#also i just really love watching all three of them hit the bottom of the barrel and then come together and support each other
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Can you do one where Paige is just like really giving off golden retriever vibes, like she’s so happy and in love, and someone makes a comment to Azzi after she does something funny (like the yelling on the court randomly) about how they don’t understand how she handles her because Paige can be a lot and Azzi not only puts them in their place but also gives off the “I’m in love, I’m obsessed, we were made for each other” vibe
Built Different
Note: I tried.
Practice at UConn doesn’t have off days.
It doesn’t matter if it’s midseason, if the team’s sore, if class schedules are tight. The expectation’s the same: intensity, excellence, discipline. Every drill, every rep, every scrimmage.
And Paige Bueckers? She is the standard.
She’s already dripping sweat ten minutes in, barking calls, clapping her hands on defense, chest bumping teammates after good plays, and snatching the ball off the rebound like it belongs to her by law. Her energy doesn’t waver. If anything, it fuels the gym. Makes people sharper. Louder. Better.
“Talk on that screen!” she shouts, directing the weak side. “We’re not gonna give up soft looks all day.”
She’s demanding but no one takes it personal. This is Paige. Captain. Heartbeat. Always first to give credit, first to take accountability, first to sprint back when someone gets beat.
“She’s the engine,” Coach had said last week, watching her rally the team during a sluggish morning stretch. “When she’s locked in, we all are.”
And today? She’s locked the hell in.
So is Azzi.
While Paige works the tempo and the talk, Azzi plays like she’s laser-cut from discipline. No wasted movement. Every screen, every backdoor cut, every closeout is textbook. She’s so locked into the flow of the game, it’s like she’s already two plays ahead.
They don’t say much during drills. They don’t need to. Paige drops dimes without looking. Azzi’s always right where she should be.
When Paige hits her on a wraparound pass for a corner three, Azzi lets it fly and Paige lets out a low whistle.
“Wifey is a fucking sharp shooter,” she mutters under her breath, grinning as she jogs backward, completely unbothered by the fact that Azzi is very much pretending not to hear her.
⸻
They’re running shell drill, full-contact, rotating through five-on-five halfcourt sets. Paige forces a turnover and sprints it coast-to-coast, finger-rolling it in and immediately throws both arms in the air like she just won the Finals.
Then she jogs backward toward Azzi with this big, dorky grin. “Did you see that?” she pants. “That was kind of fire, right? Like Kyrie if he had better hair.”
Azzi, holding back a smile, doesn’t even glance at her. “Get back on D.”
“Babe, I did a euro into a spin step-through. For me? That’s art.”
“Cool,” Azzi deadpans. “The scoreboard says 0–0.”
Paige just laughs and jogs away, mumbling, “Hater.”
⸻
They keep going.
KK swipes the ball the next trip down and yells, “Cookies!” while sprinting in transition.
Paige runs her down, blocks her at the rim, and smacks the glass for good measure.
“Try again,” she grins, walking it up the court. “You’re not like that.”
KK just grins. “One day I’ll humble you.”
“Bet,” Paige fires back, already calling the next set.
The whole squad is going at it. No easy buckets. No fake love. Every girl in the gym wants to win.
But the respect? It’s built-in. It’s earned.
⸻
After awhile they finally take a water break.
Paige is bouncing in place, dripping sweat but smiling like she just discovered joy for the first time.
She reaches over and tugs the bottom of Azzi’s practice jersey. “You know I passed up a layup for that dime to you, right? Like…that was love.”
Azzi raises an eyebrow. “It was literally a two-on-one.”
“Exactly,” Paige says proudly. “And you’re my one.”
Ice groans audibly. “Please. I’m begging you both to be normal.”
Paige just grins and leans her head on Azzi’s shoulder. “Can’t help it. I’m in love with a sniper.”
Azzi sips her water and shoves her off with one hand. “You’re such a dork.”
“Yeah, but I’m your dork,” Paige says, absolutely beaming.
⸻
Later, they’re rotating through free throws at the end of practice, sweat-soaked and heavy-breathing. The gym’s finally quieted a little, the kind of focused calm that only comes after an hour of hell.
Paige is leaning on the scorer’s table, joking with KK and Ice in between shots, still bouncing on the balls of her feet like she’s got gas in the tank.
She’s tired… but she never stops moving.
“I swear,” KK says, shooting Azzi a smirk as she wipes her face with her jersey. “Your girl doesn’t shut up. Ever. Like, how do you handle all that?”
It’s light. Familiar. Everyone’s smiling. No one’s mean.
But Azzi lifts her eyes slowly, cool and direct.
She doesn’t raise her voice. Doesn’t roll her eyes. Just says, calm as anything:
“She’s not a lot. She’s Paige. She’s a leader.”
KK straightens a little, caught off guard.
Azzi dribbles once, spins the ball in her hands.
“She talks because she cares. Because she sees things before they happen. Because she’s been through everything we’ve been through and more and still shows up first in and last out.”
She shoots. Net.
“Everyone in here wants to win,” Azzi says, catching her own rebound. “But Paige? She wants all of us to win. That’s different.”
KK nods slowly, serious now. “Respect.”
Paige hears it all, but doesn’t say a word.
She just watches Azzi from across the paint, her smile quieter now. Softer. Like something in her chest just fell into place.
Azzi doesn’t look over. But she knows.
⸻
In the locker room afterward, Paige comes out of the showers in her slides and practice shorts, hair wrapped in a towel, still humming like someone just gave her a puppy.
She plops next to Azzi on the bench and nudges her with her knee. “Hey.”
Azzi glances up. “Hmm?”
“You love me.”
Azzi gives her a sideways look. “You just now figuring that out?”
“No, I just like hearing it,” Paige says brightly. “Especially after you verbally dunked on KK for me. That was so hot.”
Azzi scoffs, hiding her smile. “You’re literally the most annoying person I’ve ever met.”
Paige leans over kissing Azzi’s forehead before laying her head on her shoulder. “But I’m also your favorite person you’ve ever met, right?”
Azzi sighs. “Unfortunately.”
“Yessss,” Paige whispers, grinning like she just won the lottery.
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M.A.T.T. - Matt sturniolo



Since streamer Matt is back <3
Also based on the new twitch stream all of them did.
Don’t like? Don’t read?
Summary: nick, Matt, Chris all play Fortnite for a bit, trying to keep y/n and Matt relationship a secret but Matt is making that hard really to do. But he keeps his act so y/n doesn’t get hate. but fuck… y/n is looking fucking hot…
Paring: fem!reader + gamer!matt
Warnings: SMUT, secret relationship, strong language, disagreement, , oral (Fem!receiving), pet names (slut, ma etc?), getting caught, etc.
A/N: HOLY FUCK I LOVE MATT STURNIOLO BUT ALSO CHRIS?😻 I can’t decide tbh. Switched the name.
————————————————————
Y/ns pov
“Fuck!” Matt yells from dying on Fortnite for the 5th time. You’ve been the triplets friends since…. You don’t even know… maybe since you guys were 2 or 3? I don’t know, but you moved into their place with them and now you and Matt are basically attached together. Nobody knows but Chris and nick.
You get up from his (Matt’s) bed and walk over to nick, Matt, and Chris all taking turns playing rounds of Fortnite. The chat starts to spam “hi y/n” “I love her sm”
Matt looks over at me and smiles and you smile back. Chris hits him and gives him the eyes of “don’t fucking do that, they’ll know you dumbass” Matt flinch’s but doesn’t say anything. You stand watching the game till you look over and see how much people are watching.
Your eyes go wide and you start feeling your anxiety to rise. You let a sigh out and sit beside Chris on the bead as Matt plays the game, soon to be nicks turn. You zone out staring at Matt. Why can’t he use his fingers on me like he does with that controller? Why can’t I be his good girl and he’ll pound into me like I’m a little toy? Fuck… is all you can think.
You start to feel wet at the thoughts you’re having of Matt. Matt loses the game “fuck sakes!” He yells and passes the controller to nick. You clench your thighs together and Chris looks at you and whispers “are you okay y/n?” You slowly turn your head towards Chris. “I-I’m fine.” You stutter. Chris raise his eyebrow at you considering you don’t stutter much.
you sigh and try to keep you cool but you can’t at the thought of Matt being rough on you. Nick eventually loses and Chris takes the controller and plays the game, a little bit after Chris loses “fuck!” Chris yells. “Do you guys just wanna play trios?” Matt asks. “sure” nick and Chris both agree.
Nick and Chris get up and leave the room leaving you and Matt alone with the stream. You get up and sit beside Matt while he sets up the stream. He gets it all set up and they ready up for the game. Matt mutes his mic fast and whispers in your ear so no one can read his lips. “I’m going to fucking pound into to you after the stream.”
He pulls his head away and smirks at you as you look at him and your eyes go wide. You blush at the thought of that happening. He unmutes his mic “Matt! Fucking stop!” Chris yells trying to get not to get you and Matt caught. “Sorry sorry..” Matt answers. They land on the bottom right of the map. They get the medallion and drive around.
————————————————————
“Alright guys we’re going to go now, see you guys soon!” Matt says as everyone in the chat says goodbye and all three of the triplets throw up the peace sign and Matt ends the stream. “You going to keep your word?” You ask Matt. “Fuck yes.” He says as he picks you up and brings you to his bed. “your fucking slut, trying to think I don’t know your wet? I heard you stutter”
You stare up at Matt with a little shock after admitting he heard you stutter to Chris. Matt smashes his lips into yours, making a full on make out sesh. He tugs on your waistband of your pyjama pants. He pulls it right off along with your underwear. He pull his pants down with his boxers also. He takes your shirt and rips it off.
“No bra?” Matt smirks. “Matt! That was a good shirt!” You scold Matt. “Sorry ma. I’ll buy you a new one.” You roll your eyes at Matt response. “Fucking roll your eyes at me again I’ll fuck them till they get stuck.” He threatens you. “Don’t threaten me with a good time.” You reply. He chuckles at your answer and moves his face in Between your thighs.
He kisses along your inner thighs and gets to your aching core. He moved his lips to your clit. “oh fuck” you moan softly. He sucks and licks your clit making you a moaning mess. He puts his two fingers in your hole making you gasp at the sudden pleasure. You wrap your fingers in between his brown locks as you let whimpers out of your mouth.
Your legs start squeezing Matt’s head. You now have your legs wrap around Matt’s head as he eats you out. “Fuck Matt!” You moan. You thrust your hips into Matt face. He sticks his tongue into your hole making you whimper loudly. “Matt! Close!” You moan.
“Wait a sec” he mumbles against your core, sending waves of pleasure through out your body. “Please!” You yell. “now you can.” He says and the knot in your stomach snaps and you moan. He starts cleaning your juices and you start to feel him writing something. M.A.T.T. Right on your core.
he slides his finger on his chin, wiping up your release off his chin and he licks its off his finger. “Fuck y/n… you taste so good” he groans. He kisses you and you groan at the taste of your self in his mouth. He lays your head down on the pillows and crawls up to you and hovers above you.
He sucks on your neck leaving big purple hickey on your neck, obvious you guys either had a hot make out or had sex, and obviously one is very true. He teases you by sliding his tip against your slits. “Please don’t tease matt” you beg but moan at the same time. He slides himself into your core. Your pussy swallowing his dick. You scrunch your face at the pain because you forgot he’s big.
“m-Matt don’t move too big..” you whine. “Are you okay?” “M-mhm” you grunt. He kisses your collarbone to distract you from the pain. The pain slowly turns pleasure. “o-okay you can move.” You tell him as he smirks and slowly moves his hips. He slowly makes his pace faster and faster. He eventually hits your g spot “fuck Matt!” You scream. “I found it” he smirks as he talks.
He grabs my hips to fasten his pace a bit more. You start to arch your back from the pleasure. “Fuck y/n…” he groans. “Hey ma- HOLY SHIT!” “Matt! FUCKING JESUS” nick and Chris yell. Matt grabs a blanket and puts it over you guys. “Fucking leave!” Matt yells. You stare at nick and Chris as you look fucked out. They close the door almost immediately.
“Jesus fucking Christ..” he Mumbles. He starts to thrusts his hips more than he did he before. He grabs his belt that he had on before. He wraps his belt around your hands, tying your arms behind your back and he starts pounding into to you, his balls slapping against you clit each thrust.
“Ohh fuckk Matt!” You moan. “Fuck your tight..” he groans as he pumps inside of you at an every fast pace. He speeds his pace making not able to even say a thing but his name. “MATT!” You scream. You feel the knot in your stomach start to feel the knot almost snap. “C-cum!” You yell. “go ahead.” He grunts. You release as soon as he opens his mouth. “Humghh matt!” You moan as you cum.
“Fuckk” he groans as he releases his cum into your pussy, painting your walls completely white. He falls down beside you as his cum leaks out of you. He gets up and hovers above you. He start licking your stomach and starts to spell something. M.A.T.T. Right a cross your stomach. He backs up and smirks at you. He leans up and kisses you.
Matt gets up and walks over to the washroom, grabbing a wet cloth so you don’t have all cum over you guys. He cleans you both up and he helps you put all your clothes back on. You go to get up to go get water but your legs are more wobbly than a broken Chair. You sit back down and whine. Matt chuckles at you and goes to go get water in the kitchen.
————————————————————
Matt’s pov
I go get up to get water for y/n considering she can’t walk from the way I fucked her. I walk to the kitchen and see nick and Chris. The silence is very awkward since when Chris and nick walked into the room from when me and y/n were fucking.
I grab a cup and fill it up with water. “hey Matt..?” Chris questions. “yup?” I answer with an attitude. “why after the stream.” Chris questions again. I stare at the water that’s in the cup. “why not?” I ask. “can’t really see you the same bro, kinda weird.” Chris says. I take a glare at him. “Cool.” I answer coldly.
I start to walk back to y/n.
End of Matt’s pov
————————————————————
Y/ns pov
Matt comes back with your cup of water. “Here” Matt says softly. You take the cup and take a sip of the water. “you gotta go piss. You’re going to get a UTI.” Matt says. “oh yeah.” You answer. “can you help me?” You ask Matt. “Yes I can.” He chuckles as he walks to you and takes you to the bathroom.
He plops you down on the toilet and you start peeing. He helps you up and takes you back to the bed. You lay down and he hovers above you. He lays his head on your stomach. He slides his finger all around your stomach as you play with his hair. He starts to spell something. M.A.T.T. He’s done it almost all over now.
Because your M.A.T.T.S.
————————————————————
A/N
got lazy wit it at the end😻
I think i gotta go write a chapter Thing on Wattpad now..
BYE BUTCHS🤗
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not so secret identity | m.g. x gn!reader
“if you could have any powers in the world, what would you choose?” asking the random question while you and mark are laying in his backyard, just staring at the sparkling stars. you stretched an arm up, like you were trying to touch them. “i’d like to be like atom eve. her powers are almost god like, or just anything kinda mysterious slash magical. looks more fun than just brute strength.”
your free arm was pressed against mark’s chest, his fingers just mindlessly rubbing over skin and bone. “strength is good though, you know you’ll always be able to protect yourself and those close to you.” turning his head to the side, admiring you. someone he wants to keep safe and happy from this darkening world, but you don’t know that other side.
a smile spread across your lips, “with these new muscles you’ve suddenly developed i can see it.” now turning to rest on your side, hand propping up your head. “i’d definitely would have posters of your superhero persona on my walls. ‘oh he’s just so dreamy’.”
mark smiled shyly, “and you’d be a bombshell for anyone with eyes. but i’ll know that i’m the one you love, so i’m not bothered by some guys. but i’ll still protect you from creeps if you had the powers and i didn’t.”
his words made you feel mushy. leaning closer towards mark’s face, your puckered lips pressed into the cooling skin of his cheeks. dotting along his jaw leading to his nose, higher up leaving sweeping caresses on his eyelids. bits of your hair fanned over your profile, “wanna watch a movie? getting a bit cold and sleepy out here.” whispering to him.
he immediately moved from the ground, taking your outstretched arm and then effortlessly throwing you over his shoulders. you couldn’t help the loud surprised yelp leaving your mouth, “mark!” playfully hitting his back.
and mark retaliated by smacking your ass, the sting making a warmth grow in your stomach. “still wanna watch a movie?” he cockily remarked.
-
“look at you hottie! got a nice glow about you more these days.” william commented after you hugged him in greeting then sat across from him for your lunch hang.
digging your teeth in your bottom lip you had to withhold all the…intimate details from the night before. even if you do like having someone that also thinks your boyfriend is extremely sexy, but boundaries. “random mark related question, but do-do you think he’s gotten bulky lately? i swear he’s twice the size then he was about three months ago. not that i’m complaining though.” subconsciously thumbing over a blooming bruise on your thigh.
william shrugged, “he’s a straight guy with a girlfriend. probably just decided to really hit the gym one day, not that he was scrawny before, but you know.” and that ended mark related conversation for now. both of you just dived into work gossip or something either of you heard in the halls, trying to set up future plans with eve and amber also involved.
while you were laughing at a joke william made, you felt a sudden shaking. both of you went silent to tell if there was gonna be an after shock, but it was worse when someone was violently thrown into a building just across the street from the cafe. you and william ducked to the ground, legs turning to jelly at the sight of something so horrific just an arms length from you.
“we gotta go!” someone yelled in your ear followed with a yanking on your arms. your knees scraped the gravel as you tried to steady your self, barely taking a step before you were shoved to the floor causing an agonizing pain shooting through your muscles. “william!” calling for your friend who wasn’t in your sights.
what was in your sights was a mangled human, blood and spit dropping from their lips to the ground. a deep panting causing their chest to puff, huffs of thick air almost cartoonish from their nostrils. they reared their head then started rushing like a bull, it was like a horror scene where you want to run but just can’t take your eyes off the assailant. you thought this was the end, you just closed your eyes, waiting for any impact.
but it never came. your heart started pounding faster, eyes slowly fluttering open to see that monster straining against the resistance of invincible. you couldn’t see the hero’s full face due to the bright yellow mask disguising him, but you could see how his teeth were gritting together so hard they could crack. it was a tug of strength, invincible’s feet were planted firmly on the ground as he pushed most of his upper body forward.
“g-go! now!” he yelled out. he groaned due to the sudden distraction, grunting when the criminal tried pushing him off and he just pushed back. his jaw was flexed and you couldn’t help tilting your head to the side, a bit of curiosity seeping in.
“mark?” speaking your boyfriend’s name.
he looked down at you for a moment, “run!” then grabbed the monster’s head and rammed his knee into its face. he threw a fast punch into the chest causing him to create a bit of distance for the two of you. he gripped your upper arms, made sure your legs were okay, and gave a quick peck to your forehead. then he returned to the action.
watching a moment longer, fighting the conflict in your chest, turning on your heel you made your way towards the police barricade. looking over your shoulder you tried to catch sight of mark again, but two hands held your shoulders and turned you away from the destruction. “oh thank god,” william sighed as he pulled you in tight for a hug, your own arms taking a moment before wrapping around his waist and gripping his red shirt in your grasp.
“do you know about mark?” whispering into his ear. william jerked his head back, a furrow on his brow. “what about mark? did something happen?”
“mark and invincible in one sentence, what do you see?” trying for a different route. you took note of how his eyes kept darting, going from you to the conflict, and it was like you almost can see wheels turning in his brain.
“no, no there’s no way.” he stook his head, “you’re just stressed and there’s adrenaline running around. let’s get you home and we’ll call mark to check on him.” steering both of you further away, you sneaked a peek over your shoulder, barely a standing figure there invincible was. watching you walk away.
-
you just laid in your bed, eyes burning a hole in your ceiling while you rubbed your fingers over your elbows. small things were starting to piece together in your mind, new cuts and bruises popping up every other day, those dumb excuses of ‘oh forgot to grab my umbrella be right back’ when it was a sunny day. god the new build, how he’d somehow manages to find amazing authentic food in your boring town.
you were just blinded by mark. sure you never thought he was cheating or something like that, but sometimes yeah, you never really thought about his behavior. mark’s always been awkward.
a knock at your door filled the silent room. you didn’t bother responding since the door slowly creaked open, looking over just as mark meekly poked his head through the crack. those sad puppy eyes observing you, “can i come in?” his voice soft, patient.
“yeah,” a tiny crack on the a. mark moved slowly, trying not to startle a baby deer. he sat beside your hip, the bed dipping slightly from his added weight. a large hand hovering in the air before retreating back to his side, not sure what those turn of events caused.
“how’d you get home?” his first question. a deep sigh through your nose, “william drove me. funny how he parked further away cause there weren’t any spots.” barely a huff at the stupidity.
“do-do you want to talk about…invincible?” his second question. you stayed silent longer this time, out of anger or frustration or any other emotion you could be feeling at this moment. a laughed bubbled from your chest when you suddenly remembered yesterday’s conversation.
“what?” mark leaned in closer, inspecting you. tears gathered at your lash line, “we were freaking talking about if we had powers last night. that honestly could have been the best time to casually bring it up.” giving a half assed swat to his bicep.
the tension seemed to dissolve a bit since mark laid down behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and tugging you back to fit snug against his toned chest. you easily intertwined your hands together over your stomach.
mark pressed a kiss to the base of your neck before setting his chin on your shoulder, “you know how it’s pretty common superhero’s don’t flaunt their identity, even to close family.” you hummed, already understanding why he wasn’t screaming this news from the rooftops.
“it would’ve been nice to at least know. it would be the same amount of anxiety without or with your powers, i get anxious when you disappear or-or just make terrible excuses.” barely sending a glance behind you, “you may be superhuman, but you still have a heart and brain, and those two organs are vital to your breathing. so if you just died one day out there i wouldn’t know or hear the real reason.”
your throat was getting choked up, it just hit you. he could die, every time he goes out there in that costume, he might not come home one day. “i can’t lose you this early, mark.” closing your eyes, wet tears kissing your cheeks in silent empathy.
“hey, hey.” there was a bit of shuffling then a hand to your face. “sweetheart, look at me please.” a scrunch of your features before fluttering your reddening eyes open to see mark peering at you. you brought your own hand to his left cheek, thumb rubbing under his eye and along his nose.
“i’ll always make it out a fight alive. will i look pretty? probably the complete opposite, but as long as i feel my heart beating and feel my chest moving, i’ll come crawling back to you.”
two pairs of eyes stared into the windows of their souls, simultaneously grieving all the unknown pain yet to come, all the joy that’ll make up just a fraction of your life. mark leaned in and pressed his lips to yours, you could feel a healing cut along his bottom lip. it caused a few more tears to spawn, but you chose to ignore them, you only wanted to focus on the now.
#mark grayson#mark grayson x gn!reader#mark grayson fluff#mark grayson imagine#mark grayson angst#mark grayson fic#mark grayson x reader#invincible x gn!reader#invincible angst#invincible imagine#invincible x you#invincible x reader#invincible fluff#invincible fic#invincible
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endlessly
written for @steddielovemonth day twenty eight “endlessly” by the cab | rating: t | wc: 2,1k | tags: post s4, three years in the future, established relationship, marriage proposal, fluff
read on ao3
There’s a shop down the street where they sell plastic rings for a quarter a piece and Eddie swears it might be his favorite thing about his and Steve’s apartment in Chicago.
Well, no. He really loves that it’s only five minutes away from Buckley’s dorm and that it has a fire exit that’s often visited by their downstairs neighbor’s cat. And of course, he also loves living there with Steve.
But that little shop is pretty sick too. Eddie is constantly misplacing his rings, and this way, it’s easier for him to replace them.
He stops by once or twice every week, which in Steve’s opinion is too much.
“You only have ten fingers, Eds, how many rings can you possibly need?” He tells him every time, but he always asks Eddie to show him his most recent buy.
Today’s visit has gotta be quick. Steve is waiting for Eddie and the black pepper he sent him to get for his homemade chili. So it’s in and out of the shop in less than five minutes, a new black band secured in his pocket, before Eddie hurries back home.
But even if he does, Steve still lets out an impatient little huff when he arrives.
“There you are!” He says, walking over to Eddie– and grabbing the black pepper from his hands, ignoring him.
Eddie lets out an offended string of noises. “And what am I? Chopped liver?”
“No, you are late,” Steve chastises, but still presses a placating kiss to Eddie’s lips before going back to the sizzling saucepan.
Eddie follows him and hops on the counter, his legs dangling back and forth as he watches Steve stir. “Unless everyone’s hiding in our bathroom, and I would be impressed, given how small it is, there’s no one here yet so there’s no way I’m late,” Eddie says petulantly.
Steve rolls his eyes, adding the black pepper to the chili. “They’ll be here soon. Rob called to say she was leaving her dorm and the kids said they’d get here around two, and you know they’ll be starving from the three hour ride. And they’ll bitch if lunch isn’t ready.”
“They’ll bitch either way,” Eddie says with a snort. “If not because of the food, then for the fact that they’re all sleeping on the floor since we only have one couch.”
Their apartment is hardly the Harringtons’ mansion, and while it’s more than enough for Eddie and Steve, it doesn’t have multiple guest rooms and mattresses to fit nine people for a weekend.
Chuckling, Steve stirs the black pepper in. “You’re probably right, remind me why we agreed to this again?”
Eddie taps his bottom lip with his finger, pretending to think. “Mm, because you can’t say no to them, and because Lucas was excited to use his newly acquired license to get them all here. Oh, and because you miss them.”
“You miss them too,” Steve points out, one hand on his hip while the other brandishes the wooden spoon in front of Eddie’s face.
“I admit to nothing!” Eddie says, but the truth is that he does.
The last time they saw the kids was a couple of months ago, when he and Steve drove to Hawkins for Wayne’s birthday and it had really hit Eddie just how much they’ve grown in the time they were away. Mike had been taller than both him and Steve, Lucas had actual facial hair. El’s curls were almost as long as Eddie’s while Max had chopped hers off and was rocking a badass bob. Will had a boyfriend and Henderson had a goddamned tattoo, for God’s sake.
Needless to say that visit had left Eddie reeling, Steve too. And while they were both excited to see them and show them around Chicago over the weekend, neither is ready to see how many other things have changed since then.
God, is this how parents feel when they watch their kids grow up? Maybe all those jokes about him and Steve co-parenting these shitheads were right all along.
“Here, try this,” Steve says, snapping Eddie out of his spiral. He holds the spoon in front of Eddie’s lips for him to taste it in a move that’s become familiar since they moved in together. Eddie leans forward and takes it into his mouth.
Then he lets out a moan.
“Fuck, Steve,” he says, watching Steve’s cheeks go pink, either at the praise or the familiar obscene sound. “That’s so good, oh my God.”
Steve ducks his head, smiling. “Yeah?”
“Mhm,” Eddie hums, licking his lips. “I’d marry you for that alone.”
It’s hardly the first time Eddie has said that, but Steve’s reaction is the same as always. His cheeks pink up even more and a pleased bashful smile stretches over his lips. He puts the spoon in the sink and covers the saucepan to let the chili simmer before he stands between Eddie’s legs.
“You keep saying that, but I’ve yet to see the ring,” Steve says, teasingly, only Eddie’s mind goes to the ring in his pocket, the black band that would look so good in Steve’s ring finger–
And before he knows it, he’s jumping off the counter and dropping to his knees.
With a raised eyebrow, Steve takes half a step back. “Eds, you know I’d let you blow me for how good my food is any day, but the kids will be here soon–”
“Get your mind out of the gutter, Steve,” Eddie scoffs. “This isn’t that, although that chili is definitely blow job worthy.”
“Well, if it isn’t that then what are you doing down there?”
Hell if I know, Eddie thinks before digging into his jeans, taking the ring out.
Steve blinks down at it. “Did you stop by that shop again?”
“Yes,” Eddie says and before Steve can protest, he adds, “But this one isn’t for me. It’s for you.”
Steve’s eyebrows shoot up in his forehead and when Eddie holds it up to him, his eyes widen, his jaw going slack.
“Oh my god.”
Eddie clears his throat. “Steve, these last three years with you have felt like a dream. Most of the time, I still can’t believe they weren’t one. That I won’t wake up from a coma at that damned secret hospital to find that none of it happened or that I died that day in the Upside Down and this is actually heaven. Life with you is just that good, sweetheart. I’m the luckiest son of a bitch because I get to come home to you every day and wake up next to you and your ridiculously bad bed head.” At that, Steve makes the first noise since Eddie started his speech– a soft wet chuckle.
“And I might be pushing my luck here, Stevie, because half the time I think I don’t deserve you. You deserve a– a gold ring and a beautiful house and someone who doesn’t think that jeans without holes in them counts as formal wear. But while I might not be able to give you that, I can and I will love you endlessly. So, ignoring the fact that legally we can’t, because fuck society, will you, Steve Harrington, marry me?”
Steve’s mouth opens with a gasp but before Eddie can get his answer, the door to their apartment swings open and in walks Robin.
She learned the hard way to use the key that they gave her cautiously after she walked in on them going at it half naked in the kitchen. The only reason why she used it today is probably because she thought it was safe to do it, knowing that they wouldn’t get up to any funny business while they were expecting the kids.
She probably didn’t expect to walk in on this instead.
To be fair, Eddie didn’t expect to do this at all today.
“Boys, look who I ran into downstairs!” She says, holding the door open for the kids before freezing on the spot. “Oh my God!”
“They’re naked, aren’t they?” Dustin groans. That damn tone is the one thing that hasn’t changed at all.
Robin sputters. “Uh, no, they’re–”
“Oh my God!” Mike gasps, echoing Robin’s words as he steps in and sees Eddie on his knees in front of Steve, the ring still held between his fingers.
“What? What?” The others ask, trying to get a look while stuck behind Mike’s tall frame.
They see El’s head pop up under his arm. “Eddie is proposing to Steve!”
“What?” Max and Dustin shriek, shoving Mike out of the way and stumbling into the apartment with Lucas and Will in tow.
Lucas gasps. “Holy shit!”
“Did he say yes?” Will asks, glancing between the two.
Dustin gives his arm a light slap. “Of course he said yes, he’s just as obsessed with Eddie as Eddie is with him.”
“Actually,” Eddie cuts in, speaking for the first time since they all barged in. “He hasn’t, you shitheads interrupted him.”
“Dude!” Max lets out an indignant huff. “What are you waiting for?”
“Yeah, Steve!” The boys all agree, El’s wide eyes do too.
“Children–” Robin chastises, but Eddie can see the curious glint in her eyes.
“I–” Steve starts, finally saying something but he doesn’t get far before Eddie interrupts him.
“Stevie, it’s okay, you just can tell me later–”
He firmly shakes his head. “No, Eds, I don’t mind that the kids are here,” he says, his lips tugging upwards as he starts his own speech. “I don’t mind that you got that ring from that shop down the street that I insist you spend way too much time in, or that we live in this small apartment and that you only own a single pair of jeans without any rips on them. I don’t care about any of that because I love you, and I love our life, and nothing would make me happier than being married to you even if it’s not official. Actually, fuck that, we can have our own wedding and it can be real to us. All that matters is that I get to love you. Endlessly.”
Eddie gapes at Steve, his heart in his throat. He wants to say something, anything, but he’s afraid he might embarrass himself by starting to cry.
“Dude,” Mike says, breaking the silence for him. “That was so sappy.”
“Shhhh!” They all say in unison while Max delivers a slap to the back of his head.
Eddie can’t help but laugh– a happy, giddy sound. “No, Wheeler is right. That was sappy.”
Steve shoots him a betrayed look. “Shut up. You’re lucky they didn’t hear your speech!”
“Don’t act like it didn’t make you swoon,” he teases.
Steve’s cheeks go red. “You’re insufferable, I take it back, I won’t marry you.”
“No take backsies!” Eddie protests, grabbing Steve’s hand and sliding the ring on. “You’re stuck with me now.”
“I know,” Steve says, his smile tipping into something soft as he hauls Eddie to his feet so he can kiss him.
Their friends cheer but the sounds quickly turn into groans as they both get a little carried away with their kiss.
“Do you guys need us to go back to the car and give you a minute to be gross?” Lucas asks after a while.
Eddie feels tempted to say yes but before he can Dustin jumps in protest. “No way! We’ve been in that car for hours and I’m starving!”
Steve and Eddie exchange a bemused look. They know their kids well.
“Well, lunch is ready, so go wash up and then you shitheads can eat.”
As soon as Steve says it, they all barrel into the apartment, squeezing into their tiny bathroom so they can wash their hands, arguing over who goes first the whole time.
Robin closes the door behind her and hands Steve her key. “I don’t think it’s not safe for me to have that,” she says sheepishly.
Eddie snorts. “Your timing really is impeccable, Buckley.”
Pulling them both in for a hug, she says, “I love you, dinguses and I’m happy for you, but if you make anyone else your Maid of Honor, I’ll kill you.”
“We love you too,” Steve chuckles, and Eddie agrees with a nod.
She pulls away, heading to the bathroom so she can also wash up.
Steve wraps his arm around Eddie’s shoulders. “And I love you,” he says with a kiss to his temple. “Endlessly.”
Eddie intertwines his fingers with the hand that rests over his shoulder, feeling the ring on Steve’s finger. It causes a flutter in his chest.
“Yeah, Stevie,” he says, giving his fingers a squeeze. “Endlessly.”
#steddie#steddie fic#steddielovemonth#stranger things#stranger things fic#this event is SO important to me it's why i started writing steddie a year ago and i haven't stopped since#here's my last little contribution enjoy x#steve harrington#eddie munson#the party#monse writes
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Scratch My Back



Masterlist
Joel Miller x reader
word count: 889
Summary: The tide is pulling you under, just like it has plenty of times before. Your husband helps you communicate.
A/N: I’ve been struggling with my mental health & looking after myself for a long, long time and I was getting myself all psyched up to get a shower but I didn’t end up getting in and decided to write this lil thing that I’ve been thinking about for a while! I hope you enjoy it and if anyone out there is reading this and is struggling too, just know that you are not alone and that if Joel Miller were real, he would scratch your back❤️
Also thank you so much for 100 followers🥹🫶🏻 really brightened up my spirits a lil bit💓
Warnings: No Outbreak. Depiction of poor mental health. Sadness. One big loving man (it’s Joel Miller) (Not a warning but I didn’t want it to seem all doom and gloom😅) No use of Y/N.
To Joel, it was just a Wednesday, your day off. To you, the ceiling was caving in. Before he left for work you were sound asleep, your thoughts at bay, laying still against the sand, he placed a gentle kiss to your temple before rolling out of bed. Now that you were awake your thoughts were thrashing against the cliffs, the mental whiplash you were facing ultimately draining your body of all its energy.
You watch the clock on the bedside table blink from one minute to the next. You thought about all if the things you should probably be doing; showering, tidying the house, preparing that home cooked meal you’d been promising your husband for over a week but all you could do was slip in and out of sleep, that was the safe option, the one that would keep you somewhat sane until he returned. You didn’t want to bother him, didn’t want to text him those three words because you knew he would stop everything for you, everything would be put on hold so that he could soothe you and you didn’t want to add that onto the ever-growing list of things to feel bad about. So you waited.
“Honey?” His voice reverberated off the walls, the sound of his gentle tone floated up the stairs. You didn’t have the energy to shout back, the sound of his boots hitting the wooden steps told you that it wouldn’t be long until he was by your side anyway. He took in the sight of the drawn curtains, the sight of you facing them, still in your t-shirt and underwear and you felt the bed dip behind you, the warmth of his body encompassing yours, his scent filling your scenes.
“Something happen?” A gentle kiss placed to your shoulder blade, the feeling of his lungs emptying and filling behind your back soothing you. You shook your head, allowing a silence to draw over you both as Joel’s arms wrapped around your waist, tugging you further back into the curve of his body. He was always so patient with you, so tender.
“Scratch my back.”
Scratch my back, a cry for help. A promise made between two lovers. A rule established when you’d first started dating. Joel knew that you struggled with your mental health, you’d opened up to some extent, brushing him off with a ‘I’m having a tough day but I’ll be ok x’ text in the beginning, even then he gave you your space.
One week in spring however, everything was not okay. He hadn’t heard from you in four days, no text and definitely no phone calls. At first he thought that this was your way of letting him know you were no longer interested and selfishly, he couldn’t let it end that way. So after days of mulling it over and chewing his bottom lip raw, he drove over to your apartment and that’s where he found you, dark circles engulfing your eyes, threatening to swallowing them whole, hair unwashed, apartment flooded in gloom.
He took a bath with you, washed your hair as best he could. The spring air still had a slight chill to it so he’d made sure your new set of pyjamas were on the radiator ready for bed and he laid with you in silence until you turned into his chest and he felt the wet of your tears seep into the fabric of his shirt.
“You don’t have to talk to me.” He pressed a kiss into your hairline. “I don’t want you to ever feel like you have to talk to me, I mean obviously you can, when you feel comfortable and ready to but there is something I want you to do for me baby,” another soft kiss. Your eyes travelled up his face to finally look him in his eyes, those soft brown eyes that made you fall in love with him in the first place. All you could do was give a small nod, you would do anything he asked. “I want you to come up with a word or a phrase,” he continued, “so that when things get bad and you don’t feel like you can talk about it…” he trailed off, his hands drawing shapes up and down the length of your spine.
“Like a safe word?” He let out a huff of air at that, a small smile adorning his face.
“Yeah, kinda like a safe word, so I know that you’re safe,” his palm came to rest on your cheek, thumb cupping your jaw, “up here,” and his fingers tapped gently on the side of your temple.
“Scratch my back,” It was soft, the way it came out, tears threatening to spill over, “because if you promise to scratch mine, i’ll always scratch yours.” You couldn’t stop the tears from falling then, the last thing you wanted was for Joel to see you like this and to become his burden, but the way he’d shown you such care and compassion made your head feel a little less foggy, you wanted to promise that you could do that in return, that it wouldn’t just be him constantly looking after you.
“Oh sweet angel.” Both of his hands were cupping your cheeks now, pressing a light kiss to your nose and then your lips.
#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller drabble#joel miller fluff#joel miller smut#joel miller angst#joel miller fic#the last of us#tlou#dovedewdrop writes
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PAC: Who Wants to Match Your Freak? (18+)
Inspired by the infamous ‘Nasty’ by Tinashe, this pick a pile is on the X-rated side (my first time doing this btw). We’re getting into the nitty gritty! But before we do, just know that it is important to use protection, no matter what your gender identity is! Now… let’s find out who wants to get nasty nasty nasty 🫦🫦🫦
Without further ado, please select your Tinashe still!
Pile 1-4: (Top Left-to-Bottom Right)




Pile One: This person is definitely into roleplay. They would like to teach you some things and learn some things from you inside of the bedroom. I feel like this is someone you wouldn’t see as a “freak”. This gives me the energy of Jhene Aiko. To you, they are very innocent but you have not seen that side of them yet. They wanna show you that they can hold their own. They want to meet you halfway. What I am getting here is the energy of a secret rendezvous. This may start off as something that is lowkey but ultimately, you could end up in a couple with this person due to their skills! You’ll want them all to yourself, Pile One. Now for the good stuff, lol. This person will definitely be into nibbling and sweet whisperings. If you are a woman that is into women, this person will definitely be on top. They like to be the star of the show. They could get a little greedy. I feel like the person who wants to match your freak does not want to rush the act with you. They want to take it slow; they may be into edging. They will be into stripteases and lapdances. They don’t really like to take risks in the bedroom, unless you’d be the one doing it.
Cards Used: The High Priestess, 7 of Swords, The Star, 2 of Discs, 2 of Cups.
Pile Two: Ooo, this feels like a reminiscent energy. I feel like this is the energy of someone from the past. It could be an ex. It could be an old friend. It could be a former sexual partner. This partner is in love with you, lmao. I feel like this person could have drunk texted you recently or they have a history of doing so. They might do it again, lol. They want to spin the block really badly. They’d like to get you all alone after having a long conversation about the things that went down between you two. This person could have a really thick accent that you’re attracted to. This person is very suave, I can tell. For some of you, this person may be thinking of making you their third. This person could also be into watching you play with yourself. They are into your… fluids lol. This feels like a makeup session. This person misses you very badly and they would like to show you with their actions (and their tongue). It’s really up to you whether or not they will come back.
Cards Used: 3 of Swords, Princess of Cups, The Magician, 3 of Cups, Ace of Cups.
Pile Three: I heard the word “impressive”. I think that this person is known for their bedroom skills. This could be a former sexual partner, but it doesn’t have to be. I will say that this person’s physical appearance is very attractive to all genders. They are universally attractive. This person is someone that feels like you have unfinished business with them. Maybe you’ve shared a kiss with them, but it didn’t go anywhere past that. Maybe you two have done nothing but text and chat on the phone. You may have even fallen off with this person. However, this person wants to know where the hell you’ve been. In the bedroom, they are into BDSM. They could also like to do things while under the influence, but it’s not necessary. They like to put their weight on their lovers. They are definitely dominant in the bedroom. Don’t be afraid to step in the bedroom with them. They can also last for a long time, so you will be depleted of all your energy once y’all are finished. They don’t bite, unless you want them to.
Cards Used: 6 of Cups, The Moon, 10 of Swords, 4 of Pentacles, Wheel of Fortune.
Pile Four: I feel like this is for my people who currently attend college. I feel like this is a classmate you’ve been eyeing. They have a nice style. They could be inspired by the mid 2000s Southern fashion trends. I think that this person has a breeding kink, tbh. They think you’re someone that they can take home to their mother. They are very into courting. They try to put on an image of appearing “good” or “neutral” to the public. Their reputation is very important to them. I feel like this person is well off. You are very tempting to this person. Honestly, this person might have a worship/praise kink as well. They may be slow to initiate the act. For some of you, this is a pillow princess. The vibe is similar to Pile One but the difference with this pile is that it’s all an act. This person could appear to be “boujee” or “aloof” but don’t knock it until you try it. There isn’t anything wrong with keeping it undercover.
Cards Used: 10 of Cups, 6 of Discs, 4 of Swords, 9 of Discs, 10 of Discs, Knight of Discs.
#tarot#law of assumption#tarotreading#manifesting#pick a card#hoodoo#neville goddard#divination#pick a pile#astro notes#pick a reading#tarot pick a card#tarot reading#black tarot readers#tarot cards#oracle cards#18+ readings#spirituality#tarot deck#pac reading#free tarot#tarotcommunity#tarot pac
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Watching Are You Sure?! EP 8 Finale
A reminder of how I do these reaction posts as I watch things. I just write my reactions and thoughts down literally they happen. Think more of a bullet point format. I'll include links when I can to videos, thanks to the people who twt who upload clips and to @dstdes for providing so many of my linked video clips. And at the end, I'll do a better wrap up of all my opinions. I hope everyone enjoyed the show, I can't believe it's over!!

