#also gender non conformity is my gender

[dogbrained-les]

Crap, I might not be as much of a binary woman as I thought I was

[tic-loud-tic-proud]

"Maybe white men wouldn't have overwhelmingly voted for Trump if it wasn't for feminists telling them they're bad all the time!!1!!" Weird how everything men do ends up being women's fault somehow

[axel-tiredstudent]

(Gender nonconforming) Sunarin doodles + Osamu

[nightmarish-fallen-angel]

You know, the whole "soft uwu boy transmasc" stereotype can be very annoying because like. I might consider myself to kinda fall in that stereotype. And the way people talk about it is just,, gross?

Like I'm nonbinary but still consider myself partially a boy. And the way people talk about those stereotypes gives the impression that they just see us as girls or women lite. I'm just a gnc guy, but it makes me uncomfortable whenever those jokes are made.

I don't know why dunking on gnc men (cis or trans) is so common, but it just makes me feel icky. Like I'm not dressing like this to be your plaything or the butt of the joke, I'm just existing.

[slaygentford]

hiiiii hello i just wanted to talk to you about the gendered nature of the show because i saw your totally correct posts. you're right, the reason why to some people, lestat is "mother" IS because of racism!! there is no subtlety or metaphor to this show, louis IS the woman in their marriage. and not just his and lestat's, louis is the woman in his and armand's marriage too, no matter the weird dynamic they have. he experiences not just racism, but misogyny too. i watch this show and literally see my mother and father in loustat's relationship. (i love it so much, i love gothic horror and narratives!!!). and yeah, lestat has dressed in drag and may move and emote in a non-typically masculine way that modern audiences aren't used to seeing - but he is Pater Familias. He is louis' father-husband, like, it's all spelled out for the audience over and over!!! lestat is the same way in the books too! lestat may cry and dress flamboyantly, but that doesn't mean he isn't Lord and Master over all of the other vampires at some point. its both awful and titillating to see! but what isn't, is peoples obvious/unconscious racist biases. anyway, just wanted to say you're so correct and right! and!! your blog is very fun, you make me think about this show in a very engaging way, and i hope your week has been going well! <3

us rn. exactly

[outlying-hyppocrate]

lullaby #2 - becoming a dream: to be resolved, eventually

[zonedoutart]

Here’s my OC, Killemot drawn by @illegal-d

Her name is Killimot she’s kinda of a rebellious punk. Learning how to play the electric guitar but can slam ya face in quite good with it.

Has a pet mouse named Skullcrusher that she loves dearly

DD loves skullcrusher too!! Such a cute mouse!

[queeratlast]

Episode 1 - La Maupin

Take a closer look at the illustration we discuss during Episode 1, which focuses on Julie d'Aubigny, or La Maupin as she was known - an incredible figure whose life blurs the boundaries of fact and fiction. See end of post for references.

The image (shown above) is an illustration by Aubrey Beardsley made for Gautier’s Mademoiselle de Maupin A Romance of Love and Passion. It has several queer connections in its own right.

The book

Mademoiselle de Maupin A Romance of Love and Passion was published by Theophile Gautier in 1899. The story was inspired by the life of La Maupin, but rather than attempting to be a facts-based portrayal of her life, it takes her identity as a cross-dressing swordswoman and runs with it. The story centers around a young couple, Chevalier d’Albert and his mistress Rosette, who have both fallen in love with the dashing "Théodore de Sérannes". Unbeknownst to either of them, Théodore is in fact a woman in disguise.

While d'Albert has a sexual identity crisis (a classic trope: the Li Shang of the 19th century, if you will), Rosette attempts to seduce "Théodore" in a very erotically charged scene. Finally, the truth is revealed and "Théodore" reveals herself to both her lovers, spending half the night with d'Albert and the other with Rosette. The reader is left to draw their own conclusions about what could have transpired between the two woman, something that could not be explicitely written at the time.

In the morning their mysterious lover has gone, leaving only a note:

Comfort poor Rosette as well as you can, for she must be at least as sorry for my departure as you are. Love each other well in memory of me, whom both of you have loved, and breathe my name sometimes in a kiss.

Theophile Gautier, Mademoiselle de Maupin: A Romance of Love and Passion

In 1922, the novel was condemmed for its portrayal of adultery and homosexuality by the New York Society for the Suppression of Vice.

