#also in typical me fashion: i was like 'oh this will be a super short little story!' and it's fucking 17k words lmaoo

[cranberry-writes]

hey!! can i pls rq for more hughie x reader content?? there isn't much on here and i think we need to fix that

Occupation

Hughie x Reader

Genre; Mild angst but it’s all good at the end

Warnings; Cannon typical violence, language, talk of killing and mild spoilers for the first episode

This is a build from my Dating the Boys head-cannons, at the end of Hughies section i mention that reader would find out about his ‘job’ like two days after asking and getting nothing as a response. Also the scenario I used i completely made up, please bear with me i’m only partly on season 2. 

Uhhhhhggg i may have lightly chopped the ending up ill fix it later

also yeeesssss a request! i love requests!!!!

Synopsis; A few days after asking your boyfriend what he does for work and getting nothing for an answer, you accidentally find out his occupation in a way neither of you wanted.

You’re not sure what compelled you to ask Hughie what he did for work, maybe it was the strange hours he worked, or the fact he got hurt regularly, maybe it was but just good old fashioned curiosity that led you to asking him.

“So what do you do for work babe?”

The way he froze should have been enough of a sign that something was wrong, that you should have pushed him harder or asked more questions. But you didn’t, you just thought it was humorous in the moment.

His demeanor changed quickly, relaxed and focused on his phone to anxiously trying to look anywhere besides you. “I- well, I’m a tech guy? Like I don’t work for a tech company but I’m the tech guy, I work on tech stuff, it’s super boring you don’t want to hear about it.” He ended the rambling explanation with a forced chuckle

“So what do you want to do about dinner? We could go to that new Korean restaurant.” Glancing over to the clock you saw it was only 4, but decided to just play along. He didn’t have to tell you if he didn’t want to, you were sure there was a good reason, maybe he did something like a male striper and was embarrassed.

4 days later and a male striper would have been a dream scenario compared to this.

—

You didn’t mean to see him, or the rest of them. You were just running some errands and wanted to make a stop at a new store, taking a short cut through an older part of town that you were sure was abandoned.

You turned the corner and saw him, it took you a moment to recognize him because he was completely drenched in blood. You’re mind forced you into panic mode, you looked at the people he was with, none where familiar except for a taller gruff looking man. Wasn’t he the guy that was on the news for killing Stillwell?

You moved back to hide behind the corner you just turned, suddenly very aware of how loud your breath was and how heavy the bags in your hands were. Slowly placing them on the ground and moving your hands to cover your mouth, you stayed as still as you could. You could hear them moving and talking from around the corner as thousand thoughts running through your head.

‘Is this his job? Does he kill people?’

‘Oh god, if he gets caught could i get in trouble??’

Then finally, the loudest thought drained the rest of them out

‘wasn’t Homelander, the Homelander after that Butcher guy?’

That thought managed to turn into cement inside your head, what if Homelander was after Hughie too?

“Oh shit.”

The words, while still quiet, left your mouth faster than you could stop them. You stoped your breathing as you heard Hughie and the others stop talking, after a moment you could hear a pair of foot steps approaching where you hid. 

Before you could run or scream or anything, a pair a rough hands where holding you against the wall, you grabbed and scratched at them desperately. “Please! I won’t tell anyone! I promise!”

Your luck must have completely failed you because Butcher was the one currently strangling you, the one convicted of murdering a single mother, was trying to kill you.

Somehow through the fog of being suffocated and also begging for your life, you could hear your name before being dropped to the dirty concrete floor. Your palms getting scraped harshly against the ground wasn’t even something you registered, you where to busy desperately trying to regain your breath, breathing hard and gasping for any bit of air.

You looked up, seeing Hughie and the asshole who just tried to kill you arguing. You would have been surprised with him arguing with a murderer so passionately, but it had hardly passed your mind at the time. You did manage to notice the other people there, a shorter man with a buzz cut facial hair combo and an asian woman with the prettiest hair you’d seen where staring at you.

You stood up slowly after a moment, looking back at Hughie who had since stoped arguing. “Is this, your job? You work with a murderer?” You gesture vaguely to Butcher, before redirecting your attention back to him.

He looked down, giving you a good view of his now blood red hair. “..I wanted to tell you, I just didn’t know how. I’m sorry.” “I don’t think anyone wants their boyfriend to tell them that their work involves them getting covered in blood.” Hughie looked down at his clothes as if he hadn’t noticed before.

It took a minute for you to properly regain your self, taking in your surroundings fully, the people around you, the situation.

“Are you even safe? Doing, whatever this is?” He tilted his head up at you, gradually shaking it side to side. “Not always.”

You probably hated asking that question the most, and his answer (while completely expected) scared you. Having a partner who was doing something stupid was something, having one doing something stupid and dangerous was another.

“You won’t die doing this, okay? Tell me, you won’t die.” The words were choppy and tense as you spoke, it probably sounded more of a decree than a request or question, but in reality it was a plea.

“I won’t die doing this.” He took a slight step forward, reaching a hand out in offering. Instead you grabbed him and pulled him into a hug that he reciprocated quickly. The partly dried blood on his clothes made it mildly uncomfortable but you powered through it, desperate for any comfort.

You stayed like that for a moment, savoring the moment. You pulled back and looked at him, making sure to hold his arms tightly. “We will not be talking about this at home, or ever unless your life is in danger. Please.”

Hughie smiled, and you felt calmer. He moved closer and kissed you on the cheek before stepping back “Not a peep, not a single peep.”

[threewaysdivided]

Hobson Heckled into Historical Haute-Couture

Continuing the Dan Jones & Dragons gala parade with Hobson, the Flower Crowns' oft-harried Halfling Warlock (played by the ever-wholesome Dan Floyd). Is he trying to massage away the realisation that letting his literally-half-brained patron choose his gala attire might have been a mistake? Is Valse giving him a headache over something else entirely? Did he use Detect Magic in a room full of powerful items and accidentally flash-bang himself? Yes.

More Flower Crowns Gala Outfits: Morenthal | Gelnek

As always, design talk under the cut:

But before that, a short story: I've been following Dan's content on Youtube for... oh jeez, that sure is almost a decade now, both on his current New Frame Plus/Playframe channels and back when he was the primary founder and narrator for EC. His old games education videos helped me get one of my earliest jobs in project work and introduced me to a bunch of media production concepts (like scope management) that would go on to inform some of my own storytelling analysis posts. It was a startling little moment of artistic ouroboros to realise I was mentally running through key points from Dan's own Pose Design 101 video as I was drawing his DnD character. Never expected things to come full-circle like that, but if you're seeing this, Dan: here's to you 🫡 If you're not Dan and haven't already, do go check out his stuff - it's all super well-produced, informative, funny and he's just an overall stand-up guy.

Now: onto the tiny little nerd and his passé party attire

This was a really fun costuming challenge, with a bunch of interesting curveballs thrown in the mix. Unlike the rest of the Flower Crowns, Hobson didn't choose his own party outfit: it was picked out by his patron after Valse kibbitzed him into giving up and letting a heroism-obsessed Fey call the shots. Dan cited Valse as having the fashion sense of Stede Bonnet-as-depicted-in-OFMD, briefing a vaguely 19th century-style outfit that had frilled sleeves and 'would have looked gaudy even when it was in fashion a century earlier'.

