#also feel free everyone to send me m:i opinions or predictions or whatever

[andrewknightley]

OKAY WAIT SPEAKING OF M:I 8 PREDICTIONS. i have money on like. if the entity or whatever name the ai has needs some sort of avatar to represent itself it's gonna keep using benji like it was stealing info abt him with the fake bomb and did the whole "you are done/dunn" thing to ethan in his voice and idk. i want to see simon pegg play a villain. a boy can dream

LOOK IF THE ENTITY WANTS TO KEEP USING BENJI'S VOICE TO MANIPULATE PEOPLE AND BE EVIL IM ALL UP FOR IT 0 COMPLAINS I SUPPORT THIS VERY MUCH

I also love when charas invent lil passwords and stuff to not get tricked by copies of themselves and all the shenanigans that can ensue from that

But also if you wanna see Simon play a villain he has done it it some stuff!! Mostly are Surprise Villain in bad movies tho but i heard he plays a baddie in Doctor Who and i assume its nice to watch (i still have to find wich ones are his episode or episodes)

[satanswrathussy]

mystic messenger playthrough part two 😎

don't feel obligated to read this i just need to dump my thoughts and theories- i'm currently on day 4

TL;DR i flip flop on who i find suspicious SO easily, yoosung needs therapy, and i am in love with jaehee kang.

Outside of the Game-

So originally I was doing this blind, like genuinely 100% blind- but with the frequent reappearance of Elizabeth the 3rd I was REALLY nervous about anything happening to her, so I decided to look up trigger warnings for the game (via doesthedogdie.com which is a GOD SEND) ..and although it was TECHNICALLY spoiler free since it didn't go into specifics... the trigger warnings I saw suddenly make me feel like I'm getting ddlc'd in a way? Not really "oh one of the characters is actually sentient and actively changing the code!" but like "oh you thought this was a cute dating sim? lolol get wrecked emotionally dipshit."

ALSO I DISCOVERED THERE ARE FUCKING BAD ENDS?????,, WHICH BY BAD ENDS ARE WE TALKING LIKE "Aw nuts! You failed the RFA and now they all don't like you, and you have no lover!" OR LIKE "You have invoked the wrath of Zen's deranged fans and they murdered you- You pissed off Jumin and now he's paying to have you disposed of-" LIKE I NEED TO KNOW THE EXTENT OF "BAD" WE'RE TALKING ABOUT??

In the Game -

Originally I thought Yoosung was onto something about V... but then in Day 4 at 10:00 there was a chat called 'Blame', and I think Yoosung is losing it...? I was totally ready to jump on the anti-V train at first dude- like if Yoosung had said "let's overthrow V as the leader!" I would've been SO excited... but somewhere during the chat I just kinda felt like ... I don't know ... V seemed to be kinda defeated rather than combative? Which I KNOWWW its text based and there's no tone indicators, but shhhhh its my thought dump so I get to project whatever emotions I want onto V. Hopefully this isn't a dumb choice, but I trust V more now? Also Yoosung mentioned how V only ever talks to Seven about confidential things, and he was pretty upset about it. Maybe if this happened sooner I would've been more on Yoosung's side, but Yoosung just ... doesn't seem to be the best person to tell confidential information??? And so far Seven seems like the best person to tell???

Anyways my brain is focused on Yoosung vs V right now, but I actually have more thoughts aside from that lol.

I looked at a beginner's guide for the game, and I discovered I should only be focusing on ONE person to get hearts, and not just being nice all around. Which I decided the SECOND I saw there was a woman in the game, I wanted to go through Jaehee's route first bc ... women 😩❤️ and I think I'm on track?

I don't know if there's a way to check my affection levels, but if I had to guess- i think my current order is

Jaehee Kang

Yoosung

Zen

707

V

Jumin

After I learned I needed to focus on one person (and that it should be Jaehee, Zen or Yoosung iirc), I started being less supportive towards Yoosung and Zen to knock their affection down .... I had a black broken heart animation play at one point because I think I took Jaehee's side over Yoosung? Or maybe it was Zen's... either way i feel like a horrible person

Predictions

Not technically story related, but I predict I'm gonna get Jaehee's good end first, or neutral end if that's a thing? Listen I'm just not going to acknowledge the possibility that I can get a bad ending.

If I get a bad ending, I bet it's gonna be Yoosung's fault for being all suspicious of V or Jumin's fault because I'm trying to rescue steal his assistant.

I WANT JAEHEE TO START LIKING ELIZABETH THE 3RD SO BAD. why are all the opinions on cats in this game SO strong- why can't they be indifferent to cats? either they're obsessed or they have an over the top hatred for them ...

Theories

I'm definitely leaning more towards "V is just misunderstood" and "He's hiding something to protect everyone else" instead of him having some crazy ulterior motive

Seven kindaaaa gives me bad vibes..? Idk he reminds me too much of certain boys from high school lmao, but I don't know if he's gonna be a problem for me/MC ... I'm leaning more towards him being a red herring

Yoosung is declining mental health wise bc MC is lowkey replacing Rika?? Since he seems to like MC, he decided to blame all of it on V instead of MC- which furthers his suspicion that V got over Rika way too easily

V definitely did not get over Rika way too easily, and I doubt he got over her at all

I STILL DONT THINK RIKA'S DEAD I SMELL A STUNT

anyways that concludes todays ramblings on this game I'm 7 years late on playing !!

i am now downloading mystic messenger bc i saw someone mention it once while talking about obey me!

which i've heard the name mystic messenger before, but i don't rlly know what it is? 😭 i'm just assuming it's vaguely similar soooooo- wish me luck 😎

[detective-crescend]

break up with your girlfriend (i’m bored)

There is a game that Klavier Gavin sometimes likes to play.

‘Likes’, however, may not be the appropriate term.

It isn’t a nice game, or one that makes him feel like a particularly good and decent person. And yet, when he wins—which he almost certainly does, on all but two notable occasions—the rush of chemicals that his victory incites within his clearly damaged mind will cover up all but the most persistent cries of outrage from what remains of his decaying moral compass.

It is a private challenge, it is a weakness he has long since conceded to… it is played like this:

There are plenty of people in the world who would love Klavier Gavin simply for what he represents. Conversely, there are people who will despise him for those very same reasons.

When the small voice in the back of his mind begins to speak too loudly—the one that sounds so very familiar, calm and leveled while it interrogates his every action—when he, in turn, begins to doubt himself, Klavier will search out the nearest member of the latter group. The more this individual seemingly dislikes him, the better the effect. And, having identified someone who must dislike Klavier more than he dislikes himself, he will do whatever is necessary to change that person’s opinion.

Sometimes it is as simple as attention and kindness, gifts and persistence; sometimes it is through a display of vulnerability or chagrin that is only somewhat manufactured for the moment. Though Klavier’s motivation for doing so is horrifically selfish, the goal is to be perfectly genuine in his search for their affection. It needs to be; only once his target has offered up their adoration can he tolerate himself once more. If it is a false version of Klavier that they are idolizing, it only strengthens the voice’s position inside his own mind.

The point of this game is emotional intimacy, not physical. Klavier has never been in the game of intentionally breaking hearts. One of the cardinal rules that he has set for himself, then, is that his appointed convert must be maintained as a friend, not a lover. In actuality, the majority of the rules pertain to limits and boundaries—monetary, time, distance, and attitude—or to create clear definitions of what constitutes a win or a loss of the game. It is important, Klavier feels, to keep things consistent among matches and, therefore, fair.

But, although Klavier has flourished in this diversion since his now distant childhood, he had also never encountered a contender quite like Apollo Justice before.

It wasn’t that Apollo was particularly difficult to read or to predict what it might take in order to shift his perception—on the contrary, Klavier had known exactly what needed to be done to achieve his goal almost immediately upon meeting the man. Whether or not Klavier is capable of it, however, is where the debate hinges.

There are rules that will need to be broken, for one thing, along with a set of small, concealed truths that must be unearthed—things that Klavier had long since been in the habit of burying below several layers of his own psyche. As of this moment, there are only two that Klavier has managed to excavate and examine with any sense of composure.

The first, that Apollo has beaten him so thoroughly in Klavier’s own game that their exchanges have ceased to be a game at all. Instead, they have taken on the frantic and impetuous nature of an entirely different emotion. Klavier’s desire to win Apollo’s affection had ceased to be a simple desire; it now felt like a need, pulsing bright and warm from somewhere so deeply within him that he had long since stopped believing it was possible to feel this way at all.

The second truth—both far more recently understood and infinitely more frightening—is that the aforementioned need may, in fact, be love.

It is not as pleasant an emotion as he had once anticipated, more like gnawing hunger that rumbled when Apollo was absent and roared with an open maw when he was nearby. It made Klavier indecisive and introspective in an entirely different way than the voice in his head, made him overthink every word he spoke and every thing he did when Apollo was nearby. It made him impulsive and greedy, wont to push his luck at every opportunity he could possibly take.

And, as luck would have it, this emotion was ruining any chance he could have with Apollo in the process.

“I am performing at a local studio tomorrow,” Klavier is attempting to begin one afternoon, in the immediate aftermath of a trial he has just lost. Though he’d meant the words to sound suave and unintentionally cool, the force of Apollo’s indifferent gaze strangles the words into an awkwardly insistent rush. “Would you like to come, as my guest? You may bring Fräulein Wright as well.”

Before him, Apollo’s dark eyes narrow, his hands still in the process of packing up the strewn remainder of his courtroom notes. “What kind of performance?”

“It is for a streaming service, ja?” Klavier replies, grinning through the nerve induced flips his stomach has been performing since the moment he opened his mouth. “They invite artists to come for an interview and to cover a song of the audience’s choice. There is usually free food and drinks.”

“So no Gavinner’s music?” Apollo looks skeptical.

“Nein, I promise.”

Another moment of cautious consideration is given before Apollo eventually, reluctantly, nods. “Trucy’ll kill me if she finds out I said no. Text me the address and time.”

Of course, it isn’t until hours after the requested message had been sent that Klavier thinks to check the status of the polls online that will decide the theme of his performance. One glance is all it takes to know that his invitation could be nothing but an absolutely terrible idea.

The damage, however, had been done.

As such, Klavier wakes the next morning with his emotions an odd amalgam of dread and anticipation that carries through the remainder of his day. By his arrival at the indicated studio—far earlier than the time he had provided to Apollo due to the ever-necessary addition of hair and makeup—Klavier is certain he has thought of nothing else the entire day other than Apollo’s arrival.

“Trucy couldn’t come,” Apollo says later, looking exceedingly uncomfortable in clothes other than his courtroom ensemble. It is the first time since the Guilty as Charged concert that Klavier has seen him in anything so casual; he had forgotten that, in the absence of hair gel and when wearing something that is not a shocking scarlet in hue, Apollo looks good. Good enough that Klavier is far from the only one casting surreptitious looks as they walk together from the lobby to the studio.

Those small glances are enough to send his imagination into a tailspin that, consequently, causes his response to be just moments too late to sound entirely casual. “But you still came.”

“I already said I would,” Apollo replies, ignoring the delay with a dismissive shrug. “It would’ve been rude to bail at the last second. Anyway, Trucy made me promise I’d record your song. When is it, by the way?”

“Twenty minutes—I won’t keep you for too long, ja?”

The problem is, during a performance, Klavier is practically incapable of any sort of critical thought at all. Years of practice have led to a near Pavlovian response to the appearance of a camera in his face; at just the glint of a lense reflection, any doubts or worries he had previously been wrestling with will be delicately tucked away to make room for the public persona Klavier presents to the world.

The same thing happens, here. Within moments of the interview starting, Klavier forgets about his apprehension in having Apollo present for this performance. By the time he eventually starts to sing, he’s forgotten about Apollo sitting just beyond the camera in a plastic folding chair all together.

The song picked for him to sing is almost certainly a joke, intentionally selected due to his recent and rather outspoken declaration of bisexuality. But Klavier has never been one to back down from a challenge or to let anyone know they’ve gotten under his skin. His take on Ariana Grande’s morally bankrupt classic is stripped down and irrevocably smoky, just the sound of Klavier’s voice and an electric guitar with absolutely zero changes to the lyrics, as was expected.

Klavier is not singing to Apollo, precisely—as far as he is aware, Apollo does not have a girlfriend from which to break up with—but a song will always sound better with some sort of emotion attached to it. Klavier has long been in the habit of searching any lyrics that are not his own for a handhold that he can grab on to relate to; here, the idea of wanting someone unavailable, no matter the cause, is an easy enough choice.

And things go seamlessly for the majority of the song. It isn't until nearly two minutes in, just as Klavier is finishing the bridge, that his gaze slips past the camera he has just recently glanced up into, and finds Apollo’s eyes wide and locked upon his. Perhaps it is not entirely professional, to maintain uninterrupted eye contact with the opposing counsel as the lyrics “you can hit it in the morning like it’s yours” are murmured seductively into the microphone bent towards one’s face. The suspicion is confirmed when, thirty seconds later, the song’s end is met by an uproar of applause from everyone except Apollo, who stands and leaves the room altogether.

“Stop messing with me,” Apollo shouts in the parking lot when Klavier has finally caught up with him. “I don’t know what you’re trying to do, I don’t know what sort of advantage you think you’re playing at, but stop.”

[burnedbyshoto]

Toyomitsu Taishiro (Fatgum) - HC

a/n: so I realized just how indepth these things really are, so scheduling I had is a joke, but whateva! happy four months lovlies :D

SFW:

A = Affection (How affectionate are they with an s/o?)

HE IS A BIG PHAT LIVING TEDDY BEAR DO YOU UNDERSTAND??? HE IS AS AFFECTIONATE AS YOU WILL LET HIM BE!!!!!!!!

B = Breath (What could their s/o do to take their breath away?)

If you, his s/o, ever learned how to make takoyaki. You don’t even have to be an amazing chef, this small act of cooking his favorite food will make him worship the ground you stand on (as if he wasn’t already doing that!)

C = Cuddling (Do they cuddle? If they do, how and when do they cuddle?)

You know those huge fluffy stuffed animals you wanted as a kid and you’d just lay on top of their big poofy stomach and just hold on because you were living the life??? That’s cuddling with Taishiro and you can’t convince me otherwise. Also, he loves it when you do it??? It just makes him feel super amazing???