JK turning on Korea's top hits on the radio and both their songs playing one after the other. They KNOW they are powerful. I like them seeing/hearing that evidence though first hand 🥰 Jikook can't be separated, even on the radio!*
JK mentioning the Park Jimin summoning spell 😭😂 lmfao I love it
"this is the boyfriend shot" Jimin says THREE TIMES IN A ROW. we get it, he said this is what it looks like to go out on a date with Jungkook. And Jimin is the one who gets to do that 😅😂🥰🥰🥰 goodness. What was that Jimin? Lol honestly though, it was a cute and cozy picture!

Did the head chef just gift them one of everything on the menu?! Lmao they have so much food!!
JK telling Jimin to basically just strip naked because he went to go undo his pants buckle because he was so full but it was already undone was such a wild statement and comment to make?? The fuck? Lmao and Jimin replying with a meme was hysterical. Joking yet blushing. Top notch 😂😂 loved it. Love them. We aren't even 20 minutes into the episode yet And that was so out of pocket 😂🤣
JK being so tickled over teasing Jimin and making him come back to the car to get him 🤣 they are so funny!
Jimin dancing SNTY 😍
Their giggles over the beds?? Lol it has to be because they saw photos originally and saw the staff had separated out the beds to be separate when they originally weren't and then still gave them matching PJs to wear 🤣🤣 idk why they would do that? Lol they aren't strangers to sharing a bed lol
Jungkook teasing Jimin over the scuzzi 😂😂
Jimin putting snowballs on his head while in the hottub lol the way JK watched him. Love 😍
Not rock paper scissors to have to lay down in the snow 🤣 Jimin forcing JK to follow through on the punishment he thought up 🤣🤣🤣 the way Jimin called him baby as JK gave him the biggest puppy eyes trying to get out of having to do it 🥺🥺🥺
Jimin just laying on the floor at the bottom of the stairs while JK has his snack. Lmfao the call and response singing they had is so cute and what a song choice! 😂 Jimin saying he likes randomly laying/sprawling/rolling on the floor at home too 😂

Them reacting to episode 1 of AYS was NOT on my bingo called but im so happy about it! The editors joking with them and their interaction with the staff made me so happy too! It was also really funny them admitting to having a hard time editing the show 😂

Their giggles heal something in my soul 🥰
And the way they are sitting so close and kept their feet touching almost the entire time?? 🥰🥰🥰
Jimin's head in JKs lap at some point while watching too. I love them

JK acting a fool in the kitchen while cooking to make Jimin laugh 🥰🥰🥰
Jimin calling JK " Honey" 🥺🥺🥺 he wanted to cheers their glasses, but he called him honey. Cute
Not them teasing each other over their snores and sleeping habits 😂
"Jimin doesn't like it when someone touches his head" JK says, while rubbing his head with Jimin unbothered. Lol Jimin will let that man do ANYTHING to him 😂 and idk if JK was trying to tease Jimin or us by flexing his privilege in our face. Probably both 😂
JK saying driving on smaller roads like this is romantic. Jimin saying "this is romance, this is youth, this is nice" 😭😭😭 fuck they are so cute
JK is flying from Japan to Korea and then basically straight back out to America for his schedule. And he choose to not drink, even though he really wanted to, because he wanted to drive Jimin to the airport, just them instead of depending on the staff to take them. Give them that extra alone time together. And he chose to fly to Korea with Jimin instead of giving himself an easier and more relaxing travel schedule with more rest by staying and flying to America from Japan instead. That is... It's really fucking special and sweet and says so much about how they love each other honestly.

Giving up his last beer of their trip, after being told to relax and not worry about it because he wanted to be the one to drive them, to have that time together, just them and a GoPro they had control over, and spending that extra travel time to be together when it made a much longer and harder few days for him? That's that persistent, dedicated, quiet yet impactful kinda love. Really said a lot without saying anything.
The tradition continues of JK filming their food before ending with a close up shot of Jimins face. love that is a constant here 🥰

"I'll make sure you have a safe journey" "it's an honor" just kill me now omfg 😭🥰😭
JK being salty that Jin didn't dream about him with Jimin in the military since they are going together 😂😂😂😂
Jikook talking about how these trips were some of the happiest moments ever. And the way they were feeling a little melancholy over the trip ending and things changing and losing this constant togetherness time they had to be free .. goodness. Enjoying the cool air while trying to feel better. Ugh, I love them. I love them so much and I love the way they love each other so much.

Talking about how they loved it so much in the ending interviews, how they were the best of times. JK softly rubbing Jimins nape and back in comfort too. I'm tearing up, damn

