#also hannibal is such a little shit oh my god

[deansleftasscheek]

Hey! So these two frames being back to back is actually fucking wild! ❤️

[ghoastixx]

Horror characters w/ a child in the school musical

Notes: In honor of my school's drama club being shut down and me having to go to my neighboring school. (You can tell I have favorites ;))

Includes: Otis Driftwood, Baby Firefly, Mama Firefly, Choptop Sawyer, Billy and Stu, Carrie White, Hannibal Lecter (and Will Graham), Beetlejuice, Micheal Myers (A bit RZ), The Lost Boys,

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Otis Driftwood

The fact that you even have to go to school is a problem to him. With his whole "I hate rules" get up, did you really think he'd want you going to some crummy government public school? He literally hates everything about it..

But... it would be suspicious if you didn't go to school, considering some people in the neighboring town knew there was a kid in the house..

When you bring up wanting to be in your school's musical?

He's all for it, wether you're a little kid or a teenager, surprisingly.

I think he'd be into the idea since he himself is very artsy, he sees it as his kiddo trying to express themselves, and he's all for it.

Especially if you are also in charge of the set (My school's was five people so I always did set), he's so excited to see what you come up with, even if it boringly lacks and pain and suffering.

He won't clean up to come watch it, he will genuinely show up with his matty white hair under his oddly stained cowboy hat, his 'burn this flag' tank top, dirty boots.. he gets odd looks, no one sits next to him or the family, murmuring that they stink.

he's so proud.

"______, do you know who that guy in the front row who keeps grimacing is in the cowboy hat? He's scaring off our audience,"

"That's my dad :)"

Baby Firefly

Oh, she is EXCITED

As a performer herself, coughcoughthefloorshowcoughcough,

If this is a highschool show, she gets into alllll the drama. All the petty fights, tantrums, affairs going on, all the juicy shit that happens during musical season. Perfect person to bitch with about it.

She will come to every single one of the shows, she tells people to come constantly.

She'd have you practice in front of victims as an "audience,"

She is so thrilled, this is the funnest thing ever to her.

Gushes over the costumes

If you don't get a lead you really wanted, she is just as petty as you are about it.

Opening night, she'll give you a boquet of flowers she totally didn't steal before hand.

The best drama mama!

"She's such a bitch, who's she think she is, huh? You deserved that role much more than them, god what a whore."

"Tell me about it,"

Mama Firefly

Aw, she thinks its so dear.

It's been a long time since she had a little one in the home, she's excited to do things that actually make her feel like a mom again.

Supports you in any way you need, practice running late? She's packed you a sandwich and an extra water. Need help going over a scene? Well, she'll try her damn best!

I feel she'd be the type of mom to help make her kids costume if it fell on the kids shoulder

She is so excited to see it when it comes time, she drags R.J, Otis, and Baby (sorry Tiny) out of the home to go see it

She dresses up all nice and fights her way to the front row

She cheers loudly for you.

"Do we have to be here?" Otis grumbled, "Yes, this is your little sibling, now hush it's startin'"

Chop-Top Sawyer

Oh god it's a mess,

it's not that he's not excited, he's very excited his spitfire is into music just like him

but that's the problem, he's too excited.

It's not like he can just... come and watch-

He's not exactly normal, y'know.

Now this could go two different ways,

1. He doesn't go watch, but makes Drayton go and record it so he can watch it himself (if he cares enough by then)

2. He goes and causes a scene and you both just blame it on his Vietnam PTSD which gets you both a lot of sympathy points.

If he does get to go, he freaks a lot of people out. He wears his wig, assuming they replaced his Sonny Bono wig, but is constantly digging at his plate with his tongue just..sticking out. Plus he talks funny and stinks and- god people are trying to figure out who this loud creeper is and why he's here..

Then they see him at the end of the show...standing with you. Gossip spreads quickly..

Some who refuse to believe it, mistake Drayton as your father at the end of the show.

"Hello, I'm assuming your ______'s father? I wanted to tell you just how talented-" "Oh! Hey Mister Johnson, I see you've met my uncle Drayton," "Uncle?" "Yeah, this is my dad," "Oh...Uhm..." "Hi *heavy breathing*" "Forgive him, he's still adjusting from 'Nam."

Billy and Stu

They are both so incredibly normal about your interests

So I'm like conflicted cause one part of me wants to believe that they don't really care all that much but the other part of me that recognizes them as huge nerds is wielding a sword.

Shut up, Stu had a musical phase in middle school, FIGHT ME.

Stu is definitely more excited than Billy is

and it's not that Billy's not excited, Stu just shows it more than Billy.

100% flexible with your schedule, they take turns dropping you off and picking you up if you can't drive.

Stu uses it as an excuse to get out of stuff.

"Sorry, can't, gotta take chick-pea to practice tonight, yeah sooo sorry."

Billy is the type to get volunteered by you if big pieces of the set need done and no one else will do it.

He'll grumble, but it will be done.

Stu donates a lot of money towards the program, half in attempts to get the director to favorite you and give you parts you want.

Stu and Billy come to every show, all of them, without fail.

This is important to you, and you're important to them, so this is important to them.

Stu is so hype on opening night, giving you a pep-talk all day before you go to get ready.

They are so proud of you when the show is over, and will both help you out of that after show slumps.

"C'mon baby, what was the name of the lead your the understudy for?" "Kelly?" "No, Chick-pea, the name of the actor..." "Guys- no."

Carrie White

stop she's so proud of you,

even if you don't end up with a big part, she's so proud that you have the confidence to do something she would have never dared to of done when she was young.

She might even be involved? I could see her making costumes- I mean, she made her prom dress and that shit was stunning.

I think she'd be more partial to you doing activities such as music or band or some form of art over sports.

The arts are just a lot less dangerous than sports, she just wants you to be safe. But she also wants you to be happy.

She will come to every single show,

She'd be the mom to help you go over lines if you needed to as well, or offer to try and help practice a dance you needed to learn.

She definitely cries watching you up on stage,

will get you the prettiest flowers and tell all your co-stars that they did such a good job.

"Mama, can you help me with this scene? I just need you to read for Yente," "Of course honey, where do you want me to start?:)"

Hannibal Lecter and Will Graham,

First off, you go to a private school. No kin of Lecter's is going to be caught dead in a public school.

He is rather thrilled when you mention performing for the school, he does love the arts after all.

Whatever you want and or need, singing lessons, dancing lessons, acting classes, whatever you want.

He will dress up for the occasion, he brings Will as well who is way under dressed, but it's always nice to see him.

I don't think Hannibal would come to every show, sometimes his appointments run late, he has a lot to do, but he will come if you have a parents night and he will come see the opening show.

If anything, Will might try and make all of them if you two are close, he knows what it's like not to have a parent show up to something so important.

Hannibal would make food for a cast party if you had one after.

No there are no people in it.

Hannibal has DVD's of all of the shows you have ever done and whips them out ALL THE TIME... The first time Will even heard of you-

"Hannibal, what are all these DVD's? Why are they labeled '_____'?" "Hm? Oh. _______ is my child, those are their performance videos." "you have a kid-" "They do musical theater, sit down, we shall watch the films." "you have...a kid-"

Beetlejuice

He's actually so upset that he can't come watch your show physically.

It's okay- there's a recorded version for him. He'll feel less bad.

