#also a lot of my other posts I think are funnier than these
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no promises anymoooooreeeee i'll appear online when i appear online 😭 every time i say "ooh i think life is almost done being overwhelming!" it. becomes even more overwhelming in the dumbest ways. all i can manage rn when i'm not stressing myself into a shut-down state is staring at the wall while listening to youtube essays + mindlessly crocheting.
i might queue up ppls art and fics w/o commentary in the tags... i want other ppl to see what all of my cool friends have made, but i genuinely can't think right now with this monstrous brain fog. i'm really sorry, just. yeah. maybe i'll think of some way to make it up later!!! once the dust has settled!!!! but until then i wuv u and miss u. smiles.
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[venting in tags including familial manipulation and ableism. i. didn't mean to write all of that, thiss was originally going to be a main blog post but. aaaaaAAAAAA!!!!!
also no need for replies or anything, i'd turn them off for just the one post if i could kjsndkn, i just needed to get things out and go eep jsjndsfdn ok bye bye bye bye!!!!]
#goddd my family finds it sooooooo funny that i can't do basic tasks! it's soooo funny that i can't even think of a horror movie to watch#on halloween bc i genuinely can't remember a single one right now. it's soooo funny that i can't take cardboard boxes or#old furniture out of my room without help bc i've physically and mentally and emotionally burnt out for Months.#and me not being able to move shit out after two (2) days makes me a hoarder somehow. and ofc hoarding is a moral failing#and my mom has to give me a stern talking-to about hoarding things... that were. again. in my room for 2 days....#[tbc it isnt a moral failing no matter the reason. life is hard and things happen and it can be hard to get rid of things for Reasons.]#nevermind them making constant snide remarks about me using ugly 'mismatched' desk / storage furniture. bc it was free / cheap? no income??#AND!!!!! i have a couple of new diagnoses. which doesn't change much day to day but it does make my family making fun of me#even more dumbfounding. like. this explains a lot of really scary unexplained symptoms that constantly leave me#housebound for weeks but uhhh haha hehe hoho??? so silly so funny that i'm barely conscious for multiple weeks???#and you can see that i'm getting worse but that makes it funnier??? hmm!!!#also nevermind that i've told them the exact reason why i've been like this (read: them) but that ALSO makes it funnier somehow.#but i also can't say shit bc they're doing something ~nice~ for me (out of convenience + after almost a decade of 'don't get comfortable'#and 'don't decorate this room bc it isn't yours' and 'you need to be ready to move out by x date'#only for the date to arrive and them to pull the 'i never said that. and if i did say it i didn't mean it like that.#and if i did mean it like that i don't anymore.' card. + any big renovations are things they wanted anyway. hmmmm!!#and how i have to do all of the phys labor alone bc if i ask for help i get made fun of!!! and yelled at that i'm doing things Wrong#(hint: i'm following instructions to the letter but. my family knows better than those silly things!! ^^ ))#jfc i sure did rant. uh. yeah. things. are really weird and uncomfy and i feel thankful that i finally can have my own things on display#outside of closets and bins again after a decade?? but i'm also waiting for the other shoe to drop / them to tell me i owe them in#some way??? bc that's how it works. 'i'm doing a nice thing you didn't even ask me for so now you have to do whatever i tell you to.'#meanwhile i can't even maladaptive daydream my way through it bc my brain is soup right now. can't remember basic things abt#my interests bc i've been on negative battery / spoons for a couple of months straight and it's only getting worse.#OKAY TLDR i'm not in a state to do anything until everything irl gets settled. and i'm trying So Hard to get it all over with but there's#only so much i can do in a day before i completely shut down. i didn't even get into the insurance stuff i've been fighting too ughhhh.#so if i show up on here in short spurts -- hi! bye! hi!! i wuv and care u!!! hope youre well mwah mwah!!!!!!! i'll post what i can and then#disappear when i need to recharge. it is what it is. i need to try to sleep now... uh if this post disappears when i wake up.... yeah......#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]#vent -
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i am one day late to my own character’s birthday but whatever better late than never. this image popped up in my head last night and I felt obligated to make it
for context Tornado is the name of the only social networking site on fincg island and C.C. is. very into the occult and would definitely think this is a halfway decent thing to do (it is not)
og
#pdbc#tag ramble INCOMING 💥💥💥💥💥#I don’t post about CC enough I think….a lot of you (the very few of you who are following the PDBC lore lmao) probably don’t remember her#I think I posted about her once and that was with a very beta design. she is changed now. more obvious that she’s fishkin now#anyway she’s wonderful. love her. she looks menacing here but she’s one of the more. not horrible characters lmao#her worst crimes are just being insensitive by accident I guess. and maybe enabling an absolute monster of a person but whatever#her lore is kinda underdeveloped unfortunately but it is being developed bit by bit#she’s like. really into the phonetic alphabet for some reason. fitting considering she’s an Oscar fish and o is Oscar#also as you can see in this stupid image. her last name is technically whisky but she doesn’t go by it ever#but its whisky bc 1. whiskey is W in the phonetic alphabet and 2. it means water of life#and yknow. she’s a fish. fish live in water. given human life. a good enough name ig#spirits and other stereotypically occult creatures and the like are very common so she likes to hang out with them#most people have a sort of spirit like being that shadows them called a wraith that are meant to protect you (basically plot armor lmao)#but her wraith is fallen meaning she is. completely on her own in a universe where bad things Will happen all the time#so she has ghost buddies for support! even the infamous piss ghost and sizzle ghost#pretty good at communicating with them I’d say. most people don’t bother because they find ghosts and spirits annoying :(#anyway though she’s clearly mistaken here because bellona. did not go to heaven 🥰 whoops#there’s more context than that but I think it’s funnier to leave it as that lmao just know she is Not having a heavenly birthday#also I don’t think I’ve ever talked about Tornado? it’s a very minor lore piece so I don’t think I ever bothered mentioning it#and if I did eh oh well. it’s pretty much the only social media that’s allowed on the island#it came to me in a dream so obviously I made it canon bc that’s where the best ideas come from#the app’s color scheme is mainly lavender and has an overall. as one could expect. tornadic theme to it#(tornadoes are very common on fincg island and also I find tornadoes fascinating so i think it’s cool but it’s really not 💀)#it has a ton of bizarre and useless features that nobody would ever need but they’re there anyway#my favorite is the medication vortex. you can click on someone’s profile and see what meds they’re on lmafo#you don’t have to fill out that information field but a lot do just for the goofs#its moderation team consists of two people. thankfully for them there aren’t really that many users#although sometimes the site is flooded by cryptic messages that are actually a cry for help from one of the mods but. oh well#anyway enough rambling goodnight
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actually US english spellchecker i don't care that meagre isn't spelled that way over here. i don't care if it's not spelled that way ANYWHERE. that's the way the word is supposed to be spelled. Cause i said so.
#listen nothing helped my dyslexia worse than growing up in a heavily UK fandom simultaneously as i was in a bunch of anime fandoms#my english is Questionable At Best and it's basically the only language i know#but also Words Look Ways and meagre is spelled meagre because that's the way the word looks!#i'm not wrong about this and you can't make me take it back#this post brought to you by#sudden deep irritation because i saw someone else spell it meagre and i went YEAH OKAY I'M NOT LIKE WRONG-WRONG#and i got real fussy about it#because being fussy about the spelling of english words (a crapshoot at best) is a lot easier than stressing out about the fact that#i'm having surgery this month? and also the other several hundred things on my mind#it's a lot funnier to be upset at the way words are spelled too#i've never had surgery before. not... not this kind of surgery. just for getting out my impacted widsom teeth#and i want it! it's elective! i do want to do this and it is important to me to get it done!#but it's also... y'know. scary and it's not even the scariest thing i've had on my mind#i've been too scared about other things to be scared about my surgery and i don't think that's actually a good thing i think i should be#a little better prepared anxiety-wise for my fucking first ever real hospital surgery actually#i need to go through several stages of panic so i can be Mostly Settled by the time the day comes
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✨ShadowPeach Bio Parents Bio AU Q&A! 28/09✨
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Welcome to the Q&A! A space where I can answer related or similar question about the Shadowpeach Bio Parents AU! If you submitted your ask anonimously, then you’ll have to check the whole post if it’s answered here, if it’s not, worry not! Your asks might have been used for a future comic or just in the queue~
Anonimo ha chiesto: I am going to ask you to make a difficult decision… freenoodles or Shadowpeach
(Freenoodles, in my opinion, is just barely better than shadowpeach. Just because of how gay they are in season five. I mean, look at them and tell me they aren’t married.)
Sooo I go with shadowpeach. Freenoodle is like my comfort shit. so many cute and funny shenanigans, for me they are just the married couple who would probably have the healtiest of the relationship. They have teh experience, they went already throught all the "obliviouss-ness" and the "what if they don't love me" yadda yadda.
But Shadowpeach. Ow man. I thought the ineffable housband ship was complex. but god. oh god. how wrong I was. like- these two went from friends, to brothers, to lovers, to enemies, to friends again and to be lover again. They fucked up so much nothing will ever be the same. But they still weak for each other. They are at each other throat and also they know the other in the most intimate way. they are immortal. One of them fucking killed the other. They thought the other left them and betrayed and went both drama to forget (one choose found family, the other murder but anyway-)
Like- WHAT SHIP CAN BE MORE COMPLEX THAN THIS?????
Anonimo ha chiesto: Does MK have a favorite between his bio parents
oUH NO POOR MONKEYS. He doesn't, but he has a favourite depending on the context. Like, for training he prefers Macaque because he explains a lot better than Wukong, but sparring with Wukong is much funnier, but he prefers Macaque scratches and grooming, but he loves Wukong squeezing hugs, etc...
Anonimo ha chiesto: You know, I just realized something. So you know how people in the fandom give Macaque lotus nicknames since his ears kind of resemble lotus flowers. Well since MK has both Wukong and Macaque's ears that kind of makes MK's ears resemble Peace Lilies (which is kind of ironic since MK is the Harbinger of Chaos)
Aww I guess they do look like them!
Anonimo ha chiesto: I may sound a little to mean but Mk din't suspect a thing aout macaques eye? he has multiple forms were his eye is a cross i mean, i would think smt happend to that eye but that just me uu I LOVE UR ART IT MAKES ME WANT TO KMS /POS
He surely suspected something happened to Mac eye but he didn't know how that happened.
@queen-of-purple-roses ha chiesto: I have a question and you don’t have to answer it if you don’t have too; since we’ve seen Macaque feel guilty with how he treated MK in the past, does Monkey King feel guilty about all the dangerous moments that MK was put in, since most if not all of the fighting ends up on MK’s plate and not Wukong’s.
Oh absolutely, the more time passes he feels more and more guilty.
@catbox730 ha chiesto: Can we get more MK and Red Son please
mayyyyyybe. If you guys behave
Anonimo ha chiesto: It would be funny seeing MK‘s dads going to a doctor with him for like getting his wisdom teeth removed or something xD
The parents being extremely worried that something will go wrong while MK is super chill. When the dentist comes out of the operating room they grab him and ask him if he survived while MK is just eating ice cream post-surgery.
Anonimo ha chiesto: Will MK ever fight against one of his parents in a serious battle ? Or be forced to fight one of them ?
mmm. Probably. Maybe in the future they have a discussion. Nothing maybe too serious. But not in the AU plans.
What is Wukongs and/or Macaques biggest nightmare(s) I imagine it would be something like seeing MK die or sacrificing himself again or something like that
I think Wukong is more terrified of being alone. So actually I think it would be worse for him that MK doesn't want to see him anymore.
Anonimo ha chiesto: so who is going to be MK‘s hero that he worships ? I don’t know if he still sees Monkey king in that way after finding out that he is basically his dad and hearing the past the fight with Macaque….
Maybe he wont have any hero. Maybe worshipping someone is not such a healthy thing to do. ( I'm not talking in a religious way of course, I meant worshipping a living normal person)
@emmais333 ha chiesto: Love your MK art. One question how many fights from Wukong and Mac does MK overhear on accident
He heard the first one (and the past one through the vision) then Wkong and Mac started to teleport far away enough so he wont be able to hear them discuss.
Anonimo ha chiesto: What if MK catches Mac and Wukong in the act, not visually, but audibly, like hearing it when going to flower feuit mountain, finding the monkeys in a pile, all traumatized. Or is it too soon? Do they get drunk enough to not care? Do they even drink?
in the....act? (sorry I don't understand stuff if it's not explicited said, like I can't understand double meanings if that was what you meant)
Anonimo ha chiesto: I LOVE YOUR STORY, REALLY!!!! I reread a lot. So lovely. And the Baby MK, I just want to hug so badly 🥺 ( I think Macaque become Protecting mode and he won't let me do it. ) You draw Baby MK so so so cute. My heart can't handle it.❤️ Maybe it's a terrifying idea but I would like know your thoughts. I think that Macaque sleeps very quietly, like a man in a coffin. + Macaque fell into a very deep DEEP sleep. (maybe because he was tired from fighting demons to protect Baby MK or get injured or something?) = How do you think Sun Wokung will react?
o my god NO DON'T GIVE HIM AN HEARTH ATTACK (heloses one of their immortalities for having the most horrrendous of jumpscares)
@raspberrymixin ha chiesto: AHHH I LOVE YOU SHADOW PEACH BIO AU OMG ITS TO FREAKEN CUTEEEE AAHH I just melt into a puddle! Love you art and make sure to take breaks- anyway- I find it cute how redson interacts with MK I can just imagine him giving him stuff and little gifts and Mk just confused on why but takes it anyway because of friendship and maybe a sign he's trusting more- but MK is just oblivious to the courting- And maybe redson would ask Wukong, Macaque, Tang or pigsy to allow it maybe? And I also love the slow burn! It's just cute on how Macaque and Wukong make each other blush! Awww it's just to cute! I hope you're doing amazing and have a good night/day
Oh man MK would not be able to read a single clue and just think it's a symbol of friendship or wathever. O my god he really did take from his parents (all of them)
fayeangel25 ha chiesto: YOUUU UFUFFHH WHEN I GET YOUUUUU anyways, I wanna see wukong asking macaque about the story of him and mac ( after mamacaque storytelled his lil baby mk ) , cuz i wanna see more flustered macaque!!! Also, 👏 EATING 👏 THIS 👏 AU 👏 UP!!