The way JK is looking at Jimin during that last interview outtakes. My goodness 😍 same way Jimin was looking at JK while he was driving 😍
Them ending the show by having us literally send them off to the military is cruel, omfg. I AM CRYING NOW, DAMN. "A letter from beyond" fuck you too editors 😭
Wrap up Thoughts:
I'm so sad this is over. My God. Minute of silence to mourn.
.
.
.
This was such a sweet and wholesome episode. It had teasing, it had bickering, it had pet names. It was domestic as heck. It was the perfect trip for them to end their "freedom" before military service. I would have loved more conversations about that, but I'm fairly content as it is too.
Again, so many cuts (not complaining, very normal) but my favorite was how Jimin went to go wake JK up and then it cut to them leaving. I hope they enjoyed their time cuddling and relaxing sans cameras and interruption 🥰 (my assumptions I guess, but wouldn't be far fetched)
Letting my delulu out when Jimin said he just lays wherever whenever all the time at home and me thinking about the the members teasing JK about all the random ass mattresses over his house 🤣 it's too keep them comfy no matter where they end up wanting to lay 🤣🤣 (just kidding, sort of lol)
The way Jikook play fight is so equal and cute and funny. They just shove the crap out of each other but never with an intention to hurt or be mean. And they both LOVE IT.
They trust each other, give weight to each other's words and have confidence in the others beliefs and thoughts like no one else. It's such a special bond, and I'm so so glad they opted to share this with us. I truly am so grateful. And grateful for y'all letting me share all my musings with you too. 💜
And we have to end this post with the way that Jikook were spotted in Sapporo driving in the car, Jimin being the passenger princess he was, alone with their GoPro's and giving major flirty energy. And the way the show just proved OP right too. Genuinely Jikook are so special and wonderful and amazing and I love them so much. And when they got home from this trip, the group live they did shortly after? They were sooooo touchy and snuggly!
Hope everyone is excited for the photobook and behinds as well. I unfortunately am horribly sad because I'm broke AF and cannot afford to buy it in my budget at the moment, but hopefully ARMYs will upload all the photos and upload the behinds for everyone too. I will share links if I find them.
#jikook#kookmin#jikook are you sure#jikook travel show#jikook in sapporo#jikook in 2023#jikook in japan
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New ask game! Please recommend at least three of your favorite BuckTommy fic authors, artists, meta writers, gif makers, or edit makers. Maybe sing their praises a bit if you'd like. And if you want to, send this to a few other people and spread the good vibes 🥰
@thatmexisaurusrex thanks for the ask!
BuckTommy Fan Work Recs
Fic Authors:
(obviously this isn't a comprehensive list, but a collection of fics I've read recently and really enjoyed)
all the vices i can't give up by @starryeyedjanai - this one is so fun and hot, I love sexting/identity porn fics so obviously I clicked right away. I also really enjoy this author's Buck pov; just funny, horny, zero impulse control Evan Buckly and his dick pics against the world.
one way trip to the sun by @newtkelly - this fic felt like a special treat crafted specifically for me. Zombies are my all time favourite movie monster and I'm a big George Romero junkie so finding a bucktommy/dawn of the dead mashup was like striking gold. I also just really loved this version of Tommy and also the narrative structure of the fic. Some really cool stuff done here.
You’ve Got Me Up in a Frenzy by @emphasisonthehomo - Trans!Tommy. Trans!Tommy with bottom surgery, how I love you so. This is so sweet and hot and nuanced and also fun. 10/10.
bright as the morning, soft as the rain. series by @milominderbindered - these were some of the first buck/tommy fics I read and I really loved this version of an alternate first meeting. Buck and Tommy's dynamic here is so cute and fun and flirty, I enjoyed reading Buck's slower realization here that, yes, this man in flirting with him, and oh boy is he into it. Also, there's just something about this version of tommy that really gets me, it's like I can see through the screen how much of an absolute catch he is.
1-800-DAYBREAK by @epiphainie - (ngl I love all your fics) but this one especially. I just really enjoyed seeing a younger Tommy and Buck here where their dynamic is flipped--Tommy being the one unsure of himself and Buck reassuring him that what he wants is okay-- it was also very hot and sweet. I'm a big sucker for phone sex operator fics, so this just reeled me right in instantly.
Goon by @alchemistc - I did not foresee my venture outside of hrpf to end up with me reading hrpf... This has everything I love about the genre and it's best tropes: hotel escapades, and locker room intimacy, and the hero worship to sexuality realization pipeline (...and Sidney Crosby haunting the narrative). Looking forward to seeing how it ends!
Paint Me in Neon and Make Me Glow by @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels - Fun, sexy, caring, D/s kink-discovery. I love how out of his mind horny Buck is for Tommy in this, and for being watched, and specifically getting watched WITH Tommy. I loved every section of this fic and how the author kept upping the stakes as they built towards the climax (ha) of the fic, which I wont spoil but you should definitely got find out for yourself.
take guesses on exits, one has to be right series by @queermccoy - The trucker!Tommy / lot lizard!Buck AU I didn't know I needed but am now eagerly awaiting the next instalment of. This was surprisingly cute and as well as scorchingly hot.
bottom tommy pleasures series by winterbucky (WinterLadyy) (if anyone knows their tumblr @ i'll tag them) - Just what it says on the tin! Bottom!Tommy I love you 😌
Artists:
@kinardsboy - Their art is always so fun and cute! I love all the buck/tommy memes they make.
@blue-arts-stuff - Their art is both sweet and also manages to hit me in the feels every time.
@lazybakerart - All of their art is beautiful, but I especially love what they've done for the @kinley-cafe!
(And of course Kinley Cafe itself for doing an amazing job spreading positivity and engagement within the fandom.)
Gif Makers/Editors:
@lengthofropes - their gifs are all so gorgeous, I don't understand how they manage half the stuff they do, but I love staring at it an inch away from my face like brightly coloured visual candy.
@sunglassesmish - my Tommy Kinard / LFJ gif dealer and has provided me with enough images of the man to construct a 3D model in my mind to rotate while painting.
@xofemeraldstars - I always look forward to their daily kinley posts! My obsession is being enabled and i'm okay with that.
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A TOAST TO THE FUTURE — TWO
Summary: Aurora and Harry used to be friends, but life happened and they grew apart. Now, 6 years later, they meet again.
Rating: +18
WARNINGS: The story contains explicit language and mentions a past abusive relationship (mostly the consequences of psychological/emotional abuse). Some chapters also contain explicit sexual content.
PART TWO: 14,9k words Please read: Part two explores a lot of Aurora's irrational thoughts and it shows how much she struggles to be herself after being married to someone who was emotionally abusive to her. From my perspective, it's a really important chapter to develop the relationship between Aurora and Harry, but I want people to be mindful of its content in case they don't feel comfortable reading about this, or in case it hits too close to them. Feel free to reach out if you want to skip something and you'd like me to fill you in. <3
PART ONE
Despite the line, getting through security would've taken Aurora hardly three minutes. That is, of course, if she hadn't had to wait for Harry for another ten.
He doesn't look the least apologetic for the held back, though. Nor bothered in the slightest by the extra time he seemingly needed. Smiling at her and holding their shared tray as he tilts his chin to an empty table and leads the way towards it.
Aurora follows him quietly, checking her watch just to make sure they won't run out of time. And she does it unconsciously, regretting every time she catches herself looking at her wrist. Because she knows they're early. She swears she knows. And she wishes she could relax and just enjoy things without that awful feeling rushing through her body. That feeling that turns into a voice and yells at her that she's constantly behind.
Behind what, one could ask, and Aurora wouldn't be able to answer.
She's just… Behind.
Behind, and watching her life go by.
All the damn time.
Harry stops by the table, and Aurora mimics him. She drops her bag and falls on one knee, pulling up the hem of her dress and uncovering her foot. The Nike sneakers she's wearing used to be white once, but now they are just old and dirty, and she loves them even more like this. She nibbles the flesh inside of her bottom lip while tying the shoelaces up, then changes to her other knee, and repeats the process.
Once she's done, she stands up and pats her legs, getting rid of any airport floor dirt from her clothes.
"You're fast," Harry says, putting his foot down from the edge of the table.
Aurora pulls the fabric of her dress up her chest and furrows her brows. "I am?"
"Hm, yeah." He frowns with amusement and chuckles. "You sure are."
"Huh." She wiggles her eyebrows up and down, then quirks the corner of her mouth up.
Maybe, she should point out that perhaps she isn't fast, but he is too slow. Or that, unlike him, she'd organized everything beforehand so she wouldn't waste any second longer than she absolutely needed to. But what good would that do? Besides, those thoughts don't even feel like hers. They don't sound like hers.
So she says nothing, instead, and steps closer to where he stands.
Harry gives the tray they're sharing a gentle push to her side, and puts his other foot up.
Aurora promptly slides the tray closer to her and places it in front of her belly, next to her bag.
Great.
Saying nothing was a bad idea, because silence is awkward now.
She licks her lips and keeps her attention on their belongings, not knowing exactly what to say.
Time goes by, though, and the longer she waits, the more awkward it gets.
So she decides to just say whatever, just to get them talking again.
"Perks of being a mom, I guess." She blurts out, then grabs their passports and shrugs. "Being fast, I mean."
Harry leans on his bent knee and looks at her over his shoulder, blindly tying up his own shoes.
"Yeah? Why's that? You get any super speed powers when you're pregnant or something?"
Aurora freezes for a second, passports still in hand. She turns her head to the side, and narrows her eyes at him.
Harry's soft lips are pursed, his green eyes are twinkling with playfulness, and his cheeks are tinted with a boyish flush under his facial hair. He's clearly having fun with his own silly comment, and it causes Aurora to break into a short laugh — not because it's funny, but because she simply can't help it.
She shakes her head, and looks back at the tray.
"I rush to get ready so I can pay attention to Noah, okay?" she explains, grabbing the boarding passes and checking the names on them. She puts hers inside of her passport, and the other inside of Harry's. "It's not a big deal."
She'd never thought about it, but it's the truth — she is usually busy keeping an eye on Noah, even from a distance. The little monster can't stay still for too long, and no matter how much she adores how energetic he is or that she tries her best to let him explore things by himself, the truth is that he's still only four, and she can't leave him wandering around unattended.
Which is why she fought so hard to sign him up for preschool — it gave her time to slow down and do other things, too.
Okay. See? That — that right there — is Aurora's truth. That's a thought that feels and sounds like hers. A thought that she came up with on her own, based on her own experiences and her own mistakes. A thought that reveals how she's learned that taking care of Noah is her responsibility, and that if she doesn't pay attention to her son, nobody does.
No matter how much she dreamed it would be different.
No matter how much she believed it should be different.
"Ohhh," Harry says. "Ok, then."
She sticks her passport and boarding pass into the front pocket of her bag, maybe a little bit more forcefully than she needs to.
"Exactly. So don't judge me."
"What?!" Harry laughs, putting his foot down from the table. "I wasn't—"
"I can't leave my son unattended, can I?"
"I—I know, yeah." His face falls, and he nods. "I get it. That's… It makes sense. Yes."
"Right. Great."
A second goes by, and then another one, and another one.
Silence settles again, but this time Aurora isn't worried about it being awkward or not.
There's just… So much going on.
Her heart is thumping loudly inside her chest, and her ears are buzzing.
She shouldn't have snapped at him.
She shouldn't have snapped at him.
It wasn't about him.
It wasn't his fault.
She pinches the tip of her nose and breathes in. Slowly, and steadily.
One more time.
Slowly.
And steadily.
And then, she moves again.
She holds Harry's things in her hand and leans on the table, reaching for his bag. Before she touches it, she looks at him over her shoulder and asks, "Do you mind if I open your bag?"
Harry doesn't answer, though. He's tilting his chin down and shaking his leg, making sure his pants are properly covering his ankles.
Aurora purses her lips and straightens her back, then slides his bag across the table and pulls it closer to her body.
Now everything's in front of her, the tray caged in between both duffel bags.
She bites her bottom lip, but it's hard to stop her mouth from turning into a smile.
Maybe the speed in which she moves isn't an inconvenience, after all. In fact, maybe it even comes in handy, because apparently if she doesn't move for both of them, someone will sooner or later shove them away.
"Harry," she insists.
"Hm?" He looks up. A frown crinkles his face — his eyebrows are pulled together, his forehead is puckered, and his lips are curled downwards. As soon as he meets her eyes, though, his shoulders drop, and he shakes his head. "Sorry."
He scratches his jaw, dragging his nails over his stubble.
Aurora stretches her arm, and pats her hand on the edge of the table, where his feet were a minute ago. "It's fine. I was just asking if it's okay to put your passport inside your bag."
"Oh! Yeah yeah, sure. Go ahead. Thanks."
"'Kay," she says, already unzipping the front pocket and putting things away.
Aurora rolls her shoulders at the same time Harry moves closer, and she unthinkingly snatches his belt from the tray and hands it to him.
"Here."
"Oh," he murmurs, grabbing it from her fingers. "Thanks."
He steps away, but there's something in his voice that somehow catches her attention, and Aurora turns her head.
She glances over her shoulder, and peeks at his face.
Harry is looking down again, chin pressed against his chest while he takes the end of his belt and puts it into the first front loop of his beige pants. His movements are casual, but he's holding back a smile, and Aurora can tell his mind is working on something.
Something silly, to be more specific.
She curls her mouth up, then raises her left eyebrow. "What?"
Harry tugs his belt, threading it through the second loop.
"What?" he repeats, and his mouth finally turns into a grin.
She turns her body towards him, then places one hand on her waist and the other spread open on the table, holding up her weight. "C'mon, out with it."
Harry laughs, slightly bending his knees and throwing his head back. "I didn't even say a word!"
"Well, you didn't have to!" She rolls her eyes and chuckles, backing away from the table to put both hands on her hips. "I can see you're thinking something."
He shakes his head, looking down and threading his belt through the next loop.
"Harry…"
He peeks at her through the corner of his eyes, then focuses back on his belt.
"You're aware you can leave me unattended, right?" he asks, keeping a bright smile on his face and the light tone on his voice.
"What?"
"I mean I don't mind." He shrugs, eyes still on his current task. "Gotta admit it's kinda cute to see you like this."
"I don't—"
"My favorite part was probably when you cleaned up the table."
"I—" Aurora closes her mouth, and exhales through her nose. "You put your feet there, Harry."
"I did, yeah. And you cleaned it up."
"Well, someone has to clean up your mess, don't you think?"
Harry glances at her, and smirks as mischievous and suggestive as he can be. "Oh, I always clean up my mess, love, don't worry about it."
He winks, and Aurora gasps.
"Oh my God!"
She turns to face the table, feelings her cheeks getting warm.
Harry laughs, though, so she steps closer to his side and nudges him with her elbow.
"Shut up."
"'Kay mum."
"Ughhh." She rolls her eyes, then shuts them tightly and takes a deep breath in. "You're so annoying."
Harry's laughter only grows louder, and Aurora shakes her head, blinking her eyes open again.
It only takes him a moment to calm down, but the smile is still obvious in his voice when he speaks again.
"I know. I'm just teasing you, tho. I'll stop now. I promise."
Aurora snorts. "Yeah, right."
She believes his words as much as she believes Noah when he promises he will eat his entire dinner if he gets to eat dessert first.
The thought brings a smile to her face, and she bites her lip to hold it back.
Peeking inside the tray one more time, she finds several rings, a bracelet, a watch, and three necklaces. Her mouth twitches, and her chest trembles with amusement — no wonder why Harry took so much longer than her to get through security.
She pulls the string of her necklace from the tray, takes each side to the back of her neck and quickly clasps it back to its everyday place. Next, she grabs her watch, and puts it on just as fast around her wrist.
"Well," she starts, then looks at him.
Harry is, once again, deeply focused on his task — his chin touches his chest, his eyebrows are pulled together, and he's biting his bottom lip.
"All yours now," she adds.
Harry peeps at her through the corner of his eyes, his hands still attached to his belt as he finally reaches the last loop. He darts his vision to the tray, then back at her, scanning her chest, her wrist, and her hands. "You sure? All of it?"
"Mhmm."
A group of people walks to their table, and Aurora takes a step aside to give them more room.
"Ok." He buckles his belt, then fixes his shirt. "We can go, then."
"Oh. I didn't mean to rush you."
He smiles, putting one hand inside the tray and carelessly collecting everything that's left inside.
"You didn't." He closes his hand into a fist, then shoves everything inside of his pocket. "It's just getting crowded here. C'mon."
"Hey, was my joke inappropriate?"
Past security and turning right, the hallway is significantly less hectic than any other area Aurora has walked through in the last hour or so.
It is probably one of the brightest, too.
"Hm?" she asks, tilting her head to give Harry her full attention. "Sorry, what joke?"
"About… Y'know, cleaning up my mess."
"Ohhh." Aurora laughs, then waves him off. "Please, it's nothing any of you guys haven't joked about before."
"I know, but… Things are different now, aren't they? Don't want to make you uncomfortable, or, well, don't want to be disrespectful to your hus—"
"You're fine," she says, cutting him off before she'll be forced to either correct him or say nothing, implicitly letting him believe there's still a husband in her life. "Don't worry about it. Let's stop here so you can put your rings back on, yeah?"
She points to one side of the hallway, and walks in front of him to guide the way. It only takes her a few steps, then she places her bag by her feet and turns around.
When she looks at him, she finds him frowning.
Frowning and frozen on the spot.
"Harry, hey!" She raises one hand and wiggles her fingers. "C'mon. I'll help you."
Harry's face softens. He shakes his head, then walks towards her while putting his hand inside of his pocket.
Leaning against the white wall, Aurora watches him come to a stop right in front of her, then drop all of his jewelry on top of her spread open palm.
"Thank you," he murmurs.
She finds his sight again, and a smile blooms across her face. "Sure, no problem."
His lips curve into a smile, too, and he looks down. He shakes his head and pulls his hair back, then turns his attention back to the items on Aurora's palms. He seems meticulous about which ring goes where, fiddling with them and hunting for specific ones. Eventually, he grabs three at once, and puts them on his pinky, middle and index left fingers.
Aurora raises her chin and rests the back of her head against the wall, comfortably watching his relaxed face as he towers over her.
From what she remembers, jewelry was never Harry's thing. Long hair and skinny jeans? One hundred percent. But the necklaces, the rings, and the bracelets? Those were things she'd no idea he'd be into. Or maybe not to the point of making them part of his casual look to the airport.
"So," she teases, easing her dry lips with her tongue then forcing her voice to sound exactly like she imagines a reporter would sound like, "Harry, would you say you enjoy wearing rings?"
Harry darts his eyes to her, and the expression on his face never falters, holding a serious and unamused demeanor as he moves his lips to say, "Bloody hate them."
She presses her lips together, but then she snorts, taking her free hand to cover her mouth.
Harry shakes his head and grins, changing hands and catching two more rings to put on his right fingers.
"Why? What's wrong with my rings?"
She sighs and shrugs, calming down from her brief moment of foolish, silly laughter.
"Nothing. 'M just teasing you."
He places the last two, and pulls the two golden strings from her palm.
"Hmm…" Harry nods. He fixes his eyes on the jewelry and frowns, eying the many tiny knots that had formed along the necklaces. "Great, then. Glad you're having fun at my expense."
Aurora drops her jaw.
"You were making fun of me two minutes ago!"
Harry chuckles, although he's distracted by his attempt to untangle his necklaces. "Guess I was, huh."
He shakes his head, and Aurora steps away from the wall, getting closer to him.
"Which wrist do you wear this one?" she asks, lifting her hand and his bracelet.
"Left—I mean, right," he answers, and although they don't look at each other's faces, they both smile at the same time.
Harry remains focused on the knotted strings between his fingers, but stops moving when Aurora curls one hand around his right wrist and pulls it closer to her face. In one quick movement, she clasps the item around it, then taps his hand twice.
"All done. Now gimme that."
She snatches the necklaces from him, and observes carefully before undoing the mess. One of the golden strings is longer than hers, but they're both just as delicate, and instead of a disk, one holds a cross pendant, and the other a tiny, thin tag. She bites her lip and patiently fiddles with the pieces of jewelry, taking her time to unwrap the tiny knots.
Things are quiet. Time ticks without a hurry. And after a minute, or maybe two, or three, she grins proudly, and lifts her chin to look at him.
"Look!" she says, even though she doesn't have to — Harry's already looking at her, already watching her. "I've done it!"
He blinks a couple of times, then nods, slowly mimicking her smile and her excitement. "Y—You did, yeah! Thanks."
"You're welcome." She grabs the longest string, picking each side with one hand, and takes a step closer to him. "I find untangling necklaces weirdly therapeutic."
Harry widens his eyes. "What are you doing?!"
Aurora rolls her eyes, and chuckles. "Calm down. I'm not gonna kiss you, don't worry."
"Right. No, yeah, I know that." He chuckles, too. "Of course."
She stops moving and tilts her head, then raises her hands. "I mean, can I?"
"Wha—" Harry takes a step back. "Kiss me?!"
"Harry!" Aurora shrieks, also taking a step back and away from him. "Oh my God, no!"
She looks at him for a moment, taking in his bulged eyes and raised eyebrows. He looks mortified, and there's so much going on at once that she can't help but burst into laughter — at the misunderstanding, at the look of his face, but also at the terror in his voice.
She turns away from him, throwing her head back as laughter breaches from her chest.
"This is… I can't…"
"Sorry," Harry says, "I just—"
Aurora shakes her head, feeling warmth radiating from her chest throughout her entire body.
"Oh my… Oh my God." She places one hand on her stomach and brings the other to her face, fanning herself while taking a deep breath in through her nose. "You should've… You should've seen your face… Oh God… Harry… You panicked so hard, I just…"
She wipes a tear from under her eye, and takes another deep breath in, working to calm herself down.
"I never… I never thought the idea of kissing me could… Could be that terrifying for someone. Oh God."
Harry sighs. "Auri…"
She turns around, and looks at him with the biggest smile on her face, her body still shaking from laughing.
Harry isn't happy, though. Or at least he doesn't seem to be. He's narrowing his eyes, and furrowing his brows. His lips are pressed into a hard line, and his forehead is puckered.
And just like that, Aurora's laughter fades away.
Shit.
She's too familiar with that dynamic, so she clears her throat and shakes her head.
"I'm sorry. I—I know it wasn't funny. I just… I think I haven't laughed this hard in a really long time, so I just… I got carried away, I guess. I'm sorry. But I shouldn't—Sorry."
"Listen, I didn't—"
"Yeah, yeah. I know."
Actually, Aurora doesn't know. Of course she doesn't know. She has absolutely no idea what he was about to say, but she doesn't want to talk about it. She's been there before. And she's been there before so many times that her mind and body don't even know how to react any other way. How not to anticipate the humiliation and shame that is about to follow. How not to completely shut off.
Thankfully, Harry seems to get it, because he nods, grabbing his necklaces from her hand and putting them back inside of his pocket.
And this time, Aurora doesn't say anything about it, grabbing her bag from the floor and feeling ready to move on.
"Do you mind if we take a look around some of the shops?" Aurora asks, pointing around the World Duty Free and breaking the silence that settled between them for the past few minutes.
Harry moves slowly next to her, keeping his hands inside of his pockets. "'Course not."
"Thanks." She makes sure to curve her mouth into a smile, then stops at the first shop to take a look at the makeup.
Things are quiet, but Harry stands right behind her all the time, keeping her company while she brings a lipstick closer to her face to check the color shade, and then following her steps when she moves to a different shelf.
"Hey," Aurora says, looking over her shoulder, "what's your cologne?"
"Hm..." He scratches his jaw and shrugs. "Depends on the day, I guess."
She nods, then turns to face some nail polish, aiming for the brightest options.
It's been a while since she's done her nails. She used to love looking at her hands and seeing them colorful and filled with rings, it used to make her feel beautiful and delicate. Feminine.
Zack used to love it as well, though, and to be honest at some point she stopped doing a lot of things Zack liked. Just because.
"Which one are you wearing today, then?"
"Why?"
She shrugs. His voice is right behind her, but Aurora doesn't turn around to look at him.
"'Cause you smell really nice."
Maybe she could do her nails in Italy… Maybe one of the girls brought something with them.
Or maybe she could get something herself…
The orange shades look nice…
She sighs, and steps away from the shelf.
She can't. She shouldn't spend her money like that. She needs to be more careful now, especially since she spent a lot of unplanned money on that trip to Italy.
She turns her head, wiggling her eyebrows at him. "So…?"
Harry clears his throat. "Uh… Well… It's Guerlain."
Aurora twirls, holding her bag close to her body as her hair and dress follow her brisk movement.
"Cool! Let's find it, then."
She walks away, and Harry's low chuckle echoes behind her.
Although she can't see him, she feels his presence all the time, following her pace.
"What for?" he asks.
"I don't know." She shrugs, looking from one side to the other. Scanning all the tiny duty-free shops. "I'm bored, I'm tired… Oh! There it is!"
Her pace quickens, and so does Harry's.
Aurora only stops when she's in front of the Guerlain shelves, and then she turns around, staring at him with a smile on her face and pointing her arm to the many colognes displayed behind her.
"Which one is yours?"
He clears his throat, and—
Wait, is he blushing?
Aurora purses her lips, holding herself back from laughing.
"It's L'Homme Idéal Extrême."
"Hmmm." She wiggles her eyebrows, and pulls one corner of her mouth up in a smirk. "Sounds sexy…"
"Jesus Christ," Harry grunts, hiding his face behind both of his hands and shaking his head.
Aurora laughs at his reaction, tapping his shoulder twice before turning on her feet and looking for his cologne.
"What happened to you in the States, huh?" She leans down, squinting to read the names. "Never thought I would see Harry Styles getting all shy in front of me."
It takes him a moment to answer, but eventually he mumbles, "I've always been shy in front of you."
Aurora pauses for a moment, replaying his words in her mind. Images of them hanging out together pop up immediately — at the pub, at someone's apartment, after class, over the weekend. His cheeky glances, touchy hands and bold comments are always present, one way or another. He always craved attention, and people had no problem granting his wishes.
It never bothered her, because he was young and had just joined university, but it certainly didn't paint him as a shy and reserved person.
A snort leaves her mouth. "Yeah, right."
She stands, and puts her hands on her waist. "What was the sexy name again?"
"L'Homme—" He sighs. "It's this one."
Aurora turns around, only to find Harry standing in the same place they were a minute ago. The shelf next to him is filled with bottles of the same cologne. Apparently, his cologne.
She gasps.
"Harry!" She walks towards him, and Harry shakes his head in soft laughter, scratching the back of his neck. "I was standing right next to it and you didn't tell me!"
"It's just a very common cologne, Auri." He laughs, again. It sounds kind of shaky, though, and she frowns, stopping on her track. "I don't… Why are we looking for it?"
Uh…
Well… To be honest… She doesn't have an answer for that.
She doesn't know why they're looking for it. She is just joking. She just wanted to pass the time because she is exhausted, and because the longer she spends around people, the more afraid she is of falling apart at any moment. She thought maybe she could try it on, see if his cologne would smell as well on her skin as it smelled on his… Who knows… She was just… She wasn't thinking, okay? She was just being her stupid self.
Harry, on the other hand, isn't just messing around. Harry looks actually nervous.
Her jokes are making him nervous.
She is making him uncomfortable.
In the middle of an airport, filled with people.
Shit.
And she's done it twice now.
First with the necklace… Now with the cologne…
Fuck.
How many more times till he reaches his breaking point?
How many more times till she finally pushes him through the edge?
How many more times till she puts him in a position where he won't be able to stop himself from snapping at her?
Her hands shake, and her stomach quivers.
"Yeah, no, I mean…" She shakes her head and smiles at him, closing her hands into fists and placing them behind her back. "You're right. Sorry. I—I'm really sorry. Hm… I think I… I should get a coffee."
Harry flinches his head back. "Wait what?"
"Coffee. It'll keep me awake." She walks around him, and Harry follows her movements.
"Auri, but what… Hey! What about my cologne?"
She waves it off. "Yeah, I know. I was just being annoying."
She moves towards the exit of the duty-free, where all the departure gates are, and another yawn breaks through her lips.
"Yep." She chuckles. "Definitely need some coffee."
"Auri," Harry calls, catching up with her. "Hey, stop. C'mon. Something just happened."
"What do you mean?" Aurora laughs.
She flexes her fingers, curling and uncurling them. Her eyes wander around the airport, looking for a coffee shop.
A coffee shop.
A coffee shop.
She needs a coffee shop. She needs to get herself together. She needs to busy herself with something before she does something silly and stupid again.
"I… I don't know. Why did you change your mind?"
Harry walks next to her, and she offers him a smile.
"About what?"
"What do you mean about what? About my cologne, Auri!"
Aurora flinches.
"Sorry. Yeah, no, right. The cologne. Yeah. I just… I made you uncomfortable and I was being childish. Sorry."
"I wasn't uncomfortable, Auri, I just—"
"I know."
"Auri, no, listen—"
"Harry." She turns around and smiles, then places one hand on his elbow. "It's fine. You don't need to explain yourself. I just… I really, really need a coffee right now. I haven't slept all night, so… Yeah. I'd just like to get a coffee. If you don't mind."
She lets go of his elbow, and Harry sighs.
"Ok, yeah. Let's get you some coffee, then."
They walk forward, side to side, and Harry speaks again.
"Do you still drink caramel coffee?"
Aurora widens her eyes.
"Wow… That's back from… Well, a long time ago."
It's small, and kind of timid, but Harry smiles, and then shrugs. "Used to get you one at least once a week, didn't I?"
"You did, yeah." She smiles back at him and nods, then faces forward again. There's a coffee shop only three stores ahead, and it seems to be already open. Thank God. "To be honest I can't remember the last time I had one. I drink plain black coffee now."
Harry nods, and they both walk in silence, side by side — always side by side.
It shouldn't be uncomfortable, but Aurora's chest is heavy, and her mind seems foggy.
Truth be told, she thought she would have more time before she started disappointing her friends, before letting them know how much she's changed and how uninteresting she's become.
Meeting Harry at the airport got in between her plans, though. And she could feel herself breaking little by little each second. Having to face the memories of someone she used to be, someone she liked to be, but also someone she isn't anymore. And someone she can't be anymore.
Looking at her feet, she bites the inside of her lip. She was acting like a child at the duty-free, wasn't she? Jumping around, excited about his cologne…
God. She hasn't even left the country yet, and she's already ruining things.
She needs to control herself.
She isn't a teenager anymore. She can't embarrass him. She doesn't want to embarrass him.
"Do you want something to eat?" Harry asks, and she stops walking.
They're in front of the coffee shop, but Aurora wouldn't have realized if it weren't for him.
She shakes her head. "No, I'll just get myself a coffee."
"Let me get it for you."
What?
She takes a step back. "Absolutely not."
Harry's smile falters, but he doesn't give up. "C'mon… Like the old times! Yeah?"
"No, Harry. I mean, thanks, but no. I can pay for mine."
"I know you can pay for yours, I don't—"
"Please." She shakes her head and looks down to the floor. "It's just a silly coffee. I can get it for me. Okay?"
Harry frowns.
"Ok? Yeah."
Aurora nods, looks at the shop, then back to the floor. "Are you getting anything?"
"No, I'll just wait here."
"Okay," she whispers, forcing a smile before turning around and walking away.
It's crazy to see how much Harry has changed.
That's all Aurora can think about while she stands in line and watches him type on his phone.
He's still outside, waiting for her, and seems deeply engaged with his conversation, frowning while his fingers move rapidly.
No more black skinny jeans, no more vintage t-shirts or Chelsea boots. No more curls that are longer than her own hair. No more thin shoulders nor skinny arms.
His baggy pants — wide legged, high-waisted — are beige, his cute shoes are yellow, and she still can't get over the flamingo shirt he's wearing.
He looks older, too. Brooding features, chiseled cheekbones, growing stubble. His face is perfectly carved, his traces have hardened, and there is something very manly about the way he stands there, focusing on typing on his phone.
It isn't just his physical appearance, though. He acts like a grown-up, too. There's something about the way he simply exists that screams how much he's changed. You would never tell the man standing outside is the same boy who used to make stupid bets with his roommates from uni. But it's clear that Harry isn't a boy anymore, and that he's turned into a man.
And Aurora wasn't prepared to deal with that.
Aurora lowers her chin and rubs her eyes.
She is being ridiculous.
Why would she need to be prepared for that?
Of course Harry grew up! How old is he now, anyway? 29? 30? Of course he isn't the same anymore.
She should focus on how nice it is to see him again, not about stupid things.
Who would've thought she would actually meet him at the airport? Who would've thought they'd end up sharing the flight? Standing in line with him, hopefully getting some seats next to each other… She should appreciate having a friend by her side. That's all.
Aurora can't remember why he stopped hanging out with the group, though, and now she can't stop thinking about it. She has absolutely no idea about anything that could be going on with his life. It was as if Harry had grown more and more distant with time, until he wasn't there at all.
She's still pretty sure the last time she saw him was at her and Zack's wedding. She remembers someone telling her he'd moved to the United States, but why wasn't she at his graduation? It didn't make sense. Especially considering how, around a year later, he was kind enough to send them a basket when Noah was born.
They weren't the closest friends, and they were in very different stages of their lives when they met, sure, but they were part of the same group, and she used to have a soft spot for him. Just like she used to have a soft spot for Niall.
Usually, when they were all at the pub, everyone would leave and the three of them would stay behind, chatting and laughing until Aurora felt her lids closing by themselves and they would walk her home. They both used to make her laugh all the time, and she actually loved spending those moments with them.
Until she met Zack, of course, and then she started spending her nights with him.
Maybe that was it. Maybe it wasn't about him. Maybe she had grown more and more distant, until she wasn't around anymore. At all.
She knows it's something she's done with everyone else, at least. The girls would knock on her door from time to time, though, and she couldn't run from everyone whilst living in the same city, but Harry flying overseas was a different situation. So it makes sense they didn't keep up with their friendship.
It makes sense, but it still bothers her.
It bothers her because she forgot how easy, and fun, and electrifying it was to be around him. She forgot how affectionate, attentive, kind, and friendly he was. She forgot how spontaneous and cheerful she used to be with him. She forgot how much she enjoyed his carefree and easygoing way of looking at life. She forgot…
Well, to be honest, it's like she just forgot about him.
And how could she forget about him?
Harry used to be such a great friend.
Just like Niall.
But somehow different.
Because there's something about the way Harry looks at her that she never found in Niall's eyes. It has something to do with Harry's curiosity, probably. How much he cares about details. How he likes to know more about people, about things, about everything.
"Next?" the lady behind the counter shouts.
Aurora shakes her head, and darts her eyes away from Harry.
She has no idea how much time she just spent staring at him. She didn't even notice she was doing it, to be honest. And she can only hope he didn't notice, as well.
The woman behind her taps her shoulder.
"That's you, miss," she says.
Aurora widens her eyes and steps forward. "Oh, yes, sorry… Hi!"
Their flight is delayed.
Aurora laughs, and rubs her fingers on her forehead.
"And I was worried I'd be late," she murmurs.
They've been hanging out by their gate for at least half an hour now. Harry sits next to her, their bags placed together on his opposite side. He's leaning back comfortably, arms crossed on top of his abdomen and legs spread open in front of him.
He nudges her arm with his elbow, then asks, "What was that?"
She shakes her head and waves him off with one hand, then double taps her phone with the other, lighting up the screen.
It's 6:30.
Noah should be waking up by now. Or at least Zack should be trying to wake him up.
She unlocks her phone and opens up the app to text him. She takes a deep breath in, and her fingers hover the screen. She needs to be careful with her words, because she doesn't want him to think she doesn't trust him with Noah. That would be unfair with him. And it's not even about that. Of course it's not! She knows Noah's safe with his dad. She swears she never questioned him as a father. Whatever happened between them as a couple would never change the fact that Zack loves Noah to death.
Aurora knows that. Really! The only reason why she wants to know how they're doing is because Noah has never woken up at his dad's new place, and because she knows what a long and emotional process it can be to wake him up. That's all.
She bites her bottom lip, and types the same questions again and again, until she's happy with the way she's phrased them.
Hii!
How are you guys doing?
How was Noah's first night over there? Did you guys have fun?
She sends the messages, and reads them over. And over, and over.
That was good, wasn't it? She sounded friendly, right? She wasn't attacking him, right? He wouldn't be mad at her, right?
"I'll be right back," Harry says, getting up from his seat. He moves past her quickly, looking at his own hand and sliding his finger through the screen of his phone before taking it to his ear. "Hey… Yeah, I know… No, you listen to me…"
Harry doesn't sound happy — at all — and Aurora frowns. She watches him walk away, blending between people, then glances back to her phone.
No signs of Zack yet. Which is fine. Of course. It's not even been a minute. Actually, Aurora is usually so absorbed by Noah in the mornings that she doesn't check her phone until she drops him off at preschool. So it's fine. Really.
Hopefully he'll be able to make him have breakfast by 7:15, though. Otherwise they won't get there on time. Should she remind him of that? No, that's stupid. Zack is not stupid, and she always drives him insane for reminding him of the obvious little details.
Maybe he won't even take him to preschool. Maybe he'll drive him over to his parents, instead.
Or maybe she should just trust him. Maybe this would be the time he'd follow through with a promise he'd made.
Another yawn sneaks up on her. She slides down on her seat and rubs her eyes with the palms of her hands.
Maybe she should accept Harry's offer and take a quick nap on his shoulder. She brushed the idea off minutes ago, but now she can't deny it sounds really tempting.
God… How is she supposed to spend two days on a yacht? She's never been on one before. She also hasn't been around all her friends in a very long time…
Is she going to be able to interact with them? Because if they're expecting her to act the same way she used to before getting married… Well, they'll be extremely disappointed.
The only thing about Aurora that'll resemble those old days are the clothes Maddie packed for her.
Shit. Oh shit. Oh… Fuck! Her clothes. No, no, no. Shit! She is going to kill Madison.
She can't wear all those clothes in front of Harry! There is no fucking way she'll walk in front of him in a bikini, or wearing those silk and backless dresses. There is absolutely no fucking way she's going to wear those tops that almost don't cover her breasts in front of him.
Well, not just in front of him, of course…
She's thinking about Harry because he's the one with her right now, but she doesn't want to wear those clothes in front of anyone. Not just him.
It isn't even about the people, really. It's about her body. A body that has changed a lot through the years.
Oh, boy… She needs to sleep. She can't start spiraling about how unsexy she's been feeling for years. It's not the moment for that. It's not what the weekend is about.
"Are you sleeping with your eyes open?" Harry's low and deep voice sounds right next to her ear, and Aurora jumps on her seat.
Harry chuckles behind her, then makes his way around her seat.
"Shit," she murmurs, taking her hand to her chest, but a shaky laugh still leaves her mouth. "You scared me."
He stops in front of her and furrows his brows, then tilts his head to the side and curves his mouth into a cheeky smile, narrowing his eyes to look at her.
"What?" she asks.
He doesn't move, though.
And he also doesn't stop staring at her.
Aurora shifts on her seat.
But the staring still doesn't stop.
"Harry!" She chuckles, and looks away.
And he still doesn't even flinch.
Oh, c'mon! That's ridiculous.
It's like going back to university, honestly. He used to do the same when they were younger, usually at a pub or a club. He would stare at her like that until she stumbled over her own words, or until she forgot what she was about to do. He thought it was hilarious, but she never understood the point of it.
"Knock it off, will ya?" She crosses her arms on top of her chest and rolls her eyes. "I was just thinking."
Harry (finally) laughs, face lighting up again — with dimples and wrinkles and almost fully-closed eyes.
He moves his arm, and puts a paper cup in front of her face.
Aurora snaps her brows together.
"Sorry, love, I was just testing my skills," he says.
Aurora flinches her head back.
Why is he shoving that cup in her eyes?
And also… "What skills?"
He shrugs. "Y'know, to rile you up just by looking at you."
Harry presses his lips together, as if he can't wait to burst out laughing.
And Aurora knows that face, because Noah does the exact same thing. The cheeky little monster loves to surprise her, but he can never hold up a lie. He gives out the entire thing just by looking at her with the same excitement on his face.
They honestly look the same. Except Noah is only four, and Harry a thirty-year-old man.
"Ha ha," she mocks him, looking away from his silly face. "You and my four-year-old son would be great friends."
"Aww!" Harry takes his seat next to her, chuckling and throwing an arm around her shoulders to pull her closer to his side. "I'm sure we would."
She rolls her eyes.
Harry squeezes her cheek against his chest, and she's so close to his body that she can smell the soap and cologne emanating from his skin. He smells good. Like a fresh shower. It's a nice combination, something both strong and smooth at the same time.
Shit.
She pulls away, and shakes her head.
"It wasn't a compliment," she murmurs.
Harry chuckles.
"Yeah, I'm aware of that." He withdraws his arm from around her shoulders and takes it back to his side, then puts his hand back in front of her face. The one holding a paper cup. "Now, this is for you."
Aurora raises her eyebrows.
"And what's this supposed to be, exactly?"
"Just try it."
She doesn't make any movement to acknowledge his request, but Harry also doesn't make any movement to hint he'll stop shoving the cup on her face. Eventually, she sighs, and her entire body falls.
"Harry…"
"Oh, c'mon! Just a sip. Amuse me, yeah?"
Aurora glances at his hand, then back at his face. She presses lips together, then finally uncrosses her arms and lifts one of them to reach the cup, curling her fingers around it.
For the sake of not ruining her mood, she ignores the way he cheers, or how he grins proudly before leaning his back against the backrest of his seat. She simply clutches the cup between both hands, instead, and its warmth is a high contrast with her cold skin. She can't help but hum at the feeling, and then she shivers, even her chin trembling a little.
A timid chuckle escapes from her mouth, and she closes her eyes. She brings the cup up to her face and puts her nose close to the lid, breathing the flavor in.
And just like that, her chest tightens.
The smell is unmistakable, a combination between coffee and caramel that she would recognize anywhere, anytime.
She blinks her eyes open, and turns her head to look at him.
Harry is watching her attentively, without any traces of amusement or playfulness surrounding him anymore.
Aurora blinks a couple of times, gathering enough strength to ask him, "Did you… Did you get me a caramel coffee?"
He nods once, only one side of his mouth lifting up. "Yeah."
She looks back at the cup in her hands, and blinks again.
"Why?"
"I don't know," he says, softly. "Intuition, maybe. I know you already had your black coffee, but I… I don't know. I felt like you needed it? I don't know. Actually, now that I'm thinking about it, it sounds stupid. Is that okay? Hope I didn't—"
She nods rapidly — unable to speak, but also desperate for him to stop explaining himself.
And thankfully, he does.
Aurora doesn't know what to say about it, though. She doesn't even know if there's anything she can say about it.
His words don't sound stupid to her. That's for sure. The thing is that Harry doesn't understand the meaning his gesture actually holds, which scares her. He was able to pick up on something she needed when she wasn't brave enough to admit it to herself in the first place. And it was something so trivial… It was just coffee. Coffee.
"Noah does that sometimes, y'know," Aurora murmurs, looking at the mass of people in front of them. She hunches down a bit, not bothering by her awful posture as she comforts herself with the hot beverage in between her hands. Changing the subject is the only way she knows how to answer him right now, so she keeps going. "Sleeping with his eyes half open. It freaks me out."
Harry hums.
"There's a name for that, isn't it?"
His voice is as soft and calm as before, and Aurora nods.
"Yeah, nocturnal something… I don't know. I always forget the stupid word." She rolls her eyes, and a humorless laugh leaves her mouth, making her body shake. "How do people even choose these names, huh? Why bother naming it if it's gonna be some ridiculous word no-one can even pronounce?"
"That's… Yeah, I don't know. You have a point, though."
"Sorry," she whispers, looking down at her lap. "Zack drives me insane using all those terms all the time. Makes me feel stupid."
Harry doesn't say anything, but for once the silence between them doesn't feel uncomfortable.
She exhales the frustration out of her body, taking the cup to her mouth and sipping carefully in case it burns her tongue.
The coffee touches her lips, and its sweetness automatically invades all of her senses. Her tongue tastes the caramel, and there's something bitter behind it, but it is mostly mellow and buttery. Just like she remembers it.
And just like that, she's remembering all of it.
She's flooded with memories from the comfort of home, and about the fun of living. Memories with simpleminded thoughts and unpretentious actions.
She's back to a place where she isn't scared of speaking her mind all the time, where she isn't afraid of letting people down by her silly behavior, where she isn't terrified of her personality being the embarrassment of those around her. She's back to a place where she knows her friends and family like her for who she is, and where she's proud of her because of that.
She's full of affectionate touches, sincere words, and genuine feelings.
There's confidence inside her, and an entire world she's willing to find out.
And when she finally gulps down the simplest sip of caramel coffee, warmth takes over her throat. It reverberates through every inch of her body, and she shivers — her body filling with goosebumps as she closes her eyes to the paradoxical feeling.
A moment passes, and the weight of a soft textured fabric lands on her back.
"Before you say anything," Harry's deep voice murmurs next to her, and she opens her eyes to look at him. "I'm not wearing it. And it's driving me insane seeing you so cold, so please just wear it."
Aurora glances at her shoulders, finding Harry's checked jacket covering her skin. It feels good, and it feels warm. And she actually doesn't mind it. At all. But there's something about the way Harry has just talked to her that flies directly into Aurora's heart.
Maybe it's the softness of his voice. Or maybe how worried he sounded. Or maybe the fact that he seems to pay attention to her. Or maybe just because he acts as if he knows her so well. Even after so many years without talking to her. Or seeing her.
Or maybe it's just because she's already on edge because of the damn caramel coffee he bought especially for her.
She doesn't know exactly what it is, but something in his words triggers her into instantly tearing up. She can't help the overreaction, and before she can figure out a way to hide it, the evidence of her crying falls down her cheek, and she's taking a hand up to wipe it off her.
"Auri, hey…"
Harry's hand lands on her back. The last push she needs to turn into an emotional wreck. A sob bursts out of her chest, and she covers her mouth. Oh my God.
"Auri, love, I'm sorry… Did I… I can get the jacket back, I didn't—"
She shakes her head and puts the coffee between her thighs, then takes both hands up to her face. She uses her palms to wipe down the tears from her cheeks, and a long and shaky sigh leaves her mouth.
Harry takes the cup from between her legs, putting it down on the floor before shifting closer to her. His knees bump into the side of her thigh, and the hand that isn't on her back brushes softly her jaw, getting rid of another tear.
"I'm… I'm sorry," she whispers. "You're fine. You didn't… You didn't do anything wrong."
The last thing she wants is for him to see her like that. They haven't seen each other for so long… She doesn't want to welcome him back to her life with tears and drama. She also doesn't want him to feel guilty about something that has nothing to do with him.
"Ok…" He sounds wary, and while one hand rubs circles on her back, the other grabs her hand. "What's going on, tho? What can I do to help?"
Once again, Aurora shakes her head. "I'm… I'm fine. I think I'm just… I'm just exhausted from not sleeping last night."
It isn't a lie, but it also isn't the truth. She doesn't want to admit how lonely she constantly feels, because she wants to learn how to be alone. It doesn't make sense to ask for help when all she wants is to learn how to not need help.
"Why didn't you sleep?"
"It's nothing. Really… Don't worry about me, I'm just being dramatic right now."
He strokes his thumb up and down on the back of her hand, and Aurora sighs, leaning into the warmth of his jacket.
Warmth. Apparently that's all she craves now.
"Of course I worry about you, Auri. And I'm here if you need anything, ok?"
She nods, but his care for her brings another wave of tears, and she hides behind one hand while the other holds tightly onto him.
"C'mere," he murmurs, dragging the hand on her back to her shoulder and pulling her to his chest.
She can't believe the amount of times she's been hugged by him in merely a couple of hours, but she doesn't fight him. In fact, she does quite the opposite: she snuggles into him and cries quietly. And when Harry squeezes her shoulders, she squeezes his fingers in response.
"Talk to me, love, please. What's going on?"
She sniffs. "Nothing…"
He rubs her arm, softly and tenderly, then carefully adds, "I don't wanna force you, but I can tell something's up and I'm worried about you."
Aurora shakes her head, feeling the desperation in her body slip out of her mouth as she cries to him. "Please don't... I don't want… I don't wanna worry you, ok? I really don't. I don't want to bother you. I'm just… Overreacting. I'll be fine. I'll be—"
"Auri, that's not—"
"Yes. Yes it is. It's just—"
"Stop doing that," he says, squeezing her shoulder. "You keep shutting me off every time I try to explain myself."
"Sorry, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to, I swear. I'm sorry—"
"Auri—
"—I'm so sorry—"
"—It's okay—"
"—I really am—"
"Auri, hey!" He pulls back, grabbing her shoulders with both hands and forcing her to look at him. His eyes are warm and caring as he stares inside hers, but there's a frown all over his face that screams something different. Annoyance, perhaps? Or maybe… Frustration? "Listen to me. It's fine, ok? There's no need for you to apologize. It's fine."
She squeezes her eyes shut, shaking her head. "No…"
"Yes, it's fine, Auri."
"It's not—"
"Yes—"
"No!" Aurora opens her eyes, but tears quickly blurry her sight. She blinks, and before she knows it, she's fully sobbing and crying again. "It's not fine! Ok?! I'm not… I'm not fine, Harry. I'm not! I'm falling apart and I just… It's like I can't stop… And I just… I hate it, ok? I really do… I keep letting everyone down. And I… Fuck… I have no idea how… How am I supposed to spend the entire weekend…. The entire weekend pretending my life isn't a mess right now? I just… I can't… I can't pretend… I'm not… I can't…"
There's only a beat of silence before Harry pulls her into his chest again, squeezing her shoulders while he takes a long, deep, and heavy breath in. Then exhales loudly through his nose.
"I don't know what's going on with your life right now," he says softly, resting his chin on the top of her head and closing his eyes while she sobs into his chest. "And I know I haven't been around, but I'm here for you, ok?"
And just like before, Aurora melts into him. She hugs his waist, and leans against his body despite the uncomfortable and public position they're in. Crying all the tears she's been holding in so far. Silently sharing with him all the hurt, the doubts, and the insecurities she's been feeling. All the blaming, the questioning, and the yelling she's been hiding. Letting him absorb the wreck she is turned into after six years of marriage. All the failures. All the mistakes. All the countless "should've done better", and also "should've tried harder". She lets it all out. With no hold backs, nor regrets.
"And you don't have to pretend, Auri," he adds. "At least not to me. Not even a little bit. Never… Why would you even pretend, huh? I can't be there for you if you don't let me know your life's a mess, and I want to be there for you. You know I do, yeah?"
Aurora can't answer him, not when her body's turning everything inside her into tears and sobbing, but he doesn't seem to be waiting for any words. Nor reactions. He rubs her back gently, while still holding her tightly, and then just keeps talking.
"Besides, I don't expect anything from you, so—I mean, wait… That's not—Shit. That didn't sound good."
And despite everything, despite all the pain and all the tears and all the fears, a soft and low chuckle escapes from Aurora's chest.
"That came out wrong… It's not—It's not what I wanted to say. Because of course I expect things from you, like… You're brilliant. You're amazing. You can do amazing things if you want to, ok? I know you can. What I meant is that—That there's no pressure, y'know? That's all. And that no matter what you do or what you say, nothing will change... I mean, I haven't been around, but you don't have to pretend things are good if they aren't, y'know? I'll be your friend even if… I don't know… Even if everything's falling apart… Actually, I want to be there especially when everything's falling apart, ok? So yeah, I just—Jesus Christ." He sighs. "Fuck. Auri please tell me you know what I'm trying to say here because I'm just freaking myself out right now."
Aurora's chuckle turns into laughter, and she nods against his chest, taking one hand up to her face to wipe off the last few tears.
"I do, yes." She clears her throat, trying to get rid of some of the scratchiness. "Relax. I got it from the beginning."
Harry smiles and sighs again, squeezing her shoulders. "Could've said something, huh? Stop me there. Save me the embarrassment, maybe?"
"You said I kept cutting you off when you tried to explain yourself, so…" Aurora shrugs.
"Ohh, I see. Okay." Harry laughs. "We should work on your timing, then. Smartass."
She smiles, and sniffs. "My timing's perfect. It was cute, and I was having fun."
"Of course you were."
Although she can't see him, the smile is obvious in his voice, and she sighs. A long and heavy sigh. One that's strong enough to relax her entire body, and that makes her close her eyes and drop her shoulders.
"Thank you," she murmurs, still into his chest.
"Yeah," he murmurs back. "Anytime, love."
There's a pause between them. And then Harry speaks again.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"Not really, to be honest… At least not right now."
"Ok…"
Another pause, and then…
"Is there anything I can do to help?"
She takes a deep, long breath in, then exhales while snuggling into his chest.
"Can we just… Stay like this for another minute? Just… Y'know… In silence?"
"Hm… So you want me to shut up, is that it?"
Aurora chuckles.
"Well, I wouldn't put it like that, but…"
Harry chuckles, too.
"'S fine. I don't mind. We can stay like this for as long as you want."
And so they do.
They hug for a while. In silence. A tight embrace that's simple, but that's also intense enough to let her know that he's there for her.
Aurora can't remember the last time she's been held like this, with honest tenderness and affection. The kind of hug that she doesn't question, and that comes naturally. That feels natural.
"This was supposed to be a fun weekend," she murmurs, curling a little bit more into him and closing her eyes to avoid facing the world. "Can't believe I'm seeing you for the first time in years and already bringing all this drama to you."
Harry chuckles lightly.
"Don't be silly, ok? We've been over this already… We're friends and this is what friends are for." He kisses the top of her head, and then rests his cheek against the same place. "Besides, we didn't leave London yet. We can still have plenty of fun."
Aurora sighs. "God. I really need to have some fun. I miss having fun."
"I'll make sure you get more than some."
He squeezes her shoulder, and Aurora smiles.
Still with her eyes closed, and pressing her ear against his chest, she listens to his heartbeat, and to the way he breathes. He isn't calm, but he is steady, and somehow comfortable. So she focuses on him, and only him. As if mimicking his rhythm, or syncing with his pace, could make everything in her life feel better.
Harry sighs against her, and when the thumping inside him gets faster, she pulls one arm from around his waist to rest her hand on the left side of his chest. She spreads her fingers open where his heart is, and breathes in and out slowly, hoping to calm him down again.
He takes one hand to her neck, sliding it to the back of her head and tangling his fingers with her hair.
As he scratches her scalp, Aurora can feel every muscle of her body fully relaxing. It's soothing. And it's safe. There's no other place she would rather be right now, and she's convinced that, as long as she's holding him and he's holding her, she'll finally relax and rest like she hasn't been able to in so long.
"Have you always been such a great hugger?" she asks, her voice as soft and as slow as her body feels.
Harry clears his throat, then murmurs, "I don't know."
Aurora hums.
Another moment passes, until she breaks the silence again.
"I'm sorry for being a shitty friend."
"You're not a shitty friend."
"But I am, tho. I have no idea what's going on with your life… It's been so long and I… I never reached out."
Harry sighs, and shifts on his seat.
Aurora follows his movements, making sure the hug doesn't end even when he seems to be pulling away.
He doesn't, though — pull away. He simply leans back on his seat, pulling her along with him. And because she's still comfortable against his chest, she doesn't see the way his face falls, how he presses his lips together in a hard line, or glares at random people passing by.
"It's fine," he eventually says.
And she's so focused on her own past behavior, that she also doesn't notice the slight change in his voice.
"It's not, though."
"I never reached out either, did I? And I should have… I just… I should have."
She fidgets with the fabric of his shirt, and although it takes her a moment to answer, the words fly easily out of her mouth. "I'm not sure if it would've made any difference, to be honest… I've pushed everyone away, would've done the same to you."
"There's no fucking way I would've let you."
"It wouldn't be up to you, tho."
A ding-ding-dong blares from the speakers in the lounge area.
"Attention passengers on Ryanair flight 1832 to Naples, we are now ready for boarding at gate 56. Passengers on Ryanair flight 1832 to Naples, we are now ready for boarding at gate 56. Boarding is for business class and passengers with…"
The attendant's voice fades as Aurora stops paying attention to it. She blinks her eyes open and, against her wishes, pulls away from Harry's arms.
"Finally," she breathes out.
When she looks at him, she finds nothing but honesty and affection inside his eyes, and it's enough to make her heart skip a beat.
She curves her lips into a smile, then brings her hands up to wipe the dry tears from her cheeks. "Thank you."
Harry smiles, too. "You've said that already."
"I know." She nods, dropping her hands back to her lap. "I just… Thank you, really. For now and… And for the coffee. Even though I forgot to drink it."
He takes one hand to her face, and puts some of her hair behind her ear.
"We'll have time for another one," he says, then stares into her eyes again. "Yeah?"
"Yeah…" She gulps down, captivated by his gaze. "I think… I think it'd be nice if we could catch up, right? I mean, there's so much about you that I don't know…"
Harry smiles, although it doesn't reach his eyes.
"There isn't anything crazy to know about me."
Aurora furrows her brows.
"Well I don't need crazy information, Harry," she scoffs, making sure the tone of her voice is carrying some playfulness while she rolls her eyes. "I just wanna know what's up with your life… Where do you live? Do you have any dogs, or cats? Where do you work? Do you have a girlfriend? Do you have any kids? Are you married? I don't know…"
Harry stares blankly at her for a moment, then looks away, reaching for their bags.
"Those are too many questions, love."
Aurora shrugs.
"Well, yeah…" She leans down and picks up her coffee. The cup feels cold, and although she's sad she didn't get to drink it, she wouldn't change anything about what happened in the last… Well, however long it's been since they got here. "I know. I'm curious. That's why I said it'd be nice to catch up."
She stands up and rearranges Harry's jacket, putting it on properly so it doesn't fall from her shoulders, then waits while he stands as well, picking their bags from the seat next to his.
"Ok, yeah. Sure. We can catch up."
"Wow." She snorts and widens her eyes. "Calm down, now. Don't sound sooo excited, please."
Harry laughs. He puts his own bag on his shoulder, and she takes hers from his hand.
"I'd love for us to catch up, Auri. I really would."
"Okay…" She narrows her eyes at him, putting her bag on her shoulder and walking towards the line. "Are you hiding something from me?"
Harry follows her, grabbing his boarding pass and passport from the front pocket of his bag. "Why would I hide something from you?"
"I don't know…" She throws the coffee cup away, then adds, "Maybe you're working with the FBI. Or, maybe you're married to someone who works for the FBI. Ohhhhh," — she widens her eyes, looking at him while he leads their way to the gate — "or maybe, you're married to someone who's being investigated by the FBI!"
Harry chuckles through his nose. He sneaks his hands inside Aurora's bag, pulling her boarding pass and passport from it.
"There's no FBI involved, I promise," he says, handing her the items.
"Hmmm…" She grabs her things from his hand, and nibbles her bottom lip before asking, "But you're married to someone?"
"Nop."
"Okay… Dating to someone?"
He shakes his head, and Aurora nods.
"Are relationships a touchy subject, maybe?"
Harry smirks, and that's more than enough to give Aurora an answer, but she still waits for him to say something.
Anything.
"I broke up with someone not too long ago." He shrugs. "So I'm not in the mood for relationships right now, to be honest. And that includes talking about it."
The line moves quickly, and they take a step forward.
"Oh, sure. Yeah. I get it. Of course." Aurora nods. "I'm sorry, tho. Y'know, that it didn't work out."
He shrugs, and they walk again.
"'S fine."
The shift in his behavior is loud and clear, and it bothers her. The idea of someone breaking Harry's heart deep enough for the pain to overshadow his excitement and dull the brightness of his smile doesn't feel right. So it bothers her. It really does. Whoever it was, he surely deserved someone much better. He surely deserves someone better.
A flight attendant welcomes them with a grin and a cheerful good morning. Aurora smiles back, and hands him her passport and boarding pass, then waits for him to return them. He wishes her a safe flight, and repeats the same process with Harry.
Aurora waits for him in silence, and once they're both ready to walk through the airgate, she picks the conversation back on.
"I'm sure you'll find someone, y'know? It won't be that hard. You're still young, and dating was never a problem for you, so…"
There's a pause, and then Harry snorts. "Dating was never a problem for me? What's that supposed to mean?"
"Y'know… That's what you, Niall and Jayden used to do all the time, wasn't it? Dating and… Flirting and hooking up with everyone?"
Harry stops walking and turns to stare at her in silence, with widened eyes and flared nostrils.
Aurora stops, too, biting her lip to hold back her amusement while waiting for him to say something.
He doesn't, but he eventually laughs, throwing his head back and making her fully smile at him. He shakes his head, and starts walking again.
"Jeez, Auri, I'm so offended right now."
"Oh c'mon…" She chuckles, following his steps. "I meant it as a compliment, okay? Like… Girls were always into you, that's all."
"Not all girls, though."
"Fine." She shrugs. "Ninety-five percent of them, then."
He snorts again. "Ok."
"How old were you when we met? Twenty? Twenty-one?"
"Nineteen."
"Oh shit, really?"
"Yeah, it was my second year. Why?"
"Nothing. I think… For a moment I just forgot you're so much younger than me, that's all."
"C'mon, not so much, I'm almost thirty now."
"Well, yes, but I'm thirty-five."
"See? Same age."
She chuckles. "We're not the same age."
"Ok, but almost."
"Not even close, Harry."
"Oh c'mon! Then what are you now? Ancient? Should I call you grandma?"
She chuckles. "Well… I do feel ancient, to be honest."
He rolls his eyes. "This is ridiculous. You're just as young as I am."
She shakes her head.
"Yeah, I mean, I know that… But I don't know… I mean, talking to you right now I don't feel like you're younger, y'know? Let alone that much. But also—"
"It's not that much."
"No, I know. But if you think about it, I already got married and I have a four-year-old at home, so like, I really am too old and—What?" Harry is frowning at her, and she tilts her head. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
He shrugs, then faces forward, away from her. "I'm trying to decide if I should kick your ass right now or just throw you into the ocean later."
She gasps, but then she chuckles. "What? Whyyy?"
Harry raises his eyebrows at her. "I'm only five years younger than you, Auri. Five. It's not even a big deal."
She sighs.
The line in front of them moves, and they move forward as well.
"Sorry. You're right. Like I said, it doesn't feel like it right now, but I think… I don't know. When you were 19 and I was 24 it was different, yeah? I mean, we were in different stages of our lives. I was meeting Zack and you were—"
"Yes, I know. I was there, remember?"
She swallows down, and nods.
"Sorry," she repeats, much softer this time.
Aurora walks in silence, staring at the plane at the end of the hallway.
She pretends to ignore the way Harry keeps glancing at her, or how he rubs the back of his neck, or how he rolls his shoulders. She knows she bothered him, and the idea of causing a scene when they're about to get into a plane feels terrifying. She should've kept her mouth shut, that way she wouldn't have them put them in that situation. Again.
It's like she's been riding on a rollercoaster she never knew she would get into in the first place. Going through multiple sudden changes of speed and directions. Slowly climbing a steep slope and painfully anticipating the fall before she actually drops directly into the ground. Holding herself during the unexpected tight turns and sharp curves, and gasping for air at every inverted loop. Experiencing the ups and downs of gravity as she's weightless and happy at the top of the hill, then all of a sudden her own personality is pushing her back down to reality. And by the end of it, the back of her throat hurts, her stomach feels funny, and there's just heaviness all over her body.
"Hey," Harry calls.
He shifts his bag from one shoulder to the other and puts his arm around her, pulling her closer even though they're still walking. He kisses the top of her head, and keeps his lips there as he speaks. "'M sorry. Shouldn't have cut you off like that."
Aurora shrugs. "It's fine."
"It's not. We were just joking and I… I took it personally, 'm sorry."
He kisses her head, again, and her lashes flutter.
She knows he's sorry, but she doesn't know what to say to him. She knows how easy it is for her to forgive when she shouldn't, and how many times in the last six years she believed in empty apologies.
So although she knows, she isn't sure she can trust herself.
She hasn't been trusting herself for a while now.
A new flight attendant welcomes them into the plane, and they both pull away from each other.
