#also like hopefully its obvious but this was clearly a joke and i am making no statements on nonbinary/trans people in this post

[erisisthefairest]

Picture this: me, a trans man, at an afterparty 5:30 am Monday morning solely because I was woken up by it coming into my apartment and wasn't going to be able to fall back asleep before I had to get up for work anyway.

So this nonbinary person and this trans woman start having a whole discourse with each other on nonbinary vs trans people and at one point the doll is like "i feel like trans men never talk about it" and I'm like "i just woke up 😭😭"

[zahri-melitor]

New(ish) Comics

Batman #154: Look, I don't hate this story, but did we really need another round of Thomas 'Cheater' Wayne? Especially Dr Thomas MD But Can't Handle Contraception Wayne? Been here. Done that. Bane Half-Brothers was funnier. Hopefully this is superior to every time Tommy Jr appears.

Absolute Superman #1: I think I rank this ahead of Absolute Batman but not as good as Absolute Wonder Woman. It's an interesting approach. It's very in your face and not bothering with subtlety in the analogies.

I will agree I am fond of the trend of Live Mothers With Their Sons in these stories, even if I know Lara's about to get whomped by the plot. Loved fix-it engineer Lara who wanted to be an astronaut and got washed out for having Wrong Political Views (age 9).

Action Comics #1074: in contrast, Lara in this is a 1950s cipher, literally standing there holding the baby. It's is such sharp contrast compared to Absolute Superman, especially as I read them back to back.

Aside from that, I think the Clark main plot finally picked up its pace a bit, the Kenan and Kon plot got a bit explainy but remains fun, and Kara is having a very bad time over in her plot.

Birds of Prey #15: Delighted by Cass being a menace here. Really happy we got to spend a little more time getting inside Sin's head. And Grace and Onyx looking at each other and trying to work out how to fight Barda to let her let off steam without anyone getting massively injured was so funny: they're both ripped in this comic, but Barda is, well, Big Barda.

Batgirl #1: As was generally expected, this is heavily leaning on Batgirl 2000. Interestingly as far as I am concerned, it is retaining Batman & Robin Eternal and working on twisting the word 'Orphan' to have multiple meanings! Which I've commented on before: Orphan as a name and a word has a lot of implications for Cass to be unpacked, and not all those implications are obvious on the surface.

I'm interested to see more of how they play this - it's a different approach to Cass's internal monologue and body reading skills.

As far as Shiva goes: they definitely seem to have sat down and tried to find a midpoint between preboot Shiva in Batgirl 2000 and Rebirth Shiva in say Batman and the Outsiders 2019 (both are definite influences on this).

Shazam! #17: Love the Hephaestus design. Feeling sorry for Freddy, though I liked that the whole situation is framed not as 'going evil' but as a test of strength of mind. And given the uneven power split in the family right now, externalising that jealousy makes sense.

Plastic Man No More! #2-3: caught up with Plas. Was reminded I don't actually particularly enjoy him as a character. As a set of stories focusing on treating Eel as more than just a joke character and interrogating his interiority they're doing a lot; I guess some of it is I simply don't really feel attached to him, and I'm cheering Luke O'Brian on to never talk to his dad again.

Also very much reminded these are Black Label, between the gruesome body horror, the plot, the number of character deaths and the fact Tim's running around as a Titans lieutenant checking on members.

I think these are quite good comics. I'm just not emotionally attached to Eel and these aren't managing to get me over the hump.

Batman/Santa Claus: Silent Knight Returns #2: and over here in the 2024 DC Santa read along, we scored a Jason Blood telling tales of Camelot! Don't know where Nimue was - she clearly managed to sidestep this drama and reminding Jason she has very different memories of the period.

Mera also kicked absolute arse and weaponised her attackers prejudices in a satisfying manner.

As a marker: John Stewart is in this title, but he's on the JL team up that are currently trapped and don't have Santa with them. This is important because...

DC'S Batman Smells, Robin Laid an Egg #1:

Santa's Oath: this is a story about Mrs Claus driving the sleigh and being a Blue Lantern, while John Stewart is asking if Santa really exists. We covered this, John! Extensively! In the DC Santa read along last year! He's real! And not only is he real this story is suggesting he's 'busy' in a way that makes me think it wants to align canonically with Silent Knight Returns, except for the fact, John, you are currently trapped in that story, and you're undoubtedly about to MEET Santa in it by the end of it.

In terms of Blue Lanterns, if anyone is going to be one, I don't hate putting it on the Clauses.

Also add this one to the tally of Real Santa stories, even if it is 'Carol' Claus.

Secret Santa: Happy Christmas to me personally, because the 2008 Secret Six lineup are currently exchanging presents and it includes hilarious cuddly Bane musing on everyone's histories.

This is amazing. I only wish Floyd and Thomas had got more banter in it. And it wasn't even written by Simone - dare I dream of another Secret Six run?

Ghosts of Christmas Present: John Constantine gets trapped in a Hallmark Movie via Hell. This is slight and underuses Constantine.

It's a Criminal Life: ...Joker gets It's a Wonderful Lifed with a ghost dead Robin!Jason. It's deeply ridiculous.

Deadman Walking: it's a Christmas mining disaster story! Ahhh, Deadman comics. Honestly a bit too earnest and instructive on how to dig people out of collapsed mines.

Silent Nite: oh the art on this one is good (Francavilla). Silent, period piece for Dr Mid-Nite set in 1941. The direction of the story is obvious from about the second page but still well told.

The Perfect Gift: Ben Turner and Mari McCabe try to buy each other Christmas presents story. Mari massively overthinks things. Ben apparently managed some serenity from the O-Sensei and just got Mari something straightforward. Donna plays wingwoman.

O Glowy Night: The art is fun in this and the concept (Clark can't stop radiating a sunny glow). I sighed at the villain.

Honestly I enjoyed this mix. Lots of characters who mostly get back ups, from various corners of DC.

The Warlord #75: this week in Skartaris we reach an anniversary issue and with it...the return of Graemore, Tara's old childhood friend who likes trying to steal her away from Travis (via such seduction methods like 'not wandering off into the wilderness to kill things without returning for months on end' and 'appearing at meals' and 'asking Tara about her feelings').

Travis and Tara actually discuss the fact Travis is never in Shamballah for more than 5 minutes at a time and that she's tired of it.

In the Ancient Atlantean artefacts line of story, we find out that the USAF identity card thing Travis found was from the 23rd century, yet left with all the other materials of the ancients. COULD IT BE MORE TIME TRAVEL? (because this story doesn't have enough as it is). I feel sorry for whatever poor fool got trapped back in Wizard World and had to live out his days there to get this stuff over to the Ancient Atlanteans.

(Also uh the New Atlanteans try to invade Shamballah and Travis ends up punching Tara to carry her as they try to escape so she won't try to make a heroic last stand. Which. Certainly a thing that happened here)

[alrightrandy]

new year, new plans

what's this? a geniune alrightrandy blog post that isn't just random slop? …finally.

all jokes aside, i'm well aware that i haven't necessarily been ultilizing this site – as well as other platforms im on, as much as i wanted to. however, considering the new year has just begun i believe it's time to make some form of change around here.

i just want to preface this by saying that, all through out last year, i've ran myself into some personal turmoil that led me to essentially lack any sort of focus to work on any hobbies. it's hard to explain, i feel like i have done a lot but at the same time i clearly didn't have much creative output as much as i wanted to. and again, it didn't help that i was also juggling with stuff in my personal life too.

i guess the point i'm trying to make across here is that, i haven't properly found a right balance for myself, both creatively and irl-wise. and i certainly didn't have a proper sense of direction either… but i'm hoping to change that this year!

through out the end of 2023 up until the mid january, i've went through a pretty prolific event that kind of sparked a slew of motivation and plans to really get myself back.

in summary, around the holidays a phone of mine completely bricked itself for some random reason, making it practically inaccessible for me to use. and keep in mind, i'm still saving up to get myself a laptop, so i really had no other personal devices besides that phone.

thankfully, i did manage to get a new one – however, the point is that me being phone-less for a brief moment was very "humbling" for me. not only it was the only device for communication and having a creative outlet, but it just goes to show nothing should be taken for granted. ANYTHING can be lost in a matter of seconds, a simple reminder that i really needed to get myself together.

and with that, everything brings me to here. i've somewhat finally came up with a plan to hopefully boost some motivation within me, and also have a better commitment to my creative output.

to get the obvious stuff out of the way, in reguards of my youtube channel – as well as anything reguarding about dj'ing and music. i am going to try my best to put a heavier focus on these since its something i'm still a complete beginner at. it's a new hobby i've recently picked up, and it only makes sense for me to try to lean onto it a bit more. matter in fact...

i just recently put out something onto my channel!

i'm going try to put out at least one mini mix on a monthly (or bi-monthly) basis. hopefully it will not only expand my portfolio as a dj, but i geniunely think this could help with my issues with commiting to something. plus, i think it would definitely bring in some life to my channel since i still have no clue what direction i want to take it in.

don't get it twisted, i still want to experiment with all sorts of different types of videos. however, i can't make any promises if any of it will reach the light of day. at least with these mini mixes, they will hopefully still appear consistently even if i have nothing else to upload. idk, i think its a decent enough idea to sink time into.

now, reguarding everything about creating artwork and ultilizing my platforms. it's still somewhat uncertain, however if you checked my pinned post i have recently updated it with new sites you can check me out on!

but in short, i will also try to branch out more and maybe even network myself to finding ppl / communities. and along the way, i will also try to get back into creating art since i really have been putting that on the back burner. again, no promises but i have been putting some thought into it! (i'm looking at you Newgrounds and Bluesky…)

i'm reaching my text limit, so this is all i have for now. i'll catch you guys on the flipside, i really do hope i do better this year. knock me out if this post ages horribly lol

happy 2024!

~🐇

[batsplat]

like the IMPLICATION is clearly that valentino was only polite after qatar 2007 BECAUSE he dismissed casey. and the obvious follow up implication would be that valentino got less polite once he started seeing casey as a threat. let's go to the archives and quickly assess how they interacted immediately after casey beat valentino. just a quick assortment. just to check

qatar 2007, very cute, symbolism goes brr, look at casey's big smile. this one got a good review from casey in his autobiography, valentino even got the "polite" shout-out, so I suppose it's a good baseline to compare future interactions to

shanghai 2007, casey's third win in four races. I'm not including any champagne spray photos because that feels a bit cheap and easy but let the record reflect that valentino really went after him with that champagne. and, look, they chatted on the podium

catalunya 2007, obviously THE big dramatic duel casey won against valentino, by then at the very VERY latest it was clear to everyone what an absolute menace casey was going to be. here, have some horrendous quality screenshots of them shaking hands on the cooldown lap - valentino also kinda shakes casey's arm around a bit like he does sometimes for emphasis. television feed fails dramatcally in its job by only giving us this very distant shot of them shaking hands and talking a bit in parc fermé so like. no way to do a vibe check on that. seems friendly enough. plus them on the podium

phillip island 2007, casey's first home win and circa his millionth win that season, by which point casey is already not happy with valentino's behaviour towards him. we've got a shake of the hands that's not really visible on camera due to the angle, followed by a classic chest pat. then there's them chatting on the way to the podium and valentino making... some kind of joke with a bit of body language I am completely unable to parse. he looks like he's suggesting throwing himself off the balcony, which I imagine isn't the case but, look. idk

donington 2008, already included above (the photo with valentino's arm around casey's shoulder) and discussed more here - worrying race from valentino's pov in that it's a proper return to 2007 form for casey. about as fast as you can do a handshake given they're both barely off the bike

sachsenring 2008, casey's third consecutive win, very much the time to start sounding the alarms for valentino as it looks like this title might slip away from him. now, obviously what valentino does in response to this threat is not something casey is a big fan of, but after the race at sachsenring they do manage to keep things cordial at least

mugello 2009, casey's the championship leader and has just taken the win at valentino's beloved home circuit, which valentino had won at since 2002. does this count as polite

phillip island 2009, valentino challenges casey for the win for most of the race but can't ever quite get past him. they hug in parc fermé feat. a bit of a helmet caress and are again perfectly civil on the podium

sachsenring 2010, can't include any parc fermé photos since the fight was for third place - but crucially they did shake hands and also valentino like? almost poked casey's eye out? at a time when their relationship was tonally going off the cliff edge in the media

indianapolis 2011, mostly just included for the curio value given they were actively feuding feuding each other by this point and valentino doesn't actually have any good reason to be shaking casey's hand (he was decidedly not on the podium and had been struggling with a gearbox problem that meant he was constantly somehow on neutral, almost retired a few times... like you'd expect him to be in a horrendous mood really)

could include more examples but hopefully this should suffice. the point isn't that valentino didn't change his tone towards casey or that relations between them didn't get chillier or any of that - it's that it's just extremely casey to retroactively read valentino being polite to him at qatar 2007 as valentino being condescending due to how little he rated him. buddy, he's polite to you when you win races!! consistently so! valentino has plenty of ways of being a dick to his rivals, but 'being a sore loser right after losing a race to them' is categorically NOT one of them. it's just not his approach at all! but as ever, casey is attempting to reckon with the mismatch between character and person, almost as if he'd prefer to simplify things in his mind. always ready to read malice into everything and everyone around him, rarely more so than when dealing with valentino

while valentino's civility to casey can be read as part of a deliberate approach to keep the conflict between them fairly muted for as long as possible, it's also a bit of a case of... well, if you're primed to read everything your competitor does as mind games, then everything they do will look an awful lot like mind games. like casey thinking valentino was deliberately hiding what tyre compound he was racing with when bridgestone had run out of paint. and of course, if you need any more evidence that casey sometimes has a bit of an odd recollection of his rivalry with valentino - look no further than the blood red bike casey remembered being "covered" in yellow. even the idea that valentino was all that dismissive of casey before casey started winning everything is... well I can't find any suggestion of it, and also feels like it actively clashes with casey Heavily Implying that valentino blocked him from yamaha. casey also believes that valentino put dodgy moves on him in practise and races in 2006 - you might put dodgy moves on someone in races for the hell of it, but doing that in practise to a rookie essentially amounts to a form of hazing, right. this is not the behaviour of someone who doesn't rate the talented new kid on the block... but that's how casey seems to remember it

it is SO notable for how much of that rivalry they were interpersonally warm with each other, because it's such a contrast to valentino's other feuds... tells you a lot, not least that casey's emotional investment in that rivalry was considerably more pronounced. casey is the one documenting the slights, casey is the one who does not forgive and forget, casey is the one who is most willing to escalate the verbal hostilities. so, yes, going by the evidence available, I reckon casey was absolutely overthinking a lot of valentino's behaviour towards him. including his quite frankly undeniable habit of consistently leaning towards casey on podiums. let's discuss

[watchmegetobsessed]

Crushing - Harry Styles

a/n: just a little something that was inspired by a tiktok and @pastequeharry​ !

pairing: Harry X Famous!Reader

word count: 2.2k

masterlist

“Welcome back, I hope has everyone returned from our little break because we are playing a fun little game with Y/N, who by the way won a Grammy award for best new artist this weekend, so congratulations on that!”

Ellen smiles at you widely as she claps along with the audience and you’re just smiling shyly, still not quite used to the sound of it.

“Thank you,” you nod looking around.

“Okay, we are going to play a round of who’d you rather. Are you familiar with the game?” she asks you.

“Yes, I’ve seen others play it before.”

“Great. For those who don’t know the game, two people will show up on the screen and Y/N will have to choose one. Whoever she chooses will come with us to the next round and at the end we’ll know who is her ultimate crush.”

“Ah man,” you huff, feeling a little nervous about who they are gonna show you and the audience laughs at your reaction as your fingers dig into the armrest of the armchair you’re sitting comfortably in.

“Are you ready?” Ellen questions with a smile that tells you just how much she is enjoying this.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be, but let’s get started,” you chuckle nervously.

“Okay, let’s see our first pair,” she starts and two pictures show up on the big screen and on the smaller one at the front of the stage so you don’t have to crane your neck. “So we have Zendaya and Tom Holland. Who are you choosing?”

“You really had to start with two of my biggest Marvel crushes?!” you whine and the audience starts laughing again as you chew on your bottom lip, trying to decide. “I love them both, but I’m gonna have to go with Zendaya, because in height, we would be better. I’m sorry Tom, I still love you!” you declare, looking around all cameras, hoping they all got your confession.

“Alright. So now we’ll keep Zendaya and move on to the next person, who is… Harry Styles. Zendaya or Harry Styles?”

The blood rushes out of your face as you see a picture of Harry, memories of the two of you meeting at the award show in the weekend flooding back to your mind. Harry has been a crush of yours since probably forever. You’ve been a fan of his since his One Direction days and your career started to take off sometime around the time he started his solo career, only difference is that it took you a little longer to earn yourself a name in the industry. But this weekend you finally met him for the first time, in real life, without you just watching him on the stage with four other men.

You spotted him at the area that led to the red carpet, he was about to step out when his eyes laid on you and though he was wearing a mask, you still knew he was smiling from the little wrinkles in the corners of his eyes. Your breath caught in your throat, stopping in your track as you were holding up your gown so you wouldn’t trip and fall with all the cameras around.

“Y/N! Hi!” he greeted you stepping closer, as if the two of you were old friends.

“Hi!” you managed to speak up, feeling completely starstruck.

“Love the gown! You look wonderful!” he complimented you and you could feel your cheeks heating up so fast.

“Oh, thank you, but I think you’re stealing the show with the boas,” you chuckled making him laugh as well.

“Thank you. Congrats on the nomination, I really hope you win by the way.”

“You do?”

“Of course. Listened to the album, it’s really good,” he nodded and your heart skipped a beat. Harry Styles listened to your album and he liked it? This must be Heaven, but when did you die?

“Thank you so much! I hope you win too, though your chances are better with your three nominations,” you joked making him laugh again.

“Yeah, just a little,” he nodded. “Here, let me help you.” He offered you his arm helping you step up the few steps that lead to the area where the red carpet photos were taken and you were thankful for the help, though you could already hear all the camera’s clicking in your way and you knew the photos would be all over the internet by the next day.

You only met one more time during the evening and you could only congratulate to each other on the wins before you both were snatched away, but you still play your conversation with him in your head before you go to bed in the evening.

“Um, Zendaya is everything but I’m gonna play this game honestly so I’ll choose Harry.”

The audience starts cheering and clapping at the decision as Ellen smirks at you, nodding along.

“No need to be shy, we all have a crush on Harry probably,” she jokes making you laugh. “Okay, next up we have… Harry Styles and The Weeknd.”