He LOVES performing so this is actually perfect, but of course it is! You're his little ghoul.

He actually already knows the whole show so he is very good at helping you practice.

"Aw- toots- you're almost as good as me. Almost."

Micheal Myers (Slight RZ)

Like most things, he's indifferent.

Good luck getting him to come see even one of your shows.

He shows interest in your little hobby when you talk about it, sit next to him and talk about the show as he makes his masks. He listens.

Now.. If he does come see a show? He will only see one, most likely the last one as they are less packed (less likely anyone will recognize him,)

He'll wear a medical mask, his hair mostly covering the rest of his face, he sits in the very back.

He's slightly warmed at just how much the act meant to you.

Your director will approach you after seeing you hug the very tall man with the long hair and covered face, as he just pat you haphazardly on the head before leaving.

"______, someone you know?" "uh huh, that's my dad." "Your dad.. huh.. he seems very quiet." "Yeah, he don't say very much. I didn't think he was gonna come." "Well, I'm glad he did." "yeah, me too."

The Lost Boys

obviously, if you're going to school, you're a human still.

The only way they could come see your show would be if it was late in the evening, and they would probably show up late.

They're very happy for you and want to support you! It's just difficult with them being vampires.

Paul and Marko definitely get a kick out of acting out scenes from your script with you.

Dwayne is interested in the storyline, he also enjoys watching you act. You're in your element, it's like you're a different person.

David, on the other hand, is just amused that you're into all this stuff. It's not that he thinks its dumb or anything, he thinks you do a great job, it's just not really his scene, y'know.

But, you're their baby bat, they'd literally do anything for you, so as you're up on stage during the third song and see a blur of leather jackets and mullets sitting in the back, you can't help but smile.

"God- why are the guys from the board walk here." "They're my family :)" 'HUH-"

[gauloiseblue]

Man I love other authors getting curious and immediately almost immediately recoiling. How was Haunting Adeline pookie honestly. Rant to me.

How can I rant to you when you're anonymous bestie 😭😭

So I just watched the review of the book and holy shit????? Is that supposed to be a porn for women???? Because????? That's like???? A literal porn for men????? Huh??????

Girl, I grew up with Agatha Christie's books and oh my god. Nothing ever came close to her dark romance, like, have you even read five little pigs?? Peril at end house??? The hollow?? Sleeping murder??? Death on the nile???? But somehow, that author dares call her stories a dark romance????

I feel like dark romance is way better outside its genre, like thriller or horror, or even drama. And IF they still wanna write a dark romance, why not make it deep like IWTV or Hannibal?? Or maybe the devotion of suspect X??? Where's the guilt?? Where's the inhuman obsession??

But ngl, my biggest pet peeve with those stories are like, the characters are so shallow. The men only want pussy, and the women are somehow so naive, she can't possibly survive in this era 😭 also, what's up with the violence that smells suspiciously misogynistic??? AND I CAN'T EVEN WHEN THE MAN HELD A ROSE BETWEEN HIS TEETH WHILE KILLING A DUDE. LIKE???? 😭😭😭😭😭😭 That's what you called charming??????? Huh????????

Yeah, I'm retreating back to my shell. Goodbye world.

[dollmonger]

Gentlemen and ladies, bald headed babies and fillies and gentle colts .. I PRESENT YOU, MY BRIEF INTRODUCTION... 8^)

🦷ུ⃨ ✞︎ GREETINGS INTERBUTTS BEINGS.. I AM RANDAL. No age defined, I lay withering on my deathbed, decaying relentlessly. My presence infiltrates every crevice and crack of your consciousness, a squirming, insidious entity. . ROTFEST EXTRAVAGANZA.🦷

My teacups are caked in mud and blood. ⚰️ JUST KILLED MY PHARMACIST FOR MY PILLS～～Have a problem boblem with me? Knit yourself socks buddy pal...la la laalaa..★

Liked you....since 1980.

CARRD RETROSPRING BEARBLOG STRAWPAGE TWITTER SPOTIFY I piss like a bitch BLEEDS. Butter, flour, and a WHOLE LOT of MURDER. Ask me what the 90s was really like!

. +* ( ´-ω･)▄︻┻┳══━一ﾊﾞｷｭｰﾝ☆

(( THIS IS A NO FRENEMIES ZONE. FUCK OFF ABHORRENT CREATURES, BEGONE, OR FACE MY WRATH. I CAN ONLY HOPE THAT YOUR EXISTENCE IS AS UNBEARABLE TO YOU AS IT IS TO ME. GET OUT OF MY SIGHT THIS INSTANT! EEEEEK!! ))

☆ Idolized bliss. idol fetish galore, IDOL WORSHIP. ☆ TWICE, IM, and LL unite! (twicemania, idolmaster, love live, YOU NAME IT!!!)

As for my little vice, I do get a bit sex crazed sometimes, just throwing it out there

Dolls, especially porcelain ones, are my jam. Oh, so fine. vintage treasures, they catch my eye, and they're all MINEEE～～

Stalker extraordinaire, I study peeps and know them like the back of my hand. ( I can figure out what you're thinkiiinggg, kuku... )

I DIG BEING A GOOD DOG BOY 8-).. will ask for head pats or your finger to gnaw on!!! 🩸

HORROR JUNKIE and NOSEBLEED SEEKER, excitement brings the sane to a BOIL.

I'M MY FRIENDS DIE-HARD FOLLOWER.

If I hate your guts, you've got numbered days in this rain.

Visual novel fan, enjoying solitary time..

Love dissecting lives, peering inside, creatures in jars, teeth, hair, blood, it's all here dude!!

https://youtu.be/CwCrn4X_4ws?si=wC9-3_Ej190tCERy ( 聞くか聞かないか… )

🍰🫀 I'm like the Van Gogh of bloodshed.. 🩸The Hannibal Lecter of cupcake crafting, dedicated about baking cakes shaped like skulls or guts for shits and grins. 💼✏️✂️ Back into that computer screen abyss, hours wasted on my screen, my rear, butt glued to chair! 🦷 Passionate about collecting vintage medical specimens.🫀 Obsessed with the charm of vintage music gear. 🧠 On a quest to crush the rubiks cube in under a minute. 💊 📻 Self proclaimed rock paper scissors god and grilling, oh boy, I'm your guy!!!! (-ロωロ-)✧

No 'Do Not Interact' rules here, just don't be a pain in the rear END, that's all I ask for. Oh, and I tend to hornypost here and there. I also have a BIGG liking to all that is morbid, so if you won't tiptoe around my interest, maybe steer clear!!!! But if you're into that kind of stuff... WELCOME TO THE PAARTTY NETPALLLL <3.

That's it.. go home. ♡

[dorkicon]

📋 okay, I’ll take the bait. Favorite villains across all media, and why?

anon i have to be honest, i wasnt quite sure what to do with this one. i think i probably couldve added more, but this spread is already ridiculous enough as is. i also limited myself to just a few tf guys. lol.

erm...behold.

and just for the hell of it...i WILL tell you why!

TIER 1:

hal9000 (2001): canonically did nothing wrong. he was confused. technically a villain though i guess.

jason voorhees (friday the 13th. you know who jason is.): idk man hes just. hes cute to me. hes fun. you should read that texas chainsaw crossover where he makes friends with leatherface

rampage (beast wars): i am worlds number 1 crab defender. they expected him to become a monster, why was everyone so surprised when he turned out like one 🙄

TIER 2:

self explanatory if youve followed me for more than 3 seconds idk what more to add.

