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niningtori · 1 year ago

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let me into your world | chapter two: you've been on my mind

pairing(s): choi beomgyu x you, choi soobin x you

summary: it's been 4 years since your last encounter with beomgyu, and you're happily engaged to soobin. you're ready to get married to the love of your life, but are soulmate ties really so easy to break?

genre(s): romance, angst, angst with a happy ending (?), soulmate au

word count: 2.8k

notes: SURPRISE! i know this is a really quick update, but i'm so geeked by txt tour dates i wanted to get something out to celebrate lmao. i hope you all like where this story is going. truly, i do. also, there's some suggestive stuff in this chapter and the next. nothing explicit, but i want to warn everybody. see ending for more notes!

4 years later

you're nervous. your company is joining up with your sister branch and you're torn between excitement and trepidation. your company is really pushing the "unity" narrative and you can't help but grimace at the happy horseshit they're spewing about how the merge won't affect the team dynamic, because it almost certainly will, and you dread having to walk on eggshells with new coworkers.

your friend and coworker, danbi, is currently greeting your new coworkers with alarming generosity. it's not that she isn't friendly, because she is, but she's enthusiastic in a way you did not expect.

"why are you so chipper today?" you ask, genuinely curious.

"you haven't heard? one of our new recruits is supposedly criminally sexy. i'd hate to leave a bad impression on anybody and have him not like me," she explains and it all makes sense to you now.

"so you're only acting nice to potentially get some dick?" you ask.

"pretty much, yeah." you both laugh and you shake your head.

"i just don't get you," you joke.

"of course you don't," she quips, rolling her eyes. "not everybody is head over heels in love with their super hot fiancé." you blush at this. it's been 4 years with soobin, but you're still very much in love.

"shut up," you say, face tinged red.

"wait! oh god, that must be him," danbi whispers and you shake your head while opting to steal a glance behind you to catch a look at her next victim. what you see makes your sarcastic comment catch in your throat.

you knew soulmate ties weren't easy to break, but you never imagined you'd see him here. you had gotten incredibly comfortable with the thought of never seeing him again, actually. but there he stands, as tall and good-looking as ever. his hair is shorter than it used to be, though, revealing the pretty pink seal you've tried your hardest to forget, but never fully can. there's a moment before he sees you too, and you relish in it before his eyes make his way to you. when they do, it's like you're completely frozen. you should avert your gaze, but it's almost as if you have to look at him. when he sees you, his eyes widen in surprise, not unlike the first time he saw you. however, his second response is unreadable, completely differing from the demeaning look he once gave you all those years ago.

"is that a seal behind his ear? damn it," danbi curses, whisking you away from your entrancement and back into cold, hard reality. you stare is effectively torn away from him and back to your friend.

"i guess so," you manage to squeak out.

"shit, he's coming! hold on, do i look pretty? is my makeup smudged?" she says, primping her hair and clearing her throat.

"you look fine." she doesn't seem to notice how fucking uncomfortable you are as beomgyu makes his way over to you both.

"hi," he says, baritone resonating somewhere deep in your bones.

"i'm danbi!"

"i'm beomgyu," he answers perfunctorily, eyes never leaving you. you look away before introducing yourself as if he didn't have proof of your existence on his skin. he shakes your hand. the pure electricity you feel reverberates from the tips of your fingers straight to your heart. you carefully tuck the feeling in your back pocket — you will deal with it later. danbi clears her throat and snaps both of you back to reality.

"do you two know each other?" she asks suspiciously.

"you could say that,” he chuckles. “you could even say we're —"

"we were classmates in our senior year of college!" you interject, not wanting a single soul to know about your entanglement. beomgyu doesn't shoot down your little charade though, he just softly smiles as if watching a show and you hate him for it.

"classmates... oh that makes sense. wait, didn't you meet soobin that same year?"

"soobin?" beomgyu asks.

"her fiancé!" she says. almost robotically, you raise your left hand and show him your ring. you don't know why you do this. maybe to prove that you're doing just fine without him? you don't know, really. you don't want to know.

beomgyu doesn't seem surprised in the slightest. his eyes linger on your ring for a moment too long, but that could just be in your head. what you don't know is that he knew soobin had proposed the exact moment you did. if he didn't figure it out from the peace you felt and just how in love with soobin you really are, he would've found out from your instagram, anyway. as it stands, he feels the love you have for soobin every day and it's enough to make him want to swallow himself whole.

"you're engaged now? congratulations."

"what about you, beomgyu? are you seeing anyone?" danbi asks shamelessly. you don't intend for your ears to perk up at this, but they most certainly do.

"me? no, nothing like that," he says.

"that sounds about right," you mumble bitterly.

"what was that?" danbi asks. you want to astral project and wring your own neck right about now, but instead you settle for:

"oh, it's nothing. beomgyu just isn't the settling type," you shrug, feigning innocence.

"i'd settle for the right person," he says pointedly. you almost want to laugh at that, but you won't deny that deep down, it still kind of hurts. he had effectively stomped on your heart — on your sincerity — and the flippancy with which he says he would be with the right person cuts deep. you almost wonder if he means to hurt you even more than he already has, but that would imply he cares enough to hurt you in the first place. you won't delude yourself into thinking you could hold space in his heart. not anymore, anyway.

"there's someone for everyone," you say plainly, hoping to end the conversation there.

"yeah, no kidding," she says, wiggling her fingers as her cobalt blue seal sits perfectly on the back of her hand. "know anybody with this seal?" she asks beomgyu.

"i do not," he says with a polite smile.

"oh well, having a soulmate doesn't mean you have to be with them," she hints.

"i don't know, i think having a seal is pretty definite," he shrugs, and you wonder how and why the conversation has turned so serious. you feel like he's just bullshitting her so she'll stop hitting on him, but the callousness with which he speaks about fate when he did what he did still stings. it's like a scab that won't fully heal, and he's picking away at it with each and every word. you want to knock on his head and see exactly what the fuck is going on in there, but instead, you sit in silence.

"oh no, it's time for our meeting! it was nice talking to you, beomgyu! i hope we can talk more in the future," danbi says.

"same to you," he answers noncommittally.

the meeting is awkward, to say the least. you can't get beomgyu's words out of your head to the point where you don't even feel his gaze searing into you. if it's not awkward enough as it is — and it is — your boss, sooyoung, has the bright idea to pair people from the opposing branches together to build company morale and break the ice.

you already know who will be your partner, because of course he will be, but that doesn't mean that you're still hoping beyond hope that you're wrong. you are not. when sooyoung calls your name and beomgyu's shortly thereafter, you want to drop to your knees and yell at the universe to stop tormenting you, but you do nothing of the sort and give a terse smile instead. beomgyu's expression is, again, unreadable. you have to wonder how much he hates the idea of being paired up with you, but you try not to dwell on it.

beomgyu is, of course, not disappointed. he's the farthest thing from disappointed, to be clear. his heart almost jumps out of his chest when he hears that you'll be paired together, but he keeps a lid on his emotions. he kind of knew that you'd be his partner, but he's still ecstatic. if fate wants to bind you together, he won't do a thing to stop it. not anymore. as you're walking around the building and showing beomgyu around, you try to keep conversation simple and clean, but he seems hellbent on making you uncomfortable when he asks you how you've been.

"good, i guess," you reply. he wants you to ask how he's been doing so he can tell you just how bad it's been for him. he wants to tell you how much he regrets throwing away your heart when you held it out for him all those years ago and how he didn't know that he'd end up feeling every bit of happiness you have. he's aching to tell you how much he aches, how much he yearns. the words are on the tip of his tongue, but you don't ask. you just show him where the fucking copy room is.

you come home from work looking more haggard than you have in a long, long time.

"hey, baby," soobin croons as you slip your shoes off and sigh.

"hi," you say. he can sense your tension immediately.

"what's wrong, my love?"

"you'll never believe who my new coworker is," you say, cutting straight to the point.

"beomgyu?"

"what the hell?" you giggle in disbelief. "how'd you know?"

"easy, there's only one person who could tire you out like this," he says with a shrug.

"not true. you tire me out like this too," you say suggestively, kissing his neck, earning a blush from the boy. "i'm sorry, i know us working together must make you uncomfortable."

"hey, what did we say about you apologizing for things that aren't your fault?"

"i know, i just hate that he's back in my life."

"i'm okay with it. it's just work, after all. as long as you don't leave me for him," he jokes, but there's a slight edge to his voice only you would notice.

"never. i love you and only you," you say, grabbing his big hand and placing it in yours.

"i believe you."

"well, that was easy," you smile. "i mean every word." you place your head on his shoulder and you want to stay like this forever. just you and him in your own little world, no one else.

interactions with beomgyu stay cordial and distant, though not for lack of trying on his part. he asks what you've been up to, if you've heard of certain bands and songs, if you miss your college days at all, and by extension, if you miss him too. he already knows that you don't, if the contentment you've felt for the past 4 years is any indication of your state of mind, but that doesn't change the fact that he wants to ask.

you want to know what game he's playing at. he had told you in no uncertain terms that he did not want anything to do with you, but it feels like he's just fucking with you at this point. his kindness feels a lot deeper than mere coworker cordiality, but you can't pinpoint any one comment as inappropriate, so you can't very well blow up on him and ask what his problem is. that doesn't change the fact that you want to, though. you want to ask why he's so damn calm and why you can't get a read on his intentions. you almost wonder if he's just trying to be friends again, but that seems extremely cruel of him after what he did to you. you don't want to believe that he'd jump through the hoops he's jumping through just to rekindle a friendship that was doomed from the start, but what else could it possibly be? honestly? it doesn't even matter to you, or it shouldn't, anyway. he made his choice all those years ago, and you'll let him live with it forever.

beomgyu doesn’t want to live with it. he thinks he’s lived with it for long enough, actually. when you brush off his advances, parts of his heart he didn’t even know still existed die. it’s throbbing so hard at this moment, as he listens to you talk to soobin on the phone while you’re stuck in the same elevator, that it actually feels numb. he doesn’t quite catch what soobin says to you, but he does catch your laugh that he’s missed so damn much in response to it.

“mmm,” you hum. “i love you, too. i’ll see you soon, okay? mhmm, bye.”

he wishes your dopey smile would drop after the call, but it doesn’t. he thinks you’re actually fucking humming under your breath, – that’s how happy you are. he feels familiar pains in his chest and watches your expression for a semblance of a reaction, but you remain perfectly unfazed. you barely even seem to notice that he’s in the same elevator as him, actually. he clears his throat and waits for you to glance his way, but you never do. you just keep humming a tune he wish he knew.

it starts off negligibly. first, you watch soobin as he sometimes sits dazedly, even during conversation. your attempts to pull him back to you are futile, but you give it a good, honest try anyway. second, he's working overtime, needlessly so. it's like he's trying to work himself to death. when asked, he shrugs it off and says he's busy. third, and most notably, he's colder than he's ever been, resisting your advances on him. his kisses are fleeting and you feel his hesitation when you suggest doing something more, so you don't push. things stay in this odd sense of limbo for a week or so before you finally can't take it anymore.

"what's wrong, baby?" you ask one night on the loveseat you share, unable to take how indifferent he's been lately.

"nothing, babe. i'm just tired these days," smiling weakly. you can understand that, you think. seeing beomgyu every day has worn you out. you're ready to accept his explanation as his fingers lace with yours and you can feel yourself calming down before the anxiety comes back full force — he isn't gently rubbing his thumb across yours the way he usually does.

you can feel him slipping away and you don't know why, but you have a guess you don't dare to vocalize.

"do you not love me anymore?" you try.

"what? no," he dismisses.

"why are you doing this then? it feels like you're pushing me away and you won't tell me why. how can we fix it if you won't communicate with me?" and your voice is even weaker than you thought it would be.

"i'm not trying to do anything!" he snaps and you wince. he immediately looks sorrier than you've ever seen him.

"listen, i love you, i really do. i-i just... i'm not in love with you anymore." the silence is excruciating — almost as excruciating as the pain in your heart. your fingers unlace with his and you immediately regret it. your next question is quiet, so quiet it's almost inaudible, but he hears it all the same.

"you met her, didn't you? your soulmate, i mean." he takes a sharp breath and hangs his head in shame.

"i did. i'm sorry — i thought i could hold onto you, but i just can't anymore. i'm in love with everything about her. just thinking about not having her in my life makes me sick." you feel like you just got punched in the stomach.

"what about me? what about us?" you gesture to nothing in particular, but it encapsulates everything from your ring, to your apartment, to the house you're planning to build together. to the life he promised you and you to him.

"i'm so sorry. i love you. you know i love you. i used to wish my soulmate was you, but i finally understand it can't be anybody else. when i look at you, all i can see is her." your body freezes as if you're a deer in headlights. you're so tense you feel like if you move you'll snap in two. eventually, you're able to squeeze out a simple nod.

"you know, even after everything you just said to me," you pause, "i still wish it was you. i just hoped you'd love me enough to feel the same."

"i know," he says, voice choking on tears. "i know."

his leaving comes naturally. no dramatics, no fighting. you come home from work the next day and it's like he's never even been there. the bed you shared feels empty. at night, you find yourself reaching for him and your arms fall flat against the cold sheets where he used to be.

notes pt. 2: sorry ;-; i know it's kind of sudden but i've been racking my brain trying to think of how else to put it and it's making my head hurt. if u don't like it i'm sorry 😭 editing this to say there will be another part :* maybe even 2 more parts actually

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msmoony7 · 1 year ago

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hey!! can you please do a fic with calum hood, maybe enemies to lovers and reader is the bands photographer or something like that (it’s okay if you don’t want to🫶🏼🫶🏼)

Love your work!!

note: hope u like it! I haven't written for 5sos yet AND i’ve never written enemies to lovers so i hope it’s good and enemy-y angsty enough. also pretend the first stop was LA and that the tour was six weeks idk how long it actually was this is just what i imagined for my little fanon fic LMAO. I kinda left this on a cliffhanger. Maybe part 2 soon??

calum hood x reader

word count: 1.84k

You wake up to the sun peeking through the cracks in your bedroom curtains. Although the weather on this day is perfect, your mood was anything but, and you wake up feeling sour. Today, you are presented with the difficult task of joining the band 5 Seconds of Summer as their tour photographer. You’ve been photographing artists for years now and it has truly become your passion. Whether it’s following an artist on your, or taking album art, you are living your dream with every picture you take.

That’s not where the difficulty lies. You know that you’re capable of doing your job and doing it well. The difficulty lies within the band. The name of that difficulty being the band’s bassist, Calum Hood. By now, you have a long history with the band. They first invited you to join them on the Take My Hand tour last year. You quickly became good friends with Luke, Ashton, and Michael. But for some reason, Calum just could not stand to be near you. Many days and nights were spent bickering between the two of you. Arguments would come up, about your creative direction and other bullshit he brought up, leaving you no choice to fight back, creating a lasting vendetta between the pair of you.

Of course, he made your job difficult as well. When photographing him onstage, he would mess with you and your work. Sometimes getting up in front of the camera and in your face, sometimes not letting you take any photos of him at all. And once offstage, he wouldn’t even look in your direction. Wouldn’t even address you. Despite this, your work speaks for itself and you received a message from Luke inviting you to join them again on this year's tour, The 5sos Show.

It’s been weeks since you got the tour invitation, and months since you’ve last seen the band. All the time in the world couldn’t prepare you for six weeks on the road with Calum Hood. What he had against you, you may never know. What you do know is that as long as he presents this dislike towards you, you will be doing the same right back at him.

Was putting yourself through all this stress worth it? You ponder for a moment when you wake up, but ultimately decide you made the right choice. You are set to meet up with the band and crew this evening before you set out on the road together, marking the start of the long six weeks ahead. You put on some music and start packing your suitcase.

After a while, you’re happy with everything in your suitcase and zip it up. Living out of a suitcase was difficult, but you’ve had prior experience so you know the do’s and don'ts of packing. You pack your backpack, carry on, and your camera supplies and before you know it, the day is behind you and it’s time to converge with the band. You call an uber to take you to the address Luke gave you and you’re on your way.

Traffic isn’t too bad, so you make it to the address quicker than you would have liked. The crew is already there, but the band is nowhere to be seen. You help yourself onto the bus and begin putting your things in your designated area. You feel the bus shift as someone steps on. Before you can turn around, you can already tell who is walking up behind you.

“Well, what do we have here?” you hear a sarcastic voice say behind you. You turn around and lock eyes with the bassist. He’s wearing grey sweatpants and a green 5sos sweatshirt. He looks adorable and cozy, and you hate him for being so gorgeous and so annoying all at the same time.

“Not even the first day of the tour and we’re already fighting, are we?” you spit back at him.

“Seems that way,” he replies before scurrying off to whatever hole he’s gonna bury himself in until he needs to be found again.

The rest of the boys slowly scatter onto the bus, and your meetings with them go better than yours with Calum. Everyone picks out their bunks and once everyone is settled onto the bus, the driver begins driving to the first stop on the road and you allow yourself to fall asleep for the night.

You wake up to the sound of fighting. It takes you a few seconds to shake off your grogginess before you hear two voices shouting back and forth at each other from the other end of the bus.

“You can’t keep acting like this!” you can hear Luke yell.

“Sure I can! I can't stand her being here and I’m not going to pretend I do.”

“Whatever, man. Do what you want, I give up. Just don’t come complaining when it comes to bite you in the ass.”

You can hear them shuffling around the bus as you stay hidden behind your curtain. Although your hatred for Calum was mutual, you couldn’t help but let a tear fall down your cheek as you lay in your bunk, thinking about everything you’ve had to endure from him in the past and will have to in the future on this tour. You are tired of feeling like this. Feeling beat down by him and his words, his actions. Now, you’re determined to get to the bottom of his hatred for you. You wipe away your tears, jump out of bed, and get ready for the day.

Tonight is the first night of the tour at The Kia Forum in Los Angeles. You’re excited. After all, you do love your job. You decide that the best way to get through the tour is to ignore Calum and his antics.

The day goes by quickly. The opening band is onstage and you’ve successfully avoided Calum the entire day. You grab all your camera equipment so you have it ready to go when the boys go onstage.

Calum sneaks up behind you, bass in hand. “Where’ve you been, y/n? Haven’t seen you all day, it’s almost like you’re ignoring me. You wouldn’t do that though, would you?”

“For the love of god, fuck off. Get away from me.” You huff at him while grabbing your camera and walking towards the side stage. The lights go off and he shoots you a wink before walking onstage. You push all this out of your head and get in front of the stage and start taking photos of the boys.

The night goes as well as you could have expected given your circumstances. You get some good photos of the boys. Calum was his usual self. This time around, he decided that whenever you got too close to him, he would turn around, making sure that you don’t get photos of his face or his instrument. Despite this, you do get some good photos of him. In all honesty, you think this is some of your best work. Calum looks really good. Even if you can’t see his face.

The boys all run offstage after the encore, high off of the energy from the gig. You shoot them a congratulations and you can see Calum heading in the opposite direction of you. Typical, you think.

The next stop of the tour wasn’t for another two days, so the boys are having a party to celebrate the tour kicking off. You follow Luke, Ashton, and Michael and see that the party is already in motion. Calum’s already at the bar grabbing a drink and your body moves before you can think and all of the sudden, you’re sitting next to him.

“What do you want,” he mutters sharply, not even looking up from his drink.

“How’d you know it was me?”

“Vodka cran,” he says to the bartender and nods at you. “I swear, whenever you get within ten feet of me I can feel my blood pressure rising,” he says in defeat as he gets up from his seat.

“Where’re you going? I thought we were finally getting along.”

“Back to the bus before I say something I’ll regret.”

And with that, he disappears out the door, leaving you confused as the bartender hands you your drink.

“I don’t know what his issue is,” you confess to Luke once you find him later that night. An hour or two has passed since you last saw Calum and you’re feeling tipsy from the alcohol.

“I wish I could tell you, y/n. I really wish I could. But we have no idea why he’s like this. We all love you and we love your work, I don’t know why he has it out for you.”

“Yeah, I don’t know. If I’m honest, I’m getting to my breaking point. I don’t think I can handle it anymore.”

“Want us to talk to him?” Luke says with concern written on his face. You can tell him and the other boys genuinely do care about you. It makes you feel good knowing that you have people to fall back on in this drama.

“Thanks, but I think I’m actually gonna go speak to him now. I’m just tired of it and I need answers now.”

“Well, good luck. Let us know how it goes.”

You say bye to everyone at the party and you leave to find Calum and get some long awaited answers for yourself. The walk to the bus is not far and as you’re approaching, you see Calum sitting on a bench outside, smoking a cigarette and looking up at the sky. He hears your footsteps on the ground and groans when he realizes it’s you.

“Following me now, are you?”

“Oh shut up, will you?” you say as you steal the cigarette from his hand, taking a drag before handing it back to him. “You’re an ass, you do know that, right?”

“What do you think, y/n.”

“I wanna know why.”

“Why what?”

“What do you think, Calum? You’ve never liked me. I’ve done nothing wrong. I literally can’t do this anymore, I don’t know what to do!”

He sits and thinks for a minute, leaving the two of you in silence. You stare at him as he stares at the ground ahead of him, waiting for a response. A minute goes by, then two. No response.

“Are you gonna answer me?” you yell. Still, no response. “Whatever, I’m done. Bye.” You say as you get up. You start walking in the direction of the tour bus when you feel him grab your arm and turn you around. Before you realize what’s going on, his lips crash into yours. At first, you don’t know what to do and you stand there frozen. He pulls away and just stares at you, and you stare right back.

“That an answer enough for you?” he says to you.

“Oh will you just shut up?” you say as you cusp his cheeks, pulling him towards you once more.