“I’m gonna stick to Harry,” you answer probably a little too fast, but if you’re being honest, they can’t show you anyone at this point who would beat Harry.

“Harry stays, next we have Harry and… Florence Pugh.”

“You guys made sure to make it hard for me!” you chuckle staring at the screen. “But I’m still gonna stick to Harry, though I love them both.”

“Alright, for the next round we have Harry Styles and Niall Horan.”

“I’m upset, because as a One Direction fan, I should not be forced to choose between them,” you point at Ellen, giving her a hard look which the audience finds quite hilarious.

“I’m sure you had ranked them before, don’t be shy,” she smirks and you sigh rolling your eyes.

“Okay, no offence to anyone but Harry stays. Sorry Niall, I still love you though,” you add with a smile.

“Harry is in a winning streak, it seems. Okay, let’s see his next opponent. Harry against Chris Evans.”

“Harry,” you answer with a sigh, crossing your legs, knowing well you will not choose anyone over Harry.

“Fast answer, great. Harry Styles or Ariana Grande.”

“Love Ariana, she’s a queen, but Harry,” you answer with a smile, the audience enjoying your obsession over Harry Styles and at this point you are not even trying to hide it.

“Harry Styles or Henry Cavill?”

“Harry,” you answer right away.

Henry’s picture disappears and Harry’s moves to the middle as the game comes to its end.

“Seems like we have a winner here. Harry Styles beat everyone!” Ellen chuckles as you glance at the big screen, blushing a little, but you are hoping your makeup is covering it well.

“You said it yourself, everyone has a crush on him,” you shrug, trying to play it cool.

“Yes, but not everyone was helped out by him,” she smirks as a photo of the two of you appears on the screen from last weekend and you cover your face with your hands as the audience goes wild.

“He is a gentleman,” you sigh dreamily.

“He really is and I have to say that the two of you look great together.”

“Oh stop it,” you chuckle, playing it over a little, just to make it less obvious how giddy even the thought makes you.

“Well, now we know that he is your number one choice, hopefully he’ll take the next step,” Ellen chuckles before moving on and asking you a few more questions as part of your appearance on the show.

Weeks go by and you kind of forget about the whole interview. It blows up the next few days, but nothing really happens, people just get excited that you are crushing on Harry just like everyone else, but it dies down pretty quickly.

You barely recovered from your Grammy win and yet you are already marching towards another milestone in your career. None other than Gucci asked you to be part of their new campaign in an amazing photoshoot and you just couldn’t say no, not that you ever even thought about it. After some online meetings and sending emails back and forth the first fitting’s day has finally arrived and you are buzzing!

Heading down to the showroom to go over every outfit they want you to wear for the photos, you can’t wipe the excited grin off your face. Growing up you could only dream about owning anything Gucci, now you are going to be promoting them so it truly is a dream come true.

Arriving you are walked into the showroom that is now filled with racks of clothes and there’s a podium with three mirrors surrounding it for the fitting.

“Y/N! Hi! So nice to finally meet you after all the emails and calls!” Nancy, the creative director of the campaign greets you.

“Nice to meet you too!”

“We are in a little bit of delay, I’m very sorry about that, but we can start in about ten minutes, if that’s alright with you.”

“Oh, no worries. I’m free all day,” you assure her before she thanks your patience and runs off to finish off whatever she was doing before.

Wandering around you take a look at the beautiful clothes on the racks, blown by basically everything you see and you can’t wait to wear the outfits that were meant for you. In the back of the room, a part is closed off for a changing area and you hear the door opening as Nancy walks out first, talking to someone following her behind and when you see the person, you freeze.

Harry Styles walks out, wearing a just a shirt and jeans, looking very casual but still, unbelievably hot. The man could wear a potato sack and still look better than any other men.

“Thank you so much,” he smiles at Nancy before his eyes lay on you, a wide smirk tugging on his lips in realization. “So nice to see a familiar face!” he beams, walking closer before he pulls you in for a short hug that catches you by surprise, but also warms your chest.

“Hi, didn’t expect to see you here, though you are kind of one with the brand at this point,” you tease him making him laugh.

“I am, yeah. I heard that you would be featured in the campaign as well. Amazing choice,” he smirks, glancing over at Nancy who smiles proudly, clearly agreeing with him.

“Y/N, I’ll get the changing room ready for you and we can start in five, alright?” Nancy informs you.

“Yeah, thank you!” You nod in her way and she is already off to do the work, leaving you and Harry alone.

“So, I learned some interesting information the other day,” he hums with a serious face and he got you curious about what it could be.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm, you know, I was watching The Ellen Show and you were on, playing a little game.”

“Oh my God,” you breathe out, already feeling the heat crawling up your neck to your cheeks. Harry smirks down at you, clearly enjoying that he got you so nervous and embarrassed of what happened.

“I wish I knew about your little crush earlier!” he teases you, making your groan.

“And why is that? So you could pull my leg at the Grammy’s when I was already shitting my pants?”

Harry lets out a chuckle shaking his head as he hides his hands in his pockets, his eyes running up and down your figure before they meet with your gaze again.

“No. Because then I wouldn’t have talked myself down from asking for your number.”

You can’t help the stunned reaction that takes over your face at his blunt flirting, your lips part as your eyebrows shoot up while Harry just stares back at you with a sly smirk on his deliciously pink lips.

“Oh, is that so?”

“Yeah, but now that I know that you are crushing on me just like I’m crushing on you, I think it’s time to make the first step. So…” he pulls his phone out and hands it over to you and continues while you type your number in. “I’m not just asking for your number, but I happened to hear that you have nothing else planned for the day, is that true?”

“It is,” you nod, feeling out of breath as you hand him back his phone, your number saved in his contacts.

“Then how about grabbing lunch after your fitting? I happen to have nothing today as well, we should take advantage of it,” he suggests and you can’t push your stunned smile down.

“Sounds good,” you nod, biting into your bottom lip.

“Great. I’ll run some errands while you are here and I’ll be back in about an hour.”

“You could stay here if you want, I don’t mind it,” you tell him, feeling like he is only leaving because he doesn’t want to intrude.

“I would love to, but I really want to see the final outcome of the campaign and not spoil it for myself,” he smirks making you chuckle.

“Alright. Then see you in an hour.”

“Yeah,” he nods with a boyish smirk before turning around and walking out of the showroom.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

[vidalinav]

Stu(died)-Chapter 3

Summary: Cassian takes care of a sick Nesta

Nessian Modern AU-university setting. 

Masterlist, Stu(died) Chapter List 

(Rolls eyes hardcore) I am continuing this fic for literally five people. Smh. 

~

Nesta comes to their tutoring session late and that’s the first thing that tips him off. Already his phone is in his hand ready to call 911. He has Nesta’s number in his phone saved. The first person listed in his text log under Nerd. He can always text or call her. He belongs to The Rat Pack in Nesta’s Snap Chat group, and he knows he can always contact Emerie or Gwyn if something is truly wrong. Yet he dials in 911 and his thumb hovers over the call button.   

If she doesn’t show up in fifteen minutes, Cassian swears he’ll call.  

Nesta’s never late. In fact, she’s annoyingly early. She practically has a stop watch in her hand at all times, counting every minute she waits. When Cassian comes running in five minutes later, as he so often does, panting with some excuse, Nesta doesn’t even bother looking up from her textbook. She merely gestures to the seat, a heavy sigh on her lips, like she’s running out of time to bore him death even as she fascinates him to pieces. 

Her books should already be splayed onto the table, her pencils straight and neatly lined up. Today, the table is empty. 

He’ll give it fifteen minutes and then he’s calling.  

But Nesta shows up before another minute ticks by. She steps out of the elevator wearing that grey polo he’s seen on her a million times. She lugs her way to him, dragging her feet with the weight of those textbooks he’s sure are in her bag. 

She’s wearing a mask, today, and that’s another thing that sends his brain screeching somethings not right here! It covers half of her face, and her eyes look tired from where they peak above the fabric. Cassian doesn’t even bother waiting for her to settle. Already he’s crossing his arms, his brows crinkling with concern and something like irritation. 

How dare she think studying is more important than her health.  

“Go home,” he says as she nears. Nesta only blinks as if as not understanding his words. The fact that she doesn’t immediately argue is enough for him to start gathering his things.  

“What are you doing?” She says as he stuffs his notebook in his bag, “You have an exam in two weeks.” Nesta sets down her own, it slaps at the table with a heavy thump. Cassian can hear the zipper unzipping but not as well as the cough that roars out of her mouth.  

It’s loud and wet, and Nesta pauses as if to get her bearings, covering her mouth with her arm. She coughs and coughs and Cassian lays a hand to his own chest. He can almost feel how much it hurts, how she gasps. 

Cassian shakes his head, “No, I’m taking you home.”  

Nesta’s brows furrow and she gets that look in her eyes. He just knows she’s going to fight him on this. “I--”  

Cassian cuts her off, “please, save your breath. You’re going to make everyone sick.”  

“I’m wearing a mask!” Nesta argues.  

“It’s almost midterms.” Cassian gestures to the other occupants in the library. He sees one person with their hoodie pulled up over their head, clearly sleeping... and moves on to someone else. A group in the corner who’s standing by a whiteboard. “You want to take your chances with sleep deprived students?” 

Nesta seems to think about that. While she does, Cassian zips up her bag and throws it over his shoulder. It’s as heavy as he thought it might be. Briefly, he thinks of making a joke about how she must have stuffed a body in here, but he doesn’t think she’d appreciate it, given how quiet she is.   

Mentally, he starts making a list of everything she needs. Medicine? He’ll get the pills and the syrup, never mind if she scrunches her nose at the taste. He’ll get her soup. Not the canned. Cassian will buy the ingredients. He’s sure he can make something appeasing. Vaguely, he can remember his mom’s recipe. Beef broth and cabbage and squash. Hopefully she can stomach it. Never mind, the salt will be good for her.  

“Hey,” she whines, blinking up at him slowly, “give me my bag.”  

“Have you not heard me? You need to be home lying down. Not here, helping me study. Why on earth did you think this was a good idea? I’m taking you home.”  

Nesta crosses her arms and the intimidation tactic seems ridiculous with her face half covered and her endless sniffling. “You can try, but I’ll just refuse to tell you my apartment number.”  

Cassian scoffs, “I know where you live. I can see your room from the house when you study at night.”   

“Who says that out loud?” Nesta shouts. 

She must be terribly ill if she’s yelling in a library. That’s all he can think as he gestures to the elevator, bags in hand. 

“Never mind that. Let’s go,” Cassian says, walking ahead without her. 

He can’t hear her shuffling though, so he turns back to find Nesta leaning on a chair, holding her stomach. He can already feel himself sighing.   

Cassian rushes back just in time for Nesta to rip off her mask, and move to the closest trashcan. It’s situated under one of the bulletin boards and as Cassian sidles up to her, rubbing at her back and pulling her hair away, he looks to the papers tacked to the board.  

Join the rowing team. Looking for tutors. Research participants wanted.  

He can hear the retching and Cassian reads on. 

Babysitter wanted for professor, transportation needed.

“I haven’t thrown up since middle school,” Nesta says pathetically. She frowns as he hands her his bottle of water. Her nose and cheeks are red and for some reason he thinks of Rudolph, lighting the way for Santa through the storm. 

He feels bad for little Rudolph...

“Now will you let me take you home,” Cassian sighs. He hopes it doesn’t sound like an ‘I told you so’ but she should really be lying down. He lays a hand to her forehead, but she brushes him off, moving towards the bathrooms.  

“I’ll wait right here,” he says, but Nesta moves ahead as if she doesn’t hear him at all. Cassian can’t find it in himself to mind. A sick Nesta is guaranteed to be a stubborn Nesta, he just knows.  

When she gets out, she looks surprised to see him and that’s another look that just proves how sick she must be. It’s a fairly obvious prediction that he’s going to wait next to the girl's bathroom, counting ceiling tiles. It’s a perfectly ‘Cassian with Nesta’ thing to do.  

“You’re skipping class?”   

Nesta coughs again, and she looks perfectly pitiful as she blinks her tired eyes. Cassian can feel his lips frown, and he shifts her bag more securely on his shoulder if only to keep himself from reaching out for her. Already he can feel his hands bunch into fists because he wants to grab her own and squeeze it until she's reassured. He wants to hug her until she feels better.  

But he can’t.  

Cassian lists every action he wants to do. Kiss her forehead where Nesta rubs her hand, because she must have a headache from how sick she is. Put on her favorite movie, so she can fall asleep to its sound. Run to every store, raiding every Walgreens and CVS until he comes back with a pharmacy.  

What might she allow now that she’s sick? Will she let him fuss like he wants to?  

But Nesta rolls her eyes in that haughty way of hers. “You can’t do that.”   

“I can’t do what?” Cassian asks and he wonders if she can read his thoughts. If she studies him so well, reads him like one of her textbooks, memorizing facts and facial features.  

“You can’t skip class,” she argues. “Why am I tutoring you if you’re going to skip class?”  

At the words, all Cassian wants to do is sigh. She’s thinking about attendance at a time like this...   

“Nesta, there is no class more important than you.” 

Her brows crinkle at the center like she’s going to start arguing, but Cassian allows himself one touch. He places his thumb there, between her brows, smoothing out the lines. Nesta rips away, blinking up dazed and all too confused. Cassian would laugh at the look, if he didn’t need the distraction.   

He juts his head to the elevator quickly. “Let’s go. We can walk slow, so don’t overexert yourself.”   

Nesta scrunches up her nose, so cute and red, but she follows him anyway albeit a little petulantly. She holds her hand out for her bag, but Cassian turns toward the doors, pretending not to see.   

“How does me being sick make you bossy?”   

Cassian doesn’t dare to respond. He doesn’t know whether he’ll admit that he wants to take care of her, that’s he’s so worried a knot twists in his stomach, or if he’ll make some joke, he knows will make her mad. Maybe that’s the better option, he thinks. He can handle a mad Nesta. He likes a mad Nesta, but a Nesta who so easily rejects him?   

Cassian doesn’t know about that.   

“You don’t have any classes left this week, right?”   

Nesta coughs into her sleeve before answering. Though she means to sound queenly, she only sounds sick, “you know where I live, and you also know my class schedule... seems suspicious if you ask me.”   

“I’ve known you for two years.” 

“And murder victims are three times more likely to be killed by someone they know." 

Cassian huffs out a laugh, shaking his head, “Do you still go to sleep watching SVU? Or have you switched to Lifetime movies where the babysitters always try to kill the wife?”   

“People should be wary about the people they know,” Nesta shrugs as if that’s answer enough.   

Cassian snorts, “well you don’t have to be wary of me.”   

As the elevator doors open, Cassian gestures for her to go first and Nesta does, but not before crossing her arms.   

“That’s just what a murderer would want me to think.” She squints as if dissecting him, limb by limb. “You kill me, and I’ll haunt you. You won’t be able to sleep at night without thinking of me.” 

Too late, Cassian thinks.  

It’s much too late for that.  

~

Rudolph has the patience of a five-year-old when she’s sick. Cassian learns this fairly quickly when he runs inside a Walgreens on their way to Nesta’s apartment.  

There’s a bench that she can sit on, where she can wait if she feels tired, but no. Nesta decides she needs to run errands. She has an entire basket filled by the time he finds her again. She’s by the greeting cards, holding three open at a time. Cassian huffs with a receipt and medicine in hand.  

“Here,” he says, giving her the cough medicine. “Take some of this.”  

Nesta doesn’t even bother with pouring. He watches as she rips the cap away, taking a swig right out of the bottle, gulping it down.  

“That’s way more than the suggested amount,” he cries, “you can get drunk on this stuff!”  

“Good, maybe I’ll forget this day ever happened.”

Cassian sighs... it seems all he does is sigh when she’s like this. A sick Nesta is a petulant, irritated Nesta with a permanent furrow between her brows. 

“I know you feel sick,” he tries to placate, “but I bet you’d feel a whole lot better if we get you home as soon as we can... so you can lie down and sleep.”  

Nesta only picks up another Halloween card. She ignores his suggestion, laughing under her breath as she reads whatever inane joke is written there. Soon, she’s coughing though, and Cassian reaches for the basket just to stop himself from rubbing a hand down her back, combing his fingers through her hair.  

Stubborn, stubborn, stubborn, his thoughts scream.  

Cassian looks to the contents to distract himself from her watery eyes, and that’s when he notices what she’s grabbed. It seems that while he was in the cold and flu aisle, Nesta was raiding the snacks. 

“What is this?” He gestures to the basket. Two boxes of cereal. Caramel corn. Baked Lay’s and cans of Arizona tea. Cassian takes one and holds it up. “Really Nesta?”  

“What it’s green tea!” she argues, shoving another card back in its slot.   

“This is all... junk,” he tries to explain, but Nesta’s already glowering. 

“Look I don’t question your decisions. You don’t question mine.”  

Cassian gives her a bland look. “You question my decisions all the time. Before we came in here, you literally said ‘why are we going in here, Cassian? Weren’t you supposed to take me home.’ You said that.”

Nesta simply raises her chin, pulling out another card. “I recall no such thing.” 

“Fine,” Cassian grumbles, “if you want to eat yourself to an early grave and ignore everything that could potentially make you feel better than that’s just fine with me.”  

“Good,” she says, putting back the other cards. Nesta settles for a pop-up that sings Monster Mash when she opens it. She sets it in the basket he holds, walking ahead without even looking back. “I’m ready to check out.”  

“Really?” Cassian jokes, mockingly. “Are you sure you raided the candy aisle?” 

Nesta stops in her tracks, peering through the section with printer ink and paper as if she can see the other side. He swears he’d facepalm if he wasn’t carrying all this stuff. 

“You’re right,” she says, nodding. 

“Wait!” Cassian calls. “Where are you going? Nesta!”  

Too late. He can already hear crunching bags. 

The variety packs.  

Cassian sighs, lugging their things to the aisle next door. 

~

“Can I use these vegetables?” Cassian asks, as Nesta shoves open the door to her room. He’s surprised she’s not still by the freezer. When they first get back to her place, she sticks her head in there and he wonders if he should suggest taking her temperature, or if she’s doing it just to show him she’s annoyed.  

Perhaps her ears bleed from the sound of his voice.  

That seems like something Nesta would say.  

“They’re Emerie’s. Why?”

“To make soup,” Cassian explains, rifling through the contents. There’s zucchini and summer squash. Onion, fresh parsley and carrots. Cabbage and lettuce. Fresh fruit. He can make a nice stew out of this.  

