#also i think it must be terrifying
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jason needs to ominously appear from the shadows more often
#i just think it’s cool when he does#plus he’s completely silent#because ya know#league of assassins and all of that#also i think it must be terrifying#this 6 foot whatever his height is man appearing from no one when you didn’t even hear him apparoaxhinf#amazing#fuck i misspelt approaching so badly#oh well#wait did autocorrect fix it#i’ve gotten so off track#um#jason todd#red hood#batman#dc#batfam
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I can’t stop thinking about Loop. Imagine doing everything, anything, to get out of a traumatic situation but the price is you. Your body is gone, your name is gone, your family doesn’t recognize you, you feel like most of your memories of them are gone too anyway. Suddenly you’re denied your identity. It’s like YOU never existed… and someone else took your place. You, whose biggest fears are forgetting and being forgotten in turn. You, who’s hesitant to change and now you’re forced to. You can’t even really blame anyone else because you did get your wish, right?
It’s explained clearly in the game, but the implications of it just hit me extra hard sometimes. Siffrin is as much of a study of Loop as Loop is of Siffrin. They share(d) their fears too so mal du pays words essentially becoming the truth to Loop is just… 🪨🪨🪨🙁🙁🙁💥💥💥💥
What do you do when all you have is ripped from you, all your worst fears come true, and youre forced to just… come to terms with it?
#isat spoilers#isat loop#2hats spoilers#shaking you by the shoulders#i love siffrin and loop so much#’’wkb’’ consider: i am new and also stupid#yes ive KNOWN but i didint really GET it yk? like how horrifying losing you self is#they make me die#postgame loop makes it hit extra hard bc ppl are partially defined by their experiences#the longer siffrin and loop exist as separate the more they diverge#that must be TERRIFYING. to an extent to both of them#of course they’ll always have many similarities as they started as the same person but like#loop is just despair au siffrin#<- specifying postgame fics that explore loops identity bc canon had them fade out#which i love btw delightful angst i love everyones takes on loop#in stars and time#isat#i think genuinely in Loop’s shoes as someone who’s also hesitant to change: if I didn’t cry 24/7#i’d be clinging into who i was and still want to be in some ways. but as i’d heal i’d probably want to be distinct#like im me and always will be me but i want what i experienced to not be a footnote. i dont want to be a mirror#’’i am who that family loved but im also someone new’’ yk? its so hard to battle with those two opposites of ’’im []’’ & ’’im not YOUR []’
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Honestly I see Jimmy's refusal to put Curly out of his misery less about his weird feelings of envy or his delusions but the fact Curly is all but stated to be a shield to Jimmy from his actions and people seeing the worst in him.
The only characters that Jimmy really interacts with one on one before the crash are Curly and Anya, two individuals he has wildly different relationships with. It's likely that Curly really did most of the talking between them as the pilots and the rest of the crew as staff. They didn't know of Jimmy's more reprehensible behaviors cause they never really had the chance to and Jimmy is subconsciously aware. If they had disliked him more than Anya would have told Swansea earlier or even Daisuke when things got really bad.
It's why he takes the immediate opportunity to blame Curly; He's the shield. He's saved Jimmy's ass more times than he can count and more times than Jimmy would ever admit. Even when he can't really do it anymore, he mentally shields himself from his own faults by putting Curly between them. Letting Curly die puts too much on him because he doesn't know how to function without a safety net.
In the end Curly only lives because Jimmy needs the idea that Curly will inevitably make things better to stay alive, meaning Curly has to live, no matter how much it pains him to do so.