D = Dream (What do they dream of doing with their s/o?)

He would love to open a poor kitchen with you. The two of you are that couple that everyone respects because of how kind and generous you are, and this kitchen would mean so much to those in the community that needs it.

E = Effort (How much effort do they put into a relationship?)

He’s very busy as a hero, and most nights he is very tired, but he will always dedicate his free day to you. Of course, it’s surrounded with errands, but just being with you is enough. He puts as much effort into his relationship with you as he can.

F = Fear (What do they do if their s/o is scared? How do they handle it?)

He will give you his hero hoodie. The soft and warm extremely large fabric of the jacket drowns you, but also makes you feel safe. He’ll wait for you to want his physical help, but for now, take the hoodie.

G = Gifts (What type of gifts do they give their s/o? Do they want a gift in return?)

Taishiro is the boyfriend who buys the rose from the local flower shop and brings it back with him on his way home. He gives you little gifts that make you smile, not really into really big and extravagant gifts unless the occasion calls for it. He enjoys the small things because you remember them just as well. He never expects a gift back and is genuinely shocked whenever you bring something home for him.

H = Hugs (Do they hug their s/o? How often?)

He is a big hugger. He will hug you more than kiss you, not even going to lie about it, but you enjoy it. Taishiro is an amazing hugger and it makes you feel safe, soft and warm.

I = Intimacy (How romantic are they? Do they have problems with intimacy?)

He is a huge romantic and is never ever afraid to demonstrate that to you or anyone. Never misses an important date, always texts you happy anniversary! Even month 18 he will send a heartwarming message as if it was a huge one!

J = Jealous (Do they get jealous? How do they act when jealous?)

He’s a bit of a jealous man because you are amazing. Of course, this jealousy doesn’t drive him to do anything, but he knows that many men scoff at him because he is in his large form! But he never fights anyone unless provoked into a fight; instead, he just glares at them which is super scary because he’s typically such an easygoing man.

K = Kiss (Are they a good kisser? Do they like to kiss? How often do they try to kiss you?)

He is a good kisser!!! His lips are never chapped, and he loves peppering kisses all over your face!!!!!!! He loves kissing you and will kiss you as often as you want him too.

L = Love (When do they say they love you? How often do they say it? Do they prefer to say or show it?)

He says “i love you” at a year. He fells it well before, but he felt that those words hold a lot of meaning, and he wants to express these genuine feelings to you at a special moment in your relationship because you mean the world to him. Afterward, he will continue saying it every day. If he had to choose between expressing it or saying, he would always show it.

M = Marriage (Do they want to get married? If so, what kind of ceremony?)

He wants to marry you, for sure! The ceremony would be small and intimate with only people the two of you love going!

N = Night out (What type of dates do they like to go on? How often do they like to go on them?)

You two visit a lot of restaurants together! Cooking classes!!!! Weekend trips to some taste-testing place!!!! wALKS THROUGH THE COMMUNITY?!?!?!!? They happen every week.

O = Out of the Ordinary (What’s something they don’t normally do with/for their s/o?)

He will not change his form for you. If you prefer FitGum over him, he won’t ever change himself.

P =Playful (Are they playful in a relationship? If so, how do they play around/mess with their s/o?)

He’s actually a very serious lover. Don’t let the wide grin and pleasant personality fool you. He is very very serious, that’s not to say he won’t play around with you or not joke around, but he likes being as straightforward and clear as he can be.

Q = Questions (Do they ask their s/o their opinion on things? Do they share theirs?)

He will ask for your opinion on things, he wants to hear your thoughts because he respects your input and ideas. He is also a very open and honest person; he shares his opinions even if they contradict your own.

R = Random (How spontaneous is their relationship? Do they do things on the spot or plan ahead?)

He’s not predictable but also not spontaneous. Like, you expect things from him because he’s a very routine guy, but he still manages to make every single routine something new for you.

S = Sleep (How do they sleep with their s/o?)

You can sleep on top of his belly, he loves it and he doesn’t move in his sleep so it works out! It also makes sharing the blankets easy!

T = Trust (How much do they trust their s/o?)

Taishiro trusts you completely. He never doubts what you say, and even if he thinks you’re lying he trusts you’ll come around and tell him the truth eventually.

U = Unique (What makes them unique as an s/o?)

His compliments. I know, compliments aren’t special or anything new, but there’s something so strangely different, so warming about the way he compliments you. It strikes your soul and warms you up whenever he praises you. You may not have a praise kink, but maybe you do now.

V = Vulnerable (How long until they can be vulnerable around their s/o? What are they like in this state?)

Taishiro actually really really hates being vulnerable in front of you. As a hero, he thinks that it isn’t correct for him to be breaking at the seams. But, when he has to be, it can be at any point because hero work is so fucking exhausting… he’s just… sad. The smile on his face is shakey, his appetite is gone, he’s a shell of who he is, and you both don’t like it.

W = Wild Card (Get a random domestic headcanon of the character of your choice)

Taishiro and you have a long-running game of throwing food into each other’s mouths in the most creative ways possible. The best one so far was when he threw a takoyaki from his stomach hundreds of meters into the sky and you caught it. LEGENDS ONLY!!!!

X = X-Ray (What would they do if their s/o got injured?)

He will cater to you without even blinking an eye. Taishiro will overfeed you because you need the energy to heal! He will giVE YOU HIS JACKET AND I JUST REALLY WANT TO WEAR IT OKAY

Y = Yuck (Do they have any pet peeves about their s/o? Are there any habits that might bother their s/o?)

Super picky eaters. Now now, i know there are picky eaters out there, but i’m talking about picky eaters who won’t let him try any new foods. No, he does not care if you only want chicken tenders for the rest of your life, but if you won’t let him try a new restaurant because they don’t have anything it does bug him.

Z = Zeal (Are they passionate as an s/o? Do they want or like passion?)

He is a super intimate and passionate lover!!! He will try his best with what he has to give to you, and he loves it when you return it to him on every level.

NSFW:

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

He lays there for a while, trying to capture his breath again. When he gets up, he always makes the two of you tea, and he returns with some food and whatever you need.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite feature is his legs, they’re just super strong and goddamn do you look hot as fuck when you’re sitting on his lap. His favorite body part on you is your mouth. Your pretty little mouth that can suck him off, kiss him like no one else, and whisper the most sinful things in his ear… yeah, he loves your mouth.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

His cum is… a weird taste. He has a good appetite, but he does sometimes eat questionable things, and it… is evident. But he loves watching you swallow his thin yet full load.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He has kept a pair of your candy panties that he didn’t get to finish and ate it in public one day because he was able to pass it off as a candy bracelet… you don’t know that though...

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

He is actually not that experienced... unfortunately most people see his fat form and scoff at him because of that, even if he is a kind man. Having sex with these women was especially hard, and since he was busy for a long time he never let it bother him, but he was sort of a natural. He knows how to move his body.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

The standing pretzel (this one is fucking amazing btw) and loves fucking you when you’re on a swing.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He is more serious in bed, but will always be smiling. It’s passionate and meaningful to him, so he tries to avoid joking around. But if you’re into it, he doesn’t mind. 

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

It’s surprising very well-groomed. Almost to the point where it’s shaved off completely. (it’s for less friction with his hero costume)

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

Loves to be super intimate and romantic. He is the kind of guy to hide flowers in the room and present them to you after fucking when you’re about to pass out.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

He doesn’t masturbate often. When he does, it happens more typically in the shower because he thinks you can’t hear him… you can… every time

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

FOOD PLAY FOOD PLAY FOOD PLAY!!!! Hairpulling, thigh-riding, overstimulating (giving), and blindfolds

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

In his office… oh my god, he loves bending you over his desk and making you come whenever you visit for lunch or something

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

You. in. a. candy. bra. and. panties. Also, just sending him a very small thirst text/provocative picture is gonna get you some Daddygum dick.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

Anything with humiliation. Do not ask him to be FitGum for bed, he literally will ignore you for the rest of the week. There are times he comes back with his low BMI so if you want to seduce that very tired and drained hero, be his guest, but never ever ask for it.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Loves giving it more. But goddamn you just look so fucking delicious going down on him that he doesn’t mind when you beat him to oral.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Isn’t too slow isn’t too fast. It’s why sex with him is so exhausting because you’ll come twice in ten minutes but it’s such a painful yet pleasurable ten minutes.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Not into quickies unless he’s in the office, then, by all means, let’s make each other come in 3 minutes.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

He is into experimenting as long as the two of you take it slow while introducing it into the bedroom. Like, don’t dial it up to 15 until you both are comfortable.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

He can last a few healthy rounds but nothing more than four rounds in one night.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He owns a fair share of toys that he much would rather use on you. Like he bought you a vibrator that does it’s job fucking right.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Will never ever say he likes to tease, but he’s a natural fucking tease and just isn’t aware. He will be fucking you at such a slow pace, his words teasing promises as he makes sure you can’t fuck him any faster. He’s a goddamn tease okay.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He’s quite vocal. He thinks words are very powerful and so will make sure he praises your every damn move if he must.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Really really really fucking loves being called hero in bed. He takes so much pride in his work that hearing it being slipped from your mouth… big phat nut.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

He’s a big dick daddy. There’s no way he isn’t. Like nine inches with a considerable girth to it. Not veiny though, pinker than the rest of his body, and has a leftward curve.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He has a good sex drive… oh yeah, he can push himself to stay up every night to fuck you if needed.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

Having sex really reenergizes him! He will definitely go finish up with last minute things afterward if you don’t fall asleep/want to cuddle.

[helpingmehelpmyself]

So my night has ended in shit. I made the reoccurring mistake of trying to have an adult conversation with my mother about how certain things she does affects me and makes me feel bad. This is a mistake I keep making, hoping that our relationship improves. What really happens is her feeling attacked and yelling at me which makes me want to cry and not share my feelings with her. But then later I forget the absolute shit I feel like and she repeats behavior or I notice I'm bottling up a negative emotion and I repeat the process of trying to have an adult conversation.

Today was my graduation photos which have been planned by my mom for a few weeks now. Mom did the planning, I didn't know what was to happen or any changes that had been made. I mentioned to my boyfriend that I'll have my photos taken and he asks if he should dress up. I'm thinking this is only going to be a small family thing so I say no. We still decided to have Dutch Bros before the photoshoot together and he decided to help with the photoshoot. I mentioned to my brother last week that I was getting my hair done for this and he mentioned he'd be there. I asked mom about it in which she said that is the same weekend we'd have my niece so yes and then she pulls out a dress for my niece. (My brother also decided that was his way of telling mom he'd be there which we hate when he does that because we don't talk to each other like that.) My dad calls me a few days ago needing a ride to the area, which isn't uncommon. I said "oh, what are you coming here for?" And he says the photoshoot. First time I hear of him. So to both of those times, I said I know nothing about the operation of the photoshoot.

Photoshoot comes today and everyone is in the house getting ready. Brother's girlfriend/niece's mother is there doing mom's makeup and changes into a dress for the photoshoot. My cousin drives my dad to the house and ends up sticking around helping with the shoot (not in it). We arrive to the university for photos and my dad and cousin are just like "why is your boyfriend not dressed?" I tell them because it was never mentioned that he'd be in the photos (I didn't even think he'd be helping with the photos). They continue to tell me I should have assumed because we are dating and that I really had no excuse for preparing him. So I send him home to change. I feel like shit because I continue to feel like there is a theory by other people that because my boyfriend is soft spoken and always ready to make me happy that he's the god given saint and I'm just this chaotic chick who was lucky to find someone to deal with and that she probably walks over (previous comments made before and during this relationship kinda make me feel like that's everyone's theory). So I feel like a shit as girlfriend in front of my family and when I explain to them I don't assume when it comes to mom because it leads to her yelling at me. I'm trying to make today a yell free day (I was close but failed at 10pm). So he changes, comes back, we all take photos.

We did a bit of walking and I was in stiletto heels my mom picked out for me. They were cute but uncomfortable. My feet were in pain and I made it clear that I was in pain generally. But I didn't feel safe telling my mom that these shoes are now uncomfortable because previous comments she's made in the past sounds like she doubts my ability to walk in heels, which bothers me. At one point, I was going to take them off for the walk and my dad told me not to. Thankfully, my boyfriend gave me a piggy back ride for a bit. (Unfortunately I am gaining some weight so I think that made it more difficult for him to carry me.)

We go to lunch together then everyone (minus boyfriend who is now at work) congregates to my uncle's house and have a kickback. It wasn't until I watched a TikTok about a new lipstick to realize it triggered me to earlier events today. We're taking photos and what I recall is mom whining where is my lipstick. I do wear makeup but I don't normally wear lipstick so I had gloss on. I say that and mom scoffed, rolled her eyes, changed her body language, something that tells me not having lipstick was not her preference.

I found myself stuck on these things to the point of ranting to other people a few times throughout the day. I decided that maybe having a conversation with her would help so we could clear the air and try to work things out. I try to have calm, adult conversations in which both sides are heard and respected. This didn't go that way and it never does.

I came home and asked her if we could talk downstairs away from everyone so this is a conversation between me and her. I told her I just wanted to talk about some things that happened today that didn't make me feel good and that it was hard coming to her because I'm afraid of her labeling me as sensitive (which she has done and it feels like it is more to excuse others actions and place blame on me. For example, she tells me I have bad hair in front of my brother and his girlfriend. When I tell her there is no such thing as good hair, it's how you take care of the hair you were born with and continued to go along with it, she calls me sensitive. Her whole thing was she and my brother have good hair and I should have been born with it too. I interpret the sensitive label as her not finding issue with what she said/did and put the issue on me). So I try to explain to her the above things and how it makes me feel. She gets defensive, yells at me (which leads to me crying), and says I'm making things out of nothing and I'm trying to blame my whole life issues on her. Despite crying, I continue to try and deescalate by letting her speak/yell, respond calmly with "okay" and "I understand", and trying to be an adult. (I tell people I can't have adult conversations with my mom and this is what I mean). I am listening to her and how she only planned for her to be in the pictures. She did invite my brother but he doesn't normally come to my functions so she'd take my niece as some part of him if he didn't show up. My dad also tries to come out here once and awhile so she offered him a ride for when she picks up my niece. Basically, I think my family members misinterpreted as everyone, including my brother's girlfriend, being involved. My mom didn't say anything but rolled with it. She mentioned to her boyfriend (who I don't think originally was going to be in the photos until everyone tagged along) that she didn't invite my brothers girlfriend to be in these photos, doesn't know how to tell her that, and is afraid of my boyfriend thinking that she was rude for inviting everyone but him. But the thing is, nothing is communicated to me about the event. I feel that if I would have known what my mom was planning, I would have rolled with punches as well. Tell me what your original plans were so I don't get "bent out of shape" (mom's words) when people come at me with why I didn't do this or that.