Nesta scoffs, “I don’t need soup.”  

She enters her room, shoving the door back behind her until it leaves only a crack.  

“You can leave now,” she yells. “I’m home like you wanted.”  

“Are you lying down?” He asks, crossing his arms sternly though she can’t see him.  

Nesta sighs loudly, “you’re annoying!”  

“Maybe if you got some rest, I’d be less annoying,” Cassian sings brightly.  

He can hear the soft sound of her voice. “Doubt.”  

Cassian shakes his head with a smirk. He opens his snapchat where The Rat Pack is the first on the list, but the group name has changed... to People I Tolerate.

That’s got to be Nesta.  

Cassian laughs under his breath and types. Can I use your vegetables? Making Nesta soup.

Emerie’s bitmoji pops up at the bottom, but the person who texts back first is not Emerie, but Gwyn.  

You’re at our house?

Cassian can almost hear her voice. Stern and cautious. He’s almost certain she doesn’t like him. Gwyn looks at him with even more disdain than Nesta when he's around. That stay away from my friend look.  

He sighs. Yes, Nesta’s sick.  

Gwyn’s quick to respond. I can come home early. I need to drop off a paper, but I can be there in 30.  

Cassian rolls his eyes and types, I’m perfectly capable of taking care of her.  

Nesta’s face pops up. I can take care of myself.  

“No, you can’t!” Cassian yells.  

“Yes, I can!” Nesta yells back, but then she starts coughing again and he can hear her groan in the other room. Cassian raises a brow at her door.  

I’m going to make soup. I’ll make enough for all of you, but can I use stuff from the fridge? I’ll replace it all.  

Emerie’s face pops up and then disappears quickly. He’s about ready to go to the store himself or at least next door to the House, but Emerie’s text appears.  

I have no objections to this.

Cassian smiles in relief, and he’s about to set down his phone when another notification appears. It’s Emerie again.  

And if you make good soup, you can stay indefinitely.  

Cassian sends a winking emoji. Nesta sends back the emoji with the straight mouth and eyes. Before he can frown at what that means, Cassian sees that the group name has changed... to Three’s Company.  

That’s got to be Gwyn.  

Stone cold, Emerie texts back.  

Cassian decides he’s going to ignore that for the moment and focus on the objective at hand.  

Soup.  

Cassian pulls out the vegetables and looks through the cupboards. Emerie, it seems, has all the good spices. He finds the broth packets stored in the back, and he pulls out some beef from the freezer. It’ll need to defrost but he can start the broth now, get the vegetables soft, and brown the beef later. It’ll take a couple of hours anyway.  

Occasionally, he hears a cough as he works. Then a sweet laugh... followed by a cough and a groan. Cassian feels bad for her he does, but he can’t help but find the whole situation amusing. She should be resting and yet she seems to be wide awake.  

Nesta doesn’t come out of her room though. It’s as if he’s not even there, and he takes that time to look over her shared apartment. There are three doors, each with a letter at the front. The N is blue, the E, green, and the G, pink. He doesn’t know how it’s possible to have a living room that looks like all three, but somehow it works. It’s studious and bright. Colorful, but subdued. There are way too many throw pillows and books scattered everywhere, but there’s also a TV with a fireplace under it. He can just imagine Nesta laughing at scary movies. Some slasher fic she’ll watch like she’s taking notes.  

He can imagine Nesta everywhere, in fact.  

This is where she eats. Where she sits. Where she studies. This is where she trips over shoes if they’re not neatly lined up and where she complains about dirty dishes. This is where she cooks... if she does cook. Cassian doesn’t know.  

Maybe he’ll get to find out one day.  

Once the water starts boiling and the meat is in the microwave to defrost, Cassian goes to check how Rudolph is doing.  

He knocks on her door lightly, pushing it open. “Nesta?”  

Cassian’s never seen her room before, say for when she sits by the window with her curtains wide open, and just like then, it seems like an invasion of privacy to do so now. But Nesta’s plopped on top of her bed, tucked beneath her blue comforter, and she sets down her phone when he appears at the door.  

Her whole room is filled with blues and creams, and it looks exactly what he imagines Nesta’s room to look like. The large calendar, an agenda on the desk, bookshelf after bookshelf lining her walls. There are also things he doesn’t know of her yet. Pictures and posters and a.... stuffed lobster? Cassian holds it up.

“Would you stop looking around?” Nesta groans. She has her arm resting over her eyes, and he wonders if it’s because she doesn’t want to see him looking or if she feels that bad that the light is bothering her.

She should be getting some rest, he thinks.  

“Where did you get a stuffed lobster?”

Nesta coughs out her response.

The sound makes Cassian grimace, his chest ache with need, but he doesn’t rush over like he wants to. This is her house, her room... and this is Nesta who doesn’t like to be coddled by anyone.

“It’s a heat pack,” she says at last, after she catches her breath.

“A heat pack?” Cassian looks to the soft red claws that dangle. He’s never seen anything so soft be a heat pack.

“For cramps,” she says as if it’s obvious. Nesta must take his silence to mean ignorance for she lifts onto her elbows, raising a judgmental brow. “Please tell me you know what periods are or am I am going to have to go back to teaching you biology?”

“No,” Cassian draws out, “I know what periods are.”

Nesta mumbles a thank god and Cassian watches as she shifts under the covers, pulling them up until they hover just beneath her mouth.

“Are you cold?” Cassian asks, looking around her room. He spots his burgundy hoodie neatly folded and nearly yanks it from her desk. “Here. Wear my sweatshirt.”

“I just washed it,” Nesta whines, “I was going to give it back to you.”  

Cassian’s confused by the words, but he merely gestures for her to budge up. He’s thankful when she doesn’t argue. He rolls the sweatshirt over her head and Nesta fits her arms through the sleeves.  

“You didn’t have to wash it,” he says, watching as she pats down her hair. If only he could pull it up for her, comb his fingers through it. She could use his scrunchie too, if she wanted.

Nesta rolls her eyes, and he can only imagine what she thinks. He can practically hear the words. Of course, you wouldn’t care about clean clothes.

Her expressions practically give her away--everything she feels and thinks. Cassian wonders if he knows how open she is to the rest of the world. He wonders if she’d hate him if he told her this.

“It was going to smell like me,” she frowns.

Cassian wants to huff out a laugh. That is perfectly fine by him.  

“Stop laughing,” she whines, “I’m being serious.”  

“Yes, you’re being very serious.” He can’t help his smirk as he gazes up at her. He doesn’t even realize he’s on her bed, sitting to the side of her all bunched up in red. Her nose to the fabric. He almost wants to say she looks cute in his hoodie, all sick like that, but he knows she’ll only bite at him, remarking about how he has some weird fetish for sick girls. 

Cassian holds back a laugh as he hears the microwave ding. He needs to turn the meat around, so it doesn’t cook through, but Nesta grips his arm. His head whips towards her and... Nesta’s gazing up at him. Her eyes are a soft blue. Just like her room.  

“You’re warm,” she says. To explain herself, he thinks, and why she holds him as if she doesn't want him to move.   

Cassian’s lips raise lightly, and he places the back of his hand on her forehead. “You must be worse than you’re letting on if you're okay with me being in your bed.”  

Nesta scoffs, “you’re on it. Not in it. I’ll make that distinction very clear.”  

“You can’t be that sick then,” Cassian shrugs, smiling. “If you’re making everything sound like a tutoring session.”  

Her cheeks flush a bright pink and Cassian thinks she must have a fever. He wonders if he should search for an ice pack or make one, so she doesn’t get too hot.  

“Are you tired?” He asks, noting how slowly she blinks. “You did drink a lot of cough syrup.”

“I also took a NyQuil,” she says, closing her eyes.  

Cassian huffs, “remind me to teach you how read warning labels when your fully coherent.”  

He can hear the microwave ding again, and it reminds him of an alarm. Wake up! It seems to say. Being in Nesta’s room does feels like falling asleep. Rather dream-like and hazy. The microwave dings incessantly, but Cassian doesn’t want to wake up just yet. 

Her hand is still on his arm. It’s so much smaller than his and he wants to trace the skin there and see if it’s as soft as it looks. Cassian doesn’t dare look at her, in case she doesn’t just bang together two loud cymbals and tell him to get up and out and away. 

Cassian looks ahead instead, fixing his gaze on the stuffed lobster on her desk.  

“Nesta,” he starts and then swallows. He feels nervous, his hands clammy. “Nesta, I really think you and I... we’d be good together.”  

Cassian takes a breath, and he stares at the lobster as if it’s her face. “We’ve known each other for a long time now and I... I haven’t hid how I feel about you.” His heart is beating way too fast, and he doesn’t feel any freer from speaking the words, but Cassian decides it’s time to rip the Band-Aid off. “I thought maybe... we could try it out. See if you might be comfortable with it. If you might like me... too?”  

He doesn’t know why he words that like a question, but Nesta doesn’t say a word. Cassian looks back, hoping there’s no disgust in baby blue. He doesn’t know what he’d do if she just outright says he’s trash and she’ll never like him. 

But Nesta’s fast asleep.  

Cassian doesn’t bother sighing as he grips her limp hand, setting it on the blanket. He doesn’t bother being disappointed when he tucks the comforter around her. Her cheeks are a lobster-red and he rubs a thumb lightly there, wondering what it would be like to hold her face in his palm and kiss at her nose. Would she complain as he pecked her lips? You’ll get sick Cassian.  

Then we can stay in bed together, Nesta.  

No. Cassian’s not disappointed at all. 

He’ll tuck away his dreams where tomorrow lives. 

Today, he’ll stick to what he’s good at, so Cassian heads to the kitchen to make soup.

~

~ ~

~

~

Mwahahahaahah

~

In case you missed, here’s the stuffed lobster in the flesh.

~

Tagged: 

@arinbelle @my-fan-side @sophilightwood @nestaarcher0n @duskandstarlight @soitsgorgeous @swankii-art-teacher @lordof-bloodshed @thewhelk @daisy-in-danger @highqueenevankhell @lovelynesta @sirendeepity @champanheandluxxury @ladynestaarcheron @moodymelanist @teagoddess99 @spoilersteph @angelic-voice-1997 @bo0kmaster69 @drielecarla @generalnesta @cozycomfyliving08 @confusedfandomslut @dread3r @sv0430​

~

"Why am I still writing this fic?" I say angrily, as I angrily type it in my angry word document.

[sidespromptblog]

What to Do?: Chapter 2

One, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten

Summary: Logan realizing that his first mistake was seeing the other sides as anything other than coworkers. They weren't a family. They didn't even like each other. How had he not realized sooner?

Warnings: General anxiety, hurt/comfort, angst, and hurt feelings. 

Word Count:  1,803

Logan could feel the tug in his gut of the others clearly trying to summon him into the centerpiece of the mindspace. For a split second he felt a jab of fear racing through him as he pondered whether or not he should actually go to them, they wouldn’t be happy about the decision he had decided to make for himself. If anything they’d probably be most cross with him about it, or… or perhaps they’d laugh at him. Say that it was ridiculous that he was trying to appear so professional with all the things that they knew about each other. 

Yeah… they would most definitely try to laugh it off to clear the air, and to make him go back on his decision. To undermine his boundaries, and make him second guess himself when it came to this. 

But he wouldn’t… he couldn’t.

Not about this, and most certainly not now. He had already talked himself into doing this, and he wasn’t going to let his imagination run away with him about it either. 

He had made up his mind. 

“Logan…” He could hear Patton referring to him. 

“Logan.” He could hear Roman talking. 

“Logan..” He could hear Virgil mumbling. 

Logan’s fingers curled into his hands, and he could feel his temper flaring up before he even attempted to stamp it back down. “Shut up!” He snarled to himself, raising his hands to his ears as to block out the sounds of his name that came from inside his head. A part of him felt like sobbing, like curling up in a corner and just admitting defeat so that it would just make it all stop. But he couldn’t do that, and he knew that he couldn’t do that. There was too much work to be done… “Just stop!” 

Logan. Logan. Logan…

Logan!

This could not wait another day, no matter what Logan tried to tell himself it just couldn’t. He needed to set things straight, and get it down with the others so they at least understood where he was on the matter, no matter how much it hurt their feelings. In the end, it would at least make him feel better, and hopefully… hopefully things would at least change then and he’d be listened to. 

Even if it was only a little bit. 

Straightening his back, and forcing his hands back down to his sides Logan rose up in the living room biting his tongue the entire time. He would only have to endure his name in their mouths for just a little bit longer, they might not listen, but at least they would know. And that’s literally all that he needed from them, it didn’t matter if they got upset or refused. 

Because this was for him, not for them. 

“Logan!” Virgil’s head whipped away from Patton and Roman, and to where Logan was standing. “Are you okay?” The anxious side tried to ask it cooly, but everyone could see his hands fidgeting with the loose threading strands of his sleeves. The anxiety he had felt coming off of Logan in waves had all but vanished the moment that he had arrived, and it had done very little to lessen Virgil’s own anxieties about the subject. His gaze seemed to look everywhere but Logan for an instance, before he finally willed himself to look at the logical side.  “You seemed kind of anxious, and we were…” The words that were right on Virgil’s tongue died in an instant upon seeing the look on Logan’s face. 

None of them had exactly gotten a chance to talk to Logan after his whole run in with Remus, but right then and there… Virgil wished that he had been there from the very start. To help Logan, and to help the logical side come to terms with the fact that his schedule hadn’t exactly been followed. 

He wished… he wished that he had done something. 

Because…

Logan didn’t look cold, he didn’t even appear to be disinterested in them like he had in the past when it came to discussing Roman’s daydreams or plans. He just looked…

Well it was weird, but he looked oddly polite. 

Like a stranger waiting for someone to stop talking, so that he could speak his business. 

Virgil swallowed thickly, “Deceit?” He merely asked, looking Logan up and down as if trying to spot any inconsistencies of the other side’s attire. 

There was nothing.

And Logan slowly shook his head, his eyes remaining trained on Virgil steadily. He looked calm, the farthest thing from the side who used to scream falsehood at him and anyone who tried to lie to his face. His hair was a windswept mess, and his clothes even messier. With his tie loosened and the collar to his shirt unbuttoned by a single button. And it was that alone that sent alarm bells off in Virgil’s head, because despite all of that… Logan was here. He was calm, he was collected, and there didn’t seem to be anything wrong with him. 

He looked fine. 

But something was wrong, maybe it was just him but.. there had to be something wrong with Logan. He couldn’t be okay, not by any kind of standards. He knew Logan too well to know that the logical side would never show up to any kind of meeting with them dressed as he was. Logan was far too prideful for that, and he also knew that Roman would most certainly never let him live it down. So… something.. Something had to be wrong here. He couldn’t be okay.

Not after what happened. 

“Logan,” Patton inched forward, a look of clear worry on his face. “You okay bucko? Are you feeling oka-” 

“Logic.”

Patton blinked, hoping that he had misheard what Logan had just said to him. His voice chilly in the kind of way that made his back shiver, even if there wasn’t a single draft to be felt. “What?” He attempted a happy playful smile that wouldn’t betray how he was feeling, when the stoney look on Logan’s face didn’t even  budge for a second he felt it slip right off into a puzzled frown. He was acutely aware of Roman and Virgil watching their interaction with the eyes of a hawk, their eyes were burning the back of his head. He could feel something inside of him tremble with that one word that Logan had spoken to him, and he hoped with everything that he was… that he’d only misheard Logan. With Logan’s firm unbreaking stare,  and the obvious stares from the other two sides… he had to actively avoid squirming in place just from how uncomfortable he was starting to get from the change in atmosphere. 

All it had taken was one word… and it felt like everything had just turned on its head.

Logan crossed his arms smoothly over his chest, “Given the state of our relationship, it is Logic.. Not Logan.” There wasn’t a single hint of joking or exaggeration in his voice, there was just that air of polite honesty that somehow managed to rub Patton the wrong way. 

“What?” He asked again, his throat choking out the word. This time he was absolutely sure that he was about to cry, was this.. was this Logan ending their friendship? Was he really that tired of them and their jokes? Did he… 

Did he hate them? 

“What are you talking about?!” This time it was Roman who spoke up, the creative side had been lounging on the couch for a majority of the time. Only now rising once it was apparent how upset Patton was getting with Logan’s selective words, and to top it off… he was getting rather upset himself at it. Did this name change just go to Patton, or was it all of them combined? “Listen,” Roman tried to say patiently. “If you’re upset and angry about your schedule not being followed this is not the way to act about it, tell us and we’ll work something out. Don’t just pull this shit and expect us to not know what to do with it!”

Roman’s breath came out in hot angry puffs, he honestly hadn’t expected himself to get so worked up over this.

Logan’s eyes shifted over to him, clearly waiting a moment to see if Roman was done talking. “Creativity.” Roman’s lungs seized, and his breathing stopped right then and there with that one little word. Logan was… Logan was serious. “I am not angry.” He said patiently. “I understand that sometimes things come up that can get in the way of a preplanned schedule. It is okay, and I understand that nothing could be done that specific day.” Logan linked his fingers together. “However, I am merely stating that I wish to not be referred to so casually.” 

Their mouths gaped openly, a mixture of concern, fear, and puzzlement written over each of their faces. For a moment Roman had no idea what to say, after everything involving Patton and Janus this just felt like one more thing that he didn’t understand. He was fairly certain that none of them understood this though, judging by the looks on each of their faces. None of them knew why Logan was choosing to pursue this, and honestly… he was kind of scared to know exactly why. 

Because that meant in some kind of way… they had all fucked up. 

Roman hated himself for the words that came out of him next, “Are we not close? I thought that knowing your name, and using it meant that.. that you trusted us with it.”  

For a split second, Logan looked up to the ceiling and Roman fought the urge to bristle indignantly at the implications. The hurt in his heart steadily being replaced by a new feeling that he couldn’t yet put his finger on, but once he did…

“No,” Logan merely said, and didn’t elaborate. “I am going to go back to my room should you need to call on me again, I will be drafting up a new schedule that we can all hopefully agree upon, in the meantime... Have a good day.” 

There wasn’t the tiniest hint of resignation or resentment, throughout everything that he’d told them Logan had remained polite to the very end. Even when he ducked out, there weren’t any side eyes, or upset looks from him. Just an air of civil courtesy, that felt so.. so unlike him. Logan got excited about his projects, and he got upset when they didn’t play out to how he wanted them exactly to go. He should have been upset, he should have been spitting barbs and being salty about his failed schedule, he should have reassured Virgil’s anxieties, and he should have…

He should trust them…

Shouldn’t he? 