#in short Jimmy doesnt only care about Curly#he only cares about the securtiy that Curly provides him#and i headcanon that the reason he tried to kill everyone is because he knew it was only a matter of time befor Curly realized this wasnt#somethgin benign Jimmy did that he could smooth over but somethign that Curly would repremand and condem him for and take his security away#like yes Curly did not react fast enough or strongly enough to what Anya told him but you could see him showing more concern over it as I d#understand the psychology behind people and more specifically men like Curly as he is hearing something horrible his friend did to someone#he cares about but has less of a bond with. he feels the need to protect his crew as people first and sadly Jimmy is still the person he wa#closest too yet I still think everything happened too fast for Curly to process as would you not grapple with the fact your closest friend#is a monster you must personally deal with? or that he did something so vile to someone else you have become protective over? Would you not#think of the relative power that friend holds and how if you approuch this wrong it could end badly for everyone? He had all these thoughts#but not enough time to think about them. Also how Jimmy was one of the main people in his personal life he felt a need to protect seeing as#he got him this job. Like imagine the one person you are really trying to make good is still bad after everythign and now you have to be th#hand of judgment youve shielded them from for so long like I do not think Curly handeled the initial situation with Anya correctly I dont#think it was the case of him not believing but not really knowing what to do and feel about it as a friend of both parties the captain and#guy going through his own shit and it says so much that he was dealing with all that so well compared to Jimmy who got everyone killed cuz#he thought being captain would be like sitting on the thrown and not emotionally mentally and physically taxing like I cant say Curly is th#best person due to his inaction but he is a good person doing the best with the knowledge and shitty resources he has cuz like also Id just#be terrified that my suicidal and nilihst bestie who clearly has an inferiority complex around me is the copilot who has access to the most#to the most important parts of the ship and the means to kill us all if he feels like him or his security are being threatened like#Anya and Curly just deserved better because they get put through the ringer like just put him in a class to teach him to be less trusting#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing curly#mouthwashing anya#mouthwashing jimmy#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing spoilers
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Iruma Ficlet: Meme
The Netherworld has an Internet, websites, social media, etc.
Eventually, as high schools do, Bablys becomes riddled with the equivalent of the worm meme:
Would you love me if I was a human?
Iruma… does not participate.
He listens, closely. He watches when others ask it, watches the shape of the word ‘human’ around their lips and the face they make with it. He watches the faces of the responders and memorizes their answers. Despite himself, he ends up making mental lists— lists titled maybe okay (laughter/maybe/I’d find a safe place for you/we can be humans together),
and maybe not (no/how would loving a human even work??/ew gross),
and definitely not.
(Sure I’d love you… for dinner!)
Iruma does his best not to let it all bother him, the questions, or the reactions, or the places various classmates and teachers have on his new lists.
He fails.
Iruma does not ask the question. Of anyone.
.
Someone scrapes together enough nerve to ask Balam-sensei in the middle of Iruma’s class. The teacher freezes.
Someone else takes the moment to cut across that Balam-sensei would eat them and write research on what they tasted like; Balam goes pale.
A third demon says Balam-sensei wouldn’t eat them, since it’d be like eating an endangered species. He’d probably keep them in a jar like a pet. Balam-sensei’s hands begin to shake.
He finally interrupts. And doesn’t look at Iruma. “I’d keep you safe,” he says. “I’d fight my hardest to keep you safe. Of course. You are my students.”
Balam-sensei gets teased by the class and his coworkers for how soft he is for the rest of the week. The next time they have tea, Iruma doesn’t even give a cursory squirm about the hug, and just squeezes back tighter.
.
Ameri does not participate. She serves anyone who does, in her hearing range, a debilitating axe-kick to the chest.
(Those who respond a… certain way receive kicks to the throat.)
People admire her dedication to spending school time on productive tasks and not foolish games.
.
Clara asks Iruma.
Iruma freezes, skin gone pale, hands gone shaky. He can feel his internal defensive beast starting to rise, but he squashes it.
Azz starts to scold her for wasting Iruma-sama’s time on foolish games (he was one of those who admired Ameri’s response), but Iruma doesn’t listen to him. Can’t.
Iruma takes Clara’s hands, gentle, still shaking. “Yes,” he says, immediately, fervently, looking her directly in the eye and all but pushing what he can’t say through his gaze and into her mind. “I’d love you, and Azz, no matter what you were, or what I am, or where we are. There isn’t anything that can change that. Ever.”