Aurora walks in front of Harry, and she does her best to smile genuinely at the cheerful woman that's wishing them a good morning and a good flight.
She holds the strap of her bag tightly on her shoulder, and walks through the narrow carpeted aisle, focusing on the numbers and letters above the seats as if she's looking for specific ones. She pauses here and there for other passengers that are getting settled, and it's only past the emergency door that Harry speaks again.
"Should we sit here?" he asks. He's pointing to the opposite side where she's facing, so she turns around, finding three empty seats.
"Okay."
She nods, and tilts her chin up to check the space to put her bag. Harry is quicker, though, because he is already closing his fingers around the strap on her shoulder and pushing it away from her arm.
"I'll put our bags together, yeah?"
She doesn't want to fight him about it, so she simply thanks him with the best smile she can offer and allows him to easily grab her duffel bag.
She slides through the two empty seats to reach the one by the window, not waiting any longer to secure the seat belt and make herself comfortable. Once she's settled, she clasps her hands together, and takes a deep breath in. Her chin trembles, and she looks down, biting the inside of her cheek. She doesn't want to cry again. She really doesn't want to cry again.
Also, she needs to sleep. She must get some sleep. There is absolutely no way she is going to handle spending the entire day awake, and if she doesn't sleep now, she'll only get an opportunity again at the yacht — meaning she won't get to spend any time with her friends.
Harry sits next to her and puts his own belt on, then turns off his phone and shoves it into his pocket. Aurora doesn't look at him, but he turns sideways anyway, leaning his shoulder on the back of the seat and blocking them from any possible curious eyes.
He grabs one of her hands from her lap and takes her fingers to his mouth, placing a long kiss to her knuckles before sighing.
"Auri, love," his voice is soft, and a whisper for only them to hear, "I really am sorry."
She nods, taking her free hand to wipe a tear before it could roll down her cheek.
Shit.
"Please, don't cry."
"Mhm."
"Auri… Look at me, please."
She shakes her head, then. Because she knows that she'll fall apart all over again if she looks at him.
God, she's so tired.
"I didn't…" she murmurs, then takes a deep breath and tries again. "I didn't mean anything bad by the age thing… I promise."
"I know that, love. Of course I know," he says, pressing another kiss to her hand. "Fuck. I know. We were just joking. And I'm not mad about it, I promise. I mean, I was actually a stupid hormonal teenager back when we met, so yeah… You're right, things were different. But please, Auri, I hate that I made you cry just because I… Shit, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. It wasn't about you, I promise."
She stares at her knees and nods, because she knows he is. And she also knows she can trust him, which is probably why she — finally — honestly blurts out, "I keep messing everything up, y'know? All the time."
He brushes his thumb on the back of her hand, then murmurs back to her, "What do you mean?"
"I don't know. I just… I keep letting everyone down, and I hate it, but it's like I can't stop it. And I mean, to be honest I don't… I don't even recognize myself anymore. I used to have so much fun, and I felt so different about life… And I treated people around me so differently… And now I'm just… I don't know… I don't know why I say things, or why I do things. I don't know what I want, or what to do with my life… And I feel so… Lonely… All the damn time. But I get why I'm lonely, y'know? I mean it's true that I don't know how to be anything else besides being Noah's mum. And I'm so insensitive to other people because of that, and I keep saying things I shouldn't and I just… I look back and I realize how I pushed everyone away… How I… I don't know, I'm so tired of this. I'm just so tired of myself."
There is a pause between them, mostly because Harry's waiting for the people in front of them to settle and stop prying at their conversation.
It's good, though, because it gives her time to catch her breath again.
And then, Harry leans deeper into his seat, still holding tightly to her hand.
"Is that how he made you feel?"
Aurora furrows her brows. "What—Who?"
"Zack. Is that how Zack made you feel?"
"I… No! Why—I mean, I'm just… I'm talking about myself."
"Auri, c'mon… I know you're talking about yourself, but I can read between the lines."
She closes her eyes and takes her hand up to her face, rubbing her forehead while she prepares herself to just keep blurting out what her mind is begging her to tell him.
"I think…" she says, dropping her hand back to her lap and blinking. "I think he really messed me up, y'know?"
Harry sighs.
It takes him a moment to say something. A moment that feels really, really long to her.
And then…
"Fuck." He puts his arm around her shoulders and pulls her to his chest, murmuring while resting his cheek on the back of her head, "I'm sorry."
She shrugs, snuggling into him and searching for his heartbeat, just like before.
"'S not your fault."
"But I should've been there for you."
"You wouldn't have known."
"Still… This isn't how it was supposed to be."
God, she's so tired…
Her entire body is heavy, and she doesn't even know what's happening around them anymore. She can't even make sense of their conversation anymore.
Harry feels too cozy, though, and she knows she's about to have the comfiest sleep of her life — she can feel it.
"Harry?"
"Hm?"
"I got divorced six months ago."
Harry closes his eyes, then rearranges himself on his seat and pulls her closer to him.
"I know."
.
.
.
"You know? How?"
"Niall."
"Oh. Okay?"
"I texted him while you were getting your coffee."
She places her hands on his hips, holding her weight to pull away from him.
Harry doesn't let her, though, squeezing her inside of his arms and locking her in.
"Please stay," he murmurs.
And Aurora doesn't fight him. She just relaxes again — she relaxes and listens to him.
"You weren't wearing a ring… And I could tell something was up, so I… I asked him. That's all. Sorry if I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help it. I needed to know."
"Oh…" The concept of time is foggy inside her mind, but she's pretty sure a few seconds go by before she speaks again. "'S okay, I guess. I mean… Niall knows about the divorce, but he doesn't… He doesn't know the whole story. He doesn't know how bad it was."
"Does anyone know?"
"You?" She chuckles, but it's humorless, because she knows that not even Harry truly knows. "I just… I haven't been able to talk about it yet, or like… Process it, I think. I don't know. I keep justifying him a lot, which I'm learning it's something I shouldn't do."
He makes his cheek comfortable on top of her head, then takes one hand to play with her hair, scratching her scalp. "It can't be easy to go through something like this on your own, tho."
"I know…" She closes her eyes, appreciating his affectionate touch. "My mum's helping me a lot… She had to go back home now, but she spent over a month with me. Makes sure I don't skip therapy… Stuff like that."
"Hmm…" Harry says, and his voice echoes inside her body. "Always liked her. Smart one."
Aurora curls her mouth up. "Yeah…"
Another moment goes by, and Aurora is filled with lightness as her body slowly drifts into sleep.
"Thank you for telling me this, Auri."
"Mhmm… It's weird… To like, talk about it."
"I'll always listen. Whenever you want to talk about it, I'll listen."
"Thank you… 'M really tired, tho... And I think my brain is going to explode…"
Harry chuckles. "Get some sleep, yeah? I'll wake you up when we're about to land."
"'Mkay." She hugs his waist, and nuzzles against his chest. "Can't believe this all happened and we didn't even leave the country yet."
"Tell me about it."
"Mm… 'Kay… I'll sleep now… You're comfy… And I think… I feel drunk…"
Chuckling again, Harry presses a kiss on the top of her head, then slides down a bit on his seat, and she cuddles a little bit more into him.
"Ok love," he says. "You can relax now, I got you."
And although Aurora doesn't answer, she knows he does.
She doesn't need Harry to wake her up.
Her brain drifts back to consciousness by itself, slowly making her aware of her surroundings way before the plane is even close to landing.
She's warm, because of Harry's arms wrapped around her shoulders, but also because of his jacket covering her body. Her face is pressed against his shirt, and once again she's breathing from his skin. He still smells good — like a fresh shower — but now it's also mixed with a little bit of sweat, so it's somehow even better than before.
It's hot. He's hot. Her insides feel hot.
She's also comfortable — so, so comfortable. It feels like she just took the best nap of her entire life. Like she's enveloped by a sense of calm and peace, a feeling that she doesn't want at all to end. Snuggled into his chest while his fingers keep playing with her hair, tracing random patterns on the back of her head. The movements are sweet, sweet enough to tempt her to go back to sleep. And she almost does.
Except she can't. Not anymore.
Because above all that, she can tell she's also kind of desperate. Clingy. Needy. Hugging his waist as if their flight landing in Italy depended on how tight her grip is. Both of her legs over his left thigh. His strong, firm thigh. She's holding onto him like a baby koala. A troubled one. A baby koala that's craving to be held by someone. Anyone. And as if she's terrified of the idea of being left behind while her mind shuts off from the real world.
And maybe she is. Who knows.
She always liked to cuddle, and she hasn't properly cuddled in a really long time, so it's not a surprise. Still, it very quickly becomes embarrassing, and certainly not how Harry imagined things to go when, earlier in the airport, he offered his shoulder for her to take a quick nap.
He offered his shoulder, not his entire body, for fucks sake!
So, against all wishes, Aurora stirs and groans — mostly because her mind is battling between sleeping for just two more minutes or acknowledging the reality of the world she's in — then pulls away from him.
"Hmm…" She takes her hands up to her face, and rubs the last traces of sleepiness away from her puffy eyes, then sits back on her seat. "What time is it?"
Next to her, Harry moves as well, withdrawing his arms from around her shoulders and placing his hands on his lap.
"Must be around ten thirty now… Last time I checked was ten fifteen."
He sounds calm, so calm that she can't make any emotion out of his voice, so she turns her head to look at him.
Harry looks fully awake. Well rested. Peaceful. Soft. The only sign of him turning into her personal pillow are the wrinkles all over his shirt, but everything else looks… Perfect. Like heaven. He looks like heaven.
"Hi…" He curls one side of his mouth up, and Aurora smiles, too.
"Hi…"
Only then it occurs to her that she's been staring at him, and she looks away, taking her hands to smooth out her hair then fix her dress.
"Did you sleep well?"
She nods, and takes his jacket off, instead using it like a blanket to cover her chest.
"Um, yeah… I did. Thanks. And thanks for… You know… Letting me crush on you? I mean, it probably wasn't comfortable for you, so… Yeah, thanks."
Harry scoffs, shuffling down on his seat and spreading his legs as wide open as he can.
"Are you kidding me?" He takes both arms up and places his hands behind his head, resting on top of the palm of his hands. "You're a great cuddler. Went straight to my top five of all time."
The playfulness is clear in his words, which is why Aurora chuckles. Still, one question is loud and clear inside her mind: who are the other four great cuddlers? And most importantly, why isn't she his favorite one?
The thoughts bring an uncomfortable feeling to her stomach, and she shifts on her seat.
"That's kind of you to say, but you should see me during winter in the middle of the night… I'm like a baby koala and it's not a very pretty sight."
"Huh." He smirks, and lifts his eyebrows. "Is that an offer?"
Aurora snorts and rolls her eyes, feeling her cheeks burn before she looks away. "Shut up."
Harry laughs, and just like that, everything between them goes back to normal.
Getting into conversation with him is easy. Neither of them have seen their friends in a while, so they distract themselves by reminiscing old stories and laughing at silly things they used to do together. They also talk about Italy, about how neither of them have been to the country before, and how it's been a dream of both of them. They bond over small details, and find connections over silly things. And it's exactly what Aurora needs, as she finds out after minutes and minutes of light conversation and genuine giggles.
It is only when they're about to land that her face falls again.
Fully awake, the airplane movements become way more obvious than they did when taking off. And as soon as the belt sign goes on, and the pilot announces they're about to descend to Naples, Aurora's heartbeat speeds up.
She straightens up and leans her back fully against her seat, looking through the window at the bright sky.
"Are you ok?" Harry asks.
"Mhm…" She nods, and doesn't take her eyes off from the view. "Just… I don't like this part very much, that's all."
"Wanna hold my hand?"
It is a nice offer, but one she doesn't think she should accept. So she doesn't. And as the plane gets closer and closer to land, every movement becomes even more clear. When it shakes, when it turns, when it's getting ready to touch the ground.
She holds herself until the last minute. She holds herself tightly and firmly. Until it becomes too much, and one specific up and down of the airplane has her reaching for his hand.
It's like Harry is already waiting for her, to be honest, because she finds him quickly. Her sweaty and cold palm meets his warm one, and she turns her head to look at him.
He's already watching her, and as soon as their eyes meet, his face lights up with a smile.
Her belly quivers, and her chest tightens.
"It'll be over in a minute," he says, squeezing her hand.
She nods, and swallows down, because it's the only thing she can do right now. She knows what he's talking about, and she knows it's true — they'll land, and everything will pass.
Although something tells her that, whatever she's feeling right now, will not go away. It won't be over in a minute. It won't be over even when they're out and away from the plane.
In fact, she's starting to believe that, as soon as Harry is next to her, looking at her like that, the fluttering in her stomach will never go away.
if you've made it here, say caramel coffee :')
also, thank you for reading.
dani :)
PART THREE
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new beginnings | may 27 - june 2
note: before i start this, i just want to warn y'all that it's 24.4k. if you want to read this in one sitting, i recommend locking in.
please hit me up in my inbox to give me feedback! or your thoughts! or speculation on what's coming next! i want you guys to talk to me all the time and tell me every thought you have. if i could send each of you the google document and force you to leave comments, i would.
also, i think by the time this fic is finished, it might be long enough to be a novel. should we all work together to get it published?
1:90 – TREVOR
“Do we really think it’s a good idea to spend the summer down here instead of the Michigan house?” Jack asks. “We own that one, after all.”
“Everyone knows about the Michigan house,” Trevor points out.
Cole, who had plotted this with Trevor after last summer’s debacle, sighs. “We can’t keep having the same conversation. We decided that we would train at the Checkers’ rink when we can get down to Charlotte and use the cement slab as our own rink in the yard of the rental house in the meantime. So that’s not your problem. So, what is, Jack? You’re gonna miss the girls?”
Jack fixes Cole with a cutting glare. “Fuck off.”
“You know, there are girls in North Carolina,” Cole says, a grin dimpling his cheeks. “Sweet, southern belles, even.”
Jack rolls his eyes. “I can’t wait for the rest of the goons to get here. We’ll put it to a fucking vote and I’ll get to go home.”
“If you want to go home so bad, why don’t you?” Trevor asks. “We’re not forcing you to be here.”
“You triple-belted me in the backseat,” Jack argues. “You’re taking me away from Michigan and you can’t even let me have shotgun.”
“Talk, talk, talk,” Trevor mocks. “You have hands. And fingers. You’re not helpless.”
Jack huffs from his spot in the back, stubbornly turning his head to the right to watch the trees pass. Cole does the same from the passenger seat, tapping his fingers along the pane of the window.
There are twenty miles, an hour total, still on the GPS. Trevor hasn’t seen a town since they stopped at the gas station at the bottom of the mountain, the closest city being Winston-Salem almost an hour and a half ago, barely more than sparse houses and fields in the time since. They’re driving along a stream now and the latest exit off this small, two lane highway said “Love Valley.” Trevor snickers at the sign and goes to point it out to Jack, but Jack beats him to it.
“Don’t, Z.”
“It’s funny, dude.”
“It’s not, though.”
Cole cranks the volume up, drowning out the continuing argument that floats forward from the backseat.
They drive on and Trevor thinks about it– everything. They have three unobscured months in Litchton, the only people knowing about their whereabouts are their families and coaches. The goons, as Jack referred to them, would be joining them sometime in the next day or two. Quinn and Luke had to wrap up some loose ends at home (Quinn, closing up his apartment for the summer; Luke, visiting some college friends as their semester comes to an end.
Litchton was the safest bet and Krebs had mentioned North Carolina to Trevor in passing the one time they caught up throughout the year, heaving heard from Leschyshyn that the mountain towns of his home state were notoriously quiet and drama-free and that their inhabitants, although lovers of gossip, kept to themselves.
After those girls had snuck into the Michigan house at the end of the summer and started showing up wherever the boys went in the evenings, Trevor just wanted a summer off. He wanted time with his friends the way they used to have it, just working out together and drinking until they dropped, swimming and parading around the town like normal guys in their early twenties.
In Litchton, they could pretend to be guys that were home for the summer, ready to start some corporate finance or everyday-tie job. It was a look into what could’ve been, had they not dedicated their lives to their sport.
For three months, he gets to be Trevor Zegras, the kid who complained about his name being last on the roster in every class growing up and the kid who worked in his mom’s store after school. But he’s also Trevor Zegras, NHL superstar, ninth overall pick, owner of the best Michigan goal in the United States, so he might toss his name around in Litchton this summer. Just to see if it gets him anything.
If it doesn’t, his good looks certainly will. What’s flirting with a few old ladies on the street? It’ll be the highlight of their year.
Trevor misses the driveway the first time the car passes it. It’s hidden by brush and along a curve. The GPS reroutes them– but they have to drive an extra fifteen minutes along this road before they can turn around.
They drive into a small town, a strip of eclectic stores littering the main road. There’s a small grocery store with a fruit stand out front that Cole points to.
“We could pick up some food while we’re out here,” Cole suggests. Upon hearing Jack’s mouth open in the backseat, he continues, “Just so we don’t have to come back later.”
Jack slouches against the backseat, huffing about being cut off at the opportunity to express his discomfort.
“Jacky, will you relax? We’re going to have fun this summer.” Trevor tells him, turning into the parking lot and choosing a spot close to the entrance.
Cole laughs when Jack unbuckles his three seatbelts in the wrong order and has to untangle them. Trevor flips the mirror down and fudges his hair, fluffing the ends. He had gotten it cut just before they left for this trip, so the edges were still even and sharp.
Jack is the first to exit the car, practically throwing himself onto the pavement with his excitement to leave the vehicle behind, if only briefly. They’d been driving for hours. Cole flew into New York from Montréal, so Trevor had to pick him up from the airport. They picked Jack up in Jersey in the early morning and started driving south.
Trevor can’t blame Jack for his annoyance. They’ve been in the car with him for ten long hours and they forced the first stretch of driving on him, having spent about two hours in the car before getting him. He had just woken up and had to drive four hours through the traffic of Philly and into Baltimore. He napped while Cole drove down through most of Virginia, and then woke up grumpy anyway when Trevor took over to take on North Carolina.
It’s been a long fucking day.
They shop together, but they bicker quietly. After years of friendship, their arguments seem more like brotherly spats. The knowing smiles from the women in the grocery store prove that they’ve heard encounters like this before, likely in their own homes.
Eventually, Trevor rolls his eyes and goes to sit in the car. He leaves Cole and Jack to pay for the groceries. Upon leaving the store, he pulls his phone out of his pocket and pulls up Instagram, hoping to catch up on the posts that he had missed on the long drive.
Walking past the fruit stand out front, Trevor bumps into someone and he stumbles back.
“I’m sorry,” Trevor apologizes, reaching out and steadying the girl with a touch to her elbow. “I didn’t see you.”
“Hard to see me when you’re on your phone,” she replies with a tilted smile.
Trevor lets out a little laugh at her reply, barely a breath. “I’ll be more careful next time.”
She nods with an approving hum and turns back to the stand, picking up a peach and turning it over in her hand.
Trevor turns and walks to the car, climbing into the vehicle and settling behind the wheel. He watches the sliding door for his friends, but his eyes drift back to the girl.
She’s tied a red bandana in her hair and she slips peaches into her mesh bag. She talks to the vendor, using her hands to speak. She’s pretty, he realizes, far prettier than the girls he knows from California. The vendor hands her a basket of strawberries, which she takes carefully, inspecting the red berries by twisting the basket’s handle from side to side, spinning it. Trevor can see her profile this way– the slope of her nose, smooth. Her eyelashes, long. Her lips, pink and pursed into a little smile. Her stance is tilted, one hand on her hips.
Trevor is back outside the car before he can think. He approaches her as she pays for her fruit, standing behind her when she turns around.
She jumps when she sees him. “You’re still here?” She asks.
“No, but I’m back,” Trevor replies, realizing just how lame he sounds. “My friends and I are staying here for the summer and I just wanted to introduce myself.”
When he falls silent after explaining himself, she looks at him expectantly. He can see the bottoms of her teeth as her lips part. “So introduce yourself.” She gestures for him to go on.
“I’m Trevor,” he says, sticking his hand out. “My friends call me Z.”
Her eyes drop to his hand briefly. She considers it before reaching up and taking his hand, shaking it. “Why?” She asks.
“My last name starts with a Z,” Trevor supplies. “Zegras.” The smile he gives her is strained, expecting her eyes to light up in recognition. They do, but it’s not in the way he expects.
“You’re Greek?” She asks, her interest piqued.
“Yeah,” Trevor replies. “But not, like… Greek. I’m from New York, but I live in California now.”
At the mention of California, her face stiffens. She hums disapprovingly. “Got sick of the West Coast, I take it? Is that why you’re back east this summer?”
Trevor flounders for a moment. “I love California, but the guys and I always spend our summers together. Usually we’re in Michigan.”
“So y’all travel all around, huh?” She asks. She doesn’t sound impressed, which makes Trevor nervous. In fact, she sounds almost disdainful, but the look on her face appears as though she’s holding back a laugh. Whether that is at his expense, he doesn’t know.
“We’re very lucky,” Trevor confirms, nodding tightly. “Most of our travel is for work, though. We all work in the same industry and it involves a lot of, um, business trips.”
“Business trips?” She asks, letting the laugh overtake her this time as she looks him up and down. “You?”
Trevor looks down at his own outfit, the basketball shorts and loose t-shirt. They’re two of the few clothes he owns that are not branded with the Ducks logo. He scratches the back of his head sheepishly. “We’ve been driving a while and I wanted to be comfortable.”
“You certainly look comfortable,” She agrees with a nod, her grin knowing and wide.
“I didn’t catch your name,” Trevor says with a similar grin, shuffling forward just a step now that he’s got her smiling and laughing.
It’s then that Cole and Jack exit the grocery store, each with a hefty load of grocery bags on their arms. They’re laughing, so it appears Cole has managed to cheer up the sullen Jack in Trevor’s absence. Trevor watches the girl’s eyes leave his, drawn to the movement and volume of his two friends. He curses them in his mind, watching as they find him and decide to approach.
“I thought you were warming up the car, Z,” Jack accuses, his eyes flickering between Trevor and the girl. “D’you get distracted?”
Trevor bites his tongue before forcing a smile on his face. He turns back to the girl. “These are the some of the friends I mentioned, Jack and Cole. The other ones, Jack’s brothers, aren’t here yet.” Trevor knows he’s overexplaining, but he can’t help it. Something about this girl has him awkward and tongue-tied, yet his tongue can’t stop forming words and pushing them out.
“Yeah, your business partners.” She rubs a hand over her face, smoothing out the half-smile that was clearly keeping a laugh at bay. “Are they also from California?”
Cole snorts. “Business partners?” He repeats. “From California? No way. You’d never catch me dead in Anaheim, unless we’re playing there. Believe me, I’d be on the quickest flight back.”
“I just said we all worked in the same industry,” Trevor corrects, throwing on his most charming smile to try and salvage the situation. He wasn’t lying, but this girl might think he is, and that would be disastrous. He doesn’t know why, but it would be. He wants her to think highly of him and now he’s made two bad first impressions.
The second one is his friends’ fault, of course.
And she does think he’s lying– Trevor can tell by the way she looks him up and down, then Cole, then Jack. Her eyes squint imperceptibly at Cole’s mention of “playing” in Anaheim, rather than working. It was a statement that could have extended the conversation, but this girl seems to decide that she is uninterested.
She nods sarcastically, then scoffs quietly. “I have to go,” she says. “It was nice to meet you, Trevor. Have fun in Litchton this summer, boys.”
“Oh, we will,” Jack assures her. Trevor hates how his eyes rake over her, combing through each detail of her skin, her clothes, and her hair.
“Nice meeting you!” Cole calls after her as she walks away.
Both boys turn to Trevor, equally annoying smiles on their faces.
“Shut up,” he hisses before they can say anything.
“Who was that?” Cole asks.
“I didn’t get her name,” Trevor growls through gritted teeth. “She was just about to tell me and then the two of you showed up.”
“Boo-hoo,” Jack teases. “So you won’t be the first to bed a girl this summer, for… how many summers in a row is it now, Coley?”
Cole’s laughter breaks his face, but Trevor interrupts before he can speak.
“It’s not even a real competition, Jack. You only act like it is because you fuck the same girl every summer as soon as we get to the lake house. It’s trashy.”
“Being a winner isn’t trashy, Trev. In fact, maybe I should go follow after the girl you were just chatting up. I’ll show her how a real man flirts.”
“Shut the fuck up.” Trevor feels a flare of anger well up inside of him when Jack insinuates taking this girl for himself. It should be anger about questioning Trevor’s manhood, but it is not. “Get in the car.”
He stalks off, starting the car this time and situating himself behind the wheel. Jack vies for the passenger seat unsuccessfully, souring his mood yet again. Despite Cole’s smaller stature, Jack is the one left in the backseat with the bags of groceries around him. Soon, Trevor’s shirt joins him after a misguided throw to the trunk of the car where their luggage resides.
When they arrive at the house, Jack only carries the groceries inside. He claims he’s been stilted all day and Trevor can’t really do much to prove otherwise. Cole carries in his and Jack’s luggage into the home– a rental that Trevor paid good money to book for the entire summer.
“I get the best room!” Trevor yells after them. “I paid for it! I want the ensuite bathroom!”
“Go fuck yourself,” Jack replies. He’ll leave the room for Trevor to take anyway.
The three boys had planned this ahead of time. They would be in Litchton the whole summer, so they will take the three bedrooms that have king beds. Quinn and Luke will take the queen beds in the other bedroom, and the various guests throughout the summer will take the bunk beds in the basement. From the pictures alone, Trevor realizes that the house could sleep more than ten people. If they can find ten people, maybe they could throw a party.
and invite that girl, Trevor thinks.
He’s taken aback by the thought and its suddenness. He doesn’t even know her name or if he’ll see her again– so why is he thinking of her?
Trevor shakes the thought and grabs his bags from the back of the car. He used an extra practice bag from the bottom of his closet in Anaheim to pack his clothes for the summer, so he has a free hand to open the door that Cole closed behind him.
He finds the big bedroom easily and drops his bag in the closet, not bothering to unpack. He looks out the sliding door onto his porch, the wrap-around that encircles the entire back of the house. His porch holds two rocking chairs and a wooden bench. The house is built out of wood– almost overwhelmingly so– and the decorations match. His bedframe, his dresser, his bedside table, his small desk, the fan, even the blinds on the window… all of them are made of wood.
His bathroom has double sinks and a granite countertop. The handles are gold in color, but likely not in material. The spout of the sink is more like a water spigot that one might find outdoors, but it’s classy. When Trevor enters his bathroom, he’s in awe of the jacuzzi tub and shower on the other side of the room.
The tub and shower are both built from dark marble, bespeckled with lines of darker ore. The tub has wooden cabinets beneath the feet of marble on either side of the tub, which holds towels and toiletries on the right and left respectively. The tub has jets and a handheld spout that’s detachable. Trevor considers them. He can think of a use for both.
The shower is spacious with an overhead spout, wide and fancy. It has ledges for toiletries, as well as a seat in the corner. The door is glass and there is a hook for towels next to the opening. The shower stands from ceiling to floor, completely confined. Despite the windows to the side of it, the occupant of the shower would be completely hidden from sight, once the glass door steams up.
Trevor explores the house further, but doesn’t take up residence anywhere. Cole and Jack seem to have put the groceries away while he found his room and looked around. Now, they’re nowhere to be found. They’ve likely taken up residence in their bedrooms for the night, tired from their eleven hour drive.
Lord knows Jack needs sleep before he braves this vacation. He always gets grumpy when he’s tired, part of the reason why he naps prior to every game.
Trevor is glad that all of the boys can make it up for the summer. He can’t wait to get things started.
2:90 – HONEY
She wakes with the sunrise, as she does every Tuesday. It’s her first day of the week at the bookstore and she has to open. The Reading Nook is always closed on Mondays and she is one of three workers– the owner, Ada and her best friend since childhood, Bea. Ada opens the store on Thursday, whereas Bea opens it on Friday. Every other day of the week, the responsibility falls on her.
She makes her coffee and drinks it on her couch, looking out the window towards the mountains in the distance. It’s clear today and she can see the rows of mountains clearly– ten rows back. Once, her father had told her that if you could count ten rows back, you were looking at the mountains across state lines. If you could count ten mountains, then you could count all the way to Tennessee.
She believed him, until she realized that the sun always rises behind those mountains. She faces east. Tennessee is to the west.
Still, the memory comes with fondness. It was before she moved away from home to pursue a life of quietness in the mountains, her favorite place in the world. Those days are long in the past. She has no interest in returning to them, given how far she’s come. The only person from her hometown that was welcomed into this new life was Bea and she has proven time and time again that she is deserving of that role.
Not only did they grow up together, but she got her nickname because of her friendship with Bea. As children, a long-forgotten teacher had made a comment about the two being attached at the hip, stuck together like glue. She had corrected herself with a laugh, evidently feeling clever when she said: “No, more like a bee to honey, right, girls?” From that day on, she had only gone by Honey and Bea had shortened her name from Beatrice to keep the analogy.
She drives to The Reading Nook and unlocks the store, wiping the counter and sweeping the main room while she waits for her regular patrons to enter the store.
On Tuesdays, the “founding” women of Litchton convene in the bookstore and knit. Some days, Honey joins them. Others, she just wishes to sit and read at their table, listening in on the gossip of the week. The women are not so much founders as the grandmothers who lived in Litchton since their birth, having married and worked and raised families here. They are true Appalachian women– driven by superstition and fantastical solutions, lovers of a good story, and wonderful bakers who only crave to share their gift. They are churchgoers, often multiple times a week, and headstrong believers in their chosen politician. These are the attributes that Honey does not share with the women– she was an outsider, although she has been welcomed into the Litchton society since moving here. She attended church when the ladies asked her to, usually for the rare wedding or baptism. Rarer for a funeral, luckily. Honey does not feel any particular way about politics, at least not out loud, and she’s lucky that the ladies try to reserve that topic for the debates of their husbands over dinner parties, not the knitting circle on early Tuesday mornings.
Sacha is the first to arrive to the bookstore that morning, armed with blueberry muffins in a tupperware that Honey will have to wash in the little sink in the back while the women are knitting. Sacha has left one too many tupperwares and bowls in The Reading Nook and Honey won’t allow her to leave another behind.
Honey plates the muffins for Sacha while the elderly woman secures the long table in the store for her friends. It does not take long for Scarlett, Gillian, Vera, and Rosalind to join. The women each knit their own project, waking up over coffee and muffins before the gossip starts.
It begins with Vera’s son’s divorce, something she had been dreading since he proposed to his soon-to-be ex-wife while they were still students at NC State. They had moved to Raleigh permanently, an action that Vera believes started this whole thing. When her son left home, and his wife finally revealed that she didn’t want children, Vera knew it was over. Or so she said. Honey thinks that she’s just butthurt about her son fleeing the nest… ten years ago. She wonders, briefly, if her own mother feels this way about her.
Honey shakes herself out of her thoughts as soon as Scarlett introduces the next topic, the topic that Honey knew was coming since the night before.
“Did you see those young men at the store yesterday? I know you always do your shopping on Monday evenings, Rosalind.” Scarlett tilts her head like she’s conspiring with Rosalind, like Rosalind has been holding information from the group.
Rosalind nods, eyes glinting behind her wired glasses. “They were such handsome boys. Lord, I tell you, if I were a young lady nowadays…”
She trails off and Honey stifles a laugh, looking down at the counter. She can feel the ladies’ eyes on her, no doubt hoping that the mention of boys piques her interest. Honey knows how these ladies were in their day– boy crazy but also efficient, looking for the perfect match and settling for no less. All of them prevailed, although from their complaints, you would never know their husbands were the loves of their lives.
“Ladies, you know this conversation would be better suited for Bea,” Honey teases.
“Bea is too forthcoming, you are still somewhat of a mystery.” Gillian lifts an eyebrow.
“Where is Miss Bea?” Vera asks. “Wasn’t she supposed to be here half an hour ago?”
Honey doesn’t stifle her laugh this time. “Miss Vera!” She exclaims. “It is a Tuesday morning. You know Bea has no interest in showing up to work for at least another hour.”
Vera shakes her head. “You and Ada have got to stop allowing her to show up so late.”
Sacha laughs. “As if they could stop her if they tried!”
All of the women, and Honey, laugh at the joke. It’s well established in Litchton that Bea is the tardy sort, whereas everyone else prefers to be early or on time. Bea has the attitude of a city girl, to quote the old ladies, but the work ethic and priorities of a Litchton woman. She likes her men, she likes her job, but she loves a nice lay-in.
“Besides,” Honey tells the women, hesitating with a coy smile before dropping the bomb of information: “I’ve already met those men.”
The effect is instantaneous. All of them drop their knitting onto their laps and gasp. Gillian clutches at her chest, always the most dramatic of the quintet.
“My darling,” Rosalind marvels.
“Well?” Scarlett questions. “How? When? Tell us everything.”
Honey moves from behind the counter to an empty seat at their table. She sits next to Sacha, the woman taking her hand and holding it tightly.
“You ladies seem to forget that I go to the fruit stand outside the store on Monday evenings,” Honey begins. “Which is where I ran into them. Literally, too– one of them had his nose buried in his phone and bumped into me. He could’ve knocked me over!”
“You should have fallen so that he could have helped you up,” Rosalind suggests. The women murmur in agreement.
Honey rolls her eyes. “I did not. He apologized, I told him that he only bumped into me because he was caught up in his phone, and he said he would be more careful next time.”
“Next time,” Gillian repeats, nodding. “So he wishes to see you again?”
“Turns out, ‘next time’ was about five minutes later, when I went to leave the stand and he was right behind me!” Honey reveals, purposefully lacing incredulity into her voice. She places a finger on her lips and widens her eyes, playing into the dramatics of the ladies as if to say “What do you think of that?”
The women gasp in time.
“Which one was it?” Scarlett asks.
“I only saw the other two for a moment, so I don’t think I could describe them well enough to you,” Honey says. “The one I spoke to is named Trevor.” She pauses to roll her eyes before adding sarcastically, “But his friends call him Z.”
Scarlett and Rosalind nod and look to each other.
“It must have been the one who left earlier than the other two,” Scarlett says. “With those awful tattoos.”
Honey bites back a giggle. Once a southern mother, always a southern mother. “He did have tattoos,” she confirms.
“You two would get along,” Vera suggests, not so subtly casting a glance at the leafy vines that crawl up Honey’s arm.
Honey goes quiet, glaring at Vera. She has worked to try and get the ladies to stop commenting on her body and habits over the past few years, but the ladies are stubborn and traditional in most senses.
“How long will they be here? Or were they just stopping through?” Gillian asks.
“They’ll be here all summer, so I’m sure we’ll get our fill of them.” With that, Honey effectively ends her role in the conversation. She returns to the counter and opens her book, pretending to read it.
She knew the ladies would have caught wind of the men’s arrival by now and would want to discuss it. She knew that the ladies would be interested in setting her up with one of these new arrivals. They were cute, she’d give them that. At a glance, any of the three could have been nice company at a brewery, but Honey wasn’t looking. She was perfectly content with finding herself and making her own life, even if it meant that she wasn’t finding a husband like most women in Litchton wanted her to do.
The other thing was this: Trevor hadn’t made the best first impression. He bumped into her, then startled her, then told her some story about business partners or colleagues that definitely was not true, and he was from California. He’s a yuppie, a hipster who probably enjoys the bustle of Los Angeles and can’t handle the slow, satisfying life of a small town. To her estimate, Trevor has got a week before he leaves Litchton for something more glamorous and fast-paced.
The ladies relay the news to Bea when she finally shows up for her shift, a travel mug of coffee in hand from which she sips throughout each tantalizing detail of Scarlett’s retelling. Upon Honey’s information, Bea’s eyes flicker knowingly toward the counter and Honey just shrugs. Bea’s eyes then narrow, accompanying a questioning tilt of her head. Honey shakes her head at that, and Bea lets it go.
“Well, I heard the reason that Mr. Mayes wasn’t at church last week wasn’t his hip acting up,” Bea says to the ladies when it’s her turn. That starts a whole new tangent for the knitting club, one that will keep them occupied and in their seats for a number of minutes. It gives Honey the time to slip into the back and cut up one of the peaches that she brought from home to snack on during work.
The ladies leave The Reading Nook about an hour after Bea’s arrival, leaving the store empty except for the two girls and floaters looking for their next novel.
Bea leans against the counter with a smug smile, blinking innocently at Honey.
“What do you really think about them?” She asks.
“I think they’re trouble,” Honey says. “They didn’t seem on the same page about their jobs, they don’t know anything about living in a small town, they travel a lot, and I think I saw one of them carrying a 48-pack of beer.”
“Are they cute?”
Honey fixes Bea with a stare that could put a stop to anyone else’s questions. Unfortunately, Bea is immune to Honey’s intimidation tactics and her sarcastic jabs. She sees right through them. Honey’s silence is another thing she sees through.
“Interesting.” She draws herself up to her full height.
“I think you would find them cute,” Honey says.
Bea hums. “You can’t backtrack now. You said enough without saying anything at all.” She crosses her arms over her chest then leans back down onto the counter. “So, tell me, Honeybear,” she muses. Fortunately, she changes the topic. “Did you get my strawberries from the stand, or were you too enthralled by the pretty boy in front of you?”
“He wasn’t pretty.”
“Sure he wasn’t.”
Honey scoffs, then leaves to the back to grab the basket of strawberries. She does so carefully, not touching the strawberries in case she breaks out in hives like she did last time. Bea swears that more exposure to the fruit would “cure” her allergy, but Honey only picks up the baskets to humor her. Honey doesn’t think she’s missing out on much, being allergic to strawberries. It’s her peaches that she would miss, and the blackberry pie that Ada makes when her vines turn ripe. That’s something to look forward to– blackberry season is starting and Ada could show up with a pie any day now.
The day continues slowly, with Ada making an appearance to close down the shop with the girls and help unpack a new shipment of books. After they’re done, Honey and Bea head to their respective homes.
Honey curls up with her book in her bed and listens to some music before the soft noise of the background and the comfort of her blanket draws her to her sleep.
3:90 – TREVOR
They have to go to the hardware store today.
Yesterday, the boys wasted the day, sleeping later than they have in weeks. They ate a late breakfast, which turned into their lunch. They played pool on the pool table, ping and beer pong on the foldable table, and sunbathed out on the porch. Cole watched lazily as Trevor and Jack tried to outline half of a rink in chalk on the cement slab. They never finished the other half of the rink.
Today, they have to go get some wood and tools to make the rink into a 3D structure so the pucks don’t go flying into the woods when they shoot them. Trevor and Cole are the ones who are supposed to go to the store– Jack has decided to stay behind and wait for Quinn and Luke if they show up while the other boys are at the store.
A convenient excuse, even though the goons are planning to show up today. Trevor expects the brothers to try and weasel their way out of working on the rink, claiming that they’re too tired from travel or they need more time to unpack. The thing is, the boys are flying into Charlotte and renting a car for the summer so that there will be two at the house, so they’re only driving for like an hour compared to Trevor’s eleven. They have no right to be complaining, but they will likely enact a vote and outweigh Cole and Trevor because if the Hughes are anything, it’s lazy and loyal to each others’ laziness.
They’re very driven, but only when they choose to work. When it comes to hockey, they’ll work all day. When it comes to creating the hockey rink or putting together equipment, they would much rather watch. Jim spoiled them that way– he was always the builder of the family and the boys were left to go do whatever they wanted as long as they weren’t annoying their father.
Trevor and Cole put off the trip as long as they can, hoping that maybe the Hughes brothers will show up early and they can force them to go to the store before they can even get out of the car.
When the clock hits two, Trevor decides that the waiting is useless. They could’ve done so much during the day instead of sitting around waiting, but no. He was lucky enough to sit around and do nothing all day and watch stupid daytime TV with Cole while Jack read his texts with his brothers out loud.
The hardware store would be heaven compared to this.
He leaves without Cole at first, driving slowly down the driveway until he sees Cole’s figure run out of the house and after the car. Trevor can imagine what he’s saying as he yells after the vehicle– something about not being left with Jack in case the other Hugheses show up, something about how Trevor is a dick.
They follow the one road on the mountain up to the strip where all the stores are. The hardware store is just a few doors down from the grocery store, so they park in the same parking lot.
Cole and Trevor walk side by side, Cole’s eyes on his phone as they walk while Trevor takes in the brick walkway beneath them. Names are etched on some of the bricks– Jude Doyle, Frederick Lawson, Ansley Hood… Grandma. Trevor has seen stuff like this before, but there’s something different about these names being etched on the bricks of this small town. Everyone probably knew these people, or knew someone who knew them, when they died. It’s so personal.
When they reach the hardware store, Trevor holds the door open for a man leaving. They give each other a curt nod, just a passing glance. Trevor sees absolutely no recognition in his eyes and comments on it. Cole doesn’t care, and says so. Trevor punches his shoulder.
“Welcome in,” the elderly woman at the counter greets. “What are you boys looking for?”
“Hi,” Cole replies, a charming smile on his face. “Could you point me towards the power tools? I can find my way from there.”
The woman smiles and points toward the back of the store. “They’re on the left, sweetie.” She turns to Trevor. “And what about you?”
“We’ll be needing some plywood,” Trevor says. “We’re building a little roller rink.”
“Oh, how fun!” The lady, named Vera if her nametag has any truth to it, claps her hands. “How much do you need, dear?”
“How much have you got?” Trevor asks.
Vera waves her hand. “I don’t know. I’ll call Earl, he’ll send you off with what you need.” She turns and takes a breath before shouting the man’s name. Trevor’s heard that shout before– his grandmother used to do the same thing with his grandfather.
The balding, age-spotted man appears at the door to the back of the shop. “I done told ya I have my hearing aids in, woman,” Earl grumbles to his wife, fond and mean and familiar in the way that only a couple who has been married for fifty years can be.
Vera smacks Earl’s arm as he ambles by her. Earl pulls his arm away and puts another foot between them.
“What do you need, young man?” Earl asks.
“Lots of wood,” Trevor says. “A couple of sheets of plywood and some 2x4s, maybe?”
“Boy, you do not think I have all’a that laying around.” Earl fixes Trevor with a stink-eye.
“Don’t you tell him that!” Vera chimes in. “I know you’ve got plenty of wood out back because you bought all of it and never finished our damn basement.”
“I’m going to finish it!”
“Earl, you’ve been saying that for thirty years, you ain’t never finishing the basement.”
Trevor wants to laugh at the absurdity of this conversation. He wants to laugh at this domestic argument and how unreal it is that it’s unfolding in front of him. Instead, he clears his throat. “Excuse me,” he interrupts gently. “I don’t know if I want thirty year old wood for this. We’ll be hitting pucks off the boards all day and I’d like to keep the pucks inside the rink, please.”
“You’re a hockey boy?” Earl questions with a raised brow. When Trevor nods, he lets out a grunt. Trevor can’t tell what that means. Nonetheless, he waves Trevor to follow him into the back.
Trevor squeezes past Vera– she pinches his butt, he thinks– and catches a glimpse of her knitting under the counter when he walks by. She’s knitting something green. It’s too bundled up for him to tell what it is, though. Maybe he’ll ask later.
When he enters the back room, Earl gestures around. “Take your pick of the wood and make a pile over there–” he points to the corner– “and you can drive around back and we can put the wood in your truck there.”
“Oh, I didn’t drive a truck down,” Trevor says before he can help it. Earl makes a face. “But my friend and I can carry the piles ourselves to the car, don’t worry about that.”
“I wasn’t worried,” Earl gripes, shuffling away to sit at a bench with a circular saw and a half finished product on the table.
Trevor sifts through the wood, all neatly arranged into piles of similar sizes– but labeled completely wrong. Trevor thinks that Earl might’ve refused to follow Vera’s labels when she first put them up in the shop, but realized that they’re more helpful than harmful. He’s just petty enough of an old man to ignore the labels, but follow the categorization.
Trevor ends up with a pile of ten sheets of plywood– four that are as long as lunch tables, and six that are just squares. Those will go behind the goals, while the long ones will go around the sides of the slab. He picks up a couple of 2x4s, just in case he needs them, and throws them on the pile with a clatter.
“I’m going to go grab my buddy,” Trevor says to Earl.
Earl grunts, but doesn’t budge. He also doesn’t look up from his station.
Cole is chatting up Vera when Trevor rejoins them. He’s leaning over the edge of the counter, asking about Vera’s knitting and her grandchildren. He’s got a bag of goodies next to him– powertools and nails, Trevor assumes.
“Coley, come help me,” Trevor interrupts.
“No manners, this guy,” Cole says to Vera, scoffing and pointing his thumb at Trevor with a shake of his head.
“Well, don’t keep the bear waiting,” Vera replies. Trevor watches her pinch Cole’s ass as he passes, but Cole just laughs and bats her hand away.
Fucking annoying. Always so good with the grandparents.
“The bear?” Trevor asks once Vera is out of earshot. “Is that me?”
Cole smirks. “We’ve got nicknames.”
Earl looks up when they reenter the back. He lets out a laugh, just a short bark. “This is your friend who’s going to help you carry all that wood?”
As the smirk falls off Cole’s face, Trevor picks it up.
“I can carry some wood,” Cole insists. “Probably all of it. I’m stronger than Z is, anyway.”
Earl’s gaze slides over to Trevor. “Z,” he repeats. “I hope you don’t stick with that one.”
Trevor laughs. “You sound like–” he cuts himself off. He never did learn her name, anyway. What’s it to this old man, who he sounds like?
Cole picks up on it though. “Like who, Z?” He asks with a tilt of his head.
Trevor glares at him.
“I don’t give a rat’s ass who I sound like and I don’t want to hear your smug little bickering,” Earl admonishes. “Get your wood and get outta my shop.”
Trevor laughs in Cole’s face, then pushes him over towards the pile of wood. “Go on, strong man.”
Cole makes like he’s going to throw a punch at Trevor– Trevor doesn’t flinch, because he hasn’t fallen for that since their first stint on the US team– and puffs up his chest before deciding to pick up the long pieces of wood.
“Compensating for something?” Trevor asks.
“Go fuck yourself,” Cole replies cheerfully, turning on his heel and swinging the wood around with him, hoping to hit Trevor in the stomach. Trevor jumps away.
He picks up the rest of the wood and follows Cole out of the shop, bidding Earl a quiet farewell.
Earl grunts.
Trevor nods to himself, not surprised by the response. Vera is much more sad to see them go, gushing over how strong they are and telling them to come back soon.
“What’s your nickname?” Trevor asks suddenly, as they load the wood into the back of the car.
Cole grins, crooked and smug. “Sweetie.”
“You’re fucking with me.”
“Oh, I assure you, I’m not. I’m a real hit with the ladies.”
“Yeah, you’re a real fucking hit with the married seventy year olds,” Trevor scoffs. “Don’t fucking talk to me, dude.”
Cole laughs, tossing his head back. He looks over Trevor’s shoulder. “Hey, isn’t that your girl?”
Trevor spins around. “Where?” He asks, looking to his left and right.
When Cole starts cackling behind him, Trevor takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. “I’m gonna fucking kill you, dude.”
“Bear, you wouldn’t know what to do without me.” Cole pats Trevor on the chest before rounding the car, settling in the passenger seat.
“Fucking passenger princess,” Trevor seethes.
“You wish you were me.”
“I fucking don’t.”
“The more fucks you say, the more fucks you give.”
“Fuck off.”
They drive back to the house in silence, Trevor’s knuckles white as he deliberates driving off the mountain and taking Cole with him. There are pros, certainly, the top one being that Cole would no longer be part of this vacation. The cons, unfortunately, outweigh the pros: without Cole, Trevor would be alone with the Hughes brothers all summer, except for the occasional visiting savior.
Quinn and Luke have arrived by the time the duo returns to the mountain house. They brought with them another SUV, this one only slightly bigger than Trevor’s vehicle. It’s got a third row of seats, but it’s cramped– they’ll definitely have to take both cars down to Charlotte when they go to practice. Because of the limited trunk space in Quinn’s rental car, Trevor’s car will likely end up being the gear car.
Which is lucky, because who wouldn’t want to spend three hours total in the car with smelly gear while the other car gets to have fun and smell nice?
On second thought, the time alone might be good for Trevor. He loves his friends, he really does, but it’s hard to be around them for so long. He’s lucky that they’re all on different teams, that they keep up when they can, and that it’s not constant. Jack can’t escape his brothers, especially not Luke, but Trevor can escape all three of them.
He spends the evening building the outdoor rink, mostly alone. Quinn helps a little bit, mostly chalking up the lines on the remaining half of the slab. He holds the wood for Trevor while he screws some nails into the pieces to keep them in place. They work mostly in silence, as they often do. Trevor is itching to talk with Quinn, see how he is, but he knows that Quinn is a man of few words. He also knows that Quinn is quick to say that Trevor talks too much. They’re at the point in their relationship where Trevor lets Quinn dictate how much they speak.
Luke tries to cook dinner, he does. Trevor can’t fault him for trying. Jack had to jump in to save them from burnt steaks and soggy vegetables, and even if he can’t salvage everything, he does a pretty good job. Luke apologizes and does the dishes. He’s quiet for the rest of the night, falling asleep on the couch during the movie they picked out, and Quinn wakes Luke like a good big brother and shoos him to bed.
It’s more calm than the lake house, Trevor thinks. They’re not really doing anything differently, are they? And yet, here they are, sitting together in calm silence. They’re drinking bottled beer and laughing over the same jokes they’ve heard a million times, reminiscing about summers past and what they’ll do this summer. Quinn wishes for a lake. Jack tells him they’ll find one.
Trevor goes to bed when the movie ends, frogs croaking past his bedroom window in the depths of the night.
4:90 – HONEY
It’s a Thursday, so Honey gets to sleep in until nine. Sleeping in until nine means that she really wakes up at eight, because she just can’t sleep in late after working at the bookstore for five years now. She sits on her couch on Thursday mornings and reads. She does the crossword in the Litchton Local, the newspaper that comes out weekly on Wednesdays.
There’s an immeasurable stillness in the mountains.
Honey noticed it the first time she came up to this house as a child. Everything moves, like the bugs outside and the leaves on the trees, but everything is so still. Like it’s being held in place by something bigger. She knows the feeling well, but it’s comforting here.
At home, it was uniforms and piano lessons after school. She loves piano, even still, but there was something so crushing about the weight of her perfect posture on that bench when there was all the pressure of beauty breathing down her neck.
Home, Honey thinks again, and laughs.
In the mountains, all of the beauty of the world is there and present and taking up space– but it’s not forced. It’s not the idealized version of everything. It just is.
And everything is so green, especially on a rainy day like this. Honey thinks there’s something sacred about the greenness of the mountains, but it’s the melancholic side of divine that leaves you waiting for another whisper or breath in the wind that never comes.
She used to have a piano that she could play in the mornings. She toted it to the antique store down the road when she made the mountain home hers. Sometimes, she wonders why she did that and regrets it, staring at the dents on the floor where its legs used to stand.
But then she remembers that she’s thinking about the past again and she shakes herself out of it. Five years later, but it’s hard to forget all of the things you grew up knowing.
Honey picks Bea up on the way to work, relishing in the girl’s consistent lateness because it allows her the chance to catch up with her friend. They see each other every day, yes, but the bookstore isn’t suited for some topics.
Such as Bea’s current woes:
“I’ve run out of dating app men,” she complains.
Honey bites back a smile. “Did you run out, or did you just swipe left on all of them?” She asks knowingly.
Bea cuts her eyes at Honey. “All the ones I swiped left on are ugly,” she says. “I can promise you that.”
“Is anyone good-looking in Litchton, Bea?”
Bea’s silence speaks for itself.
Honey laughs, her hair whipping around her face in the breeze from the rolled-down windows of her car.
“If I had known you were dragging me to the Ugly Capital of the World, I wouldn’t have come with you,” Bea announces, like it matters. She’s a liar. She wouldn’t have let Honey leave their hometown without her, no matter where she was going.
“You couldn’t turn it down, you had to come,” Honey replies. “Especially since they asked you to be Mayor.”
Bea gasps, affronted. She stares at Honey, her jaw hanging open. “Are you mad at me? Be honest.” She pouts, her voice whiny.
“Oh my God,” Honey groans, rolling her eyes. “No, I’m not mad at you.”
“Okay, well, stop being a cunt, please,” Bea sasses. If Honey were more annoyed, she’d reach out and slap Bea’s arm for the attitude. “We have to go to work and I need to put all my focus into pretending to like you.”
“Yeah, because it’s so hard to like me,” Honey says. Her voice is dripping with sarcasm, monotone and grating.
“Yeah, it is, you suck.” Bea flips her hair over her shoulder, digging through her bag to find her Walmart lip gloss. She smears the cherry flavored gloss over her lips and puckers up, batting her eyelashes at Honey exaggeratedly. “Gimme a kiss.”
“No.” Honey pulls up to The Reading Nook and parks on the street in front of the building, parallel parking with the practiced ease of someone who’s been dealing with nothing but parallel parking (except in the grocery store and church parking lots) for the last five years.
“Ugh, one day you’ll kiss me,” Bea mutters, staring forlornly out the window.
Honey rolls her eyes. “Bea, we’ve already kissed. You weren’t that good and I didn’t like your lip gloss then, either.”
Bea cringes. “That was like ten years ago, Hon. Things have changed since then. Number one, I’m not in middle school. Number two, I’ve had boyfriends and I’ve had sex since then. Number three, you know it wouldn’t mean anything. I want you to try my lip gloss so bad, come on.”
Honey stares. Bea’s got a stupid smile on her face, teasing and annoying. They hold each other’s eyes for too long before Honey speaks.
“You’re insufferable, did you know that?”
Bea nods. “You are so easy to work up.”
Bea and Honey exit the car at the same time and enter the store through the front, the bell jingling behind them. Ada greets them from behind the counter, teasing Bea for being late again and threatening to cut her pay. She never will, never. Bea is too good with the kids, too happy to talk to mothers, and just dry enough to understand the miserly old man that walks through the door looking for a new World War I book.
In the back, Ada has a bowl of biscuits and jam that Honey reheats and eats over the counter before she starts her day.
She’s supposed to reshelve some books from their Borrow Before You Buy section, the part of the store that acts as the town’s public library. It’s a small task. The pile of books that were returned yesterday is less than a hundred. A good portion of the books are little kid chapter books, the kind you could finish in an hour as an adult because the font is so big and there are full-page pictures twice a chapter.
Bea has to read to the kids at noon– some of the mothers bring snacks, like the end of a youth soccer game. It’s like a potluck lunch and the kids love Bea. Most weeks, it’s just her, but since it’s summer, she’s starting to bring in guest readers. Honey refuses to do it every time. Well, that’s not true– she acts as guest reader once a summer, right before school starts. It’s her one moment of the year.
As she’s restocking the books, Honey hears the bell twinkle with each new customer that walks in. She’s grown used to the noise over the years, so it doesn’t draw her eye anymore.
What does draw her eye, however, is the blunt tap on her shoulder. When she turns around, Bea is blinking innocently at her– no doubt the offending hand in this scenario– with Trevor by her side.
“I was just talking to Trevor here, Honey,” Bea says. “And he was wondering if we had any books that a man his age might like. I thought maybe you should talk to him.”
Honey glares at Bea, purposefully obvious about it so that Trevor sees. What does she know about book recommendations for a man in his twenties? He probably wants some shit sports biography, or worse– he’s embracing his inner old man and he’s ready to venture into the world of World War I non-fiction. Either way, book recommendations are Bea’s thing, not Honey’s. She just stocks the books, builds the shelves, and bonds with the old ladies who come in on Tuesdays.
Bea shrugs with a coy little smile– Honey wishes she could slap it off of her face– and disappears behind the stacks. Honey can tell that she’s still listening from a few feet away, always nosy and overly interested in Honey’s exploits. If she can’t indulge in her own, she’s happy to butt in on Honey’s.
“Trevor,” Honey says, crossing her arms over her chest. She didn’t wear a bra today. She doesn’t trust him not to look. She also doesn’t trust her nipples not to peak in the cold air.
“Is Honey your real name?” Trevor asks.
She balks at him. “What is it with you and my name?”
Honey expects Trevor to back down, to act timid and normal and earnest like he did at the fruit stand on Monday. She expects him to apologize, yet again, for another inadvertent mistake that Trevor seemed unable to avoid. It’s because he doesn’t think– he just says the words as they come to mind, hoping that the sentence comes out fully formed and making sense.
And yet, he doesn’t.
“Just wanted to know what name I’ll be saying when I’m telling you to come,” is what Trevor answers.
Honey gathers her wit quickly, scrambling to find a response to Trevor’s bold statement. She wants something clever, something to turn him down, something to tell him that he’s a cocky prick for saying such a thing while she’s at work, but she comes up with none of the above. Instead, she settles for: “It’s a nickname.”
A smirk tugs at Trevor’s lips and Honey wants to reach out and strangle him. He’s smirking because he thinks he bested her– bested her– and that he’s got the upper hand.
“What kind of book are you looking for, Trevor?” Honey changes the subject, trying to get back on task. She turns, continues restocking the Borrow Before You Buy shelves.
“I’m not sure, Honey,” he replies, really milking his use of her name. “What kind of books do you think I’d like?”
She glances at him, looks him up and down. She tamps down a smile and says in a curt, monotone voice. “Guides on how to make the best of your business trip.”
Trevor laughs at that, more of a shake of his shoulders than a real laugh. “You’re funny, Honey.”
Honey raises her eyebrows and waits for him to continue.
“Hey, that rhymed. Maybe a book of poetry? I need to study my craft if I’m going to be waxing poems about you.”
He’s bold, she thinks. He’s really bold, much more sure of himself than he was on Monday. He’s much more confident, a sharp 180º from where he was the other day.
“Why don’t you keep your waxes to yourself?” Honey asks.
“How can I?”
She turns to him, planting a hand on her hip. “Don’t you have something to do today other than bother me at my bookstore? You don’t even know me. Why are you here?”
“I’m here to get a book. I’m not trying to bother you, I’m just trying to make conversation.” Trevor shoves his hands in his pockets and has the decency to look ashamed, even if it’s just for a split second and just to see if Honey will crumble. She knows his type. She’s seen them before.
“You’re flirting with me,” Honey accuses. “Not making conversation.” She puts air quotes around the last two words.
Trevor smiles. “You caught me,” he says simply, no shame evident in his voice. The smile stays on his lips as he and Honey look at each other. He raises his eyebrows and she takes it as a challenge.
“I’m not interested, Trevor.”
“I could show you a good time, Honey.”
“In Litchton?”
“Don’t you hear how good it sounds when I say your name? It’s like we’ve been hooking up for ages and I’ve got a special little name for you.”
“A name that everyone else uses.”
“It’s special to me.”
“How about a self-help book?”
Trevor clutches at his chest, jaw dropping in fake-misery. “You think I need help?”
“If you’re not going to buy a book, then you need to leave me alone.” Honey places the last book in her stack on the shelf and looks at Trevor expectantly. The silence sits between them, suspended for a moment.
“Do you have any books about space?” He asks.
Honey notices that his voice is softer, a little more genuine. She examines his features, waiting for the other shoe to drop. She waits for the joke about not wanting space from her, needing her in his orbit, or whatever. It doesn’t come. She scans his figure one last time, realizing that her brow is furrowed and she’s chewing on the inside of her bottom lip as she does so. She smoothens her expression, hoping Trevor didn’t pick up on her calculating stare.
“How do you feel about creative nonfiction?” Honey asks.
Trevor scrunches his nose.
“Memoirs, personal histories, stuff like that,” Honey supplies. She softens her voice to match his tone. She almost feels a little shy. “We only have one book about space that I’ve read and it’s creative nonfiction, but it’s really good.” Quieter, then: “I liked it.”
Trevor nods, a little hesitant. This is the Trevor she met on Monday. “Okay.”
“Follow me.” Honey leads him to the nonfiction section, to the rows of books whose authors bear a last name that starts with ‘D.’ She runs her fingers along the titles of the books at the height of her chest while scanning the upper shelves. “It’s there,” she says, pointing to the row just out of her reach. “It’s by ‘Dean.’” She looks down, around her on the floor. “Where’s my step ladder…?”
“I can reach it,” Trevor says, stepping forward. He places a hand on the small of Honey’s back and reaches up, fingers hesitating as he searches for the right book. When he finds the spine bearing Dean’s name, he bounces up on his tiptoes for just a second to slide the book from its position on the shelf.
Honey has never been more aware of a hand in her life. His touch is light, just a passing glance really, but it weighs on her. It’s like she’s standing in quicksand and she waited too long to try and get out.
He’s so close to her when he stands flat on his feet again. He’s got the book in one hand and his other still rests on Honey’s back.
She steps away.
His eyes follow her, but instead of saying anything, he just flips the book over in his hand. He reads the back cover and as he does so, Honey puts more space between them. She takes a breath, trying to stay quiet, and grounds herself.
“Is it really any good?” Trevor asks. “Do I have to buy it?”
“Yes, and, um.” Honey throws a look over her shoulder. She lost track of Bea while she and Trevor went to find this book. Fuck, her nosey best friend could be anywhere. “You can borrow it. We just usually give people a week or so to bring it back, and if you don’t, we track you down.”
“Track me down?” Trevor asks, chuckling.
“Yeah.” Honey nods. “Small town. Everybody knows everybody, or knows somebody who knows everybody.”
“Stalking me, Honey?” Trevor teases.
“We’ve met twice, and both times it was because you came up to me. If anyone is the stalker here, it’s you.”
Trevor turns the book over in his hand again, looking down to avoid Honey’s gaze. “Leaving Orbit, huh?” He bites his lip and takes in the sight of Honey in front of him. He taps the book with his other hand. “I’ll let you know if it’s any good.”
“I know it’s good. I read it.”
“Baby, if you knew good, you’d be all over me.”
Honey scoffs. “Alright, fun’s over. Get out of here, Trevor.” She shoos him away, practically pushing him out of the shop. She sticks her tongue out at him through the glass after closing the door behind him. She watches him laugh, run his hands through his hair, and turn away.
‘Zegras’ is written in bold letters across his back, the number 11 in the center of his t-shirt. The detail catches Honey’s eye as she watches him walk away, down the street towards a car with a New York license plate that looks far too perfect and expensive to belong in Litchton. She bites the inside of her lip again, pondering. If anyone asks, she doesn’t care, but Trevor’s different than anyone she’s ever met. She wonders why.
But no, she doesn’t care.
Bea does.
“He plays hockey,” Bea announces, revealing herself. “He’s good, too. NHL. He was a top ten pick when he was drafted.”
Honey just nods. Twice. That’s all she needs. They’re small movements and she’s still chewing on her lip.
“What did he get?”
Honey clears her throat. “Just the, uh, Dean book about space.”
Honey can practically hear the face Bea makes behind her back. “You think he’ll enjoy that?” Bea asks. “It’s really personal.”
“It was the only book I could think of,” Honey replies with a shrug. She finally turns around to face Bea. “You’ve got to stop spying on me. I know you listened to our whole conversation.”
Bea pouts and stomps her foot, the sound echoing along the stacks around them. “How could I not?” She demands. “‘Just wanted to know what name I’ll be saying when I’m telling you to come?’ Honey, girl. Be serious.”
“Bea, you know I’m not looking for that right now.”
“You’re never fucking looking for that,” Bea hisses, pinching Honey’s wrist until she flinches away. “It’s falling into your lap and you’re pushing it out the door! What’s wrong with you?”
Honey glares at her with a tilted head.
Bea relents. “One of these days, I’m going to kick your ass,” she threatens. “You can’t be a spinstery old maid forever, Honeybear. They’re only here for the summer. Maybe you should embrace it.”
“He’ll be gone within the week.”
Bea sighs. “Whatever you say.”
5:90 – TREVOR
“We need to throw a party,” Trevor says over breakfast.