[lady-ragnvindr]

Here I am at last!!! Okay this is going to be hella strange but listen!

I request a hopefully long scenario os Childe in the office AU where his female s/o comes to see him at work and then takes him to the bathroom to peg the lights out of him. The thing is the strap she bought had a special effect of actually shooting her cum out of it meaning that if she came Childe would be must likely pregnant right? Right. In the end when they're cleaned but the clothes still messy and still in the room he tells her that he's most likely pregnant now. 👀👀👀

KAKSLAJA Hope you do it 😊😘💕

Also picture of reference: https://twitter.com/megumi_gnsn/status/1354898157402918912?s=19

Office Sex

Sub!Childe x Fem!Reader

Warning ⚠️ ⚠️: Public sex, Pegging and male preg implcation

--

Childe sat at his office, fingers typing on the keyboard as more paperwork were submitted. And if it wasn't obvious he was trying to get his work done- courtesy of the few teasing texts you had sent to him on the morning. Sure you love teasing your man, something about making the usual untouchable Tartaglia into a pathetic mess for you and only for you was such a turn on. But the few text messages you had sent to him of the new toy you had bought to use only on him had Tartaglia forget about his dignity and try finish his work as fast as he can before you come in and own him on top of his desk.

While he had busied himself with work- you arrived at the building. The employees knew you, of course they would, being married to a powerful CEO had given you a reputation to live for and damn were you good at being the queen you had always known to be. And of course it gave you a sort of power of Tartaglia, as you walked through the halls of the building- you had your precense known to said man knocking on his door. At the sudden noice, Childe jumped- checking the time- 1 pm...well shit you weren't joking when you said you were arriving soon but no matter it will do. "Come in" His voice quivered and he mentally cringed but soon at seeing you come in and of your beauty he almost dropped himself to his knees right there and then. But he decided to be a good boy and stay put. Walking in- you looked around your surroundings completely ignoring the fidgeting form of your husband and just simply waiting for him to break. And so he did.

"(Y/N) ha w-what *ehm* what a surprise to see you here!" He said- the fake billionaire smile displaying on his pretty face as his voice broke at the expectant eyes of yours who pierced his heart. "Hmm- I wanted to give a you a gift...." walking towards him, you stopped infront of his desk as you saw his lust filled eyes more clearly and the nervous shake of his body under your piercing eyes and with a sickly smirk you said.

"After all- its your birthday"

---

The movement of the shaky stall under Childe's back quivered with every thrust you did inside the gummy walls of your shaky husband. His legs placed around your hips as the grip of your hands on his thighs hardened at the feeling of your toy being clenched over everytime you just so happen to hit his special spot.

The tie of his suit was currently on his mouth muffeling his sweet sounds, his suit opened displaying his perked, bitten nipples and his teary eyes begging you to have mercy on his poor soul. But you were no angel, in fact you were the incarnation of evil if the increase of your pase and the slamming of your hips bruising his backside was of any implication. His cock slapped itself against his tummy whenever one of your strong thrusts pushed him against the stall. He really should give you credit by the stamina you had- if anything you had yourself bruising inside him for minutes that felt more like hours and even though you had pushed him in the males restroom and was able to have him bend over infront of the mirror and fuck him mindlessly and then moving him inside a stall and just have him and you in different positions- you still had the energy to do so much more and Childe knew.

Now what he didn't know was that the toy you had inside him was a ejaculated one- and the special kind too. It was able to transfer your cum inside him if your were to orgasm and the pure excitement you felt at the idea had you on a goal today as you slammed yourself back inside him- pure on determination to get your sweet husband pregnant.

Childe all but moaned his release was close and the warm of the heat on his pit was growing and with one final thrust- he came. His body shaked and quivered with the aftershocks of his high and as his hazy blue eyes looked up at you he almost sobbed. Smirking, your eyes under the light of the restroom glowed more then intended and when he felt your toy still inside him but slamming yourself against his prostate he didn't expect wetness to cover his wall. Biting your lip- you came, and at the low moan and cross-eyed of your love, you knew that the toy had done its job.

His thighs quivered as he looked at you in shock but didn't had the energy to say anything for his body was in euphoria- the feeling of your cum pressing onto his walls still lingered. Finally pulling out, you watched as his clenching hole tried preventing your cum to fall and on seeing that you just picked his pants from his ankles and shoved them up on his waist. Childe whined, his mind to slow to comprehend what you had done until he felt the warmth of his pants covering his shaky legs and the wetness from both his behind and front wetting the pants.

While he relaxed, you had him all suit up and ready to go. Checking one last time on his look- you nodded to yourself in pride and cleaned yourself up. Finally opening the stall, you grabbed his waist and prevented his weak body to slam on the floor. Holding him by the hip you moved him to the door and so you walked the two of you to his office- quietly ignoring the weird looks from passing people.

Going inside his office, you slumped his body on his chair and lightly moved his hair away from his sweaty forehead. As you did that, he looked at you a boyish smile glowing on him as he admired you. "I think y-you got me p-pregnant hehe" he said, amusement laced in his voice.

"I-I feel f-fullllll!!"

You smirked, "That was the plan after all babe."

[infernalrevenge]

Extra Ordinary

Fandom: Choices - Foreign Affairs

Pairing: F!Blaine Hayes x M!MC (Magnus Quezon)

Rating: G

Summary: Blaine and Magnus sneak off to a traveling fair.

Notes: Inspired by a message from @i-cant-think-of-a-name-15 wherein he told me I could write about "a purple panda visiting Vancross" and he'd still read about it, so I was minorly inspired. This is much longer than what I've written and posted here so far, so fair warning on that.

----------

"A fair?"

Magnus raised an eyebrow at Dionne, who clutched her phone as she showed him her text messages from Blaine.

"Yeah, she said she got tickets the other day, arranged for you two to go, and everything! It's only in town for a week, and tonight's the last night before they pack everything up the next day."

Before he could even object -- the thought of everyone still breathing down his neck about the scandal and cleaning up his image still weighing heavily on his mind -- she interrupted, "You don't have any classes tomorrow, you’re free, and you need the break! Plus it'll be so romantic, just you and Blaine--"

"And our bodyguards."

"--Having the time of your lives at a fair! Come on, it'll be fun, Magnus! Like you're gonna say no to her."

Okay, she's got him there.

It only took a little bit of pleading to get Tatum to agree to his antics this time, rolling his eyes as if he was used to it at that point. Nevertheless, he escorted the First Son to the pier where the fair grounds were, dressed as casually and inconspicuously as possible.

Magnus adjusted his sunglasses and beanie, glancing behind him to see if his bodyguard was right behind, only to find him gone. He did say he was just going to keep a "respectable distance", but it didn't make him any less nervous being out and about like this. It wasn't that he didn't trust his date to show up, it was that he was worried that she would and so would the paparazzi. They haven't exactly relented on their quest to squeeze out every juicy detail of his story.

He tried to scan the crowd for any sign of Blaine, only to be suddenly grabbed by the arm. He stumbled back in surprise, accidentally bumping into a mother with her kids. "Sorry sorry, I'm so sorry miss!" he quickly apologized, but the lady left in a huff, and he found himself face to face with none other than the mastermind of this operation.

"Geez, I forgot how you scared so easily. Sorry about that," Blaine remarked, clearly amused. Magnus could only roll his eyes, but was nonetheless relieved to find her -- or rather, have her find him.

He had to admire her insistence on the whole plan, and the fact that she had a plan in the first place. Of course, they couldn't get away from their bodyguards and had to effectively hide any prominent features of theirs to avoid being recognized, but hey, he would take any excuse to be with her.

"We've got a lot of ground to cover if we wanna make the most of this place," Blaine said. They made their way inside hand in hand.

"I'm starting to feel bad, leaving you with all the work of planning out covert dates. I should return the favor some time," Magnus said with a small laugh, taking in the sights and smells around him. The sun was beating down on every head present, hung up on a bright blue sky. It was quite crowded, which was a security concern, but it also meant it would be harder for untrained eyes to spot them in the sea of faces. Still, it had him a bit on edge.

"Looking forward to whatever you've got cooking up there, Rutherland. I'm sure you can think of something." Blaine looked up at the rides, the screams of its passengers intriguing her to give the experience a shot. It would also help to distract Magnus, as she noticed he was rather tense. "Where do you wanna go first?"

Magnus wasn't always the type to try to impress a date, but he might have been pushing it a little when he suggested an octopus ride. "I've never ridden one before. My mom always said they would break and the cart I'd be in would fly off."

It felt that way as soon as the ride started too. Magnus held onto the safety bar in front of them for dear life, his insides doing massive flips with every rotation. It was very thrilling, but it was also a strangely ticklish sensation that had him laughing and screaming the whole time. Blaine was having the time of her life, on the other hand, raising both arms in the air at multiple points as she whooped and jokingly yelled for it to go faster. Their excited screams blended in with the cacophony of the other riders, and somehow, that made the First Son feel the most normal he had since the day started.

If you were to ask him, Magnus would deny how his hands were shaking as they got off the ride, remnants of that thrill and momentary terror still running through his body. But it helped to have Blaine take both his hands and encouraged him to breathe deeply instead of the usual teasing he expected from her.

"Do you go on octopus rides often?" he asked, sucking in another breath before exhaling slowly.

"I'm actually more of a lazy river kind o' girl, but I love the adrenaline rush anyway," she casually replied, trying her best to ground him and calm his racing heart and stomach.

The two of them decided to eat some snacks as a substitute for lunch, settling for corn dogs, cotton candy, and watermelon slices. Along the way, Magnus spotted a giant panda stuffed toy in one of the game booths, its usual black patches replaced with a bright purple. Blaine followed his distracted gaze and giggled, trying to get his attention. “See something you like?”

The Rutherlandian chuckled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I, uh... it’s a giant panda, kinda hard to miss.” He was trying his best not to seem too obvious about his curiosity and desire to have it. However, after passing by the same booth a few more times as they explored the grounds, with his attention inevitably drifting to the toy, Blaine took him there herself to see if she can win it for him.

“You don’t have to--”

“Just let me do this for you. Besides, not like you can keep your eyes off of it.”

A laugh escaped him, “Are you telling me you’re jealous of a stuffed toy panda now?”

“I’m literally gonna win it for you, Rutherland, I am the farthest from being jealous. I promise by the end of the night, you'll be one panda richer.”

Basketball was the name of the game -- all she had to do was sink three shots in a row through the hoop across. Simple enough, if only she weren’t so far away from behind the starting line. Every time she threw the ball and watched it soar through the air, it was always just a few feet shy of the goal. By the time Blaine was on her sixth total attempt, she was just slamming the cash on the counter in frustration to pay for more chances, which the manager gladly accepted each time.

Magnus tried to get her to stop, insisting that it was fine and she didn’t need to waste so much money on a game “that was clearly rigged anyway.”

“Hey, I promised I’d get you that, and goddammit you are gonna get it!” she stubbornly replied, setting down another two dollars. This time though, she took a pause to rest and re-think her strategy.

Blaine furrowed her eyebrows, her focus alternating between the ball and the hoop, until an idea struck her. A wide mischievous smirk appeared on her face as she pinned the ball under her arm and climbed onto the counter, much to everyone's surprise.

"Hey, you're not allowed up there, miss!" the man behind the stand yelled, holding a hand up. The Ardonian was undeterred.

"Why? I'm still behind the line," she pointed out.

"You could fall and get hurt, you have to--" Magnus started, but Blaine was already focused on her goal, ball in hand as she lifted it up.

The height certainly gave her an advantage, taking one successful shot after another, despite the manager's and Magnus' protests. Her date still hung back right behind her, arms slightly raised to ready himself just in case. If she was so insistent on doing things her way, hopefully it wouldn't end in a hospital visit. She would hear an occasional "be careful!" between shots, but when she finally got the last one she needed, she practically threw caution to the wind after the ball.

“Victory is mine, asshole!” she yelled in triumph, throwing her arms up in the air in celebration.

She didn't anticipate how the momentum would throw her off balance though, misstepping behind her. She yelped and tried to move forward, but it was too late. One second she was falling back toward the ground, then the next... she was in Magnus' arms.

She looked up at him and laughed, "Good catch. You work out?" she commented with a wink, letting him help her stand back up.

"Let's just say you can always trust me to catch you," he replied with a hint of a flirtatious tone, before nudging her with his elbow. "But never do that again," he warned, though he was clearly just worried about her.

The Ardonian flipped her hair over her shoulder, turning her attention to the manager. "One panda, my good sir!"

He begrudgingly handed over the stuffed toy to Blaine, who then proceeded to proudly present it to Magnus. He had to wrap both arms around its fluffy torso just to be able to hold onto it securely.

"Consider this my apology for worrying you," she joked, patting the toy's fluffy arm.

"This feels a bit cliche, doesn't it?" he said, his voice partially muffled by the huge obstruction between them.

"What do you mean? It's a role reversal. It's the guy usually winning prizes for the girl, right?"

"I just mean the situation in general. Do you always win giant pandas for your dates?"

"Only for you, babe. Though I'll happily take it back if you don't want it."

At that, Magnus turned and kept it away from Blaine when she tried to reach for it. "No, you already gave it to me, so keepsies." He stuck his tongue out at her, looking more childish than ever, which earned him a boop on the nose.

"One more ride for the road?"

It was already sunset by the time they got on the ferris wheel. The sky was a gradient of pink, orange, and yellow as the sun started to set, slowly sinking in the horizon where the sky met the sea. It took some convincing for the ride manager to allow the stuffed toy on board, as long as they didn't drop it -- like Magnus was ever going to let that happen.

The newly christened Taro (as Magnus insisted on calling the panda) sat on his side, with Blaine snuggled on the other, her head settled on his shoulder. The ride moved slowly as other passengers boarded, and they were getting close to the top, just enough to enjoy the view.

"I know the rooftops at Vancross had great views of sunsets, but nothing beats being this close to it, huh?" Blaine said, her fingers idly playing with Magnus', intertwining and untwining them.

"Being in great company helps me appreciate it more too," Magnus replied, before turning to the stuffed toy next to him, sitting at eye level given its size. "Isn't that right, Taro?"

"Sorry, am I ruining your moment here?" she joked, gently nudging at his arm. Magnus simply smiled and wrapped an around her shoulders, pulling her even closer to his side.

"But seriously though, today was really fun. I'm glad you convinced Dionne to convince me to come out here. At this point, it's hard to say no to even just seeing you."

"Even if it means infuriating your bodyguard?"

Magnus rolled his eyes, looking off as the sky started to darken. "He wasn't infuriated, I'd say irritated at best, but he gets it. He's always been supportive of my 'be a normal person' agenda."

"Did I help deliver?"

"Oh definitely. You sure know how to make a guy feel normal, in a good way."

Blaine glanced up at him, "What does being normal mean to you?"

The young man blinked, not expecting such an introspective question. The lights on the ferris wheel started to turn on, giving him a view of Blaine under their soft glow. He almost lost himself in the sight and backtracked on the question.

He gave himself a moment to think, choosing his words carefully, "Just... being able to live my life away from scrutinizing eyes, I guess. I don't want the public to see me as someone or something that I'm not just because some tabloid article told them this or that."

She nodded in understanding, pulling his arm closer. "Definitely. It's like the general population seems to forget we're people too. We have our own lives and identities, and it's not something that can be toyed with."

"I wish I didn't have to act a certain way, I don't want them to change me. I wish... things were different." A bout of silence passed between them, the ride moving at its leisurely pace to give its passengers time to appreciate it.

"But if they were, then I never would've met you, so it's not all bad. You're... one of the best things that's ever happened to me, you know?" Magnus looked at Blaine, a small yet genuine smile on his face. The girl looked up at him almost with a flicker of doubt at first, but looking deeper into his eyes, she knew he was telling the truth.

And she wasn't sure how to handle that.

She could feel her stomach doing flips, a thrill running through her -- except it wasn't like she was on a fair ride. This was somehow more intense, yet she felt grounded with him by her side. She couldn't help the smile that bloomed, her cheeks darkening slightly as she took in his words.

"You're too good, Magnus. I hope the world never changes you."

The way she said his name sounded almost adoring, like she was in awe of what a genuine soul he was despite everything that's happened to him. She knew what it was like, having been expected to keep up appearances her whole life, but somehow this boy right next to her never seemed to lose touch of himself along the way. He knew what he had to do, but he also knew who he was at the end of the day.

Just hearing her say it like that was enough to melt Magnus' insides with a loving warmth. A smile spread across his face, leaning forward to press a soft kiss on her lips. He was just so relieved that he never had to pretend around Blaine, never had to prove anything to her. It was more than enough just having her there by his side, and even though he was looking forward to the day he can finally be out with her in public with pride, moments like these made their secret trips still worth going through.

.

.

.

(Due to Taro's size, it couldn’t quite fit in Magnus' bed as intended, so it instead resided on the couch in the suite. It didn't mean he didn't take any chances to nap on it though.

Dionne has sent many pictures to Blaine of the young man's face buried into its fluffy stomach, curled up on the small space as he rested peacefully, and Blaine has had to stifle many squeals of delight at the adorable sight.)

[meltingheartsandcores]

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 (Here)

...I’m starting to think I should put this on ao3 or something. 

Third installment of wwx raised by his parents but breaks into Cloud recess. I need a shorter name for this.

So, re:wwx’s Horsetail Whisk, it’s name is 雪焰, which is also CSSR’s courtesy name. However I don’t know chinese at all, so if the name itself is clunky or wrong, please tell me and I’ll do my best to fix it.

Now this is shorter than the last one, sorry, but, it’s just how it flowed. I hope you enjoy it anyways!

Copying rules was the most boring punishment Wei Wuxian has ever sat through. It’s probably the most boring punishment in the history of ever. Seriously, was the goal to bore him to death? 

Although, if that was the goal, Lan Qiren shouldn’t have sent his nephew to supervise. It’s an objective fact that Lan Wangji is attractive. He’s beautiful. Carved from Jade is the common remark. Wei Wuxian starts doodling aimlessly while he stares at Lan Wangji. 

“You should be writing.” Lan Wangji states without looking up from his reading. 

“But Er-gege, you’re so distracting. How can I work when you’re sitting there?” Wei Wuxian whines. 

“Pay attention to your copying.” Lan Wangji states. 

Wei Wuxian pouts, “But it’s boring.” 

“You’ve yet to make it through even one copy. You have three to make.” 

“I know. Doesn’t make it any less boring. What’s your swords name?” 

Lan Wangji is silent for a moment, before stating, “Bichen.” 