Hehe he would be a little shy about it. But Macaque is a theater kid so for a bigger audience I guess he would do it.
Anonimo ha chiesto: I feel like I’m new here. What is Court napping?
Consensual Kidnapping with the intend of flirting with another demon.
Anonimo ha chiesto: How many people want to court MK now that he is a real stone monkey AND the son of Wukong and Macaque ?
mmm. Only people close to MK knows that he's the bio kid of shadowpeach. So for now only Red Son
Anonimo ha chiesto: I bet PIF would try to wait for MK to lose the good guy ‘phase’ since she went through that before lmao (forget being good, convert to villainy in the name of love)
Awwww she would!!! But MK is just too good hearted to hurt a fly. (yeah I know he technically has a kill count still-)
Anonimo ha chiesto: MK would obviously call Pigsy "Papa" so what would MK call Tang and Sandy?
I think he would actually call Pigsy "dad" since it's what he calls him that in the show. Maybe it's Tang that gets to be called Papa. I think Sandy is more like an uncle.
@mage-of-words ha chiesto: When will Wukong purpose to Macaque?
WOW- HOLD ON THERE. LET HIM TAKE HIM TO DINNER FIRST.
Anonimo ha chiesto: Omg I wonder if Macaque and Monkey King ever saw MK get really hurt during a battle with a new demon. RIP the Demon bc two feral Monkeys are after them now bc they hurt their kid.
Them to said demon: So you have choosen.... death.
Anonimo ha chiesto: Hear me out, Mac and Wukong in a get along shirt for a day (lost a bet to MK and he planned this too) LOVE YOUR ART TOO ITS SO SCRUMDIDDLYUMPTIOUCIOUS
this is an old ask, sorry for taking so long to answer. But I would say that at this point of the story Wukong would probably be at cloud 9 being squished to super soft macaque all day. Macaque would be like a kitten undecided on wheter he loves or hate the situation (doesn't really likes un-warned physical touch.
Anonimo ha chiesto: Hoi there, I found you again! (Following you on Insta as well because your art is awesome ^^)
Reading your LMK ShadowPeaches comics and they are fun. And now my brain can't help but make up scenarios, one like this one. Oh my, MK is a cute little baby! (^///^) Oh my, MK is a little baby!! ('O_O) Welp, Pigsy is going to kill someone unless Wukong gives baby MK into his arms to calm down and be busy being a dad than a raging Hulk. (:P) Also, I imagine MK accidentally shrinking himself, (Wukong decided to play hide and seek with it only to later on regret it). Wukong would freaking out about it, and Macaque then shook him violently while yelling into his face for losing MK. Then out of Nowhere, Nezha shows up at the door frame and be like 'Um, hey guys. Is this yours?' Points at his nose where tiny baby bean MK was, clinging onto Nezha's nose while giggling.
askjajvbks that's a lovely scene! Unfortunately Nehza can't know yet about MK, but maybe he will...
@lara-legomonkiekid 💜:Hey! I'm here to ask permission!Can I make an art Drawing of your Bio parents AU Meeting One of my AU's?Please?(Mostly Suposed to be Meeting One of my OC's!) (Love Your Art and Comics!!!!)(◕ᴗ◕✿)(◍•ᴗ•◍)
Yeah sure! just be sure to tag me and link the masterpost of the AU
Anonimo ha chiesto: I find it funny how your shadowpeach bio au came from a joke and now.....wow Your art is amazing
My friend even tried to warn me. BUT I DIDN'T LISTEN
Anonimo ha chiesto: I need Freenoodles talking late at night about MK's new situation Will they be worried? Happy? I don't think Pigsy will take it very well that just when he and MK accepted each other as Father and Son, he is (partly) taken away by his biological dads.
Pigsy was mostly worried that Wukong or Macaque would hurt in any way MK. Both ahim and Tang after they saw how much the 2 care about MK calmed down, still they just hope they don't mess up things.
Anonimo ha chiesto: parenting it not just about having fun with your children, but also making sure there are boundaries even if the child isn’t happy about it. So, how would it go if Macaque and Wukong would try to ground MK 😂
MK is a little old for being grounded I think but if they were to do it maybe with something like no training for a week or smt. He's still an adult (i know we sometimes forget)
Anonimo ha chiesto: MK trying to prank his parents and wake them up with a loud instrument or sound. MK forgetting he has sensitive hearing 💀
reverso uno card
Anonimo ha chiesto: Would wukong or MK help macaque in his drawings if he asked 🙃 or if they tried to help him improve
Awww they would!!! Actually what if this creative side of him was something he kind of inherted from Wukong?
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Best of 2024 Good Omens Fanfiction
Welcome to my list of the best Good Omens fanfiction I’ve read in 2024! These are my favorites of all the novels, short stories, and series I’ve read this year, and they’re the ones I have or am most likely to read more than once. There’s so much amazing talent in the Good Omens fandom, and I will never be able to read every great story, but I’m happy to have found these fantastic works. (FYI, I added up the word counts of all the stories on this list, and it’s over three million!)
First of all, if you haven’t read the stories on my 2023 Best Of list, be sure to check out the amazing works there. There are a lot of older classics, like Or Be Nice, Slow Show, and Pray For Us, Icarus and some stories written after season two released, like Factory Setting and Married At First Sight.
Secondly, here is the entire list of every recommendation I’ve made in 2024. There are far more great stories than can fit in a single year-end list. I’ll be unpinning that list and pinning up a new one next year.
Last year, I was able to split my list up more evenly into canon adjacent/compliant and human AU. This year, I read a wider variety of stories, many of them quite long, and more series. I’m splitting the list into three categories: canon, human AU, and non-human AU. There's no order or ranking to the list; they were mostly just added as I read them.
There are also no WIPs here; all of the stories are complete. The series are also complete at the time of this list or are a series of standalone shorts that don't need to be read in order. My preferences lean toward funnier, lighter stories and are often heavy on plot. If you’re looking for dark stories with a lot of angst, you won’t find as many here as other blogs might recommend. It’s not that some of these don’t have dark, sad moments or moments of angst, but Aziraphale and Crowley must have a happy ending, and I prefer stories that don’t make me cry or cause a lot of stress.
If you like these stories, don’t forget to leave kudos and comments for the authors!
If you hit that "Keep reading" button, strap in! This is a very, very long post.
Canon
They’re still angel and demon. I’m counting Reverse Omens in this category.
The Seventh Prince of Hell (56K; Rated M) by @evilasiangenius
Reverse Omens. This is actually part of a series, but I’ve only read the first book, so I’m not listing it as a series. Aziraphale is the Seventh Prince of Hell. His animal aspect is the octopus. Crowley is an ordinary angel. Both are assigned to Earth. They have adventures!
Genesis 3:(-7)-5.5 -7 And they assembled all the Lords, the Princes of Hell into a congregation together sometime after the seventh day, but not on a day of rest because even the Dark Council has a day off. -6 When it came to pass that all grew weary of the powerful pointing presentations, Lord Beelzebub spake with a loud voice, saying unto them, One of uzz brotherzz muzzt go to Earth as Hell’s Represzentative and thwart the doings of Heaven; there izz no choice now that the Almighty has created humanzz. Who amongzt uzz shall take up the project? It comezz with a great deal of extra paperwork, much travel, and no overtime pay. And we shall not reimbursze anything and there shall be no per diem. [...] -3 And of the seven Princes of Hell, three stepped forward, and only three; not two nor five, which are the other prime numbers near three and definitely not one, which is not a prime at all but the unit. The first was the Second Prince, who is called Asmodeus and is a demon of lust. The second was the Seventh Prince, who is called Aziraphale and is a demon of collecting stuff. And the third was the Fourth Prince, who is not worth talking about because they only appear in this one scene and for no other reason than to have three characters. I think that Prince is the demon of executive dysfunction or erectile dysfunction or something like that. Maybe both.
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Nice And Ominous: a reluctant eschatology of the Second Attempt (series) (117K; Rated T/E) by @e-rated-beardo
A three-part, post-s2 series with gorgeous art by the author. Part I is Crowley’s POV as he deals with the loss of his angel. Part II is from Aziraphale’s POV as he tries to stop the Second Coming and deal with the loss of his demon. Part III is the thrilling finale (and the happy ending). Expect a lot of angst but great characters and plot.
It was a shit day. All the days had been shit, and there had been rather a shitload of them so far. Tucked away in a disused corner of a car park in a retail park in Croydon, a lanky man cracked his eyes open and scowled out the side window of his car. There were raindrops hitting the glass and clouds massing towards the eastern horizon suggested a storm was on its way. He had slept uncomfortably across the front seats for a good amount of time (it didn’t much matter what exact amount), and despite the car being a vintage and exceptionally attractive specimen, nobody had paid it much mind—and the few people who had had the idea to come over and have a look at the ostensibly abandoned vehicle had all suddenly realised how much they actually needed to go buy a sofa or something at that Ikea over there, right about now, in fact. Untangling his various limbs, the man in the car—who wasn’t exactly a man, as such, but close enough for government work—reluctantly sat up, his boot brushing against one of the empty bottles on the floor. He had neglected to sober up before going to sleep.
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Too Hot for Heavenly Handling (2.4K; Rated E) by @hollybennett123
Crowley says yes to returning to Heaven. The two enjoy three fornication-fueled weeks before they’re hauled before the Metatron and the other archangels for a disciplinary hearing. Rating-aside, there’s not any actual sex in this story. It’s implicit; not explicit.
I’ve read this story more times than I can count (ok, it’s seven). I nearly choked the first time I read it, because I was laughing so hard. Every sentence is a gem. The timing of the jokes is impeccable. There’s not a single bad line in this entire piece.
“No angel shall pretend to be of a lower status than their actual ranking,” Aziraphale reads aloud. “What does that have to do with — ohhh,” he says, wide-eyed, remembering their ongoing little roleplay. Crowley, an angel of the lowest ranking in their little game, seeking favour from an Archangel; offering to service him in secret so he might earn a series of Heavenly promotions. It had been jolly good fun, actually. “Misuse of Heavenly furniture,” the Metatron continues. “One count. Again, the actual number is unknown. Quite frankly, no one here is willing to research it further to gather any more evidence than the minimum required to bring you before this Council.” Looking back, Aziraphale’s desk has seen quite a bit of action in recent weeks. And the chair. The walls, too, if they count.
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Aziraphale’s Diaries (series) (11K; Rated T) by @fellshish
A series of standalone fics written as Aziraphale’s diary entries. They don’t need to be read in any order. All of them are fantastic, but I probably laughed the hardest at “Adventures of a mystery shopper in the bookshop.” Aziraphale decides Crowley must be bored after the Nomageddon and in need of work and decides to “let” him take care of his bookshop while he’s away, but then he worries the demon might sell some of his books.
29 August 2018 I’ve informed Crowley I’ll be going away for about three weeks, to perform an exciting and complicated blessing abroad. In reality, I’ve booked the Ritz for myself, where I’ll be forced to act human and eat breakfasts, lunches and dinners. Anything to keep a close eye on Crowley! 30th August 2018 It’s my first day away. I decided to go by the bookshop in an “old and confused man disguise” so I could look through the window. I was just in time (a three hour window between lunch and afternoon tea at the Ritz) to see him read the letter I’d posted a few days ago so it would arrive just as I’d left. It was cleverly addressed “To the owner or the current guardian of this bookshop”. I used all my knowledge of humans, gathered via the cleverest of ways (a lot of reading), to write it.
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A Special Place In Hell (50K; Rated T) by @hotcrosspigeon and @mirach
When Adam shifted reality and caused Satan to disappear, the nearest supernatural entity became the new King of Hell. As it so happened, a certain angel was standing just a little closer than his demon.
Aziraphale, while not Falling, becomes the new ruler of Hell and must navigate Hellish politics, find a role for the love of his life, and maybe bring some proper tea time to the infernal realm. I stumbled upon this story purely by accident one night, and it was a pure joy to read. It’s one of those stories I wish was a series, because I could read so much more in this world.
"Hello, Crowley, my dear fellow. I would like to discuss a certain issue with you. You see, I somehow got into a very peculiar predicament..." Aziraphale sighed in frustration, pacing in his bookshop. "No no no, that sounds like I got my hand stuck in the sweets vending machine again." He cleared his throat. "Hey Crowley, what's up? Better sit down because I have some news to tell you... And by some news I mean... errr..." The angel groaned. "Oh Heavens, there's just no proper way to say this. Ugh, come on, Aziraphale, buck up! You just need to get to the point, that's all. Say the things as they are. No going in circles around the matter. Nice and accurate, right. Just tell him..." He turned at the sound of the bookshop doorbell. "Hello Crowley! Nice weather, isn't it?" "Wha..?" Crowley raised an incredulous eyebrow over the top of his sunglasses, a drop of water running along the edge of his nose. His red hair was plastered to his forehead. He turned to look out the window, jerking a thumb at the onslaught of vicious hail and rain that pelted the glass and plinked against the pane. "Oh, ha ha , very funny. It's bloody bucketing down, angel! I legged it in here before I got clonked on the head with a hailstone the size of my fist." He stopped and frowned at the angel in concern. "Er... you all right? You're looking a bit peaky."