Actually dating his outfit was the first challenge. D&D settings are kind of an anachronistic uchronia, with classic swords-and-sorcery fantasy campaigns potentially pulling inspiration points from anywhere across the Arthurian era up to pre-war modernity. Which leads to the question: how do you make something seem dated in a setting where most everything looks vaguely ye-olde-fantasy? The other challenge was that, IRL, the 19th century (i.e Victorian era) was when menswear started taking on a lot of the shapes that would eventually become modern suit and top-'n'-tails fashion. Since Trilby was already going to be wearing classic top-'n'-tails formalwear, I decided to set Hobson's style earlier in the 1800s-1820s and pull in some 18th century Stede Bonnet flourishes to visually set them apart. This article provided some great reference images, and once I hit on the figured silk waistcoat I knew I had a potential starting point.

Colour-wise, I stuck with the burgundy-and-gold palette the Dans gave Hobson in his official gala stream art, since those looked good together and matched up with Dan J's tendency to draw Hobson wearing greens/earth-tones and Valse in reds/jewel-tones. The combination is a lot more colourful and richly saturated than is typical for this style of Victorian-adjacent clothes, which felt appropriate for Valse's gaudy tastes.

Fabric-wise, I figured a fun way to gaudy things up even further would be to lean into the silks and satins that were fashionable at the time, but make all of his outfit shimmery rather than just a single feature piece. As a bonus, silk and satin clothes tend be hot, inelastic and have horribly itchy seams if worn unlined, which felt like exactly the kind of thing Valse's all-form-no-function sensibilities would inflict upon the small, long-suffering fellow. Both these fabrics also have a habit of behaving hideously and ripping themselves apart when worn wet, which makes this a great outfit to, say, accidentally fight an Aboleth in. Poor Hobson.

Some other details, just for fun: 1. Hobson's sketch layers include a drawing of his un-removable cursed left bracer. He's pulled the frilly, puffy sleeve over it but you might spot hints of the shape and the gem if you squint. 2. The reference waistcoat I used had floral embroidery on it. Had this actually been a Hobson outfit, I would have converted them to his garland flower (Forget-Me-Nots), but since it was a Valse pick I decided to make them Senaliesse chrysanthemums; a flower given out to friends of the Feywild's Summer Court as a sign of protection and favour. (It also adds extra layers to Pocket mistaking Hobson for a denizen of the Fey, which is fun).

Close crop on the details because I'm very happy with how they turned out:

[ai-doesnt-live-very-long]

Yandere CYOA (Unfinished)

This is not a completed anything. I realized it was too big for me, so I quit. That was many years ago.

You (Yin Easton, they/them) - You took your mother’s deal in order to pay for your father’s surgery. You can Alt + F4 out of any situation, so you’re safe. And these yanderes are all platonic. Long, golden blond hair in a bottom starting ponytail that reaches your back blades. Light brown eyes. 

Dad (Andre Easton, he/him) - Your father. He told you never to go to your mother. But he has a tumor and needs surgery. He’s in the hospital. You can’t lose him.

Mom (Naomi, she/her) - She is a crazy witch. She’s been trying to be a part of your life, but your father always pushes her away. She offers a deal, and makes all the yanderes platonic.

Dani (they/them) - One of the yanderes. They’re mean to everyone. Super long, dark brown hair, in two top starting ponytails that reaches their waist. You’re pretty sure it’s cosplay or a wig. Medium blue eyes.

Ethan (he/him) - One of the yanderes. He’s shy and quiet. Short length. Pure black. Dark green. Short, black hair in a typical boy fashion. Dark green eyes, and thick black rectangle glasses.

Rianna (she/her) - One of the yanderes. She’s enthusiastic and bubbly. Curly light red hair that reaches her shoulders. Gray eyes that seem to shift between all the shades of gray. Freckles.

Prologue

You’re an idiot. Your father always told you never to go to your mother. But you needed the money. She wanted you to do something for her. Then she’d give you what you needed.

Main Route

It’s just one day. You tell yourself as you step into the room. Just one. Then you can pay for his surgery, and he’ll be alright. 

You see someone walking up to you. A girl with curly light red hair that reaches her shoulders., gray eyes that seem to shift between all the shades of gray, and freckles.

“Hello?” You ask.

“Hey! You must be new! You’re here to set up for the birthday party! The company told me that they had hired some extra help! Welcome to the team!” The girl greets you enthusiastically. They’re decorating for a birthday party as part of a party planning company. You’re all alone out here. No witnesses. Stay calm. You tell yourself. It’s not long. And you can Alt + F4 if things get too intense. 

“Hey.” You respond. “Yeah, I’m Yin.”

“Well hi Yin! I’m Rianna, and this is Ethan and Dani. Say hi, guys!” Rianna says. You look at your other obstacles colleagues. 

“Hi.” says Ethan shyly. He has short, black hair styled in a typical boy fashion. He also has dark green eyes, and thick black rectangle glasses.

“Ugh, great. Who the hell is this?! We don’t need any more help!” Snaps Dani. You look at them. They have super long, dark brown hair, in two top starting ponytails that reach their waist. You’re pretty sure it’s cosplay or a wig. Medium blue eyes. 

“Aw, don’t be rude, Dani~!” Rianna chides. Oh boy. This is going to suck. “We can always use more help!” The two stare each other down. Dani glares at Rianna, and Rianna stares back passive aggressively. 

“Um, maybe we can ask them to help settle our dispute?” Ethan asks.

“Sorry.” You interrupt. “Before we….do this, I just gotta know. You guys ARE actors, right? Like, you don’t actually think like this?” 

All three of them stare at you, annoyed. “Man, you’re lucky you’re Naomi’s kid.” Dani sighs.

“We only are allowed to break character ONCE because of that, so listen up. We are actors. However, we never break character for any circumstances. We, or you, could be seriously injured, and we just roll with it. We also might try to kill you, but your little trick should keep you safe. Yeah, we know about that.” Rianna says.

“So don’t expect us to break character again. Or even go easy on you, if it’s out of character. But no, we are not ‘experiments’ or ‘in danger’. We consent to acting like this, and we can stop at anytime. Got it? Good. Now, let’s get back into it.” Ethan finishes. Then, just like that, all of them get back into the expressions they were wearing just a minute ago. They adjust their posture and even the way they stand and talk. Dang. They’re good. 

“So, um, do you think you can help us with our dispute?” Ethan asks. Rianna and Dani turn to you eagerly. 

“Uh….what dispute?” You ask cautiously.

“About the party theme!” Exclaims Rianna. 

“Wait, don’t the people hosting the party decide that?”

“They left it up to us. For some reason. And these idiots don’t understand my vision.” Dani scowls.

“Your vision is stupid!” Rianna rolls her eyes. “My idea is the best.”

“Um, I like….” Ethan starts. Rianna and Dani stare at him, and he shrinks down. “Uh….” I have to settle their dispute, I guess? You think. And that…like, effects who’s going to go yandere for me? Okay then… “Sure, I’ll settle your dispute. What are the different themes?”

All three brighten up. 

“First, who’s the party for? Like, do we know anything about them?”

All three stare blankly. Wait, did you outsmart them? Did you outthink your mother? A subtle smile creeps on your lips. Dani glares.

“Hey, what are you smirking at?!” 

“Nothing!” You respond quickly. Don’t want to make a yandere angry. Can’t believe you just thought that. Never thought you’d actually care about that in real life. God, you hate this. 