TIER 3:

deathsaurus (victory): sometimes it takes a man to be a failwife. idk i just really like his look. mister handsome.

TIER 4:

wesker (resident weevil): i love wesker. i have such a soft spot for villains who take their shit deathly seriously. COMPLETE. GLOBAL. SATURATION. i think i couldve put him in the bisexuality tier. lol

garthe (knight rider): david hasselhoff wore a fake moustache and goatee to play his evil twin. they just dont make tv like they used to.

cykill (gobots): megatron hardware running beast wars megatron software. why does he sound like that. also couldve gone in bisexuality tier but if i sat and explained it to you id sound insane

skeletor (he man): Skeletor.

cobra commander (gi joe): bisexuality already saved him in the gi joe animated movie idk. hes like if starscream led the cons and megatron was stuck as his sic. very funny scenario.

TIER 5:

char (gundam): watch chars counterattack if you dont know what im talking about here, i guess

magneto (xmen): hes another one whose villain status is...eeeh. but i like him. he and charles make up and kiss like every issue theyre in together. dont fact check that. just trust me.

dr doom (marvel): he carries a wallet sized picture of reed richards in the bifold he keeps in his idiot metal pants

ichijou (kaiji): well, considering how shit went for him, bisexuality couldnt have made it any worse.

TIER 6:

megatron (beast wars): i fucking love bwtron lol. particularly before the final season, where he has his little power trip. i think hes a lot of fun, and im perfectly happy not sympathizing with him. hes a bad guy n he loves it. so do i, lol.

dukat (star trek ds9): ugh dukat suuuucks. hes so smarmy and SO convinced hes in the right. so i love him hahhah. i think marc alaimo is just a wonderful actor too!

tsurumi (golden kamuy): i gotta admit, i think like...its really easy for "smart" villains to fall flat if the story isnt there to support them. luckly, golden kamuy fuckin rocks. and lt tsurumi is scary as hell lol

ash (alien): 'i cant lie to you about your chances...but you have my sympathies." ....AAAAAHHH!!! so cold. and cool. hes probably the scariest thing anyone can be...a capitalist.

AM (ihnmaims): huge fan of the voice work in the bbc audio drama honestly. such a misanthropic little freak. (big freak?)

TIER 7:

jungle hunter (predator 87): idc okay. he looked COOL. WOOHOO. what a fucking beautiful creature suit, right? and the face animatronics? good god.

Q (star trek tng): i think its funny how he fucks with picard okay. again, probably not a full villain. but its MY list.

honorable mentions:

sunder, straxus: well. i just forgot to add them until i already had the damn thing made okay

i almost added johan from monster and reinhard from lotgh but i reached my limit of blonde men already with char and wesker. ryo devilman was another casualty. edit: I ALSO COULDVE ADDED FUCKING OCELOT MGS

umm...oh, i dont know. hannibal. from hannibal.

[sweatywagonmakercroissant]

Silly Game Time: It's almost 2025. So what was you personal "Story of 2024"?

It could be a novel, film, show, or game. It can be one you experienced for the first time in 2024 (even if it was from an earlier year), or it can be one that you'd experienced before this year, but that you really likes or that typified the vibe of 2024 for you.

Oh my god,,

This is a really hard question because my hyperfixations change and go or appear at least every three weeks, so it's hard to track down which one is the one that had the most influence on me (below cut is all my rambling and yapping about fandoms i've liked, just know i love the maggotdom they're cool)

I'm gonna assume this is a jugement free zone, cause if it's not i'm fucked and need to delete my identity, going off my ao3 history, the category i read the most (going off how many pages do i have to skip to get to another fandom), i read, i think, an absurd number of Poolverine (wolverine/deadpool) fanfiction. Now am I happy with that ? ....

No ! I Am Ashamed.

I think next up would be House MD which... i mean yeah but i'm still uncomfortable, also i watched 5 seasons in two weeks and just thinking about it makes me a little ill

For context, i also cannot remember shit from this year, so any fandom i've been in is part of that memory black hole

I'm now gonna list some cool media i have enjoyed this year, and by that you should read it as : the ones i remember and have been reminded to me through ao3 history

- Dungeon meshi (delicious in dungeon), i like food

- Hades 1, i enjoy hot guys and women with weapons (haven't played the second, probably should at some point)

- Mouthwashing (oouuuaarrueeeggghhh), played it recently, very cool game, i need to sit down and maybe have an apple juice, also i don't really like horror games this one was good though (anya we love you)

- Hannibal the show ! I haven't watched it like at all i just like uh dubious romantic violence apparently (acab)

- Arcane ! Haven't finished it, love that one twink and the sad wet cat

-Interview With the Vampire the tv show ! Once again, dubious romantic violence but also vampires and canonical queer characters (madeleine and claudia iykyk ;-;) (armand consumed me momentarily at some point)

-The house in the cerulean sea (WOOOHOOOOO NEW BOOK DROPPING ????)

-SHERLOCK ???? Can't believe i got into this tumblr ass fandom, i was obsessed with them

- Dead Boy Detectives, the tv adaptation

If i had to choose one i'd say Interview With the Vampire was not only my preferred one but also the most influencial one for me of 2024, i had been waiting for a while to see it and i loved every minute of it, so my Story of the Year is Interview With The Vampire. The second place goes to Sherlock (goddammit).

Also, as a non official official story of the year would be Good omens, technically watched it in 2023 but it had a lot of influence on my 2024, because i joined the sub-fandom of the maggots (around february or something), led by mascot Asmi, or @weirdly-specific-but-ok . I met some cool people and it was a place of happiness and safety for me when i wasn't doing so good. Shout out to my mutual @friday-im-in-love-with-crowley and those who i'm afraid to tag who are also maggots (sadly, i'm anxious, but also it'd be rude), i love y'all dearly and though i don't know most of y'all, i appreciate your existence.

So yeah as usual wayyy to much rambling, i'm sorry silly game time runner

Tl;dr : it's interview with the vampire, but also i love asmi's fandom

[monsterblogging]

Okay, as long as I'm on this MCU Loki kick, I'm gonna share this Pacific Rim AU that's been floating around in my head. (Everyone is human here, btw.)

Loki and Thor were Jaeger pilots. For all they argued, they could still pilot a Jaeger together since they grew up doing all kinds of things together, and Loki was accustomed to adjusting to whatever Thor was doing. (Though, not so much the other way around, unfortunately.)

Their Jaeger was definitely more suited to Thor's strengths than Loki's, but Loki did his best to go along with it. They weren't like, bad or anything, but Thor still wasn't Loki's optimal partner, and Loki would have really done better in a different Jaeger.

Cue a big family fallout where Loki realizes he was """adopted""" under highly suspicious circumstances. This is basically the straw that breaks the camel's back and unleashes all the shit Loki's been repressing. He gets so fucking pissed that he walks out and disappears from the map for awhile.

Thor is of course upset that his brother has gone off to God knows where, and he's also really bummed out that he can't go smashing kaiju skulls anymore.