“Why?” Luke asks, voice scratchy from lack of use. He yawns and runs his fingers through his hair, further messing up his already messy curls. He’s not wearing a shirt– none of them are– and Trevor is astounded by how pale Luke is.
“We need to get you outside more,” Trevor mumbles, then clears his throat and continues speaking. “It’s like a housewarming thing.”
Unimpressed, Cole rolls his eyes. “Who do you want to invite?” He asks.
Trevor pauses, side-eying his friend. “Nobody,” he deflects.
Quinn snorts, the spoon he’s using for his cereal clinking against the side of his bowl. “Not much of a party.”
“He wants to invite the girl that he met the other day,” Jack says, butting into the conversation.
Luke frowns. “What girl?”
“Some townie that he met at the fruit stand when we went to the grocery store,” Jack explains. “He doesn’t know her name.”
“Her name is Honey, actually,” Trevor interrupts.
The table stills. Each of the boys’ eyes turn towards Trevor and he suddenly feels like an ant under a child’s magnifying glass, boiling under the glare.
Cole pushes up an invisible pair of glasses and raises a finger, pursing his lips. “Actually,” he mocks, then drops the tone. “How do you know her name, Z?”
Trevor shrugs noncommittally. “I ran into her when I went into town yesterday.”
“Oh, when you were supposed to pick up laundry detergent and you came back with a book instead?” Cole asks. “That makes sense, much more sense than what Luke said.”
Trevor blanches. “What did Luke say?”
Jack snickers.
Trevor turns to Luke. “What did you say?”
Quinn smiles and hides his face, taking a large mouthful of his cereal to leave Luke hanging if he asked for help.
Luke flushes. “I mean, you know… that maybe you confused the two.”
“How the fuck would I confuse laundry detergent with a book?” Trevor snaps. “They’re two completely different things, fuckface.”
Luke throws his hands up in surrender. “We were just thinking of reasons why you might’ve come back without the one thing we needed.”
Trevor looks around the table. “You guys are such assholes.”
“Bro, you’re the one that forgot laundry detergent because you were too busy chatting up some chick,” Jack defends the group. “Now we can’t even do our laundry.”
“If it’s so fucking important to you, go get the detergent yourself!”
A smile breaks out on Jack’s face. “Maybe I will,” he says, his voice shit-eating. “I might need to grab a book for myself, too.”
Trevor’s anger increases tenfold, for no fucking reason. “The fuck you do,” he snaps. “You don’t even know how to read.”
Jack’s face twists, his emotions finally aligning with Trevor’s own. “Fuck you, dude. You know I can read, I just don’t like to.”
Trevor scoffs and rolls his eyes. “I just want to have a party,” he mutters, stabbing at his eggs with his fork.
The boys fall into silence, finishing their breakfasts. Trevor pouts, frustrated that the boys weren’t immediately on board with his idea for a party.
If they were in Michigan, the Hughes brothers would have the front door of the house unlocked past 10pm. The people they know from the golf course, from the lake, from the pickleball courts would all be pouring through the doorway and into the party. Everyone knows that on Saturday nights, the Hughes brothers invite people over and they have a big bonfire. Apparently, that only applies in Michigan.
Trevor leaves the breakfast table first, to jeers from the other boys about being pouty and bitchy for not getting his way. Trevor knows that he’s going to invite Honey and her friend– Bee? Bea? B?– over tomorrow night no matter what the goons say. There’s not much to do in Litchton, he knows that, so he doesn’t want to leave the girls out. Otherwise, they might just sit at home all night. Trevor can’t have that.
Obviously, that’s his only motive. He would never have any other reason to invite Honey and Bea over to the house at night. Never.
Maybe one other reason.
But that’s irrelevant.
He spends the morning outside, using the extra wood from Earl to build a fire pit in the half-circle clearing near the edge of the forest. When they were younger, Trevor’s sister might’ve thought this area was where the fairies lived, and maybe she would have built them a house. He wonders briefly if Honey was the same way when she was a child, when she was growing up in rural Litchton with nothing else to do but imagine.
Come to think of it, he doesn’t know if Honey grew up here. She seems so intimately integrated into the town that she has to be from here, has to have grown up here. She must know all the town secrets and all the town gossip and fuck, Trevor wants to know all of that and more.
He can’t explain the feeling he has about Honey. He’s just… drawn to her. It doesn’t make sense– he doesn’t know her. He’s barely met her. She did not exist in his life a week ago and yet, she’s popping up in his thoughts like they’ve known each other for years. Like they’ve been inseparable for years. When he thinks about it, he decides that Honey is like one of the girls he would have met in elementary school in Bedford. Honey is one of the girls that he would have grown up with, one of the neighbor girls from down the street with whom he rode his bike on hot summer days.
She’s got a hometown charm feel to her. Trevor has to see her again.
He finishes building the wooden part of the fire pit before realizing how stupid it was to build the pit out of wood. A lightbulb seems to go off in his head, though, because it’s an excuse to go see her, to invite her to his party. He can go to the hardware store on the way, pick up some stone and gravel to line the wood, protect it from catching flame. He can pick up some firewood from the grocery store for their first fire and pick up the laundry detergent he forgot yesterday. Jack won’t be so annoying then.
Trevor doesn’t bother telling the boys where he’s going– he just gets in the car and drives away.
It takes all of fifteen minutes to make his way to the bookstore. It’s still early, so he doesn’t even know if it’s open yet. Trevor and the boys are so used to waking up early for hockey that they’ve been up for about two hours and the whole day is still ahead of them.
When Trevor pulls at the front door of The Reading Nook, it doesn’t swing open the way it did yesterday. He knows the doors are easy on their hinges, considering how easily Honey slammed the door behind him yesterday, but today, the wood is barely budging. He knocks on the door, loud.
Honey’s friend’s head peeks out from behind a stack, confusion written all over her expression. Trevor waves at her, gesturing at the door. She laughs, then approaches the door. She points down at the ‘Closed’ sign hanging near the handle.
Trevor tilts his head, unimpressed. “I have to talk to you,” he says through the glass.
Bea unlocks the door and opens it with a snorted laugh. “What’s up, Trevor? Honey’s not here yet.”
“I have a proposition for you.”
Bea steps aside and lets him into the store. “You want her.”
Trevor sputters at her honesty. “I don’t know her.”
“You want her,” Bea repeats with a nod and a knowing smile. “And you want to know how to get her.”
“Well, yes,” Trevor says. “But also, no. I wanted to invite you– both, you both– to a party tomorrow night.”
Bea smiles. She crosses her arms over her chest. “You want my best friend and all I get is some measly party? Come on, Trevor. What’s in it for me?”
Trevor thinks for a minute. “What do you want?”
Bea laughs. She pokes her tongue into her cheek and looks expectantly at Trevor.
“Whoa,” Trevor says, taking a step back. “That’s really… forward, but–”
“I don’t want you, Trevor,” Bea scoffs. She shakes her head and rolls her eyes. “So self-centered, Honey was right about that. But, I’ll help you get her and I’ll make sure we make it to your party if you give me what I do want.”
Trevor hums, narrowing his eyes. “What do you want?”
Bea smiles, devilish and conniving. “The dating pool up here is pretty dry, and I hear you’ve got a few friends.”
Trevor nods.
Bea blinks at him. “Do you have any pictures of these friends? I would’ve looked you up, but Honey and I swore off Instagram years ago.”
That makes sense. That’s why he couldn’t find Honey when he looked her up last night– not that he had much to go off of. Still, “Honey Litchton NC” didn’t reveal many results.
Trevor fumbles with his phone, showing her a picture of the group from last summer. He watches her fingers pinch and zoom in on the picture, on each individual. She keeps her expression neutral, a poker face that impresses Trevor. She hums, thoughts racing behind her eyes too quick for Trevor to understand them.
“We’ll come to your party,” Bea says simply, handing the phone back to Trevor. She snatches it back at the last second. “Wait,” she says, and clicks around for a second.
Trevor waits, then she hands the phone back. On the screen is a contact page for ‘Bea McLean.’
“It’s pronounced like McLane,” Bea tells Trevor. “Since you’re so obsessed with names.”
“Okay,” Trevor cuts her off with a sarcastic nod.
Bea laughs. “Don’t get sassy with me, I have all the power here.”
“Yeah, but I have your number,” Trevor flaunts.
“I could just block you, easily,” Bea points out. “Then where would you be?”
Wisely, Trevor bites his tongue. After a deep breath, he asks, “So, I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Wouldn’t miss it. Now get out, Honey’s supposed to get here soon and I don’t want her seeing you. She’s annoyingly on time. She’ll know we’re in cahoots.” Bea, much like her best friend did yesterday, pushes Trevor to the door and shoves him through it. She slams it behind him, flipping the sign so it says ‘Open’ instead, and waving Trevor off with a blown kiss.
she’s a flirt, Trevor thinks. those guys will not survive her for a second.
He doesn’t know which boy she has her eye on, but it doesn’t matter. Quinn’s too quiet for her, Luke is too awkward, Jack is too cocky, and Cole is too… short.
Trevor snorts at the insult, laughing to himself. He heads to the grocery store, where he parked, and purchases two gallon bottles of laundry detergent and a Sharpie. He writes “JACK” on one and puts them both in the trunk of the car. Then, he walks to the hardware store.
“Bear!” Vera greets from behind the counter, joints creaking as she moves from her chair behind the counter to give Trevor a hug.
“Oh, Vera, you don’t have to come all the way over here,” Trevor says awkwardly, but hugs the woman back nonetheless.
“Of course I did!” Vera exclaims. “You look so handsome, young man.”
Trevor blushes, shying away from Vera’s examining fingers. She squints at the logo on his chest, one of his shirts from Anaheim.
“I live in Anaheim,” Trevor explains to the woman, catching her hands in his and holding them securely in front of her body before letting go. “Do you have any stone that I could secure a fire pit with?”
“Yes, baby!” Vera claps and leads him to a section of the store that’s, somehow, even more peculiar than Earl’s workshop. There’s bags of gravel, sure, but it looks like fish food compared to some of the other bags and miscellaneous stones on the shelves. “Pick whatever you’d like. I’ll give you a discount for being so darn cute.”
Trevor chuckles. “I bet you give that to all your customers,” he teases.
“I had a local girl put it in the computer for me after we met you and Sweetie on Wednesday,” Vera teases back, batting her eyelashes. Her cheeks are red with blush, too much blush. “His discount is a little more because I see you’ve changed the body God gave you.”
Trevor follows her eyes to his tattoos. He rubs his opposite hand over them sheepishly. “Yes, ma’am.” He tries to smile charmingly. “Maybe I should’ve sent him to do the shopping today, since you like Sweetie so much.” He throws a wink into the mix to punctuate his sentence.
Vera laughs, a twinkling sound.
“Plus, it’d be cheaper for me,” Trevor says, like it’s a scandalous secret.
“I know that’s right!” Vera claps again, waves a hand at Trevor like she’s slapping her knee. She walks off, back to the counter, leaving Trevor to shop for his stones.
He shops through the stones for about half an hour, choosing his favorites. He settles on a midsize gray stone, one that he can stack and seal with cement. He buys the quick drying cement as well, and carries it all to his car. Vera carries the quick dry cement and giggles when Trevor easily shifts the stones in his grasp when she complains about the bucket being too heavy for an old lady. He picks up the bucket and shifts the stones again, knowing he can carry more than this if he needed to. He swears he hears Vera sigh dreamily behind him as he packs the car up.
Like he said, what’s flirting with a few old ladies?
When he bids her goodbye with a kiss on the cheek, Trevor makes eye contact with Honey in the bookstore window. He grins at her and winks to her for good measure. He thanks Vera for her help while he escorts her back to the store, just for the sake of Honey seeing how selfless he can be. He’s not self-centered, no matter what she told Bea.
Vera insists that Trevor and “his band of boys” join her and Earl at church that Sunday morning, pledging to introduce them to the other members of the community. Trevor agrees, thinking that being on Vera’s good side might get him even closer to Honey.
Trevor drives back to his home for the summer to find that the boys are playing in the rink he built.
Come to think of it, he’s making a lot of improvements to this property, and the only one who has actually helped is Quinn.
Not self-centered at all.
He deserves a party.
“We’re having a party,” Trevor calls out, carrying his stones toward the fire pit. He dumps his supplies on the ground. “And I invited two girls.” He wipes the dirt and dust from his fingers. “Someone else needs to finish this fire pit because I’m tired of building your shit. C’mon, Quinn.”
He leads the way inside, to grab a beer from the fridge, and Quinn follows after kicking off his skates, eager to avoid the work. The other brothers and Cole are left dumbfounded on the concrete. Jack makes eye contact with the cement mix first, and he smiles.
They always did love a little project, and maybe they can hide a drawing of a dick in the cement for the owners to find at the end of the summer.
6:90 – HONEY
“Where are we going?” Honey asks.
Bea has barely crossed over the threshold of Honey’s home before the question falls from her lips. Bea’s been cagey about it all day– just explaining that “we have plans” and that “you’ll enjoy them.” Honey loves her, sure, but this is absurd. She feels like she’s being kidnapped.
“More like when are we going,” Bea corrects. “Let’s get you an outfit.”
Honey stumbles back, Bea pushing her out of the way. She closes the door behind her friend, following Bea as she stomps up the stairs to Honey’s bedroom. Bea knows Honey’s place as well as she knows her own, a little townhouse off of the main street in town. Honey’s lucky to live a little farther from city center, closer to the magic of the mountains.
“What kind of plans do we have, at least?” Honey presses. She looks at Bea’s outfit– a jean skirt that falls like an old Poodle skirt and a white bandeau top. It’s sort of see-through– Honey can see the shadow and outline of Bea’s nipples through the skimpy top. “I don’t want to dress like you,” Honey says.
Bea scoffs and turns to Honey. “My plan tonight is to get laid, your plan tonight is to accompany me while I evaluate my prey.”
Honey pretends to gag. “I hate when you say that.”
“Maybe you’ll find someone to flirt with,” Bea says.
“So, where are we going tonight? Statesville? Winston?” Honey asks again, hoping Bea will relent since she now knows the purpose of their adventure.
“Dude, I’m not telling you,” Bea laughs.
She reaches Honey’s closet and throws the curtain open. She strolls into the closet, looking through Honey’s clothes.
“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” Honey asks, looking down at her athletic shorts and little tank top.
Bea turns around and surveys Honey. “The shirt is fine.” She returns to her task. “Nice tits.”
Honey looks down. It’s a revealing top and she’s not wearing a bra, because it’s a Saturday and she didn’t know they had plans until Bea told her this afternoon. “Maybe not, then.”
Bea glares at Honey out of her peripheral. “But that’s your favorite tank.”
“I have a feeling I’m going to get hit on if I wear this shirt.”
“You’re going to get hit on anyway. Keep the shirt.”
“No, I won’t, because my bitch face will keep most of the guys away.”
“Most of the guys. Which is the whole thing. Those ones will come to me.”
“Ew, you’re going to have a threesome tonight?”
“A threesome?” Bea spins around. “God, no! One at a time for me, thanks. I’m just going to fuck the other ones.”
“Other than who?” Honey asks. “I’m not fucking anyone tonight.”
Bea rolls her eyes. “You don’t know that.”
“Trust me, I do.”
“Whatever.” She digs through the closet, finding a long-buried white tennis skirt, the back pleats of the skirt puffy. Honey would never wear something like that, but Bea would– it’s probably Bea’s skirt in the first place.
“I’m not wearing that,” Honey states.
Bea wrestles her into it– seriously. She tackles Honey onto the bed and literally redresses her, the absurdity of the situation so bizarre that it completely bypasses both girls’ minds. Honey fights Bea the whole time, but Bea comes out on top. She gets her way, Honey wears the skirt, but she’s not happy about it.
“Do I, at least, get to drive?” Honey asks.
“Oh, I was going to force you,” Bea laughs. “You don’t expect me to drive you home, do you? I’ll be… indisposed.”
Honey scowls the rest of the time they spend getting ready– Bea does Honey’s hair and forces Honey to put on some light makeup, just a bit of mascara, eyeliner, and some lipgloss.
The only problem with Bea and Honey’s relationship is that Bea likes to go out, likes to meet people, likes to have a wild time, whereas Honey prefers to stay in. She’d rather watch a documentary or read a book or be present in nature than packed into a club dancefloor like a sardine in a larger can. Not that that matters to Bea.
By the time they get in the car, Bea is jumping off the walls trying to keep her secret destination to herself. Honey keeps trying to push, hoping for the right moment, but Bea won’t reveal her plans. All she does is direct Honey to the main road and type away at her phone, sending text after text to an unknown recipient, an unknown recipient that Honey is sure they’ll be meeting up with later.
They drive further into the mountains, to Honey’s surprise. They don’t head towards Winston or Statesville. They drive up, farther from town, farther from their neighbors. Near the top of the mountain, the houses are miles apart.
Perfect for a party.
Perfect for a party… thrown by boys in their twenties.
It clicks in Honey’s mind as Bea tells her to turn into the hidden driveway along the curve. “You’re not,” Honey says.
Bea laughs. “I was wondering how long it would take for you to catch on. I thought for sure you would’ve clocked me when we turned left instead of right.”
“Bea,” Honey scolds, her voice sharp. They’re on the driveway now, safe from the curves of the road, and Honey stops the car. She turns to her best friend. “You can’t be serious.”
For all of her audacity, Bea manages to understand the gravity of the situation at hand. It finally clicks in her head, why Honey isn’t happy with her plans, and why she’s even unhappier that she was dragged out here without knowing what she was walking into. She can’t just drop Bea off and leave– she would be abandoning her best friend in a house of strange boys all evening. Bea might be outgoing, but she hasn’t been hurt like Honey.
“It’s not going to be like that,” Bea reassures Honey gently, grabbing Honey’s hand with both of hers. “I promise, they’re not like that.”
“You don’t know them, Bea,” Honey explains.
“You don’t either,” Bea points out. “And this time, we’re together. The second they do something– I mean it, the second– we’ll leave. I’ll go with you. Fuckery be damned.”
Honey grimaces, rolling her shoulders to try and relieve some of the tension. She takes a deep breath, then squints at Bea. “Are you really going to fuck all of them?” She asks.
Bea grins, knowing that she’s convinced Honey to at least try and hang out with the boys. She’s smug, getting her way once again. She winks at Honey, coy. “Just the ones you don’t want,” she simpers, giggling. “You get your pick of the litter.”
“I don’t want to fuck any of them. I don’t know how many times we have to go over this.”
“So, you don’t want Trevor? ‘Cuz I was thinking–”
“Don’t fuck Trevor,” Honey groans.
“Why not?” Bea teases.
“You’re better than that, Buzzy,” Honey scoffs with a shake of her head. “He’s weird and a flirt and annoying.”
“I’m weird,” Bea says. “And a flirt. And annoying.” She puckers her lips and blows kisses at Honey as she shifts the car into drive and begins to creep down the driveway again. “Maybe it’s a match made in heaven, me and Trevor.”
“You don’t want him,” Honey growls, her voice short.
Bea shrugs and faces forward in her seat, her hands tapping her thighs. Whether it’s from nerves or excitement, Honey can’t tell. If she had to guess, though, it would be excitement. Bea is the least anxious person that Honey knows, the kind of person who can talk to anyone or anything no matter the situation.
While they might be athletes, they’ve never met anyone like Bea. Honey never has, not since she met her best friend all those years ago. They’re fucked– and she’s irresistible.
Honey and Bea pull up to the house and park under the cover, right next to the front door. This house was a point of contention when it was being built the first year Honey moved to Litchton. It was her first introduction to the gossip of the founding ladies. Scarlett and Gillian had felt particularly perturbed by the building– a five bed, four bathroom house complete with a hot tub and a game room and two stories of wraparound porches.
And it’s all made of the same wood, the same stain, the same ugly pattern. Honey cringes when she thinks about the number of trees that were cut down to make this house match. She’d think the same thing if it was made entirely out of the same stone.
Bea knocks on the door as Honey wipes her sweat from her palms. It takes a minute, but then Honey hears the scrambling of feet and the shouting between one man and his group of buddies, who are just giggling as they do what they can to cut him off from the door. Honey can see it through the thin windows bordering the door, how they rush up the stairs and down the hall. She can also see how they’re holding Trevor back as much as they can.
The brunet from the first day opens the door with a charming smile. “Hi,” he greets. “Can I help you?”
“Jack, you motherfucker–”
Honey bites back a laugh as Trevor curses and struggles, still in the grasp of the shorter boy from the first day and one of the newcomers– another brunet, a taller one. She looks at him carefully– the curl of his hair at the nape of his neck, partially hidden under a baseball cap, the curve of his eyebrows, and the slope of his lips give him away. He must be one of Jack’s brothers.
“We were invited to come over tonight,” Bea replies.
No matter how many times she hears it, Honey is always impressed by the way Bea turns on her charm and makes the people around her melt. It worked on her, too, when they first became friends all those years ago, and then less and less when Bea moved into Honey’s place when they first came to Litchton together and shared a bed for almost a year before Bea found her own townhouse. Then, her charm just got annoying, like a younger sibling who tags along with you everywhere because Mom said they had to.
It’s better for them when Bea and Honey have their time apart. Honey, especially, needs her time alone.
Jack’s eyes finally find Honey behind Bea and he grins. “That’s right,” he says, tapping his forehead like he just remembered. Honey can tell that all he’s doing is messing with Trevor, though. “The party! You must be the girls that Z invited. Hi, Honey.”
“Hi, Jack,” Honey replies, short and sweet. She turns on her customer service voice just for this. She finds Cole next to Trevor and smiles when her eyes slide over the imprisoned boy, as passive as she can be. “Hi, Cole.”
“Hey, Honey,” Cole says with an easy smile. Honey wants to snort and laugh– he’s got a smile that could get him into or out of anything. She wonders briefly if he’s childish and impish, still, even in their adult age, just because he’s got the smile to match.
Jack steps aside and lets the girls enter the house. He closes the door behind them and Honey has a sneaking suspicion that if she turned to glance at him, he’d be staring at one of their backsides. She doesn’t look. It’s not worth the joke that she could make if she caught him.
Bea nudges Honey and points up.
Honey tilts her head, and– “A chandelier made of moose antlers. Wow,” she marvels. She makes a face at Bea, then continues. “That’s really… something.”
“Isn’t it sick?” Cole asks, finally dropping Trevor’s arm and joining the girls where they stand. He spreads his arms out from his sides and spins in a slow circle. When he makes a full turn, he looks at both girls and wiggles his eyebrows. “Want a tour?”
The girls agree and Cole takes them throughout the house, leaving the other boys behind. From their pounding feet, Honey figures they’re headed downstairs, while Cole takes them upstairs. He shows them the bedrooms, the bathrooms, the common areas, the hallways, the outlet in his room that doesn’t work, and much more. They go back downstairs and get the same treatment– Cole even opens the fridge and helps himself to a beverage before offering anything to the girls. They see the kitchen, the living room, the den, the dining room and patio. Cole shows them the wraparound porch and its chairs. Honey takes in the view– it’s just as good as the one from her living room.
Finally, finally, they make their way down to the basement. It’s a smaller room, minimized by a covered porch and larger patio with a hot tub. The basement is clearly the man cave, the game room, or whatever you want to call it. There’s a pool table, a large TV, a ping pong table, a foosball table… everything a boy could want.
As evidenced by the two boys sitting on the couches near the pool table, while the other two wield sticks and study the position of the balls on the table.
Honey finds Trevor on the couch with Jack. His eyes found her first as she walked down the stairs and he hasn’t stopped staring. Neither has she, to be fair.
“Pool,” Bea notices. She looks at Honey and Honey shakes her head. Bea nods. “Honey and I are next,” she announces anyway.
“Oh, yeah?” Jack asks with a little laugh. “Are you any good?”
“I’m okay,” Bea says. She pauses, lets a smirk on her face grow as she looks over to Honey. “Honey’s worse.”
The boys turn to Honey. “Are you?” Trevor asks.
“I wager she could still beat you, Z,” says the only boy that Honey had not seen when they arrived at the house earlier. He’s got dark hair, but it’s also hidden under a backwards cap. The only difference between him and his brothers, assuming he is one of the brothers that Trevor mentioned on Monday, is that he’s smaller, more sullen. The telltale sign is that his comment is offhanded, delivered with the calm venom of an older brother who knows exactly where to bite. He doesn’t even look at Trevor as he lines up his shot and sinks the ball.
Honey likes him immediately.
When she looks over, she notices that Bea likes him too. Her lips are pursed in thought, only the minutest pout on her mouth. There’s a tiny smile pulling at her cheek and her eyes are twinkling under the bright lights, but they would be hazardous in a club.
It’s a game they’ve played before. Bea sucks at pool– she always has, but… when you suck at pool, either the person you’re playing with will laugh at you or they’ll try to give you tips. The night usually ends with Bea sinking the 8 ball with a little bit of help from her gentleman caller and a celebratory, “thank you” kiss.
Honey, however, loves pool. She wasn’t always great at pool, but found that, like almost everything, the more she practiced, the better she became. When Bea’s celebratory kisses turned into rushed hookups in the Winston-Salem dive bar bathrooms, Honey got her fair share of tips and tricks from the other men around. Usually, she would try to shack up with the alcoholic middle aged men who had nothing better to do than sip on their beer and play pool after dinner with their wives. It was rare that they flirted with Honey and she liked it that way.
The game goes like this: Bea finds a group of men that puff up their chest at the idea of beating a woman at pool, she “lets them win” against her (as if she would’ve won in the first place), and then it’s Honey’s turn. Honey, of course, feints a few shots and lets the men get comfortable before coming from behind and beating them. Usually, her win results in two drinks for her and her friend.
Today, the drinks won’t be her bargaining chip.
“What would you wager?” Honey asks the boy who last spoke. “If it were a real bet.”
His stormy eyes look her up and down while Jack’s brother, the tall one, paces around the table to find his best shot. “Money, normally,” he drawls. “But I’d rather not lose my money betting on you if you’re worse than her.” He nods to Bea, who takes the chance to blatantly look him up and down.
“How about this,” Bea proposes, twirling a strand of hair between her fingers. “I’ll play the winner of this game and then we’ll see if Honey can beat Trevor. If I win, I get whatever I want, obviously. If Honey wins…”
Honey meets Bea’s eyes. She nods, knowing that Bea is thinking back to the night when they visited ECU their junior year of high school and witnessed a rugby party in the flesh. It’s their usual punishment when their outings feature a house party and a pool table.
“...Trevor has to do a Zulu Run,” Bea finishes.
Honey finds Trevor again and smiles, overexaggerated and sickly sweet.
“What’s a Zulu Run?” Trevor asks, looking to the other boys and finding nothing but confusion. On the girls’ faces, he just sees plotted mayhem.
“It’s fun, don’t worry,” Honey reassures him. “You only have to do it if you lose. Which, I mean, if I’m worse than Bea, then you should be fine.”
Honey sits on the loveseat across from Trevor and Jack, while Bea sits down next to Jack. Her knee presses against his, subtly, just enough that you can’t tell if it’s deliberate or just a lack of room on the couch and Honey presses her hand to her lips to hide a smile.
“So you’re Jack,” Bea says, interrupting the conversation that he and Trevor had been in when the girls walked down the stairs.
Honey watches as Bea makes her eyes look wide and soft, very flirtatious and fairy-like. She’s got the perfect complexion for it– the light dusting of freckles over her skin, the ounce of baby fat still left in her cheeks and all the right places along her body, her expression just the right amount of interested but not desperate.
For a brief moment, Honey wishes she was more like Bea.
“You’ve heard of me?” Jack asks with a little smirk.
Bea scoffs and waves him off. “Don’t flatter yourself. Honey didn’t even tell me your name.”
Jack’s bright eyes turn to Honey. “Oh, yeah?” He tilts his chin up in challenge. “What is it with you and names? You wouldn’t tell Trevor yours, you haven’t properly introduced me to…”
“Bea,” Bea supplies.
Honey shakes her head fondly at her best friend’s eagerness. Honey bites her tongue to keep her comments at bay, and instead plasters a tight smile on her face. “I didn’t realize I would be seeing you all again,” Honey says, forcing politeness into her voice. “And I’m not the one who’s weird about names.”
Jack and Trevor share a look. Jack hides a snort poorly.
“What?” Honey asks, her eyebrows raised and her mouth in a straight, unimpressed line.
Jack smirks and Trevor shakes his head. Jack speaks anyway. “I don’t know how you would have avoided us,” Jack says. “Considering.”
“Considering…?” Bea asks, leaning around Jack to look at Trevor. Honey catches Trevor’s panicked glance and can guess what Jack’s alluding to. She jumps in, hoping to switch the subject.
“Nothing to consider,” Honey and Trevor say at the same time. Trevor sounds rushed, Honey sounds indifferent. Both of their jaws drop and they stare at each other, Honey affronted and Trevor surprised.
Cole, who had been sitting on the stool-saddles near the pool table, steps over the back of the couch and weasels his way between Trevor and Jack. “Creepy,” he says. “You’re like the twins from the Shining.”
Trevor cringes. “You know, I don’t think we are.”
Honey just hums, picking up her drink and taking a sip. She clears her throat and turns back to Jack. “So those are your brothers?” She nods over to the pool table, where the shorter boy is lining up the 8-ball with the corner pocket. “Trevor said you had family coming.”
Honey doesn’t miss the smirk and blush on Trevor’s face when she says his name, even as he dips his head and takes a gulp of his beer to cover it up.
Jack smiles, a genuine smile. It’s easy to tell the difference with him, when he’s really smiling or if he’s smiling because he thinks he’s supposed to.
“Yeah, the goons.” Jack looks over his shoulder and grins as his taller brother loses his game of pool. “C’mon, Rusty, you brought that pool stick all this way and your game still sucks?”
The taller boy glares at Jack and sulks, re-racking his stick. He walks over and stands awkwardly behind the couch, but flicks Jack on the back of the head and Honey giggles before she can help it.
She looks down at her lap after letting out the little laugh and misses the way Trevor’s eyes light up and train on her.
“Luke, you fucker,” Jack swears, flinching at the impact of Luke’s flick. Jack frowns, his eyebrows furrowed as he rubs the back of his head. “He’s my little brother.”
“Little brother,” Honey repeats. “And you’re just going to let him flick you like that?”
Jack rolls his eyes. “Very funny, Honey. Obviously I’m not going to let him get away with it.” He reaches around and half-asses a punch to Luke’s dick, just hard enough that it expels an “oof” from the younger boy and he doubles over a little bit.
The other boy interrupts. “Quit it,” he says. He glares at his brothers, then his eyes fix on Bea. “Your turn.”
Bea stands and smiles, a smug little smirk reserved for her conspiratory looks with Honey that signifies that she’s getting what she wanted. She joins the man by the rack of sticks and clasps her hands behind her back, looking up at him through her eyelashes. “Which stick should I use?”
Jack looks a little put out by the loss of Bea at his side, and casts a glare toward his other brother. “And that’s Quinn,” he says curtly. “Pool master, or whatever.”
“So he’s the best in the house?” Honey asks.
“We’ll tally scores at the end of the summer,” Luke jumps in as Quinn says, “Absolutely.”
Jack scowls. “You just think that because you’re older. Remember, Quinn: first is the worst. Second is the best.”
Trevor snorts and takes another sip of his beer.
He’s unnaturally quiet, Honey thinks. Trying to be cool in front of his friends, maybe.
“I take it you’re the second child,” Honey says. “That makes sense.”
“That makes sense?” Jack asks, repeating her statement like he can’t believe she dared to say that. “What the fuck does that mean?”
Honey looks over at Bea, who presses her lips together and raises her eyebrows. Daring Honey.
Honey rolls her head back, stretching the muscles of her neck. “You…” She starts, trailing off because she’s not sure how to finish the sentence without sounding mean. She scratches her eyebrow and scrunches her nose. “You like attention,” she decides, trying to keep her voice as free of judgment as possible.
“Do I?” Jack asks, sounding unimpressed.
Honey shrugs. “You– I mean. Jack, you asked. You opened the door for us because you knew it would annoy Trevor, probably because you knew it would bother him that you were opening the door for m– us, instead of him. You flirt and smile when Bea sits next to you but you lean back and manspread when she gets up like you don’t want us to notice that you’re sitting without a girl at your side. You call your little brother a “fucker” and retaliate because you can, honestly escalating the situation from a flick to a punch to the dick. You act annoyed because your older brother is beating you at pool already this summer and it only just started, plus he took the girl from your side. It’s, uh… yeah. You like attention.”
Everyone but Jack starts to laugh.
“Stand up,” Cole says to Honey.
She does, her arms resting by her side awkwardly, her fingers twitching as she waits for him to do something.
Cole looks around the room and swears under his breath. “I didn’t think this through, one second,” he mutters, and disappears upstairs.
Honey continues to stand there. She pats her hands against her thighs and looks around the room, trying not to make eye contact with anyone, but especially not Bea. If she makes eye contact with Bea, she’s going to burst out laughing.
Trevor is still snickering, hiding his face in his shirt. Honey can still see the little crinkles by his eyes.
“She clocked you, man,” Quinn says with a shrug before pulling out a pool stick and standing it next to Bea. It comes up to the tip of her shoulder, Quinn’s chest. He nods in satisfaction and hands the stick over. Honey lets out a relieved breath of air at his approval, and then stifles a second when she watches Bea’s fingers brush over Quinn’s on the stick, her eyes lingering on his for just a second too long.
It’s too easy for her.
Cole comes bounding down the stairs with a plastic soccer trophy in his hand. “Found this when I was snooping,” he says, approaching Honey and holding it out. He stands directly in front of her, makes eye contact with her, and stares into her eyes. “Thank you,” he says with a sincere nod. “For taking Jack down a peg. He needed that. We all needed that.”
And he hands the trophy off to Honey with a handshake, like she’s graduating from high school and he’s the principal handing her a diploma. He takes the handshake and pulls her into a hug, the trophy crushed awkwardly between them.
When he pulls away, Cole puts both hands on Honey’s arms and stares into her eyes again. “If you’re going to do that again, please don’t do it to me.”
Quinn breaks the rack with a crack of his stick, standing at a slight angle, and Honey sits back down, cradling her trophy in her hands.
Cole engages Honey in conversation for a few minutes, with Luke jumping in here and there. Jack turns on the TV and pouts. As much as she tries not to notice it, Trevor just stays quiet and sips his beer and sneaks glances at Honey out of the corner of his eye.
Eventually, the conversation dies out and the group turns their attention to the television, which is streaming some hockey game that Honey doesn’t have an interest in. The boys are chitchatting away, throwing out names and positions and yelling at the TV when a call doesn’t go their way– Honey can’t tell who’s cheering for what team, but she can also tell that Jack and Luke don’t like the team in white… at all. Trevor seems to prefer them over the team in red. Cole doesn’t seem to care. He’s just laughing, still, at Jack. Jack just sulks, but he seems to cheer up once the team in red scores, late in the first period.
“You all really like hockey, huh?” Bea asks between turns. Quinn has sunken a ball almost every turn, but Bea has only sunken one. Honey grins at her, then glances at the pool table and back to Bea. Bea sticks her tongue out at Honey, playful and easy. If Quinn’s the kind of guy that Honey thinks he is, it’s only a matter of time before he starts teaching Bea some tricks to tighten up the game.
Cole laughs. “Yeah, I mean, I’d hope so.”
“What do you mean?” Bea asks, batting her eyelashes innocently, like she didn’t read all of Trevor’s Wikipedia page before coming here.
“We play,” Luke says with a shrug.
Honey and Bea lock eyes and Honey plays along with her game. She tilts her head and blinks, as if this is the first time she’s hearing it. “Are you any good?”
Quinn snorts and shakes his head as Bea leans over to line up a shot and Honey notices his hand on her waist when he points at a different ball, explaining that that would be the better shot for her. Bea sinks the recommended ball and jumps up with a cheer, smiling brightly at Quinn and standing just a little closer than she would if she wanted to be just friends.
“We’re alright,” Trevor says, the first words he’s said to Honey since she walked through the door. He stands. “Does anyone want another beer?”
The boys’ voices ring out in a chorus of yesses, whereas Honey stays mostly quiet. Bea agrees to another drink as well, which is when Trevor turns to Honey. “You’re sure you don’t want another drink? I’m already getting them for everyone.”
“I’m sure, but thank you,” Honey says.
“Why don’t you go and help him carry the drinks,” Bea suggests from her post next to Quinn.
Honey glares at her, but stands. She leaves her trophy on her seat, saving it. “Fine,” she replies, hoping the edge in her voice is only detectable to her best friend. She follows Trevor up the stairs to the kitchen, like an antisocial cat who has FOMO, but only when it comes to their owner. She crinkles her nose in disgust when she realizes that that’s how she looks, not that Trevor would notice or care. Actually, he would probably be elated if she compared herself to a cat following him around.
Trevor opens the fridge and sifts around, the bottles of beer clinking. The beer takes up most of the bottom shelf, unsurprisingly.
“Do you think you have enough?” Honey asks, unable to help herself when Trevor passes her a third bottle, each a different brand of beer, to carry.
“Q and J like Michelob, Luke is a Miller guy, Coley likes Budweiser, and I’m more of a Modelo drinker.” Trevor’s head is buried in the back of the fridge, rifling through a pack of Millers that seem to be running low. “We’ve had to go to the store three times since that first day because we keep running out of the one beer that someone wants.”
He retreats from the refrigerator and turns to Honey. He’s got two beers in his hand. He holds them up and asks, “Which one do you think Bea wants?”
Honey weighs her choices, but ultimately chooses the Michelob. Bea will use it as a jumping point for her conversation with Quinn– it’s a no-brainer. As annoying as Bea’s boy-craziness is, Honey is always going to be her wingwoman and helper when she can.
“Cool,” Trevor says and returns the other beer to the shelf. He turns back to Honey and takes two of the beers she was carrying, leaving her with just two, the Budweiser and the Modelo.
“I thought you were a Modelo drinker,” Honey says.
“I am,” Trevor replies, heading towards the stairs.
Honey follows. “Then why am I holding your beer?”
“Because I want you to hand it to me.”
Honey snorts out a laugh. “Okay.”
When they return downstairs, they distribute the beer. Honey hands Cole his Budweiser and waits for Trevor to finish handing out the beers to the Hughes brothers and her friend. Bea has finally managed to get Quinn to do the work for her, with him leaning behind her and guiding her arms over the cue, pointing out where she should be looking and where to hit the ball. There are no other balls on the table except the 8 ball, which makes Honey chuckle. There’s no way Bea sunk all of hers– Quinn had to have “mistakenly” knocked a few in for her.
Trevor returns to the sitting area and Honey stands, offering him the Modelo in her hand. On purpose, she realizes, Trevor closes his hand over her own to take the beer from her and thanks her with a smile, his eyes far too kind to be harmless and friendly.
Honey shakes her head with a look, then frowns when Trevor plops his happy ass right down on the other side of her loveseat. She shakes her head again and chooses to watch the end of the pool game, sitting on one of the stool-saddles near the table. She claps when Bea finally sinks the 8 ball after her third whiff. The ball only sinks because Quinn leaned over Bea again and did it for her, working together to finish the game.
“I win!” Bea squeals in delight, jumping in celebration in front of Quinn.
He lets out a little chuckle, the most awkwardly and quietly endearing laugh that Honey has ever heard. “You won,” he agrees. “With my help.”
Bea tilts her chin up and smiles at Quinn, proud of herself. “So we both win,” she says. “That means we both get whatever we want.”
Honey bites her tongue and ducks her head, waiting for what’s coming next. She wants to turn around and look out the window, even though you can’t see anything in the dark mountainside now that the sun has set. The thing is, she also wants to see the boys’ reactions to what Bea is going to say next.
Quinn smiles, a little tiny smile. His focus is only on Bea, who has inched her way closer to him somehow. There’s not much more room between them. “Whatever you want,” he repeats. “What do you want, Bea?”
Honey watches Quinn’s face, but she’s torn. She also wants to watch Jack.
“You know that tour Cole took us on when Honey and I first got here?” Bea asks, reaching out and smoothing out the turned-up fabric of Quinn’s sleeve.
“Yeah,” Quinn replies, a little confused.
Bea rests her hand on his arm, slowly making her way down so she can wrap her hand around his fingers. She watches herself do it, then looks up at Quinn through her lashes. “I don’t think I saw your bedroom,” she says. “Would you care to show me?”
Quinn’s lips part in surprise and Honey watches his eyes search Bea’s own for… insincerity, maybe?
At the same time, Jack chokes on a sip of his beer. Honey’s eyes fly to him and Cole pats his back as Jack coughs it out.
“Jesus Christ,” Jack says, clapping his hand against his chest and coughing one last time.
Bea smiles at him, oozing confidence and a little showmanship, as Quinn leads her to the stairs. He lets her climb them first and Honey giggles when Quinn sneaks a glance at Bea’s ass and visibly relaxes before hurrying to catch up with her and get his hands on her hips. Bea’s twinkling laughter grows softer and softer as she bounds up the stairs, her footfalls growing heavier as Quinn closes in on her.
“Well shit, Jack,” Cole says. “I guess you’re not the first to fall into bed with a girl this summer. The streak is finally over.”
“You don’t know that,” Jack says, pushing Cole’s hand off of his shoulder. He turns to face Honey, looking hopeful and a little desperate. “Wanna help me keep my streak up?”
A loud honking laugh escapes Honey. “Absolutely fucking not,” she replies, still laughing. She shakes her head at Jack, then notices the small, but mightily proud smile on Trevor’s lips.
Choosing not to focus on that smile, a smile that she’s inadvertently becoming very fond of because she’s never seen him smile at his friends the way Trevor is smiling at her, Honey hops up from her stool and starts to gather the balls from the pockets of the table. She racks them, then grabs her cue and waves Trevor over. “I believe we had a game to play.”
“You had a game to lose,” Trevor corrects, standing and approaching Honey. He grabs his own stick, the one Quinn abandoned on the edge of the table when Bea proposed her bedroom shenanigans.
“Hmm,” Honey voices, raising her eyebrows and exaggerating a grimace. “Consider me scared. Your break, Trevor.”
“When I win,” Trevor says. “I want to buy you dinner.” He lines up the cue ball and shoots, the colorful triangle of balls destroyed in a single swoop. One of the solids finds its way into a pocket and Trevor smirks.
“What a boring prize,” Honey muses. “But if you insist on those terms, then I agree.” She sticks out her hand to shake his. “And when I win…”
She leans down and eyes a line of three balls. The striped nine is farthest from the hole, but Honey wants to prove a point, so she angles her stick down at a steep slope and pushes– noticing Trevor’s mouth flattening into a line when her ball jumps over the other two and tips into the hole. She stands back up to her full height, tilting her head to the side. She cocks her hip and positions her hand against it, holding the cue up on her other side.
“I’m really going to enjoy your Zulu Run, Trevor.”
Cole whistles lowly from the couch. “I need to find you another trophy, girl.”
Honey shoots him a wink.
They play on. Trevor takes it easy– plays the safe route. With each easy fall into the pocket, he fistpumps to celebrate. Honey can only imagine how insufferable he is at the bowling alley.
She shows him up, not even daring to let him pull ahead in their race and convince himself that he has a chance. She sinks the final black ball into the right-center pocket, bending herself all the way over the table to give him a good view of the girl who’s beating him. Her hips are high on the other side of the table, balancing up on her tip toes, facing the seating area. She doesn’t even look at the ball when she hits it, no, she’s looking up at Trevor with a tilted smile and mocking, bragging eyes.
His eyes evaluate her– eyes, to lips, to chest, to ass. To the boys, making sure they aren’t looking, aren’t gawking at the round globes of Honey’s ass that are presented before them. Back to her ass. Her ass.
Honey stands, slowly, making sure Trevor memorizes the curve of her waist when she does. Her eyes drop to his pants, a smirk growing in time with his bulge, and she rests her hands on the edge of the table. She pulls her shoulders back, broadening her chest.
It’s just a dominant stance. All Honey enjoys about this is the fact that his resolve and dignity crumble at the mere sight of a pretty girl bent before him. She likes knowing that he’s weak for her, but that she’ll never do anything about it.
She’s not looking for that.
“A Zulu Run,” Honey explains, clearing her throat to rid her voice of its sultry tinges. She shakes her hair back, over her shoulders. Trevor’s eyes darken at the sight of her throat. She smiles, but continues. “Is when you have to strip, sing a song, and streak around the house until the song is over.” She throws a glance over her shoulder at the other boys. “Usually your friends get to pick your song.”
Jack perks up at that. Honey turns and hops up on the ledge of the pool table, knowing that Trevor’s eyes have fallen to her behind. Jack looks at Honey with delight in his eyes, seeming to forgive her in an instant for psychoanalyzing him earlier in the night. His eyes slide to Trevor and the look in them seems more akin to yearning for vengeance.
“So, boys,” Honey drawls. “What’ll it be?”
They scramble over each other to reach her, shouting song suggestions as they fly into their head. Honey can’t hear anything they’re saying, so she laughs until they fall silent. Cole’s hand presses into the side of her thigh, she looks down at it in disgust, then back up at him. It falls to the edge of the table, noticeable space between her and the appendage.
“How about this,” Honey decides. She sneaks a glance at Trevor, gloating as she lets her eyes roam all over his body. She takes in his arms, his thighs under his shorts, the way his shirt falls over his shoulders. “Trevor looks pretty fit. Why don’t we all pick a song?” She winks at him. “Make him run for, oh, eleven minutes or so?”
A flicker of recognition passes through Trevor’s gaze, but it’s quickly replaced by disbelief. He doesn’t know how she would know– weren’t they subtle about it? She lets out a breath of a laugh at the look– no, Trevor, you weren’t subtle, she thinks. but it’s cute that you think you are.
She realizes what she was thinking in a split second and shakes herself out of it, snapping her face forward and crossing her legs knee-over-knee.
“But only his friends get to pick, so I guess I’m out.” Honey hops down from her perch and breaks through the boys, settling herself on the loveseat with her trophy, laying out to take up as much space as she could. She picks up the remote from the table and places her other hand behind her head, navigating to the Roku menu screen. “Do we have Spotify on this thing?”
Luke, Jack, and Cole each pick a song and Cole helps Honey connect to the outdoor speakers. He re-presents her with her trophy with a flourish and a bow, playful and lame. The boys push Trevor out to the patio with a whoop, pulling at his clothes even as Trevor fights them.
Honey follows at a distance and watches through the glass door. She looks away when Trevor sheds his underwear and waits for Luke’s countdown to end before looking back up. She doesn’t want to see it. That’s just too far. She gets an eyeful of his ass as he rounds the corner of the house, though.
As Trevor starts his third song, Cole’s cheesy Taylor Swift pick (“You can’t outrun my music now, bitch!”), Jack joins Honey at the door.
“I think I’m going to head home,” Honey tells him, rubbing over the skin on her arms.
Jack nods at her, shrugging easily. “I’ll walk you out.”
Honey leads him up the stairs, hearing Trevor’s whoops grow louder as he finishes the second verse of the song. She knows he catches them walking up the stairs because his singing falters for a moment. His steps speed up. So do Honey’s.
She walks briskly to the front door, bordering on a speedwalk, with Jack behind her. She swings her keys over her finger and wrenches the front door open. Jack catches it before it hits the wall.
“What about Bea?” He asks, calling after Honey and making her pause.
“She’ll find her way home,” Honey replies and steps off again. She has to get out of here before Trevor races up the stairs to stop her from being alone with Jack and she gets an eyeful of his– junk.
“Honey!” Jack calls again.
She lurches to a stop and cringes, turning to face the boy.
"Honey, I don't think I'm going to flirt with you anymore."
Honey takes a breath, walking back and reaching up to pat Jack's cheek, just forceful enough that it'll sting for a moment after she walks away. It's not quite a hit, but it's definitely not a love tap. "That doesn't hold the power that you think it does," she tells him with a nod and a close-lipped smile. She goes to leave, but Jack stops her by grabbing her hand.
"Trevor likes you, you know. He was quiet tonight, but he likes you. He's reading that book you gave him and everything," Jack says in earnest, his blues boring into Honey's own eyes.
Honey picks up on the unsaid words. He's trying, take it easy on him, he might be annoying but he's good, and he likes you. You should like him too, and all of that.
The edges of Honey's smile soften and she gently pulls her hand from Jack's. "It's nice to know he can read," she replies, deflecting. Whatever Trevor feels for her, not that he can really feel anything because he doesn't know her like that, doesn't matter. She's not looking for that right now. "Thanks for hosting us, Jack. I'm sorry for what I... said."
"It's okay." Jack shrugs. "Thanks for coming."
"Goodnight," Honey bids him, and starts to walk away.
"Come back," Jack says, and Honey whips around and finds him looking like the words surprised him when he heard himself speak. He clears his throat. "Friday. Um, it's— it's National Chocolate Ice Cream Day and National Donut Day." He scuffs the tip of his shoe against the ground. "Really... important holiday."
Honey can't do anything but laugh. "I'll bring the donuts."
She walks to her car and ignores the chirping of bullfrogs echoing in her ears as she drives down the mountain to her home, alone.
7:90 – TREVOR
Jack glares at Trevor when he walks down to the kitchen early the next morning. As Trevor rubs the sleep out of his eyes with a yawn, Jack shifts under the frozen pack of peas that rests precariously on his shoulderblades. Trevor had barely touched him last night, he was just being dramatic. So he had a bit of soreness on his back from where Trevor pushed him against the wall and asked him what the hell he was doing, who cares? He went upstairs with Trevor’s girl. Alone.
“Bea’s taking you to church with her this morning for laying a finger on me,” Jack growls out when Trevor looks at him and laughs.
“No shit,” Trevor replies, snorting.
“It’s true,” comes the female voice from the couch. Bea leans forward, her tube top skewed and tilted enough to draw a wandering eye. Trevor rolls his. “You shouldn’t get violent, not on my watch.”
“You weren’t even with me last night, Bea,” Trevor says sweetly, tilting his head down to dismiss her. “You didn’t see me do shit. How can you prove it was me and not Luke?”
“Luke put a video of it on his private story, then showed me,” Bea snickers in the same tone. “So you’re taking me home and helping me choose my best church outfit to hide these hickeys, and then you’ll join me at the service. It’ll be good for your reputation in town.”
“I don’t really care about my reputation in town,” Trevor laughs.
“Honey cares about your reputation in town,” Bea clarifies, a tight, ‘there’s no room for discussion here’ smile on her face. She pointedly looks him up and down. “Little Bear.”
Trevor scowls at her condescending tone and use of the nickname. How dare she flaunt her inner circle-ness to Trevor.
“I was going to go to church anyway,” Trevor boasts. “Vera told me to bring all of the boys.”
“Well, you’re the only one resorting to violence–” Jack begins, seething, before Bea cuts him off.
“No, this is a good idea,” she says, waving her hand to quiet him. “We should all go to church.”
Jack scoffs. “I don’t think we need to go,” he says. “Sounds like you’ve got an ulterior motive.”
“I don’t want the town to think y’all are reclusive party folk who have no interest in the happenings of Litchton,” Bea snaps. “You’d be surprised how quickly the old grannies will turn on you.”
“And you get to walk into church with five guys on your arm,” Jack says, still scowling. This time, his attention is focused on Bea, not the man who physically hurt him the night before.
“Said she wanted five guys, she ain’t talking ‘bout burgers,” Trevor deadpans, a disgusted look thrown Bea’s way.
She’s unperturbed by it, probably from many years of Honey– Honey.– throwing her similar looks. All Bea does is smile and reply, “My pussy already got murdered, Trev. I didn’t need five guys.”
“No way Quinn ‘murdered’ your pussy, Bea,” Jack jumps in, air quotes around the word. “The dude doesn’t fuck.”
Bea laughs. “I assure you, he fucks.”
“Yeah, I fuck,” Quinn agrees, descending the stairs. He veers to the couch first and drops a kiss on Bea’s head in greeting.
“Well, fuck your way to church,” Jack says. “Bea’s making everyone go with her.” Jack looks at Quinn expectantly, maybe waiting for pushback.
Quinn shrugs. “Okay,” he says. “It’s not like there’s anything else for us to do on a Sunday morning in this place. Everything is probably closed.”
“It’s true, everything is closed on Sundays except the grocery store and the gas station,” Bea says with a nod. “And the church, of course.”
Jack scowls and removes his pack of peas from his back. Trevor takes his opportunity to approach the fridge, conveniently behind Jack. “Why can’t we just stay here?”
“Because it’ll be fun,” Trevor replies, trying to exude optimism now that he’s not the only boy being forced to attend church and wash themselves of their sins. He turns and purposefully claps his hand down on Jack’s shoulder, hard. Jack howls in pain. Trevor squeezes just to watch him tense up. “It’s our chance to become one with the community, Jacky.”
Bea smiles, voice dripping with cheerfulness. “Yeah, Jacky, it’ll be good for you. Why don’t you two head upstairs and change?” Her eyes fix on Quinn, whose shirt rides up as he grabs a glass from the upper shelves of the cabinets. “I want to chit-chat with Quinn for a second.”
Trevor and Jack make a face, but scramble towards the stairs. They push and shove each other all the way up– Trevor is particularly satisfied when Jack bumps into the wall and groans– then split off into their respective rooms. Trevor treats it like a race– whoever finishes changing first wins.
Jack is already back downstairs by the time Trevor returns. Cole is there, and Luke, and both of them seem to be dressed for the service too. None of the boys have the best church clothes, but it’s a small town with farmers. Surely not everyone will be in their Sunday best every Sunday. Quinn is noticeably missing, but Bea is standing by the door with a smile on her face. Her lips look a little more red than they did before Trevor went upstairs. He narrows his eyes at her.
“You, and you,” Bea says, pointing at Jack and Trevor. “Come with me. Trevor, grab your car keys. You’re driving.”
“What about Luke and Cole?” Trevor asks, picking up his keys from their spot on the hook next to the door and trailing behind Bea. Jack trails behind Trevor, still grumbling and pretending like his shoulders hurt for dramatic effect. Trevor ought to show him some real pain next time.
The three people climb into the car, Trevor behind the wheel and Bea in the passenger seat. Jack, once again, finds himself relegated to the backseat. He straps himself in and Trevor catches his murderous glare in the rearview mirror.
“Quinn’s going to drive them,” Bea explains. “They’ll meet us at the church.”
“Whipped,” Jack coughs out. He does a terrible job of masking the word.
Trevor rolls his eyes, just like Bea. She opens her mouth to say something, sass him, but thinks better of it.
They drive on in silence, the occasional sigh or grunt from Jack as he shifts in his seat. Trevor glares at him again in the mirror and Jack hits him with a fake smile before looking out the window to watch the trees whip by.
Bea directs them to the main strip of shops, then tells them to take a left onto one of the sidestreets near The Reading Nook. They pull up to a big brick house, separated down the middle by a massive staircase. Bea climbs the stairs and turns to the left again, unlocking and pushing her front door open.
She leads the boys into her living room, which is decorated exactly how Trevor expected it to be. The couch is white with pink pillows and a white shag rug beneath it. Her furniture is odd, thrifted and worn in. None of it matches, although Trevor suspects that her theme was “Barbie girl aesthetic.” It’s messy, and comfortable, and Trevor almost envies how she lives. His apartment in Anaheim is sparse– when you’re on the road so much and as busy with your job as Trevor is, you really only need a place to eat and sleep. His decorations reflect that.
Trevor sprawls out on the couch, leaving Jack standing awkwardly next to the coffee table. Bea disappears down the hall and enters her bedroom, her closet door creaking open.
“Jack, come here, will you?” Bea asks.
Jack’s eyebrows furrow in confusion, but he starts down the hallway nonetheless.
Trevor snoops in his absence, Jack’s presence no longer a threat to his comfort. He drags himself off of the couch and stands, advancing towards the shelves of knickknacks on the wall near the television.
Bea has got a number of books on her shelves, overtaking two of the four rows. The other rows are sparse and far more interesting– there are picture frames spread along the rows, six frames that depict Bea’s life and what she loves.
Four of the pictures feature Honey. The other two are groups of people that Trevor assumes are Bea’s family, her extended family on each of her parents’ sides. He can ignore those easily, not caring about about Bea to scan each of her cousins’ faces. The pictures with Honey are a different story.
There’s a picture of the two when they were ten, or eleven, riding their bikes down an asphalt street lined with suburban houses. Bea’s bike is pink with streamers and flowers and a little basket. Honey’s is dark green and sporty, similar to Trevor’s own bicycle from childhood. Honey’s smile is wry, whereas Bea’s is glowing.
The second, from a birthday party. It’s Honey’s birthday and they’re four, from the looks of the lit candle on her cake. Honey’s smile is wide, much wider than the previous image. Her hair is messy and her tongue is stained green, probably from a lollipop or a Jolly Rancher. Her arms are wrapped around Bea’s neck and she’s pulled her friend close, their cheeks pressing together. Bea’s expression is a little different. Only one of her eyes is squeezed shut, the one closer to Honey. Her lips are pursed like a duck and her little fingers are raised in a peace sign.
Trevor chuckles. If his mom had been the one taking the picture, she would’ve said “What a ham” about the girls’ goofiness.
In the next picture, they’re older. They’re sixteen, probably. Bea’s wearing these short jean shorts and a bikini top and Honey wears a matching top under some long, gray sweatpants. She rolled the waistband up and her back is mostly to the camera, Bea lifted off the ground in a swooping hug. Bea’s legs are kicked up behind her like she’s experiencing a really good, Princess Diaries kind of kiss and her face is frozen in laughter. Honey’s is the same. Trevor’s heart clenches at the smile on her face and the way her hair blows out behind her.
Finally, there’s a selfie of the two of them in a handmade frame. It’s from a high angle and Trevor can’t tell if it’s a .5 picture or a regular one. Honey’s eyebrow is raised and she wears an exaggeratedly thoughtful expression, goofy enough to tug at Trevor’s smile. Bea’s mouth is open and she has a hand pinching Honey’s chin, while the other is raised to take the picture. Behind them is the Welcome to Litchton sign that Trevor passes each time he goes into town.
Trevor’s eyes glide down to the handmade frame, the written message along the top and bottom borders.
“New Beginnings!” and smaller, in the corner, a more personalized message. Trevor thinks that she wrote the message in a thin Sharpie– it’s too pristine still, after years. “There’s no one I would rather have join me in Litchton than you. Thank you for always being the Bea to my Honey! Honeybea 4ever <3”.
Trevor reaches out and takes the frame in his hand, inspecting it. He turns it over. More script, also in a Sharpie: “2019”, it reads. He replaces the item, making sure it’s back in the exact right spot.
“Bea, hurry up!” Trevor calls, returning to the couch.
“Don’t get your panties in a twist,” she replies, leading Jack out of her bedroom. She’s clasping a necklace as she walks, then holds out her wrist and a bracelet for Jack to clasp. “We can go now.”
They leave the apartment and climb back into the car, Jack beating Bea out for the passenger seat this time. He’s smug about it too, grinning to himself while he buckles up. Trevor opens the back door for Bea and helps her into the car with a guiding hand in hers. When Jack realizes that he fumbled the chance to look like a gentleman, his face returns to its scowl.
“If you’re not careful, your face will get stuck like that,” Trevor warns when he finally sits behind the wheel again. He shifts the car into drive and pulls out of the parking space.
Bea directs them to the church and Trevor pulls into the parking lot next to Quinn’s car, which is still running. They’ve got about five minutes before the service begins and Bea chastises the three boys for not going inside and reserving seats early.
“There’s only a few instances where the whole town goes out to do something,” Bea complains as they walk inside. “Church is one of them. We’re never going to find a spot for all six of us.”
“No Honey?” Trevor asks, taken aback. He expected her to join them, especially since the ‘whole town’ is here.
Bea casts Trevor a look and snickers into her palm. “You’re sweet, Trevor,” she says and Trevor rolls his eyes at her saccharine tone. “But Honey decided a long time ago that she had enough religion in her life growing up. She and God know where they stand.”
Trevor reaches the door to the church first and holds it open for the group, letting them file in. He’s grateful that they’re in the church now, because all of the other boys are either too respectful of the space and what it represents or too awkward in a silent building to make fun of Trevor for seeking out Honey. Or they don’t want to get on Bea’s bad side and act a fool in church and suffer her wrath.
They file into one of the back pews, Bea sandwiched between Quinn and Luke. Trevor sits on the other side, right at the aisle.
For an hour, he stays quiet and moves and speaks with the congregation. He counts the number of times that Cole tases Jack’s side, sticking his fingers between his ribs to cause him to flinch and make noise in the reverent area. He does this five times throughout the mass before Bea leans forward and threatens to cut his hands off herself.
For an hour, Trevor stares forward and lets his mind wander to Honey, and all the thoughts he has about her. She’s a mystery and she’s quiet like Quinn, but confident in a way that Quinn never achieved. She knows exactly who she is and won’t budge for anyone, won’t change herself or act in any special ways around certain people.
Trevor admires it– he’s spent his whole life performing for people, in a way. Hockey is his life and always has been, but sometimes it’s tiring to realize that all of his friends are people he met on ice. To think that he can be surrounded by his teammates and the fans in any arena and still feel lonely– it’s the kind of thing that leaves Trevor wondering if this career was a good idea.
In another world, he’s playing in a beer league in a town like this, with a girl like Honey on his arm.
The thought leaves him feeling heavy, weighed down. It ruminates in his mind, even after the service is over. It sours his mood completely and Trevor wishes he was back at the house so he could take a shower or something and stop the prickling feelings from taking over his skin.
In the parking lot, the group chats about nothing. Trevor doesn’t listen. Bea introduces the boys to come of the townsfolk and Trevor smiles and shakes the men’s hands, hugs the ladies or send a special look their way. Vera and Earl honk as they drive past the group, Vera blowing a kiss towards Trevor and Cole through the passenger window. Cole catches it and sticks it to his cheek, then sends one back. It makes Vera laugh.
Trevor tunes back into the conversation as the boys discuss plans for the upcoming week– Jack edges away from Trevor before he mentions that he invited Honey over that coming Friday and that Bea should come too.
“Well, you’ll rarely find a Honey without its Bea,” Bea teases. She claps. “Okay. I’ll see you guys then. Quinn, take me home?”
Quinn nods and puts his hand on the small of her back to direct her to the car. Bea pauses and waves Trevor over, shooing the other boys away. Quinn stays, his hand still on Bea’s body.
“There’s a fruit stand outside the grocery store on Mondays,” Bea says.
“I know, I’ve been,” Trevor interrupts.
Bea quiets him with a click of her tongue. She chooses her words carefully, her eyes hard. “Go tomorrow at, like, six,” she suggests, a faux-nonchalant shrug lifting her shoulders. “You might find something that you like there. I recommend buying the strawberries. They make a lovely gift, Trevor.”
Trevor frowns, confused. “I don’t like strawberries,” he replies.
Bea closes her eyes and processes his words for a moment, a tight smile on her lips. “They make a lovely gift, Trevor,” she repeats.
“Sick,” Trevor says, his voice hard. He doesn’t understand what she’s saying. “I’m not buying strawberries for you, Bea. I don’t know you enough to give you gifts.”
Bea stomps her foot. “Good fucking God, Trevor. Quinn, can you explain this shit to him?” She asks, then walks off to the car. She takes Quinn’s keys from his hand and gets behind the driver’s seat herself.
Quinn watches her walk away, then turns to Trevor. “She’s telling you that you’ll run into Honey, you fucking idiot, and that you should buy her strawberries.”
He leaves Trevor standing there, eyes wide.
Yeah, he’s definitely heading to the fruit stand tomorrow and buying strawberries.
He concocts his plan on the drive home, silent compared to the other three boys, that are laughing and flopping around the backseat with every turn in a game of Jell-O. They’re not wearing their seatbelts. When they get too loud, Trevor envisions ejecting them from the backseat, leaving them sailing down the mountain, falling through the air.
He holes himself up in his room to nap when they get home, too excited to see Honey to let the time pass organically. It’s like time travel, this way. Trevor will wake up and be two hours closer to seeing her, to getting another chance to win her over. This time, with a gift.
In the afternoon, he laces up his blades and skates with the boys. Quinn has come back by now, not spending much time at Bea’s apartment after church, according to Luke. They all skate and shoot for a couple of hours, playing a game of pickup with an extra player to sub in and out. When that ends, they run some drills. Luke and Quinn play defense, like always, with Trevor, Cole, and Jack recreating their legendary line from USNTDP. It works out perfectly, and each boy pushes himself like they’re playing a real game. It’s the brotherly competition that fuels them– and when the drills start to fall into disarray from hits and other penalties that would certainly be called out in a game, they head off to shower.
The night ends slowly, fizzling out compared to the way it ended the night before. The boys lounge in the game room, sprawling out on the couches and snacking and sipping their beer. Trevor isn’t made to perform another Zulu Run, no one picks up a pool cue, and they watch shitty TV movies on the Spanish channel instead of English. They make up the dialogue as they go and Trevor is the first to go to sleep. He makes it to midnight, but then he forces himself to go to bed.
He’s got a big day ahead of him… after 5 p.m., anyway.
–end–of–chapter–one–
#puck-luck's fics#andy writes anything🍄#small town girl x tz#trevor zegras#trevor zegras smut#trevor zegras fanfiction#quinn hughes#jack hughes#luke hughes#cole caufield#hockey smut#hockey romance
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Heyy! Could I request Jason x Child of Nyx! Reader, i'd figure it'd be a cool thing since you know Zeus and Nyx don't really like each other that and then their children fall in love.
You don't have to do it, if you don't want to and ps. I love all of your works! <3
okay so these have been sitting in my inbox since eons ago, so I decided I was gonna set myself a minimum of 0.4k words because I figured people would rather read a lil bit of their request rather then non of it, but I just churned out 1.2k words of this and I know more then the gods do about nocturnal animals.
enjoy <3
he was raised by wolves - Jason G x child of Nyx reader/animal lover

