#also gonna try and see where I can make things simpler since I know I do offer a lot of options to choose from

[mcnuggyy]

Just saw a really cool concept someone has on their commission sheet called “dealers choice” where you essentially just pay the artist to finally work on a project/piece they’ve been wanting to work on but haven’t had the time/resources and honestly I might add that to my sheet like!!! I think it would be awesome to have someone pay me 100$ or whatever to work on a page of C♡C or draw my silly guys and maybe even let them suggest something while still just letting me do my thing, like idk!! It’s like old school art patron shit I love it <3

[briebysabs]

Since I am such a normal individual I’ve decided to attempt breaking down vanoé’s character song “Le Formidable”. I don’t hear much talk about it but the lyrics are just as cryptic and wild as the OP/ED.

Before we get into it, in terms of translation, I could only find one on YouTube that thankfully color-coded the lyrics so I could decipher who sings what. If anyone has any other translations, I’d love to know please. So a bunch of the lines you can kinda figure out who’s singing but here’s how it’s gonna be:

Vanitas =💙

Noé =💜

Vanoe= 💙💜

Simple enough let’s get into it :)

💜: /I want to stay in bed feeling the warmth of the sun and drift in and out of this sweet dream/

Already we’ve mentioned dreaming, a running theme in this song. There is the well-known line Teacher says in chapter 55...

Sleeping, specifically in regards to Noé, is something mochijun makes the audience take note. He can’t sleep without holding something. When he can’t fall asleep, it is highlighted like the night Vanitas rejected Noé drinking his blood. He doesn’t want Vanitas to disappear and I personally like how in the recent chapter, Vanitas stays by his side for a while. Almost like callback to that moment on the train but I’m getting carried away. You get the correlation I’m making, it’ll get very important later on.

We also have those warmth and sun connections to Noé, a large part of his character and Vanitas’ gravitation towards him.

💙: /With this grey weather today, this day will go by without any harmony/

We see Vanitas’ pessimistic outlook on life; grey, cloudy, devoid of color. Devoid of comfort and obviously these two contrasting people will clash but mix together throughout the song.

💜: /Tarte Tatin, Altus Paris! Endless interesting things!/

💙: /It’s always like this! Here and there, endlessly losing sight./

This seems pretty straightforward, Noé is getting distracted by all the wonderful things as usual and Vanitas chastises him. But let’s frame this another way, Noé is choosing to not focus. It’s simpler that way. He’s turning his focus elsewhere to better things, more pleasant things. And Vanitas is trying to wake him up. I’ll explain more in my theory soon.

💜: /What to look for today from this city/

💙: /Ah with all these things/

💙💜: /There is no time to rest/

Simple lyrics here. No comment.

💙💜: /Le formidable! Le formidable! It’s really easy. Just colliding, rolling down, and repeating again/

Here we are entering the chorus. There’s a common thread of repetition in every OP and ED in VnC. Like clockwork, these two have fallen into this pattern.

Colliding- Vanoé meeting, two worlds learning how to come together, joining as one

Rolling down- their downfall, incoming despair and tragedy

Repeating again- they find themselves back where they started, fated to be born and to die

Let me say the first part of my theory and keep this in the back of your head while remembering the lyrics: VnC is not a time loop in the traditional sense but rather a loop of memories. Also keep in mind the first ED Zero: “Now I remember, oh I have never lived a day without you. Untie the layer of memories...”

💙: /This worthless-/

💜: /wonderful-/

💙💜: /world we are walking on. Even not knowing is sometimes nice, right?/

Again, vanoé with different outlooks on life meet each other. But more importantly, we see the display of ignorance or blissful unawareness. We the audience have a vague idea on how this story ends and in a way, so do they. Vanitas knows very well he is doomed and has already entrusted Noé to end his life if it comes to it. But we also don’t know the specifics of their downfall and neither do they.

So this line has a double meaning that refers to the characters and the reader. As yeah it is nice to read vnc and enjoy the happy moments without knowing the painful details of what’s to come.

💜: /Over there something is flapping their wings/

💙: /And these uncountable days pass by. It’s not worth worrying about. So many unknown things, without meaning/

💜: /Escalier! I want to see the bright colors beyond!/

Noé, again giving his attention to supposedly insignificant things as Vanitas tends to see the larger picture, not caring for the mundane. Uncountable days can be matched with the grey weather mentioned earlier. But that also means things are murky, blur together, cloudy. They don’t make sense to Vanitas (such as love, his self-worth, the nature within people) while Noé wants to experience all the brightness of the world.

💙: /I told you to be quiet today, yet here we are!/

💜: /Now you loud person!/

💙💜: /I told you I hardly have time to breathe/

So, hypothetical scenario if we take this song literal: Vanoé is exploring the city because Noe wanted to Vanitas couldn’t say no. Vanitas is fed up and Noé thinks his complaints are aggravating. But this part shows a lack of understanding. They’re yelling about their own hardships but don’t see the other’s perspective.

💙💜: /Le formidable! Le formidable! It’s a simple thing. It’s just finding, losing sight and repeating again/

💜: /I want to dream/

💙: /It’s just a dream/

💙💜: /The world keep walking while not knowing the truth at this point/

Ok there’s a lot to dig our teeth in here. First of all, the finding, losing sight, repeating is another way of describing the colliding and rolling down said prior. Vanoe find each other, they lose each other, it’s fated to happen all over again. Now the big piece here, I want to dream/It’s just a dream. Surface-level interpretation > another instance of their differences. Noé wants be surrounded by dreams and wonder. While Vanitas looks at that beauty and scoff at it, since it isn’t real therefore not worth caring for. But if we read into this carefully, Noé wants to dream. He wants to stay in these memories, he doesn’t want to live in a world without Vanitas.

Let’s go back to OP 1: “I love this world and the light only you give me.”

We know OP 1 is Noe’s POV so let’s ask ourselves why would the Noé we are seeing, the one smiling at all the colors of the world say Vanitas is the only light he has (emphasis on “only”). Because the Noé singing the first OP is operating with far more knowledge and despair. We don’t know the truth at this point. “This world” is not real.

Allow me to offer what I think is happening. Noé and Vanitas meet, they go on this journey of understanding, trust, and love, Vanitas reaches his end and is killed by Noé. Noé lives on. We can tell the Noé writing this story is full of regret and sadness. But why is he writing this all down? He’s retelling the memories, putting them down physically on paper. Two things happened:

a) He exchanged his name with Naenia, wishing to remain in a world with Vanitas in it. Because that wish is still very present, Naenia has great interest in Noé. She mentions seeing him before in Louis but it could be a classic mochijun misdirect and it’s actually from receiving his name in a different iteration. There is that official art with Noé wearing Vanitas’ coat with that goat entity he saw in Gevaudan, pinned to his vest.

However this can only work if Naenia is still around and isn’t resolved/defeated in the memoirs.

b) This is more likely in my opinion. Noé uses the Books and the memoirs act as a catalyst for him to have the world become his memories or for him to live in them. I know only those with blue blood or something can use the books.

Which is why Dr. Moreau had those experiments with Vanitas and Misha. Don’t worry, I already have a theory that Archivistes are some form of blue moon vampires but that is a whole other discussion. Point is, I think the Books of Vanitas are like an Elliot sword situation. Yes, Elliot owns the Nightray sword and carries it around but you don’t know its true purpose in the story until Leo wields it.

Noé causes these memories to replay, perhaps to save Vanitas or simply to dream again. Go back to when he was last happy. But here’s the thing, the Noé in this memory is unaware or ignorant of this, sees his present world as the real one and undergoes the events of the series. Vanitas dies, he lives on, and creates a memory world for himself. Rinse, recycle, repeat. Essentially, the first ED gave it away. The entirety of VnC is a layer of memories. Even the narrator Noé we are hearing is a memory that is trying to manifest a world of his own.

Reality and dreams are all intertwined now and Noé got lost in it. There are leaks in the cracks, for example when Vanitas cries and tells Luna his mother died at childbirth why would he call to her. Initially, you can read this as he’s just missing what he never had. But what if Vanitas’ mother was present in his life 9 memory loops ago but because these memories get further from the truth the more it happens, Noé simply forgot that detail when making the memoirs at some point in time. So now, in the memory layer #52 Vanitas has no mother.

💜: /We will see what we “cannot see”/

💙: /We will know what we “don’t know”/

💙💜: /The final stop of this world that seems to be changing, seems only further ahead/

Noe’s line possibly goes into his Archiviste nature and how he experiences reading memories. It can as well build back into the dream/memory loop thing, he’s seeing things he can no longer “see.”

Vanitas’ line can be drawn to what Noé said during their fight.

Vanitas acts like he has the final word and has a full grasp of how this world/himself works. But he really doesn’t and Noé is living proof of that, proving him wrong on several occasions that there’s still hope, they can’t give up yet, he won’t leave him etc. The final stop of this world is changing, but it’s further ahead. This is a story, a preserved section of time from the past. We gotta ask ourselves... why would the last stop be changing? Again, Vanitas’ death is the final stop but it’s changing, perhaps from the countless iterations we’ve gone through Noé writes the memoirs in a way that delays the ending. So he could remain just a little longer…

💙💜: /Le formidable! Le formidable! Everything is fine. While forgetting, hiding, and repeating it/

💙: /This worthless/

💜: /wonderful/

💙💜: /world we are walking on/

💙: /I don’t know but even so/

💜: /If it can make you smile.../

After this, it ends the song by repeating the first chorus with the colliding-rolling down part so I’ll make this the cutting point. The “everything is fine” totally doesn’t stick out in a story where we know everything will not be fine. The forgetting and hiding goes back to my dream-memory theory, Noé is hiding from the truth in these stacks upon stacks of memories and is possibly forgetting things as they really happened as a result. We already know he isn’t the most reliable narrator. But Noé wants to see Vanitas’ smile.

