#also i love when ppl don't believe that i struggle with that when they are the one asking me to repeat myself

[phagodyke]

was gonna say smth else but this turned into a vent sorry everyone just ignore. typical weekend post on this blog u know how it is here we go👍

[nanowired-lover]

i hate when i'm feeling talkative as fuck and want to talk about nothing and everything, i hate when i'm going so non-vocal that i cannot even communicate through writing, i hate when i'm in between bc i feel suddenly too normal to complain about communication, i hate words euuugh

[i-yap]

MY FAVORITE IS DICK GRAYSON FORVER WILL BE DICK GRAYSON AND HERE IS WHY

DICK GRAYSON X Y/N ( FRUSTRATED ME EDITION)

- first of all , he is the hottest character in dc (literally the comics have written this line by line)

- he is the real one with communication issues. You think jason struggles with that? NO jason uses any chance to tell me people how much he suffered. But dick? He wears a smile, he hides everything he is feeling

- the only person who gets to see the real him is YOU. The stress, the pressure, the mommy daddy issues...cmon. and bruce prolly was the worst at raising grayson and learned from his mistakes for the rest

- dick is someone who tries to be happy. Who tries to have a normal life. Who tries not to let his issues affect him . But they do which is why he has so many fucked up relationships. But when he meets you he wants to keep you, he needs to keep you with him. So he tries yet again to open up, fix his issues, love you the way you truly deserve.

- AND let us all not pretend we are all not stressed asf in life. He is so joyful and bright and will almost never dull the mood. Car karaoke ? Done. Skinny dipping in some random lake you drive by? His suggestion. Amusement parks? He is excitedly pulling you to all the rides and WILL 100% WIN YOU THE BIGGEST TEDDY

- he is deep, he js in touch with his feelings and he knows how to take care of you. Idk abt u guys but I have issues . I want a man who gives you those words of affirmation, who makes it super obvious he likes you.

- he needs you just as much as jason or tim or damian do. He also never had genuine love, he also has been a soldier a leader the person responsible all his life. He needs yo hold you, he needs that peace and quiet away from everything he has to deal with . He wants someone he can come home to and just show how drained he is .

- he is so kind to the world but he WILL BURN IT FOR YOU . I refuse to believe any other opinion on this. No matter how big a hero this guy is...remember how he killed joker for jason? Someone he said he hated? Broke the no kill rule?? Yea imagine what he will do for you.

- and how dare u suggest he isn't jealous/ possessive. He gets so cranky..not insecure and u don't have to coddle him and avoid all other men ...but u do have to give him extra kisses

-HE IS THE REAL GREEN FLAG fuck the whole " a hero will sacrifice you for the world but a villain will burn the world for you" NOT HIM NO HE WILL KILL EVERYONE OKAY cuz how date anyone suggest taking you away from him after everything he has done for the world. You are his reward and you better remember that.

- slow waltzing in the kitchen while he sings you his favorite love song, giggling in a pretty cafe while sharing a piece of cake( he is feeding you the whole thing and will kiss you when u Ask why he isn't eating any himself) , getting tipsy and walking back home all sweet and drunk and in love. He is adventurous and wants to experience everything With you.

- best part, everyone around u will love him. I'm sorry but I like it when my bf is liked by the old ladies and my parents and my boss. He will make you the power couple, even if you aren't as "powerful". He is your biggest loudest supporter always. Always introducing you to ppl as if you cured world hunger , telling everyone just how smart and kind you are taking any opportunity to talk about You. And dancing with him at galas makes you feel like a princess

- he will get the best gifts, say the sweetest things, be the most supportive kind eyes only for you guy once he genuinely falls in love.

I love jason a lot too, and tim and bruce too. Like yes I daydream about all of them But I just hate how underrated my boy here is.

[growling]

*average self-proclaimed safe space tumblr blog voice* I soooooo support people with schizophrenia that must be so hard to you anyway I just saw some weird looking woman talking to herself right outside my house im fearing for my life should I call the cops. Yeah dude I support all the adhd havers in the chat just try to pay attention when I talk to you it's not that hard it's like the least you could do to show some regard for the other human being in front of you. Like it's fine to have memory problems but why did you forget this one thing in particular that was important to me do you like not care or anything you should try harder. I am one of the only real mental health advocates to still exist in this world I hear your struggles that being said I hope I never get to meet one of those irl sociopaths or people with aspd whatever they call them now they're so freaky and they can blend into society so well you might never know if you're actually face to face with an actual socio i mean person with aspd in the store absolutely one of my biggest fears what if they torture me in their basement. I absolutely empathize with all the people in here suffering from delusions as long as they like, don't actually show it or have one concerning me that'd be highkey uncomfy leave me out of this dude im not talking to you until you get help, anyway my fav character from my anime just presumably died but i still think they actually survived im sooo delulu lol. We should push for more wheelchair accessibility in our cities I agree but like it's so difficult to tell how many people are actually disabled and who are actually faking it, like, ummm why did that "wheelchair" "user" guy stand up just now cover blown lmaoo…. Yeah I support people with facial differences but I still have a right to be disgusted you can't control my emotions anyway can you tag your selfies as #body horror this deeply triggering to me. Speaking of triggering can you also pleaseee hide your scars or at least warn us beforehand jesus do you know how many people genuinely do not want to see it. Here is my extremely fast strobing lights and flashing gifset #epilepsy. Yeah I loveee girls with bpd beautiful princess disorder am i right they're so interesting the stigma sucksssss i'd love to get to be one's favourite person as long as they don't actually have any of those weird or violent symptoms or don't go into any of their "episodes" near me like that's a bit dramatic….. I deeply feel for those who had underwent narcissistic abuse from the hands of an npd I think my shitty ex boyfriend was a narcissist too tbh #surviving narcissism here are 10 signs you are dealing with a narcissist and here's a tutorial on how to trigger a narc crash to epically own them anyway does anyone else think we should start enforcing mandatory castration of all the newly diagnosed narcs like you know what happens when they reproduce right. But I am willing to support them as long as they go to therapy to get that fixed it's just you know. Anyway sometimes hospitalisation is fine if they're genuinely a danger to themselves like what do you want them to go live on the streets or actually get help?? I support all the people dealing with being a professionally diagnosed disordered system and I think it's sooooo terrible how literally 99% of the youth population nowadays is purposefully faking it for attention I did my research (1 minute google search, 2 minute r/fakedisordercringe scrolling session and consulting a single system that agrees with me). It's just not believable to me that there's really that many people with it isn't it supposed to be rare… Also are we really sure all those alleged people in their heads are really real or just their imagination maybe all of them are actually faking it huh food for thought. I am very uncomfortable with nonverbal high support needs ppl actually having sex like consent is supposed to be explicitly verbal only and, are we really sure they can even consent arent they like basically children. You can't call me ableist I'm literally autistic

[girlcowboy1]

I think gen z ultimately lost the war against mental illness when they decided to adapt the older generations rhetoric of "mentally ill ppl who have noticeable symptoms are bad and evil and must be avoided at all costs, they deserve to be alone and die alone" which... most people are not saying that outright, but that IS what they're saying, whether they realize it or not, when they choose to discuss these issues based on personal concepts of morality and punishment instead of approaching it with a mix of empathy and an understanding of science, and how the brain operates.

"Having a mental illness isn't an excuse" is true to a certain extent, but I think a lot of people don't understand that to an extent, it also IS an excuse. The only reason people like to believe that it isn't in any capacity is because mental illness is an invisible disability, and if there's one thing that people love to dismiss the impact of, it's invisible disabilities. Because we can't see what's going on beneath the surface, we struggle to understand the issue, we struggle to empathize with the affected person, whom we may prefer to instead write off as being lazy or malicious, when in reality they are in pain and/or are missing an important tool that helps them function the way they'd like to.