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swiftllama · 1 year ago

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Oct/Nov Compliments ☀️🔍

[Compliments Masterlist]

Hey guys! And we’re back for another two months of compliments! So let’s get into it :-

October 2023

Forbes Article

So to start off the month the boys done an interview with Jon Youshaei for Forbes and also an office tour. It would be later in the month we would get the full 2hr interview, but first we got the article that included excerpts from said interview, including these :-

Anthony being a softie for their friendship as always. Relatable.

This isn’t the first time they’ve mentioned about how the way they work and ‘fit’ together, they’ve never found in anyone else. I covered it in my first Compliments Post, both during Anthony’s interview with Ian and at Vidcon, they’ve each said similar things. And I love how they recognise that, and how truly special their bond is and something that can never be replaced or replicated.

The second quote of Anthony’s - GAWD my heart! I know he didn’t explicitly say it, but that quote basically boils down to ‘we’re two really close friends who love each other.’ 😭❤️

Anthony Reacts To “Where’s Anthony” Jokes

So this video, whilst funny, was pretty sad. I don’t know if it was just me, but I thought Ian seemed particularly quiet during it and like he was just trying to get through the reaction as quick as possible without dwelling on the clips long. I have said before, but I think the reasoning for his quietness may be down to the fact the ‘where’s Anthony?’ jokes held the most emotions for Ian than anyone else. Whilst he did join in on the jokes at times, there was much more behind it than when the others would make the jokes. In the reaction video they do make reference a couple times about how the jokes affected Ian, which I shall go into, some of it ties into being complimentary :-

[watching clip of two boys doing a tiktok trend and make reference to Anthony leaving]

Anthony: “I mean, that was a 10. Those guys- that joke was amazing. And you [Ian] took it like a champ, all things considered.”

Arasha: “Yeah, 10 for you too, Ian.”

I love them acknowledging how the jokes could of affected Ian but he always handled it well, regardless.

[watching clip of Shayne answering that Ian and Anthony are the best ship]

Anthony: “We are a good ship. I’ve read the fanfictions.”

Ian: “Oh yeah, the ship’s great. That ship’s sailing. It’s been sailing for a decade.”

Even they acknowledge it 😏😌

[watching clip of Ian pretending to be himself from the past talking to his future self and asking “how’s Anthony?”]

Anthony: “That one kind of made me a little sad.”

Ian: “Awww. Yeah.”

Anthony: “Yeah, cause I’m like thinking back to you actually in 2008 being all stoked about me being part of it.”

Ian: “About all our adventures and be like, “How’s Anthony?” and it’s like “awww”.”

Anthony: “Yeah, I give that one a 10. That was commitment.”

I’m fine. This is fine. Not crying at all…..

Anthony being sad imagining young Ian so excited about them working together and how it would hurt him knowing what happened between them 🥺😭

I like that Anthony gave him a 10 and acknowledged his commitment to the bit, just wish it didn’t have it be for something so sad 😩

[watching clip of Ian joking that Anthony was coming back and they would be getting rid of everyone at Smosh and Anthony laughs a lot at the clip]

Anthony: “That was good! That was a good one. That definitely caught Courtney and Damien off guard.” [laughs]

Arasha: “I liked it. Just convinced that they don’t have their jobs anymore. That is good.”

Anthony: “That was a good threat. Yeah. Got ‘em.” [highfives for jokingly threatening your employees lol]

[watching clip of Ian in a sketch saying “I should’ve left with Anthony.”]

Anthony: [laughs] “That was good! That’s good. That was a 10.”

Courtney: “That was improv.”

Anthony: “That was improvised?!”

Courtney: “It was.”

Ian: “Oh yeah.”

Anthony: [shocked/surprised face] “Really? Damn, no, that was really good.”

[watching clip of Shayne wearing an emo-style wig in a video and Ian saying “Woah, it’s like he never left.”]

Anthony: [laughing and banging hand on table] “That was just a 10. I like it because you didn’t even say the name. You just said ‘he’.”

Notice the pattern of Anthony giving Ian 10s 😌

[watching clip from Ian’s funeral roast where he tells Courtney after Anthony left she “stepped up and became the new person who shuts down every single idea [he] has”]

Anthony: “Damn, that was good. There was a lot there. I mean, obviously solid 10.”

Arasha: “There was some tension that was let out right then.”

Shayne: “Only excuse we have there is that we were drunk. That was our drunk live.”

Anthony: [to Ian] “Which is kind of funny though because when we’ve talked, you’ve talked about how I amp up your jokes and encourage you.”

Dads are fighting…😳🫢

But aside from the joking bit of tension of that moment I just want to acknowledge what Anthony said, about how he amps up and encourages Ian and that Ian does recognise that.

Got a little Ian compliment towards the end of the video too :-

Ian: [patting Anthony’s shoulder] “Anthony, we’re glad you’re here. And we know where you are.”

Anthony: “Awww… Thank you.

At the end of the video Shayne says how they’ll never make another ‘Where’s Anthony?’ joke again, and jokingly says unless he gets lost at some point. Anthony agrees, and then just to be a menace, jokes about them saying it again if he “leaves again permanently” 😩🤬

Ian: [acting panicked] “I can’t go through this again.”

There was then this little sweet moment of Anthony comforting Ian by rubbing his back 🥹

(credit to @ianthoni for the gif)

Anthony: “We don’t want to see that sadness under Ian’s eyes again.”

Ian: “No, never.”

Anthony: “Not anymore. We like happy Ian. He’s back.”

Anytime they bring up how happy Ian is now that Anthony’s back it makes me want to cry 🥹

I love you so much Grandpa #2

So Anthony went to Prague to get more tattoos, and what gift did he bring back for Ian? Covid. Anyways, they’d missed the previous members livestream since Anthony was away and so promised an extended one in this tweet :-

It’s more complimentary-by-extension but the little ‘I love you so much’ I feel could be very accurate to how Anthony’s reaction will have been irl of feeling guilty for giving only Ian covid. Especially given the reactions we have seen on video of them acting sus about it all, or Ian half-jokingly acting annoyed and staring at Anthony when it’s brought up and Anthony acting like he doesn’t know how they got it. A few examples :- (x)(x)(x)

Dixon Cider - Flashback w/ Smosh

In this Flashback they had to take a sip of Dixon Cider everytime they done something sexy in the music video.

Anthony: “Wait. Wait. I know I shouldn’t keep pausing, but what are you doing in the background of this shot?”

Ian: “I’m just vibing, dude. I’m just vibing. You know I should take a drink because I look pretty good there.”

Anthony: “You were sexing it up.”

👀 …okay, Anthony…

[Reacting to the breakdown part of the song]

Ian: “Sexy. I’m going to-” [takes a sip]

Anthony: “You know I’m gonna take a swig for that too.”

[Song lyrics: “I love Dixon Cider and I will ‘til the day that I die.”]

Anthony: “…Let’s do a 10 year check in. Do you still love Dixon Cider to this day? Do you think that you will until the day that you die?”

Ian: [stares at Anthony] “…Yeah.”

Anthony: “I’m gonna take a swig for that. That’s sexy.”

This video just became Anthony calling Ian sexy and I’m not mad about it.

2hr Interview

Finally the interview came 🙌

It covered a lot of the things we already knew. But of course through talking about these things we’re always bound to get compliments and that’s exactly what we got :-

[talking about how many projects they had whilst under Defy and how Anthony puts all his effort and passion into everything, whereas Ian’s focus was more on sketches and the creative side of things]

Ian: “For me, like, there was just certain things that I wasn’t that interested in so I didn’t really pour that much of my time into, but Anthony like doesn’t know how to not put all of his heart into something. So I think that’s what really just spread you thin.”

Anthony: “Yeah. I think it’s a good thing that you kept your energy in one place where it really showed. You having so much of your energy and placing it in the places that were more visible, the YouTube sketches, those videos are some of our most viewed videos on the channel. You know, 30, 40, 50, 60 million views on those videos. While I was putting all of my heart into all these projects that now I’m like ‘Do people even remember that comic book that we made?’ ‘Do people even remember the games that we made?’.”

One thing I really loved about this interview was the back and forth of compliments to one another. Really pointing out how they recognise each other’s strengths in their unique ways. As the quote above stated, Ian recognises how Anthony puts his all into everything and yes maybe it doesn’t always serve himself in the best way, but it shows just how much he cares about every aspect when it comes to Smosh. And that in no way discredits Ian’s care, it actually works so well when paired with Anthony’s dynamic that Ian focuses his efforts more on where he knows his strengths are and that is going to make the most impact. Which again, is one of the many reasons as to why they do mesh so well together.

Speaking of their dynamic, it’s something Anthony later brings up :-

Anthony: “…Something about just our two personalities just click really well and I think every single thing needed to happen exactly the way that it did for it to end up the way that it did, but the friendship specifically it needed to, we needed to completely separate ourselves from each other and almost find each other by what almost feels like by accident.”

Something about that line - “finding each other by accident” makes me all gooey inside 🥹 the fact they had to rediscover each other and have came out the other side with a newfound appreciation and so much love for each other is so heartwarming.

Jon: “I feel like you guys are both Pokémon who evolved.”

[I&A discussing who they would be]

Ian: “I guess I’m Charmander, maybe.”

Anthony: “Yeah? You Charizard now?

Ian: “I feel kind of Charizard now. I need to like work on my upper body strength a little bit more.”

Anthony: “But you do bring the fire.”

This was just a fun little one I felt I had the include! Especially with the reference to ‘fire’, which is something a lot of us have talked about in regards to Anthony calling Ian the sun, and also his incorporation of the word in his tattoos.

Anthony: [talking about how Ian had invited him to collab with Smosh but he never wanted to whilst they were under Defy and that he didn’t want to come back if he would have just been an employee]

Ian: “I mean at that point like I, especially cause I had reached out and been like ‘hey we should collab’, and Anthony was always very polite…”

Anthony: [laughs]

Ian: “…but would decline. So I think at that point I had totally resigned myself to thinking that like, you know Anthony doesn’t have any interest in being in Smosh again.”

Anthony: “Did you ever take any of that personally?

Ian: “Umm…”

Anthony: “I always tried to word it in a way where you knew it wasn’t about you.”

Ian: “Yeah, no, I don’t think I ever took it personally. I think I was always like frustrated…”

Anthony: [laughs]

Ian: “…because I was like, this is, ‘we could get views man!’. It was always like-“

Anthony: “Yeah, I was almost like I don’t want to give Defy views like, it sucks though that you, obviously Smosh, it was like I didn’t mind necessarily giving the views to Smosh, but like to Defy and it’s just like a shitty situation because you were obviously under the umbrella of Defy. But you know through that whole process, Ian and I connected a little bit, but I was really kind of just observing from the outside and it was wild to witness this, I still harboured a lot of resentment towards Smosh because of all the Defy stuff, and part of me was like ‘dang, this brand that Ian and I built is just totally on its own like- not on its own, but like it’s just doing stuff that I have no, I’m not a part of it at all, it’s just like this amorphous thing that’s just like evolving, but I will say from the outside I was, I was really impressed with how Ian helmed that ship and making sure that- I was really appreciative too, that Smosh didn’t just end up going to some company that just picked it apart and sold all of our assets, sold our logo to be used in some you know way, god knows what, and then you know the content just starts showing up in all these different ways and it’s all chopped up and bastardised.”

Ian: “Like we now get to do the chopping up and bastardisation.”

Anthony: “Yeah, that’s our- that’s my god damn right! Um… but you know also I got to see Ian step up as a leader in many ways and decide on the creative direction and at a certain point I feel like you know because Ian you were so like [shrugs] ‘well you know we’re pretty [mumbles]’, like I don’t know, I think that kind of sums up the way that you kind of uh [laughs] thought about the leadership [shrugs and mumbles again giving an impression of Ian’s nonchalantness towards the leadership role], and I think that was one of the things that silently frustrated me that I never openly spoke about. I was like, ‘I wish you had more of an opinion, more of a drive to creatively, you know to see this go in the direction that you see creatively’, so when I saw from the outside Ian taking this lead and having you know opinions that he put his foot down on and leading this entire cast and elevating everyone for their strengths and also showing up himself as a host, and a leader, and a boss… and a daddy.”

Ah shit, here we go again…

The daddy thing aside, what Anthony said about watching Ian step up into that leadership role from the outside is something he’s spoken about many times and will forever be something I love. Just that recognition of the role Ian had to play for Smosh to be exactly where that is now. I love that it’s something he continually brings up and as stated in the quote above, tells Ian how he appreciates the fact he stayed with Smosh and the hard work he put in so that they could once again own what is rightfully theirs.

Anthony: “…I think that was one thing that really made me interested in the prospect of coming back in and joining forces again. I think there was a while, especially because we didn’t communicate, where I felt like if I did come back in like ‘it would all be up to me again’ and I would have to figure everything out and you know Ian wouldn’t necessarily have the input because he’s so grateful for just being there in the first place that he wouldn’t necessarily want to put his foot down but I saw that would be something that you would take, you know help me take the lead on and it’s been really cool coming back together and feeling like we are two entities who are completely on the same page with everything but also we can separate from each other every once and a while and take our own lead in doing things working towards the same goal, but I didn’t feel like it was all on my shoulders anymore, Ian had, you were forced into that position, and you were forced to learn very quickly, but you did, and now we’re able to run this thing as a duo who also have independent ideas and you know creatively are able to put our foot down where it needs to.”

Jon: [asks why Anthony decided to come back despite having his own success independently]

Anthony: [talks about seeing old clips of their sketches online and how he had resigned himself to thinking their old content was only good because of the nostalgia making him imagine it fondly] “…but watching the clips I was like ‘wait, our writing…’ , there was obviously a lot of shitty stuff, but our writing at times was really, really solid and our, the chemistry we had together off-camera and on-camera was really strong, and we fit together in this way where we kind of balanced each other out and we were able to create stuff that was really, really solid that I hadn’t found in anyone else separately. I’d found also that Ian you told me you also realised the same thing, that the way that we work together is kind of like this magical combination that we haven’t really found anywhere else.”

They make me fucking SOB 😭 I cannot resist when they talk about their connection with one another and the chemistry they have together, and how it’s something they’ve never found in anyone else. It’s so special. THEY WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER!

Ian: [talking about how they want to make content they believe in and not just to make money and how their focus now is quality over quantity]

Anthony: [agrees and talks about how their approach is on being excited about the content itself and what viewers would most love to see rather than thinking of only pleasing the inventors like it was in the past with Defy]

Jon: “Yeah, it’s amazing how, I mean feelings matter when it comes to a creative business.”

Anthony: “Yeah, especially when you’re operating from a creative place, you know it’s not, we’re not just in the operations of the business, in fact I think it’s really good that we are, you know our faces are attached to it, our creative endeavours are fully public, our friendship is public. All these things, you know I feel like if all these things weren’t fully visible I could see some world where I’m like well, you know operating from a place of like ‘we’re just investors’, but I’m really glad that we, we’re in the same position now that we were in when we first started, which is us being two really, really close friends who love making each other laugh, love spending time together, love creating stuff together, love capturing the magic that we feel when we’re hanging out together and enjoying our time together and displaying that for other people to enjoy as well.”

Oh look, it’s me crying again 😩

I know I already included this quote earlier in this post, but of course had to touch on it again. It truly was just a roundabout way of Anthony saying ‘we’re two really, really close friends who love each other.’ But also talking about how they feel it’s ‘magic’ when they’re together and how they want to share that with others 🥹😭

Ian: [talks about how great the efficiency of the Smosh office space is]

Anthony: “It’s really cool, we almost have a blank slate to build out this place and make it work perfectly for exactly what we need and when we have multiple other channels; we have Smosh Pit, which is the channel where a group of people, you know we have a cast of really incredible people that helped in many ways keep the Smosh brand alive while I was gone, and you know Ian you helped elevate all of these really talented people and performers.”

A little 2 for 1 compliment from Anthony there, both for the cast and for Ian, of course. Again, something he’s mentioned before and think it’s really great how much he recognises everyone’s efforts in keeping Smosh going as well as Ian’s.

[I&A alking about their writing process]

Anthony: “I’ll be sitting there with the laptop writing out all our ideas. We’ll kind of be, lately because this is this very early stages, we’ll go back through some of our old videos, I’m like ‘here I really like that one element of this old sketch, this kind of idea’ and it’s usually like us going head to head on something, us working together to solve a problem, us going against some kind of like- us joining forces to go against some kind of evil thing, or us like trying to one up each other, and mess with each other, and ruin each other’s day, like we’ll figure out one kind of a through-line for the plot and then we just start throwing out a bunch of ideas. But I’ll start writing it out and then Ian will, he always gets, like actually the thing that always happens is Ian goes [imitates Ian’s laugh] ‘this is a really stupid idea’ and I’m like ‘what is it?’ [fakes typing] and I’m ready to type it out and he tells me the idea and it’s usually really, really funny, and if it’s not then I usually get an idea, I’m like ‘okay, I see where you’re going with that but I don’t think that works because of this, I think that we could go somewhere down here’ and I think that the interesting part of that process is it doesn’t ever seem like any of us is just like ‘no, that’s stupid’ or anything like that…”

Again, another thing Anthony continually brings up is the “stupid” (according to Ian) ideas that Ian throws out. Which are something he’s mentioned being his favourite, and how those are the ones he’s always most excited/intrigued for.

Anthony: [continues on about their writing process and how he’s in charge of the formatting and feels he’s good at picking out which ideas work and which don’t]

Ian: “Yeah, and I think some people would get- could get frustrated at something like that but I think Anthony and I have a specific shorthand, and I think we understand each other in a way that we never other found creative partners that quite clicked with us like we do in the time that we were apart. I feel like I didn’t quite, I felt like I was kind of like operating at like 70% and I never, like I still had great people that I was working with and really, really funny people that I was working with, but I never felt like I was contributing at a level that I should’ve been, that I can with Anthony.”

Once more them bringing up this connection with one another that they’ve never found with anyone else. I’ve said it so many times, but it’s so special. And Ian and Anthony realise how special it is.

Jon: [asks if the change in the algorithm is something they think about when writing jokes that could ruin monetisation for them and how they protect themselves against that]

Anthony: “Yeah, every once and a while we run into something where we’re like ‘that’s pushing it a little bit’ and what we do because we have the backup of having memberships, it gives us a little bit of leeway to be like ‘but that’s the funniest joke.’ But I think it’s actually really interesting and one thing that Ian and I do really well, is we work really well with limitations, like the more limited something gets, as long as I have freedom within that limitation, I think that our stuff gets really strong. In the early days we were literally making things out of cardboard, we created you know that Boxman character because we didn’t have any budget all we had was- we were looking around for props in my bedroom and we have this cardboard box there, like we work really well within like confined spaces and every once and a while it’s like ‘oh that joke it’s kind of pushing it in a way that might not really do well, it could get the video just like- not even just demonetised but blacklisted and like then the audience doesn’t even see it’ and we’re like ‘is there a funnier way to do this that still works?’ and 9 times out of 10 we think of a funnier idea that I’m like ‘if I were given these two options I would choose this one anyway’ so it doesn’t feel like a compromise, it feels like a bonus.”

You know I live for the individual compliments they give to one another, but every so often we get these compliments where they compliment themselves as well as the other and I love it because it goes back to their dynamic again and how well they work together to solve issues as a team.

[I&A watch old news clip of them from 2006 when they were creating the first Food Battle]

Anthony: “… but it was so cool, you know that was, that literally showed where the first videos that we ever made happened; It was in my bedroom at my mom’s house, and that is what our life was like, just sitting there on the computer getting excited about ideas and I think Ian was the one that suggested the ‘2006’, you know so I was there implementing these ideas and I would have a great time editing these things and learning how to edit in the process and Ian would, because he wasn’t editing, his brain was free to come up with all these insane ideas and he was like ‘oh do 2006 and have it crash together!’ and then I learned how to make the graphics come on-screen and like all these explosions and sound effects and I think that showed the dynamic between us, of me sitting there implementing these ideas and finding a way to one-up or guide some of the ideas, throw out the stuff that didn’t work super well, telling him like ‘I think we could do better with that one’ and Ian just sitting there and spitballing ideas and it’s just really cool to see that.”

And again, more talk of their dynamic. It’s definitely one of the things they recognise most about their connection with each other, and how it balances them and the way they work out so perfectly.

Jon: “The number 6 seems to be really important in your journey.”

[I&A laugh]

Jon: “I don’t know what is up with that, but 2005 you guys uploaded your first video. 2011, 6 years later, you sold. 6 years after that, 2017, you [Anthony] left. 6 years later, you guys bought it back. And I think it was 6 years and 6 days to the date, when I was looking at it…”

Anthony: “For the announcement? Yeah.”

Jon: “For the announcement.”

Anthony: “None of those things were planned to be 6 years. It just was.”

Ian: “Was it in June too?”

Anthony: “Yup.”

Ian: “Sixth month.”

Yes!! I was so excited when this was brought up! Gonna refer you guys back to this post I made about Angel Numbers. Know it’s not the type of thing everyone believes in, but I don’t think anyone can deny there is a pattern there with them and the number 6. And it’s something they notice themselves too.

Anthony: [talking about comments of people finding that same joyful absurdity in Smosh sketches again that they felt when they were kids] “I think a lot of us got kind of trapped in this cycle of looking at really dark content for a long time, and we started to feel like the world was a dark and scary place and just kind of feel shitty, and creating this stuff and consuming this type of content I hope it can help remind people that there is a little bit of light in the world, and capturing, like having that special dynamic with a friend, or with a group of friends is really special.”

“having that special dynamic with a friend” just wanted to point out that he looked over at Ian when he said this 🥹

And with one last reiteration of their special dynamic, that brought us to the end of the interview.