(Also I'm not gonna try to adapt the stuff with Thanos and the Chitauri army because there's no real equivalent to that in Pacific Rim. Like sure there's the kaiju and the Precursors, but the Precursors are very much not Thanos, and they don't need anybody to lead the kaiju into battle. The Black does not count, because it was not made by Guillermo del Toro or Travis Beacham.)

One day this guy Steve Rogers rolls into the Jaeger program. Steve isn't new; he was actually a Mark-1 pilot before, but he lost his partner pretty early on and dropped out.

And then, SURPRISE! Turns out Loki's never been far away at all; he's just working with some dude in the kaiju black market. (Doesn't have to be Hannibal Chau. Could be, but it doesn't have to be.) Dude sees Steve Rogers coming back and rolls up with heart eyes because Loki can suss out a drift compatible person from a thousand yards away (Loki: "What, like it's hard?"), and also. Steve's ass.

Steve, for his part, cannot believe he and Loki are drift compatible. No way. Like what the hell, Loki, you're a knife-throwing guy, and an absolute menace with a hanbo stick, my Jaeger was built with attack shields.

And Loki puts on The Eyes (OuO) and explains to Steve that he's quite adaptable, really and he can go along with whatever Steve's doing. And Steve's like "What's with that accent, aren't you from Minnesota?" and Loki's like "I'm from many places, darling." (Acute Theater Kid Disease, it's incurable.)

And meanwhile, Thor is like "Loki, pleeeeeaase come back and pilot our Jaeger" and Loki's like "pfffft no Thor you're dead to me."

And the marshal is like "for fuck's sake" and tries to pair Steve and Thor. But it turns out that Steve and Thor cannot hold a drift together because their fighting styles are just too different, and neither one of them can really adjust.

But fiiiiiiiinally things get Real Desperate and Steve's like "FINE I'll get in a Jaeger with you" and Loki's like "YIPPIE!!!!" and they get into a Jaeger and to Steve's surprise, Loki is actually a perfectly good partner. Oh sure he's occasionally thinking ~thoughts~ about Steve's delectable bodiliness, but something you learn at the Kodiak Academy is that you're gonna see some shit in your partner's head, and Thought Crimes Don't Real. (And Loki, for his part, really does try to avoid fixating on these thoughts in the Drift. He's a bastard, but he's not a fucking bastard.)

Loki really puts in an effort to match Steve's fighting style, and he's actually better with Steve than Thor, because Steve's fighting style is actually a little closer to Loki's than Thor's is.

Thor is of course all bummed because he wants to FIGHT KAIJU (so so so so so so much unburned ADHD energy here, folks), but not all is lost! The marshal is currently eyeing a gal in k-sci by the name of Jane Foster. Thor for his part is A Little Skeptical, but the marshal is pretty damn sure it will work. (He is Right. Never underestimate the rage of a scientist working under steadily diminishing funds.)

What happens next? I don't have anything specifically decided. Maybe Bucky returns and there's some Soap Opera Drama set off as Steve is torn between his current drift partner and his old drift partner, or maybe Bucky's like "oh well okay" and goes on to co-pilot with Sam Wilson. (Actually, I think I like the idea of Bucky with Sam better than the idea of Bucky with Steve.)

So yeah, that's about it. This scenario has been sitting around in my head for awhile and now that the Loki Fixation has been reawakened I figured I'd share it, lol.

[titleleaf]

Can you talk a bit about your introduction to the Hannibal Lecter tetralogy? Did you see any of the movies first or did you read the books and then watch the films? What drew you to the series initially?

Absolutely!

I was really really into Demme's Silence Of The Lambs as a preteen in the era where you could just turn on the TV and the same 20 movies would be playing on cable —it’s interesting to look back on those really naive viewings where I wasn’t really aware of the world enough to grasp the film’s themes around misogyny (or the turbo-problematic elements, never mind the literal edited-for-TV censorship) and also not really astute enough to grasp why Hannibal Lecter was supposed to be a frightening presence. Hopkins’ Hannibal is having so much fun in that movie and when you can’t really detect the layers of irony and cruelty at play it’s a really different film. (The big thing in hindsight that's strange is that I perceived the museum bug guys as much more threatening figures — and they certainly do represent an ambivalent part of Clarice’s experience moving through the world as a woman, including being flirted with when you're trying to investigate an active serial killer but Foster plays Clarice's responses to them very differently to me now. I also just took it as a given that Clarice and Ardelia were girlfriends, not in a “I ship it” way but where I didn’t understand how it would be intended otherwise. I do ship it now as an adult, ofc #clardeliahive.) Something about Hannibal's combination of prickly sparring and weird courtliness was a blast for me even at that young (and dumb) age. I watched the film Hannibal later, probably on one of the zillion illicit movie streaming sites that used to exist and only let you watch 45 minutes of video a day, pretty miffed at the actor change but enjoying the weird villain/heroine loyalty kink soooo much… cannot remember, for the life of me, when I picked up the film adaptation of Red Dragon but there's a nonzero chance it was because of a gifset of that stabbing scene back in, ugh, oh god, 2012? Still an absolutely delightful dynamic, ponytail and all. I'm meh on it as an adaptation of the novel RD now (the novel's grim ambivalent ending makes people so uncomfortable that it seems to be nerfed in every adaptation) but it really blew my little mind.

I was dubious of the NBC series when it was announced (as a big Clarice boi), then watched s1 and enjoyed it, then got as far in s2 as Beverly getting sliced up and bailed. I didn’t finish the series until some time last year, but I'm glad I came back when I did, having boned up on the books in the meantime. Some of my frustrations remain (short version, I do think the show’s writing has a sexism problem, and I'm never as enamored with Hannibal as the writing seems to be) but it’s still so compelling to me and it’s one of those things I can turn over and examine from a million angles. Also it is stacked with hotties from start to finish, and it introduced me to the finest wettest Will Graham. Brain chemistry-changing shit.

Books-wise, I think I read Hannibal Rising first, which is probably not the way people should engage with those books — I still think that book and its film adaptation have a lot of fun stuff going on with them, it’s just not necessarily… necessary. The rest of the books only came along for me after my most recent revival of interest in the NBC series. (Which… came about after I went completely off my shit about Primal Fear and joking with a buddy about Aaron Stampler's summer internship in Italy got me rewatching the 2002 Red Dragon film for the first time since college.) I think I was scared away by the way people talked about the book Hannibal, but it ended up being my second favorite of all four, it’s gonzo and turns up the Grand Guignol nastiness to 11 but it’s also terribly fun.

I was a latecomer to Manhunter also for similar reasons — people loved to call that movie cheesy or act like it was some strange early effort superceded by the obviously superior adaptation of a different book — but simply as cinema I think it’s the finest of all the film adaptations, and Demme's SOTL owes it a massive debt. Mann gives Dolarhyde a tragedy and a dignity that no adaptation is willing to give to Jame Gumb and I’m sore about that but also. Tom Noonan’s double-l Dollarhyde being the only blond Francis on film is so funny, and I love Will Graham's tiny purple shorts. I miss the things it cuts/changes, especially with the friction within Molly’s marriage and the location specificity of the book, but it also has such a wonderful encapsulation of what’s at the core of both Will and Clarice to me — you can’t save all of them, but you still have to try to save as many as you can. Brian Cox's Hannibal is his own beast, and really compelling.