#wtdsik#m!ik#good afternoon I was possessed by a plot bunny at work#Suzuki Iruma#Azazel Ameri#Balam Shichirou#Asmodeus Alice#Valac Clara#love trio#iruma kun#thinking about how scared Iruma must still be every day#also the parallels to being queer and closeted and terrified??#people need to catch up with that because I’m not seeing a lotta recognition for it
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buddy is surrounded by horrible horrible adults like at all times and it is deeply stressing to me. not to baby him, i do think he is easily mislead but he is not stupid. but also like. can he be given a moment to breathe actually. can he not be manipulated for one second. please put him in a normal social situation with regular teenagers his age please im begging you
#fantasy high#dimension 20#fhjy#d20#buddy dawn#fantasy high junior year#SLASH LIGHT HEARTED THIS IS NOT A GENUINE COMPLAINT OR ANYTHING#I DIDNT EXPECT TO LIKE THIS CHARACTER AS MUCH AS I DO AND I AM SO WORRIED. IM SO SCARED#i get uncomfortable when people go like “he is just a baby!” because he is a full teenager#like i agree hes being manipulated big time by irresponsible adults around him that dont care about him#but i think its more complicated rhan just “he doesnt know any better!”#but im losing my mind. i think hes being set up as an antagonist for s4 and while#im very excited we get to see more of him im also deeply terrified because i think . he is in danger ?????#bc he is still being influenced by the rage crystal that hasnt been takem out of him + im so scared hes gonna get. killed#i do not think he is evil. i think hes a misguided kid whos having a lot of awful things happen to him#but im terrified i will be proven wrong. buddy please#IM EXCITED TO SEE WHERE THE CLIFFHANGER WILL LEAD TO BUT U MUST UNDERSTAND#IM SO ILL. IM GOING MENTAL. MAD. SICK IN THE HEAD#IM GOING TO MICROEAVE HIM UNTIL HE EXPLODES.
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once again thinking about the worldbuilding in the riordanverse of "names are power" / "belief is power."
The Tri were only able to become immortal through convincing enough people to worship them that it became true. Monsters and immortals only exist through continued belief, and if enough people believe that they're dead or gone then it becomes true, like Pan. Their varied forms exist and manifest as they're believed in and called upon. Names call attention and epithets summon aspects. They're acknowledgement. Belief. Putting a name to a concept creates it as an individual.
And that's so fascinating when you start applying it to demigods. How much of their abilities are based on belief in themselves, in expectations of each other, in their parents' expectations of them? We've seen mortal figures who became immortal in some form or another because they were remembered. Even the lares - ancestral house gods, who persist because they're remembered. They have a legacy.
At what point does a demigod achieve that status? Rumors and whispers about them so persistent that they slowly become true. "I heard that Jason Grace is the son of two gods, does that make him a god?" "I heard Percy Jackson defeated a titan single-handedly. That he can create hurricanes without breaking a sweat. That he can control blood." After awhile, after enough rumors, does it become impossible to tell where they end and the legends begin? Isn't that what being a demigod is; half-legend?
#pjo#riordanverse#analysis#i went a little prose-y there at the end but i am THINKING THOUGHTS#imagine being a demigod and knowing your EXISTENCE is slowing becoming warped because of others' perceptions of you!#Jason living on a pedestal his entire life and worrying so much that one day he's going to bleed ichor and his fate will be sealed#Percy recognizing that his powers are growing beyond his previous limits in ways that don't seem natural. don't seem right.#and he realizes what's happening and just has to hope the whispering quiets down and the rumors are forgotten so he can live a normal life#also the potential for demigod existential horror#becoming aware that You as a concept is slowly shifting. twisting. to match the perception others have of you#how TERRIFYING is that? like obviously it'd probably only go to an extent for most demigods cause half-mortal#but their powers? etc? SCARY#Percy being aware that his powers are becoming warped and trying to dissuade gossip about himself so it returns to normal#Nico who the more he's welcomed into the camps the more he finds himself being essentially declawed#his rough edges slowly worn away. his powers weakening and becoming less frightening. is it worth it?#and how difficult must that inherently make it for him to allow himself to be known?#and again. shaking Jason petrified that CJ is going to accidentally believe him into immortality. his worst nightmare.
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MAYBE...maybe... ONE singular manepear....
just the one ^_^
alt backgrounds cus I wasnt entirely sure what to pick lol xp
#manepear#manepear fanart#bliss smp#<- I think so yah?#bliss smp fanart#bsmp#uzudoodles#ty asker!#mcyt#mcyt fanart#wasn't completely sure abt my design but yknow for I first time I still think it's p good#Also @yuridemon i thought it was just a joke but no you are actually the only manepear artist like… I figured there must have been at least#one other person who had drawn him??? but no you're genuinely the only person who has ever posted about manepear on tumblr???? which was#something that was absolutely terrifying to learn and honestly you're so strong for that…. weston yuridemon my hero…..