Before getting on medication, I felt and (still sometimes feel) as though I existed behind an invisible glass that separated me from everyone else. I could not understand the point of a lot of mundane things, I couldn't relate to those around me, I felt like my existence was a mistake that should have never happened and the universe was attempting to expunge me by making my life so hard I would kill myself.

And then I got on medication, and suddenly I was able to see things that I had never seen before but had existed in front of me the whole time. I was able to be kinder to people, to be more patient, to talk myself out of bad thoughts I would previously ruminate about for days and weeks. I was able to communicate more coherently, to express my feelings in a way I couldn't before. I wanted to do things again. I wanted to dress up, look nice. I wanted to BE nice.

Of course, these are all still things I struggle with. Like with most tools for disability, medication is helpful in giving me the ability to function in a way that makes life more enjoyable— but it doesn't completely cure the issue. The point is. I tried so hard, time and time again, to change on my own. I tried taking supplements, I tried mindfulness, I tried changing the way I eat, I tried self-help videos/books. But I was a deeply depressed, deeply agitated person whose brain was not wired the way it should have been. So none of what I tried would stick. I would act out in ways I KNEW was wrong, but when you get into a certain state of mind, it's difficult to speak to yourself, to talk yourself down from doing or saying things you know you probably shouldn't. Especially when you feel so isolated from others, and struggle to see the point in anything.

It was only after medication that I made long-term improvements. It was only after my brain chemistry was physically altered in a positive way that my brain could begin to function better, and that my outward behavior improved.

How the anatomy of the brain effects a person is a crucial part of mental health that gets left out of relating discussions too often, I think, and its where I believe gen z unfortunately tends to overlap with gen x and boomers. The brain is an organ like any other, and if it is damaged, or sick, or lacking somewhere in its anatomy.... it will not function properly. The person whose body it inhabits will not function properly.

[helsensm]

I cannot hold it in anymore I am absolutely OBSESSED with your art and the way you draw Lao.

I also would like to inquire….. just perhaps… what are your top head-canons for him, and/or your opinions on popular ships for him/which ones you like?

No pressure!! I hope you are having a wonderful day 🧡

me, trying to act normal every time an awesome artist I look up to says something nice about my art

Thank you so much! first of all, please take this Lao with you, he's yours now~

now let me preheat my bad english.....

Most of my Lao headcanons (if they are not related to a particular art I made) were yoinked from another ppl, because DAMN FELLAS your brains are sexy. 😏 So you might have heard some of them already, but here's my top general hcs for him.

NOTE: we are talking about the current timeline mk1 Kung Lao

- Lao is very expressive with his hands and he's THE TOUCH person. Just look at how many times he took Raiden by the shoulder in the first chapter alone?? He'll be pushing, and patting, and shoving, and punching you all over while telling about his breakfast or something.

- Lao is struggling with inferiority complex. Since childhood he was under a tremendous amount of pressure, he has to do things right, to be better, or else he would be mocked or punished. Now he believes that he should be the best, or he would not be taken seriously. He's constantly seeking validation in his peers, causing him to act cocky and over-confident.

- Anger issues, usually when someone questions his skill.

- People call him lazy because he tries to act like everything comes naturally to him. In reality he trains hard and takes things seriously. Like, he's fighting with a RAZOR RIMMED HAT fgs, it's not something you can master in a day! Also he always got energy running through his veins, lucky bastard... *cries in iron deficiency*

- He makes his hats by himself. With his hands. He designs and creates. ALL of them. I will die on that hill.

- He's a slow to trust, but ride or die as a friend.

- He's a trouble maker FOR SURE, but not a bully. He's respectful and polite to most of the people (if they don't provoke him), also drinks his respect-women juice.

- Master of sass and sarcasm. And yes, I think he swears, but in the right circumstances or the right company.

- He's got rizz NOW, but in his teens he had zero game because he could not keep his mouth shut and would scare off the person with the most ridiculous piece of idiocy.

- I read it in one fic and really loved the idea that Liu Kang "told the blossoms" about Kung Lao, and they really liked him 🌸 so now they are following him around and bringing him news and gossips, that's why there's always those goddamn petals aroung him aasghGHHHj 🌸🌸

- He's rolling his eyes at Johnny, but they quickly become besties.

- He actually has a cold relationship with Liu Kang. Don't get me wrong, he trusts him, respects the hell out of him and will run into a wall for a man. But I think Liu will distance himself because of all the memories of HIS Lao and how badly they sting. oTL

- That smile and a bow Lao did after loosing to Raiden? He meant that. Loosing hurted BAD, but the pain was pushed aside by the sence of pride and happiness for his best friend.

oh shit, this is getting out of hand, I'm starting to think about the other timelines and dynamics, we'll be here all week hhhhgh

About the popular ships... Well, I'm a big fan of railao (yeah NO SHIT who would have thought), but I am a multishipper, so I'm just happy to see my fav characters feeling good in someone's hands. 😊

I really like the liulao and laoliutana for several different reasons. 👀 The johnshilao (or is it laojohnshi..? erm) was the one that didn't impress me at first (love the Lao just third-wheeling with a tired expression <:'D), but recently I'm starting to warm up to all the different dynamics these three can have. And that is, in no small part, thanks to you and your kenlao agenda 👀💖 damn you created such a nice cozy universe for them I'm 🥺💕💗💖

Bi-Han/Lao is a bit random, but I love how catto did them, they are such a cute pair of assholes! >:3

ummm, yeah, so I'm going to stop there ahahhH. Thank you again for asking and for all the nice little feels your art provides, I admire you tremendously~

[collegetennisoriginstory]

So, I was romancing Sam on every playthrough but decided to branch out finally, and now I have a tier list; ‼️Potential spoilers‼️

Tobin: By far my favorite RO. I typically don't like the archetype of "brooding ro and their charming ro counterpart" It just doesn't interest me as someone who has seen a lot of het romances employ this trope. But giving Tobin the chance they deserve and finding that I like how they respond to my MC's own flirtatious nature and then discovering how they feel about my MC being the same gender, just adds an extra layer of interest for me that I appreciated. They're kind, considerate, and very thoughtful of their friends. Very quickly blew the rest of the competition out of the water for me. I think their mindset when it comes to tennis explains why they're not the no.1 Seed despite being the captain of the team, and it honestly surprised me. I think the full weight of their route is explored best when MC is similarly looking to go pro as it parallels Rayyan nicely. Their kidness is the space they give you is born from experience and the fear of doing to MC what was done to them and I just eat that stuff up. Also it is very rare to have a black RO who is treated with any level of depth, and I just 🥹love that we Tobin.

Rayyan: In a surprise twist, Rayyan gets the second spot for similar reasons as Tobin. I think the enemies to friends to lovers(partners) arc that is presented in their story is intriguing. Like Sam, they have a level of history with the MC that makes them familiar when heading into the new space, so I made it a habit to stay near them when at all possible. Rayyan isn't particularly cold, or as cold as ppl might assume, I think they have a very good balance of being a sort of quiet and reserved person that still manages to be personable. I feel that playing like I do, my MC might've come off as flippant to them, which only adds to the anxiety that they feel going into this season. Their struggle of being visually Arab in a world and country that sees non whiteness as punishable is very felt. It's really special to me that the two most prominent ROs are dark skinned people of color. Sorry for being biased, but even when I wasn’t actively romancing them, they got major points for that.