The artist

Aubrey Beardsley published six illustrations for this work in 1898 - he had originally intended to illustrate the entire novel, but the project proved too intensive and costly and was abandoned. You may well recognise the style of the illustration - Beardsley was a very well known artist from the 19th century whose distinctive art nouveau style was inspired by Japanese woodcuts. He was deliberatively provocative: as Tate Britain put it, "his works explore the erotic and the elegant, the humorous and grotesque."

His works explored sexual freedom and gender fluidity, and he loved to include provocative elements in his drawings. Some of his drawings were particularly explicit and "obscene" - so much so that they couldn't be published, but were instead distributed to private collectors through discrete channels. Beardsley was part of the asthetic movement, a group of artists who strove to create art freed from Victorian notions of morality and rigid establishment ideas, to create a "cult of beauty."

As part of this movement he came into contact with Oscar Wilde, and Wilde comissioned the young artist to illustrate his play Salomé. Beardsley's drawings were incredibly erotic and upturned conventions for portraying women in the era. This was a daring take for a play already in hot water for its depictions of biblical characters. When Wilde was arrested on charges of gross indecency, Beardsley was dammed for his percieved association with the playright. A mob attacked the office of the magazine Beardsley worked for and he was forced to resign from his position as editor.

"I have one aim – the grotesque. If I am not grotesque, I am nothing"

Aubrey Beardsley, 1897

References and further reading (and listening!) for this episode:

Illustration:

https://www.tate.org.uk/whats-on/tate-britain/aubrey-beardsley/exhibition-guide

https://www.vam.ac.uk/articles/an-introduction-to-the-aesthetic-movement

https://archive.org/details/mademoiselledema00gaute/page/n1/mode/2up

La Maupin's life:

Dictionnaire Des Théâtres De Paris, Volume 3, 1757

Women In Men’s Guise, Oscar Gilbert, 1926

Gallant Ladies, Cameron Rogers, 1928

By the Sword, Richard Cohen, 2002.

https://www.lapl.org/collections-resources/blogs/lapl/julie-daubigny-la-maupin-and-early-french-opera

https://www.historicmysteries.com/history/julie-daubigny/26646/

https://kellygardiner.com/fiction/books/goddess/the-real-life-of-julie-daubigny/

https://podbay.fm/p/bad-gays/e/1679976000

https://clairemead.com/2022/06/17/la-maupin/

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p0cncgq8

[in-tua-deep]

Pros of cutting ur hair super short:

The speediest showers AND using less shampoo

Discover new facts about urself - apparently I have a little strawberry birthmark on the back of my neck near my hairline I never knew about lol and I have a little patch of lighter hair

More likely to be correctly gendered

Shockingly easy to style, like WAY easier than the discouragers implied and takes like. a whole maybe two minutes max of my day. honestly that’s a generous max

Good texture feel when u rub the shortest bits and feel like a grizzly itching on a tree when u rub the back of ur head on the couch

Less (noticeable?) shedding

Cooler in the very hot weather

Tits look huge

Cats do not try to grab hair assuming it is a toy

Realize u are transforming into ur father

Running hands through the front and feeling like an extra in Grease B)

Barbershops charge like. way less honestly. this feels incredibly dumb bc my barber was incredibly attentive and it felt way more involved than my old hair cuts wtf

New hair place has a bunch of pride flags hanging everywhere to look at and it’s got the best and safest vibe of any place I’ve ever had my hair cut tbh

Cons of cutting ur hair super short:

Tits look huge

Cats do not try to grab hair assuming it is a toy

Realize u are transforming into ur father

Probability of getting sunburn on ur neck increases

Increased annoyance that ur hair is a factor in being correctly gendered

May have to purchase a hat or ear muffs for winter bc cold ears

???

No other downsides why didn’t I do this years ago

[rosefires20]

Mentally insane over One Piece every day these days.

God. The amount of rants and tangets I could go on about the characters, world, themes, settings, situations, writing, designs, and and and and and and and

Honestly it boils down to how human One Piece is. Like the whole is complete fantasy but the characters themselves are relatable and realistic. I always think about how openly emotionally the main cast is and how important that is to see in literature and media. The situations are also realistic and occur in different ways in real life and history which makes the world so much deeper and interesting to explore.

It has its issues, but it also has an insane amount of good and interpretative themes and aspects that help balance some of the issues.

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

Sometimes I see sexuality or gender headcanons about characters and im just like dude im pretty sure they don't know what half those words mean

[asinglesock]

incredibly weird gendered feelings when I shave my face. I do it to perform femininity but I feel even more masculine shaving than I do when I have visible hair on my face.

