#also feel free to ask me any questions that you have about any part of the process
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cherryblossom-heart · 1 day ago
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Responsibilities (6/?)
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bestfriend!Nanami x Reader (SMAU)
Masterlist
A birthday celebration brings out unexpected information
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
Content warning: a dash of angst in the end, enjoy haha.
A/N: Hi besties! We are getting close to the end. Even if I don't exactly have everything planned for this I know I'm getting close to the big finale. Also side note, I feel so evil for this but just trust the process . You're welcomed to send me an ask with any comments, questions, etc., you have on this. 😊
Update on part 6.5 and 7
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If you like the story please interact: reblogs, likes and comments go a long way. Feedback is always appreciated! Feel free to message me about it.
Taglist
@ermbehindyou @totallygyomeiswife @ash4ree @lov3vivian @namjooningera @sleepykittyenergy @silllly-jokesterr @shigarika @7haze @lizzie3d2y @jaybirdluvr73 @sweetdreams-inumimi @anuncalledbridge @troyesivanfrl @lavenderdaydream97 @n4tr3ad5 @aldebrana @erintaro
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helioooss · 2 days ago
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my favourite ex
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synopsis: when minjeong dumped you over a year ago, nobody thought that you’d still be chasing after her: your favourite ex.
w/c: roughly 9.5k+
warnings: swearing, making out. winter’s a bit of an ass. law terminology when i actually know nothing about it and university as a whole (this hurt my fucking brain cause i went to uni for a week then dropped out). some angst here and there. (is it even a helios fanfic without a tinge of angst???)
a/n: merry christmas again - first detailed make out scene, lmao :)
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the class was buzzing when you rolled in, skateboard strapped to your back, oversized “i love my ex” shirt proudly displayed for the world — or rather, for one person in particular, to see. you could feel the weight of the stares, the judgmental whispers blending with poorly concealed laughter, but it didn’t bother you.
at least, that’s what you told yourself.
“mate, you have got to be fucking kidding me,” ryujin said the moment she spotted you, her eyebrows shooting up so high they practically disappeared into her hairline. she nudged yeji, who turned around from her seat and immediately burst into laughter.
“you’re actually wearing that?” yeji cackled, pointing at your shirt as if it wasn’t blatantly obvious what it said. “y/n, come on. you’ve got to stop giving her free real estate in your head.”
“she’s not in my head,” you argued, dropping your bag on the floor with a thud. “she’s in my heart.”
“jesus christ,” ryujin groaned, burying her face in her hands like she couldn’t bear to look at you anymore. “you’re so down bad it’s embarrassing, just gets worse everyday.”
beomgyu leaned back in his chair, grinning from ear to ear as he tilted his head to study your shirt. “honestly, respect. this level of delusion? it’s kind of iconic.”
“thanks gyu,” you plopped down on the seat next to him with a smile.
“no, i mean it,” he said, gesturing wildly with his hands. “like, who does this? who actually wears an ‘i love my ex’ shirt to a class they share with their ex?”
“me,” you said, grinning to yourself. “because i’m not a coward.”
yeji snorted. “no, you’re just stupid.”
you ignored her, your eyes flickering to the other side of the room. there she was, in all her glory: kim minjeong, your ex-girlfriend, sitting with her clique like a queen holding court. yizhuo was whispering something to her, and whatever it was made her smirk — the type that used to make your knees weak.
that felt like a lifetime ago.
she looked flawless, of course. she always did. her hair was tied back in a loose ponytail, a few strands falling perfectly into place and she was dressed like she’d walked straight out of a magazine; simple yet effortlessly elegant.
even the way she was sitting, legs crossed and her arm draped casually over the back of her chair, made it impossible to look away.
you weren’t the only one staring. everyone in the room was drawn to her in some way, whether they wanted to admit it or not.
she was one of the richest girls at yonsei, part of the infamous clique of untouchables: minjeong, jimin, yizhuo and aeri. together, they were a force of nature, the kind of people who ruled the social hierarchy without even trying.
and yet, once upon a time, minjeong had been yours. your gaze lingered on her, memories flooding in uninvited. the late-night study sessions where she’d tutored you in the basics of tort law, her patience wearing thin every time you made a dumb joke to avoid answering a question.
the rare moments when her cold exterior would crack and she’d laugh; a soft, genuine sound that made your chest ache with something you didn’t understand back then.
the way she used to look at you, like you were the most infuriating person in the world but also someone she couldn’t quite let go of.
“don’t even think about it,” yeji warned, snapping her fingers in front of your face. “do not embarrass yourself any further, y/n.”
“what do you mean?” you asked, tearing your eyes away from the love of your life.
“you’re literally about to get up and try to sit with her,” she deadpanned.
“i was not!” you protested, even though the thought had definitely crossed your mind.
“oh, for sure you were,” ryujin whined, rolling her eyes. “you’re like a moth to a flame. except the flame is your rich, hot ex who dumped you in the middle of the busiest hallway on campus. remember that?”
as if you could forget.
the image was burned into your brain — the way she’d stood there, her voice calm and detached as she said: “i’m bored of you, y/n.”
the flood of emotions when people had stopped to watch, their whispers growing louder with each passing second. the way your chest had caved in, like all the air had been sucked out of the room.
but you’d smiled through it. laughed, even. told her it was fine, that you understood. because you did. you understood minjeong better than anyone else, knew that her coldness was just a shield she used to keep people at arm’s length.
she’d come around eventually, you were sure of it. you just had to wait.
“oh my god, you’re still thinking about her, aren’t you?” yeji groaned. “y/n, move on. she’s not worth it.”
“she’s absolutely worth it,” you said, crossing your arms over your chest.
“no, she’s not,” ryujin said firmly. “she’s cold, distant, and —”
“hot,” beomgyu interjected.
“— and way out of your league,” ryujin finished, ignoring him.
“i don’t care,” you muttered, glancing back at minjeong. she caught your eye for a brief moment, her expression unreadable, before she turned away.
your chest ached.
god, you missed her so much it hurt.
“you’re hopeless,” yeji muttered, shaking her head.
you sighed, leaning back in your chair as professor cho walked in and started the lecture. you tried to focus, really, you did, but every time you glanced in minjeong’s direction, you were reminded of everything you’d lost — and everything you were still desperately hoping to get back.
the class was dead silent, except for professor cho’s monotone voice droning on about the intricacies of criminal law. your head was propped up on your hand, and you let out a long, slow yawn that you didn’t even bother to stifle.
unfortunately, it didn’t go unnoticed.
“miss l/n,” she snapped, her voice sharp and disapproving. “if my lecture is so boring, perhaps you’d like to teach the class yourself?”
you blinked, caught off guard. “i wasn’t saying it was boring.”
“no, you were implying it,” she shot back, folding her arms. “do you have anything to add to the discussion, or are you content to waste everyone’s time?”
the entire room was watching now and you could feel the weight of their eyes on you. you glanced at minjeong, who was sitting with her arms crossed. she didn’t even bother to look at you.
one thing you hated was the judgment, the way your chest tightened uncomfortably under the pressure.
“i didn’t mean to waste anyone’s time,” you defended, trying to keep your voice steady. “i just yawned. it’s not a crime.”
“it’s disrespectful,” she retorted. “and given your current academic performance, i’d suggest you take this class more seriously.”
that hit a nerve. “oh, so now we’re making it personal?” you asked, your voice rising.
“y/n,” ryujin hissed from the corner of the room, but you ignored her.
“you know what?” you said, standing up and grabbing your bag. “i don’t need this. i don’t need to sit here and listen to someone power trip on their authority.”
“then leave,” she finished coldly. “and don’t come back until you’re ready to behave like an adult.”
“gladly,” you muttered, storming out of the room.
once you were outside, you fumbled with your bag until you found your pack of cigarettes. your hands were trembling as you lit one, the first drag filling your lungs and easing the knot in your chest. you leaned against the wall, closing your eyes as the nicotine worked its magic.
but even with the cigarette in hand, your thoughts drifted back to her. minjeong. her stupid smile, the way her eyes used to soften when she thought no one was looking. you thought about the way she’d laughed at your terrible jokes during those late-night study sessions, her walls crumbling just enough to let you in.
and then you thought about the way she’d torn it all apart. how she’d stood there in the middle of that hallway, looking at you like you were nothing and said she was bored.
the memory made your stomach churn. you felt sick, anxious, like you were coming apart at the seams.
“you’ve got to let her go,” you mumbled to yourself, flicking ash onto the ground. “she’s not coming back.”
the words felt hollow. you’d been telling yourself the same thing for months, and yet here you were — still wearing an “i love my ex” shirt like a complete idiot, still hoping she’d see you and change her mind.
you finished your cigarette, hanging around campus before heading to your administrative law class, your mood dark and heavy. when you walked in, yeji waved you over, patting the seat next to her. you slumped into the chair without a word, ignoring her concerned look.
“you alright?” she asked quietly.
“fine,” you mumbled.
out of curiosity, you glanced over your shoulder and immediately regretted it. minjeong was already sitting a row behind you with aeri, her face calm and composed as always. she didn’t even glance your way, but you could feel her presence like a weight pressing down on your chest.
yeji leaned over, her voice low. “okay, but seriously, what’s up with the shirt? you’re not helping yourself.”
you shrugged. “thought it’d be funny.”
“it’s not,” she said bluntly. “it’s sad.”
you didn’t have the energy to argue. instead, you focused on the desk in front of you, your fingers tracing invisible patterns on the surface. you hadn’t even realised you were trembling until yeji put a hand on your arm.
“hey,” she said softly. “are you okay?”
“i’m failing,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “failing everything. maybe i should just drop out. leave this place and start over somewhere else.”
she frowned. “don’t say that.”
“why not?” you asked, meeting her eyes. “what’s the point? i’m not cut out for this. i’m just wasting everyone’s time — professors, my parents, even yours.”
“that’s not true,” she said firmly. “you’re not wasting my time and you’re definitely not a waste.”
you didn’t respond, staring down at your trembling hands.
“listen,” she continued, her tone softer. “i know it’s a lot. but dropping out isn’t the answer. you just need to take a step back, breathe and figure out what you want.”
“i don’t even know what i want anymore,” you admitted.
from behind you, you felt a pair of eyes on you. minjeong’s. though you didn’t dare turn around, you could feel her frown, her sharp gaze lingering on your hands.
“just…think about it,” she added, giving your arm a reassuring squeeze. “you’ve gotten this far.”
by some miracle — or maybe out of sheer spite, you managed to pull yourself together for the rest of the lecture. instead of zoning out or whispering to yeji, you actually listened. surprisingly, the material clicked this time.
professor diaz, as sharp as ever, began throwing out questions to the class and to everyone’s surprise — including your own — you knew the answers.
“miss l/n,” he called, clearly sceptical after he heard of your earlier outburst. “procedural fairness — tell me, what are its main components?”
you hesitated for a moment, glancing at yeji, who gave you a small, encouraging nod. “uh, well, the two main components are the right to a fair hearing and the rule against bias.”
the professor raised an eyebrow, clearly not expecting you to be correct. “and? tell us more about it.”
“the right to a fair hearing means that anyone affected by a decision should have an opportunity to present their case,” you answered, hesitation still audible in your voice. “the latter will ensure that decision-makers remain impartial and free from any conflicts of interest.”
he paused, then gave a small nod of approval. “not bad, miss l/n. maybe there’s some hope for you after all.”
you felt a flicker of pride at his words, though it was quickly replaced by embarrassment as yeji smirked and whispered, “look at you, being a functional member of society.”
after class ended, you gathered your things and followed her out, ignoring the glances from your classmates. as the two of you walked toward your usual hangout spot, you spotted ryujin and beomgyu already waiting on the stairs that led down to the fountain.
the fountain, of course, was near the gazebo where minjeong and her clique always sat — and judged.
“finally!” ryujin called out as you and yeji approached. “thought you two got lost or something.”
“y/n was busy impressing the professor,” yeji teased, nudging you. “she actually answered questions. correctly, even.”
“whoa,” beomgyu said, putting a hand to his chest like he was in shock. “is this the same y/n we know, or did someone replace her?”
“ha ha,” you said dryly, dropping your bag on the stairs. “you’re hilarious.”
“she’s just trying to make up for the shirt,” ryujin said, nodding toward your chest.
beomgyu squinted at the bold i love my ex print and groaned. “oh, for the love of — y/n, take it off.”
“you take it off,” you shot back, smirking.
“don’t tempt me,” he said, rummaging through his bag. after a moment, he pulled out a plain white t-shirt and tossed it at you. “here; you put this on before you embarrass yourself any further.”
you stared at the shirt for a moment, then sighed. “fine,” you pulled it over your head without argument, covering up the text that seemed to offend everyone.
“there,” he nodded in approval. “now you look like a normal human being.”
meanwhile, at the gazebo, minjeong had been watching the entire exchange. she frowned when she saw you cover up the shirt, though she didn’t know why it bothered her.
aeri, however, noticed immediately.
“jealous much?” aeri teased, smirking as she leaned back against the gazebo railing. “what, you miss being the one she’s obsessed with?”
“don’t be ridiculous,” minjeong’s tone was cool and dismissive. “i don’t care what she wears.”
“sure you don’t,” yizhuo chimed in, grinning. “you’ve been staring at her for the past five minutes.”
she rolled her eyes, pretending to focus on her phone. “you’re imagining things.”
“uh-huh,” aeri said, exchanging a knowing look with yizhuo.
she ignored them, though her eyes flickered back to you just in time to see you grab your skateboard. you and beomgyu were at it again, attempting flips and tricks on the stairs while yeji and ryujin sat nearby, shaking their heads.
“she’s going to hurt herself,” minjeong muttered, though no one seemed to hear her.
and then, as if on cue, it happened. you misjudged your footing on a landing, and the skateboard flew out from under you. you went down hard, hitting the edge of the stairs with a sickening thud.
“shit,” ryujin said, scrambling to her feet as yeji gasped.
from where she sat, minjeong’s heart skipped a beat. before she realised what she was doing, she was already standing up, her eyes locked on your crumpled form at the bottom of the stairs.
“relax,” jimin mumbled, crossing her arms. “your ex can handle it. and dumped her, remember? don’t act like you care now.”
but she didn’t respond. she couldn’t take her eyes off you, her mind racing with worry even as she tried to convince herself that it wasn’t her problem anymore.
“jesus christ, y/n,” beomgyu muttered as he crouched down beside you, pulling his bag off his back and rummaging through it with the urgency of a paramedic. “you’ve really outdone yourself this time. does it hurt? of course it hurts. what a stupid question.”
“it’s fine,” you said through gritted teeth, clutching your ribs as you tried to sit up. the sharp sting that shot through your side made you wince and you slumped back down against the cold stone of the stairs.
“yeah, fine. sure,” he said sarcastically. “you only fell from, what, three metres? you’re totally fine.”
“shut up, gyu,” you snapped, glaring at him.
“oh, don’t worry,” he said, pulling a freezing cold gatorade bottle out of his bag. “i’m about to help you,” without any warning, he pressed the icy bottle directly against your ribs.
you let out a shriek, the pain sharp and immediate. “what the fuck, beomgyu?!”
“what?” he asked innocently, holding the bottle in place. “it’s cold therapy. helps with the swelling.”
“it’s called torture!” you yelled, trying to shove his hand away.
“stop being dramatic,” he said, but he moved the bottle, finally giving you a moment to breathe.
ryujin crouched next to you, her hands on her hips as she stared at you like a disappointed parent. “you’re a fucking idiot, you know that?”
“it wasn’t that bad of a fall,” you muttered, avoiding her gaze.
“you’ve got to stop pulling stunts like this,” she said, shaking her head. “your bones can only take so much abuse before they just give up.”
“and then what?” yeji interjected, crossing her arms as she stared down at you. “you’ll end up in the hospital and we’ll have to explain to the doctors that you’re failing uni because you spend all your time skating and crying over your ex.”
at the mention of her, your stomach twisted. “don’t bring her into this,” you muttered, staring at the ground.
“oh, we’re bringing her into this,” yeji said, crouching down to your level. “because, let’s be honest, half the reason you’re acting like an idiot lately is because of minjeong.”
“shut up,” you mumbled, squeezing your eyes shut.
“she’s right, though,” ryujin added, her tone softer this time. “you’ve been in your head about her since the breakup. it’s messing you up.”
“it’s not about her,” you lied, though the lump in your throat betrayed you. you hated that they were right. hated that even now, with pain radiating through your ribs, your thoughts still drifted to her.
you hated minjeong. or at least, you wanted to. you hated the way she made everything look so easy and you hated the way she walked around like she owned the world, like nothing and no one could touch her.
most of all, you hated the way she looked at you. because even now, even after everything, you swore there was something in her eyes that told you she still cared.
and that, more than anything, made you feel sick.
“y/n?” ryujin’s voice cut through your thoughts, bringing you back to the present. she was staring at you, her brow furrowed in concern. “are you crying?”
“what? no,” you said quickly, wiping at your face. but the tears were there, hot and unwelcome.
“you are,” yeji pointed, her tone softening. “y/n, what’s wrong? is it your ribs?”
“no,” you said, shaking your head. “it’s…it’s just —” your voice cracked, and you groaned, burying your face in your hands. “stupid fucking bitch, why does she have to look so pretty all the time?”
“who?” beomgyu asked, confused.
“minjeong,” yeji said quietly, her expression softening. “she’s talking about minjeong.”
of course you were. even now, when you should have been focusing on your physical pain, she was the only thing on your mind.
“alright, don’t fucking piss me off,” ryujin groaned abruptly, standing up and brushing off her jeans. “we’re skipping the rest of the day.”
“what?” yeji asked, glancing between you and ryujin. “you serious?”
“dead serious,” ryujin answered. “we’re taking her to joe’s juice joint, and we’re drinking her heart out until she forgets minjeong ever existed.”
“now that’s a plan,” beomgyu said, grinning. “i’m in.”
“guys, i’m fine,” you protested weakly, but ryujin wasn’t having it.
“nope,” she said, grabbing your arm and hauling you to your feet. “you’re coming, no arguments. consider this an intervention.”
reluctantly, you let them guide you down the stairs. every step sent a fresh wave of pain through your ribs but you gritted your teeth and kept moving. anything was better than sitting around and wallowing in self-pity.
as you passed by the gazebo, you didn’t spare minjeong or her clique a single glance. but you could feel her eyes on you, heavy and unrelenting, like she was trying to read your mind from across the courtyard.
“y/n!” aeri’s voice rang out from the gazebo, loud and teasing. “anything broken?”
“just my ego,” you mumbled without looking up.
she cackled, clearly delighted. “you skipping class again? what is this, the third time this week?”
“fourth,” ryujin told her with a smirk. “and yeah, we’re heading to joe’s. you want to join us after your class?”
the girl raised an eyebrow, glancing at minjeong, whose frown deepened. “tempting,” she said, still grinning. “might just take you up on that.”
“we’ll be there all night,” ryujin winked, wrapping an arm around your shoulders as if to shield you from the weight of your ex-girlfriend’s gaze.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the first day, it was easy for minjeong to ignore your absence. people skipped class all the time; it wasn’t a big deal. you were probably out skating somewhere or doing something equally idiotic and irresponsible.
she really told herself she didn’t care. she spent the lecture dutifully taking notes, her pen gliding smoothly across the page, her expression calm and collected.
yet as the minutes dragged on, she caught herself glancing at the door more often than she wanted to admit. no loud entrance, no skateboard clattering against the floor, no offhand comment that made half the class groan and the other half laugh. the room felt…off.
too quiet.