She didn't register what I meant about the lipstick, heels and being labelled sensitive. For the lipstick, she says they put lipstick on you at Ulta when they do your makeup there so that was... An assumption I should have made? And assumption she made? I don't know but I haven't had my makeup done by them in five years and I do my makeup differently. I don't even own lipstick and haven't worn any in like 3+ years. For the heels, she said/yelled I should have told her they were uncomfortable (they weren't when I made sure they fit, I never had to walk in them previously) or that I wanted shorter heels or wider wedges which wasn't the point. The point was I didn't feel comfortable telling her directly they were uncomfortable because past actions made me believe she'd think less of me. For the sensitivity thing, in which I tried to explain she also said things like this while I was growing up, she took that as me placing all blame on her. Not the fact that I don't like to be called sensitive and it makes me feel like she is placing blame on my emotions. When I tried to clarify that part, she told me I need to stop doing that.

Afterwards she asks if there is anything else and I said I think the conversation is done. She agrees, stomps off, and continues to talk about how I am trying to find things to blame on her. I go to the kitchen, cry, and put things away. She asks me how to remove her false lashes and I say peel them off. I go to my room, cry some more, and write this post.

I didn't expect anything to change, I actually did predict all of this happening. I still did it because I was pissed off that I was still pissed off. And some part of me hopes this will lead to better communication with my mom which I have past evidence of that not being the case. I end up sadder than before and she ends up pissed off, possibly thinking I'm ungrateful, against her, whatever.

I don't want my children to feel this way. I don't want anyone to feel this way with me. I want to be able to have calm conversations with people in which things can be resolved or we can understand each other better. I want there to be respect, regardless of the differences in opinion, lifestyle, whatever. Thankfully, I feel like I am doing a good job incorporating that into my relationships minus my family ones. Mostly my mom but my brother has his moments too.

My brother also understands where I'm coming from when it comes to things like this. My mom isn't exactly what I would call emotionally available. My brother began to resent it before I did. I think having his daughter and having my mom be involved made it better. I think my brother also tried to have similar conversations with my mom that backfired. He says she was raised in a time/way that family members could say/do whatever and you have no choice but to get over it because they're family. The thing is, my mom taught us cut off culture very early in life. My birth father and his family are cut off. She's cut off some of her family members. I actually cut off her former boss/family friend for inappropriate comments he made about me sexually and comments he made about my boyfriend who's white which I told her about and she didn't listen to until my brother and father were like "yeah we know why she cut him off and we're glad she did" (she actually went on the try to get my brother and father to tell her why and I told them not to say anything because I had already told her I was cutting him off to her face because of inappropriate comments. She said okay and asked no follow up questions. For this moment, it felt like she wanted to know just because everyone else did, not for my own wellbeing in which she would have listened to me when I told her to her face).

But yeah, my mom is not horrible. Far from it. It's mostly the lack of emotional availability and the issue of accountability (for everyone, not just her). But I wouldn't be surprised that once I moved out and became self sufficient that I cut her off too. There is enough trauma that I'm not given a right to fix or find closure with her and it affects me. I want it not to. I want to move on with my life. If that means moving on from my mother, I should be okay with that

[tonyglowheart]

This entire thing is a rant, feel free to ignore it, but I saw your post about how destiel fans can’t win in this context, and yeah. So have some rambles.

I’ve been thinking about the fact we (current spn/destiel fans) can’t win all night... I’ve seen so many people talking about how homophobic it is - and while I would very much like to argue, as every point I’ve seen made by a non-spn fan has been wrong so far, if I did everyone inside the fandom would agree and everyone outside would either call me straight or pity me for believing it’s okay.

(Cas wasn’t even sent to hell lmao. He was sent to angel death (the empty), a place he has escaped in the past. Other points, like that meta about spn has been predicting exactly this for months, that Dean ended up sobbing on the floor because he was so upset, like that death means next to nothing on spn, like that there is two episodes left, etc etc. you feel me right? I just don’t want to post wank to other spn blogs atm, we’re getting enough frustration as it is, no need to add to it.

It’s also worth pointing out that the bar is very, very low. Spn is a prominent TV show - not a Netflix show, or indie, or whatever - and it just said “main character in gay love saved the world”. [insert gif of ghostfacers dude saying that gay love can pierce through the veil of death and save the day here]

I just saw someone saying that spn having Naomi try to brainwash Cas out of loving dean makes spn homophobic (it is a conversion therapy parallel). My first response to that is that Naomi was the villain lmao? I guess we can’t write villains doing anything homophobic because having villains do homophobic things makes, uh - checks notes - villains look homophobic, and clearly we can’t have that.

There certainly are legitimate things to criticise spn about, but this isn’t it lol.

Also now some people are unironically trying to cancel Jensen because “his acting was homophobic, and so he’s clearly homophobic”, nevermind that he’s an actor and his character struggles with understanding his emotions (which I think he played excellently, myself. That scene had a very Dean delayed emotional response), nevermind the support he’s given to us queers in the past. Like. Idek man.

We would have been laughed at if we got no destiel, too.

It would have been worse, had the writers pulled a dumbledore. At this point I also trust the writers not to pull a GoT - they have explicitly criticised that ending in spn’s canon.

Spn’s writers did that by making the main villain of this season, Chuck / God, say GoT had a good ending. To reiterate a previous point I had: villains do bad things because they’re bad. And the bad things they do make them bad. For the people out there not still following, if someone does something in a story and it makes them a villain, that is explicitly telling you the story (and probably the writers) thinks that thing is bad. In this case, Chuck likes to write things for him, and we the audience have been shown and told that is bad.

Apparently thinking a gay confession is good in 2020 makes me straight. Seems unlikely, but whatever. Sorry for the length, I guess I went overboard, I’ve been holding it in lol. Anyway, DESTIEL IS CANON 💚💙 hope you have a good night

Helloo supernatural anon I hope you are living your best life right now. Yeah I’m like..... skeptical and leery myself but having lived through some absolute garbage discourse that is general purity wank, as well as the C/QL greater fandom here and on Twitter I find myself... much more wanting to question the “general wisdom” of things esp in terms of negativity, bc a lot of the time I find.... it’s wrong? Like so wrong. Or at least presents such an incomplete picture of the whole situation and also presents it in such a removed context that words that have meaning and are operationalized in a certain way for a reason, no longer have meaningful usage.

Anyway I don’t... know too much about the specifics of Spn but someone I follow is into it and talks a lot about the Gnostic stuff and that all was very fascinating to me, and I also have been grappling a lot with cultural Christianity bc of cmedia and the way ppl just *clenches fist* unthinkingly or uncritically slap some Christian norms on it and call it a day 😩 help I’m Tired. My thing here being... I actually got tired of the uncritical “superhell”s at some pt bc I am, in fact, incredibly exhausted with cultural Christianity, and because it does seem like, even possibly(?) without the Gnostic stuff it’s different from a “hell” or other Protestant-derived afterlife concept, and also yeah that it wasn’t seeded out of nowhere, it was set up to happen, which then... lends credence to the idea that whatever the current era of Spn is doing, the current showrunners are doing it with purpose.

And idk I just... refuse to believe the concept that ALL of the fans of Spn - esp the ones who have been following it still, or got back into it and are following it currently, are acting under delusion or are fooling themselves into liking it or thinking it’s good or whatever. I personally find that kinda infantilizing and patronizing and playing into issues of dismissing things women and/or other marginalized identities like.

Plus I find the concept that (from what I think I’ve been seeing Spn fans say) that the current era of the show is quite actively grappling with itself, its past, its legacy. to be very interesting and compelling; it hearkens back to like an old lore kind of feeling, of a thing that has grown into a nigh undefeatable monster and realizing that, also realizing that the only way to defeat itself is through grappling with its own nature and transforming and transmuting itself into something else. I personally find that more plausible and compelling than “Supernatural has been actively and continuously queerbaiting for 15 homophobic homophobic years., so right now we’re all very sorry for you because this maybe is no longer queerbaiting but it’s still homophobic and it can never be anything different ever.” I’ve been sort of tangentially aware of Spn thru the years and didn’t we agree, around the time of that in-universe play about Spn and with the lil Destiel shoutout, that Spn has come a ways as far as coming to terms with its fandom and working to treat its fans better? Why the sudden regression into “oh no, Supernatural is and forever will be homophobic and a hate crime”? 🤔 

The rest under a cut bc the ask is already long and then my rambling will get longer-

But yeah I mean..... I get that the legacy of Supernatural has been certifiably Rough, but I think people also forget how different of a time 2005 was? Hell, how different of a time 2015 was, even, prior to, say, Obergefell v. Hodges. Now I’m not saying that to blanket-excuse Supernatural, but like, you look at mainstream shows from the era and... there’s a lot of shit lmao. The fact that Supernatural has existed this long seems to me like.... maybe we CAN look at how it’s developed through the years vs just insisting it is what it was 15, 10, hell, 5 years ago. Especially since, to my knowledge, there’s been showrunner changes? Which seems to me like it would... affect things? I mean honestly, I remember back when I got into Spn for a hot second because of Castiel, I remember watching panel, Q&A, etc vids thru the years, and like... I thought we agreed that... it was the fans who were going a bit far pushing the shipping question like literally ALL the time to the actors, who are not in control of the show and.... like at the time.... that could have had personal implications for them? And yes homophobia bad, and people can still be allies despite that, but again like.... I do feel like - from what I’ve seen - that these guys were NOT ready to deal with a lot of that but they’ve (okay Jensen I’m talking about Jensen here) genuinely grown and learned? Also how many years ago was the essay autograph thing that people keep trotting out, like what year was it in and what year of spn was it, and what were the prevailing opinions on LGBT issues and bisexuality then.

I’ve been seeing some murmurings of identity politicsing surrounding ppl who enjoy Supernatural, and I’m sorry that that’s happening to you, it really fucking sucks and it’s also the dumbest way to “make” or “win” an argument because it shouldn’t ever be a final determiner, just factors to consider when considering what life experiences might have informed someone else’s PoV and views as well as maybe how you can better communicate with them. Instead of it being a “weapon” or “tool” to either dismiss someone or de facto validate an argument.

Also yeah I get it that you don’t want to send discourse to spn blogs bc I imagine you guys ARE actively grappling with all the bs rn and it’s a lot. Even just from like, the stuff I see around, I’m like tired of it. I’m genuinely having more fun with ppl who are having a good time with Supernatural than the ppl who are hating on it, even in this sort of backhanded “oh we’re not clowning YOU we’re clowning the writers and showrunners who think you should be satisfied with this,” when... yeah? the people who HAVE been watching the show and therefore... know what’s up.. DO seem to be? And all this based on *fake gasp* context. And that’s where the backhandedness becomes kind of poisonous to me, because it implies that it IS bad, and that you SHOULDN’T be satisfied, but poor little you are but don’t worry, we’re not making fun of YOU for liking garbage, you’re just the hapless victim who is consuming the garbage bc... idk, whatever reasons ppl are coming up with ig.

idk man it’s 2020. Fandom isn’t activism, performative or otherwise, it’s okay to let people enjoy things even if you think they’re “objectively” bad, and like... I don’t know if people can call something bad when they’re not even working with the whole context and instead are dealing with rumor and reputation. 

[howtodisassembleyourdeviant]

Rules

1.) No god-modding, meta-gaming, or any of the usual roleplay malarkey. Respect amongst the players. If you choose to use a specific plot or AU I outlined outside of our roleplay, please ask first. 

2.) I am an adult. I will not be roleplaying with anyone under the age of 18, and I will not write any NSFW threads with anyone under 21. NSFW is not necessary for any threads. I know I write it a lot, and some of it is pretty out there, but I 100% do not require it. 

3.) All sexually explicit posts go under ‘ sexual deviant ’ If I miss one or something is a little more sexual than I realize, feel free to let me know either by DMing me or sending me an anon. I will fix it immediately. 

4.) Triggers: My main writing triggers are dub-con and non-con. I also cannot write threads with themes that include infidelity. I prefer when I write angst that there is a happy ending, but I can understand there are times when that is not possible, or it becomes too predictable. That being said, if you want to discuss plots, hit me up in the DMs or my Discord: DisassembledDeviant#7234

If you have any triggers, please tell me. I may not realize what I'm writing might bother others and it’s difficult to remember what might be triggering, even though I read your rules. If you are getting upset with something I wrote, or feel that the plot is getting off course, let me know. I cannot read minds and will perceive anything written is how you want your muse and the storyline to go. I write how my muse feels in the situation and I can inform you why or make changes if necessary, but I need to know. Don’t expect me to know what you’re thinking or how you feel. Mun does not equal muse. 

5.) I do not purposely drop threads without informing the other partner. If you noticed I haven’t replied to one in a while, chances are, I’ve lost it. Please feel free to inform me. I know most do, but I do not mind being poked, just be mindful.

6.) I reply to damn near everything and sometimes my replies are long. Please don’t be intimidated by that. I do not care what length you reply with, as long as you give me something to work with. If I start to overwhelm you with threads, or if the length is just too long, please let me know and I’ll re-do my reply. 

7.) I do not ship hankcon/hannor. I know a lot of people do, and I have no problem with them, but I will not do it. They are friends/family only for me. I don't hate the ship, I just have a deep connection with Connor's character and 'daddy issues', to put it simply. Everyone else I'm pretty open-minded about shipping with.