[pirateboy]

dennis rodman will literally be like i'm probably mentally bisexual and have a fixation that i want to be with another guy and fantasise about it often and when i find men attractive i like to kiss them and tell them how beautiful they are. but this is completely normal everybody's thought about gay sex before and haven't you kissed male relatives you're close with before yes this is exactly the same thing

[dixidin]

I nearly forgot to post this, but two words can sum up my whole experience with the new spider verse movie. I cried

[ozimagines]

Hello there! I haven’t ever seen you write for this character, so I completely understand if you don’t wish to. I was wondering if you had any thoughts about Jeremiah Cloutier falling for someone? If possible, a masc/gender non-conforming person? As I said, totally okay if not! I hope you have a good weekend.

Absolutely! I don’t write him often, you’re right, but he was a fascinating character with a great portrayal by Luke Perry. And a Holy man with a masc/non-gender conforming reader gives the possibility for some interesting character studies.

(Also y’all are so polite in your asks!🥹 I’ll take them all! I love Oz character imagines and will always take the opportunity to try something new!)

Jeremiah Cloutier falling for a Masc/Gender Non-Conforming Reader would include…

He’s a man of God. He knows this about himself.

Since he was young, he knew that he had a higher calling. 👼

He stays friendly with all those in his parish, keeps close with his flock, as it were. They’re all pretty standard church goers, nothing unexpected. (All gender conforming)

So it wasn’t hard for his eyes to fall on you in the middle of a sermon one day.

It was odd. At first you were an affront to his sensibilities, and he wanted to pivot his sermon to talk about what God expects from men and what he expects of women… but his tongue stops before he can start.

He sees the way others regard you, like some sort of insult.

But he lets you stay.

Because just as you are unlike those in his congregation in appearances, you are also unlike them in your actions.

They largely come once a week and forget him for the other six days unless they have to win a political debate.

You’re focused. Intimidatingly so. But you’re not staring at him. You’re staring through him.

It takes him a minute to realize you’re inspecting the stained glass windows behind him. Looking at something he struggles to see even though he’s stared at that same window himself as he prays.

After the sermon, he shakes some hands, kisses some babies, all that’s expected of him.

But he pushes through people to make sure you don’t leave without him speaking to you.

It’s not hard to find you, you’re still sitting in the pew with your head down, lips moving but no sounds leaving.

He sits down next to you, and you immediately take notice.

“Reverend!”😳

He stops you instantly.

“Please, continue to pray. I’ll do the same.”

You sit in silence, both your heads down, both in deep concentration.

When everyone leaves, he turns to you.

“I’ve… well, you’ve never been to service before.”

You blush a little and stutter.

“I… wasn’t supposed to be here this time.”

You explain that you were sitting in the pew when the service started, and when people started to file in, you just stayed.😂

“What were you praying for, my child?”

“I… don’t know if I was.”

You explain you have a rocky relationship with the church. That you were told from a very young age what God expected from you… and you weren’t sure it was a contract you wanted.

He asks why you came into a church at all, still patient.

Cloutier is different from some of the other Christians in Oz; he’s pompous and self assured but he’s curious, with a mind that won’t let him leave an unturned stone.

“It’s that window.”

You point to the stained glass window with a sheepish look. It’s Jesus and Mary, surrounded by angels.

“You think that’s what they look like? The angels, I mean?”

He starts to go on this long spiel on how one interprets the Bible but you stop him.

“That’s not what I’m asking. Every time I see an angel in print, they have white wings… in stained glass, it’s rainbow, like a parrots. And when the light hits it right, they glow. I wonder… if the angels only have white wings, or are some of them rainbow?”🌈

He genuinely does not know how to answer that question, and he finds himself staring at that same stained glass window with a totally different view.

You apologize for crashing his sermon, but he assures you all are welcome in God’s house. ⛪️✝️

You thank him but have heard that before.

Next week, he searches the crowd for your face but you aren’t there.

You aren’t there for two more sermons.

When he finally sees you, it’s on a Wednesday night. He’s alone in the church after a mid-week sermon, when he hears the church doors open. The main doors are always open to allow people to pray.

He leaves his office and sees you sitting in the same pew, staring at the stained glass window. He cannot stop his own smile.

You apologize again, and ask if you’re disturbing him.

He insists you’re not and that he’s just working on the Sunday service.

“I’ve been thinking about what you asked, about the rainbow angels.”

He explains that the Bible is moral law written in poetic form, but that it’s all true. You smile as he explains in his vanilla Christian style; nothing you haven’t heard before, again.