“focus,” she muttered under her breath, shaking her head. this was good. peace and quiet was good.
but the uneasy feeling lingered.
the second day was harder.
she arrived to class early as always, settling into her usual seat. she pulled out her notebook and began skimming through her notes, but her focus wavered. every time the door opened, her eyes flickered up instinctively, only to be met with someone else’s face.
not a sight of you.
again?
she hated how much it bothered her. hated the little knot forming in her stomach, the way her pen hovered idly in her hand as she stared at the empty seat you usually occupied. it wasn’t like she cared.
“you alright?” aeri asked during lunch, raising an eyebrow as she leaned across the table. “you’re kind of…off today.”
“i’m fine,” minjeong said curtly, stabbing at her salad with her fork.
“you don’t look fine,” jimin pressed, clearly amused. “what’s got you all grumpy?”
“nothing,” she replied, her tone sharp enough to make them smirk.
“is it because of y/n?” jimin asked, her eyes glinting with mischief. “you’ve been weird since she stopped showing up.”
“i haven’t been weird,” she snapped, glaring at her.
“you totally have,” yizhuo pointed out, leaning back in her chair. “you’ve been frowning nonstop for two days. it’s honestly kind of funny.”
“maybe you should just ask her friends where she is,” jimin suggested casually, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “wouldn’t it put your mind at ease?”
“i don’t care where she is,” minjeong said rather quickly, her voice colder than she intended. “it’s none of my business.”
“sure it’s not,” aeri chuckled, exchanging a knowing look with jimin and yizhuo.
she didn’t dignify them with a response. instead, she stood abruptly, grabbing her bag and walking away. she hated how transparent she was, hated that her friends could see right through her.
but as much as she wanted to pretend she didn’t care, the nagging unease wouldn’t go away. your absence felt like a puzzle piece out of place and she hated unsolved puzzles.
the fountain steps were as loud and chaotic as ever when minjeong approached, her unease simmering just beneath her calm exterior. she spotted your friends easily — beomgyu, ryujin and yeji sitting in their usual spot, laughing about something as he gestured wildly with his hands.
she hesitated for a moment, her pride warring with her curiosity. then, with a deep breath, she walked up to them, her expression carefully neutral.
the first to notice her was beomgyu, who immediately froze mid-gesture. “uh…” he blinked, clearly caught off guard. “can we help you?”
“where’s y/n?” she asked, cutting straight to the point. her tone was as cold as ever, but her fingers tightened around the strap of her bag.
ryujin raised an eyebrow, exchanging a glance with yeji. “why do you care?”
“i don’t,” she replied quickly, though the words felt hollow. “i just noticed she wasn’t in class. that’s all.”
“you noticed,” beomgyu said, leaning back with a grin. “interesting.”
“just answer the question,” she demanded, her patience wearing thin.
ryujin sighed dramatically, leaning forward with a smirk. “well, since you’re so curious…she fainted at joe’s the other day, y’know, when she fell down these stairs.”
minjeong’s calm facade cracked. her eyes widened slightly, her grip tightening on her bag. “she fainted?”
“yeah,” ryujin said, her tone casual but her eyes glinting with amusement. “we were all hanging out, having a good time and then boom — she just collapsed.”
her stomach twisted. “collapsed?” her voice was quieter now, less sharp. “what?”
“yep,” yeji added, nodding solemnly. “we had to take her to the hospital. turns out she fractured a rib when she fell on the stairs.”
the words hit your ex-girlfriend like a punch to the gut. fractured a rib? the image of your fall replayed in her mind, but this time it felt sharper, more vivid. she could still hear the sickening thud of your body hitting the stairs, see the way you’d clutched your side in pain.
and now, knowing you hadn’t just brushed it off, that it was serious enough to land you in hospital, made minjeong’s chest ache in a way she didn’t like.
“so, there you go,” ryujin yawned, tilting her head. “your curiosity satisfied?”
she didn’t respond, choosing to turn on her heel and walk away — her mind racing. she told herself it didn’t matter.
you didn’t matter.
she stared blankly at her phone, her thumb idly scrolling through an endless feed of nothing. the sounds of her friends chatting around her faded into the background and she leaned back against the bench, her thoughts pulling her under.
she didn’t know why she broke up with you that day. no matter how many times she replayed the memory in her head, it never made sense. one moment, you were telling her some absurdly funny story about your boss — a ridiculous tale about how he had a deep-rooted fear of olives and couldn’t even look at a martini without panicking.
she remembered laughing at that, really laughed and it felt easy, like it always did with you. you’d grinned at her, bright and carefree; the kind of smile that felt like it was meant just for her.
and then, almost without thinking, she’d said it.
“i’m bored of you.”
the words had tumbled out of her mouth, cold and sharp, before she even realised what she was doing. she remembered the way your expression had faltered for the briefest of moments, like a flicker of a flame before it was snuffed out.
and then, as if to spite her, you’d smiled. laughed, even.
“cool. no worries,” you’d replied, your tone light and easy, like she hadn’t just ripped the ground out from under you.
but she saw the way your shoulders stiffened as you turned and walked away and for the first time, she had felt the weight of what she’d done.
she’d tried to convince herself it was the right choice. your relationship had been getting…too real.
a year was a long time, longer than she ever thought she’d spend with anyone. and with every passing day, you’d peeled back more and more of her walls, learning things about her that she didn’t even know she wanted to share.
it terrified her how easily you read her, how you’d figured her out like you were studying a map of her soul.
she hated it. hated that you could tell what kind of mood she was in just by the way she tapped her pen during lectures. hated that you knew her coffee order by heart, down to the extra splash of milk she only liked on rainy days. hated that you always noticed when she was struggling, even when she didn’t say a word.
she hated that she’d started to depend on you — because if you knew her so well, if you’d gotten that close, then it meant you had the power to hurt her in a way no one else ever had.
and minjeong didn’t know if she could handle that.
so, she’d broken things off. not gently, not in private, but in the loudest, cruelest way possible. if she made you hate her, if she pushed you far enough away, then maybe she could protect herself.
except you didn’t hate her.
you didn’t yell at her, or cry, or make a scene. you just…kept smiling. kept acting like it didn’t bother you, like you understood her better than she understood herself. and then, to her frustration, you started chasing her. showing up to class wearing ridiculous shirts, making jokes loud enough for her to hear and skating around like you didn’t have a care in the world.
it drove her insane.
it wasn’t fair. she’d ended things because she needed distance, needed to feel in control again, and here you were, acting like you could still get under her skin whenever you wanted.
she clenched her jaw, staring down at her phone. the image of you sitting in the hospital, clutching your ribs and pretending it didn’t hurt, flashed in her mind.
you were so stubborn, so reckless, and it infuriated her that she still cared.
“you okay?” yizhuo’s voice cut through her thoughts, and minjeong looked up, realising she’d been silent for too long.
“fine,” she muttered, but the word felt hollow.
“you don’t look fine,” aeri teased, leaning closer. “what’s got you so worked up? your ex again?”
minjeong’s jaw tightened. she hated how easily her friends could read her, hated that she was so transparent. “no,” she answered sharply.
“uh-huh,” jimin said, smirking. “sure it’s not.”
she ignored them, turning her focus inward again. you needed to stop chasing her, stop showing up with that stupid grin that made her chest ache in ways she didn’t want to think about.
maybe if she made it clear that she’d moved on, you’d finally back off. you were proud, after all — too proud to stick around if you thought she was interested in someone else.
an idea formed in her mind, one she didn’t entirely like but couldn’t shake.
maybe i should be seen with someone else in front of her.
if you saw her laughing with someone else, leaning in close, maybe even touching their arm, you’d get the message.
she exhaled, closing her eyes for a moment. it would hurt you — she knew that.
but wasn’t that the point? if hurting you meant protecting herself, wasn’t it worth it?
minjeong opened her eyes, her decision made. she’ll stop. she has to.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
you were already regretting coming in. every step you took through the halls felt heavier, slower, like the whispers around you were dragging you down. usually, the energy on campus buzzed with something familiar — greetings, smiles and nods of acknowledgment as people called out your name.
today, however, there was a sudden shift. people were staring, their hushed voices following you like shadows.
you weren’t used to this. the stares weren’t friendly; they were curious, cautious, like you were some sort of sideshow spectacle.
your mind raced with questions as the weight of their gazes pressed on you: what the fuck have i done now?
“you should’ve stayed home,” ryujin muttered from beside you, her arms crossed and her pace slowing to match yours. “seriously, what are you even doing here?”
“i have to try,” you mumbled, not meeting her gaze. the ache in your ribs flared with every step, but you forced yourself to keep walking. “if i don’t, i’ll have to repeat. and that’s more embarrassing than walking around like this.”
she sighed, shaking her head. “you’re impossible, you know that?”
you didn’t respond, you couldn’t. the pain was bad enough, but the whispers and the growing pit of anxiety in your stomach made it worse. you tried to focus on getting to class, on anything but the way people seemed to glance at you and then quickly look away.
when you finally reached the lecture hall of your evidence class, yeji was waiting near the entrance, her arms crossed. the moment she saw you, she walked up and grabbed your wrist. “come on.”
“what —” you started, but yeji was already pulling you toward the front of the room, far from your usual spot in the back.
“why are we sitting here?” you frowned, glancing back at ryujin, who followed silently, her expression unreadable.
“just trust me,” yeji mumbled, her tone firm as she steered you into a seat in the front row. “you’ll thank me later.”
heaving out a sigh, you didn’t argue. your ribs throbbed as you sank into the chair and you focused on pulling out your notebook and pen, determined to make it through the lecture. you began to scribble notes as it began, your mind too foggy with pain to think about anything else.
direct. circumstantial. hearsay.
until your pen slipped out of your fingers and clattered to the floor behind you.
groaning in pain, you turned slowly, twisting just enough to grab it. when you looked up, the sight in the back of the room hit you harder than the fall that fractured your rib.
minjeong was sitting next to sungchan. not just sitting — close. too close. her body angled toward him, her arm resting on the desk between them, the space so small it might as well not have fucking existed. his stupid smile stretched across his face as he leaned toward her, saying something that made her chuckle softly.
the only thing rooted in place was disbelief as your breath caught in your throat. your fingers froze around the pen. it wasn’t just that they were sitting together; it was the way they looked. comfortable. familiar. like this wasn’t the first time.
what the fuck?
ryujin noticed the change in your expression immediately. “y/n?” she whispered, nudging your arm gently. “hey, you good?”
but you weren’t good. you were anything but good. the pain in your ribs was nothing compared to the ache that spread through your chest like wildfire.
your gaze flickered back to the front, but it was too late. the damage was done. the rest of the lecture passed in a haze, your pen barely moving across the page. you couldn’t focus, all you could see was minjeong and sungchan, sitting together like they belonged there, like she hadn’t asked about you just days ago.
so this is what she wanted, you thought bitterly, your jaw clenched so tight it ached.
some time alone so sungchan could sweep her off her feet?
you thought she cared. you really thought that despite her cold front towards you, that there was still something there, but apparently, you’d been wrong.
she didn’t even glance your way. not once. she stayed glued to him the entire lecture, her quiet laughter ringing faintly in your ears like a cruel reminder.
when the class ended, you packed your things in silence, your hands trembling slightly as you stuffed your notebook into your bag. you didn’t say a word to ryujin or yeji as you walked out, the hollow ache in your chest growing with every step.
she doesn’t care, you told yourself. she never did.
the thought didn’t stop the sting.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the walk to your next class was excruciatingly quiet. too quiet. beomgyu was by your side, matching your pace as the two of you moved through the crowded hallway, but he didn’t say much.
for once, the usual chatter and easy jokes he always carried with him were absent, lips pressed into a thin line, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his hoodie — like he was trying to make himself invisible.
he’d noticed, of course. he always did. you’d seen minjeong and sungchan together in the last lecture and it had sucked the life out of you. he’d seen the way your expression had darkened, the fire in your eyes replaced with something duller; something he didn’t like.
you were a ticking time bomb. and he was scared.
“you okay?” he asked finally, his voice hesitant.
you nodded, your eyes focused on the floor ahead of you. “fine.”
he didn’t believe you, not for a second, but he didn’t push. instead, he tried to fill the silence with small talk, his usual coping mechanism.
“so,” he said, forcing a grin. “how’s the rib? still feel like your entire torso’s on fire, or is it more of a dull, stabbing pain now?”
normally, you’d have some kind of snarky remark for him, a sarcastic jab or a playful insult. but now, you just shrugged, your shoulders heavy with the weight of everything unsaid.
beomgyu fell silent. it was rare for him to feel uncomfortable, but something about this version of you — quiet, almost lifeless, set him on edge.
the two of you walked into your tutorial room and took your seats. at least minjeong wasn’t here, but sungchan was. and even worse, he was sitting just a few rows behind you, loud enough for you to hear every word he was saying.
“yeah, man, she’s amazing,” sungchan was saying to one of his friends, his voice carrying across the room like nails on a chalkboard. “she’s smart, funny, gorgeous…i mean, i’m going to make her mine.”
your grip tightened around your pen.
“like, she’s not even cold, you know?” he continued, his tone insistent, as if he were the authority on minjeong’s personality. “she’s just…selective. she doesn’t waste her time on people who don’t deserve her.”
every word he said felt like a dagger, twisting deeper and deeper. he spoke about minjeong like he knew her, like he truly understood her and it made your stomach churn.
he doesn’t know her. he doesn’t.
then again, maybe he was right. maybe you didn’t deserve her. maybe you never had.
the tutorial on property law dragged on, every second stretching into an eternity. when it finally ended, you were the last to pack up, moving sluggishly as the room emptied around you. beomgyu hovered nearby, watching you like you might break at any moment.
“y/n,” professor anderson’s voice pulled you from your thoughts and you looked up to see professor anderson, her warm brown eyes filled with concern.
she was one of the few professors who actually seemed to care about her students, and she’d always had a soft spot for you, even if you were a pain in her class sometimes.
“yes, professor?” you asked, your voice quieter than usual.
she crossed her arms, leaning against her desk as she studied you. “you need to pull it together,” she said, her tone gentle but firm. “i don’t know what’s going on with you, but whatever it is, you need to let it go. focus on yourself, not on…other distractions.”
you knew exactly what she meant, but you didn’t argue. instead, you nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. “i understand,” you said quietly. “thank you, professor.”
“you’re capable, y/n,” she added, her voice softening. “more than you realise. don’t waste that.”
you nodded again, murmuring a quiet “i’ll try” before walking out of the room.
beomgyu followed silently, his usual teasing absent as he guided you toward the stairs where your friends always hung out.
as you approached, your eyes drifted to the gazebo. there they were — minjeong, sungchan and the rest of her friends. he was sitting exactly where you used to sit sometimes, his arm casually draped along the back of the bench, leaning into her like he belonged there.
you looked away quickly, but the image was burned into your mind.
“don’t do anything stupid,” yeji started as you reached the stairs, her voice cutting through the haze in your mind. “seriously, y/n. you’ve already hurt yourself enough. don’t make it worse.”
“she’s right,” beomgyu added, sitting beside you. “minjeong’s made her feelings pretty clear, hasn’t she? maybe it’s time to…you know, let it go.”
you sat there for a moment, staring down at your hands. their words were harsh, but they weren’t wrong. she really had made it clear. over and over again, she’d shown you exactly where you stood in her life.
“okay,” you finally said, your voice barely above a whisper.
yeji frowned. “okay?”
you exhaled, the weight of the past year pressing down on you like a tidal wave. “i give up on her.”
the silence that followed was heavy, but for the first time in what felt like forever, you didn’t feel like you were drowning.
“it’s about time,” ryujin cut through the silence, her voice lacking its usual teasing edge.
beomgyu clapped a hand on your shoulder, his grin tentative but hopeful. “you’re gonna be okay, y/n.”
you nodded, your gaze drifting back to the gazebo for a moment before turning away. it still hurt, but maybe, just maybe, you were ready to start moving on.
but those words had barely left your mouth when the weight of everything hit you all at once. you thought saying it aloud would feel like some kind of release, a burden lifted.
instead, it was like the air had been sucked out of your lungs. the edges of your vision blurred as your chest tightened, your heart pounding so hard it drowned out everything around you.
you couldn’t breathe.
“y/n?” yeji’s voice came from somewhere far away, muffled and distant. “are you okay?”
your hands were trembling, your fingers curling into fists as you struggled to pull in air. your body felt too heavy, your chest heaving as you fought against the invisible weight pressing down on you.
“shit,” ryujin said, her voice sharp with alarm. “she’s having a panic attack.”
your ribs ached with every shallow breath, the pain only amplifying the sense of suffocation.
“y/n, look at me,” beomgyu called out calmly, crouching in front of you. his voice was steadier than the others, but you could hear the undercurrent of worry. “hey, it’s okay. you’re okay. just breathe, yeah? in through your nose, out through your mouth.”
the panic clawed at your chest, your mind spiralling as thoughts of minjeong, sungchan and everything else crashed over you like a wave.
ryujin grabbed your trembling hands, her grip firm but not forceful. “count with me,” she said, her voice low and steady. “one… two…three…”
the breaths came in short, rapid bursts, your body fighting against you as the world narrowed down to the sound of ryujin’s counting and beomgyu and yeji’s soft reassurances.
slowly, the edges of your vision began to clear, and the tightness in your chest eased just enough for you to take a deeper breath.
“that’s it,” beomgyu said, his voice filled with relief. “you’re doing great, y/n. keep going.”
it took a few more minutes, but eventually, the panic subsided. your breaths came slower, deeper, though your chest still ached from the effort.
“you scared the hell out of us,” ryujin said softly, her hands still holding yours.
“sorry,” you managed to whisper, your voice hoarse.
“don’t apologise,” yeji said firmly. “just…god, y/n. you’ve been holding everything in for so long. you haven’t had one of those in awhile.”
the truth was, you weren’t okay. you hadn’t been for a long time, and today had pushed you past your breaking point.
“we’re taking you home,” beomgyu decided, standing up and offering you his hand. “no arguments.”
“what about your other lectures?” you asked, though the question came out half-heartedly. “i can go home by myself, i’ve gone to all of mine.”
“it can wait,” ryujin reassured, helping you to your feet. “you need to rest.”
as the three of them guided you away from the stairs, your eyes flickered back to the gazebo. she was still there, her laugh carrying faintly on the breeze as sungchan said something that made her smile.
she didn’t even notice — or at least, pretended not to.
it hurt, but for the first time, you let yourself turn away. maybe you didn’t know how to move on yet, but you knew you couldn’t keep doing this to yourself.
one step at a time, you’d figure it out eventually.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the past few days had been a blur of quiet determination. for once, you focused on your lectures, actually paying attention and, to your own surprise, getting the answers right. the professors had started to notice the shift, exchanging glances whenever you raised your hand or turned in a completed assignment.
even your friends had been treading lightly around you, unsure of what to make of the sudden change.
your skateboard hadn’t seen the light of day in a week, and your fractured rib was a constant, painful reminder to take things slow. the ache kept you grounded, pulling you out of your thoughts whenever they strayed too far toward the past — or toward her.
you told yourself you were doing better. and maybe you were.
but then came criminal law and your tutorial; the one you dreaded the most and gotten into trouble for. the memory of that confrontation still made you cringe, but you were determined to avoid any repeat incidents today.
when professor cho announced that you’d be pairing up for an activity, your stomach dropped. random pairings. your gut churning. there were over fifty people in this class. surely your odds weren’t that bad. surely the universe wouldn’t —
“l/n and kim,” she announced and you felt your heart sink into your stomach.
there was no point protesting. she didn’t entertain negotiations when it came to her pairing system.
you didn’t look at her as you packed up your things and moved to sit beside her. minjeong was already there, her posture as perfect and poised as ever, her notebook open and a pen twirling idly between her fingers.
she glanced at you as you sat down, but you kept your eyes on your notes.
