#also i will try to get back to messages eventually i am just so mentally ill i am SORRY

[finniestoncrane]

trying to look outwardly mean and scary and pretending i don't give a fuck is hard when i smile like i'm filled with rainbows at leaves with a neat shape and also at leaves without a neat shape bcause i don't want them to feel left out

[pepprs]

you will never be too old to find someone for you. society puts a lot of emphasis on dating in high school or right after but in reality the number of people who stay in those relationships untill marriage is low. real life doesnt prioritize those years! you are never done meeting people who will love you and you will love too. there is no timer ticking down. 24 is not too old, i promise.

i know you’re right 😞😞😞 idk why i have issues abt this bc most of the ppl i spend time w / follow on inst*gram (where i saw that post 🥴) / etc are at least a couple yrs older than me if not decades and also in most cases didn’t meet their person until they were around my age or older so it’s like why not enjoy the ride and just trust that it’ll all fall into place bc ur teens and 20s are definitely not as stable or happy or whatever as they’re made out to be sometimes. i think i just need to stop looking at social media that isn’t tumblr and find a different counselor and learn how to drive 😭

[paigesfuturewifey]

authors note! IM SORRY FOR BEING MIA college was kicking my ass (still is) and i’m trying my hardest not to crash out but here is an angsty fic :D

this is also heavily inspired by she wouldn’t be gone by blake shelton IK IK country music sue me it is unfortunately part of my roots so yes here she is

“i’m sick of this caitlin!”

you two had been going back and forth for a while about this, both too stubborn to admit who was in the right and who was in the wrong.

it’d been two months since caitlin went first pick in the wnba draft. two months of caitlin continuously forgetting about your date nights, two months of caitlin lagging hours on end and then eventually responding to your messages with one word replies, two months of wondering if caitlin would be home from practice at a decent hour or if you’d go to sleep in a cold, empty bed.

two. fucking. months.

of course, you understood the fact that caitlin’s job required almost all of her undivided attention and you were extremely proud of her and all her accomplishments.

but being second priority to her job was taking a toll on your mental health.

you were tired of being alone all the time. the sacrifices you made, picking up everything and moving to indiana with caitlin to be with her, felt pretty fruitless when you had barely seen her in your own apartment.

caitlin’s response came low at first as she rubbed her temples, “what do you want me to do?” and then she repeated it louder, throwing her arms up in frustration, “what do you want me to do?!”

“i want you to be here! you’re never here anymore, caitlin! i’m alone ALL THE TIME now!”

“that’s not fair. i’m doing this for us! for— for you!”

you shook your head, pointing an accusatory finger at her. “no. no. not for me. this is what you wanted! you wanted this! i didn’t—“

“i didn’t ask you to move to indiana with me!”

the statement felt like a slap to the face. caitlin, of all people, knew how hard of a decision it was to move to indiana. to be away from your family. your sister, your parents.

caitlin never pressured you into it, of course. she was insistent that if you had decided to stay in iowa, you’d make long distance work. but when you ultimately decided to stay with, whom you thought was the love of your life, caitlin couldn’t of been more happier.

the two of your popped a bottle of champagne in celebration and spent the night talking, laughing, planning your futures together.

a bittersweet memory that seemed so distant at the moment.

as you narrowed your eyes, you felt a tear roll down your cheek, followed by three or two more. “you know what, caitlin? you’re right. you didn’t ask. but it was a sacrifice i was willing to make for you!”

“you’re not the only one making sacrifices—“

the mere start of the sentence had you letting out a laugh, putting your hands behind your head as you paced back and forth. “you’re not listening.”

“i am listening—“

“no! you’re hearing me but you’re not listening to me!”

silence fell upon the two of you, both contemplating your next words because you both knew you guys were pretty close to crossing lines that couldn’t be uncrossed.

you placed your hands on the counter, leaning on it while hanging your head low, letting the tears drop onto the floor. “i can’t do this anymore,” you finally let out in a small whisper, but it hit caitlin in the gut. “i don’t want a life where i spend more time waiting for you than being with you.”

“you don’t mean that. please baby, stop.” caitlin’s warm hands were suddenly around your waist, leaning her head on your shoulder and kissing softly. “let’s just go to bed, yeah? i promise, i promise things will be different, okay? i’ll make more of an effort. i’ll try and get home on time for dinner. i know things aren’t easy right now, but i can’t lose you. we’ll figure it out, i’ll— i’ll try harder. okay?”

but even when those words eased your mind a little, you both knew the promise wouldn’t be kept.

so it wasn’t really a shock to you when you sat at the dinner table, candles lit and your meal sitting in front of you with the empty chair across from you.

you cooked caitlin’s favorite meal, wore her favorite set underneath your clothes that was her favorite color. you looked at the clock, and when it read 10:30, you scoffed.

you were fed up. you were well over your boiling point.

and, so, when caitlin entered your guys’ apartment at midnight, her heart ached a little at the sight of your untouched meals at the table, and candle she assumed was lit at one point.

she rubbed a hand over her face, quickly walking to your shared room. then she froze in her spot.

your side of the room was empty. from your nightstand being stripped of its decorations, to your side of the closet being completely empty.

the suitcases you used for when you guys planned vacations were gone. along her your toothbrush, makeup, hair products, basically everything that made your shared apartment shared was gone.

caitlin wasted no time picking up her phone and clicking your contact, holding the phone to her ear. she anxiously waited, suddenly feeling as if her whole life was falling apart.

voicemail. she tried seven more times. all went straight to voicemail.

her mind immediately went straight to denial, there was no way you picked up and left, right? you always said you would, but caitlin never believed you. never truly believed you.

or maybe she just didn’t listen to you.

she snatched her keys from the table, leaving the apartment and shutting the door loudly behind her. she bet all her money that her neighbors hated her.

that’s how she ended up in her car, speeding down the highway on a rainy night, frantically calling all of your shared friends.

she started with your mom, driving down the road at 90 miles an hour and switching lanes like an absolute maniac. she’d gotten honked at at least four times already.

“caitlin.” your mom greeted, though judging by her cold and and distant tone, and her use of caitlin’s full name instead of cait, caitlin could tell the news had no doubt got back to her.

“do you know where she is, mrs. l/n?” her question came right off the bat, figuring she had no time to waste in finding you.

your mom’s answer was quiet. and caitlin learned your families habits quickly enough to know that when she went quiet, she was lying. “please—“

“i’m afraid i can’t speak with you now, goodbye caitlin.”

then the line went dead.

with her left hand on the steering wheel, she punched the middle with her right and threw her head back.

her next call was kate because you three all had been very close throughout your iowa college years. kate always understood you in a way that made caitlin jealous.

and for a while, she she was a topic of argument in your relationship because caitlin constantly needed reassurance that she was the one you wanted.

there was clearly a rift in caitlin and kate’s friendship after, but after the move to indiana, they seemed to be mending their friendship. until now.

kate answered on the first ring with a hard question. “what’d you do, clark?”

“kate, i— i fucked up. she’s gone. i don’t know where she went. her stuff’s gone, her clothes are gone, she’s gone.”

“damn it, caitlin. you always do this shit— you drove her away, again.“

“do you know where she is?” caitlin demanded, arriving to her first destination.

“no.”

“you’re lying.”

“no i’m not—“

“i should’ve figured you wouldn’t help me find her. you’ve always been pathetically in love with her, ever since college.” caitlin scoffed out bitterly.

“caitlin—“

“know what? no. you’ve always been on her side, since day one. i can’t even do this right now—“

“you’re frustrated with yourself, about driving y/n away, so your picking a fight with me.” kate spoke calmly, fueling caitlin’s anger.

“don’t fucking psycho analyze me, right now martin.” with that she abruptly ended the call, getting out of the car and walking into the ice cream shop the both of you loved dearly.

after that, she went to your favorite coffee shop, after that, nalyssa’s apartment, then aliyah’s, then the hotel near your apartment.

she held her face in her hands, finally letting the sobs ripple through her. she suddenly realized how under appreciated your voice was. she was forgetting how sweet it was, how beautiful it was when you hummed her to sleep.

she was forgetting your voice already.

and she realized that she should’ve fought harder. should’ve told you how much she loved you, cherished you, needed you.

maybe, just maybe, if she had done that, you wouldn’t be gone.

safe to say caitlin didn’t find you that night, and no one told her where you might’ve went.

[thebibliosphere]

Hi there, ive come from your post about ADHD and emotional disregulation, firstly thank you so much for putting it into words, its such a complicated part of how i deal with emotions and i havent ever been able to articulate how to why.

Secondly, in that post you mentioned how you've used stress as a motivator and how eventually your stress regualtion broke, i was wondering if you'd be willing to talk about that? (If not, its not a problem)

I feel like the same thing has happened to me but until i read your post i had no idea that something had... snapped? I suppose? I struggle with motivation all the time and in the past id have a week or a few days left and id be able to suddently push myself very hard to complete whatever it is before the deadline, just barely making it in most cases. However now it seems that i can't find that motivation anymore, deadlines come and pass and i can't being myself to work on anything, and i just end up spiralling into shame and guilt. That motivation was the only thing that I was able to rely on sometimes for things like uni, and i conviced myself that it was just me growing lazy or trying to get out of responsibility as to why the "last minute panic-mode" doesnt work anymore.

Again, if you don't wanna tackle this can of worms or if it's something youd rather not post online i totally get it, its no biggie! thanks so much for making the original post as well, it means a lot

Hello friend, thanks for the message. I'm sorry you're also dealing with this.