You’re quiet while he talks, and as he does, he looks directly into your eyes. You have wonderfully bright and vivacious eyes.

He starts to broach the obvious subject.

“There are certain… lifestyles… that are against God’s plan-“

You stop him. You tell him you’ve heard that before too. That God’s love is conditional in every sense of the word.

When you weren’t sure who you were, you hated yourself and everyone still loved you. Now that you know who you are, you love yourself and everyone hates you.

“There’s no room for rainbow angels in God’s plan.”😭

He doesn’t really have an answer for that. He’d delivered sermons against non-traditional lifestyles (largely LGBTQIA+ 🏳️‍🌈 🏳️‍⚧️) so how could he tell you he thought any different?

But he’d never seen this side before. You were hurting but not because you were at war with yourself, but because everyone seemed at war with you.

He tells you that while he was firm in his position on God, that his door is always open to you. That he’d be there to guide you.

He prays that night. He prays that you find your way; that you follow God’s plan and become a churchgoer.

As he does this his heart aches. All he can picture is your words and your searching eyes.

“There’s no room for rainbow angels in God’s plan.”

You come over next Wednesday after service. He’s got his head in the Bible again, lovingly searching over its words.

You ask him what the draw is. Why he loves harder than most.

“It’s His love. It’s boundless and everlasting.”

You wonder how he can think that when half his sermons are just lists of exceptions.

He appreciates your candor and asks your relationship with God.

“Estranged. For a long time, I wanted his love more than anything. When it was clear that it didn’t belong to me as I am, I wanted nothing to do with it… and now…”

“And now…?” He continues, hand reaching out to yours to comfort you.

“Now I know something. Either God is all powerful and not all knowing or he’s all knowing and not all powerful, and if he is that… then he’s just like us. And he deserves a break too. I think God made us like a science experiment, but then we got out of hand. And now he can only watch.”

He tells you the best way to solidify your relationship with God is to follow his plan. That he is all knowing and all powerful. That his love is worth it.

You shake your head, heatedly, insisting that any God without imperfection is a tyrant expecting obedience on threat of abandonment and eternal suffering. That he couldn’t possibly understand what it is to exist in the modern world.

You two talk for hours, hardly seeing eye to eye, but with the sweet canter of his voice, you know his words never come from a place of anger.

You thank him for spending this time with you. For listening, even if he didn’t agree.

He tells you again that you’re welcome any time, and that he’s made a lifetime commitment to being God’s messenger, and if he can convey any of that to you, then he’s happy.

He tells you he’s glad, and squeezes your hand… for a little too long. You realize this and so does he.

He can’t get you out of his head the next few days. So few people in his congregation met with him after hours just to talk biblical philosophy.

You cared more than most.

He seeks council on his feelings from the last person who’d expect to see him

Father Mukada was shocked as Reverend Cloutier entered his office. 🤯

They greet each other like old friends and then get straight to business.

“There’s this… person. He… she… this person is not a… traditional member of either of our flocks. But… they have questions…”

He explains the rainbow angels theory, and Mukada listens with the open heart he’s always had. Cloutier says he wants you as a part of his congregation. Mukada asks the very reasonable question… why?

Because you try. Because you’re searching for answers he wants to give you. Because you’re hurting, and that’s exactly why he became a Reverend.

“Because he’s hurting. I’ve… always assumed the homosexuals and… well… others… were at war within themselves. He seems at peace within and at war against his own will. I know in my heart he deserves peace, but I was taught the oath he’s on is promised none. Father Mukada, how do you guide someone away from their own peace?”🕊️

Mukada thinks for a second.

“We often, as Holy men, have to balance our self assuredness lest it become self righteousness.” -Mukada, MD.

“I’ll invite the child into my flock. Offer to teach him.”

“Teach but don’t judge.”

*sweats in Christian* -Cloutier, probably

You meet with him after service on Wednesday.

“What did you think of the sermon?”🥰

“A little dry.” -teasing him😛

He invited you into his quarters and asks about your life. What lead you to his church?

You admit you grew up around religion. You don’t specify whether or not you were or weren’t or your family. You’re guarded.

He realizes it’s because you have to be.

You mention a study abroad trip to the Vatican. You mentioned the duomi and the stained glass and the murals.

“The glass behind the Priest started to glow as the sun was setting. And the white doves so carefully crafted just shined and the gold on the organ… it was blinding.”

“The light of God.” -he smiles

You smile sadly back.