“...To avoid wordly matters?” Wei Wuxian asks, and when Lan Wangji nods he smiles, “Cool. Do you have a secondary weapon? When do Sect Cultivators get those? I got mine at nine but-“ 

“Yes.” Lan Wangji cuts in. 

“What is it? What’s its name?” Wei Wuxian asks eagerly. Lan Wangji eyes the paper and brush that Wei Wuxian had started ignoring. Wei Wuxian looks down and pouts, “If you tell me I won’t ask anymore questions, and I’ll start copying again.” 

Lan Wangji stares at Wei Wuxian for a moment before stating, “Guqin. Wangji.” 

Wei Wuxian blinks, ’Did he… name his Guqin after himself?’ He was tempted to ask, but he had promised not to ask anymore questions… so. Wei Wuxian pinks his brush back up and starts copying again, remaining silent for a while to figure out how to best say what he wanted to say without asking a single question. When he’s more or less figured it out, he smiles and opens his mouth, “Wangji’s a nice name. At least you named your Guqin after yourself.” No denial, so it was most likely true. Or Lan Wangji was done with him. “When my Grandmaster gave me a horsetail whisk, the only person I had seen use one was my mother, so, naturally at nine years old, I named it A-Niang.” Aha! Lan Wangji was not done with him. He was looking very unimpressed with Wei Wuxian, and it can’t be about the copying because he’s still doing it! “My dad thought it was hilarious and was very on board with me actually naming it Mama. But then the question came up of what would I call my mom. So then my Grandmaster suggested I call it Xueyan, my mom’s courtesy name no one used anymore.” Wei Wuxian smiles and shrugs, “At nine I still called it A-Niang sometimes. At fifteen I… actually still do. Sometimes. It’s a hard habit to break. Although I’m actually very surprised they didn’t let me call it A-Niang. They let me call my sword Suibian.” 

“Your sword should have a proper name.” Lan Wangji scolds. 

“Suibian is it’s proper name. It’s inscribed and everything. I think they only stopped me from calling it A-Niang because at nine I liked to talk to my sword and would do the same with Xueyan, which meant it got very confusing as to when I would be talking to my Mom or my Horsetail Whisk. It was obvious to me, still is, not so to everyone else apparently. I really only understood why it was a problem for everyone else when my Jiujiu threatened to call his Horsetail Whisk A-Ying and showed just how irritating it can be when you don’t know if someone is talking to you or their weapon.” Wei Wuxian snorts, thinking of Xingchen, “Jokes on him, he did it for a day til I understood and changed Xueyan’s name, but his Horsetail Whisk had grown very attached to the name so it refused to be called anything else. So now his whisk has the inscription of A-Ying as it’s name.” Xingchen didn’t use the right character for Wei Wuxian’s name, but still. He was walking around with a horsetail whisk named after his favourite Wai Sheng (-“You’re my only Wai Sheng.” “Which makes me the favourite! Unlike you who is one of many Jiujiu’s!”) 

Lan Wangji shakes his head, clearly disappointed in the chaos that was Wei Wuxian’s family. “Lan Wangji! Ji-gege! You’re disappointed, right?” Wei Wuxian asks, earning himself a glare from Lan Wangji. Wei Wuxian opens his mouth to explain, to express his happiness at being able to read Lan Wangji at least a little, and hopefully correctly, but it snaps shut of it’s own accord, and Wei Wuxian couldn’t get it to open again.

’Another silencing spell?! So mean!’ Wei Wuxian whines but turns his attention back to his copying. Maybe Lan Wangji will release it if Wei Wuxian behaves? 

Lan Wangji doesn’t release the silencing spell until Wei Wuxian is done copying for the day and they leave the library. Free, Wei Wuxian wanders around, walking any which way with Lan Wangji trailing after him. Supervising. 

“Jiang Cheng!” Wei Wuxian calls, not loud enough to be considered shouting, and rushes over to the other boy, but not fast enough to be considered running.  

“First day of punishment over already?” Jiang Cheng asks, crossing his arms. 

Mmhmm. I was thinking of fish.” 

“Hunting animals is forbidden within Cloud Recess.” Wangji states. 

“Then I’ll find a river outside of Cloud Recess to fish in. Maybe I’ll invite Nie-Xiong.”

“You won’t be able to for a while. Last I heard he was whining because his assistant has to return to Qinghe.” Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes.

“Meng-Xiong?” Wei Wuxian didn’t try to stop himself from yelling, or from running away. Lan Wangji doesn’t follow him. 

It doesn’t take long for Wei Wuxian to find Nie Huaisang and Meng Yao. True to Jiang Cheng’s words, Nie Huaisang was not acting happy about Meng Yao’s depature, if Meng Yao’s face was anything to go by. Wei Wuxian rushes forward and hangs off of Huaisang’s back. 

“You’re leaving?” Wei Wuxian asks, half draped on Huaisang, who had wrapped an arm around Wei Wuxian’s waist in turn. 

“Nie-Zhongzhu only instructed me to stay for the Ceremony. I must return to Qinghe.” 

Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang whine in sync. “Why?” 

Meng Yao seems politely amused, and Wei Wuxian continues, “I was going to invite you both fishing.” 

“We don’t have the stuff for fishing.” Nie-Xiong states. 

“Animals don’t need tools for fishing, neither do we. Can’t you stay for that Meng-Xiong?” 

Meng Yao shakes his head, “I’ve already stayed longer than I should. I really should get going.” 

“No. You should learn with us too!” 

Meng Yao shakes his head, “I am merely an assistant. Not even a disciple. The lectures would be lost on me.” 

Wei Wuxian and Nie-Xiong whine again, “You’re the only one who’ll actually listen to the lectures.” Wei Wuxian protests. Nie Huaisang waves his fan in agreement. 

“Right. Right. I almost fell asleep in the Ceremony today! We need you.” Huaisang whines. 

“Yeah, and we need someone to cause mischief with. Madame Yu will kill me if I drag Jiang Cheng into it.” Wei Wuxian adds, Huaisang nods rapidly in agreement. 

“Wei-gongzi, I’m not one for mischief.” 

“Liar.” Wei Wuxian could read people well enough to know Meng Yao has a strong mischievous bone in his body. “But that’s why we need you! No one will believe me and Huaisang actually get up to mischief with you around. Besides, you’re smart enough to come up with great plans.” 

“You barely know me, how can you know I’m smart?” 

“Because after your father refused to acknowledge you you went to the Nie clan, which prioritizes skill over bloodlines and has a leader who would gladly give that manwhore the finger.” Huaisang presses his closed fan to his lips, and Meng Yao seems very shocked at his words. It takes Wei Wuxian a moment to realize he just called Jin Guangshan a manwhore outloud. 

Oops? 

“Da ge probably would.” Huaisang says slowly, “But I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone call Jin-Zhongzhu that.” 

“You’ve never met my mom.” Wei Wuxian states dryly, then to Meng Yao, “You can’t just leave. I wanted to get to know you more.” 

“I am doing as Nie-Zhongzhu instructs.” Meng Yao states, unmoved. He’s definitely leaving. 

Wei Wuxian pouts, fine, if that’s what he wants. “Then I guess I’ll have to go with Nie-Xiong after the lectures are over to see you again at, uh, where do you live?” 

“The Unclean Realm.” 

“At the Unclean Realm. The Unclean Realm?” That didn’t even- oh whatever. “So I’ll visit you in a year Meng-Xiong.” 

Meng Yao sighs, but he’s smiling, and it’s not painfully fake so Wei Wuxian counts that as a win, “If that is what you wish, Wei-Xiong.” 

Wei Wuxian’s smile grows and he launches himself from Huaisang to engulf Meng Yao in a hug. Meng Yao seems surprised, but Wei Wuxian doesn’t let go until Meng Yao pats him on the back hesitantly and only when he’s sure Meng Yao isn’t going to return the hug. “Safe travels. Write. And I’ll save you from Huaisang.” 

“Save him from-“ Huaisang yelps when Wei Wuxian picks him up and takes him away from Meng Yao so the man could leave in peace. “No! Let me go! I need to stay with A-Yao!!!” Huaisang whines.

[pizzablondie]

Invasion of Privacy

Ok so this is something that is absolutely driving me mad. Due to saving up for my first house (which I will hopefully be moving in to sometime this year if everything goes to plan) I have been living with my parents.

Now I know that I have been very fortunate as it has allowed me to save up faster as they only wanted a little bit of rent (which I am very grateful for do not get me wrong) I am struggling with the privacy element. They seem to have no regard or respect for personal space. I have actually discussed some of my irritations with my work colleagues/close friends and they thought it wasn't just intrusive but abusive.

I basically live in my bedroom at the moment, its where I sleep obviously but it is also where my PC is (from which I occasionally work from home), Where I occasionally eat and my television and my games consoles are. Now picture this, I go to work and I am gone roughly 8 and a half hours. Now in that time my mum has wandered in to my room, rearranged all my possessions, read my mail and gone through my private belongings. On one of these occasions she actually came in to my room, went to the left hand side of my bed near the window (which she had no reason to) take out a clear takeaway Tupperware box and put all my hidden sex toys inside. When I asked her about this she said "Well they shouldn't be out on display and they are all together now in that box" despite the fact she has no reason to come in to my bedroom and they are out of sight as they are down the side of my bed, so unless you actively walked in and awkwardly went around my bed (as my room is quite cramped) you wouldn't see them at all (Especially as I did tuck them under my bed slightly anyways so it wasn't obvious). I was literally lost for words when I saw what she had done, not to mention the fact she didn't seem to think there was anything weird about a mother gathering her daughters intimate sexual possessions and organising them in a takeaway box so they look 'tidy'.

I hate the fact that nothing in the one place that I call my own can be private or left untouched. I am 25 years old, I find this behaviour incredibly frustrating and no matter how many times I have tried to tell her to stop coming in to my private space and rummaging/moving my things (to which she usually sulks pulls the "Sorry I'm such a shit mum" routine, stays out for one or two days then continues her normal behaviour) I don't know what to do. Whenever I get a prescription she noseys at it then gives me a ten minute lecture on how I should take it (despite I have been taking my medication for over 10 years now, so I'm pretty sure I know how it works). When I was a child they would read my diary and then make jokes about the things I wrote (I am an introvert and didn't have many friends to talk to growing up so my diary was like my safe place to vent my thoughts, idea's and problems, I can't be the only one thinking this was cruel to expose me like that?). Whenever I try to bring it up I get mocked for being 'oversensitive' or to 'get over it'. I just don't know what to do, I guess the only thing is to just put up and shutup until I get the keys to my house.

Part of me believes it is a controlling issue on their behalf. When I put in an offer for my first house, I told my mum that I didn't want her to buy me anything for it as I want to build it up myself and I also have very specific taste in décor (her taste is dreadful if I am being honest). Also it is my first ever house, I should be able to have the pleasure of furnishing it and decorating as I please. Despite me making this point to her several times (very, very clearly), she still tries jumping on any opportunity to design what my house will look like. She bombards me with links to lamps and furniture she has found (which 9/10 is dreadful and nothing like the themes I have repeatedly said I am planning), my dad has even tried telling her to back off but she yet again does the whole sulking routine. Its so frustrating she just will not listen no matter how I try and tackle the problem. I'm sorry to vent so much but this is the only place I can that I know she won't find. Anybody have any advice or tips? I just want to be able to get through to her and make her listen without being guilt tripped or completely ignored, that shouldn't be so hard should it?

[cosmosrival]

there it is! kama interlude analysis by a kama fan!

WELL. LIKE IT SAYS IN THE TITLE: this is just my own thoughts!! youre free to think whatever u want !! i am just putting my own knowledge into words because i genuinely love kama, and i would like for kama’s depth to be understood by the NA fandom a little more!! i try to stay as close as possible to their character in everything i do because i believe that the more in character they are, the funnier/more interesting content ppl will produce. 

and hopefully i understood them well ???!!!! HOPEFULLY ?!

i will be screenshotting the translated reddit post under this read more and stop whenever something i find interesting to develop pops up ! or else it’ll get way too long lol if you wanna read the interlude for yourself heres the link!

with that said, let’s go!!

kama’s interlude begins with guda passing the hell out because of exhaustion and then waking up in a dream sequence where kama treats them to some relaxing adventures, stuff to take their mind off heavy things!! first dream sequence is kama roleplaying a highschool setting where they’re dating.

i like this because they openly admit that its an illusion, breaking the immersion but as long as youre okay with roleplaying, they’ll continue it LOL  at some point, caesar mentions the student council president and arjuna appears behind him 

since this is an illusion that kama made, i’ve been wondering about the fact that the way servants conduct eachother in this interlude is mostly because that’s how kama envisions they would act in a highschool setting, in an amusement park and finally with eachother (mostly for confirmed couples such as siegbryn, consort yu and her hubby etc...). suzuka and sei being gyarus is obvious, but arjuna as the student council president... is so cute???!!! i MEAN IT FITS ?! THATS A GREAT IDEA KAMA!!!! ANYWAY

this is kama’s first monologue and since they’re primarily the god of lust, all of the more vanilla stuff they mentions such as sharing a pair of headphones embarrasses them since its so tame. ITS CUTE !!! kama expects you to be horny in class !! what are you doing thinking about hand holding !!! medusa saves u from that tho with a direct reference to her relationship with kama’s vessel 

this is interesting !! and reassuring !!! i think that kama as a character has a lot of depth and just reducing them to “sakura” would be a waste and this interlude shows how different they are from her. but they’re also similar! sakura went through a lot just like medusa says and kama does have trauma related to shiva. its not the same circumstances but the same kind of suffering which explains the nuance here. and what i like about chaldea is that there’s been multiple instances where its been proven that servants can grow thanks to their relationships with guda (most common example: leveling up your bonds) BUT ALSO, saint graph evolution (alts). and as a kama fan i’d like to see them happy someday and this interlude as a whole is proof of their healing/coping because of the time they spent in chaldea and how they interact with others. more on that later ! here, they don’t recognize medusa which is normal since they’re not sakura (someone else entierly), but...

they care about her ! because of sakura’s influence being a part of the servant called Kama(assassin). the difference here is important !! but i’ll come back on this in a bit. quick mention to the greek cupid <3 kamadusa nation we were fed (i clap by myself because im the only one who has 57575757557 kama rarepairs-----)

kama is a delinquent whos horny in class but still takes a few notes, enough to do well on their tests! and thats tea<3 smart horny lazyass !! theyre a gift

SO ARJUNA WAS OUT FOR BLOOD ????? ANYWAY, this is right after the actual fight against weirdo terrorists, and im happy to know that kama DOES enjoy a good fight (as proven in their voicelines as well) but theyre not a farming unit because it’d be too much work (single target NP..)...!!!!!!! lavish god of love.... 

FINALLYYYYYYYYYYY THE REAL DEAL !!!!!!!!!!!! “it feels wonderful to be your girlfriend” christ, kamadeva was so used to being a husband and a good lover, it reflected in their servant version.... but ree what do u mean by servant version???

I MEAN THE OBVIOUS !! kama explains it very well in the screenie just above ! 

“You know very well how servants work.”

KAMA ASSASSIN (the servant in your chaldea) is neither KAMADEVA or SAKURA MATOU or MARA. they’re a MIX OF PARTS OF THE THREE. creating an entierly new person(in this case, servant) !!!! it might sound like i’m repeating myself, but this is important!!!!!!!!! i will say this multiple times so people remember it !!! and if u already had this figured out: GOOD JOB I LOVE U !!!

Kamadeva (the god) has many stories, ones where he was born from concepts (dharma and shraddha), one where his parents are brahma and sarasvati, one where his parents are vishnu and lakshmi, stories about his reincarnation after his death where his parents are krishna and rukmini, his love with Rati and so on. We all know Sakura’s backstory since this is nasuverse. And Mara is a demon, an entity that tried to corrupt Buddha and prevent him from reaching enlightenment/stray from the path. Kama assassin has parts from all of these entities which explains why they have a vague longing for Rati, why they have a soft spot for Medusa and why they have an affinity with Kiara(and also like talking about corrupting u !). 

they then mention how a japanese highschool setting is fun and all i have to say is: i’m gonna make an indo fam delinquent vs student council au out of this one folks !!!!!!!! i gotta !!! 

OK next

TIME FOR THE SECOND DREAM SEQUENCE WHICH I WAS VERY VERY VERRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYY AFRAID OF BEFORE THE TRANSLATION CAME OUT.

THE PART WHERE KAMA ACTS LIKE YOUR CHILD.

well with their stage 1 it was expected but without the translation i have to say that i was scared shitless! because people hate thinking! and even if kama clearly tells you that it’s a charade, u know a JOKE. A DREAM SEQUENCE. DONT BE A CREEP. KAMA INTENDED FOR IT TO BE WHOLESOME. i know some ppl wont use their brains. but u know its fgo and degenerates are everywhere. 

anyways. family bonding time ensues until another monologue appears!!

exactly like before, kama mentions myths that belonged to kamadeva. Meaning that the Kama in our chaldea isn’t the Kamadeva we know and is not Pradyumna either but the fact that the writers chose to have kama acknowledge it is very reassuring !!! Because it means that they’ve chosen to make it a part of their (complicated) history. Kama says that Pradyumna is the myth about themself they know the least, once again proving us that the Kama in our Chaldea (Assassin) is a different entity and that they were summoned to the throne upon their death, the moment they were burned by Shiva’s flames and became Ananga, in any case they’re still familiar with all of their own myths. it allows us to keep heroic spirits separate from their original myths. Obviously! And in the case of pseudo-servants, it allows us to keep them separate from their vessels. Cuz this is a fanservice japanese game. Andddd the fandom likes forgetting this fact quite a lot i’ve noticed. As a person who loves thinking about tons and tons of headcanons for fun, this allows us a lot of space ! Because this is fate/grand order at its base. Nasuverse. 

I’m glad that the interlude explains it so clearly, it’s very good !! Because the majority of myths from every culture are confusing, family trees are confusing, names are confusing, powers and attributes are confusing... its a mess !!!! the fgo characters we know are just cut from their own respective timelines/historial figures so the writers can organize themselves more easily. Like cutting halves from a big cake. Kama (Assassin) is the Kama that died from Shiva’s flames and became the universe ONLY. In Nasuverse, Arthur Pendragon is a woman. Anastasia Romanov NEVER had a demon familiar named Viy in real life despite the creature being part of russian folklore. u know ! im russian i can testify dude !! 

hopefully everyone got this bc i wont be explaining this any further dude, its exhausting !!!!!! bangs my hands on the table !!!!! 