“so,” she began, her voice low and cautious. “let’s —”
“yes, let’s just get this over with,” you interrupted, your tone curt as you flipped through your notes. “assuming we both know the answers, this shouldn’t take long.”
she blinked, taken aback. she wasn’t used to this. wasn’t used to you being cold, distant. it was disarming, and for a moment, she didn’t know how to respond.
“how’s your rib?” she asked after a minute of silence, her voice quieter.
“fine,” you said shortly, not looking up and you rammed through your lecture notes.
she frowned, her eyes flickering to your hands. your fingers were trembling slightly, just enough to be noticeable if someone was paying attention.
she was paying attention.
“are you sure —“
“can we focus on the activity, please?” you cut her off, your tone sharper now. “i don’t want to waste time.”
the task was straightforward: analyse the implications of marbury v. madison on the separation of powers and judicial authority. a list of guiding questions were already provided.
her jaw tightened, but she didn’t push further. the two of you worked through the questions in near silence, your answers quick and precise, leaving no room for small talk. every time she tried to make a comment or ask something unrelated, you shut her down with a clipped response.
“okay, yeah, how did chief justice marshall justify the court’s authority to strike down laws?” minjeong asked, her tone professional, detached.
“his argument was that it was inherent in the role of the judiciary to interpret the constitution,” you replied flatly, not meeting her eyes. “and that any law conflicting with the constitution was void.”
she nodded, writing down your response. her attempt at making small comments, asking for your opinion on certain nuances of the case were shut down with brief, matter-of-fact answers.
aeri, sitting a few seats away, was clearly enjoying the show. she leaned back in her chair, smirking as she whispered something to jimin, who chuckled quietly.
minjeong cleared her throat, watching you write her answers down. “any plans for the weekend?”
you stopped writing, eyebrows furrowed as you looked up at her. “seriously?”
when you brushed off another one of her attempts at conversation, aeri let out a low laugh that carried just enough for you both to hear. “looks like someone’s getting a taste of their own medicine.”
minjeong shot her a glare but didn’t say anything. she turned back to you, watching as you scribbled the last answer onto your notes with an almost mechanical efficiency.
“we’re done,” you said flatly, closing your notebook. you didn’t even look at her as you packed up your things, already half-turned away.
“wait,” minjeong said, her voice firmer this time.
you paused, your jaw clenching as you slowly turned back to face her. “what now?”
“what’s your problem?” she asked, her brows furrowed in frustration. “why are you acting like this?”
you stared at her, disbelief flashing across your face. “why do you care?”
“i don’t,” she said quickly, though the slight waver in her voice betrayed her. “i just think we should be civil. we have to share classes, and —”
“civil?” you repeated, a bitter laugh escaping your lips. “you want to be civil? fine. here’s me being civil: i don’t want anything to do with you. so why don’t you go bother your boyfriend instead?”
her eyes widened, stunned into silence for a moment. “boyfriend?”
“sungchan,” you said, spitting his name like it was poison. “you know, the guy who’s been practically glued to your side?”
her mouth opened, but no words came out. she didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to explain that sungchan wasn’t anything to her, that she didn’t even like him like that.
yet, the way you were looking at her — hurt and angry and tired — made her chest ache in a way she shouldn’t ignore.
“just leave me alone, minjeong,” you said, your voice quieter now but no less firm. “you’ve already made it clear how little i mean to you.”
and with that, you turned and walked away, leaving her sitting there, her thoughts a tangled mess of regret and confusion.
aeri, who’d been watching the whole exchange, let out a low whistle. “damn, winter. you really fucked this one up.”
she didn’t respond. she just sat there, staring at the spot where you’d been, her hands clenched into fists as she tried to make sense of the hollow feeling in her chest.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the sheer audacity of minjeong to ask you what was wrong after everything. it wasn’t just the question itself; it was the nerve of her, acting as if she cared when she clearly didn’t.
you couldn’t shake the anger. no matter how many hours passed, no matter how much you tried to focus on anything else, it kept bubbling up, simmering just beneath the surface.
“can you believe her?” you said, gesturing wildly as ryujin, yeji and beomgyu listened, clearly trying not to laugh. “what’s your problem? she has the nerve to ask me that, like she doesn’t know exactly what my problem is!”
“to be fair,” ryujin sighed, leaning back on her elbows. “you didn’t exactly give her much to work with.”
“yeah, well, she didn’t deserve anything from me,” you shot back, crossing your arms. “if she wanted me to talk, maybe she should’ve thought about that before…ugh, before being her stupid idiot self.”
beomgyu snorted. “solid argument, y/n. very lawyer-like.”
you rolled your eyes, but it only made you more animated. “and the worst part? she keeps pretending like she wants to be civil. civil! like we’re strangers passing in the hall. how does she expect me to just…just—” you waved your hands in frustration, “pretend nothing ever happened?”
“you’re really letting this eat at you,” yeji snorted, glancing toward the gazebo. “but hey, at least sungchan isn’t around today. small mercies, right?”
you stopped for a second at her words, if you’d had to see him sitting there next to minjeong again, smiling like he’d already won, you might have actually lost your sanity.
“yeah,” you muttered. “thank god for that.”
“so,” beomgyu said, smirking, “when are we moving on to the part where you stop caring?”
“don’t hold your breath,” ryujin quipped, earning a laugh from yeji.
you were mid-rant again, mocking minjeong’s indifferent expression and her painfully polite tone, when someone tapped your shoulder lightly.
startled, you turned around, expecting one of your friends, or worse, another professor.
instead, it was danielle marsh — one of the girls who shamefully, on your part, tutored you occasionally.
“hey,” she said softly, her warm smile immediately catching you off guard. she was carrying a tray with coffee cups and a few neatly wrapped sandwiches.
“danielle?” you said, blinking in surprise. she was a year below you, someone you didn’t know very well aside from occasional nods in the hall. “uh, hi?”
“i, um, saw you hurt your rib the other day,” she stammered, holding out the sandwiches for you. “so, minji and i made this for you this morning. figured you might need it.”
for a second, you just stared at her, completely thrown. “you made this for me?”
“yeah,” she said, looking a little shy now. “well, for all of you, really.” she glanced at your friends, smiling. “thought you could all use a pick-me-up.”
your friends didn’t hesitate to take the offered sandwiches and coffee, immediately diving into grateful thank-yous.
“seriously, danielle,” you said, standing up and pulling her into a gentle hug, careful not to press on your rib. “you didn’t have to do this.”
“it’s nothing,” she laughed softly as she hugged you back. “i just hope you feel better soon, yeah?”
“thanks,” you said, pulling away and meeting her kind eyes. “really, thank you. this means a lot.”
she waved it off with a bright smile. “anytime,” and with that, she walked off, leaving you and your friends with her thoughtful gesture.
the moment she was out of earshot, your friends pounced.
“well,” ryujin drawled, raising an eyebrow. “that was adorable.”
“and unexpected,” yeji added, already unwrapping her sandwich. “she made this for you? i mean, for all of us, sure, but for you?”
“you’re getting girls faster than we thought,” beomgyu teased, grinning. “maybe danielle’s your new start? or minji?”
you groaned, but their teasing was infectious, and for the first time in days, you found yourself laughing. “fuck off you all.”
“just saying,” ryujin shot back, smirking. “if this is what moving on looks like, i’m here for it.”
meanwhile, from the gazebo, minjeong watched the entire interaction. she’d seen danielle approach you, watched as she handed you coffee and sandwiches, her smile soft and genuine. she saw the way you hugged her, your expression lighter than it had been all week.
she hated how it made her feel.
yizhuo, sitting beside her, noticed immediately. “jealous?” she asked, her tone teasing.
“no,” minjeong denied, her voice sharper than she intended.
“uh-huh,” the younger girl smirked. “sure you’re not.”
she didn’t want to admit it — not even to herself, but the gnawing feeling in her chest was unmistakable.
it was jealousy, plain and simple. and it had started the moment she saw danielle hand you those coffees and sandwiches, her smile bright and genuine as she looked at you like you were the only person in the world.
it wasn’t fair. you weren’t supposed to move on so quickly. not when minjeong had spent months convincing herself she didn’t care anymore, that you were just a chapter of her life she’d already closed. but watching someone else care for you made her stomach twist in ways she didn’t like.
“so,” jimin began, her tone casual but laced with curiosity as she leaned against the gazebo railing. “danielle, huh?”
minjeong stiffened. “what about her?”
“oh, nothing,” she laughed, clearly enjoying herself. “just that she’s kind of adorable. and from what i’ve heard, she’s, like, the nicest person ever. super smart, super talented. makes sense she’d go for y/n, honestly.”
“she is not going for y/n,” minjeong snapped.
aeri raised her eyebrows. “hmm, interesting reaction.”
“oh, please,” yizhuo chuckled as she looked up from her phone. “you’re jealous, aren’t you?”
“i’m not jealous,” she insisted, but her voice lacked conviction.
aeri leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees as her smile faded slightly. “minjeong, if you’re just going to play with y/n’s feelings, leave her alone. seriously. she’s trying to move on and you need to let her.”
“i’m not playing with her feelings,” she protested, though the guilt was already clawing at her.
jimin scoffed, crossing her arms. “really? because the way you dumped her in front of everyone was pretty brutal. honestly, you’re lucky she didn’t punch you in the face.”
“she didn’t because she’s too nice for her own good,” yizhuo chimed in, her smirk widening. “but honestly, if she did, i’d have cheered her on — we liked y/n.”
minjeong clenched her jaw, her gaze dropping to the table. she didn’t need the reminder of how badly she’d handled things. she knew she’d been cruel and pushed you away in the worst possible way, all because she was scared.
“look,” jimin softened her tone. “you’re allowed to feel whatever you’re feeling, but don’t mess with y/n. she doesn’t deserve that — she chased you for a long time.”
before she could even respond, a loud, overly cheerful voice interrupted them.
“minjeong!”
she turned to see sungchan bounding toward them, a bouquet of brightly coloured flowers in hand.
her friends groaned in unison and jimin buried her face in her hands. “fuck’s sake, can you get rid of that cretin already? we let him sit here, once. and nothing more.”
“what now?” aeri muttered, glaring at the boy as he stopped in front of them, his grin blinding.
“i brought you these,” he said, holding out the flowers with a flourish. “thought they might brighten your day.”
minjeong blinked, completely caught off guard. “uh…”
“sungchan,” jimin interrupted, her voice dripping with annoyance, “we’re kind of in the middle of something. can you not?”
“yeah,” aeri added, ushering for him to leave. “serious conversation happening here. come back later. or maybe never.”
he frowned, clearly disappointed, but he turned to minjeong anyway. “wait, so…can i still come over tonight?”
right on time as you walked past the gazebo, your bag slung over your shoulder, steps faltering for a split second, your head turning just enough to catch sight of the flowers in sungchan’s hand and the hopeful look on his face.
your expression darkened, your brows furrowing as you looked away quickly and kept walking. but she saw it — the flash of hurt that crossed your face, so brief she might have missed it if she hadn’t been watching you so closely.
her chest tightened, guilt mixing with panic. without thinking, she stood up abruptly, ignoring her friends’ surprised looks.
“wait,” she called after you, her voice louder than she intended. “y/n!”
she caught up to you in a few quick strides, falling into step beside you as you kept walking.
then, you stopped abruptly, refusing to face her. “what do you want?” you asked, your tone flat and cold.
“i just…” she hesitated, struggling to find the right words as she turned towards you. “it’s not what it looked like.”
your expression was a mixture of anger and exhaustion, your eyes narrowing slightly. “what are you talking about?”
“sungchan,” she said quickly. “he’s not — i didn’t…he’s not coming over tonight. or any night. he’s not my boyfriend.”
“why do you think i care?” your voice cut through the air like a blade.
minjeong flinched, her chest tightening. she wanted to explain, to say something that would make this easier, but nothing came out. she hated the way your walls were so firmly in place now, blocking her out completely.
“you don’t have to explain yourself to me, minjeong,” you said, your voice softer now but no less firm. “we’re nothing to each other anymore. remember?”
you didn’t wait for her to respond. you turned and walked away, leaving her standing there, her heart pounding and her thoughts a tangled mess of longing.
from the gazebo, jimin let out a low sigh, shaking her head as she watched the scene unfold. “she’s really not handling this well, is she?”
“nope,” aeri sighed. “but it’s fun to watch.”
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
a few days later, you were back in routine; or at least, you were trying to be. the faint ache in your ribs had dulled to something manageable and you’d thrown yourself into lectures and tutorials with a determination that surprised even you.
your professors had started making comments, subtle acknowledgments of your sudden focus and improvement but none of it felt particularly satisfying.
then the rumour started.
“did you hear?” ryujin’s voice broke through the usual buzz of the courtyard as she dropped her bag on the stairs next to you. yeji and beomgyu followed close behind, their expressions a mix of concern and hesitation.
“hear what?” you asked, not looking up from your notebook. you were halfway through an analysis of some case law, trying to keep your mind occupied.
“about minjeong,” ryujin said, her tone careful, like she was stepping on eggshells. “we want you to hear it from us.”
your hand froze mid-sentence. “what about her?”
“uh…” yeji exchanged a glance with beomgyu, who grimaced and shoved his hands in his pockets. “apparently, she said yes to sungchan.”
the pen slipped from your fingers, clattering onto the page. for a moment, you just stared at it, your mind blank. then you picked it up and calmly closed your notebook.
“oh,” you said, your voice eerily even. “good for her.”
ryujin raised an eyebrow. “you okay?”
“yep,” you stuffed your notebook into your bag and stood up, slinging it over your shoulder. “why wouldn’t i be?”
“oh, i don’t know,” beomgyu said, crossing his arms. “maybe because the girl you’ve been in love with for, like, two years just said yes to a guy who literally makes his hair gel do all the work.”
“beomgyu,” yeji hissed, elbowing him in the side.
“what? i’m just saying,” he muttered, but he backed off when ryujin shot him a warning look.
“it’s okay to feel defeated, you know,” ryujin said, her voice gentler now. “angry, even. god knows you tried your best to win her back.”
you sighed, pressing your fingers to your temples. “look, i’m fine. it’s whatever. she can date whoever she wants. i don’t care.”
“okay,” they were clearly unconvinced.
but you didn’t respond. instead, you turned and walked away, leaving your friends watching after you with varying degrees of concern. you didn’t go to your classes that day.
instead, you found yourself in the library, tucked away in a quiet corner with a stack of books and your notes spread out in front of you. studying was easier than thinking about stupid rumours.
meanwhile, across campus, minjeong was sitting with her friends at the gazebo when yizhuo casually dropped the bomb.
“so, when were you going to tell us?” she asked, leaning back in her chair with a sly grin.
“tell you what now?” minjeong asked, frowning.
“about you and sungchan,” she answered, raising an eyebrow. “i heard you said yes to being his girlfriend.”
she froze in her spot, quick to turn her head. “what now?”
“oh, come on,” aeri rolled her eyes. “everyone’s talking about it. apparently, sungchan told some of his friends and now it’s all over campus.”
“that’s not true, i’ll fucking punch him,” she said quickly, her voice rising slightly. “i didn’t say yes to him. i didn’t even —” she groaned, burying her face in her hands. “this is getting out of hand.”
jimin raised an eyebrow as she crossed her legs, reapplying her lipstick. “so you’re not dating him?”
“no!” minjeong exasperated. “of course not.”
“well, you might want to clear that up,” yizhuo giggled. “because your rumoured boyfriend is basking in the glory right now.”
“ugh,” she muttered, standing up abruptly. “this is so stupid.”
“where are you going?” aeri called after her.
“to fix this,” minjeong yelled over her shoulder, already walking away.
as she made her way across campus, her thoughts weren’t on sungchan or the rumour. they were on you. if the rumour had reached her, it had definitely reached you.
and she didn’t like the idea of you believing it for even a second.
it didn’t take long to find you. the library was one of the few places on campus where you could completely disappear these days, and sure enough, there you were, hunched over a pile of books in a quiet corner.
minjeong hesitated for a moment, watching you from a distance. your head was bent over your notes, your brows furrowed in concentration, but even from here, she could see the tension in your shoulders, the way your pen moved too quickly, like you were trying to outrun your thoughts.
“y/n,” she said softly as she approached.
you didn’t look up. “what do you want, minjeong?”
“i need to talk to you,” she muttered, pulling out the chair across from you and sitting down before you could protest.
“i’m busy,” your voice cold as you flipped a page in your notebook.
“it’s about what’s being said about me,” she began quickly, leaning forward. “the one about sungchan.”
that made you pause. your pen hovered over the page, but you didn’t look at her. “what about it?”
“it’s not true,” she tried to reassure you. “i didn’t say yes to him — i barely fucking know him.”
you finally looked up, your eyes meeting hers with a mixture of disbelief and frustration. “why are you telling me this?”
“because i don’t want you to think —” she stopped, her words catching in her throat. “i don’t want you to get the wrong idea.”
“minjeong,” you sighed, your tone tired, “you broke up with me. in front of everyone. you don’t owe me explanations about your love life.”
“i know,” she mumbled. “but i wanted to tell you anyway.”
you stared at her for a moment, your expression unreadable, before shaking your head and turning back to your notes. “thanks for the clarification. now, if you’ll excuse me, i have actual work to do.”
“okay.”
you frowned, shaking your head. “okay?”
minjeong hesitated, her chest tightening as she watched you retreat further behind your wall, but she didn’t know what else to say.
so she stood up, her hands clenched at her sides and walked away, leaving you alone in the quiet hum of the library.
she had made it halfway back to the gazebo when her steps faltered. the way she replayed your cold, clipped tone in her head bothered her.
she told herself to keep walking, to let it go. you clearly wanted nothing to do with her and it was too late for her to fix anything, but the thought of leaving things like this didn’t sit right with her.
“fuck it,” minjeong muttered under her breath, turning on her heel. she was already moving before she could second-guess herself.
the library was quieter than before when she slipped back inside. she spotted you almost immediately, still in the same spot, hunched over your notebook with a pen in hand. the tension in your posture hadn’t eased, and your lips were pressed into a thin line as you stared down at the pages in front of you.
she didn’t think. she walked straight to your table, stopping just short of your line of sight. her hands balled into fists at her sides, but her voice was calm when she spoke.
“what are you studying for?”
you froze for a moment before lifting your head slowly, your eyes narrowing as they met hers. “why are you back?”
“i’m curious,” she said, her voice steady as she gestured to the pile of books and notes on your desk. “what are you working on?”
you stared at her for a moment longer, clearly debating whether or not to engage. finally, with a sigh, you relented. “contracts,” you muttered, flipping through a set of messy notes. “specifically offer and acceptance. and it doesn’t make sense. i don’t get it.”
her lips quirked upward, just slightly, and before you could protest, she pulled out the chair across from you and sat down.
“show me what you’ve got,” she said, leaning forward and pulling one of your books toward her.
“minjeong, don’t,” you warned, but there wasn’t much heat in your voice. “it’s embarrassing enough that danielle, who’s a year below me, had to explain half of this stuff to me the other day. i don’t need my ex-girlfriend doing the same.”
“so?” she hummed, her voice calm in that matter-of-fact tone of hers. “i know you, she doesn’t.”
her words caught you off guard, leaving you momentarily speechless. before you could form a rebuttal, she was already flipping through your notes, scanning the pages with a practiced eye.
“okay,” she began, her tone shifting into something softer, more focused. “let’s start with offer and acceptance. it’s the foundation of any valid contract, right?”
you nodded hesitantly.