The good news here is that I've already talked about this using the rubber band analogy my therapist gave me. (Stress is like a Rubber Band)

If you don't have the mental bandwidth to read all of it now, the tl;dr is "stress is like a rubber band; it can stretch to hold numerous things in place when you need to, but if you do it too often or keep adding more and more strain under the band, the elastic eventually becomes brittle and snaps, taking your mental and sometimes physical health with it too."

I've been in intensive therapy for this for roughly three years now, and trying to piece my brain back together after my last bout of stress-induced productivity gave me a total mental breakdown.

It's... odd not being able to use stress and having to actively avoid it to avoid a relapse. But it is doable. Medication would help, but alas, I've got weird health issues and am unmedicated at the minute.

(And just in case that sparks anyone to go, "Oh, you do all this unmedicated! Wow, that's so inspiring!" as sometimes parents do to me on here as they then tell me they don't want to medicate their kids, I've unfortunately also written a post about what that kind of success looks like from an unmedicated perspective and the kind of suicidal ideation I deal with on the regular because I cannot take meds. It is not pleasant reading, but it is necessary for some folks, specifically anti-med, "if you just tried harder" people.)

A book you may find helpful is Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. It was very validating for me to read about other people going through the same things, and made me feel less of a "this is a personal failing on my part" and more of a "Oh okay yeah, no stress literally breaks people."

It helped soothe some of my own internalized "I just need to try harder" and helped cement me on the path I was already going down with my ADHD therapist toward changing how I view myself and how I manage my ADHD.

I hope that helps! If you've got more specific questions or I didn't touch on something in my old post, I can try to answer them :)

[diaprincess-dl]

First of all, thank you for who you are, and especially for choosing to share it with the world.

I am DL, with very few AB tendencies, if I understand correctly, you are also like that, with a connection to the DL world mainly.

There are very few women in the community in general, and in particular those who are DL. It's really refreshing to see that the first girl I notice that she's DL, she's also the most amazing beauty I've ever seen wearing diapers, and with a face that has real angelic cuteness.

I wanted to ask, and I would be very happy if you could answer, Even if not a complete answer, at least to know that you read and saw what I wrote, it will be very, very flattering to me.

When did you start wanting to wear a diaper? Is it sexual? If so, at what age did you realize it was related to sexual arousal? And if not, what in your soul makes you want this? At what age did you first put on diapers after initial weaning from diapers? And according to the fact that you had, from what I understand, late night wets, did your parents force you to wear a diaper? And when was the first time you put on a diaper in a section where it was clear to you that it was a so-called 'forbidden act'?

Sorry for the flood of questions.

I had a theory that was destroyed because of you, that these are only men can be a DL, because the sexual sensation associated with diapers somehow comes from stimulation and friction of the genital organ at a very young age in a diaper, which causes the brain to develop something very primitive to want a diaper, something that, technically, does not happen with women or should not happen for obvious reasons. And this is the reason that from the very, very basic tests I did, a lot of DL, these are children who were weaned at a relatively late age, 3, 4 and even 5. Then they develop the desire to wear a diaper, and at the age of 13 or so, it develops into something sexual. And that is why women are not DL, because the stimulation is supposed to be a lot more rarer.

One last thing I want to tell you is that the day I see a picture of you with a soaked diaper under your clothes, my day looks like rainbow.

Thank you so much for this!!!

Hiiyaaa 💕👸🏼

Thank you for such a kind message 🤗 I am definitely more into the DL side of things, you are absolutely correct but I do love some aspects of the AB side, I just don’t tend to share them online as much.

So I just started kindof dabbling in the world of diapers a few years ago, but had been wetting my pants and bed (some accidents, some on purpose) for literal years before I discovered the idea of wearing diapers… When I was a teen I went through phases where I would wet my bed like every night on purpose and then try to hide the evidence in the morning from my parents 🤦🏼‍♀️ they mentioned things a couple of times, but nowhere near the amount I was actually wetting the bed… they probably knew though lol.. l I definitely have a watersports kink, absolutely 🙊. Anyway I felt so silly for not thinking about the idea of using diapers sooner but diapers just never occurred to me lol. A few years back I saw my first porn video with another girl in a diaper and I was just in awe and had to try it myself 🤭.

Slowly I started to indulge more and more into blogs and personal ab/dl blogs to the point that I just kindof gradually mentally got myself in a space where I thought that I could try wearing diapers more often, which started off as just at night (when I was 26 to answer one of your questions)…. But somewhere in this phase I realized the convenience aspect of wearing 👀.. I could actually go through a full night in bed without having to get up to pee, so what started as a kink lead to discovering more than just that. I started wearing diapers all night, every night and just got used to waking up and wetting them, but this slowly, and I do mean slowly, about a year of wearing every night, turned into me starting to barely remember waking up to wet and eventually just flat out not remembering/not waking up and wetting myself most nights of the week. This was kindof scary but also turned me on? 🤷🏼‍♀️🤭 sooo I just kept doing it.

Here’s where the “convenience” aspect let me start wearing during the day: long road trips or long days out with my partner meant there was no real good spots to stop for the restroom all of the time. Things like concerts or big gatherings where there is drinking and long lines for the ladies room… I started wearing diapers to some of these things, not much as first but when I’d go back to not being diapered and have to suffer waiting in line, or waiting for a pit stop.. it was those moments that I seriously realized how much better it was being padded 💡 It was a little scary at first wearing diapers in public, especially wetting them.. also especially because I typically wear leggings or short dresses, so there is always some way that it can be seen. I’ve slowly just started to realize most people don’t care what you’re wearing for underwear, especially strangers. Friends on the other hand… 😬🫠 I know that some of my friends have noticed my diapers. I’ve had friends over for wine nights and forgot (on multiple occasions) to throw away my night time diapey and it was folded up on the bathroom floor and two of my friends went in there before I had went in and noticed. I’ve had a leak while waiting for a cab with my other friend and it was just us waiting outside in the quiet and I know she could hear the leaking onto the pavement. I also have multiple pictures on here of a diaper(s) I was wearing for while we were all hanging out…. So like all that and many other random occasions I’m sure lots of my friends know I wear diapers, I’m just waiting for someone to say something 🙊🙊 but part of me knowing they know, secretly turns me on? I’m super weird 🫠

So anyway since I knew there was a really big and accepting community out there for this, I finally got the courage to make a blog on Tumblr. It actually just started out as a personal blog for myself to be honest. Just a place where I could document my progress and share this side of me, for pictures I could go back and look at… I had no idea it would blow up like this. 😳 but I am extremely grateful and happy about it 💕💕

I wear diapers all of the time now, and am 100% nighttime bladder incontinent, and daytime at this point of a year wearing diapers 24/7 and NEVER trying to hold it….. I’m like basically there for daytime incontinence. 2 years ago I could totally hold it for hours like any other girl, but now I legitimately need diapers to keep me ‘dry’. I did it all to myself and part of me can’t believe it, but most of me is really happy I did it to myself 💕

[nicromancytarot]

HOW I GOT STARTED IN TAROT AND MY TIPS FOR ANY OF YOU WHO ARE NEW TO IT!!!

I love to offer advice if you can’t already tell, and I also love tarot, so let’s talk about things that I have learnt from my journey as a tarot reader.

My journey

I started tarot at 14 years old while living with a family member who was shut off to the idea of spirituality, as it had hindered the life of my own mother, and caused her mental health issues in the past.

I decided to go against their requests and start practicing in secret, I didn’t have my own income so I wasn’t able to buy my own deck, instead I decided to make one. (Tarot is a tool, you don’t need “actual” tarot cards to be able to read.)

I used old train tickets that I had since I would take a couple of trains 5 days a week, which would give me 1, if not 2 tickets per day.

I was mainly focused on love, so I created little tarot cards with small details about love on them, and I would use these on my friends just for a bit of fun.

Eventually these got taken away from me, so just after my 16th birthday, after not doing tarot for around 3 months at that time, I decided to buy my first tarot deck as I was now living back with my mother, and although she was sceptical about the idea, she allowed me to have my first deck and supported my journey as I dove deeper into divination.

I practiced every so often, one time I had a crush on this guy and I wanted to know how he felt about me, every spread I got for him would give me the 4 of cups… yeah, I used to think that meant he was just a little demotivated, until I realised like a year later that it meant he was absolutely not interested in me, lmao!

But this is good, learning always comes with mistakes, so do not let that discourage you.

My decks

- the Rider-Waite tarot (my main deck)

- Spirit song tarot (my favourite deck)

- (I had a purple one that I spiritually didn’t need, so it went missing and never returned like a week after I got it)

- Ethereal visions tarot

- The nightmare before christmas tarot

- Angels of abundance oracle

- Casanova tarot (for 18+)

I also use little pieces of paper that I wrote 18+ stuff on, which I now use for any explicit readings to highlight the things someone would do to my collective sexually!

Having multiple decks

I personally love having this many decks, and I 100% will be getting more, as soon as I’ve finished learning the meanings of some of the casanova tarot!

Tarot is a tool, sometimes I read explicit stuff off my main deck, and I still get very accurate messages using that, you do not need to splash out on extra decks to try and read one specific theme.

I enjoy having multiple decks as they’re all just so beautiful, and I feel blessed to be able to have them.

Having one of my decks fall off the face of the earth a year and a half ago, proved to me that I needed to really make sure that I wanted a deck and felt connected to it before buying. This deck itself was 1 actually instinctively didn’t want to buy, but went back to get for other reasons.

So don’t impulsively buy, if it’s meant for you, you’ll know.