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i need to wynnepost. somebody has to
#its crazy how people will assume she is all the tropes she subverts and then ignore her#also how sympathy for circle mages’ indoctrination only lasts until they get old i guess and then fuck them#because its not as if they were ever a terrified child who’d never had anything better than a single templar’s mildest kindness and any kind#of home even if it was the tower#so an orphan kid who had no memory of anything but scurrying between farmsteads and hiding in barns#didnt want to leave. what a shock. you guys dont get the place comfort has in keeping circle mages complicit#so it’s violent and terrible and you never have privacy and your children get murdered and you’re always watched and hated#its also a warm bed and community and a chance to succeed#do you honestly think every kid from fucking THEDAS knows theres anything better out there#that doesnt make the circle good. it makes it horrific that they prey on vulnerable kids to teach them the world hates them#and only the circle is ‘safe’#i just think there should be some sympathy for those kids and what they grow up into#its easy for the player to walk in and say their character would hate the circle and never have listened to the templars#its easy for say an amell or even a surana with a family back home to not fear what they left behind#wynne genuinely thinks without the circle mages would all be murdered and she’ll fight and die protecting her fellow mages#from the right of annulment#yes its a flaw that she goes on to teach others the circle must be tolerated and that is precisely how the circle is perpetuated ove#over generations#but its amazing to me to just act like its her fault#well. this is more tags than i expected it to be
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BUNGOU STRAY DOGS 119 SPOILERS WITHOUT CONTEXT
#this chapter was absolutely wild#the good doctor meme was the only one i thought of immediately but the rest was just random pretty much#absolutely terrifying chapter too i must say#some of these are a stretch I'll admit but i still found it funny to use them#I have never seen the book of life movie im ngl but I was looking it up because some song lyrics from the calamatix#was also gonna include something about a knight and a proposal but couldn't think of anything off the top of my head tbh#hopefully this sows up in the tags plz plzplzplzplz#bungou stray dogs 119#bungou stray dogs#bsd spoilers#bsd 119#bsd#bsd manga#bungo stray dogs#mine#op#bsd memes
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#p4#p4g#persona 4#persona 4 golden#hanamura yosuke#yosuke hanamura#man yosuke really? more scared than when your own life was in danger in the tv world when your shadow was lashing out?#when you didnt have a persona and you didnt think anyone would do anything to help you?#(i believe it. it's just like yosuke to be like that.)#chewing glass at how invested hes become in nanako and in yu's family I'm honestly just#of course everyone wss terrified for nanako but yosuke describing it as the most terrified hes ever been is really just#also man i wonder what he was going to say when he started trailing off#i bet he was going to say something about how devastated yu was but thought better of it#and im#I feel like for yosuke in that moment when nanako was missing and his partner was emotionally distraught#he must have felt so helpless too#throughout the entire year yosuke took each kidnapping really personally he kept seeing it as a personal failure on his part#when he said he wasnt smart enough or good enough to prevent it even when he knew it was coming#and then to have it happen to someone close#i think yosuke definitely felt all of yu's pain#but he also felt the pain of not being able to do anything more for yu while yu was emotionally falling apart#like hes not just let nanako down but also his best friend too and IM JUST#ok im shutting up now bye#he's good with his queue
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so obsessed with susato that i forgot that her saving holmes's life wasn't something i just made up in my head but implied by the game to have been What Actually Happened.