Sam: My baby gets the third spot and I think that's fair. What i adored about Sam is the pining of a friends to lovers story. I never make the first move with Sam, despite playing very flirty, bc I see my MC with not having to put up a front with Sam. So the things they do or say that signify to others that my MC is looking for something physical aren't used with Sam; they believe MCs closeness with them is strictly platonic while my MC believes that Sam has been lightly rejecting this whole time. Just something about those missed connections get to me. (Also, the varcity jackets!? So cute) Now, Sam loses points due to being away at another university for a majority of the story thys far. Which made me wonder if placing them in a new environment with MC might change things for them. Everything IS different now; so, who is to say that their relationship hasn't run its course? Juicy, but due to lack of presence, I'll keep them at 3rd.

G: They're French. Automatically, a point is taken off. They're also very sexy as a woman (my MC is a they/them lesbian) so I felt that, to remain true to character, I would have to ignore that and see what G has going on. Ngl, they do sort of play out like a romance novel character in the most obvious way so far 😭 no hate though. I just couldn't not think about "Oh, you sexy French student." Whenever they said anything. Smoldering looks from across the room at a crowded college party, like okay 400 days of summer <3. I think they're rather perfect for players who are looking for some steam outside of the locker room. They have the same issue as Sam, as in, they're not present in the locker room. They're not our teammate, so we don't really get the same level of relationship building with them as u would a Rayyan or Tobin. And I don't think that's a bad thing necessarily. I feel that speaks to the amount of work put in to make the team feel real and not just thrown together characters. Once I started to romance my teammates, I found it hard to flirt with anyone else, as I felt that they just didn't understand my MC on the same level.

Felix: ngl, they'd have to get security to get me off them, I have this burning rage in my heart whenever they show up. "🤼‍♂️ This is for Tobin, Cakepop‼️" I am sure there is indeed depth to them as a character, I am sure it hurts to hear someone say "I can not love you the way you want me to." And we are only human, we don't always behave the way we want to. But Felix makes my nipple itch they just remind me of men who just hold this anger for their exes unreasonably. I think there is an interesting parallel to be found in a Tobin route MC and Felix. I just don't have the language to put it together bc I will never romance them and I don't think I ever will, personally just can't bring myself to do so. They are what I felt Rayyan would be, and I'm fine with meeting them with hostility.

All in all, I'm glad I branched out to see what the other ROs were like it's definitely a testament to ur hard work and is greatly appreciated. I will continue to be messy and kiss Tobin, Rayyan, and Sam because I am toxic aim to be a learning experience, not a lover 🫶🏽

Oh my god~ It was so interesting to see your gradual evolution / journey through pursuing the different ROs.

I think it's really interesting in particular to see how Tobin's character is sort of 'hidden' beneath multiple layers, and you have to really work at unpeeling those layers, and it's really rewarding as a writer to see that route 'give' readers so much unexpected joy.

And, of course — I have a soft spot for stoic / unexpressive, overly-competitive, serious characters who are secretly just a giant sap. For Rayyan in particular, I think their drive to excel at tennis is counter-balanced against their loyalty, their ride-or-die-ness with the people they love. I love the extra bit of psychoanalysis that you did regarding Rayyan's anxiety about MC not taking tennis seriously, which is fine on its own, but really becomes an issue if they're partnered.

Sam having less 'screen-time' than the others is totally fair, and I think (or hope) will be made up for by the sheer amount of history they share.

As for the whole "French sexy" stereotype, I actually do think this is a crucial part of G's arc. The idea that perhaps they both see each other as 'archetypes' at the start (the jock-fling during one's exchange year, the sexy french exchange student), and then as they start understanding each other as real people, and then as they start (possibly) falling in love with each other (with all the eccentricities, all the imperfections), the relationship takes on more depth and dimension.

Finally, thank you so much for taking the time to explore all these different routes, and I'm so glad that doing so was rewarding for you :) I absolutely loved reading this message, so thank you also for sharing! It's always so fun listening to how different MCs, or different MC choices, and just different readers in general — have different takes on the ROs!

[zvezdacito]

// TWST Book 7 spoilers, thoughts of Malleus's writing as a character

So I was reading some other people's opinions on why some people consider Malleus overrated/annoying, and tbh this makes me really sad. The general consensus is that a lot of people fixate on certain sides and can only see him as one extreme or the other and it results in many ppl thinking a watered down version of his character is how he is in canon.

I feel that its such a shame because he's the most interesting, compelling and well-rounded take on his character archetype I've seen.

From my observation, usually they kinda make this archetype (the broody misunderstood 'everyone fears him like a monster except for one special person') someone you can't take that seriously, because of how his struggle usually kind of written in a way where everyone involved feel less like actual fully fledged original characters and really just one note tropes interacting with other one note tropes.

To elaborate: What i mean when i say this is usually ppl who hate him kind of just do because of plot requires them to and to show how all their haters are "normies" who can't get him because 'he's not like everyone else'. The misunderstood guy still usually has toxic personality issues but the story really tends to make it feel like they don't fear him for that but because they're shallow and have prejudice to ppl like him, so his personality issues are not framed as wrong or character flaws.

I don't think there's anything inherenrly wrong or mediocre with the "one special person who gives him a chance before anyone else" trope like I'm literally a Malleyuu enjoyer lol but like i said its all in the execution cause otherwise it fails to be compelling and believable. Usually in the poorly written version of this trope the guy doesn't undergo any character development other than showing more emotion and kindess to his partner because they melted his ice I guess so it really makes his whole character feel like its revolves around the sake of romance and fanservice.

Malleus doesn't fall into this trap in my opinion because his situation despite how fantastical it is, the way he was written makes it believable as to why everything is the way it is with him, and it also challenges the viewer if they would be able to say they wouldn't fear him too in that situation.

"We're gonna give you this character who everyone sees as a monster and show you deep down he just wants the same love as everyone else, making you contemplate changing judgement on him. He wants to prove this, but his way of going about it always inadvertently harms others."

"You know where hes coming from and if he had that social connection to give him a better understanding of others this wouldn't be happening, but its also equally understandable that the people hes trying to connect with don't deserve this and fear him even more after this, trapping him in a cycle of isolation."

"Given his track record, do you go about giving him a chance or just considering the repeatedly proven danger he brings. With the valid reasons of both parties, can you really say he isn't a monster and demand that 'if only people be near him'?"

There's just such a tragic and thought-provoking dilemma to his character that adds so many layers that makes him so good.

As omniscient viewers we have the benefit of seeing what he's going through form his POV so we can sympathize with him and understand that he thinks what he's doing is the best course of action and he's just trying to create a "win for everyone" situation.

But also everything he does ironically reaffirms everyone's fear and distrust of someone like him. No one can deny he has a tendency to cause further destruction when he tries to do something "good", examples including: past Briar Valley lantern lighting fire, the Halloween 2 ghost world party, and now his Sleeping Curse stunt in Book 7 Part 2 (they really emphasize this by making the spoken name of his UM basically mean "Malicious Fairy" but have its written name used to convey what its meant to mean be "Blessing").

↑ Given this, it honestly makes sense others, especially those who don't know him all that well, would just expect the worst when he's around already, and you wouldn't be able to blame them for that given the track record. It doesn't help that this impression is worsened since he tends to cause misunderstandings due to his lack of familiarity with human social cues.

Alongside the bias and preconceived notions from his status and reputation, they also make a point on how his personality flaws are still also a huge factor in pushing people away, such as not being able to see things through the perspective of others.

He also holds a subconcious belief due to what has been ingrained in him since childhood as a Draconia and the next in line that because he's superior to others at certain things, he has the right and responsibility to decide on what will protect and help them, disregarding the individual values/priorities of human beings and leading him to take reckless and destructive action with good intentions.