[infjinthecity]

Zhang Yixing: Grandline4, Shanghai (August 2024)

Four very short days after I arrived in China, I left Hangzhou where I’m living and got on a bullet train to Shanghai. Thinking back, it was insane of me to do this. There was so much I had to organize before I started work, but this was an opportunity of a lifetime. I had been trying to get tickets to Grandline 4 quite literally anywhere in the world, but none of the dates worked with my moving schedule. I felt like the only Beiker on planet earth that was going to miss this concert series. Then, a couple of weeks before my departure from Australia, in a very China-esque fashion, but especially typical of his studio, they dropped dates and ticket sales for Shanghai. It was his last stop on the Grandline tour for 2024, so it was going to be like the Hunger Games trying to get tickets.

Fortunately, I have an army of awesome women around me in this fandom and with their help, I was able to secure tickets for BOTH Shanghai dates. I was also fortunate enough to see him when he headlined Metamoon in New York City while I was living there but he was only on stage for 45 minutes, and it wasn’t his show. Besides, everyone knows Zhang Yixing in China is superior so I was simply dying to see him on his home turf.

And oh my god, he did not disappoint.

I joined the fandom after finding him on Street Dance of China Season 3. I showed up for Yibo but left with an obsession for the introverted Krump King of China. I fell in the Yixing hole back then and I have no desire to climb out – haha! But when I joined the fandom back then, and actually since then as well, it seemed that Yixing was moving through the world with an unhealthy amount of melancholy. Maybe it’s just me, but for so long all he was talking about was how lonely he was, his age, and his fears about his unrealized dreams. Now I understand that right after I joined his fandom COVID hit and many people around the world fell into a massive slump, but it was more than that with him. It seeped into every live stream he did, every interview, and his song lyrics became about these feelings, and it painted his face for a few years.

Well, after being in Shanghai, I think the collective agreement among fans is, that version of Zhang Yixing seems gone. His body is super healthy, and it’s obvious he’s done work on his mental health and the way in which he looks at the world in front of him. He radiates joy and happiness, and it is an absolute blessing to witness. It was unexpected, but his happiness and his contentedness eminates off of him. His smile is full and genuine. It was, hands down, my favourite part of both dates. I am so thankful I got to see him like that and I really hope that whatever he’s doing, he continues to do more of it!

I made it all the way through night one and almost all the way through night two before the tears started. He closed the second night with Breathe and if you follow me on other socials you will know I’ve been screaming about this song since he dropped it. It speaks to my heart and soul right now and I feel like he wrote it about me. Isn’t it funny how music can touch us like that? Anyway, the opening beats of Breathe started and I couldn’t hold my tears in. The Chinese auntie next to me chuckled at me, but it’s fine!

I really hope I get the chance to see him in China again. Shanghai was the last stop for 2024 as he’s focusing more on his stage and screen performances for now but music is his life so I’m sure there will inevitably be more shows next year.

A quick shoutout to his studio. I know as a fandom we tend to collectively and loudly shit all over the incompetence of his staff, but they really came through for me and my friend on night one. We were sitting in different sections (like everyone in China does) and she was much further away from the stage than me. We asked security if my friend could come through to my section and take some close up photos, but they weren’t having it. Someone from Yixing’s staff saw the exchange, clocked that we were both foreigners, and came to our rescue. He made a call and escorted us down to the barrier for photo ops. It was so nice of them, and it made our night – especially for my friend who wouldn’t have had the chance for such photos otherwise. So we’re on a no-ragging-on-studio kick – FOR NOW!

If you ever get the chance to see this wonderful soul in the flesh, don’t hesitate. He is worth every single dollar I spent on tickets – and I spent a loooottttttt.

I love him I love him I love him I love him. Probably not a normal amount, but that’s okay.

I have lots of videos from both nights but Tumblr only lets you upload one video per post so I'm dropping the video in question that brought on all the tears.

Till next time, peace!

[gleamintomurk]

Woo time for a rant about Sidus and her nasty ass monster friend because I accidentally got @daydreamhuntress invested (I apologize if you didn't want to be pinged I can remove it if you want)

So I've posted about this before and even wrote a short story about it but I'm constantly changing my mind about things and that was not my best writing so here we go

Soooooo for those of you just tuning in, Sidus and her friends have known from a very young age that sooner or later they were gonna have to fuck off into a hell portal for an "adventure" and probably die. Such is fate. This is what got them in touch with each other in the first place.

Anyway, sparing all the sparkly descriptive language, right about the time that Sidus was born a giant incredibly powerful godlike monster took up residence in the forest near her town. It sort of melded with the forest and managed to escape detection for a few years, which is really fucking impressive considering that said town near the forest subsists almost entirely on gathering and small-game hunting. This is what they do. It's their thing.

Until, of course, in typical fantasy hero fashion, little Sidus wanders a little too far from home and the creature basically goes "oh shit this kid's fate is linked to mine" (because again, godlike, it knows these things) and convinces probably-5ish year old Sidus that it's a benevolent woodland deity and she's its destined prophet and yeah, okay, what 5 year old is going to question authority enough to say no to god? Especially in a society where fate is a huge thing people really strongly believe in.

So time passes with this thing taking Sidus under its wing and telling her that she can't tell anybody, which definitely doesn't raise any red flags, right?

And her quote unquote "training" gets increasingly more brutal as the years go on, often involving a really excessive amount of bloodshed, both from animals and her own injuries

Until she's like 10 and the creature goes "okay good job now go attack those hunters they won't even know it's you" and Sidus reasonable is very hesitant and is like "I don't wanna hurt people what's wrong with you" and it's just "yeah okay I'm powerful enough now that I can just make you, and the damage is going to be way worse because of it"

Naturally, this massively affects their dynamic because the creature can now tell Sidus to do literally anything and Sidus either has to deal with it, which she does 90% of the time out of fear, or get basically possessed and forced to do it anyway, usually with much more damage dealt.

Fast forward another 5 years, Sidus is 15 and about to go into the hell portal to who fucking knows, and is very excited about it because it means she doesn't have to deal with this shit anymore. She's become a very bitter and angry person.

Also, side note, it's a big thing where she lives to be proud of your battle scars and the stories that come with them, and to show them off, and she fucking can't because no one can know what she's doing and also she's ashamed of all the harm she's done. Which, y'know, really fucking isolating.

What's also isolating is the fact that she also just straight up doesn't believe in fate anymore (the Eridan parallels again fjejfjdj), which is super not normal throughout her entire society & isolates her from her friends as much as it does the people around her.

Anyway she's getting ready to leave all this shit behind when the creature is basically just like "hey I need you to kill an entire fucking village for me and then I'll never ask you for anything again 👍"

And obviously Sidus goes NO what the FUCK and tries to reason with it even though she knows nothing will come of it

So it takes over her body and makes her burn her own fucking town to the ground and destroy it. Thankfully that well and truly severs their bond but jesus fucking christ.

Aaand of course because nothing can ever be easy that last massacre lets the creature come through the hell portal and become an actual god

It stops being a problem for Sidus for the most part but like three years later when she's trying to heal one of her party members does weaponize her trauma to get her to cooperate because they're a piece of shit 👍

[thesapphicsoldier]

Rockie gets way too much hate.

Like yeah, I also prefer other Robin ships and I agree that Vickie isn’t developed enough, but so many people hate rockie and Vickie for like no reason. People forget that there’s still one more season left, and the Duffers could definitely flesh out Vickie more if she gets more screen time and maybe even joins the group. We have to give it time.