“an offer is essentially a promise or commitment to do something, or refrain from doing something that’s communicated to another party,” she explained. “acceptance, on the other hand, is the agreement to the terms of that offer. it has to be clear and communicated back to the person who made the offer.”
you watched as she grabbed a blank sheet of paper and began sketching out a quick diagram, breaking the concept into manageable chunks. “think of it like this: aeri makes an offer to jimin. for it to become a binding contract, jimin has to accept it. if she doesn’t, there’s no agreement.”
“as if jimin would ever accept anything, but go on,” you frowned, glancing at your notes. “what about when an acceptance comes with conditions? like, if jimin says ‘yes, but only if you deliver by friday.’ doesn’t that count as acceptance?”
“good question,” minjeong said, nodding. “that’s actually a counteroffer, not acceptance. a counteroffer effectively rejects the original offer and replaces it with a new one. the original offer is no longer valid unless aeri agrees to the new terms.”
you blinked, processing her words. for the first time all day, the tangled mess of legal jargon in your head started to untangle itself.
“okay, but what about silence?” you asked, leaning forward slightly despite yourself. “like, if aeri threatens jimin with, ‘if you don’t respond, i’ll take that as acceptance.’ does that count?”
“generally, no,” she explained, almost laughing at your example. “silence isn’t considered acceptance. there are exceptions, though, like if there’s a prior relationship between the parties where silence has been treated as acceptance before but that’s pretty rare.”
you let out a low sigh, leaning back in your chair. “this is so annoying.”
“you’re doing fine,” she smiled, her tone reassuring as she slid the diagram she’d drawn across the table. “you’re overthinking it. contracts are just logic in disguise.”
“logic,” you repeated, rolling your eyes. “right. it’s totally logical to write 50 pages on whether saying ‘maybe’ counts as acceptance.”
minjeong chuckled softly and the sound caught you off guard. it was the first time in a long while that she didn’t sound distant or guarded.
“okay, fair,” she kept the smile on her face. “but you’re getting there. it’s not as bad as you think.”
you glanced down at the diagram she’d drawn, the pieces clicking into place in your mind. reluctantly, you muttered, “thanks.”
“anytime,” she answered, her voice soft.
the two of you sat in silence for a moment, the tension between you easing just slightly. but then you shook your head, a faint scowl tugging at your lips. “still doesn’t change the fact that this is humiliating.”
“why?” she asked, tilting her head.
“because you’re my ex,” you said bluntly. “this is next-level embarrassing.”
minjeong shrugged, her expression calm. “i don’t see why it’s a big deal. i’ve seen worst. plus, we’ve been through this before.”
her words lingered in the air, heavier than you expected. for a moment, you didn’t know how to respond, so you said nothing.
instead, you turned your attention back to the notes in front of you, your chest tightening with something you didn’t want to name.
she, however, didn’t press further. she stayed, patiently guiding you through the material until the frustration in your eyes gave way to understanding.
the library was much quieter now, with most of the tables empty and the hum of whispers and shuffling papers reduced to a faint background noise. as you packed up your things, minjeong stood by the door, waiting silently. the awkwardness between you had lessened, but it wasn’t entirely gone.
after all, she was still minjeong; cold, poised, and impossible to read — and you were still you, guarded and hesitant.
you slung your bag over your shoulder as you approached her. “thanks for the help,”
“you’re welcome,” she replied, her tone equally quiet.
the two of you stepped out into the hall together, the silence between you not entirely uncomfortable, but not warm either.
and then, as if the universe had decided to throw yet another curveball your way, you spotted danielle walking toward you, her usual bright smile lighting up her face.
“y/n!” she called out, waving as she quickened her pace.
you stopped, your heart sinking slightly and it was not out of dread, but because you could already feel the tension radiating off minjeong beside you.
still, you smiled at danielle, grateful for her kindness. “hey, what’s up?”
“oh, nothing much,” she said, adjusting the strap of her backpack. “just wanted to see if you’re free after school. thought we could have another study session. you know, go over those case studies from contracts? i think i’ve got some good notes that might help.”
for a moment, your mind flickered back to the days when minjeong used to tutor you. the late nights in quiet study rooms, the way her calm explanations had made everything click.
it was hard not to draw parallels, but you quickly pushed the thought aside.
“yeah, sure,” you said with a nod. “that sounds good.”
danielle beamed and then her eyes shifted to minjeong, who had been standing silently beside you the entire time. her smile faltered slightly as she tilted her head. “oh, hi. i don’t think we’ve met.”
you hesitated for a split second before gesturing between them. “danielle, this is minjeong. minjeong, danielle.”
“hi!” danielle said brightly, extending a hand. “nice to meet you.”
she glanced at her hand briefly before giving it a polite shake, her expression cool and detached. “likewise.”
danielle didn’t seem fazed by her tone, her smile unwavering. “so, are you two friends?”
you opened your mouth to answer, but minjeong spoke first. “we’re classmates.”
her voice was so flat, so devoid of emotion, that it left no room for interpretation. danielle nodded, glancing at you as if to say, well, that was awkward.
“anyway,” she continued, turning back to you, “i’ll text you the details for later, okay?”
“sounds good,” you said, offering her a small smile. “thanks, danielle.”
“no problem,” she grinned. “see you later!”
with that, she waved and walked off, leaving you alone with minjeong once again. the silence that followed was heavier than before and when you turned to look at her, her expression was unreadable.
“what?” you asked, frowning slightly.
she didn’t respond immediately. her eyes lingered on the spot where danielle had been, her thoughts racing. she thought about the way the other girl had smiled at you, her kindness so effortless and genuine.
she thought about the way you’d smiled back, softer than you ever smiled at her these days.
and then, minjeong thought about herself; her coldness, her inability to open up, the walls she’d built so high that even you, someone who had once been so close, had struggled to climb them.
she thought about the way she’d hurt you, the way she pushed you away and how she kept coming back, unable to let go but unwilling to fully stay.
you deserve better.
the realisation hit her with a clarity she couldn’t ignore. you deserved someone who could match your warmth and meet you halfway without hesitation.
someone who didn’t leave you questioning your worth or your place in their life.
and minjeong knew, deep down, that she wasn’t that person.
“nothing,” she said finally, her voice quiet. “i’ll see you around, y/n.”
before you could respond, she turned and walked away, her steps brisk and purposeful.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the moment minjeong walked away, you brushed off the strange interaction as just another one of her weird moods, but the more you thought about it, the more it stuck in your head.
the way she’d been so quiet, her gaze distant, it was strange, even for her.
as you made your way to your next class, you couldn’t help but vent to yeji, who listened intently as she walked beside you.
“it was so weird,” you tried to explain. “she just stood there while danielle was talking to me. like, awkwardly silent the whole time. and then she walked away without saying anything, like — what was that?”
yeji snorted. “classic minjeong,” she said, rolling her eyes. “probably trying to act mysterious. you know, her usual icy queen routine — all the reason why her nickname’s winter.”
“i don’t get it, though,” you said, frowning. “she came back into the library just to help me with contracts and then she acted all…weird when danielle showed up.”
“maybe she’s jealous,” she suggested with a smirk.
“jealous?” you repeated, raising an eyebrow. “of what?”
“danielle; she sees you getting close to someone else and suddenly remembers she doesn’t like sharing.”
“that’s ridiculous,” you said quickly, shaking your head. “minjeong doesn’t care about me like that anymore. she made that pretty clear when she dumped me in front of everyone.”
yeji shrugged. “maybe. or maybe she’s just realising what she lost.”
the thought lingered in the back of your mind as you reached your next class: professor diaz’s administrative lecture.
the room was already filling up with students when you walked in and minjeong was seated near the middle, often her usual spot. you hesitated for a split second when your eyes met hers, but you quickly looked away and took a seat beside yeji in the back row.
professor diaz walked in a moment later, his sharp gaze sweeping over the room as he placed his notes on the desk.
“good afternoon, everyone,” he started, tone brisk as always. “today, we’re starting a project that will require collaboration, critical thinking and presentation skills. it’s an activity that requires two members per team.”
you glanced at yeji, who gave you a small, sympathetic smile. you weren’t a fan of group projects, but you could survive it.
hopefully.
“partners have already been assigned,” he continued, flipping through a list of names. “i paired you based on complementary skills and previous performance. some of you might not like it, but tough luck.”
again, you slouched slightly in your seat, praying to every higher power you could think of that you wouldn’t end up with —
“y/n l/n and kim minjeong.”
you groaned quietly, earning a small laugh from the girl beside you. “tough break,” she whispered, smirking.
you’ve got to be fucking kidding.
you reluctantly made your way to the middle of the room, where minjeong was sitting, her expression unreadable as always. she didn’t look surprised to see you, which only annoyed you more.
“of course,” you muttered as you dropped into the seat beside her. “because who else would i get stuck with other than you?”
“nice to see you too,” she said dryly, flipping open her notebook.
professor diaz continued explaining the project from the front of the room. “we’re diving into the practical application of judicial review in administrative law, specifically focusing on procedural fairness and its two pillars: the right to a fair hearing and the rule against bias.”
he paced the front of the room, hands clasped behind his back. “your task is to analyse a hypothetical case, identify the grounds for judicial review and argue whether the administrative decision should be upheld or quashed; this project will span the next week or two, depending on how i feel. the final deliverable will include a written report and a joint presentation to the class.”
you collectively groaned with everyone else, pulling out your notes as you glanced at minjeong. “so,” you said flatly, “what case should we pick?”
“something straightforward,” she replied, her tone calm. “we don’t have time to overcomplicate this.”
“righto,” you said, opening your laptop. “let’s look at some recent cases.”
the two of you worked in tense silence for a few minutes, scrolling through legal databases and jotting down notes. the tension was palpable, hanging heavy between you. you could feel her gaze on you every now and then and it made your skin crawl.
“why do you think professor cho paired us?” you asked finally, breaking the silence.
“probably because your grades improved when i was tutoring you,” minjeong said matter-of-factly.
you glared at her, but she didn’t flinch. “well, that’s embarrassing.”
“why?” she asked, tilting her head slightly. “it’s the truth.”
her words caught you off guard, leaving you momentarily speechless. you quickly shook it off, refocusing on the project. “whatever. let’s just get this over with.”
minjeong didn’t respond, but she watched you carefully, her expression unreadable. you looked so beautiful.
as much as she tried to focus on the project, her mind kept drifting to one thought: you deserve better than this. better than me.
she didn’t say it. instead, she turned her attention back to the case in front of her, determined to at least help you succeed in this, even if it meant spending the next few days side by side.
the library became your designated meeting spot for the project, mostly because it was neutral ground. neither of you wanted to be in each other’s spaces and the library was safe and impersonal.
together, you worked in a tense but oddly productive silence during your free time, with occasional moments of begrudging cooperation when one of you needed clarification or feedback.
the first few sessions were uneventful, though the air between you was thick with unspoken words. minjeong would occasionally glance at you when she thought you weren’t looking, her gaze lingering just long enough for you to notice, but she never said anything about it.
it was during your third meeting that everything went sideways.
you were both seated at a table in one of the quieter corners of the library, surrounded by books and notes as you debated how to frame your analysis of the case.
minjeong had just finished explaining her point when a loud, overly enthusiastic voice shattered the peace.
“minjeong!”
you looked up, already cringing as sungchan approached your table, his usual grin plastered across his face. he was carrying a coffee cup in one hand and what looked like a wrapped pastry in the other.
“what are you doing here?” she asked, her tone cool but tinged with annoyance.
“what does it look like?” he said, pulling up a chair uninvited and plopping down beside her. “i saw my favourite girl through the window and thought i’d bring you coffee. and a croissant. your favourite, right?”
she sighed, her eyes briefly flickering to you before landing back on his. “i’m busy.”
“you’ve got to eat, right? and who’s this?” he glanced at you, his eyes narrowing slightly. “oh…y/n, right?”
you raised an eyebrow. “yeah, we’re working on a project if you’ve got eyes.”
sungchan’s gaze darted between you and minjeong, his grin faltering just a little. “huh, weird pair. but then again…” he trailed off, his smirk returning. “you two used to date, didn’t you?”
her jaw tightened, but she didn’t say anything. you, on the other hand, just rolled your eyes. “what’s your point?”
“nothing,” he replied, leaning back in his chair as he crossed his arms. “just funny how things work out, isn’t it? i mean, you’re stuck working with her, and she —”
“sungchan,” minjeong interrupted, her voice sharp. “stop.”
he blinked, clearly caught off guard by her tone. then he laughed, shaking his head. “fine, fine. i’ll stop. but, you know, it’s interesting —”
“sungchan,” she repeated, firmer this. “leave. we’re busy.”
he didn’t leave. instead, he looked at her, then at you and back again. and then, with a smug grin, he said, “wait minjeong, i thought you said you never liked her.”
the words hung in the air like a bomb waiting to explode. your stomach twisted, heart dropping into your chest as you stared at minjeong. she froze, her eyes widening slightly as she opened her mouth to respond.
“what the hell is that supposed to mean?” you spoke for her, your voice low but sharp as you glared at sungchan.
“i’m just saying,” sungchan replied with a shrug, clearly oblivious to the tension he’d just created. “she told me she never really liked you. thought you’d have figured that out by now. why are you still sticking around?”
“sungchan,” minjeong snapped, her voice colder than ice now. “leave. now — before i knock your fucking teeth out of you.”
he finally seemed to realise he’d crossed a line, his grin faltering as he stood up. “jeez, okay. no need to bite my head off,” he set the coffee and croissant down on the table, muttering, “enjoy your project,” before walking off.
the silence that followed was deafening.
“did you really say that?” you asked quietly, your voice trembling just enough to betray how much it hurt.
she looked at you, her expression panicked for a split second before she forced herself to remain calm. “no,” she said firmly. “he’s lying. why would i do that?”
“so he just made that up?” you shot back, your tone harsher now. “out of nowhere?”
“yes,” she said, her voice steady but strained. “i never said that. i —” she hesitated, her gaze dropping to the table. “i wouldn’t say that about you, ever.”
you scoffed, leaning back in your chair. “great, so now i’m supposed to believe that, what? he’s just running around making up lies about you?”
“i don’t know,” she mumbled, her voice quieter now. “but i didn’t say it. you have to believe me.”
you stared at her for a long moment, searching her face for any hint of insincerity but she looked genuinely upset, her usual mask of indifference cracking just enough for you to see the guilt and frustration beneath it.
“whatever,” you muttered finally, looking away. “let’s just finish this stupid project.”
minjeong opened her mouth to respond, but then she closed it again, her shoulders slumping slightly. for the rest of the session, neither of you spoke unless it was directly about the project.
the air between you was heavier than ever, weighed down by everything that had been said — and left unsaid.
finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. you slammed your pen down on the table, the sharp sound cutting through the library’s quiet hum.
“do you think this is funny?” you snapped, your voice low but furious as you glared at her. “is this all just some game to you?”
she looked up, startled by your sudden outburst. “what are you talking about?”
“you,” you hissed, your chest heaving as your emotions boiled over. “you dump me in front of everyone, act like i don’t exist for months and now you’re back in my life, acting like you care? and on top of that, sungchan shows up and says you never liked me? are you fucking kidding me, minjeong?”
for once, she looked genuinely at a loss, her usual composure completely shattered.
“do you even realise how humiliating this is for me?” you continued, your voice trembling with anger. “i have been trying to move on, to forget about you and every time i feel like i’m getting somewhere, you show up and remind me of how much of an idiot i am for still caring about you!”
“you’re not an idiot,” she said quickly, her voice soft but desperate. “y/n, i —”
“then why?” you demanded, leaning forward, your eyes burning into hers. “why did you break up with me like that? why do you keep showing up, acting like you care and then pulling shit like this?”
minjeong stared at you, her jaw tight, her eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite place. for a moment, you thought she wouldn’t answer. then, she exhaled shakily, running a hand through her hair.
“because i’m scared,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “i was scared then and i’m scared now.”
you blinked, thrown off by her sudden vulnerability. “scared of what?”
“of how much you mean to me,” she said, her gaze dropping to the table. “of how much you’ve always meant to me. y/n, when we were together, you…you saw right through me. you knew me better than anyone else ever has and it terrified me. because if you could do that, if you could get that close, then you could hurt me in ways no one else ever could.”
her voice cracked slightly, and she swallowed hard before continuing. “so i pushed you away. i thought if i ended it, if i made you hate me, then i could protect myself but all i did was hurt you, and i hate myself for that.”
you stared at her, your anger fading into something closer to disbelief. “you broke up with me in front of everyone.”
“i know,” she trembled. “i know and it was cruel and i’ll never forgive myself for it. but i didn’t mean it. i didn’t mean any of it. i thought if i made it loud, if i made it final, then i’d stop feeling the way i do about you. but it didn’t work.”
you shook your head, trying to process her words. “then why did you let sungchan say all that crap? why didn’t you stop him?”
“because i didn’t know how,” she admitted, her voice breaking. “i didn’t know how to fix this, how to tell you everything i’ve been feeling. i thought it was too late.”
“it is too late,” you said, your voice sharper than you intended. “you can’t just come back into my life and expect me to forgive you for everything. it doesn’t work like that.”
minjeong nodded, her expression crumpling slightly. “i know. i don’t expect you to forgive me. but i need you to know that i never stopped caring about you. not for a second.”
her words hung in the air, heavy and raw. you looked at her, at the way her usual calm had completely unraveled and you didn’t know what to say.
part of you wanted to scream at her, to tell her that her feelings didn’t matter anymore.
“i don’t know if i can do this,” you said finally, your voice quieter now but no less firm. “i don’t know if i can trust you again.”
“i understand,” she looked down, fidgeting with the hem of shirt. “but i’ll do whatever it takes to prove to you that i mean it. i’ll wait as long as you need me to.”
you didn’t say anything — you didn’t need to for now. instead, you turned your attention back to your notes, your chest tight with a mixture of anger and sadness. the girl across from you stayed silent after that, giving you the space you needed, but you could feel her presence beside you, heavy and unrelenting.
she had said all the things you’d once wanted to hear — things you’d longed for when she left you shattered in the middle of that hallway.
“y/n,” minjeong’s voice was quiet, hesitant. “please say something.”
you didn’t look at her. “there’s nothing to say.”
“you don’t believe me,” she said softly, more a statement than a question.
“no,” you admitted, your tone clipped. “i don’t.”
the words hung between you like a final nail in the coffin. minjeong opened her mouth to respond, but you were already standing, gathering your things with deliberate precision.
“where are you going?” she asked, panic flickering in her voice.
“home,” you said shortly. “i need to think.”
“what about the project?” she asked, her voice rising slightly.
you hesitated for a fraction of a second, then put your bag over your shoulder. “figure it out.”
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
for the next few days, you avoided her like the plague. you skipped the library sessions, ignored her texts and avoided her in class. when professor diaz asked about your progress on the project, you lied, saying you were working on it separately.
ryujin cornered you in the courtyard one afternoon, her arms crossed and her brow furrowed.
“what’s going on with you?” she demanded. “you’ve been weird all week.”
“nothing,” you replied, looking away.
“bullshit,” she snapped. “this is about minjeong, isn’t it?”
you didn’t answer, but your silence was enough.
“y/n,” she sighed, her tone softening. “you can’t keep running from this. i know she screwed up, okay? we all know that. but you need to deal with it instead of shutting everyone out.”
“i’m not shutting everyone out,” you defended yourself.”
“you’ve been avoiding her, skipping the library and now you’re lying to the professor about the project,” she listed off. “sounds like shutting everyone out to me.”
“it’s none of your business,” you muttered, brushing past her.
“actually, it is,” a new voice chimed in. you turned to see beomgyu and yeji approaching, both looking equally concerned. “because now we have to deal with mopey minjeong asking about you.”
“she’s not —” you started, but beomgyu cut you off.
“oh, she is,” he said, raising an eyebrow. “she asked me yesterday if you’d said anything about her. looked like a kicked puppy when i told her no.”