How I do my readings

If I decide that I need to cleanse my own energy, I will do a 15-30 minute meditation, but I normally only feel called to do so when I’m doing a really intense reading that I feel I need to protect my energy from.

I start off with a simple affirmation, welcome my spirits to help guide me through the session.

“I am calling upon my ancestors and spirit guides to make sure I am protected during this reading, and that I get the most accurate and concise messages.”

Then I knock on the deck twice before doing 1 shuffle thrice, knocking twice and doing the final shuffle thrice, knocking twice.

That is my own personal way of cleansing my deck after other energies have been channelled through it. I let my decks rest with some crystals every night, and they see the moon when it’s full for an extra cleanse.

I personally find the knocking to be very simple and cleansing for my cards, and it has proved well.

After I’m done cleaning, I ask my spirits the question out loud, and then I knock twice before shuffling to get the spread.

I only take 1-2 cards at a time, if there’s more, I put them back and start shuffling again.

If no cards fall after a while, I do a final shuffle and pull from the top.

The spread varies for every reading, normally I pull around 15 cards from my main deck, and then I pull an animal from the Spirit song tarot deck, and sometimes around 12 from another deck if there’s anymore questions needing to be answered.

When reading for other people, I personally only pull upright, unless we’re doing yes or no questions (which I do upright for yes and reverse for no), I’m not a fan for reverses, although I’ve started off with them, I just find it easier to do only uprights.

I pull reverses for educational purposes when I do my own readings, that way I can make sure I learn them more than I already do, and so I can get quicker with identifying them.

As of the beginning of April 2024 I started a new spread, this is my new favourite one for mainly advice readings or something to do with the future.

I like to grab 16 cards, you can take 15, but 16 is my personal number, then I line all the cards up into 3 groups, until I pin the negative cards, this is just something I do instinctively (doesn’t have to be death, tower etc, it could literally be the 2 of cups which seems negative in the reading), on the left I set up the negative ones, and then I add a present feeling or reaction card to do with these negative things, then between the negative and feelings, I put a card to describe why the person feels like that. Then for the rest I basically branch down like the roots of a tree, it’s very sporadic and random, but it creates a story, whichever card is next to another relates to the situation, thoughts and feelings of those cards, then when you get to the right bottom side, you end up with the future energy.

LEFT —> past MIDDLE —> present RIGHT —> future

Random things that I believe in

- The star and the 4 of cups are connected, the 4 of cups represents being fussy and ungrateful, and in the the Rider-Waite tarot, the illustrations are all connected, the star happens in front of the tree which is where the 4 of cups is set, so I like to think that the star is letting go of fussiness and allowing yourself to be free.

- Death and moon are connected, death tends to talk about something you need to let go of, and you already intuitively know about it. This is since death happens in front of the moon.

- The temperance happens in front of the tower, so when you pull the temperance, it means to make a decision before the universe makes it for you, bringing you a tower moment. A good example for this is pulling it in a “how does he feel about me” reading, if you get the tower during this, I would say he feels like you’re his last option, like a plan B if his A falls through. (People hate when I tell them that.)

- The queen of cups represents stability, this is since in the the Rider-Waite tarot, she’s chilling on her throne on a small island, meanwhile the king of cups is floating in the water, showing to me that he’s just going with the flow (weirdly, when I see the king of cups, I associate him with Aquarius energy.)

- The empress is all about loud and proud energy, she’s totally the one to boast about her achievements and what she’s working on, knowing that she will succeed. The emperor is the opposite, he works in silence, he only tells everyone about his newest achievements after he’s sure about them, he likes for people to be in surprise over his success.

- If I pull some cards to check energy for the reading, and the emperor upright, or the empress in reverse comes out, probably means the person I’m reading for isn’t ready to hear this message. This is because the emperor is physical (3D) realm energy, meanwhile the empress is spiritual (4D) energy, this is because spirituality is feminine energy, if you take part in spirituality, you are tapping into your devine feminine.

- The knight of wands represents exes. The night is going to the left (the past), the wand represents fire, fiery passion/fiery ending.

Does this mean my spread may be explained differently if the illustrations are different?

In short, yes. I love symbolism with my whole heart, so when I can make something symbolic out of the illustrations on the deck to describe a reading, I absolutely will.

What does channelling and visualising look like for me?

On a good day, I’ll hear another voice that sound identical to my little internal narrator inside my head, this can be identified as my spirit guides. They will use this to tell me things I need to know, but clairvoyance isn’t really my strongest, so normally I just hear the word “catapult” over and over again, since my main spirit guide seems to love that word.

I honestly channel the most through writing, it’s like I gain so much more information when I start writing down readings, whether it’s in my notes, on tumblr, or in a notepad.

Visualising is interesting, again back with the symbolism, it comes to me in a little story for me to unfold and find a moral of, it’s very time consuming, and I often get confused and think I’m insane, so I’ll pull some cards on it just to be sure I have the story right.

Important notes

- communicate to your spirit guides, I like to tell them exactly how the reading is going to go, just so they understand the format and what, I am looking for.

- Don’t do readings when you don’t feel like you should, if you’re mentally not doing ok, don’t feel bad if you need to step back and away from it, forcing yourself will just give you confusing readings.

- Your spirits hide answers from you, one time I asked my spirit guides how life works, and they refused to tell me (and then had a silly moment and told me like 3 months later for whatever reason.)

- This is not future telling, I cannot tell you what your future will be like, but I can tell you what it might be like if you make certain decisions.

- Don’t use tarot to intrude on someone’s personal life, like no sex readings on your ex for the love of God.

- If a reading doesn’t resonate with you, remember what it said and then come back to it to see if it does now, an example of this was when someone gave me a past life reading that didn’t match up until I reversed it and realised that I was the second person in the reading, rather than the main.

- Have fun with readings, it shouldn’t feel like a chore.

- Allow yourself to make mistakes, that’s the only way you will improve.

- Be patient, don’t think you will know everything about tarot after like 1 week of learning it.

- There’s always more to learn when it comes to tarot, you will never have enough knowledge.

- You can buy yourself decks, even your first one. You don’t need to have another person buy it for you.

I hope you enjoyed this! It took me an hour to write up lmao, but I had fun.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA/WIBTA for checking up on my abusive ex's current partner?

Everyone involved here is in our mid 20s and knew each other in real life.

🎑🎑🎑

I recently broke up with and then cut off my ex, for a whole realm of reasons that I won't get graphic about, including but not limited to emotional manipulation, borderline assault, faking a medical scare, threats against my life, endangerment, stalking, etc. The relationship was quite honestly pretty traumatic and it put me in a bad mental place that I'm only just now, months later, starting to crawl back out of with the help of therapy and a good support network. My Ex had another partner, who would really go to the ends of the Earth to defend my Ex. They were together for far longer than me and my ex (a few years or longer), and the two of them live together. When I was dating my ex, I got the vibe that the two of them were on shaky ground, but I had mostly chalked that up to me being in the picture and causing some tension, because they had apparently never fought and had been together for a long time beforehand. My Ex would also try to subtly pit the two of us against each other a lot, and as a result we weren't really friends, and any time the two of us would voice similar concerns my Ex would make a big deal about us "ganging up" on them, so we typically didn't talk about our dirty laundry with each other. When me and my Ex parted ways, even before we cut each other off completely, said partner blocked me completely and made it very clear that I was not to ever contact them, and I likewise blocked them. Looking back on shit, I feel really bad about how I treated my Ex's partner. For a while I continued to receive messages from them (from sockpuppet accounts, but I knew it to be them) defending my Ex after I cut them both off, but these messages always felt a little off, like they were defending my Ex to themselves more than they were to me. Eventually I caved and figured that if they were content violating my boundaries to check up on me and keep sending me messages, I was in my right to check up on them. So I did. Apparently my Ex and this partner are still going through a rough patch, because the partner has been posting a lot of personal accounts of abuse strikingly similar to what I went through, alongside what seems to be sexual coercion as well. I feel disgusted, and part of me wants to reach out, but part of me knows it wouldn't do any good right now because they're still very defensive of my Ex, and they kind of see me just as a blatant villain who just hates my Ex. But at this point, I know I'll probably keep checking in periodically, mostly because I feel guilty for how I treated this person and I also know that they have NO support network outside of their current (abusive) relationship. I also just wanna make sure this person doesn't off themselves or something, really, and I want to be prepared to jump in if I need to. I know this "isn't my problem" but I'm probably taking it upon myself anyway all things considered. So, with that said, does that make me the asshole? Am I being a piece of shit for checking this person's socials after they blocked me, even though they did the same to me? etc.

[night-market-if]

Hello Zinnia, I'll make this quick since I myself am not in what one could call a "good mood" but I saw your post regarding people complaining about your story. Believe me when I say I know _very_ well the types of entitlement crying that goes around since I am also a writer. But listen to me when I say(or I suppose, read since you aren't using a screen-reader?) fuck them. TNM is your story, write it how *you* want to. People don't like it? Find something else to read. K bye & I love Belladonna!

I'm getting there. I really am. And normally, I am like that as well. Cancer has unfortunately taken its toll on my mental health. No, I do not have it. A family member does. And I think my mental fortitude against harsh words maybe isn't as strong as it used to be. And that's okay. I'll get back to looking at those kinds of messages eventually and rolling my eyes at them. Right now, it's just made me not want to write. But I am actively trying to work through it by writing things for myself first. And hopefully that works.

But yes. Fuck them is the attitude I want to get back to.