And some of the criticisms are just silly. Like “Vickie is basically Robin in a different font”?? The only traits that Vickie has shown to be similar to Robin’s are that she’s awkward and she rambles sometimes. Those are very common traits and both people in a relationship can have them without them being too similar. I agree that Vickie having the exact same analogy for the way her brain works is a little weird, but other than that she’s not “just like Robin.” Like I said, we have to give her time to develop. What if she’s super badass or something, we don’t know!

I’m working on a rockie edit atm and they’re honestly so cute. I already liked them before but they’re seriously growing on me. The banter they have in the pb&j scene???? Adorable.

Vickie, handing Robin a slice of peanut buttered bread: it’s a gift. You’re welcome.

Robin: for me?? You really shouldn’t have.

Vickie: oh but I did!

Literally shut up. Not to sound like a typical lesbian but if I had this conversation with a cute girl I would probably die.

Also Vickie is adorable!! I love her short red hair and her taste in fashion is immaculate.

Anyway, I think people are too harsh on rockie. I think they’re cute and Vickie has a lot of potential, I just hope that the Duffers see that potential and don’t waste it.

[rreskk]

heyyy ! im super curious to know who u'd match me up with if ur still doing these x))

im short (5'1-3" i think), bi, filipino, have glasses and am plus size. i have too much tiddy (G cups,, my back is in constant agony), am also hourglass-ISH shaped but also have a tummy,, also have large arms thx to working construction gigs in the summers (which has also given me a lotta scars on my hands/arms). my hair is a long-ish wolfcut n v dark brown almost black. i have 34 tattoos,, mostly on my arms but a few on my legs. my skintone is pretty tan and my eyes are dark brown

i dress v androgynously,(dont like to appear feminine.) big tshirts, baggy n ripped jeans, flannels, skate shoes, "grandpa sweaters" etc. dont wear jewelry/accessories aside from my piercings (ears and septum) and dont wear makeup

personality wise im v quiet. loooove listening to other ppl talk n not having to talk myself lol. been told im the "mom friend," too many times . been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and major depressive disorder. i also have a lotta trouble concentrating and a rlly shit memory bc of past substance abuse issues so day to day life can be a bit difficult but i try to maintain a positive outlook/be optimistic ! i also v rarely get angry (honestly even when i rlly should be)

my music taste is wildly varied LOL but some fav artists are The Go! Team, Death Grips, The Avalanches, Big Thief, Froth, The Murlocs, and King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard .

aaaaand i think thats abt it ✌️

I match you with… Trevor!

Physical appearance, as far as I concern, is varied between what suits Trevor best and your physique… my oh my, he loves tummies and (as we all know) big tits. Trevor would love all of you, head to toe. He’ll scatter you with love and affection because… he’s simply pleased and very aroused by your overall large arms and one of many tattoos. As a tattoo maniac himself, Trevor’s favourite thing to do is kiss each of your tattoos, every chance he gets.

In response to your aesthetic in general, Trevor doesn’t care about fashion. Although he likes many types of people and tastes, he adores your sense of casualness. Despite having a simple outfit, he likes how it fits around your body. The baggy shirts? He’ll sneak up behind you and shove his hands up like the devil he is. Trevor finds many ways to express his… odd affections, even if that’s getting under your skin… (getting under your clothes).

Ahhh… sensing your ‘mother’ vibe, he is immediately drawn. Wise, quiet, nervous. The opposite of him… but he loves it. Trevor finds comfort in you. His chaos cannot be balanced without your presence. He needs you around him at all times or he’ll go insane, literally. Having someone introverted and quite reasonable makes him all giddy. He sees you as someone he can trust and rely on, something he missed during childhood and later life. You replace his internal worries.

When encountering your history of substance abuse, Trevor understands. He has the tendencies to go… overboard with his own addictions, however, just like how protective he is over Jimmy and alcohol, he’ll keep a close eye on you. Because you are caring and loving toward him, Trevor feels the need to return this efforts and he will by supporting you through the thick and thin. He may be the last person on earth to be good at comforting but he knows how to make you laugh.

Besides… he’ll teach you how to use your anger correctly ;)

Joking. DONT TRUST TREVOR WITH ANGER. Moving on…

Trevor finds your music taste unique. He listens to more… typical angry punk but after hearing your varied songs, he’ll sometimes… just sometimes dig the vibe. You’ll have to catch him on a good day.

(A/N: Thank you for requesting! I’m intrigued with the tattoos! What’s your fav one? I love tattoos hahah)

[sunshine304]

Episode 32, let's go!

We’re still in the flashback to little Xie Yun’s time with the monk. And excuse me but WTF?! XY plays hide and seek with some servant (I guess, he seems to be charged to take care of the little prince), the guy can’t find him, immediately despairs and decides to kill himself about it?! Oh-kay?! I mean, yeah it would be shitty to have lost the heir of the former emperor, but like, my man, the kid was up there in the tree right behind you! Just IDK, turn around? Look up for a moment? WTF.

I guess giving a child a huge guilt complex because a servant chose suicide over actually checking some typical hiding spots is also a way to get that child to start studying instead of fooling around… 눈_눈

Chuchu tells Li Sheng about seeing Yin Pei and wonders about YP's new-found strength. Li Sheng says that there are different ways to achieve such strength, either training + studying for many years, or using some questionable means to speed up the process. But that way usually will have a huge price in the end.Is this ~~foreshadowing~~?

Chuchu tries out the martial arts technique she wrote down in her notes (I think Madame Duan’s?). She’s determined to get it right but I think it doesn’t really work how it’s supposed to.

Lo and behold, Yin Pei arrives! Now with fashionable white streaks in his hair and newly a master of the four mountains (I think? Because he took over for Ding Kui?). He wants to thank Chuchu because she was nice to him in the past. Chuchu feels understandably threatened but before anything can really happen, Li Sheng arrives, notices the fly-whisk from old Master Chongxiao that Yin Pei carries and fights Yin Pei, because he assumes correctly that something happened to the old master. Anyway, he loses, because of course he does. Yin Pei is actually a bit miffed that this wasn’t really much of a fight, but gives him the fly-whisk and leaves again, because he likes Chuchu I guess.

Okay we’re cutting in minute-intervalls between the different groups, got it.

Zhou Fei wants to find the source of the poison, but the monk says that all records from Big Medicine Valley were lost, so they can’t reconstruct the poison and the woman who invented it has vanished, too. Yin Hecong shows up and sneaks up to the boat with unconscious XY.

Somewhere else, but likely close by, because it’s how this show works, Li Yan and Yang Jin are looking for A-Fei.

A-Fei is send on a quest by the monk: retrieve the Fire Lotus plant from the super cold snowy mountains because it serves as a hot poison and therefore counteragent to XY’s poison. This might make him live longer so they’ll have more time to look for an antidote. I find it very daring of the monk to sent her off on her own as she has abysmal sense of direction… XD

Like, the mountain is right there and still she starts walking in the wrong direction...

Ying Hecong has snuck onto the boat and is his usual creepy but also scientifically minded self: he wants to steal XY’s corpse to find out more about the poison. The monk stops him, though. XD

He is found by Li Yan and Yang Jin. I’m glad the one braincell trio is finally complete again! :D

YHC is still unconscious so they bring him to the inn where Chuchu and Li Sheng are, because as I’ve said, they’re all in the same little corner here. XD YHC tries to lie about what happened but then tells them how Zhou Fei killed Chu Tianyu and that she’s okay. Li Sheng seems angry (worried?) and leaves.