“you’re being dramatic,” you muttered, but your resolve was weakening.
“he’s not,” yeji said firmly. “and honestly, y/n, it’s exhausting watching you both avoid each other when clearly there’s so much unresolved.”
“i’m done with her,” you admitted, though the words felt hollow even to you.
“are you?” ryujin challenged, her eyes narrowing. “because you don’t look done. you look hurt. and if you keep bottling this up, it’s only going to get worse.”
on the other side of campus, minjeong was facing her own intervention. her friends had dragged her to the gazebo, refusing to let her leave until they got answers.
“spill,” jimin demanded, leaning forward with her arms crossed. “what’s going on with you and y/n?”
“nothing,” minjeong muttered, staring at the ground.
“oh, please,” aeri rolled her eyes. “you’ve been moping around like someone stole your dog. what happened?”
minjeong sighed, running a hand through her hair. “i…told her how i felt.”
“and?” yizhuo prompted, raising an eyebrow.
“and she doesn’t believe me,” she admitted, her voice small.
jimin groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. “well, can you blame her? you broke her heart in front of the entire university, minjeong, and when she chased you around, you ran faster.”
“and you’ve been cold and distant ever since,” aeri added. “what did you expect? that she’d just fall back into your arms the moment you said you cared?”
“i wasn’t expecting anything,” minjeong said defensively. “i just…i wanted her to know the truth.”
“okay, so you told her,” yizhuo shrugged. “now what?”
“she’s avoiding me,” minjeong responded, her voice cracking slightly. “she won’t answer my texts or show up for the project. i don’t know what to do.”
“maybe start by actually communicating,” jimin suggested dryly. “you know, instead of expecting her to read your mind.”
“and stop being so passive,” aeri chimed in. “if you want her to believe you, you need to show her. actions, not just words.”
“but what if it’s too late?” minjeong asked, her voice trembling. “what if she doesn’t want me anymore?”
jimin sighed, her expression softening. “then you’ll have to accept that. but at least you’ll know you tried.”
“i’m just going to drink my heart out.”
the sun was just beginning to set, casting a soft orange glow over the campus as you made your way toward the stairs that led home. the day had been long and all you wanted was to collapse into bed. as you reached the top of the stairs, you spotted jimin, aeri and yizhuo waiting for you like a trio of judgmental guardians.
“great,” you muttered under your breath, already preparing for whatever nonsense they were about to throw your way.
“y/n,” jimin said, stepping forward with a raised eyebrow, “we need to talk.”
“can’t it wait?” you asked, brushing past her, but aeri stepped in your way, blocking your path with her arms crossed.
“it’s about minjeong,” aeri said flatly, her piercing gaze locking on yours.
that stopped you in your tracks. you didn’t look at them, but your stomach twisted in knots. “what about her?”
yizhuo sighed dramatically, leaning against the stone railing. “she’s at joe’s juice joint. drinking.”
“on a tuesday night,” jimin added, mirroring aeri’s stance. “because word has it that a certain someone has been avoiding her.”
you scoffed. “i don’t care what she does.”
“she’s been there since this afternoon,” aeri said, raising an eyebrow. “she’s refusing to leave and we’ve had her guards attempt to pick her up.”
“because of you,” yizhuo chimed in, her voice unusually serious. “she thinks you’re done with her.”
you rolled your eyes, clutching the strap of your bag tighter. “she brought this on herself.”
“she did,” jimin agreed, stepping closer. “but she’s still hurting. and whether you want to admit it or not, you care about her.”
“why don’t you pick her up then?” you shot back, but your voice wavered slightly, betraying your frustration.
“because,” yizhuo shook her head. “it’s not us she’s been crying about. trust me, we’ve tried.”
that stung.
the three of them watched you expectantly, their expressions a mixture of smugness and concern.
finally, you let out a defeated sigh. “fine, i’ll go and talk to her.”
“thank you,” aeri smiled, stepping aside. “and while you’re at it, remind her that drowning her sorrows in alcohol isn’t a personality trait.”
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the bar was dimly lit, the scent of citrus and wood polish thick in the air. it wasn’t crowded, but the familiar hum of chatter and soft music filled the space. you scanned the room quickly, your heart sinking when you spotted her in the far corner.
minjeong sat slouched in her chair, one arm resting lazily on the table while the other clutched a half-empty glass of whiskey. her blazer hung off her shoulders, her usually neat blonde hair slightly disheveled.
she looked up as you approached, her eyes widening briefly before she looked away, taking a long sip from her drink.
“minjeong,” you called out, voice firm. “what are you doing here?”
she didn’t answer right away, swirling the liquid in her glass. “drinking.”
“on a tuesday night?” you pressed, sitting down across from her. “this isn’t like you.”
she snorted, the sound bitter. “maybe you don’t know me as well as you think.”
“cut the bullshit, minjeong,” you said sharply. “why are you here?”
she set her glass down with a thud, her lips trembling slightly. “because you won’t talk to me,” she said, her voice cracking. “because i miss you, y/n. i miss you so much and it hurts.”
her words hit you like a punch to the gut, but you refused to let your guard down. her usually cold demeanour was gone, replaced by something raw and vulnerable.
“you don’t get to say that,” you clenched your jaw. “you don’t get to sit here and cry about how much you miss me after what you did.”
she winced, her hands gripping the edge of the table. “i know, y/n. and i hate myself for it. i hate that i hurt you, that i pushed you away. but i didn’t know what else to do.”
“so you thought breaking my heart in front of everyone was the solution?” you snapped, your voice trembling. “you made me feel like i didn’t matter to you, minjeong. like i was nothing.”
“you were everything,” she said, her voice desperate. “that’s what scared me. i thought…if i ended it, i’d protect myself. but all i did was destroy the best thing that ever happened to me.”
“winter —” you started, but she cut you off, her eyes finally meeting yours.
“you have every reason to hate me,” she said, her voice breaking. “but i can’t stop thinking about you. i don’t want anyone else. i just want you, for the rest of my life, i’m certain i want you.”
her confession left you stunned, the sincerity in her voice breaking down the walls you’d so carefully built. you didn’t realise how much you’d needed to hear those words until now.
“you really hurt me,” you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. “i don’t know if i can trust you again.”
“let me earn it,” she said, her eyes pleading. “please, y/n. give me another chance. i’ll do whatever it takes.”
her words lingered in the air, and for a moment, you hesitated; part of you wanted to walk away and protect yourself from getting hurt again.
but you loved her.
“fine,” you said finally, your voice soft. “but you’re going to have to work for it. and right now, we’re getting you out of here.”
to your surprise, she didn’t hesitate. she grabbed her blazer, threw it over her shoulders and clung to your arm as you guided her out of the bar, her grip firm as if she was afraid you’d let go.
“you don’t have to do this,” she mumbled, her voice slurred. “you don’t owe me anything.”
“you’re right,” you said, guiding her through the door. “but someone has to make sure you don’t end up passed out on the sidewalk.”
she let out a weak laugh, her fingers tightening around your arm. “you’re too good to me.”
“don’t push it,” you muttered, but the corners of your lips twitched.
when you reached the car, she refused to let go of your hand. even as you opened the door for her, she tugged you closer, pressing soft, clumsy kisses to your knuckles.
“minjeong,” you said, your voice tinged with exasperation. “get in the car.”
“i don’t deserve you,” she murmured, her lips brushing against your skin. “but i’ll do whatever it takes to keep you this time.”
you sighed, your heart twisting as you gently pried her hands off yours and helped her into the passenger seat.
the ride to her mansion was cloaked in a heavy silence, save for the occasional sniffle from her. her head rested gently on your shoulder, her fingers entwined with yours.
the gesture felt intimate, almost too much for the charged air between you, but you didn’t pull away. you weren’t sure if it was to comfort her or yourself.
“i missed you,” she began, planting another gentle kiss on the back of your hand. “i wish i told you sooner.”
you hummed, nodding as you pulled up to the gates of her mansion. “i wish you did too.”
minjeong didn’t move. her gaze was fixed on your joined hands, her thumb absentmindedly tracing circles over your skin. she let out a shaky breath, her lips parting as if to speak but no words came.
“winter?” you prompted softly, your brows knitting together in concern.
she finally looked up at you, her eyes glossy and filled with something raw, vulnerable. “i don’t want to go inside,” she whispered, her voice trembling.
you tilted your head. “why not?”
“because…” she hesitated, her grip on your hand tightening slightly. “because i don’t want to be alone.”
her words hit you square in the chest, and for a moment, you didn’t know how to respond. her eyes searched yours and then, hesitantly, she leaned forward just slightly, her breath warm against your lips.
she stopped, hovering close, her needy voice barely audible. “can i kiss you? please?”
the question made your heart stutter. the vulnerability in her voice; you could see how much this moment mattered to her, how much she was holding herself back, waiting for your permission.
“minjeong,” you let out a shaky breath; unsure. “you’ve been drinking. you’re not sober and i don’t want to take advantage of you.”
she shook her head quickly, her fingers tightening around yours. “it’s not like that,” she pleaded, her voice cracking slightly. “i know what i’m asking. this isn’t the alcohol talking. it’s me — your winter, remember?”
you stared at her, your chest tightening as her words settled over you. “are you sure?”
“please,” she whispered, leaning just a little closer. “just one kiss. i need you to know how much you mean to me.”
then you nodded, your voice barely audible as you said, “okay.”
the relief on her face was instant. she leaned in slowly, giving you time to pull away if you wanted to, but you didn’t. her warm lips brushed against yours softly, hesitantly, as if she was afraid of pushing too far. her hand came up to cup your cheek, her thumb brushing against your skin in a gentle, almost praising way.
her tongue darted out to meet yours, hesitant at first but growing bolder as the kiss grew more intense. your tongues danced together, a rhythm of unspoken words and emotions too overwhelming to say aloud.
her fingers moved to cup your face, thumbs brushing against your skin as if she was trying to memorise the feel of you.
she wasn’t just kissing you — she was apologising, pleading and pouring every unspoken word into the way her lips moved against yours.
you hummed softly against her lips, your hands finding their way to her waist and pulling her closer. she smiled when your skin pressed against hers letting your arm snake around her body.
and once minjeong was no longer content with just that, she shifted in her seat, climbing over the console until she was straddling you in the driver’s seat. her knees pressed against the sides of the chair, her body fitting perfectly against yours as her hands tangled in your hair.
the kiss turned hungrier, more desperate, as if she was afraid this moment might slip away. her fingers pulled your hair slightly as her lips moved against yours with a hunger that made your heart race.
your hands slid up her back, pressing her closer until there wasn’t an inch of space left between you.
“minjeong,” you murmured against her lips, your voice breathless but she silenced you with another kiss, her lips capturing yours in a way that made your head spin. “this isn’t one kiss.”
“please don’t push me away,” she whispered between kisses, her voice trembling. “i’ll prove it to you, y/n. i’ll prove that i can be better. just…don’t let me go.”
your hands gripped her waist, anchoring her to you. “i’m not pushing you away,” you replied softly, your lips brushing against hers. “but this doesn’t fix everything.”
“i know,” she mumbled quickly, her forehead resting against yours. “but i miss you, i’m sorry.”
you kissed her again, slower this time, more deliberate. your tongues moved together in the same rhythm, her hands trailing down to your shoulders, her touch lingering as if she was afraid you might vanish.
when you finally broke apart, both of you were breathing heavily, your foreheads still pressed together. her eyes fluttered open and she looked at you with so much adoration in her eyes.
“come inside,” she whispered, her voice soft but insistent. “please, stay with me tonight.”
“okay,” you pressed a kiss against her cheek, your voice steady despite the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside you. “let’s go.”
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
the end.
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axolotl4days · 17 hours ago
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Batfam au angst :) also leading into (platonic) yandere batfam
What if Jason wasn't the first kid to die :)
And what if Damian wasn't Bruce's only biological kid :)
Au idea I'm simple terms: what if Bruce had a daughter in his early years of batman, who went missing and dead, but then years later reappeared and was found again, Bruce and the others won't make the same mistake twice.
Author's note before reading: Please keep in mind I'm new to this fandom, so I don't know much about what's canon. I simply get creative ideas really easily and have decided to share them.
If anyone else likes this idea, feel free to rewrite or add onto the concept, if you do please tag me I'd love to see what others do with this concept
I'm picturing reader to be the same age as or potentially slightly younger than Damian, but no specific ages are mentioned
Damian POV:
It was a day like any other, awful, Damian had to go to school. He didn't hate school, just the people there, loud, annoying, nosy.
He went about his day the same as always, reading in class and working on his work, until suddenly the principle came to class abruptly saying they had a new student, which the teacher promptly assigned to sit next to Damian. Great.
The teacher also informed him that he would be the one to show this new student around. So Damian braced himself for the extra annoying questions about him and his family, after all that's what people always want to know.
But to his suprised? This girl didn't care about any of that, simply asking questions about the class and school. She didn't even ask if he was really a Wayne, she looked a bit suprised but it wasn't the usual suprise most people had, and she didn't ask him any questions about it so it didn't matter.
As he showed her around he found out that they had the same classes, he heard her sigh of relief, but when questioned she said she was glad because it ment she wouldn't be alone in any of her classes and she'd have someone to turn to.
As the day went on they would go to class and work on classwork, it seems his new classmate was a lot smarter than the rest of them and he didn't have to constantly help her with work.
At the end of the day he made a mental note of a new acquaintance.
Later that day
"Ah, Master Damian, welcome back. How was your day at school?" Alfred asked, greeting the young boy
"It was alright Pennyworth, we had a transfer student today, but she seemed to be quite intelligent unlike the rest of those peasants" Damian replied
"Oh? A transfer student? In the middle of the school year? How odd."
"Yeah, I'll keep an eye out for any suspicious behavior, but there wasn't anything out of the ordinary, her name is Y/n." Damian said, but after saying her name he noticed Alfred looked pale
"Pennyworth? Are you feeling ill? Do I need to inform father?" Damian asked
"No no, I'm quite alright, it's just, I... used to know someone with that name, so I was suprised to hear it. That's all." Alfred replied, but he still looked pale
"If you say so. I'm going to head to my room and work on schoolwork before it's time for patrol" Damian said, and he was gone without another word
Alfred's POV:
'Calm yourself Alfred. It's a normal name that anyone could have, besides, it's been 20 years. Even if it was her she wouldn't be part of the young masters class. Still... I should inform Master Bruce, incase he mentions this classmate' Alfred thinks to himself before heading to the batcave.
There he finds both Bruce and Tim, working on the computer, searching for sightings of criminal activity, recently rumors of a new villain with unknown powers had started to arise, so it was the batman's job to keep Gotham safe
"Ahem, apologies for interrupting, but I need to borrow Master Bruce for a moment" Alfred says
"Did something happen Alfred?" Bruce asks
"No, not necessarily, it's nothing serious but we need to talk" Alfred replies
Bruce gets up and follows Alfred out of the room
"What is it Alfred? You look like you've seen a ghost." Bruce states
"Apologies Sir, as I said, it's nothing serious, however Damian informed me of a new classmate at school today" Alfred starts
"In the middle of the year?" Bruce comments
"That's what I said, however that isn't the point, I simply wanted to let you know before hand, incase the young master mentions this classmate infront of you.." Alfred pauses
"That's it? Why would you need to inform me of that" Bruce asks confused
"Well you see. He said that her name was... Y/n" Alfred states, and Bruce becomes just as pale as he is
"I see.... did Damian tell you anything else about this.... classmate?" Bruce asks
"No, he did not. But simply stated he'd keep an eye out for anything suspicious." Alfred said
"I understand." Bruce said with a deep sigh
"Are you alright Master Bruce? I know it's been a long time but-"
"I'm fine Alfred. I just... I'm fine. I need to head back to work now, we still don't know what this new villain is capable of, or what they're after." Bruce says, turning away
"Alright sir, if you insist. Please take care of yourself."
Alfred says, but he knows how Bruce is
The patrol went on as normal, and so did school. Nothing particularly interesting happened it was a week like any other, Damian and y/n would work on schoolwork together during breaks, since y/n joined late she had a lot of work to catch up on but she didn't have much trouble and Damian helped her when she did. The two had even become friends, turns out they had a lot in common, and some classmates tried to joke about how they were like siblings, but the two didn't mind. The jokes did make Damian aware of how... familiar y/n looked. He pondered the idea of her being a child from a one night stand, but the timelines didn't match up so he brushed the thought away, thinking it was a coincidence that she looked so much like Bruce. But nothing out of the ordinary happened of note, not until one fateful patrol where Damian made a discovery
Y/n POV:
Y/n didn't know where to go after waking up again, it was clear so many things have changed, and her dad taught her well. She needed more information before she made any decisions.
Unfortunately this ment she had no place to stay. After all, she couldn't go to an orphanage, she wasn't an orphan and she didn't have any documents or a story on where she came from. She knew better than to go to the police, what would she even say to them? So here she was. Sitting under a bridge hoping she won't get sick. But she was strong, she'd do what she'd have to in order to understand the situation better. Even if that means sleeping under a bridge like a troll, even if it means only eating the food provided by the school, even if it means-
"Hello there. Are you alright?" A voice asked making her jump
She turns to see, some sort of vigilante. She had heard in passing about how her dad Batman wasn't the only vigilante in Gotham anymore, so she figured it was one of them
"Oh um, I'm alright" she replied, she hadn't planned to meet any of them, she knew she might meet batman, which she kind of hoped for because then she could get some answers, but this was new territory this was- wait a minute why does he kind of look like Damian?
"Are you sure? Your sitting underneath a bridge at night, kids shouldn't be out here like this you could get hurt. Or worse. Why aren't you with your parents?" The vigilante (Damian) said, after recognizing his classmate, assessing the situation
"It's... complicated" y/n replies, before wondering how much she should tell him "I... can't really talk about it, but I can't go back home.. not yet at least, and I don't have anywhere else to go, so I've just been here" she states, hoping she didn't say to much
The vigilante just stays there for a moment, not saying anything, and she wonders if she said to much or if he thinks she's a criminal
"I see. In any case, you shouldn't be out here alone, the streets of Gotham aren't safe, however if you insist on staying out here may I suggest somewhere that isn't so easily spotted? You wouldn't want to be attacked. I know a few places that are safer than.. this" The vigilante says offering a hand
"Oh, uhm" y/n thinks for a moment, weighing her options "I'll take you up on that offer, it's not great down here" y/n replies, taking his hand
The two go to a more remote, slightly cleaner area
"Here we are, even if it's temporary this would be a better place for a shelter than where you were before. I don't know what's going on, but if you need assistance, im willing to help" the vigilante replies
"Thank you, you've really been more than enough help and I appreciate it a lot. If I need anything il let you know....."
"... Robin. My name is Robin." Robin says, noticing her pause
"Robin... thank you for the help, good luck with the rest of your patrol" y/n says
"Of course, you be careful now, always keep an eye out." Robin says, before leaving
'Phew.... he's gone. That was definitely him, and he definitely recognized me. Now what. He didn't say anything so they're definitely still doing the secret identity thing. I guess I'll just have to play it cool and hope he doesn't say anything at school. If any of the teachers find out I'm definitely gonna get investigated and then my whole plan will be thrown out the window.' Y/n thinks to herself 'Maybe this is a good thing, if he's Robin, it's likely that dad's still Batman too, which means I might run into him. What if he doesn't recognized me? What if he does recognize me?? What if- what if he didn't miss me.... no, no! This is dad, of course he missed me but it's been... so long... what do I do if he doesn't want me back...' y/n starts to worry about before she falls to the floor and starts to cry
Which, unbeknownst to her, Damian saw, he doesn't know why she's crying or why it makes him feel so... protective but he knows somethings up, so he goes off and reports what he knows to Batman
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aaaaand cliffhanger! Mwahahahaha
I would have kept going, and I know exactly what's coming next, but I've been typing for awhile and I have no idea how long this post is, and I don't want it to be too long
So I'm stopping it there,
This wasn't supposed to be this much but my creative brain decided to run with this idea, so there's gonna be a part 2 soon
Also I've decided to call this au
Batman Dead Daughter Au
Because.... idk what else to call it and if I'm gonna make a part 2 and potentially more depending on how this goes, I'm gonna need something to refer to it with.