If it can make you smile again, if it can replay your laughter, why would I ever leave this wonderful lie? In OP 1: “Your laughing was reflected by a daydream”.

I’ll conclude this by saying two things. If you want to get even deeper, you can interpret Vanitas in this song as the voice in the back of Noé’s head. Its just a dream, this world is actually worthless, and Noé is trying to drown out those thoughts. Because yeah they sing lines together but the only time they’re directly speaking to each other is when Vanitas scolds Noé and Noé shouts back, calling him loud. Finally, I could be wrong in all this. I am aware how crazy I may look and I'm so thankful if you read this far.

But yeah if this is anywhere near canon, mochijun must be the most unhinged, absolutely cracked author I’ve ever seen. We’re going into Pandora Hearts levels of intricacy here. I hope you enjoyed my insanity 👍🏼

[agentoffangirling]

I have a bone to pick with characters who cause problems then run off and use their backstories as an excuse for everything they do. HOWEVER, there is a difference between well-written ones and badly-written ones. Let's examine Grant Ward and Sylvie Laufeydottir (this is gonna be long, bear with me)

Ward, in case you're not familiar with Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., is a character who had a difficult upbringing. His parents adored his youngest brother and turned a blind eye to the abuse Ward faced under his older brother. He also was hurt by his parents, so safe to say he had a tragic backstory

Later on in his life, he was picked up by John Garrett, an undercover HYDRA agent. Garrett groomed Ward and manipulated him, and it wasn't long before Ward joined HYDRA as well

Now I am not defending Ward. He is an absolutely despicable character, he's literally a Nazi, he threw two characters into the ocean, became overally obsessed with one of the mcs when it was clear she didn't want him, and killed and kidnapped multiple people with little to no remorse. He also uses his backstory as an excuse for all this stuff, claiming he does it for "Skye", "Kara", "us". Grant Ward gets no sympathy from me

There's a notable moment in s2 where the S.H.I.E.L.D. team is forced to work with him again, and upon getting death stares from all of them, this conversation takes place:

Ward: "And I could stand here and explain again how my parents and brother left me vulnerable..."

May: "We all had our traumas, Ward. Didn't turn any of us into psychopaths."

...

Ward: "I mean, for a while there, we were a good team. Weren't we?"

Skye: "I'm still happy I shot you.

Simmons: "Yeah, me too."

Fitz: "Should've aimed for the face."

And the writers don't ever try to make it so Ward is justified in doing these things. Not just his actions, but also the claim that his backstory excuses it, because as you can see above, other characters point out that they had all been through their fair share of troubles, and they didn't turn out like him. They don't justify the shit they did because their life was hard. The writers do make it so that a watcher can sympathize with Ward, and they also make it very clear he is not correct in doing these things

He's also a very complex person in general. He has so many traits, some of them downright conflicting, but that's who he is. Tancheroen and the others show that very well, and almost everything he does is in-character. Ward is a very well-written bad character

Now we turn to Sylvie. Sylvie also had a difficult upbringing, but I'm not gonna be the one to compare whether or not hers was worse than Ward's. However, where we reach our first road block is that Sylvie has much less character traits than Ward. She's a lot simpler than him in terms of writing, but the creators act as though she's complex and conflicted when she's really not. That doesn't necessarily mean that she's a worse character. There's a lot the writers could do to improve on her or write her well. But they don't even try

Sylvie is not given anything new to do in season 2. Zilch. Nada. A big old goose egg. She could've been dealing with her conflicting feelings on killing He Who Remains, she could've picked up a new hobby or given a personal stake in all this Loom stuff. The writers could've written her so that she didn't know what she wanted since getting rid of HWO was her only task, and now that he's gone, she could go do what actually makes her happy. They had so many opportunities to expand upon her, but nope. She's just given a McDonald's uniform and ends up being the exact same person she was at the beginning of season 1. That's not growth. That's not anything

But hey, if they're not going to do anything with her, maybe they could try for a different angle in how others perceive her. Instead of always being seen as right, she could be seen as wrong in some instances. Fine, make her bitchy, but make it so that the characters call her out on it. Have the creator perception frame her as selfish and and rude. For example, instead of trying to justify her yelling at Mobius in episode 4, have Loki fire back. Say she held them up and only cares about herself in that fight. Say that for once, she should listen to others. Say that everyone has problems, yet they don't do her destructive actions and claim they're right. They didn't need to do the Grant Ward route on everything, but having a couple times where she is framed as him in AoS wouldn't be that bad

Sylvie is a badly-written bad character. Her lack of traits and staticness of arc make her come short compared to Ward, and the continued stubbornness of the creative team to always frame her as justified and right adds to this. I am not against tragic backstories, I am not against characters being bitchy, but I will always have a problem if they use said backstory as an excuse for everything they do

And if they do, then at least have the courtesy to write them well and for other characters to call them out

[forasecondtherewedwon]

but for the grace of gods

Fandom: Percy Jackson and the Olympians Pairing: Sally/Poseidon Rating: G Word Count: 829

Summary: At the border between life and death, Poseidon holds Sally in the River Styx.

She isn’t sure whether she’s falling asleep or waking up, but it feels like a dream. Her unconscious mind is a revolving door. It’s impossible to say how long it’s been, only that she thinks her eyes are closed. Once the thought enters her head—my eyes are closed—she starts to wonder if it’s true, starts trying to sense what her eyelids are doing, starts waking up or falling asleep.

Her eyes open. It’s dark (well, it was night… somewhere). She’s soaked (it was raining… wherever that was…). She’s alone (she told someone to run…). Until she’s not.

He doesn’t speak, but she can feel him and has the same amount of trust in that feeling as she has in her eyes gauging the dark, her skin the wet, her heart the solitude. The water flows around her, soft like her name, Sally. Abruptly, she has a sense of being supported from below, as if kept afloat on someone else’s body. The water becomes arms to encircle hers, fingers to slip between hers as invisible hands take hold. Hold fast.

“Percy!”

Is the sound of her own voice real?

“Sally,” Poseidon soothes, “you are beyond him. He is beyond you.”

The first might be true; she gasps, kicking her legs as they come to life, instinctively reacting to the Minotaur who’s no longer crushing her. She isn’t where she was. There’s no river in the clearing by the camp’s border. Sally flails and begins to absorb details of the landscape past the river that simultaneously rushes and keeps her still. Black rock—grim, volcanic. Cliff faces that soar out of site. And the people. The only hopeful thing about them is that none are Percy. They can’t be. Not him; not here.

Because she has a feeling she knows where here is, this place Poseidon says puts her and Percy beyond each other. She doesn’t believe that’s true. Yes, there are things only the gods understand, but her relationship to her son is wholly her domain.

Her tears merge into the flow. She can hear Percy praying to her.

I hope you can hear me.

Sweetheart, I can.

She knows it’s a one-way call, that Percy won’t get any sign that she’s listening. She pictures him at camp. She can’t make the river rise up the shore or send raindrops that make thick music in the woods or heat the water when he washes his hands for dinner (at least 20 seconds, Percy, please). When she was there, she would’ve done anything for him, and she can only trust that he’s remembering that now that she’s here. It’s from here, away from the mortal world, that her son’s father used to respond to her own offerings and prayers. She recalls the day, the restaurant, the counter she was sitting at when he stepped into her world and didn’t speak to Percy. Percy who was struggling, Percy who felt so unwanted that day. She and Poseidon have existed, have loved, in opposite ways.

I’m gonna make him see me, her son is swearing to her. I’m gonna make him see us both.

And she wishes it were simpler, that she could tell him how the father who missed every birthday is also the lover who cradles her in the River Styx. There is so much ahead of Percy that she can’t imagine. Herself, for example; she can’t imagine whether or not she’s there, ahead of him, not beyond him like Poseidon claims.

“I’m worried,” she says.

She says, “I’m tired.”

Rocking in the current, she says, “I won’t stay here, will I?”

“No,” Poseidon confirms. “You’ll pass into Hades’ realm. Right now, you’re suspended at the border between life and death.”

“How…?”

“Fortunately, that border is water. You aren’t his yet.”

Not Hades’, not Percy’s. Between life and death, sleep and consciousness. Since she’s neither trailing after Charon nor waiting in line for Club Underworld, it’s Sally’s understanding that the Minotaur didn’t succeed. She’s just taking death for a test-drive. She’d love to steer this one back to the dealership and say, No thanks, lob the keys back across the salesman’s desk.

“Percy’s going to come,” she says on instinct.

But she’s afraid for him, and the water of the Styx runs cold.

“Who wouldn’t come for you?” Poseidon asks tenderly, because he did, he found her here in the deepest, darkest water.

Despite her fear, his touch is a cool cloth to her forehead, suddenly fevered. Her entire body is warming in defiance of the frigid river. It doesn’t feel forced when her knee bends and her arm reaches out, her body reshaping itself to the last posture it held in life. She is slowly remade in gold. Her jacket tugs towards the riverbed, her hair pulls at her scalp, and Poseidon stays with her. Water goes from slicking her skin to shining her gilded hands. My eyes are open, she thinks, her vision a gleam against the dark.

[eggsandmasks]

Ok so...

Good day, again CC fandom.

I've been analyzing my blorbo(Diego)'s design for quite some time, and I've begun to notice something. This may be a bit of a stretch, but hear me out...

I've learned through a friend, some research, and experience that art has direction. This basically means the way the art directs your eyes to look at certain things. This can be done through stuff like composition, color, perspective, and more.

Turns out it can also be done with character design. It's a little different, since this is character and not an entire illustration, but it's still possible. The most common ways I've seen direction in character design are through color, and through special accessories, clothing, or parts of their body (a prosthetic arm, or a giant gem that sits in the center of their body for instance).