If you do ship hankcon/hannor, I ask that you tag it please. (RP threads don't necessarily need to be tagged as I will just avoid reading threads between Hank rpers and other Connor rpers, but I wouldn't mind if you did.) I do consider it a trigger as I do have an emotional reason for it and not because of the dynamic. It makes things easier for me and I greatly appreciate it. Thank you.

8.) I over-think/over-complicate things. If I ask you something and the answer is obvious, please don't be rude. 

9.) I am a human. I have people I don’t associate with and my reasons for it are my own (and vice versa). What they choose to do is their own business, but no matter the situation, I will not mention names or talk about them behind their back. Any opinion you have, I hope is based on your own interactions with me and not based on whatever is said by others. People say a lot of things when upset or angry, can paint people to be villains, and not enough bother to hear both sides. Please, keep the discourse and drama away, I’m here to have fun with my friends and hopefully make new ones along the way. 

About the Mun:

My name is Arsenic, but I go by Seni (pronounced like penny only with an s instead of a p) I don't really care what you call me though. 

Demiromantic/Asexual

I'm 29

Diagnosed with ADHD when I was 22 and I have a lot of hang-ups about that. It does affect my writing, often leaving me to obsess with certain threads more than others. I don’t mean to, but it happens. It does not mean I like other threads less.  

Time zone is CST

Originally from South Carolina, but I've been around.

I am outdated (I often don’t understand memes or new slang and my pop culture is limited) and often don't pick up on sarcasm (which kinda works when writing an android).

Thank you for reading and understanding. I hope you enjoy my Muse and we can have some fun! 💙

[shinrasfirst]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥

My muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless /

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant to the main story?  YES / NO. (I mean? I’m not sure? I hope he will be more important, but as it is, he could have been cut out of Part 1 of the remake.)

Were they relevant to the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG. (Except that he kinda saved him.. I can’t answer these questions, I am so biased.)

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO. (?)

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. Depends on who you ask, I’d say!

How strictly do you follow canon?

There isn’t much canon to go on, first of all. I am taking what I can get and expand on it. There’s probably some stuff about him that I don’t know, because I am notoriously bad at researching things properly, and also I forget stuff. So.. he’s canon-based as much as possible, but then majorly fleshed out by my own ideas because otherwise he’d be a very two-dimensional character.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutual.

He’s wild and fun and crazy and could make for some interesting threads---

He is actually compatible with a lot of muses because he technically works for Shinra, but then doesn’t seem to give a lot of fucks about his employment status, meaning he can also work with the other side without me having to change his setting much.

He’s gorgeous. Look at him.

He is flirty and easy to smut with.

He has a completely unknown backstory that could be explored c;

Did you see that ass?

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  

He’s a bit nuts. If you’re looking for a predictable, soft, sweet romance or friendship, he is not your guy.

He'll probably die young. And there shall be angst and pain.

I’ve seen some people really reduce him to a maniac to lives on the road to attack random people. If that’s your idea of Roche then I am sure you wouldn’t be looking for threads with him~

He is tough to write love/romance with. Like proper romance.

He has a completely unknown backstory.. so my version might differ greatly from what you have in mind.

What inspired you to rp your muse?  

I played the Remake and driving on those motorcycles was insane but kind of fun - and then shows up this guy who just drove right into my heart as soon as he popped up on the screen, laughing like a mediocre villain from YuGiOh. I thought that was all it was going to be, but I was thrilled to see that it wasn’t. I just love this character. I rewatched his fight scenes with Cloud a hundred times. He is so.. peculiar. I just couldn’t stop thinking about him, and then I saw a bit more of him on tumblr, fanarts and such, and I wanted to give it a shot :)

What keeps your inspiration going? 

New headcanons about him that pop into my head. Finding other people who love him and talking to them & rping with them! Like with all muses, I tend to love them even more the longer I play them, compared to when I start out, because new stories around them develop, I get a clearer image of their character and backstory in my head, and new plans for their future :) On a more to-the-point level: quotes, poems, music, images, all those things give me inspiration. Also similar characters in other media, or stories that fit Roche and that I can recycle and reform into part of his.

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO. According to whom? I am alright with the way I write him, or I’d be doing it differently. Would Square Enix think I am doing a good job? Idk. Do other Roche rpers think I am? Idk. Does it matter? As long as there are people who enjoy writing with my version of him, I am doing my job, I think :) There are Roche portrayals I find “better” than mine in some ways, more developed, but I don’t really compare myself in that way. 

Do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO.

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO.  

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day? YES / NO.

Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO. Yes and now because while I stand to the way I write all my muses, Roche in particular is one I haven’t fully developed yet. There are things about his story I am still unsure about or have no clear ideas for yet. So, I’m not feeling insecure when I write him, but I am not overly confident in throwing him in any situation, because something might come up that’ll require me to think harder that I’d have to while playing.. e.g. Rufus.

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO. I’m no Rowling, I’m no Tolkien, I know that. But I think my writing is alright. I try to put some internal thoughts in my replies, describe the scene abit, offer some dialogue if applicable, and move the action forward. I am not writing a book here, I am writing something interactive, so my partner is my main concern aside from telling the story. I do feel like I’m doing an okay job at that, so in that sense I am confident in my writing.

Are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO. I’m not entirely sure what this is referring to, but generally I’d say no. I can deal with most topics, it’s pretty hard to offend me, I’m open to most things, and there are very few issues I feel like they can’t be solve with just talking about them.

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?

It depends? I almost never get constructive criticism. What I absolutely accept is things like.. someone correcting mistakes I’ve made in terms of timelines or canon facts, because I am lazy by default and tend to not research something well and just wing it. So it might be that I’ll put some fake news into my threads that I have no problem with if someone corrects - actually, please do, I’ll gladly fix it. (Especially if they’re relevant to your muse.)

If someone dislikes a headcanon of mine or something that is particular to my portrayal of Roche, that’s really not something I aspire to change. I have my ideas of him and everyone else has their own. If a friend came to me and told me a certain headcanon of mine makes no sense because of the canon storyline or whatever, and it sounded valid to me, I’d consider that. That wouldn’t offend me. If someone just told me they dislike an idea I had, that is the kind of criticism I don’t really accept. That’s not criticism to me, that is a personal opinion that we disagree on. It’s not my problem if someone dislikes my portrayal, they don’t have to interact with it. I take no offense in that, unless it’s reported to me in a rude manner.

With regard to my writing? I don’t ask for criticism and I don’t really want it either. I know what areas I have to work on in order to improve, I don’t need anyone to give me pointers there. I have enough of that in my academic papers at university ;) This is a hobby, so I’m trying to have a good time and good plays with others, I’m not trying to win any awards. However, if I post a reply my partners aren’t sure how to work with (e.g. they need more dialogue, or more action) I am absolutely willing to edit it, no problem. Also, not just on tumblr/in the RPC but in general, people are really really REALLY bad at giving constructive criticism. It never ceases to amaze me how much people suck at that. Like I said, I don’t get offended easily, but it makes me laugh sometimes (e.g. after presentations at uni) how horrible the feedback comes across sometimes. And then everyone gets butthurt and I once again marvel at the fact that no lecturer ever gives advice on how to give good feeback. (I guess because a lot of lecturers can’t do it either.)

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  

Absolutely! It helps a lot. Sometimes it’s a real challenge, but those are necessary and very welcome while developing a character. Other people often think of things I didn’t even consider, so I welcome it when they come into my askbox with these questions :)

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why? 

Maybe? If it was a friend or an rp partner, I’d hear them out for sure. If it was someone I don’t even write with.. maybe not. Like, what’s the point? Clearly I made up my mind about it, so why would you come to me to inform me that you see it differently? Go right ahead, neither one of us writes these games, so both our versions are equally right or wrong. If it’s about something that could lead to an interesting discussion, though? I’d be interested to hear your thoughts.

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?

I'd say some people like chocolate ice cream and some like vanilla. That’s okay. I’m not trying to please everyone on tumblr, I’m here to write what I want to write and if just one other person likes my portrayal, that can be enough for me :) If someone dislikes my portrayal, they’re free not to interact with me.

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  

I’ve written more characters that were absolutely despised by a good chunk of the fandoms I was in, than characters who were loved, I think. I couldn’t care less. If someone hates Roche - or any of my muses - that’s their thing and has nothing to do with me. As long as they don’t feel the need to inform me about it or send me hate over it, what’s it to me? I don’t need people to like my favorite characters, it has no influence on how I feel.

But also.. why would you hate Roche? Look at him, he’s amazing :D

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  

Sure. English isn’t my first language, I’m sure I make mistakes all the time. I’m not embarrassed by that, everyone makes mistakes, even people whose first language is English. That being said, don’t go weeding through my posts looking for mistakes, because I won’t go back and fix them in most cases, so it’s really a waste of time~

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?

I think so. I’m pretty relaxed most of the time, and I try to be polite and kind in any situation that comes up. I don’t get offended unless you’re accusing me of something I didn’t do, twist my words, insult my friends, or act like a total brat. Before I start a war with someone, I’ll usually withdraw myself from the situation. I am pro-unfollowing/blocking if I dislike someone. I would never send anon hate or write a call out. I’m not here for that. I think we should all try to be kinder than we feel, we should all show respect for others and tolerate differences, and we should try to treat people the way we want to be treated. Live and let live.

That’s about it, congrats for filling out!

Tagged by:  stole it. Tagging: anyone who’d like!

[nightqueendany]

Original Final Season 7 - Episode 6: Summerhall

Last Episode was a bit of a cliffhanger so here’s the fallout from The Storm:

*Wish I had a better image for the episode, but this is the only artwork for Summerhall I could find! Hmm, this needs remedying. 

It’s finally snowing in King’s Landing in this episode, appropriate for us to finally see snow in the south right after the Night King has broken through the Wall

IN WINTERFELL

Picking up directly where the last episode left off, Bran tells Sansa they need to get word to all the Northern Houses, everyone has to get to White Harbor, there will be ships waiting for them there (no explanation), no time to wait for Targaryen armies to come, they can’t hold the North that long

Bran also mysteriously tells Sansa they need to send a raven to Summerhall - Sansa mentions its an abandoned ruin, a raven could never get there, Bran says he can warg the bird, Sansa just needs to write that the Wall has fallen and the dead come south

AT SUMMERHALL

Team Jon/Dany arrive on dragon-back (this was Jorah’s suggested location) and make camp in the ruined halls (it’s abandoned, no one - enemies - would find them there)

Sitting around the fire, Jorah tells them all what he knows of Rhaegar and how Rhaegar used to love coming there, the tragedy at Summerhall when Rhaegar was born, etc.

In their explorations of the ruins, they come across one part of the castle that isn’t entirely destroyed - the library - and Jorah mentions Rhaegar used to be quite scholarly until, according to rumor, he read something in his scrolls that made him believe he had to be a warrior (like Barristan’s story to Dany in ASOS)

Missandei begins picking through the books, some disintegrate when she picks them up due to age/damage from the elements, but some do not, she takes a few that are not damaged

While plotting their next move (where should they go, The Reach? Dorne? King’s Landing?) they receive a random, hastily written raven’s scroll from Sansa and Bran - The Wall has fallen, the dead march south.

They send the raven/Bran to Davos and Tyrion at Gendry’s shop in King’s Landing telling them about the attack on Dragonstone and that they will meet them there in the capital

After the raven leaves, Jon, panicked, insists he and Dany fly to Winterfell to rescue his family/make sure they make it to safety and Dany reluctantly agrees

IN OLDTOWN

They receive word from Winterfell, the Wall has fallen, encourage maesters to spread the word to the rest of the Kingdoms so they can prepare for the fight, the maesters are old shits about it, debating the validity of the scroll, etc.

Sam, in frustration, finally leaves the Citadel with Gilly and Little Sam

BACK IN THE NORTH

Everyone is rushing to pack and leave, Sansa is incredibly emotional about leaving Winterfell when they’ve just fought to get it back, Bran finally tells her the ships that are waiting for them at White Harbor are Greyjoy ships and Theon is anxious to see her, Sansa is then less reluctant to leave

Team Stark/the North arrive at White Harbor just as Yara and Theon do, Bran and Sansa quickly explain the circumstances - the Wall has fallen, not enough time to get Dany’s armies North, North must flee south on the Greyjoy ships (we see Howland and Meera in this group somewhere among other prominent Northerners like Lyanna Mormont, Lord Umber, etc.)

Yara begins to plot course for Dragonstone but Bran explains Euron has taken it, most of his fleet is destroyed but he and his men still occupy the castle, Yara then wants to make course for the Iron Islands to take her home back and it’s “Somewhere the dead can’t go” but again, Bran advises against it, he tells them to set a course for King’s Landing - it’s where EVERYONE is headed and will meet up

Theon and Sansa reunite (obviously), Sansa is stressed about going to King’s Landing where Cersei is and where she was held captive for years, Theon comforts her and sparks fly, they end up falling into bed together - AKA Theonsa boatsex

IN KING’S LANDING

Cersei gets word from Euron about the attack on Dragonstone, pissed that it was a relative failure, she wanted all of them dead and nearly everyone, save a few nameless soldiers, survived, she then tasks Jaime with finding Tyrion and killing him, “Bring me our brother’s head” (much like Aerys wanting Jaime to bring him Tywin’s head) and this is Jaime’s last straw, he can’t support her anymore and so he leaves her

In getting ready to flee King’s Landing, Jaime runs into Tyrion, Davos, and Gendry, Jaime explains that Dragonstone has been taken so they can’t go there, instead, they regroup at Gendry’s shop to figure out what they should do next, receive Bran/Jon’s raven about heading to King’s Landing, it’s decided, they stay in the city

After Jaime leaves her, Cersei wakes up in a “bed of blood,” she's miscarried her baby

The Riverlands, Northerners, and Vale forces arrive outside King’s Landing and join up with the forces from Dorne and the Reach/the Dothraki and Unsullied, Baelish and Varys are there to greet them

Baelish and Varys impress upon the troops the importance of the alliance between Jon and Dany, they are there for one purpose and one purpose only - to defeat the Lannisters who have had a hand in harming every single one of them in the last several years, it’s finally time to take the Lannisters down

Baelish and Varys are next seen sneaking into the city in order to meet with...Qyburn

Arya, knowing how to sneak in and out of King’s Landing secretly, gets into the city as well and goes where Bran told her to go - she winds up standing just outside...Gendry’s shop

BACK IN THE NORTH 

In an unidentifiable location, Jon and Dany take a flying break at a waterfall and discuss what to do, from what Dany can tell on their flight, the North is deserted, Jon agrees and concludes the Northerners must have fled south or to White Harbor

Seeing Jon in a better mood, Dany quips they could “stay a thousand years” and no one would find them, not even this “Night King”

She mentions that, because they’ve been flying a very long distance and it’s getting dark, they need to make camp somewhere for the night, give themselves and the dragons a rest

Jon reveals Winterfell isn’t far, it’s likely deserted but they can stay for the night before heading back south to King’s Landing

IN WINTERFELL 

Jon “cloaks” Dany as she has no suitable clothing (it was all left on Dragonstone when they abandoned the castle to Euron), it’s visually symbolic but nothing official

When Dany asks why Jon went back into the castle (Dragonstone) when they were attempting to flee Euron’s forces, he finally explains to her about R+L=J and gives her Rhaegar’s harp

There’s a tense moment between them until Jon finally suggests they marry to join the realm (King of the North, Queen of the South) and their claims, Dany asks if it would be a political marriage or because of something more (as she has started to fall for him), Jon says it would be both, he and Dany end up sleeping together, AKA Jonerys castlesex

Jon and Dany wake up to it still being night and both remark that it feels late and should be morning, though it’s not, upon going outside they see in the distance the AOTD approaching Winterfell, the Night King did, in fact, find them

It should be relatively easy for them to escape with the AOTD in the distance but the Night King raises the dead from the Winterfell crypts and Jon and Dany have to fight their way out of the keep

In the confusion of trying to escape, Viserion is killed

After Jon and Dany have fled south on Drogon and Rhaegal, the Night King finally raises Viserion as his mount

Title is obviously for Team Jon/Dany making camp in the ruined castle of Summerhall for the night.