As I said before, I'm extremely new to the batman stuff
Pretty much all of my knowledge comes from youtube and tumblr, so bare with me if things are out of character
I've also never written fanfiction before, it's always just been in my head, so the writing is probably a bit funny
Yes I'm a writer in the making but I haven't actually gotten to the writing part
And fanfiction is a bit different
Hope yall like the concept tho
Again, feel free to write your own version of this if you want to, just tag me so I can read it too lol
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zombeebunnie · 21 hours ago
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Trembling Essence:💙CG work and clean up!💙
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Hello hello guys and welcome new followers, here's how everything is go so far!
This week went by really fast and I managed to get more completed when I had the chance.
Sadly, this post is a little delayed because the battery to my computer shorted out and died. In good news I managed to save 85%(?) of what I did but the progress towards the end was lost and I need to save up for a new battery. I might open up chibi commissions through ko-fi, I just need time to set it up. :,]
Clean up progress:
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Outside of testing, grammar checking, etc, the beginning of the cabin part leading up to this section is nearly done!
I finished balancing the choices and alternate dialogs depending on how close you are with Noah. One or two of these also have 1* more choice added to sort of give a vague response that doesn't force the player(Y/N) to choose the "good" choice. I fixed a small glitch where a change in scenery abruptly popped up on the screen instead of fading towards it. More of Noah's sprites have also been adjusted as well to give the player(Y/N) a better read on his expressions during certain dialog scenes. The original sprites I placed had Noah coming off as if he's blushing/flustered when it's just that the situation is awkward between the both of you.
Afternoon route:
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I was only able to fix up the rest of this route once you wake up and go with Noah into the kitchen. This section specifically is where I lost about 15% of progress. Most of what I did here was fix up the dialog and have it line up depending on how you talk to Noah before this route finishes out the rest of the day. I also found a glitch where past choices with Noah finding you in the swamp didn't match up correctly when the both of you talk together in the kitchen. :,]
Mini-quality of life update:
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I also updated a few choices by adding " " to the ones where the player(Y/N) is speaking to Noah versus it being an action. I'm still getting use to doing this so adjusting everything will take a bit of time. :[]
New scenes:
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I talked a bit about this in past game development posts but I'm not sure if I posted screenshots since I was still going through everything. To sum it up, these are immersive updates towards the game that aren't in the [Extended demo]. Some scenes went on a little too long and had the player(Y/N) just staring at the living room CG even if something else is being described in the cabin. The new CG's of Noah I added fixes some of it but I wanted the dialog to visually match up with what you see on screen a bit more too! This also includes the new dialog/scenes of Noah's hospitality towards the player(Y/N) and parts taking place in different areas of the living room.
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If you like what I create, please consider supporting what I do on kofi! All donations and tips help tremendously while I continue to work on the game. Since the battery to my computer shorted out and died I might open up chibi commissions through here, i just need time to figure it out. Thank you to those that optionally bought the [Extended Demo] on itch.io. :,]
Q&A / Ask box is open:
To know and understand Noah through Asks and random posts about lore, they'll be under #Get to know: Noah ! :]
**Some asks won't be answered if it contains spoilers but I do appreciate what I receive. :]
If you have any questions about Trembling Essence/Noah feel free to ask here or on itch.io please. This makes it easier for me to see and answer accordingly! I enjoy hearing from you guys!
A big thank you to everyone and the recently influx of support and encouragement, happy early Merry Christmas!!
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obsessive-valentine · 2 days ago
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I am in love with the vamp family!!! is reader forever going to be a young girl since she was tuned at a young age or do the vampires in your verse get older?? if she is forever young do you think it will ever impact the story?
I’ve been developing my platonic vampire lore and plan to share more soon, but feel free to ask specific questions in the meantime.
So readers mentioned being adolescent transitioning to young adult -15ish to maybe 20, totally up to interpretation (bc her exact age doesn't really change the story much). I usually imagine her as an older teenager, youthful but for the most part physically mature. If you picture her younger, her being "forever young" won't be a focus in my stories -well not like it is in 'interview with a vampire'.
While yes technically she’s frozen at the age she’s turned and won’t grow in the traditional sense, over time, the girl will just present more mature. Though youthful still, time and knowledge would give that illusion of her looking older than that age she was turned. Just by the way she holds herself, her eyes, presents herself and having a more vampiric look that changes her features a bit too. She might go from naive young teenager looking to looking like a well rounded young adult in as short of time as a few decades.
Story impact?-
My vampires are different creatures from humans, with instincts and brain chemistry that change after turning. They don’t reproduce traditionally, so romantic love doesn't exist how we think of it. Instead, their bonds are built on choice and shared purpose. Lavinia and Soren’s partnership is unusual—a deep understanding that requires effort, not romance (I'll get to their stories at some point). And most vampire families don’t mirror human ones; some have one head, others have multiple, and some function as close-knit groups.
Vampires are family-focused/ platonic love, so the girl doesn’t feel a need to mature physically to meet human expectations. Their instincts no longer factor in human goals—ideas like seeking a lover or stressing over appearances don’t cross her mind.
I do however think the girl could become angry or self conscious over people degrading (intentional or not) her bc her physical age be humans or even other vampires treating her like a child. But these would be brief moments few and far since she’s not involved with humans much and vampires tend not to focus on appearance as before mentioned.
I will say turning a kid (not a teenager/under 13) is forbidden. Younger people are rarely turned since fledglings are usually chosen for practical traits like intelligence or strength. But it's up to preference as some choose personality first, but most choose potential first, including the Beaumonts, which might come as a surprise when houses hear about the Beaumont's choosing a girl for personality.
Basically: Lavinia, would have never subjected someone she cares for to such a fate.
okay, that was longer than I expected, but I hope to clean up my lore and create a little fact page soon. Plz let me know if there's any plot holes I haven't thought about🙏. Also, thank you for the love ❤️ and an excuse to start ranting about my version of vampires.
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princessofgotham777 · 3 days ago
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Dating Jason Todd (Part Four)
fanfic type: angst, fluff, comfort (ongoing)
If you liked the Titans show but wish they handled Jason’s story line differently you might like this fic!
Hey so this is in fact my first time writing fanfiction (idk what my life has come to). Sorry if it’s cringy but also I would eat this up cause I LOVE some good angsty comfort fanfiction. I won’t write smut. I don’t think I’m gonna do requests but if you have any ideas feel free to let me know. Also of course I don’t own any DC characters this is purely fanfiction. Although I’ve had tumblr for a bit I’m not really used to posting stuff so sorry if I don’t format everything well. Thank you and I hope you enjoy. (I hope you like run-on sentences💀) (if you don’t like it don’t be rude just move on dude😃🧍‍♀️)
So story line, this doesn’t really take place in any specific universe but I’m gonna be pulling concepts from Titans, The Batman, Under the Red Hood, Arkham Knight lore and whatever lore I remember from the CW shows cause I grew up watching those, then just my imagination of course. Reader uses she/her pronouns btw.
Warnings: talking about death, suicide, depression, torture (it’s not graphic I hate gore it’s just sad), talking about intimacy (not graphic), struggling with eating, topics of grief
Part four: Arkham
Although you told Gar you were going to sleep that didn’t happen. Instead you stayed up picking apart the new note of the Jokers Dick sent you. Rachel texted you about an hour ago letting you know her and Kori got to Gotham safely and she promised to update you. You didn’t know why Dick felt the need to break one of the promises he made to you, but finding out that information was a problem for another day. The problem right now was finding Jason, he was all you could think about. You didn’t know where he was or what he could be going through.
Gotham City Point of View
Jason remembers finding Joker at the abandoned amusement park. He was sure he’d finally get his chance to drag joker to Arkham himself. It seems the exact opposite happened though, Jason was now tied to a chair in Arkham. He tried to move but was quickly ment with an excruciating stabbing pain through his whole body. It seemed to be coming from the barbed wire that kept him tied to the chair. He knew we was in Arkham because he recognized the cell from the times him and Bruce dropped by to ask various criminals various questions. Jason always suspected part of Arkham if not all of it was corrupt and not handling criminals properly. The fact that he was there confirmed his theory. His Robin suit was covered in blood, he assumed it was his own. The smell of the cell told him he was most likely in an abandoned condemned part of the hospital. It was oddly quiet, the only noise being from running rats and dripping of broken pipes.
Regular Point of View
“Y/N!” You felt someone shaking you awake. “Y/N,” Gar says.
“What! What’s happened!” You yelled suddenly not being at all tired.
“They think they decoded the latest note, Dick and Rachel said they called you but I guess you slept through it,” he says.
“Shit!” You say. “The note, what’s it say?”
“The baby bird is kept, where the bats mother wept, soon to only be, is what the Archer really needs, alone and free to be, haunted by eternity,” Rachel says through the phone.
“Obviously the baby bird is Jason and you’re the archer, the general idea is joker is gonna kill Jason to haunt you forever, what we can’t get is the location,” Dick says.
“Well bat is Batman obviously,” you say trying to calm down from being woken up so suddenly.
“Wasn’t Martha Wayne an Arkham?” Gar says.
“Holy shit!” You say. “Dick he’s at Arkham, joker has Jason at Arkham somewhere. Gar you’re a genius.”
“We’re on our way,” Dick says through the phone before he hangs up.
Gotham Point of View
Jason’s whole body hurt. He didn’t even know pain could feel this bad. Sure he’s broken bones, been tortured before, and nearly died, but none of that came close to what he was feeling now.
“So tell me Robin, or should I say Jason Todd,” Joker began to say. “What is it exactly that your little girlfriend sees in you?”
“Fucking excuse me?” Jason says.
“Well you surely know before you she had a thing with the other Robin, the first Robin…the better Robin,” Joker says.
Jason laughs, it causes him immeasurable amounts of pain but he laughs to cover his fear. “Damn clown, have you really seeped that low were you gotta get your entertainment from a fucking rumored young adult love triangle?” Jason says.
“You know,” Joker’s voice was serious it made a chill go up Jason’s spine. “You know replacement Robin, one day that smartass attitude of yours might just be the death of you,” he starts manically laughing again. Jason felt genuine pure fear at the crazy purple suit wearing man standing before him. Joker reached onto the filthy floor and picked up a crowbar.
Regular Point of View
You and Gar were sitting on the couch, wide awake, in silence when your phone rang well into the next morning.
“We haven’t found anything yet,” Dick says. “But we’ve got every cop and Arkham security guard in Gotham looking for him, we’re searching Arkham wing by wing.”
“Okay, can you put Rachel on,” you say.
“Hold up I wanna talk to you-“ he starts to say.
“Dick please put Rachel on,” you say again.
“I will in three fucking seconds but just answer me real quick. I heard you slept through fifteen phone calls. When’s the last time you ate something?”
“You are fucking unbelievable,” you say.
“Just answer the question,” he says.
“Last night,” you say in a condescending tone.
“And how long were you actually asleep for do you think?” He asks in a serious voice ignoring your passive aggressive tone.
“I don’t know…” you say “Like an hour or two,” you say.
“Right, I’ll put Rachel on then go to sleep and have Gar wake up as soon as we call again,” he says.
“Fine,” you say.
“Hey,” Rachel says.
“Hey how’s everything going?” You ask.
“It’s just what Dick said, we’re searching Arkham wing by wing, and Dicks going behind GCPD like a mom remaking a bed,” she says. That took you aback, the fact that Dick was going behind GCPD double checking to make sure each room was clear.
“Okay, thanks Rachel just call back as soon as you guys find something,” you say. You hang up and figure you should take Dick’s advice to try to get some sleep.
“Hey Gar, are you good staying up if I try to get some sleep?” You ask him.
“Yeah sure,” he says.
“Just make sure to wake me up as soon as someone calls,” you say.
“Course,” he says.
Back in Gotham Dick, Kori, Rachel and Barbra crept through every inch of Arkham searching for Jason.
“We missed down this hall,” Dick says to one of the cops.
“Yeah unit nine got that one,” the cop says.
“No I’m checking them all myself, Barbra’s orders,” Dick says.
“Yeah but that wings condemned, it’s simply not safe and-“ the cop is cut off when Dick starts speedily walking towards the hall.
“Sir! Sir! You can’t go down there!” The cop yells. Dick bursts through the door and apart from it being disgusting it looks structurally fine. He reaches for his ear piece and tells Barbra to send everyone over to sweep the wing. They search every cell, every hall, and every room under finally on the floor of one of the cells is a bloody boy beaten to a pulp lying dead wearing a Robin suit. On the floor of the Arkham cell was the corpse of Jason Todd. Dick checked his pulse and exhausted CPR before a cop ripped him from Jason’s body.
“He’s gone, he’s gone” Kori said taking Dick from the cop. Dick was completely out of it. He felt as thought he might throw up that is when he reverted back to the man he was before he became nightwing. He stormed over to Barbra.
“You’ve got dirty cops here,” he said angrily.
“I know, look you need to pull yourself together okay don’t do this here,” she says.
“You know? How would you father fucking feel about you letting his damn police force go to shit!” He yells.
“Hey! You are way fucking out of line, I know Jason’s dead but you need to stay focused, this isn’t over yet. And I know Arkham has gone to hell and so has half my police force but I’m doing the best I can,” Barbra says. Dick is about to say something else when he practically leaps over to Rachel and rips her phone out of her hand.
“The hell are you doing?” He says.
“Dick, we have to call them!” Rachel says.
“Listen Rachel give everyone a second okay,” Kori says.
“No, this is exactly why I’m here so you don’t wait five hours,” she says.
“Fine fine, you’re right but let me make the call I want to tell Gar first,” he says.
“Fine but let me tell Gar,” Rachel says.
Back at the tower Gar gets a call from Dick and the first thing he says is, “is Y/N asleep?”
“Yeah,” Gar says.
“Don’t wake her up yet,” Dick says.
“But she said-“ Gar starts to say before he’s interrupted by Rachel.
“Gar don’t wake her up yet,” Rachel says.
“What’s going on Rach, have you guys found Jason?” Gar asks.
“Yes, we found him.” She says. She hesitates before saying, “Gar, he’s…gone”
“Gone? What do you mean gone? Like disappeared again gone? Gone missing?” Gar says talking quickly.
“No Gar, he’s dead,” she says softly.
“What?” He says with a voice crack.
“We um, we found him in Arkham…it looks like he’s been beaten…he’s been beaten to death,” she says.
“Oh my God,” he says beginning to tear up. “Shit am I the one telling Y/N?” Gar asks.
“No, Dick said he will,” Rachel says.
“I’d really like to just let her sleep honestly,” Dick says.
“She wants to be waken up and told,” Rachel says. It’s not like Dick was scared to break the news he knew it was going to go badly. He just liked the idea of you asleep, peacefully unaware that you’d never see Jason again.
“Wake her up and give her the phone off speaker,” Dick says plainly.
“Y/N?” Gar says softly waking you up.
“What’s happened?” You say quickly snapping out of your sleepy state.
“Um…Dick is on the phone for you,” he says. You take the phone from Gar.
“Y/N,” Dick says softly.
“Have you found him,” you say with anticipation.
“I’m so sorry Y/N” Dick says.
“Sorry! What do you mean you’re sorry?” You say frantically.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my promise, we found Jason, he’s dead.” Dick says.
Hey, writing jokers dialogue felt awkward so I hope it’s not too cringy💀 Anyways if you liked the fic please like I really appreciate positive feedback cause then I know to continue posting parts. I’d like to keep posting parts to this story I plan on developing the whole redhood story line and then doing some backstory with how the reader met Jason and Dick and joined titans. So yeah any positive feedback would be greatly appreciated even if it’s just liking the fic! Thank you and I hope you enjoyed reading🩷
Also here’s my Masterlist if you haven’t read the other parts.
Masterlist
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destielfanfic · 2 days ago
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Group Ask #215
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Ask #1 ( @trampslike-us ): there’s this fic…#1
Hi! I have been searching for a fic to the point I think I’ve totally made it up now! Pretty sure it’s SU where Dean used to turn tricks to make money for him and Sam as teenagers and he’s working through some shit while him and Cas start a relationship. Sam doesn’t know about Deans past but Dean lets it slip at a dinner (poss thanksgiving?) at Jodie’s (I think!) after a few drinks. I keep going back to Like Moses and Batman thinking it must be that but get to the end and realise it’s not! If you have any idea what I’m talking about send help <3
Ask #2 ( @targaryenchester): there’s this fic…#2
I am at my wits end. I need to reread this fic like my life depends on it. But I can't find this fic anywhere. So the plot kind of goes like this- Dean is a Rockstar but he retired so Sam can have his own career, not just some nepo kid of a big shot singer. However sam screws up with drugs. Dean is retired, he sings at Ellen's bar. Sam feels bad so he brings Cas to check out a singer (Dean). Cas is part of a rival label but he still agrees. Sam is determined to help Dean relaunch his career. So that's how Cas meets Dean. At the bar when Dean is singing. That's the core setting. Does a fic like that rings a bell? Pls help me out🥺🥺
Ask #3 ( @grilmo-bartlett ): there’s this fic…#3
Hi! Im wondering if you can help me find a fic? its really not a destiel fic per se, but I think it was written by someone who hadn't actually seen supernatural and they thought dean was named "destiel." it was kind of a crack fic and I don't remember much else about it, but I feel like I saw it on tumblr. just spent the last hour or so looking and I cant get anywhere. Thank you so much for any help!
Ask #4 ( @buckbuckleydiaz118 ): there’s this fic…#4
Hi! I’m looking for a fic I read on AO3 a while ago and it was a longish multichapter fic, E rating I’m pretty sure. Dean and Cas were in college, Dean was a football player and kind of a bully to Cas and they hid their relationship for a while and had a big angsty break up because Dean saw Alastair bullying Cas again and just turned away instead of defending him yet again and then Dean had a breakdown when Cas left him and threw the necklace Dean gave him back at him. They reconciled after much groveling on Dean’s part. Anna and Gabriel were also in it as Cas’ supportive and protective friends. Thank you!
Ask #5 ( @caseyjw1973 ): there’s this fic…#5
Looking for a fic. It's either deleted or on another platform besides AO3. Dean is a rock star/musician. He performs with a mask. Cas is his assistant and he does not like Dean but is a huge fan of the masked musician. Dean ends up giving Cas a necklace as the singer. I started to read it but I didn't save it. Any ideas?
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benkyoutobentou · 19 days ago
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Life Update...
I just paid my tuition, so it seems like it's time to let the cat out of the bag. So long as my visa isn't randomly rejected, I'll be moving to Japan in spring of next year! I'll be there for one year at the very least, the plan is to be there for three to four years, but depending on how it goes and how everything pans out, I won't deny the possibility of moving there permanently.
My first plan of action is attending a language school, basically until I pass the N2. Right now I'd put myself at about halfway there, so my hope is to only spend one year in the language school. After that, and this is a big reason for my moving to Japan, I'll apply to a trade school for instrument repair. For those who don't know, I have a degree in music performance. While in university, I met someone who ended up moving back to Japan to get certified in instrument repair, and that's the school I'll be applying to! Instrument repair is an incredibly hard industry to break into in the United States, where I'm from and live right now, because there aren't any schools that offer courses in it.