“They asked me to leave.”

His smile drops off his face. His face flushed as he knows he had banned others in your position. He never felt like more of an ass in his life.

“All I could think about were the angels on the side wall. Rainbow. Not like the ones painted on the wall. They glowed, and casted colored light in all directions.”

He asks you why you gravitate towards the angels who are… “different”

You chuckle. You know what he’s asking.

“All you need to know is my pronouns are he/they, and I don’t often fit into one category or the other. Sometimes I’m both. Sometimes I’m neither. Normally masculine leaning though.”

Your face lights up as you say this. He notices that immediately. Your eyes just… glowed. Sparkling like the window you mentioned.

“Were you born a-“

“All you need to know,” you restate clearly, but not unkindly, “is my pronouns are he/they, my name is Y/N, and I’ve never felt more like myself than I do right now.”☺️

He takes the hint and for the second time that day, feels like an ass😅

“God gives his toughest battles-“

“-to his strongest soldiers.” You finish with a sly grin. “Is that not what you were going to say?”

He grins back. He knows you’re just teasing, but he feels bad using his C-material on an A+ person like you. So he leveled with you.

“My whole belief system says you’re wrong. Everything. It says if you don’t suffer the wrath of God in this life, then you will in the other.” He backpedals, feeling sick having to say this to your face. “I’m sorry, that’s just what it is. I am only a messenger of God.” 🙃

You smile at him a little sadly. You had to know this is what he thought. Or what he had been repeating his whole life.

“When in your life did you feel most like yourself?” -you ask, with a burst of confidence.

“When I was studying.” He found himself saying. “When I was in school to become a reverend. I have a degree in Christian studies. And I read the words of God… it read like poetry.”

“Like the Odyssey, or the Iliad…” you muse to yourself, and he silently pardons your blaspheme. “I don’t mean that pejoratively. Those are epic tales of morality and humility and human weakness and the divine. It’s gorgeous. Always has been.”

“You’ve read the Bible…?”🥹🥹🥹

“Cover to cover. Made notes in the margined of mine.”

“I do that too!” He exclaims, popping an excellent, radiant smile. You can’t help but stare a second. He opens the pages of his to show you like an excited young boy.

You talk biblical for hours, into the wee morning.

“You are unlike any person I’ve ever met.” He muses over you, and you realize he’s stroking your hand.

He realizes too and stops, wishing you a good day and walking you out to your car. The sun is coming up over buildings in the distance. 🌇

He cancels your next appointment. He needs time to think.

He goes to his confidant in everything; God. He sits in his pew, just thinking and praying. He asks for an answer. Why does he care for you so when you are supposed to be something he rages against? Why can’t he stop thinking about you? Why can’t he get those rainbow angels out of his mind?

He sits down with a pad and paper, and with one more look towards the heavens above, he lets God guide his hand and smiles as he writes, for the first time in a long time, he’s enjoying this sermon.

Sunday service! You were specifically invited this time by Jeremiah. He gets to the pulpit, and opens his notes, casting a smiling, knowing glance at you.

“Miracles. Ask an ye shall receive. We’re all praying and searching. Miracles are what we call it when God answers a prayer. But do we love all miracles? Or just those who come to us in the form in which we intended?”

The crowd shifts a little, but you’re not focusing on him. The sun is coming up behind him, and the Reverend started to shine. His eyes bounced around the room, not wildly though, each eye contact was meaningful and said something personal. He brushed his shaggy hair out of his face in his passion.

You were in awe of this man.

“God’s job isn’t to give us what we want, it’s to give us what we need. But when it’s an answer other than the one we wanted, we have a tendency to reject God’s hand.”

He turns behind him and gestures largely for the audience.

“For in the purity of the white angel wings, we lose the light of God, who does not appear in just one color, just one sound, just one sensation. When the Lord Almighty sends you a rainbow angel,”

His eyes flit to you, and you see a smile grace his face.

“After a period of rain and turmoil, you accept it, knowing God has sent you what you need.”

His entire congregation erupts, all thanking him and praising him and still side-eying you.

You wait for the congregation to leave him alone by sitting in the pew and waiting for him.

He doesn’t wait. He pushes past his regulars to you. It starts to piss him off as they all tell him they agree with the sermon, and still found enough hate in their hearts to judge you.

“Y/N!”