Submissive and Breedable

Yes. It is time to talk about ‘that’ moment. And don’t tell me there wasn’t something complimentary in it! That’s why I’m including it. Anyways, yes, Anthony called Ian “submissive and breedable” 🫠

You’ve all probably seen the clip by now but just to provide the context anyways. In the BTS they’re sitting on the couch together and Ian jokes about not being able to get up :-

Ian: “I’m almost 40, I can barely get up. Help… help… help…”

Anthony: “You’re on your own.” [laughs] “Why do you look so submissive and breedable right now?”

I hate him, I really do (affectionate) 🤦‍♀️

So yeah, that was a thing that happened… 👀

Stuck In A Toilet - Flashback w/ Smosh

After a week of Twitter shenanigans (x)(x)(x)(x)(x)(x) (x) and a roundabout way of promoting Food Battle, we got another eps of Flashback. This is when they were beginning to get sick but I don’t think realised they had covid yet. Anthony wasn’t too bad but Ian was sneezing and yawning throughout it. The one little complimentary moment I wanted to include was from one of those moments where Ian yawned and Anthony reached over to rub his shoulder which was very sweet ☺️ I actually posted the clip here for anyone interested.

Another small little moment that I took as complimentary happened towards the end of the video was them discussing their old hairstyles and Ian was asked whether he’d ever bring the bowl back and he said that he doesn’t think his hair has the same thickness so he doesn’t think he’d be able to achieve it. He then tries to style his hair back into a bowl :-

Anthony: “Oh shit, he’s doing it! He’s doing it!”

Ian: “My hair’s pretty long right now.”

Anthony: “Yeah, you can do it. I really think you’d be able to rock it just the same.”

Just love how Anthony’s always bigging him up to make him feel more confident LIKE YES! YOU TELL HIM ANTHONY!

Extended Livestream

So this livestream was to make up for the few that they’d missed. They had a lot to cover, including the “submissive and breedable” moment :-

[chat comment: ‘Is Ian looking submissive and breedable right now?’]

Anthony: [looks Ian up and down] “Yes.”

Ian: “You think so? Aw, shoot.”

Anthony: “Yes, he really do be looking submissive and breedable right now.”

Anthony needs to relax, I swear 😩 (we love it tho)

[reacting to Ian pulling out a hammer in the Cursed Magic 8 Ball sketch]

Anthony: “This was such a random moment. This was definitely an Ian joke, I love it though.”

He truly loves that boy’s humour so much, it’s one of his most favourite things about him ☺️

[talking about Anthony’s hideout in the sketch]

Anthony: “The secret hideout looked cozy as fuck.”

Ian: “Yeah, dude. It was hot as hell in there too, right?”

Anthony: “It was hot though, yeah, cause there were lights obviously. So these Christmas lights were not LED so they were producing a lot of heat and uh, my body, quite warm…”

Ian: “Cause you’re, submissive and breedable…”

Anthony: “Yes. Yes, Ian.”

THEYRE SO ANNOYING 😩 just had to include this moment since the shoe was on the other foot and it was Ian’s turn to call Anthony the now infamous quote.

[chat comment: Ian’s gone from looking like a depressed middle-aged dad to super happy and sparkling]

Anthony: “Awww, you’re sparkling.”

That’s right Anthony! And it’s all because of you 🥹 he lets him Bejeweled ✨

[signing out the livestream and Ian says he still has covid brain because he can’t get his word out]

Anthony: [talking about seeing everyone in the next livestream] “And until then, I will nurse Ian back to health.”

Ian: “Please. I am submissive and healable.”

🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Very cute how Anthony said he’d nurse him back to health though.

And on that note, that brought us to the end of October…

November 2023

Food Battle Trailer Watch Party + Tier List

So November rolled around and it was time for Food Battle promo. In this livestream they watched the 2023 trailer, plus ranked all the previous Food Battle’s. And in it we got this moment :-

[reacting to this still]

Ian: “Yo, that butt though.”

Anthony: “Yeah, that donk goes hard.”

Okay Anthony… 👀😏

Food Battle 2006 VS 2016 (Flashback w/ Smosh)

So this Flashback they had Courtney and Chanse on for, in which we got this moment :-

[watching Food Battle 2016]

Ian: “This hair though. Not a vibe.”

Chase: “The hair’s not a vibe.”

Courtney: “You figured it out.”

Ian: “That’s Ghostmates. That’s Ghostmates hair.”

Chanse: “You figured it out now.”

Anthony: “Oh, you figured it out, daddy.”

He does this to torture me I tell you.

Also I’m all for Courtney’s suggestion at the end of the video for them to stare into each other’s eyes for 4 minutes whilst calling each other ‘daddy’. Just tell us how many views to make it happen boys!

We Roast Anthony With Memes (Who Meme’d It)

I have been dying to talk about this! Because it was a crossover of all my favourite people Ian and Anthony + Taylor 🙌 I actually made a video out of these moments here. So they had Anthony on ‘Who Meme’d It’ with Courtney and Angela, along with a lot of the cast and crew watching from the sidelines.

One of the memes was this one comparing Ian and Anthony to Taylor and Travis, and Angela explains the meaning behind it to Anthony about the whole ‘Taylor put Travis on the map’ meme and how people only started caring about him when he started dating Taylor, and in this meme they were comparing Ian to Travis and Anthony to Taylor 😭

But Anthony was not having that!

Anthony: “That’s not fair to Ian. That’s messed up. Ian carried this company for 6 years!”

You tell ‘em Anthony! 😤

But yes I was living for the crossover plus Anthony defending Ian on top of that! It was like that moment was specifically curated for me 😌

Another moment of Anthony defending Ian in the video was when the meme about Ian’s very limited clothing options popped up 🤭

Again, Anthony was not having it :-

Anthony: [laughing] “That is fucked!”

Ian: [comes out to compare the current shirt he’s wearing to the one’s in the picture]

Anthony: “He has a fourth [shirt].”

Ian: “No, that’s a different shirt [on the board].”

Anthony: “Yeah, there’s no pocket on that one.”

Ian: “Yeah, see the no pocket?” Different shirt. Different shirt.”

Anthony: “Wow, Ian has five shirts.”

Love Anthony sticking up for him here! Just like shouting over everyone else to be in his corner, it’s very sweet ☺️

Food Battle 2023 Watch Party

Food Battle 2023 finally arrived and of course we got a livestream with the boys which included some complimentary moments :-

Ian was unhappy with how his hair looked in the scenes where they were on the roof in Food Battle because the wind was blowing it. He mentioned this in the stream and Anthony kept trying to reassure him that it was fine and saying his own hair was messed up 🥺

Ian: “I just hate how the direction of this wind was blowing was not ideal, I did not take that into consideration when we set up this shot.”

Anthony: “Yeah, Ian was not happy that his hair was all fucked up.”

Ian: “My hair is massively fucked for this entire [scene].”

Anthony: “But I was like it works for the final scene.”

Ian: “Yeah, it like makes me look insane, that’s fine.”

Anthony: “Well me too, when I stand up. I’ll show you in a bit. I’ll point it out.”

…

[watching the bit in question]

Anthony: “I look insane with my hair there.”

Ian: “Yeah, but, you think your hair looks insane. Look at this, look at this bullshit. What is that?”

Anthony: “It just looks like the wind’s blowing on you. Or it looks like you’re like an infant in a cartoon and that’s how they draw your hair.”

Ian: “What even is that? What would you even call this?”

Anthony: “The floof. The wispy floof.”

Just love Anthony trying to make him feel better 🥹

[cuts to the end screen and the close up shot of Ian and Anthony’s asses in the BTS]

Anthony: “Oh. Oh man. No, it’s so good.”

Anthony’s got a thing for Ian’s assets 😏

And in saying that it leads me on to the last compliment from this stream :-

We finally got Anthony’s thoughts of Ian in the maid outfit :-

Anthony: “Okay, alright, thoughts on the maid outfit.”

Ian: “What do you mean thoughts on the maid outfit?”

Anthony: “I thought it was a pretty good outfit.”

Ian: “Yeah, it’s hot. I think we both agree on that.”

Anthony: “It accentuates all the right places.”

Told you he loves Ian’s assets 🤭

Try Not To Laugh Challenge - Ian’s Birthday

So Anthony along with the cast, crew and some special guests done a TNTL for Ian’s birthday, it included multiple moments of them cheering, clapping and celebrating him but a lot of their bits were roasts to him, but of course his bestie came through as always :-

[Anthony comes out for his bit and starts playing music from the keyboard]

Anthony: “Hey, so you know when you found out that we were going to be buying Smosh back and you decided to get hot.”

Posted a clip of this moment here.

Have nothing more to add, what Anthony said speaks for itself.

Zach Sang Show Interview

So the boys went on the Zach Sang show and covered a lot of different topics and talked about their YouTube journey, and of course their reuniting was brought up :-

Dan: “How did you guys reconnect? Like who reached out to who? Or did you guys sit down one day together?”

Ian: “A friend of mine, I was talking to her about Anthony and she was like ‘you should reach out to him, like what are you doing’.”

Anthony: “What were you saying to her about me? Like ‘oh this old friend of mine’.”

Ian: “Well cause I was like telling her about, I was telling her about Smosh and you know talking about you and yeah I think she could kind of like saw, you know there’s still like, I still, you know I spoke fondly of you and everything, so she was like ‘you should get back together with him’.”

I know we already knew this story, but now with the inclusion of the fact that Ian was speaking fondly about Anthony is so sweet to hear 🥹

Zach: “What have you learned about each other from this second Smosh chapter? Or whatever you would describe it, this… rekindling? Or resurrection?”

Anthony: “One thing that stands out to me is how much Ian was forced to step up into the leader position, cause you know for so many years as we were working together, you know Ian was really like ‘go with the flow’, and that’s where we actually excelled was that dynamic between us, was I would take a little bit more of the leadership role, little bit more like rigid, like ‘get this thing done. figure out this thing. I have this to-do list and these goals’ and I was like kinda doing that kind of thing, all the programming and stuff. While Ian was a lot more focused on just being creative and shooting out ideas, and that’s where I think the dynamic between us really flourished, but now, you know I’ve kinda been, because I’ve been off on my own I’ve been forced to kind of hone in on that creative, go with the flow side, while Ian’s been forced to hone in on that leadership mentality, and I think it’s really cool to see that side of both of us flourish.”

Know we’ve also heard this multiple times before, but I just love when Anthony admires how much Ian stepped up into that leadership role after he left, even though it wasn’t what Ian necessarily wanted. But that recognition now from Anthony is such growth, and I love how it’s something he continually points out and praises him for.

Ian: [talks about how he felt he was thrown into the deep end to be a leader when Anthony left, and even though it was hard he’s glad he stuck with Smosh as he still saw the potential it had]

Anthony: “Yeah, and I really respect Ian pulling Smosh through just so many years of all that difficulty, kind of like tredging through this like swamp with this company and turning it, and keeping it alive, keeping it thriving, creating new formats and shows and highlighting the cast and you know growing it into what it became when I decided that you know it was time, we could do this again, and I think in the final years of me being at Smosh I started to resent everything. I started to resent you know the parent company and kind of what they turned Smosh into, and how Ian and I lost our friendship in some ways because of it, but also because of ourselves, and I think because I in part of that I was resenting Ian in part of that, I think I forgot to really respect and honour the work that Ian had put into it, and I think part of me because I felt like so much of it was out of my control and you know I felt like ‘if it was all in my control this would have been fine’ you know what kind of a story that I built in my head, so I think I started to resent Ian and the way that the company had went so it was really cool to be watching from a distance and as I started to reconnect with Ian and everything to kind of start to understand that mindset that he had, why he stuck around, what he has built it into, and you know growing into this leadership position and taking all these roles on that he didn’t want and you know all these positions that I felt like I was thrown into Ian was now being thrown into…”

Again, that recognition for all Ian’s hard work and about how difficult it must’ve been for him to be thrown into that role when he left.

Anthony: [talks about how he feels his upbringing affected him resenting and being frustrated with that leadership role when he was at Smosh because of the responsibilities he had to take on for his family due to his mom’s agoraphobia] “So I felt like I dealt with Smosh like that to a certain degree and I think that part of me was trying to have Ian be like co-running it entirely, like 50/50 and I got in my head like ‘it needs to be 50/50’ because I think that I wanted that kind of in my childhood home, so because Ian was so much more focused on being more creative and in many ways keeping Smosh fun, which I feel is at the heart of Smosh, I think a part of me resented Ian for not taking on that leadership role with me as much, and you know I think one element of us reconnecting is Ian really has taken on that leadership role and I don’t feel it’s on my shoulders anymore to that same degree and Smosh, you know Ian kept Smosh alive and thriving for 6 years while I was gone, I don’t feel now like it’s hanging on by a thread that I’m holding on to, it feels like it can live and thrive on it’s own and Ian’s there to back me up whenever I need it.

I’ll forever love this dynamic between them now, again it’s something we’ve heard from them before, how they share that leadership now. I’m so glad they have that in each other, because as they’ve spoken about, it’s a lonely job being the boss, so having a partner in that, someone who is your equal to share that load with makes all the difference, which is something we’ve seen manifest over and over again, especially in regards to Ian, and it’s something he’s spoken about himself, just how much happier he is that he knows he has Anthony there backing him up. I just think it’s so special that they have that in each other.

Daddy 2.0

So everyone has been simping for Ian in his priest costume for Anthony’s Funeral Roast, and rightfully so :-

Andrew Scott who?

And of course Mr No.1 Ian simp himself, Mr Anthony Padilla is at the forefront :-

Numerous other Smosh members commented on the post, but Chanse and Amanda’s were the thirstiest two :-

And who was out here lurking in Ian’s comments liking each and every one including those^^ two…

Real subtle as always, Anthony 🤭

Ian’s Birthday

Just wanted to include a little bit about Ian’s birthday since I did for Anthony’s, and similar to his, it was more complimentary-by-extension, but still as utterly cute ☺️

Of course as his No.1 fan this day must be just as equally exciting for Anthony - a full day to celebrate Ian! (Not that he doesn’t do that every day tho)

We got this adorable birthday post from Ian of Anthony giving him his gift :-

Of course inspired by the recurring joke created by Shayne in this video that Ian is Chumbawamba’s No.1 fan 😄

And Anthony’s comment

‘Birthday boy’ gets me 🥹

Another sweet little moment from the day was this video that I posted here of the cast and crew bringing Ian a cake and singing ‘Happy Birthday’ to him, I put this in my tags at the time, but notice how Anthony’s right in there front and centre to celebrate him 😭 It’s also the first birthday Anthony has properly been able to celebrate with him in so long given they had only just re-connected before Ian’s birthday last year so things were still new, so I’m sure this time around it was so special for them to be able to celebrate both their birthdays together for the first time in so many years 🥰

And with that, that brings us to an end on October and November. One more month left of this year and I can’t wait to see what that’ll bring us. I’ll see you guys next time 💖

#sorry this has taken me so long to get out for you guys!#a long post but hope you enjoyed!#ianthony compliments #ianthony #☀️🔍#ian hecox #anthony padilla #smosh #my posts

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vengeancevixen · 1 year ago

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Panic Fact: Let’s talk about some misinformation regarding Dallon. It seems people are confused about his contributions. Dallon joined Panic as a touring bass player after Ryan and Jon left in 2009. Panic was opening for Blink 182 and Dallon & lan played those shows with Panic. It was NOT finishing the Pretty Odd tour. That tour had ended before Ryan and Jon left.

Brendon & Spencer were working on Vices & Virtues. Dallon did not become a member of Panic until after V&V was done. He did do the album cover art, however.

Brendon & Dallon then cowrote on TWTLTRTD. This would be the only album Dallon contributed on. I see people saying Dallon wrote most of this album and that is also not true. Let's just celebrate that they made a great album together and stop with trying to discredit the other.

Also, this rumor that Dallon was so poorly paid by Panic he had to clean carpets, let’s dig into it. First, Dallon was about ready to give up on his musical career altogether until the call from Panic came in. He was already working as a carpet cleaner. When he joined Panic as a touring player, it was for a limited number of shows opening for Blink. I don’t imagine any touring musician playing that few shows as an opening band at that time wouldn’t have other gigs lined up or second jobs. It’s a tough business. Anyway, here is Dallon talking about it:

Also, this notion that everyone hates working with Brendon is complete nonsense made up by fans. He has worked with pretty much the same people throughout his career and has remained good friends with them until today.

As far as the original lineup, he is best friends with Spencer still today. He and Ryan last spoke (that we know of-and if they’ve spoken since, I doubt they’d want this crazy fan base to even know about it) in 2017. They joked with each other on Twitter well after the split. The one thing that hampered their friendship was the Panic catfisher situation. They aren’t close anymore but they would definitely talk if they ran into each other, as they did in 2017. That time in Panic I am sure feels like two lifetimes ago to both of them and they have all moved on… a long time ago. I think they are proud of what they all accomplished together. Jon has always remained positive about Brendon and Panic.

The current band that’s been with Brendon, Dan, Nicole & Mike absolutely rave about their time in Panic. They truly are a family and had a blast together!! They have all spoken very highly of their time in Panic. From producers to the crew, they all say how great Brendon was to work with.

I’m sure I will add more to this but I can’t stand the misinformation! If you love a band, an artist, go support them. If you have to drag one to boost the other, there’s something very messed up about that.

# Add tags to help people find your posts

#brendon urie #panic! at the disco #patd #brendonurie #panic at the disco #p!atd #stop spreading misinformation #dallon weekes #let people enjoy things #pre split panic #afycso #panicatthedisco #ryan ross #pre split patd #ryden #stop spreading lies

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gerec · 2 years ago

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AU-gust 2023

16. Road Trip

Pairing(s): Cherik Warnings: N/A

Charles received the letter upon his arrival in Calais, which led him to believe that it had been sent before he even left England to begin his travels. Grinning, he thanked the porter for bringing his luggage, and agreed to meet his tutor Mr. Summers for a late dinner, before retiring to his room and unsealing the envelope.

Dearest Charles,

Yes, I did send this letter ahead of your arrival, as I knew you would take your time in Dover before making it across the Channel! Just know that you are missed already, as Tony’s attention span is dismal on a good day, and he is entirely insufferable without your slightly less irritating presence around to keep him in line.

(And no, he has still not forgiven his father for forbidding him to join you on the Grand Tour. I imagine dinners at the Stark household will be very chilly for the foreseeable future.)

In any case, I have made arrangements for a Mr. Erik Lehnsherr to meet you in Calais and interview as your translator and guide. The man is a bit taciturn but well-educated and well-travelled, and most importantly speaks French, German, Italian and Dutch. He comes highly recommended by Christian, who met him and took him on as a guide during his own tour three years ago.

But Emma, you say, will this man be good company on the road? And will he be easy on the eyes? While I cannot attest to the former, Christian assures me that he is quite handsome indeed, enough to meet even your high expectations. Most importantly, he shares the same worldly outlook on relationships as you do – and my dear brother of course – so I am certain you two will get along splendidly.

Do remember to write, as I suffer here in London without your charming presence at all the best parties. I will keep an eye on Raven and Dr. McCoy, and send details of their burgeoning relationship.

Yours,

Emma

----

Mr. Lehnsherr sent word the next day, and Charles was quick to agree to a meeting at the hotel. He invited Mr. Lehnsherr to join him for dinner, but the man declined, citing a previous engagement that sounded more like a contrived excuse. And while everything Emma said in her letter was true – he had travelled all over Europe, and was fluent in all the languages of the countries Charles planned to visit – he was also prickly and almost condescending, as though he didn’t quite approve of the frivolous nature of Charles’ travels. His answers, when asked after his family and where he called home, were distressingly vague and curt, and, as their conversation drew to a close, Charles could not imagine spending months on the road with this man, who proved even more infuriating than his two best friends back home.

Finally, after he’d had enough of Mr. Lehnsherr drinking his brandy and insulting England’s weather, he blurted, “Why do you even want this position? You clearly do not approve of my reasons for coming to the Continent, or even to care for my very person. This trip is a chance for me to open my eyes to the wider world, Mr. Lehnsherr, and I will not waste it at the side of someone who will hinder instead of help me.”

Mr. Lehnsherr smiled, perhaps the first genuine one of the evening and replied, “Would you welcome the truth, I wonder? Well, here it is Mr. Xavier. My work as an artist requires that I travel, and a position like this helps me with my expenses. And while I do not think you will learn anything truly meaningful and worthwhile on a trek of luxurious decadence through Europe, I am a quite capable guide, and will do an exceptional job in showing you exactly what you ask of me. Whether you choose anything beyond the attending fancy parties is entirely up to you, as is the way you choose to flaunt your privileged wealth.”

Charles was stunned, entirely unused to such harsh judgement from someone he’d met mere hours before. He bristled as Lehnsherr watched him with those steely blue eyes, sharp and accessing as though he were measuring Charles’ character and finding him lacking. Part of him wanted to send Lehnsherr away with a sound rebuke, and yet another, bigger part wanted desperately to prove him wrong; to show him that Charles was not merely a spoiled rich boy, and that he intended to use his position as heir to the Dukedom of Norfolk to better the lives of those in his care.

“I assure you that I did not take this journey on for the parties,” he countered, with just enough chill in his voice to make his affronted feelings known. “I welcome a thorough education, not just of the rich but of the poorest in the land, though, would you call it decadence if I wanted also to admire great art and learn about music and history to enrich my soul? Before I must be married off and swallowed whole by a life of duty and tradition?”

If anything, Lehnsherr’s smile only grew wider, and for the first time, he met Charles’ gaze with something like approval. “I would be happy to oblige you, Mr. Xavier, in whatever manner of decadence you wish to indulge.”

His cheeks flushed with heat at Lehnsherr words, and he remembered what Emma had intimated in her letter; that the man might share his proclivities for the same sex. He held his breath when Lehnsherr closed the distance and lightly brushed Charles’ cheek with his fingers, only exhaling when he grinned and then stepped away again.