ANYWAYS kama mentions “eternal pain that turns [them] into ash” being their key element. Their trauma is at the center of their heroic spirit self, what they are as a servant. This suffering is tied to everything they do, why they’re so lazy, why they’re so lax, why they’re so detached from their job.  But they’re not detached from their role. And “job” and “role” have different connotations here. They refuse to work as a cupid because of obvious reasons. BUT. They’re not detached from their role as the God of Love, as the God of Passion. The embodiment of those feelings. This whole interlude is proof ! They’re giving u free therapy because they Love you. Passion. They feel your love. Passion. They acknowledge how much fun you’re having. How passionate you are about certain things. They might seem extremely detached and hateful, but they aren’t. They’re one of the most empathetic servants there is. And their ability to love everything, even the things they hate is what makes them so miserable. Because it’s a part of them. Because the concept of Kama in hinduism is linked to them. Be it lust or simply the passion born from anything you do where you’re enjoying yourself. (quote:  “ the term also refers to any sensory enjoyment, emotional attraction and aesthetic pleasure such as from arts, dance, music, painting, sculpture and nature “. R. Prasad (2008), History of Science, Philosophy and Culture in Indian Civilization )

... I’d like to say that this contrast with Mara is interesting. And that i’m glad the writers chose to add in Mara to the kama assassin Beast mix. 

Because the anger Mara feels can become a drivepoint for Kama. I’ve always believed that anger and sadness are two sides of the same coin, it’d explain how layered Kama is and how valid their emotions are. Constantly torn between love and hate. An eternal grudge (i don’t deserve to be hurt like this) and an eternal misery(maybe i do deserve to be hurt like this). 

i wish they were my roommate <3 oh fuck ree got emotional wait where were we.

OH YEAH

i think kama saying that they dislike being involved with other indian servants because theyre linked to shiva is a feeble attempt at trying to keep up a strong front because they still love them in the end. cuz that’s how kama is ! after a while they’ll get bored of bullying ganesha and ashwatthama. they’ll get interested in rama because their respective mythos are linked even if their servant selves have no connection. hell, at the end of the interlude they talk about parvati and how they themself changed and realized things. BUT OH WELL, THATS STUFF FOR ANOTHER POST HEHE thats just ree wanting kama to b happy yall move along !!

.....THIS ISNT A COLLEGE STUDENTS ROLEPLAY BUT ITS A CUTE JAPANESE COMPANY BOSS/UNDERLING SETTING AND ITS CUTE SO I THINK KAMA WEARING A PENCIL SKIRT AND POURING U ALCOHOL IS CUTE. CUTE.

further proof of kama’s overflowing affection and what i detailed above!! hopefully u all knew this one simply from reading this interlude/their profile page and dont need me to write it down for u. HOPEFULLY !!!!!

(I START BEATBOXING VERY RAPIDLY AND RUNNING TOWARDS YOU) KAMA IS A SADIST AT THEIR CORE AND I WILL NEVER STOP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they’re easy to fluster because theyre not used to being so vanilla, but whats underneath is how they truly are !! a beast turned servant, the sweetest sadist !! theyre very mature and this interlude is so well written (wipes my teears

this is directly linked to what i explained above, by burning you away, you’ll melt into nothingness just like they did. When they were the universe, they felt both everything and nothing. 

But was it really relief ... ?

... IT WASNT.

AND PARVATI SAVES THE DAY !!!!!!! phew!! thank u paru, it’d still like to be able to touch kama’s huge titties and i cant do that if i turn into ashes (falls down the stairs

ok she summoned lovey dovey canon couples to annoy kama since they’re exhausted of seein them!!

...............(I TAKE OUT A KNIFE) TAKE THAT BACK. DONT TALK TO THEM LIKE THAT. TAKE THAT BACK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

ohhhhhh im obsessed i love when theyre angry<3 i love when theyre fighty <3 i think they should beat the living shit out of a boxing bag DAILY to let out some of this steam. they’d be a monster on the ring... aaa kama in training boot y shorts aa a .. .uughg hg ouu... (you all shove me into a locker)

ok this is interesting !! i think that the interlude showing us that parvati feels a semblance of guilt is character dev. proof for what i mentioned before!! in ookuu parvati felt quite ..unsympathetic to me, even if kama is a beast who wants to annihilate humanity, when u think about it, at their core their grudge is because of her and shiva’s betrayal. and here, she properly apologizes for making kama so upset. this is heartwarming to me since i dislike thinking that members of the indo fam hate eachother :( same goes for arjuna and karna, at some point i’d like for them to act like bros normally and finally be comfy. but anyways !!

u wake up from the dreams and da vinci, mashu and paru are here to tell u whats going on. But its fine bc u remember everything and u have to go thank someone for helping u out!!!

CUTE !!!!!!! THEY CARE ABOUT U !!!!!! but whether it be because of their role or because theres a deeper meaning is entierly up to your own interpretation because...

of what they say here. 

and here !! 

ohhhhhhhhh this is so important !!!!!!

this is actual proof of kama’s growth as a servant and how servants evolve in chaldea !! chaldea is not the same as a grail war, its a special, cut-off place and thats what makes it even more relaxing to think about. Everytime u summon a servant in ur chaldea u give them a chance to have fun with you, to have fun with other servants, to make amends, to start from scratch, to discover things they would’ve never known in their time (movies, video games, tons of different foods etc...), u give them a chance to relax. to grow !! this is the headcanon that im most attached to and im glad to see it be confirmed in the interlude of a character i love tbqh i had to stop and talk about that.

everyone say thank u kama !! can we roleplay a college roommate coffee shop slowburn au next time <3 

ANYWAYS if you’ve read it this far: thank you !!! im sorry if you expected something very serious, im not that type of person hehe im jus here to have fun and look at things i like, and the interlude itself was quite lighthearted and refreshing. By talking about the myths and all of kamadeva’s stories, the writers basically gave lore nerds a huge thumbs up like... “its ok now !! u can go ape now !! go be insane<3 love u<3″ and all of this kama characterization GENUINELY makes me so happy because i think they really needed that. kama assassin... (i blow a kiss to the sky) is a little mess of a servant... a god, human crumbs and a demon... a total mess... im in love with them...

..............tho now the wait for a summer alt where they interact with the entire indo fam begins (im sitting in a chair unmoving)(i have a gun in case minase begins acting gross

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Our time of relaxing' (Yirina Grigoriev/Helen A. Park) NSFW+18

Summary: After the end of a mission in Algeria, Yirina Grigoriev spent a moment with Park...something that the two didn't do in a long time

To read it on AO3, click here!

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Well, I never thought that in fact, Park was able to pilot a soviet Hind during the mission and I thought at first that she was joking at me when she told me that but it wasn’t a joke at all, it was real, me taking controls of the guns while she was flying this Hind. She was a damn pro in it and when she landed it right at the CIA secret base in the Algerian Desert, it was like my heart was beating for her, not for me.

She was looking so great in that blue flying outfit, hidden by a black hood, some beige straps around her outfit, and her black military boots and once we both landed, she exchanged a glare with mee, something that could have melted my heart, adding to the heat of the desert around us and the clothes I was also wearing. Hopefully, we were directly walking to get to our private quarters, the only thing that the CIA did well with me.

“Still impressed, Yiri?” Park asked me as we entered the room, me first and letting her enter after me.

“Well, yes, I still am,” I replied honestly with a smile on her, the door handle in my hands. “You weren’t joking about your pilot skills,” I added, giving to her that she was right before closing the door behind her.

“As I told you and as you could see, I wasn’t joking,” She affirmed to me clearly, winking at me through her hood as she was putting down her pistol on the only desk of the room and me, walking towards the other side of the room to remove my tactical equipment. “Seems that someone is hot in here,” Park remarked, me knowing that she was talking about me.

“Yeah, I didn’t know that the Algerian Desert was this hot,” I stated, taking off the bulletproof vest from me and its multiples mags before opening widely the jacket I got in me. “That’s the risk but I feel that staying here this long can…” I was going to continue until I turned around to put my eyes on Park, still in her outfit, back turned at me, and arms put on the desk... “Or is it something else?” I chuckled, blushing of red on my face.

“Oh, really, what could it be?” She demanded, her voice muffled by her hood but sounding obvious at me as she was still not looking in my direction.

“Probably someone in this room,” I started, slowly taking off my jacket and putting it aside in a drawer nearby. “Wearing...a blue flying outfit and a black...looking at her desk...as I’m walking to get to her,” I continued, completely describe her perfectly and walking to get behind her.

“Hmm...I wonder who it could be?” She fainted to not know as she turned around at me, just arriving behind her, and even if her lips were behind a hood, the proximity between lips & allowed me to see a smile on them.

“Guess that the answer is just in front of me,” I smiled at her, my hands gently touching around her waist as hers were still holding herself against the desk. “Yeap, it’s you, I’m all sure about it,” I admitted, seeing her blue beautiful eyes, the only part of her face that was visible to me.

“I’m happy to hear that,” She said in a good voice, her hands that got fingerless gloves, moving to get on the top of my shoulders. “Do you want to…”

“It’s been...a long time that we didn’t do it,” I cut her gently, having guessed what she was going to say, “Since we...well, you know, we didn’t do it,” I told her, biting a part of my bottom lip, my eyes still looking hers.

“Yeah, it could be...good and relaxing,” She confirmed to me, giving me a smile on my face before she slowly moves her hands off me to put them around her neck, “I should first get it off,” She was starting to take off her hood before I stop her, having removed only a half of it,

“Wait,” I stopped her, the bottom of her hood posed on her nose, giving me a sight on her jaw and her lips, “Let me kiss you with it first,” I suggested to her and she slowly nodded.

I then leaned forwards, getting my lips on top of hers, starting the kiss, and inside of me, it was as if there was a big volcano erupting, my heart pounding like it did when she landed that Hind. The feeling of her lips on mine was something we missed since we arrived in Africa, not having time for ourselves and been always on a mission didn’t allow that to happen but now, we were willing to do this.

The kiss was slow but very passionated, my hands going up alongside her curves to arrive at her neck, my left thumb touching delicately her scar and it started to slowly caress it during our kiss, my right hand going forwards and getting the part of her head at the back that was still covered by her hood, her hands were instead around my waist, keeping me closer to her.

When I pulled out delicately from her lips, a tear was coming out of her right eye, going down slowly and finishing its course on the black tissue of her hood, a tear that wasn’t meaning that she was sad or bad, just looking good & happy, my fingers staying on her face, feeling her skin around them.

“You’re okay?” I asked her in a low voice.

“Yes, I’m good, always with you,” She replied instantly to me, her hands holding me at my waist and going inside of my shirt, touching my hot skin. “I want it, don’t worry,” She reassured me before I moved my hands to remove her hood off her head.

It was at this moment that I could see her head in its entirely, Park shaking it to make her hair looking less messy than before as I was keeping my eyes on when she was doing it, I was loving her hair, the same style when we first met, I know it and she knows it well.

“Seems better now, isn’t it?” She breathed, bringing me closer with her hands and letting no more space between her & me.

“Yes...I love it,” I affirmed to her in the eyes before my own eyes went on her long scar on the front of her neck, going to each side and finishing at her right side.

“You can kiss it, you know that I like it,” She guessed in my expression that I wanted to kiss her in that spot.

It wasn’t something that she wanted to show to everyone around but when we were alone together or simply in duo in our missions, she was removing the scarf she was always wearing around her neck but to me, she was willingly offering it, even raising her head a bit higher to let me do what I wanted and what she wanted me to do by looking at it on her face.

I took a deep breath before I leaned my lips towards the scar, starting to kiss on its left side, hearing a first little moan coming out between Park’s closed lips when I included my tongue in the kisses, more frequent when I was slipping along her scar. The more I was moving alongside her scar, the more Park was getting pleasure from me, her hands going around my shoulders.

“Yiri...yes...continue…” She spoke up, changing from the moaning, her voice trying to speak without any pleasure but my kisses couldn’t let that happen.

“Yes, I will…” I confirmed to her, taking a breath before kissing her again, going in the other direction as I took for the kisses. “Should we...move it on the bed?” I demanded at her, raising my head as she was going to sit on the desk.

“Of course,” She responded with a smile before she moved by herself to kiss me on the lips, letting her control me & my body.

Her kisses were like mine but there was something else that was making me love it at my highest level, it was like each kiss she was making is recomforting me, giving me a feeling that’s protecting me and our kiss...it was more real than a lot of things that happened to me. She then gestured with her hands below my shirt, causing me to get my white shirt off me, helped by her, and throwing it on the ground before resuming the kiss, leaving me only with a bra covering my breast.

“Here, lay down,” She whispered, making me do some step back with her before my legs touched the bed. She put her right hand above my chest, gesturing to me to lie down on the bed and I complied, observing her body in this blue outfit, “Let’s take it off,” She talked to herself, her hands caressing along her sides.

“Yes, let me see,” I whispered, my hands on the bed and my eyes, hypnotized by Park.

“Always for you, Yirina,” She admitted to me before her left hand moved on the zip of her outfit.

She slowly removed the beige straps around her outfit and then, her hand starts to unzip her outfit, revealing to me the top of her body, a black sexy bra covering her breasts as her outfit at her top was going down her arms until she stopped to unzip her outfit at her crotch level, letting me look at her top and even with that, I was always amazed by seeing her like that, she was perfect.

“You’re perfect,” I complimented her as she was removing the fingerless gloves off her both hands, my own starting to slide down near my crotch. “Park...please…” I muttered, seeing her put her hands on the bed before she crawled on the top of me, stopping herself at my chest level, looking at me.

“I love you, Yirina,” She said to me with a smile, my hands moving to touch her waist before she took them in her own, wrapping our fingers around each other. “I want to give you the pleasure that you want, be yours as you’re mine,” She told me, her eyes looking at her right hand. “Thank you...for it,” She looked back at me.

“It was something I needed to do,” I smiled at her before she leaned against me, her head almost a few centimeters from my lips, her left hand on my cheek. “I need you, Park,” I whispered, breathless, amazed to her beauty,

“And you will don’t worry,” She grinned at me as she moved towards my neck, kissing it as I did a few moments earlier, giving me the same pleasure that I gave her. “I’m ready,” She affirmed as her hands were on top of my breasts.

“Take it off, they’re yours,” I admitted to her and she responded with a smile on her face to me, taking off my bra and exposing my boobs to her.

Her hands were staying delicately on my skin, going down on them as she was still kissing me, starting to my neck until she followed her hands, kissing my shoulders before landing them between my two boobs. She then starts to move her face towards my left boob, passing her hand through her face to remove any hair before she was commencing to kiss my nipple.

The first moaning came out as she was gently nibbling my nipple before sucking it with her mouth, sometimes giving me glares about how I was reacting and my body, my face, they were liking it, she was the best and it was so good that her face could say that she wasn’t going to stop now until I ask her and frankly, it was so lovely that I don’t know if I will ask her that.

“Oh my god, babe…” I moaned, calling her for the first time since we’re together ‘babe’...the first time…” You’re so great,” I added, my right hand on top of my face as she was now concentrating on my other boob, my left hand holding delicately the back of her head, touching her black hair. “Park, yes…” I chuckled, wanting to shout loudly her name but the silence was better as we were still in a CIA base.

“Yiri, do you want me to go down?” She asked me politely, looking at me with a curious face, surely not wanting to force me if I wouldn’t want it.

“Yes, do it, please,” I replied to her, nodding at her and caressing the back of her head. “I want it but...go slowly, okay?” I suggested to her as I didn’t want to be too rough.

“Okay, okay, I will,” She approved my suggestion, feeling her hands going on my pants and its belt. “Let me give you the pleasure you want,” She breathed before she pulled slowly down my pants after unbuckling my belt & removing my shoes, having now only my panties covering my pussy, the only clothes that I was having now on me.

My panties got slowly moved away by her left fingers at its side, revealing my pussy to her as she was getting near it with her face, a smile on it meant for me and I returned it to her. She was having her right hand around my tight as her left one was staying near my pussy. My own one getting on the top of my chest, gently moving them as a form of caressing it passionately.

I could hear take a deep breath before I could feel her lips touching my pussy, me closing my eyes and shutting down my lips to not let any sound for the first seconds after she started, wanting to stay silent but it didn’t very last long, it couldn’t last at all, her kissing along my pussy was giving me so much pleasure and lust inside of me and of course, still feeling this hot with her presence, not the heat from outside and the room.

‘’Mmhm...fuck…” I groaned as it wasn’t her lips anymore, now adding her tongue that was licking me down all along my clit, Park’s eyes looking at me after I spoke. “Yes, baby, it’s perfect,” I told her in a voice that was getting taken over by my emotions.

She was continuing in her moves, keeping a slow pace as I wanted but my pleasure was high, making me move my legs a little and her right hand staying on my left tight, her left hand still feeling it near my crotch before Park looked back at me, a question in her head by looking at her.

“Do you want me to...finger you?” She demanded at me, stopping to lick my clit, my hands still on top of my chest, caressing it.

“Yes, yes, yes…” I replied to her, looking up at the ceiling, moving her left hand away to get her right one near my clit. “Just...one finger, just one,” I proposed to her, wanting to keep it nice & good, not wanting to be rough.

“Don’t worry, I will,” She reassured me as she got next to me at my right, her right hand staying on my pussy, caressing it gently.

She was caressing me before she inserted her ring finger inside my pussy, already making me moan in pleasure of having a finger inside, looking at Park with a smile. Her left fingers were slowly touching my right boob as she was slowly moving her ring finger of me, doing it to please me and for her, she was perfect.

“You’re alright, baby?” She asked me in a passionate voice, surprising me at that and making me grin at her.

“My god...mmhm...yes, I’m alright,” I answered with my voice that was mostly overtaken by her finger inside of me. “Park, I’m...I think I….” I wanted to stay before I stop myself in my words.

“Don’t worry, babe, I’m here,” She reassured me as she leaned against me to kiss me on the lips, trying to make me think of something else as her finger was going a bit faster than before but still at a slow pace.

“Mmhmm…” I moaned loudly during the kiss while we were using our tongues as I reached my orgasm, squirting and when I moaned, Park moved away from me, letting me see my bottom, her finger still inside, and stopped as I just squirted on the bed. “Shit...I...dammit…” I cursed, thinking that I just screwed up the sheets of the bed.

“Hey, don’t panic, we can change them,” Park spoke up, cutting me in my little panic before smiling at me, her left hand caressing my cheeks. “Do you want to go down on me?” She asked and I nodded.

“I want it, Park,” I smiled at her and she returned it, her right hand stroking herself at the top of her chest. “Yes, I want it now,” I added before I sit down on my knees to kiss her again on the lips and letting her going down at the same spot I was, still kissing her.