His upbringing, character strengths and character flaws are all realistically connected to each other and the way they are subtly shown to be ever-present in defining his decisions, goals and thoughts throughout the whole story. So we don't really need to have a character go out of their way to exposition this to us this word for word just so we can understand and believe it.

Moving onto something slightly more lighthearted, I really also like how dorky Malleus surprisingly was. Other similar characters in the archetype I usually see don't really have any hobbies, interests, or quirks outside of being a broody authority figure, which might've been appealing to some at first but it really just gets stale and boring after a while.

This should be the bare minimum in making a fleshed out and interesting character so maybe i sound like im giving them too much credit for pointing it out😭 But yeah compared to the other examples it's good that Malleus has his Tamagotchi and Gargoyle interests it makes him feel like a believable person who has his own life going on too (with the bonus that these interests are also metaphors for aspects of his character). The gap moe adds an endearing side to him, and makes the gap between his intent and impact of his actions even more tragic. It wouldn't hit the same without this side.

(^ Forgot how the exact quote goes, but it basically said dark stories are more effective when there are moments of genuine happiness and good in them, compared to if it was always just grim and edgy. The former increases the stakes and tragedy because you have something you to care about losing, while for the latter there is nothing for you to care about so nothing the story does really matters. Same logic applies to Malleus)

Overall, it's just like an unfortunate incompatibility of goals and circumstances, which is what TWST is all about. Another thing I want to say is out of all the characters, I feel like Malleus is the one who is the ultimate embodiment of TWST's main themes:

-> How it's not about "hero" vs "villain" just differing circumstances crossing paths and clashing because of how people on either side have their own complex perspective and dreams they want to realize

-> And how connection and finding community is important to find people who will help you make up for what you lack in reaching your goals and to better understand all the factors that caused the situation in the first place.

As if seeing yourself reflected in a mirror, the more you get to know the people around you, you realize in many ways you are actually quite alike, and through understanding others you could also possibly better understand certain aspects of yourself. It's sort of encouraging you to do the opposite of dehumanizing others and yourself, which is something Malleus has most evidently internalized.

So yeah this was so long😭 I had a lot I wanted to say since Malleus is my favorite TWST character. Idk if I missed anything or if i managed to express my thoughts in a cohesive way but yeah. I kinda go into a rage whenever I see the worst takes ever be put out about his character but tbh sometimes I can't completely blame others since fandom trends and the convenience of simplifying things into tropes can warp your perception of a character and what you associate with them.

Also sometimes twst doesn't do a good job with utilizing his character like Book 5 where he got turned into a deus ex machina and Halloween 2 where they killed any hype and intrigue for the plot we had at the beginning through the ending reveal and gave the worst justification ever for Malleus and Lilia's actions ever.

Regardless, I hope more people manage to move past this and appreciate his character for what it really is soon though. He's an amazingly tragic character; a lot of thought was put into how his experiences, strengths and weaknesses would convincingly connect, and he represents something relevant in the story's plot and themes.

The fact that I've seen some people unironically believe that Malleus may just be faking his cluelessness of social cues to hide his "true evil" is evidence to how convincing his character's situation is, that even some in the audience who know more about him than the characters would still end up in the same place of doubt and distrust of Malleus because of what he's capable of.

Aight thank you for reading👍

[hepaidattention]

okay, so I know I've heard some ppl say that JJ not being all in Kiara's space isn't believable. Though I do think that makes sense on surface level, because yes JJ has always been known to lack personal space, I have some arguments about it....

1) JJ has changed a lot from the character he was in s1. S1 JJ was very flirty, had not seen a lot less death, and didn't take a lot of things seriously. S1 JJ also never considered to have a shot with Kiara, ever, so his actions were not often thought through. He's not very comparable to s4 JJ.

2) JJ shows affection through hugs and like shoulder squeezes, but mostly through JB and Pope. He did hug Kiara on occasion, but when he did it was normally when he was hugging everyone or he was going through an emotional time and Kiara was comforting him. We have yet to see JJ go through anything emotional where Kiara could comfort him. When they almost died they were in serious pain and dying, and clearly didn't like to show affection with an audience (in the chamber pod). Which brings me to my next point.

3) Showing affection publicly is not for everyone, and every scene we have seen with jiara is them in public or with the pogues. Going from friends to lovers, especially while the rest of your friend group remains, makes changing your pda dynamic a little strange. Like I cannot imagine kissing my once best friend, now boyfriend, in front of a my other best friends. They'd tease and make fun, and it's just oddly embarrassing. The one time we see them be affectionate in public, the pogues literally make fun of them and it makes them stop kissing. I'm sure it just became habit to only be affectionate behind closed doors.

4) Kiara has never been a touchy feely character, and JJ has always respected that. We saw on multiple occasions through Pope that she did not want to be touched when she was going through stuff, and she often just never hugs ppl or gets up in their space unless there's a reason (like celebrating or comforting). I think JJ would naturally know not to cross boundaries that she had always had up, but also it's again, probably a habit not to. Even in the scene when she puts her hand on JJs shoulder, he looks at her like it's not normal for her to touch him like that. She does tap him a little, but if Kiara was a normally touchy feely character a pat on the shoulder would feel like a comfort little pat. Someone's who's love language is physical touch, would do that just because. someone's who's love language is NOT physical touch would never do that unless they were scared or sad, needing comfort. (my last love language is physical touch so I know from experience). JJ looks at her and then immediately sees the fear and sadness in her eyes, because the fact that she's showing any kind of physical touch was odd to him. Like it got his attention just because she touched him. That shows me, she doesn't often show physical affection unless she's in the right mood or is initiating it herself. JJ clearly just respects that part of her.

5) JJ went through a lot to finally admit to Kie that he loved her back, and a lot of it is JJ not thinking he's good enough. Just because he admitted his feelings, I still don't think that meant he suddenly got past all his insecurities and now just think he's worth it. I think we see Kie initiate most of their physical interactions also because JJ doesn't feel like he can, or should. He's still struggling with feeling worthy of kissing her or holding her hand, because he doesn't think he is. However, he does love her, and he knows she loves him, so really I think it's just Kiara being patient and reminding him constantly that he deserves to be loved too. I also think this next part of s4 will show us a lot of JJ overcoming his feeling that he's not worthy of love, considering he now knows the man who raised him was never even his father to begin with.

6) OBX has NEVER been a show to show a lot of pda. Jarah are the exception (bc they are THE couple for the show, the endgame no matter what), and even then we've seem them make-out very few times. Like. It's actually crazy how little kissing we've got from them considering it's JARAH. S4 did not give us a lot of content (in the phsyical realm) from any of the couples, actually, and I'm not that mad about it. The show has never been about that. It's always been about their relationship, how they care for each other. It's not a show that waste screen time on having the viewers watch some steamy scenes. The show is literally about friendship and treaure hunting lol

7) My final point... it has been almost 2 years since s3. Jiara has been together for almost 2 years. Most couples that are together for 2 years, have moved past the honeymoon stage by now. The excitement of new love has faded. JJs need to probably be in her bubble and constantly kiss her and constantly touch her, if that phase ever happened, has probably past and now has changed into a more just comfortable with each other stage. They're happy with each other, they're happy to just be around each other. 2 year mark for a relationship actually usually leaves couples with having to open up more emotionally, having to be vulnerable with each other, discuss their future like Jarah was demonstrating. And, considering what's going on with JJ, o wouldn't be surprised if that would be coming pretty soon.

[honeybee2807]

Do you know what is funny to me? It's that some people read Cursed Child and genuinely believe that Albus is Harry's favorite child and his other kids(James in particular) are his least favorites. I just read this fanfic which is CC compliant and had James saying "No matter what I do, dad still loves Albus more!"