Ohhhh there is the evil guy from ep 10 or so, the wannabe disciple of Chongxiao whose name I have forgotten (sth with ‘judge’?). I’d wondered if he’d ever show up again or if the show forgot about him. Anyway, he follows Li Sheng.

Aiyah! There we go! We finally meet Hu Tianying, the evil poison woman! She sits in her pretty garden pavilion, tending to a plant and daintily coughing into her hand. This tells us that she is extremely ill and likely only has a short time left to live.

Thank you, show, for telling us after 30 episodes what the Hai Tian Yi Se actually is (or seems to be)! Woohoo! Shen Tianshu desperately wants it because it (likely) contains the super book of medicine, which might have a treatment for his beloved wife! Hallelujah, relevant information! XD Hu Tianying talks about how she poisoned Xiao Chuan (XY) and that he’s been reckless with his powers and close to dying (she is very well informed). She’s also super clever because she knows that his friends will look for the Fire Lotus, which conveniently will bloom soon. That’s where they can find Zhou Fei and the part of the seal she has.

Shen Tianshu wants to go himself but she worries about him. They instead send Lu Tiankuang instead, who so far has protected her at home, but who comes from the cold mountains and therefore should easily handle Zhou Fei. He also has some wolf nickname, as they all have some cool nicknames… wasn't Shen Tianshu also something with "wolf"?!. XD

Back at the inn! Yin Hecong doesn't want to help or try working on an antidote for XY's poison. Li Yan fake-cries long enough to get Ying Hecong to stay with them anyway and help her look for an antidote after all. YHC and YJ commiserate over being so whipped, because they both just can’t say no to Li Yan when she is "crying". XD

A wounded man from the army shows up at the inn; he is followed by Disha. It’s the same man who sealed young XY’s powers back in the day, and it seems now Disha is hunting him down for, uhhh, something. IDK. The Disha guy following him is the one with the eyepatch and red hair. Too lazy to look up his name again. XD I'm sure we'll see more of him next episode.

Li Yan notices that something is up, and her sense of righteousness makes her stay with the wounded man. She also confronts the Disha guy, because she has a death wish. He laughs at her first but gets angry when she accuses him of bringing shame to Disha with his shitty behaviour.

[jenroses]

I was in my 40s before I went for it, driven to it in extremis when my hair was falling out and I was injured and ill and couldn't keep my arms up in the shower long enough to detangle my curls or braid my hair again after washing it.

But I fell in love with partial buzz cuts in my early 20s, with my first undercut, back when my hair was too thick to manage and I could shave the bottom half of my head and switch between punky and more passing just by whether my hair was up or down.

At first, we cut it to an inch all over, but I was SO sick and the person who did it hadn't had practice with it so it looked very weedy and I looked, well... Anyway I started out in that first pic, oh, 22 years ago, with curly red hair, and 20 years ago it hit peak curl just to give you an idea of what I was starting with. I was in my early 30s for those pics, and the closest I got to dye was henna that pretty much matched my teenage color once it oxidized in.

But the next row was all 2015, when I was so sick, and people kept stopping me to ask about my cancer. It wasn't cancer, just terrible genetics and alopecia and hypothyroid and being very sick with the flu that that year. I never actually recovered completely, still haven't, it's been almost 8 years. but putting some color back on my head made it look deliberate when I had it short enough.

I tried growing it out and hated, so I clipped it back down and started having fun with the color because when your hair turns white you don't really have to prebleach for semi-permanent color to show up.

Somewhere in here I got diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis and a bunch of other stuff.

Since then I usually keep it short in summer and color it and then adopt a hoodie based lifestyle in the winter and don't really think about it much. Right now it's fluffy and wild and mostly white and I keep meaning to clipper it but I go out so little and it is warmer (and also the thyroid and alopecia are being treated, which doesn't mean I'm not super thin on top, but does mean that it's thick enough to be warm at this length now.) These pics are pretty typical of spring/fall for me.

My priority is a) something low maintenance and b) something that looks deliberate so people don't stop me to tell me about their loved ones' struggles with cancer. I don't have cancer, yet (the RA drugs make it more likely) so it's super awkward if people start having big feelings at me when I'm trying to shop. Hoodies are good for that.

But people (Mom) told me when I was growing up that I had "the wrong head shape to shave my head."

Let me tell you, that heads and hair length are like bodies and bikinis. There's no "wrong" head shape.

And it takes me about 20 minutes of effort once a month to keep my hair this short, and about 10 minutes of concentrated activity plus a a shower and a whole lot of wait time to get my hair a funky color, and that means that it is FAR more efficient to wear my hair short and dyed than it is to do literally anything else with longer hair. This length makes care of my hair absolutely minimal--I put a tiny bit of conditioner on it when I shower, that's it.

It's all part of my fashion statement... "Shut up, it's comfortable."

Plus, with rainbow glasses and nails a lot of the time, my hair can coordinate, no matter what I do with it.

i think everybody needs to shave their head at least once in their life. especially if youre scared of getting an ugly haircut or something. get it buzzed and youll freak out for a week maybe but eventually get used to it and enjoy the lack of maintenance and then when it grows out you can try new styles without any anxiety bc now youre cool with shaving it all as a fall back plan. this has been a buzzcut propaganda post

[magnus-sm-writes]

July 10k Update: the Sequel

It’s my second 10k update for June! This Pride Month, I am succeeding. I’m only succeeding because I’m pushing myself to succeed. (Makes me feel like I’m in grade school again, setting myself up for success like this so I can get the rush from it.)

So as of 6/13, I am at 21,760 words this month. Yeah buddy!

Most of those words came from (Demon) Hunting for Love. I wrote a very short personal essay about the “it” part of my pronouns that I might try to publish later on. It’s pretty rough right now. A little too much so, I think. 

I have a habit of skipping around when I write. You could call it a “pretty big problem” if you were feeling particularly blunt, but personally, I like to count it as a strength. A semi-strength. When I’m inspired to write a scene, I slam that guy out, because there’s no point in putting that shit off until you’re no longer interested in it.

There are four different documents for this novel at the moment, which can make word count a little tedious to add up, but it’s super worth it, I promise. The largest portion (10,000 words alone) is basically the first act of the story. We establish Quincy as a huge weirdo who wants to gain the favor of a fellow demon, and Otto as a well-meaning but terrified demon hunter. This covers Otto nearly catching the demon Shax on camera, the beginning of the DemonSpotting controversy (Otto and his partner Trixie broke up a while ago but have been keeping up the charade), and Otto and Quincy’s first meeting, as well as just some Quincy history.

The next chronological document is their first ghost hunt. Yay! It takes place in a dilapidated barn much like the ones that litter the farmland in my hometown, so there’s a lot of love put into the setting.

Next is the scene where Otto calls Quincy his best friend, and the aftermath of that. Quincy is totally unsure of how to handle the fact that he’s let someone so close to him. Emotional issues ahoy.

Then I wrote a tiny kiss scene. I’m talking maybe 200 words. Because I wanted to figure out what their first kiss would be like, and I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be this way.

I made an obligatory (to me) Unnus Annus reference. Remember the escape room video? Ethan apologizing for being scatterbrained because he has ADHD and forgot to take his meds is such a mood. It’s such a serious, silly problem that I share.