***
Flowers From Hell (42K; Rated T) by @entanglednow
Crowley creates a hybrid demon flower that turns out to be a little more than he intended. This was such a sweet, beautiful story of found family and love, and you’ll absolutely fall in love with Ivy and want to do everything to protect him.
There's a low, quiet rustle from the atrium, where Crowley keeps his finest plants. The beautiful and often terrified rows of them are always so tall and glossy, and fantastically well maintained. Aziraphale regrets that he hadn't taken more of an interest in Crowley's hobbies. It wouldn't have been too difficult, he imagines, to seek out rare specimens to offer the demon. When he's been given so many long sought after volumes, and unpublished manuscripts in turn. Perhaps he could encourage Crowley to open up more, with a few well thought out questions pertaining to his plants, and their various needs. He knows Crowley has been absorbed in a special project recently, he'll make a point to ask about it today. Aziraphale heads into the stretch of greenery, following the tap of feet on tiles, and the quiet swish of foliage. He catches a flash of red hair at the end of the room, behind a messy spray of deep green leaves, then another flash, of what might be the long, pale curve of a shoulder. "Crowley?" The whole room smells damp, thick with fresh soil and crushed plant matter, and it grows stronger the deeper in Aziraphale ventures. He's sure the room wasn't quite so large before, it's clearly been expanded since he visited last, a deep bed of soil is now packed at the back of the room. "Crowley." Aziraphale eases a large spray of damp leaves aside. "I hope I'm not too early, I was -" Crowley is standing by the far wall, carefully touching the valley in the middle of a large leaf with curious, repetitive motions. He's also quite naked. It's - it's unexpected to say the least.
***
Time Marches Forward (129K; Rated M) by @bellisima-writes
While Aziraphale is in Heaven trying to thwart the Second Coming, Crowley is trying to help a frightened 15-year-old Adam learn to deal with his powers. I consider this the definitive S3 (even having written a post-S2 myself), regardless of what the upcoming finale gives us. Every character is wonderfully fleshed out. The plot is intriguing. I read it as fast as humanly possible, barely stopping to do anything else.
Crowley felt the air in the Bentley shift slightly. “What are you doing here?” Crowley jumped in shock, hitting his head on the roof of the Bentley so hard his sunglasses fell off. Adam was suddenly in the passenger seat, studying him cautiously. “Hey! You can’t just come into my car, uninvited,” Crowley hissed, grabbing his glasses and placing them back on his face. He realized he was still slouching, making Adam appear much bigger than he was. He sat up straight and crossed his arms in an attempt to look more intimidating and less drunk. He wondered if it was wise to try and glower at the Antichrist. “He can, actually,” Pepper said from the back seat. Crowley turned and snarled as he noted the three other teenagers in his car. Wensleydale and Brian sat beside her. “He can do anything.” “Yeah well, that may be so but that doesn’t make it right. Just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should,” he looked Adam directly in the eyes as he said this, assuming no one else around him would ever be so blunt. “What are you doing lurking around my house?” Adam asked again plainly. Crowley’s glowering was not working. “Ngk. I didn’t come to see you, if that’s what you're asking. I’m as shocked as you are to find myself here. I was asleep for a few days. The bloody car did it; blame it for the lurking”
***
The Last Angel (162K; Rated E) by @bellisima-writes
Crowley's been Hell's Grand Inquisitor for millennia now. Ever since the Apocalypse, he's managed to carve out a relatively cushy life for himself. Hell won the War, Angels were essentially eradicated and all human souls were Satan's. Everything was fine. Until one day he hears a rumor that the Last Angel in the universe was finally captured. Until Beelzebub is suddenly ordering him to get information from said Angel, information that's critical for Hell's survival. Until the moment he first locks eyes with the last Angel, and everything he's ever known starts to crumble around him.
I can’t come up with a better description than the summary. Much like the author’s previous work, Time Marches Forward, this is plot-heavy, exciting, action-packed, and gorgeous. The characters are detailed and realistic. The plot sings. And you won’t see the surprise until it’s already there.
“What kinds of rumors?” he asked, shifting in his seat to properly face Eric. Words were one thing, but body language was another. As Grand Inquisitor, Crowley learned early on to weigh both when evaluating information shared by a source whose reliability was questionable. Eric was a nice kid, sure. But their reliability would definitely be categorized as questionable . Eric’s mood shifted as they glanced around the corridor. Crowley hadn’t realized how quiet the cells had gotten. The bloody humans were eavesdropping again. He dug deep and pulled up a hiss so loud and laced with demonic power that it rattled every cell door in the entire block. Eric motioned with their hand for Crowley to follow them into a corner and out of earshot of everyone else. As Crowley pulled himself up and started walking he sent searing looks down each row of cells around him. They were all going to have a talk about this later. “What?” he asked when he got close enough to Eric. Still eyeing the cells behind them, Eric leaned in closer and whispered, “Hastur finally found him."
Crowley shook his head. Eric’s shiftiness was starting to annoy him. “Found who?” “The one who killed Ligur. Crowley, Hastur’s finally captured the last Angel.”
***
Kidnapping A Supreme Archangel For Fun And Profit (series) (31K; Rated T) by @waitingtobebroken
Mostly outsider POV. Four short stories told mostly from the points of view of Agiel, the Supreme Archangel’s assistant, and Kric (Eric with a K), the Grand Duke’s assistant as they try to figure out why the Supreme Archangel is so unworried about all the times he’s getting himself kidnapped by the Grand Duke. In the meantime, the two assistants find that maybe they have more in common than they would have expected, being hereditary enemies and all.
Being Lord Beelzebub's demonic assistant had been easier than overseeing the third circle of Hell. Just stay out of the way, don't make eye contact, not that Kric could, having been blessed with a distinct lack of eyes, and do not talk to the Prince of Hell, unless it was a 'Yes, Your Highness' or... No, that was pretty much it. You did not go around saying "No" to Lord Beelzebub. And of course, just as they had finally grown comfortable in their position, had even found the perfect time to ask for an assistant of their own... There had been a change in leadership. And Kric had found themself serving Crowley. The Original Tempter, the Snake of Eden, the Earth Walker. Kric was not impressed. Flash bastard. And suddenly, they were expected to be in the throne room at all times. To answer when addressed. Proper, actual answer. None of that automatic 'Yes, your Highness' they were so used to. The first time His Rottenness had held up two sashes, before the monthly meeting between Heaven and Hell and had asked which one made his scales look more iridescent and Kric had answered in the only way they knew how... Well, let's just say that hadn't gone well. They had been sent to something called Fashion Week. To better their understanding of clothes and colour theory, something they could sense had been invented by a fellow demon. Lord Crowley, most probably, judging by the way His Wickedness had grinned when he had told them that.
*****
Human AU
Fully human characters. No supernatural/magical elements.
Waking Up Slow (88K; Rated E) by @themoonmothwrites
After both being exposed to covid, strangers Crowley and Aziraphale wait out their isolation together (there’s only one bed!) at a cottage by the sea. This is complete cosycore fluff with just a touch of angst (and a happy ending) near the end. This gorgeous story has stuck with me for so long. If you want something that’s just plain pleasurable to read, this is it.
“Lovely view.” The voice was low, with the slightest hint of gravel, and right next to Aziraphale’s ear. He made an undignified noise and spun round in fright. “Where the devil did you-?” he started, high-voiced, before his foot caught on a stone and he lost his balance. The stranger was standing so close that Aziraphale toppled right into him, and the pair of them went down together in a tangle of knees and a solid thunk to the forehead. “Ow,” the man said, squinting up at Aziraphale, gaze unfocused, before his eyes fell closed. “Oh no!” Aziraphale breathed. “Oh dear. What do I-?” He’d left his blasted phone at the cottage, now of all times when he actually needed it! With an unconscious man lying before him! And it was all Aziraphale’s doing! “I can-- I can-- I know what to do!” he told himself, attempting belatedly not to panic. The best thing to do was not to think too hard. Tipping up the stranger’s chin, Aziraphale pinched his nose and lowered his face until his mouth closed over the other man’s.
***
The Prince’s Consort (142K; Rated E) by @ineffable-toreshi
Aziraphale is the crown prince of a fictional nation. Crowley is a Lily, trained in one of Lucien’s brothels and kept a virgin for the eventual sale to a wealthy master. Against the brothel owner’s wishes, Crowley is purchased by the prince’s adviser, Gabriel, as a companion for Prince Aziraphale. Aziraphale didn’t want a purchased mate, however, and decides to court his new consort the old-fashioned way.
The description makes this sound like a darker story than it is; it’s actually a really sweet story with only one bad guy (and it’s not Gabriel).
I wrote a much longer review here if you’d like more details.
“I...I was just wondering, my Lord,” Anthony said, nervously nibbling on his lip and twisting his fingers in his lap. “Why did you choose me ?” Gabriel cocked his head to the side. He leaned back, reclining with his arms thrown up over the edges of the bench, and seemed to think about the question. By the time he finally opened his mouth to answer, Anthony was practically vibrating with curiosity. “There were a few factors,” he explained thoughtfully. “I’ll admit that your appearance was the first and foremost. I prefer women, myself, but I know beauty in a man when I see it. And I’ve seen the types who’ve caught the prince’s eye over the years. I’m quite confident that he will find you more than pleasing, from an aesthetic standpoint.”
***
Keep Digging (7K; Rated T) by Appleseeds
After panicking and losing his nerve trying to ask out Aziraphale, the co-worker Crowley has an enormous crush on, he tells a little white lie that ends up completely spiralling out of control since he can't seem to stop digging himself into a deeper and deeper hole. Now he's obtained plans to help him break into a school, inadvertently funded the purchase of explosives, and, knowing his luck, the fake blood will end up permanently staining the tiles. Who knows though, maybe in the end, it'll all turn out to be worth it.
Another one of those stories that are so funny tears stream down my face every time. Even going back through it to find an excerpt had me choking down laughter.
“I actually used to be a music tutor. That was one of the little jokes I liked to tell.” Aziraphale giggled again. Nhhhhh. “Wish you could tutor me…” Crowley muttered under his breath. “Oh! Are you wanting to learn to play a musical instrument?” Aziraphale asked brightly. Crowley’s eyes widened. He wasn’t supposed to hear that. Of course, he wouldn’t have heard it if Crowley had just kept his big mouth shut. “Um. Yeah.” “Wonderful! Which one?” FUCK. How the hell was Crowley supposed to answer that? Whatever he said, he might end up having to get one of said instrument, and he didn’t know much, but he knew musical instruments could be incredibly expensive. There must be something that would be cheap enough to procure if needs be, right? And with that thought, Crowley responded. “The triangle.” Oh Jesus Christ.
***
Temple of the Muses (241K; Rated E) by @ajconstantine
It’s the start of the Season in 1841 Victorian England. Mr Anthony Crowley has left a life of working at a luxurious high end bordello in Paris behind him and is now a courtesan intent on climbing the social ladder in London to increase his status and social connections. After unexpectedly inheriting the title of the Earl of Eastgate, Aziraphale finds himself trying to navigate the complicated world of the aristocracy. Duke Gabriel purchases a month-long contract with Mr Crowley for Lord Fell as a surprise gift to Aziraphale’s astonishment and dismay. He declines to take full advantage of Crowley’s charms but agrees to an arrangement of pretending to be Crowley’s paramour in exchange for lessons on the etiquette and expectations of Society. It’s a practical arrangement, nothing more. Certainly no feelings will be involved...
One of the best, most well-researched stories I’ve read. The historical elements are fascinating, and the world-building is top notch. Set in an alternate 1841 where there’s no stigma on same sex relationships, but same sex marriage is still not allowed. The story alternates between the present time, with Aziraphale and Crowley navigating their growing relationship, and Crowley’s time being trained at one of the most elite bordellos of Paris.
Crowley has a lot of autonomy in this story. He actively chose to become a sex worker. Once he leaves the bordello and becomes a courtesan, he can refuse to sign with a client. And while there are consequences for breaking a contract, a courtesan can walk away from a troublesome client.
“Exactly what position do you think I was hired for?” Crowley interrupted, pulling the shoulder of his robe back up. The Earl looked at him as if he’d asked a ridiculous question. “Valet, of course.” Crowley barked out a disbelieving laugh. “Duke Haven didn’t tell you about me?” The Earl pursed his lips, tilting his head in puzzlement. “Not you precisely. I was at his house last week, and he chastised me when I mentioned that I didn’t have a valet, insisting I needed one even though…” His eyes widened. “Oh no. What… what did you think you were being hired for?” Struck by the absurdity of it all, Crowley fought the strong urge to laugh outright. Instead, he gave the Earl a roguish grin and bowed with a flourish. “Mr Anthony Crowley, at your service, sir. Duke Haven procured a contract for me to be your... courtesan.” Lord Fell's mouth dropped open as he gaped at him in apparent shock. “You— I—” He floundered, at a loss for words as he looked away from Crowley. His eyes landed on the bed. To Crowley’s growing amusement, the Early actually blushed, red staining his cheeks as he swiftly averted his gaze.
***
#RAINBOWROAD (series) (407K; Rated T/E) by @nieded
If you haven’t heard of this one yet, you’re one of today’s lucky 10,000. This is one of the best, most well-written human AUs that anyone has produced for Good Omens (or really, of any romance). It’s a three-book, three-short series set in the world of Formula 1 racing. You heard that right. You don’t need to know anything about F1 racing. You don’t even need to like F1 racing. You just need to want to read one of the best romances ever written to enjoy this series.