Like c'mon, if that's how Harry treats his favorite child, he should not be allowed to parent at all. Like you don't tell to your favorite child that you wish they weren't your child! In one scene, he literally confides to Ginny that he wished that Albus was more like James and Lily who were more easier to handle.

Like i get it. HC all what you want(James and Lily could be more neglected so Harry could focus on the "problem child" like certain dynamics of fucked up families). But Albus is definitely not the favorite child. All of James' and Lily's interactions were positive and happy for god's sake.

I genuinely feel like its all projecting. Most of the ppl who hc this tend to be oldest siblings. I once remember a reddit thread that stated that Albus was an ungrateful brat in CC and James was so unloved and neglected and when asked for evidence, they stated that in the epilogue, Harry focused more on Albus than James, the day Albus goes to Hogwarts the first time!!! Ofc Harry is going to focus on Albus. And the OP didnt like that only Albus got to know about Harry's sorting problem, even though Harry said to Albus to comfort him. Redditors didn't believe it and later the OP confessed that they thought James was like them and said how OP's parents favored younger brother over them.

Well I don't think OP realised that there is a thing called "Middle Child syndrome".

Tldr: C'mon, how is Albus the favorite child???? If for some reason that is true, I'll petition to steal all the kids and kick out Harry, cuz if that's how you treat a favorite child, I shudder to think about how he treats Lily and James

PS- Sorry if I sounded a bit rude. It's just some people use this hc to bash on Albus and call him an ungrateful brat. Like if you want to be an anti, no need to create an entire neglect plotline. And also this reminds me of the idea that older siblings suffer way more and any younger siblings who struggle are brats. I sympathise(those parents who favorite the younger siblings should be punished), but i dont think anyone realises how the same older siblings torment and terrorise their younger siblings for fun. (One girl stabbed sister with pencil and got cheered on for it and there are a lot more stories[drowning a younger sib, etc].) If you think I don't have any siblings, you're wrong and my sibling and I don't pull this shit. Ofc, I don't want to downplay older sibling's trauma but y'know it gets tiring to see younger siblings get demonised constantly

[mysteryanimator]

I love your animations, but I'm still struggling to view them without thinking about their last canon interaction. Can you tell me what you envision their makeup would be like?

(Lol I’m so sorry to all the ppl who work on Nocturne reading this 💀 and just generally everyone)

Thank you so much that means a lot! But now, you’ve unveiled my trap card and given me an excuse to write my thoughts on Mizrak and Olrox, so this will get pretty long. Also, this may end up being very subjective/personal taste in some parts so I hope everyone doesn’t mind (and hope you don't mind the funky grammar!) This is an open discussion too, I’d like to hear everyone’s thoughts! 

Now with that out of the way here we go!

(This is old unfinished storyboards for a previous iteration of their makeup scene I did back in jan, never finished them due to uni/another project, I'd like to someday tho because guh the themes.)

Now first of all, I’d like to think that a proper makeup/conversation wouldn’t happen for a bit and would be drawn out because they’re both still hurt, angry, sad, and confused at not only each other but themselves. They’re not the type to get into loud verbal arguments for this, definitely some verbal jabs at each other though. Mean petty comments, oh absolutely. I’d like to personally believe they’d still yearn for each other, perhaps even more so after Olrox indirectly confessed and Mizrak practically turned it down. 

Now, there are soooo many different ways that they’d even see each other again, many different ways it could come to that initial point where they’ve made up. Though I’ll go with one of my personal idea (which people keep egging me on to animate WHICH… I dunno I don’t have free time rn so I’m just blurting it out into written format while I can 😭 I want to though, maybe later in the year for fun if season 2 doesn’t beat me to it). 

Have to establish my vision, but I’d think that Richter, Maria, Annette, Alucard and Mizrak are hopping from abandoned town to abandoned town due to the inability to return to Macheoul for the time being. While Olrox has been on his own (doing what, I’m not even sure my personal headcanon for this.) I think Alucard and Mizrak have a conversation about Alucard’s past in a group setting and it strikes a chord with the monk- since after all, Alucard’s dad is THE Dracula, and his mother (bless her, I miss her) is human. You know how that whole backstory goes, and it parallels Olrox a lot. Also Mizrak and Annette will absolutely have a deep conversation too. Just solely from the comment that was made: 

“We’re all descended from gods, we just have to learn how to draw their power.” Nocturne s1 ep 2

Annette clearly having powers from Haitian gods, absolutely challenging how Mizrak was only certain of one God. Yes, Mizrak is extremely stubborn and it will take him a bit, but he’s different from the Abott in the sense that he will not let religion blind his path to good. He ‘uses his head’ as said before, not god, not the church- his head. Mizrak’s idea of the church and his faith is now a mess and it’s up to him on how he interprets it and rewrites it knowing what he knows now (this is important I swear when it comes to the makeup scene).

Now we’re at the actual scene at hand: Olrox and Mizrak making up.

Side note: oh god I’m practically writing this whole thing as if its going to be played out for an episode, but that’s how it works in my brain LOL but you asked so you shall receive. I am so sorry HAHA

There’s been a lot of build up from this point where they have been meeting up here and there by themselves, but you can clearly tell whenever they do they both hurt and yearn- which would lead to their proper makeup scene. I’m just inserting this for fun, but I’d imagine this would take place in an abandoned church in the town they’re camping in for the night. For a lot of symbolic reasons; devotion, sacrifice, forgiveness, gathering. This along with the simple fact, Mizrak’s relationship to the church has changed completely from here. I’d like to think that even when he’s trying to rekindle that connection with God, it leaves that icky overcoat on his skin. 

“Faith is a company in the hardest of times, when the world abandons you.” Nocturne ep 3

The church indeed had saved him from whatever terrible horrific thing happened to him in the past, however whatever saved him can still be horrible and terrible too. It is infallible.  It is cruel in an attempt to gather community and peace. So, yes- faith can be company when the world abandoned him, but his faith is no longer with the church. He’s taking it back and finding some place else to rest it. (Olrox, it’s Olrox, probably ooc but I’m making it Olrox). 

In this church, the conversation between them will initially start as a discussion about religion, faith and that whole sort of deal. It’ll open up about Mizrak exact struggles from his mouth and how he particularly feels about it, then we get more insight onto Olrox’s thoughts, his perception of the church and perhaps even a deep dive into Aztec history again. Maybe even talk about Olrox’s Quetzalcoatl form, though really this is self indulgent. It’s an aspect I’d absolutely love to be explored and I think it being discussed in revere in a Catholic Church,  with Mizrak actually being open to it due to his new perspective? Oh my god, sign me up. Regardless, it would hold similar energy to episode 6: Gulity Men to be Judged. There’s a weight to it. 

Then it gets heavier when the conversation pivots.  

Mizrak’s attachment in the church was due to him caring about people and, hypothetically, to save him from whatever detriment came for him in the past. The last canon interaction, their falling out they had in season 1 was because he cared about others. To a fault. Now, here he is, standing in front of someone he cares about. It’s going to open a conversation between what’s happening between them and finally properly discuss what happened from their last canon interaction in nocturne season 1. 

A lot of finger and hand brushing from Olrox, which at first I’d think gets no reaction as an attempt for restraint before Mizrak warms up to it and even reciprocates by doing the same thing. All of this is very gentle in my opinion. It’s slow, tender, and most importantly vulnerable. It has the physical contact reminiscent of their first fast rough and tug in the courtyard and piggybacks off the vulnerability they both have when they both stand next to the window in episode 6. They probably also just physically get closer to each other at the moment. Just gradually though. The distance gets closer and closer until their foreheads are practically touching without them realizing it. They’re comfortable though, they don’t want to leave. 