“Well, Mr. Xavier,” Mr. Lehnsherr said, licking his lips as he took a slow sip from his glass of brandy, “do I have the job?”

Charles blinked, flushing again when he realized he’d been staring at Lehnsherr. He poured himself a refill, before turning to meet the man’s steady gaze.

“Yes. Mr. Lehnsherr. Be ready to leave the day after tomorrow.”

#cherik #gerec writes #au-gust 2023 #road trip #the grand tour #18th century #day 16

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nestaway1 · 1 year ago

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#nestaway #nestaway ratings #nestawayreview #nestawaygood #nestaway platform #nestaway reliable #nestaway reviews #nestaway good #nestawaypune #nestaway review

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coolyturtles · 11 months ago

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Expert-Guided Tours: Swim with Turtles and Make the Most of Your Gold Coast Experience

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#Swim with Turtles

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itsallyscorner · 4 years ago

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Can you write a little mix member x avengers cast?? Maybe?

Hello love! Thank you for the request, I apologize for taking so long to work on it! I’ve written this as a headcanon, since I haven’t done any of those in a while. I hope you like it❤️

💌.

The Marvel Cast Finds Out You’re In Little Mix

Why is this lowkey a crack fic/headcanon😭💀

Alrighty so, I feel like they probably wouldn’t know you’re part of a band or who Little Mix is.

Since SADLY, the girls aren’t as big in the States as we’d like them to be:(

The people who definitely might know you are ✨The Brits✨ and Scarlett because she has a young daughter who probably listened to Wings or something—kids find everything on the internet these days.

Working with Marvel was your first acting gig; so none of them knew anything about you or if you’ve been in other films, etc.

Except for Tom Holland, who was lowkey fangirling at the fact he gets to work with one of the Little Mix members.

Side note: he’ll be deeply offended when he figures out the others don’t know about Little Mix or that you can sing.

The rest of the cast (RDJ, Chris Evans, Anthony Mackie, Seb, Lizzie, etc.) had a hunch that you were some kind of writer.

You were always humming to yourself and writing in your notebook or typing down notes in your phone when something came to mind.

Though they didn’t pry at your business because—well, it wasn’t their business.

They could find out about your other job through many ways. Maybe you guys are doing promo and some interviewers mention the band and things about a new album, to which most of them were confused about.

“So (Y/n), I know this is your first time acting. How different was it from performing on stage and acting on camera?”

Everyone’s attention would be on you (this is a panel btw) Mackie’s looking at the back of your head in confusion, Robert fully turns in his seat to look at you, Lizzie is also curious, Evans is looking between you and the reporter—everyone is just confused.

“Performing on stage? Did you do Broadway (y/n/n)?” Evans asked. Tom (Holland) scoffed shaking his head, disgusted to be part of this group of uncultured swines.

You chuckled and shook your head, “No, I’m a singer. I’m part of a girlband.”

The whole cast gasped in shock. Mackie let out a loud “WHAT?!”. Robert leaned even closer to you trying to see if you were lying. Others whispered amongst themselves asking each other if they knew.

Tom (Holland) just sat back watching everyone’s reactions along with you. Amused at the amount of questions that were suddenly being thrown your way.

He’d also be quick to add, “NOT just ANY girlband, but the biggest girlband on the planet.”

For clarification, Tom’s a very proud Mixer.

Scarlett finally recognized you, knowing that she’s seen you somewhere before, but could never put her finger onto it. “Wait you’re from Little Mix!”

“THANK YOU! FINALLY SOMEONE WITH SOME TASTE!” Tom yelled, dramatically turning to Scarlett.

After the initial shock, everyone was very curious. They wanted to hear your music, wanted to know the other members, when your next tour was—they were very ecstatic.

When you guys finally reached London for the press tour, there was a lot of hype for Little Mix because you guys were going to finally reunite after months of being apart.

The girls were allowed to visit set, but since you guys were working on your new album, they were stuck in London. You were relocated to Atlanta, filming an Avengers movie and working on the album via FaceTime/Zoom.

You and the girls reunite the same night you land in London! As tired as you were, the five of you hung out in your hotel room.

You were all excited for the days to come. Not only were you doing promo for the movie but you and the girls were going to be performing again on night time talk shows and were having a Live Lounge session with BBC Radio 1.

The panel of the cast discovering you were part of a band went viral. Many of the fans couldn’t believe they didn’t know about your other job.

There were even edits going around social media of the cast looking clueless and or reacting to your ‘secret’.

Then there were ones like “Tom Holland being a Mixer for 10 minutes and 57 seconds straight”.

Your favorite one was where they zoomed in on everyone’s confused expression while that one Nicki Minaj song played in the background.

It was mentioned in almost every interview after it went viral.

“So none of you had a clue that (y/n) was also a singer? Like at all?”

“I didn’t even know homegirl could sing, matter of fact I never imagined her to be in a girlband.” — Anthony Mackie

“I had a hunch that she was a musician or artist, but no one ever listens to me.” — Chris Evans

“(Y/n)’s in a girlband? Since when?” — Paul Rudd

“After we found out, I listened to all six of their albums on the flight here.” — Elizabeth Olsen

“Of course I knew, my music taste is immaculate compared to the others.” — Tom Holland

“Shut the fuck up, Tom.” — Anthony Mackie

“I really enjoy Black Magic, it reminds me of Wanda.” — Paul Bettany

The cast was so eager to hear you sing and watch you perform with the girls.

They finally got to do that when you invited them to the Live Lounge session. They also got to meet the girls.

You were very happy at that moment; seeing the two groups of people you love meeting each other and getting along meant a lot to you. It gave you a lil warm tingle in your heart.

Since there were no fans in the studio, it was only you and the girls, the band, and a bunch of the Avengers.

While the cameras rolled and you guys were performing, they were crowded together behind the scenes. Some of them were sitting on the carpeted floors or standing against the walls.

They were absolutely stunned when they heard you sing. You had a powerful voice that ranged from high to low, something they never expected of you.

When they heard you and the girls sing or harmonize with each other, it was like they were all in heaven.

“They sound like angels.”

“My ears are tingling, but like in a good way.”

“Seriously, how did we not know she can sing like this?”

“Hear me out—this is a perfect reason as to why we should have an Avengers musical.”

“Chris if we hear you bring up a damn musical one more time I swear.”

“Their voices go so well together, how do they even do that?”

Scarlett would secretly film videos to show her daughter. I have a feeling that Evans, Tom, RDJ, Sebby, and Mark would record some parts as well and would post it onto their Insta stories.

When fans found out they were at the Live Lounge they freaked out.

Ever since they found out you were in a band, they’ve been the biggest fans and supporters of the group.

They’re always promoting your albums on their social media accounts without you even asking.

Privately and publicly praising you guys for performances or achievements.

Your two main groups clashed and now everyone was friends. It was definitely the most weirdest collision— Little Mix and the cast of the Avengers. But it worked out perfectly.

Everyone got along with each other and the girls would always visit you on set.

They’re always playing the band’s song in the background on set.

Most of them won’t admit, but they definitely memorized the lyrics to almost every song.

*cough cough* Mackie and Hemsworth

I feel like Samuel L. Jackson would join in on the action too, one way or another. Somehow he got looped in.

ANOTHER THING OMG, they would definitely stand up for you and the girls whenever Piers Morgan or some asshole hates on you guys or pulls a jab on you all.

Best beileve Evans will be calling him out publicly on Twitter.

“Why are you so worried about a bunch of talented women who are doing their job and bringing happiness to others? They’ve done nothing to you, you’re always the one making jabs at them. Leave them alone you fucking British meatball.”

I feel like Robert helped you and the girls find a better management company after learning about the unfair treatment you all faced under Simon’s care.

In conclusion: The Marvel cast would be ecstatic to learn about you being a singer and they’d become your biggest fans. They truly adore you and the girls for your amazing talent :’)

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tillidontneedfantasy · 4 years ago

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A Track-by-Track Breakdown of Taylor Swift’s 9th Studio Album: ‘evermore’

“My collaborators and I are proud to announce that my 9th studio album and folklore’s sister record is here. It’s called evermore,” is how Taylor Swift introduces us to this album in its foreword. One might assume a “sister record” would entail b-sides, or tracks that didn’t quite make the cut for folklore, despite Taylor’s explanation that “we just couldn’t stop writing songs.” evermore’s release came at a strange time, upon the heels of the Folklore: Long Pond Studio Sessions film on Disney+, as well as 5 Grammy nominations for folklore. The world still captivated by folklore, it’s understandable why one might not consume evermore as critically. Even as a die-hard fan, I felt some whiplash by this announcement; I am still processing folklore! Hell, I’m still processing reputation!

If this was the Taylor from two years ago, this may have been a big enough fear of hers to hold off on releasing evermore. But as she explained upon folklore’s surprise release, life is too unpredictable now, and there are zero givens or guarantees. So she followed the same path this time (although making sure it fell in line with her birthday weekend). But it’s not just the strategic timing of the release that she’s thrown out the window for now, but also her mindset whilst making records. As she explains in the evermore album foreword,

“I’ve never done this before. In the past I’ve always treated albums as one-off eras and moved onto planning the next one as soon as an album was released. There was something different with folklore. In making it, I felt less like I was departing and more like I was returning. I loved the escapism I found in these imaginary/not imaginary tales. I loved the ways you welcomed the dreamscapes and tragedies and epic tales of love lost and found. So I just kept writing them.”

This is a revelation for Swift, to let the music lead her into artistic freedom, which is what makes evermore such a triumphant return. Truly folklore’s sister record, Taylor wrote evermore with the same creative team: Aaron Dessner of The National (Swift’s favorite band), long-time pal and collaborator Jack Antonoff, Justin Vernon of Bon Iver, and William Bowery aka Swift’s boyfriend, Joe Alwyn (as officially revealed in the Long Pond Studio Sessions). Additionally, former 1989 tour openers and close friends of Taylor, the HAIM sisters, join the crew, along with Marcus Mumford for some dreamy backup vocals.

The production is just as wistful and mesmerizing as it was on folklore, yet the storytelling on evermore is kicked up a notch, expanding on the topics and worldbuilding established in its sister record, with even sharper lyrics and an effective and elaborate use of alliteration. The best thing about Taylor is that no matter what she does, her masterful lyricism is always at the heart of her art, and somehow, she keeps getting better. Once again, I wanted to explore the rich stories she’s crafted in this woodsy universe. This is how I’ve interpreted the album, but I hope you find your own meaning in the songs as well.

1. willow It is fitting that the opening track to folklore’s sister album, where we wade further into the forest that is Taylor Swift’s imagination and storytelling, would center on the type of tree that is a symbol of hope, belonging, safety, stability, and healing. “willow,” one of the few more obviously autobiographical tracks on the album, is a hymn of gratitude for her man (as she wants you to know, yes, thirteen times), Joe Alwyn, and how the invisible string tethering them together pulled her to him in a time when everyone else was counting her out. Though not as present on many of the other songs later to come on this record, you can feel the lightness in her heart on this song as she embraces the way in which the willow has bent, wrecking her plans, throwing her into the water and leaving her happily lost and afloat in his current. The downward key modulation throughout the last two repetitions of the chorus is beautiful and very fitting for Swift vocally, but also sounds like the feeling of finding your comfort and settling into it, basking it in while you wait for the next place the wind pulls you. Best lyric: “Now this is an open/shut case / I guess I should’ve known from the look on your face / Every bait and switch was a work of art.”

2. champagne problems On the second track of the album, Taylor dives back into the fictional worldbuilding she began to explore on folklore. While on folklore high school relationships and dramatics took center-stage, evermore graduates from adolescence to young adulthood, not that it is any easier emotionally on the listener’s heart. “champagne problems” chronicles a rejected marriage proposal between two college sweethearts at their old dorm building. Taylor sings as the narrator, a reflective, self-deprecating young woman who jokes about belonging in a madhouse and dismisses all her turmoil as champagne problems. The term ‘champagne problems’ itself could have various meanings here: their trivial concerns, the fact that their “sister splashed out on the bottle” of champagne that they will not be using to celebrate as they had hoped, or perhaps it could even hint that excessive drinking is a piece of all the ways the narrator is “fucked in the head,” as they said. Although the person she is singing to is the one who got hurt in the story, the hurt in the narrator’s heart is just as palpable and relatable, because you only have yourself to blame when you self-destruct. Best lyric: “’She would’ve made such a lovely bride, / what a shame she’s fucked in the head,’ they said / but you’ll find the real thing instead / she’ll patch up your tapestry that I shred.”

3. gold rush On her YouTube live chat prior to the album’s release, Taylor explained that this song “takes place inside a single daydream where you get lost in thought for a minute and then snap out of it.” The daydream consists of a love story so pure that the town had never seen such a thing; it could only happen in a fantasy for the narrator. How could she possibly have the gall to call them out on their contrarian shit, or end up with her Eagles t-shirt hanging from their door, when they are so coveted by all, and when she cannot withstand the thought of even competing? She sings, “My mind turns your life into folklore / I can’t dare to dream about you anymore,” a sweet little connecting piece to this album’s older sister, effectively convincing herself out of the idea of jumping into the chaos of the gold rush because even inside her own imagination it’s too dangerous. Best lyric: “I don’t like that falling feels like flying ‘till the bone crush.”

4. ‘tis the damn season According to Aaron Dessner, Taylor had written the lyrics for “’tis the damn season” in the middle of the night amidst their Folklore: The Long Pond Studio Sessions recording after a long night of chatting and drinking with their co-conspirator, Jack Antonoff. The lyrics perfectly encapsulate the guttural ache the track evokes. It is a tale of two people who always find their way back to one another in their hometown, which acts as the ever-returning fork in the road. The path taken, back to L.A. in pursuit of her dreams, is the one she chose and continues to choose, but whenever she returns home, she takes a ride down the road not taken, just to get a taste of what could have been, even if just for the weekend. What starts off as an icy homecoming always transforms into the warmest intimacy. The success of this track is aligned with the success of Taylor’s entire career; even with such specific details, it feels so deeply personal to the listener. You know the street you’d drive along late at night laughing, the spot you’d park the car, the person who stars in every what-if. You will never really know if the road not taken is as good as it seems, but that might be ok; sometimes, the fantasy is better than the reality, anyway. Best lyric: “It’s the kind of cold / fogs up windshield glass, but I felt it when I passed you / There’s an ache in you / put there by the ache in me.”

5. tolerate it Inspired by the novel Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier, “tolerate it” is an agonizing track from the perspective of a devoted wife who polishes plates and paints portraits and waits by the door for her husband with a battle hero’s welcome, who at best tolerates all her adoration. There are few things as painful as idolization being met with indifference, when you have all this love to give to someone who just leaves it there untouched. “tolerate it” captures that desperation for the approval you know will never arrive, but you sit and watch, waiting for it just in case you’re wrong, but you know you’re not. Best lyric: “I made you my temple, my mural, my sky / now I’m begging for footnotes in the story of your life / drawing hearts in the byline”

6. no body, no crime feat. HAIM “no body, no crime,” the one evermore song solo-written by Taylor, has the clearest plot from beginning to end. In the same vein as the female powerhouse country classic “Goodbye Earl” by The Chicks, Taylor is out for blood to avenge her friend, Este (named for one of the HAIM sisters). The story goes as such: Este’s husband kills her for calling him out on his infidelity, and then Taylor kills the husband and frames his mistress. The HAIM girls, who are long-time friends of Taylor’s and former touring mates, lend their vocals to reinforce the accusation on the husband and to provide Taylor’s alibi. “no body, no crime” is so far the closest we’ve gotten to a return to “country Taylor,” proving that she is still the master of a killer country tune (yes, pun intended, it had to be done I’m sorry). Best lyric: “Good thing Este’s sister’s gonna swear she was with me / (she was with me, dude) / Good thing his mistress took out a big life insurance policy”

7. happiness Written a week before the album’s release, “happiness” is one of Swift’s strongest and most reflective breakup songs. Although she writes it as though it is recent, there’s a lot of power in knowing that she’s been happily in love for four years, and that she is even better now at doing the thing that has always been best at. She is finally “above the trees,” as she sings, and is able to see it all for what it is, but her character is still in the heat of it all, trying to navigate the stages of grief when a relationship ends. We see the narrator grapple with many of those stages throughout the song. Most striking is the anger displayed in the second verse when she sings: “I hope she’ll be a beautiful fool who takes my spot next to you / No, I didn’t mean that, / sorry, I can’t see facts through all of my fury.” That section is jarring and feels like one of the most honest moments in a Taylor song, the insanely difficult emotional balancing act when we are grieving a relationship. The devastation of loss can distort our perception, and a part of that is the difficulty of understanding how multiple seemingly opposing things can co-exist in our hearts, such as happiness because of someone and happiness after them. But when you leave it all behind and finally find your place above the trees, you can find happiness after someone and also look back and appreciate the happiness they once provided. Both of these things can be true. Best lyric: “Showed you all of my hiding spots / I was dancing when the music stopped.”

8. dorothea Taylor Swift has the uncanny ability to create such developed and well-rounded characters with such little information, which is what makes her storytelling so compelling. In “dorothea,” we learn much about the title character through the narrator’s eyes, and the relationship they once had. The lyric “skipping the prom just to piss off your mom and her pageant schemes” alone tells an entire story in itself. “dorothea” is also the companion song to “’tis the damn season,” just from the other person’s perspective, which helps shine even more light on the story. The narrator of “dorothea” reveres her but wonders if she’s still the same soul in L.A. as she was back in their never-changing town. Whatever the answer, they’re still willing to support her no matter where she is, but she’s always welcome back in Tupelo by her hometown love’s side if she ever just wants to be herself rather than someone known for who they know. Besides, they’re the only soul who can tell which smiles she’s faking. And you can always return to the road not taken. Best lyric: “They all wanna be ya / but are you still the same soul I met under the bleachers? / Well, I guess I’ll never know / and you’ll go on with the show.”

9. coney island feat. The National What really started the folklore / evermore journey was Taylor’s love for The National. Taylor has cited them as one of her favorite bands for many years, and as we know, this led to her beautiful new collaborative relationship with Aaron Dessner. So it would make sense for the track written with the intention of this duet to be so well executed; you can feel the love and care Taylor put into writing this song. In her press for these sister albums, she has spoken about trying to channel frontman Matt Berninger’s writing style. But what actually happened was she just produced her own signature lyricism at its sharpest. “We were like the mall before the internet, it was the one place to be / the mischief, the gift-wrapped suburban dreams / sorry for not winning you an arcade ring over and over,” is a hall of famer Swift-ian lyric. “coney island” explores the confusion, hurt, and self-reflection when a passionate affair burns out fast because you did not prioritize that person. And to top it off, Swift and Berninger’s harmonies are achingly beautiful, transporting you right there in the story, on the bench, wondering, over and over. Best lyric: “Do you miss the rogue who coaxed you into paradise and left you there? / Will you forgive my soul when you’re too wise to trust me and too old to care?”

10. ivy Leave it to Taylor Swift to make a song about an affair sound so romantic, and so sympathetic to the narrator, that you’re rooting for adultery. “ivy” tells the tale of a woman in a lifeless marriage, likening her home with him to the tombstone that the widow in town visits each day. I like to think this is the same wife whose husband was out there building other worlds without her in “tolerate it,” because then that means she found someone who celebrates her love, who holds her pain for her, who blooms all over her; they started it, but she’s fighting for it all the way to the end, nonetheless. “ivy” showcases Swift’s gorgeous vocals and her sharp lyrics, with a melody so infectious it is bound to permanently plant its roots in your dreamland. Best lyric: “Oh, I can’t stop you putting roots in my dreamland / my house of stone, your ivy grows, and now I’m covered in you.”

11. cowboy like me With the beautifully blended backing vocals of Marcus Mumford, “cowboy like me” is an entrancing love story of two con artists who lost at their own game and got conned into forever with each other. She’d gone from swindling old men for their money and fancy cars to falling victim to the danger of dancing with someone who only has eyes full of stars, and she knows she’ll pay for it. “cowboy like me” is one of the most romantic tracks on the record, proving that life never plays out quite as we plan. Best lyric: “Now you hang from my lips like the gardens of Babylon / with your boots beneath my bed / Forever is the sweetest con.”

12. long story short One of the more pop-sounding tracks on evermore, “long story short” is pretty much a summary of the long story behind reputation (2017). The song is filled with various metaphors for her reputation crumbling around her, and then finally putting her defenses down to be with her lover, someone as “rare as the glimmer of a comet in the sky.” It is a sweet ode to her boyfriend, and a gentle comfort to her past self that it will all work out. But it is also an oddly relatable example of how we shrug off our struggles and minimize them to just a “bad time,” when the time she is singing about was obviously something that deeply affected her (as will be further explored in the title track); but sometimes it actually feels good to just shrug it off as just a blip in your life, because at the end of the day, you survived, and that’s what counts- even if you’re not keeping score anymore. Best lyric: “Pushed from the precipice / clung to the nearest lips / long story short, it was the wrong guy. / Now I’m all about you.”