Ezira Phale is a rookie F1 driver. AJ Crowley is an F1 veteran and an idol of the 25-year-old racer. Everything changes when Ezira meets and falls in love with Crowley, and the older driver (by about 10 years; there’s not a massive age difference here) seems to return his feelings. I wrote a very long review of the series here, so I won’t go into a ton of detail again except to say, if you love human AU, this should be on your list. The author adds notes at the end of the chapters explaining some of the more technical aspects of the sport, or talking about some of the real racers, and it’s fascinating.
Ezira makes his escape from the after-party after stealing a handful of fig tartlets from the hors d’oeuvres table. He ducks out the service exit before looping back to the front of the hotel. God, he wants to sleep off his tipsiness. It’s significantly cooler at night, and he wraps his arms around his shoulders before slipping inside, making a dash for the elevator. Punching his floor number, he leans against the wall and closes his eyes, waiting to be taken to his floor. Then the elevator jerks as someone jabs their hand between the sliding doors, forcing it back open. Ezira lifts his head and glares at the newcomer before his eyes widen, flushing when he recognizes the red hair and black Renault polo. AJ Crowley throws himself into the opposite corner of the elevator and pulls the brim of his hat down. He turns to look at Ezira from under his cap. "Tough luck out there today, huh?" he asks. Ezira frowns and blinks. And because he’s a little drunk and high on adrenaline, he says, "Didn’t you place seventh? I thought that was fucking brilliant." This earns him a snort, and then a bit of stifled laughter. "You can’t say fuck." "You say fuck in almost every interview you do." Not that Ezira has watched every single post-debrief involving AJ Crowley. This makes Crowley laugh harder, and he wipes at his eyes. "You just look like you should be in a painting or something. You’re like a Hummel." Flabbergasted, Ezira stares. His cheeks grow hot when he realizes AJ Crowley is taking the piss. "I don’t even know what that means." Crowley wipes his eye with the back of his hand and then presses his lips together in a feeble attempt to hold back another fit of laughter. "I’m sorry. I’m just very, very drunk, and was not expecting you to say ‘fuck.’ You look like those cherubs from Italy."
***
Lunacy (57K; Rated E) by @snae-b
@snae-b writes some of the best sci-fi GO stories you’ll ever read. This is hardly the only great story of theirs I’ve recommended; it just happens to be my personal favorite. Crowley is the crew chief of a mining operation on one of Pluto’s tiny moons. Aziraphale is a geologist there to study the structural integrity of the moon. But something seems to be alive, something that shouldn’t be there. This is pure psychological horror, the kind of story where you’re never quite sure what’s real and what’s a hallucination. You’ll find definitely NSFW artwork throughout, so take note not to read it around people you wouldn’t want seeing porn on your screen.
Crowley zones out as they continue their conversation. Things had been weird in the mine today. For the past month really. Tech malfunctioning. Batteries draining when they should have been able to hold a charge for days. Half the lights were on the fritz. As if it weren't dark enough in there already. He'd had to trek nearly a mile into Sheol with only the lights on his helmet to repair them. And his crew had their hands full with extraction, so he’d had to do it alone. The darkness really starts to play tricks on you in there. He spent as much time looking over his shoulder as he did working on the lights. Kept thinking that he was seeing something. Something hiding in the shadows. Something that lived in his peripheral vision. As he tugs a beanie on over his head there’s a light rapping on the wall and everyone glances up to the figure in the doorway. “Excuse me, Mr. Crowley. If you have time in your schedule, I really need to discuss the most recent surface scans with you. Could you come by my quarters before dinner?” Crowley sighs as he snaps on his mag boots. “Yeah. Sure thing doc. I’ll be by in thirty.” The scientist only nods before he disappears down the hall. Dr. Aziraphale Fell. He doesn’t wear the standard issue jumpsuits. He wears thick sweaters and wool trousers that look ridiculous with his mag boots. And when he isn’t wearing them, he can hardly get around. Bumps into everything and everyone. He’s never been off planet before and it shows.
***
Miracles on Ice (131K; Rated E) by @henriettarhippo
It’s the “Blades of Glory” AU you never knew you wanted. Crowley and Aziraphale are men’s figure skaters who get banned from the sport after a fight on the podium. Years later, Aziraphale’s coach, Gabriel, suggests the two of them team up to compete in the Olympic’s pairs event. Only problem is, the two skaters hate each other.
This is very much an enemies-to-lovers story, and Gabriel as their coach and sponsor is the perfect combination of asshole and good guy. He genuinely does care for his two skaters, and he’s generous with his money, but he also has that rich guy attitude of being used to getting what he wants, and he’s not afraid to tell them to stop being dumbasses either.
“Hey angel, was that your routine? Because it looked to me like a lot of swanning about on the ice with a few pirouettes thrown in.” The mocking drawl came from the figure making his way towards Aziraphale on a pair of sharp blades. Clad in skintight black velvet trousers and a black turtleneck adorned with glittering red crystals—to match the striking red curls that stopped at his shoulders—Aziraphale’s skating rival Crowley beamed down at him with a malicious grin. “Also, you’re a bit late. They handed out the women’s medals earlier today.” He pulled down the dark shades he always wore to give Aziraphale a wink. Aziraphale bristled and sat up straighter. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. That was textbook precision, and I think you’ll find it was the same scores I beat you with last year in Oslo.” “The hotel had a free bar I don’t even remember Oslo,” Crowley said dismissively as he approached the entrance to the rink. He turned back and gave Aziraphale a grin. “But I do remember Boston, and that victory was almost as sweet as the look on your face when you botched that triple loop.” Crowley let out a laugh at the scandalised look Aziraphale gave him. The loudspeakers started up with the first booming notes of a rock song and Crowley hopped up onto the ice and skated away from him before Aziraphale had the chance to reply.
***
Friends Don't (33K; Rated E) by @missunderstoodlyrics
Human AU. Another fantastic enemies-to-lovers by MissUnderstoodLyrics. This is the newest story on this list.
Aziraphale and Crowley are rival advice columnists whose companies are merged. The CEO, Gabriel, tells them they now have to do a joint video podcast together. The snark and bickerflirting are top notch, and this story kept a smile on my face. They have to keep their romance a secret, because the whole schtick of their podcast is their very public rivalry, but it gets harder and harder the closer they become.
Aziraphale attempted to drown his mirth in his wine glass, which was precisely when Crowley decided to position his mouth millimetres from the angel’s ear. “Blair. Have you met him? Worst. Comb-over. Since. Thatcher,” he whispered and then found himself helpfully patting Aziraphale's back as the man choked and spluttered, his cherubic face turning a delightful shade of pink. “Absolute fiend,” Aziraphale managed once he’d caught his breath, but the corners of his mouth were twitching traitorously. Crowley clocked Michaela out of the corner of his eye; she was leaning forward to shush them. Aziraphale escaped her wrath by standing and marching to the stage, his back straight and shoulders squared. He planted himself solidly in front of the microphone and proceeded to destroy what was left of Crowley’s sanity. “I once met a man-shaped snake,” he stated, his gaze firmly locked on Crowley. “Whose snark was taxing to take With swagger and pose He turned up his nose But his wisdom was rather half-baked.”
*****
Non-Human AU
One or both of them are non-human, or have some sort of supernatural abilities (like magic) but aren’t angel or demon. I’m including omegaverse in this category.
Mark of the Serpent (150K; Rated E) by @naromoreau and @summerofspock
Prince Aziraphale is about to be crowned King of Angelhaven when he's taken captive by pirates. When he's sold as a pleasure slave to King Crowley, ruler of the nation readying for war with his, he is forced to keep his identity a secret as he tries to find a way home and keep peace. But not everything at King Crowley's court is as it seems and Aziraphale will have to face machinations of a Royal Court that are far more complex than he had thought. A Captive Prince AU with an omegaverse twist.
The first omegaverse story I genuinely liked, even though Crowley is pretty awful toward Aziraphale at first. Since then I’ve come to enjoy more of them, but this is the one that got me into the genre. This is another one I’ve written a much longer review about here including an explanation for the “extremely dubious consent” tag.
"What about this one?" the omega king asked, eyes fixed on his face, a strange curl to his mouth. "He's an Angel," Hastur sneered. "Pretty, isn't he? We were trying to pick a variety for your majesty to choose from since you didn’t deign to accompany us, but we didn’t find out his origin until after we brought him. He probably doesn't even speak the language." The words manifested in Aziraphale’s mind, and he immediately saw the genius in them. If he didn't speak the language, he could hardly be appealing as a consort to the king. He would be dismissed, sent back to Tracy's, and given time to heal before making his escape. "An Angel?" the king repeated, something passing over his face that Aziraphale didn't like. "What's your name?" "I’m sorry," Aziraphale stammered in Angelic, sticking to his hastily made plan. "I don’t...I don’t know what you're saying." King Crowley smiled and said, in perfect Angelic, "I asked what your name was." "Oh, um, I- you can call me whatever you wish," Aziraphale said, not wanting to risk even a part of his name. The king laughed. "I'm choosing the Angel. Send him to my quarters." "But your majesty-" The omega king turned on Ligur. "You wanted me to choose a pleasure beta and I did. It's done. Were there any other highly important council matters or can I get back to my day?"
***
Saltwater on Skin (186K; Rated E) by @candyqueenblog
Another one with a longer review here. Ezra Fell is an award-winning novelist celebrating the millionth sale of his newest books with his friends and baby brother, Gabriel, on a rented yacht. He falls overboard and washes ashore on an uncharted island, and while awaiting rescue, he gets the strange feeling he’s not alone.
This is a low angst love story between the human and the naga who rescues him, and you’ll fall in love with the island and Crowley’s four sisters. Gabriel is a peach here, much younger than Ezra and very much the caring baby brother.
And if you’d prefer an Ineffable Wives version of the story, you can find that here. I haven’t read it, but I assume it’s equally good.
Ezra couldn’t stifle the flood of tears as he threw his arms over his head with a scream. Then a pair of rough, but blessedly human hands, covered his wrists. “You… scared?” The stranger’s voice was gravelly, most likely from disuse, but to Ezra it sounded more beautiful than all the angelic choirs. He sobbed in relief. “Oh thank heavens! I thought for sure I was going to-” His words sputtered and died when he opened his eyes to look at his rescuer. It was a man… ...from the waist up. The man’s bare torso was thin, but well defined with long arms lean with muscle. His face was all angles framed by a shock of red hair that curled down his back. His eyes were captivating. They were human enough, save for the iris being the color of spun gold and sliced right down the middle by a slit-shaped pupil. That was about where the human similarities ended. From the waist down the man’s skin melded into a massive snake tail that was wider than Ezra’s entire body and covered in black scales with a red underbelly that matched his hair.
***
FAETED (series) (251K; Rated G/T) by @ineffably-good
The only story in this category that’s not rated E. A three-book, one-short series where Ezra, an English teacher at a public school accidentally ends up in the Fae realms and in the hands of the Unseelie king, Crowley. The world-building is fantastic, and the books use some of the side characters so well, especially Hastur and Ligur, two of Crowley’s most trusted advisers. Crowley is good to Ezra, but he’s spent a thousand years ruling over the chaotic and dangerous unseelie fae, and he doesn’t always know how to handle being in love with a human. And Ezra doesn’t understand the difficult and often prickly politics of the fae, so the two have a lot of misunderstandings to work through. It leads to several fights, but they are usually resolved within the chapter.
The stories are heavy on plot, mostly around the world of the fae, which is one of the things I love most about this series. I could easily read dozens of books set in this world.
Lord Crowley watched as Ezra emerged from the coach, curious to see how this strange mortal would react to his first sight of the Dark Court. Would he blanch in terror? Would he be curious? He didn’t know or understand the creature across from him, but he knew one thing— his reactions, to date, were not what the Prince expected. This was oddly refreshing. It had been so, so long since anyone had managed to surprise him. He watched as Ezra emerged, his fluffy golden hair sticking out in all directions above the dark gray travel cloak he’d donned. He smiled faintly and with studious politeness at the horrifying gremlin who helped him down the steps, brushed the nonexistent dust off himself, and took in his surroundings. Crowley was gratified to see his eyes widen as he looked around. They were standing in the center of an immense cavern, almost as if a mountain had been hollowed out inside by an immense blast. The rock walls climbed up above them and came together at an unmeasurable distance overhead and were dotted everywhere one looked with cavernous openings, some of which flickered with the light from a fire further inside. Creatures here and there, too murky to make out fully, hovered near the openings of some of them, peering down at the return of their Prince with eyes he could not read. Further ahead, the floor cracked into a massive chasm which ranged across the rest of the cavern and was crossed here and there by rickety-looking bridges. It was lit from below by the light of flames and the scent of sulfur. Stalagmites rose from the floor at irregular intervals, some of them paired with stalactites dropping from the ceiling like large, rocky icicles. Their surfaces glittered here and there with what looked like mica or gems. Crowley watched as Ezra took all of this in at a glance. “Thoughts?” said Lord Crowley, sidling up to him. Ezra turned astonished eyes the color of blue sky to him. “It’s beautiful! I’ve never seen anything like this.” Crowley searched his face for mockery or insincerity but found only earnestness. The Prince felt a tingle of pleasure at this, at least for a moment, until he ruthlessly slammed that feeling down inside himself and returned to his usual sardonic detachment. He hadn’t brought the human here to be his friend.