“Yiri, do it, kiss me, pleasure me,” She demanded, taking on the role I was a few seconds ago, very aroused in her voice.

“I will, you’re my love,” I reassured her, finding myself on top of her in the same position she was.

I then started to reproduce the same moves she did: kissing her first all along her top delicately while my hands were sliding towards her sides gently, pleasuring her by kissing her both nipples and nibbling the two of them, giving her what she wanted and staying kind in my moves as nibbling wasn’t something I was mastering in sex but I was doing it and it was looking like she was loving it, hearing her moan a bit louder than I did.

Then, I slowly start to go down her body, landing kisses on her belly until I arrived at her pussy’s level, her face looking to plead with me to do it already and I grinned at her again before taking a deep breath and once I was good, I commenced to kiss her clit, going slowly and carefully.

“Yes...Yiri...love…” Park moaned, holding the back of my head with her hands, taking a look at her looking up at the ceiling, seemingly taken over by me. “You’re amazing...continue...use your tongue,” She advised me about my moves and since I wanted to give her what she wanted, I complied.

I was licking her now with my tongue all around her pussy, making it all wet before I decided to use it to insert it slightly inside of her clit, taking her by surprise and she was frickin’ loving it on her face, her mouth open to speak up but mostly groaning and wanting me to continue to do what I was doing.

“Yes...use your tongue...finger me…” She demanded, her voice breaking down by the lust and I complied, moving my right hand to insert my ring finger inside of her after getting my tongue out of her pussy. “Fuck...fuck...fuck!” She almost shouted her pleasure loudly, at a point that I thought that the walls around the room weren’t going to be enough to contain her shouting.

Feeling that she was going to cum soon out of pleasure, I moved my body at her right like she did, keeping my right ring finger inside of her and already leaning to kiss her deeply. She was looking overwhelmed by me, her hands going around my naked back, holding me around my waist as my left hand was stroking her cheek during the kiss until I felt her cumming…

“YES!” She said loudly as she squirted out, exactly at the same spot I did wet the sheets after removing my finger off me, her body was looking exhausted, still wrapped in that suit partially but giving me a clear sight of her beauty. “I love you, I love you,” She whispered, looking at me.

“I love you too,” I affirmed to her as I laid down next to her, back against the bed, not removing my eyes from her as we were both looking happy and also exhausted. “I love you, Helen,” I told her.

“Helen? You...it’s the first time you’re calling me by my first name,” She was sounding surprised in her voice by that, and since I think that I wanted to speak at her with her name.

“I always called you by Park but in that situation, when we’re alone, having sex, I want...to call you Helen...that’s your name, the name that I loved,” I explained to her, getting on the left side of my body to get my hands on top of her chest. “I love you, Helen A. Park,” I continued, tears appearing in my eyes

“I love you too, Yirina Grigoriev,” She breathed, getting her hands around my neck and moving to get our foreheads against each other, “Thank you, I love you,” She repeated again, a tear in her eyes, and then, we kissed again in great joy, knowing that now…

We were fully united by our love...our passion...united...

[deanirae]

Can you get it inside your head I’m tired of dancing?  

post 8.07 pre 8.08] crack/angst past turned unrequited deancas, implied deanbenny 2,4k [x]

The sun, also currently known as bitch, has got some serious nerve to sit where it always does, not upside down and nine miles to the left as it frankly should on this memorable fuckhat day. Where is the End of Days when it's really called for? When it should be really nigh?

Dean flips the front mirror panel down not to have to deal with at least that one disappointment. He can still see Cas's half-constipated, half-abandoned and kicked in its fluffy ass puppy face in the mercilessly annoying reflection. The obvious choice would be to not grace it with anything right now, but A – he's the one driving so his eyes can't wander off pretty far, especially in the barely sunlit grayness – and B – on his left, Sam is currently roleplaying a twelve year old girl that has her big emotional introspection accompanied by listening to Sarah McLahlan because her mean parents wouldn't let her buy ebola from the internet. Or something.

Point is, he's three hours into ostentatiously moping, trying to quietly terrorize Dean into making peace with Cas on the fly so it won't be awkward and problematique for him anymore. To Sam, Dean is just too inconvenient anytime he's inconvenient. And that, by order of nature herself, demands immediate and final stopping and ballot recounting also.

And Dean's point is, that it's not gonna happen anytime soon.

And Cas's point – assuming he’s still remotely capable of making those –  seems to be dead-set on that 50:50 face thing. And Dean regrets briefly glancing; with more or less the same intensity he regrets his whole life on the crap weather days his bones hurt harder than it should be legal.

Sam, in his hemhorroidal disturbance, reaches out to the tape deck and attempts to put anything on, but Dean feels like exactly zero of his tapes right now, so he swats Sam's hand off with a loud smack. Judging from the faces he gets for that, it's gotta be resonating in their heads a lot.

It's gonna be a long ride to Lousiana, way longer and more exhausting than the freshly puked from Purgatory one. In fact, the closer they get to Lafayette, the more tired he is and they won't start working the vetalas case until tomorrow night because apparently hanging around clubs on fridays is the new hanging downside of trees or whatever cool thing it was vetalas were doing before the rise of the all you can eat buffet of horny dicks certain they're gonna get reverse cowgirls for a two dollar drink. Or reverse cowboys. Fucking cheapskates. Some of them do have it coming. But in severe STDs, not in this.

In itself, waiting for the actual hunt really doesn't need to be a problem. It's just that Sam and Cas are fucked-bent on having it be one because—

“I said I'm going to stay with you and join you on hunts,” Cas finally snaps. „There's no need for this 'backup' as you call it, Dean.”

—Because that.

“Don't air quote it, man,” Dean mutters wearily, because of course Cas air quoted it.

“And there is absolutely no need for you to sleep in a vampire's camping truck when we have plenty of motels to pick from,” Cas rants on, zero deterred and plus ten determined, clearly not tuning into Dean's I don't wanna discuss that vibe.

Annnd because that too, yeah.

“Well I donno, I sure didn't want us to look like some sort of a hookup site for salvation army fashionistas threesome. You'll thank me later. Or you can do it now and shut up when you're done, how's that.”

“A vampire,” Sam interrupts his polished bitchface just to whine it out, which has to be peak brotherly care by his modern standards.

“You two asshats had no problem leaving me in vamp-vegas for a goddamn year,” Dean growls. “I am an adult adult and I need some me-time that isn't you time. And I'm gonna have awesome time while I'm at it. Sue me if that's a crime. Bother my lawyer.”

“You don’t have a lawyer”, says Sam.

“Aren’t you kind of a lawyer?” Dean remembers suddenly. “Or at least close enough for you two to bother each other and not me?”

“No, didn’t get to get there yet, thanks to you,” Sam mutters, also suddenly remembering the past life of his that was never meant to be.

“Oh, I’m sorry”, Dean whines. “Did I set your girlfriend on fire?”

“Fuck off.”

“I thought you missed me,” as if triggered by the word fuck, Cas drops the bomb with an evenness in his voice which hints at many things but Dean's brain is too stop-record screech to dissect them right now.

“What?” he blurts out, confused and affronted both.

“I thought you missed me,” Cas repeats, lower and harder like Dean's a stupid cat that won't spit out what it's chewing.

“Cas, I really don't wanna do this.”

“You kept praying to me to come back, Dean. After you were out of Purgatory. I heard you. Those were quite some prayers. Now you're putting yourself in real danger just to stay away from me. I don’t understand.”

Sam just stares at Dean, the always most helpful thing on the planet that he is. Thanks, Sam. Dean stares at the road. Cas stares daggers through the back of Dean's head. Poor Baby can't just leave this situation so she just keeps on rollin’. Nobody wins that day.

“That was before you told me you were lying your ass off just to kick me out last minute. Your subscription for my prayers and personal Jesus license have now expired, by the way. Like, the fuck does talking to you even do?”

“Fine!” Castiel snaps, so close to throwing his hands in the air for a grand effect but luckily thinking better of it since he's in a car that has a roof among other things. “I understand that you're angry—” he tries to start over, calmer, after a self-collecting breath.

“No, you don't,” Dean mutters.

“But you can't risk your life in the stupidest available way just to get back at me, Dean. Not after everything I've done to make sure you come back safe.”

Well at least he didn't include Sam in that „saving” part.

“You were there, man. You know Benny never double crossed me or you. What the exact fuck is your problem with him?”

A very angry squint-frown precedes the actual answer.

“You were his ticket to Earth. Now your life doesn't hold the same value.”

“Thanks, Cas. That's really swee—”

“You know that's not what I meant, Dean,” Cas growls in a tone that's clearly a final warning.

So final even Sam and his high horse must have heard since he steps in to defuse Cas.

“Cas, I'm not a fan of saying it, but Benny isn't a threat to Dean. I think the guy is kinda trying to settle,” he offers.

Dean smiles a little bit.

“See, Cas?”

“But I'm worried he might have more vamps trying to take him down because he pissed off every fang that ever knew him and then some. This is actual danger, Dean.”

“What?!” Castiel explodes in unbridled rage.

“Sam, have you ever wondered where do snitches go after they die?”

“Dean, you know I'm serious.”

“Ditches,” Dean concludes.

“When exactly were you going to tell me this?” Castiel asks coldly. “After you get killed by vampire avengers?”

“They're all taken care of, Cas. No mean jokes this time. Relax.”

“With your Winchester luck? I doubt it.”

“Oh, come on. It's not like you wouldn't bring me back even if something did happen.”

“Yes, even twice because first I would have personally destroyed you for being so reckless.”

“I know you would.”

“Guys,” Sam tries to placate, “we should all calm down and rethink how to handle it safely. It's not a good time for some jilted lovers tiff”, he begs.

Dean frowns then makes mocking faces at him to communicate that he's being a fucking douche.

“You're a fucking jilted lovers tiff,” he decides.

“We had sex, Dean,” Castiel states accusatorily.

Little does he know, he just broke Sam beyond repair. Now that the cat is out of the bag, the only thing Dean can do is to straighten some things out.

“Once,” he says, raising a finger to accentuate his point. “Cas was sure we were gonna die in the morning. We didn't, but there never was a follow up on that, so,” Dean shrugs.

“You weren't interested.”

“Says you,” Dean huffs. “I’m sorry, do you know me? Being interested in sex is in my top five pasttimes. You behaved like a brick on the other hand and I don’t know how to read concrete.”

“I don’t want to be here, good fucking God,” Sam finally yelps after a successful reboot of his brain.

Dean’s pretty sure nobody wants to be in this car right now and the only goddamn thing that could potentially make him ‘special’ right now is the fact currently Sam’s probably the only person in the Impala who has not lain his mouth on Cas’s dick. Hopefully.

Funnily enough, Cas could easily poof out without lethal injuries, but he’s dead set on staying, judging from the frown on his face that looks like a stock market crash diagram.

“I didn’t exactly see you giving me any signs.”

And set on having this conversation.

“I’m not a cat, I don’t go into heats, Cas. Can we talk about it somewhere more private? Later? Cuz everybody here wants to fucking die right now.”

“Private?” Cas asks. “If you want privacy to talk then why do you refuse to book a room with me?”

“We don’t need to share a room to have a conversation. Unless what you want it to end with is getting back on track with that last night on Earth thing we had that one time.”

“Jesus Christ,” Sam cries.

“Grow up and stow your crap, Sam,” Cas says unexpectedly before Dean could even bother to serve anything in a similar note.

Dean is so thrown off his equilibrium by that he puts the car to an abrupt halt. Only because he’s too deeply wired to not crash the Impala into the first available so he won’t accidentally kill Sam.

That is, if Cas’s words haven’t obliterated him already. He glances at him, just in case. Speechless as holily commanded by the celestial – potentially horny – wrath from the back seat, but at least he’s still breathing.

“Um,” he says, because someone’s gotta, because he’s still the big brother in this demented equation. “Cas, what the fuck was that?”

“Should you, of all people, really need me to be this blunt – now that the worst affairs have been settled, we could pick up where we left off, and hopefully reach a mutual understanding regarding the nature of our relationship so that doubt no longer hinders you. If it’s still something that interests you, of course. Would that be clear and direct enough, Dean?”

Well, that was… long? Long enough citations are probably needed, but, uh, yeah. S’ gotta be addressed immediately or else.

“Cas, that was 2010 and we have 2012 now.”

“It was 2012 when you prayed to me in Purgatory and it was 2012 four days ago. Granted, your feelings towards me might be very complicated, but I still can sense and read your longing,” Cas says with a weary sigh.

“Stop smelling my longing,” Dean responds with a wearier one. “And I don’t have to explain myself to you.”

“But I should explain myself to you.”

“I’m real fed up with your explanations, you know that? And we don’t got time for that, either. We need to get to Lafayette because we got a case waiting to get solved.”

“It’s because he’s waiting there for you, isn’t it,” Cas says sadly; not a question. A statement.

Dean doesn’t need to respond. Doesn’t feel like it, too.

Yeah. It’s good to actually have someone waiting for you; someone there.

Maybe it’s not that complicated, after all. Maybe it doesn’t have to be.

Dean starts the car. He’s got a place to go to.

The sound apparently wakes Sam from his stupor. His bright idea of the day, he turns the radio on before the awkward silence can make the universe inside of the Impala collapse on itself and on all three of them. Too late for Dean to react now; might as well get a load of the weather report.

In the back seat, Cas flicks his wrist subtly and the monotone voice sharply cuts off into static for a moment and the frequency bar moves elsewhere on its’ – or rather, Cas’s – own.  Some solitary synthesiser-made sounds drop one after another like tiny steps and Dean realizes he definitely has heard this song before at some point in his life as eighties one hit wonders ain’t no strangers to him. Oh well. Might as well not get any of the wea—

Looking from a window above, it’s like a story of love… Can you hear me?

Is he fucking kidding?!

Came back only yesterday, I’m moving farther away.... Want you near me…

“Are you fucking kidding?” Dean cries out, incredulous.

Tries to turn the radio off but it just won’t die.

All I needed was the love you gave— “You want melodramatic? I’ll give you melodramatic.” —All I needed for another day — Dean reaches out for his phone and starts typing angrily — and all I ever knew, only you.

He puts on good ol’ Fish and hopes it’s gonna be louder than Cas’s synth-pop loving. And starts driving towards where he wants to be cause he’s tired of dancing.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 262: A Fierce Bad Rabbit

Previously on BnHA: The hospital raid squad, which had two jobs consisting of (1) not letting Ujiko get away, and (2) not letting any of the Noumu break free to go ravage the countryside, impressively failed at both of these tasks (or so I assume) in a remarkably short amount of time. The EndeavorZawaMicLock squad were all occupied with having a very destructive fight in the hospital lobby, leaving my girl Miruko, Goddess of Courage and First of Her Name, to do pretty much all the heavy lifting, which, fine!! Except that Ujiko remembered that he had a bunch of High End Noumus just floating there waiting to be activated, and he was all “!!” and fucking activated them, and like five of them went after Miruko all at once and smashed her into a bunch of machinery and glass tubes, which frankly should have killed her but it didn’t because she’s a fucking boss. But now it’s just her (and Crust, who might do something too, but for now JURY’S STILL OUT) against all these guys while Ujiko speeds off to grab Tomura and abscond. So basically everything that could go wrong has already gone wrong so UH. OKAY.

Today on BnHA: Miruko kicks ass. Then she checks her watch and sees that there’s still time for her to kick more ass, so she does. Then there is still time, because this chapter is all about her kicking ass! So she kicks even more ass!! It’s great!! I have no complaints!! She decapitates a man with her thighs!! That’s a thing that really happens!! Also she loses an arm but WHO HASN’T LOST AND/OR BROKEN THEIR ARMS IN THIS SERIES, REALLY. Everyone is doing it. Somehow she manages to make it look cool because Miruko. Miruko can strangle a man with a cordless phone. She can kill two stones with one bird. Miruko makes onions cry. Death once had a near-Miruko experience. Mirukoooooooo. Anyway the chapter ends with Skeptic warning everyone at The Ol’ Villain Hotel that the heroes are coming, so basically WELCOME BACK, EVERYONE, this manga is back with a vengeance.

guys I’m gonna try to do this recap fast because I’m seeing Heroes Rising tonight at 7:30! and I’m so excited! and for those that asked, yes I do plan on doing some kind of write-up about it, though it’ll all be from memory after the fact so we’ll see how that goes. but !! I’ve waited 84 years for this ahhhhh but anyway so in the meantime let’s see what new and creative ways our heroes are finding to screw this up even more

(ETA: I did it but this thing isn’t edited for shit lol. after I get back I’ll give it a more thorough readthrough so sorry if I missed any really obvious errors! also there are probably way more exclamation points than usual which may or may not be a plus or minus.)

look at this helpful announcement

High End Noumu approaching, everyone. you have been warned. just in case you somehow failed to notice?? IT’S RIGHT THERE Y’ALL LOOK OUT

lmao FINALLY

MORE HEROES. YOU ALL CERTAINLY TOOK YOUR FUCKING TIME, but hey welcome to the party. and none of that “I don’t see how that’s a party” sassy shit either. you all know what I’m talking about so get out there and have fun

so they’re standing there all “it’s a talking Noumu!” and YEAH. that’s what I’ve been fucking trying to tell you. thank god someone finally fucking said it out loud so that hopefully the EZML squad can finally take notice of this as well. like guys. bigger fish?! get to frying!!

so now Crust is all “there are more of them ahead, Miruko’s in danger!” which, again, thanks for finally letting everyone else in on this formerly exclusive scoop there pal. ‘preciate it

I... really do not understand Crust’s quirk at all. I’m just gonna own up to it

what is this. what does “zuga” mean fx-wise. why did those scale things on his arms get so big. what are they made of. what’s happening

oh it turns out that if you scroll and read more instead of pausing for ages to ask dumb questions, the thing you were asking about might actually be explained in great detail in the very next panel

but what are they made out of though. and why “Crust”?? ah well I suppose that’s a question for someone who actually cares more than I do

by the way the quality of this scan is actually really good so far, I gotta say. we’re only two pages in, true, but they either cleaned this up really nicely, or this was a much higher-quality scan than usual. either way I am appreciative!

lol this poor Noumu is shook

what did I name you two weeks ago, again? Rusty?? anyways he’s doing his best you guys. gambare my dude, though actually you do need to die, so that’s too bad though

Crust is all “you pitiful living corpse!” with tears in his eyes because he’s dramatic! but jokes aside I do appreciate that he has compassion for these monsters who are all still basically innocent victims at the end of the day

does anyone else actually hear that funny-sounding anime narrator guy in your head nowadays when you read panels like this lol

I can hear the voice so clearly and it’s great

only ten times the strength of a normal human, guys. that’s actually not that bad. I’m only half joking lol. because obviously your average hero is going to be much stronger than a so-called “normal” person too, yes? and I’m pretty sure Miruko has the strength of like 30 humans but I may be overestimating her just slightly but am I though

oh lol I apparently did not learn my lesson about doing commentary before I’m done reading hahaha

so High Ends are on a different tier of their own above even the “high” tier. well that’s just. yeah that sounds more like the “we’re still fucked” update that I was expecting

oh wait, seriously??

are you telling me that all of the High Ends were actually cultivated from villains? so maybe not completely innocent, then? is this Horikoshi’s way of trying to make us feel marginally better about the fact that the heroes are shortly henceforth going to have to exterminate these guys with great prejudice? I mean they’re still basically slaves to Ujiko’s programming now though so that sucks

also I missed this earlier but the narration here basically just confirmed that Noumu are all made from corpses. which I kind of suspected, but the still-very-much-alive Tomura would then be a glaring contradiction to that, no? or is that why he’s so special. anyway I do appreciate that we’re getting a lot of much-awaited answers in this Noumu arc, but some of this is also just raising more questions. gotta be patient I guess

speaking of Tomura, Ujiko’s back in the Tomura room, so. I assume some absconding is soon to occur

oh shit!! so there’s another panel explaining that “artificial transplant of quirks” requires surgery and then three months of stabilization time following that. sooooo I’m pretty sure this mofo just confirmed that he gave Tomura some shiny additional new quirks, so that’s nice! that’s real fucking great! I know we were all eyeing Tomura skeptically and thinking to ourselves “this is almost just right, but needs more death”

wait, what?