“If you can’t tell I have ADHD, I don’t know how observant you are.” Otto glances over at him, then back to the road. “The paranormal’s a fixation of mine. When I don’t have my meds—oh God, I’m a nightmare to be around.” Otto shakes his head at himself. “One time, right, during that Adderall shortage, Trixie and I tried to do an escape room, and I just could not focus on any of the clues.” “Aw, c’mon. None of them?” “None.” Otto deletes a notification about a speed trap. “I think we ended up worse than when we started. Not kidding. I also think the employees thought that Trixie was, like, doing this out of pity, and it was… so embarrassing, dude, holy shit.”

There’s a lot of pretty good banter between the two. Maybe because I’ve been watching a lot of CreepCast and so the teasing banter is just coming easy as an extension of that. Or because I just really love when friends have a lot of good, witty conversations. Otto and Quincy’s chemistry comes across really well on the page.

And in typical Magnus fashion, I had to mention OSHA. My special interests are very dear to me. (That’s sorta the point, I know.)

“People died in that building.” “And we could be added to the list. Look at it, my guy. Like, really look at it.” Quincy gestures to the building with a grandness he feels it doesn’t deserve, pitiful as it looks.  “It looks…” Otto turns the camera to the barn. “Foreboding.” “Foreb—Otto, it looks like an OSHA violation to take me in there!”

This is exactly the sort of conversation I would have with someone. I’m known for casually pointing things out and naming them as OSHA violations. And Quincy only does it to annoy Otto on camera, because he’s a demon and he doesn’t care about OSHA standards as much as he does saying something smart-assy about the weird places Otto drags him.

Also, yes, as Quincy's employee, it is pretty sketchy, OSHA-wise, to make Quincy go into an unsafe building for work purposes. Not that Quincy gives much of a shit.

So, yeah, I’m pretty excited about this novel! It’s a blast to write something so… hmm. I wouldn’t call it “silly”, but perhaps “non-serious”. (Demon) Hunting for Love is just fun!

Ask to be added to the tag list!

[wizardpigeon]

@kittycattscathy largely spite, I don't remember the website BC my mum found it in the end but searching "1830s coat" or frockcoat patterns should get a decent result,

As it stands I'm gonna try and adapt a coat pattern we already have bc the fancy historic one was like, 30 quid, and I'm not dropping 30 on a pattern I could finagle myself,

The pattern I found didn't have the low front but based on the drawings of men's fashion from the 1830s, it did appear just seems to vary person to person

Hang on I'll grab some pictures

Somehow this black and white picture is the clearest look I'll ever get but @emptymasks has been incredibly helpful by already having compiled a ton of pictures from, i think every major production probably, so I didnt have to scrounge around going frame by frame

See with these two, both coats are longer but definitely have the same silhouette, although I'm certain they chose to modernise Der Tods a tad with length and sleeve shape, so while still very recognisable its not a super dated look for the audience who are meant to be going "oh he's pretty hang on"

Which obviously isn't completely dispelled by accurate period wear but if you're dancing around in otherwise full black and I'm like, 98% certain the original coat is velvet or velvet adjacent then no way in hell do you want that fully period accurate because frock coats were not worn while dancing

Again the picture of Uwe isn't great for it but you can tell the skirt of the coat is shorter than my reference pictures, and the sleeves are more of a modern standard compared to the puffy gathering seen on the blue one

You know I cannot find a single damn picture of the ass of Uwes coat? I have to guess if that's pleated if it has the typical flap mechanics, if it's just one continuous skirt

I'm so glad the trousers I can just go "generic military look, shiny buttons" because so help me if they'd put him in visibly period dress Id be very impressed but I'd also want to die,

I'm also assuming hes got like, a possibility short sleeved turtle neck on? Since he's wearing gloves an I know they go up like, mid forearm, hes not visibly in any form of actual shirt with buttons or anything, but its such a solid black that it manages to not show up in the lighting at all

The velvet is going to cause me issues because I cannot figure out if it's, like all black velvet or if it's a very dark blue, cause I know there's actually a dark blue in some sections bc it shows up as visibly blue in multiple scenes (collar and the like, top stripe of the arms), but the rest of the visible stripes we've been attributing to the velvet going in different directions due to paneling

I've got no idea what to do about the buttons tho, it's gotta match the, presumably broach so hopefully I'll be able to get matching buttons in different sizes,

I know I kinda just info dumped but nobody's asked me about it yet and I will take any excuse I've watched this three times in the last week and I've listened to the soundtrack so much I'm starting to understand German, I can sing Der leteze tanz far too well for someone who only knew three words of German a week ago

Somehow with only 90s camera quality and spite I managed to track down an actual pattern for a 1830s frock coat that has the right silhouette for Uwe Krögers Der Tod

[dol--blathanna]

Saovine 2021: ‘Haunted’ and ‘Gothic Horror’

Silence Lay Steadily

Words: 17,616

Fandom: The Witcher (video game series)

Characters: Geralt of Rivia, Female Original Character

Tags: Horror, Gothic Horror, Haunted Houses, Haunting, Halloween, Monsters, Ghosts, Wraith, Canon Universe, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Compliant, Background Geralt/Yennefer, OC, Original Character(s), POV Original Female Character, can you tell i’ve just finished the haunting of hill house lmao, Mystery

Summary: Lady Breta Ingham has a terrible problem – her beloved home is being haunted by a wraith. Luckily for her, Geralt of Rivia has taken the contract. However, he has his work cut out for him as he struggles to figure out what is terrorising Lady Breta, and why.

(In-game canon: takes place shortly before the events of The Witcher 3)

Prompts: “Haunted” and “Gothic Horror” by @oxenfurt-archives​

Read it here!

[steveharrington]

Okay in fairness I do feel like some of the later deaths had better character execution (heh) if that makes any sense. Like I’m super ambivalent to Chrissy as a character but I feel like we got a lot more development for her than Barb. Which might not be an accident bc of how heavy season one is with the character tropes, Barb starts and stays relatively one note bc she doesn’t get a chance to develop/need to do anything else but exist as Nancy’s friend

I will say barb’s death has always kind of rubbed me wrong because the narrative focus on Will makes things kind of uneven like it seems like no one cares about her (except Nancy) in comparison to how much people care about will. Which is obviously necessary for the narrative but then I get to the fact that she died in the upside down even though she was there for a shorter amount of time and I would assume have a better shot as a healthy almost-adult compared to a scrawny child. But it’s also necessary for the horror movie vibes and quite a bit less distressing than will’s death would have been for a lot of the reasons I mentioned

I’m not trying to say the other deaths which were extremely telegraphed were executed better (I still think it’s the best character death*). Stranger things is just really bad at killing off characters

(*honorable mention to Billy bc I love that he died even if I don’t care for how they went about doing it)

see for me it doesn’t particularly bother me that barb didn’t get tons of development beforehand because like ….. she was there for such a short period of time yk? so if we had spent like a good chunk of the first two episodes like delving into who barb is as a person, it would’ve felt weird and not given us as much time with the plot exposition and getting to know our characters who actually live (ooo that sounded brutal sorry barb) and in typical slasher fashion, some people who die for the sake of raising the stakes and establishing danger just aren’t going to get much of a personality before they’re killed.