***
If He’s Your Cleric, Why Is He Putting Me In His Bag of Holding? (300K; Rated E) by @noodlefrog-omens
I read this twice in a row. Literally. I stopped it and almost immediately started it again. I played D&D 3.5 for many years, and I absolutely loved seeing a D&D adventure played out in the GO universe. Aziraphale is the cleric of an adventuring party that stupidly decides to abandon him in the dungeon (you don’t abandon your healer!). Crowley is a very hungry mimic who ends up nearly dying in Aziraphale’s bag of holding before the cleric rescues him. (Look, if you’re going to look like a fancy book, don’t be surprised when the man tries to steal you).
Aziraphale still needs to find his adventuring party again, and the mimic decides to travel along with him. Along the way they find kobolds, a doppelganger, traps, and the obligate dungeon maze, all the while getting to know each other. Aziraphale recognizes his feelings toward the mimic fairly early on, but it takes Crowley longer to even understand what his feelings even mean.
The porn doesn’t start until chapter 33 (of 40), and only covers maybe three of the remaining eight chapters. You can read the entire adventure and stop once they leave the dungeon if you don’t want any monsterfuckery, or you could skim past the smut to the ending. I don’t know if the author has any plans for sequels, but if he does, I’ll be right there ready.
In that moment, Crowley knew that he had found the right bait to lure this human right to his doom. He waited as patiently as he could while nearly vibrating himself into a puddle, watching as Aziraphale puttered around the room cooing over all the books and scrolls in the room as though they were living creatures. “Just you wait,” Crowley thought to himself, inordinately pleased to have figured out what made this stubborn human tick. “One of them will be.” “There must be centuries’ worth of knowledge collected in just this one chamber,” Aziraphale said in a reverent whisper. Finally, finally he started touching things in this dungeon. He even took his heavy leather gloves off, tucking them into his belt before running a fingertip along the spines of the books chained to the shelves. Crowley watched him take one right off the shelf and thumb through a few of the pages. “We must have walked right by this room. I don’t know why Sandalphon told me there wasn’t anything behind this door. He must not have looked closely enough.” Aziraphale turned his back to the shelves to glance back at the door, and Crowley took his chance to crawl up the side of the bookshelf and arrange himself in front of the chained tomes in pride of place. It wasn’t difficult to change himself into the shape of a book, but this was always about the details. It was an art form. Which books, exactly, had Aziraphale been drawn to? Old ones with leather covers, mostly. Ones with bits of fiddly decoration on the spine. Ones with a bit of mystery. Aziraphale was a cleric, so he was probably interested in talking to the Gods and shite like that, or at least understanding them. That was an angle Crowley could work with. He gave his skin a supple leather texture, inky black and vaguely shimmery in a way he knew would catch the flickering light being thrown out by that sword. Gold edging and lettering crept across his cover and spine, promising divine secrets and cosmic mysteries to anyone who would just reach out and touch. He couldn’t see himself, but Crowley knew that he was a very sexy book right now. Aziraphale would have to be mad not to notice him.
***
Crowley And The Chocolate Factory (55K; Rated E) by @entanglednow
Crowley has to step up for his nephew Adam when he wins a ticket to tour the famous chocolate factories, run by the reclusive and deeply strange Zira Zonka. It doesn't take Crowley long to decide that he wants nothing to do with the man, who's clearly hiding dark and mysterious secrets.
Do you like your Crowley grumpy and cynical? Do you like your Aziraphale weird? Did you think the one thing missing from Charlie and The Chocolate Factory was sex between Wonka and one of the parents in a vintage Bentley? Then this is the story for you!
Crowley doesn’t know what to make of the definitely strange Zira Zonka, but he finds himself drawn to the man nonetheless. The story is set in modern times, but if you know the original (at least the movie version; I can’t speak for the books), you have a general idea of what’s going to happen to the children.
Zonka releases the arms of his partners for long enough to jerk his cane towards the sky, which erupts in a shower of flower petals and candy - a large proportion of which fall on the immediately excited crowd. Crowley's fairly certain he gets hit on the head by a soft fudge. God, this is humiliating. Zonka dances right and then left while the audience cheers in appreciation. He does another circle, separates from the row to do some unimpressive spins while trying - and failing - to find a good rhyme for liquorice. "My candy emporium has so much in store. Just step right up and walk through the door!" Zonka's gold and white cane snaps up into the air again, this time leaving a burst of light and his name written across the sky in sparkling gold calligraphy. It seems to be a dramatic ending, Crowley certainly hopes it's a dramatic ending. "Half of those lines were a stretch," he complains, but quietly and mostly to himself, because the audience seems to have found the whole thing captivating, Adam included. "And there's only five kids, not six, he can't even count." The Erik's all unlink arms, to thunderous applause from the crowd behind him, and Zonka gives the widest grin Crowley has ever seen. His hands flung on his hips, like the world's most enthusiastic children's entertainer. Crowley half expects him to ask who wants to see a magic trick. "How has this man possibly managed to stay out of the limelight for twenty years?" he wonders. "Or twenty minutes."
***
Villainous (217K; Rated E) by @ineffablepenguin
Once Upon A Time… There was a red-haired sorcerer who lived alone in a high tower, and a blond prince who lived in a palace full of people. And they were both of them desperately lonely. The Kingdoms of Empyrion and the Sorcerers of Apollyon have hated each other for hundreds of years, ever since the Great War. They do not interact, other than to occasionally try to kill one another. And they certainly do not make friends. Crow is an exhausted sorcerer who just wants everyone to leave him the hell alone: for the Sorcerer’s Council to stop harassing him to live up to his potential, and for wannabe Empyrion Heroes to stop attacking his tower to try and kill him. Until one day when he meets Prince Azra of the High Fells, who doesn’t behave anything like he’s supposed to…
This is one of those stories a lot of people recommend for good reason. It’s a fantastic fairy tale full of love and romance between two people who seem destined for one another. The writing is gorgeous, the world-building is fantastic, and there’s really great artwork scattered throughout. Some of the artwork is fairly suggestive, and all of it is stunning.
Crow slowed to a stop, and his gaze flickered bemusedly over him. The man was…not tall. Or remotely intimidating. He stood a couple inches shorter than him, even with the thick boots. Wide eyes shone resolutely grey-blue, the precise shade of his doublet, under a tumble of feathery white-blond curls cut a bit too short to be fashionable. And... his stubbornly-set jaw was rather less chiseled than Crow was used to seeing. No conveniently placed scars, no gritty dents or smudges on that immaculate armour. Heroes usually had cheekbones that could cut glass, but this one’s were rounded, and slightly rosy to boot. Cherubic was the word that came immediately to mind, and Crow nearly snorted out loud. He looked to be roughly Crow's own age, and was staring determinedly, if anxiously at him from behind that enormous broadsword. There was a long, tense silence as Crow and the armoured man sized each other up. The Hero spoke first. “Now see here, villain, I don’t want to have to kill you, so just turn about and head right back where you came from.” His voice was precise and educated, nearly fussy, and while self-assured was lacking in the usual bravado. Crow blinked, taken aback, and the flames in his hand faltered. “You don’t want to kill me?” “Well…no, not particularly.” The confidence wavered for an instant, then solidified. “Which is not to say that I won’t! Rest assured I will if you cause trouble!”
***
The Crawly Chronicles (series) (179K; Rated T/M/E) by @theladydrgn and @sylwritesstuff
When Aziraphale Fell, reporter for The Daily Messenger, is tasked with a simple story on smuggling, he isn't expecting to find out that Lightbringer, Inc. has been experimenting on something that could be an animal, an oil slick, or something else entirely. He especially isn't expecting that being to come home with him and change his entire life.
I’m a fan of the Tom Hardy Venom movies, which made this two-book, two-short series perfect for me. The books follow the plot of the first two movies, though book 2 also starts with the sexual relationship between the two characters.
My favorite parts of the story are of the two learning to live together while sharing a body, and Aziraphale trying to figure out how to handle having feelings for a creature he’s permanently attached to who is so completely alien (literally) that he’s not even sure that romantic and sexual love are even an option.
The food the human was making already smelled good enough to eat to them, and they did not want to wait twenty minutes. This time their control of the human's hand was less subtle as they dipped fingers into the leftover batter and brought a generous scoop of the chocolate mix to their mouth. “Nasty human's is what they were.” Aziraphale froze or at least tried to. His mouth seemed to have other ideas, cleaning the mixture from his fingers. “What- Who said that?” he demanded messily, looking around. “I did.” Aziraphale took several steps back, grasping for the cane he'd left leaning against the counter. The voice sounded as if it were everywhere around him or- or in his own mind somehow. “That's hardly reassuring. Who are you? How did you get into my home?” “Got in the same way you did, human.” They grabbed the bowl of chocolate mixture before the human stumbled too far from it, fingers scraping the last dregs of it to not waste a single bit. The cane fell to the floor. Aziraphale tried stopping himself, but he couldn't seem to make his hands do what he wanted them to do. “Stop! How-” What in the world was happening and how did he stop it? “No. I'm hungry.” “That doesn't make any sense! Stop!” he demanded, struggling to keep his chocolate covered fingers away from his own mouth. “Fine.” They still felt so weak that fighting this human for control was a struggle and a challenge that they did not want to have. It was just so much easier to slip out between their cells and wrap a long tongue around their fingers instead.
***
And finally, if you made it all the way to the end, thank you!
I have three Good Omens novels of my own I hope you’ll check out, a post-S2 with an upcoming sequel; a “they never met”/fake marriage adventure; and a reverse omens (a WIP as of 27 Dec, 2024; chapters are released on Fridays, and it should be completely posted around mid-February 2025).
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every time dilbert gets mentioned in a conversation/post i think about how hilarious it is that scott adams turned out to be such a deranged alt-right fuckwit, considering the fact that his comics indisputably radicalized me against capitalism as a kid and probably did so earlier than anything else
like there IS some pretty iffy stuff in dilbert for sure (particularly a lot of casual misogyny and xenophobia), and it definitely increased over time as the author got more edgy and self-important. i don't think i read anything from later than like 2003 and it was already starting to get pretty unreadable by then - LONG before he started openly being a turbo-racist podcaster weirdo. but the earlier stuff (especially before there were a lot of established recurring characters or running gags) was largely just a satirical cartoon focused on how corporations are evil and exploitative, and how you'd have to be completely detached from reality to truly enjoy working for them, and how trying to climb the ladder of success is a futile pursuit within a capitalist society where the upper class needs to keep pulling that ladder up behind them to keep the rest of us in our place and maintain their own status. it was basically vent art by a guy stuck working in mind-numbing desk jobs, who barely knew how to draw but just wanted to get his thoughts out and reach other people who were frustrated in the same ways he was. it's really weird but also fascinating to compare that to how it (and adams himself) ended up in the long run
i don't think it was particularly funny most of the time, and when it did have actual jokes, they were often pretty mean-spirited and/or cynical. i don't remember more than one or two specific bits from the comic that actually ever made me laugh, and i read a LOT of them as a kid (my grandpa had a massive collection of newspaper comic compilation books at his house that he'd let me look through and borrow stuff from - this is also how i discovered garfield and calvin & hobbes). but i DO remember having it instilled in me from an early age that there was nothing really exciting or praiseworthy about grinding your life away for a company that profits off your skilled labor and gives you pennies in return - which is especially noteworthy considering i was also raised by mormons, who are famously all about that "nobility in suffering" and "work your way to heaven" type bullshit. i'm genuinely unsure how this happened
anyways i think scott adams would probably piss his pants and explode if he ever took a break from peddling his psychic penis hypnosis and killer burrito podcasts long enough to seriously think about any of this stuff. (and i hope he does. it would be funnier than anything he's ever written.)
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I haven’t really made a post about my feelings on this season, other than i do like it and i do like the finale.
However, i do have a theory on this season that ive had for awhile but i felt like it was controversial to say.
I do think this season did feel slightly off but not in a bad way. Let me explain.
First, I want to say i like a lot of the ideas for this season.
I liked Guillermo “moving out” officially and “getting his own place.” I thought him living in the wank shed was funny and also getting a job in the human world was a good move. I hyperventilated when i saw he worked at Panera again.
I liked that the writers wrote in Natasia’s pregnancy with the Rosemary’s Baby bit. Nadja got to be around humans which i think she wanted to always do more of. She even became more sensitive to human issues even if she doesn’t experience those feelings exactly like humans herself.
I like when Laszlo invents and I’m glad he was able to do something that wasn’t really connected to the main plot. I like that seanie came back with Laszlo, although i missed seeing him in the finale (i did like the alt version with him.) I like the vampires getting their own side adventures and he got to do this with Colin, which was a plus. I like that we got some of his background with his dad.
I liked that Colin was feeling alone with the changing dynamics and how he came to get closer to the monster since both of them are different to the vampires.
I liked that they did bring up Nandor’s search for love again. I honestly never thought they would bring it up again. The batcave was fun and the janitor bit was funny. I liked Nandor’s army and I’m glad we could see his old warrior side again.
I like that Nandor and Guillermo reconnected and that Guillermo doesn’t leave forever. I always worried that would end the show with Guillermo saying goodbye to the vampires for good. I liked the fake-out ending where if someone wanted that ending, they got it. That was bittersweet enough for some people, and could have worked. But, i liked that he came back and that it showed us, the audience, that Guillermo is so aware of the cameras that he does hide things on camera. I like seeing Nandor and Guillermo’s first meeting.
I liked that the last scene was Nandor inviting Guillermo into his coffin and that the Newhart alternate ending is the one they use on streaming. I like that they were the married couple featured in it when it could have easily been any pairing on the show like Laszlo and Nadja or Charmaine and Seanie or even the monster and I don’t know…Jerry?? lol.