Without saying exactly where I'll be, I am going to be in the Kansai region. I wasn't initially sure if I wanted to be outside of Tokyo for my first time living in Japan, but when I reached out to GoGoNihon and they recommended a Kansai school, it felt like fate. Kansai-ben is my favorite dialect of Japanese and it's been a far off pie-in-the-sky dream of mine to speak it effortlessly ever since I started learning Japanese.
Needless to say, I am excessively excited about this new journey in my life. And with that, please (please!) tell me your favorite spots in Japan, whether they're underrated hidden gems or tourist traps that everyone and their dog has been to. I want to know! Location and prefecture doesn't matter- with how long I'll be in the country, I'd like to take the opportunity to travel as much of it as I can. It also doesn't matter what it is. Tell me about your favorite roadside shrine, a great restaurant you went to, or your favorite specialty store. I also don't have an expiration date on this. If you want to tell me about somewhere in the next ten minutes, that's great, but I would also love to hear about it three weeks or even three months from now.
TLDR; I'm moving to Japan!
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Note
You always have good things to say in your essays, so I am curious what your overall thoughts are on the Sonic Movie 3 trailer?
Ah, well, thank you! I'm glad that you like what I have to say🥺❤️
So, I originally watched the trailer quickly before I had to go to work. I think at that time my general thoughts overall were basically:
Team Sonic!!🥺💖
Every new installment they surprise me with just how sad and wet Agent Stone's eyes can get in the presence of Robotnik
Pop pop?! Gerald?? He's alive??
Ough parallels between movie sonic and movie shadow
...What if Movie Shadow made a connection with Tails and Knuckles over their individual struggles in finding home despite their pasts?
Movie!Knuckles wants Movie!Shadow so bad it makes him look stupid. I love how excited he is to fight him. Like they just took Sonic's initial onesided fixation on fighting Shadow from SA2 and gave it to Knuckles and I'm not complaining
They should make Shadow and Tails implied friends like the Tailstubes did. For me 👉👈
Wooo fat movie Robotnik!
Ajsjsjjsq I love how he just ripped Stone's shirt off and kept it for himself
The juxtaposition between Sonic and Knuckles here is hilarious to me. Knuckles insulting Sonic when he sees Shadow, right in front of Sonic. Sonic trying to tell Knuckles they should be reasoning with Shadow and Knuckles is like "Nope can't hear you I need to fight him!"
I wonder just how much they're gonna tie in the Knuckles tv show. I kinda hope Wade and the flames of disaster make an appearance at least
I did, however, rewatch the trailer for this ask, so if you'd like to see some more in depth thoughts on the trailer, I've put them under the cut
"Sonic, you've finally found your family."
This line is interesting to me simply because Tom says it, but it only shows Knuckles and Tails onscreen.
Now, personally, I think this series is perfectly capable of presenting a version of "family" that doesn't 100% mean the nuclear family dynamics. In other words, especially since images of Maddie and Tom weren't put onscreen during Tom's line, I like to think that harkens back to the wish Tom and Maddie expressed for Sonic back in movie 2 to find his squad (his team of best friends and wingment to grow up with). In essence, I personally do not believe this line means "oh Knuckles and Tails are your siblings now", especially since it would contradict that sentiment in movie 2 and (while I don't think Knuckles finds them family in a nuclear family way either) would be weird paired up with Knuckles calling the Whipple family "home" in the Knuckles series.
So yes. Family because they're friends, wingmen, comrades who have each other's backs and work together, not because they're siblings unified under one particular household.
Woo! I see the flames of disaster!! Nice to see tidbits of things carrying over from the Knuckles series
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I am very interested in the shot of Tom uncovering the picture Sonic drew of himself and Long Claw.
I suspected back after movie 2 that we wouldn't be done talking about Long Claw. Of course this is true by default if they want to touch on the Echidna/Owl war stuff any more, which they have in every installment thus far, but I mostly mean in terms of how Sonic's past.
Personally, especially with Knuckles turning out to be the Iblis trigger after the Knuckles series, and those lines from Long Claw about Sonic potentially being hunted for his power (even though we yet have no evidence the Echidnas were hunting Sonic for any purpose), I still think there's a possibility of the movie universe touching more on Sonic and Long Claw for bigger reveals into the past (quite possibly into Sonic's origins??)
But at baseline of course we will be getting parallels from Sonic's past to Shadow's. So I'd say that how much we touch on Long Claw and Sonic's past in this movie and the importance of it will remain to be seen.
"I know it's not easy, but you didn't change who you are in here." "Yeah. In my lungs." "Or your heart."
(The following is partially a joke) Tonhon Chonlatee reference making it's way into Sonic movie 3??
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Okay, so it seems to be that someone is still going to free Shadow on Prison Island? The visuals kind of suggest he just broke out, but that line from Commander Walters can also still suggest that someone breached the security (Ala SA2 Eggman) to facilitate the freeing of Shadow. In this case, I'm highly curious as to who will be doing it, and whether they will be present when Shadow exits the pod. Personally, after Movie 2 I hoped it would be Agent Stone, but we'll get our answer when the movie comes out.
WOW that shot of Shadow punching through the glass of his stasis pod is freaking EPIC. Definitely a fav scene of him in this trailer for me
TEAM SONIC MENTIONED! (Team Sonic is my favorite team, so movies 2 and 3 are wins from me in seeing team dynamics with them)
THEM CRUMBS🥺💖
I am a shameless sontails shipper and lover of Tails so this shot is everything to me
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Okay, so earlier in the trailer we saw Team Sonic separately in places all over the world. Here I think at least one of these is to show them looking for someone like Shadow with intent to stop him (or to stop another threat at baseline). Also in the trailer we see a short clip of Sonic searching in a room with a flashlight.
My first thought on this is that during the course of the movie, Team Sonic's secondary objective (either self imposed or given by GUN) is to find out more about Shadow and his past. So this scene could be related to that.
My second thought is that this scene could also be Sonic taking a look for clues on the arc, though I'm not sold on this interpretation.
Third, at baseline, this is clearly a scene of searching for someone or something. No matter who it is though, I suspect the reason or room is related to either Ivo or Gerald in some form. Plus the fact that Sonic is searching most likely means he entered the scene with intent to search rather than spontaneously deciding this.
Finally, though I don't have many thoughts here. A figure can be seen in the background in the right of this clip. Since they are not also searching with a flash light, this could be a scene where we see Sonic caught in the act of what he's doing.
Commander Walters talks about how similar Sonic and Shadow's stories are during the clip of Sonic searching, Shadow in the pod while Maria stands outside of it, both pressing their palms to the glass.
While not necessarily a confirmation, this is why I believe that scene of Sonic searching is related to Shadow's past or possibly Gerald.
Also, unrelated, I really love that clip of Shadow smiling in the pod at Maria while they press their palms together over the glass. I'm completely normal about it (sarcasm)
"But where you found family and friends"
This line from Commander Walters is overlayed over shots of Tails (during "family") and Knuckles (during "friends"), a line which (like the earlier family line) I'm sure the loudest Sonic fans are making 1k note posts about.
Anyhow, I have two interpretations of the intent of this clip in the trailer, especially since it's another scene where they neglected to show Tom and Maddie in the mini montage
1. Where the scenes are cut is meant to associate Knuckles more strongly with "friends" and Tails more strongly with "family". In this case, "family" will be used in a found family/found home manner that does not denote in nuclear family with/siblings to. In any case, while Knuckles and Tails are both his friends and undoubtedly part of his squad, it remains that Knuckles and Tails do not have the same relationship to Sonic. Despite all being friends, we see at the beginning of the Knuckles series that Tails is comfortable living with Sonic and his textual adoptive parents, and that he doesn't have the same problems as Knuckles fitting in as Sonic's roommate. Likewise, based upon Movie 2's attachment to Sonic in particular and love of being considered Sonic's friend (with those moments in movie 2), combined with what we see at the beginning of the Knuckles series, it's clear to me that Tails' home is with Sonic and Sonic in specific. Tails is Sonic's friend who considers him his home, but while Knuckles is also his friend, he goes on a journey in the Knuckles series which was meant for him to find his own home (which he finds in the Whipple family). In other words, I'm saying that one interpretation of this clip is to denote the difference in strength of bond to and relationship Sonic has to members of his squad. Tails is his family, his best friend, and Sonic is part of Tails' home. Knuckles is his friend, squad member, ally, but he does not find home in Sonic.
2. The downfall of interpretation 1 is that it contradicts what I said about Sonic considering them both his family, his best friends, his squad earlier with the other family line. So interpretation 2 asserts that the whole friends and family line is meant to be applied to team Sonic. Again, especially with the absence of Tom and Maddie, I believe this is not in a nuclear family way, but as in "they are my friends, my squad, my family". As in, Sonic feels connected to these two and feels that they are family to him in the sense that they are important to him and a big part of his life. The family one chooses to stay connected to.
For the record, I'm also biased towards this interpretation of the family lines (not just because I don't personally like the alternative), but because every main character thus far has avoided ever labeling his relationship to Tails or Knuckles as inherently sibling like. Sonic movie 2 even had Maddie and Tom at the very end saying Sonic had found his squad and best friends for growing up, and the beginning of the Knuckles series has Sonic call the two his roommates, while Maddie treats the two more like other kids that live in the house than necessarily *her* kids. Then there's also the Knuckles series ending, where Knuckles calls the Whipple family his home, but the series purposely chooses not to make it clear what his role would be in a nuclear family dynamic, only that he's a part of it. All of that juxtaposed with the fact that Tom and Maddie were explicitly confirmed as Sonic's parents in movie 2 (and combined with the fact that it's not taboo in Eng Sonic media to consider Sonic and Tails as bros or media in general to confirm characters of the same sex as basically adoptive siblings to each other) tells me that those involved in these movies purposely choose to consider these characters family to each other in a way that doesn't conform to nuclear family dynamics and friends to each other as well. In other words, they have had every available opportunity (especially if Sega wanted it or approved it) to confirm this sort of relationship outright (and might I mention that Sonic being given explicit adoptive parents is more big in terms of the past mandates than someone like Tails being a bro (which has been let into eng media on occasion in the past)), and have not done so. They have not given any indication they will do so. And I feel that at this point after showing us good examples of canonically platonic relationships that are important without necessarily being sibling/nuclear family dynamics, it would be a waste to just go "yeah they're siblings" and call it a day, ripping the complexity out of it.
But that's just me.
Right after the clip I just mentioned, we see Team Sonic race each other, with Tom and Maddie starting the race.
Now I've already seen postings about how this shot is confirmation about how Tails and Knuckles are so siblings to Sonic.
Since I have my own post here, I just want to say that at very baseline I think that reasoning is incorrect. This is because the Knuckles series, again, explicitly confirmed Knuckles' home to be with the Whipple family, in contrast to how the beginning hammers in how he doesn't fit in with the Wachowski family or feel quite at home with them. They literally cannot be canonically siblings to each other if they haven't referred to each other this way and if one of the characters involved in the scene doesn't even consider this family in question his home. At best to me the association of this clip and the words about friends and family beforehand implies that Sonic considers these 4 all parts of his family in different ways (again, not necessarily with all 4 fitting into nuclear family dynamics). I don't endeavor to say Sonic sees Knuckles and Tails as siblings to him (in a situation where the feelings aren't exactly the same both ways) because, again, Sonic outright avoids considering them this way, and considers them his friends and roommates explicitly in the first episode of the Knuckles series.
Anyways anyways. I digress. The point of this clip.
At this time I'm thinking either this is a friendly race they've asked Tom and Maddie to intervene for (possible), or this is the start of the journey earlier when we see the trio at different places all over the world. In other words, it's possible they started their separate journeys around the world with a race, intending to beat each other to doing something with a friendly contest.
"Shadow found only pain, and loss"
I know how people have been talking about this set of clips, but at this time I do not believe the fire (aftermath of possible explosion) we see is the original event on the Arc resulting in Maria's death. Yeah, sure, the movie universe isn't 1 to 1 with canon, but I really do not feel like that scene is depicting the arc. This instead reads as a scene to me where Gerald and Shadow are going through a painful moment of loss in the present and being cornered by GUN for capture. It seems more like a scene that occurs partway through the movie as an event that happens rather than a flashback.
Take that with a grain of salt though. That's just my interpretation, and there's not a lot of proof to find to back up any particular one.
We've also heard rumors of time travel being involved, so it's also possible there's a plot bit involving saving Maria and reversing the hurt that way and it tragically failing? Don't know.
Also love the shot of Shadow looking at the cracked glass👌
S sorry just them again looking at each other and Sonic turning to Tails for guidance 🥺🥺💖
This entire mini clip means quite possibly a bit too much to me for a mere trailer but I love their dynamic
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I have talked about it before but damn. Knuckles "He is much more impressive than the hedgehog I fought previously"
We literally see a shot of Shadow revealing himself, and then Knuckles starts talking about how impressive he is.
I know there were a lot of jokes made in the last couple years that Sonic would see Shadow and instantly be enamored, but oh how the turntables! In the end, in this trailer at least, it's actually Knuckles who becomes instantly enamored. One look and he's calling him impressive. One look, and he's already ignoring any direction on Sonic's part to perhaps de-escalate the situation by talking to Shadow, because Knuckles wants to fight Shadow so badly it makes him look stupid.
The way the interaction is done reads to me that Knuckles wants to get a go at tussling with Shadow either more than the stakes of the plan at hand, or would want to despite reality. In other words, even if Shadow "switches sides" so to speak successfully here, Knuckles would still want to fight him for personal reasons.
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Of course right after this we get the subject of a billion jokes about how Shadow hates Tails so much in specific that he goes out of his way to beat him up.
Where is that meme image of the guy looking out the window holding his cigarette, just tired? (Rhetorical question)
I did not think it would be need to said but here.
If you watch the scene, Shadow kicking Tails is not presented as more important or targeted than anything else. First of all, it is within a sequence where we see him take down the members of Team Sonic one by one in a single blow. Second of all, Tails' is actually the least focused on in the trailer. Knuckles punching Shadow only for Shadow to (presumably) break his wrist is shown as a big thing (especially as a call back to the first big clash between Sonic and Knuckles that was advertised a lot for movie 2). Shadow going for Tails is something he literally cuts behind Sonic to do, which quickly segues into him grabbing Sonic and using his air shoes to boost them high into the air so he can slam Sonic down into the ground. Tails being kicked here is presented like something he had to do to get to Sonic, not him going out of his way to beat up Tails. Seriously. How can that even be true when Knuckles and Sonic get flashier and longer beat downs?
Anyways, all that aside, this scene is very neat. It's very clearly to set up the disparity in power between Team Sonic and Shadow the same way it did between Sonic and Knuckles in movie 2, with the framing this time presenting Shadow as a powerhouse unlike anything anyone has ever faced. In other words, combatting Shadow will be more of an ordeal than combatting Knuckles was.
The scene where Tails says "this is a bad idea" and Sonic goes "when has that ever stopped me".
It would be completely fine and dandy if this does turn out to be about the crew looking for Robotnik and deciding to join with him. Personally, I think this is one of those cases where a line from a movie is cut in the trailer to show that it's about something when it really has to do with something else.
Besides the fact that we just don't know when or how everyone will learn Robotnik is alive (since it's pretty well considered by the main characters that he died at the end of movie 2), I think with Tails outright opposing this and Sonic looking angry, this scene is referring to something potentially more risky and dangerous than joining forces with Ivo Robotnik. Depending on how epic the scene is, this could predate a major moment
But I'm excited to see the context regardless of what it turns out to be!
Sorry I know I said it earlier but WHOO fat Robotnik. Hollywood fatphobia aside, I'm honestly glad that Jim Carrey has been winning his battle of moving his character closer visually to Robotnik's canon design.
It's pretty clear by the "we" have visitors that Stone has been with Robotnik taking care of him at some point since the ending of Movie 2. I remember a lot of us assumed the battle in movie 2 did kill Robotnik but that Movie 3 would involve Stone bringing him back somehow. Either way, though I know this was technically dependent on whether Jim Carrey would return to this movie, I do feel vindicated for saying "Robotnik isn't gone for good since we didn't see a body and GUN didn't find one at the end of movie 2".
Agent Stone and his sad wet eyes
So to go into a lot of detail would require a proper essay post, so I'm going to try to make this section as short as possible.
Now, as far as I've gathered since movie 2, Stone's sad wet eyes appear in 1 of 3 instances.
1. When he misses Robonik so so dearly (as seen in the beginning of Movie 2)
2. When he is jealous and fears being replaced by someone else Robotnik chooses to hang out with and go on his missions for the evil plan with (as seen during the scenes where Robotnik has Knuckles with him in the Mean Bean in movie 2)
3. When Robotnik continues to change from the exact kind of slick, collected, confident, and fashionable guy we see in movie 1 in ways which Agent Stone would percieve as him "getting worse" (As seen in movie 2 where Stone sees Robotnik again for the first time, remarking that he looks different, and in the annoyance he gets in movie 2 when Robotnik leaves him out of his plans and continues to include Knuckles rather than consult or use him (Stone))
Now, clearly it is not option 1, given that he is fully aware of Robotnik's location and has clearly been watching over him.
I also do not believe it is number 2, for two reasons.
1. The context clues imply Robotnik has likely only been around Stone all this time. There's no one already living in this space for Stone to be jealous of.
2. We see Stone and his bike blocking the path between Team Sonic and Robotnik, and it's Stone who brings Team Sonic inside to appeal to him. Since it's implied Stone chose to let them in and doesn't seem annoyed when he announces their presence, he does not have the sad wet eyes because he's jealous of their connection to Robotnik in any way.
So this leaves us with option 3: Robotnik is changing further in ways that are messing with Stone, and Stone sees it as Robotnik beginning to "fall from greatness" so to speak.
And I think this interpretation is actually pretty clear. We don't see evidence of a struggle on Stone, so it's unlikely he seriously fought Team Sonic. Rather, it seems to me that they told him they wanted to appeal to Robotnik to get him to help with protecting the world, and they convinced Stone to let them see Robotnik because Stone hopes their involvement (or such a mission) will get Robotnik out of whatever his current rut is (with the state of his hair and stache and the mess in the place he's staying in, it's pretty clear he's in a depressive rut). Stone is sad to see Robotnik this way and hopes Team Sonic can fix it.
We are not actually done with Stone's sad wet eyes though, as he still has them during the scene Robotnik retreats to the bathroom for an outfit change (yes, the scene where he rips off Stone's shirt). It's also worth noting here that Stone still sounds sad during this scene.
So, this is where I take the time to talk MORE about Agent Stone in relation to Ivo Robotnik (but again without going too in detail and doing too much outright essaying). This bit is connected to the previous part, but I wanted to give it its own section since this has to do with my prediction for the future.
My theory? Stone may be set up for an eventual Dr. Starline parallel.
Let me explain a bit.
So, if you don't know who Doctor Starline is, he origates in the IDW Sonic comic adaptation. He is a very intelligent (and fashionable) scientist who holds great admiration for Robotnik, and is obsessed with him. From the beginning he'd put Robotnik on a pedestal and had wanted not only to be like him, but to be vital to him. Starline wanted to be a great help Robotnik to take over the world, and essentially superimposed himself into the position of Robotnik's number 2 (a position comparable to Stone's in the Sonic Movies, Snively in SATAM and the Archie comics, and Grimer's in the Fleetway comics). Over the course of Starline's time together with Robotnik as his self imposed number two, the two start out fairly strong only to clash more and more often as Robotnik expects a lackey who only does what he says, and Starline expects a partner who will listen to his advice. Tensions grow, Starline becomes more disillusioned in the genius and superiority of his hero, and finally, Starline takes it upon himself to be insubordinate. Believing that Eggman's plans are short sighted and destined to fail, he takes it upon himself to "fix things" by going behind Robotnik's back and bringing in the Zeti as (assumed) pawns. It is after this act where Starline decides he needs to save his hero from himself that Eggman tosses him to the side and fires him.