Thank you so much for sending me these words. It made me smile.

[mingos]

*crawls out of the ground like a mole, coughing up copious amounts of dirt*

so, hello.

    i try to keep things as vague & light as possible when referencing my homelife because, honestly, the last time i brought up anything tangentially related i was essentially told “you being upset is making other people upset and ruining the fun” so being anything other than ✨chaotic positivity gremlin wilder ✨ here makes me paranoid, hence why i’ll just disappear for weeks sometimes. 

but. 

i’ve clearly been gone for a bit, will probably be gone for a bit longer, and since i’ve been getting messages from folks wanting to check in on me i wanna give a more detailed update than usual. i feel guilty for not responding directly, but for reasons i can’t get detailed on other than “the idea of having a conversation with 99.9% of people right now is terrifying” (is this what being nonverbal is, chat?) with even the .1% being a super recent development, a queue post into the void is my solution.

i won’t get that detailed, but if light references to domestic abuse, addiction, or just family issues in general are hard subjects for you - nothing past this paragraph is too pertinent anyway, so don’t worry about having to stop. all you gotta know is that some Bad Stuff with family happened, but i’m safe & i’ll be back in maybe another week or something. 

anyways. i was living out of hotels for about 3 weeks. 

more like 16-17 days if you want to get technical because 4 of those days i had an actual scheduled hotel for my twin’s wedding at the end of august - but i’ve basically been bouncing around since august 21st. the night of the 20th, i had a horrific fight with my family member and, for the first time ever, i left. don’t know if would call it brave on my part - since we were leaving for a trip anyway, this is just the first time my suitcase was already packed.

right now, i’ve been at another relative’s house since the 11th. i tried to go back on the 1st because, even after years of this, i’m apparently way too easy to convince everything is going to be fine…  but by the 2nd i was out of there again. 

currently mulling over my next move here because, as much as the common sense answer is to stay away, anybody who’s unfortunate enough to deal with this knows how complicated it is. i’m scared for this person’s safety as much as i am for my own. no one else really checks on them, and i’ve already had to deal with several medical emergencies they’ve had like bad falls & breathing problems. i don’t like leaving them alone for long because the guilt at the thought of something bad happening to them and no one knowing for possibly days or weeks eats me up.

i logically know i’ll have to get past that eventually because i can’t let my life be dictated by this incredibly toxic cycle forever or i’ll never be happy, but now isn’t the time. they also have a dog who would similarly be put at risk if something happened to them, so it’s a lot for me to worry about.

but, having said all that, we’re currently in the apology stage or i guess the negotiation stage because, after the shit that happened this time, i’m making it perfectly clear i’m not stepping foot in that house until they do something. detox, treatment, rehab, disulfiram, soberlink, therapy – something. we’re kind of running out of things for them to try at this point, but at least they used to try. they haven’t really been doing that this past year and I’m the one suffering the most because of it.

so yeah, that’s where things are at the moment. i’m mentally not doing so hot - but I’ve got my dog, and being able to sleep in a bed i’m familiar with for a change and not a hotel (I spent so much money on hotels, guys i’m cooked) is nice relief while I wait out whatever the hell is happening. talking to them over the phone again pretty much drains any of the energy I’ve got back, but it sounds like they’re starting to "get it' so hopefully they’ll start to take this seriously again because I can really only take one more year of this (if even) until I just need to accept these things aren’t my responsibility and move on.

honestly, having a close-knit group of friends/support system for the first time in years has really reminded me of that and given me the confidence to take a lot of steps to live for myself for a change, and to think about prioritizing my own happiness for once, which wasn’t the place i was in at this time last year, or the year before that, or the year before that - so I just want to say thank you again to anyone whose ever helped talk me through something or really just been nice to me at all. this is why i always remember to be kind because it can genuinely do a lot for someone going through something, because i know it has for me.

anyway uhhhhh i hope you are all doing well, and with any luck i’ll be chilling on here by the start of october. can’t miss spooky month and this insufferable pink bird’s birthday, after all.

much love.

[writingseaslugs]

Heartslabyul Romance Headcanons

Hello! So I decided to do a series for Twisted that are my takes on how they are as romantic lovers! I’m going in order of dorms and writing SFW and NSFW headcanons for each and every single character (Ortho gets an SFW one, but it’s not romantic). This is to help me familiarize myself with the characters.

I'm on book 6 (just started) but when I wrote 90% of these headcanons I was barely through book 2 and going off character vignettes. I went through and changed some things though so they aren't too OOC. Also uh, I will be linking each part but I might honestly forget so if you don't see links to all the dorms by the end of the week then just assume I forgot and drop me an ask of DM so I can do that. I'll also be making a masterlist later on.

Disclaimer: All characters in this series are aged up. For more information about my version of this world and the type of reader you can expect, please do a quick read of THIS post. No beta, I die like the idiot I am.

Heartslabyul (You're Here) | Savanaclaw | Octavinelle | Scarabia | Pomefiore | Ignihyde | Diasomnia

Romantic Headcanons

Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle is wholly thrown for a loop when it comes to romantic gestures. Completely inexperienced in the ways of romance and without much reference for how a functioning relationship works at home, the boy is confused.

Expect it to be a while after he realizes he likes your company far more than he thought. At first, he’ll think it’s just that he likes you since you tend to keep Adeuce in check for him when he can’t, but it’ll click for him eventually.

After he figures it out, he’ll decide from afar if you’d be interested. Eventually asking to take you to tea parties with just the two of you, and being the one to personally extend the invitation to unbirthday parties. Going so far as giving you the first slice of a tart (something that will make everyone in Heartslabyul mentally screams because at this point it’s too obvious).

He’s the kind of person who will write you a letter, requesting your presence after classes one day to confess. He’ll be very composed, having rehearsed the lines and coming up with all possibilities. If you accept, he’ll probably have a gentle blush on his face and ask if you’d like to have some afternoon tea with him over at the dorm.

He is a gentleman and will put your needs first. Don’t expect to just be able to vent to him about anything though. He will give solutions assuming it’s what you’re seeking out. If you want to vent you have to spell it out to him that you’re not looking for solutions.

His love language is taking care of his significant other. Whether that means they’re eating properly, getting to bed on time, or are mentally well. He’s always sending you good morning and good night messages to make sure you don’t oversleep/stay up too late. If you ever message him at one in the morning though, expect a reply back in a scolding fashion. He has his ringer on for you and you only, so he’ll wake up to the messages and be disappointed you haven’t slept yet.

He’s not one for PDA, at all. The most you’ll get out of him is linking your pinkies together as he walks you to class. He’s still awkward with the whole relationship thing and would rather not do anything scandalous.

Behind closed doors, he’s far more pliable with physical touch but tries not to go overboard. He’s still new to the relationship aspect and would appreciate it if you didn’t randomly sit on his lap while he’s trying to read. Simply sitting side by side with your legs touching will have to suffice for a while. Not that he doesn’t want to be closer to you, he just doesn’t want to rush anything. He’s a gentleman after all, and he will be courting you slowly.

The dates you can expect from Riddle is going out for tea (obviously) but also study sessions where he’ll teach you about more advanced topics to help you. He’ll also help you “cheat” since he knows the curriculum, has gone through it and will know what to have you study for those pesky pop quizzes. He won’t go overboard with you on the studying through, if you want to stop, he will and suggest something else (perhaps a walk through the gardens to get rid of the stuffy air of the library?).

The biggest downside of going out with Riddle is having to follow rules. Riddle can’t have his significant other breaking every single rule of his dorm and undermining him. While he’s not super strict and he doesn’t “punish” you as he would the others, he still expects you to respect the rules and try to follow the ones you know. When you get closer in your relationship he will get a little bit more lenient, and on occasion have him break rules (like curfew for example, who doesn’t want to go on a stroll and explore the stars when the campus is silent?).

Trey Clover

When it comes to Trey, it’s genuinely hard to know if he likes you. He’s always been polite with you, only occasionally teasing you and pulling simple pranks, but that’s how he treats everyone in his dorm. You have to really pay attention to him to see the special treatment he reserves just for you.

The genuine laugh he has, how his eyes sparkle when he looks at you, the subtle way he will touch your shoulder or graze your hand when giving you something. How he lets his guard down a little more around you, how he compliments your actions. Those are all the little things you have to look for when dealing with Trey. He doesn’t just outright say he likes you, but rather shows you through his actions.

When it finally clicks in your head he’s giving you special treatment, Trey is probably going to notice. Almost like an “It’s about time” sorta thing. The advancements after that will be a lot less subtle, almost teasing until your head is spinning. Honestly, he’d prefer it if you were the one to confess first. He leaves you no room for doubt about his feelings towards you, but he doesn’t want to make it awkward if he confesses and you’re not interested. You’re going to have to be the one to step up.

Once you two are finally going out, don’t expect the almost “Big Brother” persona to falter. He’s still going to be taking care of you but in far more teasing ways. He’s not going to be trying to get you to wake up early or go to bed at a decent hour, he’s not your mother, but he will make sure you’re doing okay. Expect him to check in with you between classes to make sure you’re fine.

Study dates are a must. He’s normally helping out the others in his dorm, so he’ll always try to get you to join him. He’ll also be keeping you well after the studying sessions so it’ll just be the two of you together. Expect that 90% of your homework will be done in his dorm room. Whether you guys are talking, helping one another out, or just doing your work silently. He likes those moments where it’s just the two of you.