Episode 6 Inside the Episode: Summerhall

1) First off, I know you guys are going to wonder, why Summerhall?

I know it’s an odd initial choice. It’s never (I don’t think) been mentioned on the show. But, for the purposes of this episode, it’s a great way to a) get out some much needed exposition and b) connect Rhaegar to the PTWP prophecy. And yes, for book nerds, I know Rhaegar would have been younger when he began training as a warrior, too young to have begun visiting Summerhall by himself, and therefore the book or scroll that led him to think he needed to be a warrior wouldn’t have been found at Summerhall. But 1) allow this one time suspension of disbelief or 2) headcanon that Rhaegar left the book/scroll containing this information at Summerhall for Missandei to eventually find. Whichever works for you.

2) The North escaping on the Greyjoy ships?

This one is too obvious. We had all thought this might need to happen. In 8x01 Yara even tells Theon they’ll need “somewhere the dead can’t go,” but NOTHING was ever done with this line. It was pointless. So this scene actually pays off Yara’s useless line from canon and also solves the issue from it - why wouldn’t Dany just retreat to her own island of Dragonstone? (Because she can’t, because Euron took it over, because that fucking makes sense that he and Cersei would do that).

3) Jon/Dany wake up and it is still night?

Yes, because the “Long Night” is actually not just one fucking night. I can’t even believe they had the audacity to call that idiotic episode “The Long Night” when it was, actually, just ONE night. *Sighs* *Rubs head*

Anyway...that’s it for Episode 6! As always, you guys are free to leave comments. I’d love to see people’s opinions, questions, speculations, predictions. Whatever you guys want to discuss!

Original Final Season 7: Preface Post

Season 7 Episode 1: Family, Duty, Honor

Season 7 Episode 2: Greywater Watch

Season 7 Episode 3: The Last of the Dragons

Season 7 Episode 4: Dragonglass

Season 7 Episode 5: The Storm 

Season 7 Episode 6: Summerhall (Current Episode)

Season 7 Episode 7: A City Fit For A King

Season 7 Episode 8: Protectors of the Realm

Season 7 Episode 9: The Battle For The Dawn

Season 7 Episode 10: ?

[eldritchsurveys]

957.

5k Survey LIV

2751. What's the most interesting assignment you ever had in school? >> I’m not sure. I hope people realise that my last moment in any kind of school was in December of 2005 (and my last moment in high school was June of 2004). I can barely be arsed to remember anything from 15 years ago unless it’s trauma-related. 2752. What's the most interesting thing you ever had to do for work? >> I thought working as a merch seller for local bands was very interesting. I had a lot of fun. 2753. Do you feel: insignifigant? unable to evoke change? like one person can't change the world? like one life and one person's suffering doesn't mean very much? If you answered yes to any of those can you describe why in detail? >> I, personally, feel insignificant fairly often, but that doesn’t extend to thinking that other people are also equally insignificant.  2754. Do you feel like you could contribute as much to society as ____ has? Albert Einstein: Abe Lincoln: Franz Kafka: Jesus Christ: >> Just because I already have self-esteem problems doesn’t mean I’m going to sit here and consciously make “do you have as much worth as these people” comparisons. 2755. Are you aware that your brain is the same size as Albert Einstein's brain? Do you realize that you have the same number of hours in a day as Abraham Lincoln? Did you know that Franz Kafka wrote all of his amazing litterature during his lunchbreaks at work? Did you know that we are all made of matter and that you are made of the Same Thing that Jesus was made of? Do you still believe that you couldn't contribute as much to society as they did? If yes than WHY? >> This is an immensely irritating line of questioning, I hope it’s over now.

2756. Is your mind in the gutter? >> My mind is not in the gutter. 2757. What do you have to complain about? >> Whatever I want to complain about. 2758. Do you remember rock n' roll radio? >> ... Yes? Pretty sure it still exists, regardless. 2759. Is there such a thing as a food that you burn more calories from digesting than you actually absorb from it? >> I don’t know, try google. 2760. Hey, if you've gotten this far than you and me go way back. We've been hanging out for a while now and I gotta know..do you like me? >> --- 2761. What are you doing, Dave? >> --- 2762. As far as love goes do you feel it is better to become complete before looking for someone or find someone who completes you? >> People are already complete, despite however they may feel about themselves. I don’t understand what it means to look for someone who “completes you”, that sounds immensely absurd to me. So I guess I can’t really answer this question except to say “I don’t think people should be thinking about relationships in these terms...” 2763. What attracts you about the opposite sex (or same sex, or both sexes)? >> --- 2764. Do you need people or do you not need anyone? >> Of course I need other people. The fact that I have an attachment disorder is a direct result of my inherent need for other people’s love and support going repeatedly ignored. Even besides that, I need other people to physically survive, because that’s how ecosystems work, and believe it or not, we are still part of nature and beholden to its cycles and systems. 2765. Is selfishness always bad? Is selflessness always good? >> No. 2766. Do you feel like your life is being controlled by a power structure? >> Of course certain elements of my life as a social creature are controlled by power structures. 2767. Can you name three things in society that send the message that being completely yourself and that looking inside yourself and contemplating what's within is a good thing? >> Sigh. 2768. Can you name three things in society that send the message that materialism and the accumulation of stuff is a good thing? >> The entirety of capitalism. 2769. What is more important, a picture or it's frame? What is more important, spirituality or religion? >> These questions truly do get more baffling as time goes on. 2770. How many definitions can you come up with for the wword 'fuck'? >> I don’t have to come up with definitions, google is right there. 2771. Is it less offensive when a black person says Nigger than when a white person says it? Why or why not? >> The context in which a Black person says it is often a far different context from the one in which a white person says it. So, yes. It usually is less offensive by default, unless the Black person being addressed is uncomfortable with the word even when used in a friendly context. 2772. Do you rationalize often? >> Rationalise what? 2773. Do you believe that america is an imperialist nation? >> I mean, yeah. 2774. Would you agree that: hot topic is the new abercrombie? pink is the new black: you are the new you? >> *stares dully* 2775. Do you have more internet or real life friends? >> I only have Internet friends. 2776. What IS the feeding of 5000? >> The what?? 2777. What's an easy way to make money? >> I don’t know. 2778. What's your favorite slang word and what does it mean? >> I don’t think I have a favourite slang word. 2779. Are you uncomfortable? >> Slightly, because of noise issues. 2780. Is anything definate besides death and taxes? >> Taxes aren’t definite for everyone, but death certainly is. I don’t know what else is that predictable. 2781. Would you rather live fast and die young or live slow and die old? >> Living slow sounds nice to me. However it ends. 2782. Can you name 4 people who have committed crimes against humanity? How do you think they live with themselves? >> Probably, but I don’t feel like it. I don’t care how they live with themselves. 2783. If you could imagine, pure fantasy, any God you could concieve, how would you want God to be? >> I can imagine any god I want to imagine. It’s really not that hard, there are already so many to choose from, even if just to use as a template. 2784. do you think the smashing pumpkins have a strong christian theme? >> I don’t know, I’ve never paid a whole lot of attention to their lyrics. Their songs just sound pretty. 2785. Do you think this survey has a strong christian theme? >> I didn’t think that. I hope I won’t have cause to think it in the future. 2786. Fill in the blank for yourself" Give me ____ or give me death! >> --- 2787. Have you ever heard of the USA patriotism act? Apparently they have passed laws making torture legal. Also the FBI can sneak and peek into ANYONE'S home. They don't have to ask or even tell you they were there. This is already the law. So, whaddaya think? >> I mean, yes, I know that. I live here. 2788. The people in power step all over the average citizen, trying to secure all the power and money for themselves and leave us with no rights and under their control. They have the audacity to do this because they know that we will not lift a finger to stop them. Are they right? >> I don’t know if they’re right or not. I’m also not sure what the fuck powerful-ass finger you think we common folk all have. 2789. The Free State Project is a plan in which 20,000 or more liberty-oriented people will move to a single state of the U.S. to secure there a free society. They will accomplish this by first reforming state law, opting out of federal mandates, and finally negotiating directly with the federal government for appropriate political autonomy. They want to be a community of freedom-loving individuals and families, and want to create a shining example of liberty for the rest of the nation and the world. What's your opinion? Could this work? Why or why not? >> Didn’t a bunch of libertarians want to do this at some point? Anyway, I don’t know if this could work or not. I don’t know nearly enough about any of the elements involved to have an informed opinion about the feasibility of this kind of project. It does sound plenty audacious, though (and way too vague). 2790. Have you ever seen the Neverending Story? Remember when Bastian has to prove his worth by looking in that mirror where you see yourself the way you really are with no pretenses, rationalizations or mental lying? Could you stand yourself if you looked into that mirror? >> I do remember that, vaguely. I wanted to rewatch this movie but then I didn’t get to it in time and HBO took it down :( Anyway, I don’t know if I could stand myself if I looked into a mirror like that. I can’t conceptualise what that experience would actually be like. 2791. What is soilent green? >> Oh, you know. (That’s another movie I’d like to rewatch, in fact.) 2792. What are you proud that you have never done? >> *shrug* 2793. What things are hopeless? >> *shrug* 2794. What Are People For? >> Making Soylent Green out of. 2795. What book do you feel could change someone's life? >> Any book could change someone’s life. 2796. Didja ever want to just walk up to the Bush administration and ask them, 'What the fuck?' >> No, I wasn’t really paying much attention to the administration during that time because I had a lot of personal issues taking up my immediate focus. But from what little I remember about it, it’d be a valid question to ask. 2797. How do you take your coffeee? >> Decaffeinated. 2798. Have you ever played: paintball? lazer tag? which is better? >> I’ve never played these. 2799. In what ways are you lucky? >> A lot of ways, I guess. A lot of fucked up shit has happened, but a fair amount of strangely fortuitous stuff has happened, too. Guess something has to even the other shit out. 2800. If Jesse Jackson wants reparations to be given to black people because he thinks that black people don't have equal opportunities in this country than why does he drive a Jaguar? >> “Black people don’t have equal opportunities in this country” is still a fact of life no matter what the fuck kind of car Jesse Jackson drives. Focusing on his personal “success” or whatever like that is just a diversion from the heart of the matter.

[chanhassenrestorationservic-blog]

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[douchebagbrainwaves]

I'VE BEEN PONDERING ANYONE

Because kids are unable to create wealth, but to spend it doing fake work. Life is short, as everyone knows. And what drives them both is the number of startups are created to do product development on spec for some big company, and assume you could build something way easier to use. You could also rob banks, or solicit bribes, or establish a monopoly. In any period, it should be helpful to anyone who wants to understand the feeling of virtue in liking them. Plenty of famous founders have had some failures along the way. A few weeks ago I finally figured it out.1 03% false positives.2

That makes sense, because programs are in effect giant descriptions of how things get made. Treating a startup idea as a question changes what you're looking for. In school you are, in theory, explaining yourself to someone else. We're more patient. Moral fashions don't seem to get sued much by established competitors. Once you realize how little most people judging you care about judging you accurately—once you realize that because of the normal distribution of most applicant pools, it matters least to judge accurately in precisely the cases where judgement has the most effect—you won't take rejection so personally. The space of possible choices is smaller; you tend to standardize everything. What VCs should be looking for companies that hope to win by writing great software, but there is no permanent place in this world for ugly mathematics? In fact, you don't take a position and then defend it. This one may not always be true. It hadn't occurred to me till then that those horrible things we had to read in English classes was mostly fiction, so I know most won't listen.

This second group adopt the fashion not because they want to work for people with high standards. This is a talk I gave at the last minute I cooked up this rather grim talk. When a company starts misbehaving, smart people won't work there. So verbs with initial caps have higher spam probabilities than they would in all lowercase. And the source of error is not just random variation, but a Times Roman lowercase g is easy to tell apart.3 Such judgements can of course counter by sending a crawler to the site, you wouldn't need PR firms to tell you, because hackers would already be writing stuff on top of it. Cultivate a habit of questioning assumptions.4 Nature uses it a lot, which is the satisfaction of people's desires. When watches had mechanical movements, expensive watches kept better time. But something seems to come with practice.

So even in the middle of getting rich we were fighting off the grim reaper. It seems like it violates some kind of answer. Wouldn't it be amazing if we could achieve a 50% success rate? It's more a question of self-preservation.5 You have to do whatever seems best at each point. So my first prediction about the future of web startups.6 It's not just an airy intangible. Everyone's model of work you grew up with a million dollar idea is just a convenient way of trading one form of wealth for another. That is certainly true.