I did wish The Guide had more onscreen plot than Nandor’s kinda love interest and working with Jerry mostly offscreen, even though I’m glad they did show her love. I think i really missed her being involved in the main cast.
I would have loved if the gang had an arc together. I don’t believe the main A plot involved everyone until the end. There was a lot of side adventures (which is fun), which gets me to my theory…
I don’t think the show was supposed to end with season 6.
Yeah, I’m one of those that believes that the show was cancelled. I think they wrote season 6 with the intention to have a season 7.
I think Harvey and Kayvan’s interviews since the news broke convinced me. Especially Harvey being so heartbroken on Instagram and Kayvan mentioning a season 7 constantly. And now that they are both talking about a spin-off, it all makes sense.
I think this was just a normal season that they already wrote and when FX pulled the plug, the writers went back in and added a few things here and there.
So, yeah. Season 6 would have been their friendship era and then season 7 would’ve worked towards the romance era. Episode 10 does work as a season finale, but not a series finale.
The documentary crew ending the documentary IS SUCH A GOOD PLOT. I think it was funny that they just ended the documentary, but thought it would be funnier if they started that plot from the beginning of season 6. Imagine the vampires fighting over how to end the documentary.
Jerry could have been an episode later and he could have been killed off in the second to last episode.
I think the writers did write episode 11 as an add-on to finish the show, but it didn’t really connect with the rest of the season.
I don’t think the finale had a surprise twist at all. And this show is actually good at season finale twists. Guillermo is actually a vampire slayer?! Colin was dying and came back as a baby?! Guillermo turned into a vampire?!
Yeah, their arcs and twists are honestly really good and thought out.
But, i think whatever twist ending they had was written out. Which leads me to my old theory:
The Guillermo is an energy vampire theory.
I still actually believe this was true, or at least a version of it. Watching it with the lens of Guillermo becoming a/an (energy) vampire again makes sense as the surprise twist. Enough was laid out that it could have connected so easily.
But ending the show that way might not have worked well since i do think they needed a bit more time, and i think that’s why any vampire!Guillermo stuff was removed. Because they didn’t have time to finish it properly.
And it would have tied up Colin’s arc of loneliness. I didn’t mind him connecting with the monster (i liked it a lot actually!). It felt like they were gearing up for Colin and Guillermo to connect on some level, and connecting to Guillermo becoming an energy vampire would’ve worked pretty well. That would have connected those plots together.
I do believe they wanted to do more with Guillermo’s arc but starting too much would’ve made the season really really full.
Actually ending everyone’s arc probably would have done that, too. I want more energy vampire lore. I want more Nadja connecting to her roots. I want to know why The Guide is really magical and what’s her name??
I think they truly needed one or two more seasons for that to be honest.
Which leads me back to the Nandermo of it all, too.
I think season 6 was about Nandermo reconnection arc after season 5’s Nandermo breakup arc.
I think they wanted to have Nandor and Guillermo make up first and then work towards their romantic arc going forward.
And that makes sense to me. They spent the season making them equals. And that feels earned to me. They ended the season together as equals.
And by The Finale, it seems like the writers knew they couldn’t add enough to finish every arc. And I respect that tbh.
I would have wanted a little more time with Nandor and Guillermo reconnecting before they kissed.
I do think that was the reason for the Newhart ending. It was a fun little homage but it was a Nandermo nod without having to skip over the important romantic arc they didn’t have time for.
It left the series open enough that if they don’t do a spinoff, we can fill in the rest.
And that explains the Guillermo’s “secret affair” and “the secret Nandermo batcave” and Nandor caring about the cameras being gone.
However, I think they left it open so that if they had the chance, they could do a proper spin-off to work toward the Nandermo romance arc we deserve instead of closing that door forever.
TLDR: I like season 6, but i do think the show was cancelled by FX and that’s why it felt a little different. Hopefully we do get the Nandor and Guillermo spin-off and potentially another What We Do in the Shadows movie to wrap it up completely.
It doesn’t feel like the end, but a new beginning.
#some critique#wwdits#nandermo#nandor the relentless#nadja of antipaxos#lazslo cravensworth#guillermo de la cruz#Colin Robinson
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I'm having. So many Uchiha Houhua thoughts. Like I know so much of his existence is geared towards survival but. The hc of Uchiha's use of war fans,I have to wonder if he ever finds him half heartedly fiddling with a delicate seeming Tessen, remebering an old friend now far gone, just as razor edged and yet still missed.
And it may be my own fondness for the concept of a spider summons but so much of spider behavior is "Please Leave Me Alone" which is very on brand for Houhua. Camouflage and careful, delicate and yet still so dangerous, setting invisible webs between leaves and waiting for the worse predators to pass. (Also using spider venom to fuck with his heartrate for the possum jutsu maybe?)
The entire concept is so delightful and I'm very thankful to have seen all your little tidbits on it
YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU SENT ME A STRAWPAGE I JUST SAW IT LAST NIGHT BUT FELL ASLEEP BEFORE I COULD COPY PASTE IT TO REPLY TO HERE!!!!!!!!!!!
Omg hi funny seeing you here (<- batting my eyelashes, twirling my hair)
Anyways I love this, actually. Like, a lot.
Ough,, Houhua unable to look at war fans without thinking about both SY and SQQ,,,
I think it's actually especially fun to think ab like. The difference in fighting style between (Japanese) Uchiha styled war fan techniques and (Chinese) Cang Qiong Sect war fan techniques. Not even counting the much more specific Qing Jing Peak style of fan techniques.
That also goes double for sword techniques, especially considering the plans for Houhua to go into sword smithing.
Houhua has literal decades of the Cang Qiong sect sword style engraved into his fucking bones. Into his soul, even, if you consider the whole 'cultivators swords are usually tied to their spirits in some way' thing.
He's going to have the worst time trying to switch to Uchiha sword styles-- though I think the sharingan + the unfamiliar, tiny body without all the muscle memory of his past life will help him at least get his footing
,, Hey, is muscle memory held in the actual muscle or is it held in the brain? That's a thought.
ALSO. THE SPIDERS.
I. I cant lie to u, you are making an amazing argument rn for him having a spider summons. I love the idea sm, I am now faced w the ultimate dilemma of choosing between a spider contract or a rat contract.
On one hand, they both carry undertones of like 'there might be a bit more to see here than just a coward' bc of the associated (mostly negative) connotations of rats and spiders both being like, underhanded, sneaky, that sort of thing. But the spider tho,,, ough,, it also shows a side of implied manipulation that might be fun just from the angle of like.
Yeah you'd expect him to have some sort of rodent contract but hes actually been designated spider coded by the universe, actually.
I forget if I posted this snippet yet or if I only posted it on the discord but take this really quick:
So like. This moment, where Kabuto bets Houhua will get some form of rodent contract (for obvious reasons) while Hana bets he gets a fucking worm. But now make it even funnier bc they're both wrong and he got a spider contract.
This could also maybe play interesting into Houhua and Kabuto's sort of ongoing quiet squinting in eachothers direction as they both go 'this guy isnt as simple as he seems...' as Kabuto mentally recalculates some of Houhua's behavior
This also can just bring out a pretty fun "hey so lets talk about in universe stereotypes and associations when it comes to summoning animals" which I just think is fun. Like, culturally, what does it mean to have a contracted animal? Do some people treat it like they might astrology personality tests? Do some people think its just nonsense and pure luck or not that deep?
For some people it probably isn't that deep, while for others (specifically those who might come from families who always have the same contract, or others who sign blank contracts where they really are sent to an animal that matches them best) it really is a good way to try and analyze them
And like. Where does that leave Houhua?
This could also just be fun for when he interacts w Orochimaru, who fucking hates bugs (insert my own personal favorite hc here that he hates them largely in part due to the many times he was stuck inside his own rotting body, infested with bugs)
And like, Houhua and Orochimaru will inevitably interact, though I'm not 100% sure on how it goes just yet. But like. Houhua having a spider contract and Orochimaru coincidentally hating spiders. Could be funny.
PLUS YOU'RE SO RIGHT FOR LIKE. SPIDER VENOM POSSIBLY PLAYING INTO HIS PLAYING DEAD ACT. UR SO SMART FOR THAT.
Anyways. Yeah ok I think spider contract Houhua would go pretty hard for multiple reasons. Give him a big fluffy spider with big ol eyes.
Houhua can maybe get another contract further down the line and then get the rodents he deserves.
Im so glad that you've been enjoying the SQH in naruto au nonsense I've been pumping out!! I'm like. Halfwayish done with chapter one but it keeps getting longer. I'll get there eventually.
I really need to update my tumblr vault with all the recent additions to the au but want to update it when I post the actual fic so I can link the fic to the chapter, so I'm holding off on that
Anyways, thank you for your ask!!
#uchiha houhua#svsss#sqh#shang qinghua#naruto#scum villain self saving system#crossover#birds asks#birds fic talk#orochimaru#kabuto#kabuto yakushi#yakushi kabuto#inuzuka hana#hana inuzuka#team 7 and a half
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Yet another "you have to show your membership card to use your membership benefits" being too fucking hard for people at the movie theater story.
Today, Thanksgiving in the USA, this group came and was mad about having to show their membership card to use their membership benefits, which is something you agree to when you sign up. They wanted to report me to the manager because "you ALWAYS do this to us". And also "we've been here a few times and you should know us by now".
1, go ahead. I have been reported to the manager, or even corporate, at least 100 times by now (probably a lot more than that) about the fact that I check membership cards. And I've never gotten in trouble. Because they want me to check them. I just get told that I'm doing a good job and to keep at it. I'm one of the best door-people/ticket-takers in the company.
2, I don't personally give a fuck if you have a membership card or if you're using someone else's, even though it's against the rules. I'm a big believer in Staying In My Own Lane. But it's my job to check and I have rent to pay, so it /is/ My Lane.
3, according to my manager, we had either 33,000 or 35,000 customers yesterday (she couldn't remember which) and I was at door, and therfore interacting with every single person who came in, for eight of the 14 hours that we were open. So I helped at least 15,000 customers yesterday, and probably closer to 20,000. Believe it or not, I can't fucking remember every single person to come here a couple times. If I've seen you here weekly for several years, then maybe you can be a bit annoyed if I don't remember you, but I also have diagnosed faceblindness in association with my other disabilities and can only recognize my own parents' faces about half the time. (If I do remember you, I remember your hairstyle, or your tattoos, or how you dress, or something like that.)
On a funnier note, I had this conversation with someone at work yesterday.
Me: "um. What's in your pocket?" (It looks like a weapon)
Guy: "I'm barbecuing."
Guy: "it's a barbecue knife."
Me: "uh. A what?"
Guy: [with a tone that suggests that I should already know what he's talking about] "a barbecue knife."
And I just stared at him because what the fuck is a barbecue knife??? I know about barbecue tongs and barbecue forks, but not barbecue knives (and he can't be talking about the carving knife that sometimes comes with barbecue tongs, because it fit in his pocket, and those knives are very long)
Also, you can neither barbecue nor have knives in here anyway. Also, I don't think I'd want to eat anything that was cut by a knife that was just hanging out in some guy's pocket for who knows how long.
Posted by admin Rodney
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random list of v3 opinions after experiencing all that again:
the death road of despair segment is the pre-trial highlight of ch1. so damn good. just a perfect microcosm of the game and kaede's flaws and conflicts
maki is funnier than i remember. but she’s at her funniest when she hits shuichi with a devastating insult, usually completely unprompted
ouma and maki parallels and foiling forever and ever. they HAAATE each other. but also it’d be cool to see them get along. the whole point is that they don’t see through the other and believe the other’s lies but still
maki saying she’ll work hard to make people trust her and her talent and that she wants to survive with everyone…ough…
ouma is so mad. he wishes that were him. also that moment where everyone ignores him and tries to comfort kaito after gonta's execution. he also wishes that were him but unfortunately he's been an asshole to everyone and no one likes him so
the only way i can enjoy saio/uma is one sided ouma->shuichi where shuichi is just not invested in the cop/robber dynamic ouma wants at all. it’s funnier this way + saimota inspires a visceral upset within him. he NEEDS to fumble both kaede and shuichi.
on that note i’ve been hcing ouma as bisexual for years partially out of spite
kaito’s obnoxious charm can’t be ignored. if you think you’ve successfully done it, it means it’s just entered an asymptomatic form. it'll hit you soon enough
ch2 pre-execution >>> KIRA BUCKLAND THE VOICE ACTRESS THAT YOU ARE. EVERYONE WONDERING IF THEY MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE BY VOTING FOR KIRUMI. KAITO GOING “IDC I WANT TO LIVE, OUR LIVES ARE IMPORTANT TOO!” KIRUMI INSULTING OUMA <3 EVERYONE CHEERING FOR KIRUMI TO RUN!!! TO LIVE!!!!!!!! GAHHHH SO COOL
kaito and himiko just blatantly lying through their teeth during their ftes. the liars who suppress their true problemsssss. also him shouting that he is NOT GIVING HER A PIGGY BACK RIDE!!! EVAR!!!!! is so funny
himiko I LOVE YOUUUUU. i love her getting overly familiar with people post-development and just accidentally completely overstepping boundaries by insulting kiibo and calling maki "maki roll." she's trying so hard you guys
KAITO IS SO FUCKING DRAMATIC. HE SHOULD’VE BEEN THE MALE LEAD IN A HIGH-SCHOOL THEATRE PRODUCTION AND ANNOYED EVERYONE IN THE CREW!!!! STOP BOTHERING MAKI SHE HAS A POWER DRILL
shuichi and maki doing sit ups and the camera slowly panning to show kaito laying there hands behind his head saying his usual bullshit is one of the funniest moments of the game
tenko and himiko agree that shuichi should transition into a woman. this is true.