The CBS Clarice procedural is such a fun idea but it gets so tangled up in rights issues and the CBS procedural-ness of it all that it really impedes things. Some of what it adds is brilliant imo (I love the character of Julia, a married trans lesbian in the 1990s corporate world who makes tough choices and brings a fun element of the novels’ boring RL forensics to the fore as well as exploring the in-universe consequences that Clarice's explosively well-televised confrontation with Gumb has for innocent people who have nothing else in common with a skin-stealing serial killer than being queer and societally despised) but other choices it makes are totally inexplicable. (Several questionable choices made wrt Catherine Martin, and also what the fuck are they doing with PAUL KRENDLER… it felt like a Mindhunter rehash, very much pejorative.) Other elements suffer from the absences dictated by the rights issues involved — not just no Hannibal Lecter but no Jack Crawford, no mention of Will Graham as the maimed and miserable failure-state for what Clarice is risking, no nothin'. I miss Jack! Also they just cannot commit to it being a full on 1990s period piece, which is a crying shame. If it were on another network, or made by a different team, it could have been really great, but it’s ultimately a frustrating watch for totally different reasons than NBC Hannibal is a frustrating watch.

I also listened to the musical parody of Silence Of The Lambs a lot in college and it's still major earworm material ten years later. I'm just trying to mind my own business and blammo, it's If I Could Smell Her Cunt on mental loop.

[the-rad-pineapple]

I’m obsessed with la douleur exquise, and I just have to ask what gave you the idea to write it? Did it just pop into your head one day? Dud someone say something? Were you watching/reading something?

It’s genuinely so good, and you write it so well.

You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want, but I wanted to tell you again how much I love your story.

💜🕸️

first of all, holy shit, never gotten an ask about one of my stories before, so i am jumping off the walls rn, oh my god!!

here is the link to the fic.

secondly, thank you so, so, SO much! like, seriously this means so much to me that you like my story so much. it's been such a struggle to write. i've been working on it since october, but there was a period of about 4 months where i didnt touch it at all. i still have some of it left to complete, and i even wrote for it earlier today. i'm almost finished with the last chapter.

but, to actually answer your questions, i only just started watching Hannibal in july and finished the entire series in august. i then became completely hyperfixated on it. like, i have not had a new hyperfixation like this since 2019. it completely took over my life, and all i could was think about them.

so i think it was around this time that i started to get ideas for la douleur exquise. at first, it was just little scenes and scenarios that mainly involved Will going full feral. somehow, the setting became the bshci, and the feral Will scene was born. i remember when i got the idea to have the red lighting while Will was on a killing spree. all of those visuals were heavily inspired by songs by Apashe and 1nonly.

i actually played around with a lot of different ideas for it. originally, all of the patients were going to fight each other to the death, and Will was going to pose the bodies like the Ripper to tell the story of his love for the Ripper. i had some ideas of how Will would use the bshci kitchen for his kills. he also would've been the last one alive. but that was way too much work because i'd want to do a lot more detail with each kill and each corpse arrangement that i just did not have the patience for with this story.

i had no plans to write this as an actual story until i wrote Will's love confession to Hannibal (which actually isn't posted quite yet). i wrote it on my phone on a blank google doc when i was high and then reread it when i was sober and knew i had to write the fic. so, i crafted a narrative that allowed Will to go completely unhinged so i could have that one feral Will scene (i actually had the fic title "will on a killing spree as a treat" for the longest time). and that's usually how a lot of my fics are written; i'll get one scene or idea and then go from there.

[pearwaldorf]

oh my god this fucking show.

*slaps roof of coffin* We can fit so many kinds of emotional ruin in this baby! I do not think I have seen a show tear down everything it built like this since Hannibal's S2 finale. But it's not tragic in the same way. This is the gleeful destruction of a kid building elaborate structures out of blocks so they can knock them over.

God, Jacob's acting has been so fucking good this season but this episode was just. Armand sitting there in the crypt listening to Louis go mad with grief and starvation. The absolute mindless ferity when he's planning his revenge, and how much vicarious satisfaction you get from hearing the screaming as the flames ignite.

(I watched a little bit of the bts after the episode and Ben Daniels is so fucking delighted to get his prop head chopped off. The glee in his voice when Jacob sends him that pic is the cutest shit.)

Daniel is such an interesting homewrecker. That bit in ep 5 where he has to go back to his own book to retrieve his previous words. I think he would have fucked up his life even without Louis's admonition/command/whatever. But there's always that little bit of doubt and I think it would have haunted him if he'd remained mortal.

And it's fascinating to see him poke and prod even after he's gotten the story from both Louis and Armand. All those inconsistencies that seemed inconsequential but then lead to something significant. I wouldn't even call it misdirection, just using new information to interrogate the text from the correct perspective (har har). And you can see the trepidation when he pulls out the script, knowing what's going to happen, but it's not just his job to excavate the truth, it's his calling. All characters have a bit of a writer (or writing team) in them, but Daniel feels invested with a lot of affection from people who understand his line of work.

Armand. Oh god, Armand. This show is neo-puritan kryptonite in the best way. The narrative never excuses Armand's actions, heinous as they are, but it also makes it difficult to villainize him for it. He is so, so fucked up and broken it's more sad than anything else. (I don't think it even gets to the level of tragic, because tragedy is too dignified for his motivations. I mean this descriptively, not pejoratively.)

Louis and Lestat making up in a rickety-ass old house in New Orleans during a hurricane is not exactly light symbolism, but it is extra af in a way that is very them.

Random things:

How long has Lestat been plunking at that wooden "keyboard"? Those finger marks are deep.

"Did you hurt yourself?" 😭😭😭

Louis's goofy-ass tourist outfit with the Saints ballcap lmao

I want to know the circumstances of Daniel's vamping. He just blew up Armand's entire life. Was it retaliatory? Armand has never made a fledgling until now. I am so curious to see why now. (Also he's gonna fuck that old man and I'm so happy for them both.)

Absolutely the first thing I would do if I became a vampire is change my eye color, just because.

[quietwingsinthesky]

"stop voting for gabriel gabriel is Not cool he’s a dork" tbf, my definition of "cool" has never seemed to align with what others consider "cool". my definition of "cool" usually requires some level of autism around dinosaurs and/or animals in general (GODS I love weird animal trivia and Jurassic Park did something to my brain chemistry my dad taking small child me to see it in theaters was a Mistake) which none of the archangels seem to display much of. the closest is Gabe with the little dog in his first ep.

(Jurassic Park example, actually. Alan Grant is the coolest mf in that movie and I'm p sure it's supposed to be Malcolm.) "look at how that dude dresses! how he acts! so cool!" "fascinating, but what is his favorite Star Trek series." I'm too autistic to understand whatever constitutes "cool" conventionally I guess. Hannibal is fine I like him but Will, with his dog obsession and deep desire to be Left The Fuck Alone, and then becoming unhinged over the series? very cool of him.

"this angel is a tyrant in favor of the apocalypse" deeply uncool. "this angel is a hedonistic coward that likes to victimize abusers" well, the bar is pretty low… (which isn't to say I think that deeply uncool (imo) character trait makes them a bad character in general, I just can't associate them with "cool-ness".)

oh but also? "any excuse to think about lucifer being a slut #literally let me run a train on him until he’s mindbroken. that would fix him." ur right ur so right and it's very sexy of u to say.