He’s going to be baking you your favorite things. Don’t be surprised when he begins asking what your favorite kinds of foods are, especially sweets. If you don’t have a sweet tooth, he’ll make more savory desserts. He’ll bring them to Ramshackle, always with some tuna or a snack for Grim so he leaves your stuff alone.

If you’re willing to help him when he’s baking, or even just chilling in the kitchen with him, he’ll be over the moon. Baking is something that has a calming effect and sometimes he just wants to make something for no reason. If he can show you a thing or two, all the better. If you have no interest in baking, then just chill and talk with him while he’s there. Waiting for things to bake in an oven can get boring if there isn’t other prep work to be done, so having you there is nice.

He’s not much for PDA either, preferring those things to be exclusive between you two. He is a bit more open to it, holding your hand in public is something he has no problem with. Giving you a kiss on the forehead, cheek, or back of the hand is another thing he doesn’t mind doing. If he happens to be taller than you, it’s easy to make him melt by placing your hand on the back of his head and pulling him down for a quick peck on the lips.

He does enjoy getting a rise out of you. Expect him to tease you a lot with romantic gestures. Leaning in close during study dates and thinking he’s going to kiss you? Nope, he just happened to see a pen he wanted to use on the other side of you. He loves seeing your cheeks flare up, and it’ll be up to you if you drag him by his lapels for a proper kiss after. He’ll always laugh against your lips after and murmur about how easy it is to fluster you before leaning back in for a kiss.

Trey doesn’t try to break Riddle’s rules. Not because they’re rules, but he’d rather not deal with the lecture about how he’s Vice Warden and should be held up to higher standards. Still, he’ll break some rules when Riddle isn’t looking. Expect him to show up at Ramshackle past curfew to hang out with you, maybe take you somewhere, or just relax on the couch with you on his lap. He’ll let you play on his phone since you’re technology deprived.

Cater Diamond

When Cater falls for someone, he falls hard. One day you’re just another cute little freshman of his, the next he’s realizing being around you makes his heart speed up. His smile feels more natural and he’s seeking you out more and more. He isn’t shy about it either, the moment he realizes exactly what’s going on, he’s going in full throttle. Be expecting him to visit you in between classes, offer to walk with you, and invite you out places.

Smile for Magicam! Or at least that’s going to be his excuse for snapping photos with the two of you. 90% of those photos are for his eyes only. He’s not going to be creepy and set them as his background until after you’re already going out. Just be expecting him to follow you around like a lovesick puppy when he has time to spare. If you somehow don’t realize that he likes you, he’ll try harder to get it through your thick skull.

He’s pretty natural when it comes to confessions. He doesn’t do anything over the top. Probably just another hang out for you guys, going to some new trending store he heard about, or even a café. While you’re there he’ll comment on how you two would make a pretty cute couple, then ask if you want to be. His heart is going to be pounding like crazy, hoping for the best, and you better be prepared for the cutest smile in the world when you accept.

He’ll be more likely to post photos of the two of you on dates if you’ll allow him. He reserves two photo shooting sessions per date, only lasting maybe five minutes. While social media is important to him, he’d rather be focused on you. The photos more or less are for his own memory bank. He also loves taking candid shots of you. He definitely has a photo of you sprawled on his bed after a long day of classes, mouth open and fast asleep. He won’t comment if you snored, but if you ask he’ll tell you the truth and say it’s endearing.

While he might have a study date or two with you when it’s absolutely necessary, he’d rather be out and about with you. Studying gets boring so you have to really help him get engaged if you two end up doing that. If not, expect to see the newest trending places, get the recently released pastries at bakeries, etc. In fact, he really hopes you have a sweet tooth because he always feels bad buying something for Magicam and then not eating it in the end. If you don’t like sweet either, then he’ll bring it back to the dorm for someone else to have.

He’s totally fine with PDA as long as you’re chill with it. He doesn't want to overstep and make you uncomfortable, but he wants to flaunt you off to the world. A huge show of “This is mine and they’re the best thing in the world.” His hand is always wrapped around your shoulder when you walk places, and he’ll die of happiness if you put your hand in his back pocket while walking.

Cater doesn’t give a damn about rules as long as Riddle isn’t around to punish him. This means you two will have a lot of sneaking around to do in order to not get in trouble. Certain events are way past curfew, but he can’t just go. Don’t tell Riddle, but he gave him a side Magicam account to follow so Riddle can’t see all his outings that break rules. Riddle is none the wiser and he’d rather keep it that way.

You’re gonna need a phone. If Crowley isn’t going to give you one early on, Cater freaking will. He needs someone to message during class who won’t scold him for being distracted. He’ll also set you up with your own Magicam account so he can tag you. Whether you ever post on it or not, he doesn’t care. He just wants to be able to tag his amazing significant other.

It’s canon that his older sisters tend to give him a lot of ‘cutesy’ stuff that he’s not a fan of. He’s more than happy to give you stuffed animals if you’re into that sort of thing. In fact, anytime he gets a package he’s going to call you over and ask what you want to take from it. Don’t feel bad, he legit doesn’t want any of it. He’ll take photos for Magicam so his sisters don’t get upset, but after he’s handing them all off to you. If his sisters ever find out, expect the packages to now be sent to Ramshackle. They aren’t playing games. If he’s going to give them to you anyway, then they might as well personalize them to your taste. The packages end up becoming twice the normal size as well.

Kisses. Be expected to have a lot of them. Cater literally can’t keep his hands to himself, and needs to show his S/O with affection. So hand kisses, cheek, forehead, they’re all fair game. If he sneaks up behind you, expect his arms to be wrapped around your waist and a kiss to be placed on the back of your neck. Yes, he will do this if you’re speaking to someone else and he wants your attention. Yes, he absolutely adores how flustered you get as well.

Ace Trappola

Ace? Liking you? Romantically? Fun concept, wrong guy. Or at least that’s what he’s going to tell himself on repeat for literal weeks after he figures it out. He’s tried the whole dating thing before, and it wasn’t his cup of tea. Not to mention you were his close friend, and he didn’t want to ruin that by going on boring dates and then ghosting you. He couldn’t ghost one of his friends. So he decided he was just going to pretend like he didn’t like you romantically and carry on like normal.

Sadly this is easier said than done. You don’t even try to do anything flirty with him. You two will just be messing around and your hand grazes against him and his mind is wandering. “Wow, their hand felt kinda nice, I wonder what it would be like if they let me hold it?”. Queue him going into denial and trying to escape the situation. It isn’t hard to figure out that there’s something going on there.

You’re going to have to be the one to put on the first move. Start inviting him out on platonic, friendship dates. Watch him enjoy himself and do things that are just on the cusp of what a cute couple would do. Get him into the mindset that no, it’s not boring to date someone. In fact, your significant other should indeed be one of your closest friends. Ace will finally realize that his mistake last time was going out with someone he didn’t know much about and never actually bonded with. Just someone who liked him and he thought was pretty. Once it clicks that dating could be fun and nothing would change, he’s singing a new tune.

It’ll still take some time before he finally confesses to you though. His next worry is “Wait…what if I’m misinterpreting this entire thing and we’re just really close friends and they don’t think of me like this?” Thankfully his blunt nature will win over eventually. He’s just one day going to outright ask if you want to start dating. He’s killing himself with all this doubt and it’s cramping his style. Either say yes and begin dating, or say no and he just pretends this whole thing never happened. You’re gonna say yes. How could you not?

Give him some time to traverse through this newfound territory. He’s going to get a bit of whiplash as he realizes the things he’s been wanting to do with you, he can now do them. His hand is going to find yours. Kissing? New favorite activity. Expect him to drag you somewhere private between classes for quick make-out sessions. He loves the feeling of your lips on his, it reminds him that you guys are beyond the friendship phase now.

He’s a bit more handsy now that you two are officially together. He is constantly instigating physical contact with you, even if your face goes red in public. He’s going to be laughing and teasing you for it. He’s another one to tease you with lingering touches and almost kisses that turn out to be him leaning forward to grab something. Drag him in for a kiss and he might apologize (he won’t).

Expect him to also be treating you like his friend still. Sure he can kiss and hug you whenever, but he still wants what you guys had before. Best of both worlds, really. Hanging out in your group with Grim and Deuce and just messing around. Getting into trouble is still one of his favorite activities to do with you. However, detentions are now significantly more entertaining since he makes you flustered during them.

He’s going to be showing up at Ramshackle unannounced all the time. Always under the guise of Riddle being pissed off at him (which sometimes is true if the collar around his neck is anything to go by). Just get used to it and always be prepared for him to tease you about sharing the bed at night. He’s going to have to fight Grim over the fact. It’s a known fact that you and Grim cuddle at night on the same bed (after all, the first few nights at Ramshackle it was the only habitable bed). If he does share a bed with you, expect Grim to be right in the middle, kicking Ace in his sleep.

He’s going to make you late for class, this there’s no doubt. He’ll always want to sleep in if he’s already with you in bed. The only way to get his lazy butt up in the morning is to kick him off the bed. Even Grim is up before him, which is saying something. Make some coffee though and he’ll spring right up. His dorm is all about tea, so the bean juice is a special treat he really only gets when he spends the night at your place.

Late-night calls. If he’s not at the dorm, be expecting mass text messages until one in the morning. You might have to put your phone on “Do Not Disturb” if you want any sleep. How he can stay up so late at night and be hyperactive during the day is beyond you. No wonder he sleeps like a rock. He does get a bit cuter in his messages the later into the night it gets. It’s the only time he’ll be telling you how much you mean to him and how pretty/handsome you are. A tired Ace is a more honest version.