More specifically, I want to talk about how color is used to direct a viewer's eyes, and how Diego del Lobo utilizes it.

First of all, before I go into detail, I just love how his design can both blend into and stick out from the various environments that we find him in. It really adds to his mysteriousness and it serves a practical purpose too since it allows him to sneak around in he dark without getting spotted.

Now onto the topic at hand!

The moment you see him, the first thing you're probably gonna look at is his face. Now, I'd be lying if I said he looked like your everyday gentleman. In fact, he's way more than that, if the game he's from is anything go by.

But let's say you don't see his face right away. Maybe you look at his chest or the center of his sprite. You might just be looking in between his grey vest and white shirt but pretty soon, you'll see a little of his neck above his shirt and that immediately leads you to uncovering the rest of him. What if you're not looking at him directly, but rather to his side or above his hat?

This is where background colors come into play. I've already stated that his design can make him both blend in and stand out with what he's standing against, but I want to focus on the former idea. If you're looking at him in the dark, his black jacket and hat blend in pretty well with the surrounding darkness. Then, your eyes begin to draw onto his grey vest, as it stands out slightly more. Afterwards, you gravitate towards his white shirt, because it stands out the most in his attire, before finally landing on his face.

But what if he's standing against a bright background? Again, he immediately draws the viewer's attention because of how his attire has little to no color compared to the environment besides black and white.

You know what else is fascinating? How his design, particularly his face, appears to "trap" the viewer. To make things a little simpler, the fact that his face is the only part of his design that has color makes it stand out, but once you've seen it, it takes a while for you to leave it. I'll admit, while his attractiveness is a key part to this, I think it's also because of the colors around it.

He has tan skin, and shoulder-length brown hair that frames his face in an almost mesmerizing manner. When you zoom out and try to look at he rest of his design, you'll just be surrounded by borders of black, white and gray in the form of his clothes. This works especially well if you're looking at him on the home/loading screen.

Right away, he is made distinct from the rest of the cast. Other than his seductive look at he camera and his position on the far left, what makes him different from the others is his color palette, consisting of blacks, whites and grays everywhere but his skin and face. Because of this, it draws your attention to the areas with more color and saturation, and you'll soon come to find that you're slowly being moved towards his face, and you can't resist he pull. Once you're locked on his face, it takes a while to leave.

If you try to move anywhere else, like say, above his head, you'll still be able to see his eyes. The sides of his head? The slight contrast between his skin and hair creates border, so you go back. Below his chin? The white shirt will keep you from going further down.

In conclusion, Diego's design is based on getting the player to look at him immediately, especially his face. His tan skin contrasts with the black-and-white palette of his clothes, so once you see him, you gravitate towards his face. Additionally, his face is also surrounded by contrasting colors, so you're basically locked on him.

------

To all who have bravely continued reading until this point, thank you. This was just a thought/theory of mine I wanted to ramble about once I noticed it.

Or I might just be overanalyzing this a bit too much...

Anyways, what are your thoughts? Any comments and theories would be greatly appreciated!

[heybiji]

hi!!! i just wanted to say i really love all of your MASKS stuff. i'm something of a newbie when it comes to the TTRPG community, but MASKS seems to be not very well-known and i think that's a real shame. i'm a huge fan of old-school superhero-adjacent stuff, especially the silver- and bronze-age ones!

by the way, i was wondering if you'd be willing to share some tips for a first-time GM? you don't have to if you'd rather not! i just figured i'd try asking since i was planning on GMing a MASKS campaign for some of my friends later, but despite my decade's worth of roleplaying experience i've never been in a TTRPG campaign nor a GM (or similar) role before

Thank you so much!! I was just lamenting about how I felt bad for the MASKS tag because it is now flooded with all my npc nonsense hahah so this is really nice to hear.

It's awesome you're planning on running a MASKS game for your friends!! There is an indispensable post on twitter I saw that has a LOT of great tips for running MASKS that I recommend checking out. But for my own personal tips that are just me things, here's what I got. Sorry it's gonna be extremely long-winded, it may take a few months to read through it.

(Note: I am also hugely into RP and probably put more into it than what is necessary, especially with MASKS which is meant to be able to be played out of the box. It was definitely not played out of the box in our case because I require a lot out of myself and everyone else to feel good about running something. if anyone else wants to continue seeing me as a normal human being please don't click the Keep Reading)

Since you're running it, make the world interesting to you. If the world runs around themes you're personally interested in then you'll have a much easier time coming up with answers on the fly. For me, themes I'm interested in that lend themselves well to a superhero world: money, power, family, celebrity, media, the 24 hour news cycle and the desensitization of violence. Because I'm interested in this stuff anyway, wrapping a world around them makes it much simpler for me to figure out how the world ticks and thus how the characters fit into it and how the world reacts to them, and I am DESPERATE to find out how the characters react to all the questions and expectations the world is imposing upon them.

Make sure your players have a good grasp of the tone of story so they can make characters that gel well within it. For me the tone is a lil more adult because I'm not personally into younger morality tale stories in tone, it's pretty grounded, and I think comedy and tragedy work hand in hand so I lean into them.

Talk. A lot. Talk about the characters, talk about the world. MASKS is fun because it's a LOT of talking and figuring out the narrative together. It's not a lot of crunchy mechanics, it's all around seeing how the characters react to the world narratively, all hurt and comfort and emotions which (for me) requires people to have a good grasp on their characters and the world. I like to give my players "homework" where I ask them a question involving their characters in some way like "what hero did your character look up to as a child?" so they get to come up with past heroes, or "How does your character feel about _____?" etc etc. The only fans are gonna be your table and fans love to talk so be the biggest fans of the PCs!!

Figure out your framing. I know in MASKS they suggest framing it like a comic book, and basically talking about the frames on screen. For me, because I'm more into movies and tv than comics, I frame it like that. So I have an active "camera" in play during sessions and will ask things like "would anyone like to grab the camera?" to encourage the players to put the character into a scene or "what does the audience see as the camera focuses in on your character in this emotional moment?" There is a LOT of playing up to the camera and framing the sessions as episodes of a show, so it's like, okay, you have several options but what is going to be interesting for the audience to see? I find this encourages the players to have their characters take bigger swings and feel comfortable letting us into how their character is feeling because it all looks GREAT on camera. The camera loves it. The PCs are the story after all.

Because I frame it a show, I also like to play individual ending songs over the "credits" at the end of each episode. So I asked my players to make playlists for their characters so if I feel an episode had a lot of emotional focus on one character in particular, I can play one of their songs at the end of the episode! I also made a general MASKS playlist with a bunch of songs from the era we set it in (2004) to pull from. It's a fun little addition that I really enjoy and that I hope makes it all feel more special.

The Dino Donut Effect: create landmarks in your world. (OK THIS IS GONNA BE LONG BUT WORK WITH ME HERE) They don't have to be locations, more solid landmarks of the story that the characters can refer back to and lean on to make the world feel more "real." I call it the Dino Donut Effect because in our world the thing that made everything click into place was talking out the backstory of one of the PC's figuring out they had the power negation ability. We were talking one night trying to figure it out; we wanted the character to fall out of a building and be caught by a flying superhero and accidentally turn off their powers, so they toss the kid to another flying supe whose powers also get turned off. But we were like... holy shit what is the height of a building needed that can handle this much action in the air without them hitting the ground in 3 seconds. So after a long night of talking about terminal velocity and looking at Splat Calculators we figured out the height of the building, and we needed them to crash into something that wouldn't fuckin kill them. The first suggestion was a truck full of bananas. Nah. We landed on a giant balloon that could take the impact. And the balloon became a giant T-Rex holding a donut that was the mascot of the city's beloved decades old donut shop Dino Donut. And so we decided that one of the two flying supes grabbed onto the kid and the other and flew into the giant balloon to try and keep them all alive, which destroyed the balloon, which was a city institution, and there was a crowd of children there that day that saw their friend Dino Donut die. Killed by a superhero. The balloon deflated loudly so it sounded like Dino Donut was screaming in agony. All the kids were traumatized (screaming crying throwing up), the city was furious because everyone loved Dino Donut, it was constantly in the news cycle, and it ruined the career of the supe that "killed Dino Donut." AND THEN THEY REPLACED THE DINO DONUT BALLOON WITH A LAME "UPDATED DESIGN" DINO DONUT STATUE which everyone hates and people consider to be a memorial to the old Dino Donut. ANYWAY, the Dino Donut effect is that now all the PCs have one single incident to refer back to that they all have feelings about. A couple of them were there that day and heard Dino Donut scream, one is now the protege of the disgraced superhero that killed Dino Donut so she feels uncomfortable talking about it, there's the kid that was saved that day but was sworn to secrecy by the supe so no one would find out about his power negation ability, and then there's the kid that wasn't there because she's an alien that just arrived to earth and now the kids have to explain the incident to her with all their varying opinions. Now the PCs' meeting spot is at a Dino Donut. Having this one solid incident that is both funny and kind of goes into the themes of the world has been an absolute treat. Creating "landmarks" like that in the world has done so much and now I'm like okay I'm gonna try to do this moving forward with any other thing I run.

anyway these are my extremely specific to me tips. my RP standards are kind of high which makes me a bit of a terror but also when the flowers bloom from it it feels GREAT. i'm not sure if this will help but hopefully there is something there that can be useful!

MASKS is fun and simple once you get the hang of it, though, so I'm sure whatever you do you and your players will have a lot of fun! especially if you're someone who is into RP which is the background I'm coming from too; MASKS is extremely narrative! i'll be looking in the tag for your game hehe

(The Day Dino Donut Died art by JD)

[vivisols]

digital circus 👀👀 any theories?