as for will getting more attention than barb in terms of being missing, i think it’s kinda only natural considering the ties he has to so many of the main characters. he’s joyce’s son, jonathan’s brother, mike lucas and dustin’s best friend. it makes sense that there’s more urgency and attention placed on him because we spend more time with these characters in combination than we do with nancy, who was the only one who really had ties to barb. it is a little weird that hopper doesn’t seem very motivated to find her, i will grant you that. like damn “police chief” we got a missing girl could you like pretend to care pls

it would’ve been nice to maybe explore how will survived for a week in an environment that got barb killed immediately. i guess we’re supposed to extrapolate from the demogorgon being directly behind her at steve’s place that she just….immediately was killed? whereas will had a weapon and some distance idk that’s the best theory i can come up with.

when i say barb’s death is well executed, i mainly mean that it had an obvious impact on nancy. her relationship with barb carried through to the next season, she grieved, it caused conflict between her and steve, and the justice she wanted to get for barb was literally her main plotline in s2 (and jonathan’s!) whereas with other deaths like bob, fred, EDDIE!!!!!, etc the characters they were close to barely react. there’s some sprinkled in mourning for bob, dustin gives his fake ass speech about eddie, fred literally gets nothing from nancy at all, but barb’s death was realistic in the way it affected nancy. i think st’s main problem right now is that the stakes feel so incredibly low. like yeah someone could die but they’ll probably just come back to life, and if they don’t ….. oh well ? our characters won’t be that broken up about it ?? s1 and 2 just did a great job depicting grief and how the absence of a loved one is all consuming and not something that can just be brushed off. s4 is extremely lacking in that area

[thunderbottle]

Thunder's DSMP Disability Headcanons

disclaimer!!! i am sticking to physical disabilities bc honestly delving into the complexity of mental stuff is stressful and physical disabilities easier to apply to characters that like,, already exist yknow

Tubbo

Oh you KNOW this boy has messed up hearing. In my head his right ear is worse (as in he can barely hear anything with it) from the festival execution bc he turned his head away from the fireworks. The various l'manberg explosions also contributed.

I subscribe to the headcanon that being around schlatt sorta 'infected' tubbo with goat traits so bam i'm giving him joint problems in his legs from them changing so fast to be more goat-like. It makes him a bit slower than before and the snowchester cold makes them achey.

Jack

Chronic pain both before and after revival. It's different after he comes back to life, though. It's not any worse or better, just... different. It bothers him more than he lets on. He can't even find comfort in the familiar pain. sadge.

Tommy

same deal as tubbo with being a bit HOH. the repeated explosions during exile would not have treated him kindly.

also related to exile: on the way to techno's house and living in a hole in the middle of the tundra, i feel like he's missing a few fingers and one of his feet from frostbite (y'know how he lost a shoe? yeah.) He makes his own prosthetic while staying with techno but doesn't use it all the time bc it's painful. he's got a fancy crutch that sam made for him which is a lot more comfortable most of the time.

another exile one bc i feel like that whole experience (being hurt often, no real access to first aide, lack of a steady food source, etc etc) would be Not Great for a person's health. Dream dislocated one of his shoulders 'on accident' and it hasn't quite healed correctly, often re-dislocating when he's carrying heavy things or stretching it the wrong way.

Ranboo

my ranboo design has wacky kangaroo rat legs that aren't super suited to,, working correctly so he wears braces on the ankles and knees to keep them bending correctly. he also uses those coon forearm crutches like in that one fanart i did of him forever ago.

okay this isn't a hc but can i just say i'm so happy that c!ranboo is like,, canonically disabled. like ik it's bc he's enderboy but Still i love it sm. thank you mr. beloved

Awesamdude

he was born partially blind and relies a lot on sound. his redstone machine have a lot of essential parts that intentionally make extra noise so he knows they're working correctly and with the right timing.

he wears the gasmask half as a fashion statement and half bc he's got asthma and the redstone dust that typically doesn't bother other people can be dangerous to work with for him and trigger asthma attacks, especially at the quantities he works with.

Philza

caneza!!! he has trouble keeping his balance with his wings out of commission so he weathers the increased old-man-shaming in favor of being able to walk lmao

Wilbur

making this one short bc thinking abt c!wilbur makes me sad

chronic fatigue syndrome!! get some rest tall child!! like i know it doesn't really help but still!!! *wraps alivebur up in blankets like a feral, injured cat* i care you!!!!

Eret

okay i know that the herobrine eyes are bc she's related to herobrine somehow but i'm making her blind anyways. herobrine is blind too. you can't stop me.

guide ferrets... (context: eret's chat is a hoard of ferrets that follows him around it's very good)

he makes all his own buildings so that he has the floorplan memorized before even moving in. how do they turn out so pretty when he can't see them? well, he's more powerful than you could ever know and can do anything he puts his mind to so jot that down

Techno

this pig has ARTHRITIS

technocane!!!!! i love him

If you want me to expand on any of these send me an ask or in the reblogs of this post! Feel free to add on your own hcs within the wheelhouse I'd love to hear them <3

[thekats]

Oh, do not apologise for a long reply, please! This discussion is super stimulating for me right now 😄 case in point: this addition 😳

To me, Crowley's reservations showing emotion strongly relate to the trauma of the fall (including being disowned, the war in heaven, etc). "Gebranntes Kind scheut das Feuer"/"Once bitten, twice shy". We saw him emote very openly when he was still an angel, the next time (that we've seen him) is in Eden where he is very neutral, the only reactions we get (that I can remember off the top of my head) are "The Great Plan's ineffable?" in a sarcastic, kind of bitter tone, and the glee at Aziraphale's little dip into free will. But he isn't actively antagonising Aziraphale or God's fun new creation. This we see throughout the centuries; he does his job, but in the most harmless, neutral ways he can think of, searching for loopholes. But he has been burnt (cross-language-callback-pun, giving myself a wahoo) and not least because of his emotional attachment to the universe and resulting disappointment, anger and questioning. Much like you said about Aziraphale (especially in that linked post, which is fantastic, although I'd like to slap a bunch of "conventionally" stickers in there bc types still vary and I, for one feel no attraction towards Crowley aka David Tennant's physical appearance, but Aziraphale aka Michael Sheen ticks all the boxes), Crowley is traumatised and has his shields up. What I think might be a fascinating theory is the emotions they are more prone to let through potentially being tied to the kind of being they are respectively. Angels are beings of love and goodness (or so they would have us believe), so Aziraphale loses the stronghold on his emotions to happiness and love the quickest. Demons are (again allegedly) beings of hatred and evil, so Crowley's grips slips easiest around his anger and drive for mischief. The question here being, of course, if that's a fact of nature or nurture. But it's only a theory anyway.

Anger or other negatively-received feelings have long been observed to be more dramatically thrilling for audiences (both for stories and real life situations), whereas happiness is often considered boring and doesn't drive a narrative like conflict does. People want Crowley to be more in touch with his emotions because they want to live that accomplishment of finding happiness vicariously through him. It's catharsis. Aziraphale "just needs to get his shit together" and loosen up some because he already portrays happiness so frequently, "what more could he possibly want?!" Crowley's emotions are more obvious this way, a narrative way.

Paradoxically, toxic masculinity has rendered anger near illegible as an emotion in men (or people read as men), so Crowley appears to be less emotional or emotionally repressed which anger is typically regarded as a symptom of. In this way, happiness becomes more visible, too. It is now seen as Aziraphale rubbing it in their faces how happy he is, which is a stance borne of envy, obviously.