So odds are this is, in projects of their own. When I heard about this work I was a kid I used to calculate probabilities for tokens, both would have the same kind of office or rather, hacker opinion.7 So obviously that is what we are, founders think.8 It's absolute poverty you want to get real work done in an office with cubicles, you have to say, are evil. Mostly because they're optimistic by nature. I'm going to try to recast one's work as a single thesis. And so began the study of ancient texts had such prestige that it remained the backbone of education until the late 19th century. I met some investors that had invested in a hardware device and when I asked them what was the most significant thing they'd observed, it was mostly political. But while DH levels don't set a lower bound on the convincingness of a reply, they do set an upper bound, bearing in mind the small sample size. The remarkable thing about this project was that he got in trouble for.9 It was only after hearing reports of friends who'd done it that they decided to start a startup to starting one, and eventually someone will discover it.10 They may be enough to kill all the opt-in lists.

The church knew this would set people thinking. Since the invention of the quartz movement, an ordinary Timex is more accurate than a Patek Philippe costing hundreds of thousands of dollars. The reason is not just text; it has structure. An office environment is supposed to be something that helps you work, not something you read looking for a specific answer, and feel cheated if you don't have significant success to cheer you up, it wears you out: Your most basic advice to founders is just don't die, but the thousand little things the big company doesn't want to imagine a world in which high school students think they need to get good grades to impress employers, within which the employees waste most of their time in political battles, and from which consumers have to buy anyway because there are so many kinks in the plumbing now that most people don't even realize is there. There's nothing special about physical embodiments of control systems that should make them patentable, and the examiners reply by throwing out some of your claims and granting others. I learnt never to bet on any one feature or deal or anything to bring you success. Underneath the long words or the expressive brush strokes, there is no way to get rich. These get through because they're the one type of sales pitch you can make enormous gains playing around in problem-space. But you have to redefine the problem to make them irrelevant. In more organized societies, like China, the ruler and his officials used taxation instead of confiscation. Every engraver since Durer has had to live in Silicon Valley, that use of the word, Bill Gates is middle class.

So what to make of this. Few people are suited to running a startup can be demoralizing. I think things are changing. The problem is compounded by the fact that hackers, despite their reputation for social obliviousness, sometimes put a good deal of effort into seeming smart. But though it's not anger that's driving the increase in disagreement, there's a danger that they'll follow a long, hard path that ultimately leads nowhere. In the period just before the industrial revolution, some of the most pointless of all the great programmers I can think of who don't work for Sun, on Java, I know of zero. Descartes, though claimed by the French, did much of his thinking in Holland.11 But hackers use their offices for more than that.

Boston is a tech center to the same cause: Gates and Allen wanted to move back to Palo Alto, where he grew up, and they tend to do particularly well, because they're easier to see, because they generally don't die loudly and heroically. I'd spent more time with her. One of the most valuable thing they've discovered. But the breakage seems to affect software less than most other fields. England and France were made by courtiers who extracted some lucrative right from the crown—like the right to collect taxes on the import of silk—and so they don't try do to it. All the unfun kinds of wealth creation slow dramatically in a society that confiscates private fortunes. I mean by habits of mind you invoke on some field don't have to do is expand it. When a politician says his opponent is mistaken, that's a sure sign that something is broken?

Notes

That's one of those you can, Jeff Byun mentions one reason not to be, yet. The reason for the popular vote. 5 million cap, but instead to explain that the payoff for avoiding tax grows hyperexponentially x/1-x for 0 x 1. Something similar happens with suburbs.

There are successful women who don't aren't. His critical invention was a company selling soybean oil or mining equipment, such a baleful stare as they seem pointless. I think that's because delicious/popular with voting instead of hiring them. Security always depends more on the spot, so had a broader meaning.

Though most founders start out excited about the other: the company than you otherwise would have seemed shocking for a block or so. MITE Corp.

Perhaps this is a huge, analog brain state.

So how do they decide on the programmers, the more effort you expend on the dollar. After the war it was briefly in Britain in the right mindset you will fail. If you want to.

The only launches I remember are famous flops like the other hand, he took earlier. And journalists as part of the War on Drugs. As usual the popular image is several decades behind reality.

Something similar happens with suburbs. Com. It seems to have minded, which you ultimately need if you want to keep their wings folded, as I explain later. Cost, again.

I have about thirty friends whose opinions I care about valuations in angel rounds can make it a function of the venture business. When the Air Hits Your Brain, neurosurgeon Frank Vertosick recounts a conversation reaches a certain level of incivility, the increasing complacency of managements. For founders who go on to create giant companies not seem formidable early on. There's probably also the perfect point to spread the story a bit.

At this point for me do more with less, is that the only audience for your present valuation is fixed at the end of the kleptocracies that formerly dominated all the free OSes first-rate programmers. Most people let them mix pretty promiscuously. This is a self fulfilling prophecy.

Handy that, isn't it? We don't call it ambient thought.

Watt didn't invent the spreadsheet. If you extrapolate another 20 years. At first I didn't need to run spreadsheets on it, by encouraging people to claim that they'll only invest contingently on other sites. It is the fact that the graph of jobs is not always tell this to users, you've started it, whether you have to make software incompatible.

[littlemisssquiggles]

Non-Oscar related question, but I have a quick theory about Robyn Hill. I think Robyn is eventually going to discover the importance of the Amity Arena and Salem. Instead of Ironwood telling the whole world about Salem, it'll be Robyn. This might lead her to convince the citizens of Atlas to blame Ironwood for keeping secrets about the biggest threat of Remnant thus gaining votes for herself for the council seat.

Hmmm. Interesting theory anon-chan and there is a possibility that you could becorrect in that regards. However, if I may, speaking for myself here, I have adifferent outlook on Robyn’s role with Ironwood and everything surrounding Amity Arena.

Last episode, Robyn was noted telling her subordinates—Happy Huntresses Fiona, May and Johanna to do whatever it takes to find out what Ironwood is doing with Amity Area.

“What now?”“I want to know why Amity Colosseum is suddenly so important. Whatever it takes.”

Based on this quote from Robyn in the last episode and the fact that the episode synopsis for V7CH6 “Night Out” described our heroes taking a break from huntsmen duty to attend the Watch Party for the Atlesian Elections, one can predict that while she is attending the rally, Robyn will send some of her Happy Huntresses to scope out the site for Amity Tower. It’s as Clover mentioned during his itinerary run-down in CH5.

“Eyes up huntsmen! Time to get used to the new normal in Atlas. Your top priority is Amity Tower. That means protecting supply runs from Grimm and bandits and protecting the site itself…”

Part of our heroes’ responsibilities in the preparations for Amity Tower is protecting the construction site, as told by Clover. However if our heroes—JNR_RWBY will have a night off from duty, then who will be protecting the tower site in their absence? Will it be Clover and Qrow on duty? Will it be the Ace Ops? Let’s say…it’s the Ace Ops on duty for guarding Amity Tower while JNR_RWBY get to have their break for that night.

Here’s my theory with that:

The heroes have their first night off from duty for the first time in weeks. They attend the Watch Party for the election campaign but soon grow bored of the political festivities. However while at the party, JN(P)R_RWBY bump into Team FNKI again. 

Upon learning that our heroes were free that night, FNKI urge JN(P)R_RWBY to ditch the Watch Party with them in favour attending a much cooler party—an underground rave or something of the like. So JN(P)R_RWBY sneak away to go better blow off some steam partying with the FNKI.

Flynt did tell JN(P)R to let him know the next time they were free. Not to mention that Neon also promised Yang and Weiss to go partying with her and Flynt the next time they meet up back in V3. I’ve been itching to see our heroes go clubbing with the FNKI crowd since V3 so it wouldn’t surprise me if we finally got that for the next episode.

Perhaps…Oscar will be allowed to join them on this fun team excursion with their FNKI friends this time. If the heroes go partying with FNKI, I pray that Oscar ISN’T omitted again ESPECIALLY since it was highlighted that Neon of FNKI seems to be fond of him. It will definitely bug me to no end if the group goes out to have fun with FNKI WITHOUT OSCAR again and not even Neon asks about the ‘cute farm boy’ who’s supposed to be with them since…y’know?  He’s a part of the team! 

Unless Penny Polendina is made into his substitute yet again since V7 has suspiciously been inserting more Penny moments with the team than Oscar. This shouldn’t bug me since I do adore Penny a lot as a character. 

I mean, who doesn’t adore Pen-Pen, am I right?

However it does bug me since I find it unfair that Penny is the one allowed to be shown spending more time with our heroes gradually growing a better relationship with everyone while they’re in Atlas…but not Oscar? The newest member of their team? Hmmmm….

If you guys thought I was furious after V6CH9, I will honestly be livid if we get the Partying with FNKI subplot and Oscar is once again benched for some unexplainable reason that the PLOT couldn’t be bothered to show however Penny once gain gets to have this fun time bonding with JNR_RWBY. But not Oscar—the kid who’s supposed to be a part of the team. 

I will honestly not forgive the CRWBY Writers (particularly the credited writer for the episode or episodes in question) if they do this to Oscar again. V7CH4 was one thing but this squiggle meister will not be so complacent if they do this to Oscar twice in one season. I’m just going to put this out there as my own stance on this matter. Feel however you will in regards to this but please respect my own.

Anyways getting back on track with my theory—as I said, the heroes go partying with FNKI. But as they’re getting all the way turnt up at a rave, unbeknownst to them, danger strikes on the Amity Tower site when the Happy Huntresses sneak onto the grounds to dig up whatever info they can find.

Unfortunately for the Happy Huntresses, they run into the Ace Ops on duty. A battle ensues pinning the Huntresses against the Aces and the tense commotion from the battle between the two factions attracts nearby Grimm to the site and an ambush occurs.

The tower site is flooded with Grimm with the threat of the recent shipment of supplies to continue construction at risk of being destroyed in the rampage. This leads to back up being called in, inclusive of our gaggle of young heroes. However…let’s say…they don’t get wind of this going on because they allhanded over their Scrolls at the rave or turned them off or just didn’t hear them go off because of all the loud music from the party or something to that liking.

Eventually they do get wind of what went down at the site. Perhaps…the Happy Huntresses survived the onslaught while pilfering some of the stored supplies that was supposed to be dedicated to the Tower. This act ends up aggravating Ironwood the next day since, let’s say…the Happy Huntresses’ stunt cost the Tower a week of construction resulting in a delay in its construction? That could be a possibility.

With me, my theory for Robyn Hill has always been that she will be used as another guinea pig by Watts in his ploy against the General. Sorry if this bursts your bubble anon-chan but my opinion is that Robyn will neither be successful in winning the elections or outing Ironwood.

The honour of outing the General will be given to Watts while I highly believe that he will use his galaxy brain hacking skills to tamper with the election results and ensure that Jacques Schnee not only becomes Councilman but also eventually usurps Ironwood in governing Atlas in some way or form. 

My theory is that Watts will put a hit out on Robyn Hill. Since Ironwood mentioned that someone (Tyrian) has been targeting spokesmen from Mantle who spoke out against Atlas (like Forest), Robyn will also be targeted due to her influence on the People of Mantle. Tyrian will hunt down Robyn with the intentions of killing her—however Qrow and possibly Clover Ebi get wind of the attack on Robyn and come to her aid; as we saw hinted in the V7 Opening. 

However during the fight—Robyn either gets killed or “it’s made to appear that she had been killed” and her alleged death is later pinned on Clover Ebi. Since the V7 opening teased Watts overlooking an image of the Aces while smirking cunningly, my hunch is that Watts will spark a scandal with the People of Mantle to further tarnish Ironwood’s public reputation with its citizens.

Since Robyn has been proclaimed as the local hero of Mantle and voice for the people, then what better way to put the final nail in Mantle’s growing hatred and outcry against Ironwood than a scandal where the leader of his elite team of military huntsmen is accused of murdering the lone representative from Mantle?

Robyn Hill will be made a martyr in the destruction of Ironwood’s dwindling goodwill with Mantle. That’s this squiggle meister’s theory and I’m going to stick with this until the PLOT tells me otherwise.

~LittleMissSquiggles (2019)

[killthebxy]

i have so many mixed feelings about the season finale.

so.

many.

mixed.

feelings.

and i don’t really know where to start... so i think i’ll start at the end. and i’ll start by making a separation in my analysis.

1. if we look at s08 ep6 on its own

          i’ve been writing Jon Snow since January 24th, 2017. s07 happened during April-May 2017, if i remember well? which means, some of you who’ve been with me from the start of my blog have watched me watching s07; have watched my reactions and my opinions and my rants. ever since then, i have been very open and very vocal about how much i loathed the idea of Jon as the rightful heir to the Iron Throne, and Jon eventually sitting this throne as king --- those of you who’ve followed me for less time also likely know this very well, because gods know i never shut up about it. so, considering the finale that Jon had... someone might tell me: you must be very happy! and, well... i am very happy. i was not made to see Jon sitting the throne. i was not made to see everyone call him Agony and hail him and glorify him. i got to see him wearing his black cloak again and returned to where he belongs --- away from thrones and kings and queens, away from the ungrateful northern lords, making peace with the free folk. hell, i even got to see him hugging Ghost, imagine. who would have thought, Jon Snow loves his soulmate more than his own life. sarcasm aside... yesterday, i told a couple of you that i had two final, very little requests of ep6: i wanted to see Jon crying (because i had read the leaks, and thus i knew what to expect) and i wanted to see those beautiful curls freed from the bun. and i got this. i got to see, FINALLY, after weeks, Jon Snow and not Agony Targaryen. loyal to the end, struggling with the cruel decision he had to make, quoting master Aemon, accepting his fate, doing his duty no matter the cost --- as he once did with Ygritte. if we look at this episode only, i got everything i ever hoped for, and for this i am grateful. and yet...