I HAVE SO MANY...

specifically about this shot... this shot has a lot to me!

we get this shot of the spinning objects during the "day after day" part of the intro

theres a teapot, old record player/gramophone/whatEVER its called, flower pot (which we see start clipping through the stage), an eye, a pure white sphere and a pyramid!

maybe im reaching but i think these items represent each of the cast.. how so you may ask? WELL! (under the cut)

the eye is clearly caines since hes the ONLY guy in the show to have green eyes. also he has hundreds of all seeing eyes (as he himself said) so thats obvious. and yeah the other objects representing the other cast seems a little far fetched but it makes sense to MEE….

as for the teapot... we see those EXACT teapots during the trip both to and back from the funny dev room. now tech wise the teapot actually has a bit of history LMAO.. the teapot model is known as the utah teapot and is one of the first ever models created using bezier curves! it was made in 1975 and is typically considered a test model for rendering/testing how lighting reacts to complex curved models the only character we EVER see interact with the teapots/get tied to the teapots is pomni. so i think its safe to say the utah teapot is representing pomni! ALSO. CAINES EYE IS INTENTLY FOCUSED ON IT. could be because she's causing a whole bunch of glitches in the system…

the gramophone is interesting especially to me. i mean its REALLY detailed. like that would be polygons GALORE. unlike the utah teapot. all the promo for the vinyl record they sell has caine using a normal record player and NOT a gramophone so… its not caines! now whose would it be? im gonna go out on a limb and say its kingers. IT MAKES SENSE TO ME OK. kinger has been in the circus the longest and the other items in the circle are a LOT simpler. like a LOT a lot. it makes me think that as time goes on the computers strength/power is deteriorating which is evident by all the glitches/collision issues in both the pilot/episode 2.

ALSO IN THE TEASER WE SAW FOR THE EPISODE WHERE KINGER HAS A SHOTGUN HE'S IN A DARK ROOM WITH DIM GREEN LIGHTING

WHICH WE ONLY SEE AGAIN FOR THE TAPE RECORDER THING

AND IT KIND OF HAS A CONNECTION WITH RETRO TECHNOLOGY??? man idk LMAO this is probably the most straw grasping ive ever done. like theyre probably not in the same episode if im being realistic….

the gramophone could also be gangles object bc gangle is like. comedy and tragedy mask. and something something theater music gramophone i DONT KNOW ☠️

the flower pot is probably ragathas. she has the most blue on her after all + shes pretty sweet. now thats a very surface level connection BUT WE HAVENT EXACTLY SEEN IT AGAIN YET so… nothing else i can add really…. im trying ok LOL

now the pyramid is obviously representing zooble. i mean. they have triangle head… and pyramid is triangle….. IN THEIR ROOM TEASER WITH THEIR PIN THEY LITERALLY HAVE ONE...

ALSO THE PYRAMID IS ONLY OTHER GREEN THING BESIDES LEAVES OF THE FLOWER POT AND CAINES EYE. AND ZOOBLE IS THE ONLY CHARACTER TO HAVE ANY SORT OF GREEN ON THEM. even if it's more cyan/teal…. listen i can hope 😭😭😭😭

now the white ball is ESPECIALLY INTERESTING TO ME. BECAUSE ITS SO NONDESCRIPT. it could be gangle OR jax or even kinger if i misattributed the gramophone…. personally i think its gangles because her masks are #fffff white like the ball is…

and what if i went feral and said this was fuel for the "one of them is an NPC" theory…. BC LIKE. WHOEVER THE WHITE SPHERE IS. WOULD BE A REAL PERSON. WHILE WHOEVER DOESNT HAVE AN OBJECT IS THE NPC. NOT TO MENTION THE LAST SUPPER IMAGERY AT THE END OF THE PILOT.

and yeah nothing here really represents jax that i can think of though maybe it will more obvious in later episodes... soooo YEAH shoutout to the "jax is an NPC" theorists.

honestly whats most likely is that everyone has an object except for pomni because she just got there LMAO 🤕 i mean caine doesnt acknowledge her arrival until AFTER she fucks up the intro….

not to mention that kaufmo had been abstracted presumably the WHOLE day and wasnt in the intro so maybe his object wasnt there because he wasnt there… yeah this whole shot probably means nothing and im just yapping about nothing xDDD

[torchmlp]

Quarry ask! Which of the counselors do you think can cook, and which do you think are so bad at it, they could burn water?

Oooh this is a fun ask!

The obvious one who can cook would be Nick since he worked in the kitchen all summer. And I think he'd be really good at it. Obviously his ingredient choices would be limited at camp, but I bet he has a spice rack at home with everything in it, including those spices that no one has ever heard of. Whenever the counselors get together (I fully believe they would have potluck style get togethers), everyone always devours whatever Nick brings. In other words, get that boy a Kiss The Cook apron.

Abi I think would have a basic understanding of cooking. She can make most meals and can follow recipes without issue. I don't think she'd be into any of the real fancy stuff, though, preferring to make simpler meals. She cooks in bulk and then has a lot of leftovers so she doesn't have to worry about cooking every day.

Emma also has basic cooking skills, but I think she'd be more willing to experiment with different things, like looking up recipes online to try if they sound interesting. And then maybe she records it for her followers.

I think for Jacob and Kaitlyn (childhood bffs my beloved) it'd be really funny if Jacob was the one who could cook out of the two of them. And like, he's surprisingly good at it, not Nick levels of good, but still really good. Maybe he had to learn how to make healthy meals for himself when he was in sports because nutrition is important (it's not gonna stop him from splurging on peanut butter butterpops, though). He can also bake really well.

Kaitlyn, if left to her own devices, would eat cheap ramen every day. Could she learn how to cook? Yes. Does she care to learn how to cook? No. I do think she'd know how to make some traditional Chinese meals, but doesn't really bother cooking most days.

I fully subscribe to @ghostradiodylan's headcannon that Dylan is a disaster cook due to his ADHD. He would get distracted and forget that he was heating something until he'd smell smoke and by then it's burnt to a crisp. He just doesn't have the attention span to focus on cooking, especially with recipes that require waiting for something to boil or heat up. Maybe he could do crockpot meals where you just throw the ingredients in, turn it on, and forget about it until the end of the day. But mostly I think he would stick with easy microwave meals (just throw it in the microwave and heat it for however long and then it's ready. No other prep work) as long as he could hear the timer go off when it was ready.

Ryan can definitely cook. He probably learned more out of necessity than anything since he had to help take care of his sister. Maybe he finds it relaxing. I could see him learning some skills from his grandmother for his cooking.

I don't remember who said it in the quarry brainrot discord (come join us!) but Laura is definitely a grill master and has a Grill Daddy apron. The girl can make a mean steak/burger/ribs. I bet she even has her own smoker.

Max straight up can't cook. He's a kitchen disaster. One time he wanted to surprise Laura with breakfast in bed and it ended in him spilling pancake batter everywhere, burning the eggs, undercooking the bacon, and nearly causing a kitchen fire when the toaster short-circuited (he was saved by Laura waking up to the sound of the fire alarm going off and using the extinguisher on the poor toaster. She still said it was one of the best breakfasts she had ever had). He can't cook, but boy can he bake. @itscomingupaces said that Max can make a mean cheesecake and that's 100% true.

Thank you for the ask! What's everyone else's headcannons?

[hornsketch]

hey there! ive finally made an art blog! im going to try post more just… stuff, as usually i reserve my art posts for either special occaisions or specifically public-oriented works, and it kinda bums me out to not just have a place to dump my art anymore, so here you go!

(more details and helpful info below!)

who are you?

in hopes of providing some relevant lenses to view my work through, ill give some personal details here. if these lenses dont suit your interpretation of the work, thats alright! view as you please, though i do still think these will always be important context in said viewings.

my name is zelda (she/her) and im a queer jewish 20something who struggles quite a bit with illness both physical and mental.

ive always been kind of enthralled by impressionism and what it really means to use suggestion and spirit as a stronger tool than portrayal and form.

i have a particular draw to fantasy and magical aesthetics, especially the world-building within.

i am a serial overthinker, and tend to see alot of meaning and symbolism in things that plainly do not have them.

while yes i am jewish, my relation to faith is complicated. if you see me type “god” im using it in a turn of phrase with no meaning. if you see me type out “g-d” i am being religious. yes i know thats not how its supposed to work. its meaningful to me.

what will you post?

as previously mentioned, here im trying to make a concerted effort to post a broader variety of things with a wide selection in quality and topic, so unfortunately here the only real uniting theme is going to have to be that i made it. still! to help navigate the space, listed below will be a list of tags i will try to keep to, all of which this post will also be tagged as, since i know tumblr search can be finicky.

#the self and the other

these will be about me, my friends and loved ones, or possibly both

#differing mediums

these pertain to other works or universes, as well as fan content

#harsh tones

this is gonna be the rough stuff. topics will be tagged as needed.

#jaunty doodles

funny business. shenanigans, even.