Deuce Spade

Deuce is going to be the only one in the dorm who differs when it comes to whether his crush identifies as a female compared to a male or any other gender. He respects women but is far more flustered. So it’s going to take some time even for the friendship aspect to sink in if he knows you’re a female. If you’re male or identify as something else, he’ll be easier to talk to and approach. He eventually will warm up completely though once he realizes there’s really no difference when it comes to friendships, he just won’t try to rough-house with you unless you instigate it first.

When he realizes he has a crush, it’s obvious to literally everyone. Unless you’re super dense, you’re going to notice the moment he realizes it. The way his entire body tenses as you guys are hanging out and how he looks at you. You’d think you were the one who put the moon and stars in the sky with the look he gave you that day when it dawned on him. After that he’d get flustered a bit more, not knowing how to deal with his emotions.

His mother figures it out instantly. Whenever they’re on call and she asks him questions about school and he brings you up, it’s like the air shifts around him and through a phone it’s palatable. It took her a total of five seconds to know her son had it down bad and bring the conversation to that. Yes, he got all the good courting advice from his mother. Ace tried to help, but the boy doesn’t know much about romance so? Trey was a bit more help, but in this case, his mother really came through.

You’d have to thank Ms. Spade at a later date. When Deuce showed up at your front doorstep with a bouquet of flowers in his dorm uniform, you were blown away. He was a blushing mess but clearly needed to get it off his chest. Over some tea, he confessed and you accepted without hesitation, how could you not? The boy is sweet and we all know he will treat you right.

He’ll be clumsy as he navigates the new territory of your relationship. A lot of coaxing is needed at first. Take things very slow with him, go on dates and act like friends. Maybe convince him to hold your hand at some point. You will actually break him if you go straight for a kiss on the lips. On the cheek is more his pace until he’s braver around you. Let him be the one to kiss you first, it’ll be well worth it.

He’s not going to be taking part in PDA, it’s a bit too embarrassing as a model student in the making, he didn’t want to accidentally break rules. If you keep teasing him, he will scoop you up into his arms and take you somewhere private so you two can be alone. He will be blushing like mad the entire time while muttering under his breath how you’re going to kill him.

During school breaks, he’s going to invite you to his place. You can bring Grim along, of course, he just wants his mother to meet you (she’s been begging since she heard the good news, and probably is already planning for a wedding). His mother will love you no matter what. If you were ever deprived of motherly love growing up, be prepared to cry into this woman’s arms. She’ll treat you like one of her own. Also, you’re leaving with her contact information and she’s expecting a call once a week to check in on you. Dating Deuce means getting another mom.

Once Deuce is finally comfortable around you, you can expect him to be cuddling with you often. Just sitting you in his lap while you two work on school stuff. Please help this boy study and dumb it down for him. He’s slow at learning but he CAN learn. He’ll be forever grateful and probably be apologizing when he realizes you guys have been studying well past curfew and he’s going to be in trouble with Riddle (explain to the warden what you guys had been doing and help bring Deuce’s grades up and he’ll overlook you guys being out past curfew).

Blastcycling. He’s getting you a helmet and the moment he has his bike, he’s taking you for joy rides. Probably going to be showing you all his favorite places to drive to for some peace and quiet. Stopping at the edge of a forest after an intense riding session, your hair is a mess, and you’re sitting on the edge with his arm wrapped around you watching the sunset. You can expect dates like these. Deuce is secretly a romantic and will adore moments like these with you.

With friends, he’s more likely to treat you in a friendly way. He doesn’t want things to get awkward in the group by being all lovey-dovey but expect after hangouts for him to steal you away for some alone time. He’s also going to be way more protective over you once you two are going steady. Nobody messes with you unless they want Deuce’s delinquent side to come out and physically fight them. He also apologizes when he shows you that side, but it’s just another part of Deuce and you love him for it.

[hell-drabbles]

Someone made a WHB au where if Solomon's descendant didn't need devils essence to survive but rather they could eat angels instead and now I can't stop imagining Embittered Companion choosing to eat angels instead of fucking demons

I don't know if this rule would apply to God Fragment Companion,like would they need demon essence?

But let's just say they do,I do imagine they could just eat the angels formed by their wings while their in a hungry semi lucid state and I also imagine the false angels wouldn't mind

In fact Companion's behaviour influences the false angels and sometimes when Companion is hungry the False angels act like a pack of hyena or piranha and tear eachother apart

Like a group of them just dog pile eachother like piranha or a pack of hyenas swarming their prey

And it's just a gruesome scene of this wiggling mass of white bodies and feathers fluttering around and spurts of blood and the sound of breaking bones and ripping flesh as the False Angels tear eachother or their weakest member apart to satiate Companion's hunger

My brain juice is coming back

I go M.I.A for a bit and end up coming back with a lot of new random ideas

I do this all the time sorry

Dante Anon

No need to worry, I too have low mental stamina. I want to talk but ough I'm so tired all the time. I see the inbox messages but my fingers won't let me type. I get very tired, so easily. I am burning with ideas all the time, if only my mental stamina could keep up with it! Anyways. Let me add onto this fun idea.

This is just my kinks showing up so don't mind me.

Hmm honestly, I would assume that this version of the Companion doesn't need to consume demon essence, but oh well.

I want one of those angels to have been taken away and locked up deep in whatever Heaven prison facility they got. This fake angel was crafted when the Companion was in the worst pit of self loathing, so this fake angel was created with the task to kill the Companion. That is it's goal, its purpose for its creation. But, obviously, the other angels come in, capture this being and locked it far away. They can't kill these fake angels, because they received the order to stop killing each other in the Companion's name. It's unsightly, disgusting, I don't want it.

This, of course, stretches to the Companion's angels. So they can't kill this particular one.

And whenever these strange angels go into a feeding frenzy in an attempt to sate the Companion's appetite, God's angels come in and collect the heads of those eaten angels and help them regrow all their body mass. So you just have a sci-fi facility filled with fake angel heads floating in those classic liquid chambers.

Hey, wouldn't that make for a neat side-story? Where the fake angel that's trying to kill the Companion ends up being the first one to develop a consciousness, and it goes through the facility with those fake angel heads and is confronted by God's angels that question why this fake angel wants to kill what created it. Do you not love the Companion? Worship their very being? You're lucky that we can't kill you, but we will take you apart and seal you away.

And jokes on them, this fake angel is trying to kill them out of love. Of course love is there, its the very core of this purpose. This angel has learned to pray, learned to praise their very precious human qualities outside of the godly ones.

And eventually the purpose goes from "I must kill the Companion," to "I must kill God." As in, "I must kill the shard that forced them to make me, and made them suffer."

[lokavisi]

how did you develop your clairaudience? i have a hard time hearing loki most of the time, and i could use some tips 😭

That's honestly a great question. I will say that I've been intuiting messages for at least a decade and a half at this point. I was doing it before I even knew what that meant while I was a practicing Christian in high school, though certainly not to the degree that I do now, nor with the ability to recognize exactly who I was hearing. (I presumed the Christian God/Jesus, though in all honesty it could have been any number of angels or even just my higher intuition.) So giving yourself time to develop the skill in general is important. It's also because I've spent so much time with Loki that I am able to recognize when it's them coming through as opposed to anyone else. So again, time. I know that's not particularly helpful when you're frustrated in the here and now, but that has been my experience.

In the mean time, here are some the practices that I do/have done that have helped me build this skill:

1. Tarot or oracle card readings (or other divination tools) - This can be a little more useful when you find a deck attuned to a specific being, but is still a good way to get a sense of who you're talking to. When I started using cards I used an Archangel Michael deck, so I knew who exactly my messages were coming from. Then over time I started to get a little bit of a sense of his personality as I intuited a little bit more beyond just the words on the card. When using a more generic deck, ask your questions to the specific being you are trying to hear. Keep a journal of the answers you get when asking questions of that being in particular. The more you practice, the more you can see if there are certain cards or suits that seem to show up a lot for them, which then gives you a sense of how they communicate. I've found that repetition in that practice has lead to hearing more direct messages as expansions of the cards' meanings. (Which in turn has led to less reliance on cards to hear a message. Though they are still very helpful in this regard when I'm experiencing some mental fog.)

2. Intuitive writing - This is what I was doing during my Christian days and didn't realize I was doing it. (At that time I was reading Bible verses and intuiting prayers.) Another practice involving journaling, write whatever your question is for the being down. Once you do, write the first words that come to your mind. It might be one word, it might be a full sentence, it might be a whole paragraph. The important this is to not overthink it. Just write down the words. Just like with the cards, the more you do this with the same being, the more you'll start to get a sense of their voice. And eventually, it starts to become automatic writing (directly channeled messages, as opposed to intuited). By the time I was working with Loki I was already able to intuit a sentence in response to anything. Now, after spending about 4.5 years with the guy, I can journal full on conversations between us where they use such expansive metaphors it takes up multiple pages of my journal to write. It's exhausting at times lol. This one is easier to doubt when I'm feeling disconnected or unsure of what I'm hearing. It takes a little bit of trust in yourself and the being in question. Though because you're writing it down, you can also go back and refer to previous messages and look for any (in)consistencies that may or may not be present. Anything that seems off might be worth investigating. You can always get confirmation from a tarot card about the message being conveyed if you're really not sure.