“I was already dead anyway” meaning that he knows there’s no way out for him? and so he doesn’t have a secret way out of the lab?? ??? can that really be true?? our intrepid heroes actually did their job right and the villains had no contingency plan?? oh my god I am so terrified of letting my guard down lmao I still refuse to believe this at all

and is that Tomura who’s at 70% stabilization? that would seem to fit with the timeline we were given. holy shit is he unboxing him early fsdfkjalsdk are we about to go from “fucked” to “exorbitantly fucked”

and why am I strangely excited about it sob!!

HAHAHAHA OH GOD

so this is how liberty dies. with a beep

also fuck you all, now it’s at 71%?! couldn’t leave it at a nice even number for us, could you? you just had to throw that extra percent in there at the last moment to fuck with us all

anyway did you all catch how fucking ripped he was there though? like boiiii whaaaaat. clearly his abs are already at 100%

OH MY GOD

DOES NOTHING FUCKING FAZE THIS BEAUTIFUL, RULE-BREAKING MOTH

HAHAHA

RIGHT??

HOLY FUCKING MOLY

friendly reminder that Dabi was all good and ready to throw down with both Endeavor and Hawks (who were admittedly weakened by that point) that one time a while back, but then Miruko showed up and he was all “lol nope I think the fuck not” and warped out of there. Dabi, whose quirk is so powerful that its only apparent downside is the fact that it roasts him alive as well. that Dabi took one look at Miruko and decided he likes having his spine intact and fucking vamoosed, because that is the smart fucking thing to do when this girl shows up smiling at you the way that she is smiling at these Noumu now

anyway. fucking Ujiko knew he needed at least five High Ends to even stand a chance of slowing her down, is all I’m saying. y’all better respect the FUCK out of Miruko, everyone. it’s the law

anyway. so. quirk: bunny. can smash rl gud

someone needs to ask Horikoshi the fuck kind of rabbits he has been hanging out with. applied that “and more!” part pretty fucking liberally huh. WHO DID YOU SAY TRIX WERE FOR AGAIN, CHILDREN??

NOBODY THROWS MIRUKO IN THE BRIAR PATCH AND GETS AWAY WITH IT

fffwhatttttttttt

that would be our good buddy Max Rebo. so that’s definitely not an elephant trunk-like thing then. we may need a new name for you

on a side note, I never thought we’d meet another character who looks more like Katsuki than Mitsuki does, and yet every damn week Miruko is proving me wrong. goddamn she is great

lmao wait maybe that wasn’t Max at all, but Jester. because this is clearly Max over here

so Girl!Noumu is a water bender, Jester can do... something weird with his hair, and Max can do anything an elephant can do if that elephant was also powered by steam. nice

HAHAHA BUT MIRUKO IS ALL “KICK!!!”

HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK!!!

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT. I WOULD READ AN ENTIRE MANGA OF JUST THIS LMAO THIS IS TOO MUCH ADRENALINE I CAN’T

JESTER’S WEIRD SPIKY ROCK HAIR IS SLICING HER ARM AND SHE’S ALL “THAT HURTS YOU JERK!!!!” AND GETTING READY TO FREAKING PILEDRIVE HIM I CAN’T, THOUGH!?

SDKFJLDKSJFLKJ

HER FATHER PEPPY TAUGHT HER THAT. BARREL ROLL ALL OVER THESE BITCHES!!

WHAT THE FUCK

FUCKING QUIRKS!!!! THOUGH!!!! WILLLLLLLLLD

SDKFJLAS;DHK OH MY GOD OH SHIT

real talk this is the scariest fucking quirk I’ve ever seen I was like what the fuck looking at her arm and then I saw him doing the twisty hand gesture and just. fuck. YOU’RE NOT CRIMSON RIOT AT ALL YOU’RE SOME PSYCHO TELEKINETIC BITCH AND I FUCKING HATE YOU!!

NO!!!!!

fuck fuck fuck. I’M SURE HER ARM’S GOING TO BE JUST FINE AND DANDY AFTER THIS GUYS, DON’T WORRY. THIS MANGA HAS SUCH A SERENE AND TRANQUIL HISTORY WITH ARMS. ISN’T THAT RIGHT DEKU

though on the plus side, if she does lose that arm we can count on her to somehow instantly become like 50x more attractive, which I’m pretty sure might cause the very fabric of the universe to unravel but it would be worth it

(ETA: SHE DID AND IT WAS!!)

MADAME PRESIDENT!! MY QUEEN

OH HELL YERRRRRR

fucking hell guys I’m running out of exclamation points and excited things to say here. AND SHE JUST KEEPS GOING! LIKE HER MOM THE ENERGIZER BUNNY BEFORE HER

I’M SORRY UJIKO DID YOU THINK FIVE HIGH ENDS WAS ENOUGH?! MAYBE NEXT TIME WE MAKE IT TEN, HOW ABOUT THAT. FUCK OFF

lmao holy shit I can’t stop laughingggg

well Crimson, at least you get to die happy. is she literally going to crush his face between her thighs. is this entire chapter just one big prank on me. if Miruko was the protagonist would this series have ended in the first chapter. trick question, the answer is it never would have started to begin with because she would have killed All for One years ago!! how much would it cost to hire Miruko to come kick away all of my problems for me

hello good afternoon everyone this is a real panel that really happened in this manga

I don’t even know what to say about anything anymore

sob she’s all “YEAH RIGHT” and SNAPPING HIS FUCKING NECK WITH A FUCKING TRIANGLE CHOKE, THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING, FUCKING LOOK!! AT!! THIS!!!

we’re not even gonna make it to 300 chapters. Horikoshi held off for as long as he could, but eventually Miruko couldn’t be contained any longer and he had to unleash her and she instantly went and reckt every last fucking bad guy out there until there was nothing left. who are the kids even going to fight. nobody that’s who. go back to school kids

SON OF A BITCH WHAT IS HAPPENING

THIS IS THE MOST VIOLENT THING I HAVE EVER FUCKING SEEN AND YET SOMEHOW I SWEAR I CAN HEAR ANGELS SINGING. RESPLENDENT

SOBBING!!!!

“S’POSE I SHOULD GET THIS ANNOYING THING CHECKED OUT BEFORE I BLEED TO DEATH OR SOME BULLSHIT.” WHAT AN INCONVENIENCE. JUST A FUCKING FLESH WOUND. NOBODY USES ARMS THESE DAYS ANYWAY

“IF THE ONLY WAY TO STOP YOU IS BY CRUSHING YOUR HEADS THIS WILL BE WAY EASIER THAN HOLDING BACK ON A NORMAL VILLAIN.” SOB THIS IS MIRUKO’S WORLD AND WE’RE ALL JUST BEGRUDGINGLY ALLOWED TO EXIST IN IT. MY BARONESS

DID YOU JUST TOURNIQUET YOUR DISMEMBERED FUCKING LIMB WITH YOUR OWN FUCKING HAIR ONE-HANDED FFCKCK KCKCLK JUST MIRUKO THINGS

Miruko also saw Horikoshi getting ready to end the chapter after 17 pages and was like “EXCUSE YOU THERE” and he backed off because he actually likes having a fucking head thank you very much

LMAO AND NOW OF ALL TIMES WE’RE CUTTING BACK TO THE OL’ VILLAIN RESORT. SIGH

Skeptic seems to have finally cottoned on to them being in some kind of trouble. huh

how does he know it was Jin who screwed up?? did he realize that Hawks betrayed them oh shit!?!

OOP HE’S SOUNDING THE ALARM

AND THE CHAPTER IS ENDING. BUT I’M NOT DONE SCREAMING. AHHHHHH well anyways I’m off to watch my children kick lots of ass on the big screen. assuming I can get this posted in time with zero editing whatsoever lol I’ve got like... an hour. WE SHALL SEE!

(ETA: we did it lol just barely! this whole thing is probably a giant mess but oh well! Mirukoooooo)

[icharchivist]

hello icha!! i finally got around to finishing the stranger haha,, by which i mean i just watched it today. was veryyyy excited for it as i really like the poster design for this one. anyways. this event starting w/ the sort of portrait format or whatever / that narration is like. god. threw me right back to autumn troupe. I kind of love that the storytelling format itself is so distinct for autumn! the moment I realized it was omi I started getting teary… like oh man oh man… omi…. And the connection with him taking photos! ahh!! now that I think about it… omi kind of seems a bit like early version tsumugi, huh? also I keep forgetting this man is a college student lol. suspension of disbelief I suppose. onto the play i think like. mankai should invest in a fainting courch for tsuzuru. i also went to watch the play and 1) im betting yuki had a hell of a time costume design wise like the vines on the body? such fun costuming wise and 2) the ethical implications of whatever this play has,,, fun fun. tsuzuru was clearly having some kind of thoughts. i love zeros design and am always up for a3 characters crossdressing bc 1) i think its fun and 2) the costume design. i also dearly wish this whole thing was animated bc I feel like it’d be o fun to see taichi act as zero. or at least I hope this event gets full voiced one day... moving on to the scene where omi adds soy sauce to the paella I know it’s just like haha homare funny so lets five him a lil bit but like everyone in autumn troupe making their comments on the paella and like homare just jumping in. homare autumn troupe besties. just thinking. also the way they just r like. no no no omi it’s fine if u made a mistake!! it’s ok! we like it (you) anyways <3 it’s got it’s own special taste. something something omi’s perfectly pleasant as he is now but even if he weren’t on his a-game and was dealing with all of the biker gang stuff they would love him just as hard. another thing that got me was omi telling banri that he’ll give him something sweet so juza will stop grinding his teeth in his sleep… guys… guys you’ll give him cavities…. mb omi is a college student after all lol.

anyways when i saw the actual costumes. appreciative of them, i like the lil circuit-esque detailing on banri’s outfit, and that sakyo and taichi (nine and zero) both share that like collar detail? its very symbolic and probably also literal but its a nice way to sort of signify their relation to each other visually! also sakyo just looks nice. seeing him without glasses is so great. whoever thought up the like two mole detail for him was doing gods work.

something that confused me was ryo mistaking juza for nachi for a split second? like. does juza… look similar to nachi? or was it just that ryo only heard juzas voice and made that mistake. if it’s appearance wise too. kumon nachi confirmed. I’m joking lol bc I feel like I would’ve heard at least something abt it in one of the like small conversation comments, plus that doesnt seem like itd fit summer troupes style and kumon is for sure the wrong age… but still.

i really like how for this event, the roles for taichi and omi were kinda reversed. and taichis just so like. idk. smiley. rly lifts ur spirits. its kind of nice how this event contrasts to that cg where taichi is crying on omi. I also think like. idk. considering the story of the stranger. wolf gives zero a sense of purpose and life and I think that zero helps wolf lose his apathy. it’s about “the stranger” and the ending makes him like… not a stranger, right? because he’s got a companion. in the same way, taichi brings omi out of his emotional isolation. the picture taking! also the stickers coming back… thats such a good setup! the found family of it all!!

when he was trying to work out zeros character as soon as taichi mentioned a sharp speaking style I KNEW it was Yuki… yuki would never be as honest as zero is though lol… to me i imagine she’s got a sort of juza internal monologue feel? anyways. the taichi yuki dynamic intrigues me. havent yet decided how I feel abt it but when I do… yes. sorry that I make literally no sense. I think it’s very obvious that yuki is my fav chara kind of? I’m just. hmmm it makes me think! I’ve been monologuing to myself abt the yuki and juza dynamic lately which, to my a3 knowledge so far, doesn’t exist, but its ok bc I’ll make it exist! uhhh anyways this event was very good i liked the pacing. i think it didnt drag too hard and it really properly honed in on just omi and taichi, which was quite nice. they really did a lot for just an event!

time to listen to the event song,,, ok so. ah. i rly enjoyed just for myself it was very much to my taste so. out of curiousity i was like ok lemme look up the composer / producer AND IT WAS YUYOYUPPE....... that guy is like!!!! one of my FAV producers ever!!!!!! i know him from like. his vocaloid days and god leia is still one of my fav songs to this day...! this knowledge gives me so much joy omg!!! like wow!! wowwww!!! like i knew yuyoyuppe was out there doing other stuff (i know he worked on a lot of babymetal music which is cool) but like idk. to suddenly encounter it like this. heheh.... its so nice! made me soooo happy. going to relisten to leia now haha

WAIT ONE MORE THING. i was like "haha let me look at other songs i remember liking a lot" which. for me was rakuen oasis and don't cry. anyways. rakuen oasis is ALSO by yuyoyuppe???? oh my god!!! oh my god... sigh. feel like im in heaven.

OH HI FRIEND!! so good to see you with an a3 update!! :D

godd yeah The Stranger started so strongly and the idea to still incorporate portraits in his story was really something to make us cry!

And linking Omi and Tsumugi like this is pretty interesting :O <hat is your reasoning exactly? :O

For the fainting couch for Tsuzuru LMAO and i'm letting you know there's a webcomics that addresses it in Act 2 (hough there's no spoilers aside from the fact Chikage is here)

Im glad you liked the costume and the play!!! yeah i love the designs and it is always a blast to see them this into it, and yeaaah Tsuzuru has thoughts huh. It'll get voiced sooner than later hopefully and there we'll see more in details :3c but also that's what made the seiyuu live so fun bc they perform the songs in play cosplay and replay a bit of the play everytime and it's *chief kiss*

HOMARE AUTUMN TROUPE SOLIDARITY YES. LOVING IT.

And yeah the scene itself was so cute TwT they all want to reassure Omi and be there for him it's so sweet :( but yeah i love how you say it all, Omiimi TwT

and dLKFJDFLKJFDFD Giving Juza cavities is the price to pay for sleep i guess??

yeah agreed on the costume they all look so cool! and nice catch on how those three seem linked like that with their costumes, Yuki (and the designers) does such a good job! and god yeah for Sakyo.. yeah. He has sucha good design dLKJFDF

aND DLKFJD yeah no Juza is supposed to look like Nachi physically, but mostly his face? like i think Nachi was had green hair? we see a sprite of him in a future story, and yeah, everything is in the eyebrows. so Kumon should be safe? Omi mentions he sees a lot of Nachi in Juza, and while it is mostly due to their passions i think, the fact they're also rough looking guy with a heart of gold must play a part as well. but yeah, he does look like Nachi a bit.

and i love your deeper analysis of the event yeah!!

I feel like Taichi is really an emotional core of the troupe in the sense that is, he tends to catch on what others are feelings easily. And he uses it in the early chapters to ease off the tensions and stuff, but he was being held back by knowing he was deceiving them. So now that he's more free, he can be more of himself. but yeah i also love the contrast with how Omi was the one to help Taichi through his breakdown and guilt, and now it's the other way around, it's Taichi helping him through it. and the parallelism between the play and their dynamic is spot on imo! well said!!

and god yeah the sticker things made me cry sO HARD, and the pictures! and everything!! sobs it's such a sweet found family i'm going to cry :(

And! i love what you say about Yuki, Taichi and Juza on this one. I love that Taichi keeps bringing it back to "that childhood friend" and it's always like. so obvious who it is for us rip. But it can make you wonder if Yuki was more honest as a kiddo when Taichi knew him, though now he's clearly not. I love the mention of how Zero is more like Juza's internal speech (which, if anything is another argument about why you should let Juza wear a dress, cOWARD)

but also your mention of the Yuki and Juza thing, while i can't think of them having a dynamic per se yet, but i actually wrote a post during my reread about how i was baffled at the fact they treated Muku the same way?? like both of them tried to push Muku away because they were scared of how people would react if they say pure, sweet Muku was associated to them. And i find it fascinating because i guess those two are pretty aware of how the world see them, and it used to stop them from fully allowing them to be themselves.

I also find it relevant with the fact Yuki says in his personal song that while all of this way people judge him weight on him, he rather be himself, and "I want to love myself". Meanwhile we have Juza who's also aware of the way people judge him and it weight on him, and he wants to change himself from this person he hates, this self loathing - and in a way, he can grow in a way to be "someone" he may not hate, even on stage. I feel like those two have quite a bit in common in this way of being rejected by their peers in some sort of way.

I really want them to share some stuff at some point because there's really a groundwork on it all :(

But i'm really glad you liked that event!! agreed on the pacing and i do love what it brings to the characters! it really fleshes them out and have them move forward a little and it's pretty sweet.

AND OMG THAT'S SO COOL FOR THE SONG!! i'm so glad you liked it, but that's incredible it turned out to be from one of your fav producer!!! ahah sometimes life is like that where you end up finding the stuff you loved back into new stuff! and the fact Rakuen Oasis was from him as well... that's so cool!!! just, so so cool!

im pretty sure he has more songs going forward so i hope you'll enjoy the ride even more!!

thank you once again for sharing your thoughts about a3 :3c it always makes me so happy to see them!!!

Thank youu <3 have a good day :3c