13. marjorie Whereas track 13 on folklore was a tribute to Swift’s paternal grandfather, evermore’s track 13 is a tribute to her maternal grandmother, Marjorie Finlay, who was an opera singer in the 50s, and passed away in 2003 when Taylor was 13 years old. “marjorie” is quite possibly the most touching track Taylor has ever written thus far in her career. Grief is one of the most difficult topics to tackle in a song; the genius of “marjorie” is that it is simple, yet not understated. Swift reflects on the profound lessons she learned from her grandmother, about the difficult balances of kindness and cleverness, and politeness and power. She curses herself for not cherishing the moments she had with her, for complaining rather than understanding in the moment how admirable her spirit was, for all the amber skies she’d love but will never see. The chorus, blunt and hard-hitting, reminds us that someone does not have to be living to be alive, to be all around, to be with us. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were singing to me now,” Taylor sings towards the end of the song, right before you hear a sample of Finlay’s opera singing in the background, a truly eye-swelling moment. It is clear that Finlay played a pivotal role in Swift’s own ambitions, as she sings, “all your closets of backlogged dreams, and how you left them all to me.” Marjorie knew she was leaving them in good hands. If you haven’t yet, check out the moving lyric video for the song, where you can see photos and video clips of Marjorie, both throughout her career and in her time with Taylor. Best lyric: “Never be so polite you forget your power, / never wield such power you forget to be polite.”

14. closure On the most experimental track musically on the record, Taylor writes off her need for closure from a relationship of some sort, whether it be romantic or platonic or business, all of which can cause hurt of equal intensity. The subject of the song is trying to make nice with Taylor, and she is just not having it, as it is not coming from a genuine place, but rather to ensure that their life remains picture perfect, or to clear their guilty conscience, or to preserve their own ego. This is a deeply relatable sentiment; as valuable as forgiveness can be, sometimes the person who hurt you just doesn’t deserve it, and all you can do is forgive yourself for blocking their number or shredding their letters. Best lyric: “I know I’m just a wrinkle in your new life / staying friends would iron it out so nice.”

15. evermore feat. Bon Iver To close out the standard edition of the album, Taylor joins forces once again with Justin Vernon of Bon Iver, with whom she collaborated on the Grammy-nominated duet, “exile” for folklore. However, Swift leads most of the track this time, lamenting the difficult time she went through in 2016. The piano and Swift’s vocals are haunting, particularly when she describes this time in her life as “catching my death,” consumed by a pain that she feels will never end. If you’ve ever been depressed, you know what that feels like, and the dark places it leads you. Although she is singing about a time four years prior, it sounds so present, and it is heartbreaking to hear her in such a state. When Bon Iver comes in, the tempo of the song picks up, the piano riff becomes more erratic, like a winter storm hitting you in the face, and he voices all the anxieties of the cost of such a downfall. But through those anxieties, Taylor finds not a cure, but an anchor in love, and then the tempo slows back down. By the end of the song, Taylor has the foresight to understand that although it may not feel like it now, the pain she is experiencing is not permanent (a sentiment my therapist has been trying to instill in me for years). In her Apple Music interview with Zane Lowe, Taylor explained how the lyrics parallel the times we are in currently, and so it feels really special to have the album end with someone who knows how it feels to be imprisoned by your pain gently comfort us with the wisdom that “this pain wouldn’t be for evermore.” I hope one day soon, as we leave 2020 far behind, we can all truly believe her. Best lyric: “I was catching my breath / barefoot in the wildest winter catching my death.”

16. right where you left me (bonus track) The first bonus track on evermore, “right where you left me,” captures a moment so earth-crushing, a piece of you is trapped in it forever. In this song specifically, the narrator finds herself stuck in the same corner of a restaurant where she was told by someone she loved that they had met someone else. “Glass shattered on the white cloth, everybody moved on,” she sings in mourning. We have all experienced those moments that we could teleport back to if we just closed our eyes; the scenery, what you wore, the smell and taste of the season, the very point in your body where it felt like your insides were collapsing. Or that one particular person, who is long-gone from your life but seeing them is like time-travelling back to that person you once were, ready to pick up where you left off. But as much as you want to stay in that moment forever, just in case it changes in your favor, the cold reality is that the world stops for no one. Best lyric: “If our love died young, I can’t bear witness / And it’s been so long, but if you ever think you got it wrong / I’m right where you left me.”

17. it’s time to go (bonus track) “right where you left me” was Taylor’s cry for help to get out of restaurant, and “it’s time to go” is the answer to the call, as she sings in the first line, “when the dinner gets cold, and the chatter gets old / you ask for the tab.” This song is about gathering the strength to leave situations and relationships behind that no longer serve you. She grieves the betrayal of someone she thought to be a twin from her dreams (almost definitely referring to former friend, Karlie Kloss), acknowledges that keeping a marriage together for the sake of the kids often actually has the opposite intended effect (possibly- but not certainly- something she and her brother experienced), and recounts attempting to bargain with someone consumed by greed, only able to leave with herself (absolutely referring to the end of her fifteen-year long business relationship with Scott Borchetta, her former record-label owner). But as painful as leaving all of those situations was, Taylor has gained the wisdom to understand that walking away sometimes takes as much strength as persevering. You can’t stay at the restaurant, or at the mercy of someone else forever; you have to forge your own path, even if it’s in the opposite direction of what you envisioned for so long. And even with all her past success behind her, as folklore and evermore have proved, there is so much more ahead of her. Best lyric: “That old familiar body ache, the snaps from the same little breaks in your soul / You know when it’s time to go.”

In a time where we are all trapped in our homes and in our heads, the folklore/evermore experience has been the sweetest escape. If anything, the creation of these wonderful sister records has taught me that our most powerful tool in times of distress is our own imagination. Even just the ability to close my eyes while listening to one of these tracks and feel the character’s story is a gift. The way I’ve always been able to pick up Harry Potter and escape to Hogwarts when I’ve felt alone and friendless, I can listen to folklore and evermore when I feel scared or hopeless and escape into this enchanted forest Taylor has built, where I can climb above the trees and see it all for what it is. I feel so lucky to watch Taylor’s imaginative world unravel around me. I can’t wait to see what she creates next.

DISCLAIMER – REVIEWER’S BIAS: I would literally die for this bitch.

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dirtycccat · 4 years ago

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the demon bros+ undateables showing their love

thought about this for 5 min then had to write it out so enjoy

lucifer

first off you notice he treats you differently

and by differently i mean like you’re his favorite child sibling

you get away with anything??? and he’s softer with you than with the others (which is canon)

then you see that?? he keeps buying you stuff you said you wanted when he was present

and you’re ofc impressed

but you’re more impressed by how open he’s around you

he’ll leave most of his walls down around you

which means you’ll get to experience unfiltered lucifer

he’ll laugh around you more, make dumb dad jokes, nap with his head in your lap, complain drunkenly about his work and bros, give you sloppy cheeks and forehead kisses

you find it rly cute though

if you’re in the human world he’ll 100% take this chance to send you beautifully written letters asking you how you are and leaving some verses that reminded him of you on the back like a 19th century vampire

“dear mc, how is your life? mine is filled with woe and unease since i do not have the light of my life around anymore...anyway here’s a poem about being horny and alone by a 18th century romantic author hope to see you soon, xoxo lucifer”

you try to respond in the same way and send him memes on the back instead of poetry (or real poetry depends on your mood)

mammon

protective of you 100% will throw hands with anyone that even glances weirdly your way

but also wants to show you off? like look at this human!!! this is MY human!!!

gives you random thoughtful gifts that reminded him of you

wants to be around you 24/7 so he invites you to all the events that he thinks you’ll like

you wanna party? perfect. you wanna go on a weird ghost stories tour around the city? cool. you wanna waltz in one of those old people parties? he’s already reserved two tickets. you just wanna lay around and nap? he’s already on your lap.

it doesn’t matter if you’re in a romantic relationship or not this man WILL serenade you outside your window

rapunzel style with an acoustic guitar or with a boombox like a rebel 80s kid

anyway here’s toxic by britney spears babe this is for YOU

levi

considers you his bff ofc

but also at first he’s still really awkward around you and doesn’t really know what to do for you and feels bad thinking only you do things for him

until you reassure him you enjoy just being around him so it’s fine

he blushes and starts inviting you more to his room to game/ watch stuff

at some point he starts buying two tickets to all concerts he goes to and invites you along

but also? he asks you what you’re into and starts marathoning your favorite animes/ movies/ series so he can talk with you abt them

you feel really moved that he’d do that for you??? like??? bruh...

your relationship is basically friends respecting each other and wanting to know each other the best through their passions even if it means getting into some weird shit

it’s rly wholesome tho

if you’re romantically involved he’ll totally do roleplay as your favourite character and you do the same for him and it’s really cute

also imagine: artistic collabs. you make fanart together??? you can program games together???? you do cosplay together??? the possibilities...

satan

he’ll hate to be compared to his dad brother but he does show how much he trusts you by showing his unguarded side too

when he first talked about lucifer without the filter of his nice guy persona you were pretty shocked

like he was really going at it

but then you realize? he’s just like that when he’s comfortable

and it’s not all mean spirited, he just has,,, a strong personality and a lot of opinions about stuff (which you sometimes share with him)

but you also found out it’s really fun to gossip with satan

since he knows all the juicy gossip from his multitude of ties (he’s sharing the title of gossip queen with asmo that’s why they get along so well tbh)

also if you even find a teacher you hate he’ll tell you all their embarrassing moments to make you feel better

he also recommends you books and poems and sends you quotes that made him think about you

so you sure as heck don’t need to buy books while you’re in the devildom bc he’ll buy you an entire library

asmo

compliments you without comparing you to himself which is the highest compliment he can give

like mammon he’s more into the showing everyone his favorite human around while also protecting them

he’ll take you to his parties and gatherings as a guest of honor, he’ll make you meet all kinds of people and open up opportunities for you

he’ll be the one that pampers you

you’d think lucifer is the sugar daddy of the family but nope it’s asmo

he’ll buy you cute clothes, shoes, beauty products everything that he saw and imagined would look bomb on you

if you’re not into clothes he’ll buy you art supplies, books, anything you want but he’ll still probably buy you at least some clothes he thinks are cute

if you’re romantically involved,,,, he’ll buy other toys for you as well which you can try together wink wink

beel

cooks for you

no questions asked when it’s his turn to cook he’ll think about what YOU would like to eat first before making something

which is??? really touching coming from beel

and also means sometimes he’ll make the same dish three weeks in a row and annoy the others while you just get excited bc ??? you get to eat your favourite dish??? again and again????

thank you beel you truly know how to touch someone’s insides

also opens up to you and talks to you about his fears and thoughts

expect to get 4 am msgs from beel if he had a nightmare

which would end up in you coming to cuddle him (and belphie also joins sometimes)

which tbh is that even a thing you can complain about?

belphie

is more baby less murder when you’re around

naps on your lap, naps on your shoulder, naps with you anywhere

but also let’s you nap on HIM

besides being soft around you he actually opens up to you too

and talks to you about his traumas and issues

which he has in common with his twin what can you do

so you have weekly cuddle parties with him and beel where you talk about shit and actually make them resolve their issues instead of just,,, ignoring them

also if you’re into each other you probably tease each other and flirt really shamelessly in public while the others cringe and or blush at your language

are you a cowboy? because i want you to ride me all night

simeon

writes you fancy letters with poetry like lucifer, but his ink is scented and his envelopes contain pressed flowers more often than not

if you’re together you even do letter sexting if you’re into it

creates characters based on you in his stories (which you don’t believe even if levi points out you that the two of you are kinda similar)

asks you to spend more and more time with him and luke

invites you to picnics, reads to you while your head is in his lap, cooks you snacks

if you’re a theatre kid too,,, you do musical love confessions too,,, sometimes by just reciting the lyrics of really popular musical theatre songs in a death panned voice

cough a heart full of love from les mis but read like poetry through the fence of the house of lamentation cough

asks you cryptic shit hannibal style like “tell me mc what does it mean to want to be consumed whole by another? is it a desire to become something bigger than yourself or is it related to our need to become one with our loved one like some cultures pointed out before?”

you’re either really into his cryptid talk or just roll your eyes and smooch him

diavolo

invites you around to his castle all the time

sometimes he even pulls some weird shenanigans just to make you spend more time with him

expect tea parties with him luci and barbatos in no particular combination

gives you compliments 24/7 even in public

remember how he treats lucifer? he’s that for you too but he’s learned from the lucifer experience to focus on complimenting you as a person more than how you look

if you’re into pda he’ll touch you all the time

if you ever wanted a gomez - morticia romance, here’s your goth big titty himbo that’s way too full of love

if you’re lovers expect to be pampered, i feel like? he doesn’t buy a lot of gifts and such because he’s probably tired of material things but he will make time in his busy schedule for you and spend a lot of time with you

which means more to him than gifts

(we will buy you anything you ask though)

barbatos

actually talks with you about stuff outside rad, the demon bros and diavolo

also invites you to alone time tea or wine time

where you drink and gossip

if satan and asmo are the crowned queens of gossip barbatos is the king of gossip but he doesn’t share his knowledge to most people so nobody knows what he knows

but he knows,,,, a lot

and not only that he knows a lot about people nowadays,,, but imagine the things he knows about like historical figures and such,,,

so prepare for story time with barbatos where he talks about how oscar wilde was almost summoned by drunk inccubi during a party once, or how diavolo cried when he was a kid because he sent a letter to caravaggio asking him to paint his portrait and he said no

also if you get drunk together expect really energetic talkative barbatos destroying DESTROYING everyone (except diavolo ofc)

“lucifer please i once saw you crying because you thought diavolo was ignoring you when you actually forgot to press the send button to your messages ”

if you’re romantically involved diavolo will always be first in his hear but that just means you’ll have to invite diavolo along on your dates which just means you’ve got a new lover and a new bff

solomon

he invites you on all kinds of wacky adventures

you visit witches, go to weird magical forest parties or orgies if you want, you go travelling the mountains for rare herbs

it’s like you’re faust and he’s mephisto haha the irony and he’s showing you another side of the world you never knew

ofc the others know about all this but??? they thought it’s normal and didn’t even consider you know nothing about it

but solomon knows what it was like to be just a human

and since he likes you he empathizes with your situation

he also make you meet all kinds of people

since he has 72 contracts and hundreds of years of doing wack stuff he must know some interesting people

and now his friends are your friends

i feel like romantic solomon would be just him?? but less shady with you especially since now you understand him better

but also he’ll probably bring you weird shit from his alone expeditions

did you ever want the tears of a mermaid? a carnivorous plant that feeds on emotions? a crying portrait? no? well too bad because now you have a room full of weird items

...that you love and treasure thank you very much

722 notes · View notes

maybe-your-left · 4 years ago

Note

ASK FRIDAY - CREATE A SCENARIO: roommates trope with Kylo

Due to some last minute room swapping and late registering Reader and Kylo end up in the same dorm but they're mad about it and hate each other (cue intense sexual tension)

Dorm room, Snowed in, evening time like 6

The heater/power has just gone out and Kylo knows a few ways to get warm...only if Readers up for it...

been working on this for FOREVER ANON.

I loved it!

Crushed

TW: NSFW, dirty talk, dom/sub vibes, exhibitionism, kinda fluff, Kylos not that nice and is an entitled man.

Oh yeah, you fuckin’ slut.

Yes-Yes-Yes!

‘M gonna cum all over your fucking tits.

You slapped the wall next to your bed, hard.

“Can you guys keep it down! It’s 1 in the morning!”

Muffled voices came through the paper-thin wall, sounding like bodies moving to the floor. Good, you thought, at least he will get rug burn from the shitty carpet, might keep him from fucking everything that moves.

A hard knock on the wall pulled you from that thought.

“Go read your fucking Bible! I’m trying to get my dick wet!”

“Please!”

“Why don’t you go get fucked!?”

Some giggled came through next, followed by more muffled whispering. You whined loudly, trying to ignore the sounds of him fucking whatever bimbo your dormmate had in his lair. Shoving your face into your pillow, muffling your tears and wails.

You turned on your TV, drowning out the final act of his performance. Fingers poised over your keyboard to file another noise complaint with the RA… not like they ever helped you. The last time they intervened they left with a black eye and broken nose, shrugging for you to sort it out yourselves.

A door slammed shut, you let out a sigh of relief.

At least he wasn’t a cuddler.

You climbed out of bed, tip-toeing to your door to take a peek of whatever slut found her way into his room this evening. The special lady was a new cinderella every fucking week, he didn’t even try to know their names. You heard him admit it once in class to his friends, saying he called them all ‘baby’ so he wouldn’t have to learn.

You peeked out the door, blinking from the harsh fluorescent lighting of your dingy dorm halls. The walls were a screaming white, yellowing from years of shoddy cleaning. You tried to clean your room when you first came to school, but it was too disgusting.

A non-smoking dorm, ha. Everyone smoked, especially your neighbor.

“Shouldn’t you be in bed creeper?”

You jumped at his voice, exhaling harshly through your nose. You steeled your features, caught red-handed looking for his latest prey. Crossing your arms defensively, not that there was anything to hide. You were in your ratty pj’s, they were on sale at Old Navy a few years ago and you never threw them away even though they barely fit anymore.

“If you’re so interested in being a cuck,” he grinned at you, flashing his crooked teeth, “I would love to have you over for an encore, I’m sure you’d love to watch me in action.”

“Buzz off, Ren.”

“Ooo, angry tonight,” he smirked, now stepping out of his door frame. You choked a little at his appearance, no shirt on, basketball shorts barely hanging off his hips. Dangerously low, seriously, if he took one wrong move they would be on the floor. His chest was covered in fresh scratch marks, no doubt from his latest victim, a sheen of sweat glistening under the lights.

Fuck, he was good-looking.

But he was terrible.

“Ahem,” he cleared his throat, daring you to stare back at him.

You gulped, caught again. You were better than that, you were just tired from being kept up since ten with his version of ‘love-making’.

“My eyes are up here cupcake,” he stepped forward. Pushing you back into your doorframe, almost inside your sanctuary. “If you ever decide you want to break your vow of chastity, I’m right next door.”

“Step away from me, Kylo.”

He cocked his brow, “I love when you’re mean, come on. Let’s see if kitty has claws.”

You bared your teeth, fists balling under your underarms, “Not even if you were the last man on Earth.”

He shrugged, backing away from you.

“Deal, bitch.”

You moved to shut your door on him, “Go away.”

“See you in class, bright and early.”

------

When you imagined leaving for college, it was different.

Saying goodbye to your parents, packing your car with whatever small valuables you owned. Determined to make a name for yourself all the way across the country, no friends or family, truly on your own. You imagined everything would be different, the dorm would be filled with new and friendly faces.

RA’s greeting you as you parked outside, giving you a tour and maybe a group lunch with all your floormates. Getting to know each other, maybe even going to some new-student orientation event they planned for the newbies.

Classes were smooth, acing all your major requirements. Professors were kind and ready to help you at any moment, letting your artistic vision flow through your body every morning with your 8 AM yoga class.

But no.

Instead, you registered late.

Your classes all at the worst times, bright and early.

Second rate dorm, COED even… smelly dudes between your single bedroom which would be better defined as a broom closet. Burping and fucking on both sides of you while you tried to study. Your major requirement classes were boring and filled with pretentious art students who thought they were the next Picasso.

Professors didn’t care if you lived or died, only focusing on the bell schedule because they couldn’t control what the freshmen did in their classes.

Your options for clubs were limited, either join a sport or a cult.

And worst of all.

Kylo Ren.

He was your neighbor, signed up late just like you. You actually arrived at the same time, he pushed you down on your ass in the lobby so he could be checked in first. Calling you a clumsy bitch, only for you both to be handed keys to the same floor. Right next to each other, sharing a flimsy wall.

On top of that, he was an art major like you.

And since he registered late, he was in almost every class.

Even yoga!

He took your mat the first day, leaving you in tears in the hallway. He apologized afterward, handing it back to you before storming off to be with his beefy upper-class friends. Any moment he could, Ren would humiliate you. Trying to push your buttons, whistling at you when you had to cross the hallway to the showers. Tripping you when you had your hands full, making fun of you for hanging out with your sparse group of friends.

And when he found out you were annoyed with him making noise, he latched onto it.

One week he decided to recite the entire Phantom of the Opera, just because you mentioned in class that you loved that play.

He did every part, even the musical scores, you could’ve sworn he did it with a megaphone on the wall, just to spite you.

Your parents told you ‘he just likes you, he’s a boy.’

No!

That’s not how people express feelings, at least not healthy people.

Your alarm clock blared on your nightstand, you didn’t sleep so it didn’t bother you. Letting out a heavy sigh of defeat, Ren ruined another night for you, a night you’d never get back. Of precious, precious sleep that you desperately deserved.

Slipping on some plum leggings and a sports bra. No one gave a fuck about your outfit in your early morning class, as long as you went with clothes on. You popped on your headphones, trying to drone out the noise of Ren’s music through the wall. He liked to blast some god-awful music every morning.

Today, it was an old Black Veil Brides album!

You made it out of the dining hall, snatching a muffin for breakfast. Smiling at some guys you knew, waving at your friend Rose as you stormed off to the gym. The cold chill of Winter biting at your nose, it was too cold to not wear a full outfit. But there was no time, with Ren keeping you up all night and classes back to back, you didn’t have time to fuck around with dressing up.

Ren ran in after you, laughing with his friends. Big nose all red from the frost, his hair looked frozen to his scalp, probably showered beforehand. You rolled out your mat, trying to stretch while he bragged about the pussy he got last night. Making a big show of your complaining, saying you were desperate to fuck him based on your whining.

You rolled your eyes when he planted next to you, “Good morning, you ran out in a hurry.”

“I didn’t want to be late,” you sneered, not giving him the time of day, still stretching your back into child's-pose.

“How are we supposed to walk together if you run away from me, cupcake?”

You scoffed, shooting him an icy glare. Despite him grinning at you like the happiest man on Earth, god, you needed to stop giving him a reaction. That would shut him up if you didn’t give him the attention he is clearly lacking from his parental figures.

“Good morning class,” your teacher greeted you calmly, “I hope you’re all doing well. As you all know, this next week is finals week, I’m offering makeup classes to those of you who need to make up some credit hours. We are also hosting some meditation if you need time to relax between classes.”

Next to you, Ren leaned towards your mat, setting his hand right behind your back. You didn’t have to open your eyes to know he was hovering. Ready to devour you like a piece of meat.