#lesssfw

listen this blog is for a wide breadth of content, so please if you do not want to, or otherwise should not be seeing mild to moderate nsfw content (i dont rlly plan on posting straight up porn here) block this tag.

wait— is there anywhere you do post more direct nsfw?

maybe, yeah. but before any of that i would like to set some ground rules. these are my spaces for me to share my work for others to see. if you arent a fan of what i post, ill make no attempts to dissuade you from that. your discomfort is your right. I would however request that you dont make your discomfort an issue i am epxected to remedy. ill have no harsh feelings if you arent a fan of my less safe for work content, or even anything it may tangentially relate to, and need to take the necessary steps to curate your experience in those regards. i will be far less than happy if people cant behave because i post content that is not to their personal tastes, within reason.

all of that being said, yes, if you are an adult fan of my other work, feel free to check out @shinyspadetiptail

do you take commissions?

yeah, usually. im not really at the point where i have to close and open them for availability reasons, so shoot me a dm and ill usually be able to give you a response pretty quick on.

price tends to vary by project, and i always set $20 per hour of canvas time as my baseline, but generally simpler stuff like limited detail icons and emojis run in the $20-$30 range, while fully detailed halfbodies tend to run in the $40-$50 range, and fully done fullbodies range more $70-$80. aside from that, backgrounds are a little too context dependent to put a full price estimate on and extra characters can and will cost extra.

usually whatll happen is after laying out the basic price range we’ll talk, and ill thumbnail until we have smth we can agree on, and once weve got an idea of what were going for ill give an estimate that ill try to stick close to, barring any major changes or complications. from then on ill try to send updates whenever i work, and then when im relatively close to finished ill ask for the payment either through paypal or cashapp, after which ill send on the finished piece and any expected variations. in some cases, this may be changed, and payment may be done half at the start, and half when relatively close to completion.

[wrennsly]

Hey! Sorry, I'm kind of a rando here, and I'm gonna be on anon. But about your ARG post. I think it would be in poor taste to try to solve the ARG using info exposed about an abusive relationship, but also there's nothing particularly morally wrong about it. The arg is really old at this point, and not many people in this community even care about Wilbur Soot's projects anymore. Some people will probably find your plan weird and wrong, others won't give a fuck. In the end, you can do what you want. However, a lot of real life actual people were hurt by his actions, particularly his ex-partners. And using information about those actions to solve his arg may be pushing it too far, and psychoanalyzing the creators is always taking it too far in this community. (yes, even psychoanalyzing the bad ones)

I think your goal here is very important. Do you just want to solve the arg (made by an asshole that has been ostracized by the community) or is there a greater purpose to doing this? How are planning on presenting the information on the arg if you do find something? What if you find something ugly, can you share it in a manner that is respectful of the victims? Will solving it continue to platform an abuser? You cannot treat this situation like it is a spectacle, or something to theorize about, or something to take advantage of.

To summarize: There is a lot to consider, and some lines you shouldn't cross. As long as you are careful and conscientious of the people affected, I think it would be fine. But just have awareness of your own motives for doing this, and how it could affect others.

-🥝

Hello!

Thank you for asking. I would first like to say that my intention is not simply to solve the arg, since that would be in poor taste seeing as we are dealing with actual people and traumatic circumstances. My actual goal is to figure out if by realizing the corrupt nature of the author/creator a story could have a different impact or could be simpler to solve. Simply put: does the way we see people affect the things they make even to a point where the author is subconsciously telling us things about themselves without meaning to.

I’ve been researching the psychology behind storytelling and media creation and I do believe this is a solid way to try out my hypothesis, however like you said I don’t wish to cause anyone emotional distress. I have reached out to Shelby along with the other victims asking for their explicit permission to continue this train of research and will not be sharing any more information on the topic unless the state that they are comfortable with me doing so

I also wish to know the communities opinions on this as I know these things can affect people on a mental level, especially since Wilbur’s popularity peaked during the coronavirus and probably helped people who were going through the pandemic.

I hope this makes my intentions a bit more clear and lets you know I am fully aware of the difficult ground I’m on. Thanks for asking

[deltastra]

Just gonna share my thoughts on Chaos island and Tails’ story in Sonic Frontiers!

This is from a casual fan’s perspective

SPOILERS FOR CHAOS ISLAND

Sonic slowly getting more and more corrupted was an interesting sight to see, especially since his idle animation changes too. It really feels like Sonic is getting weaker, and yet, it just makes him seem more strong because he’s fighting it just to rescue his friends. I love it.

Another thing I love is how Sage and Sonic’s relationship feels more…sarcastic? Like Sage asking Sonic “what will you do?” sounds less like an actual question and just her trying to mess with him. And when Sonic got away from Knight, all she basically says “Yea, obviously I knew.” Which was kind of funny!

Holy shit I genuinely felt sad for Tails when he asked this. Poor kid struggles with a lot of self-doubt. I love how Sonic tackles this. He defuses the severity of his conclusion with humour while at the same time, acknowledging his feelings and providing evidence to back up his claim that Tails is everything but a burden. I loved this

HAHAHAHAA IM SORRY I GET THAT THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE TAILS TRYING TO CONVINCE SONIC THAT HE REALLY IS USELESS…

But come on! This feels like they’re trying to throw shade at the previous games’ handling of his character…

Okay, hear me out…

I think this symbol represents “completion” in some way…it only appears when the Kocos complete the goal they had in life. Once they complete it, they can ascend and be at rest. They’re finally complete, spiritually at least. I don’t know, that’s just what I believe.

I’m sure the symbol will have some strong meaning later on in the game.

Here we go! All three friends have finally stated that they want to go off on their own! I don’t know why, but it means so much more to me when it’s Tails saying this. I guess it’s cause it’s nice to see him grow up and wanting to be more independent.

But what I loved more was Sonic’s response to this…

Unlike Amy and Knuckles, where he seems so supportive of them wanting to go off alone, he hesitated for a moment with Tails. And I love this! It shows that Sonic isn’t as perfect as he may seem. This is Tails, his little brother. The fox that has always been by his side. He knew this would happen eventually, but it’s still a shock to him. That short hesitation is something I adore.

But of course, he is 100% supportive and even admitted that Tails grew up faster than he expected…

I love Sage’s character. Seeing her determination waver bit by bit while also saying that things would’ve been much simpler if they were just enemies, it just feels like at the end of the day, Sage is just a child. She just wants love…

Also turning blue?? What does that mean? Is it just her turning “good” or am I over-simplifying this…

And finally…

THIS BOSS. MAN THIS WAS SO GOOD

THE MUSIC WAS SUCH A BANGER. I LOVE HOW IT SOUNDS LIKE INFINITE’S THEME BUT LESS EDGY AND MORE HOPEFUL AND MOTIVATIONAL.

AND WHEN SONIC GRABBED THE BLADE AND CUT THE TITAN IN HALF?? PEAK.

I did not like the shield riding part tho. The missiles hitting me from all angles was so confusing and tedious to do cuz I kept getting hit back

[joshthenesnerd]

How to make an adventuring region for your sandbox campaign in 2 hours or less

you don’t need a quest, you don’t need any lore, you don’t need NPCs, and you don’t need names. I’m going to show you my quick and dirty method for making a region for your players to explore.

STEP 1: THE BLANK CANVAS

The first thing you’re going to need is something to put your map onto. This could be as simple as a blank piece of paper, but in my game I like to have an easy way to keep track of the scale so I made this hex map template for a 24-mile-wide region. Why 24 miles? Because that’s how far you can go at a normal pace in 5e before you need a long rest. A single day’s travel. The template is also a massive hexagon because I have a zoomed-out world map of hexes where 1 hex is one day of travel so I can just tell my players “This region corresponds to here”. You don’t need this template, a sheet of paper or a blank page in an image editor works fine.

Here's the template I start with if you want to use it.

From here though, you need either multi-coloured pens/pencils/markers or you need a second layer in your image editor (I use paint.net it’s basically like a simpler Photoshop. If you’ve ever tried Photoshop you’ll be ok here)

You’ll need four colours to mark on your map. Just four. One for roads, one for settled places, one for landmarks, and one for adventuring/questing zones like ruins, monster lairs, bandit camps and dungeons. I’ll pick orange, yellow, purple and red. You can use whatever you like, but avoid green and blue for now.

After that, put dots down relatively randomly. If you don’t like where something is placed, don’t worry you can change it. As for the roads, you can put them on before all the dots, between dots, or after dots. Up to you. When making the roads, make sure there’s one way off the map by road and try to let the road meander a bit or branch off a little. The roads will help dictate stuff for step 2

Here is a sample of what I ended up making. You don’t need to worry about what these places are yet beyond what the colour of the dot represents. But, as you’re placing them down, you might not be able to stop yourself from thinking of what a few are.  You don’t have to think much about the structure of this, but a structure might come out of the chaos. And don’t be afraid of the big stretches of wilderness, or dense areas. In step 2, you will be able to make it make sense.

STEP 2: WILDERNESS

Next step, you’ll need some more colours to lay out. Now you’re gonna ask the “why” questions. “Why is that road shaped like that? What’s it going around?”, “why are these things clustered over here?”, “why are those two settlements so far from the rest?”

Forests, lakes, hills, swamps, water, and any other weirdness

If you’re thinking about the wider world at this stage, which you don’t have to, consider what major biome changes are nearby. Are we a few days away from deserts, mountains, or massive swamplands? Then this might be the place to show the transition to that. In my case, there are mountains to the northeast, so there’s gonna be clusterings of hills up there. And since there are mountains, I’m going to add a stream coming through that fills up a lake. And perhaps a stream out of it to feed other lakes as well.

This is where I got to. It’s messy as hell, and that’s ok. Your product is probably going to be messy too, perfectly fine. You know what your blobs and waves are, I know what mine are. Your players aren’t going to see this.  If you felt like you needed to change anything during this step of the process, that’s ok. Notice how I put a lake down and got rid of a road. That’s fine. How does that town get to the next? A ferry. Sure why not? It only matters when your players ask about it.

STEP 3: FINALISATION

Ok, now we clean this up and get to the physical details. You’ve made this world at random, but you basically got an idea of what some things could be. Even if it’s just a major town, a small village, a monster layer, or a spooky obelisk that does magic weirdness. You don’t need detailed ideas for what they could be.

redraw this as a map that’s something you’d be somewhat ok showing your players. or if you like what you've got you can name the towns and stop here. that's ok. if you want to keep going we'll need symbols for all your places. If you’re drawing things by hand or sticking with the image editor, you can image search for “fantasy map legend symbols” and draw stuff that looks like that. However, if you don’t want to draw a boatload of trees, carefully tracing black around the shape of the forest will do wonders. and, that's a great way to make the water pop as well. or....

