughhhhh :( he'd have to step it up since he's already given asa flowers a few times and of course the unbeatable gift that was the antlers... the greatest gift asa could give to finn would be to chill the fuck out and not break the universe for one singular day lol

caroline starts getting cynical about love around valentine's day because so many people come into her shop asking for their bf/gfs name tattooed and she has to turn them away because she's not going to be complicit in bad decisions (DON'T ask her what tattoo she had covered up on her back 👿) but then she comes home and beth cooks dinner for her and lights one of their good candles and she believes in love again 😌

and we must not forget mikaela/danny pegging, as if they ever need a reason lmao. they're doing some convoluted roleplay that only they understand, making good use of their repertoire of spirit halloween costumes

[bamboobrat]

succession s4 e5 recap: swedish elon and his logan roy tribute band

time is a flat circle and we are back to ken hyping himself listening to rap, driving to the office.

anyone feeling nostalgic yet?

he is immediately caught off guard by the fact that roman and shiv are already there.

also he seems like the worst boss ever.

i really don't like ken when he is not hitting rock bottom.

(there is a movie about a sleeping robot in a cave that takes up too much time in this episode. let's not get into all that)

the old guard checks up on the CE-bros before their trip to norway.

matchy matchy&lt;3

turns out mattson wants them all there (why wouldn't he?) so THE GANG IS GOING TO NORWAY! lets bleed the swede!*

*as a norwegian, i approve this message

mortality has set into team krank, as they put on compression socks before the flight.

krank is not here to have fun. krank has no young mistress to impress. krank is serious.

shiv has noticed ken's leaks to the media from last week because she is boss. it's the comeback we've been waiting for.

but most importantly, she is waging a very important war against tom and his stupid new sneakers:

the sibs say they can kill tom for her. that's brotherly love.

hugo is not having a good time.

i am tho.

gerri rallies the troops by shitting on europeans.

yes mommy tell me i'm weak because i have free healthcare! sit on my face

gerri for CEO. always.

they accurately depict what it is like driving in norway:

(this is why i don't have my licence)

the gang arrives in the motherland and it's beautiful, but rainy (so authentic) and are all like WHY THESE WOOD CABINS SO SMALL?!

ironic because jeremy lives in fucking denmark.

anyway, whatever this is:

I DO NOT APPROVE!

the trip up to mount olympus is interrupted by con saying he can send a picture of their dead dad to the group chat.

nobody wants to see it.

also, marcia is putting logan in a kilt like the fucking bay city rollers and con had to cancel a room full of working class whites in cleveland. the sacrifice.

they give con carte blanche for the whole funeral thing, which is probably a terrible decision.

the funeral is going to be one big campaign rally, i'm serious.

the others have to settle for a nice lil scandi brunch spread. what a hard life.

i don't say this often, but i would be hugo in this scenario, piling onto my plate like it's nobody's business.

karolina has a cute lesbian moment.

she says something in swedish at some point, but let me tell you, i understand swedish and i didn't even pick up on it. no shade to dag, but lol.

hugo doesn't understand how ski jumping works.

i thank the writers for putting this joke in there, even if literally no one other than random scandi people will get it.

it's like the opposite of danny boyle's the beach<3 give back to the community<3

roman enters negotiations and puts his fingers in the caviar.

you think i didn't notice? after all this time, you must know i notice everything.

the CE-bros make the village elders proud, as mattson offers 187 per share as long as he gets ATN.

also, gerri does a second take looking back at roman. these are the crumbs i am destined to live on, i guess. roman doesn't want to give up ATN tho, probably because 1) his dad wanted ATN 2) his dad told him he wouldn't make it at pierce and belongs at ATN 3) he is, somehow, the most rational of the siblings right now????

speaking of rational: how are we feeling about the shiv/mattson potential here? i honestly have zero objections.

shiv is like fuck yeah, sell ATN, that shit is toxic.

agreed, but who gave mencken an open line to ATN-meetings? sounds like something logan told cyd to do during one of those late night calls.