You hear some whispers including your d/n, and Jeremiah flushes. He pushes back his hair again, clenching his Bible, and saying,

“Y/N, will be jointing our congregation… if they so choose. They’re… about the best person I’ve met in a long time. Sometimes, I lose myself in the fire and brimstone, and forget the beauty our faith has to offer. Y/N here has helped me get in touch with that beauty.”

His flock is… confused. But as most of them considered questioning their Holy man a blaspheme, they went along with it and you were welcomed, some genuinely moved by his speech and some just forcing a smile.

You’re not really focused on any of them. You and Jeremiah have been staring at each other the whole day. You stay behind to talk to them.

“So… you still trying to save me?” -you ask, teasingly. He smiles.

“Actually, I was hoping you could save me.” 🥹

He takes your hand and leads you to the front with him. He kneels you down before the stained glass window. He kneels as well, right next to you, bowing his head.

You think he’s about to ask God go his blessing or his forgiveness… all he says is a humble “thank you.”

You take things slow. You have to.

But he enjoys talking the Bible with you, as well as other poetic/moral pieces.

He takes you to his favorite diner where he writes some of his sermons. That there was a waitress there who was sixty two, who had served him since he was young who he loved.

You learn about his preferences; he’s a simple man, but appreciates quality.

He likes hot chocolate, and though he doesn’t say this, you know mini marshmallows are his favorite part.

His favorite flowers are Queen Anne’s Lace, and he often gets them for you because he thinks they look lovely in your hair or on your lapel.

Takes him a minute to get the hang of dating someone masculine. He’s attracted to you to be sure but he’s a baby gay, so you have to be gentle😅

Likes watching old movies with you. Like Road To movies with Bobe Hope and Bing Crosby. Sings softly to you, and not very well 🤣

He actually likes baking a lot, and works with you to make cupcakes and cookies for the church bake sale. He likes light blue and decorated the cupcakes accordingly.

You take him to Karaoke once; he hates it immediately but doesn’t act all dicky and pathetic about it. Just lets you enjoy your time. 🎤

When he kisses you, it takes you both by surprise even though he asks.

“I just want to try something. Here.”

Leans forward and kisses you gently on the lips. You lean in a little bit try not to scare him off. It’s nice; a calming experience.

He holds your hand often, and lets you hold onto his arm at church functions.

He smiles at you often; it’s like he can’t help himself.

He’s not Catholic, so there’s not really a rule for celibacy… but it takes him a looong time to get there.

When he is there it’s a loving experience, joyful and natural; just two people enjoying the other’s company. He caresses and holds you afterwards, kissing your neck and cheek and ear.

Says I love you in the most elaborate way possible; you just laugh.

“God tells us we must love one another. That we must be there for others at every juncture, and when you commit yourself to one person, you are to love and honor them as you would love and honor him-”

“I love you too, Jeremiah.”❤️

You two build a life together, and though it’s not to say no one tries to interfere with this “non-traditional” couple, but you two are just too happy and at peace to care.

You found your person. Just someone to go through life with. Someone to stand in line with at the grocery store, or read a book with after dinner.

You and Jeremiah both quote Buddha (though Jeremiah calls him a prophet sometimes): Peace comes from within. Do not seek without.

Bonus: Jeremiah chews gum feverishly when he’s writing his sermons. Helps him think. You always leave a gum packet on the desk next to him. Sometimes you find fun flavors from around the world. He quite likes the dragonfruit one, but will pass on the licorice one in the future 😂

[cartridgeconverter]

Trying to put my thoughts about Virgilia and Marcius into words but all I can do is SHAKES YOU. THE FAMILY DYNAMIC THAT VOLUMNIA IS FORCING THEM INTO. like atp it’s not even about sexual or romantic attraction it’s about the fact that they’re both being fit into boxes that have nothing to do with what they want! and of course Marcius has been raised to be a war machine since childhood but Virgilia MARRIED into this family she’s still holding strong. and she isn’t forceful in the way Volumnia wants her to be and she doesn’t know anything about war but they would have this understanding with each other that’s unique. Marcius is so isolated emotionally from everyone including his mother because of his upbringing but Virgilia gets that — she’s experiencing it constantly!

OH OH OH and Aufidius and Marcius also bond because of mutual understanding! because they’re also trapped as figureheads of war, like Marcius is literally “from face to foot […] a thing of blood”, and he has nothing else to his identity! they’re idolized so much by the people as warriors that there can be no more to them! okay I have to stop here because if I get into the homoeroticism of war I will simply not sleep but SOMEONE REMIND ME OF THIS WHEN I HAVE ACCESS TO A KEYBOARD