If you don’t want to draw it by hand, I used Hexographer. I’ll include a link to the Hexographer file of my Hex template if you want to use it. Hexographer will also do a lot of the landscaping work for you with the random function. Hexographer is older, but for what we’re doing it’s perfectly fine. Hexographer is quick and easy to learn, but the trial-and-error process can be a little annoying. With Hexographer there are biome hexes and icons for places, you can put down text and roads. And you can save your hex map as a PNG.

If you want something more modern, the creators of Hexographer have made Worldographer, but I haven’t tried it just yet.

If you’re not the best at figuring out names for places, go to your favourite map software (Google Maps, Apple Maps, Open Streetmap) and zoom in to see the names of small cities and towns from the part of the world that inspired your setting.  You can use them as inspiration, or you can steal them outright, maybe avoid major city names like “Minneapolis” or “Dublin” but nobody is going to be annoyed if they recognise smaller cities like “Lansing” or “Exeter”.

But from here, you should have your region. Now it’s up to you to fill in with quests and lore over time. Session 1 is usually a bit railroady, so for the first week you really only need one quest and a vague concept of a town.

sometime soon I'll talk about sandboxing and quest-hooks.

thanks for getting this far if you did. Have a sweet roll:

[assortedbirds]

08/01/24: Log 1- Static Pulse

To try and motivate myself, and also because I love archiving things, I am gonna experiment with writing diaries/logs for projects in order to update and reflect on my progress. Let's see how long I keep up with this!

While flitting between VN projects and other OCs for years I am finally in a place where I think I can feasibly start putting together Morgan and Wren's story. It's been a long journey with them so far, having first conceptualised them/crafted the story outline in 2017, but I can finally see myself putting the entire thing together. My original plan was to "warm up" so to speak by finishing/publishing another, shorter, work, Voice of A Living Fate. However: VN software is intimidating so I have been sitting on the completed script for Fate since the end of 2022 (whoops...). Truly, my brain's tendency to short circuit is my arch-nemisis.

However, I am nothing if not determined and I was looking into Ren'py, VN Maker and other such software to try and get started on learning the ins and outs of it, and out of left field my brain fell on Twine. It did not think of Twine as a potential software in which to make Fate, as it definitely would not suit the vision I have for that game, but I came to the realisation that the specific layout of text and visuals Twine is capable of would perfectly suit Wren and Morgan's story. And because of how approachable Twine is (so far, I am, fully anticipating that I will get caught up on trying to do something specific later) the story finally felt achievable to create.

I would have to adjust my process for this one, however. Instead of writing the entire script in my OC book (I vastly prefer handwriting my notes) then transferring that script to Google Docs, as I had with Fate and smaller personal projects like my twst OCs, I think that the best way to go will be to just use the assorted scene notes I have written over the past 7 years and write everything directly intro Twine. I just need to think about what device I want to start developing the game on, as I would ideally like to be able to work on it on my laptop, however I am far more productive when I work away from home and the inconveniences of my ipad might be outweighed by its portability...

As any rate, the first step, I quickly realised, was to simplify my artyle because if I use my regular style for this I will never get it done. I need to cut more corners!! I need to make it simpler!!!! While I am still agonising over Morgan's eye shape, I have more or less settled on this approach (having simple lines and minimal, flat, foreground and background colours):

(why does simplified Morgan look like he's smizing far more??? Argh!!!)

After that, upon opening a blank Twine Canvas, I came to the next stopping point...after seven years I still did not have a name for this story. So, on one of my "going to a café to force myself to be productive" outings, I sat down and spent a few hours agonising over names. My first idea (after looking at some "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep" quotes, not because I reference that story in any way in their story but because I am a Literature Nerd who loves cheeky references) was for the title to go against the thesis of the work somewhat. I enjoyed the idea of androids supposedly living "paltry lives" and the story being about proving that wrong. This idea could apply to Wren somewhat as well, so I started experimenting with phrases and soon realised that static is the perfect word to use in the title.

(If you notice the difference in pen, it it because mine had ran out and the café staff were kind enough to lend me another one...thankyou staff.)

Once I had that sorted, now came the arduous task of narrowing down what specific combination of words I wanted to use.....this is where I start to become unhinged over the span of a few days and 24 titles:

After discussing this with one of the two people who know the full details of this story (love you Evie, thankyou as always💖), we settled on Static Pulse as the title!

Now that this is decided, my goal is to start working on the early story CGs and chip away at the first draft of the game 💪 I will update with more information later...probably.

-Billie

[littleblueteacup]

So, I have an opinion...

Please note: this opinion was brought to light after a comparison of two frames of the most recent Wayne Family Adventures (episode 22) and a long conversation with my sister about Dick Grayson’s opinions regarding the Discowing costume. There will be spoilers ahead, you have been warned.

The actual conversation that I had with my sister was based around the frame where Dick wears the Discowing suit, and the frames where we see Jason wearing the Discowing suit, and the frankly astonishing differences we see between the two. 

Now, my arguments were based on stuff I will put in a different post, and also the fact that Dick, when wearing the suit, isn’t wearing one of his siblings’ costumes; he’s wearing his own. He’s wearing something he wore at a time when he didn’t have as much baggage on his shoulders and shit was far simpler, and it’s likely that when he wears the suit, that’s what he remembers. Jason, however? He’s wearing a suit that was his older brother’s, something he hasn’t dealt with since being Robin and depending on the previous experiences of the characters, Jason may not have many positive memories regarding that particular Nightwing suit, Dick may have been fighting with Bruce, or avoiding the manor completely when the Discowing suit was a common occurrence.

That all, of course, affects their confidence. I won’t say that confidence makes or breaks an outfit, but it helps. For example, most of the Robins, when taking up the mantle, changed something about the suit, to make it more comfortable for them. Tim added pants (and later changed the colour scheme), Stephanie made it more forgiving to the female form, Damian muted the colours and added a hood to the cape, and Duke (yes he’s on here and counts) took what he could of the Robin uniform and made it work for his purposes. You see these examples throughout timelines and scattered through various members of the DCU and it’s important to acknowledge the why.  For the characters, it’s to separate them from people who they look up to, who set impossible standards for them and to prevent them from falling into weeping puddles of “I’ll never be like them!”. For writers and readers, it’s to limit confusion, especially in cases where mentors have a habit of picking up kids with the same general outline (see: the male Robins (sans Duke)).  the side effect of this, is that a lot of the esteem the characters build up is based on their own identity, Tim would never comfortable in the Red Hood outfit, Dick wouldn’t be well-suited to a Batgirl costume, Stephanie wouldn’t take up a Signal costume, because all of them can see the good that the others do as themselves (mostly) and if they take up that role, it changes because they are different.

In this instance? The Discowing suit is put up as a punishment, and it’s mandated, so Jason can’t actually get out of it. Of course it’s gonna be confidence draining for him, never mind the fact that he’s got his other siblings ragging on him. But also? Jason probably isn’t the biggest fan of exposing his chest, given some of the scars that feature in various timelines (Joker-made HAHAHA’s, autopsy scars, training with the LoA, take you’re pick) all of which could be triggers for flashbacks to the traumas that caused them, which could be extremely damning in a fight. 

The other thing is, Jason and Dick have two different body types (Dick’s relatively slender, while Jason is built like a tank), so unless the suit Jason ends up with is a) extremely stretchy (and even then...), or b) a different suit entirely (in which case... what the hell, how does Bruce not know about this yet, that’s too much money, what the fuck?!) Jason’s gonna have fabric pulled relatively tight around pretty much his entire body, so you can imagine how uncomfortable that would be. And it’s not gonna look good either, so...

The point that I’m trying to make, is that the perspective regarding the Discowing suit changes depending on who’s talking about it. Dick doesn’t see it as a punishment, because it’s his, and it’s something that he remembers fondly. 

The rest of the family don’t have that perspective or the memories to look back on, so their perspective is something closer to “this suit was a horrible fashion choice and needs to be burnt- wait, please don’t make me wear it! oH gOd”

Again, the utter disgust on Jason’s face here, which is pure gold, honestly.

And Bab’s comment to Dick’s protests of his suit being a punishment.

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Meeting and Dating Casper McFadden

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

- Moving into a new home was never easy. Oftentimes, it meant packing up everything you owned, leaving a bunch of good memories behind, and traveling across the country to a new town where you’d have to make all new friends and renovate old fixtures.

- But there was something about your new house that made it both easier and harder to live in: the fact that it was haunted.

- Obviously your family didn’t find out about the ghosts until after they’d signed the papers and even if they were warned about it, they probably wouldn’t have believed the realtor, but none of that mattered now. Now you were stuck in a old house with a bunch of spirits, stuck until your parents save up enough money to move again.

- So what made the manor easier to live in, you may ask. Well, the fact that it came with a friend….

- You and Casper meet the day you move into the Whipstaff Manor. You’re wandering around, exploring the home and trying to figure out which room you want to live in, unaware that there’s a specter following you.

- The minute Casper sees you, he’s head over tail. You make his undead little heart race and have him second guessing his every action. Which is the main reason it makes him a while to formally introduce himself, he’s too scared that he’ll ruin his first impression.

- Sadly for him, his first impression still doesn’t go over well, regardless of how much he practiced.

- In his defense, it wasn’t anything that he did, it was more the fact that you were suddenly face to face with a phantom. Anyone would have freaked out in response to that, and they would have freaked out to any ghost as well; no matter how friendly.

- So, like the rational young woman that you are, you scream and take off like a rocket, dashing out of the room and down the hall to find a more secure and safe looking room to hide in until your parents get back from the store.