They absolutely get to a point where they both admit to saying “I love you” without straight up saying “I love you” because that’s just a very them thing. Or maybe they do straight up state because Olrox does admit he was in love (with his partner) and doesn’t shy from that fact. It’s a nice conversion of the trope and great to hear from a mlm couple to say I love you… but man do I do love when characters get all poetic-y when their profess their devotion to each other by literally talking in prose, so maybe with good writing both can be done and still be quite powerful but still be gentle. 

In my interpretation YEAH I’LL MAKE THEM KISS AFTER THIS, this is my vision after all. Also, yeah they’re gonna fuck. In the church? Perhaps. Is it a tad OOC, maybe. HOWEVER, consider imagery and symbolism. I just think the image of it would be great, even if it was censored to hell and back, it can be so artistically done. Just imagine the implication alone with me for a second. I think the whole concept of doing it in a church is an interesting build upon the quotes from the show;

“God is not here. This church is an empty box.” From the first Castlevania series.

“House of God? This place is just a heap of bricks and stone.” From Nocturne said by Maria. 

The church is a husk, especially having it abandoned- it’s rather what you do with that box that makes all the difference. The people inside are the driving force, so I think it’s both poetic and funny to have Mizrak and Olrox fucking in an abandoned church. Surface level: fuck you god I’m fucking my hot vampire boyfriend in your house. Deeper level: I could write a whole thing on this but I’ll refrain. You can get the gist of breaking free of restraint, and devotion and letting himself be human, rather than a soldier (which he already slowly does). 

Though also this sex scene isn’t necessary, I just like exploring explicit content in artistic ways, especially if I can throw in religious symbols and heighten that hunger/devotion to a person- but the “I love you” in the church is pretty powerful already.  

Then after all of this they take it at their own pace. However, they only live life once and continue together like that- they both know this concept very well because of the very nature of who they are, so they spend it in each other’s company. 

Now you also get the squad’s reactions, well namely because I do not think this would be an easily hidden thing. Like absolutely could get away with it in season 1, but everyone will know something is up for sure in my iteration. The 'hypothetical' Mystery Animator season 2 iteration. As subtle as their longing stares and quiet hand touches may be reserved for just them- those little interactions are loud.

Richter would absolutely be in shambles over Olrox, the killer of his mother, and Mizrak being a thing. Both in a “this is the most horrible thing that’s happened in my life” and also a he’s going to be an absolute shithead to Mizrak and make fun of him, lightheartedly of course. Alucard would absolutely have an interesting perspective because again, his parents. Maria already has disdain for the church plus the “vampires are evil… and evil has to be fought.” However, in the presence of Alucard, I think a lot will change because he’s half-vampire. Annette, I’m unsure of what her reaction would be, because I’m very sure she’d be receptive to Alucard being a vampire and then would appreciate Olrox’s mindset and values. However, gonna keep hammering, Olrox killed Julia Belmont which I feel will be comedically hammered in if Olrox decides to hang around the squad occasionally. 

And with that, we’re done! (I think)

Thank you for reading 🫶 this probably will not happen in cv s2 but it’s fun blurting out my hc. I’m really excited to see what they do, and even perhaps even go in the opposite direction due to episode limitations… maybe a season 3 👀 who knows.

[confused-disaster32]

Hi! So you can call this a rant or a vent or whatever I don't rlly care - I just wanted to put some of my opinions out there bc it is eating me inside out to keep my opinions on Alastor's sexuality and all of the discourse about him being shipped to myself.

Also i'd like to state that I'm writing this as someone who is aroace but has no actual wish to be in a romantic relationship and actually struggles to so much as picture what that's be like for myself. I would also like to state how I'm not speaking for the whole community and others will have different opinions to myself.

Firstly - aroace is a spectrum (as someone who is on the aroace spectrum btw) and I completely agree with ppl who say that it is a spectrum and shipping has always existed and you can't rlly stop an entire fandom. My only problem is when ppl completely ignore that he is aroace while doing this, bc to me it seems like there's so much potential to having him have to go through those types of emotions and to write him off as if he's completely allo not only can make some people feel unseen but also just isn't as fun.

Also I kind of believe that he'd possibly date someone for the entertainment - like even if he didn't exactly feel romantic attraction maybe he'd be willing to be around someone closely bc he might like the reactions he'd be getting. (example: he might've stayed in a relationship with Vox maybe not out of pure attraction but if he found out that affection could make the TV short-circuit? He'd be interested)

Adding to that, I personally do not actually ship him with anyone romantically due to his character + the fact that I am projecting my own distaste for romance on him but you do you ig.

Also, on the note of nsfw around him - sometimes you cannot stop a fandom, rule 34 exists and some people who are asexual sometimes may want to have sex and all of that stuff. Personally I think he'd probably be sex-repulsed due to the fact that he canonically has issues with being touched.

ALSO, i personally think that way too many people are brushing over the idea of putting Alastor in a QPR - like that would literally be so awesome.

Alastor x Rosie? Cute af (to me Rosie gives of aro vibes too, but more romance - favourable) like they're already besties and honestly I think that Rosie would defo help him figure out about his identity considering that he's quite obviously not all that sure about slang and stuff.

Vox x Alastor - It has the potential to be SO FUCKING FUN like, you get to experiment with how they feel for each other, maybe what Alastor's got going on bc he died before being aroace was rlly a thing and he'd be confused about how he felt about Vox for sure.

Lucifer x Alastor - I quite like it, ik that Lucifer is supposed to be with Lillith but she did take an extremely long hiatus on her family up in heaven so i think it's okay. Plus the idea of them bonding and becoming close due to Charlie is wonderful.

Even angel and Alastor - maybe after Val Angel doesn't want a super sexual relationship - maybe he's not all that interested in something purely romantic either and though I love huskerdust this would still be pretty cool.

Really all I'm saying is; be considerate. Incorporate the fact that Alastor is Aroace, even if you do ship him - in or out of QPRs - and ofc sometimes writing someone who is part of a group ur not in is difficult (coming from someone who often struggles in writing especially when it comes to romance) but taking a crack at it might actually turn out to be rlly cool.

But please don't ignore his aroace-ness, there's not a huge amount of aroace characters out there and acting like someone isn't can be annoying for ppl who want to find rep around their identity, esp if they haven't seen much before (I can relate and he was one of the first aroace characters I was introduced to after I found out what it meant).

So yeah, that's my piece.