I don’t accept tenko slander unless it’s specifically about her obsessiveness over himiko in ch1-2 in which case I can’t defend her
if kaito shaved he’d look 13. for this reason he is legally not allowed to do that.
tsumugi and the background of v3 are SO GOOD. ABSOLUTE PEAK. in execution there are lots of weak points but after thh, sdr2, udg, and the anime series, tell me a meta story about consumption, lies, and depression that ends with the cameos from entire main games’ previous casts doesn’t go hard
don’t deny that tsumugi loved her little ocs. do you not enjoy torturing your blorbos, putting them into situations, and giving them nice things just to take those away?? shipping them and dressing them up??? making silly aus (salmon mode, utdp, arguably dr:s)?
i just wish the writers utilized her more bc i love that so much. she should've wanted to get to get more involved with everyone (giddily see her ocs up close). she should've made even more thh/srdr2 references. players assume the writers are making for cheap nostalgia points, and they are, but it's true in-universe too...she should've been so overconfident that she'd get sloppy with the situational irony... tsumugi you little freak ily
she and rantaro were 100% s52's survivors and you can pry this from my cold dead hands. her dr fangirl self can be her pre-game personality
speaking of pre-game personalities, pre-game content is at best boring to me. how they write ouma is my litmus test. if he's not enough of a nuisance, just in a different way, then it's gotta go
maki is down for a training trio polycule, shuichi is in denial about everything and fears becoming an awkward third wheel, and kaito has been trying unsuccessfully to wink-wink nudge-nudge shuichi and maki into “realizing their feelings for each other” for ages
i still think maki should have short hair. initially I thought just shorter pigtails would be ok but I’m now in the firm camp of a pixie cut with one of her scrunchies on her wrist, with her orphanage-age flashback self maintaining the pigtails. she had to cut them off for practicality’s sake but one of her hidden desires is to be able to regrow it one day. another show of her loss of identity and past life, and how every aspect of her is controlled? such a simple desire at first glance but because hair is such a simple show of autonomy…even more tragic… maybe her doomed childhood friend yuri used to do her hair …hrm…
ultimates are public, influential figures. maki’s had to assassinate friends before (rip her yakuza friend that I didn’t know she had up until recently). maki went back to being an assassin in utdp after graduating. the hope’s peak class roster MIGHT just be a hit list
for someone who includes miu in her top 3 I haven’t talked about her at all huh. it’s been maki central up in here
miu is AWFUL but when her jokes hit, they hit good and hard just like she’d want them to. she’s completely insufferable and deserves to hit ouma (also insufferable) with 3000 hammers. kiibo too but he wouldn’t want to
look just because ouma said he was doing everything for a good reason, do NOT forget that at his core he is a little dipshit. he’s a JERK!!!
brief dip into maki time again. one of my favorite aus is that maki’s doomed childhood friend is actually miu. i'll expand on this in another post
once again: drv3 and rgu are shaking hands about exiting the narrative and the follies of playing hero. read my utenanthy!kaemugi post
v3 is FARRRR from a masterpiece, but it's a solid and fitting Ending to the main games, plus it's got an insane cast with infinite dynamics and a premise which i love to bits <33 and it was the game that got me into dr, so it'll always be special in my heart. also kaito momota luminary of the stars debuted in it which gives it 5/5 stars
#its 4 am help#my post#danganronpa#drv3#ndrv3#training trio#maki harukawa#shuichi saihara#kaito momota#kokichi ouma#tsumugi shirogane#himiko yumeno#miu iruma#those are the main ones....#sadly enough while i like training trio they dont instinctively grip me as hard as ou/mota.#i cant describe my thoughts on them but just feel their purposeful absence. the negative space around them. the black and white imprints
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Dandadan Episode 9 Review - Aliens And Nessie
TW: Nudity
I think ‘unhinged’ is the best word to describe Dandadan, especially with this episode. It’s a very wacky episode that involves a lot of Okarun butt shots, a cluster of enemies, and a lot of yellow and green filters (The green filter hurts my eyes). It’s crazy how we went from heartwrenching backstories to chaotic alien fights in a span of two episodes.
It was cool seeing what Aira can do now that she can transform using Acrobatic Silky’s powers. She’s flexible and agile. I love how she moves in battle and that she also uses her hair as a weapon in addition to her added flexibility. However, I do think that her biggest weakness is the fact that she lacks fighting experience. Okarun and Momo are able to fight easily as they’ve got so much experience, but this is Aira’s first fight against a paranormal creature, so she does get clobbered often. However, her debut fight is against multiple enemies rather than a singular one like before.
The fight with the enemies is very crazy. The Serpoians felt as if they got stronger. However, since they have a weakness in that they cannot fight when using their powers, that’s where their new hire, Mantis Shrimp (Is that his name?) comes in. I do like that the fights are a mix between serious and comedic without being too out of place and off-putting. The Mantis Shrimp alien is silly, but his punches are brutal. It was interesting that he also had a more grotesque form underneath, like the Serpoians. Though, can someone help me answer this question I have? During the part where Nessie arrived, did the Serpoian and Mantis Shrimp alien fuse with Nessie? If so, then Nessie was heavily underutilized as a villain as it got no character other than being a creature that fires green laser beams.
Now that the group is a trio, their dynamics became a lot more livelier and funnier. Momo and Aira have an antagonistic, vitriolic relationship with each other with the two getting on each other’s nerves. While Momo and Okarun bicker, they have a solid trust towards each other. I love how these two communicate in that Okarun wants to talk to Momo about the misunderstanding with Aira. These two trust each other to the point that Momo can use Okarun as some sort of jet ski. Okarun isn’t that tall, yet he can still have two girls around the same height on him.
I honestly love the animation for this fight, especially towards the end where the aliens fuse with Nessie. The way the camera angle rotates and spins was really good. I also liked the animation at the final bit where the gang return to the real world but naked. The way they ran is reminiscent of the floppy animated style from the first episode, which amps up the comedic aspect of it. Aira running like a Titan in Attack on Titan was hilarious (also hilarious given that her VA Ayane Sakura and Okarun’s VA Natsuki Hanae were in that show as Gaby and Falco)
Speaking of which, I remember that there was an outrage regarding the final scene because one Anituber posted a picture of the scene in the manga when the anime first aired with the intent of being anticipated for how people, fans and anime-only viewers, would few the scene, but it went viral for negative reasons, which led to the anituber getting doxxed. I didn’t think too much of that panel at the time since I’m already used to crude shounen humor, but doxxing someone over manga panels is never an okay thing to do. When I looked at this scene in the anime, I just thought “very shounen humor” and that was it. I think the outrage was mainly due to how sensitive people are towards media these days. All I can say on the matter is that I hope that humanity can change back into the days where people could differentiate fiction from reality.
Since there are twelve episodes, this means that there are three more episodes left. I wonder what’s left for the rest of the story. I think the red-haired boy has yet to show up, so I assume the last few episodes will revolve around him? I’m also curious about the event so fate next episode as a cow gets abducted by a UFO. What are your thoughts on the episode as a whole?
#dandadan#okarun#ken takakura#momo ayase#aira shiratori#serpoians#gig worker#mantis shrimp#Loch Ness monster#review#anime#anime review#ecargmura#arum journal
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Since you've done Smitten, I'd love to see Damsel for the character meme!
(Ahhhh Damsel… my sweet girl…)
(Can’t believe I went from seeing her as a flat character to relating to her… she’s my pookie…)
(Ask game below!!! As always, excuse my formatting)
(And as usual, it’s getting longer than I’ve expected, soooo I’m just gonna put a cut somewhere)
FAVORITE THING ABOUT THEM
Honestly I think she’s so funny for no reason and I lowkey love that for her. Her preppy personality is honestly kind of endearing once you get through and understood her character. To think I once thought it was creepy…
The fact that she remains preppy is honestly kind of amazing considering what she had went through. She must have been so scared and yet she continues on with a smile anyway.
Her way of coping through pleasing people is also really relatable for me. I’m kind of a people pleaser myself, so I really saw bits of myself in her. I really want to see her grow into something more, and maybe she will get her growth of change through HEA(or at least take advice from her experiences).
Speaking of, I really like the transition from her to HEA. Like her shock when Smitten rips out our heart and shows it to her when she says that she wants to leave is probably such a shocking moment for her. She probably never expected that from you. Also. Parallel with Nightmare showing her heart to you. Oughhhh so good.
LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT THEM
In the words of Smitten:
“She is gorgeous! Absolutely Devine!”
(There is none /j)
Ok but seriously it’s probably her inability to say “no”. (Again, this is out of love for her!!!!)
I see a lot of myself in her, so her inability to say no just resonates with me since I used to have that difficulty as well. Damsel simply doesn’t know how to say no, as it wasn’t in her own nature to do so. But with that inability also hurts her and her inner self, which makes her kind of a doormat. I really don’t want her to be stepped all over, so this is for your own good Damsel!!! Protect yourself!!!! DON’T FEEL BAD ABOUT SAYING NO!!!
FAVORITE LINE
“I’m gonna die now ^^ I think that’s what you want :3”
GIRL YOU’RE DYINGGGGG
(The game is funnier then I remember what the hell)
BROtp
Oooooo there are a lot of good options for this actually, I don’t think I could just choose a couple of them
Damsel and Prisoner is a classic. I could imagine Damsel being really naive about the darker and grittier stuff and Prisoner had to teach her to protect herself from the horrors because Pris knows that the world is not as innocent as Damsel believes it to be. I can see Pris being a bit protective over her.
Damsel and Witch is another fun one. Damsel’s naive and trusting nature versus the creature who lies and does a little trickery.
OK WAIT I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING
Damsel and the Cat princesses. Disney Princess and creatur. Holy sh!t.
OTP
I’m starting to fw her with Stranger or Witch as a pairing. I can see the vision.
Stranger cause she is many perspectives at once, while Damsel is, at least on the surface, a flat character fully embracing her role as the damsel in distress. Stranger would be such a comforting presence for Damsel, as she would gently guide her to be more than who she already is. While Damsel, due to her nature, would try and make Stranger happy and please her. She then realises that she doesn’t need to please her since she already loves her unconditionally. It’s just. So fluffy ok.
Damsel and Witch is an interesting one, cause Damsel is basically Witch but if she hadn’t been betrayed. Witch would see her old self in her, and in turn she would teach Damsel to protect herself. Damsel teaches Witch to trust and love herself again. Just. Oughhhh…
NOtp
She and Smitten. I forgot to say this in the Smitten post but. I love y’all individually but get them far away from each other 😭😭
As hilariously sweet these two are together they are literally two people pleasers being put in a room together. Their happiness and emotional stability is fully based on the other’s happiness. They can’t exactly grow from their experiences during their time together and they’re just gonna make each other worse. At least to me.
“But at least they’re happy right???” Oh just you wait when they get themself into a long term relationship. It’s really fricking tiring.
Ik they’re not people so it really doesn’t matter too much on whether it’s an endless loop of trying to make the other happy, but, y’know.
RANDOM HEADCANON
It’s not really a headcanon as it’s heavily implied, but I feel like Damsel would probably be the only one who can’t fight (or at least unwilling to). Like, at all. She has strength yes but she is also really hesitant to use that strength considering that the last time she used her strength it had cost the life of a person she cared for. I feel like if a person she really care for told her to do something like hurting someone else, she would definitely be unwilling to, but would do it anyway because she just doesn’t want the other person to hate her. It would definitely traumatise her further though.
And yes. She does talk to animals like a Disney princess. I just thought it would be funny.
UNPOPULAR OPINION
People often see her as an airhead but I feel she is smarter than we think she is. Or well, not a complete idiot I mean. She seems to be nudging the player to continue believing that as long as they think is possible, then it’s possible. She does have a bit of a grip on how the construct seems to be forcing you to do something that you don’t want to do, and so she acts the way that she is by nudging you to believe that you can best the construct. Kind of like how Prisoner tries to nudge you into getting her memo. Burned Grey kinda reveals that she does know(or had assumed) that the construct is forcing them to hurt each other, so I supposed that is basically confirmed? I dunno
(Feel free to correct me though)
SONG I ASSOCIATE WITH THEM
I don’t have a song that I associate with her unfortunately 😭
At least not at the top of my head…
FAVOURITE PICTURE OF THEM
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Determined Damsel!!!
Drew her while reading a fluffy fic teehee
#slay the princess#black tabby games#stp#slay the princess insight#stp ask#stp the damsel#stp damsel
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Papa Emeritus, Terzo and the weight of the Mitre.
Due to popular demand, here is my Terzo analysis. It has been significantly cut down(if you do want the uncut analysis, here) because most of it was bullet points and unhinged notes I made. To be completely transparent, this was inspired by @cityofmeliora's own Terzo analysis post as well as several other analyses which I will be linking (also some headcanon stuff the wifecule had cooked up together lol).
These are all the posts (1 2 3 4 5 ) I used as resources and this compilation of Ghost interviews, as well as the Metal Myths part 2, because that's sort of required viewing at this point, isn't it?
I'll be splitting this analysis up into sections, first are brief descriptions and explanations of my understanding of the different aspects of Terzo - as Papa, as a Cardinal and as himself.
As for my sources, I won't be inserting the direct quotes here(because this post would be the longest ever) and they are all available in the aforementioned links.
Anyway, onwards, Ghesties!
First of all, What is Papa?