#mikotoba susato#she's so everything. literally who is doing it like her. fantastic phenomenal iconic brilliant amazing etc etc#tgaa spoilers#dgs#i've always thought that susato's perspective on the direct aftermath of the shooting would be extremely interesting to explore#largely in part due to her treatment of holmes's wound blending his past with mikotoba and his present with the girl he is actively#devastatingly lying to whom he now owes his life to. and all the complicated emotions that must arise from that for him and then for her#when she eventually learns the truth#but also in part due to how her reputation in gregson's (and barok's too potentially?) eyes must have been changed afterwards. they both#know her as the almost eternally composed judicial assistant and they respect her for that in spite of their prejudices but she now she's#gone and saved a man's life and i think that respect grows... deeper? more personal? as a result. and regardless of how poised and composed#susato is she must have been somewhat shaken by the events right? she was probably terrified. and being questioned right after she's#bloodied her hands and clothes cant have helped so i imagine they must have seen that too. seen her more as the person she is rather than#just the title she possesses.#which i think would be interesting to explore. lots of untapped potential here i need to go back and replay to see if there is a slight#change in how gregson and barok interact with her but i believe there was. there shouldve been even if there wasnt idc#she is the moment. no one will ever come close 😤✊
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Does anyone else feel a debilitating fear of getting better? Is this normal? Does it secretly prove I'm just faking everything for attention? Probably tbh
#cicadas vent tag#likr#i was looking at my knee would and realised it was getting kinda better#and felt almost . disappointed and afraid#and with mental illness the feeling is rven worse#like of course i want to get better!!! obviously!!!#but i feel almost sad when i realized i havent had a suicidal thought in a while#but tbh#the fear of never getting better is also terrifying#it must be so annoying to watch me hate myself and hurt myself over and over again and not get any better#but the idea of getting better is scary too#yknow?#its all terrifying#maybe the only non scary reality is one where i isolate myself from all of my friends forever#but that just makes me sad#ok this feels kind of all over the place but . idk its a very all over the place kind of feeling#delete later#ok this one is getting taken out of the drafts early cuz i just refused my parents offer to wash my knee#and one od my thoughts was 'what if it stops hurting'#im fucked up like deeply i think#btw im doing fine now im so cozy just . yeah
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This might be controversial, but I've never had this idea of Britannia as being a particularly warm maternal figure. Like, I think she definitely loved her kids, but she was more concerned with their survival than with letting them be children if that makes sense. Her way of showing love was trying her damndest to protect them, and to make sure they could survive on their own after she was gone. It was less explicit "I love you"'s and more compliments on their progress or stern scoldings when they'd gotten themselves into danger. The British Isles Siblings are hard pressed to remember the last time their mother hugged them or sang to them, but they remember her pressing a blade into their hands, kissing their foreheads, and telling them to be brave. They know their worth because of her, but what tenderness they gained they learned elsewhere.
#hetalia#my thoughts#hetalia headcanons#hws britannia#hws england#hws wales#hws scotland#hws northern ireland#hws ireland#nyo!ireland#british isles siblings#sorry i was listening to fourth of july and it made me emotional#i know i make allusions to hotd all the time but think the scene between otto and alicent when he's banished#she loves them but those words aren't in their world's vocabulary#they also have the example of rome coddling his kids and them being utterly unprepared when he's destroyed#i think she'd be terrified of that happening to her own children#i also just think mothers who don't necessarily have what we'd call maternal instincts are interesting in their own way#especially when she has kids like molly and alwyn who have very strong parental instincts in contrast#people go “oh you must get that from your mum!” and are met with very awkward silence
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When Geto goes searching through the Time Vessel Association's facilities one by one, who or what is he looking for, exactly?
He knows Satoru is dead. Riko, too. I can't possibly imagine what it could've been like -- to come back to your senses and be hit with this realisation all over again. What thoughts raced through his head as he traced his steps back to where he'd left Satoru? As he approached that site of slaughter which Satoru's promise had become, how did he prepare himself to see his best friend's corpse? And then he saw nothing but the clearing torn through the ground like a ragged wound in Gojo's frantic attempt to keep the enemy in sight, buildings adjacent to the main shrine ripped out by their foundations and blown to smithereens. A splatter of sickening crimson where Toji landed his final blow. A few bug-like fly-heads still lingering. No bodies left.
How could Suguru make sense of Gojo's body disappearing along with Riko's? Did he think of his closest friend's corpse getting sold on the black market as an honorary prize and feel his nerves clench close with desperation and anger? Did he make peace with never being able to mourn Satoru properly, or was it a thought thrumming in his head like blood in his temples? Was that what he feared to reveal while rummaging through the Star Cult's scattered buildings?
And what if it was an imperative from Jujutsu High?
For Shoko to be able to patch Geto up, he must have made his way back to the college after his confrontation with Toji. And I can hardly imagine Suguru, being as deligent and rule-abiding as he was, not reporting the failed mission -- and Satoru's (presumable) death, too. And as we know, in order to prevent a sorcerer from turning into a curse after death, they should be eliminated using cursed energy. And Gojo was killed by Toji, who, bound by Heavenly Restriction, had no cursed energy.