2. we cannot look at s08 ep6 on its own

          and this is where it all begins and ends. because ep6 does not exist on its own. does not exist in a void. nothing of what happened came out of spontaneous generation. Dany wasn’t suddenly the mad queen. Tyrion wasn’t suddenly clever again. Grey Worm wasn’t suddenly thirsty for blood and revenge. Jon Snow wasn’t suddenly Jon Snow and not Agony Targaryen. and this is why everything in this season is irredeemable to me, no matter how much i loved Jon’s finale if we look at it objectively and pragmatically.

          do you know why i love George’s writing so much? it’s not for the prose --- very honestly, 90% of the persons i roleplay with write better than him. it’s not completely for the storyline, either, though it is amazing --- very honestly, some of the book chapters are boring and long and fillers and with descriptions and details that no one cares about. i love George’s writing, however, for his absolutely brilliant talent to manage such a vast universe. he’s got so many major characters, thrice as many minor characters, even more characters that only appear at the end of the books, listed as part of the great houses and such. the experience of reading A Song of Ice and Fire, and least for me, was that --- you get to a point you lose track of what’s going on, exactly because there is SO MUCH going on. so many characters, so many stories, so many destinies. and i remember myself often asking: how the hell will some of this make sense in the end, this is huge and so complex. and then... then you get to A Dance with Dragons... and, fuck, it does make sense. ALL of it starts tying together. all the details, all the little plot twists, all the symbolism, all the foreshadowing --- it all comes around and ties together, it all makes sense. all these many, many parts come together in a whole --- and this is why i praise George so much. this is why i admire his writing so much. because, even if i am upset with some choices, it all makes sense. it all is fluid, coherent, so pleasing to read and to follow and so goddamn captivating.

          and then you look at s07 and especially s08... and you find nothing of this. where George does kill a lot of characters, he keeps the bulk of them and considers all of them --- and D&D simply kill them all off for not having any better use for them. where George writes intricate, complex, layered characters and 99% of them are purely made of grey areas and grey morals and so very few are completely good or completely evil --- and D&D turned them completely flat, shallow, predictable, cliché, borderline boring if not downright so. where George named this the world of ice and fire and makes it so that the big, overarching theme is flawed, very different humans trying to gather together to survive the common, legendary foe --- D&D were done with the Long Night in like 40 minutes, and the only thing dark about it was the terrible lighting that makes iconing ep3 a nightmare. and i could go on, but i think i’ve made my point. D&D haven’t the 10th of George’s talent --- and, hey, i can accept this. -i- don’t have the 10th of George’s talent for sure, and very few people in this world have the 10th of George’s talent when it comes to tying together such a huge, deep, complex plot. and i can live with this. i could live with predictable, cliché writing in s07, and still be able to enjoy it at least half the time. i wasn’t happy, but i was content.

          but s08? well. s08, the way i see it, was simply two things: 1) D&D trying to be George and trying to go for plot twists and trying to make a bittersweet ending of some sort... and then 2) D&D realizing they are as far from George as the Earth is from Pluto, and going fuck it we’ll resolve everything based on shock value. and i wish i was joking or exaggerating or being sarcastic --- but they have stated this themselves and are proud of it, apparently. you only have to google it and you’ll easily find it. these two gentlemen looked at, say, Daenerys, and asked themselves: we want her to be the mad queen in the end, what can we do to lead to this outcome? and they did it. it’s as simple and as linear as this. and literally everything and everyone, logic and common sense included, gets thrown under the rubble for the sake of making this happen. and this is why i have zero respect and zero credits for them, at the end of all things, even if i did love Jon’s finale when i look at it isolated from everything else.

because.

          yes, Jon Snow, the honorable man with a good, kind, merciful heart who does whatever needs to be done for the sake of his people, no matter the toll it takes on himself. check, this is the Jon i know and love. Jon Snow, not a glorified savior who succeeds where everyone else fails, not Azor Ahai reborn, but a tool, an instrument used to bring salvation --- Lightbringer itself. check, this is the Jon i know and love. Jon Snow, who was never destined for a happy ending, carrying the guilt and suffering the consequences of his decisions. check, this is the Jon i know and love. but what happened before this? what about everything that led him to this? 

          book!Jon and show!Jon were always different, this isn’t a new thing. even during seasons 1-5, where the show followed the book canon for the most part (at least in Jon’s case), they were already different. show!Jon has a lot more personal agency, in that he chooses to do a lot of the things he does --- while book!Jon tends to get sucked into the whole ordeal, and he tries to navigate it as well as he can. for an example: show!Jon offered himself to go with Qhorin Halfhand, book!Jon was chosen by Qhorin and caught by surprise and even lord commander Mormont was like ????. another example: show!Jon sends Grenn to hold the gate against Mag the Mighty and brings on himself the responsibility of commanding the Wall during the attack, book!Jon gets command imposed on him by Donal Noye and then again in the morning by master Aemon. again, i could go on and on, but i have made my point. regarding all this, while i do prefer book!Jon, i never hated show!Jon. some parts, even, like the battle at Hardhome, i honestly loved and i wish i could get that POV in the books.

          now, s06... post-revival. this is where the books-show rift happens for good, as they ran out of source material. very sincerely, i did not watch s06 as a whole --- i only watched Jon’s scenes. so if you ask me what was going on otherwise, i don’t know and i don’t really regret this choice. s06 Jon is a sort of limbo for me, because i cannot say if his portrayal was good or bad. clearly, this is when he starts making stupid decisions and being far more reckless, but... as mentioned, this is post-revival. this is a man who was stabbed in the heart by his own sworn brothers, who got wrenched back out of the grave, who immediately got told: hey you gotta keep fighting and you gotta start by going and reclaiming Winterfell and saving your little brother. given this context, can i judge him for not being himself? i can’t and i never did, which is why i accepted s06 (again, re: Jon Snow only) for what it was. and i was content with it, even if the revelation of his parentage for show!canon did not impress me.

          s07. this coincided with the birth and infancy of my blog, and honestly i was so excited to get to share this experience with everyone --- and this much was absolutely amazing. i was writing my Master’s thesis back then and i had a lot more free time, so i was able to stay up late and watch it live... and, boy, was that a ride. i had so much fun back then, and all of it thanks to my beautiful followers and friends who were there to live through this with me. but as far as the season itself went... yeah, that was the beginning of the end. because, unlike s06, Jon didn’t have excuses anymore to be stupid and reckless. and yet he still was. he still just grabbed a bunch of sturdy men and ventured into the fucking Frostfangs in the middle of winter without even bringing 1 (one) horse, just to name the most blatant of stupid examples. and the whole glorified superhero savior vibe? my good beans, i wrote a meta with 4000+ words to justify why that frozen lake scene was total bullshit and why Jon did die his second death there --- exactly out of spite for how much i hated it. how much i hated that D&D were turning the boy i love into a commercial protagonist who does the impossible and suffers no consequences and gets to have everyone else’s portrayal tossed under the wreck for the sake of glorifying him further. Rickon was already a plot device, Benjen Stark was a plot device, and i had the sinking feeling it would not stop there. s07 had bad and lazy writing, was terribly rushed and with very little character development, was pointing towards a very obvious and very cliché ending: Jon & Dany, the power couple, sitting the throne, having a baby, living happily ever after.

          and today... today i ask myself: how can you fuck up a plot so much, to the point where i wish i was made to see this cliché, predictable ending instead? i spent a year and a half whining about how much i did not want to see Jon sitting the throne... only to now look at the finale and be like --- sweet summer child, what did you know of fear. because, hey, yes, Jon was reborn from his ashes and Agony was cast aside and he got exactly the endgame i prayed for --- but at what cost? to get here, i had to see ALL the northern lords and half his family spitting on him for his decision to bend the knee. to get here, i had to see him literally say: it’s true, my name is Aegon Targayen. to get here, i had to see him avoiding Dany and not having the balls to talk to her about it until the very last moment. i had to see him plan the defenses of Winterfell like a complete stupid idiot who has no clue what he is doing. i had to see him forgetting Ghost is his soulmate. i was even deprived of the thing i love more in Kit’s acting, which is fighting on the ground --- for the sake of an epic dragon battle, yes, but that by rights he should not have survived. i was denied a one-on-one battle with the Night King, no matter who’d win and no matter who’d get to destroy the NK in the end. i got an epic moment of him roaring back at an undead dragon, yes, but what came in the next episodes got me to the point of headcanoning that he died during that moment. i had to see him not even mourn Edd’s death and going for Lyanna Mormont gods know why, who openly questioned and defied him. i had to see him being the by-the-book definition of a douchebag who sits drinking with friends and completely ignoring his girl who’d just lost one of her closest loved ones and was so clearly dissociating throughout that entire feast. i had to see him being described as so stupid that he obviously bent the knee for love and Dany was going to play him like a fiddle. i had to see him practically being made to choose between his family and the girl he loves. I HAD TO SEE HIM ABANDONING GHOST. i had to see him, again, pull away from Dany when she needed him most --- and, yes, in show!canon it is incest and all that, but you don’t have to fuck or kiss the girl you love to be there for her. i was denied, again, 1 (one) decent fighting scene on the ground because all he did at KL was to cut down a few soldiers with a few basic slashes.

          and, very frankly, what bothers and disgusts me the most out of all of this hellhole... i had to see character after character ruined, completely ruined in their essence, for the sake of stating: hey Jon Snow is a good guy! Rhaegal, who had to be butchered for the sake of triggering Dany and also because Dany and Jon and Tyrion were too stupid to remember Euron’s fleet still existed.  Missandei, who had to be butchered in chains for the sake of triggering Dany. Grey Worm, who had to be metaphorically butchered and turned into a blood-thirsty savage longing for blind revenge for the sake of Agony Targaryen, our lord and savior, being the merciful savior who claims pity for unarmed men. the women of King’s Landing, who had to be raped by northern soldiers, again for the sake of Agony being the good guy who saves one of them. and at the end of the day... Daenerys Targaryen. the little girl who wanted to go home and return to her house with a red door. who was exiled and sold and raped and harassed and humiliated and abused and betrayed and used and objectified. who made terrible choices more than once, yes and i erase none of them, but who made them with a good intention and who paid the price of said choices --- like Jon himself did, like we all, flawed human beings, do. the strong, willful, kind woman who heard Jon’s plea for help and went to save him and his men beyond the Wall and who lost one of her children for it. the queen who wanted to break the wheel and to make this world a better place. the breaker of shackles. Mhysa. she, who was never her father. reduced to this, for the sake of making Jon Snow the good honorable man who does his duty even at expense of his own interest and his own happiness.

          dear Mr. Daniel B. Weiss and dear Mr. David Benioff: do you know since when Jon Snow is a good honorable man who does his duty even at expense of his own interest and his own happiness? since always. since 283 AC. since far, far before you got your incompetent, untalented hands on him. and he never needed to be shown as one --- he was one. without the need to sacrifice 90% of the plot and the characters to make him seem so. he IS so. and this is why i’ll never forgive you, even if you did give me exactly the finale i wanted. because what you did to him, in order to bring him here? honestly, you deserve no redemption. ever. and if there is one thing that makes me extremely, utterly, earnestly happy today, it is that never again you will touch him. Jon Snow belongs to George, and he belongs to me, and he belongs to every beautiful talented roleplayer who writes him, and he belongs to every beautiful talented roleplayer who writes muses who interact with him. never to you, again. and for this i thank the old gods of the forest. today, Jon Snow is finally at rest. and, as of today, i can finally stop writing out of spite --- and return to writing because i love this boy.

[soloscribbles]

Over the Love

[ Leon Kennedy x F.O.S Agent!Fem!Reader. Eventual Married! Leon x Reader. Begins some time between RE2 and RE4. ] 

Summary: You have Leon to thank for everything turning out the way it did, so you’re determined (‘too personally determined’, the other agents say) to watch over him in your own way.

Progress: 1 / ??

Title inspiration: Over the Love by Florence + The Machine

  You’re not suited for being an agent on the ground, shooting at any kind of moving targets and being in those kinds of situations. You’re not stupid by any means, but the heat of battle isn’t where your abilities shine. Which is precisely why when the U.S government official was sitting across from you offering you a ‘deal’ - more like an enforcement considering they added that you can’t return back to being normal after what you saw - you didn’t hesitate to suggest something less...intense than being an agent like Leon. Your former employment centered more on information and communications, so it felt natural to have you trained to be an F.O.S agent instead. You fit in like a glove after the training period was finished.

  Your supervisors also feel that it makes sense to pair you up with Leon Kennedy for your first communications mission. After all, when it comes to establishing a connection, you both had a hell of a ride doing that back at your (currently blown up) former employer - a pharmaceutical company that bit off more than it could chew with its t-virus sample. And by ‘connection’, you clearly remember Leon clearing away the infected with his weaponry while you played it smart and stayed away from the danger. ( Which basically meant hiding behind him or running away from anything that tried to kill you. ) The help you did offer was knowledge - layout of the facility, names, timeline of events, solutions to any puzzles - with the times being that you stepped in during the violence was to shove or stab one of the infected that were trying to kill Leon. 

  So, to have this be your first mission makes you feel like you’re paying him back for watching over you during that time even if looking back on it he could have just left you behind. Your finger presses the button the communication device, initiating your first contact with Leon in a while. You saw him once after being brought in for questioning, and it was only a brief chance for him to put a hand on your shoulder to comfort you. 

  The screen changes to his face and you can’t help the small smile the blossoms on your lips. It’s comforting to see him again.

  “It’s you,” he breathes out. This is definitely unexpected for him.

  “Agent Kennedy,” you say, giving him a nod, “I’m going to be your support this time around.”

  “Didn’t expect you to be helping me out like this,” he replies, letting out a little chuckle. 

  “It’s different this time, y’know. I’m not right behind you now, but I’ll still be assisting you in whatever way I can.” You sit back slightly in your chair. “I’ve already compiled some preliminary information to give you while I keep searching for anything new to update you on. Take some time to read through it before it’s time for guns to be blazing.”

  “Got it. Thanks.” There’s an odd beat of silence. “How are you doing?”

  The question throws off guard, wiping the smile off of your face instantly. Nobody’s actually asked you that and when you take a moment to mull it over you don’t think you are. 