“Hey,” he chuckled.

You stayed quiet, pushing back into his arm so he would move. Ren stayed put, purring in your ear, “Did you sleep well?”

“Move off my mat, Ren.”

He smirked down at you, “You seem stressed, do you want me to help by fucking your brains out.”

You shot off your mat, effectively knocking him onto his back. Laughing loudly in a relatively silent room of students trying to center themselves. He grinned from the floor, hands up in the air in defense, “I’m just offering to help you, Jesus!”

“Just,” you pointed in his face, hair falling out of your ponytail. Everyone was staring at you, even your instructor. Shocked you were yelling, you barely spoke in class, at the scariest person in your class.

“Just, leave me alone.”

------

Ren avoided you for the rest of the week, mostly.

Still had his nightly fuck-more subdued though, you had on noise-canceling headphones to try and focus on studying. There were still so many classes to get to, and you wouldn’t be finished until the day before Winter break… you were desperate to get this over with.

You missed your family, the plane ticket itself cost you a whole month of meals.

Of course, you would do fine in your classes, it was just the motivation to get there. Every morning you glared at Ren when he greeted you in yoga, still standing next to you like a menacing shadow.

This morning was no different, only you skipped class to study in the library. Bundled up in your winter coat, long black scarf, hair in a lazy braid, and thermal leggings on. The wind had picked up last night, bringing on an ice storm that wasn’t expected until late next week. You walked on treacherous sidewalks, dodging all the other students who were seeking the warmth of the library.

You settled inside, sprawling your books and laptop on an old desk. Grabbing out a few sketch pads so you could finish up some pieces that were due in a couple hours. Most of your finals in art were ‘unconventional’ which meant the professor wanted to see what you were motivated to work on during the year.

For yours, you had decided to draw the people you saw on campus.

Studying their faces, mannerisms, languages while they were in an organic environment. It was a great piece, and one of your professors was very interested in showcasing it in a show. You were proud, it wasn’t large but it was important for you and you wanted it to be perfect before turning it in.

Your pastels were spread out, fingertips smudged and stained from charcoal, a few lines on your face and brow from forgetting about the streaks. There was this one person you couldn’t finish, it was one of your friends from last week. She was laughing and holding a drink, the expression wide and full of emotion but it was hard for you to capture without her being there.

But you steeled yourself, you weren’t leaving this spot until you finished her.

“You smudged that dude's face,” a low voice rumbled behind you. A finger pointing down at the top left corner, “Stop-don’t touch it.”

You moved to swat the hand away, not wanting some random guy to ruin your piece with their grubby fingers. Recentering yourself, he wasn’t smudged, he was just in the corner so it looked like it wasn’t finished… what did he know, anyway?

“You didn’t draw me?”

Now you stopped, why you didn’t recognize the timbre of his voice was ridiculous.

You let out a long sigh, “Please, don’t touch the canvas, Kylo. It’s not ready, yet.”

The chair that housed your backpack slid out next to you, your things tossed on the ground carelessly before Ren sat. You scooted away from him, he smelled like he just showered. Judging by his wet hair you were probably right… “What are you doing?”

He shrugged, fiddling with one of your notebooks. Flipping through pages carelessly, “I don’t know-you weren’t in yoga so.”

“So,” you gave him a weird look, “You stalked me to the library?”

“There’s no reason to go to yoga if I can’t bother you,” he flashed a smile, dropping it slightly when he saw you weren’t playing back with him.

Silence fell over you both, the only noises the heat kicking in around the scuffling of boots and shoes to face the weather again.

“I like your piece,” he gestured to your work, “For drawing, right?”

You nodded stiffly, not enjoying his friendly tone. Like he wasn’t your demon neighbor who made it his job to annoy you and had for the past four months of your life. Ren shifted again, now leaning on the table with his cheek resting on his forearm. Looking at you with wide eyes, you never took the time to look at his face.

He had very large eyes that betrayed his emotions. Swimming with flecks of auburn, gold, and some streaks of green, blinking slowly as he studied your canvas. You looked away from him, trying to ignore the urge to draw them, how his long lashes rivaled your own. How his skin was freckled with beauty marks, creases from frowning lined his forehead and nose. You could even make out his stubble, some pieces he must’ve missed the last time he shaved.

You went back to drawing, no longer focusing on it. Just trying to understand what was happening, your tormentor was a foot away from you. Breathing calmly like a cat laying in a patch of sun. Hunched over the edge, torso too long to rest like a normally proportioned human being, had he always been this big?

“Wanna get coffee before class?”

“Huh?”

You blinked slowly, not registering that he spoke to you.

Ren leaned off, letting out a big yawn and scratching the back of his neck.

Yes, definitely a cat.

“Do you want to get coffee,” he stared blankly, “Before we head to English?”

You looked down at your mess, then back up at him. Shaking your head softly, voice quiet as a mouse, “No-thank you.”

He exhaled harshly, “I’m not gonna burn you with it, it’s just coffee.”

“No, I’m fine,” you said firmer, “I wanna work on this some more.”

Ren stayed still, probably trying to think of a way to get you to agree with him. You had known him long enough to know he doesn’t like people disagreeing with him. Didn’t have to be a college graduate to see that the man had issues with control, hence terrorizing you all semester. You didn’t want to offer him an olive branch, because he was just doing it as a joke. Probably, waiting until you were calm around him to do something cruel.

You went back to drawing, listening to him get up and leave you. Mumbling something under his breath about ‘trying to be nice’ before walking out. You shook off the awkwardness, not willing to break down and let him do something nice for you, just because he didn’t ruin your final piece didn’t mean he wouldn’t do something in the future.

The day was still young.

------

Oddly enough, Ren didn’t bother you that evening.

Not even a door slam!

You almost thought he was dead, but you saw him in the hallway when you were walking to the bathroom. Wrapped in your robe, caddy in hand, he didn’t whistle or try to touch your ass like he normally did. Just a stale smile before closing himself back in his room.

Not to waste the precious quiet, you went to work packing your bags for your trip tomorrow. Deciding to do a quick load of laundry, your hall was almost empty, so no one would be down there while you waited.

Piling up your hamper, you threw your pj's and slippers on. Remembering to grab a blanket and your laptop so you could hang out down there while you waited.

Your friends back home were all excited to see you, ready to hear all about your time away. The boys you met, friends you made, classes, all that. So excited to get home and see your cat, Gremlin, he was all alone without you. Your mom sent you pictures earlier of him curled in your blankets, saying that he knew you were coming home soon.

Maybe next Fall you could get an apartment, you didn’t want to leave him for another year.

A washing machine door slammed shut next to you, causing you to jump from your perch atop your own. Faced with Ren, who was doing his laundry in his pjs, or his version of pjs. Giving you another tight-lipped smile before leaning against the far wall. Yawning loudly before sliding down the wall to sit on the floor.

You ignored him, turning back to your laptop that was playing a crime documentary. Texting some friends to keep your mind from wandering to Ren and why he was in such a mood.

“Are you leaving tomorrow?” Ren called from his wall.

You pretended to not hear him, refocusing on the documentary, there was something very interesting happening and you weren’t about to miss how they found the killer's shoe prints in the mud just because Ren was trying to talk to you.

Then something was thrown at you, and it smelled awful.

“Oh-my-god!”

You shot off the washing machine, throwing down the offending garment. Ren was laughing loudly, “Chill out! It was just an old shirt!”

“How old was it?!”

He smiled at you from the ground, propping an elbow on his kneecap. One leg stretched out on the tile, you tried to regain a sense of calm, he was just messing with you again. Just take some deep breaths… in-out-in

“Are you leaving tomorrow, after our final?”

You let out your deep breath, sitting back on the washer. “Yeah,” you paused your show since mister meanie wanted to have a tea party. “I have to get to the airport right after.”

He hummed, “Same.”

The washer beeped loudly, echoing in the otherwise empty room. Ren watched you hop off, fixing your shorts which definitely rode up too much. Trying to not flash him your underwear as you bent to move your clothes to a dryer. You cursed when a sock fell from your pile, great.

“How come we’ve never fucked?”

Now all your clothes were on the floor.

Along with Ren, who was staring at you like you were an art exhibit.

You dragged your clothes back to the washer. There was no way you were finishing now that they touched the dirty floor, no one cleaned down here and just because it looked clean didn’t mean-

A whistle, “You good over there?”

“Yup.”

“Okay,” you heard him stretch, popping his joints as he lifted off the floor. You could feel his breath on the back of your neck as he closed in. Almost touching you, no escape, “As I was saying, how come you’ve never let me steal your virginity?”

You scoffed, “I am not a virgin.”

Ren pressed into you, pushing you against the washer now. Grinding his hips into your own, you squirmed, trying to dispel every fantasy flooding your brain. Every night you spent listening to him through the wall, imagining just once that it was you. If he weren’t such a monster, you would have gladly laid on your back and let him do whatever he wanted.

“Nothing?”

You took a deep breath, placing both palms on the top of the washer. Biting your lip as you silently pleaded for him to let you go, but also continue. You could smell his cologne from this close, how it complimented him so well. Mixing in with his dark aura, you wanted nothing more than to spin around and…

Soon you were doing just that, but not on your own violation.

Ren had his hands grasping your hips, thumbs slipping under the fabric of your t-shirt to caress your soft skin. Lips capturing your own, you froze in his hold. Unsure of what to do, a part of you wanted to scream and smack him, but the other part loved the smell of his toothpaste.

He relaxed when you relaxed, your lips still awkwardly locked together. Not opening and allowing for more, but not moving away either. You stared at him, startled to see him looking back at you. Pulling back slightly, you watched his face chase yours. Bringing your lips together a few more times, kissing at the seam.

You felt his tongue flick for entry, trying to pry your mouth open so he could explore. When you didn’t move he finally huffed in annoyance, “I know it’s your first kiss, but you’re supposed to open your mouth.”

You groaned, bringing both hands to cradle his cheeks. There was no way he was going to make fun of you, he initiated this so.

Ren made a muffled noise when you pressed your lips back together. Probably of shock and surprise, because, no. This was not your first kiss, not even your fourth or fifth kiss. Working your tongue skillfully into his mouth, you moaned softly at his taste. Just like you imagined… not that you put much stock into this but… it was wonderful.

Bringing your fingers to the nape of his neck, tugging on his dark brown hair. Just like you always wanted to, whenever he walked past you with it tied in a bun you dreamt of tearing through it. Ren returned your affection in kind, his left hand moving to the small of your back. Fingers dancing under the waistband of your pajama bottoms.

You heard him swear when he felt the lace underneath, nestled between your cheeks. Ren slid a hand over the globes of your ass, moving his hips in time with his tongue. Tasting every inch of your mouth, even growling in approval when you sunk your teeth into his bottom lip.

Petting and groping each other against the washing machines, the sound of you swapping spit barely heard over the rumble of your clothes. Ren had gotten sick of grinding against your hip bone, pulling away from you for a moment. Shushing your pathetic whimpers, he hooked the hand not cupping your ass behind your left knee.

Hiking it over his hip, opening your legs up. Allowing him to assault your center with his straining erection, oh you could picture it now. How easy it would be to just let him slip inside you.

Right here, in the laundry room.

*Beep*

You pulled back roughly, barely able to unsuction your lips from Rens' own. A string of spit connecting your kiss-bitten lips, he looked at you with pleading eyes. Grinding himself against you harder, pulling a few soft mewls from your throat.

“I need to switch my clothes,” you croaked.

He nodded, shakily setting your limb back on the floor and backing away. You watched through your own lust-filled state as he trembled. Walking back to his far wall, a hand cupping his cock through his sweats. Your throat clicked as you took in a much-needed breath, doing what you said you would.

Setting them in the dryer, all the more aware of his eyes watching your every move.

Not sparing him a glance when you sat back on the washer.

Turning on your laptop once again to watch your crime documentary.

Ignoring the throbbing between your legs, his deep breaths, and your shaking limbs.

------

The TV’s at the airport all said the same thing, “Record snowfall this winter, right before the holidays! Experts say that we will be lucky to keep power until it passes. Our friends on the west coast are enjoying a white Christmas, while we’re stuck in the North Pole.”

All flights have been grounded until further notice.

Stuck.

You could barely make it back to your dorm without crashing.

Bursting into tears several times when you realized you wouldn’t be home until it was over. Wouldn't be able to safely leave your dorm room until it passed, leaving you utterly alone.

You had emailed your RA letting him know your bad luck, he let the staff know you’d be there so they would have food and water running still.

But other than that, this was your holiday.

You slipped on the walk up to your room, sobbing loudly in the halls as you clutched your luggage. No going home, no seeing your friends or family, no Christmas dinner, no personal shower, no Gremlin to sleep on your face.

Collapsing on your bed, curling yourself in the multitude of pillows and blankets that adorned it. The room had shitty heating, the entire building had shitty heating. The entire month of December you’d been freezing, and no amount of personal heaters could fix this kind of cold.

You drifted off to sleep after crying for a few hours, letting your parents know what was happening. Setting alerts for earlier flights, anything you could do to get home. You were so tired in fact, that you slept through a power outage. Leaving the entire building to shut down, no backup generators.

And no heat.

It wasn’t until you felt yourself being lifted that you woke up to the commotion.

Squirming in the kidnappers' arms, limbs aching from freezing for a time in your bedroom. The window must’ve cracked open because it was much colder than when you arrived. Your attacker didn’t let you go, growling in your ear to be still.

Dragging you out of the building, towards a car you didn’t notice when you pulled in. With the snow swirling all around, it was a miracle they could see their own vehicle. You were thrown in the front seat, followed by your luggage tossed in the back. You stayed still, every time you moved it hurt, hypothermia. Common in the New England storms if you were foolish enough to be outside…

You about passed out when the driver's side door opened, Ren climbed in. Looking just as frozen as you, slamming the door shut and mumbling something as he started his car. You could’ve cried when the engine turned, heat blasting between the both of you.

“Hands,” his teeth chattered, holding his own out. He nodded for you to do the same, grasping your pink fingers between his own and blowing on them. “Power went out,” Ren took a shallow breath, “I was leaving and I saw your car. You were almost frozen to your bed, the window broke.”

“Th-thank you-u-u.”

Ren cringed at your fingers, slowly gaining back their normal color. “I tried to grab everything I could, like your backpack and luggage. But we can’t stay there, we’ll fucking freeze.”

You nodded, tugging your hands away to curl into your chest. Thankful that Ren had enough sense to grab blankets, stuffing them in your lap from the backseat. You thought about grabbing your phone, but you could barely make a fist so it would do you no good.

“My plane g-g-got ground-d-ed.”

Ren shivered, nodding sharply, “Mine too, my mom got me a hotel room not far from here to stay until the storm passes. So, I’m taking us there.”

“Okay.”

You didn’t say anything else, not wanting to distract him from the treacherous roads. Thank god he had a Jeep, or else you would’ve died. You couldn’t see more than ten feet ahead, less than that when you were on the highway out of the city.

Ren kept mumbling things like it’s okay, I’m sorry, I know it's cold, whenever you shivered and took in sharp breaths. You must’ve been out for a while, to get this bad. A quick look at the clock in his car said you’d been asleep for three hours, who knows what would’ve happened if he hadn’t noticed your car…

He helped you out, more carried you, towards the check-in desk. Too worried you would pass out in the car if he left you for too long, the front desk lady was quick and sweet. Making sure to send up extra blankets and pillows to your suite. Ren had you walk up with him, so he wouldn’t have to carry you and the luggage on separate trips.

You clutched his hand like a child, tight enough for his knuckles to turn white. But he was so warm, it’s all you could think about. All you wanted was to be warm, nodding blindly to whatever Ren said to do.

Plug your phone in, check.

Let him talk to your mom, check.

Draw a bath for you, check.

Climb in the bath with you, double-check.

It wasn’t until you were defrosted in the clawfoot tub that you realized you were naked with him.

Rens chest against your back, holding you like his life depended on it. Judging by his shaking, you both were probably suffering from acute hypothermia. You had been silent for so long your voice spooked him a little, “Thank you.”

He hummed into your hair, which was sitting on top of your head in a messy bun. “Are you okay?”

You nodded slowly, “Can we go lay down?”

“Yeah,” Ren hastily got out of the tub, draining it and wrapping you in plush towels. You were still too cold to blush from your nakedness, not how you pictured this going. You imagined you would finally give into him on some drunken party night, barely remembering his reaction to seeing you nude.

But now he had seen you half-frozen, forced to cradle you back to life.

------

You squinted from your cocoon, greeted by a dimly lit room.

One spare lamp on a dingy-looking nightstand, well it wasn’t terrible. It was better than your nightstand in your dorm room… where was your dorm room anyway?

Something vibrated behind you, followed by a heavyweight sprawling against your back.

You held your breath, you were in a hotel.

With a stranger.

“Shit,” you whispered.

Okay, you could wiggle out of here. You took a moment to study the room, there was the lamp from before, and some curtains on a metal rod in the far corner. If you managed to get out without being detected you could knock out the assailant.

“You smell so good.”

More weight settled on you, now you were trapped. This bear was closing in, who knows what happened while you were asleep! All you could remember was falling asleep at your dorm after the upsetting trip to the airport, then being dragged away.

Your fingers burning when you tried to use them, being shoved in a car…

Kylo.

“Kylo?!”

“Mhm.”

You threw your arms up, successfully throwing him off you and the covers. Your limbs screaming at the sudden movement, you were still suffering from the cold. Next to you, curled in a ball, totally catlike, was Ren.

A sleepy smile gracing his lips, hands curled under his cheek, and legs moving towards his chest, Like a child under a blanket. You gasped when you saw he was naked, “Fuck!”

You were too.

“What the fuck, Ren!?”

“Stop yelling,” you watched his hand bat his nose like an animal, “Come back, you were warm.”

You huffed, flailing off the bed in search of your bags.

Memories flooding back to you, he took you here after saving your life.

The bath.

Ugh, bad time to remember your kiss the night before.

Ren sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes and blinking slowly. You flushed red when you looked between his legs, shit. How does he walk around with that? Is that why he has bad posture? You choked on your spit when he spread his legs out.

Sprawling completely on the mattress like he wasn’t in a room with a stranger.

“Snow hasn’t stopped,” Ren yawned, snapping a hand and pointing between his legs, “Come back.”

“I’m not doing anything until you have clothes on.”

He rolled his eyes, now looking you up and down. Focusing on your bare tits, swinging around with your erratic movements. You watched him lick his lips, wagging his eyebrows, “Come on, don’t you want to sit back on the bed?”

You shook your head, crouching down to your bag. Trying to not flash him more of your goods, but that didn’t work. Not with him leaning to the side of the bed to make a show of him peeping on you.

A wolfish grin splitting his face, “You have a nice ass.”

“Can you stop,” you huffed, tugging on some sweats you found.

Ren made a pouting noise when you stood, pushing his bottom lip out while you threaded your arms through a t-shirt. You shivered a little-it was still freezing in the room. Probably from the weather, it sounded like it got worse… hopefully this place would keep power.

You looked back at the bed, Ren was still manspreading. One of his large paws crawling towards his cock, watching you with the same smirk. He let out a soft sigh when he touched himself, eyes momentarily shutting in bliss.

“Do you have to do that with me here?”

He cracked an eye open, “Do you have to be that far away?”

You scoffed, moving to the corner of the room. Shivering since you were near the window, you plopped down in the cheap armchair. Ignoring the sounds of his fist gliding along his cock, you tucked your feet under your body. Humming a tune to ignore the arousal growing between your legs, there was no way you were caving to him.

What kind of man does that with a complete stranger present!?

More importantly, why was it turning you on?

“Come here,” he whistled, you spared a glance at him. Blushing profusely at the sight, his cock was now fully erect. Standing tall and proud, tip flushed almost purple from want. You quickly looked away, trying to swallow down the drool that gathered in your mouth.

What would happen if you gave in?

Not like it would hurt you… he looked so delicious.

“If I come over there, what's gonna happen,” you whispered, determined to stay put.

With a deep breath, the mattress groaned under his weight, probably leaning back to get comfortable. He seemed to love you being there, watching him, or trying not to. Ren made a small non-committal scoff, “Whatever you want to happen, baby.”

“Don’t call me that, you know my name.”

“Meow.”

Your head snapped towards him, met with his grin. “Come on-you really want me to do this by myself?” he waved his cock, fist tight around the base. You rolled your eyes, training your eyes to focus on the least attractive part about him.

You were coming up empty, all you could stare at was his cock.

The prominent vein along the underside thrumming in time with his heartbeat. You could practically feel it along your tongue, rigid and stiff. Slowly, you stood from the chair, met with a soft whine from Ren. Eying your hungrily as you sauntered over, you planted a knee in the mattress.

Between his legs, which were spread obscenely wide, he licked his lips in anticipation.

“If I help you, are you going to be nicer to me?”

He nodded, chest taking in sharp breaths. You slowly leaned back on your heels, stripping your top off, despite him seeing you naked earlier. Surprised when he bit his bottom lip, watching you play with your tits, rolling them in the palm of your hand. Just to make him squirm a bit, “I’ll be nicer, whatever you want.”

“I’m really cold still,” you spoke softly, making sure to lean in close enough to graze his lips with your own before pulling away, “Can you help warm me up?”

“Yes,” Ren's hands shot out, kneading your flesh a few times. Debating to grasp your tits or the small of your waist, like a kid in a candy store. So many options, but you didn’t want to wait. If you were doing this, it would be about you.

“Eat me out.”

He stilled, cocking a brow, “Excuse me?”

“You heard me,” you exhaled on his neck, being sure to drag your kitty claws along his chest. Briefly grazing his nipples, savoring the way he gasped. “Eat me out, if you make me cum, I’ll let you fuck me. Like the desperate slut you are.”