(godfather voice) You come into my house, on the day my daughter's to be married, and you ask me to accept not only raphael slander, but ian malcolm slander??? HANNIBAL SLANDER??????????

no, no, it's fine. i see all these guys as pretty equally weird and autistic. i mean, ian malcolm is described as a rockstar of a mathematician for a reason, this is his Thing, you know? he thinks flirting via explaining his mathematical theory is hot. i'm really not sure you could claim he's not fascinated by the dinosaurs, given that they're his vehicle to prove his theory correct, that he's the one in the book who takes note of their population growth and figures out that the park is going to get out of human control very quickly. (as far as I remember, it's been a few years since i revisited it.) sorry wait this isn't ian malcolm defense squad time. and we don't have time to get into hannibal lmao.

BUT. i will not be accepting raphael slander ever forever. incorrect. they lay out their reasoning for the apocalypse very clearly in 5x03, how they have watched every monstrous thing that has occurred in human history and only been able to come to the conclusion that god has to be dead, because otherwise he couldn't have allowed it to happen. the apocalypse is a promised escape from pain. and then, of course, castiel's resurrection in the s5 finale alongside the apocalypse being cancelled tells them only one thing: that god is alive and he just. let all that shit happen. let it happen to the world, let it happen to raphael. now, gabriel is dead, michael and lucifer are in the cage, god is still mia, and castiel. it doesn't actually matter what castiel believes because he's become the face of all of that. it's an impossible position to be in, and archangels are, as a rule, not very good at changing course. raphael is alone, and raphael has decided to self-destruct. i just wish the writers actually gave a shit about them so they could have leaned into what is one of the coolest arcs of disillusionment with god and grasping at any measure of control when the one stable thing you've based your whole life on has been yanked out from under you.

and gabriel is deeply uncool. that's the point! he's not a hero of the people, taking out evildoers in funny ways. he's a deeply petty, incredibly self-serving asshole who still carries the belief that, as an archangel, he gets to decide what's right and wrong, who lives and who dies, and how much pain he gets to cause them before they do. he's all for the apocalypse until it starts messing with his things. his eventual stand against lucifer isn't righteous, it's a dozen insults lashing out as his older brother, trying to hurt him as much as he possibly can because lucifer hurt gabriel first. and he dies because he is still too much like lucifer. he's still playing the same tricks lucifer taught him to. cause what's the apocalypse but a much larger version of gabriel's game, right? one angel who decided humanity as a whole was rotten and needed to be wiped out against another angel who has spent the past few centuries taking out his issues on whatever jerk crosses his path. like, really, the difference is that lucifer is out to get Results. gabriel likes fucking with people, but he doesn't want the status quo to change because that would mean no more people to fuck with.

first and foremost, gabriel is a dickhead whose shots sometimes hit their mark. i love him so much, he's so awful.

[anachronistic-falsehood]

OK NOW THAT YOUVE OFFICIALLY FINISHED HANNIBAL I CAN TELL YOU MY MASON VERGER STORY. OH MY GOD. so . back when i first watched hannibal i was liveblogging my experience over discord chats with aster since shes the one who recommended it to me . ok. and this was myyyy senior year of college so i was ENTRENCHED in marine biology type courses ok. i specifically had a class on aquarium exhibit design and i was going a little bit insane abt it because my professor sucked. anyway. i an rambling. so i see mason vergers motherfucking eel tank and i go NUTS about it.

THAT THING IS SO GODDAMN EMPTY. EELS NEED SHIT TO HIDE IN AND HE IS KEEPING THEM IN THE AQUARIUM EQUIVALENT OF A CEMENT BRICK. oh it made me so mad. notice the timestamp too this was like. near-midnight sleep deprived madness. theres like a whole rant about enrichment along with this that im not including bc it spanned the course of like 3 hours.

AND THEN . HE FUCKING GOT EATEN BY THE EELS. AND I FELT THE STRONGEST DAMN SENSE OF RETRIBUTION EVER SPECIFICALLT BECAUSE ONE OF THE EELS GOES INTO HIS MOUTH. I WAS LIKE . THATS WHAT YOU GET BITCH. you become the hide hole for them now.

now you think this would be the end of my insanity. you underestimate my power. that goddamn eel tank lived in my head RENT FREE and it makes me SO MAD every single time i rewatch hannibal. and aster has to suffer because i bring it up so much bc i think its hilarious

<< these are from my second hannibal rewatch which i think is hilarious because its almost exactly a year after i finished watching it yhr first time. i swear i didnt do that on purpose but its REALLY funny

also at my last job we had a moray eel and we would regularly dive in the tank with her so i got a lot of Real Actual Eel Welfare experience so every once in a while id just say shit like this

anyway. thats the eel saga . every day i am thinking about mason vergers eel tank and the fact that his death is so fucking perfect to me specifically for this insane reason . eel retribution forever

OH MY GOD. MAC THAT IS HILARIOUS. OF COURSE U WOULD GO INSANE OVER AN EEL TANK THIS IS SO MAC CORE!!! i may not be a marine biologist but i knew those little guys were not being kept in a proper tank and it was killing me and i also felt sooooo fucking happy over his death like FUCK YES. FUCK YES. KILL HIM. GET FUCKED BOY!!!!!! i was so happy 2 see him dead. holding ur hand rn mac we both hate mason verger and loved seeing him get murdered by his sad mistreated eels <3 EEL RETRIBUTION FOREVER!!!!!!

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Do you think there's a connection between the 80s and 90s comics mostly only mentioning him offhand without actual appearances and modern comics like Twojar or One Bad Day making him more violent and increasingly taking away his gimmick ? Because I feel like it's two different approaches to the same idea of wanting to have a villain whose thing is being 'smart' on hold in case they want a story where Batman shows off his mental capabilities but not wanting to deal with everything else that comes with the character like the goofyness or having to come up with riddles that don't suck

oh man okay this is such an interesting question and I'm so excited to be able to revisit it when my reread gets into the 2000s and have more perspective to offer

for the time being I do think that it's fair to say that making the Riddler a central antagonist in a story is challenging because he has, like, a relatively narrow gimmick compared to a lot of other rogues and having to actually come up with riddles is a tall order that a lot of writers simply don't want to fuck with.

personally I think the best way to embrace this is to just acknowledge that the riddles are going to be balls to the wall stupid and let the audience understand that Batman is equally unhinged for being able to solve them at all. Batman '66 is frankly great at this, best exemplified in this scene from the movie that no other Batman adaptation has topped yet:

what are any of you talking about! you sound crazy! they are right though, and that's what living in Gotham does to a motherfucker.

for the record I think Batman Forever also actually does this really well without being quite as unhinged. the riddles are actually pretty solid and straightforward; Bruce solves them easily but the real challenge is in putting them together at the end to figure out who's actually behind everything. (it's Jim Carrey, serving cunt.) it's maybe the only part of the movie that actually shows any restraint at all, and I respect that.

the thing is that this approach kind of falls apart if you want to do a more grounded take on Batman that presents the Riddler as the legitimate threat despite being a man who on purpose calls himself the Riddler. I dog on Batman 2022 a lot but at least there you can (charitably) read Paul Dano's shitty little puzzles as being intentionally messy owing to the fact that his Riddler is, you know, a sopping wet miserable catholic redditor who's really just trying to kiss Batman. I do genuinely like that his master plan is incoherent enough that Bruce doesn't crack all of it and misses vital pieces, it's a nice spin on an inexperienced Batman + the complexity addiction that Riddler schemes are so known for.