  How do you tell Leon that, though? That it’s hard to go to bed at night because even the comfort of a bed doesn’t keep the nightmares away? That the figure of your jacket on a chair can terrify you because you think it’s a monster? That daily life has essentially been ripped out of your hands by other people, leaving you unable to breathe in the middle of broad daylight? You can’t. Even if he can understand more than anyone else. 

  You force on a smile. It hurts your face. “I’m doing fine, all things considered.”

  Another series of pauses follow. He goes to open his mouth again but you’re quick to the punch, hoping to block him from delving any further into your feelings. He’s being too kind in your opinion and while in another situation you’d feel relaxed it only stirs up a tightening in your chest. You deflect his intentions.

  “I wanted to say thank you,” you cut him off. “I didn’t get the chance before but seriously...Thank you.” 

  “You’re thanking me for saving you? What else was I supposed to do? Leave you there?”

  You laugh silently. “You could have.” Like your old co-workers did. “But that’s not how you are, I guess. Anyway, I can’t keep you from your mission. Good luck, Agent Kennedy.”

  “Right.”

  The transmission ends there. 

  When his transmission request comes through, you both had already shared a couple conversations prior to it. They were mostly standard - exchanging information and getting updates on his well-being and how far along the mission was going. There was the occasional joke thrown in or snappy remark but it was to ease the tension for the both of you. You two naturally flow that way, defaulting to such a speech style because that’s how you are. It works wonders for you since when you’re not talking to Leon you’re either checking his location or worrying yourself to mental exhaustion despite the rational side of you listing reasons over and over about why he’ll come out alive. 

  You accept the request without any hesitation. 

  “Status update?” You ask.

  “Mission complete. I’m moving to the extraction point,” he says, holding up a silver box with the target. 

  “Good deal. I’ll let them know you’re on the way.” You give another smile. “Good work. Looks like you’ll be back sooner than we predicted, too.”

  “Yeah. You know-” The smirk he gives you causes you to throw him a suspicious look. What’s he going to say? You’re not quite sure what to expect with him. “You’re looking pretty good like this. You free anytime soon?”

  Your mind blanks. That’s so unexpected. 

  You try your best to remember if there was ever a point before that he tried to pull something like this with you. Well, now that you think about it, even if he did, you would have been too frightened of the infected beings to even give it any kind of attention or a split second thought. You take what he says seriously, though. ( When you end the transmission later, you realize he’s probably messing around with you and doesn’t earnestly view you as a romantic option. You’d think it odd from your perspective. )

  Your feelings towards Leon can best be summed up as ‘thankful’. You have respect and admiration for him, but he’s someone that protected you so you have a hard time seeing him in anything outside of that light. You like him and, of course he has his charming points, but you’re not sure enough if anything you feel is considered romantic. At least for right now. 

  You recover from the surprise and send him a smug grin, resting your face in your palm. Even if there’s nothing romantic on your end, you decide to have some fun anyway. It can’t hurt after all. 

  “Come back later and try again, Agent Kennedy.”

[ Author’s Note: Hey, everyone! I’m a new writer for this series! I hope that you all enjoyed this and please give me any kind of feedback. Did you like it? Did you hate it? 

  I can’t really elaborate on what Leon and the reader’s past relationship is, but I’m sure you all figured it out based on what I gave you. I wanted to give something a little different for this story. Something a little fresh with the reader not being the action person but still helpful, y’know? 

  Thank you for reading! ]

[kiriti2009]

Dear America: Preserve These Things For The Love Of God

They say that in Europe our things are tiny and that in America your things are super-sized, and that’s a dangerous statement, prone to error when referring to anything other than the size of our Coca-Colas.

Any further debate could lead to a conflict of unprecedented proportions and distract us from the real issue: Here in Europe we are jealous of a lot of what you have in the United States of America. In particular, three things: God, liberty and civil society. In the social democratic Europe we live in, these three pillars have all but disappeared like the sun setting at the dusk of a civilization. In their stead we are left with secularism, conditional freedom and an all-encompassing state that demands money from us day and night in the form of taxes, while all we can do is shrug our shoulders, pay up and say, as did Bartleby: “I’d prefer no to.”

I write these lines, sit in a German alehouse “Cervecería Alemana” in Plaza Santa Ana in Madrid, an old cafe in which the dazzling Ava Gardner whittled away hours when she was living in Madrid, and in which Hemingway often sought refuge in good beer and beautiful people common to so many other bars in Europe. Midway through the 20th century another celebrated writer would also sit here. The Spaniard, Enrique Jardiel Poncela, was a successful comedian that, just over 30, relocated to the United States to write scripts for Fox studios.

He had such a penchant for tucking himself away in a bar in Madrid to write, that they had to build his office in Hollywood to resemble one, for him to be inspired. Jardiel hated the Hollywood vibe and on returning to Spain said that Americans were like “big kids,” although I’m not sure that’s actually a criticism. He also wrote that if a European wanted to understand America, he would have to buy, on arrival there, a “Bible, an automobile and a corkscrew.”

The corkscrew bit troubles me, even though these were the ’30s. By the way, his epitaph read: “If you want everyone to praise you, die.” When he did die, before his corpse had grown cold, everyone did praise him. And immediately afterward, not having ever displayed any political affiliation, everyone forgot about him. If there is anything this brilliant Spanish comedian got right, it was to be free, gaining himself enmity from both left and right. The European press has never been made for freedom, which is nothing other than the ability to say and do whatever you want and the strength to shoulder the consequences.

A student reaches for an inflated globe during a “Fridays for Future” protest for urgent climate action on May 24, 2019 in Muenster, northwestern Germany.

We envy almost everything about the press in America, from its independence from the government to the bravery shown by many of its greatest journalists, often opting for honor in harakiri — in ink — when the cause is a worthy one; sometimes it’s a sad collective suicide, like when they try to portray Nancy Pelosi as a rising star in the practice of origami. But even a despicable silver-screen villain like Walter Matthau from “The Front Page” captivates us, because in his madness we find an apt description of the wild press that was needed to create the brilliant myth of pressrooms littered by whisky filled flasks, and incredibly unstable individuals trying to keep the government at bay. 

Half the things that opinion-makers in the States would make the secular public in secular Europe shake in their boots and cross themselves, and that’s another thing that you got right: It’s important to call an imbecile an imbecile if you don’t you run the risk of confusing the public. And nothing describes the average European: confused and stunned. We’re not even well-manipulated à la Soviet, because even though the left wing tries whenever it can, the European center-right works ceaselessly toward that postmodern sickness called appeasement.

The outcome is that the right wing receives the brunt of the insults, the left being better liars, and nobody can freely say whatever they want in a newspaper without first reading carefully the European Single Thought Law. There are 70 million Twitter users just waiting to write your column, coming close to choking on their own bile as they spit insults at you, while your own contribution to social unrest is safely censored. If you’re right wing, they’ll come down on you like a ton of bricks.

To disagree, to think freely, to stand out, is to dig your own grave in modern Europe. There is a very European bias toward the bureaucratic structuring of private initiatives that becomes truly exasperating. Even in love.

Maybe because of liberty, the United States helps people become millionaires while Europe hinders them. Sometimes quite embarrassingly so. Just one example. Spain’s new social communist government has threatened to cripple rich people with taxes. As a result, an exodus to Portugal has begun. What does this government do? Rectify? No. They threaten with consequences against those leaving. This is all we could expect from a government whose vice president criticizes and insults the owner of Inditex, my brilliant fellow countryman Amancio Ortega, for having donated expensive, latest generation cancer treatment machines, to Spanish hospitals. According to Spanish Vice President Pablo Iglesias, the Spanish public health service doesn’t need “handouts” from the rich. Maybe he’s right. But the Spanish cancer patients sure do. Some people just keep proving Jardiel Poncelaright again when he said: “Those that don’t dare to be intelligent, become politicians.” There are exceptions, but they’re not in Pedro Sánchez’s government.

Spanish far-left Podemos party leader Pablo Iglesias gives a speech during the first day of the parliamentary investiture debate to vote through a prime minister, at the Spanish Congress (Las Cortes) on July 22, 2019, in Madrid.

As a rule, the States’ civil society is healthier than the European because it’s careful not to devote itself to mass ideological prostitution. I said “mass,” I’m not here to naively canonise the whole country, ignoring that you’ve had presidents whose main virtue was knowing how to dance salsa. But even then it’s different. Your genuinely democratic culture — impossible to export– makes it easy to get rid of cretins that manage to reach office.

In Europe, the more independent civic leaders raise their voices and lead all they can, but only until they’re gobbled up by one party or another. Then they become accommodated and their voices become muddled. That might very well be the problem: this very European obsession with security, be it employment, unemployment, social life, housing or relationships. Everything has to be as secure and predictable as German engineering, which is why there exists a certain disdain for the American dream. If America can be reduced to a hamburger, part of the European elite can be reduced to the unassembled pieces of a wardrobe from Ikea; if they ever manage to get it together, in an armed conflict, you’ll find me on the hamburger’s side.

Somehow mobility and meritocracy muddy the social democrat dream, which as with communism, needs poor and hungry to survive. Sometimes I wonder why modern Europeans are so enthusiastic about living when most of their state tutored, predictable and bureaucratic lives are a bore. Obviously Mediterranean Europe is the exception; boredom is impossible there.

All of this has a tragic consequence. The lack of a sense of humor extends like a plague throughout the continent. Europe has lost its sense of humor and that’s it’s drama. You only need see that safety warnings printed on any appliance produced in the European Union to understand how total safety and security is an illness. You can’t take your job so seriously. If you sell phone batteries, don’t place a warning on them, in 10 different languages, asking the buyer not to nibble on it. Don’t make a fool of yourself in 10 different languages. The legal cobweb covering the Old Continent making you do it is no excuse. Exporting illegal batteries is better than looking like a world-class idiot all over the world.

But Europe takes itself too seriously. Everything is regulated in its pocket-sized nations. Everything is vital. Everything is serious. Everything is exceedingly dull. Americans can joke and laugh about filling some dictator full of holes without tearing their hair out and crying, which is exactly what the French, Belgian or the Danes do. The Dutch aren’t laughing so loud this week because some genius in the government has decided it would be a good idea to legalize an anti–old people pill. Suddenly, Dutch progressive OAPs, that have been smoking spliffs since their teens, feel less enthusiastic about death-dealing because they’ve realized that in this year’s Halloween parties they will be the dead.

Incidentally, proof of Europe’s idiotization is that, given a choice as to what we import from the United States, instead of choosing liberty, wealth or the size of the damn ice in our drinks, we chose Halloween, which we would gladly send back to you in a box with its corresponding bow and a thank-you note “always thinking of you.”

Something else we envy. When a policeman shoots down a dangerous terrorist, you all ask how the policeman is and swell with pride over his heroism. In Europe though, public opinion and the media react differently:

Couldn’t he have spared the man’s life?

Was it proportional?

Did he read him his rights?

He wasn’t gunned down for wearing explosives and six machetes, he was murdered for being an Arab.

The same happens with military ops. If no one botches it, America will still rally behind their military when they are deployed, even if there has been political dissent. These small shows of unison that upstage the differences, around basic issues, are what make a nation great. Small things can be huge.

Maybe because Americans don’t believe that the state will save them, and much less guarantee them everlasting life within the foreseeable future, they still choose to trust in God. And that’s understandable. When one sees Bernie Sanders and thinks, if an electoral catastrophe were to occur, that one’s life would be in his hands, it’s a huge relief to know you always have God to save you.

What’s more, God is present daily in the lives of men that, as with any civilization, want to transcend their own arrogance. Which is why, when a politician finishes speaking with a “God bless America!” no one is surprised or shocked. It even sounds good, magnificent, glorious. On the other hand, in Europe, if one finishes his speech with a “God bless Sweden!” or “God bless Denmark!” it just doesn’t work. It’s almost like saying “God bless the International Monetary Fund!” It doesn’t even sound good. What’s more you’ll instantly see people rise from their seats and call out:

Why do you say “God”? I’m an atheist. It’s offensive.

Why do you say “God” and not Goddess? Chauvinist! It’s offensive.

Why do you say “God” and not Mother Nature? I identify as a rabbit. Ethnocentrist! It’s offensive.

In the end you just give up, leave God out of it, but reference Satan because you want to send the whole world to hell. But then, once more, another uproar, like a cat fight on Twitter: Christianocentric! Islamophobe. Allah is great. It’s offensive. That’s when you decide to put an end to the event and hang yourself in a toilet stall. That’s how things are in Europe.

Of course, Europe also has the History, it’s still at the origin of our civilization, illustrious ruins, Spanish literature, British humor, Houllebecq and Swedish women. But it also has its fair share of disappointments. France was supposed to be fun. All of my damned bohemians burned Paris down between opium dens, poetry and whisky. It was all just an illusion. These days their grandchildren don’t go out at night, they only read the state’s Official Bulletin and instead of alcohol, they down copious amounts of ecological tea in vegan tea shops where they extract the tea by caressing the leaves.

What about Spain? My country is another matter. Spaniards are only Europeans during work hours. From six in the afternoon onward — Brussels time — we stop being European and we do whatever we feel like until 8 a.m. the next day. This makes other Europeans feel awkward when they come to do business here. They would much prefer to see a hoard of fools following one another mindlessly through the streets like Lemmings, that strange video game from the ’80s. I mean they would rather be in Berlin than Madrid. We don’t do it because we love partying, but to safeguard the essence of ancient Europe, when Romans would commit the seven deadly sins all together, leave work mid-afternoon for a siesta and always found an excuse for a toast (not the bread one). Our sacred duty as Spaniards is to keep these worthy traditions alive, whatever Brussels says.

It’s not that Europe is a bad idea, just the same as the — oh so different — United States isn’t either. Europe, and I mean the European Union, is a place where we can sit down and talk instead of being gunned down and invaded. It has its benefits, especially in what concerns public spending on weapons. But neither Americans nor Europeans can permit themselves to be complacent. Europe needs to recover its identity or Brexit will be just the beginning, and America needs to keep an eye on what’s happening over here, because no one’s immune to a plague of stupid people corrupting the power. Although I suspect that in the end, whatever happens in the future, here in Europe, we’ll always be jealous of the size of your missiles, Reagan’s politics, Scarlett Johansson’s beauty, George Clooney’s elegance and having a president who tweets all in caps.