"even dad had a line" rings true zero percent. pass.

get rid of atn. word is, they don't even have tucker carlson anymore? just keep a sweater, much less racist.

we get some important leo dicap representation:

and greg is the bringer of all that is exposition, telling us there is a kill list with 8 to 9 names, ever evolving.

now, as most readers of these recaps would know, i would like to avoid spending any time on greg whatsoever (made even more poignant by the recent rumors about nick), however, this must be one of the best exchanges of dialogue ever made:

greg: da fam shiv: da fuck

that's all.

tom tells the swedes that americans don't care about the rest of the world and it's funny because it's true.

and alex being like "you're ALL related?!"

i see you, succession writers, i see you.

mattson calls waystar a parts shop and has a good take on right wing media:

"i dont think news for angry, old men works"

instead, he opts for bloomberg grey: simple, cheap, huge, ikea'd to fuck. i do love ikea.

he calls the sibs a tribute band which is harsh. even for a scandi, it's fucking harsh.

anyway, SAUNA! SAUNA! SAUNA!

GERRI. IN. SAUNA! (chant with me)

i will never forget what the succession writers took from me.

krank out here just chilling.

i've never shipped anyone more.

we are introduced to ebba. i can tell i'd have more to say on this in any other situation, but it just feels weird (all norwegian know each other, i guess).

anyone else here for the shiv/mattson dynamic?

i'm sorry, i kind of ship it????

ken wants to tank the deal and roman immediately calls him out on his destructive bullshit:

and then immediately caves.

"i think we are good at running the ship" they say after doing it for approximately 24 hours.

i wish i had their confidence.

also, pinky can't dance, according to ken, so they keep shiv out. meanwhile, she gets cozy with lukas, who asks her about her marriage (bad) and tells her he sends liters of blood to ebba (also bad).

shiv shows us why she is paid the big bucks for political advice:

we don't see the end of their night, so i'm just going to assume they fucked. because she's worth it.

also, talking up gerri and karolina? girlies stick together<3

big bi vibes here. huge. idc if she's pregnant and drinking.

meanwhile, the CE-bros use greg to leak that the negotiations are souring. why would you trust greg with anything?

in an attempt to fuck the deal, the CE-bros show a terrible film to the swedish team, as if being scandi doesn't mean you've sat through enough terrible cinema already....

we get the strangest fight in tv history:

lol @ us for thinking this was an important moment for the two of them and then it's a fight about white sneakers and fat earlobes.

i sure hope shiv fucked lukas.

roman receives a photo of his dead dad and it doesn't really put him in the right place to negotiate with mattson:

ouch.

leave it to kieran to make an emmy-worthy speech across from alex skarsgaard peeing.

the plan was: tank the deal, but in a subtle way. what they did: try and tank the deal, but in a not very subtle way. did the deal tank: no.

i hope you understand.

the question is, if a deal collapses in the woods and no one hears it, is it a SEC violation?

mattson ends up offering 192 per share. karl jizzes his pants.

shiv gives the little spelunker tom a lil treat, telling him to fire cyd.

then she asks him out?

and ignores him again because she is taking a call from mattson?

idk my dudes, but i'm into this shiv comeback.

mattson seems happy and flirty and i sure as shit hope this goes somewhere.

as long as it doesn't involve liters of frozen blood.

i have a feeling it will be all good vibes until he learns about her pregnancy. there's always something rotten in the state of denmark (or norway, or sweden, but it's all the same).

the waystar-team receives the kill list after the offer and it's very stressful for a few people who made themselves suffer through a session in the sauna:

not on the kill list: karolina gerri tom because shiv fucking did the thing!!

oh, and karl and frank are on the kill list, but i think they are just fine.

maybe the real treasure was the compression socks we made along the way.

[padfootastic]

Hey padfootastic,

Was scrolling through hp posts and saw a post where people were fighting over Remus situation. So just wanted to know your opinion bout it. Do you think Remus could have done better in PoA? He was a professor, responsible for the safety of others.

No matter how much I love Sirius but at that time he wasn't innocent in others mind, so hiding a big detail that could have affected the whole situation, hell, had Sirius really had been behind harry, he would have been dead cause our little innocent Remus here thought that it was a good idea to not tell them how Sirius had all the resources at his disposal. How easy it was for him to sneak into Hogwarts and harm harry and others.

It really was dangerous and well indirectly he did prove Snape right no? What do you think could have happened had Remus had guts to tell Dumbledore about Sirius being an animagus?