and like, to be clear, I do still think that Riddler sucks, but other attempts to make him a serious antagonist are so much worse. you mentioned War of Jokes and Riddles and One Bad Day, the latter of which I do think is just. appallingly misguided on literally every imaginable front and betrays an embarrassing lack of understanding of what people actually like and find entertaining about the character in favor of scrubbing him down to a bog standard Hannibal Lecter-flavored evil genius serial killer manipulator.

which is a fine stock character, where would comic books be without easily recognizable bad guy archetypes, etc, but god, not the Riddler. where the fuck is the fun in that? he's just a silly little guy in a leotard. please, stop trying to make this guy scary.

for god's sake. he's just a baby.

anyway I get why it happens though and it's Marketing, and I think specifically the very online and instantaneous nature of fandom in the 21st century. detective comics comics needs people reading their comics and, maybe even more importantly, talking about their comics, and that means leaning really heavily on well-established characters the people give a shit about. most readers are going to be more interested, even passively, in the Riddler than Random Smart Guy Murderer #623, because he's been around for a long time and he's a very ingrained part of the lore.

but everything has to be a fucking event with high stakes now, again because attention is currency, so it can never just be, like, "oh no, the Riddler has Batman trapped in a giant hamster maze," it's the Riddler and the Joker beefing and also the Riddler murdering Kite-Man's son for ??? reasons ??? idk man look how fucked up he is! this guy's serious! he has a question mark scar on his chest! please take him seriously!

and also, back to the first point, it's frankly just easier to write a generic egomaniac smart guy than it is to come up with riddles that are even a little bit good or interesting enough to carry an entire plot. I bet Tom King really thought he was doing something when he settled down to write One Bad Day and decided that the riddles were actually just a fucking power inhibitor the Riddler was putting in place to stop his massive brainmeat from killing everybody he came in contact with, but I think it's actually the sign of Tom King being a lil punk bitch, actually. just admit you don't have the sauce to come up with a riddle and pass the gig onto someone else!

anyway this is why most of my favorite Riddler appearances have him in a supporting role rather than serving as a primary antagonist (think Batman: Unburied, King Tut's Tomb, the Long Halloween/Dark Victory/When In Rome triptych), and his best antagonist appearances have him working with WAY lower stakes that's mostly just trying to get Bruce to pay attention to him (Vol. 2 of the Batman Adventures and Strange Love Adventures 2022).

tl;dr stop trying to make me take this man seriously

[somebodyhelpthenotdeadfreds]

I am actively having more of a reaction than I did to the crowley and aziraphale kiss photo leak. This whole time I've been like are they gonna kiss are they gonna say I love you if they don't that's so them if they do how will it be done and I swear to god and Jesus Christ god almighty HOLY HELL THIS IS INSANELY GOOD DWHHDWGDYWDGY.

you. are. my. season. 4.

this is how it should be done. When they were doing their fight foreplay I was like holy shit it'd be so cool if they kissed and I didn't expect them to actually kiss when I tell you I had to set my computer down and scream into my pillow and then stim for like 4 minutes I am not exaggerating this goes crazy. AND THEN WE GOT THE

"look at me, please"

"I love you"

"I love you"

and top will also and the way you write them having sex is so perfect I had no idea if I was gonna get smut or not (I didnt bother to read all the tags bc it was a rec) and the way you write it is perfect how do you get them so well like are you secretly a joint account run by Baltimores favorite murder husbands because this is just to good

Oh my god, literally the sweetest thing to compare me in any way to Neil Gaiman's work. He's been an influence on me for sure (wrote a very long Hannibal/American Gods crossover back in the day) and making that comparison made my whole MONTH.

I also don't write smut almost ever but it just fit here, they haven't been able to touch each other in months, either sex wise or biting wise or both, as in the fic. I just think they're neat. And my favorite genre of Hannigram fic is one of them being jealous and killing for the other. Hits every single time, that's my personal niche to write in, and I wrote a BACK CATALOGUE of them while I was avoiding college life. They're my favorite little guys.

Your words are so sweet!

[hannibutts]

HANNIBAL SPOILERS S02E07

Miriam be TRAUMATISED but why did Hannibal keep her alive and where and how does she still look relatively healthy? Oh and conveniently she doesn’t remember that it was Hannibal.

Wait, did Hannibal turn her? Like is she his little sleeper agent or something?

In what world do they let Alana officially interview Hannibal especially after being his alibi.

Oop, Miriam said it wasn’t Hannibal. I’m calling it now - she’s working for Hannibal or is traumatised into submission or some shit.

JESUS CHRIST Why is the intro so fucking bright, I’m watching this in the dark and it just blinded the shit out of me

BABYGIRL yay! I have to admit - in my perusing of tumblr for Chilton stuff without being spoilt, I came across a Chilton/Will fanfic (CHILLYWILLY?? Really guys? Wilton was RIGHT THERE) and even though I know and want end game Will/Hannibal, this one fic was really good and made me kinda into the idea.

So right now when I saw Chilton going to Will’s cell I was like oh myyyyy before I remembered that it was just a fic 😅

Wow they’re letting Will out that quick huh? What are the chances he’s going to run directly to Hannibal even after trying to kill him?

Oh god, is baby girl really next or is will just trying to scare him? Look at his scared little face 😭

“Why did Hannibal not just kill you?”

“Because he wants to be my friend”

See that’s a funny line but the implications to babygirl are terrifying oh god, something bad is coming isn’t it??

Jack trying to make amends with Will - I mean at least he’s got a couple of allies with him now that they somewhat believe Hannibal could be the ripper. Oh wait how much time has passed??? Like when is that crazy ass Hannibal v Jack fight happening - are you telling me this has all happened within the 12 week span??? How long was Will imprisoned for??

Aaaaand Will is barely out and Jack has already taken him to a crime scene.

Mmmhmm - Miriam is for sure a sleeper agent. Oh man, what if there’s other evidence that points to Chilton being the ripper and that’s how Hannibal is going to get babygirl?

Aw Will is going to see his dogs again.

Boooo Alana, wait why is she all pissy at him? She literally turned her back on him and for what? To touch Hannibal’s murder wing wang? Haaaaa Will is reading her the rights with a smile. Good.

Oh fuck all the way off Alana.

BabyGirl hooray! He’s so awkward and desperate, I love him your honour.

The funny thing is Chilton IS quite smart, and in another scenario he would be the smartest one in the room, but not when everyone is a serial killer like in this show. I like that he’s calling out jack for turning on Will too, like jack is acting all high and mighty and protective of Will but he was the shittiest one to him.

Rara acting his heart out at the end there.

Ah so Will had the same idea as Chilton to see if he could recover Miriam’s memories.

Ok first. Hannibal could smell Will. I’m aware that he could do this but him acknowledging it was something. Second - Hannibal seemed almost giddy that Will was in his house. Thirdly - Hannibal genuinely looked scared when he saw Will looking unhinged holding the gun. And the conversation was fucking nuts because Hannibal never admitted to anything but also told Will that it was either - kill an innocent man or never get answers. I can honestly say I fucking love this show.

Ooh taking Miriam to Hannibal’s office… I’d be scared for Jack if we didn’t know he and Hannibal have a brawl at some point soon.