Ren scowled for a moment, nudging your face from his neck. Eyes dancing across your face before capturing your lips, moaning softly in your mouth, “I can make you cum so hard you’ll never want another man again.”

You placed a soft kiss, rolling onto your back dramatically. Splaying your legs wide, “If that's true, why do you fuck a different girl every week?”

He growled at you, actually growled.

Hands no longer soft in their quest to memorize your skin, instead Ren pinned your legs hard enough for them to pop. Making you squeal from the stretch, “How fast do you think I can make you cum? Hm?”

Before you could answer, he dove in.

Lips wrapping around your clit and suckling fast, tongue flicking out every few seconds. You were already bucking up to meet him, but his firm hold kept you flush. While his tongue began to lap thick stripes along the seam of your pussy. Briefly hooking the tip into your entrance, both of you moaning when he tasted your wetness.

“Shit-Kylo!”

“Mm,” his voice vibrated against your clit, continuing his assault until you choked on your spit. You buried your fingers in his hair, keeping him in that right spot. “I’m so fucking close,” you cried out, pleading his name over and over and over.

“You know,” he popped off, smacking his lips that were glistening with your cum, “I’d rather you cum on my cock.”

“Wait-”

Ren flipped you onto your chest, yanking your hips into the air. You barely had time to take a breath before he shoved his cock inside you. His breath hitched as he sank to the hilt, you groaned at the stretch. Now this, this you could get used to.

He pulled out slowly, you heard him swear under his breath. Leaving just the tip of his cock inside and ramming his hips into yours. Pulling a loud scream from your lungs, Ren chuckled at that. Pumping his cock at a rough pace, “Shh-you’re going to upset our neighbors.”

You huffed, cheap shot, angling your hips a little so his cock would rub up against your front wall. Moaning when he picked up the pace, skin slapping skin. Ren leaned over your form, planting a hand on the headboard to keep it from knocking. You weakly lifted your head, clenching at the sight of his knuckles turning white.

All you could do was sit and take it, revealing in the bliss you’d denied yourself for four months.

-------

Ren dropped you both off at the airport two days later.

You spent three days together, fucking each other's brains out.

Choking on his cock while he was brushing his teeth, eating you out while you read through your newsfeed. Bouncing on his cock while he fed you breakfast, you didn’t need to change clothes the entire vacation.

But you wanted to go home and were thankful for the storm ending so you could head home. It was a little awkward, Ren wasn’t very excited about the snow stopping. It felt like he was trying to stall you leaving but reluctantly listened to your desire to fly home.

“Got everything?” he mumbled, hitching his backpack over his shoulder. The two of you were waiting in the TSA line, about to part ways to head home. You nodded, giving him a tight smile before stepping up on your own.

Ignoring the feeling of his eyes on the back of your head.

Both of you stood awkwardly after making it through, “Well-my gates over here,” you pointed behind you. Ren hummed in acknowledgment, kicking at the ground instead of looking at you.

“Thanks for letting me crash with you,” you tried again, still nothing.

You groaned, spinning on your heel. Back to being an asshole, you were kicking yourself for thinking he would be nicer. All he wanted was some pussy, and you willingly gave into him when you should’ve remained strong.

Your parents picked you up back at home, lots of tears and laughs were shared. Thankful that you made it home without freezing, your mom was grateful for your friend who saved your life. She wanted to call him and tell him how much she appreciated it but you shrugged it off, he was just being nice. He wasn’t your boyfriend or anything, you left out the part that he was the neighbor you always complained about.

Collapsing on your bed felt surreal like you would wake up and be back in the hotel room at any moment. It was odd not sleeping next to him, you had grown accustomed to his clingy arms. Circling you in the middle of the night when he thought you were dead asleep, smelling your hair before tucking you into his naked chest.

You tossed and turned all night, groaning when you were woken by your siblings to get up the next morning. Barely sleeping a wink, you resolved to take a nap later to try and not spoil your trip back home.

At breakfast, your mom yelled at you from the kitchen.

“Hey hon, someone’s calling you!”

“Just answer it,” you groaned through a mouthful of cereal. Briefly hearing your mother answer in a typical chipper tone, stalling mid-sentence before she yelled again, “It’s someone named Kyle?”

Shit, you shot to the kitchen.

Snatching the phone and escaping to the living room where no one was hiding.

“Kylo?”

Hey, didn’t think you’d answer.

“How’d you get my number?”

Took it while you were napping the other day, I knew you wouldn’t give it to me willingly.

You rolled your eyes, “Alright creeper, what’s up?”

Just wanted to talk or whatever, felt weird not to.

Silence.

Are you gonna let me buy you coffee when we are back?

“You were being serious about that?”

A scoff.

Yeah-or we could just fuck again if that’s all you want from this.

“Coffee sounds good.”

Cool. Cool.

It’s a date.

-------

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robininthelabyrinth · 4 years ago

Text

Spilled Pearls

- Chapter 15 - ao3 -

“I thought Sect Leader Wen was above visiting other sects,” Lan Qiren said sullenly, leading Wen Ruohan on a tour through the Cloud Recesses. He had nothing better to do: classes had been temporarily dismissed on account of sect business, what with the teachers all being recruited to receive the Wen sect’s retinue; at this rate, this year’s rogue cultivators wouldn’t learn anything of value, and Lan Qiren had the sneaking suspicion that it was somehow all his fault.

“I can’t imagine why you think that. Don’t I attend every discussion conference without fail?” Wen Ruohan said smoothly even though that wasn’t what Lan Qiren had meant and he knew it.

Wen Ruohan normally treated himself and his clan like the imperium, preferring to summon visitors rather than go to visit. Presumably, in this instance, it was only that his desire to bother Lan Qiren had overcome his vanity, or else perhaps he’d reminded himself that even the Emperor would sometimes summer at the homes of his lackeys, allowing them an unasked-for opportunity to pay homage to him.

Truly a very irritating man. Lan Qiren was almost entirely sure that it wasn’t his adolescent brain speaking, either, though he supposed he couldn’t discount the possibility entirely – he’d been very irritated by Cangse Sanren, too, and they were friends now.

Actually, he was still pretty irritated with her sometimes. Maybe it was just a symptom of adolescence. Or perhaps it was that strange similarity he sometimes found himself observing between them, whether it was their seeming timelessness or their overweening arrogance...

Well, when in doubt, there were always the rules: Do not disrespect your elders.

Also possibly Have affection and gratefulness, though that one had always been hard.

Lan Qiren took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds, and then released it, taking stock of himself: his walking pace was steady, his hands were clasped together so that they didn’t flail, and his appearance was calm. It was just a matter of getting his emotions under control, and he had plenty of experience with that.

“You’re right,” he finally said, releasing his irritation with an effort of willpower. “You do. I was being rude, and it was uncalled for. Is there any particular part of the Cloud Recesses that da-ge would like to see? I doubt the Library Pavilion or the main buildings have varied much since your last visit, but the gardens and wild forest are beautiful this time of year.”

Wen Ruohan was quiet for a while, the two of them walking side by side in silence, and then unexpectedly he said, “Does the Lan sect use well-water or river-water as your main source of drinking water?”

Lan Qiren stared at him in disbelief. “I’m not telling you that. That’s private!”

“Is it?”

“Not everyone’s like the Nightless City, telling everyone that they rely on a half-dozen imported sources for their food and drink and challenging them to try to do something about it,” Lan Qiren said crossly, and tried to remind himself Sneering for no reason is prohibited. “I’m not actually a half-wit, you know.”

“You misunderstand me,” Wen Ruohan said, though his eyes, narrow with satisfaction like a cat, suggested that he would have been more than happy to take advantage of the situation if Lan Qiren had been so foolish. “I only wished to know whether it was the source of water they are drinking that has rendered them all blind to the treasure they hold in their hands.”

“…I’m not showing you our treasury, either.”

Wen Ruohan barked a laugh. “That’s not what I meant, either. Why don’t you show me your Wall of Discipline? I’m sure there are a few new rules since last time.”

There probably were – the rules were like water, both eternal and in a constant state of flux – so Lan Qiren obediently turned his feet in that direction.

“It’s not a work-day,” he warned. “So you’ll miss out on any carving. But the rules are there, and I can answer any questions you have about them, if you like.”

“Any question? A bold claim.”

“Any question I know the answer to,” Lan Qiren clarified. “If I don’t, I can ask one of my teachers, or look at the books in the library.”

They walked in silence a little longer, although a surprisingly comfortable one given their age difference and Wen Ruohan’s general aura of barely restrained bloodthirst. Perhaps Lan Qiren was just getting used to it.

“Have I disturbed your afternoon plans with my visit?” Wen Ruohan eventually asked, gazing at the Wall contemplatively.

“I was going to meditate in the Cold Spring,” Lan Qiren said. “But it’s nothing I can’t do another time.”

“A Cold Spring?” A faint smirk flickered on Wen Ruohan’s face. “That’s useful for the suppression of yang energy.”

“And for cultivation, and for healing, and for encouraging clarity of thought,” Lan Qiren said, and managed to keep from rolling his eyes. “Of course, if da-ge is having some trouble controlling his lascivious thoughts, he is welcome to try it out. Such requests are not uncommon among newlyweds.”

Wen Ruohan was smirking outright now. “Tell me, little Lan, has that sharp tongue of yours ever cut the inside of your mouth? Or is that something you reserve for me?”

Lan Qiren pretended not to hear him and instead pointed out one of the rules on the Wall. “I always rather liked that one.”

Wen Ruohan glanced over and saw Have wins and losses - otherwise known, colloquially, as don’t be a sore loser - and grinned. “Oh, really? I find I’m rather partial to Honor the aged and wise, myself.”

“Really? And here I would have thought someone as humble as da-ge would opt for Do not say one thing and mean another, or maybe the prohibition against praising yourself.”

“Are you saying I do not count as aged, little Lan?”

“I would never question your years,” Lan Qiren said. “But the rule does include two clauses.”

Wen Ruohan was surprised into a snicker. “Sharp and sharper! Is this more of your vaunted Do not tell lies?”

“Be of one mind,” Lan Qiren retorted. “Anyway, you enjoy it, or else you would’ve just pointed out Do not argue with your family.”

“Indeed, I am not Qingheng-jun,” Wen Ruohan said, his smile poisonous, and Lan Qiren, struck dead on by the accurate blow, could only glare at him. “My little brother can argue with me any time he pleases…and does, I find. I told you to come to the Nightless City, and you disobeyed.”

“Learning comes first,” Lan Qiren said. “I had classes. Like I told you!”

“And your father and brother agreed with your prioritization?”

Lan Qiren winced, having not told them of Wen Ruohan’s request for exactly that reason.

Wen Ruohan only smirked, though, and did not call him out on it further. “Perhaps I will take you up on your offer,” he remarked instead, and for a moment Lan Qiren had no idea what he was talking about. “Travel is always so wearying, and I’ve heard fine things about the quality of the Cold Spring in Gusu.”

Right, that.

Lan Qiren was pretty sure he was allowed to make that offer.

“Unless of course you planned to have other company there…?” Wen Ruohan glanced at him and saw his confusion. “Your little immortal’s disciple lover?”

“Certainly not!” Lan Qiren exclaimed. “Men and women do not mix like that. Anyway, she’s not my lover. We’re only friends. She’s agreed.”

Wen Ruohan’s eyebrows went up as if Lan Qiren had revealed more than he’d intended.

“Very well,” he said, sounding almost agreeable. “I’ll take your word for it.”

Lan Qiren eyed him suspiciously.

“I’d still like to meet her.”

Of course he would.

“She might not like you,” Lan Qiren warned, shaking his head. Cangse Sanren was a warm and generous person, but her views were unshakable once set, and she feared nothing; he could only guess at the monstrous clash of egos that was about to take place. “But she should be by the training field at this time of day; we can go there next.”

Wen Ruohan reached out and ran his fingers along the Wall – seemingly at random, hitting Change clothes after taking a bath and No adornments that make sound as he did – and then turned to follow Lan Qiren with a look in his eyes that Lan Qiren did not understand.

“Then let us go,” he said.

As he’d thought, Cangse Sanren was practicing alone in the training field, looking especially fierce with her hair flowing freely in the wind as she danced with blade and horsetail whisk. Lan Qiren waited until she was done with her current set before clearing his throat to announce their presence; when she turned, he pulled out a ribbon from his sleeve – he’d taken to carrying spares – and offered it to her.

“I don’t know how many times I have to tell you,” he said to her. “It doesn’t matter how high your cultivation is, it’s still not going to help you in a fight if the wind changes mid-move and you get smacked in the face with your own hair.”

“Maybe,” she sniffed. “But I look amazing.”

Lan Qiren rolled his eyes.

“This is Cangse Sanren, a disciple of Baoshan Sanren,” he told Wen Ruohan. “She has no personal name, so don’t ask for one. Cangse Sanren, this is Sect Leader Wen.”

Lan Qiren had heard rumors that Wen Ruohan had once had a personal title, but that he hadn’t liked it, and that he’d ensured that no one ever dared to use it to his face. At any rate, Lan Qiren didn’t know it now and could not use it as an introduction.

Not that Cangse Sanren would have cared, of course. She raised her hands in a salute, boldly keeping her head raised and the bow shallow enough to be insolent.

“I’ve heard of you,” she said, her eyes slightly narrowed.

“And I of you,” Wen Ruohan responded. “It’s been a long time since a disciple has descended from the immortal mountain. Tell me, are you planning on joining the Lan sect?”

“I haven’t decided yet,” she said. “Are you planning on proposing some alternative you think I might like better?”

“Perhaps I will. You never know what the future might bring.”

“Knowing the present and the past would seem a sufficient guide to me.”

Lan Qiren looked between them in growing alarm as they exchanged seemingly pleasant words in cutting tones. It wasn’t that he hadn’t expected this, but perhaps not quite so quickly...

“Could the two of you maybe not do this?” he asked, feeling a little plaintive. He didn’t want to have to explain how a casual tour designed to kill time had escalated into an inter-sect issue. “Cangse Sanren, if my da-ge’s presence bothers you, we can just leave.”

Cangse Sanren broke away from the staring match she’d started with Wen Ruohan to frown at him. “You call him da-ge?”

“Is there any reason he shouldn’t?” Wen Ruohan’s voice was as smooth as the silk used to execute empresses. “He’s my sworn brother, after all.”

“Oh, I know that,” she said. “It’s only that he calls Qingheng-jun ‘xiongzhang’.”

Wen Ruohan seemed a little surprised by that. He glanced at Lan Qiren, who scowled back at him. “So what?” he said, feeling oddly defensive. “You asked to be called ‘da-ge’.”

“I suppose I did,” Wen Ruohan said, and his lips curled upwards in satisfaction.

“Hey, Lan-xiao-gege,” Cangse Sanren suddenly said, and Lan Qiren automatically glared: he didn’t like her calling him that. “Could you get me a ribbon from my room?”

“What? I just gave you –”

“There’s one in particular inside a qiankun pouch on my desk,” she said, barreling on. “You can just bring the whole thing. I need it rather urgently, and for various reasons cannot go myself.”

“But –”

“You shouldn’t deny a lady in need, little Lan,” Wen Ruohan interjected. “Don’t forget that chivalry is one of your rules. Go and return; I will wait for you here.”

“And I’ll keep an eye on him to make sure he does,” Cangse Sanren said, which was horribly rude even if he did somewhat need that reassurance. “Please, Qiren-gege? Would you?”

“…all right,” Lan Qiren said, having the distinct feeling that he was being ganged up on. “I’ll be back right away.”

There was a rule against running, but he’d long ago mastered the art of walking as quickly as he could without breaking any of the rules against haste; he was able to retrieve the pouch and return to the training field within a single ke, which he thought might have broken some sort of record. Even so, by the time he returned with the pouch, Cangse Sanren and Wen Ruohan were standing side-by-side with identical expressions of smug satisfaction that suggested that they’d accomplished whatever it was that they’d so obviously wanted him out of the way for.

Hopefully not a recruitment into the Wen sect. His brother would kill him.

“Ah, Qiren-gege!” Cangse Sanren said, and accepted the pouch. As if purposefully adding insult to injury, she tied it to her waist without even bothering to pretend to root around inside for the ribbon or whatever thing she had so ‘urgently’ needed from it. “You’re the best.”

“And you’re a pest,” he told her, but she only looked pleased with herself. He wasn’t going to get any answers out of her, and he didn’t even bother to hope for one from Wen Ruohan, who was exactly the same. He looked at him regardless: “Da-ge, are you done here? Even though they haven’t sent word, I’m sure the elders have finished preparing to receive you properly, so you can finally do whatever it is that you came to the Cloud Recesses to do.”

Get out of my way maybe, he meant, and not especially subtly, either.

“Uh, Qiren-gege,” Cangse Sanren said, grinning at him. “I’m pretty sure he’s already doing that.”

Lan Qiren refrained from rolling his eyes at her yet again – nobody would gather up their entire retinue to travel halfway across the cultivation world to see him – and turned expectantly to Wen Ruohan.

“I gave my lieutenants orders to begin negotiations without me,” he said, looking disinterested. “Your sect elders will not want me to disturb them until they have reached preliminary agreement on the main points, so as to avoid losing face for either sect in the event we can’t reach an appropriate resolution.”

Lan Qiren hadn’t thought of that. He supposed it made sense.

Irritating, irritating sense.

“We’ve already seen quite a lot of the Cloud Recesses,” Wen Ruohan added. “Why don’t we take some tea in your rooms?”

Lan Qiren thought about his rooms, which were still in a terrible state, and tensed – he’d neatened up as best as he could after his tantrum in the little time he’d had to himself, but removing all the broken things had left the space bare and uninviting. He wasn’t even sure he even had a matching tea set left.

“You should go down to Caiyi Town,” Cangse Sanren announced. “It has a thriving market full of unique goods, and from what I hear you have a new bride, Sect Leader Wen. If you don’t get her something from your trip, she’ll never forgive you.”

Wen Ruohan hummed thoughtfully, and Lan Qiren seized on the excuse to nod fervently and usher Wen Ruohan towards the gates instead of his rooms.

“I’m sure you’ll be able to find something to her taste,” he told Wen Ruohan, and for some reason remembered how the man’s long-nailed hand, capable of crushing mountains, had so delicately held the bowl Lan Qiren had painted as he had drunk his wedding toasts, as if he’d been afraid of causing the slightest damage to it. “There’s plenty there.”

“I’m sure there is,” Wen Ruohan said, and to Lan Qiren’s relief they were able to spend the next two shichen wandering slowly through the market. Wen Ruohan seemed to be particularly interested in stalls or shops selling household goods, whether vases or inkstones or paperweights, or else in paintings and other decorations; he solicited Lan Qiren’s thoughts on them all, and insisted on hearing them no matter how much Lan Qiren tried to demur.

“I really don’t know how much it’ll help you to know that I personally prefer my décor to have neutral colors with abstract designs,” he said, rubbing his forehead after one particularly extended discussion with a very enthusiastic shop manager in which they, again, did not make any purchase. “I doubt your new bride shares my excessively particular tastes.”

“What makes them excessive, rather than simply a preference?” Wen Ruohan asked, strolling over to where Lan Qiren was standing and running a finger along the blanket Lan Qiren had been absent-mindedly kneading with his hands out of lack of anything better to do. It was made of multilayer silk, airy as a cloud but trapping enough heat to allow for some warmth, and some clever designer had introduced some sort of subtle pattern to the embroidery that made it feel almost fuzzy. Lan Qiren had liked it at once, although regrettably it was the sort of expensive that was beyond the reach of even his generous allowance, especially since he’d so recently depleted it; it would have required him to rely on sect credit to obtain it.

He was technically entitled to do so, especially as one of the main branch family, but it wasn’t worth the snippy comments about Do not wallow in luxury that he’d invariably get for it. When he was younger, his brother had, in a rare moment of sympathy, told him that he’d be able to do much more and allow himself far more freedom while still avoiding such criticism if only he weren’t so insistent on talking about the rules all the time, but at that age Lan Qiren had struggled tremendously with focusing on other subjects and it had seemed easier to simply give up a few privileges. Later, of course, he’d realized that he didn’t have to give up those rights at all – the rule against luxury was intended to forestall dissipation and waste, the prioritizing of self-indulgence over duty, not occasional purchases designed to make life more comfortable – but his austere habits had remained. It was easier to pretend to have a preference towards asceticism and restraint than to admit that he was just being picky again, that he’d rather no blanket than a scratchy one or that loud colors or busy designs hurt his eyes and distracted him from his studies no matter how beautiful the art.

“I don’t suppose you remember those greens they were serving, the first time we met?” Lan Qiren asked dryly. “The ones I didn’t eat? It’s a bit like that.”

“Mm, I recall,” Wen Ruohan said, which surprised Lan Qiren: the other man’s memory must be prodigious to recall such a small event in such a long life. “You cried when you tried to force yourself.”

“It was a physical reaction,” Lan Qiren said through gritted teeth. How did Wen Ruohan always manage to find the most irritating take on any subject? “I gagged, that’s all. Anyway, all I meant was that I’m picky and particular, set in my ways and preferences, and what I like doesn’t necessarily transfer to other people.”

He wanted to ask Are you planning on getting something here already, but that would be crossing the line from blunt to intolerably rude, given that Wen Ruohan was his guest and his elder. Instead, he waited until it seemed like Wen Ruohan was done talking, and then edged pointedly towards the exit in the hope that the older man would get the hint.