- He follows behind, attempting to calm you down and feeling downright awful for scaring you. Once you’ve locked yourself away into a broom closet, he gives you a minute to breathe before he calls out to you, telling you that he’s sorry and trying to coax you out so that you can talk.

- It takes you another minute to be convinced and to trust him when he says he isn’t gonna hurt you, but eventually, you do brace yourself and open the door.

- Once you do, you find that he really isn’t as scary as you’d originally though he was. In fact, he was actually sort of cute; in a cartoony sort of way, and he’s friendly to boot; so you wind up feeling a bit silly for being so frightened of him. And after you begin to think like that, the two of you begin to develop a close friendship.

- While his uncles might be incredibly obnoxious and annoying, you can’t deny that you enjoy having the ghostly presences in your home; especially when school roles around and you find yourself feeling like an alien with no one to turn to. You might not have any living friends in your town but you at least have a few see through ones at home that ensure you’re not completely alone.

- But, compared to your primarily platonic feelings, Caspers feelings for you were a lot more complicated. He valued your friendship and enjoyed having you as a pal, but he also had more romantic feelings towards you. In simpler terms: he’d had a massive crush on you from the moment you walked in.

- And though he’d have loved to confess his feelings and see if you felt the same, he knew that it was practically impossible for the two of you to be together; at least until you’d died …or until he was alive again!

- The minute he remembers the Lazurus he immediately erupts into a fit of excitement and joy. If you could get it to work, he could be alive again and the two of you could be together for the rest of your lives, either as friends or as something more, he honestly didn’t care which; though he hoped it was the second one.

- So he tells you about the invention and the two of you get to work. You take the wild trip down to his fathers lab, search around until you find what you’re looking for, load the contraption up with it’s necessary elixir, and pull the levers with bated breath.

- You don’t know what you’d expected to walk out of the machine but it certainly wasn’t this. Perfectly done blond hair, shining blue eyes, and a face that made you suddenly flustered to be in your best friends presence. He looked like a Disney prince and you were captivated.

“How do I look?” He asked nervously.

“Perfect,” you responded a little too quickly. “I mean, human, normal …living.”

- His face broke out into a smile and he threw his arms around you, pulling you into a tight hug. The action caught you off guard and made your heart race but you didn’t mind in the slightest.

- Once you’d finished hugging, he pulled away slowly and you found yourselves locking eyes. His gaze flickered to your lips and before you knew it, the two of you were leaning forward and sharing a kiss.

- His uncles may or may not have interrupted you but the “damage” was already done. You were just as hooked on him as he was on you and neither of you could be happier.

- Casper loves pda. He loves being able to actually touch you and be out in public and show the whole town that the two of you are together; even though half of them are confused as to who he is. 

- He touches you and holds you close whenever he can. He’s waited to do it since the moment he met you and now that you’re together; and he isn’t ice cold and only semi-solid, he enjoys every little ounce of affection he can provide and obtain.

- Handholding.

- Cheek kisses. 

- Long, soft kisses. They’re sort of a contrast to his usual hyper behavior, which is why, if you ever need him to calm him down and focus, all you have to do is ask for a kiss or make it obvious that that’s what you’re going to do. He skids to a stop and happily complies as he gives you an adorable little smile.

- Pet names aren’t really his thing but he does call you by fun nicknames that he’s come up with; usually a shorter or longer version of your name.

- Cuddling is a must with Casper. He absolutely loves it, no matter how the two of you do it. Sometimes you’ll lay on his chest, other times you’ll spoon, and other times you’ll face each other on the bed and talk until one of you dozes off.

- Speaking of: he definitely watches you sleep every now and again, which sounds far more creepy than it actually is. Like, you’ll be talking late at night and you’ll fall asleep and he’ll just look at your peaceful face for a while.

- If we’re going with the assumption that Casper maintains some of the aspects of being a ghost, I think it’s safe to say that he’s occasionally at least a little cooler than a normal human, which makes him the perfect companion for hot days.

- Being carried and flown around.

- Sometimes; especially prior to him being in the Lazurus, he forgets that you’re not a ghost and gets you into some uncomfortable situations. And after he turns human again, he definitely has to get used to not being able to go through walls and have things go through him when they’re thrown or fall.

- Testing out exactly what he’s still capable of doing and if there’s any limits to his new life. Is he perfectly normal? Does he have ghostly powers? Do the effects occasionally wear off during certain times or seasons? It’s all stuff you have to figure out.

- For a while after he’s brought back to life, he spends all day experiencing everything he missed when he was still alive. All the smells, sights, and touches; he runs around like Jack Skellington while you sit back and watch with a smile.

- Going to the mall. It’s one of his favorite places to visit, he just loves the entire atmosphere of the place; especially since he wasn’t really able to go and enjoy everything about it before he turned human again.

- Tv dates.

- Playing different games with each other. Board games, pirates, video games, you name it, he’ll do it.

- Sitting on top of the lighthouse with him.

- Enjoying the view from outside of the manor. You have the perfect view of the ocean from your garden so the two of you can always throw a blanket down and stare out at the sea together.

- Just goofing off with each other. Running around the house together, sliding down the stairwell, having him push you in a chair down the halls, etc. You’ve got a huge house to mess around in, why not take advantage of it?

- Dancing together. He told you he was a good dancer.

- Late night conversations. You can always talk to him about anything you want or need to.

- Catching him watching you a lot. He always has such a loving gaze when he’s looking at you, just seeing his face when he’s watching you do something or speak is reassurance that he really cares about you.

- Always having a warm and excited greeting when you return home from school. He also probably occasionally goes with you or at least walks you there or visits during lunch.

- He loves making surprises for you. Throwing you little parties or coming up with different ways to make you smile or cheer you up after school or whenever he can see that you’re feeling down is one of his favorite hobbies.

- He wants to be with you like 25/7 so don’t be surprised if he’s constantly bothering you with his presence. It’s a good thing you love him because if you didn’t he’d become very annoying, very quickly.

- Him just appearing at random is commonplace so your parents and you definitely have to take some time to get used to it. I mean he lives in your house and now that he’s human again, it’s definitely a bit easier than when he was a ghost, but still.

- Getting chairs pulled out and doors opened for you. He likes being a gentleman.

- Him cooking for you. He definitely tries to impress you with his skills and all the inventions he uses; and he just likes doing something nice like that for you.

- Discovering all his dads inventions and letting him tell you about them. It’s really quite fascinating to see how they all work and how excited he gets while showing you how to use them.

- I have a feeling that he doesn’t like winter; for obvious reasons, and whenever it comes around, all he wants to do is stay inside with you and do indoor activities. If you were to want to go out, it’d take you a while to persuade him and even if you did; or were only going out by yourself, he’d spend forever bundling you up and making up a bunch of rules to keep you safe.

- Probably dealing with his ghostly self every now and again. I have a feeling that the Lazurus machines effects occasionally wear off for a little while from time to time so while he’s alive most of the time, you do have moments of spooky transparency as well.

- Pranking each other and other people. He might be a sweetheart but he also has a bit of a mischievous streak.

- Him always wanting to show you whatever cool thing he sees, does, finds, or hears about. Just being able to share things with you makes him happy.

- Listening to his stories from when he was alive or the decades he wasn’t.

- Fixing up his room for him and hanging out up there with all his toys.

- Being gifted some of his mothers things. Dresses, jewelry, stuff like that.

- His uncles bothering the two of you. They’re constantly harassing and teasing you; just try to pay them no mind.

- Standing up for him when his uncles are being more awful than usual.

- He might be the only person you can really bond with in your town, considering the fact that whenever you have anybody over, they’re almost always harassed by his uncles and scared away. Which Casper may or may not be sort of happy about.

- Casper gets jealous pretty easily. Anytime another guy takes interest in you, he always feels the need to mock them behind their backs or be passive aggressively not so friendly whenever they approach you when you’re out with him. It’s best to not bring up guys in your class unless it’s obvious that they only like you as a friend; but even then he’d wonder why you need friends (even if they’re girls) other than him.

- He’s sort of overprotective of you. He just got his life back so he certainly doesn’t want anything bad happening and putting yours in danger.

- He absolutely hates fighting so whenever the two of you have an argument, he’s always quick to try and settle it and apologize; even if he doesn’t really think he’s done anything wrong.

- Saying “I love you” isn’t really his forte. He prefers saying and doing other things to show you that he does.

- The two of you sort of just have to go with the flow and see where your relationship takes you. You don’t know how exactly the rest of his “life” will go so you just try to enjoy the present and what you have right now.

[emiewritesthings]

doctor, doctor - jay halstead

jay halstead x fem!reader

summary: in which y/n takes it into her own hands to look after a sick jay 

a/n: i’m not gonna lie i think this is one of my fav things i’ve ever written, i would really appreciate some feedback and p.s the beginning of it is based on that scene from brooklyn 99 :)

masterlist

“okay, it’s 10 o’clock, meaning halstead is officially an hour late to work,” y/n announced as she appeared from the break room with a mug of poorly made coffee. looking around, she had immediately distracted everyone in the room with her playful smile. “okay let’s do this, theories!” she encouraged, taking a sip with excitement, but immediately regretting it as s he spat it back in the mug and abandoned it on adam’s desk as she leant against it.

“uh, he forgot to set his alarm?” antonio suggested, willing to play along with the little game that y/n had created. however clearly his answer didn’t suffice as y/n scrunched up her nose and shook her head in disappointment.

“you are a detective in a unit that just last week rescued 5 people kidnapped and used as chess pieces in a human sized version of the game and the best you could come up with is he forgot to set his alarm? pfft, disappointing, dawson. who’s willing to take this seriously?” she scoffed, brushing his idea off with a simple roll of the eyes as the group laughed at her ridiculousness. 