This is in reference to Papa, the entity, the image - not the person. Papa is a character, he's a mask, he's a façade. He is an image and an idea and the face of the Clergy. He is everything and he is above all yet he is not. According to mister Ghost-man himself, he is a stereotype, he is someone you know from somewhere and often than not he's old, charismatic, maybe a little bit bitter. He is sort of nebulous, he is a concept.
All whom take up the mantle, the Mitre, live up to this to a certain degree, it's part of the job! It also might be part of the bloodline, but y'know.
In that case, who is Papa Emeritus III?
The character of Papa III, the performer, the leader, the one to show us the way. Papa III is the face of the Ministry, he is a showman, a diva who is perfect for the role of the Satanic Pope who is not only theatrical, but also charismatic and fun and ambitious! He is artistic and outspoken. He knows what he's doing, he loves having a good time - drinks, partying, sex! He encourages it, as long as everyone is safe. He wants to bring about a new age, something to thrive. He will lead us all to damnation!
Papa III cares for his people, he makes sure they are safe and sound even in the midst of the chaos of the Rituals. He is, after all, the messenger that leads the audience through the hero's journey - a guide.
Cardinal Terzo
Let me be clear, this is all derived from Bishop Necropolitus Cracoviensis (who is representative of the album artist Zbigniew Biela) testimonial on Terzo when they were buddies back in Poland.
Cardinal Terzo was a slutty slutty, party man with a revolution in mind. He actually had a lot of visions and ideas to keep the Ministry going and modernizing it. He seemed super, well, locked in. He also likes Futurism, which aligns with his Art Deco and German Expressionism in his box of early 20th century art movements. He saw a future and he wanted to bring it to life, he held the same sins as his brother, Vice, Lust, Greed - but he had Ambition (credit to user cityofmeliora for this epiphany). That's what set it all off. Cardinal Terzo had that joie de vivre.
But who is Terzo?
Terzo Emeritus is a man of many pleasures - it's just those pleasures don't often involve people. He likes early 20th century fashion, he likes early 20th century art movements, he likes theater, he participates in it. He does have a pleasant personality, perfectly charming and joyful and teasing - but, he's not 'on' all the time. Or rather, he might not genuinely feel that way unless something or someone actually interests him. He might not be as slutty as everyone thinks he is. He moves like a fucking cryptid when he isn't performing, which is even funnier considering how open he seems to act. He wanted to do so much as Papa, he cared a lot. He had so many ideas, he wanted to take care of his flock and wanted to spread his ideas and cement the Ministry as a real power by opposing all those mindsets that keep holding society back. He was a revolutionary taken out too soon for another agenda at play, which is his true tragedy.
If anything, his charming Papa persona is what draws people in - but it's untouchable, because it's an idea, a face he puts on. Terzo is most likely the mellow, a toned down version of that face. Secondo influenced him, not enough for him to be exactly like him, though, so.
On a very real level - he's sort of like that 'when your circle small but y'all are crazy' meme. He has only a few people who are truly close to him and know what he wants and who he is while everyone else is on the outside looking in. He seems to keep people at bay, even the ones he approaches first. It's the people who either stick around and play along long enough to catch all his little ticks or the ones who saw through it all in the first place who get close to him.
That self hatred and hatred of everyone came a little later, when everything started to not fit into place anymore. He had restrictions on him, he couldn't bring his vision to life - he began to resent that idea. He knew that he was expendable, it was inevitable that he would be gone soon. He was still Papa, he cared, he wanted better for the Ministry. But it was, to a point, all for nothing if he was going to be stifled.
Ambition and hubris being his downfall is just a repetition of every Greek Tragedy we've been told. And much like the Bringer of Light, Terzo was brought down to Hell. Thanks Sister Imperator.
Sorry if some of this sounds a bit silly, it is quite self indulgent and made when I was sleep deprived. But also, I love character analysis and I love Ghost so!
Bonus tidbit: All that talk of separate travel made me think that Terzo might like sightseeing as a fun headcanon. So in my mind he might have a film camera stashed somewhere to take with him. It fits with the idea that he is quite a recluse and takes time to himself, he doesn't need to socialize to go out and see things and take pictures. Of course this is also extrapolated from his nerdy film and art interests. (this part was inspired by a convo with @3hroo)
#the band ghost#papa emeritus iii#ghost bc#papa terzo#terzo emeritus#terzo headcanons#terzo analysis#warden speaks#papa iii#terzo characterization#analysis#lore
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Astro observations
Sister signs are the funniest to look at sometimes, because much like sisters there will be the similarites. For instance, Leo and Aquarius are both cocky asf but you know what the difference is between them? Idk if it's just the leos I've met or what but they will say they don't care what others think of them and yet when you say something about them all of the sudden they in their feelings. I can say this as a leo rising too cause bitch, no puedo mentir....if you talk about my looks I might feel some kind of way lowkey. Mostly because it is one of those things that I take seriously about myself so it feels really odd when someone who (in my opinon) doesn't look as good as me and disses me on the way I look...I'm going to be acting (with a lack of better words) like a bitch. I think this is why I get along with libra placements so well because I swear if a libra calls you ugly, you know they can say that shit with no worry of pushback. Like have you see libra placements...motherfuckers rule Venus for a reason (taurus are also pretty but it is definitely different if you know what I mean, I jsut wanted to point that out since Taurus also rule Venus and I didn't want any confusion). Moving on what I wanted to point out is that Aquarius (at least from the ones I've met) honestly don't seem to care. Like I think depending on the placements of the person it could change some stuff up but overall most Aquarius I have met in certain things say they don't care and they won't. Like if you say shit about something they don't care about...they simply won't really react as opposed to thier sister sign leos (fire signs can't help it, it is me I am the fire sign).
Literally Leos it's okay to care about shit...like own up to it. It's better than contradicting yourself. And yes ranting a whole bunch about something does count as caring about it. I'm sorry to break the news to you (i know breaking news people care about things). I do wanna repeat that this is based off my own personal experience as a leo rising with my sun in aries (17 degree) and my venus in the fifth degree (if you don't know those are leo degrees), so I am calling myself out a bit when I wrote this.
Moving on, I might write more about the sister signs in another post
Is it just me or are a lot of Pisces suns I've met happen to be left handed? Like I assume being left handed and a Pisces is one of the biggest coincidences I have experienced in my life. It's even funnier cause I remember meeting a person who was ambidextrous and they had a Gemini sun, libra moon, and a Pisces mars. I asked them if they were left handed and just had to learn how to write with their right hand (apparently left handed is connected to Satan or something like that) , but actually they just decided to write with their left hand as well because it felt more balanced to them. I find it funny because of the whole thing of doubles in these three signs. Gemini= Twins, Libra= Scales, and Pisces = two fish.
Alright final thing, mercury in the fifth house in synastry is definitely a moment to experience. It is one of my favorite house overlays in synastry from usually being one of the most fun conversations I have had with someone with this overlay. Generally speaking air house overlays with mercury is great but something about the fifth house really goes for me. I want to assume it's because my fifth house is in sag and I already have a ninth house stellium natally plus a sag mars. Plus my Aries mercury is helpful in this as well but ehh.
Anyways I would love to hear you guy's thoughts, or even any suggestions on what I should talk about next.
#astrology#astro#astrology observations#astro observations#astro posts#sagittarius#synastry#leo#aries#natal chart#astro notes
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It's actually crazy how I keep getting more and more convinced Yuuji and Sukuna are in love, when I first started shipping them I just thought their hatred for each other was interesting and could potentially lead to love but I figured I'd have to stick to fanfictions for that, but Gege just keeps making their relationship more and more sus?
This week alone with the Wasuke as the twin reveal (which might not change the actually plot but it definitely changes my reading of the story by a lot) and then dropping the Sukuita dance art, where they're holding hands while Yuuji looks so overjoyed to be in his arms and Sukuna, the tsundere that he is, looks upset but continues to hold Yuuji close anyway AND the "abominable righteousness. a steadfast anchor for the soul" quote right next to them??? That's clearly meant to be Sukuna's true feelings about Yuuji since the other cards were all words spoken to Yuuji by Gojo, Nanami, and Choso respectively. But- I have no words, this is as close to canon Sukuita as I think Shounen Jump would ever allow lmfao.
This is the most unexpected ship of mine that's received so much canon content, I'd expect this from some of my more vanilla ships but Sukuita??? Insane.
Hi anon!
The effect of Sukuna and Yuuji is the more you pay attention to them, the more you'll grow to like them (and start shipping them). These two have an interesting relationship no matter how you look at it (or them in general). It's true that they're subtle but then, they're also extremely loud (what the fuck was Shinjuku arc even about like they've spent more time caressing each other than fighting) and it's true that, in the beginning, there was little content but good content nonetheless. If you ask me, it was extremely sus even back then because why was Sukuna so amused by Yuuji? Why was he out there making Binding Vows's not to hurt people (someone who enjoys killing, mind you) just to get control of his body? The same Sukuna who slices people to bits if they raise their head in his presence (what he did to Jogo and those girls)... ?? Just what.
But now that we've reached the end... we have enough content to last us a lifetime and convince us that these two are certainly not in a platonic relationship. I, too, found them interesting at the beginning (more about all of that in a different post! I have to answer one anon.) but wasn't expecting anything even if I realized, as we kept progressing further and further into the plot, just how valuable these two are to it and how tied in are to the entirety of the story. Sure, jjk has a lot of other characters, but Sukuna and Yuuji stole the show in the end and went out with a bang. Not only did Yuuji change the unchangable but Sukuna and him! Danced! This is even funnier when you know what the epilogue was trying to hint at which puts even more emphasis on how their relationship is clearly not one of enemies and neither of friends.
Gege always had something more to say when it comes to these two, which also adds to the whole "hey I do think these two are... definitely something". They won't add just a tiny piece of content, but would rather drop some mind-numbing, plot-changing lore about them. The fact that they first dropped the Wasuke and Sukuna sharing souls plot point and then dropped official art of them dancing is hilarious to me. Like it's always something big, something huge! Whenever it's something about these two, you know damn well it won't be insignificant and that Gege will deliver.
"abominable righteousness. a steadfast anchor for the soul" quote right next to them??? That's clearly meant to be Sukuna's true feelings about Yuuji since the other cards were all words spoken to Yuuji by Gojo, Nanami, and Choso respectively.
Oh, don't even get me started on that, anon. I already ranted my friends' ears off about how that quote is insane. Yuuji is somebody who Sukuna used to see as insignificant but now he's finally not stubborn enough to admit that yes... all that hate wasn't really hate. There's admiration there. There's "I'll always have you".
I mean, it's pretty clear to anyone who followed this manga that Sukuna doesn't really hate Yuuji. If he did, all of this wouldn't have happened and would've been different lmfao. What we did lack tho was his opinion on him. His actual, truthful opinion. Sukuna loves to lie after all and loves to pretend he doesn't care when in fact he does... very much so.
And yes, anon. This is as close to canon we can get. They're tied to each other, forever in love and Yuuji even promised his forever to him, to be there even if the world wouldn't accept him. That's fucking insane genuinely. It awfully sounds like a marriage proposal because saying that to someone you lowkey used to ignore and despise *checks notes* a couple of months ago is baffling. Why would you promise someone to walk by their side forever, even if the entire world is against them? Come on now. There's no platonic explanation for that.
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ok I was hesitant to make this post because I don't want to sound like I'm bragging or something but friends said it's okay and also, this is my blog and I decide what goes here xD so let me tell you the story of my almost-encounter with Mr. Bodyguard right before Kraków gig because it has left me smitten like a teenage girl haha 😄 (there is no way to write this story without making it weird, I'm afraid)
This was right as I was preparing for my turn at ticket control at the gates. The entrance to the venue was through this big long tent, and the ticket control guys were standing a few steps inside, right behind security control.
I was on high alert for a longer while because many people ignored the queue numbering system and were cutting in line, but when I was just at the doors, I focused instead on preparing my ticket and opening pockets for the security officers so it goes quickly. I was practically standing in the door already, so I thought, hey, there is no space left between me and the wall, nobody will cut in line now, let's chill.
And then I noticed a movement to my left. It confused me because someone was moving out of the doors, not inside as I feared, but my automated response to line cutters immediately returned. (Notice all of this was happening super fast and I was already dumbfounded from all the chaos around, but it only makes it funnier)
So I look to my left and basically this is what I see
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(you know how human eye doesn't see anything while it is moving? There was a lot movement happening here, nevermind) so yeah at this point my logical thinking already figured out who this, but my emotional brain was ready to protest and exclaim, „personal space!!!”. Then I looked at his face and without doubt, it was Mr. Bodyguard himself! And as it would be awkward to argue with him because, well, I like him 👉👈, I ended up saying only one letter.
„O.” Must have sounded funny but there is no way he heard that, he was already disappearing behind the corner of the queue. Man is super fast! Like, scary fast for real! And didn't seem to notice me any more than was needed to avoid bumping into me or the other people around.
I checked once again and still couldn't believe how he fit between me and the door. The magician, wizard, ninja! What kind of trick was that? Did I just imagine it? But looking to the right he was standing there, a little in the distance, talking to the venue security or whoever those people were.
Then it was my turn for check-up so I couldn't think about it anymore but once I could, I couldn't stop XD he was so discreet there was absolutely no interaction, and I only noticed at the last possible moment. And I can't help but think any closer and we would be hugging 🙉
So yeah this would be my story, it left such an impression on me that I can't stop thinking about it and also I remember it fondly because 🥰 well it was very nice. Thank you for reading hihihi
#of course he wasn't wearing a suit and tie but casual tshirt and jacket this is just an illustration#pan ochroniarz#my beloved#käärijä#huh why is big boss trending
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