In the end, they returned to the Cloud Recesses just in time for dinner, in which Lan Qiren was seated next to Wen Ruohan but which, per Lan sect rules, was silent, and was happily sidelined for most of the discussions that took place afterwards, which were mostly about sect affairs. The next two days Wen Ruohan spent fully ensconced in negotiations with Lan Qiren’s father and brother, and the day after that he was scheduled to leave – he had made plans to visit the Jin sect next before returning to Qishan, a route that ever so coincidentally would make it convenient for him to unofficially swing by Qinghe on his return as well – and in the end they only had time to take tea a few more times, almost always in the company of others.

Lan Qiren breathed a sigh of relief at having managed at least one successful one-on-one interaction with Wen Ruohan that hadn’t blown up in his face. He obtained belated permission for his invitation to the Cold Spring and mentioned to Wen Ruohan that he could take advantage of it during his next visit, whenever that might be – Wen Ruohan had seemed pleased by the offer – and obediently watched the visitors depart before returning, at long last, to his classes.

There were whispers, of course, but he ignored them with the ease of long practice. His sworn brotherhood was unusual, inevitably drawing attention; that would not change, just as it would not change the existence of it, and so other people would simply have to grow bored of their gossip first.

It wasn’t until later, when classes broke for the day, that he finally went back to his rooms.

His rooms, which –

Did not look like his rooms.

Lan Qiren stared.

What should have been bare walls and a cracked table and a bed with a single sheet had been transformed: there were paintings and vases, each with the subtle designs he favored, the latter filled with flowers emitting a cool and subtle scent; the incense burner had been replaced with one of delicate and intricate copperwork, a perfect match to the copper accents that adorned the new table, made of dark wood, that had replaced the one he’d broken. Even the pillows and blanket had been replaced – and he recognized that blanket, expensive and unnecessary, with clever embroidery and multiple layers of silk –

“His taste’s a bit much, I think,” Cangse Sanren said from behind him, having apparently followed him in at some point when he hadn’t noticed. “But I suppose you can’t fault him for efficiency.”

Lan Qiren turned to stare at her. “You – you knew about this?”

She grinned at him.

“You didn’t say – you didn’t tell – !” Lan Qiren looked around. “He was shopping for me?”

“All your fault,” she said cheerfully. “Apparently you were the one who started it all, giving him a gift –”

“He was getting married!”

“Some men are unreasonably competitive, Qiren-gege. Your sworn brother is one of them.”

“I – a competition – ?!”

“Possibly he also felt bad about getting you drunk and taking advantage of you,” she said. “And wanted to make up for it somehow. Just a thought.”

Lan Qiren flapped his hands in the air, unable to form words for a while – not least because he was pretty sure Wen Ruohan didn’t do emotions like felt bad, and probably maxed out at this made you have feelings which are inconvenient for me – and then finally settled on some: “What did the two of you talk about?!”

Cangse Sanren poked at the new guqin stand in the corner, dark wood and copper as well, embedded with a few dimly glowing night-pearls, and nodded to herself in satisfaction at its balance. “Blind people with no judgment or appreciation, mostly.”

“…what?!”

“I may have also mentioned that your room was looking a bit too ascetic recently…”

“Cangse Sanren!”

She laughed her peculiar laugh, the deep one that came from her belly and made everyone around her want to join in, and took to her heels as if afraid that he might chase her. Lan Qiren seriously considered it for a moment, wanting to scold her and also to extract every detail about how she had almost certainly tried to scold one of the most terrifying men currently living, but he found himself drifting over to the bed instead, putting his hands into the comfortable blanket and already imagining how well he would sleep with it tucked tightly around him.

Fine, he thought, scowling down at it with a glare that was for no one’s benefit, not even himself. Maybe next time he writes inviting me, I’ll even go.

#mdzs #lan qiren #cangse sanren #wen ruohan #my fic #my fics #spilled pearls

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diamaker-moon · 4 years ago

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Moving Forward - Chapter 4

Chapter Four

First day and investigations

—————

"Haven't you heard?" She asked back in a cold tone.

"Heard what?"

"You're class... drove Marinette to transfer schools. All because of you guys." She said in an icy tone before passing by him then rest left him in the locker room— gaping.

— previous chapter... —

Adrien was stunned.

'Marinette transferred schools?! When did that happen?!'

He stood there for a few minutes before fishing up his phone and texted Marinette, he waited for a reply, but nothing came. He came back to his classroom in a daze.

He didn't bother sharing the information with anyone, thinking that Lila might steal the spotlight again. And besides, he was too busy thinking why Marinette needed to transfer, and why she didn't inform him— her friend.

Nino was worried for his best bro. Adrien barely spoke throughout the day.

Meanwhile, Marinette was given a few hours in the morning to roam and get acquainted inside campus grounds. She was joined by Allegra, who happily toured her and introduce her as well to every student they pass by.

She was enjoying her time in Jeanne.

But behind all the happiness she was feeling at the moment, there's a huge responsibility whispering in her ear. The Cat Miraculous is currently in camouflage mode in her right ring finger as a rose gold ring. She needed to find either a new permanent cat holder or a temporary one. Part of her wants to trust her dormmates. She couldn't trust her temporary heroes anymore, aside from Viperion and Ryuko.

She could imagine Allan using the Turtle miraculous since he is already protective of his friends. She was stuck between Claude and Allegra for the Fox miraculous.

Claude is a theatre kid, he can imagine a lot of things and that can help during battles but he's more of a fighter than hiding in the shadows. Allegra, however, can do the opposite.

But for now, her main priority is to find a cat holder, even if it has to be temporary. It was a good thing that she had bought a mini fridge for Plagg's camembert stash and stored it in her room or else her dormmates might think she's a cheese hoarder!

All the teachers and students in Jeanne were very welcoming. Her classmates were friendly to her, and her teachers are fair educators. When there is a disturbance in the class, they reprimand both students not only one, and Marinette noticed that there's no 'model student' treatment like the one she had in Dupont.

It was lunchtime, she and her dormmates decided to eat in a nearby restaurant. She missed how she just goes home and eats lunch in her home then sometimes returns with a bag of pastries as snacks. She missed her home and her parents' bakery.

Marinette and Allegra were busy chatting about Marinette's current state in Jeanne, while Claude and Allan are busy bickerings on who will win if Batman and Iron Man fought.

Félix just observed them, and from time to time read on his book.

None of them saw a blonde looking at them with a melancholic look. The blonde smiled bitterly before they left the restaurant.

"Are you all done? Lunchtime is almost up." Félix announced.

The other four nodded and paid for their meal, then walked back to school.

Marinette wants to thank her luck and Tikki, for not having any Akuma throughout the rest of the afternoon.

Upon returning to the dorm, she went inside her bathroom and stared at the mirror. She was looking at her reflection, but somehow it felt unfamiliar to her.

The girl in the mirror, has her hair down, wearing a white button-up shirt underneath a black blazer that had red accents and trimming, the school crest sewed on top of the front pocket and a red tie. Paired with it is a plaid red, white and black skirt that reaches up to her mid-thighs, she also wore black knee-high socks and strapped two-inched heels.

She moved her hair on the right side a bit and saw her signature black stud earrings which are actually the camouflaged ladybug's miraculous earrings, then the rose gold cat miraculous on her right hand that moved her hair.

It was a huge change.

She was used to seeing her previous look since Dupont doesn't require school uniforms but Jeanne does.

Marinette sighed then stripped out of her uniform to take a short shower.

Once she came out of the bathroom, she was wearing light pink high-waisted shorts, a white halter-top with her signature flower design, then a sheer black cardigan.

She turned the soundproofing on then locked her bedroom door before she let the kwamis out of the miracle box.

"Did you have fun on your first day, Marinette?" Tikki asked.

Marinette hummed before answering. "Yeah. It was quite strange to see all the students wear the same outfit, but everyone was very welcoming. Quite different in Dupont. And there were no Akuma attacks today!"

Tikki smiled at her holder. The kwami thought that the girl deserves it. She needed a new environment away from the previous one since it was toxic.

Marinette was skimming through the Grimoire, and the kwamis knew not to be close enough since it is prohibited to know about the knowledge inside the book.

Shadowmoth. A unified Butterfly and Peacock miraculous holder.

Hawkmoth was becoming stronger, and Marinette needed to be ten steps ahead of him. She cannot use her previous temporary heroes.

Rena Rouge, Carapace, Pegasus and Roi Singe betrayed her in their civilian lives, unknowingly. She cannot trust them in battle, even if they were efficient heroes.

She was alone at the moment. No temporary allies, and no partner.

But she might have a lead on who Hawk—Shadowmoth is.

She looked at her bulletin board that is hanged on the wall.

If anyone ever saw the board, they might think she is a detective, due to having a map of Paris wide opened, with marks, sticky notes, red strings, etc.

She closed the book before putting on a sleeve cover for the book then plainly placed it on her desk together with a stack of books.

"Marinette?"

She hummed before looking at her left seeing the kwamis stare at her.

"We finally might have a lead on who Hawk—Shadowmoth is. Why does he need to change his name? The hawkmoth is already a stupid name, but he had to change it to Shadowmoth! Ugh!"

The kwamis laughed at their guardian's frustrations.

"Who do you suspect, Master?" Wayzz asked.

"Plagg, do you know where your previous holder got the book and tablet?" She asked the cat kwami who's busy eating a wheel of Camembert on top of her chaise.

Plagg looked to her before swallowing the rest of the whole wheel then answered.

"In his deadbeat of a father's office. That's where we found the book first, inside a safe behind her mother's painting."

Marinette hummed.

She had valid points at the moment to suspect him. And no one can prevent her from suspecting the fashion guru like before when she had Chat Noir as her partner. He was adamant that the guru isn't Hawkmoth, but now she understood. The man was his father. If the fashion guru is Hawkmoth, he'll be losing both his Mother and Father.

Something clicked in her mind. The alternate reality that she prevented: Chat Blanc.

She gasped. Then hurriedly grabbed her notebook that has all her points and suspect list with a list of reasons. She flipped the pages towards Gabriel Agreste's page.

Possible Suspect: Gabriel Agreste

Affliation: Fashion Designer

Relationships:

◈ Emilie Agreste (Wife)

◈ Adrien Agreste (Son)

◈ Nathalie Sancoeur (Assistant)

Reasons why suspected?

- Mme Agreste has been gone for three years, can use the ultimate power to wish her back.

- Secluded from the outside world.

- Assitant is very devoted, can possibly be the ally— Mayura.

- Another possible ally— Lila Rossi. Got akumatized after leaving from the first bathroom confrontation looking all smug, and has been akumatized repeatedly. Also might be involved with the Heroe's day illusion of Dark 'Ladybug'.

- Akumatized when suspected before. Hypothesis: possibly to divert attention?

- Very attentive and tried to reach for earrings and ring before during 'The Collector' after getting de-akumatized...

- Briefly saw an intrigue look on his face when he saw Chloé open a miraculous box in public.

- Has the Grimoire. Now, he also had Master Fu's tablet (stolen possibly during Miracle Queen battle)

-Theory: Chat Blanc said that Hawkmoth was a reason why the alternate timeline was destroyed by Blanc, Marinette is almost akumatized before (in original timeline), is it possible that in that timeline, Hawkmoth tried to akumatize Marinette then accidentally finds out Chat Noir's identity, leading up to a possible confrontation? It is quite hard to choose between a family relative and a relationship...

Marinette observed the page. If she was impulsive, she'd probably march up to the Agreste Mansion, but if her possible suspect is truly a villain, she cannot impulsively attack since he had two miraculouses that can create an Akuma and a Sentimonster.

She was a tactician. She always thinks about how she can use her lucky charm, and mostly in the most complex ways on how to use it.

The only thing she can do for a while is observing the Older Agreste.

"It's decided then," She looked at the kwamis then continued her sentence.

"We're going on a stake-out outside the Agreste Mansion, and possibly the inside as well. But that mansion is heavily guarded with cameras! How am I going to enter it?!"

She annoyingly said the huffed.

"Kwamis can help with the cameras and if there are alarms!" Trixx reasoned.

"Hmm... That can be useful... But how am I going to get an inside look? If there's a hidden safe behind Mme Agreste's painting in M. Agreste's atelier, I need an entrance."

Plagg thought about it before gasping.

"I can look around! I've been in the mansion for a long time, I can search around that room to see any open windows or entrance!"

Marinette actually smiled at that statement, she scratches Plagg behind one of his ears which made the cat kwami purr in happiness.

"Looks like someone earned a prize!"

The kwamis laughed in seeing the stubborn cat kwami happily purring due to the young guardian scratching him. Marinette needed a thorough plan. A plan to look around M. Agreste's atelier without being detected. And if she is lucky maybe retrieve one of the missing miraculous.

—————

"Nathalie!"

The woman flinched before she composed herself and made her way towards her boss's atelier with a tablet in one hand.

"Yes, M. Agreste?"

The man was seething, and she didn't know why. The last time she saw him like this was when they caught Adrien taking the miraculous book to school.

"Where's the Grimoire and the tablet?"

Nathalie blinked. "It's in your hands Monsier. Or maybe safely hidden in the safe."

Gabriel sighed deeply. "The book and the tablet is missing. I check the cameras, Adrien got it again, but when I asked for it back, he said you had it."

"I'm sorry, M. Agreste, but I didn't even know that it was in Adrien's possessions. I'll look around the mansion, maybe Adrien misplaced it, I'll also ask him to remember where he left it."

Gabriel nodded and dismissed her.

Inside Nathalie's head, it was trouble. They were fortunate to steal the previous Guardian's tablet that has a translated version of the book, to fix the Peacock miraculous. They had also found a translated pages about the power-ups but we haven't figure out what it actually means. They also don't have a backup copy of the translated pages!

"Adrien? Adrien."

Nathalie knocked on the younger Agreste's door. She heard a faint 'wait, Nathalie!'. Soon the door opened and revealed a dishevelled Adrien who was currently drying his hair with a towel.

"Yes, Nathalie?"

"I heard from your Father that you had the book and tablet he's looking for. Do you remember where you left it?" She said and noticed how Adrien paled.

"I was only looking at it, I left it on my desk but the next morning it was gone. I figured that you might've found it on the desk and took it back to Father... That's the only place I left it before going to bed."

She observes the young boy and hummed. She instructed Adrien to try and look around thinking that it might've been misplaced.

'I have a bad feeling about this. It's already bad that it's missing, but if my theory is right that it is in Ladybug's possession, we might be at a disadvantage.'

Chapter 3 — Moving Forward: Masterlist — Chapter 5

#miraculousladybug #marinette dupain-cheng #movingforward #adrien agreste #class salt

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stray-kids-react · 4 years ago

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Doing WAP dance perfectly

(If you don't know what WAP is. It's a suggestive dance with a lot of twerking and grinding.)

Masterlist

...

Bang Chan

° Chan always called you cute, you would try your hardest to be hot... But he'd still see you as an adorable lil bean. You became worried that he didn't see you in a sexual way at all, and decided to see if you could possibly get him flustered by doing such a dirty dance.

° You wore the sexiest outfit in your closet, leaving barely anything to the imagination. You walked into Chan's studio with a large trench coat hiding the treat you had in store for your boyfriend. Noticing Chan was alone, you decided to let the coat drop to your feet.

° Blush crept onto his cheeks, bottom lip bittne by his teeth. It was making a mark on him, until you started the music. That song was too much of a meme to be sexy to him, especially since Felix tried to attempt it in front of him once and gave up half way.

° Even if you looked extremely sexy while pounding into the ground, he couldn't help but giggle by the choice of song. If it were something more sensual and romantic, than he would be on the ground with you. But WAP turned him off quite a bit.

"Chan! I wanted to be sexy... Am I not hot?"

"Of course you are hot, it's just the song."

Lee Know

° Minho is a tease who loves you very much, but is not a fan of that trend. He can't help but cringe when he sees someone do it in public for everyone to see, he doesn't know why but it just effects him a lot in all of the wrong ways. But you didn't know this.

° While he alone in the dance practice room, you walked in with WAP blaring from your phone. You then put it on the bench and began to dance along with it perfectly, the phone was recording everything. Including Minho's uncomfortable expression.

° He was impressed by your hips, but the whole song and trend gave him terrible flashbacks to the tiktok he witnessed before. Even if he wanted to smile, it came off very fake or turned into some mixture of cringe and fake happiness.

° Minho did not want to hurt your feelings, but he truly couldn't help it when you did the WAP dance. You thought he was teasing you and trying to annoy you, and you continue to think that til this day. But he was truly not impressed by that trend that you did.

"I know you secretly loved it, don't deny it."

"Oh trust me, I won't deny anything."

Changbin

° You were trying so hard to learn this dance, you wanted to do it for yourself and to also impress your boyfriend. Even when you failed miserabley, Changbin still sent hearts of encouragement and asked if you could give him another show of it.

° He would be lying if he denied that he didn't get a tiny bit turned on when you pounded into the ground, but he didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable so he didn't tell you unless you noticed or asked him about it. Which you did a couple of times.

° Wonders how your body can move so smoothly while doing such harsh and sexual moves, especially when it comes to the twerking. You challenged Changbin to twerk with you, and you weren't surprised when he was actually pretty good at it.

° Will record the challenge, helping you edit it and re recording it if you don't like the final product. Changbin is supportive of your interests and even if he isn't overly into WAP, he finds anything you do breathtaking. And think your better than Cardi B herself.

"I swear you are better than Cardi B babe."

"Stop buttering me up lover boy."

Hyunjin

° Truly conflicted. He is impressed by your dance skills, but also doesn't want your followers to see you dancing so proactively. He wants to be the only one to see you acting this way, but he also finds it a bit amusing on how serious you seem.

° Your dancing to a song called 'Wet Ass Pussy' and yet your face seems like your doing an interview at the job of your dreams. This will calm his nerves a tiny bit, knowing you aren't doing this to get attention. But rather because you're bored and wanted to.

° Will sometimes hum along to the song while it's playing, getting shy if he reads out the dirty lyrics about sex. Even though it has become more of a meme than a sensual getting it on song, it still makes him flustered because of how raunchy it is.

° Claps when you've finally succeeded the dance, smiling proudly since he saw how hard you worked for a non benefitial trend. Once you posted the challenge, he would like and save it immediately. Secretly watching it while he goes on tour.

"Does it hurt when you hump the ground?"

"You get used to it after a while."

Han

° Knew that you were going to want to do it, you like to try out different trends to see if you like them or not. He just wasn't expecting to see you do WAP so closely, he thought he'd scroll through tik tok and then you'd be twerking on his feed.

° He was scrolling through Instagram when you got up and began to do the dance, he was trying to comprehend what was going on since you did so out of the blue. Became your personal cheerleader when you went into the splits, hyping you up quite a bit.

° Won't see it as a sensual dance, is more impressed than turned on. He'll high five you afterwards, and then 'high fives' your toosh for doing most of the work. You will become flustered with his compliments, giggling as he drums your bottom teasingly.

° Goes through your social media accounts later, to make sure there aren't any pervs commenting degrading things. If he sees any he'll report them, knowing he is the only one to say things such as 'that's some fine peice of ass' to you.

"Baby, are you scrolling my comments?"

"mhm, there are some creepy followers."

Felix

° Tik tok master, already knows all of the moves and probably taught you them. Felix likes to boost your confidence up and become your own personal happiness, even if you thought you looked cringey and horrid in the video, he'd tell you the opposite.

° Won't force you to do it in front of people or even post the video, even though you look amazing he still doesn't mind if keeping it private. Is a protective sunshine who would feel a bit of relief if you didn't post it, but would never ever admit that to you.

° When you were your best friend was visiting, you both decided to attempt the popular trend. She stopped half way through do to laughter, while you kept going. Felix rushed to you from the kitchen, beginning to throw money on you to enhance the laughter.

° If you get embarrassed when dialing one of the many attempts, he'll comfort you and shower you with kisses til you feel better. Over all he is a sweetheart who cherishes your happiness, and he'll do anything to hear your beautiful laugh and see your smile.

"Don't be shy love *kiss* you were great. *kiss*."

"The kisses make me more shy Felix."

Seungmin

° Knew you were on tik tok, and witnessed you attempt a couple of trends, mosy dance challenges. But never expected you to do WAP, you both were generally introverted and were much more soft with each other in public rather than all over each other.

° Even in photos of you two together, the most anyone will see is hand holding. That's why many people were surprised to see you doing such a bold and raunchy dance for many people to see, the reason behind it was a dare from your close friend.

° A staff member showed him the video, giggling as they couldn't beleive what you did. Seungmin smiled, seeing you so confident and bold made him feel proud. He wasn't upset or jealous in the slightest, he was extactic to see you be so confident.

° When he arrived home, you asked him about his opinion on the video. He could tell you didn't like it and were self conscious about it. So instead o replying at first, he embraced you in a gentle hug. Rubbing your shoulder blades as he complimented you.

"You looked stunning in the video."

"A-are you sure? Don't lie to me Seungmin."

Jeongin

° Stray kids knew you for as long as they knew Jeongin, you were his best friend turned lover and they saw you as family. That is why it made it 10x more awkward for both you and Jeongin when Felix noticed your newest post on tik tok.

° You thought you saved it privately, and did NOT want it to be public due to having such an open account with many followers. Your family even followed your account, so this made you nearly pass out knowing many people have already seen this video.

° You immediately deleted the video, even though it was far too late. Jeongin was a bit shy from witnessing you do such a raunchy dance, but he wanted to comfort you nonetheless. His ears were bright pink as you clung onto him, trying to calm down.

° A couple days after the incident, Minho and Han would tease you lightly. Jeongin occasionally joined in, unless he noticed you became very flustered and would then put a stop to the teasing. He still found it adorable how embarrassed you were of the video.

"What if my mom saw this!?"

"... What if she didn't. There is a chance."

#stray kids #kpop #skz scenarios #stray kids reactions #changbin #han jisung #hyunjin #jeongin #lee know #bang chan #felix skz #skz seungmin #skz requests #skz reactions #wapchallenge

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