“maybe he has been murdered by a gang looking for revenge.” adam piped up, earning a sudden and rather forceful slap on the back as y/n cheered. her eyes looking over at antonio as she gestured towards the less experienced detective.

“yes, that’s what i’m talking about. bit dark, ruzek, but better than dawson’s,” y/n hummed, adam clearly pleased with the praise he had received by the pretty detective. “any one else wanna shot?” she offered it out into the room, suddenly the sound of rolling wheels on the chair had everyone turn to face al who was munching on a ham sandwich.

“he walked into the middle of a drug ring, slept with the kingpins daughter and is now having limbs removed, one by the hour.” suddenly an eery silence fell in the bullpen as al suddenly disappeared back to his desk and everyone was left with an image that she was sure was burned on the inside of everyones mind.

“uh, okay, someone might want to arrange a psych check for olinsky asap,” y/n mumbled, pointing in the direction where he had once been and looking around as if checking that she hadn’t been the only one to hear al’s suggestion. “anyways, all of you are wrong. clearly he has joined a motorbike gang and now makes his money on the road striking off names on the government’s hit list.” 

just as the room erupted into discussion about how idiotic this conversation was, as well as their ideas, the sound of footsteps caught y/n’s attention as she arrived at her desk. however as he reached the floor, the reason for his absence was clear.

“woah, you look like death.” adam chuckled, it immediately being silenced as jay sent a deadly glare his way. with his skin paler than normal with undertones of green, a layer of sweat draped over his forehead. jay flashed as smile at y/n as he passed, reaching his desk and collapsing on his chair with a wince. 

as everyone went back to what they were doing, y/n found herself straying her eyes away from her computer screen for longer and longer periods of time until she found herself by his side with a sickly sweet grin, pun intended. 

“i don’t wanna hear it, y/l/n.” jay mumbled, massaging his temples with his fingers hoping it would somehow sooth his pounding skull. whilst usually he had every minute of his day just to hear the woman chat away about whatever crossed her mind, he had found himself in quite the state since last night, leaving him restless and irritable.

“believe it or not, i just wanted to make sure you were alright,” y/n’s entire demeanour crumbled as she melted at the soft features of his face that came with being so vulnerable. but from the look in jay’s eyes, it was clear he didn’t 100% believe her excuse. “and to ask what the hell you think you are doing here? you are sick jay, you need to rest.” 

it was very rare that jay found himself ill. in the years that y/n had been working by the man’s side, she could count on one hand the times she had seen him with so much as a cough. in fact she had called him captain immune system for a period of time when she realised he was pretty much indestructible. y/n couldn’t deny the concern bubbling in her gut seeing him so weak.

“i’m fine,” with her eyes slitted in a look that practically shouted ‘bullshit’, jay continued. “i promise, it’s just a little cold. nothing serious, i think i’ll survive.” he joked dryly, finding it incredibly hard to look away from y/n for her eyes were filled with a warmth that he knew was an expression usually saved for those she cared deeply about. 

“yeah well, you need to take care of yourself, jay, i’m being serious. chicago can cope if you just have one day off, get your energy back.” 

y/n was reminded of the times she had the exact same words spoken to her by the exact person that didn’t seem to want to take them onboard. every time she had so much as a sniffle he would be straight over with some soup that his mother used to swear by and the name of a box set that he would put on for the two of them to watch as he sat stroking her hair in order to try and convince her body to rest. neither of them had anyone else to take care of them, so had taken it upon themselves to be that person for the other. 

“now, i’m gonna go tell voight that i’m taking you home before you infect this whole office.” before he could object, she had already ran (not literally but jay was impressed by her speed walking) to her boss’ office. knocking on the door, with a sweet smile and a sea of words running off her tongue so quickly that voight had to agree just to shut her up, y/n returned by his side. “come on, germ face, your carriage awaits.” 

“you know i love it when you talk dirty to me, y/l/n.” winking at her, y/n giggled as she supported him back down the stairs and out of the station. the two chatted away, y/n explaining how she thought al was secretly a sociopath and jay filing her in on the newest instalment of his apartment block drama until they pulled up in front of jay’s apartment building. 

as they walked through the door, jay’s arm resting around y/n’s shoulders as he struggled to find strength, they managed to reach the sofa before y/n’s body gave up. both of them letting out large breathes before looking at each other and falling into laughter. 

“you hungry, i could try making your mom’s soup?” y/n asked, as she pushed herself up to look down at the man. her hair falling down around her face and tickling jay’s skin. “i’m sure it won’t be as good as her’s but i’m willing to give it a try.” 

the way she was sat with the large window gleaming light behind her, y/n almost looked like an angel. her eyes and smile were wide, with her beauty wrapping its hands around jay’s neck squeezing until his head felt light and he nearly reached up to touch her porcelain skin. but jay had noticed the sensation way before he was blocked up with a cold.

“yeah, uh, that sounds nice.” jay agreed with a minimal amount of sass, but y/n didn’t seem to notice as she moved off the cushions and towards the kitchen. she had pretty much memorised the recipe when jay had finally given it to her on her birthday after offering to pay for it multiple times. whizzing around the kitchen, she was too busy to notice the tired eyes admiring her from afar. 

jay wished his mom was alive to see the woman that she would have loved. all the times he had brought girls back to his family when he was younger didn’t add up to an ounce of the beauty and power that y/n held in her middle finger. the way she bit back at his wit, but also had the ability to spot when he was upset from the other side of the city. she was everything her mother wanted in a daughter in law, everything she wanted for her little boy. 

“okay, give me your honest opinion. i can take it i promise.” y/n sudden appeared with a tray that held a large bowl of the semi-thick orange liquid, a glass of water and a couple pills. approaching jay, she carefully helped him up from where he laid and placed it onto his lap. “actually that was a complete lie, do not tell me the truth. i may just cry.” 

“why thank you, nurse y/l/n.” he teased.

“it’s doctor actually.” she quipped back.

jay chuckled lowly, as he grabbed the spoon and took a large spoonful to his mouth. feeling the slight sting of his tongue at the heat, it was only when the flavours hit that he was suddenly transported to an earlier time in his life. a simpler time. only this time there was y/n by his side. 

“the verdict?” she prompted, taking a seat besides him, pulling her knees up to her chest. 

“not sure whether i want to tell you, don’t think you’ll fit in this room if your ego grows any bigger.” y/n grinned as she leaned over to press a kiss against his shoulder. jay closed his eyes at the contact, feeling the ache in his body freeze for a moment as it registered the tingling sensation. “all jokes aside, it really is good.” 

“i’m glad, your mother was a smart woman.” she nodded, leaning forward to turn tv on. jay continued to spoon the soup into his mouth, as y/n chose a show that they both had started together and had refused to watch another minute without the other. y/n leaned back making herself comfortable, having already texted voight telling him that she would most likely need the entire day off, and getting the go ahead, she had no plans other than being by jay’s side for the next however many hours. 

it was sometime in the early evening and the tv continued to emit light, but neither jay nor y/n was paying any attention to the drama. jay, with his head on y/n lap, was leaning into her touch as her short, thin fingers ran through the dark strands that sprouted from his scalp. his body wrapped in a blanket that y/n had grabbed from his room, he felt completely at peace. 

“you know what, i think you are more bearable when you are at death’s door.” y/n joked quietly, as the forest green eyes were exposed back to her own. jay groaned in annoyance, realising that there was no sweet y/n without the sharped tongue y/n. a trait he adored, but at his own expense. 

“and to think i was starting to think you had gone soft on me, y/l/n.” he hummed, wishing he could forever have her giggle on repeat wherever he went, for the sound made goosebumps run down his neck and down his arms, like some kind of magic that only y/n possessed. 

“as much as i love you, i can’t risk my bad ass reputation for you.” 

although jay was sure it was just part of her banter, the moment the ‘i love you’ fell off her tongue, he found himself wide awake, unable to push past the feeling in his gut as it looped over again and again in his mind. y/n could see the conflict in his face, as he glanced up at her with something she had never noticed before. 

“you mean it?” he asked. 

“mean what?” confused, her fingers fell from his hair, making jay regret ever opening his mouth.

“do you really, you know, love me?” he knew he had committed too far to try and retreat. maybe he could blame it on the fact he couldn’t think straight, although she was like a lie detector that wouldn’t let such a bogus excuse pass. y/n blinked down at him, watching as he sat up to look at her with a hunger that needed to be addressed. swallowing the lump in her throat, y/n nodded.

“of course, you are one of my best friends, jay.” it was true, but it wasn’t the full truth, both of them knew that.

“i didn’t realise we had started lying to one another,” jay’s eyes were soft, as he reached to place his hand against her cheek, smiling as she slowly leaned into it. closing her eyes, she tried to find what direction she was looking for, but didn’t dare take the first step. without even thinking, jay jutted forward and captured her lips before they could form a single syllable. 

gently, but passionately, jay and y/n moved their lips against the others. the feeling was ever-growing as the kiss deepened and deepened until they had no choice to pull back, deprived of their ability to breath. as jay’s eyes came back into view, y/n, for the first time in her life, had lost the ability to form a sentence. 

“we just...” she began but it ran off quickly. jay chuckled.

“we did.”

the two sat in silence, examining the other one’s face until y/n found herself moving forward until she was sat in his lap, legs wrapped around his waist as she pressed her lips against his. just like before their bodies and minds were set ablaze with desire and what had remained unspoken for what felt like forever. jay had nearly completely forgotten about the illness that had put him in the care of the woman that he craved more than anything else the world had to offer. 

as their lips parted ways, suddenly the air had thinned and everything felt... normal. jay’s lips were unable to break out of the large grin mould that y/n had put them in, which was soon mirrored by the young woman. a small giggle escaping her lips.

“if i get whatever it is you have, i expect the exact same treatment.” 

“only for you, doctor y/l/n.”