On the other side, oh man! I can imagine Sirius being all furious and depressed at the same time. He'd need to go for another plan, he'd think that now he won't be able to even see Harry easily and many more difficulties. Ugh

Imagine the angst after after innocence thing, Sirius letting go any single drop of love he might have had for Remus and treating him like a any other person. No different. Remus hating himself more and more and Sirius just. Not. Giving a. Single. eff. About the whole damn thing. I cant-

Please tell me what you think bout the whole situation.

yoooooo

i love this lol people asking me for my remus opinions never gets old bc i have endless salt to provide. i will never not be annoyed by that cretin.

okay so. PoA. i don’t often focus on that part of his whole arc (which is, funnily enough, one of the only concessions to remus’ ‘flaws’ that i’ve seen the remus fans give lol) but it’s honestly so??? like it’s literally one of the best examples we have of how self preservation is literally built into his core. iirc he doesn’t do it bc he’s afraid of how dumbledore would perceive him? doesn’t want him to know how they (he) broke his trust? and he’s willing to damn an entire school of students PLUS his best friends son to an alleged mass murderer for it. he will have that on his conscience rather than self introspection a bit and get thru the hard part.

i’ve seen people call him brave for a variety of reasons which all begin and end w his lycanthropy but i’m gonna be honest, he’s one of the most cowardly characters in the series in my opinion. every single time he has to make an active decision that might compromise his sense of self/perception or even just his peace of mind, he backs off. retreats. runs the fuck away. attacks outward. doesn’t take responsibility.

i think snape was both right, in that remus was helping sirius but wrong, because it wasn’t out of any friendship or responsibility. it was just a way to save face for himself. also probably him not wanting to confront any difficult feelings or memories.

wrt if he had told dumbledore? man idek. i literally can’t imagine it and surprisingly, haven’t read any fics exploring that option either 🤔 sus, that. also very telling lol maybe tightened security? disappointed dumbles? i cant see any major changes tho bc even sirius as a grim was pretty well hidden except maybe anti animagus wards if those r a thing?

also yes!!! i think sirius should be allowed to be angry and disappointed more often. he should be spitting mad about the fact that not only did remus not care a lick about harry, he also gave up so easily on sirius. i think he should be allowed that space.

[vtforpedro]

long life update - TWs in tags

It feels like it's been ages. I'm so exhausted and in a lot of physical pain. Going on two months of it being the worst it's been right after a couple of months of the best it's been. Chronic pain + grief + trying to get help from doctors who should have their licenses revoked + dealing with a shit relationship with my mom + a good, decades-long friendship ending + the ongoing disability process with the SSA + LAW FIRMS.

I'm so fucking tired. I don't remember if I updated that the appeals council decided not to review my case because the 'judge followed the law' except that he didn't. So, as it turns out, my original attorney (and he did not tell me this) before he left, wrote that if they denied me, it should go to federal district court.

I'm now working with a NY law firm to take my case to federal court because my current law firm believes it has merit, and I guess they do, too. That's how fucked the decision was, and I'm glad my initial reaction of bewilderment and anger was spot on lol

The good news is, it should only take another year! ._.

My neurologist is the worst doctor I have ever come across and I'm quite literally stuck with him with nowhere else to go. I wish him upon no one. I'm so tired of calling the SSA, getting documents to them, signing things for law firms, contacting law firms, getting no responses, and contacting them all over and over again. I am in incredible physical pain, like this actively makes my neuro stuff worse. Everything makes it worse. I have autonomic testing in a few days, and idk if I'll get through it b/c I have to stop the meds that keep me out of the ER two days prior, and it scares me.

My relationship with my mom is fractured and I don't feel like family therapy is actually helping. I had to end a friendship with someone I love and care very much about but who was growing too comfortable mistreating me and I was giving them too many passes 😞 I've known them for the better part of two decades.

It's been over seven months since my cat Isis died. I don't know how. It feels like she was here just yesterday. Yet, all the nights I've sat and talked to her and wept are all too real. I miss her more than I can say. She was my soul cat. I keep thinking about tomorrow and how she'd be so nosy getting into EVERYthing when gifts are opened at Christmas. Having to stop her, move her, laugh because she was just so n o s y and it was hilarious. And she's not gonna be here for that ever again.

I'm having a really fucking hard time tonight. It's just hitting me how god-awful this year has been and how I have a bad week to look forward to before even getting to the new year lmao I have to stop taking so many of my medications 48hrs before 1.5-2hrs of testing to see if we can find out Yet Another Thing Wrong With Me but knowing my luck it'll be 'no findings' and the mystery of why my core body temp plummets to 93.9 in the blink of an eye won't be solved until I have suffered juuuuust enough.

It never ends. Never. I want to give up. I'm so tired of doing this. I don't want to anymore. It never. fucking. ends.

I absolutely cannot say it's all been bad, though. I've met incredible, warm, welcoming, giving, kind people this year. Y'all have helped me more than you know and I'm so so so lucky to be able to call you my friends. This year has sucked for so many of us, but I want to say I'm proud of you, and I love you all very much.