»»————- ★ ————-««
Jason dumped his teddy bear jacket on the back of the spinning chair, after he checked there were no hedgehogs eating plum offcuts on it. He’d made that mistake one too many times. There were a lot of miniscule holes in the sleeves of his jacket.
The medical kit he was looking for was most likely in one of the crates stacked beneath the snake table. The table with the snake tanks on it, obviously.
Your cabin was dark a lot of the time, when you weren’t there, courtesy of the kingdom of nocturnal animals lurking between books and in pillowcases, so Jason had to turn on a few of the antique lamps you’d found [on the side of the road, of course] so that other people could see.
He got to his knees, wincing at the crack he heard.
He could also hear a faint hissing. He looked into one of the tanks, and waved at Benjamin. Benjamin was a northern desert night snake. Meaning he looked like if a leopard wearing a choker was turned into a slithery little serpent. Jason was glad you’d passed that pet leopard you used to have onto Pollux and Castor. It got fur all over his clothes.
Benjamin just stuck his tongue out at him, and Jason crawled underneath the desk, looking for the first aid kit every cabin was supposed to have.
There was a pretty high chance you had chucked it out to make room for that little collection of shrinking green frogs you had found in a river by the Hecate cabin, deep in the woods so that when they accidentally cursed bloodlines and the like, no one was in imminent danger. Lou Ellen owed her first born to three different beings, but that was irrelevant.
He dug past a few boxes of sugar glider pellets, and found the first aid kit.
“JASON GRACE, SON OF A BITCH, CHILD OF ROME, CONSUL OF DEMIGODS, PRAETOR OF THE FIRST LEGION!”
Jason sat straight up. A thud echoed through the low lit little cabin, and his head began to pound. He’d hit it on the bottom of the snake table. He sniffed, “I said that once.”
He heard you trot over as he tried to extract himself, the back of his head throbbing painfully.
“Babe, we talked about this,” you fussed, and yanked him out into the open with the force of someone who took chocolate out of coyotes mouths on the daily. “You gotta stop banging your head! You’re getting that chronic pain from it that Will told you about!”
Jason grumbled about nothing, and squinted as he looked around. Your face was just a blob.
“You dropped your glasses babe, hear, lemme… wait, hold this,” you said, dumping your wrapped up hoodie into his arms, the one with the moon cycle phases on the back, and then crawling back underneath the snake table. “I’ve got em!”
He watched you slide them back onto his eyes, your hands actually very gentle compared to the yanking from before. He tried not to grin stupidly. The hoodie in his arms wriggled. Jason looked down, and a small spiky red face looked up at him with big shiny eyes.
“Uh…” he said.
You stood up with a huff, “I knew it, you’ve got a concussion. Now you’re slurring your speech!”
“...No, I just wasn’t expecting a fox,” Jason managed to squeak out, staring at the little animal. It was pretty cute. It reminded him of a wolf, but not the wolves he knew, more of a spindly wolf dipped in ketchup.
You paused, the first aid kit in your hands. “You weren’t? What did you think I was doing in the forest?”
“I don’t know,” Jason said, standing back up and moving to the squishy blanketed bed behind the humongous crystal ball and stack of telescopes. There were also a few cat playgrounds to weave around, but he managed to sink into your pile of bat shaped teddies and pillows. “Fighting monsters, near death experiences, something regular?”
You rolled your eyes, and sat cross legged on the bed, reaching for his head with those gentle hands that made him understand how you could pick up the deadliest of spiders and feralist of wolverines without even a scratch.
Jason wasn’t even nocturnal, but he did sink into your hold.
Then you let go to crack the unfrozen ice pack and let the chemicals take over until it would make the tips of your fingers freezing. Jason knew to expect your cold hands under his shirt, trying to freeze him out.
He was sort of used to it, though.
He looked around your cabin while you savagely whacked the poor icepack against one of the many thick framed mirrors lining your walls. A few bats flapped out of their hiding places in the rafters and settled back down. A baby puma hissed from its place by the umbrella stand that was actually just full of swords.
From the outside, your cabin looked like a tiny portion of a haunted mansion plonked between the Asteria cabin and the Hestia cabin, which was really just a cozy little room for anyone. Jason pet the soft head of the fox napping in his arms. On the inside, though, it was just old lamps and chew toys and even older mirrors. And a lot of poo bags. And record players. And Jason’s hoodies.
You were already wearing his teddy bear jacket, but he didn’t argue when you pressed the ice pack to his head.
“So, what were you really lookin for in there, babe?” you asked, taking back the fox. You held your hand out, and it disappeared into a shadow.
“Bandages.”
On the other side of the room, out of a shadow, you grabbed a ziploc bag of raspberries. You pulled it back and began feeding the little fox, red staining your cold fingertips.
“You know you can’t beat Beth, right?” you teased, looking up for a moment with those gorgeous eyes that made Jason’s head feel a little floaty. Or maybe it was just the injury.
You smirked, “I mean, not that it’s totally not hot when you beat the shit out of people or anything.”
Yep. Definitely just the head injury. Totally.
Jason ate a slightly squashed raspberry. “I know, but I wanted to practise. I was gonna find Will. Can’t remember how to wrap my wrists.”
You passed over the fox, who wiggled out of the hoodie and curled around a fruit bat Squishmellow with a yawn, fangs stained with red that may or may not be berries or blood.
Jason shuffled forwards on the bed, ice pack falling from his white blonde hair. “My turn?”
“I thought you were going to get the shit beaten out of you by Annabeth?” You said with a smirk. You had that shark tooth necklace on. Jason gave you a half hearted evil eye, and you opened your arms.
He flopped into the hug, pushing you both back onto the bed. A Tasmanian devil [how? You were in America!] and a grumpy looking white tailed deer and about seven different types of bush mice stared at you.
Jason didn’t care. He snuggled into your hug, chin on your chest. Your fingers ran through his hair.
He was your favorite feral animal.
»»————- ★ ————-««
#pjo fandom#pjo#heroes of olympus#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson#Jason grace#Jason grace pjo#Jason grace headcanons#Jason#Jason pjo#Jason grace x reader#Jason grace x y/n#jason grace x you#jason grace x male reader#Jason grace fluff#my stuff
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Toska
Part 3
Tos-Kah
Russian (noun)
An immense ache for nothing and everything all at once. An anguish from the bottom of the heart.
——
Brussel, Belgium.
The Past.
Snow fell like whispered secrets from the sky, blanketing the world in quiet wonder. You stood at the window, hands wrapped around a chipped ceramic mug, watching flakes swirl and dance with a kind of reckless grace of hot chocolate. What a boring day you thought.
You’ve been undercover for 1.5 years now, in fact you managed to get inside Konni Group. One hell of an operation as they say. The higher up thought that this operation was soup sandwich. It takes too much time and too much resources. But Laswell refused to back down and support the operation so here you are.
“Is that hot chocolate really that good? You’ve been staring at it for a while now.” his voice thick with russian accent broke the silence.
You look at him, his hair is kinda messy, he wear his favorite light blue shirt, he looked somehow tired, which is strange. Makarov is a smart, well calculated and cold man. He is the brain, practically borderline sociopath. At least that was your first impression of him. But now? He’s like different version when he is with you, attentive, well, he is kinda good at reading people anyway. He’s warm, he loves to listen to your ramblings. Not much of a talker. Basically a good lover. Sometimes you can’t believe how can a person have a very different side of personality. Not like a different side of a coin, more like a person who enjoy wearing different mask now and then. Like he can switch off his personality in a flick of a fingers.
“It is good, you want to try it?” Smiling, You offering your hot chocolate to him, knowing well he wont have it.
“I’m good my love.” He answer walking towards you. He stops right in front of you, his hand taking your mug and put it aside on the table.
“Did something happened?” You ask him worry because he just silently hugging you tight, like he’s afraid that you are going to disappear at any moment.
“You are going to stand by me forever yes? I don’t give a fuck about anyone else, but with you, it’s different my love.” His voice steady, you knew, this is not a request or his plead to you. This is an order. Your breath stop for a moment, a pang of sadness hitting your chest. You inhale his scent, your hands wrapped around his neck hugging him tight. I could kill him, right here, right now and finish the mission you thought.
“Of course, I’m not going anywhere. You have me now and forever.”
What a lie.
Breaking the hug, your eyes tracing his face line, drinking the sight of him. Your fingers curls into the fabric of his shirt holding on, not to keep him from going but to remember how it felt to have him close like this. You kiss his lips in a slow and in tenderness, there was no urgency. His hands holding your back, he deepened the kiss, you let him consume you.
——
Task force 141 Base
Interrogation Room
1920
“Fucking hell Laswell, you could’ve give me heads up about this!”
Have you ever got into trouble during school days and they made your parents go to the principal office and now you just sit there awkwardly while your mum and your day fighting about you and you got this guilty feelings but also denial at the same time? Yup, it feels like that now.
“Calm down, Boys. Listen all of you,” Laswell made her way to the table, putting several files related to the mission, “Sergeant Adler was involved in a highly classified undercover ops for CIA called Operation Black Water. The objective was to get hold of financial records called The Book related to Konni Group, follow the money and shut down their operation . Three agents assigned for this mission, Agent James White code name Bear, Agent Daniel Storm code name Badger, and Agent Adler code name Juliet.” Everyone looking at you now, you’re not sure whether its because the code name or because they finally hearing the truth. You just shrug your shoulders, let them judge you thought.
Laswell proceed to explain the details of the mission. You just nod your head here and there, not bothered to give additional details or comment related to it. You just want it all to end, you literally have no energy left now. But you noticed, Ghost is staring at you. He made no comment, only once he nod his head. You take a deep breath, trying to stay calm, you’re overstimulated now.
“Umm, Boss, can i go to the bathroom now? I really need to go.” You ask both Laswell and Price. When they give their permission, you just bolt yourself out from the interrogation room. Made your way to the bathroom nearby and basically throw up but nothing comes out.
Panic attack, right now? Wow great timing.
Your body is thinking way ahead of your brain now, maybe its because you’ve been trying so hard to keep it together, maybe its the flashbacks, maybe its the room. Who knows? Who cares?
You walk to the sink, trying to wash up your face. Then you feel a presence behind you and the moment you open your eyes, there he is. Ghost. Silently standing leaning to the wall watching you.
“Go away please, i will talk to you later, I promise.”
You pay no attention to him, because right now you’re trying so hard to maintain your breathing. Your ears ringing, your eyes cant even focus now, it’s all blurry. The room felt smaller, the walls closing in, your skin prickling with heat and cold at once. A surge of dread rose in your throat, thick and choking, even though you couldn’t name what you were afraid of.
Then you feel it, Ghost’s hand wrapped around waist turning your body facing him. You melted into his arms, and he pulled you close with the kind of tenderness that made the rest of the world disappear.
“Breath, slowly.” His words are quiet. "Breath."
Ghost hands settled gently on your back, anchoring you, pulling you back to the reality. No words passed between you and Ghost—just the hush of shared breath, the steady beat of his heart beneath your ear. In his embrace, you found warmth, safety, and something deeper: the quiet promise that he was yours , and you are home. Finally.
“Comeback to me Adler.”
to be continued
A/n: thank you for waiting for the update guys, life been getting quite busy. Also what kind of ending we shall have? Happy or angst ? Also let me know if anyone wants to get tagged
Tag list :
@bimboreader @quiet-loser @niazurzolo @rafaelacallinybbay @meepcow @letaliabane
#call of duty modern warfare#call of duty x reader#cod x reader#ghost x reader#john price x reader#makarov x reader#simon riley x reader#vladimir makarov#kate laswell
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peter is so fine i just know guys hit on him too like… everyone wants him
in my head he directs every hot guy that flirts with him to ethan & sets him up with hot guys
oh also, i can see him being like ‘no this guys way better’ when ethan goes up to someone at a party djdjdjs
yes but peter is a bit more dumb when it comes to guys flirting with him.
'hey.'
peter's chin rises as an acknowledgement. 'hey, man.' he throws back the rest of his beer, he misses the way his mouth is watched when it wraps around the bottle, and the heavy eyes on his shoulders when he leans on the counter.
'is this your frat?' peter reaches for another beer, he offers one to the guy next to him, their fingers brush, peter says nothing about it. 'yeah, all three years. are you in a house?'
he shakes his head, 'nah. not my thing, most guys in them aren't so, ah.. tolerating, you know?' peter shrugs, 'yeah, sure, man. sig is pretty cool, it's pretty tolerable.'
the guy laughs, a little too hard, his elbow bounces off peter's arm. his hand sticks out, 'eric, nice to meet you.' peter holds out his own, he's expecting a firm grip but eric is delicate. 'parker.'
'what are you majoring in, parker?' it feels like they're holding hands, it's gone on a little too long. peter pulls away first, eric bites back a smile. 'uh, physics.'
'ooh, you're smart, aren't you? that's a bit of a curveball.' peter feels a little insulted. 'are you saying that because i'm in a frat? what, that means i can't be smart? tell me, what's your major, communications?'
eric raises his hands, 'easy, tiger.' peter blinks, he thinks of you for a second. 'i just meant i didn't expect you to be a nerd under... all that.' eric tucks the corner of his bottom lip into his mouth, peter takes a small step back, he feels like he's being observed.
'graphic design, by the way. you know what, you're really handsome, i could do a quick sketch for you.' peter feels a spark, it's not everyday another guy calls him handsome.
'hey, man. you're handsome, too.' peter's had a few beers, he misses the way eric's eyes light up. peter slides a napkin over, he tears open a drawer, a pen produced.
'alright, how do you want me to pose?'
'hm, naked?' peter finds him funny, 'yeah, let me just whip it out in front of the crowd.' eric starts the scribbles, a rough outline at first. 'or we could take it to your room?'
peter pauses, eric is detailing his lips, he never knew they could look so luscious on a napkin drawing. 'what's in my room?' eric initials the sketch, it's wildly detailed for being done in a minute.
'your dick? preferably in my mouth?'
peter drops his mouth open, his hands wave back and forth. 'no! i'm so sorry, but no! i have like, a girlfriend. not gay, i mean, i love them- you- fuck, you know what i mean, but i'm not one. a gay person, i mean. but my best friend is half gay and he's really cool, like, cooler than me and the gay thing is only like a fraction why.'
eric looks off to the side, peter grabs his shoulders. 'dude, this happens to me all the time. it's no big deal, but you know who is? ethan. he's super into plants, it's like his whole thing. you like me so you'll like him. trust.'
'alright, i'll meet your friend.' peter cheers and tugs him out the kitchen by his arm, 'i promise you, dude. dick sucking will happen tonight, you're welcome.'
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June Fic Recs
It's been a while since I put one of these together! Under the cut are a selection of great spirk, mckirk, spones, and mcspirk fics I've read in the past few months with a brief description of what I liked about them. Enjoy!
SPIRK
Tomorrow’s Circus by Borealisblue. TOS. Explicit, 56,084 words (as of 6/20/24). Work in progress. Circus au, 1930s, everyone’s human. The friends-to-lovers and pining in this is SO GOOD and I really think that everyone needs to be reading this fic. I haven’t been this invested in a fic in a long time; getting that subscription email letting me know this fic has updated can literally fix me when I’m having a bad day. Cannot rec this fic enough if you’re in the mood for a slowburn, plus the art in it is phenomenal.
A Perfect Fit by ThereBeWhalesHere. TOS. Teen and Up Audiences, 7,097 words. Role swap: Captain Spock and First Officer Kirk. Spock’s POV, admittance of feelings, first kiss. This fic is so lovely, I love a fic where I get to just watch these two get to know each other and fall in love.
Time After Time by spaceisgay (ChancellorGriffin). SNW and Disco. Explicit, 138,921 words. I loved this fic. The pining and sexual tension is so good, and this fic has a good balance of humorous fluffy scenes and angst and incredibly hot smut. It’s a spirk fic, yes, but it really dives into sibling dynamics as it explores the Kirk brothers’ relationship as Spock continues to process the Michael-shaped hole in his life. I love this take on this era’s Spock, there’s so much he doesn’t know about himself yet. I also really adore how this fic writes all the characters—you really get a sense of everyone’s personalities in this fic, the entire crew feels so ALIVE. Just fantastic characterizations of everyone!
Big Me (But It's You I Fell Into) by waketosleep. AOS. Mature, 38,728 words. This is the fic that got me to care about golf. I wish I was kidding—now I join my in-laws when they’re watching it on the TV. This fic has a scene between McCoy and Kirk during Kirk’s first tournament with him that had me laughing my ass off. Never not thinking about this fic; the dangerous part about reading a sports au is suddenly you care about that sport. Don’t think it can happen to you? Give this fic a try.
Consume by the_moonmoth. AOS. Explicit, 1,139 words. Must be logged in to read. Very hot smut. Dirty talk, mind melds, Bottom!Kirk and Top!Spock. This fic just hits.
You Could Call It Love by lurikko. TOS. Mature, 45,791 words. Fake marriage, slowburn, getting together. This fic is SO good, just a whole bunch of tropes that I adore.
SPONES
That Which Lingers by stanzas. TOS Movies. Teen and Up Audiences, 1,008 words. Takes place after The Search for Spock. Established relationship with some very sweet moments as they deal with the lingering side effects of the fal-tor-pan. This fic is just everything to me, it absolutely melted my heart.
So Hold Me Close and Say Three Words by Rusoe. TOS. Mature, 1,103 words. Omegaverse. Nesting, Omega!McCoy and Alpha!Spock. I absolutely wasn’t expecting this fic to dive into insecurities about aging when I clicked on it. Loved this!
Stop Making Sense by therev. TOS. General Audiences, 13,775 words. Spock is severely injured as a result of a decision McCoy had to make in order to save the lives of others. McCoy carries a lot of guilt over his actions, even as Spock recovers from his injuries. Very good.
it’s all downhill from here by strangenewwords. AOS. Teen and Up Audiences, 2,082 words. McCoy takes Joanna sledding. Joanna gets overtired, and McCoy gets overwhelmed and panicky. Love this fic’s take on Dad!McCoy, and the spones in this is so damn sweet.
MCKIRK
and i can lend you broken parts that might fit (like this) by jeyhawk. AOS. Explicit, 17,461 words. Academy era, first they hookup, then get to know each other, and then their relationship grows from there. I’m a sucker for fics with this setup.
Resistless is your charm by fangirlandiknowit. AOS. Explicit, 6,031 words. After hearing about Uhura’s awful first date with Kirk, McCoy decides to text him. Includes some mini-golfing and a very good car hookup scene. Loved this.
MCSPIRK
Tex-Mex Eggrolls and Spinach Dip by Ncc1701ohno. TOS. Explicit, 3,746 words. Smut, light bondage. The setup for this fic is that Spock, McCoy, and Kirk find themselves stuck in the 21st century and work at the Cheesecake Factory in order to make ends meet. I desperately want this fic to become a multi-part series, because the concept is endlessly amusing to me (which is pretty obvious since I partially inspired the idea). A very funny and very hot fic.
Everything That Disappears by sagesiren. AOS. Mature, 19,748 words. Academy era, kid fic, Trans!McCoy, fluff and emotional hurt/comfort. Absolutely loved this, McCoy being a single dad is everything to me. A very entertaining get-together fic for the three of them while exploring parenthood and being trans.
Approximation by liadan14. AOS. Explicit, 15,167 words. Mutual pining, hot smut, and a really interesting plot told non-chronologically. I especially enjoyed Spock’s characterization in this fic, but I love how all three of them are written!
#star trek#star trek tos#star trek aos#star trek strange new worlds#snw#spirk#k/s#kirk/spock#spones#spock/mccoy#mckirk#kirk/mccoy#mcspirk#the triumvirate#kirk/spock/mccoy#james t kirk#leonard mccoy#spock#fic rec#phebs speaks#phebs writes fic
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Could I request a blurb or one-shot for Matt? We all know how he loves fishnets and thigh high socks and I'm sure that he wouldn't be able to stay focus if his cute assistant/merch girl was wearing a pair. He would just be totally mesmerized by how good your thighs look before taking you back to the hotel room and having his way with you (consensually of course). I'm also 100% the guys would tease him about it too. (I'm having some THOTS cuz there's no way he isn't a thigh/ass guy if he likes fishnets and thigh highs that much). 🤭
More fishnets, different scenario. I love it. This one is for the Matt girlies 😏🤭
Thigh Highs and Fishnets