I'd personally argue that they both keep a lid on their pots of emotions in fairly equal fashion, though Crowley does appear a little free-er, especially in S02, that one scene in his car (you know the one, Beelzebub shows up and interrupts his moment of vulnerability). We haven't really seen that kind of deflation in Aziraphale yet. Aziraphale's willingness to go back to heaven also indicates this. Crowley was the driving force in stopping Armageddon in S01, we know he doesn't want the world to end and would do a lot to prevent that. Going back to heaven, where he could assist and protect Aziraphale (as he's been doing so often for so long), however, is something he isn't willing to do. Safe for that short trip with Muriel, of course, but that was not becoming an angel again. Either he doesn't believe Aziraphale really can change anything up there or he's just too traumatised and feels he has failed to steer Aziraphale clear of being manipulated so hard that he'll either be equally traumatised in the end or they just lose each other. Or it's both of those. Either way, he is showing a major flaw in that scene in my book bc he doesn't have faith in Aziraphale. Which is fine. I don't blame him as a character and I can see where he's coming from (literally). Crowley isn't the only one betrayed or abandoned in that moment.

That's my reading of it any way. I could go into more detail and cross-reference a whole bunch, but at this point, I'm writing a BA thesis and I've already gotten that degree 😅

Long story short: they aren't that dissimilar. But what you said and pointed to with that linked post is true; they are perceived to be for multiple hierarchical reasons embedded in the whole society controlling trash heap of white supremacy that sets Aziraphale at a disadvantage based on his clear portrayal of neurodivergent behaviours, attractiveness as measured by convention and expectations of emotional capacity in predominantly Male-presenting characters (real or fictional). Hope I didn't miss anything. The Conclusion/summary was always my greatest weakness 😂

It might seem crazy what I'm about to say, but since I can't really read people's expression well (thanks for that, autism) I have a different approach. You see, I like acting myself, yes, in part because it's a type of controlled masking and learning how to human in a socially acceptable way, so I analyse (fictional) characters' emotions etc by imitating facial expressions and seeing what that triggers in me. Kind of like associations, but mindsets, intents and emotions.

That's what I keep doing with Aziraphale specifically since he is who people keep criticising (bc Crowley obviously is perfect and doesn't make mistakes /s) and evidently not understanding him at all but I don't want to get upset about this again.

This is how I knew he wasn't disgusted (????) by the kiss and I've got an idea about how he feels in the lift to heaven at the end of s02.

The best one-word answer i can boil it down to is: defiance. He's going against all odds, against expectations and perhaps even his own better judgement/instinct. Like, he knows what he wants to do is risky and potentially dangerous, but he has to do it for the world, himself and Crowley, perhaps even a little in spite of him. He can do this. Yes, he paints himself as a damsel in distress a lot. Yes, he like the comforts and pleasures of earth and humanity. But don't you go underestimating him.

Part of me thinks he thinks the Metatron thinks (there's so much thinking involved here wow we're thoughtful) he's an easy puppet. Naive, innocent, believes in the unwavering and undebatable goodness of heaven. A toy soldier he can command and make do what he needs done. And in a way Aziraphale is all that. But he also isn't stupid. He's witnessed heaven's stance on ineffable plans during Nopeageddon, had his heart broken and his faith in God's institution shaken. He knows The Second Coming can't mean good news for earth, especially since Crowley's voiced his suspicion "all of us against all of them".

Aziraphale is being brave, resuming his position as a fighter, a guardian, only the Eastern Gate has expanded to mean the whole world and Crowley, maybe even Hell because balance is necessary for shades of grey and their lives hold value, too, after all.

He's on a mission and by God (no pun intended) he plans to accomplish it. There's no South Downs without earth or, indeed, without Crowley.

[erza-haninozuka]

Hi there! Insomnia actually recommended I check you out for romance and hornee manga recs. What would you recommend?👉👈

Ah yes, you have come to the right place anon. So I don’t know if you have a preference when it comes to the character relationships such as yaoi, yuri, or straight. I will go ahead and let you know that a lot of them are straight orientated. I’ve recently gotten into some yaoi and still have to find some good yuri. Any that are BL will be marked with an * Also going to try to not give a huge list and get carried away lol. And if you want any more recs I’d happily oblige! 

Let’s start with hornee manga!

Fire in His Fingertips: A Flirty Fireman Ravishes Me with His Smoldering Gaze This series is super fucking hot, pun intended. It’s even got an anime too and they’re coming out with the second season this July. It’s currently an ongoing series with a total of 4 volumes. Release dates for volume 3 and 4 for English have yet to be announced though. 

My Boss Has XL Size This is another series with an anime adaptation. It’s currently ongoing as well and it’s got an interesting approach compared to some of the other hornee manga I’ve seen. 

Did My Biceps Turn You On? I feel like every male lead I find delicious, but this one is Top Tier. This one is currently ongoing and contains one of the most considerate male leads I’ve found. 

Love is An Illusion* BL and ABO. What else can I say? Actually, I’ll say this is honestly one of my favorite BL series though. 

Faithful and Unfaithful This one is short and sweet and full of the dirty deed. 

As for romance... Oh gosh. I’m gonna try to keep this at five even though I can recommend so much more. I’ve been on a huge hornee and romance kick.

An Incurable Case of Love This series recently ended and I loved it so much. I really wish it went longer but I’m happy with the way it ended and wasn’t dragged on for too long. It’s 7 volumes that’s got some normal romance tropes but they were strategically done.

Everyone’s Getting Married Oh my god. I wish I was kidding when I say this is one of my favorite romance series. This one is completed at 9 volumes. The characters are so well written and there are those typical romance tropes as well, but they are done at the right times and definitely don’t feel so dragged out in some instances. They are one of my favorite couples not only because of their character, but because of how realistic they feel. It’s a very good romance for a modern time where there’s more people nowadays who aren’t looking to get married while some still hold that ideal, or even the old fashioned idea of being an at home mom. 

Sweat and Soap I know the title sounds a bit weird and it’s a bit out there, but this had to be mentioned after the previous one because this series contains my next favorite couple. Their relationship is very well written and feels so realistic too. I promise it’s worth the read. The main character’s relationship is just so well balanced. They help each other and grow as people. So far as it’s currently up to volume 6 being released in English. (I have yet to read 6 though since it’s coming in the mail) But we get to see the female lead grow more confident in herself because of this relationship. It’s very wholesome.

Perfect World If you enjoy ones that incorporate a disability of some type this is one I recommend. I personally enjoy reading these kinds not only because the way the mangaka’s give us a glimpse into their life and struggles, but how someone may go about a relationship. I’m so glad this series doesn’t glorify or romanticize the male lead’s disability. Rather we see the female lead face the reality of his world and what it entails. We see how daunting it can be at first because aspects of their world are so different. If you want a romance that’s really going to sucker punch you in the feels this is your go to. 

Something’s Wrong With Us I got insomniac into this series. If you want a mystery romance then I highly suggest this one. A lot of times with murder mysteries you can tell in an instant, however this is one of few series that you don’t know who did it. We get to see a romance bud as the sheep goes into the wolves den. 

This Wonderful Season with You* I was going to leave it at five but I really, really needed to throw this BL romance in here. It’s so freaking cute seeing our two male leads interact with each other and grow a relationship. It’s extremely wholesome and if you love BL this has to be added to your list.