[tirfpikachu]

i mean there’s genuinely no difference between a frat bro saying ‘i’m a lesbian too haha’ and a ‘transbian’… they are males intruding on a female exclusive sexuality that has always and will always face harassment from males just for daring to not feel attraction to them. a man did not grow up with the same experiences as a lesbian. a woman did not grow up with the same experiences as a gay man. they are heterosexuals with het privilege inserting themselves into gay spaces and it is insulting to actual homosexuals - who are a very small minority!- to intrude on our lives and communities. i have been pushed out of most mainstream lesbian spaces by ‘transbians’, they revolve around girldick and people who ‘love butches’ who are always just masculine males. i hold no energy for men who claim space for themselves without giving a damn about us - which is most ‘transbians’. because they are entitled males and were raised entitled males. you are doing fine work by being diplomatic but god including ‘transbians’ is downright insulting to lesbians who have been dealing with lesbophobia and misogyny because we aren’t attracted to and don’t relate to trans women *by nature*. they are heterosexual males and lesbians should not be expected to stand by them after they’ve colonized our spaces. it’s disappointing that you hold such an inherently homophobic view about heterosexual people

also are you not supporting bisexual lesbianism/split attraction model by saying people who are trans, have ‘gay experiences’, but are technically hetero/bi can use gay labels? there’s no criteria for lesbianism besides experiencing similar harassment to lesbians? i think you are well-spoken but should interrogate this train of thought more. who does it serve to include bisexual, or, less generously, heterosexual trans people in gay sexuality?

i thought for a really long time about this ask! it's such a complicated topic that ofc seems very obvious to ppl on each side. originally when i answered your previous asks (you or someone else on the topic) i honestly wasn't fully settled into my thoughts about it. i'm still fairly new to spaces that aren't mainstream tra spaces. i don't agree that male ppl who transition into being perceived as gay women with their partners etc have the same intent as fratbros joking abt being dykes. i think they just occupy a space that previously was almost impossible back when physical transition wasn't a thing. they're still struggling to find their own space. yes, they did (and still do) really bad shit to homosexuals and female ppl as a community. i know that firsthand. but i also have seen people transition that way and i think it's always annoyingly more complex than it is at first glance. but i REFUSE to give up exclusive female4female & male4male spaces. i refuse to not hold heterosexual ppl accountable for their consistent homophobia, especially transfems unfortunately due to their male socializing & body differences that causes a power imbalance. though i have seen transmascs who date bio men and say the wildest shit ever, or even trick bio gay men into having sex with them without telling them. like stuff is getting REALLY bad, truly unhinged, and i am worried. i just want to figure this stuff out, and i don't believe all trans ppl are doing this for evil reasons, or even callous reasons.

honestly, i do think the term lesbian has always been so fucking unique and uniquely marginalized. and many people born with dicks, transfems included, have been horrible to me & other biological lesbians. i think we have been denied basic respect for so long and pressured to the point of abuse for some of us. transitioning becoming more accessible makes this issue much worse and more pressing. personally, where i'm at right now is... i am okay with transfems who post-transition live passing as sapphic with their gfs etc (who at times are transfem too) using the term transbian. but i do think them using the word lesbian on its own just digs the knife deeper for the female4female community, the lesbian community, which before very recently - back when physical transition wasn't possible - was always 99.9% bio women and transmasc folks loving each other. it's a very specific term. it is heavily, extremely fetishized, and demonized, and belittled, and is an isolating af experience from a young age. they don't get it. of course they don't. yet their sexuality is extremely complex if they transition; they go from their relationships being shrugged off to facing lesbophobia. just like transmasc ppl who transition can date bio men and suddenly face homophobia. but that's those people immigrating into the experiences that homosexuals, exclusively same-sex/agab attracted people, were born into. they have had a life free of the paranoia of showing any attraction to their opposite sex. it must be confusing as fuck. it must be isolating. but it's not the same. it'll never be, and i think gay female ppl & gay male ppl have really tried to be accommodating... i do believe there can be wonderful spaces where everyone who lives perceived as gay/bi men, or as gay/bi women, can have their respective gay & sapphic spaces that are trans-inclusive. i also believe that we need our exclusive male4male and female4female spaces too. we need a space to let loose and bond over stuff.

i think it would be immensely healthy for trans people who transition into living as gay to form their own specific terms for that. i think right now they exist in a very awkward in-between place where they try to make gay/lesbian terms match. but they're constantly upset when homosexual culture doesn't magically stretch itself to include them at every turn, they view it as an attack and a rejection, bc they don't realize same-sex attracted ppl have unique experiences too. they accept t4t but not us. and at times they're butting into a culture they can't really comprehend, same as if a bio gay guy went into a club full of transmasc people who live as gay men. there would be a totally different vibe, a different culture, and i think it upsets trans ppl to think that they're different. even though it's 10000% OKAY to be different, you need to come to terms with it. it can be dysphoria-triggering, that makes total sense... but it's not healthy for them to try to utterly deny their sex/agab and shove themselves into a box they are incapable of fitting into and pretend that they were always in that box and they 1000% understand that box and anyone who says they were never in that box before or that they're new in it and need to be respectful is just a horrible bigot. anyone making homosexual-specific inside jokes etc are being exclusionary meanies. it's not fucking healthy for them OR for female4female & male4male people. we're all marginalized in different ways, and it's not earning them any favors from us. which actually only isolates them more!

transfems haven't returned the allyship that female ppl so often show them, and especially did earlier on when it wasn't so girldick-in-your-face in lesbian spaces and homosexual-shaming as it is now. i will personally, where i'm at right now writing this, accept the term transbian to mean someone who has immigrated into the experience of being perceived as a lesbian, faces misogyny & lesbophobia, and may live that way for 30-40+ years or their whole ass lives doing so. i still will consider them my sisters and want to bond over the similarities and differences in our experiences. but they need to fucking understand what they've done, as a group, to bio lesbians and just female4female ppl. and how bio men & transfems are born into privilege, and that doesn't just all shed away the second they grow tits or get surgeries. i will accept transbian for now. but i think them saying they're lesbian women outright has started to feel insensitive to the current cultural tensions within lgbt, and the misogyny & lesbophobia their community has brought us. all the threats and sexual abuse & guilt-tripping they throw at us, in very male ways. i do believe there's absolutely lovely trans women who i wouldn't even recognize as trans and find common ground with when we both talk about our girlfriends and how shitty society treats lesbian-passing couples. i think homosexual bio men tend to be better at asserting their boundaries bc female folks are taught to be meek and subservient growing up. but we've finally had enough. it took me meeting trans women who tell me "hey, it's really fucked up how my community treats lesbians. i'm sorry. you deserve better" for me to really start to process my anger. bc it could've been so simple!! but it wasn't. it still isn't. i want transfem allies to rise up and show the fuck up for homosexual female folks. for the og lesbians. i will welcome transbians, personally, but not in all context. and i don't expect them to welcome me in transbian-exclusive context either. i want actual allyship. i know this isn't me fully agreeing with you anon, we still disagree on certain aspects of this. but your ask did help me. and i want you to know i don't take shit from misogynistic transfems, i don't let opposite-sex attracted transfems to speak over homosexuals, i demand mutual respect. opposite-sex attracted trans people who live as gays irl post-transition occupy a very weird space. i want to open up dialogue about that with them and between homosexuals too. at the very least, more and more transfems are peaking and properly apologizing & showing up for us. little by little.

i don't know where i am about opposite-sex attracted transmascs using gay. for me, personally, i don't really mind bc it doesn't have the same impact as lesbians having male bodies pressured onto them. i would need to talk to more male4male people, including bio gay men and transfems who are only into other male people. i know some transmascs use the term achillean, and other things like that. some also use gay to mean being same-sex attracted, often they're transmasc4transmasc (and can reclaim lesbian if they so desired, or make new terms). i deeply care for both homosexual rights and people who are genuinely trans and transitioning into new experiences. i'm still trying to learn more and find a middle ground. i know i'm a nicefem by radblr standards or whatever, but whatever.

so yeah, anyways. thank you sm for this ask! it really did stir my brain. i know this isn't as satisfying as if i had outright agreed with you after all this, but i tend to have more nuanced takes since i've been deep in the trans community as a detrans woman and seen how complex life is for people who transition into a gay-passing life. i'm still learning and gathering my thoughts. asks like these really do help.

we need to stand our ground gyns. we need to fight for homosexual rights. we need ppl who immigrate into our experiences to show us basic respect and not demand us to do conversion therapy on ourselves or stop making community inside jokes, just erase all our history to make space for them. we can have overlapping experiences without forgetting to celebrate our differences too. we can have trans-inclusive gay spaces and homosexual-only spaces and trans-exclusive spaces. we can literally have it all and coexist! & they need to start holding their bigots & creeps accountable. we need them to figure this shit out. i get that being a hetero person living as gay, thriving in that way as they're more than welcome to, can be really confusing and isolating and frustrating. but they can't keep doing this to other marginalized communities. it's just not fucking fair.