Tag list: @philomenie @supersquirrel1996 @foliosgirl @angelmarie89 @fadingintothegrey @theanarchymuse95 @thisbicc @lma1986 @dominuslunae @shayzillaaaa @fadingintothegrey @an0mallly @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @mrsnoahsebastian @flowery-mess @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @stardustsirenmelody @romanreigns-supreme @anything-more-than-human @into-the-grey @rumoured-whispers @myownthoughts12 @sister-sebastian

Thigh high rainbow socks that stopped a mere three inches from the bottom of the daisy duke cut-offs made Matt's jaw hit the floor.
Never, in his life, did he think he'd have a sometimes assistant, sometimes merch girl working for him as hot as you. Unknowingly you teased him whenever you wore them or your fishnets.
He couldn't think right, watching your lusciously, thick, round ass move in those shorts. The bright colors of the rainbow socks only brought more attention to your thighs that he pictured himself between and slipping his hands down the inside of those socks, gripping the thickness of your thighs as he pushed your legs apart, spreading you open for the pleasure of his eyes alone.
"Matt!"
"Fuck! Don't yell!"
"Then answer me, dude!" Folio exclaimed.
"Answer what?"
Folio sighed, rolling his eyes. "You're ridiculous, man. Just ask her out already."
"Hell, no!" Matt cried a little too loudly, earning him a surprised look from you. He felt his cheeks heating up and knew for sure he was blushing.
"Awe look at sweet little Matt's cheek's heating up!" Jolly cried.
"Someone is blushing," Nicholas laughed.
At the end of the night, Matt was so worked up over you it wasn't even funny anymore. Once he packed up the equipment and handed it off to the crew, he marched right over to you, grabbed you by the arm, pulled you outside and around the side of the building where you two could be alone.
Noah just walked up to him, grinned, and caressed his cheek, making Matt seethe with frustration.
"Fuck all of you," he groaned, walking off. But you caught his eye as he stormed passed you, and you caught his smile.
He pushed you up against the brick wall, blocking you in with his arms stretched out beside you. His dark stare beating down, so intensely, so possessively, made you clench your thighs together, as you felt your arousal soak your panties.
Matt noticed, releasing a feral groan, and pressed his body firmly against yours while slipping his hand behind your neck and pulling you in for a heated kiss. The proof of how hard he was for you was pressed against your abdomen.
Matt kept his hands planted firmly on your ass, consistently pushing you into him just so he could feel the way your pussy hit the tip of his length, making him grunt and groan as he kissed you. "Really," he said in surprise as you attacked his lips, pulling his shirt off of him.
You pulled off his ball cap, dropping it to the ground so that your hands could tangle themselves in his beautiful, dirty blond hair. Time seemed to stop for you both as you stayed in the alleyway, making out like two teenage kids.
The door to your hotel room slammed shut after you hung the "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door handle. Matt grabbed you from behind, slipping his hands down your thigh high socks, just like he envisioned, pulling you back against him and rutting his aching cock against your ass.
"I need to fuck you so badly, you have no idea," he whined into the back of your neck as you giggled.
"Mmm, that sounds like a really good idea," you admitted, turning around to face him.
"Really," walking him back toward the bed as he removed your shirt and bra too.
He didn't even bother to remove your thigh high socks before stripping you both down the rest of the way and entering you like a starved animal. Matt promised romance later, but right now, he just wanted to fuck you until you couldn't think straight.
And that's just what he did. Your legs rested against Matt's shoulders as he pinned your hands to the bed while fucking up into you so hard, you could feel him hit your cervix with each deep thrust. Your choked back sobs. became moans and cries in between Matt's feral groans and grunts.
Matt had you riding him in just a matter of minutes. His gripped the rainbow fabric covering your thighs, enjoying the view he was getting while beneath you.
"Fuck is right, beautiful," he smiled running his hand down the front of you, over your breasts, then down to your soaking wet clit. His fingers were instantly covered in your arousal as he massaged rapid circles against your clit, watching you get off on him in the hottest way.
"You like this baby, being in control, riding my cock so well?"
Matt dug his nails deep into your thighs, making you cry out his name.
"Come on, I know you can be louder than that, baby. I want all the people on this floor to hear you scream."
"Fuck, Matty," you moaned, throwing your head back.
"Ok, fuck, beautiful, fuck. I'm gonna cum!" Matt cried, squeezing your hip. It was just what you needed to bring you over the edge, too. Your screams of passion filled the room as Matt's warm seed filled your insides. He sat up, clinging to you and smothering his face in the comfort of your breasts. You kissed his forehead, sweetly wrapping him against you as you both waited for your bodies to come down.
"Oh God, don't get me started on fishnets," he groaned then laughed.
"From now on, you're wearing those fucking socks every time we have sex," Matt chuckled, slipping his shirt on and pulling it down. "Or fishnets," you added, zipping up your combat boots.
"So, this isn't a one time thing?" you asked, kissing Matt's lips. He looked down at you with all seriousness.
"Fuck, no. You're mine now."
He was serious and the possessiveness that rolled off his tongue made your insides flutter.
"Why me?"
"Because everyone has an addiction, mine just happens to be you in thigh highs and fishnets. Come at me wearing either of those, and I'm all fucking yours, baby," Matt confessed, holding to hotel room door opened for you.
"Oh, just wait for tonight, then," you teased, walking out the door.
Matt's mouth fell open and his eyes widened.
"Wait, What?"
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“Got You”
Jey Uso x IndigenousFMC
8 chapters- 22k words
🚨It’s so smutty I’m so sorry - no one under 18 plz!