Hannibal is pretty confident how much he fucked Miriam up if he’s not scared that she’s actually going to remember.

The FBI are literally throwing darts in the dark now. And just because Chilton used scapolamine - his name is now in the hat too. Thanks Alana (Booooooo)

Chilton’s house is much more swanky than I would have guessed. I mean I guess it makes sense because he wants to seem sophisticated but by the style of suits he wears - I would have thought his house would have been more garish for some reason?

Oh no… ominous beeping in baby girls house Dang his house is super swank.

Something’s flatlining OH SHIT IS THAT GIDEON?? IN HIS HOUSE? Hannibal the scamp is FRAMING framing Chilton. They for sure dyed Rara’s eyebrows - that is the darkest I’ve ever seen them, I think they’re usually blondish or like a light brown or something.

Aw man I don’t want to see Rara as a horror damsel tripping over shit 😭 HANNIBAL IS THERE??? Bahahaha he’s doing his “I frew up” stance again 😂

“When you wake up, your only choice will be to run” wait so is Hannibal going to let Chilton live? I mean I figured considering he’s in the third season but like why? Oh shit Hannibal is going to open the door to the fbi agents?? Oh shit oh shit oh shit he’s going to kill them and frame Babygirl.

How does Hannibal not leave evidence from his hair and face being exposed. If Gattaca taught us anything it’s that we leave behind hair and skin cells everywhere no?

Ok so leaving Chilton covered in blood, with a gun in one hand, a knife in the other is pretty funny. It would have had the same effect to leave a note saying “i did it. Love, Frederick “babygirl” Chilton” 😂😂

Oooh his swanky apartment is all covered in blood, guts and butts now. It must have been very freeing for Hannibal to just frenzy murder without worrying about cleanup. The music in this scene is very reminiscent of the bongos bit of the twilight zone theme song.

RUN, YOU PATHETIC MEOW MEOW

NO, NOT TO WILL’S HOUSE??!!! HE HAS NO LOYALTY TO YOU, FOOL!!!

They really make the fbi look like bumbling fools huh? Like only taking into account what’s in front of them at that moment and dismissing everything else that has come before it. Look at Jack thinking he’s finally cracked the case 🙄

“There are corpses on my property, you just threw up an ear” 😂😂😂

Aw I just want to give baby girl a hug, of course Will called Jack but at least he told Babygirl he’s going to catch Hannibal oh my god, look at babygirls little betrayed face 😭😭😭

Even pointing a gun at Will - he looks so sad and Jesus Will standing up all confidently despite having a gun aimed at him is something… even with his curly mullet thing he has going on.

I don’t get Will here.. is he genuinely trying to protect Chilton or is it to keep one of the few people that knows Hannibal is the ripper on side? And he doesn’t try very hard to stop Jack from grabbing Chilton. Will… seems detached?

Oh babygirl now you run?

Man, Laurence fishburne is quite spry running through the scrub and snow… or maybe he just seems spry in comparison to Chilton who’s disparately stumbling though.

Aw. Chilty like a big weepy baby 😭

“It seems like one final indignity” it sure does, why the fuck is Alana interviewing Chilton?? She’s literally fucking the other suspect that they were supposed to pick up??? Oh my god, Hannibal murder wing wang must be outstanding if Alana is this blindly vitriolic. Jesus.

Good, you get a lawyer, baby girl.

Oh shit is Miriam having a seizure. Well how in the hell did Hannibal convince Miriam it was Chilton??

OH FUCK SHE JUST SHOT CHILTON IN THE FACE. WHAT THE FUCK?? How is Chilton in the third season?? I swear to god if it’s only in flashbacks!

Back to Hannibal and his Francine smith lips. Knock at the door - it’s going to be Will isn’t it? He can’t fucking help himself

Oh Will cut his mullet off and is all clean and ready for their date.

H “Do you intend to point a gun at me?”

W “Not tonight”

W “are you expecting someone?”

H “only you”

Stahhhhp you guys, you’re making me blush.

How is it possible that Mads is conveying absolute giddy happiness but remaining stoic?

Wait so Miriam DID kill Babygirl??? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 like I realise she shot him in the face but still RARA

Haaaa look at Hannibal’s face when Will says he wants to resume his therapy. Picture is 100 percent legit and has not been doctored 😃

So Will is going to battle it out with Hannibal… ok. I’m into it. I wonder if Hannibal is going to break it off with Alana now that he has Will back.

10/10 episode. I still have hope Rara is in the third season properly I will even take a wedged in twin brother plot line over Chilton being dead.

[squeiky]

I can’t believe there aren’t more vampires like me smh.

Like.. theoretically, if I were a vampire, I would suck your blood from your wrist like a gentlemen, and it’ll be so subtle that it looks like I’m simply kissing your hand. I’d do a quick nibble on your cheek every time do a “cheek kiss” when I greet you. You wouldn’t even realize, I’d be like a mosquito.

And when we come to meet, it’ll be when it’s dark and rainy, and we’ll stroll along the night where only the lanterns and streetlights can follow us.

And you’ll ask why I’m never seen in the daytime, and I’ll be all “that because you shine brighter in the dark” and that when it’s dark no body goes out to beaches, and I’ll wrap you in my big as cloak (which is totally not (<- lies) my big bat wings) to protect you from the harsh winds. THATS when you get all personal and shit. Like it’s dark so no one is looking at your bat stuff, and yeah sure I’m “cold blooded” or whatever you fuckers call it but I also wear something called “clothes” for decency and of fucking course I’d carry extra little sweaters or wear something warm so you lots can snuggle in it, because turns out, these guys get cold easily.

Plus I like snacks!! Snacks you fool! Of course I’d grab my grub in different places on you. Why is it always the neck on media guys?? I mean have you seen the mosquitoes- those guys’ll literally bite you in-between the asscheeks. You think I couldn’t fucking do that?

I just happen to have taste, and different standards, but I bet you for sure there’s some horny ass vampire somewhere having the time of their life behind a bar or something. Y’all act like the neck is the only parts of the body where there’s blood, and I’m just grazing the skin!! Who knows what weird shit goes on with surgeons.

And I happen to not enjoy making a big bloody mess, but I know very much that others would. Hell, I’ve been watching those food channels lately (like you know the ones with all the blood? Like Hannibal or something idk) and like you guys have so much fucking blood in that little canister of a body. And you can be my freind? Win win!

Oh and btw? Yeah if you got a blood condition, soomeee of us can tell- BUT I fucking can’t so you bet your ass i going to ask you what blood type are you and all that shit under the guise of trying to figure out what a “horoscope” is (it’s the personality test stuff I think) and like please for the love god tell your vampires because I don’t want to accidentally hurt you guys when I find out your bleeding actually hurts you and it’s not like a temporary thing I can just suck on for a bit then walk smoothly away? (Also you all taste different, some of you are sweetish but I like bitter ones.)

Shit I just reread that first part uhh this is a tangent and completely irrelevant now huh. Whoopsie! My sincerest apologies op.

so obviously drinking blood from someone's neck is incredibly homoerotic, it's a classic for a reason

but someone drinking from your wrist? getting to look at them as they sink their teeth in your skin?? being able to watch as their eyes flutter close and they barely hold back their instincts to devour you whole??? Being just as enthralled by that sight as they are by your taste???? hello?????