3. Put yourself in situations/around people that practice channeling/possessory work - I know this might be challenging depending on where you live and what's available, but the more you see people at work the more you can pick up on the energy of who they're hearing/channeling. For example, I attended a seidr/spae ritual a couple of years ago where two different seers were respectively possessed by Loki and Odin. I had experience with the two of them prior to this ritual, but it felt SO different feeling their energy so present and concentrated in a particular place in front of me (i.e. the seers). As I said, I already had experience with them, so their energy wasn't unfamiliar, but it was much more intense that it's been much harder to mistake it for anyone else in my personal workings thereafter. Besides needing to know people around you who can do the work, there is also the caveat of making sure those workers are legitimate. This is a much less feasible way to build up the skill, but it can be a great supplement to the practices mentioned above whenever you might be able to do so.

I hope this was of some help. It's hard for me sometimes to explain how things work for me in relation to clairaudience because I feel like things just start to happen, even though I do things (like the tarot and writing) to build that skill and connection.

Also, sorry it's taken me a minute to respond. I failed to receive a notification. -_-

[mothertoall2]

Loose Threads (Marvel AU)

Chapter 1: Perfect Life

Description: In a marvel alternate universe Vision was killed during the Thanos battle leaving a grieving pregnant Wanda. (Natasha survived, and also Reader is an Avenger) Reader was there to help Wanda through it and raised the twins, and eventually married Wanda. Twelve years after the battle Tony found a way to bring back those who were lost. What will happen when Wanda is stuck between Reader and Vision? And what about Readers best friend who has strong opinions about Wanda?

Warnings: None

Y/n's POV

I am awoken from my slumber by feeling of someone moving my hair out of my face. I open my eyes to see the one person I've grown to love the most. I smile at her to receive a smile in return. "Good morning lovey." Her voice is laced with a hint of her Sokovian accent. "Good morning miss Y/l/n." She gives me a small kiss but I lean up to kiss her a few more times before full sitting up.

"So how long do you think we have this time?" She asks moving to lay in my lap. "Hmmm I'd give it two minutes." She shakes her head and looks at her phone. "Not that soon, give it at least six." I smile at her as she moves my hand to her hair and I start scratching her head softly. "I'll bet you dinner and dishes tonight that it'll be two." We shake on it and check the time, it's 7:18. I grab my phone from the night stand and check my notifications, I don't see a reply from Natasha which is strange cause she read my message but before I can start thinking anymore into it i hear footsteps running into the room.

The door crashes open and in come the two 3 year olds. Wanda sits up as they jump onto the bed and I lay down to pretend to be asleep. "Good morning my loves!" Wanda greets them but they jump straight over to me and shake me. "O'pa wake up it's morning!" Tommy says loudly and Billy starts to jump on the bed next to me.

"Moooooom make O'pa wake up!" Tommy pouts at Wanda as she rolls her eyes. I sit up quickly and grab the twins in my arms and start tickling them. They start screaming and giggling trying to get me to let go. Once they escape they run to hide behind Wanda who just smiles. "Hide us mama O'pa is meeeean!" Billy whines while Tommy sticks his tongue out at me. "So who won miss protector?" Wanda shakes her head and mouths some profanity at me while I laugh and stand up.

Before I can walk away Tommy jumps into my arms and Billy jumps onto my back. "TRAIN RIDE!!" They both shout and I start making train sounds as I swerve them back and forth all the way down the stairs and to the kitchen. I place Billy in his chair and Tommy in his and scoot them both in. "Alright what do the little cuties want for breakfast we have Pancakes, Waffles, Toast, and eggs?" I ask them as I digit with the wedding band on my finger.

"PANCAKES!" They shout together and I can't help but grin at their antics. I really do love these kids so much, I feel like a parent to them since I've practically raised them since they were born. I have always been here when Wanda needed a break or a mental day or when she had missions. That's why I'm their O'pa and I'm so so proud to be. "Pancakes it is, now go play while I get them ready." They run off smiling and giggling to the living room. I start grabbing the flour, eggs, milk, and everything else I need the pancakes. As I'm mixing all my ingredients I feel a pair of arms wrap around my waist. I immediately smile and place my hands on hers as I lean back into her hold. "Hello my love." She whispers into my neck which tickles a little, I turn to face her and wrap my arms around her neck. 

I kiss her softly and lean back in to kiss her again until I am repeatedly kissing her. She laughs and hides her face in my neck leaving soft kisses there. I will never get tired of holding her in my arms, these mornings mean everything to me. Her kisses get longer and a bit sloppier as things turn a bit spicy. I felt her start to leave a hickey so I pull away and smack her shoulder softly. "Babe you can't do that the kids are in the other room!" She groans and puts her head on my chest and speaks. "I can't help that you look attractive doing everything, besides it's only a tiny mark, what's the harm?" I shake my head at head at her and go back to cooking.

After breakfast I go upstairs to shower and get ready while Wanda gets the boys dressed. I styled my hair and put on some baggy jeans with a Scooby Doo shirt. Once I'm ready with my sneakers I go out to get the stuff we need from the store for a surprise for the boys. I get home and the boys are playing while Wanda is filing mission reports on the couch. I walk up behind her to give her a kiss on the cheek and cross my arms over her chest. "Hello my dearest wife!" 

"Hi baby, did you get the stuff?" I nod my head and walk over to the boys and sit in front of them. "Hi O'pa wanna play?" Billy holds out one of the figures to me. "I would love to buddy but actually me and mom have a surprise for you boys." The boys jump up and start shouting out questions on what the surprise is before Wanda gets them to settle down. "Do you remember how you have been begging us to get you a pet?" They both start screaming and jumping which forces Wanda to once again calm them.  "Do you guys want to see what it is?" She asks them and they nod quickly. 

I grab their hands and bring them over to the dining room table that held two circular cages, sand and rocks, small bowls, hermit crab food, paint, two shells, and paint. The boys go running to the chairs and look into the box at the creatures that immediately retreat back into their shells.  "We are going to paint their shells for when they grow out of the small ones." Tommy reaches in and picks one up and tries to look inside at the hermit crab. "There is brushes and paint here and make sure you paint over the newspaper please boys." Wanda instructs while we sit on either side of the boys. They start squeezing out paint to start on the shells.

Sometime about half an hour later Wanda's phone rings and she steps out to take the call while Billy informs me that he will name his hermit crab shelly. When she steps back in she seems worried. I stand up and bring her over to the living room. "Is everything okay?" I ask her and she shrugs. "I'm not sure, all Tony says is that he needs us in the lab now." Fear starts to rise in me as my mind starts searching for possible explanations. "Okay um I'm sure it's fine, I'll call Yelena and Kate to come watch the kids." She nods and hugs me, I kiss her on the forehead and hug her tight. Everything is fine, it has to be.

A/n- Hi, my apologies it's been a while I promise frequent updates soon, but here it is, I hope you enjoyed it.

[genericpuff]

Do you have any advice on being more confident when talking about your own comic? Whenever I bring up/talk about the fact that I make a comic, I always feel super akward and like I'm just annoying the other person lol(also sorry if you already saw this! I sent an ask earlier but I'm not sure if it went through becuase I used a kaomoji at the end and I never got a little message saying that the ask whent through lol)

I definitely did see your first ask, I've just been working through them as best I can, sorry for the wait :' )

So I don't really have any solid advice because like... frankly I feel like I'm also not great at talking about what I do?? Especially when it comes to my original projects. I know that probably sounds wild coming from me but when I talk about my comics, especially in real life, it does still feel like I'm in high school trying to talk about my hyperfixation with the adults around me haha I used to just gush about the stories I was writing and somewhere along the line I kind of lost that passion, maybe I outgrew those ideas or maybe I became a little jaded from it feeling like no one cared, much like what you described.

I think it really is just a matter of owning it and being true to yourself. Confidence isn't something tangible that you can just gain, it's a habit you have to form. I heard a saying once that stuck with me: confidence isn't the answer to the question, "Will they like me?", it's simply finding peace in, "If they don't like me, that's okay. I am enough." And that extends to your work.

If it means you have to fake it till you make it, then so be it - like I mentioned above, it's a habit, not a sudden transformation. You will go through times where it's hard, where you don't feel confident in yourself, but what matters is eventually getting back up and continuing on.

Surrounding yourself with others who have the same goals as you can also be super helpful. I have communities I'm in made up of other creatives, comic artists, etc. and that makes for a great support circle of people who know the struggle and can offer support. We deserve to have ourselves uplifted by the people in our lives, not brought down.

Personally speaking, I'm not even working on my original projects currently, I'm hoping to get them back on track over the winter but it's been hard on me mentally because I know I'm gonna be returning to a piece of work that doesn't get much engagement out of a few people who have stuck around, which has been something I've been struggling with for years now. I'm trying to be both positive and realistic with what I can handle, what I want to put up with, and what exactly I want to get out of what I'm putting in. I want to regain that confidence I used to have in the stuff I do, talk about it with the same passion I used to, even if things don't turn out the way I hope.

So yeah, I guess let's try and be more confident together :' )

[yallemagne]

This year, I'm not doing Dr*cula D*ily

Or any other substack but DD is the biggest. I have numerous reasons for this decision that none of y'all are gonna particularly care for, but ya know, just so we got our expectations in order: I'm not gonna participate in DD this year (maybe never again), I'm probably not gonna reblog many posts related to it (doing so would be counterintuitive), but I am holding myself to finishing Orice (at LEAST the base fic).

Now, why?

TL;DR: Mental health crisis brought on by internet harassment and overprioritizing social media. It's not fun anymore, folks.

DD just... it completely ruined the novel for me.