🚨 second alarm, there is a triggering scene but it is an attempted assault that is interrupted - there is a note around it so it is easy to skip!
Just collecting all 4 parts into one loooong post. It’s unedited so I apologize for mistakes and timelines messiness
Summary: Rori Begay is Jey Uso’s nanny. Inappropriate feelings begin to brew between them over lockdown and they try to avoid it. Unfortunately the violence in Rori’s home life boils over and so do their feelings for each other when he comes to her rescue.
Chapter 1:
Aurora POV
“My Rori’s here!” Jason lunged from his father’s arms into mine as soon as I made it through the door of the unassuming but well kept blue house.
“Hey little dude!” I gladly received the three year old, doing my best to avoid touching Josh too much in doing so. Every time we so much as brushed hands it caused a rolling wave of butterflies and warmth. Not unpleasant but also not an appropriate thing to feel for someone who was technically my boss. And the last thing I needed in my life right now was to lose my job, especially over a stupid crush.
Due to the pandemic ramping up Josh was home from his job that normally demanded a lot of travel. Even though he wasn’t traveling he still had commitments and a job that required several hours of training daily in the gym on top of meetings and zoom calls. He’d explained the plan his company had until they could safely begin touring again, a plan that would see them staying here in Florida for several months to a year.
Long enough for me to save up enough to get out of my own place, even if my mother was demanding a high rent. I was glad I’d fibbed about just how much Josh was paying me weekly or she would have demanded even more.
“Swim! Swim! Wanna go swimming!” I juggled the excited toddler in my arms trying not to drop my day bag.
Coming to the rescue Josh grabbed the green backpack and smiled at me in a way that turned my insides to mush. “We gotta eat first little man.”
“Are you free today?” I hoped I didn’t sound as excited as I felt. At first I’d found it odd he still wanted me there even when he wasn’t going to be busy for the day but quickly started to look forward to spending time with both of them.
“Yeah, my meetings were cancelled. I was thinking I’d join y’all for swimming lessons and whatever else you got planned. If that’s cool with you.”
As if I was going to say no.
I looked at Jason with a grin. “Whaddya think? Want Daddy to hang out with us today?”
“Hang out with daddy AND Rori! Swim!”
“What about you?” It was hard not to read too much into his expression or the way his voice seemed to drop a little. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
Oh, of course. He’s trying to be considerate of my feelings as a person and I’m drooling at the way his voice changes when he is speaking to another adult. I swallowed my embarrassment and put on a big grin. “Not at all, it’ll be great to hangout! Now how about some breakfast?”
There wasn’t much Jason loved more than swimming but one thing was for certain.
“PANCAKES!”
—-
Jey POV
It did things to me when she called me “Daddy”, even if it was in this context.
Maybe I could get Joe or Braun to hit me in the head next time we’re wrestling.
Really, really hard.
Well, maybe not Braun, I didn’t want to die after all.
I needed some sense knocked back into me around this girl though. I can’t keep my eyes off her and thought about her way too often. She’s only eighteen and I should not be feeling this way about my sons *nanny.* Watching her as she moved around the kitchen, letting little man help her with making breakfast it brought an excited sense of peace.
My eyes dutifully followed the sway of her curvy bottom as she sidestepped small feet with a laugh. I wanted to wind my hands into that waist length brunette hair while I devoured her pouty lips.
Wanted to see her pretty green eyes tear up with those lips wrapped around my dick.
I wanted a lot of things from Miss Aurora Begay.
Isolating was hard, I hadn’t had a chance to go out or hookup with a chick since New Year’s Eve. Maybe that was my problem. She was close, pretty and had a great laugh.
But the truth was I hadn’t wanted someone so bad in a long time. Jason’s mom had burned me pretty hard when she decided she didn’t want to be invested in his life, or mine.
You travel too much she’d said. Come to find out “you travel too much” really meant I’d rather be fucking other dudes in another country.
More power to her. We’d started out casual but when she fell pregnant I’d stepped up and even offered to marry her and let myself get invested. Not the best way to start but I was willing to give it a shot for him.
“How many?”
“Huh?”
Rori pulled me out of my thoughts with a light tough to my shoulder and a giggle. She smiled down at me. “I asked you how many pancakes would you like? I’m using the protein mix.”
Of course she’d ferreted out the healthiest pancakes for someone with my training regime. She was always doing thoughtful shit like that and I loved it. Loved that she would modify things for me, make me a plate or keep one warm for me in the oven when something ran longer than planned.
It was hard not to let all that spill.
She raised her eyebrows. “Josh?”
I’m so fucked.
“Uh, make it four.”
Thirty minutes later and I’m waiting for them the come downstairs. Jason appeared at the top of the steps first in his matching swimming trunks and shirt all decked out with tiger sharks. His favorite animal at the moment. He proudly held up his shark goggles. “Look daddy, I’m a shark!”
In a weird way I was grateful for the lockdown. I’d never been able to spend so much time with him and it made me happier than I’d ever been. “I see little man! Where’s Rori?”
“Coming, sorry!”
Chapter 2 -
Aurora POV
Josh stood at the bottom of the steps in nothing but black swimming trunks. My mouth went dry and heart pounded as I tried not to stare at him while Jason and I made our way downstairs hand in hand. It was tough though, his dark bronze skin and spiraling tattoos were mesmerizing.
He’d given me a cursory glance before looking away and even though I’m not terribly vain, it stung my pride a little. I should be ashamed that I picked the cheap and simple but pretty blue mesh halter and boy short set because I thought be would like it. As if he’d ever look at me the same way I do him.
Tucking the sadness away I padded out to the pool with Jason who was already fighting with his arm floats before he’d made it to the water. “Here let me help-“
The words were cut off by splash of water, my own shriek of surprise and Jason’s shriek of laughter. Josh had blown by us to canon ball into the water before surfacing with a challenging smirk.
It would be hard to ignore the heat pooling between my legs.
Well, until little man threw his arms up and demanded to be thrown in for a big splash that is. Happy to oblige and to cool off I scooped him up and we jumped in. What I’d planned as a swimming lesson turned into lots of laughing and splashing with Jason getting brave enough to paddle back and forth between us a few times.
After a while he was tired and become more preoccupied with making his pool toy shark eat his other action figures. Josh drifted over to where I stood in the shallow water while Jason played nearby on the step. “Hey.”
“Hey?”
“What happened here?” Gently he brought his fingers to a healing bruise on my arm. Anxiety twisted my stomach painfully. I had to come up with something, my mother had trained me to lie about this sort of thing.
“Oh, uh, I just, I just dropped something when I was reaching for a can on a shelf at home. Clumsy, just brought my arm up so it wouldn’t like hit me on the face or anything. Nothing, no worries.” I realized I was rambling when his brow furrowed and he narrowed his eyes.
Fuck. He didn’t need to know mom’s latest boyfriend was a real dick, even for her.
“A can huh?”
The truth was I hadn’t moved fast enough to get out of his way a couple days ago and so he grabbed me by the arm, hard enough to leave those prints, shook me and slung me across the room. Not the first time one of the men she’d brought home had done something similar but no one had ever really paid attention and my mom had threatened me with much worse if I ever told.
“Yeah, just a stupid accident.” I tried to smile reassuringly but could tell it wasn’t working. Josh opened his mouth but fortunately for me, little man chose then to pounce, throwing himself at us with abandon only a happy toddler could achieve.
“Make splashes Rori!”
“You sure did! How about we get dried off and go watch a movie?” I was grateful for the distraction. Hopefully he would let it go.
—-
Jey POV
Late that night I laid in bed scrolling through photos from the last few weeks, looking for clues and wracking my brain for an explanation. Aurora had never lied to me before and I should have her drug tested if she thought I bought that story about the can. I know what a bruise from someone gripping you too tightly looks like. Why was she being so evasive about it?
*Does she have a boyfriend? Some little shit who thinks he’s tough?*
An intense anger erupted in my chest at the thought of anyone putting their hands on her. In any way. Thinking about her kissing someone else, *fucking* someone else, made me physically sick.
I resolved to get the the bottom of it. Why weren’t her parents doing anything about it? Did they notice?
Wait. Does she live with them?
It dawned on me that I know next to nothing about her or her living situation. Most of our conversations revolve around Jason or the chores or how my day had been or what I wanted for dinner. I knew she was a college student and we’d chatted about a few times about things like music or movies or my job but never had she mentioned her family or friends or relationships at all, except one girl named Jamie. And all I knew about her was that they’d seen a movie together recently.
I’d snapped a few pictures today. Only one of just her but that was the one I settled on looking at. She stood mid thigh in the pool, her golden skin wet and the red of her messy bun stood out in the sunlight. The swimsuit wasn’t too revealing but I’d almost embarrassed myself. Seeing her coming down the steps it that simple but sexy outfit had me at half mast in no time, I’d had no choice but to hustle my ass into the cold pool or risk her noticing.
Looking at the picture now I had the same problem, my cock twitching to life at the thought of tasting her everywhere. Closing my eyes I dropped my phone and let myself pull my boxers down. Picturing her sweet smile I imagined she was there with me, straddling my waist, her walls clenched tightly around me.
Slowly I started stroking myself, imaginary Aurora’s movements were careful and shy and gentle, just like everything else about her. Her small hands braced against my chest, fingers digging in as her cheeks flushed with pleasure and she panted in need.
*”Daddy, please.”*
Increasing my pace I imagined taking control, clutching her hips and bracing myself with my ankles as I thrust up at a much more aggressive pace. My knees drew up and I clutched the sheet with my free hand as her cries filled my ears.
*”Harder Daddy, yes yes! I’m gonna cum!”*
I didn’t fight the groan that rose in my throat as I sped up even more. It was my fantasy and we would finish together.
“Fuck Rori, baby…” I bit my lip when I came, spilling hot ropes of cum onto my stomach as my hips bucked and twitched. For a few seconds I lay there panting.
I’d lost count of how many times I’d gotten off this exact same way now. I knew I should stop but it was becoming something of an obsession. It wouldn’t be the first time in my life I’d developed a fixation, just not quite so focused in on a particular female before.
I hoped it would pass when the lockdowns lifted and I could go out again but deep inside I knew that wouldn’t be the case.
No, something about those big hazel eyes and loving personality had dug itself deep inside me. I swiped at the mess I’d made with my shirt before throwing it in the hamper in the corner of the room. A twisted part of me hoped she’d notice when she did laundry and wonder if I was thinking about her but the realistic part of me would kick in and handle the mess in the morning.
Settling in to the covers I hoped she was comfortable and safe, wherever she was.
Chapter 3
Aurora POV -
I didn’t mind biking the thirty minutes from the trailer park where I lived to the nice suburb. Being alone with my music and a direction was meditative. This morning however it wasn’t as nice as usual. Unable to stand for leverage I was moving slower than usual, my injured right side making the whole process more difficult.
Janine’s latest catch, ‘Paul’, was becoming increasingly violent. I did my best to stay out of his way but the two bedroom single wide trailer was tiny, cramped and rundown. Most of my time at home was spent locked up in my bedroom, venturing out only to fix everyone dinner or use the restroom.
Not long now and I would be able to afford a deposit for a room somewhere. I let daydreams of the day I left that place forever fuel me through the pain in my ribs and ankle. I’d gotten distracted, inadvertently letting the dinner pot boil over. Paul took offense and sent me to the floor with a nasty shove before a swift kick to the ribs. I’d scrambled to my feet and limped to my room, slamming the door shut and locking it behind me. A fresh wave of anxiety shuddered through me.
I planned to ask Josh today if he would show me a few things I could do to be stronger and defend myself better. It might rouse his suspicions but I was just going to tell him a half truth, I wanted to be safe when I returned to campus someday. That was a safe and believable excuse in my mind.
Taking a deep breath I tried to force myself to walk normally in spite of the sharp pain that came with each step. Maybe I was naive to think I could disguise my injuries but I was going to try.
Answering the door rather quickly he welcomed me in and our day progressed as usual. Fortunately for me Josh had to tend to those cancelled meetings and would be busy until lunch time. I thought I had it under control with some Tylenol but was proven wrong.
Jason wanted a specific shark cup and plate set that was stored on a high shelf. Normally pulling out the little step stool and grabbing those things wouldn’t have been an issue.
Normally.
When I tried to put weight on that right ankle it gave and I yelped, falling backwards fully expecting to land hard on the kitchen tile.
Instead a strong pair of arms encircled my middle and I made contact with a hard, warm chest instead of cold, unforgiving floor. The pressure on my ribs hurt and I gasped, clutching at Josh’s forearms.
“Rori!” Jason’s alarmed voice hit my ears and I immediately tried to right myself and go to him but struggling against the hold hurt too much.
“It’s okay kiddo, I got her. Where are you hurt? Other than your foot?”
“Ribs.” It hurt to take in a breath to speak.
Nodding he maneuvered one arm under my knees and one under my shoulders, easily hefting me up into his arms. “I got you.”
I wanted to curl into a ball and never look at him again, this was too embarrassing. Settling me in a chair at the kitchen table he took a very clinical approach to examining my ankle and ribs. If I hadn’t been so upset the feeling of his fingers dancing on my rib cage would have made me dizzy. He let me catch my breath before asking the dreaded question.
“What happened Rori?” Josh sounded calm and collected as he went to retrieve an ice pack. Passing it to me he set about fixing lunch while waiting patiently for an answer.
“I tripped walking up my steps last night and fell. Nothing major, just some bruises.”
“You’re lucky they’re not broken.” My stomach dropped. It sounded like he was scolding me.
“Rori okay?”
“Yeah little man, I’m all good! Just an accident, no big deal!” I raised my hands in the air and smiled at Jason who looked relieved before going back to playing with his toys.
Josh set lunch on the table, ravioli, before collecting the little boy and depositing him in his booster seat next to me. Sitting down on my other side all of his moments were stiff. “You wouldn’t lie to me would you?”
My palms went sweaty and my heart pounded. I hoped my panic didn’t show on my face. Not trusting my voice I shook my head no and stuffed a piece of pasta in my mouth, making a pleased sound. I swallowed the food and the emotion all in one go. “No. I’m so sorry. It shouldn’t stop me from what I need to do again.”
“It’s fine. You rode your bike here yeah?”
I nodded and shoveled another bite in my mouth to avoid talking.
“Me and Jason are gonna drive you home this afternoon, once my meetings are done.”
A fresh wave of panic rolled through me. “No-no, please you don’t have to do that.”
“You’re in no shape to be riding your bike anywhere.” His voice was so cold. It made me want to cry.
“I don’t want to be a pain. I can ride the bus-“
Jason and I both jumped when Josh slapped the table. He seemed to catch himself before slamming it with full force but still made a loud noise. Quickly he looked at his son with a grin to ease any fear the little boy had.
But when he turned to me I could see it didn’t reach his eyes. His expression flattened out and it was like he was reigning himself back in.
I squeezed my thighs together as a confusing rush of emotions hit me. Fear of the consequences since I’d angered him and a strange flash of arousal that felt out of place but there it was all the same.
“Don’t argue with me.”
“Yes sir.”
—
Jey POV
Sitting through these afternoon meetings around the new Bloodline merchandise was torture. I’d never been a fan of this side of the job anyway and whatever was going on with Aurora was eating at me. Had I been a little bit of a bully and let my anger win for a minute? Absolutely but it will get me what I want which is some more information.
I was pretty sure someone was hurting her at home or she had a boyfriend. Thinking through my options I texted my twin who was also on the zoom call looking like he’d rather eat a shoe than look at yet another piece of concept art.
‘**Can yall take little man this weekend?**
I watched him respond on the call.
**’Yeah, you got something to do?’**
**Yeah**
It wasn’t often that I hid things from Jon but he didn’t need to know I was planning on essentially stalking my barely legal nanny for a couple of days. I sure as hell didn’t want to see Trinity’s face if she found out. But I had to know what was going on and figure out how to help her.
As of right now my plan was little more than to storm in, beat the ever living shit out of whoever I needed to, sweep her up and move her into my home and bed permanently. Far from foolproof but it was a work progress.
Finally the meeting came to a close. Heading downstairs I took a few deep breaths to make sure I had my temper fully back under control. It had been hard not to shake her by the shoulders and demand she tell me the truth so I’d settled on slapping the table for emphasis. I’d instantly felt like a jerk when both Jason and Aurora jumped in fear but we’d recovered.
The sounds of their laughter came from the kitchen, she was letting Jason ‘help’ her make pizza for dinner. Looked more to me like she was chasing the veggies he threw every which direction except at the dough in front of him but I enjoyed watching them together all the same. She genuinely seemed to enjoy spending time with him and he loved her already, taking to calling her “my Rori”. Clearing my throat to announce my presence I felt a stab of regret when anxiety fell over her face and she quieted instantly. Jason on the other hand clambered down from the step stool and rushed over, arms outstretched.
“Daddy! Look, making pizzas!” He waved excitedly towards where Rori leaned against the counter next to the bowls of ingredients. I tried to smile reassuringly at her but she just ducked her head, hiding her face with her hair.
“Nice, want some extra help Rori?” Jason was already trying to get down and back into the mix so I let him. It wasn’t the nicest thing, forcing her to talk to me, but she’ll learn to speak up for herself in time.
She would have to as my woman. I don’t know exactly when I decided that was going to happen but here we are.
Finally glancing up at me she bit her lip nervously. “Yes sir.”
An image of her doing that while on her knees in front of me flashed through my mind. I liked that a little too much, liked this oddly submissive behavior. It told me a lot to, her response to my anger. Fawning is what they call it, if I recalled the therapist correctly.
I stepped into her space deliberately, causing her to shy away from my hand. Persisting I gently caught her chin with my thumb and forefinger making her eyes go wide. Tempting as it was to push further and run my thumb over her abused lip I settled for making her look at me.
“M’sorry I scared you earlier.”
She blinked, her eyebrows drawing together in confusion. “You’re what?”
I snorted. “Girl I’m tryin to apologize to you. Pay attention.”
To her credit she recovered quickly. “I’m sorry, I am. I - it’s okay. Let’s get these pizzas in the oven.”
She pulled away but before I saw her pulse pounding in her neck and her eyes dilate. It was obvious she was into what I was doing. Perfect.
A little over an hour later found us loading up her bike into the back of my truck and heading down the highway. It never ceased to amaze me what being on either side of the highway could look like. Some trailer parks were nice with well kept homes, flowers and friendly neighbors. Some were like ‘Martin’s Cove’ complete with meth trailers, cars on blocks and folks toting guns in the waist bands of their jeans. I bristled at the thought of leaving her here but dutifully got out to retrieve her bike once we’d pulled up to #37.
An ugly white man stood on the porch with a stupid look on his face. I hated him. Rori’s face showed a flicker of fear when her eyes landed on him and I wanted to kill him. I had a feeling I knew who was leaving the bruises. I held onto her bike when she went to take it from me.
“Uh, Josh? I got it. Thank you so much again.” I could feel my blood pounding in my ears. The man hadn’t spoken but hadn’t looked away from Aurora either.
“Promise to call if you ever need help.” She tilted her head but must have remembered earlier today.
“Okay, I promise.”
I nodded. “I’ll pull up at eight.”
It made me physically sick to let her walk away but I did it. Once they’d both gone inside I pulled away. Jason fell asleep before we made it home so I got him tucked into bed and set about putting a bag together for his stay at his aunt and uncles this weekend.
I was too worried to sleep well, knowing full well she could be in trouble. Instead I found myself praying whatever gods or ancestors might be listening. The morning couldn’t come soon enough.
Chapter 4
Aurora POV
I stood on the embarrassingly cluttered porch the following morning at 7:30 A.M. Janine and Paul were still in bed. Much to my surprise they hadn’t questioned me in depth, instead disappearing into her room after I made their dinner. I checked the calendar, it was the third.
Ah, her disability check had come in. They’d be flush with drugs for a couple days.
Great, that usually meant they’d leave me alone. And they had. Looking back at the front door yet again, it felt as if it were going to open and swallow me. That’s how it felt to walk into this house, like I was being eaten by a beast snd may never claw my way out.
Turning back I settled on the steps, flipping through my music. “Dirty Thoughts” started playing and I felt a flush start up my neck remembering what I’d done listening to this song last night. After securing my door that lacked a proper lock I’d lain in bed playing my interactions with Josh over in my head. Mostly the feeling of his thick arms and hard chest and calloused hands.
Only a few times, mostly due to lack of privacy, did I indulge the growing heat between my legs. Thinking about Josh had made the throbbing ache there unbearable and when I slid my fingers below the elastic waistband of my underwear I found myself soaked. While still very much a virgin I’d read enough romance novels to know what my body wanted from him. My heart and mind did too but they were a lot harder to make happy.
Carefully I’d started to feel myself, fingers dipping into my wet slit to awkwardly circle my clit while my other hand cupped a breast, lightly playing over a sensitive nipple. My inexperience was a pain though and after a few moments of awkward strokes I was worse off than before I started. Annoyed at myself for struggling I switched tactics to what I knew would provide at least a little relief.
Grabbing my ancient pillow I shoved it between my legs, balled up and pressed tightly to the small bud I was struggling to figure out. Closing my eyes I’d imagined sitting on his lap, straddling one of his big thighs while his hands cupped my bottom and his voice, deep and husky with want, encouraged me to move.
*”C’mon girl, that’s it. Move for Daddy.”*
It shamed me to think of him that way but I was so lost to the feeling it didn’t stick. Doing as imaginary Josh instructed I ground against the pillow, desperately seeking the short but intense flashes of pleasure it brought. If I did it long and hard enough I’d get a sharp spike that would somewhat ease the tension filling my body. It was nothing like “rolling waves” I read about but it did the trick and wore me out enough to sleep.
The sound of his truck rumbling up pulled me out of my memory and I stood, checking the time. 7:40 A.M., he was early. I needed to get myself under control, this crush was a distraction I didn’t need. What I needed was to get the hell out of this place before things escalated further and finish my degree.
And yeah I wanted kids and a husband and all that lovely stuff but I wasn’t naive enough to believe that Josh was the guy. He smiled at me, opening the passenger door and ushering me in. My heart did a cartwheel in my chest.
He had his choice of anyone. It would never be me and I was alright with that.
It didn’t stop me from wishing it were though.
“My Rori!” Jason’s voice was music to my ears. It was just Josh I’d fallen hard for after all. The toddler waving happily from his car seat in the back lit up my world and motivated me to get out of bed some mornings when I was depressed.
“Hey little man!” I smiled at him before turning to Josh as he pulled out of our driveway. This felt so normal and nice it was almost enough to make me forget where we were driving away from.
“Mornin. How was your night?” I noticed the dark circles under his eyes.
I blushed in spite of myself. “It was good. How about you?”
Josh raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment on the red in my cheeks. “S’fine.”
I mulled over my idea about asking for his help while chattering along with Jason. I’d couched the idea when he was so stern yesterday but he didn’t seem angry any longer and had apologized after all. By the time we pulled into the driveway I’d made up my mind. I spoke before he could open the door.
“Hey, Josh?”
“Hmm?” He tilted his head my way.
“Could-is it okay to ask- because if not I understand-“
“It’s fine just ask your question baby.”
My brain shorted out for a split second. He’s tired, don’t overthink it.
“Can you show me how to like, get stronger? And maybe how to, ya know, throw a punch? For when I go back to campus.” I bit my lip nervously, his expression was so neutral it was impossible to know what he was thinking.
Josh reached over to give my knee a squeeze and my warmth flooded through me. It was so quick I wondered if I’d imagined it but the genuinely warm half smile said otherwise.
“Hell yeah I’ll show you some stuff.”
My heart pounded as I followed the boys inside. I have to get a grip, he’s just being nice. A single quick squeeze doesn’t mean he’s into me.
I noticed the bag of Jason’s things on the couch and my heart dropped. If he was going somewhere else I may not have work for a while.
“Is little man going somewhere?”
“Yeah, my brother’s coming by to get him later, just for the weekend. I’m gonna get some sleep but we can workout some this afternoon, if you’re up for starting now. Just have to work around what’s hurtin.”
My heart soared. “Great, thank you so much.”
——
Jey POV
It was easy to sleep knowing she was safe downstairs with Jason and I made up for what I lost the night before. In my dreams Rori was beneath me, writhing in
pleasure while her fingernails dug into my shoulders and her lips whispered my name over and over like a prayer. Her voice got louder the closer she came to orgasm and I ground into her harder and harder.
“Josh…Josh…Hey Josh?”
Her voice went from thick with pleasure to confusingly loud. Slowly I became aware of someone shaking my shoulder.
“Huh?”
There was a soft giggle from next to me as the bed dipped a little. I realized the object of my dreams was sitting next to me nudging my shoulder. At the same time I realized I had a raging hard on.
“Jon’s here, figured you’d want to say bye to Jason before they took off.”
Shit was it after five already?
I had to get rid of her so I could get this under control. “Yeah. Be right there.”
When I didn’t move immediately she jumped up and ran like she’d been scalded. Maybe she realized she may have crossed a line coming in here, even if it was to get me up for something important.
I couldn’t wait to cross a hell of a lot more lines with her in this room.
But right this minute I needed to get myself presentable, something easy enough to achieve, at least temporarily, with a few deep breaths and splashing some ice cold water on my face.
Loading Jason into the car didn’t take long, he always loved staying with his cousins. Hugging him one last time I stepped back. My brother looked at me from the drivers seat, clearly wanting an explanation. Clapping his shoulder I smiled. “Thanks, got a leak and it’ll just be a lot easier to have guys out to fix it without him under my feet.”
The suspicion in his face melted away and we said our goodbyes. I’d miss Jason but I was excited about “working out” with Aurora, all alone. Not to mention I’d finally have a good chance to question her some. She stood in the kitchen tying up her hair when I walked back in.
“You ready?”
Aurora swallowed but nodded and I noticed her eyes flicker over me. My cock twitched, it was hot thinking she wanted me too. I still needed to clarify whether or not she had a boyfriend and while I couldn’t be certain it was that weird guy at her house who was hurting her I was pretty confident that was the case.
“Good, c’mon.” Leading her into the gym I flicked the lights on.
About 45 minutes later and she flopped on the floor, panting but smiling. Turns out she could throw a decent punch already. Settling behind her on my knees I let my hands fall on her shoulders and waited to see what she would do. Aurora stiffened but didn’t pull away so I slowly began to knead the muscles.
“You did good.” I don’t know if it was my fingers or my words that did it but she moaned softly, her cheeks blushing.
“Thank you.” Her voice was soft and shy.
Continuing up her neck I was gentle as I worked the tension there, surprised at just how tight she was. I decided to get down to what I wanted to know. “Got a boyfriend Rori?”
She blinked her pretty hazel eyes before huffing out a nervous laugh. “A boyfriend? No.”
Relieved, I let that concern go. “Aight. I didn’t think that guy in the porch yesterday was him but ya know, wanted to make sure.” I dug my fingers in a little harder and she drew in a breath with a gasp. My thumbs worked their way down her shoulder blades and her eyes drifted closed. Her muscles quivered under the threadbare tshirt she wore but my eyes were trained on the wet skin of her jaw and neck. I imagined what it would taste like to run my tongue along them in a long stroke.
“Nah, that’s just my mom’s latest boyfriend.”
“Latest?” I didn’t like the sound of that and based on where they lived I doubted these were high quality men drifting in and out of their lives. Already I hated this woman for putting Aurora in danger.
“Yeah, she’s just…I don’t know. She’s got some issues.” Aurora trailed off and I debated how hard to push. This was more than I’d gotten out of her before but I didn’t want her to shut down if I asked the wrong thing. I kept massaging her neck, working my way a little lower to her collar bone and she didn’t resist.
“How’s that feel?”
“Mmm, good.” Just when I thought she was really going to relax into me her phone buzzed. I hated the way she looked panicked when she opened the message. “Oh no, it’s getting really late, I should go.”
Reluctantly I let her stand and got to my feet as well. “C’mon, I’ll take you home.”
Her nerves seemed to get worse and worse during the car ride. Every instinct in me screamed to make her stay, to not drop her off at that trailer. Something bad was going to happen and I knew it.
This time I reached over her to stop her from opening the door with one hand and grabbed her knee with the other. “Aurora look at me.”
She was startled but did as I asked.
“You don’t have to get out of this truck. But if you do, just promise to call me if you’re in trouble.” For a second I thought she was going to stay or maybe burst into tears. Instead she took a deep breath and smiled at me but it didn’t reach her eyes.
“I promise. Again.”
I squeezed her leg one more time before sitting back and letting her go. Something screamed at me to stop her but I didn’t.
I’d regret that sooner than later.
Chapter 5
Aurora POV -
I knew something was up the minute I walked in the front door, a sixth sense of sorts from years of living with a volatile drug addict. My heart skipped a beat when I realized my mother was in the dingy kitchenette stirring away at something on the stove. She never cooked anymore and anything out of the ordinary was cause for concern.
“Oh you’re home, I wondered if we’d see you tonight.”
Stomach twisting I approached her carefully. I’d only responded to her message five times apologizing for being late. “I’m sorry mama, I had to stay late for work.”
“You’re sure it was just for work? I didn’t see a baby in the car today.” Of course she’d been watching from the windows.
“Yes mama, Mr. Fatu offered me rides and I felt rude saying no.” Her face pinched but she recovered into a smile. I could feel the dread building in my lower spine.
“Go sit down honey, dinner is ready and Paul just pulled up with his friend.” Almost anyone else would have written her words off as a normal statement but from her it was a threat, I just didn’t know for what.
“Yes ma’am.”
Paul came clattering in followed closely by another white man who looked meaner and uglier than him. He smiled when he saw me, licking his chapped lips from behind a patchy beard. I shivered in disgust.
“This here is Danny. Aurora, be nice and say hi.” Awkwardly I waved, in fear of what would happen if I didn’t.
He looked at Paul with his beady, murky blue eyes. “She always quiet?”
Paul nodded. “Whaddya think?”
Danny smirked. “How much did you say?”
My heart plummeted to my feet as I stood. “What’s going on?”
All three other people stopped what they were doing. Danny looked amused and Paul looked at my mother expectantly. She came to pat my shoulder with a fake, cold smile.
“Well since you’ve been whoring yourself to your boss we figured you wouldn’t mind if we set you up with some new clients. And this way we make sure we get our cut, fair and square.” Her voice was so calm, mocking me with how caring and sweet she sounded even though her words were poison.
My jaw fell open and my stomach heaved. I couldn’t believe what just was hearing.
“I’m not sleeping with my boss!”
She’d sunk low before but this was completely unreal. I couldn’t believe she would actually agree to pimp me out.
“So, uh, where we gonna do this?” Danny reminded me of his presence.
I wanted to claw the nasty man’s eyes out and run. To where?
*Josh.*
“We’re not! Mom, tell him this is ridiculous, you can’t be serious!”
Pulling out my phone I got off a single message to Josh before Paul was snatching for it.
“SOS” with an alarm emoji.
^^^Trigger warning for attempted SA scene^^^
“Her bedroom is that way.” I’d never hated her so much as I did in that moment when she pointed down the narrow hall.
“No! Mom! Mom!” I shrieked as each man grabbed an arm and begin pulling me.
Danny snarled when I twisted and landed a nasty blow between my shoulders, sending me to the floor. He looked at Paul who gave me another swift kick to the side. “Didn’t tell me you hadn’t broken her in yet.”
“I’ll let you have the next session for free if you wanna help with that.”
With a shrug the other man grabbed my wrist and pulled hard in spite of my struggling. Throwing me onto my rickety twin bed I scrambled, trying to get to a weapon but he was already laying into me with the leather belt he’d pulled from around his waist. My ancient tshirt gave way easily under his hands, giving him direct access to the flesh of my back and shoulders. Blows rained down, burning so fiercely my eyes stung with tears. I curled into the fetal position, covering my head and trying to escape the worst of it.
He stopped hitting me to wrap the leather strap around my wrists and flipped me onto my abused back. Kicking at him didn’t do much even with my healthy ankle. I was tired and sore from the injuries and work out Josh had put me through earlier. My strength to fight was waining fast but I couldn’t just give up. Danny responded to a kick in the shoulder with a powerful punch to the stomach, making me gag and cough.
My jeans didn’t come off as easily as my tshirt but he managed with a few vicious yanks. I didn’t know how to get out of this. Closing my eyes I tried to picture Josh, Jason, my friends, my school, anything to get away from the gut wrenching reality of what was happening. My mother had sold me to this man and his awfully slimy hands were running up my thighs and over my ribs to squeeze my breasts with so much force it tore a lot sob of pain out of my chest.
End of triggering scene
And then, with a yelp of pained surprise, he was gone. For a few seconds all I could hear was the thundering of my pulse but once my body realized he was no longer bearing down on me my senses began to adjust. Shouts and thuds from the living room went on for a few more moments before a particularly nasty sounding crash and then it all went quiet. Unsure of what was going on I remained where I was, shaking and trying to get a grip on my breathing.
Finally I could hear a voice speaking clearly. A voice I knew.
“Don’t move you fuckin cunt.”
Josh appeared in the doorway of my tiny and now destroyed room looking every inch the enraged hero he was. With what strength I had left I launched myself into his arms and he met me halfway, scooping me up and holding me against his chest tightly while I buried my face in his neck.
He pressed his lips to the top of my head and spoke softly. “Do you need anything at all from here?”
I shook my head, unable to form words. With shaking hands he pulled the belt from around my wrists and threw it. Snatching the thin blanket he wrapped it around my shoulders before standing, holding me up bridal style. Wrapping my arms around his shoulders I leaned into him like I never had another.
I’d needed him and there he was.
He’d *saved* me.
The carnage in the living room was testament to his anger. Both men were laid out in the remains of the broken kitchen table, Danny bleeding from a head wound onto the floor. The door had been kicked in and Josh walked through splinters from the flimsy piece of fake wood he’d demolished like he owned the place. My mother sat wordlessly on the couch, her eyes wide in terror as she watched him stalk across the room and out the door.
I wouldn’t remember being bundled or being carried into the house or being carefully dressed in his clothes.
All the rest I would remember from that night came as Josh tucked me into bed next to him, his arms wound tightly around me as he whispered comforting words. Turning slightly I let my heart take the lead for once in my life.
Pressing my lips to his softly as I touched his face I said the only thing I could think of.
“Thank you.”
Reciprocating my kiss gently he held me tighter still. “S’okay now, Daddy’s got you.”
——
Jey POV
My plan may not have been foolproof but it had worked and Rori would never be going back to that awful place. Each time she woke up crying and screaming for me it wrenched my heart and made me murderous at the same. I hoped I’d done permanent damage and seriously considered going back to make sure the job was done.
While I’d let her go I hadn’t gone far, just pulling off the road about a mile away to mull over my options. Banging on the trailer door within minutes after getting her text her mother had creaked it open and tried to tell me to mind my own business and go away.
So I’d done the logical thing and kicked the damn thing as hard as I could, flimsy wood exploding everywhere on impact. Even as angry as I was I wouldn’t hurt a woman but Rori’s sad excuse for a mother didn’t know that. I’d sent her down to the couch with a relatively soft shove, at least compared to what I did to her man, and fear did the rest.
Paul got a firm right to the jaw before a couple swift kicks to the ribs just to show him how it felt. The other male, whose name I didn’t bother to learn, was dealt a couple body blows and some well aimed shots to the face before I threw him head first through their shitty table. The irony of that was the only part of the whole ordeal that made my mouth twitch to remember.
Just because I only pretended to throw hands on television didn’t mean I couldn’t fuck someone up for real if I decided to.
Aurora stirring in my arms got my attention. At first she burrowed deeper into my side, her cheek pressed into my collarbone. Thankfully it seemed like she was just waking up naturally rather than being scared awake by a nightmare. Ten hours punctuated by several rounds of panic wouldn’t be nearly enough to fully recover but maybe I could get her to eat something or shower before sleep claimed her again. Pressing my lips to her forehead I smiled and tried to be reassuring. “Hey sleepy head.”
She jumped so hard it was like I’d electrocuted her and I immediately felt bad for breaking the spell. Tumbling out of the bed Aurora yelped in pain when she hit the dark wood floor. Not what I had been expecting. Kicking the covers off my own legs I knelt down next to her and touched her leg gently. Her hazel eyes were blown wide and she looked a little dazed.
“Hey, hey you with me baby?”
Her throat moved as she swallowed and it looked uncomfortable. “I- Jesus Christ.” Burying her face in her hands she began to sob. Hard, heaving cries from deep in her chest. Pulling her into my lap I let her cling to me and cry it out. I could only imagine how she must feel.
I wasn’t sure how long we sat there with her fist balled into my shirt and her tears soaking it but my left foot had gone completely numb by the time her sobs quieted into hiccups.
“She sold me.” I hated hearing her normally lyrical accent so hoarse and broken. She’d never cry so hard again, I’d make sure of it.
“I know baby girl.” I was very gentle with where I rubbed her arms and sides, minding as best I could all the places she was bruised.
“Why? I was paying her rent, she could have just asked for more money. I could have got another job. I could have worked nights or-or-“
“Aurora.” She paused and I cupped her chin, gently making her look at me. “There was nothing you coulda done. That’s greed baby, greed and addiction.”
Her eyes welled with fresh tears and she sniffed. “She’s gonna be so mad.”
As realization took hold I could see the panic in her swell. “Oh no. Oh no, oh no, I don’t - I haven’t been able to get a room somewhere yet and she’s not gonna let me come back after that. Not unless…” Her voice dropped off and she shuddered.
I waited another beat to make sure she was done talking. “You don’t need to worry.”
She swiped a hand across her eyes. “What do you mean? I’m - this is so inappropriate Mr. Fatu.”
Barking a laugh I pulled her in and dropped another kiss on her forehead before moving to each of her cheeks and then the tip of her nose. “Since when do you call me that? And I mean I’m gonna take care of you from now on but you better start listenin or I’mma spank that fine ass.”
Not the most ‘appropriate’ thing to say but it had the desired effect and she let out a little laugh in spite of her self. Aurora sobered quickly though, worrying her lip and looking up at me through those long lashes. “I didn’t think you saw me that way.”
I shifted, trying to get some feeling back in my foot. “Yeah.” Now it was my turn to feel a little nervous. “Was I wrong thinking you felt that way?”
Maybe I had been wrong taking that little kiss as confirmation.
But I didn’t need to worry. Aurora shook her head emphatically. “No, I do. I have, since like, I started. It’s just that everything over the last few days barely feels real, ya know?”
That made sense. Trauma, especially something so violent and unexpected could shake your mental state up pretty badly. “Makes sense. But hey, I know what I’m feeling right this minute.”
She leaned back to look at me. “Yeah? Gonna share?”
Having finally regained feeling in my foot, I stood up with her in my arms and she reflexively wrapped her arms around my neck. “Hungry. I want breakfast.”
She laughed and hugged me tightly as I carried her to the kitchen.
——
Chapter 6
Aurora POV
Most of the day passed in a blur, I was so tired and slept a lot but Josh had made sure I got what I needed, only leaving my side when I took a shower.
I scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed until my skin was raw, possessed by an urgent need to purge the feeling of Danny’s hands on my body. Closing my eyes I tried to let the water ease the ache I could feel so deep it was like it was in my bones and focus on the positive.
Focus on Josh.
My heart fluttered when I thought about how it felt to be safe in his embrace and the feel of his lips. I was so used to everything being temporary or untrustworthy it was hard not to feel anxiety about it too. Well, more so that he would come to his senses and send me back there. I tightened my arms around myself when it was like my whole body rebelled at the notion.
I’d sleep in a dumpster before I went back there.
That thought sent off a fresh wave of fears and stresses I just couldn’t deal with in the moment. I found myself wanting nothing more than to curl up into Josh’s arms and beg for it all to go away. As if he could read my thoughts a gentle knocking on the door interrupted the free fall into disassociation.
“You okay?” He sounded worried.
I turned off the water, unaware it had progressively gone cold and stepped out, noticing the time on the wall clock. It was eleven, I’d been in here for almost an hour. My whole body warmed at the thought of his concern, mitigating the chill a little bit. I wasn’t used to someone worrying about me.
“Yeah…I just realized I don’t have any clothes though.” I felt young and stupid and vulnerable. Like a child who had forgotten their away bag for a sleepover and was too scared to tell anyone.
“I got you, so long as you don’t mind wearing my stuff again. We can take care o’the rest tomorrow.”
Wrapping myself in a towel I opened the door enough to receive the bundle of clothes he held. A makeshift tank top of his and pair of basketball shorts. It made me smile to myself to think of him chopping up tshirts various ways before his matches. The shorts were a no go, they wouldn’t stay up unless I had something to secure them. I’d have to settle for the shirt and the only ancient pair of panties I had from…that place. Not home. I’d never think of it as home again.
I loved being enveloped by his smell though, just wearing this made me feel safer and more relaxed. Another idea flitted through the back of my mind. One that would surely help me forget Danny and his slimy hands.
Instead of continuing to try and figure out how to get the shorts to stay up, I folded them up. Hesitantly I stepped into the hallway to find him waiting, scrolling on his phone.
His coffee colored eyes swept over me from head to toe and I couldn’t fight the blush I felt blooming. He straightened and I held out the shorts. “I’m sorry, they won’t stay up.”
Josh didn’t speak right away but licked his lips and blinked before looking from my exposed thighs to the floor as he took the garment back and tossed them unceremoniously. When he did talk it was low and soft. “S’okay. You don need to apologize all the time anymore baby.”
My brain was scrambled but hormones were a hell of a thing. I just wanted a little piece of good amid the crazy. Fuck it, what do I have to lose by teasing him a little? “Or what? You gonna spank me for that too?”
His head snapped up with a surprised expression that shifted quickly into a predatory smirk and my breath caught in my throat. When he stepped into my space, crowding me back against the doorframe I wasn’t even aware of the pain from the bruises but focused solely on him instead. Leaning down so our noses touched he never broke eye contact when he answered in a heated whisper.
“Baby girl, Daddy’s gonna spank you for all sorts of things and you gonna beg for more.” Bringing a hand up he cupped my chin and slid a thumb over my bottom lip, dipping into my mouth just a little. “And more. Once you’re feelin better you’ll be screaming for mercy all night, every night.”
I was pretty sure I was going to faint. Fear and need crashed through me together with an overwhelming intensity, the throb between my legs for him roared to life with a vengeance. All I could muster was a whimper and he chuckled softly.
“Gotta be careful what games you play baby, I always win.”
Now that sparked something defiant in me. An aroused defiance, but defiance all the same. I wanted to show him I could play too, this felt good and it worked towards my plan of making me forget all about yesterday.
I pressed my body into his, my nipples becoming hard and sensitive with the friction from pressing into his chest. My arms encircled his neck and his eyes widened in surprise. A hard lump rose against my belly as I tried to get my hips closer to him somehow, seeking relief for my aching pussy. Josh seemed a little uncertain but his arms came around my middle, melding us together nicely.
I didn’t know the right way to ask for what I wanted so I’d just have to go for it. “I want you.”
Simple and to the point.
He groaned, deep in his chest and started peppering kisses down my jaw and neck before retracing the path with a languid stroke of his tongue. My head spun and my hands clutched at his shoulders. I whimpered when his teeth grazed my neck, it felt so good it chased away the doubts and fears, replacing them with blind want and need. In this moment I’d do anything to be closer still.
Josh pressed a knee between my legs, making my head fall back with a gasp. Memories of my fantasy about riding his thigh caused a fresh rush of heat to my core and I ground against him with a helpless abandon. One of his big hands tunneled into my hair and then his lips were crushing mine, tongue thrusting between my teeth to explore and coax my own into action.
The hand not controlling my head began to slide up my thigh, I could feel his strength as he massaged his way up to my hip. Once there, he dug in hard.
Directly into a bruise.
I cried out against his mouth as my body went rigid in an unexpected flash of pain. He let go instantly with a curse but wrapped his arms around me to comfort me. Gritting my teeth against the hurt I pressed my face into his shirt and gave a frustrated whine. I felt him take a deep breath before he spoke.
“I’m sorry baby.”
Wrapping my own arms around him I gave his middle a squeeze, my voice mumbled against his chest. “Not your fault.”
He sighed and pulled back, looking down at me with a soft smile he ran a hand over my hair in a comforting gesture. “Needed to slow down anyway. You ain’t in the right place right now.”
Disappointment and insecurity flared to life within me. “I want to make my own choice.”
“I know baby girl but I don’t want you to hate me tomorrow. *I* don’t want to hate me tomorrow. And I will if I take advantage of you right now.”
Irrational tears burned my nose. Fear and shame made me think he didn’t actually want me and I tried to push away. “I’m sorry.”
“Where you goin?” He didn’t let me go and I fussed against him.
“I don’t know.” I sniffed, feeling confused and ridiculous. Some part of my brain tried to reason with me but the negative parts were louder. “Being close to you like this makes me feel some type of way. Lemme go.”
He laughed, deep a low and sexy and I hated him a little for how I was feeling. “Now hold on. We can still do somethin about that.”
I stopped wiggling and the half hearted pushing, my attention coming back to the warmth I could feel everywhere we touched. Jeez, trauma really does fuck with your ability to regulate.
“What do you mean?”
Stepping back he ran his hand along my arm until our fingers were interlocked and gave me a soft tug. “I just had to get myself together so I don’t cross that big line too early. But I said I’d take care of you and I meant it, now c’mon.”
I’d follow him anywhere right now even if I didn’t have a full picture of what he had in mind. Letting him lead me felt right and my fears he didn’t actually want me were soothed somewhat.
Once in his bedroom he let me go to strip down to his boxers. Shyly I averted my eyes and he snorted. “Better get used to this.”
He pulled me with him as he climbed into the bed, maneuvering until we were facing each other on our knees. “I want you to show me what you like.”
I blinked, suddenly feeling very silly and uncertain. “Uh, what do you mean?”
Josh’s smile was sexy, his beard felt good against my skin as he kissed the corner of my mouth. “Girl, you are somethin else. Show your Daddy how you like to be touched, show him what gets you off.”
Oh I’d understood him the first time but I wasn’t sure how I felt about showing him. “I-uh—I don’t know, it-I feel stupid.”
“There ain’t nothing stupid ‘bouta woman feeling pleasure Rori. Now, show me or there’ll be consequences.”
That bratty desire to be defiant rose in me again, wanted to test him and see what he meant by consequences. Maybe I’d explore that feeling another time, when I wasn’t so nervous. He seemed determined and I was too turned on to argue. At least I’d get a little relief from the ache between my legs. With a defeated sigh I caved. “Okay.”
Josh looked bemused but satisfied he was getting his way. Avoiding eye contact I grabbed a pillow and closed my eyes as I situated it between my knees, trying to find the right spot to put the most pressure. It was never easy and being watched made it so much worse.
“Rori?”
I froze, shame exploding in my gut. “Y-yeah?”
“Have you ever had sex?” His voice was gentle.
I shook my head no. He nodded.
“Been touched by someone else?”
Again I shook my head no and again he nodded.
“Hell have *you* ever touched yourself?”
Biting my lip I shook my head for a third time. “Well, I’ve tried a couple times but I just get frustrated and stop. This makes me -“ I shook my hands nervously, not wanting to say the words -“ya know, makes me feel good. It’s short but it helps.”
Running a hand over his face Josh took a few deep breaths and gripped his growing erection through the plaid fabric he wore. It was hard not to look down but his obvious size made me nervous.
“Whaddya think about when you do it?”
I shifted, seeking some relief. May as well tell him, I was getting frustrated, my nipples tingling and my pussy aching. I was so turned on I was fighting shivers. “Last time I thought about rubbing myself on your thigh instead of the pillow. You held me and helped me move.”
Josh groaned and bit the knuckle on his middle finger before speaking, his voice raw. “You’re makin the whole waiting a couple days part real hard right now baby.”
My own frustration was peaking, he was torturing me and I think he knew it. I sounded petulant but I didn’t care. “You asked!”
Ever so gently he encircled my neck with a hand, exerting a tiny bit of pressure. I felt my bones melt.
“Mind that attitude baby.” He smirked, watching my reaction with the same expression of a cat who’d caught a canary. “I’m decidin how I’m gonna get you off the first time.”
Before I could respond he was moving, shifting so he was situated behind me and slightly to my right, his chest pressed to my back. One of his calloused hands glided up underneath his shirt to cup my breast, rolling the hard pebble there between his thumb and forefinger. He nipped at my neck, alternating his pressure and soothing the spots where he bit me harder with his tongue.
I thought I might cum just from him playing with my breasts, I could feel every roll and pinch in my pussy. “Oh, oh, feels so good!”
I felt him smile against my neck. “Just wait baby, Daddy’s gonna blow your mind.”
Tauntingly the fingers of his other hand ran across the top of my panties, back and forth a few times before finally dipping below the elastic. I bucked against him involuntarily with a gasp when his finger brushed the top of my soaked slit for the first time. “Josh!”
He flat out growled, his fingers becoming more insistent in their exploration, dipping into my wetness. “Jesus fucking Christ, your body’s just beggin to be fucked huh baby? You want Daddy to fuck you?”
If it weren’t mad with need I’d have been ashamed of the noise I made, somewhere between a keen and a wail. When his fingers started circling my swollen clit, swiping over the sensitive bud with just the right amount of pressure I thought I was going to break apart. “Yes! Yes Daddy please!”
Letting go of my breast he used that hand to guide one of mine into his boxers to circle around his cock. I moaned, even if I couldn’t see him just feeling the thick, veiny staff in my hand was enthralling and so, so hot. Guiding my hand with his own he began making long strokes as he slid his other middle finger inside me. My walls clamped down around the digit, it was slightly uncomfortable but the added sensation of the heel of his hand pressed into my clit over road it with pleasure.
Pressing his lips to my ear he smirked even as he began to pant, his own pleasure building. “Ride my hand baby, ride it til you cum for me.”
It didn’t take a genius to know what he meant by “ride”. Doing what I would have if it were just the pillow I rolled my hips and lights exploded behind my eyes. “Oh my god!”
My whole body shuddered and I felt my control slip away, completely lost to the insane pleasure grinding into his hand brought me. I’d never managed a fraction of how good this felt on my own. Waves began to build within me and suddenly all those romance novels made sense.
“That’s it baby, give it all to me.” His hand sped up and so did I, feeling an explosion building within me.
“I-Josh, oh-I think I’m gonna cum!”
“Hmm, go for it baby girl, lemme see your face while you cum for me.”
I let my head drop back against his shoulder and opened my eyes to watch his face. The pressure in me erupted, sending shock after shock of intense pleasure through me. It felt like my whole body from head to toe was racked with the overwhelming sensation of my orgasm as my walls clamped around his finger over and over again. Relaxation like I’d never felt before washed through me amid the aftershocks and I slumped against him.
Wetness coated my fingers now as he continued to use my hand to jack off. Josh’s own noises were becoming more erratic as his release drew near. I leaned up to kiss him, deciding I’d try talking to him like he did me.
“Cum for me Daddy, I wanna make you feel good too.”
Removing his finger from me he brought it to his mouth and sucked my essence off, his eyes drifting closed as he moaned low and deep and long. After another few strokes his whole body stiffened, his dick pulsing in my hand with his release. I loved the look on his face as he orgasmed, it was so hot I felt a fresh spark of want.
“Shit baby, that was good.” Slowly, reluctantly he got up and padded over to the bathroom. He was completely naked when he came back with a hand towel. “Here sexy, clean up and I’m gonna get some clean boxers.”
Removing my underwear I did as he said, tossing the soaked garment and towel into the hamper as he crawled back into bed with me. Settling into his arms, my ear pressed to his heartbeat, I sighed contentedly, sleep already blurring my vision. “Thank you, this still hardly feels real.”
“You ain’t never gonna have to worry again baby. Now get some sleep.”
The last thing I remembered was him pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
—-
Jey POV
The first thing I became aware of the next morning were the long strands of sweet smelling auburn hair tickling my nose. The second thing I became aware of was her naked bottom pressed firmly against my morning wood, making me grateful I wore boxers to sleep. In a few weeks I’d be able to just roll her over on my stomach and slide into her soft heat, waking her up by fucking her.
Carefully so as not to wake her I shifted out of bed. She gave a slight whimper before burying her face in my pillow and settling back into sleep. Good. She needed it.
I played last night back over in my head as I filled a bottle of water, wrote a quick note that said “gym or kitchen” to leave on the bedside table to she wouldn’t panic about waking up alone and moved on into my morning workout. It felt good to move the weights around and lose myself to the focus it brought. A lot had changed in a short amount of time and it felt good to do something normal and consistent.
It had taken every shred of control I had not to push all the way and just take what I wanted. I’d been lost for a minute when she’d pressed that sweet, curvy little body against me, the want clouding her hazel eyes and her hips grinding deliciously against my leg. I don’t think I would have held back if she hadn’t cried out in pain and she deserved better for her first time than being rutted into against a doorframe. Not to mention I wanted her healthy and clear headed, not bruised and freshly traumatized.
Remembering the way her body had clutched my finger like a fucking fist caused a rush of blood to my cock. It turned a dark part of me on to know I would be the only man to ever have her. Normally I didn’t mess with younger women or virgins, I could be a hothead and made some stupid choices here and there but I really wasn’t interested in breaking some innocent girls heart. Sex was great, tears not so much.
A ding from my phone brought me back to the present and I dropped down from the pull up handles. A message from Jonathan along several others from Sami and Joe and Phil. Only one of them had my son and I didn’t have the wherewithal to chat about much else right now. At least not without spilling the whole ordeal.
“**when’s good? we can bring dinner w/ little man**
I wondered if he’d drop off food and Jason on the porch and drive away. I doubted it but I also felt a twinge of anxiety at the thought of explaining the situation to anyone, let alone my twin. And Trinity.
The longer I waited the worse it would be though.
Taking a deep breath I responded.
**yeah thanks. 7?**
While I waited for him to respond I hopped on the delivery app and ordered a few pairs of underwear and simple blue tank top dress in Medium. I wasn’t an expert on women’s sizes but I figured that was safe. I’d let Rori go shopping for herself when she felt up for it. The thought of spoiling her, of dressing her in nice clothes and other nice things made me grin. I’d never mentioned it but I’d noticed she wore the same few ancient articles all the time.
**bet, c u later**
Wrapping up my workout I moved to the kitchen to make breakfast and debated waking her up. I didn’t have to wonder what to do long when she appeared in the room, making me jump and swear which was followed by her giggling.
“Gonna get you a damn bell.” I went to her and pulled her close as a blush stole across her cheeks. “How’d you sleep baby?”
“Not bad. Was pretty tired after last night.” Her fingers were drawing shapes on my chest, causing a tingling feeling to spread into my lower body.
I laughed and stroked her hair. “Did you like that?”
Aurora nodded shyly and ducked her head to avoid eye contact.
Dropping my head to kiss the shell of her ear I smiled when I felt her shiver. “You want Daddy to touch you some more baby?”
Embarrassed she pressed her face into my chest and nodded again.
“Nah girl, you gotta look at me when you ask me to make you cum.”
Biting her lip she looked up at me through those lashes, the same look that had me thinking about her on her knees, and whispered.
“Please?”
Hauling her over my shoulder made her shriek but the laughter it dissolved into told me she wasn’t upset. Breakfast forgotten I headed for the bathroom, an entirely different meal now on my mind. Swatting her ass lightly made her squirm and whimper deliciously. I couldn’t wait to hear the noises she’d make with my tongue buried in her while orgasm after orgasm tore through her.
“What’re you doing?”
“You’ll see baby.” I liked the sound of her laugh so I tickled her bare thighs making her wiggle even more. She gasped then froze when we got to the master bath and I sat her on the cool marble counter.
“Uh, Josh?” Aurora sounded uncertain.
“Hmm? You gonna get nervous now?” I cranked in the water and turned to her.
She crossed her arms over her chest defensively. “No…”
I smiled and held the sides of her face, guiding her in for a deep kiss. Coaxing her with my tongue I felt her relax and return the kiss, gently pressing back against my invasion as she slid her hands up my chest to my shoulders. Waiting was going to be so hard. Breaking away I grinned down at her.
“We don have to do anythin you ain’t ready for. All you ever gotta do is say ‘stop it’ and I promise I will.”
Aurora sighed and I could feel the relief roll over her shoulders. “Thank you. I want you so much I can’t think one minute and then the next I’m really nervous and then I’m sad.”
It made sense, she had been through so much. “Well where you at right now?”
Glancing at the shower before looking back at me she answered in a shy whisper. “Can’t think.”
I ran my hands up her thighs until my thumbs rested against her lips there, hovering just outside her slit. She trembled and whined. “You wet for me?”
She nodded and I took my hands away to pull the shirt off, leaving her completely exposed before stripping down myself. I liked the little gasp she gave before averting her eyes again. Mindful of our states I wrapped her legs around my waist and carried her to the shower. The hot water was incredible but didn’t come close to the feeling of her nakedness pressed against me. All I would have to do is pin her to the wall and thrust.
I set her down under the spray but pressed her to the cold wall with a kiss, trailing down her neck to her shoulder. Her hands slid up and down my wet biceps, squeezing and clawing. Closing my mouth around one of her brown nipples she cried out when I sucked, rolling my tongue over the sensitive bud.
“Josh! Oh!” Girl had some sensitive nipples. Good, I couldn’t wait to torture them and try to make her cum that way. But another time, right now I had something else planned.
Careful to as not to slip on the slick floor I got to my knees in front of her while kissing my way down her belly. I loved the way her whole body twitched when I gently bit her inner thighs.
“Put your legs on my shoulders baby.” I kissed her lower belly one more time before lifting her bottom. She did as instructed but she looked off balance as her hands fought for purchase on the stone wall. “And your hands in my hair.”
“What’re you gonna-oh god!” Aurora’s hands tunneled into my hair as I slid my tongue along her wet seam. She tasted so good it made me moan and I continued lapping at her.
Nails dug into my scalp as I picked up the pace, alternating between circling her clit and plunging deep into her pussy, thighs quivered and tightened around my ears and her heels dug into my back. She moaned and cried out, my name tumbling off her lips over and over again. But I wanted something else.
Carefully I shifted most of her weight to my shoulders in order to free up a hand. She whined when I pulled back a bit but kept teasing her opening with a finger. “Wanna hear you call me Daddy baby girl. I want you to beg Daddy to let you cum.”
When our eyes met I was rewarded with a gorgeous sight, her lips parted ever so slightly as she breathed, eyes half lidded and cheeks bright. She was completely mine to do with whatever I wanted in that moment and the power of her trust was better than any drink.
“P-please Daddy, please let me cum for you.” Her lack of control was evident in the tremble of her voice. I wouldn’t make her suffer too long. We could play those games another time.
Pressing my face back to her pussy I slid my middle finger into her slowly while sucking on that delicate bundle of nerves. Her head fell back and she arched into me with a wail as her walls spasmed around my finger. I kept going, kept feasting at her through the waves of her first orgasm and into the next as she began to twist and buck, now crying out for mercy.
“Too much! Too much! JOSH!” As her second release peaked her voice cracked with a scream I’d never forget. I slowed down but kept licking until she began tapping out on my arm and pleading with me to stop.
As promised I let her go and she melted into my arms, we sat that way for a few moments while she caught her breath. After a few minutes I nudged her chin so she’d look up at me. “You good?”
“I didn’t know my body could do that twice in a row.” The shock in her voice was a nice stroke to my ego. I prided myself on being a giving partner, I loved a woman’s face lost in pleasure.
“That’s just a taste too baby girl. I bet we can get more than that outta ya.”
Her grin took on a mischievous quirk. “What about you? Can I do that?” Inquisitive fingers encircled my cock and I grunted. Righting myself I put a hand on her shoulder indicating she stay down on her knees.
And there it was, that look where she bit her lip and looked up at me, only this time droplets of water caught in her long lashes giving her an unearthly beauty. Copying my earlier motions she ran her hands up my thighs before finally touching me again, carefully stroking my length. Gently grabbing a fistful of her hair I guided her until the tip was pressed to her lips.
“Breathe through your nose and take your time. So long as you don’t bite me I’ll prolly like whatever you do.”
I knew exactly what I liked in a blow job but this wasn’t the time for that kind of roughness. Instead I wanted to let her explore and take it at her own pace for now, until she was more comfortable. Then I’d worry about getting all the way down her throat.
It was impossible to contain my hiss when her tongue flicked out over the tip, she gave a few more licks before taking the tip fully into her mouth for few sucks. The sight of her like this was so hot, I never wanted to forget. Carefully, she inched a little farther, taking an another inch or so. She still had a long way to go and it was hard fighting the urge to thrust forward.
“Gimme your hand baby.”
She did as instructed without stopping the back and forth motion she’d started on those first few inches. Taking her fist I wrapped it around the base and showed her how to move her hand in time with her mouth. Wet and sloppy with her saliva her hand glided up and down smoothly, pretty soon I was the one twitching with my head thrown back.
Taking a little more Aurora moaned around me before taking so much she finally gagged. Knowing it was getting her turned on too and that she wanted more was just about enough to send me over. I stopped her by pulling her head back. “Lemme cum on that pretty face baby.”
She nodded and using her hand it only took a few more seconds of stroking before I painted her face and hair and chest with a deeply satisfied groan. Watching her pink tongue swipe my essence off her lips was almost enough to get me hard again even so soon.
“Did I do okay?” I loved the shy but hopeful expression as I pulled her to her feet to rinse us both off.
“Nah baby, you did great.” I kissed the top of her head, turning off the water and stepping out, pulling her along.
My phone buzzed letting me know her clothes were here. Good, I needed to tell her about Jon and Trinity coming for dinner anyway.
Aurora smiled at me and went about drying off, sneaking looks over as we exited the room.
“I ordered you some clothes and they’re here, I’mma get dressed and go grab em. Need to talk over some food so meet me in the kitchen?”
With a nod she danced off to the kitchen in her towel and I smiled after her. Now I just had to get over the hurdle of explaining this to my brother and his wife without sounding like a total head case.
Chapter 7
Aurora POV
“Josh…”
“We don *have* to say anything specific. These things, it’s just gonna be hard to keep it from Jon anyway. Can’t ever hide shit from each other.”
I nodded but it didn’t make me feel any better. It was easy to accept that he had strong bonds to his family, I just didn’t know how that felt. Everything still felt new and raw, I wasn’t even a whole 72 hours into this relationship before he’s talking about letting people know. It felt rushed and I couldn’t tell if I would feel that way normally or just because of the situation.
“Okay.” His eyes narrowed, my tone must not have been very convincing.
“Bullshit. You better learn t’speak up for yourself ‘round here.”
Crossing my arms I tried to force the words out of my throat. It wasn’t easy, I’d never been asked directly how I felt about things. Not unless I was going to be punished for those feelings.
“Promise you won’t be angry?”
Understanding dawned in his eyes and his whole face softened. Gently he tucked a loose strand of my crazy hair behind an ear. “Promise.”
“It feels rushed. This-us-I don’t even know what we are. I don’t know what’s safe to assume or not. I’m nervous. What if they don’t like me? Or thin-mmph!”
Josh cut me off by pressing his lips to mine with a grin. His hands ran gently over my arms and back up to stop at my shoulders with a comforting pressure. “Relax baby girl. You and Trinity are gonna make a great team and Jon’s gon love you just because. It’s me they’re gonna be mad at.”
That didn’t make sense. Why would they be mad at him when he’d saved me? “Why?”
With a groan he swiped a hand over his face. “Cuz anyone with sense would assume I’m completely takin advantage of you. Hell I am. Never shoulda touched you.”
Tears built in my eyes as fear rippled through me again when his face became clouded with guilt. What if he decided he didn’t really want me or this was all too wrong? I didn’t want that. My heart hurt at the thought of not feeling him close anymore.
“But-but-“
“Shhh, baby.” His calloused hands cupped my face and his thumbs ran along my jaw. “Doesn’t mean I plan t’stop.”
My emotions were a roller coaster and I really didn’t appreciate him sending me for another loop. I reared back and punched him in the shoulder, not hard enough apparently, but he was right again about winning games. He acted as if I’d dislocated it, making a dramatic noise and falling to his knees in front of me, effective in making me laugh as he’d planned.
When he started running his hands up and down my thighs while kissing my stomach through the soft cotton dress he’d presented me earlier my laughter dissolved into soft sighs. I gripped the counter and tried to grit my teeth in an effort to hold onto my frustration.
“Not fair.”
He was pushing the knee length hem up past my waist with one hand while the other ran two fingers over my clothed slit. Even through the underwear the sensation made me twitch, my hips seeking more. As much as my body wanted it I needed to think, to get ready. I pushed him away
“Stop it.”
The twist of his lips was contrite but he stood and guided me to the table. “Here, sit and I’ll make us somethin to eat.”
“What do we tell them?” Fidgeting I realized for the first time since texting Josh I didn’t have my phone. “Dammit.”
“Hmm?” He raised an eyebrow at me.
“My phone. Oh man, my laptop. How am I gonna get schoolwork done?” All the overwhelming feelings that felt like they were hovering just behind a dam threatened to spill over. Panic tightened my chest and made my head swim, I dropped it into my hands, grinding the heels of my palms into my eyes. Josh was by my side right away, murmuring soft, comforting words in my ear while he petted my hair.
“Hey, hey, you gotta breathe Aurora. We’re gonna take care of all that, I was just waiting for you to feel better before I brought it up. Get you a new phone, new computer, new clothes, all of it, whatever you need.”
Instead of stopping my tears his words broke the dam and I started crying again, this time in a weird mix of sadness, stress, gratitude and love. It was hard to believe he cared so much but I had no choice but to trust him. Not something I was inherently unhappy about but also not something I was used to. Everyone in my life had let me down so far. Would Josh really be different?
“Let it out baby.” He cradled me against his shoulder and let me sob. Faster than before I felt the immense waves of emotions subsiding and my cries faded only for my stomach to growl loudly.
Josh laughed, rubbing my neck and kissing my forehead as he stood and went about fixing sandwiches.
“Thanks.”
“You don’t have to thank me but you’re welcome. As for your first question, we’re gonna tell ‘em the truth. I don’t like lying to Jon an there’s no point. Now, what we tell everyone else may be different. But don’t worry bout that tonight.”
I was struggling with the thought of talking to his closest relative, I couldn’t conceive the thought of more people right now. Taking a bite of my meal I nodded, using the time I needed to chew to think over what I wanted to say.
“I don’t really understand your need to tell him but I can be okay with it. But can we keep it at them for now please?”
“Course baby.”
“I really miss Jason, can’t wait to hug him.” The little boys love would be a much needed balm right now.
“Me too.”
It felt good to be listened to even if I didn’t understand how I was feeling. I just have zoned out because Josh laid a hand over one of my and called my name quietly.
“You with me Rori?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you really wanna be together? We don’t-“ he paused and worked his jaw for a second “-don’t have to be together ya know. I’ll make sure you’re okay and I’m gonna keep paying you for taking care of Jason. If you know, you wanna leave at some point.” He was squeezing my hand now, almost to the point of pain.
I loved his touch. Raising my gaze from where our hands rested on the table to his dark eyes I swallowed and tried to make sure whatever I said next captured what I wanted to say. ‘Yeah, duh’ didn’t seem right.
“You asked me earlier and my answer is the same. No body else I’ve met has made me feel like this.” I paused and tilted my head in thought. “I like our lives together so far. I don’t wanna go anywhere. Just scared. Like it’s too good to be true.”
He nodded. “You been through a lot, hell I don’t hardly know what all, but we can make something outta this, something real good. Just gotta do the work.”
“No you sound like the school counselor.” I felt my lips quirk into a grin when he made a face.
“Ugh don’t remind me how young you are. And I sound like that cuz I went to therapy. You’re gonna go too.” Now that surprised me.
“You go to therapy?”
“Yeah. Ever since little man was born. Can’t be mad all the time with a kid around, ya know?” He tilted his head and smiled with a shrug.
“Yeah. I don’t even know my dad’s name.” I laughed when he winced. “It’s okay. I’ve have a long time to make peace with it.”
“Still. I know it’ll take some time but I want you to trust I’m not gonna go anywhere or hurt you or throw you out.” I don’t know how he read my mind so well but I appreciated hearing it all.
“Now c’mere.” Pulling me into his lap Josh buried his face in my neck, nipping and kissing and licking softly while he massaged my thigh. Smacking his shoulder I shrieked a laugh.
“You’re the worst!”
“Oh you have no idea.” And with that he slid a hand up my dress again, pressing that most sensitive spot while his lips worked their way to my ear. “Don’t want you thinkin of sad stuff. Want you all hot and bothered and moaning.”
He got his wish as he worked me with his hand until I was clutching his shoulders and making a mess in his lap. Laying against his chest as the aftershocks receded I closed my eyes and let the remaining exhaustion steal me under again. My last coherent thoughts were on his voice murming to me softly.
“I got you baby, Daddy’s gonna keep you safe, I promise. You’re home with me now.” I thought I dreamed the last part but I would have sworn he said, “I love you.”
—-
Jey POV
Carrying the small woman in my arms was becoming a habit I didn’t want to get rid of. I loved how she melded into me as if she was fucking custom fitted. Loved how easily she let me maneuver her and the warmth of her curves. Loved her laugh and her accent and the way she moved.
I loved Aurora Begay.
Goddamit.
It wasn’t easy to come to terms with the fact that I was, indeed, taking advantage of her situation. It was impossible not to be touching her all the time, like I needed to make sure she was really here, really okay and really wanted me back. I wanted her to forget the bad she’d been through but was also painfully aware that isn’t how it works.
Settling her sleeping form on the sofa I went to work on the house. There wasn’t much to do without little man leaving a trail of crumbs and toys behind him. Something a dog would be good for helping clean up. An idea occurred to me. Maybe Aurora would like a companion? Jason would lose it for a dog.
I decided we were going to the local shelter if that’s what Rori ended up wanting. Running the easy mop over the floor I looked over at her on the couch. I’d do just about whatever she wanted to make her happy, something I had a feeling fancy things wouldn’t accomplish but another being to love and be loved by would.
Jason. I was thankful they already got on so well and that he was so young. At three there wouldn’t be much of a difference in his perception of the situation. If anything, having ‘his Rori’ around more often and closer would be a good thing in his mind. Once I was satisfied with the state of the downstairs I settled in next to her and checked the time. Almost 7, my brother would be rolling up any minute.
Reaching over I nudged her shoulder. “Hey baby, wake up.”
“Hmm?” She stretched and looked disoriented upon opening her eyes at first but smiled when they landed on me. Again I tugged her close to me, enjoying the smell of her hair and the way she giggled when my beard tickled her neck.
“They gon be here soon. You feel ready? Need to do anything?”
No sooner than she shook her heard no the doorbell rang. I could see the anxiety flicker in the way her brows drew together and her lips tightened. Kissing her forehead I went to let them in.
“It’ll be okay, I promise.”
My brother and his family tumbled in like usual, talking and laughing about something or other while handing a waving Jason over to me for a hug. Trinity noticed Aurora standing in the living room first and turned to me with a confused expression. She nudged Jonathan and he did the same, before Jason finally noticed her from my arms. His scream of joy was piercing.
“MY RORI HERE!”
Rushing to him with a huge smile I was happy to see she wasn’t shy about showing her love for him. Her whole face was heart stopping as she swept him away from me and his chubby arms locked her neck in a vice.
“Sure am little dude!”
“Let’s move this to the dining room.” Neither Jon nor Trinity were satisfied but did what I asked. “Aurora? Can you start setting up while I get drinks baby?”
I made sure to add that to the end and avoided meeting their gazes. They’d have it explained soon enough.
Of course my twin followed me through the swinging door into the kitchen, putting a hand against the refrigerator door so I couldn’t open it before he finally spoke. “Excuse me.”
I sighed. “Yeah?”
“The fuck you calling Jason’s nanny “baby” for? Why is she here Joshua?”
I knew he’d be mad but using my whole first name let me know we were starting off at a solid 7.5 on the Richter scale.
“I’ll explain everything after dinner and the kids are occupied k?”
He pushed away with a huff, his anger palpable but helped me gather beers and cups of water. When we got back to the dining room Aurora and Trinity had all three kids settled in their seats as they portioned out food, making small talk about the kids. I was relieved they seemed to have slipped into conversation on their own. Dinner was nice but quick as they caught Aurora and I up in what everyone had done that weekend. It was obvious they were rushing and I couldn’t blame them, I may or may not have dropped the “baby” just to aggravate the situation but also to give them a heads up in a weird way.
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