Does this mean that immediately after being healed by Shoko Geto got sent on a mission to confirm the state of Gojo's body and potentially deal with the consequencies of him turning into a curse? Judging by immense amounts of cursed energy that Gojo holds, the curse born after his death would be extremely powerful, with Geto likely being the only one on par with it as the other half of the strongest duo. It's only natural that in case of something like that occuring Suguru would be the one to be sent to deal with it. Even if that means purging a curse once known as his best friend.
So Suguru asking 'Is it really you, Satoru?' is not him taken aback by Gojo being alive (well, this, too, but I'd argue that a different reaction would be better fit to express this sort of disbelief), but rather him inquiring about the nature of his friend's resumed existence after he was announced dead by Toji: 'Is it you as I know you? Or is it a cursed apparition that came into being with your death?'
#jujutsu kaisen#should i tag this as a theory?#jjk theory#jjk meta#gojo satoru#geto suguru#satosugu#shoko ieiri#riko amanai#toji fushiguro#it's painful to think about the prospect of both of them experiencing the fear of not being able to mourn their loved one properly#and instead be expected to deal with what they have become after death#i also think how receiving the news that satoru is dead from geto must have felt like for shoko#having one of her friends in front of her bleeding out in such terrible condition#and hearing that the other one is gone#and then she's left behind at jujutsu high because she's never sent out to dangerous missions#what a struggle it must have been to take up her now ever-present cynical attitude and accept that all she could do is the dirty work#of patching up her fellow sorcerers just so they could be assigned new missions#and get hurt and wounded over and over again#it's genuinely terrifying#and i also cannot stop thinking about how jujutsu high was just a walking distance away from the tombs of the star corridor#and still no soul was there to meet gojo and geto and kuroi with riko#the potential backup was so close#and yet all that happened still happened#it's driving me insane#and also i think the reason why geto drained himself so much by trying to carry out his duty with missions so meticulously#was partly because who could not allow himself to cut slack and relax after what happened during spvi where they absent-mindedly#indulged themselves with having fun#they were kids they were just kids no one should go through such horrors without support#let alone someone their age
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live reaction to the phineas and jonas scene in Trustfall
#it was an impulsive moment between two people who have spent a very long time feeling intense feelings#towards each other in a Very Intense Environment and now they're free they have no idea what the emotions mean and what to do with them#midst#midst spoilers#i think this is. a very exciting and interesting and in retrospect understandable dynamic for these characters#which also caught me completely off guard even despite the art for the scene#my personal prediction is#if it does ultimately turn out to be long-term romantic then yeah. i see it. its still a very cool and interesting development#but (and this is very biased personally as an aro person) assuming the Intense Feeling Must Be Romantic before ultimately realising it isn'#is cool to me!#either way. great episode. great scene. truly the two paladins of all time#and i am equal parts excited and absolutely terrified for the last 3 eps#also to go back to the screenshot: it was posted in a server where sadly no one listens to midst (despite my best efforts)#and i will not be elaborating on the nickname#i'm done now. maybe i will phrase these thoughts better when i am sober and havent worked 13 hours. c'est la vie#everyone listen to midst
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one of the more random things that disturb me about tma is simply the existence of the gorilla skin. like..........why. what was up with that.
#tma#tma podcast#the magnus archives#There are quite honestly a small amount of things I found genuinely disturbing about tma#Most of the episodes just got a good 'hm' out of me on the horror scale#But animals!!!! Animals scare me!!!!!#And I think I understand that the importance of it so far as the ritual goes#Was the fact that it was a special relic#But it also just makes me think about how terrifying it must have been#To have come across a gorilla before they were widely known animals#This somewhat human looking thing#That's big#And very possibly hostile/territorial#And then I think of all the horror stories surrounding chimps and ehhhhhhhh#The Ape skin is just very very scary to me lmaooo 😭#Like I probably would have been less freaked out by ancient human skin#So yeah#My top discomforts with tma so far are the murder pig and the ape skin#Who cares?#Idk!!!#This is my blog and I feel like chattin it up with myself!!!!
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