Now, it's worth mentioning that Eggman so easily tosses him aside because there is one thing Starline does not have in common with the other examples of Eggman's number two in other media. This is that they have the advantage of time spent with Eggman, allowing him to become attached to them enough that even smaller acts of insubordination aren't enough for him to fire them completely.
But in any case, Robotnik didn't completely reject Starline after this. He was of the mind that he'd be willing to take Starline back if Starline begged at his feet and apologized. However, since Starline had too much pride, he did not do this. Rather, he begins to believe that Robotnik still is a grand genius, just that he's short sighted and can never take over the world with how he handles the threat of Sonic. So, Starline takes it upon himself to take over the world for Eggman (since he believes he himself is smart enough to do so without falling into Eggman's folly), and then dreams of doing such a good job that it's Eggman who begs to he at his side, since Starline is hung up on Eggman's rejection and wants him to choose him.
So, what does this have to do with Stone?
Well, I have no doubt that Stone was a smart man from the start given his position related to the US gov and that he's been able to perfectly Robotnik's assistant. But you can also take Eggman's word for it as well, courtesy of the prequill comic (which takes place between movies 1 and 2)
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It is also by this very comic that we know that Stone was the only man Robotnik trusted to enact his plans in his absense, and perhaps the only man he had ever shared the secrets of his manifesto.
And it's how we know that Stone undoubtedly undergoes major changes by movie 2 compared to movie 1. Not only does he have it in his mind that he is Robotnik's number 2, a man personally responsible for doing what Robotnik cannot with the mission of personally rebuilding Robotnik's glory, but this entire experience contains the purpose of molding Stone to be more like Robotnik himself.
Stone by movie 2 is more cunning and calculating in the way Robotnik is. He was given a personal mission to rebuild his master's former glory, and he throws his entire self into it. It is not a stretch to assume that Stone is saddened upon meeting Robotnik again in movie 2 because it did not match his expectations.
All in all, especially since he'd given Robotnik the tools for a makeover, I think from Stone's end he was expecting for Robotnik to return to him a man who has gone through an ordeal but maintains his style and greatness (essentially, looking like he did before), as a man of who would congratulate Stone on his work in his absense (praise him even), and take him at his side as they work together to enact Robotnik's world takeover plan.
But Stone's expectations are dashed as Robotnik arrives in a new fit, with a new stache, seemingly more mentally unstable than before (keep in mind, Robotnik's thing in movie 1 was that he was more intelligent and thought differently than everyone else, not that he was unstable. He was the kind of "genius who is written off as unstable but sees what no one else does", but since his involvement with Sonic HAS been seemingly less cool and collected and more unstable), and with a space echidna at his side. In the span of one meeting, Stone had the means to feel replaced and to feel as if Robotnik was falling short of his glory/falling from greatness as he's changed.
And then over the course of movie 2, though there are people who do Movie Ivo character study who'd agree that Robotnik does genuinely care about Stone, just is bad at showing it or doesn’t show it conventionally, it's pretty clear that Stone himself doesn't really see it. He doesn't feel valued. He doesn't even get to be used by Robotnik as he was in movie 1, actively on the road trip with him. Nope. Robotnik leaves him at the Mean Bean most of the movie.
And this is why Stone doesn't seem happy most of the movie. This is why it excites him so that Robotnik accepts him at the end of the movie and makes room for him as a vital helper.
What I assert, in essence, is that after the prequill comic, Stone can no longer just be okay in his role as he was before with little praise/acknowledgement, nor can he even he even take solace in the fact that Robotnik will always keep him around because he needs him.
So here's where the Starline parallel comes in. Now that Stone sees himself as a much more important figure in Robotnik's life, with a mission given to him by a version of Ivo who Stone could possibly see as "at his most sane" to make sure he succeeds and attains his former glory, I think he sees his number two role as less of a guaranteed thing and something he must fight to keep (this means stuff like putting himself out there at the end of movie 2 and begging to go with Robotnik, or taking it upon himself to find Robotnik after the battle and support him). And so, I suspect (especially with those shots we got in the trailer, Stone being sad at presenting Robotnik's current state, his potentially angrier faces as he's finally allowed to groom Robotnik and shave his hair, his continued sadness even as Robotnik has moved out of his rut) that we're going to see Robotnik to continue to take Stone's presence as his "sycophant" for granted, while Stone continues to become disillusioned with his idol and master.
I predict Stone will continue to become so disillusioned with Robotnik due to seeing him as a man falling from greatness and due to lack of acknowledgement and appreciation, that Stone will eventually turn on Robotnik. But not to stop him or to become better than him. No. I predict, Starline style, Stone will take it upon himself to restore Eggman to his former glory, to eventually go behind Eggman's back and enact his own plans, to attempt to take over the world for Robotnik, and to accomplish it all in such an amazing display that Robotnik has to express that he wants him around and to acknowledge him as a partner and to praise him.
At least, that could be the plan/setup. It would remain to be seen how these two characters resolve this event (essentially, in which ways this diverges from the parallel and the two inevitably come back together again). After all, no matter what ends up happening between Stone and Robotnik, I think something will need to give and change eventually, and the two will need to make their feelings/wishes...more clear to each other
But in the end, this is just my theory. I do not yet know how much of this will actually come to pass, but I hope it's food for thought for you all.
By the way, I too love the Stobotnik scenes in this trailer. We are eating good👌👌👌 However, it really is hard not to see that scene where Ivo rips Stone's shirt off as another moment where Stone doesn't feel appreciated. Ivo over here ripping off a man's shirt (gay. Sorry. The people are right when they asked if it was gay for him to just rip it off and then choose to wear it during the movie), and it's entirely possible the man in question thinks that this is proof that Robotnik doesn't think much of him in this state (even if Stone is clearly not going to keep him from doing what he wants here)
"When we're done, there won't be anything left"
Cool, so Shadow is actively planning on destroying the world here. Potentially to satisfy revenge.
Interesting. So the scene with the Chao mascots also looks like an ambush is happening, with Team Sonic specifically being targeted with missiles
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"What did you do?" "What I had to."
Movie Sonic has his classic extremely angry face here too, so Shadow must have done something major. It's either world ending, or it put the lives of his family and friends in HUGE jeopardy (or both).
AND FINALLY. Gerald reveal
I cannot express the surprise I felt here. This scene shows us that Gerald is here in the present, not just a man who died 50 years ago by execution. So, possible time travel shenanigans or not, the fact that he's involved in the present conflict (perhaps with Shadow personally) is highly interesting and I'm excited to see where this goes.
Also, based on the layout of the room here, it's potentially possible that either this is the same room Sonic is searching earlier in the trailer, or that Gerald had multiple lab like living spaces he was jumping between over the years to stay under the radar, and that Team Sonic and Team Robotnik ended up finding Gerald while looking into clues on Shadow
And...done. Whew. Wow. I had a lot of thoughts so uh. I hope my ask satisfied your curiosity, flashonetwo. I also hope for anyone that read this far that you enjoyed it at least a little bit, and that your mind is running with thoughts of your own.
I'm beyond excited for this movie, and I genuinely can't wait to see what happens next. So here's to seeing how much we get right in the future, and here's to enjoying what we get!😊❤️
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mtt-burger-emporium · 1 year ago
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thinking about chara and the implications of the line "chara hated humanity. why, they never said..." like ok i KNOW something was happening at home. chara baby you didn't deserve that shit i'm so glad you fell down a thousand feet in a cave hole and right into the arms of people who would keep you fed roof over your head and would never raise their hand against you. "eradicate humanity" you're 10 years old how about eradicating your shitfucked surface fam by calling cps first
#soda.txt#chara#(ok idk if this will work but LEEEENGTHY discussion of child abuse below)#ok listen hear me out on this- i know the initial interpretation is a sui attempt WHICH I ALSO AGREE WITH- BUT LISTEN#i believe there was something else going on leading to the whole ''eradicate humanity'' bit and the obvious answer is an unsafe homelife#well. at least for me.#being around people (or perhaps adults) who hurt you and make you feel unsafe in a place where you should be welcomed with open arms and-#a promise of care would probably make any child feel like all of humanity was (in simple terms) cruel and uncaring#so hearing about somewhere they could GET AWAY FROM THAT? of course they'd take that opportunity and run.#chara was just lucky enough to fall into a place that pulled them out of the ideology of ''all of humanity is cruel''#because the dreemurrs were kind and patient enough to take them in and give them a new family#and wouldn't anyone want that?#for the part of The Plan (the buttercups) i think.. i think that one was formed by the idea that chara felt obligated to-#pay the dreemurrs back for their kindness. not that the dreemurrs would have made them. just by their own mental code.#what better way to pay a kind family back- one that took you in and cared for you like one of their own- then by forming a plan to-#set their people free?#they've been stuck down there for so long. they've wanted to feel the sun for SO LONG. why not give yourself up to grant that dream?#idk if these thoughts are coherent. LOL sorry i kinda just started saying words huh#but its ok.#feel free to ask me questions ab my interp of chara btw teehee ^_^ i love talking about chara they're my favorite theyre so silly#ok now for the proper tags on this bitch#chara undertale#chara dreemurr#child abuse mention#suicide mention#tw child abuse#safeutdr#OH ANALYSIS TAG UHHH UMM#🧪lab notes
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altruistic-meme · 11 months ago
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if you could... describe aftg in 5 words
oh this is not as easy a question to answer as it should be akfhsdkf bc like. i could describe its plot, or my thoughts on it as a fan, or how it makes me feel, or just make a joke, or or or and bc idk why you're asking it makes it harder :'))
but let's see...
plot: gay sports mafia found family.
fan: drama, familiarity, trauma, comedy, home
feelings: love, understanding, chaos, joy, comfort
joke: you know, i get it-
(as you can see, i couldn't pick which one to go with, so choose whichever 5 words you want lmao)
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cherryblossom-heart · 2 days ago
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Responsibilities (5/?)
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bestfriend!Nanami x Reader (SMAU)
Masterlist
A work party with Nanami shouldn't be too much of a hassle, right?
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 6
Content warning: brief discussion of sex, like almost nothing but still. Also idiots in love.
A/N: Hi besties! We continue with our favorite idiots in love and their shannenigans. . You're welcomed to send me an ask with any comments, questions, etc., you have on this. 😊
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If you like the story please interact: reblogs, likes and comments go a long way. Feedback is always appreciated! Feel free to message me about it.
Taglist
@ermbehindyou @totallygyomeiswife @ash4ree @lov3vivian @namjooningera @sleepykittyenergy @silllly-jokesterr @shigarika @7haze @lizzie3d2y @jaybirdluvr73 @sweetdreams-inumimi @anuncalledbridge @troyesivanfrl @lavenderdaydream97 @n4tr3ad5 @aldebrana
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beaft · 10 months ago
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you have an isekai story? can i read it somewhere?
one day, i hope! i'm currently attempting to get it trad-published, but if i don't have any success i'll self-publish. i've only been avoiding the self-publishing route thus far because you have to do so much of your own marketing and i'm pants at that.
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hauntedaugust · 2 years ago
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Character x gn! Reader
WC: 245
Summary: angsty soulmate au for ??someone?? Presumably a more closed off character or someone with a tragic backstory.
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Wrapped thrice around my throat is a red string of fate.
It is tangled in my fingers and binding my feet.
And it is cutting off my air.
I have cut and sawed and axed, burned and buried, yet it has never even frayed.
I have gotten used to waking up in the early morning suffocating and stuttering for breath.
I have come to accept that this fate will kill me and that whoever is on the other side would rather lose their life than love me.
And they don’t even know my name.
I’ve come to enjoy the sunrise, one of the only good aspects of waking from one nightmare into another. But if I'm honest I prefer the mornings before the sun breaks the horizon, the red doesn't stand out as much when it's not bathed in warm light.
Some days I wonder what the world thinks of me as they watch me trip over this tangled mess of mistakes.
They are obsequious to their fate, following both fervently and blind. And they make a point to turn their shoulder to those who clash with their ideals.
The world has no place for those without soulmates, whether they are alone by choice, or otherwise.
So every morning I wake I must decide what to do with this tangled, twisted, and wholly reprehensible trick of divine interference.
Whether I run against this hedonic treadmill of tragedy or if I simply succumb to my fate.
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anipgarden · 12 days ago
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Some of you may have heard about Monarch butterflies being added to the Threatened species list in the US and be planning to immediately rush out in spring and buy all the milkweed you can manage to do your part and help the species.
And that's fantastic!! Starting a pollinator garden and/or encouraging people and businesses around you to do the same is an excellent way to help not just Monarchs but many other threatened and at-risk pollinator species!
However.
Please please PLEASE do not obtain Tropical Milkweed for this purpose!
Tropical milkweed (Asclepias curassavica)--also commonly known as bloodflower, Mexican butterflyweed, and scarlet milkweed--will likely be the first species of milkweed you find for sale at most nurseries. It'll be fairly cheap, too, and it grows and propagates so easily you'll just want to grab it! But do not do that!
Tropical milkweed can cause a host of issues that can ultimately harm the butterflies you're trying to help, such as--
Harboring a protozoan parasite called OE (which has been linked to lower migration success, reductions in body mass, lifespan, mating success, and flight ability) for long periods of time
Remaining alive for longer periods, encouraging breeding during migration time/overwintering time as well as keeping monarchs in an area until a hard freeze wherein which they die
Actually becoming toxic to monarch caterpillars when exposed to warmer temperatures associated with climate change
However--do not be discouraged!! There are over 100 species of milkweed native to the United States, and plenty of resources on which are native to your state specifically! From there, you can find the nurseries dedicated to selling native milkweeds, or buy/trade for/collect seeds to grow them yourself!!
The world of native milkweeds is vast and enchanting, and I'm sure you'll soon find a favorite species native to your area that suits your growing space! There's tons of amazing options--whether you choose the beautiful pink vanilla-smelling swamp milkweed, the sophisticated redring milkweed, the elusive purple milkweed, the alluring green antelopehorn milkweed, or the charming heartleaf milkweed, or even something I didn't list!
And there's tons of resources and lots of people willing to help you on your native milkweed journey! Like me! Feel free to shoot me an ask if you have any questions!
Just. PLEASE. Leave the tropical milkweed alone. Stay away.
TLDR: Start a pollinator garden to help the monarchs! Just don't plant tropical milkweed. There's hundreds of other milkweeds to grow instead!
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sophiamcdougall · 1 year ago
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I am never going to complain about Greek Duolingo again
I mean, I am. But still.
So, as some of you know, my family has been coming to this tiny Greek seaside village for several years. Just over a week ago I came out here with my mum, under the impression that early September, after the height of the summer heat, would be a good time to have a holiday. ANYWAY Storm Daniel had other ideas about that. Locally things are improving (I'm actually really pissed off about the disaster-porn tone of most English-language media coverage, but that's another post). The power is back on, there's running water most of the time, and though the latter is not drinkable, a truck from the government came and handled out free bottled water yesterday. But we are currently kind of stuck. Can't do tourist things. Can't go home. There aren't any local flights out until Saturday and the road to Thessaloniki is still closed.
So this evening, feeling kind of aimless and depressed, I go down to the nearest beach with a couple of binbags and start cleaning up in an effort to at least do something positive. I always try to do this at least once out here and obviously, after the storm, there's a lot more plastic and rubbish than usual.
At some point I find this large, round bit of metal - some kind of machinery part, I think -- that's too big for the bag, so I take it to the bins on its own, leaving the rubbish bag on the beach. And when I come back for it, something among the stones beside it moves.
Specifically, it pulls its head sharply inside its shell
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So, meanwhile I've been trying to learn some Greek with the help of Duolingo.
I currently have a 33-day streak and... I have questions. Shouldn't I be able to use the past or future tenses by now? Shouldn't I be able to say "x is like y"? I can't do those things. But one thing I absolutely can say all day long is έχω μια χελώνα : I have a turtle.
This is far from the limit of Duolingo Greek's turtle-related content. "An obsession with turtles" is my mother's characterisation. I can inform you that the turtle is not a bird, and, improbably, that the turtle is drinking milk. I can introduce you to a turtle in company with a horse and an elephant. As far as Duolingo is concerned, it really is turtles all the way down.
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Now this, you may be able to see, is not a turtle. It has claws rather than flippers. It is a tortoise. I know there are wild tortoises in Greece: my aunt once rescued a pair of them shagging in the middle of the road -- but that was up in the mountains. I've even seen one myself, but it was also on a road and very dead.
I am 95% certain they don't belong on beaches. There's nothing for it to eat, except, unfortunately, a lot of plastic. Even if it gets off the beach it will immediately find itself on a road where it could get hit by a car. I'm pretty sure it must have been washed down by the floodwater and has been just sitting there, dazed, ever since.
Now obviously the first thing I want to do on encountering this unusual animal is to go and tell my mummy, so I do. The tortoise immediately brightens her day. She agrees that the tortoise is not happy on the beach and needs to be taken somewhere safe. it gets surprisingly wriggly when picked up so we put it in a carrier bag with some grapes and cucumber and go looking for somewhere to rehome it.
We find a path leading up between the houses towards a likely-looking field, but before we get very far a dog in a yard goes berserk and a man's head pops over a fence and demands to know what we're doing. He does this in English, as evidently we're just that obviously tourists.
"I found a tortoise on the beach!" I explain. "We want to find somewhere to put it."
"A what," he asks.
"It's like a, you know," I begin and then to my astonishment I find myself saying... "μια χελώνα"
"Oh! A turtle!" he says.
"But from the land. δεν είναι χελώνα", [it is not a turtle,] I say, as I am worried he will tell me to put it back near the sea where I found it. As it turns out it actually IS a χελώνα, Greek does not distinguish between turtles and tortoises, but I don't know that; I can't even name the days of the week or identify any colours other than pink yet, give me a break.
The man's entire demeanour changes and thaws. He does not worry about my turtle-that-is-not-a-turtle conundrum. He knows where οι χελώνες come from and where η χελώνα μας belongs. He leads us through a gate into a courtyard area.
"[somethingsomething] μια χελώνα," he explains to the assembled onlookers, of whom there are, suddenly, a surprising number.
"ΜΙΑ ΧΕΛΩΝΑ!!!" crows the throng of delighted small children, who are, suddenly, everywhere.
"μια χελώνα!" I agree, accepting that at least for current purposes, that is what it is.
"Μπορούμε να δούμε τη χελώνα σας; [can we see your turtle?]" asks an adorable little girl, shyly, and I understand??
The children fucking love looking at the χελώνα and showing it to them is kind of magical?
I finally put the tortoise down on the grass of this wild area off to the side of the courtyard, and marvel aloud that it is weird that I barely know any Greek except how to say μια χελώνα.
"I think she will soon run off," a kind lady called Aspasia assures me, seeing I remain slightly anxious about its fate. "I don't know why I'm saying 'she'. I suppose because χελώνα is feminine in Greek."
"Yes! I know that!" I exclaim, thrilled.
"Well done!" she says. And also she asks if we are OK for drinking water after the storm and if we need any help with anything and is just generally incredibly lovely and now we know more of the neighbours!
So "μια χελώνα" has just become, by a long way, my most-used and most understood and all-around most conversationally successful phrase in Greek. So I guess I have to admit I was wrong to doubt Duolingo's wisdom: it is correct to be obsessed with turtles. And I concede that prior to learning how to count to ten or to distinguish right from left, the simple ability to yell the word TURTLE over and over again is, it turns out, a crucial element of the responsible traveller's social skills.
(I am pretty fluent in Italian and turtles haven't come up in conversation even once?)
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