It was a nice phenomenon, but it took a wrecking ball to my mental health and self-worth. Now, I'm not saying DD's creator personally did something to spite me (or maybe I am, he knows what he did /j), but this whole thing? It wasn't good for me. It was never good. It was sometimes fun, but most of the time it made me want to end it because of thumblr notes.

That's fucking stupid. My life is not worth internet validation. My art is not worthless just because my numbers are not as big as the biggest big shots in the fandom. I'm not a horrible person when other people handle personal disagreements regarding headcanon with defaming rumours and impersonation. But hell! My view of reality was horribly skewed.

A while back, I unfollowed all the gothlit tags I previously followed because 1) Some people (active and popular members of the fandom, mind you, not bots or trolls) were posting honest-to-god name-dropping harassment in the tag because "it's a popular tag so more people will see my callout post" and 2) I reached a point where seeing anything related to the novel on my dash just set me off. It didn't even need to be drama-related anymore. Mentions of the characters, mentions of popular AUs, just the very content of this book became triggering to me, and I really didn't miss the content when it was gone, as sad as that is.

And the kicker? I've come to realize that I probably dislike more things about the novel than I actually like about it. Not only is it tied to some of my darkest moments in recent memory, but it's also just... a book with many flaws that I could go on and on and on about. Sometimes, it straight-up made me furious, like seething mad, and I think I'd rather just be happy. But even when I would try to channel that energy into being happy, I always felt I had to over-clarify or else I’d get bombarded with anonymous messages. If you’ve seen any of my posts from during that time… chances are there is a passive aggressive “btw people can have opposing opinions from you about an old book and it doesn’t give you leave to stone them” or several tags of “#this is a joke #a jooooooke #for the love of god #if y’all don’t stop”. I bet it was as annoying for y’all as it was for me.

P.S. Mutuals/friends, do not worry. Y'all keep doing y'all. I can and will block tags if seeing your posts triggers me. So, I suppose my only request is to properly tag, but I've been saying that from the very start.

I just want to move on to other things.

I took a break for Lent. I needed it terribly. And... not gonna lie? I almost didn't want to return. I never got an itching to just log on and "check in". I very successfully avoided tumb altogether. I came back because "I gotta come back eventually" and also like, this is my main hub where I update when I've written a fic, and ya know... I'm not gonna let toxic fandom bs rule my shit.

During my break, I got back into gaming. More specifically, I started playing Hades again. And listening to Epic the Musical. Aaaand boyyy did that bring me back to my Greek mythology phase. I have a Greek mythos/Hades sideblog btw: @areopagusimp. It's cringe, if you can't tell by the blog name.

Back when I was into Hades game and general Greek mythos, my expectations were so much smaller, but yet, my goals and will to create seemed so much bigger. I made art that no one gave a single solitary shit about (except for my friend), but I was happy. Maybe I'm wearing rose-tinted glasses, but... even if I wasn't as happy then as I remember being... haha at least I wasn't receiving threats and insults in my inbox back then :))). That was the most fun thing about the gothlit fandom. I hope every single chickenhearted angry anon is proud of their behaviour.

But yeah, whatever I end up doing, I’m striving to not let it run me into the ground.

But... What do I do now?

I have so many WIPs (art and writing) for the novel, and it's very disappointing that I didn't get to finish them before it all turned sour. Hopefully, I can still finish them, it just won't be with the same distress I worked with before. Hopefully, I can post that stuff and fully manage my expectations, not crash and burn when only a few people like it. Because hell! A few people liking my stuff? That's amazing, really. I shouldn't take that for granted. At the same time, I'm setting a boundary for myself. Placing my self-worth into the hands of people who I don't know, who don't know me, and who aren't even paying for the art? I need to stop that. Who the hell is that gonna serve? Absolutely no one.

My number one goal is to finish Orice. It is somehow untouched by my aversion to the novel; it is my safe space. I want to honour it and honour the longtime readers who have stuck with me. It's gonna be hard, but it's gonna be worth it for me.

This feels attention-seeking, and it kinda is. I'm not tagging the main subject and I'm not allowing reblogs because I want this to stay isolated (and hopefully prevent backlash/misunderstandings), but ya know, no matter how much I try to keep this small, I'm still posting it online. But I just feel like I needed to get this off my chest. I don't really owe everyone an explanation, but I want there to be one for my own sake... also it's much easier to generalize and make a post than contact each of my friends/mutuals on here and unload stuff onto them that I'm not sure is too personal or not.

For those of you who are reading: I love y'all. I love the good people I've met through all this mess. I want to keep the good apples, not throw out the whole harvest, alright? Dunno how much you'll care for my art when the subject is different, but... eh. If y'all are willing to try?

[itscharted]

A Dream Is Still A Nightmare pt. 1

Let’s go back to where it all begin…. When we first met the flame was burning but something happened that I nor anyone could control. She was toxic and so was I; but, that never stopped us from interacting with one another. Two Virgos together make a toxic relationship. She’s poison and I am toxic; so, the question is… What makes her poisonous to others and what makes me toxic to others?

I cheated on her and made her feel like she was the only one. Kept telling her lies until I couldn’t lie anymore. So, after a few months I called her up and finally broke down and told her that I was in a relationship with another woman. She started crying and we started arguing and through the flames I kept apologizing, trying to reassure her that I would leave the other woman alone and I kept telling her that I love her. However, she just kept crying and dogging me out until she finally hung the phone in my face. I tried calling her back and she never answered any of my calls but she sent me a long text message explaining her feelings to me and I replied back still telling her that I am sorry for hurting her. She kept sending me text messages so after a while I stopped replying back to her messages and closed my eyes and went to sleep. The next day I received a disturbing message and it was her from mother. Her mother saw the text messages between me and her and told me that she was in the hospital. At first I didn’t believe it and so I called the phone but no answer. After a while her mother told me that she filed a police report because of what I said in the text messages. I didn’t realize what I had wrote. In the mist of saying “I love you” and “I truly am sorry” I told her to go kill herself and she attempted to do so. At this moment in my life, I knew I fucked up. I knew the girl was suicidal because she told me. I didn’t know what to do.

Later that same day I met up with the other woman and we was out shopping, looking for decorations and even though I was physically around her, mentally my mind was somewhere else. It was with her. Wondering if she is okay. Wondering how she is doing. Wondering if am going to jail. So much was going through my mind. Eventually, I left her and headed back to the house. Checking my phone constantly seeing if I received any messages from her. After a few hours another family member texted me and told me that she was okay and that when she get out that she will hit me up and also let me know that no police report would filed. This particular family is her brother and what I said to her is what he has said to his ex girlfriend. So, he knew I only said those mean things to her because I was angry and upset. A few hours go by and my phone rings it’s her. We only talked briefly but for that brief moment I was happy to know that she was okay and that she would be getting out of the hospital soon but I was still mad at myself. I really did loose myself.

The next day she called and we talked with any type of negative words coming from one another mouth. She told me what she had done and the reasons behind it all. Some came from me but others came from what she was going through in her life. Me, personally, I’ve had suicidal thoughts, I thought the world hated me because of all the mistakes I’ve made in life. So, I understood how she felt. After talking for a while we agreed to be just friends and only friends. She understood that I was not going to leave my girlfriend alone and the reasons behind it. The main reason is because she was going through a lot and I made her feel safe, I made her feel happy. I let her know that I care for her and that I wasn’t going anywhere.

A month rolls by and me and my new found friend slash ex-girlfriend ended up talking on the phone one day. She called me to tell me that she met someone and that that the girl ate her out. When she told me that I’m head thinking to myself, “is she really trying to make me jealous or mad?” However, me being me all I said was, “that’s good that you met someone but I really didn’t need to know about her eating you out.” She replied, “I’m sorry, but the thing is I wasn’t feeling it because I would it have been with you.” I was in a state of shock. We had agreed to be friends and nothing more. Her feelings for me were real. This girl really do love me and wants to be with me. The only thing I could do was to come up with a way we could be together and yet I stayed with my girlfriend without breaking her heart. So, I told her that we can be in an open relationship. We can be together and still be able to see other people. At first, she didn’t want to but after persuading her she agreed to do so.

Now it’s February and we haven’t really spent any time together, so, I drove to her apartment to spend time with her. When I got there I have her a hug and a kiss and then we went into her bedroom to watch movies. We ended up watching one movie. As we were watching the movie I laid down on the bed with my head in her lap and as the movie was playing she slid her hand down my shirt and began to rub on my chest, which was enticing me but I continue to watch the movie. Once, the movie was over we started talking and listening to music. After a hour or so we started making out. She was kissing me so passionately and then we began to make love. When she told me she wants to be skin to skin she was not lying. We were having a deep connection sexually. I was Inside of her giving her all of me as she gave all of herself to me. This lasted for a few hours. Once we were done we got up and took a shower together and then laid back down on her bed with her leg on top of mine and her head on my chest. It was perfect.

However, I was still in a whole relationship even after that wonderful experience I finally decided to walk away from it. Even though it took me almost a week to do so. I got back in a relationship with her but after a few weeks we broke it off and I decided to talk to someone else. Even though, I shouldn’t have because she was still in the picture. And so, me and this new girl ended up in a relationship and the way I treated her and respected her was totally different from her. And so, she text me in the middle of the night while I was on the phone with my girlfriend and I responded back to her like an idiot. My girlfriend ended up hanging up the phone and so called her. I told her what was going on and she retaliated but I didn’t care. However, she wanted what I was giving to my girlfriend. The attention, the love, and the dedication.

I don’t know why she loves me and still wants to be with me but this story doesn’t have an ending so far. So this sha’ll be continued.