My fic is gonna be printed in a hardcover zine early next year. I participated in a Big Bang for the first time and that'll also go out early next year. I'm hosting a tiny event in my tiny fandom server that I'm super excited about. I have a raffle prize to write (bagginshield !!!! SO EXCITED to revisit the og otp) and a Valentine's gift to write for another fandom.

I posted 401,000 words this year and wrote many more unfinished wips, plus a long one (90k) that I am very invested in finishing.

I painted and drew so much this year. I improved a lot, too! I got a couple of portraits printed from inprnt to see how they looked, and it was MY art, and they were GORGEOUS. I thought I would hate seeing my art professionally printed, but no! I almost cried. They looked so lovely.

My cat Lilly had health issues almost immediately following Isis's passing, but she is doing so well right now. She's blossomed into another cat, and while she's not my constant companion, she is with me so much more than she used to be. When she walks onto my desk I am to stop everything and hold her like baby in my arms until she decides that's enough (or I really need to move) lmaaao she's such a goober. My heart cat. <3

I'm not doing well right now--my MH is bad. Especially tonight. But it felt good to write the good things.

I'm sorry for my lack of replies and kinda disappearing. I'm running on fumes. I hope next year will bring physical relief so emotional relief can happen.

For those of you facing difficulties of any kind, I am holding your hand in spirit.

[ostewell]

hi. sorry not sorry for posting undertale crossover aus in 2024 but i cannot stop thinking abt this au (im putting 90% of it under the cut LOL)

anyw. malevolent undertale au. <3

(y'all are free to disagree with me abt any of these decisions, some of them were made purely because i thought they'd be funny . my ass is not taking this au seriously /silly)

uhhhhh anyw character equivalents + notes (note: most ppl are their undertale equivalents' species <3)

frisk: arthur - i feel this speaks for itself. protagonist 👍 - bandage equivalent is a necktie, stick equivalent is a broken gun (unlike the gun in hotland, his gun literally cant work at all LMAO the most he can do is pistol whip if he needs to) - he's still an adult btw bc . well . ⬇

chara: faroe - yeah <3 - older than how old we hc faroe to have been (~4), closer to ~8 - pacifist arthur is just trying to figure out what happened to her, genocide is trying to get revenge

flowey/asriel: john - flowey john is a sentient book that flips open, a plume of smoke puffing out and yellow eyes appearing - anyw thought he'd be fitting here for like . idk . it makes sense to me LOL - asriel john btw is also an adult (probably younger than arthur, but not by much LOL) - less of a brother figure to faroe and more of a. weird uncle/father-Ish figure?? idk GLJKSHFLJHSF

toriel: oscar - former clergyman turned advisor to the king <3 - fairly close to the king? at least closer than the king expected him to get (not romantic/sexual)

sans: noel - one of the "thought itd be funny"s but also kinda fitting <3

papyrus: butcher - DEFINITELY a "thought it'd be funny" (papyrus 🤝 butcher: die via head remova💥) - more fits his malevolent personality than papyrus's . by a long shot (but reading papyrus lines in the butcher's voice is fucking hilarious) - not related to noel. just 2 guys living together. for no reason. hope this helps <3 /silly

undyne: yellow - mostly thought itd be fitting 👍 also i can imagine him doing undyne's speech well - HATES being asked if he's related to the king (bc they sound uncannily similar) . /SILLY

alphys: larson - kinda thought itd be fitting mostly thought itd be funny - mew mew kissie cutie equivalent is literally just malevolent btw. (the characters have their undertale counterparts' names instead LOL). he found cds for it in the dump. he's alphys-level obsessed w/ it

mettaton: kayne - tell me he wouldnt. Tell me he wouldnt. /silly - imagine the cooking show . imagine oh my love . Imagine Mettaton Ex . - mtt equivalent keeps the hot pink knee-high heels bc i said so <3 - arthur, seeing mtt ex kayne: larson do you have anything you'd like to share with the class? (larson: )

asgore: the king in yellow - "king in yellow" is more formal, most ppl just call him hastur - pretty good king, but tends to seem cold and unaffectionate . very few people know - hired oscar to help get people's actual opinions on what sorts of things he should do bc. ppl were too nervous to go to him LOL - still a boss monster, but not goatlike! he's still a tentacle creature thing GLKJSHD <3 - created john via asexual reproduction <3 (he's aroace . to me :3)

i dont have anyone for blooky atm... i think marie as muffet would be silly tho GLKJSHFL :3