[devine-fem]

I kinda love your internalized homophobia Damian hc... It makes so much sense

In Damian's cultures homosexuality is a very "don't show,don't tell" mindset ingrained into their society. Not only in Arab and Asian culture,but brown culture as a whole. I feel like as a queer brown person I can absolutely say in this white dominated fandom,queer yt ppl dont really understand how culture will affect how you see queerness. It's not exactly a bad thing too,just a fact of life that affects queer brown ppl.

I think the only way Damian would see lgbt matters is that they're something that's there,but not as important in his mind compared to other subjects.

Like I believe Damian's VERY knowledgeable on women's rights and women's struggles not only because of how integral it is to history but because he grew up with a single mother who faced those issues in her life. You can't tell me Talia raised him otherwise- plus the only other child he had contact with was his female cousin,who undoubtedly faced such issues while Damian didnt. He would want to learn from her perspective as well,since it's a learning opportunity AND to understand his family on a deeper level.

On lgbt history however,Damian has no experience with. He understands that people have other experiences and partners than the heteronormatity he's grown up with,but he definitely wouldn't understand things like pride month. It's just something he has no experience of,so ofc he's not gonna understand.

It's just like western culture,which Damian clearly has troubled assimilating into. I know there's countries that have "lax" visions on homosexuality,but for YEARS Damian didn't even show romantic interest in girls. Why would he show interest in learning about homosexuality in his cultures if he barely sees ANYONE as romantic interests? Honestly I can see Damian looking at girls and boys similarly for years: they're just people. And Damian struggles to be vulnerable with people,no matter the sex or gender.

I also see Damian not understanding when he gradually sees boys and girls in the same way ROMANTICALLY. It'd be a very hard pill to swallow. Not only is it a whole new experience,but now he's different compared to all of his family members. AGAIN!! This hc has my heart now bc of how much it'd stick to his character struggles,and in dur time,the acceptances he'll make with them...

Tldr: yr hc is very valid and very humanizing!!

Yes, internalized homophobia Damian will always be the strongest horseman. I always write him with internalized homophobia, I mean it barely changes anything.

A lot of people scream that it’s problematic that Damian doesn’t know queer culture but it’s just not true. I fully embrace that part of his character and will always perpetuate that propaganda.

It will always be interesting breaking down any facet of Damian’s relationship with his sexuality. Some things he’s done and said in regard to his sexuality I see right for him in canon, others not so much but internalized homophobia is definitely a something that reigns supreme for me.

[skullytotheark]

Hi Hi!

I don't usually share my art here BUT lately i've been growing more comfortable w/ ppl seeing my art [as u can tell w/ latest creepyhornets entry]

So I wanted to share My some drawings i did for my fanfic series!

Click more for Art!

[i have alot of readmores on my post so i can navigate my account easier LOL]

Tobias Rogers / "The Colorado Axeman"

Age: 19 [current/present age in fanfic]

As you may remember from the last time i shared his design, His jacket is heavily inspired by the reboot buttt I did eventually change it to better fit his 'colour pallet' [or colours i associate toby with heavily]. Now having a slight 'foresty' colour pallet associated with him in this canon

Lore:

At this stage Toby is struggling alot w/ his own thoughts on Slender to the point he regrets Becoming a proxy in the first place. After returning to his old burnt down house Toby finds a old metal box that contained his sister's jacket. To this day Toby wears the jacket as asort of comfort and kinda like a pass me down jacket as memories of once were begin to haunt him, Along with 'unsuspected guests"

Age 16 / year one proxy: [Past Toby]

For a very good while i've been struggling w/ a 'year one' toby design but within time the og hoodie grew on me, So i gave him the og hoodie but I removed the blue hood. As you may know, Toby was much younger when he became a proxy in my au. Spending most of his time homeschooled within a tense household

Lore:

At this stage Toby had just killed his father and narrowly escaped, Unknowing hypnotized Toby believes that he owes Slender his LIFE to the point he's willing to serve Slender with every order.

Chernabog / 'Eyeless Jack'

Ever since Chernabog joined Slender as a proxy or servants of sorts. Chernabog or better known as eyeless jack dawns a somewhat iconic / original inspired design. A black jumpsuit along with a balaclava underneath his iconic mask [also i'm still VERY new to drawing plus size characters [im also kinda proud how it came out] and kinda hc him to be slighty plus size. Mostly cuz i wanted him to have a unique silhouette comapired to other characters. That and I also think it'd add to intimidation if you just see this 6'7 silhouette in the darkness watching you]

Lore:

Some time after agreeing to work for the Operator / Slenderman, Chernabog better known as Eyeless Jack. Roams inbetween towns collecting fresh meat not only for the Operator but for himself with his new boss's permission.

I know you've probably seen this but I really like how this came out for being a slightly rushed doodle, Featuring The Operator and my Oc Grimace! Grimace has his own little entry into my fanfic series and will have entries featuring him every now and then!

The Idea for The Operator's design in my au is kinda to be more tree like! In this image the tentacles Slender is known for comes from the roots at the base of his feet [at his feet?? I mean idk if he has feet or not at this current point. I mean he might] he also appears somewhat statue and organic like, As if a human was kinda made from bark, roots and what not. I also just really love drawing Slender like this it's funny

--

That's all I think i can share for Creepyhornets so far But i've been really happy with how some of these drawings are coming out. I dont say it much but i'm extremely proud of the process i've made with this year even though i only just started spending time on practicing how to draw. If I showed u before & after of my art you'd def see alot of progress

Anyway that's all for this post! I'll try to draw some more creepyhornets related stuff eventually! Hopefully draw more of these two since I'm happy with how they came out with my latest drawings

[xtabithanala]

Can you write Headcanons for Sejanus and Persephone friendship au bc I Headcanon them to e friends due to a fic I read in ao3

Also who do you ship Sejanus with?! I believe that Sejanus is better of with Marcus, Lysistrata or anyone else but Snow

I also have this hc of Persephone genuinely liking Sejanus. In my hc Sejanus knew about how badly the Price family struggled and, as the Plinth family had more money than the Price family, Sejanus would often bring cookies, bread or other small bits of food for Persephone because he saw she never had any lunch at school.

When pneumonia made the rounds at the Academy, Sejanus was among the few to check on Persephone. He even begged his mother to give medicine because the Price family couldn't afford it yet either.

The Plinths and the Prices didn't mind each other. Nero wasn't fond of the Districts and what the war caused him to do but he knew that experiences change people so he wanted to give them a chance.

Persephone would work with Sejanus in group projects when Festus wasn't there. She thought it was great how Sejanus didn't hesitate to speak up for where he came from. When learning of Sejanus' passing, she was distraught. She'd often look at photos of her classmates and would tear up at the friendship she once had with the boy who was seen as so different to everyone else. Persephone knew all too well that Strabo Plinth's death was not natural and not an accident. Coriolanus killed him.

When Persephone got the chance to speak to Coriolanus shortly before Katniss executed Snow, she told him that he killed the only person who genuinely cared about him without judgement. A friend.

And if I'm honest, I don't really ship Sejanus with anyone but I think he and Marcus or he and Lysistrata would seem most likely. I don't mind ppl writing or shipping Snowjanus but it seems very unlikely to me. Coriolanus hated Sejanus too much to ever feel any kind of love or empathy for him